#the jaylex line ever

[fournets]

thinking about the This Is Jay and im Very Proud of him line GEUHHHH

[solazu1]

I’ve seen so much shitty ship content in the marble hornets fandom since I’ve joined that I’m starting to get sick of shipping as a whole, ngl. I’m staring hard at the main contenders here, Jaylex, Brim, and Jam. Brilex is another ship I see frequently fucked up a lot too, but yea whatever. I’m not condemning people who get it wrong because I’m not the goddamn messiah of characterization either but there’s gotta be a line to be drawn, right? like with all the absurd vaguely uncensored abused x abuser content associated with jaylex, the uncomfortable brim content where every instance of hoody fucking up Tim's life on **PURPOSE** is ignored for the sake of a cuddle or for the sake of sexualization, THE HEAVY OVER-SEXUALIZATION OF BRILEX, and the fully fleshed out personalities of Tim and Jay being washed away and sacrificed for mischaracterized, stereotypical, romantic interactions that really isn’t something the character would ever do but rather something the author wants them to act out. <- honestly the last bit can be applied to all other ships too! And it isn’t my only gripe with Jam specifically but I feel like my specific criticism on it deserves another post that will probably never come haha.

[squarebracketsmileyface]

No one question why I'm up at 3:30am, I have a SONG

Entry 80 specifically for the lines:

"and the funny thing is I would have married you, if you'd have stuck around." For 'what could have been if Jay and Alex had done it right'

"I feel more free than I have in years, six feet under the ground." For 'Jay finally getting the one thing he so desperately wanted from Alex right before he died, letting him finally rest properly without a worry about how Alex actually feels'

"I had no choice in the matter, why would I? It's only the death of me." For 'Jay's general lack of control over his death and the fact that he didn't even ask Alex to tell him he loved him while he was bleeding out in his arms, Alex just chose to do that himself and it's both the best and the worst thing he could ever have said in that situation'

It's just so Jaylex in that fic (whenever I write it lol), the whole song kinda is, but those lines especially caught me, y'know?

[mouthsfullofsharpteeth]

i like the idea of pretentious book nerd/film nerd jaylex feeding into each other. jay goes THE BOOK WAS BETTER!! and alex hypes him up because of course the book was better, have you seen the acting and directing in that movie? or jay defending alexs choice in shitty silent french film because the symbolism and motifs are just so poetic and beautiful

theyre insufferable

YES EXACTLYYYY after the bickering dies down and they've realized how well they get along, they become just the most intense best friends ever. Jay would absolutely kill someone in the parking lot for insulting one of Alex's favorite niche pretentious movies, and Alex is Jay's biggest listener when it comes to hearing about the newest chapter Jay finished of whatever he's reading at the moment. And of course, because no class is perfect, they're also there for each other when they have to suffer through the absolute worst material ever. Alex reading a passage aloud for Jay and highlighting lines for him while Jay just blearily listens, face down in bed, unable to even comprehend what he's hearing because of how much the semester is killing him. And of course, Jay fills in for every single role, cast and crew, no matter what, for any project Alex needs. Jay becomes a familiar face to the other students in Alex's film class despite having never met him.

i like them

[mla0]

you know what, pop fly, Alex Kralie. One of my personal favorite girls ever

favorite thing about them: The tragedy inherent to the character

least favorite thing about them: Not enough from his POV though that's probably on purpose

favorite line: ALL OF THIS IS YOUR FAULT <- probably said with tears in his eyes

brOTP: i like pre-mh alex and brian being buddies. and of course alex and jay being buddies. he used to be a nice guy...

OTP: ehe...................................... timlex

nOTP: idfk ive never seen a horrendous alex ship before that i genuinely dislike. i dont ship jaylex but i wouldnt call it a notp

random headcanon: i love the scene alex headcanons so much. i think he'd be way too overly defensive about it as an adult as if it doesn't supremely fuck

unpopular opinion: if i see one more person act like alex is just some guy who turned evil for fun and is this super sadistic evil bastard and always has been etc. etc. im throwing them into an icy lake. fundamental misunderstanding of the character. i do not know if i have a more strongly held opinion than this to be honest. some people don't know how to have characters who are assholes sometimes but aren't "evil" either. nuance. alex was a victim 👍🏻😁

song i associate with them: get out while you can by get scared

favorite picture of them:

[neon-sparrows]

Jay “I called you because I can’t fall asleep.”

i’m in a jaylex mood. i’d apologize but also i’m not sorry because jaylex is good, damnit.always taking requests/suggestions!

Jay stares at the hotel room clock.

He doesn't know what to think. He's been trying to sleep for the past three hours, or something like that, and here he is, still wide awake. It feels like something's rattling around on the inside of his skull, after the encounter in the forest a few days ago--

He hasn't heard from Alex again since then. He's not sure if that worries him more than anything else, but there's still the lingering thought that they're in over their heads.

Jay reaches for his phone without thinking, flipping it open. The hotel room bed is at least better than his car trunk, or at least more comfortable, and the only problem is--

Alex is still at the top of his contacts list. He kept meaning to delete it, after getting outright ghosted, and yet--

His thoughts are coming too quickly, in fragmented and frustrating pieces, thinking faster than he can keep up with. Jay presses the button to dial and pushes his face into the pillow, listening as the phone begins to ring and ring and ring. He doesn't expect Alex to pick up. Why would he? He didn't when he ghosted him. He didn't when Jay found the tapes. He had been unreachable for years at this point, and Jay had certainly thought he was past this, and yet. And yet here he is, unable to sleep, thinking about that fucking monster in the woods, and wanting to hear Alex's voice again.

Idiot.

He's about to hang up when he hears the sound of an answer-- a genuine answer, too, not his voicemail.

"Jay."

His name. In Alex's voice. And Alex doesn't sound angry, either, he just sounds. Tired. Too tired. Jay lifts his face from the pillow and rolls over onto his back.

"Hey, Alex."

"It's late. Shouldn't you be sleeping?"

"I can't sleep."

They're in silence for a moment. He listens to Alex breathe on the other end of the line and feels comforted despite himself. He shouldn't. He should be angrier at Alex, bothered about what he did to Tim, the way he's been talking to him, he should be angry at him for not letting him help as much as he can and angrier about being ghosted for three years, and he feels comforted.

"Is it because of a couple days ago?" Alex's question is not accusatory and Jay feels pretty good about that.

"I guess."

Silence again. He wonders what Alex is thinking. He doesn't think he's telling him the truth, or has ever been telling him the truth, but at the same time he wants so badly to believe things are just the way Alex says. Anything to go back to normal, to go back to being stupid college kids in love and have the freedom to look forward to the future instead of-- instead of. Instead of.

Fuck.

"You should keep trying to get some rest."

"Alex--"

"You're not going to feel any better if you don't sleep, Jay."

"I don't think I'm going to feel any better regardless."

Alex is quiet. Jay closes his eyes.

"Can you just..." Jay starts. Stops. Chooses his words. "Hey, you remember that improv class we took together?"

"I do." Alex answers, and Jay smiles.

"You used to be pretty good at humor. I think you could've made Marble Hornets pretty great as a comedy. When we go back home, we should try that out."

When, he says.Like there is for sure a when.Like there’s a chance they’ll pack up and go home and act like nothing changed.

"Yeah." Alex says, with a huff of breath that might have been a laugh. "Yeah, maybe."

Jay nestles into the pillow again and curls his fingers tighter around the phone in his hand.

[squarebracketsmileyface]

Harvey by Alex g and Sarah by alex are jam coded

they areeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee they are they are they are

God they're just such a mess together. Both those songs are both of them talking about each other.

Like, in Harvey the last verse just makes me think of Tim having night terrors and waking up in the middle of the night, and like Jay doing his best to look after him. Cos i do think Tim definitely has night terrors and stuff like that in sorry its locked. I haven't thought much about Tim's issues and how they'd manifest in this lil AU (other than him being kinda like, I can fix him, about Jay a bit), cos SIL is kinda mostly about Jay and Alex, like, even when its about Jam its about Jaylex if that makes sense? I don't think Jay would ever actually say "I love you" to Tim, he probably would have eventually, but in the time they actually have together he only thinks it, he doesn't actually say it. Neither of them do. Tim's waiting for Jay to say it first, and that never happens.

He wakes up in the middle of the night I run in and turn on the light Run my hands through his short black hair I love you Harvey, I don't care

Anyway but like, then the second verse is definitely like Tim talking about Jay. He's constantly chasing after Jay, even when they're already dating and together and all that, Tim has to chase after Jay because Jay is still hung up on Alex, everything is about Alex to Jay, even when he knows it shouldn't be and he should let at least some things be about Tim. But even Tim being nice to him is about Alex in a way, because its about how different Tim is to Alex. Even once they're in a relationship, Jay's not gonna magically be fixed and stop being at least a little scared of intimacy and being vulnerable in a normal way. Vulnerability through kink? Sure, Jay can do that, because he still feels in control of that. If that gets too much he can safeword out. But vulnerability in general? That's more difficult, that leaves him feeling out of control and like he doesn't have a way out.

I'll chase Harvey through the door in the wall He says, "Never catch me, never miss me at all" Drool comes down from the corner of his mouth I say, "I love you Harvey, you cut it out"

Sarah

Then in Sarah the bit about not being able to be that someone needs is so them both about each other. Neither of them can be what the other needs. Tim because what Jay needs is to work on himself and fix himself before he can be healthily in a relationship with anyone, he can't be Jay's therapist, and that's what Jay actually needs. Jay kind of knows that, but to him he thinks he needs someone to love him better, to fix him for him by loving him enough, and that's just not how healing works. you have to do the work yourself with support from others. they can't do it for you.

For Jay he thinks Tim needs someone better than him, Jay's "I can't be what you need" is more about his own self loathing than about the reality of the situation. Though, he's not completely wrong, Tim does need him to fix himself before he can be what Tim "needs" in their relationship. Because as Jay is currently, they can't be in a healthy relationship, not long term at least. Over time it'd all spiral out of control and they'd end up resenting each other, unless Jay actually agreed to get help, and worked to make that help, yknow, help.

I can't be what you need I am stuck in a dream I am stuck in a dream Don't you know she's been here all along in a dream? She belongs in a dream

The first two lines make me think of Tim thinking about how Jay deals with difficult situations. He runs away. The second Jay thinks something's going wrong, he runs away, whether physically or emotionally. Like, in chapter 3 when Jay just assumed Tim was going to abandon him like Alex had after showing real interest in him for the first time. Jay ran away. Only to the car park, but he was planning on running all the way away once he got his keys and shit from the room he and Tim were sharing. Jay's definitely not gonna stop running away, he might literally run away less, but he'll still distance himself emotionally when he doesn't need to. Or at least that's how i'm planning on writing him. god knows if i'll go through with it, but i plan to.

Sarah runs to feel the burning in her lungs And clear her head

There's a couple other lines that are like Tim talking about Jay. The line about "she loves me like a dog" is so Jay. he does love Tim like a dog, he follows him around like a lost puppy and he's obsessed with him like a dog is with their One Person. And he doesn't say anything about it, whereas Tim is pretty happy to tell Jay what he's thinking and feeling. Maybe he doesn't tell Jay everything, but he tells Jay a lot more than Jay tells him. Jay does that thing where he makes it sound like he's telling you a lot more than he is by repeating the same information in different words over and over again.

She loves me like a dog And when we mess around, I'll let her know the truth I found

[squarebracketsmileyface]

if we're talking about fob songs and sorry it's locked, may I suggest "American beauty/American Psycho"

specifically the lines

"I think I fell in love again, maybe I just took too much cough medicine"

"us we were pity sex, nothing more and nothing less"

and "all those dirty thoughts of me, they were never yours to keep"

ooooooooooooo so trueeee, it works for so much of S,IL honestly, like there are some lines that work for Jay and Tim, some for Jay and Alex in uni, some for Jay and Alex during MH, like. Perfect

little lyric analysis thingy under the thingy bobber

"I think I fell in love again, Maybe I just took too much cough medicine" Like, this one feels like Jay and Tim, specifically how I first planned to write them getting together which was gonna take a lot longer, because Jay was basically gonna go the Alex route and refuse to believe he liked Tim (tho not because he didn't wanna be gay, just because he still felt really fucking hurt by everything that happened with Alex) like, he was gonna make all sorts of ridiculous excuses for ages about why he couldn't possibly like Tim in that way. And I did kinda keep that in a little bit in chapter 3 of S,IL i think, just not to the same extent as i had it in the original plan.

The idea of Jay blaming medicine for his feelings towards Tim could be so interesting though, especially with the whole thing about Tim sharing his meds with Jay after they ran into the Operator in entry 72 and Jay had his seizure. Like, idk it feels like the kinda straws Jay would grasp at (especially since he seems to resistant to getting professional help for anything) as another excuse he'd use to avoid going to the doctors to get medication of his own.

"I'm the best worst thing that hasn't happened to you yet, The best worst thing" This line is definitely Jay and Alex in uni, it just is. They are both the best worst things that have happened to each other. Nearly all their problems stem from each other and their relationships over the years, whether that's platonic or sexual or whatever. And like, yeah Alex would probably have ended up getting tangled up with the Operator no matter what, but I do feel like everything would have been different (in S,IL as well as the canon) if he and Jay hadn't been as close as they were/known each other. because without Jay rediscovering the tapes Alex gave him, the MH youtube channel wouldn't have happened and Jay would most likely have just gone on with his life none the wiser, same with Tim. Brian would probably have been the only one still in at least a similar situation.

Also "best worst thing" is a weirdly nice descriptor, it scratches my brain a lot. And "best worst thing that hasn't happened to you yet" is perfect for main series Jaylex because like, the best worst thing that will ever happen to Jay? Dying in Alex's arms (cos that's what i wanna happen in S,IL. I want Jay to die in Alex's arms with Alex crying and telling him he loves him)

"You take the full, full truth, then you pour some out" is just chapter 3 of If It Ain't Broken lol. Like, literally this is what happens in that Chapter (which i should be uploading tomorrow? Maybe tonight but most likely tomorrow). Jay talks to his friends and only really tells them half of the truth and keeps the rest for himself so that he doesn't look like a bad person. its great. he's such a little bastard man and I love him. "And as we're drifting off to sleep, All those dirty thoughts of me, They were never yours to keep" Just like Alex in general wasn't Jay's to keep, especially not after what I have planned for chapter 6 :DDDD but like, to me this feels like it just kinda ties in with all of the stuff Jay and Alex avoided. Like, they never fucked in a bed, Jay never slept over after they hooked up, Alex never used sweet pet names with Jay unless it's during aftercare where he can pass it off as 'just being a good dom' and not have to own his words etc. Like, idk why that lyric just feels like the same kinda thing as all those.

"Us, we were pity sex, nothing more and nothing less" is Alex downplaying everything that happened in chapter 1 of S,IL. Like, you now in chapter 2 where he tells Jay he only called him baby and stuff like that because he was pretending he was Amy? That. It's Alex pretending that them sleeping together again, in a bed this time, and Jay staying there overnight didn't mean anything when really they did. They meant a whole lot to him, but then he realised it had been a bad idea because it'd make Jay get attached to him again and make Jay even more dead set on finding out what's going on, so he had to scramble for something to drive Jay away all over again.