#the end will destroy me ONCE AGAIN but I'm gonna embrace it

[klara-rosa]

I started re-reading The Song of Achilles today (after many many years!) and I love it just as much now as I did when I first read it like 10 years ago??? More than that maybe???

It is just the most magical, beautiful, meaningful book of prose you can ever read. Every word is written with such care and intention. It is not overly fluffy yet somehow the most romantic text you will ever read. I have always felt that you learn something when you read this book. It stays with you. It has always felt like it leaves an imprint on my heart (which sounds so stupid!) but what I mean is that sometimes a song or a poem or just a simple sentence touches something so purely human inside of you, like the very essence of your own self. And this book has ALWAYS done that to me. I read it and my very being is touched. These sentences are imprinted on my essence.

I read this so long ago and have read so many books since and I have enjoyed many books immensly since, but nothing ever comes close to The Song of Achilles. Nothing. ❤️

[jeonminhao]

Home • Minghao

Pairing : Xu Minghao x Fem! Reader

Genre : angst, fluff

Word Count : 1.1K

TW : mention of depression(?)

A.N. I'm trying to go back to writing again, this time with Seventeen :) since I am back into the Kpop world lmao. Pls lmk what you think! <3

"I cry, even without tears now. I cry again, just like breathing. Though I try to take a step away from the sorrow that has become my home, I cry on the doorsill. I cry, even without knowing it myself."

Tablo - 집 (Home) (Feat. Lee Sora)

Minghao stood in front of the glass door, his eyes fixed on the CLOSED sign. The flower bouquet he had been holding was wet from the rain, the petals falling pitifully on the gray pavement from how tight he was clutching the bouquet. He was late. Again. And he wasn’t sure if he’ll be forgiven. He quickly took out his phone once he found a canopy that could shield him from the rain, reading the string of texts you had sent him hours prior.

I am here! It’s pretty crowded. I found a place at the very back of the restaurant so we can talk. Saw Jeonghan and Wonwoo at the restaurant and he said you’re still at the studio? Hao, Where are you?  Is everything ok? It’s been 2 hours so i guess this means you’re not coming or forgot we’re supposed to meet up :) I’m gonna head back home. I think it’s going to rain soon. Don’t forget your umbrella. Text me soon.

He sighed. He didn’t mean to ignore your texts. His phone was set on his usual silent mode whenever he was working on his paintings. He swore he had remembered that you were supposed to meet at 8 PM in this new place Mingyu recommended the other day. He didn’t know when you two started to make this a thing, trying new places once a week and just hangout and talk about your lives. No. He did know. It was your idea and your twinkling eyes that always looked at him as if he was loved and deserving of one. And who could say no to that? To your gentle smile and warm hand that always finds its way wrapped in his. And he did enjoy it. How couldn’t he? He fell in love with you the first time Jeonghan introduced you to the group three years ago and had been ever since. But life seemed to have a way to fuck up everything he desired. 

He knew a bad day was inevitable and the darkness that wrapped around him like a blanket was not an unfamiliar feeling. Every day seemed like a chore. It was just exhausting. Even breathing exhausts him. But he thought it would be different this time. He thought having you by his side would lessen the pain. And maybe it did, to an extent. But he was drowning and he was just exhausted to even want to try. 

As if it wasn’t enough, his art project wasn’t progressing as well as he’d like and he kept scraping layers of paints and changing his canvases when they finally gave up on him. He had destroyed a half finished painting due to frustration and would’ve destroyed the rest of his paintings if you didn’t knock on his studio door.

And in the midst of his worries and struggle, he started to push everyone away. It was better to be alone. The coldness in his heart was more familiar than the warmth of your embrace and he was terrified. It was too foreign for him, the happiness, the warmth, and the feeling of belonging, of being home. 

“Hao?” Minghao startled, eyes quickly focused on the familiar figure standing under a black umbrella. 

“Y/N? What are you doing here?” was all he could say, mouth forming an ‘o’ shape. You were supposed to be mad at him for forgetting your ‘adventures’ for the nth times. You were supposed to throw tantrums and threaten to block him and end this friendship. But there you were, standing in front of him with the black satin dress he bought for you last month and the leather jacket that he realized was also a gift from him. You took tentative steps towards him, a smile blooming in your face once you finally stepped under the canopy.

“You texted me?”

Minghao looked down at his cold hand, the phone on his hand was still on with your chat window opened.

‘Sorry. I’m so sorry. I’m late again. Iloveyou. I’m s osoorry.’

He didn’t even remember when he typed those texts nor did he remember pressing the send button despite the typos.

He reread his text again and froze. “Y/N–,” 

“Did you mean that?” You asked, taking another step closer and Minghao could smell the familiar perfume on you and the scent of your favorite shampoo. “Did you mean it when you said you love me?” You asked again, this time in a whisper. 

It had been 3 years, 970 days to be exact (not that Minghao is counting) since he first fell in love with you. And not once, even in his drunken state, did he let himself text you and confess. Especially not in such a dumb way. He prided himself as someone who was always in control of his emotions, keeping everything hidden to make sure you wouldn’t be uncomfortable. But there he was, sober and doing the stupidest thing a Minghao could do. Not even drunk Soonyoung would do this, he fleetingly thought before he turned his attention back to you. 

“I brought you flowers. They’re ruined. Sorry. I know i shouldn’t be late and forgot but everything has been shit and–”

“I love you, Minghao.” Your words stopped his trainwreck of a thought. His eyes widened as he looked at you. “I thought you hated going with me and doing this… But Jeonghan said you kept telling him about our time and he said you really love it. And I noticed you’ve been kinda withdrawn ever since I saw you at the studio. You do know you are not alone right, Minghao?” You took his hand in you. It was cold but it was okay. Minghao was Minghao and he was anything but cold to you. “ It’s okay to have a difficult time, but don’t forget you have a lot of people who would do anything for you.”

“This seems more like an intervention than a confession.” He blurted out before both of you burst into giggles, the cold rain suddenly didn’t feel so cold anymore now that he had wrapped his arms around you, the bouquet long forgotten on the wet pavement. 

“It’s both.” Was all you said before pressing your lips against him. A gentle and wary kiss, as if you were terrified he’d hate it. He let go of one hand and cupped your cheek, pulling you into a deeper kiss, sighing in relief, his body relaxing under your touch and heated kiss. Murmurs of apologies and I love you’s keep spilling out of his lips as your hand clutch the front of his sweater as if he was your lifeline. 

Maybe the unfamiliar was okay. Maybe he could get used to this.

[imminent-danger-came]

So- we all agree that MK will at some point fight his friends.

But what do you think would cause an actual fight to break out? I can imagine a CONFRONTATION. Arguing, a small scale brawl or scuffle. A full blown, all out, cataclysmic battle however? HOW???

Yeah, MK did lash out at Macaque when he was pretending to be Wukong. MK was definitely upset, but the thing that made him want to straight up fight Wukong was Macaque antagonizing him and hitting him where it hurts.

Mei and the real Wukong wouldn’t do that. They love MK too much. And vice versa. I just can‘t imagine them fighting eachother while fully aware.

Do you think it would be a loss of control situation? That MK‘s too powerful to contain? Brainwashing 2.0? Golden Circlet? Someone pretending to be MK and leaving the real one to deal with thr consequences? I‘m just listing all the different tropes at this point oof

Or do you have a specific scenario in mind that you think could realistically happen or hope for?

So! I think it'll be a combination of a loss of control, good ol' fashioned manipulation, and MK learning something that pushes him over the edge.

Like, you know in 4x13 where MK says things that distinctly don't feel like MK—"We'll alright then", "Oh there's nothing mindless about me friend"—and he's smiling and very much unhinged, and it's all kinda scary? I feel like there's gonna be a lot more of that next season, all aligning with MK and his fate vs what he actually wants. Like:

Subodhi: “Who or what you are, even I do not know the answer—but of one thing, I am certain: fate has plans for you! Great plans, or foul? Time will tell.” MK: "I- I can't be! I'm just MK!" Subodhi: "The Monkie Kid?" MK: *Gasps*

(4x06 Show Me the Monster)

-

"Great plans, or foul?" - "Remind me how this 'game' is supposed to convince me I'm not destined to turn into an evil monkey demon thing again? Cause every option I pick takes me to this same screen!" - Aka, despite your choices the final outcome is inevitable. MK wants to be MK, but he's also the Monkie Kid, and he can't separate himself from whatever he is—i.e. MK is gonna have to reconcile the different parts of himself, including the parts of himself he refuses to acknowledge.

The conclusion Macaque helps MK come to at the end of s4 is that no one can decide who MK is for him ("Only you get to decide who you are kiddo."), and what I LOVE to point out is that the person who decided who MK is, who he will be, was in fact himself—or at least the curse version of himself:

(*sigh* this wasn't supposed to be super long and then it was. The rest under the cut!)

Curse MK: “Haha, seriously? You still think we’re just some, noodle delivery guy? You can’t remember where we came from, and we got ALL this power, and you never once thought, WHY US? What are we? What is our purpose?”

-

Curse MK: “You can’t escape it, this thing, whatever you are, embrace it. Embrace your destiny.”

-

Curse MK: "You can see it, can't you? This is your fate. Your friends will turn on you, seeing you for the monster you will become. They will destroy you, harbinger of chaos."

(4x07 Pitiful Creatures)

-

It's this interesting mess, where it seems like MK is spiraling towards becoming something else, something he doesn't want to become. So let's add a little check mark next to the "loss of control" box for why MK is fighting his friends next season—I'm not sure he'll be entirely "himself" if you catch my drift (maybe a kinda Samadhi Fire Mei situation, similar to the way she loses control).

Next point: good ol' fashioned manipulation.

So, just like LBD we got another puppet master on our hands, the person who was pulling the strings and released Azure.

AKA whoever the fuck this guy is:

Hooded Figure: "There will of course be an inquiry into how the scroll of memory was stolen in the first place, and what is to be done now that the Jade Emperor has been dethroned. The universe is perilously close to tipping into chaos. If it comes to light that any of this party were involved, you can believe the consequences will be dire—but only a fraction of the price compared to what shall come to pass should you succeed."

(4x14 Better Than We Found It)

-

The thing about this guy who wanted Azure to become the Jade Emperor and lose control—perhaps they wanted the Jade Emperor's power without a host so they could use it for their own purposes?—is that we don't know what their plan is, but we can assume it's going to include MK ("Great plans or foul?", MK as a "harbinger of chaos" with this mystery person trying to tip the universe into chaos, etc.—I'd argue they're the next stand in for destiny)

Which gets me to my point: our hooded figure is going to manipulate MK the same way they manipulated Azure, and the same way LBD manipulated MK before, which means gettin' all up inside MK's head. Making him doubt both himself and Monkey King and his friends.

And well, people trying to turn MK against Wukong has had a track record of MK absolutely losing his shit and going into Monkey form before (which admittedly may be the very thing the hooded figure wants):

1.) The very first time MK glitches into Monkey Form is after the curse insists that "We're just like Wukong—a fraud! A trickster! Destructive! Why would our legacy be any different? Actually, no no- the chaos and destruction we'll bring upon the world will make Wukong's past look like nothing."

2.) Then, first time MK fully enters monkey form is after the curse insists that "It's just like the Lady Bone Demon said—all you'll ever do is cause pain and suffering!", which in itself is tied to the words Mei says to Wukong in 3x10 "Don't you see you're hurting the people who care about you the most?" which is ALSO tied to 4x08 with the reason MK decides to run off to begin with—he's afraid of hurting the people he cares about (just like Wukong) and that perhaps he really is only destined to cause pain and suffering.

3.) After 4x07 MK goes into his Monkey Form again in 4x08, but this time it's after Azure tried to destroy MK's faith in Wukong ("Monkey King's a hero he wouldn't just-" "You saw it with your own eyes! His betrayal his brutality, he took the only friends I had from me."). MK really starts to lose it after he learns Azure won't release Wukong from the scroll ("I won't let you take Monkey King away from me again!").

4.) Next, in 4x09, MK starts glitching into Monkey Form after Macaque insults Wukong ("Or, he was just doing his usual Wukong thing and being a lazy peach eating idiot—ignoring all the worlds problems."). It's also directly after MK wonders why Wukong stayed on flower fruit mountain all those years: "You think Monkey King ever felt like this? Maybe that's why he stayed up on this mountain, just having a good time with you guys. You know cause- cause he knew he'd be out of the way where he couldn't hurt anyone he cared about."

5.) Next instance of Monkey Form isn't until 4x13, but I'd argue it's the most relevant of the bunch. For the entire special MK hadn't flickered into Monkey Form once, but he does after Azure starts insulting his loyalty to Wukong: ""After all Sun Wukong has put you through, how much he has let you down, you would STILL meet your fate trying to protect him? He doesn't deserve such loyalty, yet you insist on learning the hard way, just as I did. I should have never trusted the Monkey King! The false sage, equal to NOTHING!"

And then after this we have the scariest instances of Monkey MK I ever did see:

MK is ripe to be manipulated in all the wrong ways, specifically around his relationship with Monkey King—and perhaps even his friends if the situation gets bad enough (though I would imagine it being something more like MK trying to leave to protect them [again] and the gang not letting him) (Other side note: there are literally 5 examples of MK going into Monkey Form because of how his relationship/view of Wukong is being called into question, all at the end of s4. That is so many).

I think a la 2x05 and 4x07 MK will also have his perception of himself pushed to it's limits via our new antagonist. So rather than Wukong or Mei antagonizing MK for him to lash out, I'd say our puppet master will be the one to antagonize MK. To push him towards whatever they need MK to be for their plans.

And with that, I'm checking off box number 2 "good ol' fashioned manipulation".

Now onto point number 3, MK learning info that pushes him over the edge (which will be helped by point number 2 and lead to point number 1, FULL CIRCLE BABY).

So the special definitely set up the fact that there's more both MK and the audience don't know about Wukong's past, particularly around Macaque:

Macaque: "Every choice has consequences kid, for someone." MK: "Okay come on man! What happened between you two, for realzies!"

MK: "Seriously! Come on man I need answers!"

(4x11 A Lifetime of Mistakes)

-

Oh sweet MK, answers you will receive! They just won't be the answers you want. (The fact that MK is questioning Wukong's past at all, along with the curse saying "We're just like Wukong" as proof they were destructive, leads me to believe that uh, maybe your boy is having some doubts! One of the things MK is specifically upset at Azure about is that the Lion attempted to "turn him against his own mentor". That's all gonna lead somewhere)

Which, the implication is clear:

For undoubtedly some important reason, Wukong had to either kill Macaque or bring him to deaths door. But, MK over there who refused to abandon or hurt Mei even when she was going to burn away reality, who refused to abandon his friends even if it might risk unleashing the curse into the world, might not understand the nuances (hi "good guy" V "bad guy" binary mentality) of whatever happened between Wukong and Macaque.

Lego Monkie Kid is a show where plot points and arcs line up—the fact that MK's faith in Wukong is being questioned, the origin of SWK and Macaque's falling-out is just around the corner, and MK losing control is a very likely possibility, it all means I would be surprised if it everything wasn't going to be acknowledged at around the same time. All these things will build off of one another, and MK is going to spiral HARD (and SWK probably will too. Sorry boys)

The Macaque and SWK backstory alone would be enough I think, or WHATEVER other Wukong past plot points they want to introduce, but we also have the matter of MK's origins—his purpose. Why he was created and why he exists (again that who MK wants to be VS what fate has in store for him, and acknowledging the different parts of himself). MK, without any real knowledge of what he is, already believed that he was destined to bring chaos. Say, MK were to learn that he was either created for such a purpose or was something that caused chaos before (hello EAMK), this would absolutely RUIN MK's perception of himself.

So then combining all of these different problems and the culmination of MK's series long crippling self-doubt/identity arc, we're like, fucked? Honestly I can't imagine MK not having a full blown, all out, cataclysmic battle and breakdown.

There have also been certain things building up from s2 that MK never really talked about with Wukong. MK was willing to punch Wukong in 2x07 (the og "hey MK your mentor kinda sucks" episode). He was clearly hurt by Wukong's decision to leave in s2, Wukong proceeded to lie all through s3, and after Monkey King apologizes to MK in 3x14, he sort of brushes it off:

Sun Wukong: "I know I can never make it up to you. Honestly, I- I never thought I'd live as long as I have let alone be someone's mentor—turns out I'm not very good at it. I guess what I'm trying to say is...I'm sorry MK. For all of it." MK: "It's okay—I can always get another bowl of noodles."

Sun Wukong: "Wha! No! Not the noodles! Ugh! I mean, I'm sorry for being a bad mentor and making you clean up after my mess!" MK: "I know—sometimes I just play dumb to lighten the mood."

(3x14 Destiny Fulfilled) (Crying look at that face full of love. Oh my god. Fuck. Fuck me. How dare I write a meta on why these two are going to fight)

-

To me, this scene reeks of MK going "oh thank god things can go back to normal", and then trying to sweep everything under the rug without actually acknowledging or processing anything. He does something similar in 4x11, wanting to brush past Wukong's mistakes and rush to SWK's "path of the good guy" and "good life choices" so that he can move on.

When it comes down to it, MK doesn't want to have any issues with Wukong, but unfortunately there are very much issues. Wukong has tried his best to make amends and be better for MK, but MK isn't letting himself heal. He's running from himself, and he wants to pretend things are much simpler than they are.

And, once MK is forced to come face to face with how complex and messy both himself and Wukong are? I am expecting that kid to break and an all out fight to emerge. SWK V MK, Mentor V Student, Monkey King V Monkey Kid.

But, because Wukong is Wukong, he's not going to be able to go all out against his student (he couldn't even go all out against Macaque or Ne Zha), which, with how powerful MK is, that's not going to go well. That's where the gang steps in—they're going to have to try and put a stop to MK, and get him to see reason, to come back to himself. "Mend the fracture between [him]self and Wukong" if you will. Perhaps even Samadhi Fire Part 3 if we're lucky.

Or at least that's how I imagine it could go down!

[thewhumpcaretaker]

Saluti, sono io! :)

Influencing you with Santino x John AHAHAH-

I found an interesting sentence, and I'm curious about your opinion, "Hold my hand. You're going to be fine." Like, whatever you have in mind with that sentence with Santino and John

Bella come sempre!! Wonderful prompt. Guess I’ve been bamboozled into writing angsty drabble, oh noooo…

TW: mention of past physical abuse

“Santino?” John came into their bedroom looking for him, almost done preparing dinner. He found him staring out the window, the setting sun flaring against the edges of his curls. 

Santino didn’t turn to face him. “I will be with you, I’m just…trying to return a phone call.”

“From who?”

He cleared his throat and attempted to sound casual. “My father.” Four months ago, Santino had lied and told his father he was moving to New York on business. In reality, he came to live with John. They had barely spoken since. Santino had asked for space to focus on work, which, for once, his father had accepted. He was no doubt glad that Santino finally seemed interested in making a mark on the world, and relieved that things were so quiet and untroubled on Santino’s turf. But he would call eventually, and now he finally had. 

“You don’t have to talk to him.” John’s voice had gone suddenly flat and hard.

“Yes I do.” He sighed, fidgeting with his tie. “If I ignore him forever, he’ll cut me out of the will. Besides, it’s ridiculous to be upset over this. I’ve talked to him for most of my life. Moving out, talking to him less and less…it made me soft. I should suck it up like I used to.” He made a small, choked sound that should’ve been a laugh. John made him soft, honestly, that was the truth. And he liked it. John made him care about himself, about his own wellbeing. Put him in touch with his emotions. After all that had passed between them over the last few months, to return to being degraded and belittled hurt more than he could explain. To talk politely to the man who had beaten him…after confessing to John how much those beatings had destroyed him…it made something twist inside his gut.

“Hey. No you shouldn’t ‘suck it up’.” John could no longer hold back from embracing him. Santino finally turned towards his lover and curled into him, his face crumpling against John’s shoulder.

“Why did you have to go and make me love being alive, mio caro? I was good and numb before you came along. Now it will hurt so much more to talk to him. I don’t know if I can do it.”

Again, John said, “You don’t have to.”

“No. I have to. And I will.” He pulled back and straightened his vest, composing himself. John hesitated, knowing deep down that this call truly could not be avoided. The best John could do was to comfort him.

“Can I stay next to you?”

“I would like that very much.”

“Good. Hold my hand. You’re gonna be fine.” John held up his palm to Santino, waiting patiently. “No matter what he says to you, I’m here.”

He swallowed, and looked at John with a small glint of confidence growing in his eyes.  He took his hand and squeezed it. “Okay.” Then he dialed.

John didn’t let go or take his eyes off of him for the entire call. Whenever Santino felt misery building in his chest, he just remembered the steady pressure of John’s hand in his, grounding him, and knew that John cared for him. What else really mattered? Whenever Santino had to agree to something, or apologize for something, a look of protective rage passed over John’s dark eyes, making him feel so very loved. The old fool on the other end of the line would never understand the kind of happiness they had. He rubbed his thumb over John’s fingers in a gesture of gratitude. "Ti amo,” he mouthed silently to John, during a particularly vicious speech that he was hardly hearing, and squeezed his hand again. John squeezed back.

[nobodysdaydreams]

THE SI-5 WILL PAY FOR THEIR SINS IF I HAVE TO WRITE THE FIC FOR IT MYSELF! BLESSIE WILL BE AVENGED! (or my reaction to episodes 32-34 and mini episode 5 of Wolf359)

Sorry (again) for the delay, but I did warn you my schedule would be very inconsistent. Thank you everyone for your patience. At least I was able to finish these notes tonight.

Tagging the mutuals who got me invested in this, and if you want to be tagged or untagged from these posts, lmk, or you can follow my blog or simply follow the tag "#bods wolf359 reactions". Anyone who has followed me for a while knows my updates are inconsistent, so I apologize in advance for that and for any spelling/grammar mistakes in my posts.

@sophieswundergarten @oflightningandstars @acollectionofcuriousreblogs @herawell @commsroom

Episode 32: Controlled Demolition

I'm reacting to this while doing chores, so sorry if this is super brief. Hopefully it's not too plot heavy.

Have I mentioned I hate Kepler? Honestly the worst. I don't trust any of them.

Let's see...not a fan of Jacobi either. Of course I don't like Hilbert or his Decima project (which btw, it was very nice of the virus to not attack and kill Doug during his 100+ days alone in space without Hilbert keeping him stable). But Jacobi clearly doesn't know what he's doing, leave the dangerous chemicals alone!

Also the whole idea of Doug keeping someone on task...hilarious. Makes you wonder why Kepler REALLY gave him this assignment. Maybe to keep Doug distracted.

And then Maxwell. Looks like she has an interest in AI that's not entirely hostile, but at the end of the day, she's still working for the bad guys. When push comes to shove, she's gonna have to chose between Hera and Doug and Cutter and his errand boys. But I guess I hate her the least right now out of the three. She at least detected that Hera was in pain and is trying to do something. I hate to applaud someone for doing the bare minimum but that’s where we’re at I guess.

And Hera...you could have told Doug. He would understand. He's your friend.

I feel so bad for Hera. I just know they're gonna install some program in her that forces her to hurt her friends. It's only a matter of time.

Also, of course Kepler wants to play chess. That's the most villain thing ever, threatening someone over a chess board. Just once, I want to see a villain use a less ominous board game just to be funny. Like imagine Kepler with a nice Whisky in his hands mulling over a game of "Chutes and Ladders" or “Candyland”. It would be funny. Well at least Kepler embraces the villain aesthetic.

Though it's interesting: command doesn't know where the two years of Lovelace's life went. Or at least they claim. Now I'm curious. Was it the aliens? Is Lovelace a robot clone after all? Maybe Doug was right yet again!

A liability? Fire when ready? Oh my gosh is Jacobi gonna shoot Lovelace? Or Hilbert?

What was that?

Nice of Dr. Maxwell to make sure Hera wasn't in pain. But um...what did they just destroy on the Hephaestus? Another secret lab?

Oh my gosh. Just from the way Doug says the word "is". I've pause the episode but they better not have. THEY BETTER NOT HAVE.

If they did I'm gonna go insane.

NO.

THOSE BASTARDS.

USED TO BE?

BLESSIE DID NO HARM HE DIDN'T ASK TO BE CREATED! HE DIDN'T ASK TO BE BORN AND HE WASN'T PUTTING ANYTHING IN JEPORDY! HE WAS A GENTLE SOUL. 🥺

JACOBI AND KEPLER HAVE FORFITTED THEIR RIGHTS TO REDEMPTION ARCS. CUTTER'S ERRAND BOYS DESERVE NOTHING. 😠

Mixed feelings about Maxwell. At least she helped Hera but...she did it so they could kill Blessie. I still don't trust her.

"It's just business" WELL GUESS WHAT KEPLER? Maybe my business is about to become writing 500 fics where the plant monster eats you! How do ya like them apples?

You all knew this was coming didn't you? You, person reading this right now. You saw my love of the plant monster and hate for SI-5 and smiled to yourself. You've been waiting haven't you? Well dear readers. Here it is. I hope it was all worth it to you. Because for the rest of my Wolf359 reactions, I'm gonna have nothing but hate and contempt for Cutter's errand boys and their stupid chess games and inability to properly inspect a chemical lab.

Episode 33: Don't Poke the Bear

Yeah Hilbert, Doug is allowed to be mad at you. Just because there are worse devils in the world than you doesn't make you an angel.

Hey that's actually a pretty good quote. Good for me.

"You won't even know I'm here". You know Kepler, if you threw yourself out of the airlock, then you wouldn't be here at all, you plant murdering psychopath. I hope you drown in your own Whisky.

And stop talking. And slurping.

Never thought I'd support Hilbert, but Here. We. Are.

Kepler. What kind of childish power trip is this?

Oh ew. Jacobi. Maybe you can help Kepler out the airlock.

Wait...are they trying to tell them how to do this? ARE JACOBI AND MAXWELL BETRAYING KEPLER? Or is this all part of some grand scheme? Jacobi still shot Blessie, so even if he is helping them, I really don't care, and I don’t believe it.

Oh ew Kepler. You don't get to call Hilbert out. THAT'S MY JOB. You forfeited that right when you shot Blessie.

And stop pretending to care about Doug.

"Mr. Ballistics Dummy" okay Jacobi. "Mr. Errand Boy" it is.

Yeah Kepler seems pretty paranoid.

"I'd kill for five minutes in the achieves without red tape" "She's being metaphorical" ...why do I not believe that...

And Jacobi...you seem unusually calm and laid back about this. Why do I think this is all you trying to trap them?

"Just because we do awful things doesn't mean we have to like it". YOU DON'T HAVE TO DO ANYTHING. You're still morally responsible. Forgive me if a few tears shed over those you killed doesn’t cut it.

"This empty coffee cup outranks you" Kepler I hope one day your Whisky glass outranks you.

No decima research? Oh my goodness what a surprise! Command doesn't care about you Hilbert! Who could have seen this coming? Oh my gosh evil people stab each other in the back, I could have nevvvveeeerrrrr seen that one coming. 🙄

"He can be very...enthusiastic when it comes to guarding his secrets" Oh I bet.

THE WHISKEY SPEECH IS A ROUTINE SPEECH HE GIVES?

Kepler really is discount Cutter.

Ah...grand scheme it seems. I knew I was right to put Jacobi on my hit list. And Maxwell, it seems you're interested in joining the party. Welcome, welcome.

They didn't even deliver their letters? Man they are embracing the villain aesthetic.

"Kepler is manipulating you." Of course he is.

Solid advice Hilbert. "Don't trust me. But don't trust him either."

IT GREW HIS FINGERNAILS BACK?

Oh my. This is big. But then why does Cutter want to shut it down? Is he so against doing good that he won't do a good thing for society even if it will make him famous and considered a good guy for curing a ton of stuff? He really is the worst.

Episode 34: A Matter of Perspective

People need to be nicer to Doug. He has the least blood on his hands. And every time Jacobi and Kepler talk I lose brain cells. "I do evil but it's necessary" yeah, except it's not. It's literally not. What's wrong with you?

I don't care about the stupid superpowered three-legged pig.

Oh my gosh HE IS STILL GOING.

...

He can't even remember the punchline. Pathetic.

More music! 🎶🎶🎶

...They have board games?

Ugh. Pryce and Carter again. "The existential terror that is funzo."

Why is that in the manual? And if it is, why bring it to space? This raises so many questions.

Well at least it's not chess. Though it's no "Chutes and Ladders". Or “Candyland”.

Have I mentioned I hate SI-5 yet? Poor Doug.

Oh my gosh is this more funzo? Is the game even real?

"Hidden inwardness card"? "Time Vortex?" What sort of old-timey board game is this? Loyalty round? Wheel of ages? Sunken Idol? Celestial Steps?

At least Hera seems to like it. Did they bring it for the AIs? To keep them entertained?

WHAT IS THIS GAME. 😂

IS HILBERT THE REF? 😂 Oh my gosh he is being tortured.

Okay Jacobi and Kepler have history. But here's the thing Jacobi. There's a difference between a coach that pushes you to do your best on a football team, and a known murderer who pushes you to become a murderous psychopath.

WHY DO YOU TRUST HIM WITH YOUR LIFE JACOBI? He's crazy. Nutso. Why would you blow up Doug for him?

Oh. A forbidden picture of Doug. Maybe that's private. It does make me wonder about his past though...

"Reality Storm".

...ooohhhh... the "Golden Loyalty Card". How fancy.

I hope Pryce and Carter had fun designing the game. Sound like they really had a good time with it.

"I never wanted to be up here in space" well, then WHY ARE YOU HERE? WHY ARE YOU GIVING IT EVERYTHING?

"Kepler is gone" oh that's such a stupid cop out. "The old me died" nah, you're still here you're just making terrible life choices.

"Jacobi's a smart man" No, not really.

Oh great the pig joke.

Hahaha...that's not funny you psycho. That's not funny at all. It’s also clearly a metaphor for them. A slow death doesn’t make it any less of a murder.

Oh there's more? Is it just me or are the episodes getting longer.

It's his birthday again! And Christmas! Well, this is nice. They remembered this time. 🥰

"The same thing I do every night. I get older". Don't we all Doug. Don't we all.

Mini Episode 5: Long Story Short

What is the Argentinian incident?

Well I guess we'll never know.

Oh flashback land.

Yikes Kepler really seems to like to tell stories. HE HAD A FUNK BAND? HABERDASHERS? WHAT?

Well I guess even cold hearted villains need hobbies. Charges of insider trading? Saw Maxwell's feet? Okay that one was weird. What's out there in the woods? "I don't remember anything from 1987?" ...why are these silly stories getting more ominous.

Is that it? Yikes that really was short. Really short did I miss something? Okay, well I guess that's it.

Kepler should have stayed with his funk band. Maybe then he wouldn't be on my airlock launching list.

Thanks for reading dear readers. See you soon!

[whovianwatchingstartrek]

A Whovian Watches Star Trek for the First Time: Part 069 - Arriving at the Weapon

Star Trek: Enterprise - Season 3 Episode 18 - Azati Prime

We've finally arrived at Azati prime. Everything is quiet and tense. Degra is celebrating the completion of the weapon with the Xindi Council.

The planet is protected by a dense sensor field of satellites, which Enterprise won't be able to pass through. The plan to get through it is to use one of the Insectoid shuttles we previously picked up to get through. That plan however, requires Mayweather and Trip to figure out how to fly the thing. Easier said than done, but they get the hang of it. Meanwhile a monitoring station picks up Enterprise. Enterprise launches a strike on the station to keep their secrecy.

Trip and Travis get the scans of the Weapon's production facility, then head back aboard. Apparently blowing up the weapon would be a suicide mission, so Archer offers himself up. Which is when the future people intervene once again. Daniels picks up Archer and drops him on another Enterprise (I'm assuming it's from one of the Other Star Treks, kind of like that one time the 10th Doctor Console Room showed up in the 11th Doctor era), 400 years in Archer's future.

Daniels urges the Xindi to make peace, because apparently the people who built the spheres will destroy the Galaxy if Humanity is destroyed or Archer is killed. It's fun to see that Archer and T'Pol's positions on Daniels and Time Travel have reversed. It's now Archer who doesn't believe him, and T'Pol who's fully accepting of what Daniel's has to say. And T'pol pulling an emotional argument of "I don't want you to die" is a beautiful but subtle peak in her arc of embracing her emotions.

Archer's goodbyes were touching. Him switching his usual "look after porthos" speech from "don't give him any cheese" to "Slip him a peace of cheese every now and then" hit me harder than I was expecting. I kinda knew he was going to go back on it, killing of the captain mid-season just isn't how TV works, but honestly they sold it hard enough to have me question if they were actually gonna do it.

Archer however is captured before he can blow up the Weapon. We're then treated to Archer sassing the reptilians while being tortured which was fun, his banter and insults were great. Archer convinces the reptilians that he'll only talk to Degra. Meanwhile, T'Pol decides to talk diplomacy with the Xindi. Archer tells everything he knows about the Spheres to Degra, in an attempt to convince him to abandon the weapon project.

While this conversation is ongoing, Enterprise is being shot out of the sky by the Reptilians. Communications are down, and the Reptilians are transfering Archer to another prison. Things are left on a pretty dire cliffhanger.

Unfortunately, like most of the main story-arc for this season, I've found it a bit dull. The Time Travel stuff was interesting, and I liked that it continued down Degra's kind of Oppenheimer "I am become death" arc from Stratagem. He really doesn't want to build this weapon, and I can't wait to delve into that more. The ending struggle aboard the collapsing Enterprise was also some really good action. I am excited to see how this cliffhanger is resolved.

[shattered-divinity]

So easy...it would be so easy to destroy him here and now and be done with it. To never have to hear his vile insults again...to never again worry that Charlie would be under any threat from this particular being. He could just...tighten his grip...dig his claws in...obliterate his soul until it ceased to exist. Just a little more force and he could be done with it, once and for all. The temptation was all too real.....and that was exactly why he stopped himself from following through.

It wouldn't do anything for him in the end. It wouldn't help anything. It certainly wouldn't bring back what he'd lost. It wouldn't take away the bone-numbing terror he'd felt at the prospect of losing Charlie. It might make him feel better for a split second...but in the end all it would do is take away one more from him. Someone he used to know - used to care about, in his own way. It would just end up as more loss, pointless and useless and so fucking stupid.

He wasn't what Adam claimed him to be. He wasn't only good for destruction. Destruction was the last thing he'd ever wanted...and yet had been forced to embrace as the King of Hell. It wasn't a choice he'd made. He didn't want to destroy things. Adam was wrong. He had to be wrong. Lucifer had to prove him wrong. And so his grip loosened by fractions, just enough to allow the Sinner to breathe, even as those razor sharp claws ripped at him, struggling desperately to free himself.

He wasn't destruction incarnate. He wasn't a butcher. He wasn't. He was what he'd been forced to become, nothing more nothing less. He knew the other hated him, but no one hated him more than he hated himself. No one could match the level of torment he inflicted on himself, suffering silently and in secret for each and every mistake he'd ever made. For each and every wrong choice. Adam had no idea. But how could he - blinded as he was by the lies and hypocrisy that heaven used to control everyone and everything?

Lucifer couldn't blame him for that. He'd been blind too, once. Adam still was - and at this rate maybe always would be. That wasn't up to Lucifer. Only Adam himself could choose to open his eyes and see the truth for what it was. That heaven used people for their own ends, caused them unimaginable suffering all in the name of 'redemption' or 'cleansing'...and threw them away when they were of no more use to them or broke their stupid rules. They'd done it to Lucifer, and now they'd done it to Adam too.

The struggling beneath him changed - the air becoming static-charged with fear so strong that Lucifer could practically taste it, and it drew him from his inner musings, blinking a bit in surprise as he focused on Adam once more. What had him so terrified? Lucifer wasn't actively trying to kill him, hell he wasn't even hurting him, and yet Adam was reacting so primally that it caught the Fallen by surprise, his grip tightening on the chain as he sent a pulse of power through it, a soul-deep command to calm down. Not as powerful as it would be if Lucifer held his contract...but strong enough to exert at least some compulsion to obey.

"You can't rip it off. Stop fighting me and I'll take it off again once you calm down. I'm not gonna kill you, or lock you up, or whatever the fuck else you might be thinking. This is Hell. Unlike heaven, free will is actually a fucking thing here, whether I like it or not. But I'm not gonna sit back and let you talk shit either, so I suggest you settle the fuck down if you want it off at any point in the near future."

@lettherebemonsters

@lettherebemonsters asked: " Oh fuck no."

( Sinner Adam at Lu! Lol thanks for the follow!)

"Well well well...would you look at what we have here."

Lucifer was damn near purring the words, a smug little grin forming on his lips as he leaned in close (the fact that he was hovering in the air to be taller than the other was totally beside the point). Oh this was almost too good. Adam? A Sinner? Trapped in his domain? He had to admit, it made him more than a little gleeful. How the mighty have fallen, huh? Wait...fallen...HAH! Oh that was too good. He giggled, wings fluttering to send him in a lazy loop before bringing him right in front of Adam again, this time sitting in midair and crossing one leg over the other as he leaned forward to rest his elbow on his knee and his chin in his hand - still grinning.

"What, not happy to see me? And here I thought you'd be excited to finally see what it was like for me. No? Awwww shame. I'm almost hurt."

[lovelynarusasu]

it's interesting how even among Sasuke stans we have such diverging opinions. im ''pro-Sasuke'' but i certainly don't think he should have killed the Kages or destroyed Konoha. i certainly don't think that Naruto doesn't deserve him, or that team Taka is found family. now this is my understanding of Sasuke and it's not perfect, and here im only considering points of views not judging people.

but let’s assume Sasuke destroys the village and kills the Kages. then what? everyone's dead and then what? he accomplishes his revolution by becoming a ''god'' of the darkness and then what? well then Sasuke's alone, bearing an immense burden by himself, forever. it's not justice nor peace, it's violence against the world and against himself that doesn't solve anything, especially not for him. imo what's great about Sasuke is that he questions everything, and that he keeps growing throughout the manga, which are not things most other characters do. it's not his revenge that’s great - it's the feelings and questioning behind it. it’s his will to change the system, not his will to kill people. the more Sasuke embraced revenge (his fight with Danzo being the climax), the darker and crueler he became. so what's so great about Sasuke destroying Konoha, killing the Kages, getting rid of his bond with Naruto. the fact that the world would be ''in peace'' thanks to Sasuke's eternal suffering? thanks to him being a martyr, truly alone and miserable for the remainder of eternity? can he even bring peace to the world from such a dark and cruel place? i admire his seflessness, ambitions and wish for peace. but to me, there’s no peace until he’s at peace.

now i also don't really get the concept of being anti Naruto. i'm not saying Naruto is perfect (and this goes without saying but boruto is not canon so that’s not included), imo he lacks exactly what makes Sasuke so interesting which is critical thinking (or his critical thinking is just drowned in his toxic positivity and fear of being rejected). yet Naruto is the only remaining person who is alive whom Sasuke loves and who loves him back (however you want to understand that love), and the only remaining person who gets somewhat close to understanding him (imperfectly, obviously). i'm not gonna get into the fact that they have strong feelings for each other since this is the basic premise of the entire manga. so once again - Sasuke kills Naruto to be truly alone and rule the world from the darkness. then what? what's so great about being truly alone for the rest of his life exactly? how is it helping Sasuke to heal, grow, and find peace? or isn't it what you’d want for him - to be at peace at last? Shippuden’s ending should have been handled differently, i think there should have been a discussion between them about Konoha and about them either entirely reforming it together or leaving it together (but then it wouldn't be a shōnen anymore would it). but either way does Naruto's will to ''bring Sasuke back to Konoha'' means that Naruto is bad for Sasuke? (especially considering that Naruto is willing to wait for Sasuke, and to have him living out of the village i believe. again post chp698 is trash). Naruto simply doesn't want Sasuke to be alone, that's it. and about Konoha, i think that Naruto would naturally become more critical / honest with himself once reunited with Sasuke - once he can feel safe and loved and let go of his fear of rejection and thus of his illusions. Naruto and Sasuke learn and grow by being with each other, as the manga repeatedly shows. i think Naruto is actually the only person who can help Sasuke find peace, because he is the only person and the only thing left in the world whom Sasuke cares about. Naruto is also the only person left who truly cares about Sasuke. i believe that Sasuke deserves to feel loved, and to love in return (again, however you wish to interpret that love), which is obviously only possible with Naruto at that stage. sure it's an imperfect love but from both sides it is a selfless, deep, understanding love - unlike what Sakura, Karin or Hinata would have to offer. Naruto never went after Sasuke for himself, he went after him at the risk of losing everything he ever dreamed of (recognition from his village, friends, Hokage title etc in Konoha) precisely because he couldn't stand the thought of Sasuke suffering on his own. simply because of that. Sakura's actions on the other hand were motivated by her suffering which had nothing to do with Sasuke's. and Karin...

which brings me to team Taka. Sasuke freed Jūgo and Suigetsu (among many other people), so it's understandable they would feel grateful, and their connection to Orochimaru also brings them closer. yet Sasuke used them as tools to obtain power, he never considered them friends. again this is just the narrative itself but Sasuke said countless times that he had only one remaining bond and we all know who that is. i would have liked for them to be friends tbh, but at that point in Sasuke's character development he was way too focused on revenge to care about anything else. i'm not saying he didn't care at all – again Sasuke is a deeply caring and loving person, so yes he cares a minimum. but at this point he only thinks of his goal and never forgets about it for one second, and he willingly chooses to surround himself with people who are not likely to make him forget about it either (again, we know who is the only person likely to make him forget about his revenge, or even to become more important than his revenge). Taka are together as a team to cooperate, not to become friends. for all he knew, Sasuke left Jūgo and Suigetsu for dead at the Kage summit. for all he knew, he killed Karin when killing Danzō. (yet when he reunites with Naruto during the war shortly after, he keeps protecting and saving him even when Naruto tells him to protect other people instead. they also immediately fight together in perfect harmony. and get soulmate tattoos. just the narrative) and Karin oh Karin. SasuKarin has to be one of the ships i find the most disturbing (no hate though, it’s just very ooc). first of all, she wasn't a prisoner like Suigetsu and Jūgo and she decided to follow Sasuke with very questionable intentions in mind. even after he sacrificed her she kept being obsessed with him for absolutely no other reason than his looks/chakra. Karin can be an interesting character (an Uzumaki at that) but we never see them bonding over their past experiences or shared feelings or whatnot because there is simply nothing between them. indeed all there is to their relationship is Karin’s powers being useful to Sasuke, and Sasuke’s looks/chakra being attractive to Karin. well more accurately, Karin being SO infatuated with his looks/chakra that she constantly harasses him while completely ignoring his feelings. he keeps telling her to back off, or looks really displeased/freaked out as she touches him (again i can't help mentioning how this is also how he reacts to Sakura touching him but certainly not how he reacts to Naruto touching him), yet she simply doesn’t care. she does not know nor try to know his feelings and thoughts, indeed they never have any meaningful talk. she simply keeps behaving like a creep whose intentions are explicitly s*xual. so it is true that i sometimes wonder how it could be possible to be anti Jiraiya for instance but then to suddenly accept Karin’s behavior.

then there’s Madara. again you stan who you want – no hate. it’s not even that i deeply care about him, but it seems that Sasuke tends to be associated with him somehow. it puzzles me a little bit considering that Madara/Obito helped Itachi kill the clan Sasuke so dearly cared about. so being ''pro Uchiha'' by being ''pro Madara'' is not something i understand either (being ''pro Uchiha'' is very unclear in itself) considering that he really didn't mind helping Itachi kill his own clan. that was not very pro Uchiha of him. so yes Sasuke and Madara both want to change the system, but certainly not in the same way. Sasuke was under Madara's influence for a little while but ultimately went against him. Madara is an interesting character alright, but he's mostly just killing everyone around him indiscriminately. Uchihas, Jinchūriki, and pretty much anyone who disagrees with him - you name them, he kills them all. certainly not what Sasuke wants to do. Sasuke asks questions, takes time to think, to observe, and actually avoids killing people as much as he can (the samurais at the Kage summit being the only exception, emphasizing the climax of his descent into darkness at that point). Sasuke wants to change the system, out of love. Madara wants to control the system, rather out of arrogance imo. he thinks he knows better than everyone and is better than everyone, and tellingly plans a revolution in which you either agree with his plan or die. he's not acting out of love at all at that point. is it so much better than Konoha, i wonder. and if one condemns Itachi for his crimes (understandably), then how can one not condemn Madara, i wonder also. plus Sasuke is a teenager, he's figuring out his identity and values and gets easily influenced at times. Madara is a grandpa who's had a lot of time to figure that out already.

anyway thanks for reading. we have different points of view and thanks to everyone sharing their thoughts on here, i thought a lot too. you might feel attacked or offended by my post (hopefully no) but it’s absolutely not my goal, this is not a hate post. i just wanted to contribute to the debate, and im open to respectful and meaningful dialogue. you are free to think whatever you want about Naruto, obviously. i guess maybe i just don't want Sasuke to be a martyr nor a tyrant, and maybe also Sasuke is gay.

[mochiable]

— enough. (a)

REQUESTED — hello!! i really like your work and how you write. could i request a scenario about han jisung cheating on reader and her forgiving him every time but then she can’t stay with him anymore and they have a big fight? sorry if it’s so specific, but i think you’d do a great work with this! i’ll understand if you don’t want to do it though, have a nice day!

wc: 1.7k

warnings: toxic relationship, mentions of cheating, swearing, emotional pain

requests are open!

you were fed up. jisung kept shouting your name in the distance, but you didn't want to know any more, you didn't want to hear any more. you were tired of everyone taking you for a naïve fool who didn't realise what was going on around you. ‘poor thing, she has no idea he slept with five other girls’, ‘i feel so sorry for her, how come she's still with him?’ you didn't know, you really didn't know how you could still be with him. maybe they were all right, you were a sucker, but that was going to change, you weren't going to put up with any more humiliation, and much less coming from him.

as soon as you arrived at the flat you shared with your now ex-boyfriend, you locked yourself in your room and took your suitcase out of the wardrobe to start storing your most necessary belongings. you didn't know where you were going to go, you didn't want to bother anyone, but it was either that or sleep in the street or stay in a forty square metre flat with the person you least wanted to see right now. either of the first two options was better than the third one, anyways.

when you finished putting all your clothes away and headed to the bathroom to pick up your make-up and all your creams you heard the front door open loudly and as hurried footsteps followed by several curses headed towards the bedroom.

“what are you doing?” the dark-haired boy asked watching you from the bathroom door, looking through the mirror as you put all the products in your vanity case, hands trembling and clutching things tightly.

“dancing a tango, wanna be my partner?” you replied sarcastically, taking all the courage you had left and turning around to face him, “what the fuck do you think I'm doing, jisung? i’m leaving,” you spat angrily, moving towards the door and bumping your shoulder against his to walk back into the room.

“no, no, no,” he repeated, shaking his head repeatedly as he moved closer to you and tried to get your attention, “listen to me, please listen to me," he pleaded, reaching up to you and turning your face to his with his hands on your cheeks, “it’s not what it looks like, i swear.”

“isn't it? let me guess," you began, bringing your hands up to his and roughly pulling them away from your face, “was it her who kissed you? or maybe, oh, i know, you drank too much and couldn't control yourself?” you roared angrily, pushing him hard in the chest, pushing him two metres away from you, “fuck you, jisung! i’ve had it. you've done nothing but humiliate and despise me. fuck, why can't you take me seriously for once? am i a joke to you, huh? is that it? do you think i’m so deluded as to cheat on me not just once but five times? do you enjoy watching me being mocked and laughed at behind my back? ‘oh poor girl, her boyfriend cheats on her and she keeps chasing after him like an idiot because she can't stand on her own two feet’!”

at first, your age difference was the reason for thousands of messages and threats directed at you. you were only three years older than him, and he was already an adult, you didn't see the problem, you both loved each other, or so you thought. the comments soon went from ‘old predator whore’ to ‘dumb slutty little girl’. you had to put up with how they came on to your boyfriend, and how he did nothing, smiled and even flirted back. however, when a boy came up to you, he seemed to wake up and didn't hesitate to shoo him away.

“no, that's not true. please, y/n,” he came back to you with a desperate expression on his face, managing to cradle your cheeks again and wipe away the tears you hadn't realised were falling from your eyes, “of course i take you seriously, darling. you're my everything. they're lying, i swear, y/n. i’d never do that to you, you have to believe me.”

you pushed him away from you again, and ran your hands through your hair, tousling it and burying your face in your hands. the moment you looked up again, you found your face reflected in the small mirror of the canterano in the room. a haggard, weak, sultry face. you dropped onto the bed, you were exhausted and you knew that this argument had only just begun.

“enough, enough,” you murmured, holding back the sob that was about to escape your throat, “stop lying, just stop! you don't love me, jisung. you never have and you never will. why do you want to keep me here if all you do is make me suffer?”

“no, that’s not true. i do love you, y/n,” he replied softly, crouching down in front of you until his eyes were level with yours. he brought his hands to yours, but you pulled away and stood up again, laughing bitterly.

“you have a terrible way of loving then,” you said, turning around and reaching for your suitcase, but jisung was quicker and wouldn't let you.

“i’m not letting you leave, not without sorting this out,” he said resolutely, snatching the suitcase from you and setting it in a corner, “it’s after midnight, you're not going out at this hour.”

“so now you care? where were you all those times i had to come home alone in the middle of the night because my boyfriend preferred to cheat on me with someone else?” you asked, moving forward again to grab the suitcase, but he got in the way and grabbed your arm, pulling you away from your things. you tried to pull away, but you knew he wasn't going to let go until you two fixed this, so you decided to continue, “you don't have to worry, there's no one out there who's going to hurt me more than you. you can stay calm.”

“tomorrow you can leave if you want, but tonight you're staying, okay? i can't let you leave at this hour, i’m not gonna let you," the grip on your arm was beginning to intensify, but he released you immediately when he saw the expression of discomfort on your face. he unhesitatingly wrapped you in an embrace and pressed you against his body, stroking your hair and resting his head on top of yours, “please stay, love. stay with me tonight.”

“how many others have you told this to? huh? how many others have you told to stay the night with you?” you asked between whimpers against his chest, clutching the sides of his t-shirt tightly in helplessness, “you treat me like shit, you cheat on me, you humiliate me and then you have the balls to tell me you love me.”

jisung, seeing that his words were having the opposite effect to the one they were intended to have, lifted your face and brought it close to his. he brushed your noses in a gentle but subtle gesture and, caressing the lower part of your eyes, he leaned towards you until your lips made contact.

however, the butterflies in your belly that you once wished would never disappear had, indeed, died. none of them was left. because jisung, with his lies and deceit, had killed them off one by one. until the last one that had remained until tonight couldn’t stand it anymore and vanished just like her sisters, leaving an empty hole in your stomach that resembled the one you had in your heart.

still wide-eyed, you brought your hands to his, which rested on your cheeks, and lowered them. jisung gradually broke the contact of your lips, until finally he rested his forehead on yours and let out an agitated sigh.

“you’re staying, right?” he asked once he’d pulled away from your face, looking at you with sympathetic eyes. but you no longer believed anything, you no longer trusted him.

“what would i gain by staying, jisung? i can’t stand any more humiliation,” you answered with a broken voice, trying with all your might he wouldn’t see you cry again. you hated showing weakness in front of him at times like this. you felt that if you did, he’d won again and you were tired of losing.

“please, y/n, please. you can't do this to me,” he growled desperately when you pulled away from him and went to pick up your suitcase. he tried to catch you when he saw you walking towards the door, but you turned and raised your hand, putting it in front of his face and telling him to shut up.

“i can't do this to you? i’m not the one who sent our relationship to hell, jisung. you decided to flirt with other girls, you decided to make out with them and you alone decided to fuck them. you’re the only son of a bitch here, and i’m not going to put up with you treating me like rubbish anymore,” you finished, taking the keys off your key ring and leaving on the front porch the one that opened the flat that was no longer yours. then, you turned to him and started to memorize all the details of his face, before saying your last goodbye, “have a nice life, han jisung.”

you left that apartment putting an end not only to a relationship, but to a lifestyle that had been destroying you for months. you didn’t know how you were going to overcome everything that had happened, but what you were sure about was that you weren’t going to go back and, evidently, you weren’t going to let anyone else treat you as if you weren’t a human being.

jisung’s punishment would be to wake up and remember everything he had and everything he could have continued to have if he hadn’t screwed everything up. now, when he got home he’d only find a cold and empty apartment. but that didn’t compare to how you’d felt during the last months of your relationship, and now it was his turn to feel the worst that can come from a toxic relationship, helplessness and resentment.

[justasimplesinner]

Please for the love of fuck give me a happy ending to the riddler/scarecrow breaking hcs that may or may not start off with the reader running into them again and being understandably pissed. I just want to throw a vase at Eddie. I can have a mature conversation with Johnathan with some raised voices and some crying from both parties but I want to throttle that green goblin lookin motherfucker. I want to see fear in that man's eyes as I curbstomp his stank ass for living in my head and never paying rent. Cause that shit broke me no pun intended.

I'm a soft bitch I need someone to put a bandaid on the hurtie and kiss is to make it feel better.

ugh, you fuckin' softies. continuation of this post

Arkham Knight!Riddler getting his happy ending hcs:

like i stated in the previous post, you two may have not been together anymore, but that didn't mean he'd leave you alone. you were the last bit of his sanity, at this point, he didn't know how to live without you. he was constantly lying to himself and you about the motives behind his calls and visits, but truth was, he was just trying to cling on. he couldn't let you go, you were his raft in the middle of the fucking ocean, if he let you go, he'd... he wouldn't survive that. he didn't know how

but it doesn't mean that this whole thing sat well with you. fucking bastard, neglects you for years, treats you like the very dirt he walks on and now has the gall to fucking invade your private space? ruin you completely? it's like it didn't matter if you were with him or not, he'd still find a way to fucking destroy you. and you, on one hand, genuinely wanted out. you wanted him out of your life, because you had only one and you didn't want to live it in misery, you didn't want to just suffer and take it like a good puppy. you weren't even sure he realised the extent to which he fucking hurt you, because he was constantly focusing on himself and no one else, because selfishness was his coping mechanism and he wouldn't change

it was only logical that at some point, you'd have enough. you didn't want to fucking live like this. he didn't have a right to just sit there and do nothing and yet simultaneously do damage. he was a grown fucking man and it was time he made a grown fucking choice

– Well, well, well, look who decided to finally show up-... – you didn't give him the chance to finish, your fist connecting hard with his nose, or maybe it was his cheek, though you hoped it was his eye so it'd hurt the most. You didn't really know, you didn't really care, you've had fucking enough. You knew he was there, in your house, before he even opened his yapping mouth, and you didn't fancy being greeted in your only safe (or, apparently, not-so-safe) space by a fucking insult from the man responsible for all your current misery.

You didn't feel a pang of regret, quite the contrary, his stumbling form and widened eyes gave you this weird feeling of satisfaction. You kind of understood why Batman did what he did, beating Ed's ass was just too rewarding.

– I've had fucking enough of you and your stupid charade! – you didn't plan on beating around the bush anymore, it was time he was fucking faced with the consequences of what he did.

He didn't have the time to recover from your last blow before the first thing you could grab collided with his shoulder - a vase, apparently, and it shattered into small pieces upon impact. Great, now he fucking ruined your favourite vase, too, as if your life wasn't enough for him!

– You have no right to fucking invade my house and treat me like shit even after I've dumped you! – with every word, with every step you took forward, he took one back, eyes wide in genuine fear as he tried to back away from you, maintain a safe distance, as if anything could save him from your wrath now.

– If I mean nothing to you, then why the fuck are you even here?! Why the fuck do you insist on getting me all tangled up in your stupid games?! I'm not gonna fucking sit here and take it like an obedient pet just because you can't get over the fact that we're not together anymore! – you raged on, and you had no intention of stopping, you watched him back away, you watched him stupidly bump into the side of your couch and fall on his stupid fucking ass. He deserved to fall on the floor, not on a set of nice, comfy pillows. But he had no way out now. He had nowhere to run, not when you fucking rounded up on his shock-still form.

– I-... – he dared to try and interrupt you and it was truly the last straw, it was all you needed to have angry tears blur your vision and your hands clenched in fists again.

– You never even fucking apologized to me for anything either! Did it ever fucking occur to you that if, instead of tormenting me and calling me an idiot, you just fucking said you're sorry, pushed your idiotic pride aside and genuinely fucking said you're sorry, then I would've taken you back?! That maybe we wouldn't be here, in this fucking situation, if you just weren't selfish for once and apologized for all the shit you did to me, all the pain you've put me through-

– I'm sorry. – it was so quiet you almost didn't hear it. So shaky and breathy, so fucking... guilty. Heartbroken. So utterly pathetic. Just like he was, just like he looked. Just like you wanted him to be, but now that he was, you hated it. You hated his glossed over, wide eyes, the shame in them, the guilt, the pain. You hated his arms, slightly risen in a protective manner because he expected another blow. He deserved another one, but... it's like he was just a child then. Just this small, broken boy that was afraid to admit he was wrong, that was afraid of the punishment that awaited for him. And all over again, he made you want to pull him close to your chest and kiss it all better, make it so he'd never experience this pain again. And you hated yourself for it.

you've destroyed the fucking dam then. you haven't heard this man apologize to you once in your entire life, and suddenly, you were swarmed with sorries, with regrets and sorrows and his tears. suddenly, he remembered every smallest thing he ever did that made you upset, and he apologized over and over, for everything and anything, and you thought he was going to suffocate with how he was crying and rambling on your couch

god, he wasn't fucking worth it, you knew that, but suddenly, he was in your arms again, and you were soothing his shaking form, again. you were back there to ground him, to comfort him, to make him feel loved, even if he didn't deserve it. you were there to listen to his - probably empty - promises to change, even though you knew he most likely didn't have the power to change at this point, and god dammit - you believed it. or wanted to believe it. you wanted to believe that maybe you were important and that maybe he will put the effort in changing for you this time as you kissed him breathless and let him cling onto you for dear life. you wanted to believe that he deserved a(nother) second chance and that there was still hope for him as you clung right back. you missed having him right there, in your embrace. despite everything. and maybe you were just plain out stupid, or maybe he truly made a promise he, for once, intended to keep. and honestly? you weren't sure if you were ready to find out

you also apologized for throwing a vase at him. he wasn't mad. if he was, you'd throw another one. he had no right to be mad

Arkham Knight!Jon getting his happy ending hcs:

Jon genuinely thought about seeking you out, hoping that maybe that would give him some closure, that it would make him able to work and function properly again. but he realised how stupid, how selfish and disgusting that was. he swore to himself he won't even fucking force you to look at his ugly mug again. he had no right to come to you, expecting the person he pushed away in order to work to help him get back to work. he didn't fucking deserve to even breathe the same air as you

he kept tabs on you though. he had to know where you lived now, where you worked, and knowing where you were at all times would be ideal too, but he didn't dare go that far as to have someone stalk you. it's not out of some creepy obsession, it's actually out of... concern. sounds ridiculous, especially since he hadn't expressed any concern for you for the past few months, but he... he really didn't want to ever hurt you again. even accidentally. even if you were to be collateral damage. he needed to know the places he could target and the places he couldn't, he needed to know when, where and on who he could test his freshest batches and when, where and on who he couldn't. he hurt you enough. he destroyed your mind enough. he wasn't about to subject you to your worst fears too

but a reunion was inevitable, it seemed. one way or another, fate was bent on bringing you two back together. and so, he missed the fact that you changed your jobs and started working at Ace Chemicals, front desk actually, passing around exactly the information he needed about the company, it's building and resources

You genuinely couldn't believe your fucking eyes. You couldn't believe his cheek. The gall he had to be standing right here, in front of you, in his tattered, dirty "glory", milky eyes seeming wild behind the mask, as if he didn't expect you to be here. As if he hadn't planned it all.

– What are you doing here? – you didn't even have the strength to get angry at him anymore. You just resigned yourself to the fact that he was going to haunt you every single day for the rest of your life, be it in person or as a fleeting thought in your mind. You weren't allowed to get rid of him. You weren't allowed to forget.

– I could be asking you the same question. – his tone was hard to decipher. As if it was emotionless, but at the same time wasn't. Like there was something behind it, something he didn't want you to see. Something he himself wasn't ready to face.

You were already too exhausted mentally to give a shit.

– I work here. – you sighed, using that mocking tone he always used on you whenever you asked "stupid" questions. Funny, how one day he tells you there are no stupid questions and that you can always ask away, that he will always listen, and then treats you like an idiot when you do.

And yet you still loved his sarcasm, loved his quips and biting remarks. This was who he was, and you did, after all, love him as a whole.

– I didn't know that. – you were actually ready to believe that, what with how he was still standing there, practically in the doorway. He didn't round up on you yet, he didn't corner you like you were his prey. Actually, it seemed he thought you were the predator, like he was... scared to come closer.

Maybe that was better for the two of you. Who know what you'd do if he started to come at you like he owned you and this whole place.

– Oh, didn't you now? – you couldn't allow him to know though. It was his turn to get the cold shoulder for once. Not that he cared enough to be hurt by it. Not that he ever cared. About you, about anything. Anything but his work.

Jesus, fuck, you couldn't break down in front of him. You already did in the past. Way too many times. You weren't going to give him the satisfaction of having the upper hand.

– You shouldn't've gotten a job here. – he seemed to feel as if he had it anyway – I work with chemicals on a daily basis and you know I'm planning to gas the entire city, it is only logical for me to take advantage of having a huge chemical factory right in the middle of it. It was obvious I'd come here sooner or later. – every word he said, he took a step closer to the desk. Every word he said, he beat you down into the ground harder. Obviously, you were in the wrong. Yet again. Always your fault. Why would you distract him from his goal yet again? Why would you meddle? It seemed that even if you didn't want to, you proved to be an inconvenience, a chink in the chain that was his research. It didn't matter what you did, it was never going to be good enough.

You two weren't compatible, after all.

– Yep, I'm stupid, I get it. Go on, psychoanalize me too, tell me how I did it knowingly just because I wanted to see you again. – you couldn't stop yourself from snarling at him. As always, he only came to you to break down what you've so carefully built back together. It was always that way, if you really thought about it. Every time you were starting to get used to his absence, starting to truly live on your own, he suddenly appeared, acted like everything was fine, acted like he loved you, and you believed it like the fool you were. You believed it and then he left you alone again. You believed it and then you woke up to an empty bed again. Every single time.

Maybe you really were a fucking idiot.

– And did you? – or maybe he was one, because this comment only resulted in riling you up more and yet he dared to fucking ask.

– I fucking hate you Jon. – you weren't ready to believe that what he just did at your words was flinching. That it hurt enough for him to physically move away. – If I wanted to look at your face again, I'd just turn on the news.

– I don't want to hurt you. – that was bullshit. He never did anything else. Hurting you was what he was best at, and he prided himself in it. – But I need access to the vast supply of chemicals your workplace has to offer. – even when you two fucking argued, it always came down to his work. Even when you told him you hated him, all he offered back was that he didn't care and came here just to get shit done. He didn't even fucking care enough to at least say he hates you back.

– You don't want to hurt me? That's a new one. – you were really tempted to just roll your eyes and go back to work. To ignore him, like he always did to you. But suddenly, you realised just how close he was. Practically leaning over the desk. His scarred face hooded and covered in a mask, hidden away from you. That face you wanted to stare into every time you woke up, that face you wanted to be the last thing you saw every day you went to sleep. That face that you wanted to kiss better, to make him know. Make him know you didn't mind. Make him know he was still handsome as ever. He never believed you, and you saw that. You saw that very clearly in his milky eyes. It's like they were fogged, like his mind was surrounded with fog and blurred reality with imagination, like there was this barrier between the two of you.

It wasn't there at first. But then he changed, and you didn't really know who he was anymore.

– I'm sorry. – it felt like pity. Like he pitied you. Like he was saying it just so you'd shut the fuck up and move out of his way at last.

And maybe it was better if you did.

– Save it. I won't get in the way of your plans, don't worry. I'm not getting paid enough to sacrifice myself for this place either way. – you were gathering your things, leaving the computer on, the information unguarded. You could use a day off, anyway. To cry in peace or whatever.

No such luck apparently, since Jonathan immediately had you in a grip, his fingers flexing against your arms.

– No, (Y/n). I'm sorry.

you really weren't ready for that conversation. not at all. you would never be ready for that. seeing Jon apologizing, hell, seeing him crying, genuinely crying in front of you, over you, wasn't something you ever expected to see. Jonathan, despite being a skilled psychologist, never really talked about his emotions. he was always hellbent on talking through yours - well, at the beginning he was, until the whole "spiralling into his obsession" thing started. then, he stopped, because he didn't have time for you. or, as he now explained, didn't have the courage to face how much he's hurt you. you really wanted to fucking punch him then, when he told you that he knew. that he knew all the time what he was doing, and yet never stopped, as if he purposefully sabotaged your relationship so you'd leave him. you knew he had his problems and you couldn't blame him for that, but you could blame him for running away from them. you could blame him for treating you like shit since he woke up from his short coma after the incident with Killer Croc. hell, he took the blame full on

you've never heard him so... bare. so raw. so vulnerable. when he apologized to you, thanked you for everything you ever fucking did, for always helping him, for sticking by him for that long, for enduring him and showing him how it feels to be loved, he was but a broken man. for the first time in... assumably ever, Jonathan didn't hide behind any walls and just... let the words flow. both of you knew that wasn't enough to compensate for what he did. nothing will ever be enough. he will never give you back everything that he took from you, and your heart will never fully heal. even if you two got back together, he wouldn't resign from his research either, and more likely than not, it was all going to end exactly the same, with him hiding away from you because apparently, acting like he didn't love you saved you from the heartbreak, and you having to mend your broken heart on your own, alone, knowing you will never get all your lost time back. you will never get back the time you spent crying in your home because you knew he wasn't coming. and yet, you - like the idiot you probably were - dived right back in. because you fucking loved him. and maybe it was stupid, and maybe his arms clinging onto you as you kissed him for the first time in months were stupid too, but if being stupid meant being happy, even for just one moment, you were going to take it

Jonathan still had a lot to make up for. you didn't think he will ever manage, honestly. but you were excited to see him try

[theoriginalcarnivorousmuffin]

what's your take/thoughts on sauron or the one ring? i feel like you're gonna roast him so much. also, yes, i'm the same anon and this is for research purposes

Ha, hello again, welcome back.

That said, I'm actually not, to me Sauron's a very interesting guy that we don't get to see much of in the original series. That's the end of Sauron, where he ends up after everything that's happened to him.

To me, Sauron's story is essentially a classic tragedy, a noble character, through an inherent and lethal flaw, makes a series of increasingly terrible choices that ultimately lead to his doomed end at the end of the series.

Or, in the case of what happened to Sauron, he got his ass kicked by lesser beings twice.

So let's go back to the beginning.

Sauron starts as Mairon, a proud, ambitious, but certainly not inherently evil Maia living in Valinor, the realm of the Middle Earth gods. The Maia, in Middle Earth lore, are essentially angels, and have not only no inherent form (Mairon's actually a giant ball of light and fire that can appear in various humanoid forms) but were created to help create the mortal world.

Mairon was a very talented, perfectionist, smith under the... we'll call him a smithing god, Aule. However, Mairon was unsatisfied with this and was intrigued by Melkior, a different god who was viewed as one of the most talented and innovative of the Valar. So, Mairon goes off to be his apprentice instead and then...

Well, Melkior becomes Morgoth, and if there is an inherently evil character in Tolkien's worlds then it's definitely Morgoth. Opinions vary on how willing a disciple Mairon was of Morgoth once true colors were revealed, but I fall on the Mairon being very internally conflicted.

I imagine he went through quite a bit of torture and hell on earth, and in the end, isn't all that fond of Morgoth. Doesn't excuse him, of course, but he and everyone else has a miserable time.

During this time, Mairon also loses his name and becomes Sauron, the abhorrant one, and embraces his identity as torturer/despised enemy of the elves (who Mairon never saw much point of and doesn't see why Middle Earth was created for them let alone Men).

Morgoth declares war on the rest of the Valar, makes Middle Earth a hell hole filled with monsters, and Sauron becomes his lieutenant. Various shit happens, Sauron gets tangled up in the Luthien and Beren mess, loses to them, and spends a good chunk of the first age in a coma somewhere recovering from his wounds inflicted by Morgoth in punishment.

Morgoth is imprisoned by the Valar, that doesn't work so well, he escapes and there's a giant battle. Morgoth and company lose, Morgoth is banished into the void, Sauron, rather than return to Valinor and face punishment for his crimes, flees.

And here's where he could have had his moment of redemption. He could have returned to Valinor and owned up to his actions. Or, barring that, he could have let go. Morgoth is effectively dead, he can leave his identity behind, and he can move on.

Sauron can't move on.

Instead, a good while later, he starts building up an army in Mordor and then arrives in Eregion, an elven kingdom, in the disguise of a Maia from Valinor arrived to teach elves great smithing tricks. There, he and Celebrimbor invent ring craft and practice it for three-hundred years, and I don't think it's a stretch of imagination to say that they were friends.

Only, Celebrimbor didn't quite trust him and created the three rings for the elves in secret. Well, Sauron revealed his true intentions after creating the one ring, making the men who had been gifted rings by him his slaves and making the dwarves more indifferent and greedy (they proved hard to corrupt). He ends up torturing Celebrimbor, using his body as a banner, and sacks Eregion.

And here's the thing, he didn't have to do any of this. He could have stopped, could have become Annatar as he was pretending to be, but no, Sauron just keeps going.

Anyways, Numenor, the kingdom of men, go to war against him and win. This is pathetic, Sauron has been defeated by mortals, and he's taken captive on their island. There he sits, for a good long while, until political drama comes up and a very corrupt man seizes the throne and marries his cousin.

Long and short, Sauron convinces them all to be Satanists and to invade Valinor, a land mortals are never meant to touch. Well, God doesn't like that, and smites not only the invaders but the entire island of Numenor. It sinks into the sea, Sauron's probably hated water and been terrified of drowning ever since.

Sauron goes back to Mordor, but there's still a kingdom of men out there, those who fled from Numenor during the Satanist purges. They ally themselves with the elven kingdoms and make a last stand against Sauron.

Against all odds, Sauron distracting himself in a crucial moment, they defeat him by cutting off his finger. Sauron becomes a wraith, the ring falls into Isildur's hand, and the second age comes to an end.

For the entire third age, Sauron is off being a miserable wraith, and only towards the end regains his form (though not his fair form) and starts gathering forces in Mordor again. The ring floats at the bottom of a lake, then Gollum gets it, then Bilbo, then Frodo.

Then, against all odds, the Lord of the Rings happens and the ring is destroyed. Sauron is essentially defeated and will never have the power he ever wielded again.

Life is pointless, he's a fool, and the volcano is erupting. EDIT: An anon reminded me (warning, it’ll be a while til I get to your actual post and question), that Gil-Galad was very important! Sauron was gravely injured/died from the wounds inflicted on him by Gil-Galad, Isildur cutting off Sauron’s finger helped that along, perhaps, but was far from the killing blow.

[rodeo-boots]

Idk who all you write for--but I see your requests are open, and I'd love some Hosea x reader (gender neutral or female) and maybe some nsfw? I'm open to anything, be it vanilla to kink--write what you want! Or, if you dont write hosea, maybe you could write some for Javier x reader? Anything at all 💙💙💙 I love your work!

I've written Hosea for the first time here, so hopefully I could do him justice. Thanks for the request, I hope you'll like the result!

Rating: Explicit

Words: 2065

AO3

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"What are you reading there?" You stepped closer, your head tilted in curiosity, approaching Hosea where he sat at the table. It was still early morning, the chill not yet gone from the air, the rich scent of coffee spreading from Pearson's wagon.

"Oh, Good Morning." Hosea looked up at you, a kind smile shaping on his face as you placed a hand upon his shoulder to peer over it. "Actually, it's Notre-Dame de Paris, written by a French-man."

You quirked a brow, sitting down on the table-top in front of him. "Is it in French?"

A nod. Your curiosity spiked further.

"You can speak French?" Now, whatever sleepiness might've clouded your brain was gone for good, your stare trained on Hosea in expectancy of an answer.

The man chuckled, closing the book and putting it down on the table, almost sheepishly reaching up to rub the back of his neck. "Well, you learn some things travelin' as much as we did," he explained, though it was clear that wouldn't diminish your amazement. As far as you knew, neither Dutch nor Arthur had picked up any foreign languages on their way here.

"I picked up some words here and there, and before I knew it, I got through an entire book of these funny words." He patted the novel upon the table, crossing his legs when he leaned back.

"You surprise me every day," you spoke, hearing him chuckle yet again, looking up to catch the subtle shake of his head. You risked a glance into the book, flipping through a couple of pages, though the words upon the paper made little sense to you. "Could you teach me?" You asked, finding his stare once more. "It looks like nonsense now, but it'd probably be fun... learning a new language."

His eyes grew gentle, Hosea placing his hand over yours to squeeze it. You've noticed before, how cold his palms used to feel these days, but he wouldn't take your concern. "Later, my dear," he promised you, running his thumb over your knuckles. "First, we got work to do." And with that, he nudged you in encouragement, pushing himself off the chair in the next moment to start into the day.

After fleeing from Blackwater as sudden as you had to, most of your and the other's belongings had to be left behind. You could only guess that most things you have once held dear were now in the hands of Pinkertons, possibly scattered all around your former campsite and destroyed. But there had been no time to grief before. And what mattered now was that you got back onto your legs, the entire gang left in disarray after your previous hopes had been shut down so swiftly.

You didn't hate working, had no problem putting in the extra effort to make this camp into as much of a home as could be. It was only a faint hope, staying here for longer than a couple weeks a time, but at the moment, it was what you had left to hold onto, and with Dutch's certainty about his plans, who were you to raise your voice?

The day drew to an end before you knew it, the hay bales you had moved to the horses for the evening barely visible to your eyes by now. With a soft exhale, you reached up to wipe sweat from your brow, glad that the cold couldn't bother you much with all the exercise you've done.

Footsteps behind you alerted you of someone's presence, your head turning in time to focus on Hosea. A smile shaped upon your lips.

You still remembered the promise he had spoken in the morning hours, certain that with the day now done, you had plenty of time for a good language lesson.

"Excusez-moj, chèrie," he spoke sweetly, guiding his arms around your waist from behind, not planning to startle you in the slightest. He smiled against your neck, holding you close and gentle, the little hairs standing at attention upon your skin. "I don't mean to keep you from your tasks," he added, still keeping his arms in place. Although clearly, you had no issue with that.

"I'm all done here," you answered, leaning back in his embrace, placing your own hands above his on your front. "But I don't know how much knowledge I can absorb just now." A soft laugh escaped your lips, head tilting to find Hosea's gaze briefly. "Today's work has worn me out, I must say."

He hummed lightly, thoughtfully. "Now, what could we do about that?" His words drove heat to your cheeks, the sound of his voice reverberating through your entire being. You knew what he was alluding to, always able to decipher when he got into this very special mood.

"I reckon you'd still like a lesson, n'est-ce pas?" A shiver ran down your spine, your throat suddenly feeling rather dry. You nodded either way, eager to see where he was planning to take this.

Hosea released you, casting a look over his shoulder in contemplation, aware that John had taken his guarding post not too far from your location. "Not here," he said, gently taking your arm to lead you back into camp, your brow quirking when he gestured for John's tent.

"What would he say to that?" You chuckled, entering it still. After all the years you've known Hosea, he's constantly shown himself as more adventurous than a glance at him might indicate, keeping you on your toes with everything he came up with. This site surely wasn't the most outlandish you've loved one another in.

"I've given it to him, so I can use it should the need arise," Hosea answered easily, closing the tent flaps behind you. "Besides, he won't ever have to know," the man added, cupping your cheeks in his hands to bring you close for a kiss, a sigh slipping past your lips at his passionate movements.

Everything happened in a blur after the initial touch of your lips, clothing falling to the floor as Hosea led you towards the bed, shedding the fabric upon his frame just as well. You plopped down on the cot with a shaky laugh, trying to catch his lips again, though he got to his knees in front of you instead, peering up at you with ardor glinting in his eyes.

"You gonna speak French between my legs?" You giggled, your voice playful and cocky. It seemed to pique his interest.

"If that is what you so desire," he answered, cold palms running up the sides of your thighs, encouraging you to spread them for him in the next moment.

You bit down on your lower lip, your eyes glued to your sweetheart upon his knees, hands slipping into his short hair. A warm gust of air was what you felt first, as he leaned down, teasing you by kissing a trail up your thigh, moving on to the other one whilst pointedly ignoring your aching middle. "Hosea," you couldn't keep yourself from whining, fingers tightening in his hair.

He shushed you softly, glancing up at your face for a second before returning to his ministrations, the muscles in your stomach rippling the closer he got to your core. "Please–" your voice cut off into a soft moan, the sound entirely satisfied with his lips finding their target, kissing right where you needed to be kissed. Your eyes fluttered shut on their own, laying back to let Hosea work his magic, the sounds from your lips turning higher and sweeter with every precise swirl of his tongue.

Hosea used his fingers with equal precision, gently working you open around him, poking and prodding at all the spots that heightened your pleasure.

Could you speak any French, you would've encouraged him in the language he's taught himself, but alas, all that left your mouth were coos and mewls. You were melting beneath him, certain that there was no way for you to endure much longer, the pleasure within your core becoming unbearable to handle. "Darling, I'm gonna--" you warned him, the sound of your voice met with the sensations stopping altogether, a groan rumbling through your chest in frustration.

As much as you didn't want this moment to come to an end, you've been close just now– impossibly so, throwing an arm over your eyes when Hosea crawled over you. The breath still rang shakily through your lungs, your eyes not yet meeting his when he kissed his way up your body, running his palms over your sides until your skin perked up with goosebumps.

"Ne désespère pas," he whispered, mouthing his way up to your ear for his words to resound through you, another soft whine leaving your lips. Hosea pushed the arm away from your eyes, kissing the back of your hand before he entangled his fingers with your own. "Hello there," he smiled at you, your eyes peeking open to return the gesture in kind.

"Are you ready for more?" He asked softly, caressing your cheek with his free hand, his stomach resting in between your legs, a shift of your hips enough to offer you some much needed friction.

"S-Sí." You had tried, at least, to show him that you knew some words yourself.

Hosea chuckled gently, his thumb running over your jaw. "That would be Spanish," he pointed out, though there was no mocking edge to his tone, a breathless laugh leaving your own lips at the realization.

He kissed you once more, squeezing your fingers before getting to his legs, pulling your hips to the edge of the cot. His eyes found yours when he pushed inside, his own lips parting at the feeling of your tight walls around him.

Your legs found their way around his hips, settling there as if it were the only place for them to be, your breaths rattling in your chest. Hosea gave you time to adjust, careful and considerate as always, reaching down between your legs to touch you softly, purposefully keeping his ministrations brief and teasing.

"If only you'd know how good you're feelin'," he muttered, looking down at you as if he beheld a masterpiece, though to him, that was just what you were. "My beautiful darling."

He started moving slowly, rolling his hips for his cock to move deeper into you, drawing back and letting you feel his entire length with the next thrust forward. You moaned, grasping for his hands again to link your fingers, needing something to hold onto when he quickened his pace.

Soon enough, the sounds of skin slapping against skin filled the tent, possibly filtering through the thin walls as well, though neither of you held much of a care for that. You rocked back against his every movement, getting lost in the ardor surrounding you as your nails dug into the back of his hand. "Hosea–" his name was a mantra upon your lips by now, repeated like a prayer, with every time sounding more desperate than the last.

You were getting close all over again, feeling your orgasm build in your loins, your spine curving in an attempt to receive more friction at your sex. "Please, make me cum." He had to be getting close himself, thrusts turning more hurried and sloppy, his own voice raising in clear enjoyment.

"Of course, my dear," he stuttered only the slightest bit, reaching down to pleasure you as you had wished, angling his hips just right to hit that sweet spot within you. "Go'head," he encouraged, continuously fucking into you as the motions of his hand quickened, intended to drive you over the edge and beyond.

"Je veux vous entendre," he grunted, the sound of his French sending you spiraling out of control, your walls pulsating around him as your orgasm hit you like a train.

You cried out in delight, tossing your head back as he spent himself inside of you, driven to fulfillment by the feeling of you coming around him. He panted, propping his arms up on either side of your head as the pleasant aftershocks raked his body, his cock sporadically twitching inside of you.

Eventually, Hosea pulled out of you, sinking onto the cot by your side, his chest rising and falling as he gradually caught his breath. "Now that wasn't what I had planned for today's lesson."

[saberdeity]

𝐂'𝐦𝐞𝐫𝐞 𝐁𝐮𝐛 》𝐀𝐚𝐫𝐨𝐧 𝐇𝐨𝐭𝐜𝐡𝐧𝐞𝐫

pairings》aaron hotchner x fem ! reader 

summary》“C’mere, you can sit in my lap until I'm done” and “what? Does it feel good?” from the prompt lists 

warnings》smut, dirty talk, daddy kink, cock warming. 

word count 》1,208

a/n》Thank you anon for requesting! I really hope you like it ❤️

(not my gif, full credit goes to the owner) 

Aaron Hotchner was a workaholic, he wanted to be as good at his job as he possibly could be. To him this meant spending hours on each report making sure every word written was correct and good enough for the best.  Even on his mandatory days off, he was in the study, his eyes scanning the consultant cases in front of him. The only break he took was to get some coffee. The coffee was in order for him to forcefully keep his tired eyes from closing, sending him into the dark abyss of sleep. 

You knew there was only one good way to get him to relax and just let work go for a little while, you of all people understood how hard that was for him which is why you worked so well together. You walked into your shared bedroom, the beige walls with pieces of art art staring you whilst the huge bed laid in the middle of the room sadly, completely unused for hours, Walking into your bathroom, you decided to take a quick shower, with the plan you had in your head you wanted to be as sweet smelling as possible. You made sure to dry all of your hair completely knowing Aaron loved the way your hair naturally fell beyond your shoulders. You walked happily into your closet, picking out Aaron’s favourite set of your lingerie putting it on. Instantly, you felt a rush of confidence flow through you, a small smirk appearing on your freshly washed face. 

You weren’t usually the body confident type, you never admitted you looked beautiful or even good but when you looked in that mirror you thought you looked beautiful. You weren’t afraid to admit that which was a feeling you were naive to but Aaron had that effect on you. Aaron could magic confidence out of thin air. He could make your feel beautiful with just one look from his beautiful, safe brown eyes. 

You knocked on the door to the study, slowly opening it when you hear the soft sound of his voice allowing you to enter. You created the best puppy dog eyes you could when he looked over to you. 

“What’s wrong sweetie?” He asked glancing between the paper case in front of him and you quickly snapping his head back to you when he realised what you were wearing. His lip tucked in between his teeth as a small smirk appeared. He softly put down his pen, turning his chair completely towards you so he could state at you more. 

“I miss you” you whisper adorably, fiddling with the your fingers as you began to feel a little self conscious just standing in the spot light of Aaron’s gaze. 

“C’mere you can sit in my lap until I’m done” He smiles holding his calloused hand out to meet your soft ones, pulling you gently into his lap. 

You giggled with excitement, wrapping your arms around his broad frame, You buried your head into the crook of his neck, placing soft kisses to the sweet spots he has just below his jawline. A small accidental groan fell from his lips causing a confident smirk to form on your face.  

“Whatcha doing angel?” He smiled trying to carry on the report case in front of him but failing miserably. 

“Making daddy feel good” You whisper nibbling at his earlobe cheekily

“Be a good girl and let daddy finish his work” Aaron replied kissing your temple sweetly. 

“But I really need you” You whine grinding against him slowly: feeling how hard he was already. 

“I have an idea” he whispers lifting you off briefly, allowing him to take off his pants and boxers. Before you could even comprehend what was happening, he pulled you back onto him: pushing you down onto him agonisingly slowly. A soft but loud moan falling from your lips. 

“What? Does that feel good?” Aaron smirked, as he stilled your hips when you tried to move. 

“Mmhm” You mumbled nodding your head whilst bitting your bottom lip. Your head fell to his shoulder, your forehead leant against his collarbones as your breathing increased, desperately trying to keep your hips still whilst he continues to work. 

Towards the end you begin to get whiny sonf impatient, finding it near impossible not to move your hips against the full feeling of his cock inside you. 

“Just a few more sentences baby then I’m all yours” He whispers kissing your cheek softly 

You tried desperately not to move your hips against him, tears filled your eyes in need of some kind of relief from him. The minute the pen inn his hand hit the desk, he allowed you to move your hips against him, a huge sigh go relief leaving your body as you finally got the pleasure you’d been longing for. 

“God baby, you feel so good” Aaron whispers breathlessly, his huge, gorgeous hand placed firmly on your hips hard enough to leave bruises. A string of moans falling from your lips. 

His words only encourage your hips to move quicker, your mind screaming internally at how good he felt. You clenched around him unintentionally causing a deep moan to come from Aaron’s chest, a shock of pleasure running straight to you core. Your eyes met Aaron’s, love and relief behind his beautiful brown orbs. He could see and feel how close you were, the desperation in your hips were showing. 

“C-can I cum please?” You manage to whisper looking down to him with a wanting glare in them, not wanting to do anything without his permission. You were his good girl, nothing could change that. 

“Yes kitten cum for me, I’m right behind you” He groans in your ear, snapping his hips up to meet yours. Your eyes rolled to the back of your head, your hands gripping his shoulders tightly as you let your orgasm roll through you.The feeling of you clenching around him was more than enough to send him over the edge. His cum coating your walls as a string of moans fall from your lips and his. 

You collapse tiredly onto his chest, your head once again burying your head into his neck, calming down when you breathe in his infiltrating scent, it clouded your thoughts with a good feeling and you wanted that all day everyday; sometimes you were lucky enough to have that 

You stayed in each other’s embrace for a while, Aaron’s hand running over your spine comfortingly. You smiled down to him, your heart bursting at the beautiful smile plastered on his face; awakening the desperate need for him all over again. 

You slowly climbed off of him, standing in the door way of the study with a small smirk on your flustered face 

“There’s a perfectly made bed waiting to be ruined if you wanna join me?” You say cheekily smiling widely as you held out your hand for him to take. 

He smiled to you wider than you’ve ever seen as he takes your hand in his. 

“You’re gonna be the death of me” He giggles as you both run happily to your shared bedroom destroying the perfectly made bed in the middle of the room. 

[chuuyrr]

❀ headcannons for gon, killua, hisoka, illumi and chrollo with a clumsy s/o that gets flustered easily ❀

Note: thank you for requesting ! sorry it took so long HUHUHU enjoy xx 

(writing this kind of tired me out not gonna lie! five characters ! :0  and it was a challenge for me. i’ll add a gif sooner later, my internet is wonky lol, i’m okay no worries and i actually enjoyed writing this ! ^__^)

Gon Freecss

gon is the type of person who likes to hold hands with his sweet s/o.

the two of you would often hold hands, may it be in public or in private.

gon likes to hug you too and he'd often catch you off guard so it's a surprise. expect the unexpected [name]!

this boy is pretty affectionate when it comes to the one he loves, which is you.

so you were pretty much, a blushing mess all the time.

not that you were uncomfortable with the cute little things he does, you just simply get flustered easily.

your heart just can't seem to function properly from his touch. it always makes your heart race or skip a beat.

you just love it, the feeling, the sparks that it gives you!

gon is quite naive when it comes to your reaction so he'd mistake you for being sick because you'd be red.

"[name]-chan! your face is red and you're warm too!" gon claims, cupping your round face in his open palms. "are you ill?"

you feel your heart melt as your face rests in his warm hands, stammering, "U-UM, NO! I'M FINE!"

gon would often help you with your nen because it was a one of a kind.

you were a specialist, formerly a [nen] user.

it was really impressive of you to succeed it in such a young age, your power nurtured easily in such a short span of time.

it mostly gets out of your control because you can be clumsy at times.

one time, you had activated your nen without even notice!

you were rambling about gon about this [favorite dessert] store you saw.

when you flicked your wrist to wave your hand as you talked, your nen suddenly popped up out of nowhere and your natural reaction was to panic.

"A-AH!" you yelped, "I'm so sorry! I was rambling and I-I just—

gon held both of your hands, causing your heart to skip another beat as he leaned to your face.

this made your nen subside and your face blush red.

"calm down [name]-chan." he beamed a reassuring smile at you. "it's okay. i'm here! now continue what you were saying."

even if you find yourself annoying for rambling about the most random things, gon loved it whenever you ramble.

his eyes would seem to sparkle at the words the fell from your mouth as you talk.

"o-okay!" a smile, too, had appeared on your face.

as long as you are with gon, everything would be alright.

even if you can get clumsy and all that, you try your best to help gon in return. gon always has your back in everything.

"gon! let me help you!" you run up to him, nearly tripping yourself in the process.

"oh, thank you [name]-chan! you're the best!" gon winks at you.

ba dump.. there goes your heart once again.

Killua Zoldyck

killua would often tease you for getting flustered very easily.

you two can just be talking about chocolates, the next thing you know you have a dust of pink on your cheeks.

if he’s a cloud, you’re a strawberry.

he finds this behavior of yours really adorable.

“you’re being a strawberry again [name].” he laughs, causing your face to heat up. 

“shush!” you stammered, puffing your cheeks. 

killua likes to kiss your cheek and nose because of this, it makes your heart practically burst every damn time.

‘mwa’

you really liked his way of affection towards you, you find comfort and a sense of warmth.

asides from being a strawberry, killua also calls you, ‘clumsy strawberry’.

being the clumsy person you are, you’d often lose your balance or footing especially when he starts being affectionate and when teases you.

“come on! hurry up [name] or else you’ll fall behind.” said killua, calling you from a distance. you and killua were taking a hike with his friends, kurapika, leorio and gon.

“alright, alright i’m getting ther— AH!” you shrieked, tripping over a rock in the middle of the path.

“you are such a clumsy strawberry, [name]. but you’re cute.” killua sighs, chuckling as he caught you right on time before you fell frontwards. you were a blushing madman after that.

killua learned to never tease you to the point you’d let your nen loose from being flustered.

you had a pretty strong nen, you were a specialist after all. a former [nen type] user.

one time killua decided to mess with you, calling you cute names and poking your shoulder. it got to the point wherein he attempted to tickle you and when you choked out a laugh from his attempt, you nearly destroyed the room with your nen that had gotten unleashed. 

“OOPS.” you gulped, staring at the [color] aura faintly shrouding your palms. you looked around to see the once tidy room, a complete mess with the furnitures shoved back and downwards.

“i’m so sorry, i am never doing that again!” killua apologized after that, eyes wide. “are you okay [name]?!” 

“y-yeah.” you managed out, stifling a laugh as you scratched the back of your head.

and that’s why killua started helping you control your nen after seeing how powerful it was.

you were clumsy so there are times wherein you inevitably unleash it involuntarily.

killua made sure to help you every step of the way for you to harness that power with your full-control.

killua can be a tsundere and chocolate loving dork but he’s responsible.

“you’re getting the hang of it, that’s amazing [name]!” he cheered, watching you unleash your power under your control. “guess you’re no longer a clumsy strawberry huh?”

you blushed, “hey!”

“don’t worry, you’re still my strawberry.” killua winked, beaming you a smile and a finger gun. 

ba dump.. there goes your heart once again.

Hisoka Morow

hisoka adores his little fruit very much.

you were a one of a kind to be exact, you possessed great power that is even greater than his.

in fact, your strong nen could even become set free from your control because it’s just that strong.

luckily, you are able to control it thanks to his help!

hisoka is a great help whenever you need aid in concentrating and controlling because he makes you calm.

“just focus on me and relax, [name].” hisoka tells you calmly, gently holding your hands, feeling your aura grow and concentrate on your palms as you closed your eyes upon inserting focus.

but your nen isn’t the only thing that he adores.

hisoka adores your bubbly and chatty personality.

he just loves to hear you rambling about your day and the things you saw and did, he loves to listen to your voice, it’s like music to his ears.

hisoka finds it adorable whenever you ramble.

he’d smile and laugh at the hand actions you do as you tell your story.

whenever you talk, he ends up holding your hand. hisoka would run his thumb over your knuckles soothingly as you talk.

that’s when become a tomato.

hisoka likes to do that just to make you blush, he is aware of how easily flustered you can be. 

“so adorable..” you hear him murmur as a laugh escape his throat.

with puffed cheeks, you turn away and pout, “shut up, i’m not blushing. let me finish my story!”

hisoka smiles, letting you continue but not until he plants a gentle kiss on your knuckles. 

“HISOKA!” you squeal, now you were a tomato completely from your intense blushing.

“fufufufu..”

since you can be clumsy, you’d often crash into things. 

in fact, you even end up crashing into hisoka because of your clumsiness at times.

“[name]-chan~~ oh, my— are you alright?” he ends up chuckling at the fact you end up bumping into him as you walk by him holding a book.

“i’m fine.” you held the nape of your neck, “sorry!” 

“what a clumsy little fruit.” hisoka comments as he snakes an arm around you, pulling you into a quick kiss that is enough to make you flustered all over again.

ba dump.. there goes your heart once again.

Illumi Zoldyck

illumi being illumi, he can be quite serious. as you can tell by the way he acts most of the time, he is a pretty responsible individual!

he is the eldest brother in the family after all and a well-trained assassin.

illumi is highly aware of how clumsy you can be so he makes sure you’re alright every time!

he makes sure you don’t get injured or hurt by tripping on something or running into a wall by accident.

if you do get hurt, he makes sure you get bandaged right away or treated.

“please be careful next time, [name]. i don’t like it when you get hurt.” illumi tells you as he applies an ice pack to your bruised elbow. 

“sorry.” you frown. 

“it’s okay, i’m not mad. i just care for you.” he says with a blank, closed eyed smile. 

since you have a powerful nen that often breaks loose from your control, illumi would watch over you, making sure you don’t injured by your own power or injure any people.

he wouldn’t resort in using his needles to manipulate you for you to be able to control it. 

that’s because he cares for you, he loves you.

illumi doesn’t think its right for him to do such a thing to a sweet and kind person like you.

you were pretty much the only one who manages to hold his humanity together. 

you were the only person that he’d be close and affectionate with.

illumi wouldn’t dare to hold someone else’s hand, embrace someone or even kiss them. he’d kill them, it has to be you.

he didn’t actually mind of how flustered you’d get that easily.

he discreetly thinks its cute but no one knows that.

“illumi!” you’d stammer as illumi holds you close to his side as you both casually watch tv together on the couch.

illlumi would ignore you, proceeding to plant a kiss on your head. “shh.” he’d hush you.

ba dump.. there goes your heart once again.

clumsy or not, easily flustered or not. illumi loves you for who you are. 

no matter how dangerous or powerful your nen can be, even if that power can kill him. he doesn’t care.

Chrollo Lucilfer

chrollo’s darling is very fond of his affection.

you honestly but discreetly love it whenever he’s close to you as you two read books.

you feel safe with his presence and the way his touch gives you comfort and a sense of security, it just never fails to make you blush deeply.

you easily get flustered!

chrollo would tease you about it as you kisses your forehead lovingly.

“you’re a blushing mess again, dear.” he states, chuckling at the look on your face.

“that’s because you’re close.” you say in reply, arms folded as you smile and giggle. 

chrollo is highly aware of how clumsy you can be to the point that your strong and dangerous nen could somehow harm others, or worse, hurt yourself.

you makes sure you’re supervised pretty much all the time to prevent any mishaps. 

he has his phantom troupe members to aid you and accompany you for times wherein he has to leave you for a short while. 

chrollo also makes sure you are able to put your nen into practice so you’d prevent it from setting loose. 

he helps you in any way he can and he’s extremely patient when it comes to you.

“you’re doing fine, dear, keep it up. relax and let it flow through you.” he says as you let your aura surrounded you. 

“i got it!” 

chrollo is pretty responsible just like illumi.

despite his capabilities, he never dared to steal your nen from you. even if it could be a safe and right decision for a clumsy person like you who bears such power.

chrollo has faith in you and more importantly, he loves you too much to be able to do that. it isn’t right.

chrollo just loves everything about you, from your looks to your charms.

but most of all...

it was your personality! 

chrollo loved to hear you talk about the things you were so passionate about. he just adores how happy you are and how your [eye color] eyes sparkle in delight!

you may think it’s annoying but it’s not, it was never a nuisance to him. 

“am i speaking way too much?” you asked out of the blue, pausing from continuing your story. 

“no, please, continue. i’m listening, dear.” chrollo says, kissing your knuckles as he stares into your eyes. “you are not annoying, never.”

ba dump.. there goes your heart once again.

“chrollo!” you turn beet red. 

“what?” he tilts his head, laughing. “but it’s true [name].”

[bxllafanficc]

A world without heroes

Summary: Loki is imprisoned after the sudden attack on New York and with that, rest of the earth. And while you always thought you would have your lover's back, you find yourself unable to forgive this one. It's time for you to decide when enough's enough.

Pairing: Loki Laufeyson x reader

Sidenote: This was inspired by the song "A world without heroes" from KISS. I just immediately though about a moment where reader would be thrown into a deep sea of darkness after finding out the major betrayal lingering beneath many layers of Loki Laufeyson's charismatic persona.

The cold surface of the bulletproof glass is supposed to have a large impact on your wrist as the two objects collide. It's supposed to hurt but it doesn't. The glass is meant to stand and for you to give up. You're meant to lay off and calm down; meaning, stop slamming your fist into the cell like if it was going to break if you just willed your way through.

They say that if you want something enough, you possess the power to do anything. But what do you want to such an extent? More importantly, what does he want? What did he really want? Has he ever wanted any more than a throne to sit on? Or was there something more to it? Did he even know what it really meant? And if so, did he realize the consequences of his actions; not just by the billions of lives he would have destroyed, but his family, yours and especially his own as well.

A part of you wants to believe that he was under some kind of control; that he wasn't really conscious these past days. All the lives he already stole, you want to think that if he had a choice, he would've spared them. You want to believe it all so badly. You want to throw all your common sense away and just collapse into his arms. Give him a tender kiss and gaze into his eyes with lingering warmth like you used to. To forgive and forget.

But the common sense stays where it should be. You can't. Because the past days he's been imprisoned, he's confirmed every action. He doesn't even defend anything; thinks he doesn't need to. Rock-hard believing his decision was the right one to make when he really had no right.

And your eyes are no more tender and soft; but clouded and swollen, piercing through the pair of eyes on the other side of the glass. And your mouth is not tasting the sensetion of sweet lips. Only the salty wetness of your tears pooling like mad rivers.

Your chest feels heavy and about to explode. You need to scream; feel like that's the only solution to relieve the pressure. You almost feel like you're being choked. Choked on love, choked on hope, air, trust, literally everything your life has contained so far.

And the man in front of you doesn't seem to understand how your world is seemingly falling apart before him. The pure confusion in his eyes is twisting your stomach and your feel like throwing up.

"I thought I knew you."

Your sobs has quieted down. Before, you weren't able to speak very well. You just had to wait the storm out until it came rushing back ten times worse next time.

"You do, darling. You always have."

Calm as a snake and laid back. He doesn't even seem to realize that every word spoken will matter in the following moments of actions where you will decide both your fates for him.

"Did I, really? How can you look me in the eyes and say that with your disgusting pride!" You spit at the glass; aim at his feet but it doesn't seem to faze him a tiny bit. You want to bring out a reaction from him, cause maybe then, you would get some sense of honesty out of him.

"My disgusting pride? The world we're living in is disgusting and twisted. How can you even compare midgardians brutality and greediness to Asgards prosperity and beauty?"

You don't want to hear this talk again. Only a couple of years ago, you would have ignored it as just one of his endless bitter rants and thought nothing more of it, not knowing that he was actually planning to find an end to his irritation.

"(Y/n), darling, You have agreed with me on this! We agreed that humans are short minded, only good for the cause of starting a war between their own race and assassinate each other. Their petty little lives are doomed anyway."

You can't even process the amount of irony and hypocrisy seeping through his sentences. You want to scream at him. You want to hold him. You want to cry, give him a piece of your mind. But you want to fall asleep in his arms. You miss his embrace so much. Endless tiredness since he vanished, only to find he's become a monster.

Your fists attempts to break the glass once again, aiming at his perfect eyes. Those damn eyes. The same eyes you used to adore. You still do. Torn between what you want and what you should do.

"You had no right! Who are you to choose who gets to live and who doesn't?! Why should you be any different from the humans?"

Your words are no longer contained into normal conversation. Only now, Loki seems to actually start realizing the weight behind your rage.

"I did it for us, love! For you. How am I supposed to give you everything if I'm just a mere god, son of a bastard and feared of my own people. Is that the man to give you everything? Is it?"

You don't even know where the thought process of this has sparked in his mind. Never have you asked anything unusual from him, just endless trust and honesty. You have always supported him when no one else would and when nobody wanted anything to do with him. A shoulder to cry on or an ear for venting. You've heated him up with your warmth when he was feeling cold and kissed him back to health countless of times. You used to be his. In return you only asked for trust and honesty. And the funny thing? In the end, you got none of that.

"I never wanted the world, Loki! I wanted you! Couldn't you see that you were enough?"

"Why do you care about the midgardians so much? What have they done for you? Have they given you flowers when you were sad? Have they kept you company at nights where you were haunted by nightmares? Did they do any of those? Because I recall it was me who stood by you all those years!"

Why is he suddenly so angry? It makes no sense to you. When he for once speaks from his real thoughts, anger and frustration is still the feeling behind it. Even if he got his plan to destroy earth through, it wouldn't stop his burning hate.

"You speak like they are nothing but soulless objects, pawns for you to manipulate when you feel like it!"

"They need a group of unstable mutants to protect them from dangers! A bunch of heroes that they don't even really like sometimes. The heroes gets the blame of the catastrophe happening even if they are the one fighting it! Is that a society worth fighting for? Their beloved little heroes are nothing but fools."

"Everything is worth fighting for. You don't know these people, do you? And as for the people, the heroes are a beacon of hope; a sign to stand strong and come together!"

You stand quiet for a second. Your fist lowers itself against the hard surface.

"Against people like you."

You don't want to see him anymore. Heard enough. Ready to go. You've made you decision. Because how could there ever be a change to this man? When he's been hiding his true nature behind your back for so long? Did you even know who you loved? Could you even call it love?

"Did you ever love me? Or was I just being fooled this entire time?"

Concern is now displaying on him for real. Maybe he's realize where you're going; what you're about to say.

"Why would you ask that? I love you more than anything! (Y/n), please understand this! I'd do anything for you!"

"Then tell me one single moment, just one, where you've spent time with me and thought 'I could be satisfied with this. I don't need power. I'm good with what I have'."

You heart is aching with anticipation. It's almost fatal. You don't want to know but he must realize it himself before you can finish.

And you can really see how he's trying. He's trying so hard for you, he thinks. He probably thinks he's tried doing everything for you; when he really just needed not to do anything at all. And just like you guessed, there comes no words. He knows you'll see if he's lying and knows you're right. But you don't ever think he will ever regret his attack for the right reasons. Nor for you, to get you back. No, you'll never accept that.

"I can't live like this, Loki. Can't you see you're breaking my heart?"

"I didn't mean to-"

"No. You didn't mean to do it, right? That's what you're gonna say... But I've heard enough. You have made a decision. And it's about time that I make mine as well."

The realization hits him almost instantly. And all the traces of his usually calm manner were gone in an instant. He's no longer standing with hands clasped behind his back. But they're clawing and pawning at the glass keeping the two of you apart. Loneliness is the one fatal emotion he hasn't dared himself to feel for years with you by his side. But now when it all might be taken away from him in a matter of seconds? How is he supposed to react?

He's begging, pleading, punching and screaming. Sobbing and begging even more. His silvertounge can't save him now. Nothing can save him now from the unruly fate. A path he himself had laid out beneath his feet.

"Please, (Y/n) I love you! I don't want to be here alone!"

...

"Please... It's cold and dark. I can't breathe without your warmth! Just.. Please!"

You can't stand to hear any more. His pleading is too much and you've stayed enough.

Your heart feels like it's being torn in half by your own hands as you turn around, the cold of your back hitting him in the deepest depths of his despair. And it sets him off.

You're going to leave him. The only purely good thing in his life is going to leave him. Where is he going to get his hugs? It doesn't matter because they won't be from you. Is he even going to remember your face when time has passed? Will he even remember your laugh, smile or your goofy little moments together? Will you find somebody else? Forget about him and move on.

Loki doesn't want you to move on; doesn't want you to move at all. He's ready to do whatever it takes to get you to stay.

And he would, if there wasn't a thick wall between you, keeping him from you no matter how hard he slammed it or how loudly he screamed at you.

Pleading became despair and despair led to threats; the only solution left to try.

He knew it was wrong. Wrong to threaten a loved one, especially you. But he would never accept his fate knowing that he hadn't tried anything in his power to make the only thing left for him to love slip past his hands.

But a tiny part of him knows that you won't hear him. Won't listen to him like those late summer nights under the moon on a cozy blanket, you tightly wrapped into his embrace with a content smile on your face.

Or the time when a sudden attack of sorrow and anxiety hit him in the middle of the night and you held him close to your chest while whispering sweet assurances for him to fall asleep to.

You had been his anchor to the real world.

You were the only thing to keep him sane enough.

But it wasn't enough in the end.

You had been his hero.

But not even a hero could save someone's world sometimes.

Especially when he was the one ruining it.

His love.

(Y/n)

[awesamblr]

PART TWO OF GHOSTBUR!!! Since you seemed to like the first one! :D

They all pause for a moment to take in what they just heard.

Wilbur...? Doesn't remember them...?

Tommy is the first one to speak up, sounding more hurt and confused with just an edge of anger to the words. "We...We're your family, Wilbur!! Wil- ...Wil are you-" Tommy doesn't want to believe that Wilbur doesn't remember them, he doesn't want that... "Wil, you better not be fucking with us-" he starts again, sounding more angry, fresh tears beginning to fall. "Cause if you are, I swear to god-"

And he stops as he finds a hand on his shoulder. Tommy turns and finds Techno.

"Tommy...he doesn't remember us Tommy..."

Wilbur shifts around, floating around slightly and awkwardly. "Y-you all seem to care a whole lot..." his hand moves to his chest. "I can't remember how I died...I can hardly remember anything...I'm so sorry if you knew me well..."

Tommy gets angry again- calling it anger is a disservice to the emotional turmoil, he was upset and scared and happy and so so sad- and Techno gets ready to hold him back again when another voice interrupts them.

"Knew you...?" It was Phil... "Knew you??" He pulled up his hanging head and tears ran freely. "Hell, Wilbur- I RAISED YOU!! I know you better than I know myself!! Wilbur, don't you recognize me? Recognize us?" He takes a step toward Wil and so much pain and hurt reflects in Phil's eyes- it hurt to look at them. "Wilbur we're your family! Those are your brothers...!! And I'm-" he remembers the explosion, the pleading of his son- kill me, kill me, please kill me- and takes a shattered breath. "And I'm your father."

Wilbur looks around at the broken family.

A boy who looks as if he once held his entire world in his hands, only to have it melt through his fingers and spill to the floor.

A man who looks like chaos incarnate, now heavy with guilt and shame, a horrible tiredness running through him endlessly.

A boy who looks as though he'd been through hell and back with a smile on his face, still trying to be happy for others around him.

A man who looks as though he had the world. As though he had absolutely everything. And now his everything was gone.

And Wilbur speaks. "Was..." he gulps in a breath at the teary eyes, almost not wanting to know the answer to the question on his tongue. "Was I a good brother?"

Memories flood the minds of the family.

Tommy recalls times of when him and Wilbur would make huge pillow forts when they were younger and of how whenever Tommy was upset, Wil would come up behind him and lay himself over his shoulders in a lazy gesture- not quite a hug, but something that felt the same.

Tommy also remembered Wilbur, eyes alive with insanity and agressive cruelty. The Wilbur that would scream at Tommy and pound his fist against the wall and tell Tommy that he was hopeless.

Techno remembers times in his life where him and Wilbur would sneak out of the house together to go hunt mobs- Wilbur never really wanted to be there, but Techno would never have gone without him. He remembered how when Techno would lock himself in his room and quietly panic, only to hear the calm strummings of a guitar from the other side of the door until Techno calmed down.

Techno also remembered the Wilbur that wanted to blow up Manburg, that wanted Techno's help in it's destruction. The Wilbur that craved chaos and hurt and pain. The Wilbur he had helped to destroy good.

Tubbo recalls times after he was adopted into the family, times where he would struggle with reading and writing and Wilbur would silently walk over and help him. He remembers times when he feels lost and Wilbur would pass by him humming a tune Tubbo would recognize, and soon the two of them would be singing loudly in the livingroom and laugh when Phil came down and yelled at them.

Tubbo also remembered Wilbur, actions shaky and plagued as he spouted on and on about Manburg and L'manburg and would sing stuttering and manic lyrics to a half-finished song and scribling them to a wall of his insanity.

Phil remembered Wilbur, the moment he came into Phil's life, the moments that he would have to wrangle the pure-hearted chaos of the boy with eyes that sparkled with neverending wonder and curiosity and passion. He remembered moments when Wilbur would begin to cry or leave the house telling the others he was "going for a walk" when they all knew he would break down the moment the house left his sight- he remembered the way he once cried for an injured bird when Phil told him the animal wouldn't make it, and remembered the way that Phil wasted a health potion on the little bird that night, just to see him smile again.

And Phil remembered the Wilbur in the control room. His eyes, his voice, his actions- a shattered and twisted version of what Phil had known him to be. The way his voice cracked and the way his eyes were alive with pain and madness and the way he fell to his knees as the home he had built was blown to bits. Phil remembered the way that on his knees still, Wilbur grappled onto Phil's coat and begged him over and over to end him, so much pain and hurt and trapped craze in his voice it shattered Phil.

"Was I a good brother?"

They were silent.

And then a small word from a small boy- a boy now president of a ruined land. "You were the best big brother anyone could ask for, Wilbur." They looked to Tubbo, who hadn't spoken a word the entire time. His eyes still dripped tears, but he had the most wonderful smile on his face. "You were the coolest big brother in the world. Why do you think we're so happy to see you again?" He gave a wet laugh. "Hell, you were amazing! Did you know that you used to help me with my english homework cause I couldn't read? A-and you would sing songs with me when I was sad!! You were the kindest brother a man could ask for."

"For real, Big Man!!" It was Tommy's turn to speak as he tried fruitlessly to dry his eyes. "You don't remember, but you and me made the most massive forts and we would hide there for hours and scare Technoblade!" Tommy laughed fondly. "I remember one time Techno was carrying a stick and hit me on the head when i scared him. You sat down with me and told me that I was okay and that we were gonna whack Techno with a billion sticks when I felt better."

"You..." Techno was hesitant for only a fraction of a second. "You used to help me sneak out of the house and we'd do all sorts of crazy things. You always said you were watching after me to make sure i never got hurt." He gave an amused chuckle at the memories. "You would play guitar in the hallway when i was upset, no matter what time it was. You got in trouble a lot for that, but you never stopped."

"Wilbur..." They turned to Phil as he adressed his son. Phil remembered and remembered and couldn't stop remembering and everything he remembered was good and every single memory was filled with thoughts of Wilbur- that's my son!- even in his last moments, and even the moments after when Phil had known he was long gone but held him closely anyway, he remembered the way he felt. Wilbur had never stopped being his son, Phil had never once stopped loving him. "Are you proud of me, Phil?" And the blonde man let more tears roll down his cheeks.

Phil tugged the ghost man into his arms and held on as if he ever let go, Wilbur really would disappear and be gone forever. "I'm so proud of you, Wilbur..." He spoke into the ghostial yellow sweater his son wore. "You were and still are the best son a man could ask for...i know you forgot that. But you know now and that's all that matters. I'm sorry i wasn't a better father, but know that i am so proud of you...so so proud, Wilbur..."

And Wilbur hugs him back.

It's hesitant, but it's there.

And Phil's other sons will know that as Wilbur embraced his father, tears rolled down his face in an unstoppable flow of emotion that Wilbur himself didn't understand completely, but his brothers did.

Wilbur doesn't know why he was crying. He didn't remember these people. But their emotions and connections were so so strong he felt the hints of distant memories flood him.

Someone giggling as they stacked things together.

Someone singing loudly with him as they danced around a room.

Someone chatting and joking with him under the stars.

Someone there, always always there. They never left...and they loved him so much.

"So..." Wilbur tried to keep his voice even, but found he could not. "I was a good brother?"

He was flooded with more arms- the embrace of his siblings, all shouting and telling him he was wonderful.

Tubbo...he remembered the name and he felt emotions attached to the name and the face, but he couldn't remember why.

Tommy...he could recall emotions attached to that name and was flooded with involuntary emotions when he looked at his blue eyes.

Techno...he could recall the name like an old friend and knew immediately that he was a comrade- a friend- a brother? He knew that name but couldn't understand why.

And Phil...he knew Phil. The memories were so blocked and so fuzzy and he could only just make out a smiling face, but it was Phil. He didn't know why and he didn't know how but he loved that name.

He loved all their names, and was overcome with inexplicable emotions when he saw them.

"...Dad...?" Wilbur finally let the word fall from his lips.

Phil held him closer.

"You were the best son I could have ever asked for..."

(I can keep the story going if you want! I really like drabbling this it's so much fun lol! But for now this is a good stopping place cause the ask is hella long.)

MANNNN I AM IN L O V E. THE WAY YOU RIGHT IS SO NICE AND FLOWY AND IT ALL JUST WORKS SO OERFECTLY TOGETHER! AND THE PARALLELS??? MMMMMMM

PLEASE KEEP GOING IF YOU WANT IM BEGGING