#the general election is only just starting and it’s already really bad

[mischievouslittlecreature]

Part 22: This Misery We've Made

Fandom: Peaky Blinders

Pairing: Tommy Shelby x OC

Summary: Approval numbers and public perception of Tommy's personal life force him and Lucy to face some painful realities.

Word Count: 3,519

Notes: Not really sure if I'm entirely happy with this chapter, but I've been fiddling with it for so long and I just need to move on. Hope you all still like it! Warnings for depictions of insecurity and references to past abuse and polyamory.

Previous Part • Series • Fic • Next Chapter

Chapter 1: Too Late

“No.”

Lucy sighed, looking pleadingly into Tommy’s glacial eyes as they hardened over with stubbornness. 

“Tommy, love, we both know it would fix all of these problems…”

“As we’ve already discussed to exhaustion.” His jaw ticked. “I won’t do it.”

“Sweetheart,” she broke eye contact with him to look down at the papers settled in her lap. Her hands fiddled with her rings, gaze glued  to the infernal numbers emblazoned upon the reports, as if staring at them hard enough would cause them to shift and change. “It’s not getting any better. If anything, it’s only going to get worse.”

“The constituents don’t seem to care,” he huffed, reaching into his pocket for his cigarette case. “Considering that they elected me.”

She frowned. “Because we bribed your way in. And besides, I’m not sure if a lot of them even knew then. You weren’t exactly shouting your marital status and Ruby’s parentage from the rooftops.” Not that he’d hid it, per say. He just avoided discussing it during the campaign and while in settings related to his work. “And they might not care now, but what about when your political rivals start harping about it in the press? They’re already using it to try to shut you out of certain things. Not to mention that arsehole from Oxford who keeps using it to try to cut down all your arguments in the house.”

“Fucking ridiculous,” Tommy shook his head, lighting his cigarette and releasing a puff of smoke from his lips up towards the ceiling.

They were seated in his office in the House of Commons, the big wooden double doors that led out into the workroom that she shared with the other secretary, Adam, closed. Not that they needed to be. Adam had already gone home for the evening, as had most of the other MPs and their staff. No one would be interrupting them. It was late, nothing but darkness and a flickering streetlight visible out the window. 

She was still getting used to spending her days working in the offices of the House of Commons rather than the betting shop or the office in Birmingham. While the general decor and design of the building was not all that dissimilar–outside of just being bigger–there was something distinctively different about this place. A stuffiness and sense of propriety that served as a thin veil for the egos and superiority that radiated from so many of the men who sauntered through its halls. It was a bit of a shock to go from Small Heath, where just about everyone knew her name and she was decidedly near the top of the food chain as far as both authority and respect goes, to here where she was lucky if the MP just next door could even remember her name. In these offices, she was not the Red Demon, or even Lucy Winters. Here she was just Thomas Shelby’s Assistant. And was treated as such. 

It wasn’t all bad, of course. She still got to spend most of her days at Tommy’s side, and the work was not that different from what she’d been doing for him before. 

“I agree, but that’s the way that things are, love.” She shifted uncomfortably in her seat. “And your constituents do care. That’s what these numbers are all about,” she nodded to the report in her lap. “More and more of them indicated that while they’re happy with your performance and policies, they’re troubled by your conduct regarding your personal life.” She held out the papers, and he took them with a reluctant sigh, pulling his glasses from his pocket and sliding them onto his nose so he could look them over himself. 

“Doing…doing this,” Lucy swallowed, unable to bring herself to utter the thing that, ever since Ruby’s birth–and certainly ever since he was elected–hovered threateningly over them. The guillotine teetering precariously above their heads. “It would help improve your standing with the more traditional and family focused members of your constituents. And might even open up some more doors for you here with the conservative MPs. God knows we already have a hard enough time working with them.” Bunch of racist, classist dickheads was what they were. All too eager to look down their nose at the man who had clawed his way from the bowels of Small Heath’s dirty streets to the halls of power. They already had enough reasons to attempt to shut Tommy out, they really didn’t need to be giving them anymore ammunition. 

Tommy met her eyes, and she saw a crack appear in his resolve. Deep down, they both knew that she was right. This needed to be done. 

Even if it was going to break both their hearts. 

Tommy closed his eyes, head tilting up as he released another stream of smoke from his lips. His brow pinched with stress, the skin around his temples tightening. 

She forced herself to be strong. “You know just as well as I do how important image is to the people we’re now surrounded by. And to the people you’ve been elected to serve. We can’t just…shrug off what other people think of our personal lives anymore. Presenting the image of a proper family will solve nearly all the current problems outlined in those numbers.” 

His lips pursed. He was not seated behind his desk, but rather in the chair next to hers in front of it, one leg crossed over the other. One of his hands lifted to touch the side of his face, thumb moving across his lips while he examined her shrewdly and listened to her argument.

“We can’t ignore this forever. It has the potential to ruin everything you’ve worked so hard for.” She looked him hard in the eye, beseeching him to understand. He still just stared at her, clearly fighting against the knowledge that he knew she was right. “There’s only one clear solution that I can see that fixes pretty much all problems at once.”

How many times had they discussed this? Too many to count. And he always shot the idea down instantaneously. When Polly tried to push it harder on one of their more recent meetings, he’d nearly ripped her head off. 

“Look, you know what my suggestion for a solution is. If you have any others, I’m happy to hear them.” She was suddenly in dire need of a cigarette. Sensing her need, Tommy silently held out the one clutched between his fingers towards her. She took it with a noticeably unsteady hand, bringing it gratefully to her lips. Tommy watched all of her movements closely, knuckles pressed up against his lips, frown still firmly in place. Picking up the report of his approval numbers, his eyes skimmed over the front page once more before tossing it onto his desk, removing his glasses and putting them back in his pocket.

The silence while he mulled over her words seemed to stretch on forever, only interrupted by the rhythmic ticking of the clock on the mantle. Lucy had to fight back the desire to fill it with more near nonsensical babbling. 

Why was she even arguing for this so bloody hard? She should be happy that he’d instantly dismissed the suggestion the very first time that she brought it up. Hell, she was, from a purely selfish standpoint.

Tommy’s hand dropped from where it was resting against his lips to take one of hers, thumb running along her knuckles. 

“I don’t want to marry Lizzie,” he said softly.

She met his gaze sadly. “I know.” I don’t want you to marry her either. But she knew if she told him that, she would never manage to convince him to go through with it. He’d refuse forever all on account of her feelings, even if it meant that he could lose everything he’d worked so hard for.  

The idea that he could lose it all and it would be her fault made her feel sick with guilt.

“But we’re being backed into a corner here, love,” she chose her words carefully. “Being unmarried with an illegitimate child makes some of your constituents think that you don’t value families. If you want to stop your approval numbers from dipping, and even have a shot at reelection in a few years…”

“I haven’t even thought about reelection, yet.”

She gave him a look that was both stern and fond in equal measure. “Now, we both know that isn’t true.”

His lips quirked upwards slightly, eyes warming at how well she knew him. But when he scooted closer to her, sadness quickly leaked back into his expression, lips turning downwards.

“I don’t love her.”

“I know,” she repeated, feeling even worse at the spark of relief that statement brought her. Poor Lizzie. 

He shot her a look of deep, unending regret, brushing some hair out of her face. Her eyes fluttered at the warm press of his palm against her cheek when he cupped it. “I promised you that I wouldn’t marry her,” he whispered. 

“You said that you didn’t plan to,” she corrected, recalling the conversation when he first informed her of Lizzie’s pregnancy. The things he’d murmured to her whilst holding her on the floor of their bedroom while she cried. “Plans can change.”

“I am not leaving you,” there was zero room for argument in his voice, jaw shifting stubbornly. 

“Lizzie might not agree to marry you if you don’t.”

Tommy shook his head. “It’ll be a marriage of convenience only. You and me still being able to be together is non-negotiable. I’m not budging on that.”

She smiled a little in spite of herself at his devotion, leaning her face deeper into his palm. “It feels terribly unfair to her.”

“She can always say no if she really can’t handle it. We’ll be clear about what it’ll all entail, so she doesn’t get the wrong idea about any of it meaning something between me and her. Besides, she’s been warmer towards you lately.”

That was true. Though who knew how long that would actually last.

Scooting his chair closer to hers, Tommy leaned forward, holding her face with both hands, forehead resting against hers. 

“Are you sure you’re okay with it?” he asked urgently. Lucy swallowed hard. The thought of watching him stand up at an altar and make vows and promises to another woman, of having to live under the same roof as Lizzie and share him with her for the rest of their lives…

It burned harshly in her chest, cracks forming in her already fragile heart. 

But she could live with it. It was a sacrifice she was willing to make if it meant that Tommy would not lose all he’d worked so extremely hard to achieve. 

Maybe…maybe it actually wouldn’t be all that bad. He was right that Lizzie had been kinder and more amicable towards her as of late. Perhaps she would even be agreeable to all three of them sharing a bed from time to time, like they used to. And it would be nice to have Ruby in the same house as them so they could see her more. She and Charlie could be raised as proper siblings. 

“Yes,” she said, unknowingly sealing both their fates. “So long as we don’t have to break up.”

“I won’t ever let that happen,” Tommy promised. She leaned in closer to him, hands resting on his forearms. Tommy gave her a little tug. “Come here,” drawing her from her chair, he pulled her into his lap, wrapping his arms around her and burying his face in her hair. “I love you.”

“I love you too,” she murmured into his chest, arms winding around his neck. “I hate to say ‘I told you so,’ but…”

He snorted, lightly pinching her hip. “Yeah, yeah.” Lips ghosting across her temple, he silently urged her face back enough so that he could kiss her softly. “I mean it. I won’t let us be torn apart.”

A small smile pulled at her lips, his reassurance like a band-aid over her fracturing heart while he kissed her again. 

∗ ∗ ∗

“Well,” Lizzie said, adjusting her fingers around her cigarette, straightening in her chair. Even sitting down, she looked tall, the way in which she sat with her spine entirely straight only adding to the effect. She looked between Tommy and Lucy seated before her at the other side of the round table in front of the fireplace in Tommy’s Birmingham office. “That’s one hell of a way to propose to someone.”

Lucy winced a little at the underlayer of bitterness in Lizzie’s voice, looking down at her hands in shame.

“Technically you aren’t being proposed to until we know that you agree to our…conditions,” Tommy was much less phased by Lizzie’s reaction, puffing on his cigarette whilst eyeing her from around the vase of deep red roses on the table between them. 

“I’m pretty sure that I know what those are already,” Lizzie huffed, shifting in her seat, briefly glancing at the fire crackling away in the hearth. She looked back at them, and gave a little gesture with the hand holding her cigarette for him to continue. “But let’s hear them anyway.” 

Tommy adjusted himself in his seat, leaning forward with one of his arms resting on the table. When he spoke, his voice had taken on the commanding edge that Lucy had heard him use when giving orders to his men or family members. 

“After we are married, you and Ruby will come to live at Arrow House. You will enjoy all luxuries that the home and the title as my wife offers. All we expect is that you help take care of the children and manage things that have to do with the household. You can continue to hold a position on the company’s board, if you’d like. But most importantly,” he glanced over at Lucy, holding her gaze steadfastly before turning back to Lizzie, “Lucy and I will still get to be together.”

The area around Lizzie’s lips tightened slightly. “So you aren’t offering me a real marriage, but only one of convenience.”

To his credit, Tommy did not flinch away from her stern, accusing gaze. “Yes; that’s exactly what I’m offering you.” 

Lizzie leaned back into her chair, nursing at her cigarette as she contemplated. Lucy struggled to meet her gaze when it shifted periodically over to her, guilt roiling through her like a tempestuous storm. She’d never been able to shake the feeling that if she were not around, Tommy and Lizzie may have actually stood a chance together. And she was pretty certain that Lizzie thought the same exact thing. 

“I want you to promise that you will be discreet,” Lizzie finally said very slowly. “I will not be publicly humiliated by my husband openly fucking another woman.”

“Of course,” Lucy nodded. They already had toned down most displays of physical affection whilst in public, presenting instead as simply colleagues who happened to be good friends. Gestures of romance were saved for behind closed doors. It was not unlike it was prior to Grace’s death, when the three of them had to practice restraint to avoid a scandal. “And we’re willing to make accommodations to make sure you and Ruby are comfortable.”

“Within reason,” Tommy interjected quickly. 

“I want a honeymoon,” Lizzie said decisively. “A real one. With just you and me.” Her eyes wavered from Tommy to fix on Lucy, then darted back to him. Lucy thought she caught a glimpse of pleading in her face. 

The mere idea of them going on a romantic vacation together without her left insecurity brewing beneath her skin, but Lucy forced herself to ignore it. Considering what they were asking of her, it felt like it was the least that they could do. “Okay.”

Tommy shot her a glance. “We’ll have to talk about it,” he modified. 

Lizzie nodded. “Of course.” The clock on the mantle chimed. “I have to head home. I promised the nanny I’d be back by half past five. I can come by this weekend to work out more of the details if you’d like.”

“Yes, that would be good. You have a ride home?” Tommy asked, both he and Lucy standing after Lizzie stubbed out her cigarette in the ashtray and rose to her feet. 

“Yes, Skudboat offered to drop me off.”

“Right. We’ll see you this weekend, then.”

“Give Ruby a kiss from us,” Lucy requested timidly. Lizzie shot her a smile that actually seemed half genuine. 

“I will.”

They bid her goodbye, Lucy waiting until the door swung shut behind her before sinking exhaustedly back into her chair. She was struck at how transactional the whole exchange had been. Like ironing out a business deal rather than arranging a marriage.  

The floorboards creaked under Tommy’s heavy footsteps as he approached her. Reaching out, he rubbed a hand up and down on her upper arm, bending to kiss her forehead. 

“Are you alright?”

She stuffed the guilt bubbling up within her back down, locking it away in a far corner of her mind. “Yeah.”

“I can get out of the honeymoon if it makes you uncomfortable. Or insist that you come along.”

“It’s fine,” she probably said it too quickly to be convincing. “It’s the least that we can do for her, considering.”

“I don’t like the idea of going without you.”

“Me neither,” she admittedly, finally looking up to meet his concerned blue orbs. “But it’s just one week.” She knew him better than to expect that he’d be willing to take more than that off work. “We’ll live.”

He stroked her face tenderly, brow furrowing slightly. “You don’t have to give her everything that she wants. I know that you feel bad, even though you really shouldn’t, but…” he trailed off, tucking a lock of hair behind her ear, thumb brushing down her cheek. “If she pushes too far, if she’s unkind to you, or asks for something you aren’t comfortable with, all you have to do is tell me, and I’ll take care of it, alright?”

Nodding, she turned her face to kiss the center of his palm. “Thank you,” covering his hand with hers, she smiled weakly. “Congratulations on your engagement.”

“Ugh,” he made a face as though he’d just been told he was sentenced to be executed, rather than engaged to be married, and dropped his head forward until it was resting against her shoulder. Lucy wrapped her arms around him, burrowing her face into his hair, breathing in the scent of his soap and cologne. “I wish it was you,” he mumbled sorrowfully against her throat, and for a dreadful moment Lucy actually thought that she might start to cry. 

“I know.” And though she did not say it–for fear that if she did, he would call the whole damn thing off and throw his reputation and all professional prospects in the bin–they both knew the words circulating within her head:

Me too.  

When he first brought up the topic of marriage, all the way back in 1918, before Grace had even walked into their lives, she had told him that it was not something she was sure that she wanted. She was still living with the trauma of being previously engaged to a monster who hurt and abused her, and the only example of marriage she’d had was the loveless, horrific mess that was her parents. It was something he’d respected, unconcernedly promising that marriage or no marriage, he would still love her forever.

After Grace died, the topic had passed briefly every once in a while across her mind. With times changing and modern perspectives growing in popularity, it was no longer a necessity that she stop working if she were married. And with the slow passage of time, the idea of marriage no longer seemed to her like a cage to be bound and gagged within. She knew that Tommy would never expect her to change simply because he placed a ring on her finger. 

But she didn’t bring it up to him, both of them were still aching too terribly from Grace’s death. It was too soon. For them personally, for Charlie, and for either of their reputations. 

And then the vendetta had happened. And for a bit of fun they took Lizzie down to the canal for a fuck like they so often did before Grace stepped into their lives. 

If only she hadn’t still been so messed up on the topic the first time that he asked. If only she’d expressed her changing feelings on the matter with him before Lizzie got pregnant. Maybe things would be different. 

She could not say anything about it now. If she did, he would abandon this plan that was poised to solve so many problems for him. Not to mention that marrying her instead of Lizzie would create a whole new set of issues for him to deal with, some with the potential to wreck everything he’d accomplished.

It was too late.  

Previous Part • Series • Fic • Next Chapter

Thank you for reading! Please consider leaving a comment, reblog, or like. I always appreciate feedback and love getting the opportunity to interact with you and hear your thoughts!

[scattergoriesofevil]

Reading dismissive lectures on the internet does not make it any easier for those of us in the US who prefer metric to convince the others to consider it. I’m trained in metric because my background is science, but I live in a world of inches and pounds and cups and gallons (I hate it). Not only do I use both systems fluently, but I convert between them which is just a constant low level irritation.

I still have zero intuitive feel for Celsius and a very wobbly one for meters/kilometers, and I’m keenly aware it’s due to lack of everyday use. Every time someone yells about American use of Fahrenheit on the internet, I just go stare at a wall for a few minutes. It’s not helping. It’s the opposite of helping.

Everything is on fire here in the US. The quality of life for the average person is really not good, and everything that can be burned to fuel outrage and propaganda by the right wing to complete their power grab can and will be. The people who are paid millions of dollars to craft talking points and campaign ads for every idiot in a tie running as a Republican can craft a message that says “The metric system is multiculturalism gone too far! Liberals! France! Communism! The Soviet Union! Our sacred history of inches and miles!” faster than I can write a 5 sentence email. It works, too. They’ve been screaming about their God given right to a gas stove for over a year ever since the government said “Hey this contributes to childhood asthma! We’re really concerned.”

You know what helps? Showing people how awesome and reasonable the metric system is. Demonstrating how much easier it is to use. Telling Americans we are ass backwards over and over again just gets us one step closer to a Republican governor outlawing the use of metric in schools and requiring that the metric side of all rulers be censored with blackout tape.

Do

You

Think

I Am

Joking?

We redesigned how math is taught to little kids in the last decade or so, and that has been fuel for the dumbest shit you can imagine. Everything is fuel for knee-jerk propaganda here right now. As much as our current system sucks, the government has crept it forward quietly over decades and for now that’s all we’re going to get. I genuinely hope we still have a republic by this time next year, and in the meantime, however we are measuring temperature is the least of our fucking problems.

i think if yanks can't even recognise that the only reason they find farenheit intuitive is because they were raised with it, there's basically no chance of being able to get them to analyse all the other, more important implicit biases they've been raised with

[rosemariad]

THE BITTER END | SPN 15x18 DESPAIR: About that Destiel moment in 15x18

Oh boy…the scene that sailed a thousand memes (and counting)…the scene that made us all go feral in the midst of a contentious presidential elections in one of the most disruptive, chaotic years in recent memory (2020 you son of a bitch)

Now i am super late with this since it’s nearly been 4 years since this was aired live on TV and posted like crazy all over the internet BUT…y’all Destiel shippers got robbed. Not just with this scene but the whole Destiel ship in general - just done so dirty.

I started watching this show on and off back in 2021 and I finally got to finish over the summer this year (2024) taking my sweet time, even rewatching certain episodes (for some fanfic writing 😁). I went into this to settle the debate for myself - is this Destiel stuff legit? Or was it taken out of context? Misconstrued.

No. It really wasn’t. They (the powers behind SPN) tried it, tried to pull the wool over people’s heads, with certain fans chiming in (the destiel haters, the homophobes, the anti-mishas, etc.) but no. The SPN showrunners fucked all this up.

From the beginning….

So it’s 15x18 despair - we’re in the last act - shit’s popping off, everything’s going tits up - Billie is trying to hunt Dean down, calling him chaos incarnate. Dean & Cas get trapped in a room with no apparent means of escape or defense - probably should’ve headed for the exit - but I guess since it’s the 3rd to last episode and the execs clearly want things to go back to the status quo 🙄 now’s as good a time as any to cash in on that plot thread from last season and kill Castiel once and for all 😭 (as 1 person pointed out, given the prior context they probably could've just waited Billie out, since them being trapped in that room - Cas was the one that blocked the door anyhow - but I get it SPN showrunners you wanted to get rid of Cas somehow - what a mess)

If you haven’t watched it - here’s where I gasp and scoff in disbelief - please watch it https://youtu.be/l_r9GZeQl1w?si=uVox8PlXByYEYKci

Basically Cas tells Dean he’s the greatest guy he’s ever known, that he fights for love and that Cas lurves Dean 😭 and he’s not the bad things enemies say Dean is. That he’s more than the worst parts of himself - oh Cas.

This was Castiel’s one moment of true happiness - telling the one person whom he adores more than anyone or anything else in the entire universe - that he is loved by Castiel himself.

The confession that triggers Castiel’s demise to go with the empty, takes Billie with him and before Dean can process the massive TRUTH BOMB Castiel just dumped on him, Castiel is gone.

Despair indeed.

They made too many fucking cuts to this scene, at least for Jensen’s coverage. Like if you don’t want Dean to reciprocate…fine. Don’t. But let him fucking respond! Let him use his words. Castiel just told Dean he was in love with him, that is one of the BIGGEST things you can say to somebody in your life. EVER. Especially on TV. And yes it was in love, like romantically. Not platonically because why make such a fucking fuss over fucking platonic friendship! There’s always been a tension between these 2 characters, it hung over between them since season 4. They just made it into a joke, never expecting to get the traction it did over the years. They even tried writing Cas off the show for good back in season 7. But they got stuck with Cas and never really made proper use of him. They literally just waited until the last minute to get rid of him in a way that couldn’t get the show cancelled until that decision had already been made by the network. to make things worse - COVID happened

So don’t tell me the confession doesn’t merit a response, either for or against on Dean’s part - whether he returns Castiel’s affection or not is another story but dammit let Dean speak! How could you not? Cowards!

And Would it be so terrible if Dean did feel something MORE than friendship for the only other individual that has stood by him for so many years? Like really? A relationship doesn’t demand sex (but let’s be honest, Cas probably wanted to fuck the shit outta Dean 🤣) it’s whatever the people in the relationship want! Dean isn’t young by the time s15 rolls around. Older people tend to just want someone to come home to, settle down with. Companionship. Cas fits that to a fucking T. When Dean dreamed of a future, Cas was right there with him (and Sam, cuz Dean always wants his family close as much as he can, given how he grew up).

Couldn’t find a gif of Dean talking about taking some time off after all the craziness of the hunting they do but I’m not crazy I know he wanted it.

The team behind SPN could have finished Dean’s narrative beautifully as man who was driven by fear all his life and opens himself up to a relationship he never saw coming but when the time came he didn’t run because he grew to love more than fear (and choose to live a life of peace after stuck in one of violence for so many years).

This is why Hollywood is shit! Great beginnings, shitty endings. But in this case, it was because they consistently chose NOT to indulge in queer-like narratives with enough care (aside from some other problematic stuff like the treatment towards women being more negative than positive, the inconsistent writing for characters and plot, etc.)

BUT not when it’s the main character 😡 Charlie can be gay AF but not Dean, seriously? That’s fucked. Like at least let him fucking explore/consider it. So people stop watching it who gives AF?! I never even watched the show when it was on air for 15 years, tons of people didn’t. There are still people out there watching SPN for the first time today! People who started but stopped because it’s a show that ran WAAAY longer than any other normally does.

Idk who made it so that Dean couldn’t explore his sexuality or fucked up the Destiel of it all but they SUUUUUUUUCK! You really shat the bed! at least explore it cuz at the end of the day, it may not work out. Gay relationships aren’t that different from straight relationships in that sometimes it just doesn’t work out BECAUSE we’re ALL people. And who knows maybe they could’ve been happy but we’re not allowed to know that canonically because Destiel was never given a CHANCE!

I mean if it was REALLY that big a deal – why introduce it? By making these little suggestions that (in a way that's funny but why would Dean be queer be haha funny - no that's not okay, queerness shouldn't be a joke) furthermore we’re talking about a show on basic cable - all it would’ve taken was fucking hand-holding or the same routine of staring into each other’s eyes like they’d been doing for 12 fucking years already! Just not shying away from the queerness that time. Legend of Korra did it. That 1 Disney show did it (i don’t remember the name). No kissing would’ve been necessary - nice, wishful thinking but not necessary if the kissing became an issue (but seriously it was 2020 man but ofc - that is a year where a pandemic that required social distancing decided to kick in during the final arc of this show) - just so we’re all clear COVID cock blocked Destiel lol jk 🤣

All those times they had Dean & Cas stare into each other's eyes – the forces at work – showrunners, writers, directors AND editors & the network who is showing this to audiences – if its such a big fucking deal - Don't leave it in. By leaving it in, you're allowing people to make assumptions about the relationship – it happens literally every time in every story ever told. You put 2 people in a scene and they're not family (though not always the case) or JUST friends (explicitly proven) there's a chance SOMEONE is gonna wanna ship them no matter how likely it is (OR NOT) they'll hookup or become a couple. That's just how it is. So don't fan the flames and then turn it around on fans that they're wrong, crazy or misinterpreting. If Wincest can exist, so can Destiel and any other ship. That being said, y’all Destiel shippers were ROBBED but I don’t need to tell you that.

I don’t think the relationship would’ve been perfect or smooth sailing - their friendship as it was on the show sure wasn’t. And Dean wasn’t the only one with issues - Cas had some bad qualities too - the angel liked to lie and for a while there he was extremely averse to conflict. And Dean…he gets real fucking angry 😬 not a good mix for a relationship- hell even a friendship.

But the two had a profound bond, with a great deal of affection for one another and that’s what got them through betrayal, fights, amnesia, curses, apocalypses, and all the ugliness in between. They could’ve made it. Or they could’ve just had Cas and Dean stay friends - but we’ll never know since Cas was pretty much omitted after 15x18 - there were references - like only 2 though 😒

Really SPN? 😒😔 so lazy. But sure, go ahead, blame COVID. It’s not like phones exist. It’s not like the actor couldn’t have just recorded Castiel’s voice nope. Totally not an option 🤦🏾‍♀️ same goes for the other characters - Jody, Donna, Eileen - you know all the other characters Sam & Dean cared about but sure - fuck ‘em too. Status quo is the only thing that matters - SMH.

[tumblingxelian]

Chloe Bourgeois - Not a Typical Mean Girl

No, I am not going to sit here and talks about Chloe's family, or issues, or one writers seeming obsession with her. No!

I am here to discuss what I think is a very common misunderstanding about Chloe's character and the show in fandom that often crops up in discussion regarding her.

Namely that the thing Chloe needs most is to be chastised, rejected & punished for her mean behavior, that will sort her out!

As though that wasn't already a thing that happens?

Bear with me and I'll explain that claim first:

The school does not like punishing any students. The only reason Alya was punished for coordinating an effort to break into Chloe's locker is because Chloe threatened the principle. The only reason Marinette was almost expelled was because Lila framed her for cheating, theft & assault all in one day & she still needed to make a scene of the whole affair. There's one teacher that punishes students, but she does so unfairly, cruelly and haphazardly and in season 1, Chloe was not shown getting any special treatment from her. Special treatment from the faculty was not a thing unless we are counting later retcons.

So now that the faculty is out of the way, wat I mean is that Chloe is not a typical mean girl because she is not popular.

In stuff like Mean Girls, Heathers and so on, the usual standard is that the mean girls are mean, but they are also revered, beloved, popular in one way or another despite their horrible behavior.

This is not the case with Chloe.

Even in Season 1 where only Marinette & Nino seems to start the season disliking Chloe. (Her presence unpleasant but hardly traumatic given the Origins level bickering) Chloe was still not widely well liked by the class or school.

She had one friend in Sabrina and a second oh so briefly in Adrien, which did let her absorb some of his celebrity by proximity. But within 48 hours of having him she lost him; with Adrien becoming more distant to divorce himself from her behavior.

That's it and while one can say her haughty attitude and ego are the reason we know from season 2 she is aware everyone hates her & it upsets her.

S1-Chloe did get invited to some class events, but even then her presence was not largely welcomed with most far less prone to be patient with her than they were with others even if they exhibited similar behavior. Such as Kim bullying Ivan, or Nino expressing blatant frustration with Mylene, ETC.

By late season 2 she was pretty much entirely segregated from her peers, barring Sabrina, and her presence welcomed with shades of disinterest, disdain or outright hostility. Sometimes evoked on her part or just in general.

This is a big difference from the usual Mean Girls = Popular Girls trend but I often don't see it acknowledged in fandom discourse.

This especially feels to be the case given so often I see people arguing Chloe "needs" to be rejected, or told her behavior is bad, or that no one likes her... But she is, all the time, she is entirely aware people don't like her and unhappy about it.

The issue is not that her bad behavior is being rewarded in school. The issue is that bad behavior is what she was taught at home and what is encouraged there and what is shown to work for her parents. But it doesn't work for her and she doesn't know why, because no one really bothers to teach her why. hey just get angry and snap at her or ignore her.

& sure you can say its not her peers job to explain morality o empathy to someone who was explicitly taught by their father how to cheat at & win elections by intimidation. But the fact is no one at home is going to do so because they are modelling, encouraging & teaching the opposite up until it impacts 'them' personally.

Not sure if there's a greater point to this, but...

I often find people acting like the thing Chloe needs is for her bad behavior not to be 'rewarded' or 'indulged' by her class and to instead be 'rejected' and for her to face 'consequences'.

But she does! That's basically all she does; & When she doesn't usually an Akuma tries to murder her anyway!

So yeah, Chloe isn't a typical mean girl.

She's actually deeply unpopular among classmates and the school has a discipline issue all over, it didn't come from her.

More negativity is not going to magically make her "better".

[licorice-and-rum]

On Fascism, DEs and Dumbledore - the actual essay lol

Hey, guys! Sorry it took me so long to write this one, I really had some themes to mature before I could put all of my thoughts in writing but I finally feel like I’m ready to talk about what I want to. Before I begin, however, I want to point out a few things:

First of all, I ask all of you to enter this with an open mind because not everything I’ll say here is exactly popular opinion in the HP fandom. And, although I recognize that my perceptions and interpretations are frayed by my own background and way of thinking, my literary analysis is still based off, on some level, of academical knowledge. It doesn’t make it true, of course, but I believe it’s a solid base to have.

Second, this is, in no way, an attack on people who like the Death Eaters (Barty, Regulus, Rosier, Draco, and so on). These people are not the problem I’m talking about here because, to begin with, the characters they like are not exactly the Canon version of them, and then, because a work of fiction doesn’t determine a person’s character.

It's completely normal for popular works of fiction — and that’s especially true in Literature — to have their characters remodeled to fit a better narrative to the time they are inserted in. It happens with Fairytales, it happens with classical books — Sherlock Holmes is one of the greatest examples I can give —, it just happens. And the new interpretations are an attempt to almost self-insert: is a mirroring of our interpretations and experiences in those characters we like so much.

That said, I still have a problem with how normalized it has become in our society to make a sad backstory to fascist-like villains and that’s where I would like to start this rant/analysis. This issue is not focused on the Harry Potter characters, however: it has happened in Star Wars (both with Anakin and more recently with The Acolyte), in The Hunger Games (with Snow, although it wasn’t the intention) and many other big films/books/series in the industry.

It has a reason: we’re living through late-stage capitalism, which means capitalism is in shambles and it needs a “emergency button” of sorts, something it can use to establish some kind of control back. That’s why we’ve seen so many far-right parties win elections lately: it’s a normal thing for people to be attracted to fast and simple solutions when things are bad, even though they might not be solutions at all.

Anyway, I digress: the point is, when fascism (capitalism’s emergency button) arises, it needs to have a cultural support so that people can assimilate it better, accept it better so it can maintain itself. Don’t get me wrong: I’m not, by all means, saying that a bunch of men sat down on a white room and decided that now they would start creating Art that endorses/romanticizes fascist narratives, of course not.

This is a natural process, it happens because we, as a general rule, already lean into right wing theorical thinking by living into a capitalist mode of production. So, when capitalism collapses, many of us pull our values farthest into capitalistic mindset because that’s what we understand as secure, as stable. And this translates into art through some favored tropes or classical narratives, such as the Chosen One or the “the system is not corrupted, the people running it are” narrative.

Both of those tropes fit into the Harry Potter series in obvious ways, of course. But lately, I’ve been noticing a really particular characteristic of these narratives/tropes that are used to endorse fascism, which I believe has to do with the time period we’re at right now and who the target-audience is, and that is what I called the “individualization of narratives”.

I’m not gonna be arrogant here and say that I’m the only one who noticed this, of course not, but I haven’t found any works on that, so I’m gonna describe, in my own words, what I think this phenomenon is:

The individualization of narratives, as I call it, refers to the details some characters’ backgrounds have when they are into the “dark side”, the side that is supposed to be the fictional version of fascist-like groups. And those details — or lack thereof — are done in a way the reader can fill in the gaps in such a way to identify and empathize with them.

Again, that’s is not the problem, this happens to every character ever, it even happens with celebrities. Our brains are wired to fill in gaps in a person’s personality or character when we don’t have all the information, it’s a natural reaction. Problem is that, as it’s becoming popular to write a villain with a purpose, a “morally gray” character if you will (although I take issue with how that’s portrayed, which I’ll treat more carefully when I talk about Dumbledore), the fascist-like narratives that became so popular with post-war people, gain a new meaning.

That’s not the doing of the Art itself, it’s just a reflection of political issues that are already here but that are also perpetrated and continued by Art and material cultural production, just like anti-socialism dystopian books were in the Cold War scenario, for example. However, it’s undeniable that this movement serves a purpose, a political purpose, and that is to endorse fascism and fascist narrative. Let’s not get over ourselves here: again, this is not the evil doing of some unknown entity, it’s just a natural process of the current political climate reflecting in cultural production.

But it still serves a purpose, and what I aim to do with this essay is to demystify a bit this movement in Harry Potter. But first, we have to understand what fascism is:

Capitalism, which begun more or less in the 1600s, is a mode of production (a mold to which our society fit to work within capitalism’s needs of existence). It is based on profit, which means our society is shaped to produce that profit, everything in a society is shaped to serve this purpose, from the industry to our perception of reality — it’s all a capitalism-based ideology.

Again, reminding: that’s not a secret plot to convince people, it’s a natural process of building identity within reality. It happened in feudalism, and before that with Ancient Empires, and so on and on. There’s nothing inheritedly evil in this process.

However, capitalism is a mode of production that demands, in order to continuing to exist, more than society can provide, so it collapses from time to time. The Stock Market Crash of 1929 and the following Great Depression is one of the most striking examples of capitalism collapsing, and it’s not by happenstance that fascism arose right after this collapse.

As I said before, fascism is capitalism’s emergency button: when systems collapse, that’s where they get more vulnerable to radical change, and the extreme hardships the masses had to endure after its collapse in the 1930s could easily signify a chance for a change in the modes of production throughout the occidental countries of Europe — something that couldn’t happen if capitalism was to survive.

What I mean by bringing all this to the essay is that I want to be very clear with what fascism defends and what it means: it’s the supremacy of not only a country, or exaggerated nationalism, it is also the management and upkeeping of a society’s very structure. And, to be even clearer: that society is white, rich, and patriarchal-based.

There’s a reason why fascism is considered a white-supremacy political movement: because it defends capitalism. And capitalism was built over the need of cheap work force.

Many of you may have thought slavery when I said that, and you’d be correct.

However, with the times progression, that changed into a new form of exploration: because of the past with slavery and exploration of resources of colonized countries, it became easier — and also a natural progression from the dehumanizing of non-white communities to justify slavery — to just cheapen the work force by making non-white communities poorer, more vulnerable and more desperate to fulfill their needs.

That forces those communities — and third world countries as a whole — to accept the money and the exploration of not only first-world countries (colonizer countries) but also big corporations. I could go on and on about all the effects this policy has in non-white communities, from police brutality until the banalization of the violence in large scale (such as the Palestinian genocide) but I want to stay within the scope here.

This justification of slavery, the dehumanization of non-white peoples, is one of the main pillars of capitalism, and as such, it’s the main pillar of fascism. In Harry Potter, the intention is that those characteristics don’t present themselves in race but in blood — not that Rowling is very successful with this, considering the amount of veiled and not-so-veiled racism in her books but whatever.

Now, as I see it, Harry Potter is not a good portrayal of fascism and that has a very clear cause: Rowling’s lack of understanding of what fascism is to begin with, or how the root causes of it affect the system of the wizarding society.

As someone who have studied it, I can say that the blood purity issue wouldn’t be present only in some rich people’s minds, it would be structural to the wizarding world, in a way that would present itself in hardship for muggleborns to get jobs, in jokes that are not funny, in opinions that are degrading, in isolation and discrimination in a day to day level. And of course, there is some of it in the HP books, but it’s not treated as a structural issue — it’s treated as an individual problem.

And that’s where the real problem begins: if we treat fascism as a problem that stems from a person’s own choices instead of a political and collective movement that elevates to a highest level the structural issues that are already there, we fall into the trap of minimizing the problem because, if someone is a fascist because they’re evil, the next question to make is: why are they evil?

Currently, what we’re doing with our villains becomes a problem in these situations: in an attempt to individualize our villains, we make them human. Human in the sense that we can empathize with them, we can understand them. And, for a fascist-like narrative, that’s extremely dangerous because it makes us unconsciously start to endorse their trajectories and choices when we absolutely shouldn’t.

Fascism is not equivalent to rebelliousness.

“Oh, the good side is not so good because they treated this character bad and now he had to turn to a fascist group and decimate people because he’s traumatized.”

See how, when I say it like that, it sounds ridiculous?

But of course, you probably know that. Again, I’m not accusing people who like those characters of endorsing fascism, what I am saying, however, is that the political climate of today is doing it and it’s reflecting on our art production. What I am calling for is for people to recognize that their view of those characters as they really would be if they were anywhere near reality is not only flawed, it’s entirely wrong.

Snape, Barty Crouch Jr, Evan Rosier, Draco, Bellatrix, the Blacks as a whole — they are not the abused little teenagers who had no choice but to join the Death Eaters. They are fascists, they have always been fascists, even when they suffered. And sure, to some of them, there is more to their characters than this but the truth remains that they, in some capacity, not only endorsed a fascist narrative, they actively perpetuated it to the detriment and the suffering of marginalized peoples.

And none of them had a good, believable, and more importantly, complete redeeming arc.

Our interpretations of them are cool, I love it, I prefer them to many HP characters, to be honest. But that doesn’t change the fact that, if HP was a little bit more real, a little bit closer to reality, those characters wouldn’t be bullied teenagers forced into fascism as a means to become powerful enough to escape their abuse — as if that makes it so much better —, they’d be incels, they’d be bullies themselves.

And that’s not an opinion: we, as a fandom, tend to forget that the DEs are the ones with real societal power in the wizarding world. Most of them are purebloods, most of them are rich, most of them are friends with rich and pureblooded wizards, and they are privileged. They are not ostracized as we like to imagine, they are royalty.

For them, to fight for blood purity is to fight for their own benefit, is to fight to maintain the pillars that keep them unaccountable for their behaviors and privilege whilst at the same time, pushing marginalized people — muggleborns, fantastical creatures, even half-bloods — to a dehumanizing condition. And they don’t feel sorry for this.

Now, the truth is that this is partially Rowling’s fault: her lack of understanding of how deep the issues she’s portraying really run makes it possible for her to interpret her own characters as redeemable because they somehow exchange sides when it fits them.

That’s mostly seen with the Malfoys: neither Draco, Narcissa, nor Lucius ever change sides because they see the suffering of others and think of it as wrong. They change sides when Voldemort’s cruelty starts to weigh on them — their change of loyalties are not coming from empathy for marginalized peoples or decency, it comes from self-preservation.

Kind of the same thing with Snape (I wrote some essays focused on Snape, so if anyone is interested, here’s the first, then the second).

Now, of course, that’s not to say those characters weren’t abused on someway or suffered but that’s the thing: no abuse in the world justifies the persecution, torture and killing of innocent people. To offer a counterpoint, the marginalized peoples the Death Eaters persecuted are also traumatized in some, they also can have had abusive parents and/or families but that is not taken into account when we talk about the Death Eater’s own traumas.

The narrative that the Death Eaters were abused their whole childhoods is so strong today in fandom that most people don’t stop to think that those teenagers probably were horrible people. Yes, maybe horrible because some of them were abused, I’m not denying that, but still horrible, which means they wouldn’t accept help. To hold them responsible for their own doings and their own privileges would seem for them as a persecution against them — just like fascist-like narratives often portray pro-LGBTQ+ or non-white policies and/or narratives.

It is also one of the reasons I take issue with the Slytherin portrayal of abused kids ostracized by the rest of the school. It’s really just isolating fascist narrative and only partially based on truth but I don’t think I want to stretch this conversation now (I can write more about it later if you want though).

So no, respectfully, I refuse to accept that those people — mostly men and rich people, I am forced to point out — would be anything but disgusting, and that’s where I take issue with some behaviors within the HP fandom. Because we’re being influenced by almost two decades of fan fiction and the current political climate, it’s very often that I find people who are sincerely incapable of dissociating fandom to canon.

Hence, the actually infuriating villainization of Albus Dumbledore.

Now, that’s a topic that makes me impatient AF. Not only because it is based on a strong fetishization of who Dumbledore really was, and what he could and couldn’t do, but also because it is a clear example of most people’s inability to differentiate between what they’re reading for fun and what they are internalizing from that media.

Let’s begin with that: Dumbledore is not some evil mastermind, and he is not equivalent to Voldemort. He is a flawed character, that’s true, but he is not a villain. And to think so is to play into the narrative that, because the “good side” fails, or makes wrong decisions, or even actively makes bad decisions, or immoral decisions in times of war, that is somehow equivalent to the “bad side”.

It is not.

That narrative is the same narrative that allows Israel to build an equivalence between Hamas’ violent acts and their own when in truth, as reproachable as some Hamas’ decisions may be according to various perspectives, their violence is a reaction to heavy and even more violent oppression.

What I mean is, even if Dumbledore failed in some of his decision-making in the Harry Potter books, even if we may believe we could do better, Dumbledore is a true morally gray character. But first, to make the point I want to make, we have to understand him:

For this, I will first separate his two identities as they appear throughout Harry Potter: as the story unfolds, it becomes clear that Dumbledore plays a role as a leader and role model, but he is also a person with flaws and mistakes like anyone else. These are the two main “faces” of Albus Dumbledore for this defense post, so now let's analyze them more closely:

The first "face" we see of Dumbledore is that of the leader, and this is primarily because of Harry who, at eleven years old, sees Dumbledore as the kind of man he would like to emulate. This also happens with many other wizards throughout the story: it's clear to anyone that most of the people within Harry’s personal circle like and admire Dumbledore, while those who despise him are often the “bad” characters (Lucius Malfoy is probably one of the earliest examples of this).

Although that doesn’t mean they are somehow starstruck by the headmaster: Sirius, Snape, the Weasley parents, Moody, even James and Lily, they all question Dumbledore and his decision making at some point in the books. They end up following through more times than not, that’s true, but trust in someone is different than blind-faith. Those characters accept Dumbledore’s leadership because they trust him, not because they think he’s some type of a god.

However, we see things through Harry’s point of view, and Harry is a child who has no parents, no model figures, no one who really supports that role to him until his eleventh year. It's easy, then, to see how the leader face Dumbledore presents is one of someone the characters (and readers) can trust not to fail, and even easier to view him as someone with great power. This is the fandom’s biggest mistake in viewing him.

Shall we now remember a bit of Dumbledore’s history and delve into his personal side?

As a young man, he met Grindelwald and, according to J.K. Rowling, fell in love with him, as well as with his goal of seeking the Deathly Hallows and becoming the most powerful wizards of all time. 

In the last Harry Potter book, in the King's Cross chapter, Dumbledore himself confesses to Harry how the desire for power blinded him to what was truly important, how power was his greatest weakness, and therefore what made him unworthy of it. This is why Dumbledore remained as the headmaster of Hogwarts when he could have so easily become more important in the wizarding community (besides, of course, his love for the students): to keep himself away from power.

Here's the quote (It might be a bit different in the original, considering I’m translating it from Portuguese):

“‘I was gifted, I was brilliant. I wanted to escape. I wanted to shine. I wanted glory... Invincible Masters of Death, Grindelwald and Dumbledore!... The years passed. There were rumors about him. They said he had obtained a wand of immense power. Meanwhile, I was offered the position of Minister for Magic, not once, but several times. Naturally, I refused. I learned that I could not be trusted with power.’

‘But you'd have been better than Fudge or Scrimgeour!’ said Harry.

‘Would I?’ asked Dumbledore heavily. ‘I am not so sure. I proved as a very young man that power was my weakness and my temptation. It is a curious thing, Harry, but perhaps those best suited to power are those who have never sought it. Those who, like you, have leadership thrust upon them, and take up the mantle because they must, and find to their own surprise that they wear it well.’”

This is what the fandom most fails to understand: the admiration of wizards for Dumbledore makes him influential, but not powerful, and this becomes especially clear during the end of The Goblet of Fire and throughout The Order of the Phoenix.

One of the first signs of this in the fourth book is when Fudge refuses to believe Dumbledore about Voldemort’s return: let's remember that, until that point, Fudge sought Dumbledore’s advice for his decisions as Minister of Magic precisely because the headmaster had the respect of much of the wizarding population. But when Fudge, who has the actual power, puts his foot down and says that Dumbledore no longer has influence over the Ministry’s choices, Dumbledore lacks the power to deny it, to stop it.

If he did, it would be safe to say that he would have used his power over the Ministry to convince everyone that Voldemort had indeed returned, and more, to mobilize the Ministry against Voldemort. But none of this happens simply because Dumbledore does not have that power.

Thus, it becomes easier to differentiate power from influence.

It’s Fudge’s power that causes the Ministry as an organization and the wizarding media to turn against the Headmaster, and Dumbledore doesn’t have the power to stop it, but he has enough influence to still be heard by part of the wizarding population. It’s Fudge’s power that leads to Harry’s expulsion from Hogwarts at the beginning of Order of the Phoenix, but it’s Dumbledore’s influence that convinces the Ministry to agree to a trial, and it’s his influence that moves the people present to listen to his defense of Harry during that trial. If Dumbledore had power over these events, Harry wouldn’t even have had a trial — something the Headmaster categorically calls an absurdity.

Therefore, Dumbledore doesn’t have power; he has influence, and there’s a difference between what he can actually do and what the fandom seems to believe he can do. Dumbledore has no power over the Ministry; he can’t boss anyone around except, perhaps, the Hogwarts staff and the Order of the Phoenix, a group whose members agreed to make him leader.

What he really has are people willing to listen to his advice and thoughts, as well as inclined to follow him, but that doesn’t mean they’ll necessarily do everything Dumbledore says (Sirius, anyone?).

It’s important to separate these two concepts for this analysis to continue because it will make Dumbledore’s actions make much more sense in this discussion. That said, let’s now begin to analyze “The Life and Lies of Albus Dumbledore”:

The main criticisms I see regarding Dumbledore revolve around Harry’s life and the decisions the Headmaster made concerning him.

Before I begin, however, I want to point out that, despite Dumbledore’s flaws, he is still a leader (just like Harry), and as a leader, he bears responsibility for the lives of the people he has chosen to protect (just like Harry). It’s important to keep this in mind so that I can highlight a few things later.

So, let’s start with when the prophecy is heard and Voldemort begins hunting Harry instead of Neville. It’s important to emphasize here that, once a prophecy is made in the Harry Potter universe and the people the prophecy is about start acting according it, it’s going to happen; there’s no way around it, or at least that’s what we’re told as canon. That’s why, as soon as the prophecy is made and Voldemort actively choses to hunt them down, everyone knows that Harry (or Neville) will be the one to face Voldemort, and one of them will die — hopefully Voldemort.

Although he’s the one to whom the prophecy was made, Dumbledore has no control over it: there’s no way to avoid the fact that Harry (or Neville) would face Voldemort at some point in their lives once Snape overhears it and tells Voldemort. All he — and everyone else — can do is give the Chosen One the tools and knowledge necessary to face Voldemort with the best possible chance of winning — which he does later on by becoming Harry’s primary mentor.

Then the Potters are “chosen” and go into hiding in Godric’s Hollow, making Peter the Secret Keeper. Some more information on this choice: Dumbledore offered to be the Secret Keeper, but James and Lily refused and preferred to choose Sirius. However, they switched to Peter without telling anyone, not even Dumbledore. This is another thing I see the fandom complaining about a lot, but it’s explicitly canon that no one besides Sirius, James, Lily, and Peter knew about the switch.

This wasn’t because they didn’t trust Dumbledore, but because Albus was in the middle of the storm as one of Voldemort���s biggest targets. The Potters didn’t reject Dumbledore as their Secret Keeper because they didn’t trust him (they wouldn’t even be in the Order if that were the case, don’t you think?), but because they were thinking primarily of Harry’s safety, and placing their family’s safety in the hands of the second biggest target of Voldemort in that war simply doesn’t seem like a wise move.

So, there’s no reason, even up to the third book, for Dumbledore to suspect that Sirius is innocent and try to intervene to get him some kind of trial or chance to explain himself. There’s no indication that Dumbledore had contact with Sirius before he was sent to Azkaban, so how could the Headmaster be blamed for that?

Again, it’s important to emphasize that Dumbledore has influence.

Even if he wanted Sirius to have a trial, there’s no evidence that he could make it happen, since everything pointed to Sirius as the culprit — remembering that there’s a big difference between a trial for underage magic and the murder of thirteen Muggles, plus the whole Secret Keeper and high-profile situation. In fact, it’s also good to remember that as soon as Dumbledore learns the truth, he does everything in his power — even sending Harry and Hermione back in time — to save Sirius from being kissed by the Dementors.

But going back a bit, a week after Peter becomes the Secret Keeper, he reveals the Potters’ location to Voldemort, and on Halloween night in 1981, Voldemort goes to Godric’s Hollow and kills James, then Lily, then tries to kill Harry but fails.

This event needs to be broken down into two parts. The first is about Lily’s protection: when she chooses to die even though Voldemort gave her a chance to live, Lily protects Harry, and that’s the reason he survives that encounter with the Dark Lord, who also “dies.”

Since the fourth book, there’s a very specific characteristic of this protection that’s seen many times but never explicitly stated, which is the fact that Lily’s protection has a blood-related nature. In other words, Lily’s protection is especially tied to blood, which is why Voldemort chose Harry’s blood to resurrect himself: because in that way, he also “has” Lily’s blood and, consequently, her protection, which frees him to harm Harry in a way he couldn’t before.

And this is the point I want to reach: Dumbledore chooses the Dursleys to raise Harry not because he wants him to suffer, but because Petunia is the only one who carries Lily’s blood and, therefore, the only one who can ensure that Lily’s protection — the thing for which her sister died — continues to work. The blood Petunia shares with Lily even prevents Voldemort, even after the resurrection ritual, because her blood makes Lily’s protection even stronger.

And it’s good to remember that this measure ends up saving Harry in The Philosopher’s Stone — Quirrell and Voldemort couldn’t touch him because of Lily’s protection, guaranteed by his living in the same house as Petunia — and keeps him safe in the Dursleys’ house for sixteen years, until Harry turns seventeen and the protection finally stops working, even though he still lived with Petunia.

Once again, people overestimate Dumbledore’s ability to act: he had no control over the nature of Lily’s protection; he acted to keep Harry as safe as possible within what he could actually control.

Unfortunately, the choices presented in that situation were either to leave him protected from Voldemort’s assassination attempts or spare him the suffering of growing up with the Dursleys.

Neither choice was ideal, but this is where Dumbledore’s leadership character comes in: Harry’s responsibility to face Voldemort was no longer a choice, even though he was only a year old, because of the prophecy. So, it makes much more sense for him to protect Harry from the greater threat (Voldemort) while ensuring that Harry would have more time to develop and grow before having to face him again.

Dumbledore didn’t make the choice to give Harry to the Dursleys joyfully, wanting him to suffer, but thinking about giving him more time and more opportunities to be a child than he would have had if Lily’s protection weren’t ensured. Obviously, this doesn’t work out very well because the Dursleys are especially cruel to Harry in a way that Dumbledore hadn’t really foreseen, something he himself admits in The Half-Blood Prince:

“‘[...] Harry, whom Lord Voldemort has already tried to kill on several occasions, is in much more danger than on the day I left him on your doorstep, fifteen years ago, with a letter explaining that his parents had been murdered and expressing the hope that you would care for him as a son.’

Dumbledore paused, and although his voice remained light and calm, and did not betray his anger, Harry felt a certain coldness emanating from him. He also noticed that the Dursleys huddled together almost imperceptibly.

‘You did not do as I asked. You have never treated Harry as a son. In your care, he has only known neglect and often cruelty...’”

But it’s important to note that Dumbledore didn’t have good options regarding Harry’s custody; he didn’t have the power to change how Lily’s protection worked; he was working with what he had, which wasn’t much.

The second part of this event focuses more on Voldemort and Harry and is probably the most controversial regarding Dumbledore: the creation of the Horcrux inside Harry and how this is somehow seen as Dumbledore’s fault — hence the famous phrase about being “raised like a pig for slaughter,” but... let’s be honest? What, exactly, could Dumbledore have done against the fact that Harry became a Horcrux?

Once again, here’s the exaggerated view of Dumbledore’s power that the fandom seems to have: he had no control over what happened to the Potters in Godric’s Hollow on Halloween night in 1981. He had no power over Lily’s protection or the Horcrux in Harry. He has no power over Lily’s protection, nor over the Horcrux in Harry. The only thing he has the power to do is to act in a way that ensures his plan guarantees Voldemort’s ultimate defeat and thus saves the entire wizarding world.

I hate it when people say Dumbledore “raised Harry like a pig for slaughter” simply because he knew that Harry would have to die for the Horcrux to be destroyed, as if he had any other option in the matter. Harry’s fate was sealed as soon as Lily’s protection saved him and a part of Voldemort’s soul entered him; Dumbledore bears no responsibility for what happened that night.

So what Dumbledore can do regarding Harry having to die is exactly… nothing. He literally has no power to change this fact, no matter how much he wants to — and he does, because he loves Harry, as he himself says in Order of the Phoenix. But Dumbledore is still a leader, and he still needs to think about the best plan of action to ensure that people continue to have hope and that they can truly see that hope — of being free from Voldemort and his reign of terror — come true. And if that meant Harry had to die to destroy the Horcrux, then that was it. Period.

But it’s also important to point out that Dumbledore didn’t force Harry into anything: by the time Harry receives the information that he needs to die to ensure the salvation of everyone and Voldemort’s mortality, all the people who know this — Dumbledore and Snape, in this case — are dead and unable to do anything if Harry decided to simply run away and leave everyone to fend for themselves because he didn’t want to die.

But, as I pointed out before, Harry is a leader. And he fully accepts the responsibility of this role the moment he decides to face death: he goes to Voldemort willing to die by his own choice, wanting to save those who matter to him, those who trust him to end Voldemort. Not because Dumbledore ordered him, but because he — Harry — is a leader, and a leader sacrifices himself for his cause when necessary.

Saying that Dumbledore was the “cause” of Harry’s death, besides being wrong, also takes away from the greatness of Harry’s choice in that situation. Harry is the protagonist of his own story, and he is always making decisions based on his own mind and beliefs (going after the Philosopher’s Stone, entering the Chamber of Secrets, sparing Pettigrew, going after Sirius in the Department of Mysteries, pursuing the Horcruxes, etc.), so it’s completely unfair for people to place the responsibility for his choice to die on Dumbledore’s shoulders just because the Headmaster gave him the information that Harry was a Horcrux. Harry always acted according to his own mind based on the information he had been given — why would it be any different with the Horcrux inside him?

It simply wouldn’t be. Dumbledore gave the information, but it was Harry who decided what to do with it.

Furthermore, it’s worth noting that Dumbledore didn’t tell Harry about having to die to destroy the Horcrux inside him earlier because (a) Harry was a child, and (b) Dumbledore didn’t want to take away Harry’s hope. Additionally, after the fourth book, there was still the possibility that Harry could survive because, by performing the resurrection ritual, Voldemort intertwined his life with Harry’s, thus giving Harry a chance not to die when allowing the Horcrux to be destroyed. So why would Dumbledore tell a teenager that he would have to die at some point in the future… if there was a chance Harry might come back? It seems (to me, at least) like an unnecessary cruelty to place that burden on someone for so long.

So the biggest issue I see with the fandom in relation to Dumbledore is the belief that he had power over things that were completely beyond his reach. Dumbledore was a leader doing the best he could with what he had, within the limitations presented to him and his own experience.

Moreover, it’s admirable that Dumbledore had such a dark and flawed past and acknowledged each of his mistakes, always acting to ensure that he wouldn’t repeat them. It was the events of his adolescence that led him to always remember to value what truly mattered: love and people. He grew through his own pain, through the consequences of his own mistakes; he never forgot or repressed what happened to Ariana — which would certainly have been much easier — but instead, he used that painful event to become a better person.

That’s a morally gray character, that’s someone who had been stuck between a rock and a hard place and did what he thought was best, that’s a character who did the best he could with what he was given. And I really don’t like how fascist-like characters are more often than not considered more complex because of trauma than characters like Dumbledore.

But I guess that’s a bit because we can actually empathize with them better by being convinced that they didn’t have a choice, or that they were somehow forced into those choices even if they really didn’t want to and that might be the case, but to be honest, after seeing what fascist narratives do to marginalized people, I can’t say I care much about it. Anyway, be my guest to comment on my analysis but please be kind, I won’t engage in rage baits nor Zionists, Free Palestine loves <3

[madmaxified]

dc super hero girls ( 2019 ) swap au because I have no self control. it’s essentially just a role swap of the villain group and the hero’s ( and batman with the joker, mostly for narrative )

the hero ( formerly villain ) group themselves are INCREDIBLY unorthodox, mostly because none of them other than harleen and selina ever wanted to do something for other people before, they were mostly using their powers for selfish reasons ( not evil ones, just for personal gain ) so even though they’re all learning to be better people they’re not super well liked by the general public because of their destructive and frankly dangerous methods ( mostly adults hate them, other teenagers think they’re the coolest ) they’re referred to as vigilantes more rather than actual heroes

harleen swaps with babs, she still retains her canon personality she’s less apathetic, and genuinely cares deeply for a lot of her friends. she still loves playing pranks and practical jokes, but she’s less rowdy and rambunctious in the beginning, especially when she meets new people, mostly because she’s now really worried about making a good impression and not getting into too much trouble. rather than her dad taking a new job in metropolis, harleen got expelled from gotham high for playing a big prank ( it’s a running gag that no one but babs knows what it was ) and her dad was so pissed that she got kicked out of the only high school in gotham that he kicked her out. she lied about her address to her address to get into metropolis high, and she’s really trying her best to do well in school, and like diana was in canon, she was kinda just homeless for a bit. since the joker is a superhero in this universe, harley quinn ( a superhero name the others poke fun at sometimes because of how obvious it is ) is a crime fighting vigilante

selina swaps with diana, she isn’t an amazonian or anything ( that’s still diana ) but instead she’s more of a robin hood type character pre canon. she’d steal from banks or take valuables and sell them on the black market and give the money to people and families who need it, which isn’t an amazing tactic, but her intentions were good. she didn’t have any real interest or intention in starting a superhero group or actually fighting any crime before harleen brings up the idea, but she has been keeping a close eye on a couple girls ( pam, leslie, doris, carol ) at school that she thinks might have superpowers. once the group is formed she is the leader, mostly because she has the most battle iq / experience. like diana, she is the one leading the main training in the beginning, and though she’s the elected ‘leader’ she’s not really the mom of the group. she does care deeply about her team though, and she does try her best to keep them safe. she’s the least destructive member of the team because of how practiced she is at sneaking in and out of places without getting caught but she’s one of the most disliked because of catwoman’s already existing presence pre show, her intentions were good, but robbing banks is bad

the rest of the girls are less obvious swaps, it’s mostly just the villains are now heroes and the heroes are now villains

leslie is the more tech savvy one ( like karen ) she’s actually super smart which comes as shock to people based on her punk looks ( she hates when people say she doesn’t look like she’d enjoy math or science ) she’s not a bully anymore, instead, like kara she’s more sarcastic and just pokes fun at people, though it she takes it too far with people she cares about she’s very quick to apologize. she’s the one who is put under ra’s’ spell ( she’s still super punk guys OF COURSE she loved the league of shadows ) and her lighting gets all red and stuff and she looks super cool. she’s actually part of school newspaper, since she’s nicer, she doesn’t run a gossip column ( though she’s constantly BEGGING lois to let her start one ) she’s instead a field reporter, who always manages her to somehow get the inside scoop and really good pictures ( she’s hiding out the in tech guys ) also her and doris are one hundred percent going out

doris is more the mom of the group, she’s no longer a bully and instead uses her strength to defend people she cares about / beat the shit out of people she doesn’t like, she gets in trouble a lot because she’s constantly beating up kids at school who make fun of pam. her and pam are really close because their parents are both scientists and they grew up hanging out at labs together. both of them were experimented on by their parents, and have been aware of eachothers powers for a while. she’s super over protective of the others in the group, mostly pam ( because they’re basically sisters ) leslie ( cause they’re going out ) and harleen ( because harleen’s always putting herself into harms way ) she’s quite literally the type to just grab her friends and walk away with them tucked under her arms if she feels that something isn’t safe, despite their protesting. she’s the world’s biggest man hater ever, she gets pissed off so much if a guy says something misogynistic to her or her friends, her powers act ho so much it’s not even funny

carol is still the overemotional one of the group, though it’s mostly because her ring is more connected to strong emotions rather than love, but because she still not super sure how to control her ring yet ( none of the others really know what to do either so they’re all just trying their best ) so whenever her friends, or anyone else around her frankly, are feeling something really strong it effects her pretty deeply. she’s not obsessed with hal, though they are still exes, but him being a shitty boyfriend is one of the reasons she became so intune with her ring in the first place. she’s like the opposite of a therapist friend, in the sense of she’s a friend constantly trying to give therapy but also needs it more than anything. her and thaal are the definition of ‘twink and in denial lesbian’ friendship ( and she totally doesn’t dump to him about how hot she thinks lois lane is, even if she is trying to uncover the identities, they’re essentially this aus barry and babs ) she’s still a hopeless romantic, and is constantly gushing to the others about her ‘dream’ guy ( and theyr all like ‘carol you dumb lesbian my god!’ )

pam is basically the same, other than the fact that she’s less inclined to use her powers, mostly because she’s scared to. she really only goes into poison ivy form when she desperately needs to photosynthesize and when she’s either completely alone or with doris. her parents exterminated on her when she was little, and because of that fact that they literally turned her into a walking plant she’s completely incapable of eating plants ( people just think she has a weird medical condition ) though she’s still anti social, she does quite enjoy the company of a select few people. when she does finally agree to join the others in becoming a super hero, she really only does it / participates in certain crimes to try and help the environment. it isn’t until she and harley come face to face with batgirl that she finally starts using her powers to actually fight. she’s also less anti social, she still doesn’t have many friends, but it’s mostly because she’s shy and not because she doesn’t want them ( her and karen have basically swapped personalities ) she’s very much the sweetest member of the group ( leslie, doris and her are literally simon, alvin and theodore )

diana is a lot more like her aunt antiope, she spent a lot more time with her as a child and so she’s a lot more reckless and carefree. she doesn’t really care that much about her teammates, and to her they’re really just pawns she uses to achieve her goals and help her have a good time. she’s still new to metropolis, having just arrived at the time of the first episode, but rather than wanting to protect the world of man, she instead just wants to cause problems, have fun and possibly grow rich. antiope sent her the the human world willingly, because in this universe she’s the older sister and is the queen of the amazonians, rather than diana’s mom. she’s less academic and way more sporty, a trait she’s picked up from her aunt since she never really had to study when she was younger. diana is incredibly manipulative in this au, almost every member of her group was manipulated into joining by her, and it continues as long as they remain part of the group

( bonus : the episode #thewarriorandthejester plays out basically the same, including diana figuring out harleen is harley quinn. during nightmare in gotham diana is present, and when harley’s tied up on the roof she reveals to babs that harleen is harley )

babs’ dad is still commissioner gordon, but she instead idolizes batman, and since batman’s a bad guy in this universe, so is babs ( she’s just extra careful about keeping her identity a secret ) like in canon, babs is extremely hyperactive, but in this universe it’s a lot more unchecked. since harleen forced herself to learn how to tone down and not always draw attention to herself in fear of getting kicked out again, her babs’ energy doesn’t match eachother’s as well as it used to. babs lacks a filter, so she’ll often just say what she doesn’t like about someone to their face, which is one of the reasons harleen’s new friends don’t like her as much. batgirl is a lot meaner in this universe, she’s rude, and blatantly makes fun of people, particularly harley ( cough … the reason pam gets so worked up and uses her powers in a fighting sense … cough ) while out of the costume harleen still is the more overprotective one ( she still would willingly kill for babs ) babs is the one who often goes to extreme measures to make sure the other is happy 

zee is somewhat of an accidental villain, she used dark magic one time on accident ( she caused the gremlins to spew out of ace of spades a lot earlier on ) and diana, who witnessed this, pressured her into jointing her villain group, claiming it would help her ‘learn to control her dark magic better’ ( spoiler alert, it doesn’t ) while zee enjoys the freedom and publicity being a villain brings her, she really doesn’t enjoy using her dark magic, because she has no idea how to control it, she avoids using it most of time, because when she does use it, things get chaotic and very out of hand. she’s still the most popular girl in school out of costume, but she’s a lot less nice ( she’s stereotypical mean girl core and I’m sorry ) she’s a lot less open and kind as she is in canon, even to her friends, she’s a total asshole to everyone but especially to her friends 

karen is a little wet rat in this universe, she was tired of being called small and weak and being picked on, so she built the bumblebee suit with the intention of getting revenge, but even with the broken growth tech diana still recruited her to her team, karen being the only one she didn’t have to manipulate in some way. she used to be incredibly shy, and while she’s still anti social ( her and pam have kind of swapped personalities ) she’s just rude now, and thats why she doesn’t have many friends. she’s a little wet rat and will a hundred percent bite you. she’s still constantly fix her growth tech, but she also refuses to let any of her team mates help her. basically all of them besides diana and maybe jessica like hate her because she’s so rude to them all of time and never follows any of their plans and just does her own thing half the time, but diana won’t listen to them when the tell her to kick karen off the team

jessica doesn’t want to be a villain, she definitely doesn’t enjoy it, like zee and literally every but karen, she was manipulated by diana to joining the team. like pam in canon, most of her motives for doing literally anything villain related is when she sees or hears about social injustices that she wants to fix. she does believe in fighting in this universe, she doesn’t love it, but she thinks that the only way to deal with social injustices is to use violence to punish people. in this universe, her fears of not being good enough for the green lantern core got the best of her and she ran off, quitting and instead taking up a yellow ring ( thaal still has his green ring in this au ) she’s a lot less of a social butterfly, she still uses school as a place to voice abut problems around metropolis, but because she’s a lot more self conscious the negative response get to her a lot more. she’s no longer like “I don’t know the meaning of the words leave it alone” and more just “oh … okay I’ll stop 😞” she’s still one who tries befriend pam, and they’re still adorable and probably dating. she also needs a hug asap

kara became a villain because she was really jealous of super man ( he’s still a hero in this universe ) and diana used that against her. she started out trying to be a hero but literally no one cared and they all called her destructive so diana was like “become a villain and then you can beat up your cousin mwa ha ha” and she was like “that sounds dope I’m in” when zod shows up, she still helps defeat him, because she still wants to be a hero deep down, she wants to help people, but diana won’t let any of them leave her villain group. she does try to help people whenever she thinks diana isn’t looking, and she always tries desperately not to hurt people when they’re pulling off heights or schemes. she’s still destructive and thinks punching things is a solution to everything mostly because diana tells her that it’s a great idea to do that, and so she’s never really learned any other way to deal with problems

lena and lex swap, so he’s the little rat child and she’s the super genius billionaire asshole. people don’t love lena as much as they do lex in canon mostly because she’s still a bit of a brat. she’s still beloved and held to a super high regard but people are also like “she’s also super fucking weird and is like a rat” she also has a keytar because fuck it ricky owens reference. so when she’s fighting with the girls instead of some weird dance she’s like putting on a little concert for them. most of her robots that need to be manually controlled have a piano as the control piano, so when lex is fighting the girls in the beginning he’s just slamming his hands on random keys and hoping it works 

barbi still starts out a villain, she’s jealous that harleen became captain of the gymnastics team and was like “magic is the only solution fuck it” her and selina are exes but it’s so obvious they have not gotten over eachother at all ( “why’d she break up with you selina?” “it was over something stupid - I stole from her” “that’s a really good reason to dump you” ) cheetah is still a villain until around after the girls fight when lena because she was captured and then like immediately let her out and selina like was begging her to be a good guy with them, she late becomes an honorary member of the team. while she was captured she was in the tube next to selina and the whole time selina was like “barbi I’m sorry please take me back 😭”

the joker and batman swap so babs is the one who idolizes a villain and harleen idolizes a hero. the hive five also swap with the teen titans

dexter is literally the same except selina is the one who works at the animal shelter and is the one who adopts him

[joesalw]

i feel like an ex-mormon even talking about this but like, i kinda need to say it out loud;i started listening to her around 1989, and i liked her songs, i liked the general sense of innocent and confused teenhood that transpired from her songs, but only got really into her music with lover (didnt like reputation when it came out although years later it kinda grew on me). i was mind-blown by folklore and evermore, obsessed with her for the next couple years, and then midnights came out. i didn't NOT like it but lets just say i was disappointed, it was underwhelming and chaotic. anyway this was the period i started not giving a shit about her in general, what with the private jets (i just discovered she owns 2?????? why would you need a private jet is one question but why would you need TWO is a wholly different one) and how her persona felt so blatantly merchified more and more with each release. i felt kinda disturbed when it ended with joe, like i was scared for him, knowing her fanbase and imagining just how messy it has to be breaking up with the biggest pop star right now after you dated for six years. then, over the following year i started feeling more and more annoyed by her. her pathological need for public attention really showed when she started dating that idiotic handegg player, becoming a billionaire, times person of the year, her concert being shown in cinemas (cinemas!!! good lord please at least at the movies could you please spare me from hearing about her), and just how… shitty she was being in general. she didn't say a thing about the incoming elections (not that i care for biden but come on a word or two on the fact that trump is literally a criminal would have been the bare minimum from her) and most importantly she didn't say a word on the genocide. not even the bother to say the most generic ass take like "viOleNcE iS aLwAYs WroNg!!!!". to my knowledge, to this day she hasn't said a word about the whole situation. its like she lives in this dreamland made only of fairytales and PR stunts where everyone is her diligent servant and she always gets whatever she wants. also ttpd sucked two dicks and i can't believe there's people listening to it unironically after two songs i couldn't bear it anymore already. now i just feel kinda bad in general, recently my cousin gave me 1989 in vinyl for my birthday and i didn't know how to tell her "yeah i don't care for her that much anymore" so I just smiled and accepted it. the worst thing is it's literally the standard edition!!!! on a double LP!!!! each side is like three songs, half of it is just empty grooves. thank god i never gave her a cent personally, I only pirate cause I refuse to pay for spotify, but I still feel bad knowing I took the effort to download 300 songs of an artist and now I don't even know if ill wanna listen to any of them ever again.

!!

[emmafreakecreations]

When ever I think about Rhys saying "Both sides did bad things." It just reminds me so much of Americans who like to wave away that the confederates in the Civil War were fighting to keep slavery and/or spew The Lost cause Mythology.

For those of you who are not American or maybe never learned this but the Lost Cause mythology is basically lies and rewriting of history that confederates did themselves starting soon after the end of the war to mask their true intentions of the war. Things like, "it was all about slave rights and taxes! The north was being aggressive; during Sherman's march they burned, pillaged, and raped! Slavery wasn't actually that bad and if anything black people needed it!" All of it lies. The real reason they succeeded from the Union was slavery; they wanted to keep slavery and expand it into future states. They wanted to keep it so bad they written it into the confederacy constitution. The fight over slavery started very soon after the revolution ended and then built and built with every compromise on which new states would be free states and which would be slave, the rise in abolitionism, and more laws making it harder for slaves to escape. It exploded when Lincoln was elected President. He wasn't even inaugurated and states had already succeeded. The founding fathers didn't do anything about it because a) some owned slaves b) they believed it would die out because it was expensive, it became super profitable once the cotton gin was invented.

And while the Union initially wasn't fighting for the end of slavery but to keep the union, it only turned to ending slavery because Lincoln recognized as the only way to keep the US together and the Union soldiers who marched through the South who had never been there before saw how awful slavery was and wanted to end it. Yes General Sherman lead a campaign in the South and burned things but the things he burned (from my understanding) were the plantations and a few cities. Slaves who had escaped followed the union army as they moved through the south. I even learned that some point some union soldiers killed the dogs of a plantation that the owner used to hunt down escaped slaves and let his slaves beat him. I'm not going to deny that there probably was stealing and rape happening but there was also reports of confederates stealing too.

The point I'm trying to make is that while the Union wasn't perfect you also can't ignore the fact that the other side was fighting for slavery. That's why it feels similar, both Rhys and some people say, "that side did bad things too." while completely ignoring the fact the other side was fighting to keep the right of enslaving human beings and keeping them like cattle. And in the case of the humans of ACOTAR they were fighting for their freedom as some black union soldiers were fighting for theirs and the rest who were still enslaved.

Feel free to correct me on my facts about the Civil War, it's really only in recent years that historians are trying to fight against the years of lies the Lost Cause created in the American public's conscience. Like it is so pervasive that in the 21st century media has 3 vampire characters that fought on the side of the confederacy and paint them as not that bad. Vampire Diaries in a later season had an episode explaining that Damon didn't want to fight in the confederacy he only did it because his dad forced him. And the only one who questions and confronts Bill in True Blood is Tera and her white friend tells her to stop being rude. Abraham Lincoln vampire hunter is the only one I have seen making wealthy plantation owners vampires and the bad guys. If you want know more about the American Civil war check out Atun-Shei Films and his series called checkmate, Lincolnists on YouTube. He goes through a lot of misconceptions and lies about the civil war while being very honest, down to earth, level headed, and not show favor towards the union or confederacy because he does also talk about each of their faults.

[baronfulmen]

It's only March and I am already losing patience with the "if you vote for Biden you're a bad person" bullshit

I am going to explain this one more time (lie, I will explain it like a hundred more times but probably more pissy each time)

The way the electoral college works, there is NO viable way for a third party candidate to win.

You could REPLACE one of the existing parties in theory, but more likely you would just change the party until you like it more.

This is done starting at the local level, which is also where third party candidates can actually win. Despite this most people totally ignore everything but the presidential election and then bitch about it.

You could fix our elections by working to eliminate gerrymandering and voter suppression and by fighting for ranked choice voting, but again that's not a thing that's going to happen all at once (or ever in an election year).

Biden is awful, duh. All US presidents have been awful. They have all committed war crimes and if hell were real there would be a special section just for US presidents. Yes even whichever one you think was okay, Carter or whoever.

Biden's administration has done a TON of good shit, alongside the bad. No I'm not saying the bad stuff was worth it, I'm just saying it is not all bad stuff which is important because Trump really is basically all bad shit. All of it. He's all the bad shit that comes with Biden AND so so so much more.

Not voting doesn't send a message, because voter turnout is already abysmal and so your protest non-vote is lost in a sea of apathetic non-votes and Republican generated lack of votes due to voter suppression.

Not voting doesn't somehow make you a more virtuous person, nor does voting for Biden make you a bad person even though he's a bad person. You have two options, Biden or Trump. That's it. Not voting is still making a choice, and that choice will STILL RESULT IN EITHER TRUMP OR BIDEN so you might as well be a fucking adult about it and acknowledge that one is less bad than the other.

There are some states that are so OVERWHELMINGLY certain to go to a particular candidate that it's harmless to vote third party, but I have frequently seen people on this site say that applies to them and then mention where they live and it's ABSOLUTELY not one of those places so I don't know what some of you are smoking. Florida, for christ's sake.

I get that a lot of you want to start the bloody revolution or whatever, but please understand that even if you're serious and actually plan on doing that there's no reason you can't ALSO vote.

This isn't that complicated. Grow up and vote for Biden, and be angry and bitter about it the whole time. Work towards change in ways that actually matter and have a chance of making a difference, instead of sitting back and smugly acting like doing nothing makes you a better person you fucking cowardly assholes.

[sicklyseraphnsuch]

Can you write about Fionna, seeing the Simon petrikov of her world?

"Woah, wait what? There's a university nearby? Since when?"

Marshall shrugs. "Since forever?"

Gary blinks. "Marshall, you graduated from college?"

Marshall smacks him on the arm. "What's that supposed to mean?"

Gary smiles as charmingly as he can. "Well, I mean... With your lifestyle..."

"I seem like an uneducated boor?" Marshall grins with just a hint of menace. "And you would be right. I never graduated. Mom made me take a bunch of business classes that I hated with every fiber of my being. So I dropped out."

Fionna blinks. "How come I never knew this about you? We've been friends since... since..."

Actually, if Fionna tries to think about when they became friends, her memories get a little foggy. Marshall crosses his eyes as if experiencing the same thing. This must be one of the side effects of their world technically being only 12 years old and at the same time much much older than that. Fionna is not 12 years old but neither can she concentrate on anything that happened before 12 years ago. It's... just a little unsettling, if she thought about it for long enough.

So, she does the tried and true method of simply not thinking about it too much. In the same way, she won't think about how it's completely novel to learn about nearby cities as if other cities didn't exist until very recently, like maybe even right now. It's whatever. She's learning about it now, and that's that.

"I... do remember..." Marshall murmurs softly, as if tugging on a particularly stubborn weed. "I snuck in an elective that Mom would have hated. It was about like Mothman and the Loch Ness monster."

"They teach you that in college??" Fionna gasps, her eyes going starry.

"Eh... It wasn't specifically about them but it was about folk lores and folk songs in general. I really loved the professor that taught it. She described like cryptids and encounters of the third kind in this really poetic, almost romantic way. It was kinda weird and like really cool at the same time. What was her name? Petrikov? Petrova? Petri-something..."

Everything in Fionna stops. She can no longer hear Marshall speaking. Because there's no way. There's no way!! Nothing outside of this city - which she knows like the back of her hand - has existed until literally someone "remembers" it exists. Their world is balancing on the knife's edge of already born and currently being made. And now there's a Petrikov here? What? WHAT?!?

Gary gently taps her arm. "Um, Fionna? You in there?"

Fionna grabs Marshall by the front of his shirt. "You have to introduce me to... her? Professor Petrikov is a woman??"

Marshall squints at her, looking markedly more intent. "Yeah. She is."

Fionna should probably note the terrible emphasis in Marshall's tone just now. But her mind is whirling with implications. Simon is here? She has a Simon in her world? A Simon specifically for this world? Holy schmazow.

Gary tilts his head, observing his boyfriend in a way that Fionna is simply unequipped to presently.

"You're... protective of her. That's kinda sweet."

As always, when faced with evidence of his sentiment, Marshall curls into himself, shrugging it off as casually as he can. "I mean, it's just you know... She's a really great professor. I learned a lot from her."

Then as if rousing himself from sleep, a certain awareness enters his eyes. Fionna catches that and wonders if a new part of their world - their shared lore - was just made.

"Yeah, actually you know what... The semester that I took her class, that's when I started playing around with songwriting. She inspired me to look into poetry more. And after her class ended, I dropped out." Marshall nods to himself, kicking back with that patented bad boy smirk. "I've been a vagabond ever since."

Gary rolls his eyes at him. "Some vagabond you are, crashing on my couch."

Marshall winks at him. "You'd be lonely."

Fionna raises a hand. "Let's get back to Professor Petrikov. Can you like introduce us?"

Marshall turn, losing some of his sass as he focuses on her. "I mean yeah. I've been meaning to visit."

Fionna feels her smile stretch so wide, her cheeks begin to hurt. "Road trip!!!"

[baxterstockmanisthecenterfold]

how many versions of Claddia do you have

Eh I think like 6 or 7. Y'all already met her 2012 version. But I've put her in other iterations too. Keep in mind tho, all of my Claddia's are in the process of being redesigned & updated. Starting with cartoons.

(old design on left)

This version of her was originally Korean because when I was first creating her in general, I didn't know if I wanted Claddia to be black or Asian. But I decided on black for other versions since there's a lack of said race in TMNT in general. Although I've since then redesigned her & made her black since it just doesn't make sense to racebend her at all really & I definitely want to avoid the assumption that she isn't black here because 80s Baxter wasn't. As for her role in this incarnation she has a history with Baxter. The two were really close friends & science colleagues in their college years plus (maybe even more) but lost contact after Claddia moved out of New York, to continue her research. Granted she would eventually return to the big Apple especially to reconnect with Baxter. Unfortunately by this point in time he had already been mutated & it's basically a Simon & Betty situation with them especially since she'd later try to cure him & restore his memory even at the cost of her own normal life.

In the 2003 cartoon. She's a member of the EPF & Agent Bishop's right hand woman & the original leading scientist until Baxter was recruited after the Exodus arc. To put it bluntly. The two hate each other & are constantly budding heads especially regarding the other's IQ & overall importance on even being here. They do eventually start to grow a bit of respect for one another & become frenemies at most.

(old design on left)

Once again as y'all noticed, she's in the 2012 series. This version of her is an inventor & scientist that doesn't take crap from anybody (as much as it bites her in the ass). She's also really egotistical & even short tempered. She met Baxter through coincidence as she's also had a bad run in with the turtles, & pretty much bonded & became close since then. Acting as a black cat gf to his golden retriever bf. It also helps that she knows how to fight without technology helping her.

In the Rise series she's pretty much a successful scientist & took Baxter's usual role as untrustworthy celebrity as she was secretly kidnapping & using mutants for her own purposes even teaming up with Baron Draxum in the process. But she's not one bit of a pushover & has backup plans for backup plans on how to screw over people. After the events of "The Mutant Menace" she bailed out Baxter & took him under her wing as her apprentice/mentee forming a little mother & son relationship.

In the Comics.

(soon to be updated design)

In the mirage universe, Claddia's a science nerd & huge fan of Baxter & even still remained loyal to him even AFTER what he did with his mousers & his terrorist stunt. It eventually led to her visiting him in prison & even helping him escape, secretly conspiring together & her falling in love with him as well. She also played a hand in his eventual break in to the DARPA facility for his robot rampage. Unfortunately, Stockman was only using her the whole time to succeed in his goals & betrayed & killed the poor woman.

Finally, in the IDW continuity she once again works for the EPF & is Bishop's top scientist. She's very different from most of the previous versions as she is pretty timid & just sticks to doing what she's informed to. As for her relationship with Baxter. She's once again a big fan of his work as a scientist & soon to be Mayor. Although two only met briefly when Baxter met with Bishop. Something that MIGHT change in her re-write. Tho one thing is the same. She was there in person the night of his election victory, including being in mutagen bomb distance

Yes Claddia does get mutated in 3 of these continuities. No I can't share them yet because I want to redesign em a bit & also because I'm at the photo limit & I don't feel like retyping all of this on desktop so I can do the more than 10 limit. But uh yeah. That's Ms. Brackston for y'all.

[president-habit]

LOOK, WHAT HAVE YOU GOT TO LOSE? THE COUNTRY IS GOING TO HELL ALREADY, WHY NOT HAVE ME IN CHARGE? YOU REALLY GONNA TELL ME I'M A WORSE OPTION THAN THE TWO CLOWN CORPSES RUNNING FOR OFFICE RIGHT NOW?

JUST THINK OF IT THIS WAY; WOULD YOU RATHER HAVE ANOTHER 4 YEARS OF A GUY FORGETTING WHERE HE IS AND SNIFFING KIDS HEADS, 4 YEARS OF A GUY WEARING A SQUIRREL FOR HAIR WHO IS CONVINCED A WALL WILL FIX ANYTHING, OR 8 TO ∞ YEARS OF A STUD LIKE ME?

NOW I KNOW WHAT YOU'RE THINKING, "HABIT, WHAT ARE YOU EVEN PUTTING ON OFFER? AREN'T YOU A BAD PERSON? BLAH BLAH BLAH-" FUCK YOU, I CAN BE A GENEROUS CANDIDATE! JUST THINK:

- BIRTH CONTROL AND ABORTION WILL NOT ONLY BE A PROTECTED RIGHT, BUT ENCOURAGED. FUCK THEM KIDS, SEND EM' STRAIGHT TO HELL!

- LEGALIZING NOT ONLY WEED IN EVERY STATE, BUT ALL DRUGS IN EVERY STATE. WHY, YOU ASK? SO THAT AMERICA CAN BE THE FIRST COUNTRY TO HOLD THE CRACKHEAD OLYMPICS. EVERY ATHLETE CAN TAKE AS MANY DRUGS AS THEY WANT, LETS SEE HOW FAST A PERSON CAN REALLY RUN!

- I WILL REMOVE ALL MORAL SAFEGUARDS ON SCIENTIFIC RESEARCH. YOU CAN'T LEARN MORE WITHOUT COMMITTING A COUPLE OF ATROCITIES ALONG THE WAY. I EXPECT TO SEE HORRIBLE RAT-HUMAN HYBRIDS WITHIN 5 YEARS OF MY ELECTION.

- WE WILL NUKE JAPAN EVERY 50 YEARS. TWO BOMBS GAVE US HENTAI, WE, THE AMERICAN PEOPLE, NEED TO KNOW WHAT NEW HORRORS WILL COME AFTER NUKING THEM AGAIN. DOES 3 BOMBS EQUAL REAL GIANT GUNDAMS? LET'S FIND OUT TOGETHER!

I'VE EVEN GOT STRETCH GOALS FOR YOU GUYS!

- A SATELLITE LASER ARRAY CONSTANTLY REFLECTING SUNLIGHT INTO VINNIE'S EYES

- ANNEXING MEXICO AND RENAMING IT SOUTH AMERICA

- ANNEXING SOUTH AMERICA AND RENAMING IT SOUTHER SOUTH AMERICA

- STARTING A COLONY ON THE MOON WHERE THEY WILL BE GASLIT INTO THINKING IT'S 1985 STILL

- PUTTING TRUMP INTO A TRUMAN SHOW SITUATION WHERE HE'S "TOTALLY THE PRESIDENT"

- SOYLENT GREEN

- STARTING MK ULTRA BACK UP AND GIVING THEM DOUBLE THE AMOUNT OF HOOKERS AND COCAINE

- SENDING CHILDREN BACK TO THE MINES WHERE THEY BELONG. LOOK, THEY ALREADY LOVE MINECRAFT, IT'S CLEAR THEY MISS HAVING BLACK LUNG AND A LOWER THAN AVERAGE AMOUNT OF LIVING FRIENDS.

[fandom-hoarder]

911 8x06

Last week, before I could watch the new 911 ep, some people on my dash spoiled me with untagged spoilers and I literally started crying. Because the way people were talking about it made it sound like there was biphobia from Tommy and a cheating storyline, and that supposition sparked my election depression--- was this an alternate ending based on election results? (a WILD assumption, i kept telling myself; nevertheless, the doomerism persisted); a sign of queer suppression in media in the coming regime? biphobia in general, which is so enraging as a bi person?

And, to be clear, these thoughts and worries are not Hen/Karen erasure. They're literally my favs. But it IS about the way bisexuality is often treated, both in media and irl, as if you have to choose one way to be. As if bisexuality is some sort of schrodinger's sexuality.

It turns out my extreme anxiety over it wasn't completely warranted, at least from my pov as a writer. But it took me a few more days to actually level out and watch it clear headed.

So before the new one airs, here's my copy/paste from my dm a few days ago to @supernaturalkickparty 😅

I gave in and started the 911 ep. I'm CACKLING at the end of the urn Omg. *Abby* I... ok i can see a straight line to breakup from this, but I'll have to see how it plays out Omg the next case is about divorce Josh is really cute in this ep Josh's speech has me verklempt Istg they just better not erase buck's bisexuality Omgodddddd we are NOT sending another little kid down lmfao this is gonna make me cry Goddd 😭😭💜💜 God. This is gonna hurt. God. Whyyyyyyy. God whyyyy does it have to be THIS "Believe me, I didn't see it coming either." GODDDDDDD I'm just so fucking glad it wasn't a breakup over cheating Eddie lmfao I'm so glad the mustache is gone😂😂 Lmfao omfg eddie opens the door to buck and he's in his underwear???? This is the fucking start of a fic. No wonder the buddies are being insufferable God please don't let buck's rebound be a girl. Just please. Please. Don't make it be all girls now :(((((

Anyway, I can see a decent resolution to this, and I'm hopeful it will go as well as I usually think of this show's storytelling---which is to say I think 911 does a pretty good job of weaving meaningful character arcs that tie in a bow by the end.

And even though I am still marginally worried about whether buck's bisexuality will be fulfillingly handled, I don't necessarily think this breakup is bad. Buck's thing is breakups as character growth; and while I did think that we were moving past that in his coming of age arc growing into maturity, and as much as I love bucktommy, I didn't really expect Tommy to be his last or for a breakup to be completely off the table. I expected one eventually, and not for buddie reasons.

I don't even really ship buddie in canon, or see an inevitable queer storyline for eddie (though i do love buddietommy, but y'all already know i always think there should be an ot3); I just figured there would be typical buck drama, and hey... I settled down and figured this is that.

And also... like, yes it's frustrating that Tommy broke it off because of the whole "i'm the only guy you've ever been with," but like...that expectation that Buck will end up breaking his heart isn't really bad writing. I wish there'd been more LEADUP to it (I still hope we'll get some actual tommy pov on this to sympathize with him and see where that came from, as they have tended to do in the past with character backstory), but the fear that as someone's first you won't be ENOUGH eventually is very real.

I was my partner's first, but he wasn't mine, so even when we got engaged I was like, "are you really ok with this?" And he said yes of course and i took him at his word, but it didn't immediately erase the feeling that I was taking experiences away from him lol. So I can really see where Tommy is coming from, despite my sorrow and anxiety about the remaining unknowns. But I do hope there's more to this.

[t4twnyclaw]

i think i have many thoughts about a starless clan arc, and only ONE of them good. spoilers for the ENTIRE ARC below.

CONTEXT: ASC is the only arc that I actually followed from start to end, when I got into TBC and AVOS those arcs were already complete and I spoiled myself and had a general idea of the plot and characters of that arc. ASC is the first arc ever in the WC series that I followed from start to finish; and I finally understand when other WC fans mention forgotten character arcs/unfinished plot-lines and rushed endings because oh my god ASC had all of these issues.

first of all. the villain. Splashtail.

I'm not going to lie I really enjoyed him in STAR. He is no Hawkfrost or Brokenstar but his kit-stealing motivations in Star were actually really nice to see. If this side of him was explored earlier on , oe eluded to I wouldn't be as disappointed but the problem here is: that his character shift slipping into madness isn't as smooth as it could be, and I feel like this in the previous book as well, where he seemingly drops his 'nice guy' facade completely.

Tigerstar the First's spiral into evil and madness is done way better. He's depicted as a loyal abiet a bit ruthless warrior, and a respectful family man (He does genuinely care for his kids.) and then he spirals and ends up killing and threatening his clanmates in gruesome ways. (Leading dogs to Brindleface, just blindly killing Runningwind and Redtail, Gorsepaw. etc.)

But at the same time you can see why people follow him, and why SC was eager to elect him as leader. He actually shows leadership skills. He feeds SC, he's a *warrior*.

The way Splashtail's descent leaves ALOT to be desired. It sucks because I loved the Macbeth-like lens they try to spin with Curlfeather and Splashtail but it just ends up falling flat, to me. Splashtail is just some teenager with no charisma skills but he could've been written like Tigerstar 1.

Unfinished plots/Plotholes

While ranting and raving about Splashtail I remembered how in the earlier books, It seemed like He and Berryheart (and their supporters) had a plan together from the beginning. But then STAR comes around and Berryheart and Splashtail's plan seemed to just be...her joining him? merging SC and RC? It seemed like it was a bigger deal in the first few books but it just felt like it fell flat here. Was their plan to try and vote Tigerstar 2 out of his position?

Tree specifically is mentioned twice, having to mediate the SC invading RC situation and both times I'm pretty sure we don't get a follow-up. And he seemingly did a bad job because RC still is really really, hostile against SC. So...Maybe he shouldn't be a mediator if he can't even mediate...correctly?

Leaders can be 'voted' out yet RC doesn't do this with Splashtail when he threatens kittens and obviously doesn't have the best interest in mind anymore.

One of the first lines Nightheart has is about Leadership being fluid, and being a shared responsibility between a few cats. In STAR, RC does just this when Splashtail is killed, even having two representatives during a gathering. I don't understand why RC just tried to disband instead of trying this out...

In STAR Sparrowtail has a conversation about family vs clan duties to Tigerstar 2. as if Tigerstar 2 doesn't CONSTANTLY put his family above his clan.

In STAR Frostpaw acts like she's never heard or seen of Leopardstar but...isn't Leopardstar the first Starclan cat she ever sees.

When Nightheart returns to TC It's implied Finchlight knows what heartbreak feels like, in regards to romantic love. WHO DID SHE LIKE...

Things I liked

Frostpaw, that's it. Frostpaw's POV actually carried this entire ARC. Even in TBC Bristlefrost and Rootspring's POV's may have dragged a bit (especially Rootpsrings) But they still contributed to the plot and characters greatly. Here, Nightheart and Sunbeam POV's mostly involve just each other and their feelings for each other to the point I think, it's obsessive.

I liked the warrior code changes, and I liked seeing Berryheart try to get Tigerstar 2 demoted, even if it was disappointing to actually witness and see play out.

I REALLY loved the names Splashtail gave Mistpaw and Greypaw. and I really like the idea of leaders giving new names as a punishment-of sorts. It reminds me of the cruel names from the first ARC.

I loved the relationship between parents and how that effects Frostpaw and Sunbeam. I wish we actually had more content of Lightleap and her parents, maybe to see how that effects her but whatever...

final thoughts

Sunbeams relationship with Nightheart wasn't anything new I really wanted to see her interact more with Lightleap and her family. Just, overall having Sunbeam STAY in SC instead of *immediately* joining TC would've been better. We have had all these arcs in TC's POV and just having Sunbeam stay in SC would've been SO MUCH BETTER!!!!

Having her realize she loves SC's territory and wants her kits to experience what she experienced so in the 2 month timeskip she and Nightheart move to SC instead would've sufficed.

overall. maybe a 4/10. and that 4 is completely from Frostpaw.

[sarroora]

Hey sorry to bug you but uhhh things aren't looking too hot in the good ol US of A right now because Mr. Overcooked Rump Roast is expected to win and basically has already

In my current situation I should be safe for a while but a lot of the people I know won't be

I'm hoping that whatever dumpster bonfire is going on over here doesn't affect Egypt too bad but shit damn I also thought that Kamala would win but look how that turned out, heh.

(You don't have to respond I just wanted to give you an update and some prayers ❤️🙏)

Hey dear ❤️ - no, please do, I too NEED to reach out and talk to people.

Like I only have a surface level understanding of how elections in the US work, but I know that the system is bullcrap. And yes, Trump’s a psycho so please protect yourself. The very idea that not every vote has the same weight at the end of the day is steeped in racism and classism but nothing surprises me anymore.

Really, if there’s anything the Zionist-American genocide against Palestine confirmed in clear light is how evil of a lie ‘western democracy and morality’ is. Like - the rest of the world already knew it for centuries (most of us endured long histories of abuse and settler colonialism since the Romans, after all) but now even people living in the west have their eyes open and no longer fall for the lies and propaganda. But it feels awful to be associated with what our govs are doing when we had NO choice in the matter.

GOD don’t get me started on Egypt - did you know that our complacent ‘leadership’ has allowed a ship carrying weapons to IsnotReal through our waters? People went nuts. Everyone is in a rage and feels humiliated that this happened.

Like here’s a short vid taken by a woman that went viral and even made it to foreign news channels. You may not understand what’s being said in the vid, but the people are aghast, and you can hear rage and panic and profanity all around. The lady recording could only keep repeating in utter disbelief, “you sons of bitches.” (Referring to our president and posse)

Yeah. Things are going to hell here overall. We as civilians are literally held hostage by a draconian military regime that’s throwing everybody in prison on one hand - including minors - and robbing people blind with unexplained ‘taxes’ and insane inflation on the other. The middle class is crushed. No economical reform and no jobs. And people go to prison for objecting - kidnapped by the police in the middle of the night and thrown in secret prisons across the country where their own families can’t find them.

The currency rate to the USD right now here is 1 USD to 50 Egyptian Pounds. FIFTY.

And it’s projected to reach 80 by the end of the 2024. EIGHTY. In less than 2 months. Shifting the blame onto anything else but the consequences of their own decision-making. All while the president and ruling class (military generals) are becoming wealthy and sit above the law. The justice system is in their pockets.

And guess what, Trump loves our guy. Why wouldn’t he, I wouldn’t put it past him that he do anything - even sell his own country and its people and the people next door in Palestine if Trump asked him to. And I’m sure Trump’s gonna push for Palestinians to be expelled from their land and settle in Egypt (which is another country Isnotreal is VERY interested in occupying next, btw) thus helping the Zionists fully take over what remains of Palestine and expand into Greater Isnotreal.

These freaks are insane, istG.

Correct me if I’m wrong, but from what I heard of Harris, it’s not like she was gonna be much better than Trump. Just perhaps a little sneakier. US has treated Isnotreal as its 51st state for decades, it’s not like the politics of the country will change with her. Congress deals with Isnotreal as if it’s more important than America itself. Who’s given the title of ‘president’ doesn’t matter.

Until the US political system is completely changed and the settler colony that is Insnotreal is wiped off the map, we’re all gonna do what’s right in whatever small ways we can and be each other’s backs, even if we live on different continents ❤️.

[mcytblr-archive]

Early MCYTblr Interviews: kermiekermie

today's interviewee is @kermiekermie, who ran "Friend or Host", was a part of the "Block Men Simps" group chat, and has generally been an active member of MCYTblr for a long time! below is a transcript of the questions and answers.

Q: What was your general experience in MCYTblr? Does anything stand out to you immediately?

A: I think my general experience on mcytblr was pretty positive compared to some peoples. The one thing that really stands out is how young I was- i was 11 when i joined mcytblr in early-mid 2020. That didnt really change the way people treated me aside from the occasional teasing and babying, but I did make it a point to say I didn't want to be treated differently. Mcytblr was not my first time in a fandom space and I knew how to avoid creeps already so I never really had any truly negative experiences, honestly the only annoying things that happened were being banned from discords and blocked by people due to my age (which was completely understandable). The biggest memory I have of mcytblr is of course the Block Men Simps group chat, and the original members of the group chat are really the only tumblr mutuals I still keep up with (snail actually has my snapchat!) I still kind of view them as a sort of family, and they were there for me in what I consider an extremely low point of my life and really helped me take my mind off things. During quarantine, I didnt have any of my irls numbers or socials and my mom had just been diagnosed with breast cancer, so I quite literally NEVER left the house and tumblr was really the only social interaction I got for a solid year. And while that definitely impacted my social development (i still cant start a conversation with someone irl without feeling nauseous and shaky) i'm very grateful I had people to talk to throughout that.

Q: I understand that you were the one who set up "Friend or Host". What was the process of organizing a fandom event like that like?

A: Friend or host . god. Like I said, I was 11-12 throughout the majority of my time on mcytblr, and I had ZERO experience organizing anything and I had very little help from anyone else. I tried to make it work the best I could and got creative, but overall I don't think it was a very big success. Funnily enough, not everyone who participated in FOH knew my age and one of the winners actually blocked me afterwards they found out, which I still giggle about today.

Q: How did Friend or Host go?

A: I don't think FOH necessarily went bad, but if I had a little more help and better organization skills and planned it out further ahead of time, I think it would've gone better. It was still fun and I had a good time either way, but I can admit it was a little messy.

Q: What major events in the fandom do you remember? (Either from the MCYTers themselves or fandom-specific!)

A: Honestly, my memory of my time in the wider mcytblr community isnt all that great and I tend to get timelines a little messed up, but i DO remember being there for the creation of the original dreamceler copypasta. In the BMS group chat we were having our normal conversation and someone oncest got brought up at the same time as dream somehow, and thus Ginger wrote the extremely cursed dreamceler copypasta. This eventually evolved into an entire universe (the dreamceler cinematic universe?) with various different copypastas that eventually had to be archived because of how out of hand it got. Sometimes I still see the copypastas floating around and it kind of freaks me out every time. I also have a veryyyy vivid memory of the time I made the 2020 mcytblr election discord read OmegaNotFound on wattpad (do NOT research. for your own safety) and it was really amusing seeing everyones reactions.

Q: Do you remember any of the "kinnie" blogs?

A: oh MY the kinnie blogs!! i actually have dms with a couple of them plotting little jokes and such and I got involved with them quite often!! i actually ran a justaminx one for a couple days (yikes) and it wasnt really that believeable looking back. me and ginger as well as a couple other mooties loved spamming the ask boxes of them with piss jokes and such, and I feel like we played a pretty big role in how widespread and popular kinnie blogs became.

Q: What was the "Kroger Anon"?

A: oh my dearest kroger anon how I miss you…. I still dont know who the kroger anon actually WAS, but they would send rainbow colored advertising messages about Kroger to various mcytblr blogs at random intervals. Funny thing is, I dont live near any krogers and have never been to one in my life, but the anon messages kinda made me want to go. I miss kroger anon…. kroger anon if youre reading this come home please..

Q: What were common in-jokes in the fandom of that time? (Copypastas, headcanons, rumors, etc)

A: Common in-jokes is a hard one!! like i said earlier, my memory of my time in mcytblr isnt all that great or extensive and I could probably better answer this if I went through my archive but alas, I do not have the patience for that. Obviously we had the good ole tapeworm and pregnancy posts, dreamceler, and various other cursed copypastas and memes. One inside joke between the block men simps gc was "thinkign 👽" which came from a typo snail made that just kind of caught on and we would use every once in a while to giggle at. Other than that, I can't really think of any specific inside jokes.

Q: Is there anything else you remember or would like to talk about?

A: Something I really want to talk about is how much lurking I did!! on the outside I was definitely a normal parasocial mcytblr blog but I lurked on pretty much every corner of the fandom you could really think of. Obviously I have a ton of critblr and other controversial mutuals but I never really openly interacted with that side of mcytblr since it was pretty heavily debated and I am nothing if not conflict avoidant. I also did quite a bit of truthing that no one ever really mentioned which I guess I sort of appreciate. I think being in a fandom that involved actual real people ar that age for that long kind of screwed with me, and ive never really been able to be in a fandom for a piece of actual fiction because theyve just never gotten my interest in the same way, I guess. Even now, i was in grouptwt for quite a while (tgc podcast) and now im active on kpoptwt, which again, both of those fandoms are for actual real people. I dont think its the parasocial aspect either, ive never been super parasocial and have never had a problem criticizing the content creators I watch. Im really grateful for all the people I met on mcytblr, but I think the actual dream smp and the way I engaged with content overall negatively impacted how I interact with things now.