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uyuforu · 5 months ago

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How to know your Future Spouse's Career with Astrology

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Other posts you could like:

જ⁀➴ Groom & Briede Persona Chart III

જ⁀➴ Groom/ Briede/ Juno Aspects in Natal Charts

જ⁀➴ How to know where your Future Spouse was born with Astrology

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╰┈➤ Get your own Derivative Astrology Future Spouse Reading for 35€ ⋆౨ৎ˚⟡˖ ࣪

ʚ♡ɞ Why the 4H?

ᰔᩚ The 7H in astrology represents the Future Spouse. Based on this house, we can see our Future Spouse's life based on our Natal Chart. This technique is called Derivative Astrology.

ᰔᩚ The technique here is to take our 7H as our FS' 1H. So our 10H will become our FS's 4H. And our 4H will become our FS' 10H.

ᰔᩚ As in Astrology, our 10H is our career, in the Derivative Astrology, if we want to know our Future Spouse' career we so need to look at our 4H.

ᰔᩚ As the 4H opposite the 10H in a chart, our FS' career will be seen through our 4H. So we will focus on this house today.

ʚ♡ɞ The Technique

ᰔᩚ In your 4H, you will need to check the sign it is in. You will also check the degree of the house, but also the ruler, and what planets are in the 4H. We are only going to check planets! Sun to Pluto only!

ᰔᩚ For the Ruler of your 4H, you will need to check where it is in your chart and under what sign.

ᰔᩚ For the planets inside, it will tell us what kind of job and career your FS is in. I'll give all the key words after the examples. For the planets, we will use the ones that are the closest to your IC! So if you have any planets that exactly conjuncts your IC it's perfect! Otherwise, just take the closest. The closest planets to take will need to be 10° apart maximum from the line of the IC!

ᰔᩚ Unfortunately it is very hard to explain this technique just like that, so I will use different examples down below for you to understand better. I want to also add that everything is more about describing your FS' career, and so everything will work with key words!

ᰔᩚ Example: My IC is Capricorn 23°. I will look at Capricorn/ Saturn keywords, Aquarius too because of the degree. I have Aquarius Uranus and Aquarius Neptune in 4H, so I'll look at Uranus & Neptune too.

ʚ♡ɞ Examples

ᰔᩚ My Best Friend has her 4H in Aquarius, which means a career that can be made online, a career related to technologies, social medias also. This can also mean her FS use technologies and social medias as a huge part of their job. This can mean this is a job that is not common, a job that is not safe money wise, meaning her FS can not have a safe salary that is the same every month. With the 6° she also has on her 4H, her FS can be someone very hard working, who is a perfectionist about their career, and someone who doesn't want to play when it comes to their work. Someone who can be recognized for their hard work too, someone people consider one of the best in their field. Here, her 4H is ruled by Uranus, and Uranus is also in her 4H, along with Neptune. With Neptune there, there can be something mystical and mysterious about her FS when working. FS can work in a field that can hide a lot of things, or if FS has to deal with public or clients, he will probably not show his real emotions, play a role in some sort of way. People at work or with the public/ clients can also have a lot of illusions about her FS, not really knowing who they are. FS can also work in an art field, a field that can also be related to music. And this is more logical since Uranus is also in Pisces in her chart. With the big Aquarius energy there, FS can work in a field where they can travel and meet a lot of different people everyday.

ᰔᩚ My Aunt has her 4H in Pisces, so FS can work in an art field, or something related to esotericism, sleep, dreams, the hidden mind, drugs, alcohol, hidden things in general, water, addictions, etc. If we look at the ruler of her 4H, it's Neptune, and here Neptune is in 2H Capricorn. Being in 2H, it makes a lot of sense since her husband works in a food field, and the 2H being naturally ruled by Taurus can be related to food in general. Neptune 2H can be about hidden ingredients in the food, which is what her husband does. He is a searcher and make sure she ingredients written on the food packaging correspond to what is really in the food. And her Neptune being in Capricorn makes a lot of sense there, he is one of the boss in the company, and he also has a lot of responsibilities in his job. Her Neptune also conjunct her Juno, and it's not surprising since they met at work. Moreover, her 4H degree is a Leo one, and her FS is someone who is quite popular at work, first because he has a lot of responsibilities and is one of the boss, but also because he is someone nice and funny.

╰┈➤ Get your own Derivative Astrology Future Spouse Reading for 35€ ⋆౨ৎ˚⟡˖ ࣪

ʚ♡ɞ Keywords & Help

ᰔᩚ Aries/ 1H/ 1°, 13°, 25°/ Mars

A career in sport fields, athlete, a coach (this can be in sport or motivational one), someone who works with their body, a job where FS will move a lot, a job where one will have to go in many different places. Military, dancer, a chef, a leader, a manager, working with fights or wars. A stressful work, a work where you need to take a lot mentally, a lot of mental strength will be reacquired. Doctor, surgeon, justice, lawyer. Engineer, entrepreneur. A sale people. Can also be influencer vibe there.

ᰔᩚ Taurus/ 2H/ 2°, 14°, 26°/ Venus

Can work in art, music industry, fashion industry, beauty industry, luxury, with beautiful things, working with make up, working with skincare, working with jewels, etc. Working with romance, working with weddings, working with women. They can work in the art industry but mostly music or movie. They can also use their voice, so singer can be a possibility. They can be a seller, or a buyer, like buying luxurious items, or selling some. They can work in finance, with banks, etc. Working with Food or restaurant. Being a good critic.

ᰔᩚ Gemini/ 3H/ 3°, 15°, 27°/ Mercury

They can work with the educational system, working in communication, being a writer, an author, working with medias, a platform where people speak, they can be working on social medias, they can also be an editor, journalist, etc. They can also be a teacher, psychologist, counsellor. They can write a lot of their job, they can also drive a lot, move around, touch the public, talk to people everyday, they can be a sell person, they can work with languages, teaching languages, working with tourism. They can work on radio, TV, music industry, they can also be an influencer, a YouTuber, working with podcast, a comedian, etc. Someone who can also work with publishing, public relations.

ᰔᩚ Cancer/ 4H/ 4°, 16°, 28°/ Moon

FS can work with people, for people, a job where there are a lot of women, a job where a lot of women needs help. Working with pregnancies, babies, gynecologist, working in an hospital, a nurse, a doctor, working with children or babies. Can work with food, work in restaurant, a dietitian. Working in art field, mostly music. Working with homes, selling homes, real estate, interior decorating, architect, interior design. Working as a counsellor, adviser, expert in one of those field. Working with families, shelters, etc.

ᰔᩚ Leo/ 5H/ 5°, 17°, 29°/ Sun

Working with fame, working with high class people, working for high class people, working for the high society, luxury world, being famous, a high paying job, making money based off a hobby, working in the entertainment industry, working in the movie industry, having fans or clients at work, being a socialite, having their own business, creative field, art field. This can also mean working with the government, being a leader, an authority, politics. Being a boss or a CEO. Working with children, making things for children (toys, writing books about educations, etc.).

ᰔᩚ Virgo/ 6H/ 6°, 18°/ Mercury

They can work with the educational system, working in communication, being a writer, an author, working with medias, a platform where people speak, they can be working on social medias, they can also be an editor, journalist, etc. They can also be a teacher, psychologist, counsellor. They can work with health, so doctor, nurse, medical industry, they cna heal people, psychologist, working with mental health, pharmacy. They can work with animals too, veterinarian, they can also be into service industry, counseling, adviser. They can be a writer, author. They can be someone who loves to put things in order for someone else, like an assistant, or someone who assist someone. Someone who works with data, someone who analyze. Becoming an expert in something, becoming a doctor.

ᰔᩚ Libra/ 7H/ 7°, 19°/ Venus

Can work in art, music industry, fashion industry, beauty industry, luxury, with beautiful things, working with make up, working with skincare, working with jewels, etc. Working with romance, working with weddings, working with women. They can also work with law, justice, be a lawyer. They can be an advisor, a counselor, they can work with people, a sale person, they can also work in public relation. They can be an interviewer, they can also work with a counsellor.

ᰔᩚ Scorpio/ 8H/ 8°, 20°/ Pluto

Unconventional job, a career that keeps changing, perhaps your FS will do many different jobs in their life, all different from each other, a career or job that can be surprising. A job or career that people will think is weird or will surprise them at first. A career that can be seen as dark or taboo. A job related to money, bank, insurance, assets, proprieties, they can also handle people's money or helping people with their money, etc. This can also mean a job that is related to the occult or esotericism, astrology, etc. It can be a job related to death, handling death, funeral homes, cemeteries, mortician. It can also be related to psychology, handling people at their worst or in their saddest moment too, healer. Surgeries too, so perhaps a Surgeon as well. A job where a lot of researches have to be done, a job where they need to find solutions, a job where your FS can also take care of the risks or stressful situations.

ᰔᩚ Sagittarius/ 9H/ 9°, 21°/ Jupiter

A job related to foreign lands, foreigner, tourism, tourists, working abroad, working with foreign people, working in an airport, working with airplanes, flights attendant. Working with languages, a translator, a teacher, working with education, a writer, someone who also works with the travel industry. Someone who guide, advice. Someone who works in publishing, a journalist, a magazine author/ writer, working with religion, or working with spirituality. Someone who plans, but mostly planning events.

ᰔᩚ Capricorn/ 10H/ 10°, 22°/ Saturn

A job where they are the boss, a CEO, having their own business, their own company, being the best in it, a career or a job that is very well paid, handling money, banker, trading, offering a service to people, working with the government, politics, working with laws, justice, being a lawyer, being a manager. Your FS can do a career where they worked hard to do, or they have been doing for a long time, like preparing for it for a long time, studying for a long time or just mastered a skills to do it. Working with authorities, organizations, high paying jobs too.

ᰔᩚ Aquarius/ 11H/ 11°, 23°/ Uranus

Unconventional job, a career that keeps changing, perhaps your FS will do many different jobs in their life, all different from each other, a career or job that can be surprising. A job related to sciences, technologies, the internet, social medias, it can be an IT job, electronics. Something related to creating something, modernity, avant-garde, innovating jobs, jobs that aren't considered as "real" and secure jobs, Astrology, something related to planes, working with planes, airports, humanitarian, working with people, working for people, helping people somehow, having their own company, working with foreign lands, working with foreigners.

ᰔᩚ Pisces/ 12H/ 12°, 24°/ Neptune

A career in an art field, entertainment industry, music industry, a musician, a producer, someone who works with art but in the shadow, someone who works behind the curtain. Working in the medical field, someone who works with sick people, nursing, doctor, someone who works hard to find what is hidden. A career or job related to spirituality, esotericism, astrology, tarot, intuition, medium, psychic. A counsellor, someone who advices people, someone who also does charity. Working in the movie industry, a photographer, someone who works with art, someone who works with water, or around water. Someone who works with music, poetry. A psychologist, someone who works with the mind, someone who works with mental health.

Thank you for reading!

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so-i-did-this-thing · 22 days ago

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How do I stop being anxious all the time in relation to being trans? I have an appointment to go on T in 2 weeks. I'm anxious about coming out. I'm anxious about someone figuring it out before I come out. Ahhhh. I have a therapist for anxiety but I don't think it's helping.

Hoping I don't make you even more anxious, but the bottom line is some folks *will* find out and you just gotta learn to roll with it.

What has helped me:

Getting good at identifying red and green flags in cis people

It's become a habit of mine to scope out people when I join a new community. I look at profiles, what people post, etc. It's a little tiring, but I try to find the allies and other trans asap in a new fandom or whatever.

Planning for the worst

To be trans is to always have a plan to Get Out of Dodge.

A lot of times, The Worst is really only temporary embarassment. I deal with this by keeping my head held high and leaning into the more "don't fuck with me, I am tired" part of my personality.

Fake it 'til you make it -- I used to have a paralyzing fear of public mortification, and over time have ripped that apart. Sticking to my boundaries helps a lot, and I am not afraid to say, "I will not answer that question."

Here's the thing, though -- people tend to be impressed when you weather the Mortifying Ordeal of Being Known, and you'll likely find yourself as someone to be looked up to. Cis folks routinely ask for my advice about their own Big Life Changes, because they have been impressed to see me go through mine. I've also helped crack a few eggs.

Sometimes The Worst is truly bad, and you should always be vigilant here. Again, I know it is exhausting, but always plan for your personal, emotional, and financial safety. Build an emergency cash fund. Cultivate friends who have your back. Always be looking for new job opportunities. Lots of stuff you can workshop with people.

Cultivating a very matter-of-fact relationship with Coming Out.

I focus on any relevant logistics and keep out my emotional backstory. Most people do not need to know how much of a mess I used to be. And I firmly state what I am doing with my future, rather than ask for permission.

My last HRT-related Coming Out email (to one of my orchestras, which is a very gendered biz) was essentially: "FYI, I am medically and legally transitioning from female to male. Just a heads up, as I'll look and sound a bit different at rehearsal -- I have a tux already for the concert. See you Friday!"

That's it. At a company, you can work with HR on your announcement, assuming one will even be necessary in your case based on your transition timeline.

When I changed my name years later, I was also direct:

"I am legally changing my name to Nicholas. It may take a while to update all my clients, so you're welcome to tell them, "Oh, [deadname] goes by Nicholas now. Thanks!"

And when I came out to my spouse in tumblr chat before our first date, it was literally: "Hey, jsyk, I am 35 and a trans man, in case that changes anything."

It takes a lot of practice to get to this point, and is something you can roleplay with your therapist.

Don't be afraid of your past

I am at a place where I will sometimes casually out myself to make a point ("No one ever needs to change the gender field for this form? I recently needed to.") or a stupid joke ("Ever since I was a little girl, I always wanted to be...").

There is a lot of value in the trans experience. You can decide how much of it you want to casually share, but it does get easier each time.

I hope this helps. Being trans means you will be coming out for the rest of your life (obviously, there are times where stealth = safety), so cultivating a no-nonsense, and even humorous, approach will go a long way for your mental health.

#trans stuff

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sthilarions · 14 days ago

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I’ve seen a few fics wherein, due to various misunderstandings, Charles thinks (wrongly) that Edwin is being/continuing to be touch-averse after they’re together and doesn’t want hugs or kisses. And decides that that’s okay, and he’ll just happily take whatever Edwin wants to give him, and love him however he is. Then, of course, the misunderstanding is resolved, and there are many hugs and kisses.

But I’m kind of interested in the concept of it not being a misunderstanding. Because if 35 years of constant day and night companionship don’t make you completely comfortable with someone’s touch, adding romance to the mix isn’t going to magically change that, you know? Like, for me, I’m touch-averse to at least some extent with everyone on the planet except my brother, and that includes my partner whom I have known for about a decade, whom I love very very much, and whom, on some levels, I love touching.

Because the touch-aversion exceptions don’t really care what label is on your relationship, or even how much you love someone, or even-even how much some parts of your brain like touching them. That’s barely a factor, really, any of those. For me, anyway, if those decades of familiarity and safety and desensitization won’t do it, nothing further will.

So I’m really interested in the idea of an Edwin who’s been kissed, now, but would still answer “Do you miss kissing?” in the negative, just a more informed and confident negative now. Who loves hugging Charles but only sometimes, only when his brain is in the right place and skin and pressure don’t make him feel like electricity’s running painfully through his veins.

And him and Charles learning how to negotiate that. What touches give Charles (and Edwin, because touch-aversion does not necessarily rule out touch-starvation) what he needs without taking from Edwin something it hurts to give. Kisses on each other’s hands, perhaps, instead of the invasive face-to-face sensitive-skin business. Sitting facing opposite directions leaned up against each other, like they’re each other’s backrests.

Two of Edwin’s fingers carefully resting against Charles’s knee, on days when any more would ache, for hours at a time, just that tiny connecting contact but so long and so tender it holds them together as strongly as joined handcuffs. Charles’s head on Edwin’s lap but never the other way around; Edwin’s head on Charles’s shoulder but never the other way around.

Hugs that squeeze hard, never a light half-hug, but also never a trapping one. A hand signal for when Edwin’s brain is willing to do hugs, that tends to lead to Charles diving into his arms no matter the external situation and who’s present, and conversely a signal for when hugs would be too unpleasant to take.

Edwin would be willing to do whatever Charles wanted, of course. If Charles wanted him to spend half his day with Charles’s tongue down his throat and the other half with Charles wrapped around him like an octopus, he would, without hesitation or complaint. He’d probably take the constant ache and electricity under his skin and screaming static inside his head out on clients and Crystal and any bad guy on the wrong end of his casting hand, but he’d not only do it, he’d do his damndest to keep Charles from knowing what it cost.

But Charles knows him far too well, for that. He doesn’t know words like “touch-averse”, sure, but he can certainly notice that a light brush down Edwin’s arm when they’re in a loud room puts more visible pain on Edwin’s face than a high-powered torture hex does, and adjust accordingly.

So they find their little touches, and their big touches, where they can, where they don’t hurt either of them. And Edwin sits on the sofa, with Charles down on the floor leaning back against it, one of Edwin’s hands tangled in Charles’s curls, one-way safe touch, and, fuck. Both of them are pretty sure they’ve never felt anything better in their entire existence.

#dead boy detectives #edwin payne #charles rowland #payneland #autistic edwin payne #traumatized edwin payne #mine

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reignpage · 5 months ago

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Hiii, I hope you're doing well. In your eden AU, who do you think would be more likely to get a divorce? And the least likely?

Great question!!! I love this (not necessarily the direction I’d go with but if I were to be brutally realistic)

Most likely:

Toji and reader

He’d fold under the pressure of peaking in college He’d be insecure about the fact that he’s going from job to job, settling as a coach, teaching and never doing Whereas reader would succeed in her field It’d become a strain on their relationship And god forbid they have a child together Yeah, they wouldn’t last past the age of 35

Geto and reader

Perhaps too controlling He's around hot clients all the time She'd be insecure He'd do a poor job of reassuring her Also, he might be plagued by his depression and lack of faith in humanity He'd dim her light Make her feel bad for being optimistic

Nanami and reader

Might be a bit of a stretch but it's possible He's around intelligent and successful people She could end up as a housewife, no particular passion or talent She'd be insecure about that Accuse him of cheating or thinking she's stupid They'd divorce because of her insecurity and not for his lack of trying He'd give her the divorce because he thinks it'll make her happy Neither of them are

Least Likely:

Gojo and reader

He's whipped. But also social conventions and the world that they live in Gojo's the type to bend over backwards to keep the people he loves in his life If it ever becomes a failing marriage, he'd lose himself trying to keep her But they wouldn't give up

Choso and reader

Also whipped full stop Thinks she created the moon Needs her for his art And I just can't see him developing a flaw that would make her go ew She's very optimistic and cheerful but also smart She'd know how to handle any angst Choso comes under as a tortured artist

Sukuna and reader

They might divorce but I think it's unlikely for different reasons They need their picture perfect marriage for political reasons They're the only people that'd ever understand and accept each other It's the kind of bond you couldn't ever lose Also, I feel like they'd have dirt on each other lol They're also the type to utilise divorce against each other So every time they have a fight and one brings up divorce to make the other cave (depending on the situation, they'd both be likely to actually succumb) The other would say, serve me the papers and you'll see your name on the NEWspapers along with the words 'drugs' or 'murder' or 'bribery' etc etc

#reignpageasks #modern au

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pullupinarari · 5 months ago

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Will you cry if I let go? [LH]

author's note: you ask for angst, you shall receive it. this is just a little something that came to my mind and I was so excited to get back to writing angst that I didn't wanted to post this just as a blurb. this is barely proofread, but I hope you enjoy! mwah

• masterlist

wc: 1790 - english is not my first language! feedback is always appreciated

Four years of dating. By your calculations, that’s around 1461 days, over 35 thousand hours that you’ve spent next to your boyfriend.

Sipping slowly on your glass of wine, your eyes focus on the view of the city right in front of you. It’s a warm, august night. You are sitting at the balcony of your favourite restaurant, the sound of the cars passing by distracting you from your thoughts.

In front of you, Lewis is leaning on his chair, sitting in silence as he mindlessly scrolls on his phone - his eyes never leaving the screen to look at you.

There’s a feeling of sorrow weighing heavy on your chest. But it’s not new - you wish it was. You wish it was something that you just caught on now, that just appeared to bother you tonight. But, unfortunately, it’s not.

It’s been months, actually, since the last time you felt some warmth, comfort inside of you when looking at your boyfriend. You don’t even remember the last time his presence made you smile.

Now, whenever you sit next to him, when your eyes meet in a distant gaze, you just feel cold. The last few months of your relationship have been filled with doubts, numbness.

Looking back, you thought Lewis was the one for you. Your endgame. You firmly believed in your love, in the way he used to be everything you needed, your heart bursting at the seams just by seeing his name on your phone. Feeling all fuzzy and warm inside when he would walk through the door, sending you into a spiral of love with his soft touches and loving kisses.

You really thought he would make you feel it - that overwhelming love that would sweep you off your feet - all the time. But now, you don’t even know what you’re doing in this relationship anymore.

And you know that Lewis feels the same. Long goes the times where he would open up and share his world with you, all the sleepless nights where he would lose himself in you. Now, he barely pays you any attention, and when you walk past him, he doesn’t even bother taking a double look at his girlfriend anymore.

It’s not only his fault, though. You can feel it being a mutual situation of just simply… falling out of love? The sky doesn’t look as blue now, the bright colors are turning grey, the passion slowly starts fading - and even when you dedicate some time to each other, entangled in between the sheets, it’s not the same anymore.

You have your hands all over him, but not a sound leaves your bodies. His kisses don’t taste as sweet, his figure isn’t as warm as it used to when he touched you before. The long hours of love making turned into long days of silence between your bodies, the feelings disappearing in a way that neither of you ever expected to happen.

And, on this special night, on a special occasion, you two were supposed to be enjoying your time together, laughing, kissing, and promising eternal love to the other.

But no. It’s just a moment like all the others that you spend by each other’s side, now. Not even your anniversary could light up a sparkle of joy, not even for a moment. Silence is the only thing stringing you along, feeling as distant from the other as possible.

The owner of the restaurant comes to your table, asking if he could take a picture of the couple that visited his place once again so he could post it online - wanting his clients to know all about how Lewis Hamilton is a regular presence at his restaurant.

Both of you turn your bodies slightly, forcing a smile for the camera - there it is: a picture of the perfect couple, the one that doesn’t even bother talking to each other for the entire night, acting almost as if they are just strangers.

That’s your life, lately. You could say that, whenever Lewis is home, it would feel the exact same as it does when you are alone, but you would be lying. When you are in the same room, the air grows thick, the environment feels heavier, almost making it hard for you to breathe.

Sitting on opposite ends, Lewis scrolls on his phone, while you type on your computer. Both minding your business, as if you aren’t a couple that is supposed to be sharing your lives together.

Even while sharing a house and inhabiting the same space physically, you two need to admit that, emotionally, neither of you is there anymore. Your breathing gets stuck in your chest, the knots in your throats are the only thing that you two have in common nowadays, as you feel yourselves suffocating in the void that you’re immersed in.

After four years of giving your all to the relationship, both of you just feel like you are running empty of emotions to share. After so many weeks of crying, your tears have dried as well. So now, it’s just the acceptance of reality, of what’s happening right in front of your eyes.

As bad as it sounds, sometimes you even find yourself amused by the way things change. The guy you thought you would marry one day and have a family with, is now a dark, cold frame lying next to you, keeping his own distance in between the covers. All the brightness is gone, all the will to invest in your love has disappeared. The love who saved you - so, so many times, is now a memory. The feeling that lingers in your chest when you’re together, just makes you feel a little less alive.

You know how badly suffering can burn: on your skin, dripping inside of your veins with every blink of your eyes. However, Lewis taught you where the door to a caress stands: in him. Your escape from all the reality, from where it would hurt. But how are you supposed to run back to your safe place, when it doesn’t feel safe anymore?

Both of you tried to save your relationship, you really did. You talked about it, you went on vacation - trying to spend more time together away from all the responsibilities and the stress. You would caress his features, he would kiss your temple. For a while, you two could feel the effort being made. It just doesn't work anymore.

And now, there’s a tired sigh escaping both of your lips when you think about an ‘us’. If you two were supposed to work out, if destiny wants you to be together, then your actions should change, but you don’t have the energy to do it. You don’t have it in yourself anymore, and Lewis shares the same exasperated feeling.

Desperation fills your bones sometimes, though - especially when you think about the finitude of life. “It’s better if you search for me while we are still alive” - you often think to yourself, your eyes fixated on your boyfriend’s silhouette. If he doesn’t break the ties now, how can he expect them to break after you’re both gone?

Honestly, you don’t know how you would react to a one last demonstration of his love. If he would come find you now, he could hold you later. Maybe your bodies could meet again after missing each other for so long, burning in the slow fire of the lack you both feel of touch, love, presence.

The problem is that Lewis would come looking for a version of you that doesn’t exist anymore. Time, distance, changed you. And you know it changed him as well - you can see it in his eyes, during the few seconds that you have to look at his features. And maybe that’s the reason why your connection isn’t there anymore: you are both looking for people that don’t exist. People who were once one, but now are the complete opposite of each other.

You need to admit it: your love for one another died. It’s been dead and buried for longer than you would care to recognize. But maybe, all the silence, all the nights when both of you just instinctively turn your back at the other, have helped you mourn the loss of something that would hold you up so strongly before.

With the mourning, liberation has come. You have made your peace with Lewis, accepting the way things happened. And if any resentment arises between you two, it won’t be because of what neither of you has done. From now on, the guilt will belong to your hearts, that have stubbornly insisted on feeling so much in silence.

Suffering is temporary. You can overcome it, you know you can. But the memory of having suffered, who can tear it away from your brain, from your insides? It grows inside of you like a wildfire, heightening the burning again, the one that reminds you of the ending of your relationship - in a never ending loop.

Even if your relationship reached its end some time ago, the truth is that neither of you has the courage to say the words. There’s still a lot of guilt, of care in the air, and the stubborn insistence of not wanting to let the other go, refusing to set them free.

You don’t even know how you would react while hearing those words, let alone thinking about Lewis’ reaction. There’s still a small part of you that dreams with a glimpse of hope, praying to see some emotion from your partner’s side - even if you know damn well that he is just mirroring your actions. Still, you can’t help but wonder: if you had the courage to say goodbye, to cut the rope that holds you together, would he cry if you let go of what you once had?

Both of you should go, honestly, find your paths separately. You often picture Lewis picking up his clothes from your closet, walking out the door while taking with him all the good moments that you have shared. All the memories, the laughs, the love, the best parts of the last four years. And while he closes the door, he leaves you with the sorrow of a deceived desire, the sadness of a love that turned into a lie, into an empty promise.

Just like stones are only able to listen to their heartbeats when rain hits them, maybe both of you will only realize what you are missing, once you take a look at your lives without the other in it. But maybe, by that time, it might be late. When regret hits, you might be old enough to live your love in the city of death.

#lewis hamilton fanfic #lewis hamilton fanfiction #lewis hamilton oneshot #lewis hamilton x reader #lewis hamilton x you #lewis hamilton fic #lewis hamilton #lewis hamilton imagine #lewis hamilton one shot #f1 x you #f1 x reader #f1 imagine #f1 fic #f1 fanfic

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jayflrt · 1 year ago

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𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫𝐬 𝐟𝐨𝐫𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐫 𝐢𝐧 𝟕𝟖𝟔 35. change my world

"I CAN'T STAY FOR LONG," were the first words out of Jay's mouth as soon as you opened the door for him. "I've gotta finish a project when I get back home. She changed the deadline to—hey, what's wrong?"

You looked crestfallen for a moment, but as soon as Jay pointed it out, you perked right back up again. He took a second to study your expression before stepping into your foyer. Your penthouse was always a little intimidating; growing up, Jay couldn't even imagine stepping foot in a place so lavish.

"Nothing. Just trying to make myself busy for next weekend so I don't have to visit my dad," you replied with an unamused laugh. "You free?"

"I don't think either of us will be; Jennie sent us all a text a few hours ago." He held up his phone to show you the messages. "She wants us to be free the entire weekend."

"Friday and the weekend?" you read off the screen before frowning. "Is that when we get hazed?"

Jay shrugged before he cracked a smile. "Guess you don't have to visit your dad, at least." This was perhaps the perfect opportunity for him to get more information on your family—a golden opportunity considering you brought up your father on your own. Before you could change the topic, he pressed on, "But why don't you wanna see him?"

"It's a long story." You sighed, but it didn't seem like you were unwilling to divulge. Your eyes were gleaming a little, and Jay wanted to believe that you were hoping he'd stay. "How about I tell you over ramen?"

He pulled off his jacket before reaching your dining table. There was only one bowl of ramen set out, so Jay paused before he proceeded to sit down. To his surprise, you sat a chair away, looking up at him expectantly.

"Where's yours?" He didn't mean for there to be an edge of suspicion to his voice, but Jay couldn't understand why you wouldn't make a bowl for yourself.

You propped your elbow on the table to rest your chin in your palm. "I just wanted you to try it. How does it taste?"

"You should eat, too."

"Later—just try it!"

Since you seemed so eager, Jay picked up the noodles with his chopsticks and ate a mouthful, humming with delight when the flavor hit his tongue. He looked over to see you beaming at him with anticipation, and he nearly felt his chest stutter from how flustered he felt as you stared at him.

"Good"—he coughed after swallowing down his food too quickly—"it's really good."

You swelled with pride, and before you could open your mouth to respond, Jay cut you off by holding up another mouthful of noodles to your mouth. His other hand was cupped below where the noodles were dangling from the chopsticks.

Like that, you and Jay started talking about school and the Order while you shared the bowl of ramen. Not about whatever was going on with you and your father. There wasn't much to catch up considering he had seen you several times over the past week, but conversation somehow felt so easy with you.

Jay had never been a people person; his social battery was low and he had no interest in expanding his circle. Ever since he moved to Connecticut, his world seemed to grow a little bigger.

And it seemed as though he had a space carved out for you in his heart, but Jay was sure he would be a fool if he tried to fill that void.

The conversation eventually moved to the couch after you and Jay had finished eating and nearly tackled each other to wash the bowl and chopsticks in the sink. Jay was feeling overly-conscious of your knee touching his and the faint scent of your perfume lingering in the space between you two.

It was when you were showing Jay a picture of your dog, Butters, when you brought up your father again.

(Jay had been secretly hopeful that you wouldn't mention him. The more you told him about your life, the more it tore him up inside as he realized he either had to betray you or his client.)

"Butters always gets so happy whenever I'm home," you said with a pout, staring at the picture of your Pomeranian facing the wind. "He must really miss my mom, too." You looked up at Jay again, grinning sheepishly when you saw the confused look on his face. "It was this whole thing from when I was a kid. My parents are separated, but they're not divorced... it's weird. Their relationship was rocky for a long time, but back in freshman year, my mom decided to just leave as soon as I left for Yale. I guess me moving out for college was what she was waiting for."

Jay's heart clenched painfully and he murmured, "I'm sorry. Is that why you didn't wanna see your dad?"

"Pretty much." With a heavy sigh, you leaned your head against Jay's shoulder. He stiffened up for a moment before relaxing—even scooting a little bit closer. "I just keep waiting for them to get together and make up again so that we can go back to being a family. It's, like"—you sniffled—"so annoying."

Another sniffle. You wiped at your eyes furiously, as if you were mad that they even dared to water. Jay kept his gaze down, unsure if you were comfortable with him watching you cry. He wished he wasn't so useless in these situations. You froze up for a moment when Jay brought his hand close to your face, but you closed your eyes and let him wipe a stray tear away.

"You can't tell anyone, okay? No one else knows about this, like, no one," you continued. "Especially not Sunoo."

"Of course I won't," Jay replied, eyebrows knitting together in confusion, "but Sunoo?"

"My mom and his dad used to date, apparently," you said, picking at your nails now. "That's why my dad thinks she wants to leave him."

"Sunoo's dad? But—"

"I really shouldn't get into it any further," you interjected quickly, "because that's Sunoo's business, too."

Sunoo never shared much about his family, so this was all news to Jay. Yet, he was sure he would have found out earlier if your mother was currently with Sunoo's father. Sunoo would've mentioned it, wouldn't he? What was your mother's motive then? Why would she walk out if her intent wasn't to leave her husband for an old flame?

Furthermore, Jay hardly realized that he kept gravitating closer and closer to you, but by the time your head was against his chest and his arm was around your shoulders, he realized he couldn't back away without offending you. He just hoped you weren't able to hear his heartbeat thundering in his chest.

"Is that why you two fell out?" he asked gently.

"Kind of." You angled your neck so that you could look up at Jay. "What about your family? You're always so mysterious."

"Mysterious? You've been to my apartment before."

"Not that—I just wanna know if you have secrets, too."

Jay swallowed thickly. "Everyone has secrets."

"But I wanna know more about you—your story, where you came from," you pressed, shifting your position so that you were facing him. Jay found it hard to breathe when you were so close. "I feel like you hide so much under the surface."

You have no idea, he thought, rueful.

Jay couldn't think of anything in particular that he could tell you, though. The only secrets he had were ones that he had to keep from you no matter what, especially when it came down to his work as a private investigator.

There was one thing, he supposed, that changed him forever. It wouldn't have done him any good to tell you about it—not when the very thought made his throat close up and his eyes water. He didn't even want to see the look on your face when you found out what he had done, what his client had on him.

"You're, like, insanely smart, too," you breathed out. "How is it you know everything? You even impressed everyone in the Order."

"I wouldn't say everything."

You shot him a pointed look. "Dr. Corvera literally offered you a research internship after lecture."

"Whoa." A faint smirk crept to his lips. "Are you stalking me or what?"

"I just happened to eavesdrop." Jay was far too delighted with the way you shied away from him. "But, seriously, why don't you give yourself enough credit? You're like... Master Oogway."

"The turtle? From Kung Fu Panda?" Jay deadpanned.

"Well, he's a tortoise."

"See? I didn't know that."

You scoffed lightly, voice dropping low as you rattled on, "And you're really good at Calculus, too... and you have a perfect GPA. Are you sure you're not—"

"I'm two years older, remember?" Jay cut you off before he could hear any of your theories, hoping that none of them implied that he was any more of an outsider than he felt. "I know how to code and I know around twenty programming languages, so the math sort of comes with that."

His answer only seemed to inspire more amazement in your eyes, and Jay suddenly felt hot even without his jacket.

"My only useful strength is talking to people," you said with a crooked grin, "which is why I'm pretty good at interviews and making people like me."

"I can tell. You're always the center of everything."

"Rude."

"That's not a bad thing," Jay said, shooting you a sideways glance. "People naturally gravitate toward you. You're just..." The whole package was what Jay wanted to say, but he was afraid that would get deeply misinterpreted, so he settled for saying, "You're just perfect."

Perhaps that wording was at greater risk for being deeply misinterpreted.

Your lips were parted for a moment—whether it was from shock or repulsion, Jay didn't want to know—and your eyes had a new gleam to them that he hadn't seen before. He wondered if his comment made you blush because you kept your head ducked down.

(And he wanted to kiss you. He really wanted to kiss you. This wasn't something Jay wanted to make obvious, but he found his gaze lingering on your lips for far too long before he managed to look away.)

He suddenly felt his mouth go dry while his heart did stupid backflips that you were sure to hear. How was he supposed to get himself out of this one? No, no, that wasn't what he meant—oh, but that was exactly what he meant.

"I'm not perfect at all," you said with a laugh. "Is that how you see me?" You shook your head. "I wish I was good at things like you are. I'm not as ambitious as you are either, which is a total waste. I always feel like someone else should've been born in my place."

That certainly would've made this mission much easier for him, but he felt as though your perception of him was misplaced. Ambition? Jay only wanted to help people, and he deduced over the years that he was terrible at that.

"I'm not that great as you're making me out to be," he said. "I'm really happy you think of me like that, but it's not like I've... changed the world or anything."

Jay remembered when he graduated college with Jake. Back then, Jay still had stars in his eyes and hopes for the future. Despite everyone who told him that his skills were better suited for a high-profile job complete with exploitation and corruption, Jay knew that he wanted to do something meaningful.

But that never happened. He was never going to save anyone.

You hesitated before you said, "You changed mine."

Jay sadly smiled at you, mostly because if you ever found out who he truly was, then you would quickly realize that he had probably changed your life for the worst.

Instead, he admitted in a soft voice, "You changed mine, too."

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SUMMARY ▸ private investigator jay park just wants to complete his mission quietly and move on with his life. you, his new assignment who keeps consuming his thoughts, don't make that very easy for him.

AUTHOR'S NOTE ▸ longish chapter to make up for the tiny break i took 🫶

TAG LIST ▸ @zdgx1 @smouches @heesdazed @teawithbucky @leep0ems @peachpie4you @niniissus @kgneptun @jaeyunluvr @zerasari @sophiko22 @iselltulips @hoondiors @baekhyunstruly @jays-property @woninluv @heerinnie @fakeuwus @yizhoutv @theothernads @y4wnjunz @dammit-jjk @en-happiness @mari-oclock @soonyoungblr @jakeslvt @taetaenic @jebetwo @fairysungx @hsgwrld @shmooooo @ineedsomezzz @mrowwww @enha-stars @seongclb @lockburn-castle @alyssajavenss @enczen @calumsfringe @w3bqrl @luvyev @uhsakusa @luvnicho @wildflowermooon @navsnct @hooniesuniverse @enhalov @enhypens-baby @isawritesss

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adventuringanarchy · 1 day ago

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Hans Capon Hardcore Mode "Perks"

Exactly one person on AO3 expressed interest in this and that was enough. tbf I also enjoy seeing that blond man suffer.

Bellator: God has ordained that you are not meant to carry sacks. Or anything, if it can be avoided. Your carry weight is halved on principle and if anyone sees you pick up anything “not befitting of your station” your charisma decreases by 5.

Gilded: You’re used to making people notice you. And Hanush always complains about your “peacocking” because of it. There’s a reason Henry does your thieving for you. You’re naturally more conspicuous and visible, no matter how slow you crouch walk.

Prideful Student: You’re terrible at following instructions and if you’re not naturally good at something you want no part of it. All experience is gained 40% slower.

Lightweight: You’ll never admit it, but you can’t hold your liquor for shite. A shame, considering how much you love drinking it . . . You get drunk quicker and pass out faster. Additionally, you need to drink significantly less alcohol to become addicted.

Mysophobia: You hate being dirty. The worse it is the pissier you’ll get. You don’t want to talk to anyone. All you want is a bath. The usual effects of being dirty are doubled, and you become soiled 30% easier. When dirty all speech experience is reduced by half.

Noble Diet: You’re used to only the finest in life. Now that you’re living off the land eating has become something of a chore . . . Food spoils inside your inventory 35% faster and fills you up 20% less. When gutting animals you can only take half the meat.

Irascible: You’re quick to anger and quicker to anger everyone around you. This has resulted in people trying to punch you in the face. A lot, recently. Everyone wants a piece of you, making them stronger, braver, and more resilient. The effect is multiplied based on the combat skills of your opponent - the stronger the opponent, the greater their buff is. What's more, you take 15% more damage.

Obnoxious Client: Something about your noble bearing compels people to insist upon higher prices when dealing with you. This includes the guards you’re trying to bribe. Prices on all items are increased by 30%. Except the ones you’re trying to sell. Those are reduced by 40%. Bartering patience is greatly reduced.

Silver Spoon: The only stealing you’ve ever had to do was your uncle’s wine . . . on several occasions. And that was with Henry’s help. On your own? You’re terrible at this. Your lockpicks break 20% faster and stolen items in your inventory will be marked as such for longer. Gaining thievery experience is 30% slower.

Distrusted: All that mess in Trosky Castle and Troskowitz must have gotten around. People immediately dislike you. You are more likely to get caught selling stolen items and guards will pull you over for “inspections” more often.

(Was tempted to name Bellator "Noble Pizzle" instead, but I did not give into temptation. This time.) Would love to hear if anyone has other ideas. These games have me by the balls rn

#hans capon #kcd2 #kingdom come deliverance #hardcore mode

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drawing-prompt-s · 1 year ago

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GoFundMe: Getting the kitten to the vet...

for a rabies shot, FIV testing, and a possible upper respiratory infection!

So someone sent in the last $305 I needed while I was asleep. I'm transferring it to my account now which means I'm a) shutting off the GFM as soon as the transfers process and b) taking in the kitten as soon as the money becomes available to me - so likely by Friday I'll take her in, or Saturday or Monday (they do half days Saturday, and are closed Monday).

GoFundMe Link Paypal Link

Venmo Link Cashapp Link

Multiple payment options available because I am typically asked for alternatives to GFM and PP.

$350 / $350

-------------

INFORMATION + VIDEO UNDER THE CUT!

From the GoFundMe description:

Hello!

So, unplanned, there is a new kitten in the house as of Feb. 22, 2024. (Not Jolene's, she is fixed). When at my friend's house - where I will be moving in a few months - we found out that a cat that comes to visit often is not only owned, but a mom. However, the neighbor doesn't want the kittens, so he always puts them outside and leaves them there. I could no, in my right mind, leave the kitten outside by a trashcan and under a tire in February of all months, so I brought her home.

So far I have treated her for hookworms, given her the vaccines I can do myself, and looked into getting a spay voucher from one of the local shelters. The kitten is roughly 3 months old.

However, current concerns are that she may have an upper respiratory infection (and there is always the concern that she could be FIV+). She has an inflamed eye with a regular and concerning amount of discharge and has for a few days. I have also caught her sneezing and she has started coughing on more than a few occasions. She also has a few other signs of sickness - anemia, the runs, and some blood spotted in it. If it is a URI, I need to catch it as fast as possible because I also have Jolene, my 3 year old cat. She absolutely also needs FIV testing and a rabies shot because of that, and because where we are moving there are other cats.

Jolene and the kitten have both been getting along well. The kitten loves to follow her around and Jolene acts more like the disgruntled big sister (don't let her fool you, I have caught them playing regularly - she just needs her alone adult time too).

I have already altered a bit of my projected finances and removed money from my savings to care for the kitten and help her. But there is only so far that can go as I also need to be able to afford gas, food, and furniture for the upcoming move (I'm going to start buying things soon so I can put it together and move my stuff prior to the official move date). I was trying to put off a full vet visit until sending the kitten in for a spay, but with her eye and the possibility of infection spreading to other cats, it can no longer wait.

I am shutting off this GFM as soon as I reach the goal. The vet said to budget for a little more than $300, between the base cost of a visit, FIV testing, rabies, and potential treatment for an Upper Respiratory Infection- assuming it's nothing too major. And I added a little more to what I am expecting because GFM does take a fee from donations.

If the kitten does end up being FIV+ we do have rehoming options available or I will find someone better suited to handle an FIV+ cat (either already having one of their own or a home with no pets).

I tried to take a video of the eye, but as you can imagine, a 3 month old kitten isn't the most keen on staying still, haha.

-------------

Let me add in the breakdown as well, now that I think about it:

Base cost for my vet to see a new cat (even as a pre-established client with other cats treated there): $100

FIV testing: $40

Rabies (and other vaccines I may be missing I was unable to do myself): $35 - $45

And the vet recommended budgeting about $100 for medications depending on what they find (if she still has worms, if she has other parasites due to being outside untreated, if she has a URI like the current concern is): $100

The rest is tax, the % upcharge for using a card, and to negate the fees that GFM with-drawls from each donation.

#prompt prophet #promphet #gofundme #mutual aid #kitten #cat

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maraschinomerry · 3 months ago

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Bottom of the Rainbow

Pairings: George Karim x gn!reader

Summary: after George gets mad at you for keeping a secret, you finally share your unusual hobby with him - searching for the ends of rainbows

Content: sunshine x grump, fluff, mentions of reader's dad (positive), first kiss

A/N: I'm back after nearly a year!! Another sunshine x grump fic, except George isn't really a grump so much as just himself 😅 inspired by but not a continuation of You Are My Sunshine. Thank you as always to my Georges for the support, especially Lisa for beta reading 🫶

Word count: 5.2k

Taglist: @neewtmas @marinalor @ettadear @honey-with-tea @mischiefmanaged71 (to be added or removed, just let me know!)

It was, as most people would describe it, a thoroughly miserable day, and you couldn't be more excited.

As far as the eye could see (which currently wasn’t far at all), London was draped in thick grey clouds, from which poured heavy lances of rain that lashed against the windows of 35 Portland Row like they were trying to break in. The house was quiet save for the dull drumming from the other side of the glass. Lucy was upstairs recording a cassette for Norrie, Lockwood was training in the basement, and George was… somewhere, so you had the living room to yourself. It was rather peaceful really, sitting in your armchair by the window, watching the movements of the sky.

The floorboard by the door creaked as George entered with a huff. So much for peaceful.

“If you're waiting for a client, you're wasting your time,” the curly-haired boy pointed out as he flopped onto the sofa. “We're not expecting anyone and very few people are daft enough to turn out in this weather on the off-chance we'll take their case.”

“Oh no,” you replied cheerily, “just waiting for the rain to die down.”

“Not a fan?” If only he knew. But that was just it, he didn't really know you at all. You'd been part of the same agency, living under the same roof, for 3 months now, and the two of you were still almost as distant as the day you started. Sure, you knew now how each other worked, the way you handled cases, but when it came down to your personal lives you'd found out very quickly how different you were from one another. He was so quick-witted and sardonic, while you didn't have a sarcastic bone in your body. Lucy and Lockwood were able to go toe-to-toe with him, but it was clear he was holding back because they were friends. You'd seen George talk to Kipps once. He was brutal. At least the others had some softness to them, which made you feel a little less like the odd one out.

“Hello?” George's voice brought you back into the room, and you realised you'd been staring out the window again.

“Sorry,” you mumbled. What was it he'd asked? Oh, not a fan of the rain. “I don't mind the rain, actually.”

“Well you live in the right country then.” He'd already picked up his book, and it seemed like he wasn't all that interested in your opinions on the weather or in continuing the conversation at all, so you allowed the room to lull back into the ambient quiet of the pattering outside.

George was quite engrossed in his book, but occasionally he would glance up and find you still watching the rain. What was the big deal, anyway? It wasn’t like it hadn't rained most weeks since you'd arrived, yet every time you gazed out the window like you’d moved to London from a desert. Still, at least you were peaceful with it, creating a companionable quiet for him to read or do research without having to engage in idle chatter. For all your chipper nature and relentless enthusiasm, you were surprisingly reserved. He respected that.

Suddenly, the quiet was broken by an excitable squeak from by the window. George lowered his book in time to see you leap to your feet, face glowing with a smile and the radiance of the sunlight which was finally breaking through the parting clouds.

“Back soon!” you called as you bolted from the room, and within seconds the slam of the front door rang out. Bewildered, George pushed himself up from the sofa and ventured into the hallway. There was an empty space on the shoe rack where your boots normally sat, and the coat rack showed the distinct absence of your yellow raincoat. He opened the front door with a frown, just in time to see a flash of yellow disappear round the corner. The bright pockets of blue that had appeared in the sky caused him to squint, so much so that he almost missed the colours brushed across one of the lower clouds. A rainbow, dipping behind a nearby house.

You returned about 10 minutes later, looking slightly out of breath and considerably less excited than you had when you left. George was back in his place on the sofa, and this time he barely even lowered his book as he addressed you passing the doorway. “What was that all about?”

“Oh,” you replied falteringly, “it was nothing really.” How odd, George thought.

The second time it happened, all four of the group were there. You'd been out for breakfast to celebrate a case well done, and the cafe had provided welcome respite from the rain. Soon enough you all headed for home, when the telltale streak of colour appeared against the vanishing clouds. George was only slightly less surprised this time by the delighted squeal from your end of the line, which was immediately followed by you breaking away in a jog.

“Don't wait for me, I'll see you at home!” you called over your shoulder as you picked up speed.

Lucy frowned. “Should we follow them?”

George was tempted. As much as it didn't really make much difference to him what you did with your free time, he had to admit he was curious where you kept running off to. Still, he shrugged and carried on in the direction of Portland Row and the other two eventually followed.

The coat hooks in the hallway were empty when the trio arrived home, distinctly lacking in yellow. You said you'd meet back here, but with how quickly you were moving they'd assumed you meant you'd get there first. By the time it reached half an hour since you'd gone off, an odd air had descended over the group, tinged with concern.

“Do we know where y/n was running off to?” Lockwood asked, breaking the silence. George had the beginnings of a suspicion, but he couldn't be sure, so he stayed quiet.

Lucy, meanwhile, was less calm. She stood by your chair in the window, peering out every time someone walked by. “Are we sure they're okay? Shouldn't we be going out and looking?”

“Lucy, it's barely gone 10,” George finally piped up. “It won't be dark for hours, they're not exactly in any danger.”

“You've seen the enemies we've made in the past,” she retorted. “You really want to take that risk?”

A bolt of worry shot through George; he tried his best to hide it but was less successful at hiding the way he almost leapt out of his armchair at the sound of a key in the front door.

You sighed as you kicked off your boots. All that for nothing. You'd even gone to all the effort of running with your kit bag, which wasn't exactly light, and it still hadn't been worth it. Sure, lots of the other times had ended up like this, but somehow it stung even more today. At least it seemed like everyone was off doing their own thing so you could sneak up to your room and have some time to yourself.

The living room door swung open, and you caught a glimpse of dark curls.

So much for that plan.

“Where have you been?” George asked sharply.

You groaned quietly, hoisting your bag up and heading for the stairs. “Not now George, please.”

The thud of a second pair of feet on the stairs made your heart drop even further. “No, no, hang on! You can't just run off like that. Do you not trust us or something?”

“George!”

“Well that's what it feels like! We were-” he stopped for a fraction of a second, “Lucy and Lockwood were worried about you. Not even a hint of where you'd gone, what you were doing, how long you'd be…”

You'd reached your room by now, throwing your kit bag onto your bed and sinking down beside it. George lingered in the doorway, but he didn't let up.

“I was just… doing something.”

“Oh,” George scoffed. “So what was so important and secretive that you couldn't just tell us? Were you seeing someone?”

Tears pricked at the corners of your eyes. You tried to blink them away without him noticing. The last thing you wanted right now was to talk to anyone, let alone be interrogated or lectured by someone so cynical that they'd never understand your motivations. “No-”

“Then what?!”

“I was trying to find the bottom of the rainbow!” The words burst out of you in almost a yell, making the quiet that followed twice as loud. Your gaze was fixed firmly on the floor, and yet you were painfully aware of the look of confusion and judgement on George's face. Maybe if you kept staring at that one spot for long enough, he'd finally leave you alone. “That's why I didn't tell you,” you mumbled. “Because I was afraid you'd look at me like that.”

George stood, frozen, just beyond the threshold of your room. He knew he could be harsh sometimes, but his friends didn't usually mind and anyone who did was met with an even stronger retort. He was the way he was, and that had never been an issue.

Until now.

He wasn't sure which part he felt worse about - the fact you thought he was looking at you in some kind of way, or the fact that you were expecting it. The two of you weren't the closest, but you were friends, weren't you? At the very least, you were a team. You were supposed to have each other's backs.

“Sorry,” he started after what felt like an age. “I just… I don't get it.”

“It's nothing,” you sniffed. Hang on, were you crying? Because of him?

George hesitated a moment, weighing up the impact of crossing both a physical and emotional barrier, before stepping into your room. He glanced around, taking in your space properly for the first time. The pile of books on your desk, the faded music posters on the walls, the photos taped around the mirror. And you, seeming smaller than usual, curled into yourself on the bed, still not looking at him. His voice was soft when he spoke, surprising you both. “We wouldn't be here if it was nothing. Help me understand why it matters to you.”

When you still didn't speak, he thought perhaps he'd crossed a line. Perhaps you were finding the nerve to tell him to get out. He didn't normally do things like this, he had no idea what to expect. He was so busy considering whether to leave that he almost didn't hear you.

“It was my dad's idea.”

George turned his attention from the door and found your gaze on him at last. The slight tears on your lashes, the way you chewed anxiously at your lip, the absolute vulnerability of the moment stirred something in him. He swallowed the feeling. He knew your family were still around to some extent, you mentioned them from time to time, but it hit him that you never talked about them in depth, just a passing comment now and again. You never told him anything proper about them. Or maybe it was just that he'd never asked. “Is that him in the photos?” He gestured to the mirror. You nodded, then gave an extra nod towards the mirror in an unspoken invitation.

The pictures, a mixture of Polaroids and film prints, spanned well over a decade. An adorable short-haired toddler, a beaming child with their front teeth missing, a pre-teen who had clearly shot up out of nowhere, all the way up to you in your first agency training uniform. A couple of the shots were of you and your former teammates, but many of the rest featured an older man. The ones that didn't, George suspected, had been taken by him.

You watched George warily, waiting for whatever comment he was going to make next. The comment never came, and you realised that he was actually paying attention to what he was looking at. You quietly stood, your feet sinking into the rug around your bed, and joined him by the mirror.

“That was our first rainbow,” you murmured, pointing to a faded photo. The boy beside you jumped a little, having been too engrossed to notice your approach. He followed your finger to a photo of you, about 3 or 4 years old, grinning next to the boundary of a lush green field. Just beyond the fence, almost lost to the wear of time, was a thick streak across the sky touching down into the grass. The red and blue had sustained the worst fading, but it was still unmistakable. “We came across it by chance, and my dad told me it was special finding the end of a rainbow. He bought me a whole bar of chocolate on the way home, bigger than the ones mum usually let me have.” You pointed out a couple more photos of rainbows the two of you had found and the outcomes - a special dessert one time, a new pair of boots the next. “Even after I started training and found some on my own, something good would always happen. This one was just before I got my first grade.” It was on the far side of the mirror, so you had to lean to point it out. As you began to pull back, you suddenly realised how close you were standing. His face was nearer yours than it had ever been before, and you breathed in bergamot and cinnamon. George wasn't looking where your finger was either; he was looking at you, not the strange way he had before but a new, equally strange way. You felt your cheeks grow warm, and you quickly went and sat back on the bed, this time leaving a space.

“So that's it? You're going after them for the tradition, and to try and make something good happen?” George asked, his attention now fully on you.

You kicked your feet a little, scuffing them along the rug. “Sort of. It's nice getting the extra boost of luck, but recently…”

George came closer, and when you made no protest he perched in the empty space on your bed. He gave you a small, awkward yet encouraging smile. “Your dad?”

You pulled a face, your nose scrunching. George wanted to make a joke about it making you look like a bunny, fighting the urge to call it cute, but now wasn't the time. He let you speak instead. “I told him I'd write and send a photo when I caught my first London rainbow, but that was months ago. I've spoken to him since of course, but only by phone. The longer I leave it, the more I feel like I can't write without having found one. It doesn't feel the same.” There were tears in the corners of your eyes again.

“You'll find one sooner or later,” George said reassuringly. “It's England after all, you've seen how often it rains.”

You laughed, the tension leaving your shoulders as you wiped your eyes on the cuff of your sleeve. “Thanks, George. And thank you for, you know, understanding.”

“Just promise you won't run off on your own any more, okay? Take one of us with you.”

“I promise. I suppose it's safer that way.”

“Well there is that,” he smirked, “and you'll need someone to take your photo.”

—

It had been just over a week, and you were amazed by how much things had changed. You'd never been uncomfortable around George, you'd just accepted that the two of you were too dissimilar to be close, but now you found yourself wondering how you had ever thought that. You found yourself seeking out his company more often, even if you were both sitting in silence doing your own hobbies - last week, his presence had frustrated you, now you almost craved it. It seemed like he sought you out more too. On that first evening, he'd brought you an album full of pictures of his own family to reciprocate you sharing yours. If he was cooking and you were passing through to or from the basement, he'd either start a conversation that forced you to stay for a few more minutes or he'd ask for you to pass him one ingredient after the other until the meal became a joint effort.

One day, you found yourself accompanying George to the Archives to help with research. It hadn't been a successful day by any standard - someone had borrowed the book George really needed, and the article you were after had been badly damaged by an overeager junior Tendy's agent. The worst part was that you were both absolutely drenched from the downpour you'd arrived in. Thank goodness you both had coats, or it would have been an utterly horrible day, but they hadn't protected you from getting soaked from the waist down. Your boots had only just stopped squelching. The two of you called it a day after an hour of fruitless searching for other potentially useful materials, and you turned up your hood as you headed for the door in preparation. The soft grey of the clearing clouds that met you was a welcome relief, and you immediately started scanning the skies as you walked away.

There.

You gasped in excitement at the vibrancy of the rainbow in the near distance. It was the clearest you'd seen in all your time in London. “George!” you called, already starting to head towards it. He hadn't spotted it, hadn't moved. Each second was too precious for you to wait. Without thinking, you grabbed his hand and ran towards the corner. He stumbled a bit at first and his grip tightened around yours, taken by surprise, but he quickly fell into a matching pace. Together you hurtled through the city, narrowly avoiding collisions with pedestrians and lampposts alike. You'd almost lost hope when at last you turned a corner and stopped dead in your tracks. George nearly ran into your back. The colours were fainter than they had been, but they were still clear as day where they fell just the other side of a large puddle. You let out a squeak, and if you didn't know better you'd swear the hand in yours squeezed its encouragement. What was for sure, though, was the way the hand pulled you back as you began to move forward. You frowned.

“Give me your camera,” George prompted.

“Oh, right.” With a hint of reluctance, you let go of his hand and pulled a slim disposable camera from your coat pocket. Once again, George stopped you. He directed you to behind the puddle, with the rainbow landing in front, before cautiously stepping into the road and lining up his shot.

“On three, jump. One, two, three!”

You jumped into the puddle with a joyful giggle, the droplets that flew up around you illuminated by the flash of the camera. George took another still photo in case the first one didn't turn out well before handing the camera back. Through the little window on the back, you could see the number 1. You raised the viewfinder to your eye.

“Whoa, what are you doing?”

“Well, I'm not getting this developed and wasting a perfectly good shot, but I don't want to wait until I find another rainbow to finish it off. Smile!”

George rolled his eyes exaggeratedly, but he was smiling in spite of himself, and you were smiling too as you pressed the shutter.

You weren't quite sure where you'd ended up, so you followed George who seemed to know a route home. It wasn't until you got to more familiar surroundings that you realised you'd been too giddy to notice exactly which way you were going.

“Isn't the house that way?” you pointed back over your shoulder.

George shrugged. “It is, but we're not going home yet. Lockwood and Lucy won't be expecting us back so soon, so we're going to Arif's for doughnuts.”

You blushed. You hadn't expected anything from George when you dragged him along, you were quite happy to wait for the usual moment of good fortune, but it was unexpectedly thoughtful that he'd paid attention to your tradition and considered this. While you were dragging your heels, clearly not wanting to push the boundaries of generosity, he bought you a rich chocolate doughnut with a salted caramel filling (the kind you'd secretly eyed up before but found too decadent to buy yourself) and a strawberries and cream one for himself. Stepping back out into the sunshine, you sat together on a small bench across the road to eat. The wood was a little damp from the rain, but without hesitation George laid his coat down and sat on one half. You were about to remark about him catching a cold as you squeezed yourself onto the other half, but the warmth radiating into your side caused the words to die in your throat. You nestled in a bit closer; if George noticed, he didn't say anything about it. You unwrapped your sweet prize and held it up, beaming when George touched his to it in a silent toast.

“That was… kind of fun, actually,” he said almost like he was surprised at having enjoyed himself.

“It was!” you grinned. “It was nice having someone to share it with again. And thanks for the doughnut.”

George thought for a minute. “So what's next, you write to your dad and then what? Look for the next one?”

“Exactly. I find it quite encouraging in a way, knowing that whatever happens, however bad things might get, there are always going to be more rainbows. It's got me this far.”

“Well I hope there's a bit of a break before the next one. I'm a researcher, I'm not used to all this running around.”

You blinked. Was he implying he wanted to join you again? And why did you hope that was what he meant?

Lockwood was draped across the sofa when you got home. He peered over the top of his magazine as you closed the front door.

“That took a while. Was it a productive session?”

You worried at your lip. You still hadn't told Lockwood or Lucy about your unusual hobby, and in the moment you felt a bit silly to have been running round and having fun when you hadn't done the work you set out to do. You glanced nervously at George.

“Sort of,” the other boy replied, giving you a reassuring look before turning to Lockwood. “Although I want you to know that if I ever get my hands on the agent who spilled coffee over that newspaper article I was telling you about, I will not be held responsible for my actions.”

“Y/n, I think you need to accompany George more often, we can’t afford to be blacklisted from any other establishments,” Lockwood winked at you.

“In that case,” George faked a scowl, “perhaps they ought to accompany me while I make us lunch so I don't set your kitchen on fire.”

You nodded, before glancing pointedly at Lockwood. It was time to come clean. “I'll be with you in a sec.” Thankfully, the curly-haired boy got the message, and left you to explain in your own time.

—

Everyone had been very supportive, much to your relief. Lucy had gone rainbow-hunting with you a few times over the following months, Lockwood a couple more, and on one occasion you'd ended up taking the whole team with you on the way back from an errand. It was fun getting to spend time and share your passion with them all, and now you had a whole new array of pictures being developed that you couldn't wait to add to your mirror, but you had to admit that your favourite were the times when it was you and George. You'd been out searching together again just before you collected your first photos, and it wasn't until you reread the letter to your dad before sending and noticed you'd dedicated an entire paragraph to talking about your coworker that you finally admitted to yourself why that was the case. Something good did always happen still, regardless of who you were with, but with him it felt different. He always put in that little bit extra. And gradually, you felt different. Before long you were analysing almost every interaction the two of you had - every late night conversation in one of your rooms, every time his hand grazed yours or he made the effort to give physical contact when you needed reassurance on a case (he didn't do that with anyone else, but that didn't mean it meant anything, right?). You tried not to read too much into it all, telling yourself that even if things had changed it was only because he felt obliged to keep an eye on you so you wouldn't run off again.

You'd now been with the agency just over 6 months, marking 3 months since you'd first run off and started this whole chain of events. Last night had been a particularly rough case, so you were letting off steam in the basement training area. The powerful beat of your music drowned out your grunts of frustration as you swung your rapier through the jets of air, and you yelped when suddenly you spun round to find not a white cloud but George. Clearly you hadn't heard him coming down the stairs. Time seemed to slow as you stumbled backwards, terrified of hurting him or worse, that you'd already done so. One of your feet caught on the other, and you felt the blade fall from your hand as you grasped for something, anything, to stop you from falling. A hand, warm and steady, wrapped around your waist. You gaped up at George in surprise. He seemed just as shocked, though whether that was because of his action or because in the heat of the moment his fingers had caught under your top and gripped the skin above your waistband, you couldn't say. Another blast made you jump, bringing you back to reality, and you frantically hid your blushes as the boy flicked off the training equipment and mouthed something, his words inaudible. You launched yourself to the stereo and paused your music. The silence was deafening.

“I take it you couldn't hear anything, then?”

You frowned, wondering what you were supposed to have heard. Had he been calling you? Then, out of the quiet, a sound emerged. A persistent pattering on the window. Rain.

“You need to come outside right now.” He offered you his hand. Blushing again, you took it, and he led you up the stairs and through to the hallway. You'd been so caught up in the moment that you hadn't realised he was wearing his coat until he took yours from the hook and helped you into it. Hoods up, you both stepped out onto the street. You glanced around. This had to be about a rainbow. But where was it? George gently placed a hand on your shoulder, moving you until you could follow his eyeline.

You gasped.

There in the distance, glorious against the grey clouds, was the most vibrant rainbow you'd ever seen. Above it, much paler but still noticeable, was a fragment of inverted colours. A double rainbow. Frozen in awe, you almost forgot the urgency of the situation, until George took your hand again and started running. Together you wove through the streets, occasionally calling directions or words of encouragement as you drew closer. The colours remained ever vibrant, a beacon of joy across the sky. You found yourselves in a small park, where the main arc of the rainbow touched down into the grass beside a wooden gazebo. Both of you were panting, but you no longer needed words to communicate; George simply held out his hand, and you passed him your camera. He couldn't help but smile behind it as you twirled through the rain with a laugh, feet sinking into the sodden ground, and gave the biggest grin he'd known you to have, even in the photos he'd seen. Then he came closer, turning the camera round and pulling you into his side as he snapped a photo of the two of you. Soon the adrenaline wore off and you were faced with the fact that you'd just run all the way here and it was still raining, so you climbed into the gazebo and slumped down onto a bench. George sat beside you, leaning his head back against a pillar.

“Can you believe that's the first time I've ever seen a double rainbow?” you sighed. The feelings were overwhelming. You'd barely believed you would ever have this experience, of course you'd always thought you'd share it with your dad but somehow being here with George felt like everything it needed to be.

“Seriously? That definitely deserves a celebration.”

You giggled, leaning playfully towards him.

“Does that mean doughnuts on the way home again?”

Something in his demeanour shifted and you worried you'd pushed things too far. His smile was smaller, wavering, and his hand went from almost brushing yours to playing with the hem of his coat.

“Sorry, you don't have to-” you began.

“No, it's… I meant something bigger, since this is such an important moment for you, like, um, like dinner?”

Why was he so nervous about that? It was a great suggestion! You loved nothing more than the times you spent cooking together and it was sweet that he'd realised how much it meant. “Sure,” you reassured him, “what shall we cook?”

He swallowed thickly, voice coming out low and cautious. “Actually, I meant could I buy you dinner?”

Maybe it was the clouds starting to clear. Maybe it was later than you thought and the ghost lamps were starting to come on. Maybe it was just your own obliviousness finally crumbling. Whatever it was, you looked at George in a whole new light, at the way he was watching you carefully and expectantly.

“George Casper Karim, are you asking me on a date?”

He hesitated. “That depends on whether you're saying yes.”

You moved closer and planted a quick kiss on his cheek. “Does that answer your question?”

George began to lean in, but then he stopped. You started to worry again that you'd done something wrong, until he took your hand and led you from the gazebo. It was just drizzling now, the droplets coating his dark curls in a fine mist and splashing onto your own hair as you stepped outside. The rainbow was still there, fading as the rain died away, and as you were drawn towards its colours George spun you into it, catching you by the waist and bringing his lips to yours. Your mind was filled with fireworks, interlaced with that cosy cinnamon scent which had grown so familiar. He felt and tasted as warm as the sun which was starting to re-emerge, and as his hand came up and settled on your chin, thumb stroking across your cheek, you decided that the photo he'd just taken of the two of you would be going in pride of place on your mirror.

#lockwood & co #george karim x reader #gn!reader #lockwood & co fanfic #lockwood & co x reader #save lockwood and co

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