#the last of course are my dissertation essay notes from today

[isbergillustration]

A few doodles that did not quite stand on their own

[sunder-soul]

As requested, a Part II to the prompt from @riddles-wifey​​ about jealous Tom!

PART I HERE! 💖

･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ.

Jealousy

Summary: Reader tries to avoid Tom following their strange confrontation, fails miserable, a very different kind of confrontation ensues.

Word count: 1.5k Content warning: making out, nothing too serious.

･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ.

“Something weird happened,” you say bluntly, falling into the seat next to Margot in Transfiguration the next morning.

She immediately looks up from her textbook.

“With Riddle,” you add quietly, glancing around the classroom to check for onlookers and potential eavesdroppers.

Margot’s brows shoot up and a wide grin splits her face. “Are you serious?” she whispers excitedly, leaning in.

“Yeah,” you mutter, pulling out your Transfiguration textbook and some parchment. “I think he thought that me and Varrowe were dating…”

“And?” Margot says immediately, so focused on you that she doesn’t notice Dumbledore stride into the room (which is rather impressive considering he’s dressed in vibrant lime green robes with glittering gold fastenings.)

“He got all mad last night when he saw us together, but then when I told him that I was Varrowe’s tutor, he��” You trail off, twirling your quill in your fingers, very unsure how to even describe what had happened.

“Yes?” Margot prompts, still grinning.

“He got all up close and… intense,” you mumble with a wave of your hand, feeling your cheeks grow warm.

Margot looks delighted. “And?”

“And nothing,” you shrug, dejectedly writing the date at the top of your parchment. “After that he just… left.”

“Sweet Snidgets above,” Margot says, shaking her head with a wry smile on her face. “You snagged Riddle.”

“I haven’t snagged anyone!” you whisper hastily, glancing around again. “And keep your voice down!”

“I’m so proud of you,” she says theatrically, completely ignoring your panic. “Merlin’s beard, wait until poor Olive Hornby finds out, she’s been planning their wedding since first year –”

“She’s not going to find out anything,” you say pointedly, narrowing your eyes, “because there’s nothing to find out!”

“Sure, sure,” Margot winks, “so what are you going to do?”

“Dunno,” you mutter, “I guess just avoid him for the rest of time.”

“Avoid him?” she repeats, looking scandalised. “Are you completely stupid? Why would you –”

“My deepest apologies, Miss Droope,” Dumbledore calls from the front of the room, making the both of you jump and wheel around in your seats as the entire class turns to look at you. “I’m afraid I must interrupt your conversation with the minor inconvenience of today’s lesson,” he continues with a sparkle in his eye. “Perhaps you two might find a time outside of class to continue your discussion.”

“Sorry Professor,” you both mutter, hastily bending over your notes.

Dumbledore resumes the class, but the side-eye grin that Margot shoots you assures you that you are most definitely not off the hook yet.

･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ.

Your plan to avoid Riddle works right up until the exact moment that it doesn’t.

It’s a rainy Monday night about a week after the strange conversation with Riddle and you’re holed up in the library with the most gruelling History of Magic assignment you’ve ever had – a sixty inch dissertation on the contributing factors of the Giant Wars.

You throw your quill down and sigh, staring up at the droplets trickling down the dark window and listening to the relentless thrum of the rain. Your eyes are aching and your brain feels like fuzz – it’s definitely time for a break.

You get up and wander down the nearby shelves, vaguely searching for a particular text and fully intending on taking as long as possible to find it, when just like that you round the corner and see Riddle standing in the middle of the aisle.

You freeze.

He hasn’t seen you yet, peering attentively at a text open in one hand as the other traces down its table of contents. You take a slow step back, and right as you think you might get away without drawing his attention, his head swivels around and his eyes flash to yours.

There’s a very loaded pause in which you must look a lot like a deer caught in headlights.

“Evening,” Riddle says smoothly, snapping his book shut with one hand and sliding it back onto the shelf.

“Hi,” you say awkwardly.

“I haven’t seen you around very much lately,” Riddle says casually, leaning against the bookshelf beside him.

“I’ve been busy,” you mutter, avoiding his even gaze as you scan the shelves for the book you’re looking for.

“Oh I’m sure,” he says softly.

You grit your teeth and squint at the books in front of you, determined to ignore him.

“What are you looking for?” Riddle asks.

“Modern Gigantomachy,” you say reluctantly.

“Which edition?”

You glance around at him. He’s still leaning against the bookshelf, looking annoyingly attractive, the waves of his black hair contrasting with his skin, the fine angles of his brows above his dark eyes, the knowing curl on his lips as he watches you –

“Fourth,” you say quickly before you can get too distracted.

Riddle pushes off the bookshelf and is suddenly mere inches in front of you. Your heart immediately lurches as you take an instinctive step away and your back hits the shelf behind you. Riddle delicately arches a brow at your reaction, his eyes fixed on yours as he slowly reaches up to a shelf far above you and slides a book off of it. He hands it to you and you take it automatically.

“Thanks,” you breathe, staring at him wide-eyed.

“Of course,” Riddle says softly.

There’s another silence. Neither of you have moved an inch, and you begin to wonder exactly how many times you’re going to end a hair’s breadth away Riddle before one of you finally caves –

“You’ve been avoiding me,” he murmurs, a smirk building on his lips.

Your heart stops for a second. “You were jealous of Varrowe,” you blurt out.

Riddle’s smirk falls. He lifts a hand to rest on the shelf above your head, leaning over you very unnervingly. “Jealous?” he repeats sharply

“Yeah,” you breathe, slightly horrified that you’d actually said it out loud. “You were.”

Something works in Riddle’s jaw as he glares down at you, and you hug the book he gave you closer to your chest.

“And why would I be jealous of Varrowe?” he whispers.

You blink at him. Riddle is close, too close, his eyes raking across your face as he looms over you, something almost possessive about his hand above your head. There’s no mistaking the sudden shift in the air between you.

You’re leaning up onto the balls of your feet without thinking twice.

Your lips brush against his, so softly that the kiss is barely there, but enough to send your heart hammering as you pull back just far enough to check his reaction. Your cheeks are aflame and your lips are tingling, unable to believe what you’ve just done as the silence stretches on and on, as Riddle stares back at you, frozen in place with something you can’t recognise burning in his dark eyes.

The faintest frown appears between Riddle’s brow, and then slowly, very slowly, he’s leaning down towards you. Your breath hitches. His lips meet yours at the exact same moment that he steps in closer, crowding you back against the shelf, soft and warm, kissing you with a smooth, relentless pressure and you’re leaning up into it without even realising what you’re doing, thoughts swirling, heat on your skin, stomach twisting –

Riddle is pulling the book from your hands and carelessly dropping it to the floor, taking you by the waist and lifting you up as he steps in again, pinning you to against the bookshelf without breaking the kiss. Your hands card into the soft waves of his hair and his grip on your waist tightens as you wrap your legs around him. The first touch of his tongue makes you gasp against his lips, and Riddle’s fingers immediately tangle in your hair to pull you harder against him. Riddle’s mouth is moving against yours, hungry and unyielding, and you’re getting dizzy as heat curls in your stomach –

He pulls away very suddenly. You stare at him in surprise, breathing hard. Riddle’s lips are slick and his eyes have gone black, one of his hands still buried in your hair and the other gripping your hip so tightly that you’re sure that you’ll have bruises in the pattern of his fingers tomorrow.

“We are in the middle of the library,” he murmurs against your lips. It takes a lot to resist shivering at the sound of his voice.

“We… could… go somewhere else…” you manage to say, your heart racing so hard that he can surely hear it.

A small smirk builds on his face. “What about your essay?” he says smoothly, so close that your lips start aching to close the scant distance between you –

“I think technically I just had my textbook confiscated by a prefect,” you whisper with a flicker of a smile, “so there’s my alibi.”

Riddle breathes a laugh, and then his lips are on yours once more.

Thanks for asking for a sequel @bluehydrangea-cherry​ and @the-almond-dinger 💖

[calumcest]

i want to teach you a lesson (in the worst kind of way)

me writing 5.6k in 4 hours and pretending my essays/presentation/exams/dissertation don’t exist? it’s more likely than you think

thank u jex for listening to me scream abt this for the past 4 hours and for always being the sweetest and most encouraging person in the world you are truly such a positive influence in my life 

also this is based off a prompt i got i think in 2014 never say i don’t provide! i would link the post but honestly it’s just got my 16 year old self’s embarrassing screams on it so frankly i would rather not so instead i will provide you with a screenshot of the ask under the cut 

[ao3]

-

“Who’s that, sir?” Lily asks, jabbing at the window.

“The new PE teacher,” Michael says.

“He’s cute,” Sarah says, and a couple of the girls nod vigorously.

“He’s also twice your age,” Michael says. “Go on, off to your practice rooms.” The girls groan, but one by one pull themselves away from the window and start to wander off. Michael stays by the window, one eye on the girls to make sure they actually go where they’re supposed to and one eye on the new PE teacher, who’s dividing the class up into groups and handing out footballs. He is kind of hot, Michael supposes, if you’re into muscular guys who are clearly good at sports. Which Michael most definitely is.

-

Michael Clifford loves his job. 

Sure, the staff room politics can get a bit exhausting (although Michael would be lying if he didn’t admit to loving all the drama he wasn’t personally involved in), and the kids can drive him up the fucking wall, but at the end of the day, there’s nothing he’d rather be doing than teaching. 

Except today. Today, when a good portion of 10C has somehow exploded into an argument over whether or not Julia snatched a guitar when Sam was about to take it, he thinks he’d rather be a human guinea pig for infectious diseases, or something. It probably pays better, anyway.

“Sam,” he says sternly, and he turns to look at Michael, anger written all over his face. “There are plenty of guitars in the cupboard. Let Julia have that one.”

“But sir, that’s the only one which-” 

“I don’t care,” Michael says, holding up a hand, because he’s perfectly aware that it’s the only guitar which stays in tune longer than thirty seconds. He’s been begging for a budget increase since the day he joined the school. “It’s one lesson, it’s not an exam, you can deal with it for forty-five minutes.” 

“But Mr Clifford-” Lucy pipes up, ready to defend Sam. 

“No, Lucy,” he says firmly. “I want all of you in the practice rooms, now.” Sam glares at him furiously and stomps off without an instrument in his hands, Lucy and Pip running behind him to one of the practice rooms outside the main classroom. Michael decides he’s got enough on his plate without inserting himself into hormonally-charged teenage drama, so he lets them go, rounding on Noel and Olivia, who are still arguing with Julia, Brandon hovering awkwardly nearby. 

“I don’t want to hear anything else about this,” Michael cuts in, and Noel and Olivia round on Michael instead. 

“Sir, she stole it from-”

“He was about to pick it u-”

“I don’t want to spend my lunchtime in detention, and unless you two do I suggest you get your instruments and go to your practice rooms,” Michael says curtly, trying to refrain from pinching the bridge of his nose in annoyance. He’s getting a stress-induced headache already, and it’s the first lesson of the day. 

“Fine,” Olivia spits, full of the kind of melodrama only a fifteen-year-old can summon, and Michael tries not to roll his eyes as they stalk off to one of the practice rooms at the back of the classroom without so much as another glance in his direction. He’s pretty sure he hears one of them mutter fuck you under their breath as they walk away, and he feels momentarily bad before he remembers they’ll have forgotten about it by their next lesson. 

“Don’t do it again,” is all he says tiredly to Julia, who nods meekly, and scampers off to join her group in one of the other practice rooms at the back of the classroom. That being sorted, Michael turns back to the rest of the class, to find about eight of the girls gathered at the window, chattering excitedly. 

“That doesn’t look like composing a short piece on three instruments to me,” he says, wandering over, and a bunch of the girls look back at him with a look of excitement on their faces. 

“Who’s that, sir?” Lily asks, jabbing at the window and leaving a mark. Michael peers over their heads to see a distant figure standing on the field with a class that looks like it might be 7A. All he can make out is that it’s a guy, with what looks like a mess of dark brown hair and a couple of tattoos on his (very muscular, Michael notes with approval) arms that he’s waving around, clearly explaining something. 

Michael vaguely remembers Paula, the headmistress, saying something about a new PE teacher starting this week, but he’d been too busy whisper-explaining to Luke why Magic: The Gathering was a great game and he should definitely play it with Michael to remember what she’d said the guy was called. 

“The new PE teacher,” he says, hoping they won’t ask what he’s called.

“He’s cute,” Sarah says, and a couple of the girls nod vigorously.

“He’s also twice your age,” Michael says. “Go on, off to your practice rooms.” The girls groan, but one by one pull themselves away from the window and start to wander off. Michael stays by the window, one eye on the girls to make sure they actually go where they’re supposed to and one eye on the new PE teacher, who’s dividing the class up into groups and handing out footballs. He is kind of hot, Michael supposes, if you’re into muscular guys who are clearly good at sports. Which Michael most definitely is. 

Huh, he thinks, pushing himself away from the window and heading to the first practice room to make sure Noel, Olivia and Brandon have calmed down a bit. Sarah’s kind of right. 

 ------- 

 Michael has a free period fourth period, and even if he usually wouldn’t be seen dead on the field, it’s a beautiful day, and it is on the route to the staff room. Well, it’s on a route to the staff room, at least, and if that route happens to be five minutes longer than simply walking through the building and over the quad, then Michael doesn’t need to know about it. He could do with the exercise, he tells himself. It’s nothing to do with the new PE teacher. 

When Michael gets down to the field, the PE teacher’s gathering up the footballs from the previous lesson and stuffing them in the big netted bag that’s been threatening to break for about five years. He turns around after picking up the last one and spots Michael (who is definitely not staring) cutting across the top part of the field. He raises a hand, and Michael’s not really sure if he’s waving or telling him to get the fuck off the field, but then he’s gathering the bag in one hand and jogging over, and Michael’s absolutely not watching the lines of his muscles as he makes his way over. 

“Hi!” the guy says, grinning widely, and fucking hell, he’s even hotter up close. He’s got dark brown eyes, crinkled at the corners with the brilliant smile currently gracing his full lips, and his dark hair is curled, falling into his face slightly. “I’m Calum. Calum Hood. I’m new.” 

“I’m Michael Clifford,” Michael says. “I’m not.” He curses inwardly as soon as the words have left his lips - he should be legally restricted from talking to hot guys, honestly - but Calum laughs, laughs, and it’s not fake, if the twinkle in his eyes is anything to go by. 

“I gathered,” he says. “So, what do you teach?” 

“Music,” Michael says. “You’re PE?” Calum nods. 

“Music’s my second, though,” he says. 

“Oh?” Michael wants to die. Of course hot PE guy can teach Music, of all things. He was literally crafted by God to upset Michael. 

“Yeah,” Calum says, with a smile. “I mean, I’m sure I’m nowhere near as good as you, but I play guitar, and a little piano. Bass is my real love, though.” 

“Bass?” Michael says, trying his best not to imagine Calum’s long fingers flying across a fretboard. 

“Yeah,” Calum says. “I played in a band, for a bit, but, y’know.” He gestures at himself. “Clearly didn’t work out.” 

“That’s pretty fucking cool, though,” Michael says, genuinely impressed. “And hey, bassist to secondary school PE teacher is an upgrade.” Calum laughs. 

“Fuck you, man,” he says, but he’s grinning, and Michael feels a warmth spreading from his toes to his cheeks. “Hey, are you heading to the staff room?” Michael nods. “Mind if I tag along? I’m still finding my way around.” 

“Sure,” Michael says, shrugging and hoping it conceals the fact that he kind of wants to turn back to the safety of his music room and bang his head on the wall until he forgets someone as perfect as Calum Hood exists on the same planet as him. 

“Sweet,” Calum says, beaming at him as he holds up the bag of footballs. “Let me just lock these in the shed and I’ll be right with you.” 

Yeah, sweet, Michael thinks, as Calum turns on his heel and jogs away from Michael over to the tiny shed in the corner of the field which houses all the outdoor equipment. Not like Michael’s already head over heels in love, or anything. 

Sweet. 

 ------- 

 Calum’s officially introduced in the staff room at lunchtime on his first day, but Michael has lunch duty on a Monday so he misses it. Luke and Ashton tell him Calum’s a big hit in the staff room, “really charming, and have you seen his arms?”, which just puts Michael in a bad mood, because he now has competition. 

It’s three days before Michael bumps into Calum again, in his free second period, which he’s spending catching up on all the marking that was due, like, two weeks ago and is still unfinished. 

“Hey, Michael!” Calum says cheerfully, sitting down opposite Michael at the desk that he’s entirely covered with a careful class-organised system of marking. “Oh, shit, are you busy?” 

“No,” Michael says immediately, because what’s his job compared to conversation with the hottest guy in Australia? “What’s up?” Calum shrugs. 

“Just wanted a chat,” he says. “Haven’t seen you in a few days. You been hiding from me?” His eyes are twinkling as he says it, and it makes Michael’s stomach flip, because it’s pretty friendly for a guy he’s met once. If Michael were anyone else, he would say Calum might almost be flirting. Maybe Calum’s just like that, though. Maybe it doesn’t mean anything. 

“Been catching up on marking,” Michael says, indicating all the papers on the desk. “I’m literally going to stop setting homework, I swear to God.” 

“Can’t say I relate,” Calum says, with a grin. “Perks of being a PE teacher.” 

“Yeah, but you have to deal with, like, concussions, and shit,” Michael says, capping his pen. 

“What doesn’t kill you makes you stronger, and all that,” Calum says breezily, and Michael snorts. 

“Typical PE teacher,” he says. “I could have had my leg cut off and my PE teacher would have made me keep running.” Calum smirks. 

“Well, you have another leg, don’t you?” he says, and laughs when Michael scowls. “I’m kidding. I’d let you do push ups instead.” Michael rolls his eyes, but he’s grinning. 

“How generous,” he says. Calum grins back at him, and Michael’s heart does a fucking backwards somersault, or something ridiculous. 

“That’s what you get for saying PE teacher is an upgrade from bassist,” he says. 

“Hey, that’s just the natural order of things,” Michael says. “It’s not my fault bass is at the bottom of the musical food chain.” 

“What’s music without the rhythm section?” Calum says, stretching, and Michael tries his best not to stare at the sliver of skin that’s exposed under his shirt. 

“Acoustic?” Michael offers, and Calum huffs out a laugh, bringing his arms (and shirt, Michael thinks wistfully) back down. 

“Fuck,” he says agreeably. “Guess my band could have carried on without me.” 

“What kind of music did you play?” Michael asks. Calum shrugs. 

“A bit of everything,” he says. “We started on All Time Low, Fall Out Boy, that kind of a thing, got more Radiohead and Tame Impala vibes as we went on.” Jesus Christ. Michael has literally died and gone to heaven, because there is absolutely no way a man this perfect exists anywhere other than in Michael’s imagination. 

“Mate, I fucking love All Time Low,” Michael says, and a smile unfurls on Calum’s lips. 

“Have you heard their new album?” 

“Yeah,” Michael says. “Fuck, Monsters? What a fucking tune.”

“Right?” Calum says enthusiastically. “And Basement Noise?” 

“Fucking sick,” Michael agrees. 

“You’ve got good taste,” Calum says approvingly. Michael opens his mouth to say something - you’re just saying that to get in my pants is on the tip of his tongue - but he’s interrupted (or possibly saved from eternal embarrassment) by Ashton sitting down heavily next to him. 

“Hey, Michael,” he says, throwing a dimpled smile in his direction. “Hey, Calum.”

“Hey, Ashton,” Calum says. “How’s the Year 10 clay project coming along?”

“Oh, you know,” Ashton says, leaning back in his seat and pushing his curls out of his face. “Two busts have been decapitated so far, so we’re doing pretty well, all things considered.” 

“Nice,” Michael says approvingly. 

“I know you’re talking about the decapitations, Mike, you don’t fool me,” Ashton says knowingly. Michael scowls. 

“Was it Sam?” he asks, needing to know who to high-five in his next lesson.

“No, Noel,” Ashton says. 

“10C? Short kid, really fucking fast?” Calum asks. Michael shrugs. How is Michael supposed to know how fast he is? It’s not like Noel’s Naruto running through the music room. 

“Yeah,” Ashton says, because apparently Noel’s Naruto running through the art room. 

“He’s really fucking good with a ball,” Calum says, and Michael bites back an awful innuendo with a lot of difficulty. Not in front of Ashton, he tells himself. 

“He’s lacking a passion,” Ashton says. “He’s good at art, but he messes around too much.” 

“Same with Music,” Michael says. “He’s got a temper on him, too.” 

“Well, maybe I can get him to channel it into football,” Calum says seriously. “Kids need an outlet, and something they feel like they’re good at. He needs something to be proud of.” 

Fuck, Michael thinks, as Ashton enthusiastically responds in kind, staring at Calum as he nods along to whatever Ashton’s saying with a thoughtful frown. He’s definitely in love. 

 ------- 

 Calum and Michael fall into a bit of a routine. 

They don’t share a lot of free periods together, only the fourth on Monday and second on Thursday, but Michael will wait at the corner of the field for Calum to finish clearing up after his last lesson and they’ll walk to the staff room together, sitting and chatting shit for an hour about nothing in particular. 

Michael learns that Calum’s got a sister, Mali, who’s in the music industry and whom he’s incredibly proud of, and that he’s half-Kiwi, half-Scottish, and grew up in western Sydney, not too far from Michael. He learns that Calum loves dogs more than he loves either bass or football, loves his dog (Duke) more than he loves anything else on the planet, likes playing Fifa and eating ice cream, and that his biggest fear is not having an impact on the world. He learns that Calum genuinely loves teaching, that Noel’s finding his feet with football and he’s really enjoying it, and that Calum almost went professional with football. 

(“Is there anything you aren’t fucking talented at?” Michael says grumpily, when Calum tells him that. Calum laughs. 

“Asking cute boys out,” he says, throwing Michael a grin, and Michael’s stomach flips.) 

And so he also learns that Calum’s gay, and that he’s been single his whole life. 

(“Are you serious? Michael says incredulously. Calum shrugs. 

“I’m not a blushing virgin, Michael,” he says, seeing the look on Michael’s face, and Michael scowls. 

“I didn’t say you were,” Michael says sullenly, but he’s secretly more than a little jealous of these nameless, faceless boys that have had the honour of fucking Calum Hood.) 

Of course, Michael’s not the only one in the school to notice Calum. 

A majority of the girls, and a good number of the boys, sing Calum’s praises to Michael every opportunity they get. He hears them talking in the corridors when Calum breezes past, smiling at them but eyes lighting up when he brushes past Michael (which Michael tries desperately not to think about when he’s staring out of the window daydreaming in the middle of a lesson). The staff are no better, either - Brenda and Caroline have been gossiping about Calum’s muscles so loudly that Michael only half-jokingly threatened to file a sexual harassment suit against them on his behalf. 

One thing that having an incredibly hot PE teacher has done wonders for, though, is school morale. 

It’s the only reason Michael’s standing at the corner of a wet field on a freezing May afternoon, wrapped in a thick coat and scarf and somehow still shivering, huddled between Luke and Ashton, whom he’d bribed-slash-threatened to join him because he didn’t want to be too obvious about it. 

(“Mike, I don’t think you could be less obvious about being in love with Calum if you tried,” Luke had said, rolling his eyes, but then Michael had pulled out his trump card - he’d give Luke his coveted spot in the corner of the staff room - and Luke had agreed to go.) 

“I fucking hate you,” Luke mumbles into the scarf currently covering a good half of his face. “I’m so fucking cold. This is not worth it to get you laid.”

“Fuck you,” Michael says automatically, eyes on Calum. He’s shouting encouragement and tactics at the Year 12 football team - not that Michael can hear it above the cheers and boos from the rest of the school and their opposition - but he looks so fucking good, brow creased as he focuses on the game. 

“Are there usually this many people at football games?” Ashton asks, looking around in wonder. “There aren’t, are there?”

“How d’you expect us to know?” Luke asks, exasperated. “We’re not usually at football games either.” 

“We’re being good friends,” Ashton tells Luke, a little sternly, and Luke huffs, but doesn’t say anything else. 

Their team scores, and the crowd erupts into cheers, because it’s now only two minutes until the end of the game and they’re two-one up, so it’s unlikely the result will change. Calum still looks determined, though, muttering something to Ben, the Year 12 captain, who nods and jogs back across the bitch to prepare for the kick-off. 

“I hate this,” Luke whines after a minute, because that’s apparently as long as he can keep quiet without reminding everyone how miserable he is. “This is why I’m a Maths teacher.” 

“Shut up,” Michael says, and then the final whistle blows and Calum’s face is finally relaxing, tension dissipating from his posture as he cheers with the rest of the crowd. 

“Calum looks really good tonight,” Ashton says, sending a glance in Michael’s direction.

“Alright, fuck me, I guess,” Luke grumbles. Ashton rolls his eyes. 

“You’re such a fucking bitch sometimes,” he says, but he looks around furtively before snaking his arm around Luke’s waist and giving it a quick squeeze. 

“Everyone knows you’re fucking,” Michael comments, still staring at Calum. “You don’t have to be sly about it.” 

“No they don’t,” Luke says, leaning into Ashton’s touch. 

“Yes, they do,” Michael says, and then he forgets what he was going to say next because Calum makes eye contact with him from across the pitch and gives him a huge grin, and Michael’s stomach bottoms out. “Fuck, he’s grinning at me.” 

“Well, grin back, idiot,” Ashton says, so Michael does. Calum holds his gaze for a moment, and then turns back to his team, leaving Michael feeling a little unsteady. 

“I’m in love,” he declares, for the nintieth time that week. 

“We know,” Luke says grumpily. 

 ------- 

 Michael’s halfway through marking 8A’s elements of music test when there’s a knock at the door. He looks up, expecting to see Luke or Ashton, not Calum. He looks out of place in his football kit in the music room, and Michael’s brain short-circuits as it tries to reconcile a hot man in Michael’s music room. 

“Hey,” he says, sticking his head around the door. “Am I disturbing you?”

“No,” Michael says, because Calum could walk in on him taking a shit and wouldn’t be disturbing him. “What’s up?” Calum steps into the room, clicking the door shut behind him, and throws himself down on a seat opposite Michael’s desk.

“So,” he says. “You know All Time Low are here next weekend?” Michael nods. He’s planning on going with Luke and Ashton. “I might have got two tickets to Sunday night.” 

“That’s sick,” Michael enthuses. “Who are you going with?” Calum throws Michael an odd look, somewhere between exasperation and amusement. 

“Well, I was hoping you’d want to come?” he says. Michael blinks. 

“Me?” he says. 

“Yeah,” Calum says, and there’s definitely a hint of amusement in his tone now. 

“I, uh.” Michael’s not really sure how to speak without saying yes, please, and please let me suck your dick while I’m at it. He swallows, hoping it’ll make the words disappear from the tip of his tongue. “I’d fucking love to.” Calum grins, looking relieved, and Michael realises that he must have been nervous . Something about that sends a thrill coursing through his veins - he’d made Calum nervous, somehow. 

“Sweet,” he says happily. “Text me your address? I’ll pick you up at five.” Michael just nods, not really trusting himself to speak, and Calum pulls himself up out of the chair, throwing him one last smile before he leaves the room. 

Fuck, Michael thinks, as the door swings shut behind Calum, pulling his phone out to Google how to fall out of love with a colleague. 

(It doesn’t help him at all.) 

 ------- 

 Next Sunday comes around faster than Michael had expected, given how much he’s been thinking about it. 

Luke and Ashton had been a little incensed when he’d told them he was no longer going with them but with Calum.

(“What?” Luke had said crossly. “Michael, you already bought your ticket.” 

“Yeah, but it’s a choice between third-wheeling you or one-on-one time with the love of my life,” Michael says dramatically. “What do you expect me to choose?”) 

At five to five, Michael’s sat in his living room, leg jiggling nervously as he checks his phone every two milliseconds just in case he’s somehow missed a notification from Calum in the time it’s taken him to blink. 

Calum, though, doesn’t even text to say he’s arrived, just rings the doorbell at five on the dot, scaring Michael shitless. 

“Hi,” Calum says, smiling, when Michael opens the door. He’s wearing a Nine Inch Nails shirt and straight-leg blue jeans, which should look incredibly nineties and not good at all, but somehow makes Michael want to drop to his knees right there and then. Although, he supposes, that’s what Michael wants to do regardless of what Calum is wearing, so it’s probably nothing to do with that. “You look gorgeous.” Michael has to bite his cheek to check whether he’s still alive and not, like, ascended to heaven.

“Thanks,” Michael mumbles when his mouth floods with pain and it becomes clear that yes, he is actually still alive, feeling heat rise to his cheeks from the sheer intimacy of this moment with a colleague-slash-friend-slash-soulmate-but-he-doesn’t-know-it. He’s so used to seeing Calum in the context of school that it feels strange to see him in normal clothes, standing on Michael’s doorstep. 

“Are you ready, or, like, d’you want me to stand here all evening?” Calum says after a moment, and Michael steps out of the house with a scowl. 

“Fuck you,” he says, trailing behind Calum as they walk to his car. 

“Maybe if you’re lucky,” Calum says, and Michael chokes on his next breath. Calum, however, doesn’t seem to notice, as he’s getting into the car and starting the engine. Michael takes the opportunity to splutter for a second, re-learning how to breathe for the first time in twenty-five years, and takes a deep breath before getting in the passenger side of the car. 

“What d’you reckon’s going to be on the set list?” Calum asks, reversing out of Michael’s driveway and setting off down the street. Michael hums in consideration. 

“Aside from the obvious?” he says. 

“No, Michael, tell me that Dear Maria’s going to be on the set list,” Calum says sarcastically. Michael scowls. 

“I’d punch you if you weren’t driving,” he tells Calum, and Michael sees him grin in the dim light. 

“I’ve found my shield,” Calum says, running a stop sign. Michael squawks as they swerve into the road, grabbing onto the handle on the door. Calum rolls his eyes. “Don’t be so dramatic, I’ve seen how you drive.” 

“Fuck off,” Michael says, scowling, but he can’t deny it. Speed is more important than safety, is his motto - mainly because he always sets off at least ten minutes late. 

“So?” Calum prompts. “Set list?” 

“I hope Monsters,” Michael says. “But honestly? I’d love some of the older stuff on there too.” 

“Yeah, I miss Stella being on the set list,” Calum says wistfully. 

“You saw them when Stella was on the set list?” 

“Yeah,” Calum says, a tad smug, and okay, fuck him. 

“Fuck,” Michael says, and he can’t even disguise the envy in his voice. Calum just laughs, throwing Michael a glance, and his eyes are glittering in the sunset, making Michael’s heart hurt a little bit. “You don’t deserve that.” 

“Hey,” Calum says, aiming for affronted, but he’s still grinning. “Don’t antagonise the driver.” 

“I can antagonise you all I want,” Michael says. “You’re not going to kill us on the way to an All Time Low gig.” 

“Might kill us on the way back, though,” Calum points out.

“Yeah, well, I can probably die happy, then,” Michael says, with a shrug. 

“True,” Calum agrees. “Good music, pretty boy in the passenger seat, what more could you want?” 

“Exactly,” Michael says emphatically, and it takes him until Calum’s started talking about the merits of Nothing Personal as compared to Don’t Panic to realise what Calum had just said. 

Michael’s in the passenger seat.

 ------- 

 The show, as expected, is amazing. 

Michael’s seen All Time Low, like, five times now, and they never fail to disappoint. He voices as such to Calum on the way home, running on a high of adrenaline and having seen Calum jumping in the pit, screaming the lyrics to every single song, which had only made Michael’s whole being-in-love-with-the-hot-PE-teacher situation a little more difficult to handle. 

“Right?” Calum enthuses, speeding along the almost-empty highway. “I’ve heard it so many times, but Therapy live just hits different.” 

“God, I know,” Michael groans, tipping his head back and closing his eyes, letting the memory flash in front of his eyes. “I actually heard the full band version live, once.” 

“Yeah?” Calum asks, a tinge of envy in his voice. Michael savours the moment. 

“Yeah,” he says, a touch smugly. “It was fucking sick.” 

“I can imagine,” Calum says. “I told Alex that they should play it like that tonight, but-” 

“Hang on,” Michael says, cutting Calum off, because he cannot be understanding this correctly. “Alex who?” Calum suddenly looks a little guilty. 

“Uh,” he says. 

“Alex who, Calum?” 

“Gaskarth?” Calum offers after a moment, and Michael gapes at him. 

“You know Alex Gaskarth?” 

“Well, y’know, I used to be in a band, and we opened for All Time Low, and-” 

“You opened for All Time Low?” Michael asks. Calum chews on his bottom lip. 

“Yeah,” he says. “I’m- look, I’m sorry for not telling you, okay? I got the tickets through Alex, but I thought if I told you you might just want to go for them, like, you wouldn’t get it, and-” 

“I can’t believe you didn’t tell me you know All Time Low,” Michael huffs, sinking down in his seat. Calum throws him a worried look, so Michael adds: “I knew there was a reason I kept you around,” which makes Calum smile as he turns into Michael’s road. 

“Fuck you,” he says, but the concern is fading from his face as he parks on the road by Michael’s house this time. They both get out of the car, and then Michael hovers awkwardly by the little path that leads to his house. 

“You’re a traitor,” he says, when Calum rounds the corner of his car and comes to stand opposite Michael. He’s lit up in the orange light of the streetlights, dark brown hair surrounded by a halo of amber, and Michael doesn’t think he’s seen a prettier sight in his life.

“I had to make sure you were coming for me,” Calum protests, a smile playing at his lips. Michael blinks at him. 

“What do you mean?” he says, nonplussed. 

“Well, y’know,” Calum says, shrugging. 

“I don’t know,” Michael says. Calum looks at him oddly. 

“Wait,” he says. “You...you know this was a date, right?” Michael gapes at him. 

“Are you- wait, what?” Calum’s face falls, and he takes a step back, and no, no, no, that’s not what Michael wants. “Wait, no, I-” 

“Fuck,” Calum says, laughing uncomfortably as he cards a hand through his hair. “I probably should have made it clearer, huh? I did say I was bad at asking out cute boys.” 

“Me?” Michael’s voice is a good three octaves higher than usual. “You think I’m cute?” Calum smiles, but it doesn’t reach his eyes. 

“Michael, I’ve been flirting with you since, like, the minute I saw you,” he says. 

“You have?” 

“Jesus Christ,” Calum mutters, and then seems to pull himself together. “Look, I’m sorry if I, like, overstepped, made things uncomfortable, whatever. I’m happy to keep it professional, and-” he cuts himself off when Michael laughs. “What?” he says, and it comes out snappy. 

“Are you serious?” Michael says, and he’s grinning now, so much he thinks he probably looks a little creepy. 

“You’re kind of being a dickhead, now, you know that?” Calum says, a little sharply. 

“No, Calum, I- fucking hell,” Michael says, and a bubble of manic laughter escapes from him. “I’ve been kind of in love with you since, like, before we met.” Calum looks at him for a moment, expression unreadable

“Before we met?” Calum asks carefully. 

“Yeah,” Michael says, nodding. “10C pointed you out, in first period, and I kind of stared at you for half the lesson.” Calum says nothing for a moment, just keeps looking at Michael, and it’s starting to get a little unnerving, when-

“Oh,” Calum says, and a small smile is creeping onto his face. “You- wait, so, like, I didn’t misread it? You do like me?” 

“I mean, I did just say I was kind of in love with you, but sure, I like you," Michael says, and Calum grins, lit up by the streetlights and his happiness, and Michael thinks he’s found space in his heart that he didn’t even know he had since meeting Calum. 

“So,” Calum says. “This was a date?”

“This was definitely a date,” Michael agrees, feeling his stomach flip pleasantly at the words. 

“Would it be cliché to kiss you goodnight?” Calum asks, and Michael grins. 

“Definitely,” he says, “but I’ll kill you if you don’t.” Calum grins back, and takes two steps forward to close the space between them, bringing a hand to Michael’s jaw and pressing his lips to Michael’s gently. It’s chaste, sweet, slow, languid, and Calum kisses like Michael’s the only thing that matters in the world. He smells like mint and pine and vanilla, pressed close to Michael’s chest, slipping an arm around Michael’s waist, and Michael groans into the kiss as he thinks about Calum’s long fingers splayed across the small of his back. 

“Too much?” Calum asks, breaking away, and Michael shakes his head, pressing his forehead against Calum’s shoulder. 

“Not enough,” he says, because he doesn’t think he’s ever going to get enough of Calum Hood. Calum pulls him in for a proper hug, pressing a soft kiss to his temple, and Michael’s glad Calum’s got strong arms because he feels like his knees are about to give in. 

“Do you want to come in?” he mumbles against Calum’s shoulder. 

“Is that a proposition?” Calum says, smile evident in his voice. 

“Do you want it to be?”

“Maybe.” Michael swallows. Jesus Christ. 

“Then it is.” Calum pulls back and looks at Michael, suddenly serious. 

“Hey,” he says. “This isn’t- this isn’t just sex for me. I really like you, Michael. If you don’t want to, that’s okay. I want something more with you.” Michael grins. 

“Have I got to repeat the whole ‘kind of in love with you’ thing again?” he says, and Calum grins back. 

“Alright,” he says, and Michael hears his car squeaking to indicate it’s locked. “You’re making the excuses when we turn up to school tomorrow, though.” 

 -------

 A few students give them strange looks when they get out of Michael’s car in the morning. 

“Is this seriously the sportiest thing you own?” Calum grumbles for the fiftieth time, picking at the green hoodie and black jogging bottoms that Michael had chucked at him that morning. 

“Quit complaining,” Michael says, locking the car behind them and starting across the car park to the school. “Green’s your colour.” 

“Oh, that’s why you picked it,” Calum says, jogging a little to catch up with Michael. 

“Yeah,” Michael says with a grin, unashamed. Calum shakes his head, but he’s grinning too. 

“I’d kiss you right now if I could,” he says, as they turn into the building. 

“What’s stopping you?” Michael asks, as they make their way up the stairs to the staff room. 

“Uh, code of conduct? The contract I signed when I joined the school?” Michael rolls his eyes as he pushes open the door to the staff room. 

“Morning!” he chirps, heading straight for the desk Luke and Ashton are already sat at, Calum in his wake. 

“Morning!” a few people in the room chorus over the general buzz of post-weekend chatter. 

“Hey,” Luke says loudly, frowning. “Why’s Calum wearing your clothes?” 

The room goes still, and Michael just grins. 

[artificiary-fr]

ok so arti’s unnecessary opinion time

Just wanna give a disclaimer that these are just my sort of thoughts in general, and are in no way an attempt to demean, attack, or cause drama about any artist or staff member, or community member. Just kind of what I’ve observed and come to the questions/conclusions of. I got a little opinionated at the end but I tried not to single anyone out save for I think, one unnamed example? 

I’ll put everything under the cut here, because I know I have a tendency to get wordy (and spoiler: It did. This is a super long post, I’m sorry). So, here we go...

TL;DR: I like the gene, I’ll wait for the revamp before giving a concrete opinion, there were definitely some issues, I appreciate that staff took note/action, more communication like this or the dev streams is good (though communication between staff/community is a Thing unto itself of which I probably have a Disliked Take on and that was the really long part that isn’t necessary to read)

Okay before anything: the familiars. They’re super pretty! I like the recolors, and now I’m gonna have to grind the Kelp Beds for those boss fams. Dang. I love the kitty golem recolor.

With that out of the way, here we are - the subject of today’s discussions... Glowtail.

So, my first opinion: It’s not a bad gene! I can see some curious use for it, certainly. But there are some problems with it (and yes; I am aware staff has addressed this and pulled it to fix those problems! That’ll be more relevant later on here c: )

Note One: I think I do understand why it is a gem gene. Yes, design/thematically it does appear to fit the bill of a Baldwin Gene more. But I’d like to posit it’s the completion of a gem-gene set - Wasp/Bee/Glowtail. So in that regard, it makes sense!

Note Two: My personal opinion with the gene is that I like it, but it feels... hm. Plain isn’t correct. Like it’s missing something, I guess? I wish the segmenting was a little more prominent, and that the glow or gradient had a little more glitz/glamor, maybe some glitteries around the hips, to really sell it as a gem gene. I do like the glow we have on the other bits of dragon like light reflection, though, because it adds a little bit of dimension! All in all however even so, I do like it, and I won’t cement my opinion until we see what their updated version looks like in the future.

Note Three (The Problems): The art errors. What... what happened here?

As we’ve noticed, male snappers and male tundras are the two big offenders, with large chunks of color erroneously sitting outside the lineart quite noticeably. There is also part of the ‘glow’ (the aforementioned light reflection) that doesn’t make sense - being on parts of the dragon where it shouldn’t be, like on the front of wings where the tail is not in front of said limb, but behind.

But like... how did this not get caught before it got posted? Was it a time crunch, or it just... didn’t get quality checked before this happened? It’s really unfortunate. :c

Something I do with my art - and this is just my own process/thoughts - is when I’ve put down the base color, before I do any shading/highlights/big details, I pop a layer underneath the entire drawing and fill it with a high contrast color to the palette. That way any bits where I missed coloring in - or didn’t clean up outside the lines - becomes super noticeable, and I can fix it then instead of being a problem later. Maybe doing something like this before throwing the gene through the color automation process would’ve helped?

Last Note:

I feel like part of why these errors went unnoticed is because of how often, and sometimes how rushed, some of these updates have been - and this has been more noticeable in this year than otherwise. Is it because of community dissent with wanting more updates creating more crunch? Due to low-attention reticence creating a need for pushing more ad revenue / more “come to the site there’s new”?

I’m unsure, but it’s unfortunate nonetheless. I think staff, and FR as a whole, would benefit from like... hm. How to word this...

Maybe taking more time on updates / a more extended schedule so things aren’t as crunch (of course this being said, I don’t know what the workload is like so I can’t even say if crunch is applicable), and more open communication? Like how the dev streams were going - that was pretty well liked and everyone I know got pretty excited to see em and how the art was doing. It also opened up the avenue for more open communication / more nuanced opinions or thoughts.

---

But herein lies the huge issue, I think, with communication. This is the part where I’d like to reiterate, this is just my observations, and is not intended as an attack, a vaguepost, or deliberate callout at anybody. There’s no malicious intent here. This bit could also be construed as drama I suppose, and I apologize for that because again - not the intent. Just my take.

I’ve noticed posts going ‘no drama please’ or being tired when new updates come out of like, ‘oh boy here comes the negativity’ so I don’t think it’s just me who’s seen it, but have you guys noticed when anything new comes out, there’s an immediate rush of extreme salt and negativity?

And I don’t mean posts where its like “it’s not for me” or “I don’t like it but here’s [detailed/explained reason why]” - those are the nuanced opinions I mean. Those are fine. I mean the ones where people in forums, or on the more prolific drama blogs, are just.... mean/empty? Like “FUCK staff I hate how lazy they are with this it’s shitty looking” - that really vocal generally super salty in general minority of the community. Just hate without explanation, or just kind of aimless generalized attack/complaint.

I think that’s where communication with Staff fell off the bandwagon. The really loud, really vocal minority of folks who throw super salt or yell “This Sucks You Suck” completely overshadow the people who are well intentioned with sharing their opinions or problems/criticisms. The toxic bits and really vitriolic words are what gets seen and noticed. I think this is the majority of what gets heard, which is why communication got so closed off / shut down unless positive, in recent times. Do I agree with that? No, I don’t either - but I’m just looking at this from the outside. Idk how staff feels or thinks.

And this goes for both people who don’t like the content, and people that do.

Remember that the Keel thread got locked because someone who was white-knighting started getting real nasty with people in the thread, and going to extremes insulting artists who did mock-ups to help visualize their thoughts/opinions and was just being a real douche?

What I really wish was that we could have more open communication. Some of the things I really liked to see were like: Dev Streams, Community Updates/Q&A, Opinion Polls, That Update Progress on Breed/Gene Progress from a while back. All of that was excellent. And I like to see the community responding in well thought out ways! I like to see staff more hands on too! We’re only human and love this site and our dragons and want to see it at it’s best - but they’re also only human, and make mistakes, and we don’t know what’s goin on in there, just out here.

Trello is a really good way to kind of show that communication, and is transparent, but isn’t free-to-use for businesses, so... of course I also don’t know how Stormlight Workshop runs their business/hours so I’m just blowing hot smoke. But anyway, I think everyone would benefit from slowing down and opening up. If things are going slow, that’s okay - if Staff opens up to the community and says “This is taking longer than expected, but here’s upcoming releases / current in-progresses” I think we’d be like oh okay things are happening and it’ll be nice! As compared to everyone gets super antsy, nothing’s happening, no-one is talking... and then we get hit with a bunch of updates, some of which, like today’s, have... issues.

Of course then I worry that with more open talking or “we’re experiencing delays” the more vitriolic will get even angrier/saltier which doesn’t... help... but I mean... yeah. 

ANYWAY so I’ve written a full dissertation essay here without really intending to (see? I warned y’all! I ramble/don’t shut up ahahaha) so I’m gonna just stop myself here before I start going in circles. This last chunk I don’t really know what the meat of what I was trying to say was, now, I think. Sorry about that. It was just “here’s my stream of consciousness” apparently ^^;;;;

Have a good evening y’all! Thanks for listenin’ to my (rant?) if y’all made it this far. You’re appreciated and thank you for letting me bend your ears! Stay safe in this crazy world, hang in there, and have a good one!

[b4kuch1n]

Hầu đồng, queerness, witchcraft, languages, and me

I went to an exhibition today and got really emo, and I promised to make that everyone else’s problem, so I’m gonna post the note I made on my personal facebook page over here too because. yknow. nobody fuckin uses facebook. I dont even use facebook

under the cut for the full deed babey 

---

I'm not an academic.

Took me eighteen years to understand that about myself. Or to accept it, more like; I'm no good with retaining information, with reading, with thinking deep into the logic of something, with numbers and statistics. Never have been. I'm not a smart person, and I will never be. And I'm fine like that.

One advantage to being me that I press a lot in any essay I've ever written, though, is that I make a lot of connections between things that are only vaguely similar. In literature classes this has saved me many times, in other classes much less so, but at the very least I don't have too hard a time choosing dissertation subjects. It is still not an academic kind of observation in nature, however; to be able to turn it in for class, I would have to read up and do research and compare the results to it, to conclude if it's coincidental or not.

It has always been a starting place, in any case. With my mental condition, a starting place is a saving grace.

I'm not in school anymore. Might not be back for a while. I started going to an IUT in France two years ago - just finished it last year - and two months later I started using the nonbinary label, as well as the asexual aromantic one. Of course it's not spontaneous, it's a result of a change of environment through which I realized that oh. I still feel the same about being a girl. Going from one culture to another entirely different one, with an entirely different view on femininity and womanhood, didn't change my own feelings about being considered a girl. So France didn't make me this way, no - it just pushed me to acknowledging it about myself. And I'm still going with those labels to this day, and for the foreseeable future.

A thing about the modern time is that the online space is so ingrained into every corner of a lot of people's life, and queer people even more so, because we aren't the majority and we have a desire for community. The online queer circles I frequent and follow use English mostly, and by this point the language and vocabulary coming with the community has developed significantly, and is constantly up to debate and change, which is reflective of the people who use it, who are people and naturally will not fit into one strict, defined description. It is not perfect - far from it, really - but it's vast, and free, and comforting.

The real place where I reside, in Hanoi, Vietnam, doesn't really have something like that.

It is something I've noticed: we Vietnamese queers don't really have words to describe ourselves in our own language. All we have to work with are insults, slurs we haven't yet reclaimed, and one word that's closest to "queer" in function, which is "bóng". It is a label that covers any of us that are gender non-conforming and non-heteronormative, in presentation and/or in sexuality, but even it is still used in a pejorative sense daily. Most activist groups use English labels and their literal translations into Vietnamese when discussing ourselves. The closest I, who identify as nonbinary and have come out to my immediate family and some close friends in real life, can come to describe my gender in Vietnamese is "neither girl nor boy".

Being nonbinary has brought to my understanding starkly how omnipresent the gender binary is in the modern Vietnamese language. Especially in family matters; it is impossible to talk about myself to my relatives without moving my linguistic presentation to one end of the binary or another. There's no non-gendered word for "uncle/aunt" or "brother/sister" or "grandpa/grandma". Any gender-neutral pronouns feel either too vulgar or too formal. It feels like I'm somewhere I shouldn't be. My own native language, the one I grew up speaking, the only one I knew before the age of eight, refuses my existence.

This has contributed immensely to my discomfort (which I subsequently realized was dysphoria) and the doubt I harbour over my own identity for a long time, and I'm still fighting it to this day. The lack of option in my mother tongue points easily to the idea that my labels, the language I use to describe myself, is foreign, imported, and so is my identity that language describes. To the idea that it's an aesthetic, a fad that comes and goes like any other imported trends. That idea infringes terribly on other parts of my identity, the parts that know, acknowledge, and are proud to be Vietnamese, and are searching desperately for a stable sense of national identity, because we survived history but not unscathed. Those parts so want to lash out at any things perceived as ephemeral, sold by a foreign entity to me to award myself with a sense of superiority. Anything that's finite.

But, it turns out, everything is finite. Even national identity is finite. We aren't the same nation we were a thousand years ago. We aren't the same people we were a thousand years ago. We changed.

The similarities are only threads of silver and gold that link us to people who were. They are important, because in time all things still take roots somewhere, but then in that sense, looking back in time I should be seeing my roots just like everyone else.

I'm present, aren't I? I'm real. Even if my own language doesn't acknowledge me, even if I have to borrow the words I use to shape my own figure in the world, I would still exist without all of that.

I went to the "Hầu Đồng & Queer" exhibition at Ơ KÌA HÀ NỘI today, following one of the silver and gold threads. Almost every deep reading into the history of queerness in Vietnam eventually links back to some form of spiritual worship, and "hầu đồng" is the most prominent word I've picked up. I didn't talk to many people at the exhibition - I'm anxious enough just being outside and taking up space, really - but the environment was welcoming, comforting in a bone-deep sense, and the photos were beautiful. It really struck me how beautiful the models are, all of them, with any "feminine" or "masculine" characteristics that'd pop up on their bare face obscured and blurred by makeup and costumes and the ethereal sense of disconnect from the confines we as humans put on ourselves, as we try to reach the end of who we are. It reminds me of camp and drag, the two things the queer community oversea has been using to express itself. They all use a binary language, warbling between "man" and "woman", but there's also a sense of mirth and that disconnection from confines, whether spiritual or not. I was a bit miffed instinctively when reading the pamphlet that came with the exhibition, at the inevitable of binary gendering in Vietnamese yet again, but when going through the exhibition I get the sense that it's a statement, not just a compromise. Like camp and drag, it's a subversion. It's deliberately going against the "normal", the he and she, taking these things and messing them up in the face of the people confined by them. It's translating queerness into the language used to other it, saying "I'll show you queer. I'll show you different."

It also reminds me of a video I watched a while ago on the PhilosophyTube channel, titled "Witchcraft, Gender, & Marxism", mostly because of how close queerness and spirituality are linked in our culture, and then how both revered and shunned they become. Hầu đồng was the origin of our common word for queerness, "bóng", as well. I am not a spiritual person in any significant sense; I genuinely dislike most rituals I've been subjected to, and I think giving money to a god to buy one's own protection is not only unproductive, but also disgraceful to any powers that be out there. I'm not capable of getting witchcraft past a certain sense of wonder for the concept, but Oliver's thoughts on the subject makes some sense to me - specifically the idea that witchcraft is a form of acknowledgement without understanding of the present. It rings true to us queers, who know how vindictive some of our oppressors can be, and have no doubt if the true genetic understanding of how we come to be were obtained at present time, it'd just be another battle we have to fight. We just are, and past all expectations and constraints, we are fine. Witchcraft doesn't demand a formula of us, it says that this is how it'll be in these conditions, do of it what you will. It's almost utopian in this form, with how accepting it is. Of course, in practice it is not as ideal as in theory, but it teaches me why queerness and spirituality are so close together.

The pamphlet for the exhibition has a small paragraph about the event's purpose, to "bring the audience back to the past, where queerness had had its own place in a society that wasn't particularly open", and with that as well as the exhibition, I get to the end of the thread I followed. We were back then, just as we are now, and there are silver and gold threads tying all of us together, here or overseas. Languages are just the mold we put our selves in, and because we are nebulous, molds will forever be just an approximation. The statues cast from the language isn't true, and that's okay. We get somewhere everyday.

I'm not an academic. I can't prove my identity by numbers and researches, like many people out there. I'm also not a witch, who knows and makes of that acknowledgement something. I just am.

I am, despite a lot of things.

And that's fine.

[filmstruck]

Discussing THE DEVILS (’71) with Kevin Flanagan by Kimberly Lindbergs

Kevin M. Flanagan received his Ph.D. from the University of Pittsburgh in 2015 in English/Film studies (his dissertation: The British War Film, 1939-1980: Culture, History, and, Genre). A book based on this project is under contract with Palgrave (part of the Britain and the World series). Flanagan is also the editor of 2009’s Ken Russell: Re-Viewing England's Last Mannerist and he contributed essays and an audio commentary to the critically acclaimed BFI Blu-ray/DVD boxed set Ken Russell: The Great Composers (2016). He is currently editing Edgar Wright: Interviews for the University Press of Mississippi's longstanding Conversations with Filmmakers series of books.

FIlmStruck: Can you tell readers a little about yourself and how you became interested in Ken Russell's work?

Kevin Flanagan: I'm very much of the video store generation, and my first job and academic interests somehow combined to lead me to Ken Russell's work. When I was 15 or so (this would be around 1998, give or take a year), I remember flipping channels and landing on Bravo's "Five Star Cinema" film, a designation they gave to movies whose rights they had purchased. Other films in this strand that I can remember from the time were THE MEANING OF LIFE (’83) and PATTON (‘70). Anyway, in this particular film, there was an extraordinary sequence that'd I'd stumbled into: a man sitting on a train, with a hand on his head, crouched over in repose, while shadows undulated across his face. I continued watching the film. I gathered it was some kind of artist biography, the story of a composer, but I didn't know his music and was overwhelmed by the images, to the point where I could not really retain the plot. Sadly, our regional TV listings guide did not mention the name of the film, so I was not able to go back and watch the whole thing until years later.

Soon after, I got a job at a video store (Hollywood Video) and began working my way through the back catalog. At the time, I was following recommendations from books like John Stanley's Creature Features or various Leonard Maltin guides. I remember reading about (funnily enough) THE DEVILS (not knowing who Ken Russell was) and renting it, only to be blown away. I had no formal film studies training, nor any critical experience beyond amateur reviews, but I recall thinking that the "look" of the film had a lot in common with the mystery film that I'd been searching for. Certain themes were the same—genius constrained by society, persecution over religious belief—and some actors even seemed familiar (particularly Georgina Hale). I decided to watch as much Russell as I could, and within weeks I'd purchased a VHS of MAHLER (’74) off eBay and realized that at last, I'd found the film that had been haunting me for close to two years! I was soon off to college, where I proceeded to take as many film courses as possible, as none had been available to me in high school. I found my way to cinephilia, film studies, criticism and peripheral things like an interest in serious music all through the lens of Ken Russell!

FS: Seeing a Ken Russell film for the first time can truly be a transformative experience and it sounds like his work really made an impact on you. You mentioned that your interest in Russell also led to your interest in music, and I know that classical music is often an essential element of the director���s work. How important is music in THE DEVILS and was Russell inspired by any particular composers while he was making the film?

KF: Peter Maxwell Davies (who composed the music for THE DEVILS) had a close relationship to Russell during this time. Russell produced two Davies records, featuring his Fires of London ensemble, that were released in the UK by the Unicorn label: Vesalii Icones and Eight Songs for a Mad King. He is a composer of avant-garde "serious music" that might now be called "classical". Russell was by now notorious—and beloved, in some circles—for his films about musicians. His most recent biopics of composers were on Richard Strauss (DANCE OF THE SEVEN VEILS [‘70], his last film for the BBC's Omnibus arts strand) and Tchaikovsky (THE MUSIC LOVERS [‘70], a major theatrical film for United Artists), so there is something of their bombast that can be traced to THE DEVILS. But Russell's commission of Davies to do music for THE DEVILS is comparable to his use of Derek Jarman's sets: an unmistakable modernity of detail and dressing, despite enough historically-appropriate elements that do not feel too anachronistic. The music that Davies delivered for the film is angular and angry in a way that is unmistakably contemporary. At times it feels like a Sun Ra improvisation! But the instrumentation is generally period appropriate. So much about Russell's film of THE DEVILS, just like Aldous Huxley's book, walks a fine line between a clear-eyed vision of the past and the inevitable signposting of the present.

FS: Russell wrote the screenplay for THE DEVILS but as you pointed out, it was based on Aldous Huxley’s non-fiction novel The Devil’s of Loudun. Russell must have found common ground with Huxley since they were both radical thinkers who bucked convention. Both men also grappled with censors who wanted to repress their work. What are some of the differences and similarities between Huxley’s original novel and Russell’s film?

KF: Huxley's book is a weird one. It is based on historical issues and people, but it isn't a conventional work of history. It might be thought of as a book of "ideas", in that it has long divergences away from its central narrative and into psychology, philosophy, ecclesiastical doctrine and allusions to the 1940s and 1950s (critics have noted that the book is Huxley's response to HUAC. The author had worked in Hollywood and witnessed what institutional paranoia did to many of his peers). Russell's film is full of ideas, too, but many of them are communicated visually or sub-textually, or through the gestures and camerawork. For example, scholar Christophe van Eeecke has described the film as primarily being a political allegory, and key sequences like the mummer's play that accompanies a character’s execution show the film's capacity to analyze, render grotesque and represent the world in miniature, as an echo to the viewer on its contemporary concerns.

FS: THE DEVILS was heavily edited when it was released and as far as I know, Warner Bros. has never made a complete and uncut edition of the film available to the public. Why do you think THE DEVILS is still being suppressed and do you think we’ll ever get to see a fully restored version of the film?

KF: Film critic Mark Kermode famously tracked down the extant footage of the film's most famous excised bit, the "Rape of Christ" sequence, and you can view it in his documentary HELL ON EARTH (2004). The BFI have released the film in its longest, officially available U.K. form, and this includes material not in the U.S. theatrical release. I honestly don't know why the film has not been restored to its fullest, since it is a notorious work and I'd imagine would certainly do well if marketed to collectors. 

FS: Despite being difficult to see for many years, THE DEVILS has many admirers. It truly is a cult classic as well as an incredible artistic achievement. Why do you think Russell’s film generates such strong reactions and still resonates with so many viewers?

KF: As you say just now, part of the appeal in the pre-streaming era was that the film was hard to see, so tracking it down made it something of a prized object. For its detractors, the film's mix of sadism, religion and sexuality makes it dangerous. For its fans, the exposure of political hypocrisy, the examination of power and the memorable visualization of hysteria makes it essential. In terms of genre, it is an adaptation, a sort of biopic, a nunsploitation movie and a historical film with comedic elements, so it has that unique "cult" mix that characterizes a ROCKY HORROR PICTURE SHOW (’75) or CASABLANCA (’42). One of the best things you can say about it is that it is timely: it was very much of its moment in the early 1970s, but it also spoke to its historical setting and it is still relevant today.

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A tutor’s guide to lit reviews

A while back I did a post on writing a basic academic analysis essay, prompted by repeated issues I’d seen during my work as a tutor. Based on similar concerns I’ve seen regarding other common writing projects, I’ve decided to expand this into a series. Today I’m going to tackle literature reviews.

I would like to emphasize right off the bat that all this advice is based on my experience both as a tutor and student with a humanities and social sciences background. Take what is useful to you, leave the rest, and definitely listen to your instructor over me.

First of all, what is a literature review? It’s a review of the literature – taking a look at what scholars have written about a certain topic. Literature reviews are often written before or as a component of a research paper. You want to know what other people are saying about a subject before you jump in yourself. What has been covered exhaustively? What is relatively agreed upon? What is disputed? What gaps exist – areas or angles that no one has yet investigated adequately? A literature review can help guide your own research by showing you which areas are worth probing into. When you write it, depending on exactly what your instructor is asking and whether the lit review is part of a longer paper, you may simply focus on the findings of these other scholars or do some more analysis work (what conclusions can you draw? What limitations do you notice?) Overall, it is less about making an original argument than about identifying trends or conclusions made by others, and your thesis will reflect that.  Now, if the lit rev is part of a bigger research paper, your thesis will of course have to do with the research you are conducting.

Doing the Research

Before you start writing a lit review, you’ll need to gather the research you’re going to talk about. If you’re doing a big project like a dissertation, you might exhaustively track down everything you can find. If you’re writing a smaller paper, you’ll probably be less ambitious, especially if your topic is broad. (Imagine reading every article on Hamlet!) Try to make your topic as narrow as you can, first of all. Then prioritize articles that are current (especially if you are in a field that values currency such as STEM fields) and/or highly regarded. “Important” articles can often be identified by keeping an eye out for important researchers’ names and noting how often articles have been cited. Some databases like Web of Science will show you who is citing what, and Google Scholar is moving in that direction. More citations reflect an article that is making waves and probably worth looking at.

Once you have a good selection of articles, read through them. You may decide some don’t fit and discard them. Once you have a set you want to work with, identify their main arguments and points. That’s what your literature review will discuss.

Organization

A common mistake when writing a lit review is to organize it by source. The first body paragraph describes article #1, the second paragraph describes article #2, etc. Instead, the best way to organize a lit review is by concept. You're putting different scholars into conversation with each other. (Academia is a conversation – albeit often a very insular one.) What do most of the scholars seem to agree on? What areas do they disagree on?

As you're doing this, as I said earlier, you may be identifying gaps in the literature. What haven't people talked about? What might they be overlooking or not interpreting right?

Anatomy of a Lit Review

If you’re writing a bigger paper, the lit review will probably be a small portion wedged between your introduction and methodology. This post is mainly designed to help people writing a lit review that stands alone and requires its own introduction and conclusion.

Introduction

Your intro will start out by identifying your subject and justifying why it's important. Why focus on this? It will also identify any major trends you noticed in the literature and major conclusions you can draw (your thesis). If there are any terms or concepts that might be unfamiliar, outline them here, especially if you’re using terms in a way that might not be universal. You should also be clear about your scope – which portions of the subject are you concerned about (ex: caffeine use in young middle-class adults from 18-25). Here’s an example I did for a lit review on ebooks.

The rise of technology in libraries has allowed electronic or e-books – “digital objects specifically designed to be accessible online and read on either a handheld device or a personal computer” – to become a major part of the text-based world (Bailey, Scott, and Best 7). Authors have the opportunity to self-publish their work, students can read assigned chapters on their phones, and librarians can stock texts without having to make room on the shelves. According to the Huffington Post, four out of five publishers now regularly publish e-books (Bailey, Scott, and Best 6). Certainly, e-books are not going away. Instead, they are a growing phenomenon and one that librarians must consider carefully. Librarians face many issues when considering how much to supplement or replace their collections with e-books. Some problems are universal, while others vary between types of books and libraries. For the purpose of this paper, academic libraries and academic e-books will be considered.  

I’ve defined ebooks (although there are some obvious holes in that definition), emphasized that they’re worth considering with some statistics, and identified the scope of my paper (academic libraries and e-books). The second paragraph of my introduction goes on to explain why this is important:

The use of electronic books is a major concern for modern academic libraries and so is an area worth thorough investigation. Newer generations of students are digital natives, accustomed to being able to access information on the go. Being able to read text on their computers and screens is something they take for granted. On the professional side, pricing and space are constant issues. […] E-books both help and hinder library interests. As the digital world continues to grow, libraries must decide how to adapt. Considering e-books is part of that response. Matters of practicality and user preferences both play a part in that decision-making process. […] Taking everything into consideration, research suggests that academic librarians ought to pursue a hybridized strategy keyed to their particular situation. While this may appear non-committal, the tactic aids libraries in serving patrons to the best of their ability. 

Here, I have both justified my topic and laid out a blueprint for my literature review. What are my main topics and themes? I am going to be looking at pricing, space, practicality, and user preferences. Based on the research I looked at, I’ve drawn a conclusion.

Body Paragraphs

As I mentioned earlier, body paragraphs should be structured by idea rather than article. The topic sentence rule I talked about in the last essay post still holds true – start each paragraph with a topic sentence describing the paragraph’s focus. Ex:

Topic Sentence: The impact of e-books on access is a complicated issue. First main point: At first glance, e-books are much more accessible than print. They can be read anywhere at any time and do not need to be carted around. Many students cite accessibility as e-books' main advantage. Supporting details from various sources: In a survey done by Gilbert and Fister, "ease of access" is the top reason students say they might use e-books (474). […] Second main point (counterpoint, putting sources in conflict): However, in some ways e-books are very inaccessible. Some individuals with disabilities might have difficulty reading electronically, even while others may find it helpful to be able to zoom in on text, change its font, or manipulate it in other ways. […] Conclusion: E-book accessibility is not as simple as logging in. While the ability for a student to read an e-book in their dorm room is a draw, it becomes less of one if the screen gives them headaches or they cannot open the book on their personal e-reader.  

Discussion/Conclusion

If you’re writing a standalone lit review, hopefully throughout the body paragraphs you have been looking at themes and ideas shown in the literature. However, you might take some time in a separate discussion portion to contemplate the ramifications and draw some conclusions or make recommendations.

But wait! We’re not quite done.

Recommendations for Further Research

Scholars love identifying areas for further research. It justifies their existence. Based on what you see here, what should be investigated next? What gaps need to be filled? Are events developing so quickly this will all need to be revisited? Do you see any big changes on the horizon? If your lit rev is part of a bigger paper, you are probably going to identify a gap that you’re about to fill! Ex:

E-books, like all other parts of the digital world, are a topic that should be continually checked as attitudes and technology change. […]

An area where e-books may outpace their print counterparts is where they can stretch the medium. […] Further research into more cutting edge e-books and user response could suggest whether this is a field where e-books can gain some popularity, or whether they will continue to be seen as a distraction from the words on the page.  

This site is a good guide to reference. Looking at actual literature reviews is also a good way to get used to writing them. Some databases allow you to search for them specifically. If there isn’t that option, searching with ‘review’ as a keyword or in the title field will often net you a few. Also, just google sample literature reviews!

Again, remember this is all my perspective. I encourage you to seek as many as possible to figure out what works for you. And always follow your instructor’s recommendations.

[thereasonnottodietoday]

Day 7 - inspirational woman

Over the last few days I have had a new clarity on what's going on with my life. I recognise that I have issues with anger again. Resentment and intolerance Among constant feelings of failure today I was reminded that I really did achieve something with my life for my age - I got my first photography job at 15 - I won rotary photographer of the year at 16 - I was accepted into uni at 17 despite having to be 18 to be on the course - I managed to get out of the hell hole that was Biggar high school - I became a head designer at 17 - I somehow managed to wrestle myself out of a compromising prostitution cycle while being full time uni and a full time designer - I managed to get myself into student halls and I made friends - I got my cultural and historical studies essay published - I became creative Director at feroce magazine - I began my marketing career with little knowledge and now am a seemingly recognised trend hunter and regular writer - I managed to graduate and get a great grade on my dissertation despite assault and everything that happened in london - I became editor in chief and owner of feroce magazine and singlehandedlu produced 5 issues so far - I moved back to Scotland and managed to beat depression for a short time before becoming incredibly mentally ill - I had hope - I lost hope but kept going - I have secured about 5/6 magazine features and it was only February 2017 And today I was interviewed for sunny Glasgow radio as a woman of inspiration to be interviewed for international women's day. I was asked what advice I'd give to my formal self. Laura said the interview went amazing and there's possibility of me giving talks to young people interested in persuing a fashion career Although while fashion gave me joy at first my heart still lies in the first things I told the university interviewers 'I'm here to change the world' At first I thought that meant making fur unfashionable. Now it means uncovering the conspiracy that is marketing, branding and manipulation. I'm a marketer but I'm also a creative and we rely on marketing services but the big brands have unethical methods. I feel like a double agent learning the tricks of the trade but at the same time being woke to everything presented to us in fashion media leaves me angered and frustrated at who gets the press next. I have calculated that if you can get one major news outlet to report on you then the rest will follow suit and that is how the cycle goes. I have witnessed the flow of 4-5 press articles on people I know. It's a similar pattern of events that I am analysing thoroughly and I've come to the conclusion that if you can produce content one person - the right person - is interested in, this can develop into that crucial press cycle But the longevity of this and the actual reaping of rewards seems to be slim other than brief sponsorship with free items. None of this press seems to matter How do I explain to the next generation that the industry is barely worth penetrating. Is it really just my own fault that I took some acid and realised all you have when you're dead is what you've left behind. McQueen left a legacy. I would leave a badly constructed H&M market place dress and a satin latex substitute as well as sub par design work but reasonable marketing. I hope my uni dissertation means something one day because I never did go back to collect it. I have never heard myself be referred to as an inspirational woman but when I list my achievements it feels like a different, stronger girl that did that. Not me. How do you tell a young fresh mind their designs will be ripped off by massive companies and they can barely do anything about it ? How do I tell them it's the most expensive profession they may encounter. I got out of design because I saw the same fate as McQueen. I was always a ticking time bomb. Everyone has seen me as a crazy bitch for years, far longer than before I even knew. I had my first suicidal thought st 14 when my boyfriend cheated on me and dumped me. I didn't want my mum to find me. 'Some women choose to follow men and some women choose to follow their dreams. If you're wondering which way to go, remember your career will never wake up and tell you it doesn't love you anymore' - lady gaga 'You can be smart and in your underwear' - lady gaga The quotes that stayed on my wall along with a note from alex stating 'don't be bothered by the small things keep working' or something similar. The man who made the work crazy monster I am now. I just wish I could've been this work crazy monster for him instead of just a disappointing monster. Is that what I'd really have told myself? Don't do it daina. You're. More. Than. Your. Body. Don't sell it. It's worth more than £350 for the hour or £1500 for the night. Your body was worth whatever you want but your mind was fucking priceless. If you'd have spent less time fucking people for money to prove you could be self sufficient you could've got better grades and made the most of the fluke you got in life. Still you left with a bachelors for 20 years old. London destroyed you. You needed to go there and you needed to explore the real world. You wouldn't change a thing and if I could go back and tell you daina I'd tell you you done the right thing by being so detached from reality. You chose not to remember so you wrote it down in diaries on the way to clients instead. Thinking you could die at any appointment but you never did care. You were told you were replaceable. Some men acted as though no one would look for you and they all would have looked for you. You took what you took and you got that money and you have nothing to show for it other than horror stories for a campfire with a lot of weird people interested in your life for some reason. But for a short while you provided for your family. You were raped. You were asked disgusting things. You were made to do things you didn't want to do. You scared yourself so many times you stopped feeling fear When life became real again you got scared and that's okay. You got your first legal tattoos and you solidified a new daina. Young daina please remember you were always destined for something a little bit more than you thought. Know that right now they want your body but one day they'll pay top dollar for your mind and you'll never cringe in the shower as the water runs over the split crevices of your vulva torn by the inability to become aroused around complete strangers. You're going to do what you're going to do. Don't go to the first appointment he tricked you into. You should've bit him harder than you did. You should've looked him in the eye with venom. Not looking at the floor wondering why he received a discount on the disgusting heavy weight of his body on yours You're about to get pretty thin and you won't notice it until you get older. This was for a short while. You fucked that dickface in the wallet right where it hurt in the end and you were protected and loved. Well done for managing to completely detach from your physical self in order to handle everything that was said and done to you. Back to today In the event of my death. I made the decision to become a prostitute unplanned as I was 17 and never thought theyd take me on. If you make something of yourself future daina, don't be scared of what they do or say to you because I'll bet none of them have managed to see feel and hear the things you have and remain clean afterwards. You wanna know what I'd really tell my younger self in a nutshell? You used your body at the right time to make it easier to train your mind. Bitch you did good and don't bother changing a damn thing. Onto the other part of the interview, people I respect or idolise as role models Diane Goldie Michelle Watson Elspeth Van Der Hole Shannon Swift Nadia Lee

[thecoroutfitters]

Although Certainly we will never stay off of skating, the training in addition to knowledge I have acquired from using it get launched countless entrance doors. We are the transmission essential for more successes, utilizing our expertise to help you uplift and also train others within similar situations. A claim that celebrate automatically should be disputable nevertheless there is daft within the dissertation that doesn’t create the reader indicate and also explore the topic after that. I spotted which people’s requirements – whether or not are for love-making, you to definitely talk to, people to interact intellectually – don’t always all have to generally be met with anyone. I would like to perform ditto nowadays. It is usually suggested to cut back bulk connected with records into factor style and to paraphrase your learning. Some people hit his or her stride first and stay with it producing approximately the same more manual workload annually of their total vocation.

associated with Ca Media, 2001, pp.260-284 I hope to implement this kind of scholarship grant within obtaining an investigation in foreign countries software, where by I’m able to understand more about some other cultures’ cultures though performing analysis right now http://www.bucks.edu/academics/courses/syllabus/index.php?lookup=MKTG280 there. They could not be utilized absent or perhaps withheld by means of periodical or maybe academic gatekeepers. Additional information pertaining to education and learning added benefits provided by Virtual assistant is available within the Ough.Ohydrates.

The discounted for U . Leaving Stanford supposed quiting our perfect Cambridge condominium in this perfect educative ghetto plus relocating to a anonymous suburb using economical real estate and neighbors whose politics, life-styles, and also landscaping design were not even close to what we became accustomed to. My own e book sought out associated with print out. They are but not only girls nonetheless gentlemen and youngsters, also. Doubting knowledge of this specific scenario do not need to allow you to throw in the towel as well as turn into corrupt, nonetheless it may perhaps suggest reducing, having significantly less concentrate on final results, as well as becoming far more philosophical in relation to disappointment as well as good results. Being a vital thinker you need to be capable of evaluate distinctive points of view openly plus take a look at these individuals while prospects.

In the earliest collection the writer runs on the well-known price to add the woman subject matter.

Continuing while using model higher than, we would move from the actual account in relation to Michelle into a short dialogue of your breadth in the challenge with drunk owners. We might declare, such as: “Michelle’s account is not singled out. Annually XX (number) involving lives are missing due to drunk-driving crashes.” You could follow this which has a limited dialogue techniques considerable the thing is plus the key reason why your reader ought to love this problem. That proficiently steps you through the report about Mrs . for a true theme, that happen to be the advantages of stricter fines intended for driving under the influence.

This move word efficiently attaches the opening story towards the most important reason for a essay or dissertation, the girl’s thesis: “Proper money management today will involve figuring out interest rates, managing checkbooks, paying taxation, costing the income, and also cash strategy to create ends meet coming from month-to-month.” The following dissertation as well charts out for your visitor the details (underlined the following) which will be outlined in the dissertation.

A ultimate take note: Throughout creating an intro, make sure the intro obviously reflects the goal or maybe intent behind the assignment and therefore a thesis reveals not just the patient being outlined but in addition suggests a specific location this topic that you’re going to help as well as create over the papers. Around shorter documents, the arrival is frequently just one or two lines, nonetheless it can be several paragraphs in the for a longer time papers.

Offer a surprising figure in which provides some thing about the challenge for being dealt with from the papers.

The article writer practices that “attention-grabber” with unique samples of gaining in addition to spending money. Compare just how the specific info on your second illustration coloring a more rewarding image for your target audience in what the article author learned about revenue growing up, as an alternative to this kind of normal report: “As children, I oftentimes tried calculations to run your lemonade stand up.” Inside 1st release, the following assertion results in the various readers to reckon what sort of article writer applied math, playing with the 2nd benefits you can easily view what are the baby does precisely what the woman discovered.

Use rhetorical problems of which place your visitors in a very various predicament to get them contemplating a person’s theme within a innovative means.

Eliminate this specific passage is also a plausible location for a person’s dissertation declaration. Critical thinking is among the main aims throughout a college degree. Needless to say, there is a likelihood of the tougher autumn as long as they virtually all be denied. Most people are certified plus diligent, and you will find fewer returns. It truly is interesting to educative, practitioner, and common readers, and I have not acquired difficulty obtaining sources to research that. Every 1 in 4 ladies is a victim with severe lack of control by a close lover into their life long. Due to the fact an up to date distribution was getting considerable interest, this felt only installation.

Previously simply by Rader, goal-setting uses a many different expertise and it is important in order to master those to be a success in everyday life. Though the premise shows up at the outset of this report, will still be eliminate pursuit. Accurate, My spouse and i recognized the possibilities of a person that had not acquired one or more education coming from Harvard receiving tenure have been incredibly slim.7 But I appeared to be also hectic to imagine considerably concerning stint around people beginning a long time. This red phone mail messages ended up being typically from the archives in relation to past due ebooks plus pointers to have property a qt .

Perhaps you could find an appealing estimate in which properly goes over all a person’s disagreement.

If you have a individual link to the niche, you may readily anecdote or even history to get your audience mentally required.

“Because dwi can lead to needless as well as quick fatalities, long term damage regarding children, along with vast amounts of money allocated to healthcare expenditures, inebriated people must confront exacting penalty charges regarding driving drunk.” The underlined phrases here are the particular “map” that show you the main points involving support you will show inside the dissertation. In addition they can setup the paper’s layout simply because explain to the order in which you will present these types of subject areas.

In the initial set mcdougal runs on the well-known saying introducing the woman’s subject.

The creator follows that “attention-grabber” with certain instances of generating and extra cash. Compare just how the precise information of your second example fresh paint an even better picture for that reader in what the article author learned all about dollars as a kid, in lieu of this specific normal statement: “As a youngster, I often went calculations to run some sort of soda and pop endure.” Inside very first arrival, this particular statement leaves the various readers to suppose how a article writer made use of mathematics, but also in another introduction we can actually find what the youngster does and what the girl figured out.

In the example higher than, your story regarding Michelle may well record the actual reader’s particular attention, although the dissertation is not truly in relation to Mrs .. The eye grabber might get someone planning on exactly how driving while intoxicated may eliminate people’s day-to-day lives, nonetheless it doesn’t introduce the main topics the requirement of exacting drunk driving penalties (or long lasting serious aim with the document might be).

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Looking back and also expounding on my well being all of the methods I am disadvantaged due to this socioeconomic position. Within graduate institution along with the first skilled ages this may not be accurate. An educative employment is definitely strewn together with humbling minimal pointers that give you backpedal for you to planet. Which i wished you could be any physician ever since i had write my term paper service been fourteen. This really is needless to say a central sociological message.

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Scholarship Essay Case 1

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November Round Up

Fallen leaves lying on the grass in the November sun bring more happiness than the daffodils

As expected, November has gone by in a flash. It always does. Deadlines appear, there’s a build up to Christmas, the cold starts to seep into your bones, and everything feels like it’s just a movement towards the end of the year. Whilst December is a month of celebration, November feels like the end of things, an admittance that things are closing before we turn to the joy of December.

I can’t deny that this is particularly true of November this year. I am very aware that I have no idea where I’ll be next year, that this is the last time I will be at university for Christmas - in fact, that everything I do is the last time I’ll be doing it at university. That seems underwhelming when I write it out, but there’s something melancholy about knowing this is the last time I will celebrate Halloween here, the last Bonfire Night that will pass, just recognising that this isn’t where I will be next year. I’m trying not to think about it too much, but coming up to December means semester 1 is done, and I’m halfway through my last year of uni. It’s kind of terrifying.

On the other hand, I’m really enjoying how autumnal everything has become, autumn is by far my favourite season and we’re undeniably in autumn now! It’s been a productive month too, and strangely I’m enjoying the days I spend at the library, a cup of coffee, headphones to block the world out, and just a couple of hours focusing on one piece of work. There’s been some good social times too, of course, namely seeing the new Fantastic Beasts film - lots of thoughts and discussion followed, and it was a really lovely night.

November Successes…

Dissertation - apparently all I have spoken in my round-ups since term restarted. Except I’m actually super happy with where I am. My tutor actually really liked my essay plan which was super reassuring considering I thought he wouldn’t, and then I had to do a presentation to my peers about it. I was pretty nervous about this since I don’t like presenting (who does?) but it actually went well! Granted it was three minutes so there wasn’t much chance for me to screw up, but have it done is a weight of my shoulders, and a motivation to keep working hard on the essay.

Shall we look back to by goal of applying for jobs? I don’t always like my goals for one month to be the successes I pick when looking back over it, but I think I can just about count this one. I’ve written a proper cover letter, and started to look for serious jobs and grad schemes. I can’t say how much success is coming from it, but every little helps, you know?

And on a positive note: Christmas shopping! I’ve been more organised than usual and got an early start on my present shopping. I really like giving people thoughtful gifts that might mean something to them, and I’m not 100% sure that’s happening this year, but yay for being organised, right?

November Faves...

Book/s: Audiobooks So. I know this is vague as hell to say my favourite of the month is simply ‘all audiobooks’, but I really want to take a moment to appreciate them. I’ve only been listening to the Harry Potter books, but they’re just so good! It’s reading with half the effort. Like I said in my HP and the Philosopher’s Stone review I don’t know if I could manage it if I hadn’t read the book before, but I really like going to sleep with a chapter playing, or having it on whilst I get ready in the morning. Definitely recommend audiobooks.

TV: Doctor Who I must be feeling daring to put this here. I think I have about the same relationship as most people who used to love Doctor Who do: somewhere between mid-Matt Smith and Capaldi something was lost. When Jodie Whittaker was announced as the Doctor, I was definitely excited for the show, but not really excited about the show. There was so many ways for it to go wrong. However, having watched all but the finale, I think I’m happy to say that it’s my favourite of the month. It was nice to recognise some of the classic elements of Doctor Who in the new stuff, and whilst I don’t think it’s amazing, it’s definitely a bit of fun, and I’ve enjoyed returning to something that had started to let me down.

December Goals...

Be open and social. Christmas is a bit of a contradiction. On the one hand, I have 4 weeks off uni. On the other, I have nearly 7000 words to write and exam to prep for. So I’m going to say be open because I don’t want to overwork myself - Christmas is a time for reconnecting with people, in my opinion, and I know I can do the writing if I just structure my time well.

Just the one goal for December. Afterall, it’s the end of the year, I’ll be busy, and hopefully happy, and I don’t really have much more to say today. Have a great day guys!

[callmemoprah]

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[how2to18]

IF YOU NEED to ask who Konstantin Batyushkov is, this is the book for you. For fans of Russian poetry, and especially for Russophone poets, Batyushkov (1787–1855) is a vital figure who wrote exquisite verse and helped to usher in what is known as the Golden Age of Russian poetry. Admired by contemporaries, he is read and cited by later poets as well. Peter France, framer of this book, notes that Batyushkov is too often mentioned or discussed merely as a precursor of the best-known Golden Age poet, Aleksandr Pushkin (1799–1837); Pushkin is a relatively minor presence in this narrative, though often “name-checked” to provide context. This selection-cum-biography of Batyushkov is part of the Russian Library now emerging from Columbia University Press, underlining the commitment of that series to making Russian classics available in English. The cover describes Peter France as presenter and translator, which understates what he has done: besides introducing the volume, he is the author of a substantial artistic and intellectual biography of the poet that provides a large selection of Batyushkov’s own writings in France’s translation. The verse is set apart graphically, making it easy to flip through the book following the poetry — ideally after reading the whole thing through.

Batyushkov was a translator of note, as Writings from the Golden Age of Russian Poetry often reminds us. The attention to Batyushkov’s poetic sources suggests interesting ways to compare his translations or adaptations with the originals in Greek or Latin, English, French, or Italian. Of course, it also means looking at a translation of a translation, something of a mise en abîme. It is refreshing that France’s book makes the role of translation explicit (while sometimes offering the original, as with a late stanza or two from Byron’s Don Juan). The approach is valuable for poetry of the early 19th century, and especially for Russian literature, which has on the whole been much readier than most European literatures to acknowledge its foreign sources and their arrival via translation.

France stresses Batyushkov’s dual role both as gifted individual author and as shaper of what quickly became a world-class literature with a more flexible system of poetic genres. This entailed assimilating and recreating poems from other languages as part of his own poetry: “through translation, Batyushkov could create his own individual voice, something different from existing Russian poetry [which was a] still young poetic culture.” As France reminds us, “the first great poet in modern Russian, Lomonosov, preceded [Batyushkov] by only two generations.”

In the first two decades of the 19th century, Russian poetry was indeed a small and largely private scene, featuring almost exclusively aristocratic authors. In this era, poetry often spread in manuscript and could build a reputation without being published, like Batyushkov’s mocking “Vision on the Banks of Lethe.” Batyushkov knew everyone who was anyone at least well enough to exchange letters or to tease in a poetic parody. The likes of Nikolay Karamzin, Vasily Zhukovsky, and Pyotr Vyazemsky make frequent appearances in this volume as friends, authors, and correspondents. (It is too bad that there is no index to help retrieve these moments, especially given the solidity of many of the text’s insights and summaries, but that adds value to the searchable ebook.)

Writings from the Golden Age of Russian Poetry interweaves translations of poetry (plus excerpts from prose essays and personal letters) with history and biography. This usefully lets France prepare his reader for a work’s significance before its translation appears. It also lets him select only high points, whereas the usual poetry anthology would be obliged to include complete poems. The welcoming narrative presentation of information, explanation, and interpretation opens the work to understanding while still putting the poetry at center stage. By the time we reach the poem “My Penates” on page 85, for instance, we know it is important, and reaching it even feels like a reward. This is a wise choice for the first significant presentation of the poet in English. (There have been PhD dissertations on Batyushkov in North America, but they appeal to a different readership.)

Historical background includes Batyushkov’s time in the army, with visits to Finland, Germany, and France, and details of the Napoleonic era as a whole. Batyushkov did much of his best work in isolation in a village, for financial reasons. Some background is left unmentioned; we hear, for instance, that Batyushkov inherited a village from his mother, and that he often stayed there, especially when he was short of money, but not that the village came with serfs, whose labor made living there so much less expensive for him. Many Russians at the time considered serfdom distinct from slavery, indeed a sensible way of caring for the land and accommodating the various roles of the different “estates” (aristocrats, clergy, merchants, and — the huge majority — peasants). Batyushkov probably shared that way of thinking; France notes his conservative tendencies and cites some distinctly unrevolutionary comments from his letters. In fairness, one volume cannot do everything, but social background is particularly important, since the Decembrist movement was brewing, even if the 1825 uprising and Tsar Nicholas I’s response came after Batyushkov had left public life. We do hear about the poet’s more radical cousin, Nikita Muravyov, who was condemned to death in 1826 but had the sentence commuted to exile in Siberia.

France clearly likes Batyushkov as a person. Without smoothing away contradictions, he draws attention to the poet’s wit, cleverness, and congeniality, stressing the elevation of friendship in his elegies and the importance of his friendly missives (as the Formalist critics of the early 20th century pointed out, these were an active part of the literary system at the time, meant to be read aloud in salons). The narrative cherry-picks the most interesting parts of Batyushkov’s letters to fellow poets like Nikolay Gnedich, the translator of the Iliad into Russian and Batyshkov’s close friend, and prepares the reader to appreciate their significance.

These letters [from 1811] to friends are real works of art, frequently prefiguring the new kind of poetry that Batyushkov was writing. They are written from the heart, with frequent complaints about illness, boredom, poverty, and other woes, as we have seen. But they are also performances, full of zest, veering from familiarity to mock pomposity — the sort of letter that needs to be read aloud.

As that excerpt demonstrates, France’s text is highly knowledgeable but refreshingly unacademic. Poets and general readers should appreciate this volume as much as teachers and scholars who can now quote elegant translations. When a work must be seen as a whole to be appreciated, the volume gives it, be it short or long; these include adaptations/translations from the anthology that Batyushkov translated from Sergey Uvarov’s French versions of classical poems and “Tasso Dying,” one of Batyushkov’s masterpieces.

Batyushkov’s connection with Italian language and literature was (and is) unusual in Russia. Tasso (1544–1595) was his favorite, and the Russian poet’s friends sometimes called him Torquato in tribute to this enthusiasm. The attraction to Italian was not just an example of his use of significant foreign models; it expresses his quest for musicality, the sonorous acoustic quality for which his poetry has been noted ever since. Batyushkov eventually managed to get himself posted to Italy in the diplomatic service, though it seems to have happened too late: his health did not improve, he didn’t get along with his first boss, and he was lonely (not many Russians in Naples). He asked to retire after two years and left even before that request was approved.

Among other helpful spoilers, the book quickly mentions and regularly repeats that Batyushkov went mad and wrote almost nothing (as far as we know) in the last three decades of his life. For a reader unaware of this, the retroactive foreknowledge may create tragic suspense, the question of when and how it will happen. Surely the eventual madness has attracted some later readers (especially poets): more than a personal tragedy, it somehow suggests the risks poets (or any sensitive artistic souls) run in Russia, even if, like Batyushkov, they are not at all political radicals or dissidents. His last “sane” poem was written between 1821 and 1824:

Reader, have you not heard

Of gray Melchisedec’s last words?

Man is born a slave,

A slave goes to the grave,

And can he hope that death will say

Why he walked through this lovely vale of tears

Suffered, complained, accepted, disappeared?

We get a compressed picture of the “mute” final decades, as the poet strolled in the provincial city of Vologda, attended theater, smiled at children. One “crazy” poem has survived, and is extremely interesting from today’s point of view, informed by Russian Futurism and other avant-garde movements. France wisely offers both a literal translation of the phonetic play at that poem’s end (“Tsaritsas, rule as tsars, and you, the empress! / Tsars, do not rule as tsars, I myself am a tsar on Pindus! / Venus my sister, and you my little sister. / But my Caesar is the holy reaper [a kesar’ moy — svyatoy kosar’],”) before giving his freer version, which creates similar phonetic play in English (citing the same final four lines):

Be stars for us, my empress, my tsaritsas! Tsars are not stars: Mount Pindus is my state, Venus my sister, you my little sister, My Caesar — scissors in the hands of Fate.

In his translations France strives for metrical and rhyming equivalence, though never at the cost of poetic quality. He uses slant rhyme frequently, and he employs a rich vocabulary. His gift for scansion results in effective and sophisticated deployment of rhythm — whole long sections read without “jingling” or growing monotonous. Given the typically shorter length of common English words, the lines in translation are often a foot shorter (e.g., pentameter rather than hexameter). The reader may find herself settling into the longer translations and wishing there were more, even of a long poem. France is very responsive to form and addresses it explicitly here and there, though in other places a curious reader would have to pick up or look up the original to check for differences (Batyushkov’s work is widely available online, like other Russian poetry of every era). It would be worth citing much more than space will allow here.

One early example, excerpted from a letter, France calls doggerel:

I’m shivering with cold, Though I’m sitting by the stove, Lying under my coat I see the fire’s glow, But I tremble like a vole, Or like a wretched mole, I love the warmth of coal But I wander through the cold, Only verse keeps me whole.

Humor flashes again in a longer complaint about village life: in one stanza, the village doctor “Treats me with wormwood potions / And soups made out of bone, / And with these clever notions / He’ll see me dead and gone.” The poetry rests firmly in its context in Batyushkov’s career and in the whole development of Russian poetry: France notes that the 1813 epistle “To [Dmitry] Dashkov” “marks a turning point in his work. It deals with a subject — war — which in the traditional poetics would have been treated in a high formal ode; Batyushkov’s treatment shows his innovative genius, breaking down the barriers between genres, mixing different styles, solemn, lyrical, and familiar, to express an individual take on life.” The text dwells for many pages on the two-volume collection of Batyushkov’s work, Essays, edited by Gnedich, which included a volume of prose (largely essays: Batyushkov was a particular admirer of Montaigne) and one of verse. France writes:

The first and much the longest section is entitled ‘Elegies’ — and Batyushkov is often seen as a crucial figure in establishing the elegy as the central poetic genre of the Russian Golden Age. The term is a capacious one in Russian literature, but essentially it is distinguished from the more formal ode by its concentration on the expression of personal feelings.

Batyushkov’s groundbreaking anthology translations of classical poems emerge elegantly in France’s translations:

IV

When a girl in agony is fading

   and her body is blue and chilled,

it is in vain love pours out flowers

   and amber; she must lie still,

pale as a lily of the fields,

   like a waxen form; and now

flowers cannot warm her cooling hands

   and perfume has no power.

The poem begins with appropriate stiffness, but its end is genuinely moving, an example both of Poe’s “most poetical topic in the world” and of Batyushkov’s ability to warm it into something vibrant.

France’s recurrent but non-irritating reminders of things and people already mentioned ensure that everything makes sense and resonates where needed with its proper significance. (This should be especially helpful for readers unfamiliar with Russian names.) After the biography ends, the last full chapter gives an evaluation of Batyushkov’s place in Russian poetry. As France suggests by opening his volume with the great Modernist Osip Mandelstam’s poem “Batyushkov,” the 19th-century poet is important enough merely for his impact on other poets, from Pushkin to the present day.

And let me say a few words about Peter France himself, who has translated Russian poets including Evgeny Baratynsky, Mikhail Lermontov, Osip Mandelstam, and Gennady Aigi, not even mentioning his work with French. Many of these turn out to be connected to Batyushkov in ways that are productive for this project; if France needs to cite a poet, he can usually do so in his own version. Toward the end of the volume, he cites Maria Rybakova’s 2011 novel in verse Gnedich, devoted to Nikolay Gnedich, who plays such an important role in this book, as well as Elena Dimov’s excellent 2015 translation of that work from the Russian. France generously credits Rybakova with inspiring his interest in Batyushkov, and thus the volume at hand.

Like the whole Russian Library series, Writings from the Golden Age of Russian Poetry has beautiful production values, and its cover is especially successful, bringing out the best of perpendicular text and the pleasing geometric juxtaposition of a lyre and a cannon wheel. Almost at the end of the volume, following the notes, is a “Translator’s Note” in which France briefly discusses his work on Batyushkov and calls translation “this daunting but (for me) irresistible task.” This draws attention to the book’s double value: it treats an essential Russian poet, and it shows a master translator at the height of his powers.

¤

Sibelan Forrester has published translations of prose and poetry from Russian and Croatian, and of prose from Serbian. She is professor of Russian Language and Literature at Swarthmore College.

The post “Reader, Have You Not Heard?”: On “Writings from the Golden Age of Russian Poetry” appeared first on Los Angeles Review of Books.

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[zoeandersonresearch]

1. Audio Documentary: First Steps and initial research

Program image from ‘Local Beauty Spot’ (2015)

During my first year of study at UAL, I engaged in a an audio documentary project for our ‘Sense of Place Unit’. This was my first foray into any kind of recording, and the outcome was a three minute documentary which explored the themes of living in declining UK coastal towns.

-Exhibition Notes for ‘Local Beauty Spot’ (2015)

The project, I felt, was successful in exploring the small narratives of the interviewees and 'Local Beauty Spot' received praise for its construction. One criticism that was levelled at the work was the continuous presence of the human voice throughout. There were hardly any gaps in the narrative. I mostly disagreed with this criticism and felt that the pace of the narrative worked well for its length.

(See 3D Audiobook section to learn more about creating a story through sound rather than voice).

During the production of this piece, I was first introduced to using different combinations of microphones to capture different environments. I used a Sennheiser Shotgun Microphone to capture the clean interview audio inside and used its directional setting to capture environmental sounds, such as the sea or gulls. This bulked up the narrative and added flavour to what the participants were saying

Sennheiser Shotgun Microphone

This was one of the projects I enjoyed the most throughout my time on the course. I've been working as a music journalist for the past two years, and interviewing is one of the parts of my job that I get the most satisfaction from. I have watched my technique improved dramatically as I have progressed in my career. At this stage, my questions were fairly basic and list-like, and I wanted an opportunity to return to the documentary format, but challenge myself to make something slicker, longer and more meaningful in its content.

Director and actor Werner Herzog

I have always been a fan of the documentary films of Werner Herzog. The first film that introduced me to his work was 'The Cave of Forgotten Dreams' (2011). and was interested in blending reality and fiction as he constantly does in his films

Hertzog's ability to blend real life documentary (the tackling of real world topics) and blend them into a kind of fiction. His balance between the two never feels unwieldy, nor does the viewer ever feel as though they are being tricked by him.

That ability to move between factual and fictitious elements is something I wanted to capture when entering my final project. By using music and cleverly editing narratives, Herzog managed to manipulate the audience. Click here to View the whole of my section breaking down some of Herzog’s key texts.

‘Hip-Hop Psych’s’ logo

When researching my dissertation topic, I came across ‘Hip Hop Psych’, a charity based out of Cambridge University. The charity is mainly academically focused and examines hip-hop lyrics through the lens of mental health.

Some of their essays can be viewed here.

At the time, I was looking into the way that the theme of mental health and wellbeing moved through the hip-hop genre, and how that theme had changed over time. I approached the charity directly and asked them for help with locating research sources.

-Email to Hip-Hop Psych (2017)

-Dr Sulle (left) and Dr Inkster (right)

During my phone call with Dr Sulle (above) he recommended some sources of information about the topic that I might access, including the writing of Dr Raphael Travis who focuses on the ability of hip hop to heal.

Having looked through a number of the publications that Dr Sulle suggested, I found myself becoming interested in where hip hop was now, rather than looking back into its past, which is famously well documented. See section on the influence of Nelson George for more on the documentation and re-creation of hip-hop history.

Check out Dr Raphael Travis talk about his book ‘The Healing Power of Hip-Hop here which includes more themes about using the genre to tackle mental illness.

Front of 1520 Sedgewick Avenue, where the first hip-hop house party was held.

At it's core, hip-hop is about collective culture, and community. Beginning it's story in the Bronx borough of New York City, hip-hop was brought about through parties where pioneers such as Dj Kool Herc would spin records in the rec-room of his apartment complex on Sedgewick Avenue. From these humble origins, the genre was reached global heights. But in the Herzogian style, I wanted to focus on the small stories of those who now exist in the scene that is still healthy and thriving in the city.

During the summer I had been reading an interesting case study book called ‘Hip Hop Underground’ by Anthony Kwame Harrison (2009)

This book was incredibly interesting and I felt, unique in it's construction. Documentary film making could be seen as a highly vouyeristic and even sometimes exploitative activity. However, the role of the anthropologist (Harrison) was subverted in this book. The book charted Harrison's interaction with the then (90s/2000s) San Francisco Underground rap scene. As a rapper himself, Harrison immersed himself within the scene and actually participated in it if the opportunity arose. This approach is very different to the kind of film making typically used in Herzog’s documentaries.

See 3D Audio Book on the ‘Confession Tapes’ for more on the construction of documentary.

In order to get the ball rolling, I watched a number of other documentaries, hip hop focused and otherwise to get a sense of what kind of narrative structure was being created.

-’My Mic Sounds Nice’ (2010)

Again, in my search for dissertation topics, I came across ‘My Mic Sounds Nice’, a documentary film about female rappers in hip-hop. The documentary featured a ‘talking heads style’ which placed a focus on interviews throughout. 

Even though I didn’t really end up covering this topic, it switched me on to a different way of looking at hip-hop discourse and history. 

-Hip-hop: Beyond Beats and Rhymes (2006) 

This documentary mainly covered issues of male identity in rap music and was an interesting, alternate look at some of the issues that are often taken for granted in hip-hop and rap. Just as ‘My Mic Sounds Nice’ dealt with issues of sexism in rap, this documentary took an alternative view of what hip-hop is like today. Again, this lead me to like to try out my own alternative version of hip-hop documentary.

-’Gigsoup’ website logo 2017

Over the last two years I have written for, edited and co-owned the music website gigsoupmusic.com. One of my favourite aspects of working for the site is conducting interviews. 

Since the creation of ‘Local Beauty Spot’ I have been honing my interviewing technique, improving how I speak to my interviewees and what questions produce interesting answers. I decided that I would use all my experience and would combine it with my new found interest in creating a new, up to date type of hip-hop documentary. See section on Jeff Chang and Nelson George for further information about sources of inspiration involved in crystallising my ideas.

-Subway Map of New York City

Over the summer I decided to book myself myself a few weeks stay in New York City. I had been to the city in the previous year and had gotten to know the sights and sounds of it quite well. I decided that this would be a great opportunity to combine my new found interviewing technique with some of the ideas gained from my talk with Hip-Hop Psych. 

My goal was to create something with audio that would convey a different, more modern side of hip-hop culture. See section on the ‘Soul Music’ Series for more information on storytelling through audio structure.

My interaction with Hip-Hop Psych had further increased my interest in looking into mental health and rap. I decided that I should keep this issue as a side theme of the documentary process when proceeding.

CLICK HERE TO MOVE ON TO THE NEXT SECTION.