#the judge from hell 1x07

[1liv]

THE JUDGE FROM HELL 1x07

[darling-i-read-it]

Sorbet

1x07

Hannibal Lecter x reader x Will Graham 

Hannibal Re-Write Series Masterlist

Word Count: 3.3k

Warnings: spoilers for hannibal, surgery, murder, organ harvesting 

Author’s Note: Dudes this is so long and took me forever but I have so much fun with them I could literally care less. I hope you enjoy it as much as I do!

I took lines directly from the script so some may seem familiar.

Official Episode Summary : A murder involving organ removal makes Jack think that the Chesapeake Ripper has resurfaced; Will has nightmares about being a killer; Hannibal tries to seduce Alana Bloom.

I don’t own these characters. They belong to author/director 

(not my gif)

Hannibal walked over to where you were sitting at your desk in the waiting room. You were heavily invested in something on your computer which surprisingly was actually your job. You did a few clicks before you were able to look up at Hannibal who waited patiently for you to be finished.

“You have another appointment at 5:30,” you said pleasantly although he usually didn’t need to be reminded. 

“Yes I know but I wanted to sneak in a conversation.” You raised an eyebrow and took out the earbud that you had in while you worked in solitude.

“I’m all ears,” you told him. He nodded. 

“I’m going to attend an opera singer show tonight, along with dinner. I accidentally bought two tickets, courtesy of rushed times, and was curious to see if you might want to attend with me.” Your lip curled up into a smile and you nodded.

“Sure. I’ve never been to an opera anything,” you said truthfully. “What do I even wear?” He shrugged.

“Something nice. I’m sure you have something in the back of your closet.” 

“I’m sure I do too. Should I meet you here or…”

“If it’s not any trouble I could simply pick you up at home.” You nodded.

“Will’s teaching a late class tonight so I doubt he’ll even know that I’m gone,” you said and as it left your lips your shuddered. You weren’t sure quite how you felt about this now. “I’m curious, why ask me? I’m not exactly cultured, I have a boyfriend,” you said. Hannibal shrugged his shoulders.

“I thought you might appreciate it more than anyone else I know personally.” You nodded. You would tell Will, it wasn’t like you were having an affair or anything. It was simply dinner and a show while Will worked. It just happened to be with Hannibal.

“What time should I expect you?”

“Around 7.” You smiled.

“Perfect.”

-

At exactly 6:59 the doorbell rang. You hadn’t had time to call Will so you left him a note, just in case you got home after he did. You opened the door and Hannibal looked you up and down, a small smile gracing his face.

“You were able to find something nice in the back of your closet after all,” he said. You gave him a small twirl and he did a little clap, chuckling. You were quite pleased with the look you were able to pull together, the dress you had worn to a wedding a few years back still fitting thankfully. It was perfect and ended up complimenting Hannibal’s suit rather well.

“You wash up nice too Doctor. Although I can’t say I’ve ever seen you dressed down.” He nodded.

“I try to stay on alert fashionably,” he said. 

“That’s quite clear.”

-

The show was stunning. You were quite moved by the performance actually and noticed some tears had even pricked at Hannibal’s eyes as well. He was the first to stand and clap. You followed him after to the dinner portion where he seemed to know many more people than you did.

“It’s been too long since you’ve properly cooked for us, Hannibal,” one of the women he knew said. You hung at his side, nursing a glass of champagne. You were still amazed from the show and were happily eating food off of trays as they came by.

“Come over and I will cook for you,” he said simply. 

“I said properly. Means dinner and the show. Have you seen him cook? It’s an entire performance. He used to throw such exquisite dinner parties. You heard me. Used to,” she said teasingly, looking between you and Hannibal.

“It’s true, when you cook it is like a whole event,” you said. He gave you a look, chastising you with his eyes and you backed off. 

“I will again. Once inspiration strikes. I cannot force a feast. A feast must present itself,” he explained. Everyone around you seemed in awe. It was odd to see Hannibal in his element every place you went with him.

“I believe this young man is trying to get your attention,” she said and both you and Hannibal turned to an excitable man. You recognized him, he was one of Hannibal’s frequent patients. At least twice a week he came in. Hannibal swiftly gestured for you to take his arm and you did, curious to how this interaction would go.

“Hello,” Hannibal said simply.

“Hi! Nice to see you. This is my friend Tobias,” Franklyn, you were sure his name was, said. 

“Good evening,” Hannibal said simply again.

“How do you two know each other?” one of the women asked. 

“There should remain some mystery to my life outside the opera,” Hannibal said, dodging the question gracefully. 

“I’m one of his patients,” Franklyn said dumbly. So bluntly you were taken aback. “Who’s this? I didn’t know you were in a relationship,” Franklyn said, pointing to you. You shook your head quickly.

“She’s only a friend,” Hannibal said very narrowly. You were once again amazed at how he handled every conversation. You were beginning to wonder if you had ever seen him frazzled.

“She’s holding your arm,” Franklyn pointed out. You pulled your arm back swiftly and Hannibal let you.

“Simply for support,” Hannibal explained. You nodded. You wanted to call Will. But on the same note you weren’t mad at the cultural ‘elite’ thinking of you as Hannibal’s. It seemed like a nice place to be. “She and her boyfriend are friends.” You nodded and brushed a piece of your hair out of your face awkwardly.

“Ah one of those progressive couples,” one of the ladies said, pointing between the two of you. You were stunned at the idea but weren’t about to ignore how appealing that sounded.

“Not quite yet,” Hannibal joked. You laughed alongside him and still wondered, yet again, what the hell he meant by that.

-

When you woke up that morning Will was beside you. He hadn’t been when you fell asleep last night. You had stumbled inside, taken a shower and passed out on top of the covers. He was tucked underneath as the phone rang. You let out a moan at the early hour and he picked up the phone. You were too tired to make out the words but eventually your hearing and vocal ability came back to you.

“Jack,” he muttered. “Ripper.” He got out of bed, letting you know in two simple words where he was going. You sat up a bit and watched him get clothes out of the dresser.

“Good luck,” you told him, voice cracking from not being used all night.

“Where did you go last night?” he asked, voice equally slurred and tired. You wondered briefly how he noticed you had gone anywhere then remembered you dated the FBI’s best evidence guy.

“I went to the opera.” He turned to you, a judging eyebrow raised.

“For kicks?”

“I went with Hannibal.” He let out a scoff and you slid out of bed, wrapping your arms around his waist.

“Do you not like him?” you whispered into his shoulder.

“I do. I don’t understand him though.”

“That makes two of us.” You felt the bond between the three of you and now you wondered if Will had felt it as well. You couldn’t be sure but you didn’t want to ask him yet. Not until you were sure yourself.

“How was it?” he whispered.

“How was what?”

“The opera.”

“Oh. Good actually. He cried,” you said. Will chuckled and turned around.

“I’ll have to point that out next time I see him for a session. Did you know they aren’t even really sessions? I guess they’re just friends talking,” he muttered thoughtfully.

“I do know that because we aren’t paying,” you teased.

“Go back to bed. I gotta go.” He kissed your forehead and you nodded, all too happy to slip back into sleep.

“Be safe.”

“I’ll try.”

-

You came into work and Hannibal had just pulled in. He had a break at the end of the day and was now into afternoon sessions, Will’s being the last on his list. You and Will pulled up together and you walked inside to make sure he was all settled. 

You walked into the office and Hannibal almost immediately ushered you out but he stopped, curious how the dynamic of the three of you in one room would play out.

“You’ve been drinking?” Will asked, gesturing to the glass on the table.

“I had a glass of wine with my last appointment,” Hannibal explained. 

“You drank with a patient?” Will asked. 

“You didn’t have a patient in the last two hours,” you said, out of instinct.

“She drank with a patient. I have an unconventional psychiatrist.”

“We have that in common,” Will said.

“Am I your psychiatrist or are we simply having conversations?” Hannibal asked.

“Yes I think is the answer to that question,” Will said.

“I should probably go,” you said, realizing you had stuck around longer than you usually would. Hannibal shrugged.

“If this isn’t a proper session, who's to say you have to go. We’re just having conversations and I just so happen to be a psychiatrist.” Hannibal said. “It’s completely up to Will.” You and Will locked eyes and he shrugged.

“Have a glass of wine with us,” Will said. You walked inside and sat on the desk, allowing the boys to have both chairs. Hannibal poured three glasses and handed you each one. “I hear you’ve taken my girlfriend to the opera,” Will said. Hannibal shrugged, sitting in his chair.

“It was an enlightening experience was it not?” Hannibal asked, gesturing to you with his wine glass.

“It was. We even ran into one of his patients who’s obsessed with him,” you said in a gossipy tone. 

“Oh?” Will said.

“I’m not at liberty to give details,” Hannibal digressed. “I hope you don’t mind that we went.”

“Not at all. I was teaching, I couldn’t have kept her entertained otherwise.”

“Hey, I like to come watch you teach,” you said, swallowing a bit of your drink. Will gave you a look and you smiled at him sillily.

“What was the class about?” Hannibal questioned. 

“The infamous Chesapeake Rippers old victims,” Will said. “How, who, when, where. Jack wants all minds on this.” Hannibal seemed intrigued.

“I would have liked to catch that one actually,” you said.

“Why's that?” Hannibal asked. 

“I don’t know. He’s alluring. Or she.”

“I’d bet on it being a he,” Will said bluntly.

“Well you are the expert,” you said. 

“But this last murder, I hear it’s also the Ripper?” Hannibal questioned. You leaned forward, putting your elbow on your knee as you sat on the table. 

“It’s not the same guy,” Will stated. 

“The victims were all brutalized. What was the brutalization hiding?” Hannibal questioned. 

“Careful, surgical removal and preservation of vital organs,” Will explained. This was more than you got during pillow talk. You were visibly intrigued. 

“Valuable organs,” Hannibal pointed out.

“Organ harvesting?” Will asked, surprised. 

“Jack Crawford’s looking for a serial killer he can’t seem to catch. It’s a brilliant diversion,” Hannibal pointed out. You shrugged.

“I’m not you guys but from what I know about the ripper he seems... I don’t know, more personal than that,” you said.

“If this is a different man however,” Hannibal pointed out.

“Organ harvesting under the cover of the ripper would be a good cover,” Will pointed out.

Hannibal looked between the two of you and smiled. He had planned to invite over Alana Bloom for dinner and a drink, cautiously talk about how years ago colleagues thought they were having an affair. Now he thought better of it. Perhaps all he needed was in this room. 

-

“I’m clocking out Hannibal,” you said, knocking on the office and opening the door cautiously. You knew that no one was in there, you had no more scheduled sessions for the day.

“You’re boyfriend has missed his appointment,” Hannibal pointed out, standing from his desk.

“You must have made that schedule without me present.” He showed you where he had written in Will’s name and nodded. “He’s likely at school. I was going to get him if you would care to tag along and chastise him.” He nodded.

“I would like that, yes.” 

You rode in your respective cars there and walked in together. You saw Will, eyes open but not really there. You hadn’t seen him like that before and you quickly walked over to him while Hannibal opted just for saying his name a few times.

“Will?” Will turned around and saw the two of you. He was strangely comforted whilst also being on edge about the dream he was just having about Abigail. “I have a 24-hour cancellation policy,” Hannibal said. You put your arm on his shoulder and he put his hand on yours as he stood up shakily. 

“What time is it?” he asked.

“Nearly 8,” you said.

“I’m sorry Hannibal,” Will muttered. 

“No apology necessary.”

“I must’ve fallen asleep.” Will turned to you. “Was I sleepwalking?” he questioned as though you hadn’t just gotten there.

“Your eyes were open but you weren’t there. No sleepwalking through,” you explained. 

“I felt like I was asleep. I need to stop sleeping altogether. Best way to avoid bad dreams,” Will muttered. Hannibal glanced over the crime scene photos that were sprawled across the desk to the side of the room.

“I can see why you have bad dreams,” he muttered. You and Will walked over.

“What do you see Doctor?” Will asked. 

“Sum up the Ripper in so many words? Words are living things. They have personality, point of view, agenda.” He looked over the pictures further. “Displaying one’s enemy after death has its appeal in many cultures.”

“These aren’t the Ripper’s enemies. These are pests he’s swatted,” Will said bluntly

“The reward for their cruelty?” Hannibal questioned. 

“He’s not bothered by cruelty. The reward is for undignified behavior. These dissections are to disgrace them. It’s a public shaming. “

“Takes their organs away because in his mind they don’t deserve them?”

“In some way.” 

It was almost an honor to watch them work. You didn’t put in any input that their minds wouldn’t come up with themselves. You just stood between them and watched. Hannibal picked up a picture of an arm. You recognized it.

“Miriam Lass?” you asked. Will nodded.

“She’s not like the other victims. The Chesapeake Ripper had no reason to humiliate Miriam Lass,” Will muttered.

“Seems to me he was humiliating someone when he cut off her arm,” Hannibal said. 

“He was humiliating Jack Crawford,” Will said.

“Have you considered your girlfriend as the Ripper?” Hannibal questioned and you scoffed. 

“I prefer a more direct approach.” 

“This isn’t direct enough for you?” Hannibal questioned. 

“Well Will, do you think it worked?” you asked. Will shoved his hands in his pockets and nodded.

“I’d say it worked really well.” 

Jack and Bev walked in then, holding a piece of paper.

“Doctor Lecter, Y/N, what a surprise.” He held up a paper and looked at Will. “We have a lead.”

“Maybe Y/N should stay,” Will said, going into overprotective boyfriend mode.

“No, she should come,” Hannibal said. “She wants to be a part of the FBI one day, consider this training.”

“Well how about it? Care to help us catch the ripper?” Jack asked. You shrugged. 

“How could I refuse?” Hannibal asked.

-

 You were driven to an ambulance garage. You waited in the car as they found out that the ambulance they were looking for was actually taken out and everyone was back rather quickly, driving quickly. 

“This is very educational,” Hannibal pointed out as Jack started to speed to a new location. You got out this time around and stuck close to Will and Hannibal as they approached the ambulance. 

Jack was in front and you heard a booming, “Show me your hands.” Followed closely by a loud, “Dr. Lecter!” 

Hannibal started to run over and you and Will followed but as a distance. There was a man in the back, his hands in a body. Will covered you instinctively but you pushed forward, watching as Hannibal climbed in without hesitation.

“He was removing the kidney. Poorly. I can reattach it,” Hannibal said.

“Do it,” Jack said. Hannibal worked quietly for a few seconds as the whole of the FBI held their breaths. 

“Do you have it?” Jack asked. 

“I’ve got it,” Hannibal replied. 

“Silvestri, show me your hands.” The man raised his bloody, gloved hands and stepped away. “Step out of the vehicle. On the ground. Hands behind your head,” Jack said. 

Yours and Will’s eyes were no longer on the mock Chesapeake Ripper. Instead you watched Hannibal work and his eyes fleeted up to the two of you and then quickly back down to the inside of a human.

-

“I have a butcher who carries sow’s blood. Centrifugate, separate the matter from the water. Creates a transparent liquid. Serve with tomatoes in suspension. Everybody will love the sweet taste,” Hannibal said as he walked around his kitchen quickly. “Are you sure the two of you can’t stay?” 

Will held a bottle of expensive wine in his hands beside you. You shook your head. 

“We have to head home and attempt to get Will to sleep a full night,” you said. Hannibal nodded in understanding. 

“How is Mr. Silvestri’s donor?” Hannibal asked.

“You saved his life,” Will said.

“Been a long time since I used a scalpel on anything but a pencil,” Hannibal said. 

“Why did you stop being a surgeon?” you asked. 

“I killed someone. More accurately, I couldn’t save someone. But it felt like killing them,” he explained. 

“You were an emergency room surgeon. It has to happen from time to time,” Will said. 

“It happened one time too many. I transferred my passion for anatomy into the culinary arts. I fix minds instead of bodies and no one’s died as a result of my therapy,” Hannibal said. You both nodded. 

“We should go. I’ve got a date with the Chesapeake Ripper before Y/N forces me into bed,” Will said. You hit his arm.

“Or is it rippers?” Hannibal asked.

“Devon Silvestri was harvesting organs but not with the Chesapeake Ripper. No connection between them,” Will explained, happy to be right once again.

“Jack must be devastated,” Hannibal said.

“We can only hope,” you muttered.

“Enjoy the wine,” Will said and you were both gone.

1x08

[uservillanelle]

Killing Eve ― 3x06 (Review)

The time has finally come for yet another review. I can’t believe we only have two more episodes and it will be the end of season 3. Seriously, Killing Eve should AT LEAST have 10 solid episodes per season as most of other shows do. It would be just enough content (more than we get now) and without having to stretch things out. Now, theres A LOT to talk about, so I’ll try my best to touch upon as many things and details as I can! So sit back, grab your tea/coffee and let’s get started!

Title cards

I covered this topic back in 3x04 review, but they did it again, and this time the title card game is somewhat different. It’s really apparent that they are experimenting with editing and trying new things and that’s good, because we know that not only they want characters to develop, but to improve and change the editing and production of the show itself.

It was a bit unusual when they swapped from location titles to character names back in 3x04, but this time it was actually fun. I mean “PISS OFF FOREVER?!” This cracked me up sooo bad, I had to rewatch it several times lmao!! And don’t even try to tell me that they left Niko alive for THIS. It’s not the first time he rejects Eve and wants to get away from her, so what is the point of that scene with him? We didn’t get any new information or knowledge. So... I’ll call that waste of precious screen time which, in this case, should be dedicated for Eve’s personal character story because hell, she’s the one who deserves it the most.

Then they did it again with CUBA/NOT CUBA and honestly it cracked me up, AGAIN! I actually loved they did something like this, even though it kind of gave this comedy type of feel knowing how dark and complicated this show actually is. And of course the “THIS IS BULLSHIT” was exactly what Oksana said at the meeting with Helene not so long ago, so them reflecting on that and showing the phrase as a title is so relatable and at the same time kind of expresses how Oksana feels and what she thinks. 

So far they haven’t really decided as to what kind of editing style they are going for, but I do hope that at the end of this season they realize how they will carry the show onwards starting with season 4, because them keeping this up and changing things constantly is not a good thing. Many people find it annoying and really, they aren’t used to any of that, so I hope season 4 will have a more consistent style when it comes to editing and carrying the main storylines, ect!

Niko (ft. Eve)

There isn’t really much to talk about here, other than... Niko being alive makes NO sense, whatsoever. I personally wasn’t expecting to see him being killed off or anything similar to that, but since they basically PITCHFORKED him, just let him die, okay? There is NO way he could’ve possibly survived something like this and that means they have to have a VERY big reason that would, you know, justify him surviving so fans can “ignore” the fact that it doesn’t make sense to begin with. So far, they didn’t provide any reason for that. Niko didn’t say anything useful to Eve... nor did Eve. She was just rejected again and had a confrontation with Niko’s uncle, I believe. Wow, someone of his family members don’t like Eve. What a shocker, right? 

One of the very few options that I could see happening and making sense is for Niko to be alive and for Eve to make a decision and choose Villanelle over him. Not because she lost everybody and she’s the only one she has left, but to be able to choose her because she WANTS to. Instead, what did we see? We saw a very desperate and determined Eve who’s willing to go that extra mile to find whoever hurt Niko. Despite everything, a part of her still has hope for them even now so maaybe, after those fancy “PISS OFF FOREVER” words, Eve will finally come to her senses? Even though most of following scenes had her feeling the same way. So I really have no idea what else to expect and why Niko is still there. 

There’s also a theory going around about how Eve should pull the plug and kill her husband lol. I mean, that way, their conversation from the very first episode about how Eve could kill Niko and that storyline could come full circle, but given what we saw of Eve and her values and mental state.. yeah I don’t see her doing that anytime soon, or ever, in fact. She’s still clinging to Niko somewhat and she must go REALLY wild and dark in order to do something like this. Though, I must admit... I kind of would love to see it as well! At the end of the day we all want dark!Eve to rise... and she is getting there, believe me!

Villanelle & Helene

I’m very conflicted about this duo. Especially after watching the promo/preview of upcoming episode. Yeah... I’m just going to throw it out there. I think Villanelle will end up killing Helene. The meeting wasn’t exactly successful, as Dasha of course lied to Villanelle about having all the control or probably, the description of a Keeper is quite different to Helene and Dasha than what Villanelle already knew about it thanks to Konstantin. So.. could it be that back in 1x07 Konstantin lied to her? Or that Dasha told Helene something different to get Villanelle in line and believing she is actually “moving up” in the world? Honestly, still much to think about.

I LOVED Villanelle’s, or should I say, Oksana’s outfit during the meeting and especially how big of a mess her hair was. I mean the hair perfectly reflects her inner state and yeah, she IS  a mess and she has every reason to be. Someone previously mentioned how Villanelle was the one who went to Russia, but it was Oksana who left it and now I’m starting to really see and feel just how true it is. I mean this episode was almost all Oksana, except a couple of moments where she tried her best to keep her defenses up, for instance being sarcastic with Helene. “Are you trying to seduce me?” I mean... I wouldn’t mind them getting some.. buut, it’s not going to happen. Still, those lines were hilarious as much as they were iconic and yeah, in that moment she was trying to play her main character, which is Villanelle but as soon as she spotted the post card it was over. Oksana took over and she freaked out. The bad thing about this is that she is very emotional and very vulnerable right now, her mind and emotions are all over the place and that could be why she didn’t really think about Dasha being the one who lied to her? Or maybe she did think about it but we aren’t aware of it yet? This can’t mean anything good and I am honestly concerned for her. 

What else I noticed from that scene is that Helene was quite open in terms of deciding to speak to her daughter I’m guessing, in front of Villanelle while not really you know, feeling like she could be in danger? Despite the fact that she is literally standing in front of a killer. I guess she is really used to that and her job is meeting a lot of assassins and other dangerous people? And then there is Villanelle who keeps asking her all kinds of questions, silly or not, she did ask whether Helene was her real name and yet she didn’t answer. In fact, she didn’t answer any of Villanelle’s questions and that is again, concerning. So maybe Helene isn’t her name, but that’s kind of ironic, knowing that Villanelle isn’t really her name either. So yeah, seeing Helene be so...cool around Villanelle especially while she was freaking the fuck out should say something and that probably means she knows exactly how to handle such people and situations like this. I’ll definitely keep my eyes on her from now on. 

Eve

Our precious Eve is finally getting some quality screen time. Not enough, but at least she’s getting some. What I absolutely LOVED about her in this episode is just how confident and sure she is about Villanelle not being the one who hurt Niko. Yeah, let’s remember that the last time she and Villanelle saw each other was on the damn bus where they had a major fight and a kiss. That was Villanelle and she was such a smug asshole there and everything and thinking about this now, it’s completely different person from who Oksana is and it’s mindblowing actually. So to think that Eve didn’t consider Villanelle being the one who hurt Niko, despite there not being ANY evidence that state that is just... their connection is simply incredible. No matter how many times Villanelle and Eve end up hurting each other, they STILL have this hidden trust within each other that I find extremely fascinating and then Eve gets the photos of Bertha Kruger and of course, that’s what Villanelle was doing while Eve was in Poland coming to visit Niko. I’m glad that there is this alibi in Villanelle’s defense to show that she was doing something else, KILLING someone else at the time and the fact that Eve thought that it was Villanelle who killed her, even if she did it in a “nice” way... is beyond me. There is really no one else who knows and understands Villanelle/Oksana better than Eve. Period. 

Another important aspect that is worth mentioning is the fact that the writers are kind of robbing Eve of screen time and character development. We haven’t seen her much this season and especially during the previous couple of episodes and even in this one it seems like Carolyn got more screen time than she did and Villanelle as well, who JUST had her solo episode, which is kind of unfair. However, I do think Villanelle deserved to have her own episode now since her character is going through such a huge change, meanwhile Eve is going through her thing, but it doesn’t feel like it’s as huge and as extreme as it is for Villanelle. At least that’s what they’re showing us. But yeah, I think season 2 was way more about exploring Eve’s inner darkness than this season, which is more about acceptance of her dark self and her feelings for Villanelle. Let’s just trust the writers and see how they will handle Eve’s character during the next remaining episodes and only then we can actually judge the crew and the lack of screen time Eve received, because really, what I noticed this season is that Suzanne really wanted to show EVERY character and so far she has been sucessful in that for the most part, with one flaw, that is the screen time management and yeah, we shall see how that aspect is handled in the next episodes!

Villanelle & Konstantin

So we got the hockey game scene. I’m glad to know that Konstantin didn’t set Oksana up by sending her to some strangers. One of the highlights of their conversation was Konstantin’s comment about Oksana’s mother who he thought was INSANE rather than evil and was hoping for Oksana to awknowledge it instead of killing her. Guess she didn’t really consider it as an option? But does that mean then that Oksana as just as insane and isn’t aware of it just like Tatiana wasn’t? At the same time we know that Oksana KNOWS there is something wrong with her, at least that’s what everybody else keeps telling her, so I wouldn’t call her insane. At the same time seeing that Konstantin wanted to give this chance for Oksana to get some kind of closure by being with her family and especially her mother does show just how much he cares about her. Until... their conversation shifts. Again.

So apparently Oksana knows about Konstantin’s plan to “get out” and she is suddenly interested in joining him. Now this part of the conversation PAINFULLY reminds me of their last interaction of season 2 finale. Especially the part where Konstantin chooses his family instead of Villanelle, who is ALSO his family, whether he admits it or not. They might not be related by blood, but he IS her father and seeing not only her own mother reject her but her father as well will do things to you. So again, Konstantin leaning towards choosing to leave with Irina and leaving Oksana behind only to promise her that he will come and get her is not enough. He betrayed her several times... he left her at the prison in season 1 even though he “tried” to get her out of it. He betrayed her at the end of season 2 by choosing his family over her, and now... now it feels like ANOTHER betrayal is coming and to be completely honest I don’t think Oksana can handle so much rejection at the moment. Of course, Konstantin can’t just pick Oksana over his own daughter, but it’s wrong to play with her like that. She killed her own mother and left her blood family in order to get back to her REAL family who is Konstantin and Irina and neither of them show enough of determination to bring her along which really saddens me. I mean Oksana went through enough as it is... I’m not sure how she will get through this if Konstantin will leave her again... and I won’t have it either. They better not do it again.

Villanelle & Irina (ft. Konstantin) 

I just love, love, LOOVE these two together. I mean 1x08 is one of the most iconic Killing Eve episodes and they are the biggest reason why. I’ve been waiting for them to get together again and those a couple of scenes they got to spend together didn’t disappoint. I LIVE for their interactions. I mean what can be better than two sisters bonding? Especially when it’s Vasiliev sisters. Them fighting like true siblings do, having fun while both of them having this insanely chaotic driving session and at the same time touching upon going to CUBA as well as finding out Irina’s feelings towards her own mom and her boyfriend, who Villanelle doesn’t see any reason NOT to encourage her to kill him lmao! I mean, first Irina sarcastically calls Villanelle a “real role model” and 15 seconds later she is literally driving over her step-father LOL! I mean... I am SO proud of her. She really did take her sisters advice on this without much of thinking and at the same time I am kind of concerned about her. We all saw Konstantin’s reaction to her driving over the guy and well... that’s not exactly the best thing to do.

In Oksana’s defense, I do think she was trying to be helpful in giving Irina this advice, since we all know that’s how she normally chooses to solve problems. By killing. Plus, I don’t think she actually expected Irina to take her advice either way. Let’s take Tatianas case for example. Yes, it’s a lot different because she was mentally abusing Oksana for years and there was lack of affection and all that, so Tatiana definitely deserved it. In Irina’s case... she’s just “disgusted” of seeing her mom with her boyfriend all the damn time and I don’t think she should’ve killed anyone for that. Besides, she was already preparing to leave with Konstantin so what’s the point? She wouldn’t have to put up with them anymore, yet she did it anyways. And what stands out for me about this is that we see Oksana not wanting to do any of that anymore, no more killing, just wanting to get out of this assassin thing meanwhile Irina just had her first kill. Kind of beautiful in a way, of having one of them ready to quit this way of life while having one of them indirectly influence and push the other into the beginning of such dangerous path. And from the looks of it, Irina didn’t seem to feel bad for driving over her step-father, like AT ALL. So I wouldn’t blame Oksana for the whole thing. Yes, she planted the idea in Irina’s head but it was her who actually did it and didn’t feel bad about it.

This whole dynamic just makes me want to remember the lunch scene in 1x08 where Villanelle asks Irina “Are you a bad person?” “I don’t know yet” well, guess now we are starting to see the person she is becoming and yeah I don’t think any of us saw this coming, that their previous conversation could be a foreshadowing in this way!. I’m VERY glad they decided to bring Yuli back this season since she is one of fan favorites and like I said, the dynamic between Villanelle and Irina is just great!

Konstantin, on the other hand... guy is in serious DEEP shit this season and now having to witness his actual daughter kill someone... yeah, I think having to handle Oksana is complicated enough and she alone manages to drive him mad so now the idea of having TWO mentally unstable daughters... yup, it’s time to do something about this. At the same time I kind of see the parallel between Oksana and Irina and how they could be reflecting one another. Tatiana wasn’t there for Oksana most of the time and didn’t show her any affection, ect. Konstantin is of course not as bad as Tatiana was, but the fact is, is that he is not really there for Irina. She’s not really getting as much of his attention and love as Oksana gets from him since she’s so demanding. So it makes sense for Irina to become more like Oksana, having them both be neglected by their parents in a way.

ALSO!!! Is it just me or is Konstantin the FATHER of the entire show lol?! A lot of people thought that he might be the one who killed Kenny. Now, all out of sudden he might actually be his father?! Yes, the thought did cross my mind but I never expected them to address it in that way. So... based on Carolyn’s forried look and silence that followed afterwards... this is the confirmation? Konstantin is Kenny’s dad then? Or maybe Carolyn isn’t sure of that either? Life is SO much more complicated in Killing Eve, I swear lol! Then there’s the thing with Geraldine... not sure where they are getting with this yet. Feels like we don’t really know anything about Geraldine just yet and really.. so far it just seems like she has daddy issues which could explain her amazing bond with her father and him not being there anymore. (I assume he died). Funny enough, we see Oksana having mommy issues. Yes. It is a thing now. And I’m not very excited to see where Konstantin/Geraldine thing is going... 

Carolyn (ft. Geraldine)

We finally get to see Carolyn uncovering more information about Kenny’s case and actually it brings more questions than answers if you think about it. Kenny calling Konstantin, him possibly being his father, Geraldine kissing Konstantin and so on. This is suuch a mess. 

The long awaited conversation with Geraldine gave us more insight as to why Carolyn is so cold towards her daughter and I get it. Really. What I don’t realy get is the fact that Geraldine decided to not mention Konstantin coming to visit her while insisting her mother to talk about Kenny. If she wants them to be truly open about things and just have a honest conversation, she has to open up about other things as well. That includes Konstantin. And gosh, she better tell the truth in the next episode because I’ve had enough with all the lies. Plus the season is almost over and we hardly know anything about her. Please, Suzanne, don’t let us down on this!

Eve & Dasha

I just love how easily Eve teleported to Barcelona lol! I’ve been also waiting for their face off and it happened. I was expecting something a lot more... crazier, physical, but all they did was basically annoy each other by fighting over VILLANELLE and their importance in her life while having this bowling match. The fact that Eve has NEVER done it before makes the whole winning aspect sooo much more delicious and come on, Eve just HAD to notice how Dasha missed one of her strikes as soon as she mentioned that Niko was still alive. Makes me wonder if its THAT easy for someone to throw Dasha off her game, yet she’s soo narcissistic and so ahead of herself. 

Eve’s trust in Villanelle continues to AMAZE me, like no matter what Dasha told her she STILL denied all of her bullshit as if it was nothing and that is coming from someone who had only met Villanelle a handful of times. This is such a nice parallel to season 2 finale where Carolyn told Eve that Villanelle wouldn’t do the same for her. Not only did Eve figure out who Dasha was and that Villanelle was working for her, but she actually went to Barcelona to confront Dasha like that and call her out without much of hesitation. Again, Dasha mentioned “killing” Eve and that is concerning. There is a reason Carolyn told Eve that Dasha ended up killing one of her own... and that, I feel, is huge foreshadowing for upcoming episodes. Dasha IS the problem and she will cause even more. Honestly, I’m afraid she might do something to Villanelle or Konstantin for that matter. After all, she DID kill one of her own to save her own ass and I bet she can and will try to do it again.

Villanelle/Oksana (ft. Dasha)

To put it lightly, Oksana is a mess. She is going through a LOT. We’ve never seen her this vulnerable and emotional before and she has EVERY reason to feel this way. Now, it is sad that people seem to be struggling to separate Villanelle from Oksana. Like I’ve mentioned in my previous post, this episode was almost 95% Oksana and the rest 5% of her trying her best to look somewhat like her old self mostly at the meeting with Helene and during her next kill. After killing her own mother, she doesn’t see or feel the same way about killing. At least not right now. It’s a lot more difficult for her to turn her emotions off now that they are so intense and she can’t focus clearly. She is becoming sloppy at her job and she doesn’t want to do any of it anymore. Now that I’m thinking about it, we’ve seen more of Villanelle so far than we have of Oksana. The previous two seasons we saw only this confident persona that Oksana has created with several occasions where her real self comes to surface. And this season it’s all about peeling those layers, of slowly peeling away Villanelle and getting to meet Oksana. So, we are sooo used to seeing Villanelle in action, her interact with people that we can’t see her being emotional, let alone crying. It’s not like her. Because it’s NOT her. It’s Oksana and don’t know her enough to know what she is like and what is in character for her. Truth is, she is vulnerable, hurt and in pain. She is going through the death of her mother, the loss of her family, the loss of control and being manipulated (again)  by others in doing something for them. It all was building up and now she can’t escape those feelings anymore and she wants to quit. 

I feel like this time she REALLY means it. She really wants to quit and she is willing to give away EVERYTHING. The apartment, the clothes.. and EVE. The first time I’ve watched the scene I got really concerned and scared... because that means Villanelle is willing to leave Eve like that. At the same time I started to realize that this is sooo much bigger than Eve or them being together. This is Oksana wanting to have a new life... and she wants it so bad, she is willing to leave Eve behind. This, right here.. it called CHARACTER GROWTH and I am soo proud of her for reaching this point, of wanting this life, wanting something for HERSELF even if it means giving away everything she loves. That’s when you know she is being serious about it. So maybe this will turn out to be a good thing... maybe when Eve will notice and find out about this... she will be even more willing to accept her feelings for Oksana and they might end up just running away together because they can and because both of them want for this bullshit to end.

Now, Konstantin told Villanelle to NOT tell anyone about their escape plan. She promised not to do it but then she had a breakdown and ended up telling it to Dasha.Such a BAD move. I mean.. Dasha is the last person she was supposed to tell this to... and I’m sure it will cause major problems. Dasha will get someone killed and I don’t blame Oksana. She’s not in the right state of mind and really, if she haven’t told it to Dasha, we probably wouldn’t have as much action and drama happening in the next remaining episodes. So will see. But I really do hope Dasha will fail at whatever she will try to do.

I’ve probably said it plenty of times but Jodie Comer’s acting STRIKES AGAIN! So many powerful performances delivered each single episode, I am speechless and I really don’t know what else to say. Just see it for yourselves. She deserves another Emmy and more! 

Villaneve screen time

This is not really a part of a specific episode review, but more like me wanting to point something out. It’s been 6 episodes already and we only got ONE Villaneve scene. The bus scene. The kiss scene. Yeah, it was mindblowing and amazing but that’s not enough. And something tells me they might not even meet in next episode.. only see each other at the very end of the episode and that’s on it’s own upsetting... I mean I dare to say, even season 1 had more Villaneve screen time than season 3 has. I’m not even talking about season 2, where literally they spend together half of a season together occasionally meeeting up. This show IS about them and their dynamic and how can we have it if they are not interacting together? I get that this season is more focused on character development and them evolving separatelly, but Villaneve still has to be a thing... and they better give us the entire finale filled with Villaneve quality content or else... after all, they ARE the main plot of the show for me and there’s that. 

Overall Thoughts

Another solid Killing Eve episode. Since they have only 8 episodes, they can allow themselves to make such rich, intense and filled with information/action type of episodes and it shows. There were a couple of weaker episodes, but overall this season is getting stronger with each episode and I am very nervous as I am scared and excited for the remaining two! 

As always guys, if you have any theories or thoughts about this episode, Killing Eve in general or anything else, feel free to jump in my ask box or message me directly, I’d love to chat!!

[lostgirlrewatch]

1x07 - ArachnoFaebia

Written by: Emily Andras

Directed by: John Fawcett

Original Air Date: October 31, 2010

In which I claim to have nothing to say about this episode but spend a long time ranting about Lauren and Dyson’s pettiness and other things anyway.

Bo and Kenzi begin to have their first little squabbles as roommates. Then a supernatural giant spider gets unleashed in their house, bites them, and turns them into paranoid homicidal maniacs. The house is quarantined so they can’t get out, and their only choices are kill the spider and free themselves from its spell or die in a fire, if they don’t kill each other first.

“It sounds like whispering kids or giggling elves. Did you bring elves home last night? I’m not judging, I just want to know.”

ArachnoFaebia. Don’t have much to say about this one.

I feel like I should, though. I mean, Emily Andras wrote it, and I usually like her episodes. (Except when I REALLY don’t, but we won’t get to the episode I’m thinking of until Season 3.) Plus, it’s about Bo and Kenzi, which is what I am here for. Eh. It’s a perfectly fine and entertaining episode.

Fuck Pete, Kenzi! Fuck Pete!

Ah, not cool on the cock block, Bo.

“I wish I had man slaves who did whatever I want.” Me too, Kenzi.

Bo and Kenzi have their first “fight,” which is really more of a catty little banter than anything.

Oh, wait. I definitely missed this line the first couple of times I watched this show a million years ago. The setup: Bo compares the two of them to “real life sisters,” which is cute. A few lines later, she says, “Hey, I’m picky, not psychotic.” Kenzi replies under her breath, “Family is always psychotic.” She kind of mumbles it so it’s hard to hear, but I love this. It’s touching, obviously, that she admits to herself out loud that she considers Bo her family. And, of course, it’s another dig at the biological family we have yet to meet or learn about.

This scene at the beginning with Ksenia Solo playing Kenzi playing an exorcist is great.

I really love the Bo, Kenzi, Dyson, and Hale dynamic. They have good chemistry. It’s a fun foursome. Not just as two pairs of best friends plus two pairs of love interests, but as all four of them together. They seem like they’d have a good time hanging out. Bo and Kenzi are like the quintessential lady BFFs, with Dyson and Hale as a dude BFF counterpart.

Bo, oblivious as hell, tries to sit down with Lauren and Dyson and have a genuine friendly heart-to-heart. Being as Lauren and Dyson fucking hate each other, this works out very poorly. Dyson and Lauren spit some nasty words back and forth at each other, all of this stemming from little to no provocation. It’s just the sight of the other sitting next to Bo that raises their hackles, and it takes nothing to have them at each other’s throats. Considering that from where I’m sitting, which is not particularly invested in either pairing, they haven’t known Bo that relatively long, their jealousy seems a bit extreme.

Surprisingly, Lauren doesn’t really take the first shot at Dyson, other than a passive aggressive comment about him not returning her calls, which is no doubt deserved. Dyson, prickled at the reminder and at her presence, resorts to racism. For the cheapest possible digs, of course. How flattering of you, Dyson.

Love when we get to see and hear more Hale. Like this scene where he calls out Kenzi for being jealous of Bo’s ability to seduce anyone. When he’s not fronting as a hyper-horny dudebro, Hale tends to be one of the more coy and observant characters, and I’ve always found him to be both fun to watch and criminally underutilized. But boy, will we get to that later.

In the scene where Bo goes to get a check-up with Lauren at the Light Fae hospital, Bo admits that she was insensitive when she briefly tried to get Lauren and Dyson to hang out at the Dal. I am a bit impressed and proud of her that she is at least aware of it and owning up to it.

Kenzi and Lauren make-out hallucination weird as fuck, no other comment.

Dyson looks nice in this suit. That’s all I wanted to say.

I’m not gonna lie, if Lauren wasn’t a lesbian, I’d be tempted to ship Wolfpants, y’all.

While not as quite as unflattering as Dyson taking cheap shots at her humanity and literal slavery, this bit where Lauren sends him a little nasty, “And we’re close. She knows she can talk to me,” is also kind of unflattering. She looks him dead in the eyes and wants him to know that she and Bo have a deeper bond than Bo has with him (supposedly). Pretty nasty. I guess he deserves it, though, after his douchebaggery at the bar. Dyson fires back with a pretty sick burn by reminding Lauren that he and Bo are, in fact, still fucking. Dyson and Lauren just constantly engage in petty dick-waving in every scene they are in together. Strap in, because this won’t change any time soon.

So why do the “infected” have to be exterminated along with the spider? Is it contagious? I thought people are only infected if they’re bitten? Just get them out of there and burn the place down with the spider in it. Pretty cold of Lauren and Trick to just be like, “Oh well, fuck Bo and Kenzi and Hale, then,” and be prepared to sacrifice them if they can’t figure out how to kill the thing in the next hour or whatever.

What Bo does to Hale when he’s tied up is gross. And, uh, what’s the word. Problematic.

Talking about this in depth is going to open up a whole can of worms, and it probably deserves its own post, but it’s worth briefly acknowledging here what we already consciously or subconsciously know. Which is that a lot of the time, when Bo feeds on or uses her succubus powers on someone, either without them knowing or against their will, it scans as a dubiously consensual sexual encounter at best. In situations like the one with Hale, it reads as straight up non-con, or worse.

But being as that’s the nature of what a succubus is, that’s a given. What matters is how the narrative treats it. Is it treated well in this episode? Not really. Bo was supernaturally brainwashed at the time so it’s not like it was really her doing it, but it kinda bothers me that she defends her feeding on him as, “I did what I had to do,” and at the end of the episode, Hale begs Kenzi not to tell Dyson that “[he] kissed Bo,” as if he had any agency in the matter. I never really thought about this when I first watched the show in high school, so it didn’t bother me. Watching it now, it makes me uncomfortable.

The main character is a succubus, and at the end of the day this show is all good edgy campy sexy supernatural fun, and it's not that deep. Really, it's not. But her being a succubus can sometimes make for a tricky sea to navigate. One of Michelle Lovretta’s main goals was sex positivity, and I think the show succeeds at that in regards to its consensual adult sexual relationships. As to how much or whether dubious consent scenarios muddy up that message, not really sure how I feel yet.

“You’d pick me over Bo, right, Hale? You’re on my side?” Hmmm. I sense shades of a burgeoning intimacy here.

KC Collins playing Hale as a psychopath is pretty scary.

This one-off character is cool and seems interesting. It’s a shame we don’t see more of her.

Bo’s one brain cell not understanding science is really cute.

Dyson tells Lauren that he doesn’t trust her motives. She’s “inconsistent.” And it’s true. She is. He admits to not understanding why Lauren would callously call a strike on Bo but then turn around and kill a man to save her. And to be honest, at this point, I don’t either. Something about Lauren is shifty and Dyson is right to pick up on it. Lauren’s response, “…this time I was Bo’s hero,” is unnecessary and kinda toxic but whatever.

Next up, we have episode 1x08, which was the original pilot. They wrote it, shot it, and showed it to the network in order to pitch the show. Obviously, it sold. Which makes the episode’s distinctively darker tone as compared to the rest of the season quite interesting.

[stahlop]

Once Upon a Time 2x06 “Tallahassee” Review

Reviews 1x01 1x02 1x03 1x04 1x05 1x06 1x07 1x08 1x09 1x10 1x11 1x12 1x13 1x14 1x15 1x16 1x17 1x18 1x19 1x20 1x21 1x22 2x01 2x02 2x03 2x04 2x05

The mystery man from the season premiere is finally revealed and he is Henry’s father! And apparently a complete asshole. As is August. Ugh! I get that forces apparently had to converge together to get Emma pregnant so she could put Henry up for adoption and Regina could adopt him, but did she have to be betrayed by the man she loved to do that? No wonder Emma’s such a tough cookie and doesn’t let people in. Also, Emma in the past will be referred to as young Emma to distinguish the two.

Summary: Emma and Hook climb a beanstalk to find the magic compass that will get her and Mary Margaret back to Storybrooke. In Emma’s past, we meet Henry’s father and how she ended up in jail (and how she acquired the yellow bug).

Opening: Growing beanstalk

New Characters:

Neal: I know he was in new characters previously as Mystery Man, but since we actually know who he is now, I’m putting him in here again. Also, my initial reaction to him was correct, I hate him. We first meet Neal in Portland, OR as he pops up in the backseat of the yellow bug young Emma steals. She thinks he’s the owner, but it turns out he’s also a thief, so, of course, she feels a kinship with him. Now, I’m not sure why, but the costumers did nothing to make him look any younger in this flashback, so he just seems like a creepy, older pervert using a young girl to help him with his stealing exploits. I’m not sure how old he’s supposed to be, but he’s at least 21 since he repeatedly asks young Emma out for a drink and she’s only supposed to be 17. But, I’m guessing he’s more between 23-25, even though he looks his real age which is around 35. Anyway, he gets out of a cop pulling them over by being completely misogynistic with the cop, and they go on their way. We next see him and young Emma in a convenience store and she’s very pregnant, and he refers to her as his wife. Neal distracts the cashier from him and young Emma shoplifting by asking him directions to Eugene on a map. A customer comes in and notices them stealing so young Emma pretends to go into labor. This whole scene is hilarious. They leave and we find out that young Emma is not pregnant and that she was using the bag under her dress to collect the pilfered items. And then they’re kissing in the car. Ew! They go to a motel and grab a room that a family is leaving and happens to not close the door all the way. Well, that’s lucky. Young Emma notices a dreamcatcher and explains what it is to Neal. He calls it flypaper for nightmares. He thinks they should keep it. They’re still living in the bug so young Emma doesn’t find that feasible. Neal suggests getting a real place together. Young Emma is skeptical and even suggests Neverland, which angers Neal slightly. He finds a picture of a map and tells young Emma to point to a place with her eyes closed. She points to Tallahassee, so they decide that’s where they’ll go. Young Emma asks if this is what he really wants and he says what he really wants is her. I really want to believe him, but knowing what we know later, I find it hard to believe. Neal is in a mood the next time we see him. He’s apparently wanted by the FBI and he managed to snag his poster from the post office. He stole some expensive watches when he was in Phoenix. He came to Portland and stashed them in a train locker. He tells her Tallahassee is out, he needs to head to Canada. Young Emma assumes she’ll go with him. He needs to go alone. She doesn’t think so. They argue until she decides that she’ll get the watches out of the locker. They can fence them, use the money to change their identities, and go to Tallahassee. Honestly, I thought that Neal was doing this to set young Emma up even before August came on the scene. But, apparently he really does love her and didn’t plan on being a complete asshole. So young Emma goes and gets the bag out of the locker. I’m still not sure why Neal couldn’t do this. It’s not like anyone knows where he is. Why would security think it odd if he got a bag out of a train station locker? It doesn’t seem as if it’s being watched for any reason. Why did young Emma have to be involved with this whatsoever? It seems like the fencing of the watches would be the more dangerous part of this whole scheme. Anyway, young Emma brings them to Neal and he thinks he can fence them for around $20,000. He’s going to  fence the watches and reminds her to meet him at 9:00, and gives her one of the stolen watches so she has the time. Again, seems like this would be some sort of set up, except he hasn’t met with August yet. Neal is walking to meet his fence and feels someone following him. He runs off and the person runs after him. The guy tackles him and Neal thinks it’s a cop, but it turns out to be August!  He and Neal argue about who’s doing a better job taking care of young Emma. August realizes Neal actually loves young Emma. He thinks that will make leaving her easier, because he’ll want to do right by her. August asks Neal if he believes in magic. Neal considers this before telling August that he obviously does (you didn’t answer the question Neal). August says he’s going to show Neal something that will make him believe. It’s in his typewriter box. And Neal does believe the minute he sees what’s in the box. August tells him about the curse and that Emma needs to break it, and she can’t do that with Neal in the picture. August asks him if he’ll do the right thing. And the right thing is apparently setting young Emma up for stealing the watches. WTF, Neal?  We see Neal meeting with August two months later in Vancouver, Canada. He feels guilty about young Emma (GOOD!) and just wants to know if she’s okay. August informs he she got 11 months. He says it should be him in there. Well, it’s good to know he has feelings about this. Why didn’t he just get himself arrested and not let young Emma know? Why did he have to frame her? Ugh!! Neal wants August to promise he’ll be there for young Emma since he can’t. He does. He gives August the money from the watches and the car (with a clean VIN just like young Emma had suggested) to give to young Emma so she’ll have a fresh start when she gets out of jail. He also asks that August let him know when the curse ends. I’m sorry, I don’t know what could scare Neal so much that he would frame the woman he purports to love for his crime. That is not love.

Character Observations:

Young Emma/Emma: I’m just going to come out and say it. Young Emma is an idiot. She may know how to steal a car, but she clings to Neal because they’re both thieves, and they don’t have any family. We know she’s grown up in the foster system and she was moved around a lot, so she’s clinging to the little bit of stability that she can find. Even if it’s with a much older man that is a thief. So let’s just skip to the part where she’s set up, because this whole thing is absurd. Young Emma goes to meet Neal at the prearranged location after he fences the watches. She calls him up on her flip phone and finds his number has been disconnected. Then a cop comes and tells her that her boy set her up. He called in a tip and is probably off to Canada by now. Why does the cop know all this information? Neal called in a tip to check the surveillance footage at the train station. Ok. What does this prove? She took a bag out of a locker. Unless they have proof that there were watches in that bag, they have nothing. All they have is the one watch young Emma is wearing and there is no proof she stole it. Technically, it was a gift from Neal, so she’s done no wrong there. The cop tells her to give him the watch and then asks if she knows her rights. He doesn’t even say them to her. She just answers yes. Now, while this technically wouldn’t set her free, anything she would say after this would not be admissible in court, so most likely the judge would throw out the case unless there was other evidence that could be used. So when the cop asks where the rest of the watches were and she said ‘Gone, not coming back’ (and yes, she’s actually talking about Neal), that would not be admissible in court as her knowing about the stolen watches. And the wanted poster had Neal’s picture on it of him stealing the watches! Who was young Emma’s public defender? They did a real shit job for her to get 11 months for possession of stolen goods that she a) didn’t steal and b) they never recovered. I seriously cannot figure out how the hell this case even made it to trial, let alone a guilty verdict. The only thing I could even think they’d get her on was being Neal’s accomplice, but she didn’t even know him them, and they could see what foster home she was in and that it wasn’t in Phoenix.  But back to young Emma, who is feeling very betrayed, obviously. We next see her in jail. The prison guard has a package for her that she has to open in front of her. It’s car keys to the bug, with the swan keychain. The guard says at least she has a car when she gets out, and apparently a baby, as young Emma is holding a positive pregnancy test.

In the EF, Emma volunteers to climb the beanstalk with Hook, which makes him very happy. He has a magic cuff they need to use to climb the beanstalk as it’s enchanted so no one can climb it. Was this instituted before or after Jack? Mulan gives Emma poppy powder to knock out the giant. She also asks Mulan to cut down the beanstalk after 10 hours. Emma’s story is about trust. Hook asks her to trust him several times, but after the betrayal of Neal, it seems Emma can’t trust anyone. Or at least not flirty, innuendo dripping, hot pirates. They manage to knock the giant out and get to the treasure room (with a lot of flirting from Hook, and a lot of eye rolling from Emma), before the giant wakes up and comes after them. Hook gets trapped under some fallen pieces of the roof while Emma freezes when the giant comes after them. Emma manages to trap the giant in his own cage. The giant shares with her that he is alone and how the dried bean he wears around his neck is a reminder of how all humans are killers. This hits a bit too close to home with Emma and she walks away rather than kill him with Jack’s poisoned sword. The giant frees himself and shows her a way out as a favor for not killing him. Emma starts to leave but negotiates another favor since she could have killed him twice. Turns out she wants him to not let Hook go free for another 10 hours after Emma rescues him from the rubble and then conveniently handcuffs him to a chain that happens to be there. Emma says she can’t take a chance she’s wrong about him as Hook pleads with her not to leave him there. She tells him he’ll be okay, she just needs a head start. Emma manages to get down the beanstalk right after the original 10 hours is up. Mary Margaret is upset that Emma told Mulan to cut the beanstalk down. Emma tries to explain but Mary Margaret makes it clear that they go back to Storybrooke together.  Emma hugs her (awww!) and agrees.

Hook: He’s overly flirtatious with all the ladies, but especially Emma. He’s the master of innuendos, and he’s sexy and he knows it. Plus, he can read Emma like an open book. He guesses correctly that she’s an orphan due to the same look in her eyes that the Lost Boys have. He also realizes she’s had little love in her life and asks if she’s ever been in love. She lies and answers no. But after she sees Milah’s tattoo, and deduces that Rumplestiltskin most likely killed her as well as taking Hook’s hand, she confesses that she may have been in love once. This whole conversation is weird. What does having been in love have to do with her perception of Hook?  He continues to be flirtatious throughout their whole journey up the beanstalk and once they reach the giant’s lair. And he’s dead sexy when he has to tie Emma’s hand with his scarf. Yummy! Sorry, but that’s just hot!!! He asks Emma to trust him several times but she just can’t do it, which leads to him being handcuffed in the giant’s castle and pleading with Emma not to leave him there. She tells him she just needs a head start, and he screams for her. I think we have an angry pirate now.

August: Ok, I cut August some slack for leaving Emma when he was seven, because he couldn’t handle that kind of responsibility. I get that. But now he’s technically behind her going to jail because he somehow spooked Neal into leaving her? He calls himself young Emma’s guardian angel and he’s trying to make up for leaving her when she was young. Okay, I get that, but to help frame her so she goes to jail? What’s that all about? August admits to Neal that he can’t say no to temptation, that he’s not built that way. This is true, Pinocchio was never good at making the right choice, but it’s such a cop out. And then it gets worse. Neal gives August the car keys and $20,000 to give to Emma so she has a chance to start over once she’s out of jail. Emma gets the car keys, mailed to her from Phuket, where August apparently took the money meant for Emma. August is an even bigger ass than Neal is. Neal at least felt guilty. August only came back to help Emma break the curse because he started turning into wood. That money could have let her keep Henry.

The Giant: We don’t get a lot of backstory. Only that it seems the fairy tale and EF history got his story wrong. That Jack attacked him and killed his family and he’s the only giant left. He’s very angry toward humans because of this. But in the end, he finds an ally in Emma and gives her the compass and agrees to watch Hook for 10 hours so she can get a head start.

Mary Margaret/Aurora: They find some common ground due to both having been under a sleeping curse. Aurora is having nightmares about a burning red room and someone inside it watching her. Mary Margaret seems happy to have a princess to mother, since Emma won’t let Mary Margaret mother her. And Mary Margaret goes all mother bear on Mulan when she tries to cut the beanstalk down. Mary Margaret makes it quite clear to Emma that they are going home together, no matter what.

Henry: He’s apparently having dreams of the burning red room with someone else watching him as well.

Questions:

Was Cora really going to climb the beanstalk with Hook? She doesn’t seem the type to do that.

Has Mulan been to Oz? Poppies are what put Dorothy and her crew to sleep in the movie.

How long have young Emma and Neal been together by the pretend pregnancy scene?

Is Neal having nightmares? Is that why he wanted to keep the dreamcatcher?

The map that Neal has young Emma point to is a map of all the states the motel chain is located.

What does being in love have to do with being perceptive about why Hook wants revenge on Rumplestiltskin? If Emma had never been in love she wouldn’t understand that Rumplestiltskin killed Milah? That would make her a pretty bad bail bonds person if she couldn’t figure things out like that.

Why does young Emma say Neal got away clean with stealing the watches? The wanted poster has a picture of him stealing the watches! Why does Neal have to explain about the security cameras?

Why is Neal running to Canada? They have extradition laws there. He could still be arrested and sent back to the US. Better to go to Mexico instead.

Is Neal not wanted by the FBI anymore? How is he currently living in New York if he’s still wanted by the FBI? Did he change his identity? He would have to if he has an apartment and seems to working somewhere that requires a suit.

How long has Neal had this train station locker? I don’t know what lockers were like in 1999 or 2000, but according to Google, you can only store something in a train locker for a day.

What’s in the box, August?! What’s in the box?!

Neal doesn’t seem to find August talking about curses weird at all? Could he be from the EF?

Why didn’t Neal just leave? Why did he have to set Emma up to go to jail? Just ghost her and run. 

What does it matter if Hook steals other things from the giant? 

If Neal felt so guilty about what happened to Emma that he wanted to know when the curse broke, why hasn’t he come to Storybrooke to find her? Or is he currently on his way?

Why did the giant have the compass on him? Was he expecting someone to try and steal it? Was it special to him in some way?

Are Aurora and Henry seeing each other in the burning red room? Will they be able to communicate with each other?

Did Emma spend two years in Tallahassee waiting for Neal? Or did she just like the idea of Tallahassee enough to go there after she was free?

Observations:

It’s nice that Emma’s false eyelashes stay on so well throughout this entire journey without bugging her at all.

There are apparently no more magic beans to make portals with, as they were destroyed by the giants after a great war led by Jack the Giant Slayer. 

The swan pendant Emma wears around her neck is the keychain Neal stole for her.

Tallahassee is not near a beach. The closest beach is about 90 miles away.

According to the wanted poster, Neal’s birthday is March 23, 1977. That makes him 22-23 at this point.

Now we know why young Emma went to jail in Phoenix; that’s where Neal stole the watches.

The giant’s castle seems to be made pretty shoddily if just walking makes everything shake and pieces of the roof cave in.

Jack’s skeleton is still in the giant’s castle and his sword has his name on it.

Emma has a flower tattoo on her left wrist.

August says that Emma was sent to a minimum security prison in Phoenix. In Desperate Souls Emma says she was in juvie and her records were supposed to be sealed. A juvenile detention center and a minimum security prison are two separate places. Juvie means she’s under 18 and minimum security means she was tried as an adult.

August sent Neal the postcard in Broken.

That’s a pretty big cage considering the giant’s enemy seems to be humans.

Once Upon a Time Firsts:

We actually saw a dreamcatcher hanging in Neal’s apartment in Broken, but this time it’s shoved in our faces and we will be seeing them again throughout the series.

Hook asking Emma to trust him.

Emma’s tattoo.

Names:

Neal Cassidy: Neal Cassady is the name of a beat poet in the 60’s and hung out with Jack Kerouac. Not sure if this was intentional somehow by the writers or if Neal made up his name being that he’s a thief.

So, I’m extremely angry over young Emma’s shoddy frame job, and the fact that Neal and August got away scott free apparently. I love Hook’s flirtiness and his innuendos. All in all, Emma’s backstory was really important to understand why she doesn’t trust real easily, but I don’t see her trusting Hook any time soon, regardless of the circumstances. But she’s finally starting to trust Mary Margaret and hopefully see her as her mother.

Please leave comments and reblog! Let me know if you’d like to be tagged in future reviews.

@searchingwardrobes​ @thisonesatellite​ @justbecauseyoubelievesomething​ @laschatzi​ @profdanglaisstuff @mariakov81

[mtvswatches]

Wynonna Earp 1x09 Bury Me with My Guns On

Wynonna Earp 1x07 Walkin’ After Midnight

Spoilers disclaimer (please read before sending messages or writing comments.)

Click here for previous recaps!

Stray thoughts

1) Oh, wow…

This definitely reminded me of this…

2) “She is also a distraction I cannot afford right now.” Too late, Doc, you’re officially distracted…

#swoon

3) This is exactly what happened and I cannot be convinced otherwise…

But in all seriousness, it’s quite interesting how Wynonna finds herself chasing any kind of feeling now that she’s done with the rage and revenge. The problem is, no matter how many revenants she puts down, she’s never going to get her family back and she’ll never get the forgiveness she so desperately craves. She needs to come to terms with these facts, and she needs to find a new purpose now.

I also find it interesting how she doesn’t find it hard to open up to Doc. For someone who’s quite closed-off and who puts up all these walls, she opens herself up rather quickly with the people she cares about.

4) Holy shit, she’s not messing around…

5) Oooh, this is gonna be like “When She Was Bad”, right?

6) Wynonna is going to be psychoanalyzed on the day she decides to go bad. This should be interesting.

7) Man, this girl is all tough and shit but she definitely wears her heart on her sleeve…

DOLLS: We need to be careful, alright? You're not even a real deputy, Earp, come on.

WYNONNA: No. I'm just the one with the big-ass gun who sends the fiends of Hell to their deaths.

DOLLS: Technically, it's not the gun that kills them, it's…

WYNONNA: Oh my God! You stupid government lackey, you left me in there with a bureaucratic sadist and I was alone and scared.

DOLLS: You're not alone, Earp.

WYNONNA: Or a murderer.

DOLLS: Okay.

WYNONNA: Just once, I want you to say it. That you care about me. Pussy.

It’s kind of refreshing to see this type of portrayal of women, you know? She’s hard as nails but she’s also not afraid to express her feelings and show her vulnerability to others, and that doesn’t make her any less of a badass. You can be both, what do you know?

And not only did Dolls not tell her that he cares about her, but he also took away her badge. Uncool.

8) Oh, that’s a big promise, Wynonna…

That’s like calling bad luck, is all I’m saying.

9) OMG…

She made this poor dude piss himself. Guess the Bad Girl thing is already backfiring.

10) She finally got her way…

11)

What is Drek, other than the witch’s baby/son? Is he a Revenant or is he something else altogether? I’m thinking he’s something else. And what does she mean when she says they “will be gods”? All I can think of is she wants to sing in the meadows…

12) “Lord, girl, you need to blow off that steam.” Please tell me he’s going to bang off the steam out of her. Pretty please?

13) SWEET LORD JEBUS, PRAYER WORKS!

14) So… the Sheriff dismissed Nicole’s report of what she had experienced herself by defining “Purgatory” as quirky. Riiiight. But then, he picked up her report from the trash. So, he’s either waking up and starting to believe there are supernatural forces at work here, or he is the Sheriff because he’s been in the know and assigned precisely to dismiss any type of supernatural claims – a la Snyder in BTVS. Either way, I think it will be an interesting turn of events.

15) They are having two completely different conversations, and I love it…

NICOLE: Um, can we talk?

WAVERLY: Yeah.Yeah. God, we're totally overdue.

NICOLE: I'm not I'm not crazy, right? There's something going on here.

WAVERLY: No. You're not crazy.

NICOLE: Okay.

WAVERLY: I'm not sure I'm ready to get into it.

NICOLE: Why?

WAVERLY: Because it's different for me, right? And it's really personal.

NICOLE: But it's personal for everybody, right? I mean, they must know. People must whisper about it.

WAVERLY: My God, I hope not! No, I kind of only just discovered it. When I met you.

NICOLE: Me?

WAVERLY: Yeah. You're kinda special.

NICOLE: Okay, maybe a little bit more open- minded, but it's not like I have some mystical gift  or something.

WAVERLY: No, I get it. You're a lesbian, not a unicorn, right?

NICOLE: What?

WAVERLY: What?

“You’re a lesbian, not a unicorn” is such an iconic line. Also, there’s no reason you can’t be both, what do you know?

16) I still don’t know what Bobo is looking for, but I guess that’s it for Drek and his brother...

I’m guessing the reason Drek burned to death is that the Stone Witch used one of his brother’s bones to build him up, right? And who was Drek’s father? I wonder if we’ll meet him…

But I keep coming back to this question – what is Bobo after? What is this “lead” the witch promised him?

17) *heart eyes* *fans self*

18) So Doc still wants to kill the witch, even though he now knows it will probably kill him, too. But Wynonna is having none of it…

Get it, boy? She doesn’t want you to die, she wants to keep you around.

19) Why didn’t Wynonna run after Doc? He couldn’t have run that far away in 5 seconds…

20) I really enjoyed the whole conversation between the Sheriff – Randy – and Dolls. I think Dolls is a bit arrogant and he underestimates how useful Randy could be. I also liked how Randy admitted that he figured out the real reason Dolls had set up shop in Purgatory a long time ago, but he’d chosen to turn a blind eye because it didn’t really affect him and he strikes me as the type of guy who just wants to do his job, go home and have a beer. But now his own deputies – and friends – are getting hurt because of all the weird shit that’s been going on in Purgatory, and he won’t have that. So he’s decided to get involved.

Now, I’m not saying that he’s not honest about his intentions, because I’ve totally bought his whole “let’s work together” spiel. But I’m not dismissing but my other theory just yet. There’s still that guy who was a judge or something who had the picture of the seven, so the Sheriff could still be playing lackey to the higher-ups.

21) Waverly just told Nicole that maybe they can be just friends, and I’m like…

22) I LOVE HER…

23) Um, no, I don’t like this!

What the hell is going on? Is this some “I’ll fight my own battles” macho bullshit? Because I expect better than that from Doc. Or is it simply because he doesn’t want her to interfere with him killing the witch?

24) Can… Bobo smell that Doc and Wynonna had sex? That’s so creepy.

25) It’s really smart how Doc put Bobo into a no-win situation. He had to either let Doc go with the Witch or show his minions he wasn’t a man of his word, which would probably turn into a revolt against him. So he obviously chose the lesser of two evils.

26) What does Bobo mean by “I have a very special surprise for you”? What the fuck is he going to do?

27) I really like how supportive Gus is of Waverly, encouraging her to live her own life like she wants and with whom she wants, but I still don’t understand why she would sell the bar? And I’m afraid Bobo’s going to be the new owner. Is that his surprise for Wynonna?

28) Well, considering one of his minions just showed up at Shorty’s asking for Wynonna, I’m guessing that’s going to be the case.

29) I don’t like this…

WYNONNA: Who won't you make a deal with, huh? First a witch, then the Devil himself. You're nothing like… You're just nothing.

DOC: You can judge me all you want. What do I care for some broken woman's evaluation of my character?

There’s so much subtext here is overwhelming. First, there’s Wynonna unfinished line “you’re nothing like...” I think she was going to say something along the lines of “you’re nothing like I thought you’d be.” But that would’ve shown vulnerability at a moment when she didn’t feel Doc deserved it. So she hits him where she knows it will hurt him most. And he pays her back in kind by calling her a “broken woman.” But we know he’s not indifferent to Wynonna’s judgment of his character. On the contrary, it affects him greatly. He’s just probably trying to convince himself otherwise.

30) How many times are they going to point guns at each other in one fucking episode?!

31) So we finally know something about the origin of the Earp curse…

WYNONNA: Tell me about the Earp Curse.

CLOOTIE: The details are hazy, as that was my demon husband. Revenge for the death of our boys. Direct and manly and, quite frankly, boring.

WYNONNA: Not the first word I'd use.

CLOOTIE: Us girls like to take vindictiveness to the next level, don't we, Wynonna? And I wanted my own revenge on Wyatt, so I went after what Wyatt loved most. His best friend.

DOC: You're a liar.

CLOOTIE: I threw it a few juicy morsels like "health" and "longevity," and you were mine.

DOC: You tricked me.

CLOOTIE: When Wyatt found you buried in a whore's muff instead of underground, when he learned of our deal, his heart broke in two. Then I threw you down a well, so that even if Wyatt softened, came looking for you…

DOC: Did he?

CLOOTIE: And you got to spend decades in the dark, knowing your best friend despised you. John Henry. This whole time, you thought it was personal, but it's always been about the alpha dog.

DOC: You shut your lyin' mouth.

CLOOTIE: You're a good sidekick, dear "Doc," but you'll never be a hero. A perpetual second choice. But in the end, everyone chooses the lawman. Everyone.

So the Earp curse and Doc’s curse were two sides of the same coin, one cast by the witch’s husband and the other by the witch herself.

What I find the most interesting, though, is the fact that Doc was Wyatt’s Achilles heel. What did she mean when she said that Doc was what Wyatt loved most? I can’t help but feel gay undertones in that. I mean, why else would Wyatt be so hurt to find Doc buried in a “whore’s muff”? Were they ever romantically involved? I’m going with this theory and I love it.

Also, why did she look pointedly at Wynonna when she said that “in the end, everyone chooses the lawman”? Does this mean Wynonna will choose Dolls over Doc at some point? Because I don’t want that!

32) I love how Wynonna used their previous conversation to talk Doc out of killing the witch right then and there.

33) OMG they’re going to bury her in salt flats!

34) Yes!

WAVERLY: I've always wanted to do things that scared me. But, well, it's not so easy to be brazen when the thing that you want, that scares you to death, is sitting right in front of you. NICOLE: I scare you? WAVERLY:  Yes. Yes, you do. Because I don't wanna be friends. When I think about what I wanna do most in this world it's you. Oh God, that sounded so much more romantic in my head. Just jump in any time, Nicole, because I really, really don't know how to do this. NICOLE: Oh, sure you do. WAVERLY: Maybe I should just stop talking. NICOLE: See, you're getting better at this already. WAVERLY: Maybe you should stop talking too. NICOLE: Maybe you should make me.

I knew they would become a thing, but I really wasn’t expecting to feel so much for them? They’re super sweet together but also super hot, and I definitely got all tingly inside watching them.

35) So… we still don’t know what “the lead” is. We know what it is for, but we don’t what – or who? – it is. But I fear what Bobo might be able to do if he can break himself from the triangle and from Wynonna’s curse…

I really don’t know why they didn’t bury her completely. Oh, wait, is it because if they did, she would die and therefore Doc would die? Yes, that’s probably it.

36) Wynonna basically just asked Doc on a date, and I’m here for it.

37) So, Dolls faked a report of Wynonna passing the deputy exam or something.

38) Called it!

39) I guess that whole “no one’s ever taking anything from us again” thing instantly backfired, huh? What a packed episode, and there are only a few left in the season! I can’t wait where this all leads up to!

40) Hope you enjoyed my recap, and, as usual, if you’ve got this far, thank you for reading! If you enjoy my recaps and my blog, please consider supporting it on ko-fi.Thanks!

[hellyeahrpmemes]

※ FROM DUSK TILL DAWN: THE SERIES 1x07: PANDEMONIUM SENTENCE STARTERS ※

starters from the seventh episode of the first season of el rey’s “from dusk till dawn: the series”! feel free to change names/pronouns/etc.! 1x06 • 1x08

“Let me ask you this… is this really where we belong?”

“It’s true, we put on a good show, and we have a hell of a time, too.”

“Is this really what we deserve? To crawl at the feet of our masters?”

“We are so much more than slaves. We’re brothers and sisters. We share the same struggle.”

“The truth is… they are weak. And we’re strong.”

“That’s the girl that led me here.”

“The hell you doing here?”

“Your investigation led me to this place.”

“What do we do!? What do we do!?”

“This is supposed to work, why isn’t it working!?”

“I have no clue what these things are!”

“If I didn’t know any better, I’d say these things are vampires.”

“Yeah, definitely vampires. Go for the heart.”

“You think you can fight me? Your fight’s over.”

“I’ve been waiting for you.”

“Stop, why did you do that!?”

“Get that gun out of my face.”

“You know, all this time, I thought that I was the one that brought us here.”

“Are you kidding me right now? After everything I’ve done for you?”

“I ditched it at a liquor store hundreds of miles from here and somehow it finds its way back to you.”

“We need to find a way out of here.”

“There’s no way out.”

“This place is sealed up tighter than a drum.”

“You knew about those things? I begged you to let us go!”

“Setting aside the sheer absurdity of this conversation, they have fangs and die when you stab ‘em in the heart.”

“They terrorize people, hunt at the nighttime, tear ‘em apart limb from limb, with fangs and scales and wings.”

“The kid’s not far off.”

“He’s tried to hit on me.”

“You? You’re a professor?”

“I decided to follow him, and it brought me here.”

“Now, I’ve been studying this cult for over 10 years.”

“This is their territory.”

“I’ve seen their writings before, but never anything like this.”

“We’re standing on sacred ground.”

“This place is a source of immense power for these people.”

“It’s been that kind of day.”

“We better make sure that these things are dead. I mean, really, really dead.”

“This wasn’t supposed to be like this.”

“Moon queen, you are my world.”

“No more mistakes.”

“I could feel her inside my head, and she was pulling me close.”

“Maybe us being here pissed them off.”

“This entire club is destined to lure people in.”

“If it’s blood that they want, they’re gonna want more soon.”

“How do we shut it down?”

“You’re one rude little bastard.”

“Let’s just worry about the next wave.”

“We need a plan.”

“We’re gonna need a better plan than that.”

“Thirty million dollars. Is that worth the chance of exposing us?”

“You think I can’t see the bullshit in your eyes?”

“You were in charge, which you reminded me of every five seconds.”

“What is this act that you keep talking about?”

“You are so up your own ass right now.”

“Now I was an easy target. In a million years, I wouldn’t have seen this coming.”

“You know, you’re right. We have a sacred bond.”

“I wouldn’t be so quick to judge.”

“I know you’re scared. I am, too.”

“Do you think that I don’t know that money was for Vanessa?”

“You honestly think I would be here if I was gonna bail on you? Does that make sense?”

“I did it all for you, you understand me? I said goodbye to my only chance of any kind of sane, normal existence.”

“Oh, that’s it, isn’t it?”

“I’m getting real sick of you calling me a traitor.”

“As soon as we’re out of here, you and me, we’re done.”

“It looks like somebody hurt your feelings.”

“Underneath your heavy French perfume, some of us can still smell your fear.”

“Tonight is special. Tonight, all the little surprises are gonna keep on coming.”

“Have you lost your mind?”

“There’s a difference between being a slave in your body and being a slave in your soul.”

“We have suffered too long, now. But it ends tonight.”

“You have a choice. You join us, and live free, or… you die being slaves.”

“What did you do to me, fool?”

“There’s a fine line between self-defense and depraved violence.”

“I had the craziest nightmare.”

“I know you better than your brother does.”

“I asked you to trust me, but I didn’t tell you what was coming.”

“The world is much more complicated than you know.”

“I don’t want to hurt you.”

“I need you. And you need me, too.”

[singingwordwright]

#Shadowhunters Timeline

HERE IT IS, FOLKS. I’ve improved the Shadowhunters timeline (sort of.)

First off, If you want to see this in calendar format, I have created Google Calendars. 

Full Shadowhunters Timeline Calendar

Important Malec Moments Calendar

Click on the events to read my notes explaining my reasoning behind choosing that date/time.

(I haven’t tried looking at these calendars from any other time zone; hopefully they will work. Let me know if the times seem off and I will try to fix that.)

If you want the timeline in long form, keep reading.

What Year Is It? Survey says: 2016

There are several indicators in the show that Shadowhunters takes place in 2016. These are as follows, from least to most compelling:

The show began airing in 2016, so it makes sense that’s when it would be set.

In 2x16 the Lewis family observes Yom Kippur. In 2015 and 2017, Yom Kippur was in late September. In 2016, it was in early-mid October. This offers nearly two weeks more for events to unfold.

In 2x05 when Clary is researching warlock case files, Magnus has two infractions dated 2016. Most likely, those infractions were the result of his actions relating to Raj and Alec in 2x03.

In 1x07 when Elaine and Rebecca Lewis are arguing with each other during Simon’s “intervention” Elaine clearly says it’s 2016.

That last one really sort of seals it. The show takes place in 2016.

Immovable Date Indicators

Having determined that the show takes place in 2016, that leaves us with two non-negotiable dates around which to build a timeline:

The first is Clary’s birthday (1x01) which book canon establishes to be August 23. There is an argument to be made that show canon may not adhere to book canon with regard to birthdays, but the writers and producers have repeatedly tweeted out Happy Birthday messages for the characters on their book-canon birthdays.

The second is Yom Kippur (2x16). Yom Kippur in 2016 took place starting at sunset on October 11 and ending after sunset on October 12.

This means that when Simon was fasting for Yom Kippur, it was October 12, and the dinner he and Maia attend with the Lewis family takes place after sunset on the 12th.

Once these two episodes are considered set in stone as having taken place on August 23 and October 12, respectively, we can then build the rest of the timeline around those dates.

A Few More Notes

It’s canonically established that demons have an aversion to sunlight, or are actually killed by sunlight (2x05.)

Thus, it’s a somewhat safe assumption that Shadowhunters tend to work the night shift and sleep during the day. A lot of time when there’s a question of what the characters were doing, it happens in the early part of the day and we can probably headcanon that they were getting some sleep.

This is confirmed (among other places) in 1x04 when Clary, Alec, and Hodge are all asleep when Clary concludes Magnus Bane took her memories, only an hour or two after rescuing Simon at dawn from the Hotel Dumort.

Also, I rely a lot on sunrise and sunset for time clues, but sunrise and sunset happen at different times depending on the date. I have taken those times from this site, for reference.

In season 2B what time it is in Idris becomes increasingly relevant. The show is surprisingly good about remembering that there is a time zone difference. But what time zone? We know from 2x19 that Idris borders Switzerland somewhere, so our safest bet is to assume it’s in the same time zone as Switzerland. In other words, Idris local time is about five hours ahead of New York time.

SEASON ONE (August 23, 2016 - September 8, 2016)

1x01 “The Mortal Cup” Timeframe: August 23 (afternoon) – August 25 (before dawn)

It’s perhaps early to mid afternoon when Clary has her interview at The Brooklyn Academy of Art

Dot is closing the antiques shop when Clary gets home, so we may assume it’s around 5pm when Jocelyn gives Clary her gift. This is also confirmed by the fact that Jocelyn is expecting them to eat dinner together, so it’s around dinner time

Sunset in NYC on August 23, 2016 was 7:42pm. It’s already dark when Clary, Simon and Maureen are talking on top of the van before Simon and Maureen’s gig at the coffee shop, which puts the gig at 9-10pm at the earliest

The events at Pandemonium probably took place sometime between 11pm on the 23rd and 1am on the 24th

When Clary portals into the police station after returning home following the events at Pandemonium, Captain Vargas says it’s 2am (thus it is now the 24th) 

When Simon calls after Clary wakes up in the Institute, he says she hasn’t answered her phone in two days. It appears to be in the pre-dawn hours of the 25th at this point (Izzy says she’s about to make breakfast at the beginning of 1x02, which takes place immediately after this scene

1x02 “The Descent Into Hell Isn’t Easy” Timeframe: August 25 (pre-dawn) to August 26 (shortly after midnight)

When Simon finds Clary at the Institute, it’s still dark outside

Once he gets inside, Izzy remarks that she was just about to make breakfast. So we may assume it’s very early in the morning on the 25th.

Exterior shot suggests it’s pre-dawn when Luke is in Clary’s burnt-out room, packing up her belongings

What happens to the rest of the day??? I assume at some point everyone got some sleep (was Simon just hanging out in the Institute all day?)

It looks like it might still be light out judging from the lighting when Izzy is giving Clary more clothes

It’s dark outside when they follow Dot to Pandemonium (sunset on August 25 2016 is 7:37pm)

By the time Clary is done in the City of Bones and Simon is abducted by Raphael, it’s probably well after midnight on the 26th

1x03 “Dead Man’s Party” Timeframe: August 26, ~2am to ~7am

All the events of this episode occur in the early morning hours of August 26

Simon is likely abducted sometime between midnight and 2am

In the cemetery while raiding the weapons cache, Jace and Alec confirm that their rescue mission to retrieve Simon is planned for dawn

Sunrise on August 26, 2016 is 6:18am

The sun is already up when they escape the Hotel Dumort

1x04 “Raising Hell” Timeframe: August 26 (morning) to August 27 (before dawn)

Clary, Simon et al have likely only been back from the Hotel Dumort for an hour or two when Simon wakes Clary from her dream, thus it’s still early morning

Jace tells Izzy to wake Alec and Hodge when Clary realizes Magnus Bane took her memories, quasi-confirming that Shadowhunters tend to keep night-shift hours and sleep during the day

CONTINUITY SNAFU: Even though it was after dawn when they rescued Simon from the Hotel Dumort, it is dark outside the front doors of the Institute when Simon storms out

It’s “not even 9am” when Luke offers Alaric jerky at the police station

It appears to still be daylight outside when Izzy helps Clary find something to wear

When Magnus and Elias argue over Magnus taking the meeting, it looks like it’s dark outside Magnus’s apartment. However, there is some dim, pinkish light on the far left curtain that suggests it could be around sunset and the alley outside Magnus’s balcony doors is just really shadowy

Izzy and Alec are already dressed for the rave when Alec is preparing his arrows, which suggests it’s close to 10pm

CONTINUITY SNAFU: The scene with Simon, Maureen and Elaine Lewis shows it’s clearly still light out, and Elaine says it’s dinner time, so this scene takes place around maybe 6pm. Which means it should really take place before the scene with Magnus and Elias and the scene with Alec and Izzy already dressed for the rave

If Simon didn’t return home until dinner time, but he left the Institute in the morning only an hour or two after sunrise, where was he all day?

The Downworld rave begins at 10pm, according to the flier Izzy displayed earlier in the episode. It doesn’t look terribly busy when our gang is there, suggesting the rave hasn’t been going for long. This meeting probably takes place around 11pm

The Circle probably attacks Magnus’s lair around midnight to 1am on the 27th

Depending on how long it takes Clary to draw that intricate summoning circle, the demon summoning probably takes place around 3-4am

Clary appears to be getting ready for bed when she has her vision of her mother and Valentine, but it seems to still be before sunrise, maybe around 6am

1x05 “Moo Shu to Go” Timeframe: August 27, ~6am to ~9pm

Everyone seems to be getting ready for bed when Clary seems Valentine with the portal shard necklace and Alec confiscates it

It seems reasonable to conclude the slept for part of the day, they’re all dressed in different clothing when Maryse arrives from Idris

Clary slips away around late afernoon

CONTINUITY SNAFU: Prior to the scene of Clary slipping away, Raphael confronts Simon, who is skulking outside the Hotel Dumort. It’s dark in this scene, but still daytime in the scenes before and after

Simon and Clary are abducted by Theo and Alaric before sunset, and rescued not long after sunset, putting the end of this episode at around 8:30 to 9pm

1x06 “Of Men and Angels” Timeframe: August 27 (late evening) to August 28 (early morning)

Episode picks up within an hour of the end of 1x05

Episode ends well before dawn on August 28

1x07 “Major Arcana” Timeframe: August 28 (pre-dawn to late night) 

It’s some time in the early morning, well before dawn, when Clary tells Jace, Magnus, and Luke that she knows where the Cup is

CONTINUITY SNAFU: In the first 2x18 flashback, it is established that Alec is still at Magnus’s loft after sunrise, which means he should have been in this meeting with Clary, Jace and Magnus, yet he’s nowhere to be seen. Perhaps he went to the roof to clear his head?

Obviously it’s well after dawn when Alec returns to the Institute and tells Izzy he stayed at Magnus’s all night

It’s probably mid-to-late afternoon when Elaine and Rebecca hold their “intervention” for Simon, since Elaine says she left work early

Sunset on the 28th is 7:42pm. It’s after dark when Clary, Jace, Alec and Izzy run away from the police station after finding the tarot card, so around 8pm

It’s maybe around 9-10pm when Simon returns to the Hotel Dumort and is murdered by Camille

1x08 “Bad Blood” Timeframe: August 29 (pre-dawn to near midnight)

Raphael brings Simon’s body to the Institute sometime before dawn

All events of his episode happen in one day

Simon rises as a vampire probably not long before midnight

1x09 “Rise Up” Timeframe: August 30 (midnight to before sunrise)

All events happen before sunrise on the 30th

Meliorn is arrested probably sometime not long after midnight (possibly even shortly before midnight on the 29th)

Meliorn is rescued by Jace, Clary, and Izzy before sunrise

1x10 “The World Inverted” Timeframe: August 30 (after sunrise to sometime after sunset)

Izzy returns to the Institute sometime after sunrise

It appears to be around dusk when Clary passes into the alternate dimension, however, the Seelie Glade is probably part of Faerie and time doesn’t necessarily move the same way there

Sunset on the 30th is 7:29pm. Simon visits Luke at the Jade Wolf sometime after this

Izzy’s arrest and Alec’s attempt to track Jace probably happen sometime between sunset and midnight

CONTINUITY SNAFU: It’s daylight in the alternate dimension even though it’s dark in the “real” world. There is no explanation for why time moves differently or why Clary would be inserted into a different time in the alternate dimension

1x11 “Blood Calls to Blood” Timeframe: August 31 (morning) to September 1 (late night)

It’s after sunrise when Clary and “Michael Wayland” drag an ailing Jace into the Jade Wolf (take a moment to appreciate Simon cringing away from the sunlight coming through the window)

Izzy is still wearing the same clothes as in 1x10. She's apparently incarcerated in the Head of the Institute’s office, and isn’t being allowed to change her clothes?

The Inquisitor appears to arrive around mid-morning

CONTINUITY SNAFU: The Inquisitor says the trial will commence that evening, however it doesn’t begin until the following evening

Lighting through the window suggests it’s still daylight outside when Alec tells Izzy she needs an advocate. However, it’s dark out when Alec goes to ask Magnus to be Izzy’s advocate. One possible explanation for the trial being delayed is that the Inquisitor granted time for Izzy’s advocate to work up their defense after she chooses someone to represent her?

It’s late night on the 31st when Clary and Luke scout Renwicks

It’s after sunset on September 1st when Izzy’s trial begins

It’s probably close to midnight on the 1st when Jace and Clary return to the Institute and hand over the Cup

1x12 “Malec” Timeframe: September 5 (afternoon/evening) - September 7 (late night)

This date is only a best guess. We have no indicator of how much time has passed since 1x11. It’s likely it’s only been a few days, since everyone is still researching how to wake up Jocelyn, but it seems even Izzy would need at least a few days to pull together a swanky wedding, so let’s assume it’s the better part of a week.

This episode begins before sunset on September 5, it appears to be daylight outside when Jace and Izzy talk about the wedding planning and Alec and Clary thank each other

However, it’s clearly close to sunset as it’s dark when Alec arrives at Magnus’s loft

Clary says it’s 9am (on the 6th) when Magnus is at the Institute to consult about the warlock who bespelled Jocelyn

Jace says “we leave in an hour” meaning they leave to collect Ragnor at 10am

CONTINUITY SNAFU: Even though they leave at 10am, it’s after dark when they return, though they weren’t gone more than an hour or two

Magnus is wearing the same outfit in both his scenes with ghost!Ragnor, suggesting they both happen on the same night. Those scenes bookend Alec’s bachelor party, so this is still the night of the 6th

Exterior shots of the Institute (and Simon’s dialogue earlier in the episode) indicate that the wedding takes place shortly after sunset on the 7th

Hodge absconds with the Mortal Cup late on the 7th

1x13 “Morning Star” Timeframe: September 7 (late) to September 8 (evening)

This episode picks up shortly after 1x12 ends, late at night on the 7th

Jace, Alec and Luke appear to hunt Hodge until the pre-dawn hours of the 8th

It’s after daybreak when Clary, Simon, and Izzy free Camille from the Dumort

The standoff with Valentine appears to happen late afternoon or early evening of the 8th

Jocelyn is awakened sometime after sunset on the 8th

SEASON 2A (September 9, 2016 - September 27, 2016)

2x01 “This Guilty Blood” Timeframe: September 9 (after midnight to late night)

Lydia says she’s been trying to reach the Clave for four hours, so this episode picks up soon after 1x13 ends

Simon says it’s “almost dawn” when Aldertree evicts him from the Institute. Which means Valentine is cooking spaghetti just before dawn in the previous scene???

Several daytime scenes take place but it’s after dark again when Alec visits Magnus to apologize

2x02 “A Door Into the Dark” Timeframe: September 10 (after midnight) to September 11 (late evening)

This episode begins minutes after 2x01 ends, perhaps shortly after midnight on the 10th

However, it’s unlikely the fighters in the dojo were having matches between midnight and sunrise (and also unlikely Valentine was abducting fighters within an hour or two of being shot by a crossbow) so it’s safe to assume the abductions from the dojo take place after sunset later that same day

It’s still dark out when Lydia briefs the Institute about the dojo abductions, but Lydia, Izzy, Clary, and Aldertree have all had a change of wardrobe since the beginning of the episode, confirming that most of the day has passed and they probably got some sleep somewhere in there

The light on the exterior shot of Valentine’s ship is low enough to suggest it’s around dawn the next day

Jocelyn is bringing Clary coffee, which suggests it’s morning of the 11th when Clary leaves the Institute

It’s daytime as Alec and Izzy investigate the fight club

It’s probably late afternoon/early evening when Dot abducts Clary

Sunset on September 11, 2016 was 7:09pm. It was before sunset when Jocelyn proposed her plan for Alec to track Jace, but it’s dark when Alec actually does the tracking

Since it’s unlikely Alec would have delayed putting the plan into action, this suggests it’s fairly early at night (maybe 8-9pm?) when Jace and Clary jump from Valentine’s ship

2x03 “Parabatai Lost” Timeframe: September 12 (daybreak to late night)

NOTE: September 12 is Alec’s birthday

Episode beings after sunrise the morning after Jace and Clary jump from Valentine’s ship (which means they were in the water all night?)

It’s after sunset (7:08pm) when Jace is taken to the hospital

When Maia and Luke search for Jace in the hospital, the ER doctor says he’s been there “a few hours” which means it’s probably around 10pm

Jace likely arrives to revive Alec between 11pm and midnight

Happy birthday, Alec, amirite?

2x04 “Day of Wrath” Timeframe: September 13 (sunset to midnight or shortly thereafter)

The date for this episode is only a best guess. It’s unlikely Clary would have let more than 24 hours pass without going to see Jace. It’s also unlikely Alec would be so sanguine about Jace’s fate if he’d been in the City of Bones for more than a day, but Alec has also clearly had time to rest and recuperate from his near-death experience.

It’s after sunset when Clary goes to see Jace in the City of Bones

Alec has likely spent all day resting and is not looking much better

All events of this episode appear to happen in just a few hours

2x05 “Dust and Shadows” Timeframe: September 14 (after sunset) to September 16 (after sunset)

It’s dark out on the night of the 14th when Alec is shooting arrows off the roof of the Institute and Clary goes to ask Magnus about bringing Jocelyn back

Aldertree briefs the Institute sometime after sunrise (6:38am) on the 15th and says the Rite of Mourning will be “tomorrow night”

Clary visits Iris Rouse sometime during the day of the 15th and says it’s been two days since her mother died

Simon returns to his mother’s house the evening of the 15th

Alec seeks comfort at Magnus’s loft after sunset on the 15th

Rebecca visits Simon and throws out his blood the morning of the 16th

Jace and Izzy spar and Jace tells Izzy about the mission to the Iron Sisters sometime mid-morning on the 16th

Aldertree gives Izzy the yin fen late morning or so on the 16th

Alec and Clary go to see Iris perhaps early afternoon on the 16th

It’s still daylight out on the 16th when Elaine catches Simon feeding on a rat

The Rite of Mourning ceremony takes place after sunset on the 16th

2x06 “The Iron Sisters” Timeframe: September 16 (after sunset) to September 17 (late night)

Raphael arrives to help Simon with Elaine (who is wearing the same clothes she was at the end of 2x05) after sunset on the 16th

CONTINUITY SNAFU: Prior to the scene with Raphael and Simon, there is a scene with Clary and Jace talking about the rune Clary created. However, they are both wearing different clothes than at the Rite of Mourning, as is Izzy when she arrives, and it doesn’t make sense that Clary and Jace would just be business-as-usual researching the rune only an hour or two after the Rite of Mourning for Jocelyn, which suggests that these scenes are out of order and the scene with Clary and Jace should take place maybe the morning of the 17th

Izzy is in a different outfit when she goes to ask Aldertree for a yin fen refill than she was wearing when she went to check on Clary, which suggests this is the afternoon/early evening of the 17th

(Also? Izzy? Goes? Through? A? Whole? Tin? Of? Yin Fen? In? 24? Hours? And Aldertree thinks nothing of it?)

It’s after sunset when Alec responds to Magnus’s fire message

Wherever the Adamant Citadel is located, it’s daytime there while it’s not long after sunset in New York

The rest of the episode happens the evening of the 17th, perhaps even into the post-midnight hours of the 18th

2x07 “How Are Thou Fallen” Timeframe: September 21 (evening) to September 22 (very early, pre-dawn)

The date for this episode is only a best guess. I’m trying to put as much time as possible between 2x06 and this episode, because it doesn’t seem likely that Alec and Magnus are considering sex just a day or two after their first date. Also it should take Cleophas at least a few days to reach Valentine, considering she’s traveling without access to portals, and incognito (how did she get across that volcanic plain outside the Adamant Citadel?)

There is some question whether this episode begins after sunset, or if the sky appears darker than it actually is because of the storm clouds moving in

Alec and Magnus return from their Tokyo date mid-evening, perhaps around sunset

Alec and Magnus’s date is interrupted not long after, still early enough for Magnus to feel like going out for a drink

Alec returns to Magnus’s apartment and proposes sex probably around or shortly after midnight

Clary and Jace free Ithuriel sometime in the wee small morning hours of the 22nd

2x08 “Love is a Devil” Timeframe: September 22 (after midnight) to September 24 (after sunrise)

This episode picks up within an hour or so after the end of 2x07, with Clary and Jace telling Luke about the Soul Sword and Raphael rescuing Izzy

Per the finale 2x18 flashback, Alec wakes up in Magnus’s bed sometime after sunrise and returns to the Institute by, say, mid-morning

Alec returns to Magnus a few hours later, say early afternoon, to ask Magnus to host Max’s party

Simon texts and asks Clary to meet him at 11pm, per Clary’s dialogue

Alec and Maryse argue in Maryse’s office around that same time, so 11pm to midnight on the 22nd

Max’s party starts at 8pm on the 23rd

Max’s rune ceremony is after sunrise (6:46am) on the 24th

2x09 “Bound by Blood” Timeframe: September 26 (afternoon until before midnight)

The date for this episode is only a best guess. There are some compelling arguments for it not to be too soon after 2x08, and also some compelling arguments for it to be quite soon after 2x08:

It seems like the blood oath spell would at least allow Clary a day or two to locate Madzie before upping the threat level

Enough time has passed since 2x08 for Raphael and Izzy to have settled into some sort of “relationship” (if it can be called that under those circumstances)

When taking to the homeless man in the park, Simon says Madzie was taken “a few days ago” which would indicate at least a couple days have passed since 2x08

However, Simon and Clary were determined to spend as much time together as possible, so Clary probably hasn’t been willing to sit around the Institute where it’s safe for very long. And it doesn’t seem likely that Maia, having learned that Clary can activate the Soul Sword, would wait very long before making the attempt on her life.

So it’s anyone’s guess. I’m going to go with two days since the end of 2x08, though.

Iris’s spell seems to take effect maybe mid-afternoon

It's still daytime when Clary and Jace arrive at Magnus’s loft to ask about her arm

It’s not yet sunset when Maia attacks Clary but it gets dark shortly thereafter when Maia explains herself to Luke

The rest of this episode takes place over the next few hours, up to perhaps around midnight

2x10 “By the Light of Dawn” Timeframe: September 27 (midnight to after sunrise)

This episode begins immediately after 2x09 ends

It ends shortly after sunrise the morning of the 27th

SEASON 2B (September 28, 2016 to October 15, 2016)

2x11 “Mea Maxima Culpa” Timeframe: September 28 (before dawn) to September 29 (evening) 

The date for this episode is only a best guess. There are no hard and fast indicators of how long has passed since 2x10, but we have a couple of clues (and a few causes for confusion.) Aldertree has been sent back to Idris to face reprimand (one presumes for leaving the Institute vulnerable to Valentine's attack?) Assuming this is true and not a lie like the one about the Soul Sword, at least a day or two has passed, because it would take a while for messages to pass back and forth, for the decision to be made to recall Aldertree, and for Aldertree to return. However, I doubt Imogen Herondale would wait too long before interrogating Valentine, so we may assume she arrives within a day or two of Valentine's capture.

It’s dark when Alec and Jace are sparring in the courtyard. Assuming they still work the night shift, it could be before dawn and they’re unwinding after patrol the morning of the 28th

The low light indicates it’s either sunrise or sunset when Clary and Simon are on the bench. While I’m not sure a hot dog vendor (in the background) would be out and about right at daybreak, I’m going with sunrise because they appear to be looking across the river at Manhattan, which means they’re probably in Brooklyn facing west, and the sun is behind them in the east.

Azazel attacks the bar after dark that night

Alec tends to Izzy the next morning (the 29th)

CONTINUITY SNAFU: The scene immediately following this is Luke confronting Russell in the Jade Wolf, and then Luke gets a call about Azazel's massacre in the bar. If Luke doesn't find out about it until after Alec, who contacted Alec?

CONTINUITY SNAFU CONTINUED: When Alec is notified he clearly says "there was a demon attack" and yet when Clary is looking at the bodies, she says "this looks like a demon attack" as though that is new information (like, why else would they have been called in?) Oh, Michael Reisz. I love you dearly and with all my heart for giving us 1x12, but you are really not a very good writer

(POSSIBLE) CONTINUITY SNAFU: It’s clearly still daylight when Simon and Maia talk in the bar, but the earlier scene with Izzy encountering Azazel in the alley outside the vamp lair made it look like it was after dark. Is the alley underground? Is it under a highway somewhere that doesn’t allow daylight to get in? Demons don’t seem to like daylight, so how is Azazel out and about if it’s not dark?

It appears to be before sunset when Alec visits Magnus to ask about the demon and encounters Raphael

YET ANOTHER CONTINUITY SNAFU: Raphael says Izzy “just” came by the Dumort, but she came by in the morning as he was getting ready for coffin bed and now it’s nearly sunset

When Alec returns to the Institute to tell them Azazel may have Izzy, Clary says the Inquisitor is in a meeting with the Alicante Council. Which I guess means the Alicante Council holds meeting in the middle of the night in Idris, because 6pm New York time would be about 11pm Idris time.

Best guess is the attempt to summon Azazel takes place around 8-9pm

2x12 “You Are Not Your Own” Timeframe: September 29 (late evening) to September 30 (evening)

This episode picks up maybe an hour or so after 2x11 ends, assuming Valentine-in-Magnus’s-Body doesn’t spend more than an hour wandering around looking for Magnus’s loft

Izzy returns to the Institute with Sebastian in tow after sunrise the next morning

Izzy and Simon “visit” Rosa Santiago sometime that afternoon

CONTINUITY SNAFU: Izzy tells Rosa she and Raphael visited her for Bingo night last week, but Izzy stopped seeing Raphael only a few days ago, only hours after learning about Rosa’s existence. So that’s not possible

The body swap is undone sometime after sunset on the 30th

2x13 “Those of Demon Blood” Timeframe: October 3 (late evening) to October 5 (shortly after midnight)

The date for this episode is only a best guess. The flier Clary creates for Simon’s show says “Midnight Tuesday” which would have to mean Tuesday, October 4 because midnight on October 11 would be after the start of Yom Kippur and Simon wouldn’t be able to have a show that night (and also there wouldn’t be time for 2x14 and 2x15 to happen before 2x16, which takes place on October 12.)

Honestly the timeline for this episode is a bit of a mess. It would make a lot more sense if there was a day between solving the murder mystery with Kaelie and Simon’s show, but Magnus’s lack of a costume change indicates it all happens on the same night.

Clary tells Simon about his upcoming show sometime the evening of October 3. Which seems pretty sketchy to me “Hey, baby, I booked you a show for...24 hours from now. Have fun getting ready for that!”

Maia is wearing Costume #1

Clary and Simon find the first body shortly thereafter

Luke is pulled in for questioning by the Inquisitor maybe around midnight or shortly thereafter

The second body is found while Luke is offering his DNA

After daybreak, the Inquisitor addresses the Institute and tells them she’s leaving Jace in charge when she goes

Jace tells them to collect DNA from their friends the morning of the 4th

Alec does to see Magnus for a DNA sample around mid-morning

Apparently Clary decides to take an art class all day, however, because she doesn’t ask Simon for his DNA sample until after the sun goes down (6:31pm)

CONTINUITY SNAFU: Sometime between 6:30 and midnight, Simon refuses his DNA, rescues Clary, gets arrested, gets released, goes home, changes his clothes, and sets up for his show at the Hunter’s Moon

Maia fights Jace over the tracking chip maybe around 8:30pm or so?

Maia’s arrested around 9:30pm then (the Inquisitor says she attacked Jace an hour ago)

When she’s arrested, Maia says she was walking home from work

CONTINUITY SNAFU: Yet at midnight, only a couple hours later, she’s back at work, wearing a different outfit

Izzy saves Max, kills the bad guy, reports back to the Institute, changes her clothes, and head out to catch Simon’s show as well

Simon’s show takes place at midnight (end of Tuesday the 4th/beginning of Wednesday the 5th)

2x14 “The Fair Folk” Timeframe: October 9 (morning through evening)

The date for this episode is only a best guess. The dialogue is somewhat misleading when Jace claims Alec has been in charge for a week, because there’s no possible way it can be a full week since 2x13. Best guess is 5 days since 2x13.

The opening scene with Jace at the piano is misleading; Jace is wearing the same clothes that he was in 2x13 when he hooked up with Maia in the alley, and from the dialogue we’re meant to assume he just got back from that hookup, but since he later says Alec has been in charge for a week, he and Maia have hooked up more than once

It’s after sunrise when Alec briefs the Institute and sends Jace and Clary on their mission to the Seelie Court

It’s after sunset when the Downworld cabinet begins, however, as established both by the scene with Luke getting the fire message at the Jade Wolf and by the fact that Raphael is in attendance

2x15 “A Problem of Memory” Timeframe: October 10 (after midnight) to October 11 (2am)

Raphael says in this episode that the bleeder den doesn’t open until midnight, which means the scene where Simon and Quinn go to the bleeder den takes place after midnight, a few hours after the events of 2x14

While it seems unlikely Simon would go out to the Hunters Moon so soon after 2x14, he did just originally intend to get some blood to go, so he was either hungry or intending to drink his sorrows away while moping in private; he didn’t intend to go out and get wild

Alec wakes alone sometime after sunrise

Again, because the bleeder den doesn’t open until midnight, it’s sometime after midnight when Simon confronts Quinn

Magnus tells Alec about his past sometime between midnight and 2am

(POSSIBLE) CONTINUITY SNAFU: While briefing her team earlier, Izzy says Valentine’s transfer is set for 2am, which would be 7am Idris time, but it’s already after sunrise in Idris when they arrive, and sunrise shouldn’t have been until after 7:30am if Idris is in the same time zone as Zürich, Switzerland

2x16 “Day of Atonement” Timeframe: October 12 (morning to evening)

Simon is fasting when Maia comes to visit him, which means it’s October 12, as Yom Kippur began at sunset on October 11

Simon and Maia go to dinner with his family after sunset on the 12th, which means the end of Yom Kippur

All the events of this episode take place from the morning of the 12th to the evening of the 12th

2x17 “A Dark Reflection” Timeframe: October 13 (morning to late night)

Alec tells Max he’s approved to begin going on missions the morning of the 13th

Izzy confronts Alec about Max later that morning

Jonathan attacks Elliot Nourse sometime after sunset (which is 6:17pm on the 13th)

Alec is "a few hours" late for dinner (which was probably scheduled for 6 or 7pm) thus the dinner date scene should probably actually take place around 9-10 pm. However, given how much else happens in this episode and the fact that most of 2x18 takes place before sunrise the next day it makes more sense for the dinner date scene to happen earlier

Magnus confronts Alec about withholding the information about the Soul Sword an hour or two after their dinner date

CONTINUITY SNAFU: According to their website, the last paddleboat rental at Prospect Park goes out two hours before to sunset, which means Simon and Maia are S.O.L. Oops

Max confronts Jonathan in Alec’s office perhaps around 11pm to midnight

2x18 “Awake, Arise, or Be Forever Fallen” Timeframe: October 14 (midnight to after sunrise)

Izzy finds Max unconscious in her room perhaps sometime after midnight

Alec goes to Magnus’s loft to ask for his help before sunrise

Exterior shots establish that Jonathan attacks the Elite Guardsmen in the courtyard right around sunrise

It’s still quite early in the morning when Clary reveals Jonathan and Magnus breaks up with Alec

2x19 “Hail and Farewell” Timeframe: October 14 (morning to evening)

Jonathan has his meltdown while it’s still early morning

Clary, Jace and Izzy find Sebastian Verlac’s body in Jonathan’s apartment perhaps mid-morning

While it doesn’t look like it’s daylight outside Alec’s office when he briefs the Inquisitor about the Mirror, it’s nighttime in Idris, which suggests it must be afternoon in New York

The meeting with the Downworld Council takes place late morning or early afternoon

The lighting when Raphael and Izzy talk suggests it’s getting close to sunset, but there are several more outside scenes that take place in the daylight afterward

It’s just before sunset when Valentine attacks the funeral to make the Forsaken

It’s after sunset when Clary, Izzy, Alec, and Jace track Jonathan to the cemetery and “kill” him

Valentine strikes his deal with the Seelie Queen late that night

2x20 “Beside Still Water” Timeframe: October 15 (sunrise to late night)

This episode begins after sunrise with Jonathan washing up on the beach and opening the rift to Edom

Alec et al confront the dragon over Manhattan perhaps mid-morning

Alec asks for Magnus’s help closing the rift in the late morning

Magnus, Alec, and Izzy close the rift around noon

It's just after sunset in Alicante (1pm New York time) when Jace and Clary escape and kill Consul Malachi and his headsman

It’s maybe 2:30-3pm New York time when Valentine summons Raziel

I have my doubts that they’d be able to report to the Inquisitor in Alicante that they killed the Consul and un-summoned the angel and still make it back to New York in time to attend a party that night, HOWEVER the characters in the party clearly state a number of times that it’s still the same day, I so guess they managed it

And there you have it. Stay tuned for Season 3a!

Please, if you’ve enjoyed my fic or meta or vids, consider checking out some of my books, or buying me a cup of coffee!

[hikaru9]

Shadowhunters 2x18 - Magnus’s walls

Everyone is having a “great” time, enjoying the beautiful flashbacks, how Malec is going so far in such a short time, how their love is pure even if circumstances are terrible, but I am probably the only one feeling very scarred and terribly sad. Absolutely no criticism to the show, because the episode was FANTASTIC. I’m really talking about the emotional journey it put me through so, let me vent it out a bit, because as many as you, I’m a mess. I’m sorry it’s going to sound terribly sad.

The situation

As I said in my previous commentary on episode 2x17, the problems between them were “healthy angst” kind of issues, that would help them see the differences between them, face it all and be better for each other. I was expecting things to get even more meaningful because of the teasers and spoilers we had so I thought I was prepared, but I wasn’t.

The flashbacks

The flashbacks were extremely important. However, let me tell you something most people won’t agree with: I was a bit wary of them (but I was still open to them, mind you, and I’d never judge before seeing them). I was one of the few people who enjoyed 2x07 IMMENSELY; I thought it was a beautiful, well done episode that came in full circle. To understand it, we have to sit through it and grab all the tiny details that the writers put out, so that the end would make even more sense. I never saw the problem with consent, since I absolutely understood what Magnus was saying, how afraid he was that Alec would “go” the morning after and thus that he was “using” him for experience. Nonetheless, I ABSOLUTELY understand people who didn’t enjoy it as much as I did, and their arguments and point of view make sense. I respect their opinions. Still, 2x07 includes all my favourite Malec moments: the date, the Omamori (my favourite moment ever), the smooch attacks, their first time. After saying that, however, I am infinitely grateful for these flashback. I’m so glad they created them and put them in this episode, in THIS way, because they fit perfectly and made us understand so much more, so I was scared for nothing. I ALWAYS wanted to know what happened during that “infamous” night between 1x06 and 1x07: what did they talk about? How was Alec behaving? And Magnus? How did they feel after talking about everything and nothing, after drinking and being in each other’s company for so many hours? And here I have it, that tiny little moment in the morning after. I don’t know if you notice, but it was such a wink to the “Bane Chronicles”: Alec sleeping on the couch after a “mission”, waking up to Magnus making coffee (note: in the “Bane Chronicles” he would do that many times, and it’s Magnus who would wake up with the smell of coffee in the air and Alec being busy in his kitchen). I loved it. I loved seeing the difference between season 1!Alec and season 2!Alec, how insecure he was, how everything was new, how he was still ashamed of what he felt and what he was doing, how he almost smiled and was genuinely surprised by Magnus when he stopped thinking about all those insecurities and how he would crash all his emotions the moment he started overthinking. I loved how Magnus was tiptoeing around him as well, trying to make Alec feel comfortable but still trying to flirt as well; the surprise he showed everytime Alec said something he didn’t expect. Season 1 gifted us of so many feelings.

And then the night between 2x07 and 2x08 happened. Everything was so well done but what I am immensely thankful for is that they didn’t change the “tone” of 2x07. It wasn’t presented as “here, we fixed what you didn’t like it”, it was a natural following of everything the built in that episode: them entering their room with their lips locked, both being extremely greedy of each others’ touches, the bed gloriousness, Magnus “losing” control. THAT scene, above it all, was so well done. Magnus continued to being completely immersed in his feelings and it showed through his confused way of speaking (it was the SAME in 2x07 when he tried to explain to Alec he was afraid of losing him). It was so important for him to be accepted by Alec after seeing his warlock’s marks during such an intimate moment, even more after we saw what happened with his family.

Magnus

Here I am, being terrible. I know the WHOLE episode was beautiful and I know it was absolutely well done but it destroyed me seeing Magnus like this. It was so sad. The PURPOSE of the flashbacks was to remind Magnus what he had, and what he could lose if he accepted the Seelie Queen’s offer. And throughout the episode, what we see is Magnus putting back the walls around his heart. It was REALLY painful to watch, as a Magnus fan. It was AMAZINGLY well done and Harry Shum Jr. remains a BLESSING for this fandom, for me as a huge Magnus fan and for everyone in this show. It’s unbelievable how he can deliever so much without speaking. You can see him hardening his heart in those tiny little moments before and after the flashbacks: there, on that couch where Alec stayed with him after all the mess in 2x12; there, when he holds the Omamori (I’m gonna meta the hell out of it one day) and looks out at that rainy sky; there, at the Institute, holding Alec’s hand; there, when he goes out from the infirmary, looking at that cursed flower again, missing Alec and having to go through everything alone. Yes, alone. That’s one of the things that made me EXTREMELY sad. He was ALONE throughout the episode. Not even Max nor Bat, who were physically wounded, were alone. He was the only one; everyone else had someone by their sides. He was alone at home, and NO ONE checked on him but Alec (who needed him both physically and emotionally for the terrible Max’s situation); he was alone at the institute as well, even if surrounded by the Lightwoods, because NO ONE but ALEC talked to him. He was alone going through his memories and his emotions, no one to talk to, no one there to ask him if he was okay, as if everyone was expecting him to BE okay, since he’s immortal, powerful and the High Warlock of Brooklyn (yes, those are the things EVERYONE and Alec included, at first, thought about him). And that’s another terrible aspects of it all. He’s so conflicted about the whole situation with the Seelie Queen because his emotional life doesn’t get along with what the Downworlders and the Shadow World expect him to do. People expect him to be a leader, to protect the warlocks and the Downworlders in general, to destroy the possible menace, to bring peace. And Alec is RIGHT, they can work together to make them get along, to make it possible, but I think he feels the pressure of it all, and seeing how the misunderstandings between him and Alec and the problems the Clave is causing make Magnus vulnerable to be nudged towards duty. He’s doing what season 1!Alec was doing, and it’s understandable, even more if you think about how afraid he was and is. At this point, after 7 weeks of knowing each other and falling in love, he probably knows Alec is THE ONE. And we know how scary it is for Magnus, after all the lovers he lost, after all the people who just used him and left him alone. Remember who Magnus Bane is, and how he was shaped to be like that. After 400 years of experiencing loss, starting from his own mother and family, to all those lovers, who would either judge him, leave him for someone else, continue their lives, die on him, saying he wasn’t enough, saying he was too much; after what he went through with the torture in Valentine’s body; after finding someone who loves him and he can trust, it’s really easy to see why he’s trying to hide his true self, and put those walls around his heart again.

Alec

I have no words to express how proud I am of Alec. During this episode he has shown once again how brave and passionate he is. He’s the perfect person for Magnus, from the way he holds him and touches him, to the things he says to him. He’s brave also for saying sorry every time he understands he made a mistake; for the way he ALWAYS tries to make it work, TOGETHER, and being stronger than before. I love him and Malec forever.

Having said all that, as @alyxhavok wisely stated: let’s be patient, and wait for the Alliance rune and for Catarina (who may do something like in book 6, talking to Magnus about how Alec is important for him and stop fooling around). And a HUGE shout out to the cast, writers and directors, who did an amazing job not only with Malec, in this episode, but also with everything else.

[thewaywedo33]

Wynonna Earp 2x07 Thoughts and Faves

There seems to be something special about a Wynonna Earp episode seven. Much like 1x07, this episode feels like a point in the season where everything starts to gel together and hurdle forward at a rapidly increasing pace.  Also, Wynhaught goodness was the cornerstone of this episode, much like last year.  Version 2.0 was awesome, to say the least. Shall we dig in?

In the opening scene Wynonna realizes Mercedes and Beth are connected to the Widows. I’m glad we’re moving into the cat and mouse stage between protagonist and antagonist. It was a delicious tension throughout Season 1 with Bobo, knowing he’s the bad guy, but having to wait for him to make a mistake, or, as it turned out, make his big diabolical move. With five episodes left in the season, I feel like we’re exactly where we need to be.

The opening scene cemented a particular concept for me.  We wear the biggest blinders concerning the people we love.  Wynonna realizes Mercedes is different almost immediately, knows something is off about her in a bad way. Yet, even when all the signs were there, it took her months to acknowledge something was off with Waverly.  

After everything with Willa, it is understandable for Wynonna to have a particular desperation and need for Waverly to be okay, but she ignored major red flags. Waverly is a blind spot of sorts for her. We all joke about Wynonna being oblivious, but I don’t actually think it’s the case most of the time. We see her pick up on the changes with Mercedes right away.  Her quick wit and constant commentary is actually indicative of someone who’s well aware of the reality going on around her. The fact that she has blinders on when it comes to her own family (let’s face it, she did it with Willa too), stands out to me, and is extremely human and relatable.

Doc seemed somewhat frail this entire episode, and I’m not just talking about the obvious coughing in the homestead. Something about his voice and movements seemed off and lacking their usual lively charm. I know he’s got a few things going on with the baby situation, but it felt like very specific choices were made to show his health, and immortality, fading.  In a show like Wynonna Earp, I tend to assume scenes exist for a reason, and Doc’s car struggling to start seems like a metaphor.  “Cursed piece of junk” applies to both the car and to himself.  I’m fully expecting for the gang to have to figure out a way to save him from the death he’s skirted for multiple lifetimes now.

One might assume I’ve run out of things to say about Wynonna and Nicole at this point, but alas, I have not.  Their friendship is a slow build, and I appreciate the relationship development between them as much as the one between Nicole and Waverly.

Underrated moment of the episode: The murder callback to season 1.  In 1x07 Wynonna suggested they murder pancakes, in 2x07 she wants to murder science.  I’m a sucker for little touches like that.

It took two seconds for Wynonna to give in to Nicole when she asks who Wynonna thinks she’d rather piss off, her, or Waverly?  No one wants to deal with Waverly’s wrath. Special shout out to the thing Kat Barrell does with her face when she says “or your sister?”  Actually, special shout out to everything Kat Barrell does in this episode.  Her comedic timing is so good, and when played off Melanie’s timing, we get tight, hilarious scenes.

I love the way Wynonna refers to Nicole as “Officer Haught” when she calls her naïve. She’s starting to differentiate between the personality aspects she doesn’t understand/don’t mesh with her own, and the person Nicole is as a whole, who is someone Wynonna actually likes and respects.

And can we talk about how protective Nicole is of Wynonna now?  Sure, some of it is due to her being Waverly’s sister, but mostly, Nicole is just a solid, upstanding person who wants to protect of those she cares about.  Nicole knows she can’t defeat Revenants on her own, yet she tells Wynonna to jet when the danger becomes apparent, all the while planning to stay and get the saliva sample from Jonas herself.   Talk about going towards the danger.  Not to mention, she nearly gives herself alcohol poisoning to help Wynonna maintain her cover.

Then we get the wonderful face she makes when Jonas asks if the baby is his and she tells him no, only to have Wynonna tell him “maybe”.  Nicole is so upset. She doesn’t want Wynonna putting herself in any more danger than she has to, just like with Waverly.  I’ll never stop yelling about the two of them and their relationship dynamic, FYI.

I feel a bait and switch coming on, but not necessarily in the traditional sense. We have not one, but two instances in this episode of the camera/dialogue hinting that Waverly is the product of a demon and human.  Look, I think there have been too many comments and references for Waverly to actually be the product of both Ward and Mama Earp, but I think there’s something else at play too.  It’s weird to me how the camera pans to Nicole in the execution scene, right after showing Waverly, when Jonas says “Rumor is it’s happened before.”  It happens exactly when Wynonna says “That’s the problem with rumors, people tend to believe them.” Why?  I don’t know, but it’s niggling at the back of my brain. Might be a red herring, might be something else.  Either way, I love that this show makes me think about things this hard.

I’m glad Waverly finally shared her secret with Wynonna. They need to get to the bottom of this together.  They’re better, and stronger, when they have each other’s backs. The proof of it is all over this episode.  Waverly asking Nicole to stay with Wynonna so she’s not alone; Wynonna looking at Waverly before she shoots Jonas to get her verdict on the matter, and proceeding once she gets the little nod; “Ours” (catch me crying forever over that).  The Earp sister relationship is the lifeblood of this show, and it won’t matter a single iota if they don’t share both of the same parents.  The family you choose (related by blood or otherwise), is always going to be a more potent bond than one you have no say in.

I can’t finish this without mentioning the boys, because their B plot and interactions were delightful. I love the way Jeremy feels like the hapless little brother Doc and Dolls have to band together to protect (from others, and from himself).  And the Doc/Dolls beer share at the end was exactly what I want from their relationship. Much like Wynonna/Nicole, I think Doc and Dolls work best when they have a mutual respect and admiration underlying their differences and conflicts.

Miscellaneous Scrap Thoughts and Fave Lines:

-There were two fantastic moments concerning judgement in this episode.  First with the doctor, who I want to wrap up and ensure no harm comes to after seeing what happened to the blacksmith last year.  How important and amazing was her scene with Wynonna?  “I’m not here to judge.”  The care they are taking with the pregnancy storyline, while still staying true to the essence of the show, is astounding. 

I also really liked Wynonna and Nicole’s interaction at the strip club.  Wynonna may have joked “There’s so much more to judge”, but I think after Nicole hears why Wynonna used to work there, her judgement is over.  At the very least, I think she now understands there’s a myriad of reasons one might have for working in such an establishment, and making assumptions is not the way to go.

-“He must have roofied the Pinot Grigio.” – Why do I find this line so funny?  I don’t think it works as well if she says any other wine.

-“Would you like me to draw you a diagram?  Because I will.” – Wynonna.  And then, Nicole actually does a diagram of sorts to Waverly, outside the strip club, and we have a perfect full circle moment.

-I feel for Jeremy and his Doc crush. “Not that I blame him for anything.” Oh sweetie, that is the worst kind of crush to have.  No one is infallible.

-I don’t think Nicole is actually gluten-free. There is no way an establishment like PussyWillows carries gluten-free beer, and Nicole was pretty much mainlining it.

-When Waverly cries, I cry, and I assume everyone else does too. I’m preparing my tear ducts for the rest of the season.

-Dolls fanboying over Bass Reeves is amazing.  I love when we get to see hints of his lighter side.

And hey, how about that Season 3 renewal?!  I can’t tell you how much it means to me that we aren’t done with this magical show in five episodes.

I started watching the show after the first two episodes aired, because someone tweeted the magical words ‘badass sister relationship’, which is my weakness, (probably because I’m one of three girls, we’re all horribly sarcastic, our childhood dynamics mirror the shows’ more than I care to admit, but I would go to hell in a handbasket for either one of them), and it's one of the best decisions I've ever made in my life.

Everything about Wynonna Earp is quality, from the cast, to Emily Andras, to the Earper fandom, to the wonderful talent we have producing podcasts, writing recaps and conducting interviews each week.  Thank unicorn we get another season.  But hey, I want more, so let’s get started on that Season 4 renewal push!

This show has such a potent grasp on my heart, and I don’t know that it will ever let go.  I’m okay with that.

[lost-n-stereo]

A/N: After 1x07 I typed out a quick little text post (which you can read here) and it inspired me to make it a full-fledged fic about Jughead moving in with Fred & Archie. Hopefully this will help pass a little time until the new episode. Almost 5k words of Bughead fluff. Enjoy!

just looking for something (something like home)

He moves in with the Andrews men early on a Saturday morning.

Not that he could really call it moving in considering his entire life fits into a backpack but at least he’s got a room to call his own.

The basement, to be exact.

Fred sets up a cot in the corner, near boxes of Christmas decorations (he’s pretty sure those haven’t been touched since Archie’s mom left) and old rusty tools and lawn equipment. He sets his backpack on a rickety tool bench but doesn’t move to unpack.

“Sorry it’s so cold down here,” Fred is saying as he throws a fitted flannel sheet over the cot’s mattress. “We’ll get you a space heater or something before winter comes.”

“Alright,” Jughead says although he’s not really paying attention. It’s not that he’s not grateful for Fred’s generosity, he is but he can’t help but think about his dad at home alone. Probably drunk, even though he promised to get his act together.

Just a month, maybe two.

Not a chance in hell.

Jughead is glad Archie is at football practice because there’s a question on the tip of his tongue that he’s a little embarrassed to ask.

“Just curious,” he starts but his voice shakes a little and his hands are sweating. He runs them down the front of his pants and clears his throat. “Is there a uh… um…a girl policy?”

Judging from Fred’s expression he’s just as surprised Jughead asked as he is.

“A girl policy,” Fred repeats. “Well, Archie has girls over but they usually keep the door open. And no sleepovers.”

Jughead laughs and holds up his hands. “Yeah, of course. That’s not really what I was talking about. More just…in general.”

Fred gives him a knowing smile and it makes him want to melt into the hard concrete floor under his feet.

“Betty is more than welcome in this house whenever she wants. She always has been and that won’t change just because you’re dating.”

Dating.

What a foreign concept. It’s something he’s still getting used to, if he’s being honest. He’s never had a real girlfriend before and he’s not even sure he knows how to be a boyfriend.

Then again, Betty kissed him after he walked her home so he’s hoping that means he’s doing alright so far.

“Great,” he says a little too enthusiastically and he blushes a little when Fred grins. “Thanks, I mean. Betty is…”

“A great girl,” Fred finishes and Jughead nods. “You’re a lucky guy, Jug.”

He just laughs and shakes his head because that is a statement that is so unfairly untrue that if he didn’t laugh about it he’d probably cry.

***

A tapping noise wakes him up and he’s immediately uneasy.

The room is pitch black and unfamiliar. He takes a breath to calm his racing heart once he realizes that he’s just in the Andrews’ basement.

You’d think after a week he’d be used to it but that’s what happens when you’re basically homeless.

You try not to get used to any place because the fear of losing it is too great.

The tapping happens again and his phone lights up with a text at almost the same exact time. Betty’s smiling face is looking up at him from the screen and he sees that it’s almost three in the morning.

Open your window.

He chuckles and gets up, his pajama pants riding low on his hips as he steps over to the low window that faces the Andrews’ front yard.

Betty is kneeling next to it, using her phone as a flashlight, and Jughead wants to laugh and scold her at the same time.

So that’s exactly what he does.

“Elizabeth Cooper, you little minx,” he says with a faux stern voice when he opens the window. “Why are you outside in the middle of the night? You know it’s not safe.”

Betty rolls her eyes and moves so her face is half in the window. She’s close enough to kiss so he does, just a little peck because he finds it impossible to not kiss her whenever they are together.

“That’s why I’m outside,” she says with a smile when he pulls away and he wants to tell her to go back home where it’s safe but also he missed her today. She was busy with cheerleading practice and they only saw each other for brief moments at school.

Jughead turns around to check the stairs, knowing that Fred and Archie are both upstairs asleep but he’s only been here a few days and the last thing he wants to do is piss anyone off.

“I’d invite you inside but I don’t think Mr. Andrews would think too highly of me if I snuck the girl next door into his basement.”

His voice is teasing but he knows that she can read behind the lines of what he’s saying.

This home is temporary and I can’t screw it up.

Betty nods and leans inside again. “I couldn’t sleep,” she admits. “I thought maybe seeing you would…”

He cocks his head and smiles. “Would what?”

“Calm me.”

His heart does something funny in his chest and he feels warm all over despite the fact that he’s not wearing a shirt or his beanie, and there’s a cool wind coming through the open window.

“I calm you?” The idea that he could calm someone else is a little unnerving considering the fact that he hardly ever feels calm about anything. Ever.

She smiles sweetly at him and nods. “You do, yeah. And I think after one more kiss I might just be able to fall asleep.”

“Well in that case.” He grins and tugs her down so her face is level with his and he kisses her softly. “Who am I to deny you a good night’s rest?”

He steals one more kiss because he can and she sighs happily before pulling herself out of the window.

“Goodnight, Juggie.”

He watches her walk across the lawn and sneak back into her house, making sure she’s safely inside before closing the window.

The taste of her candy lip gloss is still on his lips when he lays back down.

“Night, Betty.”

***

Jellybean calls him one night when he’s writing an article for the B&G, some puff piece that Betty asked him to write and if it wasn’t for the stack of burgers she promised he probably would have said no, girlfriend or not.

“Hello, brother.”

He laughs at JB’s formal greeting. “Hello, sister. To what do I owe the pleasure of this call?”

“I need advice,” she sighs and he rolls his eyes because she’s 10. What kind of advice does a 10 year old need.

“Hit me,” he tells her, turning off his laptop so he can give her his full attention.

There are only three women in the world he cares about and she’s at the very top of the list. If there’s a way he can help her with something, she’s his number one priority.

“Well there’s this boy…”

He groans. “Jellybean.”

“Hey! I said to call me JB, remember? I’m not a baby anymore, Jug.”

“I know,” he laughs. “But I’m really not the person to be asking when it comes to boys. Why don’t you just ask mom?”

JB sighs and his heart constricts, knowing the reason before she even says it. “She’s always busy, Juggie. With work and now classes. She’s hardly ever home.”

Jughead grips his phone in his hand, his anger building as he thinks about his baby sister home alone.

“And you? What do you do when she’s not there?”

He can practically hear her shrug. “I dunno, play video games. Play fetch with Hot Dog. Normal stuff.”

“Alone? Or does someone come watch you.”

When she hesitates he’s afraid he’s going to break his phone from gripping it so hard. “Not always. Sometimes Mrs. Adams stays with me after school or on the weekends.”

“Damn it,” he says without meaning to and he ignores JB’s gasp at his use of a swear word. The girl can listen to old school classic rock all day long but the second you say damn or shit she’s losing her mind. “I can’t help you with the boy stuff, JB, but I think I know someone who can.”

He tells her he’ll call her back and without putting his phone down he types in the only number he knows by heart.

“Juggie.”

Betty’s sweet voice drifts through the phone and into his ear.

“Hey, I need a favor.”

She laughs. “I’m all ears.”

He explains JB’s situation, boy trouble that she can’t talk to their mom about, and Betty immediately asks for her phone number.

“Thank you,” he says, his voice cracking a little because damn this girl and her ability to fix problems he didn’t even know he had.

“Of course, Jug. I’ll call her right now.”

A little over an hour later his phone lights up with a text from his sister.

Thank u!!! Betty is the best. I love her soooo much!

He chuckles as he thumbs in a response but really there’s only one thing on repeat in his mind.

Me too, kid. Me too.

***

The investigation goes cold for a couple weeks.

Betty spends a lot of her time at Veronica’s with Polly and although Jughead is welcome there he tends to stay away because there’s only so much baby talk he can take before he wants to take a rattle and shove it through his ear.

Archie asks him on a Wednesday if he wants to go camping over the weekend.

“It’s November,” Jughead deadpans. “Isn’t it too cold for camping?”

Archie just shrugs. “Aren’t you sick of just sitting around all the time? Let’s go do something fun for once.”

He agrees because apparently he’s agreeable now and when he tells Betty at lunch that he’ll be gone all weekend she actually beams.

“Wow,” he snickers. “Don’t be so sad about me leaving, Betts.”

Betty rolls his eyes and kisses his cheek. He tries to pretend he doesn’t see Archie look away but it’s hard when his best friend is so blatantly obvious about it.

“I’m not happy that you’re leaving for the weekend. I’m happy that you’re doing something for yourself. You never get to have fun, Juggie. This will be good for you.” She looks over at Archie and then back at him. “Good for both of you.”

He knows what she’s saying without her actually having to say it. Things have been tense for the past few weeks and that’s putting it mildly. While Archie isn’t openly against them dating he’s not exactly for it either. So far it hasn’t started any fights but Jughead can feel it brewing, like a living thing under the surface, ready to pop up and rear its ugly head to tear everything apart.

Or maybe he’s just being dramatic. It’s a very good possibility.

“You’re right,” he says and she nods as if to say Duh and it makes him chuckle. He stands up and drops a kiss on her nose.

“Who wants more tacos?”

***

Three days later he’s freezing his ass off in the middle of the woods with nothing but a cheap sleeping bag and a fire to keep him warm.

“Whose idea was this again?” Archie’s teeth are chattering as he wraps a wool blanket around him in front of the fire.

“Yours, dumbass.” Jughead ducks when Archie throws a marshmallow at his head. “And here I thought your basement was cold.”

Archie frowns as he roasts a hot dog over the open fire. “Yeah, sorry about that. My dad’s supposed to…”

“Get me a heater, I know.”

Archie nods and Jughead hates the weird tension between the two of them.

“Hey Arch? Are we, you know, okay?”

He feels like an idiot for asking as soon as the words are out of his mouth but honestly it needed to be asked. And he really does hope that they are.

“What? Yeah, of course.” Archie turns the hot dog over when one side blackens. “I mean, I was a little freaked out at first when you and Betty started…”

“Yeah, I know.” He thinks back to the dream he had weeks ago, his best friend walking into a kitchen with a knife in his back, and it makes him shudder. “I just don’t want you to think that I’m choosing her over you or that she’s choosing me over you because you know that’s not the case, right?”

His friend is quiet, just staring at that damn blackened hot dog, and Jughead is about to snap his fingers in front of Archie’s face to get his attention when he looks up and smiles.

“Obviously, yes I know. We’re all good, Jug.”

Archie smiles again, good-natured as always, but it doesn’t reach his eyes and Jughead is too much of a coward to ask him why.

***

“So there’s a dance coming up.”

Betty is lying on her bed doing homework and she looks over at him with a small smile playing across her pink lips. “So I’ve heard.”

He clears his throat, still nervous even though they have been together for a good amount of time now. Something about her makes him feel off kilter even though the very essence of her completely centers him.

It’s bizarre and something that he’s not sure he’ll ever understand but he doesn’t hate it at all.

“Well, I was wondering if you wanted to go and if you do, you know. Would you want to go with me?”

His words are rushed and unsure. Maybe it’s a given that couples do these things together without having to ask but he’s never been one half of a couple, hell he’d never even used the word couple until a few months ago and he honestly has no idea how any of this couple stuff works.

“I figured we’d go together,” Betty says, getting up off the bed and leaning one hip against her desk, where he was trying and failing to do calculus because all he could think about was asking her to this damn dance.

“Yeah?”

She laughs quietly and nods. “But thank you for asking. That’s incredibly sweet and yes. I would love to go to the winter dance with you, Jughead.”

It makes him blush, which he despises because he’s supposed to be cooler than this. Betty brings out this other side to him, a softer side, but instead of it making him feel weak he just feels stronger. More alive.

“Cool,” he says because he doesn’t have a better word. She doesn’t seem to mind, just tilts her head down for a kiss that he gladly reciprocates. “It’s a date.”

***

Winter comes without warning.

One day they can go outside without heavy coats or umbrellas and the next they are searching their closets for snow boots and beanies.

Luckily he’s always wearing one of those so he’s halfway there already.

“It’s so cold,” Betty says, her hands wrapped around a paper cup of hot cocoa that he picked up for her on the way to lunch. “Why is it so cold?”

Veronica snorts into her latte. “Because the hell that is Riverdale finally froze over, that’s why.”

They are all sitting in the library, the weather too cold to eat outside but none of them really wanting to brave the cafeteria with its cliques and politics. Kevin and Veronica are practically sitting on top of each other on an armchair to stay warm and Jughead doesn’t miss the look Archie throws at Ronnie even though he obviously has nothing to worry about when it comes to Kevin.

“That’s new,” Jughead murmurs to Betty, who’s sitting with one leg tucked under her on the plush couch they are sitting on. Their thighs are touching hip to knee and the contact makes his body hum with heat. He doesn’t think he’d notice if the roof blew off and it was snowing directly on them.

Betty follows his gaze to a jealous looking Archie, who’s shooting daggers at their friends. “It’s not new,” she says with a quiet laugh. “Archie just can’t make up his mind. Val or Ronnie. Ronnie or Val. You know he’s never been good at making decisions.”

“Or with women,” Jughead deadpans and everyone looks over when Betty snorts out loud.

“Sorry,” she says and Jughead has to hide his laugh behind his hand. “Inside joke.”

“So B,” Veronica untangles herself from Kevin’s lap and perches herself on the arm of the chair. “Anything exciting happening in the world of you?”

“Jughead and I are going to the winter dance together,” she says with a bright smile and he loves that she reaches over to intertwine her fingers with his. “Are you guys going?”

Archie shoots a look at Veronica, that the brunette misses, and Jughead rolls his eyes. “Yeah, Arch. Who are you taking to the dance?” Betty squeezes his hand but if it’s in warning or because she wants to laugh, he really doesn’t know.

“Oh, um. I’m not sure yet.”

Veronica looks over at him, surprise written all over her face. “You’re not? What about Val?”

Jughead tries to read her question, see if there’s any underlying question there but damn if that girl isn’t a vault. She doesn’t wear her emotions on her features and he can’t tell if she’s genuinely curious or if there’s a deeper meaning behind her question.

He hates not being able to figure people out.

“The Pussycats are playing the dance so she’ll be busy most of the night so I don’t know. I might ask someone else.”

“Anyone we know?”

Everyone in the room is watching their interaction with great interest and Jughead thinks it’s pretty comical, the way their heads all turn from one person to other like a tennis match they can’t tear their eyes away from.

The ginger blushes, which is hilarious in its own right, and Jughead thinks if Archie’s face flushes anymore you won’t be able to tell where his forehead ends and his hair begins.

“I guess you’ll have to wait and see.”

Betty nudges him and he leans over so she can whisper in his ear. “Should we somehow get them to go together?”

Jughead feigns a gasp. “Betts, you want to interfere with our friends’ love lives? Scandalous.” She taps him on the head with her pen and he laughs.  “If you want me to talk to Archie, I will.”

She beams at him like he’s just said the magic words and maybe he has. He’s so stupid for this girl that if she asked him to jump off a building he’d probably say yes if she gave him a good enough reason. Hell, probably even if she didn’t give him a good reason.

Everyone pops out of their seats when the bell rings but he calls Archie over before he has a chance to rush off to class. Archie just gives him a weird look when he waits for everyone to leave before speaking.

“So are you going to ask Ronnie to the dance?”

Archie blanches. “Veronica…what? Why would you think that?”

“Give me a break, dude.” Jughead slaps his oldest friend on the shoulder as they start the walk to their next classes. “You were putting off some weird vibes when she asked you about Val. You should ask her.”

Archie is quiet until they reach the hallway where they have to split up to go to their separate classes.

“Think she’d say yes?”

Jughead shrugs. “I don’t know but it doesn’t hurt to ask.”

He gives his friend one more pat on the shoulder before heading off to calc.

***

A black limo is waiting outside of the Andrews house and he’s got a new suit to match.

Well, it’s not new but it’s new to him and this one actually fits unlike the one he wore to the funeral.

“Looking good, gentleman.”

Fred walks out of the kitchen with his phone out, ready to take pictures, and Jughead and Archie groan simultaneously.

“Dad, the girls aren’t even here yet.”

Fred chuckles and points to the fireplace. “What? Two guys can’t take a photo together? Go stand over there.”

The boys roll their eyes but do as their told. Jughead is just happy that no one else is here to see this ridiculousness.

“Well aren’t you two just the pinnacle of prom perfection?”

Veronica’s voice is laced with amusement and Jughead and Archie share matching groans again. Archie is quick to recover though when he sees Veronica standing in her dress, her black hair shining as she beams up at him.

“You look beautiful, Ronnie.” He leans down to brush his lips across her cheek and Jughead can see her blush from where he’s standing.

“Thank you.” Her voice is almost a whisper and honestly, if they aren’t dating before New Year’s he’ll eat his hat.

“Where’s Betty?”

Before he can even get the words out his girlfriend rounds the corner and he swears that he stops breathing all together. Her hair is down and brushed over one shoulder, a change from the high ponytail she almost always wears and her pale lavender dress leaves her shoulders bare.

“Wow,” he murmurs and she must hear him because she blushes furiously before coming to stand in front of him.

“You look pretty wow yourself,” she says as she runs her hands down the front of his jacket.

“Yeah, Forsythe,” Veronica teases. “You clean up pretty nice.”

“Thanks,” he says without looking away from Betty. “And if you call me that again, I will end you. Just so you know.”

Veronica lets out a breathy laugh. “That would require you to take your eyes off Betty which frankly, I don’t see you doing anytime soon.”

“She’s got a point,” he says quietly and Betty blushes again. “Betty, you look incredible.”

Her hands tighten around his lapels. “Thank you. So do you. This suit…” She bites her bottom lip and he almost loses his mind.

“You like?”

She nods. “I do. I love, actually.”

His heart beats so fast it feels like it’s going to fly out of his chest when the word love tumbles from her pretty lips.

Any day now he’s going to tell her how he feels. Maybe even any minute.

He’s pretty sure that she already knows.

***

Tap, tap, tap.

The noise wakes him up and he rubs his eyes as he looks down at his phone. They only got home from the dance an hour and a half ago and it’s nearing two in the morning. He had just nodded off to sleep when the telltale sound of the girl next door at his window woke up him.

Betty is waiting outside, hair and makeup still done from the dance but she’s wrapped in a pair of fuzzy pajama pants and long sleeve thermal shirt.

“What are you doing, silly girl?” He asks when he opens the window. “It’s late.”

“Meet me in my backyard in five minutes,” she tells him, ducking into give him a quick kiss before rushing back over to her house.

He chuckles as he slides on his jacket and beanie, lacing his boots before taking the basement’s back door out into the yard. The hinges creak on the Cooper’s back gate and he looks up at her parent’s bedroom to make sure it’s still dark before sneaking through it and into her backyard.

“Over here,” Betty calls softly and he uses his phone to light his path over to where she’s lying down on a blanket.

“What are you doing?”

She pats the blanket next to her and he grins as he drops to the ground beside her. “I didn’t want this night to end,” she says quietly, like it’s a secret, and maybe it is. Maybe it’s a secret between the two of them, something that they can share because he didn’t want the night to end either.

Dancing with her, his arms wrapped tightly around her on the dance floor. Everyone knowing once and for all that he was hers and she was his. Kissing her whenever he wanted. It was probably the best night of his life.

“The dance was fun,” she says as she puts an extra blanket over their legs.

“Mhm,” he murmurs against her hair when she rests her head against his shoulder. “You’re a much better dancer than I thought you’d be,” he jokes and she pokes him with her pinky.

“That’s my line,” she teases.

“I have many talents you don’t know about.” Betty shivers and he pulls the blanket up around her more. “Betty…”

“Mmm?” When he looks down her eyes are closed, a serene smile playing over her lips, and he wishes he could somehow bottle this moment and use it during all of the moments in his life when she’s not around. When he’s scared or lonely or angry. She’s like a good mood pill, a ray of sunshine on a rainy day. The light to his dark. He doesn’t want to lose her.

He can’t lose her.

His voice is a whisper against her hair. “Betty, I love you. I think, in some ways, I always have.”

She doesn’t still like he was afraid she would, doesn’t make a disgusted noise or look away. She simply looks up at him, that beautiful smile still on her lips, and kisses him softly.

“I love you, too.”

Four words, seared into his memory. Branded onto his heart.

He closes his eyes and sighs. It’s like a weight has been lifted off of his chest that he didn’t even know was there.

They fall asleep under a December moon, stars twinkling above them as the winter wind swirls around them.

He’s not a poet but he is a writer and as his eyes drift closed he thinks he could write an entire novel about how he feels right at this moment. Safe and warm and loved.

Four words have given him a four letter word he’s been unable to find his entire life but he’s found it here in the arms of a girl that radiates everything good in the world.

Home.

[buffytardis]

"A&E sporting major hard-ons for Hοοk & sacrificing anything & everything in order to make it all about him" lmao like they haven't been doing the exact same for Regina since 3B, half the cast including ur precious Emma and her whole fam have been assassinated to prop her whiny homicidal rapist ass while ERs cheer& bash anyone too ~mean to her. It's making my Yr to see u all angry about the same thing happen with Hook. From an early-seasons Oncer, I mean this sincerely:U broke it! Enjoy! ;-)

Lol! Aww, seeing not-smart-at-all messages from people who can’t judge is always making laugh! xD

Sure, sure, giving attention to a CORE character (and the one who turned out to be carrying the whole show and to be portrayed by the actress who was getting the most praise for her acting and putting the show on the map) is just the same with making it all about a pretty actor who has no arc, anything involving him is stupid & always proven illogical, nonsensical, never true to what good they were saying they were trying to pass, on the contrary proving the opposite (how awful he is), and all that while destroying the characters & relationships of everyone else.

Sure, giving attention to the character who is involved with every single character & core character at that and has meaningful history & relationships with is just the same with someone who was forcibly inserted and relationships/characters/arcs had to be frakked up for him to exist & to continue existing.

Sure, writing arcs for the one character without whom the show couldn’t have existed/continued is just the same with giving all your screentime to a literally nobody that offers nothing good and destroys everything.

Sure, writing arcs for the major character of the core that involve almost equally every single other core character is just the same with giving all your screentime to a nobody & the screentime you don’t give to him, it’s with the others revolving about him & being props to him.

Sure, writing about your core character and evolving them while evolving and strengthening your other core character, Emma, is just the same with fanwanking via your “writing” as if teenaged crappy CrS fanfiction writer with some weird fetishes & anachronistic wet dreams for your resident “pretty boy” who serves literally no purpose for existing and the only thing he does is frakkin’ up that core character, Emma, with toxic & misogynistic messages, rendering her to a perfect nobody who lives and breathes for him and doesn’t care about her son & family & will frak them over & endanger them just because “Ηook”.

The whole Charming family, Emma, and Henry are all either strengthened either by Regina or supported and elevated by their relationship with her. Hοοk has degraded every single one of them. Both as human beings and as characters (random example: Hοοk murdering a black person right in front of Emma, the Savior and sheriff, and just ignoring it, never mentioning ever again & of course the pretty boy never suffering any consequences for that).

Sure, call “homicidal” the woman who murdered 1 person in 1x07 while feeling threatened that she’d lose her happy ending and not the person who murdered gleefully a week ago -in their timeline- and while having his supposedly “True Love” begging to not do it, while being offered the world at his feet & having all the support he needed. Not the person who just the other week was trying to murder Emma and her whole family for no reason at all. Not that Regina is excused, but do not give free passes to someone who’s even worse. Ffs, he was killing just for the fun of it (and while not being abused his whole life).

Sure, call “rapist” the woman who never raped anyone, no matter how much you haters try to headcanon your way into it, and not the man who raped by official definition many women.

The facts are these: you can’t force anyone to do anything if you don’t hold their heart (that has been obvious by the show and also it has been stated by the writer). If you just possess it & you don’t hold it on your hand to use it to instruct someone, they have their own free will. If your hatred about Regina is that big that you can’t think calmly and logically, then think about that: Regina not having her heart in s3. Was Zelena controlling her then? Was everything REegina was doing until she got back her heart Zelena’s instructions? Was Regina kissing RH & going after him because Zelena instructed her to? No, because Zelena just had Regina’s heart to use it in a ritual, she wasn’t instructing Regina to do anything. Likewise Graham wasn’t controlled in s1 either. FFS he sought her out in order to kiss her/sleep with her trying to feel something & she was surprised to see him at her door! Not to mention, that she wanted him to stay overnight and he didn’t. If she were controlling him, wouldn’t she make him do just that? In the EF, Regina made a comment “get him to my chambers”. That’s it. Did you see any continuation of that? No. Does anything in that sentence informs you of a sure thing that has been done or that surely would be done? No. Then what the frak is anyone going about? I’m sorry, I thought she was the Evil Queen, I thought one would use fear to scare a person who just betrayed her, and having him stew in her chambers worrying about his fate would be a perfect punishment. Also: are you people for real? If you just got frkkin’ betrayed, if someone said they’d give you what you’ve wanted for years now & then went and try to fool you into thinking they did, would you feel in the mood for sex? And especially with that person??? You honestly think that Regina’s mind at that moment was “mmm, yes, I’m so in the mood for sex right now!”? o_0 I know it’s too difficult for some of you, but do think to use your brains every once in a while. It won’t hurt. Or if it does, well… ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ Oh, and furthermore? Hororwitz even said that she never raped anyone. So, if anyone has trouble thinking for themselves, then trust the canon words from your canon writer.Now, on Ηook: “I’d say you were trying to get me drunk… and that is usually MY tactic.” Em, I’m sorry, isn’t that textbook rape?? You know, drunk people can’t consent? He’s saying that he’s repeatedly done just that: got women drunk to sleep with them (I guess these one didn’t have husbands to murder in order to sleep with them, which is his other tactic. Wow, such a poor guy & such a victim & such a reason to murder people!)

How about you call a rapist the one who actually is?? How about you don’t judge people based on who you like? First we judge & then we like/dislike, only brainless zealots -who are in abudance in this fandom- like/dislike first and then judge according to that like/dislike. How about you don’t call names & falsely accuse people just because you don’t like them and do that to people who actually deserve it & have done what you accuse them of? Eeeeveryone will be better off for it. :)

“Whiny”? Regina?! xD Seriously?? The one who never talked to anyone about how bad she had it? The one who never mentioned to anyone, which helped all of you to ignore it, the fact that she was forced into a marriage with a man 3 times her age, a man who could’ve been her grandfather, and was getting raped since she never wanted to sleep with him and was forced to raise his daughter, who ruined her happy ending and forced her into this fate? And she did raise her well, Snow White grew up and she was still hugging Regina at her father’s funeral, so obviously she was oblivious to Regina’s pain. Regina, who never said about how she had to kill Daniel, her love, because someone reanimated him and he was suffering begging her to end him? Regina, who never said to anyone, and especially Emma, either when she was accusing her of being a monster or when she was her friend, how Cora murdered Daniel because Snow White betrayed her? Emma saw Regina’s memory in 5x05 and she was shocked & “I’m sorry, I never knew”. Up until that point she thought that the frudge was just because a child told a secret (like Emma accused Regina of at s4B and Regina just took it & never corrected her). That Regina you mean? Is there any chance you just spelled “Ηοοk” wrong? The man who just stole the bean from Emma’s hands, thusly both letting them to die and leading to Henry being kidnapped, it wouldn’t have happened if not for Hοοk, and he came back after seeing that all was good & acted like a poor, tortured puppy trying to make it as if Emma made an impact on him & “aww, he was just needing reminding!” The man who keep going about darkness, dubbing his f*ckeries and him being a douchebag as such, just because he had watched Emma giving the benefit of the doubt to Regina, someone who actually was forced into darkness and was abused and has tried to redeem herself and was worthy of Emma’s chances? The man who tries to force Emma to be with him because he whines about “darkness” & how “she keeps him on his path”? So, what do you mean, mate? Unless she caters to your needs & desires you’ll just go around killing husbands to sleep with their wives and murder children (Rufio) or sell them out to the greatest villains (Baelfire to Pan) just because?

Υοu mean to call “whiny” the woman who owed up to what she did (and constantly keeps owing them up to the point of self-punishment) & even when Emma was “you didn’t have a choice” (and she kinda didn’t, hell, she lasted too long, if you ask me, with all she suffered) Regina was “of course I did” & she kept fighting her darkness daily and resisting & no one being none the wiser about it (5x22 is when Emma first ehars about it)? Not the man who was constantly “oh my woes” & was whining at the field “no, don’t tether me to the Excalibur” because he was too weak to fight darkness and certainly not for Emma (when the previous day was all “I’ll always fight for us”, lol, I guess only if it includes him, never for just Emma, so in essence he “fights” for his needs who happen to include Emma. And by “fight” I mean stalking her and presusring her, no actual fighting as depicting by him not wanting even for a second to fight the Darkness for her)? Not the man who when became the Dark One he started whining about “knowing she’d triedt o control him, now no one will ever control him”. FFS, whenever has a dark villain whined that pathetically before? xD

You say about ERs “attacking” people who are too ~mean to Regina, whereas Hοοkers (go figure with the name they chose to be called) bash and collectively attack anyone and everyone who’s not kissing the ground Hοοk walks on & hate on anyone who takes a second of screentime without him being there. Also, personally? I don’t care, attack Regina all you want, she’s fictional you know, it’s not like her feelings are getting hurt (xD)! Wake up and spend your whole day attacking her or worshipping her, it makes absolutely no difference to me, whether you do or don’t. But at least do it with proper and real accusations & characterisations, not with your headcanons & distorted views that probably your faves’ collective tag decided to pass as your “official line” regarding her character. Unless you are a mindless sheep. Then “beeeeh” your lungs out along with them. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯And more importantly, do not come at me, at my personal space, like a coward hiding behind anonymity (and btw unless your tumblr handle is your name and surname, then you’re still anonymous, you know. So otherwise, what’s that? Being extra cowardish? o_0 One gets more respect when they say their opinion bravely and with a name, even if it’s a pseudonym, just like the people you attack for their comments do) to say stuff that do not stand.

And lastly, my dear, one more fact, because that’s how I roll, with facts & not with imaginary things:

Season 1, when it was about Regina and her relationships with everyone, and more importantly, no Ηοοk: 10mil viewership & 3.2 demo.

Season 5, when it was all about Hοοk: 4.4mil and 1.3 demo (all numbers on average).

And just for the sake of it, s3B, the point where you say it was about Regina (but it wasn’t? Not really, it was the point where they were starting to force their emetic pairings, they brought RH frakking Regina’s character up and started to force Hοοk more on Emma. I mean it if were a season about Regina, then shouldn’t the finale be about her & not a CrS movie? Finales are supposed to be the closure of the arcs of the whole season & it was a “CrS 2-hour special” before they got them officially together): ~7mil (6.9mil to be precise) and 2.1 demo.

(Ps. I read somewhere that Hοοk lost them in s5 like the 33% of viewership from the previous season?)

(Ps2.: You said “they’ve been doing for Regina since 3B”. Em, wasn’t s4A all about “Frozen” and Emma’s struggle with magic and Hοοk stalking her into submission? And that’s what he was doing since even he commented that she was avoiding him and he as still disregarding her wishes and forcing her presence on her. S1 (and then followed by s2) was more about Regina than any other and the ones you mention as hers, were anything but. So, I’m starting to think that you all subconsciously started hating crapΟUΑΤ, but you didn’t want to admit the real reasons & you try to pin it on the character you just don’t like.)

Now, is it me or do the numbers actually show a gradual decline the more they frak Regina’s character up (& sideline her, and make her just a half of a “ship”, just like they were doing with Emma) and the more they force Hοοk/CrS? 0:-)

Bonus: This is what they were saying about s1 back then:

Good luck trying to find any of these elements now. It’s actually as if their comments are mocking us from the past. “Her pursuit of a happy ending is not about finding a man”. LOL! “Rip Emma Swan”, alright, because that Emma is so dead! Now we have a zombie, an empty shell of a former strong female and current nobody who learns she about to die & the only thing she worries about is about Ηοοk’s(!) future. #SuchMotherAndDaughterMuchWow “Saving the men”. Lol! They effed up Emma’s Savior role, just to make it how Hοοk “won” back his return to the land of the living! But again, suuure, it’s “Regina” who ruined everything.

Ps. Aww, a “

[ryder616]

Rewatching Yes Men

I tried. I really did. I watched it Saturday morning, put it on the big screen, never paused to not disrupt the narrative flow (lol), all with a cat keeping me company and being a total sweetheart. But I still couldn’t get over the stupid and the yucky.

Lorelei controls men, and men only, with her voice. She can and does reinforce control with touch, but the voice is the key element. And women are totally immune to both. Ookaay. So why do they send guys after her? WHYYYY? And if they must send guys - hey, maybe there’s no time to assemble an all female task-force, I mean the situation is pretty dire, Rooster’s flock might rob a few more stores 🙄 - can’t they just give them earplugs or something?

And so Lorelei bewitches Ward and then has sex with him, because of course she does, while he’s under her spell and has no free will. But he’s a guy and she’s hot so no problem, I guess? By golly though, he and May better break up their co-workers with benefits arrangement because she is not who he really desires, you see.

Judging from their expressions below, I think the Bus Kids just finished watching the episode too😁

If it wasn’t for the ending and the absolutely flooring revelation that May is a double agent this would be the one and only S1 episode I would advise new people to skip.

I still can’t believe they wasted Lady Sif in this.😞

Traitorous Ward Watch:

Ward pulls the trigger after Lorelei’s been muted, seizing the perfect opportunity to get rid of the main threat on the team with no suspicions or culpability. There’s another possibility: Ward was aware the gun had no magazine and shoot it because...yeah, I got nothing. Option 1 it is.

May’s Boundless Badassary:

The fight with Ward is a tie but he’s trying to kill her, she’s not. And she manages to eject and steal the gun’s magazine without him noticing (this is also suggests he might have just been showing off when he was pestering Fitz about that ounce).

Take Your Daughter to Work Day:

“This is a powerful secret, a secret men died for. Until we know why, we can’t share this with anyone, for their safety and ours.” Remember when in 1x07 Coulson told Skye “someday I may need to trust you with a secret and I need to know that you can keep it?”. Well. Here we are. Incidentally, the girl who hate(d) secrets and the guy who said “I’m tired of secrets, we need to root out all the secrets” just three episodes ago are now keeping a pretty big secret from the rest of team.

Stuff that crossed my mind:

I must look terrible! Yeah. You look like Chloe Bennet with professionally applied no make-up make-up. Truly hideous😂

Skye’s preoccupation with her looks the second Ward appears is of course a dead giveaway. I think it’s more interesting the act Ward is performing. Or are we supposed to believe that Mr. “I’m everyone’s type” doesn’t know how to talk to a girl he really likes? Either way, I’m glaring.

They did something to him. He needs help. Of course she wants to help Mike, the plucky ball of empathy 🤗

Next time I don’t want to depend on some miracle drug to save me. Please notice the lack of “if” in the sentence. *heavy sigh*

How was Tahiti? -- It sucked. Coulson was so proud of his cool vacation and then it turns out he was actually just passed out drunk on his boss’ couch with the Travel channel in the background.

May called it The Welcome Wagon! Skye’s bad influence is spreading 😂

*drops from the sky, majestically emerging from the smoke and dust* *resonant voice* Your world is in grave danger. I would love to see an Asgardian play or movie because they are the most dramatic people in the universe.

Thor will be pleased to hear it. He considers you a friend. -- I feel the same, which is why I'd prefer he hear it from me, if that's okay. Yeah, she should not have trusted you on this at all, Son of Coul.

Men have an inherent weakness we do not share. Plenty of those, really, but the ability to use earplugs ain’t one!

Goodbye Night-Night gun, hello ICER who looks just like a normal gun save for the blue stripes. I’m sure the props department was happy.

When you're up against people who are being controlled, sometimes it's hard to distinguish friend from foe. Ow. Ow. You can’t hit me with this while I’m trying not to roll my eyes every 30 seconds at the episode, it’s not fair!

That's an order. -- That's not a good enough reason! See Jemma? I told you. When you don’t agree, you don’t like the rules at all 😎

The fire extinguisher is once again Dr. Dr. Jemma Simmons’ weapon of choice. And she’s right, Fitz gets knocked out with alarming frequency is season 1. That oxygen deprivation thing got them all off the hook, ‘cause I’m not so sure he hadn’t already sustained a brain injury at the rate he was going.

And you should take your own advice. You've been sitting on something since the Guest House. If not with me, then with Skye. She deserves to know what you saw down there. She means it and yet this is some first rate manipulation. When she couldn’t make him open up with her, she nudges him toward talking it out with Skye, having bugged the medpod so she can listen in. Also, it’s a good thing that May doesn’t do petty because first the guy she’s sleeping with is pining for Skye and now her best friend won’t confide in her but will in Skye. I wouldn’t blame her if she was a little piqued.

And you've had that stuff in you for some time now, and you're okay, right? Plus, you're not sprouting a pointy tail or anything, so bonus there. Skye, Agent of B.U.F.F.Y.

So, quick recap: May is spying for Fury, Ward is spying for Garrett, Garrett is scheming in the background and now Coulson is keeping the truth about the GH325 from the team and has enlisted Skye as his co-conspirator. It’s almost as if this was a spy show!😎

[stahlop]

Once Upon a Time 1x11 “Fruit of the Poisonous Tree” Review

Reviews 1x01 1x02 1x03 1x04 1x05 1x06  1x07 1x08 1x09 1x10

I wasn’t a huge fan of this story. In the EF I found the king too gullible. In Storybrooke, Emma is too trusting and what the hell is up with her superpower, because it didn’t work at all this episode. I also felt they cast the wrong actor as the king and Genie. Richard Schiff usually plays lawyers and doctors. He did not make a very good king. Giancarlo Esposito is so much better than either Genie and Sidney.

Synopsis: Sidney asks Emma to bring down Regina by uncovering evidence that would expose her corruption. In the EF, a king finds a magic lamp with a genie and wishes him free. He falls for Regina, the king’s wife and they plot to be free from the kingdom.

Opening: Genie appearing.

New Characters: 

King Leopold: Although he is never called by his name in the episode, this is how he is listed in IMDB. He is Snow’s father and Regina’s husband and he’s an idiot. He is granted three wishes by a magical genie and he just stands there thinking because he is so happy and his kingdom is so happy that there is nothing that he could wish for. I call bullshit on this. Even if he is so ridiculously happy, there has to be something he would wish for. Or, after Genie tells him that all wishes end badly, that he would still free Genie because he feels it is the right thing to do. If you have nothing to wish for, just don’t wish for anything. This whole scene rubbed me the wrong way (no pun intended). Later on at the king’s birthday party, he dotes on Snow. Ok, I can be on board with that. But then bringing up your dead wife while you’re new wife is sitting right there, making her feel like she doesn’t even exist? Who does that? And then, he gets pissed that, even though he doesn’t love Regina like she deserves to be loved, that she has the audacity to have feelings for another man. Well why wouldn’t she? Do you really expect her to be unhappy when you’ve told Genie that everyone else in your kingdom is happy? The king also mentions that ‘love makes people do foolish things’. Yes, it does, like Genie lusting after your wife. He seems to be the only new man in the palace. Come on, use your brain!  I mean, killing him was a little extreme, but dude was an idiot. 

Character Observations:

Genie/Sidney: This is the magic mirror’s origin story. Before he was trapped in a mirror he was the genie of the lamp. Apparently, he’s just meant to be trapped somewhere. He was trapped in the lamp, then he was kind of trapped at King Leopold’s castle, and then he became trapped in the mirror. I understand that Genie was new to love, and Regina was unhappily married, but did he really expect her to give up her kingdom for him? What did he do besides dispense advice to the king? Did he get paid at all? Did he really expect Regina to live poorly with him? For all that Genie has supposedly seen with his wishes, he really got duped pretty badly. When he does end up making his wish in a desperation to keep Regina, he says he ‘wishes to be with her forever, to look upon her face always, and to never leave her side’. Technically, that’s three wishes, but the lamp doesn’t seem to care, and that’s how Genie ends up trapped in the mirror.

Sidney is, well, Sidney is acting on Regina’s orders the entire time. He’s her puppet. He probably has no idea why he’s so attracted to Regina, but the curse has made him take orders no matter who it hurts. He pretends to be so upset about being fired from the paper and being made a fool of for losing the election that he wants to take Regina down, and Emma believes him. And because the audience believes in Emma, we also believe in Sidney until we see him with Regina at the end. We also get a lot of Genie and Magic Mirror sayings from him. He tells Emma he can ‘grant her wish’ when she and Mary Margaret are talking about taking down Regina. He, again, says to Emma ‘all we need is a crack in the mirror to show everyone’ when he tells her about the missing money.

Emma: She really made me mad in this episode.  She starts off saying she’s the sheriff, she has to do everything by the book. Then when they’re looking through the public records for where the money supposedly went, they find that the files are missing and Sidney wants to get a warrant to search Regina’s office. Emma doesn’t think a judge will go against Regina, so when she decides to confront Regina about the records (yes, please, lets let the person we’re trying to take down know we are looking into their financials), she decides to plant a bug, something she would need a court order to do. She changed her mind pretty fast about playing by the rules. And then, when they miss the secret meeting that they follow Regina to, Emma decides to just break into Regina’s office and steal her files!  Emma has a quick change of heart when she realizes she did exactly what she told Henry she wouldn’t do, stoop to Regina’s level, and that all their ‘evidence’ is illegally obtained, so it won’t hold up in court. Emma’s pretty much done at this point, so Sidney pulls out the box of photos Regina had him take of her when she came to town. He also says he’ll go after Regina if Emma won’t. Now, here is where it goes off the rails for me. If Emma had let Sidney confront Regina at the City Council meeting without her being a part of it, she would have been able to look into his accusations without it coming back that things were obtained illegally.  It would have been Sidney, not a member of law enforcement, who had stolen the files, and then Emma could have confiscated them for evidence. But no, she decides to play her hand at the City Council meeting and ends up getting her ass handed to her by Regina when she reveals it’s a playground she’s building. So now Emma looks like a sheriff with a vendetta against the mayor because she accused Regina at a public forum and Regina tells Emma to stay away from Henry, so now she’s lost the one person who believed in her.

Evil Queen/Regina: I think I said in either episode one or two that the Evil Queen doesn’t know how to play a long con, that she only thinks in the short term, well, I was wrong. The way EQ manipulates Genie is genius. The moment she sees him she knows she can use him. We haven’t seen how Regina acted before she was the Evil Queen. We saw her in The Heart is a Lonely Hunter after Leopold died. She seemed at that point to be sweet and then we saw that she had been plotting all along. Snow seems to believe she is a sweet and loving step-mother, right up until she realizes that The Huntsman is meant to kill her under Regina’s orders. We don’t know how long Regina and Leopold have been married, so we don’t know how long she has been planning his murder.  Did EQ ever love Leopold?  Was this an arranged marriage? Was EQ nice at one point and morphed into the EQ because of this marriage? Hopefully, plot points we will learn in the future. But we see her skillful handling of Genie. She sees that he is taken with her, she uses it to her advantage. She makes him believe that she is lonely and unworthy of his love. She pretends she is going to kill herself with the Agrabahn Viper and makes Genie believe it is his idea to kill the king for her. Once his usefulness is done, she shows her true colors. Although, she has provided safe passage for him when she could have just let him take the blame and be killed, so it seems she had some feelings for him.

Regina uses Sidney in much the same way she used him as Genie, except, due to the curse, he doesn’t understand why he’s so devoted to her when he knows she’s using him. Regina knows just what to tell him to get him to do what she wants, and she tells him exactly what to say to Emma so she will do what Regina wants. Notice that when Emma accuses Regina of building a summer house in the woods with the stolen funds, Regina already has a slide presentation ready to go about the playground. She knew Sidney would steer Emma in the direction to confront her at the City Council meeting. And Regina uses the leverage she has over Emma making a fool of herself to keep her away from Henry. Game, set, match.

Snow/Mary Margaret: Neither are in this episode that much. Snow basically feeds into her father’s obsession with her. He calls her ‘fairest in all the land’ like her mother. She doesn’t seem to be bonding with step-mother dearest either as neither of them were talking to each other in the garden or the king’s party.

Mary Margaret is continuing her ‘affair’ with David. They are having secret picnics out by the old toll bridge, and she clings to Sidney’s advice that ‘sometimes doing a bad thing for a good reason is okay’ as to how she can justify her affair.

Henry: He’s sad that his castle is first destroyed by the storm, and then torn down by Regina. He also loses the story book when Regina tears it down, as he had hidden it in a toolbox in the sand. He later tries to recreate the story book from memory in his own notebook. Later, he’s playing on the new playground and tells Emma that she doesn’t have to listen to Regina when she tells him they can’t see each other for awhile.

The Stranger: He still doesn’t have a name. We only see him twice this episode. Once when Henry is trying to recreate the story book. Henry wants to know why the Stranger is really there, and he responds with ‘stuff’ (as was Henry’s answer when he asked what the book was about), and second when we see he has taken the toolbox and is now in possession of the story book. He seems in shock and awe and that this he knows exactly what it is that he is looking at.

Gold: Again, very little screen time, but he does give Emma and Sidney some good advice. He tells them that ‘emotional entanglements can lead us down very dangerous paths.’ Speaking from experience again I assume. He also tries to ally himself with Emma again but she turns him down. He has some agenda that he needs Emma for, we just don’t know what it is yet.

Henry, Sr.: We see the depth of his love for Regina, as he will do anything to help her escape her marriage. He even mentions this to Genie that the guards know he would die for Regina. He goes to Genie with the box containing the viper and tells him that it will help free Regina. Does he know how evil Regina is becoming, does he know that the king will be dying once the vipers get to Regina or does he honestly think she will use it to kill herself like she makes the Genie believe? I am very interested in Henry, Sr. and Regina’s background. He loves her very much, so how did he let Regina get into a loveless marriage. Why is he her manservant? Where is Regina’s mother?

Questions:

When was Sidney fired from the paper? After he ran an article about Emma being in jail? After he lost the election? Was that just part of the ploy to get Emma to feel sorry for him? Has this scheme of Regina’s been going on since the election?

How long was it between Genie coming to the castle and the king’s birthday?

Is there a judicial system in Storybrooke?

How did Genie get the mirror out of the lamp to give to Regina? 

How does Regina not spot the sheriff’s car following her into the woods? They are the only two cars on the road!

Did Gold give Emma and Sidney a lift back to town or did they call a tow truck?

Didn’t Sidney say he was fired from the paper? Why do he and Emma meet at the newspaper office to look at the blueprints and escrow statements?

Did Emma even look at the blueprints? They clearly state the ‘mansion’ Emma thinks Regina is building is only 4 feet tall if she read the measurements.

Why is the playground being built in the middle of the woods?

How did the playground get built so fast? Henry was playing on it the day of or after the council meeting.

Is the Stranger the author of the book?

Observations:

Genie states that he’s granted 1001 wishes and seen them all go wrong. 1001 is not divisible by 3, so either he’s exaggerating or some people didn’t get to make all their wishes. Most likely this is a reference to 1001 Arabian Nights, the collection of stories Aladdin is originally from.

The lamp still grants wishes without the genie.

Regina’s name in EF is also Regina.

Not only does Regina’s computer not have a password, but it turns on immediately!

Emma types in ‘land, sold, Gold, property’ to find the correct files on Regina’s computer.

Regina has a large amount of skeleton keys in her office.

Even if Regina used the City Council funds to build a playground, it’s still illegal to take the money secretly and build a playground without the rest of the council’s approval. 

The Agrabahn Viper has a head on either end and no tail.

The jewels in the lamp start out green. Once all the wishes are made they are now red.

Timeline Issues:

Sidney tells Emma that Regina stole the City Council funds at least 3 weeks ago (according to the records). Emma confronts Regina about it and plants the bug that day and then follows Regina to the meeting with Gold that night. Obviously, Regina is buying the land to build the playground on, unless she’s sending Emma on a wild goose chase. Then it seems as though Emma and Sidney go to break into Regina’s office later that night, or possibly the next night. Then the City Council meeting is the next day and since Regina so conveniently has the slide show presentation ready about the new playground, it would seem she was planning on bringing it up to the council. After the meeting, Regina tells Emma to stay away from Henry. We next see Emma watching Henry on the already built playground, most likely later that same day or the next day. How is this playground built already? Also, Emma wears the exact same outfit in every single scene in this episode even though it takes place over several days (black pants, dark grey turtleneck, grey beanie, and blue, leather, racer jacket). Regina has three changes of clothing throughout.

I didn’t like this episode. Emma is made a fool of by using her emotions instead of her instincts. She’s manipulated by both Sidney and Regina and makes awful choices. Regina is now attempting to play nice by asking Emma to do her job as sheriff instead of looking for things that aren’t there. She never once raises her voice or insults Emma as she had been doing. And Emma paid the price for her foolishness and can’t see Henry for awhile. Honestly, this episode should have been called Fool in Love or Foolish Heart for how foolish Emma, Genie, and Leopold were in this episode.

Please leave comments and reblog!

@searchingwardrobes  @thisonesatellite @justbecauseyoubelievesomething

@laschatzi @profdanglaisstuff @mariakov81