#the feeling of incompetence when you can't do anything to make your loved ones happy

[i-spilled-my-soup]

doing close reading of the titans curse to study for a time travel au and augh. auguuuagh

[heavysighing-dreamyeyes]

The Birthday Blurb

I think we all just really love Jason Todd and he definitely makes me feel things. Anyway, Happy Birthday, Jason Todd and Alfred Pennyworth! (Vaugley suggestive, as a treat) ~1.4k words

Jason doesn't care much for his birthday. You're slowly changing his opinion on that. It's not that people haven't celebrated his birthday, it's just no one's celebrated it the way you have.

He wakes up a little later than normal, and frowns when he notices your side of the bed is cold. He clambers out of your shared bed and stumbles to the kitchen.

You're there. Dressed in his shirt. It's a sight to see, probably one of his favorites, he decides when you look over your shoulder and offer him a bright smile.

"Happy birthday, Jason! I made breakfast, did you want coffee?" You ask as he walks behind you, wrapping his arms around your waist and tucking his chin against your skin.

"Breakfast?" He asks, voice heavy with sleep as he presses a kiss to your neck. Breakfast is nice, but the fact that he knows he has a whole day with you is even nicer.

"Mhm," you answer idly, shifting slightly in his gasp to reach for the plates. He beats you to it, keeping you firmly against his body with one arm.

You laugh a little and thank him. Jason determines then and there that it's the best present he's ever gotten.

"C'mon," You tell him, and he lets you pull away so you both can sit and eat. The food is great. At least he thinks it is, he's a little distracted by how pretty you look this morning, every morning, to really taste the food.

He smiles blissfully at your stories, how your voice tilts when you're excited, "So, I was thinking we visit that bookstore you like? And maybe that cafe we had our second date at? Then we can head over to the manor for your party."

He hums fondly and reaches over to brush invisible strings from your shoulder, "It's just dinner. Not really a party."

You grin and lean into his touch, "It's kind of a party. Your family's gonna be there. And your friends. Roy's bringing Lian."

Jason matches your smile, "That'll be nice."

"It will," You say eagerly, and grab his plate to clean up before he can take yours.

He pouts a little, standing up to try and grab the dirty dishes, "I can do that. You cooked."

You laugh a little, teasing and avoiding his hands, "It's your birthday."

"Doesn't make me incompetent, you know," he protests, lazily following you around the kitchen.

"Sure," You agree, turning to meet him and reaching out to brush his hair out his eyes, "But it does mean I want today to be special for you."

His eyes light up, and a sly smile spreads across his face, "Every day is special with you."

You make a face and laugh, "Cheesy. I walked into that."

He laughs with you, grabbing your hand as you lead the way back to the bedroom, "You did. You know I can't help it, not when it's right in front of me."

"Yeah, yeah, you're real funny," You drawl, letting go of his hand to get dressed. He only gets you a little distracted when his hands start to trace your bare sides. But hey, it's his birthday, he figures he can be a bit selfish.

When you both finally make it out of the door of your apartment, Jason doesn't bother to hide the smug look on his face. He tucks you under his arm, admiring the marks on your throat you couldn't quite hide, "You're pretty."

"You're a menace," You answer, but even if you try to sound annoyed, your eyes look nothing but happy and playful, "we're seeing your family later. Alfred's going to be there."

He nods, eyes trailing from you to watch your surroundings as you walk to the bookstore, "Well it's not like they don't already know. Remember during that Christmas party when they walked in on us–"

"Hey!" You cut him off, embarrassment painting your face, "We agreed to never mention that."

He smiles wickedly, "Mm, I don't think I agreed to that. Besides, I thought I could do whatever I want."

"Anything besides talk about the most mortifying moment of my life," You correct and nudge his side as he pulls open the bookstore door for you.

"Fair enough," Jason chirps, content with the look on your face as you wander the shelves.

You both pick out a handful of books, he gets to kiss you, tucked behind a row of bookcases, and he doesn't think he's stopped smiling since you've settled in the chair next to him. The coffee shop is quiet, sweet smelling, and full of memories between the two of you.

He traces patterns over your thigh idly as you sip your drink, "This is where that kid dropped their cupcake all over you."

You smile, "Yeah. Ruined my nice shirt. You gave me your jacket."

He trades your drink for his, and takes a sip. He grins when you try his before trading cups back, "I was freaking out."

You raise an eyebrow at him, "You were freaking out? I was the one that had frosting everywhere."

"Yeah, but you looked sad. You were nice to the kid and said it was fine. But you looked sad and I didn't know how to make it better," he admits.

"You did make it better. You make lots of things better. Besides, it wasn't all bad, I got to wear your jacket. I didn't realize how soft they are," You say fondly, leaning a little into his side.

Jason pulls his hand from your thigh to drape his arm over your shoulder, and presses a kiss to the side of your head, "You make things better too. And I liked seeing you in my jacket."

He melts a little when you smile up at him, "Now we're both being cheesy, Jason."

"Nothin' wrong with that," he murmurs as you laugh, idly reminding him that you need to leave for Wayne Manor soon.

It takes some convincing to get you on his bike, you're worried over Alfreds present, but your helmet is on, and your arms are around his waist soon enough. Having you hold onto him while he drives down Gothams roads is another strong contender for his favorite birthday gift.

The ride ends too soon for him. But he can't complain, he thinks as he helps you off his motorcycle, there's still the ride back. And maybe you won't notice this time if he takes the long way home.

There's more people than he expected, once they're inside, and Jason thinks he masks his surprise well. It's a nice party. He watches you kiss Alfred on the cheek and hand him his present. He plays with Lian and pretends the Tamerianian pistol Kori got him isn't actually super cool and he's definitely not itching to try it out. (Yes, he sneaks you away to the batcave to shoot it. Yes, you end up making out. You dressed up and you look beautiful, sue him.)

He smiles when he blows out his candles and smiles even wider when Alfred blows out his.

You don't mention it when he takes the long way back to the apartment, only trace your thumb back and forth over his stomach. He drives a little faster when you do.

The whole day was perfect. He doesn't know how it was, his birthdays are never perfect. But as he lays down in the bed that you share at the end of the day, he realizes that he feels good. Just, he's content, happy. And it was you, and the people who love him, who made it that way.

He sighs softly, looking forward to cuddling with you and getting some well-deserved sleep. He doesn't have patrol tonight, after all.

"Jason," You call out as you step out of the bathroom. His eyes dart to you and he sits up immediately.

He breathes out your name, takes in every inch of you. You're wearing lingerie, and it's in his color. "It's that– baby," he stumbles over his words, every thought flying from his brain at the sight of lace and ribbons against your skin, "is that for me?"

You smile shyly at him, and he's over the moon, pushing off the bed to get closer to you, "Do you like?"

"I love it, I love you," he says firmly, eyes never leaving you. You giggle, echoing the words, as his heart practically sings in his chest and his hands find your waist. He knows he looks dumbfounded, and any thoughts of going to bed leave his mind.

Who needs to sleep? Not him, not when he has a few more hours of his birthday to enjoy with you. Not when he needs to make it clear, you're the greatest gift he could ever get.

[ryescapades]

Fun and cute idea for Narumi Gen little sister reader....

Little sister is on her period plus she's cranky, hangry, emotionally, etc.

Plus Soshiro(bf) and Gen were kinda worried so they have no choice but to work together to make the reader happy.

😂 just go crazy with this.

genre/warning: attempt at humor, reader in her period, cranky reader, everyone's dramatic here, just a teensy bit hint of suggestive, one mention of naruhoshi lol

a/n: ok i'm kind of impatient so here u go ,,simple and short! writing this while i'm also on my period -,-

mini series masterlist

to everyone, narumi gen is brash, occasionally childish and immature. but he's intuitive, efficient on the battlefield and has a strong sense of empathy and responsibility no matter how hard he tries to hide it.

one thing narumi is not, however, is incompetent. or at least, that's what he'd like to think.

"no."

the finality in your voice seems to grate even more at the final thread holding his sanity together.

"no??? what do you mean 'no'?!" narumi screeches, watching as you cross your arms with a haughty look on your face. "it means exactly what it is. no," you reiterate firmly.

"you asked me to order takeout for you and it's already on the way here, and now you're saying you don't want it anymore?" your brother scowls, daring you to repeat that word again. and you do, of course.

"uh-huh. don't wanna,"

he clenches his jaw, irritation bleeding out of his pores. "fine! what do you want then?"

"..."

his eye twitches at your silence. "oi."

"--iro..."

"you gotta speak louder, kid. can't hear you if you keep mumbling like that." your forehead creases, not liking his condescending tone. "i said i want soshiro," you state firmly.

narumi's eyes widen, flabbergasted. he waits for a few seconds, just in case you're messing with him, then you're gonna break the tension with a 'just kidding, bro! i actually want that takeout, how about we eat it together?' but there's none.

no kidding, no takeout, no eating together. nada.

narumi feels that last piece of thread snapping off.

"oh, you—" a loud, prolonged groan of frustration and defeat fills the room.

∘₊✧─────────────✧₊∘

the first division's captain has never felt this exposed and bare, ever. his dignity has been stripped away; he's vulnerable and unguarded.

that's how downgrading it feels to ask hoshina soshiro for his help in order to tame the beastly monster scarier than a kaiju that is you on your period.

"you're being overdramatic," the vice-captain's voice crackles out from the phone narumi's holding to his ear.

the captain grits his teeth, almost to the point of chattering. "shut up! i didn't ask to be in this situation! if it were up to me, the thought of asking for you wouldn't even cross my mind!" he complains.

"put yourself in her shoes too, captain. no women ever asked to struggle so much during their periods in the first place," hoshina says, amused.

"tch, i know that! but that doesn't mean that devil spawn can go around tormenting me as she likes. i knew i should've thrown her into a ditch when i got the chance," narumi harshly mutters before re-entering his office where you're waiting.

"i heard that, dumbass!" you growl from your seat at your brother's desk. not wanting to back down, gen sneers back, "i meant that for you to hear, you spoiled brat!"

"guys," hoshina interrupts loudly enough from the other line, starting to feel agitated himself.

you immediately snatch the phone, ignoring gen's protests before putting the device to your ear and swiveling in the chair to face away from him. "you don't love me, is that it, soshiro?" you interrogate with a frown, shoulders drooping and voice trembling slightly.

your boyfriend lets out a nervous chuckle, "sweetheart, please. cut your brother some slack, yeah? he's tryin' his best, and i'm here now. anything ya need?"

your eyes then narrow suspiciously. "huh? stop talking about gen. why are you talking about him? you want him or something?" you bombard, suddenly feeling protective of your brother.

narumi jerks back, appalled at what he’s hearing. "the hell you on about?" you wave him off with a brush of your hand before focusing back on the call. "i asked you a question, soshiro."

hoshina sighs, "you know i do love you, darlin'. now how about you answer my question, hm?"

narumi just surveys on the side with his arms crossed, tapping his foot as he waits impatiently to get his phone back. funnily enough, his expression morphs from boredom, to annoyed, to disgusted as he notices your cheeks flushing as the conversation progresses.

it doesn't take a genius to guess that whatever hoshina's talking about, it's nothing decent.

right as he's about to interject, you're already pulling the device away to put it on speaker, letting narumi hear the well-known kansai dialect.

"alright, so ya good to eat that food he ordered now?" hoshina questions. "yeah, think so. whatever," you finally agree albeit sulkily, and narumi almost falls down to his hands and knees to thank the vice-captain, if not for his next words.

"that's a good girl," your boyfriend hums, sending you blushing down to the tips of your toes and narumi fuming with genuine horror (hoshina certainly did that on purpose).

"WHAT IN THE FUCKING HE—"

you abruptly end the call, fully satisfied with yourself.

well, at least that’s one of narumi's problems finally down.

taglist: @maruflix ©🅁🅈🄴🅂🄲🄰🄿🄰🄳🄴🅂. do not steal, translate or repost my work anywhere else !

[spdrvyn]

out and about: MIGUEL O'HARA

a short drabble about miguel making time to go on a shopping spree with you in a newly opened mall, however you can't help but feel a little shopper's guilt while he's there.

it's been a busy last couple of months to say the least, miguel hadn't been on a proper date with you for a while. you said that you were doing just fine, but he always had a sixth sense about this.

besides, while he was tending to his job of being a multiversal protector, he's neglected his other (and arguably more important) job. being a supportive and present boyfriend.

he forced himself to clear his calendar, turned on DND mode on all of his devices for once, and got into something that wasn't a skin tight nanotech suit. you'd been overjoyed to discover that miguel had stayed home today, moreso when he told you to get ready because he'd be taking you to the mall to buy a couple of things.

a couple of things was an understatement.

whenever you kept your eyes too long on a certain shop, miguel would usher you in to look around a little. if you so much as touched an item, miguel would already be at the cashier and buying it for you. it went on like that for the entire trip.

bag upon bag hung onto miguel's arms, yet he didn't even seem to struggle. it was attractive, but made you all the more guilty because what if he wasn't actually enjoying this? sure, he brought some items along with you, but what if those purchases were to just spare your feelings?

not to mention that the mall was practically colossal in size. if you said that you wanted to go home, miguel would be thinking that he'd done something wrong. that would be even worse. to add on, you haven't even checked if this place had a book store and miguel knows well that you can't leave a mall without taking a peak which would make him even more suspicious.

you also had to stop at a cafe every now and again to let your throbbing legs rest from walking around the whole time, miguel probably had more weighing on his back. you despised the fact that you were stealing his precious time, you couldn't begin to imagine what could be happening back at his workplace without him. would those people manage to survive? would the multiverse survive?

after visiting the last shop of the day, you were relieved to finally have an excuse to tell him that you were tired and wanted to go back home. miguel understood that, but your silence the whole car ride back was deafening. he thought for sure that this would mean a lot to you, the mall felt tailored to your interests, you'd bought a lot.

why weren't you happy?

what did he do wrong?

you insisted on helping him bring the bags back in, which he indulged you to. after setting them all back into the flat, it was already dark. miguel assisted you in unboxing everything you bought, which you did with a sullen look on your face. especially when you were done, looking over all the unwrapped items, how your pile was so much bigger than his. it could bring you to tears. and it did.

as miguel wrapped an arm around you, he felt it. the slight shiver in your shoulders, the muffled hiccup, and the glossiness on your eyes. worry settled in his features, he pulled you closer to him. "hey, hey. what's wrong? you don't like the stuff i—"

you burst into a fit of sobs, face going red and eyes puffed. you desperately tried to wipe away the tears that streamed down, as you whimpered. "i love it, miguel! i love it so much, but- it's just–"

god, he hated seeing you like this. not because you looked ugly crying or because he found it annoying but because of his incompetence. he had one fucking job, way simpler than whatever he did at work. to make you happy, to make you content, this wasn't what he wanted.

"don't cry, please. i'm sorry, lo siento, por favor. baby, if there is anything else i can do for you, i'll do it."

"that's the thing! you've already done so much for me today, you're so– so nice, too nice, that- that i don't know how to give it back."

your crying had eased a little, miguel's face had softened. he's been trying compensate for how little he's been giving you, that's all, but he didn't think about how you are. maybe he's been too nice recently, but you're too nice all the time.

"you don't have to give anythig i do back, mi vida," he sighed as he moved his hands to cup your cheeks, thumbs rubbing the fat of your cheek as your remaining tears smeared across the skin. "just you being here is enough, it's just that i've been— a little absent lately. i wanted to make it up to you."

"you didn't have to do that, miguel. just you being here is enough for me too." you sniffled. god, you were too adorable for him to take at times. he leaned in and pressed a small kiss to the bridge of your nose, to each of your cheeks, then moving down to press one quickly to your lips.

"let's just do that then," he murmured, "be with each other. s'all i need, all i want." and you agreed. wholeheartedly so.

dividers by across-the-art-verse

[overload-explode]

Naruto Founder's s/o who Attempted S*icide

T/W: Hinted non-explicit suicide attempt, references to depression

A/N: I'm not in a good space so here is some angst to vent! These men were born and raised during war and political instability, so their understanding of mental health is terrible. GN! reader

Hashirama:

You were the light of his life always laughing and smiling

Whenever he was stressed with Hokage duties he took refuge in you

He never sensed anything was wrong until you tried to kill yourself

He's the one that found you and healed you

The village was supposed to be a safe place for his loved ones yet you were not safe in the village he built

He blames himself. He feels like your happiness, and everyone in his village is his responsibility. He's your partner and your Hokage

Away from you, he starts drinking and gambling a lot to forget what happened and distract himself

Tobirama has to eventually find him and sober him up

His brother informs him that he needs to stop being self-destructive and blaming himself for what happened

Bags are now permanently under his eyes. He clings to you in sleep now, not out of love, but because he's terrified of losing you like he has lost so many

He's lost brothers, family and friends to war. To protect his loved ones was one of the reasons for creating the village But he can't protect you from yourself

He is an amazing healer so there are no physical scars on you. However, every time he sees you, he sees those injuries on you- he is forever scared mentally

He loves you and he drains himself trying to keep you happy

He doesn't show you he is struggling at all, he is scared his depression will cause you to spiral downward and attempt to take your life again

So he puts on a happy, joyous and carefree mask. Now he is performing at home as well as performing as Hokage and clan head

He secretly asks Tobirama to watch you when he is unable to. Tobirama starts to dislike you. You burden his brother, himself and the village. To him you are a liability, a weakness of his brother and a danger to the village. He would never hurt anyone his brother loves but he advises Hashirama to break up with you and tries to convince you to leave Hashirama, and preferably the village

Tobirama

He's angry and he's disappointed but mostly at himself because he feels so powerless

Despite being an amazing tactician, he didn't predict and prevent this. He feels so inadequate and starts doubting himself

Ever the logical man, he sees there's a problem and he wants to fix it. And nothing will get in the way, not even you

However, emotions do not follow logical thought, and you cannot apply cold logic to something as complicated as mental health

To you, he visibly becomes colder and more distant however he is trying to do the opposite. He expresses his love through acts of service but he is so emotionally incompetent it comes off as him being controlling, which he is but he wants to help you. He just has no idea how

He never opens up about his mental health. The trauma of being a child soldier, having an abusive father, trying to protect his brothers from abuse, losing his brothers, his alienation from being albino and autistic (my headcanon), PTSD, his strained relationship with his brother…

In his mind, as long as you can do your job as a shinobi, housewife, or merchant… and contribute to your village and/or clan, you are fine. Happiness and personal fulfilment come from knowing your place and fulfilling you are not contributing then that is a problem. If you're not doing your duty then that is a problem that needs to be fixed

He views people like cogs in a machine, if you are not doing your job then that is a problem. If you are doing your job, then there is no problem

He'll make sure you are physically well and then try to get you back to work because then that means everything is fixed

He will never talk about it, he wants to forget it, ignore it suppress it- like all his other emotions

But secretly, when he can, he'll create a shadow clone to follow you around to make sure you're safe

He will also put a seal on you that allows him to teleport to you if he senses that you're in danger. If you refuse he'll do it anyway without your permission because it's the smart thing to do and he cares about you. Your safety is more important to him than you liking him

At night when he comes back late and you are fast asleep, he'll hold you and silently cry a bit because he doesn't want to lose you.

You will never find out, he wants to be strong for both of you. In his mind no emotions = strong

In his mind, you have too many emotions, so he needs to show even fewer emotions to avoid triggering you. This is very unhealthy for everyone

After his brother advises him, he tries to be more outwardly affectionate. Even though he doesn't understand the need of pointing out the obvious, he compliments you more and kisses you on the forehead before going to work every day. Just know that he loves you

Madara

Hashirama is the one to tell Madara about your attempt. He was the medic-nin that saved you and, mainly, because everyone else is too scared of Madara to tell him

Madara is angry and scared. He is one of the most powerful shinobi to have ever existed. He has one of the most powerful Kekkei Genkai, yet he couldn't protect you. He can't protect you from yourself

The way he deals with his feelings of powerlessness is to label you unworthy

If you let your thoughts almost kill you- then you are truly weak. He grew up in a war zone where everyone was trying to kill him and he's perfectly fine! (He's not)

While you recover, he'll check up on you and make sure you're healing but he won't talk about what happened at all. Once you physically recover from your attempt, he'll break up with you

He's the clan head and his future spouse would become the clan matriarch (or the gender-neutral equivalent), taking on a lot of roles and responsibilities. Madara can't have someone he views as weak representing the Uchiha, it would make the Uchiha seem vulnerable and his job is ultimately to protect the clan. Madara also worries that the stress from the job will worsen you're mental health

After the break up he'll disappear for your life completely. If you try to visit him he will never be in. He won't be in his office if you're there- you won't even see him out in the street. It will be like you were never together

Secretly, he will start stalking you because he's worried but has no idea how to help you

He stops eating or sleeping regularly because he's too worried. Also, you were the one to remind him to eat and drink. His own physical and mental health declines

Hashirama becomes increasingly worried about his friend and tries to convince Madara to talk to you

Madara has already lost Izuna and the rest of his family, he can't lose you too. He knocks on your door with some food hoping you'll start the conversation

If you like my work, please consider supporting me: ☕

[tubbytarchia]

want to hear your thoughts on jimmy and joel. all your thoughts. all of them. across universes.

You ask you shall receive. I love them a lot

I can see them as a ship (and no Joel white knight can come at me when those two frequently engage in questionable exchanges) but mostly I see them as best friends with a brotherly bond. Joel is kinda similar to Martyn to me when thinking of Jimmy, where he's always been there and taken him for who he is and just fucked around, carefree. He's a mean bean but his banter doesn't give off maliciousness, to me he hasn't ever seemed as overstepping and making Jimmy genuinely upset

Unfortunately ESMP2 happened and it really pains me how much Joel drove the "toy Jimmy" bit into the ground, resulting in all the seriousness that Jimmy wasn't ever offered. Maybe Jimmy wouldn't have become as much of a joke as he was were it not for Joel. Maybe it would have all hurt a bit less if Joel hadn't built massive walls around Tumble Town. This does pain me always, but you know what, at least "bullying Jimmy" is not his shtick that he needs to rely on throughout various SMPs as much as it feels like certain other people do. He decided to lean into it this once wirh some thought that wasn't just "haha Jimmy sux!!" but unfortunately it devolved and absolutely everyone went along with his bit. But as far as Joel goes, from a brotherly sort of friendship perspective especially, this kind of teasing and banter is more excusable than it would be within a romantic ship etc, but regardless it still pains me lol

Aside from that though, they're buds... Joel I don't think could ever comfort Jimmy in any decent way just because of being the rabid creature that he is, even if he were to know of and understand Jimmy's horrors (to the best of his ability). But what matters is that he cares... He doesn't ever express this outwardly but he cares and that makes me happy and enjoy them as a duo. Things like how in Limited Life he really wanted to help Jimmy get some time to stay in the game longer and his downward red life spiral pretty much beginning with Jimmy's death. How in Secret Life he expresses confidence in Jimmy having his back, and how in spite of his anguish after Lizzie's death, he doesn't say anything to ruin Jimmy's fun upon him not being the first one out. Even when Jimmy's not there, all he says is "Jimmy's gloating about it, which is a weird thing to gloat about? But we have to give him every little win, don't we"

Also in 3rd Life, Jimmy kind of jokingly (I guess??) left a sign on Joel's property that just said "I miss you - Love from Solidarity" and I never stop thinking about it. It pains me a lot, especially when that came before the FH ordeal kicked into proper gear. It honestly reads like one last effort to get away from something awful that he's anticipating, for someone to help? Something something canary, he's sensing the danger. But Joel is stupid lol and I can't blame him for not paying that sign any mind. Anyway this is a stretch I just. I never stop thinking about it.........this reads like a cry for help..........

It genuinely surprises me when I think back to the traffic series' and realize how little Joel has made fun of Jimmy. Sure he laughs, with him it's more excusable because of their friendship, and yet somehow he doesn't make a fool of or comment on Jimmy's reputation as much as some others do. He doesn't seem to think Jimmy to be notably incompetent like some of the others do. Can't say too much on other SMPs because I've seen very little of them but the vibes seem to be more or less same. I love them a lot anon, I love them a lot... Joel, for a change, is someone Jimmy deserves (because he deserves someone who cares) and is fortunate to have, if only it weren't for all the unrelenting horrors that Joel can't really help with in any case. Pensive

[skzdarlings]

ooooohhh!!! that ask game is so fun!!! I have so so so many questions about all your fics and thought processes, I'd spend all week asking you everything I wanna know and picking your brain!! your so talented and I feel like I'd learn so much!! but imma contain myself to just one..... (maybe two, but I don't want to overwhelm you!)

↻ FLIP FLOP: send me a scene from one of my fics and I’ll describe or write it from another character’s POV!

right from the beginning I've been so so curious about Felix's POV in The Bodyguard series and there's so so so many moments I'd want to see from his perspective, but the one I'm most curious about is when the reader gets taken by Miroh's men and he chases after her and rescues her then drives into a cornfield to fuck her.... that whole sequence had me out of my MIND and I would LOVE to see it from Felix's pov. like, i HAVE to know what he was thinking and feeling throughout all of that!! (if that's something you're up for, obviously 😊)

I'm sorry to hear the writing isn't going well, i know how that feels. but I hope you know that you are superb and an inspiration!! I hope you have a wonderful week!! 🫶🏼🫶🏼

-yongbbokkie 🤗💙

ahhhhh love ya thank you so much!! your username popping up always delights me, send me anything bc i am more than happy to answer!! <333

i will probably just describe rather than write the scene bc lbr i can't be trusted not to drop another 100k words, but YES. that scene! oh wow where to start. this is gonna be a long rant lol sorry

felix slowly develops a lot of feelings and emotions over the course of that story, not just romantic ones but also sadness and anger and fear. by that chapter in the story, it is clear he is starting to feel everything a lot more strongly than he did before. that includes a lot of frustration, anger, and resentment towards reader's father and his operation. reader even mentions felix's frustration with her father's men, that he thinks they're badly organized and incompetent and that he's better than them. felix also seems to think similarly of her father. i do not think he is even a little bit happy to be trapped in this bargain lol

said father definitely underestimates felix overall. he thinks he has a well-behaved guard dog on a leash and is seemingly unaware he has barely managed to tether a very dangerous and angry wolf.

in that scene, when she first texts felix her whereabouts, felix's reply is mostly dry and a little annoyed (he isn't happy when he gets behind). he says something like 'thats what your father gets for sending his men to watch you.'

he turns on her location so her father's men can pick her up. he would be the first to see when she suddenly changes direction, moving too quickly away from the scene. he probably tries to contact her but obviously gets no reply.

he immediately knows something is wrong. he knows her. he isn't surprised by her initially slipping away (hence his dry retort) but he knows she runs so someone will find her, that she acts out so she will get attention, so it makes no sense she would turn and run now.

he knows it's not right. he tries reporting it but gets ignored, hand-waved, her father's team eye-rolling and saying they have it under control, that she's just being a pest like always. he knows that's not true. he knows her too well and this is not her. when her location tracking abruptly stops in place, it confirms it for him.

he knows there's zero point in trying to get through the arrogant blockheads so he takes matters into his own hands. he takes a truck - i imagine there are landscapers who upkeep the property and there was one nearby - and he swings in and drives off.

felix was not just another worker under miroh but a very particular kind. i imagine he knows miroh's maps of the city different than someone else. when he tracks her last known direction, it's like the rest of the map glows on the screen. it's practically second-nature to fill in the gaps.

there is a part of him that probably doesn't want it to be true - doesn't want to risk going back that way, doesn't want to know who's waiting on the other end, doesn't want everything with miroh to blow up in his face now when he isn't ready for it.

but more than all that, he can't lose her. and he certainly won't lose her to miroh the way he lost everything else. he goes straight towards the facility he knows exists, quickly and swiftly finding the car that took her.

i think there's a part of the old felix that comes back during that confrontation, that the adrenaline of the entire encounter and the threat it poses completely takes over him.

i think it isn't until she's in his arms that it goes away, that he realizes they're both here and alive and that tonight could have gone very, very, very differently. i think a part of him was expecting it. he has been resigned to his own death for a long while, before he even came to this household, and when she throws herself at him with all that passion and affection it's probably the first time he realizes he really, really doesn't want to die after all.

they're sitting in that car and he tells her father that he has her, that she's safe, that he'll bring her home. i think all his options and possible paths run through his head in the split second before he turns the phone off - considers bringing her right back home and pretending none of this happened, considers driving off with her and never looking back, or -

what he does, which is give into the adrenaline and passion and newfound life right now. he doesn't want something to happen before he's been with her the way he can't stop thinking about. she's a terrifying firework of emotion and bravery and insanity and he doesn't understand her half the time but he wants to, and it's absolutely crazy to him that she would ever look twice in his direction.

(he probably thinks he owes chris a huge apology because, whoops, turns out it's really easy to lose your sense after all.)

he probably tells himself it will only happen that one time because he intends to go back to being solemn and alone etc etc... of course, she's not gonna let that happen, as she drags that half-feral wolf kicking and clawing into a semblance of human happiness - but that comes with time, of which they eventually have a lot ;)

[thatswhatsushesaid]

do you think NHS will ever be satisfied with the way things have turned out in the end? or is he already? I've seen polar opinions on this one and honestly can't decide which one I like more

oooh, what crunchy questions, anon.

short answer: I think he thinks he's satisfied.

the tl;dr answer: I don't think it's possible for us to know with any degree of certainty how nhs feels about anything post-canon, because the text gives us almost no insight into his interiority outside of wwx's speculation in the aftermath of the guanyin temple sequence. but I think we can make some educated guesses based on what we do know about his character.

rather than just rewrite stuff I've already written on this subject before, I'll drop some links to previous posts that I think are relevant to your ask:

nhs took so long to enact his revenge quest because he could not make up his mind about what he wanted to do. also this one, which includes discussion of his cql performance as well. indecisiveness is as core to nhs's character as his desire for vengeance, and I think that extends to his feelings about his situation post-canon, too.

this is definitely more within the realm of headcanon and speculation but I went deep on this the magnus archives-mdzs fusion reblog speculating on why I think nhs would be an avatar of the hunt, and a big thing about the hunt is that once the hunt is over, the hunters... don't really know what to do with themselves. womp womp.

now on to the point I don't think I've spilt much digital ink on yet:

nhs is, and always has been, a people person. this is extremely obvious when you dip back into the gusu lan summer camp for wayward young cultivators chapters, where nhs is at his most effervescent when he is bopping around the cloud recesses as wwx and jc's bubbly tag-along, lamenting how much lwj and lqr clearly hate wwx while cheerfully offering to give wwx more porn to make up for what he's lost. (it was nhs's porn, too! he'd be justified in being a bit cheesed off about it, but he really isn't!) if he sees a didi-shaped hole in a prospective friends' group, he sees an opportunity to make himself lovably indispensable as the court appointed littlest brother no one asked for, and quite frankly who could blame him? he loves to be spoiled and doted on, but imo there's some clear self-awareness and reciprocity at work in these dynamics that goes beyond a desire just to be pampered and looked after. I suppose an uncharitable read on teen!nhs would be that he's lazy and manipulative and finds easy marks to do the heavy lifting for him so he can sleep and paint and catch birds for his private collection, but tbh I think that interpretation does his character dirty. most people who end up spoiling and doting on nhs in the text are clearly happy to do so and seem to get something out of making life easier for this charmingly incompetent dandy. good for him--and for them!

...and then, post-canon, he is a people person without any people around him. sure, we can presume the existence of some unnamed nie sect subordinates who are stuck dealing with a sect leader who allowed his sect to languish and decline in the years after nmj's death, but I think if any of those unnamed subordinates were inclined to be people nhs could rely on to fill the 3zun and/or wwx and jc-shaped voids in his life, we'd at least know their names. I think it is telling that we don't, and that the last meaningful interaction we see between nhs and the characters who used to be his closest friends in the text amounts to an interrogation. whatever affection wwx used to feel for nhs has clearly withered on the vine and has been replaced by mistrust and suspicion--to say nothing of lxc's dead-eyed silence as soon as he begins to put the pieces together.

also: the last glimpse we get of nhs in the text before he disappears from the story altogether is him picking up jgy's hat and walking off with it. why does he do this? why is this the very last thing we see him do in the story? there are a few different possibilities:

"he's taking the hat to keep as a trophy!" I mean. maybe? I suppose I can't entirely rule out this possibility, but it is the least interesting one to me because it glosses over the complexity of nhs's pre-existing relationship to jgy.

"nhs doesn't know why he picks up the hat and takes it with him. he just does it." this is the idea I vibe with the most because it is most consistent with my read on his character--namely that he is never 100% sure about anything (except what qualifies as good erotica). but I think the part of him that still cares about jgy (it's there! it's tiny and shrivelled and warped by his transformation into the wuxia version of montresor, but it's still there) does not want to see his hat abandoned in the mud and dirt, and also does not want to interrogate his feelings about why he feels that way that closely.

"nhs can't abide littering! he's doing his part to keep the city streets clean." doubt.jpeg

[lovelylichabee]

Good morning I have some headcanons for yall about the archives crew (mostly Martin bc I love him) in no particular order. Be warned there are some spoilers for throughout the series.

- Martin has ADHD so things like audio processing and object permanence are a challenge, and Jon being unaware of this is one of the reasons he thinks Martin is incompetent in the beginning. Because what else do you think of someone who takes twice as long to type out transcripts than his peers, or who can't focus on the follow up research assigned to him sometimes, yet other times focuses so much on it he forgets to take his lunch? Plus the man "loses" files on his desk (because to Martin he just sees a stack of uniform files and getting used to Gertrude's weird looking date-based labels as an organization system compared to the Dewey Decimal System they had in the library is damn difficult!) Upon learning he has ADHD though Jon finds that with some accommodations, Martin is actually decent at doing what he needs to for his job and feels a bit guilty for being such an ass.

- Tim was the first friend Jon made upon being hired into research which to Jon is weird because he's always had a hard time making friends (partially because he's autistic and partially because he hasn't had the routine environment to try to make friends since college). Tim is also a pretty opposite personality to him, so to Jon it felt sort of like when you meet a dog and the dog likes you *way* before you like the dog, but then he grows on you so you kinda sigh and go "Yeah yeah, we're friends"

- Sasha and Tim's hookup never grew to anything more because Sasha didn't know how to tell Tim she was aromantic without possibly hurting his feelings (meanwhile if she had just told him, he would've been fine with it and happy to be in whatever kind of relationship with her, qpp or otherwise). She never gets to tell him, so that's another reason why Tim never caught the differences between Sasha and Not!Sasha when Not!Sasha suddenly had a boyfriend (besides you know the reason that Stranger Rules that says only one person usually notices the difference).

- Jon doesn't like coffee black coffee but drinks it anyways mostly because he has always been told "if you add sugar and/or creamer to your coffee then you don't like coffee you like sugar and creamer" so to keep appearances and insisting he does like coffee, he never adds anything unless he's sure no one will see. Really, he likes black coffee with a bit of sugar because the sweetness gives the flavors something to travel on so he can appreciate them more because otherwise they're overpowered by bitterness. He doesn't like tea because drinking it feels like he's just rubbed tea leaves all over the inside of his mouth and it leaves behind a dry feeling that he hates.

- Martin's pure lonely domain wouldve been a rainy, foggy moorsland kind of environment where its very pretty but you feel like you're walking over the same hills and you feel like you see houses in the distance but you never get any closer to the chimney smoke you see peeking above the fog. You're also always damp and the air feels heavy, and you don't have an umbrella. But for just those moments when youre standing on tops of the hills, looking out to the rest of the environment though, you wonder why you'd ever want to leave somewhere so pretty, even if it is rather lonely, and far too quiet. It's a reminiscent kind of quiet, where you reflect on why you're walking alone here in the first place and not inside one of those houses in the distance with the chimney smoke... and then you keep walking because maybe if you make it there, they'll be kind and let you inside, and you can shake off all of this chilly dampness by their fireplace and company.

- Danny is Tim's best kept secret after he dies. Tim stops talking about his family after that, gets really quiet when the topic is brought up in conversation, but he's still careful not to look upset even if his shoulders tense a bit when he smiles and says something along the lines of "Nah, I don't have much family anymore" when he's asked. Their parents passed away some time after Danny was gone (by natural causes), and Tim never forgave himself for not being able to get back at whatever killed him before they passed, so he doesn't feel it's right to be allowed to talk about them until he does, like some kind of mission he has to finish before he can let himself grieve properly.

- Peter and Elias either are or were married, but with the way they act its very hard to tell if they are actually divorced or just on the brink of it because of how they interact with one another, leading to the rumor that they keep divorcing and getting remarried frequently spreading around the office. Elias knows it frustrates Peter to have attention on them like that so he doesn't stop the rumors, and sometimes actively encourages them when they're in another one of their "divorced" periods. Peter doesn't actually ever fully leave though because he considers the relationship more transactional and useful, than anything nearing "love". They have their soft moments together though, brief little moments of understanding, very privately, and never discussed again after they happen. Elias misses him after he dies, even if Peter was trying to get him killed.

- Tim could've gone Desolation if the idea of serving an entity didn't disgust him. Choosing to serve an entity is a choice that you have to make, and Tim could see in Jon what doing that does to a person, and what people serving the Stranger did to his brother (even if he didnt know exactly what it was). Even if Jon didn't really start accepting being The Archivist until after his coma, Tim was alive before then and knew that it had changed him. Plus experiencing some of the other entities (being attacked by "worms", being in the tunnels, being in Michael's hallways, dealing with Jon's paranoia and stalking, being in the unknowing and seeing what happened to Danny), he has seen what kinds of effects these entities have on people. The Desolation likely did call out to him in that moment of the explosion, and he spat in its face because he'd literally rather die than ever give himself to something like that.

- Personally, I like big but short Martin who is a bit stronger than he looks because of hefting around file boxes in the archives. I imagine "the stacks" being a bunch of shelves sort of like a library but instead of books, there are boxes that fit in, with the files inside of them, but they're left a bit open and uncovered because air flow and climate controlled environment. I don't know if that's how it works bit that's how I imagine it. And then there's a lot of file boxes sort of stacked on top of one another on the ground and stacks of files also on the ground because that archive is an unrealistic mess and sort of ridiculous. But yeah. Big but short Martin who has some hidden muscle.

- Honestly if I imagine them all standing next to each other, Tim is the tallest, Sasha is only an inch or 2 inches shorter, Jon is a bit shorter than Sasha, like up to her shoulder, and Martin is the shortest and needs help getting things off the top shelves from the other three because he wobbles too much on the step ladder and it makes him nervous (another reason Jon likely finds him a bit irritating in the beginning).

- Jon's hair starts off short and very proper but grows out a bit in season 2 because he's too busy being paranoid to take care of himself. He gets a haircut when staying with Georgie in S3, and then his hair grows out a bit again while he's kidnapped, and he doesn't cut it again before The Unknowning. It grows to his shoulders during his coma. He doesn't take that good of care of it leaves it long until the Buried, where he has to cut it all off. He doesn't cut it again and he takes à bit better care of it after being rejected by Martin. It grows abnormally quickly leading to it being past his shoulders and with some natural curl by the time he and Martin do actually run away to the safe house. He wears it up most of the time during S5.

- Martin's hair is loosely curly and a ginger orange or strawberry blonde but fades to white as he gets pulled further into the Lonely by Peter Lukas. When hes working in the office under Peter and Jon asks him to run away together, its very washed out but not fully white, and when Jon rescues him from Peter's Lonely, it is pure white, and slowly fades back to its natural color once they are together and they get to the safe house, though a patch of it remains pure white up in the front of his hair, as if he had Poliosis. In his s5 domain when he's talking to himself, Lonely!Martin continues to have fully white hair.

- I have more but this is already pretty long so I'll stop here and if people care about this I'll answer asks or do another one.

[dualityvn]

How would Keith respond to an MC who doesn’t believe they deserve/doesn’t know how to respond to romantic attention? Like, they’re dating Keith and they know they’re dating, but every time Keith tries to give them a gift or do something affectionate in public or anything, they just get this weird stare and start acting very coldly. But it’s not because they don’t like Keith, it’s just because they don’t believe that anyone could really be that seriously into them and they kind of worry that Keith is doing all of this to make fun of them.

Happy Valentine's Day! Here is pain!

(GN!MC x Keith)

Keith stared down at the bouquet in his hands. He'd tried to make this one the most beautiful bouquet he could come up with. He'd tried to add the flowers he'd seen you admire when you visited the flower shop. Since all the bouquets he'd made based on symbolism in the past hadn't been to your liking. He'd hoped that maybe, just maybe, this one would make you smile. But it hadn't. You'd hit him with that same blank expression and your voice had gone ice cold, tearing into him like a sharp blade.

Maybe he'd been too dumb to notice that you hated flowers.

He'd tried chocolate, he'd tried carefully written poems, homemade food shaped like hearts and roses, even things he'd had a hard time affording, but had saved up for. It always got the same reaction out of you. Did you just not like gifts? But you seemed to dislike the dates he poured so much effort into as well. The romantic dinners, the picnics, the boat rides at sunset.

You didn't enjoy any of it.

Was it just him? Perhaps that was it. It was because all these things came from him that you didn't like them. And yet you'd stuck by his side somehow, despite his incompetence and constant failures.

Then, an idea hit him. Maybe there was a type of gift that you would enjoy. One that wouldn't make you sneer or frown or look away.

× × ×

You can't stand this day. Valentine's Day. Everyone made sure to boast about the gifts they got, the events they had planned with their lovers. It only reminds you that no one would do something like that for you sincerely.

You can only feel relief when it's time for you to get home, away from all the hearts, roses, chocolate, and kisses.

You unlock your door and drag your feet in with a sigh. At last, some peace. In the process of taking off your shoes, you notice a red spot on the floor.

You frown. It couldn't be, could it? You finish removing your shoes and crouch down. That's when you also notice the metallic smell in the air. Looking up, you realise it isn't just one spot. Drops of blood trail down your entire hallway, like rose petals, leading to your bedroom.

You can feel the color drain from your face as dread spreads through your body. Slowly, you tip toe around the blood and approach your bedroom door. Fearing the worst, you push it open.

What you find there isn't a dead body or a blood thirsty serial killer. It's your boyfriend, Keith. He's sitting on the bed, shirtless, with several cuts decorating his entire torso. They spell "I love you," followed by your name, which looks to have been carved in deeper than the rest of the words. There's still blood trailing out of them and onto his red stained pants. His eyes are full of tears, most likely from the pain, but he is smiling.

"You didn't like the flowers, so I thought I'd try something different this time. Don't worry, I laid out towels on the bed so I wouldn't stain the sheets. Happy Valentine's Day, my love!"

[leviiackrman]

UQUIZ CATCH UP;

Okay so I’ve fallen really behind in a bunch of tag games that I was tagged in by a variety of people: @corvosattano @roofgeese @chuckhansen @fenharel @minaharkers @denerims @simonxriley (and probably more) but why not have a mass post of them!? Thank you sm for the tags beloveds, I’m sorry I’m such a slow old gal🤍 doing this for my brain rot bbies but also my newest kiddo - Kaida!

Tagging (only if you want to, I have no idea who’s done these): @sstewyhosseini @risingsh0t @florbelles @queennymeria @river-ward @confidentandgood @indorilnerevarine @liurnia @marivenah @noonfaerie @detectivelokis @jinfromyarikawa @nokstella @solasan @shadowglens @jackiesarch @shellibisshe @arklay @arthrmorgann @jennystahl @jendoe @phillipsgraves @jacobseed @necroticpetals @heroofpenamstan @hunterhorn @kingsroad @unholymilf @baldurians + @blissfulalchemist

Q1: what planet are you? || Q2: which type of protagonist are you? || Q3: how is your soul perceived? || Q4: what kind of time loop are you stuck in? || Q5: why do people love you? || Q6: what kind of complex do you have? || Q7: darkest desires || Q8: what’s your underlying motif?

Q1: SATURN;

patient. stable. reliable. preserving and diligent. your capacity to hold focus on something you choose to is unmatched by all other planets. you were made for hard work that you love and that you know is rewarding. you are the shoulder that everyone wants to cry on, so remember you can lean on yourself when it seems there is no one else. there is nothing wrong with being self sufficient. you are justice and evenly balanced scales.

Q2: THE PRODIGY;

now this is most like the child protagonist who witnesses complete incompetence and feels so trapped in it that they have to find their way to a better tomorrow (all by themselves). whether it's wit, intelligence, creativity, privilege, or skill, you use your assets to their utmost, usually under the guidance of someone who knows how to hold you back just enough. you've earned your triumphs, and your adventures help you find power and control where before there was none. and sure, the arrogance can be quirky, but like, in very small doses.

Q3: THE STRONG-WILLED;

your soul has touched darkness and so you learned to wrap yourself within it. you felt fear and decided you would never let it control you again. you're not always all sharp edges and cool stares, but you refuse to be prey again. you turned your teeth into fangs so you would be the one to bite. you learned to growl louder than all the predators who stole your innocence. it may seem like you don't care, sometimes you try to pretend you don't, but i see the way you sharpen your knives when the ones you care about are hurting.

Q4: MODERN DARK COMEDY;

happy birthday! where has the time gone? another year older, another year wiser. happy birthday! another year down, and eternity to go. happy birthday! maybe this year will be different, you have 365 days to find out. clock’s ticking! happy birthday!

Q5: BECAUSE THEY CAN’T LIVE WITHOUT YOU;

yours is an obsessive type of love. people find themselves completely enthralled by you and your presence in their life. they can't imagine their life without you in it, and they'll do anything to keep you. it's the kind of love that makes them feel like they're suffocating when it's taken away. be careful with that power.

Q6: SUPERIORITY COMPLEX;

grow up. you're worse than everyone else.

Q7: FOR EVERYTHING TO BE REAL;

you grew up so immersed fantastical realms that now you have to imagine yourself in them each night so that you can fall asleep. it's a comfort you've never been able to sever. but the reality you were given wasn't made for you. it's time to create a new one.

Q8: THE LIGHTNING ROD;

whether it’s your turbulent nature, your flash quick mind, or the air of unknown about you, your undercurrent is the lightning rod. you are somewhat unpredictable, but if we unravelled we’d see you know exactly what you’re doing, but it’s makes you feel less vulnerable to pretend it wasn’t planned. some people stay back from you, but others would follow you cross country, for the very same reason. they don’t know enough about you. the difference is in who wants to learn more. keep your golden nature, it’s exciting, but don’t be afraid to admit what you know. matshona dhliwayo said “lightning strikes but does not roar” your bite will always be worse than your bark, keep that close to your chest.

Q1: EARTH;

nurturing, generous and caring. introverted, tolerant, honest and trustworthy. you are "my phone is always on, call me any time." you are "i feel like i'm everyone's therapist." you are impressive with your stability and and peacefulness. you are wallpapers of cows and fields of ever-growing seeds. you are the best friend. mother nature. ice cold water and the smell of rain.

Q2: OVERPOWERED SWEETHEART;

you were probably gifted from birth, but humble about it. whatever it is--alien sun, parents with powers, or what i like to call the taco tuesday special (fell at breakneck speed into a radioactive vat of chemicals immediately upon birth)--your origins played a big part of your journey. that positive attitude and those grassfed morals sure aren't something you see every day! it's no surprise that you're a natural, but you have a lot left to learn about responsibility, and...it's probably not gonna come easy (sorry)

Q3: THE KINDRED SPIRIT;

your soul is like a mirror for others to find their own beauty. you see the best in people and you strive to bring it out in them. you draw all sorts of people to yourself and you make them feel seen. but who sees you? you try so hard to take care of everyone else, watering everyone else's garden until there's nothing left for your own flowers. when will you fight for your own heart as strongly as you try to nurture others?

Q4: HISTORICAL TRAGEDY;

you know how people say that when someone dies, it’s like their candle goes out? of course you know, you’ve been lost in the dark before. you’ve felt the wax drip onto your skin as the wick burns out, the smoke rising away from the puddle in your hands. maybe you can reshape it—put it back together. maybe you can light it again someday.

Q5: BECAUSE YOU REMIND THEM OF SOMEONE THEY LOST;

you're a chameleon. you have this uncanny ability to mold yourself to fit any hole in someone's heart. you're the ghost of the person they miss, and they love you for coming back to them. maybe you're afraid to show yourself, or maybe you don't even really know yourself in the first place.

Q6: OEDIPUS COMPLEX;

oh my stars stop talking about milfs stop talking about milfs stop stop stop stop NO DONT CALL HIM A DILF OH MY STARS

Q7: TO BE AS BEAUTIFUL AS YOU ONCE WERE;

you revisit the memories of your former self in a haze of nostalgia. all those wild nights seem prettier from the rear view mirror. it's an ideal you'll always be trying to replicate, but growth is a journey. and you can't repeat the past.

Q8: THE BREAD;

whether it’s your ability to rise against the odds, provide comfort, or be a staple in lives, your undercurrent is bread. you’re made from love and you carry it your whole life, to give on to others in any way you can. you’re delicate and it doesn’t take a lot to break you, but still you rise up and that is more important than what took you down. be careful with your heart, it’s so full of love that it needs to be treated delicately. you’re a staple in lives, a necessity, but not always as appreciated as you should be. so here is a thanks to you. m.f.k fisher said “ the smell of good bread baking, like the sound of lightly flowing water, is indescribable in its evocation of innocence and delight” and that my friend, that is you.

Q1: NEPTUNE;

mercy. kindness. sweet. forgiving and compassionate. you are second chances and sometimes third. you are "its ok because everyone makes mistakes." you are "i forgive you as long as you are learning." you are not held down by the demands of your ego. you believe and right and fair. open mindedness and friendship. you are mystical and magical, observant and the smell of warm bread in the morning.

Q2: MORALLY GREY, BUT SEXY ABOUT IT;

you are a bundle of mistakes and personal, gut-wrenching trauma, masked behind irresistible charm and mystery. maybe you've been alive a while, or maybe you've lived so many lives in your short span it's felt like centuries. regardless, you know enough about the world to know it's rarely ever black and white. you'll help when called, but you also don't go out of your way to solve anyone's shit...not until you fuck up and start to care for someone. after that, playing it coy and selfish can only get you so far.

Q3: THE QUIET OBSERVER;

your soul is like a sponge, absorbing so much of the universe sometimes you feel like you're drowning. you wish you could make your heart a little stronger. but your gentleness is not weakness and neither is your sensitivity. you feel so much more than everyone else. it makes you kind even to those who don't deserve it. it makes you notice the hidden tears and the covered scars. you wonder who will save the ones who are suffering in silence, don't you know that includes you too?

Q4: SCI-FI HORROR;

there is always something behind you, but you will never see it…have you seen it? you don't think you can remember now. maybe take another look, just a little glance. what’s one more time, right? just once more, once more, once more…

Q5: BECAUSE YOU NURTURE THEM;

you take care of people's souls. people are drawn to you because you make them feel fulfilled. your love is tender, constant, and whole. however, you often forget to nurture yourself in the same way, finding yourself burnt out and empty. save some gentleness for yourself. you deserve it.

Q6: SAVIOUR COMPLEX;

... oh man. Go take a nap, buddy. they're not your responsibility

Q7: TO BE A DAYDREAM;

you wonder if anyone has ever seen you on the street and heard violins swell. you want to be the kind of beautiful that makes them envision a grand romance in the silver screen of their heart. even if it's just for a minute.

Q8: THE ORANGE;

whether it’s your sweet nature, breakaway cover, or your natural displays of intimacy, you have the undercurrent of the orange. a love language in itself, your nature makes others want to take a bite and enjoy the tang that you leave behind with your laughter. you remind others of a summer day, hot air, long nights, always hopeful you’ll never go away. in her poem “the orange” by wendy cope she said “i peeled it and shared it with robert and dave, they had quarters and i had a half” you’re generous and have much to give. she also said “this is peace and contentment, it’s new” well i say, it’s you.

[vilandel]

1, 2, 13, and 17 for Daminato's daughter (I forgot her name😭 but I really love her based in the description you gave)

Her name is Esperanza and I'm really happy that you ask about her, dear Anon <3

Who makes up your family? How close are you to them? I'm really close to my father! I know he seems distant to many others, probably to you as well. But he is a great father to me and I'm happy to be his daughter! Can't sadly say the same for my mother. It's like I only see her a few times a month, at best. People say that I look a lot like her physically, but every time I look in the mirror, I don't see the cold and the distance, so I'm not so sure about it. My aunt Rosette Silva was the mother figure I had growing up. I'm close to her and I actually see her more often than my own mother! It seems crazy, I know. I'm also close to my cousins Eis and Nanthilde. They're younger than me, but it never really mattered for us. Uncle Solid is a bit off, but he is kind to me. When it comes to my more distant relatives, I always feel welcomed within the Vermillions and the Silvas. As for king Augustus... I still wonder how he is king and not someone capable like my father. But father also decided to not take over the throne. I'm actually the next heir to the crown. And it seems that it won't be long, given that Augustus makes so much nuisance lately that there is a law in the making to dethrone an incompetent ruler when it needs to be done. Which would mean that I'll be queen probably the day I'll get my grimoire. I'm a bit nervous, and I'm not sure that I'll be a good queen for Clover. But I learned a lot for that and Father promised me that I won't be alone, that a lot of people would support me. Wish me luck.

Who is your best friend? Tell us about them! My best friend is Yogan Vermillion, the son of Mereoleona Vermillion and Mushogatake Yosuga, one of the Ryuzen of Hino. Given his parents, he has immense mana and magic, plus his lava magic is scary and fascinating altogether. Thankfully, he is not as wild as his parents, on the contrary, he is very calm. Given his feet into two countries and his will to study, he knows so much and actually helps me to understand leadership and politics. We love to read together or to talk, but also to train. I'm grateful that he isn't as fiery as his mother, otherwise I don't think my glass magic can handle his lava magic, despite both of us being royal. Plus, he is very good-looking and so sweet, a true gentleman... Shoot, have I said this out loud?

You’re given an unlimited budget to build anything you want! What do you build and where do you build it? I would love to build many things that could help the kingdom. Orphanages and schools, libraries even in the Forsaken Realm because everyone deserves knowledge, more infirmaries even for the most far away villages... There are so many things I would love to do to help my country. Maybe I will be able to do it once I'm queen? As for only me, just a small cottage with a garden, maybe in the Common Realm or in the Forsaken Realm, just to relax and rest when royal life becomes too much. It happens more often than you think.

What makes you laugh? King Augustus. Do I need to explain?

[the-fiction-witch]

Fairy

Media Pinnochio 2009

Character lampwick

Couple Lampwick x Reader

Rating Smutty / flirty

Concept Ingreeditants for a love potion

I sat on the fountain, my heart straining my very soul as I watched her, Millie Maryland. She was beautiful, the most perfect girl I'd ever seen but I'd never gotten enough courage to speak to her and even if I did, her father owns half the town and I sleep under a boat she'd never even look at me. 

I'd do anything to get her attention and hopefully to make her fall desperately in love with me but I can't afford grand gestures or impressive flowers. What am I gonna do! She went off with her father so I headed to the library the one place in town with a roof and heat that wouldn't kick me out simply because I had no money I grabbed my favourite book to pass the time and sat beside the large fireplace reading the detailed analysis of monsters and magical creatures reaching sections in the book I didn't usually reach.

sandigal fairies are typically small and solitary creatures living alone in the caves beside sandy beaches they are known to come out at night and dance like fireflies with waves kissing the sand. They are very hard to find but very powerful as there dust has been known to heal many emotional aliments and it is said that some brave and True hearted souls can receive potions from these fairies that when mixed with other items can create powerful tonics and potions most notably mixing sandigal fairy potion with tulip blossoms can brew attraction tonic and love potion.

Love potion! That's what I need, and I live on the beach! I need to find a fairy!

I went searching in every cave along the beach so much so I'm not sure how far is travelled but I couldn't even see town anymore I sat in the sand about ready to give up on this stupid endeavour all together, when I saw a sweet sight what looked like a large firefly dancing along the edge of the oceans waves heading off towards a cave I quickly got up and followed it until I reached the mouth of the cave and I heard the sweet singing within so I quickly went inside and saw a very very beautiful fairy now as tall as me in a little blue dress with sweet purple wings she jumped as she saw me 

"Huu! Who are you!"

"It's okay I mean you no harm little fairy," I told her "I uhhh I heard that you could give me a potion to help in love"

"Oh, I see." She says "your looking for potion ingredients"

"Yes exactly, the book said only brave true hearted souls can receive it. Is there any chance I could?"

"Well, it's less about being brave more about just physically being able to get it" she shrugs 

"I uhh I don't follow" 

"Did your little book tell you how we make the potion?"

"No"

"We make it, inside us"

"I- I have to hurt you?"

"No, no. We make it inside us and then realise it when we get happy enough"

"Happy enough?"

"And the person has to make us that happy hence why many find it so difficult" 

"I have to make you happy?"

"Yes"

"That's difficult?"

"It can be, pace, style, general incompetence. Most boys are usually not great at it"

".... Wait, are you telling me, the potion is basically fairy squirt?" 

"Pretty much" she shrugs 

"Ohh … I guess that makes sense for love potions? Your okay with me?'

"Absolutely" 

"Uuhhhhhh I don't know how I feel about this"

"How badly do you want your potion?"

"Pretty damn bad. Alright let's do it, I uhh I should probably know your name first right" 

"Y/n" she smiled "and you are?'

"Lampwick, so uhhh how do you want to do this?"

[littleragondin]

Here we go again dears

Absolute Zero Time

So last week gave us ample time to see teen!Ongsa develop his very big crush on Soon, and adult!Soon letting himself enjoy some of that maybe a little too much. It ended with the potential promise of things picking up with Ongsa finding and playing with his 2023 phone.

- Okay so the phone will not trigger The Conversation yet. Alright I guess.

- Sine and Teng work so well together, and that little glimpse of a more... playful? Soon when she asks for that ridiculous porridge and he rolls his eyes was delightful. It felt SO natural.

- HA that's the breakfast restaurant from the start of Ep. 02!

- That discussion with the video shop old man feels jarringly out of nowhere - how did we go from that awkward exchange last episode to this is a little ?? to me.

- "If you meet, you'll be parted. If you don't meet, you won't be parted." Alright, is that what Soon's going to riff off to make his decision then? Better never to have met than to have to be parted from you ?

- Oof yeah so that hug out of context is adorable but Soon, my man... You can't give that kind of hope to the boy while building the expectation that you're going to leave him behind all the time.

- I did like that little "missed connection" moment between the teens.

- "for all the people that love you." "including you?" teen!Ongsa is SO clear and forward and secure in what he feels and what he wants, it makes the contrast with adult!Soon even worse for the later...

- The way he interacts with his younger self is so strange. I get that he wants to do something for the lonely kid he used to be but man, you're planning to take away so much from him, too...

- I do like Na and Ongsa's friendship, it's sweet and she really has his back.

- HA finally we are getting the conversation. I am actually really liking the way Ongsa reacts, it feels ... normal. "How much can I trust you?" is a very valid question. The way he asks "I should be happy, right?" yet does not sound happy at all? I liked it. That's a lot, and it's very fair to not feel super positively about it all ngl.

Ok so the pacing of that episode was shakier for me than the previous one, especially the first half. Things happened either very fast or felt artificially delayed so I enjoyed it a little less than the previous ones on that front.

Adult!Soon is being SO frustrating - I sort of defended him last week but right now he feels... too undecided, too incompetent, also - like sir. You're a full adult, you need to take some kind of charge at least about yourself, you can't defer all your decisions to someone else ESPECIALLY A TEEN alright?? I do wonder how much of it is intentional, because - and I am very aware it may be a reach - in the short view we get of their adult relationship in episode 1, Soon does defer all decision to Ongsa, big (taking in the whole DVD collection) or small (what movie are we watching tonight) and in that case, if that's a personal flaw he needs to work on. But we need to know if that's the case now, give me a flashback or anything that point it out more clearly.

I feel so bad for teen!Ongsa, he spent the whole episode being pulled and pushed by Soon, having to deal with so many mixed signals (I was sighing with him when he settles in his bed), and then he gets burdened with that knowledge? That's SO heavy. And conclude on the man you love telling you "yeh so btw all I told you about the fact that we are together and such? Yeah, I will actively try to stop it from happening." like OK?? I don't want to hold hope for anything right now because I'm unsure about the way the story is going, but if that were to happen... I would like a recalcitrant teen!Ongsa actively working against adult!Soon here - trying to save that hypothetical relationship in a way.

I am hanging in there because I am still having a good enough time watching the show, and I am already so very attached to the characters, but I hope now that the truth is out things are going to pick up a bit, not so much in actual pace but with a stronger direction for the plot and especially for Suansoon...

[figkeele]

I get it okay, being sad about a fucking game sucking or your favorite franchise character assassinating is stupid, but it doesn't feel like that now.

You don't know how much extra work I picked up to be able to pre-order the game, because with mom being stage IV it's not good around here...

And okay, maybe because of that, maybe because of my financial, and emotional struggles, maybe because my whole life is being torn apart - by my own brain disease, my mom's cancer, my coworker's suicide. Maybe I'm more sensitive. But this fucking game and the fandom meant a lot to me, it was my last refuge from all the shit in my life.

And sue me, Spider-Man means a lot to me, especially the 1048 universe, but not anymore. And it feels like my last fucking piece of happiness got robbed.

And now, Insomniac, the fucking praised studio, for their awesome storytelling comes up with this heap of garbage. And I know, they can say oh, you haven't played it, I don't need to. Not to see the fucking glaring plot holes or the repetitive shit they're doing? -Really? Agent Venom saves Peter when he almost dies to Kraven in the first act. REALLY? Then Peter again almost dies, this time to Venom, when again they need to resurrect him.

Two times he literally dies and gets resurrected and that's somehow good storytelling? Miles is Spider-Man for less time than him, but it seems Peter can't keep himself alive. And that's your main hero? One near-death would be more than enough, now he just seems incompetent.

And yeah, I get it, the symbiote has to be evil. Mindless. And unsympathetic. I get it, it's okay. The most basic adaptation, but so fresh, right? Yeah, so unique.

But really, the main thing where Insomniac promised a story about personal conflicts is just about an alien wanting to eat the planet? How is that personal? How is that personal that he manipulates Harry via his mom's voice. And then Peter just lets Harry die, because of power? Because he needs the power to save Harry, but he won't save him? Because he doesn't care if he dies? How is that good storytelling? How is that not character-assassinating Peter fucking Parker? But okay, that's what comics are doing, guess Insomniac needed to catch up. And of course, after Harry knows that the symbiote is BAD, he takes it back because he's angry at Peter for being influenced by the symbiote. WHAT DRUGS DID YOU TAKE that this makes any kind of narrative sense to you?

And no, I get it, I wouldn't mind Cindy getting introduced at all. But that it's a fucking big, wild, random coincidence that she ends up being the step-sister of Miles, and everyone is talking about the fucking pheromones? Thanks. Really, you wrote this to the incels.

And let's not talk about Peter retiring but still being around after the end game because you can't just disable Pete, right? Even if narratively that would make sense? How is that not narratively dissonant?

After this I'm gonna write all the incest porn, so at least Hailey can go suck it. Thanks, Insomniac, I really loved what I spent my money on.

Also yeah, your Italian reviewer LEAKED THE WHOLE GAME. But you can't do anything, because it's not an illegal copy.

[space-blue]

I love reading your opinions! What about 13, 17? (for any fandom) and 19 for Avatar?

Oh, well, you're making me blush there... (and also sigh with relief, as work was very quiet, and having a long ask to craft was a great distraction, so thank you!)

13 — worst blorboficiation

Mmh, this is a tough one, because I think there's no bad blorbofication. Like I touched on when talking about homogenization, people taking blorbo on crazy trips isn't an issue to me. Maybe a better term here would be woobifying

The best example I can think of within my fandoms is perhaps Thrawn? I'm going through a renaissance with him I guess... I'm watching rebels at long last and I can't wait for him to show up and make the Empire half-competent.

He's a very compelling character, but the new canon gives him an anti-hero slant, which I think is a little unfortunate, as fandom multiplies that into a bit of 'Thrawn did nothing wrong' and 'he's just a cute smartass doing his best'.

But Thrawn shines as a villain. Which he is. He aligns with the Empire for his interests. For the plans he designed. He does orbital bombings and closes his eyes on slavery and is mostly annoyed at the Death Star for being a stupid waste of resources and taking away from his own, better optimised death squadrons! He's. Not. A. Good. Guy. In legends he has a guy killed on his bridge for being incompetent.

And yeah it's the same bridge where this happens:

Now I know my own original First Fic™️ is Thrawn on holidays, and that I put it on hiatus before I got to the War Crimes™️, so it definitely looks like I'm part of that problem. It's just a general trend. Thrawn being cute with Eli. Thrawn being a harmless hottie. Thrawn being relatable. Thrawn saving his people with some hard logic and art appreciation.

Not enough Thrawn being the bad guy he canonically is. There is that out there though and it's great!! So it's not an actual complaint either.

17 — there should be more of this type of fic/art

For fic, actually gender-neutral readers, not fem readers hidden under a "GN Reader" tag. Your reader is not properly gender-neutral if they have curves, lush hair, full lips, etc. sometimes people try and it just slips past them. Sometimes you really feel like they just slapped the tag on without another thought.

It's hard when it comes down to smut, but it's not complicated to be fully neutral when you're dealing with gen fic. Which ties into another thing I'd love more of : second person GN reader fics that aren't smutty/horny but rather gen. I write them because I rarely find them, and I think they're fun. There's definitely an audience for it!

I don't have anything for art. I'm always happy to see people's work and don't have anything in particular I'm searching for when browsing a fandom. Just curious to see what's up, and happy with whatever I get.

19 — you're mad/ashamed/horrified you actually kind of like...

Nice try. I'm not. I like what I like and I don't waste my time with any sort of misplaced shame.

It's not a diss at you! And I understand what prompts this question too. 'Oh no, I never meant to ship it, it's kind of icky, but...' is a common enough sentiment.

Not with me though. If I ship I ship, if I like I like. It's fiction. There's no room for shame or horror.

Thank you for your ask, it was a fun part of a long and empty shift x'D