#thats why me and someone whose a binary boy wouldnt describe their orientation in the same way

[thehealingsystem]

Now I've seen this kind of argument before and I do know where you're coming from but I still don't feel that it's really that relevant to this discussion at all

Not a single person is entitled to dating a multigender/genderfluid person. That just applies to relationships in general. If you're gay/lesbian and don't want to date a multigender or genderfluid gay/lesbian, then that's fine. That's in your right, and it's wrong to force anyone to do that

But what IS a problem is being upset that multigender/genderfluid gays and lesbians exist in the first place. I think people have this idea that if woman-aligned gays and man-aligned lesbians exist, then they are gonna be forced to be attracted to a gender that they're not, or ruin what it means to be gay or lesbian. When that's simply...not true

I get it. "I'm a lesbian, I'm not attracted to men, if multigender lesbians who are man in some way are allowed here, then doesn't that invalidate me?" That's what it is. It's a completely understandable concern. But I just think it's projecting onto people that haven't done anything. There's people in the gay and lesbian communities who ARE willing to date or ARE dating someone who's identity falls into that. And that's great for those people. If someone else doesnt? Then that's great too. All I'm saying is to just let them exist

It's so wild to me that as a community we're still so hostile to multigender and genderfluid people existing in gay and lesbian spaces.

You...are aware that people who are both men and women are allowed to be gay, right? And lesbian? Their other genders doesn't cancel their connection to womanhood, or manhood, or whatever else they id with. They are allowed to be gay despite their fem-alignment, and they are allowed to be lesbian despite their masc-alignment.

It comes from these weird online spaces that the standard to be gay or lesbian is to be a "non-woman" or a "non-man," which is inherently transmultiphobic and...extremely ahistorical. And completely misunderstands nonbinary identity. So if you're both then you just don't belong anywhere I suppose.