#the day i sit my ass down and make a bucky 'this was a home once' animatic

[starphobe]

thinking abt the applebees today

[vintagebuckybarnes]

In Vino Veritas

Pairing → Avenger! Bucky Barnes x Lab Assistant! Female! Reader

Total Wordcount → 3.5K

Summary → It all started when you and the Avengers enjoyed drinks during the afterparty back at the Avengers Tower. There, Tony revealed one of your deepest secrets, and even though you wish it had never come to light at first, you’re glad it did when the man you love stands on your doorstep, ready to start the rest of your life together.

Tags & Warnings → Semi-canon compliant, Avenger! Bucky Barnes, Female! Reader, Tony’s Lab Assistant! Reader, Bucky’s past as TWS is mentioned, emotional hurt/comfort, mutual pining, some cursing, and explicit sexual content.

Tags: Smut → Grinding, begging, some dirty talk, praise, teasing Bucky, protected sex, cowgirl position.

Story Rating → Explicit

Author’s Note → This story is beta'd by the wonderful @late-to-the-party-81, and I cannot thank you enough for that. I hope you'll all enjoy my story, which is filled with some angst, lots of fluff, and some smut to top it all off! 💜

Writing Prompts @fandom-free-bingo Bug Edition → “There is no us.” | Riding | In vino veritas | “Touch me.” @fandom-free-bingo Medical Edition → Crush at first sight @julybreakbingo Post-JBB → Being confronted about their feelings for another

Tags List → If you’d like to be tagged in my stories, you can add yourself to my tag list here.

The evening starts fine, good, even. But it all takes an unexpected turn when the man you work for - Tony Stark - reveals your secret. A secret that you’d only recently revealed to him.

Earlier that day, you’d spotted Bucky as he was working out and from that moment on your mind has been with him instead of your usual work and tasks.

“Hello, Y/N? Anyone home in there?” Tony asks as he lays a hand on your shoulder, making you jump. You look up at him with a worried look while he smiles back at you with a kind expression. A soft sigh escapes your lips as the thoughts in your head wander off again, specifically how his back looked underneath the tank top he wore in the gym while doing squats. Not only that, but you also can’t stop thinking about the way his ass looked in the sweatpants he wore. In a word, magnificent.

“Is everything okay with you? You’ve been a bit off your game today.” As Tony sits next to you, you put down the screwdriver you were holding - the one he asked you three times to pass to him - before turning to face him, your gaze focusing somewhere on the wall behind him. For a moment, there’s a silence between you as you gather the courage to tell him what’s been on your mind.

“Well, uhm- There’s something, or someone, that I can’t stop thinking about, and it’s taking over my mind every second of every day. It- It’s Bucky,” you say almost in a whisper. For a few seconds, Tony is completely silent as he lets the thought of you having a crush on one of his fellow Avengers sit in his mind. Then, after what seemed like an eternity, he reaches out for your hand and takes it between his warm ones.

“You know that I’ll always support you in everything, right? I supported you when you expressed your desire to halt your life as an Avenger and retrain as my lab technician, and I supported you when you moved out of Avengers Tower to have your own home with more peace. This is not going to be any different. All I’m hoping for is that he will make you the happiest and best version of you, as you deserve nothing less.”

Tears brim at your waterline as Tony tells you this, and even though you deeply appreciate him, his words, and everything he has done for you, you can’t help but still feel a bit… odd about the fact you told him you’re having a crush on Bucky. That you have a crush on the man who was once the most feared assassin in the world under the hands of HYDRA.

“Now, can you hand me that screwdriver before your thoughts wander off to him again?” your boss asks in a teasing tone, making you smile as you grab it and hand it to him. Somehow, he always seems to know the right thing to say, and it's exactly why you enjoy spending time by his side while learning everything there is to know about his lab and what's going on in there.

Just as you’re about to get comfortable with another drink in your hand, you meet the gaze of the man you’re crushing on, and you feel heat coursing through your veins. The lines around his deep blue eyes intensify as he smiles at you, his attention making every last thought in your brain disappear. You’re so captivated by how Bucky looks at you that you miss your seat as you sit down. However, before you fall, you’re caught by a pair of solid arms that prevent you from hitting the floor.

“Careful there, Little One,” Thor says in his deep voice, his accent always making the butterflies in your stomach go wild. Even though you’d known Thor since you were young, you couldn’t help but get a little flustered by the nickname, and he smiled at you as you were finally sitting on the chair you intended to use.

“Thank you, Thor,” you whisper before sipping your cocktail. Around you, the conversations are starting to become a little blurry as you focus on Bucky and everything he has to say, his lips forming around the words effortlessly. When you suddenly feel a little shove against your arm, you yelp, making everyone go silent as they look at you.

“What did you do that for?!” you ask Thor in a low voice, but all he does is point to Tony, who obviously has something to say as he’s waving for everyone’s attention. There are moments when you enjoy the fact that alcohol can bring out people’s true feelings or thoughts, also known as in vino veritas, but not now. Oh no, now you wish you could disappear as you listen to the words coming out of Tony’s mouth.

“Guys, you really shouldn’t say this to Bucky or Y/N, but they’re having a massive crush on one another!” Tony says in a loud whispering tone, but what he fails to notice in his inebriated state is that you two are sitting right across from one another, enjoying the afterparty just like everyone else. Or at least, you were enjoying the afterparty until your secret got out.

The glass you were holding falls out of your hand before shattering into pieces on the floor, and your feet carry you as fast as they can away from the party and away from your worst nightmare come true. The music behind you fades away as you turn one corner after another, tears burning in your eyes as the event repeatedly replays in your mind. Your lungs start to burn as you keep running, the stinging feeling in your side increasing as you run out of the Avengers Tower into the night.

Meanwhile, Bucky’s world feels like it has taken a 180-degree turn. Mere minutes ago, he could only fantasize that you could have feelings for him, but now? A wave of disbelief washes over the super soldier, his expression showing pure surprise as he takes the moment in. For him, it was a crush at first sight from the momentyou walked into the training room on your first day. Over the years, his feelings have intensified, although he has only told Steve about his crush - or rather his now deep-rooted love - for you.

And yet, now that the pair of you have been confronted about your feelings for one another, he doesn’t know what to do. He has replayed the moment he’d confess his feelings to you more times than he can count in his mind, and in none of those versions, this is one of the scenarios that had appeared. It’s only when Steve grabs his arm and pulls him away that he seemingly comes back to reality again.

“Bucky, how does Tony know about your crush on Y/N? I mean, I’m, of course, fine with you sharing it, but-”

“I don’t know, Steve, I don’t know, and it kills me,” Bucky says as he runs his fingers through his cropped hair.“Fuck- I was planning on telling her this week but… but now it’s ruined, and I didn’t even get the chance to talk to her, and-” It’s all Bucky can say as he fights the urge to punch the wall with his metal fist, both hands clenched by his side as he tries to regulate his breathing. Without warning, Steve pulls him into a hug, and Bucky’s arms snake around his best friend's waist as his fingers clutch at the fabric of his shirt.

“It’s going to be okay, I promise,” Steve whispers, though he’s not entirely sure that’s true because he knows as well as anyone that things don’t always go back to how they were before. Still, Bucky decides to believe him as they stand there for a little while longer, and he soaks in every bit of comfort he can get for now. Lord knows he’s going to need it.

The past few days have been strange, to say the least. You haven’t been to the Avengers Tower since Tony revealed your now not-so-secret crush on the super soldier. You’re afraid of what will happen if you do. This also means you haven’t seen Bucky in a few days, and you miss him. You miss hearing his laugh, and you miss seeing how his mouth turns slightly upward as you hand him one of your baked goods, but most of all, you miss how his arms feel when he pulls you in for a hug.

Just as you’re about to make yourself a cup of tea, you get pulled from your thoughts by a soft but familiar knock on the door; only one thing can make that sound: Bucky’s metal hand knocking against the wood. For a moment, you contemplate your actions, but decide to give him at least a chance to talk, especially as it wasn’t him who laid out your feelings in front of everyone.

“Bucky, hi,” you say softly as you take in his appearance, your heart sinking as you do. It’s evident he hasn’t slept at all the past few days. There are dark circles under his eyes, and he doesn’t look as healthy as usual—more disheveled. The struggles he’s facing are apparent in his entire demeanor, and all you want to do is wrap him up in a warm blanket and cuddle him until the end of time.

“Hi,” he says hoarsely, and you step aside, allowing him to enter your apartment. He’s been here a few times already, and usually there’s a warmth radiating from you and every inch of the little place you call home, but ever since the party, it hasn’t been the same. It isn’t just the apartment, either. You feel different.

“Would you like some tea before we talk?” you ask to break the tension. “I was about to make some.”

He nods at you before wandering further into your apartment, and you head to the kitchen, picking out another mug for Bucky to use. Once he’s caught sight of your couch, he immediately takes a seat, a soft groan audible as he does. There aren’t many places more comfortable than the large couch that’s standing right here in your living room.

When you emerge a few minutes later with two steaming mugs of tea and a plate filled with chocolate chip cookies you baked fresh this morning, Bucky can’t help but smile at you. He gladly takes the tea with one of the cookies, as they’re his favorite, and when you sit down next to him, it feels just like it always has, as if nothing has changed. But you both know it has, and that’s why the super soldier’s now in your living room.

“So…” you start, unsure what to say now that he’s sitting on your couch. Bucky’s eyes are trained on the steaming tea in his hands, his thoughts going a mile a minute as he’s thinking about what he wants to say - other than confessing his love for you.

“So… uhm, we missed seeing you around the Tower,” Bucky starts, though you both know it’s mostly him who has missed seeing you there. You have always been a staple there during his mornings as you make him a cup of coffee, and during movie nights, you were always the one he could sit next to and enjoy the movie, but now that you’re not there, it’s like a piece of soul has left the Tower with you.

“I mean, yeah. It’s been a bit awkward for me to go back after what happened a few days ago,” you tell him, and a shudder of horror runs down your spine at the thought of having to face Tony again. A smile tugs at the corners of Bucky’s lips as he thinks back to what happened that night, a happy memory of your first meeting resurfacing in the back of his mind as he does.

“Good morning, Sergeant Barnes. I’ve made some chocolate chip cookies, if you want some. However, I should warn you, Tony’s been on the prowl since I took them out of the oven, so I’ll advise you to be quick,” you say with a glare towards Tony, who has been eyeing them up since he walked into the kitchen and poured himself a cup of coffee. For the first time in a long time, Bucky showed something akin to a smile, and everyone looked at each other to ensure they saw it, too.

“Thank you,” he says lowly, grabbing one of the smaller ones on the plate, followed by a cup of coffee, before swiftly leaving the kitchen to spend more time in his room. Before Bucky even left the kitchen, Tony was on the cookies as if he hadn’t eaten in weeks, and this time you let him.

“Can I- Is it okay if I tell you something? Because if I don’t say it now, I don’t know if I ever will,” Bucky says softly, and you nod before repositioning yourself so that you’re facing him. His gaze is still trained on his mug as he thinks carefully about his next words, afraid he might accidentally say the wrong thing.

“Tony was right. He is right, actually. When he said, we’re crushing on each other. I’ve been crushing on you since you offered me those chocolate chip cookies when Tony threatened to eat them all before anyone else had a chance to get them. It was like a switch flipped inside me back then, and I haven’t been the same since,” Bucky says, his mouth now in a line as he tells you about his feelings.

“Each time I look at you, it’s like I’m seeing an angel, and every time I hear your voice, it’s like a little piece of my soul is healing, too. I find myself drawn to you in every room and wonder what life has in store for us. But deep down inside, I know there is no ‘us’ yet. But I want there to be us. I want you, Y/N. I want you to be mine, in whatever capacity you’ll have me. If you want to stay friends, that’s okay with me, but if you want more, I’ll happily accept every bit of love you’re willing to offer me.”

Once Bucky’s done, you’re unsure what to say. What to think. What to do. You want to say that the feelings between you are mutual, that you’re in love with him and that you want nothing more than to be his, but something inside you is stopping you. So, instead of saying anything, you place your hand over his flesh limb, and his eyes slip shut at the feeling of your soft fingers against his rough hand.

“Bucky.” His name is a whisper on your lips, but it’s enough to make him look at you, to meet your gaze.

“I’m in love with you, too.”

As soon as the words leave your lips, Bucky carefully put his tea on the coffee table before hauling you onto his lap, his hands digging into the soft flesh of your waist as your lips interlock in a passionate dance. He can’t get enough of your soft mouth slotting together with his and the way his tongue fights for dominance with yours as your fingers dig into his neck. It’s been a long time since you’ve felt a strong connection with someone, and you’re happy to explore it with Bucky.

Your hips grind over his growing length of their own volition,your body looking for any bit of friction it can get. Without warning, one of Bucky’s hands slides lower until he’s cupping your ass, making you gasp into his mouth as a result. Bucky can’t help but smile into the kiss as he pulls you impossibly closer, your legs spreading just a bit further as you sink against his muscular body.

“Hmm, I’ve been wanting this - you - for so long,” he says between the kisses trailing your jaw towards your ear, his teeth nipping on your earlobe as your head lolls to the side. With every passing second, your thoughts are melting away more and more, and all that’s left inside your mind is Bucky. Soon, his other hand joins the first as he helps you grind onto him, a groan falling from his lips as he sets a perfect pace for you both.

“B-Bucky—" his name sounds more like a whine than anything else. “I—I want you.”

���But you already have me, pretty girl, ‘m right here,” he says with a teasing lilt to his voice, his hands continuing to help you grind until you’re a complete mess for him. Your shorts are ruined, your arousal soaking through them and onto the bulge in his black jeans, much to Bucky’s joy. He was wondering what it would take to get you to this point, and it turns out it won’t take much.

He smiles against the skin of your neck, where he’s taking his time to mark you with hickeys and small bitemarks, all of which leave you a bit more of a moaning, begging mess on his lap, much to his pride. When one of your hands moves away from his neck and down his torso, he quickly catches on to what you’re doing. “Someone’s a little impatient today, huh?”

“Yes, oh god, yes! I need you to touch me, Bucky. I want to feel you inside me as you make me fall apart on your cock, and I need you to fuck me like there’s no tomorrow!” Your voice sounds more breathy than usual, but every care you thought you had has gone out the window. All you want is Bucky and his cock to ride, until you’re orgasming so hard and long you can’t remember your name.

“Okay, I will. Don’t you worry about anything, okay? Let me take care of you, and I’ll give you everything you need and more,” he reassures you in a shushing voice. You nod before kissing him again, which immediately deepens before he gently helps you get up, allowing you to take off your panties and shorts, and he can take off his pants and boxershorts, too. As soon as you’re both freed from your last pieces of clothing, you hand him a condom you retrieved from the side table drawer while he took the time to undress himself.

“Hmmm, looks so thick,” you tell him as you look at it with wide eyes, wondering how he’s going to fit inside you as you’re positioning yourself on his lap once more, your legs bracketing his thicks thighs as you get comfortable.

“I know, but I’m gonna go slow. Wouldn’t want to hurt you and your perfect, sweet little pussy.” He smiles as he holds his cock in place, your pliant body sinking onto him slowly as your fingers dig into his shoulders to steady yourself. Your hiss of pleasure is audible and your face contorts at the slight sting of him stretching you, but just like he promised, Bucky is taking it slow to ensure you’ll both have the most amazing first time.

As soon as you’re fully seated on his lap, your body goes limp against him, your face tucked in the crook of his neck as you adjust to his girth, and Bucky places soft kisses on your head while praising you through it all. “You’re doing so well for me, baby. Such a good girl for me, letting me take the lead and giving you exactly what you need.”

A small smile appears on your face as you look up at him with big, doe-like eyes, and he can’t help but smile back as the back of his fingers gently caress your cheek. He may have thought you were beautiful before, but nothing compares to this moment. 

“I love you, Y/N, and I promise to take care of you with every fiber of my being,” he whispers, his lips sealing his promise against your cheek. Your eyes fall shut at his words, and his hand moves down your side until it’s on your hip again, ready for you to let him know when you’re good to go. Your bodies work in complete sync with one another with every rise and fall of your chest, and his hands guide you beautifully as you slowly sink and rise on his length.

“Fuck, you feel so good,” he groans, and it doesn’t take long for both of you to find your highs for the first time, and they’re serving as a promise of everything else that’s still to come in this lifetime. A few days ago, you and Bucky didn’t even know you felt the same about one another, but now you’re sharing the start of the rest of your lives, and it’s all thanks to Tony. Because without him, you wouldn’t have been able to tell the man of your dreams how much you love him.

Masterlist → Bucky Barnes

GIF: Source → All the other graphics you see are made by @vintagebuckybarnes

[sunday-bug]

Can you write more about congressman Bucky?? I’m so feral for that lol

Same 🥵 yes. I’m gonna go for it here and make this 18+ filth. Hope that’s cool. And let's make it from Bucky's POV because I'm a slut 😛

MDNI 18+ below

She'd been driving me up a wall all goddamned night. That dress. Those heels with her cute pink toenails peeking out. The way she brushed her hair over her shoulder and smiled at me with that gorgeous mouth.

"Bucky?"

"Huh?" I ask, not knowing what the hell she just asked me.

She giggles, "I asked if you wanted to get a drink."

We'd just finished going over a policy proposal at dinner, and I was wired. I could barely focus on anything except the way her hands wrapped around the stem of her wine glass, how she leaned over the table a bit to go over certain parts of the draft, and the way she'd offered me a bite of her meal from her fork.

"No," I say sternly. "Bars are crowded this time of night, anyway."

She nods, a small frown on her face, "Okay, then. I guess I'll see you at work tomorrow."

"Wait, no. Come home with me," I rasp, almost desperately.

She smiles at me shyly and whispers, "Lead the way."

We walk to my place, not far at all, but in this moment of anticipation it felt like half a world away. She brushes her hand against my flesh one, and I grab it, intertwining our fingers. Her hands are soft and warm. We walk up the few steps to my place and I fumble a bit with my keys before opening the door, and motioning her inside.

"Finally," I say as I swing the door shut behind me. She turns to me and takes off my jacket. That's all it takes before I feel the line I've been carefully toeing with her snap. I pick her up and she wraps her legs around me, kissing my lips and neck, unbuttoning my dress shirt and loosening my tie.

I walk us slowly up the stairs, careful with her in my arms. My hands travel from her ass to her waist and I groan. "You've been driving me crazy all damn night. Hell, since you walked into my office on the first day."

I lie her down on my bed and pull off her heels slowly, my fingers tracing up her calves. She sits up, unzipping her dress and yanking it down to reveal a black lace bra and...

"Fuck, no underwear?" I swallow, taking in her naked body in my bed. It feels like ever liter of blood in my body rushes to my cock.

She smiles shyly again, a rosy blush tinging her cheeks. I take off my shirt and tie, tossing them on the floor. She sits up on her knees in the bed and reaches for my belt buckle, unclasping it along with my pants, pulling them down.

"Can I?" She asks quietly, perfect hands on the waistband of my boxers.

"Please," I beg, running a hand through her hair.

She pulls my boxers down and my erection springs free.

"Oh," she whispers, looking up at me through her lashes.

"Oh?" I ask hungrily. "I think you can take it."

She lets out a little moan as I lay her back on the bed, my hand reaching for her waist, traveling further down to please her. So wet already.

"I need you," she whispers into my neck as she plays with my hair, giving me goosebumps. "Please."

That little please sends me over the edge, and I push her knees apart with my own, positioning myself between her legs. She bucks her hips into mine and I smile. "Eager, baby?"

"Mhmm," she whines, running her fingers down my arms.

I push the tip inside and watch her eyes light up, "Good?"

She nods, and I keep going, "Fuck... You feel so good."

Her breathing gets deeper as I push into her, motivating me. She's gripping at the back of my neck, tugging on the back of my hair, letting loose little moans.

“God damn, baby, move with me,” I rasp out, grabbing her hip and pumping in and out.

She reciprocates and I feel like I could cum right then and there.

"Bucky... God," she whines. "Fuck me." She closes her eyes and tilts her head back. I kiss and bite her neck, never stopping my pace, loving the way she feels wrapped around me.

She starts to tighten around my cock and I know she's close. I pick up one of her legs and put it on my shoulder, pressing even deeper into her and groaning.

"I'm... I'm gonna," she starts to say, her eyes opening to look into mine.

"I know, baby, I can feel it. Let go on me." As soon as I give her permission I feel her body shudder and she cries out again, fingernails leaving marks on my back.

"Just like that. Good girl," I praise her, putting her leg back down and picking up my pace, feeling my own release creeping up on me.

"I'm close, love," I warn her, feeling my legs start to tighten.

"Cum in me," she whispers and I groan again.

"Yeah? You want me to?" I clarify, knowing I'm almost there.

She nods and bites her lip seductively, and that's all it takes.

I grab her hips and press into her until I can't any more, feeling my own release, "Jesus Christ."

I pull out slowly and lay down next to her, catching my breath, and looking over at her.

"Stay there, doll, I'll get you cleaned up."

-the end-

this was just filth, but I kinda needed it haha

[greengoblinswifey]

Silken Punishment—Bucky Barnes x Fem!Reader

summary— you and bucky have a petty argument that leaves you upset and defiant. he finds you at a club, upset by your behavior and outfit and takes you home to teach you a lesson.

warnings— brat!reader, spanking, praise kink, slight degradation, face fucking, cock worship, sergeant and sir kink, fingering, katoptronophilia, orgasm denial, edging, choking, unprotected sex, spit kink, creampie, aftercare.

a/n— my first bucky fic on here, i’ve only ever written for him on my ao3 @/greengoblinswhore. comments and reblogs are appreciated, enjoy <3

︵‿୨♡୧‿︵‿︵‿୨♡୧‿︵‿︵‿୨♡୧‿︵‿︵‿

The fight between you and Bucky had started over something trivial. He’d been more protective than usual lately—maybe too much. You’d gone out with some friends, and he didn’t like how late you were staying out or the company you were keeping. Tempers flared, words were exchanged, and before you knew it, he stormed off to the Avengers Tower, muttering something about needing space to think.

But space wasn’t what you needed. Frustrated and defiant, you slid into a delicate, lace overlay garment with dress, if you could even call it that. Its semi-sheer design subtly revealed your figure underneath, giving it a bold yet elegant allure. The white lace contrasted beautifully against your dark skin, creating a striking visual that you knew would draw attention to your curves and ass. The club down the street beckoned, and within minutes, you were there, moving to the rhythm of the music under the pulsing lights. You knew heads turned as you swayed your hips, your dress catching the strobe light, revealing your bare ass and your boobs but you didn’t care. Tonight was about you.

The air shifted suddenly. A familiar presence sent a shiver down your spine before you even saw him. Bucky. You felt his icy blue gaze cut through the crowd, pinning you in place. Turning, you saw him striding towards you, his jaw tight and his expression unreadable.

“Let’s go. Now,” he growled, his voice barely audible over the pounding bass.

You tilted your head, smirking defiantly. “I’m not going anywhere with your bossy ass.”

His eyes narrowed, and he stepped closer, his metal arm glinting under the club lights. “We’re not doing this here. Let’s talk at home.”

“Maybe I don’t feel like going home,” you shot back, taking a step toward the dance floor.

Before you could blink, Bucky had you over his shoulder, his vibranium arm holding you securely as he made his way through the stunned crowd. “You’re testing my patience, doll,” he muttered.

“Put me down, Bucky!” you squealed, pounding at his back, but he didn’t flinch. You knew better than to think anyone would intervene—who would dare challenge the Winter Soldier?

Once home, the door barely clicked shut before Bucky carried you straight to the bedroom. He set you down briefly before sitting on the edge of the bed, his intense gaze never leaving yours. “Over my knee,” he commanded softly but firmly.

You blinked, your defiance faltering for a moment. “You can’t—”

“Now.”

His voice left no room for argument. You hesitated, your heart pounding as you realized exactly what kind of punishment he had in mind.

He smirked as his metal arm rested on his thigh, the other guiding you firmly over his knee. His fingers skimmed over the hem of the dress you’d worn to the club, shaking his head. “This little thing leaves nothing to the imagination,” he muttered, his voice tight with frustration. “Back in my day, they’d have called you all kinds of whore for showing this much skin.”

You twisted your neck to look at him, a small, teasing smirk tugging at your lips. “Maybe, but I’m your whore, aren’t I?”

“Not the time,” Bucky snapped, his tone cutting enough to make your smirk falter. “You scared me half to death tonight, and this is how you decide to act? Think you’re getting off easy, doll?”

Before you could respond, his warm flesh hand came down against your ass with a sharp smack, making you gasp. The sting wasn’t overwhelming, but it was enough to make you feel it. He never used his metal hand for something like this—it wasn’t in him to ever risk hurting you, even when he was upset.

“Count,” he instructed, his voice low but commanding. “And if you mess up, we start from one. Understood?”

“Yes sergeant,” you murmured, your voice soft but shaky.

“Good girl,” he replied. His hand came down again, and you squealed, “One!” He continued, the sound of his hand meeting you filling the room. Between each smack, you counted, your voice wavering as you tried to hold back the little sobs spilling from your glossy lips.

By the time you reached twenty, your protests were softer, your words nearly swallowed by your tears. “I didn’t mean it,” you whispered, burying your face into your folded arms. “I just wanted to have fun—I didn’t think it’d turn into all this.”

“It’s too late for that, doll,” Bucky said, his tone firm but laced with the quiet concern he was trying to mask. He helped you up after a moment, pulling you close against his chest. Your arms wrapped around his waist as you let out a soft sniffle, your cheek pressing into his shirt.

“You were scaring me,” he admitted, his voice finally softening as he stroked your back. “I don’t ever want to feel that way again.”

“I’m sorry,” you mumbled, pulling back just enough to look at him. “Can you hold me? Please?”

Bucky’s jaw tightened slightly. He wanted to scoop you up and tell you it was all forgiven, but you weren’t off the hook just yet. “When you’ve learned to be a good girl,” he replied. He tilted your chin up, meeting your watery gaze with his piercing blue eyes. “But you’re not there yet.”

Guiding you gently down to your knees, Bucky settled back into his seat on the bed. “If you’re really sorry, show me. Worship my cock,” he murmured, his lips curving into a small smirk. “Show me just how much you mean it.”

Your hands trembled slightly as you lowered his pants, the heat of his gaze making your skin prickle. He didn’t rush you, his metal fingers brushing against your cheek, his touch cold yet grounding. When his cock was free, you paused, your breath catching in your throat at the sight of him, hard.

“Don’t stop now, doll,” he said, his voice low and husky. The way his thumb grazed your bottom lip sent a shiver down your spine. “You’ve got something to prove, don’t you?”

You nodded, leaning forward to place a soft kiss on his tip, murmuring, “I love how perfect you are.” Your lips traced a slow, deliberate path, and you could feel the weight of his stare on you. “So big sergeant, so beautiful,” you whispered, your words a mix of praise and awe. You knew he liked hearing it, the way his jaw tightened and his fingers threaded through your hair told you so.

“That’s enough talking,” he said, his tone more commanding now. “I don’t need you to tell me, you’re gonna show me.”

Your lips parted, and you took him in your mouth, your movements deliberate and careful, your gaze flicking up to meet his. His hand tightened in your curls, guiding you just enough to remind you who was in control. “That’s it, doll,” he murmured, his voice dark and rough. “Keep going, just like that.”

You continued, your focus entirely on him, feeling his quiet approval in the way he relaxed, though his hand remained firmly in your hair. He let out a soft grunt, his other hand brushing against your shoulder as if to steady himself. “You’re doing so good for me,” he murmured, his words sending a wave of warmth through you. “Sometimes you can be a good girl.”

When you pulled back briefly, you kissed along his length, your lips soft against him, your voice barely above a whisper as you said, “I love making you feel good.” Your fingers traced gentle patterns on his cock, adding to the warmth of your affection. He groaned in response, his hand tugging lightly at your curls.

“Don’t get too cocky,” he warned, his words carrying a teasing edge. “You’re still making up for earlier.”

“Yes, sir,” you replied with a soft smile, letting your lips and hands continue their work, eager to earn his forgiveness.

You took him deep into your throat, gagging as you did but it only turned him on. His grip on your curls remained, pushing your head down then thrusting when you got too comfortable. You swirled your tongue around his shaft, saliva and pre cum dripping down your chin, and you made sure your eyes looked up at him, full of admiration.

“So fucking beautiful even when you’re a brat,” he moaned. He began thrusting faster, ready to shoot his load down your throat. “Get ready, and you’re going to swallow every drop.” You hummed in response, the vibration sending him over the edge and he pushed your head all the way down until your nose touched his pelvis. His cum shot down your throat and you swallowed every drop like the good girl you aimed to be.

His hand slipped under your chin, lifting your face to meet his eyes. He pulled you into his arms, his kiss firm and possessive, but the warmth behind it told you everything you needed to know. “You’ve got a lot to learn about behaving,” he said, brushing his thumb across your cheek, “but you’re lucky I’m a patient man.”

Bucky pulled you up effortlessly, his grip firm but careful as he placed you in front of the tall mirror. His sharp gaze met yours in the reflection, and you felt a flush creep up your neck when his hands slid down to your hips. With a slow tug, he removed the delicate fabric of your G-string, letting it fall to the floor.

“Look at you,” he said, his voice low as his fingers brushed against your inner thighs. His vibranium arm encircled your waist, holding you in place. “Soaked already? Really?” His tone was dripping with mockery, his smirk widening as your eyes darted down, embarrassed.

“Sergeant, I—” you stammered, but he cut you off with a shake of his head, his flesh hand slipping between your legs.

“Quiet,” he said, his lips close to your ear. “You’re going to take everything I give you, understand?”

Your breath hitched as his fingers moved against your clit, skilled and purposeful, drawing moans from you that you couldn’t contain. His vibranium arm tightened around your waist, keeping you pressed against his chest when your knees began to weaken. “Stay still,” he warned, his voice firm. “You wanted to act out? Now look at the mess you’re making—on me, on the floor, everywhere.”

Your head fell back against his shoulder, his fingers plunging inside your pussy deeper, each movement making you squirm against him. “Stop squirming,” he growled, his tone almost mocking. “You’ve got no one to blame but yourself.”

“Sergeant, please,” you gasped, your voice barely above a whisper as you felt your orgasm building inside you. Just when you were teetering on the edge, his hand stilled, leaving you desperate and trembling.

He stopped abruptly, taking his fingers into his mouth to suck off your juices before leaning down to spit it in your awaiting mouth. “Thank you sir,” you moaned, “can I cum now?”

“No,” he said, his voice cold and unyielding. “Brats don’t get rewarded.” He turned you to face the bed, guiding you forward. “Now, get up there. Face down. Ass up. Move.”

You obeyed, biting your lip as you crawled onto the bed, positioning yourself as he instructed. Your heart raced as you glanced at the mirror, where you could see the reflection of the both of you. Bucky stood behind you, his intense gaze fixed on you as he pulled off his shirt, revealing the muscles of his torso.

“As much as you look like a damn whore in that dress,” he said. “You look so sexy, it stays on.” His smirk was almost cruel, his hands brushing along the curve of your hips as he positioned himself behind you.

“You’re going to behave now, aren’t you, doll?” he murmured, his voice low but commanding. “Or do I need to remind you who’s in charge?”

You rolled your eyes and he slapped your ass in response, making you yelp.

Bucky didn’t hesitate, gripping your waist tightly before plunging into you with a force that left you gasping. Your face buried into the pillow instinctively, but his low, commanding voice brought you back. “Uh-uh,” he growled, his fingers tightening around your hips. “Look at yourself. Look at what happens when you act out. Watch me punish you.”

You turned your head toward the mirror, catching sight of him in all his glory. His sculpted muscles rippled with every movement, his biceps flexing as he held you in place. His sharp blue eyes met yours in the reflection, a look of dominance swirling in them. “That’s right,” he said, slamming into you harder, his voice a mixture of mockery and authority. “Watch. Don’t you dare look away.”

Your breath hitched as his pace quickened, each movement sending waves of pleasure coursing through you. “Sergeant, I’m sorry,” you gasped, your voice trembling.

“It’s too late for that,” he said sharply, his lips curving into a smirk. “You’ve been a brat and a damn whore all night. You don’t get to apologize now.”

His rhythm didn’t relent, his grip firm as he hit that spot inside you that made you tremble uncontrollably. “You’re enjoying this way too much,” he murmured, his tone almost teasing as he noticed the way your pussy soaked his cock. When you clenched around him, he let out a low groan, his hand coming down to your hip. “Are you gonna cum?” he asked, his tone dangerously low.

“Yes sir,” you admitted breathlessly, your body on the verge of giving in.

“Don’t you fucking dare,” he snapped, his tone a warning. “You better hold it.”

“I—I can’t,” you stammered, your voice breaking as your body betrayed you. “I’m sensitive, sir. Please—”

“You better,” he interrupted firmly, not letting up for a second. The sound of his voice made it clear he wasn’t going to let you off easily.

Without warning, he switched positions, lifting you effortlessly and laying you on the bed. Your upper body dangled off the edge, giving you a full view of the two of you in the mirror. His hands gripped your curls, holding you steady as he leaned in. “Open your mouth,” he commanded, his voice low. When you obeyed, he spat into your mouth, watching as you swallowed before letting go of your head.

Your vision swam as your head hung back, the view in the mirror giving you a dizzying look at him in control. Bucky’s pace was relentless, each movement rough, his body moving with a confidence that left you breathless. “Look at me,” he said sharply, his hand coming down to your thigh to steady you. “Keep your eyes open. I want you to see how hot this looks.”

“I’m sorry, Sergeant,” you whimpered, your voice barely audible as you struggled to keep up. “It won’t happen again, I promise.”

“I’m not so sure about that,” he said, his smirk widening as he continued without pause. “You’ve got a lot to prove.”

The sight of him, his sharp jawline clenched, his muscles taut as he worked you over was almost overwhelming. His focus never wavered, his gaze flicking between your reflection and your trembling form beneath him. The mix of roughness and control left you unable to look away. Your body bounced wildly as his hips snapped against yours and you weren’t sure how long you could take as the blood rushed to your head.

Bucky’s grip was firm around your throat as he pulled you up, his fingers brushing against your flushed cheeks before guiding you to straddle him. His broad frame sank into the mattress, his gaze flickering to the mirror in front of you both.

“So fucking sexy,” he murmured, his voice low and steady, an edge of possession lacing his words. “That dress, you know how many looks you got tonight? Too many.”

With a sharp tug, the delicate fabric tore easily under his hands. You gasped, eyes widening. “Bucky! That was my favorite!” you protested, pouting.

“Too bad,” he replied without hesitation, his lips curling into a smirk. “You’re not wearing it again, not out there, not for anyone else. You’re mine.”

Your skin prickled under his gaze as he adjusted your position, his hands steadying you on his lap. In the mirror, the two of you looked like something out of a dream, his powerful frame grounding you as your reflection showcased every subtle movement.

“Move,” he instructed, his tone soft but demanding. “Ride me like you mean it, doll.”

You obeyed, slowly at first, your hands bracing against his chest. His grip on your hips tightened as he guided you on his thick cock, his voice softening with praise. “That’s it, just like that. You’re doing so good, baby.”

As you found a rhythm, his eyes stayed locked on you in the mirror. “Fucking look at yourself,” he said, his hand tilting your chin so your eyes met his reflection. “Look how gorgeous you are, bouncing on my cock like that. All mine.”

You bounced on his cock faster at his praises, the sound of his voice spurring you on. “Faster,” he murmured, his voice dropping even lower. “Come on, doll. I know you can do better than that.”

You whimpered, your legs trembling with the effort. “I’m trying, sir,” you whispered breathlessly.

“I can see that,” he replied, a flicker of a smirk crossing his face. His hand moved to your throat, tilting your face toward him for a soft kiss. “But you’ve got to earn it. Don’t stop.”

As exhaustion set in, your grinding on his cock slowed, and he steadied you, his fingers trailing gently across your skin. He pulled you closer, his lips brushing your ear as he whispered, “Good girl. That’s my good girl.”

You gripped his muscular body for dear life, doing your best to grind against him to give you both the pleasure you needed. “Aww, that’s my girl, you’ve earned it, cum for me.”

His words were all you needed, your body shook on top of him, and your orgasm took ahold of you. Babbling incoherent words, you squirted on his cock, the sensation so intense that his cum spurted inside you. You both panted in each other’s arms as you rode out your high, Bucky laying kisses all over your face as he tried to ground you.

When it was all over, he laid you gently on the bed, his movements uncharacteristically tender as he grabbed a warm cloth and began to clean you up. His hands worked with care, his voice softening as he murmured, “I was worried about you tonight, you know. Don’t scare me like that again.”

“I’m sorry,” you whispered, your voice cracking slightly.

His gaze softened as he pressed a kiss to your forehead, pulling you into his arms. “Just don’t let it happen again, doll,” he said with a small smile, wrapping you in his warmth.

[loverslodge]

shifted for you

summary: bucky was stuck in a pup form till you came in his life

pairings: shifter!bucky barnes x reader

warnings: fluff, angst, SMUT, nudity, reference to his injury, barely a plot

A/N: this is the fic that is for my over 100 followers. thank you all for loving my work and following me. i am not good at interactions so i apologize i come off as snobby but i do encourage you to leave requests and messages.

Bucky was a shifting White Wolf till Hydra had ruined his shifts and he was stuck in pup form, even after Steve had found him.

The Avengers helped him but he could never shift back to himself and so Tony made Bucky a special communication device so he didn't have to bark every two seconds because everyone wanted to pet his cute ass.

One day he and Steve were ambushed and they got separated and Bucky would have gotten back, only if he knew what part of the city he was lost in and he had also lost his communication device.

You were walking home after a stressful day at work when you heard small whimpers coming from an alley.

You stopped and looked in the alley to see a roughed up pup with two electric blue eyes staring back at you.

“It's okay, little buddy. I'm not gonna hurt you.” You walk slowly and crouch down to approach the whimpering pup. “Let me help you. I promise I will try to find your owner.”

You were close enough to hold it but you held out your hand instead, wanting the pup to sniff and make sure you really meant him no harm.

He slowly walks over a little sniffs around your hand and he gives you the sweetest look and you give him your brightest smile but he struggled to walk to you so you whipped it up in your hand and pulled him close to your chest.

You brought it to the new vet that had opened near your house. The vet examined the wolf pup and gave him a suspicious look. The vet gave you a few tips and tricks on how to help the pup and gave you some supplies that would last you a few days before you could go shopping for them.

The pup had a metal left front leg that kept his balance. You figured it was from the previous owner. On your walk home, the pup stayed alert and kept on looking around. You found it adorable how smart and alert he was.

When you reached your apartment, you let him down and he cautiously made his way from one to another while you set up his stuff

You bent down to look at his neck. “I don't see any collar on you. How will I know what's your name and who's your owner? Do you have a name, Little Wolf?”

As if he could understand you, he nodded which shocked you. Perhaps this was a very well trained pup. “Ok. Well, you can't talk so I will have to find a way for you to spell your name out to me. Can you spell?”

After waiting a beat, the pup nodded again and you nodded back. You looked around to find a way to interact with him. You rummaged around the apartment to find something but couldn't come up with anything.

Meanwhile, you had poured food for the pup in his bowl but he wasn't eating it, giving it a disgusting look. He just drank the water and trotted to sit on the carpet in the living room.

“You've at least got to eat to keep the strength up. Do you not like the food?” He shook his head in no.

“Then what do you eat? Do you eat human food?” He nodded yes.

“You are a very weird wolf and your owner must be even weirder for feeding you human food.”

When your pizza arrived, you pulled out a spare plate for the pup to eat in. you turned on Stranger Things and were watching the scene where Will’s mother had written alphabets all over the wall for him to interact with her.

That clicked in your mind and you immediately pulled out a large paper and wrote alphabets on them for the pup to walk and put his paw on them.

“Here, now we can talk. Let's start by you telling me your name, Little Wolf.”

The pup trotted on the paper and put his paw on the alphabets and you wrote them down on your phone to stay up to speed.

B-U-C-K-Y

“Bucky? Is that your name?” The pup nodded a bit more enthusiastically.

“Well Bucky, looks like you're stuck with me for a while. At least till I find your owner.”

………………….

It had been almost a month since you had Bucky in your life. The pup hadn’t grown at all but you were used to having him around.

You had learnt quite a few things about him.

He loved sweet food, especially pancakes.

He would whine if he didnt see you for more than 15 minutes.

He was very alert and protective of you.

He loved to cuddle against your chest and crook of your neck.

Last but not the least, he has nightmares often but once you rub his head gently and coax him to sleep, he would cuddle into you and go back to sleep.

This is why he has been sharing the bed with you and you thought you were spoiling him but you couldn't see him sleep alone and have nightmares.

You work from home often but you go to the office from time to time to get a change of scenery.

So whenever you're working from home, he would snuggle into your lap.

But every time you left, he would be whimpering and whining the entire day till he hears you walk in.

“Hey Bucky! How has your day been? Did you do anything instead of missing me?” You teased the little pup. Bucky humphed and trotted away from you. “Aww, don't be like that. I was just teasing.”

You swooped down and held him closer to your chest and kissed his head. “I'm glad I found you, little wolf.

You give me so much comfort and you keep us safe, my fierce wolf.”

That night as you and pup cuddled, Bucky felt something shift in him and he jumped off the bed, trying not to hurt you.

As soon as his feet touched the ground, he just automatically shifted back to his 6 foot beefy human form.

Bucky excitedly walked in the bathroom and closed the door gently to not wake you up.

He looked at himself. He hadn't seen himself since Hydra had taken him. His vibranium pup hand had now grown with him, attached to his jagged shoulder.

Bucky must've spent an hour or so in the bathroom looking at himself. He slowly creeped out of the bathroom and stood right above you.

This was his chance to touch your face with his human form.

He's always wanted to feel how your skin would feel against his.

He caressed your face gently and it sent shivers down his spine.

Your skin was so fucking soft.

He wanted to bury his face in your neck and hold you close to him, make you feel the real him.

He had started developing a tiny (yeah right) crush on you.

You cared for him, cuddled him and shared everything with him.

He would find all kinds of ways to cuddle on your chest.

Your heartbeats always calmed him and your smell, damn, it was all he could think about.

And when you patted his head and caressed him and pulled him closer whenever he had nightmares, all he wanted to do was mark you up.

He leaned down and kissed your cheek.

He knew he would have to find a way to tell you about his shift.

But he didn't want to leave you either.

So he thought of risking it.

He tried shifting back and he did but this time he was a huge wolf and not a pup.

Then he thought maybe he should try shifting back to human form, see if it was still working and it did.

Bucky was, somehow, back to normal.

He turned back to his wolf form and climbed back in bed, placing his snout in the crook of your neck. He went back to a calming sleep.

When you woke up the next morning, you felt a wetness against your neck and heaviness on your body.

You shuffled to see that little pup and suddenly grew into a huge wolf that had taken over most of your body and bed.

His metal forearm was snuggly wrapped around your waist.

You slowly got out of the bed and went to the bathroom to get ready.

When you got out, you saw the wolf sitting by the bathroom door with, what looked like, an abandoned face.

He whined as soon as he saw you.

You bent down and laughed, scratching his head. “Oh little wolf, I would never go anywhere without telling you, you know that, right? And look at you! All… grown up in a night? Must be a miracle that have happened. But no worries, it's okay. You look more comfortable now than when you were a pup.”

Bucky rubbed his head against your hand.

His ears touched a fluffy thing and he turned to see that you were in nothing but a towel.

His primal instincts were trying to take over but all he did was let out a quiet growl to calm himself.

In his pup form, you would busy him with some task and change and he didn't really mind that but now he was back, all Bucky, and the attraction towards you was hard to deny.

You threw him a toy and thought he was distracted but his blue eyes were following your every move.

You had completely removed your towel and were moisturizing yourself.

The dips and curves of your body were being taken in by a certain blue eyed wild wolf. Your erect nipples and your glistened pussy was calling out to him but he held off.

Once you were done with moisturizing, you wore your traditional home pjs, shorts and tattered crop top.

You had decided to forego your bra and were just in your underwear.

Bucky was not someone who was good at holding off for this long so he turned and walked to the large alphabet paper to talk to you.

He had to let you know that you were living with a man, a shifter and not a pet.

You saw him walk to the paper so you brought out your own tiny pad to help you form sentences so you wouldn't get lost.

“I am not a wolf.”

You snorted at it but nodded your head to let him continue.

“I am a man.”

You got quieter because you had heard of shifters who were endangered and were mostly under hiding.

“I'm the Winter Soldier.”

You gasped.

“I don't mean you any harm but if you let me change i will explain.”

You nodded slowly and he shifted in front of you.

He was a god.

He was a completely naked beefy god on whom you want to jump but can't because of lots many reasons.

“I'm Bucky.”

Why the fuck is his voice so fantastic?

You could feel his voice vibrating through your wet pussy.

His cock is was right in front of your face and so close to grasp.

He was big and veiny.

You grabbed your bottle and drank entirely to quench your dry throat.

You got up suddenly, startling him and grabbed an old pair of men’s sweatpants and handed it to him with your cheeks burning red.

Even the sweatpants werent hiding his beauty.

He sat at the edge of your bed and patted next to him for you to sit down.

“I was lost when you found me. I stayed a pup because of my past but I was able to shift yesterday.”

He looked at you so innocently.

His blue eyes dripped with innocence and all you wanted to do was steal it but you held yourself off.

“I swear I would've told you the truth but it really takes a lot of effort for me to tap every letter and i didnt know if I could trust you after what I have been through.”

You pull him in a hug to comfort him.

His face is buried in the crook of your neck and your bodies are pressed together.

Your taut nipples were pressed tightly against his bare chest.

You felt him tighten his hold on you and he rubbed his nose against the crook, lazily kissing your sensitive spot.

“...Bucky…”

He lifted his head and brought his nose closer to yours and bumped it as if asking for permission.

You leaned forward and put your lips on his.

His primal instincts spurred and the kiss became more demanding.

“Tell me to stop, doll.”

“You're in charge, Bucky. Take what you want.”

He threw you in the middle of the bed and climbed on top of you, his lips not leaving your body.

He tore through your shorts, t-shirt and underwear, leaving you naked and writhing under him while his lips and teeth marked your body as his.

You moaned and mewled as he ate you out.

Your hand held his hair tightly, making him groan on your pussy, sending vibrations straight to your core.

“God, baby, you're so perfect.”

He loved eating you out so much and he kept at it till he made you cum three times, leaving you glassy eyed and panting.

Your naked bodies, pressed against each other, made the entire scene look like a painting.

“Are you sure?”

“Make me yours, Bucky.”

Bucky rubs his cock against your folds and your back arches, giving him the sweet sounds he's been listening to all day.

He slides his cock in and takes his sweet time, making you feel things your body had never felt before.

His lips move all over your body just like yours do to his.

He speeds up his thrusting and you moan out his name, making him go feral.

“Yes Bucky please.”

“So sweet, doll.” “So tight for me.” “not gonna last long, baby.”

His thrusts become irregular and you rub your fingers against your clit to match him.

You both cum together as he spills in you.

“Can I stay in you for a little longer?”

“Stay as long as you want, Bucky.”

“I want you.”

“You have me.”

“No no, not just like this. I want to be bound to you.”

“And how can you do that?”

“I mark you, bite you, bind you to me for life.”

“Do it, Bucky. I'm all yours to be bound.”

[angrythingstarlight]

Has Bucky ever came home to find Frankie just sitting in his home? Bee’s probably with Malyshka somewhere else in the house, and Bucky is annoyed to see this child

Mafia!Bucky can't catch a break 🤣

Bucky's home is his sanctuary. His respite from his business, from the Bratva. From everything. Within these walls, he's not the pakhan or CEO. He's simply your man and her Papa.

He loves coming home to his family. All his stress seems to melt away the second he steps into the foyer and he's greeted by the people he loves.

Which is why he's disconcerted. And a little upset with you. Because he should be wrapping his arms around you, cupping your face so he can steal a much needed kiss before hugging Bumblebee and listening to her as she tells him about her newest 'ventures.

Instead, he's staring down at a shifty little bastard wearing a Bluey t-shirt.

"Hi Mr. Bucky," Frankie says, jumping off the couch and skipping towards the mobster.

Bucky raises a brow. "Frankie."

Oblivious to the stoic expression on his face, Frankie stops in front him and smiles up at Bucky. "You wanna play with me?"

Bucky glances around the first floor searching for you. Bee. Anyone.

"I like your dattos. I gonna get a billion dattos when I grow up." Frankie rambles on, reaching up to touch the tattoo on the back of Bucky's hand. "Dis is my favorite."

"That's nice. Malyshka?" Bucky calls out, his eyes flitting between the interloper and the kitchen. He swears he heard a faint giggle coming from there. He lets out a sigh when Frankie holds his hand. Raising his voice slightly, he tries again. "Bumblebee?"

Silence.

Or it would be if not for the fact that Frankie is trailing after him.

"When I grows up, can I work with you? I can count really high and I know all my—"

Bucky makes his way into the kitchen, finding you and Bee putting snacks onto a bright pink tray, his gaze hones in on you, catching the flicker of guilty amusement in your eyes. Bee wiggles off the chair and runs to him. His lips instinctively pull into a grin at the sight of her happy face.

"Papa! You see my boyfrien's here." Bucky fights a shudder, keeping his smile in place as Bee continues. "He's gonna play with us all day Papa. You 'cited? Mommy said you was gonna be real 'prised to find Frankie." Her voice rises as she bounces on her heels.

All. Day. Really Malyshka?

"Oh I'm definitely feeling something," Bucky dryly intones.

He watches that tiny sliver of amusement bloom and spread across your face. You casually lift a shoulder at his stare as you saunter past him, placing a kiss on his bearded cheek on your way out. "Have fun."

Bucky grabs your waist, his lips descending to your ear. "I will. Tonight. When you're making this up to me," his deep whisper, tinged with heady promises, rolls over your skin, sending an icy shiver down your spine.

Just as quickly he releases you with a pat on your ass and turns to the toddlers. "What are we doing first?"

"We gotta get the dragons before they gets mommy."

"And dattos."

"Oh, I needs some new ones."

"Fight the dragons. Then I'll give you both new tattoos. Got it." His gaze warms at the sound of their cheers and he lets them pull out of the kitchen and down to the library where the dragons like to hide.

Bucky will never admit it but he did have fun. Doesn't mean you're off the hook though. He's a man of his word after all.

[literaryavenger]

Can I be him?

Summary: When Bucky finds something of yours, he hopes against hope that you feel the same way about him.

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Enhanced!Fem!Reader

Warnings: Language cause it's me. Fluff. A lot of angst. Idiots in love. Self-deprecating thoughts, both reader and Bucky. No use of Y/N. My poor attempts at being funny.

Word Count: 4.8K

A/N: It’s 3am where I live, so… Happy 107th Birthday to my favorite Supersoldier! Today I’m posting 2 Bucky fics because my baby deserves it, this one and another one sometime around the afternoon. Hope someone likes it! Thank you to my angels @ordelixx and @mrsbuckybarnes1917 that gave me so many ideas that helped me finish this. I love you🖤

Masterlist

Being an Avenger is not easy.

The long missions, the intense training, the weight of the world on your shoulders…

Everybody on the team has a different way to unwind after a mission: Steve draws, Clint and Natasha compete doing target practice, Thor sleeps, Sam plays video games, Bucky takes motorcycle rides, Tony and Bruce work on side projects in their lab, Loki reads, Peter does his homework and Wanda cooks with Vision.

For you, it’s going to the rose garden behind the Compound.

It’s a bit of a sanctuary for you, Tony allowed you to put tall hedges of roses with a gazebo-like structure in the middle of them facing the lake, only it’s entirely made of vines.

You made it yourself, that’s your power: you can manipulate anything plant-related. 

Everytime you finish a mission the team splits up as soon as the debriefing is over and you walk straight here.

You sit on the bench, also made of vines, take out your diary and start writing.

You write about everything, from details of missions to your feelings about the team. From things you did that you don’t want to forget to things that you want to do after you’re not so tired anymore.

The hedges hide you from view and the only thing you can see when you’re here is the lake.

Sometimes, after a particular difficult mission, you don’t even write. You just sit there and look out into the water, the sunshine or moonlight shining down on you, and you feel at peace.

It helps that nobody else ever comes here. The team understands it’s your safe space, and the agents are mostly scared of your powers ever since you grew a giant carnivorous plant and it bit an agent that squeezed your ass during training. 

The agent got both taken to the medbay and suspended on the same day, and you got the thanks of about a dozen girls that had the same problem with the same asshole.

You walk out of the conference room, the debriefing of the team’s latest mission just wrapped up, and like usual everyone scatters to their own after-mission ritual.

Today, though, you can’t concentrate on anything.

Your feet take you to the rose garden by reflex, but your brain doesn’t even register you’re there until you sit on the bench.

Today’s mission took a lot out of you, not just because of the amount of magic you had to use to get everyone out safely, but also because it was your fault the team was in so much danger in the first place.

You fucked up your task, Natasha had to step in and save your ass, moving away from her post and making her late for her own task and that derailed the entire mission.

At the end, you had to use your powers to take out the hundreds of Hydra agents at the same time, which is no small feat and made you almost pass out.

Everybody told you on the way home not to worry, the mission was successfully accomplished and everyone made it out safely, but you know that if it wasn’t for your screw up the team would’ve gotten in and out of base without so much as a scratch. 

Nobody had fatal injuries, thank God, but Sam got shot in the leg, Clint got stabbed and everyone else had various degrees of injuries because Hydra got the jump on the team.

Because of me.

That was all you kept thinking about. Your brain had a field day making up all kinds of scenarios where your mistake cost someone’s life, a few of them even had the entire team dying because of your stupidity. 

You were so caught up in your head that you didn’t even notice someone following you to the rose garden.

Not that you ever do. 

If there’s one thing Bucky Barnes knows how to do, is move around undetected. He’s a master assassin, he was trained for this for over 50 years, he knows how to be a shadow.

Except now he uses his skills for good during missions and, occasionally, to follow you.

Not in a creepy way, of course, just to check on you. At least that’s the excuse he always uses so he won’t have to admit to himself that what he does is, indeed, a little creepy.

But he can’t help himself, Bucky knew from the moment he saw you that he was fucked. 

The moment you walked into the room to meet the team his heart was yours. You stole it with one simple smile, with one look of your beautiful eyes.

You introduced yourself and shook hands with everyone, but when you looked at Bucky he felt like a light came on and it was just you two.

You shook his hand and he felt like he had to take it off and give it to you, it was yours now. His hand, his arm, his leg, his head, his heart, his soul. Everything he is was now yours, he just knew it.

Then you said his name and he could’ve died right there and then. It was the sweetest sound he’d ever heard, and it was barely two syllables. Every word you said, every laugh and sound that came out of your pretty mouth, Bucky felt like it was all for him. Nobody else mattered.

Bucky knew then he was in love.

But he didn’t know how to approach you. You were like a fairy, like a princess. Growing flowers, always smiling, baking, growing everyone’s favorite flowers and always willing to help, like growing Aloe when Wanda burned herself cooking, or Chamomile to help with Tony’s anxiety, or Valerian roots whenever someone was feeling down. 

You were like sunshine and he was terrified he’d kill your light. But he’d be damned if he’d let the world kill it either, he’d protect you with his life.

So he took to following you, making sure you were safe from a distance.

But it’s not like he never talked to you, the more time you spent with the team the more comfortable Bucky got around you and eventually you became friends.

Bucky knew you could take care of yourself, you were one of the strongest members of the team, but he didn’t like it when you were in your rose garden by yourself. The tall hedges made it impossible to see incoming danger, so he kept an eye on you just to be sure.

For his own piece of mind. And you never saw him.

That was Bucky’s actual way to unwind after a mission.

He’d tell everybody he was going for a ride on his bike, but he’d drive it through the woods around the compound and to the other side of the lake where he’d have a perfect view of you without you knowing. 

Deep down he knew it was a little creepy, he could just ask you if he could join you, but he felt like you needed your time alone without anyone else around, and he knew if he asked you, you’d say yes no matter what you were feeling, because that’s just the kind of person you are.

So Bucky watched you from afar, always careful not to be seen. He watched you write for hours, it relaxed him to see your beautiful face so concentrated.

Sometimes you’d laugh quietly at what you were writing and those were the only times Bucky was grateful for the supersoldier serum that allowed him to hear such a beautiful sound even with so much distance between you.

But it was torture for him when he knew you had a bad day. Sometimes you’d hug your knees and cry, Bucky could tell how much you’d need a hug, and it killed him that he couldn’t just walk up to you and hug you.

Everytime he sees you cry his heart breaks a little and he always tries to make you feel better when you walk back inside. He doesn’t ask you what’s wrong, he just tries to make you laugh. But all he wanted to do was dry your tears.

You did notice Bucky always seemed to act a little goofy when you're feeling down, like he somehow knew, but you never thought much of it.

You knew he was a very observant person, so you assumed he just saw your mood through your behavior better than most.

Bucky loves hanging out with you, even if it’s just as friends. You make fun of him like with everyone else, you don’t treat him like could explode at any moment, never walking on eggshells around him like most people do.

You’ve never been afraid of him, and he’s glad that you don’t treat him like glass. You treat him like everyone else, and it makes him feel normal.

Everytime time he hangs out with you, you take him back to a time where he was unbroken. You make him feel alive again.

And he falls more in love with you by the second because of it. You’re all he wants, he wants to have you and kiss your lips and never let anyone hurt you. That’s all he can think about, but he knows that’s not gonna happen.

He heard you talk to Natasha and Wanda, heard that there’s someone you’d gone on a few dates with. But Bucky knows that guy doesn’t deserve you, nobody does.

Even Bucky himself doesn’t deserve you, you’re too pure for anyone in this world, but if there’s someone that has any chance of making you happy, Bucky prays to God that that someone is him.

Bucky knows today’s mission shook you deeply. He knows you blame yourself, and no amount of reassurance will make you believe that everything is okay.

So today, for the first time, Bucky actually follows you. He can see your unfocused eyes even as you walk and he wants to be near you, just in case.

He almost walks to you when you curl up on the bench and start sobbing quietly, but he holds back not wanting to startle or upset you further.

He just listens to your soft cries until you stop and compose yourself. You sigh and get up, walking back to the Compound to take a much needed relaxing shower.

But you’re still so much in your own head that you don’t even notice you left your diary on the bench in the gazebo. 

Bucky did notice, though.

He’s tempted to call after you and tell you, but something deep down tells him not to. He waits until you’re gone and then walks to the bench, picking up your diary and opening it.

He doesn’t know why, he knows it’s wrong, these are your private thoughts, but he’s just drawn to it for some reason.

When he starts reading he notices you don’t mention any specific names, which makes sense because only you read it, you know who you’re writing about. He reads a page here and there, reading about your missions or lazy days. 

He reads about some memories with the team you wrote about, some he remembers and others he probably wasn’t there for, but seeing all these memories from your point of view does something to him.

It makes him feel connected to you, makes him feel like he’s reading your heart and soul, because he kind of is. Then he reads something that captures his attention completely. 

You write about eyes blue like the ocean and just as troubled, about a smile that could light up the world. You write about someone with a complicated past that never lost his spark, never lost his love for life. 

A man that went through hell, and never once took it out on the world. A man that didn’t ever blame the world, even when he had every right to, choosing instead to protect it. 

You filled pages and pages with everything you admire about this man, everything you love about him that you know he hates. 

And Bucky feels like every word you wrote, you wrote for him. But could this be him? Could he be the one you talk about in all your stories?

He wants to. He wants this to be him. He prays you’re talking about him. He wishes this could be him… Who is he kidding?

Of course it’s not me. 

It’s probably the guy you’ve been dating. Yeah, that’s it. You’re in love with that guy, that much is clear. 

Bucky gets to the page where you write about your dates with the guy, but he can’t read them.

He closes the diary, not knowing that you compared your date to Bucky every step of the way. Not knowing that you granted the guy a second date just to be sure he couldn’t compare to Bucky, and went on a third date at a coffee shop just to let him down gently.

Bucky didn’t read how you know he’s the one for you, he didn’t read his own name written in your handwriting, the only name in your whole diary because he’s the only person you never want to forget, even though you know you never will.

But Bucky didn’t read that.

He puts your diary back where it was on the bench and, with his heart broken and his hope that one day you could be his lost, he goes back inside and to his room.

It’s only when you go back to the rose garden after your shower that you notice you left your diary there, but don’t think much of it. Nobody ever comes here anyway, as far as you know.

After finding out you’re in love with someone else, Bucky can’t stop himself from acting differently towards you, which you don’t fail to notice.

It’s not like he’s mean, but your interactions get shorter, like he tries his best to end the conversation quickly.

He no longer sits close to you, no longer tries to make you laugh when you’re feeling down, doesn’t hang out with you as much during your down time and if he does, it’s never just the two of you anymore.

It’s silly to say, but you miss him.

Bucky knows he’s been distancing himself, he knows you’ve noticed and he can see it’s affecting you, but he’s doing this to protect himself.

He knows it’s only a matter of time before you present your boyfriend to the team, the man you’re in love with and he doesn’t want it to hurt more than necessary.

You decide not to push Bucky, knowing he has his reasons to pull away from you. Maybe he’s just trying to deal with all the stress the team’s been under and you don’t want to add any more to that, so you let him be.

A few weeks later the team’s on their sixth mission in just as many days and everyone is exhausted. You’ve been taking down Hydra base after Hydra base, because waiting too long meant losing your chance to shut down their operations for good before they got the opportunity to leave.

You’ve been dividing in smaller teams to take down the bases while still giving the team a chance to recuperate, but this last one was the biggest and required the whole team together, which sucked for you because you were in the last team with Steve and Bucky that took down a base just yesterday, so the three of you got barely a few hours of sleep while you flew to the last base.

You’ve cleared the base, all that’s left is the agents in the courtyard who are really going down fighting. The whole team is outside now, the Hydra agents giving you a hell of a fight. You’re using your magic against your better judgment, giant vines coming out of your arms like whips, covered in poisonous thorns. One touch of that and anyone would go down immediately, everyone except you.

Or at least that’s what you think.

As you’re fighting you can see an agent trying to sneak up on Bucky who’s fighting near you, so you quickly take care of it for him.

Bucky turns around and sees the agent down and then looks at you with that charming smile you fell in love with and winks at you. “Thank you, doll.”

That’s the friendliest Bucky’s been towards you in weeks and you can’t help but smile back with a small blush.

You can see the last agent standing coming at you from your peripheral vision and you quickly whip him with a vine, taking him down as soon as you can so you can turn back to look at Bucky, still smiling at you.

Bucky’s smile drops quickly, though, as he sees your face draining of any color. You barely have the time to register the sting of your own thorn on your arm that you’re already falling to the ground.

Bucky tries to catch you, but he gets thrown back by your magic that goes into defense mode, creating a wall of thorns to protect your now unconscious body.

The team doesn't know what to do, none of them know enough about plants to be sure that these thorns wouldn’t just kill them all.

The only one that would know that is you, the person that’s passed out, or worse, trapped in the midst of a cocoon of thorns.

“Okay, we need to find a safe way to-” Steve starts but cuts himself off almost immediately. “What are you doing?!”

Bucky doesn’t even turn around to answer, too intent on breaking the thorns around you with his metal arm, not caring that the thorns are ripping his clothes and scratching his face, all he can think about is getting to you.

He finally manages to get through to you, but nobody can follow because your magic regrows the thorns Bucky broke, trapping him with you inside the cocoon.

But Bucky doesn’t care, his eyes never leaving your face as he kneels behind you, running a finger softly along your cheek and shivering when he feels your skin is cold as ice.

His mind goes to the worst possibility, that there’s nothing he can do, but his brain gives him some hope reasoning that your magic wouldn’t be working if you were dead.

Right?

He snaps out of his thoughts when he feels the thorns around you vibrate, he takes you in his arms and shields you with his body from whatever is about to happen.

But the only thing that happens is the shade cast by the thorns gets replaced by sunlight. Bucky looks up and realizes Wanda used her magic to lift the thorn cocoon.

“You couldn’t have done that before?!” Bucky barks at Wanda with a glare while carefully picking you up to take you to the Quinjet.

“She’s not the dumbass that threw himself headfirst in a mess of thorns without even considering another course of action!” Natasha came in Wanda’s defense, though she seemed more amused at Bucky’s antics than annoyed.

As the team heads back home in the jet, Bruce examines you and lets the team know you’re still alive but in a sort of coma.

Their relief is cut short when Bruce makes it known that he has no idea when, or if, you’ll wake up.

As soon as the Quinjet lands you’re taken to the medbay and hooked up to machines, an IV in your arm to keep you hydrated.

Bucky holds your hand through it all, staying all night next to you just in case you wake up. He didn’t want you to be freaked out and alone, he wanted to be the first person to see your beautiful eyes open.

When morning comes, though, you’re still unconscious, but Bucky doesn’t lose hope. You probably need a good sleep.

That’s what he tells himself for two, three, four days.

That’s what he keeps telling himself for a week, two weeks. Never once leaving your side, not eating unless Steve brings him food and makes sure he eats before leaving, and using the bathroom of your room in the medbay.

He barely sleeps and, when he does, he dreams of you.

Everyone was getting worried about him, he refused to leave your side until one day Steve came into your room to tell Bucky there was something wrong with your rose garden.

Bucky was torn between staying with you and seeing what Steve was talking about, but decided that it would kill you if something happened to your roses so he had to make sure everything was okay when you woke up.

Because you’re going to wake up.

Bucky follows Steve to your rose garden, and his eyes widen in horror as soon as he sees it. The roses, the hedges, the vines.

Everything is dying.

Bucky’s heart breaks, only one thought in his mind. If your plants are dying, does that mean you’re slowly dying too?

No. That’s unacceptable. You’re not gonna die, not if Bucky has anything to do with it.

He takes it upon himself to take care of your garden, watering it and doing everything he can to keep the roses and vines alive, fooling himself into believing that this will keep you alive.

He stays on the gazebo day and night, sleeping on the bench, spending every waking moment trying to keep a hold of even the smallest part of you.

But it’s not enough. Nothing is enough.

Bucky loses track of how many days he’s been in your garden, sleeping maybe an hour at a time here and there, watering the roses every few hours and crying the rest of the time.

After all it’s his fault, if he hadn’t distracted you none of this would’ve happened. You’d be in your beautiful garden, probably with your boyfriend, and the only broken thing would be Bucky’s heart.

That he could’ve lived with. 

But how can he live with the knowledge that he caused your end? That he killed your light? That he killed his sunshine, his hope, the love of his life? He can’t live with that.

Not that he has to.

While Bucky’s spiraling while surrounded by dying roses, inside your room in the medbay you’re finally waking up after almost a month.

You open your eyes slowly, looking around you at the hospital-like room. There’s nobody around and, as you look at the window, you can see it’s really late at night.

You sit up and try to make sense of what happened while rubbing your eyes. The last thing you remember is Bucky’s bright smile, and then nothing.

You look down at your arm and see an IV, which you take out while frowning. How long have you been sleeping?

You carefully get off the bed and make your way outside to your rose garden, just to be sure everything’s okay. It’s not like anyone’s gonna stop you anyway.

When you get close, the moonlight shines on the hedges and you gasp at what you see. Your beautiful roses withering away, the gazebo made of vines dying too.

But the most confusing thing is the sobs coming from the bench, although no one’s sitting on it.

You get closer and see Bucky sitting in front of the bench while hugging his knees and crying softly. You frown and get a little closer before stopping, not wanting to startle him.

“Bucky…” You say quietly and his head snaps up, his eyes instantly meeting yours.

For a moment it feels like he’s trying to decide if you’re real, he reaches out and you extend your hand to take his. That seems to convince him and he gasps.

“Doll…” His voice is barely above a whisper, almost as if he thinks if he makes too much noise you’ll disappear.

“What’s wrong?” You ask him while getting a little closer to him, concern clear in your every feature.

It’s only when you get closer that you see his face full of cuts and you frown. Those are not just any scratches, it’s clear to you that they were made by thorns. “D-did… Did I do this to you?” 

You’re kneeling in front of him now, one hand still in his one the other comes up to trace the cuts in his face softly, but he takes your hand in his and kisses your palm.

“I’m okay…” He reassures you.

Just then he realizes, you’re fussing over him when you’re the one that’s been in a coma for a month. “Are you okay? How long have you been awake?” 

“I… I just woke up.” You tell him honestly, then look around at the dying roses and vines before looking back at him. “What happened to me?”

“You got stung by one of your poisonous thorns.” He says quietly, his thumbs rubbing circles on your skin while he refuses to let go of you. “You’ve been unconscious for almost a month.”

“A month?!” You’re shocked at the news, not knowing what to say or do, so you just stay there while letting the information sink in. The silence is broken by Bucky after a minute.

“I’m sorry about your roses… I tried to keep them alive, but…” He looks around with a hopeless expression. “I failed you.”

Your heart breaks a little. Does he really think he failed you?

You take a deep breath, then close your eyes and when you open them again a second later everything’s back to normal. The roses are as beautiful as ever, the gazebo just as majestic. It’s like nothing ever happened.

Bucky looks around in awe when he feels you take his chin and you make him look at you.

“You could never fail me.” You say firmly, wanting him to understand you mean it. You look at the cuts around his face and you can’t help the guilt and pain that you feel deep within you. “I’m sorry…”

“It wasn’t your fault.” It’s like Bucky can read your thoughts, he knows all you can see are your faults, and he wants you to know he doesn’t blame you for anything. “You weren’t even conscious. You have nothing to be sorry for.”

“I never wanted to be one of the people that hurt you…” Your voice is a whisper as a tear escapes you. “The world hurt you so much already… I never wanted to be part of that. You don’t deserve it.”

Bucky frowns. He feels like he’s heard those words, but where? No, he didn’t hear them. He read them. He read them in your diary, where you wrote about the man you’re in love with. Could it be possible?

Could I be him?

“It’s me…” He says lower than a whisper, his eyes locked on yours, and it’s your time to be confused now.

“What?” You ask him with a frown while wiping your cheeks.

“It’s me you’re in love with.” His voice is a little louder, but firm. He’s not asking you, he’s making a statement.

Your eyes widen in surprise, you almost take your hands away from his but his hold prevents you from doing that.

“I-I… What?” Is all you can bring yourself to say, confused as to why he’s so sure of it. Are you really that transparent?

“I read your diary…” Bucky says, guilt written all over his face, but at least he’s owning up to it. “You wrote about the man you love… and you wrote the same thing you just told me. It’s me, isn’t it? You love me back?” His voice is more hopeful now, his confident demeanor weavering.

“You… You read my diary?” You say, your mind still playing catch up.

It’s only a moment later that you register the ‘love me back’ and you don’t give him a chance to apologize or justify himself before you’re speaking again. “You love me?!” 

Bucky hesitates a moment but nods firmly. “I love you, doll. I’ve loved you since the moment I met you.” 

You feel like someone punched you and all the air has left your body. You have no idea what to say, so you don’t say anything.

Instead you lean in and kiss him.

Bucky wastes no time kissing you back, but a thought pops into his mind and he reluctantly pulls back. “What about your boyfriend?”

“Boyfriend?” You frown again, having no idea what he’s talking about. “I don’t have a boyfriend.”

“You don’t?” Bucky feels like a weight has been lifted off his shoulders and he pulls you to straddle him. “What about the guy you went on a few dates with?”

You narrow your eyes at him but decide to table the conversation about how he knows that for another time, so you smile at him and decide to just be honest with him.

“Do you honestly think that anyone could ever measure up to you? Because if you do, you’re an idiot.” Bucky grins and kisses you again. 

Maybe he is an idiot. But when he’s the idiot you’re in love with, how much of an idiot can he really be?

It looks like he can be him after all.

[galaxywannabe]

Listen I know I promised a Bucky fic and it's COMING I SWEAR but I need to get this Joaquín headcanon out of my brain because it's been bouncing around in there for like a week and I can't make it stop.

Imagine Joaquín and reader who constantly call each other babygirl.

At first it started out as a complete joke.

You walk into the Captain America office one day to visit him for lunch with a big ass grin on your face, strutting right up to his station.

"Hi babygirl, whatchu doin?"

His brow crinkles with bewildered amusement, a huff of a laugh escaping his lips as he stands to wrap his arms around you.

"Babygirl?"

You shrug, nonchalant, but there's a mischievous glint in your eyes. You'd been cooking up that greeting the whole drive over here, eager to see his reaction to the new petname.

"What? You call me that all the time, I thought I'd try it out on you. What do we think, does it fit?" You tease.

He can't even pretend not to be completely enamored by everything you do, his amusement unmistakable as he gets a grin on his face to match yours.

"Babygirl, huh? Yeah, no, I think it works. I think it's cool, it's manly for sure." He tries to look serious as he nods his agreement, but he can't pull it off with his megawatt smile.

-

It was just a stupid one-off joke to get a reaction out of him, but you can't help teasing him with it later on when you're at home in your shared apartment.

He pops his head into the bedroom where you're reading a book, looking slightly flustered as he rushes to get dressed for guys' night with about 5 minutes to spare.

"Babygirl, have you seen my watch?"

You smirk fondly at his disheveled appearance, button-down only half buttoned, wallet and keys hastily shoved into the back pockets of his jeans.

"I don't know, babygirl, have you checked the charger?" You sass, your brows raised expectantly.

He freezes for a moment, buffering a little at the rather obvious suggestion, and then his face breaks out into a grateful smile.

"Totally. I totally already checked there. Thanks, babygirl." He winks, dashing out of your room to grab his apple watch and - you're hoping - button the rest of his shirt.

-

From then on, it's just...a thing. An inside joke between the two of you. And honestly it doesn't take long before it's such a force of habit, you guys forget that it's weird for you to call your boyfriend 'babygirl'.

A few weeks later Sam is over at your place. Joaquín and him are sitting on the couch in front of some sports game you pretend to vaguely understand, chatting and exchanging stories. You're nearby, listening but trying not to intrude on the bonding moment. Your man calls over his shoulder, his eyes not quite able to leave the action on screen long enough to look at you.

"Babygirl, can you grab me another beer, please?"

You roll your eyes fondly. The man usually dotes on you hand and foot, but when it's game time, you don't mind taking a turn so he can keep watching balls go through hoops or whatever. You grab his requested beverage and walk it over, holding it out with a teasing smirk.

"This one's free, but you gotta pay for the next one, babygirl."

Joaquín just chuckles at your antics, accepting the cold beer with a grin.

"Man, the bartender here's really strict..."

That first time he hears you say it, Sam pauses for a second, confused, but brushes it off pretty easily. Maybe he'd misheard you. Torres didn't react, after all, and he definitely would have if you'd said what Sam thought you said...right?

But maybe an hour or so later, you do it again, and Sam knows it's not a fluke. You've been yawning heavily for the past several minutes, and it's pretty obvious you're fading fast from the way you jolt upright in surprise when Joaquín yells at a referee on the TV screen.

You sigh, finally admitting defeat. "Alright, I'm sorry boys, I think I've gotta call it an early night. You'll just have to let me know who won tomorrow."

You walk over to Sam first, and he stands to let you give him a hug. "Sam, so great seeing you as always. You're always welcome here to drink my beers and entertain my boyfriend."

He laughs at that, and you turn to said boyfriend next, leaning down to kiss his cheek with a sleepy smile.

"Will you please clean up out here when you guys are done?"

Joaquín nods, distracted by the screen but taking a moment to meet your eyes to indicate he's heard you. "Yeah, babygirl, 'course I will. Sleep tight, we'll try not to be too loud out here."

You snort, rolling your eyes. He can 'try' all he likes, your man doesn't stand a chance at maintaining a normal volume if his team starts to lose. You glance at the score on the screen, relieved to see they're up by a few points.

"Alright, I'll hold you to that. Goodnight, babygirl, I love you."

There's no mistaking the way he makes direct eye contact with you as you say it, or the way he smiles adoringly as he responds.

"I love you too, babe."

Sam's brain screeches to a halt, and he stares at you like you're two dogs who suddenly got up and started dancing the flamenco.

"Waitwaitwaitwaitwait. Hold up. Did you just call him 'babygirl'? Twice? And he let you?!"

It takes a second for you to even register what he's so worked up about, but when you do a Cheshire grin spreads across your face. You pause, exaggeratedly tapping your chin as you recall the past couple of hours.

"Hmm...yep. Sure did. Wow, only twice? That's honestly pretty tame for us, sometimes I feel like it's every other word out of our mouths," you chuckle, thoroughly enjoying both Sam's reaction and the brand new shade of red your boyfriend is turning.

Sam's mouth opens and closes a few times, bewildered by your nonchalance, the way you act like this is something normal couples do every day. Then he turns on Joaquín, shifting on the couch to face him better with an imploring gaze.

"Torres, man, you let your girl call you babygirl? That's her nickname for you, really?"

Joaquín looks like he'd rather be anywhere else right now, and if it wasn't so goddamn funny you would almost feel bad for him. Sam's his mentor, practically an older sibling to him, and he's always trying to impress the guy or emulate him in some way. But there is not one single thing that's cool about letting your girlfriend call you 'babygirl', and you can see the horror in poor Joaquín's eyes as he realizes that fact. He's never gonna live this down, and for a moment you even wonder if he'll try and deny it.

But your heart skips a beat when, after a moment of awkward silence, Joaquín just rubs the back of his neck and grins sheepishly, shrugging his shoulders like 'what are ya gonna do?'

"Uh...yeah, it is. It started out as a joke, but then it just kinda stuck, and now I honestly don't even notice when she says it, it's so normal" he admits, bright red but honest.

And goddamn if your heart doesn't grow three sizes that day. Cause your boyfriend just admitted in front of his hero that he lets you call him 'babygirl,' and he's definitely embarrassed, but he's trying not to be ashamed of it for your sake. Your grin melts to a soft, adoring smile as you look up at him, reaching for his hand and squeezing it encouragingly.

"You tell him, babygirl."

-

AHHH okay I'm so sorry I don't know WHY I couldn't get this idea out of my head thank you for humoring me. I wrote this on my phone in like half an hour so I know it's pretty sloppy and I know it's very dumb but for some reason it was one of the first thoughts I had after seeing the movie 😭

[hurtspideyparker]

Avengers Beach Day !

Tony is under a large beach umbrella, sat on a comfortable chair in bright red swim shorts and a flowy floral cover up. He has a large cooler with drinks, sandwiches and pickles. Also chips. Pepper is beside him reading a book about sustainability.

Natasha is in a simple black two piece swimsuit with large sunglasses, soaking in the sun.

"If anybody stares at my ass I will drown you and make sure your body never washes ashore," she warns as she lays out a towel and stretches out in the sun.

Peter and Thor are the first in the water, but only after Steve makes sure everyone has sunscreen on. "The water actually amplifies the harmful UV rays, so you should reapply in an hour. Don't worry, I'll remind you."

Peter and Clint tell Thor about chicken fighting, which delights him, and they are able to convince Steve to join so they can play. Peter sits on Thor's shoulders, and Clint on Steve's. It takes 4 rounds before Clint realizes Peter is cheating by sticking to Thor so he won't fall down. Peter and Thor switch places, but Thor still wins every time because well... muscles.

-

Bruce sets himself up on a blanket with a book but ends up falling asleep within twenty minutes. He sleeps for 2 hours and gets severely sunburnt.

-

Sam and Bucky sit down in two matching chairs a respectable distance apart, sunglasses on. Bucky is completely still for so long that Sam peeks over to see if he's asleep, his body casting a shadow over the soldier.

"Sam, I swear to god."

"Alright alright just checking, don't get your panties in a twist!"

-

Steve ends up floating around in the water peacefully, spread out like a starfish, while Clint and Peter show off their underwater handstand abilities to Thor. When Thor tries one for himself he ends up kicking Steve in the face. Peter and Clint can't stop laughing while Thor apologizes.

-

Natasha eventually joins the boys in the water, in which Clint begs her to play chicken with him because "all these guys are cheating super freaks!"

Natasha gets on Steve's shoulder and Clint on Thor's.

Natasha wins every round.

Clint grumpily complains about losing for the next half hour until he's distracted by food. (Tony makes fun of him for being such a loser on the ride home and Clint doesn't stop talking about how all his friends are freaks for the next 3 days).

-

Tony calls everyone in for some snacks and drinks, and Peter shakes his wet hair out all over Tony.

"Hey, hey! Watch where you shake that thing, I will hold your sandwich hostage!"

"You can't go to the beach and not get wet Mr. Stark, you're so spoiled. I barely talked you out of bringing that big ugly tent, it was practically a house."

"That's it. Thor, have another ham and cheese," he says as he tosses the sandwich to the god.

"No wait I take it back! Thor stop that's mine!"

-

Afterwards Peter finds a spot with damp sand to start building a castle.

"What are you, five?" Sam asks.

"Hey! I just found these old buckets on the shore and thought it would be fun."

"Mhm, keep telling yourself that boy scout."

"Like you could do any better!"

They stare at each other for a moment.

"Imma 'bout to whoop your ass so hard kid," Sam says as he snatches a bucket from Peter and gets to work a few feet away.

-

Bruce rolls over in his sleep like a gas station hot dog. His other side gets sunburnt.

-

"Kid, I'm ready for a swim. Kid?"

"Not now Mr. Stark, I'm in a sand castle building competition!"

Tony stares down at the teenager with his wild curls covered in sand, filling up a neon pink bucket.

"... move over. Where's your moat? You can't expect to win without a moat."

"The water just absorbs back into the ground," Peter says with a frown.

"Hm. We need insulation. Go back into the water and get stones and kelp. And driftwood for the drawbridge. How much time do we have? Can I get my tools?"

"Hey!" Sam yells, "you can't have help! And definitely no genius engineering toolkit."

"Fine, no tools. But I'm allowed Mr. Stark! Just get someone to help you too," Peter replies as he runs off into the water.

"Son of a- Barnes! Get your ass over here! We need to teach this spiderling some manners."

-

"You should reapply your sunscreen," Steve says while hovering near Natasha lying on her towel.

"Touch me and lose your hand."

-

"Tony, the sun's going to set soon, let's go for a nice walk down the beach."

"Not now Pepper, I gotta finish this brickwork," he says with his face millimeters from the sand as he chisels.

"I wanna go for a romantic walk with my partner. The sunset doesn't wait for anyone, even you Tony Stark."

"Mhm, sure after I finish this battlement."

Pepper huffs.

"Whatever, I'll just go with Natasha."

-

"BRUCE, YOU DIDN'T REAPPLY!"

"Wuh- ow, OW OW OW OW OW OW-"

-

"Okay, times up!" Peter announces.

Tony, Bucky, Peter and Sam all stand up. They step back, scrutinizing each other's work.

"Well obviously ours is better. We have a functional drawbridge," Tony is the first to point out.

"You guys are such freaking nerds. Ours is prettier, and taller. Buck found these beautiful baby conch shells," Sam points out.

"We need judges. Thor!" Peter calls out.

-

"Let's stop here for a second, I need to buy some aloe vera," Natasha points out as she and Pepper pass by a small street of local shops near the beach front.

"Oh, are you feeling burned?"

"No it's for Bruce."

"Now that I think about it, I haven't seen him much today."

Natasha keeps her smirk to herself, purchasing the soothing lotion before heading back out to the street.

"Maybe on our way home we can get some ice cream," Natasha says as she points out the shop. "Bet Cap would like some butter pecan."

Pepper giggles.

-

"Ah, finally, Nat! We need a third judge for our sandcastle competition," Sam waves her over as she and Pepper rejoin the group.

"You have Bruce, Thor, and Steve, what do you need me for?"

"Steve is corrupted!" Peter chimes in.

"He's a partisan of the veteran best friends party. For all we know Bucky used his secret Cap knowledge to rig their castle to the ice pop's liking," Tony explains.

Peter sets his glare onto the man in question, "bet you just go crazy for conch, don't you Steve."

"I'd really rather not be apart of this conversation," Steve tells them.

Bucky turns to the women. "Thor voted for us, and Bruce voted for them. You're the tie-breaker Nat."

Natasha hands the bottle of lotion to Bruce who thanks her sheepishly as she steps up to the castles. She circles them slowly, ducking her head and taking in every crevice.

"Functional?" she asks, pointing at the drawbridge.

"Yes ma'am," Tony smirks.

She steps up to the opposing castle.

"You buy these?" she points to the sea shells adorning the castle.

Bucky lifts his chin, "nope, swam for em. All the work was my own, just short of evicting the previous tennants."

Natasha nods before stepping back.

"I've made my decision. The winner..." they all hold their breath, even Pepper and Steve who have no stakes in the the competition.

"Is Tony and Peter."

Cheers errupt, along with the very loud complaining of the two losers.

"Oh come on man! Ours is bigger, and prettier!" Sam protests.

"Oh really Sam? Is size all that matters? Stark's is functional. I don't know about you but I like a little personality beneath the pretty pretty decorations."

Peter pumps his fists in the air with a "woohoo!" before launching himself at Natasha in tight hug.

"I knew I liked you," Tony interjects as he joins the pair's hug, placing a kiss on both Natasha and Peter's temple.

Bucky rolls his eyes at the gesture and hides an affectionate smile.

"Yeah yeah," Natasha chimes, "let's get out of here so you can buy us ice cream."

-

"What are you gonna go for Rogers? Butter pecan?"

Natasha and Pepper snicker at Tony's comment as they collect their own ice creams from the worker; a chocolate peanut butter cone and a raspberry and lemon sorbet respectively.

"Tony..."

"No, no, I got this. Butterscotch? Rum raisin? Pistachio?"

"I'll have you know my taste buds are very modern. Peter showed me this Thai place and now I'm a regular."

"I'll believe it when I see it," Tony says while grabbing his coffee ice cream.

-

"Kid you're making it too easy. You are genuinely a freaking toddler," Sam says when he spots Peter licking a bubblegum ice cream cone.

"If having a personality is childish then it's no wonder you got cookies and cream, ahembasicbitch." Peter coughs the insult out.

"How dare you, you overgrown Little Tikes ad-"

-

Bucky licks his mint chocolate chip ice cream contentedly in the back of the shop while he watches the others fight.

"What do you think they're on about now?" Clint asks from his left.

Bucky glances at the bubblegum cone in the archer's hand.

"No clue."

-

"AHAHHHAAH"

"What! Vanilla is the best flavour!" Steve tries to argue, although Tony's own laughter rings louder than all other conversation in the room.

"M-modern taste buds AH haha-"

-

Bruce watches with awe and slight concern as Thor happily licks his 3 scoop tall rocky road contentedly.

"You hungry man?"

"Aye, I do enjoy the mallow."

Bruce watches the tower lean in every direction, almost falling several times and looking more dismal with every lick.

He almost says something, but Thor always angles the cone perfectly just in time to save it. Instead, he watches silently while scooping a spoonful of cookie dough from his cup.

-

It seems they got the rest of their bickering out at the shop, as with tired and heat-soaked limbs they pile onto the jet for the ride home.

Tony looks back like a mom driving a mini-van.

"The baby's asleep," he smirks at Pepper who looks back at Peter.

The teenager is dead asleep, mouth wide open and head resting on Natasha's shoulder. She glares when she catches Tony's eyes on the pair and he looks away, glancing at the other passengers.

"I could've sworn Bruce's whole schtick was green. Is he rebranding to red?"

Steve looks over at Tony with a shameful pout, "he forgot to reapply."

Tony quirks an eyebrow but doesn't comment, settling back to cuddle with Pepper.

"Mission success," he whispers into her hairline with a soft kiss.

[bucky-barnes-diaries]

Mrs. Barnes

Pairing || TFATWS!Bucky x Female!Reader

Summary || You and Bucky enjoy a lunch break together.

Word Count || 1103

Contents & Warnings || Fluff — a little mention of smut and angst, no other warnings.

Disclaimer || English is not my first language so I apologise for any mistakes or misunderstandings!

TFATWS!Bucky Masterlist

You were running a little late to meet up with Bucky for a quick lunch break. He was supposed to work some intel with Sam all day for an upcoming mission, but he managed to get a quick break away from work which he wanted to spend with you. He had called you up an hour ago, his deep voice warming your heart even through the phone, to see when you were having your lunch break at work so that you and him could eat together at your favorite cafe—that cozy little place with the exposed brick walls and the smell of freshly ground coffee beans.

You were only a few minutes late, but you knew Bucky had limited time so you were stressing a little bit, wanting to spend as much time with him as you could. Your heart was already beating faster at the thought of seeing him.

As you walked into the cafe, the bell above the door announcing your arrival, you saw him sitting at your favorite table in the corner—the one by the window where the afternoon sun created a perfect golden halo around him. His nose was deep in a book—his original copy of The Hobbit, the worn cover showing years of love and countless re-reads.

"Hi, babe. I hope you haven't been waiting too long. I tried to get here as soon as possible," you said, slightly out of breath from your quick walk.

As you sat down in your chair, shrugging off your jacket and letting it drape over the back, Bucky put his book down and reached for your hand. His metal hand glinted in the sunlight as he brought your hand to his lips, giving it a lingering kiss at the back, his stubble tickling your skin. His gentleman gestures made your heart flutter, sending waves of warmth through your entire body. Even after all these years together, he never stopped making you feel special and loved, treating you like you were the most precious thing in his world.

"I've waited decades for you, my dear love. I can wait a few more minutes," he said while giving you that boyish grin that made your heart almost jump out of your chest, his blue eyes twinkling with affection.

"I was only five minutes late you over dramatic ass," you teased, giving his hand a reassuring squeeze to let him know you were joking, which he knew from the way your eyes crinkled at the corners.

"But I'm your ass, right?" he teased back, wiggling his eyebrows in that ridiculous way that only he could make endearing, making you giggle.

"Yes you are, Bucky. My one and only."

Although you and he were teasing each other in this moment, his remark was his truth. He had told you time and time again, usually in quiet moments late at night when his guard was down, that he would go through all those painful and lonely years all over again if it meant he would always find his way home to you.

"Alright, what should we get then," you asked, glancing down at the slightly worn menu. "The club sandwich sounds delicious. Don't you think, babe?" Bucky was only staring at you, not even paying attention to the items on the menu as he was busy admiring your beauty, his eyes soft and full of love.

"Hmm, you look so good today, Mrs. Barnes." Ever since your wedding a month ago, a small intimate ceremony in Brooklyn where you both had shed happy tears, Bucky haven't stopped calling you that. He was so proud and grateful that you wanted to take his last name. He never pressured you to take it, but you wanted nothing more than to be Mrs. Barnes. It gave you butterflies every time he called you that, making your heart soar.

Looking down at yourself, you were wearing the most basic clothes you owned, opting for a little more comfort than glamorous while at work. Your hair and makeup were done as simple as possible, just enough to look presentable.

"I know what you're gonna say, doll. That you don't look anything special right now, but this is the most beautiful to me. Your natural beauty is breathtaking. You look gorgeous when you get all dolled up as well, but you like this, is my favorite, Mrs. Barnes." His voice was soft but sincere, filled with genuine adoration.

You felt heat rush to your cheeks at his words, a smile coming across your lips, your heart swelling with love for this man.

"Hmm, thank you, Mr. Barnes. You don't look so bad yourself," you uttered, nibbling your bottom lip.

He was wearing a black t-shirt that clung to his torso like a second skin, his defined muscles etched in the material. His biceps appearing to almost burst through the shirt, the metal arm gleaming subtly under the fabric. You had been eyeing him ever since you sat down, practically drooling at how the shirt stretched across his broad chest. You shook your head, snapping yourself out of your desire.

"OK, but seriously, what are we ordering to eat. We don't have much time together and I'm starving," you said, getting back on track with the lunch and looking down at the menu once more, trying to focus on the words instead of your gorgeous husband.

"I want to eat you, doll," he said with desire in his tone, his voice dropping an octave lower, sending shivers down your spine.

"Well, if you manage to make it home tonight, I might give you a taste, pretty boy," you teased, winking at him, enjoying the way his pupils dilated at your words.

"Such a tease, baby."

"Always."

— — — —

After lunch, you walked out hand in hand to his sleek black motorcycle that was parked outside. You stood on your toes, wrapping your arms around his neck while his strong hands found your waist, holding you firmly to him, the cool metal of his hand a pleasant contrast to the warmth of his other. He gave you a passionate, slow kiss, not wanting to leave you just yet, his lips moving against yours with practiced tenderness.

"I'm gonna miss you, Bucky."

"Me too, doll. I promise I will try to make it home as soon as I can. You owe me a taste, remember," he said, giving you a wink before finding your lips again for a final kiss, this one deeper and more promising.

"I love you, Mr. Barnes," you mumbled against his lips, breathing in his familiar scent.

"And I love you, Mrs. Barnes."

Thank you for reading 🖤 Feedback through a comment is highly appreciated! Or let me know through an anonymous ask if that feels more comfortable. As well as a reblog to share my work with other people! I would really appreciate it 🖤

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[buckybuckyboo]

Tough mission

Word count: 1,370

Summary: After the boys had a tough mission they come home to you and you are just what they needed.

Warnings: Unprotected sex. Smut. Dom Steve? Sweet Bucky.

Steve and Bucky have been away on a top-secret mission for over a month. They can't contact you, Every day you are worried about bad news. Natasha will text you occasionally, but it's only that the mission is still ongoing, and that both are still alive. At least they are alive, right? You can't wrap them in bubble wrap but you would in a heartbeat. The both of them would laugh at you for trying to protect them but deep down, that's what they love most about you. It was one of their toughest missions and they just wanted to be home with you curled up in bed with nothing else to do. When they had finally finished their mission, they headed straight home to you. Steve said the paperwork could wait and Bucky agreed.

It was very late when they made it home, you were already fast asleep in bed. Steve was first up to you while Bucky decided to shower to wash the mission away. Steve ran up the stairs and into your room. He stood in the doorway looking at how beautiful you looked while sleeping. You knew missions were stressful for both of them and you told them "Take what you need". You knew your safe word if you didn't want them to. Steve's cock was straining against his pants as he looks at you. As he makes his way over to the bed, he rids himself of his clothes. Grabbing the covers and throwing them back off you. He leans over you on the bed kissing the back of your neck, pulling your shirt up, and kissing down along your back.

It wakes you slightly feeling the sweet kisses on your skin. Trying to turn around to him but Steve pushes you back so you are face down"Stay just like that baby" "Steve?" "Yeah it's me baby" he whispers sliding his arm under your hips and probing your ass in the air. "Just like that baby". He pulls your panties down and positions himself behind you. "Steve? Are you - OH!" he buries his cock deep inside you. "That's it, baby, you can take it I know you can" He feels your pussy clench around his cock as he builds a fast, rough pace fucking you. Your hands gripping the sheets. Your breath hitches in your throat as you feel his cock slip deeper inside you. "That's it, baby. I know, I know. You can take it cause you're my good girl. Right baby?

Trying to raise your head off the bed but Steve pushes you back down, keeping his hand on the back of your head as he fucks you deeper. His other hand gripping your hip hard, sure to leave some bruises to look at later. His movements become sloppy, You know that he is close. You can feel his cock twitch inside you. Burring his cock deep inside you as ropes of cum paint your walls. He leans down breathlessly as he kisses the back of your shoulder. Finally let go of the sheet and relax, trying to catch your breath. Before you can speak to him he kisses your shoulder again, gets off the bed, and leaves the room. Laying there for a moment trying to decide if you should follow. Resting your hips back down on the bed and pulling the covers back up.

Laying on the bed trying to decide when is the best time to go check on Steve, or if you should check on him. Your thoughts were interrupted by a soft knock on your door. So soft it would barely be heard. "Come in," You say softly and the door opens. "Hey doll, I'm sorry did I wake you?" You can't help but smile. "Hi Buck, no I was awake. Steve was here" "Oh, do you want me to leave?" Sitting up in the bed and pulling the covers back "Please don't leave" while holding your hand out to take his. He slips in beside you, laying you back and laying his head on your chest. "What happened baby?" "Tough mission" "Are you hurt?" "No, we are both fine. I don't know about Steve but I- I just missed you so much"

That makes you smile and kiss the top of his head while running your fingers through his damp hair. "I'm so glad you both are home safe and sound" He leans up kissing you softly. You can tell he's holding something back but you don't wanna push him. "I missed you too baby, I had Nat text me when you updated the mission. So, at least knew you both were still alive" His eyes look into yours in the dim light of the room. He leans in kissing you again deeply, full of want and need. He stops, resting his forehead against yours. "I'm sorry, I should let you sleep" You capture his lips in yours again cupping his face with your hands. "Take what you need Bucky, what do you need?" He's silent doe a moment. "I- I need you" "I'm right here baby"

"Are you sure?" "Of course I'm sure" he kisses you again then moves down your body, pulling your sleep shirt up to suck on your nipples. Moving his lips down your body more hooking his fingers into your panties and sipping them off. When he comes back up to kiss your lips again you shove his sweatpants down and wrap your hand around his cock and gently stroking. Helping him line up at your entrance. His eyes are on yours as he slowly pushes in, and your eyes flutter closed. He waits while you adjust to him, kissing your lips softly and brushing your hair back. Looking into his big blue eyes, you smile up at him softly His hips move slowly back out and back in again, dragging a soft moan from you.

He captures your lips with his, swallowing your moans. His right hand is on the back of your neck and his left is placed on your hip keeping you in place. Whispers were shared between both of you "You feel so good Bucky" "I missed you so much doll" His breath fanning over your face every time his cock fills you. His head falls into the crook of your neck as his pace picks up. Sucking marks into your neck. "Please baby, please cum inside me" moaning into his ear. You feel him bite down on your shoulder as he coats your walls with his cum, feeling him twitch inside you sending you over the edge. He lays on top of you panting as you stroke his hair. His big hand grabs the side of your face as he kisses you sweetly;. Laying him down beside you, looking into his eyes "Rest baby, I got you" Kissing his forehead.

You watch him as he slowly slips off to sleep. Watching his body relax and leaning against his chest listening to his heartbeat to help you drift off to sleep. In the morning you woke up first and admired how peaceful Bucky looked. You kiss him softly, cover him up, and leave the room to look for Steve. There was no sign of him in the spare room but you heard noise coming from the kitchen. Make your way downstairs, sewing Steve in the kitchen flipping pancakes. "Good morning handsome," you say with a big smile on his face. He stops what he is doing and turns to you. "Good morning baby. I'm so sorry about last night" Moving closer to him and wrapping your arms around his waist hugging him tight.

Looking up at him and cupping his face, you can tell he feels bad. "Steve, it's okay. Bucky told me it was a tough mission. I am all yours remember?" He smiles and kisses you "I know baby, thank you. I made your favorite! Take a seat!" "Thank you, baby!" Sitting at the table and watching as he puts some pancakes on your plate. "Should I go wake Bucky?" "Nah, let him sleep. Gives me more time with you" You lean over kissing him "I'm so glad you are home" "Me too baba, me too"

[holylulusworld]

Indifferent (2)

Summary: Your father wanted a bond between you and the Barnes Empire. No matter what.

Pairing: Mafia!Bucky Barnes x Wife!Reader

Characters: Thor Odinson, Winnifred Barnes

Warnings: arranged marriage, angst, mentions of impotence, arguments, mafia au, a hint of violence, strong reader, jealousy

Catch up here: Indifferent (1)

Indifferent Masterlist

Bucky is taken aback at your behavior. You’re a brat, but you never openly talked back or yelled at him. It’s simply not your style.

“What did you say?”

“Oh, you’re dull too?” You smirk darkly when he tightens his hold on your arm. “I said make me.” Bucky blinks. His features darken and he’s close to fulfilling his promise when you use the momentum to knee his groin. “FUCK!”

He whines and drops his hand from your arm to cup his crotch with both hands. Tears well up in his eyes, and he whines like a wounded animal.

“Well, now you definitely are impotent,” you flash him a smile. “Aw, you should put ice on that, darling.” You pat his cheek, earning a growl from your husband. “Don’t wait up for me, baby. I’m going to have a little fun outside these dusty walls.”

Pain radiates through his crotch. Bucky feels like he’s going to throw up, and his insides churn. Not only from the pain but the fact that he’s unable to stop you from leaving.

“I dare you to leave,” he yells after you. “Y/N, come back or I swear I’ll hunt you down.”

You turn around to blow a kiss at Bucky. “I love you too, baby. Have a great day. You really should put ice on that. We don’t want your tiny wiener to fall off. I’d be a shame.”

“I will kill her,” he grits his teeth and breathes through the pain. “If she doesn’t come back within the next minutes, I’ll spank her ass until it’s raw, and she can’t sit on her bratty ass any longer.”

“OH my God,” you whimper. “This feels so good. Please don’t stop…don’t you ever stop!”

“He won’t stop until you relax, Y/N. He’s the best in town. Just look at his large hands,” Winnifred chuckles. She dips her head to look up at the tall masseur. “Thor, my dear. I need you to knead all the knots and kinks my stubborn son caused out of my lovely daughter-in-law.”

“Your wish is my command,” the tall blonde flashes Winnifred a stunning smile. His blue eyes sparkle, and he drops his eyes to your shoulders. “She’s so tense, but I’ll make her relax. Trust me. I’m a professional.”

“I feel like I’m floating,” you sigh dreamily, completely lost in the feel of Thor’s hands on your body. “I’m boneless but happy.”

“That’s the goal,” your mother-in-law grins. “I’ll leave you to Thor now, Y/N. You’re in capable hands.”

“Yeah…” you murmur sleepily. “Perfect hands…perfect…so perfect.” You close your eyes and forget about your marriage and that you left your husband with more than a bruised ego. “I’ll deal with the bastard later.”

“Relax,” Thor leans over your body to purr in your ear. “No thinking, sweetness. Just feel. I need you to shut your mind off and let me rule your body.”

“It’s yours,” you slur. “All yours…”

You’re walking on air when you return to the place you call your prison, not a home.

After Thor was done with you, it felt like all the sorrows and Bucky’s ignorance just vanished. You decided to ignore him for as long as needed. The moment your father retires, you’ll take over his empire and file for divorce.

What’s a few more years with an indifferent husband – right?

“YOU!” Bucky is back on his feet. Or rather, his balls don’t hurt anymore. While you spent the day with your mother-in-law, he tried to find a way to pay you back. A shame he didn’t come up with a good plan yet.

“A good night to you too, husband,” you don’t let Bucky ruin your mood. Your body feels like you are reborn after Thor worked his magic. “I had the best day ever.”

“You are…” He sizes you up and frowns. “You’re glowing…and…you’re so relaxed.” Bucky sucks in a breath. “What did you do?”

“You mean who did I do?” you can't fight the dopey grin creeping on your face. It’s all Thor’s fault. You feel like you’re high on the good stuff. Or maybe you just enjoyed his hands all over your body. “Damn, that man has magic in his hands.”

“Hands? Man?” The wheels in Bucky’s head begin to spin. He balls his hands into fists, and growls. “If you fucked that gardener, I’ll kill you!”

“Gardener?” You blink a few times. “Nah, masseur, baby.” You giggle and turn to make your way toward your wing of the mansion. “I’m telling you; he’s got more power in his thumb than any guy in their hands.”

“Thumb?” Bucky follows you, hot on your heels. He limps a little while walking next to you. “Who used his hands on you? Where have you been? What did you think going out there fucking that asshole!”

“Winnifred was so right,” you sigh dreamily at the memory of the tall blonde hunk. “His hands are the best remedy. I think I’ll visit him twice a week from now on.”

“My mother?” He stops in his tracks to watch you walk toward the west wing. There’s a sway in your hips, and he can’t help but wonder if another man gave you what he denied his wife for so long. “She got you a callboy?”

“MASSEUR!” You twirl around to glare at Bucky. “Do not call Thor a prostitute! He’s a professional and would never cross a line. This man gave me something you never could!”

“What’s that?”

“Caresses!” You sniff. “It wasn’t romantic or sexual, but today I felt like myself for the first time since I married you. What a shame that a stranger made me feel like that, not you.”

He wrinkles his forehead. “Caresses?” Bucky thinks about the possibility of losing you to a masseur. His ego couldn’t take it, nor his reputation.

The worst is a green-eyed monster clawing its way to the front of his mind. Another man put his hands on you, and he can’t stand the thought.

“MOTHER!” Bucky storms inside his parents’ house. He’s fuming, and close to losing his cool. Maybe he already lost it on his way toward their house, he's not sure about it. “How dare you bring my wife to that callboy!”

Winnifred lifts her eyes from the book she tried to read. She smirks knowingly when her son starts to throw a tantrum like an angry toddler losing their favorite toy.

“Thor is a masseur, Jamie,” she coos and goes back to reading her book. “If you do not help your wife relax and make her feel good, I must help that sweet woman. That poor thing is touch-starved thanks to you.”

“You hired someone to have sex with my wife, mother! What in the world!”

“Jamie," she closes her book and sighs. “Not every touch is about sex. I raised you better. You should know that a human being needs more than air to breathe and food to fill your belly. We are not meant to remain untouched, unloved, unhugged…”

She slowly rises from her seat to walk toward her son. Winnifred pats his cheek, and sighs once again.

“I don’t understand your behavior, Jamie. She’s beautiful, smart and caring. What did Y/N ever do to you to deserve your hatred? She won’t admit it, but this situation is killing her. Don’t you see that she’s like a flower withering away in the shadow of your hatred?”

Part 3

Tags in reblog.

[godmadeaterribleerror]

Chapter 4 - Too Much Green

Series Masterlist - Main Masterlist

Author's Note: Chapter 4 doing what it always does in my writing. Enjoy!

Chapter Title from Fame < Infamy by Fall Out Boy

Word Count: 12.3k

Chapter Summary/Warnings: Bucky has a talk with Sam, and you adapt. Contains usual tags.

Tags: Bucky Barnes/Female Reader, enemies to friends to lovers, canon divergence, slow burn, smut, angst, fluff

Chapter 3 - Chapter 5

Read on A03!

Bucky didn’t know who decided Sam should be allowed to have an office, but he needed to have very firm, loud words with them.

Steve had never gotten an office, and he’d been perfectly fine. Sam barely even used the office. He kept it because he liked saying my office with a smug expression, and making Bucky sit in the waiting room like this was a doctor’s appointment and not a serious, time sensitive meeting. 

Because the sun was going to rise soon, and Bucky wouldn’t be following Her to work. He’d go back to his apartment, and do flat, mundane things to fill his time. Sam would find someone else to trail Her around, and She’d probably make their lives living hell, and they’d stick around because they knew how to do that.

Bucky had warned Sam he wasn’t made for this. That he’d literally been designed to hunt and kill, not shield and protect and care for. This was how it would’ve ended anyway, but he’d hoped—just for the sake of his own, fragile anger and resolve—that it would’ve crumbled because She caved. Because Bucky would’ve been right. But he hadn’t even lasted three weeks before everything had fallen apart, and She’d shot him in the gut like a sick dog. 

He’d shot himself in the gut. He’d been the paranoid asshole, and She’d gotten exactly what she’d wanted. Bucky didn’t have enough will to push it, and he didn’t have the strength to push Her. She was… stronger than he’d expected. And he could still see Her shaking slightly, still hear the fury in Her voice echoing off the vacant, blank walls of his apartment. 

It wasn’t guilt or shame, burning and crawling over his skin. It couldn’t be. He had nothing to be guilty of, because he’d been doing his job. Checking all the vulnerabilities. Making sure everything was in its proper place, including Her. It didn’t get to matter than She was beautiful and smart and bursting with a wrath that seemed bigger than the world. It mattered that She’d been lying, and hiding things. 

Things that didn’t seem that important now, when he’d been so goddamn wrong, and the image of Her in the office—in the dark, burning up from within in a way Bucky could see—seemed to be branding itself onto his brain.

Things that really didn’t have to matter to him at all anymore, because Bucky was done. He’d gotten out of it. He wouldn’t be breaking his word to Sam—She’d kicked him out, he hadn’t just abandoned his post—and he could just keep going through the motions until things, slowly, became better again.

And this would be fast. He’d tell Sam that the little arrangement had been a disaster—he’d throw in a I told you so, just to really sell it and bury down how he still felt Her teeth marks over his lungs—and go home. Maybe go to the grocery store. He’d never have to step foot in that godawful Subway again, or pretend he couldn’t see all those old, skin-sagging assholes scanning over Her body as she moved, because that wouldn’t be his business. He’d hear Her name in passing in the future and think nothing of it. Sam might mention one day that they’d worked out the Hydra thing, and Bucky would shrug because it wouldn’t be his fucking problem. 

He definitely wouldn’t check, because he’d have other, more important things to do.

He couldn’t think of any right now, but he would. He’d find some. 

That was how this whole getting better thing was supposed to work, and Sam was always on his ass about it anyway, so really this was an improvement for everyone. Sam got to find someone who would actually be good at watching Her. She’d probably have a lot of free time on Her hands, now that She wasn’t putting an impossible amount of effort into making Bucky go insane. Bucky would… Maybe he’d take another online college course. He’d heard Her say a lot of big, weird words and phrases that couldn’t possibly be real while he’d stood guard at Her door. There was probably an English class or something, and he could learn a bigger word that She didn’t know, just so he could throw it in Her pretty, annoying face-

He wasn’t going to see Her again. He didn’t know why his brain kept acting like he’d walk behind Her to the subway in the morning—he’d almost walked to Sam’s office instead of using his motorcycle, as if he’d been ready to go to Her apartment after—because he wouldn’t. He was free.

He kept seeing Her eyes, staring at him in an imprinted, faded picture in his head—full of that thing, narrowed in anger and unblinking, like She could shred him apart with a thought—but he’d never have to hold Her glare again. 

Everything would go back to normal.

The clock in Sam’s waiting room kept ticking. On and on, taunting Bucky and making his hands fist in his lap. He hated that sound. It pushed itself deeper and deeper and deeper into his brain, and it was like the click of a safety on a gun, or the tap of a doctor’s pen against their paper as they watched him. Observed him. Looked into him and saw the Solider and nothing more, figured out how to grab his anger by the throat and pull it to the surface, until angry was all Bucky could manage to be-

Something snapped through the air, and when Bucky looked down, he’d broken his water bottle. 

Sam had given him that water bottle. Something about hydration being important for robots too. 

Now Bucky was going to have to tell Sam two bad things. And they only had two damn hours until someone had to walk Her to work, because Bucky wasn’t going to but if the Hydra threat was real, She shouldn’t be allowed to just wander the Subway alone. She could be scary—unreasonably so, a little like a bird morphing into a dragon without warning—but Hydra wouldn’t care.

If they knew who She was, the dumb little disguises of sunglasses and baseball caps wouldn’t work, and Bucky didn’t trust Her not to do something stupid like put in earbuds so She couldn’t hear anyone coming. 

She listened to Her music too loud, all the time. It was another thing in his log, that Sam should tell Her to stop doing that, because it was a health hazard, and if She got kidnapped because of it, that would be really fucking annoying. Sam would get all angry, and they’d have to deal with all the assholes at Stark Industries for capturing their princess, and Bucky would probably have to save Her, and she wouldn’t even say thank you because She hated him-

His pants were wet. Cold and sticking to his skin, because he hadn’t stopped squeezing the broken water bottle, and the clock was still ticking, and Sam still wasn’t opening the goddamn door-

His name was James Buchanan Barnes. It was 3am on a Monday, and Sam’s office has very ugly, gray carpets. He liked that he’d been able to ride his motorcycle here. He disliked the little cactus Sam had put in the corner of the room, because it felt like it was taunting him. He needed Sam to open the door now, before he broke the clock and the crushed the cactus. He wanted this to all be done with, so he could go back to a routine that didn’t make him want to jump off a building and drag Her down with him.

“Buck?”

Bucky’s head turned to see Sam frowning at him from in front of the elevator, a soft ding ringing through the air as the doors closed behind them.

Sam hadn’t even been here. Bucky could’ve just broken into his apartment.

That was annoying. 

“Man, it’s two in the morning, what are you doing here?”

“Three in the morning.” Bucky grunted, pushing to his feet, and Sam just rolled his eyes. 

“Yeah, and that’s such a big difference-“

“Sam.” Bucky crossed his arms, keeping his voice as flat as possible. “We need to talk.”

Sam only raised his brows. “Do we?”

“Yes.”

“If this is about what I think it is,” Sam moved past Bucky, opening his office door with a shrug. “I don’t think we do need to talk. I think you should be headin’ home, Buck, before-“

Sam said Her name, Bucky felt a muscle in his jaw tick, and he cut Sam off before this dragged on longer than it needed to. This should be quick. Bucky should be home—alone and bored and back to routine—before the sun was up.

“I’m not doing that anymore.”

Sam stopped in his steps, running a hand over his face as he turned to Bucky with a glare.

“Bucky, you promised me you wouldn’t fuckin’ quit on this-“

“I didn’t quit.” He snapped. “I got fired.”

“Fired? Nobody can fire you, man, that’s not how this-“

Bucky said Her name, and it sounded a little smoother off his tongue this time. But now it was bitter, laced with a memory of Her spitting at him with cold hatred that he’d really, truly earned. “She fired me.” Bucky muttered, forcing himself to hold Sam’s gaze. “Said she’d do the lockdown, but I don’t believe her, so I’d send someone to make sure she’s-“

“Bucky.” Sam’s voice wad low. Firm. Serious. That couldn’t be good. “What’d you do.”

“Why do you always assume I did something-“

“Cause you usually do something! What did you do-“

She’d told Bucky he could lie. Tell Sam She was impossible to work with, or had thrown a stapler at him. 

It was an incredibly specific example. It would probably work just fine. 

Bucky couldn’t manage to say it. He’d been the asshole. He’d crossed a line, and part of recovery was supposed to be telling the truth. He didn’t want to tell the truth, but he also tried to let a poorly crafted story fall out of his mouth, only to stare at Sam as the words lodged in the throat.

Lying had always made his gut twist just a little. A little voice that sounded like Steve would always whisper that good men didn’t lie.

Bucky wasn’t a good man.

And that just made this so much fucking harder.

“Bucky.” Sam grunted, narrowing his eyes. “You don’t start talking now, and I’m gonna call her in so we can all have a chat together.”

Bucky rolled his eyes. “So she’s allowed to be up at three-“

“She’s up at three anyway. And she’s not waiting for me in my office like a stalker-“

“I am not a stalker-“

“You’re lookin’ at me like one. Just-“ Sam sighed, shaking his head slightly. “Spit out whatever you did, man, I’m sure it ain’t that bad-“

“I broke into her office.” Bucky grunted, the challenge of not that bad somehow spurring the truth out of him in a second. “She caught me. I got fired.”

Sam blinked at him. “You- is breaking into offices a full time job for you now or somethin’?”

Bucky scowled. “No. And I didn’t break into your office, Sam, I was in the waiting room-“

“You were the only asshole in the damn building, I’m counting it. And that’s not the point, Bucky, what the fuck were you doin’-“

“Thought she might be Hydra.” He muttered, his words pushed through his teeth. “Was looking for evidence.”

“Evidence.” Sam repeated, his voice low and taut, and Bucky nodded.

“Desk seemed like a good place to find it.”

“And did you?”

Bucky blinked at that. He’d expected the yelling to a start here. “Uh-“

“You find the evidence that she’s Hydra, Bucky?” Sam’s voice was too flat. Bucky was pretty sure this wasn’t a real question. “Find her red ledger, the big file readin’ I’m Hydra?”

He actually had looked for that. 

Sam didn’t seem genuinely interesting in hearing about it, though.

“No.” Bucky muttered. “Like I said, she caught me and tossed me out-“

“You tell her you thought she was Hydra?”

Bucky managed to hold Sam’s firm, unwavering gaze, to shrug like this was nothing, and ignore the turn of his stomach as the vision of Her—almost feral in the dark—flared in his mind.

“Maybe, yeah.”

“Jesus Christ, Bucky.” Sam ran a hand over his face, and he wasn’t angry. Bucky had seen Sam angry before. 

This felt more like disappointed. And that was louder in Bucky’s brain. Heavier. A weight on his chest that he had fucked this up, that Sam obviously did care about Her, that She’d probably—somehow—earned it more than Bucky had, and people liked Her when nobody liked Bucky, so of course Sam was disappointed. Bucky had been tasked with watching some sort of fucked up, insufferable, living goddess and he’d let his goddamn emotions and paranoia and how something about her just seemed impossible—too something, too beautiful, or loud, or angry, or smart, or likable—get in the way.

“You’re gonna need to apologize to her.” Sam snapped, moving to stand behind his desk. “Get her some flowers. Pick them, don’t buy them. She’ll know the difference.“

Bucky gaped at him. “Why the hell would I get her flowers, Sam, I-“

“Because it’s part of the apology, dumbass. You fucked up, you say I’m sorry, and we all move on.”

“Did you not hear me?“ Bucky braced his arms on the desk, narrowing his eyes. “She fired me. You’re gonna have to find someone else-“

“You promised.” Sam shrugged, and Bucky scoffed.

“I don’t think she cares about my promises.”

“And I don’t care if she fired you, Buck. I’m rehiring you, and you’ve got work in,” Sam glanced at his watch with a small frown. “An hour ‘till your girl is gonna be up. Get the flowers. Tell her you’re a paranoid old asshole, and you’re sorry, but she’s not dyin’ to Hydra so she’s stuck with you.”

“Sam.” Bucky hissed through his teeth. “She fired me. There are- You’re Captain America, you have other options that aren’t me-“

“Maybe I do,” Sam raised his chin, giving Bucky a firm, pointed glare. “And maybe I don’t give a shit about those other options, because I’m trustin’ you with this.”

“I told you-“

“Yeah, I know. You’re not a fit, you don’t wanna do this, she fired you, I don’t care.” Sam let out a long breath, dropping down in his chair and glancing over Bucky’s shoulder. “Lock the door.”

Bucky frowned. “I locked it when I came in-“

“Good.” Sam muttered, glancing around the room like he was checking for ghosts or bodies pushing out of the walls, listening to their conversation. “Look, Buck- It’s gotta be you. I don’t trust anyone else, and you’re a paranoid dickbag-“

“That’s fucking rude-“

“It’s true, Sargent Snooping in a Girl’s Desk.” Sam snapped, and Bucky’s frown deepened. She wasn’t a girl. She wasn’t even a woman. She was something a step above, that was made of the longer shadows of his bedroom and the worst fire that pushed up his throat. 

“I was being careful.” Bucky grunted, holding his ground. “We’ve been burned before, Sam, you know that.”

“Yeah, I do. But she isn’t a threat. I told you that, and-“ Sam cut himself off with a shake of his head. “That’s not the point of what I’m sayin’ Buck. This is- This might be big, man. Hydra- I got something.”

Bucky felt his whole body go rigid. 

He’d known Hydra never really died. They’d crumbled with SHEILD, when he’d been freed, but they’d been international. Huge. Even Bucky hadn’t been entirely sure just how deep they ran, but he’d known that they were out there. Weakened, but out there. 

Sam had said that like they were growing. 

Like this was more than just a threat.

“Sam,” Bucky muttered, keeping his words low and careful. “Say what the hell are you’re talking about.”

“When you were with them, you ever hear about somethin’ called Project Ouroboros?”

The Soldat scratched at the base of his skull. It would’ve been one of those memories, if Bucky did remember. The ones that were washed over and fogged with electricity, the Soldat programming buzzing and in control as Bucky just folded, fading into a ghost in his own mind. Not himself, and not seeing and hearing anything Hydra didn’t want him too, the whole world lined with a white-hot frost that kept most thoughts in a shattered stasis.

The fact the Soldat was stirring at all meant that Sam’s words meant something. But they all were in that fractured haze.

So Bucky shook his head. “No, not that I remember. But you know memory isn’t my strong suit, Sam-“

Sam rolled his eyes. “Shut up, man. Just thought I’d ask, cause it’s seemin’ like something Hydra woulda had Mr. Murder on.”

“You gonna tell me what it is, or am I just supposed to wait until it’s a problem-“

“It’s a problem now,” Sam sighed, and Bucky felt his fists clench. “The working theory is that, when Hydra was workin’ in SHIELD, they had some, uh, extra projects.” Sam said slowly, watching Bucky with a weary expression. He wasn’t afraid of Bucky—if Sam got credit for anything, it was that he’d never been afraid of Bucky—but he was cautious of his reaction. His words were too carefully chosen to not be.

Another really bad sign.

“Of course they had projects.” Bucky muttered, the knit of his brow starting to form a small headache. “They were 90% crazy mad scientists, Sam. Just say was Ouroboros is-“

“We’re not sure.” Sam said, rubbing at his jaw and effectively ignoring Bucky’s glare. “All the shit is redacted, and I’ve only found it buried under a million other projects, but it’s seemin’ like, maybe, they were makin’ something called the Leviathan. You-“

“Don’t ask me if I heard about it.”

“I wasn’t gonna-“

“Yeah, you goddamn were.”

Sam paused, and raised his brows. “Well, have you?”

Bucky rolled his eyes. “Shut the fuck up.“

Sam chuckled raising his arms in surrender. “Sometimes it’s too easy, man. Like candy from a baby-“

“Don’t give candy to babies.” Bucky snapped. “They don’t have teeth.”

Sam snorted. “You’re always just a bundle of fun, Buck-“

“The Leviathan.” Bucky grunted, because if he kept entraining this, they’d be here until noon. “You brought it up, Sam. Say what the hell it is.”

There was a long pause, and Sam let out a heavy breath as he glanced back to the door, dropped his voice, and gave Bucky an almost apologetic look.

“No smashin’ anything.”

“Sam-“

“All signs are, currently, pointing to Hydra making a doomsday device, and puttin’ it on standby ‘till they need it.”

Bucky felt like there was a plate of iron, crushing down on his chest. “A fucking doomsday device.”

Sam grimaced, his nod tight. “Yeah.”

Bucky ran a hand over his face. The iron was going to weigh down on his spine, bury him too deep in his own body. “If Hydra’s had a doomsday weapon, where the hell have they been hiding it?”

“Don’t know yet.” Sam muttered. “That’s part of the workin’ theory. All of this is- Right now, it’s hypothetical. Hydra may have finished the Leviathan, but there are almost no records that project Ouroboros was ever completed. It could just be scraps in a warehouse-“

“Or it could be a doomsday device.” Bucky hissed. “In fucking Hydra’s hands-“

“Not in their hands yet.” Sam shrugged. “That’s what we need to work out. Over two dozen previously dead Hydra projects have been uncovered in the past six years, Buck. If there is a Hydra doomsday weapon, they might not have had the manpower to use it during the blip, but they sure as shit have it now, and we need to find it before they do.”

“Then why are you still making me stick with babysitting.” Bucky raised his brows, drawing to his full height as he held Sam’s gaze. “If Hydra’s gaining ground, you need me in the field, Sam-“

“I’ve got guys in the field.” Sam didn’t balk, his words set. Firm. Unmovable. “I need you watching the civilian who’s gotten tangled up in this cause-“

“Cause?” Bucky jaw clenched, and an impossible amount of further strain entered his body. “You think she’s tangled in this, Sam? You think-“

“I don’t think you’re right, Bucky.” Sam said, voice flat. “You know you ain’t right. There are some- It’s complicated. Even she don’t know why they want her, but they want her, and that’s all we got to go on right now. Hydra’s wakin’ up, she’s the only thing we know they want, and I am not losing her just because you two can’t play nice.“

Bucky rolled his eyes, lowing his voice to under his breath. “She started it-“

“I know she did, that’s why I said you two.” Sam let out another long sigh. He’d been doing that a lot lately. “Bucky, I’ve told you, man. You’re the only one I trust here. If it helps you can think of it as protecting a package, I just need to not lose someone I care about to a bunch of fuckin’ nazi assholes. Okay?”

Bucky grunted, and it wouldn’t help to think of it as a package. He’d been trying to think of it as even less—just a mission or case to crack—but it kept just moving back to being Her. She was too loud, too attention demanding, too entirely consuming of Bucky’s brain for him to just pretend She was nothing. 

That might the most annoying thing about Her. How She might only be crude and taunting to Bucky, and he still may not believe that Her whole human goddess thing wasn’t an act, but he had yet to see a part of Her that didn’t draw the entire world in like She was made of something heavier than gravity. And Bucky was—tragically—still a part of that world. He wasn’t machine enough to be exempt from how She’d laugh, and it would be an almost musical, siren-like sound.

And She laughed a lot. That was another annoying thing about Her.

Pretending She was a package wasn’t an option, and if not because of the laugh, because he could still hear the venom in Her voice when she’d spat doll right back in his face like the word was a bullet. Package and doll seemed to fall into a similar category Bucky didn’t have a name for yet.

He didn’t want to think of Her as normal and human—it would make him picture Her curled up and pallid on that bathroom floor, force him to think about the bags under Her eyes that were somehow heavier than his—but package felt cruel.

It was almost 4am. She’d be up soon, and he needed to make a game plan to tell Her they were stuck together—Bucky had a feeling if he kept arguing, Sam would pull the part of your pardon card and mean it—in a way that didn’t get him hit with a stapler. 

“Bucky, I’m gonna need to hear an okay-“

“Okay.” He grunted. This was important to Sam, and would help fuck with Hydra. He just had to keep repeating that this was important to Sam and would fuck with Hydra, and he’d be able to handle it. “Sam?”

Sam raised his brows, and Bucky chose his words very carefully, starting with Her name. He needed to practice that one. It still sounded like a code.

“How long you known her?”

“Long.” Sam shrugged. “Met the kid when she was-“ He cut himself off with a frown. “In a weird place is the best way to put it, I think.”

Bucky kept his face neutral, adding weird place to his log. “Weird place?”

“Yeah. Complicated place. For a while.” Sam sighed. “Good she got in with Stark when she did. Even if it was Stark, better than...” 

Sam trailed off, shook his head again, and Bucky frowned. 

“Better than what?”

“Not my shit to say. I ain’t a snitch, Bucky-“

“I’m not asking to you to snitch-“

“Yeah, you are, and I’m more afraid of her than I am of you. She’ll kill me, you’ll just bitch and whine.” Sam gave him a pointed look. “You gotta stop fishing for information and do your damn job.”

Bucky rolled his eyes. “Stupid job.” He muttered under his breath, moving to the door. “Glad I crushed that damn water bottle-“

“You crushed what-“

“Get over it, Sam. You can have me guarding that fucking wolf of a girl, or I can keep that water bottle in one piece. You don’t get both.”

Bucky opened the door, and when he looked back Sam was watching him with a frown. 

“So you’re gonna watch her?”

“Said I would, didn’t I?” Bucky muttered, glancing at that goddamn clock on the wall.

The sun was almost up.

She’d be up with it. Probably—if Bucky had been reading the slump of Her shoulders and unreasonable amount of coffee and energy drink She consumed right—before it.

“See you later, Sam.”

“Try not to kill each other!” Sam called as Bucky closed the door. “Get the flowers!”

——————

The Boy is purring on your lap. It’s low and smooth and grounding.

You need it right now. You need the reminder that for at least the Boy, he can be alive and have it not hurt. That you’re not burning and destroying everything you touch, because the Boy is happy and content here. With you. 

It’s going to break your heart to move him, but you can see the frosted shapes of sunlight starting to break through the windows and dance over the floor. You’re going to need to be up soon, make a pot of coffee, and go to work. Because that’s what you do. You sit on the floor in a self-imposed exile from your bed, and then you light up for the Show and pretend the world isn’t eating you alive. 

But you can feel it. You can feel the pain of the long, long night—longer shadows and heavier air that no amount of coffee is going to be able to cure—and you can watch the light on the floor and know that it’s not shining on you.

If you moved your foot an inch to the side, it would. 

But that feels blasphemous. 

So you’ll stay here a little longer until you need to animate yourself, and pretend you feel nothing painful or impossible or irrational at all. 

Sam hasn’t called you to check in on the lockdown, so you’re going to go to the office. Maybe he’s assuming you’ll just go into lockdown, but Sam’s not that stupid—and he knows you too well to think you’d just roll over like a bitch—so he’s either put a new detail on you, of he’s had a moment of clarity and realized that you’re really not worth the resources to protect.

Maybe Barnes didn’t tell him at all, but you don’t really care. That sounds like a Barnes problem, not a you problem. 

You hope he didn’t tell Sam. 

You hope Sam finds out of his own, and Barnes gets his ass thrown off a building. You hope Sam waits until the last second to rescue him. 

Fucking Barnes.

You hadn’t intended on going to the office, but you’d forgotten some papers, and Happy never had to know. And there he’d been. Snooping and calling you Hydra, acting like you’d crawled out of the depths of hell instead of just faked your way into whatever type of cruel heaven this was.

You aren’t Hydra. You’re not keeping any Stark Industry secrets, because you’re just the sweet charity girl. The pretty face that offsets all the previous war crimes, that Pepper throws money at so you can turn it into something good.

And you do, and nobody looks at you any further because you’re not Hydra. You’re not important. 

Hydra will learn that, if they come for you. Barnes should’ve already known it from the start, but it seems you’d played your part too well, and he started to see shadows in you that weren’t there.

Because you do have secrets. Big, loud and haunting secrets that end you on the bathroom floor, watching the light leak into the room and swallowing down the bile on your tongue from another night that’s too lonely and dark. 

But they’re not the secrets Barnes thinks.

You’d lain in bed with the lamp on, before you ended up curled on the tile with your head tipped back against the wall. You repeated, over and over and over, that you didn’t need to call him. You’d be fine without him. You’ve been fine without him, and you can feel the bond start to fray once more, but it’s only a few more weeks. And they’ll hurt, and the time will be long and feel infinite, but you’ll just keep fucking going until you crash, or he comes home.

You’d been alone, and that was fine. You couldn’t open your eyes without little black spots dancing over your vision, but that was okay. Not normal, but okay, and there was an invisible, burning poker being driven into your skull but that didn’t matter, and you couldn’t breathe but no one can breathe when there’s molten iron being poured into their lungs.

You’d called him. You’d been alone, and there’s really never anything to prove—you could try and prove it to yourself, but doing things for yourself has never been effective—so you’d called him.

It had taken a few tries. He’d picked up of the seventh ring of the fourth call, and when you’d barely whispered that he needed to be home, and snapped that you should just stop whining. 

“I’m busy,” he’d drawled your name, and you’d swallowed. He was busy, he didn’t need you bothering him, and this wasn’t his pain. It was yours, and you should be able to handle and push through it yourself-

Something had felt like it was tearing and bubbling up your spine. You can’t keep going. You’re weak and inconvenient, but you need him. It makes you pathetic, but this is the one thing you can’t do alone. 

“I just- Please.” You’d whispered, hating your own voice. “I’ll do anything, please-“

“God, you’re-” He’d cut himself off a groan, and He’s refused before. Made you wait a little longer for some sort of lesson you never seem to learn. You might be doing that lockdown anyway, because you can’t fucking move-

“Plea-“

“Shut up. There’s a douchebag here, keeps telling people I’m a dick, and ‘impossible to work with’, and you know I’m not, honey, so I need you to make him stop.”

You’d swallowed, pressing your brow to the cool porcelain of the toilet. Your voice was a little softer when you spoke again. You could—kind of—think. “I can’t do that when I’m in New York. You know that-“

“Then you’re fucking useless!” He’d shouted your name, and you flinched, but barely. It was hard to move at all. “Just- Jesus, fine. Do the future thing.”

You hated the future thing. It was harder than he seemed to think it was. More complicated and clouded over your vision, because there was so much of it, but he only ever wanted to hear one future. The one you’d made the mistake of telling him about the first time, because you’d been a naïve little idiot who thought she could be safe.

And in a way, you were safe. You’d found that future—dull in the corner of the web—and told him about it, so the pain was alleviated. Washed back into nothing, your whole body settling as the bond forged itself back together. 

Now you had no excuse not to move. Not to stay here—on the cold floor with the Boy in your lap—for the rest of your useless life.

You need to make that coffee. Get on the subway and watch the graffiti blur past as you sit, and revel in sitting because fucking Barnes had always made you stand. 

Only two protestors today. One yelling about aliens, one claiming Iron Man never really died, and he’s being held captive by the government. Other than that, it’s an easy ride. You can listen to you music until you’re deaf and cross your legs under your body, spacing out because Barnes isn’t here the be annoying to, and whole day can be like this, if you’re lucky. 

You’re not. 

You step out of the elevator, into your office, and-

“Fucking-“ You let out a long breath, and the Show has to flip on. You need to be bored and amused and annoying, and nothing more or less. Barnes can’t see you, no more than he did when you shattered and cracked and showed him a little too deep. 

You’ve spent the weekend trying not to think about it. How you’d screamed at him like a child, and said too much. How he’d seen you—a little too much of the full, raw, bitter and angry and delicate you—and now there might not be going back. He’ll be able to see all the flaws in you, because he’ll know exactly where to look. What parts of the Show shine too bright to draw attention, and what parts shine too bright make people blinded. To force them to look away because there’s something real beneath it, and they’re not supposed to see it.

It hadn’t been something to worry about, when you’d thought you’d never see him again. 

It’s going to be a problem now. 

“I thought I fired you.” You raise your brows, your voice as dry and indifferent as you can manage, and Barnes shrugs.

“Looks like you don’t have the authority to fire me.”

You narrow your eyes. “I can ban you from my building.”

Barnes snorts. “Give it a shot. See how it goes. I’ll be right here ‘till you work that one out, and-“

“What about fired,” you drawl, angling your chin to hold his gaze. “Don’t you understand, James?If you’re not gone in thirty seconds, I’m calling security and making sure they send the old war drones-“

Grace clears her throat from her desk, and her apologetic expression looks a little too close to pity. “I- Um- Mr. Wilson called. He said to tell you that, if you try to kick Sargent Barnes out, he’ll tell Mr. Hogan you came in over the weekend again, then lock you in a room with Barnes until you both- ah-“ Grace swallows. “Grow the fucking hell up.”

You scowl, shooting Barnes a glare. “Did you tell Sam what you did?”

“Yep.” Barnes holds your gaze, a look on his face that you can’t read, but still want to punch off. “I’m not exactly allowed to leave you to fend for yourself, d- Kid. Deal with it.”

You feel your face twist into a sneer, your voice dropping to a hiss. “Deal with it?”

“That’s what I said.” He crosses his arms, jerking his head back to your office door. “You gonna go do your job? Or are we standing here all day like fucking idiots? Cause I can do either, sweetheart-“

You don’t let him finish before you’re storming past him, making the gamble that—if you’re fast enough and he’s still too absorbed in his taunting—you can slam the door in his face.

It doesn’t work. Barnes catches the door with his metal arm, and now there’s a fucking indent on the wood. 

You’re going to start crying. He can’t be allowed to see you cry. 

“Get out-“

“I’ll fix that,” he mutters, closing the door behind him with what seems like a slight amount of care. Likely a trick, or a measure to make sure nobody pays him any attention. “We need to talk.”

“We just talked.” You snap, dropping behind your desk without sparing him a glance. “I tried to fire you. It didn’t work. But if you’re going to be here, you’re not allowed in my office anymore-“

“That’s-“ Barnes lets out a long breath, running a hand over his face. “Fair. But it’s not happening.”

“You-“

“Listen. That,” he nods to your desk, something brimming on the edge of his expression that almost seems like an emotion. “Won’t happen again. You’re not Hydra.”

You snort, wrinkling your nose at him. “Oh, really, I wasn’t aware-“

“And I,” he lets out another breath, as if the words are an act of physical labor. “Should not have done that. I was being careful, but it was over the line.”

He pauses, like there’s supposed to be more but he can’t work out what it is, then closes his mouth. He’s looking at you like you’re suppressed to say something. 

You’re not even sure what the fuck is happening.

“Was that…” You trail off, scanning over Barnes’ braced stance with a frown. “Was that supposed to be an apology?”

“It was an apology.” He grunts, and you snort.

“Are you- Jesus Christ, dude, you are shit at this-“

He rolls his eyes. “What the hell am I supposed to do?”

“The traditional thing is say sorry, you old fuck-“

“Sorry.” He snaps, tone hot and mocking as he holds your glare. “Is that better?”

“Am I allowed to say it’s worse-“

“You can say whatever the hell you want, kid.” Barnes leans against the wall with another shrug. Sam couldn’t be that annoyed if you through your mug at his stupid face. He’s handsome enough that a scar really wouldn’t do that much harm- “What are we doing today?”

You scowl at your mug, turning it between your hands. You can’t throw it at his face. “Nothing.”

“Look, we’re stuck together, so if you want to be a fucking brat the whole time-“

“I’m being literal, dumbass.” You snap, watching the screen of your computer slowly blink on. “No meetings or field trips. It’s grant day, I’m doing a lot of reading.” You shoot him a too-sweet smile. “I’d ask you to help me, but I’m not sure you know how to read.”

Barnes’ eyes narrow. “You know I can read-“

“I don’t know anything.” You hum, looking back to the computer. “I was born twenty minutes ago. This is my first day on earth, ever.”

“Then how the fuck can you read-“

“Shut up.”

Barnes, shockingly, listens. He sits silently in the corner for the majority of the day, so unmoving that there are long moments where you forget he’s there. Sometimes he’s clear his throat, and you’ll glance up to find him staring right over your head.

He’s a strange man. It would be more amusing if you still didn’t want to cause him physically harm.

Because he won. The asshole didn’t even really try, and he won. You’d played better, and you’d been so far ahead, and you may have slipped a little when everything was dark and it was just you and Barnes in the whole world—his every word still hitting so deep in your body, grabbing and flaying a hot nerve nobody else has ever managed to find—but you still should’ve won. 

But you didn’t.

And now you’re stuck with him. Your alleged safety is more important than Barnes breaking into your office and calling you Hydra. You’re the same as you’ve always been, trapped. Contained. Too much to be trusted to watch and control yourself, and nobody—yourself included—sure how to handle you beside a leash and muzzle. 

Even when you stand and try to go to the bathroom, Barnes follows you. Like Hydra will be waiting to grab you from inside the toilet. 

“What are you doing.”

“My job.” He grunts. “Pretend I’m not here. Cry on the floor, vomit, I don’t give a shit, long as-“

You raise your hand, and he cuts himself off. You stare at each other for a second, and if this becomes a pattern—you tell Barnes to do something, and he listens with wide eyes and a confused expression—you’re going to need to figure it out and take advantage of it.

“I’m taking a shit.” You keep your voice flat, and get two blinks in return. “Wait outside, buddy.”

He stops the door with a hand, frowning down at you. “If you’re worried about having a panic attack in front of me, I’ve seen far, far fucking worse-“

You roll your eyes, and duck right under his arm. “If you need proof of my shit, I’ll hand you all my toilet paper when I’m done.”

Barnes grunts behind you. “That’s fucking disgusting-“

“I know. Wait.”

He listens, again. And when you get out of the bathroom, he’s looking at you. Right into you with an almost searing gaze, as if he’s trying to pry something like the truth from your body. To make you turn and fall to your knees and whine that he was right, that you’d spent all your time in the bathroom without him sobbing and taking ragged breaths.

And you need to gain something like a hold over that. He can’t just be allowed to keep seeing you. He has to taste something bitter in the back of his throat, to have his skin feel too tight just as yours always does. And you’re tired, and Barnes needs to stop looking at you, stop seeing you, and to fucking hurt like you do, if he insists on clawing his way into your head.

“They’re not panic attacks.” You mutter as you return to your desk, and Barnes frowns at you.

“I never said they were-“

“You were thinking it.”

He scoffs. “Didn’t know you were a mind-reader, sweetheart.”

“I’m not.” Something pulls and wraps around your spine. You’re good at ignoring it. “But you were.”

Barnes doesn’t say anything for a long minute, and when you look back up from your computer, he’s fucking staring at you again.

“What?” You snap, and he doesn’t flinch.

“Nothing.” He shrugs, face still painfully unreadable. “Not panic attacks, huh?”

You pull your lower lip between your teeth—biting back a sneer that Sam would say doesn’t help the situation—and look back to the computer. “No.”

“You just cryin’ in the bathroom for fun?”

Your fingers freeze on the keyboard, and you shoot him a glare. “What was my first rule, Sargent?”

“I’m not asking as your friend.” He gives you a pointed look. “I’m asking as your bodyguard.”

“How is that bodyguard information-“

“Just is.” He shrugs, giving you another expectant look, and you take a deep breath. 

Barnes is stuck here. He won. Sam would tell you not to push things for no reason. That being angry is valid, but it’s good practice to know when you’ve lost, and adapt.

You can adapt just fine.

You can be a compliant little animal from Barnes, and still piss all over his shoes.

“I have a…” Another long breath. This is so fucking stupid. “Chronic condition. It’s… idiopathic. Incurable. And if I don’t treat it, I get sick.”

You can see Barnes frown from the corner of your eye. “Idiopathic-“

“It means nobody knows what caused it-“

“I know what it means.” He snaps, something slightly edged in his voice. “What is it.”

“Chronic.”

“Yeah, I got that, what’s the condition-“

“Incurable.”

Barnes snaps your name, and you bite your cheek to stop a smirk. “You having fun?”

“I am.” You give him another sweet smile, and you think his glare might be branding over your ribs. “Thank you so much for asking.”

Two blinks. Nostril flare. “You’re not going to tell me the condition.”

“Nope.” You shrug. “You need to tell me a secret too, by the way.”

He frowns. “I- You didn’t tell me a secret-“

“Only five people know my condition even exists.” You give him a pointed look. “You just made it six. That’s the definition of a secret. Your turn.”

“I didn’t agree to those terms-“

“Well, I didn’t agree to this.” You gesture between yourself and Barnes on the couch, keeping your features bored. “We’re all making sacrifices, James. Tell me a secret.”

He doesn’t have to. You think he knows that, with how he’s watching you. Like you’ve fallen from space, and have started to spew pure fucking nonsense in his face. You’re out all your advantages. He’s already won, and you can’t make him say anything, so there’s literally no reason for Barnes to even acknowledge you-=

“I don’t like roller coasters.”

You stare at him, your mouth falling slightly open as he holds your gaze, and you try to put together what the fuck he’s talking about.

“What?”

“Roller coasters.” He repeats, as if it will suddenly make more sense. “I hate ‘em. Always have. They’re loud, and rickety, usually pretty shit engineering, least in my day-“

“Everything was shit engineering in the forties, Barnes-“

“Yeah, Stark’s flyin’ car was kinda horrible-“

“And,” you push on, watching him carefully. “That isn’t a secret.”

“I’m getting to the secret,” he grumbles your name, leaning further back on the couch. As if he’s settling in. “You need to work on your damn patience.”

You start to sneer something at him—you’re not sure when you open your mouth, but you’re sure you’ll find it on the way—but Barnes cuts you off before you get the chance. 

“I hate rollercoasters, but Sam thinks I like them.”

You wrinkle your nose. “Why-“

“Patience.” He drawls, and you could swear that was a smug, amused glint that flashed over his eyes. “Stevie needed to do somethin’ that fed his adrenaline and didn’t get him beat up, so I made him do all the roller coasters. He thought I liked ‘em, and he told Sam I liked them, and I’ve been living a lie for the past hundred years about likin’ rollercoasters.”

“Just…” You don’t know what’s happening, or why Barnes looks so comfortable, but your words are slow and careful as you hold his gaze. “Tell Sam you don’t like rollercoasters.”

“Nah. Not worth it.”

“It’s-“

“It’s not that important, sweetheart. I can deal with one or two, when Sam makes me. That an acceptable secret?”

He raises his brows, that’s definitely a look of amusement, and you don’t feel like you won this conversation. This seems, somehow, like Barnes got the upper hand again. 

He looks to human and talking, sprawled on your couch in more than grunts. No part of him is mechanical in a way that makes you tense. Even metal of his hand, glinting in the light, looks more alive than half the people you’ve seen on the subway.

He’s looking at you again. It sparks something in your bones that’s not good or bad, but foreign. And all you can do is shrug and turn back to your computer, mumbling out an agreement and trying to pretend he hasn’t successfully thrown you. 

People never throw you. You always adapt, and rationalize, and keep moving in a steady dance nobody else can ever keep up with.

But Barnes has been matching your steps. Every single thing he says and does pushes itself deep into your body, flying into the cavity of your chest and hitting a wired, soft thing that you can’t name, because it’s never been hit before.

But all week, Barnes keeps fucking hitting it. Matching  your dance in perfect pace, and the Show isn’t breaking, but it’s like he’s not even seeing it.

At every meeting, he sits with carefully slumped shoulders in the corner, looking between you and whatever suit you’re talking to, his expression back to the unreadable, stoic mask. 

“Is he- ah-“ One of the men—on the younger side, leaning at little too far across your desk as you discuss financing—glances over his shoulder at Barnes, tone and expression weary. “I don’t think we need him in here for this-“

You shrug, ripping at the corner of the paper under your hands. “If you can move him, he’s your to take home.”

The suit looks back to you with a frown. “I just want him out while we’re talking, sweetheart, I don’t want to take him home-“

“Good thing, then.” Barnes grunts, and the suit starts in his seat. “Cause there’s no way in hell you’re moving me.”

It takes an active effort to cover your gape before the suit looks back to you. He’s never spoken to the suits before. You’ve been certain he just spends the whole time trying to disappear into the wall or something. You don’t think you’ve heard him say more than a sentence to anyone but you, and that was because you pretty much made him.

“If he had moved you,” you ask after the suit leaves, testing exactly how far you can push it. “Would you have gone home with him?

“No.”

You give him a taunting smile. “And here I was, ready to charge people fifty dollars for the chance to win James Barnes and take him home-“

“Uh huh.” Barnes cuts you off with a flat expression, and he’s looking at you again. “You wouldn’t charge them. You’d let someone take me for free, kid, don’t lie.”

You wouldn’t have charged them. You wouldn’t have done that at all, not even as a joke. Partially because you don’t think anyone could move him, but mostly because if they did, taking him is a little too close to home for pressed down and suffocated memories in the corners of your brain. 

“Shut up.” You mutter, looking back to your computer. “Do you think if I put you out on the curb, someone will just pick you up? Or should I list you on eBay first? I’ll pay for shipping if you take my first-edition, reformed Winter Solider. Comes with a brand-new metal arm and he’ll watch you take a shit.”

There’s a long second of silence, and when you glance up, Barnes is frowning at you again, his brow drawn together and that same, odd emotion brimming over his expression.

“eBay is…” He pauses, never breaking your gaze. “Online marketplace.”

“Good job.” You hum, trying to make your smiling almost sickening. Full-lipped and mocking and saccharine, maybe enough to erode a little of his seemingly concrete will to not even blink at you anymore. “You want a sticker?”

His frown deepens. “What would I possibly use a sticker for.”

“Fun, James. Sorry- That’s this thing people do to experience joy-“

Barnes rolls his eyes. “I experience joy.”

“Sure. Is that setting just...” you raise your brows at him. “Off, right now?”

His jaw twitches, you fall back into your slowly well-tread pattern of silence, and you don’t like that it’s comfortable now. You keep really, truly forgetting that he’s there. You shouldn’t be forgetting that he’s there, not when he’s supposed to be a disruption. Something to avoid, not grow used to. 

But Barnes is stuck here. You’re stuck here. You keep trying to text Sam—to get him to look you in the eyes and tell you that he doesn’t care what Barnes does, you need his protection and that’s that—but the asshole won’t pick up, and you’re stuck with Barnes.

You can’t get used to him. One of the largest rules you have for yourself—Barnes or no Barnes—is the rule that you can never get used to something. The only things you know will be the same—all the time, no matter how everything changes around—are that you will be alone, and you will be you.

And you’ve been you with Barnes too much this past week. Sitting with him in your office. Having him follow you around like a shadow. Trading sharp words with him that are always a little too close to the truth, always trying to stay that pace ahead and faltering when he catches up to you with seemingly no effort, fucking looking at you and matching your every step with infuriating ease.

“Do you even eat?” You ask him on the Subway—a more empty morning than most—spinning off the pole as you give him a wide, teasing grin. “Or is it like, jet fuel? Gasoline? If I give you batteries, and you going to tell me you like triple A better than double?”

Barnes doesn’t even flinch, only glaring right over your head at the blurring Subway walls. He’s been doing that a lot lately. “I don’t use batteries. I run on natural fuel.”

You pause, watching him with wide eyes, and there’s a small tick of his lips. Up. Like a smile. 

“Was that a joke?” 

“Not my best bit.” He says, still not looking down to meet your gaze. “But yes.” His brow draws slightly, and then—as if he can’t help it—he adds, “I eat at home.”

You hum, continuing to swing off the pole. “You have a home?”

“Where do you think I go at night?”

“I think you stand outside my apartment like a weirdo. You always wear the same five things.”

He finally looks down at you, the small furrow in his brow deepening.

“I can’t do my laundry.” He grunts. “My washer needs coins, and I don’t fuckin’ have any.”

“Go to the bank, genius-“

“The bank doesn’t like me. Apparently being an international terrorist lowers your credit score.”

You tilt your head at him. “Weren’t you pardoned?”

“Doesn’t seem to matter.” He grumbles, still staring at you, and you shrug.

“Should matter. Being pardoned for any crime is supposed to revert your credit score back to what it was before your conviction.”

Barnes blinks at you. “Really?”

“No.” You spin around again “I made that up.”

“Why the fuck would you-“

“But you can get coins from like, arcades.” You ignore his glare and sharp words, fixing your eyes back on a dent in the subway car as you continue to spin. If you get dizzy and slam into Barnes, you’ll kill him and then yourself. “Or, if you give me fifty bucks, I’ll get you a hundred quarters.”

You can see Barnes in your periphery as you spin, and he’s looking at you like you’re a specimen again. “Your math is… disgustingly wrong.”

“That makes sense. I’m bad at it.”

He just grunts, still staring at you, so you push on.

“And I think you’re lying about having an apartment, by the way. I think you spend all night staring at my windows.”

Barnes snorts, and you keep spinning. “How the hell would I even know which ones are yours-“

“Some super-spy you are.” You throw him a wide smile as you turn, and he rolls his eyes. “I’m at the top.”

You point up—just in case he doesn’t know what top is, and because it’s funny to watch his eyes flick up on instinct as you spin past—and continue.

“I like to imagine you glaring up at me all night, thinking about different ways you’d like to kill me.”

He shrugs. There’s the weird fucking smile again. 

It’s the most off-putting thing you’ve seen yet. 

“I can do that from home, sweetheart.”

Your grin widens. You keep trying to look at him while you spin, and it’s a little dizzying. “So you do think about me-“

“You said you think about me first.” He drawls, his brow furrowing once again as he watches you. “Was that a joke?”

“What, that I think you want to kill me-“

“That you didn’t know I go home. You should’ve known I wasn’t out there, kid.”

You give him a flat look when you spin again. “I know I seem like I know everything, James, but usually I’m just making stuff up and I end up being right-“

“I got that.” He grunts, and you don’t love how he says it so quickly. “But you said you already have good security at your apartment. If you have good security, you should know who’s outside your building at all times.”

“I don’t own the building. Happy can see it, that’s all I need-“

“Happy has a job.” Barnes snaps. “And his security wasn’t strong enough to work out who the hell put that letter in your mailbox. If you don’t have real cameras and security, do-“ He cuts himself off, and before you can slow enough to get proper look at him, he’s grunting your name and moving on. “We need to talk about me adding some. Now.”

You hum, smiling at him again as you come around. “No.”

Barnes snaps your name again. “I’m being serious-“

“So am I. My apartment doesn’t need an upgrade.”

You don’t need Barnes snooping around your apartment. Your office was enough, and you have no interest in him looking around your living room and somehow putting together that you sit on your couch once every month, and spend time on your bathroom floor at home as well.

He doesn’t seem to be giving up that easy.

“It’s for your safety-“

“And I’m fine-“

“You won’t be if Hydra breaks into your apartment,” he hisses, and you don’t stop spinning. Your head feels a little light, and your heart moves to your throat at the thought. 

You can’t let him see that.

“I think I could reason with them.” You say, keeping your voice dry. “I think we could bond over our shared love of octopi. Did you know that their mouths are also their asses-“

Barnes grunts your name. You think he might be practicing it, because it sounds better every time. “That’s not funny. They’d kill you.”

You open your mouth to say something that probably would’ve been smart, but your fingers slip on the pole, and you slam into something warm and firm.

Barnes.

Barnes caught you.

He’s staring at you as he puts you on your feet, and you can’t stop grabbing his arm because the world is still moving in waves and circles, and this is so fucking annoying-

“Think about it.” He grunts, and you shoot him a glare.

“I said n-“

You squeak as Barnes loosens his grip ever so slightly, and lets you fucking fall a foot down before hauling you back up, a stupid, smug look on his face.

“What was that?” He raises his brows, your nails dig into his arm, and you’re certain it’s the one with skin, but he doesn’t even flinch.

“I hate you.”

“Uh huh. You gonna answer me?” His smirk returns, and your glare deepens.

“I’m going to push you onto the train tracks-“

“I’m sure you are, Sweetheart. Answer.”

He’s not wavering. You’re still a little dazed from slipping and falling, and you haven’t really touched anyone that didn’t feel like they were a danger in… a frightening amount of time. 

That’s what you blame, when you mutter, “I’ll think about it.”

Barnes grins again. 

You feel like you’re losing your mind.

And when he picks you up the next day, he has a backpack. You’ve never seen him have anything but his jacket and gloves.

It’s weird. You spend most of the crowded subway ride—Barnes rigid with a clenched jaw at your side—staring at it, trying to figure out what the hell is inside. When you walk through security you even fall a pace back to stand at his side, hoping to see when they open it, but your dumb, frightened guards mutter Sargent Barnes and let him past without question, only wincing when the metal detector blares at his arm. 

“When did you get friendly with my security guards?” You ask in the elevator, and Barnes shrugs.

“They know Sam. Respect him, enough to trust me.” He glares at the elevator doors. “And they’re smart enough to be afraid of me.”

You wrinkle your nose at him. “Alright, you old fucking Emo, I’ve seen scarier pigeons than you, so let’s calm down.”

“Emo, like the bird?“

“No, it’s like-“ You sigh. “It’s a subculture, you can google it. I’m saying it to mean you’re being dramatic.”

He shoots you an odd look. “I am not being dramatic-“

“Yeah, you are. What’s in the bag?”

Barnes doesn’t answer, only moving forward to hold the elevator doors as they ding open, and staring at you until you roll your eyes and step ahead of him.

You don’t get to know what’s in the bag until lunch. It sits at his side on the couch, and whenever you glance up to see if he’s opened it and you somehow hadn’t noticed, he’s staring at you.

And when it’s finally unzipped, he pulls out a thermos. A little, hot pink thermos and single plastic spoon that he holds between his teeth as he twists the thermos open.

“Stop staring.” He mutters your name, muffled through the spoon, and shoots you a glare. “I’ve heard it’s rude.”

You just raise your brows, looking between him and the thermos with a pointed expression. “What’s happening here?”

“Lunch.” He grunts, scooping what seems to be brown mush onto the spoon. “That a problem?”

“No, I just-“ There are too many questions. Too many possible things to say, too many angles to attack this from, and Barnes isn’t helping. He’s looking at you with a slight smirk, as if he’d somehow known this would fuck with you more than it should. 

Because it really shouldn’t be fucking with you. It’s just a thermos. A hot pink thermos. Barnes’ hot pink thermos, that he’s keeping brown mush in. Brown mush he’s eat with a plastic spoon, because it’s his lunch, a day after you made fun of him for not eating-

“You all good, kid?”

“Uh, yeah.” You meet his gaze once more, your words careful and slow. “Is there… anything else in the backpack?”

“No.”

“And what is lunch, exactly?”

“Oatmeal.”

You gape at him. “With like, sugar and honey? Marshmallows? ”

Barnes makes a tight face of what’s likely disgust. “Why the hell would I put that shit in oatmeal.”

“I-“ You let out a long breath, and force your gaze back to your computer. Too many things. Not enough time. 

You have a job. Your priority cannot be Barnes, and his borderline depressing eating habits. 

The weekend comes and goes—you hole up in your apartment, make no progress on your own Hydra research, and the pain begins to ebb and wax once more the longer you’re alone, every night somehow longer and the sun never leaking into the bathroom soon enough—and Barnes is still using his dumb little thermos as the next week begins to pass.

It’s almost like a ritual. He opens the backpack at the same time every day—you don’t even think he has a clock—and frowns with a plastic spoon between his teeth, twisting off the thermos top in half a second before eating his oatmeal. 

It’s driving you insane. It’s feels like another game that he’s winning, another part of the Show that he’s somehow cracking past without effort, and you don’t even know why. It’s oatmeal. Sad, pathetic oatmeal that he eats like it’s a chore. He’s built like a truck and he’s eating oatmeal. He’s been alive a hundred years, and somehow the only thing he can think to eat is oatmeal. 

Even on days that you go out for meetings—walking around a Stark funded museum, pretending you’re listening to the finance reports when really you just like looking at the art—Barnes still eats his oatmeal, at the exact same time as, apparently, always.

“I can do the apartment security this weekend,” he grunts in your ear a little while after, walking one pace behind you through the gallery, and you shrug.

“I never agreed to that. And maybe I’m busy-“

“You’re not.”

This time, you shoot him a glare over your shoulder. “You don’t know that-“

“I do. Sam told me you’re not exactly social, and unless you’ve been lying to me about staying home for the past three weeks-“

“Shut up.” You mutter, and you could swear you hear Barnes make a sound that’s dangerously close to a chuckle. “Sam’s a fucking snitch-“

“Was he wrong?”

“I said shut up.” You run a hand through your hair, keeping your gaze focused on the floor as you walk. “You never apologized, you know.”

You can hear the frown in Barnes’ voice. You’re back on steady footing. “For-“

“Breaking into my office. Maybe I don’t want you in my apartment because you broke into my fucking office, and then never apologized.”

“I said it wouldn’t happen again.”

“That’s not an apology-“

“Do you want an apology that I wouldn’t mean?” 

That makes your steps pause slightly, and you glance back to see Barnes looking right over your head. “What?”

“I’m not sorry. I could’ve…” He pauses, frowning at the air. “Handled it better, but I was taking precautions.”

“Precautions-“

“You’re too smart to want a fake apology, sweetheart.”

Barnes finally looks down, a challenge buried in his gaze, and you scowl. Your heart is moving in your chest, and there’s something warm over your skin made of smart. 

You are smart. You fucking know that, and you don’t need Barnes to tell you, but people never- 

He doesn’t get to do that. Just because those words are close to a compliment, and you don’t ever really get those and believe them, but you believe Barnes—he doesn’t seem like a liar, just an asshole—doesn’t mean he gets to move you at all on how he’s not apologizing for fucking breaking into your office.

“Well,” you whip around, making sure Barnes can’t see how he managed to ram himself too deep past your defenses again. “You’re not forgiven.”

Barnes snorts behind you. “Didn’t think I would be-“

“Shut up.”

“Sam said to get you flowers.” He continues as if he never even heard you. “Seemed like overkill, but if it’ll get you to stop being so damn stubborn, trying to get yourself fucking kidnapped-“

“I don’t want flowers from you, James.” You shoot him another glare over your shoulder, and this time, he’s still looking at you. “But I’d forgive you with gummy sharks.”

Barnes blinks. “What the fuck are gummy sharks.”

You don’t answer—that’s another step forward in your favor, even if you aren’t even sure what your favor is any more—continuing on through the gallery, and the next day, Barnes is still eating his fucking oatmeal, and you’re going to lose your mind.

You snap at the end of the week. It’s the same bag. He always puts it in the same place. And there’s a reason scratching at the back of your head for why Barnes is eating like that, and it’s getting too raw and heavy, impossible to ignore. 

You want to throttle him. He’s eating his sad oatmeal, and now you have to message Grace to—when she goes out to get lunch—buy some sugar and honey. Brown sugar, and good honey. Maybe a honeycomb, because you’re paying.

If you can’t do the Show with Barnes—can’t annoy him into quitting—you can at least stop making him take up so much of your attention. You’re busy. You have things to do, you need to focus on what matters, and his habit of making the you you rear her head is a fucking problem.

You’re small and rabid, that’s not supposed to be visible like this—in full, clean daylight—and keep aching whenever the dumb thermos pops open. You know it’s because you can piece together why. Because you could be whipped and flayed and shredded to bit and you’d never be the most important thing in the room, so Barnes needs to stop doing this—stop making himself another thing you can pull a part of yourself out to help—so you can go back to ignores the pangs of your spine starting to burn once more. 

When Grace gets back from the deli, she passes the sugar and honey to you along with your lunch, a small frown on her face. You only grimace in return, and march over to Barnes the moment the door is closed.

“Put these,” you toss the sugar and honey into his face, and jerk your head to the oatmeal. “In there.”

He stares at you. “What-“

“Stop eating like you’re a solider and use some fucking sugar, dumbass.”

One blink. Nostril flare. “I don’t know what you’re-“

“Shut up.” You cross your arms, raising your chin slightly as you hold his gaze. “Do it.”

“What the hell is it to you what I put in my oatmeal-“

“If you do it.” You cut him off, because he doesn’t get to see more. Hit you further and deeper after he made you do something dumb like this. “I’ll fully forgive you for breaking into my office.”

He scans over you, his brow fully drawn, and you feel like a specimen again. 

That's fine. 

Anything to let you all just move on, and the annoyance of caring about Barnes end. 

It’s not caring about him. It’s about him, being a person eating sad oatmeal. 

But it’s still Barnes.

And that’s so fucking annoying.

“I don’t need you to forgive me,” he mutters, and you shrug.

“Well then, I don’t trust you in my apartment.”

He scowls. “How can I even know you’ve really forgiven me.” “I will. I don’t say things I don’t mean.” You snap, and Barnes gives you a flat look.

“You’ve lied twelve times today, for fun-“

“That doesn’t count, I owned up to it immediately. You want me to have security?”

Barnes’ jaw ticks, but he nods.

“Then use the fucking sugar, James. Deal?”

He doesn’t respond, and you let out a long breath. You tried. You failed, and that’s going linger under your skin, but you really fucking tried.

You go to move, but he catches your arm.

“You’ll forgive me.”

“That’s what I said, yeah-“

“Fine. Shake.” He holds out his hand. “If it’s a deal, we shake.”

“Are you fucking serious-“

“Deadly. Shake.”

You lose the staring contest. You shake Barnes’ hand, and you only realize after you return to your desk that it was the metal one. 

That feels important, but you can’t work out why.

Why doesn’t feel like it matters, though. You watch Barnes put his sugar and honey in the oatmeal, eat it, and then fail to disguise the fact that it tastes so much better the second the spoon is in his mouth.

You won. And the next morning, there are four things in the backpack. The thermos and spoon—molded into one thing in your mind—come out as always, before being joined by sugar, honey, and-

Barnes stands without warning, marches over your desk, and slams a small box of gummy sharks in front of you.

“We’re square.” He grunts, and you sigh.

“Are you asking me if we’re square, or telling me?”

He scowls, and lets out a long breath before grunting, “Askin’.”

He’s started to slur more words, his accent slipping out in small, odd ways. You don’t know what it means, but it’s been making your brain hum in a strange way, because it sounds nice. Objectively, he has a nice voice. And you did say you’d forgive him if he got you gummy sharks. 

You’ve backed yourself into a corner. 

And when you nod and pull the gummy sharks across your desk, Barnes stands a little taller. As if he’s proud.

It’s kind of adorable. And the lighting I n your office makes his jawline look sharper.

“You got to good kind,” you mumble, and he shurgs.

“Didn’t know there was a bad kind of gummy-“

You wrinkle your nose at him. “Obviously there’s a bad kind of gummy. We really need to start broadening your food horizons, James.“

He hums, and the small smirk pulls back at his lips. It looks too real.

It’s kind of dangerous.

“We?” he drawls your name, and you flush.

You haven’t flushed in years.

All you can think of is to flip him off, and stuff your mouth full of gummy sharks so you don’t have to respond. But when Barnes goes back to his couch, and eats his oatmeal, the only thing you can think of is how he said your name.

He said it like it was a name. Like it was you.

“You can call me Bucky.”

You blink at him, your words muffled by the sharks. “What?"

“If we’re square, you can call me Bucky.” He raises his brows, almost in a challenge you don’t understand. “Okay?”

You can’t tell if he’s asking again. You don’t know what he’s testing you on, but it seems important, and when you nod and swallow so fast it hurts your throat, he sits a little taller.

“Okay, Bucky.” It’s odd to say. Too easy. Snapping on the right syllabuses, and round in the right place, and knowable.

It’s too knowable.

And somehow, you fucking lost again. This is becoming a problem.

Bucky hums when your say his name, and you have forgiven him because why wouldn’t you. He said it wouldn’t happen again, and you believe him. He’s seeing you, but he’s not folding away, and he’s even been listening to you now.

And you’re not above a grudge, but you’re also not above anything at all.

Bucky doesn’t seem to be either. Nobody is. You forgive him because nobody is above anything, and Bucky might not have apologized, but he won’t pretend to either.

There’s no Show with him. It’s an odd, clear type of relief. Bucky just knows that whatever you are, he can see it, and then match it.

And that, as he settles back into the couch and grins at you again, is the most dangerous thing of all.

End Note: Old Man Bucky with his oatmeal I love him.

Thank you so much for reading!! If you like this story, please reblog, share, or leave a comment! <3

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[wintersoldiersoul]

Talking Body

Summary: Bucky hates going to therapy so you help him feel better when he gets home. Warnings: A little bit of fluff, Smut, squirting, fingering, oral (m recieiving) penetrative sex

You were sitting on the couch reading a book when you heard the door creak open. “Hey baby,” you called out to your boyfriend. He walked over to you and kissed you on the forehead gently.

“Hi.” He smiled but the expression didn’t reach his eyes. He had just gotten home from his court-mandated therapy, an hour out of his day that was always extremely taxing. Bucky sat down next to you and rested his hand on your knee. He still seemed lost in his own head, the way he often did when he got back. “What’cha reading?” He was trying to distract himself.

“Harry Potter. Figured the fall was a good time to re-read.”

“Oh. Haven’t read it,” Bucky sighed. He always came home from therapy sad. It made him think about not only the horrible things he had done, but all of the time that he lost. Your heart ached for him. You couldn’t imagine how he felt, waking up in a completely different world than the one he had known in his youth. 

You put the book on the coffee table and laid your head down in his lap. As if on auto-pilot, his hand started to stroke your hair gently. He always liked to be close to you when he felt like this. “You okay, bub?” You knew the answer was no, but you also knew Bucky wouldn’t open up on his own. Hell, he barely opened up to his own therapist.

“I will be, now that I’m here with you.”

You sat in silence for a few minutes as he continued to play with your hair. You knew there was so much going on in his head and as badly as you wanted to pry with questions and make sure he could talk it out, you knew he didn’t want that. He would tell you when he was ready. He always did. 

“You’re so gorgeous, my love,” Bucky spoke softly, breaking the silence. “My beautiful angel. How the hell did I get so lucky?”

You smiled at him and changed your position so that you were straddling him. You had no intention of anything sexual, just wanting to be closer to him. But as you adjusted yourself on his lap, you felt his hardening length underneath you, unleashing desire within your veins. 

Bucky looked up at you with his mesmerizing blue eyes full of pure, unfiltered love. He loved you more than he ever thought possible. He smiled at you as you kept your eyes locked in one anothers. 

“Hi,” you said, making him laugh.

“Hi, honey.” 

You ran your fingers through his hair and began to move your hips. He gazed up at you, soft lips parted and eyes glassy. “Y/N…”

“What is it, baby?” You smirked.

His eyes still didn’t break away from yours. “Y/N, I love you so fucking much. Let me show you how much I love you, please baby.”

You bent your head down to connect your lips, tongues tangling together as you continued to grind on him. His hands traveled down to grab your ass, squeezing gently before spanking you. His flesh hand traveled between your legs and you silently thanked yourself for the flimsy pajama shorts that you had put on when getting home from work. He pushed the material aside and lightly ran his fingers over your slit. “No underwear, baby? God, you’re so good to me.”

“W-wait, Bucky,” he immediately stopped his movements, not wanting to do anything that you weren’t okay with. “Wanna make sure you want this, okay? I-I know therapy is really hard on you and I just want you to-” you couldn’t continue the sentence because the breath was plunged out of you when Bucky inserted two of his thick fingers inside your pussy.

“Oh angel, I want this. I promise, I do.” He kissed your forehead gently as his hand began to curl inside of you, putting pressure on your g-spot with every motion.

“Oh, god,” you whispered. Your head fell into the crook of his neck and you started to grind down on his hand. The position had his palm scraping over your clit too, sending you into a frenzy.

“That’s it, sweet girl. Ride my hand.” He added a third finger, stretching you open even more. “Feel good, honey?” He teased when you let out a loud moan. You nodded, trying to answer him though your brain was drunk with pleasure. “I love you so much Y/N. So fucking much.” His soft and loving tone completely contradicted the sinful things he was doing in between your legs.

“W-wanna touch you, Buck,” you whined, seeing the outline of his thick erection through his jeans. Your mouth watered at the thought of having him in your mouth.

“Shh baby girl. Cum on my fingers first. Want to make my best girl feel good.” He picked up the speed of his fingers and brought his mouth to your neck. Your moans grew higher and higher in pitch until you screamed, cumming all over Bucky’s hand. “Bet that felt good, princess. So fucking beautiful when you cum,” he said, removing his hand from you and sucking on his fingers. “Tastes so good.”

You pawed at his belt, trying to get it off as fast as possible. He lifted his hips as you pulled down his jeans and underwear, nearly drooling when you saw his cock spring free. You sank to your knees in front of the couch, taking the bulbous head of his dick into your mouth. Bucky’s head fell back as he let out a breathy moan. “Fuck, sweetheart.” 

You slowly took him deeper and deeper, bobbing your head up and down on his cock. Bucky’s eyes fluttered closed as his breaths grew quicker and quicker. You loved making him like this. You loved that you were the only one who could make him like this. This powerful man, an assassin feared by people for decades. And here he was, completely at your mercy. You hollowed out your cheeks, suctioning him into your mouth harder and harder. Bucky started moving his hips up and down, fucking your mouth harshly.

“Oh fuck! Stop-stop, don’t wanna cum yet.” You removed him from your mouth and he pulled you back up onto the couch. Frantically, you both removed your shirts leaving yourselves fully exposed to each other. “Love these tits, baby. So fucking pretty,” he cood, flicking your nipples with his hands. “You ready for me, princess?” He asked. 

“Yes, so ready.” You moved your hand down and lined him up before sinking down onto his cock. “Fuck!” You cried, once he was fully inside of you. Even after so long, the feeling of his cock stretching you out always amazed you. He fit so perfectly inside of you, stretching your walls amazingly. It was like he was made for you. You moved yourself back and forth, feeling the tip of his dick hitting your g-spot everytime. “I love you so much, Bucky,” you moaned.

His eyes were locked on where you were joined together. He moved his metal hand and started rubbing your clit harshly, moaning at the squelching sounds that your wetness was making. “B-bucky!” you screamed out. “S-shit, I’m gonna come! Oh fuck!”

“Yeah baby, that’s it. Come on, honey,” he encouraged. 

A powerful feeling overtook your entire body as you came, soaking the couch and Bucky’s stomach. “Holy shit, baby, you just squirted. Fuck that was so sexy, I can’t wait anymore.” He started thrusting up into you harshly, not even letting your orgasm fully go away before he was bringing you towards another one. “Wanna try something, baby, okay? If it’s too much just tell me.” You trusted him with every fiber of your being. His cold metal hand moved from your clit to your opening and he pressed a finger into you beside his cock. 

“Fuck!” You screamed at the overwhelming sensation of being stretched once again. Words abandoned you and all you could do was moan and scream.

He continued to fuck you hard, the finger beside him inside of you causing you to feel every ridge of his cock even more. “Fucking you so good you can’t speak, huh? Going dumb on me, bunny?” 

Just when you thought your body couldn't possibly feel any better than it already did, he craned his neck up to start sucking on your tit. His tongue flicked over the bud relentlessly. “BUCKY!” You moaned, louder than he could ever remember hearing you before. You squirted again all over him, spraying his body with your cum. 

He fucked up into you faster and faster. “Shit, Princess,” he moaned as he let himself go, hot cum spraying into your body. Before he was finished, he pulled his cock out of you and pushed you down onto your back, painting your stomach with his cum. “So much cum for you. Wan’ you to see how much cum I have for you, honey.” When he was finished, his tongue trailed down your stomach and onto your pussy. He dipped it into your hole, tasting the two of you mixed together. He left gentle kisses as came back up to your lips, slipping his tongue into your mouth so that you could get a taste. He laid down next to you, pulling you into his arms. 

“I truly do love you so much. More than anything in this entire world. You’re my light, Y/N.”

“I love you too, Bucky. I know it’s hard baby. But I’m so proud of you, okay? You’re gonna be okay. You’re so strong. So resilient. And I admire you every single day for that.”

He kissed your head softly. He still didn’t wanna talk a lot, but just laying there with you was enough. 

After round 2 in the shower, the two of you spent the night cuddled together in bed watching movies. As long as you were by his side, Bucky didn’t doubt that he’d one day be okay.

[malum-forev]

has miscommunication for the bingo been taken? if not, can i request that one with bucky?

Hiii thank you so much for your ask! ❤️‍🔥 Here's what I came up with!

*

Miscommunication 

BrothersBestFriend!Bucky x Reader

Cold. That was the perfect word to describe Bucky. Distant came in second place, followed by calloused, mysterious, brooding and lastly, your brother’s best friend. Although you were only two years younger than your brother, Bucky always saw you as the pestering little sister. Even now when you were out of college and living in the same city as your brother and his group of friends. 

You had fixed your hair and worn a tight dress your brother would certainly not approve of but if it were up to him, you would wear a full body sack of potatoes to the club. You walked down the hallway of the apartment you shared with your brother but stopped before you got to the living room, you heard voices. You placed your back flush against the wall.

“Can you quit being an asshole? Try, for one day.” You heard Sam whisper.

“Why does she have to follow us everywhere we go?” Bucky groaned. “If I wanted that, I would have bought a dog.”

Steve shushed the brunet. “She’s one of our best friend’s sister, you can’t say that!”

“I’m just saying what we’re all thinking.” Bucky’s words hurt, a feeling of embarrassment burned your being. You felt the edges of your eyes prickle.

“We think she’s nice.” Sam said. “She’s funny and tells us childhood secrets about our friend, like that time she told us he got caught sneaking out of a girls window and broke his arm during the fall! What more can you ask for?”

“Well I think she’s immature.” Bucky drove the knife deeper.

You brought your hand up to your mouth to muffle your gasp, the tears falling from your face. Your brothers door opened so you quickly wiped your face and gulped down your feelings. 

“Not to sound like mom but, we know you’re a girl, you don’t have to show everyone at the club.” He laughed, pointing at the short hem of the dress. “You ready to go?”

You offered your brother a smile. “I think I’m going to sit this one out, I just got my period.”

He made a disgusted face before peeking into the living room. “Hey guys, it’s just us this time.”

“Fuck.” Bucky whispered as he closed his eyes and leaned his head back, knowing you’d heard every wretched word you’d said. 

--

The next weeks were filled with apologies to your brother, flaking on plans and making up late nights working. 

“Have you thought about talking to HR?” Your brother’s voice said through the speaker on your phone. “I don’t think it’s normal for your boss to make you work late again. It’s the third time this week!”

You hiked your tote bag up your shoulder. Trying to balance your takeout on one hand and your phone pressed to your ear was proving to be a difficult task. You sighed of relief as you turned the corner to your street. 

“Yeah, I should but I don’t want to get on my boss’ bad side.” You expertly lied. Of course you felt guilty lying to your brother but what else could you do? They were his friends after all and Bucky made it clear you weren’t welcome. Plus, you’d been tagging along for far too long. 

“Call me if you get off early, yeah?” He said. “We’re going to go bar hopping and you deserve a drink!”

You kept your eyes on the steps of your apartment complex as you climbed them. “Yep, I’ll let you know when I leave the office.”

“You tell them they can shove their extra hours up their ass-“ You heard Sam yell over your brother.

You chuckled as you searched through your bag for your keys, two more steps and you’ll be home- your feet bumped into another, a combat boot wearing pair of feet you recognized instantly. 

“Oh shit.” You muttered, your eyes traveling from the black boots to the tight black jeans up towards a red Henley. Ocean blue eyes looked straight into your soul. Busted. 

“Are you okay? What happened?” Your brother asked.

“Everything’s fine, I’m fine just- it’s an Excel emergency. Got to go, call you later.” You hung up quickly.

“Late night at work?” Bucky raised his eyes at you. “Excel emergency?”

“Don’t even.” You sighed as you pushed past the beefy man, unlocking your apartment. 

“May I come in?” Bucky asked, hands resting on the doorframe.

You rolled your eyes, setting all of your things down. “You’ve been here a million times, you don’t need to ask to come in.”

“I’ve been here with your brother.” He emphasized the word. “Never as your guest.”

“I wouldn’t call someone who was waiting at my door a guest.” You mumbled, eyeing the man who still hadn’t entered your apartment. “What are you? A vampire? You need to be invited in?”

“Only one way to find out.” His smile was wicked as he dragged his boot across the bottom of the door. 

You considered letting him burst into flames, maybe he was a vampire. That would be one reasonable explanation as to why he’s a dick. 

“You can come in.” You said, taking your food and setting it in front of the TV. “Only if you promise to be quiet while I watch Vanderpump Rules.”

“I never thought of you as the lying type.” Bucky closed the door behind him and watched as you started eating dinner. “You were supposed to be a good girl.”

“You’re already breaking the first and only rule I gave you.” You shushed him. 

“You have no idea how badly I want to break the rules.” Bucky muttered to himself. 

You paused your show. “You’re not going to be quiet so, why are you here?”

“Why did you lie to your brother?”

You stood up from the couch. “I asked you first.”

“I’m here because-“ Bucky ran a hand through his hair, following you into the kitchen like a lost puppy. “Because you stopped going out with us.”

A true laugh ripped through your chest. Is he serious?

His expression urged you to answer, like he didn’t know the reason for your absence.

“Do you ever make up your mind?” You snorted. “First you say I’m immature and you don’t want me near you and now, now you ask me why I’m not there.”

Bucky felt heat rise up from the back of his neck to his cheeks. There was some part of him that hoped you hadn’t heard- maybe your boss did suddenly become a raging SOB. 

“I didn’t mean it like that-“ Bucky started. 

“Please, do enlighten me as to what you meant when you said, and I quote: ‘Why does she have to follow us’ and then ‘I think she’s immature’.” You let out a dry chuckle.

Bucky’s Adams apple bobbed, trying to figure out what words he should say. But his blank expression gave you everything you needed to know.

You walked to the front door of your apartment, opening it. “Look, I don’t know who forced you to come here and apologize but it’s okay. No hard feelings, Buck. Just don’t tell my brother I didn’t have to work late and we’ll call it even.”

Bucky leant his head back and groaned. “You don’t understand.”

“And I’m done trying to understand.” You added. 

“I understand that you say no hard feelings but that’s the problem-“ Bucky walked towards you. “I want to have no feelings.”

“Bucky it’s fine. I get it, you don’t like me and don’t want to be my friend. I’m over it.” You rolled your eyes again. 

Bucky’s chest heaved, his emotions taking over his brain. He took your body and slammed it against the door, shutting it closed. Bucky’s large hands cupped your face, his once clear eyes now turned dark. 

“You don’t understand.” He whispered dragging his knuckles lightly against your cheek. “I don’t want you there because I can’t control myself whenever you’re near.”

Your throat became dry. “What? I thought you didn’t like me.”

Bucky chuckled lightly, now his finger ghosted over your lips. “Quite the opposite. I like you, I want you, I needyou. But I cannot have you.”

Hi hiiii This is part of my 1k Celebration, if you like this please be sure to look at the Bingo Card and ask for a prompt! Love y'all <33

And you can find the Bingo master list and what prompts are still available here!

*Any gifs posted are not my own and I give the artist full credit.

[dyinglikenarcissus]

Staying Home

Steve’s best girl has been sick before but not like this. He’s determined to be the best stay at home doctor boyfriend he can be.

Thank you so much @longingstormysoul for the inspiration. It’s not exactly what you requested but I had the flu and I kind of weaved this story into that.

Warnings: None really. Just fluff and stuff but this blog it still 18+. No funny business

Plagiarism isn’t cute. Don’t do it.

Like, comments, and reblogs are all appreciated 😊

Master List

You wake up feeling a slight chill run through your body. You snuggle closer to you personal heater and pull the sheets up to your nose. You swallow and know that the flu season has finally gotten to you. You try to take a breath and find your nose hopelessly stuffed. You attempt it again and are thrown into a coughing fit.

“You okay, princess?” You hear Steve’s sleepy voice mutter from behind you, rubbing a hand down your side.

You sit up and take a sip of your water bottle you kept by the bed. You attempt to sooth your burning throat but it doesn’t help as it brings on another coughing fit.

“Hey. What’s wrong?” Steve asks again sitting up to rub your back.

“I think I’m coming down with something,” you wheeze, trying not to talk too loudly.

“Oh, princess. Come here,” Steve coos and presses the back of his hand to your forehead. “You’re warmer than normal,” he muses.

“But I feel so cold,” you whisper, pulling the blankets to your chest.

“Yup. Definitely a fever. Do you have any cold medicine?” You nod and attempt to get out of bed. “I’ll get it,” Steve assures you and presses you back down.

“It’s in that cabinet,” you sniffle and cough before continuing, “in the corner by the sink.

The upper one.”

“Got it. You sit tight and bundle up,” orders.

You’ve never been one to follow orders.

You slide out of bed to use the restroom and brush your teeth.

Steve steps into the bathroom and appears in the mirrors reflection after you spit out your toothpaste.

“Didn’t I tell you to stay in bed?” There’s a playful smirk on his face as he watches you through the mirror.

“I’m not the soldier in this relationship,” you whisper. You think the vibrations from your toothbrush loosened the congestion in your nose but your throat was still on fire.

“When you finish up, I made you some hot tea then I’ll take your breakfast order.”

“You’re gonna cook?” You chuckle and rub some face wash against your skin. Your boyfriend is good at almost everything. Cooking is not one of those things.

He grins at your words. “Panera’s a block away. Whatever soup you want. Sandwich. They have flat breads now. Apple for breakfast, chips for lunch, baguette for dinner.” You can’t help but giggle at his notion but you’ve gone days only eating at Panera before. Sadly.

A day of Panera sounded amazing.

“And I made you a virtual doctors appointment. They’ll call in an hour. Just wanna make sure I don’t have to go on a murderous rampage to find a cure for the love of my life.” You giggle and it turns into another coughing fit.

“You’d go on a murderous rampage for me?” You smile once you regain your voice.

“Well…Bucky and Loki would. I’d go along to keep them in line.”

You smile at his words. “Thor can’t even keep Loki in line. What makes your think you can?”

“Hey! Who kicked Hitler’s ass across the continental US?” You shake your head and try not to laugh to hold back the coughs. “You done making yourself look beautiful? Get back in bed, princess.”

“Beautiful?” You huff, looking yourself over. You felt anything but beautiful but you’d take it.

You slink back into the bed with Steve on your heels. He tucks you in before sitting on the edge of the bed to take you meal order. It may be breakfast time but some chicken noodle soup sounded amazing. Stevie did say to order for the day…

You giggle at the array of items in your cart by the time you pass Steve’s phone back to him.

“Soup, salad, a whole baguette, a kitchen sink cookie? What is that?”

“It’s got everything but the kitchen sink,” you smile. They normally sell out at lunch so you’re staking your claim early. “What are you getting?”

“Breakfast sandwich, turkey sandwich, ham sandwich,” Steve recounts. “And I’m getting one of these cookies, too.” You smile and Steve presses a kiss to your forehead. “Take some meds, princess. And get some sleep. I’ll be back before you know it.” You nod and obey his direction as he walks out of the bedroom and the apartment. You sip you tea and scroll through your phone for a minute before the NyQuil kicks in and knocks you out.

You wake up to Steve hot body wrapped around you as he dozes, spooning you comfortably on the couch. At least it would’ve been comfortable. You would’ve normally loved it.

You felt completely stifled.

“Stevie, too hot,” you whine and attempt to press away from him.

He groans and stretches before muttering a soft “What’s wrong?”

“You’re too hot,” you whimper trying to struggle out of the throw blanket.

“Calm down. I’ll help you.” He untangles you and tosses the blanket to the chairs. “Better?”

You hum positively.

He sighs and you hear music playing from the TV. “We fell asleep?” You ask as you crack your eyes open to see the credits playing from the movie you were watching.

“You’ve seen Avatar enough times to know all the lines. We didn’t miss much.” You hear the smile in Steve’s voice as he rubs your stomach softly.

You giggle and sing along to I See You with your croaky sick voice. Steve laughs and rolls on to his back. Well, as much as he can on the crowded couch.

“How you feeling, princess?”

You yawn and nod. “A little better. I’m enjoying just being home with you. Sucks I have to be sick.”

“I’m enjoying the vacation,” Steve yawns. “What are we watching next?” He goes back to the Disney+ menu to scroll through your recommendations.

“The Orville! Or Miraculous Ladybug! Are there new Miraculous episodes?”

Steve chuckles. “Let’s check. Shit, looks like they uploaded the rest of season 5.”

“Run it, Cap!” You grin.

“Popcorn?”

You nod and get up to go to the kitchen.

“Take some cough medicine while you’re up,” Steve instructs.

You sigh and but follow his orders. You were getting better under Dr. Rogers supervision so you couldn’t knock him. You just had a bad cough and a migraine that wouldn’t go away no matter what medication you took. But all your other symptoms cleared up in a couple of days.

He had to be doing something right.

You toss a bag of popcorn in the microwave and look through the pile of pills for your cough meds.

You grab two bottles of water and deposit them on the coffee table when there’s a knock at the door.

“Who’s that?” Steve mutters narrowing his eyes.

“Maybe Amazon?” You shrug. You start to walk over to get it but Steve easily over takes you.

Doesn’t stop you from peaking around him to see who it is.

It’s just Bucky.

“What are you doing here?” Steve greets.

Of course he’d be the only one brave enough to come visit when you’re this sick. Super soldier immune systems are no joke.

“Just came to check on you two,” Bucky grins as Steve lets him in.

“Hey, Buck,” you smile. He pulls you into a hug and presses a kiss to your forehead. It was his standard greeting for you. It always felt so warm and comfortable.

“Sorry for the mess,” you whisper.

“You’re sick, doll. Don’t apologize,” he sighs and follows Steve to the living room.

“How’s it going? Getting any better?”

“From when I first got sick, way better,” you smile.

“She still has a bad cough and gets random fevers,” Steve sighs, pulling you into his lap after you bring back a bowl of popcorn. “But one day at a time.” You nod and snuggle into his embrace.

“You two will never stop being disgusting,” Bucky sighs watching you as he falls into the arm chair. “As much as I love you, I didn’t come by just to check on you, doll face. Stevie. Wanna go to Istanbul?”

“No,” Steve states firmly.

“Nat’s in Brazil and Sam’s in California. I don’t have back up.”

“You can’t throw a stick without hitting a super powered being. Go find one of them.”

“Steve, are you seriously saying no?”

“Yes.” Steve states resolutely. “My best girl is sick. I’m not leaving her like this.”

“Stevie, I’m feeling much better. You don’t have to stay behind because of me-“

“No, princess. Buck. I’m retired. Which means I don’t have to work if I don’t want to. I love you, you know I do, but I don’t want to go. I want to stay right here and take care of my princess. Any other time, I’d suit up but right now, she needs me.”

Bucky looks between you and Steve. “Okay,” Bucky says simply.

“Okay?” Steve asks, leaning back on the couch and pulling you along like a security blanket. Bucky would say whatever he wants to Steve but he watches his language around you.

“Yeah, I get it. I’ll ask Okoye or track down that Moon Knight fellow. He hangs out in the Middle East sometimes.”

“You have so many options,” Steve smiles. “I have to draw a line somewhere.”

“Or we’ll just keep dragging you out and it’ll be like you never stopped,” Bucky sighs, leaning back in the recliner.

“When are you leaving?”

“Couple of days.”

“Then you can watch a couple of episodes with us. Want some popcorn?” Steve pushes the bowl closer to his best friend.

Bucky stayed for a few hours, took a nap, ate dinner, then said goodnight.

You turned on Steve the second the door closed. “You don’t have to stay behind because of me.”

“I’m not doing it because of you. I’m doing it because I love you and I don’t want to leave you alone while you’re sick. I’m going to marry you one day and that’s part of the vows, isn’t it?” He smirks and you’re sure your fever came back because you suddenly feels faint.

The two of you didn’t talk about marriage often but when you did, you alway felt flushed and flustered.

“Come on, my little princess. Let’s get to bed early. You’ve had an eventful day.” He scoops you up by the backs of your thighs and carries you to the bathroom to wash up for bed. You both brush your teeth and shower together, just like you’ve done all week.

And you end it all curled up in Steve’s strong arms. You’re quickly getting used to this.

“I like having you home,” you sigh as he holds you against him.

“I like being home. I could really get used to this.”

“This is what retirement actually looks like, baby,” you smile.

“I think I might actually do it one day.” You hear the smile in Steve’s voice making you giggle.

“I know better. The second I start feeling better, you’ll be back out there on them streets.”

“You aren’t feeling better, are you?” Steve questions and presses you down on your back to get a better look at you. You let out a fake cough. “That’s what thought.” He presses a soft kiss to your lips and you can’t help your smile.

“One more?”

“Spoiled little princess.” But he happily obliges.

“I’m your spoiled little princess,” you remind him.

“I guess I have to keep taking care of you.”

You nod in agreement. “And keep giving me cuddles and kisses?”

“And keep giving you all the cuddles and kisses you could ever need.” He presses another kiss to your lips and pulls you back into his embrace.

You lie in his arms for a moment. “Stevie, I really am feeling much better,” you insist.

He hums softly but ignores you otherwise.

“It’s true. I barely have a cough anymore…”

“I don’t care what you have to say, I’m not leaving.” You giggle softly and snuggle into his arms.

For the first time in your almost two year relationship, he said no to saving the world. For you. You can’t keep the smile off of your face as you fall asleep in the only place you want to be: in Steve’s arms.

Master List