#the most i've ever done!

[acasualcrossfade]

Whumpril Day 30: Holding Hands

Squeeze My Hand: A Parallel Story

Written for @whumpril Day 30: Holding Hands | Human Shield | “Don’t let go.”

Stranger Things

Steve Harrington (age 6) and his mother

Eddie Munson (age 6) and Uncle Wayne

When both kid Steve and Eddie are hurt, both have someone there to hold their hands through it.

--

Crash. 

Steve can hear the ticking of the bike wheel, the sound of muffled shouts. He squeezes his eyes shut against the sudden burning on his knee. There’s red on his knee, it looks like his marker spilled. 

He blinks, and before he can do anything, there’s arms around him. He smells his mother’s floral perfume and cuddles into her. He’s not crying fully, but small tears seep down his cheeks.

“Stevie, are you okay? Are you hurt?”

Steve uses one small hand to wipe his eye. “M-my knee.”

“Let’s get you cleaned up,” his mom says and carries him inside. Steve watches as the world passes from his mother’s arms. The green of the yard, the white door swinging closed and slamming just as they start up the stairs. Steve watches the carpet of the stairs grow as his mom climbs them, and he shuts his eyes.

The white tile of the bathroom greets him when he opens them. He’s sitting on the counter; he can see himself in the bathroom mirror. His mom comes back carrying a bottle and band-aids. He recognizes the bottle from when he fell down the stairs and hit his head. “Owwie juice,” he whispers. 

His mom nods. “These need some owwie juice, okay, Stevie?  But it’ll be okay. You can squeeze my hand if it hurts too much, okay?” 

She offers her hand and Steve holds it tight, already preparing.

And when his mom pours the cold alcohol over his knee, he squeezes her hand for all its worth. 

---------------

Thwhump-thunk.

Eddie feels heat and the grainy ground in front of the trailer. The sky is blue above him, the sun is in his eyes, and he feels something burning up his leg and shoulder. A small sob coughs out of him and in seconds, his uncle’s face is above him.

“Eddie? Geez, kid, you okay?”

“U-Uncle W-Wayne?”

“Woah, woah, don’t move, I gotta make sure your head’s okay.”

Eddie whimpers as he feels his uncle’s rough fingers on his forehead before feeling his ears and then and behind his ears and neck. 

“You fell down the steps, son. I wanna make sure you’re okay.” 

“Owwie on my arm,” he tells him as another sob cries out. 

“Ah, I see it. Must hurt.”

Eddie cries as he nods. His knee looks scribbled with red and his elbow looks the same.

“I’ve got you, kid. “C’mon, we’ll get ya cleaned up.”

Eddie can feel the ground fall away as his uncle picks him up.

“It’ll be okay, y’know? I’ve fallen down these stairs a few times myself.”

Eddie watches the door to the trailer slam shut as they enter the familiar home, and then watches how the room swings and he watches the couch get farther away as they head past the kitchen and into the bathroom.

“You have?” he asks curiously, hiccupping over cries. His uncle places him on the seat of the toilet. “But y-you’re big.”

“Doesn’t mean I can’t trip just like you,” his uncle says, reaching under the sink and emerges with a bottle and Band-Aids. “But these owwies need some alcohol, okay?”

Eddie whimpers.

“This won’t be a walk in the park,” his uncle continues, already dabbing the clear liquid on a piece of gauze.  “But I’m right here. And you can squeeze my hand if it hurts too much,” he says, offering his free hand.

Eddie pouts but nods and when his uncle dabs the gauze against his small, scribbled knee, Eddie squeezes his hand for all its worth. 

[risingsunresistance]

i'd heard about the new minecart mechanics and people launching themselves off ramps, but i wanted to see how practical it was for travel. used buttons so that the rails would go back to their off positions after i used them... but hitting the button is really hard once you get going kjhfkg

behold: the multidirectional centrifuge

[inkskinned]

actually sometimes being neurodivergent is great bc you have a particular kind of Silly Mode that just . manifests glory. harmless fun is my precious side quest & i have a high score in whimsy. like okay if i gotta be the first dork in the dance pit it's gonna be me and this random toddler and we're gonna avril-style rock ouuuuttt

[rrogueamendiares]

currently in jjk hell

[iero]

Life's no fun without a good scare!

THE NIGHTMARE BEFORE CHRISTMAS — Henry Selick (1993)

[royalarchivist]

Bad: I don’t think people understand the effect QSMP had on some of the streamers in terms of like… The real raw mental impact, so I’m gonna set the stage for you. [...] Imagine that you were given a friend to play Minecraft with — like your best friend — BUT if this person dies, if they die in the game, you never get to talk to them again. Can you imagine what that’s like?

Bad: If you did not live through the QSMP, if you did not live through that, it almost sounds like, crazy. But I don’t think people realize how much of a joyous experience the Eggs were. They were SO awesome! They were literally so awesome to just hang out with and spend time with.

Bad: I’m not saying I regret it. To this day, I loved the experience. I’d do it all over again in a heartbeat. Even knowing how everything went, I would still do it all over again. [...] I would still do it all over again, because — even knowing like, all the trauma and suffering and stuff like that — because it was just… It was just that fun, it was just that fun.

Earlier today during his stream, Bad shared his experience and thoughts about the Eggs and the significant emotional (and traumatic) impact they had on him and his fellow QSMP members.

This clip a very edited-down version since his commentary was ~13 minutes long, so I highly recommend checking out Bad's VOD if you have the time. (Timestamp: 47:36 - 1:00:14)

[ Full Transcript ↓ ]

———

Bad: To be fair Chat, I really think the QSMP... I don't think anyone really can relate to it, Chat. It's something that's so... I've told people this before, like– but it's hard to understand. Right? Like...

Where was I? Sorry Chat, I'm losing my train of thought. Look, let me explain Chat– here's the dealio, ok? Here's the dealio, and this is what I mean when I say like, it's important to keep this in mind, Chat. Ok? It's important to keep this in mind:

I don’t think people understand the effect that the QSMP had on like, some of the streamers, in terms of like… The real raw mental impact, so I’m gonna set the stage for you. This is the analogy I’ve given to every person who I’ve like, shared this with. Imagine you meet somebody– [He hears a strange noise] What the fudge was that? Did you hear that?

Anyway– Chip! The story I was just relaying to Chat, Chip, was this: I was sharing this story with them, I said–  I was giving them an analogy. 

Imagine Chat, for example, imagine that you were… playing Minecraft, with like– you were given a friend to play Minecraft with, Chat, like your best friend, and [unintelligible] were like, “Hey, you get to play Minecraft with this person, right? BUT if this person dies – they’re currently your best friend, Chip – but if they die in the game, you never get to talk to them again. Ever again.” Can you imagine what that’s like, Chip?

I don’t think a lot of people understand like, what that does, right? I’m not gonna say that like, it creates this situation, Chip, that like, messes with your head, but it– Chip – but it totally, totally does, Chip. It messes with your head! It literally puts you in a position where you’re second-guessing and thinking about everything, Chip! You’re thinking about EVERYTHING Chip! Ok? And that’s the problem, Chip– is you turn into a paranoid monster because of it, Chip! Like, you don’t understand Chip– I was- I was so afraid of every dirt block, I used to carry a shovel with me Chip, and I would specifically right-click dirt blocks that looked suspicious because mines, Chip– mines could not be shoveled! Like, I was crazy, Chip! But here’s the problem, Chip: that craziness is still there. I’m genuinely like–

I remember thinking Chip, that I would one day– I was like, “I’m going to move past–” here, let’s go up here, Chip. I remember thinking one day Chip, I was like, “I’m gonna move past the underground base, one of these days. You know, one of these days, I feel like I’ll be able to grow and achieve the desire to build a base that doesn’t have to be underground.” But I don’t think it’s possible now Chip, because I think… I just don’t know. I feel like the paranoia– there’s still like, residual leftover trauma from that situation, Chip.

But here’s the problem Chip: I don’t think I don’t think– I don’t think people understand it. Like, I just really don’t. But I also don’t blame them Chip, ‘cuz I don’t think it’s possible to fully understand it if you haven’t lived through it. Like, if you did not live through the QSMP… I’m talking about the QSMP, I don’t- I don’t know if that was obvious– if you did not live through that, it almost sounds like, crazy. But I don’t think people realize how much of a joyous experience like, the Eggs were. Right? I don’t think people realize it. Like, they were SO awesome! They were literally so awesome to just hang out with and spend time with, Chip. So, it’s just one of those things that–

[He’s interrupted by a loud rumble of thunder above them]

Did lightning just strike here? Is it thunderstorming out…? But anyway, Chip. That’s the food for thought.

But that’s the problem– Like, every time it rains in Minecraft, I have to like, look at the sky, and I get this weird, like, second--hand vibe because of the trauma. The trauma, Chip! The trauma is real! But that’s the point– I’m not saying I regret it. I, to this day Chip, I loved the experience. I’d do it all over again in a heartbeat. Even knowing how everything went, I would still do it all over again. 

[He falls down] Dangit, don’t come over here Chip, ‘cuz I’m coming back up! Ok.

I would still do it all over again, because — even knowing like, all the trauma and suffering  and stuff like that — because it was just… It was just that fun, Chip, it was just that fun. I really wi– I don’t think it’s ever gonna be possible, Chip, to give people that same energy, like that same experience. You know what I mean, Chip? I don’t think it’s ever gonna be possible again. Like, EVER.

Because… because like, one: I will say on one level Chip, I will say on one level, like– it’s sort of emotionally like… It’s emotionally devastating, and I think to actually go through that– and this is where like, if I ever do end up going to a– see a therapist, if I ever do end up going to see a therapist at any point, I’ll talk it over with them and be like, “Hey, what do you think about this?” Because I genuinely think on one level, like– it’s created this fear of forming attachments because of like, how things can go. You know what I mean? Like, the fear of getting attached to something and then potentially losing it. Like, it’s- it’s a genuine thing. I think people forget about that.

Like, at the end of the day, everything was RP, right? On the server. You know what I mean? Like, everything was RP, Chip. BUT at the same point, even though it was RP Chip, it was still like– there the reality of you were still playing like, with another person, and you were still getting that experience, and it felt like you were genuinely attached to someone and you didn’t want anything bad to happen to them. It was GENUINELY stressful, Chip.

But at the same point, I don’t regret it, and I don’t think it was a bad experience. I’m– 

Sometimes in life Chip, you go through stuff, and maybe you have a certain amount of like, things that like, can happen, that you’re like, “You know what, maybe this wasn’t a good thing that this happened,” but at the same point, you still aren’t necessarily upset about it, because… it’s like growing as a person, right? Here’s the thing Chip; even bad situations, Chip, can lead to an overall good outcome. Like–

Even if you’re going through something bad Chip, just because a bad thing happens doesn’t mean that only bad things have to come from that. That’s one of the things I tell people all the time, Chip, is that if you go through a bad situation, you can learn from it, and you can use your experience to help others. And you can be that– you can be, at the worst-case scenario, you can be someone for other people who are going through that same experience to lean on when they go through that.I think there’s a certain amount of comfort that comes from that; from knowing no matter how bad your situation is, you’re not the only person who’s experienced it. You know what I mean?

[petermustdie]

gay and british life couldn't get worse for this man

inspired by this post by @poophorse

[benevolenterrancy]

("Always. Continuously. With increasing apprehension, and decreasing hope. I will love you if I never see you again, and I will love you if I see you every Tuesday. I will love you as a corpse loves the beak of the vulture. I will love you no matter what happens to you, and no matter how I discover what happens to you, and no matter what happens to me as I discover this." -- paraphrased from The Beatrice Letters, Lemony Snicket)

[pangur-and-grim]

the classical art pins are up for pre-order! greerstothers.shop

The Hunt of the Unicorn / Unknown artist The Garden of Death / Hugo Simberg Le génie du mal / Guillaume Geefs

[songthursh]

Our first collab comic with @stupidlynx!!! Some steppe romantic x)

[evgar]

they'll be kissing once they stop being chased don't worry!

[kor0kke]

Do you wanna hang with me? Call me! ☎️🌈💖

On a mini Nene era, I've seen tons of Nay-Nay Fanarts so I wanted to join too!! <3

Inspired by anime magazine covers :]

[shyalia]

The Portal Duo!

I've been on a Rise re-watch recently and felt inspired to draw something to show my appreciation. I've never drawn any of the Rise crew before because I thought they were intimidating, but they're actually a lot of fun to work with! Decided that the Portal Duo would be my first attempt (with Portal being one of my favourite games, and them being one of my favourite pairings in the show, it felt fitting to me).

[jade-of-mourning]

i miss them

[onethousxndvoices]

"You've grown up so much, you know that?"

[unhelpfultarot]

Hi, hello. I’m a long-time follower, first-time asker. I remember you saying you don’t really believe that divination works? I don’t know if that is still the case but, anyway, I respect it and just want to say that you, your efforts and time dedicated to this page are all valued here. The fact is you reach and help lots of people, not even just in (I’m assuming) your country. And it’s absolutely understandable if you need to take a break. But it’s also ok to change the “vibe” of the posts for however long. Yes, it is a funny page, and everyone appreciates that — but we’re all grieving and you can grieve here too. I hope this makes sense, I just woke up. Take care <3

My thinking is that there's nothing magical or supernatural about Tarot cards; they're just pictures on little pieces of paper. What they are is strong archetypal symbols, universal enough to apply to everybody, broad and general enough to have many possible meanings. Putting them together in combinations can spark ideas about all sorts of familiar situations. And human beings are very good at pattern recognition and storytelling, so when you put all that together, you can make connections that you otherwise might not think of. Or maybe acknowledge something that's been on your mind but you've been trying not to think about.

Or you can write silly descriptions of the normal ups and down of life, and then lots of people say "Whoa, that happened to you? That happened to me, too!" And then we all feel a little less alone.

I'm sure I will be back to posting, probably fairly soon. I'm unusually busy with some offline stuff lately (mostly positive, but time-consuming) but I miss being able to sit down quietly and shuffle my cards every day. And I miss feeling like I'm connected to my vast and faceless crowd of readers. I'm very fond of all of you out there, and hope you're doing well.

❤️