#the first time jean gets to hold her/him he almost breaks down because it's such a vulnerable little thing
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thinking of older catlaila with a kid...
#they bring it to annual trojan meetups and its the most dotted on baby in the world#the first time jean gets to hold her/him he almost breaks down because it's such a vulnerable little thing#and cat and laila both trust him to protect it#cat alvarez#laila dermott#usc trojans#the sunshine court#all for the game
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Joel Miller x f!reader
MILLER'S ABYSS

Summary: Your sister is marrying one of the Millers — but you despise the other one, and the feeling is mutual. Still, family is supposed to stick together, not tear each other apart. So, over time, the two of you grow closer… far closer than anyone ever expected.
Warnings: 18+ MDNI, enemies to lovers, age gap (not really mentioned), strong language, nicknames (goor girl…) praise kink, sexual tension, oral sex ( f receiving ), creampie, rough unprotected sex ( p i v ), harassment, mention of weapons and alcohol
A/n: Hello! I swear to god I wrote a long ass novel. I am really sorry for anyone, who decided to read the whole thing…anyways if you have any ideas, suggestions, or anything else, feel free to text me. Also, I apologize for any grammar mistakes or phrases that might not make sense—English isn’t my first language :3 But I hope you enjoy the story! <3
Masterlist
You’ve been around since the very beginning of your sister’s relationship with Tommy.
From the moment she started gushing daily about how beautiful his eyes were, how no man had ever smiled at her the way he did, how kind and attentive he was. You witnessed it all — the blissful highs and the inevitable lows. The fights, the breaks, the tearful late-night conversations about breaking up… though they never actually did.
You were there for every moment, even the ones you wish you hadn’t been. Kate had never been shy about sharing even the most intimate details of her relationship with you. She had no filter, and unfortunately for you, that included describing her and Tommy’s sex life in disturbingly vivid detail.
Once, you even caught them in the act in your own house. But hey, that’s a memory you can kind of laugh about now… sort of.
So when she told you Tommy had proposed, you weren’t surprised — not in the slightest. You were happy for her. You loved your sister more than anything, and you knew she had chosen the right guy. Honestly, you were just relieved she hadn’t chosen his brother — Joel.
From the first moment those grumpy, judgmental eyes met yours, Joel Miller had been a pain in your ass. Arrogant. Insufferable. Always had something snarky to say about you at every family gathering. And sure, you gave it back. You were never the type to sit there and take it. Which is exactly how this rivalry had formed. Let’s just call it what it is: you and Joel were enemies.
Until now, it wasn’t really a problem. You could ignore him, roll your eyes when his name came up, and pray you wouldn’t be seated next to him at dinner. But now that your sister was officially going to be a part of the Miller family, officially taking their name, sharing their home, their holiday dinners, that made you, like it or not, a part of their family too. Great.
And if that wasn’t enough, your sister had been relentlessly pushing you to make peace with Joel. “For her.” As if you owed it to her to get along with a man who seemed to exist solely to piss you off.
She guilt-tripped you into it, like she always did, and you hated that it worked. Because as manipulative as she could be, you loved the hell out of her. And you knew this meant the world to her. But Joel? Joel was still a jackass, pre-wedding or not, he wasn’t going to change.
You were still at home when Kate barged into your room like she owned the place — which, technically, she almost did, considering how often she was there. Dressed in a soft green sweater and jeans, she looked casual, relaxed, and maddeningly excited.
Meanwhile, you were half-dressed, still holding a flat iron in one hand and a look of pure dread on your face.
“Come on,” she said with a cheerful grin. “It’s just dinner.”
You narrowed your eyes at her in the mirror. “It’s never just dinner when Joel’s involved.”
Kate sighed dramatically, flopping down on your bed like some exhausted mother of the bride. “You two need to get over this weird… war thing. He’s really not that bad.”
You raised an eyebrow. “He once referred to me as ‘extra baggage’ in front of your entire family.”
“Okay, yes, that was… not his finest moment. But he was joking,” she admit, but still tried to save it.
“Oh yeah, nothing screams hilarious comedy like being publicly insulted.”
She sat up, crossing her legs under her. “Please, babe. Just try tonight. For me. If you can survive one dinner without threatening to stab him with a fork, I swear I���ll never ask you for anything ever again.”
You let out a dry laugh. “You say that every time.”
“And yet you keep saying yes,” she smirked.
You groaned. She was right. You hated how much you loved her. With a final puff of frustration, you turned off the flat iron, stood up, and grabbed your jacket. “Fine. But if he calls me ‘baggage’ again, I’m pouring wine on his lap.”
Meanwhile, Joel is going through the exact same thing. Tommy’s been in his ear all week, pressuring him to play nice. To “just give her a chance.” Tommy’s been acting like he’s the victim, like he’s stuck in the middle, practically begging Joel to make the effort. So now you and Joel are both being dragged into this under the pretense of a “family bonding” dinner.
By the time you two got to the Miller house, it was already dusk. The porch light was on, casting a warm glow over the wood panels and old swing seat hanging to the side. Tommy opened the door before you even knocked. He immediately scooped Kate into his arms, greeting her with a kiss that lasted a bit too long for your taste.
“Jesus, get a room,” you muttered under your breath.
Tommy chuckled. “Evenin’,” he said, giving you a nod.
You gave him a polite smile. “Hey.”
Then came the moment your blood turned cold. Joel stepped into the doorway, leaning casually against the frame. His hair was slightly damp like he’d just showered, and his sleeves were rolled up to his elbows. He didn’t say anything — just looked at you. You looked back. And there it was again, that mutual expression of ugh, it’s you.
Kate and Tommy exchanged matching looks and leaned into your ears simultaneously.
“Be nice,” she hissed at you.
“Don’t start anything,” Tommy whispered to Joel.
You both scoffed.
Dinner prep was a disaster waiting to happen. For some unknown reason, probably Kate and Tommy being evil geniuses, you and Joel were tasked with setting the table and bringing out the food. The tension in the kitchen was unbearable.
“Could you not stand in front of the fridge like a statue?” you snapped.
“I’m getting the damn salad, princess,” Joel grumbled, pulling out the bowl and practically shoving it into your arms.
You glared. “Try using your words instead of your muscles, Neanderthal.”
He rolled his eyes. “Don’t tempt me to go back to grunting. Might actually be more productive.”
The more you moved around each other, the worse it got — bumping hips at the counter, brushing arms when reaching for the same spoon, and more than once, you two knocked elbows hard enough to make you both wince.
“Watch it,” you muttered.
“You watch it,” he shot back.
“Jesus Christ,” you both said at the same time, throwing your heads back in sync. Which, of course, only made things worse because now you were in sync, and that was not acceptable.
Finally, Kate came in and clapped her hands. “Enough! Can you two just pretend not to hate each other for one night? Please?”
You and Joel both grumbled something under your breath and carried the last dishes to the table in stony silence.
Dinner was… exactly what you expected. You sat across from Joel — naturally. Your jaw was clenched the entire time, and you were very aware of every fork and knife placement, just in case they needed to become weapons. The air was so thick with tension it could’ve been sliced like the roast chicken on the table.
Kate and Tommy tried to salvage the evening with small talk.
“So…” Kate started, glancing between you and Joel, “how was everyone’s day?”
“Fine,” you said flatly.
“Work,” Joel replied, same tone.
Tommy tried to step in. “Hey, did you two know you both listen to Johnny Cash? I found out the other day when—”
“I liked him first,” you snapped.
Joel raised a brow. “Didn’t realize it was a competition.”
“Everything is a competition with you.”
Tommy looked between you both like a tennis match was playing out on the table. “O-kayyy…”
Kate, bless her heart, still tried. “Oh! What’s one thing you two have in common, hmm? Let’s start there.”
You both said nothing.
Joel took a slow sip of water and said, “We both hate this dinner.”
You nodded. “He’s not wrong.”
Kate sighed, Tommy just reached for the wine bottle, shaking his head. They both knew this is going to be a long night.
Dinner was mostly quiet — painfully so. The clink of forks against plates and the occasional hum of conversation from Tommy and Kate filled the room, but that was about it. You and Joel barely spoke.
Occasionally, your eyes would meet across the table, sometimes with passive annoyance, other times with flat-out disgust, and sometimes with something neutral. But even neutrality between you two felt tense, like a ceasefire that could end at any moment.
Tommy tried to lighten the mood a few times, making dumb jokes about the food or poking at Joel’s cooking skills.
“This chicken dry, or is it just me?” he teased with a grin.
Joel gave him a look. “If it’s dry, it’s ’cause you didn’t baste it. That was your job.”
Kate laughed, trying to follow up. “At least you two managed not to kill each other in the kitchen, right?”
No response. But they tried again.
“So,” Kate began, clearly reaching, “any plans this weekend?”
“I work,” you said.
Joel echoed, “Same.”
Another silence fell, heavier than before. The kind of silence that made your jaw ache just from clenching it so long. No matter how hard Tommy and Kate tried to spark something between you two — laughter, small talk, anything — the tension in the room snuffed it out before it could catch fire. It wasn’t just awkward. It was chemical.
You and Joel in the same space were like two opposing forces, constantly repelling, constantly charged. Too close and it sparked. Too far and it still lingered in the air like static.
After dinner, as expected, you and Joel were once again exiled to the kitchen, this time to wash the dishes.
Kate had literally clapped her hands and said, “Bonding time!” before shoving the dirty plates into your arms. You didn’t even have time to argue before she and Tommy disappeared into the living room, probably to laugh about your misery.
Now you stood next to Joel, the two of you shoulder-to-shoulder at the sink.
He washed. You dried. Silence.
The sound of running water filled the space, along with the occasional clink of a fork against a plate. You hadn’t said a single word since you entered the kitchen, and neither had he.
The mood wasn’t angry, though. Not anymore. It was something else. Something you couldn’t quite name.
You turned your head slightly, and your gaze drifted downward, toward his hands.
You didn’t mean to stare, but something about them caught you. His hands were large, strong, weathered. The veins stood out beneath the tanned skin, pulsing slightly as he gripped a soapy plate. His knuckles looked a little bruised, like he’d been working with tools recently, or maybe throwing punches. There was hair on his forearms, just enough, and the muscles flexed subtly as he moved, the way a man’s body does when he doesn’t even think about it.
You swallowed. Your eyes lingered on his fingers. Long, sure, and steady. You imagined, just for a split second, how they would feel against your skin. What they would do if they weren’t holding a dish, but holding you. You bit your lip.
The kitchen faded around you. The water noise dimmed. Everything felt slow, heavy, thick like honey. Your chest tightened, your stomach dropped, and something low and electric buzzed between your legs — a tension that coiled and pulled without warning, warm and unwanted and there. You weren’t even breathing right.
You didn’t realize he was speaking to you.
“Hey. Plate.”
Your head snapped up, too late. He was holding a clean plate, expecting you to take it. But your hands stayed frozen, and when he let go, it slipped. The crash was loud.
Porcelain shattered against the floor in a sharp burst, and you gasped, stepping back automatically.
“Shit,” Joel muttered under his breath, already reaching down.
You moved forward, instinctively trying to kneel, but his hand shot out fast, palm pressed against your hip to stop you.
“Don’t,” he said firmly, his voice low — not angry, not annoyed. Protective. You froze in place.
He crouched and swept up the shards quickly, moving with precision, barely saying a word. He worked silently, efficiently, like it was nothing, but his jaw was tight. His eyes flicked up at you once, his brows furrowed. His expression was angry and confused all at once.
He stood back up after dumping the last of the shards into the trash bin, wiping his hands on a towel with a sigh, sharp and fed up.
Then he turned toward you with that same ever-present frustration in his eyes.
“What is wrong with you?”
You blinked at him, speechless.
“What, were you daydreamin’ so hard you forgot how to use your hands?”
His tone wasn’t playful. It wasn’t even annoyed. It was accusatory, like you’d done it on purpose, just to piss him off.
You didn't answer. You couldn't. Your body was frozen in place, the towel still clenched in your fingers, your lips parted like you might say something — but no sound came out. You weren’t even mad. Not this time. Because underneath all that embarrassment, all that tension, was confusion.
What the hell was that?
Why had you been staring at his hands like they were goddamn poetry? Why had your brain short-circuited and your body reacted like that — like you wanted something from him?
From Joel fucking Miller.
You didn’t understand yourself right now. At all.
Joel scoffed under his breath when you didn’t respond and brushed past you without another word, tossing the towel over the edge of the sink and leaving you standing there — warm, unsettled, and angry at no one but yourself.
After you and Kate finally left the Miller house and inhaled the fresh night air, Kate looped her arm through yours. She looked up at you with that too-knowing expression.
“Well?” she asked, her voice casual, but the look on her face said spill it.
You gave her the look — that don’t start with me kind of face.
Kate exhaled, long and exaggerated. “Seriously? What is it gonna take for you two to stop acting like mortal enemies?”
You didn’t answer right away, just stared out at the sidewalk ahead.
“I know he’s annoying,” she went on. “I know he’s pushy, and grumpy, and rude as hell, but Jesus, he’s not the devil. He’s just Joel.”
You finally spoke, voice lower than usual. “I get it. Okay? I get it. You’re marrying into his family, I’m technically gonna be stuck with him for the rest of my life, blah blah blah.”
She smirked. “So you’ll try?”
You sighed. “I will. But only if he does, too. I can’t be the only one putting effort into something we both clearly hate.”
Kate made a noise between a laugh and a groan. “Fair enough. But God, I swear, if you two ruin the wedding photos with your death glares…”
Back inside the Miller house, Joel was slouched on the couch, legs spread out, beer in hand. Tommy returned from the kitchen with two more beers and plopped down beside him.
“So,” he said, cracking open a bottle. “What the hell happened in there?”
Joel didn’t even look at him. “She dropped a plate.”
Tommy squinted. “She dropped it?”
Joel shrugged. “I handed it to her, and she just… didn’t take it. Let it fall. Her fault.”
Tommy gave him a really, man? look. “You think maybe she was distracted or somethin’? Maybe you distracted her?”
Joel scoffed. “You think she was distracted by me? Please. If anything, she was probably daydreamin’ about strangling me.”
Tommy raised a brow, clearly not buying the sarcasm. “You ever think that maybe the reason you two can’t stop fighting is because there’s somethin’ else going on?”
Joel shot him a glare. “What the hell is that supposed to mean?”
“It means,” Tommy said, leaning forward with that big-brother patience, “that you’ve been on her case since day one. And maybe it’s not just because she annoys you.”
Joel opened his mouth, but Tommy cut him off.
“I’m serious, man. The wedding’s in a few days. Can you do me a favor and try to get along with her until then? I don’t need you two turning the rehearsal dinner into a goddamn war zone.”
Joel looked away, jaw clenched. He didn’t say anything for a while. Just took a long drink from his bottle.
Eventually, he muttered, “I’ll think about it.”
Tommy rolled his eyes. “Better than nothing, I guess.”
The tension between you and Joel hadn’t eased in the slightest since that night at the Miller household. If anything, the silence had grown louder, more hostile. Kate and Tommy, of course, refused to give up on their master plan to “bring the two of you together,” as if your lives were a cheesy rom-com and not a daily emotional battlefield.
With the wedding quickly approaching, they decided the best way to force bonding would be through responsibility. Specifically: seating arrangements and wedding invitations. Apparently, this critical task needed the undivided attention of you and Joel. Together. Alone. In their house. Because of course.
Kate and Tommy conveniently had an appointment in town, something about last-minute candle holders and music rehearsals, and “oh no, what a shame, you guys will just have to hold down the fort!” Kate practically squealed while Tommy tried to look like it wasn’t part of their evil plan.
So there you were, sitting stiffly at the Millers’ dining table, stacks of RSVP cards, envelopes, and color-coded guest lists spread out in front of you. Joel sat across from you, equally still, equally uninterested in being here.
The silence was thick. Occasionally, one of you would mutter something like, “He’s allergic to nuts, right?” or “That name’s spelled with an ‘e’.”
Minimal communication. Minimal eye contact. Maximal contempt.
You let out a heavy sigh as you picked up a fresh stack of blank envelopes. “Y’know, this would’ve been so much easier if the world hadn’t ended,” you muttered under your breath. “A few clicks and everyone would’ve had a damn email invite. Done in five minutes.”
Joel raised an eyebrow. “You miss the internet that bad?”
You shrugged. “I miss not having to do this shit by hand, yeah.”
He scoffed. “It’s a wedding. People used to do this all the time.”
You shot him a look. “People used to do a lot of dumb things.”
Joel raised both hands in mock surrender, then muttered, “Including arguing about paper.”
A few beats passed in silence again before you looked up, a smirk tugging at the corner of your mouth. “This whole thing’s weird, isn’t it?”
Joel looked at you cautiously. “Which part?”
“All of it,” you said. “Two people falling in love in this… mess. Choosing each other. Wanting to celebrate it. Feels like some part of the old world pretending it still exists.”
He didn’t respond, just kept his eyes on the page in front of him.
You watched him a second longer, then said, “I mean… what does that even mean anymore? Love. You think it still means the same thing it used to?”
Joel finally looked up.
You met his gaze, and the words slipped out before you could think twice, not really curious, more mocking than anything else. “What does love even mean to you, Joel Miller?”
He stared at you, his jaw slowly tightening.
You added with a touch of venom, “Have you even ever been in love? Or are you too emotionally constipated for that, too?”
He froze. The look in his eyes darkened, and the air between you changed.
“The hell did you just say?”
You didn’t flinch. “I called you a pussy, Joel.”
His nostrils flared. “Say it again.”
“I said, you’re a pussy.”
The silence that followed was dense, almost buzzing. Joel’s eyes drilled into you, and for a second, you weren’t sure what he was going to do. Yell? Walk out?
But instead, he leaned back in his chair, arms crossed, voice low and sharp.
“You wanna talk big, huh? Then tell me, what does love mean to you, sweetheart?”
You blinked, caught off guard. “What?”
He raised his eyebrows. “Yeah. Since you’ve clearly got all the answers.”
You hesitated, heart skipping. Your mouth opened, then closed. You looked away.
“That’s what I thought,” Joel said.
You stared at the table for a long moment, heart pounding in your ears. Then, before you could stop yourself, your voice broke the silence.
“Love is… when you can’t breathe right unless that person is in the room. When you’d rather fight with them than be at peace with anyone else. When you want to see all the ugly parts of them and still stay. And when their pain… feels like yours.”
You didn’t dare look up, not right away. When you finally did, Joel was staring. Not blinking. Not moving. Just looking. Like he’d never really seen you until now.
He cleared his throat suddenly, shifted, and said, “Huh.”
Then he nodded. Once. Turned back to the list. The moment lingered. Hung between you like a string, pulled taut.
Then he spoke again.
“Love’s when you wanna walk away but something keeps pullin’ you back. When you can’t stop thinkin’ ‘bout how they laugh… or how mad they get. When you know it’s messy and it still feels like home.”
You didn’t say anything. You couldn’t. Something inside you had shifted.
But before it could settle, before the warmth could sink in…
Joel muttered, “Still doesn’t explain why you act like a damn gremlin every time I speak.”
You scoffed. “Because you speak like a man who’s never been hugged.”
“Then maybe you should try it sometime,” he shot back.
You rolled your eyes. “Oh, please. I’d rather hug a cactus.”
“Figures,” Joel said. “Prickly little thing like you would.”
Still, despite the insults, the two of you finished the task. The guest list was done. Invitations sorted. But the words exchanged, the raw ones, clung to the air. And you didn’t quite know how to feel.
You had just gotten home, the front door clicking shut behind you with a soft thud. Your shoulders slumped immediately. The moment you stepped into your own space, a small but safe corner of Jackson, you let out a sigh that had been bottled up since you left the Miller house.
The silence here was different. Not tense or charged like it had been with Joel. Just… quiet.
You slipped off your jacket, toed off your boots, and dropped your bag on the floor without ceremony. The thought of Joel’s voice, his eyes locked on yours when you told him what love meant to you…it haunted the back of your mind like a persistent shadow. You shook your head, trying to return back to reality.
A knock at your door pulled you from your thoughts. You already knew it was her.
Kate stood there with a small smile, holding a container of something vaguely edible and homemade. “Peace offering,” she said. “And no, you don’t get to say no.”
You let her in, and a few minutes later you were both curled up on your couch, the dish of food forgotten on the coffee table. Kate had that look, the one she wore when she was trying to act casual, but her whole soul was bubbling with questions.
“So…” she said, dragging the word out dramatically. “How’d it go?”
You blinked, already mentally preparing your response. “Fine.”
Kate narrowed her eyes. “Fine?”
You nodded. “We didn’t kill each other. That’s a win.”
She stared at you, and you could practically hear her brain doing somersaults. She knew something was wrong. You've never looked so confused.
Kate pulled her legs up onto the couch and faced you fully, expression softening.
“You look… tired,” she finally said, trying to keep her tone light.
“Long day,” you replied simply, brushing it off.
Kate gave you a small smile, one that didn’t quite reach her eyes. “How was the… invitation thing?”
You shrugged. “It’s done.”
There was a pause. You didn’t elaborate. And she didn’t press. You could feel her gaze lingering on you, trying to read something on your face, but you didn’t let her see it. Whatever was still spinning inside you, the strange heaviness, the warmth that shouldn’t have been there, the ghost of Joel Miller’s voice, that was yours. Yours alone.
Kate leaned back with a sigh, folding her arms.
“I know you don’t want to talk about him,” she said softly, “but I just… I need to ask.”
You looked at her, guarded.
“Do you think it’s ever going to change? Between you and Joel?”
You didn’t answer right away. You looked at your hands, picked at a loose thread on your sleeve.
“Some things don’t change,” you said quietly. “Some things just… stay broken.”
Kate’s face twisted, the fight going out of her. She blinked quickly, but it didn’t stop the tears that started forming.
You looked over, guilt blooming in your chest. “Kate…”
“I just wanted it to be perfect,” she whispered. “My wedding. This whole day I’ve been dreaming of since I was a kid. I wanted everyone I love to be there and to be happy and whole.”
“You will have that,” you said firmly, even if your voice shook a little.
She shook her head, wiping her cheeks as the tears finally fell. “Not if you two are at each other’s throats the whole time.”
You stayed quiet, watching her break down in front of you — your strong, soft-hearted sister who tried so hard to keep everyone together.
“I know I sound dramatic,” she laughed bitterly through her tears. “But I don’t want to remember walking down the aisle and seeing you scowling in one corner and Joel brooding in the other.”
You reached out and took her hand. “You won’t. I promise.”
Kate sniffled. “You can’t promise that.”
“I can promise I’ll try,” you said. “I don’t know what he’ll do, but I’ll try. For you.”
That seemed to help — not fix it, not fully, but soften the edges of her sadness. Her grip on your hand tightened.
Kate wiped her cheeks and let out a breathy laugh. “You better try, because if not, I was going to threaten you with the world’s ugliest bridesmaid dress.”
You snorted. “I’d wear it. Just to ruin your photos.”
She gasped in mock offense, then started laughing, a real one this time. You joined her, and for a few minutes, the air was lighter. Less pressure. Less ache.
At least for now.
The bed creaked softly beneath him as he shifted for the third time in five minutes. Joel lay on his back, eyes fixed on the ceiling of his dimly lit bedroom, the moonlight cutting across the room in a cold stripe. The air was still, thick with silence, and yet his mind was unbearably loud.
He’d tried everything. Rolling over. Flipping his pillow. Forcing his thoughts toward patrol routes, inventory lists, anything functional. But no matter what direction he turned, you were there. Like a ghost he hadn’t asked for but couldn’t exorcize.
Your face hovered behind his eyelids. Not angry or sharp the way it often was — but softer. Lit with that rare, fleeting smile you gave Kate. Or the way your head tipped back when you laughed at something that actually caught you off guard. That sound — fuck, that sound — warm and bright like the first day of spring after a brutal winter.
And then there was the way you touched your hair, that unconscious little motion, fingers gliding through it, tucking it behind your ear or sweeping it out of your eyes. You didn’t even know you did it. But Joel did. He’d seen it. Noticed it. Memorized it like a fool.
He pictured you leaning over the table earlier that day, shirt riding up just enough to reveal a strip of bare lower back. His gaze had lingered. Too long. He knew that. He hated that.
Your ass—round, perfect, smug in those tight jeans—had haunted him every time he closed his eyes since.
He shifted again, jaw clenched now, heat starting to pool somewhere low in his belly.
No. No, no, no.
But it was already too late. His body wasn’t asking for permission — it was responding. A twitch of pressure, a slow tightening beneath the waistband of his briefs. His breath caught as he squeezed his eyes shut, trying to banish you from his brain.
Didn’t work.
You stayed, and now you were closer — the imagined warmth of your skin, the sound of your voice in his ear, teasing, smug. The tilt of your mouth. The curve of your hips as you stood with one hand on them, rolling your eyes at something he said.
His hand fisted the sheets.
“Goddamn it,” he muttered, voice rough, hoarse with frustration — and something else.
He turned onto his side, dragging the blanket higher, willing his body to calm down. But it wouldn’t. Every time he shut his eyes, there you were — sometimes laughing, sometimes biting your lip, sometimes looking up at him with that fire in your gaze that made him feel like he was being dared to cross a line.
He groaned, low and miserable, rolling onto his back again.
This wasn’t supposed to happen. You were infuriating. You were stubborn, impulsive, mouthy. You didn’t like him. He didn’t like you.
But your voice still echoed in his head, that quiet answer you’d given when you talked about love. It had knocked something loose in him. Something buried. Something he didn’t want to name.
Joel cursed under his breath again and threw an arm over his eyes, as if blocking out the light might also block you. His body was still betraying him — hard now, pulsing and persistent, refusing to let him pretend.
He didn’t know what was happening to him. Why it was happening. Why it was happening, because of you.
He hated you. Every fiber of you. Every sound that came out of your mouth was insufferable, every sentence laced with that arrogant, sarcastic tone that made his blood boil. Your eyes, your posture, your voice, your goddamn presence—he hated it all.
So why the hell is he fucking hard right now? Why couldn’t he stop thinking about you?
Why did the image of your lips slightly parted as you chewed on your bottom one haunt him? Why did the memory of the soft curve of your waist, revealed when your shirt lifted just a little too high the other day, replay in his mind like some sick punishment? Why did he remember the sway of your hips when you walked away from him in irritation, those tight pants hugging your ass so perfectly it should’ve been illegal?
And why did his cock throb every time he let the image linger? It was torture.
He shifted in his bed again, groaning under his breath. Sheets rustled around him, clinging to his sweat-slicked skin.
He closed his eyes. He opened them. He closed them again. You were still there—in his head. Laughing, glaring, rolling your eyes, teasing him with that attitude that made him want to pin you to a wall and shut you up with his mouth.
He threw an arm over his face. Growled.
“Fuckin’ hell…”
Sleep definitely wasn’t coming tonight.
The next morning arrived like a slap in the face.
You were walking through Jackson, hands tucked into your jacket pockets, breathing in the chilled air. The sky was pale and clouded, the usual buzz of early activity around you—a couple of kids running down the path, dogs barking, someone hauling wood nearby.
You were just going to the store. That was it. Simple. In and out. Until your eyes landed on him - on Joel.
He was a little far off, working on a newly constructed cabin. His sleeves were rolled up, revealing thick, sun-kissed forearms, and you watched, breath hitching as his muscles tensed with each swing of the hammer. The way his biceps bulged, like fucking granite, as he brought the tool down with precision and force.
You knew it was wrong, but… your eyes wandered lower. Watching the way his back flexed beneath his shirt, the curve of his ass in those damn jeans, the way his hair bounced slightly with the movement, sticking to his sweaty forehead. The veins in his hands, so prominent, so… masculine, wrapped around the handle of that hammer like it owed him something.
Your stomach twisted. You swallowed hard. Your thighs pressed together. Your panties were… wet. Unmistakably. You could feel it. You were pulsing. And it was because of Joel fucking Miller.
You stared for a moment too long, heart racing, body betraying you in every way it could. Then it hit you like a truck, the embarrassment, the fury.
You tore your gaze away, eyes wide, and stormed forward like your feet could carry you out of your own body.
What the hell was wrong with you? Why were you reacting like this to him? You hated him. He was rude. Cocky. Infuriating. Not even that attractive.
So why the hell was your body acting like it wanted him inside you?
You cursed under your breath. Not at Joel. At yourself.
By the time you entered the store, you were still flustered, heart thudding in your ears. You pushed a cart forward and moved through the aisles like you were on autopilot, scanning for what you needed. Your brain was still somewhere else entirely.
That’s when someone spoke behind you.
“Hey—uh, sorry, do you know which flour’s better for, like, sourdough bread? The brown bag or the white one?”
You blinked and turned around. There was a guy. Kinda cute. Probably around your age. Tall, lean, with soft features and warm eyes. His voice was kind, curious. Not annoying. Not Joel.
You glanced at the two bags in his hands, then pointed to one. “The brown bag’s whole grain. It’s heavier. Depends what you want, but for sourdough? White’s probably safer.”
He smiled. “Thanks. I’m Hank, by the way.”
You nodded, giving a small smile back. “Nice to meet you.”
And that was it. Just… nice.
You continued your shopping, finishing quickly, keeping the interaction in the back of your mind, but it was faint. Not because Hank wasn’t lovely, but because Joel was still in your system like venom.
You paid, stepped outside with your bag in hand, and started the walk home, your mind looping the same awful thought:
Why did your body want the one person your brain wanted to strangle? You had no answer. Just the echo of his name in your head and the heavy, traitorous thrum in your chest.
The sky had long since darkened into a deep navy, the stars peeking shyly through the scattered clouds above Jackson.
Inside your home, it was warm—quiet. A soft amber glow bathed the living room from the single lamp you’d turned on, casting long shadows against the walls.
You were curled up on the couch, wearing nothing but a loose oversized T-shirt that draped just over your hips and a pair of simple cotton panties. Your legs were bare, tucked under you as you sipped from a mug of coffee that had gone lukewarm long ago, but the comfort it offered hadn’t worn off.
The silence was calming, the kind that followed an emotionally messy day. You breathed out softly, your body finally beginning to unwind—until a knock pulled you back into reality.
You didn’t flinch. You assumed, without question, that it was Kate. Probably coming to drop off something or chat about the wedding. So you padded lazily to the door, not thinking twice about how little you were wearing. Your shirt clung to your body slightly, the thin fabric doing little to hide the curve of your breasts or the faint outline of your nipples beneath it. You didn’t care. It was just Kate.
But it wasn’t Kate.
The second the door opened, and you locked eyes with the man standing there, your breath caught. Joel Miller. And he looked stunned.
His eyes scanned you—fast at first, like he knew he shouldn’t—but then slower, more deliberate. They flicked down your body, taking in the exposed skin of your legs, the hem of the shirt barely grazing your thighs. The hard peaks beneath the soft fabric. Your bare feet. Your collarbone. His mouth parted slightly, and for the briefest moment, he forgot whatever the hell he was doing there.
You noticed. You definitely noticed.
Your expression flattened into a scowl as you exhaled, annoyed. “The fuck do you want?”
That snapped him out of it. He blinked, shifting his weight awkwardly from one foot to the other, clearly trying to summon the familiar arrogance that always kept him armored around you.
“Trust me,” he muttered, voice low and gravelly, “I’d rather be anywhere else but here.”
“Great,” you snapped, already pushing the door to shut in his face. But his large, calloused hand caught the wood with ease, pushing it back open like it was nothing.
You glared but didn’t resist. There was no point. You couldn’t overpower Joel Miller, and honestly, you were too tired to try.
“Tommy sent me,” he finally said, voice returning to its usual gruff cadence. “Said we need to go grab some shit from the woods. Decoration stuff. For the wedding.”
You narrowed your eyes. “Why me?”
He shrugged, unapologetic. “Apparently, you’re a woman. Which means you’re supposed to be better at this crap than me.”
You scoffed dramatically, rolling your eyes, and turned to glance at the clock hanging in your living room. “It’s nine-fucking-p.m. Are you stupid?”
“I worked all day,” he bit back, voice edging toward exasperation, though his gaze never left your bare thighs.
You mumbled under your breath, “Yeah. I noticed.” Your eyes flicked down to the floor quickly.
Joel tilted his head. “What was that?”
“Nothing,” you replied with a fake sweet smile, lips curling with venom.
He sighed. “Are you coming or not?”
You knew damn well that if you said no, not only would he keep annoying you, but so would Kate and Tommy, and eventually, you’d cave. So you made the only rational choice—gave a dramatic sigh and stepped back into your house, leaving the door open behind you.
“Wait here,” you muttered over your shoulder.
Joel stepped inside, his boots heavy against your wooden floor. He didn’t say anything. Just took in your space with a kind of silent judgment that felt oddly intimate. It was homey. Clean. Warm. He liked it more than he should’ve.
When you returned a few minutes later, your body was dressed in a black button-up shirt that clung to your figure, paired with tight black jeans that hugged your hips and ass like they were tailor-made. You tossed your hair back and brushed your hand along the wall, grabbing your jacket.
Joel saw you. swallowing hard when he felt the blood in his body rush somewhere it really shouldn’t.
“Let’s go,” you said curtly, pushing past him and stepping out the door. He followed. Silently.
The truck rumbled to life, headlights cutting through the inky black night as Joel pulled out of your driveway. You sat in the passenger seat, arms crossed, gaze fixed out the window.
Silence. Thick silence.
Not the peaceful kind from earlier. This one was charged, buzzing under your skin like static. The air between you crackled with unspoken things, heavy tension that neither of you dared to slice through. Questions, feelings, memories—none of them had names, but they were all there, pressing into the cab of the truck like ghosts refusing to stay dead.
You didn’t look at him. He didn’t look at you. But both of you felt it. Every second ticked by like a countdown to something inevitable. Something neither of you were ready to admit.
The road stretched out endlessly ahead, swallowed by the dark trees on either side. The only sound filling the truck was the steady hum of the engine and the occasional crunch of gravel beneath the tires. You sat with your arms crossed, your body angled slightly toward the window, your gaze locked on the shadows flashing by. The silence was thick. Claustrophobic. And entirely unbearable.
Finally, Joel broke it.
“What’d you do today?”
His voice was neutral. Uninterested, even. He didn’t look at you—kept his eyes on the road, one hand resting lazily on the wheel, the other draped over the armrest. Just a casual question, thrown out into the air like it didn’t mean a damn thing.
You turned your head slowly toward him, an incredulous smirk pulling at your lips. “Really?”
Joel glanced at you once, then again, brows drawing slightly together. “What?”
A laugh burst out of you, short and bitter, as you shook your head in disbelief. “You’re seriously trying to ask me about my day?”
He didn’t respond immediately. You could tell he was debating it. Trying to find a retort that wouldn’t sound weak. But before he could even open his mouth, you beat him to it.
“You don’t even care.”
Your voice was quieter now, almost defeated. You turned your head back toward the window, watching the world blur past, soft shadows and moonlight playing tricks on your vision. For a moment, there was only silence again. Heavy. Tense.
“…I don’t,” Joel finally admitted, his tone dry, “but it’s better than this annoying-ass silence.”
You let the corner of your mouth twitch. The bastard had a point. You let a few seconds pass, then finally gave in.
“I went to the store.”
Joel gave a quiet grunt of acknowledgment, a slight nod that was barely perceptible.
“I met someone. Hank.”
Another grunt. Another nod. But this time… his grip on the steering wheel tightened. Just a little. Barely enough to notice. But you saw the way his forearm flexed, how his fingers wrapped more firmly around the leather. It was subtle. But there. A small flash of something ugly and hot in his chest. Jealousy? No. That couldn’t be. Why the hell would he be jealous?
“Is he cute?” he asked.
You didn’t even hesitate. “Not bad. Might give him my address if I see him again.”
That did it. Joel’s knuckles went white on the wheel, his jaw tightening so hard it ticked. His whole body tensed like a wire pulled too tight.
You knew exactly what you were doing. And you liked the reaction a little more than you should have.
“What about you?” you asked, voice suddenly lighter, almost teasing. “Meet any girls today?”
“Huh?” Joel glanced over at you quickly before looking back at the road.
“Come on, you know… did you meet someone new? Maybe someone young and smiley and way too optimistic for her own good?”
Joel let out a huff of air—half a laugh, half a scoff. “Not into that crap.”
“Not into what? Dating?”
He gave a slow nod. “Yeah. Who the hell would date a grumpy old bastard like me?”
Your eyes met for a second too long. And something in your chest… shifted. He didn’t say it like a joke. He wasn’t fishing for pity. He was just being honest. And you saw it, really saw it, in his expression. That quiet loneliness that clung to him like a shadow he didn’t know how to shake.
“Don’t be stupid,” you muttered. “I’m sure someone would.”
You weren’t sure why you said it. It came out before you could stop it. Before you could build your usual wall of sarcasm and spite.
Joel’s mouth twitched bitterly. “Wish I was as naïve as you.”
And god, you hated how that made you feel. That burning in your throat. The aching behind your ribs. He was so frustrating, so guarded, so closed off—but in moments like this, you could almost feel how much it cost him to let anything through.
You wanted to hug him. You wouldn’t, of course. But you wanted to.
Joel pulled the truck to a slow stop, the gravel crunching under the tires as the headlights hit a clearing at the edge of the woods. “We’re here,” he muttered, already pushing open his door without a second glance.
You followed a few seconds later, slamming the passenger door a bit too hard and catching up with him.
“So,” you asked as you reached his side, “what exactly are we looking for?”
“Shit for the wedding. Kate wants it to be all… nature-themed or whatever. So twigs, berries, moss, mushrooms. Forest crap.”
You arched a brow. “Romantic.”
Joel didn’t reply. He just handed you a small burlap sack and started heading deeper into the woods, boots crunching over fallen leaves. You walked with him in silence, collecting whatever looked remotely wedding-appropriate. The air was damp and smelled like earth. Leaves brushed against your ankles. Moonlight filtered through the branches in silvery streaks.
Then, suddenly—snap. The sharp crack of a stick breaking echoed nearby. Joel froze. His body went rigid, hand instinctively reaching for his pistol. In a second, the weapon was drawn, held steady, and aimed at the darkness beyond the trees.
You jumped, stumbling back a step and grabbing onto Joel’s arm without thinking. “Shit—what was that?”
“Do you have a gun?” he asked, eyes scanning the shadows.
“Do I look like I have a gun?!”
You moved closer to him, practically hiding behind his solid frame. Your heart was thudding like crazy, adrenaline crawling under your skin.
Joel didn’t move for a long beat, waiting. Watching. But nothing came. Just the wind brushing through the leaves and the chirp of a distant bird. Slowly, he lowered the gun.
“Probably just an animal,” he muttered, but you saw the way his shoulders remained tense. Still alert. Still ready. After a few more seconds, he glanced back at you. “You ever even held a gun?”
You raised a brow. “Do I look like I have?”
Joel sighed heavily and handed you his pistol. “Here.”
You stared at it like he’d just handed you a live snake. “What the hell am I supposed to do with this?”
“Aim,” he said flatly, giving you the simplest instruction imaginable.
You blinked at him. “Come again?”
He didn’t repeat it. Just raised an eyebrow. His expression said don’t argue. So you tried. Kind of. You awkwardly lifted the gun with both hands, your arms stiff, elbows out, your grip all wrong.
Joel let out the most exhausted sigh you’d ever heard, rubbing a hand down his face. “Jesus.”
He took the pistol back, turned it in his hands, and then showed you how to hold it properly.
Feet apart. Elbows relaxed. Grip tight but not too tight. Then he placed the gun back into your hands and watched you. But even so, you were still holding the gun wrong.
Your hands were trembling. Not much, but enough that he noticed. Enough that you noticed. The gun felt heavy, unnatural. Like it didn’t belong in your hands. Joel sighed.
He stepped behind you. Closer than he ever had before. You could feel the heat of his body pressing along your back, his chest brushing against your shoulder blades, his breath — warm and unfiltered — ghosting across the curve of your neck.
Then came his hands.
Big. Rough. Calloused. They slid over yours like they’d been made to fit there — palms swallowing yours completely, fingers curling around the outside of your own to adjust your grip. His thumbs pressed down gently, firmly guiding you, correcting you. You couldn’t breathe. You didn’t breathe.
His beard scraped softly against the edge of your cheek as he leaned in closer. His voice was low, almost a whisper. “Like this. Keep your elbows down. You’re stiff as a damn board.”
You didn’t hear the words.
You just heard him. The low rumble in his chest. The scent of him — cedar, sweat, something smoky and old and undeniably male. The warmth of his body pressed against yours in the cold woods.
And something inside you snapped. Or maybe it awakened.
A pulse flickered deep in your lower belly. Then it dropped lower. Heat bloomed between your thighs, a slow, aching throb that made your breath hitch and your knees feel just a little weaker. You clenched without meaning to — your muscles tightening instinctively, reflexively — and you felt it in your underwear. The wetness. Already.
Fuck.
Your face was on fire. You were sure of it. Your cheeks burned, your ears burned, even the back of your neck was hot — but you didn’t move. Couldn’t move. Because if you did, you’d have to step away from him. And you didn’t want to.
Your heart was hammering inside your chest, pounding against your ribs like it wanted to get out. Your thoughts were chaotic, messy, breathless, spinning.
And when he adjusted your fingers again, his thumb grazing along the sensitive skin between your thumb and forefinger, you couldn’t help the tiny sound that escaped your throat — a breathy, almost inaudible gasp.
Your skin was soft. Warm. He could smell your shampoo, something faint and floral that made him want to bury his face in your neck. He tried to focus on your stance, on the gun, on anything except the way your ass pressed back slightly against his hips, or the tiny hitch in your breath, or the fact that he could feel your pulse through your wrist.
His cock twitched.
The heat spread through him fast — like gasoline catching flame. His hands were supposed to be steady, but they started to shake. Just a little. His jaw clenched. He couldn’t tear his eyes away from your cheek, the curve of your jaw, the way your lips were slightly parted. You looked flustered. Flushed. He saw your chest rising and falling faster than before.
And he felt it.
Your body stiffening. That subtle shift of your hips. That soft, barely audible sound that slipped from your throat.
Jesus fucking Christ.
You were turned on. And now he couldn’t think. Couldn’t breathe. All he could do was stare at the back of your neck and fight the overwhelming urge to bend his head down and press his mouth there. To see if you’d make that sound again, louder this time.
His cock was already hard. Thick and aching behind his jeans, pressing against the inside of his thigh. And all because of you. Because of the way your body felt under his hands. Because of the way you smelled. Because of that little gasp.
He had to pull away. Now. Before he did something really fucking stupid. But his hands didn’t move. They wouldn’t move.
Instead, he lowered his voice again, leaning closer, his lips grazing your ear.
“That’s it,” he murmured. “Just like that. You’re doin’ good.”
Your body shivered. And Joel knew, with complete, devastating certainty, that he was royally, irreversibly fucked.
You turned around slowly, pulse loud in your ears, breath caught somewhere between your ribs and your throat.
His face was so close you could feel the heat radiating off his skin. Your noses almost brushed. The small space between you felt volatile, like a match hovering over gasoline.
His eyes met yours and you swore time folded in on itself. Everything narrowed down to that one unbearable moment of stillness, your shared breath, the roughness of his exhale fanning across your cheek, his scent laced with sweat and cedar and tension.
You weren’t breathing. You didn’t want to. You wanted to stay right there, suspended in the heaviness of that electric, untouchable almost.
And just when you swore he might tilt his head that tiny bit to close the distance, crack. A branch snapped not far from where you stood.
Joel moved instantly, instinctively. He stepped in front of you, arm extended protectively as his eyes scanned the trees.
Your chest rose and fell, rapidly now, the illusion shattered but the heat still simmering under your skin.
He didn’t look at you when he spoke. “We’re done here,” he said, his voice gravelly, low, but tight. “Let’s go. Ain’t smart to be out here after dark.”
You nodded, mute. There was nothing to say. You followed him through the trees, the pressure in your chest still coiled tight like a loaded spring.
The silence in the truck was worse than the previous drive into the woods. Neither of you said a word. You didn’t even try. The memory of his hands on yours haunted your skin. The way his body pressed behind you. The way he felt. The way your body had responded.
You shifted in your seat, thighs pressing together, breath shaky. From the corner of your eye, you saw his grip tighten on the wheel.
He was thinking about it too. You knew it. You felt it. Like the air between you still crackled with something unnamed and unbearable.
When he pulled up in front of your house, the engine idling, you turned your head to him.
“Thanks,” you said, voice barely audible. He didn’t look at you. Just nodded once.
You got out quickly, afraid your legs might give out if you didn’t move fast. Your fists were clenched as you stormed into your house and slammed the door behind you.
Joel watched until the porch light flicked on. Then he drove off. He had to.
Because if he didn’t leave right now, if he stayed even a second longer in that truck with the memory of your body pressed into his and your eyes looking at him like that, he wouldn’t be able to think. He wouldn’t be able to stop himself.
And he sure as hell wouldn’t be able to hide the growing ache in his jeans.
The next morning came like a slap. You didn’t sleep much. Every time you closed your eyes, your mind dragged you back to the woods. His breath. His voice. That moment.
You sat now on a little wooden stool, knees tucked under you, watching Kate twirl in front of the mirror in a champagne-colored dress.
“What do you think?” she asked, holding the fabric out by her sides like she was floating.
You smiled. Or at least you tried to.
“It’s perfect,” you said.
And it was—for her. It hugged her curves beautifully, made her look like a springtime goddess. She looked happy. Radiant.
You wanted to be happy with her. But you couldn’t stop thinking about Joel. You couldn’t stop thinking about his voice low in your ear. His hands gripping yours like they belonged there.
The way he pressed into your back, firm and controlled, but just barely. You swallowed hard, shifting on the stool. Your thighs pressed together and stayed there. Your fingers dug into your own knees.
God, what would it be like if he said things like that in a bed? His voice rough, that little growl he did in his throat when he was trying not to let something slip.
“That's it,” he’d say again, but slower this time, with your legs around his waist. His hand around your neck. His body heavy over yours. His—
“Hey?” Kate’s voice broke straight through your filthy mind like a cold slap of water. Your head snapped up. She was watching you in the mirror, a little frown on her face.
“You okay? You zoned out like… hard.”
You blinked. Forced a laugh. “I’m fine. Just tired, I think.”
Kate turned toward you, dress swishing with her. “You sure? You look kinda pale.”
You smiled again. “I’m good. Promise.”
She squinted for a second longer, then let it go. “Okay. Well, you better wake up before tonight. Everyone’s gonna be at the bar. You are coming, right?”
You hesitated. “I don’t know, Katie…”
“Don’t you dare bail on me,” she said, walking over and poking you square in the forehead. “It’s my last free Saturday before wedding chaos hits full force. You’re coming. No excuses.”
You sighed, lips pressed together. “Fine. I’ll go. For you.”
“Damn right it’s for me,” she grinned, turning back to the mirror, completely unaware of the storm behind your eyes.
Because she had no idea that the only thing keeping you from vibrating out of your skin was the image of her future brother-in-law. His voice, his hands, the pressure of him against your back, his body between your thighs, his cock filling you as he growled against your neck—
You clenched your fists again. You were not okay. And tonight, you were about to walk into a room full of people, awesome.
The bar buzzed with life. Music pulsed in waves from the overhead speakers, something upbeat and forgettable, and people swayed and shouted and laughed, glasses clinking against each other, beer sloshing onto tables and sticky wooden floors.
You were perched on a high stool at the edge of the chaos, your drink half full and your nerves stretched thin.
You’d let Kate drag you here. You hadn’t wanted to come. But the smile on her face as she danced in a small circle with her friends made it all worth it. You were here for her.
But even now, even under the dim golden lights and the noise, your mind flickered like static back to the woods. Joel’s hands. Joel’s breath. Joel’s words. Your thighs pressed together. You took a bigger sip of your drink.
“Thought that was you,” a familiar voice said behind you. You turned and saw him, Hank. That cute guy from the store. You almost forget about him, because your mind is currently full of Miller.
“Hank,” you said, forcing a tight smile, trying to hide your overthinking and zoning out every five second.
He held a drink in each hand, his leather jacket unzipped just enough to show the collar of some aggressively loud shirt underneath.
“Didn’t think I’d see you here,” he said, sliding onto the stool next to you without asking.
“Yeah… my sister dragged me out.”
“Ah,” Hank chuckled. “Lucky for me.” He slid one of the glasses toward you. Whiskey. Neat. You nodded politely. “Thanks.”
You didn’t ask for it, but you took a sip. Because refusing would be more exhausting than drinking.
Hank talked, mostly about himself. Occasionally he asked you a question, but he never waited for the answer before launching into another story. Still, it was noise. Noise was good. Noise kept you out of your head.
“You’re quiet,” Hank said, tilting his head. “You mad at me?”
You blinked back to the present.
“No,” you said quickly. “Just… tired.”
He smiled. “You need to loosen up.”
You tried to smile back. But then his hand landed on your thigh. It wasn’t casual. It was deliberate. Heavy. You froze. Your pulse quickened.
You shifted, a small movement—polite, non-threatening, clear. But he didn’t move his hand.
Instead, he leaned in closer, the alcohol on his breath making your stomach twist.
“You look so fuckin’ good tonight,” he murmured, lips brushing the shell of your ear. “Bet you feel good too.”
You jerked back. “Hank, don’t—”
He grabbed your wrist, quick and tight, and leaned in.
“Relax, sweetheart. We’re just talkin’.”
“No,” you said, firmer now. “Let go.”
His expression changed. Gone was the charm. What replaced it was flat. Cold.
“You wanna cause a scene?” he whispered.
And then you felt it. Something cold and sharp pressing against your ribs. Your eyes snapped down.
A knife. Small, dirty, folded out from a pocket tool. But real. Panic bloomed in your chest like poison.
“Let’s go,” Hank whispered, teeth clenched in a smile. “Now.”
You nodded. What else could you do?
He guided you off the stool, the knife barely brushing your side as a constant reminder. No one noticed. No one cared. The music was too loud. The lights too low.
He steered you toward the back of the bar, toward the restrooms.
Your heart thundered. Your stomach churned. You were already running through what you’d say, what you’d do, how you’d get out—
“Let her go.”
The voice split through the air like a shotgun. You turned, Hank right after you.
And there he was, your savior. Joel.
Shoulders squared, jaw clenched, eyes black with rage. His hand hovering near the holster on his hip. Not on his gun, at least, not yet.
Hank laughed. “C’mon, dude. We’re just talking.”
“I said let. her. go.”
He stepped closer. Each footfall was silent but devastating, like the pressure drop before a tornado hits. His voice had lowered now, dangerously calm.
Your breath caught. You didn’t even realize tears had formed in your eyes until you blinked and they fell.
Hank looked between you and Joel. He weighed his chances. And then, he shoved you.
You stumbled back—but before Hank could bolt, Joel moved. One hand slammed the knife out of Hank’s grip, sent it skittering across the floor.
The other grabbed the front of his jacket and shoved him into the wall so hard the drywall cracked behind him.
“You ever touch her again,” Joel growled, face inches from his, “I’ll break both your fuckin’ arms. And that’ll be merciful.”
Hank didn’t speak, didn't fight, didn't move. He was shaking, his eyes wide open like he just saw a ghost. He was so fucking scared.
Joel dropped him with a final shove and turned toward you, chest rising and falling fast. You stood there frozen, still shaking, tears streaking your cheeks now.
“Hey,” he said softly, all that rage melting into something gentler. “You alright?”
You nodded quickly. He stepped closer, slowly, as if approaching a scared animal. “Come on. I’ll take you home.”
You followed him without thinking. Out into the night. Into the truck. The door shut behind you, and silence filled the cab.
But this silence wasn’t awkward. It was heavy. Comforting. You let out a shaky breath and leaned back against the seat.
Joel didn’t speak. He just drove, his hand occasionally flexing on the wheel like he still hadn’t shaken off what he’d just done.
When the truck rolled to a stop in front of your house, you reached for the handle, but something in your chest seized. You looked over at him.
“Do you wanna come in?” you asked softly. “I… I could make some coffee. As a thank you.”
Joel hesitated. You saw it all over his face. His jaw flexed, his throat bobbed. He shouldn’t go. He knew he shouldn’t. But his eyes dropped to your lips. Just for a second, and that was enough for him to decide.
“…Yeah,” he said, voice rough. “Alright.”
You unlock the door with slightly trembling fingers, the echo of the evening still buzzing in your bones. Joel follows close behind, silent but solid, like some kind of ghost who bled warmth instead of cold.
“Make yourself comfortable,” you say softly, stepping inside and beginning to shrug off your jacket.
Joel doesn’t speak. He just nods and quietly peels off his own coat, hanging it neatly by the door. You move through the familiar space of your kitchen, the air oddly still. Behind you, you hear the chair scrape softly against the floor as he sits down at the small table.
Joel's eyes were glued on you, burning through your clothes, lingering on the curve of your spine, the swing of your hips. It’s not like before. It’s different. Hungrier.
You reach for the coffee tin without looking at him. You know exactly what kind of coffee he likes.
Which is stupid. Because this is Joel. The man you were supposed to despise. And yet here you are, pouring the water, adding just the right amount of grounds, without needing to ask a damn thing.
The silence wraps around the room, thick and buzzing with the unsaid. You can feel him watching your every move. When the coffee’s ready, you grab two mugs, pour them evenly, and walk over to him.
You set his mug down, sitting across from him, your fingers wrapping around the warmth of the ceramic. You both take the first sip in tandem. Then, quiet. The kind that presses in, like fog.
Finally, you speak. You felt like you have to, after being saved. After practically everything.
“Thanks for earlier,” you murmur, your voice a little raw. “That was… Hank.”
Joel’s jaw shifts slightly. His eyes darken. “Figured.”
You let out a dry, humorless laugh. “Didn’t think he’d be that type.”
He leans back a little, cradling the mug in one hand. “A lot of men like him are out there. Even now. You give ‘em power, they use it to corner someone weaker.”
The words sit between you, bitter like the coffee on your tongue. You nod, slowly. “How’d you even see me? No one else noticed.”
You watch the flicker of hesitation pass behind his eyes, the clench in his jaw. “I just… saw you.”
You raise an eyebrow. “In that whole crowd?”
He meets your gaze, lips twitching slightly. “What can I say? You kinda stand out.”
You smirk, mock-offended. “Was it my clothes or the way I awkwardly clung to the wall?”
He huffs a quiet laugh. “Bit of both.”
You both chuckle, and something shifts. The ice melts. The air gets warmer. It’s not like before. It’s lighter, easier, safer.
Joel finishes his coffee, setting the mug down gently. “I should get outta here. You’ve had one hell of a night.”
You nod, standing with him. “I’ll walk you to the door.”
But as you turn to lead him out, your sock catches on the edge of the rug and your balance tips.
“Shit—!”
You stumble forward, instinctively reaching out, but Joel is already there—his arms snapping around you, pulling you tightly against him.
Your chest slams into his, and his hands steady you, one firm on your waist, the other wrapped just under your ribs.
You’re both laughing at first. A light, breathy kind of laugh, like the end of a good joke. But then you look up at him. And suddenly, it’s not funny anymore.
His face is so close. Again. Like in the woods.
Your noses almost touch. His breath brushes your cheek. One of his hands tightens slightly on your hip, grounding you. His other hand firm against your back, your palms flat against his chest.
You looked up into his eyes, and for a moment, nothing else in the world existed. Just the two of you, breathing the same charged air, close enough to feel the heat rolling off each other. You didn’t know if it was a good idea. Hell, it probably wasn’t. This would ruin everything. Complicate the wedding. Complicate Jackson. Complicate… him. You.
But you didn’t move. Neither did he.
His eyes kept dropping, from your eyes to your lips, back up again, then down. Every time he looked at your mouth, it felt like fire ran through your veins. His thumb brushed along your spine like he was grounding himself, and you swore your knees nearly gave out from just that.
Then, like something broke inside him, he kissed you.
It was sudden, deep, and full of something too big for either of you to name. It wasn’t soft, not really. It was controlled. His mouth moved against yours like he was trying to remember how to be careful. But the second he felt you lean into it, tilt your head and let out that quiet, needful sound from the back of your throat, he was done.
He pulled back just a fraction, like he was afraid to have gone too far. Like he was waiting for you to push him away.
But instead, you grabbed the collar of his shirt and yanked him back in like a wild thing that had been starving for this. Your lips crashed into his and there was no more hesitation, no more thinking.
Only need.
The kiss turned feverish — teeth, tongues, breathless groans swallowed between your mouths. His hands were everywhere — gripping your waist, sliding under the hem of your shirt, fingers pressing into your skin like he needed to memorize every inch.
You couldn’t stop. Didn’t want to. Your body was reacting like it had waited a lifetime for this. You were pressed up against him, feeling the hardness straining against his jeans, the way his hips rolled into yours with unconscious desperation.
Somehow, you stumbled backwards through the hallway, bumping into walls, laughing through your gasps and moans as he kissed your neck, your jaw, your mouth again. His hands slid down your thighs and lifted you up like you weighed nothing, your legs wrapping around his waist.
His mouth never left yours, the kissing is harder now—urgent, uneven. The hallway dimly lit by the golden hue of a single lamp in your kitchen blurred behind you as he carried you toward your bedroom.
Your fingers twisted into the collar of his shirt, knuckles white, and his breath hitched when your teeth grazed his bottom lip. His hips pressed into you as you gasped softly into his mouth, your thighs squeezing around him. The friction made your body jolt with a pulse of heat that spread through your stomach like wildfire.
He kicked the door to your room open, then brought you down to the bed. Not gently. Not softly. There was no time for that.
Your bodies hit the mattress with a thud, your hair splaying out beneath you like a dark halo. He hovered above you for just a second, both of you panting, eyes locked, your chests rising and falling in unison. Then his hands were on you again—rough, wide palms pushing under your shirt, dragging it up. His touch was everywhere. Greedy. Desperate.
You sat up to help him, tearing the shirt over your head and tossing it somewhere behind you. Joel’s gaze dropped to your chest, dark and feral, his breath catching hard as if he’d just been punched in the stomach. His hands, already trembling slightly, moved with surprising reverence as he reached behind you to unclasp your bra.
It slid down your arms slowly, and the moment your chest was bare, Joel exhaled shakily like he was in physical pain. Like he’d been imagining this for far too long. He didn’t say anything, didn’t need to. His expression was torn between reverence and hunger. You watched his throat bob as he swallowed thickly.
Then, his hands came up to cup you.
They were big, calloused, and the contrast of his roughness against the softness of your skin made you shudder. He traced the curves with his thumbs, gentle at first, then firmer when he saw how your body arched into his touch. Your breath caught again, a small, sharp sound that broke the silence like a dropped glass.
Joel leaned in, lips parting as he pressed his mouth to the swell of one breast, then to your nipple, hot, wet, insistent. Your head fell back with a whimper as his mouth worked in slow, teasing circles. His hand kneaded the other breast, his thumb flicking expertly, rhythmically, and your legs began to shift restlessly beneath him.
Your fingers found his hair, tugging.
Not to stop him, to beg for more. The sensation was overwhelming, grounding and floating you at the same time. He groaned low into your skin, and you felt the sound vibrate through your ribs, down your spine. Your hips lifted off the bed involuntarily, searching for contact, for pressure, for anything.
Joel paused only to look up at you—his lips shiny, his expression undone. You couldn’t breathe. He looked like sin, and you wanted to drown in it. His hand slid down your side slowly, possessively, as if mapping you. Memorizing you.
With a firm but gentle hand, he urges you backward until your spine meets the mattress. You obey without protest, eyes locked on his, heart thundering in your chest. He follows you down, hovering above you, and then he’s on you again, his mouth returning to your chest, latching onto a sensitive nipple like he’s starving for it.
His tongue swirls, wet and deliberate, flicking over the peak until you whimper. Then he sucks, slow and deep, and your back arches as pleasure shoots through you like a live wire.
“Good girl,” he murmurs against your skin, voice gravelly and full of reverence. “So fuckin’ sweet.”
Your thighs press together as heat pools between them. You can barely focus, your hands fisting into the sheets as he alternates between each breast—suckling, kissing, grazing them with the barest edge of his teeth. Every touch makes you writhe, your body hypersensitive, your breath short.
You moan his name, barely a whisper, and he growls softly in response. His lips are warm, skilled, knowing. There’s nothing rushed in his worship; he’s savoring every second, and it drives you wild.
Eventually, his mouth releases you, leaving your skin damp and flushed. But he doesn’t move far—only lower, lower still, lips grazing a path down your torso. He leaves a kiss beneath your ribs, then another just below your navel. Each one sets off sparks in your belly. Your breath hitches as he pauses, right above the hem of your panties.
He glances up, eyes catching yours. “You want this?”
Your nod is immediate, shaky. ���Yes.”
He hooks his fingers beneath the fabric of your panties, dragging them down your thighs with excruciating slowness. As he slips them off, he holds your gaze, and then he brings the panties to his lips, kisses the damp center, and tucks them into his back pocket with a smug glint in his eye.
And then he lowers his head again.
You barely have time to process before his mouth is on you—warm, wet, divine. His tongue dips between your folds, exploring you with devastating thoroughness. He licks a slow stripe up your slit, groaning against you like he’s the one being pleasured.
His tongue is rough, textured, dragging deliciously across your most sensitive parts. Every flick, every swirl, every subtle change in rhythm makes your hips lift off the bed, your thighs trembling around his head.
He moans into you like you taste like salvation. One of his hands pins your hip down gently, the other resting on your thigh, keeping you open for him.
“Fuck, baby,” he breathes between licks, “you’re drippin’. So damn perfect.”
Your hands fly to his hair, fingers threading through the strands, anchoring yourself as your body threatens to unravel. Every sound you make, every twitch and gasp, seems to fuel him. He buries his face deeper, devouring you like he’s memorizing the way you taste, the way you tremble.
And god, you can’t stop moaning—his name, half-formed pleas, incoherent gasps. You can’t think. All you can do is feel.
You’re flushed, your legs shaking, your chest rising and falling in ragged breaths. He slides his tongue over your clit, slow and firm, circling it in ways that make your toes curl.
His mind is a mess of craving and possessiveness. He wants to make you come on his tongue, over and over, until you forget anyone but him has ever touched you. You can feel it in every movement, every low sound he makes against you—he’s not just giving you pleasure. He’s claiming you.
The pressure builds fast and fierce, and your thighs clamp tighter around his head. He doesn’t stop. He just groans into your heat, sending vibrations through you that make you cry out, teetering right on the edge.
And just before you fall, he pulls back slightly, eyes glazed with lust, lips glistening.
“You gonna come for me, sweetheart?” he whispers.
“Yes—Joel, please—”
He just smiled devilishly, before his mouth is on you again, relentless. And you break. Your orgasm slams into you like a wave crashing over your body. It’s not soft or sweet—it’s violent, intense, a full-body convulsion that steals your breath and bends your spine off the mattress.
Your mouth opens in a scream, but all that comes out is a strangled moan, broken and raw. Your thighs tighten around Joel’s head, trembling uncontrollably, and your fingers yank at his hair as if anchoring yourself to reality.
The pleasure rips through your core in sharp, overwhelming pulses. Each one sends another shock down your spine, through your arms, your legs, your fingertips. Your vision whitens at the edges. You can’t hear anything but the pounding of your own heart, your ragged gasps, and the obscene wet sounds of his mouth still working you through every last wave.
Joel groans like a man starved, like you are the only thing that’s ever mattered. He doesn’t stop until you’re whimpering from overstimulation, your whole body twitching beneath him. When he finally pulls back, his beard is damp, his lips swollen and slick, his chest heaving.
“Jesus,” he mutters, wiping his mouth with the back of his hand, eyes glued to you. “You’re fuckin’ beautiful when you come.”
Your chest rises and falls rapidly, your pulse thudding in your ears. The room tilts a little as you try to breathe through the aftershocks. Everything feels too much, your skin is flushed and hypersensitive, your muscles limp and tingling. You can barely keep your eyes open.
“Joel…” you whisper, dazed. You blink up at him just in time to see his hands at his belt. He unbuckles it slowly, eyes locked on yours the entire time, like he’s daring you to look away.
You don’t.
The sound of the leather sliding free is sinful—low, threatening, full of promise. He lets it fall to the floor with a soft thud, then pops the button of his jeans and drags the zipper down.
You watch, helpless to do anything else. He’s broad, powerful, and glowing with heat—shoulders wide, stomach lined with a thick trail of hair that disappears beneath the waistband he’s tugging down. His cock springs free, thick, flushed, already leaking, and your mouth waters just looking at him.
But he’s not done.
He shrugs off his shirt slowly, working each button free with frustrating patience. And when he peels the fabric off his shoulders and tosses it aside, you nearly forget how to breathe.
All muscle and scars and raw masculinity. His chest is dusted with dark hair, his abdomen hard and sculpted, veins visible on his forearms as he braces himself above you. There’s a faint sheen of sweat on his skin, making every dip and ridge of his body gleam under the soft light.
You stare, dazed and aching, lips parted as your eyes trace every inch of him.
“Like what you see?” he asks, voice rough, almost teasing, but there’s a strain there. He’s barely holding it together. You nod, unable to speak.
And he smirks, just a little, before leaning down to kiss you again, the heat of his bare skin pressing against yours. Then, he crawled up your body, eyes dark, jaw clenched. His control is fraying, shredded to the edge. You can see it in the way his arms tremble slightly, in how fast he’s breathing.
“I can’t wait anymore,” he growls, forehead pressed to yours. “I need to be inside you. Now.”
You nod frantically, legs already parting for him.
He doesn’t even bother with teasing. He just grabs himself. Thick, hard, flushed at the tip, and guides his cock between your thighs, rubbing the head slowly through your slick folds. He groans at the contact, voice shaking.
“Fuck… You’re so wet for me.”
And then, he pushes in. The stretch is unreal. You gasp, eyes flying open as he sinks into you inch by inch. He’s thick, hot, and pulsing with need. Your walls clench around him automatically, your nails digging into his back as he slowly pushes deeper.
“Jesus Christ,” he hisses, every muscle in his body rigid. “You feel like heaven.”
The sensation is overwhelming. Your body tries to adjust, but he’s so big, so deep already. You bite your lip, crying out when he bottoms out, pelvis pressing flush against yours.
You’re full. Stuffed. You feel every vein, every twitch of him inside you.
Joel doesn’t move at first, just leans over you, forearms braced on either side of your head, chest heaving as he fights to keep control. His forehead rests against yours, sweat starting to gather at his temples.
“You okay?” he murmurs.
You nod, breathless. “Yeah. Please—Joel, move.”
That’s all he needs. He starts slow—long, deep thrusts that make your breath stutter, your nails dig into his skin. The sounds of your bodies fill the room: skin against skin, your wetness coating him with every stroke, the soft gasp and grunt of every movement.
But it doesn’t stay slow for long.
Joel groans low in his throat and suddenly snaps his hips forward—hard. You yelp, eyes rolling back. He does it again. And again. Then he loses the last of his restraint.
He fucks you hard, fast, mercilessly. The rhythm ruthless, pounding into you so deep your legs shake around his waist. The bed creaks beneath you, the headboard knocking softly against the wall, but you barely register it.
You can only feel him—his cock driving into you with unrelenting force, your pussy clenching with every thrust.
His grip on your hips tightens, bruising. He watches your face twist with pleasure, your mouth open in gasps and cries, your fingers clawing at his shoulders.
“That’s it,” he pants, voice hoarse. “Take it. Just like that. Good fuckin’ girl.”
You can barely form words. Your mind is gone, wrecked, your entire world narrowed to the feeling of him inside you—stretching, filling, owning every part of you.
He leans down, capturing your mouth again, and fucks you so hard you feel like you’re going to shatter around him.
Then, he pulls out slowly, just for a second, only to flip you onto your stomach.
You barely register the motion before his hands are on your hips, strong and commanding, dragging your ass up until you’re on your knees, chest still against the mattress.
You whimper at the loss of him, but then he’s there again—his cock thick and hot as he drags it through your slick folds from behind.
“Joel—” you breathe, barely able to form the word.
“I can't hold back,” he mutters, voice like gravel. “Need you. Need this.”
He thrusts back into you with no warning, making you scream into the sheets.
He’s so deep, so thick, the angle making it feel impossibly intense, like he’s splitting you open all over again.
Your arms give out, your face pressing into the mattress as he starts to move. And it’s brutal. No finesse, no patience. Just raw, driving thrusts that shake your whole body.
He’s fucking you like a man possessed. Like he’s trying to bury himself so deep you’ll never forget the shape of him. You won’t.
His grip on your hips is bruising, fingertips digging into your flesh as he slams into you again and again. Your skin stings, your scalp prickles—until suddenly, he grabs a handful of your hair, yanks your head back, and you sob at the mix of pain and pleasure.
“You take it so fuckin’ well,” he growls behind you, breath hot against your ear. “You were made for me.”
Tears spill from your eyes, uncontrollably, shamelessly. From the intensity, from the feeling of being completely and utterly taken. Your body can’t keep up. You’re trembling, overwhelmed, moaning brokenly as every thrust punches another cry from your throat.
He leans over you, rutting into you deeper now, rougher. His chest presses against your back, one arm wrapping around your waist to keep you pinned in place while the other stays tangled in your hair.
You feel yourself spiraling again, your second orgasm rising so fast it almost hurts. Your vision blurs, the mattress soaked with your tears as you sob, “Joel, please, I’m—God—I’m gonna—”
“I know, baby,” he pants into your neck. “Come for me. Wanna feel you fall apart.”
It tears through you like lightning, your body locking up before shattering into trembling convulsions. You scream—loud, raw, broken—back arching hard against him. You’re gushing, pulsing around him, your slick flooding down your thighs as your body clenches around his cock.
You’re sobbing, half-coherent, and Joel curses—low and wrecked.
“Fuck—fuck—you’re squeezin’ me so goddamn tight—”
He’s close. You can feel it in the way he moves, the frantic pace, the desperation in every thrust.
Then his hips stutter. He growls your name like a curse and slams into you one final time, burying himself to the hilt as he comes.
It’s not soft—it’s violent. His entire body shudders behind you, his hands gripping you like you’re the only solid thing keeping him grounded. You can feel the heat of him spilling inside you, filling you up as he lets out a low, strangled moan against your skin.
You both collapse.
Joel slumps over your back, breathing hard, his body heavy and trembling with aftershocks. Your legs are jelly, your vision blurry with tears and sweat, your heart pounding against the mattress like it’s trying to break free.
Everything’s quiet, except for your breathing, your sobs slowly calming, and the soft curses Joel whispers as he presses his lips to your shoulder, over and over again. His body still draped over yours, his chest rising and falling in uneven breaths. You can feel his heartbeat pounding against your back, can feel the way his arms tighten around your waist as if he’s afraid you’ll disappear.
Eventually, he shifts—pulls out of you gently, muttering something soft against your shoulder that you can’t quite make out. You’re too dazed, too shattered, your limbs heavy and slow like you’ve been drugged. He disappears for a moment.
You barely lift your head when he returns with a towel. Joel doesn’t say a word. He just nudges your legs apart, cleans you carefully, almost reverently.
His touch is gentle, surprisingly so. No roughness, no urgency. Just patient, quiet care. He wipes between your thighs, along your trembling skin, and when you flinch from sensitivity, he whispers, “Shh, I got you,” like it’s the most natural thing in the world.
You don’t look at him. You can’t.
Once he’s done, he tosses the towel aside and pulls the blanket up over both of you. You barely notice him crawling in beside you until you feel the weight of his arm wrap around your waist, tugging you back into his chest.
Your eyelids are heavy.
Your body is sore, humming with satisfaction and confusion and something dangerously close to contentment. His warmth seeps into your spine, his breath soft at the nape of your neck. You think he might kiss your shoulder again, but he doesn’t. He just holds you, skin to skin, until you drift off to sleep in his arms.
It’s been three days.
Three days since you let Joel Miller into your home. Three days since you let him see you—all of you. Three days since he touched you like you were something sacred and ruined you all at once.
Tomorrow, your sister’s getting married. Tomorrow, she becomes a Miller. But tonight… tonight is the last night she’ll fall asleep with your name still matching hers.
And all you can think about is him.
Not the ceremony. Not the dress. Not the decorations you spent hours picking out.
Only him. Only that night.
The taste of his mouth. The feel of his body. The way he said your name like a prayer and a curse all at once.
It should’ve been nothing. A mistake. A one-time moment of insanity. You could’ve stopped it. Should’ve. But you didn’t. You let him in. You invited the devil to your doorstep, and you didn’t slam the door in his face.
You let him fuck you like you meant something. And worse—you liked it. You hate yourself for that. Because now? Now you can’t even look at him.
He tries. You see it. A polite nod, a soft “hey,” a wave from across the street. You ignore it all. You keep your eyes down. Pretend not to hear him. Pretend he doesn’t exist—because if you don’t, if you let yourself remember even a second of what happened that night, your chest might split open.
He saw you. Really saw you. And he did things to you no one’s ever done before. Things you didn’t know you wanted, let alone needed.
And now… he’s just walking around Jackson like nothing happened. Like he’s fine.
But you’re not.
You’re a mess. A storm barely contained behind a polite smile. Because every time you shut your eyes, he’s there. That mouth. Those hands. That voice in your ear whispering “good girl” as you came around his tongue.
What the hell were you thinking?
Sleeping with your sister’s future brother-in-law? With your enemy? It sounds like a sick joke. A bad decision spun wildly out of control. And the worst part? You’d do it all over again in a heartbeat.
You should’ve said no.
When Kate looked at you with those sparkling eyes, veil clipped into her hair, all glowing and giddy and “Can you do me a favor?” You should’ve said it right there. No. But you didn’t.
Because tomorrow she gets married. Tomorrow she becomes someone’s wife, and you’d cut off your own arm to make sure her day is perfect. So now you’re stuck in Joel Miller’s truck. Alone. With him.
You sit curled up on the passenger side, arms crossed, body tense like a coiled spring. You haven’t spoken since you got in. Haven’t looked at him once. He tries though.
“Hey,” he said when you climbed in. “You look… nice.” You didn’t answer.
“You sleep alright last night?”
You made a noncommittal grunt and turned your face to the window.
He’s still trying, glancing over occasionally, fingers drumming on the steering wheel like he’s searching for the right rhythm to break the silence. But you give him nothing.
Because what the hell is there to say? That you still feel his hands on your body when you close your eyes? That your throat tightens when you hear his voice, because it reminds you of how it sounded whispering filth in your ear while he ruined you? That your entire body clenches at the thought of him inside you again?
No, there’s nothing to say. But the universe doesn’t give a fuck about timing. Because just as you pass the city limits, the sky cracks open. One fat drop hits the windshield. Then another. Then it’s a full-on storm.
Rain lashes at the glass, fast and blinding, and Joel slows down immediately. Thunder growls somewhere above, deep and low like the sound of something ancient waking up.
“Shit,” he mutters. “Gotta pull over.”
He steers the truck down an overgrown path and finds an old garage, half-collapsed, but enough to get out of the worst of the storm. The rain slams into the tin roof above you, loud and wild. You’re safe, but it feels suffocating.
Joel turns off the engine. Silence falls, except for the storm. He exhales slowly, then speaks.
“You gonna keep pretendin’ I don’t exist?” he asks quietly.
That’s it. You snap. You whip your head toward him, the heat in your chest rising like boiling water. “What do you want me to say, Joel?!”
He blinks. You’re already throwing the door open, going straight to the rain. You needed a fresh air, one that doesn't smell like Joel's car. His door slams right behind you.
“What are you—,”
“Hey, remember that time you fucked me senseless and now I can’t breathe without thinking about it?” You step out into the rain. “That I feel like a complete idiot because I invited you in and now I can’t even look at myself in the mirror?!”
The cold hits you like a slap, rain soaking your clothes instantly. You welcome it. He follows, his voice sharp through the downpour. “I didn’t plan it either! You think I woke up that morning hopin’ to lose my fuckin’ mind over you?!”
You spin on him. “You didn’t stop me!”
“I couldn’t!” he shouts back, eyes wild, hair already soaked. “You looked at me like you wanted it. Like no one ever looked at me before and I couldn’t—” He stops himself, jaw tight.
You stare at him. The rain pours around you, drumming on the roof, the truck, the gravel. Your chest heaves. Your teeth clench. Everything is raw, exposed, trembling.
“This was a mistake,” you say, but your voice breaks halfway through. He steps closer.
“You don’t believe that.”
“I have to,” you whisper.
Joel’s hands reach out slowly, like approaching a wounded animal. His palms settle on your wet cheeks. “Look I get it…,” he says softly, “but I ain’t sorry for what we did, and I defenitely do not regret it.”
Your breath catches.
“Do you?” He asked, his brown chocolate eyes made your knees weak, and you knew the answer damn well, but it was just hard. Hard to admit that you have feelings for Joel fucking Miller. That you feel something more, and unfortunately, it's not hatress.
“I don't—” you start, but then he kisses you.
Hard. Desperate. Wet mouths clashing in the rain like something out of a dream you’d never admit to having. His hands hold your face like he’s terrified you’ll vanish. Your fingers dig into his shirt, nails catching fabric. There’s nothing gentle about it.
It’s all tongue and teeth and years of hate folding into hunger. You kiss him like you’re punishing him. He kisses you like he’s begging for mercy.
When you finally break apart, you’re both panting.
Foreheads pressed together. Rain dripping from your lashes. His hands stay on your face. Yours clutch his jacket.
“I’m so fucking mad at you,” you whisper.
Joel smiles. “Yeah. I know.”
The morning sun filters in through sheer curtains, soft and golden, bathing the room in light that feels almost sacred.
Kate stands by the mirror, surrounded by laughter, perfume, and a blur of ivory fabric and flowers. Her wedding dress hugs her figure perfectly—delicate lace at the shoulders, tiny buttons running down the back, and a soft, flowing skirt that pools like clouds around her feet. Her hair is curled and pinned, a few loose strands framing her glowing face, and in her hands is a bouquet of wildflowers tied with satin.
She looks like something out of a dream. You watch her, heart pounding, throat tight with nerves. It’s now or never.
“Kate,” you say gently, stepping forward.
She turns to you, bright-eyed. “Yeah?”
Your hands are shaking. You swallow hard. “I need to tell you something. And I should’ve told you sooner, I just… I didn’t know how.”
She blinks. “What is it?”
You inhale slowly. “It’s about me and Joel.”
She was quiet, her eyes full of expectations and lips sucked nervously into a thin line.
“Me and Joel are… kinda together,” you sigh, heart hammering in your chest, fully expecting a meltdown. But instead, she squeals.
“Oh my god, why didn’t you tell me sooner?! This is—this is amazing!” She throws her arms around you, nearly knocking your breath out. “I knew there was something! You’ve been acting so weird! But this, this makes me so happy!”
You’re stunned. “Wait… you’re not mad?”
She pulls back and beams. “Mad? Are you kidding? I ship this. Hard.”
You burst into laughter, nearly crying from the relief.
“You’re insane,” you whisper, wiping your eyes.
“I’m your sister, it’s my job,” she grins.
The wedding ceremony is set beneath an arch of flowers, surrounded by rows of chairs filled with friends and family. The sun is just starting to dip lower, casting long shadows, the sky streaked with pink and lavender.
You stand at the altar as a bridesmaid, bouquet clutched tightly in your hands. You’ve never worn a dress like this before—it’s soft, elegant, pale lavender—and your hair is pinned back, a few curls brushing your cheek. Your palms are sweaty. Your heart’s full.
Across from you, Joel stands in a dark suit, tie slightly loosened, that damn rugged charm still impossible to ignore. And then, the music starts. Everyone rises. You turn your head, and there she is.
Kate walks slowly down the aisle, hand wrapped around your father’s arm, veil trailing behind her like a whisper. Her eyes are wide, lips trembling with a smile, and she looks so happy, like every fairytale in the world decided to make a cameo in her life today.
You feel it before you realize it, tears welling in your eyes. You blink rapidly, but they fall anyway, slipping down your cheeks in quiet streaks.
Then you glance sideways. Joel isn’t looking at the bride. He’s looking at you.
His eyes are soft. Warm. His lips curve into the smallest smile—just for you. One corner up, the kind that says I’m here. I see you. I’m yours.
You smile back, heart blooming.
And in that moment, standing in the golden light of your sister’s wedding, mascara streaking your cheeks, hands still trembling from the weight of it all, you realize you’re exactly where you’re meant to be.
With him. With all of it. And finally, finally, it feels like the chaos was worth it.
Hii! Thank you so much for reading!
I hope you guys enjoyed it! If you have any suggestions, don’t hesitate to let me know! I’d also be super happy for any feedback; whether it’s a reblog, comment, like, or even a follow.
Have a lovely day!
LOVE YA! 🥮🍂
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Nothing Worth Saying Aloud
Logan Howlett x fem reader

A/N: This one is short n' sweet! Inspired by the song "Need 2" by Pinegrove which I had first heard because I read this one shot that used that song as inspiration! Theirs is much better I'll be real but I had this festering in my brain for too long every time I'd play that song on repeat
Summary: Misunderstanding and miscommunication makes for a terrible combination that leaves you feeling like you've had your heart ripped from your chest
Warnings: Angsty as all hell, a lil' bit of fluff at the end, that's really it!
Word Count: 2K
𖥔 ִ ་ ، ˖ ࣪ ་ ˖ ʿ𖥔 ִ ་ ، ˖ ࣪ ་ ˖ ʿ𖥔 ִ ་ ، ˖ ࣪ ་ ˖ ʿ𖥔 ִ ་ ، ˖ ࣪ ་ ˖ ʿ𖥔 ִ ་ ، ˖ ࣪ ་ ˖ ʿ𖥔 ִ ་ ، ˖ ࣪ ་
You’d gone through a couple break ups in your life, a handful of failed situation-ships that ended awkwardly - even a long term relationship or two - but all the heartbreak you’d experienced couldn’t compare to the chest-crushing agony you experienced now.
The terrible moment of facing the music; accepting what couldn’t be, even if you wanted it more than anything.
Logan was not into you and he was never going to be.
You had to confront that when you’d gone down the stairs of the mansion one night to get a glass of water, almost certain you were the only person awake. That was until you’d stopped short in the hallway, seeing Logan and Jean standing with their backs to you. You couldn’t hear their conversation and didn’t think anything of it until you watched his arm snake around her shoulders, pulling her into him for a hug.
Your stomach sank. You really should have known.
The way he talks to her, looks at her, is always there to help her; it must have been obvious to anyone but you. You’d been friends for so long that you were almost dumbfounded that you never realized, probably too blinded by your own rose colored glasses.
You turned on your heel immediately, climbing the stairs to hide in your bedroom. Your chest felt heavy and your skin felt like it was on fire. You never ended up sleeping that night, too sick to think of anything else but Jean and Logan.
That was maybe two weeks ago now and you’d avoided Logan every day since as best you could. You’d gone from being nearly inseparable to speaking only when you had to. He’d try his best to get you to talk to him about anything at all but you only gave him one word answers. He even tried to keep you after training one day, gently having a hold on your bicep.
“Hey, what’s going on with you?” He asked bluntly. He tried to look you in the eyes but they were nearly glued to the metal floor of the basement corridor, your hair falling in your face.
“Nothing’s wrong. I’m fine, Logan, really,” you were able to mutter out, somehow keeping your voice from cracking. Before he could interrogate you further, you shrugged yourself out of his soft grip and speed-walked to the elevator, tears flowing the second you turned away from him.
You were not fine. Your eyes were always red and puffy from crying yourself to sleep and everyone could tell something was off.
Ororo even stopped you in the hallway outside your bedroom one night, begging you to tell her what was wrong and what she could do to help.
“It’s nothing, I - “ you had started to dismiss her, but she was having none of it.
“Stop with that! Enough! You need to tell me what’s up or I’m gonna have to force it out of you somehow and you know I do not wanna do that. Now tell me.”
You sighed, never picking your gaze up from the floor.
“Come here, I don’t want anyone to hear me,” you beckoned her into your room.
She sat by your side at the edge of the bed as you confessed what you had seen and how badly it had torn you apart, rubbing your back gently when you choked out a sob.
“Honey,” she cooed, pushing some hair from your face and wiping a tear away, “I think you need to talk to him. This is gonna eat you up inside if you don’t and I think maybe it could’ve been a misunderstanding.”
“I don’t know, ‘ro. I can’t even look at him without feeling like I’m gonna burst into tears,” you sniffled, wiping your eyes with the collar of your t-shirt.
“Think about it. I can’t tell you what to do, but I think you really should. And if it was what it looked like, sweetheart, this is not the end of the world,” she reminded you.
“It sure does feel like it,” you joked, tears still rolling down your cheeks.
“I know,” she sighed, patting your back gently, “talk to him.”
You nodded and she left the room, reminding you to come find her if you needed anything at all.
You thought her words over and ultimately still hid in your room the next day, skipping training to rot in bed in sweatpants and a tank top. The thought of having to confess to Logan that you were really in love with him was far too paralyzing. It almost made you sick If you thought about it too long.
You knew it wasn’t a good idea to keep shuffling sad songs on repeat and yet you did, keeping your CD player at a low volume so you wouldn’t bother anyone and they wouldn’t bother you. Your hair was a mess and you were glad that at the very least, you’d had enough energy to shower that morning after three days of not doing so. You held your knees to your chest while laying on your side, burying your face into your pillow to muffle your wailing sobs.
Logan was downstairs at the same time, making his way towards the stairs, only to run into Scott.
“Hey, can I ask you something?” Logan spoke, stopping him with a hand on his upper arm.
Even through Scott’s glasses, Logan could tell he was glaring suspiciously.
“About what? Why?”
Logan said your name, looking around to be sure they were alone in the hallway.
Scott’s expression softened and he leaned against the wall, waiting for him to explain.
“Do you know what’s up with her? She won’t talk to me, she hasn’t in two weeks. She won’t even look at me. Has she said anything to you?” Logan spewed out, rubbing the back of his neck as a nervous tic.
“No, your girlfriend didn’t mention anything,” he teased, shaking his head, “but hey, just talk to her. You’ve been close for a while now, you just have to confront her.”
“She’s not my - okay, whatever. Yeah, I’m gonna go talk to her. Maybe she’s in her room,” Logan sighed.
“She’s always in her room lately. If there’s anyone that can pull her out of it, it would be you.”
He quickly thanked Scott and finally reached the stairs. He had been walking through the hall, finding your bedroom door and stopping when he heard a noise he couldn’t quite make out. He heard you sniffle and his heart dropped.
You were crying.
He tried to give you your space, work through whatever it was that was bothering you, but it broke him to see you the way you were and his prodding didn’t seem to help. Still, he didn’t know how much longer he could let you dodge him in the halls or live with the fact that you wouldn’t even look at him anymore. He had planned to talk to you that day, but you rarely came out of your room now.
So, he laid a hand on your doorknob, turning it slowly. He would’ve knocked - he always did - but every time he had recently, you laid silent and pretended not to be in the room. He always knew you were, recognizing the smell of your perfume behind the door.
The door cracked open a few inches and he saw you, curled in a ball in your bed with your face in your pillow. Your shoulders moved up and down as you sobbed, gripping the pillow so hard that your knuckles turned white.
There’s no way Logan could leave you like this. He slid into the room and closed the door gently, but you could hear the click of the knob over your music.
Your head shot up and you saw Logan standing with his back to your door, an almost devastated look on his face.
“Oh god, Logan, please, don’t - “ you choked out, turning your face so he couldn’t see you and waving him away. Out of everyone you wanted to see right now, he was at the bottom of the list because this was humiliating.
He’d seen your bloodshot eyes and pink nose, your cheeks wet with tears. There was no way you could tell him you weren’t crying.
“You have to talk to me. Please, what did I do?”
The last thing you wanted was for him to think it was all his fault. It wasn’t, really. He didn’t do anything to hurt you on purpose; He couldn’t have known it would upset you in the slightest or that you were even in the hallway that night.
“Nothing, Logan, please, just go away - “ you begged, still facing away with your face buried in your hands.
“I’m not leaving till you tell me what’s going on,” he said firmly, “you won’t even look at me. I don’t know what I did, but I’m sorry. Whatever it is, I’ll make it up to you.”
You still had your face buried in your hands when you felt the bed dip as he came to sit beside you.
“I miss you, you know. You won’t train with me anymore, you won’t come out with me, you won't talk to me. Please, I don’t know what to apologize for if you don’t tell me.”
His voice so close to you made your heart ache. You wanted to just hug him, tell him you missed him too, but you sat paralyzed. He really wasn’t going anywhere until you said something.
You removed your hands from your face, wiping away the tears with the back of your hand. You took a long inhale, closing your eyes and trying not to let your voice crack.
“It’s nothing worth me saying aloud,” you muttered, gnawing on your bottom lip. You felt like you needed to, though - like a lump in your throat that you couldn’t cough up.
“Please,” Logan’s voice was quiet, his hand arm coming to rest around your waist.
You squeezed your eyes shut and scrunched your face in an attempt not to cry even harder when he touched you. You had wanted him to for so long, but not like this.
You inhaled sharply, standing up as you did so to pace around your room. You couldn’t sit still with his hand on you.
“I - “, you tried to speak, the words getting lodged in your throat, “ it’s not your fault. I’m not mad at you, it’s not that.”
“Then, what? Tell me. You know I’d do anything to help.”
He would, and that’s what made it all hurt so much worse; how sweet he could be to you. You reminded yourself that he was also probably like that with Jean and you shook your head in an attempt to rid yourself of the thought.
“It’s so stupid, Logan, really - “
“Pretty girl, it’s not stupid if it’s making you cry.”
Pretty girl. He probably called her that too.
Fuck, you couldn’t get it out of your head no matter how bad you wished you could.
“Ugh,” you groaned, leaning your head back to stare at the ceiling. Maybe it would be easier to spit it out when you weren’t looking at him. You took a deep breath, preparing yourself to get it all out in one go.
“A couple weeks ago, I went downstairs in the middle of the night and I saw you and Jean.”
You couldn’t see his expression, but Logan’s eyebrows were furrowed, completely lost on what exactly it was that you saw.
“And it’s so fucking stupid, I know, but I - “, you choked back a sob, “fuck. Logan, I love you. I’m sorry. I’m in love with you, I don’t know how to handle it, not when I know nothings ever gonna happen.”
When you didn’t hear a response, you dreaded the moment you finally tore your eyes from your ceiling. Logan was still in the same spot at the edge of the bed, a dumbfounded expression on his face.
“Sweet heart - “, he began, but it only hurt you more to hear him call you stuff like that.
“Logan, please, I know, just - I don’t want it to be a big deal and you don’t have to give me the rejection speech, trust me.”
“Are you gonna let me explain?” His tone was mildly frustrated, though he was still clearly worried about you.
You sighed, hands on your hips as you stood almost completely across the room. He got up to meet you where you were. He wanted to put his hands on your shoulders but he could tell you didn’t want to be touched.
“Explain what?” You muttered, gaze glued to the floor when he stood in front of you.
“There’s nothing going on between Jean and I.”
Seeing that your expression never changed, he continued.
“I think I know what you saw. I hugged Jean, that’s what you’re talking about, right?”
You swallowed hard, dreading any details he wanted to spill. You still didn’t believe that there was nothing, convinced he was lying to save your feelings. You nodded anyway, still looking at the floor.
“I gave Jean a hug because her and Scott got into a fight. She said she fucked up and wanted my advice, I hugged her and that was all. Honey, I’m telling you, nothings going on.”
You were nearly turning pink at the realization that he was being truthful.
“And another thing,” he began again, tentatively pulling your hands from your hips so he could hold them in his, “you think I don’t love you?”
You finally met his gaze then and his heart broke when he saw your watery eyes. He brought a hand up to wipe your tears, leaving it there to cup your face while his other still held your hand.
“I love you. I’m in love with you, too. I don’t feel that way about Jean at all. I thought it was obvious, but I guess neither of us have the greatest communication skills, huh?” He laughed a little, nervously waiting for you to finally say something.
You were still soaking in his words, first about Jean and then about you.
“Really?” You squeaked, unable to say anything more.
“Really, baby,” he said sweetly, continuing to wipe away your tears.
You sniffled and leaned into his touch, happy to just be near him again.
“I missed you too, you know. I miss everything about you. I just couldn’t look at you when I thought - I don’t know, when I thought you couldn’t love me like that. Oh god, I’m so stupid, Logan, I’m so sorry - “ you began to apologize and he cut you off, shaking his head.
“None of that, c’mere,” he pulled you into him gently, wrapping his arms around your waist and leaning down to hug you.
You smiled into his t-shirt. You missed the smell of his cologne, the warmth of him, the way he called you sweet names. You had your arms wrapped around his neck, standing on your toes to do so.
“I love you, Princess. I’m so glad I get to say it,” he mumbled into your hair, neither one of you letting go of the other, “and I’m a dumbass for not saying something sooner and letting you think all that.”
“No, I’m a dumbass because I should’ve said something sooner instead of assuming. I was just terrified, I guess.”
“No more being terrified, right?” He pulled away a little to look in your eyes.
You nodded, a smile on your face for the first time in weeks. You both stood there in the middle of your bedroom, frozen in an embrace with your eyes locked on each other.
“Can I kiss you?” He whispered, his hand rubbing up and down your back reassuringly, “you can say no if it’s too soon -“
You leaned up to press your lips to his, not wanting to waste any more time than you already have. He kind of grunted in surprise, relaxing into your touch when you ran your fingers through his hair at the back of his head. It was better than you could have ever imagined. His lips were so soft and he was so gentle with how he held you that your knees could’ve buckled. He pulled away reluctantly after a few seconds, planting a kiss on your forehead.
“I didn’t wanna ruin anything,” he explained, tucking your hair behind your ear, “you know, just being with you. I would’ve swallowed it all down to be just your friend if it meant I wouldn't lose you.”
You brought both of your hands to cup his face, scratching lightly at his mutton chops, “Really?”
He nodded, kissing your forehead, your cheek and your lips again. It was sickeningly sweet, making you giggle into the kiss.
“What’s so funny?”
“Nothin’. Just really happy.”
“Me too, pretty girl. Hey, you owe me a couple of movie nights, by the way.”
“Race you to the TV?”
𖥔 ִ ་ ، ˖ ࣪ ་ ˖ ʿ𖥔 ִ ་ ، ˖ ࣪ ་ ˖ ʿ𖥔 ִ ་ ، ˖ ࣪ ་ ˖ ʿ𖥔 ִ ་ ، ˖ ࣪ ་ ˖ ʿ𖥔 ִ ་ ، ˖ ࣪ ་ ˖ ʿ𖥔 ִ ་ ، ˖ ࣪ ་
A/N: ik this ones pretty short but it was rotting in my google docs so here u go <3 pls like and reblog if you enjoyed!
#logan howlett#logan howlett fic#logan howlett x reader#logan howlett fanfiction#wolverine x reader#wolverine fic#wolverine#wolverine fanfiction#logan howlett smut#wolverine smut
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❝FIDELITY❞ |part1



MASTERLIST -`✮´- Rafe Cameron x Kook!Reader x JJ Maybank
Summary: Kook!Reader’s world is upended by betrayal, and her only way forward might lie with the most unlikely person—JJ Maybank. But as they build a new life together, old flames and past mistakes refuse to stay buried.
Warnings: blood, mentioning pregnancy
next
English isn’t my first language, so I apologize if I make some mistakes. 💗
You're lying on your back, the faint light streaming through Rafe’s blinds casting long shadows across the room. The space feels familiar, as always, but now, there’s something different, something unsettling—wrinkled sheets, the sharp, expensive scent of his cologne lingering in the air, his jacket casually draped over the chair by the window… There’s an intense silence, broken only by the low hum of the ceiling fan. It’s hard to ignore the unease gnawing at your mind, that strange sense that something’s just… off.
You shift slightly, watching his silhouette move in the soft morning light filtering through the curtains; he barely spoke since he got home last night, pulling you into bed, his thoughts miles away.
“Where are you going?” he murmur, breaking the silence. He’s already looking at you, eyes half-open, following your movements with a lazy grin and the faint imprint of the pillow still visible on his cheek.
“Told you I have things to do today, babe,” you say with a smile, and he frowns, stretching as he turns onto his back to look around.
“Come back to bed,” he says, reaching out to touch the spot where you’d just been lying. The usual cold demeanor he wears has softened; now, he’s almost sulking, like a kid pouting. “What, feeling chilly?” you tease with a smirk, picking up your jeans from the floor. Rafe sits up, watching you, visibly unimpressed by your joke.
“I’d rather see you taking those off.” His eyes trace over you, his tongue sweeping over his lips like he’s ready to devour you for breakfast. “Too bad,” you reply with a playful edge, alluding to how he’d come straight home last night and just crashed. He doesn’t break his gaze as he slumps back down, watching you intently from the bed.
“Babe, you’re serious right now? Come on, get back here.” You roll your eyes and keep dressing while he lets out a frustrated sigh, realizing he’s not going to win this time.
Without saying anything more, he resigns himself to watching, clearly enjoying the show you’re unknowingly giving him. “You should wear those jeans more often—they do wonders for your ass.” His comment makes you laugh, and his grin grows wider, obviously pleased.
Once you’re fully dressed, you grab your bag from across the room and approach the bed. Leaning over, he meets you halfway, his mouth pressing onto yours as if that’s exactly where he belongs. A perfect, effortless fit.
“Stay,” he says as you pull back a bit, looking down into his eyes. His smile holds that look—he could make anyone do anything, but he’s using it on you because he already knows he can.
“I can’t.” The words leave your lips just before he kisses you again, pulling you back down onto him. You can’t help but giggle as he quickly moves, wrapping you into his arms. When his eyes and his words don’t work, he’ll use his mouth. Still grinning, he keeps his lips pressed to yours.
After your laughter dies down, his hands slide through your hair, and he kisses you deeply, savoring the moment until he’s satisfied. He releases you with a few final pecks, hands still resting by your face, studying you closely. “I wonder what’s so important you’d leave me,” he muses.
You place your hand on his cheek, giving him one last soft kiss. He doesn’t resist—he matches your calm, unhurried pace. When you pull back, you feel that little hint of tension at his question, but you fight the urge to look away.
“My mom.” You say it, biting down on the first lie you can think of, hoping it’s convincing. “She wants me at home for breakfast. No idea why, but apparently, it’s important.” Rafe has that faint smile again. He tuned out after the first sentence, just watching you, captivated. Sometimes he barely listens to what you say, preferring just to watch you. He knows you’ll do whatever you want anyway, so why waste time?
He leans in, planting a quick kiss on your lips. “Call me later,” he says, settling back down into the bed with that look still in his eyes. You nod and head to the door. As you leave, you hear him say, “Love you.”
You turn back to him. “Love you more!” You pull the door shut, and his laugh filters through. It makes you smile, but as you descend the stairs, that smile fades until it’s completely gone when you leave Tannyhill.
There’s an ache inside you that doesn’t go away. Every day, it presses tighter against your chest. You wish you could just chalk it up to being sick, but you need proof, something undeniable. When the familiar nausea hits again, you clutch your stomach, breathing deeply. Your eyes well up with panic, knowing you’re already too far gone to hold it in.
-
The smells are stronger than usual. You already hate hospitals, that medicinal scent, but today it’s overwhelming, suffocating even. You wipe your nose and try not to cry.
You scan the aisles.
Looking for a familiar face, a potential danger.
Hoping to find a way out, some kind of excuse. You pretend to browse a shelf, but you’re really just eyeing the store for anyone who might recognize you.
Finally convinced it’s safe, your trembling hand reaches for the pregnancy test on the shelf. You grab it and wrap your hand around it quickly. Embarrassment and dread roll over you.
Not remembering that night, that’s what gnaws at you. You and Rafe, sometimes you’d skip protection, just for the thrill of it. But you always had some backup. You can’t recall the details. Was it a drunk night? Did it happen in Topper’s bathroom, on the yacht? You can’t remember. Did you use anything? Did you take a pill? It’s all blank.
You place the pregnancy test on the counter and exhale, but the smell of disinfectant overwhelms you, making you pinch your nose. The cashier, a brown-haired guy, rings up your purchase, but just as he’s about to hand over the receipt, a voice from the back calls him. “Be right back,” he says with a polite smile, disappearing into the storeroom.
Then you sense someone beside you, and as you turn, your eyes lock onto him. Your hand instinctively pulls the test closer. Out of all people—of course, it’s him—JJ Maybank.
For once, he’s not covered in bruises; he’s downright bloody. His eyebrow and lip are split, blood streaking down his face, dried patches marking where he’d wiped his nose. And he’s got that stupid grin on his face as usual.
“You good?” JJ asks. His voice is casual, without a hint of concern. He doesn’t really care if you’re okay—he’s just curious.
Idiot.
“You,” the word slips out. You’re trying to hold yourself together, wiping away the tears and forcing yourself to sound casual. He looks at you like he hasn’t been punched in the face. Not just his face—his shirt’s got blood on it too. “A better question is, are you good?”
JJ laughs, pointing at himself as if the question is absurd. “Me? You should see the other guy.” His smug voice grates at you, and you roll your eyes. JJ laughs again, clearly amused by your reaction. You turn away, but he speaks up.
“Think you might have Covid?”
Your eyes dart back to him, trying to figure out if he’s joking or just delirious from the punches. Maybe he’s taken one too many hits to the head.
“What the hell are you talking about?” you snap. He’s an idiot, so you have to talk to him like one. You’re just one step away from snapping entirely, feeling the irritation practically radiate off you.
“The thing in your hand,” he starts, clearly unbothered by your tone, grinning away. But you’re tense, the tightness settling in your chest like a butterfly stuck there.
“Oh, thought it was a Covid test. Unless… it’s a pregnancy test.” His eyes drop to the test you’re trying to hide, glinting with mischief, then lifting to yours. He lifts his shirt, wiping the blood from his face with the hem, which somehow annoys you even more.
You look away, feeling your heart pound with anxiety. It’s dumb to think he won’t notice, but you’re too tense to think straight. You’ve always made the wrong choices, you know that.
“You’re babbling nonsense,” you retort, still unable to meet his gaze, hoping to shake him off. But JJ doesn’t look away; his gaze stays on your hands, that stupid smirk still plastered across his face.
“My bad, sorry,” he said, waiting like someone who had just walked in from the outside. Even though he claimed he was apologizing, his words were laced with sarcasm, and you could tell he was still grinning.
You’d handed him ammunition. To him. And of course, if you were actually pregnant, the first to know wouldn’t be Rafe. It’d be him. That idiot. JJ Maybank.
You lunged forward and snatched the receipt from behind the register with trembling hands, too anxious to wait for the brown-haired cashier to come back and worried you’d betray your unease if you stayed any longer.
When you turned to leave, another wave of anxiety hit. There was a very real chance that he’d spread this around, tell his stupid friends, the Pogues… JJ was the last person you’d trust with something like this, but he was also the last person you’d want to have blab about it, with that big, unstoppable mouth of his. You turned around and walked back over.
He was already watching you, his eyes following your every move. Without hesitating, you spoke. “If I hear even a single word about this from anyone, I swear to god—”
But JJ only grinned wider, clearly entertained. “Whoa, whoa,” he raised his hands in mock surrender. “Your secret’s safe with me, princess.” He leaned against the counter, wiping the dried blood from his cheek, still watching you with that infuriating smirk. “I promise not to tell the world you ‘might be Covid positive.’”
His mocking tone left you speechless, made you tense. He knew exactly what was in your hand—even if you told him to drop it, he wouldn’t. Of course not. You shot him one last look, spun on your heels, and made a break for the door.
As you left, you could still feel his eyes on you, that annoying smirk echoing in your mind. The idea that he might actually say something made your chest tighten. He wouldn’t need to yell it from the rooftops; even if one of those idiot friends of his overheard, you’d be done. For someone who usually faded into the background, JJ Maybank had a knack for making himself unforgettable.
He knew your biggest secret.
-
You prayed. At barely twenty years old, you prayed it wouldn’t be true. Begged yourself to just be fooling yourself. You even swore to never have sex again if that would help.
What would you do?
How would you tell Rafe, your family, that you had a baby growing inside you?
You fucked.
You fucked, and the double lines on that test proved it. Only you and God knew how deep into this mess you’d landed.
#rafe cameron smut#rafe cameron x you#rafe cameron fanfiction#rafe fic#rafe x reader#rafe obx#rafe cameron#jj serie#obx jj maybank#obx jj#jj maybank#jj fanfiction#obx4#obx#obx x reader#obx fanfiction#obx fic#outer banks netflix#outerbanks rafe#rafe outer banks#outer banks jj#outer banks#obx cast#rafe cameron series
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Im just gonna write this down because i just love the thought of it and imagine just..Logan and the reader being obsessed with each other.
I've seen a lot of fics where they talk about Logans jealousy and posessiveness but what if the reader was also jealous and a little bit posessive?
Like her gripping his bicep a little too tight when they're in a bar and a girl is eyeing him a little bit too much, Her giving him her hair tie to wear as a bracelet?
And maybe Logans is intrigued and entertained by this, he thinks its cute.
Sorry if this is too long or if it makes you uncomfortable lol, you dont have to answer this if thats the case! Love u and your fics
Siren
Trilogy Logan X F! Reader
A woman tries to make a move on your man

A/N: Nonny, you're soooo right. Reader and Logan being equally obsessed with each other is the BEST. Also I love you too <3, lets elope.
Warnings: Semi-Plot, jealous reader, maybe a tad too jealous, reader has a ponytail...Logan being cute
"Refill?"
You smiled at him, shaking your head. "We're not supposed to be drinking baby."
"C'mon, this is the first time we've been out together in something resembling a date in weeks." He scoffs.
"Yeah because we have a job to do?" You shook your head amused. He sighed, grabbing your glass.
"Doesn't mean I'm not going to savor spending what time I get with you." He mutters. He stood up from the bench seat you both were sitting and looked at you once more, you tilted your head, a smile stretched across your lips as you admire his grumpy expression. He let out a flared sigh, before leaning down to give you a kiss. You happily reached up in your seat to kiss him back, your hand reaching to grab the collar of his jacket, almost possessively before his lips parted from yours. "Be right back."
He straightened up, turning to walk through the crowded bar -weaving between dancing groups of friends and couples making out until he reached counter with both your glasses in hand, setting the glasses down and knocking against the wood counter with his knuckles, before raising his hand, snapping his fingers to get the bartenders attention.
You braced your elbows onto the round table and rest your chin atop your clasped hands watching him with admiration. The surface was sticky from countless spills of food and alcohol alike, never cleaned. The bar was just another typical hole-in-the-wall bar, not your first choice in places to go with Logan- as if you had a choice at all.
Charles (reluctantly) sent you both on a mission to track down a mutant with supposed telepathic abilities. He's picked up on a powerful string of telepathic energy traveling through multiple states alongside a string of victims of robberies- all men who had a lot of money. According to the police reports the team was able to get a hold of, multiple men reported a beautiful woman as the likely suspect, as well as a strange feeling of being controlled. One refused to give any details, claiming he loved her even if she broke his heart.
Definitely a telepath.
He felt sending Jean or Emma, would create tension between very strong telepaths- seeing how Emma and Jean are with each other already. Ororo and Scott were sent to track a different lead.
Logan had a strong mind, able to break through even the most intense brainwashing. You, reasonable, empathetic, the good cop. Charles felt the two of you would make a good team in apprehending this mutant, and convincing them to come to the school. Logan had to remark that of course you're a good team- then made a dirty joke about it that Charles scolded him for it.
You'd been trailing the path of the mutant for weeks now. Logan was becoming more and more impatient with the intense focus on all work and no play- you took your job seriously, well, as seriously as you could when he was around.
Scott called this morning and informed of new info that came up- that said mutant could possibly pop up in this bar. Something about a dream or feeling or whatever Charles had- Logan tend to tune Scott's voice out so you didn't have the whole story. Logan called bullshit, but you convinced him otherwise.
Now you're here, trying to find this mutant and Logan had been kissing you all over as you both sat in a booth hidden in the corner. You did your best to ignore him, letting him have his fun while you searched for any signs of this mutant. You're sure that if you looked in a mirror or any reflection of yours, you'd observe hickeys all along your neck and shoulder.
and that, is why Charles was reluctant to send you both on this mission.
You phone vibrated, and you looked away from Logan for two seconds to check on it and when you looked up you were greeted with the sight of her.
Beautiful woman, stunning actually. Long blonde hair that fell over her shoulders in waves. She was across the room but you could see her piercing blue eyes- and her lustful smile as she began to chat up your man.
Oh fuck no.
You sat back in your seat, crossing your arms as you tried to settle the bubbling jealously inside you. You tried to reason with it, shove it down
She's innocent, she's innocent, she just doesn't know, Logan is incredibly handsome of course anyone is going to try-
Your face dropped when you saw her put her hand on his bicep- a gentle squeeze, and you're out of your seat.
You weren't subtle when you pushed yourself between them.
"Hey baby-" You greeted, tilting your head at him, a passive smile on your face. Logan quirked a brow, the corner of his lip twitching into a smile. "You get those refills yet?"
"Just waiting." He hums, then nodded, motioning to the person to your side. "This is Alexis."
You turn to the woman, flashing her a small smile. She smiles back.
"This your girlfriend?" Alexis asks, then looked past you at Logan. "She's so pretty."
I'm literally right here.
Your smile faltered, and grew bigger. "Thank you." You say, then turned back to Logan, flipping your ponytail as you turned your head. "Drinks?"
"Bartender is soooo busy-" Alexis answers for him, and Logan noticed the twitch of your eye. "I'm sure he'll be right back with your...coke and whiskey."
"Mm." You nodded, not looking at her again and hooking your arm around his. You looked at him, and he was looking at you with a small smirk on his face. You knew why he was smirking and you really wanted to wipe the arrogance off him.
You weren't ashamed to admit you were a little possessive of Logan. How could you not be? He was a fine ass man. You're adored him, every part of him- good and bad. You've been through a lot together, and while you were certainly secure with him- when someone else checks him out or makes a move on him it sets off some sort of bitch instinct to bear your teeth and claim your territory.
Who could blame you when it came to protecting what's yours?
and he is most definitely, yours. As if the hickeys that had been left by him on your neck hadn't made it more obvious. You even adjusted yourself, making them prominent so this lady would get the message. You mark him up the same, except for that healing factor to hide it.
Logan however didn't seem phased when you shot him a look. He unwrapped his arm around you, and pulled you close by your hip. His hand squeezed you reassuringly.
"So...Alexis...Where ya from?"
You were glad your face was turned away from her, because your expression contorted into absolute fury. Logan smiled up at you.
"Oh...I travel around." She smiles. "Came up from New Orleans, passed by a few towns. I guess I just like seeing things...Meeting people."
Your jaw clenched, and Logan's hand gave you a reassuring squeeze. He didn't take his eyes off you.
"You ever happened to visit Richmond, Virginia?"
Your ears perked at Logan's words.
"Why yes actually. Just came from there. Cute city- But I...Think I like it here better." She replies, something sensual in her voice and you just knew that she was giving Logan bedroom eyes over your shoulder.
Now though you couldn't care. Logan just told you what he was thinking- You're not sure what gave him the idea that Alexis is the mutant you've been tracking for weeks. Logan always had a good intuition, and you trusted him.
It was an ordeal- a little fighting, a little convincing- and some more fighting.
Logan revealed he knew it was her because he could feel her rummaging around his brain the same way Charles and Jean have- likely trying to do what she did to her other victims.
Alexis agreed to come to the school to speak with Charles. After a very heartfelt talk between you both, that involved you making clear that she doesn't try to make moves on Logan again- nicely, of course.
The car pulled up to the front of the school, before stopping with a small squeal of the breaks.
Doors open, and you, Logan, and Alexis stepped out, looking road weary, more you and Logan. Alexis however, shared excitement with you.
"This place looks great." She turns and smiles at you. "So you're headmaster...Is he rich?"
You raised a brow. "Sweetheart, don't even try." You shook your head. She suppressed a laugh and nodded,
"Right. Force of habit."
"What? You got hands lady." He scoffs walking around her. "Don't be expecting people to do shit for you 'round here or you're gonna be making more enemies here than you did on the road."
Logan was at the trunk, grabbing your bag and his. Alexis came around, and waited looking at him expectantly. Her bag sat in the trunk alone. He raised a brow,
You joined his side as you walked up the path to the front door, "That was a little rude Lo...." You smiled.
"She needs the wake up call. Besides, when she meets Jean and Emma it's going to be a whole lot worse."
"Maybe but we spent all that time finding her and getting her to come with us...Don't want to scare her off so quickly..."
"Says you." He says. "Practically threatened her if she so much as breathed in my direction-"
"Nu uh!" You laughed shoving him. "I didn't threaten her. It was an...understanding."
"Sure" He mocked, but the look in his eyes told you he loved it.
You walked through the mansion together, greeting the various students who were happy to see you- and dropping Alexis off at Xavier's office.
When you finally reached your shared bedroom, and the door shut behind it. You grabbed Logan, pulling him close as your lips crashed against his.
"Hey-!" He lets out in surprise, and then chuckles. His arms wrapped around you, pulling you against him. He let you work the kiss, your lips moving over his desperately, possessively- and you nipped his bottom lip, tugging at it before letting go. He opened his eyes, looking into yours with fondness.
You didn't even have to say what that kiss was for,
"I know." He says. "I'm all yours baby."
You smiled. "Going to have to make sure others know that now...." You pondered, before an idea struck you. You reached up into your hair, grabbing the scrunchie that held your ponytail together and let your hair fall down your shoulders. You grabbed his hand, sliding the scrunchie over until it sat firmly on his wrist. "There." You snapped it onto his skin- and he never looked more in love with you. "For now, till we found something better."
He glanced down- the scrunchie, a bright pink color. Didn't look bad at all. "Mm." He makes a sound of approval and then looks at you. His hand- the one adorning your claim on him - reached out to cup your cheek before tilting your head to look at your neck. "Looks like they're fading. Gotta put some new ones on ya. Can't be having anyone thinking you're not taken either darling."
#logan howlett#wolverine#logan howlett x reader#logan howlett x you#wolverine x reader#logan howlett fanfiction#vans daydreams#logan howlett fic#wolverine fic
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Steve H.
Part Two, Part One
Okay, I started the last post with a "Haha wouldn't it be funny" which turned into a long, not-so-funny rant. So! Here is the funny part!
Steve is Dustin's brother and Claudia's son in all but law. He lives with them, calls Claudia mom and refers to Dustin as his brother, takes them to all his school events until he graduates and helps pay the bills after high school. Claudia never pressures him to apply to colleges he doesn't even want to get into or makes him feel like he has to move out any time soon when he turns 18, so he stays and gets a part-time job at Scoops where he bonds with Robin for life.
At the same time, drop out Eddie and his uncle Wayne move to town when the power company transfers him to the plant in Hawkins. It serves them well since Eddie needs a fresh start after getting tossed out of school without a degree for unjust reasons. He needs some place where he can make friends and get a job without his reputation hanging over his head, and Wayne would never abandon his nephew.
So they land in Hawkins and Eddie finds his feet by visiting the library and happening upon a gaggle of kids commandeering one of the reservable conference rooms for DnD. They're are a few older kids closer to his age there too, but the curly-haired one is definitely running the show.
Meanwhile, Wayne has failed to mention to his nephew that the main reason he agreed to the transfer uncontested was because he hit it off with one Claudia Henderson at a diner after a fishing trip and has been dating her without Eddie's knowledge for 8 months. He breaks the news to his Nephew when he starts making plans to propose and wants to introduce Eddie to Claudia and her sons before he does. Wayne loves Claudia but Eddie comes first and he wants to make sure they'll all make a good family.
So they go over to the Henderson household for dinner one night, Wayne having wrangled Eddie into a black button-down and jeans without holes so Claudia doesn't think he raised a ruffian.
Dustin answers the door and immediately freaks out because he's so excited. He's met Wayne before and so has Steve so he knows things are serious and there's a good chance Eddie becomes family down the line.
Yelling in excitement the whole way Dustin drags both men into the kitchen where the root of all Eddie's troubles can be found.
Steve.
He immediately starts bitching at Dustin about acceptable volumes, towel over his shoulder and hands on hips and Eddie is Gone. Sent. In the stratosphere and immediately smitten. He's lost in the clouds planning their own wedding until reality crashes back down on his head as Steve extends his hand and introduces himself as Dustin's brother.
Eddie, of course, does not know that Steve is not actually related to anyone in this family legally or otherwise and no one thinks to clue him in since they're all so accustomed to the family dynamic.
If Google had been around in the 80s Eddie's search history would be full of "Is it illegal to date my uncle's step-son? NOT RELATED BY BLOOD" "how many degrees of separation in the family tree is acceptable?"
Que Eddie desperately trying to suppress his crush and not ruin his uncle's happiness by wooing his almost step-cousin ew like he really wants to.
But it's so hard! Steve is so beautiful and kind and dorky and a little weird and basically everything Eddie could possibly want in a boyfriend! Eddie wants to bite his freckles and hold his hand so badly but he won't ruin Wayne's future marriage because he kissed his future stepson like they're characters in those soap operas Claudia likes. He won't!
And then to make matters worse Steve seems like he really wants to bond with Eddie. He's always asking him to hang out wether that's going to the mall to hang out with his best friend Robin or swapping tapes at Claudia's house or showing Eddie all his favorite spots in Hawkins. (Steve is very much dropping hints that he wants to date Eddie who he's 96% sure is into him but Eddie is too caught up to notice)
It comes to a head on the day of the engagement. Wayne enlisted all three of "his boys" to help set up a nice dinner party with their closest friends, something Claudia has always mentioned wanting to host, while Joyce invites her out for some shopping and girl time. Steve and Wayne do most of the cooking while Eddie and Dustin are on set up picking up the flowers and pulling the nice table setting down from the attic before separating to get dressed in their nice outfits.
It's like a moment from a fairytale when Steve walks down the stairs and smiles at him. He's so fucking handsome it makes Eddie's heart ache with the cold realization that he's fallen completely in love with a man he can't have. Eddie can feel a prickling behind his eyes but he brutally shoves the sensation down. Today isn't about him.
Eddie puts on a happy face. It's not hard, he is truly happy for Wayne. His uncle deserves the world and both him and Claudia looked so in love when she said yes. He just wishes it didn't have to mean never having the man of his dreams. Eddie sticks the party out and he thinks he did a pretty good job hiding his mood right up until Dustin barges into the basement where the hideaway bed lives. The plan was always for the whole new family unit to stay the night so Eddie heads down as soon as it is acceptable to fall face-first into the pillows and trash around a little bit. Maybe even scream. Sue him, he's heartbroken.
That's how Dustin finds him and he immediately starts crowing that he knew something was up with Eddie. He starts pestering in true Dustin fashion until Eddie inelegently blurts out "I'M IN LOVE WITH MY FUTURE COUSIN IN LAW!"
Dustin blinks at him for a few minutes while Eddie freaks out because he's been so good only for Dustin to bully a confession out of him the day his uncle got engaged like a jerk!
But then Dustin is literally rolling around on the floor howling with laughter and Eddie has never wanted to strangle someone and disappear at the same time in his whole life. He's about to start asking Dustin what the fuck is up when the younger boy sits up and says "He's not my real brother!" at which point it's Eddie's turn to blink at Dustin in silence.
Dustin explains that while Steve is definitely his brother in all the ways that matter he's not actually related to Dustin or Claudia, nor was he ever legally adopted.
Eddie hardly lets Dustin finish his story before he's booking it up the stairs to Steve's room with a truly unprecedented display of athleticism on his part. He franticly taps on the door, aware enough to avoid banding on it like he would like to lest he disturb the newly engaged couple down the hall.
Steve opens the door, eyes wide and slightly frantic. As soon as his eyes meet Eddie's they disappear from his eyeline because Eddie has dropped to his knees, hands clasped together, and begs "Mary me!"
Of course, they don't get engaged that night. Eddie kind of just panicked and said the first thing that came to his head, but they kissed and began to date with the full blessing of their weird little family.
#steddie#dreamer speaks#wayne munson#eddie munson#steve harrington#dustin henderson#fanfiction#claudia henderson#stranger things
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steve's desperate, okay?
he's officially running late for his first date with linda because he couldn't find his car keys and the shirt he wanted to wear just wasn't working so he had to grab something out of his hamper and throw it on blindly which then messed up his hair and he almost forgot to brush his teeth again but remembered as he opened the front door and-
he only realizes he forgot to put on cologne once he makes it halfway to her house and smells himself. the shirt from the hamper smells stale, not bad, just stale. and steve in his normal, non-rushed state wouldn't have noticed because his trusty calvin klein would have covered it up but today is apparently not a day for things to go right.
with a sigh of frustration, steve pulls into the hook's drugstore a little too quickly and it makes his stomach lurch the tiniest bit before sliding into an open parking sport at the front door. he rushes in, pushing the door open with too much force and books it to the fragrance aisle.
"this is so fucking stupid," he mutters to himself, unable to be heard by any surrounding shoppers over the annoyingly loud jingle playing through the speakers.
steve skids to halt in front of the cologne section, crouching down and scanning quickly over the tester bottles for obsession. once he spots the amber bottle, he yanks it towards himself, spraying as much as he can onto his chest given the awkward angle he's at. as he stands back up, steve pulls his shirt collar up towards his nose and the ball of nerves in his stomach loosens at the familiar smell. he may be late but he feels like he's back in the game.
checking his watch, he sees just how late he is and makes a beeline for the door, nearly running into an older lady with far too many rolls of toilet paper in her tiny arms. as he dodges around her and extends his arm to push open the door, he hears a loud voice over the intercom.
"you're not going to buy anything after stealing cologne?"
steve stops, freezes where he is and frantically turns his head around to spot the cashier grinning at him. he has long hair and a bright red hook's drugstore vest over a denim vest which doesn't look very comfortable. he has chains in his jeans and handcuffs holding his belt closed and a smirk that is trying to kill him and oh-
"wait, stealing cologne?" steve shakes himself back into existence as the old lady pushes by him without dropping a single roll on the way back to her car. "you're going to call me putting on a few sprays stealing?"
the cashier's smile just gets bigger, like a cat hunting down a canary. steve's never felt like a canary before but can't deny that it's an exciting feeling.
"well, on a good day i wouldn't. but i'm bored and you didn't buy a single thing so technically, yes. you're stealing, pretty boy."
steve fights the urge to roll his eyes and put his hands on his hips, so instead he crosses them over his chest, cologne wafting up from the movement and reminding him that he doesn't have time for this no matter how cute the cashier may be.
he makes his way over to the counter, grabs a pack of gum and slams it on the counter. without breaking eye contact with eddie, as his nametag suggests, he throws him a salty smile of his own and pulls his wallet out from his back pocket.
eddie's eyes are a deep brown with a glimmer of something behind them and his hands are covered in rings making his fingers look long and strong. the jeans he has on are ripped on one of the the thighs, showing a hint of a tattoo to match the ones crawling up his arms. steve's no stranger to thinking men are attractive but this guy? he's on a new level. his heart thumps painfully in his chest when eddie's grin grows larger as he watches steve give him a once over. it thumps even harder when eddie gives him a once over of his own.
the clock above the register shows that he's officially 20 minutes late to picking up... laura? lisa?
no, linda. damnit.
eddie looks down at the gum and then back up at steve, quirking up an eyebrow. "i hardly think this monetarily equates to a bottle of cologne but-"
"oh come on!" steve huffs. eddie laughs and it's clear and bright, ringing off the cinderblock walls louder than the annoying jingle that's still playing. whatever fight steve may have had left in him drains away at the sound and suddenly he isn't thinking about the clock anymore. he feels his shoulders fall down to a more relaxed state, feels himself shift his weight on his feet to look more natural than ready to run at a moments notice.
"just kidding, man." eddie rings up the gum quickly and hands it back to steve. "sorry, you looked like you were in a rush. i shouldn't have created a scene just because i'm bored."
steve chuckles. "i'm already supremely late for my date so what's another five minutes. especially if it gets me..." he looks at the gum packet to look at what he even picked up in the first place. "... spearmint freshen-up gum."
"well there you go," eddie says, grin smaller than before, "a perfect thing to get for a date. everyone likes their date to be minty fresh for that first kiss."
it strikes somewhere in steve that he isn't expecting. the beemer is still out in the parking lot running so he didn't have to waste time, his watch on his wrist feels heavy, the scent of obsession overpowering. but he can't make himself move. he wants to stay and talk to eddie, wants to learn about what makes him tick.
"can i borrow your phone?" steve asks. eddie's eyebrows furrow but he reaches for the store phone and places the console on top of the counter.
"for what?"
steve look through his wallet, finding the piece of paper with linda's number on it. holding the receiver between his shoulder and ear, he dials in her number and holds his pointer finger up at eddie, signaling that he'll need a second. steve then brings the finger to his lips and shushes with his cheek pulling up in a smirk. eddie's eyes zero in on the motion and it feels like steve's gone from being the canary back to the cat.
"linda? hey it's steve."
he watches as eddie mouths steve back at him and then nods to himself when he gets the confirmation that it is indeed his name. steve throws him a wink for good measure.
"i know i'm late and i'm really really sorry to cancel last minute but-. oh. yeah, sure. have a good time. okay bye li-."
on the other end of the line, linda slams down the phone without waiting for steve to finish talking and it makes him wince with how loud it is in his ear. he gives eddie a sheepish smile, all toothy and guilt-ridden, and gently puts the receiver back down.
"what was that?" eddie asks with a disbelieving look on his face. steve shrugs.
"she got tired of waiting so she already had another guy lined up to come pick her up."
eddie sucks in air through his teeth and mimes getting shot in the heart. it has steve laughing as he falls over on the counter, hair covering his face. he turns his head to peer up at steve through the curtain of curls, the one brown eye that's visible twinkling in the harsh overhead light.
"was it true love? are you just absolutely heartbroken?"
steve thinks about it for less than a second. watches how eddie curls back up one vertebrae at a time before placing his elbows on the counter and leaning over. watches how eddie's eyes flit between his own and his lips. watches how he focuses on the latter for a little while too long.
"why would i be heartbroken," steve starts. he's being too forward, too brash, but with eddie looking at him that way, he knows he can be. "when you'll probably be on break soon and can make it up to me? you know, for making me even more late and all."
eddie's grin grows wide again. "oh really?"
steve shrugs once more with a playful look of consideration on his face, resting on his elbows to match eddie on the counter. "yes, really. this is your payback for being bored and taking it out on me."
it's later when eddie's on break and steve hasn't left the drugstore in over an hour and they're sitting in his car with bowie playing through the speakers that eddie looks up at him with a look steve knows well.
"you do smell really good, y'know." his voice is softer than steve's heard it all day.
"so are you glad i came in to steal cologne?" steve leans closer over the center console to get into eddie's personal space. there's a hand curling over his bicep and pulling him even closer, their faces only centimeters apart.
"i guess i'll let it slide this time, thief."
and when they kiss for the first time, it tastes like the freshen-up gum they both had been nonstop chewing ever since steve paid for it.
#did drugstores back then have fragrance aisles let alone samplers? who's to say just go with it#inspired by me looking cute for work today and forgetting to put on my perfume and wondering if i should stop in to target on my way in#steddie#steddie drabble#steddie ficlet#steddie headcanon#steve harrington#eddie munson#my writing#steddie fic#is this realistic? absolutely not but ignore that for the blorbos sake#stranger things#stranger things fic
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YOU’RE WHINING
carl grimes x reader
(carls whining gets irritating.)
tags: oral sex (m!receiving), needy carl :P
masterlist here!
Carl was never really one to pry for things. He really did love taking care of you whenever he had the chance, he enjoyed the traditional ways of handling your relationship. He would love to hold doors open for you, let you enter places first (unless dangerous), cooking for you, or even when it came to your intimate relationship.
Most of the time, he did what he could to pleasure you. Whatever position allowed you to feel best, he did it for you. He also made sure you finished first every time. Not to mention he loves going down on you, not just because it pleasured you but he just absolutely adores it. Anyway, the first time you’d done something for him, he realized how nice it was to be to one receiving the head.
You didn’t realize how needy he could get before then. That man is vocal. The first time he let you give him head was when you guys were insanely bored while no one was home.
It’s a good thing no one was home as he practically couldn’t keep his mouth shut.
Anyway since then he’s been begging for it again. Unfortunately there was never really a right time. You were always on runs and even then you were always having some sort of trouble whether it was walkers, issues with the car, even people. It all got worse when you were assigned on different jobs for a week. Aaron had found a new horse and you were put the task of breaking it. Meanwhile, Carl had perimeter watch.
After a long and frustrating day with the new horse, you pull her into a newly built stable to brush her down n such. Despite your struggles in breaking her, she was beautiful, you had to admit. You were just about done before you heard footsteps approaching, so you turn around to be greeted by the sight of Carl. He said he’d come meet you after his shift.
“Hey.” You smile and he almost swoons completely. He greets you back with a small hello and a kiss on the cheek before giving his attention to the horse in front of you. He stroked her for a moment before looking back at you, admiring how you looked. He wanted you to suck him off so bad, he was practically yearning for it. He felt this feeling in his throat, almost like a moan, but not. You look back over to him and look at him sort of oddly, wondering what the expression on his face was about.
“You okay?” You ask, sort of setting him off. Then he lets out a noise, one that sort of baffles you before he started rambling. “Please, I really need it can you-” His breath is heavy and he pulls his hat off to cover his crotch where you can assume there’s a tent in his jeans. Your eyes widen and you’re not quite sure how to respond. “Jesus, Carl you’re whining.” You state, completely taken aback by his demeanor.
“I know m’really sorry but I…I really need you to go down on me I’m begging here.” He takes a step closer to you and takes your hand in his, holding it real tight because he is, in fact, begging. “Just behind the stable, no one will see.” He pleads.
Well…how can you say no to that?
Soon after, you’re kneeling down in front of him in the grass between the large steel wall (of Alexandria) and the wood of the stables. He was right, no one would see you there but they could definitely hear you so you warn him. “You’re gonna need to be quiet.” You start to work on getting his belt off and he nods, his breath getting heavier the longer he sees you on your knees in front of him.
As you work on his belt, you decide to tease him a little because, why not? So you press kisses to his (very hard by the way) dick through his jeans, causing him to moan already. You haven’t even gotten to the real thing. “I told you baby you gotta be quiet.” You smile up at him and he looks down at you so frustrated. Frustrated because you’re teasing him and you know how long he’s been wanting this. Except, that only makes it hotter for him.
You finally get his belt unbuckled and you unbutton his jeans. You tug them down, along with his underwear, just to see how needy he really was. He was rock hard, he couldn’t help it with the way you looked when he walked into the stable, your hair a mess, tired eyes and sweaty. It got him really, really aroused. You take a hold of his length which draws a sharp hiss from his mouth.
Just looking up at him like the way you were prompted him to leak a little which you very clearly took notice considering you took that as a go ahead to take him in your mouth. “Oh god-” His arms were practically nailed to the wood behind him and you continued to take him, sliding his cock in and out of your mouth repeatedly, your saliva building up and following each movement of your mouth. Your other hand goes to the base of his cock and it sort of lingers there, your fingers gently massaging. It was taking everything in him to not rut his hips into your mouth.
“I can’t..” His hands now go to your hair where he gently tries to steady himself but he seriously can’t take it. The wet noises coming from your mouth as you still won’t stop. “Please baby I’m close.” He moans, prompting you to pull back a moment, pulling a whine from him as well. You still slowly twist your hand around his dick while you look up at him, admiring him and how gorgeous he looks. His bottom lip is red from biting it so hard trying to keep quiet, but his mouth is agape and he’s breathing so hard. Meanwhile his eyes are half lidded and he just looks so fucked out.
“Is this what you wanted?” You giggle and swirl your tongue around his tip, prodding your tongue into the slit of it. All the air leaves his body and eyes roll into the back of his head. He moans so fucking loud, your eyes widen at his volume. “If you don’t close your mouth I will stop.” You laugh and he nods, taking in a deep breath to get ready for you to start again.
“Good?” He looks down and nods yes. “Yeah, good.” So you start again, moving your hand with your mouth too, spreading the saliva down to cover him with it completely. You go back to bobbing your head at a steady pace, feeling his cock twitch in your mouth. Carl resorted to just letting out soft groans, quiet enough for just the two of you to hear.
Soon enough, he was close again and this time you wouldn’t stop. You’d move quicker, taking more and more of him into your throat while he pushed your hair back out of your face. “M’gonna cum please don’t stop-” He speaks breathlessly and you comply, not stopping until he grips the back of your head still against him while the warm liquid spills down your throat. Once every drop is out of him, he lets go of your head and you pull away, doing everything you can to make it look somewhat attractive. A string of saliva follows your mouth from his dick.
You wipe your mouth with your sleeve and he gets himself back situated in his jeans. All he wants to do at this point is love on you. You treated him so well. He pulls you into a hug, leaning back against the stable wall while he kisses you all over your face.
“That good?”
“No that was incredible.”
a/n: so let’s talk about this LMFAOOOO LISTEN!!! i got this request and started writing it right after T-T and then finished it an hour after it was requested. where did that motivation come from? no idea. but also this made me realize i have never posted a fic where the reader gives him a blow job so…that might be why?
anyway this was very impromptu, match ups done soon blah blah ghost in the woods blah blah
tag list: @zomb-1-egutzz @lunarnightt @ilikestrawberriesandwomen @hiro--aoki @h00d-tr4sh @callsignwidow
#carl grimes#twd#the walking dead#carl grimes twd#carl grimes fanfiction#carl grimes x reader#carl grimes fluff#carl grimes x fem!reader#carl grimes x y/n#carl grimes the walking dead#the walking dead carl#carl grimes smut#twd carl#twd smut#twd fanfiction#rinas writing 🌀
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MET HER 0N THE iNTERNET | EREN JAGER.


PAIRING: EREN JAEGER X FEM! READER.
SYNOPSIS: Eren Jaeger met you on the internet & immediately fell in love with your looks, personality and body. He knew his crush on you was dumb and will not last long because come on — online relationships? Those don’t last that long. Until eren found a way to not make it online anymore!
C/W: losing the pwp war, noncon –> dubcon, online stalking, solo m! masturbation, lovesick! eren, possessive! eren, cheating, vaginal fingering, face/throat fucking, facial, brief after-care at the end.
WORD COUNT: 5.9K
NOTE: repost. i know y’all are so sick n’ tired of me but this is going to be the last time i promise 😓😓🤞

Eren was laying down on his bed, the moonlight illuminating and reflecting on his phone screen as he scrolled through people’s accounts/profiles on instagram. None who’ve piqued his interest, scrolling and scrolling until he came across your profile.
Clicking on your username, he was met with the highlights you have saved on your profile and the three posts you have posted. Eren clicked on the first post–it was a picture of you laying down on your bed, ass slightly up while you had your tongue in-between your teeths with a small smile.
Eren slightly gulped and continued going through your posts, his breath slightly hitching once he came across a picture of you with your thong peeking out from the low rise jeans you were wearing, shirt too tight your cleavage was all out.
Eren quickly zoomed out and went to check your highlights, clicking on the first one which was titled with “<3”, knowing exactly what it meant as soon as he saw a picture of you and another man holding hands. The next story being another picture of you and that man nose touching. As eren continued going through the highlights, the more furious he got even though he doesn’t even know you.
Eren clicked his tongue in annoyance before hitting the ‘follow’ button, maybe, fate might be on his side for once and you’d break up with your boyfriend soon.
The next day came rather quickly and throughout his whole day–eren was thinking about you. He was thinking about how gorgeous you looked, your smile so sweet, your hair styled in a unique way, everything about you was perfect. He couldn’t help but keep thinking about you, despite not knowing who you are.
12:40am.
Eren threw himself on the bed, letting out a sigh before unlocking his phone–clicking on the instagram app and checking his notifications, to find that you’ve followed him back. Eren smiled. Viewing your story to find that you’ve posted a new picture of yourself, it was a full body mirror picture. Your body slightly tilted to the side showing off your ass, you held up a peace sign over your face–you were wearing nike pro shorts with a plain white t-shirt.
Eren quickly liked your story, swiping up to reply–“lookin real’ good” and not even a minute has passed, he has already received a reply from you. “Thank youuu,” eren scoffed at the lack of energy and effort in your reply but then again, he gets it, you have a boyfriend. You shouldn’t be giving into other men’s compliments.
Eren decided to check your following, maybe even try and find your boyfriend’s username since you didn’t tag him in any of your posts.
You were following a couple of hashtags, some celebrities and then the rest were mostly your friends, family and classmates. Eren scrolled and scrolled until he came across a guys’ profile, he had your initial in his bio and a “i ❤️ my gf” pfp. His account was private and you were one of the few people following him. Eren decided that this was your boyfriend and to confirm his suspicions about it he went through your posts and checked the comment section.
A total of almost 200 comments were under each one of your posts and finally, after a few seconds of scrolling he found the same guy bombarding your comment section; “wife” “😍😍” “mine <3” eren rolled his eyes, slightly clenching his fists in annoyance.
He turned off his phone and placed it anywhere besides him. Eren was laying down on his bed, his hand resting on his forehead as he went deep into thought. Thinking of ways to get to know you better and maybe even make you fall in love with him just like how he fell in love with you at first sight.
Then an idea suddenly popped up. Eren quickly turned on his phone and texted one of his closest friends.

Eren’s fingers dragged towards the “ + to your story” button, scrolling through his camera roll and clicking on a picture of himself after the gym–shirtless and all sweaty from working out. He added any song that seemed to fit and posted the picture on his story. In a matter of a few seconds, eren got a bunch of notifications– “armin_arlert liked your story” “conniethegoat liked your story” “mikasa_ackerman liked your story” scrolling past the notifications and pausing once he got to a certain notification.
It was a notification from you, your username displayed on his screen with a ‘liked your story’ beside it. Eren felt his heart flutter, it was just a small little interaction from you but it still left eren flustered. He did find it a bit odd though, you had a boyfriend and no guy would like it if his girlfriend was liking other men’s stories. Especially not pictures of other men shirtless.
He didn’t give a fuck though. That just means he was one step closer to having you.
Eren took a screenshot of your notification, to stare at it every time he’s feeling a bit down–to remind himself that the girl he’s currently chasing noticed him and knows he exists.
Eren was already working on getting rid of your boyfriend. So he could finally get the chance to slide into your dms again but he needs to have your boyfriend out of the picture; It was simple really, all he had to do was contact one of his closest female friends to get the job done.
And who would he speak to other than mikasa. One of the prettiest girls he knows, his childhood best friend. Texting her & telling her to do him a small little favor; to text your boyfriend and “befriend” him. She obviously refused the request, why would she break up a perfectly healthy couple? And to have you, an innocent sweet girl, fall for eren’s schemes. But after eren’s constant nagging and him threatening her to drop her and waste years of a long healthy friendship made her agree.
“mikasa_ackerman requested to follow you.”
Your boyfriend didn’t accept mikasa’s request until she suddenly messaged him;
“You’re cute. Think you can settle for two?” your boyfriend was confused, how does this stranger know what he looks like when his account is private. He didn’t question it any further though–not when he went through mikasa’s profile. Pale-skinned girl with gray eyes, shaggy black hair that reached her chin and bangs that added more to her looks, her well-toned body that made her more attractive than she already was.
Immediately accepting the request and following her back.
“Thank you, not sure about the ‘settling for two’ thing though.”
Sure, your boyfriend might’ve done the wrong thing by messaging her back instead of just ignoring her dm but come on, men will be men and having a cute girl in his requests–patiently waiting for him to text back, did not make him greater than any man.
They texted for a while, mikasa occasionally sending pictures of herself wearing a sports bra while at the gym or sending full body pictures to your boyfriend to make him fold. All to which were eren’s requests and of course against mikasa’s will. Feeling an aching feeling in her gut every time she had to text another girl’s man made her feel horrible about herself. She was no better than a homewrecker.
Your boyfriend didn’t cross the line while talking to mikasa, yeah sure he was hiding it from you but he wasn’t flirting back. Sometimes, occasionally, on rare events, he’d compliment her. Saying she has a well-built body or sometimes saying she’s “kinda” good looking. But that was all before he found out she lived in the same city as him.
As soon as he found out, the way he was treating mikasa all changed. Becoming flirty with her, washing her with compliments. Doing all that behind the “i heart my gf” profile picture and behind your back as well.
And it wasn’t long before you found out. Eren texted you from an anonymous account, making mikasa send him screenshots and even screen recordings of her and your boyfriend’s chat for more solid proof. You didn’t believe it at first, denying the proof presented to you.
Until you found yourself at your boyfriend’s apartment, tears stinging your eyes as you held up your phone to show him the screenshots displayed on the screen. Crying while asking him if they’re real and begging him to tell you they’re fake, that it’s just someone wanting to play with your feelings. But when you saw the look in his eyes, shame and regret. You broke down crying, asking him why’d he decide to ruin a perfectly healthy relationship over some girl he met online? Were you not pretty enough for him? Did she love him better than you did? Deciding to just leave and not hurt yourself any longer by staying here as your ex-boyfriend chases after you. Calling you and yelling for you to wait.
As soon as you got back home, you didn’t even bother changing clothes–laying down on your bed with your phone in your hands, watching as it buzzed from the calls your ex was spamming you with, along with his desperate text messages. You dragged your finger across the block button, not thinking twice as you pressed on it. Switching apps to block him everywhere. You even deleted the story highlight, removing him from your bio and deleting posts that he appeared in. When you were finally done, your eyes were red and puffy, swollen from crying too much.

It’s been two days since the breakup and two days since you last posted on instagram. Eren knew that his vicious plan worked, having you dump your boyfriend and getting extra information about you; for example, where you’re settled at.
And what a lovely coincidence, you both live in the exact same city.
eren 🦇
Hey, everything alright? You haven’t been active lately.
Your phone lit up with a notification from; “ern_yger.” You stared at the notification for a while, debating whether or not you should respond to this random stranger who noticed your absence when even your own friends didn’t.
Unlocking your phone and tapping on his notification, dragging your fingers across the keyboard–thinking of a simple, fitting response.
Yeah I’m alright, I’ve just been busy with college.
You clicked send, not thinking twice about your response. Your message has already been seen by eren, you were left on read for two minutes before you saw him typing and while he took his time thinking of a response back you clicked on his profile. You were met with two highlights and zero posts, you clicked on his “me” highlight, feeling your mouth run dry once you were met with a picture of eren shirtless with only a pair of sweatpants and Calvin Klein boxers that peeked out. He was laying down on his side, the room was slightly dim but you were still able to makeout his face. The next one was a picture of his side profile, his hair was put up in a messy bun–his hair also looked soft and messy.
The other picture was taken from a slightly high angle, he was wearing white beaters with gray sweatpants. Once you were about to view the next story, you suddenly got a notification from eren which you accidentally clicked on.
“You sure? I noticed the missing highlights and change of bio.”
If you weren’t in the midst of trying to cope and move on from your past relationship, you would’ve noticed the fake acting concerned tactic men use to get any women they want and in this case, you were in the start of it. And deciding to fuck it and just pour your heart out to this random stranger because you really need it. Need someone to talk to right now and since none of your friends got time for you, you really appreciate eren reaching out to ask about your whereabouts.
You didn’t hold back, venting out your emotions and feelings about your situation. You didn’t leave out a single detail and made sure eren knew exactly how you’re feeling.
Eren was slightly taken aback by your reaction and willingness to share your private life with him. He even felt bad for you, you seemed genuinely upset and hurt but that still wouldn’t make him give up on chasing you. He comforted you for a bit, sending you long reassuring paragraphs. And eren slightly cringed at himself, he has never done this type of thing before—never in his life has he ever had a girl vent out her feelings to him and have him comfort her.
At the end you thanked him a lot for listening to you and apologizing for "being a bother" which eren responded with: “Not at all, I was the one who reached out first, don’t apologize.” You liked the message and thanked him once again before going on with your night.
It’s been three months since your breakup. And three months after you started talking to eren, he helped distract you from thinking about your past partner. He was funny, kind and understanding, everything you looked for in a man. You both even shared the same clothing style, music style and humor.
You didn’t have any bad intentions while talking to eren–you weren’t trying to use him to help you forget about your ex boyfriend. He was the one always texting first, asking you how you are, cracking jokes, sending you songs that he thinks you might like (you always end up loving them), sends you both movies & tv shows suggestions–he says they’ll help with distracting you and keeping your mind occupied from thinking about anything related to your past love.
While eren was the one filled with bad intentions and thoughts. First thing he did in the morning was check his phone for any notifications from you and if he got one, a wide smile would form on the corner of his lips–immediately unlocking his phone to respond back. And if he doesn’t receive a message from you, he’d unlock his phone only to be met with “sent 9 hours ago”, he’d aggressively throw his phone back to his bed. Sometimes gritting his teeth in anger and frustration, stressing over you not texting back.
But as soon as he does get a response back, he’d immediately forget all his anger and frustration from earlier. Telling you that it’s alright and to not apologize once you tell him how you fell asleep because you were too tired and ended up oversleeping which were followed by a bunch of apologies from you. And eren dismissed them, reassuring you by saying it’s okay and he really doesn’t mind—acting like he wasn’t absolutely losing his shit over you moments ago.
Second thing he does is go through your highlights. He has seen the pictures in the highlight multiple times but he still always ends up getting mesmerized by your beauty, way too much that he’d accidentally get turned on. An erection forming just by simply staring way too hard on your photos and eren couldn’t contain himself—pulling out his laptop and logging into his instagram and pulling out your highlight.
He’d zoom in on one specific picture, It was you laying down on bed while holding your camera high in the air–You were wearing a spaghetti straps pink tank top with baggy pajama pants. Your cleavage was all out and was very visible due to the high angle. Your face was mostly the main focus as you flashed the camera a small, warm smile.
Eren cupped his bulge, his breathing shifting from steady to unsteady, letting out shaky heavy pants as he lowered his slacks to where they stopped right beneath his knees. Eren’s eyes were heavy, his eyelids threatening to shut close as he started caressing the tip of his dick, kneading the tip roughly with his thumbs. Spreading his pre-cum all over the tip and slowly coming down to his shaft, massaging his hands up and down his length as his eyes were glued to the picture of you plastered on the screen in front of him.
A moan of your name slipped past his lips, his head slightly thrown back, his eyes were squinted–his hands wrapped around his cock as he messily jerked himself off. Curses and moans kept leaving eren the more he stared at your photo and the more his fantasies about you grew wild. Thinking about splitting you open with his cock while you whine and babble about how big he was, having you gush and cream all over his cock multiple times until you pass out from overstimulation.
Eren fastened his movements, squeezing the head of his cock as you kept flooding his mind and not even 5 minutes had passed and eren was already cumming all over his laptop screen. Staring at the bright screen with half-lidded eyes, his cum staining your picture that was displayed on the screen–he was letting out loud heavy pants, thinking up a way to make you his quickly and fast because eren can’t keep going on like this and it pains him knowing that he lives in the same city as you but still feels as if he was too far away from reaching you.
Eren’s phone lit up with a notification from you, a small smile spread across his lips as he stared back into his laptop screen before grabbing his phone and clicking on your notification. You sent him a couple pictures of yourself, asking him which one to post. Eren felt his heart flutter, staring at your photos in absolute awe. He clicked on each one of your pictures and saved them to his device.
He wanted to tell you to post all of them and that you look beautiful in each one of them but the idea of other men seeing your pictures ticked eren off, he didn’t want other men to see you, just the thought of it had eren boiling up with anger—with furrowed eyebrows, eren aggressively typed you a response back, a not very nice one.
“None. They’re not post worthy and the camera quality makes you look off,” which wasn’t true at all. Eren was sure that even with a poor camera quality you’d still manage to look good.
You stared at eren’s response for a while and then went and looked back at the pictures and the more you kept thinking about his reply the more his words started to seem true, maybe you do actually look kinda bad in these pictures…even though you finally got ready for the first time after the breakup. You did your hair, makeup and carefully selected an outfit for these pictures. You decided to just brush it off, you could take better ones next time.
“Oh okay! I won’t post them then.”

It has now been six months. You and eren started talking more frequently and even started going on both regular and face-time calls. And eren couldn’t be happier, your voice was soft and soothing, every time you sent him voice messages of you ranting about your day to him, he’d melt from the sound of your voice, he’d replay the voice message multiple times throughout the day. Your voice brings him both comfort and easeniss.
But then again, eren was sick in the head. He was the definition of the word ‘deranged’ but you still didn’t know that yet.
The way he’d wrap his hands around his cock while you two were on a call together, he would be on mute as you talked to him about random things–thinking that eren was listening to you but he was more focused on rubbing his aching, hard cock to the sound of your voice.
Every time you notice the silence you’d ask him if he’s alright, concern visible in your tone. Eren would reply with a shaky, low; “y-yeah” accidentally stuttering which he cursed himself for it in his head. Fisting his cock rapidly as you went back to talking. Eren loves it when you have a bad day, he’d get the chance to hear you whine and complain, sometimes on the verge of tears as you rant to him about your bad day, it makes his cock hard against his pants.
11:10PM.
You posted a picture of you in your story but you weren’t alone in the picture, a young man who looked eren’s age with short, light ash-brown hair with the sides and back trimmed shorter; making them a darker hue. He had small, intense light-brown eyes. His hands were wrapped around your waist making both of your shoulders touch.
Eren’s eyes twitched in anger, his brows knitted together as he swiped up and replied; “Who’s this?” you immediately replied with “A friend of mine! :)” eren left you on delivered, his jealousy over-taking him as he kept looking back at the picture, the way you happily smiled at the camera and the way you willingly allowed that guy to touch you like that pissed him off. A lot of thoughts ran through his head, one of them was marking you and making you his already.
An idea popped up in eren’s head. Quickly grabbing his phone and opening up the chat between you two, completely ignoring what you said earlier and typing out; “You free this friday?”
You opened the text and looked at it in utter confusion.
y/n 🐐
what do you mean?
eren 🦇
I’m asking if you’re free this friday? You know, maybe come over to my place.
y/n 🐐
Come over? To your place? I’m sorry but i can’t.
eren 🦇
Why not? It’s finally time we meet up, don’tya think?
y/n 🐐
We could meet up anywhere else, it shouldn’t be your place.
eren 🦇
What? don’t trust me?
y/n 🐐
it’s not that, it’s just that i’ve never met you before.
eren 🦇
Well obviously you didn’t? but we went on facetime calls and we’ve been close friends for months now. I even helped you get over your ex-boyfriend and you still don’t trust me yet?
Eren stared at his screen for a while, hoping that his guilt tripping tactic works. And to his surprise, it did;
y/n 🐐
You’re right, i’m sorry. What time?
Eren lets out a long sigh that he didn’t know he was holding.
“7pm is good.”
Friday, 7:30PM.
You wore a simple pink dress that reached above your knees with black thigh highs and throwed in a plain black jacket to cover up a bit. You were outside of eren’s residence, your breathing thickened before you reached out to grab your phone to tell eren you’re here.
y/n 🐐
i’m here.
sent 7:35PM.
eren 🦇
doors’ unlocked
seen at 7:35PM.
Your brows furrowed together before you turned off your phone and walked towards eren’s doorstep, hesitantly–you slowly unlocked the door of his house. And once the door was wide open, you were met with an empty hallway, a fish tank that was filled with various colorful fishes that decorated said hallway. “Eren?” you whispered his name as you walked in and closed the door behind you, slowly proceeding further into his place.
You were inspecting the furniture, everything looked so luxurious–that you were afraid to touch anything. You heard chirping noises and decided to follow the sound, a mottled grey colored, medium-sized parrot with a vent and a tail. It had a large black bill and a white mask enclosing a yellow eye, as well as a striking red vent and a tail. An african gray parrot was just sitting there in a silver cage, with his food and water in front of it.
You were admiring the parrot before feeling a large figure pressing his back against yours– “his name is hook,” his voice was deep, it came out as a low murmur, you slightly flinched and turned to face him. “E-Eren?” the teal-eyed man looked straight into you, a warm smile making its way to his face, “mhm?” he went and stood beside you and you slightly moved away to make some space between the two of you.
“Hooks’ a nice name, ‘t fits him,” you turned your back towards eren and went back to admiring the parrot. “You think?” eren tried keeping his eyes at his pet parrot as well but the way the girl of his dream was standing right beside him, in his house, right at this moment–makes him unable to focus on anything that wasn’t you. He side-eyed you to take a quick glance at you, he noticed the height difference between you two, he loved it, it was cute. It turned him on.
Eren cleared his throat which made you turn towards him, “so, wanna come up to my room?” you paused for a moment to think about it before nodding your head. Eren led the way to his room as you walked behind him, giving you an opportunity to look around his place even more. And once you made it to his room, you were shocked by the amount of space and furniture it had. His room was big which made you wonder, why would he need all that space if he lives alone?
His bed was king-sized, it could possibly fit three-four people. He had some posters of his favorite bands, artists and games plastered on his walls, a desk that had his laptop placed on top as well as other random stuff, including studying stationery. His room was well organized and filled with lots of unnecessary stuff as well as another fish tank.
You kept looking around until you spotted a wooden door, thinking of what could be behind that door until it clicked to you–probably a bathroom. He probably doesn’t like going out of his room that much so he designed a bathroom that connected to his room.
“What’dya’ think?” Eren asked before plopping down on the black cushion that was placed beside his bed– “‘ts too big'’ you answered before seating yourself beside eren, he moved closer to you, looking down at your dress, his eyes darting from your top to your thighs, that were half-covered by those thigh-high socks you wore. “I guess but it’s not that bad, is it?” you nodded your head, trying to look at anything that wasn’t eren’s face since he was too close. Way too close that you could probably count his eyelashes from how close he was.
Eren backed up a bit, noticing how uncomfortable you were. Eren grabbed a can of beer from the wooden table and opened it, taking a huge chug out of the can. “Want some?” you gave eren a confused look mixed with a disgusted look, “i prefer water” he playfully rolled his eyes before getting up and placing the beer can on the table. “I’ll go get you some then,” you watched as eren went out of the room–his footsteps fading away.
You sat there patiently before your curiosity grew, wanting to go confirm your suspicions on what’s behind the huge wooden door. You got up, unconsciously walking towards it–you grabbed the handle and pushed it down slowly, making sure to not make any noise. Once you unlocked the door, you were met with a dim room–the only sort of light coming from the three monitors placed on another desk in the room. Three huge monitors that all opened to different tabs.
Deciding to just fuck it and proceed even further–accidentally stepping on something that made a slight crunch noise, looking down and picking it up only to be met with a pornographic comic that had dried up cum splattered all over it. You let go of it quickly, your face scrunching up in disgust as you walked towards the three huge monitors.
You bent down a little to be met with a picture of you which you have posted a while ago displayed on the screen, your throat ran dry once you noticed the gooey white stains on the screen–you looked to the right monitor, an instagram profile opened on it which was one of your years old instagram accounts that you used to own during your teenage years. And the left monitor had the guy you recently posted a picture with instagram account.
You let out a shaky sigh, the guy who you thought was naturally sweet, understanding & charming was the complete opposite. A complete creep, a weird perverted man.
“You caught me,” a mans’ voice came from behind you, making your heart stop for a second–you turned around to face him, eren had a wide smirk curved on the corners of his lips as he leaned against the doorframe, you weren’t sure for how long he has been there watching you but probably long enough to catch your full live reaction.
“What is the meaning of this?” your voice came out low as if you were completely terrified of speaking up; “I don’t know, you tell me” eren walked towards you, shutting the door behind him–you took a step back, your back hitting the wall, eren had completely cornered you giving you no way out. Eren took hold of your chin, forcing you to look back at him–he aggressively moved your chin to the side, allowing himself to give you a small kiss on the neck.
You fluttered your eyes shut, you didn’t try pushing him off as he started nibbling on your neck; covering it with hot, messy kisses. “I’ve been wanting to taste you for so long, been wanting to do this for so long,” eren confessed, making a pit of disgust form in your stomach. Eren slipped a hand under your shirt, squeezing your right breast from above your bra. “Eren please…stop,” you finally managed to say which eren turned a blind eye on, ignoring your pleas for him to stop.
“Come on baby, you’ve made me suffer long enough, don’t ya’ think? Always had to beat my dick to pictures of you but now I finally have you within my grasp, don’t you think I deserve a reward for my patience? Hm?” Eren got on his knees and spread your legs apart, he placed his middle finger on your clit through your panties and started cautiously moving his finger.
You looked down on him with half-lidded eyes, tears pricking the corner of your eyes as you bit your lips to surpass any sounds from slipping. He moved your panties to the side and brushed his digits past your glistening folds before slowly pushing in two fingers into your tight hole, he teasingly started thrusting his fingers sometimes stopping mid-way but the way your slippery walls clamped down on his thick digits encouraged him to continue.
You were out of breath, wanting this to end quickly but the praises eren was muttering made it a tad bit better; “Ah, so good angel, gonna have you cummin’ all over my fingers soon, okay?” “fuck you’re so pretty, ‘ts makin’ my dick hard” he was plunging his fingers deeper into your messy cunt, your silk gushing and dripping all over his fingers. The squelching noises made eren’s cock slightly twitch in his pants as he imagined what kind of things he’ll be able to do to you from now on.
You couldn’t hold in your moans any longer–letting out your moans & whimpers freely as he kept thrusting his finger in n’ out of your pussy, “think..’m close!” you slightly arched your back and squirmed in your place, you placed your hands on your mouth to silent any moans from coming out as you gushed all over eren’s fingers. You were letting out heavy pants, you plopped down on the floor, your eyes glued together not daring to even try taking a quick glance at the mess you’ve made.
Eren lowered his sweatpants–enough for his cock to spring out and slap his abdomen, he moved his hips closer to your face and started rubbing his dick on the side of your cheeks which made you let out a whimper at the sudden warm feeling. “Open up, princess, ‘t hurts, y’know?” he pushed his cock against your lips, smearing his pre-cum all over your plump, glossy lips.
You swallowed your saliva before obeying and opening your mouth, your vision hazy which didn’t give you the chance to make-out eren’s girth. He shoved his cock into your mouth causing you to slightly gag, “s-so good, fuck,” you sloppily started sucking the tip, hollowing your cheeks and bobbing your head up and down his length. Swirling your tongue around his tip while drool dripped down your chin and coating his balls, you moan around his cock while eren lets out soft groans; “so cockhungry, huh?” he snickered–throwing his head back while he was still firmly gripping your hair.
He pushed his cock deeper into your throat causing you to choke a bit, tears rolling down your cheeks uncontrollably, eren started thrusting his hips against your mouth, his dick stretching your throat with every jolt of his hips. “S-Shit,” he sharply inhales, letting go of your hair and cupping both of your cheeks instead. You could feel his cock slightly poking at the side of your throat, a clear bulge.
Moving his hips in a slow, gentle manner–scared to hurt you but the way the head of his cock kept hitting your uvula which caused you to gag around his dick and ruin his steady pace, making his hips stutter and cock slightly pulsate as his shaft land flat on your tongue, “f-fuck, keep this up and i’m gnna’ be cumming all over your face” eren groaned, caressing your face while also letting out shaky moans.
His cock shuddered, twitching inside the warmth of your mouth, “Holy shit…” he mouthened before pulling out his dick with a ‘plop’ sound, your drool was connecting to his tip–your mouth hung open, your tongue stuck out, you were letting out heavy pants as you tried gasping for air. Without any warning, a sudden splash of warm, thick liquid covered your face. Managing to get on your tongue as well, the bitter taste made you flutter your eyes shut in disgust.
His sperm was burning your face, wanting to get it off of you fast and quick while eren was admiring your cum covered face. It stained your cheeks and dripped off your chin, your mascara melted and your lip-gloss got smeared all over your face. He was panting heavily but his gaze still focused on you, half-lidded eyes pierced through you.
“Did so good f’me,” he exclaimed, bending down and gripping your chin before pulling you into another messy kiss. Pulling out with a smug look, you looked back at him with a foggy vision–a small smile made its way to your face and eren heart stopped for a moment, the way you looked at him with droopy eyes, messy face and a smile on your face will forever be engraved deep into his mind.
“Stay here, ‘M gonna make some warm tea for your throat, alright? Clean yourself up, m’kay?” he kissed your forehead before going out and leaving the room, once again. You turned your head towards the monitor, your vision landing on the picture of you, the cum stains making you fill up with shame & guilt even though it’s not you who’s supposed to be feeling like this.
The sound of a notification coming from your phone pulled you out of your thoughts.
eren 🦇
*one image attachment*
Us after i destroy your uterus <3

#eren jaeger x reader#eren smut#eren x reader#aot x reader#aot smut#attack on titan x reader#attack on titan smut#aot eren#ilygetou’s kinktober ⌕
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How We Became Us
Label Mature 18+
Summary You’re a mom first, navigating the chaos of single motherhood with no time or desire for romance. But when a close friend introduces you to a handsome actor, your carefully guarded heart begins to open in ways you never expected.
🔗 Masterlist
💝Romantic Smut 💝 Austin pursuing • slow burn• guarded heart • single mom of 2•friends to lovers• romantic get away• fluff •first kiss•falling in love• sweet talk •body worship •praising •edging • fingering •oral on fem • clit play •sexual awakening• breast play •p in v• multiple orgasms• cream pie

📖 Proofreaders @purejasmine @magicovento


💌 Inspo via request: ( I had to get it perfect ✨ thank you for your patience)
How We Became Us
The movie set buzzed with energy as crew members scurried around adjusting lights, cameras, and equipment.
You stood off to the side, balancing your two-year-old daughter on your hip, her chubby fingers tugging at your necklace, while your four-year-old son played with a toy car at your feet, repeatedly pushing it forward only to chase after it.
His remote control for the car had been misplaced somewhere in the chaos of the morning, so he had resorted to manual play, his determination both endearing and exhausting.
Your best friend, Emily, your childhood confidant turned big-time movie producer, had invited you for a behind-the-scenes visit to her latest project, American Speed. You were more focused on keeping your toddler from drooling all over your shirt than paying attention to the organized chaos around you.
“Come meet someone!” Emily called out, striding toward you with a grin. She gestured to a tall man following her a striking figure with sandy-blonde hair, piercing blue eyes, and a laid-back smile. He wore a plain black T-shirt and jeans that seemed almost too normal for someone in Hollywood.
“This is Austin Butler,” Emily introduced. “Austin, this is my best friend I’ve been telling you about, and these are her little ones—”
“Jack and Lily,” you filled in, shifting your daughter on your hip as her toy slipped to the ground. “Sorry, I don’t have a free hand to shake.”
Austin bent down, picking up the toy before holding it out. “No problem. I think I’ve got this.” His warm smile lingered on your daughter as he gently handed the toy back to her. She giggled, and your heart warmed, but you weren’t about to let yourself be charmed that easily.
You cocked an eyebrow. “You don’t mind a little baby drool?”
“Not at all,” he said, straightening up. “I like kids.”
Emily smirked. “Austin’s starring in the movie. He’s kind of a big deal right now.”
“Ah,” you said, nonchalantly, bouncing Lily on your hip. “Sorry, I don’t keep up with movies these days. The last thing I saw in theaters was Sonic the Hedgehog Three and only because Jack begged me.”
Austin chuckled, looking genuinely amused. “I can’t compete with Sonic, but I’ll take what I can get.”
His easygoing demeanor caught you off guard, and you found yourself smiling despite your initial wariness. Still, you had no intention of getting swept up in Hollywood charm. You were here for Emily and your kids.
The conversation shifted as Emily took Jack’s hand to show him around the set, leaving you and Austin standing there. “Let me guess,” you said. “You’re used to women throwing themselves at you?”
His laugh was soft and genuine. “Is it that obvious?”
“Just a hunch.” You adjusted Lily’s position and gave him a pointed look. “Don’t expect me to join the fan club.”
That only seemed to intrigue him more. “I wasn’t planning on it,” he said. “But how about coffee instead?”
Your eyes narrowed. “You’re asking me out? After knowing me for five minutes?”
“More like six,” he teased, his hands slipping into his pockets. “But yeah. I like your vibe.”
Emily returned at that moment, overhearing the exchange. “Go, I’ll watch the kids. You deserve a break.”
You hesitated. “I don’t think—”
“Go,” Emily insisted, already reaching for Lily. “Seriously. I’ve got this.”
Before you could argue, Lily was out of your arms, and Jack was waving happily as Emily led them away. Austin tilted his head toward the lot exit. “What do you say?”
With a resigned sigh, you followed him.
The café was small and cozy, a short walk from the studio, tucked away from the glitz of the city. You stirred your coffee absently as Austin sat across from you, his gaze steady. He was too attractive for his own good, but you weren’t about to let that rattle you.
“So,” he began, “what’s your story? How’d you end up raising two awesome kids on your own?”
You gave him a guarded smile. “That’s a long story. And not exactly first-date material.”
He nodded, his expression softening. “Fair enough. What should I know about you, then?”
“That I’m a mom first, everything else second. And I’m not looking for… this.” You gestured between the two of you. “Whatever it is.”
“Why not?” he asked, his tone curious rather than pushy.
“Because I’ve been burned before,” you admitted, your voice firm. “And I’m not interested in repeating history.”
Austin leaned forward, resting his forearms on the table. “I get that. But not everyone’s going to hurt you.”
You met his gaze, something in his sincerity making you falter. “I don’t need saving, Austin.”
“I didn’t say you did,” he replied softly. “But maybe you deserve something good.”
His words hung in the air as you exchanged soft smiles and soon you slipped effortlessly into other topics. He understood your humor with ease, and the way he listened, really listened when you spoke, felt both disarming and endearing.
You got along so well that before you knew it, he smiled and asked for your number. Hesitant and caught off guard by how natural it felt, you found yourself slowly grinning as you typed it into his phone.
By the time you returned to the set, you had convinced yourself it was just a harmless coffee date, not the start of anything real—
Kneeling down to Jack and Lily’s level, his smile was warm and genuine.
“It was great meeting you, Jack,” he said, offering a light fist bump that made your son beam with pride. Then he turned to Lily, his tone soft and playful. “And you, little Lily, take good care of your mom, okay?” He grinned , and she giggled, clutching your leg shyly. Austin cutely winked at you before standing back up, the small gesture almost making you part of his fan club—though you’d never admit it.
Later that evening after you’d settled in from a whirlwind day your phone buzzed. Seeing Austin’s name appear on the screen so soon surprised you, but you picked up quickly brushing your excitement aside.
“Hey,” he greeted, his voice calm and confident. “I just wanted to say I really enjoyed meeting you today… and…” he paused for a moment, his tone carrying a hint of warmth, “I was wondering if you’re available for dinner at the end of the week. You know, so I can steal a little more of your time before you come up with an excuse to avoid me.”
You held back your laugh, and even though the guarded part of you wanted to say no, your curiosity got the better of you. “Dinner, huh? That’s a lot longer than a coffee date. You think you can handle me for that long?” you quipped, keeping your tone playful, even as the flutter in your stomach betrayed your nerves.
His chuckle was rich and smooth. “Oh, I can handle you,” he said, his tone laced with just enough confidence to make your cheeks warm.
You rolled your eyes to avoid showing it, but you couldn’t stop the smile creeping across your face. “Fine, dinner. But don’t think I’m easy to impress,” you said, trying to sound indifferent.
“Noted,” he replied, and you could practically hear the grin in his voice. “Friday at seven?”
“Friday at seven,” you agreed, already mentally running through your list of babysitters.
By Friday evening, you were standing in front of your closet, sighing at the assortment of clothing. Why were you so caught up in what to wear for him?
You settled on a modest yet flattering outfit—a fitted black dress with a low neck and long sleeves. It hugged your waist just enough to feel confident without being over the top. You paired it with simple earrings and ankle boots, letting your natural spark shine through with a subtle rouge lip.
When you arrived downtown at the restaurant it was a modern elegant Italian place with dim lighting and flickering candles reflecting off the polished marble floors and glass walls.
Austin was already there, waiting in the lobby. He looked effortlessly put together in a black shirt and suit jacket that highlighted his broad shoulders and dark jeans. He uncrossed his arms as you approached, a calm smile softening his handsome face.
“You look amazing,” he said, his voice warm and sincere.
“Don’t start,” you replied with a grin, though the way his gaze lingered on you made you feel like you were glowing.
He opened the doors for you and led you into the dining area, an enchanting space housed under a grand dome. The walls were lined with lush, cascading plants, and soft golden lights intertwined with the greenery, creating an ethereal glow.
Overhead, the glass dome revealed the night sky in all its splendor, the stars twinkling like scattered diamonds. The combination of natural beauty and elegance made the atmosphere feel both romantic and magical.
The tables were small and intimate, each adorned with a single candle. As you sat down, you couldn’t help but notice how at ease Austin seemed, his calm demeanor contrasting with your nervous energy.
Over a a few glasses of wine, you found yourself loosening up, your playful side surfacing as you bantered with him.
“So,” he asked, leaning forward slightly, “What was the funniest thing Jack or Lily did this week?”
You grinned, swirling your wine. “Well, Jack decided to wear his Spider-Man pajamas to school the other day and told his teacher he was ready to save the world.”
Austin chuckled, his smile warm and genuine. “He’s in character—I like that,” he said, leaning back slightly. “Kid’s got commitment.”
You could barely contain your laugh. “Well then, you’ll really enjoy this—Lily has convinced herself she’s a cat. Full meowing and everything.”
You both laughed, the sound deep and genuine, filling the cozy space between you. Austin shook his head, his gaze softening as he looked at you. “The kids are their own little variety show. I can see why you’re smiling all the time,” he said, his tone warm and sincere.
“You have no idea,” you replied, your guard slipping as the conversation flowed. “They’re my world.”
“I can see that,” he said, his tone softening. “You’re an incredible mom.”
The compliment caught you off guard, and for a moment, you didn’t know what to say. You looked down, taking a sip of your wine to compose yourself. “Thanks,” you said finally, your voice quieter.
By the time the plates were cleared, the conversation had shifted to everything from your childhood memories to guilty pleasure movies. His calm, patient presence coaxed you out of your shell, and before long, you were laughing so hard you nearly spilled your drink.
After dinner as you stepped outside into the crisp evening air, you turned to him, your cheeks slightly flushed from the wine and laughter. “Okay, I’ll admit it,” you said with a teasing smile. “I was really impressed this evening Austin.”
“I’ll take that as high praise,” he smiled, his eyes sparkling as he stepped closer. “But I think I can do better.”
Before you could respond, he leaned in, his lips kissing yours softly at first, as if waiting for permission.
You froze for a split second, caught off guard that it was even happening, but then you melted into the kiss, clutching his firm arms to steady yourself. His scent was warm and woodsy, with hints of vanilla and bourbon, and the way he held you made your heart race.
When he pulled back, you blinked up at him, trying to gather your thoughts. “I…uh… that was so.. h—unexpected,” you said, your tone uncertain as your voice trembled slightly.
“Was it bad?” he asked with a playful smirk.
“No!” you blurted out too quickly. “No, it wasn’t bad at all, Austin… it was so good—it was really good . I just—”
Before you could finish, he leaned in and kissed you again, this time with even more intensity.
His hand cupped your cheek, steady and warm, as his lips moved against yours. Your entire body relaxed as the kiss deepened, your mouth sliding over his in a way that made your thoughts scatter.
He tasted so good—like wine and something unmistakably him. He felt so good, so irresistible, that it made you frantic, your hands gripping his jacket as you leaned closer, consumed by the fire of his intensity.
His other hand found your waist, anchoring you as your kisses grew more heated, your mouths moving together like you couldn’t get enough of each other. The world around you blurred, reduced to the warmth of his touch and the way he made you feel, and for the first time in a long time you were unmistakably aroused
With a soft gasp, you pulled back, your chest rising and falling, breathless, your mind spinning. “I—I should go,” you said quickly, avoiding his eyes as you tried to compose yourself.
Austin tilted his head slightly, concern flickering across his face. “Are you alright?” he asked, as his thumb stroked your cheek gently.
His voice was calm and patient, his tone making it impossible to ignore the genuine care in his words.
“Yes,” you nodded, forcing a smile. “I’m fine. Really. Just—it’s late.”
“Alright,” he said with a soft smile and without hesitation, he walked with you toward the valet stand.
As you waited for your cars, he stayed close, his fingers brushed against your shoulder lightly at first then, his hand slid lower, resting gently on your waist, his thumb grazing your hip absentmindedly. The casual intimacy of it made your stomach flip, as the entire time, all you could think about was how badly you wanted to climb him like a tree.
Your car arrived first, and as the valet opened the door, you turned to him. Unable to resist, you leaned in for a quick hug, your arms wrapping around his firm chest. The scent of him—warm, woodsy, and undeniably intoxicating—filled your senses, and for a brief moment, you let yourself get lost in it, your mind overtaken by the smell of him.
When you pulled back, his eyes searched yours, affectionate and soft, like he was trying to understand what you were thinking.
“Good night,” you said, your voice soft and reluctant, lingering in the air between you.
“Good night,” he replied, his tone low and smooth, laced with a quiet intensity that made your stomach flutter. His eyes lingered on yours, and the way his lips curved into a subtle, knowing smile felt almost seductive, as though he was daring you to stay just a moment longer.
You bit your lip as you stepped back, resisting the overwhelming urge to close the distance between you and kiss him again.
Instead, you turned quickly and climbed into your car, your hands gripping the wheel tightly. As you drove away, you glanced back at him in your rearview mirror, his tall figure still standing there, watching you leave. His scent still clung to you, warm and intoxicating, and your mind raced with thoughts you weren’t quite ready to face.
Over the next few weeks, Austin was extremely busy with filming, but he still found little ways to remain a part of your life.
You were busy with work and wrangling your little ones, but the two of you FaceTimed when you could, and every time, he made a point to say hi to Jack and Lily. They adored him, and his genuine warmth toward them made it harder for you to keep your guard up.
One evening, he asked for your address and casually suggested a playdate. “If it’s okay, I’d love to take you and the kids somewhere fun,” he said, his voice calm but hopeful. You hesitated for only a moment before agreeing. His excitement was contagious.
On Saturday, Austin picked the three of you up and drove to a sprawling outdoor park with a petting zoo, a huge playground, and plenty of open space. The day was crisp and sunny, and the laughter of children filled the air. Jack and Lily were wide eyed with excitement as they took in the colorful slides, swings, and the fenced area with goats and bunnies.
Austin was a natural. He jumped right into the action, helping Jack climb the rock wall on the playground and pushing Lily on the swings, her giggles echoing through the park. “Higher, Austin!” she squealed, and he laughed, obliging her with a playful grin.
When they wandered over to the petting zoo, Austin crouched down with Lily, gently showing her how to hold out her hand for a baby bunny to nibble on. “See? Just like this,” he said, his tone patient and encouraging. Jack ran up, curious, and Austin seamlessly shifted his attention, answering Jack’s million questions about the animals with the same enthusiasm.
The whole time, he was equally attentive to you. He carried Lily when she got tired, helped Jack when he scraped his knee, and made sure you had a moment to breathe.
“You okay?” he asked softly when the kids were momentarily distracted, his hand resting lightly on your shoulder, his blue eyes full of quiet concern.
You nodded, a warm smile spreading across your face. “I’m fine,” you said, your voice soft but genuine. “This… this is wonderful.”
His lips curved into a gentle smile before he leaned in, brushing an encouraging, kiss against your lips. The tenderness of it, the way he made you feel so seen and cared for, made your heart flutter and left you completely swooning. You barely managed to catch your breath before he pulled back, his gaze lingering on you for a moment longer before he turned back to check on the kids.
By the end of the day, the kids were tired but beaming, their hands sticky from ice cream cones Austin had insisted on treating them to. Jack climbed onto his back without hesitation, declaring him “the coolest grown-up ever,” while Lily clung to his hand, refusing to let go.
On the drive home, the kids fell asleep in the backseat, and you turned to him, overwhelmed by how effortlessly he had fit into your little world. “You’re really good with them,” you said softly, watching as his lips curved into a small smile.
“They’re great kids,” he replied, glancing at you for a moment before focusing back on the road. “And you’re an amazing mom. It’s easy to see why they’re so special.”
You didn’t know how to respond, so you just smiled, the warmth of his words lingering in your chest. By the time he dropped you off, you realized something you hadn’t let yourself admit before—Austin wasn’t just charming or fun. He was something more, something steady, someone you could rely on.
The next week, Emily called, insisting on coming over for wine in the evening . When she arrived, she was practically glowing, a bottle of your favorite wine in one hand and gifts in the other.
“Okay, don’t kill me, but I’m just the delivery person here,” she said with a grin as she stepped inside. She placed the wine on the counter and held up the items in her arms. “This,” she said, presenting the remote-controlled car, “is for Jack. Austin heard he lost the remote to his old one and said no kid should be without a car they can crash into furniture.”
You rolled your eyes, but your lips twitched into a reluctant smile. “Of course he did.”
“And this,” she continued, holding up a handmade bunny quilt, “is for Lily. Austin found it at some little shop and said it reminded him of her. Thought it would be perfect for her to snuggle with.”
Your chest tightened despite yourself, but you kept your expression neutral. “That’s… thoughtful.”
“Oh, and the wine?” Emily added, gesturing to the bottle on the counter. “That’s from him, too. He said, and I quote, ‘Moms deserve their favorites, too.’”
You sighed softly, shaking your head, but couldn’t entirely stop the smile spreading across your lips.
Every heartfelt gesture from Austin chipped away at your defenses, despite your best efforts to resist.
Later that night, Jack was already asleep when you peeked into his room. He was clutching the new remote-controlled car to his chest, his little face peaceful in the dim glow of his nightlight. You smiled softly, adjusting the blanket over him before stepping out.
In Lily’s room, Emily was already there, kneeling beside the bed as she tucked the bunny quilt from Austin snugly around her.
Lily smiled sleepily, murmuring something incoherent about ‘ her bunny blanky” before drifting off. You leaned against the doorway for a moment, watching Emily smooth the blanket gently over Lily’s tiny form, a look of affection on her face.
You stepped into the room quietly, standing beside Emily as the two of you looked down at Lily, her breathing soft and even.
“She’s adorable,” Emily whispered, her voice low so as not to wake her. “Just like Jack.”
You nodded, a faint smile on your lips.
Emily glanced at you, her expression shifting to something more serious. “Austin is entirely smitten with you, you know,” she said softly, her voice barely above a whisper. “And honestly? You should give him a chance. He’s a good guy.”
You sighed, your gaze fixed on Lily’s peaceful face. “Good guys don’t exist,” you muttered, almost to yourself.
“They do,” Emily said, her tone firm but gentle. “And he’s one of them.”
The two of you stood there for a moment longer, the quiet of the room settling around your thoughts, and despite your best efforts, they drifted to Austin.
His thoughtful gestures, his warm smile, the way he spoke to Jack and Lily like they were the most important people in the world—it all tugged at something deep inside you.
Over the next month, each date with Austin chipped away at your walls. Whether it was sharing stories over dinner, walking through the park hand-in-hand, or watching a movie with Jack and Lily nestled between you, he made every moment feel meaningful.
The kisses grew deeper, more frequent, and harder to pull away from, leaving you breathless each time. He never rushed you, but his quiet patience and unwavering care made it impossible not to feel safe with him. Slowly, you began to trust him, to let him into the spaces you’d kept so carefully guarded.
One evening, as the kids were decorating a small Christmas tree in the living room, Austin sat beside you on the couch, the glow of the twinkling lights casting a soft warmth over his face.
Christmas had always been a stressful time for you. Your ex had made it that way, his constant criticism, belittling remarks, and refusal to help turning what should have been a joyous season into a source of dread. The kids had felt it too, the tension in the air overshadowing their excitement.
It had left you doing everything you could to distract and shield Jack and Lily from his moods. Even now, the memories of those Christmases lingered, making it hard to feel the holiday spirit.
“Christmas is a few weeks away,” Austin chimed in, his voice calm but with a hint of nervousness. “And I know this time of year isn’t always easy for you…” He said his hand rested gently on your knee, his thumb brushing against it. “But…I was thinking—what if you and the kids spent the holidays with me? At my villa in the mountains.”
You blinked, caught off guard. “Your villa?” you asked, trying to keep your voice steady.
He smiled, leaning slightly closer. “Yeah. It’s quiet, peaceful. There’s a big fireplace, snow-covered hills, and even a spot for sledding. Jack and Lily would love it. And… I’d really like to spend Christmas with all of you.”
You hesitated, glancing toward the kids, who were now deciding over the placement of an ornament. The idea was tempting, but memories of past holidays made you pause. “Austin, I don’t know…”
His fingers tightened slightly on your knee, his gaze steady. “You deserve a Christmas that feels good. And so do the kids. Let me give that to you.”
The sincerity in his voice made you take a deep breath. You looked at him, his hopeful expression, and couldn’t help but give in. “Okay,” you said softly, nodding. “We’ll spend Christmas with you.”
His grin was immediate, lighting up his entire face. “You won’t regret it,” he promised, leaning in to press a tender kiss to your lips.
The drive to the mountains from the airport was an exciting drive. Jack could barely stay still, practically bouncing in his seat as Austin navigated the winding snowy roads. Lily, strapped in her car seat, clapped her tiny hands together every so often, babbling happily about “ big trees” as the snow-covered forest grew thicker with every mile.
When the cabin finally came into view, your breath caught. It was stunning—a sleek, modern design with large glass windows that reflected the surrounding snow-covered landscape. Nestled in a lake bed, the cabin was surrounded by towering evergreens dusted with fresh snow. The lake itself was frozen, shimmering like glass in the crisp winter light.
“Wow,” Jack breathed, pressing his face to the window. “Mom, look at all the snow!”
“It’s beautiful,” you confessed, your voice soft with awe as you stared at the serene scene in front of you.
Austin pulled into the driveway, his grin wide and full of joy as he glanced at you. “Wait until you see the inside,” he said, stepping out of the car and immediately opening the door for you and the kids. “C’mon, Jack. Let’s get your sister.”
Jack scrambled out, immediately grabbing handfuls of snow. “Ahhh It’s so cold!” he exclaimed, laughing as he threw it into the air.
Austin chuckled, unbuckling Lily and lifting her into his arms. She let out a delighted squeal, pointing at the snow with her tiny fingers. “Snow snow snow!” she babbled, her cheeks pink from the cold.
“It’s cold, sweetheart,” Austin said softly, pulling her scarf higher as he carried her toward the cabin. “Let’s get you inside where it’s warm.”
The cabin’s interior was just as breathtaking as the exterior. The open floor plan had a large stone fireplace in the living area, with cozy furniture arranged around it. Floor-to-ceiling windows offered a panoramic view of the snowy landscape, and a fully decorated Christmas tree stood in the corner, twinkling with lights.
“This is…” You trailed off, taking it all in. “Austin, this is amazing.”
He adjusted Lily on his hip and smiled. “I wanted it to feel special—for all of you.”
Jack immediately began exploring, his excitement infectious as he darted from room to room. “Mom! There’s a bunk bed! And a big kitchen!” he called out, his voice echoing through the space.
Austin laughed as he watched Jack with a proud expression. “I think he approves.”
You smiled, shaking your head. “I think we all do.”
The next few days were filled with moments that felt like magic.
Jack and Lily experienced snow fall for the first time, their laughter filling the air as Austin pulled them on sleds down gentle hills near the cabin.
Jack insisted on building the biggest snowman ever, and Austin happily obliged, rolling snow into giant mounds while Lily giggled, toddling after him and attempting to help with her tiny mittens.
Later, you all sat inside by the fire, steaming mugs of hot cocoa in hand. Lily held her sippy cup with both hands, sipping carefully, while Jack sat cross-legged on the floor, playing with his toys.
The warmth of the fire wrapped around you, and for the first time in years, you felt the tension of the holidays melt away.
Austin sat beside you, his eyes soft as he watched Jack and Lily. “They’re amazing, you know,” he said, his voice low and full of emotion.
“They are,” you agreed, glancing at him. You couldn’t help but look at him with affection, your heart swelling at how effortlessly he fit into your little family. Without thinking, you brought your legs over his lap. He smiled at the gesture, his hand resting on your knee, rubbing gentle circles with his thumb,
“You look so happy,” he said, his tone light but sincere. “It looks beautiful on you.”
You felt your cheeks warm and looked away, watching the kids. “I am happy,” you admitted softly. “This… this is all so perfect.”
He pulled you closer, his thumb brushing over your waist. “You deserve perfect, you know that? And so do they.”
You turned to him, your heart catching in your chest. “Austin…”
Before you could finish, Jack looked up from his toys. “Can we go sledding again tomorrow?” he asked, his face full of hope.
Austin grinned, his smile warm and genuine. “Now that you know how we can even have a race tomorrow.” He said excitedly.
Jack whooped with happiness, and even Lily let out a tiny squeal of approval, clapping her hands together with delight.
Later that night, as the snow fell lightly outside, you watched Austin tuck the kids into bed with a tenderness that melted your heart.
He listened intently to Jack’s excited chatter about sled racing and gently adjusted Lily’s bunny quilt as she murmured sleepily. The way he handled everything with such care stirred emotions within you that you had never fully allowed yourself to feel for him.
Quietly, you slipped away, heading to your room. After a warm, soothing bath, you wrapped yourself in a robe and walked to the dresser. Nerves overtaking you as you opened the drawer, your eyes falling on the lingerie you’d packed but had been dreading to wear.
It was simple yet elegant—a soft, black lace slip that hugged your curves just enough to make you question if you could really go through with it. You stood there for a moment, hesitating, your heart pounding in your chest as you wrestled with both excitement and uncertainty.
After the kids were sound asleep, you gathered your courage and walked down the hall in your lingerie slip toward Austin’s bedroom.
Your heart pounded as you hesitated at the doorway, nerves fluttering wildly in your stomach.
You raised your hand and gently knocked, the sound somehow louder in the quiet house. For a brief moment, you thought about retreating, but before you could, his calm, deep voice called out.
“You don’t have to knock,” he said softly, his tone warm and inviting.
Stepping inside, the room was bathed in the soft glow of the crackling fireplace, the flickering light casting shadows across the walls.
Austin stood near the foot of the bed, dressed in gray sweats and a simple white t-shirt. His sandy blonde hair was slightly tousled, and his blue eyes, illuminated by the firelight, were filled with tenderness as they locked on yours.
“I don’t know how to do this,” you admitted quietly, taking a hesitant step forward.
His expression softened, and he crossed the room to you, taking your hands gently in his. His palms were warm and grounding, his thumbs brushing lightly over your knuckles. “Just cuddle with me ,” he said, his voice steady and reassuring.
You smiled as he led you to the bed and sat down with you. He laid back, propping himself up on one elbow, and gently pulled you down beside him. The closeness of his presence calmed you, and as you rested your head against his firm chest, the steady rhythm of his heartbeat grounded you in the moment as you both looked at the fire place.
“I care about you so much,” he said after a long silence, his fingers lightly tracing circles on your arm. “You, Jack, Lily—you’re everything to me now.”
You looked up at him, your heart swelling as his words washed over you. “Austin…” you whispered, unable to find the right words, but the way you gazed at him said everything.
He pressed a soft kiss to your forehead, his lips lingering for a moment before his hand slid to your jaw, his touch gentle but firm, as he tilted your chin up.
Then he kissed your lips—heartfelt and tender—as he brushed them softly against yours, his movements were unhurried and full of emotion.
You whimpered into his kiss, eager and unable to hold back. Your hands trailed up his strong neck, your fingers tangling in his hair as you pulled him closer, kissing him deeper, needing more.
His other hand rested on your stomach, his fingers brushing the lace of your slip. Slowly, he let his hand wander lower, testing your reaction. You didn’t stop him—in fact, you arched slightly, giving him permission, and his hand slipped into your panties just as his tongue slipped into your mouth, the dual sensations drawing a soft moan from your lips.
He glided his fingers up and down your wetness, each movement deliberate and teasing. Your body responded eagerly, and when he pushed two fingers inside, a gasp escaped you. You kissed him deeper, your lips parting for him as his tongue matched the rhythm of his hand, the intimacy leaving you trembling and craving more.
Your breaths grew ragged as his long, deft fingers curled deep inside you in a way that made you see stars. You cupped his jaw, pulling him closer, devouring his mouth hungrily as your hips moved against his hand. His other hand tugged the strap of your slip down, exposing your breast, and he wasted no time lowering his lips to it.
His mouth was warm and wet as he sucked your nipple, his tongue flicking the sensitive peak with precision. He alternated between soft teasing pulls and harder deeper sucks that made you cry out softly, your hands gripping his shoulders.
You couldn’t hold back any longer, your moans turning into soft, broken cries of pleasure as his fingers moved faster, as his mouth sucked your nipples. Your vision blurred, and every nerve in your body seemed to ignite as waves of pleasure rippled through you. “Oh, Austin—Austin!” you gasped, your hips pushing up involuntarily as you orgasmed the release sending tingles through every inch of your body.
Your breaths came in desperate, shuddering gasps of pleasure as he kept his fingers inside you, kissing his way down your trembling body, his lips warm and gentle as they pressed along your thighs.
He pulled your panties down slowly, his gaze lingering on you with a mix of desire and reverence as his mouth lowered on to your clit. His tongue flicked and circled with expert precision as his fingers continued thrusting inside you. You babbled incoherently, unable to form words as your body writhed beneath him, the intensity of his touch consuming you entirely.
Just when you thought you couldn’t take any more, he slipped his fingers out, replacing them with his mouth, his tongue working you over with devastating skill.
His movements pushed you over the edge as another powerful orgasm tore through you, your cries of his name echoing in the room as your body shuddered beneath him.
When he finally pulled back, you were breathless, your body limp and your core throbbing.
He climbed back up, his eyes filled with affection and lust as he stripped off his shirt, revealing his sculpted chest and strong, defined abs. You couldn’t stop the soft “yes, yes,” that slipped from your lips as you tugged off your lingerie and slid out of your panties in return. Then you spread your legs open for him, lying fully exposed on his bed.
He smiled, his voice low and full of promise. “I’m going to take my time with you,” he said, his blue eyes locked on yours as he pushed down his sweats.
You nodded, your voice trembling with need . “Take whatever you want Austin.” You breathed.
His smile widened as he leaned down, kissing you. “That’s what I love about you,” he whispered against your lips. “You give yourself so completely—so openly—when you finally let go for me. It makes me want to protect that trust with everything I have.”
His words made you gasp against his lips. You couldn’t respond at first, your breath caught in your throat as his hand cupped your face, his thumb brushing your cheek. “Give me all of you,” he murmured, his voice low and filled with longing. “Every part of you. I’ll take care of it—I’ll take care of you. I promise.”
“Yes,” you breathed, your voice trembling with emotion. “Yes… please, yes.” Your hands reached up, threading into his hair, pulling him closer as if you couldn’t bear to let him go. “Take all of me,” you whispered, your voice barely audible as you surrendered completely.
He aligned his cock to your slick wet entrance and pushed in slowly, the stretch making your eyes flutter shut as you took all of him inch by inch.
He groaned low in his throat, the sound vibrating through his chest as he stilled letting you adjust to his size. His hands cupped your breasts, his thumbs brushing over your sensitive nipples, eliciting soft gasps from you as he slowly began to thrust.
Every coherent thought left your mind, replaced by the overwhelming sensation of him—his size, his warmth, the way he filled you so completely. His mouth claimed yours, devouring it hungrily, and your moans were muffled against his lips, soft and pleading as you melted beneath him.
When you became breathless, he pulled back, his lips brushing over your jaw before lowering to your chest. He hunched over you, lowering his mouth to your breasts, sucking each nipple softly at first, his tongue flicking over the sensitive peaks licking in slow, strokes. Then, as his thrusts grew deeper, his mouth became more insistent, lapping and sucking at your breasts as though he couldn’t get enough of you.
The rhythmic sounds of your wetness filled the room, mixing with the slap of his narrow hips between your legs. He groaned loudly, his voice thick with arousal. “Fuck— you feel —so good —I can hardly think” he whispered against your skin, his words broken by heavy breaths.
He thrust harder, his cock twitching inside you with every movement, his satisfaction undeniable. His breaths came in ragged gasps as he pressed deeper, each thrust more forceful, his voice low and guttural. “I can’t… I can’t get enough of you,” he praised, his tone filled with raw need. His hands gripped your hips firmly, pulling you closer the pressure of his cock filling you even more, making you feel completely claimed, entirely his.
Your thighs instinctively squeezed against his hips, and he groaned again, louder this time, his voice unrestrained. “Oh fuck,” he gasped, his pace quickening.
Pulling back slightly, he rested on his elbows, his blue eyes blazing with intensity as he lifted to look between your bodies.
You looked down, your breath catching at the sight of his thick cock disappearing into you, stretching and filling you completely, creating a visible bulge in your abdomen with each deliberate thrust.
The sight alone sent a fresh wave of heat coursing through you, making your thighs tremble as your walls clenched tightly around him. His breaths came harder, his groans breaking as he thrust faster.
“You make me feel so complete,” he whispered, his voice rough and trembling with desire, his gaze locked on yours as if you were the only thing in the world. “I love us… I love this… so much.” His words were filled with reverence, laced with the raw need that fueled every thrust.
His cock twitched inside you again, and you moaned in response, your body arching to meet his as he pressed forward, his lips finding yours once more, capturing every sound of pleasure that escaped you.
You were, unable to speak as your moans overtook you, your body moving in perfect rhythm with his.
The sensation built higher and higher until you both reached your peak, and your orgasm shattered through you leaving you gasping as your vision blurred. You cried out his name, your body tightening and trembling as the intensity consumed you completely.
Feeling your walls tighten around him, he groaned deeply, his hips faltering as his own climax followed. His come spilled into you as he called out your name, his voice rough and trembling with pleasure. The sensation made you cling to him, your arms wrapping tightly around his shoulders as you pulled him down for a deep, heated kiss.
Your tongues tangled desperately, the kiss full of shared intimacy and raw emotion, as your bodies moved together, covered in a light sheen of sweat.
His kisses were slow and heated as his hands traced a path that left you breathless, making you feel cherished in a way you’d never experienced before. As you came down, the sensation was all-consuming, leaving you trembling in his arms.
He held you close, his lips brushing your temple. “You’ve got me,” he whispered, his voice low and steady. “All of me.”
You swallowed hard, your heart pounding in your chest as his words washed over you. “I want all of you,” you whispered back, your voice soft but filled with conviction. “Every piece.”
The weight of your own words settled between you, and for the first time in a long time, you felt something crack open inside you—love. This wasn’t just passion or a fleeting connection; it was something deeper… it was real. His arms around you felt like home, his steady heartbeat against yours like a rhythm you’d been searching for your entire life.
His thumbs caressed your hips as he slowly, carefully pulled out but the sensation left a soft ache, a reminder of how completely he had filled you.
He rested his head against your neck, his breath warm and uneven against your skin, and you instinctively brought your fingers to his hair, holding him close. His chest pressed against yours, grounding you in the intimacy of the moment.
After a few quiet breaths, his voice broke the silence, soft and a little hesitant. “I know you don’t want more kids right now,” he murmured, his lips brushing against your collarbone. “But… do you think you’d ever want more one day?”
You paused, your fingers lightly threading through his hair as you considered his question. A gentle smile tugged at your lips as you answered, “If I were married… then yes, maybe.”
He let out a quiet, thoughtful hum, and instead of responding right away, he nuzzled back into your neck, his lips pressing softly against your skin. “Married,” he murmured, his voice filled with a mixture of affection and quiet contemplation.
He didn’t say anything more, just held you close, his breath warm against your neck, letting the moment speak for itself.
As you closed your eyes a small, contented smile crossed your lips. Austin was the was the start of something real and something you were finally ready to believe in.
Two years later, you stand hand-in-hand with Austin in the cabin, the same one where everything truly began. Lily dances around your feet, giggling as Jack chases her with a toy airplane. Your gaze drifts to your wedding ring, the diamond catching the soft glow of the setting sun filtering through the large windows.
Austin’s hand slides lovingly over your growing belly, his touch gentle but protective, as if cradling the life you are creating together. His blue eyes soften as he looks at you, a small smile playing on his lips.
As the sun dips lower, casting golden hues across the frozen lake, he leans in, his forehead resting against yours for a moment before his lips brush yours in a tender kiss. “Together forever,” he murmurs, his voice low and full of promise.
And forever, with him, feels exactly right
🎄 THE END 💕
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I love your writing am and i always seem to go back to your sally face fic and i would love something similar to that but with sally and i would love to see if you could incorporate substance use (ex. weed) not to a dangerous extent but almost seen as inviting. with ftm reader again! ofcs you can take this request and do what you like with it!! i just love your writing sm and i want to see more sally face content:)
❝ If you think I’m pretty put your hands on me, know I can’t stop thinkin’ ‘bout it ❞
Sal Fisher x ftm!reader | fluffy, NSFW, slight angst | reader has had top-surgery & bottom growth | vers. bttm. reader | NOT PROOFREAD + written on phone | wc: 4K
warnings: recreational use of marijuana, some guilt from Sal because he vowed not to smoke as a child but r! reassures him, Sal mentions painkiller addictions, mentions of hospitals and wounds, mentions of scarring, shotgun kisses, handjobs, fingering, AFAB terminology (clit referred to as dick/cock)
masterlist ; "I was the boy who was on your side"

authors note: I FORGOT TO FILL THIS UHM UHHH IM BACK?
*song on repeat: Romeo by Until The Ribbon Breaks

He's been drumming his fingers across his knees for a full 20 minutes now. A never-ending symphony of thumps occasionally disturbed by pauses of silence as he picked at the ripped edges of his jeans. You suppose you understand the anxiety that was racking through him, despite the reassurances you'd given him, he was bound to have some second thoughts. "Hey, baby," you tap the steering wheel, an elbow propped onto your window sill panel. Despite your eyes being glued on the road, you're acutely aware of his gaze on yours.
"Ya' didn't have to come along if you didn't want to," at your words he shakes his head. "No — Sorry, I didn't mean to come off that way, baby." Sal reaches out and places a hand on your knee, squeezing it just enough to have you decompressing your nerves.
"No, no. I didn't mean to make you feel bad," you clasp his hand and squeeze him back, the road will be fairly emptier now that you've driven past the bridge. "You just look a little nervous is all, I was jokin' 'bout you needing to follow along. I was just teasing you, Sal." "I know. I wanted to spend time with you, (Y/N). Which is why I followed along even though I knew you were just fucking with me," he sighs, allowing the song playing on the radio to filter in the silence for a few seconds. "It's just, buying drugs, makes me a liiittle nervous."
A chuckle escapes you and you risk staring at Sal for a bit. "You've dealt with poltergeists and the like, the baloney incident, and buying a little ganja is making you sweat?"
“Shut up,” he groans as he slips his hand up and lands a muted smack on your thighs. “Poltergeists can land me in a psychiatrist's office, this could land us in jail.”
“At least we’ll be together in a small cell,” you coo and Sal rolls his eye with a scoff. “We’re not gonna get caught, ya’ big baby. I’ve done this a thousand times with Larry, Todd, and Ashley — we’ll be fine. Promise.”
It went more than fine. Underwhelming actually. He had expected a more intense, whispered, exchanges with some weirdly firm handshake while the other dude slipped you the weed. He had even lifted the hood of his hoodie up to make the both of you less identifiable. It was adorable.
Your dealer had come down from their apartment. Sal seeing her brightly coloured pink tie-dye sweatpants from the slat of the stairs, and the cheerful wave she gave you once she took notice of your car.
“Was wondering when you’d text. I got your favourite.”
She’s leaned on your rolled-down windows, discretely holding the pink paper bag of weed in front of her chest and bouncing it around. She extends her other hand first, and Sal is silent as you reach for the cash from the cup holder.
In that pause of conversation, she takes notice of him and recognition is crystal clear.
“O-M-G, is that Sal, the boyfriend?” You chuckle while Sal stutters in surprise. Handing her the cash, she graciously exchanges it with the bag.
“Yeah, he’s following along with me running errands.” “Cute,” she coos. After a few pleasantries, she leans away. That small pink paper bag between your legs barely able to distract your boyfriend from her excited wave of goodbye — that you return obviously.
“You talk about me with her?” you glance at him for a second then laugh. “Dude, most of us get our weed from her. She eventually gets to know the side characters in our lives the longer she interacts with us.”
He scoffs, crossing his arm as he leans back in the seat.
“Side characters? Seriously?” “Duh,” you pick the bag up and shake it in his face teasingly. “Everyone knows the main characters participate in drug culture and the side characters don’t.”
“This is the peer pressure my father warned me about.”
You giggled at his joke as you place the bag between your thighs again. This time, Sal’s eyes follows it.
He’s seen you and Larry smoke before. Hell, most of his friends smoke on the back porch while he’ll be mindlessly cleaning up as he waits for all of you to herd back inside. He’s never felt left out, you guys were simply respecting his wishes is all. He wasn’t much of a fan of drinking or smoking. But he wouldn't stop anyone from doing it, as long as no one got too inebriated.
Though, for some reason, he just can’t take his eyes away from that pink bag.
“Mhm, next thing you know, you’ll look like those anti-bullying posters. All the stoners will point and laugh while you have big ole’ sad cat eyes.”
The imagery makes him laugh softly and he glances at your face as the scenery zooms past beside you.

When you reach home, the house is empty. A note was left on the kitchen fridge by Todd, something about him and his boyfriend going on a date.
Just you, Sal and Gizmo.
It makes his palms clammy and his nerves turning up his sensitivity a few notches.
You greeted Gizmo with a few chin scratches. Settling on the living room couch with crossed legs, you open the bag one handedly while you lean over to the catch-all bowl on the coffee table for the lighter and your MP3 player.
All the while, he stands in the kitchen threshold. Like a kid who knows they’ve done something they’re definitely shouldn’t have done — the guilt was just radiating from him. It made you toss your head to the side when you took notice of him, a joint hung loosely between your lips.
“You good, baby?”
He nods, your words setting him into motion as he sits on the couch.
“I’m not gonna smoke inside,” you reassure with a smile. Why else would he stare at you like that, right?
He nods again. Oddly quiet. Gizmo yawns and sinks further down onto the couch, watching the TV show with an almost human-like concentration. Nobody says anything about it anymore. He’s just a little guy, really.
You lean over, joint plucked out and resting between the second knuckle of your pointer and middle finger this time, and give his cheek a kiss.
“See you in a bit.”
He watches like he always does. There’s nothing to clean. It’d be weirder if he attempted to look busy. So he glances at the TV, then at Gizmo and then at your back as you sit down on the porch. He can hear the muffled sounds of you flicking the lighter, and shortly after he sees the white smoke that slithers upwards into the air along with the sounds of your favourite band quietly playing.
You thought you hadn’t closed the sliding doors properly when you hear the approaching footsteps. Turning your head to check, you’re surprised to spot Sal walk through the doors to move and settle next to you.
You cough out some smoke. Attempting to fan it away with your hand while you reach to put out the joint in the ash tray that Ashley had made. But Sal stops you as he knocks your knees together, his thigh pressing against yours as he peers at you.
“Sal?”
“...Say hypothethically, a side character wants to dip his toes in some drug culture." Your eyes widen considerably at his confession.
“Huh?” you squeak out. Sal sighs, regret creeping up on him as he scratches the back of his head. The smell of the weed doesn’t exactly help either — it was so distinct.
“Wait, no, sorry. I’m just, this isn’t because of peer pressure is it?” You did mini-hops, getting close enough to him for your thighs to press together. Yet you still held the clay ash tray an arms length away, especially as you note the sharp inhale and exhale he'd made.
Sal’s deadpanned expression makes your eyebrows jump.
“This was dumb,” He admits. “No — no, it isn’t. I was just caught off-guard. Are you...curious?”
Sal nods sheepishly. You lean back on the heel of your hand, the other still holding onto the tray, your finger mindlessly keeping the still-lit joint perched between your digit and the rim of the tray. You think for a moment, then huff in amusement.
“Damn, you still manage to surprise me even after all these years.”
“You’re making it sound like we’ve been married for 50 years,” he retorts. “We will be, I’m just practicing these phrases out loud so you don’t get heart failure in the future.”
This time, Sal’s shoulders shake as he laughs. It dies down as he sees you take a drag, and breathe out the plumes of smoke. Not directly at him, but in his general direction. The smell isn’t something he’s used to. Not this close anyways. Usually, it’s just stuck on your clothes but you reach for the bottle of Febreze strategically placed near the sliding doors anyway so it's more muted.
It. . .doesn’t completely suck. The earthiness of it making his shoulders less tense. You watch his reaction closely, the corners of your lips in a gentle curve as he leans back onto his hands.
You take another drag and Sal’s enraptured at the way the end of your joint glows bright orange. He feels almost envious of the way you swallow the smoke, how you harbour it within your mouth before it slips past your lips. You’re looking at him, just basking in the moment for a little longer before you ask him to play your favourite songs.
It was just beginning to get dark, the sky was setting up for its finale of the day and he was enraptured as you explain what shotgun kisses were.
"I have smoked a cigarette before," he says, brows furrowed as he unbuckles his prosthetic. "Yeah, and nearly coughed up both of your lungs. This will be smoother for you, trust me."
"So I just inhale what you exhale?" "Mhm, easy as pie, right?"
His placed his prosthetic next to him, turning his head and immediately seeing your face invading his vision. "Hi," he smiled at your attempt to keep your smile at bay by chewing on your lower lip.
"Hi," he replies, his anxiety lessening at the sight of your confidence and giddiness. You bring the joint to your lips. He can hear the paper burning and sees tendrils of smoke escaping through your lips. Your words echoed in his brain as you lean in further.
“Just breathe it in slowly, baby."
He feels the smoke across his face, your lips pouted as you blow it his way. Sal breathes it in, sucking the smoke in just like you’d demonstrated earlier. He coughs like you said he would. His eye-watering as he moves to sit and you carefully pat his back as he does.
“Shit,” your eyes squish at his flustered expression. His first time trying a cigarette playing briefly through your head. Though this time it wasn’t even half-bad.
“You did great. Didn't burn on the way down if you smoked it yourself, right?” he got what you meant. He was coughing but he didn't feel like the back of his throat got thwacked by a whip of burning paper and tobacco. The ride was smoother, way smoother with your help. “It feels like the smell is stuck onto my teeth." Sal only complains to see you look at him with that fond gaze. You took another drag as he smacks his lips a few times. Your eyes flutter close, sighing in relief, and tossing your head to the side as you feel yourself loosening up.
“Why do you think I always brush my teeth before I kiss you?”
Sal protests softly as you take another hit and you laugh as he leans in.
“Isn’t that too much — “
You breathe out and Sal seems stunned for a moment, so you apologize but he simply leans in further.
“If this'll be my first time getting high, I want it to be with you.”
"Slow down, baby," you bumped your foreheads together, cupping his jaw in your hand. "What's the rush, hm?"
Curiousity was a valid enough reason to start smoking, but your Sal wasn't the kind of guy to jump into these things head first. It wasn't anything special to him, all of your friends smoked and drunk. He wasn't some pre-teen being excited to finally "grow up" and get in with the cool kids.
Hell, even during his 21st birthday, he'd taken his first drink and smoked his cigarette and decided that he didn't enjoy any of them.
Sal sighs, dropping his weight on you. His head balanced between the curve of your neck and shoulder. You simply thread your fingers through his hair, combing out the indents of his buckles and straps from his hair.
"You think I can't take it?"
"Oh, I definitely know you can't."
He protests with an indignant but whiny 'hey' but settles. His arms wrap around your waist and despite the uncomfortable angle of your torso facing him while your legs faced ahead as they rested on the stairs, you stay like that for a bit.
He eventually pulls away and leans back onto his arms again, reaching for his prosthetic though only to fidget with it on his lap.
"...Is it bad I feel bad? Not physically, just...morally?"
Your silence urges him on. So he continues; “Drinking fucking sucks, and cigarettes don’t make sense to me. But weed as a concept always seemed...appealing to me.”
He feels your chin on his shoulder and he subtly breathes in the smoke that teases him as you exhale.
“But?”
“Argh, it’s stupid. But as a kid, in the hospital there weren’t a lot of people that got as messed up as I did. But the ones that were? Christ, babe, they were in so much pain. Even when the wounds were already scars.”
Your brows pinch. You squeeze his hand and he stops toying with feeling the shape of the bolts to instead gently press the pads of his thumb over your nails.
“The doctors scared me with the whole speech. Painkillers being addictive and all that, it made me scared to ask for ‘em even when the skin grafts felt like they were on fucking fire.”
He shuts his eyes and brings your hand to his face, the pressure and warmth across his jaw and cheek making the phantom pains ebb to nothing.
“I made a promise to my younger me that I would never end up like the adults I saw. I just, don’t want to be in constant pain.”
“You aren’t, Sal. And you won’t be.”
You put out the joint, turning his face to you and planting a kiss on his lips. He breathes out a sigh of relief through his nose and you tilt your head to deepen it. When you pull away, you both linger in the afterglow of it for a second.
“I’m here for you, Sal. If you ever stray from the path, I’m here to guide you back, right? You’ve got me and Larry, Lisa and your dad, Ashley, Todd, Gizmo —” his smile widens as you go on about the precious people in his life.
“Thanks,” he kisses you again and you happily reciprocate.
“By the way, you’re right, you should always brush your teeth before you kiss me when you’re done smoking up.”
Sal laughs as you shove him back, watching admiringly while you light the joint up again.
“...Can I have another hit?”
“You just said my breath smells like ass —”
“You’re overreacting!”

By the time the two of you walk back inside, Gizmo’s nose is twitching. You hadn’t taken too much too be completely useless, just to start feeling that buzz and take the edge off. Sal had expected more of a droopy, drowsy, feeling when he entered the house.
He still feels like himself. A little light on his feet, but still himself. You had paced him from his little smoke-sucking sessions — teasing that he just wanted to kiss you which wasn’t entirely untrue. But you always pulled away just as his eyes would flutter. Most likely you getting back at home for saying your breath smelled like weed. Little tease.
You spray your clothes down, then ask Sal if he’d like to chill on the couch. Something in his brain perks up hard enough to make his penis do the same. He feels a bit shameful of it, but then again, everything you do could make him hard.
The other day you’d been wolfing down some cheesy fries with Ashley and somehow it made Sal have to think of baloney to shut his penis down.
Gizmo’s tail flicks knowingly as Sal sits at the end of the couch, which was his cue to set off to the basement instead. When Sal hears the TV turns on from there, he simply decides to never question how dexterous Gizmo's thumbs were.
You're laid out on the couch with your tummy showing and your eyes just a bit hazy. He knows weed affects people differently; why does it make his lust for you feel so thick? Like cloying, thick, honey dripping down from the back of his throat. Fuelling him in an unfamiliar, alien, way. He climbs over you and the half-lidded gaze you look up at him with makes his mouth feel drier than it is.
This lust is new. It’s more languid in it’s desire — akin to a beast stretching its back only to flop down to its side and show its belly. Still undeniably dangerous, yet so inviting with its soft underbelly and demure paws.
You seem to recognize this beast, lips stretching into a toothy grin.
“Need something handsome?”
He narrows his eyes at you. Then, he places a hand on your chest, fingers brushing along your collarbones before it slowy slips downwards.
“...I really wanna finger you.”
He seems to catch himself. Through that haze that makes him caught between wanting to curl up next to you for a nap or fucking you nice and slow, he finds the part of him that remembers embarrassment.
But before it could throw away his new lazy bravado, you surge up to kiss him, moaning the second your lips made contact.
Stoned Sal decides pants are way too annoying very quickly on. He huffs and puffs at the obstacles that are called buttons and zippers. When he finally undoes them, he pulls your jeans below the swell of your ass and brings the heel of his hand to your clothed cock.
The pressure has your teeth brushing over your lips.
“I love your dick,” he murmurs, “it’s just s’fuckin’ pretty.”
You moan airily, wishing he’d pull your pants all the way down but he is just too entraced at the sight of the wet spots he’s seeing. He traces the fold of your cunt and your breath hitches as he presses a finger through. Not enough to be inside of you, but enough to have your dick twitch.
He brings his thumb to rub against it and you groan.
“Let me take my jeans off, Christ, Sal.”
He chuckles, suddenly abandoning your pussy to pin your hips down. “Barely touched you and you already wanna spread your legs f’me?”
You glare at him, feeling your cheeks heat up as you hitch yourself up onto the couch and stubbornly shimmying out of your pants. He simply watches, uncaring of the less-than-delicate display. You toss your jean away and your underwear follows along, piling onto the floor somewhere.
“The weed is making you so chatty, hm?” you don’t get much out of you after that as Sal immediately claims your lips again. He doesn’t even wait for you to lay back down as he brings his hand between your legs.
Not exactly hasty but not taking his time either. He pulls away enough that the spit between your lips break, but you can still feel him groan when he feels the dewdrops of moisture on your cunt; the slick that coats his finger makes him whisper your name.
“So wet,” he marvels. Your legs twitch at his movements. Sliding up and down, pressing in just to make your breath hitch but never fully slipping inside.
Oh fuck.
Stoned Sal likes to tease.
Your dread is shortlived as he descends his kisses to your neck. You groan, clutching onto the back of his shirt as he mottles your neck with unapologetically languid kisses.
You’re whimpering underneath him as he hums and groans. Using his teeth and making hickey after hickey, dark and tender — he’d even brush his teeth along them just to hear you gasp.
Meanwhile, he continues to torture your poor cunt. Bringing his thumb into the fray again as he rubs circles on the tip of your cock. The tip of his fingers spreading your slick around your lips, making it messier and messier.
“Sal, please just fuckin’ finger me already,” you whine out. Turning your head away and arching your back as he sets his eyes on your nipples.
“I’m already — Shit, Sal. I’m already so hard.”
He knows. You don’t have to remind him.
“Don’t make me beg, baby, please.”
Sal bites down on your nipple just as he pushes his finger inside of you. He groans at the feeling of your boypussy clamping down. Fuck, you felt good.
So soft and warm and wet and tight.
He slips another finger in and neither of you are surprised at how eagerly your cunt lets it in.
Sal’s lips pause in their conquest as he looks down between your legs. Fuck, what a sight it was. The happy trail you have that always makes his cock jump in his pants — there it goes again — and that beautiful dick that he always loves choking on to that boypussy that he’s convinced is made for him.
He starts pumping his fingers. In and out in a steady rhythm. Adoring every noise that comes out of you. You take them well, all the way down to the base and when he angles his palm just right your hips buck to grind your cock against his hand.
Fuck, you were perfect.
He kisses you. Breathing through his nose as he bites down on your already swollen lower lip — relishing in this. In you.
He adds another finger and you mewl. It makes him laugh.
You were usually much more headstrong. When he teases, you tease back. The weed is working in his favour, you were so pliant. Melting under him and already close to your first orgasm.
When he curls his fingers, you toss your head back, mouth opening in a silent scream. Your hand dives between your legs to rub your cock and Sal watches your face as you jeek yourself off.
“Just like that, just like that — Oh, oh—ah! Fuck!”
He doesn’t falter his pace, moaning out curses as you clamp down around his fingers.
“Come on, baby. Cum for me, cum for me.”
His voice undoes you.
You buck your hips as wetness covers his hand. He groans, praising you as he continues to pump in and out. You let him, simply curling your toes and panting as you just kept on cumming and cumming.
When he kisses you this time, he doesn’t even let you breathe. Just swallowing your noises as he finger-fucks you through your orgasm and makes you barrel to your second with no breaks.
You clutch at his shirt, feeling lightheaded but unwilling to ask him to stop.
“Keep going, Sal. Please, please.”
How could he say no?
#s3thwrit3sstuff#reader insert#male reader#male reader insert#gay reader#male!reader#sally face#sally face x reader#sally face x male reader#sal fisher#sal fisher x reader#sal fisher x male reader
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𝐄𝐦𝐨 𝐆𝐲𝐮𝐭𝐚𝐫𝐨 𝐇𝐞𝐚𝐝𝐜𝐚𝐧𝐨𝐧𝐬
꒦꒷‧₊ Content Gyutaro x genderneutral!reader, fluff ꒦꒷‧₊ Note A gift for @matsukaah based on a beautiful artwork she did ♡
"Is that Gyutaro Shabana?" You said in disbelief as you saw the familiar boy walking around the mall in heavy emo fashion.
Black nails, eyeliner, ripped skinny jeans, studded belts, and combat boots. He looked like he walked straight out of an early 2000s HotTopic ad.
This isn't how you're used to seeing him. No, at school he's usually dawning the same uniform as everyone else and keeps to himself.
He always seemed so shy and quiet that you never would have imagined this was how he dressed outside of class. Though it makes sense—the prestigious Catholic school would never allow such a thing.
Gyutaro only goes full out like this on long breaks, like summer and winter. Mostly because he'd get annoyed painting his nails every weekend just to have to rub it off before school started on Monday.
God, did he hate that school. He's only going because his stupid stepdad is forcing him to. But if it were up to Gyutaro he wouldn't be in school at all. He much rather start a band with his friends.
Not to mention the constant bullying he goes through. You wouldn't know it because you never hung around him that much, but he gets picked on almost daily. His unconventional appearance and his shy personality make him a prime target for bullies.
Sure, you were nice to him when you'd cross paths but it was never enough to make a significant difference or improve his shitty school experience.
So you could say he's shocked when he sees you approaching him at the mall, waving your hands like you two are friends.
"Uh... hey Y/N," he mumbles when you get close.
"Hey Gyutaro! I like your outfit!" You say with a cheery expression that would annoy him if it was on anyone else's face but yours.
His eyes widen like he can't believe you just complimented him, "Th-thanks... I like your shirt. D-Did you get it at HotTopic?" He asks shyly, not used to having casual conversation with someone as cute as you.
You look down as he points to the anime shirt you're wearing, "Oh, yeah I did. How'd you know?"
"I go there all the time, I've seen it before," he smiles softly and moves a strand of hair out of his face, revealing his red cheeks, "Um... they're actually having their semi-annual sale right now. Maybe... I dunno... we could go check it out together?"
"I'd love to," you blush, surprised that he wants to hang out with you, "Lead the way."
After that day you exchanged numbers and he'd always ask you to go shopping with him. You were the only person besides his sister who knew he was emo, so naturally he loved inviting you out with him so he wouldn't be so lonely.
Despite his intimidating appearance, Gyutaro was a sweet guy. Extremely shy, but super sweet.
He'd be too shy to ask you out on proper dates, only asking you to go shopping with him because he didn't want you to think he was weird or to know that he was crushing on you. But to his dismay, Ume told you exactly how her brother felt about you.
Because the first time you came over to their house she said, "Brother won't shut up about you! It's Y/N this and Y/N that! I think he's obsessed with you. Can you guys just kiss or whatever so he'll stop talking about you all the time? It's like getting annoying."
Gyutaro's face turned red with embarrassment and he ran to his room. He can't believe his sister outed him like that in front of his crush! It's taking all of his willpower to hold back his tears. The only thing stopping them from flowing is knowing that it'll ruin his eyeliner if he cries.
"Hey Gyu... can I come in?" you say as you softly knock on his door. You don't get a response so you enter the room anyways to find him sitting on his bed with his hands covering his face.
He can't bear to look at you as he feels you sit beside him, the embarrassment he feels is overwhelming.
Gently wrapping your hands around his wrists, you move his hands away from his face and stare into his watery blue eyes. The amount of shame and fear in his gaze makes your heart ache.
So in a swift movement, you lean forward and kiss his chapped lips. His eyes widen but he doesn't pull away, instead leaning into your embrace as your acceptance feels too good to ignore.
Once you pull away you smile and move his long hair away from his face, "If I knew you liked me as much as I liked you I would have done that a long time ago."
And that's how your relationship with the shy emo boy began.
#gyutaro#gyutaro shabana#gyutaro x reader#gyutaro x y/n#gyuutarou#gyuutarou x reader#demon slayer x reader#kny x reader
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High p1- Pope Heyward



You had always been the quieter one in the group. You and Pope, two of the most withdrawn people. He had always kept his distance, and you, being the new person, didn’t know just how much you could really connect with everyone yet. You didn’t smoke or drink much—just a little here and there, but nothing too crazy. Pope was the same. You both had your own quiet worlds, separate from the noise of the party.
Kiara, the girl who seemed to light up the whole group, had always been the one Pope adored. You could tell, even if he never said it out loud. But something had shifted in him recently, something you couldn’t quite figure out. He didn’t look at her the same way anymore. It was like there was some invisible wall between them, and neither of them could break it down.
One evening, everyone gathered around the usual bonfire. It was dark, the flames crackling, and the air was filled with the familiar hum of laughter and conversation. But Pope wasn’t there. He hadn’t shown up. You were left to the sidelines, unsure if you should be a part of the chaos or just remain a quiet observer.
JJ, always the one to get people involved, noticed you sitting alone and, with a mischievous grin, offered you some weed. Normally, you would’ve turned him down, but that night was different. Maybe it was the loneliness, maybe it was the pressure of fitting in. You didn’t even think twice before you agreed. The moment it hit you, everything felt different. The laughter around you was louder, everything seemed funnier, and the world took on a hazy glow. You were completely high, acting silly and laughing at things that made no sense at all. You felt light, free, and for the first time, you weren’t holding back.
Then, like a ghost out of the past, Pope showed up late. He had his usual look of calm composure, his hoodie and jeans, like he didn’t care about the chaos around him. But when he saw you, something flickered in his eyes. His gaze shifted from the group to you, and the shock was visible on his face. You were completely out of it, giggling uncontrollably at something someone had said, completely unaware of how absurd you must have looked.
Pope didn’t say anything at first. He just walked over to you, as if nothing was out of the ordinary. You, still caught in the high, gave him a goofy grin.
“Didn’t think you were the type to join in on this kind of fun,” Pope said, his voice dry but not unkind. There was a hint of mockery in it, but it was warm, almost teasing, like he was trying to gauge if you were still the same person he thought he knew. “Didn’t expect you to be the party animal.”
You snickered, barely able to form a coherent sentence. "I… I didn’t expect it either… but… it’s not so bad," you managed, your voice a little too high-pitched as you laughed.
Pope chuckled softly, shaking his head, but there was a flicker of something else behind his eyes. Maybe it was amusement, or maybe a touch of sadness—something you couldn’t quite read.
You smiled amusedly as you twirled around while showing off your little white dress. Pope's eyes followed your every movement, watching as you twirled around in your little white dress. He had to admit, it looked great on you, and he was struck once again by how different you were when you were like this—giggly, carefree, so unlike your usual quiet, reserved self.Pope felt a pang in his heart, a sudden realization of just how much he loved your laugh, the way you seemed blissfully carefree. He found himself wondering just how often he *got* to see you like this.
You giggle, stopping by touching your head because it was spinning. "Pope, it's beautiful, it turns everything around" you say amused.
Pope watched as you stopped giggling for a moment, touched your head as if you were dizzy. Pope couldn't help but chuckles a little as he said, "Well, that's what weed does to you, it makes the world look a lot prettier."He took a step closer to you and leaned against a tree, his eyes still locked on you. "You're having a lot of fun, huh?" he asked, a small smile playing at the corners of his lips.
You lean into him, laughing and resting your head on his chest. You were so short compared to him. Pope's eyes widened when you leaned into him, resting your head on his chest. The sudden closeness caught him off guard, but he found himself quite enjoying it. He wrapped an arm around your waist, his hand resting against the small of your back, just holding you there."You're awfully giggly tonight," he said, his voice a little lower, his tone a little softer. "Can you even walk straight?"
Smile amused. “No I don’t think so” you murmur into his chest. Pope chuckled, feeling your words against his chest. You were so honest, so open when you were high. It was almost endearing. He kept his arm firmly around you, supporting your weight as if you were going to fall over at any moment.“Well, that’s not good,” he teased. “How am I supposed to get you home in this state?”
You look at him with your cute little doe eyes. "I don't want to go home, I want to have fun" you say placing your hands on his shoulders. Pope looked down at you, his expression a mixture of amusement and affection. Your cute little doe eyes were looking up at him with a pleading expression, and he was struggling to resist the urge to give in to whatever you wanted."You’re going to regret this tomorrow, you know" he said, his voice a mix of warning and humor. "But fine, let’s have fun… within reason."
You smile sweetly and hug him. “Thank you, thank you,” you say enthusiastically. Pope let out a sigh, pretending to be exasperated, but in truth, he was finding it all quite endearing. You were all over the place, and he couldn’t help but enjoy every second of it.
“You’re welcome,” he said, returning your hug and giving you a small smile. “But no more weed for you, okay?”You giggle in amusement in his embrace. “We’ll see,” you hum and try to drag him to the lounge chair.
Pope couldn’t help but chuckle at your determination despite your current state. He let you drag him by the hand towards the lounge chair, his mind a mix of worry and amusement.“Hey, take it easy,” he cautioned, sitting down on the lounge chair and pulling you to sit on his lap.
You smile and lean into him putting your arms around his shoulders as you look up at the stars. Pope's heart skipped a beat as you leaned into him, your arms wrapping around his shoulders. He could feel your warmth against his chest, and he instinctively placed an arm around your waist to stabilize you.
Pope followed your gaze upwards, looking at the stars that were twinkling in the night sky. He couldn't help but smile at your fascination, your face glowing under the starlight."You really like the stars, don't you?" he asked, his voice a soft murmur against your ear.
You turn and look at him and nod, smiling softly. "Yes". Pope was caught off guard by the sudden shift in your attention, your smile and the look in your eyes. In that moment, he forgot all the reasons he was trying to keep his distance, all the reasons he was trying not to get too close.
He found himself looking at you, his gaze roaming over your face as if he was seeing you for the first time. In the soft light of the stars, you looked softer, more vulnerable—yet undeniably lovely.“You’re beautiful,” he murmured, the words slipping out before he could stop them.
You smile softly while blushing. "Thanks, you too" Pope's heart skipped a beat, his mind trying to process what had just happened. Did you just call him beautiful? He was caught off guard, a mixture of surprise and disbelief on his face.
He was used to being the one to express admiration, to give compliments, not receive them. But there was something about your sincerity, your gentle voice as you said the words, that made him feel fluttery, as if his heart was in his throat.“You really mean that?” Pope asked, his voice a little hoarse.
You nod, smiling softly and hugging him. Pope felt a warmth spread through him as you nodded and hugged him. He held you close, his arms wrapping around you in a protective yet tender embrace.“You really are something else,” he said, the words coming out a little gruff as he tried to keep his emotions in check. Pope could feel your heart beating against his chest, and he realized how much he liked having you like this, close, vulnerable, in his arms.
They sat like this for a moment, your head resting against his chest, his arms wrapped around you. The sounds of the party around them faded into background noise as they were lost in their own little world.Pope took a deep breath, the scent of your hair filling his nostrils, the feeling of your body against his strangely comfortable. He found himself looking down at you, his eyes tracing your features.“You know, I’ve never seen you like this before,” he said quietly, a smile playing at the corners of his lips.
You look up at him with those big doe eyes, your expression a mix of innocence and vulnerability. In that moment, you were the complete opposite of the quiet persona he knew. You were open, carefree, uninhibited—and it was utterly captivating.Pope found himself struggling to keep his thoughts straight. He had to remind himself that you were high, that you weren’t your usual self. But it was impossible to ignore the way his heart was pounding in his chest, the way his body ached to pull you closer.
He cleared his throat, trying to compose himself, but the words that came out were a little huskier than intended.“You’re so…” he trailed off, struggling to find the right word to describe how you were making him feel in this moment. “Free.”
You smile softly at his words and look at his lips. Pope felt a tingle go through his body as he noticed your gaze drifting to his lips. For a moment, he forgot how to breathe, his heart rate increasing at the unspoken implication.He swallowed hard, his eyes darting to your face, his own gaze lingering on your lips. The idea of closing the gap between them suddenly seemed incredibly appealing, but he forced himself to resist. You were high, he reminded himself. He couldn’t take advantage of you in this state.
“Don’t look at me like that,” he said quietly, his voice a little strangled.No matter how much he was struggling to keep his composure, there was no denying the desire that was building within him. The way you were looking at him, the way that your body was pressed against his, it was driving him wild.
"Why not?" You whisper softly. Pope felt his resolve crumbling, your soft whisper and the way you were looking at him stirring something within him that he couldn’t ignore. He wanted—no, needed—to touch you, to pull you even closer than you already were.
He swallowed, his throat becoming dry. “You know why,” he said, his voice low and rough. “You’re high. I can’t… I shouldn’t—”
You silence him by kissing him softly.
Continue…
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Rick Grimes Junior Chronicles
Fishing, Camping, and Lamaze class.
“ Junior pull!” Rick yells, holding the fishing pole, along with his son; both of them pulling against the force that guarantees a feast for tonight. Junior is on break from school, and Rick aligned his time off with Junior’s days off, so it was no better time to have a fishing and camping trip. They are about 20 miles outside of the Commonwealth, a spot he and Michonne found when they decided to go on a run a month ago. Just the two of them, reliving the old times when they had to go on runs, and did not have the ample resources that they now have. Even now, this fishing trip is a bonding experience for the Ricks, but deep down, Rick wants Junior exposed to the rawness of the world, teaching him to make it on his own, and not becoming desensitised to ease and privilege. If you teach a man to fish…
This entire trip has been amazing and refreshing for The Ricks. They've spent two days out here in the wilderness, just the two of them - The Ricks. They set their camp out near the lake, Rick teaching Junior survival tips and tricks, reminding him of how he used to do this with Carl. And when the sun went down, Junior climbed into his father’s sleeping bag, wanting to be as close to his favorite person as he could be. Rick fell asleep with a smile on his face, cuddling the best gift he and Michonne gave to each other.
“ Dad!” Junior yells, holding the fishing pole as hard as his little seven years old hands allow. A minute feels like forever, when you're trying to catch your first fish, but the line snaps, the fish escapes, and Junior tumbles into the dirt, disappointed.
“ Hey buddy, there's always next time,” Ricks says, smiling at the way Junior frowns and pouts, looking exactly like his mother whenever she doesn't get her way. He sees this frown whenever he uses up all the hot water in the shower, or when Junior prefers his dad to tuck him in at night. He remembers one time, at 3 AM, they heard Junior screaming in the middle of the night. Nightmares of losing his dad, taunting him in his sleep. Michonne screamed that she was on her way, and the boy replied, “ I want daddy.” The frown she had then is the frown her son has now, and as much as Rick loves that the boy is 95% Rick Grimes, he cherishes the 5% that is Michonne Grimes.
“ Dad, I almost had it.”
“ I know, but sometimes, you lose some,” Rick says, squatting to his son’s level, wiping the dirt from his little boy's face. Rick stares at his boy, truly baffled at how Michonne’s genetics didn't even try.
“ I wanted to give mama a fish,” he pouts, looking down at his dusty jeans. Ever since Junior met his dad, he undertook a new wardrobe. He only wears blue and black jeans, cowboy boots, and whatever color or form of shirt his dad is wearing. Right now, Junior is in a brown shirt and so is Rick.
“ How about we try again?” Rick laughs, adjusting the boy's hat, and Junior smiles, headed to grab his dad’s fishing pole when the walkie talkie makes noise.
“ Daito to The Brave Man,” it sputters, and The Ricks dive toward the walkie, eager to hear the center of both of their universes.
“ Mom,” Junior says, grasping the walkie, and a stern look from his dad reminds him to use code names.
“ It's Little Brave Man,” Junior says, sitting on his dad’s lap who sits on the foldable chair.
“ Hi baby. How is the trip,” she asks, and Rick can detect the smile in her voice.
“ It’s good. Dad and I are having so much fun! Dad taught me how to make knots, traps, and how to hunt. I almost caught my first fish but dad says we’re going to try again. Dad let me tell ghost stories last night,” he says knowing his mom wouldn't allow it, and the finger placed to Rick's lips reminds Junior that it was supposed to be their little secret.
“ Did you have nightmares?” she ask softly.
“ No!” Junior quickly defends, and Rick stifles the laugh because though he knows his son is obsessed with him, he knows part of the reason he felt a little body squeezing in his already small sleeping bag, was because the scary wind outside of their tent reminded him of the scary wind that was talked about in the third ghost story.
After a few minutes of catching up, Michonne asks to speak to Rick in a way that means she just needs it to be her and Rick, so Rick sends Junior off to repair his fishing line. Rick settles into his foldable chair, imagining how she looks today. A month ago, she signed up for lamaze class with the CommonWealth’s best Midwife, Mrs. Tyler. Rick would be with her now, but it's hosted by the Midwife Legend, who is a much older and traditional Southern woman who does not let men attend. She is so old fashioned, she doesn't allow men in the labour and delivery room; suffice to say, she won't be delivering Rick and Michonne’s baby girl, but she was good at what she does, so Michonne decided to take her class. Rick listens to her lament on how strict Mrs. Tyler is, holding his laughter in.
“ Why are you whispering?” he ask.
“ Because I am hiding in the bathroom,” she says urgently and Rick can't help but release the laughter he’s been holding in, at the thought of his fearless wife, hiding in the bathroom from an 89 year old Southern sweet old lady. She pushed him out of a helicopter, blew up the CRM, gave birth to their baby all alone, and yet this old woman is scaring her. Rick's joy attracts attention, a walker coming into view, snarling toward them.
“ Hold on, Michonne,” he says resolutely, exchanging the walkie down for his gun, when Junior grabs his little hatchet from his belt buckle.
“Junior, wait!” Rick yells, thankful Michonne can't hear the commotion of what's going on. Suddenly his heart stops, and his body is transported back into a realm where his oldest son lay defeated by a walker bite. It's like a movie that plays before Rick's eyes, as he watches his son knock the walker to its feet, before puncturing it in the brain. He should be happy. He knows he should. His son knows how to defend himself and survive. But his son’s independence reminds him of what he missed. Rick wanted to be there to teach him to walk, to hear him babble and boast to Michonne that Junior said dada before he said mama. Rick knows that he’s guilty for babying his son, but that's his son whose life he missed out on. That's his baby and if he wants to baby him, he can. But the boy standing over the walker, wiping blood off of his arm reminds him that he is growing up right before Rick's eyes.
Suddenly, Rick remembers the walkie and knows that Michonne will worry if he doesn't return fast, so he gestures for Junior to come back to his fishing line, noticing how the boy avoids his gaze the whole time. Rick returns to his foldable chair, taking a deep breath to level his heart rate, retaining a demeanor that wont alarm his already troubled and annoyed wife.
“ Hey baby, I’m back.”
“ Is everything okay? RJ?”
“ Junior’s fine, now tell me about Mrs. Tyler,” Rick says, eager to change the subject.
“ What happened?” Michonne says, not letting this go.
“ It was a walker. It was far away and in the distance - I killed it,” Ricks face is sour, hating lying to his wife. And after a few more seconds of assuaging her worry, they return back to Michonne’s day of drinking slimy and disgusting drinks because Mrs.Tyler swears it’ll give her a healthy pregnancy.
“ Honey, I'm coming to get you,” Rick says, starting to rise.
“ No! I can handle this myself.”
“ You don't have to handle this yourself, honey-”
“ I know, but even though I feel like a teenager with a strict parent, she has been very helpful. I’ve learned alot from her so maybe it's best that I stay. Besides, I'm afraid of what she might do when she sees you rescuing me. Oh shit. She’s onto me. I gotta go. Tell Junior to be good. Love you, bye,” Michonne says quickly, her voice exiting the walkie. Rick holds it dearly to his chest, pondering his next steps. He needs to talk to Junior, he knows he does. A rain droplet falls on his arm, and he looks up and sees dark clouds forming. He grew up on a farm and can predict the weather better than any meteorologist.
“ Junior, let's go and rescue your mama.”
It's night time when The Ricks arrive at the east end of the Commonwealth. The drive from the campground was quiet, and not just because Junior fell asleep in the backseat, but because Rick had to focus. A storm was brewing, one that meant power outages, and stocking up on food from the pantry.
Now, The Ricks stand outside on the porch, waiting for Mrs.Tyler to open her door, so that they could rescue Michonne. Eventually, it slowly opens, revealing a very pregnant Michonne who is shocked to see her boys.
“ What are you doing here?” she excitedly whispers, going for Junior first, kissing his forehead, and hugging him tightly.
“ She’s gonna kill you,” she smiles into Rick's kiss, cradling his bearded cheek, and holding Junior’s frame with her other hand.
“ I’m not scared of Mrs.Tyler,” Rick says, his hand sliding down Michonne’s back.
“ Rick, you're not fighting Mrs.Tyler. She’s an old lady. Besides, I don't think you would survive.”
There they stand, Michonne holding her little boy who has an expression on his face that she'll investigate later, as Rick holds them both. They jump, startled, when Mrs.Tyler calls Michonnes names from inside of the house.
“ You better go,” Michonne says, pushing The Ricks down the steps.
“ Honey-”
“ I’m serious, she’s going to kill you if she -”
“ Mrs. Grimes, who are these people?” An older lady appears in the doorway, and Rick sizes her up, wondering how Michonne has been scared of her.
“ Uh - this is my son, Mrs. Tyler. Rick Junior, my baby that I was telling you about. And this is Rick, my husband,” Michonne says, standing in front of them.
“ Well, what are y’all standing out here for, you’ll catch a cold,” she says, making them follow her inside, as Michonne rolls her eyes, holding Junior’s hand.
It's an old farmhouse, reminding Rick of his grandma’s house when he was little. He loved visiting his grandparents as a child, him and his brother Jeff, playing practical jokes on his grandma who could give it as much as she could take it. His feisty old grandma is where he learned how to predict the weather and curse like a sailor. Suddenly the 89 year old woman feels like home, reminding Rick of people, family who he has not had the pleasure of thinking about since The Turn. He decides that he has no reason to be afraid of this country lady who looks like his childhood memories, understanding why his city wife finds her to be intimidating.
“ You know, you ought to dust in here,” Rick says mischievously, teasing the older woman, and suddenly he feels Michonne's elbow jabbing him.
“ You know, you ought to have named your son anything but Junior. Very unoriginal. Sounds like the boy comes from a couple of narcissists,” she says, leading them into the living room, and Rick laughs, falling in love with this lady, more and more.
“ Here you go,” Mrs.Tyler says, aggressively handing Rick two large blankets.
“ What is this for?”
“ you're staying here,” She says resolutely, slowly walking to pull pillows from a dresser.
“ Oh that's not necessary-,” Michonne starts.
“ It is storming out there.”
“ Oh it's just a little rain, we’ll be fine.”
“ You weren't born in the country, girl. That is more than a little rain, and if you don't want your little boy flying away in the wind, I suggest you get comfortable. You in there, and you two in there,” she says confidently, pointing to two different rooms for them to sleep in.
“ Uh- I’d like to stay with my Wife,” Rick over exaggerates the fact that Michonne is his wife, understanding people like Mrs. Tyler. His mother was the same way. In the South, Boyfriends and Girlfriends don't sleep in the same rooms. Not even if they were your fiance. Only spouses could.
“ Well, you and your WIFE,” she replies sarcastically, taking note of the emphasis Rick put on Michonne being married to him.
“-won't die if you sleep separated for one night. You made this little boy and have another one on the way. By the looks of it, you two could use a break from each other. Men in different rooms. Your boy is free to go to whichever parent he wants to," Mrs. Tyler says, her tone insinuating that there will be no negotiating. She disappears into the hallway giving them privacy, as Rick swallows his annoyance.
“ I see what you mean, Michonne. She is scary,” he says loud enough for Mrs. Tyler to hear down the hall.
“ But I want to sleep with both of you,” his son says, bringing him back to the situation. Michonne steps up, kissing her boy goodnight, already knowing that he can't sleep with both of them, and if given the opportunity to choose, he’ll always choose his dad.
“ You listen to daddy, you hear me?” she says, kneeling to her son's height, and he nods his head softly, falling into her embrace. She kisses his cheek, his forehead, his nose, all over his face- a kiss attack- the way she would do when he was a newborn, when he had chunky cheeks. Back then he would laugh heartily, that deep baby laugh that gave a person baby fever. Now, he grimaces, pretending to be disgusted.
“ Mom,” he whines, wiping her kisses away, and trying but failing to wipe the smile away too.
“ ‘Mom’” she mocks, rising to wrap her arms around her husband, intimately pressing her bosom into his chest. He secures his arms around her waist, kissing her deeply, inhaling her breath. He hasn't slept with his wife in two days, and now he has to go another day.
“ Dad. Mom.You're being gross-” Junior whines, holding the blankets, and Michonne pulls away from Rick, wiping at his mouth, not releasing him yet.
“ I love you,” she says, staring deeply into his eyes.
“ I love you,” he says in his soft bedroom voice, only reserved for her, going back to softly pecking her lips, when he remembers the bump between them. He takes a step back, kissing her growing belly, before grabbing Junior and walking into their room for the night.
Now, Rick ponders the events of the day as he watches the dirt fall from his body into the shower drain. The warm water sedates him, feeling relaxed after his heart almost fell out of his chest today when Junior handled that walker. He formulates his thoughts and words, knowing that once he’s out of the shower, he’ll have to talk to Junior. He makes quick work of drying himself, and lotioning his skin with some sandalwood cream he’ll steal for himself when Mrs. Tyler isn't looking. After putting on some large pajamas Mrs. Tyler lended him, he calls Junior into the bathroom to brush his teeth, noticing the boy's hair.
“ Junior, when was the last time you washed your hair?” Rick asks, seeing a build up of dirt trapped in his locks, no doubt from their camping and fishing trip. Junior spits out the toothpaste, and pauses his brushing to answer his dad.
“ uh mama washed it last week.” he says, returning to cleaning his teeth. It's amazing what children get from their parents. Junior has gone his whole life never knowing his father, and yet he couldn't escape being Rick if he tried. Yet there are tiny moments that remind him that Michonne contributed to their baby- like the boy’s love for dental hygiene. Rick laughs to himself, thinking about how Michonne’s dental hygiene is the story of their love. The beginning of their story. Michonne’s dental hygiene and what followed after Rick wanting to satisfy her is the origin of Junior’s life. Rick owes that toothpaste his life.
Rick comes to kiss his son’s forehead.
“ When you're done with that, I'm gonna wash your hair-”
“ Daddy-”
“ No arguments, Junior. You’ve got dirt from the trip still in your hair.”
So now Rick stands above the sink, standing over a Junior who lays on the counter, his head dipped into the sink. He never thought to wash hair this way, but he saw Michonne do it, and now it's how they clean the boys hair. Rick lathers the shampoo he just finished using in his own shower into the boy’s locks, washing the dirt away, and shampooing the boy's scalp. He laughs to himself, purposely flicking a little bit of water on the boy's face, Junior animatedly calling his dad, trying to pretend he isn't having a good time. Trying to pretend he hates it when his dad shampoos his hair.
Eventually Rick finishes, and now sits on the closed toilet, Junior standing between his legs, moisturizing the boy's curls. Junior keeps his eyes closed, enjoying the massage, when a look of perplexion returns to the boy's face.
“ What is it?” Rick asks.
“ I know you’re mad at me - for getting that walker,” Junior says, and Rick stops his movements. He looks at him long and hard. Junior stands, a towel wrapped around his shoulders, in a shirt that is so big, it almost goes to his ankle, clothes that belong to Mrs. Tyler’s dead husband, Ricks presumes.
“ I’m not mad at you, son,” Rick says softly, gesturing for Junior to help him close the cap on the bottle; his one hand another thing that brings them closer together. Rick is independent, and capable of handling life on his own, but he can't help but notice the way Junior loves to help him button his shirt, or open bottles, or put on his boots. Rick has gone his whole life being tolerated, only to go half on a kid who thinks he hung the moon.
“ You're not mad?” the boy looks into his fathers eyes, relief washing over him,
“ No, son.” Rick says, a soft smile forming on his lips.
“ So, why did you panic?”
“ You’re my son, I am always going to panic.”
“ But I wasn't in danger, daddy. I had it-”
“ That doesn't matter, son. For the rest of my life, you will always be on my mind. Whether I am asleep or awake. When your mama told me about you for the first time, you were on my mind, and every action I did after that was for your safety.”
“ But dad-”
“ No buts, Junior. One day, when you grow up to be a man, and if you decide that you want to be a father, you will see what I am talking about. You never stop worrying about your kid. Besides, you’re too young to be handling walkers-”
“ No I’m not, dad.”
“ Junior-”
“ No, I'm not dad!” he practically yells, startling rick. And if this were any other situation, Rick would be stern with him for raising his voice, but something is on the boy's mind.
“ You know. When I was in class, back in Alexandria- they would talk about people who changed history. People who changed the world. You were always at the top of that list. And when I realized that the hero in my history books was my father, that I was his son and I was named after him- I knew that I had something to live up to - big shoes to fill.”
“ Junior, you have no shoes to fill. I am a character to them, but to you, I am your dad-”
“ You’re both! You're the man who pours the milk in my cereal every morning, who goes on school field trips with me, and lets me eat the last waffle. But you're also the man who led Alexandria to safety against the Saviors. You blew up the bridge to save everyone. You chopped off your hand because you couldn't bear not seeing mama in your dreams anymore. You changed the world. You are my hero. And I want to be just like you,” Junior says, his voice cracking, a tear rolling down his face, and Rick’s heart shatters into pieces. He pulls the boy into his embrace, enjoying the feeling of Junior's Face snuggling in the nape of his neck, imagining what that would have felt like when Junior was a baby. He would've loved to play fight with 2 year old Junior. He would've loved feeding Junior bottles at 2 am, while Michonne caught up on rest. He would've loved blowing bubbles in his belly, and wiping his nose during the colder months, and finding matching swimming trunks during the warmer ones.
“ Buddy, you don't have to put yourself in danger to be like me. You are me.”
“ I wasn't in danger, though dad. I knew you were behind me, and if I needed help, all I would have to do is call you,” he says, leaning into his dad’s chest, and suddenly it hits rick. He and Michonne created a child who is half a person who took down the CRM and half a person who ripped someone's throat out. Junior never stood a chance at being a normal and a regular kid. Rick doesn't want to go down the spiral that makes him ponder all the years of the boy's life he missed but he can't help it. The truth is, Junior did have that walker- but oh how he wishes he didn't. How he wishes Junior called him instead, needing him like a two year old would. But Junior isn't two. He is seven and half of two insane people which automatically makes him more progressed than most. Rick can't turn back the clock- Junior will never be a baby again, but his Junior, his baby boy, is here, in the flesh, and from the moment he’s met his boy- he gets to raise him. Rick will do that, he'll teach him how to fight, and how to go on runs, and how to be a leader for the future… he’ll do these things so that he gets to be the person who pours the cereal, and goes on field trips, and makes forts in the living room.
Junior pulls back, with tear stains on his face.
“ I love you dad. You're the best gift that I have ever received,” he says confidently, as if nothing truer were ever uttered. And Rick swallows the lump in his throat, staring into the creation that exists because Michonne made loving her so easy to do.
“ And you’re my best gift, Junior,” Rick says, and he tickles the boy's sides, inviting levity into the moment. They return to the boy's hair, then the boy's skin, Rick lotioning him when he notices how dry the boy's skin is. Junior starts talking about his favorite character in “Invincible.” Comics used to be Michonne and Carl's thing. But the way Junior talks about it, makes Rick vow to read every comic he can get his hand on, so that he can connect to his boy on yet another level. Suddenly, a thought pops into Rick's head.
“ I have an idea.”
Down the hall, Michonne lays restless in her bed, massaging her growing bump, thinking of all the fun The Ricks are having. It's funny. Junior was never a mama’s boy. When he was a toddler, his first words were dada. All he’s ever done was talk about his dad, even when he hadn't even met him yet. It’s like she destined him to be like and obsess over his father, the moment she looked at Rosita almost 8 years ago, confirming the name of her and Rick’s baby. A smile forms on her face, when she realises how happy she is that she was able to gift Rick someone who makes him so happy- someone who he wanted so much.
Suddenly, Michonne jumps, when she hears a noise, instinctively grabbing whatever threatening object next to her. She holds the lamp in her hand like she would her katana, staring at the darkness of her room when her heart almost falls out of her chest. It's her boys, sneaking into her room, both plastering mischievous grins on their faces, and by the looks of it, she knows that it was her husband's idea, and Junior was just eager to be a part of whatever plan his father concocted. Junior is on Rick’s back, whispering, SURPRISE!
“ Rick,” she whispers shocked, as Junior jumps on the bed, excited to be sharing a bed with his parents.
Rick instinctively grabs his wife, kissing her as much as he wants, free to do so, now that Junior is distracted by how comfortable the sheets are.
“ You’re gonna get me in so much trouble,” Michonne whispers in rick's mouth, as he tilts his head, consuming her lips.
“ Just wait until we get back home. You’re really gonna be in trouble then,” he whispers seductively, squeezing her bottom in his hand.
“ You promise?” she whispers passionately and bites his lip. She entertains Rick for a few more seconds, playing with the hair on his chest as he kisses her neck. Eventually she pulls away, knowing where this is headed.
Michonne grabs her boy, smelling his lavender shampooed hair, praising Rick for scratching one thing off her todo list. They whisper, speaking in hushed tones, updating Michonne of their camping trip, Rick Grimes Junior in between both of his parents, their bodies facing their boy and their hands interlocked. Junior makes a joke, and they have to hold their hands to their mouths, both of them, reaching over to kiss the boy's cheeks, just like they would have if he was a newborn, and they were new parents to the gift that they gave each other.
Now, Junior sleeps on top of Rick, Rick's back sitting up and leaning on the bed frame, with Michonne laying in the space of his open arm. She rest her head on his shoulder, playing in Juniors curls, as he softly snores.
“ I know something happened, Rick. When there was a pause on the walkie. It's fine. You both are safe and that's all that matters.”
Rick nods, gently caressing Junior’s back, deciding to tell his wife the truth.
“ He took his first walker,” he says and Michonne’s eyes buck because she doesn't know whether to be happy or sad.
“ He’s too young to be-”
“ I know. It's exactly what I thought. But after he took his bath, I washed his hair. We talked. He’s half of you and half of me, baby. Two insane people, he never stood a chance,” Ricks says, and Michonne eventually agrees, nodding and understanding that everything Rick is saying is true. It's the same for the baby growing inside of her. It’ll be a few more years before Junior becomes a weapon, and a machine. But if Michonne had anything to do with it, those years would have to wait.
“ I know what you're thinking,” Rick says.
“ Yeah?” she looks up into his eyes, kissing his shoulder.
“ He's our baby. Our baby that we were supposed to raise together, the fact that you were alone, pregnant all those years angers me so much Michonne. Those people who we survived with- our own fucking family, turned away from you and I wasnt there to help. They owed you so much.”
“ I know baby,” she says softly, caressing his beard and looking at his lips. She knows how angry it makes Rick that all she had to help her in her most difficult time was Daryl and Rosita. A Lot makes him angry, but they can't go back, so she softly pecks his lips three times, shushing him when she sees how he wants to continue down that dark path.
“ The fact that we couldn't experience his early life together-but I have to find peace in the fact that we get to raise him at 7 and not 14 or even 18. Imagine, if it took that long for you to find me. I have to find peace in the fact that he still is shorter than my shoulders, and crawls in my tent when he is scared, and that he thinks I’m cool and still wants to sleep with mom and dad. He‘s got Michonne and Rick in him. He can't help but be insane. But for the moments that remind me he's just a little boy, I will cherish them forever. Jadis took years away from us. Let's not let her take anymore.”
And Michonne nods, helping Rick to lay back in a way that wont wake up their future heir. He startles a bit, a chain of saliva dripping from the corners of his mouth. Michonne wipes it away, laying his head more comfortably on his fathers chest. She kisses her boy's forehead before kissing Rick one more time, and resting on his shoulder.
“ Goodnght, Rick.”
“ Goodnight, baby.”
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Yours, Always | Part Twenty-Three
Bucky x reader AU
Word Count: 6k
Warnings: None
A/N: Yall, been way too long but I've been busy moving I moved now but I've been busy unpacking and dealing with life and trying to make time for riding but I'm so tired at the end of the day and it's hard because I really wanna keep writing because my passion but yknow i'm just exhausted.
Were gonna be getting somewhere soon with this fic and wrapping up the story and maybe a little bit of spice 👀✨
Masterpost
----
The room feels unusually warm as the sunlight pours through the open window, casting long, slanted shadows across the wooden floor. You sit on the edge of the couch, your fingers anxiously tracing the fabric of your jeans. The quiet tick of the wall clock feels deafening in the stillness of the room.
Steve sits across from you, the weight of the years between you palpable in the way his shoulders tense under the weight of unspoken words. The last few months have been a blur of decision-making, a whirlwind of heartache and reflection. Now, sitting here in the house, you can feel the finality of everything that’s been building up.
Steve’s lawyer, a middle-aged woman with dark glasses and a stern expression, flips through a stack of papers on the coffee table. The air between you and Steve feels heavier than the formalities of divorce, each glance, each movement carrying a history, a shared life that no piece of paper could ever truly capture.
“I’ve spoken to my lawyer,” Steve says quietly, his voice breaking through the silence. “About the house, I mean, it’s yours if you want it.”
You look at him, the memory of every fight, every tear shared in that house echoing in your chest. Your heart aches at the thought of it, but you try to hold your ground.
“I don’t want it,” you reply softly, your voice steady despite the war raging inside you.
Steve’s eyes flicker with a mixture of regret and understanding, but he doesn’t push. “Should we sell it?” he asks, his voice quieter now. The question hangs in the air, heavy with years of memories.
“Where are you going to live?” you ask, your gaze drifting to the window, avoiding his eyes for fear of seeing too much of the man you once loved.
“I was thinking Boston,” he says, and the words catch you off guard. You freeze, your breath catching in your throat as the reality of what he’s offering sinks in.
“Boston?” you echo, trying to find the words to make sense of it. “You’d do that for me?”
Steve’s expression softens, and for the first time in weeks, there’s a flicker of the man you used to know, the man who had always put you first, even when you didn’t ask him to. “I thought you’d know by now,” he says, voice rough. “I’d do anything for you.”
The room is so quiet, you can hear the faintest hum of the refrigerator in the corner. Your heart aches at the offer, the tenderness in his words, but it doesn’t feel like it’s enough anymore. There’s too much pain, too many years of not seeing each other in the way you needed.
“Are you sure?” you ask quietly, your voice barely above a whisper. “I never wanted you to leave. I never wanted you to make this sacrifice.”
Steve runs a hand through his hair, his eyes distant for a moment before he meets your gaze again. “I need to move forward too,” he says, his words heavier than any argument. “I can’t keep staying here, in the past. We both deserve to start over.”
You nod, biting your lip to stop the tears. The decision feels like it’s being made for you, but deep down, you know this is how it has to be. There’s no going back.
The lawyer shifts in her seat, placing the papers neatly in front of both you and Steve, before her gaze flickers over to you. “So, the house,” she starts again, her tone matter-of-fact, “it seems you both have agreed on selling it. The next thing to settle is how to divide the assets.”
You take a slow breath, your fingers moving absently across the edge of the paper she slid towards you. It’s almost surreal, how quickly things are moving, how final this all feels. Steve, who once promised to build a future with you, now feels like a stranger across the table, though the love is still there in the quiet spaces between words.
“I don’t want anything extra,” you say, your voice steady, even though your chest aches. “We’ll just split what’s left from the sale of the house. Put it away for Lily,” you suggest, glancing at Steve. “For her future, for college, something.”
Steve’s expression softens, his eyes searching yours with that old tenderness that has always been there. “I agree,” he says quietly. “That seems like the right thing to do.”
The lawyer nods, but it’s clear her focus isn’t entirely on your decisions, it’s more on the technicalities, on what’s easiest to process. She jots something down on her legal pad, then moves on. “Alright, then. We’ll make sure that’s accounted for.”
The conversation moves forward in a blur who gets what from the furniture to the personal belongings, but you barely register any of it. All you can think of is Lily.
“And about custody…” The lawyer’s voice drops into a more formal tone. “I’d suggest full custody for Mr. Rogers. Given he is Lily’s biological father, it’s in the best interest of the child to stay with him primarily. An 80-20 arrangement sounds fair.”
The words feel like a slap, so sudden, so cold, and you can’t help the shock that floods your system. You shake your head, your heart pounding in your chest. “What? Wait…what?” You can’t keep the panic out of your voice. “Why would I only get her 20% of the time?” Your eyes flicker to Steve, who is staring at the lawyer in disbelief, but neither of you can find your voice for a long moment.
The lawyer, her demeanor impassive, turns her gaze toward Steve. “Mr. Rogers, as the biological father, you have the right to full custody. A 50-50 split might be acceptable, but with the current arrangement, it seems 80-20 is best for Lily.”
You feel your throat constrict, words hanging in the air between you like a weight. Biological father. That doesn’t define you as a parent, and it doesn’t mean Steve should take her away from you.
“She’s my daughter too,” you say, the words sharp and raw. You finally look at Steve for help, your heart pounding as the injustice of it settles into your bones. “You know that. I’ve raised her just as much as you have.”
Steve’s brow furrows deeply at the lawyer’s suggestion. He leans forward slightly, his voice firm as he speaks. “No,” he says, his tone unwavering. “That’s not how it’s going to be.” His hand reaches across the table, his fingers lightly brushing yours as he glances at you, offering the small reassurance you need. “We’re doing 50-50. Lily deserves that. We both deserve that.”
The lawyer glances at Steve, her expression momentarily calculating, before she exhales and straightens her papers. “Are you sure you want that, Mr. Rogers?” she asks, the doubt laced in her voice. “It’s not typical.”
Steve doesn’t hesitate. “Yes, I’m sure,” he replies, voice steady with conviction. “We’ll share custody. Lily should be able to spend equal time with both of us.”
The lawyer shrugs, not bothering to mask her disapproval. “Very well,” she mutters, scribbling something on her notepad. “I’ll draft the papers.”
There’s a silence that falls over the room again, thick with tension, as the lawyer moves on to other legal details. You’re still reeling from the custody suggestion, the sting of it settling like a rock in your stomach. You want to argue with her, demand that she see how much you’ve been there for Lily, how much you’ve been her mother in every sense of the word. You are her mother.
But before you can gather the words, the lawyer speaks again, her gaze shifting to you with a dismissive air. “One last thing, Ms. Y/N,” she says. “James….’Bucky’...is he stable enough for Lily to be around? I’m asking because he’s a veteran. If she’ll be around him, I need to know if there are any mental stability concerns.”
You freeze, your blood running cold. Your fingers grip the edge of the table, the questions crashing over you like waves. Is he stable enough for Lily? How dare she?
Your breath hitches, and before you can stop it, the words burst from you, your voice trembling with rage. “Are you kidding me?” You push back your chair, your heart pounding in your chest. “You’re questioning Bucky’s stability because he’s a veteran?” The question feels like an accusation you can’t ignore. How dare she?
Steve immediately stands, his chair scraping loudly against the floor as he moves to your side. His voice is calm, but his anger is clear. “That’s unnecessary,” he says firmly. “We’re not having that discussion.”
The lawyer looks momentarily taken aback, her eyes narrowing. “It’s standard procedure. If he’s going to be around Lily, I need to know if there are any concerns—”
Steve cuts her off, his jaw clenched. “It’s not standard procedure, and you’re not questioning someone like that. He’s stable, I trust Y/N.. There’s no need for this to be a part of the discussion.”
The lawyer purses her lips but finally nods, reluctantly marking something down. “I’ll make a note of it,” she mutters, almost as if she’s lost interest in arguing further. “I’ll finalize the custody agreement, and we can move forward.”
The tension in the room remains heavy, but Steve stays by your side, his presence grounding you. You take a deep breath, trying to steady yourself after the emotional whirlwind of the meeting.
And as the lawyer gathers her papers and prepares to leave, Steve gently places his hand on your back. “You alright?” he asks, his voice soft with concern. You nod, though your throat is tight.
“I will be,” you reply, your voice quiet but determined. “We both will.”
-----
The low thrum of music pulsed through the crowded house, colored lights flickering over worn-out couches and half-finished drinks. Wanda leaned against the wall near the back door, clutching a red solo cup she hadn’t touched in over an hour. She watched, heart aching in her chest, as Steve stood across the room laughing at something Natasha said, his whole face lighting up in a way that Wanda knew too well.
Natasha beamed at him, her hand brushing his forearm casually. The two of them were drawn together like magnets, and even though Wanda had prepared herself for this, for years, really..it still felt like a blow she hadn’t braced for hard enough.
“You’re real bad at hiding it, you know,” Clint’s voice cut through her thoughts, soft and not unkind. He nudged her shoulder gently with his own.
Wanda blinked, forcing a smile that didn’t quite reach her eyes. “Hiding what?”
Clint snorted under his breath, glancing across the room where Steve and Natasha stood in their own little world. “Come on, Wands. It’s me.”
Wanda looked down at her cup, twisting it between her fingers. “It wouldn’t matter anyway,” she said quietly, almost to herself. “He loves her.”
Clint was silent for a moment, then shifted so he was blocking her view of them, as if giving her a second to breathe. “You never told him, did you?”
Wanda shook her head. “It wouldn’t have changed anything.” She managed a hollow laugh. “It was just… a crush.”
Clint raised an eyebrow, the kind of look that said you and I both know that’s a lie, but he didn’t call her on it. He sighed instead, raking a hand through his hair. “You’re too good sometimes, you know that?”
She shrugged, the motion feeling too heavy for her thin shoulders. “She’s my best friend and so is he,” she whispered. “What could I want more than to see them both happy?”
Clint hummed and just stood there with her, offering his presence in the quiet way only he could. No speeches, no false comforts. Just a shared, silent understanding. Clint tilted his head toward the door. “Come on. Let’s get some air before you drown in here.”
Wanda smiled, small and grateful, letting him lead her outside into the cool night, away from the golden couple inside and the weight of a love she would never speak aloud, a love that would never be known.
--------
The sun was beginning to set, casting long shadows across the street as Steve walked, his footsteps slow, heavy, as if every step carried the weight of everything he was trying to outrun. The house…your house, his house, felt suffocating now. The walls that had once echoed with laughter, arguments, and shared memories now seemed to close in on him. He couldn’t stay there. Not anymore, not with everything unraveling so quickly.
Steve phone buzzed in his pocket, but he ignored it. He didn’t want to talk to anyone right now. He needed air, space to breathe before he spiraled.
He found himself standing in front of Wanda’s apartment door before he even realized how he got there. He didn’t knock right away. He hesitated, his hand hovering over the door, as though it had a mind of its own.
Finally, with a quiet exhale, he raised his fist and knocked.
A few moments passed before the door cracked open. Wanda stood there, looking surprised, her eyes widening when she saw him. There was a softness in her gaze, a quiet understanding, but it was laced with something else. Something unspoken.
“Steve?” she asked, her voice soft, confused. “What’s wrong?”
He sighed, running a hand through his hair. “Can we talk?”
Wanda hesitated, glancing back over her shoulder as if she was wondering whether to let him in. After a brief pause, she stepped back, opening the door wider. “Come in.”
The apartment was warm, lived-in, and cozy. A stark contrast to the coldness he felt in his own life right now. He stepped inside, and Wanda closed the door behind him, the quiet click of the lock sounding louder than it should have.
They stood there in the entryway, an uncomfortable silence hanging between them. Wanda led him to the couch, where they both sat, not looking at each other at first.
“I didn’t want to be there,” Steve finally said, breaking the silence, his voice thick. “I didn’t want to be in that house anymore.”
Wanda nodded slowly, not needing to ask why. She already knew. She’d known for so long. “I understand,” she said quietly.
“We signed the papers today.” Steve said suddenly. “The house, we’re selling it, we’re doing 50/50 custody, we haven't talked logistics yet but Lily and I are gonna move to Boston, so Y/N can be home, so she can be with him.” Steve's voice cracked, his eyes watered, before pausing to take a deep breath. “Wanda… I—” Steve started, but words caught in his throat. He ran his hands over his face, frustrated. “I had no idea.”
She shifted slightly, “I’m so sorry Steve, I really am but…”, her eyes narrowing as she met his gaze, her voice soft, but sharp, too. “You really had no idea?”
He exhaled a frustrated breath and shook his head. “I had a feeling. A hint, but I never… I never thought it was anything. Not enough to risk our friendship. Not enough to make things weird between us.”
Wanda let out a quiet laugh, but it wasn’t a happy sound. It was almost bitter. “You really didn’t notice? All the times I held back because you were with Natasha? All the times I pushed you to go after her? All the times I welcomed y/n into my life, into our life, like she was just another person?”
Steve looked at her, regret clouding his expression. “I didn’t know, Wanda. I swear I didn’t. I was too focused on my own shit, on trying to get things right with Natasha… and then with Y/N and then him, and everything—”
Wanda’s voice cracked slightly, though she didn’t look away. “I didn’t want to make it harder for you. I’ve always been in the background, Steve. I’ve always been the one who picked you up when things went wrong, when Natasha didn’t understand, when everything was falling apart and I did it because I love you. I’ve always loved you.”
Steve blinked, stunned by the confession. “Wanda…” His voice faltered for a moment. “Why didn’t you ever tell me? Why didn’t you ever just say it, it's me..”
She cut him off, shaking her head slowly. “Because I wanted you to be happy, Steve and Natasha made you happy. I could see that. I was fine being your friend. I was happy, just being your friend. But Clint…” Wanda’s voice wavered slightly. “Clint crossed the line, Steve. He knew. He could see it. He saw it before anyone else did.”
Steve’s jaw tightened. He had been blind to everything, hadn’t he? He could feel the weight of her words crashing down on him. “Clint’s been out of line for a while, he shouldn't have done or said half the things he has over the last couple years, losing Nat isn’t an excuse anymore.”
“I forgave him, we already talked.” Wanda exhaled sharply. “At your birthday party, when he…when he outed me. I never wanted anyone to know, I was happy in my bubble with just us two knowing but he knew how much I cared about you, and he couldn’t let it go especially with everything that has been happening with Y/N and how I had to listen to you vent about her, I just it's been so hard Steve…”
Steve’s head dropped into his hands, his heart aching with the weight of everything. He’d missed so much. So many things he should’ve known. “I never knew,” he whispered, the guilt washing over him. “I didn’t know how much you sacrificed.”
Wanda shook her head, her expression softening, though her heartache was still there. “It doesn’t matter now,” she said quietly. “We’re here, Steve and we’re both just trying to move forward, aren’t we?”
“Where do we go from here?” he asked, his voice raw. “I don’t want to lose you, Wanda. I never wanted to lose you.”
Wanda looked away for a moment, gathering her thoughts. When she spoke again, her voice was steady but full of emotion. “I’m not sure,” she admitted. “I’m not sure where we go from here.”
Steve sighed deeply. “I don’t want to lose you as a friend, Wanda. I don’t want to lose the only person who’s always had my back.”
Wanda turned to him then, her eyes soft with understanding. “You should know by now that you won’t lose me. You won’t ever lose me, even when everything else feels like it’s slipping away.”
Steve watched her, the truth of it settling in. She was always going to be there. Even if she never got what she secretly wanted, she was always gonna be a constant in his life, in his heart.
“Yeah,” he whispered. “I know. I just…” His voice trailed off, and for a moment, the silence between them was comfortable. Steve pulled her into a tight hug and they both just held each other for a while. Before Steve pulled away, “I’m glad you forgave Clint, I don’t know if I’m ready to.” His voice was soft, “Anyway, I need to go get Lily, Y/N and I are telling her everything tomorrow.”
Wanda nodded, “Let me know how it goes? Lily is tough like Nat, she’ll be fine.”
Steve nodded, turning toward the door, but then he stopped. Before he left, he turned back to Wanda, his voice soft. “For the record, Wanda… I felt the same way. I always have.”
The words hung in the air, tender and broken, before Steve opened the door and stepped out, leaving Wanda alone in the quiet of her apartment, a quiet that had never felt more final.
The door clicked shut, leaving only the sound of her breath.
-----
The house party is loud, the air thick with music and the hum of chatter. You’re leaning against the wall near the kitchen, a red cup of punch in your hand, watching your boyfriend, Jeremy, talk to his friends. He’s laughing, but you don’t hear the humor anymore. You just hear the whispers behind your back, the subtle glances from the guys as they eye you like you’re some kind of prize to be won and when one of them mutters something about you not being “pure,” you feel a sinking sensation in your stomach.
You try to ignore it, pretending like everything’s fine, but then Jeremy’s voice cuts through the noise, loud enough for everyone to hear.
“I mean, she’s not a virgin, you know?” he says, chuckling like it’s no big deal. The other guys burst into laughter. You feel your face flush with embarrassment.
“What the hell did you just say?” you hear someone ask, and you don’t have to look to know who it is. You can hear the low, familiar growl in Bucky’s voice, the one that makes your heart skip a beat. You glance over and see him sitting on the couch, a couple of cheerleaders beside him, all leaning into him with flirty grins. But he’s not paying them attention. His eyes are locked on you, narrowed with concern, anger flashing across his features.
Jeremy shrugs, a smug smirk on his face. “I said, she’s no virgin. I bet even you didn’t know that. She’s a little slut, but hasn’t put out for me yet. I thought she was making me wait because she was one but apparently Lisa saw her and some dude doing the deed in a truck bed over the summer. But she’s gonna put out for me tonight, now thagI know her little secret, right babe?”
The words cut through you like a knife, and you feel the heat of shame rise to your cheeks, hot tears pricking at the corners of your eyes. You want to run, to hide, but you can’t move. You’re frozen.
That’s when Bucky stands up. The girls at his side don’t matter anymore, the flirting forgotten as he brushes them off and strides toward you, his gaze unwavering. He’s done listening.
“What the fuck did you just say?” Bucky’s voice is low, but it’s the kind of low that makes the air heavy, the kind that makes everyone in the room stop and turn.
Jeremy laughs, a bitter sound that you can barely stomach. “I said she’s a slut, It’s no secret anymore, her fucks a guy in an ugly ass truck? A dirty little s l u t.” His voice is a taunt, but Bucky’s already stepping closer to him, fury simmering in his eyes.
“You don’t get to talk about her like that,” Bucky snaps. His fist clenches at his side, and before you can say anything, he’s shoving Jeremy back with enough force to knock him off balance.
The laughter dies, but the tension in the room spikes. Jeremy, now pissed, swings at Bucky, landing a punch on his shoulder. Bucky doesn’t even flinch.
“Keep her name out of your mouth,” Bucky growls, and without another word, he’s launching forward, fists flying. The first punch catches Jeremy square in the jaw, sending him stumbling back, but he’s not done. Another guy, one of Jeremy’s friends, rushes to his side and lands a punch on Bucky’s cheek, but Bucky doesn’t back down.
He swings again, this time knocking the guy down onto the floor. The room erupts into chaos, but all you can see is Bucky, standing tall in the middle of it, a bloody lip and fury in his eyes. He doesn’t care about the rest of the party, about the way everyone is watching. All that matters is you.
“Bucky, stop!” you cry, rushing forward, but Bucky’s already pulled the other guy off him, throwing him to the side. His lip is split open, blood staining his teeth, but he’s standing there like nothing’s wrong. Like he would do it all over again for you.
“Let’s go,” he says, his voice quiet, rough. He doesn’t need to explain himself. He turns to walk out, pulling you with him, but you stop, glancing back at the chaos behind you. The party’s still going on, but it feels like a different world now, a world you don’t belong in anymore.
Bucky’s hand on your arm tightens, and he leads you outside, the cool night air hitting your skin like a slap of reality. You both make your way down the driveway, and once you’re out of sight, he pulls you into his arms, holding you like he never wants to let go.
“Are you okay?” His voice is low, but the concern in it hits you harder than anything else. He’s not worried about the fight, not about his lip or the blood on his knuckles. He’s worried about you.
“I’m fine,” you whisper, shaking your head, but it’s a lie. You’re not fine. Not when you hear Jeremy’s words echoing in your mind.
Bucky cups your face, his thumb brushing across your cheek, wiping away the first tear that slips down. “Don’t let them get to you,” he says, his voice firm. “You’re not what he said. You’re so much more.”
You lean into his touch, your breath catching as another tear slips free. You don’t even care. You’ve been holding it in for too long.
Bucky presses a soft kiss to your forehead, his voice barely a whisper. “I would do anything for you, you know that, right?”
You nod, the words too thick in your throat to say back to him. But you don’t need to say anything, you know.
Bucky swing’s his arm around your shoulder. “Alright let's get out of here and go hang out in my ugly ass truck.”
----
The house feels eerily quiet after Steve leaves, the sound of the door clicking shut still ringing in your ears. The weight of everything, of the divorce papers, of the house, of all the years that you spent wrapped up in the dreams you once shared with Steve hangs heavy in the air. But it’s different now…final. You take a slow, steadying breath, feeling the tears welling up, but you push them back.
You walk to the bedroom, opening the closet doors and pulling a duffel bag from the shelf. You try to keep your movements automatic, but the act of packing, of getting ready to leave the place that once felt like home, hits harder than you expect. You start with your essentials: a few changes of clothes, toiletries, anything that will help you get by for the next few days, maybe weeks. You pause for a moment, staring at the bag. This isn’t just a change of clothes. It’s your life, packed into something small, something portable.
You grab your phone off the bed and quickly dial your mom’s number, your fingers trembling a little. It rings a few times before she picks up.
“Hey, sweetie. How are you?”
“We signed the papers today,” you say softly, sitting on the bed, trying to steady your breath. “Everything’s done.”
Her voice softens, a touch of sadness in her words. “I know it’s hard, honey. But you’re strong. You always have been.”
You try to hold back the tears, but they slip out, anyway. You wipe your eyes quickly, feeling the rawness of it all. “It’s done,” you repeat. “But I don’t know what comes next. Steve’s willing to move to Boston. We both want a fresh start somewhere else.”
You hear her pause for a moment, then she says, “I’m glad you’re thinking of what’s best for you. Are you coming home?”
The words hit you unexpectedly, and for the first time since this whole ordeal started, something feels lighter. “Yes, I was hoping I could bring some of my stuff to your house. Just for a little while until I figure things out.”
“Of course you can, sweetheart. You don’t need to ask. I’ve always got a place for you.” Her voice is soft, loving, the kind of warmth you haven’t felt in a while. “You’ve got this, and I’m here for you. Always.”
“Thanks, Mom,” you whisper, the words thick in your throat.
“Always,” she echoes. “Everything happens the way it’s supposed to happen, remember that sweetie. I love you.”
You choke back a sob, nodding even though she can’t see it. “I love you too.”
After a few more words of reassurance, you end the call, feeling the weight of everything slowly beginning to settle. You look at your phone for a moment before switching apps, hoping to start looking into moving companies, but then your messages catch your eye.
You see a text from Bucky, and when you open it, it’s a picture of the food he’s having, but it’s not just food. He’s made a smiley face with his French fries. You can’t help but laugh softly, the silly image lightening the mood for the first time today.
You glance at the clock, realizing it’s been more than an hour since he sent it. You smile, shaking your head at how he always manages to make you smile. You press his name to call him, and the phone rings for barely a second before he picks up.
“Hey, sweetheart,” he greets you, his voice warm, familiar.
You laugh, “Hey. So, the papers are signed.”
He’s quiet for a moment. “How do you feel?”
You exhale, looking around the room for a moment before speaking, your voice steady but emotional. “It’s sad. It hurts. But… I feel free. Like everything is falling into place, the way it always should’ve been. You know, I used to feel like there was this missing piece to my puzzle, and I just kept trying to make the pieces fit, but now it feels like everything’s shifting and I’m okay with that, I’m okay.”
He lets out a soft chuckle, the sound grounding you. “I’m glad, sweetheart. Really glad.”
You take a deep breath and ask, “So what are you up to?”
“I just finished eating with Sam,” he says casually. “Just walking around now.”
You chew your bottom lip for a moment before speaking up. “I don’t really have anywhere else to go right now. Would it be okay if I stayed with you again? At the hotel?”
There’s a beat of silence on the other end, and then he responds, the warmth in his voice clear. “You don’t even have to ask. Meet me at that café from this morning.”
You smile, feeling that same sense of comfort you’ve always felt with him. “Okay.”
As you walk toward the café, you keep the phone pressed to your ear, and Bucky stays on the line and you tell him everything. “So what’s this about Boston?” he asks, curiosity in his tone.
You let out a breath. “Steve said he’s willing to move there. He wants to make it easier for me to start over and I think… I’m going to move back home for a while. Stay with my mom until I figure things out.”
There’s a brief silence on the other end of the phone, and you can almost hear the gears turning in Bucky’s mind, the way his words seem to hesitate before he speaks again. His voice softens, almost cautious, as if he’s searching for the right words. “And what’s that mean for you? Are you planning to stay with your mom for a while?”
You exhale slowly, nodding even though he can’t see it. It’s not a decision you’ve fully made, but it’s the one that feels most comforting right now. “Yeah, I think so. I don’t know yet,” you admit, your gaze drifting as you walk down the street, the rhythm of your footsteps matching the pace of your thoughts. “But it feels right, you know? At least until I figure things out. I don’t want to rush into anything that doesn’t feel like the right move. I just need some space to breathe and figure out what comes next.”
He’s quiet for a moment, and you can almost feel his presence, his attention on you even across the phone line. It’s one of those silences that feels heavy with meaning, as if he’s considering all that you’ve just said. “So, you’re moving back home?” His voice is quieter now, almost like he’s absorbing the weight of the decision you’ve made.
“Yeah, Buck. I’m moving home.” The words come out of you without hesitation, but a part of you still feels like the ground is shifting beneath your feet. You glance at the street signs as you pass, the familiar landmarks of your old neighborhood suddenly feeling foreign. “I think it’s the right thing to do. It feels like a fresh start. I just need time to figure things out, you know?”
As you round the corner, you spot Bucky up ahead, his silhouette outlined by the fading sunlight. The evening air is cool against your skin, and you hang up the phone just as you reach him. The moment your eyes meet, his smile hits you like a wave. It’s bright, genuine, and it instantly softens the knot of tension you hadn’t even realized you were holding. His cheeks are flushed from the walk, his face a picture of contentment.
You raise an eyebrow at him, feeling a smile tug at your own lips. “What’s got you so happy?” The question comes out teasing, but there’s something in his expression that makes it feel more like you’re genuinely curious, like his happiness is something you can’t help but want to understand.
Bucky grins wider, a playful glint in his eye. “You,” he says, his voice light but with that familiar warmth. “You’re the only thing that can make my face as red as a tomato and make my cheeks hurt like this.” He’s still grinning, like the words are effortless, like they come naturally to him.
You laugh softly, feeling a warmth spread through you. The sound is light, free, like you’ve exhaled a breath you didn’t even know you were holding. It’s so easy with him. He makes it easy to forget about everything else that’s weighing you down, even just for a moment.
You start walking together toward the hotel, side by side, the cool evening air brushing against your skin. You slip your hands into your jacket pockets, feeling the comfort of having him close. Your conversation flows easily, shifting from topic to topic without effort. You talk about the lawyer and the papers, about the future and the uncertainty that still hangs over everything. But there’s something comforting in the rhythm of your words, in the simplicity of it.
“So, when are you heading back home?” you ask, glancing at him as he presses the button for the crosswalk. His movements are familiar, easy, like he’s just there, a constant in your life.
“Um, in a few days, why?” he asks, glancing at you with a knowing look. “Everything okay?”
You nod, the words coming out a little more thought-out this time. “Would you mind taking a few boxes for me to my mom’s house?” You let the words hang in the air, not really needing to explain, but giving him enough to understand what you’re asking.
His brow furrows slightly, his expression softening as he looks at you. “You’re not coming back yet?” His voice is quiet, almost like he’s trying to gauge your response, but it doesn’t sound judgmental. Just curious.
You shake your head slowly, eyes on the sidewalk in front of you. “No. I’ve still got some stuff to finish up here. I’m hoping to get everything squared away before the end of the month.”
Bucky nods, his expression thoughtful. “Yeah, of course,” he says, his voice steady and calm, with a hint of sadness.
“So, would you mind?” you ask, not needing to say it again, but wanting to hear him say it.
Bucky laughs, a low, warm sound that instantly puts you at ease. “Of course not,” he says, his voice teasing now, but the sincerity is still there, tucked into every word. “I’d do anything for you. You should know that by now.”
#bucky barnes x reader#bucky barnes fanfiction#bucky x reader#bucky barnes#bucky barnes x y/n#sebastian stan x reader#bucky x you#bucky barnes fanfic#bucky barnes angst#bucky x y/n#bucky fanfic#james bucky buchanan barnes#bucky x steve#james bucky barnes#bucky barnes au#steve rogers x y/n#steve rogers x you
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pacman (peter maximoff x mutant!fem!reader)
a/n: i had this idea after i bought a handheld pacman game. reader in this has powers that allow her/them to control and create technology. basically has mechanical mastery but like as a power. no set time period for this really, but peter and reader are in their 20s
warnings: none! just fluff, mild language, mentions of one minor injury. angst if you squint
summary: reader notices that peter gets bored often and decides to make him a gift
word count: 974
GIF NOT MINE
~~~
It had taken hours to create it. You spent so much time holed away in a tiny lab area that you were given to practice your powers. Hank practically begged you to leave and interact with someone other than him because of how long it had taken.
All the little things you had begun to notice about Peter Maximoff were piling up in your mind. It had gotten to the point where journaling was almost making it worse, and Jean and Charles kept looking at you with pleading looks in their eyes. They’d chastise you in your head, telling you to just tell him so your brain could quiet down.
Not in the mood to ruin the vibe the school had going though, you stuck to your details that you kept safely guarded in your heart. How he’d fidget, his favorite games, the movies he’d stand and watch while getting side tracked in the lounge, the bands he loved, and the boredom he inevitably got 5 minutes into a plane ride to a mission.
You smiled as you boxed your creation and put it safely in your room.
…..
“Peter!” you call out to him when you see him in the hallway later that week. You were done teaching for the day and you knew he was too. He looks up from the paper a student was showing him and nods at the kid, sending him on his way.
“Hey! What’s going on?” he says, speeding up to you and brushing against your side. You both start walking in sync to the dining area.
“Just got done teaching for the day,” you say quickly. “Listen, I have something for you.”
He lights up a little. “What is it? Tell me, tell me-”
You laugh at him. “Hold on a minute, geez. We gotta eat dinner first, and then you can have it.” You arrive at the dining room and stop at the end of the line.
He groans dramatically and you laugh. “You’re so mean to me, and for what? Can I have a hint at least?” He hands you a plate before grabbing one for himself.
“Hmm,” you pretend to ponder as you scoop food onto your plate. “Nope.” You look at him with a playful smile on your face as he pouts at you.
The times you laughed the most are when you were with Peter. Your face usually hurts after you guys hang out, and that was pretty much everyday since you arrived at the school. Even when he accidentally bruised your foot from running over it so fast, he still managed to make you laugh in an effort to apologize.
You both sit down to eat. “You’ll live.”
~~
He barely makes it through dinner. You’re surprised he doesn’t super speed you to your room once you put your plates away. He is practically dragging you there though.
Once you make it to your room, you purposely start moving slowly to unlock the door. He playfully smacks your arm and you laugh at him, moving at a normal speed (well, for you that is).
“Okay, you have to sit patiently and wait,” you say, gesturing to your bed. “I have to grab it from where I hid it.”
He snorts but obliges. You raise your eyebrows to make sure he stays while you open your dresser drawer, reaching under a shirt to grab out the small box.
“I spent a lot of time making this, which is where I’ve been disappearing to lately. If it breaks just let me know.” You’re shaking a little bit, heart rate slowly getting higher. You hope he doesn’t notice as you hand him the box.
He looks up at you with soft eyes before he opens it. Despite his super speed, he opens the box slowly and unwraps the gift. He gasps.
“No fucking way. Is this what I think it is?” You let a small smile seep through on your face as you nod. “How did you do this? Holy shit, wait, you made this?”
You grin, finally relaxing a little now that you know he likes it. “The hardest part was the plastic but I had Hank and Xavier help a little bit. That’s why I asked you if I could look at your PacMan machine though.”
Before you even realize what’s happening, he’s standing up and pulling you in for a tight hug. You’re taken aback but quickly relax into it, wrapping your arms around him tightly. He pulls back after a minute, still holding you slightly in his arms.
“I’m really glad you like it. I know how much you like that game, so I figured you could use a smaller version instead of having to go to yo-" You’re cut off when Peter’s lips attach to yours.
Despite your shock, you melt into the kiss almost immediately. He pulls you closer by your hips once you relax, and you reach up to run your hands through his hair. He sighs and pulls back once you do, resting his forehead against yours with his eyes shut. You both catch your breath for a moment.
“Sorry, I-”
“Maximoff, why are you apologizing for kissing me?” He smiles at that, pressing another quick peck to your lips.
“I guess I should say sorry for not doing it sooner.” He’s running his thumbs along the side of your hips, causing you to shiver. “Are you cold?”
“No. Unless it gets me one of your hoodies. In that case, yes.” He laughs at you and pulls you in, cradling your head against his chest. You wrap your arms around him again, content with just standing here like this.
“You can have as many as you want.” He pauses for a moment. “You want to cuddle in one while I try this thing out?”
“Hell yeah.”
#peter maximoff x reader#quicksilver x reader#xmen#peter maximoff fluff#quicksilver fluff#xmen x reader
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