#the odds of me running into him are relatively high

[ancano]

The fun thing about old trauma is you'll go so long without a trigger that you'll think you're over it but then you realize that's not true and the things that trigger it have just reduced in quantity.

[hello-gloomy]

'Every doctor should have one.'

Ratchet x Fem!Reader

SMUT MDNI 18+

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Description: Ratchet offers to pick you up after an "event" at a friend's house. Arriving and seeing you walk out after he initially said bye to you that night, he sees just what kind of party it was and what you wore to it.

Warnings: Maybe OOC, horny, lots of describing of the reader's outfit. No penetration, and not really descriptive of smut, but it is there, I promise.

A/N: It came to me in a dream, and I just had to write it; I hope I did our lovely doc justice. Also, don't be mad that I cut off the good stuff; maybe I'll do more like this if you guys actually like it.

Words: 874

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He didn't know what made his helm hurt more: the thumping music from the giant house he was currently parked in front of or the strobing lights bleeding through the windows and open doors. He's getting more irritated by the minute of the thought of his cover being blown; it's a bit odd for an ambulance to be sitting outside of a human habisuite, especially if it is not there to take care of the injured or for an emergency. He almost texts you again until he sees you strut out with multiple locals surrounding you; he has to do a double take and just about reset his optics. His engine revs up at the sight of it, a high-collared white latex nurse uniform that stops above your thigh, paired with the medical cross in orange, his orange. Your nurse's hat has the same cross in orange; your white tights lead down to a pair of black heels. Primus, seeing you just made him want to grab you in front of everyone here. Your head turns in his direction at the sound of the engine, and you wave at him. The people surrounding you looked over at him as well. He flashed his lights a few times, and you smiled back. You waltz up to him with a few others still trailing behind you, amazed that you had an ambulance for a ride.

"How the hell did you get an ambulance?" One of the boys by you asked while you started touching the hood of Ratchet.

"My lover owns it, and let me borrow him for the night." You tell him while pushing your body more into Ratchet before hopping up and sitting on his hood. You continue to rub him while you chat with the last few curious people about your ride. All the while, Ratchet was trying not to overheat from having your ass directly on him and not being able to do anything about it. You say your final goodbyes and slap Ratchet before jumping off and entering the driver's seat. You drive in relative silence, waiting for him to complain or even fuss.

"Is your underwear my orange as well?" He starts evenly, and you have to steel yourself not to drop your jaw at his boldness.

"Did you take a hit of synth-en before you came and got me?" You tease while gripping the steering wheel; you can feel his gaze on you even though you don't know where he's looking from in his alt-mode. His engine hums a bit louder before he speaks again.

"Are you even wearing a bra?" he asks lowly. That dress looks so tight." You are grinning so hard at his crassness tonight; you love it when he drops the 'I don't care about anyone' attitude.

"Wanna see the answer to your first question?" You ask as he stops in front of your garage, and never have you been more grateful to live a bit farther from town than now. He turns off his headlights, and you take that as your cue to spread your legs; he moves your seat back a bit, which makes you let out a little squeak. He lets out a little sigh while looking at you. You run your hands down your chest to give him a little show before you show him the answer to his second question. You drag your hand back up your chest and then to your neck; you grab the zipper and slowly pull it down your body. You stop halfway down your naval, slightly pushing the fabric away from your chest. You heard him let out a soft gasp.

"So, doctor, what is your diagnosis?" You ask him sweetly while leaning further back into his seating, spreading your legs a bit further while playing with the edge of your dress.

"Well, I'll have to take a closer look," he tells you. You unbuckle the seat belt, fixing your dress just a little bit, and he transforms back to his bipedal mode. He leans down to your level and then scoops you up in his hands, holding you close to his face, smelling you, and rubbing you against his intake, giving little nips to the bare area of your chest where you opened it originally.

"Mhm, such a pretty nurse you are." He whispers close to your face while giving you little kisses.

"Every doctor should have one." You giggle back before moaning when he nudges his faceplate between your legs; he moves the fabric to the side so he can taste you better. Arching your back into his large glossa, you grind into him while he uses one of his digits to rub your chest. He keeps rubbing and licking and sucking until you gasp and let out a shout of his name. He slows down his ministrations on you; while you catch your breath, he moves to lay against the side of your house. You watch him while you calm down before patting his servo, holding you, and sliding down to his modesty panel. You give him a few grinds, and he groans in response before you stop and smile up at him.

"Care for me to give you a little check-up?"

[bitethedevil]

Raphael going to a noble party of some kind, disguised as a human, in order to find and schmooze with current and potential clients. While engaging with one such individual who seems particularly taken with him, from across the room he spots Tav, for once not dressed in adventurer's gear but decorated with finery. The Hero of Baldur's Gate is so radiant that, at a glance, one could be forgiven for mistaking the mortal as an angel in disguise. However, like the cambion, Tav also has noble-born partygoers vying for their attention, asking (and more often than not being granted) a dance with the hero, and perhaps gossip of nobles approaching the hero with dowry proposals and attempts at wooing this illustrious guest begin to reach the fiend's ears.

Thank you for the prompt! <3 Super interesting. This is just Raphael being Raphael pretty much. It's not super edited so bear with me.

And to others who have also sent me prompts: I have gotten so many of them! I'm very grateful and I'll try my best to get to as many of them as I can, though I have already warned that I am pretty slow.

Revenge (SFW)

Viola Gist, an elderly member of the Gist family who had run the trade of dyes in Baldur’s Gate, was talking Raphael’s ear off in the corner of the grand ball room. Nobles from all over the city had gathered in High Hall for one of the city’s annual balls.

Raphael was dressed in his best as always and managed to fit in so well that no one ever bothered to question if he actually belonged to the nobility of Baldur’s Gate. It was an art he had perfected many centuries ago. He rarely needed an invitation to go anywhere.

It was even easier when he happened to know quite a few people there. There was not a family in the Gate that he had not dealt with at some point. The ones who knew what he was kept wonderfully quiet, for no noble wanted to confess that they had asked for the help of a devil to keep their place far above heads of the smallfolk.

In fact, Lady Gist’s late husband himself had been a client of his and his soul was currently stashed away in his House of Hope. It seemed that his wife had moved on rather quickly, with the way she was dressed and the looks she was giving Raphael.

He indulged her, of course, with his smiles and charming comments. Her soul was not worth much, but what could he say? He was a collector, and he did love the idea of having the full set. Was their son and heir as gullible as his parents, he could be tempted to swing by to get him too in a couple of years.

Viola Gist kept blathering on while he tried his best to look intensely interested in what she said. He already had her. He was sure that all she needed was the tiniest push to convince her to sign his contract. Lady Gist was interrupted by some commotion behind her. Raphael raised an eyebrow and looked to where people seemed to be gathering around something or someone.

“Oh, it’s her,” the elderly lady said with a sneer after looking over her shoulder. “Can you imagine that? She was barely even raised in the city and now that she has returned, everyone is fawning over her for her hand in marriage. Between you and me, she might have the Sashenstar name, but she is truly only a distant relative to the main family.”

“Indeed? What a shame,” Raphael said and smiled at her. “The men of Baldur’s Gate surely must have terrible taste to hunt for anything new and shiny when there is such a magnificent jewel such as yourself right in front of them.”

His flirtations worked like a charm. Lady Gist blushed and giggled like a woman at least 40 years younger than what she actually was.

“It’s kind of you to say,” she said with that shrill giggle of hers. “Furthermore, I have been raised like a lady. You would not see me traversing through the wilderness with strangers, killing creatures of any sort like some brute.”

An odd description, Raphael thought.

“A brute, you say?” he asked. “What is the lady’s name?”

Lady Gist looked like she was trying to remember.

“Oh, it’s some dreadfully simple name,” she said and looked at the floor as she was thinking. “I don’t recall. It’s that girl that saved the city, or so they say. Mav? Tav?”

Raphael’s eyes widened slightly.

“Tav?” he asked slowly. “Tav…Sashenstar?”

“Yes, her,” Lady Gist said and waved her hand in a dismissive gesture.

That was news to him. He had done so much careful digging on the adventurers back then, but the fact that the little mouse who had snubbed him of his crown was a noble had not come up.

He looked through the crowd over the Lady’s shoulder. There she was, being almost smothered by suitors, wearing a dress, looking…presentable. Raphael might not have recognized her had he not been told she was there. Her smile was strained but polite as she greeted the people around her. She was rather pretty when she was not dressed in shabby armor and her hair did not look like a rat’s nest, he thought.

He had not seen her for so long. He had of course heard about their success with defeating the Netherbrain and everything that had happened after. He also knew who the Crown of Karsus had been given to and how that had ended. Perhaps there was an opportunity here…

Tav looked over the crowd and her eyes fell on Raphael. Her eyes widened completely and the smile on her lips fell when she saw him. She immediately averted her eyes from him, acting like she never saw him. Raphael smiled widely.

“We will talk again later, Viola,” he said and kissed Lady Gist’s hand. “There is an old associate that I simply must talk to.”

Tav had almost forgotten about him amongst all the noise and all the people, particularly young men, who wanted to speak and dance with her. She was dancing with a young man who was her age. He seemed nice, but like all the others, he was dreadfully boring, and it was so painfully clear that he was trying to sell himself to her. She hated it. She hated all of it.

The music finally stopped, and she was freed from him. She smiled politely to him before curtsying. When she turned around, someone grasped around her waist and caught her hand as the next song started. She looked up and panicked. She tried to move away but Raphael’s grip on her waist was firm.

“Ah-ah, dear,” he said and began to lead the dance. “No reason to cause a scene.”

She was still staring at him with wide eyes and dug her nails into his shoulder as he lead the dance with complete ease.

“Why are you here?” she asked hurriedly with a frown while trying not to fall over her own feet.

“I am working,” he answered with a smile. “I would ask why you are here, but word travels quickly in these circles. It’s been a while, hasn’t it, dear? Does the noble life suit you?”

“I don’t need anything, and you are not getting my soul.”

Raphael chuckled deeply.

“You wound me, dear,” he said and spun her around. “Is it truly such an impossible thought that I simply wanted to hear how you were faring?”

“Yes,” she quickly answered. “I’m fine. I’m doing wonderful.”

“Splendid,” he purred with a smile. “Although…I am terribly sorry to hear about your little sweetheart. The God of Ambition, was it? At least it must be to some relief to you that one of you got what you wanted.”

She stepped down hard on Raphael’s foot. He groaned and tightened his grip on her.

“Whoops,” she said and smiled spitefully at him. “I’m still getting the hang of this dancing thing, I’m afraid.”

“Mm, yes. How clumsy of you,” he grumbled and then continued talking. “And now you are to be married to one of these fine men in here. Has anyone caught your eye?”

“You know I could just tell everyone in here what you are,” she warned.

“So no,” Raphael sighed. “Marriage…Such a dull concept, isn’t it? You have seen horrors beyond most mortal’s comprehension, beaten terrible odds, saved the world, and now you are soon to be a noble lady. Sitting pretty beside some fat patriar. Is that truly what you want?”

She looked at him with anger in her eyes. He knew the answer to his question, of course, but she was all too easy to rile up.

“I wanted him,” she confessed quietly with a frown. “That’s all I wanted.”

“And all he wanted was the crown,” Raphael said with feigned sympathy. “Now Gale Dekarios is a god of the Heavens. He got everything he wanted, and yet you lost the man you loved, and I the crown I craved for centuries. Poor us. Fate is cruel, my dear.”

She sneered at him. The song finally came to an end and Raphael let her go. He smirked at her and bowed. She headed straight for the balcony, grabbing a glass of champagne on her way. Raphael followed. She was not going to escape him so easily.

“You look stunning tonight, by the way,” she heard Raphael’s voice from behind her. “Any of these poor fools would be lucky to have you.”

She looked over her shoulder and glared at him.

“Piss off, devil,” she grumbled and took a sip of her champagne.

“I see that your dancing is not the only thing you will have to work on,” he said with a chuckle and leaned against the balcony railing beside her. “Those manners of yours are horrendous as ever. Hardly befitting of a noble lady.”

She leaned her back against the railing and looked at him with her arms crossed and a furious frown on her face.

“I know what you are doing, you know.”

“Oh? What am I doing, my dear?” Raphael asked with a wide smile at her.

“You are trying to lure me into something,” she said. “Trying to remind me of my past, what I lost, but oh you can ‘help’, isn’t that right? You can make it all go away and make me happy again, if only I sign my name on one of your contracts. So, I reiterate: Piss off.”

Someone was on their way out to the balcony. One of her suitors from the look of recognition in the young man’s eyes. Raphael snapped and made the door close and lock in his face without even looking over his shoulder.

“You have me all figured out, haven’t you?” Raphael purred. “No, Tav. I simply stumbled upon an old client who seems miserable with the way that everything has turned out. No matter how much you smile in there, you cannot convince me that this life is something you want.”

“It’s none of your concern,” she said firmly.

“Oh, but it pains me to see people like yourself drenched in so much misery,” he cooed with feigned sympathy. “And it is miserable, isn’t it? To be so close to greatness just to have it snatched away again and be forced to face the same old dreadful sense of normalcy in one’s life.”

It bothered her to no end to have him compare losing the Crown of Karsus to her losing the love of her life. She knew that a part of him was just taunting her for not making the choice of giving the Crown of Karsus to him, because things would have been different if she did. Gale would never have ascended if she had.

“We are not the same,” she said. “And I really do not need your shoulder to cry on.”

“Perish the thought. I am not pitying you. I am simply saying that we are not so different after all. We are simply…” he waved a hand as he looked for the right word. “Talking…Bonding. Isn’t that what your sort calls it?”

“Bonding?” she said and wrinkled her nose at the absurdity of his words. “Spare me your annoying sales tactics and get to the point. What do you want?”

“You,” he said casually and carefully caught her hand with his. “Not your hand in marriage, you understand, though I am sure the two of us could have an awful lot of fun together, and ambitious men do seem to be your type…”

When she did not remove her hand, Raphael smiled and snaked his other hand around her waist. He had her right where he wanted her, and his little theory had been correct: she was lonely, and she was desperate. He was almost salivating at the thought.

“I am proposing a partnership of a different sort entirely,” he purred and wrapped both of his arms around her waist. “One that can reignite that spark in your eyes and take you far away from this dull new life of yours. You won’t even have to give me your soul. You simply have to answer one little question…”

She was looking up at him with expectant eyes. She was interested and there was no doubt about it.

“What?” she asked.

“Your lover left you to pursue greater things,” Raphael stated and ran his hand slowly up and down her back. “You tried to convince him not to, but he didn’t listen to you. He left you here, all alone, forced to go back to a life you never wanted in the first place because you did not share his ambition. My question is this: do you still only want him, or is it something else you crave now? Is it love…or is it revenge you are after?”

Her breathing got slightly heavier as she thought, as if caught up in conflicting emotions.

“Revenge,” she admitted in a quiet voice after a while.

“Good,” Raphael purred with a wicked smile. “Then it is settled, is it not? I want the crown and you want revenge. You are possibly the only person he would ever let into the Heavens. We can both get what we want and let me assure you, I never forget those who helped me to power like your dear Gale did.”

“I’m not sure,” she said quietly as she looked up at him. “Gale is a god now. He might be watching over me. That could be a hindrance in your little plan.”

They were standing so close now and the way her eyes ever so briefly went to his lips did not go past him. He could easily give her a taste of that revenge she so desperately wanted, just to draw her in further.

“Indeed. He might be,” Raphael purred and smiled. “Should we give him a show then?”

Raphael pushed her further back against the railing with his body. One of his hands went to the back of her neck as he pulled her in for a kiss. She kissed him back eagerly. Her arms wrapped around his neck as she pulled him in further. It was a hungry kiss.

Raphael was no fool. He knew that it was all simply to anger her old flame, but that did not mean that he didn’t thoroughly enjoy her enthusiasm. They stopped when they heard a knock on the door to the balcony. They both looked and saw a group of nobles looking at them through the glass window.

Tav was blushing when Raphael looked back at her. He smiled and snapped his fingers to take them away to the House of Hope to further discuss their plans, away from the nobles and gods who might have been listening.

[lovebotmo]

like the movies

chapter four - the feathered visitor

series masterlist

pairing: theodore nott x reader

wc: 1675

author's note: so so grateful that you guys are enjoying the story so far!!! its been incredible to be inspired and motivated when it comes to writing. i appreciate those who let me know they want to be on the taglist - lmk if anyone else wants to be added!!!

also if i missed someone my apologies!!! first time putting a tag list together hehe

song inspiration: how sweet it is (to be loved by you) by marvin gaye

Clambering into the compartment containing your friends after separating from Theo, you are greeted with expectant silence. Ten eyes peer at you with varying emotions; curiosity, caution, surprise, excitement, and intrigue all seem to swim in the faces of your dear friends.

Slapping your hands onto your knees, you smile nervously at them. “Well, what is it?”

“Don’t keep us waiting!” urges Hannah, who’s practically vibrating with excitement. “What was that all about? Running after Nott of all people.”

Your brows furrow unconsciously, “What d’you mean?”

Ginny laughs at your apparent confusion. “Nuh uh, Y/n. We all saw you go after Nott, no need to be coy now.” She winks cheekily at you. “Are you two seeing each other?”

You sputter at her brashness, “Me and Theo? There’s—”

“It’s Theo now, is it?” Padma asks. “When did he become Theo, eh?” Padma nudges your shoulder with her own.

“Oh, shove it, Pads!” You could practically feel the red rising in your face and neck at the undivided attention now being paid to your very short, tiny, essentially minimal interaction with a male specimen. You felt like a research subject whenever your friends interrogated you like this. “I was just worried Theo was going to miss the train—a very normal thing to be worried about considering he’s my potion partner and I bloody well can’t use his brain if he’s stranded in Hogsmeade! Besides,” you said, pulling at the sleeves of your wooly sweater, “that fight between Malfoy and him looked downright awful.” At that, the girls abruptly halted their aggressive probing, uneasily remembering the spat that had taken place very publicly in The Three Broomsticks. All, except for Luna, who continued to peer at you with that typical all-knowing, dreamy look of hers that seemed to suggest she knew better.

As if there’s anything going on between Theo and me. I barely know the guy…or almost barely know him…kind of know him?

Shaking the disorganized thoughts from your head, you turned to the girls to continue the conversation that had abruptly stopped at the tavern. A train ride filled with trolley sweets, gossip, and uncontrollable laughter soon led to your arrival at Hogwarts, just in time for the evening meal.

Retiring to your room shortly after dinner, you found that your housemates’ beds were empty. You guess that they were likely meandering around the grounds before curfew. You savored the silence and stillness of the room. However, all too soon, it was interrupted by an odd sort of sound.

Clink.

At first you ignored it, thinking something had just shifted in your room.

Clink…Clink.

This time, your eyes swept across the room, searching for whatever could be causing that sound. It didn’t sound like a water drip, someone in heels, or even coins moving around in a coin purse.

Clinkclinkclinkclink!

As the sound increased in volume and frequency, you realized it was coming from the window of all places, even though you were elevated relatively high in the tower containing your bedchamber. That is to say, no person could have been outside your room without the aid of a broom or the flying charm. You cursed under your breathe that the window was glazed, meaning you couldn’t see what lay on the other side. Undergoing a momentary crisis of whether you should open the window, you decided in a split-second to just open it and hope for the best. However, you made sure to grab your wand.

Can’t be too careful now, can we, Y/n?

Your hand grasped at the brass handle, quickly swinging the frame open. An autumnal evening gust of wind greeted you, along with something else.

What. The fuck.

Perching on your windowsill, was a quaint tawny owl peering at you rather oddly. The bird cocked its brown and white feathered head as you did the same.

What the devil is a bloody owl doing up here?

“I don’t suppose you intended to come up here, did you?” Looking at the owl, you noticed it was clutching something in its claws, a small parcel of sorts. “Is that for me?”

As if answering, the owl flew past you and landed on your desk. Its head cocked once more as if wondering whether you were going to join it or not. Realizing you were standing dumbly in front of the window and letting all the warm air out, you shut it. You did not lock it, however, anticipating that your feathered friend would be departing shortly.

You joined the owl at your desk, sitting in your chair. You were now eye level with the mysterious bird, its dark eyes gazing into your own.

“May I?” you inquired, gesturing towards the little package in its clutches. The fowl relented, gently releasing it onto the wood of your desk. Before allowing yourself to rip into the bundle, you pulled out a small cannister of crickets you kept in one of your desk drawers for when you visited your own owl in the aviary. Lightly placing it in front of the owl, you allowed it to treat itself while opening the unknown gift.

Inside, you found a small package of caramel creams, just like those you had gifted to Mr. Flume a few short hours ago.

“How…?” You looked to the bird who was still pleasing itself with your offering of crickets.

You couldn’t begin to wonder at who would have known to gift you that particular candy, who would have noticed your quick interaction among the thick throng of students that had filled Honeydukes earlier. No one had stood out to you in the little time you had spent in the candy store, wholly preoccupied with your candy exchange.

Where could they have even bought it from? It’s not like Mr. Flume even stocks this specific sweet, no matter how much I may beg the man to.

“You must have been flying for ages to bring these to me, I reckon.”

“Hoot.”

Laughing at the short, clipped response of the owl, your eyes noticed a small piece of parchment paper within the parcel. Grasping and opening it quickly, your eyes were met with the same script you had seen on the previous note that had accompanied the moly bouquet currently residing on your nightstand. Once more, the note was succinct and saccharine.

Y/n,

Sweets for you, sweetheart.

Yours,

Teddy

“Seems your owner fancies me,” you said to the owl as you carefully refolded the note. “I don’t suppose you would be able to give me a clue as to who they are?”

“Hoot.”

Sighing, you replied, “Alright, alright. I won’t badger you for answers.” You rose from your chair, intending to allow the plumed messenger to return to the aviary. The bird flew from its perch on your desk to your shoulder, its head gently rubbing against your cheek. You smiled at the little show of affection. Once more, you opened your window, allowing your avian visitor to rejoin the skies. Looking back at the caramel creams and clutching the note to your chest, a warm feeling began to leak out of your heart. Whoever your admirer was, he was rather…sweet.

A few caramel creams later, you were sprawled on your bed and surrounded by your friends as you recounted the entire rendezvous with the tawny owl. You shared the sweets among your friends, but you kept the contents of the note to yourself. Your friends had already seen the first note and none of them had recognized the handwriting. There was no harm done, really.

Besides, you thought, it’s kind of nice to keep something between just me and this elusive ‘Teddy.’

“You didn’t recognize the owl, did you?” asked Ginny. “Godric knows everybody can tell when I’ve sent an owl. That bloody bird, Errol, is hard to miss.” She gives you a vexed look that makes you chuckle.

“No, it looked like any other owl I’d have seen in the aviary. Anyway, there are hundreds of owls here, they’re not exactly easy to differentiate.”

“Well,” Padma says, “at the very least, we know that your little admirer is a third year or older.”

Hannah’s face shows her confusion, “How do you figure?”

“They were in Honeydukes, weren’t they?” Padma shrugs, “Whoever he is, he has to be, at minimum, thirteen years old to go to Hogsmeade.”  

Groaning, you flop back onto your bed, hands covering your face in dismay. “Blimey, I hadn’t even considered it might be someone younger than me. What if it is a third year? Fucking hell, I’ll never be able to live it down.”

Moving your hands from your face, Hermione smiles gently at you. “If it is a third year, which I seriously doubt, you’ll be gentle in letting them down. No big deal.”

“I’d be a laughingstock, ‘Mione,” you say grumpily.

“No, you won’t, Y/n,” replies Hannah. “Besides, it’s just the six of us that knows, right?”

“About that…” Ginny looks at you sheepishly. “I may or may not have possibly, accidentally let it slip when I was perhaps…potentially talking with Lavender…”

The redhead’s confession gets you to shoot up quickly from your horizontal position. “You did what?” You toss at a pillow at her, which, with her incredible athleticism, she easily intercepts. You frown. “Lavender is possibly the worst gossip I’ve ever met. I’d be surprised if Filch didn’t know about it.”

“It was an accident, promise!” Ginny exclaims, “Lavender asked if you were seeing anybody—I think she’s interested in Lee Jordan—so, I suppose she was trying to determine whether or not you were—”

“Ginny.”

“…Yes, Y/n?”

“I’m going to give you until the count of three.”

“Count of three—what for?”

“One.”

“Oh please, Y/n. I didn’t mean to—”

“Two.”

“For the love of Merlin—”

“Three.” At your last count, you sprint at the girl who starts to run from you as you chase her with your wand. She sharts to shriek with laughter, dashing as far from your incurrent wrath as possible.

“You’re going to get it, Weasley!”

taglist: @melllinaa, @randomgurl2326, @lovelyygirl8, @abaker74, @mypolicemanharryyy, @vanevafu, @laceandsuch, @agent-tempest, @themarauderswife7 & @adoraspace

[mrsbuckybarnes1917]

9: ONE

Chapter 8 <MASTERLIST > Chapter 10

SUMMARY: You run away with the Winter Soldier, a man who has recently discovered his identity and is in search of his truth.

Word Count: 3.8k

Warning: SMUT: Mutual hand job, Fugitive situation — If there is any more you find not listed here please be sure to let me know so I can add it.

Your heart was pounding, the blood rushing through your ears so loudly that you could barely hear anything he was saying. There was a feeling bubbling up inside you, a potent mix of excitement, fear, and anticipation that threatened to consume you whole. Your breath came hard and fast as these turbulent emotions threatened to overwhelm you, your chest rising and falling rapidly. But through it all, your hand remained firmly in his, a grounding anchor amidst the storm raging within. 

The darkness had fallen early where the clandestine facility was situated, far removed from the trappings of real civilization. The dismal weather offered convenient camouflage, the overcast skies and biting wind masking your presence as you scanned the area, searching the shadows for any sign of your soldat. Just as the feeling of dread began to creep in, his hand suddenly clamped over your mouth, muffling the surprised yelp that escaped your lips at his abrupt appearance behind you. In that moment, time seemed to stand still as the world narrowed to just the two of you, hidden away from prying eyes in the enveloping darkness. The adrenaline coursing through your veins was nearly overwhelming, but his steady presence grounded you, reminding you why you had risked so much to be here, in this precarious but electrifying moment.

“Shhh, Kotyonok. No noises.”

His voice was a deep, authoritative whisper, the harshness of his tone at odds with the gentleness of his touch against your mouth. He held you firmly, his body a solid presence pressed against your back, his hand a warning against any further sounds. His breath was warm against your ear as he spoke again. "Follow me.”

You followed him, your feet stumbling occasionally over the uneven snow-covered ground. The world around you was a blur, the snowflakes dancing in your vision like swirling stars. His hand was a strong, guiding presence, pulling you along without pause or hesitation. He moved with purpose, his steps swift and sure, leading you down alleyways and side streets, always keeping to the shadows, avoiding the dim pools of light cast by the street lamps.

As you moved, your mind was racing, desperately trying to come up with an escape plan. But there had been no time, no opportunity to discuss anything of the sort. You were both acting on instinct alone, following Soldat's lead blindly, trusting him to keep both of you safe. You could sense his tension in the rigidity of his body, the way his grip on your hand tightened every time you stumbled or slowed. He was on high alert, his senses sharp, his eyes constantly scanning the shadows for any hint of danger. 

Soldat's mind was a maelstrom of thoughts and calculations. He had a plan, but it was not one he had been able to fully think through. It was more instinct than strategy, more desperate gamble than foolproof escape. He had spent precious minutes scouting the area before coming for you, searching for the most efficient route out of the town and into the vast expanse of wilderness beyond. It was a dangerous venture, one fraught with risks and uncertainties.

"Where’re we going?" You whispered.

Soldat paused for a moment, pulling you into a small alleyway between two buildings. The shadows concealed you well, the only light coming from a single, dim street lamp at the end of the alley. He turned to face you, his eyes meeting yours in the darkness. "Somewhere safe," he replied, his voice a rough whisper. "Somewhere they won't find us.”

"Where, Milyy?"

Soldat's heart clenched at your question. He wished he had a better answer, a definite destination he could name. But he didn't. All he had was a rough plan, one that relied heavily on luck and the element of surprise. He sighed deeply, leaning against the cold brick wall behind him. His eyes flicked downwards, avoiding your gaze for a moment.

"We're going east. Towards the river. There's a farmhouse there. It's isolated and remote. We should be able to lie low for a while.”

Soldat gently pulled you along once again, his hand still firmly around yours. He moved carefully, silently through the shadows, his footsteps making almost no sound against the snow. You followed him, your footsteps slow and faltering. The snow was starting to fall more heavily now, making the ground slippery and treacherous, but Soldat seemed unfazed, his stride never faltering as he made his way towards the river.

Soldat felt you stumble, his grip on your hand tightening as he slowed his pace momentarily, allowing you to catch up. He kept his gaze straight ahead, his expression unreadable in the shadows. He knew you were struggling to keep up with him, your steps slower and more labored, but he couldn't afford to slow down. Every minute counted, and he could feel the urgency of the situation like a weight on his shoulders.

“Sorry, Kotyonok.”

He could see the tiredness in your eyes, the trembling of your body as you struggled to keep up with him. It tugged at his heart, but there was no time to rest, no time to stop and catch your breath. He glanced back at you, your face barely visible in the darkness. His voice was a mere whisper, a soft, ragged edge to it.

"We're almost there," he reassured you. "Just a little further.”

Just when you thought you couldn't go any further, Soldat pointed out something in the distance. You followed the direction of his gaze, your eyes struggling to make out anything in the falling snow and fading light. For a moment, you saw nothing, just the endless expanse of white snow and shadowy trees. But then, faintly, you saw a silhouette flickering in the moonlit distance.

Soldat nodded, his grip on your hand tightening momentarily. "That's it," he said. "The farmhouse. We're almost there.”

Soldat helped you settle by the fireplace, wrapping the blankets tight around you as you shivered slightly. Lighting a fire was out of the question. Even the smallest flicker of light in the window could give away your location and alert your pursuers to your location. The farmhouse was small but cozy, the shelter and isolation offering a much-needed respite from the bitter cold outside.

He pulled you closer to him, the blanket wrapped tightly around both of you as you sought each other's warmth. His flesh arm was wrapped around your shoulders, his body a solid presence against yours. He was silent for a moment, his body was tense, his senses on high alert as he listened for any signs of danger outside. You watched him listening to the quiet stillness of the house and the faint sound of the falling snow outside.

He tensed for a moment at your touch, his body instinctively responding to any contact. But then he relaxed, his muscles unfurling under your hand. He looked at you, his gaze soft and tender in the dim light.

"Sorry," you whispered.

He shook his head slightly, his gaze locked on yours."Don't be sorry," he whispered back. “Your touch... it grounds me. It helps.” He placed his metal hand over yours, covering it with his own. The cool metal contrasted against the warmth of your skin. He gave your hand a gentle squeeze, a silent reassurance.

"Do you hear anything?”

Soldat tilted his head slightly, his senses straining to pick up any sound in the stillness of the farmhouse. His ears were tuned to the slightest noise, his body taut and ready for action at a moment's notice. He shook his head slightly after a minute. "No," he said softly. "Nothing. Just the sound of the snow outside. We're safe... for now, at least.”

You were both silent, contemplating your choices, the decision you had made to flee from HYDRA.

"Tell me again," he asked, suddenly. Soldat's voice was quiet, but there was an intensity behind his words. His eyes flicked to your face, searching your expression in the low light.

You looked at him in confusion for a moment, trying to grasp his meaning. And then you understood. He wanted to hear it again, to remember the words that had started this journey. You took a deep breath, gathering your thoughts before speaking softly. "You’re James Bucky Barnes," you said, pronouncing each syllable carefully. "Not the Winter Soldier. You’re more than what they made you. You’re free.”

“You’re from Brooklyn, New York. You were born in 1917, on March 10th. Your best friend is Steve Rogers, Captain America. You fought in the second world war, in the 107th unit but you were part of a special team called the Howling Commandos.”

Soldat - Bucky - was silent as you spoke, his eyes fixed on your face as you recited his history. He drank in your words, processing each one with an intensity that was almost physical. With every name you mentioned - Steve Rogers, the Howling Commandos - the memories stirred deep within him, faint at first but growing stronger with each passing moment.

He sat frozen, his breath coming in short, sharp puffs. The words were like a lifeline, pulling him back from the darkness of his past, reminding him who he truly was. His eyes never left yours as you spoke, his expression intense, as if he was trying to hold onto every syllable, to commit each word to memory. With every new detail, his expression shifted, recognition and realization slowly washing over his face. His eyes widened slightly, his expression almost pained, as if the memories were both a revelation and a torment.

"Buc-ee..."

His voice was rough, the syllables coming out slowly as if his mouth was unaccustomed to forming the words. He repeated it again, the nickname rolling off his tongue with an effort. The foreign sound of it was unfamiliar and yet, somehow, it felt right. He repeated it, his voice rough and ragged.

"Bucky," he repeated, his lips forming around the syllables. He looked at you then, his eyes searching for confirmation, for reassurance that he had said it correctly. He fell silent for a moment, his gaze distant as he seemed to lose himself in his thoughts. But then he blinked, his eyes clearing and sharpening once again as he focused on you.

“Why?” he asked.

You tilted your head slightly, not quite understanding his question. "Why what?"

He looked at you intently, his eyes studying your face in the dim light. He seemed to wrestle with himself for a moment, struggling to find the words to express what he was feeling.

Finally, he spoke again, his voice a low, barely audible whisper. "Why did you help me?”

It was a question you'd been asking yourself. Why had you left the security of your position to run away with a man who didn't even know who he was?

You had contemplated your decision the night before as you lay awake, waiting for him to come out of cryostasis. "Because you deserve more, because this isn't who you are... because... I love you.”

Bucky's eyes widened at your words. He hadn't expected that. But as he looked at you - your eyes, your face, your expression - he saw the truth in them. He understood then, the depth of your feelings for him, how much you had cared for him even when he hadn't remembered you. It was a strange sort of paradox, your intense connection and devotion to a man who was both himself and yet not himself at the same time.

He felt a mixture of emotions then, a cocktail of gratitude, guilt, and something more tender he didn't quite want to name. His heart gave a painful lurch in his chest, and he found himself struggling to speak for a moment. He was not used to expressing himself, not emotionally, not about things like love. But for you, he would try.

"I..." he started, his voice hoarse. "I don't deserve you.”

"You deserve so much more. You deserve to know who you are, you deserve to live a life of your choosing.”

Bucky stared at you, he had spent so long not thinking about what he deserved, living in the shadow of his past actions, that your words were almost too much to bear. He took a shaky breath, his gaze not leaving yours. "I don't know who I am. There's so much in my head... memories, thoughts, feelings... I don't know what's real and what's not.”

“Let me help you.”

He wanted desperately to believe you, to trust you, but there was a part of him that was still wary, still distrustful. He swallowed hard, his hand clenching unconsciously in the fabric of the blanket. "You'd... do that? You'd help me?" he whispered.

"I'm here, aren't I?”

A small, humorless chuckle escaped Bucky's lips. You were right. You were here, risking everything to help him, to be with him. He looked at you, his eyes softening as he took in your expression.

His right hand came up to cup your cheek, his flesh and bone fingers gently caressing your skin. "Yeah," he said softly. "You are.”

Bucky's touch was gentle but possessive as he leaned in to kiss you. His lips were soft, a stark contrast to the rough stubble on his face. He tasted of bitter cold and a hint of fear, and yet, underneath it all, there was something else - something undeniably warm and familiar.

He pulled you closer to him, his hand moving from your cheek to the back of your neck, keeping you closer as he deepened the kiss, his tongue seeking entry into your mouth. Bucky felt the shift in you, the way you pressed closer to him, seeking more contact, more intimacy. His touch was a desperate caress, his fingers tracing the curve of your back, your thighs, every inch of skin he could reach under your thick coat. He pulled down the zipper, longing for more.

Bucky's hands stilled as he felt you shiver under his touch. He looked at you, his eyes dark and intense as he realized the effect his touch was having on you. A spark of concern flickered in his gaze, and he shifted you slightly so you were tucked tightly against him, his arms wrapped protectively around your waist.

"Are you cold?" he asked, his voice husky.

"It's fine, I'll be fine," you answered, dismissively.

He raised an eyebrow at your response, his expression saying that he didn't believe you. Bucky reached out, his fingers gently tucking a strand of hair behind your ear. He studied your face for a moment, taking in the way your teeth were clenched together to keep yourself from shivering.

"You're shivering," he pointed out, his voice a low murmur.

Bucky's hands moved gently as he zipped up your coat, his touch careful and considerate. He knew you were frustrated, wanting more, but his concern for your well-being outweighed his own desires. Sitting back, he studied your face, his expression torn between pulling you into his arms and his need to keep you safe. As you placed your hands on his face, Bucky felt the warmth of your skin against his, your touch gentle and soothing. He closed his eyes, pressing his cheek into your palm and savoring the sensation - a tenderness he was unaccustomed to experiencing.

"I just... I don't want you to get hurt… because of me," he whispered.

Bucky's breath caught as you kissed him, his body instantly reacting to your touch. He wrapped his arms around you, pulling you in tight against his chest, craving to feel you, to have you as close as could be. His lips moved with yours, the kiss starting soft and tender, but soon intensifying with desire and passion. He deepened the kiss, his tongue exploring your mouth, one hand gently cradling the back of your head, holding you firmly against him.

"Still feeling cold, Kotyonok?" He murmured against your cheek.

His whispered words, the low timbre of his voice, and the gentle caress of his lips against your skin sent a delicious shiver down your spine, igniting a smoldering heat within you. You instinctively pressed your body closer to his, craving the warmth and comfort of his touch.

You let out a soft, breathless chuckle, your voice a little hoarse as you spoke. "Not anymore," you whispered.

"Kotyonok, can I... feel you?” Bucky's words were a soft, hesitant question, his voice a low whisper in the quiet of the farmhouse. His gentle fingers traced down your clothed arm, the warmth of his touch perceptible through the fabric. Your eyes met his as you considered his question.

Bucky's hand slid around your waist, dipping beneath the waistband of your pants, as you shuffled closer to him. His touch was warm and possessive, pulling you firmly against his body. A wall of heat radiated from him, his breath hot against your ear as he spoke. Slowly, deliberately, his fingers traced lazy circles over your skin, his touch gentle but purposeful.

He spoke in a ragged, husky whisper, "You feel so soft."

Exhausted from the day's stress and harsh weather, you sighed with relief as you were finally able to rest and be cared for.

Bucky heard your weary sigh, and it stirred an ache deep within him. He knew you were exhausted, worn down by the tumultuous events that had unfolded. Yet, despite the immense stress and peril, you remained by his side, still allowing his touch. Holding you close, his solid form anchored against your back, Bucky's hand moved in slow, gentle caresses. His fingers traced delicate patterns on your skin, eliciting soft moans and sighs to escape your lips.

"Just let me take care of you," he murmured softly.

Bucky's breath caught as you parted your legs, hooking your left knee over his right thigh. His hands gripped you tightly, responding to the heat of your skin against his. His body reacted instinctively, muscles going rigid at the intimate contact. Desire burned in his eyes as he looked at you, his fingers moving slowly, deliberately. He felt your body responding, your breath hitching, your muscles clenching under his touch.

Bucky's body stiffened involuntarily as your hand slid into his pants. For a moment, he tensed up but made no attempt to stop or pull away. Instead, he buried his face in the crook of your neck, his lips seeking the sensitive spot behind your ear, where the familiar scent of your shampoo lingered. The hand on your thigh tightened slightly as your fingers found their mark, drawing a low, rumbling groan from deep within his chest.

"Easy, Kotyonok," he rasped, his voice a gruff whisper.

Bucky's breath came in ragged gasps as your hand moved over him, your touch igniting a fire in his veins. He fought to maintain his composure, attempting to mirror your movements with his own fingers, sliding them up and down your slick folds. Burying his face in the crook of your neck, he sought your skin with his lips, grazing your pulse point with his teeth as he fought for control. Yet, your touch overwhelmed him, eliciting an involuntary physical reaction he could not restrain.

"That's it, Soldat. You like that, Milyy?”

Bucky's breath caught in his throat as you addressed him as 'Soldat'. The name felt cold, distant, and out of place. It no longer fit, not with the way he was feeling, not with the intimate touch of your hand. Bucky pulled back, his eyes locking onto yours, a desperate plea in his gaze. "Not Soldat," he ground out, his voice rough and urgent. "Call me Bucky. Please."

"Bucky," you moaned.

Bucky's breath hitched as he heard his name on your lips, the desire in your voice making something primal flare inside him.

"Tell me!" he growled. "Tell me again... who am I?”

He looked down at you, his gaze dark and intense as you spoke.

“You are James Bucky Barnes… you were born…” you whimpered softly as his fingers rubbed your clit. “...in Brooklyn… New York… in 1917.”

Bucky's gentle yet deliberate touch accompanied his soft-spoken words as he took control. He sensed your responsive movements and the soft whimpers escaping your lips, which ignited a reciprocal reaction within him.

"I fought in the Second World War," he continued, "and was captured by HYDRA and turned into the Winter Soldier. But now, I am free. I’m Bucky.”

"Oh, Bucky," you moaned.

Hearing his name on your lips, hearing the way you moaned it, sent a jolt of desire through Bucky's body. He couldn't deny it anymore, the heat between you was building, and it was intense.

He pulled you closer to him, his hand continuing its slow, deliberate movements. His other hand came up to cup your face, his touch gentle but possessive.

"Say it again," he commanded, his voice a low rumble. "Say my name, Kotyonok.”

"Bucky!" You stroked him faster. 

Your breathless, urgent utterance of his name sent Bucky reeling. Tension coiled through his body as your hand moved over him, quickening with mounting urgency. He pulled you in closer, face buried in your neck, lips trailing over your skin as he panted against you, voice a low, ragged whisper.

"Yes, like that," he gasped, his hips arching into your touch.

"Come, Bucky,” you encouraged him gently. “That's it, come for me.”

Bucky let out a strangled gasp as you encouraged him, his body responding instinctually to your command. Your words and your touch were all too much, and he couldn't hold back anymore. With a low, guttural cry, he came undone, his release pulsing over your hand. He buried his face in the crook of your neck, his breath coming in shuddering gasps as he tried to regain control of himself, his body trembling against yours.

"Fuck,” he whispered. “Love you, Kotyonok.”

Bucky's fingers resumed their movements, his touch more urgent and insistent as he focused on your pleasure. Desperate to give you the same intense sensations you had provided him, he kissed and nipped at your skin, his fingers circling your clit in slow, tight motions. He yearned to hear you cry out his name, could feel your body tightening in anticipation, knowing he had pushed you to the edge.

"Bucky, oh Bucky... I'm... I'm gonna...”

He continued his ministrations, his fingers relentless as he worked you towards your release, his breath hot against your ear as he whispered your name again and again, a low, ragged incantation.

"Come for me, sweetheart. I want to hear you. Let go.”

“BUCKY!” Your shout was swallowed by the wind howling around the desolate farmhouse.

Chapter 8 <MASTERLIST > Chapter 10

[kiweegamez]

Hypnofury (May redesign. + Colour Alts)

MY DUMBASS REALISED I NEVER EVEN PUT THE LORE IN ARTFIGHT, SO YIPPEE. Also it was very similar to Toothless?

Ok so you may think the measurements are insane, look at Toothless for ref, this variant is slightly bigger than him.

So the Hypnofury, a variant in close relation to the Nightfury. Hypnofuries were said to reside with Flightmares when this was less than likely as this one had been seen fighting with Flightmare on sight. Hypnofuries are critically endangered there’s probably like 20 left. Yet they are no where near each other, being scattered everywhere.

They seem to reside in darker forest or cave areas, easily attracted by glowing algae. This one is a female. If seen next to a male, the difference is that the males are wider and smoother having less prominent fins. This species is extremely female dominant so it would be a miracle to have a male left.

Originally they had much smaller wings and were all together a lot smaller, therefore they were good for hunting sports. (As they used to be terrible terror size). But over time they became much larger like the current photo. Now the reason this is actually named a Hypnofury is because of the patterns, as they do consume glowing algae like a Flightmare (so competitive for food) they can make their patterns flash or glow for a bit. As rare as it is, the patterns confuse other dragons in low darkness due to how some (especially on the weird things on the head) can look like a dragon face, well, roughly resemble. And by moving around enough with the pulsing patterns they can temporarily charm other dragons (hypnotise them) while if two or more Hypnofuries are near they move around in a group, therefore the display is more effective and mesmerising. DIET: The diet of the Hypnofuries is rather odd, as it seems to selectively eat eels, glowing algae, fish, turtles, apples, and honeycomb. Hypnofuries just like their close relatives the Nightfury are agile terrors to Viking kind. They are better swimmers than Nightfuries given their larger spinal fins and have stronger legs built for swimming rather than running.

Also they have a very ill temper if in bright areas, given it’s harder for them to see, but this can be trained out of them. Other than that, they are rather curious, they remember faces and hold serious grudges, however they do like shiny objects and will often leave them underwater. They will also sometimes offer trades, sometimes having junk or stuff from a random traveler. (You can’t tell me she didn’t steal Hiccup’s peg leg once outside of the show 🫵)

They do NOT have retractable teeth.

Now the Hypnofuries roar is much more high pitched and echoey, while purposely pulsing their tone, this is due to their modified lungs, as they tend to look for bodies of water to swim and hunt they will sometimes even hide underwater waiting to ambush dragons (if desperate enough for food). They can be underwater for 40 mins until they need fresh air, however if currents are strong are choppy water conditions this number can drop drastically. Back to the species roar, this is for better underwater communication rather than on land. As their diaphragm is much stronger it also creates somewhat of a whistling grunt. So a very distinguishable sound from the Nightfury.

Roars:

POSSIBLE COLOUR VARIANTS.

Might draw them all officially one day.

[konnosaurus]

iiiiit's sonny!!

sonny is such an intriguing little character to me. i really like him, but am very curious about his character and his placement in the series. i'm gonna stick a few thoughts about him (and diesel, honestly, and their interesting dynamic) under the cut!

even though sonny first appeared in the Last Series of the show, he felt like he had been designed with longevity in mind (at least to me!). he had personal character relationships with thomas (positive), diesel (complicated) and james (intriguing). unlike a lot of the characters introduced at the very of the series run, sonny was given these relationships that made you feel he could have his own character growth and also influence other characters and their stories.

sonny and diesel specifically are an interesting pair. diesel had only relatively recently had his minor/major redemption arc in springtime for diesel, but more recent relevant episodes, in my opinion, are diesel glows away & diesel do right. these episodes have a very interesting understanding of diesel which honestly remind me quite a bit of james (which is probably odd to say!). he thinks he is great, and that his presence makes the railway a better place, but in reality… he isn't really helping all that much because his high opinion of himself makes him do his jobs worse than if he just… tried to do them himself. it makes the other engines have a worse opinion of him than if he just talked to them as equals.

this is where sonny comes in. diesel, who has learnt through his past few episodes that he can't make other engines like him by being a nuisance and that he must put his own effort in to do his jobs correctly, is introduced to a new engine who has no preconceptions about him at all. in fact, he seems to enjoy his presence! but this is a whole new thing to diesel, who has not really had a chance to have a new interaction without the other engine involved having been told about his ways~~. while he probably hadn't had toooo many interactions with nia before diesel glows away, it was never implied she was unaware of the way he is, where as this is clearly all new to sonny.

these interactions between sonny and diesel show the two growing close very quickly- neither has really had any close buddies at any recent point, as far as we know. nobody seems to particularly enjoy the company of diesel, and sonny has been implied to have been on his own engine-wise, with only baz and bernie for a while at least. sonny is shown as inherently good- he tries to help james, he tries to do the other engines jobs. diesel as shown as inherently bad- even though he has grown, and we have seen him grow, his first instinct when given the opportunity is to use someone for his own gain. but it is different this time! when diesel causes something to go wrong for somebody else, he apologises without having to make it a whole ~thing~, which was exactly what he struggled with in springtime for diesel. he could apologise, then, but not directly. now he was able to manage it!

sonny managed to bring out the best in diesel, get a direct apology from him ((and also a direct (though sliiiightly reluctant) apology from james)), and get himself into the good books of other engines in essentially one day. though this happens quite a lot in the childrens-morals stories of thomas, there is something about him that brought that out in the characters in a way that felt entirely natural. and i just think that is neat!!

[sunsetsover]

im finally rewatching ep 3 and i remembered that i meant to make a post abt how captain christ is sus as hell. as in this whole scheme he's got going with kant to me feels less like a legitimate (or as close to legit as it can be given the circumstances) investigation into a string of high profile murders and more like some kind of personal vendetta he has, maybe even w lilly specifically. and i have no basis for that other than how odd christ's reaction was when kant told him fadel and bison have different dads. idk the vibes are just off. there's something not right abt him. the whole situation stinks.

speaking of lilly tho i don't believe for one minute she's got her sons out there ridding the streets of bad men in some act of vigilante justice. bison literally calls it out in the first scene, saying that he'd seen their next target helping poor kids on the news or whatever. and yeah ok bad men often do good deeds, and ofc lilly uses that to try to belittle bison by saying that he's always been easily fooled by appearances. which is a little on the nose given the whole kant thing, but i think that actually the point was that she's referring to herself. as in she's the one doing the fooling this whole time w her conditional kindness and her weaponised warmth. helping poor kids while doing bad things behind the scenes. yknow. a common modus operandi in these circles i'm sure.

anyways my original point is that she tries to make out bison is naive and silly for even asking but at the same time the reasoning she offers them for why that guy has to die is vague as fuck. 'he's the man behind corruptions, drugs, human trafficking, and so much more'??? she might as well have said he steals food straight out of the mouths of the kids he claims to be helping too seeing as tho we're just saying shit. like girl cmon. you're an entrepreneur. i know you've trained those boys not to question you at all but lets try a little bit harder queen <3

i also do think lilly had smth to do w whatever happened to fadel's ex and that that might be why he lied to her when she asked if bison is seeing someone. at least partially. if he knows what she's capable of in that sense then he'd want to keep that shit under wraps, not for kant's sake but for bison's. i've said it before but bison's ignorance only exists bc fadel has worked his ass off to keep it that way. i feel like fadel knows, or at least suspects, that lilly isn't the woman she wants them to believe she is. but ofc fadel isn't gonna tell bison that. ignorance is bliss, and even if it wasn't that's their mother. her and bison clearly have a (relatively) warm relationship. fadel wouldn't want to ruin that with the truth.

also i don't trust style's dad either. why include a character in the intro that is seemingly so unimportant? what the fuck is up with the whole 'boonterm' thing? style's dad is obviously at LEAST mechanic running in these 'bad guy' circles considering style had to drop off the secretary's car to her. which like. idk what kinda bougie ass mechanics rich ppl be having but having your car dropped off to you - by the mechanic's son no less - at some random host bar instead of having to go pick it up seems like special treatment. like maybe it's not just a simple mechanic/customer relationship yk

and u know what as i'm typing this i'm thinking about the spiderweb motif that occurs in the show, first in kant's tattoo and then with keen in the intro (and he has spiderweb tattoos too i think?) and how everyone speculated they may be exes and maybe they are. but like. i also think it's more than that. like i just think that in this show there are a lot of people caught in a lot of webs who haven't yet realised they're the fly, not the spider. yknow.

[peppershark]

WOLFER --- The real California history behind the Tomione Fic

Convict Lake Camp (OwensValleyHistory.com)

When I was a kid, my family frequently visited Bishop, California. I can still feel the light-headed enchantment of hopping out of the van at a relative's green, creek-watered ranch shadowed by towering granite faces of the High Sierras. The dusty road and sage-sharp aroma propelled my imagination two hundred years into the past.

Wolfer is set in 1890 Bishop Creek, and while some of the location names are changed to fit the story, the town really had ranching barons like the Sacred 28 families, churches which exerted certain levels of social power with the well-to-do folk, boarding houses for mill workers and on-farm worker housing for fruit pickers and cowboys--or perhaps the odd wolfer.

It's amazing what you can dig up when you're procrastinating working on your WIP, lol. I did a lot of initial research while writing a Gingerrose fic set in post Civil War Bishop Creek.

Here are some things I found.

Main Street, Bishop Creek 1880 (OwensValleyHistory.com)

In Chapter 1, Tom rides down Main Street to the marshal's office (played by a grudging Severus Snape) and runs into Hermione.

Way off into the upper right you can see the steeple of the First Baptist Church on Main Street.

East Line Street, Bishop Creek (OwensValleyHistory.com)

Tom chases Hermione to Line Street, where he pushes her up against the Brown's Machine Shed, which is of course re-named to fit Lavender Brown's family.

(OwensValleyHistory.com)

Check out that snow! Sitting at 4,000 feet of elevation in the foothills of the East Sierras, the snow can get quite voluminous.

W.D. Roberts Ranch, Round Valley (OwensValleyHistory.com)

The ranch near the dry saltbeds of Owens Lake where Draco visits Harry, (by way of Mad Eye Moody) might have looked like this.

Cerro Gordo photo taken some time between 1871 - 1879 (OwensValleyHistory.com

We get a brief glimpse of the Cerro Gordo silver mine when Draco and Harry ride off into the sunset together for a night of wild debauchery. The brothels and bawdy houses within these sprawling mining towns would have perhaps been some of the only public places for late 19th-century gays to be themselves. Miss Lola's was among the more famous, and I'm struggling to find the website where I originally learned this this but I believe she hosted queer sex workers and provided space for an early LGBTQ+ scene.

The silver mine itself brought together a richly diverse group of fortune seekers. I accessed California census documents and found that while Bishop Creek was mostly white, Cerro Gordo had a much more diverse population (interestingly all marked with 'I', even Latinx names).

I did a phone interview with the Inyo Historical Society and chatted for an hour with a local historian, telling him I was getting context for a novel. (He didn't need to know that my novel was also a fanfic, hahaha.) The historian told me the mine had Mexican, Black, Chinese, and Indigenous populations working as miners, teamsters (people who drive wagons), cooks, brick masons, farm laborers and all kinds of interesting jobs related to running the mine.

Main Street in Bishop Creek, 1878 (OwensValleyHistory.com

One thing that sticks out in my mind from the conversation with the historian is how the white and Mexican ranchers demolished the irrigation canals the Numuu Indigenous tribes had dug to create a green landscape in Owens Valley. Native Americans have been 'farming' America's landscape for thousands of years in a low-impact way. In Chapter 4, Tom muses on this detail as he's setting a wolf trap on Rosier's ranch.

Perhaps the most illuminating account of the region comes from Sarah Winnemucca, daughter of Chief Truckee (after whom the town is named). Sarah travelled as an advocate for Indigenous rights and cataloged her experience and the story of white settler colonization in her book, Life Among the Pauites: Their Wrongs and Claims which you can read for free here.

Thank you for diving into California history with me!

Read Wolfer here.

[senka-mesecine]

Would you be able to write a list of Barnes relationship headcanons or at the very least your perception of what Barnes would be like as a husband? I absolutely adore your writings about Platoon since there’s so little fan content for it around! <3 I appreciate what you do

-

― Admittedly, it is fairly hard to imagine Barnes living a civilian life seeing as how he's pretty much synonymous with combat and to quote Rhah, war's his high, which is exactly why I think he'd make his civilian life so as to as closely resemble the army as possible, and whether he'd do this consciously or subconsciously or both is up for debate, but I feel the structure of his day-to-day existence outside of a platoon hierarchy isn't all that different from his time in the 'Nam --- meaning that I envision that as a spouse he'd be a working man. Entirely proud of it too. He thinks that's what a real man ought to be and that anything other than that isn't ought to be. He's the toiling from dawn to dusk type. Hard manual laborer. He still finds a way to bark orders at others and instill fear and admiration into their bones, to the degree he might as well still be in the military because he sure isn't here giving himself any breaks just because he's rotated back into the world from the bush. In fact, there's no difference between now and then. He's soldiering out there and he's soldiering now. He gives commands there and he gives them in his civilian life too. It's that ingrained thing that cannot be shed. In fact, it is very possible to imagine him going mercenary post-Vietnam and seeking out the next war available because it's what he is.

― That being said, married life with him is...shockingly simple, I think. Why? Because I think of him as a man of routine; a professional deformational of his military days. He likes breakfast with the spouse. Dinners. Suppers. Waking up early. Coming back home at night to them. The odd match of poker. Sharing a bottle of whiskey. Having a smoke. Living off the beaten track somewhere. And it almost comes off as weirdly idyllic and downright wholesomely pastoral that he might practice isolationism precisely because he views his home life as a separate bubble positioned against the rest of the world almost as if the domesticity he has with you is a base and everything outside of it is potentially a minefield or enemy territory. It's not necessarily said outright, of course, but, Barnes doesn't much care for the comings and goings of the outside world and if he lives with his spouse on a sort of societal margin, he doesn't have to follow its rules and he doesn't much care to anyway. I can visualize him going back to the Hill Country of East Tennessee and as far away from any rustle and bustle as humanly possible. Frankly, the fact few people will ever run into you there and that he, in ways, has you all to himself, suits him just fine and the fact can be silently possessive as well as incredibly daunting.

― I'm not talking country life, I'm talking house in the mountains deep in the woods type of life. The locals know someone lives up there; Barnes and his woman, but they don't assume they ever saw you to the point you might as well be make belief, which is how Barnes wants it anyway because if anyone has any problems they should come to him with it or so god help them. He becomes a bit of a local urban legend, almost; the scarred man in the night who scares people and lost hikers off of the woods and the mountainside and probably does far worse than just that if push comes to shove and genuinely, regardless of his civilian status, this is a reputation Barnes embraces even in domesticity. I think people could very much be afraid of him all while he lives a relatively reclusively and tucked away life with you. He doesn't give me the impression he'd like too many individuals once he's out of the army and has no interest in communicating with most any of them nor does he make any effort to re-socialize himself post-war; there's a frightening yet passionate singlemindedness to him. You're about the only chosen person he wants and that's that on that. Are you a hostage? No. Well, maybe. Can you get away? No. Does he want you to? Also no.

― Frankly, there's a certain impression he has about his various scars being the cause of stares and judgement now that he rotated back into the world especially when juxtaposed with you and the fact that you're a beaut. Barnes doesn't want stares. He doesn't want whispers. He doesn't want anyone as much as uttering the words in the vein of 'What's she doing with him and how does she wake up next to him in the morning, looking at that mug'. Doesn't want anyone as much as looking in his general direction or yours because he knows he might kill over it, which is the overall reason, among others, for so much reclusion, seeing as how Barnes doesn't 'delude' himself that anyone's going to be tremendously welcoming back home, leading to his territorial tendencies towards you as a spouse. He doesn't want you leaving, he doesn't want you perceived, he doesn't want you getting tremendously close to anyone else and he doesn't want you potentially developing an interest in anyone else and attempting to run away, irregardless of the fact that it is a fruitless endeavor and he'd find you, but still, he's selfish, he's jealous, he's vindictive, he'd take a personal interest in making anyone's life a living hell over you, he's a mean motherfucker and he knows it. He's got one person that's his and that's you and he'll be damned if he'll go around being generous with your presence.

― Meaning that as a husband, Barnes would be intense. Intense with a capital I. Especially once all restrains the military put on him and the close proximity of civilization's presence as a whole are gone. He's not bad, but intense. All in. So much of his character and who he is and was dedicated to war, the platoon, his men and what he thinks is right that once all of that inevitably ends there's a gaping hole in its place where you get poured into, meaning that you consume him the way the war itself did and he doesn't need anyone else but you, quite literally, and this is a deliberate and conscious choice he makes to the point he lives outside of the bounds of pretty much, well, everything and by extension, you do too because he isn't going around sharing you with anyone. It's an all-consuming existence where it's just you and him; he strikes me as the type who'd drive down to the nearest city, say, once a month, bring back whatever's needed and spend the rest of the time almost like he's awaiting for some sort of attack, ambush or siege that never arrives. It's safe to say he'd be angry at the world for what he'd see as the loss of war in Vietnam precisely, because the way he'd see it, people like him weren't allowed to fight the way a war's 'meant' to be fought and he'd want no part in society (least of all one that would judge people like him post-return) and so you're both blessed and cursed with the gift of being loved by a man who only loves you out of the whole wide world.

[rowretro]

𝕾𝖙𝖎𝖑𝖑 𝕸𝖔𝖓𝖘𝖙𝖊𝖗

✧taglist✧: @nxzz-skz   @nshmrarki @wntersm

✧CHAPTER 4✧

Babe walked out of school silently. With the boys having to stay behind for basket ball practice, she had plenty of time to make it home before they ever catch sight of her. 

Home.

The one place she can finally find peace. Now she's moved out of the toxic household of her family, without the need to visit those judgemental relatives that don't even know her, she finally found herself at somewhat peace.

Once she arrived home, she made sure to lock her garage and lock the doors of her home, sighing in relief. However, she knew there's no way she'll be at peace even in the four safe walls of her own home... the paranoia was eating her insides.

Not even a nice cold shower or warm bath with a side of red or white wine could calm her nerves, though she was still feeling icky as she had just gone to school.

After weighing the odds of one of the boys appearing in the shower with a knife in hand to stab her, she finally decided it was safe to take a shower, with some loud music playing in the background. 

7 songs had passed as she finally stepped out of the long shower, drying herself as she wore some comfortable attire. She rushed downstairs, feeling that she's be more at peace there.

With her Spotify playlist blasting in the back, and a pencil at hand, she sat at a rather messy desk, dried acrylic paint strides decorating the surface as many other art pieces surrounded the room. 

Only that corner of  the room was such a mess, and she wouldn't even try to clean it up as it will be worthless if she starts painting again. For a second, she forgot those boys even existed. 

For a second.  

She received a text from an unknown number, as she clicked on it her blood ran cold...

Unknown number: 

Aw you didn't wait for us?

Babe.

Babe answer me right now.

For every minute I have to wait on your text, will be the amount of time you will experience hell...

Babe read the texts, wondering what to text, but it's not like she had all the time in the world to come up with a response... She had totally forgotten that she had given Sunghoon her number.

Babe: 

Sorry I kinda forgot

Uhm this is Sunghoon right?

Unknown:

Sunghoon??? you gave Sunghoon your number? 

Babe: 

Well yeah he did ask for it

if this isn't Sunghoon than who is this?

Unknown:

Riki. I copied your number

Your pin number is so basic babygirl

Anyways. you took 17 minutes to respond... but you can make it up to us if you get to our home on time. 

Riki sent her the address as Babe hastily slipped on her high heels, running over to the building, not wanting the boys to take note of any of her vehicles.

Taking a deep breath, she rang the doorbell. As if he was waiting there for her, Riki answered the door almost immediately.

His bare face handsome as ever, those pretty chocolate moles now visible, his dark eyes, held a spine-chilling psychotic look, while looking rather alluring, and those perfect plush lips. So perfect... so kissable...

He was so handsome, his hair wet, the white shirt fit him perfectly, and the way he towered over her...

But that was all overlooked... that psychotic look in his eyes, that deadly smirk plastered on his lips, the way he snaked his around her waist... one'd think he was a loving boyfriend up to some mischief.

"You're early... I was kinda hoping you'd arrive a little late.... you see im feeling bored darling" Riki added pulling her inside as he shut the door.

Babe sat on the couch, silently as she observed her surroundings. So elegant... the place looked rather classy. "It's just you and me tonight... the boys are busy working" Riki randomly said as he noticed how the girl nervously picked at the hem of her skirt.

"You're lucky I don't feel like cleaning up blood today... you're off the hook." Riki said as the girl looked up at him in shock. Only then did she notice how he was seemingly hot, the sound of his sniffles and coughs were heard as he gulped a spoonful of medicine, the disgust evident on his face.

The male simply dragged her up the stairs to his room, and pushed onto his bed, triggering her instantly, but she froze when he simply rested his head upon her belly, snuggling her as his arms wrapped around her figure.

His eyes were already closed as he babbled nonsense. Confused, Babe got up a little, balancing the weight of her upper body on her elbows. The psycho looked so peaceful, his body was really warm. Hesitant, she lied back down, running a hand through his slightly wet hair.

She reached for a towel, softly trying to dry his hair, trying not to wake him up. A few minutes passed as she heard the familiar voices  of the other boys, filling the building.

Sunoo froze by the doorway as he noticed Babe trapped in Riki's embrace "Jungwon Riki caught us a deer." Sunoo called out to Won as Heeseung frowned "But I'm right here-" Hee said as he walked over to Sunoo.

"Not you idiot- her-" Jungwon pointed at Babe who blinked. "Leave her for now... Riki's sick if you yank her away from him he might just leave another scar on your back." Jungwon as Sunoo rolled his eyes 

And the deer fell right into the deadly trap, now stuck underneath the demon himself...

✧𝕾𝖙𝖎𝖑𝖑 𝕸𝖔𝖓𝖘𝖙𝖊𝖗✧

[elderflowergin]

A little rant about MBC My Dearest, purity and men who weaponise it:

(Trigger warning: sexual assault, rape as a war crime)

Fusion sageuk or not, this world has some set rules around purity, even in the relatively loosey-goosey Neuggeunri, where women and men can and do commingle, chat and meet in groups. The last barbarian invasion hangs over them; the old ladies in Gil-chae’s hometown tell the girls that death is better than allowing the barbarians to touch you and that if they do, you should kill yourself for the sake of said purity. Death is preferable to lost purity in this time/place; that’s firmly established from the beginning of the show. (It’s reinforced midway when Injo’s court reports of women who jumped off cliffs into the sea at Ganghwa rather than be taken by barbarians, no doubt perceived not as an avoidance of pain and torture, but a praiseworthy act designed to retain and restore purity).

Gil-chae and Eun-ae have to grapple with this when Eun-ae is attacked by a barbarian. Eun-ae was violated and felt violated by what happened. They know what they are supposed to do, what the old ladies told them to do; and yet Gil-chae holds Eun-ae close and says, nothing happened. We were hurt and our clothes were torn because we rolled down a mountain. Nothing happened to us. She rewrote that story, in the face of everything that said Eun-ae didn’t deserve to live anymore. Consummate survival requires rewriting stories, even the ones that are the hardest to paper over.

Because it appears again in Hanyang, in relative peacetime, when Eun-ae feels she cannot accept Yeon-jun’s proposal, because even if Gil-chae rewrote that story, it’s harder to reconfigure shame when it’s under the skin, when it’s attached to the thing that makes you valuable as a woman. Yeon-jun may never know what it took for his future wife to survive, and that ignorance too, is a privilege. But Eun-ae knows, and perceives her value differently now than before. It’s Gil-chae who persuades her again, who reminds her that they rewrote this story together, two women who survived against all odds.

In this postwar, still somewhat vulnerable time, the possibility is high that there are assault survivors around, just as there are women who may have had to sell their bodies to feed their families, or broken any number of rules around purity for survival. It’s foreseeable that women survivors have been through or seen unimaginable things happen to other women, to their friends and have experienced it themselves. I’m not saying this to undersell the general trauma of war on men - just to say that war crimes hurt women in a very different, very intensely long-lasting way* as compared to theatres of war and fighting.

All of this to say: it didn’t take Jang Hyeon very long to go from “you’re not as pure as you think you are for loving a taken man” a few episodes ago to “you couldn’t live without a man for a day? If you were going to give it away you might as well come to me at least once.” I am truly horrified that he pretty much gets away with it; Gil-chae moves with the punch and gets in a hit of her own, but that’s a bone-chilling thing to tell a woman, any woman. It would be a terrible thing to say to a woman now, let alone in a time when that mattered so much to women, let alone in a time and place where it was forcibly taken from so many women, many of whom died so it wouldn’t be.

This callous attitude continues later when she’s run away with him and they’re in a room for the night. She tentatively asks about marriage, saying that it would be hard for her, since she’s almost a married woman, and people would consider her “used”. (Her fiancé later tells Yeon-jun that he is permitted to kill his partner and the adulterous lover, so this isn’t a gossip without consequence.) In essence, Gil-chae put her life on the line for a man who still says “Husband, no. I am your servant and my body is yours”, a promise that carries little substantive meaning in their world. Marriage isn’t a luxury good that she’s asking for as a whim. It’s what protects Gil-chae and her family from harm; it’s what will allow her sister to find a suitable match later on.)

Jang Hyeon is shown from the start as a man of his own ideas, someone who who doesn’t truck with traditional Joseon morality. He can and does reinvent rules for himself, and clearly doesn’t think that much of notions of purity, but he’s fine using them against Gil-chae.

Yes, Jang Hyeon saved her life during the war, but Jang Hyeon also had the choice of participating or not, the luxury of stepping back if he so chose. Gil-chae had no such luxury, no such choice, an open target on the run. He no doubt understands that the barbarians are raping women, that to survive as a woman is fraught, that sex has become fraught. To use purity to attack a woman he claims to love, to reduce her momentarily the way those old women did - to express his anger by lashing out in this way, in a way calculated to hurt, to violently pierce at the foundation of what it means to be a woman in this time and place is a cruelty that is hard to countenance. It’s telling that his anger at her leads him there, that it escalated with all that time, because he knows that’s what hurts. He knows it’s valuable, knows it hurts when he strikes at it, and yet will do little to protect it for her. I don’t know if there’s any amount of growth that will change this, whether it’s something he can change at all.

There are many upsetting things about this episode, but Gil-chae’s choice to stay at the end is the least upsetting part of it, and the most conceivable, intelligent choice she could have made in the face of a man who - in her perspective - can only offer her fervent words and a feverish gaze, things that will not feed her family or protect her reputation, her business or her heart.

[hello-railou]

In Which Carl Takes a Nap. Kinda.

Ficlet. 2000 words. Canon compliant.

Carl finally gets a tiny moment to rest between all the trauma.

Set during book 7, in the beginning of Part 3: Open hostilities

---

”So, once we get ourselves over here, it should be relatively easy going from there”, I said to Rosetta as we leaned over the large map. Rosetta followed my finger and nodded.

“I mostly agree, but I do see a lot that can go wrong here”, she pointed out. “What are you going to do if they manage to surround you?”

“It shouldn’t be possible, not with the way we are moving, but I do have a plan for that”, I began, as I got a chat notification. It was Boomer from the 106th Bloody Leeches, asking if anyone was available nearby to assist in a minor scuffle with a horde of various mobs. I sent out my own suggestion, while Rosetta looked up at me and raised her eyebrow.

“Which is…?” she asked skeptically.

I blinked, momentarily forgetting what the topic between us had been. Mordecai had messaged me, asking if I had enough “Essence of the Undead” or some shit like that in my inventory for a potion he was trying out. I checked. I had, so I sent him a reply and told him I would be around in the saferoom in a minute.

Thinking of the saferoom, I still needed to train my skill for the day. I had been constantly running all over the place sorting things out, but I really shouldn’t skip training now that we finally had a moment to stay inside for a couple of days.

But there was just so much to do. So little time. My chat was pinging an increasing amount with messages from around our lands, reporting on enemy movements. I sent a quick message to Florin camping in the second sector with the 101st Crocodiles, asking if they had gotten their supplies refilled in time.

“So, um. The plan”, I said to Rosetta after an awkwardly long silence. She tilted her head, waiting.

I was tapping my fingers against the table in an erratic pattern. Not like I was typing in the chat, no – writing mentally was already second nature to me – but like a crazy pianist on crack. Deep down, I knew I did it to hide how much my hands were shaking.

The plan. What was the plan?

Once again, my meager train of thought was interrupted.

Donut: CARL, COME TO THE SAFEROOM THIS INSTANT. I HAVE A SURPRISE FOR YOU.

Donut’s messages were marked as the highest priority on my interface, so it popped up on top of all the other messages that had piled up, still unread. I grimaced apologetically to Rosetta, pulled up the chat and quickly replied,

Carl: Not now, Donut. Busy.

Donut: YOU’RE ALWAYS BUSY, CARL. THIS CAN’T WAIT.

Carl: What is it?

Donut: I ALREADY TOLD YOU TO COME HERE.

I grunted. It couldn’t be anything too important if Donut couldn’t even tell me the reason why I should step away from my planning session with Rosetta. She was usually good at relying on the information when it really mattered. I decided to ignore the cat for now.

“Sorry”, I muttered to Rosetta, trying to parse my thoughts together. I could barely think around the noise in my head, which was starting to form into a bitch of a headache. I rubbed my forehead forcibly with the heel of my hand. “What I was saying was…”

“Actually”, Rosetta said, and I realized her eyes had been flashing too with the occasional message. “Mordecai just sent me a message. He needs my help with a recipe. It sounded urgent. Walk with me to the saferoom?”

I nodded, turning to follow her. “Sure.” I pondered her words for a minute, wondering if I should be worried about Mordecai’s experiments. “Is he okay? Did his potions explode or something?”

Rosetta snorted. “Or something.”

“We can continue after you’re done”, I said, pushing open the saferoom door and letting her in before me. “I think I’ll go train in the meanwhile. Hit me up once you’re free.”

Rosetta gave me a nod and a smile, but there was an odd weight to it. Sadness. Or… Maybe pity? Whatever it was, I was too high-strung to start unraveling what all that could mean right now.

We separated, and I headed for the training room, checking my unread messages as I walked.

Florin: Yeah, all good over here, buddy. Thanks for checking in.

Carl: Good. Let me know if that changes.

“Carl”, someone said close to me. I yanked on the training room door, but it didn’t open. Someone was standing right by it, holding it closed with intention. Then, their hands were suddenly on me, and I whirled around with a growl, ready to push them away from me.

“Carl, calm down!”

It only registered to me then that I was in a saferoom and no matter who it was standing in my way, it would be a friend.

Holy shit. I had almost punted them in the face. In the saferoom.

I took a hurried step back. Imani was standing there looking up at me, her arms raised in front of her, eyes wide.

“Shit, I’m sorry, I-“ I began, suddenly feeling like the biggest asshole.

“No, it’s alright”, Imani interrupted me. She placed her small hand against my arm again, this time slowly, and gently. “I didn’t mean to startle you. You weren’t answering my calls.”

“Or mine”, Donut said haughtily, jumping on my shoulder.

Had they been in the saferoom this whole time? I couldn’t remember seeing them at all when I came in.

“Wh- what’s up?” I asked, but I could already tell.

This was an intervention.

Donut’s claws dug into my shoulder as Imani grasped my arms with both of her hands. Her butterfly wings encapsulated me, just for a second or two before pulling back, but I could already feel the effects.

My head filled with cotton. The river eased, now barely a whisper in the back of my mind.

“Take a deep breath, Carl”, Imani said quietly.

I looked around. The saferoom was empty beside us three. No one would notice if I rested for just a moment.

Would they?

Imani started to push me towards the couch. I went without resistance.

I had the buffs “Relaxed” and “Quiet mind” active. They gave me +5% healing speed each.

“But my health is full”, I mumbled, as Imani pressed hard on my shoulders until I sat down onto the couch. Imani’s thumb soothed against my arm.

“I know that, Carl.”

I leaned back against the cushions, and Donut settled onto my neck. Still, I struggled to keep my eyes open. I didn’t want to sleep, not without an enchanted bed that promised dreamless sleep. A nap on the normal couch scared me. Of what I might see down there.

I had lost the ability to form a coherent sentence, so I opened my chat and sent Imani a private message. I hoped she’d understand.

Carl: Nightmares?

Imani sat down next to me and shook her head slightly.

Imani: Don’t worry. This won’t put you to sleep. Think of it as deep relaxation. A meditative state.

Carl: Okay.

Still, I kept my eyes open for a moment longer. I realized all my chats had minimized and there were no alerts for new messages. I could see the icon, though, blinking in the corner of my vision. It had a tiny “99+” next to the picture of an inbox.

Carl: How long?

Imani: 15 minutes.

I thought about that. A lot could happen in 15 minutes. I, for example, had blown myself up into liquid flesh and atoms, gotten pummeled into mush and reformed, all in just under 90 seconds.

A lot could happen in 15 minutes.

Did I really have time for this?

Donut: JUST CLOSE YOUR HECKING EYES CARL AND RELAX FOR ONCE IN YOUR LIFE. HOW MANY TIMES DO I NEED TO SAY IT.

Carl: That was the first time you said that to me.

Donut: TAKE A HINT.

I smiled. I raised a heavy hand and placed it on Donuts soft, silky back. She started to purr loudly.

My eyes closed before I could stop it.

My thoughts drifted to another time when I had lied just like this, on a couch with Donut’s heavy weight on my chest. I used to do that a lot, coming home from work when Bea wasn’t yet home. I’d turn off the TV that had been on for Donut to watch during the day, lay down onto the couch and just nap with the cat. She’d always seemed so pleased when I came home. I’d really liked that.

What an odd feeling it had been, to be longed for.

I would always nap for as long as I could, eventually getting woken up by either Donut getting hungry – as in, increasingly loud and prickly – or Bea coming home and demanding why I was, once again, lazing around like a useless slug.

I had not cherished those quiet, peaceful moments enough when I’d had them, I thought. Now, relaxing on the couch in the saferoom of the dungeon, I felt almost that same peacefulness, but it wasn’t quite the same. The nagging feeling was still there, telling me to move move move. The river was still there. They were quiet – they were easy to ignore for the moment – but I knew I had already been permanently changed compared to the Carl before the collapse.

He’d been so innocent. So lucky to have that peace.

I’d never have it again. Not like that.

Donut shifted, her poofy tail tickling my nose as she rolled onto her side. Imani’s hand was still pressed against my arm, and I felt another wave of warmth spread through me.

I stared into the darkness behind my eyelids.

I was lucky too, I decided. I was lucky to be alive. I was lucky to have my friends, my family, still here with me.

You will not break me.

The darkness was quiet and peaceful. I drifted.

.

Eventually, I got pulled back to reality by the sounds returning to my chat notifications.

There was an active chatroom going, and I cracked my eyes open and pulled up the messages.

Li Jun: Has anyone heard about Carl? He’s not answering any of our messages.

Katia: Or mine.

Elle: Uh-oh.

Imani: He’s in the saferoom with me. He’s relaxing.

Elle: UH-OH.

Katia: What happened? Is he okay?

Imani: He’s fine. He needed rest. I induced him with 15 minutes of relaxation buffs.

Rosetta: Per my request.

Elle: Oh, that sounds nice. I was so sure he’d been grievously injured.

Li Jun: Me too.

Donut: CARL NEVER RESTS AFTER HE’S BEEN GRIEVOUSLY INJURED. YOU SHOULD KNOW THAT ALREADY.

Florin: That is sad but true.

Donut: WE JUST HAD THE BEST NAP OF OUR LIVES.

Katia: I’m glad, Donut.

Elle: I’m jealous.

I sat up. My hands were no longer shaking, and my head was clear. My heartbeat was a steady thump, thump, thump in my chest. I hadn’t even realized how elevated it had been for the past… well. For the past however long it had been since I’d last sat down.

Donut was lounging on the back of the couch, eyes flashing as she chatted away. I imagined she was answering multiple questions about my health and status. Imani was no longer in the room. I sent her a message.

Carl: Thank you.

Imani: Anytime, Carl.

I switched to the other chat room.

Carl: I’m back. Give me a second to sort through my messages.

Elle: Welcome back, big boy.

Li Jun: There’s nothing that requires urgent action in my messages. Get back to them when you can.

Carl: Okay.

Katia: Same. No hurry to reply to mine, either.

Carl: Good to know.

Carl: Rosetta, you’ve got time?

I stood up, and Donut leaped to my shoulder. She pressed her head against mine. The river was in there, louder now, but I had it contained. Like with Shi Maria, I had the upper hand for now.

I patted Donut on the head and straightened my back.

Rosetta: I do, comrade. I heard you’ve got a plan to go through with me.

[randomnameless]

Devnotes + rants for Drakengard characters (ft Virginia) !

Under the cut, Virginia, Leah, Berengaria, Aramis, Primm and Gilbert!

I feel like I already rant a lot about Virginia lol, as for her devnotes, it's more about her outfit and design, based on the prototype of the "unicorn knight" seen in the beta, and I find it a nice coincidence that since Alain also borrows from this prototype, there's a unity in the Cornian royal fam's designs!

The only thing that really bothers me with her design is the, uh, Lyn-tier slit of her skirt like come on, why not giving her shorts like Leah has? - but comparing her base sprite to her promoted one, I noticed she got a lot more accessories like earrings, a tiara and the golden accessories on her outfit (the belt and armbands?) which sort of make sense from narrative standpoint, pre-promoted Virginia is basically on the run for the last 6 years after her second home was overtaken so I guess she didn't brought jewels/accessories with her (assuming she had any, since she ran to Drakengard as a kid, without her retinue and I suppose, most of her royal belongings!) but in the Liberation Army, while she's also fighting, Cornia has already been mostly liberated, so I guess it is easier to find bling/accessories.

Unit wise she's a physical tank who can deal reasonable damage and retaliate with true strikes (aka strikes dodge tanks can't avoid) so yeah, she's a really good unit!

She also comes with self-heal shield that also increases her durability!

Leah!

Virginia's Gilbert's vassal and the second named swordfighter you recruit! Devnotes reveal that her concept was designed because one of them wanted a "small" swordsman with blue hair so... Here she goes!

TBH I expected some sort of revelation about her parentage, since she was apparently abandonned in the castle as a baby, and in an odd move, the Drakengard King rescued her and raised her - we're told he liked to pat her "blue" hair and Berengaria remarks on her "blue" hair too, since only the Cornian royals have blue hair, are we supposed to believe she's from a bastard line, or King Hugo's weird "fatherly" tendencies to what is basically a random orphan meant that she is one of his bastards? We will never know.

For someone who's basically Virginia's retainer, I really liked her role in Virginia's chapter (which is the intervention that make her start to reconsider quitting the army, when she was still deadset on leaving after the Knights of the Rose's passionate pleas!) and what she does in her own chapter/map, trying to mend the relationships between Drakengardians (even if they are green units who acted like green units!) and the Cornian Liberation army. I could talk more about Leah, but I'm sure a point could be made about her being a relatively major character in the Drakengard arc, given how she has ties - and rapport convos! - to every plot important character!

Ah, Berengaria.

TBH, given how mine refuse to use her fucking shield even if I raised her guard stat, she died way too easily and I really couldn't find what Reddit found so amazing - unit wise - about her since, well, she couldn't tank for shit.

Design wise... Yeah, the Zenoiran armors are ass (who wants a metal thong?) and only here for fanservice - save for Narcesse's who was borrowed by Alcina.

Berengaria was designed as a "strong woman with heavy make up" who also loves pretty white dresses - but bar the "ice queen who uwus 4 u" trope, I sort of bought it more easily than if this was pulled out for a mercenary character of no standing, because Berengaria was basically high Drakengard nobility before the fall of the country - and her father's death. Maybe during her tenure as a Count's daughter she used to wear nice dresses and make-up?

Her character arc is higly reminiscent of something straight out of Kishi's book (older sibling wants to avenge her dead parents and tells to younger sibling that he's too weak to do anything to push him away while she'll do the dangerous stuff, younger sibling doesn't listen and fights his own battles, she takes a bullet for younger sibling and ends up brainwashed but returns thanks to younger sibling's efforts, and they make up and swear to remain by each other's side), if Berengaria wasn't a woman.

Bonus point for her being the only maiden (as far as I've checked) who, after being picked by the Lord/Player as their waifu, ditches them to spend time with her younger brother instead. I included a pic of Berengaria when she was a merc (along with her bro Travis and Bruno!), i still find it a missed opportunity that she can't reclass in the merc line lol

Primm was designed for the "always hungry but cute short woman" trope, but she stands out thanks to her relationship with her sister and her role to recruit her - remember the plague subplot? Despite looking and acting like a klutz, Primm investigated and discovered that this plague isn't natural, but something gharnef Zenoira made, she hopes to convince her sister with those facts and logic, but it doesn't work so we still have to fight her.

She's also an easter egg to the Lena archetype, given how she's rescued by a "mysterious" swordsman - who dumps her in the middle of a battlefield, and I liked how she pointed that out lol

Finally some French representation!

Aramis - whose name and clothes were inspired by a famous french novel - was designed to have long hair, so the devs tried to cook around it lol and lo, it is revealed that his long hair was actually part (or not?) of a disguise to hide his identity! Just like his antics and "theatrical" tone of speech now define him, compared to being "stiff" and "formal" in his former life.

Aramis doesn't have a chapter to himself per say... but his "chapter" is actually, if you recruited him and don't play Alain as a moron who ignores his allies' advices, the last chapter of the arc, where he reunites with Gilbert and puts his past to rest, knowing well that his younger brother will rule in his stead as the King he would never have been.

I really liked his rapport convos with Gilbert - if he wants to stop being Ludwig to become Aramis, does it mean he will stop being Gilbert's older brother? - and yet no matter how complicated and convoluted their relationship is, Aramis will still try to help him whenever he can! Special mention to the NPCs in Drakengard who tell you, after liberating their areas, that they were helped by a swordsman with long hair, someone even mistaking him for a woman - he might have abandonned his title and his throne, he doesn't abandon the people, his brother or even the random Drakengardians. Aramis is cool.

he was inspired by french characters, of course he'd be cool

did i also mention how he is voiced by ryotaro okiayu??

Ending with Gilbert, the King of Drakengard who was never supposed to sit on the throne by virtue of being a second son, but still does it with the cheers and love of his people!

Some people called it before, but yeah, Gilbert's arc and design really feels like he had been designed, at one point, as the protagonist, but the idea was scrapped (in the few beta panels, we can see drawings where he was the prince and was helped/scolded by the unicorn knight!). I can say much about his trousers, but what kills me is the sorry excuse of armor he wears, dude took his regular/usual clothes (he's wearing them in the cover of the artbook!), slapped a breast plate on them and called it a day.

Visually, I like how his moveset/animations are inspired by fencing, even if he doesn't usually sees much fighting, since his role is to support his allies by being, what we would call in FE14, a rally bot.

I could write an entire post about Gilbert lol, but I really liked how the game tackled, through his plot convo with Leah and his supports with Alain (and to some extent, Virginia) how he's still the King of a nation that used to be at war with Cornia for ages for ressources, and how his prejudice and inferiority complex regarding the Cornians is something that exists, but he wants to grow beyond that - because they have a common enemy, but also because he wants to build a better relationship with his neighbours - which makes his relationships with Cornia/the Cornians complicated.

I liked that angle, usually the trope is "common enemy means everyone becomes friends and forget the bad blood existing before the common enemy appeared", but this time it was developped in another way. Too bad Gilbert has no support with the rulers/heads of the other nations but on his own, in the Drakengard arc, he's a really nice twist on the archetype he's based on.

[red-tiger-elite-baichang]

Discussing the other prominent specialist soldiers on New Kunlun because I’m bored..

Red Tiger Elite Yanren:

- They’re pretty chill

- Rather softspoken, prefers time alone

- Trains hard

- Good attendance at Jie meetings

Red Tiger Elite Kuiyan:

- Weird

- Horrible attendance

- Seems high? Always covered in red dust and wobbling around

- He sits in a cave.. no clue why

Red Tiger Elite Lieguan:

- MY HERO

- Hates apemen even more than me, organized a whole assault party and launched a raid on a harvesting platform due to an offhand comment from Jiequan about apemen

- Takes charge, loud, strong

- I wanna be just like him someday..

Celestial Sentinel Jiaoduan

- She’s fucking annoying

- Has tried to date every other specialist soldier, very toxic

- Supposed to help “run” part of Kuafu’s area, turns off the bridge and spends all her time posting selfies and blocking off the way to get to her.

- Has two guards who suck up to her, the rest just kinda chill.

Celestial Sentinel Wuqiang

- You are NOT JIEQUAN STOP.

- Constantly repeats Jiequan’s statements word for word outside of meetings, stares at him very intently during meetings.

- Will actually kill people for not liking Jiequan, I’ve seen it happen.

- Owns Jiequan merch.. we ARE Jie clan merch have you seen our designs? Taodamn..

Celestial Spectre Shuigui:

- He scares me man..

Celestial Spectre Shangui:

- Slight superiority complex, justified by being very wise

- Deep thinker, doesn’t say much, but whatever he says is genius

- Absolutely NO sense of humor, I have never once seen him even smile.. -oh..

Celestial Enforcer Tieyan:

- She’s very wholesome

- Just transitioned recently, Yanlao is generally accepting, just confused.

- Accentuates her speech with little giggles

- I want to squish her constantly she’s so adorable

Celestial Enforcer Huanxian:

- Her and Jiaoduan are friends.. I dislike the both of them.

- Haven’t seen her in a long time.. hmm..

- She wasn’t subtle at all, stared at the one dreamscape lady a lot when more of us were around. I get that Lady Ethereal was her boss but like…

Celestial Warden Yinyue:

- This guy is both really cool and very scary

- Has won every fighting tournament I’ve seen him in with relative ease. I don’t know why they designed him so well while most of us pale in comparison.

- Can and will challenge Jiequan to a duel over any disagreement. It always ends in a tie after around half an hour when Yinyue is missing all of his limbs, and Jiequan is exhausted.

- His ego is really only big around Jiequan, he’s pretty calm otherwise.

- He is INCREDIBLE at cards, does magic tricks and stuff too.. I think Lieguan tries to mirror him sometimes..

Spirit Keeper Cixing:

- This bitch is CRAZY

- I don’t know why she’s still being used, she vibrates constantly and speaks in random riddles. Nobody even talks to her anymore because she doesn’t respond.

- I feel bad for her, she kicks ass but seems to have no clue what’s going on, or who she even is..

- Goes dead silent whenever that diviner is present, she watches him with some sort of silent pleading, it’s the only time she stops being erratic

Great Miner Tianshou:

- She’s uhm.. very nice..

- I f-find it hard to speak to her, she has an o-odd accent

- She struggles to get a-around a bit, her mobility s-seems off overall..

- She seems incoherent a lot, misses a m-moderate amount of meetings. I try to get out and see her a lot.

- Doesn’t seem to remember much of anything.. it’s s-sad

[modernroyalswrites]

Conflict of Interest

Summary: It is a truth universally acknowledged, that your former law school rival, must be opposing counsel on the biggest case of your career. Or, overworked & underpaid nonprofit lawyer Hermione Granger v. trust fund nepo baby Draco Malfoy. Antics ensue. Dramione, legal drama.

Chapter 3 : jus sanguinis (right of blood)

Draco Malfoy woke, as he did every morning, at 5 A.M.

He threw on a robe and padded downstairs. Stopping in the kitchen, he prepared an espresso before making his way over to the terrace, where he sat, breathed in the fresh air (objectively untrue, but he was at least up high enough to avoid most of the smell), checked his email (nothing important since he last checked late last night), and monitored other miscellaneous notifications and text messages to ensure the world hadn’t fallen apart since he had gone to sleep (it hadn’t).

His ten minutes of (relative) peace and relaxation complete for the day, he left his cup on the table and made his way back inside. Fig, his housekeeper, would take care of it when she arrived later that morning. Walking back up the stairs and into his closet, he shed his robe and donned his typical black t-shirt and shorts. Barefoot, he made his way into the bathroom. He brushed his teeth and splashed water on his face. Adjusting (admiring) his hair in the mirror, he noticed Astoria had left beauty products of some sort on the opposite vanity.

He smirked. Subtle.

Slipping on his sneakers, he made his way back down the stairs and into his elevator, riding the 65 or so floors down to the Equinox in his building, where he met his trainer, who he paid an exorbitant amount of money to kick his ass every morning.

Workout complete and legs quivering, he made his way back to the elevator, tapping his key fob for access to his condo. A quick shower (and a wank) later, and he was back in his closet, dressing for the day.

Dressed and ready to depart, he padded back into his bedroom. Astoria still slept amongst his sheets. He ran a hand down her hair, offering her a glass of water when her eyes opened. As she sat up, the sheets spilled down her torso, revealing the silk chemise she had put on last night after he’d fucked her in the shower. The silk accentuated the points of her nipples, and he tore his eyes away. 

“I have to go. I have breakfast with my mother. My housekeeper will be here in about an hour, at eight o’clock. Would you like me to call you a car?”

Disappointment flashed across her face, which quickly transformed into a pretty smile. He knew she hoped for an invitation to his breakfasts with his mother, but that wouldn’t be happening any time soon (or ever, if he was being entirely honest). It would signal a level of commitment he had no interest in. He had made that explicitly clear early into their time spent together, but he suspected that she harbored a hope that, by patiently endearing herself to him, he would eventually change his mind. A relationship was not in the realm of possibility for him right now, and none of his words nor actions indicated anything contrary. 

“That’s alright, I’m meeting Daphne for a Tracy Anderson class. I’ll have her pick me up on her way.”

He nodded, quickly kissing her brow. He headed back down the elevator and out of the lobby. 

His driver Kreacher (an odd name—but who was he to judge? His name was Draco) was outside, engine running and ready to whisk Draco uptown.

“Straight to the Manor, sir?”

Read the rest of the chapter here: