#the boyz juyeon fanfic

[daisyvisions]

Change Your Mind - (l.jy)

➺ Pairing: fboy best friend!Juyeon x afab!reader

➺ Summary: You befriend your college’s resident fuckboy who’s been eager to get with you since day one. But after a rollercoaster of emotions between your friendship, he wants you more than you could ever imagine.

➺ Word Count: 4k (wow who is she?!)

➺ Warnings: Smut (18+, minors DNI), friends to lovers, mentions of partying, drinking alcohol, fuckboy tendencies (flirting, hookups, ghosting), lying to reader (at first), lots of kissing and making out, dry humping, oral (f! receiving), slight handjob and masturbation, unprotected sex (but he pulls out), aftercare, pet names (sweetheart, baby), a lovesick Juyeon

➺ A/N: I’m officially back from my break! Really wanted to take some time off and focus on things irl, can’t really say if the break helped bcos I was still stressed haha but anyway!This took me a while to finish up, felt incredibly rusty writing again but glad I was still able to do it 😭 Considering this as my late birthday greeting for Juyeon. Hope you enjoy this piece! Proofread once. Let me know if I missed anything!

➺ Network & Tag: @deoboyznet, and my girlies @aimeecarreros @snowflakewhispers @winterchimez

If anyone told you that you’d end up becoming best friends with one of the most sought out guys in your campus (and not to mention resident fuck boy), you would’ve laughed at their face. All your life you’ve tried to avoid befriending guys like Juyeon. A guy like him just generally gave you the ick.

You never understood how or why people would want to be friends with someone whose only objective is to get into girl’s pants and be praised for it. Not only that, but also playing with someone’s feelings and just dropping them at an instant was wrong on so many levels.

But here you are, lending him a helping hand while you two clean out his living room after throwing yet another one of his bi-weekly parties, which was usually code for “Please let me at least make out with someone tonight.”

It’s crazy how you consider him one of your bestest friends. In another world you both knew this friendship would never work out. You were both opposite of each other in so many ways!

So how did you even end up becoming friends with Juyeon?

Transferring to a different university in the middle of the semester was one of the worst things that could've happened to you. Not only did you have to adjust to a new set of lesson plans and navigate your way around campus, but you also had to sit alone during lunch since practically everyone already knew each other from freshman year and had their own set of cliques.

During your first week, you thought you could at least find a table you could sit with just by going up to the group you vibed with the most and ask politely. But you decided to just sit by yourself instead and avoid any embarrassing introductions. You refused to be known as the weird new girl (which you already felt like one to begin with.)

You tried to fight off the tears emerging from the corners of your eyes as you sat quietly in the corner of the cafeteria, slowly poking the food on your tray as you try to drown out the noise around you.

You wish you didn’t have to transfer and leave everything and everyone you knew behind. Yes, you can still call or text your friends, but you knew it was different than actually being with them on campus.

You were convinced you’d be alone for the rest of your years in college. No friends to hang out, laugh, or cry with. No one to go through the same struggles as you. No one to tell you that everything was going to be okay. You were definitely on your own until-

“Hey.” The voice suddenly snapping you out of your self-loathing as you look up and see probably one of the most handsome men you have ever seen in your life.

The way his eyes held so much love, how his smile could light up anyone’s day, and how his aura was something you never felt with anyone before. He was practically radiating sunshine to your already gloomy day. It almost felt too good to be true… Because what the hell was he doing here in front of you?

“…Hi?” You sit up straight as you try to subtly dab off the tears in your eyes.

“I couldn't help but notice you sitting here all alone.” The man gently says.

Great, the first thing he notices about you is how much of a loser you are. But before you could even say anything back he continues on.

“Would you like to come sit with us? We have some space for you at our table.” He slowly smiles at you. You hesitated at first, confused by the whole situation but quickly made up your mind.

“Uh… yeah, sure! If it’s not any trouble.” You shyly respond.

“Of course not! Can’t let a pretty thing like you be all alone on her first week here right?” He holds out his hand to you.

“How did you-”

“I’m Juyeon.” He interrupts you again. You tell him your name, your cheeks slowly warming up as your hand intertwines with his as he looks deeply into your eyes.

“Beautiful name for a beautiful girl.” He smirks. You felt the butterflies raging within your stomach.

“So, let’s go?” He waits for your response, but you shyly nod your head instead as proper words get caught up in your throat. Grabbing his hand as you stand up and follow his lead.

You try not to make a fool out of yourself as you feel Juyeon’s hand rest on your lower back as you guides you through the sea of people. As you two are walking towards his table he leans close to your ear and whispers,

“We’re gonna be best friends, I promise.”

And ever since that day Juyeon really did keep his promise. He helped you catch up with some of the lesson plans you had, guided you around school, and always made sure to leave a space for you beside him during lunch.

You tried to wrap your brain around the idea of how someone like Juyeon just randomly entered your life and swept you off your feet. At first you felt like you were on cloud nine getting the most attention and almost boyfriend-like treatment from him. But as the weeks went by you soon discover that his reputation actually preceded him more than you thought.

You see, it was no secret that Juyeon was somewhat of a playboy. Well, somewhat was an understatement. During the first few weeks since you became friends he would walk you to class almost every time. In those moments you couldn’t understand why people would give you such weird looks or whisper to each other whenever you two would pass by.

Maybe it was because you stuck out like a sore thumb as the new girl? You decided not to mind it for a while, pushing down the thought that you were just overthinking all of this… that is until you accidentally learned about his reputation and the real reason why he approached you that day.

It was an accident. You were never meant to find out anything about Juyeon. But during a party that he brought you to, a certain loosed-lip drunk friend (Eric) decided to spill everything to you, down to every letter and detail imaginable.

To be honest, it didn’t bother you when you found out that Juyeon was indeed a fuck boy. You saw the signs as the weeks passed by.

The way he would flirt with someone while waiting for you to finish class, how the notifications on his phone would show a name of a different girl every week, and even the subtle touches he would leave on you which were definitely not considered friendly but not perverted either. What bothered you the most was finding out the reason why he even wanted to be friends with you.

“He’s been really working up to have his way with you, you know? And I mean who could blame him? Have you seen yourself? You’re so fucking hot-” Eric rambles on to you as he tries to lean his body against the wall to keep himself upright, slowly inching his way closer to you. You felt your blood boil in that moment, completely ignoring Eric’s advances.

How could Juyeon do this to you? Even after everything you shared with him about your life, your struggles, your secrets too? And to think you were starting to feel like he could be a really great friend to you. But this? Hell no. You were not about to let some handsome sleazy guy use you like that. Not in this or any lifetime.

You nearly crush the plastic red cup in your hand before storming out of the house, intentionally pushing past Juyeon’s shoulder in the way as he tries to approach you with the most concerned look you had ever seen on his face.

He ran after you that night. He even dropped on his knees begging for forgiveness in front of a crowd of drunk college people too. Over the top sure, but somehow you knew his apology wasn’t just a one and done thing.

And after the humiliating lecture you gave him as well as the list of promises he had said he will be doing in order to make up for his mistakes, you decided to give him another chance.

In return of accepting his apology, you offered to help him get out of his fuck boy tendencies and be his “guardian angel”. Juyeon was reluctant of the idea at first because it would mean he couldn’t be free to do as he pleased but he eventually gave in. He had to because well… He did owe you a lot for lying to you in the first place.

Somewhere in your mind you knew this could turn out to be a bad idea. Fool me once, shame on you; fool me twice, shame on me, or however the saying goes. But Juyeon was different.

You knew somewhere in that deep conceited mind of his there was a version of him that was actually a good guy. A guy that can actually learn how to not fool around and maybe one day, find someone worth changing for.

You can tell it was a struggle for him at the beginning. But eventually he started to lessen the flirting, the hookups, the ghosting, and more.

Gone were the days where Juyeon had a line of women wrapped around his fingers (because they were too many of them to count). Dating was still a thing for him, but he had said and even showed you that he would take them seriously and not just move onto the next one as easily as he did before.

Eventually you realized over time that Juyeon turning over a new leaf was also becoming a struggle for you especially at parties when he would come up to you nearly drunk out of his mind, his subconscious would revert back to his old habits and he would act them all out on you.

His hands subtly snaking around your hips, your waist, how he would brush the hair off your neck and leave a warm kiss on shoulder. The way he would smile at you like a lovesick fool, never leaving your side as he attempts to drop his corny pickup lines.

Or the way he would jokingly confess how badly he wanted to kiss you. You knew he wasn’t in the right state of mind, that he was just being his old self. But it really did confuse you because sometimes it felt all too real.

Now you understood why someone could fall so easily for Juyeon. It was second nature to him.

You tried so hard not to give into his appetite especially in those moments. But it was becoming difficult each time since you the crush you had on him from the first day you met was screaming to be set free, desperate to overtake your heart and soul and just allow him to do as he pleased, no matter the consequences.

The many “what-if’s” that crossed your mind when you were alone in your room at night had plagued you constantly. Your walls were starting to crack and it was making you lose your self control around him.

“Maybe one little kiss wouldn’t hu-” No. You shouldn’t. The whole point of staying friends with Juyeon was to guide him to being a better person. It wasn’t about you or how you felt at all!

But… how bad could it be to become selfish just one moment in your life?

“Wow, I’m so tired.” Juyeon plops down on the sofa as you finish up collecting all the empty bottles and cups around the room. After the last bottle was thrown inside the trash bag you washed your hands and plopped right next to him.

You instantly close your eyes and let out a huge sigh of relief, showing the same exhaustion as he felt. As you stay silent and enjoy this quiet moment, Juyeon can’t help but just stare at you. He watches how your chest slowly moves up and down and tries to commit to memory the little details of your face.

You look so beautiful right now, he thinks to himself. As you always have since the first time he saw you. But he pushes down the feeling deep within his gut, having given up pursuing you a while back. But it doesn't hurt to look every once in a while right?

As soon as you open your eyes again, you catch him staring at you with a look in his eyes you can’t quite read. You chuckle at how silly he’s being and turn your body slightly to face him.

“What?” You ask.

“I-It’s nothing.” He shakes his head.

“C’mon, what is it? You can tell me.” You semi pout, and how can Juyeon say no to you?

“I was thinking-”

“Oh no he’s thinking.” You fake gasp and giggle as he playfully nudges your shoulder in return.

“It’s just- I still can’t believe how we ended up as friends despite everything, you know?” He smiles gently.

“Me too.” You respond, “To be honest, if I had known about your reputation before we met I would’ve rejected you that day.”

“Yeah?” Juyeon’s eyes grow wider as he scoots closer to you. He places his hand on your knee, making you become nervous all of a sudden. “And why is that?”

“W-well…” you feel a lump forming in your throat, the way his cologne invades your thoughts and has your head slowly spinning. Is it getting hot in here or is that just you?

“Because, guys like you just aren’t my type that’s all. And well-”

“Can I tell you a secret?” Juyeon interrupts you as he looks into your eyes. You nod in response.

“I haven't been with anyone else ever since that night you confronted me about my behavior.” He pauses for a moment. Dead silence filled the air as he waited for your response while you tried to grasp what he was trying to say.

“Huh? What about that girl you were with last week? Or the one you were texting?” You softly ask.

“I... I lied about them.” Juyeon looks away from you, afraid to look at your reaction. He looks up at the ceiling, pushing down any regret he’s feeling at the moment admitting the truth to you.

“But, why?” Your voice laced with concern.

“It felt wrong to be with those girls. To even think about kissing or touching them the way I would've back then, because…” He looks back at you, his hand on your knee now traveling up to your lap.

“…All I ever thought about in those moments was you.”

You felt your heart running a mile a minute. Eyes widening at his sudden confession.

“God you’re so beautiful it kills me inside.” he raises his hand and cups your jaw, thumb slowly stroking your cheek as his gaze turns into something more than just lust.

You subtly catch him quickly looking at your lips, your eyes nearly fluttering shut as he leans in closer. And with your lips just millimeters apart, he suddenly stops.

“But who am I kidding? I know you don’t see me that way-” Juyeon retracts his head, his face expressing a certain kind of sadness you can’t seem to properly label. You can feel your heart pounding in your ears as you watch him slowly slip away from you.

“Juyeon I-”

“It’s alright, I’m probably drunk. Just- forget what I said.” He shakes his head, but before he can attempt to get up from the couch, you grab his wrist. “No.” You sternly say.

Juyeon slowly sits back down on the couch and scoots really close to you, thighs pressing against one another. His eyes don’t leave yours, waiting for what you have to say or do.

“S-show me. Show me you mean it. Every word you just said.”

“You don’t know how long I’ve been waiting for you to tell me that.” Juyeon lunges forward and wastes no time as he leans in to kiss you. His pillowy lips feeling like heaven as he guides your lips with his, both melting into one another like it was always meant to be.

As your arms start to wrap around his neck Juyeon pulls you in closer, his body slowly falls backwards onto the couch. His hands desperately grabbing your hips to make you straddle his lap.

Juyeon whimpers into your mouth as soon as his straining bulge rubs against your core. His member throbs harder as you begin to roll your hips subconsciously.

He’s fucked way too many times to count but for some reason, grinding yourself onto his crotch makes him feel like an untouched virgin all over again.

He swears he can burst inside his boxers any second now if you keep doing this to him, especially with the soft little moans coming out of your mouth that sound so sweet.

Juyeon pulls away from your lips and starts to kiss your neck, mapping out his kisses until he finds the spot that makes you melt into a puddle. He knows he’s found that spot as your moans become louder and drag on longer.

He starts to wrap his arms around your torso and without warning, he flips you both over, making you squeal as he giggles at your reaction. His eager hands waste no time to unbutton your jeans as he continues to leave marks on your neck. You slightly push him away as you feel him slowly sneaking one hand into your pants.

“Wait-” You grab his wrist before he goes any further.

“Do you want to stop?” He waits for your answer.

“No it’s not that.” Your eyes close for a moment as you catch your breath.

“It’s- well- It’s been a while I've since done this. I- I might not be good for you.” Juyeon senses the worry in your eyes. He leans down to kiss the space between your eyebrows, his free hand caressing your cheek.

“Oh sweetheart… you’ll always be too good for me.” He smiles down at you. “You sure you still want this?” You nod your head instantly.

“Use your words baby, need to hear you say it. Tell me what you want.” His hand travels to your neck and gives it a soft squeeze. The act alone is enough to get you dizzy again.

“Want you- want you to touch me, please.” You look up at him so innocently.

Juyeon leans in to kiss you passionately once more, his tongue immediately intertwining with yours. He helps you out of your pants in the process not wanting to pull his lips away from yours until he tugs the hem of your shift and lifts it off, leaving you wearing nothing but your underwear on.

His kisses start to travel oh so slowly from your lips all the way to your inner thighs. Juyeon can feel himself pre cumming at the deep inhale of your panty covered core. The wet patch luring him in to kiss it and practically mouth your covered folds.

You let out yet another ethereal moan as your fingers weave through his hair. His hands slowly pull the garter of your underwear down, throwing the damp material behind him as he continues on with his ministrations.

Juyeon wastes no time and grabs the back of your thighs and placing them over his shoulder, making sure that his face is locked onto your throbbing core. He kisses your folds before suddenly darting his warm wet tongue between them, reveling in the taste of you before flicking your sensitive bud. He looks up to watch your reactions, which motivate him to keep on going.

“P-please…” You whine as he hums and sucks on your clit. Juyeon doesn’t even need you to tell him what you want, by the sound of your moans and the way your thighs slowly squeeze his head he knows you’re getting closer to the edge.

He nearly lets go himself when you reach your high without warning, the sudden burst of your essence onto his lips as you moan out his name was something he never thought would feel so divine.

He pulls himself up and goes back to kissing you, tasting yourself on his tongue has your core throbbing for him once again. Your hands hastily helping him unbutton his own pants along with his boxers as he pulls them down and kicks them to the side.

Your mouth waters at the sight of his impressive length, your hand instantly wrapping around his member as you stroke him slowly. “Oh s-shit.” He growls into your ear.

“Want you inside me Juyeon, want you to fuck me.” You whisper in his ear. He grabs your wrist to stop, holding his own member as he aligns it with your entrance.

“Don’t want to fuck you-” He mumbles. You pull away from him, confused by his words. His other hand grabs the back of your neck as he pulls your face closer to his.

“-Want to make love to you.” He whispers into your mouth. And before you know it he’s pushing his entire cock inside you, bottoming out instantly. You both moan into each other’s mouths at the stretch. Juyeon moves his hips slowly as he starts to fuck you deeply, making sure you feel all of him going in and out of your pussy.

Juyeon wishes this moment could last forever, but the way your walls grip onto his member like a vice brings him closer to the edge faster than he had hoped. Especially with how you’re moaning into his mouth and wrapping your arms around his neck so tight? He was a goner.

He’s never fucked anyone like this before, and now he can’t imagine doing this with anyone else except you.

With every deep thrust, you feel yourself on the verge of cumming for the second time. Each stroke hitting that sweet spot in you has you reaching for the stars.

“Fuck Juyeon, you’re gonna make me cum again.” You whine as the wet sounds you're both making has you feeling dizzy.

“C’mon sweetheart, cum on my cock. God you can keep cumming on my cock as much as you want I don’t care.” His thrusts start to pick up the pace. “I’m yours forever.”

Those three words were enough to snap the coil within, breathing heavily as your walls flutter around his length. You’re so caught up in your own head you don’t realize Juyeon uttering a string of whimpers until you feel him quickly pull out his cock and blow his load all over your stomach.

The both of you take a moment to calm down from your highs before Juyeon gets up to each for the box of tissue on the coffee table. You watch him gently clean you up before he pulls his boxers back on to find your discarded underwear and also helps you put it back on.

He hovers above you before leaning down to leave small kisses around your face and on your lips. You caress his cheek slowly as he leans into your touch.

“Did you mean it? Everything you said?” You softly ask him.

“Down to every letter.” He responds. “But… I think you broke me.”

“Broke you? How?” You playfully scrunch your eyebrows at him.

“Don’t want to see myself with anyone else now.”

“Oh really?” You raise an eyebrow. “And how should I fix it then?” He smirks and kisses you again,

“Let me take you out on a date and we’ll call it even.”

[byuntrash101]

what you deserve

soft dom!juyeon x f!reader x mean dom!hyunjae smut | mdni 4.2k your bf younghoon is just a dick... your best friends just want to show you what you deserve nsfw tags under the cut

slut shaming reader (hj calls her easy), lots of teasing, fingering (because have you seen juyeon's hands? gotta put those to use), begging, pet names (princess, doll, baby, kitten), praising, degradation (slut, whore), slight dumbification, nipple play, unprotected sex but reader is on the pill (these stunts are performed by professionnals don't try this at home), spitroasting/eiffel tower, multiple orgasms (f), oral (m), creampie, double penetration, anal

a/n: would you believe me if i said it took 1 whole ass fucking year to finish this? (yes i started writing on the 1st October 22) (smh)

the boyz masterlist | navigation

Deep down you knew it wasn’t true. You knew Younghoon couldn’t be your soulmate. Most of the time he would ditch you to go hang out with his friends and not return your calls or texts for the whole night then turn up home completely drunk and smelling of an other woman's perfume, even if he denied it every time. So saying Younghoon wasn’t the best boyfriend was to say the least an understatement. 

Deep down you knew that. You knew he didn’t really love you but just used you for entertainment purposes. 

So why? Why? Did you still believe that little voice in your head? Despite the sleepless nights, despite the countless tears shed, despite the pain. You still believed you two had a chance, you still believed you could fix him… 

But did you still love him?

“What are you doing?” the stern voice of Hyunjae erupted from beside you, sitting with you on the comfortable and cushioned couch, making you jump and hurriedly hide your screen from his scrutinizing eyes.

“Huh? Hmm… Nothing” you lied, quickly typing out the rest of your text to your boyfriend.

“She’s talking to Younghoon” Juyeon snitched, seated right at your other side, as he perfectly accomplished a dangerous maneuver with Princess Peach’s pink kart securing the first place right in front of Hyunjae.

Hyunjae groaned but you didn’t know if it was because he was certain to lose the race or if it was well… because of you. 

“Y/N!” He shouted putting the controller down before even finishing the race.

Well… you knew now.

“I can’t believe you’re still with that fucking asshole” Hyunjae whistled through gritted teeth.

You knew Hyunjae despised Younghoon, hence why you were trying to hide away the screen from the eyes of your best friend. But as you turned the device the other way Juyeon snatched it from your hands. 

“What did she send ?” Hyunjae avidly asked.

“Please don’t read it” you asked Juyeon, pleading eyes bordering on begging to preserve the ridiculous trace amount of pride you had left and not read yet another text in which you bent over backwards for your ungrateful boyfriend.

“I’m not gonna read it” Juyeon declared. You exhaled in relief while Hyunjae scoffed. “But I am going to take it away for the rest of the night”. 

“What? Please give it back” you tried to reach for it but Juyeon was way taller and had longer arms there was no way you would be able to take it back from him.

“No. Just enjoy a fun gaming night with us. Okay?” Juyeon smiled at you with that adorable eye smile that you’ve been unable to say no to since middle school.

“Fine”

You played a little more Mario Kart but it was as if the atmosphere had changed.

“Can I ask you something ?” Juyeon finally asked. 

There he goes again… You thought.

The three of you were best friends for almost as long as you could remember and you knew them like the back of your hands.

When something awkward like that happened Hyunjae and yourself would rather ignore it and you would give each other time to forgive and forget but not Juyeon. He would just bluntly speak his truth.

“Sure” you said as you paused the game and Hyunjae groaned again.

“Why him?” Juyeon asked, putting his phone down. You sighed in annoyance and the 

question.

“I don’t know, Juyeon, OK? I don't know why I love him.” You said as you rubbed your aching temple.

“You can do so much better though!” He protested while Hyunjae looked at you with stern eyes.

“You deserve someone that’s going to be thoughtful and kind” Juyeon almost whispered with his deep voice, bringing the back of his hand to your cheek. 

With this simple touch the atmosphere had changed again. Juyeon’s cat-like eyes fixed on your lips, leaning dangerously as you felt his warm reassuring touch on your cheek. It felt safe and somehow you didn’t have it in you to pull away.

“Someone like me? Maybe?” he murmured, his lips grazing yours. He paused right there. Giving you one last chance to pull away, to remain faithful to your morals but… how could you? You felt the heat radiating from his face and his soft breath fanning your cheeks. You didn’t want him to stop. 

So he leaned in to close the distance between your lips and finally kissed you. The electric charge from the thrill of kissing your best friend traveled from your lips all the way down to your core, making your guts stir in excitement.

Juyeon’s hand moved from your cheek to your nape to gently press your lips further onto his own, slightly parting them to let his tongue lap at yours. Heat pulled in your lower stomach while your eyelids fluttered close, losing yourself in this kiss. Juyeon’s large palm sliding up your thigh as he kissed you softly.

“Right, my princess? “ he whispered, breaking the kiss, leaving your lips yearning for more, you nodded, looking at him through your lashes when you heard Hyunjae scoff behind you.

The brief sound brought you back to reality. You whipped your head to your side where you are greeted by the icy cold gaze of the older one, eyeing you scornfully. 

“You’re wasting your time” he said, maintaining the unwavering eye contact. “She doesn’t care about this…” he brought his hand to your cheek caressing slightly before he shifted to entangle his slender fingers around your hair “She only likes pain” he said before suddenly giving a quick and sharp pull, ripping from your lips a surprised whimper, which made Hyunjae smirk evilly.

“I knew it” he whispered, bending over you and pressing his hot lips to your cheek. "You only yearn to be treated like the little whore that you are. You want to be my little slut. Want me to hurt you, huh?" he said before he used your hair again to make you turn your head, breaking your neck into position and crashing his lips onto yours. The difference with Juyeon was blatant, overwhelming even. Hyunjae was devouring you. It was clear he wasn’t intending to ask for anything. He was demanding, he was taking what was his. And you were ready to give it all up to him… To them.

You felt Juyeon’s rough hands wrap around your waist from behind while he planted soft kisses and bites from your nape to your ear. Licking and nibbling around it while you felt his hands make quick work of rolling up your skirt past your waist line. You gasped when his large palm brushed against the thin skin of your inner thigh which Hyunjae saw as an opportunity to kiss you even deeper as you moaned into his mouth.

“Spread your legs for me, doll” Juyeon cooed, lips still pressed to the wet patch of skin on your neck. “Good girl” he praised when you did. His large palm brushed over your clothed center and you arched your back in an unpremeditated reflex, pushing your hips forward onto the older man. You felt Hyunjae’s lips pull into a sly smirk.

“Really?” he said, breaking the kiss “Already offering yourself like this?” he chuckled. "You're so fucking easy. Anyone could get it with you"

You whimpered and squirmed in embarrassment but kept your legs wide open nonetheless, which Hyunjae didn’t fail to notice. He scoffed.

“What a little slut you are” he drew back, eyes sweeping across your whole figure to finally settle on your most private part.

When Juyeon finally pushed your panties to the side and let the living room ceiling light shine directly on your center you felt like you were going to faint from the adrenaline rapidly rushing to your brain, making your breath itch in your throat. Hyunjae caught his bottom lip between his teeth.

“Look at that we barely even touched you and you’re already this wet?” Hyunjae spat with one cocked eyebrow, peering at your slicked and glistening folds with disdain.

You opened your mouth to talk back, to defend yourself but you could only deeply sigh in bliss as Juyeon's rough hand brushed against your unclothed bundle of nerves. And it was only then that you realized how right Hyunjae was and how wet you actually were. 

Your wetness had soaked through the panties and was nearly dripping down to the floor. Juyeon had no trouble gathering and spreading it all over you. He gently and slowly circled your swollen nub, teasing it, lewd wet and squelching sounds erupting from the shameless act. Making you inexorably wetter and hungry for more. 

He kept teasing you slowly as he laid wet kisses on the side of your neck, heavily breathing into your ear while Hyunjae palmed his hard member through his tighter-than-ever pants thoroughly enjoying you being spread in full display for him.

After what felt like hours of teasing you finally gathered the courage to protest in the form of a tiny high pitched whimper.

“What's wrong, my baby?” Juyeon huffed into your ear before sucking on your lobe, the heat from his mouth raised goosebumps on your skin.

“Please” you mustered, barely above a whisper.

“Please what?” he asked as you felt his lips on your neck being pulled into a smirk.

“Please I want your fingers inside me” you murmured as if you almost didn’t want the words you were speaking to actually be heard but to no avail. Both of your best friends heard you clear as day.

“Pathetic” Hyunjae said as he seemed to be palming himself with more pressure, looking anything but displeased.

“Anything for you, my princess” Juyeon cooed and immediately sunk his middle finger inside you, a disproportionately large palm resting over your mound. He circled his finger deep inside and you felt his blunt nail graze on your g spot which made you whimper and throw your head back, resting it on his shoulder.

The dull pleasure was making your head spin so much that you didn’t even hear when Hyunjae unzipped his jeans and slipped out of his boxers.

“Yeah finger fuck her. I’ll fuck her throat” he scoffed while he approached you, hard dick in hand. “Come here” he said as he forcefully pulled you towards him. The hot tip pressed against your closed mouth and precum glazed your bottom lip.

As if the stars aligned, at the exact same time as Hyunjae pushed his cock past your lips Juyeon slipped a second finger inside you, thick and long fingers stretching you out so perfectly. You moaned as Hyunjae slipped inside you, his taste spreading on your tongue, adding even more fuzz to your already foggy thoughts.

“Fuck” he said under his breath, grabbing a fistfull of your hair, bending your neck backwards and forcing you to look up at him. The pain on your scalp took your mind off the rising pleasure Juyeon was inflicting on you and you looked up at the older male with teary eyes while he kept on pushing his dick inside your wet mouth until he had to force the last couple of centimeters down your throat. And he stayed there. Look down at you as you choked on his length.

“Such a good girl for us. You take him so well, baby” Juyeon praised you as he picked up the pace, making your eyes roll back. “So pretty all stretched out and wet for us.”

“Keep your mouth open” Hyunjae whispered before finally pulling out to let you have a quick breather before he smashed his hips back into your face, setting a rapid rhythm. The burning sensation in your throat made your heart race and as Juyeon was having his way with you, circling and flicking your clit you felt the precious build up of your release forming in the pit of your stomach.

“Fuck” Hyunjae groaned as he kept on the furious pace. “It’s like this mouth was made for me. Perfectly fitted little cocksleeve” he tugged at your hair again, making you moan on his length.

You almost lost your mind when Juyeon brought his second hand to circle your clit as the other one was still pumping in and out of you. Your muffled moans grew louder on Hyunjae’s cock, the vibrations making him shiver. 

“Baby you’re so tight” Juyeon murmured in your hot ear. “You wanna cum?” he asked, slipping a third finger inside you and you almost came on the spot as you were deliciously stretched out top and bottom by your best friends. “You can cum, kitten.”

It’s the only thing you needed as your body was waiting for this command to immediately let go of the knot. You quivered and moaned, while your jaw went lax around Hyunjae. Your center tightly gripping on Juyeon’s digits, desperate to ever let them go. Twitching and spasming in delicious bliss.

“Good girl” Juyeon cooed as he gradually slowed down allowing you to ride off your high at your own speed.

“I can’t believe you fucking came already.” Hyunjae spat at you with mean eyes as he pulled his cock from your agape mouth, you took a deep breath and sighed in bliss.

But you looked down when you felt two hands going up your thighs and you were met with Hyunjae’s glacial eyes.

“You won’t need that anymore” without a heads up he tore away your panties, ripping them to shreds with a grunt as you gasped in surprise. “I want to know how this little pussy feels like” he whispered through gritted teeth, eyeing you like candy, avid hands pulling at your hips to bring you closer to the edge on the couch. In some kind of protective reflex you wanted to close your legs but Juyeon hands that were still glistening with your wetness kept them open.

“Can you be a good girl for us and keep your legs nice and spread like this?” his deep voice asked softly. The tone was soft, slightly contrasting with the strong grasp on both your thighs.

You nodded.

“Good girl”

Hyunjae didn't wait for a second. He brought his scolding hot tip to your folds and glazed himself into your juices, thoroughly coating his length as he pumped his fist around it a couple of times before pushing the tip in. 

Immediately your eyes rolled to the back of your skull and your arch your back into the couch, biting your bottom lip trying not to moan. That attempt turned out to be a failure as Hyunjae progressed inside your wet heat. When he bottomed out you let out a small cry of pleasure. As Juyeon felt your thighs twitch lightly he withdrew his hands to bring them up to your chest and kneed your breasts. His large hands lifted your top and pulled on your bra releasing your beautiful tits which made Hyunjae grunt as he fucked himself inside your cunt. Juyeon’s big palm laid over the two lumps of sensitive flesh and worked them gently, his fingers curling around your nipples to roll them around.

“So pretty, baby” Juyeon cooed into your ear, looking over your shoulder at how your tits bounced every time Hyunjae drilled his cock into you. Juyeon can’t take it anymore, he also wants to know how you feel around him and you feel him slip from behind you. You instantly miss his warm hands over your body. But the disappointment is short-lived. Because you feel his hand softly wrap around your jaw, pulling your face to look up at him. Your gaze quickly dropped from his gentle eyes to his thick cock laying heavily in his hands as he pumped himself a couple of times approaching the wet tip to your lips. 

Instinctively your lips parted to let your tongue swipe and have a taste of his essence. Which made Juyeon hiss in pleasure, fist growing stronger around his cock, making the veins of his forearm pop. He drove his cock into your mouth, earning a low grunt from him. You lips painfully stretched to accommodate to Juyeon’s girth.

“Fuckk” he cursed under his breath. “Such a good girl taking my cock like this”. He said wrapping his long fingers around your nape, giving you an encouraging push. You didn’t need more to quicken your pace, gobbling his cock as far as you could manage without hesitation.

“What a fucking whore” Hyunjae grunted as he gave you one particularly strong thrust, the sharp pleasure making you moan on Juyeon’s length. “You love cock so much? Look at you swallowing his cock like it’s your only goal in life?” He picked up the pace smashing his hips into yours. Your attention switching from Juyeon to Hyunjae. “Is that it? Your only goal is to be filled with cocks?”

“Phhfuckk” you attempted to say, your mouth full to the brim.

“So pretty baby.” Juyeon cooed as he started to thrust into your mouth when your attention got diverted. “So pretty full of cocks”

The coil in your guts tightened again as your gaze fluttered between Jueyon’s soft smile and Hyunjae’s mean eyes. Once again close to the edge.

“Keep going. She’s going to cum” Juyeon said to his friend. Not daring to take his eyes off your wet ones. Hyunjae scoffed.

“Again?” he said, gripping your thighs tighter and drilling his cock into you harder as he felt your cunt clamp around him, dangerously fluttering. “Go ahead and cum. It’s all you’re good for.” he said, one hand leaving your thigh to slap against your cunt. The pain made you choke on Juyeon. 

“Fuck” he grunted while you mumbled intelligibly, earning another slap before Hyunjae started to draw small and quick circles on your swollen and painful little clit.

That made you cross the edge again. Your body shook against Hyunjae’s relentless hips. Your pussy clenching around him and fluttering in delicious and intoxicating pleasure. Screams of bliss muffled by Juyeon’s length, making him shiver, bucking his hips into your mouth a little harsher.

Hyunjae pulled out quickly and wanted to stuff you back but was interrupted by Juyeon.

“Come on man, it’s my turn now” Juyeon said, taking his dick out of your mouth, letting you take deep breaths as you slowly came down from your high.

“Fine” Hyunjae spat as he got out of between your legs. “I was almost done” he mumbled.

Juyeon sat beside you on the couch once again he looked at you and patted his thighs.

“Ride me baby” he said and you immediately hopped on his lap. Your tits shoved in his face he took a deep breath, letting his brain be soaked with the pheromone filled smell of sex that was imprinted into your sweaty skin.

You took his length between your fingers and pumped a couple of times before you sunk your hips into his cock.

“Ffffuck” Juyeon sighed, before licking a big stripe between your tits, collecting the glistening sweat.

Hyunjae didn’t miss one second of the show. He pumped his cock as he watched you bounce on his friend’s cock. Looking attentively at the way your pussy spread wide to take him in, spitting him out covered with your slick, all of that forming a beautiful soundtrack of moans, grunts and squelching wet sounds.

Hyunjae kept on fisting his rock hard and dripping cock as the same rhythm as you lifted your hips and let them smash back down. 

“How is it in there, dude?” he asked Juyeon.

“F-fucking great” he responded not taking your tits out his mouth.

“Yeah I know. Slutty cunts are the best. Because they just suit anyone.” He said letting his free hand slap your ass. Making you arch your back and bounce even harder. A silent plea for more. And it’s exactly what you got. “And this one she’s one real easy whore. Letting anyone fuck her raw” He spanked your ass again, even harder this times, leaving a beautiful print behind on your skin. “Isn’t it right, slut?”

“Yesssss!!!!” you panted, bouncing even harder, the familiar build up heating up in your guts again, Juyeon’s large hands gripping the underside of your thighs and aiding you bounce on him while he muffled his moans in your chest. “I’m a slut a real fucking whore for you. I love both your cocks so much”

“Is that so?” Hyunjae said, tilting his head, his lips being pulled in a sly smirk as an idea blossomed in his lust soaked mind.

He approached his tip to your ass, rubbing his hard-on on your cheeks. Before leaning over and spitting a big wad right into your pucker. Making the hole blink.

“Since you love our cock so much. You don’t mind me taking your ass, right?” he said pressing his tip still wet with your slick into your only available hole. 

“Oh G-god” you chocked when you felt your ass being spread open.

“Please” Hyunjae chuckled still pushing inside you. “Just call me Hyunjae” he said cockily as he pushed the last inch into your bottomless hole. 

“Fuckkk it feels so good” he cried out stopping your hips, your nails digging into Juyeon’s shoulders, urging him to fuck up into your cunt. He did so immediately. His dick grazing against Hyunjae’s inside your ass.

“Fuckk” the older one hissed when he felt the coming and going of his friend through the small membrane that separated both your holes.

He started to fuck into your asshole as soon as you looked accustomed to him. He loved to watch the way your asshole dragged into his cock every time he pulled out just to welcome him back into your warmth once he pushed back in.

“Fuck baby you’re so good to us” Juyeon as lightly tugging at your erect nipple with his teeth. “So pretty for us. So fucking good.” He panted fucking his hips uo into you, making your pussy cream around him, wet sounds bouncing of the walls.

He was so close. So fucking close he could taste it.

“Fuck kitten. I’m going to cum soon” he said, grip growing stronger on your thighs.

“Yeah please. Please!! Please fill me up!” you urged when you felt another slap into your ass.

“What a filthy fucking slut begging for cum like that” Hyunjae groaned. “Want mine too whore?”

“Yees fuck please. yesyesyesyesyes!!!” you chanted, feeling both of your holes grip around the cock that were both plowing into you, rearranging your guts so deliciously. 

“Then fucking take it” Hyunjae says slipping his hand into your hair and pulling harshly. Letting his cock pump your ass full of tasty hot cum, his hips absolutely rutting into your ass, grunting and moaning. So much so that it made the cum spill out and drip on his friend's cock. But both of them couldn’t care less.

“Fuck baby. ‘m- c-” Juyeon can’t even bring himself to make full sentences and follows right after Hyunjae. You feel his enormous cock twitch inside you, delivering an ungodly amount of white hot cum right in the deepest part of you, if it wasn’t for the pill you were taking you’d be sure to be knocked up right away. His dick brush again against your soft spot and the way you feel both your holes filled with cum make you tip over the edge. And you find yourself squirting all over both their dicks in a pleasure filled scream. Your juices spray out of you in big streams, completely soaking Juyeon laid under you which makes his hips stutter a little. This orgasm is the most intense one of the night, making both your holes flutter. Your cunt clenching around Juyeon and your asshole blinking around Hyunjae while you pant and moan in complete euphoria.

The next few instants are a blur. None of you speak, only pants and sighs can be heard. All three of you, piled up on top of each other, drained and content. But the blissful silence is interrupted by the low vibrations of a phone..

A phone? your phone!

Juyeon haphazardly reaches into the pocket of his jeans laying somewhere near and holds the device to you.

You have dozens of unread texts from Younghoon and even more missed calls. Poor thing… he’s not used to you going silent on him. Not his precious and naive girlfriend.

You pushed your messy hair out of your face and picked up the call.

“Yeah?” you say voice sounding a little rough, nothing surprising given the things that were just in your mouth and roughing up your throat.

“What the fuck are you doing? Why aren't you answering my texts?” Younghoon asks, panic seeping in his rushed voice.

Hyunjae chuckled coldly behind you.

“Come cuddle, baby.” Juyeon said, pouting so much it was audible.

“WHO THE FUCK IS THAT???? Y/N??? IS THAT JUYEON???”

“Hmmmm” you hesitated before Hyunjae snatched the phone from behind you.

“You guys are done. Don’t call her again”

“WHAT THE F-”

bip bip bip

IF U WANNA HELP ME PLEASE REBLOG WITHOUT USING THE COMMUNITY LABELS 🖤

the boyz masterlist | navigation

[slytherinshua]

ON THE BLEACHERS

summary. your boyfriend is unapologetically whipped for you. here are all the things he does!!! genre. fluff. headcanons. christmassy juyeon!!! warnings. a lil violence mention. juyeon is adorable. not proofread. other than that nothing but fluff <3 pairing. jock!juyeon x nerd!fem!reader. (not specifically like nerd but... mentioned that reader wins a science fair and aces a test etc so leaning more towards jock x nerd trope.) wc. 1.8k. request. requested by 🗿 anon. a/n. i literally had SO many thoughts for this juyeon like OH MY GOD. net. @deoboyznet

jock!juyeon who was always obvious with his admiration for you even before he confessed. the entire school knew that he only had eyes for you and it was just a matter of when you would get together. the football team celebrated even more than juyeon when you became his girlfriend because they thought he would finally shut up about you. oh, how wrong they were…

jock!juyeon who simply can’t shut up about you!! sometimes he’ll just be talking to himself out loud, wondering what date he should take you on, what you would like as a gift, or what time you were free, etc. other times he’s yapping his teammates’ ears off about you because he’s so in love. he’s telling everyone about how you won the science fair that year, how you got 100 on your recent test, or how you slayed your english presentation (he knew because he missed his math class to watch you through the door). when it comes to you, he just can’t shut up, he’s so in love…

jock!juyeon who hears his teammates tease him all the time, calling him whipped or a simp. he couldn’t care less… in fact he’s proud of the fact that he’s absolutely whipped for you. because it’s you!! you deserve all the attention and affection you get from juyeon and he would never let petty comments from his teammates second guess how he acts around you. most of them are just mad that they can’t pull someone as gorgeous as you, anyway. at least, that’s what juyeon told you in a very upset ramble after-the-fact. you had to kiss away his pout.

jock!juyeon who wouldn’t hesitate to think with his fists if he ever heard them talking shit about you. he knows you would never advise physical fights, but he can barely control his anger when he hears something foul come out of someone’s mouth followed by your name. he’ll try his best to harshly shut them down with just words, but if they persist, his fists might just land on their nose. he has to sit through your scolding after the fact, but he would do it again in a heart beat. he doesn’t even care if he got suspended.

jock!juyeon who has no regard for being on time to classes or practice. his only concern is walking you to your classes, holding your hand in the hallway, giving you a sweet smile and wishing you luck before a test, and, of course, getting a kiss on the cheek before the bell rings. there’s rarely a day when he’s not 5-10 minutes late. he’s also extremely forgetful with his mind only being focused on you that he has to rely on you to have his textbooks and schedule for his next class. he was a little bashful at first when you’re handing him his textbooks and notebook and ushering him off to his class as you step into yours. but now he’s gotten used to it, and he quite likes it. especially when you leave little notes inside his notebook.

jock!juyeon who sprints through the hallways despite the no running policy after first quarter is done because second quarter is history which is a shared class he has with you. he literally gets to your classroom before you’ve even finished packing your bag. of course, he carries all your books and your bag for you regardless of if you have a shared class but especially this time since you’ll be walking in together. he always sits next to you, even the teacher can’t separate you two because he’ll find a way back to your desk sdkjskd. he always nudges your feet under the table or writes little notes on the paper if you’re not allowed to talk in class. you have to force him to pay attention with the bribe of kisses after school (which is always an effective bribe). he can’t even focus on taking notes or listening to the lesson because he’s too busy staring at you the entire time. but if you’re tired in class he will kindly offer to take notes for you both instead and he really does focus hard on writing everything down. his technique for note taking is lacking a bit but it’s still functional and informative enough for you that you don’t mind </3 it’s obvious that he tried his best for you and that is enough to warm your heart :(

jock!juyeon who is on the basketball team as well as the football team. whether it’s football or basketball, he’s the mvp and ace of both teams. although, his playing is wildly affected by you. he plays his best when he talks to you before games and knows you’re in the audience watching him. he’ll make every shot, and carry the entire team easily. but when you’re not there his game is completely off. he’ll miss shots that were easy, he’ll stumble and fall or even get injured and have to go to the nurse’s office. his brain is completely foggy when you’re not there or if there’s anything going on with you that he’s concerned about. especially when you’re sick or not at school for some reason the only thing he can think about is you. his coaches barely have to ask when they see that he’s not playing as well as normal— it’s always something to do with you. they let him take a short break to text you, and oftentimes, it gets his game right back where it should be.

jock!juyeon who swears his heart fell out of his chest when he first saw you wearing his basketball jersey. something in his brain or dna just SHIFTED right then and there he’s so obsessed. the second he saw you he kissed you so desperately like omg you looked SO pretty in his jersey he went absolutely insane. he always leaves his freshly washed jerseys in your locker and whenever you show up wearing them to watch him practice or his games he plays better than EVER. his coaches aren’t too happy about the fact that he keeps “misplacing” his jerseys and uniforms, but they order new ones for their star player regardless. they know their sports team would be in the dirt without juyeon. his talent always makes up for any recklessness he pulls.

jock!juyeon who always searches for you in the crowd before the game starts so he knows exactly where to look when he scores. he’ll blow you kisses or just smirk and wink at you when he scores an impressive point. or when he’s playing basketball he’ll point to you in the crowd and smile so everyone knows he’s always playing for you. although he’s attractive enough that several girls on the cheerleading team would kill to have a chance with him, their thoughts are immediately shut down the first game, as they watch from the sidelines as juyeon dedicates every last field goal to you.

jock!juyeon who loves to take you to the gym or field for extra practices with just him. you usually do schoolwork on the bleachers or grass while he runs laps or drills some hoops. usually it’s productive for the first half an hour or so until juyeon gets too bored of having you there but not paying attention to him. he might teach you some shots or coach you on how to handle the ball. other times he’s more interested in kissing you while you try (and fail) to focus on your science homework…

jock!juyeon who asks you out to prom and homecoming and all the school events just like any other boy with a crush would. everyone in the school knows you’ll go together and knows you’ll be accompanying him everywhere even if he didn’t ask. but juyeon loves preparing flowers and a big banner and all the extra stuff possible when asking you out, so even though you’ve been happily together for months, he’ll still ask you out as if you weren’t even dating yet. he still gets all warm in the face when you say yes.

jock!juyeon who is your biggest motivator. you barely notice how important he is to your life because he’s always there 24/7. but on the rare occasion that he stays home sick or can’t make it for any reason, you, too, struggle to focus on your classes. you’re so worried about him, it just comes so naturally. he’s not on your mind front and center as much as you are on his, but he’s always there in the back of your mind regardless. you care about him just as much as he cares about you, you’re just more covert in your way of showing it. while you prefer quieter actions like kissing his cheek, cheering from the sidelines, or writing him notes for his classes, juyeon wears his heart on his sleeve. he’s dedicating every single second of his life to you, and making sure everyone around him knows that you are his.

jock!juyeon who follows you around like a lost puppy. he really just lets you take the lead, he’s just happy as long as he’s beside you. the only thing is, he has to be holding your hand. he’s really big on that. always holding your hand in the hallways, only letting go when the second bell rings. he holds your hand during lunch too, and if he can't, his hand is around your waist or on your thigh. he’s so clingy and touchy, but you love it. the only time you won’t allow him to be clingy is when he’s sweaty from a game or practice. but this boy will take a shower so fast just so you agree to hug him again.

jock!juyeon who is hard on himself when he doesn’t play well during games. he still feels the pressure of being the mvp of the team even though he has great support from his coaches and you. if anything happens during the game, he blames himself. you always have to cheer him up and talk him through what went wrong. telling him it’s not his fault and that he did the best he could. he’ll only feel better once he hears your soft words while patting his back. and you always make sure to give him a kiss when you’re done talking too <3

jock!juyeon who shares all his highs with you. when he got accepted onto the national team for university, you’re right there with him congratulating him and being his biggest cheerleader. he’s there through your biggest highs as well, more proud of you than anyone else when you got into your dream university. he was honestly sweating it before you opened your acceptance letter because your dream university happened to be the one he got into on scholarship, and he was so scared he’d have to spend his university years apart from you. he couldn’t be happier that he’ll be right by your side throughout university as well. he hopes after those years, he’ll not only be able to call you his girlfriend, but also see a ring on your finger.

↳ the boyz taglist (bolded could not be tagged): @eternalgyu,, @blossominghunnie,, @cosmicwintr,, @weird-bookworm,, @haecien,,

@lecheugo,, @seunghancore,, @heavenfilm,, @recordsfilm,, @bananabubble,,

@talking-saxy,, @cupidslovearrows

[ericscroptop]

Double Fantasy

✧ pairing: sneaky link/situationship idol! juyeon x fem! reader

✦ genre: smut w/ hints of angst n fluff

✧ warnings: 18+ (minors DNI), smut, cowgirl position, riding, unprotected sex (WRAP IT FOLKS), creampie, dirty talk, praising, pet names, cursing, kissing, marking, spanking, fluff, secret relationship, hints of angst, “star-crossed lovers” trope kinda-ish question mark so things are kept on the low under restrictions

✦ word count: 3.6k words

✧ synopsis: you’ve tried various positions with the lee juyeon. will you ever get to be in the position of being his official girlfriend or able to be a normal couple? or is that merely a fantasy?

✦ note: inspired by the weeknd’s song “double fantasy” enjoy! xo <3

𓆩ꨄ︎𓆪𓆩ꨄ︎𓆪𓆩ꨄ︎𓆪𓆩ꨄ︎𓆪𓆩ꨄ︎𓆪𓆩ꨄ︎𓆪𓆩ꨄ︎𓆪𓆩ꨄ︎𓆪𓆩ꨄ︎𓆪𓆩ꨄ︎𓆪𓆩ꨄ︎𓆪𓆩ꨄ︎𓆪

“‘Atta girl. You do so good for me every time.” he praises as your naked form sinks down to take his cock. Your hands are holding dearly onto his shoulders while his own are stuck to either side of you.

He ensures you carefully sit over his dick, his head resting against your headboard, sighing wistfully. Taking him inch by inch and hearing those strained and broken, heavenly moans of yours is reminiscent of the last time you guys did it— and the time before that. And the time before that.

Your back arches and chest pumps towards his face, hissing while adjusting to his delectable, girthy length. Your cunt was well-acquainted with his cock, inviting him inside your hole every so often for a while now.

Even though your parts fit together perfectly, your thighs twitch and you have to take a breather. Being stuffed to the brim with his manhood takes a minute to settle into. Your walls tightly encompass his cock, getting him to throb at the awaited sensation.

In between schedules and even during hectic moments, you invaded his mind. You were his relief and breath of fresh air in the midst of his chaotic and bustling life.

Your nude body on top of his reminded him how real he is. That he gets to experience the rawness of molding together with you. Having this intoxicating moment behind closed doors, shielded from the public and cameras.

Right here and right now, only thing that mattered was fucking his special girl.

During this time, you had his attention fully and vice versa. All frustrations and tension from your personal lives and being apart was taken out in the form of erotic skin-on-skin contact.

Once his cock is gladly received and your walls ease up, you start playing with your favorite toy, rocking your hips slowly to get the friction you crave.

Your fingers rake down from his shoulders to his chest, holding onto the guy whose mere presence gets you short-winded.

“Missed me?” he mumbles, hands holding your hips and tracing the curves.

You leaned forward, tits hanging in perfect view for him while you rubbed against his pubic bone. In response to his question, you only moaned softly, overwhelmed with how stuffed you were and the way your clit sparked from the friction.

You also honestly were afraid to admit aloud that you did in fact, missed him. There was no doubt that he knew it was true, but saying it to his face was scary.

It’s silly, but this thing you’ve got going on with Juyeon was mainly physical. Even if you wanted more, you knew that request would be hard to fulfill considering his current career. It’s a miracle he even managed to make time for your hookups and keep this situationship under wraps.

He smirks at your sultry, sweet sounds. Your sounds aren’t a proper answer, but they still speak volumes to him.

“Yeah? Is that right?” he teases you for your needy mewls.

“I missed you and your sexy ass.” he uses one of his massive hands to smack against an ass cheek.

You gasp loudly and practically jolt, turned on by the sting and his confession. Your walls hug him enthusiastically, leaving him to groan and maneuver his hands to your back. He pushes you closer to him to begin kissing up your neck, letting his lips display how much your body did wonders to him.

Your neck angles automatically and his nice kisses turn more ravenous after each one. He’s keen on treasuring your body, pulling your skin slightly between his lips. He cups your skin with his mouth, nipping at it gently.

Your whimpers don’t stop, only encouraging him to keep going and drag his lips towards your chest. Those beautiful lip corners of his raise while he wraps his lips around a mound, suckling and tugging on your erect bud.

His wet, steamy mouth over your tit blows your breath away. The way he sucks and starts gladly licking your nipple inclines you to bring a hand to his hair, fisting his black strands and encouraging his behavior.

He takes a second to look up at you while he stops and moves on to your other breast. You see hunger and desperation through his orbs, communicating to you with his mouth and eyes how insanely crazy you drive him. It’s like it’s his destiny to fuck and worship your body nonstop.

Both of your parts throb against each other, turned on to the max. You whimper as he looks up at you while pulling on your nipple, your body twitching and subtly grinding over him.

Looking at him like this all for you ignites passion within. You’d allow him to do anything he wanted to you if it meant viewing that gaze, him itching with lust for you.

You’re basking in being pampered by Lee Juyeon. His blistering kisses, licks, and starved bites creates a roller coaster of emotions for you. You gleefully surrender yourself to him, and he enjoys the way your body responds to him when he makes all these moves on you.

He doesn’t have to think twice about leaving hickeys behind, leaving traces of him so you’d have something to remind you of him in his absence. The reddish-purple splotches also served with intent of his claim over you.

Yes, under circumstances, he couldn’t publicly flaunt you and show you off. But when you’re left alone for days and sometimes even weeks, his scent and marks lingers over your home and body. It reminds you that he has you hooked and possessed.

What a shame you’re unable to mark him as you please for obvious reasons. It’s too risky. You have to be extra careful with your mouth and nails. It really does suck, but at least you get to have him to an extent at all, and he’s never shy with the physical affection he brings you when you get together, being more than generous.

“Ride me, babydoll. Like the good girl that you are for me.” Juyeon breathes out, giving your tits a few more kisses.

You fucking adore more than you’d like to admit being called his good girl, so you do as told, raising your hands to hold onto your headboard, followed by raising your hips.

You lift yourself carefully, letting some of his length slide out of you before sucking it back in again. Gasps and groans release from both of you at the sensation.

Juyeon’s hands move to your rear, supporting you in your movements. You start repeatedly moving up and down with breasts, thighs, and butt cheeks jiggling and clapping over his body.

A delicious rhythm has begun with his support. His fingers press into your fleshy ass and his hands on your rear, not being able to resist grabbing your precious peach that fills up his hands. His weighty hands also serve as aid for your movements, working with your hips to glide your pussy walls over his cock.

Getting drilled by his cock and hopping like a bunny over it is mind-numbing pleasure for you. And for him, the sensation of his dick getting stroked repeatedly and penetrating you deeply thanks to this position is mouthwatering.

With you riding him, he has close access to every inch of you. He has a front row seat of your beautiful breasts bouncing and face that appears wrecked and out of it with every plunge.

His cock head hits spots that only he can reach and bless, leaving you two in a state of elated bliss.

He’s unable to keep his hands situated in one spot. They roam freely over your hips, tracing your silhouette and entranced by every inch of you. Parts of you that are usually covered are here for him to see, all for himself, admiring the body that you bear.

In every other bounce he smacks your ass, which in turn, riles you up and gets you even more turned on.

“Juyeon! Fuck!” you breathlessly moan, fingers curling hard into the headboard as you moved your hips in all directions. By this point, Juyeon is meeting your movements with upward thrusts into you and helps you bounce with the palm of his hands. Sweat pearls on his forehead and it glistens especially all down your spine from the desperate activity.

The sex only continues to stay intense, especially when Juyeon starts to practically growl. His thrusts become quicker and harder with him now doing most of the work. He’s relentlessly moving, indicating that he’s close to cumming.

Fucking you was such a high. Your gummy walls gripped his cock fittingly, like your pussy was made for him. He was hitting deep into you. Precum dripped down his tip and spread, creating a mess that mixed with your own arousal. Squelching filled the room alongside sounds of skin slapping, moans, and the bed creaking.

Your being provides a rush to Juyeon. He craved intimacy and a body to keep him warm. You were that body, a person who smiled genuinely when you saw him and asked and listened about how his life’s going.

The sex between you two was phenomenal, but your attitude and way you perceive him is the other part of why he keeps coming back to you.

There’s clearly trust and some sort of bond formed between you both. You kept this relationship, situationship— or whatever the hell this was on the low, protective of his idol life and respecting him.

He relies on you to bring him comfort in any way he needs it, and you give it to him willingly, happy to have him however and whenever you can because you may or may not have fallen in love with him. And maybe, just maybe, he has fallen in love with you, too.

It’s complicated really, to be involved with someone in his position. It’d be hard to have a regular relationship and to keep promises, his life being so on-the-go and unpredictable.

But he can’t stray away from you. It would be better if he let you be with someone else with consistency and he just have casual flings to satisfy his needs. But you two can’t let one another go. You make do with what works for now, and pray one another’s heart doesn’t get broken in the process.

When he’s around you, and especially when your bodies are connected like this, he’s reminded how much he has to keep you in his life. His escape from stress and the real world, the person who keeps him grounded and appreciates all sides of him, from all angles.

These emotional feelings towards you and physically getting his length actively stroked and gripped by your cunt swamps him in a warmth that starts at his lower belly and extends between his legs and cock base.

It’s all he can focus on, that red hot intense pulsing that’s begging to be erupted and relieved.

Juyeon’s tongue runs over his teeth, persistently driving his cock into you. Your mewls and cries from his efforts only charge him, leading his muscles to contract.

A blast of semen finally shoots up into you from his bloated head, followed by more throbs and squirts of cum until he’s emptied out. His head leans back from the electrifying bust, heavy-lidded, biting his lower lip with low grunts.

His hips stutter and movements are sloppy as his warm liquid fills you up. His swollen, hard cock pulsing and spewing inside of you has you swaying and squeezing his shaft.

It’s gratifying watching him cum, that you’re the sole reason why. He shudders and groans as he finishes and from you squeezing him due to being so aroused.

Your hands drop from the headboard to his flushed chest, smoothing sensually over it before hooking your arms around his neck and leaning forward.

You start reaching for your high, boning your hips into him, twirling over his dick that’s growing overstimulated and stimulating your puffy clit.

Desperate breaths and broken mewls leave your throat while Juyeon’s hissing from the sensitivity. Though, he encourages you to finish, talking you through it while groping and slapping your ass in between.

“Keep going, fuck.”

“I’ve got you baby, use me all you want.”

“Cum for me, babydoll.”

And then you break, mouth fallen open, releasing stuttered gasps as your pussy pushes against him. Your muscles are spasming and heart rate is reaching the clouds as you cream all over his cock.

The sensational pleasure that comes with climaxing puts you into a trance. He’s fucked you stupid, mind shutting down to anything that isn’t that tingly pressure releasing that makes you feel giddy and satisfied.

“That’s it, mhmm.” Feels good, huh?” A hand of Juyeon’s begins to rub at your back, his calming touch bringing you back down.

Goosebumps spread all over your skin and all you can do is pant, out of breath. You allow yourself to slowly fall on top of him, his cock now softening and still inside you. Your face digs itself into the crook of his neck, and he brings his other hand to the back of your messy hair, petting your head.

Your warm, sweaty bodies hug together, listening to one another’s irregular breaths and heartbeats make effort to go back to normal.

And for a little while, it seems like time stops. Juyeon’s presence and protective hold shields you like a blanket. He allows your mind to stay peaceful and dreamy, purely basking in him holding you in bed, naked bodies still molded together.

Once you’ve had enough time to come down from the clouds and regain clarity, Juyeon gently pulls himself out of you. The sensation makes you slightly shiver and hiss, and he tongues his cheek at the feeling.

It takes so much in him to not wanna shove his dick back in you when your pretty pussy starts leaking you guys’ mixed fluids. The sight makes him have to hold back a growl to not sound like such an animal.

Luckily, the long night ahead leaves room to spend time together however you liked.

You two forget about the outside world for awhile, too busy indulging in each other.

That consisted of showering together, plenty more sex, and sweet, long conversations that involved subjects like how he feels about the latest song he’s recently recorded for, and reminiscing his trips to Paris for fashion week— of which, has his lips curling subconsciously when he says things like “You would die for this one café I went to” and “Damn, I wish you could come with me next time.”

And you shared things about your life, too. Telling him stuff like your latest online purchase, and the tragic tale of dropping the pizza you tried to carefully take out of the oven the other day— that you still ate, of course!

It was all ordinary stories, small victories in your life recently, and silly jokes in between from you.

But Juyeon liked that. He listened attentively just like you did when hearing him speak.

Hearing you talk about what you had for breakfast or the long-awaited update on your silly family drama meant so much to him. You guys were catching up. Regardless of the contrast in activities and lifestyle, he cares to know about what’s going on with you, big or small. He’s just thankful that he gets to be with you.

You might feel insecure about how mundane your life seemed or worried that you’re boring him, but Juyeon is extremely fond of you. Whatever you said was important to him, because all that matters is that you’re conversing freely with him, together at last.

Before you know it, you two have passed out cuddled-up in your bed.

———————————————————————————

You don’t remember when you fell into slumber, or how long you’ve been out for.

It’s only been a few seconds since you’ve woken up, but what you do realize is there’s no body curled up and pressed against you anymore. The loss of Juyeon near you makes you moan tiredly, shifting loosely.

You worry he’s already gone until you adjust your eyes properly, seeing that his form is standing next to bed, torso bare and barely putting on his pants.

Your sounds and movements show that you’re now fully awake, so he turns to you, leaning over the bed to softly brush your hair.

“Hey, baby. Sorry if I woke you up.” he whispers, watching you rub the sleep out from your eyes, lips swollen, chapped, and pouted.

“What time is it?” your voice comes out low.

“Seven. I gotta get going.” despite his words, he fully sits down next to you, still half-dressed.

You adjust yourself to sit upright. Last night, he had told you that he had a jacket shoot early in the morning, followed by a movie premiere in the evening to attend the next day.

The part you dread greatly has come, where you bid goodbye. It was a set-routine at this point, but it never got easier.

It sounds dramatic, but your interactions with Juyeon were limited and not as frequent as you’d like it to be. His life is extremely demanding, and his personal life had to remain private to protect himself and the people he loves.

So, you had to grow accustomed to not hearing much from him for days, not seeing him as much as you’d like, and only being able to hangout within limited places like your house 90 percent of the time.

Having to navigate your relationship this way leaves a sour taste in Juyeon’s mouth and it worries him that he’s hurting your feelings, but you’re willing to make it work. You’ll always be here for him, supporting him and he’s aware of that. Which is why he feels shitty and blue every time he has to leave you.

You can never get yourself to tell him how much you’ll miss him or love him, so instead, you nuzzle your head against his chest, instantly wrapping your arms around him.

His own arms respond immediately, doing the same over your form. You give him a tight hug, and he just holds you in silence for a minute, wallowing in the comfort of each other.

“I’m still wearing your shirt. You need it back?” you speak up as you take note with your cheek pressing against his bare chest. After getting handsy and dirty with each other for a few rounds, he covered you with his shirt to sleep in, as he did most of the time.

Nah, keep it on. I’ll just grab a new one in the closet. You still have my other shirts here, right?”

You can’t resist in smiling at his words, knowing that yes, you did keep a handful of his clothing stored inside your closet.

What can you say, you liked wearing and stealing his clothes. And, Juyeon encourages it, too. He also likes leaving extra clothing behind here because even though he’s not able to be around as much as he’d like to and you don’t live together, this is still his home.

“Always.” you dotted a tiny kiss over his chest and he hums.

The small gesture and that singular word gives him the biggest urge to pull your lips towards his mouth to kiss you, and he does give into it.

He lets his lips do the talking of how his heart and mind feels, kissing you like there’s no tomorrow, profound feelings of attachment and attraction towards you behind the way his lips move with yours.

You cherish the kiss, just like you did any other with him, never seeming to get enough of him.

After unspoken feelings of love and yearn through kisses and glossy eyes, you two had to let go so Juyeon wouldn’t be late.

Reluctantly, you each let go, and he gets off your bed to walk towards your closet. You sat in bed, watching him while your figure and mind feels like it’s in defeat.

You bunched up the bottom of Juyeon’s shirt that you wear in your hands, clutching tightly onto something that belongs to him. Seeing him get ready to leave feels like a pin stabbing at your heart, deflating it until it collapses, left empty until his next return.

Juyeon is filled with guilt and feels like he’s abandoning you, but he hopes you know that there’s a permanent spot reserved for you in his mind. He’s always thinking of you, selfishly hoping you never forget about him, too.

Once he’s properly dressed, he steers back to you. You try to put on your best smile, trying to conceal the fact that you’re bummed that he always has to leave like this.

Juyeon knows you’re trying your best for him. As if to reassure you and make it known that he appreciates your efforts, he taps your chin with his thumb, getting you to look at him with those doll-like eyes of yours.

He tips down to press a kiss over that adorable bed-head of yours, savoring your scent. You melt under his touch one last time.

“I’ll see you soon, cutie. Okay?” he voices, giving you a small nod.

“Okay.” you whispered, eyes locking once more before he leaves your bedroom and finds his own way out.

You’re left alone on your bed that seems massive and lonely without him in it. You stare at nothing in particular, listening to him step out of your house, doors shutting and locking as he does so.

Now, all you can do is attempt to fall back sleep.

At least in your slumber, you can be closer to him inside your dreams.

𓆩ꨄ︎𓆪𓆩ꨄ︎𓆪𓆩ꨄ︎𓆪𓆩ꨄ︎𓆪𓆩ꨄ︎𓆪𓆩ꨄ︎𓆪𓆩ꨄ︎𓆪𓆩ꨄ︎𓆪𓆩ꨄ︎𓆪𓆩ꨄ︎𓆪𓆩ꨄ︎𓆪𓆩ꨄ︎𓆪

[sangyeonsmuse]

BABYDOLL 𐦍༘⋆

PAIRING: Jock Juyeon + Nerd Changmin & Boyfriend Sunwoo x Cheerleader Reader

WORD COUNT | 4.1k

GENRE Smut

WARNINGS 18+ MINORS DONT INTERACT ‼️, strong laungage, threesome, oral sex, penetration, exhibitionism, sunwoo gets possessive, jealous sunwoo, mature language, this is Literally Porn With Plot, Jock!juyeon, boyfriend!sunwoo, nerd!changmin, exhibitionism, voyeurism, vaginal fingering, male masturbation, unprotected sex, a good amount of praise, degradation , angry Juyeon, dom!sunwoo, pet name babydoll is used. Sex in the school library.

SUMMARY Sunwoo doesn’t like the way Juyeon flirts with you and he knows you well enough to see the way you look at Changmin when you two are alone. He think it’s about time he made it clear just who you belong to. Perhaps it’s about time the two of you made your relationship public.

MORE, I’ve been thinking about this trio a lot lately ever since more babydoll edits started showing up on my fyp again so, here we go.

You and Sunwoo both shared a mutual agreement that your relationship was to stay secretive. After all it all started with a drunken makeout session at one of Kevin and Jacobs wild parties. The only problem was when Sunwoo agreed to keep things a secret he didn’t think it meant watching other guys carelessly flirt with you as if you didn’t already have a boyfriend. Obviously he knew what he had been getting himself into with making you his girlfriend, you were one of the most sought out girls on the cheer team, pretty, top of your class and you were nice to everyone, sometimes a little too nice. Usually Sunwoo would be able to compose himself really well, but the events of today would be all he needs to finally snap.

Not only was it spirit week but it just so happened to fall on the week of homecoming. Knowing you were part of the court it already frustrated Sunwoo to know that you would have to walk in with one of those idiots from the team on your arm, but Lee Juyeon asking you to Homecoming in front of the entire school was not something he thought he would be crossing off his list. Juyeon was someone that already annoyed him when it came to you. His endless flirting, his touchy nature or even all those times hearing Juyeon call you ‘babydoll’ all pissed him off. And right now all he could do was stand there and watch, his tongue poking at the inside of his mouth at how pissed off it had made him. Watching your face as Juyeon approached you with a handful of sunflowers and a sign reading “will you be my sunshine” he could tell that you were a little nervous. The only thing he wasn’t sure of is if the nerves had been from having been put on the spot in front of an entire crowd, or maybe it was the fact that his eyes had been burning holes into both you and Juyeons head.

“I- I’m sorry Juyeon, but I can’t” Sunwoo couldn’t help but walk off with a proud grin on his face once the crowd dispersed. Part of Sunwoo did feel guilty because he had known how excited you were for homecoming, but it wasn’t like the two of you would be showing up together. It had made him feel so guilty that he decided to shoot you a text to meet with him at your usual spot in the school's old computer room.

“Sunwoo?’’ His gaze was torn away from his phone as you entered the room.

“Hello babydoll” as he greeted her the slight annoyance in his voice was evident.

“Sunny please don’t start I didn’t know that he would do that, and you clearly saw me tell him no.’’

“What would you have said if I wasn’t there?’’

“What?”

“You heard me sweetheart what would you have told him if I wasn’t standing there watching the whole thing?’’

“Sun you’re acting ridiculous, why are you asking me that?’’

“Why are you not answering.’’ he was getting slightly annoyed at your ignorance towards the question, part of him felt like if he hadn’t been there you would have said yes. It didn’t go amiss how you would smile and laugh with him whenever he caught the two of you talking at parties or at the games.

“I would have told him no.’’ There was a sudden silence between the two for a moment before you decided to speak again

“I have to go, I promised Mr. Song that I would tutor one of his students.’’ A frustrated sigh spilled from his lips as he watched you leave. He wanted to follow you and apologize for even questioning your loyalty to him, but he knew that if he went after you now he would only make things worse in his current state of mind. So he sat in silence for a while, five short minutes turned into ten long minutes until he realized how ridiculous he had been acting. With a sigh he pulls himself up from the desk and makes his way down the hall, already having a decent idea of where you might have been, after all you always studied in the same place, the school library. As he grew closer he could hear the sound of your laughter the closer he got to the door. That didn’t sound like just studying to him, as he peeked over the doorframe and gazed in he couldn’t help but feel annoyed all over again.

The way your head rested on your palm as you looked at no one other than Ji Changmin. You sat there laughing and smiling as he sat there all pouty.

“You’re cute but being cute won’t make me go any easier on you Changmin.’’ You laugh at Changmin's sulking, seemingly completely unaware that your boyfriend stood right outside the door looking in. Meanwhile a blush formed on Chngmins face from you having called him cute.

“I know you can do better than what you’re showing me Minni. This isn’t the first time i’ve tutored you, you’re pretty smart and i’m sure you know that so I refuse to go easy on you.’’ As you spoke to him your hand rested on Changmin's arm.

To any outsider looking in it would seem like you had just been being sweet and playful, but Sunwoo was well aware of your mannerisms and tone by now. You weren’t simply doing or saying any of those things just to be nice. He was fed up, and now he was feeling like it was about time he put you and everyone else in their place. Turning away from the library entrance he then turned to the direction of the school gym, the place he was more than sure he could find Lee Juyeon. Everyone knew that Juyeon would stay after school to practice, after all he was one of those members on the football team that strived for perfection. When Sunwoo first called out the others name Juyeon was shocked to say the least, of course he was well aware of who Sunwoo was, but the two were entirely different he didn’t think he’d ever find Sunwoo looking for him of all people.

“Yn asked me to pass on a message, she’s waiting for you in the library, something about wanting to apologize or something.’’ Sunwoo tried his best to seem disinterested in the situation, just enough for Juyeons ears to perk up at the sound of your name. Sunwoo simply watched in slight annoyance as Juyeon walked off the field and disappeared back into the school building. He eventually made his way moments later, slowly but surely making his way back to the library where he had watched Juyeon enter just moments before.

“Babydoll!’’ Sunwoo watched as your gaze then shifted from Changmin to Juyeon who was now leaned over the table, his gaze having fallen on Ji Changmin who was sat a little two close to you for Juyeons liking.

“Juyeon what are you doing here?’’

“I told him you were looking for him, sweetheart.’’ Sunwoo finally steps into the library's entrance, taking a step in and he closes and locks the door behind himself.

“Sunwoo?’’

At this point both Changmin and Juyeon had been staring back and forth between the both of you in confusion.

“I think you should apologize to Juyeon for turning him down in front of all of those people princess.” Sunwoo noticed the way your body tensed upon being called that, he was more than sure you were well aware of his annoyance by now. After all he only ever called you such a thing when the two of you were alone and he was planning on being buried deep inside of you. The look on your face was one of both annoyance and panic.

“Um I think i’ll just go maybe we can finish another time.’’ Changmin was ready to take his leave, standing up in his chair, Sunwoos' gaze immediately shot to him making him freeze up on the spot.

“Oh no no not too fast ‘minni’ this won’t take too long.’’ upon hearing your nickname for Changmin you had used only moments ago, it began to set in that Sunwoo had been watching you.

“Okay what the fuck is going on.’’ Juyeon finally snaps, his eyes blazing as he realized he had been set up by Sunwoo.

“Sun.’’

“Quiet babydoll I want you to behave for our two guest. Go ahead and make Changmin a little more comfortable.’’

“Sun..’’

“What is it? What’s the matter babydoll you find him cute don’t you?’’ your eyes said it all, the fact that you had been looking everywhere but into sunwoos eyes said it all.

“Be a good girl and make him feel good while me and Juyeon watch.’’

“Wha-what?’’ Changmin's face had gone bright red, but Sunwoo chose to ignore him.

“Go ahead babydoll.’’

Sunwoo watched as you shyly looked over at Changmin who was obviously nervous.

“Okay what the hell is going on?’’ Juyeon was pissed, pissed at the fact that Sunwoo seemed to have some type of hold on you, even more pissed that he had been tricked into coming here just for this.

“I’m giving you what you want, you think she’s pretty right? Both you and Ji changmin have a crush on My Girlfriend, how cute right Babydoll?’’

“Sun did you really have to bring them into this.’’

“You think you’re allowed to play sweet and innocent with me Princess? I know you and your body well enough to know that you like it when Juyeon here flirts with you, i also know you well enough to know that you’d fuck him or Ji Changmin here without a second thought. Go ahead and take off your clothes for them babydoll..show them how pretty you look.’’ The way you shifted in your seat told him everything that he needed to know, you were getting turned on by this. Him calling you out in front of the two of them.

“Take them off babydoll or i’ll have one of them do it for you.’’ The room fell silent and both Juyeon and Changmin's eyes seemed to be glued onto you as you slowly obeyed Sunwoos' given order. Changmin didn’t think that his face could get any redder until he watched you strip from your white button up and black skirt.

“Good girl.’’ sunwoo takes a seat on the opposite side of the table and spreads his legs, a move you knew all too well. That smirk on his face and the pride in the way he sat was an obvious indication that he was enjoying this. He had you exactly where he wanted.

“Come here sweetheart, I want you to be good for our two guests. As you take a seat on his lap his arms slip around your waist from behind, Sunwoos cold fingers brush against your bare skin as he presses you against his clothed body against yours.

“You’ll be good for them right?” His fingers squeeze your hips in a manner that forces you to stay pressed against him. You gave him a nod which made him give a swift slap across your thigh earning a soft whine.

“Use your words babydoll.”

“I’ll be good sun.”

“That’s my girl, I want you to look at them while I play with you like the pretty little doll you are.” The entire time neither Changmin nor Juyeon said a word. Truth be told neither of them knew what was happening, but the moment their eyes took in your semi naked frame and sat in Sunwoos lap it was hard to look away.

His gaze burned with pride at the fact that he had you right where he wanted and neither Juyeon nor Changmin could do a damn thing unless he allowed it. His fingers immediately met your clit, pushing past your folds and slipping them right inside you with ease.

“I want you to make sure our guests feel included, look them in the eyes and tell them who you want.” His thumb pressed against your clit as he started slowly, thrusting his fingers deep into you like he has done with you thousands of times.

The side of his lips curled into a smirk as he heard the desperate whine that spilled past your plump lips. The moment you opened your mouth to speak he forces in yet another finger, using the three to stretch you out to his liking.

“I'm sorry, what was that? speak babydoll. ” Meanwhile while you struggled with your words both Juyeon and Changmin seemed to be anxiously anticipating who’s name would spill from your pretty lips.

“Ch- Changmin.” You force yourself to breathe out between ragged breaths, the way Sunwoo continuously abuses your clit without letting up, making you squirm in your seat.

“Tell him where you want him doll.” Without hesitation he slipped in two more fingers, taking the time to stretch your walls and feel you out before he began to thrust them in and out slowly. The way you whine for him to move them faster only causes him to slow them down, he was well aware doing this would only make it harder for you to respond but he didn’t seem to care. His fingers thrust further into your cunt with every loud cry that left your mouth.

“Mm my mouth, sun please.” A chuckle spilled from Sunwoos lips at how desperate you sounded.

“Look at you whining like a desperate little doll for some nerd you’re tutoring to fuck your pretty little mouth when your boyfriends fingers are deep in your pretty little cunt.” His eyes shot to Chagmin whose eyes were glued to his fingers that were buried deep inside of you.

“Well you heard her right? You gonna give her what she wants?”

“Mm S-Sun, what about Juyeon.” Your sudden inclusion of Juyeon made his eyebrow quirk up in pure amusement.

“You want them both sweetheart? You want me to watch while they both have their way with you right doll?” He leaves a loving kiss on your neck before pulling his fingers out of you and patting your thigh.

“sit pretty up on the table for them then and let them know what you want.” Sunwoo sat back in his seat watching as you shyly took a seat up on the table.

“Don’t act all shy now baby you weren't acting shy a couple minutes ago when you were begging me to let them have their way with you.”

“I want Ju to eat me out while I take care of Minni.” He chuckles as you look away from him, a slight blush on your cheeks at having to admit it to him.

“Well then was that so hard princess? Go ahead and help them out then.”

Sunwoo watched as you moved between the two, helping them both get out of their pants while they took off your remaining clothes. Now here you were completely naked and exposed, trapped between two men that were working together to completely destroy you. Juyeons lips wrapped around your sensitive clit while Changmins Cock completely filled your mouth, swallowing up every one of your moans.

You had seemed so shy before but now that they had loosened you up you seemed to take it all so well. It seemed like a dream to you Changmins brown eyes gazing down at you through his glasses as he tugged at your hair and fucked your pretty mouth. All while Juyeon sat behind you forcing you to sit on his face and take the abuse of his tongue. For Changmin seeing you between his legs now is quite a treat, especially the way your tongue swirls around his tip and scoops up his arousal. He couldn’t believe it was real, a girl he had fantasized about multiple times struggling to take the abuse of him down her throat.

“She takes it so well doesnt she? .” Sunwoos' gaze burned into you as he watched the scene before him. You weren’t sure why he was letting this happen but at the time you were too caught up in Juyeon and Changmin to care

Changmin breathlessly mumbles out soft curses when you start to bob your head, brushing fingers through your hair and pulling the strands away from your mouth. you moan at that, squeezing his length and forcing him down your throat. You looked a complete mess, your vision clouded with tears and fucked up mascara while saliva coated your chin and plump lips. One look at you and Changmin groans upon seeing your now ruined makeup all because of the way he was abusing your throat. you’re eagerly motivated now, taking him with more consideration but your mouth’s still as hot as ever. He lets out a small moan, letting you go at your own pace no matter how much he wanted fuck your face. you run a long stripe up the bottom of his length, thumb playing with his tip while his eyes stay fixated on you taking him down your throat so well.

“You're doing so well, babydoll.” Sunwoo chuckles upon seeing the way the tears continuously formed within your eyes.

To Changmin your mouth felt like heaven. Using your hands to pump the areas you’re not able to reach, the way you hollow out your cheeks around him immediately shuts him up. You pull him out of your mouth with a plop, a string of saliva connecting him to your lips as you move in to suck just the tip. Lewd moans spew from your lips upon feeling Juyeons tongue work against your clit. You look down at him which was proven to be a mistake because it immediately made your brain go fuzzy.

Juyeon showed no mercy, not letting up for a second even as your legs trembled, slurping up the juices that drip from your clit loudly. The moment you try to jerk away from him his grip on your thighs tighten and he pushes his tongue further between your folds.

“Don’t move, Babydoll,” He groans wrapping a forearm around your thighs and just eats. He

flicks his tongue over your clit while using his fingers to stretch you out groaning at the way your cunt pulsing and gripping his digits. you’re snapped out of your daze when Changmin forces you to look back at him and shoves his cock back into your throat. Mere seconds later Juyeon gives a few slaps onto your clit as a warning to not take your eyes away from Changmin.

you give him an apologetic look before slurping your saliva off his cock. He hums while you continue the bobbing of your head and the moans that you let out around him send vibrations up his body. Changmin twitches in your mouth and his thigh tenses. All while you could feel something burning within your core begging for your release.

“Better hold it princess, if you cum before Changmin i’ll make sure you can’t do it again when i fuck you.” Sunwoo chimes in from the side making you whine.

Despite hearing that Juyeon wasn’t letting up, licking one last stripe before gathering his saliva into a ball and he spits onto your clit, sight so lewd that if you could see it you'd have cum immediately. he admires how the way it runs down your cunt and mixes with your arousal that he couldn’t help but wish for it to be his cum instead. Your eyes roll back the moment he rubs in his spit, a thumb on your bud while he continues to move his fingers and your thighs are already trembling from how he seems to know all your sweet spots in such a short period of time.

“Yn—” Changmin moans, gets breathy and choked the closer he is to his high, hips bucking up into your mouth. the drool that drips from the corners of your mouth and the sounds of your mouth being so full of his cock sends him into a frenzy.

“Remember we don’t waste babydoll.” At Sunwoos words you whine, the slurping and gawking noises getting faster before you’re taking his cock with a gasp, pumping him while your dilated eyes look up to him and him only. He pulls on your hair before you both cum together, your cum spilling out onto Juyeons lips and face all while Changmin spills all down your throat. An overload hits your tongue and the back of your throat and you nearly spit it back up but force yourself to keep it down.

Unfortunately for you, it was not over, Sunwoo immediately lifted you up from the table, taking you into his lap and spreading your thighs apart.

“Now you’re gonna take care of Juyeon while I show them i’m the only one that can fuck you like the pretty doll you are.” While your lips wrapped around Juyeons Cock Your eyes rolled back immediately as Sunwoo pushed himself inside of you until he fully bottomed out. Your tightness earned a low growl from him as he pushed so deep you could have sworn you felt him hit the top of your stomach. He watched the blissed out look on your face with every little thrust inside you.

“Look at you taking me so well, I bet you loved every bit of Juyeon and Changmin working together to destroy you babydoll.” A chuckle spilled past his lips and he immediately spread your legs wider and pulled your thighs up against your chest. Your moans were evident enough that whatever pain you felt if any had gone away. He waisted no time fucking into you, rough and feverish thrusts from the very beginning. Thrusts that caused your eyes to roll to the back of your head so hard you saw stars.

Your nails dug so deep into his thighs that you nearly drew blood. your moans sent vibrations over Juyeons cock, making him throw his head back and pull at your hair, lines of saliva dripping down your chin as each of your moans were swallowed up by him thrusting into your throat.

“Youre such a pretty little doll baby, look at you being so good for the three of us.” Sunwoo immediately leans down to place kisses on your neck, your nipple between his fingers while his other hand fondles your breasts. The pleasure had been overwhelming your bodies in ways you hadn’t thought to be possible. From the feeling of his fingers against your breasts to every time he thrusted in to you feeling like the more he fucked the deeper into your stomach his cock seemed to push.

“From now on you will make it known that you’re mine. Mine to kiss, to touch to fuck. You’re gonna tell every single guy that approaches you that you belong to someone. understand babydoll?” Your thoughts had been so cloudy that you could barely even make out anything he had been talking to you about.

“Such a pretty little whore gonna cum all over my cock after getting used like a slut other men.” He immediately rested one hand on your waist while resting the other on your stomach and pushing down. He wanted to feel just how far his cock could go inside your little frame. This action was all it took to push you over the edge, the moment he pushed down upon your stomach your legs shook and it was a glorious sight for all of them to see, to see you squirt upon the impact of his hand. As you were finally able to pry your eyes open you felt butterflies in the pit of your stomach. The sight of Changmins hands wrapped around his Cock and sweat dripping down his forehead as he watched both Juyeon and your boyfriend work tinder to ruin you.

Your legs shook violently as Sunwoos thrusts grew in speed and the low growls that spilled from his mouth made it all more easy for you to unravel right then and there, your cum spilling out onto his cock followed by Juyeons release down your throat mere seconds later. Sunwoo wasnt too far behind as the fucked out look on your face and the way you clenched around him was all he needed for him to spill into you, him and Changmin both finishing at the same time.

“You two, from now on stop flirting with my fucking girlfriend.” Slipping his head into the crook of your neck he sucks harshly, leaving evidence that you were now tainted by him, a true indication that you belonged to him and no one else

[winterchimez]

A New Beginning With You | Lee Juyeon

SUMMARY: it has been a couple of years since you and your childhood best friend, Juyeon, went on your separate ways. Years later, you were given the opportunity to return to Seoul to pursue a new career, only to find out that your new employer is the one you have been dreading to see. Will you toss away all of the emotions again, or will you finally come to terms and fix this broken relationship with him?

PAIRING: ceo!Juyeon x f!reader

GENRE: office au, ex-childhood friends to lovers, coming of age, angst, fluff

WARNINGS: nc-17, slow-burn, this is pretty angsty ngl 😭, betrayal, several heart wrenching moments (it takes a while for both Juyeon and reader to figure out their emotions), language (one curse word), miscommunication, alcohol consumption, reader gets drunk a couple of times, several heated arguments, petnames (princess, sweetheart), kissing

WORD COUNT: 15,466

A/N: here is my submission for deoboyznet's holiday exchange event!! boo @cloverdaisies i'm your secret santa 🎅👀 ngl i did struggle with the prompts that you gave mainly cs i don't usually read/watch coming of age works so i hope i did this fic justice 🥹🥹🥹 big big shoutout to @momhwa-agenda for choosing the banner, also helping me to beta read (along with @from-izzy @juyeonszn) sending my unending kisses and hugs to all of you 😘💕

Seven years ago 

“What do you mean you’re leaving?” 

It all just felt so sudden, and you weren’t sure if you were hallucinating as you heard those words that came out from the mouth of your best friend for the past seventeen years. You both have made a promise to one another since you both were in kindergarten that no matter how big or small the situation may be, you both will always have each other’s backs and that no secrets were to be kept from one another, even if they may feel like you have been punched right into the face during the aftermath of it all. 

Or that was what you thought. 

“Y/N…I had no control over anything…you do know how my father often has to travel across the globe for his job—”

“But that doesn’t change the fact that you decided to keep it a secret from me when you first discovered that you were potentially going to follow your father’s footsteps for his company.” 

From the beginning, you knew that Juyeon’s father worked at a relatively elite corporate company. Because of his status, he was often sent away to various countries to fulfill his job. It has been decades since his father has been in and out of Seoul, and he would often travel on his own not wanting to bother his family and wanting them to have a peaceful life here. 

Never in a million years would you have thought that he would bring his entire family along with him as he starts a new chapter in his life in the States, and also get Juyeon to follow in his father’s footsteps. 

You were on the verge of crying, your cheeks were heating up, and you had unintentionally balled up your fists, clearly failing terribly to suppress the anger and betrayal you felt. 

“I just don’t get it, Juyeon. You have always wanted to pursue basketball. Hell, you have even sought a sports scholarship to get into one of the prestigious universities in Seoul! Why are you giving up now?” You huffed. 

You could tell that he was showing some reluctance in his answer, and truthfully, he didn’t really know how to give you an answer, either. But he decided to reply in the most plausible and fitting one that was right for the current situation you both were in. 

“Family has to always come first, Y/N. If it were for my family's future, especially my stay-at-home mother and younger brother, I would do anything to ensure my father and I can provide for them.” 

You scoffed. “Bullshit.” 

You took a few steps forward until you were merely inches apart. Looking straight into Juyeon’s eyes, you could tell he felt the same way and was also trying to hold back his tears. 

“You’re not the Juyeon I know. My Juyeon, who has been right by my side ever since we were kids, would always go above and beyond to work for what he truly wants. He is never afraid to voice his opinion, and he would do anything to ensure his happiness would be fulfilled no matter the consequences.” 

Finally, the tears that you have held back for so long began dripping down your face as you began to hit him simultaneously on his chest.  

“What exactly happened to you, Juyeon?”

At the same time, tears clouded his vision as a single teardrop dripped onto his face. You could tell that something was holding him back from telling you the truth, if any, and his following answer would break you down even more.

“I’m sorry, Y/N.”

With that, a black car pulls up at the school entrance, revealing his younger brother rolling down the window to call out for his big brother. You could see multiple pieces of luggage lined up at the back trunk of the car, and they were ready to head straight to the airport. 

With a glance back to signal to his family that he would be coming shortly, he turned to you to apologise once more before gently pushing you away to leave.

“I’m really sorry, Y/N. I wish you all the best in your future as you enter university and eventually the workforce.” 

Just like that, Juyeon quickly sped down the stairs and opened the door to the car before settling in. Within seconds, his parents, sitting in the front seats, gave you a little wave before they drove away right through the exit. 

Almost instantly, all of the built-up tension was suddenly released from you all at once, and you finally broke down crying at the entrance of your high school. What you thought would be a memorable, happy graduation for you both as you parted ways with your youth years turned out to be one sad separation from your best friend. 

You both planned your summer holidays with one another before officially enrolling in university in the autumn. You were going to head to Busan for a five-day trip during the first month, going to visit your aunt who lived on the outskirts of Seoul to help her in her fieldwork (especially when she has a soft spot for Juyeon), and even going to visit all of the bazaars that were going to be held in central Seoul. 

There were so many potential activities and times you could have had with one another, and you were even planning to propose to Juyeon that you wanted to be more than just childhood friends. 

Because you have been having an insane crush on him since you were kids, and you realised it was love by the time you both entered high school.

Unfortunately, it was too late to confess your love to him, as he was now long gone, heading straight to the airport before he eventually said his final goodbye to his home for the past seventeen years, Seoul. 

Maybe it was fate that you both were just not meant to be with one another; perhaps it was why his father had no choice but to bring his whole family with him to start a new life in the States. 

For the first time, you cursed and blamed yourself for having such hope and planning a potential future with someone who was clearly out of your league, and you thought it had all been a waste of time since the beginning. 

With that, the little needle-felted cat you have been hiding and made last night was released from your grips as he fell towards the stairs and eventually towards the ground. As you noticed, more tears kept welling up in your eyes, and you brought both hands to cover your face, not wanting to care about anything right now. 

I shouldn’t have had so much hope. I was stupid enough actually to fall in love with you, Juyeon.

Present Day 

“Oh, Y/N! Looks like your article just got published in the London Mail this morning!” 

Your co-worker gave you a little pat on the back before he placed the newspapers right onto your desk, and it was clear how your article was published right on the front page with your name written very obviously at the right corner. 

“Please, it was nothing. It’s what I do all the time,” you replied bluntly. 

“What do you mean it was nothing? You just interviewed the rising actor of the month! That’s big news, and you deserve to celebrate it!" 

“Please, it really is nothing—” 

“Hey everyone, our department needs a little night out after work at the local pub! We’re toasting to Y/N’s big break in the news today!” 

Your co-worker shouted out loud, and eventually, cheers erupted in the office, everyone congratulating you and thinking about the potential drinks and songs they would go for once work is over. 

You smiled and chuckled at the sight. You have always loved your job and are grateful to have met such a fantastic group of people in this company. 

It wasn’t your dream to pursue the path of becoming a reporter in the beginning. Sure, you have always had a passion for writing, but you have always considered it your hobby. Thanks to your sister, who was studying abroad in Manchester then, who convinced you to take that leap of faith and turn that hobby into a potential job. 

So here you were, living the best of your life. You followed your sister’s footsteps and went on to live abroad in the UK, enrolling in the University of Manchester, where you successfully graduated with honours the past year. Thankfully, you secured a place in the London Mail right after graduation due to your outstanding grades. 

The move from Manchester to London was a bit tough, but you initially managed to pull through with your sister and her boyfriend's help. They were kind enough to help you settle down and stayed with you for the first couple weeks before returning to Manchester. You miss your sister’s presence, but you know that eventually, you had to venture out on your own and face reality as an adult. 

It has been a year, and you have adapted to living alone. Often, things would get tough, but it was also thanks to you having such a fantastic team of colleagues that you were able to pull through it all, even when there were times you had to work overtime to fulfill all of the datelines that were pilling up nonstop, especially during the holiday seasons. 

It wasn’t until recently that your article was accepted and published on the main cover page of the news, and that was when you finally earned your big break after a year. The company has deemed you to be one of the most talented youngsters they have had over the past decade, and they were more than happy to have had you as their employee. 

Since then, things have settled down for you as you got a pay rise and had fewer hours to give you more time to rest well, mainly when you only survived with four to five hours of sleep daily. Now, you can eat your breakfast correctly and get a good seven to eight hours of sleep before coming every day. 

Just as your co-workers were having the time of their lives trying to figure out the plans for tonight after work, your office desk telephone rang, and you picked it up hastily, thinking that you’d have another big scoop to write about

But it was from the CEO. 

“Miss Y/N, please report to my office immediately.”

You were back home after that fun night out at your local pub with your co-workers, holding a beer in hand as you FaceTime your sister over the phone. 

“Well, it’s a good opportunity for you, don’t you think, Y/N?” 

“I’m not too sure about all of this, sis. Like yeah, it would be great that I would be back home, but still—”

“Hey, I know mom would be ecstatic to have you back in Seoul with her. And it just so happened that you have been telling me how you recently began feeling a little homesick. I’d say it would be great for you to take up the offer.” She reassured. 

It was the moment your mouth fell open wide when you heard that you had been offered to be a senior reporter for one of Seoul’s top magazines at the moment, GQ Korea, where you would be interviewing potentially all of the current well-known celebrities in the country and getting a higher pay as well. 

It seems that they have come across your contributions from the London Mail, and they were keen to have you on their team. Your first thought was grateful as your works were recognised globally, but also because you miss being home. But another part of you has already settled in the UK, so you weren’t sure if leaving now would be the right choice. 

But now that your sister has given you some input, that was when you knew that it wouldn’t hurt to try it out, at the very least. 

With one final sip of your beer, you leaned forward and gave your sister a smile for the first time since calling her this evening. 

“I’m going home now, sis.”

It has been a week since you settled into Seoul, and you have loved being back in your comfort zone: the culture, the food, and the environment you grew up in. 

Your mom was overjoyed as she picked you up from the airport, insisting she would take your luggage, especially when you have flown almost twenty-four hours just to get home. By the time you got home, your mom was already ready and prepared with all the dishes she had premade before your arrival and needed to heat them quickly. 

You quickly took a shower before joining her at the dining table. You both chatted for close to midnight before she told you she would sleep ahead of you. Meanwhile, you decided to clean up your childhood bedroom to make space for everything you brought back from London. 

There was this nostalgia as you entered your room; everything was still the same, exactly how you had left it when you left for the UK years ago. The same old blue painting on the wall, all your posters hung on them, even your favourite comic books that were still arranged nicely on your bookshelf. 

You could tell there wasn’t a speck of dust in the room, indicating that your mom must have cleaned it occasionally. You couldn’t help but sigh, thinking about all the hard work she always puts herself through. 

It took you a while to go through all your belongings, mainly because you were reminiscing as you looked at the pictures, books, and figurines scattered throughout your room.

It wasn’t until you came across a box tucked away at the corners of your room that you pulled them out towards the centre as you opened them up. 

And god, you wished you hadn’t done that. 

All the pictures and items contained memories you had with your past lover, Lee Juyeon. 

You paused momentarily before reaching out to pick up the first item on top of the box: a picture. 

It was taken when you both were in kindergarten. You were holding hands, wearing backpacks and little yellow helmets on your heads. You couldn’t help but smile at the sight; it was nostalgic and cute. 

Right after that, you took out a pair of bracelets right below the picture. It was a friendship bracelet that you both made during middle school. It was summer when you recently discovered the trend of making friendship bracelets, where you went straight to Juyeon’s house across the street, practically dragged him back to your house, and got him to make one with you. You giggled at the thought of how Juyeon was so lost at the time, having to come to you almost every five seconds to tell you that he had either lost a piece or was having trouble threading the beads through the string. 

When you thought it would all be good memories, you stumbled upon the one item you wished you would not have to see again.

The needle-felted cat you made for him on the night before graduation. 

Unbeknownst to you, your hands began to tremble as you took the cat into your hands, staring at it as the memories flashed back: how you would give this to Juyeon and tell him that you were ready to be more than just close friends, up to the point of how he suddenly announced to you that he was leaving for good. 

Slowly, you felt that your tears were beginning to well up in your eyes, and you quickly dumped all of the items back into the box and tucked them back in the corner, using a few items you had in your room, such as cardboard to block it completely out of sight. 

You were not ready to go through all of the roller coasters of emotion once again. 

Especially when deep down in your heart, you still had some feelings left for him. Even if you did not wish to admit it out loud.

You stood outside the tall building as you tried your best to fix up the blazer that your mum insisted you put on for your big day. With your handbag and laptop, you gave yourself a deep breath before mentally preparing yourself that this would be your new workplace from now on. 

You looked to see the vast sign plastered outside the building: GQ Korea. You were definitely at the right place. It took you a few seconds to finally be able to take your very first steps into the building. Once you did, you were amazed at the astonishing art that filled the reception floor. It was a fashion and art magazine; after all, there was no doubt that the company's directors entailed such a choice of decorations to captivate everyone who walked into their building. 

You walked straight towards the counter, where you were greeted by two ladies who were already expecting your arrival. Immediately, they got you signed up in the system, and one guided you to one of the fifth floors, where you would be meeting your new team and department that you would be working with. 

As you were guided into the head of the department’s office, Ms Kim, who has been guiding and overlooking this particular department for the past five years, greeted you and made you feel comfortable instantly, which made all of your tensed-up muscles relax fairly quickly. She communicated well with you and, surprisingly, even shared some of the same ideals as you did. You were beyond grateful to hear when she mentioned that she has kept up with your works from the London Mail, and it was about time that the team needed someone like you. 

Once both of you had taken the time to break the ice, Ms Kim led you to your desk just outside her office, where countless cubicles filled the entire floor. At first glance, you have estimated that there were about fifty employees who worked in this department. It didn’t take them long to greet you personally before you eventually made your way to your desk in the middle of the floor. 

As you unloaded your bag of materials onto the desk and placed them in an organised manner, your hands digging through your bag finally stopped when you felt a familiar material. Instantly, you pulled it out to check what it was, and you were once again left speechless with what it was. 

A picture of you and Juyeon back during your graduation from high school.

The only plausible reason it was in your workbag was because of your mother. You have never once told her that things ended badly between you both, and you have always shrugged off the fact that you were still keeping in touch with the man himself and that you both were still having a healthy friendship. You just didn’t want her to worry much, especially when she knew how much you both have been through, and she practically treated Juyeon like her own son. 

As all loving mothers would do, she woke up hours ahead of you this morning to prepare you a filling bento box. She wrapped it with traditional cloth and placed it neatly into your work bag. At the same time, she probably put the little picture frame into the bag, hoping it would motivate you during work and decorate your new workplace. 

With just a few seconds of staring at it, you looked down to see an empty trash bin that sat right beneath your work desk, and without thinking much, you immediately placed the picture right into it. 

I’m sorry, mom. But I will not be needing it anymore.

Your first week of work flew by quickly as you easily got used to the working lifestyle. Seoul was your home, and it wasn’t hard to adapt back to the culture. In fact, you were grateful that your new group of co-workers could be on par with the ones back in London; they were all as great and supportive in helping you ease into the new environment. Your new co-workers even encouraged you to head out for a little drink at the local izakaya restaurant after work since it has been a long weekend for everyone, and you surely did enjoy the little company you had before heading home a little after midnight. 

In terms of fitting in as GQ Korea's new reporter, it has been a thrilling ride learning about all of the entertainment biz that has been going on in the country. Since your forte was with celebrities, your head of department had assigned you the same, focusing on the rising K-Pop stars in the industry. 

It has been a while since you kept up with Korean celebrities since you mainly focused on Western artists abroad for a couple of years. But as you kept up with the news and made sure to read the newspaper first thing every morning you came right in, you made sure that you have been kept up to date with all of the latest announcements and events that have been going on in the industry. 

Today was a big day for you as Ms Kim had instructed you to head up to the top floor, where you would first meet up with the CEO for the very first time since joining the company as he would like to brief you through the details in regards to the celebrities that will be coming later in the day.

You thought it was probably some hotshot celeb for the CEO to personally guide you through each step regarding what or how you should deal with them. However, you weren’t too mad since you figured they probably did things differently here in Seoul.

As you finally reached the top floor, you were then escorted by whom you assumed to be the CEO’s personal assistant, who was already expecting your arrival as they kindly let your head department know that she was free to leave. The walk down the hallway towards the CEO’s office seemed a little daunting to you for some reason; perhaps it was also because you were meeting someone who is considered to be one of the famous people in the heart of Seoul—there’s a reason why GQ Korea is always on the top-selling markets. 

As the assistant kindly knocked on the door and got a verbal cue from the other side, she took a step behind to let you move forward as you slowly turned the doorknob to enter the room. 

Immediately, you notice how the entire office is decorated extravagantly, filled with tons of high-end decorations that suit the taste of the CEO himself. The wide, clear windows dominated most of the room, offering a panoramic cityscape view. A curated selection of artwork filled the walls, which added a little personal touch to the working space. 

You didn’t realise that your mouth was wide open as you slowly took in the mesmerising view until you turned towards the desk, where the CEO was sitting on his chair with his back facing you, flipping through multiple documents in his hands. 

As you slowly made your way towards him, your little footsteps made the CEO’s ears perk up, causing the man to stand up and finally turn to face you in person for the first time. 

With that, your entire world seemed to pause for a moment. 

What exactly was going on? There was no way this young man could be the CEO, especially when you were certain that he had left Seoul years ago and sworn that his chances of returning to his homeland would be close to zero. Your laptop in hand was slowly beginning to slip off before you were brought back to reality and quickly caught it before it eventually hit the ground. 

That was when you finally muttered your first words since stepping into the CEO’s office. 

“J-Juyeon…?” 

It was pretty evident that the man himself was just as confused and shocked as you were; he practically stood there motionless, trying his best to make sense of the current situation.

“Y-Y/N? What are you doing here?” 

“I should be the one asking you that,” you replied. 

You were about to go haywire just from this interaction alone. It was hard enough for you to move on from what happened seven years ago, and it proved to be a lot harder than you thought when you came back a few weeks ago to see that all of the things that you’ve tried so hard to forget were now back in the comforts of your bedroom. 

Ever since then, you had promised yourself that you wouldn’t want anything to do with Juyeon anymore, and you have decided to shut your heart regarding anything related to the man himself. 

If only it were easier said than done. 

Juyeon finally took his first step away from his desk as he slowly approached you, extending his hand as if he was craving your touch again. You could tell that he was desperate for a little physical contact, perhaps to prove that you really stood in front of him. 

But you couldn’t, and you weren’t ready for any of that, so you backed off instead, giving him a clear signal that you weren’t on the same page as he was. 

There was this evident sadness in his eyes, and he tried his best to hold back his tears as his eyes began to water. 

“Y/N…I—”

“Miss L/N. You can address me that, Mr. Lee,” you bluntly replied before diverting your attention to the ground. 

It was when Juyeon finally got himself together and straightened his posture before clearing his throat. “Very well, Miss L/N. I’ll quickly brief you on the events happening today, with the group of celebrities arriving in a couple of hours soon. Please, have a seat.”

“I hate him, I really do!” You screamed at the top of your lungs as you took the pint of beer in your hands before slamming it down onto the table. Your sister had to restrain you from causing a scene at the bar, trying to settle you down and handing you a glass of water to chug down your system. 

Your sister had just recently came back to Seoul for a little vacation, and you immediately asked that she could keep you accompany down at the local izakaya restaurant that you often visited to let off some steam. 

“Karma is really on your side huh, Y/N,” your sister teased. 

“I-It’s not funny, sissy….” your voice began to slur, indicating that you were starting to get drunk at this point. “Why…of all people, why?! Why did it have to be him? As my boss! In my new workplace!” 

“Look, it can’t be that bad. Who knows, maybe you might get another chance again with him.” 

“That’s not the point, sissy….after what he has done to me? After all that I have done to try my best to move on from the past? This should not be happening to me at all!” Your voice broke as you began tearing up, causing your sister to pull you close into her embrace, slowly caressing your back to help soothe you a little. 

Your sister was well aware of your history with Juyeon, especially when you’ve spent weeks, which eventually that turned into months of crying out to her over the phone since she was already studying abroad then, she knew how much the whole situation wrecked you badly, to the point that it has taken you months to start going out and meeting people outside of university eventually. 

She was there when you were both younger, seeing how you developed a crush on him later and knowing you weren’t just childhood friends and had something way more than that. It was a shame that Juyeon left without telling you, and she would’ve gone to the airport to confront him about it if only she had been back in Seoul then. But deep down, she knew Juyeon as much as you did and knew that suddenly, something probably came up for him to leave the country like that. 

As a matter of fact, your sister had always wished and rooted for you both to become a couple eventually; she had always been a firm believer of childhood friends to lovers anyway, especially when that was how she ended up with her current fiancé. Now that you both have reunited in the most unexpected way, she believes her theory about you both eventually having a second chance was stronger than ever before. 

With that, she lifted her eyebrows as if she had just come up with a brilliant idea. “Say, little sis. What exactly are you up to at work tomorrow?” 

You sniffled. “Umm…I guess I have a meeting with Juyeon to discuss the upcoming fashion show that is due to be set in a couple of months. Why do you ask?” 

Your sister gave you a little smirk in return before cradling you like a baby again. “Oh, it was nothing. I’m sure you’ll have a fruitful discussion tomorrow.”

You dreaded coming to work today. The very first reason is that you woke up with a really bad hangover from last night, and you practically don’t remember much that has happened besides chugging down pints of beer from your system. It has been a while since you’ve drank this much, and most importantly, because you were upset over something. Otherwise, you were pretty much sober most of the time and always being the one to drag your co-workers home because they were far worse than you were. 

And, of course, it was also because you hated the idea that you must come face-to-face with your so-called ex-childhood best friend again—this time, in an actual meeting. Well, in some ways, you were glad that it was only a meeting for a potentially massive event that the company had been known to host for years and that Juyeon would probably be able to distinguish between personal and work-life issues. 

But still, you just weren’t ready to face him again, especially with the huge shock you’d received the day before. It was already hard enough for you to stay focused when Juyeon briefed you through your job scope and the meeting you would have for the day, trying your best not to let the tears drip down nor let the anger boil up. 

However, you had no choice since you must also stay professional at your work. You just got back to Korea, and there was no way you would chicken out and move everything back to the UK again. Well, potentially, you could, but it wouldn’t be an ethical move to make. 

So here you are, hugging your documents and laptop towards your chest, standing outside the meeting room. You had to take a few deep breaths before you could muster up the courage to turn the doorknob and enter the room. 

Once you did, you noticed how the entire room was filled up, with most of your co-workers in their designated seats, sorting through the documents they would use for the meeting. You immediately diverted your attention towards the front where Juyeon was seated, and you hated how you had actually spent a good minute admiring his features. 

He wore a simple beige coat over a white tee, paired with a pair of black slim pants with leather shoes. His black hair was styled all the way back, leaving a little strand of hair down on his forehead. He was busy flipping through his documents while setting up his laptop to project the PowerPoint slides for everyone to see. 

You just hated how extremely good-looking he was right now and that there was a high chance that you wouldn’t concentrate on your work throughout the next hour. 

And how you would actually want to run into his embrace and give him a little peck on the lips—

Wait, what? 

As Juyeon finally lifted his head from the monitor and looked at everyone else in the room, it was a sign that the meeting was about to commence, and you quickly took the still available seat, the front seat. 

Throughout the presentation, you tried your best to take in everything that Juyeon- well, your CEO, was trying to convey to his employees. It turns out that this upcoming fashion show would be one of the most crucial ones the company has ever done for years, especially now that all the big brands are willing to collaborate with GQ Korea and put out the best fashion show in the country. 

It was quite a breathtaking look to see how Juyeon was passionate about his job, talking and explaining each detail to his employees carefully while making it enjoyable for everyone to learn or be part of. With that, you have noticed how every single employee in the room was constantly taking down details as quickly as lightning, making sure not to miss out on any small detail. There were moments when some would raise their hands to ask further questions, and Juyeon was more than happy to answer them, making the whole meeting seem less stressful but instead quite engaging in return. 

There were times when you found yourself staring at him more than you should’ve, and every time he diverted his attention towards you, you would quickly duck your head down to look back at your laptop as if you were busy typing away on your notes. 

Time seemed to have passed quickly as Juyeon finally wrapped up the meeting and let everyone off. In fact, the meeting ended right at the dot, and it was just past noon, meaning it was lunchtime for all employees. Everyone was quick to dash through the door, their stomach grumbling after using up all of the energy for the meeting. For you, you decided to pack up your belongings at your own pace, knowing that you would be spending your lunch back at your cubicle with the little bento box your mother had packed for you this morning. 

As you are about to head straight for the door, the familiar voice stops you in your tracks, making you turn your head back to face the man himself. 

“Miss L/N, I would like to have a word with you.” 

Oh, god. It’s here. 

Mentally, you were cursing out all the vulgar words you knew at the back of your mind as you slowly approached your CEO, trying your best not to let out the croak in your voice. 

“Y-Yes, may I help you, Mr Lee?” 

“There is a place that I have to pay a short visit, and I would like you to keep me company.”

Whenever an employer or the CEO would address their employees to keep them company as they pay a visit to a certain location, it usually meant that it was to meet up with a client or to survey certain products or places that could significantly be crucial for the company’s success. 

But here you were, sitting in one of the fancy cafes that wasn’t far from the office, having lunch with your CEO, who was sitting in front of you. 

Juyeon said nothing along the way as he brought you to the cafe, insisting that you sit down and order from the menu with no questions asked. As awkward as it was, you were about to deny his request before he looked straight down towards the menu, not even glancing at you. 

You figured this was probably part of the job, and there was no way you would deny your CEO’s request right here and then, especially when it was working hours and everything was strictly business. 

Once both of you have made your orders to the waitress that just passed by a minute ago, you diverted your attention towards the tablecloth, not wanting to look straight at Juyeon. However, his deep voice caught your attention, and you lifted your head back up after hearing the words you had wanted to say for the past seven years. 

“I think it’s about time I told you the truth, Y/N.” 

Oh, he called you by your name. 

As you focus your attention right on him, you can see the sadness in his eyes once more, just like how it was back when you first encountered him in his office the day before. 

“Umm…with due respect Mr Lee—”

“Juyeon is fine. We’re outside of work, Y/N. I would appreciate it if you could talk to me like we used to, and I will do the same,” he responded, slowly resting his arms on the tablecloth as if he were leaning slightly closer to you. 

With that you took a significantly big gulp, knowing that the day you longed for was finally here. You were about to get the answers you desperately needed to know, but at the same time, you weren’t so sure if you wanted to know the truth right now, especially with all of the things that you have gone through trying your best to take him out of your life completely. 

“Will you please give me a chance to listen to what I have to say?” He pleaded, looking at you with a desperate look in his eyes. 

Your gut and mind were trying to tell you that you have done your best to completely eliminate him in your life for the past seven years. Would you give up easily and open your enclosed heart just like that? After all of the hard work that you have done? 

Say no, Y/N. You have gotten over the guy. It’s all over between you two—

“Yeah. Go on.” 

Goddammit, Y/N. 

Immediately, his eyes lit up upon your words, and his shoulders slumped down a little, indicating that he has relaxed a bit. 

“Oh, thank god, Y/N. I guess you were still the same old Y/N that I remembered—”

“You said we’re not employers and employees now, so I’d say cut to the chase with what you have to say while you can, Juyeon,” you bluntly replied as you crossed your arms around you. 

In return, Juyeon gave you a little weak smile and a sigh before he eventually diverted his full attention to you. 

“Remember when we got separated back in high school? During our graduation day, you—”

“You left me behind, Juyeon.” 

“I didn’t have a choice back then, Y/N. But now I’m here to tell you everything. You have no idea how our stomach dropped when my father came home and told us that his company was about to go bankrupt, and we were on the verge of losing everything.” 

So that was what happened.

“And how it was also the day my mother found out that she had cancer and her chances of recovery were lower than expected.” 

“J-Juyeon…w-why didn’t you tell me all of this?” 

“I wanted to. I really wanted to so badly, Y/N. Because you’re my best friend, and you deserve to know everything. But I just didn’t know how to, and I was afraid of what might happen, and I don’t want to put the pressure on you.” 

“W-Where are they now, then?” 

Juyeon had to take in a big breath before choosing his following words wisely, knowing it must’ve been hard to even talk about it publicly. “Mom became bedridden, and she’s still receiving treatment in one of the hospitals back in the States. Dad is currently running a small little shop near the hospital along with my little brother.” 

“Then, why did you come back here?” 

“I came back because starting a proper company there was tough. I figured there might be a slight chance things could work out here in Seoul. With the remaining funds we had, I eventually begged my dad to give his final trust in me as I found a way to make things work out. Luckily, we had some acquaintances back here, and they helped me get into one of the prestigious universities and eventually landed me a job here at GQ Korea. I started as a normal employee before I eventually became their CEO a year prior.” 

It was then you noticed a single teardrop on the verge of dripping down his face from the corners of his eyes. Naturally and unbeknownst to you, your hand reached for the tissues placed neatly on the table, and you leaned in to wipe away that single teardrop. 

Only then did you both realise what you were doing, and that was when your eyes widened, and you were about to prop down back to your seat.

That was until Juyeon grabbed your wrist, not wanting to let you go. 

“This teardrop is nothing, Y/N. I’m so sorry you have to see this side of me. It’s not very cool, I guess,” he chuckled, trying his best to lighten up the mood a bit. 

As soon as he says those words, your other free hand eventually finds itself on Juyeon’s shoulders, causing the male’s eyes to widen this time before you finally speak out the words that you have always wanted to tell straight to his face all those years ago. 

“Juyeon, you need to start learning to put yourself before others. And I really mean it.” 

“Y/N, I—”

“No buts. Even after all these years, you’re still the same as before, always prioritising others before your own. As much as you are the most kind-hearted soul I’ve ever seen, you need to start loving and giving yourself some credit,” you replied, adding a little pressure onto your grip on his shoulders. 

With that, none of you said a word for a good couple of seconds, and you both just spent the entire time staring into each other's eyes as if you were conveying your messages non-verbally. That was until Juyeon finally decided to break the tension off by smiling at you, a genuine one you had consistently grown to love back then. 

“So, am I back in your good graces now, princess?” 

You were finally brought back to your senses, and you quickly removed both hands from him and sat down swiftly back on your chair, ducking your head down while giving a slight pout. 

Juyeon missed this sight of you and was absolutely admiring the whole situation that unfolded before him. Just then, both of your meals arrived, and the same waitress from before gently placed each of your respective ones in front of you. Juyeon then gently placed the cutlery in front of you. 

“Dig in,” he mentioned before whipping out the napkin and placing it right on his lap, before going in with his cutlery to cut through his steak. 

In return, you swiftly picked up yours and roughly cut through your freshly cooked breaded cod fish. 

“No one calls a normal friend princess, Lee freaking Juyeon,” you mumbled.

Just when you thought that would be the only time you would actually spend some time alone with Juyeon, it turns out the male had perceived that you both were back just the way you were when you were kids. 

Since that day, Juyeon would actually make his way out to invite you often to join lunch with him at the same cafe, usually ordering a different dish from the wide selection of food on the menu. What Juyeon loved the most about the place was the ambience and good coffee, and he would always be seen ordering a big jumbo-sized cup of iced latte to bring back to his office to help get through the rest of the day. 

You, on the other hand, were often stuck with more or less the same few dishes that you’ve tried, and you, too, would order your usual iced americano back to the office once you both were done with the meal. 

At first, you have always tried your best to avoid having contact with him; that first lunch date was just a typical day, as you would try to convince yourself. But whenever Juyeon gets a little break out from the office, he would either send you a personal email or sometimes ask his personal assistant to come down to your department to inform you to wait for the man down at the lobby at noon. 

You obviously could do your very best to come up with excuses to let him know that you’re busy with something or you already have plans to eat with your co-workers, but it seemed that the heart does what it wants, and it does not align with the signals that your brain is trying to tell you; which is to avoid and cut off this whole friendship for good. 

So you were back to being the giddy seventeen-year-old little girl who often felt excited whenever you spent time with your childhood friend. Hence, every time you were taking the very last escalator down to the lobby, you would often use that little time to admire the way Juyeon would always lean against one of the pillars while swiping through his phone with one hand and keeping the other one inside the pocket of his coat. 

But you did not want to admit it just yet, so you would constantly remind yourself that he’s only back for a while; it wouldn’t be so easy to open up your ice-cold heart again. 

That was until today. 

Just a few days prior, Juyeon had given you a ticket to visit this huge Christmas market in the town centre. At first, you stared at the paper blankly, thinking it was all a joke and he couldn’t have gone with you. But the male made it clear that he invited you to come along, which would be the two of you together. 

Your heart was bouncing so fast that you were afraid it would eventually pop out of your chest as you slowly approached where you both were supposed to meet. You figured it best that you arrived twenty minutes earlier to compose yourself and try to understand your situation. 

As you paced back and forth for god knows how long, you finally heard your name being called out from the far distance, and you perked your head up to see that Juyeon was waving his hands and running towards you like he used to back when he was a kid. 

Once he finally stopped right in front of you, he began panting heavily to the point you were genuinely worried if this man was actually alright. 

“Woah, what the hell happened to you? You seemed like you were escaping from a monster or something,” you joked. 

“N-No…I went to get this for you…” Juyeon then hands you a brown paper bag, and you accept it while being all confused. 

“Open it, Y/N. Have a look at what’s inside,” he insisted before resting both hands on his hips. 

While giving Juyeon a weird look, you finally peeped into the bag and extended your arm into the brown bag before you finally felt something soft against your palms and eventually pulled whatever it was out. 

Your eyes widened when you saw what it was. 

“J-Juyeon…this…”

“Remember way back in high school; we promised each other that we would want to visit the Christmas markets, and how badly did you want this soft alpaca plushie that was way too expensive for neither of us to get our hands on? Yeah, I actually got it before the store closed like minutes ago.” 

He remembered. 

You have always been vocal about wanting this plushie for years, and there was no way your parents were buying it for you, claiming that it was way too expensive (which it was since it was part of a collaboration with one of the high-end fashion companies) and that you wouldn’t have a proper use for it. Back then, Juyeon couldn’t do anything but reassure you that one day, your wish would definitely come true while always giving you pinky promises. 

And now, you were finally receiving your biggest Christmas wishlist item as an adult, and you couldn’t be much happier. 

You laughed. “Juyeon, you do realise that I’m not a child anymore, right?” 

“Who says plushies are only meant for young children? Why can’t adults have their collection? I’ll tell you I have a Build-A-Bear in my bedroom.” 

“You must be joking.” 

“Mark my words, Y/N.” 

Eventually, you both started laughing out loud before you hugged the plushie close to you, activating the heating function in the toy to keep yourself warm; that was the main purpose that made you want to purchase this product long ago. 

“Thank you, Juyeon.” 

“Well, instead of thanking me, why don’t you keep me company for the night as we explore this Christmas market together?” 

You smiled. “With pleasure.”

“Oh, Juyeon~ Have I ever told you how much I’ve admired your good looks? I’d like to think that your family genes are something else.”

After an hour or two of walking through the entire Christmas market and having too much fun going to each stall and trying out the different activities and food, you eventually stumbled upon one located towards the furthest end and sold various eggnog drinks. You have never tried this particular alcoholic beverage before; you were mostly used to the beers that you often get back in the pubs in London. However, Juyeon insisted that you give it a go especially for the Christmas season, and he eventually bought both of you a mug. 

The initial taste seemed a bit off to you, but once the alcohol started kicking in, you eventually began to chug the whole liquid down as if it were nobody’s business. After some time, one mug of eggnog began turning into two, and then three, and finally, you were pretty sure that you were on your fifth mug by now. 

That was when Juyeon realised that he should’ve stopped you by your second or third mug because now you were barely walking properly without his aid, and your speech began to slur as he linked your arms over his shoulders, trying his best to support you while walking you back home. 

You both had to take the subway trains to head back to your apartment and during the entire time, you were clingy with your childhood friend, often wrapping your arms around him and giving him a tight squeeze while mumbling incoherent words. You caught the attention of all passengers and passersby, but Juyeon could only smile at how you looked right now. 

He had never seen you drunk before, and this was a whole new experience for him. But he wasn’t too mad that you reminded him so much of your younger self; it was as if he was witnessing the seven-year-old you again in the present day. 

After walking from the subway and, eventually, towards your front door to your apartment, Juyeon was about to take you up towards the elevator until you stopped him in his tracks.

“No Juyeon~ why are you leaving me so early? We still have so much more to see in the market!” 

He smiled. “Y/N, I think it’s time for you to head home to get some rest.” 

“But I don’t wanna~” 

With that, Juyeon grabbed hold of both your shoulders as he bent down to be on the same eye level as you, trying his best to talk to you in your drunken stage. 

“Y/N, I’ll see you tomorrow, hmm? We’ve had loads of fun today, and besides, your mom and sister would be worried sick about you at this late hour.” 

Immediately, you lifted your pinky at him, which caused the male to stare at you blankly. “Pinky promise that I get to see you tomorrow, Juyeon-ie?” 

Oh, how insanely adorable you were to Juyeon right now. 

He chuckled before linking his pinky with yours, shaking it left and right slightly as if to seal the agreement. “I promise, we’ll see each other in the office first thing tomorrow morning.”

With the final pinky shake, Juyeon guided you towards the elevator and pressed the button. As you both waited for the elevator to come down to the ground floor, you suddenly broke off the silence, and Juyeon had to blink twice to know he wasn’t hearing things wrong. 

“I’ve always liked you Juyeon…even after all these years…I never stopped loving you…” you sobbed. 

Your nose was now sniffling, and you closed your eyes to let the tears drip down, not caring what Juyeon would think about all this. You were done trying to hold it back for so long, and you needed to let the burden that you’ve held onto for years finally let loose, and well, you were drunk at this point, so you couldn’t really control the words that slipped out from your mouth. 

“Why did you leave me just like that…did you know how much pain it has caused…and how hard I’ve tried to forget every single thing about you? I even threw away all of the pictures and toys we’d had together because the flashbacks of memories would often play in my mind upon seeing them,” you were now crying, and you began to raise your voice a little. 

“Why, Juyeon, WHY!!” You screamed at the top of your lungs, and immediately you burst out crying, plopping straight down onto the concrete floor. You hated how the alcohol wasn’t making you think straight and that you were feeling a roller coaster of emotions right now. 

Just let it out, Y/N. You’ve suffered long enough—

Immediately, a warm pair of arms wrapped around you, and a hand gently pushed your head down to let you rest on the crook of their neck. You finally glanced up to see that it was Juyeon, holding you tight and resting his chin on the top of your head. 

As much as you want to push yourself away from him, you can’t. You couldn’t explain why, and you have even made a pact to yourself that you wouldn’t want anything associated with him anymore. 

But why did the saying the heart wants what it wants have to be so accurate? 

You hated it, hated how you have always let your emotions take full control over your mind, not making you think straight, and often going against your plans. In fact, your heart ached so badly, and it was the same feeling that you felt seven years ago, right when Juyeon left you alone as he hopped onto his vehicle. 

The only thing you could do right now was to let the stream of tears pour down and cry out to your heart’s content. You felt weak, and you could do nothing to push him away. 

Juyeon couldn’t blame you, though, because how could he? Especially when he was the one who said nothing all those years ago. Now, he was seeing with his own eyes how much pain and trouble it has cost you, turning you into a vulnerable little petite girl who was crying her heart out in his arms. 

With that, he moved his lips down to plant a little kiss on your head and eventually closed his eyes as your cries filled up his eyedrums. 

“I’ll make it work, Y/N. I promise you that I’ll make things work this time.”

“Oh, good fucking hell.” 

You were sitting on your work desk, bringing your hands to cover up your face. It was an absolute nightmare to hear from your sister about what happened the night before—how you got drunk and caused a little scene in public, which made everyone turn their attention towards you, how Juyeon was the one who brought you all the way back home, how you had a breakdown in front of him to the point you eventually fell asleep after crying your eyes out to the point he had to physically gave you a piggyback up to your front door and assisted your sister to plop you down on your bed. 

If there was a nearby cliff near your workplace, you would do anything to ditch work and actually head straight up there to jump off from the embarrassment. 

You were already not having a good time reuniting with Juyeon, let alone trying to sort your emotions out while seeing him at work every day and that he was your boss. But to confess your deepest thoughts while being vulnerable and drunk in front of him? That was not written anywhere in your books. 

As you were spending your entire lunch break groaning over what happened last night, you immediately received a call from your desk telephone, and you quickly composed yourself before picking the phone up. 

“Y-Yes, hello? This is L/N from the editorial department; how may I assist you for the day?”

“Good afternoon, Miss L/N. Please report to the CEO’s office immediately whenever you can.” 

Oh, Jesus take the wheel. 

The entire walk up to the CEO’s office was nerve-wracking; it was as if you were being sent to detention at the principal’s office because you messed up really badly. So many thoughts ran through your mind, thinking about how to apologise to Juyeon for the scene you had caused the day prior.

Once you walked into his office, you tried your best to devise the best phrase to start the conversation, but it seemed that Juyeon beat you to it, immediately handing you a red ginseng hangover drink. 

You reluctantly accepted it while mumbling a soft ‘thank you’ before he insisted that you drink it immediately before him. Once you were done, he took the bottle away and tossed it straight into the bin, directly briefing you about the upcoming fashion show, now only a month away. 

Now that it was back to business and you were no longer childhood friends, you tried your best to keep your composure as you listened to all of the details he was going through one by one with you. 

Eventually, he decided to bring you along to meet up with one of the CEOs of the high-end brands on a trip to Seoul to discuss the plan in person further. Apparently, you have met with the CEO of Fendi, and it’s one of the brands that have been associated with GQ Korea for decades now. Somehow, Juyeon has gotten pretty close with the famous man himself over the years.

All of you met up in the famous Four Seasons Hotel for a pretty luxurious high-tea session while discussing the whole fashion show. It was mostly just Juyeon conversing with the CEO himself; you were mainly there to take down all the essential notes that both parties spoke.

Usually, it would have been his personal assistant job, but he insisted that you come along this time, saying it was part of your training. To be completely honest, you weren’t sure if Juyeon was the one mixing up between work and personal life issues at this point. All you wanted to do was to pray that this meeting gets over and done with quickly so that you could head back towards the comforts of your cubicle in the office and not face Juyeon for a while.

After an hour or so, it seemed as if the meeting was wrapped, and both parties finally parted ways for now, causing you to head straight back to Juyeon’s vehicle. Many people would think most CEOs would have their chauffeur, but Juyeon insisted that he always preferred to drive alone. 

He was still the chatterbox that you have always remembered back in the day, how we would often come up with any possible topic that would keep you entertained; you both could talk for days back then only if both of your families didn’t stop you from heading back home for meal time. 

There was only one problem this time: you were still troubled by what had happened the day before, and it was hard enough to even join Juyeon for this meeting with the CEO of Fendi in the first place. Now that both of you were alone in the car, things were far more awkward than they already were. Juyeon never touched on the topic from last night, but still, you couldn’t bring yourself to look at him in the face. 

Just when you thought Juyeon was about to take the left turn to head back towards the office, he took the other lane instead and drove towards the opposite direction.

“Juyeon, the office is the other way—”

“Let’s go somewhere, Y/N. Treat this as a little gift of stepping out of office hours for a bit. You’ll still get paid, though; don’t worry. I’ll make sure to inform your head department about your absence.” 

What on earth is going through your mind, Juyeon?

It has been a few minutes since you have physically pressed yourself against the tank, slowly admiring various species swimming about minding their own business. 

Apparently, you both have arrived at the COEX Aquarium, known for homing a large variety of rare species of aquatic animals and typically the best place for school trips, holidays, and even as a date.

Wait, scratch that last one—

“Didn’t you always say how coming here has been on your bucket list for the longest time?” Juyeon questioned you as he slowly walked up towards where you were from behind, slipping both of his hands into his cloak as he, too, began admiring the beauty in front of him. 

That was when you finally diverted your attention to his face for the first time since hopping into his car this morning to head to the hotel. You were upset at yourself with how the feelings were the same as before: his pretty sculpted facial features, how good-looking he actually was, and how he could do the bare minimum, yet you would still swoon over the man himself. 

With all that has happened lately, something told you this was more than friend behaviour. Sure, Juyeon might be trying his best to patch up this whole relationship you once had, taking you to places and recreating new memories with one another, but you weren’t sure if Juyeon felt the same way as you did. 

That deep feeling within the pit of your stomach made you feel uncomfortable, and it was about time you finally confronted him about the one question that had pondered at the back of your mind for the longest time. 

If both of you wanted to continue whatever was happening between you, you needed to get the specific answer first. 

And it has to be now. 

“Juyeon, can I ask you something?” 

He hummed. “Yeah, go ahead.” 

With that, you turned your entire body facing him and took a deep breath to figure out the right words to convey your feelings for the man himself. “I meant what I said the night before.” 

That alone was enough to get his full attention, as he was now slowly turning himself fully towards you as if he was staring straight into your soul. You wanted to chicken out so badly and tell him it was nothing, and you both could just continue with the silence. But you have already come so far, and you know that this will only continue to haunt you for as long as you live if you aren’t going to address it now. 

So you mustered up every bit of courage left within you, and opened your mouth again. 

“I never stopped loving you, Juyeon. Even though we have lost contact for so many years, I never once stop thinking about you every single day. As much as I’ve tried so hard to forget about you, hell, I threw everything that reminded me of you into the dumpster or boxes and kept them deep somewhere where I wouldn’t even think about searching for it ever again, but to no avail.” 

Your body began to tremble as you tried to calm yourself down by playing with your fingers. “I couldn’t, Juyeon. Every time I thought I have succeeded in getting rid of you from my life for good, the thought of you just somehow finds its way to creep back up in my mind.” 

“I have no idea if karma sent me back here to Seoul, especially when my career was doing well in London. Imagine coming back and discovering that my new employer is someone I’ve tried so hard to forget about? The mixed emotions I felt then were insufferable.” 

As you began to speak more, tears started welling up in your eyes, causing your heartbeat to rise rapidly. But you decided to press on and choke back on your tears. 

“With all that you have done for me for the past weeks and months, I truly have no idea what on earth you are trying to prove to me, Lee Juyeon. Are you trying to fix our broken friendship? Or is it something more? What exactly are you even planning to do, Juyeon?” 

Finally, you took a few steps closer until you were inches away from him. 

“Be honest with me now, Juyeon. What exactly am I to you?” 

There was this tense moment between you two, and neither of you said a word to one another. You were looking straight at your childhood friend with red, puffy eyes, and his eyes were widened, looking at you and trying his best to take in everything you’d said. 

Something tells you that it was best not to hear about Juyeon’s opinions at all for the fear of rejection once more. If you had the power to dissect his mind to determine his thoughts and feelings about all of this, you would. Yet, you were still afraid of what might happen next. 

As you wait for his response, you slowly examine how his shoulders began to slump, and eventually he tries his best to talk some sense into you. 

“Y/N, I—”

“Ah! It’s Juyeon-ie!” 

The both of you immediately darted your head towards where the voice was coming from, and that was when you noticed a female running towards Juyeon while waving her hands, and a rather old man accompanied her. 

Who could it be? 

“Saeran? And Uncle Lee? What are you two doing here?” Juyeon questioned as the two individuals made their way towards you. It was also then they both noticed your presence and the soft-spoken young lady was the one who broke the ice. 

“You must be?” 

“O-Oh, I umm—”

“She’s Y/N; she used to be my neighbour back in the days when I was still living in Seoul.” 

Just a neighbour, huh? 

“Ah, Y/N!” The young female extended her hand for a little handshake, in which you awkwardly return the favour. “It’s a pleasure to meet you in person finally! Juyeon has spoken a lot about you.” 

Before you could even give a reply, it seemed that the older man whom you now know was his uncle, or rather, perceived that he was the one who managed to help Juyeon get a new start in life back here in Seoul, finally spoke and diverted Juyeon’s attention back to what they were here for in the first place. 

“We had made a little appointment this afternoon, don’t you remember, Juyeon?”

“Oh, yes! I’m so sorry. It must’ve completely slipped my mind since I have been pretty caught up with work lately,” Juyeon apologised while slightly bowing towards his uncle. 

“Not at all, Juyeon. I’m sure you must’ve been pretty busy with-” his uncle then diverts his attention towards you. “-a lot of things.” 

You definitely felt way too uncomfortable at the moment, and you needed to get out of the aquarium right this second if you did not wish to be suffocated by all of the tension in the air. 

Immediately, you gently removed your hands from the young female and quickly made a ninety-degree bow towards all of them.

“My humble apologies, it seems that I have disrupted an important meeting. I shall take my leave now.” 

As soon as you turned your heel towards the other direction, you suddenly felt a pair of hands grab your wrist, stopping you in your tracks. 

“Y/N! Wait, I’ll drive you back—”

“No, it’s fine,” you tried your best to smile at him. “I’ll just take the train located right outside the aquarium. Have a good day.” 

You instantly slip your hands off his grip and dash straight towards the front door, trying your best not to look back and ignore the tears dripping down your face as you walk down the steps towards the subway.

It was now week two of cutting off all contact with Juyeon. It hadn’t been easy for you both at work and personally. In fact, you haven’t been doing great at all. It was as if you had turned into a living zombie, often feeling rather emotionless and drowning yourself in paperwork and avoiding contact with another except for your head of department. 

Since Juyeon was still your employer and CEO, he has definitely tried all means of contacting you, asking to see if you were doing okay or trying to get you up to his office to talk about the fashion show, or rather, to talk things out. But every single time, you would find ways to decline his request as best as possible while respecting him as your boss first and foremost. 

After a week of declining his invitations, his messages and calls eventually stopped coming a week ago; it was as if he had completely vanished for a little while. From what you have heard, it seemed that he had some urgent matters that he had to deal with, causing him to leave the office into the hands of his assistant for now.

It was finally a little breather for you since you didn’t have to put on this facade for the time being, letting you let loose for a bit. Going through sleepless nights throughout the past couple of weeks definitely has taken a toll on your mental well-being. 

You told yourself you needed to hold it all in for another week. Once this whole fashion show is done, you will get your well-deserved vacation off work for one week. 

It’ll be alright. Things will definitely work out in one way or another, Y/N.

It was finally the day for the long-awaited fashion show hosted by GQ Korea and the collaboration among famous brands around the globe. A swarm of people marched into the rented convention hall, filling the entire space within minutes.

You and your co-workers were busy getting everything organised and ensuring everything was in place. Since you were in the editorial department, you have been going about talking to all of the big figureheads from each respective brand, mostly just breaking the ice as well as interviewing them so that you have your necessary notes to draft out the proposal for the upcoming magazine. 

Time passed quickly and it was time for the show to begin. As you sat down on one of the chairs, you made your way towards the far end corners of the hall, getting ready your notepad and trusty blue ballpoint pen. 

As the light began to dim, Juyeon eventually made his way up on stage with a microphone, giving the guests a warm welcome and a little opening speech before the models began their runway walk. Seeing the man himself again was a bittersweet moment for you. As much as you wanted nothing more associated with him, your eyes just couldn’t seem to turn away from him.

It did not help that he was dressed up in a black tuxedo, with his hair styled up with his usual one strand on his forehead. He looked strikingly handsome, and you wouldn’t be surprised if he managed to woo almost everyone in the audience tonight. The way he presented himself was truly magnificent, and you could see why he was able to rise to the ranks of being a CEO at such a young age. 

Tears began welling up in your eyes again, but you tried your very best to hold them back and mentally cursed at yourself, thinking that this was all professional work now and that there was no room for any personal matters for the night. 

Once he made his desired speech, he eventually came down from the stage and sat at one of the front row seats, and that was where you could clearly see that the very same girl from the aquarium sat right next to him, along with his uncle and personal assistant. It shouldn’t bother you since they are practically family to him. It was none of your business, so why couldn’t you take your eyes off them?

Or rather, with him and the young lady who was clearly having fun whispering into each other’s ears. 

It has nothing to do with me. 

You constantly reminded yourself that whenever you tried to spare a glance at them, all while you were taking down notes from the show. It was definitely a challenge trying to stay focused, and there were a couple of times when you needed to close your eyes for a bit and take a few deep breaths to proceed with your work. 

The show finished smoothly, and the audience responded with a standing ovation. You definitely felt a sense of accomplishment from that, too, given that all of your hard work over the past months had finally paid off. 

The event wouldn’t have been complete without an after-party, so here you were in the hall next door—with all of the guests, models, and even staff alike having loads of fun chatting about with a glass of champagne in hand. Eventually, the DJ that was hired began to blast out a wide selection of music, indicating that whoever felt comfortable hitting up the dance floor was able to do so. 

You smiled as you saw a couple of your close co-workers pull up some moves on the dance floor; it reminded you of loads of your time back in the UK—going to the local pubs and just having the time of your life drinking and partying with your friends. 

Just as you were lost in thought, you suddenly felt a little tap on your shoulder, and you turned around to see that Juyeon’s assistant insisted that someone wanted to see you in person. 

You didn’t think much of it since you already had a little bit of alcohol in your system, so when you finally realised who was the one who wanted to see you, panic began to rush through your veins, and you tried your best to make sense of the situation. 

“Mr Lee? Is something the matter?”

You did not need to see the older male again, especially when he gave you a not-so-good first impression back at the aquarium. However, you had no reason to devise an excuse to leave; he was much superior to you anyway. 

“Why, good evening, Miss L/N. I hope you are enjoying the party so far, and congratulations on the job well done. I must say Juyeon always excels in his work, no matter what obstacles he encounters along the way.” 

The only thing you could do was flash a little smile back at him, as much as it made you uncomfortable. In the back of your mind, you have dozens of questions running through your mind, thinking about in what manner his uncle has any business with you. 

Eventually, he began speaking as if he was chanting through a book, giving you a whole load of information that was a little bit too much to take in at the moment. 

“It seems that Seoul life has been too tedious for you, don’t you think? Have you ever wondered about transferring back to London? Perhaps it would be a much better place for you to reside in.” 

“Umm, with all due respect, sir, how did you know about my background—”

“Oh, I have always kept an eye on you; you were Juyeon’s childhood friend, after all.” 

Keyword. “Were” 

“With that being said, I have read a couple of your articles before from the London Mail, and I must say, they are actually quite extraordinary.” 

“W-Why, t-thank you, Mr Lee. I really do appreciate them—”

“Speaking of transferring, the CEO for Fendi has actually taken quite a liking to you and your work. Even throughout the whole fashion show back there, he has been talking on and on about you, saying how you would prove to be a fruitful addition to his company.”

Just like that, Mr Lee began to step forward to hand you a little sticky note, which clearly had a number written on it. 

“If you ever change your mind, give me a call. Besides, I’m sure you already know the answer deep within your heart. I will be waiting,” Mr Lee responded with a smug before entering back into the hall. 

You stared back down at the note and eventually began thinking about what his uncle said prior. Suddenly, you started feeling conflicted, thinking this was the right place to belong. But it could also be his way of trying to brainwash you; you’re pretty sure you felt like a menace in his eyes. 

You decided you needed some fresh air to clear your thoughts for a bit, so you headed out towards the balcony right up the stairs. You figured that an open-air rooftop seemed perfect for some alone time. 

If only you were the only one who was planning to use the same exact spot that is.

Right when you reached the door that was ajar on the rooftop, you immediately recognised the two people standing before you, the female leaning in to give your childhood friend a peck on the lips.

You stand there motionless, and immediately, your blood starts to boil, something you haven’t felt in a while. The glass of champagne then drops towards the ground, and the shattered noises make the two turn their attention towards you. 

It all felt like a sudden pause like time had stopped for a few moments. The both of you were staring deep into each other’s eyes, not knowing what to do or how to respond. But then, Juyeon eventually spoke to break the silence. 

Before you could ever hear what he had to say, you were already dashing down the stairs, not caring that you had missed a couple of steps and that there were a few instances where you felt like you were about to trip and fall straight down back where you came from. 

Not even wanting to let your co-workers know about anything, you quickly dashed through the front gates, running through the now gloomy skies that were bound to have a heavy downpour within a few minutes. 

You should’ve remembered that Juyeon was the basketball team leader back in high school for a reason; no matter how fast you ran through the streets, he eventually caught you and yanked you back towards him, causing you to press up against his chest. 

“Let me go! Let me go—”

“Y/N! Please! Let us just talk things out.” 

You used up all of your strength and pushed him away as hard as you could before you began raising your voice back at him. “Talk? Don’t be ridiculous. You have done more than enough, and I have seen enough.” 

“Y/N, no. You don’t understand—”

“What else do I have to understand!?!? You have done more than enough to shatter me over and over again, Juyeon! And to think I was dumb enough actually to think we could work things out again!” You screamed. 

“Y/N…please…just calm down and listen to what I have to say…” Juyeon was now practically begging you, begging you just to stop. 

“You clearly don’t understand the pain that I’ve gone through, Juyeon. You weren’t there to witness or experience it anyway! Why did we even become friends in the first place, huh!?!?” 

God, cat’s out of the bag. 

That last sentence was definitely not meant to be said at all; it was one of your deepest, darkest thoughts that you have sworn that nobody should ever find out about, especially when it is directed towards the person who stood before you.

“I hate you, Juyeon…I really do…for all of the pain that you have caused me…” you were now sobbing like a child, which pained Juyeon so much seeing how you were now. 

With that, a loud thunder resonated throughout the city, and a heavy downpour began pouring down from the skies. The both of you were now soaked, and you mustered up the courage to say your final words to him as the tears began mixing with the rain. 

“Please…I beg of you…just stop looking for me…or even talk to me at all…just leave me alone…that’s the last thing I will ask of you…” 

“I don’t want anything to do with you no more.” 

You slowly began backing away, and when you reached a good amount of distance, you turned your heel and began running away into the shadows, not sparing a final glance at your childhood friend who stood at the same spot under the pouring rain. 

This is my final goodbye, Juyeon.

If you thought the whole week of you being a walking zombie in the office was terrible enough, clearly, nobody was prepared for the current state that you were in. You locked yourself up in your room and refused to see anybody, even your mother and sister. 

You would constantly lay in bed, tossing and turning, even though it was hard to fall asleep. Since you avoided contact with your family members, there was nothing much they could do but place a tray filled with your meals and dishes in front of your door, waiting for you to eventually open up during times when you actually felt hungry and took them into your room to savour them all on your own. 

You didn’t need anyone or anything now; you craved alone time and peace. 

As you curl up in bed, sometimes even at the corners of your room, your eyes would often dart towards the sticky note handed to you by his uncle. So many times you have thought about it: what if life would’ve been better abroad and coming back to Seoul was truly a grave mistake that you have made? What if this whole decision was actually an awakening moment for you to realise that this is not where you should belong? 

Days went back and eventually, it became a week. There were only a few days left before you returned to the office for work. The longer you kept staring at the note, the more motivated you were to take the risk and start again. 

Every time you were reminded of what happened that very fateful night, you rationalised that maybe what Mr Lee said was true after all. Perhaps Seoul is really not your place to belong. 

As the clock ticked, your desire to leave everything behind felt stronger. 

You waited until the clock finally struck noon for you to finally stand up with your phone in hand, punching each number into the dial pad and bringing it to your ear. 

Once the ringing eventually got through and you were met with a voice on the other end of the line, you took a deep breath before muttering the words you have been reluctant about all this while. 

“I’ll take up the offer.”

“For the very last time sissy, I promise I will be fine,” you spoke through your headphones as you were on a video call with your sister, who was back home at your apartment. 

“You have never done something so impulsive before, and given that you made this whole decision during your darkest hours? I highly doubt that you’re okay, Miss Y/N.” 

“Well, I can assure you that the darkest hours are gone, and I’m now free and much happier. I can work with Fendi!” 

Your sister sighed through the phone. “Working with big brands is one thing; what about your physical and mental well-being?” 

“Rome doesn’t sound too bad to me, and besides, living in the UK for a couple of years has definitely given me the experience I’ve needed to survive back in the EU again.” 

“Fine. Just…be careful, okay? Give mom and I a call once you’ve touched down.” 

You gave a little flying kiss through the phone. “Don’t worry, I will.” 

After waving goodbye on both sides, you clicked the red end call button and leaned back onto the chair you had been sitting on for the past hour. It was definitely a shocker to you that Fendi was willing to accept you immediately without having to go through any sort of significant interviews and that they were kind enough to even provide accommodations for you. At the same time, you work for them under a contract of two years. Frankly, it was a good deal and a steal. 

You slowly stare into the digital clock on the big screen, which eventually becomes an announcement. 

“All passengers bound for Rome, Italy, please head to gate 4B and be ready for boarding!” 

Instantly, almost all of the people around you began standing and lining up as if they needed to be the first to get on board. You have always disliked and never understood why the rush and pushing against one another trying to fight for the first slot, so you often just sat back and relaxed until only a couple of folks left to board the plane. 

Time went by quickly, and thirty minutes have passed since then. Now, only a handful of passengers are left to board. That was when it was your cue to get up and sling your backpack onto your back. 

As you slowly walked towards the counter to let the flight attendants scan your passport and let you through the gates, you felt a sudden tap on your shoulders, causing you to turn behind to see who it was. 

You didn’t have much time to respond until you were pulled in for a tight embrace; that familiar cologne was enough to make the tears well up in your eyes again.

“J-Juyeon…” your voice muffled. 

“Stop. Let me just…let me do the talking this time. Please.” 

You would have definitely fought back and started pushing him away once more, but it seems that you were either too taken aback or lost all of the energy throughout the past week to do so. Instead, you just stood there motionless in his arms. 

“Y/N, I know it would be horrible for me to ask for forgiveness because I definitely do not deserve any of that after what I have put you through. Or even for another chance because you clearly gave me one, and it was my fault for not appreciating nor cherishing the moment when it happened,” he began stroking your head, his fingers running through your long, silky, soft hair. 

“But one thing is for sure: I will not let you go this time. This time, I am going to hold you so tight that there’s no room for you to escape; I’ll make sure that you will forever be safe and sound in my arms, and I will be the one who is going to bring you joy instead of pain and tears.” 

He then bends down to give you a little kiss on your forehead. “You mean a lot to me, Y/N. And I’d like to think you are more than just a friend; you’re my other half. Without you, I wouldn’t be able to move on, knowing that I will lose you again, and this time, forever, if I don’t stop you now.” 

“So please, Y/N. I’m begging you. Please don’t go.” 

With his final words, you eventually find your arms slowly snaking up his back and returning the hug to him. You weren’t too sure why you did that, especially after the tremendous pain you have gone through the past week in particular. At the end of the day, the phrase where the heart wants what it wants will forever remain faithful to you, whether you like it or not. 

You sobbed. “You’re not going to make me stay that easily.”

“Oh yeah? You think I’m not capable of doing that?”

“Prove it then.” 

Instantly, one of his hands travelled back up to your chin and lifted them, causing you to look directly towards his as he slowly bent down to interlock his lips with yours. The kiss was rather heated, as if the both of you had been waiting for this to come so badly. You couldn’t care less if you both were actually making out at the airport.

Juyeon cupped your face with both hands as he tilted his head for you to gain more entrance into his. His lips felt soft yet demanding as if you were devouring a forbidden fruit. In return, you run your fingers through his silky black hair. 

After a few minutes, you both broke apart for some fresh air, trying your best to catch your breath simultaneously. 

“Is that supposed to make me stay put in Seoul, Juyeon?” You teased. 

With that, he merely replied with a little smile followed by a smirk. “That, Miss Y/N, was actually a pact you made to me. Treat it as a contract, if you will, that you are bound to stay by my side no matter what.” 

“Ugh, that’s so foul of you!” 

“You should know that I have my ways; I’m not the CEO of GQ Korea for nothing.” 

The both of you eventually burst out into laughter while Juyeon finds both hands on your waist while you wrap your arms around his shoulders. 

“Listen, Y/N. I want to apologise on behalf of my uncle and Saeran.” 

“Oh, yeah. No big deal. By the way, is Saeran—”

“It’s not what you think it is.” 

“It’s not?”

He smiled. “She’s my little cousin, and she often showers me with tons of hugs and kisses, even though I’ve told her to stop a million times.” 

“Well, you’re lucky to have a cousin who loves you that much,” you replied. 

“Yeah, but she’s going to have to learn that she can’t do that anymore because someone else is going to replace her job for that.” 

As much as you knew who he referred to, you still wanted to drag this further. “And who exactly is that?” 

“Hmm…maybe the contract before wasn’t clear enough. Should I make another one?”

You slapped his chest immediately. “Don’t you dare, we’re in public.” 

Again, another burst of laughter was genuinely beginning to make you feel a lot better, even to the point of slowly healing all the scars you have had before. 

With that, you needed to make yourself clear to the man himself. 

“Juyeon, can I just be honest with you?”

“Of course, sweetheart.” 

“I appreciate you doing all of this for me, but I just want to give you a heads-up that it’ll take a while for me to heal from everything completely and that I’m sorry if I don’t give you the exact treatment that you expect from me, and I—”

You were then silenced with another kiss on the lips; this time, Juyeon took the time to shower you with as many kisses as possible, making sure that each was worthwhile before breaking the kiss again. 

“Y/N, I don’t care about all of that. You can take as long as you need, but just know that I will be here for each step you take, and I’ll give you support whenever you need it. I promise. I will not leave you behind ever again.” 

As you both plastered a soft smile, you leaned in to rest your forehead against each other, taking in everything that had happened minutes prior.

“Here’s to a new beginning with you.”

masterlist

taglist: @deoboyznet @kflixnet @k-films @flwoie @zzoguri @kyusqult @tinkerbell460 @cheonsafics @sulkygyu @jaerisdiction @lngwayup @daisyvisions (join my permanent taglist here!)

[littleroaes]

To All The Boys I’ve Loved Before, tbz

PAIRING ⏵ ( 2nd pov, you ) fem!reader x lee hyunjae, lee juyeon, ji changmin, kim sunwoo, eric sohn

at the last two weeks before the semester; your younger brother leaked your old love letters. when you return to university, you work as a part time assistant for the hockey team. the charming crush of your youth has read your letter and makes a deal to not spread it if in return, you'll be his fake girlfriend for the upcoming house party. that night sets off an event with all five letters.

GENRE ⏵ FLUFF, college!au / university!au, setting around 2013 ( 2010s!au ), 2000s!au ( childhood ), to all the boys i’ve loved before!au, summer!au, some angst since we do only have one end game, childhood friends2lovers, hockey player!hyunjae, playboy (with a soft side)!hyunjae, short fake dating!au side plot, boy next door!eric, frat!eric, rich kid!eric, flirty but shy!sunwoo, old summer love!sunwoo, reader is an medical assistant, lots of pining, mutual pining, cats!!!, nerdy oblivious juyeon, literature major!juyeon, history major!changmin, changmins bad at sports (sorry bub), 3 different types of parties!, a pool party, a house party, a beach party (i don’t even like parties irl!)

WARNINGS ⏵ reader is good at sports ( volleyball ), hyunjae is a little mean/ manipulative at the start, reader gets drunk twice, sunwoo once ( oufff ), swearing a few times ( fuck, shit ), some jealousy, bad dancing (specially from reader), reader's zodiac sign is a capricorn (for a joke), kissing, pet names ( angel, princess ), proofread once ( i feel like ive forgotten something but hope not😭 )

WORD COUNT ⏵ 19 k

playlist i listened to while writing

this is my fic for @deoboyznet the love letter collective event ! if you specifically want to know which members will have more romantic storylines and who reader will end up with; i have written it out at the end of the post! ( if it being your bias is important for reading ex ). though all five will have cute/ flirty moments with reader! i changed to 2nd person pov for no reason😭 i hope you don’t mind here’s a 500 word teaser before commitment ( it’s in 3rd pov for now! )

like and reblog are highly encouraged !

01 . CHAPTER ONE 

IMAGINE THIS; ONCE UPON A TIME, FATHER OF YOURS SAID THAT TO SCOUR THE EVIL THOUGHTS OCCUPYING YOUR YOUNG MIND, ONE ONLY HAS TO WRITE LETTERS. What a magical solution to all the finite problems of youth! That’s what you thought even as you started to come of age and the inevitable falls of love. Each time, when your innocence was consumed, little by little, by the harsh realities of romance; you spit it out on a piece of paper, enveloped it, stored it in a box (extra security measures) and sheltered underneath your bed. 

And now, you’re in university. Back home for the last two weeks before the autumn semester. Laying against the bed–it reeks of school mornings of 2005–and still holds those letters beneath. The pink hues on the pillows are still there, maybe a little washed out. All butterflies stickers from magazines are plastered on furniture that shines, just slightly, when the sun goes down underneath the neighboring roofs, lucent through the open windows. 

You’ve hung out with Eric, a childhood friend. Bicycled down the gravel paths fenced in lines through houses. Side by side, always trying to one up the other like you always did. Take a swim in the same lake, in the same spot those old pictures show. Like those days; the sun never falters until it all stands on the edge between diagonal roofs. 

And amidst your childhood lies your younger cousin. Bare arms touch each other as you lie side by side with feet over the pillows, and noses –the paper box of letters. She told you about a longing crush she has for a boy in the parallel class. When overconsumed by nostalgia; you couldn’t refrain from dusting off the old box. And that’s how you ended up back with the letters you swore to withhold. 

There are five of them. 

The first one is Lee Jaehyun, a three year older popular student who you had a trivial crush on in middle school ( together with everyone else). In all honesty you didn’t know much about him; just that he was cute looking. There’s a sort of emotional torment in recalling the one sided adoration while leaned out the school window to see him play football. Even his name haunts you still in uni as your roommate had a crush on the shining hockey player the entire two semesters.

In short, everyone liked Lee Jaehyun. 

Next is Eric Sohn, your childhood friend, the boy next door, even first love? He has many titles you realize. He lived in an impressive house north from here, one that hosts many parties every time his parents take the trip to their summer resort. At some point, it felt like he knew every kid in town. Luckily, you have never been the jealous type. Despite being each other’s ride or die since ten, you never confessed the secret ways you looked at him back in the sandbox.  

Third is Sunwoo–just Sunwoo; you never got his last name–from summer camp who you even ( jokingly ) got married to. Your first summer at thirteen, away from parents, with kids the same age. When recalling it all back, that summer feels as if taken out of a movie, and you fell head first, three meters deep with the boy. Sunwoo always stood in the center ( bad and good…mostly bad tbh ). You got paired up for the kayak; it pissed rained and your coordination couldn’t take you ten meters. But you remember every word he said as butterfly inducing nonetheless. After that, at night you snuck out of your cabins to watch the stars. And when that summer too ended, you swore your heart shattered into million pieces.

The fourth is Lee Juyeon, a boy you had never seen before until his cat got pregnant by yours. Scuba Steve ( long story ) had been gone for some days until another family came up to their door with him. For half a year, it felt like you saw Lee Juyeon everyday. He was just as enchanted by kittens as you ( if not more ) and you two would visit each other just to cuddle with them. The teenage heart used to rush with the mere presence of him and together you named all the kittens–until they were sold off. Then they eventually stopped seeing each other. Though he still lurks around as a poet’s ghost around campus ( source Eric ). 

The last one, Ji Changmin, the son of your mother’s friend. He teached you calculus for a while in high school. To be fully transparent, you didn’t learn much from him that year because all you did was leaning on the kitchen table while adoring him until the rims of his glasses slipped. He always scolded you endearingly when you didn’t listen ( which was the majority of the time ). Ji Changmin always wore cute polos with neat pants–now when thinking about it, mother might have approved if you got together. But it’s too late. He went to uni; and simply left you with a newfound thing for glasses ( still wearing cute polos in uni ). 

And that’s all. You sometimes wonder if it was a mere symptom of youth that resulted in those letters. Since uni–outside a campus crush or two-–that compelling yearning for someone has never come back. 

Eventually the bird’s cease to sing once the sun swallows entirely by the horizon, and cicadas can be heard through the open windows. You leave the letters as the two of you close the door. Mother asked if you and your cousin wanted to go with the rest of the adults down to the green field at the center of the neighborhood, you said yes. 

When the heavy door shuts against the frame, voices from your younger brother’s room at the highest floor seeps through the windows.

( next morning ) 

“Mom, you haven’t seen some letters?” You stand at the stairs to look down the kitchen counter where mother and your brother turn from the pantry light. 

“Three’s blue and two pink envelopes?” You ask again. 

Mom shakes her head, “No, I haven’t?” 

You sigh, sprint up the second floor. 

“Y/n?” 

Call of your name echoes through the frame into your room. To look over the bed and see your younger brother centered at the white rectangle. His fringe like curtains reluctant to open as he looks elsewhere. You come up completely. 

“What?” 

“The letters…” 

Your ears perk up, “You’ve seen them?” 

“No, I took them…” He says guilty and starts tearing off paint from the wall. 

“The guys wanted to prank you yesterday, we sent them, I’m really sorry.” 

He looks up again, “But I told them to not do anything more.” He reassures, but his voice trails off as you neither alienate or sigh at this confession. Eyes, lifeless as the posture in your arms hanging off your stale corpse. 

“You did what?” You ask; wishing you heard incorrectly the first time and he crashed a vase instead. 

“We sent your letters..” He says hesitantly with eyebrows knit. 

You close your eyes. Take your hands up your face to cup it and breathe in. Autumn semester starts in exactly 13 days and you know at least half of the letter receivers attend. And definitely all five live in the city. 

To breathe out, hands fall in your lap. He cocks an eyebrow at what one could guess is a meditation session before you open your eyes. 

“I’LL KILL YOU!” 

02 . CHAPTER TWO

( tuesday afternoon ) 

The letters were out; an existential dread running on two bags of pure sugar surged within you. A sensation you were oblivious to existed. First week went, and you hoped the mail man had fallen over and left the letters on the highway, doomed to get run over til their unreadable. But those wishes perished the very moment Eric Sohn came chanting underneath the window. The characteristic bird chimes and mowers intertwined in green leaf rustle; his voice echoed through open glass. You told mom not to tell him you were here; that you had already taken the train to the city. 

Destiny was in your favor for once, and your mother did lie when Eric came to the front door. 

So far, none crossed fate with the receivers of your letters has ensued. Eric was the only established friend in your life, hence you held yourself far, far away from any business major hot spots. Though, just after achieving three days. The first afternoon at the start of your part time; rulers leave you forced to stare eye to eye with receiver number one.

“This is Y/n, she will work as your athletic trainer assistant for this semester.” The trainer lifts hands to his side to make it even clearer than it already was. It is damn cold beside the ice rink–which you thank god for since your face would be blistered red otherwise. As he presents for all tall men in thick layers of hockey protection, they stare; you’re left to make a timid jazz hand motion with a strained smile. 

“I’m Y/n.” Hands fall back to your side and concentrate all might to look at the other eight people–not the one to the right. 

“She will be helping me with equipment and aid; so you’ll see her around a bit.” 

The players wave past you in turn; to introduce themselves in a mere identical manner. The last name pains deeply as you pretend to find shoelaces loose. 

“Jaehyun.” 

You can’t see his expression, not even when eyes come up. Only his back covered in blue jersey greets you as he steps off the plastic flooring and onto the ice. 

Though, it is an immediate opportunity for breathing room when all players go to practice. The plastic walls become solid and you look over the formations on ice. Maybe you got yourself free from this one? Maybe Hyunjae also thought it was so damn awkward that it’s easier to ignore it. You hope deeply while taking off one glove, as sultry temperatures rise beside the rink. 

Followed by the 30 minutes of relocating equipment around the center, the next time you come back into the ice hall, the trainer greets you with sweat outlining his sideburns. You knit your eyebrows before taking eyes off him and onto the player in navy; halting out the rink. Turns out Coach yelled two different instructions, followed after one another; which resulted in a collision of two players. 

He tells you to take him, who limps to the clothing rooms. By immediate compliance you approach his silhouette; leaning on the plastic divide. You can’t make out the exact expression as he faces the ground, but when you ask him if he needs help walking. That horribly handsome face from your childhood looks up. Breathing heavily, but smiles through the fringe. 

“Yeah.” 

You purse your lips into a thin line. To force sight away from him. You look at the entrance to the ice hall while taking his arm over your shoulders. Come to the clothing room after taking off his ice skates. The two intentions of your own conscience fought while walking. Nothing would be more awkward than looking at him again, on the other hand, the concern over his weak state is true as the continuous breath sounds loudly beside your ear. 

Hyunjae’s now on the bench before one side of the lockers. He watches attentively as you round the sport’s bags to take the first aid kit on the other side. The ventilation is the loudest thing in the room. At some point it becomes bothersome as you hold his clothing. You haven't made eye contact since the rink, but senses his gaze fixed over your scalp.  

He talks suddenly.

“You know Y/n, I got your letter.” He says while looking down at your hand; securing the bandage around his ankle. 

Fuck. 

Fingers stale from suspension for a moment on the bandage edges. The material loses around his ankle and you force it towards you. 

A sigh, still looking down, “Listen; it was my br–” 

“It’s appreciated Angel, but it will never happen.” His lips curve higher at one opposite edge, leaving his eyes on you with pleasure like he knows something wrong. 

You let go off his legs; weight from your hands fully on your knees as you observe–rolling your eyes. 

“I know, okay.” You breathe in, “What I was about to say was; my little brother sent it, it was not meant to be seen by you.” Another sigh before you force yourself up from the floor; coming in greater height than Hyunjae. 

“Also; I wrote it when I was like 11.” To turn to the first aid kit, “So don’t get your ego too high, Ice God.” 

“Sure, if that’s what you say, Angel.” Hyunjae takes his palms on the bench surface; leaning against the locker. Arch of his lips might rewrite your life when he proceeds to stare.  

“Why do you even call me that?” You return to the opposite side and cross arms; to perceive him roughly as if to build similar strain in him. But it leaves to no avail. 

“Why?” He quotes, “You’re sitting here healing us, our team’s little angel.” He shrugs his shoulders. 

You look away as to not blossom of rose pigment–instead start organizing the materials in the aid kit. 

“Either way, Jaehyun. You can go now, it’s done.” 

No length of his voice waves via the dead locker ocean. After eyes set on the sections of the green bag; you glance at his bench. And to make you uncertain, his white bandage leg is still in frame. After you pull the zipper and leave the kit in your lap; you stare at Hyunjae who, with the usual smile, stares back. 

“I said you can go…” Quietly and tilt your head towards the door. 

“I know.” Hyunjae voices in the same tone as before. 

You side eyes him still and sits up. 

“I have a deal. Would you like to hear it?” He says suddenly, causing a rupture across the room and stacked tension weighing on your shoulders.

“Okay…” There’s an uncertain principle, written like a formula over your expression, layered in your voice. 

“You go with me as my girlfriend for Jeno’s party this Friday.” He says monotone. 

The first aid kit frees from your hands. Eyes drifting between two points and you’re left looking eyebrow knit at him two meters away. Then, forced to turn when he smiles contempt. You swiftly bend down to take the aid kit before returning gaze. Hyunjae sees in center of two bags hanging; your lips sunder to shove down the offer. Right through the concrete to the core mit. 

“--Or else I’m putting up your letter for the whole campus to see.” 

You immediately shut sealed and eyelids folds half over the curvature. He smiles so hard it borders on comical. And with his arms crossed over his jersey, you only wait for them to fall and see him burst out laughing; tell you he got you. But the silence prevails your thoughts and you start to believe he’s actually serious. 

“I don't believe you.” You look tired at him. 

“No, I’m serious.” Hyunjae still nonchalantly crossed armed and slack raised shoulders. 

As another passage of ventilation comes through, beckon time like the minute visor. You finally sigh and sit down at the bench again. 

“Why even me? Can’t you just ask someone else?” Frustration over the seemingly complex idea for a deal when he could make it ten times easier for himself.

His expression falters for a second after the question. Hyunjae holds his lips sealed; unaltered high posture cause he hesitates to give away his shortcomings. But on the other hand, just a little empathy might do it. 

“I’m actually in a bad position, Angel.” He leans forward, voice quieter.

“Everyone knows I’ve got a girlfriend, but she broke up with me before the semester. They want to finally see her, but I got none” He pauses and leans his chin on his hand and pouts a little, “--just you.”

The withered corners of your face perks slowly up as he ends his sentence. Hyunjae smiles harder, believing he a white winged victory, but it disappears the very second you laugh in his face. Your back comes against the support of the bench while eyelids close to the bottom of laughter.

“She dumped you?” Hands gather in your knees. 

“Too bad, too bad.” 

It’s Hyunjae’s turn giving stale eyes. Though, just as fast; he gathers himself back and leans onto the lockers again. 

“Yeah, is it a deal or not, Angel?” 

You breathe in and look at him still. Hyunjae is more foolish than his appearance gave off, you don't have faith in first impressions. He might as well scan your lost letter and create a chain mail across campus. Partying wasn’t on your list for the first weekend of the semester, but maybe you could get away with lurking against the wallpaper?

You swing your left foot and finally look back at him, “Okay, deal then.” 

Hyunjae smirks. 

“Just this, then we're equal. No grudge, no obligations.” 

“Sure.” He nods. 

You tilt your chin down, “...I don’t trust you, Jaehyun.” 

He lets his hands up, “Look, I’m keeping my promise. I told you my dirt too.” 

“Like not having a girlfriend is as embarrassing as a love letter written in 2002.” 

( friday evening ) 

“Okay, should we go in then?” You take a step forward but get pulled by the shirt. Shoulders come up against him and the arm sleeve of his clothing folds against your nape.

From your first encounter until Friday; you were forced to persevere through charming–bordering on foolish–remarks. The weekend prophesied as projection on the glass entrance that Friday. And it shattered the very moment Hyunjae’s voice echoed from the changing rooms. That he’ll wait for you outside the women’s dormitory. With not a twitch in own expression, he disappeared behind the frame with a wink. 

One of your two roommates was also invited to the house party. The thought of having someone else other than ice god settled some relief. But as you stood waiting in the summer heat of night; the first bus went and fifteen minutes later, you saw a familiar silhouette to the left of the stairs you sat on. 

He didn’t say anything when you refused to sit up and just glared tired at him. 

“What’s with the face, Angel?” He had asked laughing lightly, “We’ll miss the bus.”, you are forced to stand. 

“You’re late, Ice God.” You muttered and started walking towards the bus stop. Hyunjae ran up beside.  

Both talked while the streetlights behind the glass window became all the more distant. Though, it didn’t become hopelessly quiet, as it was a loud friend group behind. You cursed your half sleeve arms when Hyunjae didn’t know the way to Jeno's house from the bus stop. Forced to traverse between bushes when he pointed at mindless directions. Swore that he knew the “shortcut”. And ants might as well have climbed up your toes and into your underwear. 

Now, as either stands before the three stairs and the entrance door in the midst of the front yard. You're pulled against his chest (still covered in leaves). 

“Not so fast.” 

Though he’s out of peripheral vision; the self satisfied tone at every articulate visualizes his smile. His hands like a thin veil across your shoulders–you take a step back from them, to face him fully. 

“Okay then? What’s the plan, Ice God?” You cross arms to build some fence–to match his pride. But either only shares an instant of eye contact before you press your lips and look towards the sad flowers hidden in the corner. 

Hyunjae has always enjoyed teasing people. Of course, a bit apprehensive to strangers, but nonetheless; he waits no time to poke at the first friend closest in sight. He himself has probably no thought about it, but he has a thrill for watching people’s reactions. You were no different. Like the sun; secret behind the trees, it’s always so obvious. You were flustered by his turns of nicknames and comments; so much that you feel to defend your blemished garden. There’s something endearingly professional about you, he thinks. 

“You have a lip balm or something?” He cocks an eyebrow. 

You look at your belongings; eyes looking as narrow threads when apprehensive. To wait for his signature laughter but instead nods his head. You roam around the bag; hands helping to widen your vision, but not enough to notice his fingers below the tender sprout against your head. You look up to see him with one of your two hair clips. Curious what he’ll do; you try no fence when he sets it on his fringe. 

“Now I’m yours.” He smiles. 

Hyunjae comes down to you slightly before returning; taking his eyes off and onto the entrance before brushing past your shoulder. Because of the evening shades, the red pigments on your cheeks withers out with skin as you look behind your shoulder to see Hyunjae’s figure let the deafening conversations from inside, out. He doesn’t look back towards you, and you knit eyebrows before taking double steps up the stairs and into the house. 

With one step you push yourself off the wallpaper; feel shoulders brushing up against your own as the living room opens. 

Hyunjae held your hand for the first half an hour. He then let go when something happened between the friends (you didn’t know). But even then you tailed after like some home cat. Though, as anxiety arose after seeing a group of Eric’s friends in the same room, you cautiously backed into the corner. Some stranger did the rest for you when they collided with the table and Jeno’s grandma fell lid first and shattered on the floor. It became a bit quiet when poor grandma(s ashes) laid there, all spread out. 

After Jeno panicked and some helped clean up; the chamber of incomprehensible conversations started again. 

There’s cliques scattered between the couches. You reach on high toes to see past all the height and hair to locate the frame you came in from. Soon you fall back to your heels, just as the chorus waves through the walls. The crowd suddenly opens up before you when two people walk away. You’re left still and see the open door to the hallway. Shoulders come down in height just as you breathe out. Relieved to take a step to finally leave; but your feet barely touch the wood until eyes widens and air asphyxiates in your throat. 

At the end of the high walls; Eric stands half a meter from the door frame. A lamp shines from behind him, lightning up his half body. Like the sun; he becomes the very essence of the narrow square. 

You turn in a desperate attempt for survival. This season heat and packed building; it all bends backwards through the grass field in all four directions. 

Immediately you see diagonally behind, a staircase up to the second floor. You don't even look back to Eric before colliding with someone's back and sprint up. There’s no lighting up the wooden stairs, just Earth’s wailing moon through the pier glass. 

All those voices–through speakers or chords–wanes like the full to crescent moon month. 

There’s closed doors around. It burns pace from behind and you take the handle of the door left to the stairs. Without letting it open even half way; you slip past the glimpse and lock it shut.

You lean close to the door; feel the cold wood on your left cheek. The party’s over on this side. Like the melancholic memory of falling asleep to the adults in the other room. 

When you expect nothing; a clear voice from behind reiterates peculiar sentences. 

Not strong enough to take your chin off the door; you look past your shoulder to see someone in the bathtub with a damned annotated book. 

It takes about three seconds from first contact until the bathtub guy flinches, “Ah!?” 

“Oh my god!” Your eyes widen while your shoulders contract as wings. 

It echoes between the tiles when his book lands on the bathtub floor. To face the sudden him, distressed; your hands come up in height with your wing like bone. 

“Sorry.” You deadpan. 

“No, it’s okay.” He answers, soft spoken. Eye contact stays fleeting as his fringe–like curtains–falls before the mirage window when he reaches for the book. He mends the awry strands into place; scour the wordy dimensions to where he left off. 

You recall his soft silken halo. Hands come down to its sides and you lean off the door. Like a main character from an academic tale; he looks deeply dreamlike–always somewhere else. The guy feels your presence still as above the title cover; his eyes peeks. 

At this point, you look at him with wide eyes horror; ready for him to either aristocratically roast your fourteen old writing, or condense into second hand embarrassment and hide under the bathtub. 

Lee Juyeon sits in the damn bathtub of a house party. 

As you’re deep in fourth dimensional torment; Juyeon speaks first. 

“Oh, Y/n.” 

He smiles, still holds the book before him. 

You refuse to move, “Hi…Juyeon.” 

“That was a long time.” He switches between your eyes and the next sentence. 

The tension in your frame aids in turn for every second. Juyeon doesn’t mention any letters, but still, you eye him suspiciously. 

“Yeah.” You agree awkwardly. 

“Why are you here?” You ask. 

Juyeon pauses in sentence once again to shift his fringe and look up. You had nearly forgotten the patterns of silence and speaking he so often followed. Back when they always met; they spent so many seconds simply waiting for him to talk. 

“I would ask you the same thing.” He sort of tilts his head attentively. 

With your lips pursed instead of answering, you look to the mirror above the sink. Water in delicate droplets dive in while he turns the next page. 

“Escaping things?” He asks, still reading.  

You nod. 

“We all do.” 

You see him through the mirror reflection. His eyes bent like a faint wave from shore; reassures her lone presence. 

As he closes off himself again; you figure he doesn’t mind their shared space. There’s no sign of knowledge about your letter. Juyeon always reeked of innocence, so maybe you’re wishing. 

But Eric’s still one floor below (taking the safe option). 

You take a seat on the bathtub edge. Shoulder faces Juyeon who leans his back on the discolord cream white tiles. . 

“Should I read something for you?” He asks soothingly. 

You hesitate before letting your hands comfortably down the edge, “Okay.” 

“You want some?” He reaches out the green glass bottle. 

Your shoulders scoff when your mind affirms, “Thank you.” 

Juyeon asks suddenly, “How’s Scuba Steve?” 

Truly the only thing left that protects from not spitting out the alcohol is embarrassment. You do an expression tainted by drinks or unease, and let the bottle down your lap. 

To wonder how in the passage of all years; Juyeon recalls your insignificant house cat that mated with his own (or maybe it’s not that weird when you think after). 

There’s a sort of foolish–bordering on stupid–touch in your chest that he actually never forgot Scuba Steve. One could guess we live on, assuming we’re the only one that remembers. 

“Oh, he’s dead.” You deadpan.

“Oh.” 

The room reaches–what resembles closest to silence– in a house party. Both their lips are pressed in thin lines as they view the tiles above each other again. 

“You then?” Silence starts to torture you briefly in your fingers.

“How’s…” Your face contracts in parallel to the ceiling when scattered bleached cuts from that black little cat sleeping on his floor. 

“Mindy?” He says. 

“Oh, Yeah.” 

They both laugh. 

“She’s still alive.” He lets the book down for the first time (excluding the jumpscare), “She’s with mom and dad. Though she's getting very old now, she eats less and doesn’t even go out anymore.” 

As they sat there talking about cats and poetry; eventually the boundary past the toilet door ceases. You didn’t leave that end of the bathtub (aside from running down the kitchen with Juyeon for more alcohol). 

Now they lie on opposite builds against the cold edge. It’s been sometime since you drank, specifically this much. You can’t talk for Juyeon, but he seems pretty damn wasted too. Your eyes dares to fall while Juyeon’s shirt climbs up his chin as he comes deeper down the tub. 

“I can’t wake up here.” You mumble. Either to yourself or decked out Juyeon; you don't know. He answers something incomprehensible back as a bottle in the scattered line before the bathtub falls. While you grasp for the handle, you turn barely to Juyeon who has his eyes half open. 

“Bye, Juyeon, it was epic.” You wave your free hand, “Tell Mindy I said Hi.” 

“I’ll do.” He tiredly answers back. 

The alcohol withers boundaries within your body. Turns it weak for the downstairs crowd, like poison inducing nausea. In line with poison; You walk as if zombie apocalypse smitten down the stairs without holding onto the railing. Somehow reaches the ground floor and passes through the living room. 

Whatever mechanisms your mind built to defend its dignity from Eric; it took the place of the alcohol in its glass bottles. You’re in the hallway, three meters from the entrance. It’s overheating–worse than a sauna–in the house. Mere presence of tepid air has your hands trailing along the walls. 

A warmth presence dividing the you and outside blocks. In a desperate drunk attempt you push against it and complain. 

“Out the way, you’re fucking hot.” 

“I am?” 

It speaks back, in a tone rather mischievous than what your state calls for. With a shift of the inner lightning; you realize you have your hands on a uni jacket. The logo turns and you would accuse him of motion sickness. 

From your face-low angle, his hands are tied between the blue pockets. You lean harder on the wall to force your chin where his head is tilted with a smile to the same degree. 

“You’re still here.” You still complain and his face drops. Eyes fleet between your face, the opposite wall, and the entrance door to return. 

“That wasn’t a compliment, right?” His fingers directed to his chest. 

“No, Einstein.” Eyebrows knit when realizing you’ve drifted off the main mission. Two shoulders on opposite ends collide as you hastily drag along to the frame. 

“Woah, woah.” The male student takes your wrist lightly, “I don’t think that’s a good idea.” 

“I think it’s a great idea.” You defend without knowing. 

“You’re gonna fall down the stairs.” 

His voice is strangely worried which you would have been touched by, if it wasn’t for the drunk state. 

Mid temperatures of night may have transpired any senses as you don't answer. He takes this to come up in line with you; one decimeter away from the first stairs. 

There’s two people, solitude in a hammock to the right, and prey like shadows of two around the grass. Music from inside is still too loud, and it probably hides someone puking at the other end. 

“I’ll help you, okay? I’m not a weirdo.” 

You turn your head to side eye him. Either promise respect or sacrificially bow down, he throws his hand up. To then gently lie it on your shoulder, lead you down. 

“That’s what a weirdo would say.” You mumble without working against him. 

Gravel scratches underneath their feet and the male student takes his hand off your shoulder; though still twined by the wrist. 

He starts, “I need your name, I should call–” 

“Sunwoo!” 

It seizes pulsations from inside, and the male student takes his head from you. Features on his face and the blue jacket is immediately recognised by the one below. The student's eyes are wide and Sunwoo’s eyebrows hold a neutral position above. 

“Jaehyu–”

“She’s my girlfriend!” Hyunjae takes your wrist from him. 

“Why are you still standing here?” He agitates before wandering off the gates with you. 

Sunwoo shoves his hands up in height with his chest once again; not risking to start fighting with the reigning hockey player while he’s half drunk, half angry.

“I don’t think I’m allowed in here.” Sounds tense. 

“It’s not like you’re here to hook up.” 

“They don’t know that.” Hyunjae deadpans. 

After both left Sunwoo at the stone stairs, Hyunjae coursed through the shrubbery once again. You seemed confused over the interaction; he doesn’t think you even realized the hand on your own changed. He thought you would sober up during the train ride, but you still took irregular stepping patterns down the warm lighted gravel path. 

While down the glass entrance to the soaring female dormitory; Hyunjae motioned you to walk in. But as fast he let go of your shoulder, you stumbled three steps back. 

“What should we do then?” Hyunjae asks, frustrated. 

“I don’t know, it was your idea to go the party.” You cross arms. 

“And yours to get so drunk that you can’t stand.” He spits back. 

The night pulls them close when they wait lonely, as if exiled. Summer cicadas swallow their venom words and when one street lamp flickers; Hyunjae sighs and takes a seat down the stairs. You follow. 

Once the peaceful moon renders all its light, leaving it to its bones; your head falls to his shoulder. While you carve shapes in its craters, your arms mindlessly pull him close. The strands of your hair accumulate on his neck, and while filed under the same sky, your breath sounds like a soundtrack to him. 

Like the passage from day to night; he notices his heart like it’s vastly alive. How many eyes have looked at him adoringly, but he can’t even anxiously look down your side. It’s familiar yet strange, he refuses to acknowledge it. And still you are oblivious, can’t even see his blushing face. 

“Shouldn’t you go home?” You ask softly. Tired and slow in contrast to the previous sentence. 

“I can’t leave you here.” He finally looks down at you. 

“Then you're going to be tired tomorrow.” Guilt visually lines your sunken silhouette. 

Hyunjae smiles, “You’re gonna be too.” 

He speaks gently again after silence, “Sober up a bit more and you’ll walk up.” 

03 . CHAPTER THREE

( saturday midday )

Not because you thought you were immortal anyway, but the next morning came crashing through the roof. While grieving your roof (it wasn’t broken), you swore the ceiling fan was up to mock you in its circles. All while last night lingers as a supercut. 

Your two roommates had woken up earlier, they were supposed to go out. Where? You can’t remember; at that point you were still trying to figure out who you bickered with outside Jeno’s stairs. 

Either way, the bottom line is; you didn’t throw off your clothes, and no texts from Eric. 

The campus is idyllically still in late summer. Bird whistle intertwines with the wind who walks like you through the grass, under the same gravel path Hyunjae led you yesterday. Sun drenched tree crowns and your eyes yearn through the gaps. 

There’s a yellow haze over the world and when you take another step; charge in gravel comes from behind. How your legs sway towards the grass border, fleeting levels with your eyes over your shoulder. A bicycle comes half a meter before; stops it with his right foot.

“Oh–Hi, Y/n.” 

“Oh, Juyeon?” 

He jumps off the saddle and they fall in same line. 

“You look a bit tired?” Juyeon asks in a voice, perfect sync with the bird song. Once again the world falls so dream-like behind him. 

“Yeah, yesterday was…stressful.” You take a palm up to your forehead. 

Juyeon’s smile falters, anxiously tilts his head, “Did I do something last night?” 

“No,no–something else happened…not you.” Hand between the open space which you wave reassuringly. His eyes become concerned and yours only redder. Hyunjae’s touch still lingers on that half of your body; you’re afraid Juyeon can see it. 

You ask something else instead, “You then? You’re not tired?”

He laughs softly, “A bit.” “But I’m supposed to meet a family friend.”

You nod. 

Leaving the last tree behind; the blue sky opens up, just in time for his revelation. Juyeon turns to you fully. Merely one can make out the contour of a light bulb above his head. 

“She bought two of our kittens; Lemon and…” He knits his eyebrows, unable to see your eyes, brilliant with curiosity. 

“I forgot.” He laughs, “They’re big now, I see them sometimes.” 

“Really?” 

Juyeon hums, “Do you want to see them?” 

“Of course!..if it’s okay for your friend?”

“She’s a lady my mother knows.” Juyeon takes one leg over the bicycle saddle and tilts his head–so that his hair too–points to the rack. 

“Jump on.” 

To exchange his eyes with the bicycle rack; you purse your lips and walk behind. Hands immediately cling to the metal frame, but as Juyeon weighs forward, you hold onto his shirt. 

Juyeon looks back and smiles as you struggle, “Hold my waist or you’ll fall off.” 

At this moment, you’re so deeply relieved he hasn’t read your letter. It eases the touch in your hands as they come to his front. Shirt folded above your clasped hands lies like a veil.

That feeling, of when a perfect alignment of past and memory presents. It washes over one as soften, melancholic, whiplash. You hadn’t thought about his scent in years, but as they chase the sun yet never pass it, his shirt touches your cheek. In his home where they used to sit on knees beside each other. It flutters your heart tenderly. 

At the high end peak you felt burdensome. Juyeon reassured you while weighing onto the pedals standing. He seemed to quietly persist in breathing through his nose, even when he was audible panting. 

He led the bicycle to the front, beneath the shadowed roof; you cast your eyes over the asphalt end. The wind rushes through nature up here. As such the foreground, alive, before the still concrete and bricks. 

Juyeon called your name to where he waited beside the door. With a half a shoulder hidden by his own, the bell goes off. A lady opens and smiles instantly as she sees Juyeon. Her wrist in rose patterns reaches out for his shoulder, comforts it gently. Since you’re a stranger; you’re left to awkwardly observe and retell like a narrator. 

“Oh, you have a girl with you?” She smiles at Juyeon, which he returns. He introduces you to the lady while she weakly widens the door gap. 

She still talks when three cats come to the hallway rug. Curiously they silently circle your legs, but they too can tell you’re no threat. 

An orange cat, clothed in layers of orange fur, brushes its head against your calf. You immediately bend down to pet it. To figure out if this fox-like complexion existed in your past too; you tilt your head. But your cat’s were more like crows than foxes. 

Apparently something must have shown because Juyeon says from beside. 

“This is Belle, they had their own kittens here. Ours are probably resting on the couch.” 

You look up, “Oh.” 

The old lady goes to the kitchen to take out tea and biscuits. Meanwhile Juyeon guides you to the living room where three other cats lie in the cushions of a worn down brown couch. Their socks tenderly span across the clear floor, and it must have woken them up. You smile briefly when they instantly seem to recognize him; reach their heads up for touch once he sits. All weights deeper down the material once you sit beside him. Touching shoulders to see a cat lick his finger in his lap. 

Like a jet black scarf in his jeans pattern; it contrasts from the faint white mark–like a moon at night–on her head. 

“She’s so big now.” You say when visions from those evenings before the TV playing Sailor Moon. You called out her name–Luna–that day when you saw her cramped between her siblings. 

Juyeon also named a kitten after a TV show he watched..

“Is that Mum Mew?” 

Now in direction towards the floor; a larger cat, half underneath the couch, half on your feet. 

Juyeon laughs, “He’s Oscar now.” He leans closer and whispers, “I don’t think I’ve ever told her that was his original name.” 

They sit there until the lady comes out again. 

“It’s so lovely that you got a girlfriend, Juyeon.” She puts down the plate and the two look at her, “I’ve all actually thought about you a lot. I’ve been thinking about calling your mother to set you up with someone, I started to get a bit worried.”

The lady has an attentive x on her face. The skin on her forehead hides nothing as it folds, deeply contemplated. Only with your head down and suppressed smile, can you clearly notice the plates against wooden surfaces. Juyeon scratches his nape frantically while laughing. 

"Yeah, uhh–” He stammer. 

“You know, by your age, I was with many guys.” She sits down on the opposite chair. 

“We got together, then we broke up. I had a guy in Paris who I really liked.” She leans forward, “Back then I was so in love I wanted to stay. I thought he was perfect! Kind, handsome, sex–”

“What’s the type of cookie?” Juyeon suddenly bursts out. Leaned over the table pointing at the brown one that’s obviously chocolate. But the lady doesn’t seem to bother. 

“Oh, you see!” 

You press your lips, the color might have vanished. Though it was painfully awkward; Juyeon was just adorable enough to turn the situation endearing. She still describes in detail over her mother’s mother recipe; and Juyeon from the side nods his head attentively, like he always does. 

After another conversation, the topic returns. 

“So when did you meet?” 

Turns to exchange question marks between you. His eyes don't say much and you guess yours neither. 

Juyeon scratches his nape, “We’ve been friends for sometime.” 

Lady nods, “Since when?” 

“Like…” He looks at you for confirmation, “...fourteen or fifteen?” 

“Did you confess, Juyeon? Or Y/n?” She smiles and looks at you, “Juyeon is a bit shy, I’ll be surprised if he confessed.” 

He retreats back to the couch; sinks down the heavy material. You laugh lightly at how his shoulders, swallows by waves of brown textile. 

“Y/n actually liked me first back then.” He points out gently.

You freeze. 

“Then I confessed in university.” 

The old woman does a sweet smile; hands patterned of life lie like a cover over her heart as she looks at both. 

For the longer you’re in someone’s presence; one starts to adjust to the traits. But even how many conversations went on and the sun above crossed her roof; your shoulders hardened. Like irreversible death does to your physical state, you seem unable to look to Juyeon’s side. By all stars in the universe; you’re suddenly transparent. Obvious, translucent piercing glass. 

You looked out the window at the old woman’s house; terrifyingly, the sky was pink. All the world disappeared at fatal speed when they bicycled back to campus. There must be a sort of brilliant snow, in a color out of our spectrum, that rains down on Earth in summer evening. It leaves the landscape quiet and calm. Cicadas sing when everyone else ceases to. 

None of you felt like going to the dorms just yet, instead; you now sit in the auditorium. Though either laugh echoes throughout the wide open space, there’s a dissolving acid in your lungs, begging to drink all air. 

All those characteristics of a person reveal to the open world after all these years. Because you can’t remember Juyeon being so persistent in apologizing. They came in on the “girlfriend” incident; he smiled embarrassingly, felt guilty for forcing you in on it. You told him it was okay. 

After echoing silence; it soars through the auditorium. Juyeon reaches down his backpack with all its scattered papers. There’s a velvety pulse keeping the space next to you occupied while he’s elsewhere. Once Juyeon comes out of the canvas material; your eyes widen in terror, contrasting the melodic decoration of red velvet and wood. 

Your conscious runs desperately from this room, but physical state is in the same seat. 

Juyeon holds out a blue letter with your handwriting on it. 

“I should’ve said it sooner, I’m sorry.” He says in that gentle tone he always speaks to you with. Maybe a soft arch at the end of the sentence. Nonetheless, you imaginary stabs the mind resting in your bone cradle. 

“It’s okay, it’s okay.” You look at him once before turning to the empty seat and make an expression. One of deep second hand embarrassment that comes from the very narrow part of ‘me’ and sends like shivers. 

“I understand.” Juyeon follows your movements, “You were not supposed to see that letter, they shouldn’t have been leaked.” 

Worried you might have genuinely caused borderline trauma for the poor guy; you turn to him, “I’m really sorry.” 

“No.” The corners of his lips turn into leaves of a red apple. His eyes clouds the color round the pupil and his height convulses barely as he leans into the seat. 

Parts of us never veins, and in front of you, he’s the same boy who patted kittens and was deeply sad when they parted from their mother.  

“I’m honestly very touched by it.” He admits. 

He was back in his childhood home for the last week before semester. When folding the navy sheets of his old bed; his mother came up. A letter in her hand with turquoise color and bubble arch letters in pink ink. Already, it couldn’t be something written in ‘today’. 

And Juyeon is truthful towards you. He read it on the train back home. Always oblivious but grateful nonetheless. Used the window like a passage to the time where you sat beside him on the bedroom floor. 

“Really?” You say surprised. 

He nods, “I’ve never gotten a love letter before.” 

You would scoff and tell him he’s lying, but as his appreciative eyes blur with the blue envelope; you don’t. 

“You know, I think you should join the writer’s club here on campus.” Juyeon smiles at you suddenly. 

“What?” You lean away. 

“Really.” His eyes shapes of honest o’s, “Like–of course there’s some grammar mistakes and you spelt ‘desperatly’ wrong, but you got the feeling!” 

Still the same skeptical expression answers him back. 

“I’m really serious Y/n.”

Own hands in your lap trail towards each other like opposite poles, “I’ll think about it.” 

You watch how he timidly holds the edges and opens the envelope again. Lips shaped in pout like he wonders. 

“Does it bother you if I keep it?” He asks. 

Head shake, though still confused, “No, you can keep it.” 

“Thank you.” He smiles endearingly and tucks it back between the papers and folders. 

A revelation wasn’t as horrid as you thought. Hyunjae’s was deeply embarrassing, but there’s a brief space for contemptment in your heart where anxiety wandered before. Like a visual sight of the butterfly; you look up at the auditorium and ponder over the hidden connections.

You didn’t expect anything from Juyeon; that time has passed. But his now grown up presence seems to fulfill this daily life too. 

“Did others get letters?” Juyeon breaks silence. Like always, his expression paints past the physical boundaries, and one could make out white lines of curious cat ears. 

You figure he means the “they shouldn’t have been leaked”. 

You nod and he tilts his head. Visual intrigue and anticipation from his seat, but you close off in rose pigment like tired flowers. 

“I'd rather not tell you, it’s a bit embarrassing.” You laugh and Juyeon leans back, reassuring. 

This anticipating silence doesn’t cease. It exists as a continuation, a ‘more’ before the ‘end’. One person can’t seem to leave the edge undiscovered, rather, you wait for the red thread to tie its last loop. 

“You know Eric has been looking for you? He seems to miss you a lot.” Juyeon finally says. Tone serious than anything else that left his lips. 

A stone grows between your throat, not acid. There’s no dissolving, just constant aching as you try to move. 

Juyeon continues to talk as you’re silent, “I don’t know what it is, but he’s very understanding…”

He pauses, “...and you know, cause you know him better than I do.” 

04 . CHAPTER FOUR

( tuesday, morning )

“Where’s the psychiatrist?” 

“At the library.” 

“No, I can’t talk to Juyeon anymore.” He groans. 

To drift from the flat roofs outside the window; Eric looks at Sunwoo, further the beige walls. Sunwoo’s head is deep tucked beneath the bedding; Eric crawls over from his own bed to the end of Sunwoo’s. When the weight leans towards Sunwoo’s feet, he closes the pink envelope and lets the navy sheets hide it. The cover comes off Sunwoo’s head by Eric. His face like the moon causes an eclipse over the sun and Sunwoo stares unenchanted back at it. 

“Y/n still haven't answered my messages, it’s been like three weeks!” Eric forces the pillow down. 

“I wouldn’t answer you either.” Sunwoo pats bedding over his chest while Eric throws the pillow at his side. 

They just became friends at the end of the last semester and decided to room for this year. As one’s social circles opens up in double doors whenever Eric comes; your name was one of the first he heard. Sunwoo immediately leaned intrigued at the name, but figured it was just a mere coincidence. He was bound to grow from youth and twine old names with new faces. 

Either way, destiny doesn’t exist, and he won’t take a bait from the universe. Though, Sunwoo threaded over that principle the week before uni started. He worked at the old summer camp and a letter came during the closing week. 

“To Sunwoo”, nothing else. Curiosity took the best of him and he opened the letter to see “From Y/n'' at the end of a massive paragraph. 

The universe got him this time, he admits. In how many positions has he reread the letter and dreamt of the yellow filtered summer from when he was thirteen. In truth he reminiscenced about you those summer’s after. Once reaching adulthood, he realized there was no point in yearning, it’s been years. But this late season has turned into the car ride home from that camp, still with you in vision, so close but not here.

At this point ‘Y/n’ feels like a mere fragment of his imagination; therefore he wont tell. Keep your name from any seekers and contemplate. 

After laughter; Eric plummets to the bed and looks up at the ceiling, feeling Sunwoo’s legs at his elbow. 

“I just don’t understand why she can’t talk to me.” He murmurs. 

“Did anything happen?” 

Only Juyeon knows about the letter Eric received from his best friend. A confession he has longed for since he lived in his castle (big house), but never would be granted. 

Eric thought their connection was stronger than this. Why did you send it if you weren't seeking answers? Why now, this place at this time? 

He has traced every curve of your letters; stared at facebook and mail box. Even the refrigerator at night for answers. 

Though everything the roommates did this summer; Eric can’t tell him, not yet. It’s the luminous memories coming to his ruins. Sunwoo is his presence. 

Silent melancholia climbs above the horizon together with the bleeding sun at the football field. Lines of the goals, rigid and angular, separate the pink-orange growing fragments. Breeze from east colds your heated heart while waiting on the bleachers for Hyunjae. 

You were forced to wake up; not following the united routine of the dormitory when he needed help for a training pass at dawn. But he’s not in sight. 

Half asleep leaning on the backpack, center of your lap; waiting for something holy to run past. 

World’s colors fade into abstraction behind the pupil and a small figure crosses the field. You don’t notice how it leaves the red tracks, closer to the bleachers. Same breeze that touched you passes through its shirt and by mere coincidence. He turns his head opposite from the sunrise and sees you lone illuminated. 

Sunwoo recognises the person despite different clothing. There’s an unconscious underlying characteristic in posture. Sunwoo has been entranced by his own world, but he did think a lot of the pretty girl who fell drunk out of the entrance at Jeno’s party. 

Slowly his feet take him further from the white lines. 

“You’re okay?” His voice tears the plaster away from your vision. 

To look up from the bleacher, a ruler higher than the green grass, they make eye contact. It takes a pattern of blinking but at last you speak. 

“What?” 

“I saw you at the party last Friday, I just wonder if you’re okay?” He repeats. 

A sort of second hand deja vu like nausea, spreads from the visual, coming back. Forces the parallel expression to the feeling, down and instead scratches your head. 

“Oh.” Eyes widen, “Yeah, I’m okay now, thanks.” 

Solitude pushes down into the field with the next breeze. The two of them linger in the same place though the conversation seemed to have ended long ago. You who tie eyes on the far tower of the male dormitory, look back towards him. He stands with barely knit eyebrows, two meters away. It’s not an uncomfortable stare whatsoever, rather curious as the sun rising above the world. 

You smile, “You’re trying to place me…” 

Trying destiny runs through him but nonetheless he’s taken by the sudden realization. You see how the expression unravels and a single shooting star passes the brown coloration of his left eye. 

“You’re Y/n; Y/n from summer camp?” 

You don't react as quickly and are now left blaring into the past and present and the same time. 

“We went kayaking together, don’t you remember?” He points at himself, “I’m Sunwoo.” 

The star falls in east and transcends pink orange shine throughout the campus. For a second; you would have fallen from first row down the grass field with knees bruised of embarrassment, but just in time, you realized that the address written on the letter wasn’t his, just the camp. 

“Sunwoo?” Your posture folds higher to come into view with his own. Truly there’s exciting nostalgia within. 

“I didn’t know you went here.” You say slowly. 

“Me neither.” Sunwoo laughs. 

While in awe over the struck of fate; eyes momentarily drift to the right. Another shadow cuts through the horizon and appears closer while jogging across the field. All light still shines in your eyes while standing up. They come in equal footing and quietly watch each other. He looks over behind and sees Hyunjae. Sunwoo doesn’t quite feel like leaving yet; wished they were stored a moment longer. 

His arms just barely lifts off his sides to embrace you, but the sharp sequence of Hyunjae and you strikes him at the spinal cord. Not wanting to disrupt your relationship again. 

You’re left with wide eyes as Sunwoo runs off the direction he appeared from. 

“Bye Y/n, see you around!” 

It all just played as if at two times speed. One hand lifts to wave from your side of the world while the last strands disappear beyond the goals. 

By peripheral vision, Hyunjae traces Sunwoo. Once more, there’s a torturous sensation growing between marrow bone and heart. When you look his way he feels your eyes held down on him only. 

“You never take water with you, Ice God.” 

While still a meter across, you throw the water bottle to him and he captures it perfectly. Hyunjae looks up with eye-framed windows like staring at the sun. 

“You’re close with Sunwoo?” 

Your bag falls to the ground, “We went to summer camp together, I didn’t know he studied here.” 

Briefly nod while his bag too comes down the grass. You lucid leaning onto the bleachers again–until Hyunjae starts sprinting in one place. The end strands of his hair in parallel motions and his child-like smile shine between the pauses. 

“Let’s run.” He says. 

“I have a volleyball match later.” Back falls to the second and third row as you complain. 

He laughs and takes your wrist, “Running helps with stress.” 

White ribbons knitted along the green corners; they jog the red track field and do a few rounds. Each passage closest to the bleachers you see the shadows diagonally downgrade across the seats. 

Despite having their lungs barely reaching air; Hyunjae persists in conversation. It presses from Earth towards your upper body as you unconsciously choose words before steps. But Hyunjae too seems incredibly out of breath for someone that trains as much as he does. 

You won’t admit it just yet–if ever–that his company is actually enjoyable. 

He lingers across the sport’s center until the shift has ended, and talks to you in insignificant states. In one way; your long shadow at the end of your feet feels guilty. An idea of a self serving dude with too much attention. In truth; he laughs a lot. 

“When’s the game?” Hyunjae asks as their feet come out of synch. 

They stand still catching breath. 

“At three.” You sigh and start walking to the bleachers. 

“Then, I’ll skip this lesson.” Hyunjae stands next to you. 

He takes out the water bottle you gifted him. Presence from your side lingers on him as he drinks, and he raises his eyebrows at the long look. 

“You don’t have to come though.” The lines above eyes cross in a slight perplexed X. 

“You were at my game last time, I should come to.” Hyunjae smiles gently. 

( tuesday, afternoon )

“Need to go to the toilet; nervousness makes me pee.” 

‘21’ in bold font disappears behind the bended wall. You direct towards people in fitted shirts as patterns before the teal walls.

It’s not usual for you to be nervous before games; nor to be completely absorbed by else’s. Now you’re unconventionally a bit more dreamy. The halo in your eyes, up at the sky and shoulder’s slack as if moon-touched. Your teammates pointed it out too when you didn’t answer after ‘Y/n!’. 

Sunwoo reentered your life this morning. The boy that had caused such a heartbreak it was unbelievable. And despite your time changes, you found yourself counting the star constellations he told you that summer. 

This sort of unending chase starts again, that the letters dated to the old camp will find its way to him. Like a foolish child's secret. 

You also wonder why Hyunjae was so persistent on going to your match. One could thread through the interactions and guess he’s become comfortable in your life too. But there’s a brief self reflection. You neither rejected him to come or encouraged. Maybe you want someone up on the bleachers shouting your name, even if it’s not Eric. 

Wooden floor reflects the studio lights like water. Eyes wanders immediately from teammates up to the bleachers. Blue plastic seats on row, to the very windows where it barely collides with the roof. There’s a few silhouettes in groups up on the high rows. Everyone waving their hands to someone, not you. 

When you see number 21 stop before the white line and bring her arm high up to one standing; you suddenly regret not messaging Eric. Though, just as fast; he maybe wouldn’t even have showed up? 

One loud whistle comes from the left; your head directs off the green line tracing vertically. Sees teammates reach their hand out for you to the ring building at the side of the rectangular room. On the opposite, mirrors like theirs in green shirts, they gather.

Thin water like bubbles trace down the narrow row from your temples. All these bubbles that have accumulated beneath the shirt, down knees and threading your throat like a transparent necklace. 

Once the last whistle soars across ceiling; you return to the corner of teammates. Someone touches your arm while running for water; a teammate smiles sincerely but exhausted. 

When shoes are in line with the white painted diagonal; your name chants above all noise. From the floor, your eyes see Hyunjae coming down the blue seats. You aren’t able to reiterate his name before arms of his own wrap around shoulders. 

The invincible spot of cologne sits beneath his shoulder blade. Evoking gently as your chin, supported by the broad shoulder. You hesitantly hug him back and try to look at his face but only reaches his ear. 

Suddenly you feel a bit insecure. 

“I’m really sweaty, Hyunjae.” You laugh awkwardly. 

“Yeah,” His hands retrites without walking back. 

Lips curve to gentle his face and the eyes like porcelain. 

“, and it fits you.” 

A strand falls before your eyes; tucked in by his hands like a dove’s wing. 

Once the match heat flush red, another round of pigment paints your cheeks. There’s no hinder above your eyes left, but still you shake your head and cough; all while Hyunjae still smiles. 

“Thank you, Jaehyun.” 

His expression, more blinding than the long lights above. It’s impossible to not curl up before. You have a certain love for looking away when adoration blooms like spring season on him. Somehow you seemed to have missed when he came to the bleachers too. 

It’s quiet, but Hyunjae still feels like hearing your voice. 

He starts, “You did grea-”

“Y/n!” 

A voice so deeply teared apart and assembled within your mind, that it exists stored in the furthest corners. There’s a certain nerve created just to react to that tone fall, you believe. 

With eyes widened and fingers loosen from each other; you pierce towards the blue door. People still run past your double vision, but for a second the world stopped. 

Eric stands with hands in the blue frame. The universe must’ve heard that wish you prayed before, and in some way, full of relief and exhaustion, you’re happy it did. Eric is visually as hesitant as you, bearing fear and soft in heart pulses. 

“Sorry, Hyunjae, it’s something important.” You jog up to the double door determined. With one last glance to the bleachers, “See you later! …Thanks for coming!” 

Confinement exists excruciating; you hoped it was just the sunbleached walls with square hole windows that trapped them. But not even the open atmosphere, heaven to the infinite universe could save them from what’s been left unsaid. 

Eric asked while passing doors “I have messaged you for two weeks, why didn’t you answer?”. You could only look at him for a second before turning to the open field. His expression begs of confusion, but truly you think he knows why. 

It’s silent. Wind from east campus brushes between the grass. You become the only thing stagnant along the heavy constructions weighing down on Earth as Eric walks up the bleachers. Blue faded denim pockets console his hands as he holds sight on his converse before white plastic. 

“You didn’t even tell me you had a game today.” He refuses to make eye contact. 

Head falls low; everythings to remind you that guilt is the heaviest matter on Earth. 

Theoretically, it’s supposed to be useless feeling alone or unloved with a person like Eric. Sometimes you catch yourself staring in mirrors to search for another pair of eyes. But it’s hard to be miserable when Eric’s been a phone call away. 

It was lonely without you, but I pushed you away. 

“I’m sorry.” You finally say. 

It’s the only thing you get out as you walk up the bleachers. Together on the second row; they watch the green grass and its maroon building boxes. A mellow sun on the edge of disappearing while the land continues flat forever. A wind of different temperature while the concrete still radiates warmth. 

“I’m sorry for ignoring you Eric.” You speak again. 

Their shoes in different font over the white row; you look at them before his side appears in the same position as you. They make eye contact in what feels timeless and it trips on your heart. 

“I was-” 

“It’s oka-” 

There’s silence as they stare at each other; anticipating the other. Though the ink period of the passage becomes laughter as their shoulders collide like the southern and north pole. It ends up being Eric who speaks. 

“You’re forgiven.” He smiles and Earth sighs of relief with you. 

The two poles of their angular edge bind them gently. North and south diasporas sit in silence, whispers of the flat city come from all directions and it smells like grass or nothing in particular. 

A closed connection where everything flows freely without hinder; you had nearly forgotten about that feeling. 

Courage drapes whatever embarrassment was left in you. To breathe in before honest confession. That you love him deeply still, though any romanticized visions are of the past. 

As you think of it; a part of the old self frees and runs with you back towards the grass field. 

“I actually like you too, Y/n.” 

It hitches in your throat. 

“You don’t have to answer yet.” His smile reeks of cotton candy, and the hand on her shoulder before he leaves radiates in puddles like theme parks. 

“I’ll wait for you, princess!” Eric shouts with his hand in his pockets before turning his back. The same nickname he’s called you since seven, never understanding why. 

The stark contour of the real world fades as he disappears towards the dormitory until he’s just a mere dot. 

It’s still warm, but summer has made one privileged. You feel like wearing a jacket as your old self now takes the empty space beside. 

05 . CHAPTER FIVE 

( thursday, afternoon )

Ji Changmin has never been great at sport, and that’s never with a big N. Last night the breaking news of a 2 day beach party got delivered by the infamous friend group, and of course, everyone would be playing the mandatory volleyball games. 

Changmin took his backpack and ran, hoping Eric would be too busy arguing with someone else to notice the empty chair. But at last, Changmin walked up the dormitory corridor with Eric hanging from his left calf like chained. Desperately begging that it wouldn’t be the same if everyone doesn’t come. 

One thing led to the other and every dorm heard a passing march of footsteps to the other end. Changmin was running after Eric whilst he screamed of absolute terror (traumatized from the year before when changmin chased him down the campus, drunk). In a last attempt of escape; Eric jumped Juyeon’s room and made a borderline olympic leep down the bedding before Juyeon processed the door had been opened. 

Like the unofficial therapist he is; Juyeon told Changmin he has a friend in the volleyball team that can teach him this afternoon so as to not embarrass himself completely. 

And that’s how you stand in the same hall; wide eyed and chills growing like rose stems it might strangle you. Though, you could’ve been more embarrassed as Changmin looks about the same. 

With an aggressive tilt to your shoulder while eyelids reach your eyebrows; a firm stare directed at Juyeon. Quietly it signals “what the fuck didn’t you tell me it was Changmin?!”. 

He doesn’t get it. 

“...and he’s really bad.” Juyeon ends while smiling. 

“I’m not that bad.” Changmin side eyes the taller one; also in search for some backup. 

“Yes, you are silly.” His eyes crease in turn with the ends of his lips. From the right side, his hands come up to ruffle the sprout of Changmin’s head. 

All three compiled the net up. You had no interest in bringing up the letter for either Changmin or Juyeon; therefore you rigid and pale served the first shot. 

But thankful for Juyeon’s excitement and obliviousness (surprising) to the reunion he just set up; the tension wore off Changmin’s shoulder and your pigments returned. 

All would rotate between the two sides of the net. You would purse lips to a thin line and turn the plastic of your shoes on the hard floor before running up to Changmin to show him how to serve. At first you stood a little less than a meter behind him; shoved gestures in the air to somehow manipulate his own body to do the same movements. But at last you went up to him, held his hand like gentle rain. 

There was not a bruise or patterns of shades on his palms. Either he’s absolutely addicted to hand cream or those text books of his must enchant his skin while turning pages. 

Changmin felt fragile like all ancient history when you showed him. He tried to be quiet, shyly only talking to Juyeon, but couldn’t help but let out shrieks every time he missed or won. It was just like board games at the dinner table when their parents whispered in the other room. 

You suddenly shout, “Move!” 

Juyeon’s on the opposite side of the two and forced the ball up to the roof with neck breaking power. 

You see how Changmin doesn’t; instead glued to the floor with knees rigid and his hands come up in chest length as if it will save him. You desperately swing your shoulder to the right, but all actions are in vain when their foreheads collide. Force acts up on them and leads them to the ground. Swear it was visible stars circling both heads. 

As the collision wears off and presence hits you as a second impact; terrified you watch Changmin between own two arms down the floor. Legs have his stomach tied to the flooring; 

where in all directions you are. And when they both blushes of embarrassment; Changmin’s hands come a little higher up his chest. 

“You’re supposed to chase the ball.” You stutter and hastily push up from him but miserably fails as the clothing material slips on the floor. 

“I’m sorry-” 

Changmin, just as terrified, apologizes while pushing himself off the floor. One way and two directions; they shut their eyes painfully as the point between their eyebrows hit each other again. One step further down his stomach.

“You didn’t even tell me we had started.” Changmin complains and holds his forehead, looking at Juyeon who climbs under the net. 

You slide off him; knees supporting any weight while at the end of his calves. Great silence from the tunnel system in the high ceiling expands over the yellow walls. It scratches in their throats that you cough. It was enough to crack the tension layered like a glass dome. 

“I don’t feel the same, Y/n.” Changmin sits up. 

“Yeah, I know.” You sigh because you know what he means without asking. Fingers left racing the floor.

“Old story; you were not supposed to get it, I’m sorry.” Guiltily purse lips in, “Also, sorry for falling on you.” 

Suddenly gentle, his legs come over in crisscross and he leans closer to your figure. 

“Yeah…it’s fine.” He confirms in same tone, “Though, I appreciate it. The letter.” 

He pauses. 

“...I had no idea.” Changmin admits.

You laugh, “Really? I was super obvious.” 

“You think so?” He skeptically smiles. 

To bring your arms to an imaginable table and articulate, “I literally held my arms over the textbooks to lean over to you..” 

“I just thought you were a bad listener.” Changmin smiles, bothered, like he always does.  

They both laugh. 

Another shine made by the sun outside draws with a ruler down the yellow wall. It has an angular cut in where it has a darker wooden frame just above the floor. Like the highlight is a window to the midsummers of one’s childhood; you dare to hold eyes open and watch. 

They used to sit at the dining table where the pattern cloth folds at your knees. Because you were way too shy to invite him behind your room door. Sometimes, laughs loud enough for them to hear came from the living room where both their mom’s sat. Mostly they whispered; never understood why. 

When they were younger, he was mostly intimidating. So much taller and just his glasses felt like a sign of great intelligence. But truly his personality held some sort of shine you believed was a leftover from some ancient spell along the yellow fields. 

With their families having dinner sometimes; the two of them used to play board or card games late into the afternoon when the adults still sat along the dinner table. You didn’t want to invite your brother when you finally had time to talk to Changmin without it being about math, but he was way too nice to leave him out. 

“Is your cat good?” Changmin asks suddenly, “Or is he dead?” He knits his eyebrows. 

“Yeah, he’s dead.” Smiles and thinks of how Scuba Steve, in his orange white complexion used to jump into Changmin’s lap while he was tutoring. And when he talked to him so sweetly and petted him along the long fur; her teenage self used to dream about their future (delusion). 

“It feels like he liked everyone more than me.” You admit while leaning into your palm. 

“I’m sure he liked you too.” He laughs. 

“Are you going to the beach party?” Changmin suddenly asks, “You’re close with Eric, right?” He knits his eyebrows, “Aren’t you together with Jaehyun too?” 

“No, no, no, I’m not with Jaehyun.” You fall back to the floor and hands melt down your face. 

“Don’t tell him I said that though.” You add, “But no, I’m not going.” 

“Why not?” 

Visions from the past weeks pass like a bad trailer and you close your eyes. Sunwoo and Eric run across the field in a sort of evangelical light and Hyunjae in the far corner.

You sort of lie, “It’s complicated. I don’t want to meet Eric.” 

Changmin stands up, “I’m only going if you do.” 

“Don’t do this.” You complain. 

“No, whatever’s going on, we’re fixing it now.” He takes your shoulder and forces you up. You whine again and try to make the weight fall back to Earth. 

“I’m fighting volleyball and you’re fighting Eric, great!” He cheers.

There was a lot more than Eric you had to fight this weekend. 

The ball goes flying in their direction again. It lands on Changmin’s head and forces his glasses to the floor. They both look to the right and see Juyeon stand awkwardly upright, hands hanging like leaves as he longs for the ball. 

“I missed.” He deadpan. 

You take the ball and look at Changmin. He smiles knowingly before you both rush at Juyeon. 

( friday, morning )

“Do you want some?” 

Your head turns to the right where the sun shines through the glass brighter. It ceases through the back of his loose strands like the tree crowns from summer camp. 

When you came down to the bus station, Changmin waved at you from a stack of backpacks piled like a mountain. Juyeon stood slightly behind and followed the shoerter’s movements. You asked them if they plan on moving with that; Changmin answered it was Juyeon’s and Eric’s bags. He had–while straightening his posture–just taken the necessary. 

When all had arrived, you got a third row seat at the back beside Sunwoo. You had met again on campus. It turned out between all those words that both were going to the party this weekend. You mentioned how you’re mainly here as Changmin’s emotional support.

Sunwoo– a little horrified– told you he’ll have eyes in the back of his neck for this trip. Hyunjae, Eric or anyone else for that matter could come up from behind and throw hsi poor body in the water. With both in desperate situations, they jokingly built a pact to have each other’s back on this trip. 

So when you sit beside Sunwoo, and look down the space created against the armrest where he reaches out a pink package. He shakes it and you smile before taking a hand off the backpack. 

“You stole my pocky?” 

Tearing away from that space; they look behind the red seat to see Eric leaned over the two. He pierces down at Sunwoo with a dumbfounded O of his lips and starts pointing at the roots of Sunwoo’s hair which he ducks away from. 

“I didn’t steal it.” He defends. 

“It’s mine, I bought it this morning.” Eric looks at you, begging for sympathy, “Now I have no snacks.” 

“You said you weren’t going to eat them.” Sunwoo hides them. 

“They’re mine!” Eric hangs down the seat. Immediately you take the edge of his sleeve as if he’ll fall on you. 

“You’re gonna eat them now?” Sunwoo taunts, “Take the jelly grapes.” He throws out a plastic package from his bag while still chewing. 

“Let’s split it.” Eric deadpans while holding out his palm. 

“I’ll buy you one later.” Sunwoo repeat. 

Eric laughs from above, “You literally just asked Y/n!” He points. 

Sunwoo gets quiet for a second; looks up et Eric, before back at Y/n. 

“Can’t you just eat the grapes?” He shakes the package up in Eric’s face. 

Feet fall back to the floor, the row behind them and Eric, still dumbfounded, points at Sunwoo while stunned searches for assent in you. 

“He’s shameless.” Eric sits down. 

Where the dense complexes only ends when shore starts, the bus ride isn’t long. Despite constant traffic, conversations over the unconscious roaring of the bus engine; you resisted the falling weight of eyelids but at last, gave in. The last minutes when blue hues start to form between the windows and houses lined up against the sand. Head falls onto Sunwoo’s shoulder. 

Changes surprises him, but just as immediately he gently falls back into his seat and your head comes between his neck like the last piece of a 100 puzzle. How could he describe the violent but gentle flutter that grows from a part in his chest and blooms into all directions. And when each stem leaves its youth and creates rosen petals at his fingertips; the playlist in his headphones changes song. 

A melody of 80s slow paced rhythm and a voice soft like silk; lies over the muted woven chorals and yellow of the beach houses. Tiny flowers in perfect composition, like a trail across each street and when he sees the roof of the largest beach houses, just below the shore; Sunwoo wishes the bus would take one more round. 

He dares to look down.  He has seen this image before. All those movie nights in the dining room at summer camp evening. When he rushed to take the seat beside you before anyone else. And towards the end of the long hour you couldn’t keep your eyes open and leaned just like now, on his shoulder. It’s been so long but it doesn’t feel like a season has passed since that summer when he sees your hand lightly touching his own. 

“You need sunscreen, Jaehyun!” You wave the blue plastic tube while slipping down the sand. Hyunjae looks over his shoulder, smirking questionably to her while you come closer. 

“You’ll get skin cancer.” You squint when the blue sky shines behind him. 

“You do it then.” He smiles. 

Holding hands above your eyes, hoping it’ll cease all rosen blushes, “I’m not your mom.” 

“Please, Y/n.” He shakes your forearms, pouting. At first your own hands come up to his chest to force him off, but retrites like touching a hot stove as he’s shirtless. 

“Okay, okay.”

Overarching sand, up to the wooden porch, frees from the rest when they walk up. Hyunjae quickly takes the lead when he jumps up on fixed ground and takes a seat on the edge of the porch. How he wiggle his legs like an excited child while smiling so brightly; you didn’t know he could. You fall to knees behind him and awkwardly look over his hair. 

“Can’t you just do it yourself?” Sun highlights his skin from above. The sharp points of his shoulders, down to his arms, seem soothing against the sharp sand. That specific smell of sunscreen, so deeply ingrained into summer, trace along the porch. Your palm hesitantly moves back and forth between the flexed spot of his shoulder. 

“Just do it, Angel.” Hyunjae looks back at you encouragingly, but you quickly lie the cold sunscreen on his skin to divert him. In the clear summer sun spotlight, your cheeks luminates of struck pink. 

“Ah, it’s cold.” Hyunjae’s shoulder rises up and you continue soothing it in one hand. 

“Don’t complain.” You try to sound normal. 

They got along more than you originally thought. Hesitant to calling people friends, but you guess that's what they are. Though, friends shouldn’t blush of nervousness from innocent touch, right? Especially when Hyunjae leans back further into your hand, and you wonder if it’s wrong. 

At the same time; Eric peeks from the doors to the beach house. He tries to convince himself he’s longingly looking at the open shore, but it’s merely a background to Hyunjae and you.

It’s not that you’re lying, he thinks. You looked more than authentic that day, he asked if they were together and you denied. It’s not a competition, but still he feels a burn coming from another direction than the sun when your hands go to his neck and Hyunjae laughs from tickling. 

“Y/n!” 

You turn from Hyunjae and see Eric coming closer. All that in one motion, you forgot about the painfully obvious red of your face. It isn’t until Eric’s eyes widens and he falls in height to take your left cheek. 

“You’ve burned yourself, Y/n.” Eric traces with his thumb the rose colors of your essence and  to feel it coming off your skin, embarrassingly paint your soul. At this point,  nervousness would leak out from your skin, but by Eric’s and Hyunjae’s wide eyes and open mouths; they’re completely oblivious to their work. 

“N-” Stuttering out the beginning of a no; you stop suddenly as there’s no good excuse for the color. 

“Let me help you.” Hyunjae reaches for the tube down the wood and you immediately try back from Eric’s gentle palms. 

“No, no, no, it’s just heat.” 

“Water.” Eric wants to get you on foot, take you to the kitchen. 

“You need a cold bath.” Hyunjae says quickly after and without looking at Eric takes you in bridal style. Hand lets go of Eric’s and he’s left standing as you in panic tries to convince Hyunjae to turn away from shore. Hyunjae laughs while shouting that you’ll overheat.

It’s a dark seemingly normal, but guilty jealousy Eric watches the older one throw his best friend down the water. You’re quick on your feet again, and start chasing Hyunjae further down. Laughs come from that side while Eric tears his eyes off the new waves; clench his fist because frustration might visibly leak out his skin, and turn back to the house to take his mind off. 

It was only a limited amount of sups, you shared one with Changmin. They had agreed to alt the paddle in interval, but it was you who ended up dragging them both along the surface while Chnagmin sat behind, criticizing the solo sups. 

His victim was mainly Juyeon who traversed the first ocean layer for a good minute playing God until he lost balance. The entire group laughed while he tried to climb up. At the same time Sunwoo laughed so hard he was second to fall in. 

Changmin did well, all things considered, when it was beach volleyball. Juyeon and you cheered on him. That brought him enough confidence to stand at the front. Which wasn’t his greatest moment as he fell head first into the net. 

Sun’s, fleetly asleep above the horizon. All those hours of shine still left like a memory in the sand while four of them still play, the rest swimming, taken a seat with the group who grills or in the house. Laughter with the waves collide, creating a divide of foam. Breeze ensues their hearts. 

It smells of garlic smoked marinade from behind once the ball comes over again. Though at first refusing to go, you’re still thankful for Changmin who desperately forced a game over either way. 

Soon there’s food and you sit on the porch once again. Sunset like a filter over the shore and its houses, maybe the heart too. 

“I have some for you.” 

You look up at who you thought was Eric, with a brightly printed paper plate, gathered of the same choices since childhood. But you blink once, realize it’s Sunwoo. He takes the space beside where only vague music accompanied earlier. 

“Oh, thank you, Sunwoo.” You smile and take the second plate. 

“No worries.” He bends down to eat a bite of his own food. 

A scenery in fleeting composition, scattered of dust passes through the peripheral. 

“I remember you used to take food to me back then too.” Unconscious of the tender light you hold while tracing the oil leaking across plastic shine. 

“Yeah,” He looks at his chicken, “Cause you were always busy sorting stones.” 

You scoff, “Why? You’re judging my hobbies?” 

“No,” He answer truthfully, “It was cute.” 

“My stones?” You tilt. 

“You.” 

Sunwoo’s voice is monotone like it wasn’t supposed to blemish your heart like the orange and dark blue sky divide. The bones across your shoulders and hover over chest convulse in like wings of the delighting butterflies. 

Sunwoo looks up from the food, “I don’t really remember how your stones looked.” 

You smile and take a bite, “I guess that’s why I married you back then.” 

Still confined between your own frame to prevent any sheer wings of escape; you miss how his ears perked up together with his horrible posture. Him in his sharp complexion becomes adorably curious. 

“You remember that?” He says surprised. 

“Of course.” She says as if it’s obvious. Sunwoo looks down at the sand as if to see the smitten reflection of his face in them. 

“I actually didn’t think you’d remember.” He says quietly. 

Another song on the playlist comes on and a group of people rush beside them. Jumping off the porch; their silhouettes darken in pink contrast as water evaporates on their burnt arms. 

Sunwoo dares to look to your side; still eating and it further reminds him of times in circles when they sat next to each other. Something absurd with seeing you again like this. For some nameless reason you have lived all these years as a little girl in his memories, constantly visiting when summer’s approaching. Now you're here, finally at the same age. 

He knows he shouldn’t advance, shouldn’t take a step closer on the porch. Since behind him just some meters further, Hyunjae sits. How adoringly he thinks of Hyunjae because he has you unconditionally by one side. 

“I remember you told me about the stars.” You suddenly say. 

Sunwoo looks at you then the skies, vaguely guilty that there's nothing's left to see yet.

He smiles,  “Damn, I can’t see them, otherwise I would’ve told you about them again.”

You hold head tilted at his side while his eyes still squint for a light away to hit them, “You can show me later.” 

 You don't know what has crawled into you lately, but it’s dependent and has zero abstinence. 

As if the hangover from last week wasn’t enough to convince you; you’re drunk once again (this time in the kitchen). Juyeon worriedly came over, asking if you’re always this bad with alcohol. In turn you took his shoulders dramatically and said no, shaking him. 

And you weren't the only one. In the same vein, at another window by the house; Eric found Sunwoo staring dead into the reflection. When asked what he was doing, Sunwoo simply replied he’s staring at bird shit and laughing like it was the funniest thing. 

Most people are still outside. Fairy lights might look like fireflies in this state as it cradles lightly from night weather. As people cross the sand it changes patterns. It lays a plastic cup further away which Eric runs to pick up. You don't know what song is playing when the high frame expands as walls in all directions, but you think it’s good. 

“Can you dance?” You look at Sunwoo. He turns confusingly with bad posture from the bird shit. An awkward beat drop passage muffled by the walls takes the silence. 

Suddenly you jump up to him in another rhythm than the beat. Smiles wholeheartedly while waving arms.

“I can’t.” You answer your own questions and do a spin. 

Sunwoo’s hangs down its sides like towels over the branches. You reflect in highlights by his porcelain eyes. He must look extremely out of it as the pupils can’t concentrate on the shifting lights and his amused smile. But you couldn’t tell. 

You force his tired arms up in an awkward rocking-back-and-forth swing. He laughs that his teeth show when you start complaining how he’s stiffer than the expensive couch behind them. 

“Let’s tango.” You take his arms and they start circling around the room with either hand on their shoulders and next in each other’s clasp, straight forward. Sunwoo’s laugh overpowers the music as they nearly collide with the couch. Through the window frame they must look like a middle school couple. 

And as if galactic alignment was truly divine; the next song on the playlist slows to a vintage soundtrack as if from an old romcom. They’re still laughing when the circles haste and all weight stills on the carpet lining. 

They’re so drunk, Sunwoo can’t hold himself when your face comes so close. 

“You know…” He starts. 

“No.” You deadpan.

“Don’t speak.” Sunwoo complains and you fall one step backwards from laughing. 

“You know, we’ve reached our 11th marriage anniversary.” He smiles drunkenly, “I think I deserve a kiss for surviving our long distance.” 

“You haven’t even shown me the stars yet.” You whine and curl his hand in a weird way. 

“I know, I know.” He screws his eyes, it looks like it hurts.

“Just give me a kiss and we’ll go outside.” He purses his lips out. 

“Can you even name the constellations still?” You knit your eyes. 

“Of course, there’s Little bear.” Sunwoo points at your nose. You contract your head and watch his finger tip with big eyes. 

“I’m actually a Capricorn.” 

Sunwoo’s lips curve harder as his head falls between the space created from their chests. You watch the root pattern of his hair before he comes up again. 

“You’re really cute.” He smiles. 

You can’t help clasp his hands and twine fingers even harder, “Really?” 

He nods that his fringe follows. 

“Am I cute too?” Sunwoo asks, leaning in.

You think, rolling your eyes slowly, “No.” 

He pouts with big eyes. 

“Again,” He flicks your nose lightly. 

“Me or the flowers?” Sunwoo points at a vase beside the couch. You turn over your shoulder to see the arrangement of pink blemishes with white roots. 

You pretend to think, “Hmm.” 

There’s a anticipation like a butterfly on the last leaf, flickering its sheer patterned wings before taking off. Just like that, it pulses of thousand wings in both your hearts. All as Sunwoo lean in closer. Fingers laced through the other like silk and he pulls you closer by them. When the heat accumulated in the chests collide, with your lips merely touching his own. The tension weighs heavy, it might impend on the room. 

The door from the kitchen beside them forces open. 

Both Sunwoo and you loosen the lace and throw yourself onto the couch. A painful thud erupts from the back rest when Sunwoo crashes nape first. Your condition is in dangerous state, therefore you land about 10 centimeters too short and glide off the couch to the floor. 

When the outer door closes and Eric passes by the frame, he sees Sunwoo decked out; arms hanging lifelessly and his mouth opened, supported by the backrest. 

The cup in his hand nearly topples over when he rushes to stand it on any flat surface. It pulses through the floor when Eric comes down to you. A cold hand from all the ice soothes your forehead and you look up to see Eric’s fringe like a sheer curtain before his eyes. 

“You’re okay?” He asks worriedly, “How much have you drunk?” 

Eric takes your arm and scolds you gently. As you stand up you incoherently try to defend yourself, but quit abruptly as Sunwoo comes into the story. 

Eric guided you up to the bedroom’s at second floor, leaving Sunwoo to die. 

“Eric?” You lie down. 

“Mm?” He flatten out the sheet above you. 

“I forgot.” 

Eric snorts, “Really?” 

“Mm.” You insist. 

Two essence divided between the mattress line in the mit; still staring at the same ceiling. Eric never leaves your side; instead insists on talking about nothing and everything while time wraps in a 4th dimension of one's mind until you can’t rhetorically answer “Mm?”. 

Eric finally ceases to babble when shifting his head to your side. The pillows bud like a flower on his cheek when his body completely draws to your field. He knows you will probably feel like shit tomorrow morning, but for now you lie neatly above the creases like white flower of a heaven’s cross field. 

The incredible magnetic field of your essence seems to draw in more admirers than just himself, Eric understands. He barely convinces himself that the letter is an eventual sign of their destined love, but just barely. 

I can’t know who you dream about as you sleep soundly right now, he thinks while admiring. A face or two flashes before him and Eric sits up. Quietly look at the framed picture on the wall before back down at you. 

For now, he’s in denial. 

Eric takes one hand off your side to lay on your stomach. His bare fingertips dare to soothe out nothing’s on the cheek just to feel your warmth. He hesitates for a second, but before fully walking off the bed and closing the door; he bends down to kiss your cheek, just gently. 

06 . CHAPTER SIX 

( monday, midday )

The day has finally come–or not come as in an anticipated date set in stone from the past–rather Hyunjae woke up and felt courage. The last weeks they’ve seen each other nearly every afternoon, and for each time he imagines himself having persuaded you a little closer. And the last beach party seems to have been the silver lining for his confidence to finally confess how he feels. 

This afternoon they will meet on the track field for some regular training, but what you don't know is that he will be asking you to be his girlfriend, seriously this time. 

Though, between the lecture times, staring at strangers from the row tables; he consciously realized he doesn’t quite know what you like. Or of course, he knows you like astrology, biology, cat’s, exercising but just enough that you can walk guilt free home to the bed. That you always walk around with a first aid kit, and like a mother bandage burnt skin or wrecked ankles. 

But none of that is of use when your heart is supposed to flutter at his mere sight this afternoon. 

So at a table in the cafeteria; Hyunjae takes the opposite chair of a round table where Eric sits alone. Enticed in his own world; he jumps when the chair creaks of his weight. 

Hyunjae figured it was just to ask Eric, your best friend for advice. The older may stand a ruler inferior in emotion to Eric than Juyeon, but nonetheless they have spent many house parties together, jumping off the high roof or throwing pillows at the third. 

Eric always looks at him with a smile, nearly identical to his own. But right now, the red blisters' contours wave lower than what it usually does. His eyes adverts between the sad glass divide over the sandwiches and Hyunjae. But the older forces it in an identical manner to the left. 

Eric nonchalantly told him he doesn’t know what you would romantically like from him. Hyunjae complained saying he should know since they’re best friends, but Eric reiterates his line, “Yeah, just friends.” 

Hyunjae doesn’t cease from the chair, neither his voice. Eric looks at the sandwiches again and guilty bruises his fingers underneath the table. In Eric’s eyes; Hyunjae could win over anyone by just slowly articulate every crook of their name. 

It’s not to admit that he’s threatened, Eric thinks. To rationalize the frustration he theorize Hyunjae hasn’t taken enough of a time to get to know you. 

Eric’s never been evil. His moral compass holds him on the sane lane; even when emotions begs to pull the other way. But right now, while in silence, the magnetic field of the Earth pulls on the arrows. 

“Okay.” Eric puts down the drink. Hyunjae leans in attentively. 

“She wants a big, HUUGE confession. You know, those in rom coms where the guy comes out with a huge boombox and gives her flowers and has a big sign.” Eric takes his arms up in the, above his chest in height with his hair. To visually stun him he waves his hands down like confetti and shakes a hypothetical boombox. All while Hyunjae’s expression all visually gets more nervous.

“Okay.” He walks up without looking at Eric. Head deep down the floor as if thinking. 

( monday, afternoon )

The white streaks wrapped as a present lining across the field is the same as every time he walks past. But even when the scenery is familiar to his conscious, the heart anxiously breathes in quick patterns. It causes invincible scratches at the inner side of his hands while his eyes can’t hold a scene for longer than a second. There’s a couple walking past the fields down the west campus; Hyunjae’s head follows them until their backs are a mere blemish along the sidewalk. 

With his hand tightly knitted behind his back he looks at the grass growing up from under his shoes. Suddenly he looks up again. 

Like the world just ended; the sun’s growing, tearing all the accessible and it rounds the golden halo. You’re just left in trance watching how it all beautifully collapses. That’s what your presence does to his troubled heart when your upper body comes up the staircase. 

You wave with your free hand as you see him at the center of the rectangular land. Hyunjae doesn’t mirror it, instead refuses to change any position. You tilt your head in wonder for a moment, but nonetheless carry on towards his figure, until there’s just a meter across. 

“Hi, Jaehyun.” You say gently. 

“Hi, Y/n.” He shifts his head so that a part of hsi fringe falls forward. 

You turn to see his side profile, as if he’s sick. With concerned woven shape of your face, you ask, “Are you okay?” 

An awkward tenderness in his fronting psyche. To touch his shoulder might cause it to splinter in its frozen preserved state. Hyunjae clasps his hands that’s still behind; gaze your face as if though you were the first he’s ever seen. 

Silence insists to frustratingly exist after your question. 

When a scene of the entire world, flipped in your eye; he breathes in and falls with one to the grass. His hand trails as if cold to the pocket and takes out his phone, turning the speaker outlet in your higher direction. 

“Will you make me the happiest man in the world, Y/n?” 

A bouquet in pastel silk tightly concealed in a ribbon of a darker shade. 

“Hold on.” Hyunjae drops the mobile to the ground; the music practically disappears as it swallows by the grass. 

All eyes on the thin space of his front pocket as he struggles to let loose the bits of red paper. At last some gather in his palm and he throws it up in the air as enthusiastically one can without a canon. The flowers now fully extended as the last bits of craft paper adorn his head. 

A sore spot on his left knee aches under this weight. The teeth of his smile, slowly together as he bear witness to your expression, blinking cause your lips are opened but stunned. Though he can’t read good or horrible. As he starts tilting from instability he clenches the flowers tightly. 

“I didn’t find a boombox, and the party store was closed.” Hyunjae looks behind you instead of up. Embarrassingly wonder if you would have wanted a grand confession in the college cafeteria. He won’t say it, but in all honesty he didn’t have the guts for that. 

It feels like you’ve seen this scene before; in some movie lost to time, you’re sure it has crossed you once. The sad petals taken by the wind, fallen on his shoulders or thread beneath your feet. But still might be the most soft of all thousand interactions of your life. 

Hyunjae seems embarrassed, you can’t fully tell; he looks at you from passages but sways towards the right at the end. How the past and present crashes at once to see him fully and clearly without cover. He’s such a vision that this should flutter all the lonely parts in the arch marrow body, but nothing goes off. 

It’s like standing on the fourth of may, but no fireworks light up. 

You finally smile gently, still eyes on Hyunjae. His expression waits for even a whisper, but instead a hand crosses between the fragile space. Yours takes his wrists, behind where the fingers cross the stems. Gently tugging him up from the grass as the last bits of paper rock down his shoulders. 

“It’s really lovely, Jaehyun.” You smile and he’s finally up. 

The space opens again. 

“But I can’t.” You look at him as both lips synchronize withers. 

“I’m sorry.” 

A heavy wind brushes past; lies a weight on your hearts. Hyunjae, who has never once been the one pushed away, hears lone footsteps echo in the boned structure. It’s a bit embarrassing, it’s a bit sad; he feels like he maybe shouldn’t have said anything. 

You see in full vision how his mind travels elsewhere. Still with flowers and the barely audible mobile that now has changed track to a mellow love song of 80s nostalgia. How depressing everything suddenly became. 

“I still like you, Jaehyun,” You break the silence, “You were honestly a lot nicer than I originally thought.” 

He looks up. 

You smile weakly, “When I saw you on campus I thought you flirted with every woman and acted all big.” You gesture with your shoulders and Hyunjae laughs slightly. 

“But you’re actually very kind.” 

He reaches out the flowers once again. You look up at him with eyes, x-ed expression. 

“It’s still your flowers, I want you to have them.” He says gently. 

You hesitate but he shakes them in front of you. Once loosen on the tensioned shoulders; you take one hand out for the stems and look at them closely. Deeply pink with faded inner circles. 

( wednesday, afternoon ) 

That table at the cafeteria where they always meet has been occupied two days in a row. You come by between classes and yearn through the window, but at last; there’s always a shirt in a color Eric wouldn’t wear sitting in his place. 

At the changing distance through the evening, at the lone table beside your bed; all those papers in painful yellow highlight, tire sore eyes and vision yearns for the computer at the other side. Watch the letter box they communicate through everyday, but is now quiet. 

You’ve messaged Sunwoo through facebook; asked him why Eric ceased from Earth. He answered through digital letters that he’s busy, but truthfully Sunwoo knows better than anyone Eric scatters to avoid you. Eric won’t fully admit why; the closest to a confession Sunwoo got was a bleak understanding of inner guilt over something. 

“You’re sad.” 

You turn to the left where Juyeon sits with curious eyes before the library shelves. Side by side at the communal computers; he has watched you stare at the search page for four minutes without intervention. 

“Do you want to go and see the cats?” He asks gently. 

You sink down on the table. Hands curl up at the keyboard while the wooden surface catches your chin. 

“No, but thank you, Juyeon.” You say tired. 

“Is it Eric?” He asks, leaning down. 

You nod. 

“I don’t want to hurt him, I’m afraid we won’t be friends anymore.” You pause, “I don’t want to hurt anyone else.” 

“You should tell him that.” Changmin peaks from behind the computer, opposite you and Juyeon. 

“Honesty is always valued.” 

“You know, whatever it is..” Juyeon speaks from the right side, “at least having it said will lift the weight off. You have an assignment next week, right?” Juyeon points at the screen. 

“Eric would make fun of you for worrying about boys instead of studying.” 

You smile weakly. 

07 . FINAL CHAPTER 

( saturday, evening ) 

Edges of sharp stone scratches against your old bicycle. Those few streetlights with meters in between emits across the gravel. On the path from your old house, it was quiet like it always is in family neighbourhoods. But as you come closer to Eric’s old house; ruptures in form of music and laughter leak out the open windows. 

You had to stay longer in the library working. Time passed like it never does when one’s bored, and suddenly you had missed the first train and waited for the other. It isn’t too far out your old neighbourhood, just a few stations that with each passing minute gets dimmer and dimmer because of lack of lining lamps. 

Running the last passage to your front door to take the bike, and now you’re standing at his post. The same sign that hangs on the door, rusted of all year’s weather, intimidates you serenely. 

At last, with one foot you force down the supporting metal where all other bikes stand. Close eyes on the handle while the laughter is still muted. 

It has never felt so hard knocking on his door. 

The blurred window at the roof of the door; you stare at it when finally knocking. Anticipation hugs your knees painfully as you take a step back. Look at all places except the white door. Drag your hands along the clothing fabrics as if it’ll obscure you. 

Speakers frees from the door while you feel like running towards the woods. 

“Welcome in!” 

You don't recognize the man holding this door you’ve walked through since five. His expression contrasts your neutral one. There’s a red cup in his hand, he asks if you want some; you thank him, but reject. 

As you come in line with each other through the hallway with mountains of shoes, you look at his back, insecure, before speaking. 

“Do you know where Eric is?” 

He turns, “Hmm..” Scratching his nape and leaning toward the opening frames of all the different rooms. 

“I think he’s in the living room?” The guy points further into the apartment, you thank him. 

Despite all open windows and meters of space; the air is horribly suffocating. People sit two and two, talk in five’s, and a path like pattern goes through the crowd. You let it take you, hoping it somehow brings you to Eric. 

Your feet, that still have shoes on, cease to motion diagonally towards a large couch group. Between all those mere strange faces you’ve may seen once; a face so deeply dissected and remade sits in between. He’s at the center like the sun itself, and people gravitate towards him. 

Somehow you would go back to your corner, sink down quietly. But you’ve been running for too long. Hand behind your back, wrists rope tied while your conscious threats to slaughter from behind, push you forward. 

“Eric?” You say above the laughter, and his couch group turns towards you. 

You swallow when his expression changes to something calmly unreadable, “I need to talk to you.” 

A filter falls like a sheer cover of snow when he closes the door. They’re alone behind the house, blue illumination like an upside down universe highlights you from below. Neither Eric or you had said something, but it wasn’t noticeable until the world ran out of sound too. 

Eric’s silhouette leaves your side and sits by the edge of the pool. With his barefoots into the galactic mirror, his face shades and colors like the moon. You too walk to the edge, sit by his side and see his legs make waves throughout the water. 

He’s unfamiliarly quiet; similar to when you know something someone else doesn’t. 

“I think I like someone, Eric.” You say gently without wasting. 

He looks at you, soft and tender, “You do?” He smiles. 

You smile too and nod. 

His feet make water soar before becoming whole again. Your fingers tear at the concrete lining the pool. 

“...and I’m not sure he likes me back…therefore it can’t be you.” 

Heavy silence like the Universe itself weighs over them. World’s full of life, yet there’s an empty echo in the marrow arch of your cathedral body. 

Eric gazes at the transparent surface of the water, smiling weakly because it’s the only thing right to do.

“Though, I still love you, Eric.” You lean towards his shoulder. Tear his side profile like you beg it is not the last time you see it. 

“So much as you can possibly love someone, and a little more.” 

He looks up, fringe falling, “It’s okay, I know.” 

Voice fragile, so heartbreaking against the smile that could light up the entirety of the solar system. He’s like the pool beneath, a galactic universe tightly compacted into a pond. 

His mere existence makes your eyes glisten and words frail, “I’m sorry.” You whisper.

He smiles and takes your wrist, “Why are you saying sorry, princess.” 

They both sit there for a moment. The constellations pass a centimeter above the bended celestial before you walk up. Half disappear behind the wall while Eric is left at the pool edge. You can’t bring yourself to leave; having one eye on his back as if it'll fall when you go. 

Eric looks back to your wall suddenly, like he knows. 

“I’m sorry.” You say it again, nails exhaustingly tearing at the house. 

Eric shakes his head, waving you off gently before speaking quietly, “Go get your prince.” 

Stones shatter beneath the weight of two tires. All houses are drowned in nightshade glistens of warm lighted windows like the stars above, that is childhood. 

Grass divided into squares lined with fences; streamline, down the gravel path until it opens up in a wide circle. You know this place because here’s where everyone always met. 

All those gravel paths, identical to the one you just left maze down to a grass circle. The very heart of all these houses, a meter lower than the rest. You pass the path contouring it and all these strokes of green nature hinders you down. You stop with one foot off the pedal and lean your weight while standing up. 

Where all distance creates a perfect cross; a boy much familiar to you lies. His own bicycle stranded a meter or two from his still body. Laying on his back with his head tilted on its forearms. Sunwoo’s completely still like midnight around him. It calms you just how water drains from head down after sunshine, but heart tears at its veins. 

You found him. 

To let go of the bicycle; forcing down the metal to leave it standing. Eventually you walk towards him, slowly as if you’ll scare him away. 

About three meters from his feet; Sunwoo suddenly looks away from the star fields and up to you. 

“Oh, hi Y/n.” He says like he always does. 

You cease to stop, “Hi, Sunwoo.” 

He can’t quite place why you’re here. You seem to come up in unexpected moments; take him by heart like a sudden season though he’s been admiring the trees for an eternity. It begins with your hair; how it seemingly floods down on your shoulders. Just like the jewel reflection like glitter under your eyes . 

“You’re crying?”

You’re taken back by his question; taking a hand to the cold skin beneath your vision. Liquid dried tight to your complexion.  

“It’s a long story,” You stutter; head turns to the ground before your expression becomes decrepit, but poetical. 

“I’ll tell you later.” 

After silence, you sigh; lending a bit of your worry to Earth. All the heavy mountains, all heavy oceans.

You start, “I have something to tell you.” 

Grass stands in between his fingers when they lie flat against the ground. Sunwoo forces himself up while observing your expression. You neither walk closer or further; chin falling in patterns as pupils pierce onto the sight behind him or the grass beneath his feet. Only in mere passages eye contact lasts. 

You open your mouth to speak, but realize you have a bad habit of coating everything in a thin layer of sugar as if feeding your words to a child. But there’s a certain bitter aftertaste in being honest. 

“I love you, Sunwoo.” The words free from a deep part within. Tears off the inner skin and momentarily aches the body cathedral. He doesn’t say anything. Sitting in place, whether it’s of shock or horror, one can’t tell. To expand the details of his expression, but there’s always two possibilities to his wide eyes and space between lips. Hurriedly you continue. 

“I really like you Sunwoo, I’m sorry.” You look down to the left, “I just needed to say it.” You open your arms, not like a hug, rather an impediment. 

“So do what you want, Sunwoo.” You breathe in heavily while searching for the world reflected in his window. 

“Just break my heart if that’s what you have to, please, just–” 

“I love you too.” 

“...do–what?” Your arms fall to their sides and the pupil without dimensions expands across the pearl, reaching the far edge of its colorization. 

“I love you too.” He stutters more this time. 

Every cosmic mass bulging on your shoulders and tearing your back convulses from behind. It like everything eventually does; changes form and frees for the roof without limit. It has compressed your lungs into tiny pulses, you didn’t even notice. Yet the milky way’s worth of celestial bodies frees from you; only eyelids show movement. 

You breathe heavily while looking at Sunwoo with parted lips. He looks just as cosmically affected as you. 

“But aren’t you together with Jaehyun?” He suddenly says. 

You’re quiet for a second before bursting out in laughter. 

“No…no.” You take your hands up before your chest and smile “You’re still there?” 

Sunwoo’s still crossed brow of confusion. Neither laughing nor speaking. 

“I was his fake girlfriend for the parties, but we’re not like that.” 

You pause. 

“We could never be like that…” You hold your arms behind your back, titling your head when a star aligns with his position. 

“Not when you exist.” 

He admires you deeply in the same way, one layer below. Knees have come up to his chin and he hugs them slightly while hypnotized following the last season’s breeze across your face. 

You’re not sure what is supposed to happen now. But truthfully, you could live adoring the opposite like this for an eternity longer. 

Though, Sunwoo has other plans. 

The surface of his shoes bend down the grass as he stands. The last meters dying to collapse cease from existence; all before you even lift your head from your shoulder. Just as your eyes widen he’s against you gently. Sheer touch of his fingers across your lower face before he tilts. At last you touch and love-soul bitten sensations fill two hearts. 

You look at him again after the kiss; his face so beautiful you believe he could overthrow the world. 

© littleroaes, written and all

a/ n : i kind of broke my own heart by writing reader and juyeon just being friends 😭 it took all my will power

love spectrum spoiler

have flirty/ cute dynamic in the beginning but becomes friends : juyeon, changmin

romantic storylines but do not end up with : eric, hyunjae

end game : sunwoo

tagging : @darcymariebraun-blog @sungbeam @tbzhub @sanaxo-o

[blizzardfluffykpop]

Under the Glow of Candlelight

Summary: At your usual best friend sleepovers, you started talking about your unsatisfying exes, one thing leads to another. And soon you’re on top of your best friend, under the glow of candle lights. 

Oneshot

Smut, PW?P, Fluff?, Best friends to *official* lovers

If you are a minor, please do not read/engage with this post. This is an 18+ work. 

Warnings: Unprotected Sex (pls practice safe sex), Soft dom! Juyeon, Cowgirl position, Body Worship, Marking (m! & f! receiving), Slight Possessiveness, Tit-sucking & fondling (f! receiving), Praise, One (1) ass smack (f! receiving), Creampie, Candles lit and glowing (no candle/temperature/wax play), Talking about previous partners & positions, Mentions of prev. talks about masturbation, *Aftercare*, Use of pet names: Princess, Baby, and Sweetheart *And if I missed any pls lmk!*

Word Count: 2,739

Juyeon X Fem!Reader 

Again, if you are a minor, please do not read/engage with this post. This is an 18+ work. 

------

Juyeon, above all, was your best friend, so telling him exactly how you liked to be fucked didn’t seem out of the blue. After all, the two of you had talked about how you masturbated before. Why would this be any different? “Yeah, remember my last boyfriend?” He hums, “Yeah, he was kind of boring.” You groan, sitting upside down and looking up at the ceiling, “And god, he was boring in bed too.” He lets out a soft laugh, as you tell him, finally looking over at him, “I just like it when someone’s rougher and can take me like they own me y’know?” He nods, “Yeah, rougher is more fun. But you? Of all people- Want someone to act like they own you?” You laugh, “It’s kind of funny when you put it that way. But I just want them to be in charge.” His mouth is ajar as he nods, “That makes more sense.” You hum, and he asks, “Then what’s your favorite position?” You grin, “Guess.” And you watch as he thinks before he answers, “I don’t know, cowgirl?” You gasp, “How’d you know?” He shrugs, “I’ve known you since we were little. You always like to look like you’re in charge… And well, with you saying you want someone to actually be in charge… It just made sense.” You laugh, “Well, what about you?” He shrugs, “I think you already know…” You gasp, “No way…” His smile turns into a smirk as he does, “You know I’m a sucker for being underneath. You get so much more access that way… I can control the pace and suck on some pretty tits? Princess, that’s the dream…” You laugh, “I can’t believe we like the same position for different reasons.” He tilts his head at you, “You can’t?” 

You shrug, finally flipping to be right-side up on his couch, “I don’t know, I always pictured you as an ass guy so-” He shakes his head as he shoves your shoulder, and you fall over teasingly before getting back up, “I am. But that’s why it’s one of the best positions. I get to have a handful of it as I take control.” You let out an ‘ahh’ as it makes sense to you. And you ask, “What was your last girlfriend like… What was her name? Jen? Jennet?” “You mean Jeanie?” You nod, and he groans, “Ugh, she only liked me to hit it from the back, and it had to be in total darkness… And as much as that’s nice… I love seeing someone come undone for me.” You tilt your head, “You like to fuck with the overhead lights on, or?” He shrugs, “At least candles…” You push his shoulder, “Ohh, so romantic.” He rolls his eyes, “What? A little romance is boring for you?” And you shrug, fiddling with your pajama shorts, “Never had the opportunity to fuck with them lit.” He shakes his head, “You don’t fuck with candles on-” “Don’t you dare-” “You make love with them lit.” You groan, “Ugh… you had to say that.” He looks at you confused, “Have you never made love either?” You shrug, “I guess I’ve come close to it?” He looks at you weirdly, “What do you mean you’ve come close? I thought you loved that one girl.” You sigh, “I did- but like- I don’t know? I don’t think I’ve ever genuinely had sex to make love. It’s always been with the goal of getting off- nothing else.” Juyeon shakes his head, “Now who’s the boring one, baby?” You roll your eyes, “I was shedding my heart to you, and here you are-” He cuts you off, “Well, have you ever wanted to?” You think back to all your exes, “Well, yeah, I guess? I don’t know, I never really thought about it...” 

He squints at you, “Really?” You shrug and ask him, “Well, have you ever made love?” He hums, running his hand through his hair, “Most of the time. You know I’m a bit slower, and it takes me some time to catch on, right?” You nod, and he continues, “I take my time figuring out what makes them tick and it’s just a lot more intimate feeling than fucking just to get off, you know?” You sigh, “I wish I did…” And he hums, “Well, what if you could?” You look over at him, “How so?” He shrugs, “We could.” You give him an odd look, “I don’t know if we should. It’s one thing to fuck your friends. But to make love with them?” He looks into your eyes as you continue, “Isn’t that drawing the line? Aren’t you supposed to only do that with people you love?” He shrugs, “I love you a lot, doesn’t that count?” You look at him, “I mean... I love you too, but I don’t know if we should make love. Because wouldn’t that make us more than we are?” He shrugs, “I don’t know, only one way to find out though… Of course, if you want to, it's on the table. If not, we can forget it and just continue talking about our unsatisfying exes.” You hum and think about it. On one hand, you could be ruining a friendship you’ve cherished for years. On the other hand, you could be starting a new forever with him. And you kind of like that thought. 

So, you shrug, “Why not?” He smiles as he goes, “Let’s go to my room.” You nod, and he leads you down the hall to his room. He opens the door, lets you in, and gestures for you to sit on his bed. “One second.” You get comfy laying there watching him find his lighter and arrange the candles in his room before lighting them one at a time. He puts the lighter down before turning off the overhead light, and the candles cast a soft amber glow over the room, “Woah…” He smiles, “Beautiful, right?” You hum in agreement and whisper as he walks towards you, “I don’t know how anyone would pass this up.” He shrugs, unsure as to why, either. As he crawls over you, he asks, “Can I kiss you?” You nod, and he leans over you and gives you a second to back away and back out before he kisses you. 

You sigh when he pulls away. It finally feels like the pieces are coming together. His hand slowly moves up your shirt, and you ask, “Are we really going to do this?” He looks into your eyes, “Not if you don’t want to.” You shake your head, “No, that’s not what I meant. I just- I love you, and I don’t know if that will change.” He kisses your forehead, “If it helps you any, it won’t make me love you any less.” You look into his eyes, “It does.” “Will you love me any less?” You shake your head, and he smiles, “Then the only thing that could change is?” You hum, wondering what he’s about to say, “We find we like having sex together, and we fall deeper for each other.” You shrug as you agree, “Yeah, I guess so.” He asks, “Will you love me any less if I don’t fuck you good?” You laugh, “Nah, I just won’t ever have sex with you again. Will you feel the same?” He smiles, “Yeah.” You nod, “Okay.” “Then it’s settled.” He pulls you in for another kiss, and you let yourself fully enjoy it. 

He pushes your shirt to the side to leave kisses along your collarbone before slowly dragging your shirt up and over your head. He smiles as he takes a moment to appreciate your chest. You blush before he sinks down and drags slow kisses along your chest, worshiping your body like it was a temple. He sucks on one of your nipples as he wraps his hand around the other, gently kneading before pulling back to suck on the other. You let out soft moans as he continues playing with your breasts. After a couple of minutes, he finally pulls away to capture your lips in his, slowly making out with you. When he pulls away this time, he gives you a quick peck before trailing his kisses down your torso. 

He lets out soft hums of appreciation as he kisses along your stomach, finally reaching the top of your pajama bottoms. He moves up, peeling them off before dragging your panties down. He lets out a content hum as he looks you fully over. “You look good like this, princess…” He gets up from the bed and takes off his clothes slowly, and you drink it in. Maybe you shouldn’t be doing this with your best friend. But it felt so right. You smile as he sits down beside you. He gently grabs your sides, lifting you up before placing you on his lap. He smiles as he tells you, “Hmm, yeah, you look like you belong here.” You blush as you look at his eyes and see them filled with adoration. It made you feel a sense of pride as you smiled, “I think I’ll look better with you in me.” He chuckles, “We’ll at least feel better.” You laugh as he lines you up, and you slowly sink down onto his cock. 

You both let out a breath when you fully sink down, making you both laugh a little. Juyeon hums, admiring you from a new angle, “God, you look so beautiful.” You blush and bury your head into his neck, littering kisses along his collar as you bounce on his lap a little bit. When you feel his hands move around your hips, before he starts bouncing you up and down, taking control over your movements, he lets out soft little groans as he works you both into a pace. You mumble against his collarbone, “You feel so good, Ju…” And he hums as you feel his hands move down along you as he changes his grip to get a better hold of you. When suddenly, he smacks your ass, and you let out a shocked moan as you look back at him. He grins as he soothes his hand over the mark he left and lets out a groan, “You have such a good ass, baby…” He picks the pace back up as you suck a hickey onto his collarbone, marking him as yours. You didn’t want him making love to anyone but you. 

He kisses your neck gently, not leaving hickeys, just kissing you like you always wished to be. He mumbles against your chest, “Fuck, I love you.” You kiss the top of his head and murmur, “I love you too.” He holds you close to him, burying his face into your chest as he thrusts up into you. You’ve never felt so close to someone before as you wrap your arms around his shoulders, resting your head on his as you both take in the moment. You pull back as he finally finds the spot that makes you moan loudly. He asks, “Right there, baby?” You let out a little noise as you try to tell him, ‘Yes’. And you see his smile grow as you let your head fall back, as he starts hitting the same spot over and over. He wraps his lips around your nipple, sucking on it as he continues his motions. With the energy you have left to talk, you ask, “Can.. can you… can you hold my hand?” He hums as he looks up at you with his mouth full before moving a hand from underneath you. He holds it out to you, and you interlock your fingers, holding his hand tightly. 

His other hand moves up, taking hold of your hip to hold you better as you hold his hand. He continues alternating between both of your breasts as he sucks and nibbles on them, littering them with marks as he does. He pulls away to capture your lips in his, and you both groan into the kiss. When he pulls away, you gasp and hold his hand together before shoving your face into his neck, “Ju… Juyeon.” He groans, “Are you close, sweetheart?” You whine and feel him smile into your collarbone, “I’ll take that as a yes.” You feel his fingers finally circle your clit, and you gasp as your legs start to shake. He whispers, “Come on, you can do it... Cum all over my cock, princess.” You cry out, and he encourages you one last time before you do. And he groans at the sight, mumbling, “You look divine…” As his hips start to stutter underneath you as he reaches his own end, squeezing your hand. 

You look down, huffing out little breaths as you both regulate your breathing. When you look back up at him, you find he’s already looking at you with a dazed smile. And he asks, “So, how was that?” You sigh heavily, “I hope we make love many more times.” His lips curl, and his eyes squint as he grins, “I hope so too, princess.” He kisses you gently. And you smile as you kiss back, finally feeling content. After a couple more minutes, when you’re both fully calm down, he pulls out, and you whine at the loss of sensation, which makes you both giggle. He kisses your nose, “That was cute…” You blush, and he pulls you into his arms to hold you close to him again. You sigh contently if this is what making love felt like. You didn’t want to have it with anyone else. After a while of listening to each other’s heartbeats, he finally speaks up, “So, what do you say we get you cleaned up?” You sigh, “I guess.” He nods and adjusts you in his grip, “Okay, let’s go.” He gently picks you up and takes you to his bathroom before setting you on the counter. 

“You look good sitting there.” You blush, mumble a ‘thanks,’ and watch as he wets a rag. He spreads your legs and cleans up the mess you both made between them. When he moves the rag away, he smiles and kisses you on the forehead. And wipes his mess off before asking, “Do you need to use the restroom?” You laugh as you smile, “Yeah, I should… Can I kiss you?” He smiles before agreeing, “Of course.” You place your hand underneath his jaw and pull him in for a kiss, savoring the taste of his lips. He helps you off the counter before heading towards the open door, “I’ll wait for you.” You nod, “Okay.” He shuts the door behind him, goes to the bedroom, and changes the blanket out. When you return, he says, “I got you some clothes out.” You smile, “Thanks, Ju.” He shrugs, “It’s no problem.” You shimmy into them as he starts going around the room, snuffing out the candles. You smile, feeling comfortable in the outfit, and turn around, finding him still closing candle lids, and ask, “Want help?” He smiles, “Yeah.”

You join him, crawling under the bedsheets when you finish snuffing out the candles. You scoot closer before wearily putting your head on his bare chest, “Is this okay?” He grins as he laughs, “I just finished inside of you less than twenty minutes ago. Of course it is.” You laugh as you snuggle into his chest, feeling safe beside him. He moves his arm, wrapping around your side, and asks, “So?” You look up at him, “I liked it.” “Me too.” You speak without thinking, “What does that make us?” And he hums, “I don’t know what were we before?” You shrug, “I think a whole lot more than best friends. All my past lovers thought I was with you so…” He laughs, “Yours too? What do you say we make it official?” You smile, “I’d like that.” He grins, “Me too.” You settle in further into his chest as he whispers, “Do you wanna go to bed? Or do you wanna watch a movie?” You hum, giving it some thought, and he waits, reaching over to his nightstand, already knowing your answer, “Movie, please.” He smiles, grabbing the remote and turning on your guy’s favorite movie. You snuggle into him closer as you enjoy it together for the hundredth time but as lovers for the first time.

[culturez-r3blog]

Cronicamente On-line

juyeon - the boyz

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caso se inspire deixe os créditos! <3

[suhsweet]

not just friends ⟡ ljy

wc: 2879 | pair: bff!juyeon x afab!reader | genre: bffs to lovers, drunk confessions | tags: open ending, mutual pining, lovesick!juyeon, possessive!juyeon, juyeon is obsessed you with, nightclub, drinking, reader is shorter than juyeon, reader flirts and (almost) hooks up with someone else, hyunjae has the nickname ‘horny h’

summary: juyeon’s plans to interrupt your one-night-stand involves him arriving at your place completely drunk, and confessing his love for you

authors note: shout out to strong woman do bong soon for the ending. also, thank you for the love for my mingyu fic. is this what it feels like to newly debuted group that is doing well in streams?

“Juyeon buddy, we’re gonna be, like, fifty million shots behind everyone else if you don’t stop fixing your stupid hair!”

“It’s only seven,” was the taller boy’s response. He was so focused on fixing each strand of his black hair in place that he hardly paid any mind to your reflection in the mirror. “We’re supposed to be there at eight-thirty.”

“Ever heard of pre-gaming?” You muttered, stepping into his bathroom.

Tonight was Hyunjae’s birthday party, and to celebrate it, he invited the entire friend group to a new club that had just opened in Hongdae. You sighed at your best friend. If he hadn’t lived right down the block from your place, you would’ve been on your way with your other friends already.

But as you observed his face, endearingly serious and focused, you knew that deep down you didn’t mind. The butterflies that fluttered in your stomach didn’t seem to mind either. If anything, they encouraged prolonging the club so that you would spend more time alone together.

If the butterflies were real, you would’ve called an exterminator. But they weren’t. They were feelings, feelings for Juyeon which you could not manage to shove away no matter how hard you tried. It was a horrible fate that you had unintentionally forced upon yourself: Juyeon’s friend-zoned best friend.

It was torture watching people approach him whenever you were out together. You couldn’t claim him as yours. You couldn’t stop him from going on dates or looking at other people. You couldn’t delete the dating apps off of his phone. You had no say in that. He was single. You were his friend. That was it.

Sometimes you cursed the teacher who grouped you together during your first year of college. But at least through that very project, you made other friends like Changmin and Chanhee. Project meetings became lunches and dinners together as a group of four. Then you each made more friends and created a larger group. People came and went, but what remained was that after every time you spent time with your friends, you’d often go home with Juyeon.

It was a perfect coincidence that your places were a five minute walk from each other. The first time you went home together, you couldn’t believe he lived nearby and joked that he was following you around.

You grew to look forward to the end of the day as it meant spending time alone with Juyeon. The two of you spoke about your days, interests and everything inbetween. It almost felt domestic, like you were walking home to your shared apartment with your boyfriend.

Juyeon suddenly turned towards you, breaking you out of your lovesick puppy-love la-la-land.

“I can’t get my hair right, can you do it for me? Like how you did it that other time?”

With a nod, you picked up the little tub of hair wax and fixed his hair the way that you liked it, the way you did it last time. “Your hair looks just fine the way you did it though.”

He shrugs. “Feels like it looks better when you do it. Need your stamp of approval.”

Your smile cracked a smile, then focused on his hair. The two of you stood in comfortable silence. Until you felt his fingers lift your necklace from around your neck. The small pendant glittered in the light of the bathroom. It took everything in you to ignore his eyes and his touch.

“All done, looking like a movie star,” you kept your tone light. Juyeon’s touch was something you avoided because you always felt yourself craving for it in more ways than possible as platonic friends.

“When have I ever seen you without this on?” He muttered quietly, almost as if asking himself.

“Don’t get ahead of yourself now. I wear it because it’s my favorite. And it’s my favorite because it’s pretty, not because you got it for my birthday.” You couldn’t help the blush that bloomed on your cheeks. You were lying through your teeth.

“If I buy you another, will you wear that one too?” He teased.

“Shut up, can we go yet?”

⟡

The thought of that necklace remained in Juyeon’s head that night. Despite the drinks, the people, and the pounding music, he couldn’t stop himself from searching for you and checking if the necklace was still there.

The idea that you faithfully wore it since he gave it to you had him puffing his chest with pride. You were too perfect for him. Too gorgeous with your perfect hair, and smile. Smart and witty. He hated that he couldn’t keep the way your eyes lit up to himself. A small part of him liked to pretend that you wore it because his feelings were reciprocated.

“Dude you gotta stop looking at her. What’s going on? Are y’all fighting or something? This is the eleventh time I’ve seen you look for her in two hours. I’ve been counting!” Kevin sighed exasperatedly.

“Nothing, just keeping an eye out for her. Clubs can be dangerous.”

Kevin wasn’t convinced. His lips tilted upwards into a smirk as he watched you. “She’s a big girl, and the only dangerous thing right now is you after seeing who’s approaching her right now.”

Juyeon’s head immediately turned to watch an attractive guy approach you. You eyed him appreciatively as he introduced himself.

“I’m out,” Kevin said smugly, clearly noting the change in his friend’s demeanor.

From the booth that Hyunjae booked for his birthday, the view meant that one could see everything in the club. Yet from up there, Juyeon couldn’t look at anything but you as you spoke to the stranger. The music was so loud that you had to step closer to the asshole while he had to bend down so that your heads were at the same height.

Juyeon felt silly. He spent so much time doing his hair before he gave up and asked you to do it for him. He figured that by styling it in a way that you liked, you might find him attractive. Like, wait-my-best-friend-is-kinda-hot-I-want-to-date-him attractive. So much for that working out.

Now he was watching you chat with a stranger at the bar, you slapping his arm when he made you laugh. Juyeon had people approach him while he watched you, but he politely brushed them off. He was too tired to even pretend to be interested in them since you were too busy to notice.

He wouldn’t dare to ever tell you that he loved you. You were too important to him to risk your friendship like that. He’d rather choose being close to you, than not knowing you at all.

“He’s sulking,” Jacob chuckled to Chanhee, the two of them watching their friend pretend to appear nonchalant despite his eyes flickering towards your direction.

At that point in the night, Hyunjae had finished his ‘official’ birthday boy activities. The group all gathered to sing a big happy birthday, off-tempo and off-key. The bottle girls already left a while ago, bringing their ‘Happy Birthday Horny H’ signs, and sparklers down with them. All that was left to do was to party the night away.

Eric and Sunwoo were busy buying endless rounds of shots to give to the birthday boy. Some of the others were on the dance floor, or at the bar with you. A small few had left early, either because they had a big day in the morning, or had found hook-ups for the night.

It looked like you were about to be part of the latter.

Juyeon couldn’t look at you as the stranger you spoke to whispered into your ear. He knew what he’d asked when you grabbed his hand and interlocked your fingers, slowly walking him over to where the VIP section was. He watched you in his peripheral as you approached Hyunjae, who was a few drinks away from being smashed.

Hyunjae cried out your name, wrapping an arm around you and patting your head affectionately. His words were slurred and almost incomprehensible. “Thangyew fer comin’ tonighh! Best berfday evaaaa.”

Juyeon’s heart clenched at hearing your laugh. He almost jumped when you suddenly approached him with a quick tap on his arm. Juyeon almost didn’t want to bend down to hear what you were going to say, what you planned to do with that stranger of yours. “Don’t stay out too late, yeah? I’m gonna leave first.”

Juyeon’s gaze met yours, then dragged upwards behind you to look at your stranger in the distance. Juyeon looked him up and down. What did this guy have that he didn’t? Juyeon was sure he was taller than him, and he knew you liked a man with height. He almost scoffed out loud.

“Okay, call me if you need anything. Be safe.” He eyed the necklace that hung around your neck once more.

“Always am,” you winked.

Juyeon watched you join your stranger, and turned around before he could watch you leave the club. He flopped onto the sofa next to Hyunjae, and pulled out the first of many bottles of alcohol he’d drink to wash down his heartache.

⟡

You forgot this stranger’s name. Jay? Jae? You were sure there was a second syllable in his name but forgot completely. The music had drowned it out.

In one moment, you were leaving the club with your hand in his. The next, he was leaving your apartment in an Uber you booked for him as an apology. The blue-balled guy was annoyed when you suddenly pushed him off and declared that you couldn’t do it tonight. But he understood when you explained your situation, that you thought you could use this as a distraction from your feelings for your best friend. He told you that he was doing the same. With a smile that told each other that you understand each other’s pain, you agreed to part with no hard feelings.

Something about Juyeon’s expression had made you change your mind. How his eyes dulled, and the way he looked at Jae[second syllable]… It was like an abandoned cat, left to fend for itself. You couldn’t help but feel like you were cheating on him.

As you stood in your steaming shower, you pressed your forehead to the cool tiled wall. Is this how it would be for as long as you knew Juyeon? Rejecting suitors because you felt guilty about doing anything remotely romantic or sexual with anyone who wasn’t him? You knew it wasn’t fair to yourself.

By the time the clock struck one in the morning, and you finished your shower, you decided that you would worry about your feelings for Juyeon another day. You wondered if he got home safely as you climbed in bed, and shot him a quick message asking him just that.

Two hours later a loud banging came from the front door, and your phone was buzzing incessantly from an incoming call. Fright and adrenaline pulled you right up out of bed as you answered the phone.

Your name came out in a long, dragged-out whine. It was Juyeon. “Izz your friend still ‘n there? I wan’ meet him.”

He was talking loud enough that you realized that it was him on the other side of the front door. He fist kept hitting the door. You yanked it open to the sight of a red-faced Juyeon, his black dress shirt all askew with the top buttons undone low enough that you could see the ridges of his chest. His perfectly styled hair was now flattened and covering his face. He let himself in, hilariously having enough manners to shake off his shoes as he entered. The boy made a beeline to your room, albeit whilst stumbling.

You peeked your head out into the main hallway, sending apologetic looks to anyone who was also looking out as well.

Juyeon mumbled more to himself than anyone, “Where’s he… Needuh compare heights, ‘n hand sizes and, and…”

You caught his arm as he almost fell into the door frame. “There’s no one here Juyeon. What are you doing here? Let’s go to the living room.”

He sagged onto your couch with a loud sigh. He laid along the length of it, one long leg on the sofa, and the other on the floor. If he wasn’t drunk out of his mind, the sight of him with his legs spread wide like that would’ve been tempting. You retrieved a hot towel from the bathroom to wipe the sweat and grime from the club off of him. You sat on a footstool while you got to work. His head was tilted back off the couch’s arm, his eyes shut and his mouth gaped open slightly.

Juyeon didn’t even flinch as you cleaned him the best you could. You wiped his face, neck, and chest without digging too deep under his shirt. You would have to grab his spare clothes from your closet if he was going to sleep over tonight. It seemed highly likely, judging by the state of him. “What are you doing here Ju?”

His head came up to look at you through adorably squinted eyes.

“Wahnted to see if yorrr friend can fight,” he hiccuped. “Did he like yorr necklace when you were on top? ‘Tis my necklus. Mine. Yours. Ours?”

You could not believe your ears. He’s still going on about the stupid necklace. “No one’s here, and no one has had the pleasure of seeing your precious necklace dangling while I’m riding them. Do you want it back? You seem to like it so much…”

“No! Keep i’ forevuh and evuh. I like it on you… ‘N I like yuu.” It seemed like he was starting to mumble nonsense. You shook your head to yourself. He’s drunk. He doesn’t know what he’s saying. He sighed dramatically. “Don’ evuh take it off. I love yuu. You’re so good to me. I love yuuu.”

As a friend, you told yourself.

“Water should make you sober, right?” You muttered under your breath as he kept mumbling about how much he apparently liked you. You rose to dispose of the towel, get some water, and his clothes but his hands wrapped around your wrist and pulled you back down.

Shock ran through you as you felt yourself fall onto the couch right in front of Juyeon who folded in his leg to make space for you. He leaned in so that you were at eye level and looked at you as seriously as his drunken gaze could allow.

A pointer finger was aimed at you and Juyeon started wagging it like a parent telling off a child. “Yuu. I love yuuu. Do you hear mee?”

“Loud and clear, Juyeon.”

“I’ve liked you fuh soooo looong, but you never know. Knew? I know I’m drunk bu-but you should believe me. I really like you, ‘n I would be sososo good to you.” He tapped his giant finger on your nose.

He watched your reaction with bleary eyes, almost looking as if there wasn’t a thought in his head. Juyeon head tilted to the side. He brought the pointed finger closer to your face, and caressed your cheek with the back of it. Your heart squeezed at the tender touch. His eyes almost looked sad as he focused on his finger. Sad, with every sleepy blink of his eyes. “Mmmmh, so preeeetty. Preetty girl.”

You sighed. “Okay, time for bed.”

“No, no bed. Wide awake,” he shook his head, dizzying self so much that he almost fell forward.

“Let’s talk in the morning. I need to get you some water, and your clothes so that you can change. Do you want to stay the night?” Juyeon dumbly stared at your lips as you talked. You almost laughed at the sight of him slowly leaning in, hypnotized. You placed an arm on his shoulder to keep him at a distance. “Juyeon!”

“I dun’ know.”

You giggled at the words. He blinked at you, grinning a dopey grin at your smile. The butterflies were back again. Juyeon took your hand from his shoulder and brought his lips to each knuckle, kissing gently. Your heart stuttered at his action. With both hands, he flattened your fingers across his cheek, sliding them up until the fingertips brushed his hair line and his cheek rested in your palm.

Juyeon sandwiched your hand between back of the sofa and his head, using it like a pillow. One large hand kept your hand pressed against his cheek, while another kept hold of your wrist.

You curled into a ball to get comfortable, bringing yourself closer to him. You also leaned your head against the back of the sofa to watch him blink at you until his eyes remained closed.

Earlier you told yourself you’d worry about your feelings for Juyeon another day. So for now, you allowed yourself this little moment. To pretend he was yours and to try to memorize the feeling of his hands holding yours. Because eventually, you’ll have to let go.

“Please look at me,” he softly murmured before he succumbed to sleep.

Your heart squeezed. “I’ve never looked away.”

[daisyvisions]

Do I Wanna Know? | Octoberfest Day 2

➺ Pairing - best friend!Juyeon x fem! reader

➺ Drink - Old Fashioned with a hint of absinthe (aka best friend!au x high / drunk sex)

➺ Summary - They say you should always chase your dreams...But what if your dream is a person?

➺ Word Count - 0.9K

➺ Warnings - Smut (18+, minors DNI), wet dreams, unprotected sex, dub con (don't read if triggering), foreplay, fingering, dry humping, messy makeouts, begging, wet dreams, marking, creampie, hair pulling, biting (?), a very in love Juyeon if you look closer , idiots-to-lovers eventually

➺ Author’s note - a shorter fic for today but I had this idea in my wips for a long time, felt like it was the right time to use it haha thinking of making a part 2 for this but do let me know if you’re interested in that! Title inspired by the Arctic Monkeys song of course. Proofread once, hope you enjoy!

➺ Taglist - @deoboyznet @snowflakewhispers @midnightfantasiez

@momhwa-agenda @nyu-topia @jaminthemiddle

➺ OctoberFest Masterlist

It almost seemed too real for Juyeon.

The way you whined under his touch. How his lips kissed the soft skin of your neck, one hand holding your neck while the other rested on your hip, enveloping you in a warm embrace as he cuddled you in his bed from behind. Holding onto you as if you'd slip away from him at any given moment.

He always had dreams like this. Dreams where he had you to himself. Dreams where he crossed the boundary of your friendship. Dreams where he could finally call you his. Dreams where you felt the same as he did.

Oh, how he hated waking up from these kinds of dreams, because he would have to face the reality that you were not his.

It's not that Juyeon hated being your best friend. He would rather choose your friendship over anything, even if it meant squashing down whatever romantic feelings he had for you. Even if it meant one day you two could no longer hang out the way you would because someone else had your attention.

Until then, he would cherish every moment he had with you, relish in dreams where he was the center of your attention for once. To touch you as only a lover should, just like he's currently doing in this very hazy but vivid dream.

"I want you," he mumbles in your ear, "I want you all to myself."

"Then have me. I've always been yours…" you whine out.

Something stirred within Juyeon as you said those words, making him tighten his grip on you as he started to leave love bites on your neck and shoulder. His hands snaked beneath your denim shorts, his palm cupping your sex as you moaned sweetly for him.

Juyeon's fingers start to dip between your folds, teasing your sensitive bud as you squirm against him. You couldn't help but desperately gasp his name, begging for him to undress you and tear you apart. And so he did, aggressively pulling down your shorts and pulling your panties to the side.

You could feel his clothed erection pressed up against your wet entrance as he slowly ruts into you, one hand cupping your mound as the other lifts your leg for better access.

Juyeon's breath falters as he feels your slick slowly dampening his clothes. He lets out a growl against your ear, swiftly removing his own pants as his desire for you grows stronger. He desperately needed to feel your skin against his, even your wetness was starting to feel too real for him to comprehend. He tugs his length briefly before aligning himself to your entrance, his tip eagerly nudging as he waits for your command.

"Tell me you want it." Juyeon gently holds your jaw with his other hand, wanting to look into your eyes as you beg for him to cross the line.

"Please, I want it. I want it so bad," you whine. Juyeon leans forward, his lips just a whisper away from touching yours as his eyes look down to your lips.

"If I give it to you, there's no turning back," he says with a deep and slow voice, subtly warning you of the consequences of your actions.

"I don't care," you breathe out, your eyes filled with desire. "I want you, Juyeon. I've always wanted you."

Without hesitation, Juyeon captures your lips in a passionate kiss, his hips slowly pushing forward as he enters you. You both moan into the kiss, overwhelmed by the sensation of finally becoming one.

Your hand instantly grabs his hair behind you as he starts to thrust his entire length inside you. Juyeon groans as you tug onto his hair, slowly increasing his pace while he holds your leg up. You two don't stop kissing as he continues to fuck himself between your velvety walls. Lips slotting between one another perfectly, tongues intertwining with one another, moaning into each other's mouths.

Everything about this dream was perfect to Juyeon, almost too perfect in fact. From all the wet dreams he's had, this one by far had to be the most vivid. Your touch, your sounds, even the smell of the shampoo you used, it almost seemed like—

"Fuck, I'm so close—" Juyeon slurs his words. "Come with me, please come with me," he begs.

"Juyeon, I— ugh!" Your walls suddenly squeeze his cock as you tighten your grip on his hair, tugging it as you fall over the edge. Juyeon comes right after you, his warmth instantly blooming inside you as he stills. He tries to catch his breath for a moment, trying to grasp why everything felt too real for him…

"Juyeon!"

He feels his body being shaken as your panicked voice causes his eyes to flutter open. His vision slowly adjusting as he feels his bed dip, your figure moving frantically as you pull away from him. Once Juyeon's vision starts to become clear, he sees your widened eyes looking back at him, as if you've seen a ghost.

"What's going on?" his groggy voice asks you, but you don't move a muscle as you're frozen in place.

Something wet flutters around his cock, making Juyeon hiss at the feeling. The moment he looks down to check, the realization hits him like a tidal wave… it wasn't a dream after all.

"Oh fuck…"

[juyoluvs]

light a candle | l.juyeon

—————

☆pairing: single fatherljuyeon x teacher fem!reader

☆tags: fluff!, slow but not so slow burn, really slight smut, mentions of alcohol, swearing, mentions of death, mentions of other members, eric is kinda toxic here :)

☆summary: after your last relationship you swore to yourself that you wouldn't fall in love again but you change your thoughts when you see a little girl and her...very hot dad

disclaimer! all the people on this fic are pure imagination and are fake, they don't relate to the real people at all.

STATUS: on going! (19.10. 24)

1 2 。。。

Chapter two

It had now been several months since your last relationship.

You couldn't say that it was still an open wound but neither that it didn't tempt you from time to time.

"Wait a second, what do you mean by that?" you asked trying to process the words of the boy in front of you.

He sighed, passing his hand over his face before returning his gaze to you.

"I mean that...it’s so boring being with you y/n..." he then added.

Not hearing a response from you he continued his speech.

"You're always talking about those children, what they do, what they tell you...do you ever think about me?"

"Eric of course I think about you, why the fuck would you say-"

"Well it doesn't seem like it, you're starting to treat me like a child too!" he added, raising his voice slightly.

"Of course I'm treating you like a child when you think exactly like one!"

"y/n..."

"it's over."

“Stupid child.”

That was all you could think remembering how Eric had thrown away your 3 years old relationship because he was jealous of your students.

It was an inevitably comical situation but inside you the fear of starting something new with someone remained constant.

Kevin and Vivienne had tried several times to introduce you to new people and even made you join (without your knowledge) a dating app but the results were always terrible.

Of course what your best friend did not expect was to see you completely crushing on the father of one of your students.

It had not escaped her at all how for the past week you had been much more radiant and perfectly dressed up in the mornings and staying late every day waiting for the last parent (who happened to always be Juyeon) to arrive.

And of course you had not missed her glances whenever you greeted Juyeon on the way out.

"What's wrong?" you asked her one afternoon while the children were playing in the garden.

"Nothing" she gave a sly smile as she shrugged slightly.

"Why are you looking at me like that then?"

"Because you just can't hide anything, you're embarrassing."

"What?" you looked at her shocked "What do you mean by that?" you said snorting a laugh.

"When were you planning to tell me about your crush on Lee Juyeon also known as Isabelle's father?" she said resting her hands on her hips like a mother scolding her daughter.

You turned to look at her, feigning an embarrassed laugh.

"What crush?! He’s a married man Viv! I have no crush on anyone."

Vivienne came dangerously close to your face, startling you.

“I probably shouldn't tell you this but..just so you know, he's a single father."

Oh.

"Unless he's married to that Paul guy, their numbers are the only ones saved in the parent registry."

“Oh.” your brain couldn’t process anything else.

“Still, why would he look at his daughter teacher?” you said.

“Because you’re hot?”

“Viv.”

She raised her eyes, sighing.

"Anyways, I'm totally rooting for you, don't let me down" she finished with a wink.

And before you could say something, here she was already rushing off to entertain the children with some group dances, leaving you alone to sigh.

︶ ֢ ⏝ ֢ ︶ ୨୧ ︶ ֢ ⏝ ֢ ︶

That same afternoon, while helping Isabelle color another one of her thousand drawings here it was the angelic figure of Juyeon appearing from the doorframe.

Always like the first time.

The little girl, as always, ran into her father's arms as you followed her while still keeping a distance between you and them.

"How did it go today?" he asked the little girl.

"Good! We learned the colors in English! Red, yellow,blue, black-" the little girl said in response as she began to list all the colors she had learned that morning.

"That's so good! Listen to how well you pronounce them, I'm so proud of you." he said and just then he turned to look at you, causing you to miss a few beats.

"Did she behave well?"

You nodded, smiling.

"Of course she did, she is so sweet and very smart, I was amazed to hear how she still remembered all the colors, usually they tend to forget them after a few hours" You replied, looking at the little girl and giving her a light caress in her hair that made her laugh a little.

The man next to you smiled, nodding slightly.

"I'm glad to hear that, i guess she’s not like her daddy, thankfully"he said, leaving her a light kiss on her cheek.

"Well, I think it’s time to go and free Miss Y/n, Grandma is waiting for us at home" he then added, leaving the little girl on the floor.

After the usual goodbyes you watched them walking toward the exit before a flash hit your memory.

"Ah, Mr. Lee!" You said, drawing the attention of the man who turned to look at you.

"I don't know if you've been notified yet but this Friday is Children-Parents Day, we're doing some activities and then doing a little meeting to inform parents of the plans for the school year...I know it might be a problem for your work so don't worry if you can't make it I tak-"

"I'll definitely be there." he interrupted you with a smile.

"Oh, very well then, see you tomorrow!"

They left you with one last goodbye before disappearing behind the school doors.

"We were saying?" a voice said behind you, that you recognized as Vivienne's, scaring you.

"Shut up."

︶ ֢ ⏝ ֢ ︶ ୨୧ ︶ ֢ ⏝ ֢ ︶

Friday arrived sooner than expected and especially sooner than it should have because now, an hour before the start of activities, you were already running from one side of the school to the other to keep everything under control.

Colours, games, sheets of paper, music.

Everything seemed to be according to plan.

Except for your hair which, despite this morning's efforts, had already become a unique mess.

You took advantage of a moment of rest to quickly gather it into a braid and then head for the entrance where the children had started to arrive.

The atmosphere at school that day was livelier than usual, with the laughter of parents and children filling the rooms.

It was, if nothing else, one of your favourite days of the school year.

Caught up chatting with parents about this and that, a pair of hands that wrapped themselves around your leg took you by surprise.

"Miss. Y/n!" Isabelle's little voice exclaimed, calling for your attention.

Your face opened into a happy, surprised expression and apologetically you turned around, taking the little girl in your arms and giving her your undivided attention.

She was, as usual, fully perfectly dressed with a long braid similar to yours and a large bow at the end of it.

"Isa! How beautiful you look today! Did you come with Paul?" you asked as the little girl shook her head.

"I promised I'd be there, didn't I?" a voice behind you answered for her.

You turned to see the usual Lee Juyeon with his usual sculpted face and a suit, totally out of place in a kindergarten.

With a smile that could make anyone collapse, he approached your figure as you had to beg all the strength in the universe to keep your legs solid and stable on the ground.

"It's good to see you Mr. Lee, I guess Isa is glad to have her daddy at school today" you said looking at the little one who was now nodding brightly.

"Daddy look! Miss. Y/n has a braid like me!" said the little one noticing your close-cropped hair.

"Oh" replied the man looking tenderly at how the little girl had started playing with your hair "It looks very good on her, I can't deny it." he continued and your cheeks suddenly turned a bright shade of red.

You tried to huff out a nervous laugh, bringing your attention back to Isa so as not to cross her gaze.

"Isa looks beautiful in this braid, this bow is gorgeous!" you tried to shift your attention back to the little girl but she was blatantly playing devil's advocate.

"Daddy made it for me! Give Miss Y/n a bow too daddy!”

"Oh no, no need Isa really-" but before you could finish the sentence Juyeon had already pulled a bow out of his pocket and was handing it to you.

"I'll take a couple with me, just in case she needs them-" he said almost embarrassed after pulling a pink bow out of his dark suit.

You could do nothing but say thank you and take the bow which, promptly, Isa threaded through your hair.

"Now we are the same!" the delighted child exclaimed and in front of that smile you completely melted.

︶ ֢ ⏝ ֢ ︶ ୨୧ ︶ ֢ ⏝ ֢ ︶

After a short time, everyone was invited to go into their classrooms and next to Vivienne you started to illustrate the first activity.

It was a simple art project where parents and children collaborated in drawing but the results were always wonderful and the families always came out happy.

Passing between the tables you would try to lend a hand in case help was needed or just to get the children to tell you about their work.

At one point Vivienne touched your shoulder lightly, drawing your attention.

"I think you need to give your favourite one a hand” she said only pointing with her head in the direction of Juyeon and Isabelle where the man, now covered in glitter, was trying to glue them onto the drawing, failing miserably.

A light laugh came out of your mouth before you reached their small table, clearly too small for the man.

"How's the masterpiece coming along over here?" you said once you reached their coffee table.

Juyeon looked up laughing, slightly embarrassed.

"Well, I'm not sure if we're going for abstract or accidental...but we're getting somewhere." he said as Isabelle had started wandering around the table, looking for the colours she needed.

"Abstract art is always a good choice. It leaves room for interpretation." you said, laughing slightly.

Juyeon raised an eyebrow, intrigued.

"So, what's your professional interpretation of...this?" he said, pointing to the glitter-filled sheets that occupied the table.

You lowered yourself onto your knees to observe them more closely, with the father and daughter by your side.

"Hmm... I'd say it's a bold exploration of colour and chaos. Very avant-garde." you replied playfully, seeing Isabelle's confused face trying to understand what this avant-garde was.

Juyeon snorted a laugh while giving you a slight smirk.

"What can I say? I'm committed to the art."

"Clearly. Perhaps only a little help is needed to represent Isa's wonderful artistic vision."

"Oh? You think we need professional help?" he asked, sounding almost defiant.

"Absolutely Mr.Lee-"

"Please, call me Juyeon." he said with a gentle smile.

Fucckk, he's so hot.

"OK..Juyeon, lucky for you, I just happen to be an art enthusiast and a kindergarten teacher. Two birds, one stone." you replied, feigning some big ego that Vivienne would certainly be proud of.

"I don't know, we might be a lost cause. But I could never refuse the help of an expert.”he replied, making room between the two of them.

You then moved between them, now bringing your attention to Isa.

"So what's the plan?"

And as you listened attentively to Isabelle's request for a big pink glittery unicorn (after all, what could you expect from a five-year-old?) you felt Juyeon's watchful gaze on your every move.

Between a pink pencil and a tube of glitter you looked up, meeting his eyes.

Trying to ignore the beat that your heart just lost, you gave him a slightly smile.

"What? Surprised I can paint too?" you said teasingly but with a softer tone.

Juyeon smirked slightly.

"A little. I didn't know kindergarten teachers had so many hidden talents." he said taking a marker, continuing to colour under his daughter's orders.

"Let's just say I have a few tricks up my sleeve" you replied, keeping a smile on your face.

"I guess I can't wait to find out the others."

And after that sentence your brain went into shutdown.

There was a slight silence, a comfortable pause as the children's laughter and parents' chatter filled that void.

What?

The whole thought was interrupted by Isabelle who, having completed her drawing, lifted it into the air for her father to see.

"Daddy, look! The unicorn!" she exclaimed enthusiastically.

Juyeon, breaking the moment with a chuckle, looked at his daughter's work.

"That looks awesome, sweetie. We might just have to hang even this one up at home."

You stared at them, smiling warmly.

"See? A little guidance can go a long way." you said.

Juyeon turned his head to look at you, but you're too busy talking with his daughter again.

"Yeah, I guess it can." he just said by himself.

︶ ֢ ⏝ ֢ ︶ ୨୧ ︶ ֢ ⏝ ֢ ︶

After the morning activity all children, with parents attached, are invited to the afternoon refreshment in the schoolyard.

Hearing the children's laughter as they play with each other fills your heart with joy enormously, especially when accompanied by the stories of the parents who madly love to talk about their children.

And you just have to listen to them happily.

That was before, out of the corner of your eye, you noticed the other figure of Juyeon standing alone and watching from afar as Isa played with his friends, while from a saucer he ate the cake one of the teachers had prepared for the day.

The scene warmed your heart and apologising to the parents, you headed towards the drinks table to get a second glass of lemonade and then walked towards the man who was now choking on the previously mentioned cake.

"Here, you look like you could use this” you said handing him the glass, laughing slightly at the scene.

He thanked you with a look, taking the glass and drinking immediately to calm his coughing fits.

Once he was stable again, he turned to look at you.

"Thanks, great cake anyway" he only said, making you laugh heartly.

"Don't worry, you seemed to be enjoying it a bit too much" you replied amused.

"How's it going?" you added, sipping from your glass.

"Good I guess..I'm not really good at these kinds of things." he replied, scratching his head.

"What, you don't enjoy awkward small talk with strangers?"

"It's not my strong suit." he replied, laughing nervously.

"You know…you're allowed to relax. Isabelle's having lots of fun." you said, watching the children play from afar.

"Yeah, she really is, isn't she? Sometimes I forget she's growing up so much every day".

"That's because you love her so much. But it's okay to let yourself enjoy these moments too. She'll be just fine," you said gently, trying to relax those big shoulders that remained tense, looking at his little girl from afar.

Juyeon then turned his gaze slowly to you, slightly hesitant.

"You seem to know how to balance everything so well. How do you do it?"

You turned to look at him and your gazes met again, making your heart flutter a little.

"Years of practice with little ones. And, well, sometimes you just have to remind yourself to breathe. You're allowed to enjoy the moment too, Juyeon," you replied, smiling.

He smiled back, turning and looking at the children.

"I think I could learn a thing or two from you," he said alone.

"I think you're doing pretty well already," you replied.

And so the refreshments ended, taking everyone back to their respective classrooms.

︶ ֢ ⏝ ֢ ︶ ୨୧ ︶ ֢ ⏝ ֢ ︶

The day passed quickly, amidst dances and songs that enlivened all the parents and entertained the children, soon it was time for talks between parents and teachers.

You and Vivienne split up the families to take less time and get everyone out as soon as possible.

While the children continued playing, one by one the parents went in and out of your classroom door to hear what they needed to know about their children.

Fortunately, your class was a good one and so there were no special cases to analyse or help.

Just when you thought you'd seen the last of the parents, Juyeon appeared through the doorway, with that usual damn smile.

Obviously, Vivienne had played her cards right to get you two alone.

Damn her.

"May I?" he said, entering the classroom and pointing to the chair in front of your desk.

You gestured for him to take a seat.

"You know, for a teacher, you didn't warn me that I'd be wearing half the art supplies by the end of the day," he said, noticing some paint and glitter stains on his suit.

"Hey, I did warn you. You were too busy showing off to Isabelle to listen." you laughed, shaking your head slightly.

"Showing off? I was just responding to her orders. Big difference." he said, playing offended.

"I noticed, you put in a lot of effort, I'm glad."

Juyeon chuckles, rubbing the back of his neck sheepishly, clearly enjoying the little back-and-forth.

"What can I say?" he started.

"My kid brings it out in me. She thinks I'm some sort of superhero, so I have to live up to the hype, right?"

You nodded.

"Isabelle adores you, you know. She talks about you all the time. You're not just her superhero-you're her whole world." you replied with a sweet smile, remembering all the times the little girl mentioned her daddy when she had a chance.

"Yeah, she's my world too. Everything I do is for her."

You watch him for a moment, seeing the tenderness in his eyes.

"Sometimes I wonder if I'm doing enough, you know? It's just the two of us, and I worry... about missing things, or not being there the way I should."

Hearing him open up so much to you made your heart warm with joy, and all you could think about was how much love there was between the father and the daughter.

"You're there in all the ways that matter. You can see it in how happy she is. How confident she's becoming. That's all because of you." you said with a sweet look, trying to comfort him.

There's a beat of silence, the atmosphere growing a little more serious, Juyeon's gaze softens as he looks at your eyes.

“I have to thank you too. You're so good with her, y/n. She really looks up to you. It's like... she feels safe around you."

You couldn't hide a smile at his words.

"Isabelle's a special kid. She's so sweet, and once she opens up, she's got so much love to give. Honestly, she makes my job easier" you replied.

"Yes, I can see where she gets it from" he began, "And I can see why she likes you so much. You've got that effect on people." he continued, leaving you completely speechless.

Your cheeks turned red again and your smile became more playful, trying to joke about it so you wouldn't lose your mind.

"Is that your way of complimenting me again, Juyeon? Because I'm keeping track, you know." you asked, teasing him a little bit.

He gave a slight smirk before continuing to speak.

"You deserve all the compliments. I just happen to be the one lucky enough to give them."

Oh fuck, he's good, he's really good.

It took you a few seconds to process it all and when you regained consciousness, a soft laugh came out of your mouth.

"You're impossible, you know that?" you ask, trying to escape his gaze.

"Maybe. But you're still here."

There was this energy in the air that you cannot quite define.

Lost in his gaze a thousand questions come back to you.

Is he really flirting with me? Or is he just trying to be friends?

There is clearly something that seems to attract you to each other and anyone, even outside that room, could see that.

Trying to find words along your vocal chords,you shook your head, smiling slightly.

"I guess I am," you only said , before being interrupted by Isabelle's small voice.

"Dad! Miss. Y/n! Look at my new drawing!" she said, making you laugh slightly before returning your full attention to the little one, but the spoken words and tension were still hovering vividly in the room.

︶ ֢ ⏝ ֢ ︶ ୨୧ ︶ ֢ ⏝ ֢ ︶

After this meeting the situation between you seemed to be going great.

There were no particular developments but those light chats at the end of classes warmed your hearts before going home.

Vivienne often monitored the situation from afar, nodding proudly at her best friend.

By now Juyeon and Isabelle had become part of your everyday life and you couldn't be happier.

Yet your heart did not stop beating fiercely every time your glances crossed a little too long or when your hands brushed lightly against each other.

But it was still all too abstract, still a simple crush that all your friends were already sick of.

Until, on a cloudy Friday afternoon, while you and Isabelle waited as usual for Juyeon colori g together, he arrived with two coffees and a small brown bag in his hands.

"Hey there! I brought you both a little something to brighten the day." he said, slightly raising what he had in his hand.

The little girl as usual ran to hug him and then let her curiosity get the better of her as she tried to peek inside the bag.

Smiling you got up from your chair as your eyes shone with happiness at the sight of the coffee in the man’s hands.

He looked at you, returning the happy gaze.

With the weather announcing no improvement and the fact that you hadn't been able to have a proper lunch, that coffee to you really seemed like a goldmine.

Juyeon smiled before listening to little Isabelle's insistence, gripped by curiosity to know the contents of the bag.

“What's in there Dad? Is it snacks? Is it Dad?" she asked.

"Maybe darling, but first, coffee for Miss Y/n. She's been working hard all day." he said and then handed you the hot cup.

You took the cup, smelling the sweet scent coming from it, feeling in heaven.

"This is perfect, i swear. How did you know I was running on fumes?" you asked, taking a light sip from the cup.

"I can read some signs you know? Especially when the teacher starts looking more like a painting than a person." said Juyeon and with a smile he pointed with his head at the thousand colours that now occupied your apron.

You looked at yourself slightly and then burst out laughing.

"I guess you're probably right" you nodded, continuing to drink from your cup as the man in front of you reached down towards his daughter and pulled out the biscuits he had diligently chosen and bought.

Watching them interact a sweet smile formed on your face, everything seemed so perfect.

Once the little girl had her own biscuit, according to her father's instructions, she went to collect her things, leaving you and Juyeon alone again.

"Anyway, the coffee is also to thank you. I appreciate everything you do for her. She really loves coming to your class. And also to apologise for the very frequent delays" he began, scratching his head slightly embarrassed.

You turned to look at him, a sweet and sincere smile on your lips.

"Don't worry Juyeon and plus,I love being with her. She brightens my day every time."

As always, your gazes met, sending sparks flying across the room.

Juyeon took a long breath before resuming speaking.

"You know... I was wondering. I mean, since you've already admitted to liking my coffee... maybe I could treat you to a cup sometime. Outside of the classroom." he said alone, lowering his voice slightly.

You raised an interested eyebrow.

"Are you asking me on a coffee date, Mr. Coffee Barista?" you asked, teasing him like always.

"Yeah, I am. That is, if you're willing to see if my coffee is as good outside the classroom." he said then.

You pretended to think about it, lightly touching your chin with your finger with an exaggerated thoughtfulness before breaking into a grin.

"Well, I suppose I could be convinced. But I'm tough on dates, you know." you replied at last.

He shrugged slightly.

"I'll take my chances. What's life without a little risk?"

He then pulled out his phone, handing it to you.

"So... do you think I can have your number for this very important coffee date?"

Smiling, you took his phone, no need to think twice.

You typed your number, leaving him to choose the name for the contact.

"There you go. But remember, I take my coffee very seriously." you said, handing the phone back to him.

He took the phone back with a slight smirk on his face.

"Oh, don't worry. I'll make sure it's the best cup you've ever had." he said and interrupting the moment was Isabelle who, having finished tidying up and with her backpack on her shoulder, had run over.

"Can I have a coffee date too, Dad?" she asked genuinely making you laugh in unison, filling the room with your laughter and the little one's confused look.

Once you waved them goodbye on their way out, Vivienne's presence beside you came like lightning.

"So...coffee date mh?"

You turned to look at her slightly.

"I don't know how many 'shut ups' I have in me anymore, you know?"

︶ ֢ ⏝ ֢ ︶ ୨୧ ︶ ֢ ⏝ ֢ ︶

writer notes: hope you’re liking this! （＾ν＾） kisses

[sungbeam]

9:47PM — lee juyeon x gn!reader

a/n: okay but if i did ever go thru w my frat tbz series, this would be so much fun for juyo, just saying 😭 she's been stewing in my brain for how long now

You were just walking beneath the balconies of one of the frat houses when you came to an abrupt halt. Tipsy and unaware of your actions, your friend Ningning crashed right into your back. “Yn, what—”

“Waitwaitwait!” You told her as you backpedaled a few steps to get a better view.

The two of you were situated in the middle of a Greek Row block party and it was raging all around you. But on your way down the street, your eyes had caught the marvel of a man leaning over his balcony railing, nursing a can of beer and people-watching. Your buzzed out brain nearly melted into a puddle of goop at the sight of his soft-eyed smile as he laughed at something his brothers were doing across the street at the cornhole boards.

You cupped your hands around your mouth and gave a holler, “Heey, pretty boy!” Oh, you definitely sounded drunk, but you swore you weren't…

The man heard you, loud and clear, and turned his head with wide eyes in your direction. When he saw you there with a big grin on your face, his cheeks darkened. “Wh—who? Me?” He asked while pointing at himself.

“But soft!” You replied, reaching your hands up toward him and then clutching at your heart, “what light through yonder window breaks? It is the east and Juliet the sun.”

He was fully facing you now and nearly half folded over the railing with his smile as giddy as a girl on the telephone with a lover. “My name's Juyeon, not Juliet, by the way.”

“If I told you my phone number, would you correct it with yours, too?”

[chishikizi]

⌕ We Love on Air

Capa teste — para doação em breve

Sugestão de @heartzric

⚠︎ Caso se inspire, me credite

⎙ 24.05.24

[from-m-izzy]

[22:58] | tbz lee juyeon

» ​PAIRING: tbz lee juyeon x fem!reader » TROPE/AU​: established relationship au, non-idol au » GENRE​: smut 18+ (mdni!!) 🔞 just a tinge of fluff cause juyeon is momentarily shy after (...hehe) » WORD COUNT: 1764​ » ESTIMATED READING TIME: ~7 mins » WARNINGS (lmk if i missed anything!): food play (ice cream), temperature play (cold), fingering (reader receiving), literally a second of anal fingering, soft dom!juyeon, momentary mean dom!juyeon, cum eating, dirty talk, slight size kink (juyeon is bigger than the reader), unprotected sex (be safe everyone!!)

navi/masterlist!! 🤍

thanks for helping with the reading @sohnric, @winterchimez !!

head empty...no thoughts...

happy birthday, lee juyeon!!

head empty...no thoughts...

i'm so shy right now bye—

This was not how you thought the Neapolitan ice cream cake would be used.

There's no sweet taste in the valley that splits your breasts. Nothing but the taste of sweat and Juyeon’s fragrant exhales, the remnants of his birthday treat from his mouth, as he buries his face between your freed chest. He kisses your skin softly, roughly contrasting to the movements of his trailing hands from your stomach, down to your covered core.

He wastes no time, hooking the crotch area of your panties aside with his middle finger, plunging his pointer inside of you, and trudging the inside of your walls. The touch that his skin gave lingers on your dripping cunt and the top of your head meets the marbled countertop once again.

Your hands fly to the side of your body, trying to grab something from the pleasure building as Juyeon unhooks the middle finger to follow the motions of his pointer.

Pulling out slowly, pushing it back in even slower but deeper each Juyeone.

“Oh my God.” Finding nothing to grab so you mess up his still product-filled hair. Your hardworking boyfriend didn’t even bother changing out of his work clothes, opting to work on your body as soon as you greeted him. In fact, you’re surprised that he at least threw his collared button out, his black everyday tie on top of the puddle of clothing.

It sucks that he did that because maybe then if any of the ice cream colours stain his white shirt, maybe he could explain the backstory to his workmates.

Your closed eyes allow your senses to be directed to the warmth that his body gave yours: Juyeon’s tongue that leaves wet, messy suctioned kisses from your chest all the way to your navel, his one free hand that grips the side of your thigh, the other hand bringing you closer to the end as the pad of this thumb presses and circles on your sensitive clit. His pinky is what drove you feral, frozen halfway in your other hole and the other three fingers pushed you closer to your climax.

“Oh, you're so fucking…” Juyeon groans at your mewls, feeling the painful grip that his pants held onto his growing cock. “You’re drenched, bubs.”

“J-Juyeon.” You gasp his name, begging for more of his touch.

Your boyfriend shakes his head, still smiling at you sweetly. He detaches his face from your abdomen and makes eye contact with you. If it wasn't for the way you're laid tiredly but still very much horny, for the way that both your chests are exposed to each other, for the way that Juyeon snakes an arm behind you to get you to sit prettily at the edge of the counter, then his twenty-sixth birthday would have been so innocent.

But here he is, kneeling on the floor, a spoonful of the dessert in his hand as he trails the metal edge on the inside of your thighs. It trails from your midthigh, his tongue following closely behind the ombre colours, reflexively making your legs close. 

The temperature makes you squirm, an added unexpected stimulation that you are enjoying. 

“I see.” Juyeon takes a mental note of the added list of things that leave you breathless.

Finally, the back of the curved utensil hovers above your aching clit. Juyeon looks up, giving the most bright yet lust-filled gaze at you. His thumb stops his abuse for a second, replacing it with the cold instead—thank God the edge of the table is within reach, or else you would have melted already.

If it wasn't enough seeing you all ruined, Juyeon straightens his legs, his mind already wanting to see something else coated in the dessert—coat your hardened nipples the same way that he did just before. For a second, he steps back to admire his work, admiring your half-lidded eyes and rapid breathing.

“Oh.” He coos, his hand below going faster on you. “Ohh,” he says once more, feasting on the chocolate, strawberry and vanilla on your nipples.

A palm presses onto your back, plunging you to the crevices of his face. “Shit!” It's when you realise that he suspends your buds between his teeth along with the aggressive sucking that alternates between. “Fuck, fuck, fuck.”

Not another warning is given as your insides give up, the liquid squirting to make a cloudy pink and brown mess on his hand. Juyeon grunts at the sight, now finished with his appetiser.

“Baby.” He warns, and you see the darkness in his eyes. “Did I tell you to let go?”

“I-I’m—” Your back hits the surface again. “J-Ju—” A hand presses on your collarbone, keeping you in place as your hands fly to wrap around his veiny, muscular arms.

You're greeted with the sight of Juyeon’s bangs covering his hungry desire and when your eyes lower past his defined abs, you salivate at the way he pulls his cock out from his half-down trousers and the way it is immediately enwrapped in his fist. 

“I haven't even gotten a taste of you yet and you're already making a mess.” It's frustrating to him as it's something that he's been wanting for so long. “You're not such a good girl, after all.”

The precum leaks from the slit of his penis, the foreskin coming up and down to coat the natural lube on the rest of his length. He forces you to look at him, the fact of the mess that you've created.

“Do something, please.”

“You bet I will.” 

Juyeon's fingers dig into your skin, and you scream at how he matches the force with his hips. He rams into you, not caring about adjusting your small size to his humongous one.

Marking you on your neck and jawline, going past his unfinished dessert on your nipple—on an urgent mission to make it bright purple and blue to the point where you'll have to sit for hours in front of your makeup to cover them up.

It makes you scream each time he degrades you, calling you his “favourite slut” as if he had another woman to fuck. He whispers seductively to your ear, grunting each time his balls hit your ass. “Enjoying this a little bit too much?”

“N-No.” You lie, biting your bottom lip with the top row of your teeth. “Juyeon! Oh my fucking God!”

“You're so pretty.” Ramming into your body harder and faster. “You're so small that I can see my body inside you.” To prove his point, he pushes on your stomach and you whine at the press, feeling his girth deep inside even more.

“Fuck!” Your legs ran out of strength and Juyeon menacingly smiled, throwing your limbs to rest on his shoulder. “You fucking---”

He presses his lips to yours, stopping your dirty mouth from finishing. “It's not nice to curse the birthday boy on his day, bubs.”

The endearing name would've been great if you were not literally folding against him right now.

“But yes, I will make sure I fuck you,” Your grip his shoulder knowing what's next.

“and I'll fuck you,” Juyeon’s hands cage your waist, pulling you to the edge of the furniture for easier access to your womb.

“so hard,” a thrust, one that makes you drool.

“and so fast,” your boobs move and jiggle faster as he picks up his pace, following the pulls and pushes that he exerts on your half-ruined body.

“to the point that you'll pass out faster than the ice cream cake.” 

Juyeon does work on your body, squirming at your tight grip, listening to your screaming for a certain Holy figure and a bunch of affirmative words spilling out of you as he finally finishes licking your chest clean.

“I'm so close.” You manage to announce between your pants. The sweat trickles down from your back, the arch of your posture cooking you. “Let me cum, Juyeon. Please, please, please.”

“If you cum now, I’m cumming inside of you,” A smirk plays on his lips as you roll your eyes, your legs trembling. Juyeon dips his chest down to yours, allowing him to bury himself into your tight body each he’s fully in. “Though it seems like something you want.”

And then…

“Cum for me, you destroyed slut.” 

Juyeon physically feels the way your body loosens, mixing your release with his inside your pussy. The feeling is serene and peaceful, perfect after the seemingly long marathon that always leaves you craving more of him every time. He hums and smiles on your skin with satisfaction when you smile at him after you've fully come down.

With the last few energy in him, he attaches your lips with his, muffling and swallowing your moans as his softened member slowly pulls out while his hand closes on your hole to contain the remnants of his love for you.

“Juyeon?” You ask through your fluttering eyelashes.

He hums, pressing a quick kiss once more before dropping his knees to the ground, worshipping the beautiful mess he created. His opened mouth encircles the opening of your vagina, and his throat sucks you clean.

“Oh.” You gasp out pleasurably, the loose strings being cleaned with just enough pressure. It satisfies you even more when his nose nudges on your overstimulated clit, his tongue swiping across fastly right after to clean the small bit of ice cream that still hung on for him to lick.

Juyeon stands before your tired body, his palms resting on the table next to your waist to support his body and though he broke your body in the best way possible, your elbows successfully bring you closer to him. It amuses you when the redness of his cheeks makes its way onto his face, and you giggle before resting your forehead on his.

“Don't be shy.” You reassure him, arms making their way around his neck. “That was amazing.”

His eyes shape into crescent moons, glad that you enjoyed the moment as much as he did. Juyeon pressed his lips against yours, inviting your own to automatically separate. But just when you could relish the passionate but innocent kiss at what you thought was to be the end of the lust-filled day, Juyeon pushes the mixed juice of your lower bodies into you. His tongue swipes where he can reach and he keeps emptying the load inside his throat into yours, pushing the sweet taste down with the help of gravity when he tilts your head up.

“Happy Birthday to me.” 

Before his hand picks up his straightening cock once more.

navi/masterlist!! 🤍 tags (send a dm/ask if you would like to be here!): @deoboyznet 📢❤️ @k-labels 💙🤍 @k-films 🤎🎞️ @kflixnet 📺🍿@heemingyu @snowflakewhispers

[sangyeonsmuse]

MEDDLE ABOUT | DAY 7

PAIRING Guitarist Sunwoo x interviewer Reader x Drummer Eric

WORD COUNT | 2.4k

GENRE Smut

WARNINGS 18+ MINORS DO NOT INTERACT ‼️ pet names like sweetheart and princess, threesome, double penetration, fingering, degradation, use of the word slut, oral , vaginal, dom sunwoo, dom Eric.

SUMMARY The two decide to take you backstage for a more private interview.

MORE | Day 7 of the Groupie Love Series

You were nothing more than a simple intern so you were shocked to say the least when the day after your company had an opportuned interview with Kim Sunwoo & Sohn Youngjae you received a call from their manager. As per usual, you had been sitting behind your desk as bored as ever, your thoughts interrupted by the phone on your desk ringing, on the other line was none other than the manager of Kim Sunwoo and Sohn Younjae. Your company had had eyes on them for years now, the only company having been persistent in trying to get interviews with them. Usually when it came to interviews either the two of them rarely did them or they were usually always busy, but to your surprise this time their Manager called and asked for you specifically.

“Hello is this yn? The intern from Whisper publishing?”

“Mm yes sir this is she, do you need to be transferred to one of our journalists?”

“Actually you’re exactly who I was looking for, we received the copy of the interview entry and the boys aren’t too pleased with it, would you mind coming in for another interview today?”

“Um i’m sorry sir, but i'm only an intern, I actually have no clearance here at the company for interviews.”

“I’ve actually already spoken with your boss and she’s given us the green light, she thinks it would be a good trial for you and has agreed to let us borrow you for the day, so what do you say?”

Of course you said yes, so now here you were standing in the band's living room awaiting their arrival. You stood there taking in the art on the wall when you heard someone clear their throat behind you pulling your attention away from the art and turning to face the direction from which the noise came.

“You came.” Eric eyes you from head to toe as he slowly but surely makes his way inside the room.

“Of course, I'm sorry to hear that the journal wasn’t to your liking, I’ll try my best to make up for it today.”

“Well isn't that sweet.” Sunwoo makes his appearance only moments later, not even sparing you a glance as he enters.

“Maybe your coworker should have done their job properly yesterday.” His comment had hit a nerve, but this wasn’t the time nor place for you to let your emotion get the best of you, pushing your annoyance deep down you simply ignored his comment.

“Chill, it's not like it was her fault, it isn’t like she was the one interviewing us yesterday.”

“Yeah whatever can we get this over with.”

“Are you always this much of a dick?” The words had spilled from your mouth before you realized, earning a laugh from Eric. Sunwoo on the other hand was not so pleased.

“You should really watch your pretty little mouth.”

“Oh I'm sorry, did that bruise your fragile male ego?”

“Aren’t you an intern sweetheart, shouldn’t you know your place?”

“It’s best to just leave it alone sweetheart.” Eric warns earning an eye roll from you. You were completely fed up. Sunwoo was being a complete dick and they both expected you to just sit and take it?

“Intern or not, does that mean I’m supposed to submit to you and just take whatever the fuck you say to me simply for the sake of my job?”

“You don’t know how to watch your pretty fucking mouth, ill watch it for you then. I’ll make sure you leave here knowing how to speak to us.” Within seconds Sunwoo had been up out of his seat and standing in front of you. His hands were squeezing your face as you looked to Eric to stop him.

“Aw look at how she looks at you Youngjae, so cute you think he’ll help you when he’s just as bad as me sweetheart. He's the reason you’re here right Youngjae, seeing you in that white button up and cute little skirt yesterday I guess he couldn’t resist inviting you today.” Sunwoos hands rubbed your waist.

“Guess the secrets out then hm?” Eric sits back in his seat as he watches Sunwoo practically man handle you.

This very situation was something you hadn’t really seen yourself getting into, never had you thought you’d be standing here in their living room one towering over you while the other just watched intently. Sunwoos' voice and the words he spoke were immediately blocked out when his hand met your waist. Feeling his fingers brush across your skin you realized his touch immediately made your brain check out. Your own thoughts now in the clouds rather than your full attention having been on the two of them and getting them to stop. It wasn’t until you felt a tap on your thigh that you were pulled from your thoughts and back into the present.

“Hey sweetheart, you know you really should pay attention when spoken to, another lesson we’ll have to teach her.’’ Sunwoo places a finger beneath your chin forcing you to look at the two of them.

“Much better right Youngjae?’’ Sunwoo turns and shares a knowing gaze with Eric before his gaze shifts back to you. A glimmer in his eyes that had many unspoken desires hidden deep beneath them.

“Well, Since I'm caught there's no reason to play the nice card.” Eric chuckles and gets up from his place on the couch.

“But if you still want me to save you sweetheart I wouldn’t mind keeping you to myself.” Now there you stood trapped in between the two of them, you opened your mouth to speak, wanting to tell both of them off and curse them out for being such obnoxious assholes, but your body was betraying you.

“Nothing to say now sweetheart? You were so mouthy a few moments ago, we should teach her when to speak and when not to speak.” Sunwoos fingers slipped beneath your skirt, hooking his fingers around your panties he pulled them to the side and immediately buried his fingers inside your clit.

“I think she likes it, how pathetic.” Eric laughs and watches the way your face contorts upon feeling Sunwoos fingers enter you.

“What’s pathetic is you ignoring me here for some sick fucking fantasy.” You finally managed to choke out earning a laugh from him and Sunwoo.

“Oooo, so so mouthy, Guess I’ll have to stuff that pretty mouth and fuck it until you learn the way to speak to me.” Eric's gaze suddenly darkened as he looked down at you, any sign of his previous niceness having disappeared from his face.

Mere minutes later Eric was sitting back on the couch, fingers tangled within your hair as he watched the way your lips wrapped around his cock. He couldn't help but admire the way you looked at him like you absolutely hated him. Eyes full of tears, a face stained of makeup now ruined as he forced the entirety of his cock down your throat. Meanwhile Sunwoo seemed to have the most satisfying view, You legs spread wide as he had you bent over, breasts falling loosely from your lifted shirt as he filled you up from behind. His eyes traced her every curve. From the dip in your back to the curves of your waist, but the main visual was getting to watch the way his cock so easily pushed past your folds until he was completely bottomed out inside of you, your tight grip around him immediately pulling a groan from his lips.

“Fuck, if you keep clenching so much you’ll be full a lot faster than you should be sweetheart.’’ Sunwoo groans as he rests his hands on her your waist and his head falls back.

Eric gazes down at you, eyes full of hunger, he wanted to ravish you, to make sure every time you interviewed anyone else after this you’d think of them and the way they ruin you. Placing his hand beneath your chin he presses his thumb down against your bottom lip, not missing the way drool spilled down past your lips and chin as his grip on your hair tightened and he began to thrust further into your throat. Every gag and choke that came spilling from your lips made him eager to hear more of it.

“I knew those lips were good for something. Cant talk back with your pretty mouth stuffed full of my cock can you hm.?” He grunts as he feels your tongue graze his cock, he could never forget the way you had entered the room during the first meeting with your company your lips perfectly glossy and so plump, the moment you entered the room he found himself fantasizing about having your plump lips wrapped around him taking every inch of him without mercy.

It made him crazy, the moment he pulled his cock from the depths of your throat and he heard a soft gag spill from your lips.

“Are you gonna behave sweetheart?’’ Eric couldbt help but take you like art, looking up at him with your tear stained face and swollen lips.

“You're such a pervert.” A moan spills from your lips interrupting whatever it was you were prepared to say, Eric didn’t mind that he was enjoying you struggle with your words, enjoying how mouthy and disobedient you were when it came to talking back to them.

“Am i baby? Am i a pervert when you’re sitting here like a pretty little doll taking both our cocks like a good girl? Let’s not act like you don’t like being stuffed in both your pretty holes. Go ahead and show us your true colors sweetheart, go on.” He was right, he was completely right, as mouthy as you had been the entire time you citizen denied that now it was all for show. You loved it, loved being put in your place, loved them both filling you up and fucking the brat out of you, and Eric saw right through you.

Eric simply sits back and lets you take over, his eyes watching you intently as you gazed at him with such intimate eyes while working your tongue over his tip and shoving his entire cock back into your mouth, the force of Sunwoos thrust forcing him even further down your throat. Sunwoos cock shoved so deep into your cunt you’d have sworn you were seeing stars especially as his fingers met your clit. He rubbed rough circles against you as he watched how his entire cock pushed in and out of you with ease from how wet you were. He didn’t miss the way your legs trembled or how youd desperately fuck back against him which needless to say brought a smirk to his lips. Your moans were swallowed back up as you made sure Eric was also well taken care of in front of you.

“Such a needy little slut, Supposed to be here for an interview and you’re so pathetically taking both our cocks. How unprofessional.’’ Eric's gaze had lingered on you long enough to know that you were reaching your limit, too bad even when you surpassed that limit they didn't plan on being done with you.

“Shit she’s clenching so fucking tight” Sunwoo grunts, his nails digging into the skin of your hips earning a soft cry from you that set a fire in their eyes. As the two of them were closing in on their release it seemed the both of them grew rougher with you, as if competing with one another to see who could tire you out best. Each thrusting into you with rough and merciless thrusts of their hips until both your mouth and cunt were full to the brim with their cum. Eric pulls out with a heavy breath and you are given no time to breathe as you’re immediately yanked into Erics lap and Sunwoo now towered over you. With no warning Eric pulls your hands behind your back and holds your wrists together as he shoves into you making you let out a loud cry. Now you were being stretched out for the second time that night, your sensitivity of having been fucked by Sunwoo combined with Eric now stretching you out made your legs go numb and your eyes roll back. Sunwoo took in the dazed and fucked out look on your face with pride as he forced your head up by pulling your hair back. In no time he had you sticking out your tongue to take him down your throat without him ever having to order you.

“Look at that, such a good girl when you want to be’’ Sunwoo coos as he wraps his fists around your hair, his muscles bulging as he forces your hair into a ponytail and tugs your head forward before forcing his cock down your throat, not missing the gags that spill from your lips before you finally hollow out your cheeks to help you take it. The vibrations of your mouth seem to have quite the effect on him as they immediately provoke a moan to spill from his lips. All while Eric guides the rotation of your hips in his lap, his fingers playing with your nipples as if strumming the strings of a guitar. His hips bumping against your ass with each thrust, the sounds of moans and heavy breathing filled the room as they both drilled into you. Eric found delight in watching the way you bounced in his lap, while hearing the sweet sound of your pleasured cries as they both fucked some manners into you.

Both of them loved the way you seemed to fall apart, that mouthy woman from moments ago seeming to have gone away as you sat between the two of them taking their cocks like an obedient little thing. With a loud groan Eric forces you further down onto his cock, pressing his hips against your bare ass as he shoots his cum deep inside your cunt completely coating her walls. Sunwoo ,wasn’t too far behind, his cum spilling deep into the canal of your throat.

“Look at how good you are when you just sit and listen.” Eric chuckles as he spreads your folds apart with his fingers watching how both he and Sunwood cum came spilling out of you.

“I don’t mind her being a brat we’ll just have to fuck it out of her over and over again.”