#the hollywood tower hotel preservation society

[mrbellcaptain]

August 17th, 2017 - Hollywood Tower Hotel Preservation Society - Building the Twilight Zone Tower of Terror

Hello everyone and welcome to the next installment of The Hollywood Tower Hotel Preservation Society - Building the Twilight Zone Tower of Terror. Today I will update everyone on progress on the model and what to expect going forward. Let us begin with the left side of the lobby. In the previous update I completed the archways and some small detail pieces, and was starting on the walls surrounding the left side.

After the walls were completed the doorways at the back of  the lobby needed to be sketched out. These pieces are extremely detailed and feature gorgeously done woodwork (on the real doors). Notably I did not sketch the handles and levers for the doors, as I figured modeling them and 3D printing them would only end up being a hassle. I will instead model them by hand, although how I have not yet decided.

(Above) Here is the entire left side. Later on I will change the upper sections and replace them with smaller, more detailed parts.

Starting on the main entryway. This piece was probably the hardest thing I have yet drawn. It was so detailed and took me well over 3 days of work to get to a state that I liked and felt comfortable with.

The finished arch/entryway (above).

Starting to enclose the lobby now. Copying over wall sections and drawing some mirror pieces.

(Above) Here is the front desk. Another part that I thought would be difficult but proved easy after I realized the designs were simply the same ones from the doors. Luckily they fit perfectly and didn’t require any redrawing to make work.

(Above) The full front desk, both inside and out.

Now for the biggest news of this update. Last week I ordered my 3D printer it was shipped out yesterday. Shortly I should be getting it and the real building process can begin. It is extremely exciting after almost 13 years of trying to find a way to build a model of this to finally have all the pieces falling into place. Also be on the lookout for a video coming up soon of my design process for drawing the doors featured at the beginning of this post! That’s all for now, thank you all for dropping in! - Mr. Bellcaptain

[rtwlovers]

Our China Crash Course

Our adventure through China was an absolute whirlwind that covered almost 3,000 miles in 10 days. To see China in that amount of time is like taking a 10 day trip to see New York, D.C., LA, and Seattle. It was absolutely insane.

But we had a good reason for the quickness—Blakely’s family came to join us and they only had a small window. We enjoyed the company (and the upgrade in accommodations!).

We started in Hong Kong, which is a great gateway into China since it is much more connected to the outside world. Reminder: the Chinese government significantly limits news flow of its citizens, and this makes them culturally cut off from the rest of society. While Hong Kong technically falls under Chinese jurisdiction, it was a British colony until 1997 when the Brits returned it to China. Hong Kong maintains a separate political and economic system from China, but the mainland significantly influences the legislation. China continues to broker more influence, and unfortunately protests don’t make much difference despite making international news.

Blakely and Ryan arrived 2 days earlier than the rest of the group, which was best as we were VERY dusty from our time in Nepal. We stayed at the Kowloon Shangri-la Hotel, which, as could be expected, were MUCH better accommodations than our norm.

We enjoyed the hotel then headed to explore the city. Of course, a highlight for us was the spectacular architecture. As city folk we really appreciate a good skyscraper, and Hong Kong has plenty of those! Hong Kong has a gorgeous skyline, with more skyscrapers than anywhere in the world, and Victoria Harbor elevates the view further. Ryan’s favorites were the HSBC Building, International Commerce Center and Bank of China Tower. Then we went to Man Mo temple, which is dedicated to the gods of literature and war. The incense and atmosphere make it a calm and gorgeous stop.

That night, we headed to the fabulous SoHo neighborhood (not to be confused with the SoHo in NYC, this stands for South of Hollywood Road) which has one of our favorite features: escalator sidewalks. First we hit a wine and cheese bar, and then one of our favorite restaurants Little Bao. So fun, so delicious, and everything we needed.

Finally, the rest of the group arrived. We didn’t pause long before taking them on a walking tour the neighborhood. Then for dinner, we headed to the world renowned Din Tai Fung restaurant for delicious dumplings and noodles. Finally, we headed to Temple Street Night Market for a bit of chaos and shopping! Unfortunately the market is MUCH more glitz than glamor, and as many things in China, focused on the shiny quantity over quality!

The next day was a big one. We started on a tram up to Victoria Peak to see the sights,. Due to the crazy fog, the view half-way up was better. Then we took a boat tour to see the floating village of Aberdeen and the temples there. Afterwards, a little tea time at the Peninsula hotel, then cocktails while watching the harbor light show.

Next, we jetted off to Guilin and immediately went to the gorgeous Reed Flute cave. In case the natural structure isn’t enough, the gorgeous light displays make the cave even more mystical and impressive (though a few thought they were tacky and preferred the natural landscape!). In Guilin, we stayed at the beautiful Guilin Shangri-la Hotel.

Next on the itinerary was a drive out to Longji, with hiking to see the gorgeous rice paddies. Absolutely worth the hike (to say nothing of needing to work off those dumplings!), this was a trip highlight for all of us.

That night we took a light cruise around the lakes of Guilin. The Chinese LOVE a light show, and we were pretty impressed ourselves!

The next day was a highlight: A boat cruise along the Li River. This site has inspired painters and artists for centuries, and it inspired the artwork on the 50 yen note today. Blakely couldn’t resist the beauty recreated by a local artist on rice paper, which is now hanging in our house!

After the day’s craziness, we took a flight to Xian and settled into the Wyndham Grand Xian hotel, another fabulous place!

Xian attracts visitors from all over the world with the incredible Terracotta Warriors. Even with all of the hype, they do NOT disappoint. Here’s the skinny:

When the first Emperor of China Qin Shi Huang died around 210 BC, he was buried with an army he commissioned to protect him in the afterlife. There are approximately 8,000 soldiers, 130 chariots, 520 horses and 150 cavalry horses. Additionally, there are officials, acrobats, strongmen and musicians. All of the statues are life sized, uniquely carved and painted, and buried in different sized pits. The largest of the pits is housed in the museum for viewing. It is INSANE to see.

Even cooler: the army is just a portion of the remains left to be discovered. Excavation is ongoing, but ground-penetrating radar detects a larger city resembling the emperor’s imperial palace and court. Next we gobbled down some delicious beef noodle soup!

The next day we had a gorgeous bike ride around Xian’s ancient city walls, which were built in the 14th Century and form one of the best-preserved fortresses in the world. After earning our treat, we had a walk through the Great Tang All Day Mall and celebrated with Popsicles and BBQ. This is a market of which we all approved!

After Xian we flew to Shanghai and got to visit the historic and beautiful Zhujiajiao village. We felt like we stepped back in time! We had a canal cruise, did a little shopping (of course) and went to see a historic mansion with traditional Chinese gardens.

Shang Hai was absolutely our favorite city in mainland China, with a gorgeous skyline and metropolitan atmosphere. As discussed, we love cities. We walked along the river and had a fabulous dinner before enjoying one of THE most bizarre and fantastic shows we’d ever seen: The Amazing Acrobats of Shanghai. We will never be able to see another acrobat show again.

The following day the boys and girls separated, and the boys took a tour of the mind blowing Shang hai port. Afterwards we all flew to our last stop (WHEW) Beijing.

The next day was a highlight and it started with Tian’anmen Square. According to our official guide it is “the largest city square in the world” (it is actually only one of the top 10) “and the spiritual heart of China, where the national flag is raised exactly at sunrise every day.” Of course, what isn’t mentioned in the paraphernalia is that this square is infamous for the horrendous massacre of protestors in 1989. Troops with automatic rifles and tanks killed hundreds of demonstrators who were trying to block the military’s advance to the square (where a student protest was happening).

Today, Tian’anmen is a heavily regulated area and indicative of Chinese policy in general. Before entry, visitors and their belongings are searched and IDs checked. Protests are strictly forbidden, and discussion of the massacre nonexistent. Furthermore, in the 70s the square held ginormous portraits of 6 dictators (including Karl Marx, Vladimir Lenin, and Joseph Stalin), but upon the death of Mao Sedong (founding father of the People’s Republic of China) the other portraits were removed and only his remains. Don’t worry, the other portraits are still brought out in a parade around the square on Labor Day and National Day.

For all its dark past, Tian’anmen Square allows entrance to one of the coolest places in China: The Forbidden City. The Forbidden City is a palace complex in Central Beijing and housed the imperial palace from 1420-1912. Now, it is a Palace Museum and provides an excellent snapshot of gorgeous Chinese architecture, artwork, and artefacts. Our personal favorite was the Hall of Clocks, a display of 200 clocks and watches from the imperial collection.

Last stop for the day, we visited the Temple of Heaven, a complex of religious buildings that was visited yearly by emperors to ensure a good harvest.

Ok. Now for the part we’ve all been waiting for. The famous symbol of China, an architectural wonder of the world, stretching 6,700 km and over 2,000 years old: The Great Wall of China.

The wall was constructed over many different dynasties to protect the ever-changing empire borders. The most extensive and modern construction occurred as recently as the 14th Century. Effectiveness of the wall varied, and our guide informed us that bribery decreased the walls success. Unfortunately, with the invention of air invasion, the wall was largely unproductive in modern era. That said, it is magnificent to see.

Though it can’t be seen from the moon (common misconception), it can be seen from space at a low orbit when the conditions are right.

Maybe one of our favorite parts was the ride down. Take a look.

To get to the wall we enjoyed the Sacred Path, which is lined with animals, mystical beasts and officials who serve the emperor in his afterlife. Sitting emperors perform rituals there for the ancestors once a year.

Our last stop in China was one of our favorites: The Summer Palace. This was an imperial summer resort of the Qing Dynasty and it has gorgeous grounds that are the recognized as the most splendid classical gardens of China. The incredible decoration on the buildings made us constantly look up, and we loved finishing our trip with such a gorgeous example of Chinese art. Our only complaint was that we visited on a holiday so we felt like all of China was there with us! One thing is for sure: China has a LOT of people!

So ended our blitz through China, and if you’re tired from reading it you can imagine how tired we were for doing it! The only answer: a blissful vacation to Bali.

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The 6 Most WTF Hollywood Depictions Of Donald Trump

Before he became the inciting incident in the post-apocalyptic thriller that is our age, Donald Trump spent most of his life cultivating the image of a disgustingly wealthy businessman and cameo-worthy celebrity. He was the rich bully of his time, inspiring many movies and TV shows to feature barely fictionalized versions of him as villainous characters meant to symbolize the greed and cynicism of 1980s capitalism. Interestingly, none of the following examples ever went so far as to imagine a future in which this character would become president.

6

A Trumpian New York City Developer Starts A Hate Campaign Against The Ninja Turtles

It was only a matter of time before the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles squared off against the most quintessential of all New York City foes: rising property values.

In the fourth season of the original Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles show, the Turtles are beleaguered by real estate magnate and rotund blowhard Fenton Q. Hackenbrush, who runs the not so subtly named Donald J. Lofty Enterprises. Hackenbrush wants to demolish the sewers completely and turn them into Donald J. Lofty luxury condos. For that, he needs the Turtles to disappear. (If Hackenbrush is anything like the real Trump, he probably thinks the Turtles are the wrong color to live in one of his buildings.)

In an interview with April O’Neil, Hackenbrush sells his greedy plans to the public on the basis that his sewer reconstruction will “flush out the worst menace in the city: the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles.” Of course, the people of New York don’t have any problems with the Turtles, so Hackenbrush forces a group of employees to dress up in those bad Turtle Halloween costumes we all used to wear and go commit crimes.

Then an evil turtle named Slash arrives in the city, and Hackenbrush immediately mocks him as “some kind of foreigner,” but then bribes him into sowing mayhem, fanning the flames of turtle racism.

Hackenbrush is eventually exposed by some ace reporting by O’Neil (New York Times, pay attention). As punishment, he is loudly fired by the actual owner of the company, Mr. Lofty — who looks surprisingly a lot like Fred Trump, Donald’s father. We’re not saying TMNT intentionally created a world in which Fred Trump would repeatedly yell “You’re fired” at his heir, but that’s immediately the best Trump origin story we’ve ever heard.

5

The Devil’s Advocate Features A Rich Murderer Who Owns Trump Tower

In The Devil’s Advocate, Al Pacino is the titular Devil (not a spoiler; you don’t cast Pacino in a movie about Satan and make him the lovable dad), who has set up a law firm in New York in order to subvert justice and release evil into society. And who is Satan’s favorite client? The guy who lives atop Trump Tower.

Though it is slightly inaccurate, since he never claims to have the best murders ever, just fantastic.

Alexander Cullen, played by a suitably balding Craig T. Nelson, is a Trump-esque real estate mogul accused of murdering his wife, stepson, and maid — dire straits for a guy based on someone who once bragged he could shoot a person in the middle of the street and get away with it. His arrest immediately prompts Pacino’s law firm of Fire, Brimstone & Ham to send their new ace attorney, Kevin Lomax (Keanu Reeves wearing his dad’s suit), to defend Cullen. Why? Because, oddly, he’s Lucifer’s best client, having racked up “16,242” billable hours in one year. That’s a lot of shady business.

Warner Bros. Pictures 1.85 years of shady business, to be exact.

But being a hated New York business tycoon and employing a massive team of evil lawyers doesn’t necessarily mean Cullen is a Trump clone, right? Luckily, for the sake of subtlety, when we finally arrive at Cullen’s home, we see that it’s literally Trump’s apartment in Trump Tower. The filmmakers managed to rent it out, preserving its natural appearance as Liberace’s mind palace.

Warner Bros. Pictures

Warner Bros. Pictures “Try not to touch anything — you’ll get metal poisoning.”

In the end, Cullen is found not guilty, despite Lomax knowing that he murdered those people, thereby finally giving in to his true nature as the son of Satan. That’s right, the Devil’s son loses his innocence by defending Trump. Burn.

4

A Sci-Fi TV Show Villain Morphs Into Donald Trump … Played By Donald Trump

Night Man was a late ’90s low-budget TV show based on the Malibu Comics series about a San Franciscan saxophone player who can sense evil and wears a laser eye. Despite that, it somehow managed to run for two seasons, possibly because of its reliance on magnificently bizarre cameos — none of which were more utterly mystifying than Donald J. Trump in technically the only real acting credit to his name.

In this episode, Night Man is chasing a face-changing villain called Face to Face, who decides to engage in some quick identity theft to make a large withdrawal from the bank. Who better to transform into than the self-proclaimed richest man in the universe, Donald Trump? (No really, please suggest someone better.) In one of the most perfect sequences in the history of the medium, Face to Face slowly morphs into The Donald, dazzling audiences with peak mid ’90s CGI while simultaneously reinforcing the idea that Trumps looks like a melting Claire Danes.

Donald Trump — remember, this is the real Donald Trump playing a man who has shapeshifted into Donald Trump — walks into a delightfully green-screened bank, and then sits down with the bank manager to illegally withdraw $10,000. Sadly, the nuanced layers of a real man pretending to be a fake man pretending to be him do not translate to Trump’s performance:

Could they not find a real bank that would allow Trump to walk in?

Weirdly, in his utter boredom and bad acting, something spectacular happens: Trump seems … nice. He’s subdued, polite, even charming. It seems that all you need to do to make Trump likable is carefully control what he says and make sure he’s not physically in the same room with any human beings.

3

A Disney Show Paired Donald Trump With A Dead Pirate

Before Disney found a way to become rich off Johnny Depp wearing a lot of eyeliner, it first got its pirate feet wet with The 100 Lives Of Black Jack Savage, a lighthearted romp wherein the undead spirit of a mass murderer teams up with a fictional Donald Trump analogue to save both of their souls from burning forever in hell.

Luckily, Disney would never reuse “Jack Savage,” or his ship the Black Bird, or anything like it ever again.

When Daniel Tarberry, a rich real estate mogul from New York, has to flee the country because of legal troubles, he buys a luxurious Caribbean mansion to lie low in, but doing so summons the ghost of Black Jack Savage, who was hanged on the island for his crimes. The two are now forced to save the lives of 100 people in order to save themselves from eternal damnation.

Tarberry is a greedy shark who insists on hanging a portrait of himself in every hotel room he owns and constantly tries to weasel out of paying his contractors a dime. He’s not very respectful to women, referring to every lady who talks back to him as “the poster girl for PMS.” He’s also a straight up racist, first assuming Black Jack is his cabin boy, then loudly exclaiming that he wants to change all the locks because he “found a black man in my kitchen.”

The writers had intended to start Tarberry off as a real piece of Trump, only to eventually learn from his mistakes and become a better man. He even occasionally refrains from treating Black Jack like some weird Jim Crow genie.

But the show never got to the redemption part, as the network pulled it after only seven poorly rated episodes. Believing that people are interested in seeing a Trump redemption story might have been the most misjudged part of The 100 Lives Of Black Jack Savage — a Disney show that opens with a black man being lynched.

2

Gremlins 2 Had Trump Fight Gremlins

Nobody really expected Gremlins to get a sequel, especially not its creators. And when it did, no one could have predicted that the real villain wouldn’t be gremlins, but the world’s most notorious New York City mogul.

Director Joe Dante wanted to have the Gremlins run amok in a fancy New York skyscraper. But the movie still needed a villain, a rich guy so obnoxious that audiences wouldn’t feel bad about watching midnight demons tear him several new assholes. And then it hit Dante: “At that time in New York City, there was one major character who was Mr. Billion.”

At the time, Trump was known for being “overbearing and obviously kind of goofy,” said the film’s writer, Charles S. Haas. “He was an emblem of what was going on in the ’80s and ’90s with greed and money and crassness, and [the idea of] the whole world being for sale.” And so they created powerful millionaire Daniel Clamp, a Trumpian mogul (with a dash of Ted Turner) who also happens to be running violent animal experiments in his tower Clamp Center.

Actor John Glover modeled his performance of Clamp on the director, whom he saw as “incredibly gentle, supporting and encouraging,” rather than on Trump, which is why Clamp can say weirdly racist nonsense like “Let���s lose the elm trees. People see elm, they think Dutch. [pause] Disease” and still sound like a swell boss. It’s also why we unreservedly root for Clamp when he shoves a Gremlin into a paper shredder.

And also because he seems to be the only one who realizes gremlins aren’t that difficult to kill.

Consequently, Gremlins 2: The New Batch offers a peek at an alternate universe in which Nice Trump helps us fight small-minded rage goblins, as opposed to the universe we live in, where those goblins got him elected president.

1

Sesame Street Thinks Donald Trump Is Garbage

Over its nearly 50-year history, Sesame Street has striven to be not just entertainment, but also a tool to teach children. And many times over, it has tried to teach them that Donald Trump is the king of the trash people.

The first time we encounter Sesame‘s Trump is in ’88, as a grouch named Ronald Grump. Grump is trying to con fellow grouch Oscar into letting him build a three-trash-can-high Grump Tower on his spot in return for a “duplex can-dominium.” Oscar simply adores Grump at first, because he exemplifies grouch values, as “his name is on every piece of trash in town.” Grump is also grouch-famous for building “a swamp in a day,” a line so apt that the Sesame Street writers should get a retroactive Emmy for it.

“What about dumpsters?”

However, Grump immediately tries to evict Oscar for keeping pets in his fantastic, just the best tower. This forces all the Sesame Street residents to band together to buy Grump off with their garbage, making the first lesson most American kids learned about Donald Trump was that they need to pay him to go away before he ruins everything.

Donald Grump returns during the show’s 2005 parody of The Apprentice, in which lesser grouches are fighting for the privilege to assist Grump in peddling his trash all across town. After a series of pointless tasks, Elmo, whose hard work and positive attitude wins the day, immediately gets fired by Grump, who exclaims, “I can’t have a good helper! I got my reputation to think of.”

However, the Trump animosity really boiled over during the Street‘s 25th anniversary show in 1993. The entire special episode revolves around the residents of Sesame Street fighting Grump (this time expertly portrayed by human forehead vein Joe Pesci), who’s trying to convert the entire block into a garish Grump Tower. At first he sweetly attempts to convince them that having their street become an overpriced boutique is a good thing. But when the residents don’t agree, Grump starts threatening Muppets like they’re in Goodfellas.

Fortunately, Grump’s plans fall apart because Oscar and his trash heap (which are on city property) keep Grump from selling a single condo. Furious, he rips up his plans and screams that Sesame Street didn’t deserve a Grump Tower anyway. So that’s charm, bully, and now abandonment. If the show had ended with Grump taking Oscar to court for loss of potential revenue, Sesame Street would have achieved the quadfecta of the Trump negotiation style long before Nancy Pelosi coined it.

Since he became president, Trump has not been shy about his desire to gut PBS, the public station that was home to Sesame Street until 2016. We can’t help but think that Ronald Grump has something to do with that.

Cedric will never stop politicizing Muppets. The best way to boycott his leftist agenda is by following him on Twitter but then never interacting with him in any shape or form. That’ll show him.

Why should you have to deal with the Trump presidency alone? Make your cats miserable too with this Donald Trump cat costume.

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[mrbellcaptain]

Back in early 2004 The Twilight Zone Tower of Terror opened at Disney’s California Adventure. I was obsessed from the first time I stepped into the remains of this once luxurious Hollywood retreat. That summer I set about designing a model of the Tower out of LEGOs. This was no easy feat and took a good portion of a year to do. Using a program called LEGOCAD I set about testing various designs. The one featured here is the second version and started with just a simple build of the wall of the Lobby that faces into the garden courtyard of the Tower. The second set of pieces I built were the upper floors where “The Hollywood Tower Hotel” sign would be fitted.

As many fans of the attraction will notice I placed an extra set of elevator doors on the far left and center elevator shafts. This is due to being able to see the model from all angles and not wishing to build some of the uglier backstage elements (such as air vents seen on the “roof”). On the actual attraction the lightning scar hides many rooftop elements that wouldn’t, in the “reality” of the building’s mythos, be there as the removed wings were floors with elevator shafts and rooms. I substituted the rooftop for floors similar to the removed sections above it. I also took inspiration from Disney Experience’s Tower of Terror Paper Model that also had 4 elevator door sets on the center and left shafts. This is again likely due to the model being seen from more angles than the actual attraction.

Another note is the color choices on certain parts of the building. The domes are a dark grey color, matching the window frames and fences. The “floors” are blue and red as opposed to the muted green and brown found on the actual attraction. These were design choices I made based on LEGO colors that were available at the time.

Building with LEGOs offered many difficult challenges and this design certainly has some of those difficulties featured loud and clear. What I did manage though was to capture the spirit of the attraction and the elements I wanted to show. Looking at this you can instantly see The Hollywood Tower Hotel as it once stood. Even still this version did not turn out to be the final, and even still, no version has been built by me personally. A few LEGO fans have built this model using my designs with my permission and can be found easily on the internet. I hope to some day return to the LEGO Tower of Terror model, but for now I will continue to work on the model I am currently designing and building. I hope soon to have some physical work to show off here, but for now, designs and artwork are all I have. Thank you for joining me here on my blog and for dropping in on this Throwback Thursday special!

[mrbellcaptain]

Goodbye from The Hollywood Tower Hotel

I know this is really long, but I need to open up somewhat about this. For those of you that do read this, thank you.

“Hollywood, 1939 …”

Those words ring loudly in my head and have ever since May, 2004. I was 12 at the time and had avoided thrill rides adamantly up to that point. That single day in 2004 changed everything for me.

It started back in November of the previous year. I had received an annual pass for Disneyland for my birthday. I hadn’t been there since 1997 and couldn’t remember what the place was even like. At the time, Disney was seen as a kids thing. Being the preteen I was, I avoided talking about it among my friends for fear of being seen as less “cool.” This first trip was also the first time I’d see Disney’s California Adventure. As it had opened in 2001, I had not had a chance to go and experience it.

Upon arrival at the esplanade I was shocked to see this building looming over DCA’s skyline. My family and I debated what it was and if it was even in the park or just in Anaheim beyond. The words “The Hollywood Tower Hotel” stood out among the skyline. We were confused to say the least. This “hotel” didn’t feel like one as much as it looked like it. Our curiosity was piqued so we booked it into Sunshine Plaza and down through the Hollywood Picture’s Backlot. As we reached the Hyperion and turned the corner we were met with … Walls. But these walls made me the most excited I had ever been. Along the stretch of construction walls that lined the street were the words “The Twilight Zone Tower of Terror. Opening May 2004. Drop in … If you dare.” I was blown away. I thought I had never heard of this attraction before and shamefully learned I did know of it quite well when I got home that evening.

I was a big fan of The Twilight Zone television series having been raised with it among other classic shows of the 50’s, 60’s and 70’s. The Twilight Zone was paranormal, exciting, easy to grasp but complex in nature. It was everything I enjoyed in tv. To have an attraction entirely themed around it excited me. I was deeply curious about it so I jumped into researching it. Mind you, I had seen the Tower of Terror television movie but I never pieced it together that it was, in itself, based on something real. When I finally saw WDW’s Tower I was awestruck. I researched everything I could about it. I looked deeply into the attraction through fan sites and low resolution videos. I couldn’t get enough.

January 1st, 2004. I had made it a point to watch the Tournament of Roses Parade every year and this year was no different. I got up and watched in wonder as parade float after parade float turned the corner and showed off it’s detail. Late into the broadcast a looming building came into frame. It was so noticeable that even the broadcasters commented on it before it turned the corner. At 100 feet tall, the float “A Sudden Drop in Pitch” made me bounce off the walls. This floral ode to the coming haunted Hollywood retreat just blew my mind. Again I was energized. As the clock ticked down to May, I kept up with the attraction. I watched video after video, many of which seem to have been lost to time. Gallagher and the sign lighting ceremony stands out as one of the stranger ones.

Finally, May arrived. I booked it to Anaheim about the second or third week of it’s opening. The lines were massive (for the time) but I stood there, eagerly awaiting my turn to “drop into the zone.” The lobby was lavishly furnished, every crack and speck of dust seeming to tell a story. Everything stood out to me and I could barely soak it all in. When we entered the library I stood in wided eyed wonder at the shelves of books and the raging storm just beyond the window. With a flash of lightning came the story of that fateful night long ago. The eerie intro, the echoes of a child singing, the thunderstorm just beyond. I was lost. Dragged into an episode of Rod Serling’s anthology of terror. As our huddled group wandered into the boiler room the sound of pipes clanging and furnaces roaring gave life to this dead building. The heart was still beating, long after it’s veins had rusted and faded. The gloomy bellhops throughout encouraged our group forward, helping us deeper into the depths of the hotel. As we arrived at the service elevator, my heart was racing. I was nervous, I was scared, and I was excited. I stood with sweaty hands watching the dial slide down slowly to “B.” The doors opened to our final bellhop who loaded us into our rickety elevator. The sounds of screams echoed throughout. Everyone was nervous. With a devious smile the bellhop bid farewell and the doors closed on us.

A lurch backwards and flashes of lightning dragged us beyond the depths of the Tower and to the front door of The Twilight Zone. I gripped the handlebars of the elevator seats tightly. I was terrified but entranced. We moved up and in front of us was a grand mirror. A bolt of lightning and we turned into ghostly reflections of ourselves. In a flash we were gone. The empty elevator carriage sat staring back at us. We descended to a long stretched hallway. 5 ghostly apparitions beckoned us to follow them. The hallway grew dark, stars glittering all around. Those same 5 guests beckoned one final time from a distance set of elevator doors, then they were gone.

We plunged into darkness.

As the sunlight stung my eyes, I could see everything. In those couple seconds I viewed the distant horizon of Disneyland and Anaheim. Before I could even process it we were falling.

When the elevator came to a rest with clanging and bangs, cheers erupted from our elevator. We had survived. As we returned to reality we were greeted by our haunting bellhop one final time before we drifted toward the gift shop.

I was in love. Everything about this ride captivated me. In one single ride in May I became obsessed. I collected everything I could afford. I bought pins, I got shirts, picture frames, posters. You name it, I tried my best to buy it.

That summer I spent working on a digital rendering of the Tower of Terror in LEGO form. I wanted a replica of this attraction for me. I wanted my Hollywood Tower Hotel. I spent weeks studying every angle, looking at picture after picture. I tried so hard to detail this model out of little blocks. When I finally finished and sat back, I was, for the first time, impressed with myself. There in front of me was a LEGO rendering of the Tower of Terror. I immediately set to work. I used every LEGO brick I had and when I ran out, I bought more. After the 6th tub of bricks I stopped. It was getting too expensive. With the need to paint the LEGOs afterwords, I shelved the project till I could reasonably get everything I needed.

Still, I ached for replicas. My brain kept latching to LEGOs and after a couple years I tried again on LEGO’s official Digital Designer program. As I reached the half way mark, I decided to check the price for the massive Tower of bricks I needed. The program promptly crashed. I selected a third of the building and copied it elsewhere, then tried again. After a few minutes the price popped up. $1800. I gasped and was discouraged. I couldn’t realistically shell out almost $2000 for just a segment of a massive project. Again I shelved the project and looked for alternatives. I stumbled on a now defunct YouTube channel HomeImagineering. The channel featured someone building custom miniature attraction variants using materials like foamcore. I also stumbled on Sam Towler’s Mine Train model and was inspired. My dad ended up bringing me home some foamcore poster board and I went to work. I carved windows and doors. I tried to shape out the Tower of Terror with foam and paper. It made a terrible mess and I was never able to figure out how to best support the massive structure. Eventually I shelved this project too.

As DCA started it’s 2.0 conversion I was at the parks almost every other week. Tower was my go to for a must ride attraction. I had memorized everything about it. The layout, the script, the drops. I loved it still. It was a classic to me and I desired nothing more than to be a bellhop. I started applying but got nowhere. It wasn’t until fall 2012 that I hit the jackpot. I was hired on October 13th, 2012 as a DCA Stores cast member. I started on Buena Vista Street and came to know many great people through that fall and subsequent winter. I still ached for Tower. I wanted to get photo training so I could work the gift shop, but my true dream was to transfer to attractions and fight my way to Tower. Unfortunately that dream fell short. I quit Disney in late April 2013 due to medical problems making it hard for me to continue working. I dreamed of going back, but for the time I set my dream aside to focus on school.

In February of 2016, a rumor sprouted that the Tower of Terror at DCA was to be changed to a Guardians of the Galaxy ride. I was scared. A part of me tried to ground reality and tell myself that it was way too stupid to be real. There’s always rumors and they almost never happen. As time moved forward the rumor persisted. The original leak kept insisting it was real and continued to detail the changes to come. Petitions popped up, attempting to fight the truth in the rumor.

In July, 2016, at Comic Con San Diego, Disney announced that Guardians of the Galaxy: Mission: Breakout! would take the place of The Twilight Zone Tower of Terror. I was heartbroken. Here was something I had spent 12 years of my life involved with suddenly dying in front of me.

The reason it hurt so much is difficult to pin down entirely. Looking back, I struggled greatly with depression and continue to do so to this very day. I was teased and bullied in school and there wasn’t much of a way for me to escape. My home life was okay, but fighting between my parents and the affects of what caused those fights strained the household. Disneyland was my sanctuary, and Tower, to me, was my escape. I could be someone else with Tower. It gave me confidence and it inspired me. On nights where I might have been struggling, where my mind drifted to thoughts of suicide, I spent them at a computer, designing and building, and connecting with the Tower fan community. I made friends due to the shared passion for something that is as simple as a ride at a theme park. While my depression never healed, I was able to fight it back through this passion. As time pushed forward, I lost connection with a lot of these Tower fan communities. Many faded away or died as time marched on. I lost connection with the friends I had made and struggled to maintain my happiness. When I was forced out of high school, I spent a lot of nights with these fan communities, and suddenly they were gone. I held onto the memories of the conversations had and the stories shared and still kept returning to the parks with hopes of finding new friends and people that could be a part of a Tower of Terror family. When I worked there, I wanted nothing more than to be a part of the Tower, but my diagnosis of fibromyalgia and the worsening of it made that impossible. With the announcement it felt as if my heart was ripped apart. Everything from the past 12 years shattered instantly. I know I have the memories of this attraction and the joy and happiness it brought, but with me it’s not the same. Those memories are sad now, reflections of a history and point in time where there was an escape for me. It sounds stupid, even to me, but Tower was more to me than just a ride. Everything about me was connected to it. I built my life on that ride. My education and major was directly inspired by the ride. I wanted to one day craft something unique and amazing. Something that would inspire another the same way I was inspired way back in 2004. The change of this ride also spoke to the climate inside Disney. The corporate meddling and orders from higher ups that have no reflection on the guest satisfaction but instead on the easiest way to sell things now and to forget the long term. It hurt to see a company so good a hiding their corporate side suddenly flashing it for all the world to see. Their reckless disregard for the masses of fans and for the terrible show caused by this change is unforgivable. The Tower died in September, 2016, when the sign was pulled off unceremoniously. Ever since it has been on life support, being kept barely breathing as they slowly strip away what made it unique.

Some of you might say that there is still Walt Disney World’s Tower (and Paris’), but that isn’t the point. To me, DCA’s was the Tower of Terror, original or not. It fit the world crafted in that park. It told it’s story perfectly and dragged you into the hallowed halls that once held lavish parties. It was my definitive version.

On January 1st, I attended the 13th Hour party. There I met two wonderful Tower fans and celebrated this attraction in a way no other attraction could ever be celebrated. Disney did a great job on a party that should never have happened in the first place. That night, on our final elevator’s return, our bellhop greeted us crying. That’s when I noticed that every bellhop had been struggling to choke through the spiels. It sunk in. I felt the shockwave of this loss throughout yesterday and struggled till the very end to maintain myself. In the end it was too much. As I sit here writing this, I find tears streaming down my face.

For me, my year ended last night. 2016 has frequently been personified as this taker of life, this year of the reminder of our own mortality. We did lose many great people in such a short time, and while that can be explained by the years from which these greats were born, it doesn’t change the fact that we desire someone or something to blame. 2016, for me, took one last life. It took something I found sacred and tore it away.

Walt Disney said that “Disneyland would never be completed as long as there is imagination left in the world.” This isn’t a justification for the change of something loved and enjoyed, but a reflection on the shifts of guest’s desires and wants. A story goes that Walt overheard a child wish to ride Jungle Cruise only for the mother to refuse, stating that they “rode it last time” and “didn’t need to this time.” Walt was mortified. He went about shifting what the ride’s purpose was, giving the skippers freedom to spiel in a way they felt fit. Jokes and comedy became the ride’s signature and to this day is beloved by many. He didn’t rip it out because it was stale, nor did he retheme it. It was still an adventure through a jungle, but instead of a serious documentary tone, it took on a dark foreboding joking aesthetic. Tower was loved, and the massive lines and 300% merchandise sale increase proves that guests still wanted it. The change for change’s sake should only ever be done for the betterment and improvement of something. Guardians, especially to me, is no improvement, and does neither Tower, nor Guardians justice.

Today I struggle to push forward. My future feels shaky and distorted. I am uncertain of where I am to go next and while I will continue to try, the desire to just lay down and give up is very strong. So with this I say goodbye to The Hollywood Tower Hotel and the The Twilight Zone Tower of Terror. I hope, as Vera Lynn sang, “we’ll meet again. Don’t know where, don’t know when. But I know we’ll meet again some sunny day.”

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The 6 Most WTF Hollywood Depictions Of Donald Trump

Before he became the inciting incident in the post-apocalyptic thriller that is our age, Donald Trump spent most of his life cultivating the image of a disgustingly wealthy businessman and cameo-worthy celebrity. He was the rich bully of his time, inspiring many movies and TV shows to feature barely fictionalized versions of him as villainous characters meant to symbolize the greed and cynicism of 1980s capitalism. Interestingly, none of the following examples ever went so far as to imagine a future in which this character would become president.

6

A Trumpian New York City Developer Starts A Hate Campaign Against The Ninja Turtles

It was only a matter of time before the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles squared off against the most quintessential of all New York City foes: rising property values.

In the fourth season of the original Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles show, the Turtles are beleaguered by real estate magnate and rotund blowhard Fenton Q. Hackenbrush, who runs the not so subtly named Donald J. Lofty Enterprises. Hackenbrush wants to demolish the sewers completely and turn them into Donald J. Lofty luxury condos. For that, he needs the Turtles to disappear. (If Hackenbrush is anything like the real Trump, he probably thinks the Turtles are the wrong color to live in one of his buildings.)

In an interview with April O’Neil, Hackenbrush sells his greedy plans to the public on the basis that his sewer reconstruction will “flush out the worst menace in the city: the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles.” Of course, the people of New York don’t have any problems with the Turtles, so Hackenbrush forces a group of employees to dress up in those bad Turtle Halloween costumes we all used to wear and go commit crimes.

Then an evil turtle named Slash arrives in the city, and Hackenbrush immediately mocks him as “some kind of foreigner,” but then bribes him into sowing mayhem, fanning the flames of turtle racism.

Hackenbrush is eventually exposed by some ace reporting by O’Neil (New York Times, pay attention). As punishment, he is loudly fired by the actual owner of the company, Mr. Lofty — who looks surprisingly a lot like Fred Trump, Donald’s father. We’re not saying TMNT intentionally created a world in which Fred Trump would repeatedly yell “You’re fired” at his heir, but that’s immediately the best Trump origin story we’ve ever heard.

5

The Devil’s Advocate Features A Rich Murderer Who Owns Trump Tower

In The Devil’s Advocate, Al Pacino is the titular Devil (not a spoiler; you don’t cast Pacino in a movie about Satan and make him the lovable dad), who has set up a law firm in New York in order to subvert justice and release evil into society. And who is Satan’s favorite client? The guy who lives atop Trump Tower.

Though it is slightly inaccurate, since he never claims to have the best murders ever, just fantastic.

Alexander Cullen, played by a suitably balding Craig T. Nelson, is a Trump-esque real estate mogul accused of murdering his wife, stepson, and maid — dire straits for a guy based on someone who once bragged he could shoot a person in the middle of the street and get away with it. His arrest immediately prompts Pacino’s law firm of Fire, Brimstone & Ham to send their new ace attorney, Kevin Lomax (Keanu Reeves wearing his dad’s suit), to defend Cullen. Why? Because, oddly, he’s Lucifer’s best client, having racked up “16,242” billable hours in one year. That’s a lot of shady business.

Warner Bros. Pictures 1.85 years of shady business, to be exact.

But being a hated New York business tycoon and employing a massive team of evil lawyers doesn’t necessarily mean Cullen is a Trump clone, right? Luckily, for the sake of subtlety, when we finally arrive at Cullen’s home, we see that it’s literally Trump’s apartment in Trump Tower. The filmmakers managed to rent it out, preserving its natural appearance as Liberace’s mind palace.

Warner Bros. Pictures

Warner Bros. Pictures “Try not to touch anything — you’ll get metal poisoning.”

In the end, Cullen is found not guilty, despite Lomax knowing that he murdered those people, thereby finally giving in to his true nature as the son of Satan. That’s right, the Devil’s son loses his innocence by defending Trump. Burn.

4

A Sci-Fi TV Show Villain Morphs Into Donald Trump … Played By Donald Trump

Night Man was a late ’90s low-budget TV show based on the Malibu Comics series about a San Franciscan saxophone player who can sense evil and wears a laser eye. Despite that, it somehow managed to run for two seasons, possibly because of its reliance on magnificently bizarre cameos — none of which were more utterly mystifying than Donald J. Trump in technically the only real acting credit to his name.

In this episode, Night Man is chasing a face-changing villain called Face to Face, who decides to engage in some quick identity theft to make a large withdrawal from the bank. Who better to transform into than the self-proclaimed richest man in the universe, Donald Trump? (No really, please suggest someone better.) In one of the most perfect sequences in the history of the medium, Face to Face slowly morphs into The Donald, dazzling audiences with peak mid ’90s CGI while simultaneously reinforcing the idea that Trumps looks like a melting Claire Danes.

Donald Trump — remember, this is the real Donald Trump playing a man who has shapeshifted into Donald Trump — walks into a delightfully green-screened bank, and then sits down with the bank manager to illegally withdraw $10,000. Sadly, the nuanced layers of a real man pretending to be a fake man pretending to be him do not translate to Trump’s performance:

Could they not find a real bank that would allow Trump to walk in?

Weirdly, in his utter boredom and bad acting, something spectacular happens: Trump seems … nice. He’s subdued, polite, even charming. It seems that all you need to do to make Trump likable is carefully control what he says and make sure he’s not physically in the same room with any human beings.

3

A Disney Show Paired Donald Trump With A Dead Pirate

Before Disney found a way to become rich off Johnny Depp wearing a lot of eyeliner, it first got its pirate feet wet with The 100 Lives Of Black Jack Savage, a lighthearted romp wherein the undead spirit of a mass murderer teams up with a fictional Donald Trump analogue to save both of their souls from burning forever in hell.

Luckily, Disney would never reuse “Jack Savage,” or his ship the Black Bird, or anything like it ever again.

When Daniel Tarberry, a rich real estate mogul from New York, has to flee the country because of legal troubles, he buys a luxurious Caribbean mansion to lie low in, but doing so summons the ghost of Black Jack Savage, who was hanged on the island for his crimes. The two are now forced to save the lives of 100 people in order to save themselves from eternal damnation.

Tarberry is a greedy shark who insists on hanging a portrait of himself in every hotel room he owns and constantly tries to weasel out of paying his contractors a dime. He’s not very respectful to women, referring to every lady who talks back to him as “the poster girl for PMS.” He’s also a straight up racist, first assuming Black Jack is his cabin boy, then loudly exclaiming that he wants to change all the locks because he “found a black man in my kitchen.”

The writers had intended to start Tarberry off as a real piece of Trump, only to eventually learn from his mistakes and become a better man. He even occasionally refrains from treating Black Jack like some weird Jim Crow genie.

But the show never got to the redemption part, as the network pulled it after only seven poorly rated episodes. Believing that people are interested in seeing a Trump redemption story might have been the most misjudged part of The 100 Lives Of Black Jack Savage — a Disney show that opens with a black man being lynched.

2

Gremlins 2 Had Trump Fight Gremlins

Nobody really expected Gremlins to get a sequel, especially not its creators. And when it did, no one could have predicted that the real villain wouldn’t be gremlins, but the world’s most notorious New York City mogul.

Director Joe Dante wanted to have the Gremlins run amok in a fancy New York skyscraper. But the movie still needed a villain, a rich guy so obnoxious that audiences wouldn’t feel bad about watching midnight demons tear him several new assholes. And then it hit Dante: “At that time in New York City, there was one major character who was Mr. Billion.”

At the time, Trump was known for being “overbearing and obviously kind of goofy,” said the film’s writer, Charles S. Haas. “He was an emblem of what was going on in the ’80s and ’90s with greed and money and crassness, and [the idea of] the whole world being for sale.” And so they created powerful millionaire Daniel Clamp, a Trumpian mogul (with a dash of Ted Turner) who also happens to be running violent animal experiments in his tower Clamp Center.

Actor John Glover modeled his performance of Clamp on the director, whom he saw as “incredibly gentle, supporting and encouraging,” rather than on Trump, which is why Clamp can say weirdly racist nonsense like “Let’s lose the elm trees. People see elm, they think Dutch. [pause] Disease” and still sound like a swell boss. It’s also why we unreservedly root for Clamp when he shoves a Gremlin into a paper shredder.

And also because he seems to be the only one who realizes gremlins aren’t that difficult to kill.

Consequently, Gremlins 2: The New Batch offers a peek at an alternate universe in which Nice Trump helps us fight small-minded rage goblins, as opposed to the universe we live in, where those goblins got him elected president.

1

Sesame Street Thinks Donald Trump Is Garbage

Over its nearly 50-year history, Sesame Street has striven to be not just entertainment, but also a tool to teach children. And many times over, it has tried to teach them that Donald Trump is the king of the trash people.

The first time we encounter Sesame‘s Trump is in ’88, as a grouch named Ronald Grump. Grump is trying to con fellow grouch Oscar into letting him build a three-trash-can-high Grump Tower on his spot in return for a “duplex can-dominium.” Oscar simply adores Grump at first, because he exemplifies grouch values, as “his name is on every piece of trash in town.” Grump is also grouch-famous for building “a swamp in a day,” a line so apt that the Sesame Street writers should get a retroactive Emmy for it.

“What about dumpsters?”

However, Grump immediately tries to evict Oscar for keeping pets in his fantastic, just the best tower. This forces all the Sesame Street residents to band together to buy Grump off with their garbage, making the first lesson most American kids learned about Donald Trump was that they need to pay him to go away before he ruins everything.

Donald Grump returns during the show’s 2005 parody of The Apprentice, in which lesser grouches are fighting for the privilege to assist Grump in peddling his trash all across town. After a series of pointless tasks, Elmo, whose hard work and positive attitude wins the day, immediately gets fired by Grump, who exclaims, “I can’t have a good helper! I got my reputation to think of.”

However, the Trump animosity really boiled over during the Street‘s 25th anniversary show in 1993. The entire special episode revolves around the residents of Sesame Street fighting Grump (this time expertly portrayed by human forehead vein Joe Pesci), who’s trying to convert the entire block into a garish Grump Tower. At first he sweetly attempts to convince them that having their street become an overpriced boutique is a good thing. But when the residents don’t agree, Grump starts threatening Muppets like they’re in Goodfellas.

Fortunately, Grump’s plans fall apart because Oscar and his trash heap (which are on city property) keep Grump from selling a single condo. Furious, he rips up his plans and screams that Sesame Street didn’t deserve a Grump Tower anyway. So that’s charm, bully, and now abandonment. If the show had ended with Grump taking Oscar to court for loss of potential revenue, Sesame Street would have achieved the quadfecta of the Trump negotiation style long before Nancy Pelosi coined it.

Since he became president, Trump has not been shy about his desire to gut PBS, the public station that was home to Sesame Street until 2016. We can’t help but think that Ronald Grump has something to do with that.

Cedric will never stop politicizing Muppets. The best way to boycott his leftist agenda is by following him on Twitter but then never interacting with him in any shape or form. That’ll show him.

Why should you have to deal with the Trump presidency alone? Make your cats miserable too with this Donald Trump cat costume.

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