#the poor wooper is so cute and asdfghjkl just imagining dazai having his little army of pokemon in bandages

[anticidic]

It's thanks to @hintabutbsd that I couldn't get these images out of my head and now I'm like...pokémon trainer AU, but very specifically 15!skk

Dazai learns to patch up his pokémon himself when in a pinch, and he'll feed them berries and spray potions on their wounds because Yokohama has its fair share of sketchy Pokémon Centers that he doesn't trust the same way he doesn't trust people to patch him up and tend to his wounds. So his pokémon are sometimes wandering around covered in bandages themselves and the first time Chuuya sees Dazai's Wooper, he has half a mind to snatch the thing up and bring it to a proper Pokémon Center for treatment.

His crimes include snatching berries from the trees of berry growers and inappropriately using the HM Surf to cross waters where pokémon surfing is illegal in the bay (he does it cut down time but also to get away from Chuuya when he pulls his pranks, forgetting Chuuya has a pokémon that can fly and Dazai's sometimes just been...snatched up in the claws of a talonflame and flown back to headquarters)

He busts those medicinal shops that sell the super bitter herbs that pokémon hate like revival herbs, energy roots, and heal powders. And force feeds them to his enemies instead

He's been holding off on evolving his Wooper for years because he found the poor thing all alone in an alley battered and surrounded by trashcans and dumpsters where it didn't belong, looking a little scared as thunder struck. Wooper shouldn't be alone but he didn't know what else to do other than take it in himself and patch it up. Then it refused to leave his side. And now he might have a tiny soft spot for it.

He also likes using Chuuya's pokémon because of his own laziness. Sometimes Chuuya will walk in to his arcanine starting a little fire for Dazai to keep warm because he can't stand the cold—and has half a mind to tell Dazai to cut it out and catch his own fire types if he wants one so bad, but might have a SMALL change of heart because his arcanine-then-growlithe used to do the same for him and the Sheep when they were in the slums)

Or he'll get the great idea of taking it for a ride across the city so he can catch up to Chuuya who's speeding on his motorcycle.

Dazai tries to goad people into touching his Wooper because it secretes a deadly poison, and Chuuya threatens him every time he does it.