#the cosmonaut variety hour

[bubblesandpages]

If no one's got me (Arcane season 2) then I know Marcus Cosmonaut Variety Hour's got me

[omercifulheaves]

So much makes sense when you realize 1.) Xander is Whedon's admitted self-insert. 2.) You realize that so much of the Whedon wannabe writing out there is basically writing everyone like Xander.

[thegayhimbo]

Yeah.............that tracks. 😒

[girl4music]

Okay… So I watched this entire video even though I hate Xander Slander. Not Xander. Xander Slander. I can’t stand it. But… I decided since this was a YouTuber who has does very good TV show analysis-ses and is a man (because I’m sick of only seeing women hate on him. It makes it seem like it’s just a gender stereotype thing), I thought “hmm… let’s see what he has to say. He might provide a logical reason why Xander is hated so much.”

He did. He is annoying. I’m fully aware of that too and don’t care. But… he also coupled it with “he starts as a little shit and he ends as a little shit”. Which I’m sorry… but that just isn’t true. There is so much growth in this character. I’m not saying the annoying parts aren’t still there, they are. But there’s much more to him than that.

And it’s like this guy completely ignores all of that just to validate his own opinion of why Xander sucks. Nope.

👎

“Whedon self-insert” this. “Whedon self-insert” that.

Just say you hate Whedon instead of hiding behind a fictional character that’s meant to represent him. Even though, every character will represent him in some way.

I know that Xander is annoying and even misogynistic in some of the stuff he says…. in the first few seasons. But after that he matures a lot. He reassesses his behaviour and realizes there’s a problem and then grows from it.

I feel like I’m watching an entirely different show to everybody else when it comes to Xander because I honestly, most sincerely see a very different person from the person I saw in the first few seasons. I just don’t get the hate for him throughout all of the show.

I’m sorry. I don’t. He seems like a great character to me. As a realistic portrayal of someone learning as they go along. I think what it is is because I see the character objectively, rather than subjectively. So I don’t ever think “Oh god, he is so ANNOYING! Why is he here?!”

I look at it as “Okay, so there’s this character. What can I learn about myself and about others through him?”

“Huh. People are annoying but they can still do good.”

I don’t experience Xander’s characterization as if it’s something that affects me other than what to learn from it. Therefore, I don’t complain about him as a character because he is there to serve that purpose.

I complain about the writing for him. Or the directing. Or the acting. Or the producing. The objective stuff.

I think that’s what it is. Why I cannot resonate with the hate for him. I could be wrong. But I just don’t feel hate.

No, I don’t fancy him. No, I don’t fancy his actor.

No, I’m not a Whedon apologist.

But I am a Xander apologist.

I am sorry that people cannot see the value in Xander because they’re too busy complaining about how unbelievably annoying he is as if that’s all he is.

I like the fact he gets in the way when he shouldn’t. I like the fact he tries to do better for himself even if he fails. I like the fact that nothing ever works out for him, he complains about it but then just moves on to the next. I like the fact he just does what any average fragile vulnerable human does. Which is just go on to get on.

Does his annoying traits go away completely? No. And I wouldn’t expect them to since they’re so much apart of him. But at the same time they’re not everything of him.

And when people state their case on Xander - they’ll mention every negative thing they can. But no positive.

And so I cannot take that character analysis seriously because as far as I’m concerned, he does get better.

What gets worse however, is how he is written/acted.

So instead of blasting the character. Take it up with who writes for him and who portrays him in the entire show.

If you can’t stand that he is a self-insert - then hit up Whedon and ask him why he feels he is his self-insert.

Get to the finer points as to why you believe he sucks because the character is doing the best that he can.

[retrokid616]

#x-menRPG

also more matt mercer please

[spiltcandycoatedpunkblood]

watching cosmonaut variety hour when they watch street fighter and tintin can confirm this is how it works

[forgottenbones]

Madame Web - The Worst Superhero Movies Ever Made

[kaontic]

The hype is so real somebody embodied it and claimed it as their identity. (⊙_⊙)

[sun-marie]

the cathartic feeling of having your haterism validated by people you think are smart is literally unparalleled

[stealingpotatoes]

you say C-3PO is technically Luke and Leia's brother?

well i mean i depends on how one counts making a robot in a family structure. bc not everything u make is ur kid (even if i personally call half my discord bots my kids LOL). personally i think your relation to a robot is whatever you make it, so you're only your robot's dad if you act like one and anakin just acted like threepio was a lil annoying guy not his kid <3

that being said he didn't cut off threepio's hand or torture him so ya know. maybe he was MORE fatherly to threepio than the twins...

[willhaart]

Been trying to catch up on Cosmonaut Tabletop's Edge of the Empire podcast.

[sibillascribbles08]

Jasonnie Week Day 6 - Fear/Courage

Oh hey a chance to detail something about VHHB Donnie that I haven't been able to mention before

Jason knew Donnie was afraid of beach balls.

He shared the information back when a thread of conversation led to Jase discussing his phobia of dogs. How he’d just been shy around them as a toddler until one day he got bitten at age six. The dog hadn’t exactly been trying to. It was just big, and Jase was small, and he wouldn’t actually throw the ball that the dog wanted so bad, so it tried to nip his arm. 

Since then he’d go tense whenever he saw one. He’d panic if they barked in his direction or charged at him. And that fear truthfully increased after the invasion, despite how much he tried to overcome it. 

It made him feel pathetic.

And then Donnie shared his phobia, and Jase tried not to laugh about it, but it escaped nonetheless. 

But for a while, Jason figured that must be Donnie’s only major fear. Beach balls and other blown up objects of similar nature. The turtle had fought dozens of powerful enemies, some more terrifying than others, and always come out on top. What else could possibly frighten him?

He found out one night while hanging out in his room. Donnie offered to help him put together a lego set, and they just wrapped up when they both noted how dark it was outside.

“Isn’t it too early for that?” Donnie checked his phone. “Oh, looks like there’s rain incoming.” 

“Really?” Jason checked his own weather app, noting the way too cute graphic of a grey cloud with a lightning bolt. “Ugh, yeah, do you need to head home?”

“And run the risk of getting caught in it?” Donnie huffed and got off the floor. “I would rather not, if you don’t mind.” 

“Of course not.” Jason took a second to place the finished lego model on his desk and then gathered up all the spare pieces to put into the box where he kept them. Donnie shoved the empty plastic bags in the garbage and closed up the container they all came in. 

Jason stepped over to the window, moving the curtains all the way open as he looked up at the clouds. Looked like a nasty one. A surprise it wasn’t already raining. 

“Ah, could we um, close the curtain?” 

Jason only turned his head slightly when he replied. “Why?” 

Just then a bolt of lighting went off. Jason saw the shape of it in the corner of his vision, a jagged line of white against the dark clouds. He turned to get a better look but of course it was gone. A beat later a rumble of thunder wrapped around the building, the vibrations moving through the glass.

Jason smiled a bit and finally turned around. “Looks like this might be a—”

The look on his boyfriend’s face made him freeze. The turtle stood there, eyes wide and fixed on the sky. His hands were up like he didn’t know what to do with them, fingers shaking ever so slightly.

Before Jason could ask what was wrong, another bolt must have appeared. The light flashed through the bedroom and Donnie flinched backwards before stopping himself. 

Oh.

Jason scrambled to shut the curtain, trying to cover as much of the glass as he could. “Shit, Donnie, are you okay?”

“F-fine.” The turtle stuttered out, still staring at something far beyond the room. 

“You’re obviously not.” Jason stepped over to him, but didn’t reach out.

Donnie breathed in through his teeth. “I’m fine.” His voice cracked. Now his arms were shaking. 

Jason didn’t want to touch him, he knew better than that, but he grabbed the comforter folded at the end of his bed and tossed it around his boyfriend’s shoulders.

Donnie grabbed it in an instant and ducked down to the floor, completely covering himself in the sheet. 

“Do… you want me to blast some music?” Jason tried. “To block out the thunder?”

A soft whine. “Th-thunder is fine. It’s not the thunder just…” 

Just the lightning, okay. Jason glanced back at the drapes that could only do so much to keep the flashing light out with how thin they were. 

“Do you want to go to the living room?” He offered. “No windows in there.” 

“Sure…” 

Jason waited for Donnie to be ready, indicated by the turtle standing up, but he didn’t move the blanket far off his head. Jason bumped his hand into the turtle’s, offering it, and when Donnie took it he led his boyfriend down the stairs.

Donnie plopped right onto the sofa and Jason wasted no time turning on some mindless television. Jeopardy. Sure, why not. 

He kept the volume on low and sat next to his boyfriend—still not touching him. Another rumble of thunder came from outside, followed by rain pouring onto the building. 

Jason pressed his lips together, then tried, “Sorry. I didn’t know you were scared of—”

“It’s fine.” Donnie interrupted, curling up more under the sheet. “Not like I ever told you about it.” 

He wanted to ask why, curiosity scratching at his throat like a cough, but he swallowed it back. Instead he just tried to focus on the trivia on TV. 

After about eight questions—of which he only knew the answer to one—Donnie’s head popped out of the blanket as he leaned back against the cushion. His eyes still seemed unfocused, but now he looked more tired than frightened. 

“Do you…” Donnie began, a few cracks still lining his voice. “Do you remember back when I forgot about our lunch plans? And I mentioned the reason we’re hesitant to hire more people to work with Holly and I?”

Jason did, and he nodded. 

“Varii. The name of the yōkai that took over my lab was Varii. He was a long time customer of Holly’s, so she trusted him. Turns out that it was a ruse on his part, biding his time to try and wipe out her and a lot of other mutants.”

Jason’s eyebrows shot up. “Huh? What for?”

“I don’t know his stupid reason. Something about how mutants were like yōkai mimics or something. That we weren’t supposed to exist.”

“And he thinks he gets to decide that?”

“It doesn’t matter.” Donnie snapped for a moment, then relaxed again. “It doesn’t matter. We stopped him and put him away but… He did some damage before we managed that.”

“Took over everything in your lab?” Jason asked. That must have been the event that spurred Donnie to raid Kendra’s warehouse way back then. 

“I… yes, but not just that. He also stole my dart gun, so he could use the darts to strike mutants with something to demutate them.” 

That made him blink. Was that even possible?

“He hit Holly with it.”

Oh. 

Jason wasn’t even sure he wanted to ask this, but he did anyway. “Did it… work?” 

Donnie curled up again, blanket covering his mouth. “Yeah. She was stuck as a regular wasp for about two weeks until Draxum could remake his formula. And even with that we didn’t know if she’d get her memory back or anything.” 

He didn’t really know what to say to that. He still only knew the wasp so well, not often alone in a room with her, but he knew how much Donnie adored her. 

He ran the risk of leaning to the side so their shoulders pressed together. Donnie didn’t move away.

“I’m getting off track anyway.” The turtle mumbled. “In order to manipulate my tech, he used lightning. And one time he even used it on me to corrupt my mystic abilities. Every time I see a bolt I end up feeling that all over again.” 

“I see,” Jason said. “That’s why you didn’t want to risk flying home, huh?”

His boyfriend nodded.

“Well, we can just bunk down here until it’s over.” He glanced at the comforter, an idea striking him. “Actually, wanna arrange this sofa into a fort? Then I could make some popcorn and you can pick a movie.” 

Donnie lowered the blanket just enough that his tiny smile was visible. “Yeah, that sounds fun, actually.” 

Jason smiled and got up to grab some more blankets and props. But just as he turned to walk away, Donnie caught his wrist. Jase let the turtle move his hand so it rested against the side of his face. 

Then Donnie took a deep breath, obviously focusing on the warmth against his cheek before letting go. “Thanks.” 

“Yeah, sure. I’ll be right back, okay? Why don’t you pick a movie?” 

“We should watch that last knight Transformers movie again.”

“Like hell.” 

Donatello grinned. “I feel bad and I wanna pick the shit movie.”

“So you can feel shittier?”

“It’ll be funny.”

Jason rolled his eyes. “Fine.” 

[pax-cruento]

I form an unbiased opinion of any movie by listening to the twitter liberal that is Cosmonaut Variety Hour and the Facebook conservative that is Critical Drinker.

I'm probably better off with Nostalgia Critic

Idk I had this thought, this realization about what I subconsciously do, and needed to write it somewhere.

[golbiey]

oc drawings from the recent times

[lostlegendaerie]

I don't care how good infinity war/endgame are, I'm never watching them bc gamora didn't get to beat thanos to death with a dented baseball bat so what's the point

[ciderrain]

so I started listening to Cosmonaut Tabletop...

they are all my blorbos now.