#the camerawork is genuinely painful

[ultttraswag]

getting through supernatural season 13 is an exercise in will

[casually-slips-into-coma]

spoilers for iwtv s2e5!!!

initial thoughts throughout:

dubai armand in this ep specifically seems a lot happier than normal. very smiley and kind of excited? like more energy than usual. mans was ready to eat

this fucking turtleneck

loumand library dates

hypnotized security as one does

i like that armand likes to hunt his kills. thought it was a cool detail

made me think of when armand tells daniel to run in the book

daniel was there for gay sex the drugs were just a bonus

he barely registered the coffin. he was like ok ig

the zodiac killer lol

daniel struggling to get the tape out of the plastic lmao

some coke for the gums just in case

you were lonely louis (gagged him)

the extreme change in vibe from daniel shitting himself about louis being a vampire to him laughing along while louis complains about his ex

book quotes!!

daniel validating louis complaining about lestat. theyre just gossiping at this point

BIG time asshole

daniel making A Point and then going sorry and louis saying no,,,,,that🫵was astute🗣🗣

“can u do the fang thing again? i love that, man” hes just like me fr

dangerously unstable psyche ((clocked))

im kinda with her get off that bench brother😭 [about claudia leaving]

jacob the actor you are

ok this whole argument between louis and armand was insane and i replayed it like a million times

kinda love louis coked tf out

being called boring fucking hurts thats a wild argument

he called you a soft beige pillow suffocating him girl u gotta stand up

armand really locked on to the word fascinating

louis said lick my boots😝

gremlin sighting👀

“chop my hands off”👀👀👀👀

picking LINT❓❓off the sofa⁉️ ⁉️

armand mocking him “oh its so hard to be me, its so hard to kill humans, i can feel her feelings as i drain her, louis de point du lac, everyone i know wronged me!”

imitating each others accents

my vampire daddy groomed me into a little bitch holy fuck when they go low i go lower

THE NAME!! the name!! unuttered in our home for 23 years said over and over again until it was pounding in my brain like a hammer!!!!

assad deserves every award my man was actiiiinnggg

she didnt love you/i know

louis :(((

“can u hear her? shes calling me…” ok what if i kms

and then louis runs into the sunlight🙃

hello loml: practical effects

sidestep the big picture get the story straight first daniel said lets lock the fuck in rn we gotta focus

“you said the worst things youve ever said to me” hes just a sopping wet cat

hes fine youre fine this is fine youre all fine

finally seeing unhinged armand ive prayed for times like these

i stand by my cancelled wife btw

small detail of different memories: in louis’ version he apologizes to armand and armand says “meaningless word” and then moves on to talk about the slanted floor. in daniel’s version he remembers the dead guy and the same scene plays out except armand explains he killed the neighbor in between “meaningless word” and how the floor is slanted

vibrating eyes

LOVING how this episode is shot. all the different angles and the camerawork and the fucking MUSIC

canon that louis fucks guys and then kills them fic writers get to it

“128 boys hes brought here—“ “he said it was 5🥺”

daniel basically saying look man ill suck ur dick if u let me go

and then armand making him kneel

armand so unnerving <3

i know its kinda dumb to point out but i love small details of vamp power. specifically how armand picked up that table like it weighed nothing and when he picked up louis

love the idea of louis being like ok just put your feet in the rocks itll help

sopping wet cat armand!!!

but also he really let louis suffer for days instead of just giving him blood to ease the pain😬

lestats voice caught me off guard genuinely

interesting that armand knows where lestat is. i wonder how the show is gonna go about it. is he in the ground??

and refusing to pass along the i love you message……….theres layers here

u left me for death :((

have i atoned for my part of paris👀👀

the armand daniel bite was very do u know what it means to be loved by death

itty bitty armand fangs

need him alive as a testament to our companionship wtf are we even talking about anymore

arun/maitre😵‍💫

the fucking sunglasses im pissing😭😭

he got that shit on tho

welcome back trinity from the matrix

also just the fact that armand came back like yum i had so much fun on that hunt😁 anyway what are you two up to😇☺️

and louis and daniel just had a harrowing 2 hours trying to recover lost memories and coming to the realization that theyve been mega gaslit for decades

armand saying exactly what louis told daniel word for word

a hunch🫢

i love this show

im so excited for next weeks episode this story is unfolding so beautifully. im even more curious now about why and how this second interview is happening. ((also am very confused/curious about what looks like a protest in the promo??))

[oncegreatness]

— character info sheet.

(repost, don’t reblog)

name: Basil Karlo.

name meaning: Literally named after Boris Karloff and Basil Rathbone. Basil is a plant, also.

alias/es: Clayface, or Clayface I.

ethnicity: Mostly German and Indian-American [as a nod to Boris Karloff]. Other than that, we don't know specifics.

one picture / icon you like best of your character:

three h/cs you never told anyone:

I've said it on Discord forever ago so technically not cheating, but he is wholly immune to prion diseases. He simply out-mutates the prions.

Other voiceclaims I'd considered for him were Tony Jay and Tim Curry. Eventually I decided the vocal dissonance of having him be mainly voiced by Vincent Price was too good to pass up.

I've implied it, but he suffers from pretty bad Wernicke-Korsakoff syndrome, or wet brain disease, due to a lifetime of alcoholism. More on that here. It's bad, yes, but he has been convinced to try and get help.

three things your character likes doing in their free time:

Drinking. Dear god, drinking. It started off as a way to numb the pain of his nerve endings being on fire, but of course the 1900's just spurred on social drinking as a movement overall.

Providing snarky commentary on any situation ever. He revels in being a catty gay.

Just vibing NGL. Gotham is a very hectic place, and Basil is old as shit despite the powers offering a physical boost. Boy needs a break sometimes!

eight people your character likes / loves:

[main AU and in any AUs where I happen to write them both] Viktor Albrektsson Fries/Mr. Freeze. They're in an awkward polycule with Nora. Literal ride or die.

Sondra Fuller. The only child he doesn't view as a parasite, for whatever reason. Honestly, even I don't really know why he immediately latched onto Sondra. Perhaps it's because she reminds him of himself.

@enignoema he's quite fond of Riddler. Quite. It's genuinely rare people get beneath that exterior and tragically Eddie has captivated him.

Mary! @babydxhl :) best buds forever

Film Freak as a broad general. Fuck yeah, a loser who only speaks in movie references.

[NPC] Thierry Baudin. Arguably the first person he ever truly loved and wasn't just using as a means to an end. Baudin had a dark side to him, one he tried to only express in his camerawork.

@ people: yeah IDK interact with me more?? Shrug. My characters don't know a whole lot of people on the Tumblr side of things.

two things your character regrets:

Not killing his father.

At his lowest moments, the fact he wasn't the one who died. He managed to hide his having AIDS, as he was somewhat sickly to begin with.

one phobia your character has:

Being alone. He'll never cop to it, though. Who is he when he isn't performing? I don't think he knows; maybe he never knew.

Tagged by: I stole this lmfaooo

Tagging: @enignoema , @babydxhl ; whoever else wants, I'm going to bed in a bit and I have a literal single digit number of followers on this blog

[adamwatchesmovies]

Dolemite (1975)

Dolemite is memorable, culturally significant and entertaining all the way through. That said, the writing, performances, fight choreography and camerawork all are poor. The technical aspects make it hard to call it “good” but if it is a bad movie, it's one you won’t be sorry to see.

With the help of corrupt police detectives, Willie Green (D’Urville Martin, who also directs) sends his rival, Dolemite (Rudy Ray Moore), to prison. Since Dolemite's incarceration has done nothing to stem the criminal activity in his former neighborhood, fellow pimp Queen Bee (Lady Reed) convinces the prison's warden to release Dolemite and allow him to work with the FBI to clean up the streets.

Even if I warn you about how bad the fight choreography is, you’ve got no idea. It’s without a doubt the worst I’ve ever seen. Punches miss by a mile and Rudy Ray Moore doesn’t know a karate kick from a bowel movement. The camera is badly positioned, which makes it all the more obvious the bad guys he’s beating up are practically throwing themselves into trunks and onto the ground to show how virile and powerful our hero is.

The acting and writing are on the same level as the action scenes. The dialogue is lousy, which means the poor non-actors don’t stand a chance and this all makes the convoluted plot even more puzzling. In at least one shot you’ll see a boom mike in the bottom left corner of the screen. This means there’s plenty to make fun of but you don’t feel too bad about ridiculing this genuine effort because "Dolemite" is kind of in on the joke. Some of Dolemite’s dialogue is so outrageous they knew it would have the audience laughing. The violence might not be convincing but there’s a lot of it, which counts for something. Most importantly, Rudy Ray Moore has enormous amounts of swagger and presence. You keep watching, wondering what his character will do.

While Dolemite is not on the same level as Superfly, Shaft or Sweet Sweetback's Baadasssss Song, it contains the same elements that make them successful. It is a story of a Black hero hounded by corrupt white police officers who frame him and abuse their power until he rises to face them. While a pimp might not be what you would call a role model, Dolemite is the opposite of what traditional Hollywood Black men were like at the time. He is desired by all women regardless of their skin colour. He takes charge and never backs down. This film was made for Blacks, by Blacks. The humor spoke to them and while the film is funny, you can see elements of real-life pain and concerns beneath the surface - all of which Dolemite addresses with clenched fists and the heels of his boots. It is not a great film but you remember it and recognize why it was a big deal when it came out.

It’s probably best to go into Dolemite knowing the climate that created it. This may tempt you to watch 2019's Dolemite is My Name first to learn about the production, but I’d advise against it. The best scenes are spoiled by the Eddie Murphy film and it covers not only the making of this picture but that of the sequels as well. I say watch them as a double-feature but make sure this one is first.

You may wonder why anyone in their right mind would recommend Dolemite but if you’re interested in the history of cinema, particularly Black cinema, it’s a minor classic. (February 5, 2021)

[ablazenqueen]

hihi!

im someone who’s super new to Asian dramas and especially bl in general…

as someone now broaching these waters and generally interested, could you give me any recommendations?

ive fallen into the rabbit hole that is bad buddy- even though I still have no clue how…

and i know for a fact that im enjoying bad buddy.

ive followed like- a scary amount of people since… because im genuinely invested now.

and i always see these pretty gifs and everyone fangirling (or boying) over everything.

but I have no clue where to start! *cries* :(

i know ive seen a good fee gifs for was it bad and crazy?

i think ill enjoy it.

going off of that… can you help me? give me a few recs to ease me into the waters?

lots and lots of love,

gabi.

<3 <3 <3

Hey Gabi, thank you for the ask! I hope you’re having a lovely day!

Fell into the Bad Buddy rabbit hole too, huh? Can relate, my friend, can relate. Luckily, you have one of the most delightful fandoms here to keep you company!

Now on to the actual ask part of your ask, I think you just asked one of my favourite questions ever. I live for the day someone requests show recs from me. Which is to say that I have a rec list all ready to go and I’m 110% prepared to answer this. And I’m delighted to be your guide on this journey!

The one thing I’ll note, however, is that I usually personalize my recs to the person I’m giving them to (I take reccing very seriously) so, since I don’t know your personal tastes outside of Bad Buddy and potentially Bad And Crazy, I’ll just be recommending some of my own personal favourites and shows that I think are especially good for gently introducing you to the BL genre. I hope that’s okay! And don’t worry, I’ll keep this as spoiler-free as possible (nothing past the first ep of the show, pinky promise).

First thing’s first, you’ll see as you start to watch more Asian LGBT dramas that the style and tropes vary from country to country. I’m personally more a fan of Thailand’s cheery, lighthearted approach to BL/GLs but I know some people prefer the more natural displays of physical and sexual intimacy (passionate kisses, sex scenes, etc.) in Taiwanese shows. Korean’s style is typically quite pretty but they struggle to pull off any form of physical intimacy (lots of cringey kisses, lemme tell ya). Pinoy BLs are… harder to describe? Still a good time though. And I haven’t seen enough Vietnamese shows to find any I’ve personally liked so far (the only theme I’ve noted with Vietnam is camerawork and audio that makes me crinkle my nose, the directing isn’t my favourite but I think that might be due to low production budgets). But my biggest deciding factors in choosing which shows make it to my rec list are: a romance that’s genuinely easy to root for (healthy, believable, eager, consenting), entertaining to watch, and no creepy consent issues (tragically quite common and I’m very picky about this, which really cuts down the list).

So I’ll give you at least one example of each. And you only mentioned BL so I kept the list strictly to BLs but feel free to shoot me another ask if you want GL or just plain ole Asian drama recs too! My list for those is much smaller but I do have a list if you’re interested.

A Tale of a Thousand Stars

Origin: Thailand

My Thoughts: Personally my go-to when I introduce my friends to BL. The story is compelling, I love all of the characters and their development, it’s one of few BL I can think of that doesn’t have a side pairing and I think that’s a good thing, it helps you focus on the main ship. Beware though, it’s a tad angsty. (But with a happy ending!)

Vague as Possible Synopsis: After receiving a heart transplant from a volunteer teacher, Tian decides to follow in her footsteps and become a teacher in the village where she taught. There he meets the villagers, who are slow to trust, and Forest Ranger Phupha, a well-intentioned pain in the ass.

2Gether

Origin: Thailand

My Thoughts: I absolutely love the premise and the tropes in this one! It has fake dating, it has all the music tropes (I’m a huge sucker for music tropes), and it’s just really fun. (I have my gripes with this show, especially the second half but I won’t get into it. This is a rec list, not a pros and cons list. If someone wants my in-depth Things I Liked vs Things I Didn’t for this show though, let me know, I could ramble for days.) And I would highly recommend watching the second season. I haven’t finished it but I’ve heard that it fixes some of the things I didn’t love from the first season (and it’s directed by Bad Buddy’s director, our Lord and Saviour, P’aof).

Vague as Possible Synopsis: Tine, our lovely protag, is sick and tired of this guy who keeps flirting with him so he enlists the (initially reluctant) help of a musician named Sarawat to ward the guy off by fake hitting on Tine.

Cherry Magic

Origin: Japan

My Thoughts: Wholesome fluff to end all other wholesome fluff. The main pairing is to die for, they’ll give you cavities. And I love the little friend group they establish.

Vague as Possible Synopsis: An office-set romance in which our adorkable protagonist Adachi wakes up one day to find out he can read minds. Oh and also accidentally finds out through said mind-reading ability that his superstar coworker has a huge crush on him. Cue shenanigans.

Light On Me

Origin: Korea

My Thoughts: Pretty. I already said Korean dramas were pretty, right? This. This is what I mean (also Color Rush but I have mixed feelings about that show). Just the way it’s shot is really nice. It’s also wholesome and the characters are very loveable and their development is top tier!

Vague as Possible Synopsis: Lifelong loner-by-choice Taekyung decides one day that he wants to make friends. His teacher recommends joining the student council where he’s met with… mixed responses.

Be Loved in House: I Do

Origin: Taiwan

My Thoughts: The bestie quartet is amazing, I love them. Good main ship, two good side ships. There’s a cat so gold star for that.

Vague as Possible Synopsis: The employer of the company Shi Lei works at quits and is replaced by Yu Zhen, whose first decree upon walking into the office on his first day is that employees are strictly prohibited from dating. This doesn’t sit well with the employees in question so Shi Lei sets out to convince his new boss to abolish the rule.

Gaya Sa Pelikula

Origin: Filipino

My Thoughts: Really like the rep and discussion of queerness in this one. And the use of the fake dating trope. This is probably my least favourite on this list but it’s probably also my favourite Pinoy BL. Although #My Day was cute (if a little read: very weird).

Vague as Possible Synopsis: Well. There actually isn’t much plot to this one. Pretty much all you need to know is that it’s fake dating (my beloved).

Manner of Death

Origin: Thailand

My Thoughts: This one is probably my all-time personal favourite (aside from Bad Buddy which is shaping up to be one of - if not THE - top rec on my list) because murder mysteries are my cup of tea. However, it’s probably not for everyone (but you did mention an interest in Bad and Crazy so I’m assuming that means you like crime shows?) and it’s definitely not typical for the BL genre. I probably wouldn’t watch this first. But if you’re a fan of murder mysteries and crime shows like I am, this is a definite rec (maybe watch a few others on this list first though).

Vague as Possible Synopsis: Dr. Bunn is new to town. He’s a coroner. There’s a murder. There’s a mystery. Boom. Done. That’s the plot. (Hire me, MyDramaList, aren’t my summaries amazing?)

A few others I liked for some reasons, disliked for other reasons, but wouldn’t not rec:

My Engineer (Thai, cute as hell side ships, personally not a fan of the main ship)

My Gear and My Gown (Thai, convoluted but sweet romance, pacing issues)

Hello Stranger (Pinoy, cute, I’m just not a fan of the video-call format)

#My Day (Pinoy, really weird but good, takes you some time to warm up to the love interest)

I Told Sunset About You (Thai, it’s amazing, there’s just one thing that rubbed me the wrong way, but I know it’s very well-loved in the BL fandom and I generally quite liked it)

Kieta Hatsukoi

Origin: Japan

My Thoughts: Okay, I hesitate to recommend things before they’re done airing but Bad Buddy and Keita Hatsukoi have been my two exceptions to this rule. As with Cherry Magic, this is wholesome and heartwarming as hell, the friendships, the romances, it’s all adorable.

Vague as Possible Synopsis: Due to a misunderstanding, Aoki’s desk neighbour ends up thinking he has a crush on him and he can’t deny it without throwing his friend under the bus. Shenanigans ensue.

I hope this won’t come as a surprise but from what I can tell, it looks like Bad and Crazy is going to be an implied but not canon m|m (censored) romance. It’s listed as a bromance. (I don’t know if you were expecting it to be a BL, personally I’m probably going to watch it anyway.) But! If you want to watch an upcoming crime show that’s actually a BL, I’m personally suuuuper hyped for Not Me, which comes out this Sunday! The trailer’s on YouTube if you want to give it a look. Other upcoming BL shows on my to-watch list that you might be interested in - if you prefer watching things as they air - are Kinnporsche (presumably airing in April) and Enchanté (presumably airing… eventually? some people have been guessing it’ll take over Bad Buddy’s time slot so we’ll see), trailers also on YouTube.

I hope this helps!

[xenosagaepisodeone]

I’m unsure what I could say about Possession (1981) that would be unique enough to warrant a post about it. The camerawork was brilliant and I loved the small acknowledgement of it’s intentionally surreal quality (when Margit comments that that Anna is hoping for a “magic wand” - an item that typically comes into power when waved in a circular motion). Characters circle others in an attempt to ensnare and devour them like wolves while completely unaware of the camera --the disquieting forces of their world-- indulging in the same predatory motions to unravel them. Anna’s tentacle lover does not need to continue this ritual of continually coiling itself around her once it has her in it’s grasp because she has already made herself open and willing to it -- a desire that Mark is unable to wean out of her.

The subway scene was a remarkable performance, but only part I found genuinely difficult to watch was the ballet scene where Anna holds one of her dancers in place until she is screaming in pain. The intentions are not lost on the viewer, Anna is giving a visual demonstration of how she conceptualizes her relationship with Mark. She mimics his cold disposition while the dancer’s face contorts not wholly unlike Anna’s episodes. Mark’s presence compressed Anna into the role of a good wife during their time together, and his absence during his mission relieved her of just enough space to writhe in misery.

Mark never fully comes to understand why Anna is the way she is, and for all the throwing of himself at her feet he does, he is incapable of responding with empathy when Anna tries to put her feelings into words -- a dynamic she carries her own concepts of (”because you could say “I” for me”). I found it interesting that Helen’s existence not only further illuminated Anna’s isolation, but also what Mark sees as what he owes in their relationship. Mark only exhibits comfort as a provider for his family, and the most amount of intimacy he engages in with Helen (who is the idealized version of his wife) regards caring for his son. The farthest extent in which their relationship progresses intimately as individuals is lying next to one another with explicitly non sexual intentions. I suppose that this provides the most reasonable answer for why there exists this chasm in their communication -- he knows how to play his role and does not understand why she cannot play hers.

[charmedseoull]

House of Cards by sugamins Review (contains spoilers)

This review discusses an 18+ work. Please read at your own discretion.

House of Cards by sugamins is an exhilarating thriller that is jam packed with moral questioning and an affirmative grasp on adult content. Its descriptions are laced with accuracy from an author who pays attention to every tiny detail.

When reading House of Cards, I was enraptured by its concept and storytelling. The Neo-Seoul setting is painted as a bottomless pit of drugs, sex, and violence. Readers and characters themselves feel helpless to where the truth of what happens beneath the eyes of society is shoved to their faces involuntarily. I adored the way the story sucked you into this world that’s loosely based on our own reality. There’s many quotes and observations from the characters that can eerily remind you of reality’s own issues.

Many fanfics don’t tackle these larger than life subjects, at least in a way that is this satisfying and coherent. House of Cards deserves its spot as the second most read English work on Archive of Our Own. Its writing, although wordy, fleshes out moral concepts in a way that isn’t romanticized or dismissive. There are multiple times when reading this fanfic where I had to stop and process a line or phrase. This fanfic is an experience of true entertainment that deserves a read when you have time to truly observe it.

In the beginning, its protagonist Kim Taehyung offers a point of view and introduction into the gangster world that readers can follow closely. Readers develop with Taehyung, witnessing him spiral into the world and eventually become desensitized to it. He loses a part of himself when he is in Haedogje Pa and at the end of the story is no longer so set in his moral beliefs. House of Cards brings up the same questions again and again: What is right? What is wrong? Can something be both? These questions are simple, but the situations the story puts Taehyung in allows us to question the true answers to them. The story frames these questions and concepts in a way that isn’t contrived as well with sugamins having a solid vision of where the story will go with them. Park Jimin is a character that has these moral questions thrust upon him unwillingly. In the story, he is but a victim to the entire world of Haedogje Pa. Unlike Taehyung, who chose to enter the world on an undercover mission, and Jeon Jungkook, who was born into the world as its rightful heir, Jimin did not choose to enter the world. He was stolen off the streets against his will. His perspective in the story introduces a contrast that engages readers to question the roles of each character.

Kim Taehyung is our protagonist with no real antagonist except society itself and a character that’s built up towards the end but eventually killed. However, Taehyung does bad things. We’re supposed to root for him, but he tortures a man, kills another, and threatens one that we grow close to as readers heartlessly. Then, take Park Jimin. As readers, he gets all our sympathy as an involuntary participant in the world. He’s taken advantage of sexually and never has something genuine happen to him. Hidden agendas plague the characters with our protagonist himself having an extensive one that works to take down the entire gangster world. Jimin never has a hidden agenda. He seeks love and comfort, indulging in designer clothing and an exotic animal as a pet. Even with all the luxuries around him, he doesn’t live for those. He lives for the knowledge that he cared for and safe. Readers themselves don’t come to terms with that until the end of the story. 

The one genuine thing that happens to Jimin is in the second to last chapter. Here, he’s the breaking point of the entire operation and has to deliver the hard drives with evidence to convict Jungkook. There’s this heartbreaking moment where he’s in the penthouse apartment by himself, downing pills and trying to gain the courage to go through with his actions. It’s a moment that hurts as a reader as we’ve witnessed his struggles and have gotten to understand his backstory. There is deep pain and trauma within him, but then he does it. He enters into police custody with the hard drives and exits the world of Haedogje Pa. In that scene, this is where the genuine thing happens. One of the side characters named Sungah comforts him in this hard to read moment. She offers him a plushie and he denies at first, but then accepts it. There’s a tonal shift in this scene that takes us out of Haedogje Pa and back into reality. It's a sobering effect that affects the rest of the chapter with the eventual arrest of Jungkook and end of the operation.

The dialogue in House of Cards is impactful as well. There’s so many lines in the story that hit and invigorate me. Sometimes they drive me up a wall with how wrong they sound or they strike a nerve and push me to the ground. If House of Cards were a television show, I can imagine the camerawork and music playing as characters say things. The most powerful lines have to be at the beginning and end of the story. In the beginning, they set the tone especially all of Kim Namjoon’s lines that, if you follow and know BTS, are filled with wisdom and experience and warning of what’s to come from the story. Then in the end, the lines act like they are closing a book or flipping a page. They make readers move on from the story which has given them more than enough to ponder in its 25 chapters.

I’m a skimmer to a fault when it comes to stories. Long descriptions of scenery and appearance bore me and that’s just the reality of what I like as a reader. However, I found House of Cards’ wordy writing grasping me by the throat and keeping my eyes glued to each word. I absorbed every detail voraciously because it kept it so interesting. If you skim, you miss out on all these tiny details in the descriptions or nods sugamins puts in the story. The BTS members’ habits like how Taehyung licks his lips is put into the story seamlessly where you don’t recognize it. Usually I notice those things, but House of Cards makes those habits and nods its own. 

I could do an entire breakdown of House of Cards’ writing conventions and details, but I don’t want to keep you here all day. This story is wonderful. It’s deep, rich, and captured my attention like no other. That comes from someone who's been inhaling novels since a young age and studies them to no end. House of Cards is not only a fanfic, but it is an experience. 

Its adult themes are written with care and I love every bit of its story direction. Its ending is the best part where all this build up pays off in a way that’s unsatisfying. I love that dissatisfaction. Do Taehyung, Jimin, and Jungkook truly love each other? In the words of sugamins herself in the interview I did with her, “I didn’t want House of Cards to be seen as a romantic story when I created it. If readers see it that way, they are more than entitled to their own interpretations. I cannot tell them how they can interpret my art, that is not my role as the creator.” 

This fanfic is a must read if you can handle its themes and are of age to read it. It's a heavy read though and even if you go into it with the intention of keeping it casual, I assure you that its writing and world will suck you right in. I love House of Cards and I can’t say that enough.

-

Thank you for reading this review. You can read House of Cards here. You can read the interview I did with sugamins here. Then, of course, feel free to follow me to see more of the work I do.

[cometomecosette]

“Empty Chairs at Empty Tables,” “Every Day” and “Valjean’s Confession,” Walnut Street Theatre, 2008. Josh Young as Marius, Julie Craig as Cosette, Hugh Panaro as Jean Valjean.

Unfortunately the first two verses of “Empty Chairs” are missing, nor is the camerawork always of the best quality. Still, Josh Young is definitely one of my favorites of the Marius actors I’ve discovered through video. His sumptuous, darkly shaded, powerful voice is magnificently suited to the Romantic-flavored music and his acting is spot-on. His anguish in “Empty Chairs” is vivid, raw and heartbreaking, and this is followed by appropriately sweet tenderness as Cosette consoles him in “Every Day” and appropriate shock blended with genuine compassion for Valjean in the confession scene.

Julie’s Cosette is beautifully sung and sweetly acted too. Some might object that she seems too happy at the beginning of “Every Day” when Marius is in so much pain. But the slightly shoddy camerawork means that we don’t see her face until “Every day we’ll remember that night...” so for all we know her expression might have been more concerned and empathetic on the earlier lines, before transitioning into the joy of remembering the night they met.

Hugh’s Valjean is equally effective in his quiet despair and urgent pleading that Marius never reveal his secret to Cosette.

Well done by all.

[twentiethcenturymoviesandtv]

Casablanca: Facets of Film

Once the story and characters are set, and the script is written, all that’s left is to set up the cameras, special effects, costumes, music, sets, and performances.  Nothing to it, right?

These elements listed above are, while not quite as vital to a story as the plot and characters, absolutely intrinsic to any movie.  These are the factors that make a film a film, and it is sometimes up to these factors to take a good movie and turn it into a great one, coming together to best express what is going on in shorthand, without having to explain it to the audience.  In short, these elements are storytelling devices, designed to further the plot, make the movie look good, but never overshadow the core story and characters.  It’s a delicate balance, but when it works, it works very well.  

So yeah, they’re pretty important.

Any film worth its salt has to know how to use these elements, no matter how big or small, to benefit and enhance the existing story and characters.  The skillful use of these factors combined with a great script and good characters can make the difference between a ‘good’ movie and a classic.  

Such is the case for Casablanca.

Even though Casablanca didn’t have a very large budget, (initially thought to be just another standard film, nothing special) the filmmakers made the most of what they had, effectively using the tools at their disposal to turn Casablanca into a masterpiece.

Today, we’re going to be taking a look at the storytelling devices used to do that in order to answer this question:

How does Casablanca use its movie-making tools in order to get across the story it wants to?

Let’s take a look, starting with something that would seem pretty simple: the camerawork.  (Spoilers below!)

Like I’ve mentioned before on this blog, there’s more to cinematography than pointing a camera at the actors and letting it roll.  A good movie crew knows how to use a camera to focus on the emotion and impact of a scene, and a better one knows how to use a camera to add a new layer of depth to the scene, and the film overall.  Casablanca is certainly the latter.

One of the most interesting things about the visual style of Casablanca is the way it’s shot.  It’s not filmed like the typical drama or romance film of the 1940s, rather, it’s shot very much like a film noir, full of dark lighting and use of shadows to emphasize the ambiguity of several characters.  Notable exceptions include the character of Victor Lazlo, who is rather consistently shot considerably brighter as both a visual and moral contrast to the more darkly-lit Rick Blaine.

On the other hand, the character of Ilsa is lit rather differently; rather than explicitly light or shadow, Ilsa is shot out of focus, always appearing hazy and with a shine in her eyes, making her seem almost disconnected and hauntingly beautiful throughout the film, almost placing her in a different world from the other main characters.

There are a few standout shots in the film, but I would be amiss were I not to point to the cinematography of the ending for the chief example.

Fully cementing the sense of an uncertain future, the ending is shot in a fog, with the mist enveloping the characters as Rick reveals his decision on who is to board that plane.  Further emphasizing this is the final shot, of Rick and Captain Renault walking off into the fog until they are completely obscured, swallowed up by the haze.  

There are other notable shots throughout the film, of course.  The image of Rick talking to Victor, each in their respective lighting serves as a distinct capture of the two characters, and the shot of Rick’s shadow falling close to Captain Renault serves as a vivid and distinctive visual among many.  Even the image of Rick, dripping wet and heartbroken on the train station platform, tends to stick with an audience.  But there’s more to a film looking good than just the camera.

There is very little that could be considered a use of ‘special effects’ in Casablanca, and what is there is so incredibly dated it’s difficult to take seriously.  As heavy an emotional blow as the flashback sequence of Rick and Ilsa in Paris is, it’s hard to ignore that the scenes in the car are one of the most egregious cases of Driving a Desk in Hollywood history.  The plane used in the airport sequences is more salvageable, but still not exactly on the same level as effects used in other war movies of the time.  Despite the emotional weight of the scenes in which these effects were used, the effects themselves don’t exactly look all that great.  But that’s fine.  The rest of the visuals more than make up for it.

From Rick Blaine’s iconic white suit to his classic Bogart fedora and trenchcoat, to even the design of club, every inch of this film breathes with well-defined imagery.  Every inch of this movie is distinctly Casablanca, dark lighting and all.  The set of Rick’s Café Americain is memorable and full of personality itself, requiring very few detours out of it.  It’s contained, but it works.  The few sets that are used outside of the club are as real-life and gritty as this one, cementing Casablanca as feeling very real and personal.

But Rick’s Café Americain just wouldn’t be the same without the music, thanks to Sam.

The musical score of Casablanca is soaring and moving, but, of course, nothing stands out like ‘As Time Goes By’.  Despite the number of tunes that are played (and sung, courtesy of Dooley Wilson), throughout the film, nothing quite says Casablanca like ‘As Time Goes By’.  It’s a bittersweet tune that perfectly encompasses the mood of the film, and Rick and Ilsa’s equally bittersweet love affair.  But there’s more to the soundtrack than that.

The instrumental music of Casablanca is there for a simple reason: to emphasize and enhance emotion.  It more than rises to the task.  The music of this film soars and drops with the mood, setting the tone for each scene, always teetering on that line of darkness but never getting too cynical, just like the movie itself.  Thanks to the film’s winning combination of simple sets, camerawork, and music, Casablanca is perfectly put together.

Now, wait a minute, you might say.  Sets, camerawork and music are all well and good, but they can’t carry a movie by themselves.

You’re absolutely right.  In fact, even with all of those elements, Casablanca wouldn’t mean anything now if not for the final, essential ingredient: the performances.

It’s here that Casablanca truly earns its reputation.

Every single part in this film, from large to small, is acted to perfection.

Humphrey Bogart is the cynic with a heart of gold as Rick Blaine, his first ‘romantic’ role, and boy does he sell it.  Bogart plays Rick with a perfect blend of compassion and brusqueness, with a quick wit shielding a broken heart.  All of his emotions, while not expressed outright, are present in every movement and expression, from guarded love to pained sacrifice, to the simple happiness from days in Paris.  The conflict within him is visible, but not overstated and obvious, a perfectly subdued performance for a perfectly subdued character.  Examples of note include the scene where Ilsa comes to explain herself to Rick, the farewell note at the train station, and (of course) the scene at the airport from the very end.  

Ingrid Bergman puts in a similar performance as the carefully closed off Ilsa, portraying a character in turmoil, torn between two men, and two worldviews.  Her own struggles are perfectly realized by Bergman’s quiet strength, and the cracks in the shell that become more apparent towards the end.  She portrays desperation, love, despair, and wistfulness, balancing between love and duty in a believable internal conflict that the audience can both see and connect to, and her surprise and uncertainty at the end mirror the expressions the audiences themselves feel.

Paul Henried as Victor Lazlo is outspoken and upright, a good and just man in trouble.  He is a patriot, brave to a fault, and yet very human.  Henried gets across the humanity of an utterly heroic character who, in any other film, would likely be the hero.

Claude Rains shines as the scummy, sharp witted and dry Captain Renault, perfectly portraying the corruption and friendly relationship with Rick.  Rains manages to present a character that we aren’t exactly fond of, but enjoy watching, adding a layer of charm to the conniver and making his turn to the side of the angels at the end that much more believable.

And of course, the other cast plays their parts perfectly.  Dooley Wilson, Conrad Viedt, Sydney Greenstreet and Peter Lorre all put forth excellent performances for their respective characters, portraying the emotions and motivations necessary without having to explain in dialogue.  It’s a one of a kind cast, in a one of a kind film.  It’s no wonder Casablanca is considered one of the best acted films of all time.

Every character in this film does their part, each contributing the exact amount with their reserved, but heartfelt performances.  It’s a genuine film full of genuine emotion, carried by every storytelling device used in the film that comes together for a final product that’s complex, but not complicated.  Every element comes together, resting on the shoulders of the actors to draw the audience in, resulting in a gripping and compelling narrative that’s helped along by the masterful work done by the filmmakers.  As a result, the film feels real, if not realistic, grounded in emotion and immensely moving, a film that’s consistent from beginning to end.

Casablanca has long been hailed a masterpiece, a classic, one of the greatest films of all time, and with good reason.  Every factor fits together perfectly to create a whole greater than the sum of its parts, a story that has been passed down for more than seventy five years, and is likely to be passed on for seventy five more.  Casablanca just works, in every sense of the word and from every angle.

Thank you guys so much for reading!  Don’t forget that the ask box is always open for questions, suggestions, discussions, or just saying hi!  Join us next time where we’re going to be discussing the behind-the-scenes story of Casablanca in ‘Facets of Filmmaking’.  I hope to see you there!

[animebw]

Demon Slayer: Season 1 Reflection

I’m of the opinion that 2019 was a particularly dismal year for anime. Sure, I haven’t seen all the hugely praised stuff yet, so it’s possible I’ll warm up to the year as a whole once I get a fuller picture of it. But from what I’ve experienced thus far, it’s been really miserable. Disappointment after disappointment, promising show after promising show failing to live up to its potential, and even lots of the 2019 anime everyone fell in love with really didn’t click with me. Fire Fore wasted oodles of talent on some of the worst writing and directing I’ve seen in a long time. Dororo was pretty great, but also uneven as hell from start to finish. Dr. Stone won everyone else’s hearts but I couldn’t ignore the obvious flaws in its presentation, and honestly, I think my opinion on it has only soured as time’s gone on. One Punch Man’s second season was probably the biggest second-season downgrade since Psycho-Pass, and then Psycho-Pass one-upped it right back with its worst installment yet. Not to mention the conversation and marketing hype that made a smash hit out of Shield Hero, one of the most viscerally unpleasant, harmfully selfish occurrences I’ve seen befall this community. Even the still-reliable My Hero Academia feels like it’s downgraded substantially after its masterpiece of a third season. And, of course, there was the utter tragedy that befell Stars Align, a potential masterpiece that could have truly placed a new landmark for anime, crippled by corporate bullshit and forced to air only half-finished. You couldn’t get more existentially depressing if you tried, especially after the utter triumph of a year that was anime in 2018.

So in a way, Demon Slayer letting me down too makes a very sad kind of sense. The biggest breakout hit of anime in 2019, a massively popular show with everyone’s well-wishes and the efforts of an absurdly talented studio behind it, a shonen smash that’s promising to become just as much a mainstay of the popular conception of anime as MHA in the modern era, that only just last night went so far as to win Anime of the Year at the Crunchyroll awards? Of course it was never gonna live up to the hype. Of course it would fall short of truly being special time and time again, stumbling over its own two feet every time it looked like it was actually gonna pull through. I’ve wondered in the past if I’m turning into an anime hipster, but man, I’ve never felt as disillusioned with the state of the community at large than I have with Demon Slayer. I can only hope this feeling doesn’t last, because I don’t want to ever stop loving what this incredible medium is capable of.

To be clear, I wouldn’t go so far as to call Demon Slayer a bad show. Far from it, in fact; the only reason it’s able to be such a crushing disappointment is that you can easily see all the ways it comes so damn close to working. The action is consistently kickass, with killer kinetic camerawork and eye-poppingly gorgeous stylistic effects that make each clash of steel and blood feel like a painting in motion. Plus, the extra visceral kick from the body horror of the demons themselves can be giddily nasty, loading each fight with a real sense of tension and menace. Ufotable’s crack team of animators keeps the production consistent all the way through, with few dips in quality to speak of. And at its core, the story of Tanjirou’s incredible empathy against the forces of darkness is really fucking solid. There’s genuine gravitas to his journey, powerful emotion behind his determination to never give up on reaching out and believing in the best of everyone, no matter how painful it gets or how difficult it is to believe in. Sure, the mechanics of the story are fairly boilerplate shonen, but as shows like Blue Exorcist and My Hero Academia have proven time and time again, a well-worn formula done well can still delight and amaze you no matter how many times you see it. There are all the making of a classic in Demon Slayer, all the potential to be something truly special that would earn its astounding popularity a million times over.

But as much as I want to love this show, as many of its pieces speak to me, it just doesn’t hold together with the polish it needs. As beautiful as the action is, the disconnect between Ufotable’s photorealistic backgrounds and the hyperstylized characters and effects never truly goes away. The moment-to-moment pacing can be awkward and stilted, making the already-unnatural dialogue feel even less genuine. There’s no marriage between its light and darkness, no moment where the over-the-top attempts at comedy, snarling villains, and pop-art sensibilities exist in the same world as the sorrow of Tanjirou’s empathy and the sadness he fights to overcome. As a result, you’re constantly getting tonal whiplash, thrown between moments of genuine pathos and attempts at gags so poorly integrated it feels like they take place in an entirely different show. Every scene is full of a million little distractions that add up and cripple your ability to truly immerse yourself in this world, and the writing on its own just isn’t strong enough to cover for that deficiency. And when it sucks, it really fucking sucks. I still can’t get Zenitsu’s mind-numbing screeches out of my head no matter how hard I try. And all that wonderful emotional work and haunting spectacle can only crash up against this impenetrable wall of imperfection, trying so hard to break through but never having enough power behind its punches to truly do so.

Demon Slayer isn’t a bad show. Compared to some of the worst shows of 2019, it might as well be a masterpiece. But it’s perfectly indicative of what a sorrowful dead zone for anime 2019 was, a mediocre attempt at greatness that just can’t pull together no matter how hard it tries. Thankfully, it ends strong enough to give me hope for the franchise’s future: maybe there’s still a chance for it all to matter in the end. Maybe as we leave 2019 behind and step into the already-lightyears-better 2020, this show can finally come into its own and become what it always had the potential to be. Frankly, far stranger things have happened in the anime world, and I wouldn’t be surprised if I end up genuinely liking Demon Slayer as a whole when all is said and done. For now, though, I give its first frustrating, tentative, almost-remarkable season a score of:

5/10

Man, that show was a ride and a half, huh? Thank you all for sticking with me despite my criticisms, and I hope you’ll stay around for the show that will take its place! I’m still working my way through the leftovers of 2019 I didn’t get to yet, and after spending so much time on a show that’s all about slaying demons, I figure it’s only fair I watch a show that’s nice to demons to apologize to them:

The Demon Girl Next Door

Will this be good? I can only hope. See you all next time for the start of a new adventure!

[creativity-is-rebellion]

More Top 20 Must-See Horror Movies

 Especially now we are in isolation, who doesn’t crave a good horror movie to watch? To that purpose, I have created yet another top 20 must-see horror movies, along with why you should be watching them. So get into your comfy clothes and blanket, grab some popcorn, and settle in to watch these horror gems (WARNING: May contain spoilers).

1) Ginger Snaps (2000)

I first saw this movie when I was fifteen years old, and, watching it recently, I was still impressed how it handles the perils of transitioning from teenhood to womanhood. Ginger Snaps follows the story of two outcast sisters, Ginger (Katharine Isabelle) and Brigitte (Emily Perkins), in the mindless suburban town of Bailey Downs. On the night of Ginger's first period, she is savagely attacked by a wild creature. Ginger Snaps is a terrifying movie with good character development, acting is convincing and it has a fast-paced story line. If you're into well-done horror movies Ginger Snaps is the movie for you. It is one of the best modern werewolf movies I have seen.

2) Annihilation (2018)

Drawing on mythology and body horror, Annihilation is an intelligent film that asks big questions and refuses to provide easy answers. It is Sci-fi horror at its best, boasting a very intriguing and unique idea whilst entertaining the viewer throughout the film. Definitely a must-watch.

3) Green Room (2015)

A punk rock band becomes trapped in a secluded venue after finding a scene of violence. For what they saw, the band themselves become targets of violence from a gang of white power skinheads who want to eliminate all evidence of the crime. Influenced by exploitation movies of the 1970s (and punk music of the 1980s), this horror-thriller is rooted in a gripping, grisly kind of realism without resorting to lazy coincidence or stupidity. This is again a fresh take on horror and worth a view.

4) 1922 (2017)

I learned from a great film critic many years back that your own best judgement of a movie is best discovered when you realise that you are still thinking of it many days later. This Stephen King film stays true to the iconic master with all the tell-tale signs of a Kings classic: A haunting grimness that lingers throughout the movie, a tragedy and of course, outstanding performances. The mother that returns from the dead leaves you in a crazy suspense of whether it is simply a dream, a man’s demented insanity, or an actual reality. Thomas Jane’s performance was stellar and totally believable as a farmer in rural America in 1922. He actually takes you through the movie as if you were part of him and what is going on. The message that Stephen King leaves you with is dreadfully powerful of how greed can destroy all. Definitely worth the watch, especially for Stephen King fans.

5) Evil Dead (1981; remake 2013)

Both versions of this movie are great, but I have a special fondness for the original, which was Sam Raimi’s directorial debut. The camerawork is amazing for a low-budget film, and the creepy atmosphere is eerily accurate. We feel Ash’s pain when his friend, sister and girlfriend are one-by-one changed into Deadites, and the ending keeps you guessing, and wanting, a sequel. I am quite a fan of the Evil Dead franchise actually, and have just finished watching the TV adaptation Ash vs. Evil Dead. I’m savouring the last episodes, and am sad that it got cancelled. I look forward to more from this franchise, hopefully in the not-to-distant future.

6) Get Out (2017)

This film is unique, telling the tale of young black man who meets his white girlfriend’s parents for the first time. Jordan Peele’s film delivers a chilling satire of liberal racism in the US. More than just a standard-issue thriller, this brutal, smart movie is impeccably made, as well as surprising, shocking, and funny, while also offering a compassionate, thoughtful look at race. Expect only the very best a film has to offer, with a nasty twist at the end that you won’t see coming. 

7) Hell Night (1981)

One of the best things about this movie which follows fraternity and sorority pledges who spend the night in a mansion haunted by victims of a family massacre is that it stars legendary Scream Queen of The Exorcist fame, Linda Blair. Other than that, prepare for a fun, wild ride, the way every good slasher movie should be.

8) Insidious Part 2 (2013)

I actually enjoyed this sequel more than the first movie, as it was less plodding and more action-packed, with an intriguing antagonist in the form of the mysterious “Bride in Black,” who turns out to be the evil spirit of serial killer Parker Crane, who, as we know from the previous movie (SPOILER ALERT) has taken over the body of Josh Lambert, and is fighting for control of his soul. I enjoyed seeing the return of Elise Rainier, who was (SPOILER ALERT AGAIN) killed off in the previous movie. James Wan directed this second helping even more masterfully than the first. A must-watch.

9) Sleepaway Camp (1983)

This is a campy slasher gem, where they cast real teenagers, which elevated the drama of the plot somewhat. Sleepaway Camp tells the story of a young girl named Angela who goes to Camp Arawak with her cousin Ricky. Once the two arrive at camp, a series of events/killings leads the campers to discover that there is a killer on the loose. Sleepaway Camp is not in any way intense or fast paced. However, even though many initially might look at as a “rip off” slasher film, the movie does get creative when it comes to the brutal killings and certain aspects to the film that no one saw coming. Including the jaw-dropping twist at the end. I’m not giving it away. You just have to watch it.

10) Cold Prey (Fritt Vilt) (2006)

This movie takes full advantage of its snowy, secluded set-pieces, using Norway’s harsh winter landscape to masterfully build tension and heighten the sense of isolation. As horror movies go, Cold Prey is a slow-starter, committing the first third of its running time to investigating the signs of violence scattered throughout the hotel, allowing the characters to theorise about what pernicious acts may have taken place before the hotel’s abandonment. It begins at the intriguing yet deliberate pace of a psychological horror film as the sequestered friends, initially inebriated and giggly, explore the hotel and sharing secrets, but the movie’s party-hard atmosphere bursts open at the 40-minute mark to reveal a black horror centre. Slick and stylish, Cold Prey is a genuine pleasure to watch.

11) The Hills Have Eyes (1977; remake 2006)

Even if it echoes a better film (namely, The Texas Chainsaw Massacre), the original movie is still an important one to view for lovers of the horror genre.  This is a sometimes ghastly  - and occasionally absurd - shocker that really gets under one's skin. Though many critics initially despised the original outing, it has since been called one of the best horror movies of the 1970s. Scary-movie specialist Wes Craven made this viscerally-violent feature on a low budget, and some horror connoisseurs call it his best. Ultimately the "normal" people strike back with a ferocious blood-lust they didn't know they had, and the question is how much a "civilised" person can be pushed before one becomes a savage. Are the Carters really all that much "better" than Jupiter and his spawn? That is a question that you, as the audience member, are required to ponder.

12) The Dawn of the Dead (2004)

This remake of George A. Romero's 1978 sequel to Night of the Living Dead soups up the zombies, cranks up the gross factor to 11, and has a lot of cheeky in-jokes about its predecessor. In comparison with the original, out are the shrieking blondes and rampaging looters, in are smart, controlled Ana (Sarah Polley as a believable nurse not afraid to wield a fire poker) and Kenneth (Ving Rhames), who is exactly the kind of cop you want walking beside you if you are facing scores of the undead.

The zombies are a bit spryer in this film, and the pregnancy of one of the main characters is not the life-giving promise it was in the first movie. But the ending is what differs most from the original. If you're a fan of the horror genre, then this flick is a welcome, if derivative, fright-fest in the school of Romero's classics.

13) The Cabin in The Woods (2011)

What starts out as another five-band teen getaway to a cabin in the woods ends up becoming a fresh take on the trope, with puppeteers behind what is taking place, in a twisted game of Choose Your Adventure. The ending is fittingly grim, but you won’t be disappointed. Definitely worth one hour and thirty-five minutes of your time.

14) The Babadook (2014)

The feature debut of writer-director Jennifer Kent is not just genuinely, deeply scary, but also a beautifully told tale of a mother and son, enriched with layers of contradiction and ambiguity. It presents grief as a demon, questions reality, and creeps out the viewer by making psychopathology seem like something that could happen to anybody. The style of the film is not teasing exactly - it's too sad and lonely - but there is certainly a hair-pulling mixture of glum laughter and vast apprehension. Is the demon real? Does it matter? That’s for you to judge. Either way, if it’s in a word, or if it’s with a look, you can’t get rid of the Babadook.

15) Suspiria (Original and the Remake - 1977 and 2019 respectively)

Suspiria is a baroque piece of esoteric expressionism that you enter - and exit - without understanding so much as feeling. It's always fascinating to watch; the thrills and spills are so classy and fast that the movie becomes in effect what horror movies seemed like when you were too young to get in to see them. Director Dario Agento works so hard for his effects -- throwing around shock cuts, coloured lights, and peculiar camera angles -that it would be impolite not to be a little frightened. This entry stands out as it is a visually beautiful horror movie, a bright fantasy that lives off its aesthetic. If you are a horror fan and haven’t seen this movie yet, then you’re not living right. The remake is also worth a watch, something that is oftentimes unique in the horror genre.

16) A Quiet Place (2018)

This gripping, clever monster movie is one of those rare genre treats that seizes on a simple, unique idea and executes it so perfectly and concisely that it elicits satisfying squeals of delight. It's directed and co-written by Krasinski, who's best known for his work in comedy but translates his experience in that genre to the expert building and releasing of tension here. A Quiet Place is, in many ways, like an extended classic horror movie sequence, such as famous ones in The Birds or Aliens, wherein the heroes must try not to disturb packs of resting monsters.

At the same time, Krasinski uses his quiet moments like music, ranging from moments of restful beauty -- including a father-son trip to a waterfall, where it's noisy enough that they can talk and even shout -- to moments of pause. A loud noise can cause a jump, but it's immediately followed by tension and dread: Will the creatures come this time? The real beauty is the movie's primal quality, based on the most basic elements of life, such as survival and protection of the species. No explanation is given for the monsters' existence; they, like us, are just here. Images of water, sand, bare feet, crops, and plant life serve to underline the theme of life itself. A few overly familiar horror movie clichés keep it from being perfect, but otherwise A Quiet Place is so good that it will leave viewers speechless.

17) The Exorcist (1973)

Once famously dubbed ‘the most terrifying movie ever made,” this movie is steeped in urban legend, especially concerning the unfortunate happenings that occurred when it was being made. 

If you think your teen is ready for this shocking film, keep in mind that some audience members in the '70s reportedly fainted after seeing Dick Smith's grisly makeup effects on Blair. In some extreme cases, viewers even required psychiatric care. Also, the moans, snarls, and profane utterances from Regan (most are actually the dubbed-in voice of a well-known older actress, Mercedes McCambridge) amount to some of the most chilling audio ever done for film.

Thanks in part to Linda Blair's wrenching, Oscar-nominated performance, The Exorcist was a huge hit, earning back 10 times its $10 million budget (a then-lavish sum, outrageous for a "mere" horror flick). Movie historians cite it (along with The Texas Chainsaw Massacre) as the conclusive end of old-school spook shows featuring Dracula and Frankenstein and bobbing rubber bats. If you haven’t watched it yet, you may have your horror movie fan card revoked.

18) The Final Destination Franchise (2000 - 2011)

If I had to list all of the movies in the Final Destination franchise in order of quality, I would say 5, 1, 2, 3, and 4. Fourth instalment withstanding, the series is a formidable addition to the horror genre, as the invisible killer, Death Itself, stalks its victims and kills them off in creatively gruesome ways after they initially cheat death. The fifth addition contains an awesome twist at the end which in hindsight you should have seen coming throughout the entire movie. Pay close attention. The only downside is (SPOILER ALERT) that none of the characters throughout the series really survive.

19) Let the Right One In (Lat den Ratte Komma In) (2008)

Please watch the Swedish version, and power through the subtitles. This is a horror movie that is tragic on multiple levels, as it deals with a lonely and bullied boy who so happens to live next door to a pubescent vampire. When her benefactor dies, we see how the main character’s life will also unfold, and what lies in his future. A must-see film that is more than just your average horror movie.

20) Terrifier (2017)

This movie definitely gets back to basics by paying homage to the original slasher classics. Art the Clown, who we are originally introduced to in the 2013 movie All Hallow’s Eve (also worth a watch), is a vicious horror movie villain who kills just for kicks. He also subverts the horror movie trope by using a weapon which was previously considered off-limits to horror movie villains, especially those with supernatural abilites (mostly, anyway). This movie also contains one of the bloodiest deaths in recent horror movie history. I like the use of practical effects over the often-overdone CGI. What is Art the Clown? Deranged killer? Demonic entity? Who cares? Its all good fun. Watch it now on Netflix.

I’ll probably be back again some time in the future with a further 20 horror movies that are worth a watch, because there are so many of them. To everyone, take care during these uncertain times.

[cerastes]

So, I’m at That Part in Oregairu again and

Man, okay... Hayama hates Hachiman’s methods, but he knew that this could only be solved if he did that, something only he could do, something only he would dare to do, and hated himself for an eternal 6 hours because he could to turn to no one else to Save The Status Quo(tm) he loves so much. The pangs of guilt are palpable. That’s one thing.

Then there’s Yukino. She didn’t exactly hate the way he did things due to her being severely emotionally and emphatically stunted... Until recently. Now that she can actually rationalize this, now that she has seen the consequences and results of Hachiman doing things his way with the School Festival Arc, she knows what it entails for him to do this, and she hates it. She’s still not at a place where she can put it in words, “It frustrates me that I can’t explain why, but...”, this must be the first time in years, if not ever, that she’s actually angry for someone else, for how someone else treats themselves, for how someone else is so eerily willing to commit social suicide, to play the “I Sacrifice Myself” card in order to ‘flawlessly’ solve a problem, because, you see, it’s not flawless at all. The kind of ‘selfless act’ that is often celebrated and romanticized in other pieces of similar media, becoming a scapegoat yourself to ensure the solution of something, no matter how noble and well thought out that is, is immediately admonished. Yukino, whose introduction makes her the single least empathetic person in the world, has grown enough that she grows furious over Hachiman pulling off like this again, to an even deeper, darker depth than before. It’s a dagger to the heart, self-sacrifice is often oh so romanticized and idealized in media, but... Is that really the way we would act? Would we really be proud of someone we hold dear in our lives destroying themselves? Is that something to congratulate and celebrate? This was the moment I actually started liking Yukino, because buddy, I did not like her before this moment.

But, see, that’s not the end of it. Hayama and Yukino both are Rubix Cubes of issues. What about the opinion of someone closer to the “light” of society? Someone not emotionally stunted?

Well,

This is the real haymaker. Hayama is one thing, Yukino is another similar thing, the only thing truly differentiating the two of them being the level of familiarity they have with Hachiman. But Yui? Yui is, pardon the expression, the perfect ‘Normie’. Yui is not emotionally stunted, has no dark past, isn’t haunted by events that lead her to put on a perpetual mask or to become incapable of empathy like our two previous subjects, she’s as regular as they come, in the best way possible: Funny, cheerful, with her quirks, pros and cons. A perfectly normal person that stands out because she’s not a spaghetti of issues like our other beloved subjects. It’s precisely because of that that her words ring loudest and harshest: She, who has shown to be a conformist, she, who takes comfort in the status quo, she, who sees things from the lens of an Average Jane unburdened from the crosses the others carry on their shoulders, she, she, has this to say. 

It’s not too different from what Yukino had to say. Not too different, but the nuance, the manner, the means, oh, it changes it all. No riddles, no sophisms, a straight, honest truth loosed truer than any arrow: “It’s not about whether you get the job done or not, Hachiman, it’s what it costs to get it done, because the way you do things, it’s not worth winning if victories hurt you this much. How do you think we, who like you as a person and love you as a friend, feel when we see you use yourself so nonchalantly as a sacrifice?”

And it stings. It aches like salt upon wounds. Up until now, we’re celebrating the reckless, brazen ways in which this loner is ‘effectively’ dealing with all problems thrown at him, and then, we realize: This is nothing to celebrate. This is nothing to romanticize. Just because a small, closed circle of friends understands the meaning and depth of our decision to use ourselves as sacrifices to bring forth a solution doesn’t mean they should simply chuckle and say, “Well done”. They are in their right to feel upset at this, you could say it’s maybe even their duty to feel upset, because it’s simply agonizing to bare witness to a loved one’s self-destruction, regardless of the cause.

The message, the build up, the lighting, the colors, the music, the way the voice talent deliver the scene, especially Yui’s voice actress, who acted the hell out of this scene, all of these aspects work together to bring forth what I believe to be the strongest scene in Oregairu. It’s painful, agonizingly so, but it’s necessary, and from here, we go to a series of legitimately uncomfortable and tense episodes. The use of silences, of ‘camerawork’, of everything, it just hurts so genuinely for such a good reason, because, and let me perhaps dip my knee deep into the puddle here, the word “crisis” finds its roots in the Greek word “krisis”, meaning “turning point of a disease”: It’s not necessarily negative. It can be a positive or negative turning point, one that can decide whether we heal or die. This is the krisis in Oregairu, the turning point, where growth becomes just as possible as stagnation, and you really, really hope it’s not stagnation, for the love of everything, you really hope so.

It is, without a doubt, my favorite scene in all of the franchise.

[borisbubbles]

Eurovision  2010s: 25 - 20

25. Francesca Michelin - “No degree of separation” Italy 2016

Man, we’re deep into the endgame and at this point every elimination starts to mentally hurt. 

“Nessun grado di separazione” is a fantastic song. it is a moody, melodic, genuinely touching showcase of palpable social anxiety, brightened up by frivolous jiggles and Animal Crossing-inspired staging. 😍 Its lyrics tackle the subject of “falling in love” with disarming accuracy and poetic justice. When you fall in love with somebody, it really is a question of resistance, of trying to stay level-headed and rational, of trying to not speak from the mind, not the heart, and then flare of emotion lights up from the inside, carving a path in your chest, until

THERE IS NO DEGREE OF SEPARATION

THERE IS NO DEGREE OF HESITATION

THERE IS NO DEGREE OF SPACE BETWEEN US

WE ARE STARS ALIGNED TOGETHER

DANCING THROUGH THE SKY, WE ARE SHININ’

Hands down my favourite language shift ever. Each time Francesca delivers it, time stands still, as you take in the expanse of the universe, the beauty of love and the profoundness of life. 

Naturalmente, Francesca is also a fantastic performer for me. It really pains me that she was less good in the Grand Final, because her SF performance was genuinely worthy of a top five spot on this ranking. Yet, at the same time, Francesca is clearly upset at herself that she was worse and god my overthinking, underachieving perfectionist-with-a-crippingly-fear-of-not-being-good-enough self can RELATE SO HARD to that. 😭

*YOU* ARE PRECIOUS, Francesca. Grazie.

Easily the best entry Italy have ever brought at Eurovision...

________________________________________________________________

24. Mahmood - “Soldi” Italy 2019

...until “Soldi”. Alessandro is mah MOOD

What a delight “Soldi” was. Shame on me though. Between, all the madness of Hatari’s assholery, Serhat’s qualification, ZalaGasper’s interview gold, Bilal’s revamp, Michela & Miki’s staging miracles, Sergey’s struggles to keep his homosexuality under wraps, Duncan’s staging disaster, Jurij’s bedroom eyes and 2019: A Kate Oddyssey, I had completely forgotten about Mahmood.

Which made the rediscovery of “Soldi” all the greater. 😍 THIS 👏 SONG 👏 FUCKING 👏 SLAPS. 👏 even the B-material things such as the snappy camerawork, the arabic middle-eight and rhyming “Ramadan” with “Jackie Chan” are mindblowingly awesome. 

It hard to pick a favourite aspect though. The backdrop, the beat, the dancing, Mahmood’s vocals and miming all come together in a song that is supereffective in getting the pain across while also simultaneously remaining fun, addictive and highly energetic. Mahmood completely DISMANTLES bad parenting while also clowning the xenophobic pieces of shit that tried to bully him off Eurovision. It’s that combination of genuine emotional pulling, righteous ownage and let’s face it, a fucking amazing song that makes coming back to Mahmood for another listen the easiest decision ever. *CLAP*CLAP*, motherfuckers. 👏

________________________________________________________________

23. Lea Sirk - “Hvala, ne!” Slovenia 2018

[2018 Review here] (shared with ZiBBZ)

HVALA SLAY SLAY

Best moment of 2018: Lea Sirk becomes the best shock qualifier of ALL TIMES. Honestly, a trash fairy with a trap song that she wrote in under two hours has NO BUSINESS being this good, but it is. 😍

 Remember the Israeli’s that cheered for Hatari? “Hvale, ne!” is the jury equivalent to that. It’s a song that righteously calls out the FAKENESS of the music industry <3 THAT WAS ALSO LIKED BY THE JURIES <333332456 😍😍😍

Besides this “Hvala, ne!” is a wild ride taking us to lands of cotton candy braids and trashbag couture with an impeccable, show-stopping choreography, an earworm of a beat and just general kick ass energy. Lea operates on a near-inhuman level of pure CONTENT. Every second she delivers something of value, be it choreography or a snarky note or a hilarious facial expression “Hvala ne!” is riddled with little nuggets like that, which are hard to list in text, so here are a  couple of gifs:

and yes, of course, the “break”. 😍

Being able to pull that off not ONCE, but TWICE and STILL making it look fresh and novel <3 “Hvala, ne!” is effortlessly sleek, unapolegetically non-conformist, shamelessly gimmicky and 100% pure awesomeness. Slovenia may be a tiny country geographically but they burst with raw TALENT. Obrigado sim! 

ps: Slovenia reportedly hating Lea now because she was trashtalking ZalaGasper’s victory over RAIVEN <3  lmfao Lea <3 ANGELS <3

________________________________________________________________

22. Who See - “Igranka” Montenegro 2013

💃 Vodim te na IGRANKU 💃 💃 Na na na na  IGRANKU 💃 💃 Ku ku ku ku IGRANKU 💃 💃 Vodim te na IGRANKU 💃

I should not get ahead of myself, but jesus fuck, what a TRIP. 

So anyway, are Who See dressed like austronauts to signal that “Igranka” isn’t of this fucking planet, or? “Igranka” a fun party song, in which Who See tramp about dressed like Armstrong and Lightyear, flanked by 2013′s ubiquitous dubstep. Good? Sure.🤔 Funny? Certainly. 😁 However, nothing superexciting so far.

Until... 

Who See go from a weird heteronormative rap effort that is lowkey fun to an utterly unhinged acid trip the SECOND Nina Zizic is lifted onto the stage by a dumbwaiter and then proceeds to collect every scalp in the gaylaxy. Remember how I said 2013 had EPIC female entrances? This is a top five entrance probably in the history of live performances. SLAIN, DECEASED, EVAPORATED every single time. 

Europe’s cyborg seraph.

and I mean, you’d think this one-time gimmick would get stale over time, but “Ingranka” actually gets better with every listen. I’m at the point where I can NO LONGER resist the ululating siren call to don a visor and a pair of pvc wings, and make overdramatic shouty entrances everywhere just like Nina the few times I choose to leave my mother’s basement. VODIM TE NA IGRANKU. 

________________________________________________________________

21. Cleo - “My Slowianie”  Poland 2014

CLEO... Donatan?

Is this Donatan shade for not being there? GOOD! We at BorisBubbles (so basically, I) believe in gender equality and since the wymyn do all of the work here, I’ve decided to not credit him. 🤭

Anyway, let’s just JUMP right in because dammit “My Slowianie” is such a RIDE. It’s entire objective appears to be... to convince everyone that ~Slavic Women~ are better, at everything than non-slavic women and, well, being slavic myself this message speaks to me. Not to mention that Cleo teaches us this paramount interculteral lesson in the most hilariously blunt fashion ever. 

SPECIAL THINGS WE HAVE IN OUR GENES

MAKES US PROUD OF OUR NATURAL SHAPES

CREAM AND BUTTER TASTE SO GOOD

WE PREPARED FOR YOU DELICIOUS FOOD

OUR BEAUTY’S FAMOUS ALL OVER THE WORLD

YOU GOTTA SEE FOR YOURSELF AND THEN YOU WILL KNOW 😉

and dammit Cleo doesn’t underdeliver, doesn’t she? Three minutes of loud in your face SUPERIORITY. 😍 One could argue that “My slowianie” is SOCIALLY REPRESSING WOMEN, like many terfs did but like... get over you -- Sophie Ellis-Bextor, BorisBubbles. I don’t think any of us have the right to tell (other) women what they can or can’t do because of their breasts and oestrogen. These ladies agreed to do this song/act and are completely facetious while doing it. It’s a spoof. Laugh. or don’t laugh, I don’t care, really. Be a humourless non-slavic frump if you must. As far as I am concerned, “My slowianie” is a thing of CHARMING BEAUTY :shakes what his momma gave him:/ :claps his hands to this music:

and in this update we say goodbye to Italy, Montenegro and Poland. Read my thoughts on them below:

ITALY

Italy before their return is one of the biggest snoozefests in Eurovision and now look at that chart. They were near impeccable in this decade and hopefully can win a third time soon (honestly the fact that they came so close to winning four times in this decade and still didn’t is one of the biggest mysteries of 2010s Eurovision imo.)

MONTENEGRO

Montenegro are the Georgia of the Balkans: they often go for experimental shit, just cuz they can. Unfortunately, their shit often is just that: shit. 

POLAND

Poland at Eurovision is a big ball of meh, mostly because they can’t, at all, select songs or entrants that sound good. Cleo and Michal are forever though, so it’s not completely without merit. 

[getoffthesoapbox]

[GS] Goblin Slayer’s Foundational Sublayers

“Don't worry about the snakes in your garden when you've got spiders in your bed.”

I hope I’m not stepping on a landmine by posting about this particular show, given it’s controversial nature, but I’m quite floored by the layers I’m discovering in Goblin Slayer now that I’ve watched the first two episodes. I guess I’ll preface this with a couple disclaimers, then work out the rest under the cut.

First of all, I know nothing about Goblin Slayer other than that it is a light novel and has a manga variant. I’ve never read either, and have no intention of reading either in the near future. How the story unfolds or whether or not its intriguing and gripping premise devolves into pointless harem hijinks, I know not. If it’s merely a male power fantasy or if it has more substance, I know not. These things I will discover as they come within the anime. My post at this time is concerning what is right in front of me, the two episodes that are out. Whether the story can make good on what its more subtler layers are promising remains to be seen. 

Second of all, this post will not delve into the controversial elements of the two episodes other than to refer to them lightly as necessary. While I believe the human mind is stronger than common wisdom implies, I’m not interested in fighting people over what should have been warned or not, so I won’t be messing with it. It just bogs down the flow of a post to have such things, and it goes against my principles, so I’ll be stepping around it entirely. 

Preamble over. Let’s get crackin’.

Edgy Exploitation Fantasy or Psychological Horror Fantasy?

There used to be a subgenre of horror filmmaking called exploitation or grindhouse films. Some of the discussion I’m seeing about Goblin Slayer reminds me a bit of the controversies surrounding these shadier elements of filmmaking throughout film history. Artists are always pushing boundaries, touching taboos, and getting bit for going too far. This is the nature of art, and the whole process is fine--boundaries should be set by culture, but they should also be poked and prodded by subculture. It’s an eternal dance that is necessary and desirable for the health of a society. Go too far one way, and you’re too rigid. Go too far the other way, you’re unable to get your bearings. There is a time and a place to explore exploitation, and artists need to be free to go where the normal civilized person cannot. (Or at least, that’s what I believe.)

Where does Goblin Slayer fall, then? On the surface, one might say it easily falls into an exploitation subgenre. The first episode alone features men being viciously murdered and women facing far worse, all to set up the Heroic Entrance of the blank slate (quite literally, as he has no face) Audience-Insert Hero character. This Audience-Insert Hero Character then proceeds to Destroy All The Bad Things and save the day. In episode two, we find out the Audience-Insert Hero Character not only saves the day, but he’s the Only One who saves the day for the Little Guy and no one but his Harem, who he doesn’t notice because he’s Too Manly, appreciates him. 

If the above were all that Goblin Slayer had to it (and perhaps future episodes will truly devolve into such a premise), then I would agree with those who criticize its exploitation of its female (and male) characters for the sake of elevating its hero and allowing its audience the opportunity to both be titillated by the violence being done to the victims and enjoy the fantasy of rescuing the damsels in distress who can be rescued. In some ways, Goblin Slayer certainly isn’t shy about indulging in its exploitative opportunities. But I do think there’s more to it than merely the exploitation layer, and that’s why I haven’t dropped it. 

I think Goblin Slayer’s world building is some of the strongest I’ve seen in an anime fantasy setting in a long time, and the first episode left me with a genuine sense of horror that I haven’t felt in a long time. Horror is much like humor--it’s easy to spot and hard to do right. Jump scares and spooky sounds are one thing, but narrative horror--the kind you’d find in The King in Yellow or The Turn of the Screw--is much more difficult. The kind of horror that creeps up on you, that gets you thinking, that’s much harder. The same is true of slapstick comedy--it’s easy to do body humor, but difficult to do the more complicated forms. Goblin Slayer does an excellent job building its world into something truly horrific in its first two episodes, and while this does elevate its hero to truly “heroic” proportions, it also emphasizes just how difficult, unrewarding, thankless and necessary a task this man has undertaken is, and the depths of the evil which has snuck in by the back door. 

But more than the world building, more than the harem elements, Goblin Slayer gets so. much. right. on two very important narrative levels most people never even think about: the evolutionary level and the mythological/religious level. These two levels are buried beneath our stories, and most of the time in the rush of planning characters and plots and themes and the “things of heaven” so to speak, writers don’t even realize the “hell” at their feet, the foundation upon which they’re building. When a writer gets it right, you know, because people are drawn to it without being able to understand why, even if the plot, characters, and “themes” are badly written or terrible or repugnant morally. When a story gets the foundation layers right, there’s something in it that really calls an audience’s attention, for good or ill, and that’s what I want to explore here today. 

The Serpent In The Garden & The Heart

What struck me about the first two episodes of Goblin Slayer was that this world was fucked inside and out. This is the layer of myth and religion--whenever a story starts with a premise like that, we’re going straight back to the origin stories of mankind--the angry gods and goddesses, the banishment from paradises, the murdering of first brothers. Even if we’re secular people, we all carry within us the DNA of generations upon generations of people who held this mythology within their lives and blood. It influences us in ways we don’t even recognize to this day. 

Goblin Slayer makes a clear-cut case for the evils of the goblins themselves, and they’re the easiest to address first. The goblins are this story’s initial enemy, the “serpent in the garden” to to speak. They are the thing, according to the Hero, who is keeping the World from Paradise. The source of the fall, so to speak. And the story does an excellent job of establishing the horror of these creatures. In small groups or one-on-one, outside of their nest, they’re no threat at all, much like a lone rat might be or a lone wasp or a lone termite. But enter their nest and their layer, ignore them to let them multiply, and you’ll soon find yourself battling an infestation of the little buggers. These goblins are nasty little creatures--smart as dogs and rapacious as bed bugs. They hide from larger, scarier monsters, and loot poor, ill-defended villages, pillaging for supplies and women, who they drag back to their layers. Much like pillagers throughout humanity, these creatures swam what they want and devour it in whatever way strikes them. They’re truly horrific creatures.

Now this alone would be rather one-sided if the goblins were the only evil the story highlighted. But fortunately, there is a second layer that touches on the snakes that exist in the heart of every creature. Why are the goblin infestations increasing? Because humans don’t feel like dealing with them. They’re a hassle (like pests), they’re easy to kill as long as you don’t get swarmed, and there are bigger fish to fry (likely legitimately, but that hasn’t been justified yet). Worse, they tend to attack poorer villages that can’t afford to put up a town defense much less hire adventurers to assist them. The bounties aren’t worth it for anyone but the greenhorns looking for experience. So much of the destruction caused by these green menaces is due to human greed and sloth--”strong” humans are too important to waste time on “small” fry like goblins. Greenhorns are then sent to the slaughter--the ones who survive become regular adventurers and soon escape the grind of goblin-hunting while the unlucky ones get slaughtered or worse. 

Even with these two sides of horror--nature and the heart of man--this story would fall flat if it didn’t have one last piece of the triangle. Generally when stories fail at this level, they fail because their protagonist is “above” the serpent within. Fortunately for Goblin Slayer, the Goblin Slayer himself is not this kind of character. He may have a harem and he may be “heroic,” but the first two episodes of the story do not justify him or his actions. I think it might be easy to take his backstory flashback as a justification, but there are a few key moments that the story emphasizes which, in my opinion, make it clear that the flashback is merely to explain why he’s obsessed with his mission to eradicate the goblins, not to justify his actions. The first moment is in the first episode when he slaughters the helpless goblin children--while his words may be “correct,” they neither convince the Priestess nor do the visuals agree with him--he’s portrayed visually as an overbearing monster bearing down on the hapless creatures. In the second episode, he attempts to justify himself to the Priestess again, but what we see from her is not her nodding in agreement or having a Sudden Realization of his Righteousness--instead she is praying as they’re slaughtering the goblins. She still views him as wrong, even if this is a necessary evil in order to protect their own kind. 

On top of the Priestess’s alternative viewpoint and the camerawork, we have his Childhood Friend, whose pain and loneliness is emphasized. His work isn’t justified by her story, it’s criticized. While he’s off chasing down this endless revenge quest, he’s hurting a woman who has cared for him for most of his life. He’s missing out on the beauty of her company and her companionship, on the brighter side of life, on “heaven” so to speak. Her uncle wants her to give up on him, and understandably calls him crazy. But she is faithful in waiting, and in hoping that one day he’ll turn toward her. To be fair, the story does try to play things evenly rather than simply criticizing its main character (it does want you to root for the Goblin Slayer), and it does this through the Guild Clerk, who in my opinion is the least trustworthy of the heroines so far. She may “value” the Goblin Slayer, but she’s certainly willing to hand out goblin missions to unqualified greenhorns and use them as cannon fodder when necessary. The story makes it clear that she has a serpent in her heart as well. 

What I see here, with these three key elements in play, is the set up for a huge redemption arc not only for the Goblin Slayer, but also for the world at large. We’re starting off with both a fall from paradise (the goblin infestations rising) and the Problem of Malice/Evil (the indifference of the other adventurers and the obsession of the Goblin Slayer), both of which will have to be addressed and rectified before the end. It’s clear from the opening that, much like Guts from Berserk, the Goblin Slayer cannot complete his mission alone. He is not going to be able to actualize himself as a person and as a human being and free himself from his obsession until he is shown a bigger picture through the perspectives of the people who come into contact with him. 

The exploitation in the first two episodes to me seems to be ultimately necessary for establishing the sheer magnitude of the stakes in this story not just for the main hero and heroine, but also for the world itself. It is a world that has turned a blind eye to injustice in favor of greed, a world that is not functioning with proper order and is allowing chaos to flourish because people are trying to avoid facing what they don’t want to face. If this theme carries on throughout the entirety of the story, and if both the Goblin Slayer and the world change by the end, I think it could have the makings of quite a satisfying quest on the most fundamental of levels, even if it indulges in a few harem hijinks. 

Evolution On Display

This might be kind of a funny thing to notice, but I think the evolutionary layer is a key layer in storytelling that perhaps isn’t acceptable to modern sensibilities despite resonating deeply due to the nature of evolution.

On average, women tend to flock toward the men at the top of a hierarchy. These men, evolutionarily speaking, are the most likely to be able to offer security and safety for the woman and her offspring. Since only in the modern age have medicine and work opportunities become available to allow women to not rely so heavily on men’s assistance, this is something buried deep within the female psyche that they most likely don’t even realize is operating within them. 

Harem stories are annoying to me in general because I tend to find them unrealistic in some senses (generally the male figures in them are not what women themselves would pick as the “top of the crop” which is why women can so quickly pinpoint a male fantasy character vs. a legitimate top male). Male fantasy characters tend to be average schmucks whose only selling point is that they’re “nice” and can help solve the girls’ problems. Characters like that tend to be off-putting for female audiences because let’s face it, in real life you kind of need more to sell than just your niceness. ;) So in most harem stories of the anime variety, the harems the males gather to them are not earned the way real top males earn their harems. 

Take, for example, a star actor or a star sports hero--these men work their asses off night and day to rise above the crowd. They may get several girls who like them when they’re first starting their craft, say, in high school. By college they have a respectable harem of ladies who are interested. By the time they make their first break in the industry, maybe they have a new girl every night if they want. By the time they’re famous, they most likely can have whoever they want whenever they want. This is the nature of what it means to be on top. And this makes sense, because think about what comes “with” being a star of this kind--immense wealth, immense notoriety, immense resources. On a biological level, it only makes sense that these men would be incredibly attractive to women, women who might not mind sharing if it means having a piece of such a man. 

What I love about Goblin Slayer is that it actually accurately gets this element. Women see the worth of men and the likelihood of them making it to the “top” of the hierarchy earlier than men do. This is why the Childhood Friend’s conversation with her uncle in episode two was so interesting to me--he sees nothing of worth in the Goblin Slayer, but she already is seeing a man who has the ability to secure the life and resources she needs. She’s seeing the future while her uncle can only see the worthless sack of shit in the present. You see this effect also on the Priestess, who the Goblin Slayer rescues. She sees his worth as a protector, thus security. The Guild Girl also sees his worth in the status sector--he’s the Only One Who Will Fight Goblins, which is a status. The reason he gets ridiculed by other adventurers is because they don’t understand that he’s carving a niche status for himself (he himself doesn’t understand this either), but they instinctively fear that niche status. Ridicule comes from an instinctive fear of excellence. Whenever a man (or woman) begins reaching for excellence, it stirs up anxieties among the people around them who know subconsciously that they’re not striving for the same thing. 

Thus we end up with this realistic harem that actually works for once because it’s based (most likely subconsciously on the writer’s part) on actual evolutionary development. The Goblin Slayer is in the process of earning his status, his resources, and his harem. He is doing that with single-minded attention toward his goal, which is ultimately the eradication of goblins. Now, his goal is wrong, and he’ll have to temper it, but it’s an important part of the process guiding him toward the top of the hierarchy, where he’ll find the happiness he doesn’t know he’s looking for now. 

Why Fantasy Stories Aimed At Men Still Matter

I wasn’t going to go here when I started my post, but apparently I have something about it I want to say. 

There is certainly a push now to make stories of all shapes accessible to women, and I absolutely have no problem with this. Expanding the audiences for stories is perfectly fine (and smart from a business-standpoint!). But at the same time, I think something has been lost for male audiences in the process, and for female audiences as well, in removing the opportunity for a truly male-oriented worldview for (some) stories.

Stories are essentially a way to understand each other, to bridge the gap between our heads and other people’s. It is as helpful for a woman to watch a male harem fantasy as it is for a man to watch a female reverse harem fantasy--both offer windows into the dreams and wishes of each gender and give clues as to what kinds of personality traits are worth cultivating and what traits should be snuffed out as quickly as possible. 

The problem comes when one gender gets a monopoly over the other, or when one gender becomes naval-gazing and self-indulgent at the expense of the other, which is why (understandably) we’re seeing a movement toward stories with broader perspectives. The only downside to a broader perspective, of course, is that you lose intimacy and you lose the ability to enter a specific type of person’s worldview. (This brings me to mind of something like Lolita, which probably would not be able to be published in the modern day.) When you can’t narrow the perspective of a story to reflect a single mindset, you definitely lose some flavor along the way. Whether that flavor is worth losing or not is probably up to each individual viewer. 

The other problem that I’m seeing at least with recent storylines in anime is that even as they’re extending the narrative umbrella to female audiences, in the process they’re losing the aspirational aspect of men’s journeys. These stories aimed at men are no longer guiding them toward becoming the kind of men who can attract the women they want and be respected by their peers; instead they try to placate young men who have made nothing of themselves by offering them women who will accept them “as they are.” I see the same thing happening in stories for girls--girls aren’t aspiring to become the best partners they can for the men at the top of the hierarchy, instead they’re being told they can just “be themselves” and the top males will land in their lap for no reason at all simply because they’re the heroine. I find these kinds of stories to be dangerous in a great many ways because they foster false expectations and senses of entitlement that aren’t helpful when navigating difficult gender dynamics in the real world. 

What does this tangent have to do with Goblin Slayer? Well, as far as I can tell, Goblin Slayer is getting this right. The Goblin Slayer is not a layabout useless sack of crap whose childhood friend has to wake him up every day by jiggling her unrealistic assets in his face. He’s a man who is making his way in the world, a man who has a purpose he chose for himself, a man who pays for his rent, a man who gets himself up every day, a man who politely escorts the lady of the house where she wants to go, a man who is respectful and civilized. He is a man “in process,” which is a great place to start with a hero. Of course there is still growth--he needs to become more than merely a goblin murderer. If he wants to earn the harem he’s beginning to attract, he needs to expand as a person. But what I appreciate about this story is that it establishes the basics of what one needs to begin attracting the opposite sex--a job, industriousness, and excellence in one’s field of work. What’s even better is that this story is establishing that this can all be done without looks being a factor--the Goblin Slayer is never seen without his helmet, which means he’s attracting people based on what he does and how he acts. In other words, the Goblin Slayer is an aspirational figure, even with his flaws. 

Stories like this are necessary for young men so that they can see themselves as something other than useless layabouts who need a woman to wake them up in the morning. Stories like this are also necessary for the brave women who care to overlook the male perspective in order to gain understanding of how much work a man has to put in to even be able to attract any notice, and to what men are looking for both in relationships and in their lives in general. I guess maybe I as a viewer just like to see this aspect respected and hope that stories won’t be afraid to regain a bit of what has been lost in transition here. Again, I don’t want to lose stories that appeal to everyone, but I think it’s fine for some stories to focus specifically on one gender in order to help work through many of the problems and challenges that gender faces in the world. Goblin Slayer by itself can’t do that alone, and I’m not even saying it’s the best variant of this genre, but at the moment it’s getting things right and I like to praise things when I see them getting things right. 

He Who Runs Away Today Lives To Run Another Day

I hope I haven’t offended anyone with this post (it’s hard to talk about controversial subjects without offending at least half the room), but if I have I offer my sincere apologies. This was meant to be an exploration of the thoughts and feelings this story and some of the controversy surrounding it stirred up within me, and I’m not really sure I accomplished much more than merely getting some thoughts out on paper, but it is what it is. 

Whether you love Goblin Slayer or hate it or are indifferent to it, thank you for making it all the way to the end of this and I hope we’ll cross paths again.

Until next time!

[starspatter]

Heroes and Thieves, Ch. 6

Title: Heroes and Thieves Fandom/Universe: BTAS, pre/post-RotJ flashback

Summary: A story about second chances, healing, and having hope.

Rating: PG-13, for references to character death, child psychological torture and trauma.

Genre: Romance/Family/Friendship/Hurt/Comfort

Word Count: 3,791 Previous Chapters: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5

Also on ff.net and AO3. In which Dick is surprisingly racist towards clones.

Two birds on a wire One says "come on" and the other says "I'm tired" The sky is overcast and I'm sorry One more or one less Nobody's worried

-Regina Spektor, "Two Birds"

Then.

Once their guest had left, Tim turned to Dick with a wounded air.

“How about giving me some warning next time before someone shows up, huh?  A little heads-up would’ve been nice.”

Dick’s smile didn’t falter.

“What, did she catch you doing something embarrassing?”

Tim skewered him a look of disgust.

“Do you have to make everything sound dirty?”

“Sorry, sorry.  …I’m surprised you’re still doing ‘that’ after all these years though.”

Tim shrugged with a heavy sigh.  “Was just testing to see if I still could, I guess.  I messed up on the landing anyway.”

“You probably just need to work on your form some more.  It has been a while since I last saw you brush up on any techniques, they’re bound to get a bit rusty.  If you want, I can still coach you…”

Tim’s lips tightened.

“Forget it.  It’s not worth it.”

“Are you sure?  That girl seemed pretty impressed by it. She’s the one you were talking about earlier, right?”  Dick nodded in sage observation.  “She’s cute; nice face, decent rack- ow!”  He rubbed his arm as it was abruptly met with an annoyed punch.  “Hey, it was a compliment.”

“…Didn’t sound like one.”

“Would you prefer I said she has a mighty fine ass?”  He waggled his brows and grinned provocatively, despite wincing from the pain.  Kid could still hit pretty hard when he wanted to. “Not as fine as mine though.”

“Shut up before I shove a dumbbell up there.”

Dick clutched his behind in mock dread at the threat.

“Seriously though, she’s obviously into you.”

Tim rolled his eyes. “The way I see it, from where I’m standing, she’s more into you.”

“Oh ho, do I detect a note of jealousy?”

“No,” Tim denied hotly, though his cheeks told a different story.  “It’s just that you’re being super-gross about it.  You know you’re acting like Bruce by coming onto every giddy schoolgirl and her mom who walks in through the door.”

Dick’s smirk jerked slightly.

“Wow, okay dude, we’re really going there.”  It was his turn to be hurt by insensitivity.  “You didn’t need to go that far.  I’ll have you know this and that are completely different.”

“How so?”

“I approach these things from a sole marketing perspective.  Purely professional.  It’s called ‘show business’, bro.”

“Uh-huh.  This coming from the guy who just lied about his scars to make himself look good.  I suppose ‘that’s’ also part of your advertising strategy?”

“Hey, it’s not like it was a total lie.  That really did happen, you know – minus the ‘falling debris’ part.  …Besides, what else would you have me say?”

Tim shook his head, keeping his voice low.  “…I don’t know.”

Dick seized on the telling silence.  “You are attracted to her, aren’t you?”

“I am not.”

“It’s okay, I can see why. It’s all right to admit these things, you know.  You don’t have to hide it.”

“I’m not hiding anything.”

The firm, yet flustered defiance only further confirmed Dick’s suspicion.

“Heh heh, little Timmy’s got a crush~”

He tousled Tim’s hair teasingly, to which the boy scowled.

“I do not.”  He pushed the invading hand away in indignation.  “Will you cut that out already?  I’m not a kid anymore.”

Dick lowered his limb in disappointment.

“Okay, okay.  Sorry.”  Despite insistence otherwise, it delighted Dick that Tim was finally exhibiting some of the youthful desire – if not exuberance – he’d missed out on through his teenage years.  “Trust me though, I have no interest in someone her age.  She’s all yours.”

“Look, will you just drop it?” Tim snapped bluntly.  “It’s none of your freakin’ business.”

Dick exhaled, clicking his tongue.  If only Tim could be more honest with his feelings, true to himself – though he was painfully aware of how excruciatingly difficult that must be, what with everything the boy had been through.  To be fair, he had his own troubles genuinely opening his heart to others, after all the times it had been broken and betrayed before.  …He could only imagine how terrifying it must be for Tim, to allow someone else – a complete and total stranger – to get close by entering into his currently (semi-)stable and secure – if supremely secluded life, experience that kind of risky emotion again. Breach the many walls and defensive barriers he had set up around himself, upset the plainly precarious balance that was still a struggle to barely maintain.  So as much as he wanted to continue coaxing and clowning – kidding around, he agreed to leave it alone for now, raising both palms in admitted defeat.

“Okay, I get it.  I won’t bother you about it anymore.”

The subject successfully dismissed, Tim attuned towards the boxes in the back.

“So did you want me to help with moving this stuff or what?”

“Yeah, I needed to clear out some old things to make space for new equipment.  Trying to tidy up the place more, getting rid of useless junk and whatnot.  …Although most of it’s probably going up to the storeroom in the attic anyway.  Sorry to bother you for this; I’d do all the lifting myself, but with my back…”

“Don’t mention it, it’s the least I can do to repay you.”

“Thanks, I appreciate it.”

Tim knelt by one of the cartons as Dick set to work sifting and sorting, organizing according to some arbitrary system that ostensibly only made sense to him.

“Christ, how much crap do you have here?  Seriously, what even is half this junk?  I knew you had all kinds of odd ends lying around, but I didn’t realize it amounted to this much.  Do you ever throw anything away?”

Dick shrugged.

“What can I say, I’m a hoarder by nature.  Keeping keepsakes is my hobby.   …Well, more like a habit, I guess.  Why do you think we had a trophy room in the basement?  It wasn’t originally Bruce’s idea, I can tell you that.”

Tim remained quiet as he poked through a large collection of CDs, containing a few recognizable but mostly random titles by various indie bands and artists he’d never heard of.

“Man, you’ve got weird taste in music.”

“Hey, don’t knock the classics.  Those are precious goods, be careful with those.”

In spite of his scoffing, Tim picked up one of the discs that appealed to him, and was almost about to subconsciously slip the item under his oversized hoodie – an old, old habit of his own – before remembering he didn’t have to resort to sneaking or stealing when he could just ask.

“Can I borrow this?”

Dick didn’t even twist to look, implicitly trusting in his little brother’s judgment.  “Yeah sure, go ahead.”

Tim breathed out in relief as he pocketed the prize with permission.  That was a close call.  Borderline kleptomaniac compulsions hadn’t surfaced like that in a long time, but then, it was only another minor checkbox on the extensive, exhaustive list of psychotic symptoms he was suffering from today.

There was another entry that caught his eye, different from the others.  It had no hard case or album cover; just a plain, simple jacket labeled with marker:

For Babs.

Tim wondered if it was a mix tape – surely Dick wouldn’t have tried to record something himself? He couldn’t tell whether it was a gift Dick planned to give but never worked up the courage to – or something Barbara sent back after (one of numerous) breakup(s).

…Maybe Joker was right. Being in love with someone seemed like way more hassle than it was worth.  Hell, just watching those two go back and forth between affection and anger even back then was tiring.  Aggravating.

At any rate, he left burning curiosity alone, not wanting to intrude too much on Dick’s privacy (years ago he would’ve taunted his brother with the juicy bit of exposing bait himself, but that was then, when he was less mature and still found amusement in such things), and moved on to another container.  As soon as he saw the contents inside, he balked a bit, heartbeat spiking.  Aching.  It was a family photo album, full of fond memories from the Flying Graysons’ circus days. His hands trembled as he flipped tentatively through the pages, unable to tear away even though it made him uncomfortable for a number of reasons.  Paranoid of polaroids.  Anything involving camerawork tended to make him queasy, though he could typically tolerate homages to others at least.  These were different from the blown-up, polished posters on the wall though; the images portrayed within were more intimate, unscripted.  Candid, captured moments of a close-knit clan, happy as a clam – treasured remnants of childhood innocence and bliss combined with parental pampering.

“This must have been such a cool place to grow up.”

“…It was.”

Glancing back at the receptacle, buried at the bottom was another set of snapshots: a framed photograph of Dick and Barbara together (him smiling smugly straight at her in puppy-like adoration while she beamed brightly at the viewer instead), and a worn print of the former in graduation garb next to Bruce, who had his paw wrapped proudly on the other’s shoulder.  Scrawled on the top left-hand corner in Bruce’s surprisingly haphazard handwriting was a short congratulatory message:

Good luck at college, Dick.

Tim recalled how Dick told him the story of Bruce missing his graduation from Gotham State University, shortly before the two split up as Batman and Robin.  (…The old man never even bothered to come to his own high school ceremony – not that Tim was expecting him to – although Dick and Barbara both did attend at least, albeit sitting at opposite ends of the auditorium.)

“It was building for a long time.  I realize that now.  …It was never really right.  I mean, this isn’t exactly a normal childhood.”

He hadn’t really comprehended the notion then, but Tim understood now what those words meant – unfortunately all too well.

Tim sensed a shadow behind him, and for a brief instant, he half-envisioned it being Bruce from the way it loomed – but of course when he revolved around it was only Dick instead.

“Yo, you all right? You look like you’ve just seen a ghost.”

“Yeah, I’m fine.”  Tim looked down at the scrapbook in his lap, a wistful mist in his eyes.  “I was just… thinking I don’t really have any pictures of my folks.  At least none where we’re all together.”  Or that isn’t a mugshot, he thought sullenly to himself.  “I never saw my dad keep any mementos of Mom after she died.  To be honest, I’m not sure I even still remember what she looks like.”

Dick plopped down on the ground next to him, resting a hand on the boy’s sagged shoulder.

“Listen, I hope you know: No matter what, you can always think of the two of us as family at least. I know I haven’t exactly been that much of a great guardian myself, that I could never replace what you lost either… But you are still a brother to me. Hell, I consider you the closest thing to a real relative I’ve had since then.”

Tim simply nodded, swallowing a lump in his gorge.  Dick patted his back with a thump.

“Us guys, we gotta stick together, right?  Through thick and thin.”

“Yeah.”  Tim ducked his neck towards his collar, surreptitiously drying ducts on his sweatshirt.  “…Thanks, you know, for letting me stay here so long.  Roy and Conner too.”

“Hey, what are friends for?” A pause.  “…How’s Conner doing by the way?”

Tim snorted, the caution in the other’s tone not escaping his notice.  “What do you care?  You never liked him anyway.”

“That’s not true. It’s just… The whole idea of cloning someone kinda wigs me out, okay?  I dunno, imagining there being a duplicate copy of you running around is freaky enough, but one of Superman?  It still doesn’t sit well with me to leave him loose like that, after all the underhanded crap Cadmus has pulled.  Something about it just doesn’t seem right.  Who’s to say he doesn’t have some secret kill switch that’ll make him go rogue like Supergirl’s doppelganger?  Gotham may be full of crazies and creeps, but at least we never really had to deal with stuff of metahuman caliber aside from Ivy and Clayface, or Kirk when he took the serum.”  Dick intentionally didn’t include Killer Croc on the atypical rogues roster; guy was too dumb a criminal to count.  “We’re on the high end of the ‘weird’ scale, sure, but not even Batman’s equipped to take down a serious superpowered menace alone.”

Tim glared at him in disbelief.

“Is that you talking, or the old man?”

“…Maybe a bit of both,” Dick willingly conceded.  “Look, I’m just worried, that’s all.”

“Yeah well, don’t be. I’ve got Mr. Kent on speed-dial, and Kon gave me his full consent to use the Kryptonite at my discretion as part of our ‘roommate agreement’.  If anything happens, he told me himself he wants me to hit him with it as hard as I can.” …Even if it meant killing him – although Tim knew he could never go through with that. Not again. “Besides, it’s not him you’re actually worried about, is it?”

“Tim…”

“No, you know what this is?” Tim clenched his fist, drawing away from contact again.  “You look at him with the same way you do me – like some ticking time bomb about to explode. I’m getting real sick and tired of it.”

“It’s not like that.”

“Sure it isn’t.  Look, for your information, Conner’s doing fine. Hell, he pretty much behaves just like you; he’s probably getting wasted and chasing after chicks at some mixer right now.  …That’s what you call a ‘normal college life’, isn’t it?”

Dick cleared his throat, aversely acknowledging hypocrisy.

“…What about you?  How is school going?  Do you like it there?”

Tim shrugged.

“It’s okay.”

“You know you didn’t have to just stick locally around here.  If you wanted to go someplace else I would’ve sponsored you.  I mean, I chose to stay close to Gotham because of that… ‘part-time job’ stuff, but you’re smart, you could’ve gone anywhere better.”

“I told you, I’m fine with this.”

“What about taking that girl’s suggestion at least?  Life doesn’t just have to be about books and studying for tests all the time either, you know.  Look at it this way: You’ve got the time and opportunity now to be a part of after-class club activities that I never had.  Why not take advantage of it, get out there and socialize.  Enjoy the excitement of your youth and all that.”

Tim stared, trying unsuccessfully to read the other’s expression.  He couldn’t deduce whether the dude was just being humorously sarcastic, or genuinely envious and attempting to live vicariously through him.  Either way, he wasn’t falling for it.

“I said forget it.”                                                          

Dick kept pressing despite disengagement, earnest in his endeavor to tempt Tim to pursue what used to fill the boy with fervent passion, desperately hoping to rekindle some kind of joyful spark.

“Come on, I’m sure it’ll be fun.  I bet I could even still teach you to do a quadruple somersault if you’re interested.”

“Why?  I suck at it.”

“You just need more practice.  …Besides, it’d be kind of a shame to let a legacy die out without passing it on to at least one person.”

Tim wavered at the sincere, if somewhat scheming statement.

“I don’t know…”

“Trust me, it’s easy once you get the hang of it.”

“Maybe for you.”  He bitterly bit his tongue under his breath.  “I’d like to see you try to concentrate on keeping your balance with the Joker as a peanut gallery.”

“What was that?”

“…Nothing.”

Dick held his gaze for a second.

“Tim, I didn’t want to bring this up, but… Conner called me the other day.  He told me, about the lab incident.  He says you haven’t been sleeping or eating much either.”

Tim grit his jaw, feeling like a dagger had just been thrust in his gut.  He couldn’t believe his best (perhaps only) bud in the world would betray him like that.

“Damnit, Kon.”

“Don’t blame him, he’s just worried about you too.  I told you: You don’t need to keep hiding things from us.  We’re here to help if you need anything.  Babs too.  If something’s troubling you, you can talk to us.”

“It’s fine, I’m handling it.”

Dick wouldn’t desist, determined to get the truth out of him.

“Tim, I heard you yelling earlier.  …He’s back again, isn’t he?”

The boy sighed in surrender, eyes slanting stage right.  “…To your left, making faces.”

His partner fixed him with stern concern.

“Are you off your meds again?”

“They don’t work.  Not as well as they used to.”

“That doesn’t mean you should just stop taking them.”

“For what?  So I can only experience the side effects?”

“So talk to Leslie.  Ask her to adjust the dosage.”

Tim made a hollow noise.  “I’m already on the highest strength that’s considered ‘safe’ for human consumption.”

Dick pulled out his phone anyway and began dialing her number.

“I’m contacting her.  There must be at least something else we can try.”

“Not Dr. Thompkins,” Tim whined, as if a toddler throwing a tantrum.

“Look, either you call to make an appointment, or I will.”

Tim seethed, grinding his teeth.  “All right, fine.  Jeeze. God, you and Barbara still both treat me like a fucking child.”

“Yeah well, maybe if you stop acting like one.”

“Whatever.  Just hand me the phone.  I’ll talk to her.”

Dick extended the cell towards Tim, who took it with all the enthusiasm of accepting a dirty sock.

“It’s ringing.”

He listened closely in on the conversation to confirm a meeting time was set up, before Tim returned the receiver.

“Here.  She wants to talk to you.”

Dick lifted the mobile to his ear.

“Hey, doc.”

“Hello, Richard.  It’s good to hear from you boys.  How’s the back treating you?”

“Fine.”  He didn’t want to dwell too much on his own health status, so he moved on to the matter at hand.  “Is there anything we can do to help Tim?”

“In such a rare and unusual case as this, it’s hard to say.  It’d be beneficial to start by identifying the root of his relapse.  Once we pinpoint that, it’ll be easier to formulate a treatment plan.   It’s possible it could just be due to the stress of moving to a new environment.  It’s good that you’ve been able to help support him through high school, but now that he’s becoming independent it may be triggering a stronger separation anxiety response in him.  Even if consciously he rejects it, the Joker ingrained himself as a parental figure in Tim’s mind.  Essentially, he equates that kind of attention with the nurturing love and protection he never properly received growing up.  It’s common for child victims of abuse to form a disorganized attachment to the caregiver, especially when the caregiver behaves in an inconsistent manner.  The conflict of the caregiver being both a source of comfort and distress can cause the child to display contradictory patterns when faced with a stressful situation; instinct tells him to simultaneously avoid and approach the one who is mistreating him.   In the absence of a familiar atmosphere he’s accustomed to, he’s likely seeking alternate methods of coping as a survival mechanism.  Has he been under any kind of particular pressure lately?”

Dick relayed the events leading up to the fainting spell, with little input from Tim beyond affirmative nods.

“I see.  It’s certainly a sign of progress that he’s trying to face his fears, but a heads-on approach might not be the best tactic.”

“I tried to tell him that.  He won’t listen.”

“I’ll have a chat with him about it when I see him, hopefully we can find a way for him to succeed in his studies without compromising his sense of safety.  One more question, this is important: Has he tried to harm himself?”

“I… don’t think so.  I’ll check, and let you know.”

“Please do.”

As Dick temporarily terminated the exchange, he rotated to see Tim had stood up and was headed towards the door.

“Where do you think you’re going?”

“Out for a smoke – walk – whatever.  Just text me when you need me.”

“Hold it.”  The harsh bark arrested the boy before he was halfway to the exit.  “Wrists.”

Tim swiveled with a sour countenance.

“Seriously?  Do we really have to do this?”

“Show me.”

He hissed, but obediently rolled up his sleeves, revealing bare but apparently unmarked skin.

“Satisfied?”

Dick advanced and examined him all over anyway, before nodding.

“All right.  Now empty your pockets.”

Tim tsked, feeling as violated as when the staff at the detention center frisked him on admittance for any concealed contraband.  He dug through his possessions, retrieving objects one by one: phone, wallet, CD player, lighter, cigarettes, and finally – under Dick’s demanding eye – the hidden pocketblade.

“Give me the knife.”

He hesitated.

“Don’t make me wrestle it from you.”

Relinquishing, he slapped the weapon into Dick’s grip without a word.

“Thank you.  You can go, but try to keep near.”

“Sure thing, Mom.”

Dick deliberately chose to ignore the sardonic retort, used to receiving attitude by now.  (For a fleeting moment, he mused if he ever gave Bruce this much frustration, although no doubt Alfred would certainly attest to it.)

After Tim left, Dick hit redial to reassuringly inform Leslie on the observed lack of self-inflicted damage to the patient’s physical condition at least – and preemptive confiscation of means just to be safe – before bidding goodbye with a final beep.  He sighed as he rubbed his neck, hoping his “tough love” hadn’t come off as too deterring. He really wasn’t good with this whole “parenting” thing, considering the primary role model he had for nearly half of his life after early adolescence.

As he picked up the memoir from the floor, he caressed his fingers feather-light over the cover, brushing off collected dust and disenchantment before delicately placing it on a shelf for easy viewing access.  The rest he unceremoniously dumped in the “to toss” pile, purposefully cramming as much trash as he could on top.  …After a few minutes though he fished them out again, rescuing from the base of the rubbish heap with ambivalent reluctance, restoring to the original package and sealing tightly with tape.  They could remain upstairs for now at least – like his ruined Nightwing costume – evidence of old wounds and shattered bonds shuttered behind closed panel; tucked away in the dark recesses of his conscience, lurking and lingering deep in the shadows off-screen.

Out of sight, out of mind.

Two birds of a feather Say that they're always gonna stay together But one's never going to let go of that wire He says that he will But he's just a liar

[zmediaoutlet]

You've mentioned it in a few tags, but if you have the chance/inclination, I would love to hear more of your thoughts about the final scene of 13x03 -- as someone who was, er, less than pleased with the ep, I'm trying to get a more positive angle on it, and I love your insights (and agree with them more often than not) so...help? ^^;

I don’t know what insights I have, but I can talk about my thoughts. This ended up being super long, so the thoughts are under the cut:

First of all, I think all analysis should start with a very close reading of the text. Let’s look at the dialogue in the episode in two key scenes.

First, a snippet from the third scene. We start off fine—Samtired, Dean neutral. (He’s clearly also tired, but he comes in more surprisedabout the Missouri thing than angry, depressed, etc.) Then, Sam says that he’ssending Jody to take care of Missouri’s case, so that they can stay to workwith Jack.

SAM: We need to help Jack learn how to control his powers.Jody can handle this.DEAN: Yeah, maybe she can. Or, maybe she ends up dead because you wanted to skipout on her to babysit the Antichrist.

As soon as Jack is mentioned, Dean immediately moves to anger. It’s quiet, but obviously accusatory,and obviously that’s aimed at Sam. He’s upset that Sam is putting Jack abovetheir friends. Sam responds with confusion, for a second—he’s staring at Dean,wrinkled forehead (so much forehead), wide eyes and parted mouth of shock. Theystare at each other, with Dean clearly fishing for a response. Then,

SAM: Dean, we need him.DEAN: No, don’t.SAM: Mom—DEAN: Don’t. You— If you want to stay here and Mr. Miyagi this kid, knockyourself out. I didn’t sign up for that, so I’m gonna go to work.

So, Dean leaves. Sam sighs, and groans, but he’s not angry.Dean wasn’t even particularly angry in that last line, but he reacted sharplyto we need him, and doesn’t even wantto hear Sam’s theory. Note how quickly he interrupts on Mom.

Okay, now we can skip over a lot of the boring Patiencebusiness (though, it is interesting that Dean tells a smiling Jody [?? What wasthat, as a directing choice?] that he’s fine, and then is CLEARLY NOT FINE ATALL). We come back to the bunker with Dean having seen yet another of theirfriends (or good acquaintances, at least) die, in a world which he is nowtelling people is crapsack and shitty. Now:

We enter the penultimate scene on Sam’s clearly upset face. He looks like a wife who’s been sitting in thedim kitchen waiting for her deadbeat husband to get home from the bar so shecan scold him. He won’t even turn around to face Dean when he greets him—thoughhe does greet him, asking about the case and acknowledging Missouri’s death.Dean is grim, and even more obviously exhausted than he was at the beginning.He immediately starts with a mean-spirited joke, and we watch Sam’s face whilehe says it:

DEAN: How’s the kid? He go dark side yet?

Sam squeezes his eyes closed in suppressed anger.

SAM: Nope.

He finally turns around, ready to confront Dean. He’sfidgeting with one of the target-markers on the war table, which is relativelyunusual body language for Sam. He also has an interesting slouch, and openposture. He’s not shamefaced, or apologetic—he’s ready to fight.

SAM: He is pretty messed up, though.

Dean responds neutrally. This isn’t a fight, he doesn’tthink, just a statement of fact.

DEAN: You’re telling me.

Sam looks down, and then responds in a tone which is—less antagonisticthan his posture had been, and after he speaks he meets Dean’s eyes directly.His expression isn’t angry, but rather… disappointed.

SAM: No, Dean, he’s messed up because of you.

When Dean looks back, and looks genuinely confused by this,Sam smiles (humorlessly) and his mood shifts closer to anger again. How couldDean not get it, he seems to be thinking, and he slaps the target-marker downon the war table in another slightly aggressive posture.

SAM: Dean… You said you’d kill him.

Dean looks away, understanding where Sam’s upset is comingfrom (perhaps) now. It’s not quite an eye-roll, but that wasn’t quite how thatmoment between him and Jack went. We can guess now that Dean didn’t tell Samthat Jack was stabbing himself and trying to die, because Sam would have askedhow that conversation went. (Of course, it’s possible that Dean did barereporting, but the tone of this next line implies that the conversation betweenDean and Sam about this moment didn’t happen.)

DEAN: It wasn’t exactly like that.

There’s a slight emphasis Dean puts on that, and he’s not angry yet either. He looks back to Sam, andmaybe he was going to explain more, but Sam jumps in with:

SAM: Then how exactly was it?

A line which, while ostensibly calm in tone, is said a) as abit of an interruption, and b) Sam’s sighing through it and giving Dean a look, putting himself on Jack’s siderather than Dean’s. Dean is having a rough… week, let’s put it that way, and hedoesn’t respond well to this. We see immediately that Dean is thinking aboutthat moment from earlier, and he hasn’t had the benefit (unlike the audience)of seeing the patient, slow way Sam is working with Jack, and learning abouthis feelings and personality.

DEAN: I told him the truth. See, you think you can use thisfreak, but I know how this ends, and it ends bad.

The camera here cuts to Jack, listening in, and we’reclearly immediately meant to feel bad for the poor sweetheart. (By the way,thank god they’ve complicated him with a touch of brattiness—if it were allsyrup all the time he’d be unbearable.) That being said—Dean has a long, long history of being right about this stuff, and as theaudience we know that, too. But then—we cut to a different locus of the argument.Sam moves from talking specifically about usinga supernatural power to bring a loved one back to life (something we’veseen them do multiple times and which they tend to agree is a bad idea… exceptwhere their brother is concerned), and changes the conversation to be about this:

SAM: I didn’t.DEAN: What?SAM: I didn’t end bad. When I was the “freak.” When I was drinking demon blood.

Sam says it aggressively, strongly, sharply. Puts obviouspauses between the phrases. Dean immediately discards this, and he’s doing ittruly—it’s not him making a point, he really honestly does not believe thatthese situations are remotely similar.

DEAN: Come on, man, that’s totally different.

Sam is keeping the argument here, though; he’s drawing avery close parallel between himself and Jack.

SAM: Was it? Because you could’ve put a bullet in me. Dad told you to put a bullet in me, but youdidn’t. You saved me. So help me savehim.

We see Dean rejecting this line of argument even as Sam’shalfway through it, though. He doesn’t like this parallel at all and disagreeswith it. Superficially, of course it’s true, but Dean doesn’t buy it, andclearly doesn’t like the implications.

DEAN: You deservedto be saved. He doesn’t.

We cut here to Jack again, looking sad, while Sam insists—

SAM: Yes, he does, Dean, of course he does.

But then we cut back to Dean, and the camerawork here isinteresting. Finally, Dean is making this into a real argument, moving close. Sam is gigantic in the foregroundhere, and Dean is small and looking up and bleeding hurt, and he’s absolutelyrejecting Sam’s parallel-drawing. He remembers where the argument started, andhe’s still having none of it:

DEAN: Look, I know you think that you can use him as somesort of an interdimensional can opener, and that’s fine.

Note: it’s clearly not fine. Sam doesn’t like theaccusation, either, though he did start the day with ‘use’ rather than ‘hugsand kisses’. Anyway—

DEAN: But don’t act like you care about him, because you onlycare about what he can do for you. So, if you want to pretend, that’s fine, butme? I can hardly look at the kid, ‘cause when I do, all I see is everybody we’velost.

Now Dean is raising his voice, reacting from strong hurt.This is still the core of the problem. It’s not hating Jack-as-a-person, it’shating Jack as a function. A subtledifference, but key, I think. Sam responds to the accusation of Jack as responsiblefor the various losses—

SAM: Mom chose totake that shot at Lucifer. That is not on Jack.

Dean doesn’t disagree, but moves directly to the issue ofactual (possible) culpability, as far as he understands it.

DEAN: And what about Cas? SAM: What about Cas?DEAN: He manipulated him. He made him promises. Said, “paradise on earth,” andCas bought it. And you know what that got him? It got him dead!

Dean’s voice is raised again and there’s a shiver of emotionrunning through it; when we cut to Sam’s coverage (and again, the camera is lowbehind Dean’s shoulder and Sam is massivelooming over him), Sam is grimacing and looking down, not exactly pushing backagainst Dean’s feelings or his point.

DEAN: Now, you might be able to forget about that, but I can’t!

And then we cut, quickly,between Dean’s wide-open pain, and Sam’s more shuttered expression. Then there’squiet, and we cut to Jack, who seems to be having real feelings about Castielper Kelly’s cheerful inculcation, earlier, and we cut there to the final scene.

…So. A lot is going on, there.You know that, for me, the Sam & Dean relationship is the actual main plotof the show. A lot of crap happens that they have to react against, but italways comes down to these two, for me. As we’ve also discussed, the latterseasons have this general shape: seasons six, seven, and eight are aboutfiguring out where they stand with each other, post-Apocalypse, whichculminates in the ‘marriage’ scene in Sacrifice (even platonically, that was areal promise of devotion); seasons nine and ten are about working through theconsequences of betrayal, and working out how devoted they truly are to this ‘marriage’;seasons eleven and twelve were about the close, mature, real work of making the‘marriage’ function. In seasons eleven and twelve they were honest with eachother, worked through their problems by talking; when there was a secret, theyapologized quickly and forgave quicker, and they had each other’s backs throughthick and thin. It’s remarkable, the level of maturity they’ve reached.

Season thirteen has opened on avery dark time for the Winchester boys, and they’re starting from verydifferent places in dealing with it. Dean is heartbroken; Sam has hope. Sam’shope is pinned to Jack’s power. He wasn’t positive that Castiel was ultimatelydead, as we saw with him questioning Dean twice about that in 13.01; he hasalso mentioned repeatedly that he doesn’t think their mother is dead, thatLucifer might have kept her alive for some reason. (Which he’s right about—really,if anyone knows what Lucifer might do, it’s Sam Winchester.) Dean, in contrast,refuses to believe that Mary is alive and he’s certain that there’s no comingback for Cas. He has clung to that defeat almost as a comfort, a way to keepwalking—getting his hopes up, just to have them dashed, would be even morepainful. He gave up, and we saw it, the second God didn’t answer his prayer.

Sam and Dean disagree a lot, butit’s rare that we get to see a profound disagreement like this which isn’tlocated in a personal place. We sawreal anger between them in season four and season nine. We saw personalbetrayal, dismissal—we’ve even seen them try not to be family, though of coursethat never lasts long. (Might be impossible, considering the soulmate aspect.)This disagreement about Jack is bad, and that was a real fight they had, thereat the end. But the disagreement is still located on Jack, and I think that’s a very important distinction. Sam ismad at Dean for causing Jack pain, but he clearly understands why it’shappening and where it’s coming from. Dean is mad at Sam for trying to keep(what he thinks is) false hope alive and trying to use the supernatural forces,when that always ends bad. But thisisn’t fury. This isn’t personal betrayal. Dean lashed out in a cruel way withthe ‘oh, I guess you just forgot about Cas’ line, but that’s… frankly, veryDean. He lashes out when he’s upset. Sam knows that, and he doesn’t lash back,he’s just… frustrated. A punch isn’t going to be thrown, here.

Put it a different way. In aphysicalized incest world, where they might share a bedroom in the bunker? Noone would be getting any tonight, and there probably wouldn’t even be cuddles.(The horror.) But after this argument, I can still see them going to bedtogether. Sam’s shoulders might be held high and tight, and Dean might have tohave a few beers after his shower before he slips quietly into bed, but they’restill on the same team. They still love each other, and there’s no doubt aboutthat. They’re just mad. They’ll get better. This argument doesn’t make me doubtthat’s true, for a second, and the Winchesters don’t doubt it either—not in theAU where their love is more obvious, and not canonically.

There is an argument to be madethat Dean is coming off poorly, here, specifically because they keep focusingon the woobified aspects of Jack. “Jack is such a sweetie, and Dean is just abig meanie-head.” I can see why people are thinking that. However, I don’tthink it’s true. This episode particularly, with Jack acting a tiny bit bratty,we’re starting to get a more complex view of him. A lot of the work with Jackin the episode focused on choice. Kelly’s little video insists that Jack can bewhatever he chooses to be; that’s contrasted against Sam’s insistence to Jackthat he can be both powerful and good, and Dean’s insistence that the situationwill go wrong and that Jack was always going to be evil. That duality was a strongtheme throughout. Jack threw a tiny bratty tantrum; Jack was surpassingly sweetwhen Sam offered him a helping hand. He doesn’t know what side he’ll fall on,and neither do we, and neither do the Winchesters. They have their opinions,and the fans are developing their own, but it is being left ambiguous which wayit will go—and I love that. The turn comes when Jack thinks about Cas, who maytheoretically be a neutral party—and then the episode’s focus immediately flipsto Cas waking up in the Empty, upon Jack literallyonly vocalizing his name. What kind of fucking power is that, holy cow.

Anyway. Dean’s anger and hurtare real, and we’re shown repeatedly how deeply it’s felt. Is it pretty? No. Isit heroic? No. But it feels real, and it’s why this show is worth watching. Meanwhile,Sam is truly, really trying to help Jack… and he’s also not pretending like hedoesn’t want to use him, which is so deeply in character for Sam that it makesme want to do a little dance. These complexities are why I still come back, andI’m so glad we’re getting them. It’s looking right now like 13.04 will continuethis argument, and this complexity, and I can’t wait. I love that I can loveDean Winchester, and see every tiny bit of where he’s coming from, and stillthink he’s wrong, and still be interested in how the story is unfolding. In alot of ways, this is reminding me of mid-season nine—when we knew that Dean haddone wrong, and we knew exactly whyhe had. I was completely neutral, there, and I’m neutral now. I just want tosee how the story unfolds.