#the 12 pains of christmas

[annoyingheartenthusiast]

The 12 pains of Christmas ..in inanimate insanity!

[jezabatlovesbats]

Wow, it’s that time of year again already?

Here's the 12 Pains of Christmas challenge I did last year, inspired by the Bob Rivers parody song...

”Why did you even ask ME to come along and do this with you? I’m not a tree expert.”

”I asked you to come simply because I wanted you to.”

”Badgerclops, if you think you can do it better than I can, then why don’t YOU rig up the lights?!”

“You mustn’t let your daughter see you like this!”

”She won’t. She’s out with her friends right now.”

Dear Sgt. Wolf, Merry Christmas! Or should I say, Happy Holidays? Do they even celebrate Christmas where you live now? I mean, I did see a tree in your part of the castle when I last came to visit, so I guess they do it where you grew up. Whatever. So, have you been playing out in the snow a lot lately? If so, that’s good to hear!

“And to stop staying up until 1 AM playing your video games.”

“EE-VAAAH!”

Day 7 was Charities, but I scrapped the OCs I drew for that day, so it's deleted now.

“I’m not going to buy you anything if THAT’S how you’re going to speak to me, young miss.”

Day 9 was Finding Parking Spaces, but I scrapped the OCs I made for that day, too.

“If anyone can lend us some, it would be those from the pop tribe.”

“Well, if you won’t like that, have you ever watched any of those old stop-motion movies?”

“I’ve seen the one about the reindeer. That giant hairy white monster sure freaked King out.”

”🎶 There is just one thing I need~”

”Oh no… this is the Christmas song that has scarred the ears of retail workers EVERYWHERE.”

[soupy-sez]

FAY'S 12 DAYS OF CHRISTMAS (1995) dir. William Wegman

[valiantstarlights]

[Wedding Planner AU] Part 2: On the Restaurant's Balcony Area.

Tagging: @unfortunatelyevent @usernamesareoverratedseriously and @mademoisellemacabre , all of whom have expressed wanting to read more of this AU. I hope you like it. 🖤

--

"I was thinking the wedding should take place just as the sun starts to dip into the horizon, and the reception be held right after," Mrs. Nyx Endless says, then titters. "Of course, the reception would last until morning. We have to make sure that all our hundreds of guests are happy until they leave, and that would be whatever time they decide to leave. I'm thinking an open bar and two dozen new hors d'oeuvres every half an hour. We'd absolutely hate to bore anyone."

Hob nods and notes all of those down, saying nothing but already cursing internally. A sunset wedding alone is going to be hell to arrange. He'd have to consult actual meteorologists for it, and then pray to a hundred different gods to make sure it's not going to be rainy, cloudy, or whatever the hell England's weather is planning to do on that date. And two dozen new hors d'oeuvres every half an hour? Christ.

"A sunset wedding sounds marvellous, Nyx," Mrs. Muse agrees. "The golden hues of the sun would complement the golden theme of the wedding. And, of course, Calliope must look like Midas's daughter herself."

Hob nods dutifully again and notes that down, careful to keep his face blank, then bites the insides of his cheeks so he doesn't laugh in Mrs. Muse's face at that unfortunate reference.

Were Ms. Calliope to look like Midas's daughter herself, then Dream would be marrying a silent, golden statue. But then again, maybe he would prefer that. Lord knows he'd want someone as different from Hob as he could get, who everyone and their 3rd butler knows is just one dirty, stinking, unworthy, flea-bitten mongrel.

"I..." Calliope hesitates, then looks around for support. Hob pointedly does not notice how she toys with Dream's fingers, and how Dream squeezes her hand back. It looked like an automatic, intimate gesture. A silent conversation where meanings are translated almost instantaneously because of how well one understands the other. Hob looks steadfastly down at his notes and wills his own hands not to shake. "I would just like to have a simple garden wedding, actually."

Mrs. Muse tuts at her. "Nonsense, darling. A 'simple garden wedding' will not be the most talked-about event of the season. No, we'll have to have your wedding on a beach, somewhere lovely with white sand, and you'll be bedecked in topaz and sapphires like a goddess."

Mrs. Endless gasps in excitement. "Oh, Mnemosyne, that's such a brilliant idea! Sweet Calliope would look absolutely stunning in topaz and sapphire jewelry, while Dream could wear some matching blue and yellow roses pinned on his lapel."

Hob, again, says nothing to that and only notes everything down. In Calliope's previously empty column, he writes down '(simple) garden wedding.' In Mrs. Muse's column, he adds 'white sand beach wedding, sapphire and topaz jewelry (lots).' In Mrs. Endless's column, he adds 'blue and yellow roses pinned on groom's lapel.'

(Hob doesn't think he can write Dream's name yet. He thinks even that will hurt him.)

Dream has yet to say anything, and his column is as empty as the promises he once made to Hob. "And you, Mr. Endless?" Hob asks his notes. "Do you have any preferences?"

Dream takes a moment to even acknowledge that he has been asked a question. Hob thinks this is because Dream's father, that old curmudgeonly bastard, just died a year ago, and Dream is probably used to others saying, 'Mr. Endless' and the title referring only to his father. Well tough luck, because Hob isn't about to call him Young Master Dream or whatever their staff calls the Endless children.

"Anything Calliope wants," is what he finally says, voice still sounding the same, so hypnotizing and deep, if a bit hoarse, like he wasn't used to talking anymore. His eyes remain on the mostly full plate in front of him. He has barely eaten the previous courses, and his small square of chocolate cake with raspberry filling (decorated with gold leaf and a small gravity-defying chocolate sculpture of a bird in flight) had only been played with to create the illusion that he took a bite.

Hob hates that he still notices these things. Notices these things and worry. That it still makes him want to drag Dream to the nearest hole-in-the-wall restaurant he knows where they serve cheap but hearty meals that fill your stomach as the cozy atmosphere fills your soul.

"Dream," Mrs. Endless scolds. "Will it kill you to sound enthusiastic? This is your wedding, too, you know!"

Mrs. Muse hushes her friend and coos at Dream. "Oh, Nyx, please, it's fine." To her daughter, she says, "Did you hear that, Calliope? Dream says, 'Anything you want,' so you better want something truly spectacular! My, what a good man your son is, Nyx," she continues, seemingly not noticing how Mrs. Endless is continuing to scold Dream through her eyes. "So sweet and accommodating."

Mrs. Muse then turns to Hob like he is just another lady in her court during rich-people tea time. Like they were close and she isn't thinking about how his mere presence is polluting the very air she breathes. "Isn't he just the sweetest, Mr. Gadling?"

Hob thinks about his boyfriend Dream from years ago and how he is in the mornings, wearing nothing but Hob's ratty jumpers, his messy hair that looks like a bird's nest, his eyes soft and blinking sleep away, smiling at Hob like he's the most beautiful thing he has ever seen. He thinks about Dream's gentle, addicting little kisses that Hob only token protests at because finals week is coming up and they need to study and not fuck like rabbits again. He thinks of Dream saying, 'yes,' saying, 'I love you, Hob,' saying, 'I'll love you forever.'

Hob nods politely, showing Mrs. Muse his most impersonal smile and speaking in his most professional voice. "I'm sure he is."

[gxldeyes]

"What do we have no extension cords??" How the hell was he supposed to rig up these stupid lights without extension cords??

[raifuujin]

Secret archives arrived. Which I won't be scanning for another day or so because it happened to get delivered on my b-day, but I have seen some people really interested in seeing it, so. Soon.

Who knows about the other handful of books that need to be added. I have them, but some digital versions have been shared for some that might be better to link than my physical ones, and motivation can be hard when I have to provide it. Also I got a used copy of Animal Crossing Switch months ago and keeping up with that mostly-daily has taken a solid chunk of attention in my off time. And then there's this 1000 piece Pokemon Ditto puzzle--

[loving-jack-kelly]

i haven't had to cope with losing a dog since I was like eight or nine years old and it turns out. this shit sucks.

[livewireprojects]

Old 12 Pains of Christmas Sketches

After that big ass post about what was the predecessor to my Lost Prince AU here is some sketches I made once connected to an update to the predecessor that is more closer to how the present version is.

This was based off the song "The 12 Pains of Christmas" by Bob Rivers, if we're lucky I'll update this one day but we all know I might not get to it. I think this was also going to be a video but never got to it.

Fun fact I think these pics led to me giving up on FurAffinity thanks to them removing the images thanks to "noise issues in the audio" or some shit. Keep in mind this is a picture.(I did eventually make a new account but I'm still barely on there)

This kind of contains spoilers

First thing

Finding a Christmas tree, Sonic can't see(he's blind & has his eyes covered to keep them from getting even more damaged) & has an outfit based off the one I use to give his werehog form which is based on the fandom character(for Durarara) Psyche. Funny enough my introduction of the song 12 Pains of Christmas involved a Maple Story video were someone has a blindfold & is trying to find a Christmas tree for the rest of the video.

Second thing

Knuckles has his gloves off or different gloves on for this. He's doing this cause the guy for this part was pissed the whole time. I mistakenly didn't get the second pic of him that you see in the corner.

Kunckles is rigging up the lights & Rouge is coming up the building to help. Lara is flying off to help while Mephiles, Sonic & Shadow are there in the distance watching.

Third thing

Manic is hung over, this was when Kur was still around in my stuff & the poor naga is helping him

Forth thing

Uncle Chuck sending Christmas cards

Had no idea who to put for this

Fifth thing

Vector dealing with months of bills

Sixth thing

Revived Cosmo(at one point I had the idea of her being a squirrel before making her a chipmunk) panicking over her in-laws. Oh hey Bokkun is in the corner.

Jules scares her but Blaze's mom(Blaze is technically niece-in-law) scares her more. Apparently even back in 2014 I imagined Blaze's mom being a terrible person.

Seventh thing

Salvation Army

I forgot what the secret message for this was but I know it was something bad I learned the Salvation Army did cause they did some terrible shit.

Yeah Tails doesn't want to be here.

Eighth Thing

Obligatory mention that Sonic X was my first Sonic series

Bokkun bothering Eggman, the poor bastard

Ninth thing

No parking

I haven't drawn Chris in a long time, oh hey I got his hair right this time.(Last time I had a pic of him in his late teens/adult design I gave him his 12 year old design's hair)

Tenth thing

Batteries not included

Vanilla is confused

Eleventh thing

Big, Blaze & Silver watching stale TV specials

Froggy is sleeping in a fish tank setup for a frog enclosure when not off somewhere with Big

Twelfth thing

Cubot, Bocoe, Decoe & Orbot singing Christmas carols

I didn't feel like fully drawing Cubot & Orbot's bodies so they're in closed shape mode.

It's kind of funny seeing these four together because I imagine at some point Bocoe & Decoe had leftby the time Orbot was in the picture.(Orbot showed up before Cubot became his kind of work partner since these robots meant to be Eggman's righthand men work in pairs)

Bonus image

Don't ask why "Arcobaleno of the" is there, that was for something else & I forgot the context past Katekyo Hitman Reborn.

This was meant to be a space filler that'd be there every time the number changed which is why the sign is blank.

Pretty much Mephiles dressed for Christmas(Sonia gave him the sweater) holding a sign for every time the number changed in the song. Next to him are Shadow & Sonic's daughter Maria along with Mephiles & Sonic's daughter Helen. Both have had their names changed & have had design changes(since both look way too much like who they got their names from), I also have no idea why Helen's mouth is visible cause she's meant to have an invisible mouth like her dad.

This was also back from when I didn't draw eyebrows unless they were needed for certain expressions.

[darnellclayton]

😂🤣😂

The 12 pains of Christmas 🎄 (a classic). Most of these are true no matter how many years go by!

[darkenedtogray]

"Fine, if you're so smart, you rig up the lights!" Heba wasn't a very patient man to begin with, but if his boss was going to keep on him about how he was doing this wrong when he was the one who badgered him to do it to begin with, that he could do it himself!

[pancakesthewormwithcandy]

I'm finally off work for christmas but at what cost.

[thatonesalmonlingnamedspike]

the 1st thing of christmas thats such a pain to me

finding a christmas tree

[worst-xmas-song-bracket]

First Round (25/32)

Reblog for bigger sample size and all that

[mani-mari]

so my mortal enemy of Christmas music is that Alvin and the Chipmunks song.

and my best friend of Christmas music is the Twelve Pains of Christmas.

like if you listen to the Alvin one your soul is ripped to shreds but then you listen to the 12 pains and it glues it back together and slaps a bandaid on top. that's me personally.

[antvnger]

*connects to the iPod nano that I hid in the suit forever ago*

*has it play the twelve pains of Christmas on a loop*

Happy Holidays!

-Meme Lord

Meme Looooooord.

Once was funny. We’re going on five times now…

*takes my suit apart until I find the iPod nano*

Finally! Sweet relief…

[snowmiserboio]

Absolutely fuming rn that all the cool platform shoes are exclusive to women

Fuming even more that none of the shoes are in a size that are the same as mine rip