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cripplecharacters · 8 months ago

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How to Support People with Facial Differences - the Face Equality Week 2024 Special

[large text: How to Support People with Facial Differences - the Face Equality Week 2024 Special]

Today is the 13th of May, which means that the Face Equality Week has just started. This year's theme is “My Face is a Masterpiece” which is probably my favorite sentence ever said about having a facial difference. Huge fan, should be used way more often in my opinion.

Because of this occasion, I would like to share some thoughts about Face Equality that I think are rather entry-level, i.e. you don't need to know much to execute these, but you can still support us.

Stop the stare.

I know it's fun to stare - or so I guess, at least - but maybe you shouldn't. Next time you see someone who has a scar or who's face does not move the same way as yours, just mind your business. We can tell when you're “discreetly” looking.

Don't call us deformed.

Knowing how the people you're trying to support actually call themselves should be an absolute first step, but most people still fail here. Most of us don't appreciate being called “deformed”. I certainly don't. Say “facial difference”, or “disfigurement” if you must. It's 2024. Leave “deformed” to medical reports from the 70s.

No more “What happened?!”s.

If you aren't a doctor, there's a high-to-100% chance that it's none of your business. It's cool that you're curious - keep it to yourself.

Stop insinuating that we are ugly.

“Support people who are ugly!” isn't very supportive. I would say, not in the slightest. Say “people who don't fit the current beauty standards” if that's what you mean.

Or, to go with this year's theme, “people whose faces are masterpieces” : )

Use critical thinking online.

Is the reaction photo actually funny, or is it just a person with a craniofacial condition? Is the meme actually a meme, or is it just making fun of a person with a facial disfigurement? Is body-shaming suddenly hilarious to you when the person shamed has strabismus?

If the entire punchline is “lol they have a disability xd”, it's ableism. Plain and simple.

To go with the point above - your joke is probably not funny.

We get it! You can't help telling us how "you're going to hell for laughing" (which yeah, probably) and how we remind you of the ugliest character you have ever seen. I guarantee you that we heard it, and that you are behaving like an edgy middle schooler who hasn't "found out" yet. It's boring and annoying. Also ableist, but you're aware of that already if you're saying that you're going to hell.

Stop with the goddamn trigger warnings.

We aren't “body horror”, we aren't “gore”, we aren't something that you need to advise your viewers to use their discretion over. Every “graphic footage: child with neurofibromatosis” and “#tw burn scar” is a sign of ableism and disfiguremisia. People with facial differences deserve to be seen. Ableds can survive seeing a person without a nose.

Do a basic reading on what disfiguremisia is.

New word! And a pretty damn important one. It's a brand of ableism that intersects with more or less everything, and it means discrimination and hatred of people with facial differences/disfigurements. The bullying, harassment, endless name-calling, and microaggressions are all results of disfiguremisia. The ways in which everything is harder for us isn't some unchangeable rule of how the world works, it's just an extremely prevalent type of discrimination.

Understand that we are people.

I know, revolutionary - and yet impossible for so many people to get. We can be a visual representation of evil when it's necessary, we can be a feel-good inspirational story on a morning talk-show, but not much else, it seems. In reality, we are complex, we have our own lives, we can be happy and sad and have the same exact joys and worries that you have.

Hey, artists - facial differences don't make you evil.

Title stolen from a great essay by Lise Deguire (link). When's the last time you saw a positive character with a facial difference that wasn't inspiration porn? I mean a character that's not edgy, full of angst, a murderer, or a villain. Based on what you see in the media, you'd think that having a scar renders you evil on the spot, but in reality it just makes you loathe how artists apparently think you are like. It's boring, it's overdone, it's ableism. Stop doing this, and start noticing when it's being done. Point it out if your friend is writing their new villain to be an evil burn survivor. This kind of portrayal needed to stop ages ago, but tomorrow will be a great time as well.

Before you reply with “I've never seen this” - Darth Vader, Lion King’s Scar (subtle name, great thing to teach kids!), Freddy Krueger, Voldemort, we could be here forever. You're just not paying attention.

Pay attention to where we are not included.

As discussed, there are some places where you see us all the time. But where do you not see us?

Advertisements (unless it's for a scar-removal cream, of course). Fashion shows. Magazine covers. Romance movies where we are the main character.

We deserve to see ourselves in what's around us in the same way able-bodied people do. Trying to make it seem like we don't exist - that's deliberate.

Interact with our art.

We draw, write, sing, act in movies, we do everything! Support us in the most tangible way - leave us a nice comment, read our books, listen to our songs. Watch movies where actual people with facial differences star, not pseudoinspirational stories about how “being disfigured is ok” where they shove an able-bodied actor into a full face prosthetic just to not have an actor with a disfigurement on set.

Include us.

As this year's Face Equality Week calls for, include us. In art, in movies, in books, in your life. Show us as positive people who are valuable, who are a part of your community - I guarantee that we are in every one that's out there. The world is hostile and unwelcoming to people with facial differences - be the change, wherever you are!

I know that it is different from the usual posts I make, but I hope it was somewhat educational. I just like to use every occasion that I can to force Face Equality into people's heads. To make this at least a bit about writing to keep the blog's theme, I will say that if you want to write about us, you need to care about us in real life as well. Otherwise, it's shallow and pointless.

Below the readmore are some links/resources that you can click to educate yourself further. A lot of them lead to Face Equality International because they have just about everything you should know. If you want to be a better ally to people with facial differences, I heavily recommend them!

#MyFaceIsAMasterpiece

mod Sasza

https://faceequalityinternational.org/2023/04/why-i-will-not-hide/

https://www.psychologytoday.com/gb/blog/disability-is-diversity/202111/hidden-community-the-movement-face-equality

https://faceequalityinternational.org/2022/05/facial-differences-in-the-media/

https://faceequalityinternational.org/2023/04/advertising-excludes-women-with-faces-like-mine/

https://www.phoenix-society.org/resources/burn-community-bookshelf

https://faceequalityinternational.org/about-fei/international-face-equality-week/

https://faceequalityinternational.org/2023/04/hidden-from-view-women-with-facial-differences-in-the-media/

https://www.phoenix-society.org/resources/i-dont-see-your-scars

whoa thanks for actually clicking the readmore!!

#mod sasza #face difference #face equality week #face equality #facial difference

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lgbtlunaverse · 9 months ago

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This page from the adventurer's bible makes me want to cry

Like basically any neurodivergent dungeon meshi fan, I see a lot of myself in the Touden siblings. But I was blindsided by just how much I suddenly related to Falin in this little comic from the adventure bible's complete version.

It's about the Touden siblings' differing relationships with their parents, and why Laios still holds their treatment of Falin against them, while Falin herself doesn't.

We know that Falin was isolated and ostraziced by their village after she saved Laios from a ghost, displaying her uncanny affinity for magic. Her parents, instead of defending her, sent her away, which angered Laios so much he ran way himself before Falin even left for magic school, hoping to make a living so he and Falin could live together alone.

He tells Marcile this, but when she goes to Falin, she says she sees things differently. Her father sent her to magic school to protect her form the rest of the village without having to cause a conflict. He didn't explain that, and we actually see her burst into tears when he says it.

But, well... Laios was gone for a year before Falin went to magic school, and everyone else in the village avoided her. The understanding Falin has with her parents to me looks like one borne out of necessity, she literally didn't have anyone else to talk to.

And this is where we get to the page that made me want to cry

Like I said, I relate to the Toudens because I'm neurodivergent myself. that feeling of suddenly realizing you're disliked, but not knowing what you did wrong or what you should have done instead? Yeah... that's one I recognize.

When I was around 9 years old, the same age Falin is in this comic, a bunch of kids in my class decided to make a "game" where you lost if you touched me. It was basically the 'cheese-touch' from diary of a wimpy kid, except I always had it and couldn't pass it along. They'd pretend I was poisonous or disgusting and run away from me screaming or gagging. The point was to make fun of me. But my autistic little 9 year old ass thought "Oh I get it! It's tag but I'm always it!" So I... played along. Running at a boy and having him fall on the ground screaming in fake pain because you tapped him is, in isolation, pretty funny.

It wasn't until months into the "game" that I realized it was meant to be meanspirited. That the reason I was the one who was always 'it' wasn't an arbritrary rule but the whole point. Because I was weird and gross. I wasn't in on the joke, I was the punchline.

Falin may have come to understand her parents' intentions, but she didn't always. The adventure bible actually tells us that she at first didn't even notice that the rest of their village disliked her. She clearly knows now, but she had to be told. So when her mom tried to exorcise her, she just saw it as an activity she got to do with a mother she usually didn't get to spend much time with because of her poor health. It's only Laios who notices something is wrong.

(Sidenote, Laios being hyper-aware of people's poor attitudes towards Falin but completely blindsided when he's in the same spot, like with Toshiro, is also very relatable as an eldest sibling)

It probably also took Falin months, until after her brother had left and she had no one but her parents, to realize why her mother had been doing all those things.

And I know they're not the same. Even misguidedly, Falin's mom was trying to help her, not make fun of her like those boys in my class. (Though, as a queer person who also cares a lot about the queercoding in Falin's storyline, a parent trying to 'exorcise' their child of a fundamental part of them the parent thinks is evil or corruptive? yeah... that's not perfectly wholesome)

But do you know what I did, when I finally figured out the game was always meant to make fun of me?

To me, it looked like I had a choice.

See, those boys eventually figured out I didn't understand that they were being mean to me. I'd laugh every time I managed to catch one of them, I was visibly having fun. And while it no doubt only made me more of a weirdo in their eyes, they never informed me that I shouldn't be enjoying myself. That the point was for me to feel hurt.

So now that I did know, I had a choice. I could either get upset, and let the insult land as it was supposed to. That wouldn't stop them, because making fun of me was the original goal. Or I could ignore it and go on as usual. They had already accepted that I didn't get it, and they weren't gona stop me from having fun, so why should I?

And the thing is that I had... one friend, in that whole class. One person who actually liked talking to me and hanging out with me. I was lonely. And the 'game' provided me with another social interaction, mean-spirited as it was, that I desperately needed. And it was so delightfully simple. Navigating actual friendships as a kid with autism and adhd was so fucking complicated, and I'd never know when I might break an inivisble rule. But I knew the rules to the game perfectly!

Sometimes, if I was chasing one of them, the others would trap him and hold him down so I could tap him. In those moments it actually did kind of feel like I was playing with them, rather than against them. And it didn't change much, they didnt start actually liking me. But they were willing to roll with the fact that I wasn't upset, and I took advantage of that because I needed to.

So you can look at Falin seeing the best in her parents as her being naïve, but I look at this page and I see myself, at first unable to differentiate between playing and being made fun of. And then later, when I did see the difference, deciding not to get mad about it because that'd mean losing that social interaction, and I couldn't afford to.

Like I said, Falin probably first realized this in the year she spent with her brother gone, and everyone else avoiding her like the plague. If she refused to talk to her parents, like Laios did, she'd have no one left.

I see a lot of people relating to the fight between Laios and Toshiro. that frustration when you realize someone you thougth was your friend actually hates you, and they never said anything, never gave you a chance to fix it because you had no idea that you were even doing something wrong! And I can see that, too. But sometimes, when people don't fully hate you, it feels better to go along with the pretending. Because adressing it won't fix it. Because the problem isn't a specific behaviour, it's you. And if they're willing to tolerate you, despite the fact that it's you, then you'll take it. Because other people do hate you, so this is the best you'll get.

#dungeon meshi #dungeon meshi meta #falin touden #laios touden #neurodivegent #autism #adhd #long post #this one got REAL personal oops

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yourfavoritehouseplant · 1 year ago

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I watched James Somerton's final video, and all I got was this 6 page document

As soon as I learned his final unreleased video was on Revolutionary Girl Utena, I knew I had to hate watch it. I didn't know that I'd spend the following 4 hours making a comprehensive doc on everything I hated about it. But here we are.

The TLDR (is this too long to be a TLDR?)

The intro section, as well as Part 2, are directly plagiarized from wikipedia. The rest is unclear.

He makes a “haha this show is so weird right guys” joke 10 different times

He reads Anthy as so emotionally stunted she literally has to be taught how to think for herself, and believes that being the rose bride makes her feel good

He says that his reading is ‘vastly different” from the rest of the community, before boldly stating that this is because he sees it as a “deeply allegorical and symbolic story”

He sees the sexual abuse as “not to be taken literally”

Insists that the show be separated into parts that are strictly literal and strictly allegorical for the entirety of parts 3 and 4, before making the contradictory move of analyzing characters as allegories during part 5

The only characters that get dedicated sections are Akio and Dios, who he doesn’t believe are the same person.

He says Dios gets his powers by “deflowering women”

He calls Akio, known child predator, a chaotic bisexual

Uses 14 year old SA survivor Anthy’s passive personality to make a joke about her being a bottom

His final point is that Utena was the real prince all along

There are no citations

Anyway, full version for people who hate themselves under the cut. With time codes, because I cite my sources.

Part 1: Intro

This entire section is almost exclusively quoted from the Wikipedia article for Revolutionary Girl Utena. Words have been changed, but the order at which certain topics come up is not. Highlights include:

0:56 In his introduction of Be-Papas, lists the founding members in literally the exact same order as Wikipedia.

1:40-2:00 His list of Be-Papas previous works is lifted entirely from wikipedia, only with the words changed. This leads to a strange moment at 1:52 where he claims Be-papas ‘lent their talents to’ Neon Genesis Evangelion, a show which started production at least a year before Be-papas was founded. On the wikipedia article for Utena, this is instead referring to the previous work of Shinya Hasegawa and Yōji Enokido

4:23 he uses a quote by Yūichirō Oguro describing the production as a “tug of war”. He seems to have lifted this in its entirety from Wikipedia, as he does not cite the actual source it is from (the box set companion book, btw)

As for James Somerton originals, at 0:44 he claims that out of all magical girl series,”none to my knowledge have been more discussed and dissected than the 1997 series Revolutionary Girl Utena” He will go back on this at 5:05, where he states that “Sailor Moon takes the lion’s share of discussion” in regard to influential magical girl anime

Part 2: Part 1

(At least I know I’m not funny, unlike James Somerton)

Speaking of which. Here is every single time he makes a “wow this show is sooooo weird you guys” joke: 6:00, 8:50, 10:40, 10:58, 13:46, 17:07, 24:16, 30:34, 41:19, 48:01

Here’s every time the punchline to the joke is the existence of Nanami, a character who he otherwise completely disregards: 10:56, 12:05, 16:22, 42:40

6:16 Claims that the “Apocalypse saga” and “Akio Ohtori saga’ are two names for the same several episodes, depending on the release. This is untrue. Instead, different releases either only have the Apocalypse saga, or split the episodes into an Akio Ohtori saga and then the Apocalypse saga.

7:58 Claims Utena intervening on Anthy’s behalf begins the first duel. While this happens in the movie, Touga intervenes in the scene he uses clips from (like literally right after the shot he uses in the video). Utena only gets drawn into the duels when Wakaba’s love note to Saionji is posted. Youtuber Noralities’ Utena video also gets this wrong, which makes me wonder if this was copied.

9:09 Claims Akio’s “End of the World” moniker is actually more closely translated to “Apocalypse”. In reality, the translation moves away from a more apocalyptic reading, with 世界の果て (Sekai no hate) apparently translating closer to “the furthest reach of a known world” or “edge of the world”. (Love the implications of this translation, but I digress)

9:10 As can be assumed from the previous point, this means I can’t find any sources that point to them not using the title “apocalypse” for religious reasons

10:10 Uses Anthy’s extreme passivity under her Rose bride persona to make a top/bottom joke. I’m gonna repeat this in case you’re just skimming. He uses a trait that likely stems from years of abuse, (possibly exaggerated by the persona Anthy uses to manipulate people), and uses it to call her a bottom.

He also just doesn’t seem to understand how the whole point of Utena constantly telling Anthy that she's just a normal girl who should make more friends is framed as Utena imposing her will on Anthy, just as much as the previous Engaged have done.

11:54 Apologies in advance for my most “um, actually!” point yet, but technically his statement that Anthy stops being host to the Sword of Dios is wrong. Akio literally pulls a sword out of her chest in the final duel. It's a more evil-looking sword of Dios, granted.

13:02 !!! CANTARELLA SCENE ALERT !!! He interprets it as them fighting over Akio?? Which like. I will allow people to have their own interpretations of vague and symbolic scenes. I will. I swear. This is not technically incorrect. It just makes me want to eat my own intestines.

14:44 Bad Anthy take #1: He states Anthy “is emotionally stunted to the point where she needs people to make decisions for her because she does not know how to think for herself” This ignores several moments of Anthy clearly making her own choices throughout the show, including the suicide attempt Somerton mentions about a minute prior. This also strips Anthy of what little agency she has throughout the story, usually exerted through messing with Utena or Nanami. (The fact that she repeatedly makes choices that contribute to her own abuse is, in my opinion, one of the most interesting parts of her character, and it's a shame that Summerton’s ‘reading’ of the story completely disregards that)

Additionally, he once again reads Utena ‘urging Anthy to think for herself” in the first arc as an unambiguously good move, and not as something critiqued in the show.

14:52 Summerton reads the Swords of hatred as symbolizing men’s hatred specifically. Again, I’m trying not to completely disregard differing interpretations to a show like Utena, but this feels very simplistic, especially considering the harm we see aimed towards Anthy by other women

16:42 Here he claims that his reading of the story seems to be “vastly different” from the bulk of Utena discourse. What is this reading? That the show shouldn’t be read literally. Or, in his words, “[we can interpret] Revolutionary Girl Utena as a deeply allegorical and symbolic story about the struggles of coming of age amidst widespread institutional corruption in a high school and which describes a passive culture of inaction in regard to brazen instances of domestic exploitation in which there is not only a question about the caporeality of the events transpiring but also which events can be taken for granted and which events are meant to signify abstract sociological institutions.” The idea that he believes this is in any way a new reading of the material honestly baffles me.

Part 3: Part 2

17:48 through 18:50 differently quotes the Wikipedia article for postmodernism. He even makes a joke at 17:55 about Wikipedia. Please kill me.

The first three themes he lists at 19:11 are just the three main themes listed on the Revolutionary Girl Utena Wikipedia page. What was that about a “vastly different” reading, James?

You’re gonna have to take my word for it, but this section is so short because it's just him talking about the various ways the story can’t be taken literally. He does, ironically, call this a hot take.

Part 4: Part 3

Here’s where the reading falls apart folks

At 23:15, he states that some things in Utena are allegorically coded, while others are to be taken literally. This is true. However, he seems to take this to mean that some parts of the show are Strictly Literal, while others are Strictly Allegorical for things going on in the Literal World.

This is apparently why he prefers the Anime to the Movie, where there basically is no separation between the Literal and Allegorical

This take is bizarre to me for several reasons, but here is my favorite. At several points, he mentions how Revolutionary Girl Utena is a work of Magical Realism. Magical Realism is literally defined by its blending of the “literal” and “allegorical”, the mix of fantastical elements in a mundane, realistic setting. This idea of the impossibility of a blurred line, that Utena must either have lore where the magic is all real and means nothing, or dedicated allegory segments quarantined from the rest of the story, is contrary to the very idea of Magical Realism.

I can’t help but wonder if Somerton took his mentions of Magical realism from a previous work, due to how little it is consistent with his final argument. Either way, this section suggests a great lack of creativity in his analysis, a shame for such a creative work.

24:36: Shiori slander, for those who care

After this he gets really worked up about people assuming symbolism in everything, even when the author ‘doesn’t make it clear something is symbolic’. He shuts down a reading of a shot in the Lord of the Rings. Miley Cyrus is there? Very The Curtains Were Blue of him.

28:22 Claims that Wakaba is the key to telling where the Strictly Literal segments end and the Strictly Allegorical segments begin. He states that, under this lens, deeply personal moments of character suffering such as all of the sexual abuse and Anthy’s suicide attempt (which he literally cites) should be read as symbolic and be “approached with uncertainty rather than confusion”. (28:24-29:13)

This also somewhat falls apart when you consider Wakaba is the jeep in the movie's car chase

And then he rants about people not liking his Attack on Titan video for a bit. Since its potential symbolism also doesn't follow hard enough rules to be symbolism. Once again, the separation of “fact vs allegory” I haven’t watched AOT, so that's all I’ll say.

Part 5: Part 4

Thank god this part is short. Much like Dios’ on-screen presence.

32:55 Makes the extremely bold claim that Dios is not Akio. As in, never even became Akio. because Dios is Strictly Allegorical.

Just to be a pedant, this is pretty explicitly disproven in the show

Confusingly, both earlier and later he will address these two as the same character.

33:04 he also explains the root of Akio’s name in a tone that suggests this is supplemental information and not like. Literally something he explains out loud in the show?

Part 6: Part 5

This section is nearly entirely about Akio Ohtori. I would like to note that him and Dios are the only characters with dedicated segments.

38:30 The part where he states that Dios gets his powers from deflowering women.

38:46 Claims, once again, that Akio’s abuse of Anthy “may not be literal”.

38:59 “the instance of exploitation here is used because assault has deep roots as indicating that akio's gender is the source of his imbalance” THE ASSAULT IS ABOUT AKIO NOW???

39:45 Bad Anthy take #2: “Anthy’s conformity to the Rose bride is based around the fact that she feels good being subservient because this is the only thing in her life that has ever brought her any kind of positive reward”. This is a direct quote. Anyway, I can’t think of any instances in the show where Anthy’s subservience gives her a positive reward, except maybe when she’s intentionally using it to manipulate others. As for her feeling good being the rose bride. She tries to commit suicide. Dude.

Side tangent, but isn’t this exactly what Akio says during the final 2 episodes? That Anthy enjoys being a witch? Is the main villain, who consistently says things during that very episode that are blatantly false, our source of information for this take? I guess so, since this is the dedicated Akio section.

At 40:20 he decides to introduce the concept of Anthy, Akio, and Utena as stand-ins for wider concepts, which is antithetical to his approach in analysis beforehand

Part 7: Part 6

42:40 he finally acknowledges that he’s been spending too much time talking about Akio, and literally no time on characters like Nanami

46:10 states that Utena’s exclusive motivation “is to protect Anthy from the predatorial intentions of the other dualists”, which disregards the fact, which she states herself, that she was largely participating in the duels and protecting Anthy to feel like a prince

48:04 The part where he says that Akio has ‘chaotic Bi vibes’ in regards to him sleeping with Touga, who is 17 and implied to be a long-term victim

Part 8: Part 7

54:01: His concluding point is that Utena was the real prince all along.

In true Somerton fashion, the video then ends over a scrolling wall of patrons, with not a single citation in sight.

#the autism won again you guys #revolutionary girl utena #james somerton #shoujo kakumei utena #utena #anthy #hbomberguy

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fruitjoos · 3 months ago

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do you trust me?

bully!patrick x reader

summary: bully patrick…. leads to [redacted] 18+

warnings friendly banter, light smut + i’m a little rusty so… be gentle

you met patrick when you were ten. he lived next door, just a skinny kid with dirty sneakers who always wanted to ride bikes. you didn’t mind. the two of you were inseparable then, tethered by boredom and proximity. you got older, though. things shift. kids don’t stay innocent, not for long.

by high school, patrick had drifted, caught up with the boys who reeked of arrogance and cigarettes, the ones who slammed lockers too hard and swaggered through the halls like they owned them. you were still you. quiet, stubborn. not the kind of person who backed down, but never loud about it either. when patrick started cracking jokes at your expense, you told yourself it didn’t matter. it shouldn’t, but god, did it sting. the way he laughed too loud, punched your shoulder too hard, joined his new friends in making you the punchline.

the first time he called you "freak" it landed like a rock to the chest. right there in the middle of a crowd, his voice sharp, eyes avoiding yours. you tried to brush it off, tried to pretend that the patrick from years ago was still buried somewhere under the snide smirks and dirty jokes. but when he started pulling your hair, burping in your face, it was harder to believe.

then there was the history project. the one that felt like a joke before it even started. partners, the teacher said, and you hoped, quietly, fiercely, that patrick wouldn’t be assigned to you. but life has a cruel sense of humor, doesn’t it? your name with his, as if the universe couldn’t resist rubbing salt in the wound. his groan reached your ears before yours even escaped your throat, and when he asked to switch partners, the heat rose to your cheeks. it was like you were something to be ashamed of, something small and pitiful.

after school, he found you at your locker, the same locker he used to stand next to, back when he wasn’t so... different. "what's up, loser," he muttered, shoulder checking you as if it were nothing, like you hadn’t spent summers kicking soccer balls in the backyard, sharing popsicles and trading comic books. now, all he had for you was sarcasm and a half hearted, "i’ll be over at six to work on the project."

he didn’t even wait for a reply. just walked off, hands shoved in his pockets like the conversation was already forgotten. his friends watched him go, smirking, like you were just another part of their cruel little game.

you got home, trying to shake off the sour taste the day left in your mouth. your dad asked how school was, but it was a formality. he wasn’t really listening, not past your shoulder, at least. "good," you lied, because the truth wasn’t worth the effort.

then the doorbell rang. you knew it was him before you even checked. he used to come over without knocking, back when things were simpler. now, it felt wrong, like he didn’t belong here anymore, yet he walked in like he still did, brushing past you without so much as a glance. the strap of his bag almost hit your face. typical.

your mom lit up like it was some reunion, like she didn’t notice the shift between you. “patrick, sweetheart,” she cooed, pulling him into a hug, her hand smoothing over his curls like she used to. it made your stomach twist, hearing her treat him like he hadn’t changed. but he had, hadn’t he?

you didn’t wait around for their small talk. upstairs felt safer, quieter. patrick followed, like he always had a right to, like he didn’t need to ask permission. he knew the way. he’d been in your room a hundred times. back then, when he was your friend. now, though, he was just the guy who sat behind you in class, yanked your ponytail when he wanted answers, and whispered insults under his breath.

funny how things turn out.

time dragged, the minutes between words heavy, like even the clock didn’t want to be there. patrick sat slouched at your desk, picking at his fingernails, bored already. he mentioned he only had an hour. just enough time before he had to meet his friends at the dump. a dive bar downtown, the kind of place that smelled like sweat and stale beer. you raised an eyebrow, asking if he was even old enough to get in, knowing full well he wasn’t. he pulled out a fake ID with a flourish, like it was something to be proud of. 23. five years older than his real age. you shook your head, a bitter scoff escaping before you could stop it.

"what?" he snapped, catching the edge in your voice. "stop being such a goody two shoes, will you?" he leaned in, voice dropping low, sharp. "no one likes a prude." his words, hissed in your own room, your space, hit harder than you thought they would. this wasn’t the boy who used to make you laugh until you cried. this wasn’t the patrick who snuck out to the park with you at midnight, just to talk about stupid dreams and shared your secrets with.

you could feel the tears gathering, uninvited, in the corners of your eyes. you didn’t want to cry. not in front of him. not when he’d see it as some kind of victory. but it was like he could sense it, the moment your breath hitched. he sighed, like the weight of your sadness was too much for him to carry. “don’t,” he muttered, rubbing the back of his neck. “don’t cry, okay?”

but it was too late, and the first tear slipped down your cheek. you sniffled, wiping at your face quickly, trying to pretend it wasn’t happening, but his tone changed. "i’m sorry," he said, almost too soft to believe. he said it again, as if repetition might make it real. “i’m sorry. i didn’t mean it.”

for a few long moments, neither of you said anything. you sat there, on the edge of your bed, while he fidgeted with the zipper on his jacket, the silence growing thicker, heavier.

then he spoke, too casually, too easily. “i know how to make you feel better.”

“lay back,” he said, his voice firmer than you expected, almost a command. you blinked, caught off guard. “what?” you asked, still wiping the tears from your cheeks, not sure if you heard him right.

“do you trust me?” he asked, and his eyes had that look again, the one that used to be familiar, the one that always dared you to go along with whatever half baked idea he had.

“no,” you scoffed, voice thick, still bitter from his words earlier. you didn’t even hesitate, but your chest tightened a little, because there was a time when that question wouldn’t have needed to be asked.

he tilted his head, the silent gesture pressing the question again, almost like a challenge. you sighed, exhaling the fight from your lungs. “fine,” you muttered, lying back from the edge of the bed. you didn’t know why you were giving in. maybe a part of you still believed that under all the rough edges, he was still the patrick you used to know.

his eyes scanned over your room for a second before grabbing something. “put this on,” he said, handing it to you.

you looked down at it, blinking in confusion. a pink sleeping mask, silky and soft to the touch. ridiculous, absurd. you stared at it, then at him, trying to make sense of the moment. “what... are you doing?” you asked, more to yourself than him.

he didn’t answer, just nodded toward the mask. you could tell he was waiting, watching, like the whole thing was some inside joke you weren’t in on yet. for reasons you couldn’t explain, you did as he said, slipping the mask over your head. maybe you were tired. maybe you just didn’t want to argue anymore. or maybe, somewhere deep down, you did still trust him, even if you hated admitting it.

you blinked, confused, the world blurring slightly behind the mask. there was no sound, no movement from patrick, just this heavy stillness. the quiet stretched on, unsettling, until suddenly, you felt his hands lifting up your skirt—firm, steady, grasping your thighs. he pulled them forward, guiding your legs around his shoulders.

“patrick?” your voice came out small, the confusion clear, but you couldn’t see his face, couldn’t read whatever expression he wore. just as his name left your lips, you felt him move, closing the space between you. and then, unexpectedly, a cold, slimy glob landed with a wet splat on your cunt. his lips met your soft, surprisingly already soaked pussy. soft, warmer than you imagined, pressing gently but with a certainty that made your heart lurch.

it was so sudden, so out of place in the middle of this strange, awkward moment that your mind couldn’t catch up to your body. for a second, you froze, not sure what to do or think. this was patrick. the same boy who had spent the past year mocking you, pulling at your hair, calling you names. but now, here he was, lapping up your juices, his breath mingling with the heat radiating from your core, like none of that had happened. like this was the only thing that mattered.

his velvety tongue swirled around your pink, swollen nub. your body jolted as his teeth nipped at it. your mouth hung open as you gripped onto the sheets, trying to ground yourself. the slurping sounds he made sent shivers up your spine, “fuck.” you gasped, almost uncontrollably. “i’m sorry,” he whispered, pressing gentle kisses against your clit. almost like he was in love with it. in love with you. “i didn’t mean to make you cry.” he added, his warm breath adding to your pleasure. he asked if you forgive him and all you could do was nod, whimpering a small, “yes.” your eyebrows knitting together in satisfaction. his tongue flicked over your clit vigorously, making you come within seconds.

your hole clenched rapidly as you tried to catch your breath. your fingers tangled in a few of his curls. “when did you learn how to do that?” you panted, eyes still covered. he shrugged as if you could see him before pulling the mask from over your eyes. your cheeks instantly flushing when reality hit you. your ex best friend, bully or whatever just sucked an orgasm out of you. for fun. to please you. to make you forgive him. because he still cares, clearly.

he pressed his lips that were smothered in your liquids against your own. the taste of yourself soaking into your tongue. “you were my first experiment,” he murmured, his voice low. before you could process the weight of his words, he leaned in again, pressing another soft, almost calculated peck against your trembling lips.

#challengers #challengers fanfic #patrick zweig x reader #patrick zweig #patrick zweig smut #challengers smut #fruitjoos do you trust me?

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uzurakis · 7 months ago

Note

Hi! I like your writing about jjk men reaction to y/n reader breaking up, but would they react the same if the reason for break up is y/n falling out of love? 🥹

YOU? FALLING OUT OF LOVE?

featuring: gojo satoru. fushiguro megumi. nanami kento. choso kamo.

n. yall rlly like to hurt yourselves 😭 godd the amount of angst i have in my inbox. hope this one pains you enough then </3

“we need to talk..”

GOJO SATORU. he looked up from his phone, that stupid smile dancing on his lips. “uh-oh, that sounds serious. what did i do this time? forget to take out the trash?”

trying to maintain your composure, you shook your head. you usually would lecture him about that, but not this time. it’s far more different than forgetting to take out the trash or not washing the dishes. “no, it’s not that. it’s… it’s about us.”

gojo’s smile faltered slightly, but he remained playful. “us? oh, let me guess. you’re secretly in love with my best friend, right? this is just one of those elaborate pranks. you should delete tiktok, i think it’s—“

“satoru, i’m falling out of love with you.” you took another deep breath, held in it for some amount of time to see his reaction, feeling tears welling up in your eyes.

“great, just what i needed to hear today. so funny, babe.” for a moment, he just stared at you, as if waiting for the punchline. then, when it didn’t come, he laughed nervously. “you’re kidding, right? this is a joke. you can’t be serious.”

“i’ve been feeling this way for a while now..”

his laughter faded, replaced by a look of confusion and hurt. “no, no, no. that can’t be true, baby. you’re just having a bad day or something, right? we can work through this.”

you felt a tear slip down your cheek, and you wiped it away quickly. “it’s not just a bad day, satoru. i don’t feel the same way i used to.”

he stood up, pacing the room, his hands running through his hair in frustration. “this doesn’t make any sense. we were fine. we are fine. you can’t just… fall out of love like that, right?”

“tell me i’m wrong, please..”

FUSHIGURO MEGUMI. for a moment, megumi just stared at you, his eyes wide with surprise, mouth slightly opened; like he intended to say something but immediately got eaten by the weight of the situation. then, his expression hardened, and he looked down, his hands clenching into fists. “i… i don’t understand,” he said quietly, his voice devoid of emotion.

the silence that followed was suffocating. you could see the pain in his eyes, even though he was trying to hide it. “megumi, i’m so sorry. i didn’t know how this happened, i.. never wanted this to happen..”

“no..” he shook his head, still looking at the ground, “what changed? did.. did i do something wrong?”

you felt tears prick at the corners of your eyes, but you blinked them away. “i tried to make it work. i really did. but i can’t force my feelings, it’s eating me alive too, gumi..”

megumi nodded slowly, his gaze distant. “it’s my fault i didn’t realize you felt that way. just, why didn’t you tell me sooner?”

guilt and regret struck a chord deep within you. the pain in his eyes, the genuine hurt in his voice, the way his shoulders slumped slightly, and it tore at you. it was clear that he blamed himself, and that realization only made your own emotions more compound.

you reached out to touch his hand, but he pulled away, the gesture making your heart ache even more. “i don’t, i didn’t know how to say it to you.. how could i? i care about you so much, megumi. but i can’t lie to you or to myself.”

“if that’s how you really feel, i guess there’s nothing i can do to change your mind.” he stood up abruptly, not sparing a glance at you, not even once. “so, we.. we just… go our separate ways now?”

“…sorry, i.. i need some time alone.”

NANAMI KETO. nanami just stared at you for a brief while, his expression unreadable. he nodded slowly after that, his eyes becoming thoughtful. “i see,” he said in a quiet manner. “i guess we’ve both changed.”

you felt a lump form in your throat. “i never wanted this to happen, kento.. never once i even thought about this.”

he reached across the table and took your hand in his, his touch warm and reassuring. “it’s not your fault,” he said softly despite the circumstances you’re throwing him in, “people change, feelings change. it’s a part of life.”

“but i feel like i’m letting you down. like i’m betraying everything we had. i don’t want that, kento.”

“you shouldn’t burden yourself with guilt, sweetheart. this isn’t something you can control, and it’s not fair to blame yourself for it.”

looking down at your intertwined hands, you felt some kind of sorrow and relief. “you’ve always been so understanding, kento.. i don’t deserve this.”

he squeezed your hand gently. “we shared something special, and i’ll always cherish that. but if your heart is no longer in it, then it’s better to be honest.”

“we can certainly try. it will take time, but i’d rather have you in my life in some capacity than not at all.”

CHOSO KAMO. choso’s face fell, a look of shock and pain replacing his usual demeanor. “no, please,” he said, voice desperate, reaching out for you. “let’s talk about this, please. there has to be a way to fix things, love?”

it crushed your heart to see the agony in his eyes. “choso, it’s not something you can just fix. it’s how i feel.”

“is it something i did? how can i make things right?” he pleaded, every word cracking with emotion.

“it’s not about you. it’s just… i don’t feel the same way anymore.”

choso took a step closer. “i still love you,” he murmured, hanging his whole existence on it. “i don’t want to lose you.”

your heart ached at his words, knowing how much you were hurting him. “i know, choso. and i’m so sorry,” you said, your voice also breaking. “but i can’t change how i feel.”

“please,” he whispered, reaching out to take your hand and pulled you into a tight embrace. “don’t give up on us.”

“i just want you to be happy,” he murmured into your hair. “even if it’s not with me.”

@uzurakis

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fanfics-i-find-here · 25 days ago

Text

Do I know you? Part 2

Jason Todd X Reader

Synopsis: Jason, not Red Hood, “checks” on you. Cue the shortest/ longest conversation you have had with the man.

Or in other words, is this flirting?

Notes: There is no planned plot for this if anyone can tell. Just running on vibes.

Part 1, Part 3, Part 4, Part 5

Your presumption of a long night was regrettably accurate. The annoyance of it all makes you want to chuck your alarm against the wall. But alas, being an adult mattered more and you need money, so work it is. You pray for it to be a busy day so you can forget your embarrassment from the night before.

Clocking into work makes you confident in the fact that it will be busy. You slide into your routine as a waitress at Jackie’s Books and Coffee, greeting customers and delivering drinks and pastries to them. You chat with a few of the regulars as they come in, and you listen as they yap about their lives. As you make another round, you greet another regular.

His name was Jason and that’s all you really knew. He wasn’t like many of the other customers who liked to talk about anything and everything to you. He usually only got coffee and read a book. The one time he did actually talk to you was when you mentioned you had never read a Jane Austen book. It was like that was the only thing that mattered in the world. He ranted at you for 15 minutes about it and you didn’t have the heart to step away. He was cute when he was passionate.

He sat down at his usual table and pulled out a book. You went to work with his order, he always got the same thing. You sat the cup in front of him and asked, “What’s the book for the day?”

You try to glance at the cover but find the front cover blank, a fancy hardcover. Not finding the answer there you meet his gaze to wait for his response. You're startled for a moment by the familiarity of his features. Of course, his features were familiar to you, he was a regular but there was something different this time around. A scar on his lip and his cheek-

“Dracula” your thoughts are cut off by his voice, suddenly strangely familiar too, and you focus in on the conversation.

You smile, “I actually have read that one.”

You are half tempted to add, might be better than Jane Austen, but you decided you still want to work for the next half hour. You settle on, “Hollywood definitely got that one wrong, so much for the undead being sexy.” You joke.

His laugh comes out a little startled and you’re proud of the accomplishment. He usually looks so sullen in his corner booth, although that might just be because he’s so focused on his book.

“I don’t know, Hollywood might be onto something.” He says it like it’s an inside joke, but you feel like you missed the punchline.

“Maybe,” you say with a polite laugh, “Did you want anything else?” you ask.

He shakes his head. Not a huge shocker, he never wants anything but his drink and his book.

“Just let me know if you do.” You walk away slowly as you try to push down the weird familiar feeling you’re having all of a sudden. You check in with a few customers and, with a lull in commotion you settle into a chair next to the register. Bless Jackie for having one, your feet slowly starting to ache as the end of your shift draws near. Darla, one of the other waitresses comes to stand close to you. She leans in with a conspiratory look.

“So, you get his number?” she questions, her Gothamite accent heavy. Your head whips to look at her and you almost knock noses.

“What?” you try to keep your tone neutral, but your tone pitches up. Her lips twist into a grin and you’d think it evil if you didn’t already know her. Darla was nearly 50 years old, and she reminded you of a self-proclaimed “Fun Aunt” who liked to be in on all the gossip and had no sense of personal space. She had been goading you to date someone, anyone, just so she could be all up in your business. Because according to her, you were the most boring person she’d ever met.

“The hottie, did you get his number?” she asks again as she pulls out a compact mirror to brush some fly-aways from her face.

“First of all, I still don’t know who you’re talking about.” You do but that’s neither here nor there. “Second, you can’t just call customer’s Hotties, Darla, that weird.”

She scoffs and snaps her compact closed. “All right, Scarface over there. Did you get his number?”

You practically jump at her to cover her mouth. “Darla!”

She pushes your hand away with a grin. “Don’t worry Baby doll. It makes him look hot in a rugged way.”

“Darla, I swear-“you're cut off by a throat clearing. You turn to see a college student awkwardly waiting at the register. Your face flushes and you drop your hands from Darla and through on a customer service smile.

“Hi, sorry about that. How can I help you?” You manage to stay away from Darla for the rest of your shift, checking on customers probably more than necessary. It's 5 o’clock when your shift finally ends. You brush by Darla to clock out and she follows you.

“You gonna answer my question or not?” Ever persistent for an older woman.

“No, Darla, I did not get Jason’s number” You pointedly use his name, so she won’t use Scarface or Hottie again.

“Oh, First name basis.” She teases.

You roll your eyes and pull off your apron to hang it up. You turn and look at her.

“Goodbye Darla,” you say sweetly with a too cheesy smile. It's her turn to roll her eyes as she goes back to work. You collect your purse and jacket and head for the front door of the shop. The early fall weather not having kicked in yet, you carry your jacket on your arm. Focused on pulling your purse over your head, you nearly run into a mass.

“Oh Sorry,” you say as you take a step back.

“No, you’re okay. I shouldn’t have bullied my way in front of you.” A deep voice speaks. You look up and meet blue-green eyes. Jason.

“I hardly think someone so passionate about Jane Austen could do any Bullying” You see Jason flush a little at the comment but don’t say anything. He holds the front door open for you. You thank him as you hurriedly shuffle through the open door. He follows you out onto the warm sidewalk. Assuming your conversation is done you head down the sidewalk with your arms crossed in front of you holding your jacket. As you walk you become very conscious of the man next to you. You glance at him curiously but don’t comment.

You take your time walking with him silently. You're not in a rush to get home, darkness still a few hours away. You should be worried. You’re not though. Jason has never struck you as a bad guy. Call it energy or vibe or what have you (ranting about Jane Austen). He just wasn’t bad. Intimidating? Yes, but not bad. As you walk you give some subtle side glances. He was very… Large. You didn’t know how else to describe him. Nearly a whole head taller than you and muscular. Yeah, he could definitely pick you up and carry you. You flush, not that that mattered. Your eyes get drawn back to his face. You know those scars; you swear up and down that it's not just because he’s a regular. They’ve never stuck out to you like this, and you can’t figure out why. In your (not so) subtle side-eye, you meet his gaze. He’s already smiling at you, but you don’t linger on it dropping your gaze to the concrete.

“Heading home?” He asks, tilting his head toward you.

You look up to meet his gaze, intense in the stare and unsure if he's just like that or dissecting you. This is the longest amount of time you’ve spent actually near him without tending to customers.

“Uh, yeah?” you ask yourself. Of course, you're going home; where else would you go? But why would you tell him that? You don’t think Jason would do anything bad to you; he is still, at most, an acquaintance, and you don’t really know him. (Not that it matters considering you let a literal stranger into your home the night before.) If he senses your hesitation and worry, he doesn’t comment on it.

“I wish I was.” He admits but quickly adds on, “Going to my home, not yours. That would be weird, I don’t really know you.” His voice drops quieter as he trails off. He rubs at the back of his neck, a light flush on his cheeks. The man in a flustered state must give you some courage.

“Yeah, that would be weird,” you tease, “Although maybe not a bad thing.” You quiet for a moment and think is this good flirting?

“If you're not going home, then where are you going?” You ask both curious about the answer and if it’ll explain why he's still walking with you.

His flush darkens and he mumbles for a moment and stuffs his hands into the pockets of his leather jacket. Leather Jacket…

“Family required dinner,” he says it like it’s the worst thing in the entire world, sitting next to nuclear weapons and climate change.

“That sounds fun” You try to keep a neutral tone because a family dinner does sound fun, to you, but he, apparently, thinks otherwise.

“Oh, loads of it,” he says with a scowl.

You decide a variety of things at that moment. First, he was unfairly attractive. Scowling should not look that good. Second, you want to stop him from scowling, a sadness sitting just behind his eyes. Thirdly, Darla was, unfortunately, correct. You should get this guy's number.

“at least tell me there's dessert.” You ask teasingly. Your inquiry is enough to chase away the scowl and you smile at the fact.

“Only the best homemade cookies in existence” he responds with a smile.

“At least there's something good.” You slow your walk as you come to the corner where your apartment building sits. You don’t want to give away that you live here, but you don’t want to start wandering around the streets of Gotham with him either. As it turns out, your overthinking is unnecessary.

“This is me.” He states as he walks to a parked motorcycle right in front of the building. You can't help but stare.

“Will you make it home safe all alone?” he asks like he already knows the answer. It takes you a moment to answer, distracted as he pulls a helmet out of the back seat of the bike, preparing to put it on. The leather made more sense now.

“Oh, yeah, yeah, it'll be no problem. I don’t live far.” You gesture further down the street, where you definitely did not live. He nods and smiles knowingly as he slips the helmet on.

“Okay see you later, sweetheart.” He says as he slings a leg over the bike, starting. You stare, again, at the denim of his jeans stretching over his legs nicely. He gives you a wave before taking off down the street, turning a corner. You stand and stare at the spot he had just been for much longer than you should have. You let a quiet “Bye” leave your lips despite him being long gone.

You finally turn around to your apartment building. How convenient that was. You pet one of the stray cats that sit on the steps as you climb them and enter the building, thinking Am I missing something?

Other Note: Thank you for all the love for the first part. It inspired me to keep going. I hope this makes some kind of sense.

#jason todd x reader #red hood x reader #fanfics-i-find-here #Kandywrites #do i know you?

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nikosheba · 5 months ago

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ok not to come back after 6 months with a new fandom and i'm sure someone has pointed this out before but. but. but.

I just want to point out two small differences in "Falsettos!" 1993 LA Cast (and 1994 Broadway, they're staged the same way) and "Falsettos!" 2016 in The Baseball Game, in the sense of how far the WORLD has come in the intervening 23 years.

"I love baseball." In the 1993 version that I saw, this sentence by Whizzer was possibly the biggest punchline of the evening.

Whereas in the 2016, no laughs at all, it's not weird that he likes baseball, why would it be?

Even though Whizzer is arguably swishier in 2016 it's not a given that him liking baseball is a JOKE.

The second thing hit me even harder, which is - when Whizzer teaches Jason to swing, in the 90s it was done from several feet away.

But in 2016?

And it's just - you could not show a gay man even platonically, paternally touching a male child in ANY WAY in the 90s. But in the 2016, it doesn't raise any flags at all. He's just a dad helping his clueless kid play baseball.

i guess i'm alive and this is Falsettos posting!!!!

#falsettos #whizzer brown

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wannaeatramyeon · 6 months ago

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Jake Kim x Reader: Right Person

G/N. 5.2k. Childhood friends to lovers, sorta canon compliant.

The first time you meet Jake, you are the right person at the right place.

Almost.

Both precocious pre-teens and families already intertwined.

Your father does something with his father, but that always seems to be the case, everyone knows Gapryong. Works with him in one way or another. He has all sorts of connections.

The peculiar thing though, at least to Jake's pre-pubescent mind, was that he met you.

Few of his father's underlings or 'business partners' have a child that tag along. Fewer still that are seen as an equal.

Apart from being told to call him Oppa, you don't have any other formalities to follow. You stick your tongue out at him, tease him, laugh at his jokes. He in turn shares his candy and sticks of gum and saves all his best punchlines for you.

Minseong, or Auntie as you call her, always smiles at you; calling you precious and talking about how you and Jake would be a great match to join the families.

That could have been a possibility. If fate had been kinder his childhood crush could have blossomed into puppy love and everyone would have been thrilled at the development.

But before anything was allowed to flourish, fate had other plans.

Gapryong is murdered, and your and Jake's life take a different course.

You attend the wake, offering your condolences and saying all the right things in these unfortunate occasions.

Holding Auntie's hand in yours and telling her you're sorry. In the quiet of his bedroom, you wrap your arms around Jake's shaking body, rubbing circles into his back, kissing his forehead, even as he tries to hold it together.

For a brief moment of time after, you and Jake are like glue. Joined at the hips, never seen without the other.

Staying by his side as he gets his irezumi tattoos, oohing and aahing as he unveils the healed ink to you. Pouting as he shoots up like bamboo, puberty taking hold; growing tall and gangly and a full head or three taller than you. Walking each other home from middle school, him waiting for you outside your school gates. Dropping the bombshell that he has to stay behind for another year; besotted as you lecture him about his awful grades.

Eventually, time moves on.

Your family find better connections and ventures - respectable, creditable, without any of the Kim family's gangster past, and quietly and without fanfare remove themselves from the late Gapryong's inner circle.

They distance themselves, and though you ignore their request to do the same - Big Deal's boss, Sinu Han finds Jake Kim and so does Samuel Seo and the distance naturally grows.

Jake stays in the periphery of your life.

The occasional text, and rarer run-ins.

But he always keeps an ear out for you. Looks for you in every reflection. Hopes for you round every corner.

Right person at the right place but at the wrong time.

He does purposely seek you out once.

When he is on the cusp of joining Big Deal and needs someone sane to talk to.

To decipher his thoughts and feelings with the one person who knows him best.

It's you, it's always been you but-

After, he fully realised how different you both are. The trajectories you are on. You, untainted by all this gang shit, and him about to dive head first into it.

He can't marr you with this.

Wrong place, wrong time.

You sought him out once too, in the form of a letter as he serves his time in juvie.

Jake marvels at your handwriting, chicken scratch somehow turned graceful and elegant with time.

Yet-

Awkward silences punctuate the end of each sentence, and disappointment is found between the lines. Your tone is almost pleading, and there's a desperate yearning for yesteryear.

Jake chooses instead to focus on the crumbs of your life you offer. Thinks at least you're happy and safe and ignorant to the sort of life he leads now.

He keeps your letter under his pillow. Reads it over and over until he can recite it off by heart. Drafts a different reply in his mind every night though he can never bring himself to respond.

"Jake?"

The next time you see him again, he barely recognises you. Whether that was due to seasons apart or his focus on other priorities, he isn't sure.

He turns his head when you call his name, Johan Seong following suit.

"You look different," you comment and he does. Jake finally fills out his tall frame, lean muscle showing through his suit and a scar now adorns his lips.

He tilts his head, trying to place you until you frown. A familiar look of impatience, rolling your eyes-

"Y/N?" Your name feeling rusty on his tongue and his eyes widen at your appearance. How well the years have treated you, how kind puberty has been and how amazingly you clean up.

"Too important now to remember me?" You say, folding your arms but smiling.

"Me? I'm a nobody," Jake grins, relaxing in your presence as Johan mutters his agreement somewhere in the background. "What are you doing around here?"

In the end, he rejects your entrance to Club Vivi.

"Aw Jake, cmon for old time's sake!"

"You're underaged!" He says, but what he wants to tell you is this place is bad news. The further you stay away from anything to do with the Four Crews, from himself, the better.

"Shit!"

You manage to refrain from stomping your feet like a bratty child, distracted by the way that Jake smiles at you. Even with the pulsating music spilling out onto the street, the heaving queues of people, it feels just like it used to.

A wave of nostalgia hits you.

You reach out, yanking him down by his tie until he is eye level with you.

"Whatever." You thought you might be more upset with the rejection but you can't bring yourself to care right now. Not when Jake Kim is right there. "Text me, ok? I don't hear from you anymore. I miss you."

Jake's throat is suddenly dry.

How many years has it been since he's been eye to eye with you. He remembers his mother's fondness of you, your tinkling laugh in his ear. You by his side, the kisses on his cheek and soothing strokes on his back.

"I miss you t-"

Then Johan Seong clears his throat, uncomfortable at being caught up in this scene and wanting to be literally anywhere else, and Jake's eyes dart towards him.

God Dog.

One of the four gangs.

A mess of underhanded dealings involving Gun Park and Goo Kim. God Dog and Big Deal and Hostel and Workers.

The current situation draws sharply into focus, and Jake is reminded of his main goal - Sinu Han.

The spell is broken and Jake's mask as Big Deal Boss slams firmly back on.

"Sure thing," Jake straightens up again and you have no choice but to release your grip.

He doesn't plan to. Doesn't want to drag you into his mess. Swallows down any regret and feelings and offers you a wink instead.

Still the wrong place, wrong time.

Despite Jake's best intentions you are reunited.

You join Big Deal.

...Or more accurately, you find employment on Big Deal Street.

"Y/N?" Jake calls out to you and today your role is reversed.

It takes you a while to recognise your Jake dressed in his suit, a new scar across his nose and flanked by intimidating looking men. Body language serious, powerful and domineering.

Goddamn.

"...Jake?!"

"Everything ok, Boss?" Someone asks and your eyebrows quirk at 'Boss'.

"Fine, Jerry," Jake dismisses any concerns from the hulking man to his right and turns his smile on for you once more, "Just nice to see an old friend."

He lips says friend but his heart wonders if he has the privilege of calling you that anymore.

Are you barely even acquaintances? Someone you might bump into and give a polite nod to. Was he that teenager that you used to hang with once upon a time who you occasionally reminisce about? Do you ever think about him and wonder how he is doing? Do you think about the moments that you had together and the lives you could have had?

Turns out it doesn't matter anyway.

Jake catches the softness in your eyes and he sees that friend is enough.

It could be enough.

Now working part time at the restaurant Jake likes to frequent, you bump into each other time and time again. You become a regular fixture in his life once more.

Serving him extra large portions with a grin, offering up pickle juice with every stew.

"You still add this to all your jjigae, right?" You pull a face, it was never to your taste even if Jake acts like it's the most delicious thing in the world.

Jake blinks in surprise. "You remembered?"

You wipe your hands on your apron, then rest them on your hip. "Duh."

The other faces you gradually put a name to.

Jerry, Brad, Jason, Lineman, and later Lua.

You join them occasionally for the odd drink, perched at the end of the bench next to Jake and soaking up the warm atmosphere, or more likely the boys getting a telling off from Lua even as she throws you a small sly grin every so often.

Sinu and Yeonhui join the group now and then.

The latter takes a liking to you and the former gives you unsubtle glances, elbowing Jake and murmuring things in his ears that causes him to blush and bat Sinu away.

He's talking about you, that much is obvious but you wonder what it is exactly that turns Jake that cute shade of pink.

"What are you saying about me?" You whisper into Jake's ear one time and he jerks sharply at your proximity. Banging his knee against the table so hard that it topples some drinks.

"Shit!"

"Jake!" Yeonhui tuts, "Be careful."

Sinu, arm around her, just grins like a maniac.

You: Sooooo...

You: What is Sinu always whispering about?

Jake: Don't worry about it 😘

You: 😒

Jake: Sorry we didn't get to talk much today.

Jake: Hope you're ok

You: Don't worry about me!

You: I know you're super busy

You: It's just nice being around you again

Jake: Same 🙂

Jake: Are you going to get fired for giving me that free lunch?

You: You look like you needed it

Jake: I'm fine 💪

You: Nuh uh. You're tired. And stressed. I can tell

Jake: ...

Jake: Thanks for looking after me

Jake: I've missed you

You: I've missed you too

You: I've still got your jacket!

Jake: No worries I'll get it tomorrow

You: Thanks for letting me borrow it

You: and walking me home

Jake: M'lady

You: 😒

Jake: Good morning 😁

You: Too early 😪

Jake: It is. But i'm looking forward to seeing you later

You: Still can't believe you sprayed jjigae out your nose

Jake: You caught me off guard!

You: It was just an innocent comment

You: Who knew where your filthy mind went

Jake: 😒

Jake: You made Brad blush!

Jake: brad!!

You: 🤭

You: Can you ask Jerry to stop calling me ma'am?

Jake: Will do

Jake: Sorry ma'am

You: 🙄

You: Do you always train like that?

Jake: Yeah why?

You: Oh 🫣

You: Why does everyone in your crew keep bowing to me

Jake: Who knows why they do what they do

You: And EVERYONE keeps calling me Ma'am!

Jake: 🤷🏻‍♂️

You: Shirtless was unnecessary

Jake: 😉

You: 🙄

Jake: you try running laps around the street

You: can't put those abs away can you

Jake: not when they get so many admirers

You: 🙄

Jake: I had the weirdest dream about you last night

You. Go oooon

Jake: 🤐

You: Stop distracting me! You're going to get me fired

Jake: Who's gonna fire you?

You: Jake!

Jake: I'll speak to the owner don't worry about it

You: Jake NO

Jake: Now who's distracting who

You: Well who's gonna fire the boss?

Jake: 😒

You: Besides I didn't even do anything

Jake: That uniform cannot be regulation 🥵

You: 🤫

You: Thanks for taking me to see Auntie!

Jake: Moms so happy to see you

Jake: Found someone else to slander me with

You: It's all from a place of love

Jake: Sure 🙄

Jake: You working tonight?

You: Yeah and you better keep me company 😚

Jake: Always

During your closing shifts, when Jake is around, your boss and owner, is frequently nowhere to be seen.

You wonder if Sinu is responsible for this but you can never bring yourself to mind when Jake stays behind, offering to help.

Removing his jacket and rolling up his sleeves as he wipes down surfaces with you, loads the dishwasher, clean the floors.

"Isn't this beneath the Big Deal leader?" You ask tonight, mopping as he clears and re-organizes the counter.

Jake shrugs, "I don't mind."

(Truth be told, Jason and Brad had given him a questionable look through the shop window once, when they were patrolling the streets at night and found their beloved boss performing menial duties.

Then they saw you grinning next to him and the way Jake looked at you.

And they got it. They, and no other Big Deal member, had questioned it since.)

You resume focus to your task at hand, wringing out the filthy water and scrubbing with earnest.

Damn, this patch of floor is dirty.

Despite pouring all your strength into this section, the mysterious grey splodge, which has likely accumulated from years of slipshod mopping, still has not shifted.

Noticing the sheen of sweat along your brow, Jake plucks a napkin from the holder and offers it to you. "Here."

"I'm fine."

"Your sweaty face says otherwise."

"Nah, I'm good."

You narrow your eyes at the stain, so absorbed in your task you don't notice his approach.

Contemplate getting on your hands and knees to examine it when Jake's hand edges forward, gripping your chin gently, and disrupts your train of thought.

"Come here." He huffs with amusement, angling your face to his.

Your eyes widen comically large and he chuckles. He brings the napkin up to your brow, dabbing attentively. Your temples and down the side of your face, the tip of your nose, before cupping your cheek.

"There."

There indeed.

You lean into his palm and sigh. A sigh built up from the depth of your being, that started from years ago, and your eyes flutter close when you feel Jake's thumb run along your bottom lip.

It's more intimate than you have ever been before but doesn't feel anywhere close to enough.

"Y/N-" he murmurs. Your name feels rusty no more.

Jake leans closer. LIke a moth to a flame, and your flame burns undying and gold.

Knuckles rap on the window, shattering the moment. You both turn and see Jerry with a solemn look on his face.

"One moment," Jake says, eyes apologetic and he exits.

The moment stretches as you watch Jake talking to Jerry outside. Both their expressions growing more fierce, exchanged more heated, by the second.

Jake sighs, and his sigh is nothing like yours only minutes ago. His eyes catch yours. He thinks he might regret this forever, wondering about the lingering what-if, but he thinks about your safety and the safety of Big Deal, and he leaves. Striding off into the night.

Jerry comes in, contrite and bows. Tells you sorry but Jake has somewhere else to be.

Leaves you even more bewildered and confused, wondering what has happened.

Workers storm the street only a few days later.

The Hunt for Big Deal peaks when Eugene, not able to get his way, calls in his favour.

Holding back the police, intrusive thoughts of his failure as a leader enter Jake's mind. The state of the street, the crew. Members of Big Deal lie bruised and bloodied around him.

The one silver lining, at least, is that you're nowhere near.

You're not tangled up in this.

Maybe it could have been the right place.

But the time cannot be more wrong.

You and Jake had left your friendship hanging at an odd place that night.

Then he never called, never texted.

(Neither did your boss, but you didn't care about that.)

You glumly scroll through your text chain with him. All the flirtatious words that you had assumed were building up to something.

You sent him one message asking if he was ok, an olive branch and permission to forget everything if it made him uncomfortable and he didn't respond.

The silence said everything you needed to hear.

You are left to wallow and mope in your gloom.

Jake is awake. Broken and bruised but alive.

Left to deal with the aftermath, the pieces of his crew, with the ever loyal Lineman by his side.

Forces himself to push on when all he wants is to curl up in a ball somewhere. Put on a brave face because what else can he do? Recollect his thoughts, rethink his strategy.

Lineman and Lightning Choi are very little comfort to Jake during these hours. Even as both their loud personalities fill in the silence, camaraderie building between them by the day, Jake feels fragile. Stretched thin and strained.

Regardless, he plasters on his plastic smile. The one he used to wear when he was looking for Sinu and trying to hold on to his sanity.

Funny how life comes full circle.

In his heart and head, he knows that all his focus should be on getting stronger, on saving his crew.

But your latest text, left on read and left hanging, haunts him.

The Wanted posters capture your attention and snap you out of your mood.

'What the...?''

Pictures of your friends pinned up in the convenience store. Bounties in stark black font show beneath their faces.

You abandon your goods, your treats and pick-me-ups mid purchase and make your way to Big Deal Street as quickly as you can.

Navigating public transport and running until you're panting and out of breath and sweat blurs your vision.

Everywhere is shuttered and closed.

Everything Jake does, tastes, drinks is tinged with bitterness.

Nevertheless, a routine forms and with each passing day he feels more like himself.

Determination returns.

He trains alongside Lineman even though Lightning Choi insists that he can't teach Jake anything.

Feels his strength returning and muscle growing. Busies himself with preparation in all forms.

“Here,” Jake sets down fresh cooked ramyeon in front of Lineman who looks up at him in surprise. “Eat up. You need it with all your training,”

Lineman wells up with gratitude, “Boss!”

It's a simple meal.

Packaged noodles Lineman has had thousands of times before but it's the best thing he has ever tasted.

In return, Lineman does something for Jake.

He's not sure it's the right thing to do at first, but anyone with eyes can see Jake moping around like a lovesick puppy.

He extends the reaches of his network.

Calls in long owed favours, reconnects to people in his old Monster Crew, people he trusts that won't spill his whereabouts. Asks everyone to keep an eye out, keep their ear to the ground.

Gold is struck when Lineman manages to locate Jerry.

Encouraged by agreement from Lua, who has stayed in contact with the No.2, that this is what the boss needs-

Lineman sets forth his plan.

“Boss?” Lineman knocks on Jake's bedroom door, a makeshift backroom full of cobwebs with a rickety sleeping cot.

Where Jake currently lies, face illuminated by his phone.

Lineman refrains from rolling his eyes. Probably going through his texts again.

The guy thought he was being subtle, but it's obvious as hell whenever he's looking at past messages with you. It's the only time a genuine smile graces his face before it inevitably turns forlorn.

“Hmm?” Jake clicks the screen off and sits up as Lineman pokes his head around.

“You got a sec?”

“Sure thing.”

“Ok.” Linemans head disappears again.

There's some minor commotion behind the door. Hushed voices squabbling and-

The door cracks open again and you step through.

When you got the call from Lineman, you leapt at the chance of seeing Jake again. To see that he's ok with your own eyes.

Give him a piece of your mind for icing you out, probably under some misguided sense of chivalry.

For not explaining a single thing to you and keeping you in the dark even as this huge shit storm rained down on him.

Worse of all, the audacity for leaving you on read.

Unfortunately, at seeing Jake-

The bruises, now mottled green and yellow, the cuts and scratches littering his skin, body bandaged and tender, the way his eyes have lost their light.

-Everything you planned to say and wanted to say goes out the window.

And you burst into tears.

Lineman, taking that as his cue, clicks the door shut.

Jake is stuck somewhere between elated and miserable.

You're here? You're really here?

But fuck. You're here.

Caught in this chaos.

When he thought he had managed to at least protect you if no one else, you show up when he's at his most powerless.

Then your lip quivers, and your nose lets out a telltale sniffle and-

Shit.

None of that matters.

Jake tries for a smile of his own but feels his own lips turning down.

“What you crying for, dummy?” Tone aiming for jovial, his own voice betrays him and cracks at the last syllable.

A small voice in your head is outraged. Who exactly is he calling a dummy, has he even seen the state of himself.

But you don't move, stay standing by the door, staring as the tears come thick and fast.

Until-

Jake opens his arm, an invitation, and you throw yourself at him.

He winces feeling your weight collide into his body and disturbing his injuries. Luckily your arms coming to hug him around the neck quickly dulls the pain.

He embraces you, one arm holding you close and other hand stroking your hair while telling you it's fine, he's fine, everything's ok.

God. He didn't even realise how much he missed you until you're here. Even the scent of your hair, the feel of your clothes.

Nevermind being able to touch you and hold you.

“Don't you dare ditch me again,” you growl into his shoulder.

Jake opens his mouth, about to argue-

Then you squeeze him tight, lips brushing along his skin and all fight leaves him.

“Ok.”

The initial reunion is sweet. Glued at the hip once more, one never seen without the other.

You forgive Jake with little drama and he is extra attentive. If he's not next to you then he seeks out your eyes in every moment, every scenario.

Quietly checking you're ok, you're happy. That this situation isn't more than you can handle.

When your eyes meet his, your face lights up and you give him a smile that melts his heart and all his defences.

“I will go with you anywhere,” you tell him one night, sitting on some dusty stairs.

“I know,” he grins.

Realistically, it's a problem. The other problem is that he always wants you with him too.

However.

The patience from others is short lived.

Lineman is pleased to have his leader back. See the bounce in Jake's step, the grin on his lips that reaches his eyes.

And who is Lightning Choi to get in the way of young love?

Watching you two laughing together, talking in hushed tones, sharing inside jokes warms his heart

Except.

You and Jake are a thorn in his side.

The incessant giggling is annoying. The constant whispering is distracting.

“Get a room!” He shouts over one day, at the end of his rope when Lineman mishears an instruction and ends up face planting.

That did the trick. Both of you avert your gaze and blush furiously.

Hmph. Young idiots in love.

“You're leaving for Gangnam tomorrow?” You ask, lying beside Jake and resting your head on his shoulder.

“The First Affiliates,” he confirms, clipped and tense.

With D-Day drawing closer, Jake has grown more on edge. Doubt creeping in if he's strong enough to infiltrate and reach Jinyoung Park. Even with the temporary alliance with Daniel Park, he's not sure if it's enough.

After all, the last team up with Charles Choi should have proved sufficient.

With 1A, Jake has given you information on a need to know basis. Kept the details light lest the worry extends to you. Despite his best efforts, you're concerned.

Although, for other selfish reasons.

You prop yourself up on your elbow and face him.

“You said you're not going to ditch me again.”

“Huh?”

“You said!” You jab at his chest with your free hand. “You said you wouldn't ditch me again. No matter what happens.”

Jake pulls a face, and it's one you recognise as regretting his words. Weighing up if being together is worth the potential danger you're put in and trying to worm his way out.

You cut off his spiralling thoughts with another jab and scowl at him. “Promise, asshole.”

His eyebrows shoot up in affront, “Who you calling asshole?”

With one swift movement, he flips you over. You lie flat on his back as he smirks down at you.

“Don't distract me, asshole.”

“It's not my fault you're getting distracted,” and the cocky little shit has the audacity to wink at you.

Ugh. You're serious and he's treating this like a joke. This position is also causing your thoughts to run away with itself.

“Jake,” your gaze dips down to his lips and you angle your face up to his.

He peers down, half-lidded and playful.

“Yes?” He inches closer.

“Stop it.”

"Stop what?” And closer.

“Promise me,” you murmur, lips gently brushing against his. Tips of your noses grazing, his hair falling out of place and breath, minty and sweet on your skin.

“I promise.”

Jake pulls back, enough to look into your eyes. Searches and searches, warm brown eyes boring into yours for what feels like an eternity.

Then finally-

Finds what he's looking for.

And he kisses you, hard. Pours everything, his heart, his hopes, fears and doubts, into the one kiss.

Jake finds Jinyoung but loses Samuel.

Finds out more than he expected about Samuel’s background. Pieces together his background with their falling out, his complexes. At least Jake is able to understand him a little more.

Jerry is safe, if not further wounded from his fight with the Fifth Affiliates - no, with Hostel.

But he's safe. So are Brad and Jason and Lua.

Overall, he considers it a success even if it's middling at best.

Jake has promised you.

Yet-

He wonders if some promises are better to break.

He thinks it would break you too. A little. In a way that you can recover from, he lies to himself.

He opens his mouth, wanting to ask Lua a favour, a huge goddamn favour. Maybe she can be the one that tells you.

Jake would be indebted to her forever. Probably get eaten alive by the guilt, but surely it's the kind thing to do.

Lua glares at him before he even gets a word out. It's the most angry she has ever looked.

Jerry is the one who responds. “Don't you dare, Jake.”

The thing is, there might never be the right place and right time. At least not in Jake's foreseeable future when there's danger lurking around every corner.

He had initially assumed you and him weren't meant to be, life destined to run on different paths. Had given up at first, when you were both just kids, then given a sliver of hope when you met again.

Except isn't that worse than having no hope at all. To get a taste, a glimpse of what he could have?

He has tried to be so good, so selfless.

A good son and a good friend and a good leader. Tried to give everything his all and come up short and weak.

But for you, it never really mattered. You didn't want him to be anything but himself. Didn't care that he was Gapryong Kim's son or Big Deal No. 1.

With you - it's painfully uncomplicated. Even as all other areas of his life crumble.

You're still the right person. Even if nothing else had been right or felt right, you did.

You do.

And in the end, isn't that all that really matters?

Jake lets his selfishness take over.

Watches you from the doorway, pacing back and forth and is surprised you haven't worn a path into the floorboards.

Reasons with himself that he deserves this, deserves you. Thinks that he would go insane if he doesn't allow himself this.

This one thing, the most precious thing.

Something he held back and repressed for years. Putting everything but himself and his happiness first.

He's weak. He's simple. He wants to, needs to give in and he wants to be happy.

“I'm back,” he calls over, and your face snap to his in shock.

You ignore his new scars and fresh bandages. It doesn't matter because he's here. He's come back to you.

Jake opens his arms, an invitation, and you take one step, two, three-

And throw yourself at him. Clinging on. Feeling his skin, his body against yours.

“I was worried.” You say, voice muffled into his t-shirt.

“I can tell,” Jake is grinning. Whenever he thinks he may never smile again, you always tease it out of him.

“Don't make fun of me,” you say, lifting your head and frowning up at him

“Sorry.” And he is. For a lot.

Jake gently grips your chin once more, angling your face towards his.

He wonders how he managed to resist for so long, impressed at his own control because how could he ever say no when you look at him like this.

(He knows he looks at you like this too. Seen pitying glances from Lua and heard sniggers from Sinu.)

Jake surges forward.

Captures your lips with his, feels your body turning stiff with surprise and then-

Feels you sag with relief, with happiness, with pleasure. Melting and leaning forward, seeking out more.

His free arm winds around your waist and pulls you close. Pressing the lengths of your body together and promising never to let go again.

During Jake's worst days, he didn't think he would have the privilege of growing old.

No family of his own. And though you were just friends, instead of a faceless partner, he would still imagine it was you by his side and the kids were the perfect mix of you and him.

Dark thoughts would turn to lamenting letting you slip through his fingers. Thinking about what could have been.

On his best days, he dreamt of growing old with you.

In time, Jake will come to know that fate will be kinder to him, his dreams will become a reality.

From the start you've always been the right person, at the right time, at the right place.

#god i love jakey #lookism #lookism x reader #jake kim x reader #jake kim #kim gimyeong x reader #kim gimyung x reader #lookism fics #wannaeatramyeon

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literaryvein-reblogs · 3 months ago

Text

Some Worldbuilding Vocabulary

Abeyance: When the audience temporarily suspends their questions about made-up words or worldbuilding details with the implicit understanding that they will be answered later in the story.

Absorption: The two-way street wherein the audience is immersed in the created world and is picking up the author’s metaphoric building blocks to recreate the concept in their head.

Acculturation: When an adult assimilates into another culture.

Additive: When something has been added to a secondary world, usually in the form of magic or fantasy species.

Affinity: A kinship pattern wherein the familial bond is based upon marriage.

Aggregate Inconsistencies: When audiences pick up internal inconsistencies not within the same story but from multiple sources within the shared universe.

Anachronism: Details that do not conform to their time period or culture.

Analogue Culture: Real-life cultures that the creator emulates in their work and then applies their fantasy conceits to.

Ancestor Worship: The belief that deceased ancestors still exist, are still a part of the family, and can intervene within the living world on their descendants’ behalf.

Animism: The belief that all objects, creatures, and places are imbued with a spiritual essence.

Apex Predator: The predator at the top of a food web that no other creature naturally feeds upon. Two apex predators cannot exist in the same niche.

Apologetics: In worldbuilding, the attempt to explain inconsistencies in terms of existing canon.

Appropriated Culture: Using a culture as a whole that the creator is not a member of. Different from an analogue culture in that the analogue is changed by the creator and used respectfully.

Artifacts: In worldbuilding, the observable ways a culture behaves due to their cultural worldview. This can include politics, economics, religion, education, arts, humanities, and linguistics, along with many other cultural norms.

Ascendant: In worldbuilding, a world that the magic is increasing in power and influence.

Assimilation: When an individual rejects their original culture and adopts the cultural norms and beliefs of the dominant culture.

Author Authority: When an author demonstrates expert-level knowledge in a field to their audience.

Author Worldview: What Mark J. P. Wolf calls “not only the ideas and ideologies of the world’s inhabitants, but also those which the author is expressing through the world’s structure of events.”

Autocracy: A government in which supreme power concentrates in the hands of one individual or polity.

Avatar: The embodiment of a deity in another form, usually humanoid.

B-C

Bible: In the field of television writing, a series guidebook that usually includes the pitch, character descriptions, a synopsis, as well as worldbuilding details.

Biome: The vegetation and animals that exists within a region. Terrestrial biomes include: forest (tropical, temperate, or boreal), grassland, desert, and tundra.

Black Box: In information processing, when a system is viewed in terms of its inputs and outputs without any understanding as to its internal workings.

Bottom-Up: In design, where the granular, base elements of the system are created first, then grouping them together into larger constructs over and over until a pattern forms. Also known as “pantsing” in writing and worldbuilding because the creator is building by the seat of their pants.

Callback: From standup comedy where the punchline in a joke used earlier in the set is alluded to again, eliciting another laugh from the reframing of what was already familiar.

Canon: The core doctrine for the world when conflicting information arises. Usually what the original creator made takes canonical precedence over subsequent additions.

Capitalism: The economic system wherein individuals own the means of production.

Chekhov's Gun: Often understood to mean that something must be introduced previously if it will have significance later in a narrative, but meant by the playwright that nothing should be included in the story that is not completely necessary.

Climate: The temperature and rainfall in regions over approximately 30 years. Classified as tropical (high temperature and high precipitation), dry (high temperature and low precipitation), temperate (mid temperature and mid precipitation), continental (in the center of large continents with warm summers and cold winters), and polar (low temperatures and low precipitation).

Commercial Fiction: The style of fiction that includes all genre fiction, the aim of which is entertainment. Often fast-paced and plot-driven.

Compelling: One of the four Cs of worldbuilding, which deals with how well the core concept and subsequent details maintain audience interest.

Complete: One of the four Cs of worldbuilding, which deals with the sense that the world is lived in, has a sense of history, and continues on even when the story ends.

Complexity Creep: When material gradually grows in complexity over its lifetime, raising the bar of entry for new people experiencing the material for the first time.

Conceits: Where a story deviates from reality. Usually the focus of the fiction by being what the author intends on exploring in their works.

Conlanguage: A constructed language created specifically for a story world.

Consanguinity: A kinship pattern wherein the familial bond is based upon a shared genetic lineage.

Consistent: One of the four Cs of worldbuilding, which deals with how well the material maintains its own internal logic as established by the fantasy conceits.

Constructed World: A fictional world that does not exist but was created by someone.

Continuity: A gestalt term for perception where the mind fills in obvious blanks to make a unified whole.

Convergent Evolution: When two or more species develop analogous features to deal with their environment.

Co-Residency: A kinship pattern wherein the familial bond is based upon shared space.

Cosmology: The study of mapping the universe and our place in it.

Cost: In worldbuilding, when a character must risk or sacrifice something for magic to take effect.

Creative: One of the four Cs of worldbuilding, which deals with how and to what extent the constructed world deviates from the real world.

Credibility Threshold: Where worldbuilding details must only appear plausible to a general audience rather than demonstrating expert-level knowledge.

Cultural Identity: An individual’s self-concept as distinct from others based upon nationality, ethnicity, social class, generation, and locality.

Cultural Universals: Traits, patterns, and institutions prevalent throughout humankind.

Customs: Informal rules of behavior that people take part in without thinking about it.

D-F

Deity: The most powerful of metaphysical entities, deities often exist in pantheons, have thematic powers based upon their roles, and few weaknesses or limitations.

Descendent: In terms of magic, the idea that the most powerful magics are from ages past and that magic is on the decline in terms of power and influence.

Despotism: An economic system wherein an individual or institution controls the laws and resources of an area.

Deus Ex Machina: A plot device in which an unexpected power, event, or deity intervenes to save a hopeless situation.

Differentiation: When one culture forms part of their identity by contrasting themselves with another nearby culture.

Divergent: When the creator alters something in the development of the world but it remains very similar to the real world in every detail but this fantasy conceit. For instance, a world that resembles our own but made up of anthropomorphic animals instead of humans.

Divine: The belief that something is of, from, or like a god.

Democracy: A government in which the people elect a governing body in some fashion.

Early Adoption: When an inventor or culture creates a technology long before their analogue culture did in the real world.

Easter Egg: A hidden message, image, or feature that is meant to be hunted for within the material.

Economics: The study of production, distribution, and consumption of goods and services.

Education: A form of socialization in which we teach the youth what they need to know to become functioning members of society.

Effective Worldbuilding: When (a) the immersive state is never disrupted for the audience, or when (b) the immersive state is disrupted with a positive result.

Element X: N. K. Jemisin’s concept of when fantasy elements diverge from the real world. Similar to fantasy conceits.

Emic: An account of a cultural idea, concept, behavior, or belief documented as if from within the culture.

Empires: Multinational states with political hegemony over other ethnicities, cultures, or nations.

Encyclopedic Impulse: The consumer’s desire to know everything about the world or the author’s desire to expound upon all the worldbuilding details.

Ephemera: Transitionary materials that are not meant to exist for long term, such as advertisements, diary entries, letters, posters, and the like.

Ethnicity: A group that identifies with each other based on presumed similarities such as a shared language, ancestry, history, society, or social treatment within an area. Ethnicities are not dependent upon, but are often associated with, certain taxonomic traits or physiological similarities within those groups.

Etic: When cultural ideas, concepts, behaviors, or beliefs are documented from outside the cultural milieu as a passive observer with an eye for similarities between all cultures

Exsecting: When the creator removes something that exists in the real world from the created world.

Extrapolation: In worldbuilding, the belief that any fantasy conceit should be followed to its natural conclusion.

Face Validity: When worldbuilding detail appears believable upon immediate examination. See Credibility Threshold.

Fan Service: Material included in a story that serves no narrative purpose other than to please fans.

Fantasy Conceit: What the creator intends to explore in the world, it is where the constructed world deviates from the real world, usually in the form of geography, biology, physics, metaphysics, technology, or culture.

Fantasy Function: When analogue cultures are filtered through fantasy conceits to populate the created world with its output details.

Fetishes: Items imbued with cultural significance and power.

First Principles: Core belief and value systems within a culture that are often unconscious until confronted.

Flavor Text: Texts within stories, video games, role-playing games, and action figures that add depth by providing a sense of history but do not alter the game mechanics or story in a substantial way.

Feudalism: An economic system wherein there is a division between the lords that protect the vassals that work the land in exchange for protection.

Four Cs of Worldbuilding: See Creative, Complete, Consistent, and Compelling.

G-L

Gender: A social construct of how cultures differentiate the sexes.

Generalist: When every individual in a society has the same basic job, which is providing their daily caloric intake. A staple of hunter and gatherers and in contrast to specialists.

Generation: A social cohort group based around the period in which children grow up, become adults, and bear children of their own. Because of this shared timeframe and significant events in their lives, generations often share a similar worldview within the general culture.

Genre Expectation: The qualities audiences expect of their genres to be considered successful, i.e. is the thriller thrilling or the romance romantic. For fantasy and science fiction, the genre expectation is worldbuilding.

Goldilocks Zone: The habitable zone around a star where the temperature is right for water to exist in liquid form.

Group: Two or more individuals who share a collective sense of unity via interacting with each other because of shared similar characteristics.

Habitat: The ecosystem or ecological community creatures exist in.

Handwave: A writing term for explaining crucial events dismissively with minimal details.

Handwavium: As opposed to the handwave, when everything else in the imagined world fits logically together with the exception of the fantasy conceit, which the audience must then accept to continue on with the story.

Hard Deduction: When there is no narrator and no character bringing the worldbuilding details to the audience’s attention, who must then piece together the world rules based upon the provided details alone.

Hard Impart: When information is imparted to the audience through narrative text, usually through the narrator or the internal thoughts of characters.

Hero Props: Items that are necessary for a scene to take place, making them integral to the story.

Heroic Theory of Invention: When inventors and discoverers of scientific developments are treated as solitary geniuses rather than products of good luck or a part of a team.

High-Concept: A term from the film industry meaning an idea needs lots of background details, usually compiled from the worldbuilding, to be explained for the core concept to be compelling.

Hybrid: (a) In biology, a living thing bred together from two different species, which is not able to produce its own viable offspring. (b) A method the author can employ to get details across to the audience in which it appears they are using a hard or soft impart, but the audience deduces are not correct, which then casts provided information into doubt and adds new nuance.

Iceberg Theory: The theory proffered by Hemingway that so long as the author is aware of the underlying ideas, they can cut away anything from the story and it will still make sense. Usually interpreted to mean one only needs to reveal 10% of worldbuilding details or backstory.

Illusion of Completeness: The sense that the world is complete and that all questions can be answered within it rather than the creator explicitly spelling out all the details.

Immersion: The altered state in which the audience feels they are physically present in a non-physical world.

Ineffective Worldbuilding: When worldbuilding details become obvious to the consumer, thus breaking the sense of immersion and reminding them of the real world. This can be caused by internal inconsistencies or from reality incursions.

Info Dump: A sudden overwhelming quantity of backstory or background information supplied in a short timeframe.

Info Dump Equity: The idea that an author should not reveal worldbuilding information until the audience craves it, thus being able to deliver an info dump without anyone complaining.

In-Group: The other people an individual identifies with. While they may not share the exact worldview, they share the same first principles in understanding the world around them.

Innovation: The drive for change, usually technological, but also socially.

Inside-Out: How audiences process worldbuilding details, in that they pertain to the immediate understanding of the scene, which are then pieced together into an understanding of the world.

Inspired Worldbuilding: The top form of worldbuilding, which invites additional audience interaction via their imagination after the story has concluded.

Institutions: Stable organizations of individuals formed for a shared purpose, usually by performing specific, reoccurring patterns of behavior.

Integration: When an individual adopts the cultural norms and beliefs of the dominant culture while still retaining their original culture.

Interconnection: When the threads of worldbuilding are tied together cohesively. Part of Sanderson’s third law of magic systems.

Interquel: Stories set in an existing world but that do not connect with the original story.

Intraquel: Stories set in an existing world that fill in gaps in the existing story.

Kinship: How social relationships organize into groups, roles, and families. Usually consisting of consanguinity, affinity, or co-residency.

Limitations: Checks put upon magical powers, usually in the form of weaknesses and costs. Sanderson maintains in his second law that limitations are more dramatically important than powers.

Linguistics: The study of languages.

Literary Fiction: The style of fiction that aims for awards, considers itself art, focuses on the prose, and is usually slowly paced.

Locality: The small-scale community in which the individuals in a group grew up, usually comprising of a town, neighborhood, or block, which differentiates them from others in the surrounding area.

M-O

Macroworldbuilding: The first of the stages N. K. Jemisin breaks her worldbuilding process into, which consists of planet, continents, climate, and ecology.

Magic: Change wrought through unnatural means.

Magic Point Systems: Magic systems where the casters have a set amount of energy, usually referred to as mana, to spend on their effects.

Magical Thinking: The belief people can affect change the world around them through thoughts and behaviors.

Mana: A frequent generalized term for the finite resource magic users spend on their magical effects.

Marginalization: When an individual rejects both their original culture and the dominant culture.

Mary Sue/ Marty Sue: Originally a created character for fanfic who has no flaws and is inserted into interactions with the canonical characters. Now an insult leveled at characters consumers don’t like, usually claiming they are overly capable and without flaws.

Masquerade: A term taking from the World of Darkness RPG wherein the existence of magic is hidden from the general populous.

Metaphysics: In worldbuilding, dealing with deities, spirits, cosmology, and the afterlife. In essence, creatures and locations that do not abide by understandings of biology or physics.

Microworldbuilding: The second of the stages N. K. Jemisin breaks her worldbuilding process into, which consists of species, morphology, raciation, acculturation, power, and role.

Monotheism: The belief in a single deity only.

Mystery Box: The theory proffered by JJ Abrams that mystery drives audience interest, which will keep them invested in a story so long as they are promised elucidation later.

Mythopeia: Constructed mythologies, lores, and histories within created worlds.

Nationality: How an individual relates to their state. A component of cultural identity.

Nominal Change: A superficial change in the secondary world that contributes nothing to the worldbuilding.

Norms: What is considered acceptable group behavior and what people should and should not do in their social surroundings.

Oligarchy: A government in which power rests in a small group of people like the nobility, wealthy, or religious leaders.

One-Off: An intentional inconsistency meant to highlight the aberration as separate from the established worldbuilding.

Out-Group: Those that do not share the same collective worldview, which are often mistrusted or viewed with outright hostility.

Overlaid Worlds: Constructed worlds with real-world locations but with the addition of fantasy elements.

P-R

Pantheon: A categorization of collected deities based upon the culture that worships them

Pantsers: Creators who build or write without a clear outcome in mind. See Bottom-Up.

Pidgin Language: A grammatically simplified language used for trade that comprises vocabularies drawn from numerous languages.

Planet of Hats: The trope of treating a species or world as monolithic and with one defining trait.

Planners: Worldbuilders or writers who have a clear plan once they start creating. See Top-Down.

Politics: The decision-making process within groups and individuals involving power structures.

Polytheism: The belief of multiple gods, usually inhabiting a pantheon.

Porcelain Argument: In worldbuilding, the belief that technology stagnates at the level at which magic or a fantasy conceit is introduced.

Portal Fantasy: A subgenre in which the characters from the real world travel to a secondary world.

Prequel: Stories set in an existing world that precede the original story. They do not need to connect to the original story but often do.

Primary Sexual Characteristics: The sex organs used in reproduction.

Primary World: The real world in which we all reside and draw our experience from.

Prime Mover: A conceit that cannot be removed without the story world falling apart.

Profane: Something that is religiously blasphemous or obscene.

Prologue: An opening sequence in a narrative that establishes background details to create context, clarification, and miscellaneous information for the audience

Promise of the Premise: The term coined by Blake Snyder for the point in the story when the setup is complete and it examines its core conceits. An author breaks the promise of the premise when the story is not about the promised core concepts.

Pull Factors: Factors that draw immigrants to an area.

Purple Prose: Descriptions that becomes overly ornate and extravagant, to the point they break the sense of immersion by drawing attention to themselves.

Push Factors: Factors that drive immigrants out of an area.

Race: (a) In biology, a grouping of populations below the level of subspecies, and is rather imprecise in distinguishing the differences between them. (b) In the fantasy genre, usually understood to mean “species.”

Racial Attributes: The assumption that any one fantasy race shares not only certain abilities like flight or the capacity to speak with animals, but certain demeanors, temperaments, and biases.

Reality Incursions: When the outside world interjects itself into the created fantasy experience to remind the consumer that this is indeed a made-up world. They usually occur when the consumer has expert knowledge in a field that is not depicted correctly in the narrative.

Reciprocity: When people respond to actions with similar actions. This can be positive, as in the exchanging of gifts, or negative, as with punitive eye-for-an-eye punishments for crimes.

Relativism: The belief there is no real objective universal truth and that we base all understanding upon perception and consideration.

Religion: The cultural system of behaviors, morals, ethics, and worldview in which humans deal with supernatural, metaphysical, and spiritual conceptions.

Retcon: Short for “retroactive continuity,” the term comes from comic books when previous canon or facts are ignored or contradicted so as to assimilate new stories or understandings in current storylines.

Reverberations and Repercussions: The understanding that any change within a world creates many expected and unexpected changes to the whole.

Rituals: Formal customs often involving gestures, words, and objects performed in a traditional sequence.

Rule of Cool: The understanding that the audience’s willing suspension of disbelief for a given element is directly proportional to its level of “coolness.”

Rule of Law: The idea that laws extend to the lawmakers as well as the general populous.

Rule of Three: In worldbuilding, the concept coined by Randy Ellefson in which an author should alter at least three components of a trope to make it their own.

Saturation: Mark J. P. Wolf’s term for when there are simply too many details for the audience to fully absorb, which he maintains makes the world stronger since it invites the audience to reexperience the material again and again to glean something new each time.

Scarcity: When people put higher value on rare things and assign lesser value to things in abundance.

Secondary Sexual Characteristics: The distinguishing traits that distinguish the sexes, such as human males’ facial hair or females’ breasts.

Secondary World: A created world that does not exist.

Selection: In biology, the preferential survival and reproduction or elimination of individuals with certain traits. Can be either artificial, natural, positive, or negative.

Separation: When an individual rejects the dominant culture in favor of preserving their original culture, which often leads to minority enclaves within the dominant culture

Sequel: Stories set in an existing world that follow the original story. They do not need to connect to the original story but often do.

Set Piece: An iconic scene that exemplifies the story even though it might not actually be necessary to the story itself.

Shamanism: The belief that specific individuals have access to and influence over the spiritual realm, usually derived by ritual and entering altered states.

Show Don't Tell: The understanding that the audience prefers to experience the worldbuilding details and storytelling events in action rather than having them explained.

Smeerp: Unnecessarily renaming something to make it seem exotic. Derived from James Blish’s sarcastic use of the term when describing rabbits.

Smeerp Hole: When one seemingly minor change contributes to a whole slew of other changes on the author’s part that add little to the audience experience as a whole.

Social Class: The hierarchal social stratification of groups, usually manifesting as upper, middle, and lower classes.

Socialism: The economic system in which the workers or government own and manage the means of production.

Socialization: The process in which a group passes on the worldviews, norms, and customs to their children.

Soft Deduction: When a character with knowledge of the worldbuilding takes action based upon specific information to get the worldbuilding rules across to the audience.

Soft Impart: Information presented to the audience not through narrative text but through a trustworthy side character or source. Can often come about from an overheard conversation or explanation from another character.

Specialization: The divisions of labor and creation of occupations when the population does not individually have to account for their daily caloric intake. As opposed to generalist.

Species: A group of living creatures capable of exchanging genetic material and producing viable offspring.

Speculative Fiction: An umbrella term for fiction that inject elements into the story that do not exist in the real world. Fantasy, science fiction, horror, historical fiction, alternative history, and dystopian and utopian fiction are just a few genres that qualify as speculative fiction.

Spotlighted/Lampshaded: A potentially troublesome concept or idea that is intentionally brought to the audience’s attention before it becomes problematic to highlight that it is intended as a fantasy conceit rather than an accidental anachronism.

Stasis: The drive to maintain the current order, be it social, political, or technological.

States: Organized governments overseeing a specific territory that can interact with other states.

Streamlining: Part of Sanderson’s third law of magic in which worldbuilding details should be accounted for by already existing fantasy conceits instead of creating whole new conceits.

Suspension of Disbelief: When an audience makes a choice to suspend their critical faculties to allow for a patently unreal concept to be considered logical for the sake of entertainment.

T-W

Taming: When an animal has been taught to tolerate human presence. As opposed to domestication.

Technobabble: When a character spouts a number of details to establish their expert credentials in the field. Technobabble is not meant to be understood by either the audience or the other characters, only to establish the character’s authority on the subject.

Terra De Facto: The implicit understanding that anything that is not accounted for by a fantasy conceit must therefore abide by the rules of the primary world.

Terrain: The vertical and horizontal proportions of land masses, which includes how high it is above sea level and at what slope.

Theocracy: A government where the religious leaders and practices control the laws in addition to the religious norms and rituals.

Toehold Details: Descriptors that specifically trigger the assumption of an analogue culture and time period, and therefore help the audience to mentally populate the scene.

Top-Down: In design, when the underlying idea or system is formed on a grand scale, then with all subsequent subsystems being added and refined until everything is mapped out. Also referred to as “planner” or “engineer” when it comes to writing or worldbuilding.

Totems: Imbued emblems representing a group of people tied to a specific spirit.

Transmedial: When a story or world exists in multiple mediums.

Tropes: Reoccurring motifs, images, plots, and characterization that exist within a genre.

Unchanged: When the creator does not use a particular fantasy conceit and leaves their created world the same as the real world in regards to this fantasy conceit. See Terra De Facto.

Unobtanium: In engineering, the term used for materials or technologies that do not yet exist but will one day solve current problems. Frequently used in science fiction worldbuilding.

Upmarket Fiction: The style of fiction that aims for creating discussion. It often blends literary and commercial fiction, deals with universal themes, has accessible language, and is character-driven.

Weakness: Limiting factors that diminish the power or the person using it. Part of Sanderson’s second law of magic.

Worldbuilding Capital: Time and mental energy sunk into a world, which is why authors frequently reuse the existing world instead of forming a new one for subsequent stories.

Worldbuilding Kudzu: When too many worldbuilding choke out the pertinent information by sheer volume, thus disrupting immersion.

Worldview: How a society or individual orients their knowledge and point of view towards the world. This includes philosophy, fundamentals, existential postulates, values and ethics, ideology, and attitude. It encompasses the concept of why the world works the way it does and the “correct” way to act within it.

Worship: The act of religious devotion towards a deity or ideal.

Source ⚜ More: Word Lists

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