#thats the only way i can get Ed to fuck Izzy when Stede is his roommate

[batsarebetterthanpeople]

Original

[izzyshandz]

I swear if i see one more mf say izzy has been 'redeemed' or needed a 'redemption arc' im literally going to scream into my pillow until i lose my voice.

redeem is such a black and white way of looking at his entire character and dismisses everything hes gone through and yall (izzy haters and others) are just so fucking snob nosed and ignorant to sit there and think hes a villain because of how he acted. theyre fucking pirates. theyre not perfect, none of them are. eds a villain, stedes a villain, if youre doing it like that. ed has killed so many people, stede literally left his wife and kids and also had a hand in killing people; it may be easier for them to change because of the perspective the show gives them and they had love but izzy did not. everyone hated him, ed, his own crew, stedes crew.

normalizing peoples reactions to things as something other than villainy and heroism is so god damn important in a show that's trying to accurately involve our perspectives in this day and age. its a tale as old as time, making someone 'completely in the wrong' because their perspective isnt the one you aligned with as much.

like the rest of the crew izzy had his own bad things hes done, he didnt need this 'redemption' everyones blabbering on about. he needed to be fucking heard, to be seen, and acknowledged-- not thrown aside and abandoned because of a whim. you all can ride up blackbeards ass because oh hes so hot, hes so pretty omg wow; but that wont ever change the fact his character is a fucked up person... youre allowed to love him anyways, why not izzy? we didnt see blackbeard before screen but how hes mentioned it shows he was a shit awful person, the only reason no one cares is because on hes fuckin gay for stede or whatever so the main characters get a free ride. ( i agree they all get a free ride, im just tired of this izzy isolation man )

why does he need to be redeemed in your eyes? just because youve seen what hes done? he was literally a product of his environment in season one he was a product of blackbeard's leadership. only with the loyalty and solidarity of the crew did he really begin to find himself, thats fucking hard to do that late in life. instead of calling it some bullshit black and white redemption arc, lets just celebrate izzy being himself and being fucking loved for once in his god damn life.

hes also way more fucking mature and put together than people give him credit for. love you izzy.

edit: thank you all for the reblogs and insights in every single one, i read them i promise i do. im just so mf heartbroken we have to tag things as discourse when its really just about people not being compassionate. (as a couple people have pointed out) i will said id reblog and comment on every single tag but this is my side </3 EVERYONE PLEASE READ THE REBLOGGED TAGS TOO / / theyre so real ! ive also opened up that ask box thingy i havent been on tumblr in yrs and have 0 clue how any of that works if anyone wants my perspective on anything izzy related. *or otherwise ofmd related

[leincendiaire]

anyways salty thoughts. dont expect me to be nice

this is the one problem not exclusive to the finale, god ed's character arc just. didnt do it for me at all. I excused it before cuz I thought it would pay off as the season went on but nope. he never had a genuine apology moment, just that youtuber apology like gag and the cat collar joke. like they literally show us how the crew was completely scarred by his actions but theyre later just completely fine with him on board???? and stede keeps being his biggest stan when I think he would have been like hey what the fuck!! im sorry I hurt you but I am not responsible for your actions and you hurt my crew whom I hold very dear!! I love ed but Fuck he really went too far those first episodes and he never makes up for it. they only ever focus on His Own self journey, not how he hurt and traumatized practically every other character.

"well, I think narratively izzy's death made sense but—" no!! no it fucking didnt!! im sorry but it was just lazy writing!! they didnt know what to do with him so whoops he gets shot in the dumbest way possible. like, this aint my first rodeo, it aint the first time ive seen a character start off on their character journey to happiness only for writers to give up on it and kill them off. it's a tiring fucking trope tbh and I really wish they hadnt fallen into this trap. like his death scene wasnt good either, if youre gonna do it at least focus on his relationship with the crew, you know, the people he came to accept as family? not the man Who Shot Off His Fucking Leg And Almost Killed Him? I know they had an important relationship but that shit should have been talked about way beforehand, it deserved closure. they should have acknowledged they werent good for each other and made peace with it. izzy deserved a death with people who actually made him happy. ALSO THEY BURY HIM ON FUCKING LAND?????? he spent his life at sea!!!! he is the most devoted out of everyone to being a pirate and you bury him next to your fucking inn???? fucking twats istg

lastly I swear they forgot stede is the main character. they forgot literally everything about how to write him. he gets No Focus in the finale, and every scene he is in is bullshit. I actually wanted to punch my screen every time there was a joke about him being incompetent or whatever. like, hello??? thought we left that shit in s1??? he had Multiple Episodes about learning to be a pirate and adjusting to his new life and gaining more skills but no. he is just silly old loserboy for his cool war criminal boyfriend now. literally no skills or experience whatsoever. ok sure yea thats totally how he acted the rest of the season. also the fuck is it with him staying behind to run the inn with ed?? wasnt the whole conflict last episode their different desires out of life, with ed wanting to start a normal life and stede wanting to be a pirate?? when the Fuck did he change his mind. who are you and have you done with my boy

honestly I feel bad because jenkins is actually a good writer and the whole fandom really expected a lot from a man making his second show, and I think there were a lot of budget cuts and production issues so I can see why it turned out this way. he is probably mad about this too, I bet the cast also, like even the acting in this episode didnt feel passionate, and thats saying a lot since these actors really love this show. im just frustrated. man. time to write fics ig

[starofhisheart]

This scene in s2 w Ed and Frenchie

Parallels with this scene w Ed and Izzy from s1

(Had to snip a part out so it would fit but at first Izzy denies and then he actually tries, albeit begrudgingly.)

I always thought the scene with Izzy was showing how disconnected the pair are and while I still think that, the s2 scene shines new light on that original interaction. Where Izzy is trying to understand his boss, Frenchie doesnt even try and only denies. This is understandable ofc with everything Ed has put him and his friends through but its just interesting how they chose to parallel the scenes. Here, Frenchie has just become first mate and its almost like Ed hopes he'll be a sort of Izzy stand-in or at least falls back on his usual rapport with his first mate. But Frenchie is not Izzy. And this parallel highlights that.

I've had theories about how Ed sees Izzy and s2 has given us so much food for thought. When Izzy directly asks him "Who am I to you?" Ed softly says "what", like he's not even sure himself. The look on his face is blank but almost imploring and unsure. Izzy is just...Izzy. Friend? Lover? Thats too complicated and yet not as complicated as their relationship with each other. Izzy has clearly thought about it but has Ed? They've been together for so long ("I've been cleaning up your messes my whole fucking life.") without communicating their feelings. Bc thats what pirates do right? They dont have time for soft things like feelings.

But then Ed goes off and finds a new lover unlike any of his others and Izzy panics. Stede is a threat to their way of life, unsafe-at least thats how Izzy sees it-and then its over and Ed is breaking, depressed and then pretending to be ok

TW: suicide discussion

-and to speak on that specific point some more, I subscribe to the belief that post Lucius-talk-Ed where he's planning music shows, etc is not him coping healthily. We see this paralleled in s2 where after Izzy is "dead" Ed puts his hair up, starts cleaning and seems "chipper". But then we know he's planning to kill himself and everyone on board that same day. So this whole charade feels...macabre. He's getting his affairs in order in preparation for the big deed. Depression CAN look like this too.

When Izzy confesses he has love for Ed he says it haltingly, like its hard to even get the words out, like he's never said anything like this before (and he probably hasn't). And the words he chooses too. Instead of "I love you" he says "I have love for you". Its like he's saying after everything, all the pain and heartache, I still have love for you. But Ed refuses to, can't hear what Izzy is saying, and dismisses his confession. Perhaps he thinks this is a ploy too. After all he's unlovable right?

But we know from later scenes that Ed does love Izzy

in his own way. Some may interpret this line as platonic, some romantic-but I think it's more complicated than that. Again, Izzy and Ed have been together for so long the lines have blurred. They love each other like a brother. They're partners. They hate each other. They're an extension of each other. They're coworkers. Boss and right hand man. They can't imagine being without the other.

Well, whatever they feel for each other its capital C complicated that's for sure.

I have so many thoughts about ✨️them✨️ but I'll leave it here for now. No hate in the comments pls. Both men are my lil meows meows and have done nothing (and everything) wrong. Love those gay dudes fr.

[canonizzyhours]

Idk what the fuck 305 is talking about when they say that the canyon is the only place where people write Ed and Stede as fucking up because every time I venture into canyon lit Stede's always either getting cinnamon rolled as hard as he is outside of the canyon just with a cinnamon roll derogatory rather then affectionate or he's a predatory gay man stock character and Ed is always the Angry Violent Brown Man Who Needs Izzy To Look After Him. Meanwhile me and my mutuals have been writing Ed and Stede having realistic relationship problems for the characters it's just that they always end up fixing the problems because thats how romcoms usually go. It's how the show itself ended up going, in fact. You start them out as falling in love you create drama in the middle by having their personalities (the real ones not the ones described above) and you have them work out the drama so they can open their inn together

Anyway this Canyonite idea that everyone but them is writing fluff where nothing ever goes wrong is a way to obfuscate the fact that we're not subscribing to the add the racism and homophobia back in when Jenkins and team left it out on purpose lense that the canyon clings to because it's the only way to make Izzy not look really fucking bad

All that being said the one thing I do think that both the canyon and the rest of the fandom fails at so fucking miserably is actually addressing Ed's daddy issues. That is ripe for writing grimdark fic about and nobody will do it mostly because the main fandom as a whole has utterly failed to recon with the fact that Ed will find the nearest overbearing angry white man be he Izzy Hornigold or Poppop, and immediately start trying to get his approval. I think part of it is because a lot of people canyon or otherwise had been conceiving of Ed and Izzy as sexual in a way that doesn't pair well with the fact that Ed 100% is subconsciously registering Izzy as his father. (And in their defense, they were thinking of it sexually because IZZY subconsciously thinks of it sexually)

#317.

related posts: #305

[stedebonnit]

Ok i rewatched the trailer and I'm also looking at something Vico said at that convention about how the hardest episode for them to film (or most intense, something like that) was episode 2.

So, here's my poorly formed theory.

Episode 1 is lovelorn Stede and the establishment of Ed the wedding crasher Teach.

Episode 2, Stede is really good at tracking Ed down. Izzy has taken notice and is desperately trying to get Ed away from Stede because Izzy gets off to prefers kraken Ed

Usually, Ed is more astute and would notice the people trailing him, but whenever he isn't crashing weddings he's doing arts and crafts with wedding toppers so he's reeeally taking a backseat to captaining.

This is also why they sail head first into a storm, because Ed, who can usually predict the weather with near perfect accuracy, isn't bothering, and Izzy, as established, is a shit sailor and doesn't know the meaning of the clouds.

So, they're in a storm, a scene that I imagine was quite physically and emotionally intense to film (hence Vico saying it was intense, maybe there's even a moment of Jim thinking they won't see Olu again).

Ed is tuned out, but not as much as Izzy might think. He knew the storm was coming, at least within the last day, and he's already sick and tired of being the kraken.

So, he has a plan. They're sailing near the shore, and even in a storm, Ed is a strong swimmer. Or maybe he doesn't care much whether he makes it safely to land or not.

Either way, he's gotten everyone tied up against the ship and sailing her through the storm, he's not needed anymore, and if he were to mysteriously disappear during the storm, well, they'd all think he was dead. Whether he actually is isnt the point anymore.

The point is he doesn't have to be Blackbeard. He can be set free. He can live or die as Ed, and that's all he can ask for.

They hit a wave and Ed jumps ship, and washes up on the shore like we see in the trailer.

Izzy, for all his stupidity, doesn't believe that Blackbeard could fall off a ship in a storm. He underestimates Ed at every turn, but this time he doesn't believe it, not when believing it means he's lost his new favourite toy.

So, he let's Stede catch up with him. He decides it's time to make nice. Stede's tracked them down no matter how hard Izzy tried to drop him. They have the entire english navy after them and fucking Bonnet is the only one who made any headway in finding them.

Why?

Well, the truth is that its because Stede knows Ed, and Izzy isn't as good at losing people as he thinks, but that's for another day.

So, Izzy recruits Stede, he insists Ed isnt dead, but he's left, and Izzy needs him back. He asks if Stede has any leads on where Ed could be, and promises that he'll put up with Stede Bonnet's bizzare way of doing things if it means he can get Ed back.

Now, of course, Izzy doesn't actually plan to let this happen. The second that they find Ed he'll discreetly kill Stede and pretend like they never met. He'll do what he does best and take credit for things he hasn't done. But again, thats for another time.

The point is, Izzy asks Stede where Ed could possibly be going, and Stede has one answer.

China.

And, of course, the moment Ed does wash up on that shore very much not dead, his thoughts go to exactly the same place. He realizes that, though his heart is broken, he would still rather be free and be Ed alone than spend another day as the kraken, and if Stede wouldn't come with him to China then he can damn well do it alone.

This brings us to what we see so much of in the trailer, the unlikely duo of Stede and Izzy both equally pretending not to despise one another as they sail under a common goal. Stede, who still doesnt like Izzy but is happy to work with him if it means he can forget Izzy exists the second he's back with Ed. And Izzy, who does in fact fully intend to murder and discreetly dispose of Stede the second Ed is in his sight.

Shennanigans ensue, and that brings us to episode 3 or 4.

[bluewormonastring]

My live reactions to season 2 (episode 1)

SPOILERS OBVIOUSLY KIDS READ AT UR OWN RISK

Holy shit I’m so excited

Oh my god

Oh my god

Oauxbwkxjwhz

LOVE THE BLACK SCREEN W A SHARP CUT TO THE BEACH 10/10

OMG WE GET THE STEDE AND IZZY BEACH SWORD NOW? SO SOON? YOU SPOIL ME OFMD

Omg he’s been stabbed this is for sure a dream sequence

STEDE THATS MURDER EVEN IF ITS JUST IN YOUR HEAD

“You absolute twa….” BEST DYING WORDS EVER ILY IZZY ALWAYS AND FOREVER

THE SLOW RUN TOWARDS EACH OTHER OMG

AND STEDES FACE AND HIS VOICE AND AWW BABY

AWWW THE WAY THEY CRASHED INTO EACH OTHER

“BABE” HA FOWIHXBWNA I WAS NOT PREPARED

“I KNEW YOUD FIND ME LOVE”

“Fuckin love the beard mate”

Oh we’ve started farting lovely

OH MY GOD I WASNT PREPARED FOR HOW ID FEEL WHEN IT CUT TO HIM WITH EVERYONE AWW MY BABIES IVE MISSED YOU SO MUCH

“Cant be worse than you moaning ‘Ed oh ed’ all night” ILY PETE

Iconic title screen as always

“DEAR ED” AHHHH

SPANISH JACKIE ILY

Instantly taking an interest in the Swede as we knew would happen but still iconic

Ugh I love Leslie jones did I mention I love Leslie jones

Nat looks so scared aww baby

I love wee John being security

And host stede aww baby

I live for black Pete dealing with working in customer service

And all of them tbh

Aww poor buttons he needs his ocean and Livy

I’m ngl for a second I was like “where’s Fred armisen- oh wait”

ITS THE I THINK OF YOU OFTEN LINE YESS

HELLO YES I ADORE IZZY HANDS HE CAN DO NO WRONG IDC WHAT YOU SAY IVE MISSED MY BABY BOY

Ahh the wedding

“Demon? *shakes head* I’m the fucking devil” AHH

Guys were only 6 minutes in and this post is already long as shit so buckle up (if ur actually reading it lmao my ass would be like nope too long”

THERES MY VICO HELLO VICO ILY AND MY JOEL FRY ILY BABIES

Ah yes ye olde put trauma in a box in lock it

Awww fang baby boy someone give him a hug find him Lucius

Omg it’s the “you dumped him” scene

“Did everyone get some cake” because he’s still our precious little angle

HE JUST SNORTED RHINO HORN IS THAT A THING WAS THAT A THING IN HISTORY HUH

NO ITS THIS SCENE I DONT WANNA WATCH MY BABY BE SAD

Yes hello I love Izzy hands I would protect him with my life little baby boy

Vico looks so done w his ass

Someone give my baby a hug

Ily fang

The tears in his eyes during “unhand me” aww Angel

AWW IZZY

CONNOTHAN O NONNATHAN WE LOVE YOU YOU PRECIOUS LITTLE BOY UR ABSOLUTE PERFECTION YOU ANGEL

I love the friendship Jim and that girl have

Oh shit Jackie

“BOO CAKES” JACKIE

Stede honey you’re not intimidating

“I know that guy we had breakfast together” “you’ll be having a lot of breakfastes together” “oh okay 🙂” ily Swede

HIM DOING AN ED IMPRESSION LMAO “could be. Could be mate.”

“You’re my hero” 😞😕🙂😏

Swede bein a cute lil double agent

AWW SWEDE “my time with Jackie has been the happiest of my life. Her love has helped me locate parts of myself I didn’t even know existed and reclaim others that I have long missed” ILY

“Tonight is my turn to perform the husbandly duties”

“That’s another toe” ED YOU STAY AWAY FROM HIM LEAVE MY BABY ALONE

“Who am I to you” aww Izzy Angel baby he’s accepting it OMG “I have love for you Edward” IZZY YOURE SAYING IT OUT LOUD IM SO PROUD OF YOU BUD

IZZY YOU DID NOT JUST SAY TALK IT THROUGH YOU HAD TO HAVE KNOWN THAT WAS A HORRIBLE IDEA

OMG AND THE SHIFT IN THE MUSIC AS SOON AS HE SAID IT

IZZY RUN

RUN MY BABY BOY RUN

“As a crew” OH EDDDDD

ED DONT POINT A GUN AT JIM

OR ANYONE ELSE

THAT INCLUDES YOURSELF EDWARD TEACH BORN ON A BEACH

“They think ya crazy” cackling his face omg

Go taika absolutely slaying this scene

The way the camera is all like jittery is so good

Jim’s like “beard” makes their chin look like… not caved in but idk like it looks like they have a rly bad overbite yk

“Everyone knows why” “I don’t. Enlighten me” “your feelings for stede fucking bon-“ *GUNSHOT* ARE U SHITTING ME EDWARD NO WE DO BOT SHOOT FRIENDS

OH MY GOD HE MADE FRENCHIE FIRST MATE HOLY SHIT

Oh my god Izzy my poor baby Izzy oh my god how dare you hurt my Izzy

LMAO SWEDE

“FUCK THOSE HAMMIES UP” LMAO

There’s like no way there’s actually anything valuable in that chest

WE GOT TO SEE HER TAKE A NOSE FOR THE NOSE JAR YESSS

OH SHIT INDIGO

“Now give me back my blue shit STEVE”

Susan’s hot

DONT HURT SWEDE

Oh good okay we’re cool

I feel like she’s lying tho

But for now we’re cool

AWW FANG

AWW JIM COMFORTING FANG

“WANNA HEAR THE STORY OF THE WOODEN BOY” AWW

Living for vico using they them for the puppet

“DO THE VOICE” AWW

OMG VICO THATS ICONIC

AWW YAY THEYRE LAUGHING NOW THOSE ARE MY BABIES YAY

Living for buttons reuniting with the ocean

Okay roll credits cheers yall see you next episode

[hyperfixationspam]

the thing that really gets me about the way izzy acts in episode 10 is that he could have used the situation to his advantage. he could have been the same shitty person he always has been while still under the guise that he's doing whats best for ed. before this, he has idolized blackbeard but acknowledged that ed is not completely that idol, he just wants him to act like he is. (to protect him of course!) when ed is upset about killing stede, izzy acknowledges these feelings and doesnt even belittle them but tries to convince him that theyre better off ignoring

if izzys goal was to get ed away from stede so he could go back to "normal" he has won! it wouldve been so easy for izzy to see ed miserable and heartbroken and say "see? i told you so. he was a phase. i am still here. i know what is best for you. listen to me and you will be safe." ed wouldve been VERY susceptible to that

but izzy just completely abandons all pretense of caring about ed. he sees ed being his true self and being honest and realizes that he couldnt care less about this person. he cant stand to look at him being even slightly effeminate without becoming violent and abusive. "edward" is not a special secret name only he can use anymore, it's a fucking stupid name for a useless man because ed actually wants to be referred to that way. "blackbeard" is no longer an idealized image for an intelligent but deeply erratic man to hide behind to stay safe, it's a violent irrational creature that is the only thing that is worthwhile about the man who embodies it. izzy completely abandons his misguided but at least sensible views of ed and what is best for him, because he realizes that he is NOT what is best for ed and that he doesnt actually give a shit

now ed is being violent like izzy wants but now what? hes a miserable shell of himself. stede is going to come back and ed is going to collapse in on himself because he cant do this anymore. imagine if izzy had leaned into ed's emotional intelligence that he was strengthening while coping with stede's betrayal. ed couldve fully accepted what lucius told him and LET GO OF STEDE. stede could come back and ed would be like "man i dont need you. you hurt my feelings but thats ok bc i am enough without you." sure they wouldve probably made up eventually, but izzy wouldve gotten a much more stable version of what he wants from ed. but this version of ed is sensitive and tired and feels worthless and will probably be MORE receptive to stedes apologies because he just wants to lay down and feel loved for a minute, heartbreak be damned. and izzy is going to realize that pushing ed to the brink has once again completely backfired on him because he was too angry and impulsive to actually sit down and think about the consequences of his treatment of ed for two fucking seconds

[blow-me-a-kis]

Looking over the responses to the worksheet again and I'm honestly quite pleased how Izzy haters disclose how unreasonable their aims are. The "I want Izzy fans to get their own fandom" arguments that were repeated over and over as solutions are preposterous, but deeply revealing. Thats not at all an actionable resolution for our differences. The fandom doesn't belong to any group of fans, its a community and a collaborative effort, and those arguments have real entitled NIMBY, no-kink-at-pride energy.

Izzy fans getting their own fandom is like? We already have. The Canyon was born out of a need for a safe haven from harassment. We already have our own discords and communities elsewhere. Many of Izzy haters go out of their way to interact with us and then claim we're oppressing them because we block them, or give reasonable responses or mock their clownish rancid, inflammatory takes they create and tag under Izzy's name with the explicit purpose of reaching out to Izzy fans who are just minding our damn business.

Their exclusionary attitude towards Izzy and his fans contribute to conditions in fandom that make it unsafe for even Gentlebeardie folks to interact with Izzy, because Izzy haters project their extremist views onto their peers and then pester and dogpile them when they step out of line. Their cop-like tendencies have lowkey created a bit if a surveillance state on main pairing end of fandom. In that same way, Izzy fans fear making content of Ed/Stede, because it invites weirdos who have this incredibly territorial attitude towards Ed and Stede and just see that someone is an Izzy fan and believe they don't have the right(???) to enjoy the main pairing.

Also?? is Vico gunna leave the main fandom? Are the writers? Is David Jenkins gunna depart from Gentlebeardie side of fandom and join the Izzy fandom we create because he suggested fans explore Ed and Izzy's love story that he put in the show on purpose? Please. (Altho imho if they did exclusively interact with The Canyon they would have a much safer, relaxed, and fun experience among the fans, because Izzy stans are chill af, and among us have pretty much zero parasocial fucking losers who bully ppl's wives or pick thru every social media post the cast/crew ever made to determine if they're Problematique, or who will monitor and dogpile them over every public misstep).

The harassment of Izzy fans visibly picks up following any positive engagement by the cast/crew with Izzy/Con, or their positive mentions of Ed/Izzy. Izzy haters who get activated at the mere mention of ppl enjoying Izzy are destined for misery because they struggle to accept that Izzy is apart of the ofmd experience and so are his fans. Instead of regulating their feelings around Izzy, and learning to respect the various interpretations of Izzy and his complex relationships to the other characters, they hold their pessimistic interpretation of canon far too preciously, and expect others to accept it as fact and to tip toe around the minefield of triggers that creates in them.

I know it can feel "both-sides"-esque, and sort of toxic posi to reach across the aisle as it were, but like I said in my reply, it's just getting started. A really important part to me about these conversation is to permit these folks to tell us their side and be honest about their entitlement, and their exclusionary, hierarchal, disposability-centered politic.

They claim their "activism" is to better the conditions in fandom for BIPOC, but these talks expose their methods are incredibly patronizing and generalize BIPOC as a single infallible God-like entity, who is so well behaved as to only care about Gentlebeard, and not a highly varied, multifaceted community of regular folks (some of whom love Izzy very much), which is high key dehumanizing and racist, and demonstrably results in racist harm towards BIPOC. Whiteness, white fragility, and racism is very much at the core of the issues in this fandom, because Izzy hater's sense of worth, their egos, is tied to their shallow "activism", and ultimately that's what they're trying to protect and they project their failure to care for BIPOC onto Izzy and his fans.

Anyone can talk a mess of social justice word salad to defend the results of their actions, but you can't fake liberationist, community-centered values or praxis that you haven't actually learned or internalized, and these talks expose the unpacked conservative biases Izzy haters operate on. We can't change people, they are the only ones who get to decide when they're done, but I trust fans with a good head on their shoulders to see what is happening.

I’m glad that people are having serious conversations about racism in the OFMD fandom, but I kinda feel that the conversation went from Izzy fans experiencing racist, sexist, transphobic, etc. harassment for liking Izzy to the more general issue of racism in the OFMD fandom.

Obviously that is a conversation that’s important and needs to happen, but the end result was that…well…the same anti-Izzy fans who were denying that the harassment was a big deal got to voice their concerns about their own experiences while the fact that Izzy fans specifically were being harassed got brushed under the rug.

[batsarebetterthanpeople]

I know I sound like a broken record at this point but I just saw an Ed/Izzy take that fucking sent me

So it was in regards to the scene where Izzy loses the duel with Stede. Basically someone referred to it as an "ending of a 30+ year relationship" and the context of it kinda felt like they were a Blackhands shipper but I'm gonna analyze that statement from both the perspective of someone who does and someone who doesn't ship Blackhands.

Because I assumed, as I thought most people did, that the characters were the actor's ages. We can get into that with characters like Stede and Lucius and Calico Jack who have reasons that someone might assume theyre a little younger or even a lot younger than the actors, but I'm gonna stick with that assumption for Ed and Izzy at the very least.

So when Season 1 came out Taika Waititi was 46 and Con O'Neill was 55. Making Ed and Izzy 46 and 55 respectively. I want you to subtract 30 from those numbers. *Snaps fingers* quickly (it's 16 and 25)

I don't think I need to tell you why if you're a Blackhands enjoyer their "relationship" cannot be 30 years old. Thats obvious enough. But even if we're analyzing them in a platonic sense, or they met at that age and didn't get sexual until later in their relationship I still can't help but feel like the whole dynamic would be different. First of all I just don't buy that Izzy would be behaving the way that he does towards Blackbeard the legend of he'd known Ed before he was even capable of growing a beard. 16 year olds are not good at hiding their emotions or projecting power let's just say that and the way Ed and Izzy act Ed had been doing both since they met. 20 years is the maximum number you're gonna get me to agree on and even that's sketchy because I feel like if they'd been on the same boat for 20 years Izzy would have had his Blackbeard fantasy shattered by now. These men have not known each other that long and the only person who can tell me otherwise is David Jenkins

[johannestevans]

"izzy wants to control blackbeard" is such a shallow reading of the text when like. half the time when we see them together izzy is literally trying to gently coax ed into doing his job

izzy DOESN'T want to control ed. he's BEEN the one making pretty much all the decisions, seemingly for some time, perhaps even years, as ed has declined and become more erratic

he doesn't want to control ed, but like. he doesn't want stede to control Ed either - he thinks that Stede will get Ed and everyone else killed

what Izzy wants is basically for Ed to not be mentally ill and to be in charge again, he wants Ed to have his own internal motivation that's also roughly connected to common sense and self-preservation - he misses the Ed to whom those things were intrinsic (or at least, thats how Izzy remembers it)

i don't think izzy is a good person, and he's absolutely jealous, possessive, cold, and nasty, but like. he isn't actually that cunning or intelligent. he's not creative like Ed is.

like, do all the people who despise Izzy not see how and why Ed keeps Izzy so close? why he trusts him so entirely even when Izzy is being a massive bitch?

when he pats Izzy on the lower back and says "need you here", that's not just some shallow, meaningless line, and it's not a manipulation either

when izzy snaps and resigns, Ed's SURPRISED

like. from Ed's perspective, Izzy is this unshakably loyal pillar in his life. Izzy comes to him and doesn't try to order him about, but suggests stuff kind of desperately until Ed says "fine" and they do something

for years, Izzy has acted as Edward's executive function, an external motivator - he still gets Ed to choose and make decisions wherever possible, but he needles and pushes at Ed to make the decisions in the first place, because otherwise Ed would just obsess over some little thing, or sink into one of his depressions

like. Izzy brings him his tea. Izzy. Look at Izzy. look what a dick he is. is that a man you imagine making tea for you and gently handing you the cup? setting the cup by your bedside and saying, "Edward, come on, it's been three days. just walk out on the deck and you'll feel better."

izzy couldn't survive without Ed, I don't think. he's unlikeable, he's a bitch, I think he makes a great boatswain or quartermaster, and he cares about a ship being in good repair, he actually cares if they lose crew (unlike Ed), he's efficient

but Ed wouldn't have survived as long as he has without Izzy. not because Ed isn't a genius, not because Ed isn't smart or intelligent, but because Ed is fundamentally disabled by the immensity of his mental illness

like, Ed and Izzy have this codependent fuck-up going on where Ed is a creative genius who's constantly depressed and wants to die, whether it's because he's bipolar, ADHD, just prone to depressions, whatever

Izzy has rage issues, but imo like. he's so obsessive, he's so incapable of remaining calm, and I think he's probably got some kind of anxiety issues on top of his evident self-loathing and masochism

and so they rely on each other. Izzy coaxes Ed out of bed while also bullshitting to everyone how well Blackbeard is doing, safeguarding his reputation - and Ed keeps Izzy on because Izzy is the only man he can trust to be a complete mess in front of and not risk his life...

until Stede. until Stede's crew. until Stede says, actually, its okay to not be okay sometimes. thats alright, isn't it? we all have bad days. I've had millions of bad days. but together, I think we can have some nice ones. shall we?

and they do.

and Ed is suddenly loved and supported by a huge group of people who see that he's messy and sad and dramatic and don't make a big deal of it but also don't make him hide it, they SUPPORT him very casually and easily, and also, there's ofc Stede

whereas Izzy spirals. because everyone's treating him like he's the way he is for no reason, but also like, acting as if he does what he does to hurt Ed, when from his POV like... he's been keeping Ed alive, and now Ed is throwing him away for these nice shiny people who are encouraging him to be weak and who will get him killed

this is why Izzy being in the wrong genre is such a thing, bc like. he cannot see this as anything but dangerous to all of them, but especially Ed

[prettybard]

So I’ve watched a ton of reactions to ofmd (indulging the ones mentioned in your post) because I was really curious to see how people responded to a show like this and I’ve observed some THINGS

• People generally don’t like/aren’t sold by ep 1 (crazy to me since it’s one of my faves and I was hooked instantly but it). Even people that liked it don’t seem to get the tone just from one ep.

• People always end up having a favorite crew member. Very fun to see who they end up gravitating towards

• Most people believe Black Pete’s stories at first/think they will be proven right later

•Most people don’t pay attention to Jim’s pronouns unless they are already aware that they are nb/are told by commenter that they are nb

• A lot of the little jokes and clever moments and line deliveries kinda go over a lot of peoples heads

• Queer people love Stede, straight people have to warm up to him

• Most people credit Taika for this show/most straight people heard about it because of his connection to it

• I’ve only seen one person previously unfamiliar with the foot touch in ep 8 notice it

• Everyone loves Lucius

• Hardly anyone notices how romantic the moonlight scene in ep 5 is (and of course the ones who pick up on it are the gays)

• This show reads much better for gay people. Like of course, but it’s interesting to actually watch the differences in reaction to a lot of moments. I mostly like to watch people who aren’t familiar with the show at all and I like to keep the mix of people (straight, queer, poc, white etc.) diverse so that I can see how people with different backgrounds respond. Queer people 100% of the time are feeling those themes and narratives.

• Everyone always loses their shit when Karl dies

• No one ever talks about how fun Geraldo is and that’s wild to me. Loved his character so much.

• End of ep 3/ep 4 is what usually hooks people

• Most people, including the straights, actually do see the kiss coming but there are a few who are still shocked

• People want to fuck Blackbeard and Jim but what else is new

• A surprising amount of people “predict” that Ed isn’t going to kill Stede because they’re going to end up friends. Like…..yeah. He’s the main character. Idk. They kinda set that up for you.

• A lot of Ed’s vulnerable moments go overlooked

• Most people can’t believe Ed leaves the dock and freak the hell out when he goes back to being Blackbeard. Very fun reactions to those things.

• Not many people point out Izzy’s attraction to Blackbeard

All this information may be completely useless but it’s really fun to observe how people respond to this show. OFMD is UNDOUBTEDLY a show for the gays but I love that by the end most straight people also highly praise and recommend the show.

omg anon i love you and im gonna try to respond to most of the points bc im v happy i got this message.

it genuinely made me so sad when ppl weren't that into the first episode, its so perfect and very easily shows the found family shit thats about to happen.

ik a lot of new people dont know about jims pronouns but by fucking god does it make me uncomfortable when ppl immediately use she/her pronouns for them,, but im glad that ppl start using it when commenters tell them abt jim.

OMG YEAH SO MANY LITTLE JOKES GO OVER PPLS HEADS AND IM JUST SCREAMING AT MY SCREEN TELLING THEM TO APPRECIATE IT ASKFJS,,, the scene where stedes like "no this is it,, thats it." THE FUCJING LINE DELIVERY ON THAT IS PERFECT BUT LIKE NO ONE MENTIONED IT

stede is for the gays,, only we can fully understand that little fucker

no bc it made me so mad that not many people credited david jenkins properly,, like its his show?!?!?!

everyone should love lucius,, hes perfect in every way

GOD I WOULD GET SO SAD WHEN MOST PPL JUST SKIMMED BY THE MOONLIGHT SCENE,, AND I DON'T THINK ILL EVER FORGET "nice , theyre friends now" HUH?!??!??!?!

i think alot of straight people just dont care, like most of the youtubers ive seen react to the show, mostly just care about the comedy and if its entertaining. it kinda shocking to me seeing ppl just act normally about the show and not completely dissect it and every single theme they can find

ahhh omg yeah idk how ppl can look at the bathtub scene with ed and just go "aww thats sad" and just dismiss it?!?! that scene changed my brain chemistry and ruined me,, ed vulnerable moments were my favorite and i really wanted more people to talk about that

oh man i feel like i can go on a whole ass rant about ed becoming the kraken,, like people say it doesn't make sense but if you just think about it for 2 fucking seconds you can see that it v much makes complete sense to his character,, hes just trying to protect himself

i like pointing out izzy's atrraction for blackbeard bc its fucking hilarious how pathetic he is for a man that barely even cared abt him and doesn't even exist (hes in love with the idea of blackbeard and but not ed)

anyways this was incredibly fun to respond to, anon!! pls send me more shit if you want <33

[thosegayoldmen]

Our Flag Means Death Prompts so far

Theres a lot of muddled ideas in here so pick at them as you will  😁 Stede doesnt get to reuinite with Ed right away, he finds most of his crew, but he has no boat, he has a small dingy, and no funds after giving up his life as a rich guy. So he actually does the pirating thing for bit. (In history he does do this too) he gets a ship, he pirates a bit more violently, but not brutal, and he makes a name for himself. BUT he's not Stede Bonnet anymore, Stede Bonnet is dead, so he becomes Thomas Edwards. But also, I love this idea with them already reuinited but not on good terms. In the case of him finding Ed before Ed is ready, he gets held hostage, or is allowed to stay on board or something similar...hes not captain, but his crew is allowed to not be killed. Maybe he works for Blackbeard now, a lowly crew member, he learns what its like to be a real pirate, not a captain but a crewmember, he knows his place and does his job and suffers and works for it. He has had conversations with Ed,  told him he is HIS, and he won't leave again unless hes thrown overboard and thats that. Ed can't bear to throw him off so puts up with it. He talks to Ed in passing of course, but it's always on Ed's terms, and they back and forth a lot not knowing where either of them stand because of the rift on the ship. (Bonus points if the crew accidentally call Stede Captain sometimes hehe) But one day it comes up, 'No I'm not Stede Bonnet anymore that man is dead'. 'I told you I was yours, I meant it in every sense of the word, I AM YOURS, I am Edwards'. Maybe cue some soft times here hehe Another idea going back to him taking the name Thomad Edwards; he takes his own ship, is a real pirate now, at least a low level one, he pillages and does the pirate thing, enough to spread his name and gain Blackbeards notice for the way he runs his ship.  And maybe while hes at port he bad mouths Blackbeard a bit more to bait him into attacking his ship and coming to him. But hes also learned a thing or two, hes learned to sword fight better, he knows how to sail a ship now, how to command a crew. And when Blackbeard catches up to him, of course Ed's furious, they sword fight, and they sword fight well. Ed is surprised but still overwhelms him and stabs him and THEN he reins in the kraken. 'Oh god what have i done' Life threateneing shit is always the best drama. But not only is Ed mad at Stede for leaving him. Stede is mad at Ed for trying to kiill his crew, he’s as pissed off as Ed is, and so the sword fight is pretty intense, they're fighting for real, and though neither wants to actually kill the other, it's not play time like before. Above all else, them reuinting shortly or after a while, I always see Stede being mad as hell. He finds Lucious drowing and is fucking fuming. Ed he loves dearly, but he tried to kill his FAMILY. And that won't stand. Maybe he at least stabs Ed for it properly. I also love the idea of Izzy being the one to fatally or badly wound Stede, maybe thinking it was what Blackbeard wanted. Ed hesitates to run Stede through and Izzy does it from behind, expecting praise, but Ed just goes apeshit on Izzy.  Annnyyyyyway, that’s just a few thoughts on this show, I have utter brainrot. SO if people more talented than me can write good shit with this, please go ahead! And please let me know when you do!  😋 Also feel free to message me about any specifics, I have a lot of thoughts... 😅

[krakenapologist]

do you think ed is gay or bi or is that a silly way of looking at things. i saw you turned on asks so i wanted to send an ask and ur url made me think....

this is actually a question i have asked myself and not known the answer to lmao. but ill try to say Something regardless bcuz i ❤️ talking

so. as im sure we’ve all noticed there are very few women im the show :(, now part of what that means is the only woman i remember ed notably interacting w (i’ve never fully rewatched so quite possibly im wrong,) was the lady at the party. yknow the one who was mabel. and obv there was no attraction there lmao. so ill reiterate that to be honest- i really cant tell w/o having any evidence. like theres no evidence to say he is or isn’t exclusively into men.

now. all of that said. i think that ed is way more aware of his orientation than stede, as in, like…. he has acknowledged to himself that he’s attracted to guys. (stede, on a deep level, recognizes that he’s gay and then when he meets ed he recognizes that he’s in love w/ him, but he is in denial/repressed/etc for most of the season. and he’s not sure it rlly counts as love buttttt we’ve talked ab that.) like ed’s had his dalliances w/ calico jack or whatever ykw like he’s at the least very cognizant that he’s a, how you say, mlm. but he’s CERTAINLY not as open ab this as, say, lucius or black pete etc.

which. it is interesting to me. his right hand(ha) man is izzy “homophobia” hands. whom he chokes for calling him a namby pamby pining after his boyfriend (which izzy enjoys maybe a little too much but u know how it is w/ izzy hands.) and he very much avoids mentioning his Past w jack (although thats more easily explained as him not wanting to say anything in front of stede for Obvious Reasons.) but anyway it does make me wonder how open he is ab it. like. imo i feel like it’s No Secret and rlly pretty clear that blackbeard likes dudes but i dont think he necessarily wld ever . say that. as much as it’s an understood thing. idk idk if im making sense here , im just thinking, pondering…

ANYWAY!! I THINK WHATS NOTABLE abt ed is that he is not expecting ! is not aware that he will!! is not prepared for! falling in love with stede bonnet! falling in very gentle lovely love . that is not something i think he saw in his cards, though it was very very probably something he wldve imagined longingly. yknow. knowing him. but that side of him was definitely not something he indulged before stede. see, the thing he really learns from stede about himself is that some men should concern themselves with gentler things. which is, in a way, his main arc when it comes to his sexuality (as well as his Everything) in the season. like that he can fall in tender soft love, with a man, as a man. be gentle. and then that all gets fucked up at the end which is FUN&CUTE.

anyway this explicitly didn’t answer ur question and so here’s the answer uve been waiting for: idk. gay in terms of my url is the general umbrella of gay. dont worry about it. yeah it was definitely a silly stupid question thats why i dont know, its ur fault,

[izzyliker]

i disagree deeply about the reading of izzy as homophobic or misogynistic. i think "this is feminine" is projection on y/our part looking at actions that are not necessarily """"weak"""" but counterproductive or dangerous to the roles theyre supposed to be playing because izzys grievances with stede have stricly been

he is disrespectful to ed

he is disrespectful to IZZY

he fucking sucks at being a pirate, AND is rubbing off on ed who was already stumbling

sucking at being a pirate is whatever when you dont have to be around him, its bitch eating crackers shit for a petty guy already annoyed by everyone and everything around him, but izzy is forced not only to be AROUND him, but also to be there while ed """mentors""" him, which amounts to both ed AND stede abandoning whatever nominal responsibilities they had and leaving izzy to do everything, including try to keep some amount of order with stedes disrespectful crew

sucking at being a pirate is, in fact, actively endangering not only the authority structure theyve created but also their lives – izzy has already been putting out mutinies and trying to get eds crew to settle down with their complaints about ed, which by all accounts are reasonable and fair and izzy is increasingly running out of ways to defend him, meanwhile ed is condescendingly telling him it must be hard to keep the crew from revolting and risking their lives

stede is focused on the WRONG THING – we have to keep in mind that izzy is first and foremost invested in 1. the continued survival of the crew and 2. the power structures he has worked so hard to establish, that are his JOB to maintain and that are the thing that makes sure that he CAN keep everyone alive: ed is his boss and hes the second in power and the executor of eds wishes BUT also has functionally been his common sense filter for ages and ages, and then theres the crew, which MUST respect him and his word, always, because thats what keeps them alive. stede is focused on irrelevant aesthetics and is basically chasing butterflies letting his ship run aground. his own crew complains about it. theyre thinking about revolting in the first episode. izzy sees this and he agrees and unlike them he actually has the power and experience to do something about it all

we already know that stede is a ridiculous peacock of a man. nobody in the pirate world takes him seriously. he contrasts with all the serious pirates because hes ridiculous and has no idea what hes doing and izzy hates that shit because he thinks its first of all embarrassing and disrespectful and second of all dangerous, and this isnt just his perception, its true, it is, by the time they meet stede and his crew are only alive because of a series of extremely lucky coincidences, one of the major of which is that ed has decided to involve himself with them and made IZZY be responsible for managing a crew that HATES him and that he hates back for being disrespectful lazy slackers

crucially izzy's anger isnt actually over him being kind, and especially not in isolation – its always in relation to how hes making ed a worse captain MORE rapidly than he already was. we have no reason to think izzy KNOWS any of what he said to stede in ep4, because all the dialogue we see between them is izzy communicating very clearly and explicitly and ed playing games with him, probably because he finds it easier to open up to stede as a stranger and a symbol what he sees as the ideal freedom with wealth and leisure, "finer things," than he does to izzy who hes already letting down and who would tell him what he already knows – "pirates dont retire" – unless he already had a plan. he is under pressure to make decisions and know what hes doing in the context of being a pirate for GOOD REASONS beyond "izzy keeps him in toxic masculinity hell."

i do not see his unrequited love for blackbeard as being "hypermasculine." hes in love with his boss and hes jealous. just because hes a man in gay love with someone who doesnt like him back doesnt make it hypermasculine. if anything hes written like an inversion of the "bitch ex-wife of one of the main romance characters tries to keep them apart" trope, which is distinctly not about hypermasculinity. izzy is above all practical. he loves ed in a way that keeps him safe. in his mind everything he does is an extension of everything ELSE hes been doing so far to keep ed alive and to serve as his direct second in the hierarchy of the ship. he wants stede out because hes driving ed off his course and worsening his already ailing abilities to be a captain. like he & bb's crew said hes eds pet dog. a distraction, extra mouth to feed, completely useless to them. and its true. from his pov hes completely correct. from eds pov hes not, because ed doesnt actually WANT that anymore, but he doesnt actually give izzy anything to work with, he keeps going back on his word, he keeps saying hell kill stede and then says nevermind, izzys fucking infuriated, izzys still doing all the actual work just like always and eds still being condescending and ignoring him pleading for clarity and a return to the time when they were actually a functional crew. izzys already done with him by the time they get to the revenge. "consider this my fucking resignation." and then he doesnt leave. why? ed tells him he has a plan and izzy believes him. and then he doesnt go through with it. and then this repeats until ed chooses stede OVER IZZY, which by all accounts is to his imminent detriment and maybe death, and izzy finally says FINE. im going to get this bitch off the ship if its the last thing i do.

i also dont know why people are so determined to ignore the fact that "homophobia is purposefully not at the forefront of this show" is something the writers have said and that if izzy WAS supposed to be a stand in for misogyny & homophobia that would, in fact, BE putting homophobia at the forefront of the show, considering that not only would one of the major side characters be a homophobe but the central conflict would be a result of homophobia.

theres some ofmd meta around blackbeard as a persona, femininity and masculinity, and like generally gender roles that really bothers me and its really difficult for me to explain how and why because it's so multilayered, but in rough bullets i wanted to say that

femininity is not inherently more authentic than masculinity; softness or kindness is not inherently more authentic than violence or anger

stede's "softness" and perceived kindness is intimately tied to his highly artificial and performative role in society, and is not in fact always genuine (see his repeated warnings about passive aggressiveness and rudeness/meanness disguised under layers and layers of sarcasm, "these are my people")

ed doesn't have this context and as someone to whom all these things have been denied since he was born to him im sure all this does seem like genuine freedom and ability to be, if not authentically soft and kind, then at the very least authentic

we do have this context and know that stede's relationship to flamboyance and "femininity" is much more complex than just "he can perform it and ed can't" because despite his supposed ability to be true to himself he still is identified as doing it wrong (bullies, his community as a whole), even without getting into the fact that he on the other hand cannot display anger or partake in violence, even when it might be the authentic reaction to something

stede similarly doesnt have the full context for eds relationship with masculinity and rejection; to him it seems like it all comes to him naturally, hes the platonic ideal of masculinity, hes able to perform it correctly (irt what stede wants to be; aside from what stede sees as senseless violence with cj), it seems to be his authentic personality, and has the room to exist without ridicule or social structures to restrain it

both stede and ed long to be able to express their WHOLE selves, as opposed to just the fragments that have been allowed to exist within their respective social roles

the idea that blackbeard isnt "really" ed or that ed was putting on a fully artificial persona is about as convincing to me as the idea that stede bonnet as he existed pre escaping his life (that is: thoughtless, reckless in his relationships, distant and unwilling to take an equal role in his family) wasnt "really" stede. they were those people. growth or change in personality or needs doesnt retroactively negate past versions of yourself and make them not "real." blackbeard was real ed, it worked for him, he was that person.

seeing takes about how stede growing a beard or wearing more neutral clothes (like at the end of ep10) as opposed to his colorful complicated outfits is him regressing into Toxic Masculinity are frustrating to me because stedes arc is just as much about escaping the rigid structures of high class life as eds is about escaping the rigid structures of his own class and life, and fundamentally his ornate outfits are a sign of not ONLY (or even primarily) his femininity but also his class and the life he was tied to for so long

masculinity is not "regression" and stede was not any more authentic than ed was, they both learn from each other

[bluewormonastring]

My (last) live reaction to season 2 (episode 8)

SPOILERS OBVIOUSLY KIDS READ AT UR OWN RISK

Y’all I am not excited about this one with where we left of and my sister telling me I’m gonna be crushed it’s not looking good

I’m actually incredibly scared right now

This is wild

Awwww he’s fishin

AH THE ED VOICEOVER

This is so angsty and I love it

It’s abt to cut to some shenanigans no way is this fr

He’s in his sad girl era

Ew praying ha no thanks

AWWWW POP POP BE NICE TO ED

NO STOP HES TRYING HIS HARDEST

BE NICE

Ah u buttholes

It’s giving the baby stede tied to a boat scene

“You guys are dicks” phahhahaha

Aww the smaller little mini nose jar

JACKIE PUNCH HIS ASS WHATS GOING ON

I’m so fucking mad Auntie is dead I love her

Oh stede ur so you

AWW NO HES WORRIED ABOUT STEDE HE THINKS HE WAS ON THE BOATS WHEN THEY BLEW UP

Ed no murdering that’s not good for ur mental health smh

NO STOP DONT HAVE ED THINK ALL HES GOOD AT IS KILLING

CAN THIS DUDE NOT STAY SANE FOR LONGER THAN A FUCKING EPISODE JESUS CHRIST

Did Ed really just drag on wet leather under water there’s no way that went well he was definitely under there for like a few minutes struggling to put that shit on

Archie Fang get away from the front that’s how you get killed

IZZY

AH

IZZY UR SO PERFECT AND IM SO WORRIED ABOUT YOU PLEASE SHUT YOUR FUCKING MOUTH

“And you’re… Pinocchio?”

IZZY NO DO NOT GO TO A SECONDARY LOCATION THATS HOW YOU DIE

Awww Izzy looks sad

This monologue is going to be the death of me awww Izzy ur growing so much I’m so proud of you

AH SOMEONE FOUND ONE OF HIS BOTTLE MESSAGES

OH MY GOD YES EDDDDDD

I’m hoping he’s now gonna take off all the Blackbeard shit and go back to being Ed and then somethings gonna happen and he’s gonna put them back on and he’s gonna keep flip flopping

“YOU WROTE ME A LOVELY LETTER” lmaooo

OH MY GOD STEDE IS ON A BEACH TOO THIS IS WHEN THEY RUN TOWARDS EACH OTHER OMG

AHH AND THERE ARE THE BRITISH

Lmaoooo watching everyone trying to run on sand is hilarious

LOOK AT THEM RUNNING TOWARDS EACH OTHER

OH MY GOD THEYRE KISSING AHH

Awwwww babiess

If one of them gets stabbed while they’re kissing I’m gonna kill myself

Zheng almost dying while they’re kissing is so funny

OH MY GOD AUNTIE ISNT DEAD

YAAAAAAAY

YESSS AUNTIEEEE

I LOVE YOUUUU

Awww look at the 3 besties just chillin having a good time surrounded by bodies

“You did very well babe” AWWWWW

I feel very lured into a false sense of safety here

Yeah tell his ass izzyyyyyyy

BUT LIKE DONT GET YOURSELF KILLED PLEASE IZZY I LOVE YOU TOO MUCH “and you are a rancid syphilitic cunt” AHH YESS

YES JACKIE YOU POISONED THEM ALLLLL

Totally fuckin called that that was poison fuck yeah

AWWWW AUNTIE AND ZHENG STOP IM CRYING

Aww look at all my ragamuffins

“It’s only suicide if we die” so true

GUYS IM ON THE LAST 10 MINUTES OF THE FINALE EPISODE IS OFMD ABOUT TO PULL A GOOD OMENS AND BREAK MY HEART

I’m incredibly fucking scared right now

FUCK OFF I KNEW YOU WERE GONNA DO THAT

I KNEW YOU WERE GONNA KILL MY SON

HOW FUCKING DARE YOU

IM GENUINELY MAD LIKE I DONT GIVE A SHIT ABOUT YOUR FUCKING PLOT I LOVE IZZY

Yeah whatever

I honestly can’t be fucked to watch this right now

I don’t give a shit about this

Fuck off I don’t care

Im so fucking pissed off they’re doing this I’m not even sad

Fuck you dude

Yeah this show is ruined for me now I just genuinely don’t want to watch any more of it

I honestly just don’t give a shit about finishing this episode

Yeah yeah they’re getting married who the fuck cares

Whatever I’m done with this shit yeah they own an inn okay sure whatever who the fuck cares cause I personally don’t give half a shit

Yeah alright shows over now bye I’m pissed off that’s genuinely ruined this show for me okay bye or whatever I guess

My live reactions to season 2 (episode 1)

SPOILERS OBVIOUSLY KIDS READ AT UR OWN RISK

Holy shit I’m so excited

Oh my god

Oh my god

Oauxbwkxjwhz

LOVE THE BLACK SCREEN W A SHARP CUT TO THE BEACH 10/10

OMG WE GET THE STEDE AND IZZY BEACH SWORD NOW? SO SOON? YOU SPOIL ME OFMD

Omg he’s been stabbed this is for sure a dream sequence

STEDE THATS MURDER EVEN IF ITS JUST IN YOUR HEAD

“You absolute twa….” BEST DYING WORDS EVER ILY IZZY ALWAYS AND FOREVER

THE SLOW RUN TOWARDS EACH OTHER OMG

AND STEDES FACE AND HIS VOICE AND AWW BABY

AWWW THE WAY THEY CRASHED INTO EACH OTHER

“BABE” HA FOWIHXBWNA I WAS NOT PREPARED

“I KNEW YOUD FIND ME LOVE”

“Fuckin love the beard mate”

Oh we’ve started farting lovely

OH MY GOD I WASNT PREPARED FOR HOW ID FEEL WHEN IT CUT TO HIM WITH EVERYONE AWW MY BABIES IVE MISSED YOU SO MUCH

“Cant be worse than you moaning ‘Ed oh ed’ all night” ILY PETE

Iconic title screen as always

“DEAR ED” AHHHH

SPANISH JACKIE ILY

Instantly taking an interest in the Swede as we knew would happen but still iconic

Ugh I love Leslie jones did I mention I love Leslie jones

Nat looks so scared aww baby

I love wee John being security

And host stede aww baby

I live for black Pete dealing with working in customer service

And all of them tbh

Aww poor buttons he needs his ocean and Livy

I’m ngl for a second I was like “where’s Fred armisen- oh wait”

ITS THE I THINK OF YOU OFTEN LINE YESS

HELLO YES I ADORE IZZY HANDS HE CAN DO NO WRONG IDC WHAT YOU SAY IVE MISSED MY BABY BOY

Ahh the wedding

“Demon? *shakes head* I’m the fucking devil” AHH

Guys were only 6 minutes in and this post is already long as shit so buckle up (if ur actually reading it lmao my ass would be like nope too long”

THERES MY VICO HELLO VICO ILY AND MY JOEL FRY ILY BABIES

Ah yes ye olde put trauma in a box in lock it

Awww fang baby boy someone give him a hug find him Lucius

Omg it’s the “you dumped him” scene

“Did everyone get some cake” because he’s still our precious little angle

HE JUST SNORTED RHINO HORN IS THAT A THING WAS THAT A THING IN HISTORY HUH

NO ITS THIS SCENE I DONT WANNA WATCH MY BABY BE SAD

Yes hello I love Izzy hands I would protect him with my life little baby boy

Vico looks so done w his ass

Someone give my baby a hug

Ily fang

The tears in his eyes during “unhand me” aww Angel

AWW IZZY

CONNOTHAN O NONNATHAN WE LOVE YOU YOU PRECIOUS LITTLE BOY UR ABSOLUTE PERFECTION YOU ANGEL

I love the friendship Jim and that girl have

Oh shit Jackie

“BOO CAKES” JACKIE

Stede honey you’re not intimidating

“I know that guy we had breakfast together” “you’ll be having a lot of breakfastes together” “oh okay 🙂” ily Swede

HIM DOING AN ED IMPRESSION LMAO “could be. Could be mate.”

“You’re my hero” 😞😕🙂😏

Swede bein a cute lil double agent

AWW SWEDE “my time with Jackie has been the happiest of my life. Her love has helped me locate parts of myself I didn’t even know existed and reclaim others that I have long missed” ILY

“Tonight is my turn to perform the husbandly duties”

“That’s another toe” ED YOU STAY AWAY FROM HIM LEAVE MY BABY ALONE

“Who am I to you” aww Izzy Angel baby he’s accepting it OMG “I have love for you Edward” IZZY YOURE SAYING IT OUT LOUD IM SO PROUD OF YOU BUD

IZZY YOU DID NOT JUST SAY TALK IT THROUGH YOU HAD TO HAVE KNOWN THAT WAS A HORRIBLE IDEA

OMG AND THE SHIFT IN THE MUSIC AS SOON AS HE SAID IT

IZZY RUN

RUN MY BABY BOY RUN

“As a crew” OH EDDDDD

ED DONT POINT A GUN AT JIM

OR ANYONE ELSE

THAT INCLUDES YOURSELF EDWARD TEACH BORN ON A BEACH

“They think ya crazy” cackling his face omg

Go taika absolutely slaying this scene

The way the camera is all like jittery is so good

Jim’s like “beard” makes their chin look like… not caved in but idk like it looks like they have a rly bad overbite yk

“Everyone knows why” “I don’t. Enlighten me” “your feelings for stede fucking bon-“ *GUNSHOT* ARE U SHITTING ME EDWARD NO WE DO BOT SHOOT FRIENDS

OH MY GOD HE MADE FRENCHIE FIRST MATE HOLY SHIT

Oh my god Izzy my poor baby Izzy oh my god how dare you hurt my Izzy

LMAO SWEDE

“FUCK THOSE HAMMIES UP” LMAO

There’s like no way there’s actually anything valuable in that chest

WE GOT TO SEE HER TAKE A NOSE FOR THE NOSE JAR YESSS

OH SHIT INDIGO

“Now give me back my blue shit STEVE”

Susan’s hot

DONT HURT SWEDE

Oh good okay we’re cool

I feel like she’s lying tho

But for now we’re cool

AWW FANG

AWW JIM COMFORTING FANG

“WANNA HEAR THE STORY OF THE WOODEN BOY” AWW

Living for vico using they them for the puppet

“DO THE VOICE” AWW

OMG VICO THATS ICONIC

AWW YAY THEYRE LAUGHING NOW THOSE ARE MY BABIES YAY

Living for buttons reuniting with the ocean

Okay roll credits cheers yall see you next episode