#the music that plays in this scene is rly lovely too.....

[elfcollector]

GOD EATER: RESURRECTION (2015) — developed by bandai namco.

[dykeofmisfortune]

being a pretentious fuck is embarassing sometimes. bc if someone asks me what video games i play im like "yeah i only play story based indie games about depression and guilt" like omfg shut UP

[good-griief]

losing game pt. 1

HEYYYY i'm actually back with a lil smutty angsty ellie fic bc i needed to write for this woman... anyway here's part one its only a lil angsty i just wanted an excuse to write rly gay smut so enjoy and p2 tmrw!!

as most of yall know any reader i write (as a poc writer) has no race, i just wanted to use a picture of taylor momsen bc i love tpr and that's definitely the vibe of the music in this fic

part two part three

read me click me

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Being in the rock scene was your dream. You started with small gigs, then small venues and festivals, and now you had a band to go along with your music. Your career was kicking off and it felt like heaven; every performance, every song, all the adrenaline made for some of the best nights of your life. 

When you picked your band, you hand-selected each member, and to say you picked your guitarist for any reason other than how pretty she was would be a lie. Yes, she was amazing, but you also couldn’t speak when she walked in for her interview. She just smiled, laughing at the way you stared at her before your manager started talking for you. He often did, she came to realize. 

She still accepted the moment you offered her the position, but she made it clear that she didn’t like your manager. She accepted for you; to be with you.

And she slowly became your favorite part of performing. You had this way of connecting with each other — of course, you were close with all of your band members, but she was different. You’d spend time together one-on-one, smoking a joint and talking about nothing until one of you had to force yourself to go. You’d get coffee together, have dinners, and even spend the night at each other’s apartments. Whenever someone asked about you two, you said you were best friends. Even when she was waiting for you at the end of the carpet, and you both laughed at your answer like it was some kind of inside joke. 

Even when you were onstage, on your knees, singing your most sensual song to her as she melted to your level, smirking as her hips thrust against the electric guitar. Sometimes, she even sang with you. You’d hold her face, or thread your fingers through her hair as you held eye contact or rested your forehead against hers with shut eyes, and if there was a break in the song you’d kiss her hard — a stage kiss that the crowd would erupt in cheers over. But they happened offstage, too… after a shared joint or during a party. Nothing more.

She’d let you place your fingers on the strings of her guitar to find the chords as you stood behind her, her head leaning back on your shoulder in a way that showed the muscles on her neck as she breathed in heavy, hot breaths. She let you wrap your hand around her throat, groaning in your ear as fans caught pictures of you dragging your tongue over her sweat-ridden jaw or biting her shoulder as she grinned. 

There was one night you let her take over the mic as you danced along. She played her guitar, singing and watching you until you sang with her. Your hands drifted down her thighs as you kneeled behind her, the crowd screaming as you lifted her shirt and came around to kiss the line of hair below her belly button. She smirked, stopping her playing and fisting your hair to pull your head back as you laughed. 

Nights when you’d take off your shirt, tossing it into the audience and pouring your water on yourself before she came to lick it up, tongue dragging over top of your breasts as you sang breathlessly. There were times she had to wrap her arm around your back to keep you standing when she did that, the action so intimate, so arousing, that it was hard to remember why you were on stage and not in your dressing room, alone with her. Some nights she’d take her shirt off and give it to you if she didn’t want anyone else to see you, smiling at you with her shirt on before you came over to kiss her cheek. 

There were moments with other band members, but none of them were like her. They didn’t make you feel the same — none of them were her. 

So, when the end of her contract came up and she talked to you about leaving to pursue other things, you were devastated. You didn’t think she’d leave, but after a talk with your manager, her decision was set. 

“I think you should,” you told her anyway. “Whatever makes you happy, Els, seriously. I’ll support whatever you do.” She smiled, taking your hand to kiss. On the inside of her fingers, and yours, you could see the matching tattoos you got months ago, threading your fingers together so they match up. 

You dedicated your last show with her to her. It was a surprise, and she cried when you said it in the beginning, but she just turned away to shake it off quickly. At least, she did until you started crying during a song you wrote for her — it was another surprise from you and the rest of the band, but the minute she saw you crying she couldn’t keep it together. She came over to hug you, kissing the top of your head as she let you hide your face in her chest. The crowd awed, but Ellie took the mic to say you’d be back. She set it down and lifted your head to make you look at her. “I love you, pretty girl,” she said, away from the microphone so no one heard her, but they could sound it out if they wanted to. “Please don’t cry.” She wiped beneath your eyes, ignoring the camera flashes and screams from the crowd. “I hate that I can’t do anything about it right now.”

You smiled. “I’m gonna miss you so much.” 

She laughed at you. “It’s not like I’m going anywhere.” She nodded to the microphone. “Finish my song, I wanna hear the rest.”

“You’re an idiot,” you said, now standing at the mic and making the audience laugh. 

You were such an idiot. 

She never told you what other things she wanted to pursue, but you should’ve known. 

Of-fucking-course she was pursuing her own music. Of-fucking-course she was starting her own band. With yours. Of-fucking-course all of their contracts ending over the course of a few months would amount to this. Of-fucking-course each last show you dedicated to them meant nothing. 

You couldn’t even be mad. It was smart. But you were beyond hurt. 

And she still dedicated her first show to you. She texted you herself, asking you to come. 

When would you learn your lesson?

“I just want to thank you guys for coming,” she said to an audience of mostly your fans. “You might know me — us — from a backup band, but we got a little tired of being backup, didn’t we?” The band laughed. “So, uh, my name’s Ellie if you don’t know… probably don’t,” she laughed as if you’d never thanked or introduced your band before. “And I just want to dedicate this show to the previous artist I worked with. I wouldn’t be here without her, so she means… a lot,” she said it so fucking snarky, “to me, and… I have a few songs for her… if you all wanna guess which ones they are.”

And her first song was the biggest Fuck You song you’d ever heard. 

Still, she texted you after the show. 

She didn’t ask you to come to another show, and maybe that was because you announced a break from music, or because she was getting so much attention that she didn’t care. You saw her at award shows sometimes, and she would cheer when you won. Of course, you’d cheer for her too, but it never went beyond that. Almost like it was an unspoken rule that you weren’t on speaking terms. 

But the minute you came back to the scene, almost a year later, she texted you for the first time since her first show. 

You didn’t reply at first. You hadn’t kept up with her at all during your break, your manager telling you to stay away from any of her and her band's promotions and interviews. He had you block all of them and their numbers, but you couldn’t bring yourself to block Ellie’s. And you were glad you didn’t. Usually, you didn’t have your phone on you until late at night, your manager having your assistant handle your messages and social media, but you were about to fall asleep when she texted. As if she remembered your schedule. 

And it prompted you to look her up. Then her and you, and you could see countless videos. 

every time ellie has mentioned “her” compilation was what you decided to click on. It was made by an account that was clearly a big fan of hers, so you readied yourself for any hate that’d be thrown your way. 

The first clip was an interview, asking her why she split from your team. “You know, I really loved her and her team,” she said, “still really love her. It’s just hard being reminded, constantly, that you're a stepping stone and your time is running low, you know? We might’ve held her back if we stayed, and she was moving on to better things,” it sounded like she was quoting someone else. “—I mean, she always wanted us to shine, and I’m so grateful for her. I really miss being on stage with her, but I don’t miss anything else besides her and I think that says a lot.” 

Another was on her way into a hotel, a reporter asking if you congratulated her on an award. You could remember seeing her at the show before your manager called you over just as she was walking your way. She laughed, “haven’t talked to her in months.” 

Another of a sit-down interview with the whole band, your name being brought up and Ellie snapping at them, “You know I really wish people would stop asking me about her.” She got choked up as the others answered, nose reddening when the question finally circled back to her. “We’re not friends, we don’t talk, she doesn’t want anything to do with us, so...” She shrugged, pissed off. 

The next was another interview. It seemed she was just having to get used to being asked about you. “I’ve tried to reach out,” she said, “maybe she changed her number.” 

Another. “She was my best friend, I miss her a lot. I hope she’s doing okay.” 

And another, asking about her songs. “Yeah, I wrote a lot about her — No, I don’t regret it. I feel like it reflects a moment in time, you know? It was a really nice moment — I mean, I still have our matching tattoos,” she laughed, showing the tattoos on the insides of her fingers. 

Another, after a show. She was always emotional after shows, and it made it harder to watch as she wiped her eyes when the interviewer asked what your relationship really was. “I don’t fucking know,” was her answer before she walked away. 

Some of them were sweet, memories you shared that made you laugh. Others made you sick with guilt, like when she mentioned your lack of response or you blocking the band. Some just made you sad. And you felt like an idiot for doing this, but after reading the comments, some defending you for not running your socials or phone, or angry with you for the same reason, you played a compilation of the two of you together from the same account. 

Then you called Ellie. 

It rang once before sending you to voicemail and you just hung up. You kept your attention on the video to distract yourself from how much that stung. 

But she called right back. 

You stared at the phone for a moment, seeing the contact poster of the two of you at her last show with you lighting up your screen and feeling your words get caught in your throat as your eyes stung. You grabbed the phone, answering quickly. “Ellie?” It was silent, “Ellie, I just wanted to say, I had no idea… I understand if you never want to talk to me again, but I—“ You cleared your throat, trying not to sound like you were about to cry. “I’m really sorry.”

“I thought — I didn’t think you were going to — It feels so good to hear your voice,” was what she settled on after stammering through a few sentences. “You have no idea how much I’ve, just, wanted to talk to you…”

You bit down on your lip as you listened to her. She didn’t sound angry, but she clearly had so much to say to you. Her voice was filled with feeling as she went on, trying to get everything out as if she thought you’d hang up the phone at any minute. You just listened, shutting your eyes and bringing your hand over your face as hot tears spilled down your cheeks. You couldn’t bring yourself to understand why you were so emotional, maybe it was the fact that you misunderstood her so easily, or that your manager had ruined your relationship with her, or maybe it was even that you were just getting to hear her talk after so long, but she paused the moment she heard you trying to calm your breathing. 

“Please don’t cry.” She already knew. “I hate it when you cry and I can’t do anything about it.”

“I’m sorry,” you mumbled. “Keep talking. What were you saying?” You looked at your computer, auto-playing something else of the two of you. It was clips of you on stage and during interviews, heads on each other's shoulders, hugging, kissing each other’s cheeks, singing together. You pursed your lips, tears coming quicker as you slammed your laptop closed. “Ellie,” you cut her off, biting at your lip as you looked at the empty spot on your bed she used to take some nights, “what are you doing right now?” 

“I’m on my way,” she said quietly, and you could hear her shuffling on the other line. She was probably getting ready to go to sleep, and wake up to no response just like every other time she messaged you. And you would have woken up with no idea she even texted you. “Do you want me to stay on the phone?”

“If you’re already headed to sleep—“

“I’m coming over,” she said. “I’m already in the car, I’ll be there in ten, okay?”

“Okay…” Now you felt bad for making her leave her house, looking outside at the snowfall and sniffling as you tried to wipe your eyes. “I’ll see you soon.” You hung up the phone and groaned at yourself, shoving your head in your pillow. 

You opened your laptop, typing in the song names people speculated she wrote for you and queuing them all. Not one was the one you heard during her first show, and it made you feel even worse by the time the doorbell rang. You moved off of your bed, wiping your eyes and going to the door to buzz her up to your apartment. 

You waited by the door, balls of your feet kicking at the floor as you crossed your arms and waited for her to knock. It was the same rhythm she used to knock in, and where it usually made you smile, it made you cry more. God, you missed her, and you didn’t even realize how much until now. You took too long to open the door and you heard the lock click. She still had her set of keys, and that made you feel worse, too. She’d probably texted you about returning them, and you never got to see it. Nothing was making you feel better as she opened the door, and seeing her face just made it worse. 

“God,” she muttered, immediately bringing her arms around your waist. She tucked her head into your shoulder, shutting her eyes as your arms went around her shoulders. Her hands held you like you’d disappear the minute she let go, thumbs running soothingly back and forth over your shirt. “I missed you so much,” she said. “They all wanted me to get over it, but I knew there was no way — I knew we had something more than just — fuck, I know you better than they do. I know I do.” Her lips brushed your skin with every word. “I missed you so fucking much,” she repeated, hugging you tighter. 

Just her touch made your tears slow to a stop, relaxing into her hold and hugging her so tight, but she didn’t care. She was happy to be back in your arms. Your hand drifted to her hair, cradling her head to your shoulder. You could remember the nights you spent playing with her hair until you fell asleep and the thought made you run your fingers through it. She sighed, pulling her head back but refusing to let you go. 

There was a silence as you moved her hair out of her face, tucking the strands behind her ear. Slowly, your hand cupped her cold, flushed cheek. She leaned into your touch, eyes falling to your lips as your thumb stroked her cheek. 

“Ellie,” you muttered and she hummed, turning her head to kiss the inside of your palm. “I missed you, too,” was all you chose to say despite the wanting in the way you said her name. Her hand took yours as she kissed the inside of your wrist. “So much…” Her kisses trailed up your arm, with more of a meaning behind them than any of the kisses you’d given each other before. 

You moved your hand back to her face, turning her head toward you. She met your eyes, hers shining in the low light. They fell to your lips again and she leaned in, kissing your cheek. She kissed away every tear stain, still wet and warm. She moved closer and closer to your mouth, but never kissed you, kissing away the stains on your other cheek instead. 

Then you turned your head, catching her lips for a brief moment before she pulled back. There was a moment of hesitation, neither of you able to speak before she pressed her lips to yours. They were still cold from being out in the snow, but they warmed as you kissed her back, pressing your body impossibly closer to hers as she sighed into your mouth. She couldn’t tell you how long she had wanted this, but she knew it was long enough that her waiting for you was pathetic.

[bamgyuuuri]

⤷ hold me, console me ┈ hk.

sypnosis. after watching a particularly terrifying horror movie, you found yourself unable to keep still, your mind still plagued with images and scenes you saw from the film. as your eyes wandered around the room frantically, they soon fell on your roommate’s door.

pairings and tags. roommate!hueningkai x reader (f/m) . fluff . emotional hurt/comfort . cuddling . friends to lovers kinda . mentions of kai’s actual owned plushies !! overall just rly rly soft kai

word count. 3.8k

short note … hmm, the title seems a little familiar, doesn’t it? anyw!! this may or may not be based on a recent experience ^_^ genuinely might be my fav fic ever written tbh ,, ilysm my angel huening kamal kai

you loved horror movies with a passion that bordered on obsession. it didn’t matter how many of these movies you had seen; the thrill and adrenaline they gave you was unparalleled.

the artistry of it all drew you in—the haunting cinematography, the deliberate pacing, the chilling music that seemed to seep into your bones. sure, there were moments when you found yourself peeking through your fingers or clutching a pillow, but that only made the experience better.

you embraced those feelings because they were part of the magic. horror movies felt like a safe way to flirt with danger, to step into the unknown without actually leaving the security of your couch.

“another horror, i presume?”

a soft voice pulls you out of your reverie. you glanced up to see kai, your roommate, standing in the hallway, a soft smile playing on his lips. his hair was slightly tousled, as though he had just woken up from a nap, and he was clutching a plush penguin in one hand.

kai was the antithesis of horror—bright, warm, and endlessly kind. he moved through life with an effortless charm, his laughter a melody that seemed to lighten every room he entered.

he wasn’t overly loud or boisterous, but he had this quiet energy that drew people in. he loved collecting plushies, each one with its own story and personality, and he treated them like tiny treasures. you often found yourself smiling at the sight of him rearranging them on his bed, humming softly to himself.

but despite his sweet demeanor, kai was far from a pushover. there was a quiet strength to him that you deeply admired. he didn’t flinch at scary movies or spooky stories, and he was the first to step up if something needed fixing or if one of you heard a strange sound at night. he made you feel safe, in a way that went beyond locked doors and sturdy walls.

you absolutely adored him in ways you couldn’t quite put into words. it wasn’t just the way he was always quick with a kind word or how he’d casually offer you the last slice of pizza without a second thought, it was the way he existed—soft but strong, gentle but brave. it was hard not to be drawn to someone like him.

“you know me too well,” you finally replied with a grin.

kai chuckles softly before disappearing back into his room, leaving the faint scent of vanilla lingering in the air.

with a contented sigh, you clutched your knees to your chest as you turned back to your laptop and pressed play. as the opening credits rolled, you felt a familiar rush of excitement ripple through you, your heart beating just a little faster in anticipation.

the atmosphere of the film immediately drew you in—the dark, foreboding forest shrouded in mist, the mournful notes of a piano score echoing in the background, and the slow, deliberate introduction of characters who seemed destined for doom.

you leaned forward slightly, your fingers gripping the edge of the blanket draped over your figure. this was your comfort zone, your escape. the thrill of stepping into a world of danger while knowing you were safe was intoxicating.

the suspense was masterfully crafted. you admired the subtle flickers of movement in the background, the artful way the camera lingered just a second too long on empty doorways, making you question if they were really empty at all. the protagonist wandered deeper into the story’s mystery, and so did you, captivated by every deliberate frame.

but as the film unfolded, your excitement began to shift.

the unease started as a mere whisper in the back of your mind, something you could easily ignore in favor of marveling at the film’s artistry. the score grew darker, more discordant, and you noticed how the shadows in the film seemed to stretch unnaturally, swallowing the light in ways that made your skin prickle.

the first scare wasn’t particularly loud or dramatic, but it was enough to make your stomach flip. a shadow moved where it shouldn’t have, and for a split second, your body tensed involuntarily.

you let out a shaky breath and laughed it off. “they got me,” you muttered to yourself, trying to recapture the excitement you’d felt only moments ago. but that small jolt lingered, burrowing itself in the corners of your mind.

as the movie progressed even more, the tension became harder to shake. the pacing was slow, deliberate, each scene ratcheting up the dread inch by inch. you shifted in your seat, trying to remind yourself that it was just a movie; a movie from your most adored genre no less.

and then it happened.

a sudden, jarring jumpscare tore through the scene, shattering the carefully built silence. you flinched hard, your heart slamming against your ribs. you tried to laugh it off again, but it sounded weak, hollow.

from that point, the film seemed to unravel you piece by piece. the tension coiled tighter with every passing minute, and the excitement that once filled you was now replaced by a growing sense of dread.

your hands grew clammy, and your chest felt heavy, like something was sitting on it. a particularly gruesome moment flashed across the screen, and you recoiled, covering your mouth as your stomach twisted.

you tried to push through, telling yourself that you’d watched scarier movies before. but your body and your mind betrayed you, trembling with every noise, every shadow, every flicker of movement on the screen. by the time the film reached its most intense scene, you knew to yourself that you couldn’t take it anymore.

you slammed the laptop shut with trembling hands, as though cutting off the screen would sever the fear that had taken hold of you, but it didn’t. the silence that followed was deafening, pressing down on you with an unbearable weight.

the shadows in the room, once comforting and familiar, now seemed alive, shifting and stretching in the dim light. you couldn’t shake the feeling that something—someone—was watching you, hidden just beyond your line of sight. the thrill you once loved had morphed into something overwhelming, suffocating.

the pounding of your heart was relentless, thundering in your ears so loudly that it drowned out every other sound. you clutched your knees to your chest, your body trembling uncontrollably. the chill in the air seeped into your skin, but you couldn’t tell if it was from the air conditioning or the icy grip of your own fear.

you gaze darted around the room, your eyes flickering to every shadow, every corner, every object that might shift unexpectedly. your chest felt tight, each breath shallower than the last, as though the walls themselves were closing in on you.

but as your eyes wandered around frantically, they soon fell on kai’s door.

thr faint line of warm light spilling from beneath felt like a beacon of hope, a reminder that you weren’t alone. the thought of kai—his soft smile, his gentle voice—calmed the panic just enough for you to move.

you swallowed hard, your throat dry, and you finally pushed yourself to your feet. your legs wobbled beneath you, the lingering terror making every step toward his door feel heavier than the last.

now standing in front of his door, you hesitated for a moment, your trembling fist hovering just inches from its surface. wasn’t it silly to bother him over something as trivial as a scary movie? but the fear clinging to you said otherwise. taking a shaky breath, you knocked softly, the sound barely louder than a whisper.

not long after, the door creaked open, and kai appears, his soft, sleepy smile immediately easing some of the weight pressing on your chest. his presence was as warm and comforting as the light spilling from his room.

“hey,” he greeted gently, his voice still laced with drowsiness. “what’s up?”

you opened your mouth to answer, but no words came out. the fear that had driven you here suddenly felt stupid, and you hesitated once again, your eyes dropping to the floor. how could you explain that a movie—a silly horror movie—had shaken you up this badly?

kai tilted his head slightly, his expression curious but patient. then his gaze flickered to your trembling hands, and his face softened in an instant. the sleepiness in his eyes vanished, replaced by quiet concern.

“are you okay?” he asked, his voice steady but tinged with worry. he stepped forward, closer to you, gently placing a hand on your arm. “you’re shaking…”

the moment his hand touched your arm, you flinched ever so slightly, your body instinctively pulling back. kai immediately froze, his hand still hovering just above your arm, sensing the sudden tension in your body.

he then gently lowered his hand and gave you a soft, sheepish look, his expression shifting from confusion to concern.

“i’m sorry,” he said quietly, his voice gentle. “i didn’t mean to startle you...”

you shook your head quickly. “n-no, it’s not you, i…” you mumbled, your voice shaky. “i’m sorry,” you whispered, eyes avoiding his. “it’s just… the movie i was watching, um, scared me more than i anticipated, so i got a little jumpy. it wasn’t you, i promise..”

kai’s expression then softened, the understanding in his eyes replacing any trace of confusion. “don’t worry, it’s okay,” he reassures quietly.

he looked at you with such quiet understanding, as though he could see through the fear still clinging to you. with his hand now resting at his side, kai fidgeted with the edge of his hoodie nervously.

“do you… want to come in my room?” kai asked gently, his voice calm and inviting. “i can hang out with you until you feel better. no rush.”

you hesitated yet again, feeling a little embarrassed. you didn’t want to bother him, and definitely didn’t want to seem like you were overreacting. but the thought of being alone with the fear still swirling around you made it almost unbearable.

“i… i don’t want to intrude or anything,” you murmured, your voice meek.

kai smiled softly, his eyes warm and reassuring. “you’re not intruding at all. in fact, you can never ever bother me. i really want to make sure you’re okay.”

his words, gentle and kind, slowly worked through the lingering hesitation. the idea of being with him, in the safety of his presence, felt like exactly what you needed. you took a deep breath, steadying yourself, and nodded.

“okay,” you said, your voice a little more confident now. “i’ll come in.”

kai smiled wider, relief flickering across his face as he gently stepped aside, holding the door open for you. “i’m glad. you don’t have to be scared when you’re with me.”

you stepped into his room, the warmth of the space immediately soothing you. the soft, comforting presence of kai was all around, with the plushies scattered across his bed and the dim, inviting light. the tension in your shoulders started to fade, though the fear still lingered faintly, slowly melting away as he closed the door behind you and motioned for you to sit down.

“make yourself at home,” he said, his voice still gentle. “i can put on something distracting or we can just sit quietly. whatever you need.”

kai soon noticed how your body was still slightly tense, and the way your hands kept fidgeting together. he smiled softly to himself, trying to think of something that might help distract you or at least bring you some comfort.

“actually,” he began, his voice light and playful, “if you don’t mind, i’d like to introduce you to some of my plushies.”

you eyebrows furrowed slightly, but you found yourself intrigued by the idea. “plushies?” you echoed, a little confused but curious.

kai grinned, his eyes lighting up with a kind of fondness as he gestured toward his bed, where the plushies were scattered in a neat little row. “yeah, they’re kind of my thing. i’ve had some of them for years.”

he reached over and picked up a gray rabbit, its fur soft and plush under his fingers. “this one’s goguma,” he explained, holding it up for you to see. “goguma’s really special to me because my sisters have the same one, just in different colors. we all got them at the same time.” his smile softened as he looked down at the little rabbit, and you could tell it held sentimental value.

he then set goguma down and grabbed a small spider plush next, its legs scrunched in a way that made it look endearing rather than creepy. “this little guy’s been with me for about sixteen years. his name is... well, i’m not sure. i’ve just always called him ‘spider.’” he chuckles softly, his fingers brushing over its soft fabric. “he’s been through a lot, but i think that’s what makes him so special.”

next, he grabbed a brown rabbit, its floppy ears slightly askew and a cute orange bowtie around its neck. “this is shin-chan,” he continued, his tone fond and almost teasing. “i got him as a gift from one of my friends. he’s always been a bit of a troublemaker, but he’s my favorite when i need a good laugh.”

you couldn’t help but smile fondly as you watched kai handle each plushie with such care, his affection for them clear in the way he spoke. he moved on to a white rabbit holding a carrot. “this one’s tobin,” he said, sounding almost reverent. “i’m pretty sure tobin’s the quietest one of the bunch, but he’s still got a lot of personality. i guess that’s why he’s one of me and my friends’ favorites too.”

kai then reached for three variations of molang plushies, the soft, chubby bunnies in different colors looking equally adorable. “and these are… well, molang. they’re brothers.” he said, gesturing to each one. “they’re all the same, but i think that’s kind of the point. sometimes, things can be simple and still be perfect.”

finally, kai picked up the one that seemed to mean the most to him—a gray penguin plush, its round body and black eyes making it look surprisingly lifelike.

“and last but not least,” he said, cradling the penguin in his hands like it was the most precious of them all, “this is my favorite. it looks like a real penguin, doesn’t it?” he smiles softly, his expression softer now. “this one has been with me for not too long, but it resembles a real one so much, that it’s just too endearing.”

you couldn’t help but feel a little lighter at his words. the way kai had introduced each plushie with such care made it clear how much they meant to him. the thought of him sharing that with you—of letting you into a part of his world—was oddly comforting.

you smiled slightly, your voice quiet but sincere. “they’re all really adorable... you really love them all, don’t you?”

kai grinned, his eyes lighting up. “yeah, i do. i’ve had them for so long, and they’ve always been there when i needed them. and so i thought, maybe they can help you feel better, too.”

you nodded, the first real sense of ease starting to settle in. you couldn’t help but feel a little less nervous in this room, surrounded by the plushies and kai’s warm presence.

after the plushie introduction, the atmosphere felt warmer, more peaceful. you and kai sat on his bed, surrounded by the soft comforts of his plushies, their presence almost like a gentle embrace.

the conversation soon flowed easily between you two—light, easy chatter about everything and nothing. there was something so comforting about the way kai spoke, his voice low and steady as he casually asked about you, your thoughts, anything and everything that made the air between you feel safe.

you found yourself laughing quietly at little anecdotes about his past adventures with his friends and other plushies, and it helped ease the last of the tension that had been knotted in your chest.

as time passed, the conversation quieted, the two of you slowly sinking into a peaceful, comfortable silence. you found yourself stretched out on the bed, the soft cushions of his blankets wrapping around you like a warm cocoon. you were so comfortable, so content, that you didn’t realize how your eyes grew heavier with each passing moment, the weight of sleep slowly pulling you under.

a yawn escaped your lips, and you rubbed your eyes, feeling the exhaustion of the evening finally catch up to you. kai shifted beside you, his own eyes beginning to droop.

“are you… tired?” kai asked, his voice gentle, though you could hear the concern present. "do you want to sleep?"

you hesitated for a moment, blinking a few times, but the thought of retreating back to your own room felt terrifying—so far away from the warmth and safety of kai’s presence. the fear that had consumed you earlier was still there, buried in the corners of your mind. you swallowed hard, your cheeks flushing slightly.

“i… i think so,” you said softly, your voice barely above a whisper. “but… i really don’t want to go back to my room…”

kai glanced at you, his eyes flickering with a mix of concern and something else. he seemed to hesitate, the quiet room growing thicker with the uncertainty in the air. finally, after a long pause, he mustered up the courage to speak again.

“do you maybe want to… stay here? in my bed? just for the night?” he asks, his voice quiet but sincere, as if he were offering you a lifeline. “it might help… with the, uh… the fear.”

you blinked, caught off guard by his sudden suggestion, your heart skipping more than a few beats. it was such a simple offer, yet it meant so much at that moment.

“okay… i’ll stay,” you agreed, a soft blush creeping up your neck.

kai nods as he sat up and prepared to leave, but before he could go to sleep elsewhere, you impulsively reached out and grabbed his sleeve, your fingers trembling slightly.

“wait, um, could you… stay with me?” you asked, the words almost a whisper as you looked up at him with a sheepish, almost pleading expression. "i… i don’t want to be alone."

kai’s face flushed a little, and for a brief moment, he looked taken aback, his eyes wide. but then his expression softened, and he gave a small, almost nervous smile. "of course, i can stay,” he replied, a warmth in his voice that made your heart flutter.

you both settled back into the bed, the blankets shifting as you made yourselves comfortable. kai even handed you his favorite plush—the one that resembled a real penguin—with a soft smile, silently asking you to use it as a hugging pillow.

you held it close, feeling its comforting weight, even noting to yourself just how much it smelled like him, but it wasn’t enough to fully ease the nervousness that lingered in your chest.

there was still something missing, and you could feel it, deep down. the need for comfort, for something more. the need of an embrace directly from him.

you hesitated for a moment, your breath shaky, but then you quietly asked, "kai... could we... um… cuddle? just for tonight?"

the words left your lips before you could second-guess them, and as soon as they did, both your cheeks burned with a sudden, sharp heat. you barely noticed the way kai’s face flush as well until you saw his eyes widen in surprise.

he froze for a moment, his gaze flicking away as if he were processing what you had just asked. his mouth opened, but nothing came out at first—just a brief moment of silence before he stuttered over his words.

“c-cuddle?” kai repeated, his voice rising higher than usual, a nervous laugh barely escaping him. he shifted slightly, his fingers twitching at his sides like he didn’t quite know where to place them.

“i… i mean, yeah, sure,” he stammered, his voice softer, more tentative now. “if you want to…” he trailed off, still unsure, his gaze not quite meeting yours as he tried to navigate the unexpected situation. it was clear that he was more than a little embarrassed by your sudden request, though he wasn’t upset about it.

kai shifted again, his posture stiff and uncertain, but even so, his expression softened. it was clear he wanted to make you feel comfortable, but the shy blush on his face and the slight tremor in his figure made it obvious that he wasn’t entirely sure how to respond.

he finally let out a quiet breath, trying to steady himself, but his hands lingered uncertainly, as though asking for permission to get closer. it was a delicate moment, full of mutual vulnerability.

but before you knew it, kai’s arms gently wrapped around you, and the instant he pulled you close, your heart thumped wildly against your chest. but then, that initial rush of nervous energy slowly gave way to something entirely different—something warm, something comforting.

his embrace, though tentative at first, quickly became steady and reassuring as he held you just a little tighter. as you nestled into his arms, the tightness in your chest eased, the weight of the world on your shoulders lifting.

the fear that had plagued you only moments ago, the horror from the movie that still lingered in the back of your mind, slowly but surely started to fade into nothing. kai’s presence and hold was like a shield, blocking out everything but the warmth of his body, the steady rise and fall of his chest beneath your ear.

your thoughts began to scatter, the pieces of worry and unease breaking apart like mist in the sunlight. you felt a contented, almost dizzying sense of relaxation flooding your entire being. it was as if his arms was the only place you could be; the only place you needed to be.

kai, too, began to relax, his grip soft but firm, his body settling into a natural rhythm as he held you close. there was an unspoken sense of understanding between you, a calm that you couldn’t quite describe but felt with every inch of your being.

your body, once tense with worry, melted into the warmth of him, each breath you took slower, deeper, as you felt yourself surrendering to the comfort he offered.

and in the quiet, soft warmth of kai’s embrace, paired with the softness and tenderness of the plushies that surrounded you both, you finally found peace.

[raytorosaurus]

I have seen maybe half a season of TUA and didn’t read the comics so let me tell you seeing those panels where Vanya is yelling “We belong on that stage” (and in reference to herself and her taller blonde bass-playing brother) drawn in profile with literally Gerard’s haircut and outfit was a big shock to the system. I never even considered that he’d inserted elements of himself and his bandmates into TUA except for a bunch of weird edits people made comparing how much Aiden Gallagher looks like Frank but now I feel like I really need to read it.

im really looking forward to rereading all of the comics after this semester's over because i haven't done that since volume 3's run ended and i'll definitely make more coherent posts about it then but like. it's really really interesting to compare to all of gerard's other art because he is just...so distinctively him, even across different mediums and genres. tua and mcr and hesitant alien and kjna and his visual art etc etc etc like his artistic fingerprint is stamped so boldly and unapologetically all over them and that's something i really love about him. like his art, love it or hate it, is sooooo genuine always. even when he's purposely imitating other artists, he's very consciously doing it in his own voice, putting his own spin on it.

when i say tua and mcr are completely separate projects i mean it - i don't think one should only ever be discussed in relation to/in the context of the other - and, above all, tua is certainly not like...autobiographical, or a direct representation of real people/events. it's led by gerard but it has a different creative team than mcr does and that really shows as well - i definitely wanna talk ant this when i have more time but part of the reason im not sold on conweap as an album is because it's too umbrella academy - it's really evident that gerard was working on both of them at the same time, and letting one influence the other too directly. mcr's a band, not a Gerard Project, and umbrella academy is largely a duo (w gabriel bá), so they can't just be transplanted onto each other yk.

anyway I'm rambling but all this to say - tua isn't meant to be "about" mcr any more than bullets is "about" 9/11. but gerard's life was changed and shaped by his experiences in the music scene throughout his life, by dropping everything and living as a penniless artist, by becoming suddenly (in)famous, and that really shines through in tua. he says he drew inspiration from touring band life to write a dysfunctional family, and the dehumanising effects of fame and attention, and of being categorised and scrutinised on a private or public level, are huge themes - as is addiction, mental health, complicated grief.

like...i actually got into mcr through the tua comics lmaooo. i read volume 1 because of wonderful @blackmoldmp3 talking about it and immediately said oh. i need more from this dude's brain right now. and i was soooo not disappointed haha. i really am obsessed with quite a lot of the things gerard is also obsessed with as an artist. the particular themes and imagery and scenarios he's fixated on are really very consistent throughout everything he does - only the way they're discussed or portrayed does change over time. i don't rly subscribe to the idea of gleaning specifics abt artists' personal lives from their works because, beside all else, it just does them a huge disservice (that's my number one gripe with the popular talking pounts around hes alien and frank's solo work in particular; however "confessional" you wanna read art as, it's still art that was created with skill and intent.)

anyway that's way off topic dkfnfj. what i do love about this kind of thing is looking at distinct creations in the context of the rest of an artist's body of work. like...yeah, gerard's said there's a lot of mikey in klaus. has dressed similarly to vanya and the kraken and the seance at times etc etc. has compared himself to the rumor, because she's the one he relates to most. puts a lot of his familiar ideology surrounding music and performance into vanya. puts angry teenage vanya in a shitty punk band with her disillusioned teenage brother on bass, and puts a classical music prodigy in a punk band as an excellent guitarist, writing songs about killing the president etc etc. i could go on! because these things are just scattered everywhere through the comic, just like all of gerard thematic and aesthetic and ideologic fingerprints.

so what's reallyyy interesting to me is looking at umbrella academy as something gerard wrote on the road with mcr across multiple years. volume one was released while the tbp world tour was ongoing, and volume two only a few months after. the progression of parade -> tua -> conweap -> danger days is SOOOO fascinating to me, especially because one of the things that really works about danger days imo is the way it kind of shakes off some of the tua-style gritty cynicism and returns to mcr's defiant, extravagant theatricality. if you go through tua with a fine-tooth comb you'll definitely find the most direct comparisons to conweap, in terms of mcr. the way dd approaches the themes it has in common with tua is just.....so different, and so so mcr. and then you can see the at times self-referential development on those things in hesitant alien - AND THEN VOLUME 3 COMES AROUND AND LIKE. AUUUGGGGHHHHH the change and growth there is SO apparent. btw i don't mean "growth" "progression" etc in this post to mean "improving" - i just mean change and development in a neutral sense, bc it's so interesting to see it laid out there in an artist's body of work. but like. man it makes me crazeeee actually the way gerard picked tua back up....almost certainly around the same time mcr started discussing a potential reunion. and the way that foundations revisits and reconceptualises mcr's existing catalogue is paralleled in the way vol 3 of tua is, like...........like there's so much life lived there, between those things. gerard's even said he's changed his plan for the ending (if we ever see it 🥲) because he has more compassion for his own characters now and doesn't want to see them broken down for good. he says he's gotten better at listening to other people - for starters, he's a lot more conscious of his own subconscious racism/whiteness that came through at times in the original run and has expressed regret for that (namely, the entire main cast being white, with a couple of side characters being uncomfortably stereotyped).

but just like. augh. im not gonna lie man i have no idea what i've just typed im sorry it's probably so rambly bc I'm so dizzy rn and definitely am not gonna proofread it or whatever skdjfj but. I LOVE ART! I LOVE ARTISTS! I LOVE DIVING DEEP INTO AN ARTIST'S BODY OF WORK AND WATCHING THEM REINVENT THEMSELF AND/OR DOUBLE DOWN ON THEMSELF (SOMETIMES FOR BETTER, SOMETIMES FOR WORSE). obvs this fandom genuinely does have a big issue with invasive/un-self-aware parasocial behaviour but there's a difference between that and like. getting obsessed with a particular artist. that's so normal and in fact necessary to life imo. i think every artist literally has to have ppl like that i can't imagine any other way to live it's just a specific type of human connection at a distance baby. don't get me wrong tho i also wanna chew on his thigh. anyway.

my god. how did i get here what even was your question. tua. yes it's crazy. it's not for everyone for sure but it has enough of the shit that makes me crazzzzyyyyy that it got me into mcr which made me crazierrrr so. yes i can recommend. especially if ur like me and lovvvve stories that are a little bit fractured by design. that dance around big parts of the story, where there's as much significance in an absence or in a tiny background detail than there is in any dialogue or action scene. most of the criticism i see of tua is about the pacing but like. to my tastes it's a really great use of the comic medium yk? lmk if you want content warnings or something there are plenty skdjfj.

[xuune]

dropping this here because I kinda wish I'll snap out anytime soon from listening to the playlist you made for your last art, but here I am, booming 8:00, get me some, wyd, wounds will h.eal, and enclosed in my earphones at midnight. i think your music taste is fire, i'll give you that. mygods (ง •_•)ง

anw, I wanted to ask on how you decide and plan expressions/interactions for the characters when you draw your works? I always find your works to be so expressive. thanks in advance if you ever see this :OOO

p.s. I LOVE YOUR OCs, i think i'm in love with rael i genuinely wish they'll give me a headlock or smthn and i'll be happy p.p.s. i would marry your art if I could (i'm this fkn close 🤏 pls dont sue me)

(sorry for taking so long to reply, you'll know why once you read the rest of this lol)

im so glad that you had those as your faves bc those are some of mine too :D i've been seeing a few ppl rly enjoy 8:00, and if it wasn't for my friend recommending me that song, we wouldnt be here, and those drawings wouldnt have existed either, let alone the animatic i did

thank you for thirsting over my ocs, you don't know how much of a compliment that is whenever i see ppl react that way to them LOL. thats how i know i peaked with their design 😎 stay tuned for some other oc art, cuz im currently working on a piece for my friend's ocs. his ocs exist in the same universe as mine :)

i'll answer your question about planning expressions and interactions below, bc i have a lot to say about that:

when planning for expressions and interactions, i'm usually trying to answer a couple of these things:

what moment do i want to highlight

why is this moment significant

how do these characters feel in the moment, how to they react to each other, what's their motivations

what body language best answers the question above ^

basically, i'm asking myself "what's the scene?" -> "what do the characters feel in that moment?" -> "how do they act this out to convey that?" (that's how i was taught to read scripts for plays. you must understand character motivations before you figure out how to act their feelings out)

it's very important to have a good balance of body language and dialogue to convey the mood if/when appropriate, since sometimes strictly relying on dialogue to sell the moment w/o body lang or vice versa can tank the execution

i assume that you're more interested in how i planned the interactions for them sharing music? lmk if there's like specific ones, bc i can explain more for whatever else it may be

anyways, i start off with scripts of some kind. my scripts can be very barebones that just note a specific scene (i.e. "working at desk, listen to music together before class starts"), or that i build a moment based on a piece of dialogue (i.e. "better not queue anything lame"). here's the notes i made when i made the 8:00 animatic, since thats big on body language

i wanted to get down my main ideas first, which was figuring out the the lyrics i wanted to use paired with dialogue to match. i dont show my thinking much on some of my notes, but what i was getting at this:

story moment: dk connecting the context of the song to his intimate moment with bkg

key moments: waking up, playing with hands, eye contact w/ bkg

i didn't expand on the ideas for how those moments would look until i actually started thumbnailing for the animatic, which i showed briefly here. here's what i kept in mind for their expressions/interactions:

dk shies away from directly confronting bkg outwardly expressing his feelings for him via the song. he avoids it and changes the topic verbally to make the conversation lighthearted -> "what expresses avoidance?"

bkg is direct about his feelings, his actions and expressions must convey a direct confrontation, an attempt to make dk acknowledge how he feels about him thru the song and potentially get a response from him -> "what expresses straightforwardness?"

here's what i decided would visually answer those questions

the implications of character's expressions also factors in the circumstances of their situation. without the context, the execution tends to fall flat. if you didn't know that they were listening to a song that's all about romantic pining, then you probably would've been questioning why the fuck are they just staring at each other, or assumed that one is shy of the physical interaction when that's not the point; its the dawned realization and the acknowledgement of the other's feelings.

my other drawings for that thread followed the same kind of planning tbh, lol. all those drawings had the lyrics set the stage for how the characters are feeling, and i'd have to figure out what about their facial expressions and body language best matches the context of the situation. here's this brief example:

but yeah, that's generally how i plan for expressions/interactions. sometimes i just get a rush of interaction ideas that is centered on one specific question i want to explore, like:

what do their mundane parts of life look like?

how do they physically react to realizing their feelings for the other?

how is someone anxious about the other person's perception of them in the comic i'm drawing?

and then build off from there. hope that helped :D

[fucktheark]

(some) creepypasta/marble hornets music hcs :)

these are mostly from my own playlist they aren't accurate at all this is just 4 funsies lololol

also i highly doubt anyone will even see this post but if u do drop a song rec plz im struggling finding new music </3

tim (specifically him cs masky is too busy going apeshit 4 music)

old man music but like cool old man music (this is just what my father listens to LOL)

thinks he's got peak taste and snickers at everybody else's song choices

breathe - pink floyd

pet sematary - ramones

the chain - fleetwood mac

aerials - soad

lover, you should've come over - jeff buckley

hoodie

i pulled this out of my ass tbh but imagine 80s fan brian

kinda likes lil peep but would never tell a soul cs he thinks he's too old for it

doesn't rly share his music with anyone bcs he's afraid they're not gonna clown him for it

she's in parties - bauhaus

the brightside - lil peep

the ghost in you - psychedelic furs

messages - a flock of seagulls

hotel california - the eagles (cz y not)

jane

i never rly obsessed over her so this is js based on the vibes i get from the art i've seen of her (so pretty bruh)

echolalia - faetooth

nine while nine - sisters of mercy

closet - fleshwater

engine no. 9 - deftones

frigid and spellbound - spectral wound

nina

no way totally unexpected music

i think eventually she grew out of screamo and scene but never rly let emo go entirely

acid - ghost town

get away with murder - jeffree star (yikes)

what you need - bmth

freaxx - brokencyde (she's been in love with this album since it came out)

vampires will never hurt you - mcr

jeff

i like think that after what he did to his family he just kinda checked out from earth and stopped keeping up with most pop culture, so he's still listening to the same music he did back then.

peak edgy middle schooler vibes

never tires of his playlist

every now and again he comes across something new and gets obsessed with it immediately and probably forever

yen - slipknot

makedamnsure - taking back sunday

don't go - bmth

tourniquet - marilyn manson

crewcabanger - chelsea grin

toby

I-C-P FOREVER WITH THE JUGGALOSSSSSS

still enjoys twiztid even after the beef but secretly because it makes him feel like a poser

also likes jeff buckley but feels kinda cringe for it

the stalker - icp

house of mirrors - icp

my 1st time - dark lotus

2nd hand smoke - twiztid

grace - jeff buckley

liu

same reasoning as jane i know like nothing about this dude and even less about sully so i'm not even gonna attempt .

i fw his vibe tho

eye - smashing pumpkins

the man who sold the world - nirvana

heaven - talking heads

the sickness - imminence (he's gotta be a lil emo come on)

siamese twins - the cure

eyeless jack

this one is kinda hard tbh but considering his hypersensitivity to sound, i feel like he wouldn't enjoy anything too noisy

likes songs with a lot of bass because he can feel the bass reverberating through his body when he wears headphones

soft/airy vocals!!!! he hates screaming

doesn't rly stick with a specific genre just whatever makes his ears tingle lol

a forest - the cure

dark stone - holy fawn

hide and seek #1 - plastic tree

the thing - pixies

collabo - june freedom

BEN

bitch spends so much time on the internet he discovers new music every day

listens to everything but tries to flex the really obscure shit he finds in the depths of youtube (he wants to be cool but it's kind of pathetic.)

his playlist is MASSIVE and a mess, he usually has to skip through half of it before finding something he actually likes

i don't know why but he'd be into haunted mound

plays the majora's mask soundtrack when he can't think of anything to listen to

husqrider - turnabout

fentanylism - opiated devilsperm

starting over - lsd and the search for god

gou zin zan goku - deviloof

ugliest - $uicideboy$

laughing jack

he's old af and probably doesn't get modern music tbh

classical music it is

and opera

i'm not gonna make a whole playlist but he really loves erlkönig because of the story lol

[rjschoicesstuff]

Musical Chairs game at the start of Book 1 + final 3some scene at the end of Book 2. How would those be different for Rippy + her Gabe and Cas? I think I remember you doing some drawings for the musical chairs some months back but still

Musical chairs scene:

I like the scene as it is because it gives you the choice whose lap to sit on + who to show interest to and I think that works best for Choices I guess. + I think it's funny with them both wanting to be chosen and getting pissy at each other and stuff and having that power in the scene. (Tho I think it could also work with mc sitting down and the choices are more about how you'll let mc react)

Howeverrr I do feel like Ripley would be like 'okay I'll join in' and sit down herself. Both due to being more into letting people come to her and show their interest and because she wonders if Cas will just back off if he has to play like that (he doesn't). I also like how Gabriela would act extra nervous while Cas is kinda just circling Ripley like she's prey lmao. When Gabe sits on her lap she's just comfortable and they're both rly giddy and stuff, acting a bit silly, Cas is definitely rolling his eyes at them. While when Cas sits in her lap she gets shy and a bit nervous and he'd tease her for it lol. I think it'd be so funny like everyone is just having fun while those 2 r just in a whole competition over who gets to sit in Ripley's lap. Tho it's only really about Ripley for Gabe, at that point in Time Cas is just trying to keep Gabe away from her because he can't stand seeing her with other people.

Linking the artworks of the scene again cuz they apply here hehe

3some scene:

(Note that due to my version being written before book 2 being out, when I speak about book 2, I just go with the canon lore and backstories and just reimagine the scene if I feel like it'd be different with Ripley and stuff)

Ok bye the cut didnt work but stop reading here if u dont wanna see nsfw ish talk:

So like I like this scene and I think they gave The People what they wanted lol. And it felt like a sign like ok these 2 rly have Accepted that mc loves them both and can love them both at the same time + they have accepted each other too now, u kno? Like by the end of book 2 they have become a package deal to me.

But ok that said, I like to imagine it wouldn't have been a 3some. Like it'd still be too soon for Cas and Gabe and instead it's mainly just heated kissing and caressing and stuff. And everyone, including Ripley is still sorta figuring out how to do this whole thing with 3 people. It'd be awkward, I think they'd kinda be in each others way sometimes and stuff. But they'd all be like rly giddy abt it lol, they're having fun and that's what matters. And cuddles and talking afterwards.

It's like that too in my version when they get more intimate as a trio for the 1st time, I honestly don't know if they'd ever have a 3some until becoming a triad, because I think they'd both just wanna throw themselves on Ripley, but Ripley feels a bit like a fish out of water when she's mainly on the receiving end? So she prefers just one on one until then. I think part of the fun for her is seeing them Together too. I like the idea of maybe one tipsy 3some that happens before becoming a triad where the next day everyone is just like 😳🤭😳 u know which emoji is Ripley. Maybe they never even rly have that talk like ok we're a triad now lol im derailing so bad im calling it quits now LOL.

[superdeluxeaverage]

I thimk megalopolis was one of the most shitass movies ive ever seen but im glad i saw it in theatres and am gonna see it again with my sister thursday like the best way to describe it would be that it feels like a bad adapatation of a book that doesnt exist there was so much straight up stupid moments in it it felt like unreal spoilers if any1 even gives a shit

Theres this scene where adam drivers gets shot but his face heals with the power of the megalon and he has his face in wraps and when he takes his wraps off and reveals his healing face it plays THE most generic indian and tabla musical cue that in no way matches with the rest of the soundtrack and puts this fucking snapchat ass filter where theres like doubles of him behind him to his left and right infinitely going abd i was like is this fuckinh chowder or some shit. Ill never say the movie was good tho cause theres something i see no one talking abt atleast on letterboxd presumably cause they love deepthroating autuer dick so much even (or especially) when they kno the auteur in question is a creep but there was this weird subplot where there was this pop star with a like "virgin teen" image and they leaked a sex tape of her and the main character so the main character was arrested for being a pedophile but then it was immediately after revealed that the tape was faked (?) (They never say how they just say it was faked) and that the pop star was actually not from america abd was in her 20s. This whole subplot is obv coppola trying to exonerate all his sex offender best friends and its such a gross kneejerk response like why say the tape was fake but then also say oh shes a bad person dishonest liar too lol. Then when its showing news reports of it it cuts to her lile having changed her image to a like pop punk image and making more sexually suggestive music instead of conservative clean music like b4 so its supposed to be like she just moved onto the next image unfazed cause shes a liar its such a cringe subplot and it happens in the span of like 15 mins and is never mentioned again and very clearly is just supposed to be a rebuttal to accusations and scandals sooo fkn embarrassing especially given the fact hes been trying to get this movie made his whole life LOL the two (yes 2) other women in the movie are also treated super sexistly like the main characters love interest has no personality aside from always standing behind her mans artistic vision and passion and "completing" him then the aubrey plaza character is just supposed to be the sexy woman who sleeps with any1 for power like coppola def most sexist guy alive ever the fact he made that movie dedicated it to his wife at the end yup this man is going to hell. Probably the hardest movie to talk abt cause its not u kno deserving of praise the only frame of reference is camp rly like in that same ballpark not so bad its good but just a very wtf type of movie. Im also scared cause shia labeouf was in this doing a type of scary dennis hopper character (coppola even saying working with him reminded him of hopper) and obv this film flopped and is not gonna make any1 famous since even the acting was p bad from every1 or just v disconnected and unrelatable on a human level but watching this has me worried that labeouf is gonna thrive with piece of shit directors by using the dennis hopper/klaus kinski method of having ppl praise ur "energy" when its just that u only take roles where u play sadistic fucks cause ur a sadistic abusive fuck so ppl get convinced ur a great actor when ur not even acting.

[skautism]

i never played/watched sonic as a kid but i've decided it's time. do you have any recs on literally anything sonic related?

YES!!!!!

tv: SONIC X!!!!!!!!!!! the dub is a bit wonky with cut scenes and localization nonsense due to being 4kids but it’s fun, the sub is “better” but who give a shit. also sonic prime and sonic satam are rly good

games:

2d- sonic 2 is basically better sonic 1, sonic cd is a pain in the ASS if you want the good ending but is a rly fun and colorful game with some of the best music from the classic era, i haven’t played any of 3/knuckles or mania but they get praised a LOT!!!!! also sonic rush my beloved

3d- the adventure games! also i’ve heard p-06 is amazing if you want a functional version of sonic 06 but it’s not done yet and i’ve yet to play it lol. also sonic unleashed gets a lot of praise these days and im convinced half of it is people being nostalgic but i haven’t played it so i’ll keep my mouth shut

personal faves- i <3 sonic battle its a silly fighting game with a surprisingly great story for a gba game and has good character moments for shadow. i also love shadow 05 to bits and pieces i did not buy the thing with the manual and everything for nothing but its also a pain in the ass cuz of all the endings

comics: IDW is rly good, archie is. something alright. if u wanna check out archie i just jumped ahead to the ian flynn era which DOES lend to some confusion but it’s less of a Fucking Mess and has a massive improvement with the art being more consistently good. and scourge he’s a bastard and i’m obsessed with him

i think this might be entirely too much starting information oops. autism floodgates

tldr: sonic x good, sonic 2 fun, adventure games fun, sonic battle and shadow 05 favorites, idw good, archie long and confusing but worth it

[inkykeiji]

https://docs.google.com/document/d/1-4fGPKi34xddcFk3msZFnc_UWYCMndkquW7UkGQE83I/edit

AAAA OKAY SORRY SORRY TRY NOW!!!

-💤

IT WORKS NOW eeeee yay thank you so much!!!!! this made me so emotional (in a good way!)!! i just cannot tell you how honoured i am that you did this for one of my stories like.....i genuinely don’t even have the words to describe how incredible that is and how lucky i am to have you here with me. thank you so much for sharing this with me, i will cherish it so very much ( ˘͈ ᵕ ˘͈♡)

my thoughts on each song beneath the cut!!!

family tree - ethel cain

i totally see what you’re saying here!!! ugh god i love ethel cain so much, her music is just so perfect for so much of my work in terms of vibes and atmosphere yk what i mean??? so i was so glad to see that u included her here!!

demolition lovers - mcr

there’s a dozen reasons in this gun has got to be one of my favourite lyrics ever, wow!!! but also, i loved the whole last minute or so of this song!! i know that’s where the lyrics you selected are from, but i just feel like that entire final verse describes the trajectory of dabi and reader’s relationship??? from their first meeting to that last scene with keigo in the hospital.

i would die for you - in this moment

okay, YES. yes, i completely get what you mean LMAO. just that ravenous, all-consuming, downright obsessive love, us against the world type, those who continuously swallow each other whole just to spit them back out again and repeat the entire process. loved it so much <33 VERY dabi x reader!!!

voodoo doll - the funeral portrait

oof okay this song hit so hard it made me sob. as i’ve said before, tag you’re it is a very personal story to me, having grown up with and lived with (and been parented by) addicts for my entire life. because, honestly, addiction doesn’t just hurt the user, it hurts everyone who cares about the user, too. i’m not gonna go too deep into that but i loved everything you had to say about this song and i agree with you one million percent, you hit the nail right on the head!!!

life vest - the material

okay let me just take a moment to bask in the fact that the motel scenes are your favourite because i worked SO insanely hard on those scenes LMAO <3 two bodies with one beating heart oh i love love love this. but yeah!!! at that moment in the story especially, dabi is her life vest; for the majority of their time there (right up until the end) he discards his manipulation and casts off his selfishness and allows himself to just be with her, to be there for her, for completely selfless reasons, because he truly does love her. it is a crucial point in their relationship!

tears don’t fall - bullet for my valentine

ooooh yes okay!!! one of the lyrics that really stuck out to me in this song is there’s always something different going wrong / the path i walk’s in the wrong direction because it feels very keigo, especially since he was the golden boy who fell from grace, essentially. adding onto your selection of lyrics, the her conscience calls the guilty to come home also kind of reminded me of the guilt reader feels for leaving keigo, and how that guilt kind of repeatedly calls for her to come back to him, sometimes in the form of keigo himself.

everybody sells cocaine - motionless in white

holy fuck i LOVED this song!!! and you’re SO right, btw!!! dabi is constantly tempting keigo, taunting keigo, ‘testing’ keigo in the most twisted, unfair ways ever. i don’t even have anything to add, i just agree with you wholeheartedly.

jupiter - flower face

omg yes this is VERY dabi x reader during their budding relationship in part one especially. also, these silly games we play / stupid ways to make you stay / my heart’s split open on display / i can’t wait another day pretty much encompasses them fully <33 also also, rly loved the lyric it must be holy to feel something so pure makes me think of dabi as he initially starts to truly fall in love with her—real, pure, sincere! okay i just got to the end of the song and tbh, i think there’s even an argument to be made here for part two as well, and the way their relationship progresses, the concept of home, etc.

luna - wisp

feeling u hardcore on the chest aching with this song. it’s just the melody, you know??? it feels so infused with raw emotion. this one also kind of reminds me of the sex scene in part one AHAHAHA but that’s more due to how hazy and fragmented reader is <3

bottles - the material

oh yeah, for sure! alcoholism is still substance abuse, and it is still addiction. oof this is another one that made me like, super emotional. just rly struck a chord!! i love everything you’ve pointed out here, and i also love how the chorus (in particular the lyrics those bottles are everywhere / and i can’t be everywhere / to keep them from you) reminds me so much of how reader feels towards keigo’s addiction for the majority of the series; she so desperately wishes to save him from himself, she so desperately wants to help, to be useful, but she truly cannot be everywhere cataloging all of his actions all of the time

aaaah WOW sleepy!!!! incredible playlist, thank you again for sharing it with me and the rest of us here on inkykeiji!!! your selection of songs and the order in which you curated them was just genius, i am so blessed to be able to experience this <333

[hoenn-hakase]

what was the TPP moment that gave you the most writing fuel? one that still rly sticks in ur head. (feel free to ramble)

Gosh, that's both super hard and super easy to answer! Twitch Plays Pokemon has had SOOOO many memorable moments that immediately come to mind that have captured my imagination or turned into a major part of my lore, there's just too many to name. However, there's a lot of moments that mean so much to me but I haven't written anything (or at least not published it) about those moments. I think I have fics either plotted out in my head or partially written for just about every single Randomized Run we've done because rattling the formula always brings out some of the coolest concepts and creativity within the community. Like I have an entire backstory and character arc for Lorekeeper James from Randomized Alpha Sapphire, which a lot of people fell in love with this random Bug Catcher suddenly getting boss music. Or when Trevor in Randomized Y turned out to be the Flare Admin we had to fight at the Poke Ball Factory, but then we had a crash and my heart just breaks thinking about the scene afterward where we went "back in time" to before all the kids met up at the park. And now Trevor, Calem, and Venus all awkwardly trying to pretend nothing happened while staring each other down with the utmost scrutiny as each wonders if the other two is aware of what happened. But don't worry, all this causes him to have a bit of a breakdown and soul searching before turning against Team Flare to go rescue Abomasnow. Or even as recently as Randomized Violet+ and how I've been a bit obsessed with Terra and her misadventures for the last few months and her showing up again as the host for Super Gauntlet Ruby is not helping that. Heck, Randomized Platinum was probably the biggest world building run for my lore it's one of the three establishment fics I've had partially started that I feel needs to be either written or fully explained to point to why the Haji TPP Verse is the way it is! And hhhnnngggg.... so much more...

Of course there's also a difference between the lore to come out of things (which I've written for after being inspired by other authors or artists in the community) and the onscreen moments that seemed to change everything. And while I have a lot of runs I love, a few I can point to as "THIS still hits hard" are things like my very first fanfic I posted to the TPP subreddit was in the aftermath of Leech King's death. I remember being at work, plotting out an entire series that would follow Abe and the others trying to get to the bottom of who had her murdered and why, having Alakazam and Venomoth that joined around the same time being hired detectives, and ICU coming into her own as the heir to the throne and whatnot, but it didn't get very far and even looking back was pretty bad writing. I did eventually get around to writing the post game like I wanted with my Much Ado About Blue series so that's definitely continued to be a wealth of writing fuel. Heck, when I started my Connections series, the inspiration was from Faba kicking our ass eight ways to Sunday in Waning Moon and the feeling there was probably a personal connection there. But I literally only planned for like seven chapters if even that because I didn't expect myself to start novelizing the run as a way to lead up to that moment. Originally the plan was to skip between certain cutscenes to establish lore on Quips. (My doc is still simply labeled "Hau" even though the story has grown since then.) But for moments? I mostly do angst and dramas anyway, but one piece I'm rather proud of and STILL upset about is my short for the ending of Pyrite. Ugh, the bitterness and how everyone and their dog had an opinion on the ending of that run and poor Eeyup getting dropped after we finished instead of getting some kind of proper send off or victory lap. Or on the note of Evan and Azure, this spur of the moment piece that's kind of hinted at. I love when I'm archiving runs and something comes up like a Glitch or crash, or something so unexpected I just INSTANTLY get the idea and need to write a short for it.

But I must say when I read this question, the first thing that came to mind was my novel for Blazed Glazed. Holy crap, this Run changed a lot of things for me. For one, being an original ROM hack means there's an entire world that has been a fountain of writing fuel for me I intend to get back to eventually. Who are these original characters? What is their story? How does Tunod work? How does it connect to other games it made a guest appearance in? Team Fusion showed up in RW2 meaning there's a whole history there with these guys. I made special edits of the Team leaders. It's kind of insane because I had written stuff for other runs before, obviously, but this was like all consuming on my brain. And you know what started it off? ...I started watching the VODs because it seemed like there wasn't much talk about it for me to know what was happening. We got our starter, met with THE INVENTOR, met Blake (our NPC partner for the long haul) and suddenly there was a Glitch. I was already intrigued by the opening, but when the Inventor was supposed to follow and instead became frozen and uninteractable, my mind started running. I paused my viewing and started writing. It's by far the longest series I've written and what made it so fascinating in a way was writing as I watched meant there are several points I didn't know where the story was going. So I may plan on something, but then it didn't turn out that way so how do I rework the script to account for the unexpected character appearances? Freezes? Glitches? How about a random detour to find specific teammates? And don't get me wrong, like most games, the actual plot can seem vague or even silly in the writing sometimes, but then that makes it fun to try to flesh out what the deeper reasoning could be for why something is happening? And then tying it into the larger TPP universe has just been... ahh~ <3

Anyway, this has gotten really long but I hope that answers your question. I'm sorry this kind of turned into one big shameless plug. Dang I've written a lot, but I love this fandom so much. I can't even ;w;

[zisurru]

vomshit anon here, sorry for delayed responses i was travelling and now we have Guests… it’s slowing down my reading a bit too

i don’t think i have anything that interesting 2 say about this but i reread the scene and got distracted…

i do love the ‘if i said something just right’ bit, but the lead up to it also makes me insane…

‘“Don’t talk of her,” I said.

‘“Very well. I was talking of the plantation. Not her. Her! Your lady love, your fancy.” He smiled at me. “You know, I had it all my way finally in the end, didn’t I? But I was telling you about my young friend and how…”

‘“I wish you would play the music,”

‘You know, I had it all my way finally in the end, didn’t I?’ ARE YOU KIDDING ME…

like there is soo much going on in those like 4 pages… i know i’m not saying anything intelligent and just quote dumping but…

‘“Did I kill him or did I not kill him!”’ He flashed the at me now with a pointing finger. “What’s your guess”

‘“You did not.” I said numbly. “Because you invited me to go with you, and would never have invited me to share that kill.”

‘“Ah, but! Did I kill him in a rage because you would not go with me!”

i am looking and reading into this he has definitely done that before

‘“Well, did I kill him?” he asked me again.

‘“No, you did not,” I said again, though I could just as easily have said the opposite. I was concentrating on keeping my face a mask.

‘“You’re right. I did not,” he said. “It excites me to be close to him, to think over and over, I can kill him and will kill him but not now. And then to leave him and find someone who looks as nearly like him as possible. If he had brothers… why, I’d kill them one by one.”

“(…) There are no other vampires! And this is where you live and this is where you stay!” He looked confused for the moment, as if raising his own voice had confused him. “I take care of you. You don’t need anything.”

so i think i prefer lestat in interview, or the way he’s written; i still like him a lot in the later books, he’s a little freak, and i do love tvl & his ‘backstory’ (sans the marius parts)… and i know i already said but like which parts of their life together, and the things about lestat that louis focuses on and chooses to share, or even reveals seemingly by accident are very compelling 2 me. like they spent 70 years together! they were a family and louis didn’t know shit about him! like meeting lestat, his death, the way lestat killed him is the most important thing that ever happened to him… and like i don’t think he even knew his last name…it’s his one story, when he meets daniel he doesn’t know if lestat is alive, he’s been alone for some 40 years… i am rambling and this doesn’t have much to do with what u asked me sorry…

ok abt the father / daughter incest… it’s not even rly my bag, like it’s not something that i seek out in fiction as opposed 2 other things i’m weird about… but i guess apart from the taboo of it, and the disgust that can be a compelling enough component for a sexual fantasy, the father taking the daughter for a wife and turning her into a mother / pumping her full of babies etc is the natural conclusion / fulfilment of the patriarchal family structure. like taken to an extreme but the same.

you know what i like about lestat in iwtv is this almost lack of self-awareness that makes him weirdly vulnerable? like he's what, 30 when they meet, basically still a youngish man, and he's clumsily trying to manipulate louis and making threats ("cowardly threats" he says in i think tvl) and even though louis is afraid of him there's this sense that he doesn't really know what he's doing either, kind of stumbling around wringing his hands and yelling but not ultimately all that in control. like he's just as scared as louis of not knowing anything

however tvl+ lestat is such a little guy to me, i want to clasp his neck in my jaws and shake him until he stops moving

"the father taking the daughter for a wife and turning her into a mother / pumping her full of babies etc is the natural conclusion / fulfilment of the patriarchal family structure" hmm interesting! a lot of erotica seems to me like it involves exaggerated/heightened gender roles, like ideas of "ideal" manhood and womanhood that are almost caricatured? so that tracks

[eundiarys]

hi jules Let’s play this game! get to know each other more (not a game But yeah)

questions; 1. favorite song, 2. ult group, 3. song/show rec for each other, 4. favorite show, and um 5. something u want me to know abt u 🤗

i’ll answer first 🤞 1. rn it’s lost in you by oftn or vintage by niki, 2. hard question probs enha tho 😓😓,3. song rec??? idk um inside by junny (one of my fave artists tbh) and for a show rec js for fun i’d suggest abyss for sure but there’s like A lot of slow motion scenes LMAOOO

4. i mainly watch dramas but my all time fave is probs abyss and ummmm weak hero class one BUT ROMANCE WISE??? i could list so many. but mainly shooting star (didn’t finish it…), and 5. random fact but i cannot draw a straight line with a ruler 😟😟 IT JS ALWAYS LOOK SO WONKY TO ME BUT EVERYONE ELSE SAYS ITS STRAIGHT 😭😭😭

these were random questions i js made up WHILE writing this ask LOL but enjoy 😁😁😁

HI KAYLA ⭐️ OK LETS GO THIS IS CUTE

1. MY FAVOURITE SONG RN. is ermm i canf pick 😅😅 but i’ll go for seasons cuz it reminds me of soobin (Me when i am in lobe with soobin 💗💗💗💗💗)

2. DEFINETLY TXT AND ENHYPEN (especially soob and wonki <3). they are the only bgs i genuinely rly enjoy aside from them i rly just like girlgroups 💯 for ggs i really like ive newjeans and lesserafim! they are new but idc i was an izone stan and they make amazing music SO THEY R ON MY FAVES LIST 😁🤟🤟

3. hmm maybe restless by bibi??? it’s my favourite song by her! i think you like this kind of genre ???? im also listening to ur song rec rn! i really like it i have no idea what genre this is but i want to get into it more so please recommend ur faves!!!!! ^_^

4. I MOSTLY WATCH DRAMAS TOO. either kdramas or just shows tbh,, i don’t think i can pick a favourite T_T i either just love it 10/10 or very interesting 8/10 or just like it it’s okay or just stop watching cuz its bad 💯 a show id definetly recommend is flower of evil! one of the best kdramas ive watched, thriller romance where the husband is a psycho (?) kind of and the wife is a detective!! i didn’t worded it perfectly but it’s amazing trust me!!!! and maybe beauty inside if u want some cute romance :-) that’s also one of my fav romances ever, especially the second couple 😭💔

this was fun THANK U KAYLA

[brokenbrainbambi]

Favorite Kingdom Hearts game?

ohhhHHH This is so hard omg

i think ultimately it's a tossup between dream drop distance and 358/2 days and the first one but i really genuinely love all of them!! like my least favorite is re:com bexcause of the gameplay but also its still up there in terms of the story for me so theres rly no way to go wrong!!

days was the first kh game i played — i KNOW, really weird starting poimt, especially in retroapect (quite possibly the funniest thing i said as a kid was "wait who the fuck is sora") but i had a ds and my parents knew i wanted to play the cool anime disney games so they got me it for christmas!!! and i just fell in lovE. to this day i think the way that the story unfolds in that game is so fun and innovativ3 like the day by day and note structure??? begging for a proper remake SO BAD

i like the first because honestly i just like the air of mystery it has that the games try and stay true to but is hard to genuinely replicate like omg...like on the first playthrough you so rarely know wtf is going on behind the scenes whuch is just sooo captivating

amd ddd i partially just like bc the dream eaters are soooo fun to me partially because riku is my favorite character but again very similar to days i genuinely respect the like. like not many games are told Concurren5tly like that i logve love love love when stories take Risks in their like omg format i guess???

aNYWAY SORRY THAT WAS PROHABLY JUST TOO MUCH listen kingdom hearts is the zeries that got me hooked on both gaming AMD music (yoko shimomura almost inspired me to try scoring games as a kid, i even wrote a few long lost compositions bc of her) so sjfjjejrjr you asked the right/wrong person!!

[medicatedonwater]

Dies ist nur ein music review

So sometime last year i met this rad girl who also listened to warped tour bands. As she described it it’s like she started in the 2010s or something and just never stopped. And for me, I started around 2009 like rly seriously playing the 04-06 albums on repeat playing halo and suddenly clicking with “The Phrase that Pays” by The Academy Is…

That song totally kicked off a series of me getting hella invested in punk rock / emo / etc but i never had like an actual scene phase and i’m living it now haha. I so wish i’d listened to the albums these songs had come from. I wonder how it could have influenced my life back then, but whatever, i’m still here now and finally getting to it!!

I at first wanted to listen to all the Warped Tour Compilations and i was sad to see FUCKING TWTTR killed warped tour. fkn garbage fire site. (well, warped tour SHOULD be coming back next year and i am so hella hyped i can’t wait to get the most exquisite sunburn as i claw and scrape my way to the oasis that is a hose of fresh? water.)

I quickly got through all the warped tour albums from 1996 through 2018? 2019? lotsa music i missed out on. stuff i really wish i *had* been around for but most of the 2010s is voided out for me, between floundering around in college and part time jobs and rediscovering alternative music around 2015. This project intends to listen to the full discography of *every* artist with a song on a warped tour compilation. I’m skipping the DVDs but also including the punk-o-rama albums which did a crossover with warped tour in 1997, and including the european and australian tours cuz why the hell not. Throwing in the local stations top songs list starting at 1997 cuz of how much they’ve influenced my modern taste in music. I’m mostly using spotify - for artists not on spotify i’m just listening to the album (or single/EP) that particular listing came from. youtube is clunky as hell with no background play and i need some form of organization and spotify i have hella mix CDs on…

Anyway, the first album is Punk-o-rama from 1994, with FUCKING, BAD RELIGION. OH MY GOSH IVE WANTED TO listen to these guyses discography for AGES.

I honestly, like, right out the gate they’ve very politically on fire, like, they’re saying the kinds of things people need to fucking hear. they’re so real for it, and as they grow older some of the stuff is kinda tamer, the sound softens a bit, but hot damn if “the kids are alt-right” doesn’t point out the ongoing problems that still need solvation.

and of course they’ve got the classic crazy taxi songs too :D (omg can’t wait to hear the offspring tooooooo)

I recall the warped tour i attended back in 05 that bad religion had performed there the previous day. I don’t believe they were there for that particular warped tour date tho. I would absolutely love to see them live or at the very least get some merch :3 they’re just so, raw. so real. “Punk Rock Song” is still stuck in my head, and i’ve already moved on to NoFX (which, holy fuck they start out crass but mb it’s the bias speaking… they get good FAST)

Bad religion was a great time through and through, ramping up to No Control with some real bangers. Against the Grain had the song “21st Century (Digital Boy)” which I’d all but forgotten about since my first exposure to it nearly four years ago. Stranger than Fiction and The Grey Race had some of my old favorites like “Infected” and “Ten in 2010” with “Gods Love” coming along in 2003. New Maps of Hell for whatever reason lives in my head as a rly good album.

A lot of that early energy was really important for setting the stage for an awesome presence.

Apparently liked 98 Songs… this may go down over time but hey, they’re good. heck.

The particular showing for Punk-O-Rama was “Do What You Want” from Suffer in 1998. Can’t say I entirely remember the track, oh wait hang on, guess i’ll break all the fucking rules and go to hell with superman!! yeah no this song is lit af. love this scene. i gotttttta see these guys at some point.

Next on the docket is NoFX… I’m to “Usa-Holes” off Wolves in wolves clothing.

See, I knew I was amongst cool folx when i went to a party and this dude had a bad religion shirt.

Looking forward to more from this project!

OH, I TOTALLY FOUND TOUR WATER THE OTHER DAY AND IT FKN AWAKENED SOMETHING IN ME.