#the monkey movie
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thepastelhobbit · 3 days ago
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Inspired by @zombiepuke's post
i HAD to rush and doodle this since i thought it was so funny 🤭
also,,,!! bonus alternate version ❣️
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docileroamer · 1 month ago
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4 likes to make this.....
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mametzwood · 10 days ago
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everybody dies
and that's fucked up
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itsaaudraw · 20 days ago
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the monkey monday
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terryxsi · 1 month ago
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Adam scotts five min scene carried the monkey I just cant prove it
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jks1uv · 29 days ago
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𝐴 𝑅𝑎𝑡ℎ𝑒𝑟 𝐼𝑛𝑡𝑒𝑟𝑒𝑠𝑡𝑖𝑛𝑔 𝐹𝑎𝑚𝑖𝑙𝑦 𝐵𝑜𝑛𝑑𝑖𝑛𝑔 𝐸𝑥𝑝𝑒𝑟𝑖𝑒𝑛𝑐𝑒 ; hal shelburn | one-shot |
summary: hal shelburn is unsure about a lot of things but there’s one thing he’s absolutely sure about; that evil fucking monkey is going down.
pairing: fem!reader x hal shelburn.
trope: devoted man protects his family from evil + exes-ish to lovers.
genre: hurt / comfort + rekindling romance.
warnings‼️: crude language + mentions of violence + a kiss scene +
word count: 1,567.
random disclaimerrr: went to go see The Monkey (2025) yesterday & did i fr write this just bc i wanted to see him be a loyal family man bc i think that’s what he’d thrive for when he got older? yes. yes i did. i was like “proper name, place name, backstory stuff 🫦” the whole movie cuz he’s just so handsome. theo james is so fine y’allll!! 😝🤭 changed the kids name to ‘peter’ bc why not & its still paying homage to his grandfather. happy reading! ʕ•ᴥ•ʔ ♡ © 2025 @jks1uv
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Hal has always kept to himself, obviously until you.
You caught him by surprise, charmed him in a way that was irresistible.
He found himself stuttering to ask you out. That soon led to his attempts at romance to which you accepted his advances.
Soon, you were married, and it was the happiest day of his life. You were ecstatic but for Hal, it was perhaps the one day where he’d felt true, unfiltered joy.
Of course, nothing lasts forever and he berated himself for forgetting that.
After you were pregnant, he felt an ominous sensation in his stomach. He understood that feeling to be reality settling in when you passed your first trimester.
Your pregnancy was hard but despite Hal’s internal tug-of-war between his heart and mind, he chose you.
Peter was born and Hal held the world in his hands, and he realized the heavy weight it carried.
Hal remembers his father and the curse Bill and he had to endure for a short amount of time. The pain brought on in that short amount of time was enough to be generational.
The last thing Hal wanted to subject his son, his beautiful little family to was generational trauma.
And so, he made like eggs and scrambled. He became distant, cold, mysterious.
You couldn’t recognize this shell of the man you married.
You signed the divorce papers against your hearts will but Hal never did possess the bravery to bring his signature to life onto those papers.
He was more than happy being estranged, because he was still your husband.
Making a deal to see his son and wife once a year wasn’t his best idea but it was his only way of making sure no harm comes to either of you.
Unfortunately, this time around happened to be unlucky. These past few days have been hell.
Your estranged husband rented a motel room to spend the night before continuing the trip he had planned for you and your son. He goes outside to talk to someone on the phone when he sees someone explode by diving into an electrified motel pool.
Hal then abruptly woke you and your son, Peter, to spend the rest of the night at another motel.
Not too long after, a realtor was instantly blown to pieces by a loaded shotgun that was conveniently placed to open fire on whoever would open the closet door. R.I.P. Barbara.
You weren’t oblivious; you picked up on Hal’s body language and facial expressions as soon as he explained what happened to the cops.
His desperation to leave and spend time with you and Peter wasn’t exactly helping his case, either.
Your son was showering which gave you the perfect opportunity to confront your estranged husband.
“I just want you to stop fucking with me.”
He’s heard that tone before but he didn’t tell you then and he won’t tell you now.
Hal sighs, “I already told you, there’s some kind of- a, uh… a curse on my family-”
You roll your eyes. “Oh, bull-fuckin’-shit. Why’d you marry me if you were so cursed?!”
You’ve never done that before.
He turns and looks at you and you see. You see the guilt in his eyes, like he’s sorry he married you. Not in a condescending way, never that; but in a way that is regrettable.
He truly believes he fucked up your life.
He doesn’t say anything for a couple of moments.
You hear the shower running and the bathroom fan on.
He looks away from you, sniffs and clears his throat to hide his embarrassment.
You’ve made him uncomfortable and part of you is satisfied seeing him scramble (pun intended) to give some sort of explanation. Another part of you is regretful.
Why should your satisfaction lie in upsetting him?
The better part of you takes charge. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to… for it to come out that way.”
He shakes his head. “No, no, it’s alright. I know you didn’t mean it like that.”
He’s sensitive, you know that. You also know he’s hurt but for some reason, he keeps shutting you out.
You stand from the bed and walk to him.
“Don’t shut me out, Hal.” You plead softly.
He stares into your eyes and he’s taken back to when he saw you for the first time. He’s reminded of the strange wave of confidence that washed against the shore of his heart.
Maybe the fear of losing you gnawed at his soul when you walked into his life but he became delusional.
You made him delusional.
You made him think differently, the familiar sound of bell tolls vanished from his mind when he married you. The only sound a bell made to him was that of the chime of wedding bells.
He turned a complete 180 from where he used to be and it’s all because of you.
“I married you because I love you.” He admits.
It’s like a breath of fresh air when he says that, probably because you haven’t heard that from him in a long time.
You’ve been desperate to see him for longer than a weekend but he just wouldn’t allow it. You’ve been craving his touch, his smile. Him, all of him.
“Please, just let me in.” You beg.
Your eyes tear up on their own accord and it breaks his heart.
His resolve is dissolving at the second and he’s afraid you’ll turn him into that lovesick fool he allowed himself to be.
But if he’s being completely honest with himself, his love for you never went away.
Hal cradles your face in his hands like it’s as fragile as glass. His thumbs wipe the tears and softly caress your cheekbones.
“I never lied to you, Y/n.” He murmurs.
“My dad… found this monkey and he brought it home for Bill and I.”
You look back and forth between his eyes and it doesn’t take a genius to know he’s telling the truth.
“Long story short, the monkey is evil. It has a key in the back and if you turn it, it’ll kill someone- whoever it chooses.”
“So, a toy monkey is responsible for dooming our marriage and plaguing you with crippling anxiety.”
It’s a fucked up situation to be in but you still manage to make it sound a bit humorous. He cracks a small smile at your summary.
“All but one thing: it’s not a toy, don’t call it that.”
“Right, sorry. I won’t call it a toy.” You blink, amused.
He deeply sighs. “I’m serious, Y/n. It comes with an attached drum set and once the drumstick comes down…” He trails off hoping you’d get it.
“It plays the drum signaling someone’s gonna die?”
“Yes.”
“It’s like Jumanji.”
“Yeah, sure. Whatever works best for you.”
He holds your shoulders and brings his face closer to you.
“Which is why I’ve kept you and Petey away from me for so long. I couldn’t risk anything, I-I couldn’t risk you two.”
His big, brown, glassy eyes beg you for forgiveness silently.
“You could’ve told me.” You slowly reach for his hands and put them down.
“All this time, Hal. All this time, I thought you just didn’t want us anymore-”
He’s offended. “That’s not true-”
You scoff dryly. “And how the fuck was I supposed to know? You just distanced yourself from us and wouldn’t even give me an explanation!”
“I know, I know. But-” He shakily inhales as he can’t hold his tears anymore. “Everything I did, I did it for you and him. Just for you two.”
He sniffles and it makes you want to cry.
“Bill and I threw it down the well but I knew it wouldn’t stay down there forever. I-I fell in love with you and-and it was selfish,”
Hal comes close to you once again, proving how badly he wants nothing but to let you in again.
“But fuck it, I wanted to be selfish just once. Just this once.”
He hesitantly touches your arm.
“And I’m sorry for ruining your life-”
If your heart was broken before, it’s fucking squeezing with pain now.
“Hal, don’t say that.”
It’s your turn to wipe his tears. His lashes are wet and his nose is tinged a light red.
“You didn’t ruin my life.” You promise. “You upset me and it was poor communication on your part, but you never ruined it.”
He doesn’t look at you when he nods, still feeling doubtful.
You don’t think about it, and like it’s basic instinct; you tilt his chin up and kiss him.
You just press your lips against his to test the waters but when he pulls back and looks into your eyes, he slowly pulls you in. He kisses you softly, slowly. He’s kissing you and it’s real.
He’s making up for all the times he should’ve been kissing you, for all the years he’s lost by not telling you the truth.
He’s tired of letting his fear hold him back. He’s fed up with that stupid fucking monkey holding him prisoner in a nonexistent cell.
It’s been far too long and he’d be damned if he’d let you slip away again.
Hal’s going to bring an end to this curse once and for all, but for right now; he’s going to kiss you, hold you and never leave your side.
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stenclastiel · 29 days ago
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The monkey needs to grow to human size and rail the everloving shit out of Bill because that motherfucker was so obsessed with the monkey he even fantasized it stripping for him in a club
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b3jewe1ed · 13 days ago
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the discourse about the monkey movie is irritating me SO much. literally just read a comment that said “it was so bad, idk if it was meant to be a comedy or horror” IT WAS MEANT TO BE BOTH!!!!!!! COMEDY HORROR IS A REAL GENRE!!!!!!!!!! YOU SHOULD WATCH MORE MOVIES FROM IT BECAUSE THEY’RE ALWAYS GREAT FUN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
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hungry-skeleton · 1 month ago
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I'm so excited to watch the fucking monkey next week
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misstwisted · 13 days ago
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New meme drop after finishing the highly anticipated “the monkey” movie just an hour ago. I already miss it…
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fuckyeahelijahwoodfan · 8 months ago
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Elijah wood Theo james on the set of The Monkey coming next year 🙌 👀
From theo james updated on X
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ajthecinephile · 2 months ago
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Neon sent me to an early screening of The Monkey last night! Full review to come. Follow my Letterboxd: ajthecinephile.
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luvvzria · 9 days ago
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Hear me out on teen Bill Shelburn 🫢
HEAR ME OUTT HE'S KINDA.. WAIT NO HE'S REALLY FINE 🤭
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strangererotica · 21 days ago
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I need Theo James to rip me in half, starting at either end.
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terryxsi · 1 month ago
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The monkey never killed Hal because he’s different, one could even say…divergent
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atoadinahole · 1 month ago
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Billy you are a profound freak to me
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