#the painting is called blue dress but i cant find the artist

[diioonysus]

fans + art

[lue-arlert]

luella !!! so so happy for you making it to 100 !! cant wait to see more of your work from here on out hehe :)

i would love to participate in your event !!! id want my first date to be with sweet armin, i dont mind if you include a lil bit of nsfw in there 😈😈 and i am not a sugar baby !

thank u so so much cutie <3

Honey!!! Hello!!! Thank you so much, I hope you have a good time painting with Armin!!!

WC: 1.2k

18+ minors and ageless blogs do not interact

You were excited for your date. There wasn’t any need to dress up fancy, no need to make yourself smelling all pretty and have your hair done up.

All you needed was a cute scrunchy, your paint-covered overalls, and comfy shoes.

You were set to meet him—Armin Arlert, delicate and beautiful Armin Arlert—at a nearby river with your easel and art supplies, where you would have your first date, painting together and exchanging your favorite teas.

You met him in a record store. He was flipping through some albums, searching for a band you’d never heard of, when he caught you gazing at him and his beautiful, fluffy blond hair.

It was an awkward introduction. You hadn’t meant to stare, but you were so enamored with how breathtaking he looked in his pale blue flannel and fitted khakis, silver studs in his ears, a ring on his pinky finger, that you just couldn’t stop yourself.

He’d asked you for help finding the album, assuming you’d worked there from the way you watched him. You embarrassingly had to tell him that you did not work there, and unfortunately had never heard of this artist, but if he told you what genre they were, you might be able to suggest other musicians.

This led to an hour-long discussion of music and art, the latter becoming a subject of interest when you commented on the album cover artwork of a handful of different bands.

Turns out, you both love music and painting.

And now you were here, on your way to meet up with him, a wide grin over your lips.

You’d packed some snacks, knowing you’d be there a good while.

The weather was perfect for your outing. The sun was blanketed by passing clouds, but there wasn’t any kind of gray overcast, and there was a gentle enough breeze that your ponytail would billow around your neck just the slightest.

He greeted you as you approached him where he sat by the river, a blanket beneath him and some snack boxes of his own at his side.

You greeted each other and then you set up your station across from him, spreading your paint and cups and brushes off to your side over your own blanket.

As you painted, you held gentle conversation, giggling together and telling stories about your childhood, exchanging the different kinds of art projects you had in school as kids, recalling every piece in great detail.

Your eyes constantly wandered to each other over your easels, making contact as smiles took over your lips before you turned back to your artwork.

Armin had decided to put some music on from his phone and explained to you that this was the artist he was searching for in the record shop.

It was catchy, you admitted to that. You’d never heard their music, but found yourself enjoying it as he sang along, you yourself rocking side to side as you pretended to mumble the lyrics you weren’t familiar with.

Time went on, the sun still in the sky to provide ample lighting for your paintings, and you called out to Armin that you had finished, but would not show him your work until he was done.

He panicked slightly, and it was adorable the way he dedicated himself to finishing his painting, too eager to show you his work.

As you waited for him, you took in the sounds of nature around you, relishing in the breeze and the singing birds and the trickling water to your side, the scent of flowers and grass overwhelming your nostrils.

He thought you were beautiful. He couldn’t keep his eyes off of you, the way your hair flowed against the back of your head, the way you carried your shoulders, the curve of your back, the way you sat cross-legged on your blanket and picked at the sole of your shoe.

His heart fluttered every time you looked at him and he never wanted that feeling to go away. You were perfect for him. So perfect, you were the subject of his painting, his muse in the flowers, as you sat across from him behind your easel.

Armin was finally ready to show you his masterpiece (you), and on the count of three, you each turned your canvases, jaws dropping at the other’s painting.

He was surprised to find that you painted him, just as he painted you. Your choice in pastels complimented his appearance, your art style capturing his gentleness.

Moving over to your blanket, he sat beside you and you each looked over your artwork, pointing out little details you each liked about the other’s work.

In the midst of your praisings, his lips found their way to yours, capturing you in the most scrumptious kiss you’d ever had the pleasure of experiencing.

He was soft, his touches like feathers over your face and arms, so warm against you as he pulled you ever closer, his fingers finding their way behind your ears and in your hair as he cupped your face, deepening the kiss, slowly lowering you to your back.

It didn’t take long for your hands to begin exploring each other, slowly and sensually, knuckles grazing skin, and soon the straps of your overalls were popped open, the denim being wiggled down your body.

You helped Armin remove the heavy garment, sliding your feet out from the legs to expose your bare thighs and soft pink lace panties.

His kisses trailed down your body, kissing your chest through your shirt as he carefully groped you.

Your moans blended in with the flowing river while his lips danced over your belly, his soft hand pushing your shirt up to expose the flesh as he grew closer to your warmth.

Then his mouth pressed against your folds through your panties, kissing and nipping to make you whine.

Between his saliva and your slick, the lace was good and damp, and he brought his fingers to you to hook into the fabric and pull it aside, your dripping cunt now fully exposed to him.

He licked his lips hungrily and quickly dove in, his tongue slotting between your lips and lapping at you like he’d never drunk anything so sweet in his life.

Your fingers laced through his hair as your back arched, his name rolling off your tongue while he slurped at you, closing his mouth around your clit.

His attention to your body sent you reeling with pleasure, goosebumps over your skin, toes curling, moans drifting from your throat.

He licked from your hole to your clit, over and over, flattening his tongue, using the tip to barely graze you, swishing it side to side to taste every inch of you.

The longer he ate you, the more your orgasm built up, and from the way your hands shook over his scalp and your hips trembled within his grasp, he knew you were about to release.

With a final suck and lap at your clit, he was able to grin widely against your sopping skin as you came around his tongue, your voice sounding like angels singing from above as you whined and moaned his name again and again like he was your favorite song.

Lue Arlert’s 100 Followers First Date Event - CLOSED

[alysemeadfad]

𝕽𝖊𝖇𝖊𝖑𝖑𝖎𝖔𝖓

Most would say its easy for a teenager to rebel at any point in time, but I find it hard to rebel in any way, most teens get tattoos, piercings, cut and dye their hair to rebel against their parents, but growing up with a mom who is tattooed, hair in fun dyed styles and piercings, I’m really just following in her footsteps she practically encourages. 

The only thing I rebel against is tidying my room and making cups of tea, cant really say I could start a world changing rebellion on that.

Rebellions i find important

1903–18 — Women’s Suffrage Movement The foundation of the Women’s Social and Political Union by Emmeline Pankhurst in 1903 began a more militant phase of the call for votes for women, which had been growing through the end of the 19th century. The Suffragettes used militant tactics like vandalism, arson, bombing and hunger strikes, with one member committing public suicide by throwing herself under the King’s horse at a race in 1913. The movement was wound up when some women were enfranchised in the 1918 Representation of the People Act, before all women over 21 were given the vote in 1928.

Suffragette Vera Wentworth in 1909, and the dress by Vaquera that it inspired

Stonewall riots 28 Jun 1969 – 3 Jul 1969 The Stonewall riots were a series of spontaneous demonstrations by members of the gay community in response to a police raid that began in the early morning hours of June 28, 1969, at the Stonewall Inn in the Greenwich Village neighborhood of Manhattan, New York City.

It is said that Marsha P. Johnson was the one who started the rebellion. Supposedly, throughout the bustle of the raid, Marsha threw a shot glass into a mirror and shouted, ” I got my civil rights!”.  With this inspiration and resistance against the police, other patrons began to follow.

Present day- Me Too movement.The Me Too movement, with variations of related local or international names, is a social movement against sexual abuse and sexual harassment towards women, where people publicize allegations of sex crimes.

The Punk Rebellion

the punk involved no protests or riots, it impacted people, fashion, music, society and everything to be honest.

The punk subculture advocates a do-it-yourself (DIY) ethic. During the subculture's infancy members were almost all from a lower economic class, and had become tired of the affluence that was associated with popular rock music at the time. Punks would publish their own music or sign with small independent labels, in hopes to combat what they saw as a money hungry music industry. The DIY ethic is still popular with punks.ideology's of punks

Ideology

Punk political ideologies are mostly concerned with individual freedom and anti-establishment views. Common punk viewpoints include individual liberty, anti-authoritarianism, a DIY ethic, non-conformity, anti-collectivism, anti-corporatism, anti-government, direct action and not "selling out".

Some groups and individuals that self-identify as being a part of punk subculture hold right-wing views. The belief that such views are opposed to the original ethos of the punk subculture, and its history, has led to internal conflicts and an active push against such views being considered part of punk subculture at all. Two examples of this are an incident during the 2016 American Music Awards, where the band Green Day chanted anti-conservative, anti-racist, and anti-fascist messages, and an incident at a show by the Dropkick Murphys, when bassist and singer Ken Casey, tackled an individual for giving a nazi-style salute and later stated that nazis are not welcome at a Dropkick Murphys show. Band member Tim Brennan later reaffirmed this sentiment. The song "Nazi Punks Fuck Off" by hardcore punk band Dead Kennedys has come to be considered an anti-nazi anthem.

VIV WESTWOOD

Rejecting the hippie ethos that was fashionable towards the end of the 1960s, Westwood and McLaren created clothes that referenced youth culture's recent past, selling rock'n'roll fashion in a shop unit at 430 King's Road in Chelsea. In 1974, the shop took on its most notorious identity: SEX, with Westwood and McLaren designing fetish wear that they sold to prostitutes, those with 'underground' sexual tastes, and young proto-punks brave enough to take a seriously edgy look out onto the street. The pair enjoyed shocking people, designing garments and shoes that referenced 'deviant' sexual practices, including rubber dresses and stilettos bristling with spikes.

How punk influenced me, because it influenced the world

My take on rebellion

Westwood inspired tights.

after watching a documentary on vivien westwood and the birth of the punk revolution i created some westwood inspired tights as a little spontaneous brainstorm, did not develop any further on the tights.

i used a pair of brand new white tights and put holes all in them, this is non conformist as if a regular pair of tights had a hole you would bin them as they were no good any more, but purposely putting holes in is quite rebellious in that aspect, i used sharpies to draw triggering symbols and words such as a swastikka and ‘punk fag’ .

crayon drawings

i used crayons to create these images as i thought it was a more rebellious medium and its created for kids so that is non conforming and it gives a rough diy finish look making it look slightly unfinished

i created a lesbian nun, this was a spur of the mind thought whats socially good and respected? a nun? whats the opposite of what a nun preaches, homo behavior. 

here i did a little barbie series drawing from observational on one and on another from mind and another from an image which i created by burning a barbie ehich is quite a rebellious act in a way. 

Collages

i decided to do some collages as its a way of just slapping ideas out in a visual format, my first one was using a fashion magazine and i realized this was the way to go so i printed some punk imagery and even used my own crayon drawings to create more collages.

photo shop

i wanted to mess with these collages more on a digital format so i put them in to photo shop to play with them and generate more ideas this was giving me a poster vibe which reminded me of punk posters.

 Final ideas

i used images from the new york trip to create a vision on photo shop, using a light of the american flag,sign posts, bins with posters on them.a clip art image of a chain and lock,street art and stickers i saw on poles in the street which is another form or street art which is quite rebellious as its not socially acceptable to vandalize and graffiti on public areas.

i took a few elements from the last board and included them in this vision board, i really wanted the main focus to be on the pipe that says “the rich killed nyc” i feel like it has a deep meaning behind it and it is quite rebellious as it reminded me of the punk rebellion in the uk as it was mostly lower class working people who used art, music and fashion to rebel against society and social constructs and actively non conform to the “rules” in a way. i also used a sticker that says jesus loves you and i crossed it out and wrote hate you over the loves you part as that is fitting to my rebellious visions.

in this board i again used “ the rich killed nyc” pipe as that’s my main surrounding element, i uses another pole with stickers on though you cant really tell what the stickers are, it just fits the aesthetic. i used a statue of liberty as she is known as a symbol of freedom, and along side it i used a photo of a photograph i saw in the modern art museum where this person had dyke tattooed on their neck which is a derogatory word to gay women, and that’s quite rebellious to take a bad word and own it by tattooing it on your body .

in this board i moved away from “the rich killed nyc” pipe as i felt i needed to come away from that one element for one board and to broaden my ideas. in this one i used a sky line image i took when on the ferry to liberty island, i changed the colour to black and white as the original colours of the image are quite blue and orangy, i used a sign post that says one way as it for some reason reminded me of like “one way to hell” or something and that there feels like there is no choice or individuality in the phrase “one way” . i used text over the sky line that says “the rotten apple” as new york city is known as the big apple and i thought, when i was there it did not remind me of a big fresh beautiful apple as the homeless people on the streets and the graffiti that has no artistic intent, so it was more of a rotten apple in a way. i used an image of the american flag i took on liberty island as i used an image of an american flag light, so i thought i could link back to that idea and use an actual flag, as its to represent freedom. i also used a art piece from the modern art gallery which was just a male mannequin wearing a bra which does not fit the social constrict of what men should wear there for its quite rebellious and opposite to the one way system. 

in my final board i included the american flag, a chain over it completely doing the opposite of what the flag means which is freedom, i used the bun that says don’t be afraid of anyone with an edited red paint drip on it which kind of looks like blood, i used text that says “ the rich killed nyc” as i loved that phrase bit i over used the pole in the other boards and i liked that my main message is that the rich killed nyc, i used an image of my dr martens that i took while my feet were up against a pole as i sat on a tube, showing anti social behavior basically which is stereo typically rebellious,and also dr martens were quite fashionable in the uk punk rebellion so i’m hinting to my idea that was inspired by the uk punk rebellion, and finally i have a set of traffic lights which are about order and control, the light is also on red which signifies danger, and the word stop which fits to my idea.

[diamondcamefromhell]

Timeless love

Jaskier x Female Reader series  part 1

[again a reupload because the first time, tags decided to not work, fun times ~] [ reuplaod x2 POOPDIE DOOBTIE tags just dont want to work these days, do they]

Summary: This is an AU, where Y/N is a young woman, trying to make ends meet with her freelancing writing job. She lives in her small Nottingham studio apartment along with her cat Apollo. Things change when one evening as she is waiting for her taxi, she meets what she thinks is Joey Batey, but the man in front of her is convinced he’s Jaskier, a character from her current favorite show. Y/N now has to figure out what to do.

Warnings: Swearing

Word count: 1,413

Note:

This is just an intro kind of thing, setting the setting (wow, great wording me) and Y/N first meets Jaskier. I had this idea at work, and I really want to write it, I know it may not be everyone’s cup of tea, but if you find it interesting, you can ask to be added to a tag list! Other parts will be longer, posted every two days. I will continue doing other random imagines as requests are still open, but this will be a multi-part thing going on.

ALL feedback is appreciated. You can leave it anonymously on my ask page.

ENJOY! xxx

I click off Netflix, with a warmth filling my heart. I just finished rewatching The Witcher for a second time already. I get up to clean my room, gently humming Toss a Coin to Your Witcher to myself. I live a small studio apartment, a struggling artist is what I should call myself.

I specialize is writing, and as a freelance worker, I get to do works on anything, from how to grow your peas to why foot fetish is good for your health. A weird bunch of people come to me, influencers preaching nonsense. What I truly enjoy, however, is poetry. Writing art, not whatever people bark at me.

But I have to make a living. I made a promise to the stars I would make it on my own.

I glance back at my laptop. I enjoy my days off, treating myself to fine shows like The Witcher. I go play the song I was humming, and it fills my apartment, as I clean the kitchen counters and do the dishes. I decide that I might go out tonight, I need a break from this small room. I need to breathe.

I have this sense of adventure, wanting to do something - anything. Watching people go on adventures for eight hours straight makes my life seem so boring and bland. Much like Jaskier, I wanted to be heard. I wanted someone I could write about, and the world would be forced to listen. The world couldn’t help but fall in love, too.

Hours pass by, as I begin to get ready, applying gentle makeup on my face. I throw on a flowy skater style dress, that’s pale blue. I smirk remembering Jaskier wore pale blue, and then cuss myself out for getting so enticed in fictional character. I can fall for someone who isn’t real, not again. I’ve been the girl with a helpless crush on many characters.

Won’t happen again. I am content with being single. Plus, I have my cat. I glance around my apartment, looking for Apollo, my ginger boy I named after my favourite Greek God. I see him on a windowsill, staring out into the world. My beautiful boy. Roach to my Geralt.

“Be good tonight, Apollo.” I say, but the cat pays little to no attention to me. “Mommy will head out.”

I let out a sigh when Apollo doesn’t even look at me. Being a cat mom, you get used to it, but I prefer it when he’s in his happy mood. Then, I can’t get him off me. I whistle, making him look at me. His green eyes scan me, as if asking why I dared to disturb him.

“Keep our home safe, okay?” To my surprise, he meows in response, before looking out the window again.

This cat never ceases to amaze me.

I make sure to leave enough food and water for him, before I leave the apartment. The smell in the corridor makes my nose physically hurt, and I wonder if Dave, my neighbour, is passed out drunk somewhere again. I sigh, rushing from my third floor, to get relief of fresh air.

The streets are dim, but not too dark. I clutch my purse tighter, knowing there still are some sketchy people, even if it’s still light outside. I call a taxi, glancing around the empty streets. Until I hear someone grunt behind me. I turn on my feet, reaching for pepper spray in my purse, but get struck by a surprise.

Before me stands a man I just spend hours watching. Or the guy who plays him. Joey Batey. Dressed in full Jaskier attire, though. The red matching set he wore in episode six. He has his lute in his hands. Our eyes meet, and he looks scared out of his mind.

“Joey?” I ask, trying not to attack the actor with fangirling, who looks around, to see if there is someone else behind him. When he realizes it’s just us, he raises his eyebrows.

“I’m sorry?” He asks, looking around some more. Confusion paints his face as he looks at me once more. “Where am I?”

“Nottingham.” I say, but it doesn’t seem to clarify anything for him, as he raises his eyebrows even more.

“What is this Nottingham?” He takes a step back. “Who are you, exactly?”

“My name’s Y/N.” I raise my arms in the air, showing I mean no harm. “Joey, are you okay?”

“Who’s Joey?” His voice shakes. “I’m Jaskier.”

“I’m sorry, what?” Now I’m the one, raising my eyebrows. My phone beeps, informing me the taxi will be here in 5 minutes. Joeys, Jaskiers, eyes drop to the gadget, as he looks mortified.

“What is that?” He scoffs, taking a step back again. “You’re a sorceress. This is an illusion. Bloody witches keep ruining my days.”

“I am not a witch, Jo… Jaskier.” I correct myself but I can tell he’s not convinced. He grips on his lute tighter, eyeing me down.

“Where’s Geralt?” His voice is quiet. I feel dizzy, wondering if someone was smoking something funny up in my apartment building.

“Not here, as far as I know.” I squint, looking around, trying to see if I see Henry, dressed as Geralt just wondering the streets of Nottingham. My phone beeps again. Taxi is three minutes away. I see Jaskier stare at it again, so I slide it in my purse. “We can go to my place, you could rest, see if you feel better tomorrow?”

“I am not going anywhere with you, witch!” He puts on a brave face. I watch him turn left, as his face drops. He has no idea where he is. What exactly did he smoke?

“Jaskier. Please.” I plead, not sure what to do. I can’t pull out my phone and google ‘how to help people who are high off their mind’. That would probably give him a heart attack. “Trust me.”

“How can I trust someone who put me in this mirage?” Shit. I guess I will have to play along.

“I don’t know where I am either. I woke up in here, and I tried to find a way out. Until I just settled.” I say whatever comes to my mind as I see Jaskier slowly relax. How naïve of him, “If you are here too, maybe we both can figure something out. Maybe Geralt and Yennefer can help.”

“You know Yennefer.” His voice grows cold and I realize I messed up. I stare at him, not sure how to get him on my side again. The taxi is probably a minute away, and I cant leave Joey alone, not when he is this much out of his mind. But I cant take him clubbing either.

“I know the Continent. I heard your songs, Jaskier.” I plead, looking around. I don’t hear a car just yet. “Toss a coin to your Witcher, o valley of plenty.”

“You know my songs?” He seems to relax again, and I become anxious to get him off the street.

“Please come with me.” I plead, rushing to him.

Before he can respond, I grab his hand, dragging him inside. I hear him grunt, at what I can only assume, is the smell. My phone begins ringing, alerting that the taxi is here. I don’t stop, dragging him to the third floor. I struggle at the door, as my hands shake. When I eventually get the key in, I practically push him inside, locking the door behind us.

I take my phone out, answering.

“I am so sorry, sir. I changed my mind, my um, cat, started throwing up.” I blabber as Jaskier is fearfully looking around. “I might need to take him to the vet, I can’t go out. Please charge my card for your time to come here and have a nice evening.”

I hang up, my heart beating slower. If any sane person saw us, especially saw Jaskier, they might have called ambulance or police. Imagine the news.

“The hit show’s “The Witcher” star was found high out of his mind in the streets of Nottingham. Joey Batey, reportedly, kept saying he is Jaskier, calling everyone sorceresses.”

Wonderful. I look at him now, not sure how to refer to him. My phone dings again, and I look at it, swearing. But it’s a notification. From Instagram.

Joey Batey just updated his story. I open it, to see it’s a picture of him and Henry, with a caption ‘catching up before season 2’. I lift my head, swallowing hard. Jaskier turns around to face me, and my heart drops.

What is going on?

[PART TWO]

[fatrainbowmermaidunicorn]

Art Class (Jungkook x You ONESHOT)

A/N: Thankyou for this fantastic request but unfortunately no, I dont do full on smut, not because I'm against it or anything but I just think I'm not that good at it yet. But I  tried make it as  sexy as I can, I hope you will enjoy this story that I have come up with nevertheless <3 and sorry its not that long, 3k words.

Implied smut/light smut? (Is there such things as light smut?)

MASTERLIST

"Your project for this term is Precious. You will need to draw and paint something precious to you, focusing solely on the item. I want to see how you highlight this precious item of yours, how you are going to make it stand out from an unique background," The art professor explain as she hands out their project brief. Jungkook read the paper given and huffed, his mind spinning trying to find the perfect inspiration on what to do.

The project boggled his mind for the whole day, even as he slumped down on the couch next to his roomate, the one and only Kim Taehyung who is watching a movie while stuffing his face with popcorn.

"What's with you?" He eyed Jungkook. "I swear Kook, you are the most stressed out art student I have ever met,"

"We have a new project,"

"And?"

"I cant seem to think of anything. Nothing. Not even one inspiration comes to mind. It counts for almost 50 percent of my grade this semester. I'm screwed if I dont ace it," he whined. Taehyung turned his body to face him.

"Okay, tell me what its about. I'm sure me and my absolutely great mind will be able to help you," he grins. Despite not believing that Taehyung could ever help him, Jungkook still explain the project brief to his hyung. Taehyung nodded and his brows crased as he thought hard.

"I dont know Tae. Everybody is doing the same thing. Placing their precious item on a blank wall, a green grass, a wooden plank... its all so typical. I need something else to make my work popped up from the rest," Taehyung look at the disgruntled maknae and finally an idea spark his mind.

"I have an idea, but I dont think either you or Y/N would like it," he smirked.

"Y/N? What does my girlfriend has to do with this?" Jungkook raised an eyebrow.

"Oh, your girlfriend has everything to do with it," Taehyung wiggled his eyebrows. Taehyung is always mischievious, his idea always makes one of them end up in a very very bad situation. What is his hyung up to now? "Do you want to hear it or not?" Taehyung rolled his eyes at the reluctant younger male.

"Fine. Just tell me. What is it?" Jungkook huffed. He got nothing to lose if he listen to Taehyung's crazy ideas anyway, so he might as well jist hear it. Maybe it could spark some inspiration for him.

Taehyung grinned, his smile widen as his eyes twinkled. Jungkook already had a bad feeling about this, and what comes out from Taehyung's mouth next proves that he is right. "Do you still remember what you learned last semester?"

/////

Jungkook ran his hand all over his face for the millionth time, thinking about how he is supposed to even ask you for this favor. Even just the simple thought of you is already enough to make him restless all night, how is he going to proceed with Taehyung's idea?

You and him has been dating for more than six months now. Your relationship is great. You two are in love, and Jungkook is an amazing boyfriend, but the two of you havent done anything more other than some intense makeout session and some slight groping here and there whenever you two spend the night with each other. You had wanted more since the first moment you saw him, but just your luck, your boyfriend is a total gentleman who believes in romantic gestures and waiting for the right time. His intention is sweet but really, you are so in love with him you are willing to give him everything if he just asks of you.

"Hey baby," he leaned in to kiss you as you plopped down on his bed, putting your bag and books on his table, kissing him back. God, you just cant get enough of him.

"Hi Kookie. So what's up?" You smiled at him. He had invited you to his room, saying he has a favor to ask you. Something to do with his art class. Jungkook is an art major, and he has an incrdible talent in drawing and painting too. But like every other great artists out there, sometimes he rans out of inspiration and calls you up to help him. The two of you would go out and talk about everything, just so he can find something that might spark his interest again. You look at your boyfriend who is nervously fiddling with his hands. Weird, he was never this nervous when talking about art.

"I... I need you to help me model for my art class," he stuttered, but you still find him absolutely adorable.

"I know Kookie. You told me that," you giggled. Why is he so nervous? This is not the first time you have model for him for his classes. "So... what can I help you with? What's the theme?"

"Precious. We are supposed to draw something that is precious to us, but with a unique background. The professor wants to see how we can turn the focus of drawing on the item instead of the background," he explained, voice still has a hint of nervousness.

"Oh, interesting," you smile. "I'm sure you have some interesting ideas Kookie. So what's your item?" Jungkook went over his table and took out an expensive jewellery box, making you even more curious.

"This belongs to my late mother. And I have always keeps it with me," He took out a huge necklace with a blue sapphire diamond heart in the middle of it. Your eyes widen, its the most beautiful thing you have ever seen.

"So you want me to wear this and pose for you?" You held the beautiful necklace between your fingers, examining how it shines between your skin.

"Ye...yes," he fumbled looking at you. You looked back at him, confused to as why he is nervous. Wearing a necklace and pose, nothing big right?

"Okay. Seems easy enough," you smile. "I can easily do that,"

"But... I dont only want you to wear the necklace," Jungkook gulp, hands fiddling with the necklace, as if trying to find some courage, before continuing. You raised an eyebrow questioningly at him. What does he means? "I want you to wear only the necklace..."

Your head immediately snapped around to look at him. Did you heard him correctly? Did he meant what you think he meant?

"Wh...what?"

"I want to draw you while you are wearing this. Only wearing this," he held up the necklace, voice more confident now as he stares into your eyes. You were silenced for a minute as you heard his request loud and clear. You can already feel something stirring at the lower part of your body as you imagined posing nude for him.

Posing nude for Jeon Jungkook.

"O..okay," you breathed out your agreement after pondering for a moment.

Jungkook's eyes widen at your answer. He thought you would slap him silly and never want to ever talk to him again, but instead, here you are, nervous and surprised, of course, but still, agreed.

"Okay?" He reconfirms, still not believing it.

"Yes Jungkook. Okay," you smile.

Jungkook felt his heart starts to beat faster and his palms turns sweaty  Drawing and painting a nude model during his last semester is already a huge problem for Jungkook. He was a nervous wreck the first time the life model took off her robe and stood in front of his class last semester. Sure, he is no innocent. He has been with his fair share of girls before,

But you?

Drawing a naked you?

How the hell is he supposed to survive that?

He is not sure how he is able to control himself when you are strip bare in front of him. He is not sure he can control anything with you standing in front of him.

He has the biggest crush on you for years before he found the courage and managed to finally call you as his own. And he had to calm himself down multiple times, sometimes even a long toilet break is needed whenever you spend the night with him, cuddling or after a long makeout session. Can he get out of this assignment alive? Should he just scrap the idea? He knew it, listening to Taehyung never did him any good.

You giggle when you noticed Jungkook's shocked expression and he dazed out. He immediately cleared his throat at the sound of your laugh and went to sit behind his easel.

"So... are we doing this now?" You asks, making Jungkook's face turned red like a tomato.

"Urm... yes. If you are up to it. Whenever you are ready," he tried to stay calm.

"Okay. Lets do it today then," you smile as he nodded.

You stood up slowly from his bed and start to slid the straps of your dress down your shoulders, slowly, almost teasingly. Jungkook's eyes never left you and you saw him take big gulps or air as he seems to have trouble breathing. You let your dress drop to the floor, revealing your almost bare body, only clad in your innocent white undergarments before you take the necklace and wear it, the diamond felt cold as it lay flat between the valley of your breasts, all the while eyes never leaving his. Jungkook's eyes roam down your body and you can see how hard he is gripping his pencil for some self restrain. You patted the necklace once you were done, your hands went behind your back and starts to undo you bra claspes, slowly sliding the straps of your shoulder, finally revealing you bare chest to Jungkook's prying eyes. You feel your heart beat increased under Jungkook's blazing stare, and you start to rub your thighs together, feeling yourself getting wetter and wetter.

Jungkook cant control his breathing any longer as he stares at your very naked chest. He feels like he is about to faint. He had spend many nights imagining how you would look like,  a gazzilion times maybe, but this... ypu standing bare in front of him, smiling at him with blushing cheeks... you are more beautiful than anything he could have ever imagined. If he feel like fainting the moment before, he is sure he is dying the moment you slid down you panties past your smooth long legs and slowly step out of it, leaving yourself fully bare to him. Jungkook's breath starts to staggered and he almost broke the pencil that he is holding too tightly when you purposely ran your hands down your body agonizingly slow and soft over your core, which is glistening with how wet you were, teasing him, eyes boring deep intp his dark ones. You finaly decide to stop teasing him and sat down on the bed, laying down across the mattress, spreading yourself a little, purposely letting him see all of you.

"How do you want me?" You asks, as if its the most normal question in the world and you are just posing for another one of his usual projects. Jungkook gulp, his mouth is dry, unable to answer. I want you under me. Is the only answer Jungkook can think about. You adjusted yourself on the bed when you received no response from your boyfriend who just continued staring at you, trying out different position and settled on one that you think is suitable. "Is this position okay?" You asks innocently, cocking your head to the side. Jungkook can see the wetness in your core as you spread for him even more, making him lick his bottom lip unconciously, which makes you let out a little giggle. You know exactly what you are doing to him and you like it. You just hope you will get what you want at the end of the day.

He avoided your gaze and try to calm himself down. This is an assigment Jungkook. An assignment. But when he tried to settle his eyes on you, you were already looking at him, eyes wide and biting your lower lip. You look so innocent but sinful at the same time, Jungkook feel like he is just about to burst. He can feel himself start to grow harder snd harder and he cursed himself for wearing such a thin sweatpants. You are surely going to notice his hardening erection at this rate.

And he is right. You did.

He adjusted himself on his stool and try focus on his drawing instead. Its an assignment Jungkook. An assignment!

"I'm going to start now," he announced, clearing his throat. You nodded silently as you lick you dry lower lip nervously, an action that didnt go unnoticed by Jungkook, making him groaned internally. Why is he putting himself through this torture?

Jungkook starts off from the top of your head and slowly move on to your face. He lightly sketches your face, capturing every crease, crook, contour and line of your features, silently praising how beautiful you are and how proud he is that you are his. His hands starts to shake as he move on to your neck, hands gracefully sketching the necklace, the supposed main focus of the painting, and your chest area. He nervousky gazed his eyes to the rest of you, which is in a laying down form, your eyes staring back at him when he flicked his eyes to your face, before continuing down your body.

Your chest.

Your naked chest.

His grip on his pencil tighten as he noticed how your nipples are getting harder, turning into hard nubs under the cold air and his intense gaze. It took everything in him to not just walked over to you capture one of the harden nubs into his mouth. He shakes his head, clearing the image out of his mind and continue sketching and drawing, trying his best to concerntrate when you suddenly let out an accidental moan when your leg hit the bed frame when you tried to readjust your position. At the sound of your moaning Jungkook lost all of his self restrain, the pencil in his grip broken from how hard he is holding it. He stood up suddenly, causinfmg the wooden stool he was sitting on fall down and marched towards you, eyes dark and blown.

"Jung... Jungkook? Are.. are you okay?"

"Dont act so innocent Y/N. You know exactly what you are doing to me. You know I am definitely not okay," he hissed before crashing his lips against yours, his body pining your naked one on the bed. Taken by surprised, your eyes widen as he kiss you before you realized the situation and start to kiss him back, suddenly very aware of how naked you are and how fully clothed Jungkook is when you feel his hands roaming all over your body. Every inch that his fingers grazed felt like it was on fire and you want nothing more than to feel his bare skin on yours.

"Can you feel this? This is what you do to me," He grind his clothed erection which is extremely hard by now, on your wet core, making you moan even louder. "Louder baby. Let me hear you," he coaxed, his hands quickly taking off his own suffocating clothing, presenting you with taut abs and muscle thighs that left you gapping as he leaned in to kiss along your neck and jawline, his fingers fiddling with the necklace while the other went down your body, stopping and touching where you wanted him the most, inserting a finger in.

"Look at you. So wet. You are supposed to help me with my assignment baby, not teasing me," he growled as his hands never stop touching and thrusting into you. You lost all your ability to spit out coherent words as his fingers continue their ministration, but struggle to say something to him as you realized he is waiting for an answer from you.

"I.. I am he... helping you," you answered back between pants and moans, the pleasure Jungkook's giving you starts to increased as he moved faster.

"Oh really? You are helping me? I should properly thank you then," he whispered as he bite an earlobe, he fingers that has been thrusting into you leaving your core, making you feel empty, but that only lasted for a second before he slid himself in you in one swift motion, without warning.

"Ahh, Jungkook..."

The two of you rolled off each other, sweaty and still panting from the extreme pleasure you just felt. Jungkook gave you a quick kiss on the lips and smile at you. "I love you Y/N. You know that right?"

You nodded shyly. "I love you too Jeon Jungkook,"

He pulled you closer to his sweaty chest and hug you tight, his fingers playing with the necklace. "This really suits you. You should wear it more often," he said making you smile. "But only this," he winked.

You blushed and buried your face in his chest. He tucked your head under his chin and kiss your hair as you hear him mumble.

"But I dont think my item will stand out more than the background though," he said while he loosen his hold and eyed your body up and down, making you blush even harder. You hide your face in the crook of his neck as he laugh at your adorable shyness.

"But still, for the first time in my life, I am so glad I listen to Tae-hyung's idea,"

[i-am-adlocked]

GOT TAGGED BY MY HOMIE @adler-hawkeye THANKS MAN U DA MAN

Answer 30 questions and then tag 20 blogs you would like to know better

Nickname: Oli (cos the pronounciation of ALLYSA is like “All is a ___” cos my parents procrastinated on my name so they used the first thing they saw, which is a painting in the hospital that says “All is a miracle.” and they didn’t want Miracle because they thought it’s so normal.)

Gender: F

Star sign: Capricorn

Height: 5'3″

Time: 09:00 AM (Legit exact)

Birthday: January 8.

Favourite band(s): Queen, Eraserheads, Coldplay, Radiohead, i know i have more but i just woke up

Favourite solo artist(s): Lady Gaga, Beyoncé, Fleurie, Lorde, Adele 

Song stuck in my head: the music in The Caterpillar scene in the Alice’s Adventures in Wonderland Ballet

Last movie I watched: “The Hobbit: The Desolation of Smaug” my dad was watching it and I couldn’t stop myself

Last show I watched: The Good Place

When did I create my blog: Just about two years ago, I think?

What do I post: I reblog mostly but nowadays, usually fanvids I made and GIFs of either ANGSTlock or ADlock or HARRY POTTER

Last thing I googled: “teen john meets sherlock outside hospital busking gen fic turkey sandwich enola holmes” I WAS FINDING A SPECIFIC FIC OKAY (it’s “Only Intelligent” by Basser)

Do you have other blogs: Nope. Well, actually, I do have one in WordPress but that’s a secret ;)

Do you get asks: Only once or twice a year lol

Why did you choose your url: Because I initially had a blog in 2012 called “imSHERlocked221b.tumblr.com” and I got threats and bashes for shipping Adlock so two years ago I deleted that and made this one as a slap in the face, like YOU CANT MAKE ME GO DOWN

Following: 211

Followers: 2566?!?!?!? I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS THAT MANY OH MY GOD THANK YOU EVERYONE

Favorite color: Navy Blue, Blood Red, Black (tho technically it’s a hue)

Average hours of sleep: 2-5 hours every weekday, 2-17 hours in weekends. My sleeping pattern is fucked up.

Lucky number: 8

Instruments: Piano by ear and sheets, Violin with lots of determination, Voice usually when alone because I sing explosive high-note songs

What am I wearing: Beige pair of shorts, navy blue shirt, beige dressing gown, daz it, im at home i should be preparing for school

How many blankets do I sleep with: 1, though I put a pillow on top of me and the blanket when I sleep, for added weight... like a weighted blanket

Dream job: THEATRE or ACTING

Dream trip: ANYTHING HARRY POTTER OR SHERLOCK

Favorite food: Pizza, anything as long as I have Coca-Cola by my side

Nationality: Filipino!

Favorite song now: Turning Tables by Adele

@thank-you-for-being-with-me @sentimentalgenius you two also my homies, im shy so just two people for now lmao

[ddcassiere]

That’s exactly what happened

Jesus surrounded by tits - cheap chinese acrylic on cheap chinese A4 paper - Porto, April 2018

During my 2017-2019 busking, hitchiking, gigging, world tour, I couldnt help but painting most of my mornings away. 

(As I write, right now, I am hangover from few glasses of wine I had yesterday with my friends, I hope you accept the randomness of this post. I am 33 and it gets harder in the mornings..)

I had prepared other topics to talk through but I just realized that I would rather write this blogs on feelings of the moment rather than on a detailed plan. And that to me, this principle could be applied to anything. 

It’s not by chance that in one of the songs from Multipolar Vol. 1 I sing:

“..con l’aspettativa di non averti piu’, cara Aspettativa..” - Un Di-Di.

(with the expectation of having you no more, dear expectation)

song here : https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gjYCJLvxe1I

full album here : https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Xksf6hpuLlA&t=5s

At the moment I write this post, I am listening to Johnny Cash. Even though I cant say I have listened to him for more than just 5 years or so, I can tell you that this guy has had as much influence to me as any other huge icons of mine.

On a gloomy day of November 2016, I was resting in bed, having a free day from my then “normal’ job. I was so heavily depressed about not having time for playing that I could no more smile. 

I felt a fucking heavy weight on my chest and I started to consider seriously the idea of killing myself and goodbye everybody, goodbye stupid job, boring days and conversations, my time was dead anyway.

From times to times I would bring the guitar at work and after finishing the shift I would go to the main square of Wroclaw, Poland, open the case, throw in some of my own coins, expose my first album and start to play.

Me as a very happy employee - pic by friendly pic machine in Rome Tiburtina, right before leaving to Wroclaw, August 2015

I cant describe how happy you can be, to do something like that and just earn enough to keep you sheltered and fed. It sends you to space, seriously. You start levitate as you walk back homeward. Butterflies in the stomach. 

I would earn more in a hour than I would earn in the same time doing a shitty job. And the shitty job provided me with a rented apartment that, even though it was cozy, I never had time to actually enjoy, and with money that barely fed me and got me drunk on weekends to forget my shitty fucking boring life. That was it. 

I was earning money enough to keep me alive to go to work. Just like a slave. Just like pretty much everybody.

So I did start thinking it would have been a cool idea to try my life on the street. But I was never serious about that. 

Will I survive? Will I end up cold and hungry on a dark corner of a far away city? Will I this and will I that?..

It takes several kilos of balls to drop everything.. every comfort, every goddamn warm bed and new clothes, every new pair of shoes to follow your forever dreams.

And I didnt think I had those balls back then.

In the previous weeks, before that day laying in bed, I met and hosted few couchsurfers who encouraged me to do it. But that still wasnt enough.

Some calls it law of attraction, some call it fate, I think in my case it’s about planting seeds and wait for them to grow as spring comes through. So when that day I heard “I walk The line’ by Johnny Cash and precisely the first sentence, I felt like I had heard that song for the first time in my life. 

It was an epiphany of my whole being: “I find it very very easy to be true”.

A bit tired after the flight to Tehran - Jan 2017 - Pic by I forgot the name

In my belly I felt something was planted, some kind of flower of hope that would have grown and I just had to be careful enough to protect it from storms. 

Then few days after I had a dream. It was a very long dream and I will try to make it short. I had killed Tom Waits and I was in Jail with Michael Stipe from the R.e.m.

All my friends and colleagues were in jail with me. Nobody seemed to mind about being in jail. They all acted as if it was allright to be in jail.

I woke up earlier than usual and kept writing the dream on my little notebook as I was going to work with the tram. I felt very strange.

The day after I catched a fever. Violent fever that forced me in bed for a week. 

I listened to Johnny Cash again. Then something happened that I wouldnt know how to describe. Because I wasnt fully conscious of what it was by then.

Tow days earlier Leonard Cohen died. Two days after Trump was elected.

This is the amount of tobacco I smoke when I hear new like those - Tbilisi, Georgia, March 2017. 

I can just say that in a half an hour I found myself, as ragged and dirty and feverish I was from a week spent at home, right in front the door of the HR department of my job. Waiting in line to be received.

Then signing my resignation papers. Then going back home like a sleepwalker.

Then booking a flight to Tehran. Then booking a bus to Italy. Then throwing 3/4 of my clothes out the trash bins right outside the block. For the joy of the now very sharply dressed homeless guys.

Then packing. Then drinking an ice cold beer. All in all it took 3 hours to change my life. 

All I hadnt given away from the apartment in Wroclaw. And that was now coming to Italy with me. - Wroclaw old bus station, 2017 - Pic by Katarzyna Peukart

A month later I was a free man (as free as you can be in Iran) playing in Tehran and in Shiraz street Afif Habad. I will come back home in a moment I would say.

Sleepwalking in Rome, going to take my flight to Tehran - Rome 2017, pic by Nicole Simoncelli. 

Ready to leave? Pic by Nicole Simoncelli

But it went on and on. I hitchiked my way back to Europe and it took me two years. I slept out in on benches a couple of time here and there. In Greece, In Chech Republic, in Portugal. I travelled more than 20 countries mostly by autostop, I gigged wherever needed. I washed my clothes everyday in the hostel showers, by hand and by feet, I ate what I could eat and I tried to stay warm. Even though that wasnt always possible.

Playing setar in Esfahan. Creation by Sofya Zeinilava

Now I am tired of writing. I need to come back to my music. I promised a dear artist friend to send her some ambient music for her exhibition in Prague.  And tomorrow is Fat Jesus day so I need to work also on that. And there are so many other projects going on.

Posing with the clear blue sky of the smiley city of Tehran on the fucking I forgot the name of the bridge. Tabiat I think, yes I googled it and its Tabiat- Pic by Fatemeh A. - Tehran 2017

Johnny Cash still plays here in my flat in Italy. And I feel he is planting more seeds in me, and that I strongly feel the hitch to come back on the road.

And I feel things are changing inside of me. But I dont plan. 

Well I do, but in the end, if there is something I learned from these two years on the road, is that it’s not me that decides, but the music. As it has always been and as it will always be. Amen and see you next friday with “Naked Songs”

.Love, Courage and Joy to each and every one.

D.

[artificialqueens]

City of Stars (Pearlet) - Leatwerpenn

A/N - The moment we have all been waiting for. Its spring, and spring is the season for valentines, isn’t it? Once again, if you have missed the previous chapters (Or if you cant find them in the tags) you can find them HERE in the masterpost.  Some minor mentions of Violet/Adore and friendship between Violet/Fame / Pearl/Willam and Pearl/Detox City of stars, are you shining just for me?

Chapter 3

(2011) 5 Years Before. LA. Spring. “Thank you for coming Mr Dardo”. Jason looked up at the casting agent and he could see in their eyes that he wasn’t getting a call back from this audition either. Damn, 5 this week and nothing. Are you serious? -  He thought. Sighing heavily, Jason picked up his bag and left the studio in a rush of tears. _______________________________________ Jason found himself once again, face buried into his pillow of his apartment. Kurtis and Patrick’s relationship seemed to be getting more serious, resulting in the apartment being quiet and lifeless. Jason didn’t mind this, because at least when he was Violet, there was no need to sneak down the fire escape to avoid Kurtis anymore. He lost his steady gig at Roy’s after he decided to do his own thing that night a couple of months back. Jason still worked at the coffee shop though, but his work as Violet was pretty much, non-existent. Jason was still finding it hard to come to terms with himself and who Violet was, or rather, how Jason and Violet fit together. This being the main reason he wasn’t really getting any work as Violet. The idea of being called a Drag Queen didn’t appeal to him. Sometimes, he felt like being Jason and sometimes he felt like being Violet. He was scared that people wouldn’t understand that. Why am I like this? A feeling of desperation began to take over. He could barely understand how he had gotten to this point. So this is what rock bottom feels like.  Jason took out his phone and scrolled through his contacts, stopping once it landed on Boomers number. Am I desperate enough to get money from him? He put his head back into his pillow and cried harder than he felt like he ever had. Jason picked his phone back up and started to scroll through his photos. He stopped when he saw a photo that he had clearly forgotten to delete. It was a photo of his ex, Danny, who was now a really successful musician - who was very comfortable in not only being Danny, but being Adore too. Jason both loved and hated Danny, he had everything Jason desired, well almost everything. Danny liked to perform as himself when it came to music but he was a successful drag artist too. Jason was drawn to him because of his self-confidence. Danny soon realised that Jason was a fucking mess and dumped him not long after they slept together the first time. Is that why you dumped me? Am I that repulsive? He had never told Danny about Violet. He was afraid.  Deleting the picture, he checked his phone for any more signs of Danny. All evidence had been deleted. Thank god. Jason’s mind wondered back to his insecurities as he laid on his bed. He turned and was now laying on his back. He loved the stars; but hated that he couldn’t see them outside much in LA because of the pollution. One night a few months back, when he had drunk more vodka than he cared to admit, he stole some of those glow in the dark stars from the dollar store. Those stars were now super glued to his ceiling. He liked to gaze at them when he felt lost. Tonight, he was lost. Jason got up, closed his curtains, turned the lights off and laid back on his bed, and all he could see were stars. (2003) 8 years before. Atlanta. Spring. Who is this person looking back at me, what is your name. Jason looked at himself in the mirror or, herself? God, who am I. He watched, as the mascara dripped down the side of his face in morbid fascination. Down his cheek… chin… drip. Jason heard his mother clear her throat behind him. He didn’t move to look at her. “Hi honey, what are you doing” His mother quietly approached, and perched next to him at her vanity. She nudged Jason’s shoulder when she didn’t get a response. “Who am I mum?” Jason’s tears fell over the edge and he grabbed his mum in a tight embrace. “What am I going to do when you go?” He could feel his mum stroking the back of his hair to soothe him. “I don’t know angel, but I know that you are an amazing human being. You’ll figure it out. You are only 14 years old, everything isn’t supposed to make sense yet. Hell, I’m dying of cancer and it still doesn’t make sense. You are my child, and I will love you no matter what. You are my star.” Jason looked at his mum through his smudged make-up and gave her a small smile. “Now, if I help you do your face, will you come and sing with me while I play our tune. I know you have that song finished sweetie and I would love to hear it.” Jason gave a small nod and his mom and she started to work on touching up his makeup. When she was finished, he looked into the mirror, and all he could see were stars. (2011) LA. Spring. Jason woke up in pitch darkness. It wasn’t often that he slept in the dark as it frightened him. He was rudely awoke from a dream of his Mother by his phone. It was violently vibrating on his bedside table.

“Hello?” He answered groggily. “Jason, where the fuck are you? You were supposed to be coming with me to that make-up benefit I told you about.” Jason smiled as Kurtis continued to bust his balls about being so miserable all the time. Why can’t I be more positive like Kurtis was? Wait. “Hey, sorry to interrupt but… I do want to come, and I’m actually not working but…” Jason wanted to tell Kurtis so badly about Violet. God, this is so hard. “Okay, I’m going to tell you a secret, and the only other person in the world who knows this about me is dead so… Can you come home?” Jason felt the tears in his eyes but he wanted so badly to tell somebody. “Umm, sure. We have to go in about an hour though, are you good for that?” Jason panicked, he normally spent at least 2 hours becoming Violet. However, he wanted to be challenged. “Just get here ASAP!” Hanging up the phone, he put his favourite instrumental Spotify playlist on and started to become Violet. _______________________________________ Violet sat on the couch opposite the front door to her small two bedroom apartment. She was dressed fairly casual for her. She was afraid she might scare Kurtis too much. She wore a beautiful navy blue dress that was tight around her shapely body, which was cinched at the waist. From there, it fell around her hips and down to her knee’s in a sea of ripples and waves. She had painted her face that night, to appear as feminine and female as she possibly could, put on her favourite curly black wigs, and the only pair of nice earrings she owned. To finish the look she added her signature beauty mark and a pair of nude high heels. Fuck, where is Kurtis? Is my only friend standing me up right now? Impatiently tapping her foot, she took out her compact mirror from her matching nude clutch and checked her makeup. As she opened the mirror, she could swear she could see gold in her eyes. Violet blinked, and it was gone. The front door opened, making her jump and she dropped her compact on the floor. She had been staring at the compact for what seemed like forever. “Umm, emo face, look at me so I can take you in” Violet looked up to be greeted by the biggest smile she had ever seen Kurtis wear. He looked like a child on Christmas morning and was grinning like a moron. “I fucking knew it! I knew you were a drag queen!” Violets heart sunk at hearing those words, but she knew what and who she was and she understood the assumption. “Okay, this is going to sound insane, but please hear me out before you say anything else. When I was little, I always loved women, the beauty of them, the glamour, the makeup. Everything. The only thing I didn’t like, was the fact that I didn’t desire to be romantic with them. Anyway, as I grew older, I guess you could say that I started to cross dress. But, I am not a drag queen. At this moment in time, I am Violet Chachki, my pronouns are she and her. I am not Jason Dardo. Do you get it Kurtis?” Violet was begging him to understand. Please understand. “So at this moment in time you are Violet Chachki, my roommate. Okay, sure. Are you ready to go?” He held his hand out for Violet to take. She was stunned. Wow, that was easy. Taking Violet by the hand, Kurtis could have sworn her eyes were golden. Violet looked at Kurtis in a different light. Finally, someone knew. She let Kurtis drive her, as she had no idea where they were even going, and as she looked out of the window, all she could see were stars. _______________________________________ (2011) LA. Spring. Matt sat in the basement. His hands hovering over the keys like they always seemed to these days. For some reason, playing hadn’t felt right lately. The woman performing at the club was the only thing occupying his thoughts recently. Well, not exactly a woman, a drag queen. Upon leaving the club Matt did some research, he found out her name was Violet Chachki, and she performed every first Saturday of the month. He had revisited the club twice since then and she wasn’t there either time, and that really bothered him. How the fuck did she get a hold of my music? What bothered him more, was that it appeared that a woman was the reason he was happily going into a gay nightclub for the first time. This notion often put a smile on his face. How ironic. After a brief period of Googling, Matt couldn’t locate it anywhere. He even searched his own name on Spotify, which was insane to him, but still nothing came up. He was confused. The confusion haunted him. Matt wasn’t really into any local or new music, unless it was Jazz. This made his search even harder. He even resorted to playing it for Siri, unfortunately she didn’t know what was happening. Stupid Phone! City of Stars… something about shining. Fuck! Why can’t I remember her lyrics? Matt sat at his piano and tried to play the song over and over. He had done this every day since that night at the bar, but now he couldn’t even play his favourite song. Fuck my life. He sat there with his eyes closed and thought about Violet. She was quickly becoming his muse, and even though he had only seen her once, her presence caused him to have a warm feeling in his heart. She was the most radiant woman he had ever laid eyes on. Matt still wasn’t convinced she was even a drag queen, maybe she was transgender? This was becoming an obsession. Before Matt realised, he opened his eyes to see his hands moving gracefully across his keys. He hadn’t heard this sound before. He closed his eyes again and let the music take over him. The melody he was playing sounded painfully sad, but beautiful. It sounded, to him, damaged and like it held secrets that wanted to burst open. Matt’s eyes opened suddenly, and all he could see were stars. (2003) New York. Spring. “Dude, what are you doing?” Matt S, or Detox, as Matt liked to call him, stood over Matt with the biggest frown. Matt called Matt S Detox because they were always together, and calling each other Matt just got confusing. Matt couldn’t even remember how Detox came about but it had stuck. “What do you mean what am I doing? I’m taking a picture to send to someone.” Matt held his phone out in front of himself and took a picture. “Eww I look ugly. Should I take my top off?” He looked at Detox with pleading eyes. “Dude, who are you sending a picture too? And definitely take your top off you idiot! If you’re trying to get into someone’s pants, you need to show off the goodies.” Detox wiggled his brows and Matt laughed. “It’s to Courtney, you know, that hot Australian girl that just started. Fuck, she’s hot. Right?” Matt glanced down for approval, but Detox was frowning again. What the hell is up with him? “Courtney? But she has a vagina, I thought you liked…”Just as Detox went to continue his sentence Matt ran to his bedroom door and closed it shut. “Dude, shut up! My dad is downstairs and you know what he is like…” he said in a hushed tone. “I actually find Courtney attractive, like, I want to fuck her. Is that…weird? Maybe I’m not… Like you?” Matt didn’t know how he expected Detox to react. But Detox just smiled. “Matt, you can like whoever you want. I will take that part of you that we shared all those years ago to the grave. But I will always be your friend no matter who you like, and no matter how much your dad hurts you… Understand?” Detox took the phone from Matt and moved to the other side of the room. “Now let’s take a cute picture before your dad comes up here, see’s you half naked and tries to kill me for corrupting your 16 year old mind?” A goofy smile began spreading across Matt’s face. Detox took a few snaps of him before he chose one to send to Courtney. He pulled his shirt back on and sat in front of the mirror. “Ask me a truth Detox, like we are playing truth or dare” Matt looked serious. Detox decided to play along. “What is your sexual orientation?” Detox looked him dead in the eye. Matt looked back at him in the mirror. “I just like sexy people, male, female, or anything in between. Google might be able to define it but I can’t, yet.” Matt felt like a weight had been lifted as he looked at his friend in the mirror. “Give me a dare bitch.” He grinned. “I dare you to get your septum pierced!” Detox starting laughing, he knew how much Matt wanted him to dare him to get a tattoo. He looked shaken. Detox grabbed Matt and pushed him out of his bedroom door and down the stairs. Matt looked to where his dad was sitting on the sofa, beer in hand. He rolled his eyes, grabbed his keys and his wallet, and left the house. Fucking waster. An hour or so later, he sat in the chair at the piercing parlour in Brooklyn. He had a needle going through his nose, and all he could see were some very blurry stars.

(2011) LA. Spring.

Matt had work tonight. He was playing at some fancy benefit in a more residential area of LA. He still hadn’t ended things with her as she had been filming in Europe for the past two months, and wasn’t due home for a while. He knew that the benefit was for a make-up company, but apart from that he didn’t know much about it. Willam was going, as he had worked with the make-up company before. Matt found it humouring that it was supposed to be a fancy party and Willam had been invited. Willam was anything but fancy. Matt wore a dark grey pinstripe suit, white shirt, his violet pocket square, and matching tie. He had really warmed to these two items over the past couple of months, although he had no idea why. He also kept his glasses on. Pulling up to the house, he got out and gave his keys to the valet for parking. He moved through the house and soon spotted one of the organisers and took the opportunity to ask them where he was to be stationed for the night. The hostess led him over to the most beautiful large white grand piano. Matt sat and took in his surroundings. He was in an expanse of open plan living space. Wow, and I thought Courtney and I had a nice place. Matt had arrived early as he was being paid to be there. As no guests had really arrived yet, he decided to take a walk around to familiarise himself with the place. He noted the location of the toilets, and more importantly, the smoking area. Matt returned and started to play. The hostess came to discuss the kind of music that should be played throughout the night. The hostess was fairly open to what Matt played which he loved. The hostess’ only request was ‘nothing too harsh’ as it would ruin the vibe of the benefit. Some people had started to arrive, so Matt took out his tip beanie and swapped it for the posh looking glass jar that had been placed there. Matt got lost in his own music and all he could see were stars. _______________________________________ Kurtis had his hand at the small of Violets back as he led her through the party. He introduced her as a long-time friend of his and Patricks’. She smiled at Kurtis and silently thanked him for accepting her. Violet mingled at the front of the party, and if anybody suspected anything about her, they didn’t say anything. Soon, Kurtis left Violets side to network, which she completely understood. She conversed with many different people at the party, and loved it, especially when they complimented her on her appearance. She felt stunning and beautiful. Violet was chatting outside near the smoking area when she heard a voice that jolted her. “I can clock a wig from a half mile away that is definitely a pig in a wig.” Her blood ran cold and she turned around to see Willam, a really well known drag queen in Hollywood, and whom she assumed, was Willam’s date or friend, staring straight at her. Violet didn’t quite know what to do, so she excused herself from the people whom she was chatting to and made her way inside to find Kurtis. As she made her way around the side of the building she stopped. A shiver move up her spine. That same shiver she felt a few months back. Breathe in. Breathe out. Am I cold? Shaking it off, she continued to move around the building, but as she moved the shiver grew, intensifying with each step. It was now lingering on her shoulders  all the way down to her fingertips. Then, she heard it. Violet could hear the most beautiful sound coming from a piano just inside the building. It however, wasn’t just any sound. It was her mother’s melody. The music she had randomly found on Spotify a couple of years ago under the name ‘One of 3 A’s’ and could never explain. She had Googled the band and could never find any results. It was saved to her playlist and she just assumed her mum had loved that song and had just told Violet it was her own. Nobody had ever heard of this artist before and now they were possibly playing in the next room, or, at least someone who was a fan of her same weird obscure taste in music. Holy fuck. She braced herself and walked into the room and stood to the side of the pianist. Her entire upper body was burning, so was her throat. And all she could see was one, single, star. _______________________________________ Matt hadn’t been playing long before Willam decided to come over and make a few comments about his mad skills with his fingers. He just smiled politely at his friend and tried to remain as professional and focused as he possibly could. He had a small crowd around the piano, chatting, sipping on wine and conversing about make-up. Matt didn’t really have a clue when it came to make-up, but he was enjoying the tips. He also didn’t really have a clue what he was playing, but the hostess had been eye-fucking him the entire night so it must have been good. Matt didn’t even realise he had started to play his tune until he felt that warmth in his heart again. This was the first time he had been able to play it in months and he smiled to himself. Apparently I have got my mojo back. As he glanced up at the people watching him, he felt like an explosion went off in his brain. His chest had never felt warmer, as he saw none other than the woman who had plagued his fantasies for the past 2 months staring right back at him, mouthing those lyrics that he had tried too hard to remember with those beautiful golden flecks in her eyes. Matt hadn’t smiled like this in years, and all he could see was one, single, star.