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thevexinator · 6 months ago

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DrDT cat au!

An alternate universe where your favorites are cats! You own a cate café! How do you manage?

warning [srs]: implied animal abuse, drdt spoilers for ch1/2(?)

warning [silly]: fluffy and goofy cats being themselves, maybe ooc?

♡ Ace Markey [Nyace]

♡ Was originally a barn cat meant to hunt mice, but his original owners found he was too skittish for the job, so he was handed to you. Needless to say, receiving that scraggly, orange ball of fluff was definitely among the best moments in your life.

♡ The core definition of what an orange cat is. Not a single thought in his head. From hissing at random objects to hissing at other cats, Nyace is definitely a handful. He picks fights with cats that can definitely carry him by the scruff, like Meowvi, Xanmeow and occasionally Nyaruko if he feels like trying his chances. He'll pick fights with everyone and everything. Including himself.

♡ Whenever he wants your attention, he'll come over and make sure you know he exists by throwing himself onto your back, lap, spleen, or hands. He wants attention, and he wants it neow. Enjoys ear scritches. He'll always hide when guests come over.

♡ When he's not needlessly aggressive, he's deliberately leaving orange hair all over your bedsheets. You can't get mad at him though, he's just silly. He's more of an indoor cat.

♡ That said, he'll proudly trot up to you with a toy mouse as if he actually hunted down a real one. You can't help but find it extremely cute.

♡ Arei Nageishi [Nyarei]

♡ She was removed from her original owners and rightfully so. You adopted a teeny tiny lynx-point siamese that was practically trembling in your hands when you brought her home.

♡ A sassy little princess. Will playfully bap other cats on the head. Whenever she does start something, she immediately runs to you for protection. She's also very protective of you. If it's her turn for you attention, she will make sure the other cats know that.

♡ She's besties with Meowden and J, but hates Nyarturo with a burning passion. Every time he walks by, she baps him in the head. She seems pretty chill with the other cats, baping them playfully.

♡ Nyarei will always be your side, lying on some part of your body or being in the same room. Whenever guests are over, she'll come over to say hello before going off to mind her own business.

♡ Whenever you're sad, Nyarei will come over and lie on you, purring to help you feel better. You're her favorite hooman. <3

♡ Arturo Giles [Nyarturo]

♡ Your friend came over one day and asked if you could look after this small, white somali cat they found wandering around. You took him in, wondering what could've happened for him to just wander the streets.

♡ He's a very hostile little thing. He'll judge other cats, but he seems pretty chill with Vermeow and Meowvi, even a bit nicer to Nyanco. He has beef with Nyarei, since he bullied Meowden once and got scratched by her bodyguard.

♡ He's very picky with petting. He'll only let you pet him. Behind the ears, under the chin and around the neck are where he'll allow pets. He's a bit iffy about back, but paws and belly are a no go.

♡ His owner, rather tragically, passed away. He's very attached to you for giving him the love he lacked. When he wants attention, he'll quietly come over, sit on your lap, and start to purr.

♡ He isn't fond of guests, opting to just be with the other cats and not the people who come over. He's also very well kept, cleaning himself often.

♡ Charles Cuevas [Charmeow]

♡ One day, you adopted a small kitty with an attitude problem. At first, he was just a sassy little snowshoe, but you eventually found he was rather loving.

♡ He's a pretty calm one. He's more for sitting in the sun and hanging with you. Occasionally, he gets up to shenanigans with Meowhit and Nyaruko. Even though Nyaruko attacked him, he didn't stop hanging out with her. By hanging out, I mean they just sit in the sun together or judge Davmeow. He just ignores Nyarei whenever she provokes him.

♡ He doesn't mind being touched by you, but he'll politely push others' hands away with his paw. A polite no. In private, he's a little snugglebug, even with Meowhit and Nyaruko. He cleans himself often, even allowing his two cat besties to do it.

♡ Charmeow has a cactus plushie he really likes to snuggle with. Every time he wants attention, he'll bring his cactus plush with him to snuggle while with you. He's actually a very neat cat, trying not to leave cat hair all over your clothes. When he does, he feels real bad about it.

♡ Every time you cook, he jumps onto the counter to watch. He just sits there, watching you cook. Sometimes he'll even pass you utensils. What a talented young man.

♡ David Chiem [Davmeow]

♡ You thought you adopted a starry-eyed, polite and sweet russian blue. A month later, you realize he's actually a little twat. Do you love him any less? No.

♡ Davmeow is very polite when guests come over. When they leave, he goes back to being a meanie. He seems to have feuds with Charmeow and Nyaruko. He isn't above bullying everyone, even you. He bites and scratches during his zoomies.

♡ He hits everyone in passing. Nyaruko is the only one who hits him back with no hesitation. Most of the other cats just look at him or hiss.

♡ Strangely enough, Davmeow seems to be in a somewhat passive relationship with Min. While he does occasionally bap her in the face, sometimes he'll loaf and birdwatch with her. He loves Xanmeow the most.

♡ Whenever he wants your attention, he will walk into the room and scream until you pet him on the head. Average cat activities.

♡ Eden Tobisa [Meowden]

♡ The silliest munchkin cat to breathe. Very friendly, you adopted her when your friend's cat had a litter of kittens and offered you one to take care of.

♡ Very fond of all the cats in the house... except Nyarturo. He bullies her a lot. Nyarei beats him up for it. Nyaruko seems to tolerate her, Nyanco seems to enjoy having her around, and all of the cats like Meowden save for the exception.

♡ Very energetic. For a cat of her tiny size, she enjoys running around and playing. In particular, she enjoys playfighting with Meowvi, despite him being a much larger cat. Her other daily activities include sunbathing, hanging with her besties, and napping.

♡ Second most prone to zoomies out of the girl cats. You have tripped on her multiple times.

♡ Hu Jing [PawJing]

♡ A very pretty bengal kitty, PawJing often helps you with house chores. One day, she followed you home and wouldn't stop meowing until you picked her up.

♡ She's very sweet around Nyanco, but she's very much sensitive around the other cats. She hisses at Nyace a lot, which is why they're kept at a distance. Her days are usually spent following you around. She has the sweetest meow of all the cats.

♡ If she senses something is wrong, she'll prance over with a blanket. She will literally not leave your side until you feel better.

♡ She's generally very sweet with guests. Next to Meowden wins "Nice Cat of The Week" many times in a row. As mentioned before, she'll often help you around with chores by carrying things and leaving them where you do.

♡ J Rosales [J]

♡ A generally pissy and tomboyish burmese. You found this one when opening up shop one day. Not sure how she got in. You just found her.

♡ Outside of actually trying to kill Nyarturo, her days are largely spent hanging around her cat buddies. Her favorite activity involves messing with the light switch.

♡ Generally okay with guests? Depends on the day, and if she's had her breakfast yet.

♡ Most of her days are spent being a normal cat, surprising as that may be. She'll rub up on your legs or loaf in your lap, pretty much the most normal cat of the litter.

♡ Levi Fontana [Meowvi]

♡ You saw a cat, covered in blood, limping down the street near the café. Concerned, you brought the [at the time] tiny maine coon to the vet for a checkup. With no chip or collar, you were allowed to keep him.

♡ He's a pretty sweet cat. Sure, he's very large and sheds like crazy, but that's just extra storage for all the love he has in him. He'll carry Meowden around, confusing her for a kitten. He also does that to Nyace, although results are very different.

♡ Much like PawJing, he'll help you with chores around the café. He's surprisingly intelligent, carrying utensils to their designated spots with no issue.

♡ When it comes to guests, he's actually quite shy. He'll come up and say hello, but he's usually hiding somewhere if a lot of people are coming in.

♡ Min Jeung [Min]

♡ It was the scenario of finding a cat inside a box with "please adopt me" written on it in sharpie in the rain. The little cornish rex came home with you and has been there ever since.

♡ Very shy. She skids when guests come over, and she'll only come out when it's a slow day or when the café is empty. She likes a few of the regulars, though.

♡ Despite looking like a very boring cat, she's insanely intelligent. She has figured out the tricks and you cannot deceive her into going to the vet.

♡ She's very attached to you specifically. She'll follow you around or sit on your shoulders, purring whenever you scratch her head. Most people confuse her for a stuffed animal at times.

♡ Nico Hakobyan [Nyanco]

♡ ... You're not entirely sure what they are. They're definitely a breed of short-haired cat, likely a scottish fold and british shorthair mix. They were the first ever cat you adopted into your care.

♡ Somehow, they're more shy than Min. Does not come out whenever the café is open. Exclusively hang out with PawJing, Purrose, and still prefer solitude.

♡ Really attached to you. Unbelievably clingy. While cats like Min, Meowhit, and occasionally Charmeow and the others can get clingy, none are as clingy as Nyanco. Will literally cling to you and never let go.

♡ Has a favorite mouse toy they bring with them everywhere. They will literally never go anywhere without one.

♡ Rose Lacroix [Purrose]

♡ A very sleepy tortie cat. You originally assumed she had died on the side of the street, only to find out that she was just asleep.

♡ As mentioned before, her hobby is sleeping. She is almost never awake. While she does seem to have some kind of kitty circle with Nyaruko, Meowden, and Min, she's usually sleeping through most of the day.

♡ When she is awake, she's usually pretty inactive. Never experiences zoomies and usually lies around whenever.

♡ Her favorite napping spot just happens to be your lap.

♡ Teruko Tawaki [Nyaruko]

♡ One day, while taking out the trash, you found this poor baby in the dumpster. The trip to the vet was definitely a fight, and it took her a while to get used to you... in the end, you're still the only human she trusts.

♡ On day one, she was pretty hostile to the others, even through the door meeting phase. Gradually, she warmed up to Charmeow and Meowhit. She began following them around and never left their sides until she was independent enough to hang out with the rest.

♡ She's distrusting of guests. At first, she would hide when they came over. Once she got a little more used to it, she would generally just sit in their vicinity, maybe come closer if she got curious.

♡ If you give her enough time, she'll come to you. She likes to nestle against you, as she finds you to be a source of safety. She couldn't be more grateful.

♡ Veronika Grebenshchikova [Vermeow]

♡ A strange calico you found in the café one day. No clue where she came from. She just appeared one day.

♡ She's definitely joyous and filled with whimsy. Very popular among guests for how silly she is!!

♡ When she's not bothering Nyarturo, she's causing general mischief around the café. Shenanigans that not even Nyarei gets up to. She'll look you dead in the eyes and reach for an electrical socket.

♡ She's very aggressive when playing. Of course, she doesn't cause any physical harm, but she gets rough sometimes. Somehow, more orange than Nyace.

♡ ... she's the one bringing dead mice to your doorstep.

♡ Whit Young [Meowhit]

♡ The charming turkish angora. Endearingly dubbed "vanilla custard" by guests, Meowhit is a very friendly cat!

♡ He loves to follow Charmeow and Nyaruko around. It's basically his hobby outside of cutesing his way out of trouble. He gets up to trouble with Nyarei.

♡ Strangely enough, he'll never let you go into the bathroom alone. He'll meow obnoxiously until you let him inside. Even then, he'll just sit on the sink and stare at you. You're not sure why... it's pretty worrying.

♡ He has a heart on his back. It would be a crime to miss this detail.

♡ Xander Matthews [Xanmeow]

♡ British shorthair with a missing eye. He was left at a shelter after he was abandoned. You have taken him in, and he's the most loving little creature ever.

♡ He's very hyper. He can run around endlessly and not get tired. Among Vermeow, Nyace and himself, he's somehow the most orange one of them. He is every single orange cat video to exist at the same time.

♡ So loud. He meows very loud without meaning to. Nyaruko hisses at him every time he does. The poor boy knows no rest. </3

♡ He's the one keeping everyone else in line. If they misbehave, she scruffs them and drags them into the corner for time out.

#danganronpa despair time #drdt #ace markey #arei nageishi #arturo giles #charles cuevas #david cheim #eden tobisa #hu jing #j rosales #levi fontana #min jeung #nico hakobyan #rose lacroix #teruko tawaki #veronika grebenshchikova #whit young #xander matthews #vexs usual yapping

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thunder-opossum · 4 months ago

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Inv being goofy and a silly (bonus points if they THINK they are alone)

Bap

#asks #rain world #my art #slugcat #doodles #rw enot #rw nightcat

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shadykazama · 6 months ago

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hii!! I wanted to ask if you still write for overwatch and if you do, could i request baptiste nsfw alphabet??? tyy

No, thank YOU whoever you are for requesting this!! I haven't done one of these in a hot minute and I honestly haven't been motivated much to write recently but I'll be DAMNED if I ignore a request for this angel. Bap needs love desperately, he's like easily top 3 hottest overwatch characters! Ugh 😩 anyway-

OW Baptiste NSFW alphabet~

A = Aftercare (what they’re like after sex)

�� He is a romantic through and through. Will pepper you with kisses and let you rest on his chest after he cleans up. And I do mean HE. Cause he won't be letting you do any of the work, you are his prince/princess!

B = Body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)

🧡 Loves your hips! Grabbing them to pull you into a hug- or grabbing them during much less innocent activities is 100% his go to.

🧡 He loves his arms! Listen, that man works out. He puts a lot of effort into being strong and looking good. Besides just being proud of his hard work, big arms means he can toss you over his shoulder or keep you safe. He also loves when you grab onto his arms while he's fucking you.

C = Cum (anything to do with cum, basically)

🧡 Unsurprisingly, his cum is thick and doesn't have too much flavor. He has a really good diet which affects how he tastes! I definitely headcanon him as having had a vasectomy; he's nowhere near ready to have a kid and is a responsible individual who knows he's able to lessen the risk. If you're not uncomfortable with it, he loves to cum inside of you- but if you'd prefer he didn't, he usually tries to pull out and cum in his hand so he doesn't make as much of a mess.

D = Dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

🧡 He's lowkey into exhibitionism and would love to fuck you in a public space, but he knows there's simply no way he'd actually be able to do it. At best, he may ask you to make a video with him for his eyes only.

E = Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they’re doing?)

🧡 He's a huge flirt and an ex-mercenary, I can definitely see him being experienced with both men and women. Regardless of how experienced you are, he's positively gentle with you the first time you guys have sex. He wants to get to know you, and your body, the best that he can.

🧡 If you're inexperienced, he'll go slow and gentle, and will talk you through it with words that will leave you blushing red like an apple.

🧡 If you ARE experienced, however, he'll shift his attention toward learning what you like as quickly as he can so he can give you the time of your life.

F = Favorite position (this goes without saying)

🧡 He loves fucking you in any position where you can easily grab his arms or he can easily grab your hips. He's a simple man~ I'd say missionary with your legs pinned up beside your head. Or- alternatively, holding you up against a wall.

G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.)

🧡 As romantic as he is, he's just as much of a flirt- and a playful one at that. It's rare that he's not cracking you up with terrible pick up lines or the corniest lovey dovey comments ever. He wants to see you smile and have fun with him!

H = Hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.)

🧡 He's very well trimmed, well kept, clean 🤌. He doesn't mind hair on his partner at all, but cleanliness is important to him!

I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect)

🧡 Oh gosh, this angel?? You'll never feel more loved than when he's got you held in his arms. You are his god given solace and heaven on earth to him. Between cheesy lines and overly sweet comments, he'll spit out some poetry every now and then that will have your heart melting as he makes a mess of you.

J = Jack off (masturbation headcanon)

🧡 I'd say he does it the normal amount, but more interestingly- he really likes mutual masturbation. Something about watching you touch yourself or vice versa is extremely hot to him and though you can't really tell, will leave him a blushing mess.

K = Kink (one or more of their kinks)

🧡 Fun is the most important part of sex to him, fun and intimacy. So what does a fun loving, flirtatious, sweetheart like? Well roleplay of course! It's as silly as it is sexy, and if that doesn't scream Baptiste I don't know what does.

🧡 Exhibitionism, to a small degree! It's his dirty secret.

🧡 Praise!!! He could make a sailor blush with that silver tongue of his. He will never leave you feeling unloved or unworshipped.

🧡 Marking. There's just something SO hot to him about you leaving marks on him. Claw up his back, his arms- leave your lipstick kisses all over him, give him hickeys!

L = Location (favorite places to do the do)

🧡 The bed is most preferable, since he likes to take his time, but if he's in more of a rush or just feeling frisky he'll take you on the kitchen counter~

M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)

🧡 Form. Fitting. Clothing. 🙌 Show yourself off! He thinks your body is perfect and will melt when you show off that confidence.

🧡 Dancing. He's a good dancer and would love to dance with you. Get a little bold and start putting on a show for him~

N = No (something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)

🧡 Will NOT do degradation or receive it. It's a huge turn off for him.

🧡 The furthest he'll go with hitting you is maybe playing around with some toys or spanking you to be cheeky, but I think any actual pain play would be a no for him.

O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)

🧡 This man LOVES getting his dick sucked. LOVES IT. And damn does he look good while he's receiving. He'll sit nice and good for you, one hand on your head, not pushing or putting pressure- just there ground himself. Leave bites or kiss marks on his thighs and he may cum right then and there!

🧡 He's skilled at giving as well, though I think he'd prefer receiving. That won't damper his enthusiasm to pleasure you though! He's more than happy to have you mewling underneath him.

P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)

🧡 Prefers to take it slow and have fun with it, but is very susceptible to begging. If you ask for more, he'll give you more. He's more than capable of ruining you. Likes to make corny doctor jokes afterwards though.

Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)

🧡 Prefers to take his time, but that's just because it's more fun to him. He's more than willing to drop everything and succumb to some carnal pleasure with you every now and then~

R = Risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.)

🧡 He'll try just about anything once as long as you ask. He makes it really clear too that he's open to any suggestions and won't judge you for them.

S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?)

🧡 He'll normally stop after one or two rounds depending on how tired you are, but he can push three if you really beg him. He'll never leave you unsatisfied though, regardless of how tired he may be.

T = Toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?)

🧡 Toys are his allies!! He'll never see them as competition. He doesn't own any to use on himself, aside from maybe a prop or two for his roleplay stuff, but any and all toys you bring to the relationship, he'd be more than happy to use on you.

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)

🧡 He's not too bad, he likes seeing you happy and pleasured more than anything, but every now and then he'll get a bit of a teasing attitude- usually when he's going down on you. There's just something about how cute you look and how in control he is that tickles that part of him that wants to make you whine and beg a little.

V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.)

🧡 He's extremely vocal, both in words and in moans. He'll be the loudest when you suck him off, since he's not worried too much about anything else but how you're making him feel. His moans aren't shy, they're very full and pretty.

W = Wild card (a random headcanon for the character)

🧡 He's a switch, leaning top. Even when he's on bottom I see him more as a power bottom than anything.

🧡 Thinks it's hot when you ride him, but can't help himself and always helps you out, grabbing your hips and thrusting up in time with your movements.

🧡 His inner thighs are pretty sensitive and a good way to get him squirming.

X = X-ray (let’s see what’s going on under those clothes)

🧡 Big. I will not apologize to anyone, this man is PACKING. Easily nine inches if not more. He's circumcised and around average thickness for his size. He's a shower not a grower.

Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?)

🧡 Average if anything. He's a huge flirt, but he's also a busy guy- he's got a fairly normal libido and a good amount of self control. Getting him riled up enough to make him lose control is tough, especially since when you start, he'll tease you right back!

Z = Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)

🧡 Not a big napper, and is used to not getting much sleep, so I'd say you're more likely to fall asleep before him. But if you don't, he likes watching TV before bed and will let you pick what you guys watch.

Thanks so much again for the request, Bap is such an angel!

Have kitty Bap for making it to the end! <3

#Overwatch Baptiste #overwatch x reader #baptiste x reader #baptiste x reader headcanons #jean baptiste augustin #baptiste x reader smut #minors dni #overwatch 2 #headcanons

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destinygoldenstar · 5 days ago

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🌟Jake Is This Season's MVP And I Want To Strangle Him🌟 - Total Drama Viewer Reacts to Disventure Camp Season 3 Episode 10 “All's Fair In Love And Paintball”

I wanted to do Gabby angst.

But every goddamn time, my PC is like "Lol Nope".

I have an old PC, you guys have no idea. I haven't upgraded in like, seven years. I'm not somebody who upgrades my electronics until the ones I have are like, completely unusable and broken.

But I am all for this side of Gabby. She is taking the villain role so cartoonishly and I love it.

Makes sense it would be her that's like that too. Because she's NOT actually evil. She's just playing the role for herself and Ellie's sake.

I feel like Ellie would be so proud of her.

I hope Gabby like, contracts a scheme to blindside Yul when it's convenient. I would stan the hell out of that.

We're ALMOST HALFWAY actually.

So my guess is that the next episode is the merge. With nine people. Or the episode after that with eight. This is the last team episode.

Which in that case, the ONLY character I can see that is being eliminated this episode is Jake.

Like, his story is wrapping up. He's expressed wanting to be better. Tom is wanting to take accountability. Everyone hates him.

So I am 99% CERTAIN that this is the episode where we lose my boy.

I'm not ready. 😢

The merge is gonna be the Jello members, Tom, Aiden, Ashley, and Allyson. Which in that case either Gabby will flip back OR the non-villains find an idol.

"You know, except for Grett, who really needs better taste in men."

FACTS.

THANK YOU.

WHY IS YUL STILL HERE?!?!

HE HAS OFFICIALLY STAYED TWICE AS LONG AS HE DID LAST SESASON.

This is a hate crime directed at me.

I DON'T CARE IF IT MAKES SENSE BECAUSE HE'S IN A STRONG ALLIANCE. I STILL WANT HIM GONE EVEN IF YOU HAVE TO BULLSHIT IT.

"In the end, Ashley led Team Magenta to victory."

OH SHE GOT IT!

OKAY ALLYSON! SLAYING IT!

EXCUSE ME. THAT WASN'T ASHLEY.

ALLYSON WAS THE ONE WHO WON IT FOR THEM.

Krystal is a LIAR.

JUST BECAUSE I'VE BEEN OUT FOR DAYS DOESN'T MEAN I FORGOT THAT!!!

OH MY GOD IT IS MERGE!

HOLY SHIT, I THOUGHT IT WAS NEXT EPISODE.

Okay, uh... does that change my predictions at all???

No, I'm still going with Jake. These guys can just band together in mutual hatred towards Jake.

He would be a good one to keep around for the Jellos since he's his own drama source...

No. Jake. He's gone.

Good to know Oliver is alive though. Don't know how he survived getting shoved out of a plane though.

"I feel really awful for Tess."

Are they mocking Gabby? SHE IS RIGHT THERE.

They outcasted her to the other side of the firepit!

"She only came here to spend time with Ally and Hunter, yet she never got to be with either of them."

She got like, one conversation with each.

And Hunter is at the hotel with her. Or wherever they're staying. She's spending time with one of them right now.

"Hey, she messed with my Ellie! Sorry Tess, that's what happens when you remove my buddy."

Gabby really said "AND I'D DO IT AGAIN! BAP BAP! AND I'D DO IT AGAIN! BAP BAP BAP!!"

"So the grudge is still there with me and Tom."

"Yeah! No shit Sherlock!"

"You realize it's two against one? If we lose again, you're going home."

Who's gonna tell him?

"It just so happens this morning, I found an immunity totem!"

Oh wait, did you really?!

Damn, even Ellie's own girlfriend is better at this than her.

Riya helped her. That's my headcanon till proven wrong.

"Yeah I gave the newbie villain a few tips on this matter. My next showing is including her after all, and I want her to be at her A Game."

"Seriously? Again?"

OH YEAH SHE FOUND ONE IN SEASON ONE TOO.

No she doesn't need Riya's help. She can stand on her own.

SHE'S REALLY CAMPING IT UP.

I love this for her. I love how NOT seriously she's taking the 'evil' thing.

MORE OF THIS, PLEASE.

"Sorry, was that goofy? I want to be evil, but I need practice."

You're doing amazing, sweetie.

"Y-you could've fooled me."

Tom ^

"Whenever I'm in a tight spot, I always think: What would Ellie do?"

NOT THIS. I would tell you that right now.

"I knew that if I lied that I have an immunity totem, Aiden and Tom would shit bricks!"

Oh she lied. Okay.

She's just fucking with them. Shitting bricks though XD

"Thanks Ellie! Miss you babe."

Awww ❤️

Ellie's like "Wow. My girlfriend is a lot better at this than me."

What berries are those?

Allyson I hope you know what you're doing.

These are either blueberries and they're hoarding them for herself, OR they're poisonous and she's giving them to Jake.

"I don't know about this, Ashley."

Oh no XD

"For the love of god man, you have to eat something. You didn't eat the apples two days ago. You didn't eat any fish yesterday. You're gonna eat these berries and you're gonna like them!"

"But I don't like blueberries-"

"SHUT IT AND EAT."

"Oh come on, you agreed to it."

Is this about apologizing to Allyson? I hope it is.

But also I made a joke about this in my April Fools post so I'm scared.

Allyson. Fingers crossed. Do not fuck this up. Take it and leave.

HE LOOKS SCARED.

"Jake has something to say. Go ahead, Jake."

I mean he AGREED to this, so that means he WANTS to do this.

He never came across as if he wanted to hurt Allyson. He was just not in the mood for her company.

"I hate blueberries so I don't care what you do for me. I'd rather starve. Thank you. That's all I had to say. Bye."

"I'm sorry."

😂

OH MY GOD ARE YOU KIDDING ME?!?! 😂

THAT WAS SO BAD! 😂

Jake being a terrible apologist. Kinda based though. I can see that being in character for him.

"Sowwy I don't like your food, Allyson. Can we be fwiends?" ��👈

I think he means it, I just think he's really bad at it XD

"I'm sorry Ally. Okay? There."

Okay no he doesn't mean it. Nevermind.

She's like "Is this bitch for real?"

"But I'm SOWWY!"

"I'm sorry I've been difficult. I was jealous that you and Ashley were getting along, and it made me misbehave and say some rude things to you."

Does he mean this or no?

You know what, even if he doesn't mean it, at least he's TRYING to clear the air and clear up the drama. That's still a good step in fixing things.

At least he's making it clear he does NOT want this drama to keep going. Even if he's a shit apologist, that's still good maturity.

And he acknowledged HE'S the problem person here, too.

I'm proud, Jake. 👍

"Now, Ally, do you have anything to say to Jake?"

Oh god.

"Well fuck you! These blueberries weren't for you anyway! STARVE, BITCH!"

Sorry, sorry, I had to.

MAKE OR BREAK MOMENT HERE.

ALLYSON, YOU CAN DO TWO THINGS HERE.

REJECT THIS, SCREAM AT HIM, KEEP UP THE DRAMA, AND RUIN YOUR GAME BECAUSE OF YOUR STUPID GRUDGE OVER THE IPAD.

OR, JUST TAKE IT RIGHT HERE AND WORK WITH HIM TO KEEP YOURSELF SAFE AND AVOID DANGER.

HELL YOU DON'T EVEN HAVE TO LIKE HIM OR BUY IT.

"I don't forgive you. BUT, for the sake of MY game, I will tolerate your existence and work with you. Deal?"

THIS IS A MASSIVE MAKE OR BREAK MOMENT FOR ALLYSON HERE.

WHAT WILL YOU CHOOSE???

"Guess it's better late than never."

"Really? I muster up the courage to admit my wrongs, and that's how you answer?"

AND IT'S BROKEN.

GODDAMMIT ALLY!!!

I don't... I DON'T UNDERSTAND.

WHY?!??!?!? WHY DO YOU WANT TO KEEP THIS UP?!?!?

THIS RUINS YOUR OWN GAME! IF YOU DON'T WORK WITH JAKE, YOU'RE FUCKED!! YOU GOT NO ONE ELSE!!!

THIS ISN'T ABOUT FORGIVING HIM OR LIKING HIM. YOU GOTTA THINK ABOUT YOUR GAME!!!

Some people suck. I know. But you have to work with shitty people to get your way sometimes. Anyone in the work industry knows this.

IF YOU PISS THEM OFF, YOU HURT YOURSELF MORE THAN YOU HURT THEM.

I can totally see Jake responding like this because he's Jake and it's been established multiple times he does NOT have this maturity to be the bigger person here.

"So Golden, you're just being sexist cause Allyson wasn't established to have this understanding either."

YES. SHE HAS. ACTUALLY.

Season Two Allyson would be very mature about this and be the bigger person, regardless of her feelings towards the person.

She worked with YUL. Just fine.

She was paranoid about Tess stealing her man. But she STILL put in the effort to work with her so they both didn't die in the woods.

THIS SEASON TOO. She was willing to work with FIORE. Who has done SO MUCH WORSE than Jake has! She didn't like Fiore, but she was willing to work with her because she knew it would benefit her game. And when Hunter refused, she was the bigger person in that situation and told him off.

SO YES. ALLYSON IS ABSOLUTELY CAPABLE OF BEING THE BIGGER PERSON HERE AND SUCKING IT UP. BY THE SHOW'S OWN CHARACTERIZATION.

SO WHY THE FUCK IS IT DIFFERENT NOW?!

HE BROKE AN IPAD AND HE DOESN'T WANT TO EAT. THAT'S IT. COMPARE THAT TO THE WORSE PEOPLE YOU'VE WORKED WITH JUST FINE!

I'm very pissed. I'm genuinely pissed.

I CALLED THIS OUT IN MY APRIL FOOLS POST TOO. CAUSE I THOUGHT THAT WOULDN'T HAPPEN.

"Nah bro I see right through your bullshit. You broke my iPad and you refuse to eat. Therefore, you are a completely irredeemable dipshit and nothing you ever do will ever make me work with you! What? Sucking up my feelings and working with you to better my own position in the game is the better option for me? Fuck that! I'm THAT petty!"

I don't hate Allyson. YET. VERY STRONG EMPHASIS ON YET.

But I'm really not liking her writing so far.

"You know what I'm trying to stay positive, but this bitch is getting on my nerves."

"Actions speak louder than words. I won't believe you changed till I see it."

She's right here. Okay? I'm giving her credit.

And FINE. IF YOU FEEL THAT WAY, FINE. THAT'S FINE.

BUT YOU BEING A PRICK IS GONNA FIX NOTHING.

"Well you being a prick isn't any help."

YEAH. HE'S JUST SAYING FACTS. I AGREE.

"What did you call me?!"

WE COULD'VE HAD THIS GO SO SMOOTH AND YOU BLEW IT.

NOW YOU'RE OFFENDED?!

"Ally, what was that? We were doing so good!"

"Ashley, how do you expect me to forgive and forget if Jake has never shown any respect to me?"

RESPECT? THAT'S WHAT THIS IS ABOUT NOW?! RESPECT?!?!

HE RESPECTED YOU ENOUGH TO WORK WITH YOU DURING BOTH PREVIOUS CHALLENGES. EVEN WITH THE IPAD SETBACK.

JUST BECAUSE HE DOESN'T WANT A MEAL WITH YOU DOESN'T MEAN HE'S DISRESPECTFUL AND WANTS TO HURT YOU.

HE WANTED TO CONFIDE WITH SOMEONE HE TRUSTS OVER EATING WITH YOU FOR A FEW MOMENTS. HE DIDN'T BULLY YOU OR HURT YOU OR TRY TO KILL YOU.

THERE IS A DIFFERENCE.

He's disrespectful towards Aiden. And has done worse to Aiden. He didn't even try to break up you and Ashley.

"All Jake does is talk about himself and his problems!"

YOU DO THE EXACT SAME GODDAMN THING.

She's right here though. Just... DAMN HYPOCRITE.

"Excuse me? You wouldn't shut up about Hunter when he got out. And you didn't see me complaining!"

Oh come on. That's a low blow.

Even if that is entirely correct.

"Cram it!"

THANK YOU ASHLEY.

I feel so bad for Ashley. She has to put up with BOTH of their BULLSHIT.

You know what? Ashley deserves to win JUST FOR THIS.

"I will burn our tent and make us all sleep in the goddamn mud!"

OH THE FOOT IS DOWN!

"I gotta say, I'm mighty disappointed."

Me too girl. Me too.

"Ha! Hear that Ally?"

NOPE. SHE MEANS BOTH OF YOU. DROP IT, JAKE.

"Shut up Jake!"

YEP. THERE IT IS.

You lost Ashley, Jake. This is your downfall.

"I thought we could be a civilized folk and hash things out like adults! But I guess we're just not ready for that! I GIVE UP!"

👏🔥

COOK THEM.

COOK THEM BOTH!!!

Also PROPS TO ASHLEY'S VA FOR THAT. GODDAMN. SHE KILLED IT.

I have to admit though, even though I fully understand Jake started this and he is FAR from being an 'innocent bean' and he has more to apologize for than Allyson, who really doesn't have much...

I'm kinda on his side here. Because you know what? Even if that apology was dogshit, AT LEAST HE TRIED TO FIX THINGS. HE TOOK THE STEP TO TRY. HE DID NOT WANT THIS BEEF TO KEEP GOING.

Allyson has nothing to apologize for, that's not what was asked here, but that does NOT give her the moral high ground to be just as bad and snap back at his face. Especially since SHE'S the one that suffers the most from this in this situation.

Like, come on, you cannot guarantee Ashley will flip since she's been close to Jake far longer than you, and you yourself saw that early on. You HAVE to work with Jake. There's no other choice unless you want to be voted out!

You have to work with shitty people sometimes!

I'm not saying Allyson can't hate Jake. She CAN. I have no problems with her hating Jake. If he hurt her, then he hurt her. It's pretty understandable to hate Jake. SHE OWES HIM NOTHING. SHE HAS EVERY SINGLE RIGHT TO DISLIKE JAKE IF THAT IS HER CHOICE.

The problem isn't that. The problem is HOW she's going about her hatred. Which is "Keep up the beef and fight with him and rile him up". Which solves absolutely nothing for either of them.

OVER AN IPAD MIND YOU!! STILL NOT OVER THAT!!!

I WOULD UNDERSTAND CONSISTENT HARRASSMENT AND BEING FRAMED FOR SOMETHING NASTY LIKE AIDEN, BUT AN IPAD. STUPID.

I hope both of them sleep in mud like Ashley suggested.

"Tess! Oh no..."

Okay now I feel bad for her. I admit.

That's pretty sad.

"It was my doing. I'm sorry."

Huh. Gabby straight up admits it and apologizes.

See? She's not a bad bean. She's just working with bad beans.

Riya just comes over and tells Gabby, "Hey uh, you're not supposed to apologize. You're evil. Take pride!"

"I don't have my lesbian flag on me right now."

"Not THAT kind of pride-"

"I did it for Ellie!!!"

"How's everyone feeling about their teams?"

Uh, let's see...

Yellow Team Dominating The Competition:

Cyan Team Feeling A Sense Of Dread Everywhere They Turn:

Magenta Team At The Waffle House:

Yeah. I think this is accurate to the state of this season.

"You guys have been together for nineteen days!"

JESUS CHRIST. HOW IS NO ONE DEAD?!

"Surely, the bonds have formed between all you lot!"

Two of the three teams are trying to kill each other. But sure.

"Ahahahahahahha oh my god good one!"

I hate that you laughed at my own point.

Do I look like I'm trying to be funny? /j

"Congratulations to our Top Ten All Stars!"

We got an evil queen.

Bad dad rivaling Peter Griffin.

The ghost cop.

Skunk haired punching bag.

Devoted Lesbian cosplaying as evil.

Pig.

Pig's girlfriend.

Drama King.

Drama sticker on her gaming chair.

And Ashley.

What a Top 10 Indeed.

"You'll start over at a new campground!"

Oh shit XD

"DAMMIT. WE HAVE TO LIVE TOGETHER?! I ALREADY LOST SOME FAB SLEEPING WITH YUL!"

"Are you fucking kidding me?!"

😂

NO RIYA ACTUALLY SWEARING THREW ME OFF GUARD! 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

"For my next showing, cause my lost my beauty shower and I'm PISSED, I am going to test your producer's ability to use the profanity sensor!"

NO RIYA THIS IS ON YOUTUBE!

"Oh quit your whining people. Geez, you'd think a few weeks out here would grow some character."

Disventure Camp Haters Be Like ^

"I'll call you guys back for your immunity challenge tomorrow."

Everyone tomorrow:

I don't think they're gonna make it.

"The real worry is that I have to sleep next to nine other people!"

Sleep with one eye open too.

I guarantee at least half of them are gonna murder you.

"Just when our camp was starting to get comfortable..."

YOU DRAMA QUEEN, OH MY GOD.

"We need a fire before it gets dark."

That's the first thing you suggest?

"We need fire."

"So I can burn Jake's hair off?"

"No."

"Gabby, you wanna make yourself useful and come with us to get firewood?"

"Sure!"

Aw! Gabby making some friends!

Oh...

Oh this is gonna be hard for Jake.

He's staying for one day. But still.

"Despite everything, I can see you were trying, Jake."

Oh I thought she'd still be pissed.

Also the subtitle actually says "You ARE trying".

But I heard "You WERE trying."

So I don't know what to believe.

"Keep those emotions down."

"And your mouth shut."

Jake BREATHES at the campfire with everyone, and then either Aiden or Allyson smash their burned marshmallow in his face.

"Hey, look on the bright side. Sharing camps now means Tom can't avoid you."

Depending on what Tom does, that's a very questionable bright side.

I hope Tom at least takes accountability though. He wanted to last episode. I'd be upset if that didn't get followed up on.

"One can only hope. Thanks Ashley."

Awww

Curious why Ashley is still helping him out?

She was yelling at him like, two scenes ago.

"So you're with us one hundred percent?"

Oh the recruiting XD

"Sign the contract, please. So we can own your soul."

"I even thought of my villain name! Want to hear it?"

"The Forest Marauder!"

Oh my god I love her XD

Forest Marauder. Okay... I mean it suits her.

"I'm going to start sketching my mask and cape later."

OH SHE'S SO CUTE I LOVE HER SO MUCH!!!❤️

YOUR HONOR, I LOVE GABBY. I WANT NOTHING BUT THE BEST FOR HER!!! ❤️

"So we're working with Tumblr Girl now?"

*PUNCHES DESK*

YOU FUCKING TAKE THAT BACK YOU SON OF A BITCH!😡

I DON'T CARE IF THAT WAS DIRECTED AT GABBY OR ME! YOU TAKE THAT BACK RIGHT NOW!!😡

Yes, hitman? I have a target for you. I want this fire crop top man DEAD.🔫

There's no gun emoji. Only a water gun.

Sure, kill him with a water gun. I don't care how you do it. MAKE IT HAPPEN!!!

Anyway my punching ricochet my phone to the other side of the room-

It's fine. THE PHONE IS FINE.

NO PHONES WERE HARMED IN THE MAKING OF THIS REACTION.

"Well Tom and Aiden kicked Ellie out. They should be our first targets."

It's not that bad of logic, actually. Tom IS the physically best one the other side's got.

"I don't trust Ashley or Jake either, so they can die next."

She's actually planning murder.

What about Allyson? No Allyson? Why does she get off the hook?

"I beg your pardon, did you just say 'die'?"

IT'S EXAGGEATING GRETT. WE'RE NOT ACTUALLY GONNA KILL THEM.

I feel like I do not need to explain this to anyone. But you get some people who don't get that.

Gabby just like me fr.

Yeah, sorry if my formatting makes it hard to understand sometimes, that's just how typing reactions instead of making a video works so you can't hear my voice, but most of these overkill things I say are JOKES. Okay? I don't actually encourage murder. I don't think any of these characters should do it. I am simply invested in media and I exaggerate some things. I don't actually mean the literal thing I am saying in these.

Just because I stan some really problematic characters does not mean I want to endorse their poor behavior on anyone else.

Cool? Cool.

Okay moving on.

I use Tumblr instead of YouTube so A) I can swear. B) My voice is so high pitched and grating to the ears whenever I record it. So nobody would ever want to hear that.

I AM actually doing my voice impressions as I type them though. Those aren't just in my head. I have fun doing them.

"We need a plan or this will be a tie."

I don't think you need one.

Just leave Jake to his own devices.

"I've heard Aiden and Tom talk about problems they've had with Jake."

Too obvious.

The villains winning is going to be entirely Jake's fault.

"Well I think it's time to shake the beehive ahahahahahaha!"

Dude. Gabby just got in and she's better than you.

"Feels so early for the merge."

Not really.

We got what, twenty one episodes? This is episode 10?

*Doing math* We get rid of someone this episode, then the next episode it's eight, seven, six...

No you get to Episode Seventeen by the time you get to the Final Three.

So four episodes are just non-elimination I guess. Idk why.

Maybe it's a plot twist here that no one goes in this episode because it's merge.

"I'm worried about catching enough food for ten people."

Damn these bitches are HUNGRY.

I feel like I already made this joke.

*I did*

Don't worry about Jake. He's not eating anything.

He rejected what, three meals now? Yeah don't worry about him.

You guys have no idea how crazy this is driving me. I NEED TO SEE THE GUY EAT SOMETHING. FOR THE LOVE GOD I'M WORRIED ABOUT HIS HEALTH.

"At least there's one win, Jake hasn't started shit for an entire hour, that must be a world record."

OH WE'RE ALREADY GOING STRAIGHT FOR IT.

'EVERYBODY DISS JAKE' NIGHT.

"Should I tell him?"

"About your fake boyfriend?"

YES.

TOM YOU WANTED TO DO THIS LAST EPISODE. JUST DO IT.

Jake is gonna be LIVID. But god, just do it.

"In hindsight I-I feel awful. I wish I just told him the truth and making this story up probably just made him feel worse."

Yeah. Yeah that wasn't your best move.

Props to Tom though for recognizing his mistakes and willing to take accountabity for them.

"You know I'm not the biggest fan of Jake, but even he doesn't deserve that."

Wow.

Aiden got much worse of an end of the stick from Jake than Allyson ever did. Getting shoved on the beach. Being sabotaged on the ship. Being falsely accused of cheating.

And the fact that Aiden, despite that, is somehow more open to understanding Jake's situation and helping him, even though he doesn't like him, IS GIVING ME SO MUCH RESPECT FOR AIDEN.

HOW DO YOU HAVE MORE MATURITY THAN ALLYSON DOES EVEN THOUGH YOU WERE CHARACTERIZED TO BE HOT HEADED? HOW?!?!

"I do not like this guy. At all. And I don't owe him anything and I don't forgive him for anything. But I acknowledge the why. He's hurting. And hurting him more will just make things worse. So I'm just gonna hold my own fort."

Allyson, seriously, this is not rocket science.

"Last season I learned that problems are best talked openly instead of festering."

Awww.

That's actually really sweet of a carry over from his arc in Season 2.

He has to help this other gay couple figure out their shit. More traumatic shit than he and James ever went though. (My opinion)

"Let's just hope this doesn't end badly."

This is gonna end badly.

Oh this looks awkward.

Everyone just sitting here in dead silence.

Also I SEE YOU YUL. GET YOUR HANDS OFF HER!!

Op. Jake's out.

One look at Tom and he was like "NOPE".

Oh he's following him.

Oh boy, here we go...

"Jake?"

"Oh. Hey."

I already know this is gonna go bad.

But it needs to happen.

"Mind if we talk?"

"What's there to talk about? You're seeing someone."

Oh no...

"You gave me closure."

Oh no... 😢

"But what I did wasn't fair to you."

Oh god...

I mean, thank you Tom. Thank you for seeing the error of your ways and taking accountability.

You screwed up. But hey, that's all I can ask for.

"It's... it's okay Tom."

AW NO HE'S TEARING UP! NOOOOOOOO!

"You don't have to keep forcing yourself to be friends with me."

OH HE'S GONNA CRY!! NOOOO!!

I feel so unbelievably bad for both of them.

I feel like their relationship is so complicated. I wouldn't say a toxic relationship overall, but the Tom thing was a toxic thing to do. Like you're gonna tell me they're worse than Yul and Grett? Come on now.

They love each other. So much. They're the best things to ever happen to each other.

But they can't make a relationship work because they hate themselves. To an unfathomed degree. And it causes them to make mistakes where they feel they don't deserve the other.

You wanna love someone, you gotta love yourself. And these guys just don't. You can't blame either, but it's not an easy thing to overcome in a snap. Especially in this environment exploiting you.

So Tom taking the step forward to fully take accountability is a huge dub for them, regardless of how poorly Jake reacts to it. It's the best thing he can do now.

And Jake crying because he thinks everybody hates him and/or pretending to like him because of how much he hates himself and his own wrongdoings is... 😭💔

I hate how realistic this is for people like them. I want to give both of them a hug.

"I took some time to re-evaluate myself, and..."

And he realized he was the piece of shit all along.

He wasn't. It's not one sided.

"I've come to terms that you're in a relationship, and I don't want us to get any closer."

In another world where Tom didn't want to fix things, I would cheer for Jake character development. Cause I wanted this from the start before I understood it.

But now? This is just beyond sad.

"No, Jake, please, it's all my fault."

"I-I lied. I don't have a boyfriend. I'm not dating anyone."

There it is.

"So... you and Aiden are a thing?"

Cold. Freezing cold.

"Wait, then... why did you lie?"

"I just wanted to keep you away. I was scared."

"Scared of what?"

"That both of us would just end up getting hurt again!"

And there it is again.

Tom's scared of being hurt again. Like how he got his scars. He's scared of failure.

"Maybe we aren't meant to be."

💔

AWWWW NOOOOOOOOOO

NO YOU CAN'T DO THAT TO MY HEART!!!

YOU CAN'T JUST SAY THAT!!! 😭😭😭😭😭😭

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!

AM I GONNA CRY THIS EPISODE?!?!

"Do you know how much it hurt when you lied to me?"

Oh his voice is shaking.

"I-I know, I- I wanted to own up to it."

"Tom, I... I'm tired."

Oh...

I'm surprised he's not angry.

He's just tired.

Tired of everything.

"Is that all you had to say?"

He has much more to say, I think.

"Yeah."

"Then go. Please leave me alone."

💔

OH HE LOOKED BACK!

NO YOU CAN'T DO THAT!!

HE LOOKED BACK!!!

I can't blame Jake though. I'm surprised he's not angry. But he's just exhausted of the back and forth.

And I can't blame him. I've been there. Life gets lonely and you feel you deserve it.

💔The fact that these two didn't avoid each other because they hated each other. They did it because they loved each other but hated themselves so badly they felt like they weren't worthy.💔

"Why are we starting so early? I need my beauty sleep!"

"Okay, Yul forfeits and is out of the game!"

YES!!!

FUCKING YES!!!!!!!

YEEESSSS!!!! HE'S GONE!!!

OH MY GOD, THANK YOU! THANK YOU TOTAL DRAMA GODS!!!

"Relax, I was joking!"

NOOOOOOO!!! COME ON!

NO COME ON, WHY CAN'T YOU ACTUALLY BE LEGIT?!?!

Goddammit, stop playing with my head.

I WANT YUL GONE!! 😭

HE INSULTED ME!!

"A classic game of paintball."

Oh you better believe shots will be fired.

One of my YouTube playlists has Shots from LMFAO in another tab, actually. So uh... I might just use that.

"It'll be sudden death, which means everyone for themselves, and last person left who hasn't taken a bullet-"

🎵EVERYBODY IT'S ON!!!🎵

"We better have face protection."

I hope you don't so you get shot in the eye.

😂😂😂

👏👏👏

I HAVE TO HAVE A SUPERPOWER!!!!!

THERE AIN'T NO WAY!!!!

I JUST PREDICTED THAT JUST BEFORE IT HAPPENS!!!!

I CAN TORTURE YUL!!!!

Okay, counter of how many times this has happened so far.

Episode 6 was the first when the spotlight fell on him.

Episode 7, when they used Yul as a human shield for the yarn balls. I got that one.

Episode 8 I got the space trap.

Episode 9 I'm counting that cause I said "Punch him" and he got hit with the ball.

So yeah, five.

IN A ROW, TOO.

Predicting Yul's Torture Counter: 5

I don't like that you gave these guys guns.

You know half the people here are gonna slay with them.

"This challenge starts... now!"

Very surprised no one started firing right then and there.

"Let's go guys!"

"Gang gang!"

"Sounds good!"

Oh, so NOW all of a sudden they're good and cooperative again.

Something about respect, Allyson?

If Jake didn't respect you, he'd shoot you right then and there.

"I'm here to talk to you about your performance."

Oh yeah. You caught her.

"We checked the cameras, and have footage of you helping one of the participants among other rules you've broken."

So this really was illegal. Did Krystal not know about this when she hired her?

"Your contract clearly stated you cannot benefit the participants."

"And YUL of all people?! That's the nail in the coffin right there!"

"Yul didn't even want my help! That's not breaking the rules if he refused my help."

That's not how that works.

"I just told him his manager missed him."

That is very clearly a lie. They are partying over Yul's absense.

"You're fired."

Yep.

How CALMLY she said it too.

Totally deserved.

"I'm not trustworthy, but that crazy old man with his puppet is?"

Oh I forgot they were there.

Yeah. Fair. That puppet DID try to murder everyone.

"If we want to escalate the feud between Aiden and Jake, we can't let either of them win immunity."

Okay. That's a plan.

Yeah it really does not matter if a Jello wins immunity here or not. You can still vote off a member cause it's only one that you can't.

"You climb this tree and get ready to ambush."

The tree?

Dude, what if somebody shoots him while in the tree?

It would be a shame if he got shot off a tree is all I'm saying. That would hurt.

"I'll lead them here and when they're focused on me, you fire them all into oblivion!"

Won't they see right through that though if you're not firing yourself?

Why not a bush? Wouldn't that be safer and achieve the same thing?

"Guys, we need to put your beef aside. That villain's alliance is the enemy."

Ashley, they're not gonna listen to facts.

They WANT to lose. Apparently.

"Fine. If Jake agrees to stop being confrontational."

THANK YOU. WAS THAT HARD?!?!

Also 'confrontational'. He's been not wanting to hang out with you. That's the OPPOSITE of being confrontational.

If you said something like 'petty' or 'quick to anger' then that makes more sense.

"Are we going to have to work with Aiden and Tom?"

Yes.

"I don't think I'm ready to work with them."

I get it, but also, LISTEN TO REASON JAKE. FOR THE LOVE OF GOD.

I know you won't. But I'm still gonna yell at you for it.

This is the episode where Jake goes. The build up is all here.

He fucks up. Everyone hates him. Everyone votes him.

"Get your priorities in check!"

Ashley being the one reasonable person here!

OP-

🎵EVERYBODY IT'S ON!!!🎵

🎵SHOTS SHOTS SHOTS SHOTS SHOTS🎵

🎵SHOTS SHOTS SHOTS SHOTS SHOTS SHOTS🎵

🎵EVERYBODY!!!🎵

RIP TO ALLYSON.

OKAY HOW DID RIYA AND ALEC MISS THE THER TWO THOUGH?!?!

DAMN YOU TWO ARE BAD AIMS!

"Remember when we lost the paintball challenge in Season 1, Grett?"

Yeah I remember that.

She couldn't stand you.

"Yeah I remember! I also remember we lost because you wouldn't stop talking."

I mean I didn't expect Grett to be friendly anyway.

Finally! She's feeling like herself again.

"Sorry, haha, I'll shut up."

"Thank god."

She's so disappointed it was Gabby that joined them.

"Goddammit I have to work with this girl AGAIN?! What is my luck?! I end up with a shit boyfriend! And now THIS!"

"How about we hide behind a bush and wait for someone to come over?"

Hey that's what I said!

"We can't hide in a bush! Not with Grett's bovine behind."

Shoot him.

"Did you want me to lie?"

You're beautiful, Yul. You're amazing and kind and precious and I want to give you the world.

"There's a difference between being honest and just being cruel."

Thank you.

"And was it cruel when I saved your ass from a life of embarrassment?"

You did no such thing.

"What's wrong with you?! How could you say that to your girlfriend?!"

YES GABBY! JUMP IN HERE!!

TELL HIM OFF!!

FACE THE WRATH OF GABBY!!!

"This is as good as it's gonna get for her!"

"You're disgusting!"

TELL HIM!!!!

"I would never say this to Ellie!"

"Well duh! Ellie doesn't look like Miss Piggy!"

SAYS MR PIG!

WE'RE SHOOTING YOUR ASS IF YOU'RE NOT CAREFUL!

"Say that again and I'll leave the alliance!"

OOF.

THE THREAT.

YEAH SHE HAS CONTROL NOW BITCH!

WHAT DO YOU GOTTA SAY ABOUT THAT?!

"Why is everybody so sensitive?"

It's a mystery /s

🎵SHOTS SHOTS SHOTS SHOTS SHOTS🎵

🎵SHOTS SHOTS SHOTS SHOTS SHOTS SHOTS🎵

🎵EVERYBODY!!!🎵

THANK YOU! WHOEVER DID THAT!!

THANK YOU SO MUCH!!!

Eh...? I won't count this. I said it too early. And I was talking to Grett and Gabby, who weren't the ones that shot him. So yeah this doesn't count for the counter.

"Why is it always the face?!"

😂👏

HEADSHOT! LET'S GO!!

Oh it was Tom. Cool.

GABBY LOOKS SO FERAL!! 😂

I LOVE HER

🎵SHOTS SHOTS SHOTS SHOTS SHOTS🎵

Oh wow the tree strategy actually worked. You took out all three.

Aiden, you're pretty good.

I mean I shouldn't be surprised, he choked a puppet to death by shooting a lemon.

"I got in trouble and now Krystal fired me."

"What? No!"

Why do you care? You're not friends.

Who actually cares for this red head? I don't.

"You're the only person who ever pretended to pay attention to me!"

Really? Derek doesn't count?

Oh whatever. I don't give a fuck about either of you.

"I didn't pretend. Trevor, you're a good guy."

I don't give a fuck.

"You're going to finally talk to Derek and tell him how you feel."

I don't give a fuck.

Thank you. Cut back to the action.

I really do not care about these interns and their sub plot. Every time they're on screen I'm just waiting for it to cut back to the campers.

🎵SHOTS SHOTS SHOTS SHOTS SHOTS🎵

FRIENDLY FIRE.

GODDAMMIT TOM. WHY?!

YOU'RE A COP, TOO. YOU FAILURE.

"I thought you were Riya."

"DO NOT ASSOCIATE ME WITH THAT COWGIRL! WE ARE NOTHING ALIKE! AND WE LOOK NOTHING ALIKE!"

"We're so screwed."

Yes. Yes you are.

Jake's gonna go, and you guys are gonna have to find an idol OR convince Gabby to flip.

"We need you, me, Aiden, Jake, and Ally voting together to even tie them in a vote."

And that's IF you even win that. You can be perfectly cooperative, and STILL lose.

"And I doubt either of them are changing their minds about Jake."

It's not about liking him. It's not about him liking them. It's about saving your own damn skin.

"Huh, well isn't Jake Mr Popular?"

Aww, the way he said that with a smile. 😊

"Awwww, I'm so happy Jake is making enemies and becoming a popular guy among the group! Truly nice to see my ex is doing horribly!" 😊

"Jake is a good guy!"

REALLY. You saying that despite everything.

"Tom, you haven't treated him fairly, but we can discuss that later."

Yeah he knows.

Yeah you can tell from his face.

HE KNOWS.

HE WANTS TO FIX IT.

"I'll try to get Ally and Jake to agree to a truce."

Which will not happen because they both suck and don't know what truce means.

🎵SHOTS SHOTS SHOTS SHOTS SHOTS🎵

NO NOT THE QUEEN!! GODDAMMIT!!!

"You DARE shoot a queen in the face?! OH YOU'RE IN FOR IT!!"

NO AIDEN DON'T SHOOT-!

🎵SHOTS SHOTS SHOTS SHOTS SHOTS🎵

WHY. THE FUCK. WOULD YOU SHOOT HIM?!

DO YOU WANT TO MAKE EVERYTHING WORSE?!?!

"Oops. Sorry."

YOU ARE IN A GODDAMN TREE!! YOU HAVE CLEAR VISION!!

"I'm not the enemy Aiden. Are you blind?!"

Apparently he is blind.

*rewinds*

YEAH HE SAW. HE AIMED AND FIRED.

There ain't no way he didn't see him. HE'S IN A TREE!!!

"I thought you were one of the bad guys. Relax."

Jake's a bad guy. Ashley lied. Fair enough.

I don't buy that this was an accident. But fine.

"Don't take it so personally."

"I only shot you in the heart. Right where you feel personal things."

And now Jake's heart is LITERALLY painted black with personal vendetta.

"Oho then don't take this personally either!"

🎵SHOTS SHOTS SHOTS SHOTS SHOTS🎵

What did I say?

WHAT DID I SAY?!

Dude, what if somebody shoots him while in the tree?

It would be a shame if he got shot off a tree is all I'm saying. That would hurt.

I FREAKING CALLED THIS!

I TOLD YOU THIS WAS A BAD IDEA!

Also can you shoot even if you've already been shot?

I mean they never said no, but... I feel like this shouldn't count. We didn't see anyone else take advantage of this if this is allowed.

I'm talking game rules of course. JAKE. YOU ASSHOLE! WHY?!?!

"Man that felt good!"

GODDAMMIT JAKE!

WHY WOULD YOU DO THIS?!?!

"Seriously Jake, you've got major issues!"

No shit Sherlock.

"You know, Tom wants me to patch things up with you, but it's clear you're a lost cause!"

OOF.

Totally deserved, too.

And this is where Jake goes. He is a lost cause.

He can never EVER redeem himself. He's awful. End of story. Any sympathy the show has given him before does not matter.

This is how his story ends. He's just an asshole. And everyone who hates him are right to do so.

They are, actually. I'm not using sarcasm there.

"Oh you think you're so great, huh? That things just come easy to you? You're just Tom's useless sidekick."

Is-is Jake jealous that Aiden has a good life and he doesn't?

Where the hell did that come from?

"Dammit you two! Pull it together!"

🎵SHOTS SHOTS SHOTS SHOTS SHOTS🎵

Op and you lose.

I want to strangle everybody here that isn't Gabby Riya and Grett. And Ashley I guess, she didn't do anything wrong.

You all deserve to lose.

"And that's the game!"

Alec's like "Wow! So much for TRYING to break them up! They did that on their own! We don't have to do anything!"

The fact that the villains plotted to fuel the fire between Jake and Aiden, and then they didn't need to do anything because they did that by being left to their own devices XD

WOW.

This alliance is so powerful they don't need to try.

"I've given Jake so many chances to cool his jets. This guy is impossible to like!"

I don't exist...

Ah, so this is why everybody hates Jake.

I too want to strangle him. (Affectionate)

"I'm surprised he has any friends at all!"

He doesn't. He has a grandma. That's it.

He's gonna lose Ashley in a minute.

"Aiden is such a douchebag!"

YOU SHUT THE FUCK UP!

"We need to band together to get Aiden on that bus of losers."

YOU. STUPID. FUCK.

YOU'RE LEAVING TONIGHT. IT'S ALREADY BEEN DECIDED.

"We can't let them take the majority in this game! We're all at their mercy!"

YES. LISTEN TO REASON.

"I don't care! I have no interest in working with Aiden. He can burn in hell!"

I have Markeplier's voice in my head right now.

"You shut the fuck up." "YOU SHUT THE FUCK UP!" "YOU SHUT THE FUCK UP!" "I HOPE YOU DIE IN A FIRE!" "SHUT THE FUCK UP!"

"Jake, please, for once use your head and think about this."

OH NOW YOU CARE!

Whatever.

"I've made up my mind. I'm going to talk to Alec and get the villains to vote with us for Aiden."

Hey Ashley, something about how Jake is a good guy?

You might be wrong about that.

"Okay Jake, what will we do once Aiden's gone?"

"What else? STEAL THE IDOL!! I'M A MAD GENIUS!!"

"Win immunities, find totems, I don't know."

Yeah you have no plan.

"Eh I'll just wing it! That'll totally work in my favor!"

I'm going to be so here for it when Jake faces the consequences of his actions at this elimination.

"Why is it so difficult for Jake to use his head, not his heart?"

His heart sucks.

That's what you're implying.

It's perfectly in character for him. So I'm not mad about that. It makes sense for him to do this.

BUT ALSO I WANT TO STRANGLE HIM.

"No offense Tom, but your conversations with him haven't been working out."

You were the one that pushed him to talk to Jake. Just saying.

You do be right though.

Pain doesn't just go away, ya know? It's gonna make you lash out. That's normal. I KNOW.

"We have to take out Jake. It's him or us."

And it's gonna be him.

The only way an alliance will ever work is if Jake is not in it.

We hate Jake. That's the moral of the story.

"I didn't even have to try this time!"

AYO I SAID THAT TOO!

"Our alliance can really choose anyone we want. Whoever goes tonight will set the tone for the rest of the eliminations moving forward."

That's true.

It's gonna be Jake.

MAYBE you could keep him because he's a drama source?

But I really don't think that will happen.

So what it's two votes on Riya, one vote on Aiden, and then AT LEAST six votes for Jake?

That's what it sounds like.

ALL my money is on Jake being the boot here.

THERE IS NO WAY IT'S ANYONE ELSE.

"You all are the very best of our show."

WHY IS THE CAMERA ON YUL?

YOU LIAR.

OH TOM NO!!

"You left me no choice. Sorry Jake."

AWW

I get it though. After what happened.

OH ASHLEY'S VOTING AIDEN TOO?!?!

WHAT?!

"I would prefer to vote Riya, but I have to support Jake."

REALLY?

Damn I thought she would turn on him after this. SHE REALLY STUCK BY HIM. SHE REALLY KEPT HER WORD.

Of course Allyson voted Jake.

"It wasn't necessary to mention Hunter when we were arguing."

WHAT IS IT WITH YOU? ONE SCENE YOU WANT TO TOLERATE HIM, THE NEXT YOU DON'T. WHICH IS IT?!?!

Gabby's just vibing.

Oh god here we go...

Jake is so gone.

'JAKE'

It's over. He's so gone.

Oh don't look shocked.

'JAKE'

Do not look shocked. You caused your own elimination.

'AIDEN'

That's the only Aiden votes.

'JAKE'

The rest of these are just Jake. You don't even need to read all of these.

"Next vote..."

Ugh... come on. Just get it over with.

Jake is so gone. There's no way it's anyone else.

My heart's sinking. Jake's gone.

'ASHLEY'

⁉️

WAIT WHAT?!?!?!

WHAT-?!

WHA-?!

'ASHLEY'

OH THE VILLAINS!!!

OH MY GOD CAUSE SHE'S THE MORAL ONE!!!

'ASHLEY'

OH NOOOOOO!!!

*head is down in grief*

NOOOOO!!!

"Oh my god..."

"Look what you did Jake!"

REALLY?!?!?

"T-this-t-t-this can't be happening!"

OH MY GOD JAKE. NO!!

'ASHLEY'

REALLY?!

JAKE FUCKS UP AND ASHLEY IS THE ONE WHO PAYS FOR IT?!?!

*head is down in grief again*

Oh my god...

MY HEART IS LIKE, RACING RIGHT NOW.

I genuinely did not see this coming. I thought she was for sure safe.

Oh my god... 😢

Well... I DID predict that Jake would lose his only friend here. AND IT WOULD BE HIS FAULT.

HE DID. BUT IT WAS NOT IN THE WAY I THOUGHT.

AND IT WAS HIS FAULT.

THIS IS ENTIRELY BECAUSE OF HIM!!

"A-a-Ashley! Oh no! I-I-I'm so sorry!"

OH NO AND HE'S GONNA BLAME HIMSELF!! 😭

"It's alright Jake. Don't feel guilty again. I'm alright."

It's not alright. But you know. You give him way too much slack.

"If you didn't vote for me, that means Tom and Ally did."

Yeah cause they hate you.

"I-I'm sorry Jake."

I know you are. You were put in a corner.

"I-I can't believe this! I- y-you should still be here! IT'S ALL MY FAULT! I-I SHOULD JUST QUIT, I-"

😭

OH MY GOD JAKE NOOOOOOO

HONEY NOOOOOOO

*eyes are watery*

I'M GONNA CRY.

I'M ACTUALLY GONNA CRY.

"You made your decision. Now stand by it. You have to learn to look forward without dwelling on the past Jake. If anything, I hope I've been able to teach you that."

Ooooohhh....

Oh my god this episode is gonna kill me.

Remember when I was pissed at Jake and wanted to strangle him just a few minutes ago?

I'm right back to having him as my favorite character. In a snap.

"Man that three million dollars would have been nice though. Guess I'll save my farm in another season."

OH YEAH SHE WAS GONNA SAVE HER FARM!

Jake, ACTUALLY, you have to win this now. You can win the money FOR HER! You can just give the money to her.

You can ACTUALLY become the hero of this story!

OH MY GOD I REALIZE WHAT THEY'RE DOING WITH JAKE NOW!

She didn't give any hug to Allyson. Damn.

Awwwww Ashley nooooo. Bye!

"Why do I keep doing this? Now Ashley's gone, and it's all my fault. The one person who was willing to be my friend out here..."

Everyone hates you now. The only person that didn't is gone.

Good FUCKING luck.

"Hmm... we're in trouble."

That's all Aiden's gotta say XD

"Yeah maybe voting for someone who isn't 'evil' just 'a douchebag' wasn't a good idea for our game after all."

HMMMMM, IT'S ALMOST LIKE I'VE BEEN SAYING THIS THE WHOLE GODDAMN TIME!!

"Yeah, it might have been fun to get rid of Aiden once and for all, but it's more fun to watch him continue squabbling with Jake."

Yeah cause he's drama to prevent them from working together.

QUEEN IS SMART. 👑

THIS WAS ACTUALLY THE SMARTER PLAY.

"Ashley was the glue that was holding the 'heroes' together."

True.

But I would NOT call them heroes.

With heroes like these guys, who needs villains?

Oh god what an episode...

That was an emotional roller coaster.

That might actually be one of my favorite Disventure Camp eliminations EVER.

Definately Top Three.

I REALLY like how that was executed.

Fuck Jake though. He caused this. Everyone hates him, and it is well deserved.

What. A. Dickhole.

...

Affectionate

Okay but actually, I love this.

I love this for his character.

Yes he's an asshole, but it makes sense as to why, it's very well explained why he's acting the way he is. We are shown multiple instances of sympathy you feel for him, because he is not entirely horrible.

He's not evil. But he's got major issues. It's such a strong line in between the two. I kinda feel like both instances of adoring him and glossing over his faults, and screaming hate on him and ignoring the POV, are a disservice to what this actually is.

AND HE ACTUALLY GETS CONSEQUENCES FOR HIS ACTIONS!

This was the best way he could've possibly gotten it too.

The dude is NOT motivated by money. His desire is LOVE. Companionship. Something he only ever received from his now dead grandma as a child. Everyone who claims to like him turns on him and uses him, and now he is in no interest of giving anyone a chance.

So eliminating him here would NOT be a consequence, actually. Because then he learns nothing. He would have gotten away with it.

So instead, you do something that stings more than that. You take away his only friend who gave him a chance despite everything. And now he is completely alone with everyone around him loathing him.

Despite everything, Ashley still saw his worth.

And because of said worth, she's gone.

I went into this season knowing Jake was going to be an asshole. It made sense after Season 1. So I'm not surprised. What I'm surprised with is how sympathetic they still made him.

But I also said, EVERY TIME, "Jake is going to be a Pre-Merge Boot/Early Merge Boot."

WELL THIS JUST PROVED THAT ENTIRELY WRONG.

He is not going anywhere.

This dude just became the main driving force of this entire season's story. Regardless if he wins or not. He has to redeem himself. That's the only way anyone else here stands a chance.

There's nowhere else for his character to go but up.

So then he has to be the 'hero' of this story. That's the only thing that makes sense with this setup.

He might actually win. I said there was no way. But NOW?! HE MIGHT ACTUALLY PULL OFF WINNING.

AND HE CAN DO IT FOR ASHLEY.

He just gives the money to Ashley.

Jake, worst player of the game. But story-wise? HE IS THE MVP FOR ME.

My favorite characters are the ones that are messy and flawed and acknowledged as such by the story, but still understandable and human. And Jake fits this near perfectly.

WE STAN JAKE IN THIS HOUSEOLD!👑

NOW WHO WANTS TO JOIN AIDEN AND ALLYSON IN THE JAKE HATE CLUB THEY GOT GOING ON? THAT SOUNDS FUN!

Yeah this episode was a roller coaster for me. This and the last episode? Yeah, things are starting to get interesting.

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