#the 'that doesn't happen' to 'ok it totally does but its for your own good and also the version i made up in my head seems more accurate

[festivalfoxes]

fucking bonkers bananas to me how much the narrative around having fucked up traumatic life experiences is that you lived in a Different, Unreal world and have to adapt to the Real World, Where People Don't Do That. it is either the same fuckin world or a different one of equivalent realness. and your dumbshit Good Normal Life Views have plenty of fail states too, like imagining that everything bad is sequestered in a fucking pocket dimension

[simplyreveries]

when theyre pining; vice dorm leaders!

trey clover

trey always had an eye on you ever since he met you, as the "magicless person from another world" he was pretty intrigued by you. he only grew closer to you from there. with his personality i feel like its easy to take his intentions more as a friend more than someone who's interested in you. and trey tries his best to get his feelings across that hes fallen quite literally hopeless for you. (will die if you ever hit him with the "oh youre like such a friend/brother to me!")

ace gets so offended when you get all the extras of his treats or that you're the first one to get some of his baked goods. he’ll complain that saying that “that's no fair- you're trey’s favorite!” and trey laughs but doesn’t deny it.

he tries to be as helpful and caring towards you, he does feel some remorse for your situation and all too. if you need help with anything pleaasee go to him because he loves being someone you can rely on.

ok so, trey can flirt... if hes not thinking about it. like if he puts himself into this mindset of "I'm totally going to woo you with these words" he is a fool. we all saw his painful attempts during the ghost marriage event. I'll never forget that he compared the brides' eyes to grapes.... needless to say, he totally messes up around you like that all the time. cater once happened to witness one of these instances and went through the five stages of grief.

ruggie bucchi

ruggie plays off any feelings he has towards you like he's not taking it seriously. he gives off pretty confusing signals during the beginning when he started to develop feelings for you. perhaps its just because of how overwhelmed he feels and doesn't know how to physically handle it. he cannot get you out of his brain no matter how much he tries.

he finds it hard to trust. when someone does something for him he always assumes it's because they're going to want something in return. so when you just help him sometimes when you catch him doing some random tasks for leona and try to help him hes... confused. and truthfully doesn't accept your help for a while, he'll brush it off. but he still remembers that.

judging by your situation and practically being thrown into this world without any of your own belongings, you're in a tight spot with money. sometimes when he does shifts at the mostro lounge and sees you there he starts to try sparking conversations with you. though it's probably him attempting to discreetly make fun of some customer that was being rude to you. ruggie feels all giddy and excited when he makes you laugh.

he gets all playful around you, you know he's around when you hear his mischievous laugh. sometimes he uses "laugh with me" to move you closer to him he'd say "i didnt know you were so excited to see me...!" and laugh. you can only roll your eyes.

jade leech

jade is... interesting when it comes to having feelings. because its pretty intense once you've caught his attention. he's also just so strange when it comes to showing that. as much as he desperately does want to call you his and all, he enjoys the stage where you're unaware of how he feels. he thinks it's like a game to win you over or something and he likes a little challenge.

jades love language is telling you that he saw a nice-looking mushroom during one of his hikes and it reminded him of you. okay seriously though, he'll love to share to you all about his little terrariums, he's quite proud of himself.

he loves it whenever you come by the mostro lounge, trust me he'll be there ready to serve you the moment you're there. he playfully tells you that you're his favorite customer. so, you get extra good meals done specially by jade, he'll ask you what you thought of it. one time he messed with you by telling you he used a random plant he found and wanted to know if it was edible... and was like "hehe...i kid, dont worry".. he thought your reaction was quite amusing.

not going to lie this guy literally just spawns like you could be in the library chatting with grim and turn around and he's there??? he smiles and is like "ah (name) how pleasant to see you here." :))) HUH??

jamil viper

jamil was in complete denial with his feelings for you, he hated himself almost because he feels like he is making the biggest mistake falling in love with someone from a completely different world. he has never felt so intensely about someone until you arrived. to push his feelings away for a while and just yearned for you from a distance.

nevertheless, you being you always try to talk and get closer to him, and he can't resist his feelings growing so much with each conversation (even if it's mostly one sided from your behalf). whenever he sees you at one of kalims parties and celebrations he almost freezes and can only stare at you... until kalim follows his line of vision and gets an excited grin, starting to laugh and its over for jamil. that guy is going to make so many painfully obvious attempts at getting the two of you together.

he gets pretty quiet around you, if you didn't know him well it may seem like he didn't like you but trust me that is absolutely not the case here. since he listens and remembers a lot of what you say, he tries to use that as an opportunity to attempt talking more to you. it's cute to see him try, even if its mundane things like cooking. but if you bring up hobbies, he enjoys like basketball club and dancing he'll become more talkative.

whenever you do small things like acknowledge him?? compliment him?? hes smitten and hates it so much. usually, these things don't really matter to him when he hears it from others but when it comes from you? its very important. you sound so genuine too about it. or even go out of your way to help him with anything since he has a lot on his plate as vice dorm leader.

rook hunt

once he's got his eye on you it's over because you're going to be constantly seeing him everywhere...! he is so incredibly infatuated with you and won't hesitate to tell you that. you've captivated him in every way- he finds your beauty to be irresistible, that he finds it a no-brainer that he's deeply harboring feelings for someone such as yourself.

rook is literally so weird when it comes to you im sorry. but its ROOK. he notices everything about you "is this a new perfume? ah its so lovely!! beauté!!" right after you just awkwardly said "good morning" to him when he was staring at you blissfully.

speaking of staring... wowie he cannot take his eyes off of you. he'll sigh dreamily like RIGHT next to you with his head in his hands thinking how truly captivating you are. and whenever you decide to talk to him, he literally listens to every word you say- but hey, at least no conversation with him is dry or boring with him because this man can talk forever about anything. he'll even tell you more about himself.

he tends to put you on this pedestal. literally, you can do nothing wrong in his eyes. rook will write you poems upon poems, gifting your beautiful things and tells you that they remind him of you, and he just simply had to give them to you.

lilia vanrouge

done here!

[hlficlibrary]

HL FIC LIBRARY ☕ Coffee Shop Fics

Remember to leave kudos and a comment on the fics you enjoyed to show your appreciation! You can find the library's other recs here.

☕ I’d Still Dance With You by kikikryslee / @flamboyantommo {M, 57k}

“Liam, if you met someone that you really liked, would age matter?” Louis asked. “I suppose so; to a point, anyway.” “Like, how young would you go?” Liam thought it over. “Uh… I don’t know. Like, 24?” Louis groaned and dropped his head in his hands. “Why? How old is this guy you like?” “Twenty-one,” Louis muttered. “Hang on. He’s 21, and you’re… what? Twenty-eight?” “Yeah.” “Wow. Um… well, OK. That’s a, uh, that’s a gap.”

Or, the 21/28 age difference fic where Harry is younger than Louis thought he was, and even though Louis’ head is telling him not to pursue anything, his heart doesn’t seem to agree.

☕ I Really Like Your Styles: The Baking Advent-ure by @homosociallyyours {T, 34k}

Louis isn't much for frills, and the coffee shop he co-owns with his best friend Liam is evidence of that. Yes, it's got a decent sized, well-kept industrial kitchen, but Louis insists that people come to coffee shops for coffee, not mediocre pastry and plastic wrapped cookies. When Liam's campaign for serving treats turns into watching a few baking accounts on whichever popular app he's on, there's one that really gets on Louis' nerves: "I Like Your Styles." With his chipper demeanor and over the top descriptions of the food he makes, Louis is sure that the (unfortunately cute) baker is full of it. Nothing that adorable could possibly be worth the hype.

It doesn't actually take much for him to eat his words...and some quality baked goods, while he's at it.

☕ love drunk, waiting on a miracle by @hellolovers13 {E, 30k}

Christmas inspired Coffeshop AU

Harry has a bit of a crush on a customer. Thankfully, the feeling is mutual.

These are their first 24 days together.

☕ And That’s The Tea by @2tiedships2​ {M, 27k}

I’d like an Earl Grey with milk and sugar, please.

Louis had the phrase memorized, even though it had disappeared off its place on his upper arm over thirteen years ago now.

At fourteen he didn’t understand. Soulmarks don’t just disappear. Not unless…

Unless one of them dies.

Or, the one where Louis loses his soulmate before even getting the chance to meet them, and he is in no way prepared for the kind of distraction his new friend Harry proves to be.

☕ Friday I'm in Love by @perfectdagger {M, 25k}

It has a pattern, Harry has noticed.It’s not that he has been observing the guy who regularly comes to the coffee shop for the past few weeks; but he totally has.It’s also not Harry’s fault that he’s infatuated with the guy who apparently follows a very repetitive schedule.

Or the one where Harry works at the coffee shop and Louis goes there almost every day and Harry is head over heels for him, making his love life look like a The Cure song.

Inspired by Friday I’m in Love by The Cure (obviously).

☕ From The Heart (series) by jacaranda_bloom / @jacaranda-bloom {E, 24k}

Every Tuesday, Louis spends his day off holed up in his favorite coffee-come-bookshop, writing his little stories as part of the WordPlay challenge while daydreaming about the resident barista, Harry. Each week a new word prompt is revealed and Louis adds to his series of short stories about Henry, the owner of a B&B in the Cotswolds who has curly hair and dimples, Lewis, his long term guest who just happens to be a writer, and Tigger, Henry’s cat.

As Louis and Harry’s friendship develops, could his fantasy world spill out into real life? And how does that reader who leaves the lovely comments with the teacup emoji seem to be able to read Louis’ mind?

☕ ever since new york by @sunflower-live​ / sunflower_live {NR, 22k}

Louis works at a coffee shop in NYC and he pines endlessly after the boy who lives above it.

☕ blend into my favourite colour by rainbowninja167 / @rainbowtitania {T, 19k}

Harry often wonders if they’ll ever meet in real life. And if Harry will recognize Tommo the instant they see each other, like somehow their souls will just know. Or maybe Harry’s soul is shouting “Louis!” too loudly for any other signals to go through.

Harry is a barista with a secret Werewolf High fan blog, a desperate crush on a customer named Louis, and a best friend on Tumblr who always makes him laugh. Louis can't figure out why the barista at his favorite coffee shop keeps creepily staring at him, and to make matters worse, he may be slightly in love with a friend he met online.

A love square involving two boys, one TV fandom, and one food fight.

☕ The Importance of being Earnest by @louloubabys1992​ / louloubaby92 {NR, 16k}

Harry cannot help but pay extra attention to Louis' order, even if it is just a warm cup of tea with a dash of milk and no sugar. He also makes sure that the Danish Louis asks for is warm and fresh from the oven and not the one in the display, even if it means delaying Louis a bit when he fetches said Danish from the kitchen. It's all worth it when Louis smiles his crinkly smile at him before he rushes off to work.

Man, he's hot, he cannot help but think.

Or Harry is a barista who's been harboring a crush on Louis for months. Little does he know that Louis actually likes him back.

☕ Before We Ever Wrote a Song by @casuallyhl​ {E, 13k}

Harry just can't be around Louis when he's flirting outrageously with Chad Michael Murray. So what if he's the star of one of the country's most popular shows? Harry's seen an episode or two and it's not that great. Sure, the drama is exciting and all the actors are attractive and it’s shot in his hometown, but still. Not that great. Certainly not great enough for Louis to fall over himself every time Chad enters the coffee shop.

Harry doesn’t want to watch the over-the-top spectacle, which is why he usually retreats.

And besides, it hurts to see the boy he’s in love with flirting with someone else.

Or, Harry and Louis work in a coffeehouse on a film studios lot, and Harry wishes Louis would pay half as much attention to him as he does the famous actors.

☕ A Love Stronger Than Espresso by tempolarriefics / @tempolarriefix {G, 12k}

Louis is entirely dependent on caramel mocha in the mornings, but soon he finds that there's one thing at the coffee shop he needs more than coffee - a cute barista named Harry.

aka: The one where Harry is a cute barista guy and Louis plays hard to get by using a different name to order coffee each day

☕ John Doe by FitzAndLarry {G, 12k}

John Doe I don't even know you, but I know fo' sho' That you are beautiful, so baby let me know Your name Damn what's his name?

xxx

There's a boy taking the stand at the open mic night where Harry works as a barista, and he's going to find out the boy's name if it's the last thing he does.

An ode to Never Shout Never, and a story about finding a new home.

☕ Coming Home Through the Dark to You by LadyLondonderry / @londonfoginacup {G, 6k}

Harry Styles works at the Fox in the Snow, the most hipster coffee joint around. He's got too many roommates and a best friend he met his first day of university who he might very well be head-over-heels for.

☕ ‘Sup by MediaWhore / @mediawhorefics​ {G, 6k}

Gemma really wants her little brother to sign up for a dating app and get back in the game after a messy divorce. Harry thinks he’s way too old to swipe. They compromise to devastatingly embarrassing results.

Meanwhile, all Louis wants is to finish the play he’s been commissioned to write, but one of the regulars at his local coffee shop keeps distracting him.

ft. older larry, pushy gemma, harry being a disaster gay and silver fox louis.

☕ Time Of The Season by alienharry {NR, 6k}

When writer's block stands in the way of Harry completing his second novel, he turns to the sweet-smelling omega behind the counter of his new favorite coffee shop for inspiration.

☕ I Kinda Need A Hero (Is It You) by @fallinglikethis {NR, 5k}

Louis is a barista who’s had his heart broken. Harry is the boy who wants to put the pieces back together.

☕ That's Not My Name by @lululawrence {NR, 3k}

He froze for a second, because he hadn’t expected to be hit with such an intense gaze. Green eyes beneath a beanie and loads of curly hair made Louis miss a beat before coming back to himself.

“Uh, hi. Sorry. Can I take your order?”

The boy (man?) gave a shy smile and said, “Just a caramel macchiato, please. Grande.” Louis nodded as he scribbled onto the cup and punched it into the register.

As the boy held his phone to the machine to pay, Louis asked, “Name please?”

“Oh, uh, Marcus.”

Louis scribbled Marcus on the cup and handed it off, but not before giving the boy a smile and nodding over to where he’d be able to pick up his drink. Louis watched him a bit longer than he probably should have, then forced himself to move on.

Or the one where the cute boy coming into the coffee shop gives Louis a different name every time...for over a month.

☕ A Cuppa Courage by @juliusschmidt {G, 3k}

Liam kicks Harry's shin, picking up another cup to fill. “He seems like he’d be a good catch, if you liked guys, I mean.”

I do like guys, Harry does not say, even though he’d like to shout it at the top of his lungs. I DO LIKE GUYS.

[a fluffy lil' fall coffee shop coming out au.]

☕ cursing the cosmos by 5sexualhomos / @hogwartzlou {NR, 3k}

In a world where people have timers counting down to when they meet their soulmate, finding love is easy. Harry meets Louis in a coffee shop one day. They slowly fall in love, the only thing holding them back is that they aren't soulmates.

☕ baby baby, you're a caramel macchiato by @missandrogyny {T, 3k}

So, yeah, Harry doesn't think it's that far of a stretch to call himself a good barista. There are some particularly bad ones, and some particularly good ones, and, with his work ethic, his skill, and his charm, he'd probably be lumped in with the latter group.

☕  tell me what you need by @disgruntledkittenface​ {G, 2k}

“And a fresh cherry?” he asks, pinching his bottom lip between his fingers. He waits as Louis stares him down, his brow furrowing.“No? What the fuck,” Louis rasps, looking bewildered.

coffeeshop AU based on this iconic prompt:

harry: can i please get a semi-iced half caramel half vanilla decaf latte with no foam using fresh almond milk with a small swirl of whipped cream covered in a pinch of cinnamon and a fresh cherry? louis: ...no? what the fuck

[thewisaaaaad]

AWWW FUCK

In my sleep deprived state, I have created YET ANOTHER AU by smashing together several ideas in my head, along with being inspired by @kamodofilez bells of the dammed au. Sorry for pinging you, but CREDIT IS DUE.

When am I going to run out of these oh lamb

Anyways here's the au. I call it the Regretful Hunter AU, no idea if i am going to continue with this.

In this AU, neither the lamb nor Narinder really wanted to fight.

As soon as Narinder heard the new prophecy through Ratau, he knew exactly what would happen.

Five becomes nothing? He wasn't stupid. He was going to fall too, just like all his siblings.

Good. It was what he deserved. It was what he wanted.

Narinder did the fight because he was actually tired of being the god of death, saw that the lamb was way better at being god than any of his siblings were, and wanted to pass the mantle. Of course, due to pride and family trauma, they couldn't just hand it over, so he tried to goad the lamb into killing him. He... doesn't really consider how Aym and Baal would feel about it. He forgot they were people, honestly, until it was too late to care.

The lamb, meanwhile, was totally chill with dying. They felt that they were OK at playing leader, but was ready to hand over the reins to the god that gave them the opportunity to take revenge for their people.

They were fully ready to let go, and see their family again in the afterlife. After all that had happened, they were just. So. Tired.

However, fate has ways of getting what it wants- including puppeting its victims. The lamb was conscious the whole time as they were forced to fight the person that gave them everything they had ever wanted and slay his guardians. They were just glad that they didn't have to kill him.

Narinder was less than pleased with the mercy. When the guilt of what he had done set in, he ran away from the cult before the lamb could explain what happened.

He planned on going out, finding a nice cliff with some sharp rocks at the bottom, and ending it once and for all.

Turns out, ending your life by your own hands is a lot harder than he thought. It can be pretty scary, standing at the edge.

He blames his mortality, of course.

Lamb, meanwhile, goes into a depression induced stupor, the young god just going through the motions of running a cult. ???'s arrival makes it a little easier, by giving them a goal to work towards, but they never stop hoping to find Narinder again. They know hes not dead yet.

They would feel it.

Narinder continues to survive in the forest, hunting critters using plumbata, or throwing arrows, made from stolen arrows. He goes around, surviving while cursing his cowardice, until one day he wanders through Silkcradle, looking for spiders to hunt.

Instead, he finds a panda and a skunk in mortal danger. Before, he would have let them die, for obviously if they had wanted to live then they would not have come here, doubly so for the panda who could have just never come to the lands of the old faith at all.

But now? Now he understands the fear of the end. How it can creep up on you without knowledge of its presence, how a foolish decision can seem like the best one to make in the moment.

So he saves them. They, of course, ask for his name.

He does not give it. Instead, he gives them the location of paradise, where they will be safe. When asked why he does not go there himself, he answers that "I had lost my right to that place long ago."

When Jalala and Rinor arrive at the lambs cult, they tell the lamb of the kind stranger who saved them, the cat with three red eyes.

The lamb gets excited. He's still out there. And he wishes he could be here.

They just have to talk to him.

[daemon-in-my-head]

Past Life Dark Urge Asks - 9th Edition:

OK but how does Durge actually view relationships and romance?

What does their room look like? Describe it to me. Neat? Messy? Organised mess where everything has its place?

What's their favourite spot to hang out at after a long day of temple managing and murdering in Father's name? Is it by the altar, their desk, a certain someone's office or by the docks?

Gorion's Ward was a hero and a Bhaalspawn that defied Bhaal. But they're also a powerful person who rose far above many, as well as the reason Sarevok once returned. What does Durge think of them? Is he an idol or a villain to them? When did their view of them change or do they perhaps even feel pity for the sibling which had been led astray?

Durge loves efficient killing, but what was their one little indulgence whenever they did it? I don't mean getting loot, keeping trinkets. Did they perhaps draw out the hunt or play with the mouse unfortunate enough to fall into their trap?

There's this funny bit that Durge refused to clean themselves, but is it true for yours? Did they indeed always carry the scent of entrails or did they bathe regularly? After all, Bhaals Scion has a reputation to uphold.

Speaking of Water, Baldur's Gate is a Port City. What did Durge think of the sea? Did they long to sail or do they prefer solid ground beneath their feet? Did they feel any connection, or was it just a body of water, perfect to drown some innocent souls?

Durge is clearly a skilled master of their craft, but would they ever consider taking an apprentice? Perhaps they already did? Or would they absolutely detest those who yet lack skill and prefer they attain it on their own?

Orin makes for a great spy and even the Bhaalist Temple relies on intelligence to survive and operate more efficiently. Did Durge ever try to help out Orin in attempts to gather intel? What was it like? Did they charm their way into hearts and minds, or did they rely on the thing they did best, a skillful killing?

Bhaalspawn are pretty similar to Aasimar in every aspect, well except that Aasimar are children of celestials and good aligned powers while Bhaalspawn hail from the Lord of Murder. What did Durge think of their goody-two-shoes counterparts?

Bhaal is widely hated or feared, as are Bhaalspawn, but what does Durge think about that notion? Would they hunt down anyone who dares speak I'll of their father, or could they not care any less? Do they perhaps revel in that fear and hatred?

If Durge knew they'd lose all their memories in the future, what would they think? Would they weep for their treasured moments or perhaps even feel delighted about forgetting a dreaded past?

Name a personality trait of theirs which is, in theory, something great, but they've taken it to such extremes it became something negative.

How is Durge handling failure? Do they handle it at all or do they just refuse to acknowledge any?

Would Past Life Durge like for their life's story to be told and remembered? Why or why not? In what way would they have liked it to be remembered?

In general, how does your Durge cope with stress, life, and the things that happened? How did it affect them? Are there any lasting effects from an outburst once?

On a scale of 1 to 10, how easily does your Durge snap? 1 being the world could end, and they'd barely be mildly inconvenienced, and 10 being somebody looks funny in their direction, and the next minute, they're in a nasty brawl.

What is their favorite spell? It doesn't have to be one they themselves know or learned. Just a spell they think is neat, handy, cool, etc.

If there happened to be a street fair in the Gate, would they attend? Yes or no, who would they go with, what would it be like visiting one of those with them?

Bhaal was a netherese arcanist. Does Durge, considering they're made from Bhaals flesh, consider themselves to be netherese? Have they ever thought about these things or do they simply not care?

I totally forgot I had these I'm sorry lmao. They've been rotting away in my drafts the whole time.

[kathaynesart]

What do you take from the Rise movie’s “This isn’t about me,” message? *It’d be interesting to see this become a Tumblr thread cause I’d love to see what others think too.

That's... an important line to decipher. Deep enough to mean so many things but vague enough to be easily taken out of context. I have a lot to say about it, but I'll keep it under the cut to save others the trouble.

TLDR: Future Leo's a dum dum hypocrite

I think... when Leo used the line in the future timeline. He was trying to remind Casey of the harsh reality that they existed in. That this was a world where they sometimes had to set aside their personal wants for the greater good. It's for that reason that Leo was able to ask Mikey to do the unthinkable and sacrifice himself in turn.

What I find fascinating about the movie, is that it both supports and counters this message. It tries to find that healthy middle ground, between present Leo's narcissistic attitude in the beginning and the downright sacrifice he's willing to make by the end. Because him sacrificing himself was NOT the happy ending. And while we get that "ending" for only a moment. We can see that method doesn't feel right either.

In that way, I don't think "it's not about me" isn't actually the "message" of the movie as some might assume at first glance. Merely a gentle reminder to check yourself before you wreck yourself. Because technically, yes, "it's not about me" does apply to many aspects of life. We can get so caught up in our own worries and concerns and perspectives and it just... muddles reality in a way. We need to see how our actions and words affect others and understand that there's so much more out there than our own little bubbles. But we also should understand our own worth within the big tapestry of life and be willing to fight for the things that matter to us.

That's why I think the actual message of the story isn't "it's not about me." It's about balance. It's about the knowing look Leo and Raph share in the end and the fact that Mikey was able to achieve the true, best ending with his brother's help to save Leo, because they know that the world may mean more in the long run, but they mean the world to each other, and I think it's really important to understand.

But that's just my long-winded opinion on the subject and there’s plenty of other interpretations I think I can totally get behind as well. It will be an element within Replica but let's also remember that Future Leo is kind of hypocrite with this line. He's says "It's not about me" but that's coming from someone who the entire resistance has centered around as its leader. He's probably a little tired of the idolization by now and does not like the idea that he's somehow more important than others. I think that's where that line really stems from for Leo. It's obvious that Casey isn't just talking about his importance as a leader, but Leo with the same line is asking him to set those feelings aside even if he is one of the most important people in Casey's life.

And then Leo turns around and throws one of the most important people in his life through the portal. A damn hypocrite (/positive)

EDIT: I was sort of ending it on a silly note but @dandylovesturtles added such a great point that I haven’t been able to put into words but feel in my heart when it comes to future Leo and definitely something I want to show with the healing process he’s been going through in Replica: and that’s the “not all about you” sometimes just means that bad things happen but you can’t just blame yourself for it, and it’s not some cosmic attack for your mistakes. The world did not come to an end because of Leo’s mistake, even if he might have once felt like that. What’s more it means you can’t put the whole world on your shoulder or always try to fix things on your own like how Leo tried to after Raph’s capture. It’s ok to seek the aid and support and ideas of others your trust. It really lines up so well with a lot of the events in the film.

Thank you @dandylovesturtles and everyone else’s amazing comments! I want to hear all of them and take notes.

[panlight]

Ugh, YES! I couldnt agree more!! 😭

My friends and i were talking about this the other day (about how it seems like SMeyer (and i guess Bella 🙄) seems to have such OBVIOUS favoritism towards vampires) but seeing this ask reminded me of it again and it's a good jumping point.

It's just SO hypocritical that the first thing Bella assumes with the werewolves are that they're the ones eating people, which on it's own is FINE,,, if it werent for the fact that literally the previous book we have the Cullens/vampires who DO eat people by nature (and Edward even warns her!!!) and Bella's just "idc about it" and continues to not stay away, and still vouches for them despite the fact. Its always rubbed me the wrong way from when i first read that part years back, so when Jacob calls her out on it, yknow what? your right and you should say it, Jacob. (and let's not forget that a few chapters before that scene those same werewolves SAVED you from a vampire who did want to eat you, but ok Bella!)

Not counting Edward's (and some of the Cullens') unjustified prejudice on them, the werewolves are often portrayed in the narrative to be more savage, wild and lacking in free will compared to the vampires. What really cements this for me is that scene in BD, where Edward kinda goes "unlike you, we still have our free will" on Sam(??) and it really shows how the vampires (Cullens) are kinda shown to be "better" for denying their nature but the werewolves apparently "can't". Werewolves can't deny their Alpha (being able to is the exception), vampires can always leave their coven (being unable to is the exception); werewolves have no choice on their imprint, vampires have more liberties in finding their mates (ex: Victoria and Irina see James and Laurent as their mates, but that doesn't mean the latter two see them that way/are mated to them). That moment where Jacob finally breaks free from the Alpha command would"ve been a great moment for his character, and to show that werewolves do and can be above their nature, but then Nessie happened and he's just,,,fine with that?? He doesn't even TRY to break free from his imprint, or at least not be so held down by it. How is being okay with her biting him, attending to her every need and want, a GOOD thing? Bella even describes the imprint as Jacob's own needs being SECONDARY, bc appeasing the imprintee is now your "first reflex".

((there's also the way Bella's sees the vampires treating Jacob/the werewolves as nothing more than invisible/children/infants as ""easy acceptance"" (it's not, you can literally just say they barely tolerate them, tf), AND how the Cullens just stand there and watch Bella beat Jacob (in the movie she does get physical, in the book i think she only almost does) even though just a few days ago he saved your asses, you'd think at least Carlisle would do something!! even Leah, you'd think she'd do more about how Bella broke her brother's arm than just throw "murderous glares" her way, but NOPE!! But I'll just chalk these up to the story and characters bending backwards for Bella))

Yep. And some of this is, I'm sure, subjective, and people might have read/interpreted things differently, but your take tracks a lot with me. The vibes were just that the vampires were Super Cool and Awesome and something to be envied and admired. The wolf pack was warm and fun, but they were Poor and Uncivilized and always Bella's second choice. And again, that alone isn't really a problem. She's allowed to like spending time with her boyfriend more than with her friend. And she's Born to be a Vampire so there's maybe some naturally affinity for them. Whatever. Totally fair! It's just . . . the vibes.

It's telling, too, that in the original Forever Dawn the wolfpack was just "thinly sketched" and "most of them didn't even have names." They're a second thought and like, again . . . okay! SM's allowed to be more interested in the vampires. But that sort of dismissiveness, IMO, bleeds through in the writing. Harry Clearwater's death, for example, mostly exists so Edward can have his Romeo misunderstanding and think Bella's the one who is dead. But Harry's death should MATTER much more than it does. The wolfpack is antagonistic to Leah because like "ugh a girl and she's so upset about Sam" but like HER DAD JUST DIED?!? It doesn't seem to be a factor, like SM just forgot that it would matter to Leah, and to Seth, and the whole community. She brings up Embry's parentage mystery and then just does nothing with it. Why mention it? And like, sure, she does this with the Cullens too sometimes (Alice's backstory with James might as well not have happened), but at least there's SOME follow through: Rosalie's baby obsession in Breaking Dawn relates back to her backstory, Jasper's history fighting newborns becomes relevant, as does Carlisle's past friendship with the Volturi.

And it takes on that extra edge of ". . ." because she chose to make her poor, uncivilized, no free will 'werewolves' Indigenous. I do think she probably sincerely came at this from an oblivious "I just love Native cultures!" sort of place rather than a place of malice, but she co-opts these real people and rewrites their history and legends and then also just kinds of treats them as afterthoughts and also-rans. I don't super care that she doesn't super care about the human kids, but it feels different with the Quileute characters because she used these real people.

[kroosluvr]

hi!! as a fellow royal trio-truther ive been ADORING and loving your posts so much <3 you mentioned that you've like mentally re-wired shusumi so i was curious if you had a list of head-canons for how they develop in the game/post-game!! Im super curious to hear (: also any head-canons for the akesumi dynamic would be great bc I hate how little the game developed them together !!!

OMGGGGGGGGG HAYYYYYYYYYY ok so. first. look at this (idr if i posted this here already but if i did look again heh..)

ok now ill actually talk under the cut

note that some of this is headcanon territory bc i just be frolicking at this point

some backstory i fell in love w sumi as soon as her art was revealed i was like omfg peak design PEAKKKKKK i love her so much so i was really excited abt her but i feel like there were so many loose ends w her confidant and namely her crush on protag sometimes doing her a disservice (it turned ppl off from her (understandable bc i also dislike when writers make a female character out to be dependent on a male character) but also made other ppl weird abt her in the same breath....... shivers. people who overly-romanticize/sexualize mentally ill characters (especially girls/women) freak me out sorry

anyway that put me off frm p5 fandom for a hot minute. BUT regardless. i think people often focus on like "shy cute sadgirl kouhai crush-on-protag" for her which on top of atlus's.......mediocre handling of her also does her character a disservice... shes so multilayered!! she houses such insane convoluted levels of distress and fear and anger and reluctance and most of all STUBBORNNESS. i think her headstrong personality is not really emphasized in fandom but i can totally see it (maybe its just me but).

ok moving on to my shsm delusions i think to turn sumire's canon crush on its head i want to make them doomed to never get together. i think 3rd semester is so tense and high-emotion that royal trio are so deeply intertwined w each other:

like they all are mildly-to-a-lot suicidal so they hold onto each other so tightly to make sure none of them spirals and does anything bad. i think in the end they just want the other two to be Okay, even if they themself doesn't. if the other two are ok, then it's all good.

ok back to shsm LMAO i think seeing their relationship as like an odd high-emotion situation makes sense. they love each other, obviously, and provide each other comfort, but the idea of a relationship slips thru their fingers like water. is that right...? is that how it is? like i said up there they just crumble under the weight of their own love. tldr theyre in no place to "date" each other........ but they have their "almost." they're inseparable, they love spending time with each other, but knowing in the back of their heads that it won't last, and they'll have to leave it be one day. "sometimes when i really love someone i leave them alone forever." peak shsm to me. "let's run away together - but what if it's not enough? what if all of this fear and sadness still stays? i take a man down to the river and he throws away his sadness but hes still left with his hands, he's still left with the river (paraphrased richard siken). peak shsm to me. i think they try to treat eachother so softly and gently that it fucks it all up, actually. peak shsm to me. it's not codependency in the sense that theyre not trying to save each other - they're just trying to salvage out some love from it all. all of these terrible things that happened: there's still love, right? there's still love. but the pain can't all be sifted out, and everything still hurts. but they still love. (they just don't date or even talk to each other much after graduating and i think they talk to akechi but to each other its suddenly COMPLICATED. i hate these guys)

ironically i think if you throw akechi in the mix it stabilizes out and i think shuakesumi could totally have a happy married ending. but shsm as a pair i dont see endgame for them. peak for me is that theyre in love and then they spend the rest of their lives trying to forget each other (they don't)

(If this sounds ridiculous and stupid im sorry. i just like shoving too-many-emotions onto my favs sometimes (a lot of the time))

IN REGARDS TO AKESUMI i think my latest 2 comics describe how i feel abt them pretty well!!! link 1 and link 2. actually i think akesumi's friendship is a great way for me to explore how i see/portray/feel about sumire, because i see them as way more similar than the game pays attention to. they're both stuck in their ways: sumire in her cowardice, hiding from the incident and refusing to move on, and akechi entrenched in his own traumas and feeling like he doesn't deserve more than that. their self-hatred manifests in two opposite ways but its very similar at the core. they both like. have no fucking clue what they're doing in terms of handling their pasts so that's why i think them working together to get around their own respective traumas is so fascinating: akechi is terrible at it, pushing sumire too far, but at the same time that perspective is something that she needs. meanwhile, her sensitive and observant personality shows akechi that like, you can have This too: a soft, good love. to have someone care about you unconditionally, so gently. you deserve that, too. yeah i can explode my head off now

i did not proofread this.

[loopscereal]

Pero no lo hicisteee final 100 hrs have been entered

fred by himself cause i did his shoes with everythign and the little meat texture. Why would i do that if its not mesnt to be visible? May god know cause i dont. uhh the background. yeah ok. uh Fred doesn't have to reflect Freddy in clothes or hairstyle anymore! Boys uniform! Higher, tighter pony tail! also their little jacket. Make up around their eyes, and they have gained acess to COLOR. Hes no longer restricted to shades of purple, too bad hes emo and will only branch out to red TOT. anyway yay for them. uhh uhhh also he has a new sparkle. he has a little yellowy orange sparkle in his chest, right on their tie. they didnt have that before :) new sparkle

im glad were all miserable about how fred is on the floor but also agree that freddy looks best when hes at his worse! keep up that look, youre a natural !! bbbbuhhhh

SUELTENME SUELTENME SUELTENME SUELTENME SUELTANME ok normal, hi pia :3 glad you noticed. im so diseased about when they swap colors in canon.... wughgh misery...

not so fast! theyre both so fucking bad at this game! the game being existing. Fred feeds the body and like. the most basic of maintenance but they too mistreat it in their own special way <3. ANyways how does this scene change? uh. god. i feel like it adds a lot ofc content but i dont. know. thinking about camp makes my head scream... as i imagine it mutates and changed even after having drawn these. living organism....

in my head their body "prioritizes" freddy a lot, like. IF fred is in control while freddy is sleeping, and freddy wakes up, it sorta auto-kicks fred out if they arent prepared and get caught off guard, BUT freddy isnt exctly. too present. hes not the most anchored person to his own self so if fred, can simply push him out pretty easy so long as they arent abnormally weakened, and if they were to fight for it fred will typically win. As for body auto responses, i think it does eventually kick the current pilot out, or mess things up and force them both in or both out, ("how does that work" sh sh sh dont even worry about it... <3 please.) buuuut i think it takes a long time for the body to get to that point, to the point where it does those auto responseds. Freddys gotten it pretty used to well, itself. it doesn't send out the signals that it should, or at best, not as strongly.

Okay why is Freddy all glitchy when out side and not sparkly? beeecause well. cromatic aberation occurs when a lense fails to align and focus wavelengths of color all on the same point. What the hell does that have to do with freddy? (what the hell happens int hat goddamn highschool?) uh! hes totally unfocused. in his entire self. and in his worldview, his view of strangers, of his friends, family. exc. Hes got like at least three different "lenses" he can view himself in, and at least two "good or bad" lenses he can see any given person through. IF anything is certain about him, its his instability. In idenity, in stances, in views, in beleifs, in emotions, in everything. An so, he gets the aberation efffect, cause he is !!! pulling!! apart! no focus, no stability , no alignment, no trust, no brother, no one to rely on, no money, no goals, no self esteem, no style, no shoes, no affirmation, no bitchessssssss also i have freddy at like 18 opacity (and the cromatic aberation layers are also at 1* so lets charitibly say hes at 50 total) and Fred is at like 80/85/90 on any given drawing of these, because freddy literally has less soul. uh. magic stystem or whatever freddy was emoty enough in the cup that holds his soul that he could fit a shadow, who turned into a whole ass person instead of some litttle creature...... fucked up. empty ass. anywho. enough of that miserable prick. freds got glow and sparkles cause hes got a lot of soul, hes got a lot in him, and would shine under any circumstance. stand out in some way bc hes just. like that. he is absolutly bursting at the seams with STUFF that is just not being let out. Hes curious. they wanna learn andexplre and live so fucking badly, the want to live and exist on their own terms and its so much passion and drive and will to live all bottled in this little being unable to be expresseddddd. one of these is more positive than the otherrrrr im sure theres sone negative side i missed on fred and a positive side to freddy that i missed but uh. its. 12am as i am writing and scheduling this so.....

if i had a dollar for every time i thought abt fnafhs id have 1 dollar bc i have not fucking stopped.

[alpydk]

One more prompt, and it's totally ok if you skip this one (or any that I send) if it's not your vibe!!! I really liked your ficlet on the woman who stalked Gale and engineered their relationship.

What if Gale was in a relationship at the time?

He fell for Tav because they saved his life, and convinced him life was worth living... but after some time he realizes that Tav is not his soulmate, his moon and stars. Maybe Tav changed, maybe time opened his eyes. He loves Tav, but maybe he's not *in love* with them anymore.

Then he meets someone else, and its completely different. He doesn't need someone to save him, to help him live. This new person isn't his entire world, but he is *better* when they're around. Yet he still goes home to Tav.

xoxo - 🐕

Honesty.

I went off the rails with this. Sorry OP. It sort of went with the prompt. Gale realises he's not in love with Tav ✅ He knows he doesn't need another person ✅ He goes home to Tav ✅ Angst ✅✅✅✅✅

Word Count - 3100 - CW - Angst, Not a lot of comfort. Therapy, arguing, References to Mystra

“She’s writing again,” Tav mumbled, her pointed ears caught on the sharp scratching sound of the quill in the hands of the elderly woman before her.

The black ink sank into the parchment, and Tav tried her best to read the scribbles from the distance. She couldn’t stand the way she felt judged in the small study, as if she were on a pointless trial of her own making. Gale had explained that this was for the best, that after everything that happened a year ago with tadpoles and orbs, eventually they needed to deal with it all on a deeper level. That was three sessions ago. They’d tiptoed around the actual problems that neither wanted to utter, spoken a little about their current relationship, how they were both happily married. That was before the cracks had inevitably appeared in the discussions.

Gale sighed; another simple observation stated out loud. “Yes, my love, that’s what therapists do.”

Tav was growing impatient. They’d come here so things could get better, not worse. “Are they not meant to listen and ask questions?”

“Well, not all of them have an eidetic memory as you do,” he swiftly replied.

She sucked in a breath, trying to keep her composure. Too many times he had made insults masked as compliments, too smart for his own good and hoping she wouldn’t take offense at them. “See, this is what I was talking about. Passive aggressive.”

The therapist lowered the quill and turned to the pair, her voice slow and calm, the lilt of a faint accent making her sound trustworthy despite no evidence to confirm it. “Hm, you have used the term before. And how does that make you feel when Gale speaks to you in that way?”

Slumping her shoulders, Tav answered. Another ridiculous question asking her about her feelings, like any of it even mattered. She was paying. She simply wanted the answers on how to fix things and then to go back to the tower and indulge in his body, just like they had when they’d first arrived in the city. The inquisitive eyes of the therapist watched her like a hawk, every subtle gesture, every subconscious reflex. She had to answer, even if she didn’t like it. She was paying, after all. “Like I’m inferior or something. ‘Eidetic memory’ – Why can’t he just say it like a normal person?”

Gale interjected quickly, a knee jerk reaction in the defence of literature and intellect. “At the academy, such verbiage would be considered ‘normal’.”

“At the academy, of course,” she uttered distastefully.

The quill was raised once again. “Tav, do you have an issue with Gale’s place of occupation?”

She tried to get comfortable on the leather chair, the wooden back designed for someone who spent long hours indoors and not someone who’d spent many a year travelling forest trails and getting bruised in battle. “No... Maybe? It’s where he met his... um, how would I describe her? His ex?”

How was she supposed to answer the question? Blackstaff, the place he had wanted to work, to teach. The place where Mystra had entered his life and made him the man who sat beside her today. Was she okay with him being there each day, knowing that the Goddess watched over all who commanded the Weave? At any moment Gale could be taken again, could choose to leave again.

“And you worry he may go back to her?”

The question was an innocent one, but a gateway to the insecurities Tav had tried to bury long ago. It was difficult to understand the relationship between a mortal and a god: the power dynamics that came into play, the age differences, the span of time that passed outside of the mortal realms. Eighteen months were the blink of an eye for an elf, but for a god, they were most likely a grain of sand in the cosmos. She pondered over the question, turning it in her mind, trying to work out how the topic could be focussed more on his previous relationship than that of their current one. “Well, it’s complicated. He’s never really got over her.”

“My love, I believe I was quite clear when I stated that with you, I forget all about her.”

Tav remembered that night all too well, the conjured boat ride across astral seas, the words that came from his flush lips so poetically before they had made love under the eyes of the gods. She had believed them wholeheartedly, each syllable. It had only been later that the doubts had risen, as magic continued to play a role in their life, as Mystra’s name had come up accidentally during the throes of passion. The Goddess was never far away from their minds. “Oh, come on. How does a person even forget a relationship like that? She was your first love; you were with her for a millennium, at least.”

The rising tensions were quickly picked up, the conversation diverted back despite the tense participant’s readiness to argue. “Do you compare yourself often to his ex, Tav?”

“Why are you asking me all the questions?" she was quick to snap back, her eyes fixed on Gale. "I’m not the problem here,”

“Hm. You believe the problem lies with Gale and this previous relationship?”

What a stupid question. That’s all it ever came down to. Gale and Mystra, the orb. Everything that bitch had done to him, and how he would always be in her palm. “Exactly. And then he does all this reading, starts telling me about co-dependency and stuff. Just feels like unless the world is ending, we’ve nothing in common.”

“I merely stated that perhaps our initial courting was a little hurried.” He was aware of the reading; of the topic he had broached to her in the hopes it would spark a conversation about their lack of communication. He didn’t want to admit that he’d made a mistake in rushing into marriage with her. Four months of intense desperate nights fuelling the need to start living after so long planning to die.

“Well, apologies for not being able to bend time and space.”

Another dig at his Goddess, another remark that he placed with the rest. They were there to be honest with one another, but just as was Tav’s way, she went on the attack. The best defence was a good offence, and it had been that way ever since the goblins at the grove. Gale went to object but was cut off before the words managed to escape him, a moment of gratitude as another repeated argument was prevented.

The calming voice settled over the room, the need to move on clear to them both. “Maybe we can get back on track. In your last session, we were discussing your anniversary. You said it had not gone entirely to plan. What exactly happened?”

Tav forcefully turned to the therapist, sitting straight as if she were a student in school seeking a gold star for behaviour. “His mother came by.”

“You agreed that she could,” Gale remarked, quick to not be painted as the enemy in the tale.

“Yeah, to keep you happy.”

“Why didn’t you just say-”

Tav had been preparing for this fight, the words scripted and prepared to show that it had been his mother, his relationship, that had ruined everything. She was innocent and had only been the polite, dutiful wife. “You wanted her there. She’s your mother, after all.”

Gale shook his head; the act so fake he was almost insulted she would try it in front of him. “Tav, we both know of your dislike for my mother. You’ve never been the best at holding your tongue when it comes to the matters of my family.”

She pursed her lips, irritated that her previous actions had caught her out. The quill scratched the paper again. More notes about Tav’s failings, she was sure. “Fine then. What was the point of me saying anything? You would’ve just explained to me how family relationships were and integral part of marriage and blah blah blah”

“They are. Research has shown that-”

Cutting him off before he could continue, she spoke insistently to the therapist, hoping to make her case. “See. This is why I don’t bother. Anyway, Morena showed up, made snide comments about how I looked and again, he just let it go.”

“This happens often?”

“Not as often as Tav makes out.” Gale had few people in life of whom he would choose to protect. He had believed that Tav would always be one of them, but as she placed the attack on his own mother, he couldn’t help but feel the anger burning deep inside.

The words slipped out, Tav's mind and body ready to confront him fully. “Mummy’s boy...”

The remark did not go unheard by him, one which she had mumbled in the past as she had retired to the library with a glass of wine in hand. “Apologies. What was that I just heard?”

The ink on the parchment could become a full novel for all she cared at that point, the session one which had needed to happen after so many months of passive comments and trying to play the perfect couple. “Now I know why you were interested in her. Looking for another mother to take care of you.”

“'Her'? His ex, I’m assuming?” The therapist asked curiously. Despite the tension in the air, they were reaching the heart of the matter.

“She was nothing like my mother,” Gale hissed, the comparison between the two abominable in his mind. Tav had stooped to a new low and he could feel his heart pounding as the woman he loved became someone he barely recognised.

The smallest smirk came to her lips as she heard him and knew exactly how to reply. “You wouldn’t describe your ex as inimitable and unavoidable?”

It was rare that she could catch him using his own descriptions and phrases, but on this occasion, she had. Eidetic, indeed. “Well... unavoidable goes without saying, and maybe I would have described Mys- Melissa as inimitable at some point as well, but that’s besides the point.”

“Melissa is also an older woman too, I’m assuming?”

“Understatement there,” Tav muttered under her breath, interested to see where this would go now that Gale’s relationship was finally in the spotlight.

Black ink flowed once again. “And out of curiosity, how old are you, Tav?”

She didn’t like what was insinuated in the question. “Two hundred and twenty-six, but I’m an Elf. It’s different.” She was nothing like Mystra. What was two hundred years when compared to a few thousand? So, he was in his thirties, but that was an adult and practically the same as she was in some ways. What was age in this regard? “You’re writing again.”

“Merely notes.” Soft eyes were moved between the pair. “Gale. When you met Tav. What drew you to her?”

He took a deep breath, trying to relax after the earlier outburst. It had been some time since he had lost his temper, and he refused to let it happen in the company of a stranger. “That is quite difficult to go into detail about. We were in a rather unorthodox situation, fighting for our lives-”

“Figuratively I presume?”

“But of course,” he answered with an uncomfortable chuckle. “And Tav, as you have probably determined, is a particularly strong-willed woman. A quality that I certainly desired, no... needed at the time.”

The therapist slowly nodded, an understanding in what he had said. “Would you say you still need that quality?”

Gale didn’t know how to respond. If he was honest, it was not something he needed, at least not in the way Tav provided. Over the year, her strong will had become almost controlling, and he’d found himself no longer seeing her as the one to be devoted to, worshipped. He now saw her as he saw Mystra, someone he loved, but could not give himself to any longer. “I... That’s not something... I love Tav.”

“That’s clear.”

“But it may be possible that I am not in love with Tav.”

It was as if the air had been sucked out of the room, the words heavy. They carried a weight that Tav had not been ready to hear, even if deep down she already knew and felt them herself. She, too, loved Gale, but no longer with the desperation she once had.

“And what’s that supposed to mean?” Her question felt hollow, pointless.

“My love.” It felt so fickle to call her that, and yet he continued. “You must realise we are not the same people we were but a year ago. We’ve changed, grown into our own. I have grown.”

“And what? Now you don’t need me?” Thoughts swirled and burst in her mind. An idea that she had been used, that she had used him, that she wasn’t good enough, that she had made the wrong choice, that she had pushed him away. The guilt, the self-loathing, it hurt too much and, as she had always done before, she lashed out. Attack and survive. “Gods, I was stupid, wasn’t I? That’s all it ever is to you, isn’t it? Just constant ambition. If you’re not getting something out of the relationship, then it’s worthless to you. Mystra - sorry Melissa -, and now me.”

“Tav...”

She rose to her feet, the conversation over before she could do any more damage. She didn’t care that the therapist was trying to cool down the two of them, didn’t care that the Goddess’ name had been uttered, that divine eyes would be watching them yet again. “Don’t Tav me. At least I now know where I stand.”

“Just sit back down. Let’s discuss this, and maybe we can work through it.” As Gale spoke, he couldn’t hide the slither of hope in his voice, that maybe she would leave. That he could finally break the cycle of needing and wanting. He could learn to be comfortable in his own skin, using the tools that Tav had given him so long ago. No longer trying to prove himself to the world around him, but simply being. One last attempt was made, a reminder of better times under aurora painted skies at the forefront of his mind. “We could go back to how we once were.”

Tav shook her head, an anger, an acceptance in her quivering voice. She had to let him go, for both their sakes. “I can’t be that person to you. Not anymore.”

Empty words drifted through the open door as she left, existing simply for the sake of existing. “Tav, don’t leave me... Tav...”

---

Gale’s walk home was slow, a heavy weight in his chest similar to a deep grief which he could not shake. The tower loomed in the distance and the dread he felt seemed to grow just as the grey bricks on the horizon. Love, but not in love. A cycle of needing and wanting. Being. Maybe it was not grief he felt, but fear at what was to come. To be alone and love himself rather than rely on someone else. To find comfort in himself when he had known none before.

He lingered in the doorway to the bedroom, watching as Tav threw various items of clothing across the floor towards an open bag. “You’re quick to pack.”

Slumping down on the edge of the bed, she held a white shirt in her hands, focussing on the ruffles between her fingertips. “Figured I’d head back to Baldur’s Gate, stay at the Elfsong. There’s that guy who owes me a drink.”

Gale entered the room, choosing to sit beside her and looking at the pile of mismatched clothing on the floor. Some pieces she had arrived with, others he had bought her. Now he would no longer see her in any of them. “Of course there is...”

“Don’t give me that,” she scorned. “This was your fault.”

“My-” Over a year of bad habits tried to force through. “Tav, you cannot be so blind as to have not seen this coming. The arguments, the silence that followed, the nights where we both longed to be apart.”

“Yeah, but I hoped we would get through it, that I was enough for you.”

 “You were.”

“But not anymore.”

Her words hurt, but he couldn’t deny the truth any longer, not after all of it had been exposed. The therapy would not be enough, the lies would continue, he would be in her palm forever if he chose. He needed to set them both free and hoped she would understand. “Now...now I need to learn to stand on my own two feet. You were right, after all. So long as others offer me something, I’ll continue to take. I’ll continue to long for more.”

“And if I want to offer you more?”

He saw the hope in her eyes, the unspoken promises that she would give him everything if only he continued to love her, but he had been down that lonely path before and he could no longer pretend. “Then you’re no different to Mystra.”

The words cut like daggers, so final, as if carved deeply in her heart. There was such certainty, a strength in Gale’s eyes, Tav had seen so rarely before. Sadness, anger, guilt. So many emotions pushed themselves upon her, but merged among them was a sense of pride in him and what he was doing. She’d only ever wanted what was best for him, and if this was it, then so be it.

“Then I guess this is it.”

He watched as the bag was filled, as the brown leather began to pad out with the addition of clothes, a white ruffled shirt, a red dress, a white gold ring she’d sworn never to remove. As she left for the door, he called out to her.

She glanced up at him, her footsteps halted, her heartbeat quickening that maybe this had all been a mistake, a nightmare she would soon wake from.

Gale approached her, taking her soft hand in the protective warmth of his own. “Maybe another night, in a distant future of conjured stars, things could be different. I could be the man you once saw me as.”

A cold weight was placed in her Tav’s palm, Gale’s own wedding band heavy as he closed her fingers around it. He looked at her with such love, just as he had under eternal night skies, over woven seas, on sunlit docks. Maybe another night.

[neverchecking]

Um hi I am 🪷 From clouds Page and I wanted to be it on here if it ok

I just wanted to say I really love your work

And I have a huge question It not a requests but a ask

I am autistic high functioning one but it still hard to do things that you don't understand and you have to have yours comer plushy

I have one and even though I am in my Earl 20's I am crying like a baby over my plushy I had snic I was a kid it a cute Pokemon one and it a cute little mew doll and my rabbit and stuff dog. But the got torn up by my sister dog and they are trying to fix it

What would the link boy do

I know sage would try a fix it with touch stuff that the reader would like. Also I just know the gop that is on the itam look so soft and like slim I would beIN playing with it for so long

So my question is how would the boys fix it or think of the reade beIN so over stimulated and can't stop crying and can't cop with out her stuff plushies and would they make a smiler one until the fix it

I know four would quickly get the plushy fix and time with the song of time

And fd is a god he can use powers but the others I am confused on

Sage would be using his hand

Sorry for the long question I am just in a stage of cleaning down and trying to wait for my other plushy.

FROM 🪷Aron p.s I am not good at spelling and my autocorrect is a meany

Hello 🪷anon! Don't worry, I know who you are! Your request is currently a work in progress! You totally can be 🪷anon!

I'm so sorry about what happened to your plushy. I totally understand as I'm nineteen, almost twenty, and have my own comfort plush. I know I would be absolutely devastated if anything happened to her (Her name is Princess and she's a pink poodle :)). I can't imagine what it would be like for someone with Autism. I'm not nearly as educated on the spectrum or what it entails, but I know a disturbance like that can be especially hard. (Please take no offence to what I'm saying, I'm trying not to make this sound as bad as its coming out.)

Now, Time, contrary to how he looks, does know how to sew. He's not exceptional at it, but it's certainly passible. Sure, it's a little wonky, maybe crooked, but it's evident that he put a lot of effort into it. While it's a work in progress however, or after the initial incident, he remains a steady rock for you! If your okay with physical touch during this time, he's holding you to his chest and humming a soft tune under his breath while gently rocking back and forth. If not, he's counting breaths in front of you, tapping off his fingers to help you regulate.

Twilight cannot sew. Point, blank, period. His hands are too clumsy and his movements too rough for the thin, fragile string. However, he knows people who can. If your near Ordon, he's asking Ilia or Uli. If not, he'll take it to a tailor in the nearby village. If your not near a village, he's sucking up his ego and asking Legend. His pelt is always available if you need it, but so are his arms. Lemme tell you, he gives the best hugs. If you don't wanna hug him, that's fine, maybe Wolfie will make you feel better? If you don't want any contact, that's just as okay! Wolfie with sit with you until you feel better!

Sky is tricky because while he can play the harp/lyra/whatever that thing is, I can't say I see him being able to sew. His hands are too used to the thick sturdiness of wood or the gentle plucking of the strings. The repetitive motions confuse him and he just knots the string over and over again. He doesn't wait to ask Legend or Time however, and he'll even use tears to get what he wants. Like Twilight, his sail cloth is always available to you, and he also gives pretty good hugs. If you want your space, he's pulling out his latest project and working on it beside you, hoping the repetitive noises and motions help you ground yourself.

Now, Wars can't sew well either. But he can. He's not going to put your biggest comfort item at risk for that. He's not sucking up to Legend however. No, he'll instead hand over the needed dough to the nearest Tailor or, hell, even Time to get it done as quickly as possible. His scarf is also always available. It's a good way to ground yourself as he'll sit with one end, wrapping and intertwining it around his fingers and urging you to follow.

Legend, my lovely little rat, is the best at sewing hands down. He'll remain by your side, letting you take whatever comfort needed (Physical or otherwise), while he sews your comfort item back to its rightful state. He won't shoot any quips, nor even have a harsh tone with you and anyone who dares to even try and tease you are gifted with a dirty glare.

Wild cannot sew. Period. He'll also bribe Legend with food of some sort or some ancient tech to do it for him while keeping you distracted with food prep. You don't even have to do anything, but sit there and look pretty. If you want physical comfort, sucks for the rest of the chain because they are now on their own for dinner as you become priority number one.

Hyrule can sew! With resources as scarce as they are in his world, he had to learn to preserve what he had. Which included repairing his tunics, pants, boots, etc., etc.. So, he jumps at the opportunity to fix your comfort item. It's done pretty well too! Now, Hyrule probably uses some sort of Fairy magic to calm you, through touch or otherwise, and also hums to keep you grounded.

Four can also sew! He'd fix it up right away! In fact, he'd probably split to speed up the process. One of the colors, probably Vio, would sew the item easily and quickly while the others worked on comforting you. Cuddles? Done. You wanna hear them sing? Give them a song, darling. You just want your space to process your emotions? They're steering the others away. And then, when they combine to give you back the object, Four doesn't leave until he's certain your doing okay again. :)

Wind (This is entirely platonic) cannot sew. But, he's the youngest, so he can use puppy dog eyes and get Legend or Hyrule or Time to bend to his will and do it for him. He is then either distracting you with a game or adventure or small hike, or sitting with you and telling you all sorts of stories about his journey as a pirate.

Sage can sew! He learned after his original Champion's tunic had taken one too many hits and he refused to ask Natura (His Zelda) to fix it, or use the one she was dead set on him using. Of course, he could also use his hand to help, using Recall if the incident is recent enough. If it's not, he's more than happy to fix it himself. He's offering you his hand to take should you want it, using it to pull you into his lap if that's acceptable in the situation. If not, he's sitting with you. He's all too aware of what's it's like to be so...overstimulated, so he's not asking anything. Not humming or singing. Just sitting and acting like an anchor for you.

Fierce Deity can't sew. He can use powers to an extent, but he mostly has to use his scary dog privileges to get a tailor to fix it. He's built like a tank and has a core like a furnace though, so he's perfect for cuddles. If you wanna sob into his chest, he won't do anything but shield you from the view of others. He's another one to offer silent comfort rather than any form of conversation.

Bonus! First can sew! Not badly, nor too well, but it's average. He's humming lowly while fixing the object before giving it to you. He's brushing your knuckles before pressing a kiss to them, tapping your breaths along each bump when he pulls away. His scarf is also available to you. Whatever you need, darling.

I really hope this makes you feel a bit better 🪷anon! I tried using the little bit of knowledge I had to make this as good as it can be. I wish you all the best and wish I could've gotten to this sooner.

With all my love,

Cinder XOXO

[imaginespazzi]

Wowza, I have a LOT of thoughts and feelings about part 7. A real mixed bag. BUCKLE UP.

2033

yaaay they had a sleep over that didn't end absolute destruction of our collective hearts!

I feel the storm a brew'in with Drew. Something is coming and its not gonna be good lol.

Stephie’s quiet for a second, hiccoughing to herself as she searches for something on Paige’s face before she holds out a pinky, “promise you’ll never leave?” oof. my gut. is punched.

Paige is terrified. hmmm ok I like were getting into Paige's psyche a little more. Unlike other anons I don't think she's going to straight up run away or something drastic like that, but I think its totally fair that now that they are over the 'hump' (even though there has been no humping :( ) of admitting their feelings and trying to build something new, it is sinking in for Paige that wow this could be amazing… or I could get my heart trampled again and combust into a million pieces if this dream doesn't work out

Paige laughs, tucking that little tidbit away to tease Azzi with later, “how about you and I go get your Mama her favorite coffee?” oh I love this domestic shit. Paige would be the kind of sweet lover girl to go out and get her woman her favorite coffee even if theres coffee already in the house

Hmmm when is Jose's wedding happening? Will Paige be Azzi's date? Will being at a wedding give her a PTSD trauma response? I normally love weddings but i feel like you aint gonna give us a fluff fest with this one. Or maybe Azzi and Paige have a wonderful romantic time and start talking about what they want to do for their own wedding. happy happy happy fluff yay.

OOoh lawd is Paige gonna let an 'i love you' slip and freak Azzi out

“your daughter has you wrapped around her little finger huh?” “yeah, yeah she does.” SOBBING. But for real by the time Stephie is a teenager Azzi is going to have to impose a monthly limit on how much Paige can spend on random shit for Stephie cause she would be rollin up to school in a G-wagon and a louis v backpack and get mugged/become insufferable lol.

“I got you an iced vanilla latte with extra whipped cream,” foreshadowing smut with Paige putting whipped cream on azzi's nips? yes? great.

“Sounds good,” Paige confirms, “we’ll be there!” - awwww cutie paige. Couple mode.

But there’s something about being a secret again, that raises a bitter taste of what killed us then could kill us now in her mouth. hmmmm this is interesting. I often forget about the fact that their first relationship was a secret, and how clearly there is an element of that involved in their breakup. Azzi pulling back again? Im getting sad.

dun dun dun dun the moment we've been waiting for - FRENCHIE!

Hmm ok so Stephie doesn't seem to know clem was not just a platonic friend for Azzi… wondering if its cause they weren't in a serious relationship and it was just FWB or if it was a full blown relationship and Azzi consciously hid it from stephie

I mean Im sure Paige hates clemence already for obvious reasons, but STEPHIE loving her……ohhhhh lawd

Oof ok Clemence traded to atlanta… glad we dont have to have her around for long. I dont want paige to be arrested for homicide. Also Im absolutely picturing Clemence looking like Marine Johannes cause we know Azzi's type is white blond haired blue eyed Guards lol

“just one night.” I feel this night out is going to be an alcohol fueled disaster and IM SO EXCITED

2028

Why isn't Azzi playing for team USA? Stephie was born in January so could she not theoretically be back in it by now? Or did she take 2 seasons off?

OK Olivia. You know I love the whole Olivia of it all and I find the relationship so intriguing and complex. My first instincts about her in this chapter were of course, dear god she is such a bitch. And then I have to remind myself SHES NOT. She is just kind of a dumbass who is in love with someone who isn't in love with her, and its pretty much torturing her. -- “You did it,” Olivia screams, running into Paige’s arms as friends and family start to gather on the court, “I’m so proud of you!” “Thanks Olivia-” Paige is about to say more like… you are congratulating your wife on her winning a game at the Olympics and she can't even get out a full sentence in response cause she SEES the back of her ex girlfriends head. Thats grounds for divorce right there lol.

eeeek i dont like confrontation this would make me pee my pants "“Oh I don’t know about that,” Olivia says airily, sharp nails digging a little too roughly into Paige’s skin as her grip tightens further, “there’s plenty of talent up and coming in the next 4 years.”

"This is a side of Olivia that Paige is only just beginning to unveil, the side of Olivia that makes snide bitchy comments with a saccharine voice." … hmmm just starting to reveal? so theyve been married for like 8 months at this point. Olivia was keeping up a facade for a while ….. or Paige's clear preference for azzi is just getting worse and worse and the woman is finally cracking.

Ok the image of Olivia being LIVID in their hotel room, and Paige is just laying in bed watching tiktoks not listening to a thing Olivia says. Why is Olivia still here?! Take the money and run bitch your wife aint that into you!

gazing down at her phone where another fuckass Clézzi edit has started to play "fuckass clezzi edit' HHAHAHAHAH this is so Paige

Another thing about Olivia is that she seems to have a real issue with Basketball despite you know, being a sports reporter and pursuing a player romantically?? When Paige and her have that post presser spat in the earlier chapter Olivia says something like "There are other jobs than playing basketball" and here again she goes "right, fucking basketball. again". Sorry Olivia but your house, luxury cars, jewelry, are all courtesy of the fact that your wife is a basketball player! Who you met... while she was a basketball player! -OK Olivia, not going to the gold medal game? Bitch gots to go. How did this marriage continue for 2 more years lol

Azzi’s eyes soften, “I came for you. I don’t know if I’m allowed to say that but- I’m here for you.” ok and im crying again. Just get back together right here and now you fools.

I do have a short addition to the end of the chapter, ahem im a little rusty:

And they both know that they’re saying words they shouldn’t say. That when they break apart from this moment, they’ll have to walk away. But for now, being in each other’s arms is the only thing that feels right, that feels golden. Except, at the afterparty their eyes meet again. Olivia had gone back to Dallas in a huff instead of staying for closing ceremonies. Clemence had to go be French somewhere, and didn't want to celebrate the USA win. And despite both being in relationships, the pull towards each other they felt was undeniable. After a couple dirty shirleys, Azzi followed Paige to her now empty suite. Once inside Paige opened a bottle of champagne, realized it was from France, and threw the bottle out the window. She then opened a Budweiser, poured it over azzis tits, chugged he rest of it, and they made passionate and patriotic love. As Paige buried her face in Azzis pussy, sucking on her clit like a goddamn AMERICAN, Azzi chanted 'USA USA USA'! She was reminded how much she loved Paige's Red Blooded American passion. Sure, sex with Clem was nice. But she was always stopping in the middle to bring out a cheese plate, and some preserves, or some croissants that got crumbs all over the place. While they both seemed to understand this was a one time thing, Azzi and Paige felt the Olympic spirit erupting within them, that it was fate they they connected here in LA, and released the tension they had been bottling up for 4 years. As they both squirted simultaneously, it was reminiscent of old faithful, another classic American relic. What a night it was. 🤱🤱🤱🤱🤱🤱🤱🤱🤱🤱🤱🤱

Buckling up m'am!

Paige is rightfully apprehensive about a lot of things. I think with her, when she was trying to convince Azzi, she's wasn't thinking about more than just being together. Now that they are taking step towards that, Paige is starting to have an epiphany of "hey there were actual reasons why we haven't been together for the last 8 years and maybe I needa think about those just a little bit".

The wedding will happen on-page and there's two ways it could go. I haven't fully decided yet so it's just as much a mystery to me I guess.

LMFAO Paige is just gonna give that girl an amex card and let her go ham with it if she gets her way

I'm glad you caught that line!

A lot of people seemed to think Clémence looks like Marine Johannes which is lowkey what I pictured as well and so I'm very amused that we all seem to be on the same wavelength with that lmao

I don't think she took two seasons off because she's definitely playing in the 2028 W season but with Stephie having been born only a couple months ago, I think Azzi, as a single mother, prioritized Stephie over going to Olympic training camps and stuff and so she wasn't on the team.

She is just kind of a dumbass who is in love with someone who isn't in love with her, and its pretty much torturing her. - this is exactly it like she's in a very depressing situation if we look at it through non-pazzi tinted glasses

Olivia is holding onto a dream that's threatening to turn into a nightmare and I don't think even she could tell you why she's holding on except for this ridiculous things called hope.

It's easier to take her anger out on Paige's love for basketball than take it out on Paige's love for Azzi that they're both trying to pretend doesn't exist anymore.

JESUS FUCKING CHRIST BABES!

I just- throwing out the champagne cause it's french? the beer? USA USA USA chanting? cheese plates?

No notes, 10/10 perfection. Please take over my writing credentials.

[mrsnancywheeler]

Hi hi hi ok ok so like, ive been obsessed eoth Phoebe Bridgers recently while writing my own song and stuff since i get to write a report on like a bunch of different artists for college and im including her in it.

But what i cane to say is that Billy and muse FULLY remind me of Moon Song.

More specifically the lines

"You couldn't have. You Couldn't have. Stuck your tongue down the throat of somebody. Who loves you more. So i'll wait for the next time you want me. Like a dog with a bird in its mouth"

Like i dont know of it makes sense?? But like it just reminds me of them because of the fact that like this part of the song is practically talking about the denial of the idea of someone wanting another. Like, the relationship is unsteady and theres always that chance that someone else will come along (in this case other groupies) who would take away that attention or love or what ever it is. And then the dog analogy too?? Because the verse ends with a 'mm' to replicate the sound of a dogs whimper and begging to just get loved by another. Like the dog is a sign of trying to stay loyal, trying to stay devoted even going as far as bringing back a token to win what was had before back into their life (the bird).

AND AND THEN THERES THE LINES OF

"But now I am dreaming. And your singing at my birthday. And ive never seen you smile so big"

Like she's litterally trying to imagine things where better than they are. But in relation to Billy and muse, i fully interpret this line as muse's naivety at the very VERY beginning of it all and before that cycle starts back up. Like she's imagining things will be okay, things will work out and that it was 'just this once' or something like that.

But then theres also the line:

"But you're holding me like water in your hands"

Basically aluding to the fact that every time Bully has betrayed muses trust, it causes that break to happen and for her to fall apart all over again, just like water would when someone tries to hold it, it falls through the cracks and pours out of the palms.

Im probably like thinking wayyy too much into this but like I just wanted to share my thoughts haha. Also love your writing, like i cant express how many nights ive soent just re reading and re reading because my god it is so good. Anyways bye byeee

YES THIS IS SO REAL (again I'm humbly asking for forgiveness for taking so long 🥺)

muse knows very quickly that there will always be other girls, groupies, that he'll use to make him feel like he's not tied down, that he hasn't shared his feelings with someone, his love. and she's desperate for him not too, to put it behind her when he shows any morsel of wanting him. and whenever things have been good and she can slowly see him falling into old habits after saying something he feels is to revealing, too commiting, she's desperate for him not too. she gets clingier, tries to praise him more, offer him more sexual favors, anything to try and stop him. but one, her trying so hard shows she cares which reminds billy why he loves her and he doesn't want to think about that, two she's not letting him detach easily which makes it an annoyance, and three it's easier to snap than to admit wrongdoing. muse really does remind me of a puppy dog, coming around with big puppy dog eyes, snuggling up begging to be pet, whimpering for attention, any bone thrown she'll fetch and bring back.

muse totally convinces herself the first few times that it was just once, well a couple missteps, but it'll be alright. there's a whole future of good things, right? and he feeds enough into the illusion that the picture is almost complete before he starts to tear the photo up.

yes, yes, yes, eventually the water will slip through every crack possible, leaving only droplets also searching for escape, it might not happen quickly, but he provides the cracks and even if she's desperate to stay, each meltdown brings her closer to emptying his hands.

i love it when y'all think into it, it's so beautiful to have a community to overanalyze things with the silly little characters I've created in these universes, and I love it 💋 thank you so much for sharing, and that's literally the highest compliment. stuff like that keeps me writing because I'm so glad you can find enjoyment in it and re read and re read, I'm glad to share my thoughts and for them not to just be mine. bye!! ❤️

[melissa-titanium]

the ask game stuff..001 for N nd doll (giggles

GO FUCK YOURSELF . but thank uou... anime berdly emoji . ill answer...FOR NOW

001 | send me a ship and I will tell you:

when I started shipping it if I did: VERY RECENTLY ACTUALLY id say within the last like two weeks. ive always loved doll and always loved n but then i realized like. oh huh i connect alot with n and want to make out with doll . boom. its like borderline selfship at this point its cringe as fuck but let me do whatever i want.

my thoughts: surprisingly i don't have as many thoughts on them as i did but i feel like. because of how much of a foil doll is to uzi i think thats the word it would be like. IDK i feel like for doll it'd help to understand the 'humanity' of the dds. if she witnesses a disassembly drone killing war machine trip over his own tail or bump his head into a doorframe and wince and laugh and talk and hug with gentle arms and do things that she specifically reprogrammed herself NOT to do so she'd have a better chance to kill her worst enemy and avenge her parents... she would short circuit. to actually get to the point of not killing him on sight would take a while or lots of coercing via ... lizzy? or hell maybe even uzi im not sure. unless they had an individual encounter (which, you know, could totally happen! doll out in the wastes and n is on a solo hunt, you know her ass was following them.) that lead to a stalemate, i'm not sure how they'd even meet. HM OK NOW IM THINKING ABOUT THIS. either way tho n has a habit of befriending insane drones (or like... smoochin depending on how you see enzi tho i see them as platonic) and i think he could. Not fix her but he could be there for her bless. and again i think she could help him be not a doormat 💛 also stupid hc i had aboit them i hv always thought doll to have like... a freakishly good memory. which, works perfectly paired with n because like .you know. his memory prahblems . dolls ass can remember the angle of your arm when you were like fucking sitting on a chair on the 13th of april last year or some shit like she PAYS ATTENTION even if she doesn't often share her input... which is also a good thing bcos n is super inclusive always. n voice DOLLLL LOOK WE ARE DOING A THING!!!! :D & shes just like. sighs okay (comes ova 2 him) and eventually.. i think itd get to the point where she can go do shit on her own without being explicitly invited YAY

What makes me happy about them: gotta bring up the Me & My Wife shit again bcos its borderline selfship at this point. i just think its interesting and awesome I REALLY HOPE THEY HAVE AN INTERACTION... tho i doubt it; i think they might fight or smt in ep 7 WHICH HONESTLY I WOULDNT BE SAD ABOUT my goil needs moe screenrtime

What makes me sad about them: doll probably hasnt experienced like. affection in fucking ages & frankly n really hasnt either. i think they'd hold hands and talk about their kill counts. also i just realized they both kind of went thru a period of time tht was little socialization only KILL. doll had school & lizzy, sure, but also living in an apartment with ur parents' & dozens of others' corpses its like. tht fucks w u. but the interesting thing about them is… n and doll don't experience guilt over Killing And Eating People the same way i think. like. just for example v and uzi do (atleast in my perception). like v couldnt cope with the knowledge she had so she fell extra EXTRA hard into her role (atleast using her maid self as an accurate portrayal of her old self) and uzi has never ever experiuenced anything like that before so its fucking terrifying to her. however, with doll and n… they dont percieve it the same way. we understand that both of them are capable of guilt but it takes a very strong connection for them to experience it. ep one; n feels bad for making uzi argue with khan & ruining the card game. does he say a single thing about killing and eating half a dozen workers? No! because it's natural to him. there's nothing out of the ordinary in that situation except for the fact that he was "rude" by interrupting someone & "rude" by causing an argument. yes, he's very sweet and patient and all of the above but he doesn't see killing as really a BAD THING… he sees it as a necessity; as him being useful, higher numbers means hes doing a good job. but, really, that's all he's known. he doesn't remember being a worker. after meeting uzi he's capable of realizing… oh, these are living creatures! i feel a little bad now. but the guilt doesn't come crashing down onto him and leave him utterly devastated at his kill count, it just sits there. it festers. similarly, in my opinion, to how doll reacts to guilt. we see her as this unstoppable force at every point until the end of promening. she knows her goals, she knows what she has to do to get to them, and has shaped herself into the perfect killing machine to do what she needs, removing all forms of guilt from her person to make sure it doesn't get in the way. though, again, it comes bubbling to the surface back from where she buried it so deeply under all her anger when uzi pops her emo little head in. she isnt instantly all "oh my god, what have i done?" but it eats away at her all of this fucking time, she has been killing and hurting her kind, believing she was the only one who could possibly shoulder this burden and deal justice to those who deserved it. but now that she knows she isn't alone… it festers.

things done in fanfic that annoys me: i've seen like three n/doll fics literally EVER but i'd honestly say. major mischaracterization of doll... i feel like doll gets mischaracterized more than n? n's behaviours are easy to understand and read with a surface level understanding because he has more screentime and again ON THE SURFACE looks relatively simple. i think a huge thing in some fanfics that bugs me is that. imitation of speech patterns = perfect characterization WHICH IS NOT TRUE... but also understandably makes it difficult to do with doll because she doesn't talk alot, while N talks a LOT so it leads to a heavy imbalance in mischaracterization. just because the characters would fucking say that, doesnt mean they would Fucking Do That

apparently there is a word limit on tumblr. pleasantly surprised this will be two posts instead

[luce-speaks]

Hi pal! I sent over a passage for director's commentary on Laid To Rest Chapter 4, I'd love to hear your thoughts! :3

i've never watched a DVD director's commentary so i actually don't know what's supposed to go here. i have taken the opportunity to be incredibly long-winded (what else is new). enjoy!

to preface: these are screenshots directly from the original google doc! every major writing project i work on starts in the notes app for drafting, then moves to google docs for editing. once in the google doc, it gets its own background color to help me tell them apart. laid to rest is green for forsyth!

forsyth’s inability to just “do nothing” is a running theme in this story (not to mention something i personally relate to), and this is totally one of those moments. it’s a nice contrast to python, who is great at doing nothing and generally thinks forsyth needs to get better at it.

python has no reason to believe that forsyth even has a book with him. he just says things. forsyth’s answer is also a hint that this story happens before the forsyth and lukas support.

i had a whole talk with my beta reader about this bit and "sir ghost", because forsyth, as a very proper aspiring knight, would not be inclined to use the title incorrectly! but there wasn’t anything good to replace it with (“mister ghost” sounds weirdly anachronistic and a little british), and i didn't want to take it out, so it stuck anyway. the line about forsyth being relieved was basically a retcon fix to that issue! also, i think it’s funny how much python hates the nickname...

…and how quickly forsyth switches to ‘oh, no, sir is only for knights’. forsyth doesn’t see the irony here. i do.

python has no idea how much the stealing comment offends forsyth, but if he did, he’d say it anyway. i don’t think the same goes for the second insult—it’s very personal to forsyth, and it might be a bridge too far for him. but he has no idea, so he just goes ahead with it! also in this part: i wanted lukas’s presence to be felt as a character even though he wasn’t around for most of the story. in this case, we see how forsyth looks up to him for being level-headed and tries to follow his example in a social situation he doesn’t know how to handle :)

“Oh my god, Forsyth, you can’t just ask people why they’re dead.”

i don’t think it comes across clearly, but this was supposed to be a real autism moment for forsyth. the original draft had something like “forsyth notices a sarcastic edge to his voice—he doesn’t mean it.” like, this is a cue that forsyth successfully picks up on, but he does it very consciously / it doesn’t come naturally to him. i ended up changing it because i couldn't get the original to flow right, but i hope it still carries the general feeling.

python is snarky. what else is new

ok nerd time SO!! you know by this point that python has lost his memories, right? well there are actually two types of memory, implicit and explicit! explicit memory encompasses facts you know and things that have happened to you, while implicit memory includes reflexes, muscle memory, and how to do things. it’s common for amnesia patients to retain their implicit memories but not their explicit ones—so, for example, you might remember how to ride a bike, but you wouldn’t know how or when you learned that. i’m playing a bit fast and loose with the rules here, but as you can see in this scene, python’s instinctive reactions about things stay the same (dislikes nobles, likes archery, etc), even though he doesn't necessarily know why he feels that way about them, which makes for some interesting dynamics. more on this later in the story!! also, this plotline takes some inspiration from the game Ghost Trick, though I can't really go into detail about how for spoiler reasons :)

one other fun thing about this scene is python starting to be more visible! i had an interesting conversation with a friend about how ghosts would convey themselves. if it were the other way around and forsyth were the ghost, i think he would tend to be more upright and would stand on/near the ground to emulate a living person (sort of in denial about being dead). python's default is either doing little flips in the air (showing disinterest) or laying "like in a hammock" (humorously making the most of his ability to fly).

thanks for the ask!! this was really fun!

[neurotheascars]

I think other vision impaired people need to understand that the fear of loosing your vision is not always "hey blind person, your life is a nightmare to me."

A lot of times it's really seriously, honestly, "I am not ready for the major adjustment it will take to live my life blind" and it's spoken by someone that has a hidden good reason to worry.

It's "If I lost the ability to see, I would lose a lot of things that are extremely important to the enjoyment of my life"

The "I would commit die if I became blind" is not "I'd kill myself if I was you" it's "I am not as strong as you and my life is more easily ruined by such things"

You don't have to, as a blind person who is totally ok with being blind, insert yourself into this worry because vision impairment affects everyone differently. Some of us have preexisting conditions that make life untenable should we lose vision.

The assumption it takes to twist "I worry about being able to function if this happened to me" into "I think your life is a nightmare" very much feels like inserting yourself into that persons perspective on their own life, when you could think about how being well adjusted to being vision impaired is a privilege unto itself. You could also be the one that dashes that fear by talking about something you had difficulty with that became easy.

Consider also whether your experience with blindness is innate because you were born with it. because it certainly does make a very big difference If you didn't have to suddenly drop everything in your life and readjust to a different one after becoming blind. It's not a nightmare to you when it very well could be for someone else and you really shouldn't talk over those people.

Like the context is super important here.

The people you are mad at are the able-bodied folk giving you unsolicited opinions directly to you about what your life would be like for them, not people who are speaking about a fear they have on their own and not talking directly to you.

If we are allowed to mourn and fear a loss of ability then why does that stop at vision impairment. Why does "you don't have to like your disability" stop here. If I don't have to love my disability then let me say I hate my vision impairment! Let me say it would ruin my life if it got worse!!

I'm not saying your blind life sucks, I'm saying MY life will suck if I completely loose my vision. Just because you can manage doesn't mean everyone will. Its actually really fucking belittling how much y'all talk about how insulting it is to hear how people can't deal with what you're oh so used to.

I'm autistic and I stim visually. I am allowed to think a life without being able to stim is a bad one for me. I'm allowed to regard visual input as the most important thing in my life.

My system is a professional artist. I'm allowed to say that blindness would destroy my life as I know it and I would have to build a new one from the ground up. I'm fast losing acuity even though I can probably see more colors than most people. Colors are my God and I seriously would have a mental health crisis if something were to take color away from my life. I'm allowed to say these things without people thinking I'm talking about how their life sucks.

This is a post made by someone with legal blindness and deteriorating vision. I will block the fuck out of you if you take this post in bad faith and misinterpret what I'm saying in a mean way.