#the amazing tales of max and liz

[kpopandbookschild]

Book poll round 1 #3

[zannolin]

there's a lot of really unhinged christian fiction books out there (like case in point the copious amounts of knight allegories and also the dragon jesus king arthur abomination of a series i'm still not over) but i think the most ridiculous (to me) was the amazing tales of max and liz series which is about a group of immortal house pets (yes, i know) who originally went to go get on noah's ark and ended up you know immortal and on a mission from god time traveling throughout history (yes. i know) like, assisting significant biblical figures and stuff. and also there was a mouse who invented glasses and had a violin they made from a sign nailed to the cross on which jesus was crucified. (i cannot stress how much i wish i was making this up.)

that was a thing that i read growing up. religiously, even, no pun intended. and people wonder why i turned out this way.

[stargazer-luna]

I HAVE A BOOK SERIES THAT IS SIMILAR TO THIS!

Ok so, the main characters are technically talking, immortal animals, BUT it's really good Historical Fantasy Fiction.

Books one and two are under: The Amazing Tales of Max and Liz

Book 1:

Obviously about Noah's Ark but from the animal's pov (ignore my legs)

Book 2:

Joseph and the Coat of Many Colors

The rest of the series is under: The Epic Order of the Seven

Book 3:

This one has 3 parts: Isaiah, Daniel, and then Jesus' Birth

Now here's where it gets interesting...

Book 4:

This one is kinda crazy. So, we start out with a huuuuuuuge timeskip to the story of Handel trying to find a new Oratorio to compose. The Epic Order of the 7 are trying to help him get his mojo back bc he is severely depressed. They manage to get him to start writing the Messiah, but something just isn't right. So they get to travel back in time and relive their lives with Jesus! And then it follows Jesus' life and ministry. At the end of the story, they go back to Handel, and help him write His greatest masterpiece, including the Hallelujah Chorus! (Very confusing, I know.)

Book 5:

Now we go back to the Acts! (The thing with Handel was setting up plot points for later...) this is only part 1 of 2, but it is SUPER good...

Book 6:

Part 2 of the Acts (and mentions John's time on Patmos). Now something interesting, is that in Book 3, they bring a Roman family into play. Book 6 has the 4th generation of that family. It follows them as well as the Disciples

Book 7:

Part 1 of 3 of the Revolutionary War Trilogy. I swear, I learned soooooo much about Patrick Henry, George Washington, and King George the 3rd... but mainly Patrick Henry. That whole plot with Handel had a few sideplots setting up this story! (And that Roman family comes into play again...)

Book 8:

Part 2 of 3. They changed the artstyle 😭😭😭... anyways, still as EPIC as ever! (See what I did there? Lol). There was a thing where none of them could figure out who the traitor was, and there was this one dude I didn't like (even though he legit wasn't sus in any way shape or form) and it turns out that he was the traitor lol. I was proud of myself...

There has been a VBS based off of the series, and there was a really neat writing camp with the results in a published book:

Anyways, part 3 of the Revolutionary War Trilogy hasn't come out yet, BUT! It also ties in to one of the World Wars and they get to help freakin' C.S. LEWIS AND I AM SO EXCITED BC THE ANIMALS CAN TALK AND THAT WAS PROBABLY WHERE HE GOT HIS INSPIRATION FOR NARNIA IN THIS UNIVERSE AND AKKSNDNXJXJXHSJSNXJJXJDJDJXJJX

*clears throat* Sorry about that

This series will make you Laugh, Cry, and want to throw it across the room. You get to see the sides of Biblical figures that you never get to from just reading the Bible! Think The Chosen, but for kids 😁

YOU NEED TO CHECK IT OUT!

Also, I would watch the Heck out of that show you had the idea for lol

Have I pitched my Acts sitcom to you guys yet? I don’t think so.

Basically, I want a sitcom made based on the book of Acts with a combination of Christian and secular writers and creatives. Preferably a few of the Christians will have served as committee members in some capacity in their local churches. The goal, essentially, is to riff on the human messiness and frequent absurdity of the early church with good humor and some irreverence, but never with God or the Gospel as the butt of the joke.

Characters:

Peter is the young, energetic guy who suddenly has Administrative Responsibilities. He’s energized by his evangelism/discipleship work, but he’s always Tired and Unwell while trying to manage the leadership of the church.  

John is overly affectionate. He’s always hugging people he barely knows, giving people really enthusiastic compliments, that sort of thing.

Luke is quiet and nerdy, maybe even a little nebbish. When he speaks, it’s usually to ask people vaguely uncomfortable questions “for his book.” If you want to go mocumentary style with the show, Luke’s interviews can be the framing device.

Paul is generally a pretty chill guy, but he’s super gung-ho about suffering for the Gospel. People are a little weirded out his wannabe martyr energy.

John Mark is really, really annoying in some way. Like maybe he’s always playing his original music on the lyre and he’s really bad at it. Maybe he’s really flakey and irresponsible and sort of has Jean-Ralphio energy. Paul, in particular, finds him really annoying and always looks absolutely miserable when they’re in a scene together. When Barnabas eventually suggests bringing John Mark on a missionary journey, the “sharp disagreement” is just Paul going “oh hell no” and walking straight out of the room.

Lots of women and people of different races represented, particularly as church members. Lydia should be a major character, although I don’t quite know what her personality should be. Rhoda (the servant who slammed the door in Peter’s face) would be a fun inclusion too. Racial diversity should at least reflect the actual ancient Mediterranean, although I don’t think I’d be super picky about which specific characters are which races.

Ongoing plots:

The organizational nightmares of running a church is a running theme. Basically just crib from the funniest parts of church government and organization. Things are poorly run and disorganized and people have different opinions and everything somehow still gets done. This stuff can have Parks and Rec energy.

Lots of conflict of personality issues, but also an increasing closeness between the Apostles and members of the church  

Lots of missionaries getting run out of town in increasingly comedic ways. Like, I want Paul and Barnabas running out of Random Roman City #52 while getting pelted with eggs.

Lots of what I can only describe as late night theology. Like when you’re sleep deprived and discussing the deep questions of Scripture with your friends in the car, often arriving at weird conclusions. Lots of that kind of stuff. Also, in general, the characters talk about God the way Christians actually do– casually, often humorously, sometimes irreverently, as an important part of life and not just a serious subject for Important Conversations

Paul’s Roman Citizenship is milked for all it’s worth. Yes, it gets him out of imprisonment and torture, but it also gets him out of like, minor municipal violations.

Episode plots:

Philip finds himself teleported to/from Ethiopia to convert the eunuch and, upon returning to Jerusalem, spends an episode getting startled by sudden movement (knocking things over, accidentally slapping people) because he thinks he’s gonna get teleported again. There’s a long scene where Philip tries to interrogate Peter and find out if teleportation is just like a standard Holy Spirit powerup or if it was a one-time deal. Peter’s just getting progressively more and more confused.

Saul’s conversion from Ananias’s perspective. He’s woken up in the middle of the night and told to go pick Saul the Murder up and take him home. He’s sleep-deprived and low-key freaking out and he hasn’t gone grocery shopping so he’s running around trying to find some food for Saul at 2am. Episode ends with Ananias collapsed sideways on his bed and Paul coming and pulling a blanket over him.

Extended physical comedy scene where they’re lowering Paul over the wall in the basket, but the ropes are uneven and he’s getting tossed from side to side and the guy at the bottom isn’t in place yet and they’re all trying really hard to be inconspicuous.

There’s a whole road episode where it’s just everyone cooped up on a ship or in the middle of the desert or something while they’re on their way to spread the gospel in a new city.  They all get on each others nerves. Somebody goes a little bit stir-crazy and loses it.

The show shouldn’t be ashamed that it’s about people spreading the Gospel, but I don’t want lots of scenes that try to evangelize the viewer. We’re not trying to proselytize, we’re trying to make light of the human messiness that is life in the church. Embrace anachronism (I’d love to see some modern church potlucks, for example), but also lots of nerdy historical and Biblical/theological jokes.

There’s such a dearth of genuinely funny Christian entertainment, particularly that which (a) is entertaining to seculars as well and (b) actually embraces the Bible and not just some form of cultural Christianity. And Acts is right there! It’s hilarious! Top tier sitcom material! Somebody fund me.

@citrussunrises other friends, anything to add?

[lambourngb]

day 1 who do you think you are - character recs

Creator’s Week 2021 for @roswellnewmexicocreate - Day 1 : Character Recs

This is my favorite fandom event, and my third year doing it. The last year was really difficult, and fanfic more than ever was my escape from it.  Shout out to all the writers, commenters, and lurkers who kept fandom going during it.

Rosa Ortecho:

heal it or break it all apart by @adiwriting​ : (7,600) All Rosa’s ever done is break things. Her entire life she’s destroyed everything she’s ever touched. So it’s really no surprise when she comes back that her powers do the same. Alternatively- 4 times somebody tries to get Rosa to seek help with her powers and one time she decides to help herself.  GEN

why i like it: I pretty much love whatever Britt writes, but in the light of how season 3 is going, I found myself returning to this fic more than a few times. She really captures the fierce but vulnerable Rosa in this beautifully.

Kyle Valenti:

at every occasion i’ll be ready for a funeral by @bydayornight  (1,330) Kyle goes on a vacation after the events of 3x04 and meets an unlikely beach companion. GEN

why i like it: Christine has become one of my new favorite writers, and has been a season 3 coda writing machine. Here is where we all would like Kyle to be - lounging on a beach without a care in the world (with that RNM twist! lol)  She also does a brilliant job with the Kyle and Michael vibes here.

Maria Deluca:

Butter(bar)flies by @andrea-lyn​ (4,447) When all of Maria’s people fly away for new opportunities, she needs to find new ones. The lost decade and what should have been. MILUCA

why i like it: Manda has written some of my favorite stories, and even has dragged me into Ted Lasso, but this little lost decade AU is one of my favorites. She captures the flirty vibe of season 1 Michael/Maria, and inserts it into a time when it really makes sense to me for that a friends-with-benefits-relationship should have begun, to give weight to a choice for Michael. Maria is wonderfully characterized here, and it really makes it clear how a real love triangle should have been structured.

Liz Ortecho:

heart of lightning (a roswellian tale) by @bitch-ass-aliens​ (20,095) When Ser Elizabeth Ortecho of the Roswellian Court is sent by Queen Isobel to retrieve the heart of the missing King Maxwell from a fearsome lightning dragon guarding it, she knows success could bring her one step closer to completing a quest of her own. Ten years ago, a mage named Ophiuchus curse her sister with eternal slumber, and Liz has been searching for him ever since. Saving the king could be the key to learning Ophiuchus's true identity and saving Rosa. But the dragon is not what it appears to be. Soon Liz finds herself needing to guard her heart from feelings forgotten long ago as she and her friends journey back to Roswell, King Max by their side, with more than just the fate of Rosa hanging in the balance. For Ophiuchus's plans are bigger and more dangerous than any of them realize. ECHO

why i like it: This was part of the RNM Big Bang last year and as a fellow participant, I did my best to read and feedback the other submissions, which meant reading something that wasn’t Malex 😂🤯 - suz made it easy, writing a beautifully detailed medieval AU that retold the story of Rosa, Noah, and Max’s S1 sacrifice, through the amazing POV of Ser Liz. This story had everything I love about Liz- her devotion to her family, her bravery in doing hard things, and her love for Max.

Max Evans:

highway to the sun by @angsty-nerd​  (22,236) Noah’s heart is failing, and Max is on the verge of death. His final wish is to see Liz one last time, so he and Michael road trip to Los Angeles so that Max can say his goodbyes. ECHO

why i like it: Another part of the 2020 RNM Big Bang - Instead of a focus on Liz in this Echo story, we’re deep in the psyche of Max Evans, who is trying to tie up loose ends before he dies. I love the atmosphere of the road trip, the sadness of the clock that Max is trying to run out, and the whole Michael/Max brotherly bond in this story. It’s got all the sweet elements of some of my favorite romantic dramas - like “Beaches” or “Dying Young”, but mixed with the sci fi of RNM. Even though it was written pre-season 3, I really love how it ties up season 2 here.

Alex Manes:

i’m just like my mother, we both love to run @meneatyoghurt​ (5,211) After what his dad does, he runs and runs and runs. A look at Alex's relationship with running, from track and field to leaving Roswell. MALEX IMPLIED

why i like it: Alex is one of my favorite characters on RNM, mostly because of how hard he tries in spite of his flaws. I love a good story that focuses on why it’s a struggle for Alex to be present, and doesn’t shy away from the fallout of his actions. This is a gorgeous look into Alex and his tendency to run to feel safe, and how that affects his relationships, and why he wants to stop. I just have a lot of feelings about Alex, especially after reading this.

Michael Guerin : 

looking for yourself out there by @haloud (6,670)  It’s early; it’s a weeknight. Michael can only be here to get blasted or for Marco himself, and both of them know it.It’s been a while since this was a game, for Michael. The flirting he did with Maria was something else, a class all her own. Sex, and the lead up to sex, for the longest time was either life-or-death or it was a helpless, hopeless lashing out for any human contact. (It was either Alex, or it was Maria, or it wasn’t.)So this is nice. MICHAEL/OTHER

why i like it: I privately think hal understands Michael Guerin like no other, and their fic is just a delight for anyone who wants to look under that macho cowboy exterior to see him. One of the things we both agree on as Michael Guerin fans, is that Alex is not the male exception for Michael. And while the show will probably never deliver a Michael/OMC storyline like they have with Max/Jenna, Isobel/Blair, Liz/Heath, Alex/Forrest - that’s what fanfic is for and this story is so satisfiying. If you don’t come away from this story loving Marco and wishing he was real... I don’t know what to tell you. I was so inspired by it, I wrote my own Michael/OMC story.

Isobel Evans:

future starts slow by @foramomentonly​ (4,799) The bartop is sticky, but Maria's skin is clean and soft.This is how it starts. Brushes of fingers as Maria passes over a glass of wine; her cool, dry hand cupping Isobel's wrist as she reads her palm; Isobel's fingertips pressed to Maria's temples, wisps of curls caught around her knuckles as they practice combining their powers. MARIBEL

why i like it: It’s just facts that Maria and Isobel have incredible chemistry, their banter is off the charts, and I love this sexy story of Isobel approaching Maria for more after they’ve been circling each other for a while. It’s a gorgeous look at two strong women who very rarely let down their guards, but for each other, they do. The sex is really hot, but I think what lingers most with me is how this story rewards the swan dive of hope, Isobel after a lifetime of “being who she should be” becomes who she wants to be, a woman who loves fiercely but not destructively. Of course, Maria is no wilting flower here, which makes it all the sweeter.

If you like any of these recs, please leave a comment on the story- a ‘this was awesome’ is enough to propell an author into the stratosphere with happiness, so don’t worry about coming up with a unique, never before shared insight- sometimes a keyboard smash and emogi makes all the difference! 

[dakotasgreenkitchen]

Series Review 2.

Title: The Handmaid’s Tale

Starring: Elisabeth Moss, Yvonne Strahovski, Samira Wiley, Madeline Brewer, Ann Dowd, Joseph Fienes, Max Minghella, OT Fagbenle

Directed: Liz Garbus/Reed Morano/Elisabeth Moss

Plot: The Handmaid's Tale is the story of life in the dystopia of Gilead, a totalitarian society in what was the United States. Gilead is ruled by a fundamentalist regime that treats women as property of the state, and is faced with environmental disasters and a plummeting birth rate. (Via IMDb)

Where to watch and prices:

Hulu- Subscription required or free trial.

Personal Opinion: I truly enjoy the Handmaid’s Tale. Margaret Atwood’s mind never ceases to amaze me. This is NOT suitable for young viewers. it depicts scenes of r*pe, torture, hanging and brutal scenes that can trigger or disturb many. If you are mentally and emotionally mature I highly recommend it. But you have to pay attention while you watch because there are lots of small details you can miss. Elisabeth and the entire cast are such power houses with emotion and dramatic effect. I began watching it when it came out in 2017 and it is still my favorite show to this day.

Overall: 9.6/10

[goddamnelsa]

Liz’s Top Books of 2020

blatantly stolen from @alamorn but also i wanted to feel accomplished that i did in fact read published books this year before descending entirely into mdzs/the untamed fanfiction :) :) :) :)

In two parts! Books I read that actually came out in 2020, and then honorable mentions of books I read in 2020 that were published in previous years. Enjoy!

Top Books Published in 2020 (which are not in any kind of order because I can’t like rank stuff, I’m not that kind of person)

The City We Became by N.K. Jemisin

What can I say except it’s N.K. Jemisin who wrote my favorite high fantasy series (The Inheritance Trilogy), won three consecutive Hugo Awards for her The Broken Earth trilogy, and she’s writing urban fantasy with Lovecraftian and superhero team flavor. I mean....obviously I was at the top of the wait list for this once my library ordered it. And it lived up to the hype!! Because of course!! It’s fabulously fast-paced with amazingly smart and interesting characters of diverse backgrounds. I kept thinking one of them was my favorite, and then another would have a great line and I would change my mind. It’s fine, they’re all technically one entity with several parts, so I can love them all and not choose (but it’s probably Bronca, let’s be real). And it’s the first of a series! And I’m counting down the days til there is more!

Axiom’s End by Lindsay Ellis

I definitely picked this up simply because Lindsay Ellis, one of my favorite video essayists, wrote it, and then ended up loving everything about it. I’m not usually one for First Contact stories, but I appreciate the very human-focused approach here, sticking solely to an ordinary girl’s perspective as she navigates being the person first in contact with a very alien alien. Cora’s attempts to humanize Ampersand are relatable, but I appreciate Ellis reminding us at almost every turn that Ampersand is super Not Human, no matter how much Cora reads into his actions. Ellis doesn’t gloss over the Science part either, especially when it comes to the race of aliens Ampersand belongs to. Again, the first of a series, and you will absolutely be screaming for the next book when this one is over.

You Had Me At Hola by Alexis Daria

Insert my obligatory “I don’t usually read romances blah blah blah.” Though, during lockdown, I attempted to branch out beyond my usual genres when I was attending a ton of publisher webinars about upcoming books. This one stood out to me because of its Latinx cast and the whole behind-the-scenes of a Jane The Virgin-esque show, based on a telenovela (of course). It is fantastic, a quick read with instantly likable and fun characters. And the tropes! We’re playing love interests but we have insane chemistry! A sensitive, traumatized male lead who learns to open up again! A sassy but insecure female lead who learns to let loose and love again! Hooking up, but we have to keep on the DL or else scandal! And of course, the extended families add to every scene they are in--I loved every interaction Ashton and Jasmine had with their families, it was the cherry on top of a fantastic read. Also the sex scenes are steamy. 

Beetle and the Hollowbones by Aliza Layne

I got this graphic novel as an advanced reader copy well before it came out, and after reading it, I was sCREAMING because I couldn’t tell all my graphic novel, queer coming-of-age-with-magic loving friends to immediately pick up a copy!! So thankfully, it’s out now, so I can scream to the heavens to please read this!!! It is such a sweet story with beautiful full-color art and fantastic world-building. It has the same silly, referential humor you see in a lot of kids/YA graphic novels these days, but Beetle packs in a lot of heart as well. 

Stamped: Racism, Antiracism, and You by Jason Reynolds and Ibram X. Kendi

Like many people in May/June of this year, I was reading, reading, reading a lot of books about racism from as many Black authors as I could get my hands on. There were many not published this year that should definitely be read (So You Want To Talk About Race by Ijeoma Oluo being among the top), but this book really stuck with me because it is written specifically for a younger audience, and Jason Reynolds knows how to talk to kids about tough subjects. Stamped gets across difficult concepts like assimilationists and segregationists in an easy-to-understand, conversational style that doesn’t take away from any of the important history and nuance. This certainly is not The Book of antiracism studies, but it is a good starting point if you are daunted by lengthy title lists and aren’t sure where to begin. I highly recommend the audiobook as well, read by Reynolds himself.

(Side note: I watched this keynote address with Reynolds and Kendi which is an excellent primer into the background of how this book came to be. Reynolds is also just very interesting to listen to)

Honorable Mentions aka Books I read in 2020 that were published in previous years again, not ranked because I CAN’T, OKAY

White Is For Witching by Helen Oyeyemi

I read this book and then wanted to go back and read it immediately again, not necessarily because it was so amazing, but because I felt like I would get it even more if I did. This is a haunting little book that took turns I was not expecting, even with the book synopsis I read. It is disturbing and features descriptions of an eating disorder, so proceed with caution. However, if you like Gothic tales of haunted houses and the trauma inflicted on us by those who came before, I can’t recommend this one enough.

Gods of Jade and Shadow by Silvia Moreno-Garcia

My last book club read before the pandemic D: We didn’t actually get to meet to discuss this book, but my club (all librarians) were working at our emergency call center at the same time and all reading it, so we KINDA got to discuss it, if not in a formal book club setting. ANYWAY, it’s a thrilling jaunt through 1920s Mexico, following a fantastic Cinderella-esque heroine who makes a deal with a Mayan god to retrieve his body. If you are a fan of the Percy Jackson-brand of mythological adventures, this is definitely one to add to your list, especially if you are looking for something a little bit more Adult.

Scary Stories for Young Foxes by Christian McKay Heidicker

Okay, I know it’s a young readers/middle grade book, but HEAR ME OUT. This is whimsical and haunting tale about seven little fox kits who set out to scare themselves shitless by hearing scary tales. Only one kit will remain when the night is over, but the one who does will get to hear a surprisingly sweet, and well-earned, happy ending. If you are a Neil Gaiman-esque horror fan, I recommend picking this up. Its scares are fairly scary, especially for its audience, but it’s an engaging story about the lengths we will go for the ones we love.

Trail of Lightning by Rebecca Roanhorse

Did someone say Navajo monster-hunting heroine with magic powers navigating a post-apocalyptic world, oh and also saving it??? Look, Maggie is My Kind of Hero, in that she’s damaged, she drinks too much, she’s surly, but she has a seriously gooey heart of gold underneath all that armor. Navajo mythology is woven into this tale of monster-hunting, surviving. If you’re in Supernatural-disappointment-land, maybe give this a try! It has that Western-y, road trip feel to it, and again, I love the lead character. (It also has a currently published sequel and a soon-to-be-released third book as well!)

This is How You Lose The Time War by Amal El-Mohtar and Max Gladstone

This was rec’ed to me by a librarian friend, with the words, “Oh, Liz, you’ll really like this.” And she was RIGHT. Red and Blue are on opposite sides of a war waged across time and decide to send letters to each other, at first, to taunt, but then, to understand, to learn, and to love. The details of the war don’t matter much, but what does matter is the achingly beautiful poetry with which Red and Blue reveal themselves to each other. I was told to listen to this one, but I’m glad I read it myself instead. The prose is very purple at times, and I appreciated being able to go back to passages to reread again and again. Oh, and it’s queer (Red and Blue are both female), and SPOILERS SPOILERS has a happy ending. 

(also there is a wangxian remix for my mdzs buds. and also a semi-officially sanctioned fanfic sequel???? at least amal el-mohtar linked it from goodreads so whoo! also also it’s very funny)

And that’s my Year in Books 2020! Seeing it laid out like this, I had a surprisingly good year for book reading even though I felt like I barely read anything. For awhile, reading was Hard, and I just wanted to consume fluffy, sweet fanfiction, but I’m getting back into it. Oh, and please let me know if you check any of these out!

Here’s to a good year for books in 2021! ✨

[rnmsmalltownlegends]

For today’s rec list, we’re promoting the recently completed Alternate Roswell event @alterarnm​!

chasing behind smoke

T | @lire-casander​ | Michael Guerin/Alex Manes

Sir Alexander Manes never thought he would end up fighting dragons for his brother.

Why We Love It: This is a fun little tale set in ambiguously medieval times where a knight Alex goes to help his brother find his bride in a castle guarded by a dragon, so obviously it’s fun based on premise alone. But on top of that, it just has a nice atmosphere of Alex being his honorable self alongside his friends. It’s a lovely read with a happy, twist ending that I don’t want to give away! Absolutely go give it a read for yourself!

Western Moodboard

Unrated | @manesalex​ | Jenna Cameron/Liz Ortecho & Maria DeLuca/Isobel Evans

Why We Love It: A simple moodboard really can go a long way and this one does the trick. It’s all colored in neutral tones and solely focused on the women of Roswell which is something everyone needs to look at because I mean come on have you seen them. The whole look of it is very aesthetically pleasing and it’s nicely paired with a little summary of a story of the women in Roswell banding together to look for Rosa. Definitely go give it some love!

The Goddamn Sky High AU

M | @brightloveee​ | Michael Guerin/Alex Manes (technically)

Alex started his senior year of Super-Powered high school 5000% over it. There was nothing in this entire world he wanted to do less than go back to Sky High School for Super-Powered Students ever again. Yet here he was.

Why We Love It: Okay, listen, I’ve been excited about this since it was mentioned, so you can imagine my excitement when I saw it. It’s simply the beginning to so much more, but it’s still a great place to kick off. We learn mainly about Alex in this and about his struggles with being the son of a superhero, being surrounded by superheros, and having literally nothing to show for it. It’s amazing, go read!

If I go crazy, then will you still call me Superman?

T | @salmonthestoryteller​ | Maria DeLuca/Isobel Evans

The three from the bar had stumbled out the front, and the one with the gun aimed it at them - firing off two shots that somehow missed.

“He’s going to bring the undead for miles.” Isobel hissed in irritation.

“Dammit, I needed those supplies.” Maria slammed her hand on the wheel in frustration.

“You needed liquor?” Isobel gave her an unimpressed look.

“It’s the apocalypse, you think people don’t like to drink?” Maria countered.

“Well, sure, if they can find it. Wait, are you saying-?”

“The Wild Pony? Bar and Trading Post? Maybe you’ve heard of it, if you’ve talked to anyone in recent years. Or were you too busy honing your mysterious skills on a mountain somewhere?”

Why We Love It: This is a short little story of an apocalyptic future where Maria, who runs The Wild Pony as a trading post, has people come in and Isobel basically saves the day after being gone for awhile. It’s a rushed reunion in the face of literal danger which obviously leaves sets the stage for flirty banter and a quick catching up on their situation. It’s short and sweet and fun, I absolutely recommend!

Area 51

G | @pancakepapi58​ | Maria Deluca/Michael Guerin, Max Evans/Liz Ortecho

1975, Area 51 Roller Rink

Why We Love It: This is a cute little alternative story about life in the 70s. Young teenage couples wear the decade’s signature looks, and run around a skating rink. The author uses the setting to tell a story and wow does it tell - not just one story, but two stories of young love. Just starting.

And we deserve much better than we’ve had (I wanna love you good), Part 2

T | @manesalex​ | Michael Guerin/Alex Manes

After escaping the naval ship together, Michael tries to keep Alex alive and with him.

Why We Love It: In another world, and in another time, Michael and Alex grew up together. This is a story of two boys growing up and growing close, against the backdrop of that age old rivalry - navy man and a pirate! The author doesn’t waste time establishing how strong Michael and Alex’s bond is, and let’s face it - we all want to see Michael Guerin as a pirate in love

Every single day of forever

T | @lire-casander | Max Evans/Liz Ortecho

When Liz moves with his family to Roswell, she expected for it to be full of rumors about aliens. She never expected to encounter vampires.

Why We Love It: This fic combines two of our favorite things - a badass Liz Ortecho, and the phenomenon known as Twilight books. The author expertly mixes the in character strength that Liz possesses in canon, with the vulnerability that the Twilight stories demanded of its heroine. Max Evans as a sparkly vampire is also an image that won’t be leaving us for a long time!

I wish that I could let you love (me)

E | @signoraviolettavalery​ | Michael Guerin/Alex Manes

Earth, which has been fighting a decades-long war against the Wraith that they are slowly losing, comes to Antar for an alliance. There is strength in uniting against a common foe, they suggest.

According to Antaran tradition, such an alliance must be sealed with a marriage.

Enter Alex Manes, decorated soldier and and military hero, recently injured in battle and struggling to find his place in a war he can no longer fight in.

Why We Love It: This story caught our eye as a unique setting - arranged marriage in space! The story has it all - an interplanetary war, the pod squad as alien royalty, and Alex Manes as the only valid man on Earth. The arranged marriage trope adds another layer of complexity which only makes Michael and Alex coming together as the cosmically connected couple they are, even richer.

[the-whole-long-stupid-story]

Roswell Post-Graduation Fic Rec

Okay, if you have never found the perfect post-S3 Roswell fanfic that deals with a bunch of their loose ends in a realistic-yet-uniquely-Roswell type of way, I would HIGHLY recommend giving A Tale of Two Christmases by KindredKandies a go. KindredKandies is the handle for two awesome authors from the Roswell fic universe - ArchAngel1973 and Marsis - that have paired up to pen this amazing novel-length fic. The way they interpret some of the events from the series is bloody awesome, they allow the characters to work through a lot of their problems, they tie up some loose ends, and of course the gang have a lot of fun too (despite the seriousness of the situation, obvs).

It’s canon couples (well...it hints strongly at an eventual Kyle / Isabel pairing, but I feel that that was hinted at in canon in S3 anyway), and it’s definitely skewed a little more centrally towards Michael and Maria, but actually there’s heaps of Max/Liz too.

Do it do it do it ✌🏼

[andrea-lyn]

@bellakitse tagged me in this and I think I need to do this for my own reminder that I don’t suck and I’ve done some good things. 

rules: it’s time to love yourselves! choose your 5 favourite works you created in the past year (fics, art, edits, etc) and link them below to reflect on the amazing things you’ve brought into the world. tag as many writers/artists/etc as you want (fan or original) so we can spread the love and link each other to awesome works!

so in the last year, I’ve written 600k - the majority being RNM, with some H50 and Magnificent Seven in there for good measure. of the last year, I’m proudest of these five:

1. No Love Like Your Love - Michael/Alex, an AU in which Michael is a space prince who comes to live on earth when he’s sixteen and falls in love. @hazel-athena is the reason this exists because I was sitting in my hotel room in Franz Josef after 1x12 and I just wanted Michael and his Mom being royalty and Alex being their human puppy. It was going to be a 6000 word thing and then I expanded a little, then more, and then more, and...well, it’s one of my happy feel-good verses and I love it

2. die knowing your life was my life’s best part - post 1x12 canon compliant gen - hey remember that room in Franz Josef? I also wrote this one there, while weeping, and writing a coda after I watched it in that glorious place. Looking back, a LOT of my fic was either conceived or written on that trip, which sort of ties it together with that amazing time in my life. ANYWAY, this one was just a coda about Alex and Michael’s mother and the concept of MIchael being loved, and I am proud of it because it made me weep

3. every traveler, please come home - Michael/Alex, Max/Liz, Isobel/Rosa - it’s groundhog day, but when I took it on, I knew I wanted to do something different and I loved the idea of the people in the loop with you also remembering after, but also the parallel timelines. I also wrote this one post s1 finale and wanted some catharsis

4. The Tale is The Same (Told Before, Told Again) - McDanno - I can’t believe I finished this one. I had the plot for YEARS and I still was getting comments asking for another installment in the supernatural verse and I knew I wanted to do a Doris story, but I was out of the fandom. I wrote this one back in November of 2018 and was polishing it off but I am so proud that I got it finished and managed to write 25k in a fandom I just wasn’t in anymore

5. cheating and putting my current WIP: no regrets if we walk this new road - s1 RNM rewrite with Michael/Alex, Max/Liz, Kyle/Isobel. Remember when I wanted someone else to write a role swap where Max and Kyle swapped roles? Ha, joke’s on me. This isn’t necessarily the ONLY s1 rewrite I have (there’s another I have where Noah isn’t the antagonist and there’s another regular who is an alien committing the murders and anyway, that’s a whole other story I won’t write). but I’m proud of this because it’s very pod squad balances in a way No Love wasn’t and I loved giving Michael, Max, and Isobel all happy endings

Tagging @aewriting @queersirius @myrmidryad @hazel-athena @unbreakablejemmasimmons @lire-casander @manesalex @insidious-intent and anyone else who wants to do this

[enbies-and-felonies]

What was the first fandom you ever got invested in?

The first one I was really invested in was probably..... The Amazing Tales of Max and Liz (aka, the Epic Order of the Seven), which was a Christian book series focusing on a couple of immortal animals.

It was actually super good and I think I hyperfixated on that for awhile.

[bestillmyslashyheart]

part 5, following @partsofthesamecosmicbeing‘s part 4 

--

“I used to think you were unknowable, totally unpredictable.”

Alex tensed as Kyle’s voice echoed in the bunker. He turned in his chair slowly to find Kyle standing on the landing on the other side of the room, a bag clutched in his hand and an inscrutable look on his face.

“Okay?” Alex asked when he didn’t continue.

Kyle huffed and made his way down the stairs. “I was going out to the cabin when I thought maybe I should check here first. E voila. Here you are. Working instead of enjoying your honeymoon.”

Alex turned back around. “I may have found another facility. If I’m right then there are people there who need help and I don’t want to leave them there any longer than I have to.” He ignored the honeymoon comment.

The chair next to him squeaked as Kyle pulled it out. A loud thump echoed as he dropped the bag on the table and Alex side eyed him.

“Can I help you with something?”

“That was a real dick move, Alex,” Kyle told him quietly. “I mean-” he stopped and shook his head.

Alex swallowed and clenched his jaw. “I made a decision for me, not for any one else. I know I could have handled it better, done things differently, but I didn’t want to.”

Kyle huffed a laugh and put his face in his hands, his elbows resting on his knees as he leaned forwards. “Everyone’s pissed. At both of you.”

“Good for them.”

“Alex,” Kyle admonished. “You really hurt her.”

Alex stilled, his fingers hovering over the keyboard. “I know. I wish I hadn’t because I know how it feels but I guess I was taking a page out of her book. I just wanted to be selfish for once and damn the consequences. Just once in my fucking life I wanted to take something for me.”

There was a rustling as Kyle pulled a bottle of whiskey out of his bag. He waved it in the air until Alex turned to look at him. “Look, I already told you I think you pulled a dick move and you really hurt a friend of mine. But you’re my friend too and I’m not so pissed that I’m going to forget that.”

Alex nodded at him in thanks, unable to get the words out. 

Kyle nodded back. “So...drink?” 

“I’m not much of a whiskey drinker,” Alex admitted apologetically.

Kyle pursed his lips and nodded before rummaging through his bag again. This time he pulled out a bottle of champagne.

Alex raised an eyebrow in question.

“You just got married, right? That’s worth a toast.” He smiled at Alex until Alex smiled back. “Just need a couple of glasses.”

Alex rolled his eyes but got up to get something to drink out of. The bunker was well stocked but almost all of his liquids were prepackaged and so there weren’t a whole lot of glasses available. Eventually, he scrounged up an old package of styrofoam cups and tore the plastic open.

“Not the fanciest things in the world,” he commented idly as he rejoined Kyle.

Kyle laughed but didn’t say anything as he poured them each a glass. Alex held his up for a toast but Kyle kept his close to his chest.

“Kyle...”

“Are you happy?” Kyle asked. “I mean, is this something you really want right now? I know you love him, but marriage? Two days ago he was engaged to someone else and you two hadn’t spoken in a year and a half.” Kyle’s brow was furrowed in worry.

Alex put his cup back down and rubbed at his eye. “It’s not that simple.”

“It’s not simple if you’re happy to be married? That should be the simplest thing about this.”

Alex huffed, a smile playing at his lips. “Yes, I’m happy.” He held up his left hand and stared at the ring. “It’s fucking amazing how happy just seeing this makes me. Seeing it and knowing that Michael’s got the other one.” He twirled his cup. “Last time we talked about Michael I told you I hadn’t spoken to him since the day after Max died, after he and Maria started their relationship or whatever.”

“Yeah...” Kyle agreed. “You avoided both of them like the plague.”

Alex nodded. “I did. But Michael wasn’t so good at avoiding me. Not really. He- we-” He shook his head. “You know how there are some nights when you can’t sleep and you just have the urge to do something really stupid because there’s a time of night that doesn’t feel real? Like it’s four am and there are no consequences?”

Kyle leaned back in his chair, an exasperated look on his face but he waved Alex on.

“There were a lot of four am phone calls,’ Alex admitted. “More than a few four am visits too.”

“Jesus Alex,” Kyle let out softly. “So when Maria accused Michael of being with you the whole time...”

“No,” Alex denied. “Nothing ever happened. Sometimes we didn’t even talk. We just- sat there. It’s absurd how much a silent phone call can soothe your soul when it’s hurting.”

“Alex,” Kyle whispered. “Why didn’t you ever say anything?”

Alex scoffed. “About what? How much it hurt for my best friend to date the love of my life? How much it broke me?” He shook his head and stared into his cup as he swirled the champagne. “Who would I tell? No one cared.”

“I cared.”

“Yeah,” Alex agreed, his tone taking on a biting edge. “You cared enough to tell me that I was better off without him and that I needed to move on. Which I appreciated, I did. But there’s no moving on. I could try with someone else, maybe even be happy with him, but no one would ever compare to Michael. No one could ever compare. Sometimes I wish that wasn’t true but I spent ten years trying to move on and find someone else and nothing and no one ever even came close. Then I ended up back here and I was finally, finally ready to stop running. I was ready to try. And then he kissed Maria.”

He put his cup down and reached for the whiskey, quickly opening the bottle and taking a swig. “I’ve been shot, I’ve been blown up, I’ve lost a fucking limb, Kyle, but nothing has ever hurt me as bad as hearing them tell me they were dating. And part of that was Michael but honestly, I’d pushed him away enough times that I understood him wanting to try and move on. But Maria? She was my best friend, she was the only person I ever told about what Michael meant to me, long before she knew it was Michael. But then she knew. She knew and she swore to me that there was nothing between them. That there would never be anything between them. So her telling me she was dating him and that she really needed me to be supportive and to respect their decision? That was what killed me.” He took another deep swig until Kyle pulled the bottle from his lips.

“I’m sorry,” Kyle told him. “I’m sorry I didn’t ask enough question or pay enough attention to realize how bad you were hurting. And I’m sorry that you had to go through that.” He pushed Alex’s cup towards him. “But I didn’t come here to make you cry, I came to celebrate.” He lifted his own cup with a smile. Alex stared at him for a beat before shaking his head and lifting his own cup, tapping them together lightly.

“To you and Michael!” Kyle announced. “May you have a long and happy marriage.”

Alex let out a light laugh. “To me and Michael!” He echoed before they both took sips. 

Kyle shifted in his seat. “Now, tell me all about you and Michael. Who proposed? How did it go? What exactly possessed you two to get married immediately? Like was there a discussion? Or were you two crazy just like fuck it it’s been long enough let’s go?”

Alex laughed and shook his head. Part of him was still reeling from spilling his guts about Maria a moment ago and the sudden tonal shift was giving him whiplash. But a larger part of him was just happy not to have lost his friend and to be able to talk about his relationship, his marriage, with someone who wouldn’t hate him for it.

“First of all,” he started off as he got comfortable in his chair. “I need you to tell me what the fuck happened yesterday? Why did you, why did all of you break into my house?!”

Kyle looked a bit sheepish as he ducked his head. “We couldn’t find Guerin. He just tore out of the Pony and disappeared. He even left his phone behind and well, people were getting worried.” Alex could imagine. He knew the six of them had become a very tight knit group over the last eighteen months, a group he was not a part of by choice, and Michael’s seemingly irrational behavior and sudden departure would be cause for concern. “I stopped by to ask if you’d seen him and when you didn’t answer the door I used my key to get in. Your car was in the driveway and I was worried something might be wrong. And then, well, I saw his hat on the table so I called Liz and told her so that she could stop worrying and the next thing I know they’re all showing up at your front door. It was impossible to get them to leave but I didn’t think it would be that big of a deal. I certainly wasn’t expecting him to carry you across the threshold announcing that your his husband.” His voice was teasing by the end but Alex knew he felt bad for his part in how it went down.

“Your turn,” Kyle added.

Alex groaned but quickly launched into his tale.

---

Alex cursed as he pulled up next to the cabin and Maria stood up from her perch on the steps. He glanced around for Michael’s car since the man had said he would meet Alex here an hour ago but the only other vehicle in sight was Maria’s.

“Why?” Maria asked as he got out of the car. 

“Maria,” he sighed. “What are you doing here?”

“I want some fucking answers!” She yelled at him, tears welling up in her eyes.

Alex fiddled with his keys as a movement in the window caught his eye. He glanced over to see Michael’s worried face peeking out of the window next to the door, his hair dripping wet from what Alex presumed was a recent shower. Alex saw him reach for the door and shook his head as subtly as he could. He didn’t need or want Michael to save him from this conversation.

“About what?” He asked Maria.

“Why couldn’t you let me be? Why couldn’t let us be happy?” She asked.

“I didn’t do anything, Maria,” Alex told her. “Since the very beginning I went out of my way to give you both space, to not be a part of your relationship.”

“Do you honestly expect me to believe that after almost two years of no contact he leaves me and marries you within 24 hours?” Maria scoffed. “Bullshit.”

Alex tamped down on his anger. She had a right to be hurt, he told himself. “I said I gave you both space and that I wasn’t a part of your relationship. I never said we haven’t had contact.”

“So you’ve been with him? This whole time?”

“Jes-” Alex cut himself off. “No. We’ve talked on the phone a few times, that’s all. mostly about my work. Sometimes about other things, yes, but nothing like what you’re imagining.”

“And how do you know what I’m imagining?”

“You’ve made it pretty clear what you think happened.” Alex kept his voice firm.

Maria wiped at the tears on her cheek. “Fine, so I’m wrong. Why don’t you tell me what happened then?”

“We talked. I told him I couldn’t take it anymore, that having to be here and bear witness to your relationship was killing me and that I needed him to leave me completely alone from now on. That was a couple of weeks ago. And then the night before last he showed up at my door and said he’d made his choice. So I made mine.”

Maria laughed harshly. “Just like that? After a decade of pushing him away, he just chooses you?”

“Yeah,” Alex told her softly. “Just like that.”

“Fuck you.” Her voice was biting. “We were happy.”

“I know. I never asked him for anything, Maria. All I did was tell him that your fiance had no part in my life and I didn’t want to see him. I was trying to let him go.”

“It’s been almost two years, Alex! Why didn’t you let him go then?”

Alex scoffed. “I couldn’t move on when I had ten years to do it. Did you really think another one or two would do the trick? He’s it for me, Maria. He has been since we were 17. He’s my family. He’s my home.”

Maria looked away.

“You should go, Maria. Whatever answers you’re hoping to hear, you won’t find them.” Alex gave her a wide berth and climbed the stairs slowly. 

“Do you know how much I hate you right now?” Maria asked him lowly.

Alex sighed. “Probably half as much as I hated you when you told me you were dating him.”

Maria whirled on him. “I asked for your support! I didn’t want to lose you Alex.”

Alex laughed, his voice a cold, harsh thing. “Right yeah, you asked me to support you as you fucked me over harder than anyone else ever had. You knew what he meant to me, Maria. I know you said you couldn’t control your feelings for him and that it was cruel of me to ask you to but you could’ve controlled your actions. What you did about your feelings, that was on you.”

“Like this is on you.”

“Yes, but the difference here is I’m not screwing over my best friend for a convenient fuck.”

Maria shook her head, her mouth opening and closing but nothing coming out.

“Go home, Maria,” he told her gently. “Call Liz. Drink a lot of alcohol and cry it out while she rubs your back or whatever. You still have your friends.”

“Is that a threat?” She asked, bewildered.

He shook his head. “No, it’s a reminder. He and I are in the wrong here and everybody hates us. Everyone is on your side, Maria. When it was you and him fucking me over?” He laughed and shook his head. “Well then I had everyone telling me to get over it and be happy for you two. I lost the love of my life, my best friend, and every single person that I thought gave a shit about me in this town, all in one fell swoop. And then you all had the audacity to be angry with me for not getting over myself in a timely manner.”

“Go home, Maria. And don’t come back. There’s nothing for you here.” He turned and went into the house without waiting for her to reply. 

Alex closed the door behind him and pressed his back against it, his eyes closing as he listened carefully to Maria’s movement. There was a long pause and then the crunch of gravel followed by the car door opening and closing. Another long pause before the engine turned over before he heard the blessed sounds of her driving away.

He sagged in relief before opening his eyes. Michael stood in front of him, a pained expression on his face.

“Alex, I am so so-”

Alex shook his head and cut him off. “No. No more talking. I have had enough painful conversations today and I do not need one with you too.”

Michael looked like he wanted to continue anyway but he nodded. “What do you need?”

“I just need you.’

Michael nodded and pulled Alex into his arms, Alex’s face tucking into his neck as he sank into Michael’s embrace. “I can do that.”

[dreamsofalifea]

((150 followers Follow Forever!!!))

Aka, I have NO IDEA how y'all put up with me. I want to give some cred to the people who have been there for me. I love you guys so much. If I don't tag all of your blogs, please forgive me.

@siximpossiblethoughts / @princesxcourt / @swcrdandshield / @pennedbymax Max is one of the kindest, funniest, most creative and lively roleplayers I know. He knows how to capture a wide spectrum of emotion and can make you laugh, cry, and wanna yell in a single reply.

@unhollowedsouls / @thoseofonen My friendship with Mark is the one good thing that came out of the worst year of my life, someone I'm so blessed to know. If you like fantasy, in depth characterization, and real passion behind their work, this is a person for you.

@the-toon-magistrate is??? Honestly a kindred spirit and someone I love getting to talk to, ic and ooc. One of the most refreshing people you will ever meet, and someone who's sharp and doesn't sugarcoat things.

@itsplanty one of my closest friends since I was a dumb teen, he's been with me through my worst times. Genuine, wise, funny, kind, and somebody I felt an immediate connection with. This is a one of a kind person.

@foxedthecards / @thebookofnoodle / @behaveyourselfelliott A fun and sweet person who's full of life and a joy to be around! Someone who would brighten up the darkest day, and who has a fantastic sense of humor.

@scientificentropy / @bluehaired-frontman MY FRIEND!!! Been with me since I first started out this blog, and has helped me grow and develop my muse. I dunno how they've put up with my crazy ideas, but thank you for doing so.

@ambcrheart / @biquinhoduck Bug is...I cannot begin to describe the greatness that is Bug??? You'll never meet a more dedicated player, or a more interesting person to talk to. The Queen of Angst and writer of Shy's adopted nephew.

@doyouliketosamba / @humming-nerd / @ginghamandyarn Blue is the FREAKING BOMB okay??? I can't put into words how much I love our talks, in character interactions, and our muses have such fantastic chemistry.

@adam--bomb A very interesting character whose writer is an incredibly fun, sweet person. I can't wait to write more with you!

@unjuste / @facetandcut / @eycwitnessed Bee is the funniest, most clever person you could hope to rp with. She has such deep insight into her characters and can see things from every angle, and connects dots nobody else could even think of.

@bluehaired-tales I've followed her since I basically started role-playing. Mun is so patient, funny, and somebody I look up to as a role model.

@cave-of-the-owl-witch Liz is one of my oldest and truest friends and I thank God every day that I know them.

@frymans / @amongpeace / @junkgun / @bostonbashin Shelby is goddamn amazing, and while we don't know each other quite well, I look forward to writing with her soon!

@poludaktulos a fantastic writer and an awesome friend who I love!

@theboyfrommaine is a new friend who I really enjoy talking to. Calvin is so easy to talk to, and a joy to know.

@primedspecimen another new friend, but someone I really trust and look up to. One of the kindest people you could ever meet.

@pixtolsandqueens Shy's adopted mom, and an incredibly creative mind who makes things I couldn't even dream of

@deity-of-calamity Honestly?? A playful, kind, welcoming person you should follow. A delightful friend.

@extrahoo Legit one of the coolest people I've met on Tumblr. Introduced me to the Golden Girls and is just a very strong person who puts so much love into their characterization.

@tenthousandyeeeears Y'all should follow Medic because he plays the best Genie ever, and is so fun to talk to.

Even if you're not on my list, I love you guys so much and I can't believe I'm this lucky.

[traincat]

Correct me if I'm wrong, but was not Flash having an abusive father a retcon that happened many years later after his debut? I remember you ask about whatever Flash being a bully was a retcon too, so I wonder if its the same case for his father. Perhaps is the reason why MCU decided to avoid any hint that Flash' father might be abusive.

Okay, this is a little messy, but from my point of view the answer is yes and no, or rather, it’s kind of half a retcon, if that. It’s a retcon that, with a little connecting the dots, we can make not a retcon. A retcon, by technical definition, is a piece of canon that retroactively rewrites the continuity that came before it. “The Alicia Masters that Johnny Storm married was a Skrull all along!” is a retcon, because before that piece of information was introduced, the Alicia Masters that Johnny Storm married was just Alicia Masters, regular human woman. A piece of information that reveals something about a character’s backstory or circumstances that just never came up before but doesn’t actually contradict anything, on the other hand, is not a retcon. 

This... falls in between those two things.

First off, Harrison Thompson is in a total of 13 comic issues altogether. That’s really not a lot -- Flash himself is in 574 comics, according to the Marvel Wiki. Harrison Thompson’s first appearance is in the B story of Amazing Spider-Man #372, titled Punch... Counter-Punch, where Peter and Flash years later revisit their boxing max from Amazing Spider-Man #8, albeit in a much friendlier manner. Now, note that this is several hundred issues after Flash’s introduction to the pages of Spider-Man, during which his father has never been mentioned before in either positive or negative light. The boxing match is just window dressing for the real point of the story, though, which involves Flash encouraging Peter to engage with his parents, Richard and Mary Parker, who had at that point in canon seemingly returned from the dead/the gulag. (“Richard and Mary” were actually robots, but that part doesn’t matter here. I love that I get to write that sentence.) Flash then launches into a recollection of his own father, who he describes as serious, intelligent, uninterested in athletics, and disapproving of Flash’s own interests in sports and his average grades. When Peter asks if Flash made up with his own father, Flash says he died:

Now, we know this is not true -- Harrison Thompson appears in Untold Tales of Spider-Man #19, published in 1997, a good four years after Amazing Spider-Man #372. Untold Tales of Spider-Man is a series from the ‘90s that bulked out the content of Peter’s high school years, considering that he’s only in high school in the original Amazing Spider-Man run for a grand total of 28 issues, and focused on Peter, Betty Brant, and Peter’s high school classmates. It’s a series I mostly find boring, I’ll be entirely honest, although I like some of the Flash, Liz, and Betty content. Untold Tales of Spider-Man #19 is technically the first time Harrison Thompson actually physically appears in a Spider-Man scene, being present in the book instead of in another character’s recollection. 

Harrison Thompson here has been reinvented as a Forest Hills police officer who, in this issue at least, is portrayed as a generally friendly fellow. Literally two months after this was published, Spectacular Spider-Man #-1 was published. Written by J.M. “stories about child abuse” DeMatteis, it begged the following: “how can we add more childhood trauma to the Spider-Man cast?” and “fuck the police.”

This comic, which I believe is the third ever appearance of Harrison Thompson within Marvel comics although I might be missing another Untold Spider-Man bit, keeps Harrison Thompson as a cop, but whereas in Untold Spider-Man he seemed an okay enough guy, Spectacular Spider-Man #-1′s depiction of him is an abusive drunk who emotionally terrorizes his family and beats his son. 

So we’ve got a weird little evolution here from intellectual snob who in his son’s eyes looked down on him for not sharing his more cerebral interests -> seemingly genial neighborhood cop -> violently abusive father. Now the second two don’t actually rule each other out: Harrison Thompson could certainly have put on a good face for the community while abusing his family at home. This is, after all, not uncommon behavior for abusers, who can often keep up a very charming act within their larger communities. (J.M. DeMatteis writes a lot of abusive father stories, and he does it very well.) So it’s really only the first story that’s the problem, continuity-wise. 

The Marvel wiki lists Harrison’s appearance in Amazing Spider-Man #372 as a “false recollection”, which is, I think, an interesting way of putting it. Now I said this was in my opinion half a retcon at best, and I consider it that because of something I noted above: Harrison Thompson never actually physically appears in this issue. Flash talks about him, but the problem with that is a very simple characterization rule: characters lie. Almost every character in a large body of canon, at some point or another, for whatever reason, is going to lie. “False recollection” can mean a lot of things, and “lie to your best friend to encourage him to get close again with his own parents” and “say your dad is dead because you kind of wish he was” are not outside the realm of possibility. I think this would be a very different case if Harrison Thompson had physically appeared as Flash describes him initially on the page, or if the issue had even contained a proper flashback scene instead of Flash speaking over some vague images. But that’s not the case, and when all you have is one character’s words there’s always the chance that their recollections are either untrue or unreliable.

Now, I can make this messier. In Amazing Spider-Man #372, Flash tells Peter his dad died before Flash ever met Peter. This is complicated two ways: first, as established later by Untold Spider-Man #19, Peter had met Flash’s dad, so he would’ve known in ASM #372 that Flash’s dad couldn’t possibly have died before Peter and Flash ever met. (Flash would also have had to be very young, younger than he’s depicted even in ASM #372, for his dad to have died before he and Peter met.) Worse yet, in Webspinners #9, which also takes place when Peter and Flash are still in high school, Peter as Spider-Man witnesses, without Flash’s knowledge, an incident where Flash is being punished and verbally abused by his father. (It’s also implied he witnesses Harrison hitting Flash via sound effect, but that’s not directly on panel.)

Now, I never know what to feel about this Webspinners story, canonicity-wise. For one, I think it’s not the best characterization for Spider-Man to see anyone he knows, whether or not he especially likes them, being abused and to do nothing to halt that abuse, although that would be a much more complicated story that a three-parter about Peter accidentally ending up with three prom dates doesn’t really have room to cover. For another, it gives Peter a very intimate look at Flash’s personal life that would surely recontextualize some things for him, but of course none of that is reflected in the college years because those stories weren’t written with this incident in mind. Peter finding out about Flash’s abusive home life in high school is, for me, the bit that most shoddily fits in here, though we do know that by the time they’re in their late 20s Peter is aware of things:

(Venom (2011) #5)

So if we’re putting it all together, with the assumption that, in order to keep all of the canon here cohesive (a very difficult thing to do with any long-running superhero comic), we’d have to view the ASM #372 story under the light that not only was Flash lying, but he was lying badly, and Peter knew he was lying, and they were just not talking about it. It’s messy, sure, and it’s not perfect, but “one character is lying for an agenda, other character knows and doesn’t confront him over it” isn’t out of the realm of possibility, if I wanted to make that argument.

Ultimately, for me, here’s the thing: Harrison Thompson is present in 13 issues. That’s is such an incredibly small part of a huge body of canon, but 11 of those issues have huge consequences for Flash Thompson. The two issues before DeMatteis introduced Harrison Thompson as a violently abusive man are a recollection that could easily be a lie -- a shoddy one, admittedly, but people tell shoddy lies all the time, so why shouldn’t fictional characters -- and an issue that, while it does not portray him as an abusive father, it doesn’t contradict it, either. Everything after that is relatively consistent in depicting Flash’s father as abusive throughout his childhood. You could consider Spectacular Spider-Man #-1 and subsequent stories are a retcon of Amazing Spider-Man #372, but you could also noodle your way around into making it work within the body of canon as I have done above. It’s really up to how the individual reader here wants to look at it. And even if someone does choose to view it as a retcon, it’s not a big one; it changes almost nothing about the canon that existed beforehand where Flash Thompson isn’t concerned, and there’s nothing in his story up until that point that would explicitly rule out him being an abused child. I will say, between the two stories, “my dad and I never got along because he was too nerdy to understand my athletic passions” is pretty sorry competition for the latter backstory that was created for Flash, which does a lot to inform his past actions as a character, from his high school bully status to his military enlistment which, as the sliding timescale moves the decade the Spidey Fivesome were in college together forward, we can no longer attribute to the draft. It also offers him something in common with many of the other major members of Peter’s supporting cast: like Flash, Mary Jane and Harry were also abused by their fathers. (Who in Marvel comics wasn’t? Peter. Peter Parker was not.) 

All that aside, I doubt that when Spider-Man: Homecoming’s creative team was conceiving their version of Flash Thompson that they chose to omit any mention of his abusive father in homage to Amazing Spider-Man #372′s B story, especially after they reimagined Flash as a nerd himself. “If he were smarter, his father wouldn’t beat him” would become a, uh, troubling implication if anyone involved in the movie were to make that claim. Which they won’t, because I would bet a lot of money that they didn’t think about it that much. This is the film that cut any mention of Uncle Ben’s death because it would be a “downer” -- they weren’t going to introduce an abusive homelife for one of Peter’s classmates. And that’s not even my issue, as much as I appreciate The Amazing Spider-Man (2012)’s oblique reference in the hallway scene where Flash says “it feels better, right?” after Peter slams him against the lockers. Addressing Flash Thompson’s childhood isn’t something that’s going to make or break a Spider-Man adaptation for me, although ideally it’s something I would like to see handled with care and sympathy. My issue is that you have a character who, in the source material, has consistently been depicted as the victim of childhood abuse from 1997 onwards, and instead chose to make that character an affluent nerd and the butt of a joke that, if it had happened to the original Flash Thompson in high school, surely would have had serious consequences for him when Peter steals and wrecks his car. I just found it an uncomfortable, knowing Flash’s comics backstory. (And as someone who’s had their car stolen, I’m not exactly sure how grand theft auto is supposed to be funny.) I’m sure the movie could’ve shoved more sports car time in there some other way. 

[mrneighbourlove]

Red Typhoon: Ch 4. Finding Gold for Body and Soul

The ship was a marvel on the waves, skyrocketing and breaking modern records. Magic was on the side of the crusaders. It took a bit for the crew to get adjusted to the ships speed, but they found that as long as they didn't reach outside of the deck over the water, they didn't feel the speed. Everyone had a chance to catch up on lost time.

"And then, when me wife was screaming profanities at me during labor, I made the mistake of a-telling her that it wasn't my fault, we both did the deed." Rat was telling the amusing story about Trygve's birth. "And then she punched me in the balls."

"BUWAHAHAHA!"

The entire crew was laughing at Rat's expense.

"You think dat's bad? Me wife threatened ta chop off me balls!" Juju snickered.

"Me wife kicked me out of bed for a month!" Mojo chuckled.

"Missy Orana chucked Corsaire overboard when Nakeso was being born." Bomba held his sides from laughing. "He said, 'Can you quit pacing, I'm trying to get some sleep!'. Wrong thing to say."

"Dad, oh my god, you're so embarrassing." Revy snickered next to him, giving him a light punch in the shoulder.

Liz sat contently next to Halvar, finding comfort in leaning against his frame. Scarlet gave a chuckle at all the men's stories. Her own pregnancy was hell to get through. She wanted to tear the doctor in half from her underhanded comments that all she had to do was 'push' and that is was 'easy'.

"I's learned my lesson."

"Me too."

"Women are scary creatures."

"I's not sure what scares me more. Me lady on her monthly or the kraken!"

"HAHAHAHA!"

"I still can't believe cap'n ever entertained the idea of kids." Bomba took a sip of his drink. "He doesn't even like kids!"

"I tolerated you, thank you very much, and I like kids fine, I don't like brats." Corsaire told him dryly. "You were a brat and a troublemaker."

"I's not that bad!"

"You almost capsized me ship playing with that black powder numerous times."

"Almost is the key word in that sentence."

"Not to mention, you's gotten us chased out of ports before due to your lovely pickpocket talent."

"Aw, thanks cap'n!"

"That's not a compliment!"

"Well, you were a family. So that has to count for something, knowing you could always pull each other out of trouble, through thick or-" Scarlet was happy for a moment, nostalgia hitting her, before sadness slapped the Gerudo back down to reality, and she stopped talking. "You have no regrets. Be happy with that."

"Heh, we's always tried to be there for each other. Didn't have no one else." Mojo told Scarlet. "Corsaire rescued me and me brother. I's albino and dat's bad luck where I's from."

"We's stowed away on his ship and he let us stay." Juju added onto his brother's words. "We's safe with him."

"T-T-Took us out of th-the circus." Pockets gestured to himself then Acrobat. "N-Never saw me... saw me as a f-freak."

"Helped me recover when me legs were both broke beyond repair." Acrobat patted his thighs. "Helped me learn to walk a little again."

"Took me away from the gladiator rings." Rat clasped his hands together. "Reunited me with Renegade after so long of thinking me old friend was dead."

"Saved me from the streets and... and Seer from the brothel." Bomba's voice fell a little. "... Seer loved to cook for us. Never once asked for anything but ingredients for the food. I miss his calm chowder."

"Fish tacos."

"Vegetable medley."

"Chili soup."

"Roasted flounder."

"Braised pork."

"... yeah... he always fixed us food. Knew what it was like to be hungry. Didn't want us to ever feel that way." Bomba sighed. "Despite what those horrid people did ta him, he still has a golden heart."

With that, a thick cloud of sadness swept through. Everyone missed Seer dearly. Halvar could have sworn he was feeling Liz heat up against him, when Lex decided to lighten the mood. "And he is the BEST at story telling! I love the tale how he'd say that Captain Corsaire was a legend of the sea for taking down two Krakens, and it would be a riot if Uncle had to go up against a third. Think we can fight a big squidy Uncle?"

"Heh, Seer was there when we encounter the krakens. He was scared out of his wits too, kept telling me that they were very, very angry." Corsaire smiled a little at the mention of the old tale. "Makes sense now that he could sort of understand them, him being a Direnor and all."

"We all made it a-out unscathed, thanks to him and Missy Orana." Rat pulled Revy a little closer, holding her closer. "Us, krakens, and the ship."

"Liz would tell me the stories that Seer told her when he was on the ship with Corsaire." Halvar finally spoke, resting his head on top of Liz's. "I really enjoyed the one where Rat basically threw Corsaire onto the balcony so he could speak to Orana again."

"Uncle Corsaire isn't really good with the ladies." Liz gave a chuckle. She was grateful to how quick Lex was to cool her off.

"Hey I was just fine with the ladies." Corsaire crossed his arms. "Then Orana just... happened to catch me."

"More like you chased her."

"I did not!"

"Did too, lovesick dog."

"Remember when he was depressed after she went home to Hyrule?"

"Sulked for days in his cabin."

"I did not sulk!"

"HAHAHAHA!"

"You sound like a sulker Uncle Corsaire." Lex giggled.  

"Look! He's doing it right now Dad!" Revy pointed, laughing at her Uncle's embarrassment.

"Ah, shut it yous." Corsaire huffed. "All of yous need to get some rest anyway."

"Agreed. According to the charts, we should arrive at our destination by tomorrow afternoon." Bakura spoke up, having kept his eye on the ship while the group had their fun. He felt like more of an outcast than Scarlet. This was, in some ways, all his fault that Adda did what she did.

"You need to eat before you sleep," Corsaire told Bakura as he stood from his barrel seat. "You didn't even touch dinner. Rat's cooking isn't that bad. Need your strength, so eat then go rest."

"Cap'n's orders, Bakie." Rat gave Revy a gentle shake. "Hey now, me love, don't doze off on me just yet. Let's get you to bed."

"Huh? I'm not sleepy."

"Oh yes you are. Listen to your father young lady."

"What-*yawn*-ever mom." Revy was indeed sleepy.

Bakura continued looking at the stars. "I'll eat in a minute or two. You all have a good nights sleep."

"Taking first watch? Very well." Corsaire stretched lightly and then said. "Come get me for second watch. Men, off to bed."

"Aye, aye, cap'n."

"That means you two, girls." Rat told Liz and Lex. "Halvar, you's sleeping with the men."

"Whu? I mean, of course I am!" The prince blushed.

Scarlet gave a light frown. "Rat. Liz has a Voe, I think they have the right to stay in the same bed."

Liz looked over her shoulder to Halvar, a curiosity forming. How long had they been a relationship for now? Cuddles in the day on a couch were one thing, but what of cuddling at night? More soft spoken than she meant to, she turned to the Prince "Halvar.... would you like to share a bed. With me?"

"No hankie pankie on me ship!" Corsaire yelled from beneath, earning a few snickers from the men, knowing the captain was a protective uncle as well.

"There's a difference between sharing a bed for sleep and sharing a bed for... that." Rat was still a little off put by the sex conversation with the twins and his own daughter. It was always a touchy subject for him, especially with him having to work in the pleasure houses as well when his old master made him for extra cash. "Besides, Liz doesn't need to go and get pregnant right before a battle. Tis dangerous."

"We are NOT going to have sex!" Liz shouted at the men, appalled that was the first place they'd jump to. Lex snickered, giving her sister a tap. "Why not? Heard a rumour that being a virgin is never a good thing going into battle. Trust me, you'll both love it~"

Revy quickly pulled Lex away before Liz lost it. "I will THROW you over the ship so help me god Lex!"  Her max embarrassment couldn't be reached any higher. Liz turned to Halvar, sighing. "I'll just go to bed if you aren't comfortable."

"Pin me down and lick my dick!" Bomba's voice rang out from beneath the deck. "Fuck me like a big, bad bitch! We won't stop til you say when! Next time won't you bring a friend~~~~!"

"BOMBA SHUT UP!!!" The entire crew yelled at him.

"All you's don't appreciate my singing talents."

"More like wailing talents."

Halvar's face was bright red by this time, but he finally found a way to speak.

"I um... I'll do what you want, Liz. You're my lady, and I want you comfortable."

"That's not what I asked..." Liz sighed. If Halvar didn't tell her that HE was comfortable first and foremost, than she wouldn't force him. "I don't want to demand anything of anyone. I'm not my mother..."

Liz walked to below deck. Glaring at her Uncle with a deep growl, Bomba received a hard punch in the stomach for embarrassing her, and she slammed the door to her bed.

Lex patted Halvar on the back. "Pussy move dude. You didn't answer her question if you yourself wanted to join her."

"It's customary for the females to initiate... that part of the courtship." Halvar told Lex with a frown. "I'll go talk to her."

"I don't know if she's in the mood for talking right now. Maybe in the morning?"

"I... I guess..." Halvar said good night to everyone else and stopped at the cabin where Liz was staying. With a sigh, he told Liz through the door. "I'm... I'm sorry if I upset you. I think it's just hard for me to get the normal Uskarian customs out of my head, even though I know you're not required to follow those. Please don't doubt my love for you, ever. You're amazing and so sweet and... I feel lucky that you look at me the way you do. Sweet dreams, Elizabeth."

Liz heard his words and felt them sting. She hated herself now for not being more forward with Halvar, and in her self-pity, bit into her pillow so no one could hear her cry.

Scarlet was making her way to bed when she saw Bomba recovering from his gut punch. "She hit you really good."

"Aye, tis nothing I can't handle." Bomba shrugged and held up his hands, missing a couple of fingers. "Dis here hurt a lot worse. I was being stupid with the black powder and it came back to bite me good."

"Well you were being more stupid here. Do none of you have daughters? You didn't think your words and laughter didn't have an effect on her?"

"I's has no kids." Bomba shook his head. "Cap'n, Rat, Mojo, Juju, and Seer has kids. Acrobat and his man thinking 'bout adopting. Pockets doesn't want any kids; too scared of them being born like him with four arms. Doesn't want the kids to feel like he used to; like a freak."

"Well you all guaking about what she does in bed was insulting." Scarlet gave him a jab, and her voice was loud enough for any of the other men to hear. "At least Bakura was wise enough to know when to keep his peace. I bet even Seer wouldn't judge."

"Hey, she's our little girl and we want her to be treated right, dat's all." Bomba jabbed Scarlet back. "We know Halvar is a good laddie, yet we don't want Liz put in a bind either. Wind up pregnant when we's going to war with Adda is not a good thing. Dat, or worse, Halvar gets her pregnant and something happens to 'em. We's seen it before and don't wish it on her."

"She's not stupid enough to get pregnant. You insulted her core. She wanted to have a moment with her Voe, and all you idiots ruined it for her. She's strong, but she's also still a girl." Scarlet jabbed him back, harder this time.

"I'm not saying she's stupid, I'm saying it could happen!" Bomba poked her harder than before. "You's and Adda were pregnant during fighting and something coulda happened then! We's would have never had these sweetlings with us if something woulda happened to ya!" The first mate was not backing down from this argument. "If she wants a moment with her man, then dat's something they's both gotta agree on. Dey's from different cultures, and Halvar's trying to respect her and everyone else in her family too." He huffed and crossed his arms. "Liz wasn't raised Gerudo, she was raised as a Uskarian. If you's gots a problem with dat, take it up with Seer. He did right by those girls."

"I DID MY FUCKING BEST FOR MY DAUGHTER!" Scarlet picked Bomba up, pinning him to the wall. "I made sure to keep her away from the fighting! Even though it broke my heart and Rat's! And for all the shit my sister in arms has done, the smartest thing she ever did was give Seer those twins! So if I got a problem its with anyone, it’s you asshole!" She dropped Bomba and turned, the stress of the mission having boiled over now. "Fuck... I... I'm sorry. God damn it..."

Bomba yelped when Scarlet pinned him against the wall with a loud bang. She had a good foot in height on him, and was certainly the stronger of the two. However, Bomba was one to never give up, and always found a way to get the upper hand in the end... in most fights. When Scarlet dropped him, he fell onto his ass with a thud and rubbed his throat.

"Hmph." Bomba frowned at Scarlet. "You's ever stop to think dat maybe you doing something 'good' for someone else is 'bad' for you?"

Scarlet, turned to him, and Bomba knew he made a mistake. "What. Else. Was I. Suppose to DO?! HUH Bomba?! I loved my Captain! She was MY LIFE! She saved me, she was my closest friend! I trusted her word as the only word I needed to trust." Scarlet towered over him, picking him up and holding him tightly by the shoulders. She didn't even care that others could be listening, which they certainly were. "Tell me, would you ever have question Corsaire's word? His trust? Because when I was at my lowest, most worried for the new baby I had, I listened to Adda's. Would YOU have done differently than me?"

"Cap'n Corsaire saved us, and he's our brother... but he doesn't expect us to live our lives for him." Bomba told Scarlet, honest as could be. "Your cap'n might have saved you, but dat doesn't mean you have to live your life for her. You's your own person, lassie." He told her, honestly. "Me cap'n would never tell me to abandon me kid. He doesn't put himself first. He puts his... his family first. His friends first. Dere's a difference 'tween Corsaire and Adda." He was not sugar coating his words.

"Adda does put her family first. She gave us homes. She allowed us to choose our occupations once we become of age. She gave me the choice to leave her... us Gerudo are her only family she has. She did what she thought was best for us." Scarlet put her hands to her face and held her breath, slowly exhaling. "And that's why I'm terrified. You're all going to kill her. She won't stop. She won't. And you'll have to kill her."

"You call dumping her kids off and making you choose 'tween your baby and her a 'sister'?" Bomba actually laughed dryly at that statement. "If dat's the kind of definition of family for Gerudos, then I's really glad the girls weren't raised there. Family don't hurt family. Don't make 'em choose 'tween kids or her." The first mate then told Scarlet. "Look, lassie. I can argue with ya til me blue in the face, but what your cap'n did was wrong. End of story." He shook his head. "We's don't want to kill her if she'll just give us Seer. She don't, then it's gonna be a fight. Cap'n never let us down before; he's never lost." He sighed and then said to Scarlet. "We's used to be pirates, but we's never hurt innocents like she did, never took for our own gain. We's stole from those who stole from the others. Cap'n never liked fighting, but he's damn good it if he has to."

"You ever hear about the battle of Fan-Shen Bay?"

"I's heard of a lot of battles, lassie."

"This one was personal. When the great war happened, there was a giant power grab for riches and power. We didn't start the war. It was slowly building up, and I think you and your crew were lucky enough to miss it. Captain Adda saw an opportunity with the Wind Waker. We had the power to put a stop to heavy hitters like Onslaught and keep him grounded. But more importantly, we, a tribe of Gerudo women, had the potential to come out on top. To bring order. As we got into the war, it quickly dawned on us that our night with your crew left us pregnant. My crew, my sisters in our tribe were terrified for us. We couldn't pull out of the war. And Adda, couldn't leave the twins with Bakura. He still had that monster Set in his mind at the time. And... and we couldn't get back to our island sanctuary. It was under siege at the time." Scarlet knew it sounded like she was making excuses to him, but this was the first time she found the will to fully explain herself. "Should I have stayed with Rat? Maybe... but I had to help my sisters. I had to make sure that they lived first. So we took the girls to Rat and Seer, and I returned to the war. The Battle of Fan-Shen Bay occurred a week after I returned to my captain. In that battle our ship was torn apart by cannon fire and we crashed into the bay. Now I want you to imagine what would happen if we had little babies with us. They would have died. I saw girls that couldn't swim drown that day, or torn apart by cannon fire. And I am grateful I returned. Adda was knocked unconscious. My sisters were panicked as we were pinned down by enemy fire. So I took command. I used ever bit of magic and skill I had to protect my sisters as we rounded our forces for a retreat. If I had stayed with Rat, I'm certain my whole tribe would have been wiped out that day. So the choices I make haunt me either way. Abandoning my daughter for 13 years, or knowing if I abandoned my crew they'd all be dead. Tell me how to heal my soul from that?"

Revy was in horror from hearing that story, having listened through the crack of her door. Why did fate have to always leave people with horrible choices. Scarlet felt like crying. "I'm... I'm tired defending myself. Adda might be rotten to the core, like everyone keeps saying, but she loved us.... and I loved her too. Please understand that."

"Me thinks either way, you's just tormenting ye self." Bomba was no guru on giving advice, he said whatever popped into his head. Yet, sometimes, his blunt statements made perfect sense. "You's were stuck either way. Yet... dere's one thing me doesn't understand." He finally asked the question everyone had been thinking. "We's coulda helped hide ye. All of ye. Why didn't you just... ask for help?"

"Didn't want to drag our enemies to Hyrule. Maybe we wanted to be more than just another tribe. Or maybe we were just stupid." Scarlet's lip quivered. "I feel stupid... Like a waste of breath."

"Maybe a little bit of both." Bomba was not very good at comforting females, so he took her hand and gently patted it. "Tis okay to feel stupid. Look at me. I's the silly one of the crew, and me mouth gets me into bad situations. Me crew calls me stupid sometimes, but dey still love me. No one tis perfect. We's all human and make mistakes." He shrugged his shoulders. "Sometimes, the best thing to do is... move forward and try to put the past behind ye." The first mate gave her a small grin. "Can't make the same mistakes again if ye don't wanna."

"Thank you Bomba." Scarlet squeezed tight, and looked into his eyes, feeling the warmth of his comfort.

"Me thinks you need to do more thinking, lassie." Bomba was truthful with Scarlet. "Thinking of what ye really want. Tis ain't 'bout Adda no more, 'bout you."

"You're right... Are you the wise one out of your brothers?"

"HAHAHA!" Bomba started laughing at that question. "Aw shit, no. Seer was the wise one. Me's just the kid... well, me used to be a kid then, sneaking into his kitchen to steal a bite of food."

"Well, you show qualities of a man now." Before Bomba could make a remake, Scarlet lifted him up off the ground, and planted a deep kiss on him.

"HMPH?!?!" Bomba was not expecting a kiss, that was for sure.

Scarlet's lips were fine, and she held the kiss for more than he thought she would. Pulling away, she had a light, floaty smile. "Thank you for talking with me. I needed that."

"Uh-huh..." Bomba was a little out of breath from the kiss and partly dazed. "No... no problem, lassie. Good talk'in, and... very, very good kiss'in."

"I'm going to check on the girls. I'll see you in the morning?" Scarlet set the dazed man down back to his feet.

"Hm-hm, morning's good." Bomba tried to snap out of his stupor just for a moment. "Wishing you sweet dreams, lassie."

"Sweet dreams Bomba." Scarlet gave him a hug into her breasts, than turned with a wave goodbye and settled for the night.

"Heheheh... boobies." Bomba snickered as Scarlet exited his cabin to check on the girls.

~

The morning came, and the crew prepared. A week out of sea and they had arrived at their first destination. They quickly dropped one of the sails to cut the speed as to not draw mass attention. The island ahead had a jungle interior, with a bustling port of other pirates coming and going. Liz was hazy, regretting crying herself to sleep the night before. She barely looked Halvar in the eye, embarrassed by her actions. Everyone was getting equipped properly. Liz was wearing a modest outfit, with a trench coat to give her an air of authority. Revy wore a simple shirt and pants with light armour underneath, and Scarlet was suiting up in her Iron Knuckle suit.

Bakura looked over the sea, turning to Corsaire. "You ever been to this island before?"

"Aye, many years ago." Corsaire made sure to guide his ship into port slowly and carefully. "Rescued Mojo and Juju here. Can't say they're happy to be back."

"We's gonna be fine, cap'n." Mojo assured Corsaire. "We's grown now, not wee lads. We can take care of ourselves."

"We'll stick together, and we's be okay." Juju agreed with his brother. "We's help looking after the girls too."

"Bakie, you's going to be okay a-doing this?" Rat asked Bakura, hating to inquire, but he had to do so. "I don't want your... other half... going too crazy if we's gotta fight."

"We... we've come to an understanding. I believe that horse kick really did a number on him. But I can keep control." Bakura patted Rat's shoulders. His attention than turned to Lex. She was walking out in a very seductive fashion. Proper, yet very alluring. "Sweet heart, what are you wearing?"

"Uh, what are YOU wearing? Baggy pants? And Ms. Scarlet, don't you think you should wear normal clothing? You can magic up your armour at any time right? You need to scream less, "I'm a big bad warrior, rrrrr." You know what I mean?"

"Lex, we's here to find out information, not for ye to find a husband." Acrobat told his niece. "You look like you's trying to bait and hook a man."

"Lex, let Scarlet wear her armor if she's a-wants." Rat then turned to Revy. "Me love, you stay close to me, you hear? I's not underestimating your fighting ability, but I promised your Mama I'd keep you a-safe."

"Aye, all the ladies stay close to us, captain's orders." Corsaire told Scarlet, Lex, Liz, and Revy. "You never know what these crooks might try."

Lex rolled her eyes. "I KNOW I'm eye candy. That's my speciality. How many women have you muscle heads ever ran up to, transfixed by their beauty, and not to mention, tell them anything to get their attention. I can make people talk to help us find our target."

Scarlet nodded, impressed. "Excellent point Lex. I suppose my intimidation factor could lead to an issue. And we ALL have our strengths and weaknesses." The Gerudo woman powered down her armour, the magic making her appear back in regular clothing once more.

"Regardless, all of you ladies are staying with one of us." Corsaire ordered firmly. "Is that clear? You will travel with one of us at all times. This island has been known to kidnap females and sell them into the slave rings."

"Eh. Small advantage I can only hope for is that Adda has made Gerudo feared enough for no one to pull that shit, but don't count on it." Scarlet nodded to the three girls.

Bakura used his skills as a bounty hunter to formulate a plan. "Be careful when asking information. When we find Eltontor, we play it safe. Interrogating him will be difficult unless we get him isolated."

"So we need to set a trap for him." Rat suggested. "Get in his good graces and then get the information we need."

"If he doesn't willingly tell us, we'll make him talk." Liz spoke up, hyper focused on the mission ahead.

"No one goes alone," Corsaire told everyone. "Acrobat, Pockets, you search the fishing docks. Mojo, Juju, stay with the ship, I don't want anyone trying to get the bright idea of hurting Mojo. Rat, Revy, you go search the trading posts. Lex, Liz, you're with me, we'll search the taverns." Then he ordered. "Bomba, Scarlet, you take the markets."

Bakura checked his blades, and polished his mask. "Girls, stick to the captains orders. Halvar, you come with me. You can probably pass off as a slave boy if anyone asks any questions about you."

"Hey!" Halvar objected at that remark. "Slave boy, my ass."

"Halvar, do as he tells you." Corsaire told the young prince. "We need to get you back home to your parents safe and sound."

"... can Liz come with me?" He asked the captain. "I feel better if she's at my side. I want to protect her."

"Very well." Corsaire gestured to Halvar. "Liz?"

Liz thought about her actions last night, how she wished she could be a better girlfriend to Halvar. Maybe they could use this chance to take care of themselves. "Well, I suppose it can't hurt to look after you as well Halvar."

Bakura waved her over. "Alright. Anyone asks. I'm an Yuga bounty hunter, you're my partner, and this is a Direnor slave we acquired."

"Grr... fine." Halvar agreed to go along with the farce because this was Liz's other dad. He did not want too many tensions since he intended to marry Liz.

"Is everyone else ready?"

"Aye, cap'n."

"Let's find this guy. Seer's counting on us." Bakura finished slipping his mask down and the ship pulled into the dock.

Everyone set out, Scarlet ready to summon her armour at a moments notice. Looking around, she was hit with an air of nostalgia at all the unlawful trade occurring around her. Smiling to Bomba, she nudged him. "You miss this at all?"

"Eh, a little." Bomba looked around at all the merchandise. "Me's content to work for Hyrule now. Better money, safer, and can still be close to cap'n and me family."

"Not gonna lie. Cracking heads and getting rich with all the laughs and joy with my sisters is a feeling that I wish I could recapture sometimes."

"Not like you can't recreate that feeling with us." Bomba suggested to Scarlet. "If you're bored in Uskar, then come work on the ship with the cap'n and me. We could always use a bit of extra muscle!"

"I go where Revy goes. That's how its always been for me."

"Aye, and me admires your dedication to your wee one." Bomba nodded his head. "Though, you know, Reveka is grown now. She knows how to fight, how to take care of herself, and one day, she'll have a family of her own. She'd want you to be happy doing what you like. She wouldn't expect you to chain ye self down cause of her."

Scarlet knew Bomba was right. Borghild had told her the same so many times. "I haven't really found anyone to settle down with."

"Well, even if you haven't found a mate to settle down with, it'd be fun for you to come along with us." Bomba reminded Scarlet. "We's not pirates no more, but we still know how to party and have fun."

"I'll give it some thought..."

"All righty, then." Bomba looked around the market at the various booths. So far, he did not see no crocodile man. He did, however, see an object which caught his eye. Approaching the stand full of flowers, he paid for a single gerber daisy. Once in his hands, he waltzed back to Scarlet, stood on his tiptoes, and put it behind her ear. "There. No lady can be sad with flowers."

Scarlet looked down at him in surprise. Her shock was evidence she didn't know what to make of the action. "No one has ever given me flowers before."

"Eh? All ladies deserve some perdy flowers." Bomba stretched and then put his hands on the back of his head. "Especially a red flower like you."

Scarlet took the flower and smelled it closely. "Lavender... I love lavender."

"Lavender? Me's not too good with the names of flowers, lassie." Bomba told her. "Next time we's seeing some at a booth or what not, you show me. Learn a little from you 'bout perdy blooms." He then held up a pocket of coins he had taken from another customer with a grin. "And me learn you a little about pickpocketing."

"Well, aren't you sneaky." Scarlet threw him another bag that she snatched off a man walking back to his boat.

"The sneakiest, lassie, don't you forget it." Bomba then showed Scarlet one of the daggers he took from her, that she had hiding in her belt with a laugh. "Me could steal your undies and you wouldn't know it."

"You know what, I'd like to see you try." Scarlet wiggled her hips, her heart beating every glance she took at Bomba now. Walking to a clerk, she got his attention. "Oy! Got a question for you."

"Me gets 'em, me gets to keep 'em." Bomba snorted at her little wiggle. "As a trophy."

As Scarlet approached the clerk, he looked up at her.

"Yes, miss?"

"How much would it cost for a box of condoms?"

She let her words drip in the air as she gave a cheshire grin back at Bomba, savouring his reaction.

"Three rupees, please."

"..." Bomba's face turned red for a minute before he snickered. "Only one box?"

"I'll take three boxes." She was starting to get a little red herself. Turning to Bomba once more, her pearly white teeth grinned at him. "If you think you're man enough to handle that~"

"Me can take anything you throw at me. Even if ye throw ye self."

"We have a buy two, get one free special." The clerk then asked. "Also, if you're interested, we have a buy one get one special on lubes today. Our three most popular edibles are strawberry-banana, coconut-lime, and peach-mango. In the back of the store, there's lingerie for the ladies and the men if you're interested."

"I'll take four boxes and each of the lube. Lingerie isn't necessary." Scarlet started to take her rupees out to pay.

"Very well, miss." The clerk bagged up her purchase and took the payment. "For buying the specials, we've played a complimentary bottle of oil in the bag just for you and your lover. Thank you for shopping at Noctural Pleasures and have a good day."

"Me guesses we need to find a room next." Bomba chuckled with a wide grin. "Cause cap'n don't like it when we's rock the boat."

"After we find our target." Scarlet paid a boy on the dock to bring the new cargo back to the ship. Leaning down, she pinched Bomba's cock, satisfied he was growing an erection. "Let's go little man. Who knows how long it will take to find him~"

"Hmph, you's a tease, that's what you are, lassie." Bomba sulked at being denied at first and then yipped when she fondled his privates. Grasping her hand, he tugged her along in the streets. "Come on, hurry up, daylight's burning, and I wanna fuck, so let's find this reptile."

~

Halvar, Liz, and Bakura walked through a large pub, looking around. The older man made sure to keep an eye out on the two young adults every once in a while. Liz tapped her foot, some impatience getting to her. "Can you two cover my? I'm going to duck into one of the bathroom stalls quickly."

"Sure thing Liz."

Once Liz was out of sight, Bakura gave Halvar a slap on the back. "Look alive kid. You're way too focused on my daughter right now."

"Hey!" Halvar turned slightly red in the cheeks at Bakura's statement. "... she's beautiful. I can't help but look at her."

"Well, you haven't exactly inspired confidence in me that you're the right man for her. If all you're going to do is drool like a dog, and hump like a dog thinking about her..."

"I'm not a dog, I'm a fox." Halvar did not like being referred to as a dog. To a Direnor, it was an insult. He was often seen as a meek prince, but right now, he was mad. "I respect her, and I love her. I've made no advances because I want her to be ready to take that intimate step. I've been there to encourage her and help her through hard times." He said before he thought. "You don't exactly inspire confidence in me that you're a good father figure. After all, you did try to kill her once." The prince then said bitterly. "Don't try to bring me down with you. I'll be there for her thick and thin, no matter what the future brings us. I'd happily give my life for her, or any children we have in the future. I'm a good man, and Liz has accepted my offer of courtship. If she was not pleased with me, I'd know. So back off and butt out of our relationship. It's for me and her to decide what we wish to do, not you."

Halvar couldn't see it behind that mask, but Bakura was shocked, which quickly turned into him being impressed. He gave Halvar a slap on the back again and laughed. "That's the spirit lad. I'm how Lex would say, "Just fucking with you". Well you need to be there for her. And I think Liz would appreciate a little boldness. Just an inch."

Bakura held his hips and shook his head with a chuckle. "It's my job as a father to look out for my girls best interest. Sure, a part of me tried to kill her once, but what family hasn't wanted to kill each other at some point! If you're going to lay down your life for her, you have to be smart about it. You can't let anything distract you. Take, for example, if we find Adda, and you happen to be alone with a bombshell like her, what are you going to do?"

"Hmph." Halvar tried not to show he was sulking at the teasing from Bakura, and crossed his arms. "Liz wants to find Adda, we cannot let anything distract us now when we're so close. However, if we were alone together, and she was comfortable, and only if she was ready, then I would not object to mating. She is a fine woman and sometimes it's hard to hold myself back. My father and mother taught me to respect a female or else, she might claw your eyes out."

"Oh yes. Or she could see the demon in you, and make a catastrophic choice. If you catch Adda... let me get a chance to talk to her."

Before Halvar could ask more, Liz came out. "Alright, sorry for the wait. Was talking to a girl in the bathroom. She mentioned pirates like to hang out at a place called, "The Sun Pyramid."

"Hmm, I'll ask around for what that is. You two stick together."

Bakura left the couple alone as he asked around.

"Unlike you, I'm in control of my 'demon'." Halvar huffed at Bakura, and then quieted when Liz approached the two of them. He was exactly too keen on her overhearing their conversation. Though, as much as he hated to admit it, Bakura did have a point. It was now or never, he supposed. Anything could happen with this fight with Adda. "Liz?" Halvar turned to look at her. "I... I'm sorry if I embarrassed you the other night. Or if you think I don't want to mate with you, that's not the case. Sometimes, I keep repeating these proper rules in my head, and it's only gotten in the way. I don't want you to ever think you're a problem, you're my lover, and I'm yours." He took her hands, and kissed her knuckles. "Whenever you're ready, I'm happy to love you."

"Halvar..." Liz looked sadly at his hand. "I wish I was stronger with this aspect of my life, like other Gerudo woman. I just didn't want to hurt you. I didn't want you to feel forced into a situation, like... my mother would do to others." She looked back to him, kissing his fingers back. "I want to take things slow. Can we just... cuddle in bed? Like normal couples do?"

"Hey," Halvar tilted her chin up to look at him. "Whatever you want, whenever you want. I'll do what you're comfortable with, okay? Never think you're disappointing me. I love you too much for that."

"I... thank you." Liz leaned in to give him a quick kiss on the lips. "Let's ask around, shall we?"

~

Lex waved to the many pirates that were giving her whistles and cat calls. It didn't take long for her to get a lead out of one. She told him to meet her at the peer so she wouldn't have him nip at her feet the whole way for the rest of her search. "So, the Sun Pyramid. I wonder what we'll find there Captain Uncle."

"Was it really necessary to flirt with every male specimen on this island?" Corsaire groaned, wondering why he did not send Lex with Revy and Rat.

"Hey, they flirt with me! Besides, you said you wanted to look out for me, and keep me away from the nasty men~" Lex tickled her Uncle's chest teasingly. "Just jealous they're dropping better one liners than you give Princess Orana?"

"I invented one liners, lassie." Corsaire grumbled under his breath. "And I didn't give one liners to my wife. I treated her like a proper gentleman... and the first one liner I gave she only laughed at me, so I didn't give her no more."

"I bet. Well, I'm gonna keep doing what I do best. Being fabulous as fuck~"

Lex tapped her sunglasses as they walked through a jungle path. The Sun Pyramid was an actual pyramid, having been modified into a giant entertainment centre. On the right, exotic dancers, the left, a fighting ring for people to sort their shit out, but the main attraction was a giant casino.

"Holy shit. Think of all the money we could make here."

"Lex, we're here to get information, and get out. Time's a tick'in."

"I'm just saying." Lex took a deep breath. "Alright. I'll take the lead." Standing up on a staircase, Lex shouted loudly. "Who wants to gamble against me?! 100,000 worth of rupees on me!"

"IGNORE HER, SHE'S DRUNK!!!" Corsaire shouted and pulled Lex off the staircase and over his shoulder. "What the fuck do you think you're doing?! We're not here to stand out!"

"That's exactly what I'm doing. Getting attention." Lex pushed him away as some men approached. One was reptilian.

"Who's this guy?"

"Don't worry, he's my bitch."

"You serious about playing little girl?"

"That's woman to you scaly. And I am. Serious about winning."

"Alright. Who else wants to play with this spitfire?"

"... I hate you so much right now." Corsaire hissed under his breath to Lex, and then saw the crocodile man approach. "... she's only interested in one player at a time."

"Oy. Bitch. Did I give you permission to speak?" Lex raised her sunglasses at her Uncle, trying to act cool.

"I'm her uncle and I'm supervising her night out." Corsaire corrected Lex with a harsh slap on the butt as if she were an unruly kid. "Can't have no man taking advantage of my little girl now."

"Hmmm. And her I thought she was kind of gangster."

Lex yelped, and part of her spirit crumbled. Her image was being shattered by her Uncle. An cold anger built up inside in her. No one trusted her abilities. They either thought she was just a kid or a slut. She gave him a hard kick to the leg. "You're ruining my mystique. So piss off and get me a drink, while I take every bit of fucking coin these losers have."

Lex turned back to the man, glaring at her opponent, before giving a smile and a pretty face. "I am a gangster sweety. How about you draw your cards. We can do some Blackjack."

"Ha. Sure thing." The crocodilian man pointed to a dealer to cut them a deck.

"OOF!" Corsaire nearly dropped Lex when she kicked him. He growled at his niece, giving her a glare. Seer would not want her dealing with the scum of the earth. She was not in Uskar, the men here were not honorable. The bastards here would take advantage of her, cheat her, or worse, try to drug her and sell her as merchandise. "Fine." He snapped at her. "Don't come crying to me when they get the one up on you." With that, he stormed off to the bar. However, as Corsaire watched Lex play, he noticed how in control she was, how comfortable. Her porker face was on point, switching between cold, and full of playful emotion to throw her opponent off.

"So tell me, you seem so different than the other men here."

"It's the scales right? Humans love the scales."

"I do." Lex looked to the dealer. "Hit me."

Looking at her cards, she frowned, making a jiggle with her body. Her opponent thought he won. "Alright. I'm playing my hand." He placed a jack and a seven down. "You seem disappointed."

"Oh, I am!" Lex threw her hand down. A three, a ten, and a seven. "That I didn't get a full 21~"

"Fuck me..."

"Your rupees please~!"

The reptile growled. He thought he was tricking some kid. He wasn't supposed to actually lose this money. "Look. I need to actually get my money from my boss."

"Ooooo, what's the matter, need to cry to your captain? Why don't you bring him here? Maybe he can win the money back."

The man thought of that. "Stay right here sweetheart. He might just want to meet you."

Lex turned to her Uncle in the distance to give him the finger. As she waited, she saw the biggest reptile, barring dragons, in her life stomp forward. He was a big crocodile man, with a thick brown coat, a hat with a peacock feather, and a golden artificial right eye. His smile was filled with sharp, jagged teeth. "Hello sweetheart. My name is Captain Eltontor. How'd you like to make a wager?"

"Fuck me, she actually did it." Corsaire watched from the bar. He decided he'd only interfere if things got out of hand. If Lex wanted to play this game, she could.

"Oooo my~ Aren't you a big boy~"

"You don't know the half of it little snow flake~"

Lex giggled, hoping to fully entrance the big crocodile. She felt so much pride that she was the first to find their target. "So you aren't mad I beat your little boy in some gambling are you? I was thinking of buying some golden earrings."

"I think a golden chain would look better around you~"

"Oh stop it, you naughty man~" Lex waved her hand in a fun gesture. "So what's this gesture you have?"

"Oh, quite simple, I was thinking of a game of chance."

"Chance?"

"Yes. How'd about it?"

"Depends, what we talking here?"

"I love this particular game." Eltontor snapped his fingers and received a glass of liqueur. Pouring it into a bottle, he made it so it almost overflowed. "The rules are simple. You keep dropping coins into the glass until it spills. You can put as many coins as you like in, but if you spill, you lose."

Lex had never played this before. "Sounds fun."

"So I was thinking we could play for more than just money." The croc smiled down at Lex's body. The Gerudo smiled back, but not for the same reason. This is what she wanted. A chance to find her mother.

"I can agree to that. What do you want?"

"Well my dear, I was thinking when I win, I'll take you back to my ship. We can have all sorts of fun there."

"Ok. And if I win... you have to tell me where I can find Captain Adda."

That took Eltontor by surprise. "Captain Adda? The Queen of the Seas? Why do you want to find her?"

"Girls got her reason. I heard you know a way to find her, or, just as good, someone who does."

Eltontor grew visibly more nervous, tapping his claw. His instincts were telling him to drug this girl and take her away. "Well, little lady, I suppose I might."

"Than do we have a deal?"

"We do." Eltontor made a special click with his mouth and some of his men got them two different drinks.

"Your move, babydoll~"

Lex picked up five coins. This prompted everyone around the table to 'Ooooo' her. Eltontor chuckled. "You like to take big risks, I can tell. I wonder what other big things you like~"

"Please take your hand off the table dear." Lex breathed deeply, very, very carefully placing her fingers over the glass. Letting go, she dropped the coins. The liquid shifted, but didn't spill. Lex relaxed back into her set and took some of her drink. The young Gerudo woman felt confident she understood the level of liquid in the glass now.

"Hmmph. Impressive. My move." Eltontor took a coin from the side of the table, and put it over the glass. Smiling, he squeezed some hidden cotton, pouring additional liquid into the glass, unknowns to Lex.

Dropping his coin into the glass, Eltontor hid the cotton he used, and the glass shifted, but once more, didn't spill. "Heheheh. That was close. Your move."

Lex starred at the glass. She saw how the liquid shifted around. With one coin it shouldn't have moved like that. She should have had enough space to place one or two more coins in. What gives? Lex took a coin, uncertain.

"Well girly?"

"Give me a moment."

"I think we know that you lost."

"Shut up."

"Well, not everyone can be so certain."

Lex was afraid. She felt like she was going to lose. She gripped the glass with one hand, and steadily held her coin over the glass. She was gonna lose. She was going to be this freaks plaything. How could she fuck this up? She didn't want to. She didn't want to fail. So, to her surprise, and everyone else, when she dropped the coin, it didn't spill.

Eltontor was in shock and disbelief. "What? WHAT?!"

He quickly took a coin and dropped it in. Did he not pour enough liquid in? His glass shifted and the liqueur spilled out.

Lex smiled. Somehow she won. "Yes. YES! I DID IT!"

Eltontor threw the contents of the glass out and looked at it. Ice had formed above the tip of the edges, giving it a tiny little room for error. "You cheated me."

"What? No I didn't. Tell me about Adda you piece of luggage!"

"You little bitch. I think I know who you are now. You're one of Adda's girls, aren't you?"

Oh shit. That was not part of the plan.

With a loud 'clang' Corsaire's metal hand slammed on the table, causing the rupees and the drinks to clatter. The ex-pirate was pissed. He gave a cold stare to Eltontor, and put a hand on Lex's shoulder.

"Call her a bitch one more time and see where it gets you, lizard." Corsaire did not know if his reputation with the kraken still preceded him, but he did not care. No one was going to mess with his niece, even if she was acting like a little shit. He would make sure she was all right for Seer's sake. "She belongs with me. You think I didn't see that cotton? You think I don't know how you cheated and won this game? Or for the fact of the matter," He picked up Lex's drug and took a sniff. "That this roofie you put in her drink has a salty taste and oil residue it leaves on top? I know all your tricks and I know you're going to apologize or else, I'll beat your ugly skull in until they'll have to identify you by your bones. What's it going to be, reptile?"

Eltontor knew EXACTLY who this man was. How the hell did the legendary kraken slayer end up here? He was supposed to be retired. "Yeah, yeah, yeah, nah. How about this." The crocodile, grabbed the table and threw it at Corsaire and Lex, running through the casino to reach his boat. "WASTE THESE FOOLS! MILLION FOR THE MAN’S HEAD DEAD! ANOTHER MILLION FOR THE GIRL ALIVE!"

Corsaire reacted quickly, catching the table, ducking down and pulling Lex with him, using the furniture as a shield. He drew his gun, and shouted, "If anyone dares to fire at me, I'll set the damn kraken on their ship!!!" He leaned out from behind the table and fired a single shot... busting through Eltontor's kneecap.

Eltontor screamed, but still lurched along, his weight able to keep him up. His reptilian crew were the only ones to fire at Corsaire. Lex hated this and ran to the left. "I'm going after him! They want YOU dead, not me! Asshole thinks he can cheat ME!?" Lex growled, dodging the commotion all around her.

"YOU GET YOUR ASS BACK HERE!" Corsaire nearly screeched at Lex, trying to chase after the girl, but the bullets kept him pinned. "LEX!!!"

Lex found Eltontor getting into a speed boat, trailing blood. It started to take off, and Lex felt her heart sank. She fell for this pirates tricks. Once again, that cold sense of failure hit her. If they lost him, they lost a chance at her mother.

“No. NO YOU’RE NOT GETTING AWAY!” Lex willed it, and she thrust her hands to the water. The entire channel froze, lurching Eltontor's boat and sending him flying and skidding across belly first on the ice back towards her.

Lex was completely shocked. She had ice magic. She was a wizard! As she felt her new found confidence, and ready to tear some questions out of him, that was when the roofie hit her. Slumping to her feet, her head was suddenly killing her, and she threw up. Eltontor smiled, walking up to her. With a slap across the face, he knocked Lex to the ground. Picking her up with one hand, he held his cannon in the other. This little girl would make a great companion and a meatshield. Lex cursed in her haze. They found their quarry, but the plan was starting to fall apart. She heard Eltontor cry out in victory as her mind started to go blank. "Let's go men!"

[krinsbez]

Book Recommendations: Da Big List, Fiction Edition

Well, I said I’d do more book recs, so here we go...

(note that some of the series recs are out of date, with additional installments written since I previously updated the list) 

-Devil's Cape by Rob Rogers is the single best work of superhero prose I have ever read. -The Six-Gun Tarot by R. S. Belcher, in which the unusual inhabitants of a Wild West town (a sheriff who can't die, a deputy who's the son of Coyote, a housewife who used to be an assassin, and more) fight an Eldritch Abomination. Has two sequels, The Shotgun Arcana and The Queen of Swords -"Craft Sequence" series (six books and counting, starting with either Three Parts Dead or Last First Snow, depending on whether you want to read 'em in publication or chronological order, respectively), by Max Gladstone. Set in a modern-esque fantasy world that runs on corporate necromancy and "applied theocracy", the first (in publication order) involves a junior associate in a necromancy firm having to investigate the murder of the god who powers a steampunk city. -The Goblin Emperor by Katherine Addison, in which the half-goblin Unfavorite son of the Elven Emperor is unexpectedly raised to the throne after his father and half-brothers die in a zeppelin crash. -Daughter of the Sword by Steve Bein, in which a Tokyo policewoman catches a case that involves a Yakuza power struggle and a trio of magic swords, with extensive flashbacks (as in, they ultimately take up about half of the book) to the history of said swords. Has a sequel, Year of the Demon, in which the heroine goes up against a cult revolving around a mask tied to the swords. Also, more flashbacks. Now has a third sequel, Disciple of the Wind; there are also a couple of eNovellas, which I haven't read. -Eifelheim by Michael Flynn, in which a Renaissance-era village in Germany interact with a group of aliens whose ship crashed nearby. -Ancillary Justice by Ann Leckie, in which the last remnant of a space warship's AI seeks revenge on the ones who blew up the rest of her and...find out why they did it. Has two sequels, Ancillary Sword and Ancillary Mercy. -The Chinatown Death Cloud Peril by Paul Malmont, in which the creators of Doc Savage and The Shadow team-up with each other (and L. Ron Hubbard and someone else who is a minor spoiler) on an actual pulp adventure involving Nazi spies, a Chinese warlord, and something which is actually a BIG spoiler. Has a sequel, The Astounding, the Amazing, and the Unknown, in which Isaac Asimov, Robert Heinlein, and L. Sprague De Camp investigate Tesla's final invention. -Bridge of Birds by Barry Hughart, in which Master Li, a sage "with a slight flaw in his character", is hired by an immensely strong peasant named Number Ten Ox to investigate a mysterious plague afflicting his village in a "China that never was". Has two sequels, The Story of the Stone and Eight Skilled Gentlemen that are greatly inferior but still enjoyable. -The Kitty Norville books by Carrie Vaughn (15 books starting with Kitty and the Midnight Hour; the count includes a short-story collection and a side-novel starring a secondary character), about the host of a midnight radio show in Denver, who is also a newly turned werewolf. One night, instead of playing random music, she starts talking about the supernatural. Then vampires and other werewolves start calling in... -The Inspector Chen novels by Liz Williams (6 books starting with Snake Agent), about a police detective in a near future Singapore who investigates mysteries that require him to liaise with the Chinese versions of Hell and Heaven. -"Barsoom" series by Edgar Rice Burroughs (11 books, starting with A Princess of Mars): The ur-text of the Planetary Romance sub-genre, one of the definitional texts of soft SF. Rollicking adventures with epic characters in a marvelously imagined world. Long story short; a Civil War vet on the verge of death is astrally projected to not-yet-dead Mars, befriends a group of warlike natives, falls in love with the Princess of another, and turns the whole planet upside down in the name of love. Then he has kids... -"Lensman" series by E. E. "Doc" Smith (6 books; starting with either Triplanetary or Galactic Patrol, depending on your preferences): The granddaddy of all Space Operas, a triumphant example of power creep. The forces of Order and Chaos war for the fate of the universe, using the ultimate police force and an army of space pirates as proxies. -Last and First Men by Olaf Stapledon: An exploration of the future evolution of mankind. Starting in the '30s with the then-current state of the "First Men" (that is to say, Homo sapiens sapiens) until the extinction of the "Last Men" millions of years hence. Redefines epic scope. -Star-Maker by Olaf Stapledon: A companion of sorts to Last and First Men, except with with the scope turned up to eleven, covering billions of years and the entire universe. -Slan by A. E. Van Vogt: Jommy Cross is a Slan, an evolved human possessed of superior physical and mental abilities. Years ago, the Slans took over the world, but their regime was overthrown and now the Slans are hunted. When Jommy's parents are killed, he must learn to survive in a world that hates and fears him...or does it? Jampacked with twists and turns, not to mention being the archetypical "mutant hunt" novel. -Voyage of the Space Beagle by A. E. Van Vogt: The best and brightest of man's scientific minds have been sent into space to explore strange new worlds, and then figure out how to keep the life-forms they encounter from killing them. A rip-roaring tale of of space exploration, alien monsters, and an omnicompetent protagonist. Not only was it a major influence on Star Trek, one episode is the basis for Alien. -"Demon Princes" series by Jack Vance (5 books starting with The Star King): Years ago, the five most dangerous criminals in the known universe joined together to murder or enslave the inhabitants of a small colony. Now the sole survivor is hunting them down one-by-one across the galaxy... The narrative is a great combination of action and mystery, and the setting is full of all manner of interesting worlds and civilizations. -"Planet of Adventure" series by Jack Vance (4 books, starting with City of the Chasch): An Earthman crash-lands on a planet inhabited by four alien species, and the humans they've enslaved, travels the world to find a way home. A marvelous exploration of the concept of Blue-And-Orange Morality. -"Sector General" series by James White (12 books, starting with Hospital Station): Life aboard a massive, multi-species hospital space station in a deeply idealistic 'verse with one of the most diverse bunch of aliens ever devised. The first six books are mostly collections of short stories featuring medical mysteries solved by Dr. Conway (the primary exception is the second book, which is mostly a novella set against the backdrop of an interstellar war and brilliantly inverts the "Hard Man Making Hard Decisions" trope), as he goes from being a trainee to one of the hospital's elite, while the latter six are novels featuring an assortment of characters. -"Cobra" series by Timothy Zahn (9 books and counting, starting with Cobra): A multi-generational tale of super-soldiers in war and peace, with a healthy helping of interstellar diplomacy. A really interesting take on MilSF, where out-of-the-box thinking takes center stage. -"Quadrail" series by Timothy Zahn (5 books, starting with Night Train To Rigel): Frank Compton, former agent of the human government, finds himself working for the mysterious aliens who run the local 'verse's sole form of interstellar travel; a train in space called the Quadrail. Intrigue, action, and plot twists abound, including one of the best Heel Face Turns I have ever encountered. -"Stainless Steel Rat" series by Harry Harrison (11 books, starting with The Stainless Steel Rat, and one short story, which can be found in the collection Stainless Steel Visions). In a far future where mankind has spread across the stars, crime has been eliminated. Well, that's what the authorities would like you to believe; in truth there are still a small handful of individuals maladjusted enough to commit crimes and smart enough to get away with them. James Bolivar "Slippery Jim" Digriz, the Stainless Steel Rat, may be the smartest of them all, a white collar thief and con artist who's almost pathological disregard for law and authority is balanced by a surprisingly strong moral code. Which is why when he is finally caught, the authorities put him to work catching criminals who lack those morals. This is classic SF comedy, with a surprising amount of pathos at points. -"The Parasol Protectorate" series by Gail Carriger (five books, starting with Soulless). A humorous and exciting tale of love, intrigue, mad scientists, and fashion in an alternate Victorian era where the British Empire's power derives from steampunk technology, werewolf soldiers, and vampire politicians. Has a sequel series, "The Custard Protocol" (3 books and counting, starting with Prudence) revolving around the daughter of the original protagonist. Has a YA prequel spinoff, "Finishing School" (4 books, starting with Ettiquette and Espionage) revolving around a teenager who is recruited by a boarding school that trains spies. There are, in addition, a manga adaptation of the first couple books. -Ports of Call by Jack Vance. Myron Tany has always dreamed of traveling the Gaean Reach. When his eccentric aunt acquires a spaceship, it seems his dream has come true...until she ends up marooning him on random planet. Fortunately, Myron is able to obtain a position as supercargo aboard the merchant ship Glicca. The story does not really have a plot per se, consisting primarily of a series of marvelous picaresque vignettes as Myron and his crew-mates travel to different worlds delivering cargo, trying to acquire additional cargo, and periodically running afoul of bizarre local customs. The book just kinda stops at one point, and resumes in a second book, entitled Lurulu. I'm not really describing this well, but they're both very fun, beautifully written books. -The Green and the Gray by Timothy Zahn. A night on the town for a young New York couple takes a turn for the weird when they are forced, at gunpoint, to take custody of a 12-year old girl. They soon find themselves enmeshed in a secret Cold War between two alien races that have secretly been living in the city for generations...a Cold War that is threatening to turn hot. -The Rook by Daniel O'Malley. A young woman awakens surrounded by corpses with no memory of who she is. In her pocket is a letter from her pre-amnesia self, one Myfanwy Thomas. It seems that Myfanwy was a senior bureaucrat for the covert organization in charge of controlling magic and other such weirdness in Britain, and that her amnesiac state is something that was done to her. Myfanwy must therefore investigate the mystery of precisely who that is, while simultaneously do a job about which she knows nothing, without letting anyone realize what's happened to her. Ha a sequel, Stiletto, though I cannot explain the plot without spoiling the previous book. -Throne of the Crescent Moon by Saladin Ahmed. A tale in which an elderly demon-hunting cleric and his paladin assistant team-up with a shape-shifting barbarian girl and husband and wife alchemists to prevent an undead villain unleash an ancient evil, while trying not get involved between the conflict between the tyrannical ruler of their city and a gentleman thief-turned-revolutionary. Did I mention that the cleric's spells invoke the name of Allah, the paladin is a dervish, the barbarian is a Bedouin, and the whole setting draws it's cues not from Tolkien but the Arabian Nights? -"White Trash Zombie" by Diana Rowland (6 books and counting, starting with My Life As a White Trash Zombie). Angel Crawford is an unemployed high school dropout in rural Louisiana with a deadbeat dad, an asshole boyfriend, a drug habit, and no future. After one particularly wild night of drinking and drugging, she gets into a devastating car accident...and wakes up in the hospital without a scratch on her to find that an unknown benefactor has arranged for her to have a job at the Coroner's Office. Which is good because she now has a hankering for brains... -Under the Moons of Mars: New Adventures on Barsoom edited by John Joseph Adams. Exactly what is says on the tin, a collection of original stories set on Barsoom by an assortment of writers. As with any anthology, quality is a bit uneven; some of the stories are excellent Original Flavor pastiches, some are deconstructions or parodies, one or two are just bad. But all in all a great collection. -Worlds of Edgar Rice Burroughs edited by Mike Resnick and Robert T. Garcia. Same basic idea, but for the entire Burroughs oevure, including some of his non-SFnal work. -"Winter of the World" series by Michael Scott Rohan (two trilogies, the first starting with The Anvil of Ice, the second place taking place before the first and in another part of the world, and which I haven't been able to get my hands on ), an epic fantasy taking place against the backdrop of an Ice Age, in which a young man rises from slavery to become the most powerful smith-cum-magician the world has ever known, and together with some companions fights to defeat the sinister primal forces that wish to cover the world in glaciers forever. Much less generic than it sounds, even without going into the appendixes which reveal the real(ish) science behind quite a bit of the magic. -"Spiral Arm" series by Michael Flynn (4 books, starting with The January Dancer). Moderately Irish-flavored space opera, the first book tells the tale of of how a random space captain found a pre-human artifact, of the various hands said artifact passed into, and the conflicts that sprung up in it's wake. The second book turns the first's framing sequence into an epic of it's own, as a young bard hunts down the truth of her parentage. The series notably involves massive retcons with each volume, revealing that what we thought was going on was actually something else, but does so in a way that's compelling rather than irritating. -Dr. Jay Hosler is an entomologist who has written four edutational graphic novels for children (Clan Apis, The Sandwalk Adventures, Optical Allusions, and Last of the Sandwalkers). I've read three and they are amazing. In Clan Apis, a young honeybee desperately searches for her place in the hive, and ultimately finds an unorthodox solution. In The Sandwalk Adventures, an elderly Charles Darwin tries to convince a follicle mite living in his eyebrow that he's not God, by teaching him about evolution. In Last of the Sandwalkers (no relation)...honestly, the story contains so much epic awesomeness, I just want to list it, but it's all spoilers; suffice to say that the title character is A: a beetle, B: could give Sam Carter and Agatha Heterodyne a run for their money in the mad science department, and C: leads an expedition to explore the unknown and along the way discovers truths about her family and the nature of her people's civilization that some people really don't want her to (also you learn stuff about beetles). -Nightwise by R. S. Belcher. Years ago, Laytham Ballard was the Golden Boy of the occult underworld sub-culture. That was a LONG time ago, and no one would ever mistake Laytham for golden. But he's not so much of a bastard that he'll refuse the last request of one of his few remaining friends. What was supposed to be a simple revenge killing, however, turns out to be a lot more complicated and a lot more dangerous than Laytham ever imagined. Has a sequel, The Night Dahlia, which I have yet to read. -Brotherhood of the Wheel by R. S. Belcher. Jimmy Aussapile is an independent trucker, hauling cargo cross-country to support his pregnant wife and teenage daughter; he is also a member of a secret order descended from the Knights Templar that protects the highways of America from monsters both human and not. An encounter with a hitchhiking ghost finds him heading off on a quest, in which he joins forces with the heir apparent of monster-fighting outlaw biker gang who's military service unleashed some serious inner demons, and a State Trooper who's determination to solve a series of child abductions leads her to go rogue. Together, they must battle an ancient evil involving serial killers, human sacrifice, and Black-Eyed Kids. Note that it's loosely tied to Nightwise, in which Jimmy shows up in one scene as a minor side character; meanwhile, an off-hand reference to Laytham is made at one point in Brotherhood, and a minor plot thread in the later novel relates to a major plot thread in the earlier. They aren't even the same genre, with Nightwise being urban fantasy noir instead of horror. All in all, one doesn't have to have read one to enjoy the other,

[aion-rsa]

Emmys 2021: Complete List of Winners

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Television’s biggest night is finally here! No, it’s not the M*A*S*H finale or any of the three Super Bowls Tom Brady lost – it’s the 2021 Emmy Awards ceremony.

This is the second Emmys in a row under pop culture’s new normal. The pandemic still trudges along and television now occupies a particularly prominent space in many households While the 2020 Emmy Awards went virtual, this year’s ceremony will be in-person at Los Angeles’s Microsoft Theater and hosted by Cedric the Entertainer. Hopefully the return to a big ballroom will provide plenty of elbow room for a jam-packed list of nominees.

This is the year that the Marvel machine officially makes its way into the television award landscape. Disney+ series WandaVision is nominated for 23 total awards, including the night’s biggest honor in Outstanding Limited Series. Meanwhile Apple TV+ scored a big hit with Ted Lasso, which broke the record for most nominations for a freshman comedy with 20. HBO continues to be a big awards presence thanks to Mare of Easttown. And then there’s the Netflix of it all with favorites like The Queen’s Gambit and The Crown.

The 73rd annual Emmy Awards has all the makings of a wild night. Follow along with each category and its winners here. Winners will be bolded and italicized.

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Outstanding Supporting Actress in a Comedy Series

Rosie Perez – The Flight Attendant Hannah Einbinder – Hacks Aidy Bryant – Saturday Night Live Kate McKinnon – Saturday Night Live Cecily Strong – Saturday Night Live Juno Temple – Ted Lasso Hannah Waddingham – Ted Lasso

Outstanding Supporting Actor in a Comedy Series

Carl Clemons-Hopkins – Hacks Paul Reiser – The Kominsky Method Kenan Thompson – Saturday Night Live Bowen Yang – Saturday Night Live Brett Goldstein – Ted Lasso Brendan Hunt – Ted Lasso Nick Mohammed – Ted Lasso Jeremy Swift – Ted Lasso

Outstanding Supporting Actress in a Limited/Anthology Series or Movie

Renee Elise Goldsberry – Hamilton Phillipa Soo – Hamilton Julianne Nicholson – Mare of Easttown Jean Smart – Mare of Easttown Moses Ingram – The Queen’s Gambit Kathryn Hahn – WandaVision

Outstanding Supporting Actor in a Limited/Anthology Series or Movie

Daveed Diggs – Hamilton Jonathan Groff – Hamilton Anthony Ramos – Hamilton Paapa Essiedu – I May Destroy You Evan Peters – Mare of Easttown Thomas Brodie-Sangster – The Queen’s Gambit

Outstanding Writing for a Drama Series

Rebecca Sonnenshine – The Boys “What I Know” Peter Morgan – The Crown “The War” Yahlin Chang – The Handmaid’s Tale “Home” Misha Green – Lovecraft Country “Sundown” Dave Filoni – The Mandalorian “Chapter 13: The Jedi” Jon Favreau – The Mandalorian “Chapter 16: The Rescue” Ryan Murphy, Brad Falchuk, Steven Canals, Janet Mock, Our Lady J – Pose “Series Finale”

Outstanding Directing for a Drama Series

Julie Anne Robinson – Bridgerton “Diamond of the First Water” Benjamin Caron – The Crown “Fairytale” Jessica Hobbs – The Crown “War” Liz Garbus – The Handmaid’s Tale “The Wilderness” Jon Favreau – The Mandalorian “Chapter 9: The Marshal” Steven Canals – Pose “Series Finale”

Outstanding Supporting Actress in a Drama Series

Gillian Anderson – The Crown Helena Bonham Carter – The Crown Emerald Fennell – The Crown Madeline Brewer – The Handmaid’s Tale Ann Dowd – The Handmaid’s Tale Yvonne Strahovski – The Handmaid’s Tale Samira Wiley – The Handmaid’s Tale Aunjanue Ellis – Lovecraft Country

Outstanding Supporting Actor in a Drama Series

Tobias Menzies – The Crown O-T Fagbenle – The Handmaid’s Tale Max Minghella – The Handmaid’s Tale Bradley Whitford – The Handmaid’s Tale Michael K. Williams – Lovecraft Country Giancarlo Esposito – The Mandalorian John Lithgow – Perry Mason Chris Sullivan – This Is Us

Outstanding Writing for a Variety Series

A Black Lady Sketch Show Last Week Tonight with John Oliver Saturday Night Live The Amber Ruffin Show Late Show with Stephen Colbert

Outstanding Variety Talk Series

Conan The Daily Show with Trevor Noah Jimmy Kimmel Live Last Week Tonight with John Oliver Late Show with Stephen Colbert

Outstanding Variety Sketch Series

A Black Lady Sketch Show Saturday Night Live

Outstanding Writing for a Comedy Series

Steve Yockey – The Flight Attendant “In Case of Emergency” Meredith Scardino – Girls5eva “Pilot” Lucia Aniello, Paul W. Downs, Jen Statsky – Hacks “There Is No Line” Maya Erskine – Pen15 “Play” Jason Sudeikis, Brendan Hunt, Joe Kelly – Ted Lasso “Make Rebecca Great Again” Jason Sudeikis, Bill Lawrence, Brendan Hunt, Joe Kelly – Ted Lasso “Pilot”

Outstanding Directing for a Comedy Series

James Burrows – B Positive “Pilot” Susanna Fogel – The Flight Attendant “In Case of Emergency” Lucia Aniello – Hacks “There Is No Line” James Widdoes – Mom “Scooby-Doo Checks and Salisbury Steak” Zach Braff – Ted Lasso “Biscuits” MJ Delaney – Ted Lasso “The Hope That Kills You” Declan Lowney – Ted Lasso “Make Rebecca Great Again”

Outstanding Lead Actress in a Comedy Series

Aidy Bryant – Shrill Kaley Cuoco – The Flight Attendant  Allison Janney – Mom Tracee Ellis Ross – Black-ish Jean Smart – Hacks

Outstanding Lead Actor in a Comedy Series

Anthony Anderson – Black-ish Michael Douglas – The Kominsky Method William H. Macy – Shameless Jason Sudeikis – Ted Lasso Kenan Thompson – Kenan

Outstanding Competition Program

The Amazing Race Nailed It! Ru Paul’s Drag Race Top Chef The Voice

Outstanding Directing for a Limited/Anthology Series or Special

Thomas Kail – Hamilton Sam Miller, Michaela Coel – I May Destroy You “Ego Death” Sam Miller – I May Destroy You “Eyes Eyes Eyes Eyes” Craig Zabel – Mare of Easttown Scott Frank – The Queen’s Gambit Barry Jenkins – The Underground Railroad Matt Shakman – WandaVision

Outstanding Writing for a Limited/Anthology Series or Special

Michaela Coel – I May Destroy You Brad Ingelsby – Mare of Easttown Scott Frank – The Queen’s Gambit Chuck Hayward, Peter Cameron – WandaVision “All-New Halloween Spooktacular!” Jan Schaeffer – WandaVision “Filmed Before a Live Studio Audience” Laura Donney – WandaVision “Previously On”

Outstanding Lead Actress in a Limited/Anthology Series or Movie

Michaela Coel – I May Destroy You Cynthia Erivo – Aretha Elizabeth Olsen – WandaVision Anya Taylor-Joy – The Queen’s Gambit Kate Winslet – Mare of Easttown

Outstanding Lead Actor in a Limited/Anthology Series or Movie

Paul Bettany – WandaVision Hugh Grant – The Undoing Ewan McGregor – Halston Lin-Manuel Miranda – Hamilton Leslie Odom Jr. – Hamilton

Outstanding Lead Actress in a Drama Series

Uzo Aduba – In Treatment Olivia Colman – The Crown Elisabeth Moss – The Handmaid’s Tale Mj Rodriguez – Pose Jurnee Smollett – Lovecraft Country

Outstanding Lead Actor in a Drama Series

Sterling K. Brown – This is Us Jonathan Majors – Lovecraft Country Josh O’Connor – The Crown Rege-Jean Page – Bridgerton Billy Porter – Pose Matthew Rhys – Perry Mason

Outstanding Comedy Series

Black-ish Cobra Kai Emily in Paris The Flight Attendant Hacks The Kominsky Method  Pen15 Ted Lasso

Outstanding Drama Series

The Boys Bridgerton The Crown The Handmaid’s Tale Lovecraft Country The Mandalorian Pose This is Us

Outstanding Limited/Anthology Series

I May Destroy You Mare of Easttown The Queen’s Gambit The Underground Railroad WandaVision

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