#the real REAL lawblr

[youjustgotlawyered]

When a boomer tries to privately email an insult about you but they accidentally hit reply all:

[starboundsingularities]

good lird they did not make a gimmick blog about a real life murder

#someone fucking DIED but whatever who gives a shit it's funny i guess

7 notes

🥚 eggvidenced Follow

honestly with how suspicious and confusing everything on the dl-6 case was i wouldn't be surprised if it came out that it was that prosecutor guy tbh

🌟 rockliker270 Follow

date posted: june 23, 2010

1,834,853 notes

⚖️ courtofpublicopinions Follow

🌟 rockliker270 Follow

ok hear me out. what abt winston payne though

🧊 just--ice Follow

okay now they're just making lawyers up

#also didn't mvk die or something?

28,932 notes

🔥 triedbyfire Follow

why the fuck are you people still posting about the gavinners as if theyre not copaganda. didn't the guitarist get convicted of murder

🎸 guiltiest-lovers837 Follow

so fucking tired of this "um um didn't daryan get convicted of murder" YEAH AND HE'S LITERALLY NOT IN THE FUCKING BAND ANYMORE. dipshit

🔥 triedbyfire Follow

are you gonna address the copaganda thing or

1,092 notes

🌻 attorneybout Follow

he's so. 😳

📂 trialanderror Follow

why is he defending

📂 trialanderror Follow

OP WHY IS HE DEFENDING???

24,374 notes

🦈 giantlakemonsters Follow

i just wanna hear about another gourdy sighting thats all

🥜 liberdeez Follow

op. i'm so sorry op. gourdy isn't real you have to let her go. they had a whole trial about it.

🔐 wrightorwrong Follow

hi!! so this isn't actually the case as while gourdy was briefly mentioned in a trial, said trial had nothing to do with whether or not gourdy was "real" per se as much as. well. murder, actually. while gourdy WAS found out to be an inflatable steel samurai this was not brought up in the case at all as the veracity of gourdy wasn't really as relevant as the fact that the witness was looking for gourdy rather than at the murder she claimed to have seen. plus this was also a relatively small part of a MUCH larger trial which for those interested not only solved the dl-6 case but ALSO marked the end of prosecutor von karma's ~40 year long record and the court records are really a fascinating read through!!

🦀 mad_libz_87 Follow

net 0 information post

#thanks again lawblr

94,834 notes

🍒 cherriescoola Follow

btw i was at the park the other day and klavier gavin (of gavinners fame) was there and obv there was a huge crowd but this guy was there with him and at some point he (the other guy) waved to the crowd and someone still screamed like it was klavier??? who was that guy ive never seen him before in my life

2,284 notes

🩸 has-dl6-been-solved-yet Follow

December 28, 2016

YES!!!

702,947 notes

🪙 tellerlikeitis Follow

guys help i'm a bank teller and this guy just introduced himself as robin banks what do i do

🔪 violencekilling Follow

you gotta let him rob you that's the law

302,948 notes

👻 ghostesswiththemostest Follow

look if i ever get convicted of murder im just hiring the lawyer with the coolest sounding name

💼 courtofwaw Follow

bestie if you already got convicted it is Too Late

62,193 notes

📋 lawandwhoreder Follow

guys i know it's real fun to think people just can predict whatever but if you look at the earliest reblogs of that post that "guessed" the true killer in the dl-6 case it was actually a post about how they didn't want to go to the store. clearly edited

#stg nobody bothers to factcheck anything anymore

7,293 notes

🐺 lawnewolf Follow

i am NOT homophobic or whatever the fuck you guys are saying now i just think its weird to write fanfiction about realass people?? go touch grass ffs

🌈 lawsbian Follow

the fun police (this guy) putting me in yaoi court but the lawyers (phoenix witrght and miles edgeworth) just keep trying to make out (real court is like this too btw)

🐺 lawnewolf Follow

YOU HAVE SOMETHING WRONG WITH YOU.

#look idc what your enemies to lovers fic bullshit says #they're straight. and more importantly REAL PEOPLE. #there's TENSION because they are in COURT and there are LIVES on the LINE. #not because they wanna fuck. god.

12,293 notes

🔮 inhighspirits Follow

why dont they just ask the spirit mediums to ask the victims who killed them this law shit is easy

837,495 notes

💞 lawveyourself Follow

seriously i cant believe they gave this guy a law degree

💞 lawveyourself Follow

what do you mean evidence fraud

503,893 notes

🎧 instrumentalillness Follow

fuck you *unguilties your love*

384,568 notes

🎀 copiicat Follow

perjury isnt illegal btw in fact if youre one of tge witnesses youre legally required to lie on the stand. thats why everyone does it. trust me

[vividstardustrevolution]

Disabled people (both people with physical disabilities and people with psychological disabilities) should be able to get housing, food, medical needs, etc met without having to work or stay in school. ...Okay, really, everyone deserves access to free or affordable housing, food, and medical care, but disabled people ESPECIALLY deserve it because if I, a law student with "low support needs" autism, depression, GAD, OCD, and ADHD, cannot afford to take a break from school and take a semester off because I'd have to start repaying my loans because I had to drop down to three credits last fall and because I would have to get a job, so it wouldn't really be a break (which, I have had one job in my life, and I'm not fully convinced it wasn't a fluke, and also, trying to maintain a job when you have disabilities is difficult), I can only imagine that disabled people with higher support needs are even more fucked than me when it comes to being able to get housing and food and medical care without much, if any, funding.

Yes, Medicaid, Medicare, Food Stamps, and housing programs exist in the US, but, uh, I hate to break it to y'all, but that doesn't fully fix the problem, at all. There are a lot of old apartment complexes that are straight up inaccessible if you use a wheelchair. I'm living in one now. Applying for Medicaid and other programs can be a pain in the ass, especially when you're disabled.

"Just live with your parents!" My parents were emotionally abusive and emotionally neglectful, transphobic, and they literally harassed me so much during my 1L year that I still have nightmares.

"Live with a roommate!" I tried to. It went fucking terribly.

"Are you really disabled if you're able to be in law school?" YES. YES I AM.

Actually, on that note, law schools and the law profession need to become more accommodating for disabled people ASAP. Buck v. Bell needs to be overturned. Courts should be wheelchair accessible. Having to get past seven plus different forms of ableism just to graduate and pass the bar is ridiculous. Seriously, can we get some resources for disabled people in law school and the law profession, please?

Disabled rights matter, and we have every right to be able to live in peace and get our needs met, regardless of our support needs, disabilities, or anything else.

[kaurwreck]

One of my law professor once said, "You're a lawyer defending your case. There's gotta be blood. It has to be bloody because you're not nice. You shouldn't be nice. You're a lawyer. And you're here to win your case." and although im aware that he said it mostly as a joke—before he said that he pointed one of my classmate to tell him how they'd defend their company in the face of lawsuit and got a little disappointed with how tame my classmate answer was—i can't help but be curious of your thought on that as someone who's working in the field

We are ethically obligated to be zealous advocates for our clients. However, it is immensely difficult to advocate for your client effectively if you've managed to make everyone else involved, including the judge and opposing counsel, angry.

To provide an example, when I was a paralegal at a plaintiff-side workers' compensation firm, opposing counsel once forced our horrifically injured client to travel an hour to our office for a settlement conference, despite not having the authorization to settle for anything close to an amount he should have recognized as reasonable. My attorney, rightfully and righteously furious, laid into him in the middle of our office, humiliating him in front of the parties and our firm. Four days later, my attorney realized we needed a deadline extension, for which we'd have to request opposing counsel's permission. Opposing counsel was gracious enough to agree to the extension, but he very well could have said no after how we spoke to him, and that would have damaged our client's case.

More recently, as a transactional attorney, I was tasked with drafting a disengagement letter addressed to a manufacturer who had failed to design the product my nonprofit client ordered to my client's specifications, which had, for lack of a better term, fucked my client re: my client's other obligations. The law and facts were on our side; if the matter went before a court, we very likely would have won, and easily at that. (For frame of reference, my client serves disadvantaged children. Even the optics were on our side.) But, my client is a nonprofit, and every penny spent on litigation would have been a penny taken from my client's mission. Thus, to zealously advocate for my client, I couldn't go balls to the wall such that the other party became incensed and filed suit or protracted our disengagement process.

You don't have to be nice, but you have to be professional, thoughtful, and strategic. You don't win lawsuits and negotiations from drawing blood. You do so by achieving the outcome that your client asked you to achieve.

[ziggyevenstar]

court employed lawyer off duty!!🎀🍃 i feel so laid back now compared to when i was in law school and reviewing for the bar. am i really living a happy lyf???

[shadowed-yet-vibrant]

Today, our firm hosted a CLE about mental health and substance abuse in the legal profession. It was a well-done presentation, trying to fit the breadth of a decades-long systemic issue into a neat PowerPoint while keeping it at only one hour long (not .1 more or .1 less).

It feels like a pointless uphill battle. You're asked to make 2100 billed hours per year (or more). As a junior associate you need to achieve perfection - but you don't even know where the standard is, not yet, you're too new and you're trying your best. You're asked to attend non-billable CLEs and networking events and participate in bar associations and look ahead to business development and go out with your colleagues and socialize with clients in non-billable events and. and. and. You know who at the firm is an alcoholic - maybe you are too. You laugh at jokes about online gambling - you know the partner who gambled away his last paycheck, and he's laughing. You know who's filing for their third divorce. Who's about to lose the kids. Who missed their son's state-level championship game because they had a call with a prospective client (he won't forget, he'll never forget).

But they ask you to take care of your mental health (but you're chastised if you don't respond to the 1am email from the partner within 10 minutes). But they ask you to take care of your physical health (but there's a beer fridge in the break room). But they ask you to practice well-being (but they expect you on-call 24/7). But they tell you to get enough sleep (but the junior associate got less than an hour because of the partner's poor planning). But you need to look out for signs of mental health concerns in your peers (but you're also thinking about dying).

I could write a novel on this. Many attorneys have written similar ramblings, articles, studies, surveys, so I don't really need to. It's a problem. But there's been no real attempts at change. Sure, yes, there's awareness. But billable demands keep rising. So do standards in not just federal court, but state court. But you're at a firm that pays so well you'll endure whatever demands they put on you because that's just too damn good to lose. But you feel like shit every day. But- hey, well, the partner has been doing this for 45 years now. Why can't you?

[themirokai]

It gave me a 1.2 percent performance reliability drop. I tapped Pin-Lee's feed and sent to her, Make a legal thing so I don't have to do that.

I stg “make a legal thing so [we] don’t have to do that” is like 25% of what my clients ask for.

Another 40% is “make a legal thing so we CAN do that.”

Well done, Murderbot, you have successfully imitated human legal clients. Obviously Pin-Lee did not blink at this request.

[saul--transman]

"In the workforce you have to argue things you don't agree with"

how about we don't make minority students argue against their own humanity so the white cishets can have a fun little debate about topics that they'd never give a shit about otherwise

[lawbyrhys]

Lawyer Breaks Down The Imane Khelif Lawsuit

I am an American attorney, and even though this lawsuit was filed in French court, I can still break it down and give my thoughts on the situation.

Let's get into this high-profile criminal lawsuit.

Algerian boxer and Olympic gold medalist Imane Khelif has filed a criminal complaint in French court last Friday, August 9, alleging that "acts of aggravated cyber harassment” have been perpetrated against the star athlete since her appearance at the Summer 2024 Olympics in Paris.

The lawsuit was filed with the anti-online hatred center of the Paris public prosecutor’s office and names X as the defendant; X as it refers to unknown persons in French law. Doing so "ensure[s] that the ‘prosecution has all the latitude to be able to investigate against all people," including those who may have shared hateful messages under pseudonyms and screen names.

To discuss another X in this case, though, Elon Musk finds himself named in the lawsuit, as does author J.K. Rowling. The pair have found themselves at the center of the controversy, having taken to their respective social media channels to post their takes and stoke the flames surrounding Khelif. "J. K. Rowling and Elon Musk are named in the lawsuit, among others,' says Nabil Boudi, Khelif's Paris-based attorney.

What about former president and 34-time convicted felon Donald Trump, though? He's shared his own remarks on the Algerian boxer. "Trump tweeted, so whether or not he is named in our lawsuit, he will inevitably be looked into as part of the prosecution."

Khelif's time at the 2024 Olympics—despite winning gold in women's 66kg boxing—has been overshadowed by speculation regarding her gender. It's important to note that Imane Khelif is a cisgender woman; she was born female and does not identify as transgender or intersex. The International Olympic Committee backs these facts, too, stating that "scientifically, this is not a man fighting a woman." Yet, the vitriol continues; the internet at large has been having a field day with it.

Adding to the flames are Elon Musk and J.K. Rowling. Musk, who is the owner of the X site, shared a post from swimmer Riley Gaines that read, "Men don't belong in women's sports," approving the message with one of his own: "Absolutely." Additionally, Rowling posted an image of Khelif and Italian boxer Angela Carini mid-fight with a caption accusing Khelif of "[being a man who was] enjoying the distress of a woman he’s just punched in the head." She posted this to her 14.2M X followers. Donald Trump piped in—as he's known to do—with his own caption for the image of Khelif and Carini, with a vow of sorts: "I will keep men out of women’s sports!" A campaign promise, maybe?

Interestingly, even Logan Paul had something to say. As if Paul isn't busy enough with his frivalous defamation lawsuit against fellow creator Coffeezilla, he added to the mix with his denouncement of Khelif's triumph over Carini:

"This is the purest form of evil unfolding right before our eyes. A man was allowed to beat up a woman on a global stage, crushing her life’s dream while fighting for her deceased father. This delusion must end." Paul later deleted this post, though, admitting that, "might be guilty of spreading misinformation." He doesn't want yet another lawsuit on his hands—that's my take.

Khelif's attorney isn't buying any of the bullshit, though, and nobody's apology will absolve them of their legal liability in his eyes. "That lawsuit is filed and the facts remain."

About the intentions of the lawsuit, Boudi said:

"What we’re asking is that the prosecution investigates not only these people but whoever it feels necessary. If the case goes to court, they will stand trial." As it pertains to those on US soil, he adds that "[the lawsuit] could target personalities overseas. The prosecutor’s office for combating online hate speech has the possibility to make requests for mutual legal assistance with other countries." Boudi cites an agreement between the French and American equivalent office per the online hate speech.

The lawsuit is intended to prosecute individual social media users and not the platforms themselves. As Boudi states, "It’s the responsibility of lawmakers to issue sanctions to platforms, not ours," going on to note the severity of similar cyber harassment cases, and that in some cases, "there are prison sentences."

Judicial systems worldwide have begun to take cyber crimes like these more serious in recent years. As use, popularity, and reliance on the internet grow, so must the laws and protections.

Khelif's coach, Pedro Diaz, has even weighed in on all the controversy surrounding his champion athlete. He states the hate has "incredibly affected her and everyone around her."

What do you think of this case? Let me know!

[noirandchocolate]

I reviewed another opinion for a judge in a case I worked on, and she not only copied my supervisor on an e-mail glowing with praise for my memo and how quick and helpful my editing was, she asked me to call her just so she could 'thank me properly' for explaining a complicated area of the law she was unfamiliar with and 'making her job so much easier.'

^(^o^)^ I am gooooood at what I do and everybody says so!!!

[not-your-lawyer]

To bar-takers tomorrow:

Y’all have got this and will come out on the other side. Good luck everyone.

[youjustgotlawyered]

Going to a disability rights summit and it having zero topics relating to serious mental health issues is peak disability rights.

Along with a requirement the summit be in person, masked up, with a presenter saying they just tested positive for Covid. And another saying we forgive local officials for wrongs they’ve committed in the past to move forward.

Who is “we”?

[hamletthedane]

omg I’m applying to law schools this year and I’m so scared of the bar. where did you go to school and do you recommend it??

1. a fancy T-14 law school (don’t ask me why. even I don’t know)

2. as a wise CW Network parody song once said:

[attorney-anon]

Goodnotes Stuff

So lately, I've gotten into using Goodnotes to keep track of my work because I have a large enough case load that it really, truly helps to give myself a running checklist, and I prefer digital notetaking because then I can use stickers without actually losing them (because commitment is scary).

I even made myself a colorful to-do list template with my firm's branding colors on it so that it serves as a reminder that when I have it open, I'm supposed to be working. And I've set up a way to color-code my notes so I can tell at a glance what's done, what's urgent, and what's on the horizon. For tasks that I am dependent on someone else doing their job, I have a way to notate who/what I'm waiting on. And I converted my handwriting into a cute font, so that it feels personalized.

To the extent that any of this is helpful to anyone else, here are the non-self-identifying papers, covers, stickers, and color palettes I've made for myself. Not everything is in every color, because I do these according to my attention span. Feel free to recolor/reshare/whatever.

I will add on to this as I remember to do so.

[shadowed-yet-vibrant]

Big decisions about abortion and LGBTQ rights make better headlines but SCOTUS just eviscerated the Chevron doctrine and no one but my dork-ass lawyer colleagues knows how immense this is (even if Chevron was arguably dead in the water before, and they just finally pulled the trigger to put it out of its misery).

[themirokai]

Federal contract my company might get: You need to comply with the ADA.

Me: Cool. No problem.

Asshole CFO: Have we reviewed that?

Me: The… the Americans with Disabilities Act?

Asshole CFO: Yes. It’s part of the contract. We should review it.

Me: It’s longstanding federal law. We’re totally compliant with it.

Asshole CFO: How do you know if you haven’t reviewed it?

Me: Because I am generally familiar with its provisions and we pay an HR company to make sure our handbook complies with federal and state law.

Asshole CFO: The HR company says lots of stuff. I just think if something is in a contract we should review it.

Me: I agree with you generally but are you saying that I need to review every single federal statute?

Asshole CFO: I just think if something is in a contract we should review it.

Me: See, just saying that makes it sound like a reasonable thing. Having me actually review the entire ADA and the Clean Air Act and the Clean Water Act and the Wild and Scenic Rivers Act on top of the Federal Acquisition Requirements (which I *am* reviewing) is not reasonable.

Fml.