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sshbpodcast · 1 year ago

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Character Spotlight: William Riker

By Ames

A Star to Steer Her By is continuing on our diplomatic conference Who’s Who in Starfleet with the Enterprise-D’s bearded dynamo, Commander William T. Riker. He’s The Next Generation’s answer to the Captain Kirk character, but with possibly more manwhoring around and he leaves the actual leadership to Captain Picard. Ya know, so he can do more manwhoring!

But of course, Will Riker is so much more than a pretty beard. So swing your leg over the back of that chair and have a seat as we focus on Picard’s number one (and we don’t mean the dog). Some of our favorite and least favorite Riker moments are outlined below and you can listen to this week’s podcast episode (jump to 1:05:52) for the full discussion. Shields up! Rrrrrrred alert!

[Images © CBS/Paramount]

Best moments

Guess I’ll go eat worms Whoops, I was wrong on the podcast when I said Riker ate the mealworms in “Conspiracy” (I was probably thinking of the next item on this list); he’s about to take a big bite before he turns the tables on the baddies. But he still does get to pretend to be mind-controlled by the bug monster, infiltrate the admirals’ dinner, and then utterly explode Remmick and the queen bug!

Gagh is always best when served live Now in “A Matter of Honor,” Riker does get to eat some gagh when he’s on the officer exchange program with the Klingon ship. And he really takes charge while he’s serving aboard the IKS Pagh, punching the biggest brute in the room, making eyes at all their women, and challenging Captain Kargan all while upholding Klingon customs to a T.

Pinocchio is broken. Its strings have been cut. Ignoring that Phillipa Louvois put Riker in a situation that could have been avoided if they had an actual attorney represent Bruce Maddox in Data’s sapience trial in “The Measure of a Man,” Riker actually does a pretty good job lawyering. But what really does well for his character is the final scene where he is lamenting how close he got to getting Data dissected, and that’s lovely.

The illegal move, hachidan kiritsu We discussed a little bit how shitty a father Kyle Riker was to Will in our Parents blogpost, but we’ve got to give the younger Riker some credit for figuring out that daddy has been cheating him for years and years in anbo-jyutsu in “The Icarus Factor,” overcoming the influence that he’s had over his life, and making the decision for himself to stay on the Enterprise.

Mr. Worf, fire Not only does “The Best of Both Worlds” introduce us to Picard as Locutus, in all his glory and defeat, but we also finally get a taste of what Riker would be like as a captain. He’s been dodging getting his own ship for years now, and it’s rather surprising since we see that he can make the difficult decisions when he needs to, in this case firing on his own Borgified captain.

You don't have to be alone anymore We also see in several episodes on our list that Riker tends to get abducted an awful lot, and he figures out the respective ruses pretty smartly! In this case, in “Future Imperfect,” there’s practically a multi-part escape room for him to solve, and at the center of it is an abandoned young orphan who was one of the better children we discussed in our Kiddos post!

Star Trek says LGBTQ rights! You’ll see when you move on to our naughty Riker moments that a lot of his shitty relationships made the cut, but an actually meaningful and progressive relationship comes out of “The Outcast.” It was very moving watching Riker stand up for Soren, the J'naii scientist who just wanted to express the gender she identified as, which makes the episode’s resolution all the more heartbreaking.

Computer, create table Don’t worry, this won’t be the last time Riker gets abducted by aliens and deduces his way out of the problem. In “Schisms,” many crewmembers have been getting stolen away and experimented upon in their sleep, but Riker (with help from the holodeck’s renowned table program) goes in mostly conscious, saves a crewmember, and escapes. Now it’s time for a well-deserved nap!

Don't let them tell you you're crazy We have one final alien abduction in this list because we have to include the absolutely phenomenal “Frame of Mind”! Jonathan Frakes acts his ass off in this mindfuck of an episode, alternating between screaming about hallucinating things to actually hallucinating things. When he finally figures out that he’s being experimented upon yet again, it feels like a triumph.

Play “Night Bird”! For all intents and purposes, Tom Riker is the same entity as Will Riker, so we’ll include his great moment in this list as well! We’ve got to give him credit in “Second Chances” for staying sane while abandoned for eight years on Nervala IV, which is a feat unto itself. So it’s just gravy that he also finally mastered playing “Night Bird” on the trombone and creating some fine phaser art!

I think the resemblance is rather striking We’ve got a couple of moments from “The Pegasus” to recount to you, on both batches of lists, so let’s start off with how cute it was for Riker to be so into celebrating Captain Picard Day! It’s just a delightful little exchange that shows the admiration that the first officer has for his captain. Imagine how fun Commander Riker Day must be!

It was wrong twelve years ago, and it is wrong today Riker impresses us throughout the rest of “The Pegasus” by turning against one of Jake’s Corrupt Admirals, Eric Pressman, who is planning on using a phased cloaking device, utterly violating the Treaty of Algeron. It’s a great little character arc watching Riker’s guilt trip from having taken Pressman’s side years go to watching him defy orders to be on the side of what’s right!

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Worst moments

If you liked it then you shoulda put a ring on it The Troi-Riker relationship throughout a lot of TNG was a bit confused and inconsistent, especially in the early episode “Haven” when Troi’s arranged marriage pops up. Riker is suddenly super jealous all episode long, moping about, whining at Troi, being mean to Wyatt, the works. Dude, you had your chance. And dude, she’s not pleased about it either! Chill out!

Taking mansplaining to another level Have we ever had a take on a matriarchal planet that wasn’t just plain sexist? That’s definitely on display in “Angel One” when all the Elected One of the society needs to see the errors of her people’s ways is for Riker to swoop in, take her to bed, and then have him take charge in that manly way of his. Why couldn’t this have been a job for Troi? Or Bev? Or Yar?

I don’t mean to be indelicate. But who’s the father?! Speaking of Troi (but not Yar because she was dead by this point), that weird relationship between Imzadis gets weirder in “The Child” when Troi gets knocked up by a lightning bug. And Riker, in full crazy ex-boyfriend mode, gets on her case about who the father is, and then starts trying to make decisions for Troi about the fate of her child.

You can't make an omelet without breaking a few eggs This is just a small detail we like to harp on, and that’s that Riker is supposedly making omelets for everyone at the top of “Time Squared” but what he actually makes are scrambled eggs. And not even good scrambled eggs! And evidently his cooking never gets better later in life, as we’re forced to watch him burn a pizza in “Nepenthe” in the series Picard as well!

One William Riker is unique, perhaps even special Oh boy, we’ve already talked a little bit about how problematic “Up the Long Ladder” is in our Picard post, but it’s more messed up than that. The Mariposans end up stealing DNA from Riker and Pulaski, and Riker is so enraged by this that he murders the clones that are created without any discussion first. Pretty much everything about this episode is a travesty though.

Always look before you leap I just think this one’s kinda funny but worth including if only for how dumb it is that Riker gets snared by some kind of trap Kevin Uxbridge set in “The Survivors.” A dangling Will Riker is just so goofy and ridiculous that I wanted to rewatch that scene a couple of times to laugh at what a buffoon this scene made of him.

I've always wanted to make love with an alien So it’s pretty much implied that Riker bangs Lanel in the episode “First Contact” (not to be confused with the movie First Contact), right? I’ve said it to Nicolai Rozhenko and I’ll say it again: No sleeping with primitive people you’re observing while under cover, no matter the circumstances! No matter how thirsty she is! No matter what she’s offering in return! No!

You will follow Starfleet uniform code aboard this ship, Ensign You rarely see hardass Riker come out and it’s really inconsistent when he does. So it practically comes out of nowhere when he suddenly orders Ro to take out her Bajoran earring in “Ensign Ro” even though it’s a part of her culture. No one makes Worf take off his baldric. And it’s not until Captain Jellico demands it that Troi has to get out of her damn pajamas.

Let's drop the ranks for a moment Speaking of my man Jellico! Riker not only acts insubordinate to Picard’s replacement during “Chain of Command,” he just comes off as a whiny little bitch the whole time because Jellico does this differently than Picard. And Jellico has to come begging this petulant brat to pilot a shuttlecraft. Do your damn job, Riker. You’d never act like this to Picard.

Mutiny on the Pegasus On the flip side, Riker had no problem following orders like a little sheep when he served with Pressman. Sure, he makes up for it later as we described above in “The Pegasus,” but first Riker sided with the obviously wrong and dangerous Captain Pressman, effectively sentencing every mutineer on the ship to a horrible death. Grapple with that, Riker. Oh, you already did.

Smooth as an android's bottom It’d be kind to just call Insurrection extremely uneven. On the one hand, we get great speechifying from Picard, as we mentioned last week. But on the other hand, the fountain of youth jokes and the failure to explore whatever the hell was happening with time are just as groan inducing as watching Riker shave off his magnificent beard because he was feeling horny.

Full-beard Riker > Goatee Riker Because we’ve already decided Tom Riker is fair game, let’s give the transporter duplicate a little bit of guff when he appears in the Deep Space Nine episode “Defiant.” Just… what the hell was his plan? Steal the Defiant for the Maquis… and then what? Kill Kira? Kiss Kira? Make up your damn mind! I’m glad this idiot is stuck in the Cardassian mines for life.

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It’s time to put our trombones away now until the next time someone requests a recital of “Night Bird.” Join us next week as we have more TNG crewmembers to analyze, specifically the fan favorite yellow-eyed android of the show. We’re also still fighting our way through Enterprise over on the podcast side of things, so keep up with our warp-five watch through over on SoundCloud or your favorite podthing, beam on over to Facebook and Twitter, and toot toot toot!

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