#the program featured like ten pages of warnings and explanations and shit

[psqqa]

okay but if we’re going to go with theatre major phoenix we need to go full fucking theatre major phoenix

like he shows up in germany the first time like “if there’s time for it i’d love to catch a show while i’m here, germany has such a vibrant theatre scene”.

and edgeworth's like “absolutely we can make that happen, i believe there’s a major schiller production running at the moment and it should have english surtitles”.

and phoenix is like “oh yeah no i’m sure it’s really solid but actually there’s a shakespeare production i’m interested in”.

edgeworth is like “okay odd choice for someone supposedly interested in the german theatre scene, but yeah who can say no to shakespeare". but they get there and it turns out it's this like peak weird experimental avant-garde german theatre production of coriolanus that’s set in a bdsm club. for like four hours edgeworth keeps looking over at phoenix like “what in the actual fuck is happening right now right now” but no matter what is happening onstage, phoenix just keeps watching it intently, finger pressed to his lips, the same pensive furrow to his brow that he gets in court when listening to testimony.

but afterwards when they're sipping their after-show aftercare tea in the lobby phoenix is waving his arms all over the place as he's like “SUCH an effective use of consent! the way they just continually wove it into everything. the almost brechtian emersion it created. the way it laid bare the underlying themes around consent of the governed. and then tying that in with the obvious angle of the performative masculinity of militarism and an audience that demands to be played to, and drawing the comparison between that and both bdsm AND theatre itself. an obvious comparison of course, but SO well done! just wow!"

and edgeworth who still hasn't quite managed to process anything beyond that first moment when coriolanus walked onstage in full leather daddy get-up and has a white-knuckled death grip on the after-show aftercare blanket wrapped around his shoulders just nods weakly and croaks out a vague “i'm glad you enjoyed it”

like he's gotta be into weird and experimental theatre. he can't have been a theatre major and NOT be into weird and experimental theatre. sure he'll go see the schiller production and enjoy it, but bdsm coriolanus is what gets his Theatre Kid blood pumping, y'know.

[writerly-love]

Misfits| 1

Genre: Crime AU, Fluff, ???

Pairing: Jimin x Reader

Word Count: 3,106

Summary: The plan was to go undercover and gain information on a notorious crime trio so he could help his team take them down. He wasn’t supposed to befriend them and he wasn’t supposed to fall in love with their mysterious hacker. Park Jimin was in trouble and it was all because of the Misfits.

A/N: I’m so bad at summaries but thanks for reading if you get past that! I haven’t posted anything in such a long time so I’m suuuuuuper nervous I hope this is okay sjdgkhjagsnkjsh this is the first part and a lot of introductions so I hope you forgive me if it was bad the next part will be better! I promise! *whispers* send me anons if you like it please I’m lonely

The room is filled with the elite, dressed to the nines and making connections with everyone they deem worthy. Standing among them is a wolf in sheep’s clothing who blends in with this crowd better than most with both his physical appearance and outfit looking as if he’s one of them as he sneaks his way into their world.

He whispers into the ears of the people, charming them with his words and pulling them in with his handsome features. They are none the wiser as to what his true intentions are as he seduces them and gets them right where he wants them.

Kim Taehyung was surrounded by members of this upper class, his bright boxy smile on display as he whispered into the ears of women and men alike things that made them laugh and blush and fawn over him. He was a master with words and could act just as well as anyone in movies.

On the other side of the room there was a figure who stayed to the background, dressed similarly to those serving the likes of people like Taehyung in the room. Sneaking about like a snake and disappearing into rooms he wasn’t supposed to be in. If he wasn’t disguised as a server his form would be intimidating, but draped in black and white attire with a bow tie his broad shoulders and pique physical form was hidden, making him as normal as anyone else.

His face was steely, not letting any emotion slip by as his eyes raked the room, searching for anything valuable he could slip off of anyone without their knowing. Occasionally he would disappear from the room without anyone the wiser to scope out the merchandise in the rest of the mansion before returning with an idea in mind of what he was to sneak in to steal later.

Jeon Jungkook was a master at not being seen and sinking into the background as he disappeared with a wallet or two in hand. He didn’t have to even say a word to someone before walking away with their possessions.

In the ear of both boys cleverly disguised as earrings were microphones. Every now and then a smooth voice would come through telling them clear instructions on where to go and who to talk to. Watching their every step, they were told where danger areas where and vague facts about the hosts and guests of the party.

The voice was from someone not even in the room, in fact this person was not too far away tucked safely in the back of a dark green “catering van”. It was close enough so that the bluetooth on the earrings would be able to pick up onto her signal clearly but still far enough away that it wouldn’t seem suspicious next to the other actual catering vehicles.

Surrounded by computer screens and dressed much more casual than your male partners sat [Y/N] [L/N], hands on a keyboard switching from camera to camera to get the best angles of the house to tell Jungkook where to go. On a farther screen you had a full visual of Taehyung and who he was talking to so you could feed him information he would need.

“Taehyung the lady to your right in the navy dress is an heiress and next week she’s hosting another party so get on her good side.”

Taking your words into account, Taehyung moved his attention to focus solely on the young heiress who was quickly flattered by his smooth words and enthralled by him.

The young woman in the van rolled her eyes at the sight, not quite understanding how Taehyung, of all people, could be so suave one moment and then the next he’d be in your personal bubble with his blocky glasses and hair in a mess.

Your eyes shifted to Jungkook, who was in view of the cameras in the kitchen. He was standing off to the side looking like he was taking a break, when he was actually waiting for your instruction. At that moment you started the second part of your mission, hacking and disabling the cameras and security system so Jungkook could do what he needed to do.

Fingers flying on the keys and eyes scanning code you did what you did best and quickly disabled everything you needed, the camera footage around you blacking out one by one as they went out. When you finished disabling the security you switched your communication system to connect with Jungkook’s in-ear.

“Okay Kookie, cameras and security are taken out, I don’t have eyes on you anymore so its up to you to get what we need. Good Luck!” You didn’t expect a response because he was on the job, but he hummed to let you know he heard you before going on about his business.

With that done you switched back over to Taehyung. “Tae, eyes are off and I need you to get information so I can get into her accounts.”

In the house Taehyung smoothly moved over to charm the hostess, his golden tongue weaving stories and compliments to catch her attention and once she was hooked he moved with her to another room to talk more personally. By doing this he managed to get information that would be part of most people’s simple passwords: birthdays, pet names, treasured family members. Taehyung was the best at weaseling information out of people easily and not letting them catch on.

Meanwhile, you hung onto every word spoken between Taehyung and the heiress and put together what could possibly be the combination of things she used for passwords. Of course this didn’t always work and usually you would have to depend on whatever Jungkook ended up getting at the end of the night, but when it did you were easily able to dip into her bank accounts and take an amount that would be beneficial to the three of you, but barely noticeable for someone that had such a large amount coming in weekly.

Once that was done your job was nearly complete, you just needed to wait until the end of the night to meet up with your associates.

You straightened from your position over the keyboard and stretched your arms above you. Idly, you wondered what Taehyung and Jungkook were going to decide to pick up for a late dinner.

“This is the third time this week we’ve had Chinese food can we please eat something else? Anything else?” You groaned when the two boys entered your underground abode carrying two familiar looking take out bags.

“I had a coupon.” Jungkook offers, placing the bag in his hands on the table and taking out the contents.

You rolled your eyes at his explanation. “A coupon? The two of you get to eat fancy pastas and seafood and steak every night and what do I get? Fried rice for a week!”

“You love fried rice though. Didn’t you say once that you would eat it everyday if you could?” Taehyung teased as he bit into an egg roll.

You gave him a bitter look and grab a container to start eating. “I said that when we were ten that doesn’t count!”

“Okay so we made your childhood dream come true!”

“Shut up Tae.”

Jungkook laughs through a mouthful of noodles and Tae smiles as he reaches over to ruffle your hair. “Don’t get upset Cutie, we’ll get you something better next time okay?”

“Yeah! I think I have a coupon for that chicken place you like.” Jungkook pipes in with a mischievous smile and you go to swat at him but he dodges swiftly and sticks his tongue out at you.

“You guys don’t know how lucky you are,” You pouted and returned to what you were eating, “If I was able to go to those snobby parties I would eat so many hors d'oeuvres.”

Jungkook hummed and stole a piece of broccoli from you. “Next time I’ll sneak some out to bring to you.”

You smiled and leaned over the table to to pinch his cheeks. “Aw, Jungkookie really does care about me! This is why you’re my favorite.”

“Hey!” Tae straightened and looked over at the two of you with a pout.

Laughing, you went to tease him when loud beep alerted you and turned your attention to your desk, where your biggest monitor displayed a large red exclamation point in warning. You had programmed your computer for certain warnings and you knew exactly what that means.

“Someone’s trying to hack our system.” You jump up from your seat at the table to go sit in your computer chair and immediately your fingers started running across the keys and your eyes scanned each set of code that went up the screen. Tae and -Jungkook have saddled up to sit behind you and although they don’t know exactly what you’re doing they’re curious to see how everything goes down.

Within thirty minutes you’ve fought the attacker off and are trying to figure out a way to track down whoever it was that knew how to get into your defenses.

“Shit,” you curse when it’s finally revealed to you, “Its the cops.”

Jungkook and Taehyung share glances behind your back and you spin around in your chair to face them. For a moment the three of you are silent, mulling over things in your head before Taehyung breaks the silence.

“I guess that means its time to go.”

“Fuck!”

Min Yoongi curses and slams his hands on the table in frustration. He was kicked out before he could get a even a bit of information. Whoever their hacker was had talent and it pissed him off.

“Shit.” Someone sighs from behind him, Kim Namjoon runs a hand over his face. Now that yoongi failed to hack into their systems correctly whoever it was behind this now knew that they were being investigated. “I’m gonna call for a meeting.”

He stalks out of Yoongi’s office and down the hall to a bigger meeting room where he pages for the other members of his unit.

Kim Seokjin walks in and sees the defeated look on Namjoon’s face and starts setting up so they can start talking and brainstorming on what to do. He starts writing on a whiteboard about what they already knew about who these people where and what exactly they have been doing. “Something bad must’ve happened, thats the same look you had that time Jimin spilled coffee all over your desk and your pants.”

“I would’ve preferred if he did.”

“Really? Last time we had to reprint so many documents and you had to get new pants.”

“You’re right I don’t want to smell like coffee all day again.”

Jung Hoseok walks into the room with his usual smile and bright demeanor, even when he sees the frown on Namjoon’s face. “Uh oh you look like you’re on your third cup of coffee, what happened?”

“Why is everyone talking about coffee suddenly?”

“Because you and Yoongi drink coffee like its water.”

“Well it does have water in it..”

Yoongi walked in soon after, holding a freshly brewed cup of coffee proving Hoseok’s point and making the man laugh. Yoongi looked at him curiously before deciding not to ask questions and taking a seat.

Finally, the newest recruit entered. Park Jimin has been part of the police force for about a year and a half now but has just recently joined this division a few weeks ago. This was his first case and he was determined to do what he could and do it well, despite being known so far as the cute but clumsy one of the bunch.

Four men sat around the large table that faces a whiteboard and Namjoon stood by, ready to deliver the news. “So, our plan to infiltrate and get their information through hacking has failed and now I’m afraid they know someone is after them, I’m hoping they don’t know its us, but with their skill I’m sure they do. So now its time to regroup and decide on a new plan.”

He motioned to the whiteboard where the little information they do know about the group is written. “So to reiterate what we know of these suspects: V, JK, and their unidentified third party who is their tech specialist.”

“V is the socializer, we often see him as the face in parties talking specifically to hosts, while JK is the shadow in the background we don’t know exactly what he does but from what we’ve seen and heard, it is very likely he is the one stealing items.”

“Finally the unknown hacker of the group that we know close to nothing about but we know they’re extremely skilled, so skilled in fact that they’ve completely erased and created new backgrounds for both V and JK so we have no clue who they really are other than the fact that they’re in their early 20s, which appears to be true.”

As he finished up the review he turns back to the other men, looking around the table to see if they have any questions.

Its silent for a second as the group mulls over the information, and Hoseok speaks up. “So, what do we do now boss, since our first attempt failed?”

Namjoon sighs and bites his lip. “Well that is what we’re going to discuss. We have very bare minimum information on the suspects and I think it would be in our best interest to find out more.”

“Is all of their information we found on their backgrounds really fabricated?” Jin asked, shocked that it was possible to completely erase someone’s identity and create something completely new.

Yoongi nodded, crossing his arms over his chest. “I looked for hours and all I could get was an obviously fake social media pages for V and resumes for JK that were sent to catering companies. When we questioned the companies all they had to say about him was that he was a very good but quiet worker, and everyone that V has talked to knows very little about who he really is.”

“They’re like ghosts?” Jimin mumbled from his spot where he was diligently taking notes.

“So the plan I’m offering is that we send in a spy.” Namjoon suggests.

Everyone in the room perks at the suggestion and he takes that as a sign to elaborate. “So, we need someone to try and get more information out of the subjects about who they are and where the third accomplice is, and also to gather enough evidence so we can make arrests. The best way to do this is introduce a spy into the group of wealthy socialites they usually target.”

“So who would you want to be the spy?” Hoseok asks.

“That is something we need to discuss as well. Would anyone want to volunteer?”

Immediately a hand went up, and four pairs of eyes turned to Jimin who had a determined look on his face, puffy lips pressed together and eyes sharp. “I’ll do it.”

“You? You want to do this? Are you sure?” Jin started uneasily, he didn’t want to completely shut down the younger man’s decision but in his head he really couldn’t see him as the one to do this.

Jimin nodded firmly. “I have the abilities to be able to infiltrate easily. I’m around their age range and attractive enough to be able to draw their attention.”

“Are you calling us old?”

Jin leans back in fake shock, hand on his chest as if he had been terribly insulted.  

The younger man shrugged. “You are….older than me….and the suspects.”

Jin gasps and looks around at his other coworkers who manage to avoid his eyes by looking away, but Hoseok was the only one who openly laughed at his dramatic ways.

He turns his attention back to Jimin and opens his mouth to speak, but Namjoon beats him to it, “Jimin, you’re still pretty new at everything here, and you lack in experience when it comes to being in the field so are you sure you would be up to doing something like this?”

Truthfully Namjoon had someone like Hoseok in mind, he had boundless charisma and had experience being undercover before so it made sense to send him in compared to Jimin who was known to be a little clumsy and had no experience whatsoever being undercover.

At the leader’s question Jimin starts to stutter. He didn’t expect Namjoon to question him like this he actually thought volunteering was a good thing. Maybe he really should rethink this whole thing, taking on this job might be a little over his head after all…

“Actually Namjoon,” Yoongi starts. “I think Jimin would be great for this job, he might be a bit inexperienced but that also means he is unknown to anyone that might be familiar to other people we’ve had in the field before. If the suspects have any connections to other criminals who know us they might not know Jimin.”

Jimin couldn’t believe Yoongi out of all people in the room was defending him, as he usually was quieter towards the younger man and until today he didn’t think that Yoongi even knew his first name.

“That is actually a very good point! And I think our Jimin can do it! He’s a really hard worker and when he puts his mind to something he does it very well.” Hoseok includes and Jimin almost wants to cry at the praise.

Namjoon sits quietly for a moment, taking this into account before nodding and looking directly at Jimin. “Okay if Hoseok and Yoongi think you can then I’ll have faith in you as well. Next week theres going to be a benefit dinner and we’re sure the suspects are going to pop up there to try and find their next target. We’ll have to have you ready to go in by then and start gaining their trust and information okay?”

Jimin smiles brightly and nods at the leader, who can’t help but return the smile. “Yes! Okay! Thank you so much for trusting me with this I promise I’ll do all I can so we can finally take these guys down!”

The rest of the men in the room laugh at his eagerness and Hoseok reaches over to ruffle his hair. Namjoon looks over fondly at the younger officer before clearing his throat to gather the attention in the room and announce what they should do now.

“So, the next assignment is to create a new identity for our Jimin.”

A/N: In the next part Jimin and the m/c will meet! I can’t wait!