#the chapter where he learned about the oldest dream?

[triopsarecute]

Come to think of it ORV had a better impact on my mental health than my therapist.

[acid-ixx]

How do think readers relationship with each of the batfam would be had they not been neglected?

what if...? ft. domestic headcanons w/ your family

series masterlist &. request masterlist — long post ahead !

reblogs and interactions are encouraged and appreciated.

a/n: 6400+ words, no beta i'm genuinely insane. help i literally thought abt this yesterday !! i may or may not post a drabble about this one specific dream the reader had about where they had a normal relationship with the batfam but at the same time i want to implement it in the next chapter instead so have food for thoughts instead! slight spoilers below. also please do comment and reblog if u like this ! ^^ supporting my writing just makes me further motivated to write even more !

if you were never neglected by your own family, then i could say that the process of them turning yandere would be a tad bit better or worse. i'm saying, because of your past and because of an incident during your elementary years (that could've been avoided if your family actually never ignored you; so let's assume that that incident actually never happened but it opened a gateway for an even more protective family) the batfam could easily be either a dream or nightmare.

let's say it was bruce and dick who had picked you up from the police station. the moment he sees his own firstborn child, all his thoughts would circulate from just how broken and hopeless you absolutely looked, how the injuries litter throughout your entire body, the way your empty eyes stare at anything.

the child, his child, looked exactly like him all those years ago. he knows just how painful it is to bare losing all your loved ones.

he wouldn't hesitate to approach your form, immediately picking you up and letting your head lean on his shoulders as dick follows in tow, cooing about his significantly younger sibling.

that would be the first time dick would call you his baby bird, with the way you'd stare at him with mixed emotions in your eyes.

if him and dick were to hear about what happened to you inside your old apartment from the police (drugged and abused by the same men who took your mother away from you), then be guaranteed that batman and nightwing would be more brutal during their patrol afterwards (dick would even take more weeks off from bludhaven just to care for his younger sibling), even going as far as formulating a plan for your captors, having oracle stalk each and every person involved in your life.

if anyone thinks the vigilante would abide by his no-kill rule then they're wrong, because he'd turn a blind eye for once if dick were to brutally stab someone at any moment. why? because batman will not settle until his own child's attackers are thrown into putrid prison cells with no guarantee that they'll see the light of the day. the criminals should be grateful that red hood isn't even in the picture yet.

your father would be more perceptive of your emotions if he had never neglected you. he will always be the one giving you rides, he'll shield you away from the mass media trying to take photographs of you— and you're getting carried throughout the manor if your little body were to even express fatigue.

bruce wayne wouldn't admit it, but he absolutely cherishes you and your youth. he had adopted dick and grayson when they were above the age of ten, when they were already growing some sort of consciousness about the world they live in. but you? you're so small and you have so much to learn, your innocence is something bruce would protect. you'll be absolutely coddled by your father, your grandfather figure, alfred, and your oldest brother, dick. even future members of the family knows just how important you are maintaining their sanity.

that means you have the manor in the palm of your hands. you had a nightmare tonight? don't worry, your dad would always be one step ahead of you and would immediately be in your room. hell, if you were comfortable enough, you'd be sleeping in the same bedroom as your dad for the first few years you'll live inside the manor. he'll read you bedtime stories if you want and even have alfred prepare you warm milk or chocolate before you go to sleep. his entire schedule would also be centered around you, making sure that he would always arrive on time from business meetings to have dinner with you, and coming home early from patrols. if he leaves the manor before you're set off to sleep, then he'll be giving you a good night's kiss whilst alfred would be the one substituting for your nightly bedtime stories.

you may call him overbearing once you start to notice the signs the more you grow older, but your father will always track your sleep schedule - he even makes you wear a watch that records your heart rate - from the moment you drift into dreamland to the times you get nightmares— he makes sure the food you eat before dinner is light, booking appointments with nutritionists to make sure you're healthy. he even does specialized training with you, for self defence and to also maintain a healthy lifestyle.

and dick grayson? his visits to gotham would be more frequent. even if his relationship with bruce is strained, he'll always be in the manor faster than you could say 'i miss you' to your older brother on the phone. he loves coddling his baby bird, especially since you were adopted right after jason's death; dick doesn't want a repeat of the past, always making sure you get proper cuddles and affirmations.

spending time with dick means you get all the power to draw on his arms or face or make arts and crafts with him. he enjoys it when his baby bird is at their comfiest state so even if you were seated on the floor, there would always be cozy blankets that count as your chairs and snacks right beside you. you could ask him to get something for you and he's right at it.

he would be the older brother who normalizes physical affection in the household. dick would constantly kiss your cheeks, your foreheads, and any injuries you would obtain (a habit that even bruce adopted once your dad realized how it's an effective way to soften your cries and ease your heart). he's not afraid of picking you up even! always tossing you to the air under alfred or bruce's supervision whenever you feel down. dick would always hold your hand, too, as an assurance that your beloved older brother is always there for you.

you'd probably ignore all the red flags he carries around because of how early he shows off his signs of obsessiveness. so don't question it if him and bruce wouldn't allow you to go to sleepovers with your other friends or if sometimes, just sometimes dick feels the need to just have you in his arms for hours without end after particularly brutal patrols. you're the only person holding him up and if he doesn't breath in that reminder then he might just lose himself.

your brother would literally prioritize you over anything else. he can and will pick you up from school, he makes sure nobody in your class is there to bully you, he'll spoil you with sweet treats whenever bruce is too busy with business meetings. he wants to be seen as your favorite ever since he's discovered himself to be your idol, so he'll always show off his acrobatic skills for your eyes only.

whenever dick would say "i love you!" it always translates to, "if you want me to, then i will give you the world." which means he'll drop anything he's doing right now the moment you invite him over to design your diaries or sketchbooks.

your talents very early on would be heavily acknowledged by your family. that means any single drawing or craft you'd do, whether poorly done or not, would be stored in very protective places or shows off in every crevice of the manor. any father's day gift from you would be framed in bruce's personal office, a personal reminder to him that you are the light at the end of the brooding tunnel he puts himself in. so even if he can't always be there for you, he will always have you in his mind and in his heart.

your existence in the manor would prove to be a healthier way for bruce to cope, for him to get his mind off of the loss of his second child. whenever he looks at you, he'll always be filled with a determination to protect gotham from any further danger, to save the city - if not himself, then for your sake, for his baby to feel safe whenever they would walk on the streets, for his baby to feel protected whenever you two would eat in fancy restaurants or go shopping for your diary's supplies.

criminals would immediately get the message that messing with you means getting on the bad side of both batman and nightwing. you may be the child of bruce wayne, (name) wayne, but if they even think of kidnapping you for ransom then they should pray; pray because if batman's baby even gets a single nick, a single droplet of blood on their body then they're gone. there's no such thing as holding back if it comes to you.

now, your older sister figure, barbara gordon, despite her constantly being busy because of her role as the oracle, would find ways to at least entertain you whenever you would visit her in the batcave. if you feel like your father's overprotective nature and your older brother's coddling is too much, then she will be offer you solace by her side. she may not always be physically there but you two are as close as you are to the other members of your family because you're a creative one. it's not often barbara gets to spend time with someone like you who enjoys having her as a muse for your art pieces. she allows you to also style her hair, and if you like to design clothing, then she'd be your model for as much as you want.

barbara is also your go-to for when dick and bruce are both unavailable. she lets you watch her hack through multiple security systems, explaining concepts that you don't understand. and, because she's the most emotionally stable out of all of them, you'd prefer gossiping to her about your school's drama compared to dick, as she actually gives you helpful advice!

well, little do you know that she had already hacked your school's camera footage and wired multiple recorders on your bag but you don't have to know that! after all, barbara wants to keep the only sane person in the household safe and happy. she's not openly obsessive towards you, but whatever secrets you have that don't compromise your safety are secrets she promises she will bring to the grave. that means if you ever have a crush on a someone then she will hide it from the others.

... that is until you actually end up trying to get into a relationship too early for even her eyes then she won't hesitate sending out the signals to bruce and the others. she can't afford exposing her younger sibling to heartbreaks and emotional attachment towards strangers! so do forgive her if there are times where you feel like there's someone constantly watching your back, because she is that someone; with all the intentions in the world that you wouldn't have to go through what she did with the joker or any other villains who could whisk you away from their arms.

it's obvious that, of course the oracle will use all the power in her hands to guarantee all eyes are on you, so that there would never be an opening for any danger towards you. even if you do know that she's the one in-control of the strings, there's not much you could do but accept it.

then there's tim drake. your brother who had stalked batman and nightwing just to prove a point. his parents are alive and he's fine being on his own, but fuck it if he prefers being in the wayne manor! once you're introduced to tim, he's immediately researching about the first biological child of bruce wayne. and thank god bruce requires the two of you to become familiar with each other because you're just so interesting to him, you and your curious eyes, your small habits— the way you shift in your position as your father's hands are clasped on your shoulder protectively.

tim can already feel himself blast off in excitement just solving the mysteries about you! yet he doesn't know it in himself that the longer you spend time with him, the more the urge to just stitch himself into your very life grows stronger.

if you were never neglected by your own family then you would instead be analyzed constantly. tim is just another set of eyes constantly watching you, but unlike the others, he picks off every single detail about you to a T.

you, your interests, your hobbies, your favorites, your friends, you name it; he will have an entire collection of case files on everything, picking apart your very mind to the seams. it's like he's eating up the information about you, spending sleepless nights researching about a movie you two would watch soon, because the look of amazement in your eyes feeds the growing love he has for his sibling.

at first he'd never understand why bruce and dick seems so smitten towards you other than the case regarding your mother. but he slowly starts to understand why— because just like him, you're perceptive of his well-being. if dick isn't around then you're always the one hanging around his room, visiting him with snacks in your arms or an invitation to watch a cartoon show.

he likes doing your assignments for you, especially your projects even if he neglects his own duties for his own school. and despite how emotionally constipated or unaware he seems, he's obsessed with your personal life. that means you don't even have to rant to him about school drama or your friends or crush because he can and will know it. what he doesn't like, though, is when your attention is towards anything but him. he may not be the most physically comfortable to cuddle but he will offer you his jackets which he would end up not washing right after you use them, instead he wears them, feeling closer to you than ever.

it even lulls him to sleep for the times you're unable to sleep over at his room.

tim may not know how to comfort you like dick whenever you wake up from nightmares but he does know ways to avoid them; he knows a lot of strategic methods to get you drowsy after a moment's panic.

bonus points if you cuddle him afterwards! he loves the warmth that you emanate, loves it when your body leans against him and makes him feel so important. tim loves it when you snuggle him unknowingly, tightening your already bruising grip on him, he loves reciprocating it too, feeling a special bond with his sibling that not even his parents could offer.

though he doesn't openly tell you that he loves you, he does so in his own ways! you don't want to see an entire photography room dedicated to his younger sibling— most pictures contributed by tim. you don't want to see the terabytes of files that are all about you and your interests, millions of video imagery of just you sketching or writing diary entries, sometimes eating or rambling senselessly. you don't know it but tim loves playing the videos of you in the background, especially the ones where you're humming a tune or singing a lullaby; those are his favorites.

it's not his fault that you're just so interesting to him, that your presence is so comforting, that you're the only person closest to him that has the ability to make him melt into you, unknowingly succumbing to your spoiled wishes.

jason todd comes into the picture later, and he is a very enraged man. he's mad at his replacement, at bruce, at you, at the entire universe.

at first he just doesn't understand anything. he doesn't understand why bruce finds it so easy to not only replace his status as robin but to also bring in another child, who's valued and loved more despite not taking the mantle of robin. he's mad at just how quick he was replaced, how it seems like bruce never avenged him, and yet if he threatens your safety then the old man suddenly turns violent towards him?!

jason wouldn't bring you into the fray, because you're unaware of the entire situation, but fuck, he doesn't understand why you are just so cherished when he'd watch the news and sees your picture plastered all over the reporters' walls, talking about the child who bruce never allowed to separate from his side. they talk about how you're the sheltered one, the hearthrob of all media with just how clingy the billionaire is towards his supposed younger sibling.

he's not jealous, he gets why bruce is protective and smothers himself all over you; but he hates feeling replaced, feeling discarded and forgotten by the very man who'll avenge your death if that ever happened.

hence why he has to see it for himself, has to see you for himself. it's a coincidence, a miracle actually that he just seems to easily find you by the kitchen of the manor— a manor whose aura is now different from last time, it seems like it now reeks of life, of personality. clearly you were the main cause of all of this.

you could simply be reading a book and sipping your nightly tea, but jason would soon realize just how... vulnerable you are at the moment. you find him hiding in the shadows and all you offer is a wide stare with no sense of self defense whatsoever. it's the same vulnerability that he sees off the cruelest streets of gotham. you're exactly like the innocent kids who get brutally murdered without justice, just like the children who have never once gained penance for the torture they had to experience just living off of personality.

jason isn't a dumbass, living near the crime alley means hearing the gossips of every citizen. your name, or preferably your last name is famed even in the underground. your mother is infamous for catching the attention of most crime lords by running off with their cash, successful staying hidden to care for her child, just right until she met her untimely demise. you lost her early just like how he lost his mother early as she had fallen victim to drug overdose.

he'll discover why gotham's vigilante seems to be so protective over you. the way you carry yourself, the warmth you give off as you offer him your leftover dinner despite not

you told him that your dad taught you to never talk to strangers— but clearly he's not because "how else would you be able to trespass the millions of security alarms in the manor? you must've lived here before." you'll state as if it's the most obvious thing in the world, sipping your drink before you offer him a seat next to yours, unafraid of the dangers that lie ahead of you—

"you must've really been pampered by the old man, huh?" is all his reply, the voice changer of his makes him sound naturally intimidating, like he's ready to attack but no, that's not his intentions with you. he'll take a seat beside you, try to make out what book you're reading and that's when he knows that you truly have no idea that it's your dead brother who's talking to you. you have no idea of his resurrection whatsoever as you start to mumble off about the novel— he finds it quite amusing that, finally, he's not the only guy who enjoys literature in the family, even going as far as to recommend his own fair share of favorite novels to you.

once he leaves out of the window after a seemingly long session of talking, definitely aware that yes, bruce does have a microchip inserted under your skin, and the watch you're wearing has a voice recorder that sends recordings straight to the batcave's system; jason takes note to visit you more often, finding the normalcy you offer very welcoming.

he likes it, likes your mellow behavior. he'll even admit that you're the only proof that bruce can, in fact, raise a child right, even if that means tracking their entire life. but that's the old man's love language, and jason knows it in himself that he's already planning for a way to take you to ride his motorcycle at night without bruce's knowledge; just so his angel knows the feeling of gotham's breeze flowing through their hair since bruce seems to love dictating your every move.

once he does form a solid plan to take you away, even just temporarily, you don't have to worry about the criminals who litter the streets because jason made sure that nobody's gonna mess with him and his angel's bonding time together.

the youngest, damian wayne, and the second biological child of bruce is a special case. his upbringing as an assassin makes him susceptible to his fits of tantrums. the first time he steps foot into the manor is the same time he will threaten anyone around him; and that includes you, the bastard child. quite frankly, your first greeting with him would be the same as the one in the original storyline, you'll greet him with a tray of sweets in your hand and a small smile and he'll reply with a sword on your neck. but the difference would be the undeniable fact that dick and bruce immediately stopped him from even nicking your delicate skin.

dick's swearing was shut down by alfred's scolding and you, again! pulling on your oldest brother's sleeve with an assurance that you're okay.

that's the very first time he sees his father truly reprimand him with nothing but rage in his eyes. despite damian's annoying antics towards his father the entire day, it seems like you were the snapping point.

his father, bruce wayne, made it very clear that he can mess with anyone and everyone in the family but you. that you have nothing to

his only reply would be a sneer as he demands they take him to his room immediately, unable to shut you down when you offer to help bring his luggage despite bruce's firm unwillingness and dick's hesitant request that his baby bird should instead spend time in his room instead.

but it was always your word above everybody else's and damian hates that, hates that everyone just seems to succumb to your request as long as it doesn't compromise your safety. the bitterness that keeps resurfacing in his heart whenever he sees you wearing tim or dick's jacket, or if he caught sight of bruce giving you affection was a feeling he tried to convince himself wasn't jealousy.

not jealousy towards you, no, but towards them. your behavior towards him was nothing but kind, a kindness that was taught to him as weakness. he thinks you're weak and undeserving of being spoiled and yet he hates it whenever he sees his blood sibling (whom he called a bastard child so many times) become too close with anyone but him.

he hates it, he hates you and his conflicting feelings. he hates it when he pushes you away, hates it when he sees you pout after another failed attempt at trying to have your youngest sibling talk to you.

and as the days or even weeks pass by, with all your effort to try to bond with him, with the days where he can feel dick's energy drain because you insisted on spending time with damian instead of dick again, with tim's intolerable treatment towards the him because you chose to bother damian instead of that loser— are the days he feels himself actually becoming closer to you because he relishes in your insufferable behavior towards them, because you just seem so sweet to him.

damian feels that it's right that you make him the exception.

so it's inevitable that damian will eventually discover both your talents towards art and the love for nature. it's a mistake, really, when one day as he stalks through the hallways he'd find you in your own atelier, painting a portrait of a robin with a color scheme that matches his vigilante suit. the beams of sunlight seems to hit you just right because you looked so at peace with your surroundings, humming a tune, unaware of your youngest brother who has found himself at your most natural state.

he'll budge in without moment's hesitation afterwards, steering clear behind you as he analyzes your art. it would only be after a few minutes would he announce his presence in the room, expecting you to scream at him to buzz off but all you did was jump in your seat, looking back to eye the intruder only to find out it was damian all along, offering him a smile and a seat beside you.

after he does so, you'll both end up spending the entire day bombarding each other with art tips and animal facts. he'll give you comments about the bird's proportions and you give him guidelines on how to properly mix your colors without it looking muddled. it's like you two are meant to be siblings because damian swears he ended up clinging to your side after your painting session, refusing to even seat beside anyone during dinner time if it isn't you because he's not done rambling about the rainbow eucalyptus you had told him you'd seen in a nature documentary once— so it's rightfully his place to be beside you and not drake's or grayson's or even his father.

eventually you two would be as close as peas in a pod because you're seemingly the only one who knows how to calm him down, the only one with the right to raise your voice at him and to ask him of favors because you're his blood sibling. and because you both share the same blood, that means you both should share clothes that complement each other, share snacks and treats, share matching bracelets and necklaces and any jewelry, you're the only one allowed to hang around his room and him in yours.

the others find it annoying that you let him be, but what choice do they have? unless they would like to hear an earful from damian then they should stay silent because you both aren't done painting each other's nails yet!

stephanie brown is shortly introduced to you after her incessant insistence on meeting you right after stepping foot into the manor. she knows of your internet fame for being the beloved bruce wayne's 'favorite' child and she's not afraid to admit that you are indeed adorable in person! unlike your first meeting with damian, steph would immediately coddle you at first glance, insisting you call her by 'steph' and that

due to the short period of time as her robin and her being constantly reprimanded for her antics, you'd take it in yourself to become closer with her, and she accepts your offer without any complaints. she's also one of your muses for your art and it's a good thing she has a sense of style unlike your brothers who are either too flashy (you had to stifle a laughter looking at the discowing costume) or too dull. damian's fashion sense is good but he's often out during the time period you spend with steph, and even if she often doesn't stay still, you at least hsve someone to talk your ears off whilst you try to sketch the poses she chose.

her obsession towards you stems from your willingness to "match her freak" or whatever internet lingo she finds that day, but she's a fun company to be around! she's always there for you when you need to rant about anything regarding your feelings, especially since you're at the age where you're a teenager and your emotions towards your family would be all over the place and she'd relate the most towards that.

so other than barbara, you'll find yourself speaking up about any concerns you have to steph, and she turns your 'favoritism' towards her her entire personality.

but if you think of even spilling your secrets about a highschool crush to steph or news that someone had asked you out for prom them then spoiler alert! don't. like her mentor, steph will drop signs and clues and your brothers would promptly deal with that. awe, don't worry about feeling alone though or if you weren't permitted to go to your highschool prom because steph and babs will be the ones to convince bruce to throw you your own very elegant gala where you would dance with only your siblings!

see, isn't she so strategic that way? psht, you don't need a boy or a girl acting as your temporary reprieve when your entire family is there for you! steph is here for you and you did technically promise to go out with her today to go shopping so...

it's not that she isn't on your side, no! but you're very much the entire family's baby and she doesn't want you losing your attention on her, definitely not! her goofy personality towards you really does cover her intense urge to be by your side really well. unlike damian, it's not obvious that she's trying so hard to monopolize your time for herself but you're just so fun to be around and she's at her best behavior when it comes to you.

so what's wrong if she ditches her other friends to bond with her beloved sibling? it's not like they'd understand what it's like having someone who actually looks at her for her rather than just the surface level.

don't question why most of the gifts she had given you (which ranges from attires like jackets and shles, to matching bracelets, even little fidget toys) all don a shade of purple and blue! and don't also question why her gallery is filled with cute selfies of you and why your phone's lock screen wallpaper is now suddenly matching with hers.

after all, steph likes making it known that you are her favorite!

cassandra cain, when she first saw you, is, of course, silent. but she makes her presence known quickly after she has enough proof that you've no fight in your body. she may not be the most expressive in words but she is through actions.

you were actually the one who had first approached her after bruce initially introduced you two to each other, offering her a handshake and a greeting in sign language. albeit it being crusty, and her insisting that it's alright if you do the talking, it seems like you were more than willing to learn sign language just for the sake of your new sister and she likes it.

she really, really likes it, appreciates how there were no signs of malice in your movements and just how comfortable you seemed with someone who could potentially end your life with just a snap of her fingers. and yet you treat her like she's not a weapon of murder but rather another sibling who is welcomed into your own world.

you ask her if she wants to hang out with you and steph in your own personal sleepover inside your room and she accepts it because of just how comforting your presence is. it's been so long since she had last felt like she was treated as a human and you were proof that she's glad she never took the path to human carnage like her father intended her to because then she wouldn't meet someone who would soon be so precious to her.

cass may not talk a lot but she is a listener.

a listener to both your words and your body language. it's quicker for her to notice if you ever needed a hug or a catalyst for comfort. she knows your boundaries and when you need space the most. she knows it when you want to open up to her about how stuffy the manor is beginning to feel, how it feels as if they're becoming more sensitive about your social life, how you wish your friends aren't distancing themselves from you because of how intimidating your family is.

and you can say all that to her because cass, alongside duke and sometimes steph, would be the only ones keeping your deepest darkest desires to their grave. although she may not understand your reasonings on why you even felt like your family is coddling you too much (because they're not! they love you very much and she does too) in the first place, she's always the one offering you to hold her hands whenever you're going through a momentary panic attack or a shoulder to lean on whenever dick would scold you for something impulsive you've done.

unlike your neglected counterpart, cass would always be by your shadows, watching every one of your moves and to abide by bruce's order to make sure you wouldn't escape, shall you ever feel rebellious during your teenage years. you may be older than her but she's stronger than you, more experienced and can even combat your dad if she wants to.

yet she always seems to let her guard down when it comes to you because you just seem to have that alluring effect on everybody. can't you understand just how important you are to everybody? you're the most important to her, you're one of the first few people who had treated her like a human so she swears on her life to protect you from harm's way like you did her whenever she's often in a pit of despair.

cass isn't the most expressive, so she makes up for it by instead leaving signs that she really cares for you, or sometimes hiding little trinkets for you to find in your room. it's like her very own message that translates 'cass was here'.

whenever you sit beside her at the dinner table, she always slips in extra food by your plate without you looking or sometimes even filling your glass bottles with extra juice and you'll never know why until you realize that it's her way of telling you to eat more. sometimes, your clothes would go missing until you see your sisters wearing your own collection of jackets and hoodies then swapping them in your drawers for their own— you'd realize that cass got that idea from steph and you can't get mad at her or anybody else as it soon becomes tradition that you'll have an entire closet dedicating to the missing clothes you have that your siblings have replaced to their own attire.

cass really does love you and although she can't always say it out loud, you'll always have a constant reminder instead. as long as you're safe and sound then you don't have to witness the darker sides of her that she hides from you.

then finally, duke thomas. he may have been introduced to you the latest but you could say in terms of every trait, he'd be the brother you'd like to keep close for every situation. your first meeting with him is quite frankly the most normal one of them all, introducing yourself to duke through dinner. although he may be temporarily under bruce's guardianship over anything else, he's incredibly comforting to be around as he's quick to catch on your emotions but unlike the others, he doesn't push you to open up to him, but he won't leave your side at all either.

duke is the only metahuman you're probably allowed to be close with because your dad absolutely refuses you from even trying to talk with the superfamily. and duke heavily prides himself with that information, often secretly showing you his metahuman skills and answering whatever questions you have about them.

like jason, duke wouldn't fully delude himself into thinking you're innocent, that you need to be babied to the point they feel the urge to track even the food you eat— so he's your reliable source for any video games you were forbidden to play or any movies dick would consider too gruesome for you. he's chill, he even sneaks you unhealthy chips once in a while which makes him automatically one of the top in your tier list.

but don't think he's entirely on your side, because whilst duke seems the most normal to you - the only sibling who wouldn't smother you in blankets the moment you accidentally cut yourself with a kitchen knife - he's also batshit crazy for his own sibling and he'll sacrifice a lot for you two. so if you even dare try to suggest an idea that duke knows would risk not only him, but especially you, then that idea automatically is relayed to your dad and you wouldn't really want your father's gentle scolding anymore.

you can try to find a loophole to go out with him though! if you want to eat batburgers outside then you can do so when he's at his patrol, seeing as how he's the only batkid who does daytime patrol and that's way safer than eating at night, no?

so do expect spending more time with him the most outside, other than with dick and damian, but you'll be forced to sit in the sidelines where nobody can lay their hands on you whilst duke would be busy fighting crime and afterwards treating you to ice cream like he didn't just 'accidentally' and brutally body slammed a criminal into the wall for giving you heart eyes.

'most normal member of the family, my ass' would be the first thing that pops into your mind, but hey! at least you didn't have to be always locked up into the stuffy manor, right...?

at least you get to spend time with all of your siblings and a very loving and attentive father..!

little did you know that the only reason they allowed you out is to give you this false sense of independence, slowly but surely planning for the ultimate day where they truly would lock you up away from the world.

but they just can't help it, you know? the media's greedy hands are starting to take more than they could; so many eyes are on you and danger awaits at every corner in gotham— they can't afford having their beloved being pried away from their arms.

so is it truly a blessing or a curse in disguise? you don't know anymore.

[writingroom21]

The Nanny

Pairing: Rafe x Nanny Reader

Summary: Being Wheezie's nanny was great. The only downside was dealing with the oldest Cameron, Rafe. What happens when his fascination with the nanny becomes a reality?

Warnings: Fluff, 18+, unprotected sex (wrap it up y'all), cream pie, mention of oral, fingering (f receiving), mentions of drugs

Wc:8.2K

A/N: Sorry for the long wait it has been a hectic week. I had a lot to do for this job I applied for so I was busy. But good news is that I got it! Anyway last chapter which is sad, but I hope you enjoy. Thank you for all the love this series has gotten. I owe it all to everyone of you!

Chapter 9: Laying All Our Cards Down

There’s a tickling feeling on your chest. It slowly stirs you from your sleep. The objects in you dream fading into shapes, then blobs of random color. Your hand goes to relieve the itch, still half asleep. Your fingers brush against a hand, their fingers the cause of what woke you. 

Rafe’s eyes watched you as you woke up, his fingers dropping the pendant to lace together with yours. Your eyes squint open slightly foggy from sleep still. They clear and Rafe is staring at you, his fingers playing with yours. “You put the necklace back on.” He points out, fine lines wrap his eyes showing his confusion. 

“Yeah.” You carefully look at his face, waiting to see if he will mention last night. “Why?” His blue eyes are burrowing into yours, forcing you to look at him. “You know why.” You won’t be the first to bring it up. Refusing to let him back you into a corner to crack you. His nostrils flare, a sharp breath leaving. “I don’t deserve you. It would never work anyway.”

There he is doing it again. Taking back the things he says, leaving you broken. “Well that’s not for you to decide.” Your voice is tense, starting to get upset at where he’s about to go. “How are you feeling?” He’s trying to ignore this conversation. Once you have it there’s no going back.

He can’t sit here and wait for you to leave him. You may be forgiving him now but in the end you will leave him. His mom died to get away from him, his dad would sell him out in a heart beat to get away from him, no one stays. That’s the one thing he learned growing up. The only constant in his life will only be him.

“Don’t ignore me.” You exclaim, your body shooting up to look down at him. “We are having this conversation now. I just want this to be over with.” Your eyes burn him so badly that he has to look behind you at the wall. “I’m not. Just worried about how you feel after what happened.” Liar. You both know he’s not telling the truth

 “Please don’t tell me that you really don’t want anything to do with me. This means something to me.” Your voice is hopeful, wanting him to say he feels the same as you. “Last night was scary until it wasn’t. That’s because I had you. Now please talk to me.” You plead.

Rafe turns his gaze back to you. His red eyes are lined with tears, he knows what he needs to say. It’s just hard for the words to form and make their way out. “This means something to me too.” It’s a whisper, afraid if he says it loudly he’ll wake up from this dream to reality. To a place where you won’t forgive him, a place where he doesn’t have you. “I’m scared you are going to leave me.” He admits, swallowing his pride.

“Why would you think that? Is that how you view me?” Your mind is trying to wrap around his confession. If that’s what he thought of you then you are hurt even more. You could slightly stand the thought of him just not wanting you anymore. The thought of him not trusting you, thinking that you would just leave hurts worse than when you caught him kissing someone else. A panic rises in your body due to your emotions.

Rafe picks up on this, his hand rubbing the arm that is holding you up. Giving you comfort as he speaks. “That’s not what I mean. I just…” He flops on his back to stare at the ceiling. You place a hand on his chest. Returning the sense of safety he gives you. “Everyone leaves me. You know how sad it is that the only person to actually worry about me since my mom died was you? Before her death my dad hated me and it only got worse after. No one has ever liked me and I was okay with that. Then you show up and change everything. I can’t lose that, I won’t be able to handle it.”

You watch each other, letting the words sink in. He’s shocked he even indulged in that conversation, you are just as shocked that he opened up. “So why would that mean I would leave you?” His hand lays on top of the one you kept on his chest. Giving your fingers a squeeze. “It’s inevitable, everyone leaves. Only a matter of time before you realize I’m worth nothing and you leave too. I’m just cursed.” His fingers have a tight hold on you. Using you as his life line, tethering him to the real world as he feels like he’s drowning.

This talk is starting to feel too real for him. Highlighting all of his flaws to put on a talent show for you. A bright spot light shining on a RUN sign to ward you off. You can feel how fast his heart is beating, pounding against his chest. “You are worth something.” Your hand leaves his, cupping his cheek to make him see you. “You Rafe Cameron are worthy of love. I’m sorry no one was smart enough to see it. But I do.” 

Rafe leans up, closing in on you. “You don’t know half of the shit that goes on in my head. I’m not good enough for you. I couldn’t even get this shit right, I’ll only hurt you more.” His hand brushes hair out of your face, tracing your brow and then your lips. “I won’t hurt you. You deserve better than this.”

A tear runs down his cheek and you wipe it. “See that right there just proves you won’t hurt me. I didn’t want to see it at first but you owned your mistake. You ran after me that night and begged me to talk to you. You kept asking me to give you a chance to speak. Then you gave me those flowers with the note and I realized I was shutting you out. I was afraid of you not wanting me and I iced you out.” You take a deep breath before continuing.

“I’m scared too. It’s okay to be scared, we both let it get the best of us. What counts is what we do after. You kept trying, I hope it’s because you care-” “I do. I care.” He interrupts. “See you care and you tried to put in the effort. You even gave me space because you wanted to respect what I wanted. You made a mistake but you are trying to fix it. You might not see it but you are good. You deserve to be loved, don’t punish yourself for something that isn’t your fault.”

His lips crash on yours, stealing the air from your lungs. The kiss is all consuming, devouring you from the inside out. A moan slips out of your mouth, your hand gripping his shoulder. The sound was like an alarm, alerting him of what he was actually doing. He pulls away from you, his hand moving to your chest to put distance between you both. “I’m sorry I shouldn’t have done that.” 

“Stop taking everything back. I want this too, stop running away from us.” There’s some commotion in the hallway but you ignore it. Voices get louder for a second and then fade as they go down the stairs. His eyes catch the pendant on the dainty chain held on your neck. 

He remembers the day he bought it. He had just dropped you off to get the food and stopped at the store. Rafe was walking back to his truck with the bags in his and had to pass the jewelry store. When he got to the front of the shop he looked over and something in him took over. He just had to go inside.

As he walked in, the man behind the counter greeted him. “Are you looking for something specific?” The older man asks. Rafe just shakes his head. “Just looking.” He walks around the store, aimlessly looking at the pieces laying around. He’s not really sure why he came in or why he is even looking at anything. Just when he was going to turn around and leave the store, that's when he saw it.

A dainty necklace that had a sun charm on it. He walks closer to it on instinct, being drawn to it like a beacon. It’s silver, which fits perfectly with the rest of your jewelry, he thinks. The only things you wear is silver, never any gold seen on your skin. “Nice necklace right?” The old man pipes in.

“Huh?” Rafe looks at the guy who is now in front of him. “The necklace. Just got it recently, no one seems to want it.” Rafe looks back down to it. “There a girl you want to get it for.” He just nods, pulling out his wallet without thinking. “Yeah my girl. She uh, she’s like the sun. Thought it would be fitting.”

The man opens the case, taking the piece out for Rafe to see up close. “She must be special then.” Rafe just smiles, looking at the guy as he slides his card over. “You have no idea.” The guy doesn’t move from his spot, looking at the boy that reminded him of when he was younger. “You know it comes with a ring. It was a set this old lady brought in.” He walks over to a different case and pulls the ring out, walking back to the boy. 

“Would you be interested in buying that as well or just the necklace.” Rafe has half a mind to chew the man out for trying to up-sell him. The ring is a band made of silver as well, carvings of a little sun with stars surround the band. His mind is telling him he has no need for the ring. Then the voice in his head stops him, instead of degrading himself it does something different. It reminds him of the car ride, the feeling he had as he looked at you.

He meant it when he said that you were like the sun. A dazzling ray of sunshine personally made for him. You are the greatest thing that’s happened to him in his shitty lifetime. You deserve to feel special too.

“I’ll take them both.” He knows why he got the ring. A part of him deep down knowing that he was falling in love with you. The other part rationalizing the purchase as wanting the old man to fuck off. “You remind me of when I met my wife.” Rafe stops at the door and looks back at the guy who helped him. “I was so in love with her that I bought her an engagement ring a month into seeing her. You just have the same look that I had. I wish you two the best of luck.”

The memory now seems laughable to him. Some random old man could spot how Rafe felt before he could even tell. He only gave you the necklace because he was scared of what he said, he couldn’t have been in love. Leaving the ring in the first drawer on the bedside table. Now he sees just how dumb he really was, he didn’t have anything to worry about. 

“Your love.” That’s all he says to you, leaving you more confused. “What about it?” He chuckles at you, giving you a quick peck. “That’s my favorite song, Your love. I didn’t have one when you asked but I have one now.” This really isn’t helping his case. You sit up fully, looking at him like he’s dumb. He hates that look, especially coming from you. “What the hell does that have to do with any of this? Rafe I’m being serious here, you can’t just keep changing the subject. If you don’t want this anymore just say it.” You kinda feel stupid now. You thought he wanted to work things out, that last night was a step forward in the right direction. But clearly not.

“It’s the song that was playing in the car after Barry’s.” Okay now he’s just getting on your nerves. Who cares what song was playing in the car ride. When you go to speak he puts his hand on your mouth to cover it. “I just couldn’t stop looking at you. You were glowing, so pretty that I couldn’t think straight. My heart felt like it was ready to jump out my chest and my body felt weird. Everything shifted in that moment for me.” His hand lowers, his eyes telling you to not say anything.

“I’ve always had feelings for you, I know that. I’m not dumb. I just thought it was because you didn’t give me the time of day and were so nice. That night when you caught me I figured you would walk away and I got caught up in the moment. Then it escalated and I couldn’t get rid of the taste of you. Every touch was as addicting as the last, I kept craving it. That song, in that moment made me realize how much I actually liked you. Got that necklace right after I left you to get the food. I guess it was my way of telling you I loved you without putting it into words.” 

He said it again, love. Rafe froze the moment his brain caught up to his words. He can’t believe this is how he is saying it. Right after he just figured it out he goes on blurting it to you. Not only that he tells you when you aren’t even together. This is honestly the dumbest he felt and he just said how he isn’t dumb. Good job Rafe.

“Fuck I can’t believe I just said that. Ignore me.” His hands rub his face as he freaks out. Your fingers wrap around his wrist, exposing his face to you. “You said it last night so don’t worry.” You lay down, your chest pressed against his side as he wraps himself around you. “What do you mean?” He plays with the ends of your hair to ground himself. “Last night as you were falling asleep you said you loved me. I just thought it was the drugs and you were out cold after you said it.”

“Oh.” Yeah he has to take his dumb statement back, he definitely is. If he’s already said it then there’s no taking it back, he’s got to commit to it before he chickens out again. “It wasn’t the drugs. Yeah they helped me say it but I meant it. They didn’t make those feelings, they were already there.” You smile, the heaviness you felt being melted away. You move closer to his face.

“Here’s what you missed after you fell asleep. I love you too.” It’s his turn to smile. This one reaches his eyes, creases deepening from the joy. His hand cups your cheeks, thumb caressing your cheek. Pulling you to him, kissing you deeply. Pouring all his feelings into you, hoping you are feeling just an ounce of what he does. He pulls back to talk to you but you have other plans. 

Your lips trail down his neck as he fights to stay level headed. “I meant it when I said I don’t deserve you.” He murmurs into your shoulder, pressing kisses to your skin. You stop, not wanting to move in case this is going in the wrong direction. “But I want to be. I don’t want to be this person anymore. I want to be someone you deserve.”

“I like you the way you are. You don’t have to change for me.” He tugs your hair, coming face to face with your eyes. “I want to do it for me, for us. I don’t like who I am without you, I’m just some addict no one likes. I don’t need to be that anymore, I know I can be different.”

The words seem more for him than they are for you. A way of telling himself that he can get clean and he is worth being with you. “Then I’ll be there every step of the way. I believe in you.” That’s the first time someone has said that to him. He’s been told he was loved before, but not one has believed in him. Now that he’s said he loved you, the feeling keeps bubbling up. 

Like it’s boiling in him ready to spill out once it gets too much. The way you care for him is unsettling due to it being so new, he’s not used to this. But he can get used to the feeling it gives him. The sparks of joy lighting his insides like fireworks.

You lean in and kiss him again, enjoying the feeling of having him close. The days following the incident were awful but they seem worth it now. Some obstacle that needed to be overcome before the two of you could open up. You know for sure that once Ward and Rose got back you would have most likely ended things due to the fear. But losing each other showed you that it’s not what the two of you wanted. You wanted each other.

This kiss was getting heated, your leg bracketing his hips between yours. As you start to grind on him, he stops you. “We should stop.” There’s a knock at the door before you could ask him why. “Who is it?” He shouts towards the door, fingers digging into your flesh as you roll your hips. “It’s Wheeze. Where is she?” You both look at each other not knowing what to do. “She’s not in her room or the house and I know she’s in there.”

Of course she would check everywhere for you. “Go back to your room Wheeze or wherever. I’ll be out shortly.” You answer, trying to get her to leave . “Fine but I better not hear any moaning. Just because I’m okay with this doesn’t mean I want to see it.”

Her footsteps retreat as you giggle. “I want us to take things slow this time. I don’t want to rush in and fuck things up. We should do this properly.” Your fingers drag along his chest, you are still sitting in his lap. “We can do that. Where do we start?” He grins up at you.

“How about a date?”

✶✶✶✶✶✶✶✶✶✶✶✶✶ 

After that morning you had a talk with Wheezie. You and Sarah sat her down to tell her that the night before was not okay. “Wheeze you could have gotten hurt. Someone could have spiked your drink or worse.” You try to reason with her, conveying your worry for the young girl. “I know but nothing happened. I’m fine.” “And if you weren’t? How do you think dad would have reacted if he found out? You would be grounded and out a nanny.” Sarah chimes in, not really making her sister feel any better. “I know you wanted to hang out with your friends but you need to do it safely. Where were they when Sarah found you? You were alone and drunk Wheeze.”

“It wasn’t supposed to go like that. Sure I had a drink or two but I just wanted you to come find me. I thought you would run into Rafe and everything would fix itself. But hey look it worked.” She’s trying to lighten the mood and it ain’t working. You sigh, not knowing what to say. This mess of a night happened all because Wheezie parent trapped you. 

You honestly can’t help but to laugh at the ridiculous thought. “You parent trapped us? Wheeze that’s sweet you cared enough to help us, it really is. But maybe don’t do things that put you in harm's way and give me a heart attack. I was scared when Sarah couldn’t find you and you wouldn’t answer phone calls.” Thinking back at it now she can see how messed up a plan that really is. “It was stupid. I’m sorry for scaring you.”

The rest of the day was simple. Relax around the house as Wheeze was feeling the aftershocks of drinking. Rafe had chilled with you for a little before running off to do lord knows what. But when he got back it was with a single yellow rose and your favorite chocolates. “Thought you could add it to break up the white.” He makes it seem so effortless, as if he has always done this. You don’t understand why he was so worried.

“How about a date on Saturday?” He asks, picking a chocolate to eat. “Sure what are we going to do?” There’s chocolate smeared on his teeth when he answers. “That’s for me to worry about and for you to find out. Now I’m going to go up stairs and shower. Come up and we can watch Bob Burgers or something.” He finishes off with giving you a kiss, walking out like nothing.

You watch as he leaves, a smile displayed. He remembers the small things about you. The foods you like, shows you watch, he sees you. He may not realize it yet but you do deserve him. He can do all of this without you asking, you are used to having to beg for things you want.

Needed new stuff for school beg your parents. When they say no, beg your job for more pay for just that week. First boyfriend, beg him to even notice you when it didn’t come to sex. You had to beg friends to stay in your life even after they hurt you. The last person to care about you in this way has been gone for years. Now a memory you play back to make yourself feel loved. But here he is, the playboy of Kildare, giving you that same love. 

As you make your way to his room you promise yourself one thing. You won’t give up on him, he deserves happiness just as much as you do.

The rest of the week goes similar to that day. You and Rafe would sneak off to spend time with each other. Sharing secret kisses away from prying eyes. Rafe knows that Ward is suspicious, he had made a comment at lunch the other day. “The two of you seem close again.” He stared blankly at his dad. “Just be safe.” It felt like some validation was thrown his way. It’s not like he was trying to hide you but sneaking around made it more fun.

Everyone already knew that whatever happened was water under the bridge, but it seems like you two didn’t get the notice. 

You giggle as Rafe kisses your neck, teasing your bikini straps with his fingers. “Rafe, come one we have to get back. People will start to look for us.” Your words do nothing to stop him. “Let me enjoy my girl. Screw everyone else.” His kisses travel up to your jaw. “Well really can’t screw them if you keep me here.” Rafe knows you are teasing but it rubs him the wrong way.

“You do realize that you’re mine right? Ain’t no way in hell someone else is touching you.” The possessiveness isn’t new but heightened. Since your talk they thought of the other with someone new terrorizes your minds. It’s a new feeling for you, wanting someone to be yours always. To feel a strong sense of anger when thinking of him with someone else. Your arms wrap around his neck, bringing him into a kiss. “I do. As long as you know your mine too.”

“Only yours, baby.” He mumbles on your lips, teeth biting on the lower one to suck in his mouth. “We can go back out now. You go first gotta take care of something.” He nods down to the obvious boner in his pants.  “You know I can help you with that.” You say seductively, fingers brushing against the bulge in his swim trunks. “Let’s wait till after our date tonight, please. Trying to be a gentleman here and treat you right. Plus I don’t put out on the first date.” 

You laugh as you walk away from him.  “No, you just sleep with them before you even ask them out.” You mock him. Leaving Rafe alone to fix his little, well not so little, situation. You grab water from the kitchen before walking back out to the pool. Everyone is there chatting to one another.

A part of the “new” Rafe plan was rebonding with his sisters. Sarah of course was a little wary of the plan but saw how much he actually meant it. She was brought back to when she was little and he would sneak into her room to check for monsters. The little boy who gave her so much comfort was staring at her when he apologized, owning his mistakes and wanting to correct them. Even if she wanted to say no she couldn’t. Even with all of his wrongs he's still her brother and it seems like she’s getting him back.

Wheezie on the other hand was on board once the place was told to her. Being the youngest she doesn’t have many memories with the Rafe before their mom died. The one that was happy and not as broken. She can recall some moments where he cared deeply for her at a young age, barely even an image to see. She never really had issues with him after their mom’s death. Her and Rafe become the background as Sarah was the main event. They connected in a way that they could only understand. She was just happy that Rafe wasn’t as angry as he was before. 

The downside to this plan also meant a new beginning with the pogues, which was hard to do. It took a whole day of you and Sarag convincing everyone that it could work. Which brings you to this right here, pool day. Which is also the same day as your first date. The pogues as well as Topper and Kelce are here. Everyone agreed to be civil for the day, wanting to give Rafe this chance. You don’t know why the pogues said yes but you can’t complain, only happy that they are willing to see the good side of him after all the bad.

It’s been hours of you all getting to know each other. Playing silly games such as never have I ever. It wasn’t till the clock hit four that Rafe realized he hadn’t gotten a moment with you alone. That’s when he dragged you away when no one was looking. That was almost an hour ago, the shame of it all is eating you. Cheeks blushing red as everyone’s eye’s turn to look at you.

They just carry on with conversation, not mentioning what they all knew. You're relieved as you sit down, even more when Rafe sits besides you. His arms wrapping around your shoulder so you are leaning into him. Looking around makes you happy. Rafe has been great all day, no pogue comments or rude remarks. Your friends seem to be having a good time, joking around as if this was a normal day.

The feeling continues as you get ready for your date. Your jams in the shower only improve your mood as you shave. Extending as you pick out your dress, smile so wide your cheeks hurt. You are putting on earrings when there’s a knock on your door. “Come in.” You look in the mirror to see if there are any finishing touches needed. “Wow.” It sounds more like a breath than words. 

“You look beautiful. Maybe we should stay home instead, don’t need people seeing you like this.” He walks in the room, flowers abandoned on your dresser. “Actually nevermind, I want people to see that my girl is taken.” His hands land on your waist, arms hugging you from behind. “Your girl?Taken?” He loves when you tease him. That shit normally pisses him off, yet with you he can’t help but love it. “Yeah my girl. Always been my Sunny.”

He really hasn’t used the nickname much since you told him not to. You miss when he did. Your name doesn’t feel right coming from his lips. It sounds outrageous but it feels wrong. Even the other nicknames he gave you don’t feel the same. “I miss hearing you say that.” You lean further back to look up at him. “Calling you Sunny?” You hmm in reply. He pecks your lips, then nose, cheek, and finally ear. “I miss saying it. Glad to have my Sunny back.”

He twirls you around in his arms. Breaking away only for the two of you to leave the house. The car ride to the mysterious destination seemed to take forever, every turn just adding to the allotted time. As he drives the beach comes to view, waves crashing against the shore. The truck pulls onto a sandy road in between some trees, leading to an isolated part of the beach.

“Found this spot a couple years back. I usually come here when I want to be alone, but I thought it would be perfect for tonight.” The hand on your thigh tightens and releases the flesh. More of a way to ground himself to say that this was real, not a dream. “Why? Want to murder me where no one can see?” Your joke swayed his nerves. The nervous smile replaced with the one you’ve grown to love. “Haha, very funny. If I was going to kill you I would have done it that day on the Druthers.”

You give him a death stare, his dead tone making it seem like he thought of this before. “What? The sea would get rid of all evidence, nice and simple.” He shrugs, putting the truck in park. “Yeah I don’t like that you’ve thought of this before. Maybe I should have shared my location while I had the chance.” He chuckles, pulling you into a kiss. “Too late.” He retorts, getting out the truck to grab the last minute things from the back.

He had set things up the night before. You and Wheezie were having a movie night and he took the time to set up the place. There were fairy lights wrapped around the bare trees, the trunks illuminated by the light. A bouquet of hydrangeas, your second favorite flowers, were in a vase by two trees. It wasn’t a big space, the truck was parked on the road so it didn’t interfere with the layout. It was the perfect amount of space to be on the sand without getting splashed by the waves.

Rafe takes a few blankets out and walks over to where the vase is. You follow picking them up to set out of the way. “Those are for you. Wanted to get you something different than roses to change things up.” He explains as he lays the blankets down. “Thank you, I love them. They are actually my second favorite.” He gives you this little smirk and a wink. “I know.” Then he’s off getting the last item from the truck bed.

How much does he know about you? It’s like he has this book where he writes everything down so he won’t forget. None the less you like how he remembers the small things. It makes you feel important to him. 

You look to see him walking over to you with a basket. Raising it up, he shows the basket off to you. The other hand was holding a bottle of champagne and two glasses. “You didn’t have to do all of this. We could have just stayed in or got food.” He sits down next to you, placing everything on the blankets. “I wanted to do this. Saw somewhere that your actions speak louder or some shit like that.” Even when he pretends not to care he does 

“You’re really good at this.” Rafe watches you from the side of his eye as he takes out the snacks he packed. “What are you talking about?” He moves the basket once everything is laid out, reaching for a strawberry to take a bite. He brings the strawberry to your lips.You take  nibble, the sweetness of the fruit sitting on your tongue. “The whole relationship thing.” You swallow what you had in your mouth. Rafes eyes watch as your tongue chases and remnites on your lips.

“It’s just you care. You get me my favorite flowers, snacks, it makes me feel special.” “You are special.” You smile at him. “So are you. I just need you to know that I appreciate the effort you are putting in. Especially today with the pogues, it meant a lot to me.” He’s leaning on his side as he listens to your words. Soaking in the praise, relishing in the feeling it gives him. “I meant it when I said I want to change. I know they're important to you, so that makes them important to me. Plus they aren’t that bad, I guess.”

The rest of the night was filled with small talk. Taking the time to know each other better. It was easy to get in the rhythm of sharing information, knowing the other can’t judge. He tells you about every negative thing his dad has done. How he feels useless in his life, that he doesn’t know who to be if it’s not done with anger. In return, you tell him about what it was like living with your parents. The constant pressure to be perfect and bring them money. How after your grandmother died every sense of a normal childhood was taken from you. 

Rafe listens as you divulge your inner demons. Wanting to go to your house to yell at how stupid your parents are. How they should be ashamed of treating you like some cash cow. He realizes you two aren’t so different. Both had different experiences but still the same outcome. A home that never loved you. “Have they talked to you sin-” “No. They refuse to answer all of my texts.”

You are both laying on your backs, heads turned to the other. His hand closest to you grabs yours. Pulling it to his mouth he gives it a peck,resting it back down again. “Then you don’t need them. You have me and I have you. Plus my family loves you so the family part is covered. You’ll always have us.” You tear up, emotions bubbling up in you. “You can’t promise that.”

Rafe scoots closer, hugging you to his chest. “Yes I can.” It was a promise. A way of letting you know this is the long haul for him. He’s always known that you were different by the way you were with everyone. Always been drawn to you in some way, something in him not able to get enough of you. He realized that he can’t be without you during the time you ignored him. He’ll be damned if he has to go a lifetime without your love.

You start to kiss his neck, softly biting the skin with your teeth. “It’s our first date.” Your words are mumbled. “Good observation there babe.” His eyes shut, the sensation of your lips on his skin sending shivers down his spine. “You said after our date.” You remind him. His chuckle causes vibrations on your lips.

“Couldn’t even wait till we got home, just have to have me now. Hmm?” He pulls you over him, your hips slotted with his. Using your hips, he drags you back and forth over his dick. Your clit keeps catching the seam of his pants. “Such a little slut for my dick that you want to fuck me out in the open. Fucking me in the car wasn’t enough?” You moan out. No it wasn’t enough. None of him will ever be enough for you, entranced by the mere thought of him. “Never enough.” You moan again as he leans up, his lips meeting the exposed flesh on your chest. Leaving marks over your chest so he can enjoy the look of them later. “Get up.”

Your hands fly to his shoulders pushing him back. “What?” You stare down at him, trying to see if you crossed a line somehow. “We’re doing it right this time around. The first time we have sex again isn’t going to be on a deserted part of the beach. It’s going to be in my bed or yours. I really don’t care which one.” You huff at him, your breath causing some hairs to fly around. “Well maybe I don’t care about that. Maybe I want you here, right now.” 

Rafe is about to give in, only really wanting to make you happy. Willing to let go of the plan he had of showering you properly for your first date. Then you see the look in his eyes, sort of disappointed his plans are being skewed. “Okay, okay.” You say as you get up and reach a hand out. “You better drive fast or we might have to settle for the car again.”

You meant it when he said he needs to be fast. You were down the street when your hands were gripping him through his shorts. Lips peppering kisses along his neck. Rafe was relieved when he put his truck in park. Throwing to doors open and tossing you over his shoulder as he walks into the house. “Put me down silly.” He ignores you and makes his way up the stairs to his room.

You’re grateful that everyone in the house isn’t up. It’s close to twelve so most likely they are all sleeping. Rafe kicks his door open and then shut once you are in. You let out a squeal when he discards you on his bed. “Take your dress off now.” He commands, taking his shirt and shoes off. “Yes sir.”

Taking the dress off you are left in your white lingerie on display. He lets out a whistle, placing himself on top of you on the bed. “A perfect little angel.” He kisses up your stomach, stopping at your breasts to suck on them through the cups. “If only god knew what a whore you really are.” He bites one of your nipples, a shocked yelp forcing its way out of your throat. 

“Shhh. We have to be quiet, don’t want to wake them up.” Now that he thinks of it, he should have said yes when you wanted to stay on the beach. At least he would be able to hear the way you moan for him better. He pulls the cups down, nipples pebbling due to the air. 

Your hands work his pants and boxers down, leaving him naked. Next thing to go were your panties. Really they were only pushed off to the side so his fingers can touch you. You’re soaked, his fingers coated in your juices. He swirls them around, teasing your clit before pushing a finger in. A little impatient he adds another, staring as your mouth hangs open.

“There you go, beautiful. Such a good girl.” You haven’t been touched like this since that day on the Druthers. At first you were too heartbroken to do anything. Then too caught up with making up to even think about masturbating. It’s been a while and you are so wound up you could explode. With one last pump of his fingers you do, squelching noises filling the room.

“Rafe. Oh fuck, right there.” You had no time to recover when he was pushing himself in. He couldn’t wait anymore, his dick was aching to be inside you. This is probably the worst time to be so riled up. He’s been trying to make things better with you that he neglected himself. He couldn’t even think about touching himself this whole time. But now that he’s here, feeling your walls clamp around him he knows he fucked up. 

“Fuck… oh fuck.” He encases your body, his forehead on your shoulder. His arms wrap you, bringing your body closer to his as he nails dig into your back. You match his actions, nails dragging on his back, welts rising as you go. His lips can’t stay off of you, kissing any part of you he can get. Your mind is fixated on the feeling of his hips meeting yours.

Rafe’s perfectly huge dick piercing you g-spot over and over again. The two of you are just a mess of words. None of them are even audible yet you still understand the other. “God Sunny.” His fingers get deeper in your flesh, pain increasing your pleasure. “I’m not going to last long.”

Your left hand holds Rafe’s head. “Please.” His hips pick up pace, hurdling the two of you to your ends. You try to switch your positions, wanting to send him over the edge faster. “No no. Want to see your face. Need to see my pretty girl.” His moans are mixing with yours. The only thing that can be heard in the room is skin hitting skiing and your moans. “It’s okay baby. Fill me.” That was the end of him. He moans loudly as he fills you, his release triggering yours. Slowly rocking his hips to watch you awe stocks face for longer.

Rafe lays motionless on you, the orgasim of his life taking everything out of him. Your arms hold him to you, not wanting to let him go. “Shit that was amazing.” His words tickle you, air following them as they leave to dance on your skin. “Tell me about it.”

✶✶✶✶✶✶✶✶✶✶✶✶✶

It’s been a month since your first date. When Rafe said slow he sure was not kidding. You would fool around when you can but really haven’t had the chance to fully sleep together. Every time you try he finds a reason why you shouldn’t. The furthest you got was when you gave him a blowjob and he ate you out. It’s been a whole month of tiptoeing around to not get caught.

Everyone knows now that you two are practically together. Ward is thankful that the issue is over and you have passed it. He can see Rafe changing, no more fights around the island. But more importantly no more drugs. Rafe quit after you gave him another chance, not fully at first but he got there. Ward was surprised not taking it seriously at first, as time went on he couldn’t deny it. Rafe actually was doing good for the first time in years.

The relationship between Rafe and his sisters had also improved. They spend time together without you now, not for long but they no longer argue. He even hung out with John B, JJ, and Pope alone. Everyone was shocked to see the boys all in one piece. You could say the only issue right now is once again what you and Rafe are.

You know you are exclusive. He had made that clear the night after your date. Saying how he won’t let anyone else get in the way. There was never a conversation about if you are boyfriend and girlfriend. No confirmation that you were fully together. It’s been eating away at you but you want to respect him taking things slow. Which was all fine until the party that happened tonight. 

Rafe was still selling with Barry even though he decided to spot doing drugs. He was going to the party to help push some coke and pills to all of the kooks. Instead of leaving you at home he asked you to go with. “Just come along. We can sit on some couch the whole night.” In truth he just didn’t want to be in a party setting alone. It’s one thing to stay away from drugs when he’s at home, at a party it’s different. 

If he was there by himself he would fall back into temptation. He can still feel the need to get high at times, missing the way it made him numb. Sometimes being sober is too much for him, having to take a few hits of a joint to calm the nerves. Weed and alcohol are the only things he allows himself, since he knows he can control those urges. He needs you there for moral support.

The party was in full swing when you reached the house. Rafe pushes through the house, hand in yours to guide you. He found a couch in the back easily and set up shop. Kook would come by asking for some coke, exchanging cash for a little baggy. Some would sit on the chairs next to the couch and take bumps right there. Others just take their goods and leave. 

Two hours into the party Rafe goes off to the bathroom leaving you alone. The only instructions he gave was to tell anyone who wants to buy to come back later. Which wasn’t a problem, then some guy walked up. “How much for a baggy?”

You look up from your phone to see your ex from highschool. “Ben?” He smiles at you. “Long time no see. Didn’t know that you started selling drugs.” He sits down next to you, leaving arms length of space. “No my… uh no I don’t sell.” You don’t know what to call Rafe. You wanted to say boyfriend but you aren’t really sure.

“Hey.” Rafe’s voice snaps you out of your thoughts. You smile at him but see that he isn’t looking at you. His eyes are trained on Ben. “Hey man. Looks like we got to wait, apparently this saint doesn’t sell.” Ben’s comment pisses Rafe off. “Well I hope not. She would take me out of business.” He’s trying to keep his cool, not wanting to lose his temper after working hard on it.

“Wait, you're the one selling?” Ben asks, he went off to college in a different state so he hasn’t been around much. He doesn't know a lot about Rafe after highschool or you for that matter. Rafe nods at the guy, tossing him a baggy and telling him the price. Ben says your name. “Do you know this guy?” You can’t get the words out since Rafe is answering for you. “Yeah she does. I’m her boyfriend.” 

You look at Rafe, eyes expressing how you feel. When you get happy there’s these golden specks that get brighter. He doesn’t even notice as he and Ben stare at each other. “Wow. Never expected this when we broke up.” The money he was handing over was snatched by Rafe. He wants to punch him in his stupid face. “Yeah well never thought you would cheat on me. I guess we just didn’t know each other.”

The anger Rafe is feeling intensifies. His eyes meet yours, as if you could read his emotions you shake your head. Instead of acting out he gathers the rest of the drugs laying out. Putting them away and grabbing your hand. “Come on baby. Let’s go home.” You try to protest. “Wait, don't you have to sell more?” “Nah go all I needed.” 

Rafe drags you out the house and into the truck. Driving to Tanny hill in silence. “Rafe?” He doesn’t say anything, only focusing on the road. His grip on the wheel is making his knuckles white. “Ray.” The new nickname surprises the two of you. He pulls into the drive-way and sits there. “Ray? That’s new.”

“I don’t know why I said it. Just you call me Sunny and a ray is associated with that. Thought it would be cute, but I don't know.” You feel a little self conscious now. “I like it.” He assures. The truck is silent after. You’re waiting for him to open up to you. “I got jealous.” There it is.

“I know.” He sighs. “You said you were my boyfriend.” He gives you this look. “Yeah no shit. I am.” He doesn’t get why that would be a problem. “You never asked.” Rafe looks at you before laughing. “Fuck I thought it was a given. Just assumed you knew I wanted you to be mine.” Now it’s your turn to laugh. “You’re such a dumbass. You need to ask a girl these things. I’ve been losing my mind over this.”

He gives you a kiss. “Will you be my girlfriend?” The words brush your lips. “Yeah I will.” You kiss him again. Not feeling his hand move around or his body shifting in a weird way. Pulling back something catches your eye. You glance down to see a ring. “What is that?” Rafe grabs your hand and puts the ring on your middle finger. “Got it the same day as the necklace. Was too scared to give it to you at first. This time around I won’t let it get to me. I promise I’m here for the long haul.”

The ring is beautiful, one of the nicest things you own now. Smiling at the boy in front of you, you realize how deep this really goes. Glad that you aren’t the only one who feels the same. “For the long haul.”

[ridox]

SYLUS ‘WHERE DRAKESHADOWS FALL’ THOUGHTS, THEORIES, TED TALKS —

I need to get these thoughts out of my head because his myth effectively made him my favorite LI and unfortunately there’s no going back from here anymore

Spoilers under the cut!

WHERE DO I EVEN BEGIN ?! I feel as though I need to just start word vomiting because this was the first time I’ve ever cried over any of the 5-star memories released in this game. 4-stars? Sure. There were a lot from Rafayel that I cried about but not to the extent Where Drakeshadows Fall made me.

BECAUSE YOU MEAN TO TELL ME THE REASON WHY SYLUS HAD SUCH A VISCERAL REACTION TO FINDING OUT MC CAN’T RESONATE WITH HIM ON THE MAIN CHAPTERS IS THE POSSIBILITY OF HER BEING DISGUSTED BY HIM ?!

ONLY TO HIT US WITH THE STORY OF HOW SYLUS FOUND HIMSELF SO MONSTROUS AS A CHILD THAT HE TRIED SHORING OFF HIS HORNS AND SCALES AND HOW NO MATTER HOW PAINFUL IT WAS IT DIDN’T COMPARE TO THE PAIN HE FELT FOR BEING OSTRACIZED AND PUNISHED FOR A SIN HE DIDN’T COMMIT ?! ?! ?!

Am I suppose to feel normal when the realization hit me that after the scene in the church, all the ‘good things’ that came afterward was just a dream? Another state of shared reality between Sylus & MC where they get to live a normal life, building a home out of the very church they both almost died on, decorating it to get a semblance of normalcy amidst society casting them out of its reaches and condemning them to a fate worse than death ?

You mean to tell me the field Sylus took MC on was nothing but a wish almost, to both of them, that after learning MC liked flowers after she spent an entire afternoon gathering enough to make a crown for him, Sylus immediately showed her the field of Datura and convinced her that beauty still exists in this dark cruel world and for him the equivalent of that is her ?!

LIKE I’M SUPPOSED TO JUST BE OKAY WITH THE THOUGHT THAT SYLUS SACRIFICED HIMSELF TO UPHOLD HIS END OF THE DEAL WHERE MC GETS TO LIVE YET SHE CURSED HIM TO NEVER SUFFER A TRUE DEATH LEST ITS BECAUSE OF HER OWN TWO HANDS

HOW THE RESONANCE CHAIN LINK ALL ALONG WAS BECAUSE HIS SOUL MERGED WITH HERS AND SHE CARRIES THE BOTH OF THEM INSIDE HER SOUL BONDED TILL THEY MEET AGAIN

No I don’t feel normal, my mind is going 100% an hour and this is the day after I read through his entire myth already

MIND YOU AFTER THIS MYTH I HAVE SEVERAL THEORIES NOW —

1. MC cursing Sylus to essentially live forever, in effect cursed herself to also basically become immortal. Except the curse is only halved on her part because only half of Sylus’ soul lives in her which is why she resurrects with no memory of who she was or what they were in their past lives

2. With that said, the only reason MC is able to get resurrected time and time again is because of this curse that she essentially put on herself. Which leads me to the second theory that perhaps a part of Sylus’ heart lives inside of MC. You know that huge gem on his chest that’s nowhere to be seen during present day ?

Highly theorizing that’s actually a protocore and perchance the same protocore inside MC’s heart

Source: I can feel it in my bones

3. Rafayel knows who Sylus is because Sylus plays a bigger role in the entire story than we thought. As far as we know, Sylus’ myth is the oldest in terms of Philos history. MC’s life may very well have started at this point (or well, until we find out who the other LI is and what role he plays in the story)

Anyway, there’s a couple of instances where Rafayel mentions dreaming of dragons, or having to best an evil dragon, something about towers which was very much so present in the Sylus myth blah blah yada yada

Rafayel knows who Sylus is but has never actually met him before

4. Finally, if MC dies then Sylus dies as well.

THAT’S ALL THANK YOU FOR COMING TO MY TED TALK

[makeitmingi]

The Cat and Dog Game [Chapter 2]

Genre: Romance, Fluff, Comedy

Pairing: Yunho x Reader (y/n)

Characters: Chef!Reader, RestaurantOwner!Yunho, MaitreD!Hongjoong, Waiter!Yeosang, Waiter!San, Waiter!Mingi, SousChef!Seonghwa, SousChef!Wooyoung, PrepChef!Jongho

Summary: Yunho's dream was to open and run his own restaurant. But he doesn't know anything when it comes to cooking. Until you came along and accepted the job, bringing with you a small crew. How will the black cat tame the energetic golden retriever?

Word count: 3.3K

"Nice to be acquainted with you. My name is Yunho... No, no. It's nice to meet you. Call me Yunho!... That's so awkward... Thank you for making the time. My name is Mr Jeong Yunho." Yunho planted a fake grin. He let out a groan as he processed his own words, falling onto his steering wheel.

*TAP TAP*

"Yunho... Are you okay?" Hongjoong stood outside, a questioning look on his face. Yunho sat up, blinking as he stared at the oldest of the group.

"Hey, hyung. I'm fine." Yunho said, getting out of the car. He grabbed his bag and coffee mug before locking the vehicle.

"Wow. You've... dressed up." Hongjoong scanned the outfit that Yunho had put on.

"I have to look like the owner of a restaurant right? I picked a colour that exudes confidence! Is it too much?" Yunho's eyes widened in fear as he paused in his tracks.

"You're fine, Yunho. Chill. You look nice. Don't worry." Hongjoong patted the taller on the shoulder. Yunho unlocked the door to the place.

"Thanks for being here, hyung." Yunho smiled gratefully, putting his bag behind the counter and placing his coffee mug on one of the booth seats. Hongjoong nodded with a hum. Mingi would kill him if he had left Yunho alone.

"Are you nervous?" Hongjoong asked.

"Not nervous about meeting new people. More nervous about it not working out. What are we going to do if things don't work out? I'll be without a kitchen crew!" Yunho panicked.

"Okay, breathe. Yunho, everything will be fine. I'm sure things will work out. If they don't, we'll find a way." Hongjoong assured.

"You're right. Be positive!" Yunho fist pumped and smiled. Hongjoong gave an encouraging nod.

"So what should I do until they come? Clean the kitchen? Prepare some drinks? Order food?" Yunho asked, rubbing his palms against the side of his dress pants.

"There's no need to do or prepare anything. The kitchen is practically empty with barely any equipment and no one has been there so there's no need to clean now. They probably have their own food and drinks, they're a group of chefs. Just collect yourself, take a deep breath. You're just having a talk." Hongjoong chuckled.

"I'm gonna make a pitcher of some drink before they come. That's the only thing I know I won't mess up." Yunho said.

"Okay but they're not coming yet so occupy your mind with something else." Hongjoong waved him off. In the end, Yunho went to unpack some other stuff.

"Thanks for helping me get such nice plates at a good price, hyung." Yunho looked at the packaged plates fondly.

"No worries. I guess it's good that I did a lot of co-curricular activities, huh?" Hongjoong laughed.

"You're a lot better at this than me..." Yunho spoke, slightly sullen, leaning his hands on on the edges of the cardboard box. Hongjoong turned around, looking at his friend.

"What? That's not true..."

"Isn't it? You have the connections to find a kitchen crew. The only person I was able to find ghosted me. You were the one that knew where to get all these cool plates and stuff for the restaurant. I didn't even know where to get white coffee cups!" Yunho said.

"Yunho. This is your first time doing this. No one is expecting you to know everything or be an expert restaurateur. It is a learning process for all of us." Hongjoong comforted.

"Sure, I knew where to get pretty plates. But you managed all the contracting the design yourself." He continued.

"Still..." Yunho's lips curled in doubt.

"Really, no one else has as much energy as you to do so much on your own. It's the golden retriever energy only you have." He laughed. Yunho pouted at his teasing.

"Thanks, hyung." Yunho said. When the time drew closer to the meeting, Yunho prepared a pitcher of a mixed drink.

"I don't have much ingredients..." Yunho rubbed the back of his neck.

"What are you going to put in it then?" Hongjoong peered over the counter curiously. Yunho sighed, turning to the small bar fridge and what he had on the shelf. Luckily he had stocked some items already so it wasn't entirely empty.

"Black currant syrup, club soda, lime and mint. That's a drink I can make with what I have." He said, putting everything on the counter. He poured each component into the pitcher.

"Does it taste okay?" He poured a bit for Hongjoong to try.

"That's actually good." Hongjoong nodded in approval. Yunho let out a sigh of relief and went to get some clean glasses.

*DING*

Yunho's head shot up like a meerkat on alert when he heard the bell by the door jingle. He felt his heart racing but he willed himself to not parkour over the counter.

"Seonghwa." Hongjoong made the first move, giving Yunho about 5 seconds to recover.

"Yunho, come here." Hongjoong hissed but maintained a friendly smile. Yunho realised that he must have zoned out when they exchanged pleasantries and it was now his turn. He cleared his throat and went over to your group. You eyed him cautiously as he smiled brightly, almost too bright in your opinion.

"Hi! I'm Jung Yunho!" He said, wincing inwardly when he realised that he probably sounded too animated. His eyes fell on you, the only girl amongst the group.

"I'm (y/n). Nice to meet you." You weren't emotionless, more stoic. There was a cool aloofness about you.

"Likewise. Thank you for meeting us on such short notice." Yunho shook your hand.

"Weren't we the ones who requested the meeting?" You asked with a slightly raised eyebrow. The male beside you stifled a laugh while Seonghwa cleared his throat, nudging the male.

"Wooyoung, one of the sous." The laughing male introduced with a fake smile but made no effort to shake Yunho's hand.

"Jongho. Prep chef." The last male introduced.

"So that makes (y/n) here, our head chef. She doesn't like titles so she never introduces herself with them." Seonghwa placed his hands on your shoulders, moving you to the front of the group. You turned to shoot him a dirty look.

"P-Please! Let's sit down! Help yourself to some refreshments." Yunho gestured, realising you were all still standing around. You sat together at one of the tables.

Yunho and Hongjoong on one side while Seonghwa, you, Wooyoung and Jongho sat opposite them.

"Did you make this?" Jongho asked, taking a sip of the drink.

"Yes, it's all I had in stock so far! So it may not be the best." You watched as Yunho's shoulders deflated slightly, almost reminding you of a sad puppy.

"It's good. Like the muddling of mint and lime." Wooyoung said. He handed you a glass to take a sip.

"So, I saw from Seonghwa's LinkedIn that you guys participate in a lot of pop ups and professional kitchens?" Hongjoong asked.

"Oh, that's way outdated. Here. This is the full list of the places we have worked as a team." Seonghwa took some papers out and slid them over to Yunho and Hongjoong. They flipped through it together. The subsequent look of awe that Yunho gave all of you made the corners of your lips curl up slightly.

"I guess we want to know more about your restaurant here. Seonghwa shared some things but it would be good if you could reiterate. What's expected of us?" You spoke.

"Well, this place will be a cafe in the morning. Then at night, I would like to have it as a restaurant." Yunho cleared his throat.

"What cuisine?" Jongho followed up.

"There's no set cuisine. I want customers to be able to experience all types of dishes, whatever is in the market. Like an omakase? But of course, we don't need michelin dishes." He explained shyly.

"I see. That sounds interesting, I can get behind an omakase concept. Well, Mr Jung-"

"Please call me Yunho." He blurted.

"Right, Yunho... The main concern right now is that, we know the... situation that you are currently in, in that there will only be 4 of us in the kitchen. My team and I are concern over the workload. Cafe stuff in the morning then dinner at night." You informed.

"I completely understand. What do you propose is the best solution?" Yunho asked. Hongjoong turned to look at Yunho, why was he asking you this when he was the owner?

"You're asking me? Can you share how many cakes and pastries you are planning to have? Or dinner dishes?"

"Well, a variety would be good. 3 baked items and 3 cakes? I have not thought about quantities of dinner dishes." Yunho confessed.

Hongjoong wanted a facepalm, Yunho was being way too honest now. But he couldn't outwardly react and make Yunho doubt himself. All he could do was sit there and watch this unfold.

"What about barista duties?" Wooyoung asked.

"My friends and I will take turns. They'll be the wait staff at night." Hongjoong said.

"They've also volunteered to help in the kitchen if and when necessary!" Yunho added, nodding with a grin.

"I think I understand a bit more." You said, eyes shifting to Seonghwa. Seonghwa met your gaze, giving a subtle nod.

"Can we see the kitchen?" Seonghwa requested. Yunho nodded, almost too excitedly. He stood up and jogged over to where the kitchen is, turning the lights on for the 4 of you to walk around. The kitchen was big, the counters, fume hood, ovens and fridges were definitely new.

"There's no much here right now except for the basics but if you all decide to work here, I'll put in an order for more equipment that you will need." Yunho said.

"It's a big space. And the walk in is decent." Wooyoung told you. You nodded your head.

"Is it okay if I confer with my team in here for a while?" You turned to Yunho, who blinked in surprise.

"Y-Yes! Of course! Take all the time you need." Yunho smiled and left with Hongjoong. Just as you were going to speak, the door opened slightly and Yunho left the pitcher of drink in there for you.

"He's a weird one." Wooyoung noted.

"Coming from you?" Jongho raised an eyebrow, making Wooyoung roll his eyes. You leaned against the counter.

"He's definitely... chipper. An interesting character. But does he not remind you of an overgrown puppy though?" You chuckled. The 3 boys looked at you, you have never had such a laugh or 'positive' reaction when meeting someone for the first time.

"I mean, sure?" Even Seonghwa, who has known you the longest, didn't know how to react. He thought you would be annoyed by Yunho's... clumsiness?

"That aside, thoughts on this?" You asked them. You were never one to be the first to share, more a listener than speaker.

"The idea of omakase is definitely fun. We always appreciate having creative liberty." Jongho said.

"And the owner seems... nice enough. I don't know if he just doesn't know, is desperate or kind. Letting us choose what equipment we need right from the get go?" Wooyoung scoffed.

"Maybe a little bit of all 3, Woo." You shrugged.

"I'm still thinking about the workload." Seonghwa said, refilling his glass with more of the drink Yunho made and taking a sip.

"The only work around I see from it... It's going to change our sleeping schedules for sure." You voiced out, making all of them look at you. You didn't have a sleeping schedule to begin with, which was why Seonghwa was always worried and he had to make sure that you even got some sleep at night.

"Before Hwa goes off on me not even having a sleep schedule to begin with, you know I mean more for you guys than myself." You held a hand up.

"You don't sleep so of course you don't have a sleeping schedule." Seonghwa scoffed.

"I do sleep, Hwa. I'm not a vampire." You glared.

"Anyway, do share what you had in mind." Wooyoung encouraged.

"We come in before dinner to start the prep. Get through dinner service then before we leave, prep batter and dough for the pastries. Those always need resting and refridgeration anyway." You started.

"Then we come back in the morning before opening and bake off the pastries. Once those are done, we do the 3 cakes, it shouldn't take us long. After that, we'll leave to rest for the day before coming back to prep for dinner." You finished.

"Hang on, before we say anything about what (y/n) just suggested, I just realised, we haven't asked about opening hours and day offs." Jongho raised his hand.

"That's true. Let's have some suggestions for the owner regarding that before we enquire." You crossed your arms.

"What sort of suggestions?"

"Any." You shrugged.

"I would suggest, Thursdays close to prepare for the weekend rush and Mondays close to rest from the weekend rush. If he doesn't want two days of closure, Sunday half day. We'll do brunch."

"That's not a bad idea." You thought about it before nodding.

"We passed a church on the way so Sunday is good to have brunch. And since Monday is work and school day, not many people will be out looking for dinner spots. If not, do a half day Monday. People are tired from Monday blues, they won't go out for dinner after work. But they will stop by for coffee and a muffin before work." He said.

"Wow, I don't think I've ever heard Wooyoung hyung speak with so much sense before." Jongho snorted, making Wooyoung slap his shoulder. But when Jongho squared up, he ducked.

"Seonghwa hyung! Help!" Wooyoung hid behind the oldest.

"This is why no one can take us seriously." You rubbed your temples, shaking your head.

"Ah, don't say that! If you didn't love us, you would have kicked us out AGES ago." Wooyoung grinned, hugging your arm. You rolled your eyes with a sigh.

"Well, that aside, what do you guys think? About working here." You asked as Wooyoung continued to cling to you.

"Not as shady as I thought it would be." He said.

"I don't mind it... I guess. It's hard to know what to expect when even the owner doesn't seem to know what to expect." Jongho spoke. Seonghwa nodded slowly, agreeing with what Jongho said.

"What about you, (y/n)?" Seonghwa asked back, knowing you would ask him first.

"I say we give it a shot. This is definitely not like our usual professional kitchens, we'll probably be sourcing suppliers and produce vendors on our own but it's a challenge. It'll be like our own start up kitchen." You said honestly.

"Then we'll try it. I think we should propose a trial period for both the owner and us then we confer again." Seonghwa suggested. The rest of you nodded.

"Yeah, I think the owner is already scared of my precious girl here." Wooyoung pinched your cheek.

"I barely said anything."

"Exactly." Seonghwa laughed. After that, you exited the kitchen. You saw Yunho wiping the counter relentlessly, as if there was a stain that wouldn't go off. You tilted your head, letting out a small laugh.

"Psst." Hongjoong smacked Yunho's head when he saw you walking out. Yunho straightened up and tossed the cloth aside.

"Please." Yunho nervously gestured for you all to resume your seats from earlier.

"A few things were discussed during our talk. We would like to ask about off days here? What will be the opening and closing hours of the place." Jongho asked.

"Not that I have not thought about it but I was actually wanting to discuss that with all of you. To find out what timing works best for your crew since it is going to be long shifts. But regular hours will be 8am to 2pm then we break and come back at any time to prepare for dinner. First dinner service is 6pm?" Yunho spoke.

"That's fair. Wooyoung?" You turned to the male on your right.

"I proposed Thursdays off to prepare for the weekend. Then either a half day on Sunday or Monday." Wooyoung leaned forward.

"Reason?" Hongjoong asked.

"Sunday, we were thinking of doing a brunch menu. With the next day being a working day, hardly anyone will be out for dinner on Sunday." Wooyoung reasoned.

"And after a gruelling Monday, no one will want to stay out for dinner. It'll be a break from the weekend rush as well." He continued.

"I agree to closing on Thursdays. As for Sunday or Monday... I think a brunch menu on Sunday is a good idea. Between the two, the reasons both make sense. But I'm leaning towards a half day on Monday." Yunho said.

"So the schedule we are thinking of working with is; dinner service. Then we prepare pastry batter and/or dough for the night. Come in early, bake those off and the cakes." You informed.

"We should be done by the morning and we'll leave to rest before returning for dinner service prep." Seonghwa finished.

"That sounds good." Yunho turned to Hongjoong for confirmation. The smaller nodded.

"If you could draw up a contract for a temporary period of work, for both your side and our team to test the waters, it would be greatly appreciated." You spoke.

"Y-Yes! I mean, sure." Yunho smiled, coughing as he realised how overly enthusiastic he sounded.

"We look forward to working with you." The 4 of you stood up, shaking hands with Hongjoong and Yunho.

"Us too. Thank you." Hongjoong and Yunho bowed gratefully. Seonghwa eyed you and the way you were subtly studying Yunho, you were curious about the tall, overgrown puppy.

"So we'll see you in 2 days? I'll have the contract drawn up by tomorrow." Yunho's eyes sparkled, unable to hide his excitement. You nodded and grabbed your things. After exchanging numbers, Seonghwa's hand came to rest on your lower back as he guided all of you out of the restaurant.

As you walked out, you caught a glimpse of Yunho. He was laughing animatedly, jumping up and down with his arms around Hongjoong while Hongjoong seemed uncomfortable with the hug, trying to push Yunho away.

"Thank you, hyung!" He yelled, fist pumping. You couldn't help but snort out a small laugh.

"Well, boys. Looks like we've got our work cut out for us." You said.

"Shall we go to (y/n)'s for drinks?" Jongho asked. You nodded with a shrug, the boys were always over at your place to eat and drink. They'd rather get drunk at your house than in public.

"I don't think I've ever seen you so amused by an individual you've just met. Are you actually charmed by him?" Seonghwa asked you.

"No, I'm not." You denied.

"Liar." Seonghwa coughed. You shot him a look while he looked away innocently. You rolled your eyes, walking with him at the back as Wooyoung and Jongho walked in front of you, the both of them engrossed in their own conversation.

"He's just... different. I mean, Woo is energetic but he's a whole new level. He's so... positive." You shrugged.

"Well, my darling, not everyone is as broody and scary as you are. Some people actually enjoy their life." Seonghwa laughed, lacing fingers with you.

"I do enjoy my life. And I'm not broody." You frowned.

"Sure..."

"Hey, you're equally as scary as me. You made the kids at the playground cry when we were little. You're lucky I even wanted to be your friend." You scoffed, swinging your interlocked hands.

"I only made them cry because they were bullying you. They didn't let you have a turn on the swing." He defended.

~

Series masterlist

[wheneclipsefalls]

Ma Neteyam pt. 15

Pairing: Aged up Omega Neteyam x Alpha Male OC

Masterlist I Ma Neteyam Chapters I AO3

Warnings: swearings, violence, angst, trauma, oldest sibling syndrome, omegaverse, abo, power imbalance, dom/sub dynamics, stockholm syndrome, sexual content, etc.

Summary: It is time for Neteyam to face the music, or in this case, face Eywa.

A/N: This may have taken forever but I couldn't be more excited to finally post this! Thank you all for hanging in there. Let me know what you think<3

Neteyam idly ran his thumb over the curved carvings along the bow. It was pristine, beautifully mesmerizing with the hand carved designs running up and down the wood smoothly. He couldn’t have carved one better himself. His own bow back with the Omatikaya still had scratchings from his early teenage years where he hadn’t learned the art of wielding a knife carefully. 

“I’m afraid I’ve been slightly negligent with courting gifts and this one took much longer than anticipated.” Kxolo admitted, watching Neteyam diligently as the boy observed the gift. “Hopefully it is up to your standards, my love.” Hints of a fond smile were laced with the slightest flinch of nerves. 

“It’s beautiful.” Neteyam breathed. 

It was everything and more that the omega could have hoped for in a courting gift. The type of gift that he had spent far too many nights dreaming about alone in his hammock to one day receive from a handsome alpha such as Kxolo. It was moments like these that he found it terrifyingly difficult to not pretend their situation was normal. To pretend that Kxolo was simply another alpha who had strolled in and stole his heart through charm and traditional courting. 

And yet, that couldn’t be the case, because this bow symbolized more than love or desire to court. It showed that the Olo’eyktan was now officially trusting him with weapons. Were it a traditional courting such a trust would never need to be forged again.There never would have been a doubt in the first place that he would keep violence directed away from his lover. 

Neteyam wished that this realization alone would have been enough to keep affection from spreading  over his heart as he marveled at the tender care and effort that was put into the gift. It was disorienting and borderline painful that such conflicting emotions managed to cohabit his mind and heart. 

“It’s a start.” Kxolo corrected. “You like it then?”

“I love it.” 

“So then what is wrong?”

Neteyam could feel the radiating body heat coming from his mate as he shuffled to sit behind him, wrapping those muscular arms securely around his waist. Soothing pheromones came in gentle waves towards him, breathing in the musky scent that he knew only as Kxolo. It was no longer a thought that instigated his body’s reaction to his alpha’s face rubbing along his neck. Every reaction had become instinctual and impossibly difficult to go against. 

That is if he wanted to.

Did he want to? 

Silence hung as a heavy answer, enough to have Kxolo pressing further.

“Of course, I do not expect you to leave behind your Omatikaya bow. Perhaps I can send a good word over to your family and arrange for it to be brought over soon.”

The thought was almost laughable, especially with their reluctance to speak on the current trip Tamil was making over to the Omatikaya clan today. Neteyam didn’t need verbal confirmation to know that sending Tamil over specifically had been a strategic choice. And an even more strategic choice to keep Kxolo at home, far enough out of the range of his father's axe.

Neteyam could already feel the knot in his stomach tightening as he imagined the news being broken to his father. Neteyam had presented…and Kxolo had not stayed away. The only bright side Tamil could possibly present is still the lack of a mating bond. Even with Tamil’s calm countenance and measured words, it would not be enough to keep Jake from flying off the handle. 

Would it be enough to have his father, Olo’eyktan of the Omatikaya clan, breaking peace in order to storm the village and rescue his son? Kxolo seemed convinced that it would not come to that, but the alpha always had a way of finding confidence in situations that Neteyam himself could not fathom. 

“No need…this one will do more than fine.” 

“I would be more than happy to take you out hunting, baby boy.” Kxolo paused, head swaying from side to side as he internally deliberated his next words. “Although I do recall your father once telling me that you often insist upon hunting alone at times, against his best wishes. Promise to be careful and I may be inclined to do so upon occasion.” 

Neteyam was nodding before the words had fully left his mouth. Promises of safety and caution rained from his lips and luckily Kxolo took them in stride with a chuckle and sweet peppered kisses. 

A viperwolf scattered along an overhead branch but Neteyam ignored it. A perfect hunting target and yet this newly crafted bow had only served as decoration thus far. He couldn’t even bring himself to load an arrow. Kxolo had left him alone to hunt at his leisure with an implied promise of bringing back a less solemn Neteyam. However, Neteyam knew where he needed to go-what he had to do. 

Every step on the path towards Vitraya Ramunong [Tree of Souls] felt weighted, the thumping sound ringing in his ears. He walked as if he could crumble under the true pressure of this impending moment, this occasion that could change his life. Neteyam was not one to underestimate the influence of Eywa’s conclusions. Amid his time here, however, the idea that Eywa was simply used as an excuse for this kidnapping had rooted itself deep into his mind. Never had he questioned her decisions because it had been obvious she played no real part in his current circumstance. 

That idea had increasingly become harder to hold onto and although a part of him didn’t want to know the truth, it was the right thing to do. His parents could only be held at bay for so long and Neteyam needed to know whether or not this mating would truly be worth going against them.

A mating that strong could only be one fated by Eywa. 

And yet when the shimmering vines came into view Neteyam could only feel a strong urge to bolt in the opposite direction. Perhaps there would still be time to get some hunting in after all.

He pushed the temptation aside and reminded himself that this was his responsibility. Framing tasks like that always made them easier to beckon because that was a concept he fully understood, one he was used to following ever since he was a small boy. 

The Tree of Souls was everything beautiful and more. 

How had he managed to stay away for so long?

Neteyam carefully lowered himself to his knees amongst the glowing roots. His bow was placed to the side and the omega spent more time than necessary putting it in the right place and fidgeting with his clothing. He even took time to bat away every stray hair sticking out from his braids. 

His throat constricted, feeling as if he had swallowed a yovo fruit whole as he reached behind to grasp his kuru. The braid was heavy in his hand as he brought it over his shoulder. The tendrils danced and waved in the breeze without care but even the thought of connecting it to a vine made his stomach flip. 

There was no turning back from this.

No matter the outcome he would no longer be able to sit idly in this gray area.

Fight his parents or fight the man who had captured his heart?

The dam broke. The last shreds of resistance keeping his emotions at bay burst at the seams and Neteyam could no longer fight the rising sob. The world mixed into a  blurry mess as large tears invaded his vision without reprieve. HIs lungs contracted and ached until the only sound in this oasis was his garbled sobs. 

It was complicated. Complicated and messy. 

There was simply no path that would be without heartbreak and trials. However there was more than struggle that awaited him, something deeper that raked his trepidation higher. 

Guilt.

Guilty for not trying hard enough to get home.

Guilty for pushing away a fated mate. 

Guilty for waiting so long to seek the truth. 

Surely even Eywa herself would look down upon his actions because Neteyam was raised better than this. He was the son of Toruk Makto, a Sky Person turned Na’vi legend. He was the son of Neytiri Te Tskaha Mo’at’ite who was only a young woman when she lost her sister and took her place in the clan only to then lose her father, home, and future role as Tsahik in one day. Neither had shirked away from the destiny Eywa had handed them. They had risen above their own expectations and became the people they were truly meant to be. 

They took world shattering news in stride before jumping into action and now Neteyam couldn’t even get himself to communicate with the Great Mother. 

This was not who he was supposed to be. Omega or not, Neteyam had always known he held the mantle among his siblings. What example was he setting for them?

The omega’s small hands covered his face in despair, foolishly hoping to hide his face from Eywa’s all-seeing eyes. 

“Neteyam?”

His sobbing choked into a garbled mess in his throat as he desperately wiped at his tear streaked face. It took several swipes for him to recognize Tamil’s figure in the distance.

He was back already?

How long had he sat there crying like a child?

“I-I’m sorry. I was just about t-to get back. Lost track of time.” Neteyam tried to dart to his feet but Tamil stopped him with a calm hand. 

“Mawey Neteyam. Stay.” Tamil’s voice purred forward with such tenderness and sincerity, Neteyam couldn’t help but relax back on his knees. Calming alpha pheromones radiated from him and although they smelt like stale dirt compared to Kxolo’s, the omega felt his muscles release tension. 

It was only when a small gargle sounded that Neteyam finally noticed the squirming baby in Tamil’s arms. The small child flopped to and fro as the alpha slowly sat across from him. Her eyes were the size of moons as they glistened in the glowing lights, chubby hands already reaching towards any vine she saw. 

Neteyam couldn’t pin down why if his life depended on it, but the sight of her made whatever resolve he had scrambled together break once more. The sobbing returned and no amount of self discipline could keep back is undignified crying. 

Tamil placed a comforting hand on the omega’s shoulder as he cried. 

The alpha didn’t speak. He didn’t ask questions. He didn’t even urge the boy to calm his crying. 

He simply waited.

Tamil’s daughter simply watched on with curious eyes. Once the crying had become old news, she started to reach for some of Neteyam’s loose braids. A pout quickly formed on her lips when her father pulled her back from tugging on them. 

“Do you want to hold her?” Tamil asked softly. 

Neteyam nodded frantically, unsure of why he craved to hold the small child so badly. Tamil handed her over with such gentle care, Neteyam felt as if he was carrying the rarest jewel as he placed her on his lap. 

Although he tried to keep her neatly upright on his lap, she seemed to have other ideas. She could barely crawl but what she lacked in leg strength she made up for in her strategic scooting over his legs. Little huffs left her lips as she dug her nails in his legs and pulled herself forward. Those golden eyes never strayed from his swinging braids. She had a goal.

“What is her name?” He whispered, voice heavy. 

“Vili.” 

Finally her stubby fingers latched onto a braid and a delighted giggle escaped her as she tugged on it. Neteyam winced slightly but a surprised laugh replaced his sobs this time. Tears still rolled down his cheek but there was now something else to focus on. Her small body strained as she went for a specific blue bead in his hair.

“Apologies, hair is her current fixation. It is only by Eywa’s mercy that I am not already bald.” Tamil informed but there was anything but ire present in his tone. He laughed and tried to detach her vice-like grip from Neteyam’s braids. 

“It is fine.” Neteyam barely managed to get out, other hands softly stroking her thin curls. The touch snagged her attention, doe eyes looking up at him suddenly. When he repeated the action, Vili leaned into the touch clumsily. She released the hold on his braids and suddenly she was slumping against his chest, snuggling close. 

Another wave of emotion washed over him as he held the small baby close. 

“You are troubled.” 

“I…I was only…”

“It is fine, Neteyam. I would be concerned were you not.” 

Surprise flickered through him, eyes snapping up to meet Tamil’s. 

“I do not envy your position.” The alpha clarified, pulling Vili’s thumb from her mouth. 

It felt silly to be surprised by the statement but there were days where it seemed everyone took the kidnapping situation in stride,seeing it as simply a small hurdle for the new couple. Kxolo always kept a strong face, reluctant to let on his own concerns about the tension with the Omatikaya clan. 

“They are going to hate me.” Neteyam was startled to find what originated as a simple thought come out in whispered form, but since it was out, the words wouldn’t stop. “I was supposed to be finding a way to get out of here and yet all I have done is fail. No worse, I have gone against everything my parents have taught me and allowed myself to fall for the psycho that kidnapped me. I go to stop and back track….but then….I can’t. I’ve….I’ve betrayed my parents, my siblings, my clan! I’ve given over my own purity and now my parents will hate me. I am not the firstborn they deserve!”

Tears slipped down his cheeks so fast they began to drop on Vili’s head. Her nose scrunched in confusion before patting at her own head. 

Sharp teeth sunk into his bottom lips as he tried to hold back more disgraceful sobs. Although he was on the verge of breaking into a million pieces, there was satisfaction in having the words said out loud. As if they were something he no longer had to hold on his own. They were shared. 

Not daring to glance up at the alpha, Neteyam let the silence stretch between them.

“Vili had trouble breathing when she was first born.”

Neteyam quirked his eyes up finally. 

“Those were longest two minutes of my life. When she did start breathing normally I would refuse to take my hand off her chest. I fell asleep to the rise and fall of her chest. I say with no exaggeration, it was the most terrifying day of my life.” Their eyes connected, a seriousness falling over them.

“And without a doubt the greatest day I shall ever know. I thank the Great Mother for her every night.”

The tension slipped and Neteyam found himself smiling down at Vili who wouldn’t stop kicking her legs at his arm. 

“I do not expect you to understand, Neteyam.” 

Neteyam brows furrowed.

“Only a parent can truly comprehend what it means to love someone unconditionally in the way we love our children. But hear my words when I tell you there is not a single thing that my daughter could do to make me love her a morsel less. That will never change.” 

Neteyam gulped down the lump in his throat. Vili had found a new interest in the omega’s stomach, gummy mouth chomping down painlessly on his lower stomach. 

“Your parents love you. If I didn’t know it before I surely know it after today.” 

Neteyam perked up, hands already shaky in anticipation. 

“What happened? Were they upset?” 

“Naturally, but you need not over concern yourself. That is not my point.” Tamil, pursed his lips, lost in thought for a moment.

“Your parents love you and will continue to love you no matter what you do. You need not do anything to earn that love.”

The words turned over in his head on repeat. 

“But will they forgive me?” He whispered after a long pause, barely more than a breath.

“That assumes you have done something wrong.”

“Haven’t I?”

“Only one being can answer that.” He responded, ever so gently removing Vili from his lap. 

The Tree of Souls had never burned brighter, etching its presence into Neteyam’s consciousness until it could no longer be ignored. Biting his lower lip, the omega casted his eyes upwards as the sacred seeds cascaded down flawlessly.

“And if I don’t want to know?”

Already on his feet with Vili situated on his hip, Tamil paused and smiled warmly down at him. 

“You wouldn’t be here if you didn’t.” 

And with that, Tamil silently began to walk away. Before leaving however, he turned once more.

“Neteyam.” He called, causing the omega’s attention to turn. “I see you.” 

Emotion gripped at his heart as he quietly whispered the same back. Tamil smiled but left without delay. 

Echoes of the forest surrounded him in a gentle ambience. Subconsciously, Neteyam thumbed at the designs along his new bow. 

It was time. 

Afraid his nerve would be fleeting, Neteyam hastily threw his kuru back over his shoulder and let the tendrils connect to the nearest vine. 

He cleared his throat, expecting to follow his usual routine of addressing Eywa, but a light blinded him before there was a chance. The words were caught in his throat and the forest scenery melted away before his eyes. Panic went to a find a grip  but then something new washed over him. 

Peace flowed through him in ripples, the same pulsations of an active Tree of Souls. It thrummed through his veins in perfect time with his heart. Only blinding light could be seen but Neteyam was calm. More calm than he had been in years. A peace that he could only vaguely remember experiencing in early childhood. 

Eywa’s love wrapped around him in the same way his own mother had held him close as a babe. There was no judgment, no retribution; just love. His worries took the back burner as he settled into the feeling, no longer letting his brain overwork itself to understand the situation. He accepted the light, accepted the peace, and opened himself up like a flower does to the sun.

Slowly his vision began to recover, revealing the familiar forest before him. However, this time Neteyam found himself no longer underneath the glow of glimmering vines. Slightly startled and confused, he took in his surroundings rapidly whipping his head back and forth. His gaze snagged on Kxolo’s form and although it was surprising to see him there, Neteyam couldn’t help but feel relieved. 

“Sempu! He broke my bow!” A small girl bursted through the trees holding a piece of thin wood. She darted to Kxolo without hesitation, flinging her small body at his calf to cling to.

Neteyam blinked, heart racketing in his rib cage as he witnessed the events. 

He expected Kxolo to be surprised, perhaps point the small girl in the direction of her real father and comfort her along the way but there was not a flicker of hesitation in his features. Instead, Kxolo let out a long sigh and fought back what appeared to be an amused smile. 

“Alright alright, mawey, sweet girl.” He easily positioned her on his hip and the small child instantly tucked her face into his neck and sobbed. She was not easily consoled, despite his efforts to pry an explanation out of her. “Come now, show it to me.” 

Finally the girl reared back to look up at Kxolo. Neteyam he had never seen a more perfected pouty face in his whole life. Her eyes were filled with tears and small lips so expertly set the omega was sure this particular expression was a familiar one to her. Kxolo, however, visibly softened upon seeing her distress. 

He examined the small strip of wood with the other hand before smiling.

“It is not broken, my love. Simply needs some mending.” His voice soothed over her but the result didn”t last long. 

“I told you!” Another child bolted from the treeline, this one at least a foot taller than her. The boy pointed an accusing finger at her. “She is always tattling on me but I didn’t even do it because it not even broken and-”

“Mawey mawey.” Kxolo reassured but that stern steel laced his voice. 

“But sempu, she is always trying to get me in trouble!”

“I am not!” The girl wailed, tears coming back at full force. 

“You crybaby!” 

Neteyam jumped in surprise because that was not a Na’vi term, in fact it wasn’t Na’vi at all. The young boy had switched to English and to further his shock the tiny girl appeared to understand him perfectly as she stuck her tongue out at him. 

“Stop it.” Kxolo accentuated each word with a pointed look.

Although it had a unique accent coating the sounds, there was no mistaking the truth. Kxolo was speaking English. Brows furrowing, Neteyam found it hard to compute the new information. It had become clear that this scene had to be in the future at some point but how? When? 

“Now now no more of that.” Kxolo spoke again in Na’vi as he swiped away the girl’s tears. 

“I want Mommy!” She cried out in English, already trying to find a way out of Kxolo’s arms. The boy on the other hand seemed to have already moved on with a simple eye roll before jetting past the Olo’eyktan. Kxolo caught him before he could slip away, hand gently holding him by the arm. The boy huffed and yanked back with all of his force but it was no match for his alpha father. 

Neteyam felt guilty admitting it, but he was tempted to laugh at the scene before him. Both children trying to pull away and run off to get into trouble while Kxolo simply held them tight and patiently led them towards the lake’s edge. 

“But then I hits em with a jet pack.” 

Neteyam looked close to see which child had spoken but neither had stopped their whining for a second. Instead his ears twitched as he heard a different voice coming from the treeline, a strangely familiar one. 

“That is not how a jet pack works, paskalin.” 

It was a bizarre thing to hear his own voice out in the open air, different from the way it sounds in his head, however nothing could prepare him for seeing a clone of himself emerging from the trees. Exactly like him in every way but this time there were two children attached to his side, one in his arms while the other got a free ride by wrapping around his leg. Looking close he could see the difference in age slightly, along with a few new ornaments in his hair but there was no denying the resemblance.

It was him. 

“Okays but mine specials.” The small boy cling to his leg urgently claimed. 

“Of course, baby.” He heard himself respond, now switching over to Na’vi. In his arms was another small child but this one had to be barely old enough to talk, thumb in his mouth while that small tail tried to wrap around Neteyam’s arm. 

“Daddy!” The tiny boy abandoned him to run over to Kxolo, thrusting a stick with a few feathers up towards him aggressively. “Look whats I mades.” 

“Wow! That is fantastic.” The last word in English was barely discernible, the Olo’eyktan struggling more with this one in particular. Kxolo eyes shot to Neteyams and he saw himself shoot the alpha a small smile in approval. 

“I knows.” The tiny boy agreed, already confident that this fact could be nothing but the simplest truth. 

Kxolo didn’t have a free hand to commend the boy so his tail wrapped around him instead. A fit of giggle burst from the boy as the tuff of Kxolo’s tail tickled at his cheek. It appeared to be just the distraction needed as the Olo’eyktan was finally able to turn and face Neteyam with a grin. 

“Yawntutsyip.” He greeted with a smirk but the small girl was already reaching for Neteyam. 

“Mommy! My bow!” She whined, thrusting the piece out. Neteyam offered a few words of comfort before awkwardly taking the bow and managing to still keep a hold of the baby in his arms. It took less than a minute to slot the string back into place and hand it back. The tears stopped instantly. 

“Time to bathe.” Kxolo purred but outrage broke loose. The older boy in his grip groaned and went to dart away causing him to set down his daughter so he could use both hands to bring him back. The girl took this opportunity to run over to Neteyam and cling to his leg, promises of never bathing again falling from her lips. 

Meanwhile the smallest boy had already left behind his art and was sprinting straight towards the lake. Neteyam’s own heart lurched for a second in panic when those stubby legs hit the water’s edge but to his relief it appeared the boy was quite the swimmer. Future him seemed to know this too as he focused his efforts on swaying his daughter to get in. 

Kxolo and their son were the last ones to get in. The Olo’eyktan had the older boy tucked under his arm, his legs dangling to the side as he pouted. Once his father had placed him in the water he went to make another break for it but Kxolo was already three steps ahead of him, shuffling back and forth to barricade the exit. 

The smallest boy giggled as he watched his older brother and father interact. 

“My turns! Catch me Daddy!” He shrieked before going to run away. The tiny boy ran straight into his older brother and bounced backwards into the water immediately. He surfaced with laughter and to Kxolo’s luck his older son had finally given up playing this back and forth game. 

The Olo’eyktan chased his younger son through the rippling lake for several minutes until the tiny boy had to climb onto a rock for a rest. 

It seemed that harmony had finally been struck as the kids giggled and chased each other through the lake. Kxolo took their smallest child and placed him into a makeshift leaf wrap by the lake, just enough water trickling in to allow the toddler to splash and play. 

Even from a distance Neteyam could easily see the way Kxolo’s eyes scanned over his future self, hands quickly coming to follow the curve of the omega’s back. 

Neteyam glared back at him playfully, tail swatting at his arm. The Olo’eyktan was neither swayed nor put out by the response. In fact, his smirks tipped upwards as he finally yanked his omega into his arms at last. 

“And you question how we got so many children.” Neteyam said.

“I don’t recall you complaining last night, omega.” Kxolo whispered against his neck. Even watching the interaction Neteyam could feel his own body shiver with anticipation. His future self seemed to share the sentiment as he blushed. This time, however, that blush was not followed by shying away or trying to hide it but rather giving his mate a playful smile and reaching to connect their lips. 

Kxolo cupped each side of his face tenderly, soaking in every swipe of their lips together like it was the last breath he would be allowed to take. 

A glimmer of teeth shone through as neither was quite able to hide their smiles in the kiss. Even Neteyam’s tail lazily swayed back and forth in delight. There was not a hint of tension or stress present in his countenance. Neteyam’s hands hooked underneath the Olo’eyktan’s battle band for grip before rising up onto his toes. Kxolo’s responding laugh was more visual than audible. 

“Ewww! Dad!” The oldest son groaned, nose scrunching up in disgust. Their daughter on the other hand began to giggle and sashay her way towards them, eyes wide and intent. When their son went to protest once more, Kxolo playfully splashed back at him and that was enough to start a full blown attack from the children. 

Chubby little hands swatted at the water earnestly, hoping that their combined forces would be enough to take down their parents. When Kxolo’s head snapped in their direction they scattered, already anticipating his retribution. With a mighty roar he dramatically charged after them, gathering them up in his arms easily as they shrieked in delight. 

The forest colors became saturated until light was blurring around him in every direction. That beam took him once more and Neteyam could no longer see the young family in the lake. 

When Neteyam opened his eyes they struggled to make sense of the visual before him. Sparkling vines swung from overhead, bathing him in their glow. Limbs heavy and head pulsing, the omega finally realized he was now laying on his back underneath the Tree of Souls once more. 

To say it was disorienting to come back to reality would be an understatement. His mind felt like it was suspended between two different times, the present and future. The real shock, however, was the deep aching in his bones as he realized this future had not occurred. At least not yet.

But that path would only form if he decided to accept a mating with Kxolo. Everything in that vision was nothing but an idea, one given by Eywa, but still just a speck of what could be. 

However, there was one fact that still remained in the present.

One that was true and had been true for a while now.

He loved Kxolo.

He was in love with Kxolo.

No other person ran through his mind on cycle. No other person made him feel so safe and cherished. No other person had ever captivated his mind body and soul in the same way Kxolo had. Intentional or not, Neteyam had fallen past the point of no return.

He thought of his future self, the way he had radiated a happiness that Neteyam had never fully recognized in himself. A complete metamorphosis. Neteyam couldn’t deny that his future had never looked brighter than in that snippet of time. 

Hope was a flame burning ever brighter. 

For so long he had felt guilty for going against his father’s disapproval of Kxolo. He had wanted so desperately to become like his parents, who fought for their future. But now he could see that they too had to go against the expectations of the clan, mother’s parents, and the RDA all so they could pursue a future that others could not yet comprehend. 

To honor his parents legacy he could only be true to himself.

Now it was his turn to fight for the future he saw. 

“I really should be at communal dinner with Neteyam.” Vamai protested, fingers lazily shifting the cut berries back and forth. 

“You are eating here.” Her father quietly reminded her. Her parents had insisted on an intimate family dinner for the night but were the tension to grow any higher Vamai was sure it would cut off her air flow until she suffocated. 

“But Neteyam has been acting strange for a couple days so I really should be there to make sure he is alright.” She explained. “Olo’eyktan would want the same.” It never hurt to throw Kxolo’s name in for good measure. 

Her father sighed before putting aside his half eaten fish. 

“If Olo’eyktan is upset about your absence I will apologize myself.” He countered and her mother laid a comforting hand on her shoulder. Vamai didn’t mean to be harsh towards her gentle mother but she couldn’t help but shrug the touch off. She was in no mood to be touched. 

Reluctantly accepting her fate, Vamai strapped herself in for the rest of a silent awkward meal. She wasn’t sure what her parents thought this would accomplish. It was not going to fix what had been done. 

“Epok says you are still not speaking to him.” Vamai’s father spoke in a smooth tone, even wafting calming pheromones her way. It was almost laughable the way they viewed her as a skittish prey ready to pounce away at any moment. 

“Well I am not related to him so therefore I am under no obligation to talk to him.” 

Her father’s composure cracked, brows knitted. 

“I take it you are still mad then.” Came his reply.

“Oh am I? I didn’t think that option was still available to me.” 

“Vamai,” Her mother tried to scold but it was more of a sigh to herself, a desperate plea to try and play nice. 

It seemed too that her father was struggling to approach the situation without things escalating. His tail stood on point and those ears were already perky and alert for any shift. 

“Settle, Vamai.” He warned but that spark of electricity was already vibrating through her. Sometimes that energy in her system flowed like a river, giving her the strength to push through physical bounds and explore to her content but other times it reacted like a live wire. It buzzed and hummed through her until she knew all those pent up emotions were going to fly out as lightning. 

Trying to keep it trapped in a box would only sour her mood in a different direction. Either it was going to come out in rage or it would flow as endless tears. She didn’t want to accept either. Doing so would push her parents to worry for her more. It was that same worry which had put them here in the first place. 

“Epok is a nice man, Vee.” Her father gently urged. “I was only trying to look out for your best interest.”

Lightning had always been her favorite. 

“So you hatch up schemes to mate us together? Going to him behind my back like that, convincing him to secure my hand? How is that in my best interest?” She shoved the leaf of berries off of her lap. 

“You have been stubborn. So unmovable from the beginning that you often get in your own way, sweetheart.” Her mother jumped in, her smooth voice such a harsh contrast to Vamai’s own distressed one. 

“That’s right. I’ve come to accept that you most likely will not want to mate with an alpha, your need to push at authority is something that I don’t anticipate going away, but that is why Epok was the perfect choice.” Vamai’s father added. 

Vamai’s jaw set so hard she could feel the aches settling into her back teeth. She fought the urge to grind them together. 

“He is strong, responsible, reliable, capable, and already shares a friendship with you. Not to mention holds a respectable status among the clan.”

“I didn’t ask for his courting profile.” Her cheeks began to flush a deep purple, the blood rushing to her head at abounding speeds. Eyes flickering to the door, possible escape had never looked more tempting. “Why would you try to make that decision for me?” 

It was evident that her father too was quickly losing his patience. Heavy breaths flared from his nostrils every time he prepared himself to speak. The civil temper in the hut was hanging by a thread and one that she was sure either herself or her father was going to snap. 

“I mean what did you think? Let us fuck enough times and I would fall in love with him?” 

It was her.

She snapped it.

And her father’s rage had boiled over. Once again her mouth had run away from her and had therefore put herself in the line of fire. 

“Vamai Te Zehu Sehu’ite, you will watch your mouth!” He towered over them standing at full height. 

It was only instinctive but Vamai still hated the way her ears pulled back and tears gathered in her eyes. Her omega was a whimpering mess and on the verge of surrendering to this fight. It didn’t matter though, she had dealt with worse. 

Although her father’s hands were balled into fists and scent wafting with anger, it seemed he too could sense her shift in emotions through that betraying essence. 

His voice softened, “I am less than pleased about the…manner of your relationship but once again Vamai it had only come to that because it was the only way you allowed Epok close to you. Every other suitor who has tried for your hand has been shoved away and rebuked by you. You must know that does not do well for a male’s willingness-”

“Poor babies.” She muttered, arms crossed over her chest as she stared at the door to their hut. 

“What your father is trying to say is that we are worried about you. Finding a mate is a joyous endeavor, but also a very important decision. It can be…painful at times to go without one, especially as an omega.” 

Vamai knew her mother was trying to speak from a place of experience but it was difficult to ever relate her own character to that of her mother. Her mother was gentle, soft spoken, kind and caring. Somedays Vamai felt as if she could not be further from the descent of her parents. 

“You act as if I will never get mated. It’s not as if I have sworn off the entire concept. Just because I don’t have feelings for a few village alphas? So what? You just said so yourself that the choice is important.” 

Her parents shared a look, one that made the electricity crackle in her veins. 

“My child,” Her father crouched down and reached to cup her cheek. Those calming pheromones prowling once more but Vamai scowled back at him. “Your path thus far has been a rocky one. One that I would have never wished upon my only daughter.”

She reeled away from his touch. 

“That’s what this is about? You know I will get mated but you don’t trust my taste.” 

Her father’s gaze snagged her own and it took every fiber in her to hold the look.

“I made one mistake! One. Is that what you want me to admit? Tenatu was a mistake! I was young and foolish and let my emotions get the best of me. I know that, believe me, I will never forget it!”

“Vee” Her mother's soft voice cooed but Vamia was already pulling away from her gentle touch.Too scrambled and on the edge of a breakdown to think, she grabbed her small pouch and shoved the weird neck comm into it before her parents could see what it was. 

“Vamai, do not be hasty.” Her father warned, but she was already parting the hut flaps.

Anxious for a quick retreat, she was not prepared to bump into a hard chest. Vamai stumbled backwards as two hands went out to steady her. 

“Oh, Vamai. Are you alright?” Epok asked, trying to help the small omega get her footing. 

She scoffed, ripping her arms from his grasp and turning back to her father. 

“What a wonderful dinner you had planned, sempu.” She gritted out, face already turning a darker shade with rage. 

She didn’t allow either male to speak, didn’t give them the time to persuade, justify, or defend their actions. It was clear that tonight she was in fact the fool. 

So Vamai did what she knew how to do best.

She ran. 

“I’m not in the mood, today.” Lo’ak grunted out, storming away from Amnu.

His father had been raging since that morning per the news. Lo’ak was surprised both of his parents didn’t jump the messenger Kxolo sent, no matter how soft spoken or gentle he was about delivering it. Regardless, that anger had shown through in training. Jake had run the warriors down to the bone, merciless with his corrections of every single infraction. Each screw up had come with a consequence, reminiscent of Jake’s military days and something Lo’ak was all too familiar with experiencing. 

At the end of the day, he was exhausted, infuriated, and craving nothing more than to speak with his feisty omega. As tough as Vamai thought she was, her insults could do nothing more than brighten his day. 

“It is true then.” Amnu said, ignoring his warnings. 

Lo’ak grinded to a halt. With a bone chilling stiffness, he turned to face the other alpha male. 

“What. Is.” He hissed, teeth already preparing to tear the male limb from limb. It had been too long of Amnu’s pursuing and nagging. 

“What they say of your brother. He is mated with that psychotic Olo’eyktan.” 

Their game of chase quickly flipped on its head, Lo’ak’s long legs carrying him towards the male in stomping fashion.

“It is not.” His five fingers splayed over the male’s chest, pushing him backwards until he stumbled slightly. “Watch your mouth.” 

Amnu held his arms up in surrender, lips turned downwards. 

“Fine. I do not protest. In fact that is good news, especially considering our deal.” 

Lo’ak could already feel his sore muscles bunching up. This was not the conversation he needed today. 

“What the hell are you on about, Amnu?” 

“I’m talking about when I covered for your ass a few weeks ago. I was under the impression you would bring home a certain pretty omega. And yet, no Neteyam.” 

“First of all, I never promised you anything. You were the one that wanted to help get Neteyam back. Secondly, your help was nonexistent considering I still got turned over within a few hours.” Lo’ak’s hands balled into fists tight enough to mark half moons into his palms. He was in no mood to be tested, even less so engage with some horny entitled alpha. 

“You know that I would treat him better than that brain dead Olo’eyktan. You and I want the same thing.” 

Lo’ak swore he heard his teeth crack from the pressure of his clamped jaw. Amnu’s confidence, however, appeared to know no bounds as he calmly pushed forward. 

“Even if he has been,” Amnu paused, lips pursed while looking for the right term. “Sullied, you could say.” 

The first swing was instinctual. Lo’ak neither needed to think nor decide to give him a right hook. The second, however, was more precise, more intentional. Both made his knuckles ache, but it was more than a worthy cause. 

“You keep my brother’s name out of your filthy mouth!” 

Amnu stumbled and poked at his now bleeding lip but his features too soon morphed in a display of fury. 

“You seem to forget that before this whole mess I was courting your brother for months.”

“Oh really? Is that what those pathetic gifts were? Truly, I thought they were some garbage toys for Tuk.” Lo’ak sneered, ears pointed and alert for the receiving attack.

And it came. 

The other alpha rammed into him, bringing them both to the ground in a tangle of snapping jaws and swinging hits. Admittedly, Amnu got his fair share of hits in, but Lo’ak’s restraint was quickly circling down the drain. It was true that Amnu had been relentlessly pursuing Neteyam but his desire was no match for the swirling emotions that had been spiraling in Lo’ak for months now. 

So he channeled it.

Every jab, tug, and punch was fueled by that turmoil. 

Every day that had been spent trying to keep that fire inside, trying to fill in as a good older brother was compacted into his anger. Amnu made some scratches, even managed to pounded in some deep bruises but Lo’ak was less than deterred. 

He rolled them over, straddling the male and pushing him into the dirt violently. Amnu growled and squirmed but Lo’ak knew how to position his body so that escape was not his to be had. He pinned Amnu’s neck down with his leg, the pressure not enough to cut off the airway but still able to cause great strain. 

“You think that beating me up is going to bring him back?” Amnu’s hoarse voice egged him on. Another hit to the jaw. “It’s not my fault you failed.” 

And that’s when Lo’ak let the floodgates open.

Lip bleeding with scattered bruises along his stomach and face, Lo’ak stomped back to his hut. The fight had dialed his adrenaline to eleven and yet it still left him unsatisfied. In the end he had been triumphant but what did it really matter? Amnu was the least of his problems. His mother and father were sure to be fighting once more as they struggled to keep their emotions in check and find a solution. His older brother was swaddled in the arms of some asshole and his own love life was keeping him up at night until his training was suffering. 

Settling into his hammock, Lo’ak had never been more grateful to have a place to call his own. It gave him the solace and time to think that he required on days like today. 

“Lo’ak.” 

He shot upright, eyes scanning the ground for the earpiece faintly making the sound. He tried not to dwell on how fast he scrambled to respond. It had been a hard day. He deserved to hear her voice. 

“Little snitch, well well well. You do know how to start a comm link after all.” He struggled to keep the words light. Vamai had a knack for creating this playful conversation between them, however he was sure she would not describe their interactions in the same light. 

“Yeah….guess so.” She responded and Lo’ak blinked. 

“What are you up to?” He hesitantly veered forward, trying to gauge her reaction.

“Nothing really.”

Lo’ak brows furrowed as he winced and pressed on his bleeding lip.

“Nothing, huh? It’s kind of hard to do no-”

“Why are you talking strange?”She interrupted. 

“Strange?” He mumbled while pressing the cloth against his cut. 

“Yes, you sound different.” 

He paused for a moment.

“Oh that. I have a cut on my lip, just a minor-”

“How?”

It wasn’t rare for Vamai to be so blunt, but Lo’ak couldn’t help but notice her sudden attention. 

“I got into a fight. Nothing major, just the usual banged up cuts and bruises.” He shrugged, laying back down on his hammock. Talking to Vamai was meant to be his escape from the events of the day. The last thing he wanted was to get into the details. 

“And you have seen tsahik.” 

Lo’ak grimaced at the idea of facing his grandmother at a time like this. The last thing his family needed was to worry about the injuries his heated temper had bestowed upon him. 

“Well, I don’t think now is a good time for that. My family is a little…disarrayed.”

The silence hung heavy for a moment and Lo’ak found the questions at the tip of his tongue begging to let loose. He didn’t want to think about Neteyam or the Olo’eyktan or any of his problems, but there was always a temptation to beseech Vamai. Surely she would know if the rumors were true. 

“I can patch you up.”

His thoughts reared to a stop. 

“What? What do you mean?” He sprung back up in his hammock, muscles aching from the sudden strain. 

“Patch you up. Heal your injuries.”

His fingers ran over the neck comm, making sure there were no missing parts that could be distorting the signal. 

“Yes I….you could.” He swallowed. “Are you offering?” 

“I suppose so.” Came her reply and Lo’ak just about nearly fell on his face as he scrambled to unwind the hammock around his legs. What had gotten into her? Most nights he was lucky to get a ten minute conversation with her and now she wanted to see him? But not only that. Heal him, take care of him.

Although a primal part of him purred at the idea of his omega warming up to him, his suspicion couldn’t be ignored. 

“Meet me at the bottom of the waterfall.”

Lo’ak hastily agreed but there was no reply. 

The waterfall, the same waterfall he had jumped down after her. The same waterfall that at the bottom of he had tasted her essence for the first time. 

The same place she had forbidden them of speaking about for weeks. 

On the ride over Lo’ak struggled to suppress his urgency. He told himself over and over that it was sure to be a joke. Vamai had been…compliant with their comm conversations but any speak of meeting up again had ended with radio silence. He told himself that she was simply playing a prank on him and that the day would once again end with another disappointment.

It didn’t stop the flutter in his stomach, however.

A flutter that had burst into an avalanche when he landed to find her petite form sitting against a tree, arranging bowls of healing ointments. 

It couldn’t have been more than two weeks since he had a waft of her perfume but a serge of primal emotion swept over him at the familiar scent regardless. It rolled forward memories of how that essence had complimented her taste perfectly, of how she had moaned out his name and squirmed against his gripping hands.

More than anything however, it brought forth the memory of her small form in his arms. The way she had slept so softly against him. 

Now, however, that fleeting tinge of peace that had been present in her pheromones was nowhere to be found. In fact, Vamai sat still. So perfectly still and stiff that it had sent chills down his spine. He tried to get a read on her scent but there was a messy sprawl to it, like a tangled web holding what lied beneath. 

“You showed.” He forced on a smile as he rounded the tree. 

Vamai stiffened and nervously shuffled the bowls into a random order. 

“I said I would.” 

The anxious demeanor immediately put him on guard. When he caught her hand that was reaching for another bowl he spoke softly. “Are you alright?”

“Don’t do that.” She shoved him off. Weirdly the aggressive action felt more like her usual self. He leaned into it, hoping to press some sort of reaction or answer that would make sense. 

“Why not?”

For the first time upon arriving her eyes met his. They burned with a formidable rage but there was a shimmer of waterworks lined over them as well. Her lips quivered and immediately, Lo’ak’s tail jerked up on alert. 

“Vama-”

“Can you please just hold still so I can do this?” Vamai snapped. 

And although a part of him stirred at her disrespectful tone, even his alpha knew how to detect an omega in distress. He sat back on his knees quietly. 

She didn’t meet his eyes while preparing the healing balm, letting her wavy hair create a curtain to hide. Vamai was stoic as she began rubbing ointment into a cut on his collarbone, but there were tell-tale signs that Lo’ak couldn’t help but focus on. Her small fingers trembled with every motion over his cut. Although it stung, Lo’ak didn’t so much as flinch. 

Her golden orbs dared a glance at his beaten features. 

“You got injured like this how again?” She whispered, eyes intensely trained on the already treated cut in front of her. 

“A disagreement.” 

“Skxawng.” She huffed, but there was a waiver in her voice. “With who?”

“Just some moronic alpha that has an obsession with Neteyam. Thought it was his place to make swift judgments.” 

Her hand paused and from his vantage point Lo’ak could just barely make out her sharp teeth nipping into her bottom lip. 

“And he looks worse than this, right?” 

“Of course.”

Vamai nodded, shrinking back into her hair once more.

“Good.” 

Her touch became softer, increasingly more gentle when running over the bruises and cuts. She avoided his face, however, tending to every other area first. It tied a knot in Lo’ak’s stomach to see her this way. Quiet. Withdrawn. Small.

Vamai was often like a ticking bomb. On some days he couldn’t help himself from chasing to set her off, to get her to reveal something of significance. Their connection was real, he knew it and there was no denying that she must have felt it too, but he could never figure out what the big hold up was. 

However, he knew on certain days that it was crucial to handle her with care. If he had learned anything about bombs from his father it was that the smallest and seemingly most inconsequential moves were that same that had them blowing you to bits. 

Breath held in his lungs, Lo’ak ever so lightly rested his palm against her lower back. At first it was soft enough to be mistaken as a brush of wind but when she didn’t pull away, he allowed his hand to flatten across the soft skin. 

He couldn't see her face, couldn’t get an accurate read on her but her scent shifted dramatically. Then suddenly she was resting her forehead against his chest. His other hand dug into the dirt as he fought off every instinct to brush her hair away and see what was really happening. 

His patience was not tested for long however.

The shaking began and then came the sobs. 

Tears rained down on his chest as Vamai crumbled against him. 

His body reacted before his brain could catch up. She didn’t fight him as he pulled her to sit on  his lap and latched his muscular arms around her. Calming pheromones drifted from him without thought but nothing could mask her own essence projecting sadness, longing, and…fear.

His brows furrowed, terrified for a moment that he had become the source of this turmoil, but then she leaned closer until her face was burrowed in the crook of his neck. A shiver ran down his spine as he once again experienced this long awaited contact. 

Cheek laid against the top of her head, Lo’ak focused on keeping his breathing consistent and calm, something his omega could latch onto. It took considerable effort as his alpha was pulled between two different desires. To coddle and to protect. Surely this onslaught of emotions had to have an origin, one that his alpha was eager to exterminate.

How long had she been feeling this way?

Regardless, Lo’ak forced himself to remain calm and keep her bundled close against him. 

He hated to see her so distressed and yet it had never felt better to have her in his arms, to finally express his adoration through a physical outlet. 

Her wavy hair tickled at his nose as her sobs quietly rang through the air. One of her small hands found purchase along his battle band and Lo’ak’s heart fluttered in his chest. Daring to push the boundaries just a little further, Lo’ak carefully pushed a few curls away from her forehead. 

Her face was still buried against his neck but he could see the tears streaks staining her gorgeously soft cheeks and lips. He took it as a good sign when she didn’t correct this action, but Vamai wouldn’t open her eyes either. He wondered what secrets hid within those golden eyes. What sorrows she held at bay. 

When the tears had ceased neither Na’vi moved. 

She fit so perfectly against his larger form, tucked away where he could protect her from these invisible dangers. Pride swelled in his chest when Vamai shifted to tuck closer and relaxed in his hold. Long fingers skated up and down her spine, fiddling with the feathered straps intricately woven there. 

Incidentally his pinky brushed her curling tail. 

To his utter shock and delight that thin appendage curled around his wrist.

He looked down but her eyes were still shut. Staring for a moment, he thought that perhaps she had drifted off but then golden eyes peaked up at him through slanted slits. Immediately they closed against and Vamai shuffled to hide against his shoulder. 

He suppressed a chuckle, knowing she would bite back at him for finding the action cute. 

Instead he allowed himself to breathe in the moment. Silence was not a common occurrence between them, something he was unfamiliar with in their dynamic but he found himself enjoying it. It gave him the opportunity to fill his lungs with her essence, allow it to imprint itself into his mind, because he was not foolish enough to believe this would last forever.

At some point Vamai would remember who was holding her and remember whatever reasons she had for keeping him at arm's length. Then he would be back to chasing her, back to wrestling the omega into facing her own feelings. It was a challenge Lo’ak was willing to face, but it came with lonely moments too. 

It would be worth it though. 

This he knew as he brushed another curl from her temple. 

Kxolo believed he had a knack for patience and keeping a cool composure. That is, before he had met Neteyam and the omega had easily turned him inside out. 

It wasn’t uncommon to hunt solo for a few hours. Two, maybe three hours was normal. But when hour four hit, Kxolo could no longer keep his nerves at bay. He raced through the forest, barreling through bushing and scaling overturned trees within his path. 

Worst case scenarios tumbled and tangled in his mind, tormenting him endlessly as he ran. 

Neteyam had been off that morning. His head had been far away from the present and Kxolo regretted ever letting the omega out to hunt alone in that state. The forests of Pandora were not for the faint of heart and definitely not for those distracted. He could only imagine what creature had found him as prey. 

Kxolo’s hand was drawing up to unsheath his knife when suddenly a familiar figure came into view.

Instantly the Olo’eyktan sagged in relief. 

“Neteyam.” He breathed. “There you are, baby boy.” 

He sheathed the dagger once more and quickly went to embrace the omega. Neteyam fell into the hug easily but his tail flickered back and forth in anticipation. Kxolo’s own tailed pointed in alert. 

Holding the boy back at arm’s length, Kxolo scanned his slim frame for injuries. 

“You aren’t hurt, are you?” He asked with brows knitted.

“I’m not.” 

Kxolo beamed, nerves finally washed away. 

“Come, I will help you bring back your kills.” Kxolo urged, taking him by the hand. 

“Kxolo”

“I must admit you had me worried, little one.” The alpha chuckled, hand squeezing the smaller one in his grasp. 

“Kxolo.”

“Yes love.” He hummed, focusing on following Neteyam’s footprints back to his hunting grounds. 

“Kxolo.” Neteyam firmly yanked on the male’s hand, causing the alpha to immediately spin on his heel to face him. The Olo’eyktan’s ears perked up. 

“Neteyam, what-”

“Mate with me.” 

Thank you all for the support and patience! As always, your feedback and comments not only mean the world to me but also motivate me to write more. Can't wait for Chapter 16!

Taglist: @tallulah477 @kayjaydee17 @itchaboi-itchyboy @theunfortunateplace @perfectprofessorloverapricot @neteyamssyulang @4ashes-stuff @creepytoes88 @young5643-blog @glass-rosette @namjooncrabs @softsnowydreamer

Please let me know if you want to be added or taken off of the Ma Neteyam taglist&lt;3

[charlesf1leclerc]

KEEPING UP WITH THE LECLERCS Masterlist

Welcome to the world of the leclercs. Everyone’s favrouite family. Follow this page to see updates for their life. Scroll to see master list below

who we’ve met so far…..

The father / husband of everyone’s dreams

The best wife / mother of Charles children he could of ever asked for

The oldest daughter of the Leclercs

The middle child of the Leclercs

With many more new additions to come to this page as we watch the family grow!

Just letting you know I will get to your request envolving all three leclerc kids soon I just want to introduce the other two kids to the series before I write requests with all three kids in them but those fics and your request are not ignored and I will write all your requests with all three kids soon I promise

MASTERLIST

A new chapter- the birth and journey of welcoming the first leclerc baby to the world

The very firsts- A short post about Indy Jules Firsts

baby leclerc #2 - the Instagram thread of welcome the second leclerc baby to the world

caught- Indy Jules catches her parents doing something she shouldn’t of seen

Night routine - Night routine of the leclercs

EXTENDED MASTERLIST ( not part of the KUWTL )

rainy days are movie days- a little blurb of a rainy day with your boyfriend Ollie

first look- First look with Lando on your wedding day

young love- a family vacation with the Leclerc fam and Ollie and the Insta post from hell

the reception- y/n and Landos wedding reception. part two to first look

studying with you-Oscar Piastri helps you studying and ensures you there is no where else he would rather be.  marry me French girl-you learn French in order to make a great first impression on Charles family and Charles is over the moon about it 

[stuff-i-found-while-crying]

A Stage of Fire and Dreams (6)

inspired by @gwandas and they post: modern Neris AU where Eris is a trust fund asshole at Harvard Law, Nesta is a professional ballerina with the Boston Ballet (although I am straying away from the concept... is that bad)

NEW CHAPTER and finally back in Eris POV 🧡

Eris gets a phone call from Cyrus. A phone call that makes him leave Nesta alone at dinner and run to safe his broken family.

Main pairing: Eris x Nesta

TRIGGER WARNING: Panic attack I physical abuse I blood

@erisweekofficial does this count for the prompt today? it is AU... anyway. Check out Eris Week. I have been so in love with the Art that was posted all week!

first part - Giselle I second part - red shoes I part three - Cinderella I part four - dinner for two I part five - Interlude

Face of my brother

Eris knew something bad had happened.

Cyrus never called him. Unless it was about their mother.

"What happened?"

"He is loosing it", Cyrus said. His voice was shaking. Eris could hear something break in the background. "I don't know how to calm him down."

"Where is she?"

"Gabriel took her to the galleries."

Eris closed his eyes. His mother was save. At least one of his younger brothers was with her. Althought he would not put his faith in Gabriel.

"Are you alone?"

"Eris", Cyrus whispered. "You have to come home. Mom was calling Lucien and he found out."

This was bad.

This might be the end.

Eris felt the world tild on it's axes and then spin in double speed. His stomach knotted together. No air was getting into his lounges.

"Do you hear me? Hector is in a business meeting and I don't know what to do."

His younger brother was pleading with him. He needed to focus.

"I am on my way. Send the staff home. And check their phones before they leave. I do not want any press knowing about this."

As he hung up, he felt the panic rush his brain.

No air.

No safety.

No future.

Someone was touching his shoulder. Eris spun around, ready to fight.

But it was only the waiter, paitently assesing him.

"Would you like the pasta to go?"

Eris needed to focus. He was here on a date.

Nesta Archeron was sitting on a table and waiting for him to return.

His heart hurt. It broke. It blead. It pumped to much panic into his thoughts.

She could not see him like this.

Just the thought of her piercing grey eyes brought him to his knees.

He leaned against the wall next to him.

She would know.

"Mr. Vanserra?" The waiter was still waiting. Polite concerntniss on his face.

"Send the bill to my office", he whispered. "Give her everything she wants. And call her a taxi."

"As you wish."

And then he was alone.

Eris wanted to cry. He craved tears that would run down his face and drowned him. His chest should break open, letting the world see his bleeding heart.

Then he thought of Cyrus.

He could not loose another brother.

Beron Vanserra held a bottle of whiskey in his hand. No glass to drink from remaind. The pieces of crystal around the room a metaphor for their family. Eris did not know how to piece them back together.

"You are late", his father greeted him softly.

"I was out."

"Business or pleasure?"

A cold shiver went down his spine. "What happened here?"

His father turned to him. Eyes wandering around the room, realising the damage he caust.

"Your mother betrayed me." The words left him like a caress upon a lover.

Eris could feel Cyrus wimper behind him. But he could do nothing against Berons burning gaze.

"Do you want to say something, Cyrus?"

Years of experience had taught Eris to keep his mouth shut. As the oldest he had always been in close proximity of their father.

But Cyrus had never learned that lesson. "It was just a phone call."

The bottle flew towards him. Eris reacted on instinct and took a step in front of his brother.

Made out of harder material then the glasses on the floor, the bottle did not break.

Eris face was not as lucky.

"Fuck!" was all he could shout.

His father just looked at him. Then he turned back to the window.

"Pathetic. Send Hector to me. He seems to be the only one in this family that actually does what I want."

Eris entire face hurt. Tears clouded his vision. A hand was gripping his arm and Cyrus was pulling him out of the room.

"What the hell", his brother whispered. "Why did you do that."

"Because I am an idiot?"

"I call a doctor."

"No!" Eris winced. Blood was in his mouth. "I just need to cool it. It will heal in a couple of days."

"I don't know. It is a lot of blood."

Eris rolled his eyes. What Cyrus could not see because by now his entire face was swollen.

His brother guided him to the kitchen and gave him an ice pack. Immediatly Eris put it over his entire face, sighting with relieve.

He could hear his brother fussing around him.

"Calm down", he said.

"Calm down? Calm down?!" Cyrus was shouting now. "How can you be calm? Everyone will see your face and know what happened. And mom will cry again. You promised she would stop crying! You promised me."

There were tears in his voice. Eris lowered the ice pack and tried to look at Cyrus.

"Your nose is fine", his brother said. "It hit you under the eye."

"Thanks, Doc."

Cyrus threw a tissue box at him. "Clean yourself then, asshole."

For a moment the two brothers looked at each other.

"Sorry", Cyrus whispered and picked the box back up.

"It's alright. Not the worst thing that got thrown at me today."

Another moment of silence. Then the brothers burst out laughing.

"Oh God", Cyrus leaned against the kitchen counter. "Are we going mad?"

Eris, still laughing, took out his phone and turned on the camera to check his face.

The giant black bruise on his right cheek sobered him up. He could not go out like this in public.

"Well, maybe you can find a pretty nurse to take care of you." Cyrus grinned at him. "Unless you have a girlfriend hidden somewhere. Not that I would blame you. Who would want to be part of this Shit show?"

Who indeed? 

His thoughts wondered to Nesta Archeron. Would she nurse him, if he showed up with a bruised face? Or would she laugh at him?

Maybe she would finally let her walls down.

Maybe he would hate her for pitying him.

Eris carefully brushed his fingers over his cheek.

His body was starting to relax and the adrenaline left his system. He hated this feelling. Like clouds filling his brain and making him softer.

"I had a date tonight", he confessed.

Cyrus looked at him as if he had grown a third head. "You?"

"She was wonderful. Breathtaking. And I lost my chance."

"Because I called you", Cyrus said. "Shit, Eris, I am sorry. Had I known…"

Both brothers knew that it would not have changed a thing. This was their life. And at least they still had it.

"We should call Gabriel and mom", Eris said. "She has some explaining to do."

"I do that", his brother was eager to help. Like the lost puppy he had always been. "You should call your date. I am sure she will forgive you."

"I left her", Eris said softly.

"Okay?"

"Without explaination. I left her alone at a restaurant without explaining myself."

Cyrus was not a sensitive guy. But even he whinced at that. "Send her a pic of your face. That will win her back."

Eris was sure, that it would not. He took the ice pack and left the kitchen. Fresh air was what he needed.

As he stood outside in the garden, his mother had so carefully designed, he finally felt the last bit of anxiety leave his system.

Tiredness came like a soft blanket and wrapped up all his thoughts.

He dialed Nestas number.

She did not pick up.

He took a picture of his face.

___

This story is also on AO3.

I might switch to only posting there... What do you guys think?

[jomeimei421]

Hello I finished ORV two days ago and it’s… a lot to digest… but I remember that I saw a long time ago the theory that YJH had written the epilogue, I didn’t even know orv then but it kind of stuck with me. Do you know this theory and what do you think about it? I need analysis of that novel 😵‍💫

All your art is lovely but the post-epilogue scene with yhk brought me back to life, thx so much for sharing those!!!!

Congrats! Or I’m sorry that happened 💔

Incidentally, I made reread guide for ORV if you’re interested! KDJ’s mother told him that the story changes even if the words don’t, so he should learn to “read again,” and fittingly, ORV completely transforms on second read. It will blow your fucking mind how much went right over your head the first time around

[major ORV spoilers below]

I think it’s pretty clear canonically that HSY wrote all of ORV and the epilogues, with the exception of possibly chapter 551.

Her plan to write ORV took place after the museum fight, and she intended to write everything up until the present as closely as possible and then tack on a fabricated ending where the Oldest Dream fragments imagine KDJ back to life.

The Star Stream system ends up failing with only that fabricated ending untransmitted, so YJH has a choice to either write it himself or not.

I think there’s a definite possibility that 551 was written by YJH, but you could also argue that 551 was written by Sing Shong, or that 551 was somehow written by HSY and altered by YJH, or HSY wrote it and sent it out later…

Ultimately ORV has a catch-all loophole to explain this kind of stuff which is that ORV only needs to operate by the laws and themes of the story. As long as it can hold your suspension of disbelief/convince you that something happened, then it happened. That’s how the time paradox existed in the first place, and how being the Oldest Dream works!

TL;DR, HSY wrote all of ORV except arguably 551. But honestly the logistics of the last chapter are kinda ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ and don’t matter as much as what it was trying to convey

[bluejaysandblackbats]

Lily of the Valley

Fandom: DC Comics, Batfam

Summary: Jason Todd dies and comes back to life. As the League takes him in, he navigates his morality and family values over the years.

Chapters: 32/?

Characters: Jason Todd, Talia al Ghul, Ra’s al Ghul, Damian Wayne, Barbara Gordon, Dick Grayson, Bruce Wayne, Sheila Haywood

Relationships: Jason Todd/Original Character(s)

Additional Tags: Immortal Jason Todd, League of Assassins Jason Todd, Protective Talia al Ghul, Good Parent Talia al Ghul, Jason Todd Needs a Hug, Good Sibling Jason Todd, Hurt/Comfort, Adopted Children, Resurrected Jason Todd

Chapter Thirty-Two: Louisiana Iris

Damian slept on the plane while Jason read in a low whisper next to him. “Jason, are you alright?” Talia asked. Jason nodded. “Can’t sleep?” 

“I can, but I want to make sure Di gets a few good hours in,” Jason replied. Talia smiled as she played with a strand of his hair. 

“You didn’t cut your hair,” Talia whispered. 

“I wanted you to be able to recognize me when I returned,” Jason answered. Talia smiled at him. “Why aren’t you asleep?”

“Because my oldest son is still awake… And I want to know what’s on his mind,” Talia replied, “Are you uneasy about the trip to Gotham?” 

“No… I’ll be with Damian. That changes things,” Jason answered. Damian rolled onto his side, pressing his face into Jason’s leg. 

The plane hit a little turbulence, and Jason rested a hand on Damian’s back. “This boy… Is he your boyfriend? Are you serious?” Talia asked. Jason nodded. “Tell me about him.” 

“He’s funny. He always wakes me up by telling me the specials. I slept in the living room most of my time there, so he’d walk over and give me his little chalkboard… And there was no skipping breakfast. He insisted on having breakfast with me… It was the only thing he ever insisted on… And his accent. Mama, when you hear him talk, it’s—. He’s so charming, Mama. And my heart, it longs for him.

“ I don’t understand how I could feel so tied to him. He’s so—. He’s ordinary. I could listen to him talk about anything. He makes it all feel interesting,” Jason smiled. Talia grinned. 

“He’s exciting and new… But it’s more than that. You see the life you dream of in him… And you love him for appreciating it,” Talia whispered. Jason smiled and nodded. 

Talia took Jason’s book and set it aside. “Mama—.”

“Rest,” Talia whispered. 

**

Upon their arrival in Houma, Jason carried Damian on his shoulders to his favorite restaurant. When they got to the door, he let Damian down, and Jason held his hand. Talia took pictures of the boys together. Jason approached the counter and said something in French to the cashier. “And don’t you tell him… I want it to be a surprise,” Jason whispered in English as he put a hundred-dollar bill in the tip cup. “Alright now, Marty.” Marty nodded. “We’re table seven by the back window.” 

Damian and Talia followed him, sitting politely at the table, and waiting for the waitress. “You know everyone in this place?” Damian asked. 

“Mhm… Some of them are nice,” Jason answered. The restaurant was dim and noisy, assaulting Damian’s senses. “Do you want to put the headphones on?” 

Damian shook his head. After twenty minutes, Josh walked over and set a platter down. “I don’t mean no harm, but—. I—. Jason, what are you—?” 

Jason stood up and embraced him. “I missed you every second,” Jason whispered, “This is my mother and brother.” 

Talia stood up and shook Josh’s hand. “Talia Head. Nice to meet you. Jason speaks so kindly of you,” Talia smiled. Josh grinned from ear to ear.

“And you even prettier than he says. He tell you my name. I bet he didn’t. I’m Joshua… Everybody call me Josh,” Josh introduced himself. 

Damian looked at Jason and said something in Chinese. “ You thought I was short ?” Josh chuckled as he replied in kind. Damian’s eyes widened. Jason chewed his lip, trying to hide a smile. “He say he love you more than anything in this world. Nice to meet you. I’m Josh.” 

“Damian,” Damian replied, “Where did you learn to speak Chinese?” 

“High school… And customers. You wait right here. Let me fix you something special,” Josh whispered. “Don’t go nowhere, now. This’ll be my last order before I clock out.” Josh hurried away. 

Jason smiled as he watched Josh walk away. Damian’s austere expression melted into an amused grin. “I like him,” Damian whispered. Jason leaned across the table and kissed his forehead. 

“He’s handsome,” Talia whispered as she made her plate. 

Jason made his plate and then Damian’s plate before digging in. Damian hesitated, knowing he didn’t usually like food away from home, but he took a bite for Jason’s sake. He immediately covered his mouth, staring at Jason with wide eyes. “What do you think?” Jason asked. Talia took a bite out of curiosity. 

“Impressive,” Talia whispered after she finished chewing. 

Damian couldn’t hide his smile as he ate. Jason laughed. “This is before he was trying to impress you. And trust me, he’s going to try to impress you,” Jason smiled.

Josh returned to serve dessert before clocking out and joining him with a plate of his own. “Hope y’all don’t mind. I ain’t ate since this morning,” Josh whispered. Jason touched a cord peeking from Josh’s shirt, and he pulled it out to reveal the protection charm. He smiled against Josh’s shoulder. “I promised you I wouldn’t take it off.” 

“You did. Thank you for keeping it on,” Jason whispered in his ear. Josh turned and kissed Jason’s forehead before returning to his dinner. 

Damian looked up from his meal to look at Josh. “Would you like my brother to come and live with you?” Damian asked. Jason almost choked, so he took a sip of his water to regain his composure. 

“He lived with me for a year… I think he’d be happy if he could have us all together. I want Jason to be happy. I know that’s what y’all want, too,” Josh answered, “I don’t think that mean he gotta exclude one for the other.”

“I agree wholeheartedly,” Talia whispered. 

**

Jason crouched at the foot of Josh’s bed, watching him get dressed. “I think Damian’s gon’ warm up to me… I gotta give him time,” Josh smiled, “Y’all carry yourselves with a lot of class… Not arrogance.”

“Josh?” Jason whispered. His eyes were soft and he let out a shaky breath. 

Josh stopped in front of him, blinking hard. “What’s wrong?” Josh asked. 

“I don’t know how to ask you for what I—.” Josh kissed him, and they fell back onto the bed. Jason giggled underneath him. 

“I been thinking about how to go about things better,” Josh whispered, “Maybe I should kiss you here.” Josh kissed Jason’s neck. “Or here?” Josh kissed behind Jason’s ear. “Tell me somethin’.” 

Josh climbed over Jason, pinning his hands. “Anything,” Jason whispered. 

“Were you lonesome for me?” Josh asked. Jason’s lips parted. “I love you.”

“I think about you every second we’re apart. I want you to come with me… I know you can’t right away, but—. Josh, if I’m in the same place with my brother for at least six months will you move there with me?” Jason asked. Josh’s eyes widened. 

“Call me crazy, but… Yeah. Hell yeah,” Josh laughed. Jason grinned and wrapped his arms around Josh’s neck. His arm traveled from the back of Josh’s neck to the necklace dangling between them. The one Jason asked him to wear. “When’d you make this for me?” 

“The day I returned to Houma. I figured that—. Even if you moved on, I figured I could still—. I could still see you and know that you were safe,” Jason whispered. Josh kissed Jason’s forehead.

[sirianasims]

Chapter 19

Insurrection - Part 1

Re: Application letter to Foxbury – Biology with elective in Veterinary Science

Dear Dr. Gilscarbo, PhD. It is with great pleasure that I submit my application for the distinguished degree in Biology at Foxbury University.

At present, I am finishing my studies at Newcrest High, and I have already secured several scholarships. My dream is to become a veterinarian and open my very own vet clinic. I feel that this would be the best way to combine my love for animals and my need to do good.

As you may be aware, my mother and father also both attended Foxbury in their youth. My mother went on to become a great astrophysicist, responsible for recently reestablishing direct contact with our neighbours on Sixam.

My father became a renowned lawyer. It is my firm belief that attending Foxbury will also put me on the path to greatness.

For this essay, I have chosen to illustrate how animals have made a great difference in my life. I do not believe that I would be who I am today without my beloved childhood dog, Maggie, and the other pets in my life.

To understand what Maggie meant to me, let me first take you back to my early childhood. When my grandfather died, my entire family was understandably distraught, and my parents decided to adopt a young pitbull from a shelter. The dog immediately sensed that I, a toddler at the time, needed her protection, and she was always by my side.

Maggie and I grew up together, and she became my trusty companion, sleeping next to my bed every night, and waiting for me when I came home from school.

She was also by my side on the night that changed both my life and Sixam relations forever.

I had gone to bed while my older brother was out with some friends, but I wasn’t asleep yet when I heard him come home. I also heard unfamiliar voices and my mother’s excited screams of disbelief.

I climbed out of bed, and went out in the hall, where I saw my parents and my brother – with two people I didn’t yet know.

Of course, my mother had told me about her adventures on Sixam, but this was their first visit back in over a decade.

After a brief introduction, my father tried to put me back to bed, but I couldn’t sleep.

I was scared because I knew that these people, who looked like my brother, could only have come to take him away.

My father tried to explain everything to me. He and my mother had been anticipating this for years.

He told me that Daniel’s biological father on Sixam was very ill and never had any other children.

It was important for my brother to go to Sixam and learn whatever he could while his father still lived, so he could take over his seat on the council.

As the first hybrid in a position of power at Sixam, my parents were worried for his safety, but his uncle, Tomnu, promised to keep him safe.

My mother, who had recently made the first breakthroughs in wormhole technology, suggested that she could go with them, to set up matching technology on Sixam, so direct communication, and perhaps later even travel, might become possible.

My father immediately asked to talk to her in private. He would not allow her to leave, and this was the first time I ever heard my parents have a serious fight.

I heard their loud voices through the wall, my father arguing that my mother couldn’t leave us, that he couldn’t lose her, and my mother crying, afraid to let her oldest son go alone. Again, Maggie comforted me.

I am happy that my mother decided to stay, and instead teach the Sixams as much as possible, so that they could set up the other portal on Sixam. If she had left, she might not have come back. My brother still has not.

beginning / previous / next

[yunacoeur]

the choices we make

our last dance: chapter iii

chapter synopsis: you, as the oldest royal child of your family, are up to take the throne. in your search for a partner to be consort, the royal family is throwing a party in your name for you to meet potential suitors.

look at me like i’m the only person in the room.

word count: 3.2k

a/n: i apologize this is kind of the filler chapter to get us to the climatic ending of the main story! so excited to show you chapter 4, but in the meantime: enjoy!

taglist: @en-ct @dimplewonie @cherriegyu @zerobaseonefics @haesunflower @shiningstar-byulxx @kpoprhia @harus-simp @taerrrrrae @zhanghaos-hairclips @big-uwu-stan @seok02 @kpop17 @quanrui-vamp @mins-fins @huipinkhair @beomibeom @wonluvrbot @gyuvinie08 @flwrinn @wigobkm @deadlycute-cutelydead @ladyestelleofthesea @aerzb1 if you’d like to be on the taglist please fill out this form!

you wake up the morning after, after having been right to assume you’d be restless. the whole night was spent thinking about all of them. you couldn’t eliminate a single one without some part of your brain begging you to reconsider. a small memory shard would be given to you every time you tried to eliminate them. a moment that made you like them.

and then you’d be back to square one.

gyuvin seemed younger, but he was charming in a youthful way. he still had all the stars in his eyes, while the others seemed to only have a few. he had beautiful dreams and ideas and you wonder if maybe, just maybe, you could run away with him. to a place where nobody knew either of you.

matthew was polite and kind and everything you expected in a partner. he’s practically perfect for you. he’s strong and saved you from so much embarrassment when you fell. he kind of felt like the hero you needed in life.

hao was someone who felt real. he felt genuine. you didn’t feel like royalty around him, you just felt like you were someone and he was someone and you were destined to fall in love. you could see it when you were deciding whether or not to dance with hanbin. he felt it too. he was comfort and protection and calm. maybe that’s what you need a little more of.

taerae, the hopeless romantic. god it felt like a typical romance straight out of a movie. what’s nice is that these kind of movies are predictable. there are no surprises, just a guy who falls helplessly in love with you by the end of the story. you could be the happy ending that romeo and juliet never got.

jiwoong is familiarity, and also unfamiliarity. he’s someone you’ve known for years, and also someone completely unknown to you entirely. and while you have spent this time not really knowing him, he has spent his time falling in love with you, to your surprise. he said he’s wanted to marry you all his life. maybe you could make his wish come true.

yujin is also familiarity, but in a different way. you could never marry that kid, but maybe you should consider the possibility of giving the position to him on paper so he could get the chance to rule like how he’s always dreamed of, and your real lover could be someone else behind the scenes. perhaps that is a good ending too, is it not? sacrificing everything so yujin gets a happy ending?

gunwook, the noble scholar, who gives meaning to the stars in the sky. he’s smart, effortlessly so, and he’s beautiful, adorable, sweet, etc. he could say there’s meaning in the most innocuous things and you would believe him. the sun is shining a little bit brighter today? it’s a sign that we’re meant to be together, shine together.

and ricky. a ghost of a presence. an orange rose hidden in the bouquet, waiting for you to search and rescue it. he’s a mystery, but as you think more about him, ask around more, you learn how sweet the people around him think he is. they compare him to a kitten. you’re not sure you see it.

—

the night is slowly coming to an end. you can feel it in the air.

you look for a place to rest your unconventional bouquet, finding an expensive vase resting on a podium in the center of the room. you assume it’ll do the job. you put them in the vase, adjusting them so each one stands out just a bit more. they look chaotic and mismatched together, but even still, they’re all reminders of the beautiful people you’ve met tonight. it would be a shame to hate them and their lack of uniformness.

your eyes search for suitors with flowers still in their suit pockets, a sign that you must still speak to them. one last suitor stands out to you. he’s tall and his hair is bleached blonde. he's wearing more modern styles of jewelry and makeup, he looks cool. trendy even. it means he doesn’t fit in super well with the rest of the crowd, but he also stands out. he is incredibly attractive and his modern look is not doing him any disservice. he’s quite beautiful. you make your way over to him, but as he sees you, he walks over to meet you in the middle.

he tells you his name, but you don’t quite hear him, “my name is ricky.”

“hi, ricky,” you say with a giggle. it’s weird that you feel so shy, but the way that he’s looking at you is making you question everything. his eyes are enchanting, but he’s a little more reserved than he seems from far away and he’s quieter than he seems as well. he hasn’t said anything this whole interaction besides his name.

that’s probably the only reason you can keep talking to him without getting flustered, “i saw you fall earlier. you were with another suitor, i believe? it was so shocking.”

“what do you mean?”

“well, so many people saw but you kinda fell into that guy’s arms so no one said anything,” he shrugs, “are you normally that clumsy?”

a part of you is screaming at yourself to recognize that he hasn’t addressed you respectfully this entire time and that he’s talking way too casually. the other is too charmed by him to really care about the disrespect.

“i-i guess so,” you murmur.

“you should be more careful,” he advises. you mumble out a shaky acknowledgment as he looks at his watch for the time.

“it’s getting late,” he comments, looking back up at you, “did you succeed tonight? did you find ‘the one’?”

a part of you wonders how he even knew of your worries about not finding ‘the one’. a part of you knows he could of overheard. it’s still shocking.

“i don’t know,” you say, and he shakes his head.

“no, i think you do,” he says in return. he’s serious, and the fact that he’s so self-assured makes you believe him just a bit.

you remember talking to a staff member earlier in the day, from a neighboring kingdom. they had sent a son of a powerful, wealthy duchess. they had called him something, an adoring nickname that didn’t make sense nor matter at the time, and now looking back on it you’re wondering how someone like this could be so adored and practically babied by the people around him.

but they definitely referred to him as the one with the blonde hair.

the nickname was something you could not remember, but you could never forget how highly they spoke of him, like he was the sweetest person they had ever met. like he was a teddy bear.

which was ironic because the guy in front of you doesn’t seem like that. maybe there’s more under the surface.

because he is definitely a softer guy than he’s letting on. he can hide it with his intimidating energy and mystery, but you can see it in his eyes, in the way he’s nervous fidgeting with his hands. he seems sweet under it all.

you try to talk to him more, but he almost seems to be rushing to run away, disappearing practically mid-conversation into the crowd. it’s disappointing, but you can finally seem to drag yourself out of the spell you seemed to be under while he was around.

and then it hits you, he never gave me a flower. as you realize it, you walk over to the vase in the center of the room where you had put the other flowers.

you find an orange rose hidden in the bouquet. there’s a note attached to it, taped to the thorny stem.

“remember me. ricky.”

the party has been over for a while now. not literally, you suppose, considering all the people still here. they won’t start to trickle out until you leave.

you retreat to the bar, hoping to find a certain comforting face once again. now that all the dancing has stopped, most of the guests are standing around, drinking, and chatting with their comrades. it may be hard to find the particular face you’re searching for.

and yet, right when you wanted him, he appears before you. it might just be magic.

“hello, stranger,” you say to him. your tone is much warmer and more fond than before. it has lost all sarcasm.

“didn’t i tell you not to call me that?” he replies as he turns to face you. it makes you smile knowing he recognized your voice, your teasing before he saw you. maybe he’d see the personality before the status, unlike so many people in your life, “are you doing alright?”

“yeah, why wouldn’t i?”

“i told you to come find me if you needed a break, so i had assumed-”

“don’t assume anything, dear stranger. i can’t only come to you during bad times. that is not love,” you say, reaching for his hand. he lets you take it and hold it in yours.

“my apologies, your highness,” he says with the most endearing smile.

“but unfortunately you were right,” you say, and he breathes out a laugh. it’s such inappropriate timing, but he can’t help it. you playfully glare at him and he rushes to defend himself.

“i’m sorry, i shouldn’t have laughed,” he says, “what’s wrong?”

you look away from him to gaze over the crowd, eyes wandering to your bouquet sitting gently in the center of the dancefloor. it stands out even more on its podium now that no one is dancing.

it’s an ominous thing. just sitting there peacefully, holding a representation of 8 different guys who offered to marry you, and also yujin, who you think forgot to give you the flower that was sitting in his pocket. you smile fondly at the thought.

out of all the possible thoughts to share with hao, you choose a very unspecific one, “i don’t feel right about any of this,” you say.

“what do you mean, your highness? the party?”

“this isn’t right, hao,” you whisper anxiously. even though he can tell you didn’t mean to say his name so casually, that it just slipped out without you noticing, he smiles. you’re already comfortable with him and that gives him peace, “i don’t feel good forcing people to perform and be the perfect candidate for my husband so i can find ‘the one’.”

“hey, don’t say that. you’re not forcing anyone,” he squeezes your hand to get your attention back on him. you seem distracted.

“i just- it all feels so wrong,” you say, and he heaves out a big sigh like he’s preparing to make a huge mistake.

he pulls you by your hand into him, his free arm wrapping around you as your head rests on his shoulder. he rests his head against yours, letting you relax and breathe before he says anything else.

“i’m sorry,” he whispers, “i’m sorry i keep doing things without asking you. i’m sorry i keep disrespecting you as the future monarch of this kingdom. and mostly i’m sorry that you feel like you’re the villain here.”

you’re not crying, because keeping in emotions is something you’ve been learning to do for years. god if you aren’t a little bit close.

“this should have been a cute story. a love story. finding your perfect match and having a perfect, happy ending,” he taps his hand against your back as a soothing motion, “instead you’re here feeling like you’re the bad guy, like you forced everyone here. that must feel horrible.”

“it does,” you whisper back.

he chuckles, and you feel the vibrations from his chest. his rhythmic heartbeat comforts you.

“i’m sorry, your highness. if it’s any comfort, i can assure you that no one you’ve met tonight feels forced to be here.”

“how would you know?” you mumble against his shirt.

“because i’m standing here with you. i could not imagine being displeased with your company,” he smiles, you can’t see it but you can hear it in his voice, “i could not imagine disliking you. i couldn’t even begin to describe what that would be like.”

you raise your head to look at him. his eyes are so intense, but they’re beautiful, burning into your soul.

“thank you, stranger,” you whisper to him with a giggle, and he scoffs, letting you go but still holding your hand.

“you’re never gonna let that go, are you?”

“i don’t think so,” you smile, and he smiles back.

“are you thinking of calling it a night soon?” he asks.

“yes, i think so. i am tired. i will think it all over in the morning,” you say, thinking of the restless night you are about to have. all those pretty smiles and charming personas. it will definitely take some time to decide who you’re going to marry.

“then i suppose this is goodbye until i see you again,” he sighs, and it feels tragic. there’s this heavy feeling on your soul, “whether i see you again as my fiance or as an ally, please know that i will always be here to be your peace, should you ever need me.”

“thank you, hao,” you tell him, before suddenly, you remember something, “oh, my, i almost forgot!”

he looks shocked for just a moment, “what? what is it?”

you look back at him, apologetic for getting up to leave so suddenly, “i promised something.. to someone.”

of course, you see in his eyes that he’s not fond of what you’re implying. he looks subtly upset like he’s hiding it well. maybe your heart likes that he already wants you to himself.

you don’t have to do it. you could stay with hao and be comfortable. he seems to be the only real person here. he’s sweet and charming. he’s a perfect bachelor.

but you see hanbin from across the room. his darling charming smile and his cheek dimples stand out the most. he is exciting, breathtaking, and it would be a crime to not dance with him at the very least one last time ( hopefully this isn't the last).

“stay with me,” hao says, tightening his grip on your hand. you stare at your hand being held in his, desperately holding on, “stay. please.”

“i promised him,” you whisper, looking up at him. something is going on inside his head, an emotion you can’t exactly pinpoint. you give one last look to hanbin, who at very long last makes eye contact with you. his eyes shine impossibly brighter, like he’s found what he’s been looking for.

hao sighs, “then go,” he changes his mind suddenly, and you turn back to face him, “no, really. go. dance with him. it’s okay.” it’s confusing and heartwrenching to see hao let you go like that. you know he hates the words leaving his mouth.

you mouth a simple thank you to him before running off to fall into the arms of your final dance partner of the night.

you get to him easily. he’s still just as effortlessly beautiful up close as you remember. he immediately reaches for your hand to hold. he’s warmer than zhang hao is. he’s not as soft spoken. he’s brighter. his grip is less gentle. so many little differences.

“hanbin,” you smile, and he smiles back. he adores how softly you say his name. it’s only been hours, but he thinks he’s ready to fall in love. it feels too fast and too quick, but he’s been preparing for this moment his whole life. considering he has no chance for his own kingdom's throne, marrying you would be fulfilling his destiny.

plus, he likes the way you look at him. he likes how clumsy you dance, it’s kind of charming. he likes how humble you are despite your position. he likes a lot about you already.

“will you join me?” he asks, but when your face falls just slightly, he gets concerned. he’s faulting just a bit, his hand retracting slightly. he’s worried that you’re giving him this last dance as a final goodbye, “what is wrong, your highness?”

“you’re asking for the… last dance,” you mumble, and before he has a chance to even respond to that, you wipe the sadness from your face and take his hand, “very well, i suppose i will join you.”

he’s slightly stunned, but he follows. he feels out of place for wanting to correct you. you haven’t given him the opportunity, but he still feels like he must. for your feeling’s sake.

“your majesty, i had asked for your first dance as a formality. and i had asked for your last dance out of avarice for your time, but if i'm being honest,” he says, his grip on your waist as you sway together making the moment even more intimate. god, he’s so close to you, you can feel the breaths he exhales on your skin, “i think i’ll need more than just those two.”

“yeah?” that, in all your dazed glory, was all you were capable of responding with.

“i would ask for all of them if that didn’t feel just a bit too greedy, your highness,” he gives you a goofy smile and it just all stops. time freezes for just a second.

you let it all go for a moment, just enjoying your last moments of the night with him. he decides to relax and enjoy these moments as well, twirling you around and smiling so endeared when you giggle. he might just be in love already.

you’ve gotten a little bit more bold since the first dance with him, and now that it is the last one, he happily lets you lead him around in your clumsy rendition of the graceful dance he had led you in earlier. he is so much better of a dancer than you are, but he’s patient with you. you step on his toes at one point, and you hurriedly apologize, but it doesn’t even matter to him. his expensive shoes are replaceable; this moment with you is not.

people who look on simply see you and him, giggling and laughing at your silly dance, holding onto each other for fear you’ll fall, and they must wonder if all these other suitors thought they even stood a chance.

“i have a request,” you say to him, “could you promise me this is not our last dance?”

he smiles so endearingly, “your highness, no matter what your answer is in the coming days, should you ever lend out your hand, i will reach for it. i will always twirl you around and dance with you, and we will come right back to this moment,” he says. it gives you comfort for a brief second before the anxiety of the question of who to pick comes back to you.

hanbin?

with his perfect smile and dimples, are you going to choose to spend your mortal life ruling a kingdom with sung hanbin by your side?

“thank you,” you say, pulling his hand close to your lips to kiss the back of it.

he shakes his head adorably, pouting, “oh, your highness, that should be me. i should be thanking you for your consideration and time-”

“hanbin,” you stop him, “thank you. i should go now, but i thank you for everything.”

the feeling of the kiss on his hand still lingers after you’ve left him there.

[litcest]

Historia Apollonii regis Tyri

The original source of this story is lost, but it’s believed to have been a Greek text originally composed Syria around the 3rd Century A.D., which was translated into Latin either or 5th or the 6th Century. This theorized Latin translation also would have changed passages such as the riddle spoken by Antiochus and perhaps the recognition scene between Apollonius and his daughter.

The story was so famous that 114 Latin manuscript survive to this day, as well as many vernacular ones. Few of those manuscripts are identical, and there tends to be two major versions, which scholars call RA and RB, with RB using a more classically correct Latin and having extra details and names, despite also being a shorter narrative.

It was translated to English as early as the 11th century, but the most diffused version was the one by John Gower in his Confessio Amantis of 1390. Other vernacular versions exists, such as the 13th Century Danish balled called Kong Apollon af Tyre; the Old Norse tale Thidreks Saga af Ber, which feature Apollonius as the son of King Arthur and the Spanish, and very Christianized, Libro de Apolonio, among many others. More famously, it was adapted by Shakespeare into the play Pericles, in 1609.

For Shakespeare's version of the story, please check my Pericles post.

Historia Apollonii regis Tyri, by Unknown

The story of Apollonius of Tyre begins with the titular hero visiting a land ruled by King Antiochus, who has an incestuous affair with his daughter. The daughter is said to have initially resisted his advances, even thinking of killing herself, before being persuaded to lay with her father by the maids.

Antiochus, perhaps to disguise his affair with his daughter, announced that only the one who can solde his riddle will marry the princess. All those who fail are beheaded. When it comes to Apollonius turn, he realises that the riddle is about the incestuous affair, and knowing that this knowledge would lead to Antiochus wanting him dead, Apollonius he runs from the kingdom. Indeed, Antiochus sends an assassin after him, which forcers Apollonius to leave Tyre, where he ruled.

He eventually arrives in Cyrene, where princess becomes so infatuated with him that they marry, despite Apollonius not being a king anymore. After the marriage, Apollonius learns that Antiochus and his daughter have been killed by a thunderbolt, and that the throne of Antioch is to be given to him.

He and his wife set off to claim the throne, but she seemingly dies during childbirth in a stormy night. Her corpse is put to the sea, and she is later found by a doctor and becomes a priest of Diana.

Apollonius, who is heartbroken, leaves his new-born to be taken care by foster parents, while he goes to Egypt trying to make money. When the daughter, Tarsia, gets older, the foster parents try to kill her, but instead of dying, Tarsia gets kidnapped by pirates and finds herself in a brothel, where a prince becomes enamoured with her.

Tarsia manages to leave the brother and become a musician. Apollonius hears of his daughter's death and becomes even more depressed. He goes to Mitylene where a friend of his hires a entertainer to cheer him up. The entertainer tells him of her sad story and is revealed to be Tarsia, his daughter. Then, miraculously, Apollonius receives a dream of his wife's location and the whole family is reunited.

This outline remains more of less consistent across the manuscripts, however, the reunion scene sometimes happens at the brothel, which Apollonius being an intended client of Tarsia before discovering that she's his daughter, which allows then to void incest. The theme of father and daughters (more specifically, how the fathers treat their daughters) is recurring through the play, with Apollonius and Antiochus being complete opposite.

Book VI, Chapter VIII of Carmina, by Venantius Fortunatus

Composed in the second half of the 6th Century, this is the oldest known mention of Apollonius, merely citing him as someone who survived a shipwreck. No mention is made of Antiochus or his daughter. However, the casual mention of Apollonius’ name indicated that the audience would have been familiar with the his tale.

Gesta Apollonii

This version is in metric verse and probably dates to the 10th Century. The text only goes as far as the 8th chapter (out of 51), which is shortly after Apollonius flees Antioch, which means this is the oldest mention of Antiochus committing incest with his daughter.

And those passages don't paint a consensual relationship. One part says "he violated the virgin with his raging lust" (The original verb here, rumpit can be translated in many ways, due to sexual context of the passage, I chose 'violate'), and later that "because of the wicked act committed there, the bed was left polluted."

Pantheon, by Godfrey of Viterbo

The version in Pantheon, from the 12th Century A.D. Missing from this edition is the riddle that Apollonius solves (he merely gives the answer to it) and much of Tarsia's adventure (such as the scene of her pleading for her innocence at the brothel). Godfrey also places the story in a historical context, allegedly having happened after the death of Alexander the Great, but before the Punic Wars.

Once again, the daughter of Antiochus is described as distraught over the situation she finds herself with her father.

Apollonius of Tyre, Book VIII of Confessio Amantis, by John Gower

Confessio Amantis is a extremely long poem written between 1386 and 1390 by John Gower. The poem is a frame narrative, with an old man telling the many stories to a priest of Venus. None of the stories featured in it are original works of Gower, with the majority of them coming from Ovid.

Apollonius of Tyre shows up in Book VIII, which concerns itself with the sin of lechery (lust), and more specifically, with incestuous lust. 

This story also goes with the rape version, with the introduction saying (in Latin, because people on the 1390′s were pretentious like that and everything had to have an introduction in badly written Latin):

“Here he speaks against incestuous coitus of lovers, and narrate the marvelous example of the Great King Antiochus, who after his wife died, violated his own daughter […]”

The Pattern of Painful Adventures by Laurence Twine

This version was written by Laurence Twine in 1576, and is mostly a English translation of Gower’s version in Confessio Amantis. It seems to be the version from which Wilkins drew inspiration, for the text closely resembles his. In this version, Antiochus also rapes his daughter.

“Wherefore not long after on a certain day he came into his daughter’s chamber, and, bidding all that were there for to depart as though he had had some secret matter to confer with her, the furious rage of lust pricking him forward thereunto, he violently forced her – though, seely maiden, she withstood him long to her power – and threw away all regard of his own honesty and unloosed the knot of her virginity.”

The riddle Apollonius has to solve is different, with the version from Pericles likely having been altered by Shakespeare. 

“I am carried with mischief; I eat my mother’s flesh; I seek my brother, my mother’s husband, and I cannot find him.”

In this version, the King and Princess are also killed by lightning: “King Antiochus and his daughter are struck dead with lightning from heaven.”

References:

Archibald, Elizabeth. Apollonius of Tyre : Medieval and Renaissance Themes and Variations: Including the Text of the Historia Apollonii Regis Tyri with an English Translation. D.S. Brewer / Boydell & Brewer, 1991.

[highwaytothedangerzone502]

Foxtrot Alpha Alpha - Chapter 25

Pairing: Hangman x Female OC

Word Count: 1859

Warnings: Talk of death

Summary: Hangman learned his lesson a long time ago to never show his true feelings when someone's words or actions hurt him. To do so showed weakness that could be exploited, and Seresin men couldn't show weakness. Of course, there was an exception to every rule, and Jake's always came in the form of women, three in particular: his mom, Juliette Kazansky, and the girl whose name he could no longer bring himself to speak. She was the girl that got away; she was his biggest 'what if' and his biggest regret; she would forever be the ghost that haunted his dreams. Jake believed that's where she'd stay, for he would surely never see her again after what he did.

Or so he thought.

Notes: This is the sequel to India Lima Yankee; I'm using the same callsign for the Female OC as in Ghost Story because I just really like it, but they are different characters; chapters in italics are flashbacks.

Also sorry for the delay in posting this. I've been trying to update other stories, and I'm in the middle of moving, so updates might be spotty for a bit :(

Chapter Songs: 'Tis the Damn Season Speakers Bleachers & Preachers

****

Hangman

Charlotte Blackwood had aged gracefully, but the fine lines of her wrinkles did not detract from her beauty, nor did she act like she'd gotten older. Despite her grief, Charlie greeted Hangman with a big smile and an even bigger hug.

"It's so nice to see you," she said, pulling away. "I wish I was getting to see you under happier circumstances." 

"Me too, ma'am," Jake replied. "Whatever y'all need from me, I'm here." 

Charlie glanced over her shoulder at her daughters, who were still hugging each other. "You supporting Ghost is all I need. Thank you for coming with her." 

"Of course. I wanted to be for you, too. You and Nathan treated me more like a son than my own dad ever did, especially after my mom died." Hangman rubbed the back of his neck, suddenly embarrassed. "I'll, uh, I'll get Ghost's suitcase to her room, and then I'll let y'all be." 

Charlie's brow furrowed. "Where are you going?" 

"I need to find a hotel and-" 

"Aren't you staying with us?" 

"I didn't want to assume-" 

Charlie shook her head. "No, no, you're not staying at a hotel. Your room is all ready for you."

Hangman thought back to the guest room he'd crashed in for the last few weeks he'd had in Texas before heading to the Naval boot camp with Ghost. He'd made that place his temporary home after his mom's death and his father's harsh words and instruction not to return home for the rest of the year. It was the same room that Hangman used when he returned for Christmas and summer "break," both that year and the subsequent years. The Blackwoods had all but adopted him, and those had been some of the happiest years of his life. 

"Thank you, ma'am," he managed to say, surprisingly overcome with nostalgia. Grabbing his and Ghost's suitcases, he lugged them inside and upstairs to their respective rooms. Hangman chose to stay in his and unpack to allow the Blackwood women to catch up and privately mourn over the loss of Nathan. He turned on some quiet country music and slowly started taking things from his suitcase and putting them into the dresser drawers. To his surprise, some of his old clothes remained in there. They would hardly fit him now, but the sight of it still warmed his heart. Charlie had held onto them even after all this time...

Once he finished unpacking, he lay on top of the bed covers and scrolled through his contacts, hovering over his oldest brother's number. Did he dare call him and let Matt know he was in Texas? Hardly five minutes away? That he'd willingly come for a girl who hadn't spoken to him in years but hadn't had the guts to visit his brother despite Matt's obvious attempts to repair their fractured relationship? What about his niece, Sophie? An innocent caught in the crossfire of Jake's complicated feelings about his family?

"There you are," Ghost said softly from his doorway. "You okay?"

Hangman sat up. "Yeah, I'm good," he lied, figuring Ghost had enough on her mind. She didn't need to hear his problems. "How are you holding up?"

"I don't know. Part of me is fully aware he's not coming back, but the other part, it's like the reality hasn't set in. I walked past his office earlier and expected to see him sitting there working, but it was empty."

"It takes a while to come to terms with it," Hangman said empathetically, standing up and shoving his phone and hands into his jeans pockets. "You always saw him working in his office whenever you were home, so that habitual motion of looking into his office is still there even if he's not, so you're still going to react to it."

"Did you-"

"Do the same? Yeah. I remember texting my mom a few times out of habit with some nonsense thing that I thought was a big accomplishment. I'd only realize she wouldn't respond after I hit send."

"When did you stop?"

"It took a couple of months. Matt used to do the same, apparently."

"Speaking of Matt, did you tell him you're here?"

Either Ghost realized that's what Hangman had been contemplating in bed when she walked in, or she had uncanny timing with her question. Regardless, his answer was the same. "No. I'm here to support you, not navigate my own family drama."

"Don't stop yourself from seeing him on my account if you want to. If you do choose to see Matt, I'll support you, too."

"But you're grieving-"

"You came here for me. Let me be there for you when you need it. That's what friends do, Jake, no matter the circumstances."

The corner of his lip tugged upward. "Forever?"

"And always," Ghost responded without skipping a beat. "I'll even go with you to see him if you want."

"No, no, that's too much."

"As much as buying my plane ticket to come down here?"

Shit. Sheepishly, he asked, "How long have you known?"

"Figured it out right before I came up to find you for dinner. I checked my account balance to see what damage the flight had done to it and saw nothing," Ghost said as she closed the distance between them. She reached up and hugged him tightly, and Hangman could've sworn she melted into him when his arms snaked around her waist. With tears in her voice, she whispered, "Thank you, Jake. That was too much but very, very much appreciated."

"You had enough going on; I thought I could take something off your shoulders by paying for it. After all-" Hangman pulled away just enough to look at her, but kept his hands on her waist- "burdens aren't meant to be carried alone."

Ghost chuckled softly. "Throwing my saying back in my face, I see."

"You're good at coming up with catchy ones." They smiled at each other, and he watched Ghost's eyes flick briefly down to his lips. She opened her mouth and-

"Annalise? Where are you?" Jackie's nearby voice caused them to jump apart hastily lest they be caught in a questionable embrace. Ghost strode into the hallway with Hangman on her heels. Jackie spotted them when she exited her sister's room. "What do you two want for dinner?"

"Why don't I pick something up?" Hangman offered, moving toward the stairway. The girls followed. "That way, none of you have to cook."

"You've had a long day of traveling. We can order in and-" The ringing doorbell cut Jackie off. The group shared bewildered looks, wondering who would be here since none of them had been expecting company. Hangman gathered his wits first and moved forward, answering the door. A familiar man and little girl stood with a casserole dish in hand. The two men blinked in shock at each other. With no small amount of disbelief, Hangman managed to say, "Matt?"

"Jake?" his brother responded in equal confusion.

The little girl in Matt's arms gasped and excitedly asked, "Jake? Like Uncle Jake?!"

"And you must be Sophie," Ghost said, coming to stand beside Hangman with a gentle smile on her face, saving both men from the awkward silence settling between them. She knelt in front of the girl and added, "Your Uncle Jake has told me so much about you!"

Sophie's eyes lit up, causing Hangman's heart to sink. He had told Ghost nothing about his niece except her name, but the idea of him- a man she had never met- talking about her to other people clearly meant the world to Sophie. "Really? Like what?"

"Well, let's see, he said you like horses and that you've just started learning how to ride. You also really love music and are trying to learn the guitar."

"Yeah! I'm not good at the guitar, though. I'm better at the horse riding," Sophie admitted bashfully while Hangman stared at Ghost in a stupor, wondering how the hell she'd known more about Sophie than he did.

"If you're anything like your uncle, you'll get there in no time." 

"I hope so!" Sophie tilted her head. "Who are you? Are you Uncle Jake's girlfriend?"

"I'm Annalise. I'm a pilot like your uncle." Ghost straightened and turned her attention to Matt. "How are you doing?"

"Uh, good, good," he replied, regaining his composure. "When did y'all get in?"

"About an hour and a half ago. It was a last-minute trip due to the circumstances."

"I see, I see. Well, uh, we heard about your dad and wanted to bring you a casserole for dinner. We're so sorry for your loss. Melissa sends her condolences as well. She has a cold; otherwise, she would be here, too."

Jackie stepped forward and took the dish from him. "Thank you, that's very kind of you. You truly had impeccable timing with this. We were just trying to figure out what we were going to do for dinner. And we hope Melissa feels better!"

Matt offered her a small smile, but his gaze continued to revert to Hangman. "Thank you. I'm glad we could be of help. If y'all need anything else, please let us know. Annalise, Jackie, good to see you. Jake, we'll talk soon?"

Hangman nodded, unable to find his voice. He was mortified his brother found out about him being here like this.

"Daddy, I don't want to leave yet!" Sophie protested, grabbing her dad's hand. "Can we please stay?"

Matt picked her up and said, "Not tonight, sweetheart. The Blackwoods and your Uncle Jake are going through a tough time right now because they lost someone very important to them. Another time, okay?"

Hangman opened his mouth to invite them in, but then he remembered this wasn't his house, and the decision ultimately lay with Ghost and her family. He looked down at Annalise, and a mutual understanding passed between them.

"Actually, we would love to have the company," Ghost said kindly. "It'll be a nice distraction, and I don't think any of us can say no to Sophie's plea to hang out with her uncle. Y'all are more than welcome to have dinner with us."

"Please, Daddy?" Sophie begged, clasping her hands in prayer in front of his face. "Please, please, please?"

Matt sighed in defeat. "All right. I'll call Mommy and let her know we'll be late coming home."

Sophie cheered and reached out eagerly for Hangman. He hesitated only a fraction of a second before taking her out of her dad's arms and holding her himself. Grinning at her, Hangman said, "It's an honor to finally meet you, Sophie."

She threw her tiny arms around his neck. "I'm so happy to meet you!"

"I'll be in shortly. Just going to call Melissa and let her know we'll be home late," Matt informed, taking out his cell phone. Hangman nodded but said nothing, choosing to enter the kitchen with Sophie to get away from his older brother because they would be talking tonight, whether Hangman wanted to or not, and the more he looked at Matt, the more the reality settled in, and it terrified him.

****

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[thedawningofthehour]

SORRY FOR THE LONG ASK but you activated my sleeper agent rottmnt brainstorming Re: The Video Game Question

Raph: would probably like low strategy single player games and lean toward arcade/motion control based experiences because they present a way around the "Hand Too Big Controller Too Small And Breakable" problem. As an Oldest Sibling (speaking from an Oldest Sibling Gamer pov) he would have been the Designated Single Player Driver (I have a vivid mental image of Raph playing old c tier single player wii games like My Sims Kingdom while Mikey, Leo, and Donnie yell instructions at him) and I think he's still gravitated towards those kinds of games. He also feels like the kind of guy who will thoroughly enjoy every video game he plays but his favorite is still inexplicably just like. Uno for the ps3

Leo: Would like competitive games. I feel like he's the kinda guy who cannot bring himself to give a shit about the story or aesthetics of a game and cannot care at all about single player video games outside of speedrunning or something. The point of games for him Is To Win. I feel like him and Donnie both played CSGO or COD at a young age with voice chat and thats why they are who they are. His favorite game is probably a competitive hero shooter or smth. He probably is playing Valorant as we speak.

Donnie: I feel like he's the only one who is a Capital "G" Gamer. Has the broadest taste but tends to like games he can "lose himself" in. (Competitive shooters, MMOs, lengthy and intricate single player games IE: Dark Souls or Elden Ring, metroidvanias, RPGs, fighting games) If the taste of Donnie Gamer Mode we get in the show is anything to go by, he seems the type to obsess over a game for like a month, beat it 120%, probably achieve some level or speedrunning or competitive infamy and then drop it completely never to be seen again.

Mikey: Would love sandbox games for Sure. Plays Minecraft but only on creative mode. Will play sims but only with cheats to make super intricate mansions or crazy houses or recreate something he saw in a movie once. He would 100% play single player games his brothers already beat so he can look around at the scenery and mess around in a character creator. Will play an open world game and never do a single main story mission and call it quits when he gets bored.

They've all 100% played a bunch of really weird and bad shovelware games or really cheap 3rd party titles because they were what Splinter could get for them. They all have 10 to 15 mobile idle games they'll rotate out bc they all need to be Stimulated at All Times. Yes they have played Mario Party and Killed Each Other over it but more importantly they have played Dokapon Kingdom and have started rivalries that have lasted several months over this game. They will hold grudges til they die over this game. They have never gotten to the end screen of this game and in all likelihood, never will.

Idk maybe my vibes are off tho lol but can you tell I've thought about this a lot to my own detriment

There's actually a point in the next book-I think it's in chapter 1 but I can't remember-where Galois mentions giving Raph one of Draxum's oversized keyboards when he has to do anything on the computer. (Draxum has large-print keyboards because he's Old) I think I've mentioned that the boys all have larger-than-normal phones because they only have the three fat fingers and that's just not gonna work with a standard iPhone. Raph I feel like is basically Strong from Fallout 4:

(bless him)

I'm reminded of when my sister would sit and watch my play Dream Life to 'learn', until I moved it into my own room. Really, their first console was probably 'whatever Splinter found in a dumpster and still worked', so unless it was something with connected controllers they were probably playing off whatever controllers he'd found as well, so it's entirely possible they legit just had the one controller for awhile. And yeah, they all crowd around to watch Raph play because that's annoying little sibling behavior.

Mikey would love games where the goal is to Make Something. He doesn't care about winning, only stepping back and looking at the finished product and going "nice." I do feel like he'd actually play the sims though-the twins use it as a building simulator, but he'd absolutely get into the lives and stories of his sims. He builds too, but he also gets into creating the sim. He plays Fallout 4 with the Sim Settlements mod and never finds Shaun because all he's doing is building shacks for farmers.

Oh, Leo is absolutely in it to win it. In any way, if it has a score he can use to compare to Donnie's he loves it. The sole exception to this is city builders, I can absolutely see him sinking days into Cities Skylines creating elaborate planned cities with complicated mass transit and beautiful walking spaces.

The other exception is if he can fuck around in a game and be chaotic. He plays Skyrim and installs the sex mods not because he's horny, but because he thinks going around in this incredibly inappropriately horny fantasy world is hysterical. He uses it more as a Medieval Life Simulator and if he completes a quest it's entirely by accident.

Donnie is absolutely the worst gamer and will learn literally everything there is about the game after playing it through once. He also probably mods his games, or even makes his own mods. Some of them to make everything look cooler or add quality of life and immersion stuff in, but he'll also do stuff like install the mod that replaces the Skyrim arrow noises with a man going "pew!"

Omg they absolutely played knock-off games as kids. They probably lied to Mikey about them being off-brand so he didn't feel bad about their situation, telling him that the title was a misprint and all the ads for the actual game were lying.

[llostwriter]

The Misery of the Songstress’ Child

Chapter 8: The oldest dragon of the trio

[word count: 2398]

Any gender

Field of a Thousand Dreams was enveloped in Haitang flowers. The haitang flowers represent innocence and purity, and this field is a place where dreams can take root and grow. It was known throughout the cultivation world that the second lord has a liking for Haitang flowers. If only they knew the origin of it. The second monarch has spent some of their free time tending to the field, especially after the death of Chu Fei.

One could connect the dots and realize that Haitang flowers were not actually the second ruler’s favorite, but Chu Fei’s. But nobody does that since there was no need for it. If even the first emperor wouldn’t care about the concubine’s liking, why should the others care? It was pointless.

One man stood in the field of haitang flowers. His attire was a rich black robe with gold and silver accents. He stood silently in the field; the color of his clothing was completely out of place with the gentle pink scenery.

He tilted down his head as he stared at the coffin. In spite of his indecent history with an ancestor of this decrease, he has grown some affection for this decrease. Ever since they were kids, he has been watching them from afar. Away from view. The only difference this time was that he was here in his physical form, not his spiritual one.

“You were a fool like she was.” He has succeeded, yet he couldn’t feel happy at all.

Now that Wanyu stood in front of the coffin, memories began flooding in. He was the firstborn son of the dragon king in the eastern sea. The Dragon Kings are separated into four categories. Northern, western, eastern, and southern.

His father, Wanli, and his mother, Linyu, are all part of the pure dragon bloodline, for their blood wasn't dirtied with another species. Wanli and Linyu have three dragons, two males, and a daughter. First Wanyu was born, the second was Wangyue, and the last was Linyi. Wanyu and Wangyue inherited most of their father’s appearance, contributing to their name, including “Wan.” Linyi inherited their mother’s seductive red iris, giving her “Lin.”

Due to Wanyu being the oldest, he was selected to become the next dragon king after his father’s death. With that, he was put on a stricter protocol than the rest of his siblings. “A king should not make any mistakes.” His shoulders were piled up with responsibilities; he became held accountable for any mistakes that his siblings made. Forced to spend the majority of his time inside the study hall. He read all types of literature, took all types of tests, and learned all the martial arts that are required, if not more. He never has time to bother himself with any mortal problem.

Wangyue, his younger brother, was different from Wanyu. Wangyue has the habit of sneaking into the mortal realm, at every chance that they get. Ever since his birth, Wangyue has always been fascinated by mortals, no matter how many times he gets told that mortals are inferior, lower creatures. All dragons have a human form, and with that ability, he took advantage of that. Wangyue would collect all the mortal scraps that he found fascinating and give them to Wanyu or Linyi.

“Gege! Check these out!” Wangyue came back with a large bag hunched over his bag, in his human form, grinning from side to side like a cheeky little bastard as he poured all the items from the bag onto the floor.

The moments got Wanyu thinking of how he could even be related to such an idiot. Even though Wangyue is a dragon, he clearly doesn’t have the persona of one!

Foreseeably, he took a step backward. Only for Wangyue to take a step forward.

…

The child turned to see Wanyu as the pure blooded dragon in his human form sauntered out of the shadows, his black clothes afluttering and a traditional fan in hand.

“Great Uncle!” Delighted, the child scrambled forward and attempted to hug Wanyu, only for it to fail miserably due to the child’s small size. For the first time in a while, Wanyu didn’t step back to dodge his little nibling. His black robe following behind him, he didn’t respond at all to the greeting.

“Uncle?”

He snapped out of his stance, trying to hide the sorrow under a smile, “Let’s meet Mister Mo.”

…

He was the companion to Xun Fengruo’s child. Xun Fengruo was a part of the Butterfly-Boned Beauty Feast, yet she has no clue, nor did the mother, who was also one. Only without knowing the truth could they live a good life. Xun Fengruo’s mother found her true love; Xun Fengruo did as well.

But that wasn’t the reason; he was not at all interested in a demon race that has already been kicked out of the demonic realm. The main reason was because Xun Fengruo and the ones following was related to his sister, Linyi.

Linyi dirtied her dragon bloodline by getting pregnant by a Butterfly-Boned Beauty Feast. Dragons are one of the closest mythic creatures to heaven, and especially with the whole war between the heavens and Butterfly-Boned Beauty Feast, it was best for the dragon race or any races that have a relationship with the heavenly realm to avoid contact with any Butterfly-Boned Beauty Feast.

As much as the dragon race wanted to scoff when the news that 33 heavenly officials couldn’t even defeat one calamity reached their realm, they didn’t want to be caught up in the drama that Heaven created. In fact, they wanted to stay completely neutral. And by interacting with any enemies of heaven, they might also be marked as a comrade of the enemy side.

At that time, Wanyu didn’t understand why she would do something like that; she was younger than the rest of his siblings, but even despite that, she was known to be the silent type.

Her persona didn’t match her later actions. Every time that the topic of sex was brought up, she always acted like a blushing maiden. She has many other dragons trying to court her; however, she always rejects them with an embarrassed smile. It was unexpected for her to even have intimacy with anyone, much less have a child with them. But in the whole life span of 900 years, she changed a lot, to the point that neither of her dragon brothers even recognized her, if not for the looks that she kept and matured through the centuries.

Linyi ended up dying and leaving her child behind, with the father nowhere to be found. Wangyue brought many treasures that he found in the mortal realm to that child, showering the child with affection through his gifts and loving the times that the child calls him Wang-shushu. Giving headpats every chance he gets. He truly grew a fondness for children; however, he was not at all interested in having a female romance partner.

To which Wanyu felt some sort of reassurance upon knowing that. He told himself that the reason was because children are annoying. They cry all the time. He doesn't have time to take care of them. If Wangyue were to have children, it was without a thought that he'd be a terrible parent. Wanyu wouldn’t even be surprised if Wangyue taught his child to jump into a vertex just for the thrill of it. A dragon’s scale is strong enough to withstand the pressure of anything; it was the hardest part of the dragon race, protecting the dragons from any physical damage.

But honestly, the dragon race doesn't need any more idiotic people.

—-

Due to Wanyu’s future of becoming the next dragon king, he was forced into an engagement with the dragon crown princess of the west, Xiang. Xiang was a slender, tall, and elegant woman having a fair and aloof face. She was said to be the perfect match for Wanyu, according to the merfolks and the other officials of the seas. Wanyu and Xiang have the same personality. The unwillingness to socialize with others. The purpose of this marriage was so that he, the next dragon king, could continue the pure dragon bloodline of the eastern seas. As well as to improve the relationship between the eastern and western sea.

Wanyu has no choice but to agree to the arrangement of his parents. But one thing he would never forget was the wedding night.

He stood there dressed in the most luxurious red robes with real gold used to create the dragon symbol on the back and more golden patterns on it. The marriage was held in the middle of the eastern and western seas. The buildings and decorations were placed, expensive-looking.

Red fabrics were decorated from bottom to top. Even a year before the marriage started, the merfolk, his parents, and everyone he knows was all waiting for the event.

He hesitantly entered the room, knowing that he'd have to consummate the marriage ceremony because he didn’t have a choice. He looked at Xiang; everyone told him that she was beautiful, yet he couldn’t feel any attraction toward her. He was about to strip off his outer robes before Xiang stopped him.

“I’m not interested. I advised you to be fully clothed as I already have a partner.”

She already has a partner? Then why did she even agree to this marriage?

Wanyu’s mind was crowded with all those questions; it didn’t make it better as he has low wine tolerance and the two cups of wine that he has to drink as a respect to both sides’s parents were getting to him. He was starting to have a headache, and all he wanted was to quickly get this over with.

“What do you mean by that?” He asked her, wanting her to provide him with a direct answer.

Of course, she didn’t disappoint him and told him that they didn’t have to engage in any sexual activity; all they have to do is act like a couple when they’re outside.

It took a couple of minutes for the alcohol in his system to eliminate itself, but once it was gone, he realized that some perverted merfolk were attempting to listen in to the sounds of the sexual activities between the two royalties. Even though the closed door was between them, the merfolks could feel the tension of somebody staring intently at them, and in the end they ran away.

With the irritation gone, leaving only Wanyu and Xiang.

He has the urge to ask her, Who was the fortunate man that caught even the crown princess’s attention? But he decided to keep it to himself as it was none of his business.

Wanyu still has to stay with Xiang, pretending that he is close with Xiang. During his stay, he realized that Xiang has been visiting a female from the human tribes. He connected the dots and came to the conclusion that she is interested in females. Something that is forbidden in the traditional ways.

He reminded Xiang that humans couldn’t live for a long time, and she should just find another female partner if she’s interested in the same sex. He didn’t have any issues with people marrying the same gender, but something about them being in love with another race just sets him off.

The idea of somebody dirtying their own race was qualified as a crime. He was disgusted by even the thought of it. It made it worse when it reminded him of Linyi. His sister. He still has yet to realize why she would do such a thing. Why would she commit such treason? Because of her, he has to cover up her mess for her. He has to make sure that nobody else knows about the existence of the child.

He even has to go through the trouble of wiping off and changing Wangyue and the child’s memories. Wangyue proves to be a struggle since their spiritual force is about the same range, so he couldn’t fully wipe off Wangyue’s memory. The only memory of the child that Wangyue has left was him playing with a little friend, but he completely forgot the little friend’s appearance. Wangyue asked Wanyu; however, Wanyu pretended that he never met the kid.

Wangyue ended up placing his nibling into Mo Qingchi’s care.

His foolish younger brother began asking any kids that he found if they were the ones that he was looking for.

To the first stranger kid that Wangyue asked, the kid lied to the dragon. After all, who wouldn't want to be friends with the knowingly high and mighty creature? Wangyue didn’t ask any further and chose to believe that random child.

Wanyu didn't bother correcting him after all, as long as his brother continued to act like an idiot. His younger brother wouldn't be in his way.

- The oldest took all the responsibilities and fixed the mistakes of the younger ones.

- Wanyu has his own reasons for why he picked Mo Qingchi.

- Mo Ran reminds Wanyu of Wangyue.

- The matter of Linyi still remains unknown.

- The parents of Wanyu and Xiang became suspicious since dragons are meant to be one of the most fertile creatures. Yet still no grandkids. Wanyu and Xiang know that. They don't have much time. But they’ll enjoy their freedoms while it lasts.

-After Taxian-Jun’s death, Xue Meng watched as his master turned into ashes before his eyes. Remembering you, he ran to your coffin only to realize that he was also too late. [clarification: the person in the first scene wasn’t Xue Meng]

- In both fanfics, Xue Meng has witnessed a pile of ashes.

- The sword that you obtained in your first life was named Yongbu, as in Yǒng bù(永不)—never. Never have any regrets. The ironic part is that the name’s meaning never gets fulfilled.

- Haitang flowers could also mean “bitter love," "unrequited love," or "tragic love."

- Wanyu’s main purpose will be revealed in the future chapters.

- Wanyu is a century apart from Wangyue’s birth. Two centuries apart from Linyi's birth. Making him around 1100 years old.

Side notes: I didn’t specify the gender of Linyi’s child(nibling) since I’m planning to make a Yuwu reader-insert fanfic. Which might take a long time since I’m already quite behind on my two fanfic publications. Busy. Slow updates.