#the demon in my brain is like ‘THIS IS TOO SUDDEN!!! YOURE FAKING!!! YOURE LYING!!!!!!’

[ohsweetflips]

current predicament im facing is that i am vaguely unhappy/dissatisfied with how i Am Presented or Perceived by people but i also don’t necessarily want to change how i present Myself too much bc i like my style, i just don’t like the. well. *hand waves*

[127-mile]

Let’s pretend we’re in love.

Pairing: Doyoung x gender neutral reader.

Genre: Fake dating, unrequited love, bff to strangers | Angst.

Warnings: strong language.

Plot: Doyoung is beautiful, he is also kind, attentive, affectionate, smart and funny. He is charismatic, and well-spoken. His voice could be mistaken with that of an angel, whether he is speaking, or singing. Doyoung is everyone's dream, the one person you would never hesitate to introduce to your parent. Doyoung is also...mean. Doyoung has the face and the voice of an angel, in the body of a demon.

Doyoung tells his mother he is dating you after lying about his relationship. Doyoung knows about your feelings, but he doesn’t care.

Word count: +4.2k.

A/n: this is part of the Mad about the boy collab hosted by @slightlymore​.

Doyoung is beautiful, he is also kind, attentive, affectionate, smart and funny. He is charismatic, and well-spoken. His voice could be mistaken with that one of an angel, whether he is speaking, or singing. Doyoung is everyone's dream, the one person you would never hesitate to introduce to your parents. Doyoung is also..

"Y/n are you listening to me?" you are pulled away from your thoughts when Doyoung nudges you. He has been talking for over five minutes now, but all you could think about was how perfect he is. Yes, you saw his lips move, but you did not hear a sound that come out of his mouth. Now that you think about it, Doyoung does have pretty lips, and you wonder how it would feel to kiss him.

"Oh, what is wrong with you today?" he stops and grabs your wrist when you are about to run into a pole. "Are you alright? Are you sick? Do you need me to drive you back home? I can call my parents, and tell them I'll be late, it's fine. You look awfully lost today." you have a long sigh, why is he like this, always so caring.

"I'm fine Doyoung, don't worry about me, I guess I'm just a bit tired." you answer, and he does not look convinced but he shrugs. "Are you sure? My parents will not be mad if you decide to skip dinner." you shake your head as you start walking again, pulling Doyoung with you as he was still holding your wrist. "It's fine. What were you saying?"

"I was talking about my parents, and the reason they invited us." well, technically, they invited Doyoung to eat with them, but Doyoung answered one of your calls, and upon hearing your name, his parents decided to invite you too. A free meal in a nice restaurant is always pleasant, so you had to say yes. Maybe you shouldn't have, with how hard it is for you to focus on anything else than Doyoung's face.

"This weekend is the weekend where the whole family gets together in our grandparents' country house. I told them I would not come because of work, so they are going to try and convince me to join them." this time, you are the one stopping in your tracks. "If you knew what they were going to talk about, why did pretty much beg me to come? I do not want to be in the middle of an argument with your parents."

You met Doyoung when him and his family moved in the neighoroud, you were still young, so you have known each other for a very long time, and he got into the habit of having you by his side during arguments, because you are what he calls a neutral zone, or whatever is reasoning is. "Oh come on, you know they can't refuse me anything when you are here!"

"Doyoung, you are 25 year old! You should know how to settle an argument with your parents, you should know how to make them listen to you and accept whatever you have to say." he tilts his head to the side, and his eyes meet yours. It's enough for your heart to skip a beat, or two. Stupid heart. "Please?"

"Why don't you want to go by the way? The house is really cool, there is a lake, and your family is really sweet. Don't you miss them?" he looks around, and he notices how close he is from the restaurant. If he tries hard enough, he is pretty sure he can see his parents near a bay window, laughing together. "Because, I may have told my mother I had a partner, and she expects me to bring them."

"You are a dumbass, Kim Doyoung." you say in a sigh. "Why would you tell her that? If you do not have time to brush your hair, you definitely do not have time to date someone." he looks offended, but then he remembers the mess on his head, and he decides to stay quiet on the subject. "I don't know! My mom's been on my back about finding someone for months now, I guess I got tired of hearing her and I decided to lie."

"Why don't you find someone? Don't you have a cute coworker you wanted to ask on a date once? Ask them to play your partner." you hate how bright his smile becomes when you mention said coworker. You try not to think about what they have, that you do not have. This is not the time to mope. You'll cry about it later. "That's a great idea! You are the best."

Yes, yes, you are.

Doyoung crosses the road, and he pushes open the door to the restaurant. "After you." he says, and you step inside, smiling at the sudden warmth that invades your body. "Good evening, do you have a reservation?" the young man asks, and Doyoung nods. "My parents are waiting for us, they made a reservation under the name of Kim."

"Yes!" he exclaims, and he walks you to the table. The couple stands up when they see you, and you let Doyoung's mother embrace you for a second. "Y/n, it's been a while, how are you doing sweetheart?" she asks, and you sit down in front of her. "I am doing just fine, how are you?"

"Same old, same old." she starts, head tilted to the side. "we are trying to organize the family weekend, and as usual, it's stressful." you understand. You participated in a few of these gathering, and you know how stressfull everything is. You never regretted anything more than the time you offered to help.

"Yes, Doyoung told me, I'm sure it's going to be amazing, and you'll have a wonderful time with your family." the woman smiles warmly, and she puts her hand on Doyoung's. "Tell me baby, did you ask your partner to come with you?" you nibble on your lower lip, you are excited to hear his arguments.

"Mom, I told you, I have too much work, I can't come." she shakes her head, and you share a look with his father. He knows he is lying, but he keeps his mouth shut, he knows better than to intervene. "Come on Doyoung, don't be silly, I'm sure whatever you have to do can wait for the weekend to be over."

Before he can open his mouth, she raises her hand to shut him up. "I have an idea. Why don't you take your work with you, and I'll give you a couple of hours to work in your grandfather's office, how does that sound?" Doyoung's mother is tenacious, she knows what she wants, and she is ready to do everything in order to get it.

"You know, my darling, that I'm not getting younger by the day, and my dream is to meet the person who makes you so so happy." oh, she went there, you think. Doyoung looks at you, and you smirk, you are not going to help him. "I have something to tell you first."

"I'm listening." but before Doyoung can say anything, the waitress gives you the menu, and comes back to take the orders. And when she leaves, Doyoung's mother prompts him to speak. "Go on, my love, is something wrong?"

"Everything is fine, mother." he plays with his fingers, and you wonder what he is going to say. His mouth opens, and closes for a second, you wonder if he said anything, or if you blacked out because of what he said. All you hear is his mother squeal with delight, and when you look up, she is absolutely beaming.

"Oh my god! I told you it would happen eventually!" she says, hitting her husband on the shoulder. "You did say that." he mumbles, rubbing the aching spot. "I am so happy! And the family loves you, they are going to be thrilled to hear that!"

The rest of the dinner is a blur, you hear and say things, but your brain can't quite process whatever is happening. You must look odd to the Kim's eyes, but you can't even find it in yourself to care.

"See you on Saturday sweetheart." Doyoung's mother says, cupping your cheeks to kiss your forehead. "Yes, Saturday."

When the car disappears from your sight, you turn on your heels to face Doyoung. At least he has the decency to look ashamed, and he doesn't say anything when you hit him in the chest. "What the fuck, Doyoung?" you yell, and he knows people are looking at the scene, even if it's already dark outside.

"I'm sorry, I panicked." he answers, and you shake your head. "Couldn't you admit that you lied, instead of luring me into your lies without asking first!" he takes your hand, and he sighs. "I know, I know. But you were there, and my mom was so excited, I don't know what happened. And look how happy she was when I said it."

"Imagine how sad she is going to be when she'll learn it was a lie, Doyoung!" he knows he should have thought before opening his mouth in the restaurant, but it was his only solution, or so you thought. "She doesn't have to know it was a lit, we can just... I don't know, break up?"

This is a bad idea, you think. For you, who have been madly in love with Doyoung ever since you were kids, it's going to hurt. Because you know Doyoung does not reciprocate your feelings, and never will, and he will play the perfect boyfriend you wish you had.

The break up is going to hurt like a bitch, even if it's fake, and yet, you open your mouth. "We are breaking up at the end of the weekend."

"We need to get the details right, when did we become official?"

Doyoung sits on the edge of the bed as you put your clothes in the dresser. "I don't know Doyoung. You are the one who brought me into this mess, so you should be the one thinking about it." he mumbles something you don't understand, and you turn on your heels to face him. "You are telling me that you did not think about the details at all?"

You did think about everything, of course you did. Not because you were excited about this situation, but because it is something you thought about a lot these past few years.

"I was busy!" he exclaims, and you sigh. "If you want it to be believable, you need to think. Right now. Because your family will be there in a few minutes." you are glad you arrived before everything else, it gives you the time to settle down, and to think about the things you could have talked about in the car.

"We can't tell them it's been a few months, because my mom will bet mad that I did not tell her sooner. So maybe two or three weeks?" you nod. "Yeah, okay. Who confessed?" Doyoung seems to think about it, and when he opens his mouth to answer, you wish you never asked the question. "You, you did it. It what you would have done if it really happened, uh?"

You do not say anything, you do not like the way he said it, like he knows something. He probably does to be honest, you are not the best at hiding your feelings.

"Kids, come say hello!" saved by the bells.

You get out of your bedroom, and you go down the stairs. A few of Doyoung's cousins just entered the house, and they smile when they see you both. "Oh, Y/n, I didn't know you would be here!" Jungwoo says and he puts you into a bone-crushing hug. "Yeah, last minute decision." you answer.

You greet the other members of the family, and before you can understand what is happening, someone grabs your hand to pull you into the living room. "Guys, you all know Y/n, right? Well, I would like to officially introduce Y/n as my partner!"

You try not to look uncomfortable when they all cooe, but you can't smile either. Doyoung is just dropping the bomb, when you thought he would tell the news to some members of the family if they ever asked about his love life. Well, you agreed to be here, so you have to go with the flow. Or rather with Doyoung's decisions.

"I never thought I would see the day where you would finally confess your feelings for our dear cousin." Jungwoo says, and you laugh but god do you want to punch him square in the face. He is the only one in the family to know about your true feelings, so with the little announcement, he feels allowed to say everything he knows.

"Yes, I was wondering if Y/n was ever going to do it. About time." Doyoung answers, and you roll your eyes, but fortunately, his mother calls everyone in the garden. She wants to celebrate the beginning of what she thinks will be a memorable weekend.

"They are gone, you can let go of my hand." you mumble, and he shakes his head. "We have to play the perfect little couple, so might as well do it fully." what is the point of playing when no one is around to see you, if not play with your heart. "You always wanted it, so don't be like that. Come on, let's not make them wait."

He leads you to the garden, and when he finally lets go of your hand to grab two glasses of wine, you feel yourself breathing again. Of course, you spent the last couple of days thinking about the weekend, and how it would turn out, but you thought it would be nice, you know, to be closer to your long-time crush, but no, it's unberable and it's been less than an hour.

"I would like to thank everyone for making the trip for the weekend, I am really glad to see you all, because I have to be honest with you, this year was not easy, and I missed each and every one of you. I am also really grateful to have Y/n with us, I always knew Y/n would be the one to make our sweet boy happy."

Doyoung looks proud, and he is beaming under the attention when you want nothing more than to burry yourself in the ground. "Thank you for accepting me." you say when you hear nothing but silence and feel way too many pairs of eyes on you. "Of course, my love. You were always part of the family, so it is even more normal to have you here with us today."

That's sweet, but what is not is the way Doyoung chuckles under his breath.

"Oh, here you are!" Jungwoo sits down next to you on the couch, and he puts his head on your shoulder. "I've been looking for you everywhere. You know the grandfather's office is off limit?" you shrug, eyes still closed. "I don't care, I needed some alone time."

Jungwoo straightens up, and he does what he does best, he pouts. "What's going on? Are you not happy to be here with us?" you heave a long sigh, opening your eyes to look at him. "I am. I'm always happy to see all of you, especially you Woo, but I don't know. I guess it's overwhelming this time."

"I bet it is. Everyone is all over you, asking you questions. I would dip too if I were you." he answers, and you stay quiet for a couple of minutes. "You and Doyoung, it's an hoax right?" you do not know if you like or hate the fact that Jungwoo is always quick to catch on. "It's that obvious?"

"Not really," he starts, standing up to stretch his long legs. "but you've been in love with him for ever, so seeing you here, when you should be glued to him is weird." that's definitely what you would be doing if Doyoung was not acting so.. you do not even know how to describe it. "I don't know Woo, Doyoung has been acting weird since we arrived."

"What do you mean?" you take the time to think about it, because Jungwoo is still Doyoung's cousin, and you do not want to upset him. "He is the one who told his parents that we were dating, without asking me first, and yet, he is acting like an asshole."

"He throws little comments about my feelings, my real feelings, each chance he gets, and every time, he has that nasty smile on his face." you explain, and Jungwoo hums. "I know it's been only a few hours, and he is probably acting out of nervousness, but it's like.. did he just trick me into coming here just to humiliate me in front of everyone?"

You expect Jungwoo to tell you that you are wrong, that you are imagining everything, but no. "I would not be surprise, to be honest with you." you narrow your eyes, and you don't know what to expect now. "We went on vacation last year, remember? And there, he met this person. It was obvious that they caught feelings for him, and he just played with them."

"He is not stupid, and he understood pretty quickly, but instead of being flattered or to let them down gently, he just decided to be an asshole about it." if Doyoung was not acting like that today, you would never have believed a word of what he said. This is not the Doyoung you know. "But why would he do that? He is not like that on the daily."

"Everyone things he is perfect, but I guess perfection does not extist, and he is the proof." you don't really know how to feel right now. You want to leave, because you are mad. You are mad at yourself, and you are mad at him. "But why me? I'm here to help him, and I'm his best friend, not some kind of summer fling. I never did anything to wrong him or anything, I don't understand."

"I wish I knew Y/n." he answers, putting his hand on your shoulder. "I know how much you love him, and I am sorry he is playing with you." you sigh, you are at loss for words right now. You want to leave but you can't, not this early. Maybe you can find an excuse to leave? No, you can't. Doyoung is the one who drove you here.

"Keep me from hurting him if he decides to act up again today." you say, and Jungwoo nods with a smile. "You know, I am not that strong, so if I can't hold you for long enough, and that you end up actually hurting him, I'm sorry." he winds, and he opens the door to let your out first.

"Well, that was a nice day!" Doyoung says as he lets himself fall on the bed. You have to move your arm to avoid it being stuck under his body. "Good for you." you answer, and he turns on his side to look at you, frowning. "Is something wrong?"

"Are you really asking me that?" you don't know if you should tell him everything you have in mind, or keep quiet and wait until you leave, but you are not sure you can hold for another day. All you know is that you don't want to snap in front of the entire family.

"I have a question, why are you such an asshole with me?" he straightens up, back against the bedframe and he crosses his arms against his chest. "What are you talking about? Wa barely talked today!" you scoff. "And for a reason. Every time we talked, you just made me look like an idiot."

"Why are you doing this? What was the point of asking me to come, if you were planning on being mean?" he bites the inside of his cheek. If you try to remain calm, it seems hard for him too. He has a lot to say, but everyone is asleep, and he knows how quick he gets angry, and he doesn't want anyone to eavesdrop.

"So we are really doing this, uh?" you don't know what he is referring to, but you nod either way. "I'm tired Y/n. I'm tired of you being in love with me." well, that's not what you were expecting, but you are not surprised, if this taught you anything is that you can't expect anything when it comes to Doyoung anymore.

"Hear me out. I know you love me, I always knew, and the attention is nice, but I never mentionned it because you are my best friend, and I never wanted our relationship to change. But I met someone." oh.

"It's my coworker, the one I wanted to ask of a date. Well, I did, last year, and we've been dating ever since. But they can't stand the way you look at me, and it weight a lot on our relationship." you shake your head. "Then why did you bring me? Why didn't you introduce them to your parents instead?"

"How do I say that.. I needed a reason for you to hate me. Not as your friend, but as a potential lover. I needed something to calm your feelings, because as much as I love you, as a friend, my relationship with them is way more important." it feels like someone is squeezing your heart, and you wouldn't be surprised if it came out of your ribcage, in pieces.

"They hate how you look at me, and I understand, I am to the point where I hate it too." you open your eyes wide, and you look up. You refuse to cry. Not in front of Doyoung, he does not deserve it. "So your only option was to break my heart, in front of your entire family? You could have told me the truth, I would have understood you know, I might be in love with you, but I am not stupid!"

"You say you love me as a friend, and yet, you are doing this. You decided to play with my heart to hurt me. And for what?" your voice is shaking, and it sounds a lot like a sob that escapes your pressed lips. "I'm sorry." he whispers, and you laugh as you get out of bed.

"You are not sorry, Doyoung. This is not your first time doing something like this. Is this what gets you going? Breaking people's hearts? Are you planning on doing the same with your current partner?" he shakes his head, and of course, he would never do something like that. Sweet sweet Doyoung.

"You know what? You don't have to worry about me looking at you some type of way, because starting from tomorrow, you will not have to see me again. It'll be so much easier for you." you grab your suitcase, and you stuff your clothes inside. "What are you doing?" Doyoung stands up and he follows you every move.

"I'm going to sleep on the couch, and I'll go home first thing in the morning. Don't worry about driving me back, you can stay here, enjoy and explain to your mother why she will never see me again. Maybe you should also tell her why her son is such a fucking asshole, I'm sure she's going to love it."

"Come on, don't be like that." he says in a sigh, and you open the bedroom door. "Don't be like what? Don't be like a fucking human being with feelings? Well I'm sorry, but I am!" if the family was not around you, you would have sloed the door hard enough for the sound to echoes against the walls, but instead, you close it softly.

Doyoung is beautiful, he is also kind, attentive, affectionate, smart and funny. He is charismatic, and well-spoken. His voice could be mistaken with that of an angel, whether he is speaking or singing. Doyoung is everyone's dream, the one person you would never hesitate to introduce to your parents. Doyoung is also mean.

Doyoung has the face and the voice of an angel, in the body of a demon.

So yes, you are mad about the boy, but you are also mad about yourself.

[hannie-dul-set]

who in svt would agree to platonically kiss you

maybe you're a writer and would want to know how it feels to have peppered swipes of love gently sprinkling your face for the piece you're trying to write. or maybe you're trying to fake having a boyfriend to get your ex off your ass. or maybe you're just weird and/or read too much fanfiction and hope for your own 100k f2l love story with your best friend. whatever your dumb reason is, here's a list of who will agree, who will smack you upside in the face, and who will permanently delete you from his contacts!! let's find out!!

seungcheol: dude he'd agree to (platonically) marry you in order to get your nosy relatives off your ass for being single for so long. just give him a signal and he'd be ready to make out in the middle of a bunch of greasy bodies in a club just to get some weirdo to fuck off because duh?? that's what friends do?? right??? | rating: 9/10 minus one point simply because he'd probably fall in love with you and that would ruin the platonic bit.

jeonghan: "about time you gave in, babe ;))" a little shit. would tease you relentlessly about your apparent, subconscious desire to punch him for him. angel is all talk though, because once you're already inches away from him, he'd panic and chicken out because holy fuck ahaha this shouldn't happen. pulls away from you last minute. would tell you your breath stank of cilantro as a cover up | rating: 3/10 he's a fucking loser don't even try.

joshua: he'd laugh, crinkling his nose and say wow that would be wild haha, but proceed to ignore you. he may have turned into the bare-armed, testosterone monster that he is now, but joshua still wouldn't want to kiss anyone he isn't in a relationship with. that's what his mother taught him and he isn't gonna disobey her cause of you. maybe try asking him out first <33 | rating: 1/10 the one is there because wow you might get him as your boyfriend.

junhui: sorry, but jun would ask you first. you'd be sitting in his living room, watching netflix at god knows what the fuck am and he'd be like "hey. movie's boring. wanna make out?" and you'd be like sure until all of a sudden oops you're not only platonically kissing anymore wow what a slip up | rating: 10/10 you're both a matchmade in horny heaven.

soonyoung: look. soonyoung is wild. soon is down for anything. soonie will probably stab himself with a fork just because you told him he can't. but that's the thing— he'd only do it if it was a challenge. ask him to kiss you because you've been lying to your friends that you had a boyfriend and they wanted evidence? his cheeks will start flaring. tell him "oh i that's fine. i knew you'd be too much of a pussy to agree" then damn you've just unleashed the tiger | rating: 6/10 because of the extra effort you have to put in.

wonwoo: jeon is a simple man. he is a classy man. a simple "no" without even looking at your direction is the only thing you're getting from him. you'd whine, telling him please— i wanna write this story for one of my classes perfectly and the main guy is a nerd and you're the only loser i know. he'd close the book he was reading, leaning into your face ever so slowly, right before smacking the fucking book on your head because wow. the audacity of you | rating: 0/10 but 10/10 if you wanna come back to your senses.

jihoon: what the fuck why would you even consider asking him you evil monster you just wanna watch jihoon shrivel up like a dried grape painted in a fresh coat of red | rating: invalid. error. don't even try unless you want to get guitar smacked when he finally recovers from shock.

minghao: if you were a stranger, yes he'd agree. but you're not. you're his friend and he knows about your gross habits and that's just a no for him like ew. unless you're desperate for whatever the fuck reason. only if you agree to be his poor PA during his monthly, ig outfit photoshoot this weekend and you start to wonder if this is really worth carrying three bags of outfits, one for his accessories, and the amount of muscle pain? thought so | rating: 4/10 if you're crazy and actually go through with it because if he's gonna do it, he's gonna do it right.

mingyu: he'd agree. mingyu is a sweetheart of course he would. the only drawback is that he'd be a huge fucking mess and be like "kiss??? kiss me?? you want?? ahaha o-oh yeah sure totally i'd love to ki— i mEAN since u asked haha" his brain would start whirring like a broken microwave when you do and start thinking is this okay?? do friends do this?? oh my god?? | rating: 7/10 but i doubt he'd even be able to look at you in the eye after this lmao. you got to kiss him but at what cost ://

seokmin: "omg!! sure!!! let's kiss :D" okay, maybe you suggested it because you're a demon and you wanted to see him flustered but oops, seokmin is actually down for it because he is so full of love and would kiss you again if you asked. you're like???? wait i didn't plan it this way, seokmin i— OOPS he already gave you a tiny smooch. he's smiling, asking you if you want another one and smoke is literally emitting from your head rip | rating: 8/10 your brain is fried but at least he's cute.

seungkwan: "excuse me?? you want to kiss me?? know your place, loser" kwan isn't gonna tolerate this kind of troglodytic behavior. you haven't even asked permission from his parents, court him with a million bouquets, chocolates, and vitamins and you're expecting him to agree to kiss you?? wow the sheer shamelessness of some people smh | rating: 2/10 tiny chance that he'd agree if you tell him it was for attention.

vernon: he didn't hear you the first time. second time. wait is this the fifth? until you're literally up at his face asking him for a smooch because you wanted your roommate to believe you actually went out to get laid instead of playing animal crossing at vernon's place because the vibe of his room matched the cozy atmosphere. she would start clowning you if she found out. poor vernon is surprised. frozen. but he manages to stammer out a "sure" and you've already left but vernon was still thinking of you | rating: 6/10 bcs oops haha didn't mean for it to turn angsty

chan: would say yes without giving it much thought until he realized what you were doing and he's like oh shit you were actually serious okay we're doing this. but wait we're in public y/n what the fuck. and you're like shut the fuck up the guy that's been bothering me is here and he's like oh okay. would be embarrassed for the next few days but let's say you got into a petty argument and chan would be like "ooh you wanna kiss me so bad" and you're like "fuck no" and he'd say "you already did" and you're like god damn it | rating: 7/10 because he's gonna use it against you lol.

[embrassemoi]

Surrounded by The Moon and Stars • 08

Pairings: Sirius Black x [F]Reader, Remus Lupin x [F]Reader Content: Language, possible errors Author’s notes: Had a hard time with this one. 

Masterlist: Previous Chapter | Next Chapter

Chapter 8: Master Plan

❉───────•~❉•᯽•❉~•───────❉

Surgeons always have a plan, that’s what Y/N picked up from her mother over the years. They knew what scalpel they needed, where to cut or clamp down. But even with their carefully crafted plans, there are unexpected things bound to arise that we don’t originally consider.

“Stop moving.”

Because that was not a part of her plan. So she began to formulate a new one:

a) Surely if she were to scream now, it would alert professor McGonagall. She would come rushing to help and free her.

b) But if she stepped on the person's shoe while screaming, it would distract them just long enough for her to have a head start. The pain would be so sudden that they would drop their arms and she could run. If she focused hard enough too, she could channel magic around her. Besides, if all else fails, McGonagall would still be there.

Option b) sounded like a great plan.

Now that her attacker's hand was drawn back, Y/N opened her mouth until she promptly shut it again. In the dark, she vaguely makes out a tall figure coming into view, a familiar mop of fawn-like hair appearing from behind her.

It was Remus.

With his presence, her body instantly relaxes. Her shoulders slump as tension and fear slowly dissolve. Remus tosses her a glance, shooting a gentle smile before his face darkens as he nods. He brings a finger to his lips, warning them to not interrupt.

To her delight, Y/N feels the person’s grip loosen even more, however, their arms were still caged and secured snuggly. Her heart slowed, becoming calmer as her brain moved from the idea of self-defence to confusion.

McGonagall finally enters the main corridor. From where they stood, her back faced them as she peered around the darkness, gripping the base of her candelabra. It glowed brightly, lighting up the surrounding area.

This was the only time Y/N had seen her professor after official school hours. Her outfit was mismatched; a soft pyjama set, with her school robes and heels on. She swore she had a sleeping mask hanging around her neck. Had pure adrenaline not been coursing through her veins, she would have snorted.

Remus uses this to his advantage as he shuffles his way towards McGonagall. He brushes off the non-existent dust from his suit before he reaches into his pocket, placing a shiny pin on the breast pocket. He then coughs, gaining her attention.

Startled, McGonagall wheeled her head, “Mr. Lupin! What are you doing here?”

He puts his hands in the pocket of his suit cooly. “Good evening professor. I’m doing my rounds. I actually just came from Slughorn's party a while ago.” He says, gesturing to his unusual patrol outfit.

McGonagall remains silent, choosing to take in his appearance. Y/N can almost see the confusion written on her face. She peers sternly over her glasses to look at Remus. If he was nervous, he hid it well because his expression managed to stay unchanged and there was no trace of a lie. Her eyes scan him one last time before speaking, “You’re not supposed to be on rounds tonight.”

“I switched places last minute with another prefect. They weren’t feeling well.” Remus quickly adds on, “— you might know them? Calwald; sixth year Slytherin.”

“Ah, yes… I heard footsteps coming from here. Did you see anyone?”

Remus looks like he’s thinking quickly. “Yeah, just a first year Slytherin. I escorted them to their common room.”

Professor McGonagall’s unnerving gaze even made Y/N shudder. She tuts, her head drops in a small nod. She stands tall, “Very well then, goodnight Remus.”  

“Goodnight, Professor.”

The soft clicks of her heels started up again. McGonagall heads in the opposite direction of the Slytherin common room while Remus pretends to walk away before pressing himself against a wall, camouflaging with the shadows in case their teacher were to look back. The echoing became quieter until only a soft, almost inaudible clicking came from the distance. The glow from her candles was gone and darkness surrounded them again.

Y/N was made acutely aware of the other person’s hold around her waist once it slackens, pulling away from her. The heavy fabric is dragged off her body before she turns over to her attacker.

“Sirius?”

She jerks away as far as she could, angrily. Her fingers twitched momentarily.

“You almost ruined it,” he spits out cold and aggressively. His bluish-grey eyes stormed, ripples of angry waves rolling from them. From the proximity, she swore she could feel the venom dripping from him as she released a breath she didn’t know she was holding. "And you bit me!"

She should have bitten harder.

She hisses back, “Shut it! How was I supposed to know that you were sneaking around?”

“Pads!” James growls, yanking at Sirius’ shoulder, “Fucking leave her alone. You’ve done enough today.”

“You gits!” Remus scolds, making his way back to the secret passage. He remained calm, directing his next sentences to the boys. “It was a mistake, okay? Calm the fuck down or you two will get us caught.”

Sirius huffs out, childishly. “Whatever you say Moomy.”

“Ha. Ha.”

“What’s going on?” Y/N askes.

At this, Sirius calms down a bit before he looks at Y/N again, a strange expression settles on his face. James on the other hand is ecstatic, “Right! We’re setting up the last part of the plan right now. The itching spray!”

Oh!"

“Yeah. Wormy is already inside the Slytherin common room making sure the spiders and Dungbombs we put in there are working.”

“Did you say he’s inside their common room?”

At this, his smile grows, “Got their password by waiting outside their door and Polyjuice potion. Our dear Moony brewed it.” Remus’ face is smug, his chest puffed out.

“Holy shit! I didn’t know you took it this seriously. Couldn't you be expelled for this?!”

"Godric, maybe Remus needs to give you his prefect title."

“I’ll gladly give it to you — fuckin’ hate being one.” Remus jokes, “Nah, we’ll be fine as long as we don’t get caught.”

“We’ve got our goody-two-shoes over here. Everyone loves him, won’t suspect a thing.” James says. Her eyes are back on Remus, sweeping from his face then down to his shiny prefect badge.

“I’m their scapegoat.”

Sirius sighs impatiently before cutting in, “Alright, I’m sure you can go now. McGonagall is long gone.”

Everyone shoots him a look.

“Oi! No! Please join us!” James whines, “You’re already here and trust me it’ll be so fun!”

“He’s right, join us,” Remus says, “Besides, you suggested it and it’ll be safer and easier to cover our tracks.”

It sounded exciting and she did need a pick-me-up considering her wavering emotions lately. Although Sirius’ jaw clenched. He was scowling at her.

“I’d love to join you,” she says, looking Sirius in the eyes.

A silent whooping came from James who balled his fist, throwing them into the air in celebration. They huddled together just as Remus led them out of the passage and through the dark.

James, who shared qualities of a golden retriever, walked by her side, a pep in his step. "You get to see the action first-hand, excited?"

“Of course!”

James rambles on before his eyes gloss over. He’s unusually quiet. Simultaneously, he grabs her hand and stops abruptly, dragging her to the back of the group. He lends in to whisper, his eyes flicking momentarily to Sirius, “Why were you with him?”

“Who?” She whispers back.

“Regulus Black.”

“Oh, we were at the Slug Cl —” She cuts herself off as she realizes, her eyes widened before staring at him, “You were following me!?”

“No! No!” He says, bringing his hands up defensively, waving them around. "You were walking in the same direction as him! To the Slytherin common room! It wasn't on purpose!"

“I — how did you — I didn’t even see you!” She thought back to the crinkling noise, “Wait, we heard you!”

He sighs a bit as he pulls out a large fluid-like, shimmery, silvery cloak. Upclose, silver threads were woven onto it, patterns swirling into regal shapes. He handed her the cloak to feel. It was silky smooth and glittered prettily in the light. It looked similar to the reflection of stars in a lake at night.

“You’re not telling me this is a…” she gaped.

The boy was grinning from ear to ear as if it were sewn on his face permanently. In a way, it looked rather demonic. He looked as if his face were going to split into two. “You betcha! An invisibility cloak.”

Her mind finally caught up to her once again before thinking back to what James asked. “Why’d you want to know about Regulus?”

“Huh! E-erm… no reason.”

She punches him softly in the arm. “You lying bastard! You can’t be nosey and not tell me? He’s not… bad? Is he? I quite like him.”

“No he’s not… just —” James cuts himself off, fearing he might have said too much. He did not expect the conversation to turn in this direction. He quickly averts her attention to another topic. “The Slug Club?” He says loud enough so the entire group can hear, “How was it?”

She would make sure to push him on the topic later.

Meanwhile, Remus and Y/N groaned.

“Awful.”

“Dreadful.”

“Nosey git.”

“Happily annoying.”

“He must be an actual slug. He’s slimy and boring.”

“Merlin! It can’t be that bad!”

“Oh trust us,” Remus addresses, “It’s worse. The entire time he went on and on about stupid shit. Like what was it he said?” He looks at Y/N.

“Ugh, what?”

“When he went on about that kid— what was his name… Seán?”

“Ah! Wait,” she straightened up and mocked their professor. She fake coughs for dramatic effect. “Your aunt created the Capmisted potion! Ah yes, brilliant, brilliant! I wish I taught her when she was at Hogwarts. Say, you’re still close, right? Why don’t we invite her to come to one of these parties one day?”

Her painful attempt at a British accent made them laugh.

“What a fucking sleazy bloke,” Remus chokes out.

They continued to make their way down to the Slytherin common room. All four jumped at the sound of footsteps before Y/N felt the invisibility cloak being tossed over her body, along with the rest of the boys too. They waited until it passed before finally stopping at the dungeons.

The entrance to the common room was by a stretch of stone. The area was dimly lit, the ceiling was low and had an eerie look and feel to it. Plus the cold only made Y/N rub her hands up and down her arms, goosebumps left in their trail. A dripping sound encompassed them like a makeshift metronome.

It made her feel uneasy.

Peter, who was crouched and small, hid in the shadows and would’ve gone unseen had he not popped out and scared all of them.

“For fucks sake Wormtail! We thought you were a Slytherin earlier.”

Peter was gleeful. He donned a large smirk and his face was slightly red. The Polyjuice was almost completely worn off, however, Peter had a full head of black, thick hair. “I checked everything, the traps should be set to release at eight o’clock.”

“An hour long?”

“Needs time to travel around the room.”

“Positive?”

“Positive.”

“Now comes the fun part,” James nudges her.

“Oh, hi Y/N,” Peter says slightly confused.

“Hey, Pete, here to watch if you don’t mind.”

Peter takes a moment to look at the rest of the group, “More the merrier!”

“Alright, you geezas! Let's get this party started!” James announces. He digs through the side bag he was carrying, pulling out four pairs of dragonhide gloves and tosses them to the boys. “Sorry, haven’t got any for ya. Would’ve brought an extra if I knew you were comin’.”

“It's alright.”

“Okay,” Remus says before crouching down, a large bag on his side. “I’ll start attaching everything, you know what to do and be careful. Remember, do not touch your eyes.”

He looks up at her, “Y/N if you could, it would be helpful to be on the watch out.”

“Gladly.”

Remus unscrewed bottle after bottle, attaching nozzles on them while James helped him. Peter slid out a ladder that was concealed by magic in a slim nook. As he scaled it, Sirius held on tightly to it before he cast a charm to prevent it from sliding around.

Up high, concealed by darkness and magic, revealed hundreds of identical bottles before Remus sprang up, switching places with Peter as he attached the rest of the bottles onto a huge system.

It looked similar to a new-maj mechanical system. The components consisted of small wires, a timer, tape and string connected to them all, along with a small lever that was attached to the underside of a brick. With the aid of magic, they were all securely set into place and ready to be activated.

“What is that?” She turned to Peter.

“Moonys got the bottles up there programmed to spray every time certain people leave the common room. See, look,” he points to the almost non-existent glow on the wires.

She marvelled at their creation. It was large and must’ve spent hours trying to conduct it. Sirius and James were helping Remus by passing him the bottles and securing them to the top of the roof.

If only Lily was here to see this. She would have an aneurysm.

At one point, Peter had been passing the bottles up to Remus while Sirius and James fiddled around with extra dungbombs they had, scattering them around.

“Jeez, Moons, my arms feel like they’re on fire.”

Peter did look worn out before he panted out. His forehead was starting to glean from sweat.

“Why don’t I do it for now?” She says to him before looking up to Remus.

“Only if you want to.”

The two switched places and Peter handed her his gloves. She slipped them on before enchanting them to fit snugly around her hands. Bending down, she picked up a few bottles. They were unexpectedly very heavy. She understood why Peter had to take a break. Although Remus seemed to be fine. Compared to his slim look, Remus had an unusual amount of strength that surprised her.

They worked in phases. Every ten or so minutes, Peter and Y/N would switch positions. They all worked in silence. From time to time, Peter and her would crack a joke, causing Remus to overhear and chuckle himself.

Everyone was having a good time. Even Sirius perked up, being less hostile to the entire group and even her. She thought she was dreaming for a split second.

The group worked quickly and managed to attach all of the bottles along with Dungbombs with only a few interruptions from incoming students. Luckily, they had the cloak to cover themselves and their things.

By the time they were finished, it was past one in the morning. They all huddled together underneath the cloak. Unfortunately, it was only medium-sized and unable to fully cover everyone from sight. Sirius and Y/N, who were on the edge on opposite sides, their arms and legs would poke out. More than once, it became very uncomfortable and hard to squish everyone inside as they flattened themselves against a wall anytime they heard even the slightest of movements. They kept impossibly silent, aside from James who’d been elated; constantly making small jokes or making sound effects with his mouth. Remus had to flick him a few times to keep quiet.

As soon as they reached the Gryffindor tower, they removed the cloak.

“Gastropod!” Cheered Peter to the fat lady. She swung open for the five of them. The warmth of the fireplace crackled as they threw themselves on the sofas. They all tried to catch their breaths and still their pounding heartbeats.

Pure adrenaline pumped through her veins as she took a moment to take in what just happened.

James was grinning from ear to ear, Peter seemed cheerful, Sirius became somewhat tolerable, while Remus, as always, seemed tired.

Remus, covering his mouth in a half yawn muttered out, “It was fun having you here but I’m knackered. I’ll see you lot at breakfast. Night.”

“Me too,” Peter said. Sirius got up to followed them as they made their way up to the boy’s dorms.

James stayed with Y/N for a bit afterwards. Both were giddy and they even ate a few snacks she still had in her pockets.

“Wasn’t that fun!” he said, “Godric, you need to join more often.”

“I’ll think about it,” Y/N says playfully.

“I’m going to train you — gonna make you into a mini-me. My apprentice.”

“I think the world has enough of your arrogance.”

He laughed unbothered by the remark, “This is only the beginning. Just you wait.”

[opes-magnas]

『 as lonely as time can get. 』

It’s finally here!! I’m a terribly slow writer, and am really thankful to all those who waited for this! Hopefully you enjoy. Thank you so much to @hamjjy, @kaavijournals and Lady L for beta reading this, you guys are the best!

Listen to this playlist here for the best experience!

tw: cursing, body sensitivity, very subtle idea of anxiety and toxic relationships are portrayed.

~calypso <3

I. the moon can't shine on her own.

She looks serene tonight - high up in the night sky, not a single star to accompany her. Does the moon feel lonely like that? Does she ever need a warm hug? Perhaps she gets one from the sun, and he accompanies her all time. Does the sun shine for her? So that the world can see her beauty? Perhaps so. When she can't see him, she turns bloody red; she seems disturbed. Hurt. Lost. Her fury always frightened the humans. It made them shiver inside their homes, praying to see the familiar ball of light rise from the east to calm her down. Perhaps it is better if they could only see her beauty. But does that mean the sun shines, not to show her beauty, but to protect the humans from her true self? Perhaps so.

The sun and the moon are a pair. And they will continue to be.

As long as the moon can't shine on her own.

Let's stop thinking, Luna.

The moon seems lonely.

I look up at the clock. A red, metallic light tells me its 3:48 am, 3rd April. Great, now I can have four shots of espresso for breakfast. Thank you, oh great mind, for deciding that we needed to have that conversation earlier. I sit up on the bed and rub my eyes. The curtain flutters from the soft wind blowing in through the window. Cicadas fill up the silence as I look at the full moon illuminating my room another time. Oh, how I hate the moon. What a hypocrite. I look away, and my eyes find the pile of open textbooks and spark notes I abandoned. A small smile creeps up my face. At least I'll ace that History test tomorrow. I could imagine the Boba Tea reward from Leo in my hands already. Leo. The annoying kid next door who's been stuck with me since I was five. Don't worry, though. I don't like him. Not anymore. He made it extremely clear that I was 'a size too big' for him. Then why do I still hang out with him? Short answer - I beat him up, he apologized. I shall offer no elaboration. Still, a lump forms in my throat. And maybe because he wasn't completely wrong.

I get up to go grab a glass of water. Mochi is lying in her bed in the hallway. This is the first time she didn't stir awake when I thumped across the room. The poor fluffball of a cat is probably very tired from the bath I forced her into in the evening.

You need to lose a few pounds anyways, Luna. Get rid of those love handles. Maybe some fat on your back too. That'll make people find you more approachable.

It isn't toxic if it's true, right?

That night, I decide that my glass is half-empty rather than full, and go back to bed. Suddenly, Mochi wakes up and runs into my room. She snuggles in and throws her paws on my hair like it's her property. I choose to oblige the demon for today.

The last thing I see before sleep lures me is the clock gleaming '3:59 am'.

/////-----

It's too warm in my blanket. I almost want to peel my skin off. I need to get sleep, I have a test soo- I jolt awake. Mochi is no longer next to me. I assume she's back in the comfort of her bed, considering the temperature in the room. I let out a groan as my hand outstretches to the switchboard. After a few terrible attempts, I finally turn on the ceiling fan. As sleep threatens to take me again, I see that it's still dark out and the moon looks just as annoying as it did earlier, its ever luminant light breaking down the walls of my privacy. My eyes turn to the direction of the clock- 3:48 am, 3rd April. Huh, weird. I realize I must have had one of those five-minute, extra strength-giving, amazing nap- Wait why does the clock say it's 3:48 am?

I grab my phone. The sudden light blinds me for a second, and through squinted eyes I see 3:49 am on the screen. Huh, really weird. Wasn't I awake just now  - err, earlier? Wait what? I realize I make no sense, maybe I just read the time wrong the first time. My brain is repeating the features of the Hammurabi Code, my drowsy eyes are drooping, and I meet slumber once more.

I barely feel Mochi slipping back into my blanket.

/////-----

I wake up in wonder why my alarm hasn't rung yet. The room is still dark, the moon stares at me curiously. Give me some privacy, moon. My eyes turn towards the clock for the third time this night- 3:46 am, 3rd April. Bullshit. I've been asleep for hours now; I won't need those four espresso shots for breakfast anymore. My tongue clicks involuntarily. Is this some sort of a stupid prank? Leo is definitely behind this, I'm going to hunt that dipshit down.

Come to your senses, Luna. The universe cannot prank you. That's impossible. And stupid.

I grab my phone again. An attempt in vain, I realize, when I see the screen displaying the same time. I text Leo.

| loser |

you (3:46 am, 03.04.2021): you awake?  (read) 

loser (3:48 am, 03.04.2021): no

A chill goes down my spine. Did the just relive 3:38 am? I decide to call Leo. Two rings in, I hear a familiar voice, 'I said I wasn't awake.' He sounds tired, voice raspy and strained. You'd think he'd just woken up from the but he's the sort of person who thinks sleep is for the weak. 'Yeah no shit, Sherlock. I'm speaking to your alter ego, Thomas.', I reply.

He decides to ignore my bad retaliation, and saves me from the embarrassment. 'Why is my star pupil awake at 3 in the morning? Has she forgotten about the test she will help me cheat tomorrow?', he asks. Ah, this freeloader. I'm gonna kick his ass. My hands move frantically in the air out of annoyance, 'I am not helping you with anything!', I scream-shout into the phone, afraid I'll wake Mochi up in the hallway. She's a bigger annoyance than Leo; no one in the universe has energy to deal with a grumpy Mochi.

'Honey, you love me.'

'You're being delusional.', I deadpan.

'Is my chubby baby irritated?', he says in a fake cooing voice. And that got me.

'Leo, I did not call you at 3 in the fucking morning for you to put me down.'

The other side of the line immediately goes silent. Silence that reminded me of the last time this happened. Silence between the two of us on a Boba Tea study session in the park after an argument, the only sound being the pages of my sociology textbook being turned, and of the sound of baby birds in a nest nearby. Though I know that Leo meant it as a term of endearment, I couldn't believe he wouldn't ever, well, consider me more than just a friend because of it. A few seconds (sometimes minutes) pass before -

'I'm sorry, Lunie, you know I don't mean it,'

Another apology.

I sigh. I'm tired of this conversation again. I'm tired of having to deal with the same problem again. I'm tired of people putting me down. I'm tired of blaming myself. I'm tired of trying to look pretty. I'm tired of Leo. I'm tired of me. I'm tired of another heartbreak. I know his apology is genuine. I know he doesn't mean it. I know he's just being the Leo he always is. But somehow his words still continue to haunt me. Maybe it's because it's coming from someone who means to me the most, coming from someone who brightens me up, like the sun does to the moon.  Then why am I the only one taking it seriously? Why am I trying to fit into someone else's standards? Why am I so painfully aware of everything but still choosing to be blind?

Why am I not able to love myself even though I want to?

'Luna? You there?', his voice breaks me from my train of thought. Weirdly, he sounds quite scared. 'I didn't realize how much it bothers you, I swear I won-'

Mochi jumps onto the bed and snuggles into my head again, paws in a similar place in my hair. A weird sense of Deja vu washes over me again. And then-

『 pop! the world has reset.』

My eyes opened in fear as a gasp escapes my mouth. I'm sitting on my bed, trying to comprehend what just happened. The curtains flutter with the wind blowing by. The moon stares in curiosity. My phone's on the bedside table. The clock gleams with a bright '3:01 am' displayed on it. And the problem is that I wasn't dreaming, and I wasn't mistaking the time either.

I'm in a time loop.

II. a tub fills with water only to spill it.

I fucking hate whoever wrote Groundhog Day.

Like who decided that? Who decided to say 'Hey, let's make a movie based on time loops!'? 'Let's make a dude live the same day all over again till he gets it right! Let's make him really happy, then really sad!'

Son, I'm this close to pulling an Ides of March on you.

I seem to be looping every hour, more specifically from three in the morning to four. Five hours have passed by, but my clock tells me it's precisely 3:18 am. Great. My dearly detested friend, the moon, is my only companion in this war with time (sorry Mochi). In the five hours that should have gone by, I have accomplished the following:

Two and a half hours of sleep - though I wake up when the clock resets.

Half an hour of revision for that History test I need to write after I get out of this shit.

Thirty minutes of planning a workout, Fifteen minutes of Yoga.

Five minutes of trash talking the moon, Ten minutes of dealing with grumpy Mochi who woke up as I exercised.

Thirty minutes of wondering if Leo's looping with me, and

Half an hour of figuring out what went wrong, and how to make the night perfect.

I don't know how much longer I'll be able to remember anymore. I've tried everything - making notes, scribbling on the wall, writing on myself, engraving things on desk - but none of them seem to make it through when the loop resets. I'm too tired to talk to Leo, knowing very well that he would definitely not believe me. And partly because I'm afraid I'll lose my temper and get hurt again. I'm afraid I'll end up being the insecure bad guy, and he doesn't deserve that. He deserves someone better. Someone who's prettier, kinder and happier. Not telling him for the time being also meant that I'll never find out if he was looping with me. But that probably isn't the case, the universe is cruel for a reason. This is perhaps its punishment for me. I must go through this alone.  No one's ever been by my side anyways.

I'm as lonely as the moon.

/////-----

Another few hours pass. The pop between every reset scares me lesser and lesser. But my desperation to return back to normal is growing. I've been trying to figure out what went wrong for the past hour in the neighbourhood park. The cold air  perfectly paired up with the mint chocolate chip ice cream in my hands. Was it me staying awake this long? Should I have just gone to sleep?  There must have been something I did wrong that hour. My heart wishes to call Leo and confide in him. And the more time goes by, the more my mind wishes to oblige to that crazy request.

I pull out my phone, which gleams a bright '3:58 am'. It's almost time for the reset. In two minutes, I'll be magically transported back to my bed. I sigh. I can't take living the same hour again. The hour grips my sanity like it is a play toy. I waste another countless moment wondering where I went wrong.

『 pop! the world has reset.』

Well, I guess there's no place like home. I wonder if Mochi was worried the previous hour when she didn't find me in the bed. Do cats feel worry for their owners? Does Mochi care for me? What kind of a disgusting ship is this? Cringe, cringe, cringe. Shut up, Luna. I bury my nonsensical idea of my cat showing me love for once in the deep pits of my mind, and pretend I never thought of such blasphemy. I shift under my blankets, and decide to sleep through this hour, foolishly hoping that the reset would never take place if I was never awake, though I woke up when the clock reset each time earlier. My eyes look at the clock - 3:05 am.

That's when doorbell suddenly rang. I launch up in surprise. This didn't happen before. My heart begins to pound extremely hard, my head hazed in confusion. I run towards the door as quickly as possible stirring Mochi awake in the process, and fling it open.

It's Leo. And he's in tears.

His eyes are filled with fear, breath unsteady. Beads of sweat line his neck as he tries to get words out. Leo grips my hands tightly, as though he wants me to hold him and tell him it was going to be okay. This hasn't happened in a very long time. He's gotten a much better hold on his anxiety in the past few years. I pull him into a hug and mutter words of comfort. His head is leaning on mine, and his breath slows. I tell him we'd be alright, and hum a calming tune. And we stay like that for the next five minutes.  

'Luna,', Leo whispers into the night. 'Would you believe me if I told you something crazy?'

'Like what?'

'Like a war against the clock.'

And that's when I knew. Tears start brimming in my eyes as I give out a sigh of relief. 'Like a time loop?', I say as I hug Leo a little tighter. This time I needed one to remind me I wasn't alone. He seems to catch on as well, a sob escapes from him as he melts in. We stay in each other's arms, in each other's comfort - a place where walls were deaf to all the shared secrets, a sanctuary with no limits.

Oh, what I'd do to protect it.

Leo pulls away, his eyes disappear and his lips form into a sheepish grin. His face is puffy from all the crying, but it glows in the soft moonlight. My eyes widen in surprise as he grabs my hand and drags me out the door. I manage to see the clock on the kitchen counter gleaming with a bright '3:15 am.' before blood rushed to my face upon meeting the cold air.

'Where are we going? Are yo- ah it's fucking cold out here!', I complain.

'Ice Cream.' Classic hungry Leo. This boy is a demon.

iii. the twilight hour.

'What's wrong with you?!', I huff as I bend down to catch my breath and hide myself under a tree. Leo, on the other hand, is breathing quite easy, a stupid grin plastered on his face (oh, how I want to punch him). His hands hold up a bag with three tubs of mint chocolate Ice Cream like they're the greatest creation of God. 'Did you really have to steal Ice Cream?! Are you five?', I say as I recall the incident that just took place, how Leo basically ran out the convenience store with the sweet goodies without paying and left me, his dear, penniless (and only) friend as the bait to a potential flat-earther of a cashier (long story, don't ask).

And now we're here, the park I was in the previous hour. There's not a single soul around. The only companion being the moon once again. His smile shines through like the sun, however.

'I'm rweally sowwy, delulu,', he retorts.

'My name is Luna, and no one can ever be as delusional as you, you dill hole.', I say, my ears red.

'Good now, I shalt promoteth thee to 'Deluna'. Thee has't been felicitat'd.'

I click my lips in annoyance. I know quite well that when the clock resets, all the stolen Ice Cream would be back in the freezer. But I try my best to maintain a straight face to show my discontent. That's right Luna, assert your fucking dominance. I notice that his hazel eyes shining with the mischief I'm used to once again. He's back to the loud, obnoxious and teasing Leo he's always been. Leo who's carefree, Leo who's horribly reckless, Leo who finds happiness in uncertainty. My Leo. My lips slowly curl into a smile, and I give in. He's happy, and that makes me happy too. Leo suddenly pulls out his phone.

'Look here, Partner in time.', he says cheekily.  I hear a click. My brows wring into discomfort and confusion.

'What? You look pretty in the moonlight.', he states without skipping a beat. There's a million tugs in my stomach, and blood rushes to my bronze skin. Butterflies soon turn into more sinister as I remember our conversation on the phone earlier. My face falls, if only this boy knew what he puts me through. First I'm not good enough, and now I'm pretty? Does he really throw around stuff like that without giving it a second thought? Does he not realize all that he's putting me through?

This is pointless. My feelings for him are pointless. The amount of time I waste on this is pointless. 'Our friendship is pointless.', I say. Regret follows immediately. Leo's face turns grim too; an unreadable expression plastered on his face. I suddenly remember something I jotted down my sociology textbook.

words left unspoken, my hearts screams, my head's in pain, we are in conflict.

Tears well up in my eyes again. This is a conflict, the most peaceful one at that. Terrifying. One that makes you curl into a ball and wish you never existed. One fueled by guilt, by insecurity, by ignorance. I remember the rest of the poem.

one of us was meant to get hurt, almost as though the heavens proclaimed it, on the day of creation. the celestial sky cried tears of gold, for it knew fate was cruel, but humans are crueler.

My hands are getting colder. My breath is hitching as my sobs get louder. Leo rushes towards me and tries to pull me into another hug. As much as I try to resist, he pulls me into his embrace. Fear devours my heart as I realize how I didn't feel at home anymore. I knew this sanctuary was going to break sooner or later. My heart is sick. It pains far too much as it beats in his embrace. Will it stop if I pull away? I try.

It does.

'Luna, what's wrong?!', Leo asks, truly afraid of what was happening.

'Us, Leo. Us.', I reply, voice barely a notch away from a whisper.

'What's wrong with us? We're Leo and Luna! You're the other half of thi-'

'Stop. Please.', I say firmly. My head feels too heavy, my heart too light. The moon shines down on me in its disgusting glory. I can't take it anymore. 'You're the reason I hate the moon, Leo. Because you are the sun. You only shine on me to mock me. To make me feel inferior.'  

'What're you talking abou-'

My tongue clicks loudly. 'You're so hypocritical!  You're an asshole who makes me feel like I'm the only one in the world, before throwing me out yourself. You make me feel insecure, Leo. I don't feel like I'm myself with you anymore.', I say, vitriol burning my throat. 'You disregard what I feel for you, because I'm the moon. You outcast me, because I'm the moon. You tie me down.

'You remind me of why I'll never shine on my own.'

I look at Leo. His hazel eyes turned dark, head down in shock. There's not a single drop of water in his eyes. He stands under the moonlight in silence. I can hear my heart palpitating.

'Why do you think the Sun shines, Luna?', he whispers. 'Is it to light the day, or to light the night?', he asks, a little louder this time. I open my mouth to answer.

'It's to light the night, Luna.', he interrupts. He knew I'd say neither. The sun shines for himself. He is selfish.

'The sun sheds it's light, because if it didn't, the moon would never-'

'That's exactly the prob-'

'get to see the world.' I stop midway in confusion. What is he saying?

'The sun shines because he wants the moon to see the world, Luna. He shines because if he didn't, the moon would be lonely. He makes sure to shed the perfect amount of light on her, so that she guides the traveler without scalding them, without making them blind.

'If he never shone, he'd have never have found his other half. The sun would have been just as lonely as the moon would have, Luna. The sun and moon are a pair, not because the moon can't shine on her own, but because they are lonely without each other.', Leo says.

And epiphany struck down like lightning. Leo needs me as much as I need him. He'd be just as lonely as I'd been without him. The moon's identity without the sun hadn't ever been her own. It was due to the sun's light she was herself. The sun made her the moon, and the moon made him the sun. They were inseparable, as destiny willed them to be, for they needed each other. For the sun to shine the brightest, and the moon to give comfort. But all that didn't answer why-

'Why did you say I wasn't enough for you?', I say, reminiscing that day in the park.   I remember picking out a bouquet of purple lilacs after studying a book about plant symbolism in the library. I spent hours trying to make myself look pretty. I spent a lot of time trying to make up my mind. And everything came crashing down.

'Because you deserve more!', Leo says in defeat, fingers brushing into his hair. 'Do you know how much of a loser I am? You deserve a hunk-a-ilicous person, are you really going to settle for a noodle?!', Leo says, gesturing to his lean figure. As sarcastic as his response seemed, he meant every word of what he said. That's just how Leo is.

'Leo, that's exactly how I've been feeling this whole time.' I pull Leo into a hug.  

Leo is no different than I've been my whole life. He's just as insecure and broken as I am, as I've always been. All my life, I'd seen him as a completely different person. We have different hobbies, we have different personalities. But we're still similar in ways that make us, well, us. It's just that our sanctuary needed to break to have it's walls built back stronger. I feel at home again.

'You're more of a sausage though. Alri-ALRIGHT lemme clear up, you're MY sausage okay? The best one in fact, I will use you in all my dishes.', Leo says as I pull out of his embrace and find a stone on the road to attack the disrespectful brat. Leo runs away and makes his way behind the usual Banyan tree at the edge of the park. 'That's literally the worst nickname ever!', I yell as I chase him.

'Mine own dearest sausage I begeth thee to reconsid'r!'

'TRY ME BITCH.'

'Hey, hey wait.', Leo holds down my hands and blocks my attack, and I'm left with no weapon except for the daggers in my eyes I choose to use against him. 'So, what are we now?', he asks.

'We're still Leo and Luna, dumb head.', I say after giving it a thought. Leo opens his mouth to refute, but soon decides against it. I assume he's content with the answer. We were friends, nothing could ever break that. Would we ever be something more? Who knows, maybe we would in the future when we love ourselves a little more, when we're comfortable with who we are, rather than who we're with.

Until then, we are Leo and Luna.

///////------

My eyes flutter open. I am leaning on the trunk of the Banyan tree next to Leo. I find myself in sleepy laughter as I look at his head lodged in between the roots of the tree. And suddenly, I see light in the distance. I immediately wake up from my position near the tree and walk to the edge of its canopy, heart beating in my stomach and look at the sky outside. The dark navy night melts into a light lilac, small streaks of tangerine bordering the the horizon. The birds are beginning to chirp in the trees, though the street lights are still on.

The time loop has stopped.

Meanwhile, Leo had stirred awake. He runs with his eyebrows up in surprise and squeezes the life out of me before his eyes turned dark in fear.

'WE HAVE SCHOOL.', he exclaims. I ignore him, and choose to stare into the sky. I look at the twilight hour. The sun and the moon were side by side, in harmony, like Leo told me. Tears escape my eyes in a sense of accomplishment. I could rest now. I give myself a small hug, and tell myself I'd worked hard. ('LUNA DO YOU REMEMBER THE HAMMURABI CODE.' 'That is not important right now!') The sun rises up, and salvages the few moments he has with the moon. I turn my head to the side and see that the moon looks serene, her light glow slowly fading as she decides to rest too.

But above all, I see that the moon is no longer lonely.

a/n: ahhhh yes if you’ve made it this far, i truly truly appreciate you for reading this, it means a lot to me. the past few days have been a little weird for me, and it took more than just motivation for me to get through writing this. again, thank you to all my beta readers, i really treasure all of you! i’d really love to get an ask about the short story, so if you enjoyed, make sure to send me one! i hope everyone’s staying safe! stay tuned with us because we have another surprise coming soon!

alatcg taglist:  @blue-hairbrush, @kaavijournals, @artbyeloquent, @47crayons, @writing-is-a-martial-art

general writing taglist: @shinesundark, @the-writing-avocado, @raenawrites​

@original-writing​

[iridescent-hallucinations]

When the Night Comes Chapter 2

Mild Angst, Mental Health TW.

Summary: JJ shares a piece of her own darkness with Emily.

Pairing: Jennifer “JJ” Jareau x Emily Prentiss 

Read it on AO3

“Pull it together Prentiss, this was not part of the plan” she muttered to herself, she grabbed the glasses and made her a way back into the other room.

Once they were settled, sitting on opposite sides of the room, a conscious choice that Emily had made, the women sat in a comfortable yet obviously loaded silence, drinking their drinks.

“How was the bar?” Emily asked, trying to figure out whether or not JJ wanted to talk, they could just sit in silence, she wouldn’t mind that at all.

“Yeah, it was alright, I beat a couple guys at darts, watched Morgan get 3 numbers, and left after Penelope found a dancing partner. I missed you there,” it was an innocent enough statement. Emily had missed them all too, it was the way JJ had kicked her shoes off and tucked her legs up under herself to get more comfortable that was taking Emily’s attention.

It scared her, how easy it was to lose herself in JJ, everything seemed so natural when she was around, familiar, like home. But then again, what would Emily Prentiss know about home? She’d never had a real one. The closest frame of reference she had was fake. Was him. The thought was enough for her to shut the blinds again, no light could enter or he would be seen too.

Emily cleared her throat before she spoke again, worried she would reveal too much if she didn’t think carefully before words came out, desperate to stop her thoughts from eating her whole.

“Sounds like a good night.”

The small talk seemed to appease JJ. Humming in confirmation, she looked around the room for the first time since she’d entered the apartment, really looked, and noticed that there was no music on, no television on, the room was really dimly lit. She couldn’t stop the confusion spreading across her face quickly enough for Emily to not notice it.

“Were you just sat here in silence?” JJ sounded more perplexed than she had intended and regretted asking the question.

The brunette recoiled slightly, a conversation about what she had been doing before JJ had shown up was not high on her list of things she wanted to do right now.

Emily laughed nervously, fidgeting in her seat.

“I was just about to find something to read before you got here, I promise I’m not some weirdo who just sits in their apartment in the dark on their own drinking at night,” she knew she was lying through her teeth, and that over explaining did nothing but throw suspicion on the situation, but JJ didn’t seem to notice. Or if she did, she was too polite to challenge the older woman.

They returned to a comfortable silence for a few minutes after that, basking in the dim orange glow of the singular lampshade in the corner of the room.

Clinging to the safety that the dull room offered, Emily found herself once again drifting into thoughts of Jennifer, ones that usually made her blush. Thankfully her cheeks were already flushed from the alcohol she’d consumed. If they weren’t she’d risk giving a little piece of herself away. Illicit thoughts of smooth skin and hot breath, of todays and tomorrows and forevers were only made more tangible by the brightness glowing around the blonde sat opposite her.

Her brain was getting ahead of itself, it was running away from her, being tempted by the warmth of Jennifer’s presence. Emily was beginning to spiral, starting to lose her footing in the dark. She knew that she was in dangerous territory, she risked exposure.

All the while JJ knew Emily was still unsure as to why she had come. If she were to be totally honest, she wasn’t sure she had known why either.

JJ had been silently observing the brunette for a few minutes, seeing the shadows that framed her body dance, almost taunting the blonde. Despite her fear of the dark, JJ felt no fear while watching Emily. It was surprising, ordinarily she would run from the dark. The darkness encapsulated memories JJ had spent years storing away, of bathtubs filled with tears and regret, of futures stolen and childhoods ended.

But with Emily; the darkness doesn’t seem so dark.

After years of avoiding the night at all costs, JJ felt herself drawn in, why else would she have shown up unannounced with no motive other than to be close to Emily? Reaching for her metaphorical flashlight, JJ had made her decision, time to reach out and see what mysteries lay within the shadows around Emily’s soul.

“Have I ever told you about my sister?” JJ asked, staring Emily down with determination, afraid that she’d retreat if she didn’t clutch to the reality of Emily’s honey brown eyes.

Waiting for a reply, JJ untucked her legs, reached forwards to place her now empty glass down, and returned her hands to her lap.

“No, I didn’t want to pry,” Emily replied, unable to ignore the sadness swimming in her friend’s gaze.

“It’s a long story, she was unhappy, no one could pull her out from the darkness that had consumed the vibrant girl she once was. I was only young, of course, I didn’t really understand mental illness back then, it was just a monster that came in the middle of the night and stole her from me,” JJ had lowered her gaze, now choosing to stare at her knuckles, which were beginning to turn white from the way her hands were wringing each other.

Emily considered her carefully, watching the conflict play across her features but not wanting to interrupt. She felt the weight of the younger woman’s words stab at her own chest and she wanted nothing more than to go back in time to try and pull both little girls out from the grip of blackness that had overwhelmed them.

The knowledge that JJ had too flirted with darkness also saddened the older women. Her own demons were lurking so close to the surface, always ready to latch on and throw her into the abyss, it hadn’t really occurred to her that such iridescence as JJ would know how it felt.

JJ continued her monologue, still staring into her own lap, hoping that by sharing this part of her life, Emily would begin to understand what she was really trying to say.

“That’s the thing about losing someone you love so young, they take a piece of you with them. You’re forever changed by their presence in your world, one moment they’re shaping the way you think, the next they’re suddenly gone, before you’ve been built into the person you’re supposed to be. Nothing can replace them and no one can finish the work they started. There was so much I didn’t know back then, my mom tried, she really did, but she had her own darkness to fight off.”

JJ finally lifted her eyes, wondering when the room had gotten so small, and why the air was suddenly so thick. Emily felt so close and yet still so much separated them.

When Emily finally had the chance to once again look at JJ, she was overwhelmed by a tugging in her chest. A sad smile appeared on the blonde’s face.

“I don’t really know where that came from, sorry,” JJ said, seeing the hurt written in Emily’s face, almost a reflection of her own.

“No, don’t apologise, I’m grateful that you feel safe enough to share this with me,” Emily replied, moving her glass to the coffee table so that she could smooth the fabric of her trousers with her hands.

“I suppose what I’m really trying to say is that it takes one to know one, and I can see you’ve been visited by the same darkness as me, I just need you to know that we care. That I care. Don’t ever think you have to be in that dark place alone,” JJ finished, as she unclasp her hands and felt the tension in her muscles begin to relax.  

Emily was beginning to panic internally, but was determined to not let it show. There is far too much baggage in her past, like an old attic packed with years of trauma, while she lives in the house underneath, wondering when the ceiling would cave in from the weight of it all.

“I appreciate that Jayje, I really do, I’m so sorry you had to deal with all of that so young, it’s a lot for anyone, let alone a child,” her face softened as she imagined a little blonde girl with pig tails running around laughing one day and curled up in a ball crying the next.

Something about the way JJ was able to shelf her own trauma to offer a hand to Emily was so profound to her. How can one person carry so much weight and still offer to carry more without crumbling?

Jennifer Jareau was the strongest person Emily had ever met, and she deserved the best. And while she may not know everything like Spencer, Emily knew she was far from the best. She was compromised, she was broken, she was damaged beyond repair, but most of all, she was aching.

Emily ached from carrying her secrets, her muscles sore from withholding a sky full of night time. Her heart ached to reach out into the brightness of JJ’s soul, to allow the warmth to consume her instead of wandering eternally in a sunless cold.

A sudden jolt of electricity caused Emily to be resuscitated from her thoughts. Coming back to the present, she identified the source, JJ had walked over to her and was squatting in front of her, with her hand resting gently over Emily’s own.

“Hey, look at me, you went somewhere and left me behind,” JJ spoke softly, unsure as to when she’d become so bold but not questioning it.

As she was brought back to the room, Emily lifted her eyes from where JJ’s hand was covering over own up to the other woman’s face, seeing the way the blonde’s eyes flickered slightly, unable to decide where to look.

Emily’s other hand began to move without her consent, and before she could protest, it was cupping JJ’s cheek, stroking the soft skin there with its thumb. The warmth it found was so inviting and the fact that JJ hadn’t retreated at her touch caused her stomach to flip.

JJ’s eyelids softly shut at the contact as she inhaled, leaning in to the older woman’s touch. This time JJ felt the electricity between them too.

For when the light met the darkness a thousand fires burned. But when the darkness met the light, earthquakes erupted and tsunamis raged, the whole world stood still before spinning off its axis. The energy shared between them challenged a hundred supernovas and threatened to cause mass extinction. It could wreak havoc on ecosystems and tear apart the very fabric of time itself. However, in that moment, as they sat connected in mind and body, something else peaked through.

All these years of lurking in the supposed safety of shadows, Emily had forgotten, without light nothing grows. After all, it wasn’t until the Big Bang that life itself began.

[evilrubberducke]

Bump in the Night

A new oneshot with a bit of a different spin than usual from me. I hope you guys enjoy it, even if it is a little rough. 

A short note about why it’s been so long since I’ve written anything is included at the end.

Read it on AO3: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24302497 Read it on FF.Net: https://www.fanfiction.net/s/13530836/1/IzuMina-Week-2020

Izuku had never been a heavy sleeper, so when a thud echoed down the hallway of the apartment he and his mother shared, he awoke instantly. 

As he rubbed sleep from his eyes, he could hear footsteps padding down the hallway, as well as some muffled cursing. That alone confirmed that it wasn’t his mother going for a late night drink of water. She never cursed, no matter how angry or upset she was feeling.

He quickly slipped out of bed and cracked his bedroom door open. The hallway beyond was pitch black, but he could still make out the sound of footsteps padding away from him. If he had been more awake, he might have realized that the footsteps were coming from the opposite direction as the front door, but he was too exhausted from crying himself to sleep for the past week to realize that. He just knew that he had to follow the footsteps.

They led him into the kitchen, which only strengthened Izuku’s hope. His mother didn’t like late night snacks, saying that they ruined Izuku’s appetite the next day, so the footsteps couldn’t be hers. His father, on the other hand, always had a drink when he got home from a trip. 

“Daddy?” Izuku called, stepping into the kitchen, “Are you home? Mommy said you weren’t—” He froze as he took in the scene in the kitchen.

The refrigerator door was hanging open, the light inside illuminating the kitchen and throwing long shadows on the opposite wall. Standing in front of the refrigerator was a creature that was approximately Izuku’s size, with bright pink skin, ragged clothes, and a short tail that twitched back and forth with agitation as Izuku stared. It’s eyes were wide, allowing Izuku a perfect view of their black sclera and glowing golden irises. A pair of small, nubby horns poked out from it’s mop of curly pink hair, completing its otherworldly appearance.

Izuku couldn’t help it. He yelped in fear and surprise, stumbling backwards and tripping over his own feet in the process. As he toppled to the ground, Izuku sent a silent prayer to whatever gods were listening that the monster would be satisfied with just eating him, and would leave his mother be. That was all he hoped for, as he waited for the end.

And waited.

Finally, Izuku could wait no more. He cracked one eye open to see where the monster was, and was utterly baffled to find it nowhere in sight. The only sign that it had been there was the shaft of light coming from the open refrigerator, and an empty bowl lying in front of it.

With a flash of irritation, Izuku realized that it was the bowl that his mother had stored the leftover katsudon from their dinner that night in. All of his previous fear of the monster vanished. His mother had worked hard to make that food, and the monster had stolen it without a second thought.

He quickly picked himself up on the ground, and stomped petulantly over to the mostly empty bowl. It seemed as though the monster had run away, and left him to clean up the mess it had made. A part of him wanted to leave it for the morning, but he knew that would only upset his mother, and he didn’t want to make things harder on her. 

As he bent down to start cleaning, something caught his eye. On the far side of the kitchen, barely illuminated by the shaft of light from the refrigerator, the cupboard under the sink was cracked open, and the tip of a pink tail was poking out. As Izuku watched, the tip quivered and twitched wildly, giving away the monster’s location in an instant.

In just a few steps, Izuku was at the cupboard. He flung it open without any hesitation, but was stopped by what he saw inside.

The monster was cowering in the deepest part of the cupboard, its eyes as wide as saucers and its arms and legs pulled tight around its body. At that moment, it looked far less like a monster than a frightened puppy, hoping it wouldn’t be kicked again, even as it knew it would be. Izuku knew that look well. He’d seen it on the faces of the kids Kacchan would beat up on the playground before.

Before Izuku could say or do anything, the monster shocked Izuku by speaking up in strangely accented Japanese.

“I’m sorry! Please, please don’t hurt me!”

Izuku was temporarily dumbstruck. It’s… no, her voice was like nothing he’d ever heard before. Her tone danced up and down with every word, giving her speech an almost musical quality. It was also full to the brim with fear, so much so that Izuku was certain she wasn’t faking any bit of it.

“I-I’m not going to hurt you,” Izuku said, kneeling down so he could look her in the eyes. Not that she made it very easy. She kept her gaze firmly turned away from his. Only her tail gave any indication of her emotions, as it flicked back and forth.

“You’re not?”

“No!” Izuku said, scandalized at the very idea. He would sooner hurt himself than actually hurt someone else, even if she had stolen his favorite food.

“Why not?” she asked, uncurling a little bit from her defensive posture, “I took your food.”

“Because hurting people is wrong,” Izuku said. 

“You’re weird,” the creature said, finally raising her eyes to meet his. She still looked wary, but his reassurance seemed to have calmed a lot of her nerves.

“I’m weird?” Izuku said, unable to help himself, “You’re the weird one. You’re pink, and you have horns, and you steal katsudon.”

“Hey! I’m a perfectly normal imp!” she said indignantly, “You don’t even have horns! Or a tail! How are you supposed to balance without a tail?”

Izuku floundered for a moment as he tried to come up with an answer to the sudden question. He had spent plenty of time thinking about how he was different from other children because of his American father, but he had never considered something so basic as why he didn’t have a tail. 

Before he could come up with a response, one part of her statement derailed his train of thought.

“Ummm, what’s an imp?” The term sounded vaguely familiar, but Izuku couldn’t place where he had heard it, or what it meant.

She looked at him like he was an absolute idiot. “Me! I’m an imp! And someday, I’ll be a full fledged demon!”

Izuku’s jaw dropped open.

“Y-Y-You’re a demon?” he spluttered, scooting back slightly. He’d heard of demons, of course, but only in books or T.V. He’d never thought they were actually real.

“Nuh uh. I just told you I’m an imp. Demons are way bigger,” she replied, taking the opportunity to clamber out of the cupboard and dust herself off.

“S-So an imp is like a baby demon?” Izuku asked. He should probably be terrified out of his mind, but his fascination was overwhelming his fear.

Her eyes flashed with annoyance, and she stomped her feet. “I’m not a baby! Just cuz my horns are a little small, everyone thinks I am. But I’m not!”

It was obvious that Izuku had hit a sore spot, which he instantly regretted. He knew what it was like to have people mock him for something he couldn’t control, and that he would change in a heartbeat if he could.

“I-I’m sorry,” Izuku said, bowing to her, “I didn’t mean to upset you. I was just surprised. I’ve never met a future demon before.”

“Hmmph,” she huffed, “I suppose I’ll let you off the hook. But only because it’s obvious that you were wowed by how awesome I am!”

She wasn’t entirely wrong. He’d always loved learning about the world around him, and the revelation that there was a whole species that he barely knew anything about was fascinating. Talking to this imp was just like all the time he’d spent in the library reading books on cool animals, but a million times better. 

It was at that point that Izuku realized he’d overlooked something.

“Do… do imps have names?”

“Of course! I’m Mina. What’s your name?”

“I’m Midoriya,” he replied, sticking his hand out, “Izuku Midoriya.”

She cocked her head in confusion. “So, which is it? Midoriya or Izuku?”

It’s… both?” Izuku said, unsure of how to properly explain it, “Don’t demons have family names?”

“I guess?” she said hesitantly, “No one really uses them though. My brothers and sisters all know who I am, and no one else really talks to me unless they have to.”

“That sounds rough,” Izuku said, knowing exactly what it was like to be shunned by everyone except his mother.

“Eh, It’s alright. I’ve got plenty of friends to hang out with. Besides, once I become a full demon, I’ll be super popular.” 

Then, a wicked grin spread across her face as she stared at Izuku. “Plus, no one else I know has a human friend, so that makes me special! Thanks a bunch, Midori!”

Izuku could feel his brain short circuiting at that statement, for multiple reasons. She had called him his friend, the first friend he had made since Kacchan had stopped spending time with him several months ago. He could hardly believe that this was happening, and so soon after meeting her. He had only just learned her name, and she was already calling him her friend. But that wasn’t the only thing she was calling him. The nickname stuck in his brain and commanded his attention above all else. 

“M-M-M-Midori?” Izuku said, his voice squeaking as he spoke.

“Yep,” Mina said brightly, “Two names is way too many. And they’re too long! So, Midori!”

Surprised as he was, Izuku’s heart still swelled with happiness at the nickname. Unlike his other moniker, it didn’t contain a hidden barb. It was simple, honest, and friendly in a way that he hadn’t felt for a long time.

“T-Thanks,” he said softly, “I like it.”

“Well duh!!” Mina said, “That’s because I’m a nickname master!”

“A nickname master?”

“Uh huh! All my friend’s nicknames come from me, and everyone says that the ones I come up with are really unique!”

“I, uh, don’t know if that’s a good thing,” Izuku said.

“Course it is! Do you have any idea how hard it is to be special when you have 36 siblings? Especially when you’re the smallest one of them?”

Izuku’s mind boggled at the idea. After being an only child, the idea of having so many people around to talk and play with sounded like heaven. He couldn’t understand what she was complaining about.

“Is it really that hard?” Izuku asked. 

“Ugh, it’s the worst!” Mina said, hopping up on the counter and kicking her heels as she spoke, “Anytime I try to do something cool, I find out someone else has already done it. No matter what I climb, or whose tail I tweak, someone always beats me to it! I’m not even the first to come here. My sister apparently comes out to take chocolate all the time, not that she shares any of it with the rest of us.”

All of a sudden, the string of candy thefts that had been the talk of his school the last few months made much more sense. He knew at least two other kids in his class who had lost their favorite treats overnight, while candy stores across the city were running out of all kinds of sweets, much to everyone’s despair.

Thankfully, Izuku’s house had been spared up until this point, so he still had a few chocolate bars  saved up for special occasions. Whenever he did especially well on a project in school, he and his mother would take one of them from the cupboard and share it, nibbling it square by square while she praised his efforts. He wasn’t supposed to take them for himself, but his mother had never said anything about sharing one with a friend. He felt confident that she wouldn’t be too upset.

“M-Mina. Y-you said we were friends, right?”

“Of course!”

“Then… do you want to share a chocolate bar?”

“Wait, really?” Mina said, staring at him incredulously, “This isn’t a trick or anything, is it? I can actually have some?”

“I-I wouldn’t trick you like that,” Izuku said, a part of him slightly offended at the idea he would do something so cruel. He knew she didn’t think he was a mean person, and was probably only suspicious because other demons or imps had tricked her like that before, but he still felt the need to prove his words true. 

He quickly made his way over to the cabinet where his mother kept the delicious treats, and pulled out one of the bars. The milk chocolate bar that he selected was the last of its kind, and smaller than some of the others, but he got the feeling that Mina would prefer it to the dark chocolate bars that his mother favored, and that he had grown to appreciate. He quickly peeled the wrapper off and broke the bar in two, handing the slightly larger piece to Mina.

It was gone in a blink, consumed in a single bite by the pink imp. She squealed in delight as she chewed, her tail twitching back and forth in a staccato rhythm of happiness, the same way a puppy would when given a treat.

“Ish soooo good!” Mina exclaimed before she could even finish chewing, “ ‘M never eatin anything else!”

Izuku giggled, her joy and enthusiasm at the simple treat infectious. “You’d get sick if you ate that much chocolate,” he said, doing his best to break the news gently.

“Don’t care,” Mina replied, licking her palms clean of any remaining chocolate. As she did, Izuku noticed that her tongue was long and forked at the end, like a lizard’s.  “I’ll be sick forever if it means I can eat more chocolate!”

“I’m glad you liked it,” Izuku said sincerely, “Sorry there isn’t more.”

“It’s okay,” Mina said with surprising enthusiasm, “I’ll bring some of my own next time, so we’ll have lots and lots to share!”

“N-Next time?”

“Course!” Mina said with a grin, “We’re gonna hang out all the time, especially once I learn how to make my own portals!”

“Really?” Izuku said, barely able to believe it. 

Mina nodded. “We’re gonna hang out all the time, and eat chocolate, and be best friends forever!”

To Izuku, that was the best plan in the entire universe.

---

7 years later

---

Izuku was studying in his room when a sudden crack filled the air, causing him to jump. He really should be used to Mina’s entrances by this point, but they always seemed to catch him by surprise. A part of him suspected that she did something to make them extra surprising, not because she was malicious but because she liked having attention for her entrance.

On the opposite side of the room, a floating rift in the fabric of the world had appeared, allowing him a glimpse into Mina’s room in the other plane. It was a little smaller than Izuku’s own, with dark stone walls and a rather gothic looking chandelier in the center. Aside from that, it looked like a relatively normal teenage girl’s room. She had an assortment of stylish black and purple furniture, most of which was covered in various magazines and candy wrappers, a chair piled high with clothes that she hadn’t quite gotten around to folding, and even a few cute looking stuffed animals surrounding her bed. Apparently she had a thing for bunny rabbits with overly exaggerated floppy ears.

“Guess who!” the demon girl in question called, bursting through the portal in a shower of pink sparks that served as magical confetti.

As he always did, Izuku marveled at how much Mina had changed since they first met. If it weren’t for the bright pink skin and enthusiastic personality, she could almost be an entirely different being than the tiny imp he had met all those years ago.

She stood just under five feet tall, not including the long pair of horns that protruded up from her forehead, curling back slightly at the tips. Her tail had lengthened as well, becoming long and prehensile enough that she could pick up light objects with it, or just tickle Izuku from a distance with the heart-shaped tip. The greatest change, however, was that she had sprouted a large pair of bat-like wigs. She could apparently use them to fly, though not for very long. In Izuku’s experience, she mostly just used them to keep the sun out of her eyes when she was trying to nap. 

Her clothes were fairly eye catching as well, though that was mostly due to how risque they were compared to most of the girls Izuku saw around town. They were obviously custom made for her, or at least altered, since they had openings to accommodate her wings and tail. The T-shirt was very low cut, exposing quite a bit of skin, and her shorts lived up to their name. 

“I guess Mina,” Izuku said, setting his textbook to the side so he could give her a proper greeting. Despite how much she had changed, she was still his childhood friend, and no amount of impending homework would keep him from spending time with her. 

The fact that he was crushing hard on her probably also factored into that decision. 

He’d just gotten to his feet when Mina closed the portal behind her with a snap of her fingers and bounded forward, pulling him into a tight hug.

“You guessed right!” she said happily, nuzzling against his chest and nearly poking him with her horns several times as she did so.

“Did something happen?” Izuku asked, lightly patting her back. Mina always enjoyed physical contact, but this was excessive affection, even for her.

“Nah,” Mina said, remaining firmly attached to him, “I just missed you.”

“Mina, it’s barely been a week since we hung out,” Izuku replied.

“Yeah, and that’s way too long. I need Izu cuddles or I’ll die of loneliness.���

He sighed at the exaggeration, but wrapped his arms around her, careful not to pinch her wings, and squeezed. Mina sighed in contentment, and snuggled closer to him. In doing so, she pressed entirely up against him, causing Izuku to flush. She had the kind of figure that many women would kill for, and it was times like this that made it very hard to forget that fact. 

“M-Mina, your—”

“Shhhhhh,” Mina hissed, placing a finger to his lips, “Relax. You can go back to studying in a minute. For now, just let me enjoy this.”

There was absolutely no way that Izuku could relax like this, but he did his best to follow Mina’s request while keeping his gaze pointed firmly upwards. She was his oldest and closest friend. He didn’t want to freak her out, or irritate her by openly displaying his crush.

“Izuku…” Mina said, pulling him back to the moment, “You know, you don’t have to keep looking away…”

He glanced towards her, confused by the statement, and nearly had a heart attack. Her eyes were half lidded as she stared up at him, twin pools of darkness with a gently glowing golden center and veiled with dark pink lashes. As he stared, Izuku felt like he was being inexorably drawn into them, even more so than usual.

Slowly, ever so slowly, he leaned forward just a hair. Not enough to close the gap between them, or even to close it significantly, but enough to be noticeable. Enough to draw a sharp breath from Mina. Enough to make her close her eyes and learn forward as well.

As if on cue, Izuku’s phone began to ring, startling both of them.

He felt guilt rush through him, and quickly stepped back from the embrace. Despite his vow not to pursue his feelings for Mina so that he wouldn’t make her feel uncomfortable, he had nearly done exactly what he’d been afraid of. He’d nearly forced himself on her, when she was just being friendly.

Mina meanwhile had retreated to the other side of the room in a pout, grumbling something about “losing progress”, and how hard it was to train a herbivore. 

Izuku was impressed that she knew the term, since it was more complex than her usual vocabulary, though he made a mental note to correct her usage of the term later. He enjoyed katsudon far too much to be considered a herbivore. 

His musings distracted him enough that he almost let the call go straight to voicemail, only realizing at the last second that he should probably answer his phone, in case it was important.

“Hello?”

“Izuku!” his mother said, sounding halfway between elation and tears, “Honey, I’m so proud of you! This is such a big step! But, why didn’t you tell me?”

“T-tell you?” he asked, his already overtaxed brain struggling to catch up to the conversation, “Tell you what mom?”

“About your application letter to UA!”

His jaw dropped open. He most certainly hadn’t applied to UA. It was one of the top schools in the country. Even if he did apply, he stood no chance of getting in. Thousands of people requested acceptance every year, and only a fraction of those were allowed to take the incredibly difficult entrance exam. Of course, he would be thrilled to attend, but he had never considered it as a real option. Just a pipe dream.

“I… what?” he said intelligently.

“Oh, I’m sorry honey. Did you want it to be a surprise? Is that why you used a special envelope? I didn’t mean to pry. I was only curious, since it was such a lovely color.”

A thought struck him then. He never sent letters with any sort of fancy stationary or envelopes, but he knew someone who did. Someone who had a flair for the dramatic, and who knew about his ridiculous dream to attend UA. Someone who even then was staring at him in curiosity.

“Mom, the envelope you’re talking about? What color is it?”

“It’s pink,” she replied, confirming his suspicions in an instant, “Are you feeling alright honey? You sound stressed.”

“I’m fine,” he lied, “Just a little tired. Mom, do you mind if I call you back? I have to finish studying.”

“Oh, with that kind of attitude, you’ll get in for sure. I’m so proud of you, Izuku! I’ll make katsudon for dinner tonight to celebrate!”

“That sounds great. Bye mom,” Izuku said, lowering his phone to his side and leveling his gaze at Mina.

She must have realized that her plot had been discovered, since she was staring at the floor while she traced some arcane pattern with her foot. Her tail was twitching back and forth behind her, making her agitation even more obvious.

“Surprise?” Mina said, looking up at him innocently. Thankfully, her eyes didn’t pull him in like before.

“Mina, you filled out an application to UA for me?” 

“Uh huh,” she said, relaxing a little when she saw he wasn’t angry with her. Despite the many years they had known each other, her instinctive reaction was still to shrink away from him. It was only when he treated her with kindness instead of anger that she relaxed and could be honest about her actions.

“Why?”

“You were talking about it like it was some amazing place to be, and you got me excited about it too. Then you said it was only for really smart people, so you weren’t going to go. And you got all sad about it. But you’re really smart, smarter than anyone else I know. I know you’re gonna be awesome there! You just needed a little push.”

For a long moment, Izuku said nothing. Hearing Mina praise him like that made him feel more than a little giddy, and not just because he had feelings for her. But the more rational part of him knew that it was only because she didn’t know any humans besides him. If she did, she would see just how average he was, would stop thinking of him as someone special, and would think of him as just another human.

“Mina it… it doesn’t work like that,” Izuku said, once he had finally gotten his thoughts in order.

“Then the way it works is stupid,” she pouted, “You deserve to go wherever you want, even if it is some stupid, boring, stuffy school. You’re the awesomest person I know!”

“I’m the only person you know,” he pointed out, which only seemed to make her more frustrated. 

“Just because I spend a lot of time with you, it doesn’t mean that I don’t watch T.V., or go people watching, or listen to all the stories other demons tell. I listen all the time, and I know that you’re special. You’re smart, and you’re kind, and you work harder than anyone I’ve ever heard of.”

As she spoke, she stomped angrily towards him, until she was standing just a few inches away. Her eyes were wide, but they held none of the gentle liquidity from before. They were harder than he’d ever seen, and made her look every bit the demon that she really was.

“So, you listen to me, mister. You are going to apply to that school, and you are going to get in. Then you’re going to show everyone else exactly how amazing I already know you are. And when all of that is done, you are going to hand feed me chocolate until I burst, tell me how right I was all along, and apologize until you’re purple in the face. Understand?” With each sentence, she poked him firmly in the chest, to emphasize her point.

He wanted to argue, to tell her that she was wrong about him and the whole situation. She was completely oversimplifying things, and letting her friendship with him cloud her judgement. But her expression told him that it would be pointless. Mina had set her mind to the idea of him getting into UA, and if there was one thing he had learned over all these years, it was that Mina always got what she wanted, particularly when it came to him doing things.

“O-Okay. I’ll do it,” Izuku said, doing his best to sound more confident about the situation than he actually was. “I’ll try to get into UA.”

The smile that bloomed across Mina’s face made agreeing worth it. Sure, aiming to pass UA’s entrance exam would mean countless hours of studying and effort, but he would do it all happily just for one more glimpse of that radiant grin.

“That’s my Izuku!” she said, pumping her fist into the air as she did so. “You’re gonna be the best University person ever!”

Izuku chuckled. Leave it to Mina to get so excited about something she knew next to nothing about.

“A doctor,” he corrected, “I want to be a doctor, so I can help people.”

He’d briefly considered a career in demonology a few years back, considering he was probably already somewhat of an expert in the field thanks to Mina, but had ultimately decided against it. No one else really took it seriously, and he couldn’t see Mina sitting still long enough to do any sort of examination unless bribed with copious amounts of candy.

“That’s so you,” Mina said, settling down on his bed and arching her back until it popped. “You’re always helping everyone around you, even if they’re a little imp stealing your leftovers.”

“Of course. Everyone needs help sometimes. And I think meeting that imp was one of the best things to ever happen to me,” Izuku replied with a broad smile.

Mina’s irises seemed to flash for a moment, transforming from circles to twin golden hearts. Then she shook her head vigorously, and they were “normal” again. It was fast enough that if he weren’t used to Mina doing a variety of mystical things, he would have dismissed it as his imagination. That said, he couldn’t figure out exactly why the change had happened. Knowing her, it was probably some sort of joke that he was missing.

Before he could ask about the change, Mina grabbed the textbook he had been reading from when she entered and flipped it open to a random page.

“Here. Why don’t you read it to me?” she said quickly.

“Come again?” Izuku said, completely baffled by the request.

“Well, you’re gonna be studying all the time now, but I don’t want to be bored. So, you can read to me while I snack. Win win!” she replied, producing a candy bar from seemingly nowhere.

“Mina, I’m studying algebra. You’re going to be bored even if I do read it to you.”

“Nuh uh. I like listening to you talk. Doesn’t really matter what you’re talking about,” she casually admitted.

His face burned once again. After the earlier incident and her whole monologue about him special, he was feeling a little lightheaded. Normally he would have come up with a reason to excuse himself for a minute or two while he composed himself.

Unfortunately, Mina was already patting the bed next to her and looking at him expectantly. 

Accepting his fate, Izuku dropped down beside her and picked up the textbook once more. He knew from the get go that actually concentrating with her beside him would be next to impossible, but he did his absolute best. 

After all, Mina was counting on him to be an excellent student and get into UA. He wouldn’t let a little thing like the gentle warmth of the girl he adored most in the world seeping into his side distract him, would he?

As the rest of the afternoon proved, yes, he absolutely would.

Read this and other fluffly IzuMina stories on my AO3 or FF.Net accounts! Links available on my Tumblr page, if they get broken again

[team-free-will-oneshots]

Buried Secrets

Title: Buried Secrets (part one) Request: based on one from @witch-of-letters (not sharing it cos spoilers) and  Hello! Can I request something kind of long? Reader notices Dean struggling (barely sleep, self deprecation) and uses witchcraft to help him... - anon (also cut for spoilers) Summary: You’ve been hunting with the Winchesters for years, and unbeknownst to them, you might feel a little more towards them than friendship. Little do they know, you’re a witch. Matters are only complicated with the threat of the Darkness. Will you ever catch a break from what the universe throws at you? (set early-ish season 11) Pairing: Dean x Reader, Sam x Reader (love triangle babey!) Warnings: Some sadness I guess?? Dean repressing his emotions :( Word Count: 2,300ish

note; hey y’all, look at this, another series !! and a love triangle, whoa ! hope u guys enjoy, part two on its way! xx

“Anything?”

“Nothing,” Dean muttered, slamming the old book shut. Dust motes shot into the air, before slowly drifting and settling on the wooden desk, tiny flecks of grey on the brown. He put his head in his hands, groaning before heaving himself to his feet. “Apparently, no one’s ever needed to stop the friggin’ Darkness before. Seriously, what kind of a name is that? The Darkness? Sounds like a shitty 90’s movie,” he protested, but you could sense the pain behind his words, see it lingering behind his eyes.

“There has to be something,” Sam insisted from the corner of the room. The three of you had been poring over lore books for weeks now - you’d even reached out to a few friends from your old coven, desperate for help. None of them offered anything of value - not the few who still deigned to speak with you since your association with the Winchesters, anyway.

Of course, Sam and Dean didn’t know anything about your past life, where you’d embraced your abilities as a natural witch, using them to hunt in your own unique way. As far as they were concerned, you were just a hunter; saving people and hunting things the old fashioned way - with a knife and a gun, not Latin spells and crystals and herbs. When the three of you met on a case, it just made sense to stick around to finish it off. Five years later, you still had their back, and you were certain they had yours.

“There’s nothing, Sam! And why would there be? She was locked away before time even existed, we’re not going to find anything in some stupid book!” Dean snapped, jaw taut and teeth clenched. He seemed more worn down than usual - the deep bags under his eyes seemed to be carved into his skin, his mouth always set in a tense expression of defeat.

Sam sighed, his fingers combing through his hair as he shook his head. The youngest Winchester was struggling too, more than you knew he’d ever admit, but at least his eyes still showed signs of life - a flicker of optimism, even a genuine laugh on occasion. That was far more than what Dean produced of late. It seemed he hadn’t managed to catch a break in years - first the Mark, then being a demon, then the Mark again, and now this… as much as Sam blamed himself for unleashing the Darkness, you knew that Dean blamed himself more.

“You never know. There- there might be something. Maybe we’re just not looking in the right places-” Sam tried helplessly, but fell silent at Dean’s warning glare. You rubbed at your temples, feeling a headache coming on - you’d had all too many of those lately. They’d been bothering you for years, striking up at the most inopportune moments. You’d brushed it off as nothing more than stress, but it certainly didn’t make your life any easier.

When you glanced up, the air was heavy with tension, and you knew it was only a matter of time until Dean snapped.

“Hey. Dean. Let’s go for a walk,” you suggested suddenly, and his eyebrows shot to his hairline.

“You wanna go for a walk? Now?” His tone was weighed with disbelief, and you shrugged.

“Yeah. Like you said, we’re not getting anywhere here. I could do with clearing my head, and I’d like some company.” You shrugged. Dean paused for a moment, processing your reply before nodding.

“Okay. Okay, yeah. Let’s go,” he said, and you smiled, touching his arm lightly as you passed him and ignoring the electricity that sparked at the contact before grabbing your coat and leaving the musty confines of the bunker behind you. Dean was hot on your tail, and you could feel his warm presence behind you as the cool night air rushed over your face, stinging your eyes and rushing through your hair. You blinked a few times, letting your eyes adjust to the darkness before you set off down the road.

Dean fell into step beside you, and for a while, the only sound was that of the crickets and the steady crunch of your footsteps on the crumbling tarmac. The moon bore witness to your outing, it’s faint, silvery light bleeding through the wispy clouds that lazed across the sky.

“Nice night,” Dean remarked, and when you turned to look at him, his jaw had loosened and his shoulders slumped. He wasn’t happy, that much was clear, but at least he wasn’t pushed to his breaking point.

“Yeah,” you agreed. His fingers brushed yours as you walked, warm and calloused. Your heart stuttered, and Dean snatched his hand away, clearing his throat as he awkwardly rubbed the back of his neck. You swallowed, releasing a short breath that misted in the air before getting your emotions under control. It was just an accident. Dean didn’t like you, not like that, at least. The two of you had been best friends for years - you would’ve picked up if… well, if there was anything more than friendship there.

“Maybe we should try finding Rowena again. She might be a backstabbing witch but maybe there’s someone in her circles who-”

“I don’t think the witches can help us,” you interrupted, voice taking on a defensive edge. Dean huffed.

“You’re probably right. Not like they’d be willing to give us anything useful, anyways,” he muttered. Your jaw tightened.

“Maybe not all witches are as bad as you think,” you murmured, and Dean barked a laugh.

“Good one, Y/N,” he chuckled, and your brow creased in hurt as you cast him a stern look.

“I mean it!” you insisted, and Dean rolled his eyes.

“C’mon, Y/N. Most of ‘em made deals with demons. No one ‘good’ resorts to that,” he argued, and you raised an eyebrow as you shot him a pointed look. He rolled his eyes.

“Okay, me doing it was different. These witches… they just want power, and then they use it to hurt people,” he declared, and you sighed.

“Not all of them. Some of them are just… born like that. Natural witches, with powers they have to be taught to control.” Like me, your brain whispered. “There have to be some good ones out there,” you finished, voice small. Dean shrugged.

“Maybe. I’ve never met one, but if I do, I’ll owe you five bucks,” he said, shooting you a smirk. You hummed in response, but the fake amusement you’d tried to imbue in your tone fell flat.

“Well, hunting aside; I thought this walk was to clear our heads. No use talking about things we can’t control,” you said eventually. “How have you been? I heard you up at four am last night. Trouble sleeping?”

Dean laughed humourlessly. “Yeah, well, I’ve got a lot on my mind,” he said vaguely. He opened his mouth to speak, but shut it just as quickly. “It doesn’t matter,” he muttered. You spared a glance at him, and the dullness in his eyes and the weak smile on his lips made your heart weigh heavy with helplessness.

“Well, if you ever wanted to talk about it and… I dunno, get things out of your mind and into someone else's, I’m here,” you told him, keeping your tone light. He chuckled.

“I’ll keep that in mind,” he said, but you knew in your bones that he was lying. Dean was the master of internalising his feelings until they started to eat him up, and you knew this time would be no different.

“I mean it, Dean,” you said, coming to a sudden halt by the roadside. “You’re my best friend. You can talk to me.” Dean’s momentum carried him a few paces further before he finally stopped, turning around and raising his brows.

“I know,” he said, slowly returning to your side. You sighed.

“Really, Dean. Honestly, I-I’m worried about you,” you confessed, and the eldest Winchester rolled his eyes, pinching the bridge of his nose between his thumb and forefinger. He shook his head.

“You sound like Sam,” he muttered. “Listen, I’m fine. And even if I wasn’t, that’s my business,” he said sharply. “You don’t need to be wasting your time worrying about me, of all people! Like I said, I’m-”

“Fine. You’re fine. Right,” you finished defeatedly. He nodded forcefully, shaking his head to clear his thoughts.

“We should get back,” he muttered, avoiding eye contact as he paced back the way he had come, leaving you standing alone in the dark. His movements were stiff and his hands were in fists at his sides. You exhaled heavily, kicking a rock dejectedly before following in his footsteps.

When you returned to the bunker, Dean had already stormed to his room. Sam shot you a quizzical glance. “What’d you do, punch a hole in Baby’s tyre?” Sam asked, and you chuckled, collapsing on the couch next to him.

“Worse. Tried to talk about his feelings,” you replied tightly, massaging your temples and trying to ignore your pounding headache. It had only gotten worse after your attempted “chat” with Dean.

“Ah. Well, that explains it,” he said, trying a smile that you managed to return. Sam’s smiles were always contagious - so genuine and kind, it was impossible not to return them. Sam closed the book in his lap, putting it aside and shifting closer to you. His leg brushed yours, and for the second time that night, your heart stuttered. As attractive as you found Dean, the same could easily be said for Sam. His hand found your knee, resting over it innocently as he coaxed your gaze to meet his. “You okay?” he checked.

You sighed, leaning back into the couch. “Yeah. Yeah, I’m fine, it’s just-” You sighed again. “I’m worried about Dean, and I- I guess I have some stuff going on as well,” you admitted. Sam frowned.

“You wanna talk about it?” he offered, eyes warm with concern. You shook your head - how were you meant to tell one of your hunter best friends that you were one of the “monsters” so frequently on their hit list? How were you even meant to describe how that made you feel, how personal their jabs at witches felt? Especially with how frequently they arose nowadays, ever since Rowena wormed her way into your lives...

“Just… feeling alone, I guess,” you mumbled. “It’s hard to explain.”

“I get it,” Sam said, giving you a sympathetic half-smile. “For a long time, I felt like I didn’t belong… well, anywhere. But, Y/N… Dean and I care about you, okay? I know neither of us really talk about it that much, but… we’re both here for you, and we’ll accept you no matter what. But you need to accept yourself, too.”

You managed a small smile in return. “Thanks, Sam,” you whispered, swallowing hard and blinking back the tears beginning to burn your eyes. When one finally broke free, gliding down your cheek and settling in the corner of your mouth, Sam opened his arms.

“C’mere,” he said, and you accepted his hug gratefully. His arms caged around you protectively, holding you against his hard chest as his large body curled over yours. You could smell the fresh scent of detergent on his flannel, feel his light scruff on your forehead, and then it was fading as you pulled back in fear he’d feel your racing heart.

“I should get to bed,” you told him, smiling again, a fraction more authentic this time. Sam nodded.

“Yeah, me too. See you in the morning,” he said quietly, and you nodded.

“Night,” you replied, getting to your feet and making the short trip back to your room. Sam’s words still echoed in your ears -  you need to accept yourself, too.

Maybe he was right - maybe you’d been trying to suppress who you were for too long. You knew you could use your powers for good - you’d spent most of your life trying to do just that. Maybe you could show the boys, your best friends, that not all witches were as evil as they thought. And maybe, you could start by helping Dean.

You had all the ingredients you needed stowed safely in your bedside drawer, and it took you nearly no time at all to make the hex bag. Your fingers deftly pieced it together, falling back into an old, familiar rhythm as the repetitive motions drew out the stress knotted between your shoulder blades and the tension headache that had tortured you so incessantly. As you imbued your magic into the tiny bag, you felt as though you could finally breathe again.

The sound of a door falling shut drew you from your trance, and you cracked open your own door to peek into the corridor. Dean was heading towards the bathroom, probably for a shower, judging by the towel slung over his shoulder. Perfect.

Once he was out of sight and you heard the spray of water, you crept from your room and into his. Your heart dropped at the sight - it didn’t look like he’d cleaned up in weeks. This was not the room of the healthy minded.

You stayed just long enough to tuck the hex bag under his mattress, leaving as quickly and silently as you came. A small smile tugged your lips as you laid back in bed, drawing the blankets up over your waist. Finally, after so long, you could use your powers for something good.

Maybe there was hope for you yet.

__________

Read part two here!

Forever tags: @babygirloreo @calaofnoldor @stealingheartsswift13 @lmpala97 @sebastianshoe @81mysteriouslyme @castieliswatchingoverme

Dean tags: @polina-93 @justagirlinafandomworld

Sam tags: @sammys-dimpless

If you’d like to be tagged in this series, or added to any of my tag lists, let me know!

[diaryofomellas]

[Fanfiction] An Arrow in Her Quiver - Chapter Two

Summary:

I almost died fighting the Burning Legion. By the end of that cruel war to save Azeroth, the Horde had a new Warchief. I was well on my way to be accepted into her inner circle, and I was not going to break her trust. We do what we must. I pledged my life to Sylvanas Windrunner. I am just an arrow in her quiver.

Read in Ao3

The blazing desert sun scorched the bustling streets of Orgrimmar. The great tan banners that hung high over the city provided some shelter and shade. Yet, I doubted I would ever get used to the dry, hot weather of Durotar. 

Many were still mourning the loss of their loved ones to the Burning Legion, but life was starting to return to normal. The street vendors haggled with their customers. Children running after each other provided the much-needed sound of laughter. Most of all, everyone was preparing to watch the Warchief's victory march through the city later that day.

Grommash Hold towered over the Valley of Strength with its big Horde banner hanging above the spiky doorway. I smoothed my brown leather vest with my hands and squared my shoulders before entering. I was eager to see her again, but being summoned by the Warchief was always a big deal. My anxious little heart raced in my chest.

She stood by the warchief throne, tall and mighty, talking in a low voice with an orc warrior. She dismissed him as I approached her.

"My Queen." I knelt in front of her and lowered my gaze to the ground.

"Ah, Omellas. I have been expecting you." Sylvanas turned towards me. "Please, follow me. Let us talk in the back room."

The small chamber behind the throne room meant to give the warchief some comfort and privacy. I followed her in and clasped my hands behind my back, waiting for her to talk first. She wore her distinctive burgundy armour but was unarmed. On a table to the left, there was a map of Azeroth and a few scattered handwritten papers. On top of those, sat her bony bow and her quiver.

"Omellas Bloodforged." she started, emphasizing my surname. "I like the name you have chosen. It fits you." 

"Thank you, my Queen."

For a moment, there was a hint of a smile playing on her lips. Omellas Silverspirit was my birth name, the surname given to me by my father. That is how Sylvanas had known me before.

When I was lying on the cold stone floor of that cliff on the Broken Shore, I was sure that's where I would die. I remembered Sylvanas standing next to me, fighting off fel demons like she was possessed until someone took me away to a healer. That memory was so hazy that I never knew if it was real or a mere fever dream. I did not dare to ask. 

I had woken up three days later, barely able to breathe with my entire torso bandaged. The recovery process was long and painful; it felt as if I had been reborn and was learning how to live again. It felt like I had a new life, forged from the blood I had spilt against my enemies.

"I trust you are fully recovered from your wound?"

No, I thought. Her question came as a surprise. After all, Sylvanas Windrunner didn't show concern for the well-being of others very often. Yet, I did not want her to perceive me as weak. I did not want her to know that sometimes the pain beneath my right shoulder blade almost brought me to tears. I could never admit that to her. Healers had told me it was something I would have to live with, that it would probably never go away. I had to push through the pain during my training because I could not be seen as someone weak. I am not weak.

"Yes, my Queen," I replied instead. "I heard you called a healer for me. You saved my life. I am thankful for your concern, my Queen."

For a moment, she was silent, looking through me towards a troubled past. Then she collected herself again, and her gaze fell on me. "You have also saved my life that day. You have shown great loyalty towards me."

As a member and soldier of the Horde, I was only doing my job. I did not expect to receive any kind of gratitude afterwards. And it wasn't like Sylvanas to show appreciation so explicitly. Somehow, it made me uncomfortable, worried where this conversation might go from here. "Now that I am Warchief," she continued, watching me closely, "I will need your help more than ever. We have peace, but I sense there are dark times ahead of us."

There it was. The way she uttered that last sentence sounded more like a certainty than a feeling. I knew her well enough to realize she already had plenty of plans running wild through her mind. I could almost see the cogs in her brain turning, sizing me up, wondering if I'd be up to the tasks she had in store for me. I am not weak. "I am an arrow in your quiver, my Queen." I bowed my head and lowered my eyes for a moment. Still mulling over her words, my heart felt heavier with the weight of that ominous prophecy.

With her finger on my chin, she lifted my head to make me raise my gaze. The embroidered hood cast a slight shadow over her face. I could not help but notice how beautiful and dark she was, like a brewing storm. Her expression was amiable, but her eyes pierced through me like a blade. "I trust you."

Any master strategist like Sylvanas Windrunner knows that the first rule of winning at life is not to give out their trust lightly. Asserting her confidence in me sounded more like a warning than an achievement. One does not simply break Sylvanas Windrunner's trust and live to tell the tale. "I shall not disappoint you," I replied, hoping she would understand the promise in my eyes.

I meant it, and she knew it. Her hand moved to my shoulder when she adopted a more relaxed posture. "Will you ride with me today, Omellas?"

My mouth opened up on its own to show the full extent of my surprise. "That would be an honour, my Queen!"

She paused, noticing familiar footsteps approaching. She stepped back as the tanned hide was drawn aside to let Nathanos Blightcaller enter. Then she nodded at me, and I knew that meant I was dismissed. Whatever Nathanos had to say, was not intended for my ears.

"You are late." She told him, as I stepped out into the throne room.

I found Romma waiting for me outside Grommash Hold, eyes wide with anticipation. "So? What did she want?"

I rubbed my neck for a second, my irregular heartbeat drumming on the skin under my fingertips. "Girl, you are not going to believe this."

I told her all about my conversation with Sylvanas while we walked towards the stable. When we arrived, I signalled Kazosh with my head, who quickly fetched my horse for me.

I kissed Wildgaze's forehead and took the reins from Kazosh. "Omellas, I think you're on your way to being accepted into the inner circle!" Romma said, stroking Wildgaze's black mane. "You're a big deal now!"

"Oh, please, I've always been a big deal!" I flicked my hair in fake affectation. My eyes met hers, and we just laughed together.

After the devastating war, laughing felt almost wrong, as if we were mocking those who died so that we could live. At the same time, it was satisfying and freeing. There were tough moments in the last few months when hope for victory was almost lost. But victory had been ours, in the end. Now the focus was on rebuilding our lives and ourselves.

"Hey, Romma, why don't you bring Zona and join me in the march?" Kazosh glanced at me, his eyebrow raising as if he was questioning my judgement. I pretended not to notice.

"I'm not sure Lady Sylvanas would be too pleased with that. She did not invite me." She stuck her tongue out, and I pulled a funny face at her.

"I'll ask her. Everyone else will also join eventually, does it truly matter if you're at the front or the rear?" I knew it mattered, but I didn't want to ride alone. I would feel too self-conscious without someone to talk to while we paraded ourselves through the streets of Orgrimmar. 

"Fine, I'll get her. Meet you at the gates in five." She turned around and walked away, her blue dress waving around her ankles.

Chains dangled from the high ceiling framing the tall Horde banners hanging on the walls. At the Gates of Orgrimmar, groups of blood elves and Forsaken waited for the Warchief to arrive. Everyone was wearing their best clothes. A Forsaken girl in a pretty green dress approached, holding the reins of two skeletal horses. My heart gave a slight jolt of excitement, knowing those were for Sylvanas and Nathanos.

"It's stupid how anxious I am," I whispered to Romma. In the past, I had fought swarms of mindless undead, fel demons, and more scary beasts and monsters than I could count. But I was nervous about riding behind my Warchief through a crowd of joyous supporters.

"Can't judge you, she's a bit... scary." Romma scratched her wolf's chin, who was almost purring with satisfaction.

"That's not why I'm anxious." I countered, crossing my arms on my chest. "And she's not scary!". I hesitated. "She's just... You know. Intense."

A sly smile appeared on Romma's lips. "Sounds like someone has a crush..." she said in a sing-songy tone with a mischievous look.

I glanced behind me to make sure no one was standing within earshot. "Woman, you are out of your mind," I told her. She just smiled without saying another word.

Suddenly, I noticed a wave of murmurs drifting through the crowd. Sylvanas and Nathanos were approaching, walking up the path from Grommash Hold. Adopting a confident posture, I waited by her horse with a modest smile.

"I am glad to see you here, Omellas." She glanced behind me at Wildgaze. Noticing the flag fastened to his saddle, she smirked. "Is that your horse?"

"Yes, my Queen. His name is Wildgaze."

She walked up to him, looking interested. "Strong body, agile legs. Doesn't seem to be skittish. Beautiful shiny coat," she slid her hand through his black forehead and muzzle. "It's a great specimen." 

I took a few sugar cubes from a small pouch strapped to my belt. She picked them up from my hand and offered them to Wildgaze, who gulped everything down happily. "I like the flag on his saddle."

I smiled, a sudden warmth spreading through my chest. "I borrowed it from Kazosh, at the stable. Thought you might enjoy the display of Horde spirit."

"My Queen?" Nathanos' voice sent a cold shiver down my spine. I had not heard him approach us, and having him so close to me so suddenly was startling. "We should begin." Sylvanas nodded and walked to her horse.

"Warchief, if I may...?" Sylvanas did not show any displeasure as she looked back at me. I felt encouraged to proceed, pointing towards Romma. "Would it be okay if my friend here accompanied me during the march? I would prefer not to do it alone..." I let my voice trail off, hoping she would notice my discomfort without me having to state it.

"What is your name?" Sylvanas asked, scanning Romma from head to toe.

"I'm Romma Gravewind, Warchief," she replied with a curtsy.

Sylvanas inclined her head slightly to one side. "I have heard great things about you, Romma Gravewind."

She bowed again. "Thank you, Warchief." Romma was dealing with Sylvanas' compliments with a lot more grace than I had.

Sylvanas' powerful gaze fell on me again, pausing to consider her answer. "I will allow it. You can both ride behind me with my guard."

It was my turn to bow, and I couldn't hide a smile. "Thank you, my Queen." 

I noticed a slight frown appearing on Nathanos' face when I addressed Sylvanas as Queen. It was not the first time I saw him disapprove of that, but I ignored it. She was more than just my Warchief. I considered her my Queen, even if I was not a Forsaken, and I would continue to address her as such. 

I turned to Romma with a grin and gave her a thumbs up. She grinned back at me before mounting her grey wolf. 

At the head of the march, Sylvanas mounted her skeletal horse with grace and ease. I knew how much she loathed this kind of demonstration, but she was hiding her annoyance well. She gave Lor'themar Theron and her Forsaken a nod before nudging her horse forward. I took a deep breath and did the same.

[marril96]

Smokescreen

Pairing: Rowena x reader

Summary: Rowena’s attempt at a surprise goes up in flames.

A/N: @angel-e-v-a and @rowenaisfabulous liked a backstory bit I mentioned in my fanfic Fluffs, so I decided to write it. It is not necessary to read that fic to understand this one, though. The two are totally separate.

Editor: @oswinthestrange

You couldn't have been gone for more than an hour. It was a quick run to the post office, a trip you'd made countless times. It was impossible for something to happen, for something to go horribly, terribly wrong in that amount of time. This was a small town. Aside from a few quarrels between neighbors, nothing ever happened here. Nothing sinister. Nothing remarkable.

Or so you'd thought until two minutes ago when the taxi had dropped you off in front of your house.

In front of your house, whose wide-open windows bled smoke like gaping wounds, while firefighters, scattered around your yard like crimson ants, rushed in and out, left and right, a flurry of movement and pounding feet and raised voices.

Heart stopping dead in its tracks, you started running toward it. The smoke, thick, dark, seeped out in gallons. Your house, shiny white, was tinted grey as if someone had wrapped a cloud of mist around it. What happened? How big was the damage? Had someone — a hunter, a demon, an unfriendly witch — attacked Rowena while you were away?

Where was Rowena?

Your blood ran cold, followed by a chilly cascade of shivers sliding down your spine. You looked around frantically, desperate, pleading to every deity you could think of that she was okay, that she was safe and unharmed and far away from danger. Please, you begged. Please, be okay. Please, be okay, Please be okay.

A rush of images flooded your brain. Tossed furniture. Blood-smeared walls. A charred skeleton lying in the middle of the room with a phone on its chest. A lock of hair on the bed, as crimson as blood on the walls, neatly folded, a souvenir of what had gone on. A prize. Pieces of scalp still clinging to it, staining the sheets underneath it.

The smell, as fresh as the day you'd first felt it, flared up your nostrils, burning like acid. The smell of burnt flesh, of death, of everything good forever gone, never to return again. Never to be the same again.

No!

You shook the thoughts away. It hadn't happened again. It couldn't have! Lucifer was dead, rotting in the Empty forever. Hunters, rogue witches, and everything and everyone else Rowena could handle.

Right?

Just as another horrible stream of thoughts flashed in your mind, you saw her. In the corner of the yard, behind a couple of firemen who were discussing something amongst themselves, Rowena stood tall (well, as tall as she could manage at her height) and proud. Her head was held high, lips a firm line that betrayed nothing, face equally blank. No emotion, all business. If the incident affected her (and you were certain it did), she didn't show it. These people, these strangers didn't get to see her weak. They didn't get to see her hurt.

"Rowena!" you called, relief washing over you. She was okay, you told yourself. She was safe. You had nothing to worry about.

She turned to you, and a small flicker of a smile grazed her mouth. "Y/N!"

You headed for the yard, only to be stopped by a firefighter. "Ma'am, you can't go in there," he said in that professional tone cops usually used. Polite, but firm. A tad friendly around the edges for a better effect.

"I live here," you told him. Gesturing to Rowena, you said, "That's my girlfriend over there!"

"Alright," he conceded. "But go no further than the yard. The house has still not been cleared."

You gave a nod and went in. Rowena met you halfway. As soon as you were near her, you threw your arms around her, wrapping her in a tight, bone-crushing hug. She smelled like smoke, but other than that she appeared fine. She stood still as a statue, frozen in place; she let you hold her, let you pull her in and feel her, bask in her presence. She was alive. She was safe. Nothing else mattered.

"Honey, are you okay?" you asked, pulling back and looking her over.

"I'm fine," she said, more tired than distressed.

Her hands were on her stomach, one clasped over the other. On first glance it appeared to be nothing more than a nervous gesture, but as you looked more closely, you could make out dark, reddish markings sprawled over her lower hand.

"What's this?"

Before she could utter a response, your hands were on hers, gently pulling it free to look it over. Aside from a defeated sigh, Rowena made no protests. It was useless to fight you. A losing battle she'd stopped engaging in a long time ago.

The top of her pale hand was red. The stain was sprawled over it like a crimson bruise, deep, dark, painful to even look at, let alone bear. You stared at it, shocked, mouth agape, then your eyes met Rowena's once again and you got a sudden urge to hug her again. No wonder she hadn't hugged you back.

"Its nothing," she said nonchalantly, but you could tell by her expression it was anything but. It hurt. Not only that, it probably reminded her of the last time she'd been burned.

The time when it wasn't just her hand — her entire body had been burned to a crisp.

You shook the unpleasant memories away, willing them to stay in the back of your mind where they belonged. Twice in one day was enough. You didn't need to remember it. You didn't want to remember it. You wished there was a way to erase the horrifying images out of your head for good.

"It's not nothing. You're hurt!" you said. "You need to get that looked at."

"I do not!" Rowena insisted. "It's just a wee burn. I've had worse." She shot you a meaningful look as she said it, a wordless reminder that you were there, that you'd seen it, felt it, smelled it right alongside her. That you'd held her hand and talked to her, even when she couldn't answer, when her throat and mouth hadn't regenerated yet, for hours on end. She'd survived that, and she would survive a mere second degree wound on her hand.

You were about to tell her it didn't matter, that she was still hurt, when one of the firefighters standing nearby said, "We offered to call for an ambulance, but she refused."

"She's good considering the entire kitchen was on fire," the firefighter next to him said. "That, and she wouldn't let us into the house."

You shot Rowena a pointed glare, a (you hoped) perfect replica of her murderous one. She rolled her eyes dramatically.

"Because I'm fine," she said, exasperated. "I had everything under control until these red bampots shows up!"

"Rowena!" you hissed warningly, cheeks flaming with shame. A small smile bloomed up on your mouth, fake but polite. "She didn't mean that. She's in shock."

The firefighters didn't appear convinced, but, with tight smiles and curt nods, they let it go.

Rowena gave another roll of her eyes, equally dramatic as the first one. You swore she had to have practiced them in the mirror.

"What happened?" you asked.

"Just a wee accident."

You looked to the small streaks of smoke still seeping out the windows and back to her. Your eyebrow shot up, suspicious, disbelieving. "A wee accident?"

"Yes!" Rowena exclaimed. She turned her head to the side, suddenly finding the fence interesting. Desperate to avoid your eyes, your suspicion, your accusation. Giving a sigh, she said in a voice that was barely above a whisper, "I was trying to cook."

No way! You had to have heard it wrong. "You were what?"

She glared at you as if you'd just killed her entire family. "I was trying to cook!"

Before you could try to hold it back, a snort escaped you. Then another, and another, and soon your were laughing heartily as if you'd just heard the funniest joke of your life.

Rowena had tried to cook. Not only that, but she'd almost burned the house down while she'd been at it. If someone had told you that, you wouldn't have believed them.

Rowena never cooked. Never. She made potions and tea and various other beverages, but she never, ever cooked. She refused, and you respected that. The restaurant food the two of you ordered was more than excellent. There was no need for either her or you to cook.

As it turned out, there was a reason she never did.

"You're horrible!" she whined, cradling her burned hand to her chest. Her lower lip popped out in a pout. "Laughing at an injured woman."

"Sory," you said in-between fits of laughter. You took a breath, one, two, three deep ones, to regain your composure. "It's just… you never cook."

"I wanted to today," she said petulantly. A bratty little thing she was.

Your bratty little thing. You loved her exactly as she was.

"It was supposed to be a surprise."

You cocked up an eyebrow. "A surprise?"

"Aye." Her cheeks burned red, embarrassed, awkward. Adorable. "I wanted to make your favorite food."

The admission made you melt like an ice sculpture hit by bright, warm sun rays. She wanted to do something nice for you, wanted to surprise you, and had gotten hurt in the process. You couldn't be mad at her for that, couldn't laugh and poke fun. She had nothing but the best intentions at heart.

"You're adorable, you know that?" you said.

Rowena's eyes locked right with yours, defiant. "Am not."

"Are, too," you insisted. "My precious little cupcake."

"Y/N!" she warned, not at all appreciative of the nickname, especially surrounded by strangers.

You grinned. "You are! And I love you for it. So much." You grabbed her healthy hand in both of yours and gave it a squeeze. "But I beg of you, never try to cook again."

"I don't intend to," she said with a scowl.

"Good. One fire was enough."

A snort, and then a chuckle, accompanied your words.

Rowena rolled her eyes. "You will never let me live this down, will you?"

"Nope," you said, popping the p.

"That's what I get for trying to be nice."

"Uh huh. No good deed goes unpunished."

"Rude."

"Always, honey." You pecked her on the cheek, a swift brush of lips over warm, flushed skin. Your eyes trailed down to her injured hand. "You really should get that taken care of."

"I will, when we're allowed back in," Rowena said.

"I volunteer to be your nurse," you said.

She smirked. "Naughty."

"Pervert," you retorted, laughing.

"You started it," she said nonchalantly.

"It's not my fault you sexualize everything," you teased.

"Sure."

"It's not!"

"Keep telling yourself that, dear."

The banter lasted for a good few minutes, until the firefighters announced the house was safe to go back in. The smell of smoke would linger for a while, they warned, and gave a few tips on how to make it go away. You listened intently, even though the advice was useless to you; Rowena already had a spell ready. A few Latin words, and your house would smell as good as new.

And, once you made a call to the restaurant, it would smell like your favorite food.

Tags: @werewolfbarbie @oswinthestrange @songofthecagedmoose @apurdyfulmind @getthesalt-sam @metallihca @salembitchtrials @jay-eris @hellsmother @elizabeth-effie @victoriasagittariablack @rowenaswife @dropsofpetrichor @xfireandsin @liddell-alien @hotdiggitydammit @1-800ahs @darkhumorsblog @wayward-kaia @angel7376 @rowenaisfabulous @ruthieconnells @evil-regal-vampiress @collectorofsecretsandsouls @angel-e-v-a

[pastelpastryblog]

DEAN  scenario- What on earth did I do to deserve this?

Requested: Dean looks like the guy you see at the gas station at 3am after the club that you trynna fuck but you cant tell your friends cause they gonna judge you. Sooo many bad but good decisions. Someone should make a scenario out of that lol. via @icygrrlnat by @otheruponrother I really hope that you like this scenario. It was a bit hard to make but I hope it turned out good for you :)

Word count: 3,473

Genre: Angst,Mature, strong language, suggestive content

*Wednesday*

Its F/N birthday in 2 days but I really don’t want to go out clubbing with her and the other girls. The past 2 months has been very rough for me. Whether it is my personal life and my professional life, both was rough for me, but this week has honestly been the worst of it all. My high school bully, Yucky hyuky…. I mean Kwon Hyuk, has now been appointed as my new supervisor since June and he has been putting me through hell. He always tells me to do the team’s dirty work and he always takes his anger out on me when someone else in our team messes up. All the women at work find him attractive and they all flirt with him. If only they knew him personally. I also feel so depressed lately and Friday and Saturday are my only days off this week, so I want to spend my day in bed, and have my phone switched off because I also don’t want to go out with my co-workers Friday, because they are all going to watch Kwon hyuk perform at an event. I honestly don’t want to be reachable. Like honestly, what on earth did I do to deserve this type of treatment from him. Like, the only bad thing that I have ever done is have a crush on yucky hyuky when I was like what? 16? 17?

My friends never let me live down the fact that I had a crush on a school bully that looks like he bathes in mud. All my friends hate him because he used to bully them too, but not as severe as my bullying. He was known for being the first guy in our grade that lost his virginity, was always fighting the older boys of our school, known for sleeping around with the older girls from different schools and older women from universities. He was also popular for leading on the girls in our grade and giving them false hope. He even had an affair with one of his girlfriend’s mom. There even were rumours of him having an STI or an STD, and him getting a married university lecturer pregnant but those rumours could be fake. But in other words, he was a full-blown hoe, a dirty one. If you were associated with him, you automatically became a dirty hoe by association, so everyone that had morals, tried to stay away from him because he was trouble.

~2 days later, Friday~

It is F/N birthday today and they all pleaded me to come and celebrate F/N 25thbirthday. I really didn’t want to, but then I remembered that she always comes to my birthdays, even when I don’t do anything on my special day she manages to bring me a birthday cake and a present. So technically, I HAD to go out. We pre-drink as we get ready, and we have a pre-party before the turn up at the club. We all dolled up for our girl’s 25th. Everybody looked like they could be in movies, while I opted for a lowkey option, a black strapless pvc bodycon dress, off the shoulder denim jacket, and black barely there heels with a small black clutch bag. I even wore makeup for the first time in months, a light Smokey eye with dark plum lips and I even took my messy bun down and straightened my hair. Basic but cute.

~

It’s 1am right now but we have been in the club since 10pm. Some of the girls are drunk, and some are one more shot away from being completely drunk, like myself. I guess hanging with my girls is like therapy to me. I get to just let loose and have fun, I feel like I deserved this. I deserved to not think about my love life, debts, my bills and my demon supervisor. This club is too lit and so are the people that I am surrounded with, the birthday girl is getting all types of attention because she looks beautiful with her face full of glam makeup and her sparkly dress and her figure 8 body shape. Its so good to see everybody having fun and enjoying themselves. 30 minutes into sitting and sipping our drinks at our VIP booth that we had reserved for the bday girl, the DJ stops the music and announces that an upcoming R&B singer is about to hit the stage so me and my friends head off to the stage to see the show but for some reason I see my co-workers, so I try to hide from them, but they see me and I get approached by them.

“hey Y/N, what are you doing here? I thought you didn’t want to go out “

“Hi, um…. its my friend F/N birthday today so were celebrating here. Why are you guys here? I thought you guys were going to see Hyuk, I mean Mr Kwon perform somewhere. Did you guys not go?”

“LADIES AND GENTLEMEN, UPCOMING R&B SINGER, DEAN” says the DJ.

Oh boy…….

“yeah we ARE here to see Mr Kwon, DEAN is his stage name.”

“Ooh, he’s starting. Bye Y/N see you at work”

“We’ll tell him that you were here, say happy birthday to F/N for me. Bye!”

F U C K.

“Erm, wait. Is that fucking Yucky Hyuky on stage? Says friend #1

“WTF, isn’t that Hyuk? The dirty one from school? Hes trying to be a singer now? Wow” says friend #2

I honestly did not expect to see this beautiful demon slut here. I came out with my girls to have fun, to forget about all the shit that is troubling me. Not for me to hear his angelic voice.

Pause. Did I just call this man beautiful? Angelic voice? Pfft. As if!

Seeing Hyuk on stage was, well… different. He is very charismatic on stage and he looks and sounds like he knows what he’s doing, which is a great thing for him I guess. I don’t know why but seeing him on stage is kind of making me feel some type of way and I really don’t like it. 30 minutes into his performance, while me and my girls standing in front of the stage, I notice that Yucky Hyuky kept looking in my direction, but I kept brushing it off. Maybe he was looking for the other co-workers, maybe he’s trying to identify and remember my girls, maybe he’s thinking of more ways of ruining my work for me tomorrow. No way is he staring at me because he thinks I’m cute. It can’t be. But for some reason, this look was one that I have never seen before. It was a soft yet sexy look. I don’t know, maybe the drinks are hitting my brain right now.

So, at this point, me and the girls split up to do our own thing while still being on the dance floor. I was vibing to hyuk’s music with a drink in my hand, while also ignoring the long stares that he is giving me from across the stage. All of the sudden, I get bumped into. Somebody accidently spills a drink on my dress (thank God, it’s a pvc dress so no damages were made), I turn around and I notice that it is my ex-boyfriend, Juno. I froze, I didn’t know how to react, so he just pulled me by my hand and took me out. He takes me to the unisex bathroom starts wiping the drink that he spilt on my dress.

“I’m so sorry for spilling my drink on you, Y/N. You look beautiful by the way” he says as he looks me up and down while licking his lips.

“why are you doing this to me? And what do you want from me?”

“I’m just trying to get you clean Y/N, I spilt my drink on you. Did you expect me to leave you like that?”

“spilling a drink on me is nothing compared to what you put me through. “

“I just wanted to check up on you, to see how you’re doing”

“You broke my heart, you damn idiot. How do you think I’m fucking doing?”

“look, I’m sorry Y/N. I didn’t mean to hurt you. “

“Save it Juno. You used to cheat on me whenever I wasn’t around, especially when you went on tour. Then you cheated on me with your so called “best friend” Hyorin from college and got her pregnant. Whenever Hyorin did something bad, you would always stick up for her and put the blame on me instead. Whenever I would confront you about it, youy would always say that shes been your friend since day 1, so you had to do what you did. You never had my back. The reason why I am in debt is because of you. You made me feel horrible about myself by body shaming me, always lying to me and you were just verbally and mentally abusive to me. So, what do you mean by saying that you are sorry and that you didn’t mean to hurt me. You are not sorry, and you definitely meant to hurt me. You knew damn well what you were doing, Juno”

“Y/N, look, I’m so- “

“Oh, shut it Juno. You know damn well you don’t mean it. What? You’re Sorry? You didn’t mean to hurt me? Are you fucking kidding me right now? You’re only apologising because I look good tonight. You’re only apologising to me RIGHT NOW because you want to take me home and get in my pants. But guess what Juno? That can never be me. Not anymore. I am not falling for your bs again. You are the worst. Thank you for ruining my night Juno. Have a great life, bitch.” I started to walk off and then I turned around to him again and I say “Oh, I forgot something. Congratulation on your baby by the way, and tell your side bitch, oops, I mean tell your baby moms that I said hi”

I walk out of the bathroom and leave Juno in there, but I notice that Hyuk was standing outside the bathroom, but I don’t care. I don’t care if I’ve missed him performing his last 4 songs. I don’t care if he finished his performance. I don’t care if he heard us.  I don’t care if he thinks that I look stupid right now. In fact, since when did he ever think I was not stupid? I don’t care at all.  I need to get out of this club asap. I head back into the VIP booth and I grab my purse, go to the bar one last time and I get two glasses of henny and a shot of Vodka and I gulp it all down in one go. After that encounter with Juno, I really needed that.  After I finished my drink, I leave without finding my friends anything because I didn’t want my girls to fight Juno. Its F/N special day after all, no need for her day to get ruined by me.

~

I get out of the club and I walked to the nearest gas station so that I could wait for my uber there. I get a notification on my phone and the Uber driver says that he will get to me in 55 minutes. So out of nowhere, tears just start falling down my face. I was having such a good day today but out of nowhere, I see my co-workers from work, hyuk, my ex and now my uber basically cancels on me. How can my life be so messed up? What did I do to deserve this?  

Its been 20 mins and I’m still at the gas station crying. But this time I’m crying, curled up in a ball on the side curb and I took my heels off because they were hurting my feet. Out of nowhere, a car pulls up, but I had no energy to look up. Someone finally opens the car door and yells my name. still crying and still not looking at who the person is, I feel someone’s big, warm hands putting my hands away from my face and I notice that the person is Hyuk. He then goes inside the gas station store and comes out with a packet of tissue paper that he just purchased. He approaches me and doesn’t say anything. He just wipes away my tears with the tissue paper and out of nowhere he picks me up and puts me in the passenger seat of his car. We get in the car and he covered my legs with his jacket and places the packet of tissues that he bought for me on my lap. The car ride was not silent at all, because all I did was cry and sniffle. I cried so hard that I ended up falling asleep during the other half of the car ride.

I wake up when I feel Hyuk placing me on something and covers me with something warm and fluffy. I get up and I see that I am in a clean yet modern studio apartment.

“where am I?” I ask.

“you’re at my house, so don’t worry. But are you okay?” he asks me as he is taking pillows and comforters out of his wardrobe and placing them on his sofa.

“I’m a bit dizzy and I have a pounding headache. I feel a bit nauseous too, I think I’m going to vomit. Are you moving the bed?” I say as I sit up from his bed as I place my arms around my stomach.

“No matter how hard a situation is, you should never drink that much for you to be feeling the way you feel right now. How much did you even drink?”

“A lot”

“that’s very irresponsible of you, Y/N”

He quickly runs into his kitchen and gets me a bottle of cold water and some pills for me to take, while he got himself a Jack Daniels bottle.

“here, take it”

*giggles* “thanks” *giggles.

“Don’t ever drink like that again and wonder off yourself. what if a creepy man was to put you in his car instead? Do you know how dangerous that could have been?

“Wait. Since when did you ever care about my wellbeing, Mr Kwon? And why do you look so sexy tonight?”

“Since forever. Huh, wait what? Did you just call me sexy?”

“huh? What the fuck?” I chuckled as he looked at me.

“Look, when I was on stage performing, I was so shocked to see you in the crowd. I was not expecting to see you because you told all of us at work that you had other plans.”

“Great, this whole situation is going to get me in trouble on Monday isn’t it? I’m getting fired” I sigh.

“No Y/N, when I was performing I kept staring at you because you looked beautiful today. In fact you look beautiful every day and – “

“Look Yucky Hyuky, you still are the same, aren’t you? Are you saying all of this just to get my hopes up and laugh at me at the end? You used to do that to all the girls in our grade. I had a crush on you for like 2 years but thank goodness I didn’t confess to you or you would have embarrassed me in school”

“Y/N, did you just say that you used to like me?

“I used to but then I hated you but seeing you on stage kind of changed my hate for you. It kind of made me have a crush on you again”

“Y/N, I think its time for you to go to bed, you’re still drunk”

“No, I really mean it, Yucky. I was the ONLY girl that you never asked out as a joke or led me on. That made me feel really weird and top of that, you used to bully me for no reason!”

“the truth is that I have always had a crush on you. I have always had a crush on you, Y/N.Infact, I still do. I made you feel that way because I thought that you would never ever like me and you are just to good for me. You made me want to be a better person so that I could finally approach you, but I was unconfident and scared of being rejected by you and that is why I started to sleep around with a lot of girls, it was to get my mind off of you, but it never worked. You have always been on my mind. When you joined the company, I was really excited to see you and I wanted to show you an upgraded version of myself, but you didn’t like me from jump which is totally understandable for the way I have treated you in the past. My immaturity got in the way, and I messed up again. I am really sorry for making you feel worthless and miserable. This information may not fix what has happened between us, but I just really wanted to get this off of my chest. I really hope that you can forgive me.”

“Wow, I don’t know what to say”

After hearing all of this, I honestly know how to react. Like should I be happy? Should I cry? Be angry at him? Like what should I do?

So, I ended up getting out of the bed and walked past him on his sofa so that I could go into the kitchen and throw my water bottle in his recycling trash.

While you were in the kitchen recycling Hyuk’s bottle, Hyuk had just finished his bottle of Jack Daniels. After hearing your confession to him, he really wanted to get another bottle in the kitchen. You finally finish sorting out his other bottles, so you start walking back to the bed, Hyuk was walking towards the kitchen to get himself another bottle. Without looking were you are both walking, you both bump into each other pretty hard, so hard that you tripped, and he caught you in his arms.

While still being in this awkward position, Hyuk would not let go of me. He was looking into my eyes and he was giving me the same look that he was giving me at the club. I honestly don’t know what it is about that look, but it drove me crazy. So crazy that I got closer to his face and kissed him on his lips. His lips were very plump but also tasted bitter because of him drinking the Jack Daniels earlier on. He kissed me back and out of nowhere we were making out in the middle of his studio apartment.

You and Hyuk both started to get carried away while making out and before you knew it your hands started to wander on his body. You started to unbutton his silk shirt, while he was taking off your jacket, your hands caressing his chest while he unzips your dress. Both just left in your underwear, Hyuk pushes you on the bed while still making out and says “we don’t have to do this Y/N. I’ll fuck you if you let me”. You nodded in agreement to what he said to you and you proceeded to let him do what you wanted him to do to you.

~ 8 hours later~

“Morning, Y/N”

“morning Yucky-“

“Okay, can you quit calling me Yucky Hyuky now? All of those rumours of me having STD’s and STI’s are fake. Same goes to the one about me having multiple babies by older or any woman at all.”

“I am so sorry, I’m just so used to calling you that. I didn’t mean to hurt you by that”

“its fine Y/N. Look, I’ve been thinking. Do you want to go out on a date with me? I want to make you my girlfriend”

“Yeah sure, I would love to go out on a date with you. “

I ended up going on a few dates with Hyuk and me and him ended up becoming boyfriend and girlfriend after 2 months of dating. I was ashamed of telling my friends because they all hated him and because of all of the things that he has done but because he became my boyfriend, I can’t hide him. I ended up telling my friends about everything and for some reason, they reacted more positively but it took them a few months to fully approve of Hyuk. Mine and Hyuk’s relationship improved throughout the months and my friends were always supportive of me too. Honestly, what on earth did I do to deserve this?

The end.

[1-800-hellboi]

TOP lyrics

favorite twenty one pilots lyrics from each song.

“I mean no disrespect, I am very perplexed by your ways. Why won’t you let us use your name?” - Implicit Demand For Proof

“But believe me, I’m fine. But I’m lying. I’m so very far from fine.” -Fall Away

“The end can’t come soon enough but is it too soon?” -The Pantaloon

“My trial was filed as a crazy suicidal head case but you specialize in dying, you hear me screaming ‘father.’” -Addict With A Pen

“Would you let me know your plans tonight? Cos I just won’t let go until we both see the light.” -Friend Please

“Take it up, seal the door. I don’t want to march here anymore.” -March To The Sea

“Get up, cos the world has left you lying on the ground.” -Johnny Boy

“Your shaking shoulders prove that it’s colder inside your head, than the winter of dead.” -Oh Ms Believer

“You’ve stolen my air catcher and I don’t know if I want it back.” -Air Catcher

“Everyone gather around for a show. Watch as this man disappears as we know.” -Trapdoor

“I began to understand why God died.” -A Car, A Torch, A Death

“Sometimes we will die and sometimes we will fly away.” -Taxi Cab

“You’re in my mind.” -Before You Start Your Day

“Your soul knows good and evil, your soul knows both sides and it’s time you pick your battle, and I promise you this is mine.” -Isle of Flightless Birds.

“We’re going too fast, save us.” -Slowtown.

“I don’t want to be heard, I want to be listened to.” -Forest.

“But do I want to say goodbye to all the glowing eyes.” -Glowing Eyes.

“Go away, leave me alone. Don’t leave me alone.” -Kitchen Sink.

“Haven’t you taken enough from me? Won’t you torture someone else’s sleep?” -Anathema

“I hear a second voice behind your tongue somehow. Luckily I can read your mind. Flies and cobwebs unwind. They will not take you down… I will make you believe you are lovely.” -Lovely.

“You’re an angel fallen down, won’t you tell us of the clouds. You have fallen from the sky, how high?” -Ruby

“I don’t believe my ears and I’m scared of my own head.” -Be Concerned.

“Let me know when you’ve had enough.” -Clear.

“I’ll stay awake 'cause the dark’s not taking prisoners tonight.” -Ode to Sleep

“It ain’t the speakers that bump hard, It’s our hearts that make the beat.” -Holding On To You

“Sometimes to stay alive you gotta kill your mind.” -Migraine

“I will make you queen of everything you see. I’ll put you on the map and cure you of disease.” -House Of Gold

“Sometimes quiet is violent.” -Car Radio

“I’m never what I like.” - Semi-Automatic

“While you’re doing fine, there’s some people and I who have a really tough time getting through this life, So excuse us while we sing to the sky.” -Screen

“Don’t wanna give you all my demons. You’ll have to watch me struggle from several rooms away but tonight, I’ll need you to stay.” -The Run and Go

“You say I’m not alone, but I am petrified.” -Fake You Out

“It shows where your mind has gone. And you swearing to your parents that it will never happen again I know what that means.” -Guns For Hands

“I know where you stand, silent in the trees.” -Trees

“Stay alive for me. You will die but now your life is free. Take pride in what is sure to die.” -Truce

“Death inspires me like a dog inspires a rabbit.” -Heavydirtysoul

“Wish we good turn back time to the good old days.” -Stressed Out

“I’m falling so I’m taking my time on my ride.” -Ride

“What I want to save I’ll kill.” -Fairly Local

“My heart is my armour. She’s the tear in my heart, she’s a carver. She’s a butcher with a smile, cut me farther than I’ve ever been.” -Tear in My Heart

“Don’t trust a perfect person and don’t trust a song that’s flawless.” -Lane Boy

“I know my soul’s freezing. Hell’s hot for good reason.” -The Judge

“Don’t forget about me. Even when I doubt you, I’m no good without you.” -Doubt

“Domingo en fuego, I think I lost my halo. I don’t know where you are, I need you to come and find me.” -Polarize

“And what we want we know we can’t believe. We have all learned to kill our dreams.” -We Don’t Believe What’s on TV

“You don’t know my brain the way you know my name. You don’t know my heart the way you know my face. You don’t know what I’ve done.” -Message Man

“A shadow tilts its head at me. Spirits in the dark are waiting. I won’t let them win, go quietly.” -Hometown

“I’m out of my mind. I’m not seeing things right. I waste all this time trying to run from you. I’m out of my mind.” -Not Today.

“Though I’m weak, and beaten down, I’ll slip away into this sound. The voice of you is close to me, I’m inside out, you’re underneath. Don’t let me be gone.” -Goner

“Please don’t make any sudden moves. You don’t know the half of the abuse.” -Heathens

“If you need anyone, I’ll stop my plans, but you’ll have to tie me down and then break both my hands.” -Jumpsuit

“I got back what I once bought back in the slot I won’t need to replace.” -Levitate

“Lights they blink to me, transmitting things to me. Ones and zeroes, ergo this symphony. Anybody listening? Ones and zeroes. Count to infinity, ones and zeroes.” -Morph

“Stay with me, my blood, you don’t need to run.” -My Blood.

“When I leave don’t save my seat, I’ll be back when it’s all complete.” -Chlorine

“Someone stepping towards you, can’t describe just what I’m feeling. For you, I’d go write a slick song just to show you the world.” -Smithereens.

“Promise me this, if I lose to myself, you won’t mourn a day and you’ll move on to someone else.” -Neon Gravestones.

“I don’t know which way I’m going, but I can hear my way around.” -The Hype

“When Bishops come together they will know that Dema don’t control us.” -Nico and the Niners

“Though I am bruised, face of contusions, know I’ll keep moving.” -Cut my Lip

“This is the sound we make. When in between two places where we used to bleed and where our blood needs to be.” -Bandito

“I can feel the pressure start to possess my mind.” -Pet Cheetah

“Then the day it happened, I recorded this last bit. I look forward to having lunch with you again.” -Legend.

“In time, I will leave the city. For now, I will stay alive.” -Leave the City.

[hairringtonsteve]

it hurts.

(jonathan byers x reader) 

requests: 

i just looked at the “ _ me” prompts and they look super cool. could u do a call me prompt with either steve or jonathan? if u could include someone being on the brink of death that would be amazing!!!

could you do a drabble for Jonathan Byers and the reader based of the “call me” prompt??

kill me with jonathan from stranger things pls! i love hurting my children

summary: um, well. ya’ll asked for angst, and here it is. i can’t think of a summary for this one other than jonathan cries.

word count: 1,975

a/n: okay, so there is definite gore in this one. i get a bit descriptive, so if you’ve got a queasy stomach and can’t handle demogorgon attacks, please be aware of ths. also, some major spoilers from season 2, episode 8. 

“You do get that liking Should I Stay Or Should I Go doesn’t mean that you have better taste in music than most people, right?”

Jonathan whipped his head over to you, eyes wide as you lounged on his bed. He stared at you for a moment, taking in your cheeky grin before rolling his eyes.

“Would you just shut up?”

“What? You keep acting like you liking The Clash makes you superior to anybody else. They play it on the radio. It’s like saying that you liked Bowie before anybody else. It’s like, fake pretentiousness.” Jonathan let out a snort at your words, making his way from his desk to you. He paused in front of his bed, quirking his brow.

“So are you gonna move, or am I too pretentious to lay on my bed?”

You let out a thoughtful hum, putting a finger to your cheek as though you were really contemplating it. It was difficult to bite back your grin, the corners of your lips twitching as they ached to be free to smile as much as they wanted to.

“Definitely too pretentious.”

At that, Jonathan promptly shoved you over, eliciting a shriek from you as he climbed in next to you, wrapping an arm around your waist.

“I mean, I kind of like you pretentious, though. You’re cute when you think you have better music taste than me.”

His cheeks burned at your words, which made your chest warm. It was funny, really. You’d been dating for a couple of months by then, but any time you complimented him, it was the same reaction - flustered. Which you didn’t mind one bit. It was cute to see him get all shy, ducking his head as he mumbled something about you being cute under his breath. The words made you grin even wider.

He shifted you around on his bed, turning you on your side so that way you were lying right next to him, your head against the crook of his shoulder. He placed a small kiss on your head, pulling you closer to him.

“I guess you’re cute too,” he murmured. You could tell without even looking up at him that he was trying not to laugh. “Even though your taste in music is utter shit.”

Things had gone from bad to worse to utter fucking shit show.

Nancy and Jonathan had explained to you their plan, and you wholeheartedly agreed to it. At first, all three of you were supposed to go. But the more you thought about it, the more it made sense that someone stay behind and keep an eye on Will. You had arrived to Hawkins just after everything had gone down the year before, and while you’d eventually been filled in on the happenings, Jonathan still knew more about it than you. And sure, Mrs. Byers and Chief Hopper were around - as was the rest of Will’s friends - but Jonathan trusted you more than just about anyone. So it was decided.

You would stay behind.

You’d tagged along to the lab with the group. Slowly but surely, things had started going downhill. And then out of nowhere, you were suddenly locked in your own hellish nightmare. There were those weird demo-somethings running through the building. Red lights were flashing as the screams of the scientists filled the air.

And there was blood. A lot of blood.

Weirdly enough, Bob Newby had been the one to brave the demonic beasts, and you had decided to go along with him. You were sick to your stomach at the thought of going out there, but you’d grown up on a farm, learning how to handle a gun when you were six. You could do this.

All had gone well at first, Bob turning the system back on and the two of you almost making it scott-free.

From that point on, everything you remembered, you remembered in flashes.

Bob Newby’s terrified face as you stood opposite him in the closet, the monster outside the door.

The two of you exiting the door, and then a clang.

Running. A lot of running.

Flashing, fluorescent lights.

Doors and doors and more doors.

Mrs. Byers smiling at the two of you.

A scream.

Blood.

Pain.

“Come on! Get in!” The words had left Jonathan’s mouth the second he saw people. His gaze flickered over the group, relief starting to pour in. There was his mom, his brother, Mike, Hop-

“Y/N?”

He saw you,Hopper pulling your unconscious body with him as he tried to hustle his mom out at the same time. There was blood all over your clothes, the shredded fabric hanging by a literal thread. It was like time had stopped for him, everything operating in slow motion. His heart stopped. His head stopped. Every single thing stopped as he honed in on you.

“Jonathan, go!” Nancy yelled, breaking him from his trance. Time sped up once more, and his brain turned back on. It was almost overwhelming, the screaming from Mike as they closed the door, Joyce’s muffled sobs into her hands.

Very softly, he could hear it as he started to speed down the road; your moans and whimpers, soft cries leaving your lips with every bump of the road.

When everyone got to the Byers house, it seemed to go downhill fast. Jonathan was in full panic mode, unable to function as he put his car into park. Hopper was taking over, snapping at Mike and Steve to get Will out of the car while he gently carried you towards the door. You’d passed out by then, the pain getting too much for you to handle.

After a couple of seconds of attempting to gather his thoughts, Jonathan made it into the house, immediately walking towards Hopper.

“We need to get Y/N to the hospital,” he said, his voice cracking as he glanced over to where the police chief had laid you on the couch.

“We’ve got bigger things to deal with, kid. Can’t go to the hospital. Not now.” He was looking anywhere but in Jonathan’s direction, which made the young man’s blood boil.

“Are you kidding me? Do you see - Y/N is going to die if we don’t leave right now.” Jonathan knew, deep down, that Hopper was right. There were demodogs to deal with, the Upside Down’s impending doom, and Will’s safety was in question.

“Jonathan? Where’s Jonathan? Is he - is he here?” Your voice sounded out all of a sudden, terrified and weak, startling Jonathan from his conversation with Hopper. He darted over to you, practically mowing down Lucas in the process.

“Y/N? Hey, I’m here,” he murmured, crouching down next to the couch. He let his fingers brush through your hair gently, his heart breaking in half as he looked down at you. Closer up, the damage was much worse. It was difficult to tell with the blood, but there were deep bite marks down your side. The redheaded girl - Max, he thought her name was? - came out with a first aid kit and some washcloths.

A brief flicker of fear shot through Jonathan, that the first aid kit wouldn’t do anything for her.

“It hurts,” you whimpered, your lower lip trembling. He let out a hum of acknowledgement, finger brushing a line down your face.

“We’re going to get you cleaned up, alright? You just gotta trust me? It’s going to hurt, but we’ll do it fast, okay?”

You didn’t respond to his words, instead letting out a quiet moan as you tried to move.

Jonathan glanced over to Hopper, who was watching him carefully.

“Use the antiseptic wipes, then pour some alcohol on it, bandage it up real nice. You just got to make sure it stops the bleeding ‘til we can make it to the hospital,” Hopper told him, his gaze shifting from the oldest Byers boy to the mother of the family. “You can do this, kid.”

Jonathan followed his directions, his stomach twisting the entire time. With a careful hand, he moved the fabric out of the way, making sure that he didn’t bump you or move you in any way while he did so. Your breathing stayed shallow but steady, your eyelids fluttering shut as he got the first wipe.

“No, c’mon, you gotta stay awake, babe. Come on, you can do this,” he said, his voice soft as it cracked against the nickname that he’d used with you for the last nine months. He brushed the wipe against your skin as gentle as he could, but even the lightest touch wouldn’t have saved you from the pain that erupted across your nerve endings. You arched your back, screaming as you tried to jerk away from him. But that hurt too, even worse than when he’d used the wipe. “Steve, get over here! Hold her down.”

It was harder for you to twist away with Steve Harrington holding your shoulders down, but it was manageable. Jonathan had thought that he was going to vomit with every wipe of the antiseptic, unable to cope with causing you that much pain. But when he got most of the blood cleaned off, what remained was horrifying. Row after row of teeth marks littered your side, with smaller chunks ripped out of the skin. His head jerked as he swallowed back the bile that had risen up his throat, sudden and unexpected. His hands shook, hovering above you as he froze.

“Come on, man. We gotta finish this,” Steve said, his voice firm. Jonathan looked up to the one person that had somehow come through for him against the demogorgon a year ago, and was somehow coming through for him again. “You ever hear of bleeding out, man? Hurry the fuck up,” he snapped.

It was those words, and his tone, that jerked Jonathan from his stupor. He looked down at your body, watching as the blood slow but steady was coming out. Your skin was growing more and more pale, and the terror gripped his heart once more. But he pushed through, grabbing the medical wrap and motioning for Steve to lift you up. You groaned, unable to scream with your strength gone. Jonathan started to wrap it around your side, keeping it tight enough to stop the bleeding.

There was whimpering on your part, letting out the occasional, quiet cry whenever the tape would scrape up against you in literally any way, shape, or form. By the time that he came to the end of the wrap, Max was there, waiting with the tape to keep it all together. Steve laid you back down on the couch, and Jonathan waited for that sigh of relief.

But there was none.

Your face was scrunched up, mouth open as though you were trying to form words.

“Still hurts,” you murmured, your eyes slipping shut. Despite the bandages helping to stop the bleeding, your face was still pale. Too pale, really. “Wanna sleep, Jon’than.” Your words were slurring a little as you tried to open your eyes. Jonathan’s face hovered above yours, a look of pure worry on it. “Don’t be scared, babe. ‘M okay.”

“I know you are.” His words came out weak and watery, his throat thick with unshed tears. He needed to be strong for you, and his mom, and Will. “You’re going to be okay.”

“‘S warm, babe. And nice.”

There was a pit in his stomach as your eyes drifted shut once more. He laid a hand on your cheek, a tear slipping out of the corner of his eye.

“Y/N, you gotta stay awake. Open your eyes for me, please.”

“‘M just gonna sleep for a second,” you murmured, your voice drifting farther off.

“Y/N?” There was a pause. “Y/N?”

[mormonbatmanlover]

What Should Never Be

Stanley Pines was holed up in a decaying motel room. He had hustled a local gang out of three grand for a robbery that was never carried through.

 That would've been enough reason to kill him. If only he had stopped there. He had sold Rico Alcatraz, notorious kingpin, explosives that were nothing but cardboard tubes filled with sand, painted red and tied together with cheap wiring. 

 If only he could see the look on the gangsters’ faces as they tried to detonate the “bombs.” It would almost be worth having one of the most dangerous criminals in both Americas calling for his head. Almost.

 It reminded him of the time he posed as a stockbroker and convinced a crowd to invest in his fictitious company. Even the most naive would’ve raised an eyebrow once they heard that it was named StanCo. Some people were too darn easy to swindle. 

Though to them, he was Hal Forrester, all around honest guy. Stan Pines hadn’t existed for over nine years. Why should they be suspicious?

 A harsh knock on the door snapped him out of the reverie. Grabbing the bat by the side of his bed, he swore that the money would be repaid in full. A lie, obviously, but they didn't need to know that.

 A piece of paper fell through the mail slot. Stan didn’t know what to expect. An invitation to test his fighting skills against the toughest member of the gang?

 It was a postcard from some Podunk town in Oregon. On the back, his brother had written in a shaky hand: Please Come. -Ford

 Ford was in trouble. Real trouble. Trouble that was bad enough that he would turn to Stan after a decade of estrangement. Stan wasn’t sure if that was a relief or cause for alarm.

 Waving away his rising anxiety, he tossed his meager possessions into a bag.  It was time for him to get out of New Mexico anyway. There was nothing for him here.

 Maybe Stan could finally get a chance to make things right. Help Ford with whatever was making him act this desperate, take him somewhere nice and tropical, become a dynamic duo again. It’d be a piece of cake.

 “No, it won’t.” said an internal voice. His father’s voice. “If Ford has any sense, he’ll leave you again, and never look back. You’re a disgrace. Never cared about anyone but yourself.”

 Thoughts like these nagged at him as he drove through Arizona, Utah, and into Idaho. (He tried to stick to the desert and back roads. Even though it took longer, it was much safer than driving through large cities and risk getting arrested.)

 Something in him finally snapped.  He was done being seen as selfish, as a freeloader.

 Stan cared. He cared about Ford too much for his own good. He always was watching his brother’s back, protecting him from bullies. Stan had sacrificed so much so his brother wouldn’t be alone.

 “And what had that jerk done ever done for you?” A different voice asked him provokingly. “He said, ‘Goodbye Stan. I no longer want anything to do with you or our plans. I need to go to a college I hadn’t heard of last week and study things your pathetic brain could never understand.’ Then, that stuck-up, insufferable know-it-all got his own brother tossed into the streets.”

 Why should Stan help him? Ford was too wrapped up in his own life to concern himself with Stan’s problems. Ford would take advantage of his brother’s kindness and kick him out the moment things were looking up. Some brother he turned out to be.

 No, Ford was on his own this time.

 Stan pulled over, too angry to focus on the road. He plucked a paper off the floor of the car, scrawled a note on the back, and put it in his pocket. Going to the nearest post office, he sent off the letter. (The saps who worked there hadn’t noticed him slip a rather large pack of stamps into his pocket. Stan Pines, Shoplifter Extraordinaire, strikes again!)

 He drove off to the closest town, hoping that people around here were as gullible as he had heard. Concern for his brother still weighed in the back of his mind. He ignored it.  Rescuing Ford was no longer his job. Besides, how bad could things really be?

 ------- 

Stanford Pines lay huddled on the floor of his cabin, trembling from shock. How he hated the necessity of sleep.   It had once beckoned to him, a safe haven from life’s fears and pain. Now it was the means for Bill to use his body to do horrible, unspeakable things.

 Ford’s clothes and hair were sopping wet, as though the demon had driven him to plunge headfirst into a lake. The frigid January air whistled through the house, causing hypothermia to set in. He forced himself into a sitting position and stripped the waterlogged garments off. His arms now bare, he noticed several long gashes running from his elbow to his wrist.

 Had Bill tangled with a beast and lost? Had he punched through the windows, trying to get to the portal? (The dream demon had little concept of how to act human. Ford wasn’t sure he even knew how to open a door.)   

 He remembered lying in the snow outside his house, blood pooling around him. Adrenaline had allowed him the strength to crawl through the door and weakly kick it shut. (His deteriorating health must have caused Bill to dump his body near the cabin. A small mercy, but Ford wasn’t going to complain.)

             Having stared at the ceiling in a confused daze for several minutes, Ford hauled himself to his feet. The gouges on his arm needed immediate medical attention.

 Why did everything look blurred? Rubbing his eyes, he realized that his glasses were missing from his face. Thankfully, he kept extra pairs around the house. He felt his way to the bathroom and slipped one on. He sanitized his hands, flushed out his wounds, and wrapped sterile bandages around each arm.

 He went to his room and pulled on the clothes that smelled the least offensive.

 Ford’s feet carried him to the kitchen. What little food remained was either covered in mold or expired. It would be another day of subsisting on coffee.

 He filled a coffee pot with water and dumped the entire bag of coffee grounds in the top of the machine. He couldn’t sleep. Not now. Not when he was so close to making things right.

 Ford forced several cups of brew down his throat. It scalded his esophagus, but the pain only sharpened his mind and staved off fatigue.  

 How long had it been since he asked Stan for help? Days? Weeks?  

 Would he come after all that had happened? Could he be trusted?

 As he took his last sip of coffee, there was a knock at the door. He loaded the crossbow that sat by the front door. The newcomer could be another of Bill’s puppets, here to try to steal knowledge from his brain.

 He swung the door open, prepared for the worst. It wasn’t Stan, nor did the person look as though he was possessed.

 A very frightened postman stood on Ford’s doorstep. “Lett-letter for- for Stanford Pines,” he stuttered.

 Ford narrowed his eyes and snatched it out of the terrified man’s hands. He didn’t lower the weapon until the postman had sprinted off his property.

 Once he was gone, Ford shut the door and unfolded the letter.

 On the back of a very dirty, stained advertisement for Compulsive Liars Anonymous was written:

 Stanford,

You couldn’t be bothered to call or write or even ask Ma about me, once? I don’t hear from you for ten years, and then, boom, you ask me to pull you out of some scrape?  Do you know what I’ve been through? I’m sure you found out all about my fake identities. No one wants to hire me. The only reason I’m not dead is cause I’m good at lying. But why should you care? You’re too good for your brother, with your college education and your house in Who Cares, Oregon.

I don’t know what you’ve gotten yourself into, but count me out.  Good luck with your life, or whatever.

Stanley

Ford tore at his hair, cursing everything in creation.  He was alone with the monster. The last glint of hope had just died. He was trapped, forever to be tormented by the demon.

The monster was watching his every move.  Everywhere Ford looked, he saw the yellow glint, the horrible cat slit pupil. They thought he wouldn’t notice, but he did. Bill had possessed everyone in the town.  They were going to come for Ford, to torture him or worse.

 He thought about burning down the cabin, extinguishing Bill’s chances of using his body or research ever again.

 He grabbed a stack of paper and scattered them on the floor. He pulled a pack of matches out of a kitchen drawer and began lighting them. Finding success on the twelfth attempt (his shaking had caused him to drop the first eleven matches), he lit the floor. The flame spread through the kitchen and into the hall.

 He watched with a mixture of pride and self-pity. It would be a horrible way to die, but some sacrifices had to be made for the greater good. Why not go out in a blaze of glory? (Later, he would realize his unintentional pun, and groan.)

 In a sudden moment of clarity, he grabbed a fire extinguisher and doused the rising flames. The portal wouldn’t burn or melt. It was composed almost entirely of metal.  Bill could lead another sap to find two of his journals and recreate the other.

 No. The portal had to go. It was the only way of ensuring the safety of the world.

 But first, he had to hide the journal. He chose somewhere not even he would think to look: in plain sight. He hurried over to his study, wrapped the volume in an inconspicuous book jacket, and placed it haphazardly on the shelf.

 Time was running out. Once Bill found out his intentions, there would be only a short window to act.

 Once in the basement, he searched for something to demolish the inter-dimensional gateway. He found a steel beam and swung with all his might. It barely made an impact on the base. He swore and tried again. Minutes later, dents appeared, growing larger with every hit.

 The foundation creaked and groaned, threatening to topple onto Ford. Still, he continued the assault, as though his life depended on destroying the machine. (Which he realized, it did.)

 Despite his madness, he still had enough sense to step aside as the portal crashed to the ground. He worked through the night, disassembling the device.  He was careful to dent and bend each piece, rendering it worthless.

 His work completed, he sunk to the ground, completely exhausted. His eyes fluttered shut despite protestations and an effort to stay conscious. Inky blackness crowded around him, and he succumbed to sleep.

 Sometime later, he awoke in the mindscape, feeling lucid and alert. So this would be his swan song. Foiling Bill’s plans and saving the world from destruction.

 Months of neglect and heavy damage to his psyche showed in the crumbling structure of his house.  It looked so real, so familiar. Yet there were differences. Most rooms looked as though they had been torched. Doors would appear and disappear at random. His bedroom was awash with yellow light. In the middle of the floor was a pit. He had almost walked into it in his aimless ramblings.

 Ford could feel a hand lifting him off his feet by his hair. He screamed for help, but there was no one to hear his cries. The unseen being carried him over to the hole and tossed him in.

 He fell for what felt like an eternity. (Bottomless pits were a spatial impossibility, weren’t they?  Did the laws of reality even apply here?)

 At last, a pinprick of light appeared, rapidly growing beneath Ford’s feet. He fell onto something soft and spongy.

 Looking around, Ford realized that he was now sitting on a large, comfortable armchair in a study, not unlike his own.   Bill sat in a chair opposite, watching him. “Oh Sixer,” he said, sounding both amused and furious. “Did you really think it’d be that easy?”

 “I destroyed the portal and scattered my journals. In tormenting me, you’ve lost the only way into this dimension. Everything you worked for is gone.”  Ford hoped that his bravado masked the pure terror he was experiencing.

 “That’s true, kid. Maybe I should have thought things through.” Bill snapped his fingers, in mock defeat. Had he had a mouth, Ford was sure that an evil smirk would be playing on the demon’s lips. “You gave it your best shot. It’s too bad that I always have a Plan B.”

 Screwing up his courage, Ford made a mad, desperate rush at the demon. He might not be able to destroy Bill, but he could finally get revenge for all the abuse of the last year. Before he could land a single blow, Bill caught Ford by his throat and squeezed.

 “Whoa, whoa, Fordsey. Calm down.”  The scientist was flailing wildly, trying to escape his vice-like grip.

 “You know, it’s hilarious that you actually thought you could stand a chance against me. Do you have any idea of what kind of power I have here?” At this, the demon’s grasp around the man’s trachea tightened. The sound of fracturing cartilage echoed through the void.

 He tossed his captive to the ground like a child bored with a toy.  As Ford lay there gasping for breath, he continued, “Consider that a warning for the next time you want to be a hero. The only reason you’re still alive is because I’m not through with you.”

 “I’m…done…being…your…pawn,” Ford said still gasping between each word.  The front of his neck was already swelling massively and turning a hideous purple color.

 Bill’s laugh was shrill and cruel. He turned his back to Ford, hands clasped behind him. “That’s what I like about you.  Always did things your own way.  But you will help me. Won’t take much persuasion either. In the end, we could even be friends.”

 This received no answer other than deafening silence and a hateful glare.

 “Let me put it to you this way.” He turned back and fixed his gaze on Ford. “You’re not the only one I’ve been watching.”  An image of a very disgruntled Stan flashed in the demon’s eye. “Your brother seems like a great puppet. I wonder if he breaks as easily as you.”

 A fresh jolt of fear shot down Ford’s back. Had Bill made a deal with his twin? Was Stan Plan B, or only the trump card enabling it to move forward?

If he couldn’t save his brother, he was bent on stopping him with any means necessary.

Ford let out a pained sigh. “Fine. But I have conditions. One: you are not allowed to possess my brother or me. Two: Stan is allowed to leave anytime he wishes. Three: We are the only ones involved in this. No other person and none of your minions.”

 His voice lowered to a dangerous growl. “And I swear, if you cause Stan any harm, I will find a way to tear your molecules apart. I don’t care if it takes me the rest of my natural-born life.”

 Bill rolled his eye. “You flesh sacks are so boring. You can’t set people on fire, can’t make them go hopelessly insane…”

 The man’s face hardened. “You need my experience and intellect. I am not going to help you now or ever if you won’t agree to the terms.”

 The demon huffed, but held out a hand, which Ford shook.  Cold fire enveloped their arms as they sealed the contract.

“One more thing before you go, Poindexter.” Bill shot a mischievous look towards Ford. “How about a game of chess?”