#the first one is him obviously btw. god this is confusing

[iceunhie]

— phaethetically in love !

premise. belle thinks her brother is the most oblivious person in sixth street. the reason? one: because his (super obvious) crush on you is practically the worst kept secret in new eridu, and two: because he can't even see that said crush is reciprocated! good thing he has one (1) amazing, wonderful, nosy sister to help him out, yeah?

or, belle thinks the two of you are a prime example of an s tier romance movie; and she really wants to skip to the final arc already.

pairing. wise x gn!reader.

warnings: kinda ooc wise (i just started the game), wise is a loser (lovingly), belle is an instigator (proudly), comedy, facepalm moments.

a/n: for @vxnuslogy and @milksnake-tea bc yes wise kissers yes

MY (rlly cool btw 🥺) MASTERLIST || INBOX !

“you're in love with [name], aren't you?”

like all siblings in the world—or what's left of it, belle schemes.

(against wise, of course. obviously.)

her brother bursts into a mess immediately, nearly spilling his cup ramen all over his new shirt, chopsticks sticking out. laughing nervously. general chop would not be proud. “who told you that? i mean— haha, who said that, belle?”

his sister rolls her eyes. “me, myself. i.” she emphasizes, leaning her elbows against the table and putting her palms together; the grin she wears right now is so serene, but not in the angelic, nice way. belle smiles and wise finally thinks, oh. my sister may need to book herself to the closest self-help guru in new eridu.

“i have reason to believe that you, my dearest brother, are in love with [name].”

her voice goes up an octave at the last bit, leading wise to stuff her mouth with potato chips. already, heads have turned. “mff.”

“keep your voice down! and stop broadcasting it to everyone here-”

“what, i am right, aren't i? they clearly like you back, so why haven't you confessed yet?”

“keep. your. voice. down.” wise says, and belle's shit eating grin only widens as she sees her brother's ears tinged with pink. “and... how did you even know that?” he asks, mortified.

“well, one: because it's obvious—like, have you seen how obvious you are?” belle huffs, taking a bite of the potato chip with force (personal grudges are involved). “and two, because they like you back, dummy!”

because when belle sees the two of you together, it's like wise focuses on no one else. you are the center of his world—and he is just being pulled to bask in your light. his eyes soften like they melt only for you, and wise looks like all he is is, all he wants to be, is to belong with you.

(and, wise likes to stare at you for ungodly amounts of time. belle even caught him staring when you were petting a cat by the street and decided to name the stray ‘wise’; courtesy of him, apparently. the cat literally just had grey fur.

“wise.”

“hm?”

“you're practically spawning heart eyes now.”)

it's sickening. (in a oh my god my brother is in love kind of way, mind you.)

“so!” belle says, a devilish sparkle in her eyes. “allow your dearest sister to help you out, 'kay?”

wise nearly coughs up blood.

“what?!”

so at present, belle compiles her (hastily written) list of romantic moments you and wise have shared. she's not surprised—the number can be counted on one hand. diabolical, disappointing, world-ending! she resists the urge to cough up blood.

first, a coff cafe date with tin man's help: a fail. tin man's wingman capabilities were very superb, but she never heard the end of it when wise was lecturing her about how tin man kept sending over heart shaped desserts and little fortune cookies. the fortune cookies in question which said ‘you can do it!’ and a latte with art of caricature tin man making a heart. (you were very confused). belle thought it was motivating. wise thought it was mortifying.

next, even instilling help from fairy to calculate statistics about what event would you two be likely to be together. fairy said, and belle quotes: “probably never. that kind of pining's for the long run, with the other master's current experience. give it a year or six, master.”

so, she's currently face-palming.

did her brother really have zero game? why were the two of you just dancing around each other?! she's tried everything—from letting you two spend more time with each other in commissions, her inviting you over more to leave you to chat with her brother, and even the entirety of sixth street has lent their aid! how were you two not dating yet?!

“didn't they go on an arcade date at random play yesterday?” belle mutters. “that should've increased your progress by a long mile, bro! even general chop said you two were really, really close in the noodle shop....”

just what was she going to do now? at this rate, her brother would be relationshipless in no time! in fairy's words again, it would be phaethetic. and that would be a phaethal blow on her pride.

“...master, i said no such thing.”

“well, now you did.”

“The Ethereal Reckoning,” there's a pep in your step, the boxes full of movie DVDs in your arms as you walk back to the movie store. it was heavy, but at least you got to walk with the grey-haired proxy beside you. “That movie was great! Thanks for recommending it to me.”

Sporting a dopey, lovesick grin in response, wise nods at that, content to listen to your voice. it was actually belle's idea to let you lend movies you like over so the two of you could talk about it back and forth. wise would need to (begrudgingly) treat her to a bowl of ramen later on.... she saved him—he probably wouldn't even be talking to you for this long at this point, let alone hang out with you without her. for someone so nosy, he guesses his sister was a pretty good wingwoman.

“the main character was pretty similar to billy, you know?” you ramble on as wise listens. “i mean, because they were an android too, and...”

he finds that he's content to listen to anything you say, really. (right now he doesn't really know what you're saying, something about a horror ethereal movie, but you could just tell him anything and he would listen).

“i feel like the heroine's death was unnecessary, though.” you sigh, “too much tension just for it to end like that? how anticlimactic.”

your voice was so nice, so warm and easy to listen to, and wise can't even say anything to retort, simply staring with a growing (lovesick) smile on his face. talking to people was hard work, and talking to you? it might just make him combust.

“...ise? wise?”

“ah, huh?” he snaps out of his trance, only to find you mere inches away from his face, the only thing keeping you apart the boxes full of movies he's carrying. “...!”

“are you listening?” you furrow, and someone really might be out to get him right now because in that moment, wise flinches from the proximity, bumping into you.

then, because the universe thinks his life couldn't get more dramatic than it already was—you stagger, about to fall forward.

he moves before he thinks. “watch out!”

and wise.... practically astral-projects to another plane when he feels you fall into his arms, his hands on your waist. he can feel the warmth of your skin on his, the flustered look on your face. (he feels like he's going to die).

the two of you lock eyes for a moment, and wise feels like he's about to so something very stupid and his hands are still on your waist—

“....”

“.....”

someone save him.

“ah...”

“sorry!” you recover first, hurriedly letting yourself pull away from him (much to his disappointment). “i wasn't looking, and i- are you okay, wise?”

“no, no, it's fine.... i-i'm fine....” he hopes his voice isn't as small as it is, he couldn't be smooth to save his life; and wise helps you gather your bearings, his hands brushing against yours, blood rushing to his ears. sheepishly rubbing at his nape. “sorry, i was distracted.”

perhaps in the mood to lift the atmosphere, you sputter out, “no worries! it's fine! besides, you listened to me all this time.... i really enjoyed the movie, really.”

“of course i'll listen.” and before wise can think to stop his traitor of a mouth, the words spill out of his lips like it always wanted to be.

“you're worth paying attention to.”

it's automatic—your face heats up, warming like the sun on a hot day in new eridu, and god, he is such an idiot-

“you think so?” wise gulps. you looked bashful, and were way too adorable right now, and his face felt like it was on fire.... wait, that's not the point! he has to answer you, at least. this is a chance to make progress!

“y-yeah. definitely. i enjoyed... watching the movie with you.” he says. did his voice just crack just now? “we can hang out more often too, even without belle.”

he feels bad for throwing his sister under the bus like that, but—wait, did he just ask you out on a date? (accidentally)

well, it didn't matter because wise feels like he won the lottery right now, because you brighten up immediately. “really?”

then you cough and compose yourself. “i mean, sure! i'm sure it'll be fun, haha...”

awkward silence ensues. uh oh, did he say something wrong? was he too forward? he wants to say something, but something is lodged in his throat, and wise can't bring up a response. (his heart was beating like crazy right now, though).

“uh...”

“....”

then, something soft brushes against the side of his cheek. as fast as it was felt, wise felt the sensation leave just as easily. did you just-?

you just kissed him. on the cheek.

“thanks for hanging out with me, wise.”

“you're welcome- wha- huh?!” he nearly drops the stack of dvd's he was holding. you pull away, an enigmatic smile on your face. face flushed.

before he can even respond, the two of you finally arrive at the movie store. damn it, gods of the world. why did his luck run out now?

“i guess this is your stop.” he blinks, your voice coming back to him. “and, wise?”

“ah, uh, yeah?”

“it's a date, then?” your eyes sparkle and shine a light through his heart. super effective!

is this really happening? is he really going on a date with you—oh, he's so thrilled he could actually burst into song and kick his feet, but belle would tease him ruthlessly after. nosy sisters were so much work....

“yes!” he almost yells it out, but because he didn't want to look uncool in front of you, wise composes himself. play it cool, play it cool. don't mess up this chance! “yes, definitely. it's... it's a date.”

you put down the other stack of dvd's down the table, flashing him a dizzying, lovely smile smile. wise swears he falls even harder for you.

“then it's a date.”

BONUS.

“seriously?! you're going on a date with them?!” belle shouts, so unceremoniously that wise slaps a hand on her mouth.

“not so loud! but, yeah.” he says, face heating up. “your plan worked, sis.”

“yes! yes! finally!” his sister practically cheers, “i can finally be free of your sickening heart eyes... and finally, our street's most anticipated couple is here!”

wise can't help but sigh in fond exasperation. he guesses he'll let her have this one today.

“also, belle?”

“what?”

“you didn't tell anyone about this, did you?”

...

“uhh....”

(on the day of the date, wise receives an abnormal amount of good luck posters. he also gets a disturbing amount of thumbs up from the neighbors.

the last straw? tin man, giving him a baked cake with the words ‘rooting for you!’ covered in pink heart sprinkles.

he facepalms. belle...!)

a/n: d d do you guys get it..... phaethetically...... phaethon..... wise is phaethon and he's awkward in love lol hahahahaha (💀)

@ ICEUNHIE: do not repost translate or plagiarize my works.

[qdbs-writes]

How do you think the Cullens would act around a disinterested crush? Maybe they're fated but reader isn't having it lol

(I love your twilight writing btw thank God someone is still doing it 🤤🤤)

ah it has been many moons since I've gotten a twilight request yay!

Cullen Clan Reacting To Their Crush Being Disinterested In Them

Carlisle Cullen

Being alive for just over 400 years tends to give one a good perspective on life and the bigger picture, and Carlisle sure has a pretty good idea of how all things pan out. So you're not interested in him? That's fine, Carlisle can wait for as long as you need to change your mind.

In the meantime, Carlisle will continue to maintain your friendship and continue to show just how hard he's worked to become the kind caring father figure he is. He knows you'll fall for him, eventually.

Esme Cullen

Obviously, she's not going to stop caring about you just because you don't return her feelings. But she might switch up how she shows her affection.

Rather than flirty winks and suspiciously candle-lit wine tastings, she'll back up to more traditionally motherly affections. Making sure you're eating right, baking cookies, etc. And of course, giving you homemade soup when you're sick is still one of her favourite things to do, no need to stop now.

Edward Cullen

Of course, you're not interested, how could anyone love a monster like him? Who did he think he was, thinking he was worthy of your love? Or so his inner monologue goes.

But it's really not that dramatic, it almost never is, Edward just sprung his crush on you suddenly and it caught you off guard. It was largely the excessively long preamble about how he was an irredeemable murderer that put you off first, but of course, he won't realise that until considerably later.

Rosalie Hale

She's a little relieved actually. All her mortal and immortal life, Rosalie has been aggressively pursued by people she wasn't particularly interested in, so the fact that she can crush on someone who isn't really that interested is a wonderful change of pace.

For the first time ever, Rosalie has butterflies in her stomach, she fumbles with her words when she speaks to you, and she feels like a silly, mortal teenage girl again, begging her mother to let her go to the dance just so she can sneak away to catch a glimpse of someone just like you.

Emmett Cullen

You and Emmett had been good friends for a while so when he casually drops a blissful "We should get married" into the conversation, you initially choke on your drink in laughter.

Emmett's a little heartbroken that you'd laugh at something like that, considering that he was being 100% serious. But since you've known him, the both of you have been constantly cracking up jokes, trying to get on each other's nerves, so no wonder you thought this was another one of his pranks. He decides to take this reaction as a blessing, you have no idea he's actually into you, now he knows he has to work out a different way to confess his feelings for you.

Alice Cullen

She's a little confused obviously, having multiple visions of the two of you in a romantic relationship kind of gave her the impression that it might've been going to come true, but your disinterest says something else altogether.

But the worst part is that those damn visions of you and her together keep coming back, taunting her, luring her in deeper to despair with the thoughts of what might be. It's all getting so intense, so she decides to skip town for a bit, see if that changes anything, or at least helps her clear her head.

Jasper Hale

Oh well, so you're not interested in a romantic relationship, so what? Doesn't mean you can't still be friends. Doesn't mean he can't be the charming Southern gentleman he is. Doesn't mean he can't still pull out chairs or open doors for you. Or send anonymous bouquets to your house. Or leave your favourite snacks in your locker when you're having a rough day. Of course not.

It doesn't mean he can't worry about other people who might want to date you. Doesn't mean he can't scare off people who'd be bad for you. I mean, what else are friends for?

[gooobraghhh]

Very sheepishly submitting myself to your tumblr tboy anon harem.

I've never cum before, whenever I've tried to myself it's too much and I tense up, even with toys. I think you could make me, though.

I would love to be ridiculously crossed-- polishing off a mickey of vodka, questionably high content edible just starting to kick in-- while sitting in your lap and laying against you. I wouldn't be in any position to refuse any more weed you'd like to give me, and would happily smoke however much of a joint, or hit a pen a concerning amount of times.

Sober anxieties completely stifled as I lose any higher order of thinking- gradually beginning to pathetically rutt against one of your thighs, trying to grab and caress your tits, breathily whimpering with my face buried in your shoulder.

Obviously, you don't have to let me get what I want. I would be so pliant under your hands that I could easily be moved, maneuvered to wherever you want me to be (I might have to be at this point, it's questionable if I could stand on my own). I asked for it first, it wouldn't be taking advantage to just help me a little to get where I want.

Forced down to my knees, I might try to warn you that I've never sucked cock before, but I can't imagine it would be that coherent. It doesn't matter, anyway. You'd probably have to softly hit me to remind me to open my mouth, and after that you could use my throat as freely as you'd like.

It would be the same when you lay me down. Through hopelessly needly pleas, I might try and say something, but god knows what actually comes out of my mouth. I wouldn't have enough sense to be embarrassed about that, or having lost my pants some time ago, or how I've been leaking through my underwear. I definitely wouldn't have enough sense to be embarrassed about how (as soon as I'm freed from my boxers) I eagerly spread my legs for you. Honestly, that's about as much physical effort as I would be able to put in in my state.

Take me however you'd like, command me to call you whatever you want, and i'd gasp for mommy every time you ram into me- whimpering as you pull out to do it again and again. I would beg for you, unintelligibly babbling as I shake, whining that I was almost there and trying to convince you that I had been a good enough boy to deserve it. That you're so, so good, and I just want you to touch me. Even if you don't, just you readjusting my hips to fuck deeper into my cunt has me yelping and gripping your sheets.

A few more thrusts directly into my g spot and I'm panting and crying, tensing and jerking my hips against yours as I finally cum on your perfect cock. I'd fall limp against the mattress, and probably breathing for a moment before completely passing out.

It wouldn't make too much of a difference, though- I'm still throbbing around you, still a perfectly fine, tight hole. It's not like I would remember anything that happened while I was awake, and definitely not now. There would be no reason not to continue fucking me, no consequences for using me however you want as I pant and mewl beneath you.

It would be a waste *not* to cum deep inside me at least a few times. Maybe more than a few. Enough times that I when I wake up, confused and sick, I'll feel how hard I had been used. I'd still have cum trickling out of me, and know that I was a bitch for breeding.

Shame that I'll never know how hard I came for you, though

-🐏 (if that's not taken!! ⚓ If it is? He/him)

Sorry for the gooner novel. You don't have to post this btw I'm aware of how mf long and possibly weird it is LMAO. I'm not even into this mommy puppyboy shit fr (side eye) this blog just has me feeling some kinda way. Finishing assignments as repentance godbless

Well it’s clear you can’t make yourself cum because the desperation here is just immense. What a dirty fantasy you have. Sheepish is definitely a good way to describe you. I mean you sent me an ask apologizing for this one the next morning. But don’t worry, it’s okay. Some guys are just perverts like you. They can’t help it. Maybe finally cumming would help with your dirty mind, guess we’ll have to find out won’t we? I’ll make sure to get you all fucked up first since otherwise you’re clearly to much of an anxiety ridden mess. You probably do a lot better all strung out and usable

[lilystyles]

watermelon sugar, highhhh.

part two of the no strings attached series by @lilystyles

no strings attached masterlist & main masterlist xxx

authors note part two baby, enjoy! i hope you all like it i'm still a bit iffy about it! gif creds to original owner. BTW THANKS SO MUCH FOR ALL THE LOVE ON THE FIRST PART OF THIS SERIES KISSES TO U ALL I APPRECIATE ALL THE REBLOGS AND LIKES XX (i can't believe the amount of likes fr!)

brief description basically why harry wrote watermelon sugar high, in my head at least anyway. ;)))

warnings! mentions of sex and sexual themes, smut! (f! receiving, fingering) drug abuse (reader doesn't participate), and swearing. around 5k words :)

inexperienced!virgin!reader x high!fwb!harry

* * * * *

It had been a few weeks since she last saw Harry. She had been avoiding the whole situation completely. If someone asked her she’d deny avoiding him. But whenever she shut her eyes all she saw was him, those green eyes. So he wasn’t forgotten.

Y/n was absolutely ruined that evening. After her long day of lectures, she was so overwhelmed this week and was not feeling her best. She felt like giving up and taking a nap. She had only just gotten home from uni and it was dark outside, she felt like she hadn’t stopped all week. So she was thankful it was a Friday because she didn’t know what she’d do if she had to get up tomorrow morning. She decided to take a long shower and wash the day off her skin and warm up. It had been a long cold and rainy day. She just wanted to get cosy and relax. Get out of this bra, these clothes.

When she got out of the shower smelling fresh and feeling warm, she decided to order Italian for dinner from the local place near her and have a quiet night in, she couldn’t be bothered to cook. 

The group had invited her out tonight but she was so tired she couldn’t be bothered. Anyway, Harry was going and she wasn’t ready to face him just yet. Things had been different ever since New Year’s. She felt different around him, and she didn’t know what that would mean for their friendship. She valued it so much and was worried she’d ruined it. She didn’t know what to do.

She called up the Italian place for dinner while scrolling through Netflix. She sighed, sadly. She felt so stupid right now.

She ordered enough food to fill up her rumbling stomach and pressed play on an all-time favourite comfort movie of hers. Notting Hill. God, she loved Hugh Grant. Harry used to make fun of how much she would watch this when they were roommates and honestly he wasn’t wrong. She watched it more than the average person, but was that such a crime?

She had gotten about a third of the way into the film when her phone buzzed on the table. She rarely got texts anymore, especially considering she only really talked to Daisy by text. She just called everyone else. She was expecting a drunk selfie from Daisy saying how sad she was sad that Y/n wasn’t there. But it wasn’t her.

NO CALLER ID

Y/n why didn’t you come out tonight? I miss you.

She was confused about who it could be. It had to be one of her mates. But seriously she had all their numbers. So who was this?

who is this?

The text was read instantly. Then three dots. Y/n’s heart weirdly began to race.

NO CALLER ID

It’s H. 

Obviously.

Who else are you texting at this hour, missy???

She giggled. He must be drunk, he was always like this when he was drunk. Even though she had been avoiding him; he was like a breath of fresh air. She had missed him. She now realised in the two years he had been away from her she had missed him, too much to let him go.

u drunk haz?

bc u sound drunk.

The text was again read instantly.

NO CALLER ID

I’m not drunk! How dare you!1!!!1

i don’t believe you harold.

NO CALLER ID

:((((((

Y/nnnnnnnnnn

why you sad?

NO CALLER ID

I want you.

what does that mean H?

Read. Then suddenly the replies stopped. Y/n felt stupid all over again but after ten minutes of checking, she put her phone down and tried to focus on the film. She was kind of worried though, was he okay? 

Thoughts of him disappeared as the food arrived. 

She ate slowly and sluggishly while Notting Hill continued to play. It was now up to the bit where naked photos of her had just been realised and she came rushing to Hugh Grant’s aid. She liked this part, it was so intimate and romantic. 

Her tiredness got the best of her though, her full belly and the warmth that her fireplace gave her sent her right off to dreamland. Notting Hill continued to play while she curled up under her old knitted blanket. Soft snores escaped her mouth as the fire crackled.

When she woke up it was probably around two am. She was startled and in the dark, Notting Hill was over, the fire had turned to coals, and the rain had turned to thunder. There was a banging at the door. She thought in her fuzzy mind it might be Daisy or even Miss Jones from next door who was an old lady that always thought Y/n was being loud. She sighed walking over to the door and opening it. Rubbing her eyes. Preparing for either a drunk best mate or an angry old woman.

It was neither of the people she expected. Sleep was still with her, eyes squinted and sore, and her voice was gravelly and quiet when she spoke. 

“Harry?”

He was smirking, of course, dimples and all. Eyes all hooded and sultry, he looked edible like this.

His hair was wet but his clothes were dry except for the tops of his shoulders. He was in a 70s ensemble. This orangey red shaded v-neck jumper was on his chest, some dark wash vintage flares on his legs, and some old white boots. His eyes were red and he was obviously under the influence. Of what? Well, she’d soon find out.

“Can I come in?” He asked. She nodded stepping out of the way. Even though things were different the love for him was still there, she’d have let him in her door no matter what, and she would always be at his beck and call. That’s what scared her. 

“Cute shorts.” He said touching her hip, Y/n blushed up at him. 

They were these old bunny print ones that were too small but she refused to throw them out. She was wearing the bunny slippers that matched too and some shirt that she actually thinks was Harry’s back from when they were roommates. It was navy and so worn it had faded.

He stepped inside. She could smell the potent scent of weed and his cologne. “I’m not going to lie, I’ve ‘ad some spliffs tonight. But I wanted to see you regardless. This just sorta’ happened, y’know how James and I get when we are together.”

Y/n did know. The number of times she’d have to help him get to bed way back when.

“Haz darling, I’m going to go home,” Y/n said softly. He was sat on the couch, high as a kite. 

“What? Why?” He sat up now. Hand reaching hers. 

She smiled. “Not really in the mood tonight, Haz. That’s okay though. Stay, have fun with James. Be safe, yeah?”

He stood up, all wobbly. She helped him steady himself. “Don’t go. Please?”

He got really affectionate and soft when he was high. She’d noticed that. Drunk Harry was all loud laughs and chaos. This scintillating star. High Harry was mellow and touchy. Like a teddy bear.

“‘M tired though, H.”

He grabbed his coat from the couch. “Then I’ll come too.”

She sighed pouting softly. “Not trying to ruin your fun, I know how you and James are.”

“You aren’t. Promise. Take me home please.” He said grabbing her hand. She smiled up at him. 

“Okay.”

“I love you, you know.” He said resting his head on her hair. “Y’one of m’best friends.”

“I love you too, Harry. Always.”

“Okay.” She said softly and he followed her to the couch, which was still warm from her sleeping body.

He put a hand on her thigh it was warm and soft to his touch, and he stroked it to calm them both. There was a nervous energy in the room, which was rare for them. It had always been calm and tranquil when they were together.

“Sorry for waking y’up.” He said, genuinely seeming apologetic.

“It’s alright, Haz. What’s up?” She had a feeling about what he’d say next.

He sighed. “I know we said we’d forget it, but I can’t. I really can’t.”

“It was supposed to be no strings attached…” Y/n said quietly. Because she thought that’s what he wanted.

He looked over. “I know. That’s why I came here.”

“What do you mean?”

He looked down at his hands nervously. “I wanted to talk to you about the whole one-night-only thing.”

“Go on….” She turned her body to face him, eyes glued to his handsome face.

“I want to be with you like that again. I want more than just that night Y/n. It's driving me mad. I want you so fucking bad.” He said waiting for a response, nervous.

She could tell he was high, but she could also tell he was telling the truth. He didn’t tend to lie when he was high. “Like friends with benefits?”

“Yeah sure….only if you want to though. I got the impression that you regretted the other night, but if there’s even the slightest chance you might want this. I need to know. If you don’t, well, at least I’ll know. It’s the not knowing that’s making me crazy, Love.”

She put her hand on top of his giving it a squeeze. “I don’t regret it, H. How could I regret you? I just- I don’t know how I’m supposed to be around you now.”

He laughed a short laugh leaning into her side. “Just be yourself Y/n.”

“Easier said than done.”

He just shook his head at her. 

“It’s a deal.”

Harry’s head snapped over, eyes wide and heart pounding so loud he could hear it in his ears. “What?”

She laughed, throwing her head back. “I want to. I really do, but you know we can’t do anything tonight, right?”

His smile quickly turned into a big pout. Hair falling over his eyes. “What? Why?”

“You are unbelievably high. Look at those pupils!” She jested hands resting on his cheeks as she looked into his eyes. There was hardly any green left in them.

“They always get like that when I’m with you.” He leaned closer to show her them. The green had been swallowed by black, his long eyelashes fluttering. His eyelids had gone all swollen from smoking. 

She rolled her eyes at him pushing his head gently away. “Shut up. You really are terribly charming. It’s annoying Harold, you know that?”

“Why’s that?” He smiled hands rubbing her thighs. Her soft plump skin was soothing to play with. His hands were calloused but still soft against her.

“I feel like one of your fangirls. Seriously. Speaking of which, we better keep this a secret shouldn’t we?” She put her legs to rest on his lap. His hand stroked her shin gently, relaxing into the couch. He leaned back against the couch, feeling calm.

He cocked his head. “Why?”

“You’re a rockstar. I’m just some random from Holmes Chapel. I reckon your fans will go crazy.”

He frowned. “They know who you are already but just for our privacy, I think so. It’s hard being under the spotlight. I don’t want your privacy taken from you just because of me. People who I’m seeing or any girl really get a lot of hate, I don’t want that to happen to you.”

She nodded, letting silence fill the space.

“Can I eat you out now?” He said abruptly. 

She laughed in shock her face turning bright red as she laughed loudly. “No.”

He pouted like a little kid throwing a tantrum. “I just wanna taste you.”

He knew how to get her all riled up. She hated it, he really was good at everything he did. Proving all previous fantasies to be correct.

“Harry, we can’t. It’d be taking advantage.” She replied, knowing she wanted him more than anything right now.

“Of who? Me? It doesn’t matter how sober, drunk, or high I am Y/n ’m still gonna’ want to eat yeh' out so bad.”

She laughed shyly getting up. She had never been so openly wanted, he made her feel sexy. It was a strange feeling because her whole life she had been told she was anything but. Especially because she'd gone this long being a virgin. “Let’s just sleep. Maybe when your sober, okay?”

He pouted again, grabbing her extended hand as she helped him find her room. His arms wrapped around her shoulders across her chest as he followed, feet heavy on the rug.

Her bedroom was chilly when they stepped inside. He clung to her for a moment his nose brushing against her neck, lips grazing her skin. “S’cold in here.”

“Yeah.” She replied, feeling goosebumps arise. She didn’t know if it was the cold or Harry who made her feel that way. 

He began to take off his clothes until he was just in boxers she was gonna offer him some clothes but he didn’t seem to care about being naked near her.

She stared at the art that was his body. She hadn’t had much chance to ogle him when they were together last. She noticed the new tattoos, itching to touch them, and ask about them but she refrained.

The tanned skin and rippling muscles, the whisps of hair on his chest, the snail trail on his navel. He was just fucking gorgeous.

“You're staring.” He said. She chose to ignore him, which only made him laugh at her.

She lifted the blankets for him. They were different sheets from last time. These were pink and Harry recognised them from when they were roommates. 

“In you get.”

He jumped in childishly and she joined him. 

Her window was slightly ajar so they could hear the rain bucketing down, it was loud but peaceful. He curled into her back. His hand slid onto her stomach underneath her shirt as he pressed her closer to him, soaking up her warmth.

“G’night, love.”

“Night Harry. Sweet dreams.” She replied.

He kissed her neck. “Trust me, they will be very sweet.” 

Harry was an early riser, he always had been. He loved the mornings. Even when they were roommates and he’d been out partying he’d still get up earlier than Y/n. She on the other hand hated mornings, she always got so grumpy and if he could he avoided waking her up at all costs. 

Even after his late night yesterday, he was still the first up of them both. It was around half past six, and the rain was still heavy and coming down. He sighed peacefully, Y/n was still curled up at his side soft breaths escaping her mouth. She looked so peaceful in his arms.

They’d barely moved all night, the last thing he remembered was her by his side tracing his tattoos with her fingers. Her leg was thrown over his hips and her arms were still clinging to his body. He could stay like this forever. He was kind of foggy after last night, he’d forgotten he’d come all the way over here, but it was a pleasant surprise to have her there next to him.

She moved quite a bit in her sleep, he’d always known that about her. She began to squirm a bit shifting her hips against his side, thigh rubbing over his boxers. “Mm.” She groaned, and he watched her to see if she was awake. But nothing. 

She kept wriggling against him, and against his own will, he felt his boxers grow tighter. He sighed, holding in a laugh at the thought of last night. It’s honestly the only thing that had been on his mind for days, which probably made him sound like a horny old bastard, but he’d never felt like that before except with Y/n. All she’d done was give him a blowjob and he’d had enough of those to know how it goes.

He’d even started a song about this feeling. It was in the works, but he had to laugh at himself. It was about the female orgasm. Or as he called it “the sweetness in life.” He really couldn’t help but let his mind wander to the idea once again. 

His tongue, her. How perfect would it be? Like art being made.

He felt her start to make more noise beside him, pulling him out of his filthy thoughts. 

“H?” She whispered groggily, voice hoarse. 

He looked down. “Hi, petal.”

She rumbled a groan, stretching her arms out her shirt riding up revealing her tummy. “What time is it?” He reminded her of a cat, all stretched out like that.

“I dunno, early though. Probably sixish.” He replied, hand rubbing her back. “How’d you sleep?”

“I can’t focus on what you just said when your dicks hard sticking into me,” She teased, “Can you start again?”

He laughed cheeks going a bit pink. “Sorry, I would’ve moved you but you are not the happiest in the mornings, I wanted to keep my head from being bitten off.”

She rolled her eyes ignoring that comment. “How long have you been awake?”

“A little while.” His eyes hadn’t moved off her face the entire time. 

“How’d you sleep?”

He pulled her closer, one hand on her lower back and the other on her thigh. She could really feel him now. It made this whole thing seem real. This was the first time they’d been like this when they were sober. Her confidence felt smaller and weaker. The tequila was what gave her the courage to get with him in the first place. 

“Perfectly.”

She just nodded trying not to focus on his achingly hard cock sticking into her. The feel of him already had her giddy. “Good. Can I make you a tea or coffee? You hungry?”

She was about to get up but he grabbed her. “‘M ravenous,”

She innocently started to list off what she had for food in her flat. “Well I have some toast, I can make pancakes, and I have cheerios—”

“You’re so cute, Y/n.”

She cocked her head. “Uh- Thanks?”

He kissed her hairline, “I haven’t forgotten our conversation from last night. Have you?”

She blushed, finally realising what he was insinuating. “No. How could I forget that?”

“Can I kiss you?”

She nodded, moving her face close to his, and their noses brushed softly.

As he leaned forward she could feel his warm breath on her face. He pecked her lips softly at first pulling back to kiss her nose too, then one of her rosy cheeks. Before finally placing his lips on hers firmer this time. It was deep and slow, with no urgency in it. He wanted to take his time and enjoy waking up with such an opportunity in front of him. 

He wanted her like this every morning. 

Y/n knew she’d never had a boyfriend let alone a friends-with-benefits before this. The most she’d done is kiss a few dates or strangers in a bar. But for some reason, she felt this was rather intimate for two people who claimed to be just friends who have just sex.

What drew the line between friends who are fucking and people dating? Is the fact they slept together and cuddled up all night something more than friends do? Or is it all part of this whole deal they had, did that just come with it? She had no idea, and she wondered if Harry was like this with everyone he slept with casually. She had to admit sometimes she got sad when she saw how he made everyone feel special. It made her feel just like any other girl he’d been with. When he was far from anything she’d ever experienced and honestly she’d probably compare every other boy to him after this.

That’s what scared her. 

And then of course she thought that if she wasn’t so inexperienced maybe she’d be calmer about the whole casual thing. But Y/n didn’t do casual. She was all or nothing. But if Harry wanted casual she’d do it. She’d do more for him than she cared to admit.

The kiss grew fierier and that felt more like the first time they were together — it was all tongues and teeth. He began to roll on top of her, pressing his hard cock against her and her yearning for him grew even stronger. She honestly thought herself pathetic for how wet he made her, they’d done practically nothing and already her heart was beating fast, her chest heaving against his.

His hands slid up under her shirt massaging her tits gently, as he began to kiss her neck. The hickey he’d left last had faded now which gave him the motivation to do another and who was she to tell him no? Her hands were in his hair massaging him as she sighed contently. Letting out moans every few seconds from the pleasure his touch brought.

How did he already know her body so well? It was like he could read her mind. And yet every move he made seemed so effortless. 

“Take it off.” Y/n sighed gesturing to her shirt. Harry didn’t need to be told twice, he ripped it off and throwing somewhere neither cared to look as his mouth roamed along the peaks of her tits, nipples suddenly hard. Her back arched up to his hot, wet mouth.

His tongue swiped along them and Y/n whined needily, her hands now on his shoulders as her hips bucked up. He sucked just below one of them, leaving a mark Y/n knew she’d touch whenever she thought of him after this. His hands were on her waist fiddling with the waistband of her very small shorts. He kissed down her stomach and on her hip tattoo. 

“When’d ya’ get this lil’ number?” He asked, moving the shorts to reveal a small yet noticeable tattoo. It was a little moth kind of similar to the one on Harry but smaller. 

“I got it with Daisy on a whim one night. I actually used you as inspiration. I didn’t know what else to get. I’ve always loved your tattoos.”

His heart swelled and he kissed it. “It’s sexy.” She smiled, face all pink, eyes soft. 

“Can I touch you, Harry?”

He shook his head and she frowned confused. “Why not?”

“Because I want this to be about you.” He replied. 

She pouted at him reaching for his hand. 

“Don’t give me that, be good f’me and let me make y’feel good Petal.” He said tapping it away.

“Okay, I’ll be good.”

He said. “Atta girl.” 

She felt her stomach twist in want. “You can take those off too.”

So he did. He had an inkling she hadn’t any undies under there and his theory was proven correct. 

“Sorry I didn’t shave, I didn’t know this would happen.” He looked up at her, his fingertips gliding up her inner thigh. 

“Don’t be silly, Y/n.”

Harry constantly raised her standards every second. 

“Don’t boys get repulsed by hair?” She asked. 

He laughed staring right at her dripping hole, his eyes looked hungry, lips slightly parted. “Yeah exactly, boys. Not real men. I firmly believe men who care don’t actually like pussy. I love pussy, what’s a little hair anyway?”

“I guess m’ just nervous, H.” She replied, looking away. 

He stopped, hands freezing. “D’ya want me to stop?”

Her hands moved from her stomach to his cheeks, stubble grazing her hands. “No,” She said faster than she had wanted to, which actually made him smirk. “I just- What if I do it wrong?”

“How can you do anything wrong? You just have to let me take care of you. Relax, Love. It’s just me.”

“Just Harry,” She confirmed and he kissed her thigh. She felt the stubble graze her and felt her pussy throb deeply. She was yearning for him. 

“Tell me if y’want me to stop, okay?” 

She nodded. “I will.”

He lifted her legs up placing them on his muscular shoulders, pulling her close by her hips. Every single touch and movement of his was teasing and getting her so worked up she was about ready to beg him for it. His breath was making her squirm against his face when he finally decided to kiss her puffy clit which was swollen in arousal. She was taken back to New Year’s when she kissed the tip of his throbbing dick. All pink and slick.

She let out a heavy breath shutting her eyes. One of his hands found hers and she held it, stroking her thumb over his knuckles in encouragement because she was worried her voice would be too shaky. Without further hesitation, his warm tongue lapped up all the wetness dripping down her pretty pussy. 

She whimpered. Was it supposed to feel this good?

He started to suck on her clit, lapping it up over and over. The noise of what he was doing to her was pure filth. Her hand was in his hair tugging at it as she cried out. She tried to stop her hips from squirming but it felt so good. 

“Fuck, Harry.” She said letting out a shakey breath when his tongue started licking her wet hole. 

She gave his hair a particular rough tug and he grunted against her. The vibrations made her whine.

She felt his free hand move against her pussy fingertips tracing up his spit and her slick. Before he began to tease her some more. The tip of his middle finger slid in ever so slightly, her hips leaning into the touch before he pulled away again. He was still harshly sucking her clit, and Y/n couldn’t help but whimper. 

“Harry, please.”

He looked up at her from his position. His eyes met hers as he greedily lapped her up. His finger went in slightly further reaching halfway before he pulled away again. She threw her head back in defeat. He wanted her to beg. 

“Please, H. I want you so bad.” She said, shutting her eyes. 

She felt him pull back for a brief second. “These kinds of things can’t be rushed, Babe.”

She sighed, he was taking his time with her, enjoying every sound that came from her swollen lips. The noise of her slick, dripping pussy against his mouth. The sweet tangy taste of her. Those hands of hers that ran through his hair and tugged when he did something particularly good. He was going to make sure she was satisfied.

He went straight back to it. This time his finger went all the way, knuckle deep, as he grazed that spot that made her scream. He heard her whisper, “Fucking hell.”

He pulled his finger out again. His tongue and lips still working hard against her puffy sensitive clit. She couldn’t contain her moans. They turned on Harry so much that every few seconds he found himself humping against the bed for some relief. 

Her hips bucked up, her thighs squeezing his head unintentionally. He made her so riled up she could barely control her body. Her legs were already shaking from the pleasure. 

When his finger slipped in the next time it stayed. She sighed contently as he began to thrust against her walls that tightened around him every few seconds. His rhythm wasn’t fast or sloppy it was slow but hard. A steady rhythm. They curled inside her and each time he hit that spongey spot and sucked her clit just right her eyes rolled back in her head. 

“Harry,” She begin to chant like a mantra over and over which only egged him on more and more.

She could feel her stomach begin to tighten, and her hands came up to play with her tits. Kneading them and pinching her nipples. The wave of her orgasm snuck up on her, her back arching and her hands finding Harry’s free hand on her thigh to squeeze in a warning.

“Fuck! I’m cumming!” She cried out. 

Harry felt her clench like a vice on his fingers as she got wetter and wetter. He felt it drip down his wrist as she whimpered. Her thighs clenched against his wrist as she writhed uncontrollably beneath him. His tongue and finger didn’t stop though. He looked up through hooded eyes at her gorgeous face. 

Her hair was fanned out above her head, tossed back, mouth agape in an o shape, and her cheeks were all flushed and pink. Her eyes rolled back as she screamed out. “Ah! Fuck!”

When she started to come down from the peak of her orgasm Harry continued helping her ride it out. She thought he would stop, she was so whimpery and sensitive.

“Got another one in ya’?” He asked, looking up. 

“Maybe.”

That was enough for him to keep going. He slipped another finger inside her, he started speeding up now. 

“Look at you, so good f’me.” He said, his voice all gravelly.

She whimpered pathetically, squirming. Already feeling a building in her stomach.

“All spread out, ruined, taking me like a good girl. Such a good girl.” Y/n clenched against his fingers at that comment.

“Jesus, Harry. You’ll be, ah, the death of me.” She replied. 

He just laughed at her. Starting to speed up his thrusts.

Y/n let her eyes flutter shut as she felt her second orgasm start to wash over her and she sighed. This time it felt even more intense than the first, her toes curled and her hands gripped the sheets. She felt a wild deep sensation inside her. “Oh, god. ‘M cumming.”

It washed through her entire body, pure pleasure overcoming her. When she opened her eyes she saw these black spots, her hearing stopped for a second and she let out a loud mewling carnal whimper. Harry was mesmerised by the sight in front of him. If he could he would do this all day.

When her body went limp he slowly pulled his fingers out and she suddenly felt so empty. 

“You okay?” He asked softly.

She opened her eyes, naked chest heaving. “Your…tongue…fuck.”

He giggled. 

“Kiss me, please.”

He placed a peck on her lips, brushing some hair from her face. 

“Thank you.” She whispered, fingers brushing his jaw. 

“No, thank you, Y/n. Been dyin’ to do that for weeks.”

thanks for reading! follow to see a part three! xx if you enjoyed this feel free to check out my masterlist here! xx feel free to request me too!

[the-s1lly-corner]

Hii! Idk if you've ever done something similar, but what do you think about TADC x Skater! Reader? Like, Reader always have their skates on, like it's a part of their digital costume or smth. And i really mean ALWAYS. Someone spilled water on the floor? Reader slips down. They go on an adventure and a part of the floor is inclined? (Like a hill for example) There goes reader down the hill. I think it would be pretty funny lol

Btw, i really love your page, keep it up and don't overwork yourself

TADC cast x rollerskater!reader

Anon I am so so so sorry !! I dont know if I personally got jumbled up or my inbox has been wonky silly goofy or I just got thrown off because of so many people sending stuff in, but I also missed this as well as some other requests 😭😭

This one may be a little short since I've never skated <\3

Written this as more platonic leaning !

CAINE:

Probably poofs himself his own rollerskates, literally the only time you see him on the ground and it's so weird to look at. You guys both slip and fall because bubble wiped themselves across the floor or something

Obviously leads to bubble getting popped

Honestly seeing caine struggle to keep steady while using the rollerskates is... very funny.. look at his lil legs wobble (tell anyone and he will tilt the ground of the next IHA)

POMNI:

Honestly she would probably slip on the floor too if its wet or has marbles. She looks like she would comically fall over, with her legs flinging straight up into the air before plopping down

Looks at you confused as you visibly try to calculate how fast this one little slope will make you go, she probably forgets you have skater feet in the beginning

Subconsciously tries to grab and stop you when you start rolling, but because shes so small you just drag her with you

Theres that squeaky noise as shes being dragged across the floor

Yk the sound

JAX:

Throws marbles on the floor as well as other things that can make you stumble or slip... probably soaps up the floor.. thank god hes just a circus rmemeber and not like, a ringmaster... this dude would tolt the floor in so many different angles just to fuck with you... thankfully, he cant do that!

Though in another timeline... perhaps you werent so lucky...

Not much to be said here, with the bit with zooble in the pilot (the arm thing), jax is more than ready to use peoples unique digital qualities to please him or mess with them, and you being his friend only makes you slightly less likely to be messed with

RAGATHA:

Keeps a hand on your shoulder when she notices the floor is tilted, tends to walk with you while holding your shoulder still. She can only imagine what it's like to be s victim of slopes.. it would drive her nuts.. as long as shes around shes going to do her damndest to make sure you dont roll away or slip... unless jax literally throws marbles in front of you two at the very last second because who can predict that..?

In any case where theres an IHA with a DEEP slope I think she just might resort to carrying you so you dont go FLYING down

ZOOBLE:

Okay you guys might not have the same issues but they can relate to you in the jax department, with him using your qualities to his advantage. Its absolute hell.. I think it would be this shared thing that leads to you guys building a relationship in the first place

That one meme where it's two people at the bar and they overhear each other saying "I hate (x)" then they start making out

Thats you guys ranting about the bunny/j

Offered you some parts before realizing that you cant swap out your limbs like they can

"Ah, bummer"

KINGER:

Has probably asked you why you dont just take them off when you vent to him about jax putting marbles on the floor. Kind of sounds like when people say shit such as "oh you're depressed? Just cheer up!" But like, kinger says it in a genuinely.. not malicious or tone deaf way.. like I dontt think he knows, or perhaps he thinks you're like zooble with detachable limbs and you have another pair of feet hanging around somewhere

Gives a soft "oh.. " when you demonstrate that they are attatched to you

Offers to let you strap pillows to yourself to soften any blows when you fall, let's you have his softest and thickest pillows... what do you mean it throws off your balance...?

GANGLE:

You have probably accidentally rammed into her after misjudging how steep a hill on the ground was

Good news! She stopped your momentum!

Bad news, shes all tangled up in your skates (owie!) And her comedy mask is broken (oh no!)

Please be careful getting her out. We don't want her ribbons to tear or get damaged, we cant have our girl start fraying!

[teddybeartoji]

me and toji me and toji me and tojiiiiiiii...

we started out as neighbors but it took us like three months to even propely meet lmao,, it takes me a while to get used to new places so when i first moved in i just stayed at home like a lot. a lot a lot. i literally only left to go to the grocery store and then to the park down the street and that's it. and toji is a big homebody too, so he didn't go out all that much either, just work and then the bar with a friend every once in a while. we just didn't happen to move at the same time, despite living right next to each other.

after about a month, i found myself a third place and slowly but surely grew more and more comfortable there – the cinema (nobody is surprised). i always liked to go during the day, as early as i could, just to make sure that there wouldn't be too many people. always in the last row, always in the middle seat. this is the mickey way. anyway, after creating a bit of a routine for myself, i felt more free to observe my surrounding some more too. felt more comfortable to start people watching. and that's when i saw him. mostly dressed in darker clothes, hoodies and big jackets. sometimes with a cap on, sometimes without it. it's not like he was always always there at the same time as me but when he was, he always sat in the last row but instead of fighting for the middle seat, he always sat at the very end of the row. obviously i thought he looked very handsome – we had made eye-contact a few times while buying popcorn by accident and let me tell you, that was enough to have my heart racing ok i am very weak. but i'm not bold enough to strike up a conversation like that so stolen glances and shared movie experiences were all we had. we btw have a very similar taste in films so we did end up seeing each other a lot there lmao

aaaanyway i just had a silly little cinema crush but never did anything abt it bc i'm a pussy ok😔😔 (he's literally the same). okay but so, one day i was coming home from whereever, just stepped into the elevator when a hand stopped the doors and HE appeared. i was very confused. he.. looked confused too lmao,, but now........ loookkkk.... no matter how handsome he is..... he's still a stranger, and a man too at that. a man who seems to be where i am multiple times a week and is now suddenly where i live. yes, i freaked the fuck out okay. don't judge me. he didn't press a floor button either yk so i really did start to spiral over the fact that maybe he's stalking me or smth..... and he saw that. he saw me tense up and he isn't stupid – he knows he's a tough big guy and it did seem like he could've been stalking me. so he immediately backed away a bit, trying to make himself smaller bc he obviously didn't want to make me any more uncomfortable. and then he just blurted out with his raspy voice that he lives here. it definitely cracked the tension a bit. he cleared his throat and slowly pointed at the floor buttons, saying that he lives on the same floor (btw i need everybody to know that he has a bit of an accent in my head it's very very important to me he speaks english very well but his accent still shines through and i love it very very much<33333). he even showed me his keys lmao and i did feel way more safe after that buuut we still didn't really introduce each other or anything. i guess the air still felt just a bit weird.. the doors opened and we both walked to out apartments in silence (it wasn't actually awkward or anything though it was just . silence) and then looked at each other with silly faces when we realized we literally live Right next to each other lmao that was funny. i just said that i moved in like two months ago and that was it. we went our seperate ways.

for a day.

bc you have no idea.. how awful i felt abt that elevator thing. oooooooh my god. IT'S NOT HIS FAULT HE'S SO BIG SO IT'S SO MEAN FOR ME TO ASSUME THAT HE'S SOME AXE MURDERED YK well it isn't but i still felt really really bad esp since he tried to immediately make me feel more comfortable and tried to reassure me that he was not, in fact, stalking me lmao but yeah idk it just weighed really heavily on me i couldn't help but keep thinking abt it soooo i ended up baking a batch of brownies the very next day. and i went to his door (still in my hello kitty pyjama pants mind you)(i forgot to change them) aaand then started rambling and STUTTERING BTWW while apologizing and he just stood there like ???? like he didn't even understand why i was apologizing in the first place lmao he felt it was a very understandable for me to have that fear and to think the way i was thinking (he actually felt a bit bad abt the whole thing inside too he just didn't really know how to express it). aaaanyway so he was just there staring at me with like a veeery faint smile bc at a point it got a bit ridiculous bc i really did start just rambling abt the whole thing lmao it was uhhh just a bit embarrassing (the fact that he's hot didn't help either thank you very much). he thought it was cute how i was there trying to apologize for smth that he should've been apologizing for himself lmao he tried to say no to the brownies at first and i shoved them at him so hard they all almost fell.. aaand i think that's exactly where he decided that hm. mickey . yes weird little creature i am intrigued i want to know more yk?

btw we still didn't exchange numbers or anything at that point, that happened later after i came knocking at his door at twelve am bc there was a big spider in my room but i'll talk abt that some other time:33333333 thank you for reading abt the miji lore i love you . and i love him. sooooso much he means the world to me<3333333333333333

[dark-and-kawaii]

love knowing that you’re into bg3 like so many of us Kiwi! Did you love all the romance options or do you wish we could’ve had others because have you seen Dammon and Raphael! Glad to have you back with us btw!

AWHHHHH STOP!!!! You’re going to make me cry! It’s so good to be back on here, honestly!!! Now to answer your lovely question!!!

I was honestly happy at first but the more I played the game the more I saw the potential in adding other characters as romance options…

𝓩𝓮𝓿𝓵𝓸𝓻:

Like, I fell in love with Zevlor the moment I met him and I honestly would’ve picked him over Astarion for my first playthrough if he was an option -yeah yeah I know unpopular opinion.

But as I continued I was so confused as to why he wasn’t available for us because if you don’t go Minthara’s route then he would’ve been the perfect substitute because HELLOOOOO PALADIN!!!!

Not to mention during act two that would’ve been a perfect redemption ark for him, like there was SO MUCH POTENTIAL!!! Like he literally needed a hug after all the shit he’s been through and we weren’t able to grant him that…

He’s been with us since Act one… Up until the end he was with me. So I ask Larian, why wasn’t I allowed to travel and bed with this man!?

Grinds my gears man!!! I’m trying not to spoil too much in case someone hasn’t played yet.

𝓓𝓪𝓶𝓶𝓸𝓷:

Okay okay okay, as for Dammon…. Yeah no, I fucked up bad with him my first play through… uhhhhh he kinda died when the tieflings and I attacked the Druids 🥲 Oops. But during my second run I realized my mistake and he’s very much alive right now 😂!!!

With Dammon I don’t necessarily want him for myself, but rather for Karlach. I ship those two so damn hard it’s unreal!!! He loves her so much, you can just tell 🥹

And when he tells her she’s very touchable, I always kick my feet and giggle!!! Adorable to the max!

𝓡𝓪𝓹𝓱𝓪𝓮𝓵:

-Gods, just look at him… I love him so much UGHHH!!!-

Now as for our beautiful, smug, elegant cambion, Raphael… OOOOOF don’t get me started because the mouse would’ve pounced on the cat. I LOVE, and I do mean LOVE Raphael. Everything about him I just adore, and again SO MUCH POTENTIAL.

If you go his route there’s no reason why you shouldn’t be able to romance him. Like if you let Haarlep use you and you leave house of hope it indicates that Raphael is doing the nasty with Haarlep in your form once you leave. There’s clearly something there!!! So why can’t we!? I feel they left it during his ending that there might be a dlc for him, I hope, maybe… Also can we all agree that Raphael would’ve been another great villain ending with Tav???

The relationship between Tav and Raphael in game is already so interesting, and if you break into the house of hope to steal from him he looks extremely hurt that you betrayed him. Not to mention he’s like the only one who’s actually upfront with you, I don’t feel like he really hid anything unless you’re dense -no offense-.

Another thing, just because Haarlep says Raphael is bad in bed doesn’t mean he actually is. I feel a lot of individuals forget what Haarlep is 😂 sex is basically their thing.

Not to mention his little helper is basically always saying “he can’t stop talking about you.”

Plus, hold on, we can romance Mizora but not him… Nah!!!

𝓖𝓸𝓻𝓽𝓪𝓼𝓱:

A lot of people have said Gortash, which at first I didn’t really understand but that’s because I was a huge simp for Karlach and if you’ve played you know…

However the more I play and the more I read into I do understand. He could’ve used a nice redemption after everything he’s been through. He was a pawn, someone to be used, and honestly that was his whole life. So it would’ve been nice if Tav was an option for him.

I feel they could’ve had two endings for him and Tav, a good and a bad. Good being his redemption where Tav opens his eyes like what Tav did for Astarion and then the Bad obviously they rule together.

I feel Larian made a lot of great choices but I also feel they missed a lot of potential, which hopefully they continue to listen to their audience and add more routes in the future. So far they have been so one can hope. I also feel like all of these characters were left to where they could be potentially added later down the road. Fingers crossed!!!

- 𝓛𝓸𝓿𝓮 𝓚𝓲𝔀𝓲

[tubatwo]

Soft Taehyun thought..

You had a hard day at work and as soon as you walked into your shared apartment and you saw Taehyun you burst into tears waffling about how hard your day was inbetween sobs and hes just pulled you to him and sat you on his lap as you cry into his neck and hes just rubbing your back and stroking your hair while he whispers “everything is gonna be okay honey…” , “shhh its okay tomorrow will be better..” or like “take the day off tomorrow..” or just asking if he should go get your favourite snacks from the store and you two can cuddle watching your favourite movie

(sorry its long)

oh my god taehyun comfort prompts make me so so soft I would literally do anything to hug him!!! he cares so much about his loved ones and he’s so protective (the way he’s possessive over kai and doesn’t like seeing him cry.. brb gonna lay on the floor and just die)

can I just make this even more heart wrenching and suggest if it was his first time seeing you cry.. obviously crying in front of someone is kinda awkward and your relationship was still somewhat fresh. you weren’t sure how taehyun would react and you also didn’t want to make him uncomfortable. but the day just sucked so badly!!!! no matter how good you were at brushing things off, there were just so many things that you couldn’t ignore :( the only thing you wanted to do was go home and see your boyfriend.

and when you finally see him, you can’t help but let out everything you were holding in. the world was harsh and nasty, but taehyun was everything but that. he was a reminder that love and light still existed.

“b-baby?” he froze for a second before standing up quickly, rushing over to your shaking figure by the door. “are you okay? what happened?” the only thing on his mind at this point is 1. what happened 2. why it happened and 3. whose ass does he have to beat lmao

“i’m s-sorry,” you let out in between hiccups, “t-today was so horrible, i’m really s-sorry.”

“oh honey..” he whispers, softly guiding you to the couch where he then pulls you onto his lap. “why are you apologizing, hm?”

“don’t wanna ruin the mood.. feel stupid for crying.” you confess.

taehyun pulls your head into his neck as you cry harder, feeling frustrated from the day and now for ruining your boyfriend’s mood. little do you know that he’s grateful. he’s grateful that you came to him and you feel safe enough to give him all of you, including your emotions.

“shhh.. you’re not ruining anything, sweetheart. and you shouldn’t feel stupid. I love you, you know?” your sobs die down as you become mesmerized by your boyfriend’s voice right by your ears, his hands slowly caressing your back. “i’m right here, okay? everything’s okay now.. I got you..”

and that was all you needed. you knew that as long as you had him then you would be okay. everything would be alright. you finally lift your head up to meet his eyes. he chuckles softly at how cute you look, tears and all </333

“my sweet baby..” he coos, using his sleeve to endearingly wipe the tears off your cheeks. “take the day off tomorrow, yeah? you deserve a break.”

and before you could even protest he was already cutting you off. “and take this.” he quickly unlocks his phone and taps a few buttons before handing it to you. you tilt your head in confusion, not fully understanding what he’s asking you.

“your instacart order. add any snacks you want. the only thing you need to worry your pretty little head about tonight are snacks, movies, and cuddles.”

ASKSKDKD ok can you tell i’m getting carried away I just love him so much (´•ω���̥`) and don’t apologize for making it long!!! the more details you guys give the easier it is to imagine the scene in my head

(btw if you were having a hard day and that inspired this ask I hope your day is better!!!)

soft hours open!

[bolilloquemad0]

While talking with my dear friend @i-like-cats-and-stars36, he came with a crack idea. Damian's love language is free cats. If he likes you enough, or considers you as part of the family, he would gift you a cat that is personally selected.

I, cat lover, obviously said that yes, that's him. 100% Damian behavior. So when the question of what type of cats would Damian give to his family, I went a bit frantic to be honest 😔👊. And that ended in a list of cats that suddenly got to powerful and now we have, kind of, an Au for your entertainment.

We called it: Picking up Strays.

(This family has a problem, dear god)

So, buckle up Batfam lovers. I'm not kidding. (Btw, credits to all the lovely people who took pics of their cats and ended in pinterest, you're life saviors)

LET'S BEGIN (this is only pt 1, the rest of the family will come soon) (pt2 is up now!)

Dick

The first person I feel he would give a cat to is Dick, we all know why. Since Dick already has Haley and she is the precious energetic baby she is, I feel like Damian would give him a more relaxed cat. So maybe a 5 years old cat could fit, they're not as crazy as the young ones (my cat is nearly five years old and he only knows the activity of sleeping) and probably they could handle Haley without problems.

So I landed with this; a gray mixed between tabby and russian blue with blue eyes, obviously. Is a male and 5 years old. He fits the aesthetic.

Dick arrives at his loft in Bludhäven one night, probably after his shift, to find a cat calmly sleeping on his couch next to a, now awake, Haley. There's food, a bed, some toys, sand, and a note. Something something I know you would take good care of him something something.

Dick is clearly confused, "Damian, wtf are you doing in Blud?!", but upon seeing the cat on his couch (that now was looking at him) Dick just, well, he has a cat now.

He calls the cat Zbor (romani for fly or flying) and Dick's phone is full with how many photos and videos he takes of Zbor and Haley sleeping or hanging out. Zbor would occasionally smack Haley on the head while playing and Dick finds it utterly adorable. All his socials are full of Haley and Zbor.

Jason

Next is Jason. I'm a firm believer of the hc that Damian and Jason meet at the League, maybe they didn't bonded that much, but still knew eachother. So maybe Dami has a different kind of respect for Jason.

Jay ended with a cat by accident. Damian found this 1 month old baby, lost and hungry and probably hurt and Jason's place was the closest so he bringed the baby to him. At firts it was just for a few nights meanwhile Damian found her another place.

So this 1 month old moggies ends at the care of Jay. How many nights has to pass before Jason falls in love with her. Four? Six? A whole week? Wrong. Two nights. She yawns and falls asleep on top of Jason's jacket by accident and that's it.

Jay is a father now. Congratulations!

Later that week, when Damian goes for her Jason invents the most stupid reason for Damian to let her stay, surprisingly Dami doesn't insist, he's just like "Okay." The reality is that Damian's plan worked just fine.

He names her Cat. That's it. Cat. Everyone thinks he's pulling a Jonh Wick situation, and Jay rolls with it. Truth is (thanks Astro) that Cat is the short version for Catherine, as his mother. Jason never calls her Catherine when other people are around, but wait until he's alone in his room with Cat in his chest and Jason would scratch behind her ears while saying, "You're so beautiful, Catherine."

Cat, as she grows, becomes a chaotic good. I also feel like she would LOVE sleeping inside of Jason's shoes until she doesn't fit anymore. Lian and Cat would become best friends, and she would occasionally sleep on Lian's bed too.

Cass

Next is Cassandra. (This one is Astro's favorite). Cass comes back from a trip, probably, and the first thing Damian does is give her a black cat. Not any cat, a brainless stupid cat. Cass, eyes landing on yellow ones, and they have a connection.

Brainless eyes upon seeing Cass (with the tongue out): Mother.

Cass, looking at her cat: Stupid. No brain. Lover her.

Cass names her Blob. Is a british shorthair of 2 years old and likes to headbutt Cass. Have you seen those special bags for chihuahuas?, Cass gets one for Blob, to take her in all of her trips like the spoiled princess she is.

(Credits of the photos and fanart to Astro ♡)

Blob follows Cass blindly everywhere. This often ends with her getting lost on some street meowing loudly until Cass finds her and carries her home calling her stupid affectionally all the way.

Blob is probably the must unproblematic cat of all of them, but I don't recommend leaving her without supervision.

Bruce

When Bruce gets his cat, the rest of the family already has the idea of why Damian suddenly is giving cats to everyone. Dick cried for two hours knowing he was the first.

Anyway, with Bruce's cat is a bit more difficult. The grey turkish angora Damian gets to rescue has been a stray for a long long time. He's 6-7 years old and fights. He doesn't trust humans and Damian has a big scratch in the cheek to prove it with more adding up. No one understands why he brings him to the manor, but Damian is determined.

A few days passes and the old cat finally seems to settle, but he's still wary of them. Nevertheless, Damian claims that the cat is Bruce's. He argues, he doesn't want a cat, he doesn't need one. In the end, Bruce treats the cat carefully. He doesn't know how to handle him nor exactly what to do.

Slowly, the cat seems more at peace at Bruce's side. The kids starts pestering him with a name but Bruce doesn't know. He doesn't know how to name things, by god's sake he named the Batcomputer. Dick jokes about Batcat as a name, you know, for the aesthetic and the Theme. Bruce turns them down while everyone laughs at him.

The problem is that the cat needs a name, he can't keep calling him The Cat and is not like Damian's constant glares makes everything better. So, for now he would call the cat Batcat. Just for now. Until he finds a better name.

He doesn't.

He never finds a better name. And all his children laughs at him. It's Batcat now.

+ Bonus story of Bruce and Batcat

One night, after a rough patrol, Bruce's arrives at his room and nothing feels quite real. Sitting in his bed, maybe a panic attack starts. Everything is too much. Bruce tries to calm himself but he just can't. Hw breathing becomes labored. A warm, heavy and soft something places himself on his lap, and slowly starts purring, Bruce puts his hand on the cat, slowly petting him. And as the purring grows he can finally calm himself enough to come back.

[cherry1sblog]

PART 2

PAIRING: Lee heeseung × fem!reader . a

GENRES:smut, fluff, bullying, alcohol,party,unprotect ed sex (rember to wrap your Willy so the out come won't be silly

WARNINGS there is bullying in this heeseung is basically a dick to y/n and nothing in this story is real!!! This is fan fiction and the way I write about heeseung is not the way I portray him as he's a person himself this is simply for entertainment only !!

SUMMARY:heeseung had always bullied you through your 3 years of Highschool but never let anyone touch you other then him and if he found out someone did that was the end of it you were basically marked as his toy that's until the summer of your junior year you had enough you were done with him always making fun of you and you hated the fact that after all he did I to you you still adored him and liked him but it dosent matter cause you wanted to leave your senior year with a banger so you were no longer your nerdy self still smart asf obvi but appearance wise different you got contacts new clothes thank god you guys didn't have a dress code and most importantly you spent all summer learning how to do your makeup..

RECAP….

y/n and sunghoon on the couch asleep "holy shit heeseung hyung is not gonna be happy" jungwon picked you up and ran with you on his back you being confused when jungwon locked his door and threw you on the bed *WHAT TH-

" jungwon covers your mouth muffling your yelling until you stoped "shut the fuck up unless you want to make heeseung hyung and sunghoon hyung hate eachother more right now " honestly you couldn't give a fuck less and if this made heeseung miserable then you had every reason not to care " why should I care on fact I actually don't mind going back ou " jungwon grabed your hand pinning you on the wall wtf is it with everyone pinning you on the wall " look I know heeseung hyung did fucked up shit and I know it's fucked up we didn't do anything but we all grow from our mistakes and plus now your like hot so please just shut the fuck up and well stay in here

————————————————————-

/the next day after all that//

You got home after sometime of being stuck with jungwon you were honestly so feed up with everthing at that point but being stuck with jungwon wasn’t too bad you got to knwo him actually as a person and the way he talked about heeseung made you actually see there is a diffrent side to heeseung getting lost in your thoughts you didn’t know that chu was talking to you “oh sorry chu I just have a lot on my mind rn” she looked at you with a smirk confused you looked at her “I bet you are having a lot on you mind scince you slept with Sunghoon “ afraid someone would hear you covers her mouth “chu first of all we did not sleep together second of all please don’t say that” you wind to her “okay oaky I’m sorry “ she wisperd “ but if you guys didn’t fuck what did you do “ obviously her not buying it “well I mean we actually just watched a movie “ chu was in disbelief “you telling me you spent that night at his house and didn’t fuck!” “Omg shut up chu “everyone now staring at you and her apologizing “speak of the devil” you turned around confused at chu it was heeseung jake and sunoo sunoo smiled happyily at you giving you a hug sunoo was normally like this even when people were rude to you he made really nice gestures making you at least happy one person back then didn’t totally hate you “hi y/nnieeee” avoiding heeseungs contact a bit embarrassed from What hapoend the last time you guys spoke “didn’t know you had a nickname other than doll y/n “ sunoo smacked his shoulder “cmon now hyung don’t be a dick”sunoo said defending you “what ever “ heeseung said walking away sunoo being left behind “oh btw y/n I was wondering if I could get your help with something “ nodding at him curios to what he could need your help with “I know you and heeseung aren’t best of buds but cause you help me plan his birthday par-“ you stopped him “hell no sunoo” “why not th-“ you get it that sunoos action didn’t mean to hurt you but why would you do anything to help him “please y/nnie “ sunoo made it so hard to say no “your lucky your pretty “ sunoo smiled happily “okay well I’m his party is next week and all of the boys are pitching in and I need your help with decorations “ nodding but you didn’t want heeseung to know you helped cause that would cause problems “sunoo just don’t tell heeseung I’m helping you plan this “ nodding and not questiong you “oh and chu would you mind going with Jake the day of to get drinks “ you could see chus eyes light up in mention of jake “ofc!” Sunoo thanked you guys and had left

//2 days later//

“Okay sunoo so we have all the Ballons ordered and the banners nikis and jungwon and gonna pick up the cakes Sunghoon sunoo getting all the food so we’re set “ being so tired staying up late at night to plan more things for heeseungs party even tho as much as you hated him you still put a lot of time in this for no reason you couldn’t exactly pin point why you were putting so much thought in it being worried he wouldn’t be happy with it…. anyways back to sunoo “yes everything looks perfect !” Being happy everything was set in place for Saturday “wait y/n have you chosen your outfit yet “ omg after picking out everything and setting it all up for heeseungs party you completely forgot to buy and outfit with only 1 day left before the party “oh shit” sunoo being confused “what’s wrong?omg you didn’t chose one out yet did you” you shook your head “okay well you should have some time tommorw right I can go shopping with you” you thanked that sunoo even reminded you or it would have been so bad “your a life savor sunoo ilysm “

//The next day//

Sunoo arrived at the mall but not alone he came with sunghoon you hadn’t talk scince that day so you too were a bit awkward sunghoon just standing there as sunoo ran up to hug you “sunghoon hyung are you broken” laughing a bit at what sunoo had said “what no” sunghoon being defensive you ended up greeting him by just waving as he waved back “okay!let’s go shopping “

You guys had gon into a dress store to find a dress for the party you wanted somthing simple not to much it still being a little awkward beetween you and sunghoon but you guys lightens the mood by just saying some jokes sunoo had handed you a dress scince you weren’t liking any that you chose and sunoo really had an eye for clothes showing them the white dress sunoo had chosen for you his and sunghoon mouth hanging open “y/n I think you broke sunghoon” you both started laughing as sunghoon was a bit embarrassed but you knew that this was the dress you were gonna chose

//DAY OF PARTTYYYYY//

After you and sunoo had spent all night and the morning of the party decorating at jakes house you finally had to go home and change tha fully the party was supposed to be a Suprise so you didn’t have to worry about heeseung seeing you…”hey y/n “ nudging you head at chu “what up “ she seemed like she was being held back by the question “e-even tho heeseung bullied you and none of his freinds did anything to stop him why are you still nice to them “ you yourself didn’t fully understand but as much as you say you hated heeseung you really well didn’t how could you hate him from the moment you saw him in middle school till now you could never get over his Bambi like eyes and you’ll never forget the first encounter you had with him either heeseung was super nice the first time you had met him he had accidently number into you the first day of 6th grade helping you pick up everything and apologizing but reassuring him that it was okay every year from that money on you guys always had the same class but 6th grade heeseung was much diffrent then heeseung now “I’m not really sure chu but I know that I don’t hate them and I can’t really blame the boys either at times they would tell heeseung he was doing to much or that it was enough and I thanked them for that it was never there fault “ nodding chus head understating you now and feeling simpathy for you “but chu that’s not important right now cause we’re gonna go party!”

//at the party //

Beomgyu had driven all of you to the party you walked in thrue the door and you were so proud of the decorations and that everyone loved them “holy shit y/n “ beomgyu said “I need you to be my party planner cause damn “ giggling you made your way to find the rest of the boys leaving you freind for a bit instead you ran into heeseung you rolled your eyes as he starred at you “cmon doll you can’t be rude to the birthday boy “ he walked closer to you “what ever happy birthday tho ig “ he just nodded surprised you said happy birthday to him at all jake and sunoo seeing you and going up to you and heeseung “y/nnieee!!” You hugged sunoo and Jake “do want a drink y/n? Chu got a pack of beer that you like” you nodded pushing thrue the crowed to go get a drink getting déjà vu as you saw sunghoon agian in the same place as last time “oh hey y/n” Sunghoon seeming a bit tipsy already “hey hoon are you drunk?” He shook his head “no not drunk but what ever you do do not drink jays punch” “noted” you said as you guys laughed he passed you a beer as “are you enjoying the party so far” he asked you saying it to you ear as the music was too loud nodding to him “do you wanna go dance?” You asked him being a flustered but agreeing as you two were dancing you had made eye contact with heeseung but he didn’t look away you were in a trans you didn’t even realize sunghoon was talking to you till you felt him pat hour back “hey are you okay?” He asked a bit concerned “yeah I’m good “you said as you look back to heeseungs spot as he smirked and left with a girl sunghoon noticed and looked in the same direction “don’t worry about heeseung “ he told you “I’m not dont worry” you saw him smile as you to continued dancing

//later in the party//

You saw heeseung with a girl making out you were staring so hard you were sure they’d be able to feel u you “yo y/n “Jake was talking to you now “you seem a bit to munch into heeseung making out with other girls “slaping jake for making that remark as he laughed “shut up Jake “ you rolled your eyes beomgyu laughing at his joke “ you two are so immature “ soobin added “I can’t belive you choosing sides “ “Jake hee not choosing sides he just has a brain” now you were laughing but still going back to heeseung every now n then but this time was different heeseung made eye contact with you and you had gotten flustered going outside on the balcony for some fresh air you were two into you thoughts you didn’t know heeseung standing behind you “you know y/n if you wanted to keep watching you should have tooken a picture “ being scared as he talked in you ear grabbing you wait being flustered at his comment and his gestures “what’s wrong doll you always have so much to say “ you turned around just to be caged into him “heeseung go away “ he tilted his head “why you don’t like this “ he came close to you neck sucking on your skin moving your neck to let him have more access but you knew it was wrong “no I’m not gonna be one of your quick fuckes “ you said as you pushed him back you could tell he was a bit drunk “why cause I’m not sunghoon? Are you now to good for anyone” you were a bit confused on why that even mattered “yk what heeseung you seem a bit drunk so I’m just gonna g-“ he grabed your arm and tugged you back the drink he had placed before down before he had it in his other hand but it got on your dress he himself was a bit upset he had gotten it on you dress and by now you were furios “why do you hate me so much! What have I ever done to you for you to hate me you can’t just fuck with my feelings heeseung” he was taken aback by your question “yk heeseung Even after all the times you hurt me I never hated you but you always hated me and still do I don’t know what I did but I don’t think I even deserve this “ tears coming in your eyes now he could see them even tho it was dark he get bad now “y/n I-“ “no heeseung save it I’m done with you bull shit have a nice night happy fucking birthday lee” and with that you stumbled and ran out the door realizing soobin was the one who had driven you so you had to walk home now.

//back in the party //

Part three will be out quickly I just couldn’t write on this page anymore for some reason tha my oh for waiting !!

[freestyle-crocodile-trashpile]

Dark

[A/n: Oh and just a BTW I've never played cod mw2 so if 8 get their personalities wrong that's why, I'm just going off of what I read p, including wiki]

Summary: The new guy is terrifying at night due to his size and speed

Type: Short scenario: Gaz X Male!Reader: Soap X Make!Reader: Alejandro X Male!Reader: Price X Male!Reader: Ghost X Male!Reader: Ruby X Male!Reader

Version: Cod Mw2

Gaz

He already gets scared easily so when you came in it got worst, more than expected so when one day when he woke up at night to get a drink, he clearly didn’t see you getting his water he heard you, well he didn’t know it was you obviously. But you never once thought you’d see a military soldier stop and turn around so scared in his life. But when he saw you towering over him, he calmed down and playfully slapped you. 

“My god you scared me.”

Ghost

You know you’re scary when you scare Ghost, The Ghost. Ghost doesn’t sleep when everyone else does so he was just thirsty. When he got to the kitchen, he looked around like usual, but somehow, he didn’t see you. When he was making tea, he heard you walking over to him. He didn’t do anything at first and waited for you to get closer. As soon as you were at arm’s length, he spun around and roundhouse-kicked you. When he saw you, he calmed down a bit.

“Don’t sneak up on me Soldier.”

Alejandro

Now Alejandro isn’t one to get scared, we know this, but you somehow did. Entering the kitchen late at night he was still really tired from the day prior, which is no surprise when you are in the military. So, since he was so tired, he didn’t care for his surroundings, so he clearly didn’t see you. Even when he opened the fridge and pulled out a yahoo chocolate milk, he didn’t even know when they got yahoos. He didn’t even close the fridge when he took a drink of the yahoo, while he was in mid-drink he turned around and saw you standing there causing him to almost choke on his drink. While he was coughing, he threw his cap at you, not wanting to spill his drink.

“¡Eres idiota! ¡No te acerques sigilosamente a mí, Dios mío!“

Ruby

Just like Alejandro, he was really tired and just didn’t process that you were in the room with him, but he didn’t care either way. Opening the fridge door, he looked around confused since his yahoo wasn’t there.  All of a sudden, he’s wide awake, moving everything around and throwing things out of the fridge. Now you’ve seen Ruby mad but not like this. Whipping around he jumped back when he saw you but that fear instantly disappeared. He grabbed the collar of your shirt and pulled you down since you were quite taller than him.

“¿¡BEBISTE MI YAHOO!? ¡¡¿EH?!! ¿¡FUISTE TÚ!?“

Price

He was actually about to go to bed but had to get a drink first, his cigars were making him thirsty. Grabbing his “number one dad” mug and filling it with water. As he slowly drank his water, still thinking about past events that happened this morning. For example, Soap and Ghost were having a training session when Gaz brought everyone drinks like he did in high school, and for the rest of the day, he was called water boy. Chuckling softly Price turned around, when he saw you he jumped hard. Gasping a bit after he inhaled his water he leaned on the sink and glared at you.

“Boy...Just wait for tomorrow.”

Soap

Now if anyone’s easy to scare, it’s soap. He may be amazing at his job and a really good fighter but my god does this boy jump. You could pat his shoulder anytime when he isn’t looking and he’ll jump like a cat when it sees a cucumber. So when he got up at night to get a drink of water he didn’t see you. His glasses weren’t on (i feel like soap secretly wears glasses but only at night and when he’s reading). He heard you but when he turned around he couldn't see you, so he stood there holding his cup of water just looking around terrified. When he finally saw you he punched you and ran completely leaving the cup of water behind, cause he saw you but didn’t see who you were.

“ GHOST!!! THERE’S A INUREDER”

(A/n: this was super fun to write honestly. I hope you enjoyed)

[bi-hop]

my thoughts on rgu ep 2

and we're back to watching rgu! my thoughts so far can be found here.

it's funny and cute how those girls fawn over utena. no further thoughts, I just enjoy when that happens in yuri

I was so fucking worried that Wakaba wouldn't want to talk to Utena anymore after All That. I think Utena did the duel for a good reason but it's not like Wakaba asked her to. but nope, that wasn't the point of all that. it's okay, girl, you're better than Saionji's abusive ass anyway

... is the student council a doomsday cult?

you'd think for a group trying to 'bring revolution to the world' or whatever, they'd be more comfortable with a chaos agent added to their game LMAOOO anyway I'm pretending I understand what the fuck is going on with the letters but I don't <3

current working theory: End of the World is a supernatural force guiding them to achieve ends on the material plane. source? I have none. do not tell me what's going on or I will scream at the top of my lungs and embarrass us all

I had the feeling Anthy would be in the dorm but her writing her name underneath Utena's because her placement was an afterthought is... cute... kinda heartwrenching...

also is Anthy meant to look like a housewife? they're really hammering home the patriarchal nature of engagement and marriage here, and we haven't even gotten to another duel

speaking of their situation... while Anthy being like "you dress like a boy because you like to and I do the role as a Rose Bride because I like to" is an interesting conversation to have, I don't know if I believe it. I'm not claiming Utena's reasoning for dressing the way she does is false, I just also don't think it's the full story considering how she was also inspired to dress a certain way by a figure in her past. As for Anthy though, I do think it's false. I think she certainly believes what she's saying but the idea that she just naturally enjoys being subservient (cooking, cleaning) and being an object (more on that later) does not seem organic or 'true' to her.

my girlfriend wants a Chu-Chu plushie... ruh roh

okay back to the duels. I was already thinking she'd object to further duels because the one she partook in was exclusively for the benefit of Wakaba and she has no interest in the power plays over the Rose Bride. she doesn't even know about what they're fighting for, right? so why would she care

god, Saionji is such an abusive ex. I mean, obviously, but wow. I do think the situation is worsened by the fact that the duels confer a sense of ownership over Anthy, but the entitlement... the way he feels like she's betrayed him when he's the one who lost while also having THE ADVANTAGE? rotating him calling her shameless... Saionji-senpai vs Utena-sama... hm

I honestly didn't really notice the castle at the top of the sky when I was watching episode 1, so now the dialogue about entering it makes sense lmao

Utena claiming not to care about Anthy's situation but then immediately getting into the Sword of Dios rite and subconsciously moving to protect the rose even at the potential risk to her... yeah okay. Even Saionji calls her out on it lmao

final thoughts on the way Anthy is rendered an object to be possessed and owned but the way Saionji literally talks about her and the Sword of Dios in the same breath as 'glory' rather than, you know, Anthy being a person he cares for says it all. Her worth is only in the sense of possessing the power of Dios (whatever that means)

... is the prince Dios??? is he dead? what the fuck.

.... is Dios End of the World?!??!!? I'm so confused

Next episode is a ball episode and I'm excited for that one. I love balls, I love intrigue, I love messes.

This episode was good though, even if the pace felt different than the first episode. I think my central interest so far in the series is unraveling the mystery of what the fuck is going on at this school (the student council being powerful enough to make kids vanish is so funny btw), but I'm also deeply invested in Anthy. her passivity in the face of everything is alarming and I just want to understand it. how much of it is facade? how much of it is genuine conditioning? I want to know!!!

[lime1991]

hold on i have to recraft my trolls age hc... i just learned there was a brozone website and on said site we have:

January 2nd 1999 is, maybe, Branch's birthday? And instead of being like "awesome im a big brother" Floyd just goes "thank god im not the baby anymore" after hes born.

Baby Branch's oldest message is this:

February 26th 1999. He's over a month old at this point, but the phrasing of "tonight's show" leads me to believe he was part of the band from literal birth (also why Floyd's first reaction to his birth is "thank you for saving me") and therefore this isnt his first show.

The last logins for all of the brothers is March 11th 1999

And just a day before, according to John Dory, new merch dropped

Soooo i think its safe to say around March 11th 1999 is when the band broke up after their ruined performance, which makes sense that it was also the last time any of them logged into the website. (though i think it would be sad and sweet if it showed branch had logged into it sometime recently but whatever)

So that brings me back around to the age thing.

The trollspedia page states Poppy is around 21-23, and I agree and am more inclined towards 22-23 personally. Seeing as Branch was born in January 1999, he'd be 24 in 2023. But the only thing that confuses me a little is Branch saying its been 20 years since the band broke up:

For 1999 to be 20 years ago, that would mean the movie takes place in 2019. And... honestly that's not too far off from 2023 so i don't mind that being the case, its always vague about what year its meant to be, a lot of animated movies are like this. Also i wanna bring up that the song Bridget and Poppy sing in the beginning (Good As Hell by Lizzo) came out in 2019, SO... its not impossible that the movie is meant to take place in 2019.

SO... with this all in mind... my new theory/headcanon:

As of 2019...

John Dory - 39 Bruce - 38 Clay - 33 Floyd - 28 Branch - 20

And as of 1999...

John Dory - 19 Spruce - 18 Clay - 13 Floyd - 8 Branch - 2 months

ALSO lets not forget the fact that troll age stages are different from humans', a 2 month old is singing and dancing in a boyband. They tend to mature past their actual age really quickly.

(i know these are country trolls, but the idea is still there. as soon as they pop out the egg, trolls are basically toddlers)

And I've tried to keep my theory compliant with what the wikia says (like how Clay's 1999 self is referred to as a teenager, therefore i made him 13) because i believe theyre mostly right. however. i also believe the movie takes place in 2019, not 2023. even if that wasnt the intention of dreamworks, they wrote in the script that its been 20 years since 1999... that can literally only be 2019 lol.

But if we want to imagine it takes place in 2023, heres age hcs for that too:

John Dory - 43 Bruce - 42 Clay - 37 Floyd - 32 Branch - 24

Btw this means, in my hc, Poppy is 19 in 2019 and 23 in 2023, as is implied in the wiki. Which makes sense to me, because Branch is obviously older than her by at least a year. With my hc that Bruce and JD are only a year apart (again, in compliance with the wikia that claims JD was a teenager in 1999 and therefore not 20 like i want him to be. and making the "heart throb" not a minor bc thats weird to me) the moment where Poppy calls JD the "old one" but later fawns over Bruce is made extra funny when the two of them are so close in age.

But i want to say for the millionth time so nobody gets confused bc of all these numbers: I THINK BAND TOGETHER TAKES PLACE IN 2019!!! not 2023. And don't even ask about how the first movie truly fits into this, I DONT KNOW, they definitely did not fully think through a trilogy in 2016. Some things are just a product of when they came out and thats ok.

[tensbowl]

my thoughts on beastars!

i recently finished reading beastars and honestly it’s been a WHILE since a manga had me this hooked since.. given. i used to read a shitton of manga in middle school but i gradually stopped when i entered hs (stemmed from a desire to Fit In, mayhaps..!), but i still keep up with haikyuu and given news cuz those are the ones that meant the most to me. beastars always caught my attention but because i’m frankly quite a sheep, i never read it. everyone around me told me it was ‘furry manga’ and i just didn’t care enough to do my own research LOL but here i am now, emotionally bound to legoshi. so much for defeating the furry allegations :(

i loved it btw it was a solid 8/10. there was laughter. a lot of confused laughter, but laughter. my favorite characters are legoshi, louis, and sagwan, although i think i love all of them. except for kyuu idk something about that rabbit pmo.. also completely unrelated but i’m a little scared of rabbits and when haru first showed up i was PETRIFIED. the one thing i hate most about rabbits is their black eyes (oh my god they freak me out) but there she was, standing on two legs, staring at me through my ipad pro screen with no mercy. i was shaking. but whatever i love her now and i think this made me get over my fear. so.. win/win?

i don’t remember all the arc names so i made up my own! i’ll discuss the manga in their respective story arcs and then get deep with the characters.. so i present to you my personal beastars story arcs (the way EYE saw them..)

obviously.. spoiler alert for everything..!

high school arc

this is probably my favorite arc JUST BECAUSE i’m a big sucker for high school stories. right off the bat i fw the drama club HEAVY because i do stagework at my school too! but damn these animals do it so.. difficultly? why are we not preprogramming the lights? why are we hand sewing these costumes? is there any blocking on stage? why isn’t there a stage manager to stop legoshi and bill from almost killing each other? let me loose in this drama club and i’ll have it demolished and rebuilt in 2 hours tops i’d be running it like the mf army. but whatever i guess paru did not care about the accuracy of the drama club which is all right with me (it’s not). 

my first impressions of legoshi were so strange. i know he’s not the bad guy but oh my god he’s SO AWKWARD. if i was in this universe (i’ll be saying this a lot) i would for SURE be spreading rumors about the weird wolf man in my drama club that speaks in rhymes and riddles. 

i also had no big impressions of any other characters until we get to louis. i thought jack was cool, the drama club kids were cool, and haru looked creepy but i didn’t mind her. but oh my god louis. he was driving me INSANE. i swear for every panel he showed up in i was containing all my anger. i was trying so hard not to lose my shit but this deer got on my nerves SO BAD….. HE for one spoke in rhymes and riddles and i’d be lying if i told you i understand anything of what he said in the high school arc. he got his shit together in the later arcs and got less pompous but in this arc he was losing me. and i was pissed off at him. the only thing i could think about was ‘diva syndrome’. and not in a cute ‘who is THIS diva’ way, in more like a ‘i really want to watch your ego death’ way. 

when haru tried to get freaky in the gardening club shed i lowkey was not phased. i feel like in a lot of reviews i read about beastars this was the scene that was turning people off, but i remembered my 2nd grade art teacher showing us zootopia and telling us that rabbits are very sexually active and usually have a lot of kids (why did he tell us this? idk. he got fired). so i was like ‘oh that’s just haru’s instincts!’ but also i guess.. that was kinda weird of her. but after her whole speech about how sex gets rid of the small and powerless feeling she has, we get a better understanding of her actions. though i will say, this was freaky as hell of haru. 

now i hate to admit to this (as louis is one of my skrunklies now) but i was CHEERING when he sprained his ankle. i was so happy. i thought he was going to die and i was so happy. but then a new enemy approached — bill the tiger. right off the bat i didn’t trust him. but after finding out that he drank RABBIT’S BLOOD oh it was so over. i was so over him. i was cheering for legoshi when they were fighting but when they brought that shit on stage i was done. i’m a firm believer of keeping things professional at least ON STAGE but these guys had no decorum. sigh. 

but this also got me thinking — are the animal limbs/blood being sold in the back alley market kinda like… drugs? i mean, it’s also like cannibalism (but not really..) in a way.. it’s hard to find a parallel for it. but honestly i think it’d be harder not to go to the market than to indulge in those animalistic instincts after all, so i was thinking, ‘is it really fair for me to hate bill’? and the answer was no. at least for me. i mean yeah he drank rabbit’s blood and i (and legoshi) hated him for it, but doesn’t that mean we should also be hating on like 3/4ths of the civilization in beastars? and i sure don’t. and louis says later too but i was thinking, don’t carnivores NEED to eat meat to survive? it’s kinda unfair for them, too. a double edged sword!!!! i was hooked at this point and i decided i wouldn’t hold it against bill but judge his character based on his actions later. 

i rate this arc a 9/10. one point off for strange theater etiquette. 

louis’s emo phase

this is the emo phase! basically the time frame from when louis was a mafia boss (which is so crazy). let’s talk about that because i didn’t care much about the meteor festival (apart from the fact that haru and legoshi were having some chemistry and juno’s exciting appearance). first off, louis is supposed to be a crazy big heir to a ceo’s throne.. are you telling me he has no image to protect and he can just go on and be a mafia boss to a bunch of carnivores? me personally if my son was acting like that he would never see daylight ever again. also louis was being so emo i get it he’s trying to show them that herbivores aren’t all weak and he found a place where he actually has power but oh my god this was so me in middle school. i sympathized. this was when i started liking louis because i realized that maybe i was hating earlier cuz we’re so alike. louis my son. 

it also freaked me out that legoshi was having internal conflicts about whether he likes haru in a romantic way or a predatory way, but it also only makes sense. so i was like yeah checks out! i guess these are the kind of questions you gotta have in the beastars universe. and then we explored more of the back alley market, which answered a shitton of questions i had and freaked me out a whole lot. i also will say now that haru ALSO speaks in rhymes in riddles like louis. do you think they speak in this cryptic way to each other in bed? also hi gouhin! he’s funny and kinda reminded me of my old drum teacher. 

when haru got kidnapped by the shishigumi ON SCHOOL GROUNDS (i presumed?) i was shellshocked. first off, is the mafia just allowed to roam around like that?? and there’s no protection around school? yikes!!! and legoshi’s lovestruck/extremely hungry being CHASES AFTER?? wow. legoshi and i are the same age in this arc (17) and let me tell you that if my crush got kidnapped i would stay the fuck out of that. i can’t tell if legoshi is braver or stupider than me. but i respect the grind. #forthehuzz

also when they just took out the mafia boss like that? wow. imagine being a minor and having a murder record like THAT.. jesus christ. anywho he deserved to die i love haru. i loved haru and legoshi’s interactions in the hotel after that; it was sweet but also sad cuz they’re just tryna love… but their instincts won’t let them. atp i was thinking ‘are they really MEANT to love then?’ like if their instincts are going against them. but honestly fuck your animal instincts. and maybe i misread this cuz haru is speaking in code but legoshi makes her happy and vice versa.. maybe the REAL animalistic instinct was the love we found along the way…

and a little segment on juno yayyyy! i personally love all the characters because they all feel so accurately immature in their high school ways. juno is a first year (15/16?) just craving for a cool same-species boyfriend and like.. yeah. i was thinking like that too girl. you can’t blame a girl for trying and you can’t blame a girl for loving! a lot of people seem to find juno annoying (the slander on reddit is insane) but i just think she’s a teenage girl. good for her. 

and then they also found out that riz killed tem and fought about it. riz’s backstory was kinda sad but i can’t lie to you i felt only little sympathy towards this bear. what he did was bad and he is a murderer! it seems like all these characters speak in code but this is what i got from riz’s huge monologue: even though he took strength suppressants and took on a “kind bear” persona, it didn’t stop herbivores from being scared of him. tem was the only animal that saw him in a genuinely friendly light, and that affection for tem overwhelmed riz (in a positive way but his instincts won over his logical side (sad face)) and riz ate him. he was also off his pills because taking them made him feel like more of a monster than he actually was. tbh riz was a victim of the system but that doesn’t make him any less of a killer,, but i totally get where he’s coming from. as a person who takes meds, it’s hard not to feel like some twisted thing while you’re taking them (especially if the meds are promised to ‘fix you’). and riz also created a whole twisted narrative in his own head about what happened, blurring the lines of reality and fiction.. but still he killed a dude :/ it sucks

also hold on. i went on a huge spiel about riz but i didn’t even TOUCH on the fact that legoshi went CRAZY after eating LOUIS’S LEG???? like okay damn what the FUCKK. i was laughing at first but then i saw louis’s leg all bandaged up and legoshi all crazy and my smile DROPPED. this was no joke legoshi was going primal. also makes me wonder what stopped legoshi from eating louis whole? maybe he’s just too nice for that. 

props to louis for being an amazing mafia boss. it’s the same thing as a ceo anyway but it had me kinda proud of this guy for leading an entire fleet of lions like that. also the shishigumi scared me when they were gonna kill haru but now? they’re kind of a joke. i love them though. 

overall this arc gets a 8.2/10. things were unrealistic (high schoolers nerfing a mafia boss) but also they’re all bipedal animals so what the hell. sure. mangione should spare louis. 

high school drop out arc

legoshi rightfully decides he’s had enough of this strange education system and drops out of high school! as a person who goes to boarding school though it has me wondering how he did that so easily. whatever they’re animals (what i keep telling myself). 

as a 17 year old, if i had to suddenly go fend for myself in Civilization, i would end up back on the doorsteps of cherryton sobbing. but legoshi, as i stated before, is way stronger/stupider than i am, so he did just fine. he got a shitty apartment and made friends. he also trains with gouhin to get over his predatory instincts and learn to love haru and has an acid trip involving a moth which i just filed under ‘typical shounen stuff’ in my head. it was fun but i don’t remember anything from it. also legoshi was bald in either this arc or louis’s emo arc and i liked it but EVERYONE MADE FUN OF HIM. whatever they don’t love you like i do. 

they also introduced sagwan, one of my favs! such a wise man. i love him. he’s also so kind to legoshi right off the bat which surprisingly isn’t a common feat. he also opens up the door to sea life, where they believe in a ‘life cycle’ philosophy. life isn’t too precious over there and they’re all reborn. which is cool. they talk a lot about life in this arc and it really makes you think. i might’ve shed a tear during this arc i don’t remember. at around this time though i was thinking, what happened to legoshi’s friends from high school? he doens’t have a cell phone, so does he just.. not talk to them???? i can’t lie i’d be pissed if that were me! like jack was nothing but a good friend but because legoshi is stupid and needs to Find Himself, he just kinda deserts him. but literally don’t even fret because they come back in a couple more chapters. unrelated, but jack also tries to kill himself at one point which had my jaw DROPPED. i guess yeah. dogs are engineered to be a man’s best friend (and for intelligence) which poses a lot of difficulties for them. they’re essentially genetically modified civilians. how creepy. and also his whole dynamic with being friends with his ‘ancestor’ legoshi?? wow. paru itagaki my jaw dropped a little. 

and now on to a mini that i like to call…

MINI ARC: homosexual seniors

gosha and yahya!!! i love gosha. what a kind man he is (and his story with his wife had me gasping like i was watching a soap). yahya, on the other hand, i didn’t care too much for. he was interesting, but 1) i couldn’t take him seriously because he is a horse, and 2) he’s a little fucked in the head! his carrot farm, attacking his friend’s grandson, and his strange ways of speaking all turned me off a lot. also is yahya a real herbivore if his carrots are fertilized… like that? what makes him so much better than the other animals? 

i thought gosha and yahya were good ‘two sides of the same coin’ kinda deal. also it was pissing me off how yahya was putting gosha down for choosing family. does yahya have loving parents? i’d think not from all this bitterness. also WHY was he trying to beat up legoshi like that? gosha’s better than me because i would’ve cut ties forever. 

overall i rate this arc a 6/10. not my fav! i liked it when legoshi was doing slice-of-life stuff with his new adult friends and learning more about the world, but then i was thrown off course by the homosexual horse and shounen training montages and legoshi’s crazy philosophical acid trip with the caterpillar he ate. 

melon domination

ta daaaa already the last arc. when legoshi let melon go, i was kinda pissed but i can’t blame him. legoshi spent most of his life KNOWING he was an outsider and not really knowing much about the hybrid life, and now with haru he’s almost promising to a life full of more discrimination and hate. i thought it was normal how he only wanted to connect with someone this affected by the system as his future kid/his mom will be/was, but also come on man. lock in he’s a criminal. 

also around this time i saw some arguments online that legoshi shouldn’t have a kid with haru because all hybrids will end up bad like melon. I DISAGREE HEAVILY ACTUALLY… i think melon only turned out this way because of his fucked up home life (strange predatory mother, presumed dead/deadbeat father, bullying at school) and lack of support at school or home. obviously that kind of hostile environment would raise a hostile kid. melon is not only a victim of the system but also a victim of abuse and bullying! i think that if legoshi and haru were to have a kid, that kid would be raised with love (at least in the house). and it’s not like ALL hybrids are evil — leano (legoshi’s mom) wasn’t evil, but she was ostracized by the community leading her to commit. legoshi is technically a hybrid too, but he’s not demonized because you can hardly tell he’s a hybrid. i think melon’s situation is all about his specific environmental factors.. tldr let legoshi and haru do whatever the fuck they want LMAO

legoshi communicating with the shark was SICK. people hate on the shishigumi for trying to kill louis and legoshi but like… they’re mafia! what else are they supposed to do..? lmao 

also props to melon for having a phd by the way. you could’ve been dr melon but no you wanted to pursue.. other interests, it seems..!

i’m also extremely confused about why legoshi turned white. who did that to you. he literally got whitewashed. 

the carni-herbi war was interesting to learn about (nice job jack) but the whale was SO FUNNY to me i don’t know why. and immediately cutting to yahya talking with said old-ass whale had me cracking up. the whale also had literally nothing to offer it was so underwhelming LMAO paru you lost yourself in the sauce. i respect it girl me too. 

MINI ARC: legoshi drafts himself into war

the turf war was really cool. i enjoyed this mini arc a lot it felt a lot like pokemon LMAO

the quiz was cool too! legoshi is very very knowledgeable because he makes an effort to get to know lots of different types of animals. #respect i love this guy. 

there’s a lot more that happened in this arc but honestly?! i have nothing to say about it. i thoroughly enjoyed all of it and read it with nail-biting anxiety. 8/10! two points off because of the whale thing. and kyuu oh my god that made 0 sense i’ve said this before and i’ll say it again: that whole ‘okay legoshi!’ thing could’ve been ANYONE. it could’ve been louis.  

ending

i liked the ending. i see a lot of complaints for it online but i have no qualms! i didn’t expect the world to change so suddenly (of course they’ll build another black market lol what’s a society without some crime?) and i didn’t expect for legoshi and haru to skip away into the sunset and for juno to get with louis and for everyone to make it out alive. it was realistic and the characters were lovably immature and awkward yet wise and open. i respected everyone’s vulnerability and honesty and wrongdoings. honestly this manga will squeeze right in between haikyuu and given in my heart as one of the mangas that i will never stop loving (and will love in secrecy SHH)

i still do have some lingering questions though. have they ever heard of the impossible burger? how the HELL did they evolve like this (i NEED darwin) and are there humans in this world? would it be wrong of me to say that i’m attracted to legoshi? i want to know more about that strange club yahya and legoshi went to. how did melon find time to get a phd and can i read his dissertation? why didn’t gosha just absolutely pummel melon’s dad because i totally would’ve? 

beastars, in all of its genius and strangeness, leaves us in the dark a little. but honestly i don’t mind! sometimes endings don’t have to wrap everything up nicely. though i do agree that the writing got a little messy and hard to follow towards the end, i didn’t find too many difficulties while trying to comprehend the main story. i loooved the slice of life chapters (beastrike!) and i truly think all characters are quite dimensional and there’s no true villain (you could argue melon, but i’ll argue that the real villain is… society……). 10/10 series, would totally read again. and this time, i won’t be scared of haru.

[cinderellaenjoyer]

Epic: The Swap Saga - Act 1 + Thunder Saga

HEAVILY inspired by @bambiilooloo 's 'Return to Samos' AU btw!!!

Roles are:

Scylla - Odysseus

Circe - Eurlychos

Calypso - Polities

Athena - Hermes

Polyphemus - Lotus Eaters

Posideon - Aeolus

Ctimine - Elpenor

Penelope - Perimidies

Telemachus - Chabyris

Antonious - Sirenelope (Suitors and Sirens swap in general)

The crew (bar Penelope and Ctimine) are nymphs

The Troy Saga

So for some reason a war where a woman with six dog heads, the daughter of Helios, and a literal goddess are involved takes. 10 years longer than it should because of. idk the gods interfering or something.

Anyways! Wooden horse plan happens, blah blah blah. Scylla ends up getting a vision mid siege about someone stabbing her, Zeus takes her to the infant. Scylla freaks out about having to murder a Literal Infant, but Zeus tells her if she doesn't she won't get to see Perimidies (her best friend ) and Chabyris (her sister) again.

Scylla muses over this for a while. She may have six dogs heads for feet, she may be a soldier, but she is just a woman despite it all. Eventually she has one of her dog heads swallow the baby to get it over with.

Skip to a little while later, and the crew are on a boat, sailing home. Circe, the second command, points out 'hey we're kinda low on food rn.' Luckily Calypso, Scylla's best friend, spots an island filled with sheep. But there doesn't seem to be any farmers, so Scylla and Calypso go to check it out.

On the island, Calypso suggests Scylla 'Greet the world with love and open arms'. They end up running into Polyphemus, who turns out to be the carer of the sheep. Seeing that Polyphemus cares too much about his sheep to give them up for food, Calypso asks where they can find somewhere else. Polyphemus suggests an island west, said to be filled with delicious fruit. Generally just all around good times.

Well. Up until Hermes butts in (in Scylla's head) and goes 'yeah love is cool and all but you gotta be a little sneaky sometimes!'. I think we get a flashback of Hermes teaching a younger Scylla how to be more sneaky, generally a prankster but also putting it to good use.

The Lotus Saga

The crew arrives at the Lotus island. At first they're happy by all the fruit. It's almost too good to be true!! Bc it is. The Lotus eaters show up and get real pissy about having their fruit stolen. Scylla offers them wine and introduces herself as 'nobody' to one of them, but since she clearly isn't taking them seriously they end up attacking anyways.

I think Survive would be really funny at first here. Just these little gremlin creatures attacking grown ass soldiers with swords. In the middle of it Calypso does get some fruit via open arms approuch, unfortunately eating it weakens her, she looses her sword, and the Lotus eaters stab her and kill her. And now they have a swrord so uh oh. Several people die, but eventually the Lotus eaters end up passing out. Turns out wine and lotus are. Not a good thing to have mixed up in your stomach especially when you're teeny tiny

Circe has to snap Scylla out of her 'my best friend just died' trance. With the Lotus eaters passed out, Scylla takes the flower head off of one of the Lotus Eaters, making it hyper-aware and obviously freaked out. Turns out this is the one she said her name was 'Nobody' too, so the other Lotus Eaters get confused. Hermes actually congratles Scylla on her sneakiness and getting away with it. Unfortunately Scylla goes 'actually you know since they killed my best friend and refused to show mercy I'm gonna make this a lesson for them' and doxxes herself.

My Goodbye. Hermes yells at Scylla for her self-doxxing, she calls him alone and prideful and a lair, so he just. Leaves.

The Wind Saga

Storm is pretty much the same. The main difference is that they find the Lastrogoneon's Island, and Scylla realises 'hey that's where Posideon lives! We can ask him for a hand!' so she has the ship dock there

Circe tries to warn her against it given how dangerous the Gods and especially Posideon can be. The girls are having a mild argument that shows Circe's doubts in Scylla. Scylla pulls Circe aside to say 'hey maybe DON'T make the crew doubt me'

Scylla goes to Posideon, asks for help. He gives her a bag of waves, along with some advice - keep your friends close, and ruthlessness will be mercy upon yourself. Of course everyone wants to know what's in the bag but Scylla is like 'No touch!!'. So everyone's getting suspicious. Nine days of watching the bag with no sleep go by, Scylla takes a 5 second nap and. Bags open. Water everywhere. They get sent to just under Aeolus island.

Anyways! Aeolus heard from the Winions what happened to the Lotus eaters, and they're uh. Not happy. Your enemies are getting closer ruthlessness and the likes. They knock all the ships over except for the one Scylla and her crew is on. Scylla uses the last of the waves in the bag to get away from Aeolus. They'll be back so. Worry.

The Euyrlocus Saga

Circe has something she wants to tell Scylla, but Scylla is still pretty early in her character development so she's not in the mood. She sends Circe and some scouts to look around the island. Half an hour later Circe comes running back. Turns out this wizard, Euyrlocus, turned the others into cows. Sooo. Yeah.

Scylla goes to save the others, but gets stopped by Athena on the way. Athena tells her that she'll need to be strategic for this fight and hands her the moly, telling her to use it wisely.

I think Euyrlochus would be. More upfront about Scylla just walking into his house. 'I've got people to protect, men i can't neglect.' Epic fight!! I think it's more hands (well, sword and magic stick) on since I don't see Eurlychos as the type to rely on a Chimera? Anyways he loses so. Plan B

There are other ways of persuasion!!! Ends up not working cause Scylla isn't interested in that (frankly neither is Euyrlochus so it's a relief for both of them). Scylla explains her situation (missing her bff and sister) , Euyrlochus offers to help get her to the underworld and turns everyone back.

Oh and Ctimine falls off the roof. I think Eury gives her a burial to let her go peacefully.

The Underworld Saga

Main changes is Tiresias is a girl, Calypso and Scylla's mom show up in the underworld instead of Polities and Odysseus' mom. Also Ctimine is there instead of Elpenor.

A fun little idea I have is that Scylla has been hiding her dog heads since 'Just A Man', but let's them loose during Monster. To show she's changed and is no longer humanising herself, literally and metaphorically.

The Thunder Saga

Antonius is a sailor who knows about routes and a little bit about people, and he's also. Kinda evil. He disguises himself as Perimidies to trick Scylla into jumping off her ship and drowning. She plays along, even though he clearly gets some stuff wrong (thinking her and Perimidies are actually lovers) asking 'Perimides' for a way to avoid Aeolus.

"They will chase you high and low, so find place they'd never go. The one way you'll get home, is sailing where they're scared to roam. It's through the kingdom of Ithaca!'

Suddenly Scylla drops the act and has one of her heads bite down on Antonious' arm, then uses it to drag him onto the ship. Yeah turns out his other crew mates got snatched while trying to distract Scylla. She is a different beast now.

"Make them all bleed, we're ending this now! Throw their bodies back in the ocean, let them drown".

So. Ithica. The king, Odysseus, sits at the top of idk some high structure near the sea and shoots random people with his arrows. Silly goofy guy. Anyways Circe admits to opening the bag and gets told to light up 6 torches. 6 dead rest of the crew traumatized and pissed.

Mutiny is so so Epic (pun intended) with Circe's witch powers and Scylla's six heads. Just before Scylla can kill Circe Penelope stabs her. Someones lucks run out.

I think they end up at a Demeter island with a load of pigs. After some back and forth, Circe kills a pig and uh. Wuh-oh this is not good.

Thunder Bringer is largely the same. Only the girls are more creeped out with how Zeus sings about women. Someone's gotta die today and you have got the the final say.

'Captain?'

'I have to see them"

"but we'll die"

"I know*

Boom. Everyone but Scylla dead.

Anyways! Hope you enjoyed reading!

[canonmisogynyvictimstournament]

PROPAGANDA

CHLOE BOURGEOIS (MIRACULOUS LADYBUG) (CW: Child Abuse)

1.) Girl was done so dirty… She was starting to develop and could've had a redemption arc and then they made her even more one-dimensional than she was at the start, dumbed her down, and the creator on twitter claimed she was never abused and that she never cared about her childhood friend, only his status. And in a scene that thankfully got cut by editors, her father was going to disown her, adopt her sister instead (who is like a "nicer" replacement for her) and pass Chloe onto her abusive mother.

And then a male character gets introduced who is also at first an antagonist with a backstory that gets revealed later, also a childhood friend of the same character, but it's acknowledged that he got abused by his parent and he gets a redemption arc and a romantic subplot and a spot on the hero team (which Chloe was excluded from because she was irresponsible with her power and revealed her identity publicly… Except he also did that)

This show is about girl power btw.

2.) Chloe was done so fucking dirty. So basically, the creator of the show (Thomas Astruc) created the character in the first place as a stand-in for his childhood bully (red flag no.1) Because of this, any development that she as a character got from the other writers (and it was a lot) got retconned, just because he hated her. Other, objectively much more evil, (male) characters (the main villain!) were portrayed as more sympathetic than her, because god forbid a hurt, abused, emotionally immature, unloved little girl be portrayed as anything other than an unlovable, unforgiveable unchangeable demon. Also she's obsessed with clothes, shoes and handbags, because she's a mean girl, don't you see, so obviously the nice girls (who don't wear makeup while Chloe does) are better than her.

3.) Stuck up spoiled rich girl is treated as worse than the actual villains of the show. At some point we get a glimpse into her awful traumatizing home life and she starts to be redeemed, but the second something doesn't go her way she backslides and is suddenly even more evil and dumb. Also her father is incredibly neglectful but it's portrayed as her somehow abusing him into doing what she wants and he's so sad about his awful evil daughter. He gets a redemption arc but never actually becomes a better father. She's seen as unfixable.

MILLA MAXWELL (TALES OF XILLIA) (CW: Inappropriate Age Gaps)

1.) Milla was the first female MC in a Tales game. Xillia actually has dual protagonists; Milla is a female demigod on a mission to stop global warming, while the other one, Jude, is a male med student who gets dragged into her quest. The game says that you can play as Jude or Milla… except it’s extremely obvious you are meant to play Jude’s route, and play it first. Why? Because Milla dies at the end of act 2. The plot continues in Jude’s route. If you’re on Milla’s route, you do not get to see it. Instead, you wander around heaven for a while until you’re booted back into the world of the living as a deus ex machina. It is impossible to follow. Milla doesn’t get to reckon with her own death, while her friends all get to reckon with it offscreen. All of this character drama is conveyed to her through two skippable conversations. Playing this was completely infuriating, not to mention confusing. Even in her own route she’s written as the cool, mysterious hyper-competent woman.

I have a lot of issues with the plot of this game (it’s bad!) but that’s the bitterest.

2.) 1.) If you decide to play Milla’s route, and not Jude’s route, there is a part of the game where Milla has her spine broken by the villain, and you are forced to play as Jude anyway. Her paralysis is resolved with little fanfare (the important part of this life-altering injury was Jude fighting to defend her honour, of course).

2.) (CW: inappropriate age gaps) Milla is 20, but she’s teased as a ship with the other PC Jude, who is 15 (despite being a university student? I have no idea why they did this; most Tales protagonists are 17-21). You might say “hey wait, it would be extremely inappropriate for her to be interested in him, as he is a teenager and she is an adult!” Well, first of all, it never actually seems like she is interested in him, like at all. This plot is solely about the fantasy of having a hot older woman attracted to you, presented for the presumed male audience, presumed to be playing as Jude. If you’re playing as Milla it is a totally bizarre informed plot that comes out of nowhere. Also, I guess to get around any objections to the age gap, the game pulls a “born sexy yesterday” type dynamic with Milla, where she might be a 20-year-old demigod but really she knows nothing about human society and Jude the prodigy has to teach her. Everything about this is extremely terrible from every angle—I don’t think the writers even thought of “teenage boy shipped with adult woman” as much of a problem because of the genders. And from Milla’s end the relationship is totally incomprehensible. They didn’t think about why she would be interested in Jude, because what’s important is that Jude has women who are interested in him (she’s one of 3+).

In the sequel, there’s an alternate universe version of Milla whose love interest is the PC of that game, a guy the same age as her. I was so relieved! They actually “are both adults” and “have anything in common”! Unfortunately this hint of a relationship ends when the alternate Milla is sent to super hell (not only dead but her soul erased from existence) for contrived plot reasons. We are supposed to be okay with this, because she believes she deserves to die. Why? Because her actions in this universe apparently indirectly caused Jude’s death as a baby. Even though she barely knows Jude, he is, of course, the most important person in the universe, and so the only moral option is for her to die by suicide. ARGH.

Again, I can’t emphasize this enough: she was presented as the groundbreaking first female PC of a Tales game. And we were let down SO BAD.

3.) Since you’re looking for propaganda, Milla Maxwell. Very skimpy outfit. Their justification? She has a handmaid that designed and created her clothes. But the handmaid is a 16 year old boy who’s in love with her. And she has no idea about human society, so she’s just like. Ivar put in so much effort, I’ve been assured this is fashionable. She spends a 2 hour section of the game in another plane of existence, in a skin tight white body suit with cut outs at the boobs and inner thighs

In the sequel, her outfit is almost as bad, but this time she chose it and they don’t even discuss it 🙃