#the Lady sleuths we need

[angelesca]

over and over, you read the sign outside a small agency, rolling the name in your head and flipping it up and down: teyvat's sleuth operatives, sleuth operatives... sounds tacky and lame...

it is only when a brown-haired someone approaches you, that your doubts are erased. their uniform neat, mastering the archetype of a professional private investigator, amber eyes unexpecting your early arrival. “you must be the new recruit, why don’t you come inside?”

edit: i think my tumblr is finally working again, hopefully this post works(-ω-、) w.c. ~3.5k / content: modern au! private investigators (PI) au! [not canon, slight ooc?] bulletpoints and scenarios, writing out of my arse again, lil' crack, another gang of idiots, total braincells: 8.88 (a high score!!), surprisingly they co-exist pretty well, zhongli doesn't know what a waffle maker is, you and childe watch a traumatic talent show, alhaitham's love lang is bickering with you, and wrio has a depressing backstory👍, tldr; working with 4 very fun guys / boss!zhongli / rival!childe / childhood friend!alhaitham / colleague!wriothesley / x gnreader

𝐳𝐡𝐨𝐧𝐠𝐥𝐢 as your boss!

✦ oldest member, worked in the profession for many years. however, when you ask about that, he is suspiciously evasive. zhongli seems to have lived a long life, though his appearance does not tell it

✦ out of touch with the new generation and technology. asks alhaitham to fix his computer and the kettle (bro just needed to plug it in) or asks you what the newest trendy slang means. it is a wonder how he manages the workplace

✦ tea buddies with wriothesley. hosts tea parties in the local retirement home to discuss and rate tea (power scaling tea real). there's enough boxes to last a lifetime in the breakroom. oh, zhongli is pointing at the clock. it’s… tea time… again

✦ talks your ear off about philosophical questions such as what happens after death, or whether a hotdog is a sandwich

✦ you and childe share a joint role as zhongli’s personal wallet. as to what your boss spends his paycheck on… maybe the countless snacks he leaves at your desk. and tea. more tea. poosssiibly those trinkets he has gifted you too

✦ glasses wearer. appears when zhongli is in deep concentration, due to an unexpected influx of cases so he's staring at the computer often, or during an intense reading session

ᯓ★

you flick through the papers detailing the information you recorded from your client. you and zhongli are out on a scouting mission to obtain clues that could point the case in the right direction. “are you listening?”

“mhm,” zhongli claims, but you can see your words are flowing in one ear and out the other with the way he is plucking free food samples as if they were flowers, bunched together in his hand like a bouquet, offered to him by the fawning ladies at the market stalls. the foreboding premonition of another unproductive day is brimming to the surface.

“where should we start?” you clear your throat, keeping the task on track.

“we should entertain any threads and trace it back, even if it proves to be a dead end. there is no such thing as a bad clue,” zhongli pauses in front of a shop. “for starters, what’s this?”

you raise an eyebrow. “a waffle maker.”

“interesting. what about this?”

“a robot vacuum cleaner. would be good for the office.”

“indeed,” zhongli’s eyes shift. “and this? such a profound colour, this corrosive yellow that erodes my vision is quite unpleasant. could it be…? is this a weapon of mass destruction?”

“zhongli, sir, that’s a banana.“ you shake your head. “is this important?”

zhongli nods. “could be. is it really a banana? a true investigator must question even the simplest of theories.” he points a finger at your pocket. “and this?”

“... that’s my wallet.” 

zhongli has a penchant for being attracted to your money, if he can trace the imprint of your wallet against your pocket. 

zhongli nods, closing his eyes. “a sacred item indeed,” he opens one eye which looks at you expectantly. “i suspect you have quite a formidable sum of mora on your person. and mora is an imperative factor that may save the day, or destroy the world. after all, we still do not know if the banana is deceiving us in its testimony, hm?” 

you give up, handing the money over to the shopkeeper.

his philosophy remains a cryptic language to you. perhaps it’s the gap in experience that makes it hard to connect a bridge to whatever planet zhongli lives on, a divide in universes between you, a disciple, and a master. sometimes, you do believe that there’s a rip in time and space with how zhongli’s senses lag behind as if stuck in the past.

you hand one over to your side. “here—huh?” where did he go?

one look behind you and you find zhongli by a lamp post. a young girl, scratching the ground with a sharp branch with a pout, gazes at zhongli. “who are you?”

zhongli slowly crouches down. “someone who listens to everyone’s troubles. would you mind telling me yours?”

no response. then, a small stomach growls.

zhongli motions at you. immediately, you walk over. “may i take one of the bananas?” you hand him one. “why don’t you take this?”

despite her embarrassed expression, the girl grabs it. she hesitates. “... mama, gone.”

your lips part in realisation.

“come now, we’ll help find your parents.” zhongli offers a hand but the girl extends his invitation, taking his whole arm instead, hugging it. he chuckles, picking her up, her arms naturally cradling his neck as if he is family.

you observe the warm scene, smiling. “you’d make a pretty good parent.” 

zhongli watches you, quiet for a moment. “why don't we raise one together?”

“oh, i’m not—”

“alhaitham can be the teacher; wriothesley will do the cleaning. i can do the cooking, and childe can do all the shopping. you can play the toys with the child.”

“ah. of course,” teyvat’s sleuth operatives is one big family, after all. you have to ask, “also, that banana, how did you know to buy it?”

“well, who knows?” zhongli pats the girl’s back, helping her fall asleep. there’s a glint in his eyes when he looks at you, asking you to work out the mystery. to chase after the clues he left.

another cryptic answer. the master really does live in another world—one that you want to keep learning about.

𝐜𝐡𝐢𝐥𝐝𝐞 as your rival!

✦ works for the rival agency which, unfortunately, is much more popular. when watching cat videos, their adverts often pop up with childe’s annoying face plastered on it, winking at you

✦ tags along when you are on a case. doesn’t he have anything else to do? at least he buys your fav drink from the vending machines. although he trails around you like baggage, you hate to say that he is good at what he does.

✦ … a bit too good at his job. you’ve spotted him slinking into dark alleys occasionally. what’s he doing there? one day you will know.

✦ trained under zhongli before. therefore, he is lowkey in competition with you. any task is met with the following question: who’s the better apprentice? so far, the score is even, but you’ll get him next time

✦ never enters your agency through the front door. opts to crawl in through the window (no idea why, maybe it's the challenge). comes bearing gifts such as expensive fruit baskets, bouquets, and medicinal roots like ginseng. you’d think he’s meeting his in-laws or something. rare, but may bring his younger brother teucer as well. on these days, teyvat’s sleuth operatives becomes half private agency and half daycare. 

✦ for uniform, the red shirt from his birthday art is nice. maybe a leather jacket that hangs on the shoulder. wears accessories: earrings, rings, bracelets, watches, gloves. bro is something of a fashion icon, tbf he’s rich so might as well

ᯓ★

desolation unwraps itself before you, beckoning its finger at you to sink into the drab swamps. you saw a tuft of ginger hair disappear into this alley, submerged by its fog. it is inevitable; you need to know the truth behind the mystery to quell the ‘investigator’ in you. 

as soon as you think that, your face hits against, according to your common sense, a wall—if the wall defined was actually an amalgamation of flesh and muscle. 

“need our help?” 

a voice irritates your ears. you frown, looking up at the culprit. “you can’t steal our catchphrase like that, childe.” 

childe—your rival, your nemesis, the guy who childishly filled a ketchup bottle with strawberry jam so that he could chug it in front of you, without flinching, solely to disgust you, and counted it as a victory—that childe, shrugs his shoulders nonchalantly.

“boss, who’s dat?” a voice calls from the darkness.

your ears perk up. boss? childe? a responsible leader? no way. you push childe aside. “... who are you guys?”

a whole lot of people are uncomfortably staring at you. “us?” one man stands out from the crowd. “the fatui, duh. have ya not heard of us, newbie?” the man proudly puffs his chest out.

childe rubs his forehead. “you doofus.”

bells were ringing in your head, red alarms were sounding. “the fatui? aren’t you guys wanted?”

before you can reach for your phone, childe catches your hand. “don’t,” his tone is rigid. it takes you by surprise. “look,” childe sighs. “they’re not bad people, promise.” he lets go.

a fatui agent is dancing. “yup, we have many talents, like stealing lunch money.” that is literally illegal. “say, why don’t we host a talent show?”

“oooooh!!” a chorus of easily amused delight.

“me! me!” a burly man wearing a tank top and shorts, holds up a jar of hotdogs. he twists open the lid.

you and childe exchange glances. the next sequence of events you witness are really unfortunate. “oh– please don’t shove that up your– well, okay then.” the sky looks especially wonderful today.

these guys should be in prison after all. 

“ahaha, okay, okay,” childe gestures with his hands, asking everyone to quiet down. “alas, this should be enough–”

“but i can break into people’s houses without triggering the alarm system!”

“i can use my anemo vision to amplify my fart!”

“aha…” the light in childe’s face falters. suddenly, he grabs your hand. “run!”

“—!” in an instant, your legs suddenly burst into strides, finding the right pace to keep up with childe. “where are we going?!”

“anywhere! anywhere is good!” under the sky, the breeze carries his airy laughter. in his eyes, the blue sea parts, a brightness coruscating on its horizon. it is refreshing, brilliant, childish. and vulnerable. 

you can’t help getting carried along by the waves.

.

“i should report you… for almost getting me killed by an anemo-amplified fart,” hands on your knees, the words struggle out of your mouth.

“sorry about that, they’re just really friendly.” he laughs. you notice, the way childe expresses himself towards the fatui, it is a delicate artistry woven with heartfelt tenderness. it’s the same fragileness as when he talks about his family and home. “how about i buy you a drink?” 

you contemplate his offer. after taking a few more breaths, you stand up. “even though i know you meddle with the fatui? how does a vending machine drink suffice?” childe tilts his head, encouraging you to speak. “for a week straight at least. there’s a new cafe opening, but the prices are too steep for my wallet.”

“okay, okay,” his gentle, tender voice extends to you, lifted by a smile. the blue sea parts, and behind it is childe, offering you a place in his home. “you win this time.”

𝐚𝐥𝐡𝐚𝐢𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐦 as your childhood friend!

✦ more like estranged childhood friend. you left teyvat at a young age, leaving your childhood friend, alhaitham, behind. you only returned recently, surprised to find that little alhaitham grew up well 

✦ does not concern himself with anything that doesn't yield results, keeps conversations succinct, conveying what needs to be said for the job with as little words as possible. only interjects if something intrigues him, or when anyone makes a clueless comment that needs correcting

✦ favours are not regarded well. one time, you asked him to grab you some coffee if he was going out for lunch break. alhaitham sighed, listing the side effects of overconsumption on caffeine and how a sufficient amount of sleep will do you better. although, when you came back to the office after an outing, you found a mysterious cup of coffee on your desk. must be the wind

✦ dislikes outputting energy where it’s not needed. when finished with his tasks, he will head to the breakroom or the corner with the bookshelf to relax until zhongli’s next order. rarely seen at his desk

✦ went to uni for a comp sci degree but it wasn't challenging enough. dropped out, but zhongli, a guest lecturer, managed to recruit him after witnessing his talent. has rejected prestigious titles and positions in favour of a peaceful life. but with you in the picture, he wonders how long this peace would last

✦ wears strapped pouches and harnesses… around the chest... and biceps... straps around the thighs... (;´༎ຶٹ༎ຶ`) for utility ofc. equipped with useful items for the job, like a gps tracker, voice recorders, spy cameras, and his music player. 

ᯓ★

“can you afford to be slacking off right now?” the silence breaks, and you are forced to speak.

“i’m not.” you quickly glance at the time on your screen. “besides, i should start heading home before the last train runs—”

“the last train has already gone.”

“... great.” you sigh. “how come you didn’t tell me earlier?”

“the sharp possibility that you’d insist on finishing your work is comparable to chasing after a dead end, and ultimately, a waste of time.”

a trained oracle, predicting every branching future based on your rooted disposition. it is difficult to debate against that which has inputted all your details, computing every possible output.

you rest your chin on your palm. “what are you even doing here? shouldn’t you be getting your healthy eight hours of sleep?” 

“and in the time that has spanned since you’ve sat at your desk, shouldn’t you be done already?”

you object, “you can’t deflect me with a question.”

“which principle asserts otherwise? i can.”

“you can’t.”

“can.”

“can’t.”

“can–”

you sigh frustratedly, knowing that you’re talking to a wall. throw your words at it and it bounces right back, a ball hitting at you squarely. 

with purpose, you blurt out, “little haitham was so much cuter, you used to follow me everywhere.”

and finally, alhaitham looks at you for the first time today. and for the first time today, you get a good look at him too. his posture manages to be effortlessly upright, not a lick of exhaustion burdened on his face.

“why are you bringing that up?” alhaitham returns to his monitor.

the buzzing of the ceiling light fills the silence. you blink. once. “we promised to the stars that we’d be the best detective duo in teyvat.” the mechanical clicking of keyboards clogs your ears. blink. you tug at the cuffs of your sleeve. “to solve all the mysteries, crimes, and beat up the bad people hiding in the world.” 

sounds of the mouse clicking. a pause builds. alhaitham glances at you. “and? we’re doing that pretty well, aren’t we?” you can’t tell if he’s being sarcastic.

“i thought you’ve forgotten about that,” you admit.

“it was you who forgot.”

you sit up. “come again?” your eyes twinkle, watching alhaitham, your childhood friend. the hope that swells on your face, and alhaitham notices it; the stars in your eyes, he’s tracing the constellations in them. 

"why do you think i'm here in the first place?" his voice dips, as if hoping you didn't hear that.

a promise embedded in the stars, and one of them was waiting for the fated reunion. then, in a split second, you see a younger haitham tugging at your sleeve, following your footsteps. you hide the smile behind your hand. “you’ve been waiting for me all this time?”

“don’t flatter yourself.” alhaitham quickly extinguishes. ouch. another pause washes over before he speaks up, “come over.”

your eyes widen. “over? where?”

“to mine.”

“mine? yours?”

“my apartment. it’s close by.”

“your place?”

“yes,” alhaitham glares at you. “do i happen to be speaking in another language?”

“i mean, how come?” 

“i do not want to be investigating a missing person’s case anytime soon,” alhaitham stands up, packing his belongings, leaving you no choice but to swiftly follow suit. “and our photo albums,” he stops moving. “i've kept them.” 

your heart skips, touched by the rare sincerity. you tease, “so you do care about me.”

alhaitham scoffs. “it's only a sensible suggestion. i don’t.”

“you do.”

“don’t.”

“oh, come on.”

𝐰𝐫𝐢𝐨𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐬𝐥𝐞𝐲 as your colleague!

✦ was classmates with you at a police academy. by the academy was an arcade where you two played too many games. after graduation, you two silently seperated. wriothesley worked in enforcement for some years before gaining his investigators licence, moved to teyvat, and eventually settled at teyvat’s sleuth operatives

✦ your current hangout place with wriothesley is still an arcade, the one by the agency - it reminds you two of the past. favourite games include money-grubbing claw machines, boxing machines, and “dancing dance rev rev” (i dont wanna get sued–). that, or you end up chatting the day away about whatever new complaints you received from alhaitham, not realising the sun has set and the owner ends up shooing you two out

✦ owns a red motorbike. will take you on rides for fun, watching sunsets on the highway feeling the breeze. will take you home whenever you need—just give him a call. he insists that the best place to hold onto is around his waist

✦ the tea connoisseur of all time. drinks a minimum of 5 cups a day, and you worry he might drop dead one day. you’ve tried to get him onto different drinks, like the popular boba tea, but plain old tea always triumphs in the end. tea is life and zhongli agrees

✦ good at subduing any targets. prefers not to shed blood, but will deescalate confrontations, usually by submission rather than violence

✦ messy uniform. shirt not buttoned all the way up, rolled sleeves, fingerless gloves, dark colours. often seen with bandages along his arm. wears a choker. like a werewolf, rugged

ᯓ★

years back, before you returned to teyvat, you attended a police academy to aid in the preparation and experience needed for your investigators licence.

you always frequented the desolate arcade by the academy. there was no door, the arcade was impartial to any of its visitors, like an open hug.

time and time again, you blew your stress off after a long day. the boxing machine was particularly satisfying in that regard. you and that machine watched the early evening resign, and the night shift taking over everyday. 

the tedium was so easily penetrated by soaking crimson, the liquid leaked vividly dripping down from the forehead. a moment was needed for you to process it. 

a dark-haired person sat languidly against an arcade machine, in a uniform you recognise. half bent-over, head tilting. the sanctity of life departing through hurried breaths. 

“h-hey,” you crouched next to him, hands outstretched but were waiting for a coherent command. “shit.” the lectures slipped by you, running past but never handing the baton. it felt useless.

suddenly, your hand was flicked away by the person. behind his fringe, it was frozen, crystallised, icicles shot past his dark strands piercing you. “don’t bother. it’s nothing.”

eyebrows furrowed. “you’re insane,” you brushed the hair out of his face, finding splotches of bruising. his lip, busted red. injuries walked all over his skin, trampling the delicate layer. his complexion ghastly pale, you weren't sure if it was his skull peeking through his skin. “i need to call you an ambulan–”

“i’m serious,” he reiterated, “i… i just need a moment, some quiet. please. i don’t want them to find…” his sentence trailed off. 

you gulped, hands trembling. “you’re sure you don’t need me to call?”

he nodded.

he reassured you, but you can’t help but feel weighed by the fact that an injured person was right next to you. you made a mental note to ensure he visits a doctor by the end of this. sighing, you slowly sat next to him.

“... i’m just stressed. tired.” his words hung heavy in the blank air.

a familiar word. a sentiment that resonated. all too familiar. 

if there was a way to cheer him up... there was only one thing you knew about feeling burdened. you point a thumb at the boxing machine. “wanna blow off some of that stress?” 

.

“do you think that the arcade by the academy is still open?”

“i hope so. i wanna know if we’re still first on all those machines. and if my bloodstain still frightens people when they walk in,” a snicker. “remember when we played ’dancing dance rev rev’ for six hours straight? those were good days.”

you and wriothesley watch the boxing machine, your joint high scores blinking on the leaderboard in excited colours. 

“do you still have those old plushies i gave you from the claw machine?” you ask.

“of course,” wriothesley searches his pockets and pulls out his keys. a miniature wolf plush keychain hangs, bobbing up and down. “like this one. named it after you, how adorable they are.” he playfully pokes "mini you", cracking a grin.

you smile at the gesture. after all these years, you never forgot each other. “hey, no bullying.” you pause. “... weren’t we supposed to be tracking a suspect? i think they have already left this arcade.”

“oh, yeah. oops.”

a pair of fraternal twins stand outside outside a small agency, reading the sign over and over: teyvat's sleuth operatives… sounds tacky and lame... they think in unison. 

it is only when you approach them, that they stop hesitating. your uniform tidy, almost mastering the archetype of a professional private investigator, smiling at your newfound clients. you are no longer the new recruit. “need our help?”

a/n: i havent played genshin seriously since inazuma so i missed out on many events ( ; ω ; ) sorry alhaitham and wrio i tried my best⭐ lemme know if my reserach sucks bc my references were ace attorney and google (ﾉД`) also i wanted to draw their uniforms but got lazy, so i drew the banner instead (･ω<)☆ anw im off to read more manhwa (great start to the year), ill be back when the motivation finally whacks me hard again. if anyone wants to request ideas, feel free! my inbox is open 24/7! happy new year!!!! 🎆🎆🎆2025 will also be the year of the snake, so shoutout to all my snakes😎

[kandadze]

FoF rewatch ep 5: or, Sweet Dreams Are Made Of This (gifs and loose thoughts) ... part 3

Part 1

Part 2

Into another flashback we go:

Now ZYZ seems to consider Ran Yi to be a lesser demon, but the demon slaying spell (and Incense) used on him by the Chongwu camp didn't outright kill him. It did weaken him enough to make him need malicious energy to feed on - thus the killings started - but I still don't understand how he escaped in the first place... one of those things that don't get clearer even on a rewatch, I guess XD

(Have this beautiful beautiful shot instead:)

And another:

Then we get this very satisfying (at least to me) sequence of ZYZ once again going into someone's dream to get them to wake up. I love how different he is here as opposed to WX's nightmare.

Can this poor demon get some peace and quiet...

More pretty shots of WX and ZYC sleuthing together:

And now we're back to roasting the demon for being "bad" lol:

Have some demonic!ZYZ shots :)))

ZYC giving ZYZ the Look(TM):

What can I say, I have a soft spot for morally!ambiguous!ZYZ:

But of course, he did it alllll for Baize Token (no lies detected):

The funny thing is, they pretty much reached an understanding of sorts with Ran Yi, who was ready to turn himself in as long as Miss Qi got to be free - with the help of ZYZ's "conjure" spell:

But then Miss Qi shows up and says nothing matters as long as they're together and he changes his mind:

I love the flower detail on her sash btw, so pretty:

I've read some folks say that her "Whether you're a human or a demon, no matter what you do, we'll live and die together," was already LL talking indirectly to ZYZ, and I think that other than mimicking Miss Qi's phrasing and cadence rather perfectly (which okay, maybe LL could pull that off, considering he possessed ladies often), I don't think the "whether you're a human or a demon" part is something LL would ever say. He's very, you're a demon, don't pretend otherwise, any chance he gets... (also, ZYC's sword starts glowing in alert a little later, so. yeah.)

Anyhow, before everything dissolves into chaos again (here's the gifset I made for the ending sequence), have another shot of the pretty couple:

[rallamajoop]

On Donna (and Claudia) Beneviento

So, having spent the last couple of months absorbed in the world of RE: Village, somehow what’s really got my inner-canon-sleuth going this time is the issue of timelines. Just how long was Miranda posing as Mia before she was found out? Just how old are each of the Four Lords of the village? The game’s not telling us, but can I puzzle it out…

There are probably no ‘canonical’ answers to questions like this, at least in the sense of ‘answers the writers have agreed on and written down.’ Even putting aside all the usual complications of writing for games, RE: Village is a horror title structured around a gothic fairy tale: genres built on dream-logic and atmosphere. You may as well ask the ‘canonical’ backstory of Cinderella’s evil stepmother, or Dracula’s three ‘brides’: there isn’t one, because that’s not the point.

And yet, RE: Village provides just enough tantalising hints that I can’t resist the challenge of hunting answers that are, if not definitive, at least consistent with all the (limited) information we get. Which is how I wound up writing up this whole spiel about the four lords and who joined the family when (now up over here) – only to realise that the section on Donna Beneviento alone was getting so long it really needed its own post – so here we are.

Here's what stands out about Donna: Miranda has (very canonically) been experimenting on her villagers for a full century. Her daughter’s death in the Spanish Flu pandemic of 1919 is as explicit as anything in this game gets. The four lords and their household crests are presented like an institution that’s been around for generations (Do Not Ask why a small Romanian village needs as many as four lords. It’s a fairy tale, and that’s the wrong question).

And yet, Donna herself logically can’t have joined Miranda’s family any more recently than 1996 – a mere 24 years ago.

We know this, because it’s the year of death on Claudia Beneviento’s grave (1987-1996) – and that grave already existed when she was adopted by Mother Miranda. What little we know about Donna’s past comes from her gardener’s diary, and he talks about both in entries only days apart. There’s no year provided, but the dates are November 10-29. It could have been 1997, it could have been 2019 – but it’s a year I’m old enough to remember either way.

So did it really take Miranda that long to ‘complete’ her little family collection? Or could there have been a previous cadou-empowered Lord or Lady Beneviento? And should I be reading so much into a date on a gravestone, which for all I know should have read 1896, and which made it into the game by accident? I have no idea, but we're going with it anyway.

But wait: we have more dates! We never meet the gardener himself, but he’s given the name Josef Simon in the note he left on the Iuthier house in the village. And if he left that note in person, he must have been still living in the village as recently as 2017, because (and this is where it all gets deep into nerd-analysis territory), there’s a child’s drawing on the wall of Iuthier’s house dated to that year.

Why does this matter? Well, his last diary entry ominously ends with him taking an invitation to visit Donna’s house to see his ‘departed wife’. And that’s all the more ominous, considering the Duke’s statement that ‘none of her playmates have ever returned’ – not to mention, well, everything that happens to Ethan down there. The looming implication is that the gardener died soon after writing that last entry – meaning those entries were written after he’d shut up the Iuthier house, meaning that Donna only became her mould-empowered self as recently as 2017 (or even more recently still).

(God, do you see why this shit had got me so hard? It’s like solving one of those grid-based logic puzzles where if Mary is wearing a red hat and Adam wasn’t in the house on Thursday, which of the household could’ve been present at the time of the murder? This isn’t even supposed to be a detective game, GDI!)

But before we get too far down this particular rabbit hole, it’s worth remembering we don’t know for sure that the gardener died within days of Donna joining Miranda’s family. Or, to take a slightly darker angle, we don’t know for sure that the gardener who kept that diary was the same gardener who shut up the Iuthier house after 2017. Maybe ‘Josef Simon’ is a completely new gardener, who kept that old diary around to remind himself why he should absolutely never breathe too deeply over Claudia’s grave, or accept any of Mistress Donna’s invitations to come inside for tea…

Claudia Beneviento herself is a figure so mysterious that I’m a little suspicious her grave (let alone those bizarre dates) only exists at all due to some miscommunication between the writers and the environment asset team, or as a relic of a couple of very different stories getting awkwardly redacted into one at the nth hour (notes that came with the artwork say that her house was originally conceived as belonging to a doctor, the doll-theme only added later, which isn’t surprising). Taken at face value, a woman in mourning dress with a creepy doll obsession and a 9-year-old’s grave in her garden screams that Claudia was Donna’s daughter, whose tragic death she never recovered from. It fits with the greater themes of the game too: Miranda and Eva, Ethan and Rose, Donna and Claudia?

Only problem being that the gardener’s diary suggests that Donna's personal tragedy was something else altogether.

If the gardener is to be believed, Donna’s story is that of someone who shunned others from childhood due to ‘the scar over her eye’ (a birth defect?) choosing instead to talk to people only through the ventriloquist’s doll made for her father – then cut off from the world even further by her parents’ tragic deaths. (Notes on the artwork go further, suggesting that her parents committed suicide at the waterfall, but this never made it into the game.) Where does a dead 9-year-old girl come into that? Is she Donna’s sister, her cousin or aunt? It’s damn hard to find space for a daughter in the gardener’s account, but the fresh bouquets on the grave suggest she was at least someone important. It all feels like a story that’s been hastily patched together at the last minute (and very likely, it was).

Donna’s powers present a similar dichotomy: hallucinogenic plants and autonomous living dolls? The only common theme there is ‘spooky shit’. (God, it’s like Heisenberg and the lycans all over again!) I don’t mean any of this as a serious critique of the game or story: Donna’s house stays with people for a reason – horror’s often more effective because it’s incomprehensible – but Donna-the-character is a cypher.

Speaking of Donna's medical report, that confusing line about how she "divided her Cadou among her dolls in order to control them from a distance" is (inasmuch as I am qualified to translate it) a little clearer in the Japanese version. A more literal translation might be more along the lines of "has shared her own cadou with her favourite doll to control it from a distance" ‒ which certainly adds context to why it's Angie's remains you bring back to the Duke. What's in all those other dolls is open to question: more experimental cadou, or is them moving just another illusion? We'll never know for sure.

That's about it for hard info. Still, for what it’s worth, have some rampant speculation!

Suppose Donna and Claudia were sisters, Claudia the treasured ‘normal’ sister, to Donna’s disfigured recluse. Suppose Claudia died, and their grief over the loss of their one 'proper' daughter led Donna’s parents to throw themselves over the waterfall, leaving her all the more alone. Yeah. Just let that settle in for a moment.

Alternatively, suppose both of Donna’s parents (and perhaps even her ‘normal’ sister) lost their lives to Miranda’s quest to integrate all four noble houses into her own twisted family. The success rate for cadou experiments was notoriously low. Suppose she resorted to Donna last because her deformity made her that much less desirable – only for Donna to survive, to be ‘adopted’ by the very woman who murdered her whole family.

Now imagine Donna living under the shadow of inevitably being supplanted (yet again) when her new ‘mother’ manages to revive the true daughter she really wanted all along…

Now there are some horror stories for you.

As a side note, I’ve seen some articles claim Donna had a female family member called Bernadette who died in Miranda’s experiments. This isn’t based on much: the only evidence is a 21-year-old “Bernadette B” mentioned in one of Miranda’s case notes, shortly before the success story of “Alcina D”. Notably, “Alcina D” is recorded as being ‘of noble birth’, while “Bernadette B” is simply noted as ‘no occupation’, which doesn’t really support the idea the B stands for another important family. Being nearly as old as ‘Alcina D’, Bernadette would have lived and died generations before Donna and Claudia. So even if B does stand for Beneviento (and it probably doesn’t), it doesn’t add much to Donna’s story.

And on a final note, did anyone else notice that of all the four lords, Donna is the only one who gets called by her first name? Like, Heisenberg is ‘Heisenberg’ even to his mother, brother and sister. I don’t think anyone but the Duke ever says Dimitrescu’s name aloud (let alone calls her ‘Alcina’). But Heisenberg mentions his other two siblings twice, and both times they’re Donna and Moreau. Not Beneviento and Moreau, or Donna and Salvatore: Donna and Moreau.

Now, maybe he’s just lazy (Beneviento is a bit of a mouthful), but while everyone else in the Duke’s spiel is called by their last name, Donna gets to be Donna Beneviento. Naturally, she’s ‘Mistress Donna’ to her gardener too. Possibly Angie is part of the reason ‒ logically, she's a Beneviento too, and we need some way to distinguish the two of them ‒ but it certainly speaks to how she's thought about, by family and by the writers.

No other first name is spoken aloud at all, AFAIK – you have to find Miranda’s experiment reports at the very end of the game to learn Moreau and Heisenberg’s first names (‘Alcina’ is at least written on her diary as well, much earlier on, as well as in Miranda’s separate case notes on experiment 181).

I doubt there’s much significance behind this detail, but it does kind of back up the idea that Donna may be the baby of the family – the youngest in years and the youngest when she was turned. And somehow still the most mysterious, for all that we arguably have more information about her past than any of the other three.

Please don’t take that as suggesting she’s just an innocent little baby, though. There’s a tendency in fandom to portray her as perfectly talkative and functional with the right audience (never mind that she speaks only a few words in the whole game, and canonically preferred to ‘talk’ through her Angie even to the gardener who’d known her since childhood, and who clearly cared for her deeply). Her backstory is tragic as fuck however you fill in the blanks, but all those fucked up murder dolls didn’t come from nowhere.

It's probably a mistake to treat Angie as a separate entity at all, when she's functionally Donna's own alter ego: very plausibly her way of acting out her own childhood trauma, from which she never recovered or matured. And trauma exorcised into a new vessel isn’t trauma that’s gone away.

[thewertsearch]

Ask Comp 13/4 - 2

Yup! The Alpha timeline offers a novel solution to the problem of Sylladex capacity. If the Captcha index only needs to be consistent in the Alpha timeline, then it doesn't have to worry about reserving index space for every possible item.

If this is how things work, then the Sylladex isn't predestined, per se - it's enforced. Everyone has a finite set of objects that they're allowed to captchalogue, and if you pick up anything else, your index is invalidated - and your timeline is pruned.

You could still call it predestination, if you were so inclined, but that's only partially accurate. It's more that you're coerced into 'choosing' one particular destination - or else.

I'm loving these voice headcanons. Scratch as Emperor Belos is inspired.

What the hell? That's amazing.

Based on my (admittedly limited) experience with web administration, it's not all that surprising, either. Hacks like this are shockingly common.

No worries! The vast majority of followers don't actually interact with these posts' notes, but I still assume they're reading them. Just a quirk of Tumblr's norms.

My best guess is that the drones would arrive when the troll is on the cusp of adulthood, shortly before they leave Alternia. That would give them as much time as possible to form potent relationships - which would, in turn, give the Empire the most potent wrigglers.

I still think it would motivate younger trolls, though. I mean, if all single people are executed at eighteen, you might feel a little pressure to enter the dating game early.

Never forget the Der-sayer incident.

Rereading it, Karkat scans as sad, angry, resigned, confused, lonely, and trying to bottle up an avalanche of "FRESH RAGE."

I think we're both half right, here - he's drowning in a tide of pretty much every negative emotion imaginable.

Thank you!! We triple-checked, and it seems like Tumblr ate the first half of this ask :(

Much appreciated, though!! I love that metaphor for coming up with scattershot theories.

Oh, that makes sense. Can't believe I missed a Hussie pun, but that one was a little harder to notice.

This makes it sound like the universe is tethering her to life, just as she tethers it. What is up with this lady?

That's true! I'm pretty sure it's both.

I'd always imagined Equius as being pretty tall. They're all the same height in sprite art though, so I think it's another case of sprite art being non-representative.

I'm withholding judgement on the Meowrails until we get more interactions between them. Their early conversations were a little worrying, but it's possible that Hussie hadn't fully fleshed out the concept of Moirallegiance at the time. We'll see how they interact now that how their quadrant works has been expanded on.

[ Problem sleuth is still hosted there😁- C ]

It still seems to work for me!

Oh, fun! I guess John's birthday does sort of fall into a half-pattern with the others.

Still, it would have made more sense for him to be in a line with the other Players - his Chumhandle doesn't match theirs, either, so maybe John's just a weird case.

Thank you! I feel like this sort of analysis can only really be applied to fictional characters, though. Everything a character says or does is the result of a deliberate choice made by a writer, and I can use my knowledge of that fact to frame my analysis.

In real life, though, people just say shit - often for no reason, or for reasons they don't understand themselves. People are a lot more complicated than even the most well-written character, and understanding them requires a whole different skillset!

Someone also posted Hussie's author comment about this. It's been years since I watched the movie - and if I recall correctly, it was also pretty meta itself. Maybe I need to watch it again, as reading material for Homestuck.

ferretlady97 submitted: talking about the book commentary reminded me of something i was gonna send you when the troll black queen took off her ring but forgot "Note that when she takes the ring off six orbs are filled. Three players from the blue team have entered the session, and three from the red team. Aradia was the second of the blue team to enter. Nepeta was third. Aradia's entry is when the frog mutations took effect on the ring-wearer. And then an interval passed before Nepeta's entry. Which means the queen actually spent a decent amount of time looking like a frog, deliberating whether or not she could put up with this for an entire game session. Ultimately, she couldn't hang in there. But this does imply she at least tried." i just think it's funny thanks for your time

The language used here - the fact that she couldn't 'put up' with her transformation into a frog, and couldn't 'hang in there' - seems to imply that doing so harms her in some way.

All the frog symbolism is still a closed book to me. What exactly does Bilious Slick represent or symbolize that Derse hates so much?

[ you got another ask about LOLCAT but it has classpect spoilers so I'm saving it for later - C ]

I suppose that could work - but then again, it seems that 25% of all Lands have some association with water, so it can't always represent Life. I do want to come back to this later, though, when the Classes and Aspects are better defined.

Send away! It'll be a while until I use them, though.

I appreciate it! That's a minimum bound that I'd have to pick up the pace to reach, at this point.

Hey, what can I say? I'm here for a good time, and a long time. >:)

I keep forgetting that LOSS is a references to a fanfic. I associate it more with you, the LOSS Anon!

If she can't, she's definitely phrasing things in a misleading way, trying to imply that she can. The Tavros scene is arguable, but I really can't think of any other way to interpret how she talks about the Consorts, unless she's straight up lying - and she really doesn't do that much.

Vriska 100%s the game, but skips all the cutscenes?

...yeah, I can see it. Every side quest is another chance to win!!!!!!!! >::::)

[witchyfoxelf]

gencon 2024 after action report, part 2: day 2 (friday)

previously on gencon con report.

i had a pretty light day on friday in terms of scheduled events, which i think is something i'll try to do differently if i (hopefully) go back next year. grammy had a gm shift that started basically immediately, and mommy had a game in the afternoon that i wasn't part of, but vi had a couple hours before we parted ways so we decided to spend a couple hours at the boardgamegeek hot games room.

the hot games room is basically a large room with tables for folks to play at and a library of popular new release board games. i think the games were in alphabetical order, i say "think" because literally right at the beginning of the line was a copy of arcs, and we really didn't need to look at any of the other games once we saw that they had it considering the rave reviews it's been getting.

after getting a chance to play it, it's incredibly easy to see why it's been such a critical success. arcs is a game about space colonization and conflict with plenty of optionality in how you approach it. there's a lot of unsurprising mechanics like resource management and earning victory points, and of course rolling dice to resolve space conflict, but also some slightly more unexpected ones like a light trick-taking aspect to resolving actions on each turn.

above all, it's complicated & multifaceted without being intimidating. we were able to pick up the rules in no time, and once we did gameplay was smooth & exciting. this also feels like a game with a ton of replay value, and that's just the base game. there's also a campaign expansion that i'd love to try somewhere down the line when the game is more widely available. (the lgs i work at had it in stock for a minute because we backed the kickstarter, but it sold out basically immediately. again, after playing it it's really not difficult to see why.)

after this there was a rather long gap in my schedule that i made the somewhat ill-advised choice of trying to fill by looking for mtg singles in the vendor hall. it didn't take long for the sensory overload to get to me, and to make matters worse i was basically in the middle of the huge hall and literally couldn't find the exit for a good 30 minutes or so.

when i did finally make it out, i made a beeline for the quiet room, but when i got there it was literally full. if i have one piece of feedback for the event, they REALLY need more than one quiet room. finding literally no respite after that vendor hall honestly kind of broke me and i ended up in pretty rough shape, just kind of wandering aimlessly through moving crowds of people until i finally found a relatively quiet corner of one of the satellite hotels to just kind of collapse in for a while. and honestly if there had just been another quiet room this would have been easily avoidable.

anyway, after a while to recover i met back up with grammy & cj, waited for mommy to finish vir game, and we all got some food before heading to our second game with all four of us together, brindlewood bay.

brindlewood bay is for sure in contention for my favorite rpg we played at the con, though it's difficult to compare to my other favorite for reasons that will become clear when we get to it in the next post. brindlewood bay is a pbta cozy mystery rpg that is something of a marriage between what i imagine golden girls is like (i've never watched it) and murder she wrote. basically, you're a team of old lady sleuths who need to solve various crimes while also gradually learning about some larger eldritch threat lurking in the shadows. (we didn't get too far on that track, it feels like that's more for a longer campaign than on your first sitting.)

during character creation you pick a sort of detective superpower (mine, which i sadly didn't end up using, was encyclopedia brown's ability to use one piece of real-world trivia to help solve the mystery), an overall style (i picked hippy-dippie; see! told you it would come up later), and a "cozy activity" (i picked gardening, because i think that's the old lady activity i'm the most likely to develop later in life). after you pick all your traits and the few stats you need to fill in, you go around the table and suggest some resources for each other to have access to. one of the other players had cooking as their "cozy activity," so the party gifted that player an herb garden, and they gifted my character an "herb" garden since her hippy-dippy style felt at least a bit weed-coded.

another thing that came up rather organically is that my character & mommy's ended up being the "and so, they were roommates!" brand of lesbians, and the entire table including the gm seemed to get a big kick out of that.

this was my first experience with pbta, so i don't have much to compare it to, but i wouldn't be shocked if a lot of these games more or less come down to "if you/your playgroup like the premise/vibe you'll enjoy it," and i really think gencon helped "break the seal" on these sorts of games for me, and i'm hoping that'll translate into me being a bit more adventurous about trying more games instead of just watching the pile of games we own but haven't played get bigger & bigger.

but yeah, that was a wrap on day 2! only two games, but definitely a case of quality over quantity, so no complaints here.

[kiraixi]

Secret GirlBoyfriend?

Wednesday 29th March ✩ NSFW:  “Caught in the Act” (Flip-Reverse) @harringrove-flip-reverse-it

ao3

“Okay, bye Steve!” 

Steve looks skeptical, “Are you sure Dustin? I don’t want any calls from the neighbours.” 

He puts on a slight frown, this plan needs to work. 

“We’re nearly fourteen, dude. A couple hours alone won’t kill us”

Steve mutters back, “Of course you’d say that.” Dustin grins,

“I’ll be two hours max.” He walks backwards glaring, “So don’t do anything stupid okay?”

Dustin salutes him off, “Aye captain!”

As soon the car starts, he dashes into the living room.

“He’s gone, we’re free to search!”

The party gets up. Well, minus the girls.

Max has been huffy since morning and El seems too engrossed in the movie to care.

Whatever, they don’t care as much as he does. But Dustin is Steve’s right hand man, said he was cool and everything!

This one secret he’s kept to his chest just means that Dustin needs to sleuth around and find out. Steve would never keep something from his best friend, right?

For the past two months Steve Harrington has been going steady with a secret girlfriend. He’s been so tight-lipped about it that the only hint Dustins’ been able to wrangle out of is that the lady’s a blonde.

He found bleached hairs in the passenger seat of Steve’s car. Only he has the privilege of a shotgun, so of course those strands must belong to the special someone.

Dustin’s definitely not jealous or resentful, nope not one bit.

Taking the stairs two at a time he pulls out a notebook, ready to jot down any discrepancies in the house.

The best room to check is Steve’s. Mike follows him inside while Lucas and Will check the other rooms for clues.

The room is messy, it seems like the laundry hasn’t been done in awhile. Dustin yanks open the closest draw and starts to rummage while Mike searches the desk.

He’s the one to break the silence of moving objects,

“Are you sure we should be looking?” Kicks over a gray sweatshirt, “I don’t wanna see anything– weird”

Dustin turns around pulling a crop top from the bottom more aggressively than he should. The whole drawer shakes.

It has a ‘LIFEGUARD’ emblem on the front. He waves it like a celebration flag. Totally not Steve’s style therefore,

“Look! This is definitely hers!” 

Mike gives him a look, “It’s a bit creepy you're so obsessed with this..”

He huffs, throwing the garment on the floor and notes down the item.

‘Lifeguard’

“If you’re too much of a coward to look then fine! I’m just being a good wingman checking if some random girl is good enough for Steve Harrington.”

“Whatever man, I’m just gonna go downstairs,” He walks towards the door. “Look under the bed, my sister loves to keep her secret stash of things there”

He salutes him off, “Thanks for the tip!”

Once Mike is well downstairs Dustin drops to his knees getting ready to crawl under, he spots a few things. A cardboard box and a piece of blue fabric?

He slides the box out first, then tries to reach for the cloth pulling it out to see better.

But as soon as he realises what it is Dustin gives a girlish screech that he will forever deny. 

It's a freaking thong. Ew!

Lucas and Will come running from the passageway, once they spot the offending item Lucas starts laughing while Will looks slightly uncomfortable.

“Dude! What did you think you’d find under someone's bed?”

He tries to hide his embarrassment, “Shut up man, just tell me what you two found.” Kicking the lace back under the bed he sits down.

Will speaks first, “Well in the bathroom there was a feather earring, creams–” 

“And some rings,” Lucas adds. “But they were really big..”

He frowns, “Okay?”

“Yeah, maybe Steve started wearing them?” Will replies.

He puts it on the list but crosses it out after, Dustin’s never seen Steve wear any rings before, Lucas is probably exaggerating the size..

Lucas looks at the box with a question on his face, “Where did you find that?”

Dustin motions both to sit next down and explains Mike's idea of looking under the bed.

 “I’m pretty sure opening its’ gonna be another jumpscare Dustin,” 

He huffs, of course Will is the voice of reason.

To be on the safe side he shakes the box before opening, it rattles. Multiple small objects. He lifts the lid no longer scared.

A bunch of makeup. Boring. 

There’s a collection of jewellery, mostly silver.

‘Wears silver’

There’s a piece of yellow sticky note poking out from the bottom, he tugs on it and frowns, showing it to the others.

In red ink there’s Steve’s signature chicken scratches, but underneath is response in an odd shade of blue, faded and smudged. Either low quality or almost running out as the ink skips a bit. It’s smaller than Steve’s but comically much sharper in comparison.

The red reads ‘Bluebird ’ with a sad imitation of what he assumes is a bird, while the biro responds ‘Idiot’ with a better looking heart.

“I recognise the pen!” Will exclaims

Dustin snorts while Lucas raises his eyebrows incredulously.

“You recognise the pen from its ink??”

Will nods, “Where my mum works, those are the pen’s that are normally on display to test in the stationary section.” He points to the writing. “I’m normally stuck with those if I forget my pencil case at home.”

Lucas butts in “So what does that mean? Steve’s girlfriend is a pen thief?”

He chews his thumbnail thinking over this new information, “No, this person shops at Meldav’s which means…”

Dustin looks up at the others, Meldav’s isn’t known for its quality. Most people would rather head to the Mall to buy something like stationary. He writes down.

‘Poor?’

They hear running up the stairs, Dustin slams the lid on the container and shoves it under the bed.

Mike opens the door and all three of them visibly deflate.

“My mum’s here to pick us up” He looks at Lucas “ She said she can drop you off as well.”

The two get up leaving Dustin to trail behind. He’s the only one being babysat tonight since his Mom’s out of town for the weekend.

The group gets ready to leave, he swivels his head around realising Max isn't here. 

El looks up from tying her shoelaces, “She wanted to skate home before it gets dark.”

He shrugs looking at the clock above the door, guess it's gonna be himself for the next half hour.

The others wave him off, Dustin decides to make a hot chocolate and laze on the fancy couch while he waits.

Sifting through the kitchen he finds a questionable amount of sweet food. Half finished bags of lollipops, soda, chocolate all seem to be piled into one draw. 

A bit weird since Steve always turns down any offers of candy that Dustin has on hand. Says he’s ‘building his figure’. He writes it down.

‘Sweet tooth’

Afterwards Dustin crashes on the sofa, drink in hand. It’s getting dark outside and once pulling a big cushion over himself, he’s dozing off to the hum of soap operas.

                                 ~

“He’s asleep, don’t worry babe..”

Dustin awakes to the quiet giggling and whispers of Steve and someone else.

It takes a few seconds for him to register but once he does Dustin stiffens in realisation. It's them!  

Peaking over the couch will solve the mystery that’s been bugging him for months.

Slowly edging upwards, a smile pulls his lips. He’s finally caught them.

The secret girlfriend that's been hoarding so much of his best friends' time, Pride and relief swell in his gut.

He lifts his head.

A few things happen at once.

Dustin makes eye contact with a mop of blonde hair, but his eye’s fly open in horror once he realises exactly which blonde it is. 

Billy fucking Hargrove.

Billy yells shoving Steve, who was previously whispering in his ear, away and points at Dustin. 

“I FUCKING told you this was a bad idea!

Steve whips around spotting Dustin and smiles sheepishly.

Dustin just stares, eyes darting between the two. He’s lost for words really.

“So this is the secret girlfriend you’ve been hiding?”

The blonde turns so suddenly Dustin’s surprised he’s not snapped his neck. Billy yanks Steve forward by the collar.

“Secret Girlfriend…?”

Steve fumbles around, arms flailing and out of breath.

“I– I can explain!”

Billy grapples with Steve in what Dustin assumes is a headlock while he slides stealthily back down the couch.

“You going behind my back pretty boy?”

“This is all a misunderstanding I swear!”

Their wrestling dissolves into laughter, seemingly forgetting his presence.

Maybe Dustin will leave this a mystery unsolved.

Hope y'all enjoyed! It’s just turned his birthday where I am so enjoy early!

[beantothemax]

Erk was sitting in their room reading a magic tome, as she often does, this was a new spell Lord Pent had gotten for them, a more advanced fire spell he had said. 

But while Erk usually loves learning new magic, especially when it came to advanced anima magic, this time they had trouble focusing on the words, her mind was instead filled with thoughts of her dear Priscilla. It had been like this ever since they returned from the Dread Isle, they simply could not stop thinking about her sweet smile that she would always send Erks way, her soft and calm voice that had the ability to always calm Erk down, her beautiful eyes that Erk often found themselves lost in, her-

[Knock knock] “Erk? Are you in there?”

It was Lord Pent

“I am, what do you need of me?”

“May I come in? I have an offer for you” It was not unusual for Lord Pent to offer Erk things, he often gifted Erk with various items such as a new tome, or a nice dress he and Louise had found on a trip to the capital. But still, Erk had no idea what it could be this time. “You may come in.”

“Fantastic, right so, me and Louise were thinking, and we realized it had been a long time since we really had a proper vacation, what with all the chaos surrounding Nergal and all that, and we decided that we are going on a trip to the northern shore, they have wonderful beaches there,” Erk could already see where this is going “and we were wondering if you might like to join us on this trip” 

Erk saw this coming a mile away, she always does “I would love to, but I do not wish to get in the way of you and Louise's vacation”

“Oh hush, you deserve, and need, this trip as much as we do, and it has been so very long since you went on a trip with us” Erk knew they could not convince him to leave Erk home, and in truth, Erk knew she definitely needed the off time. “Oh fine, I can agree that some time on the beach could be good for me”

“Oh I know, you should invite your girlfriend to come along with you!” Louise had shown up behind Pent.

“I- what?!” How did she know about that?

“Oh that’s a great idea honey”

“Now hold on just a second-” how did they know about that!?

“Oh sweetie, don’t tell me you think we didn’t knew about that” Erk did not think they knew about that

“Wait wait wait, but how do you know about it?” Erk was embarrassed that they had known, this for an apparent while.

“Oh Erk, you are a brilliant young lady, but you are truly terrible at keeping a secret. It's the way you look at her” “The way you’ve clearly lost your focus on studying” “The way your eyes light up when you mention her name” “Not to mention the fact that you spend half your days over at Count Carleons manse. Frankly it was quite obvious" "Not that that is a problem of course, she seems like a very sweet young lady”

“Alright I get it… well… how long have you known?” Erk had accepted her defeat at the sleuthing power of Lord Pent and Lady Louise.

“Oh for a long while, ever since we were at the shrine of seals really”

“WHAT” Erk had not realized they even had room for a larger defeat.

“Oh please don’t be embarrassed Erk, we all have weak points, yours just happens to be hiding secrets, not that I can fathom why you hid this from us, but that is for you to tell us when and if you wish, now, do you want to bring her with us on vacation”

“...yes”

HHHHH…………./ GAIIH……. YURIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII collapses into a heap

CRAB FIC REAL… I am slurping this uo like a plate of sphagetti crab this is quite excellent

REALLY enjoyed this sentence in particular. they did not in fact know…..

I am injecting the erk directly into my veins as we speak. this will be excellent fuel for the ercilla writing I am cooking up. be prepared

[jimintomystery]

Foodfight! (ugh)

I voted for Dex Dogtective in a poll the other day and it reminded me that I never actually watched that shitty Foodfight! movie from 2012. So I did. This was not a good idea.

There isn't a whole lot to say about Foodfight! that hasn't already been said. The project was in development hell for so long that it defaulted on its debt, and investors took over to at least get something out the door. The most obvious issue is the bad animation, though that speaks for itself.

But here's the thing: This movie could've had Pixar-quality animation and it'd still be hot garbage. "What if mascots for popular products lived in your local store?" is a middling idea at best, and the story mishandles it every step of the way.

It would be easy to say this movie needed a lot of popular corporate mascots to really work, and the best they could do was Charlie the Tuna and the Vlasic stork. But I remember thinking the first Toy Story wouldn't work without heavy hitters like Barbie and Lego, and yet they got along fine with just Mr. Potato Head and Etch-a-Sketch. Similarly, Wreck-It Ralph succeeded with a cast of skillful pastiches of familiar video game characters, and mere cameos by the big names. In theory Foodfight! could make up a cereal mascot that reminds you of Tony the Tiger while leaving room for changes to fit the plot. But in execution we get...Dex Dogtective.

Dex is the mascot for Cinnamon Sleuth cereal, and also a detective, and also a dog, and also he dresses like Indiana Jones, and also he likes raisins, and also he runs a nightclub like Rick Blaine in Casablanca. So he has like six different gimmicks, and the cereal mascot part is easily the least important. The only reason you'd even suspect Dex is a character from a box of cereal is because he's in a movie about brand mascots. Indeed, none of the characters created for this movie look like they were designed to sell anything, least of all groceries.

The strongest concept in the movie (which isn't saying much) is that the brands are facing an invasion by the evil Brand X. This makes sense, seeing as Brand X is by definition generic, with no iconic mascot except the pejorative and mysterious implications of that term. Listen, I know this sounds dumb, but you could do something with this. In a world of where brands come to life in the form of their mascots, who or what emerges from a brand without a mascot? How would such a being differ from the likes of, say, Count Chocula? Such a character might reject some fundamental principle that the good guys hold dear.

At this juncture, a sharper "secret lives of things that aren't alive" movie could make some insightful point that ties the story together. Something about how the world needs brand mascots, I suppose. But nobody actually needs brand mascots, for pete's sake, except for the people who came up with this movie. So there's no core idea for Brand X to oppose--the good guys' world exists just to exist, so the bad guys exist just to destroy it. With that baseline laziness established, Brand X paradoxically has lots of mascots, all of whom look like Nazis for some reason.

Well, okay, technically Brand X's leader, Lady X, looks less like a Nazi and more like the Baroness from Cobra. But it figures that she doesn't quite fit in with the rest, since she created Brand X! Yeah, so at the end it's revealed she was a mascot for a poorly-marketed brand of prunes, and when she was discontinued she went to Brazil (???) for plastic surgery (???) to make her all hot. Then she somehow amassed the resources in the real world to create Brand X, complete with a human-sized android (!!!) so she could pass herself off as a real person and sell her wares to stores.

Dex is astonished by this backstory, since the mascots are like three inches tall and can't even leave the store. Lady X explains the plot hole by saying "Humans! When you look like this you can get them to do anything. Size only counts for men."

"Size only counts for men."

"Size only counts for men."

(She's talking about fucking.)

(fucking)

(-ucking -ucking -king)

Anyway, I need a nap now. Please don't watch this movie.

[ndfan3]

Nancy’s AI Adventure, Part 10

“Come on gentleman, in you go.” said George. She and the waitress supervised the procession of the four sullen and bound men into the manager’s office where they were seated, gagged by the two young women as a precaution against plotting, and then locked up. Meanwhile Nancy, Bess and the remaining staff apologised profusely to the diners, explaining that the police woukd soon be here and that restaurant was closing for the night. “Well, that’s that, then.” sighed Bess wearily. “We captured the whole gang!” Nancy nodded. “You call the police, Bess.” she told her friend. “I would like one last word with Monsieur Dupont.”

The girl sleuth descended the stair to the wine cellar which she entered cautiously. She need not have worried. The restauranteur was still seated, tied up where George had left him after she had hurried away to prevent the cook’s escape. “Have you returned to tell me of your triumph, Miss Drew?” The Frenchman asked the young woman ironically, moving a little uncomfortably in his bonds. “Well your chums are all tied up and locked in your office, waiting for the police to arrive if that’s what you mean.” she replied. Dupont smiled ruefully. “A remarkable young woman.” he said softly. Nancy looked hard at her prisoner. “What made you do it, monsieur?” she asked him. “Turn a local thriving business into the centre of a drugs ring in a town like River Heights?” Dupont stared back at the detective then indicated the racks and racks of high end wine that surrounded them with his head. “How much do you think it cost to set this restaurant up as an exclusive online wine merchant?” he asked her. The young woman shook her head. “Debt, Miss Drew.” Dupont continued. “Eventually you turn to less scrupulous bodies when the banks will no longer loan you the money. And that is how the cartel gets its claws into you.” Dupont bowed his head as the sound of aporoaching police sirens drifted down from upstairs.

Nancy and Bess later met with Sheriff Jane Jessop outside the restaurant after M Dupont and his accomplices had been carted away in handcuffs. “You girls did well,” the policewoman smiled, “ to have turned the tables on the gang the way you did. Luckily for you they were not gang members - just employees who got greedy.” Nancy smiled in acknowledgment. “What will happen to M Dupont?” she asked Officer Jessop. “He will receive at least ten years.” Jane replied. “His team perhaps half of that - depending on what evidence we uncover now and what they tell us. Dupont helped himself by surrendering to you when he did, Miss Drew. “And the cartel?” ventured Bess. “Gone from River Heights, Miss Marvin.” replied the woman. “Something else we have to thank you ladies for.”

Two months later, Bess, George and Nancy sat in the newly opened Pierre’s restaurant. It was the former Chez Dupont, with most of the innocent staff re-employed under new management. The girls had just enjoyed a complementary meal. “It’s nice to eat here and not be investigating!” laughed Bess as she sipped a black coffee. “What next, Nance?” asked George expectantly. “How do you two fancy a holiday on my uncle’s beach house in Florida?” the titian-haired girl detective suddenly asked. “I think we deserve it, don’t you?”

THE END.

AI images created via Microsoft Bing before its upgrade and AI Fantasy

[nvrcmplt]

One of the few perks of about being a private investigator was access to information, and a face went a long enough way for Jeanne as she had been forced ( by her assistant ) to issue an apology to the poor woman who had gotten caught up in her previous ordeal. Delivered in her mailbox was a letter, handwritten and signed J.B. The letter, when read would read the following:

I hope our first meeting gave you a good first impression (she has crossed out good ). My assistant, upon his return, urged me to send an apology for the problems that may have occurred and he hopes you won't sue him (I for one can handle a lawsuit). I do wish to apologize and make up for the conversation we couldn't have. Coffee is on me. You will find at the Cafe listed down below.

P.S before you wonder how I found your address, I'm a private investigator (and you left your wallet).

Tucked withing the mailbox were the wallet.

No tricks this time, just good old coincidence (for she could have done enough sleuthing with just her face). For the poor woman who got wrapped up with Jeanne the other day !

The loss of a wallet was a shame, she liked the print of leather in that one. Plus it was her 40th present from Eijun, so when she returned home that evening to find herself with mail and a gift inside - the very item she's been mourning the loss of. She felt her heart skip a beat at holding the leather to her chest again. Cards all inside, discounts and number cards, a photo of herself and said brother in animal ear filters when they were way younger than their current times.

She didn't hesitate to open up the letter that it seemingly came with and with a laugh, she moved herself to the kitchenette to read it as she placed her bag aside and washed her hands from the outside germs and took down her hair with a relieved hum and itch. "Coffee, huh?" It wasn't the best time for caffeine, but to be honest - she did need to have her patient looked at from a hunch in her core. A bad idea really but she wasn't a fool, she knew her legal rights outside and inside her business.

Sighing as she gathered her wallet to place into her bag once more, she moved to the bedroom to change her blouse and reapply perfumes with adjusting the minimal make-up worn. Leaving her hair down as the ache to her scalp was already irritating her, she took a moment to step aside and change her wedges for flats. Just a hunch, just in case… It was crazy to think about really. She knew PI's had the drama on TV about being hated for their work but to be a part of that?

At that crazy height too?

Well, at least she got to sleep well that night, stuck with the smell of Jeanne's clothes on her own. The heat of her skin, the shear strength in both body and mind she expelled in the moment of worthy of screaming if one was not calmed enough. Ji Ae couldn't help herself in thinking back to it either, they were practically slotted to each other to hide, instead of merely asking how much it'll cost to get proof upon a possible domestic abuse situation - she was instead in an action movie with a beautiful woman as a guardian.

Checking her phone for the first time, she took off again to the front door. Scooping up the letter, her keys and headed back outside to go meet up with the lady in waiting. She couldn't say she wasn't bursting with questions - since she was pretty much ushered home after climbing back inside.

"Just a cup then." She told herself, adjusting her bag's strap and climbing into her car once more to head for the address on the note.

[salty-dracon]

"There's a stan account." I tried to stifle my disgust-filled laughter while I scrolled through the Twitter page with Discord open in another tab. "There's a Red Slasher stan account."

The howling laughter of my friends poured through my headphones. We were on a Discord call. One of them, Janet, was an adept Internet sleuth, and when I told her my dad was a former supervillain, she asked for enough information to figure out who it was. I gave whatever information I knew- that he'd stopped about 20 years ago, that he didn't have any superpowers besides a really good sense of smell, that he mainly went after violent criminals- and within an hour she had a name.

Naturally, I was terrified to Google it, but this same friend said she'd give me $30 to do it. And I wasn't the kind of person who turns down a free $30.

"There's an old fancam with old pictures of my dad set to fuckin' Katy Perry." I continued. I watched the video again and again- flashing and edited pictures of my dad- his same face, just younger- surrounded by heart and flower and skull emojis.

"Send me the fancam!" Janet shouted. "Please! I need to see it!"

"No!" I shouted back. "I'm dying of cringe over here! My dad is out here cosplaying a fucking- what is this? Kory, what was the name of that one character from Baldur's Gate 3-"

"Astarion?" Kory asked.

"No. The girl."

"Lae'zel?"

"The other one."

"Shadowheart?"

"Look at this!" I sent a screenshot in the chat. It showed a younger version of my dad wearing skintight black pants and a corset-like tank top that showed off well-toned muscles and pectorals. He was holding a long, thin knife up to the camera.

"He's posing like Lady Gaga. I can't get over this." Kory's deep voice reverberates through my ears. "So, like, is your dad single?"

"No! He's married!" I cover my face. "He's like, 50 now, dude. The age gap is way too strong, man. Like, he does not look this strong anymore."

"Okay well, do you look like-"

"No, I look like my mom. Sorry." I laughed. "The stan account doesn't mention anything about why he quit supervillain stuff."

"Was it because he got married?" Janet asked. "Your dad's a killer. Maybe he wanted to stop."

"Killer?" I repeated to her.

"Yeah, on Wikipedia it says he's credited with killing over 60 people. Just walking up to them in the middle of the street and kidnapping them, then leaving their stabbed bodies for the police to find. It's because he kept posting pictures online of him with his victims that they got these pictures."

"He's 50, right?" Kory's voice sounded jovial. "That's like, one person for every year he's lived. That's crazy, man. That's a lot of people." I heard him laugh again. "It's okay. I can fix him."

A peal of laughter ripped from Janet at that remark- I only heard a few seconds of her laughter before I hit the Disconnect button and took off my headphones.

My dad's a killer. That horrible thought rippled over me like grimy water, tainting me and turning me into one with the muck and smelly rot. What led my dad to be a killer? To kill random people? If that's what my dad is, then what does that make me? What will that make me if I spend any more time around him?

Before I knew it, I started stuffing my clothes into a duffel bag. Then, my documents. My wallet. My laptop. My water bottle. My secret money stash. My cell phone charger.

I have to get out. I have to get out. I have to get out or I'll become a killer like him. Those thoughts pounded through my head uncontrollably, forcing me to stuff the bag more and more and more... before I suddenly bolted out of the house with my duffel bag on my back.

The moment I stepped outside, I felt the cold of night and the fog on my skin. The fog was so thick, I could only see dim glowing where streetlamps were supposed to be.

There was no way I could run away in that kind of weather. Unless I thought of something, I'd need to stay outside until the fog cleared up.

Then, I heard the door open behind me. My dad was standing there, surprised to see me.

"Is everything okay?" He glanced down at me and my pajamas. "Where are you going? Come back inside."

Killer.

I couldn't even muster words. I just shook my head.

"Come on. What are you doing?" he asked. "Are you okay?"

Killer.

I shook my head again.

He sighed. "Can I sit with you, at least?"

Killer.

"Just drop the bag. I promise I won't take it." He motioned for me to drop the bag next to me. That, at least, was a compromise I was willing to make. Because at the very least I could pick it up and run away from him.

He sat down on the steps and faced me. I couldn't see the tension on his face, but I could feel it in his heart. It's not like you to run away in the middle of the night. Something is wrong, but I don't know what.

"What is it?" he asked, his silhouette shifting in the thick fog. "Why are you trying to run away?"

I shook my head. "I just wanna be alone for a bit."

He paused. "Spider in your room again? Someone being mean to you online?" He took a deep breath. "Did... you see something bad?" He twisted his head side to side. "It's that last one. I can tell by the way your scent changed."

Scent. Because you can smell them. Because you smell the people you're about to kill.

"Woah, calm down!" His voice rose into a panic. "What's wrong? What did you see?"

"Dad," I asked, "did you really kill people?"

His expression grew downcast, before he says, "Yes, I did."

"Why?" I asked. "Did it have to do with their scent? Because you could smell their fear?"

"No, not their fear." He shook his head. "It wasn't fear. It was hate. But that's no excuse, right?" I watched him bury his head in his hands. "I still killed all of those people. Because I thought they deserved it. And then, when I began craving attention, people gave it to me because I was a hero to them." He suddenly stood up. "Your mom doesn't know either. And when you were born, I hoped you wouldn't have my sense of smell. I was so, so happy when you were born normal like your mother-"

"Get away from me!" I shouted. I grabbed the bag next to me and ran away into the fog, away from him.

So much thick, dark fog. I could barely find my way. Before I knew it, I'd run into the woods, and I just kept running, ignoring the branches hitting my face.

I could hear him shouting my name, desperation in his voice. But after a while, it stopped. But I kept running and running and running, because my heart and mind would not let me stop.

I was too afraid to consider stopping to listen to his tale.

I was just too afraid...

You always knew you dad used to be a villain, but you really weren’t expecting what you saw when you googled his villain persona.

[dollycas]

Special Guest - Abigail Keam - Author of Murder Under A Cold Moon: A 1930s Mona Moon Historical Cozy Mystery #GuestPost / #Giveaway - Great Escape Book Tour @abigailkeamauthor

Murder Under A Cold Moon: A 1930s Mona Moon Historical Cozy Mystery by Abigail Keam MONA MOON IS A MOST LIKELY HEROINE By Abigail Keam William Faulkner’s line, “The past is never dead.  It’s not even past,” is one of the most quoted lines in American 20th-century fiction and resonates today in all literature including historical mysteries. Does history revolve in circles or undulate in waves? The same patterns keep emerging—the same type of grifters who try to con the gullible, the same type of heroes who risk everything, and those who watch from the sidelines. I have always been fascinated by history and knew I wanted to write an entertaining mystery series where I could combine fiction with historical fact. When I began writing my 1930s Mona Moon Mysteries, I decided to weave real people and events into the storyline. I wanted to make those mysteries come alive with both the saints and the scoundrels of the day. After doing much research, I discovered the 1930s had been politically explosive like the 1960s and even today with many of the same issues still confronting the world. So how does one incorporate themes of social justice, world events, and conflict into a mystery and write a story that is still entertaining and fun to read? Not with a hammer, but with a soft wave of a woman’s fan. One way is to give voice to a female protagonist to whom women will relate. The second is not to become “preachy.” My job as a mystery writer is to author an engaging story with facts that enhance  the reader’s enjoyment of the book—not deter. One thing that helps is that my intrepid champion speaks from the perspective of a gal who needed grit and resolve to survive the harrowing years of the Great Depression. She is my “every woman.” Enter Mona Moon, my American cartographer, who is broke with no prospects in sight. Not good news for a single woman in one of the worst years of the Depression. A man, wearing a Homburg hat, knocks on her tenement door after midnight.  She answers with a pistol in hand. The man announces he is a lawyer representing her estranged dead uncle and informs Mona that she has inherited the Moon family fortune. With that introduction, I plucked Mona from New York City and planted her on a horse farm in Kentucky’s Bluegrass where Mona discovers that half of her farm hands can barely read or write, her bank refuses to give her credit because she’s a woman, and the employees at the Moon copper mines are threatening to strike due to low pay. All three concerns were real issues in the 1930s, which caused protests/riots in the dark days of the Depression—lack of educational opportunities, women’s economic rights, and workers scraping by on subsistence pay. Several years have gone by, and now Mona has married the dashing, but brooding Robert Farley, Duke of Brynelleth. They take the RMS Majesty ship to Great Britain where they stay at Robert’s ancestral estate, Brynelleth, and then on to a Mediterranean cruise. However, they receive a telegram from Robert’s old friend, Lady Eustacia, begging them to come. When they arrive Blackhaven Hall, a Norman castle built by William the Conqueror, they find Lady Eustacia missing. To make matters worse, there is a terrible storm which threatens their connection to the outside world.  Our intrepid Mona Moon goes sleuthing and finds out things are not so good in Lady Eustacia’s world.  Where is Lady Eustacia and is she alive? I believe Faulkner was right about the past. It is never dead, and writers can incorporate the past into their historical mysteries making them richer. If a reader enjoys the mystery and learns something as well, then I am thrilled because we should all be keepers of history. And as we all know from a good mystery, secrets from the past never stay buried.  See you between the pages. Thank you Abigail for visiting today. ______ Keep reading for more information about Abigail and her new Mona Moon Mystery! About Murder Under A Cold Moon Murder Under A Cold Moon: A 1930s Mona Moon Historical Cozy Mystery Historical Cozy Mystery 13th in Series Setting - At Blackhaven Hall in England Publisher ‏ : ‎ Worker Bee Press (September 30, 2024) Number of Pages - 230 Digital ASIN ‏ : ‎ B0CSXV3J1N Mona Moon and her new husband, Robert Farley, Duke of Brynelleth are on their honeymoon at last. They are invited to a weekend party by an old friend of Robert’s family—Lady Eustacia. Mona and Robert arrive in a substantial downpour to find several other couples awaiting the appearance of their hostess. When Lady Eustacia fails to come downstairs, Mona and Robert search the manor house only to find the lady missing. It is then they discover the telephone wires have been cut and none of the cars are able to drive into town due to the storm. Mona and Robert believe the invitation was a ruse, but for what purpose? And how do they help Lady Eustacia? About Abigail Keam Award-winning author Abigail Keam writes the Mona Moon Mystery Series—a rags-to-riches 1930s mystery series, which weaves real people and events into the story line. “I am a student of history and love to insert historical information into my mysteries. There is an addendum at the end of the mystery to give more information. My goal is to entertain my readers, but if they learn a little something along the way—well, then we are both happy.” Miss Abigail currently lives on the Palisades bordering the Kentucky River in a metal house with her husband and various critters. AWARDS 2010 Gold Medal Award from Readers' Favorite for Death By A HoneyBee 2011 Gold Medal Award from Readers' Favorite for Death By Drowning 2011 USA BOOK NEWS-Best Books List of 2011 as a Finalist for Death By Drowning 2011 USA BOOK NEWS-Best Books List of 2011 as a Finalist for Death By A HoneyBee 2017 Finalist from Readers' Favorite for Death By Design 2019 Honorable Mention from Readers' Favorite for Death By Stalking 2019 Murder Under A Blue Moon voted top ten mystery reads by Kings River Life Magazine 2020 Finalist from Readers' Favorite for Murder Under A Blue Moon 2020 Imadjinn Award for Best Mystery for Death By Stalking 2022 Finalist in Killer Nashville Silver Falchion Finalist for Best Historical Category - Murder Under A Full Moon 2022 Finalist the Killer Nashville Silver Falchion Award for Best Historical Category - Murder Under A New Moon 2022 Death By Chance: A Josiah Reynolds Mystery Killer Nashville Silver Falchion Finalist for Best Cozy Mystery 2022 Top Ten Mystery Novel by Kings River Life Magazine for Murder Under A Bridal Moon: A 1930s Mona Moon Mystery 2022 Top Ten Mystery Novel by Kings River Life Magazine for Murder Under A British Moon: A 1930s Mona Moon Mystery THE MONA MOON MYSTERY SERIES 1930s Historical Mysteries Murder Under A Blue Moon I Murder Under A Blood Moon II Murder Under A Bad Moon III Murder Under A Silver Moon IV Murder Under A Wolf Moon V Murder Under A Black Moon VI Murder Under A Full Moon VII Murder Under A New Moon VIII Murder Under A English Moon IX Murder Under A British Moon X Murder Under A Bridal Moon XI Murder Under A Western Moon Murder Under A Honey Moon Murder Under A Cold Moon Murder Under A Mystic Moon Author Links Official Site      Facebook    Instagram    Pinterest      Amazon       TikTok  Purchase Links - Amazon -  Kobo  - B&N - Google  - Apple  Abigail Keam also writes the Josiah Reynolds Mystery Series. Find those books HERE. TOUR PARTICIPANTS - Please visit all the stops.  September 30 – Guatemala Paula Loves to Read – CHARACTER GUEST POST October 1 – Mystery, Thrillers, and Suspense – SPOTLIGHT October 2 – Novels Alive – REVIEW October 2 – FUONLYKNEW – SPOTLIGHT October 3 – Christy's Cozy Corners – AUTHOR GUEST POST October 3 – Celticlady's Reviews – SPOTLIGHT October 3 – Books, Ramblings, and Tea – SPOTLIGHT October 4 – Baroness Book Trove – SPOTLIGHT October 5 – Elizabeth McKenna - Author – SPOTLIGHT October 5 – Escape With Dollycas Into A Good Book – AUTHOR GUEST POST October 6 – Sapphyria's Book Reviews – SPOTLIGHT October 6 – Ruff Drafts – SPOTLIGHT October 7 – Maureen's Musings - SPOTLIGHT October 7 – Cozy Up With Kathy – CHARACTER GUEST POST a Rafflecopter giveaway Have you signed up to be a Tour Host? Click Here to Find Details and Sign Up Today! Want to Book a Tour? Click Here Your Escape Into A Good Book Travel Agent This post contains affiliate links. If you make a purchase using my links, I will receive a small commission from the sale at no cost to you. Thank you for supporting Escape With Dollycas. Read the full article

[shamelessrabbithole]

You were so right about Hissrich and the lady whose name I forgot. I would pay you money if I ever need a background check on someone. Sleuthing Queen 👸🏻

🙇🏻‍♀️ thank you, kind 🧸. I’d posted back in April that they’d gotten engaged. So, you never know. There may be a Hissrich wedding in the future we get to see the Shameless folk all attend.

[open-hearth-rpg]

Open Hearth Video Roundup - April 26, 2024

Welcome to the Open Hearth Gaming video roundup!

These recorded sessions represent only a portion of the games we play every week, and anyone is welcome to join the fun! If you'd like to play in games like these, join our Playabl community and click on the "Calendar" tab to sign up for upcoming games. To browse our entire library of session videos, please visit our YouTube Playlists page.

You can now listen to sessions as podcasts as well!

Open Hearth Gaming Calendar

Urban Shadows 2E Cale P runs for Brandon Brylawski, Elle, Jesse A., and Kae Session 0 (Character creation and world building) for an Urban Shadows quarterly.

Urban Shadows 2E (Session 1) Cale P runs for Brandon Brylawski, Elle, Jesse A., and Kae In which Red is friend-napped, Cary is mauled, and Dancy and Dara react to these offronts.

Urban Shadows 2E: Guest Stars! Cale P runs for David Miessler-Kubanek and Steven S. We prep guest stars Morgan (a Gargoyle) and Miss Mash (a Tainted) for the next session.

Urban Shadows 2E (Session 2) Cale P runs for Brandon Brylawski, David Miessler-Kubanek, Kae, and Steven S. Our cast collides and revolves around the friend-napped Red.

Trail of Cthulhu: Fearful Symmetries: Arc Two (Session 8) Lowell Francis runs for Alun R., Paul Rivers, Sherri, and Will H With the death of one of Lady Verity's entourage, Dr. Whitewood goes into full sleuth mode. Richard and other others look further into the magical and supernatural happenings. Isabella deals with the artifacts in Jaeger's safe. But the situation grow more complicated and meta, leading to the center of a maze, the telling of a story, and the temptation of a king.

The Mecha Hack: Q’ku Riposte (Session 9) Anya Reyes runs for Lowell Francis, Marc Majcher, and Sherri (Due to a recording problem this session is uploaded in two parts.) The strike team sets off to attack the Collective main facility and the Kaiju weaponization program. If they succeed the collective presence in the quadrant will be all but obliterated. It's just a matter of destroying the most secure building on the planet.

The Mecha Hack: Q’ku Riposte (Session 10) Anya Reyes runs for Lowell Francis, Marc Majcher, and Sherri [Epilogue] - A week has passed since the strike team took The Collective kaiju weaponization program facility. Selim has recovered and needs to answer to Prince Selina. Meanwhile the vipers set off to find their allies. Everyone stands to decide the future of Aurelia.

Girl by Moonlight: On a Sea of Stars (Session 3 of 5) Donogh runs for Ian, Matthew Doughty, and Sabine V. Iris/Horizon the Time Traveler arrives back from a solo mission just in time to defend the Last Bastion. But with the delay in their launch, only they are still aboard to come face to face with a Leviathan as it breaches their hangar, wreaking havoc and sowing dissent...

Girl by Moonlight: On a Sea of Stars (Session 4 of 5) Donogh runs for Ian, Matthew Doughty, and Sabine V. In the aftermath of their defence of the Last Bastion, relationships are frayed and nerves raw. Iris struggles with her place in the congregation and with her secret lover. Jet's workcrew throw abuse in his direction for his role in the Relic's destruction. And Cordelia's faith shines through, despite her mentor's misgivings over her official rejection from the pilot programme...

Girl By Moonlight: Divine Engines (Session 10) Lowell Francis runs for Ethan Harvey, Patrick Knowles, Sherri, and Tyler Lominack We return to this series after a mid-season break. Our pilots deal with the fallout from their last mission and begin to sense troubles in Bastion. The other team isolated and information becomes scarce. Then, after days of not being told anything, the secrets of this penultimate mission are finally revealed.

Star Wars Saturday

Fellowship (Session 8) Rich Rogers runs for Cody Eastlick, Kae, Steven Watkins, and Tyler Lominack An unexpected revival drives the fellowship into a showdown in Malicos' Tower.

Stars in the Dark: Stars in the Dark II (Session 7) Anders runs for Marc Majcher, Mark (they/them), Rich Rogers, and Steven Watkins Betrayal?!

Fellowship (Session 9) Rich Rogers runs for Cody Eastlick, Greg G., Kae, and Steven Watkins The fellowship deals with the aftermath of their fight with Taron Malicos.

Off-Calendar Highlights

Trophy Gold: Hissing Darkness: In the Wake of Secrets (Session 3) Madelancholy runs for Dom, James, Jazy, and Mike Ferdinando The survivors take on the Hunter in the Maze and welcome a sentient mech to their number in combat. The remains of a lost hunter is brought along as a desiccated souvenir. As the group enters the Under-Hull, they find more warped technology in the chemical slurry...among other things...

Trophy Gold: Hissing Darkness: In the Wake of Secrets (Session 4) Madelancholy runs for Dom, James, Jazy, and Mike Ferdinando The Fabricator-Forges upgrade and improve raw material and scavenged tech as they prepare the survivors - with the proper offering - furthering their journey. The survivors find their way into The Vastness--nothing can go wrong, communicating and communing with the Dark...

Trophy Gold: Hissing Darkness: In the Wake of Secrets (Session 5) Madelancholy runs for Dom, Jazy, and Mike Ferdinando The ASRU unit follows a different directive in exploring The Vastness while keeping contact with Somni. Somni finds signs of her sister which fuels her obsession to go deeper into The Ship to find her. Quixote Communes and merges with the vestiges of dark consciousness and Pol finds a sentient contact, divining a necessary sacrifice is needed to go further. The remainder of the party make their way from the Dark Void to...the Engine.

Trophy Gold: Hissing Darkness: Whispers in Exile (Session 3) Madelancholy runs for Amanda/iamatrex, B, Jonn, and Marc Majcher A plunge into chemical slurry. Encounters with camouflaged crawlers. An...offering made to twisted technology. Memories bleeding into the warped present, as someone makes a startling discovery about themselves. With all this, the survivors make it out of the Under-Hull and into the next area...

Trophy Gold: Hissing Darkness: Whispers in Exile (Session 4) Madelancholy runs for Amanda/iamatrex, B, Jonn, and Marc Majcher The Vastness overwhelms with its breadth and strange paths over a cascade of living Darkness. A tenuous connection remembered, a memory before entering cryo-sleep. A ride on a membranous elevator increases tension. Altars call out in this cathedral-like space and a survivor is lost...

Trophy Gold: Hissing Darkness: Whispers in Exile (Session 5) Madelancholy runs for Amanda/iamatrex, B, Jonn, and Marc Majcher Another survivor - Jaxu's sister Jada - has followed the group into the Dark Void out onto the hull. Dr. Mullen and Cecile Commune with the Darkness and understand what needs to be done when they reach the Engine. Hart tries to save them from themselves but without success. Jada decides it needs to all come down... [Content warning: narrations of blood, sacrifice, murder.]

The Between: Stars and Suns, Season Two (Session 10) Madelancholy runs for Jack, Mike, Sarah W., and Steph "The Morning After" - Discussions, dessert, and recriminations the morning after. A protegé is sent away for his own safety. Strange details on a body in the morgue are pointed out over port.

The Between: Stars and Suns, Season Two (Session 11) Madelancholy runs for Jack, Mike, and Steph "Lost Souls" - This Night Phase sees the hunters attempt to resolve the demonic Threat residing at Kilborn Abbey, each in their own way, while a play of twisted science occurs across town. The Mask of Sacrilege was narrated to horrifying effect at the end of the session.

[darkeraven22]

Seven Seas The Two Of Them Are Pretty Much Like This Volume 3 Review Chapter Fifty-Seven (Digital)

When The Going Gets Tough, The Tough Rehearse At A Karaoke JointNext Chapter the series creator pulls the ground out from under our lady trio concerning Three Sister Sleuths. But that is tomorrow. Here? Wako seems to be all over the place in her tablet. Social Media Gaming, Shonen Manga, Four Panel Manga of cutesy nature. Do we need to play a game of Sakuma’s Clues to figure Walk out? Should we…

[bethanyactually]

Hi Bethany! It's your Secret Sleuth with a few questions for you!

What are your favorite songs and lyrics by Sara Bareilles and Barenaked Ladies?

What are your favorite "bright" colors?

What are your favorite Nace scenes and why?

What is your favorite ND season and why?

What is your favorite season?

Thanks in advance and happy holidays! :)

Hello, and Happy Thanksgiving to you if you're in the US! 1. Favorite Sara Bareilles (link to my tag) songs include Cassiopeia, Chasing the Sun, I Choose You, Eyes On You, Gonna Get Over You, Hercules, Orpheus, Satellite Call, Someone Who Loves Me, Love Is Christmas, and did I mention Orpheus?? Lyrics I love include, but are not limited to: from Orpheus: You were written in the stars that we are swimming in And it has no name, no guarantee It's just the promise of a day I know that some may never see But that’s enough, if the bottom drops out I hope my love was someone else's solid ground from I Choose You: We are not perfect We'll learn from our mistakes And as long as it takes I will prove my love to you I am not scared of the elements I am underprepared, but I am willing And even better I get to be the other half of you

from Love Is Christmas: Why so scared that you’ll mess it up? When perfection keeps you haunted All we need is your best my love, that’s all anyone ever wanted Love is how we do, let no judgment overrule it Love I look to you, and I sing

[the rest of my answers are below the cut]

Favorite Barenaked Ladies (link to my tag) song of all time is Odds Are (which @bess-turani-marvin used in a Drew Crew gifset once!):

I also love Break Your Heart, especially the live version on Rock Spectacle, but that's more for the music and showmanship--not really a song I'd apply to a ship I wanted to be happy. 😅 I also love the songs These Apples, Who Needs Sleep, The Humour of the Situation, Tonight Is The Night I Fell Asleep At The Wheel, Aluminum, Unfinished, For You, Upside Down, Bank Job, Wind It Up, Give It Back To You, Did I Say That Out Loud, New Disaster...I could go on but I'll stop there. 2. My favorite colors are sunflower yellow, orange like an orange, turquoise, tomato red, magenta, grass green.

3. I love every hug between Nancy and Ace; every time Nancy shoots Ace an amused sidelong glance; all of their scenes in 107; all of their scenes in 114, the scene in Owen's apartment in 118; the 'I know you'/'I know you too' scene in 209; everything about them in 218; all their scenes in 307; Ace telling Nancy in 312 that Temperance took advantage of her, she does everything she can to protect the town; their conversation at Ace's at the end of 402; the morgue conversation in 405; the 'I forgive you' scene in 413.

4. Favorite ND season has gotta be S2, I think, because it's such a coherent story from beginning to end, with what is possibly the best and most satisfying season finale I've ever seen.

5. My favorite season is fall!

You are so welcome, and thank YOU in advance! I'm excited to see what you do for the exchange!