#the clown escaped the tags.

[s41nt-b3rn4rd]

Tumblr won't let me put a read more on the orginal ask but, HELLO? HI?? I THOUGHT I HAD ANON OFF????? Yes hi I have ocs. My current favorites are like- 5 out of... so many. They'll be under the "read more" because there's alot about them. I'm normal I prommy.

Also potato if you see this, hi. {remember to read the tags for sillies}

In order of who im (SADLY) Hyperfixated on, it goes;

* Sasha {Bulleteer Aaron} , in canon she's an ex-boxer that now works at a tattoo parlor and shares an apartment with a demon she summoned while on a wine binge. She's mixed with Russian+Irish+Icelandic+Mexican heritage but grew up mainly with her Irish and Mexican heritage. She's a disaster panace who can't be picky at this point- Sasha just wants someone who she can come home to at the end of the day, and talk to like a normal person. Does she count as a villain? I hope so. She killed a small family in nebraska once. In a story/rp, she used to be the ambassador for a kingdom but settled down as a butcher. She got burn scars from it for being a #girlboss and they stayed canon. * Sydney {Witherstone Appleton} , in canon their a demon that got summoned BY Sasha. She works at a diner, but mainly lives to annoy Sasha by giving her "water curses" and "sleepy spells" which is just him staring at Sasha until she takes care of herself. Notice how Sydney has multiple pronouns! Because in my lil' oc universe- demons don't have genders. Hell is seperate by everyones own depiction and in mine- it's just.. bland. normal. Sometimes the current ruler throws parties, that's fun. You can get a gender if you want, healthcare and stuff is free. ANYWAYS- Sydney is so normal it HURTS me. It just wants to fucking get groceries, pay bills and leave. BTW they commited tax fraud but shhhh we don't have to talk about that. BTW 2 THEY ALSO KEEP IN CONTACT WITH THEIR FAMILY- HER FAMILY * Matthew {NO MIDDLENAME NOR LASTNAME}. You know that funny meme of what happens if a centaur and a mermaid have a kid?? Yeah he's that. He's basically like, a generic guy- minus his bull ears and the horn's he's growing and his ability to speak underwater and breathe underwater. In canon he used to be like- a leutanint general but now he works at a light-house. He's a weed smoking girlfriend despite being a gnc acearo man with chronic leg pain. also lung pain. In the rp he was made for, he was surprisingly the least problematic. All he did was stress knit- I'm pretty sure he got the job BECAUSE he was just! some guy! He does have horrors though. And by "horrors" I mean he grew up (and out of) the orphanage so he has little to no knowledge about his parents, chooses to stay silent/nonverbal throughout his life so his sentence forming SUCKS- he lives is life in a cycle, can barely cook nor fold laundry. To cope though, he knits and likes to sneak into gardens and revive dead/dieing plants via necromancy. BTW he grew up in the same orphanage as Sasha and they have a blood pact. If one gets hurt, so does the other. * The Asker {that's it's name}. Me and my bestie for life have an ask game with eachother, where our ocs ask eachother questions, and that's my silly little guy for it!! Funnily enough, it was based on anon asks, but eventually evolved into it's own thing. It used to live in an empty black void- with bright computer lights illuminating it's small area of safety, and a single keyboard with oh so many letters and such. But RECENTLY, that fuck ESCAPED!!! JAIL BREAK!!!!! And is currently living in the basement of a motel because "oh my god is this the outside why is it bright why is it loud oh my god oh my god [THEIR] going to [DECOMMISSION ME]." #slay, y'know? Don't worry though, it'll get a job at like- walgreens or walmart and live in a normal ass neighborhood soon. * Sammy {Picture}. Once again, another oc made for an RP that I absolutely FELL IN LOVE WITH!! He's an object-head with one of those rotary phones for a head, but more pathetic looking and kinda like a bug, but it's okay. He's a preschool teacher and admires his job. He has a situationship thing with the person who he shares an apartment with- a soap rabbit humanoid named Bob, that is also a substitute history teacher. Anyways remember the bug thing? Yeah. Sammy used to be a catipillar centaur but someone fucking robbed its grave when he died. BTW Sammy was a catipillar in this sense

and therefor he's very colorful. he's a pathetic meow meow but he's also said the most ominous insults ever. He's my favorite bc I like to imagine him doing the most boring tasks like drinking water. He does his taxes btw. Their my only oc who willingly does its taxes.

[s41nt-b3rn4rd]

your bedtime and spicy chicken and also decease _____

Fuck a personality test. Which label sticker r u?

[fun-esta]

[grimalkinmessor]

SHUT UP ABOUT THE PERCY JACKSON VS HARRY POTTER DEBATE SHUT UP ABOUT THE PERCY JACKSON VS HARRY POTTER DEBATE IT'S BEEN MONTHS WHY IS IT STILL CIRCULATING MY FEED. IF I SEE THAT STUPID ASS TWEET THAT STARTED IT ALL ONE MORE FUCKING TIME I'M GOING TO START DRAWING THEM HOLDING HANDS AND MAKING OUT SLOPPY STYLE AND MAKING SWEET SWEET LOVE ON A BED OF ROSE PETALS I AIN'T PLAYING WITH Y'ALL NO MORE

[anonymous-eggy]

to me, healing is blocking dumbasses who tag fics as gn readers just for the reach and then proceed to refer to the reader as female or put the reader in a dress

[s41nt-b3rn4rd]

@potatos-are-best THIS IS A RED VS BLUE FANFIC. I NEED TO SHARE MY DISSAPOINTMENT.

It's been a good run

But it's time to bring this to a close!

The saga is over, C, T and I are all together. T and I are in the swing of it, C approves as much as it is possible for him to approve of anything, everyone knows about the blog and is chill.

C is back at his rightful place of walking his sister down the aisle.

I'm getting everything I want, and we're all free to make each other miserable until the day we die.

I'm not going to be updating this blog anymore! Nobody else involved with the situation will be submitting any more AITA posts either, because they are either not on tumblr or agreed it would be annoying.

I will say that there is some stuff on here that I've alluded to that isn't necessarily 100% in the spirit of things, so I've included some stuff below the cut for the folks who have caught onto that. I would not suggest reading it if you like how all of this played out and want to keep it that way. I know that's incredibly vague, but I'm not sure how to phrase it without making it weird?

Thank you all for listening and talking to me over the past few days! That's where I'm leaving it!

...

...

...

...Is everyone who wants to keep believing in the disaster polycule gone? Yes? OK!

So, this was fake. I made up the whole thing. TK and C and T and everyone else are fictional characters. Did I lie? Yes. Thanks for coming to my TED Talk.

Q: All of it? Even the og AITA post? The followup AITA post? The screenshots? A: All of it.

Q: Wh... Why did you do this...? A: Well, first this all started as a Red vs Blue fanfic for the ship Chexer (Church/Tex/Tucker)-

Q: It was a fanfic of a Halo fanfic series. A: Yep!

It started as a fanfic for Chexer. However, I was already working on a different fanfic for RVB that was totalling about 15k words at this point (+ at least 90k to go), and I knew I would never have the time or energy to write this one. I thought: yknow. this would be really funny as an aita post.

So, I submitted Tucker's perspective. I did not expect for it to get more than maybe 100 notes at most. I totally thought someone would call it out right away.

The funny part is, if I'd dedicated all this energy to a fic instead of this blog, I'd probably have about 15-20 thousand words of fic already, but whatever, can't ruin my personal day!

Q: But why make the blog then? A: Because I love to lie and be a nuisance to the general populace! <3

Also, I wanted to see how many people would figure it out/how long it would take for it to become too obvious that this was a fandom thing. I was dropping names and RvB lore since the beginning. A few people did figure it out, and I DMed them in private to let them know.

It was always my intent to wait until Carolina's perspective got posted (i am honestly still shocked i got away with "Carey/Georgia/West Virginia/Alabama/Miss Louisiana 1988"), let it simmer for about a day, then come clean. Which is what I'm doing now!

The reason I'm coming clean now instead of dragging it out is because I don't want anyone to feel stupid or like they got duped. You're not stupid! You were a part of this story! This was, as one anon said, a creative writing project. It was a collaboration! Thank you so much for helping me!

That said, I'm sorry to anyone that finds this disappointing! I had a blast doing this, but I will not be doing it again. I have gotten my fill. I have had my taste of being an influencer, and now I can go on with my life without ever feeling like I need to start a youtube channel.

Q: How did you keep up with a consistent timeline? A: I didn't, especially at first. But in my time as a liar who lies about things, I have found that usually people are willing to believe you when you say "yeah, i lied about that".

Q: Wait, what about the thing with your kid? A: Yeah, I fucked up on this one. In the other fic I was/am writing, Tucker was around 33. So, when I was saying what Junior's age was, I subtracted it from 33 and got 18. It wasn't until I was showing my partner the blog and they said "Wait, he had his kid at 13??????" that I realized I had fucked up. Oops!

Q: Was it really ALL fake? A: For the most part. I will say that I did actually drop chocolate cake all over my tits that one time and had to shower by myself like a fucking loser. That one was true. I did also get my nails done for the first time ever, which did actually affect my typing. And I am in a band (but so is Tucker, canonically)! There are a few other things as well, but I don't want to list all of them.

Q: DID you ever read homestuck? A: Nope. And I never will.

Q: So there was never a combination sex/bathtime playlist? A: Maybe! But perhaps more accurately: the combination sex/bathtime playlist was inside of you all along. You can make it. There are only three songs on there that are canon to the lore of this blog. Those are No Children by The Mountain Goats, Take It Out On Me by Thousand Foot Krutch, and one unknown song from the album Good Apollo, I'm Burning Star IV by Coheed and Cambria (Yep, the call was coming from inside the house, I gave Church my music taste). I had intended this to be Wake Up, but it's out of my hands now. The rest is yours to fill in.

Even the title, though I will say that the title I came up with was "Leonard "Alpha Bitch" Church's Decidedly Not Lo-Fi Beats to Get Nasty and Get Clean To: The Movie"

Q: What's your main blog, so I can follow you? A: Hi, this is aitadjcrazytimes. You're not getting that.

Q: Your AO3 handle? A: Nope, not that either.

Q: But- A: Let me live on in your memory. The only person who knows both who I am and the fact that I did this is my partner, who is not into RvB or commonly on tumblr. I am not a RvB blog. I am not a writing blog. I am a nobody on the fringes of tumblr society who's been here long enough to know how to remain in the shadows.

You will never find me. And that's the way I want it. You will see me in every blog. Every new follower. Every stranger you meet on the street. You will look into your discord kitten's eyes, and you will absently wonder if he was the one behind aitadjcrazytimes. And you will never know for certain.

And, even if you do manage to find me, against all odds:

No one will ever believe you.

I am closing my askbox. I am also closing my messages. If you have anything to say to Tucker or Me (tumblr user aitadjcrazytimes), you are welcome to do so in the replies or reblogs, but you will not be receiving an answer. I'll keep this blog up for anyone that wants to go through after the fact and do a deep dive or what have you.

Thanks to everyone who made this into the wild ride it was! Live long and get fucked or whatever! Xoxo <3

[moshieee]

Is mosh-mosh going ti stay around on the blog?

Oh yea definitely

I've been having a lot of fun drawing mosh-mosh in no small part because what they represent for me

It's a bit uhhh, personal and is mostly relevant to my mutuals and other friends I made...

so I'll put it in the tags Incase you don't want to read

[s41nt-b3rn4rd]

guys do you want screenshots of insanity ive said about ocs.

[kindheartedgummybears]

Was listening to talking in your sleep and knew I had to draw...

Her😍😍😍😍🥰🥰🥰🥰

It's nothing but a rough stretch and I didn't put too much thought into the coloring but I'm in love😍🥰

[s41nt-b3rn4rd]

girl. boy. do whatever. thats your purse dog you treat like a webkinz. your feelings are you own. whatever you choose should be of your own volition or however that word is spelt. ill support you no matter what.

ok prommy ill shut up abt this situation but some of u said to confess to him and like. look. its not that im scared hes gonna not return my feelings [tho i kinda am] but its mostly that i dont want to explain the whole"i dont know if i want a romantic relationship at all and i dont know if these are real romantic feelings,, its all very complicated" ordeal

[amodernpersephone]

YOU?????? WROTE WHAT

welp. it was a good run boys. (BOLTS OUT THE DOOR AS FAST AS HUMANLY POSSIBLE)

[spacedkey]

technically one of those clowns is only half based on an ebay one, the one with a funny snout is because i saw one that looked like he had a snout but when i got him his face was flat..

[that-darn-clown]

My little cousin (who turned 13 on the ninth everyone say happy birthday!!!!) Got me into Given and you all have to suffer the consequences

Take a mafuya wallpaper hehe

[k9effect]

SERESHAW RODEO AU

[Click for better quality, tags and reblogs appreciated!]

I thought about Jake as a bull rider and then I thought about Bradley as one of those guys who distracts the bulls while the rider escapes (I learned they are called rodeo clowns) and a whole au spiralled. Admittedly I know little to nothing about rodeos so don't take what I say too seriously.

They both have a LOT of fun doing what they do. Jake is the reigning champ and Bradley is kinda just assigned to his team as a rodeo clown cause Jake trusts him so much. They have many adrenaline fuelled make out seshes behind the scenes after events, just kind of giggling and giddy after a win or a good ride.

There's some good potential for angst, where either of them gets hurt doing what they do and the other takes care of them.

Theyve been stuck in my brain for hours now so I may write a fic for this au lmao. I'll update yall with more thoughts on this au later

Idk, give me your thoughts :)

[s41nt-b3rn4rd]

storyboarding. give me ONE (1) second to send the funniest shit for this. yeah it's oc stuff. yeah it's sasha and sydney.

[s41nt-b3rn4rd]

FUCK YEAH FUCK YEAH FUCK YEAH <- shadow wizard money gang hyperfixation

shadow wizard money gang (we love casting spells)