#the french narrator

[sadboi-in-a-sweater]

hi i uhhhhh. Did a thing

Lore!

Info on The French Narrator (Butcher Vanity AU): Physical Description: The French Narrator from Bikini Bottom is a chillingly peculiar figure to behold. With a body seemingly tailored to blend into the depths of the ocean, he stands at an average human height, yet his presence looms large due to the bulky diving gear that envelops him. His copper diving helmet is a stark contrast to his otherwise sleek black wetsuit, which fits snugly and is adorned with a small French flag on one sleeve. The helmet, with its circular, glass window, allows for only the faintest glimpse of his crimson eyes, which pierce through the darkness like twin laser beams. Above this metal cranium, a red bowtie adds an eerie touch of elegance, while a matching beret sits atop, giving him an air of sophistication that starkly contrasts with his heinous deeds. His diving boots are robust and provide him the ability to navigate both land and sea with ease. His build is lanky yet surprisingly strong, which aids in his ability to overpower his unsuspecting victims. Despite the horrors he conceals, his exterior exudes a sense of charm and grace that belies the monster beneath. Personality: Beneath the calm and suave demeanor of the French Narrator lies a cunning and calculating mind. His soothing, yet thickly-accented French voice lulls those around him into a false sense of security, a trait he uses to his advantage as he weaves through the town unnoticed. He is highly intelligent, often speaking in riddles and metaphors that leave the inhabitants of Bikini Bottom intrigued and slightly confused. His charisma is undeniable, making it easy for him to charm his way into the hearts and homes of his unsuspecting prey. However, when it comes to his macabre hobby, he is cold and detached, seeing his victims as nothing more than ingredients for his next gourmet meal. The French Narrator is meticulous and precise in his actions, ensuring that no evidence of his grisly activities remains behind. His ability to think on his feet and adapt to situations makes him a formidable and elusive predator. Background: The origins of the French Narrator's twisted culinary habits are shrouded in mystery. It is rumored that he was once a renowned chef in the highest echelons of French society, who stumbled upon a dark recipe book lost in the annals of time. This book contained the secrets to dishes that could only be made with the flesh of the ocean's most bizarre and intelligent creatures. Driven by an insatiable hunger for gastronomic perfection, he turned his talents from preparing exquisite dishes for the elite to hunting the very beings he used to serve. His descent into madness began when he was exiled from France for his unorthodox culinary practices. He found refuge in the colorful and oblivious world of Bikini Bottom, where he could pursue his dark passions without the prying eyes of his former peers. His introduction to this macabre lifestyle has transformed him into a creature of the deep, lurking in the shadows and waiting for the perfect moment to strike. His background in high society has honed his ability to blend in and manipulate, allowing him to insinuate himself into the lives of the town's inhabitants without suspicion. Despite his gourmet tastes, he has a particular fondness for the simple folk of Bikini Bottom, seeing them as both a challenge to his culinary skills and a means to an end for his twisted appetite.

[thezenanna]

art model agatha and pathetic loser rio au 😳

everyone go read ash's fic 💞

unholy uncropped version of agatha

[vamprisms]

(\/㇏(•̀ᵥᵥ•́)ノ\/)

[gaslighting69]

SpongeBob content

[itstimeforstarwars]

[ID: ao3 tag that says "huge tw for French" in all caps]

Not only is this the funniest tag I have ever seen in my life, but the author is a native French speaker.

[awesome-s0up]

man i love frenchy hes aweosme

[bonebeautyart]

Some of my favorite quotes from the reflection of Saint Just by Alexis Philonenko in the book "Metaphysics and morality"

[jetofganymede]

wait no no no. Jean is pronounced Jean? as in John with the French j sound?? Not Jean as in apple bottom jeans??? oh my god please tell me I'm not the only idiot who's been reading it this way the vibes are so different please

[pigeonpalacade]

When the battle's lost and won

[heartsoftruth]

“I just wanted to give him a hug, I felt for him like a father.”

[pinkuusimp]

“J’ai jamais connu ça, je l’imagine seulement”

[cactusringed]

Sometimes I feel self conscious abt the lore dumps in my writing. Then I remember the shit Victor Hugo pulled in les mis and I'm like yeah I'm fine actually

[vamprule]

My friend @m4y-b3ll bought the cutest crochet whales and called them the renga whales + their child due to the colors, so I had to draw them 🥹💞

🌊 Happy MerMay!! (I say it counts) 🫧

Bonus: Family photo and textless version of art

[bobcatmoran]

I was waiting at the Nicollet Mall train station, and a woman came up to me, "'Scuse me?" she asked. "Which way is Nicollet Mall? I figure I can hop on the train here and take it there."

I pointed out that Nicollet Mall was, in fact, the street at the other end of the platform, and she was delighted.

Absolutely made my day.

[skepticalcatfrog]

Okay, I need to know. Anyone else who has listened to the Secret Shanghai audiobooks (because that's how I'm reading them), does it bother you when the narrator doesn't do the accents that characters are supposed to have?

[wordwizards]

d'urfe at the gorcha household when they feed him chicken soup