#that's part of why i love broadway so much too. in a really solid show (i'm talking your hadestown vibes) the whole stage comes alive

[novelconcepts]

I really think we as a society don't give enough credit to performers who thrive in an ensemble situation. It's always obvious when an actor is excellent front and center, and we're constantly rewarding that skill set with awards, but god, there's something to be said for the power of a true ensemble piece. People who are so good at reading one another and playing off what they're given, tossing the ball and knowing when to turn it into a grenade. As much fun as it is to watch a solid monologue or a solo show, I always find it so much more thrilling--and so much more authentically lived-in--when there's an ensemble just feeding one another in every single scene. Who do I look at? What is everyone else learning and deciding even from the background? This is what life looks like, and actors who really shine in that environment have really become my favorite to follow.

[blazeofnight]

PotO Italy (Trieste) review - Act 2

We did enter the intermission with high spirits: All I Ask of You did get us interested and on board, and despite some disappointing or confusing choices the first act was overall enjoyable. The solid vocal and acting performances surely didn't hurt, either.

No pictures this time since I'm at work and can't access Instagram, I'll add them later if I remember. You can find the review for Act 1 here.

The same disclaimer applies: I have not seen other replica productions in full, only pictures, but I have seen the West End production in March. I do consider using Broadway/West End/replica productions as the one and true standard to judge non-replicas unfair in general, but I think it's fair to use them as a comparison to try and understand how these changes affect character dynamics and stuff like that, and to help in trying to understand the reasoning behind the choices made.

My visual memory is VERY poor, so if you've seen the show too and notice I remember something wrong please tell me so I can correct it! Also this is a long post, so please consider how much you want to scroll before clicking the read more.

MASQUERADE/WHY SO SILENT

There are a couple of videos of Masquerade floating around, so I believe everyone interested in this specific scene already has seen them. I have to say that the videos and pictures do not capture just how a light, peaceful and joyous moment it is.

After ending Act 1 with ominous red lighting and a lot of sharp shadows, Act 2 opens with a soft diffused light, slightly yellow as to mimic sunlight. In the beginning they turned on the little constellation lights in the ceilings, and it was absolutely beautiful! Then as the song progressed the lighting got a bit stronger and they also used some of the seating are alights, to create this impression of the stage being bigger and almost overflowing towards the audience. For a split second, it did feel as if we too were part of what was going on on stage.

The scene opens as always with Firmin and André covered by cloaks and recognizing each other. André is wearing a regular fancy suit, and Firmin reveals a super poofy and VERY pink dress. I knew about this going in and tried to keep my opinion neutral, I'm happy to report it's not played for laughs beyond the initial reveal (you REALLY do not expect that after seeing André is dressed in a fancy but uncreative way), it really feels as if Firmin thought "Hmmm a fancy dress party, I don't see why I should not wear a nice, pink, huge dress!" and that's it.

The ensemble is dressed in what look like Venetian masks inspired costumes and they get on stage dancing with similarly attired mannequins. The effect is very nice and just the right amount of creepy, the mannequins move very smoothly so at times you really can't tell which figures are actors and which ones are mannequins.

At one point the sea of masks parts and the named characters appear. Madame Giry is dressed in her usual black dress, Meg is dressed like the music box's monkey, and Piangi, Carlotta, Raoul and Christine are dressed in "regular" elegant clothes. I can confirm Christine's dress is white, it looks pale yellow at times due to the lighting being warm for most of the scene. Christine's dress is actually pretty nice from what I could see, especially the lovely, decorated train. I have not checked but it could also be pretty historically accurate in general! Also, it moves beautifully when Christine is picked up by Raoul, I'm not sold on it being white but

There is a moment where Raoul and Christine are alone on the stage, golden confetti start pouring down from the ceiling and it looks extremely pretty, then you see that the ensemble didn't just leave the stage but spilt over into the galleries and near the orchestra pit! Between this and the lighting effects, it does look like the aim of this scene was easing the audience back into the "theatre world" after intermission, if so it does work quite well.

My one complaint is that the second half of Masquerade sounds very slow and I can't figure out why? For the title song getting sped up I do at least have other elements that help guess why, but here I'm completely stumped and it's driving me crazy!

The atmosphere in the scene is extremely relaxed and airy, so the sudden mood change at the Red Death's arrival is very jarring in a good way. I won't lie, I do miss the "traditional" costume, but considering how complex and time-consuming it must be to create and maintain, I do understand why they opted for a simpler solution.

So, the Red Death is just a red, formless cloak holding the huge Don Juan Triumphant manuscript. I actually liked it, it did remind me of the way Death or Destiny/Fate are often represented in illustrations, and it looks like the cloak is made in a velvet-like fabric that made the red even more intense and blood-like. The slow, ominous advance is still very effective and creepy, and when the ensemble falls over the figure only to reveal the cloak is empty it's a nice moment of old-fashioned stage magic.

But wait, Christine is not on stage, so what about the final verse? It turns out Christine was still in the audience, nearby the orchestra pit, made invisible by darkness and our attention being elsewhere. Then she gets suddenly illuminated and we see that the Phantom is actually standing beside her, he says the "your chains are still mine/You will sing for me!" lines, all very effective. I like this staging because it does make you feel that Christine's safety was all just an illusion, the Phantom can get near her whenever he likes and his illusions and tricks make him hard to stop. It makes it more believable that Christine is later willing to put herself at risk to make it all stop despite the huge emotional toll it takes on her, because we are shown just how Raoul could not help her here even if he wanted, despite his promise and willingness to protect her.

The second complaint I have about this scene is that at the very end you can clearly see and hear the Phantom just... running away from Christine and into the wings, which ruins the overall effect a bit. If they find a way to make him disappear more gracefully, then it'd be a perfect way to end the scene.

There's the interlude between Madame Giry and Raoul, and oh boy is Raoul PISSED. Other people have already commented that he doesn't play a super sweet, naive Raoul, but rather a more serious and mature one, and it's nice to see how Bradley portrays him as capable of great tenderness but also of having a spine. He's not politely requesting or pleading with Madame Giry, he's commanding it. This lady is withholding information that could be used to make Christine's life less scary and he won't allow it!

It's not my favourite portrayal of all time, but it fits well with the overall mood and themes and makes for a more tridimensional Raoul which is good in my opinion.

NOTES II/TWISTED EVERY WAY

This scene is set in the same way as Notes I, but since the mood is quite different I found that it being kinda showed in half of the stage wasn't as much of a problem. The stage set is once again angled to create a wall of the managers' office, but this time it gets used as Christine, more and more overwhelmed, leans against it in a dramatic fashion.

A couple of things I noticed: André does a long-ish pause after the first "But why not?" as if he needs a second or two to realize that something's wrong with Christine's refusal, it's a nice touch. Christine starts having her breakdown when everyone is asking her questions, Raoul gets all protective, and when he sings "They can't make you" he's GLARING at the others and physically putting himself between them and Christine (you can hear the quiet menace in his voice perfectly in the audio I took, it's amazing how much emotions Bradley puts in that line). Carlotta has a dark orange dress, which I like less than her green one in Notes I but it would be pretty with a bit more texture, chile Christine is wearing a cute green dress (the colour is a bit of a mix between sage and mint green, similar to the cloak she wears in Wishing).

After the Phantom's letter has been read (Madame GIry keeps silently mouthing the words throughout), Christine says "I can't. I won't do it" in a frankly panicked but determined tone (I don't remember if it's something in the current West End version, but I don't have it on my Original London Cast CD). It's pretty clear during the scene that what happened to the end of Masquerade shook her to the core, and now everything that reminds her of the Phantom or, worse, having to face him directly is a big trigger for her. Amelia has some truly great anguished and conflicted expressions in this scene.

The next part has some nice details: one of the managers (I don't remember who, sorry) bangs his hand on the table during the "We make certain our men are there!" verse, Raoul flips through the Don Juan Triumphant manuscript trying to find something to be used against the Phantom, and there is another perfectly timed longer pause before Raoul, André and Firmin ask Madame Giry to help them during which the three men exchange a meaningful look. Just before Madame Giry's cry of "Madness" turns the attention on her, Carlotta can be seen approaching a very strained Christine and opening her mouth as if to speak to her in a more regular, non-diva way, but then she gets interrupted and nothing comes of it.

Thanks to the way AIAOY has been changed, Raoul's bits in Twisted Every Way sound very sincere and not manipulative as sometimes they risk doing. His change of heart clearly comes 100% from realizing that this is a dangerous plan but Christine clearly can't be happy or even just serene knowing the person she rightfully fears can get to her whenever he wants. Christine's "I know I can't refuse" is truly heartbreaking, there's a sharp, painful intonation that really makes you feel her desperation and how trapped she must feel in this moment.

SITZPROBE

This one plays pretty close to what you can expect, there's not much that can be changed. BUT! Do you remember that Reyer is never seen? In this scene the piano is turned so you don't see him, apart from an admonishing hand when Piangi keeps missing his note. So when the creepy music starts and the piano turns revealing there's no longer anyone behind it, and it's playing on its own... let me tell you, it felt pretty chilling even knowing that the moment was coming!

WISHING YOU WERE SOMEHOW HERE AGAIN

Ok, this and Wandering Child are the scenes in Act 2 that need some work to be more than a vehicle for some nice singing.

Christine is wearing a mint green cloak with sleeves, I don't hate it BUT the sleeves make it bulky and a bit goofy at times. I think a sleeveless cloak works better for this scene since it allows for some more dramatic swishing and looks more elegant, but the one used is serviceable. Oh, no red scarf, but Christine has a red rose she puts...where?

The big issue here is that this scene is painfully empty, there's a projection of silhouettes of tombstones in the background but otherwise, there is NOTHING. Now, listen, I'm not a fan of the giant sarcophagus used in the West End, but having some tasteful fake tombstones, some weeping angels, etc., would go a long way to add visual interest to the scene and make it clearer that Christine is paying homage to her dead father, instead of just leaving a rose on the ground seemingly at random. Have her father's tomb be decorated with, say, an angel playing a musical instrument, maybe a violin, and you're set! and this would also be useful in the next song, so it's a 2x1 deal! Also, it would be nice to see this specific production lean into this scene's gothic aesthetic.

Vocally, as I said elsewhere, Amelia Milo's voice could use a bit more strength but she's not bad at all, and she does put a lot of emotion into the song. She starts mournful, but quickly ramps up the energy and you can really feel that this Christine is so ready to stop clinging to the past and face the future, a new life, that will be different from the one she knew but can make her just as happy if not more.

WANDERING CHILD/BRAVO, MONSIEUR

Ok, we have to talk about the angel wings. I tried to avoid this as long as possible, but the moment has arrived.

Why why why WHY does the Phantom hover while sporting a pair of black angel wings.

I suspect this... thing happens because there are no pyrotechnics in the scene. The use of flames, sparks and the likes in performances is STRICTLY regulated in Italy, especially in indoor venues, so I think these were added to have the Phantom do something "cool" in the scene instead of using the skull cane spray sparks everywhere.

The issue is, they are so random and don't fit the aesthetic of the rest of the musical at all! I would LOVE if there was a suggestion of wings: the Phantom appearing in front of an angel statue, or the wings being a shadow, so you're left wondering if this is Christine's suggestion showing itself to us. As it is now, it is something that throws you out of the show's immersion and that's the second worst crime a musical can commit in my eyes (the first one is being boring).

And another thing is, it is a nice effect, and it works well, I can see it fitting in nicely if they went in a different direction when it comes to themes and overall aesthetic. It's not bad per se, it's just misplaced.

The start of the scene, before the wings appear, isn't bad. Apart from still being empty, the fact that Christine is in a confused emotional state due to the stuff that happened between the end of Masquerade and now and so she falls again under the Phantom's influence is made quite clear, she even falls on her knees similarly to how she did in The Mirror. But then the wings come out, the Phantom starts to hover, Raoul arrives and everything gets confused. I admit I really don't know if something happened and I missed it, or if I was just confused by the scene in general. you could even tell the audience's applause sounded a bit uncertain.

So yeah, that's two other scenes that will need a bit of work to be made good. Luckily Wishing You Were Somehow Here Again just needs a proper background, and that in turn can help a bit with Wandering Child.

DON JUAN TRIUMPHANT/THE POINT OF NO RETURN

There are some interesting changes in this one, so first let's get the small stuff out of the way.

There is only one "Secure!" being shouted, and while there is the usual Phantom's projected voice effect you can tell that it's achieved differently since there are no speakers scattered across the theatre. The second one is a technical limitation so it's understandable and it's still cool, just a bit less impressive, but having 2-3 "Secure!" coming from the main doors is a very cool effect that I absolutely loved in London, it helps so much with the immersion and I wish they'd kept it. Also, the sharpshooter is not in the orchestra pit, but rather in one of the other boxes of the prop stage, which makes sense given the staging.

Sooo, let's get to the Don Juan Triumphant bit and the infamous cloak. First of all, I want to make clear that I've never been 100% on board with the classic disguise. It always looked to me out of place in the play-within-a-play, it is definitely something that the Phantom would use in the "real" world, but clashes with the clothing of the other characters we see in DJT and doesn't really make sense if you assume that Aminta is expecting yes a secret meeting, but not to be deceived. One could argue that the Phantom insisted the costume be this way, but then this would be suspicious and I'd find it strange that no one suspected it would be needed for something. So, in short, I don't dislike the classic costume but I don't really love it either because it's clear it's a costume made for us, the real audience, instead of the fictional audience/play.

I don't love the hat+cloak combo, either, but it makes sense in the way the scene is set. The atmosphere is quite convivial, the ensemble is not only setting the table but some folks (Passarino included) are sitting at it, it looks like they all just finished conspiring and laying the plot. The costumes aren't super elaborate, but I think they worked well in conveying that in the scene there are folks of different social extraction and ways of life.

Passarino's hat and cloak work well to signify that he's a dashing young man, yes, but he's also a working servant: these are believable attire for someone who has to travel or spend time outside, they do tell you something about this character that we see for a handful of seconds, but if we were watching the actual play it would be important to get a nuanced portray of the character!

So yeah, while I don't love this costume? It does look like something made for the play-within-the-play, not something made for PotO, if this makes sense. I do have some issues with the colour, it does work well with Aminta's red and white and it's an ochre yellow that does photograph horribly but isn't too bad in person. And yes, it's very wide and in a stiffer fabric than the classic cloak so it looks clumsier when the Phantom is standing still, but it looks fine when he's moving. Maybe making it in black and a lighter fabric could work, I'd personally love for it to be a dark red similar to Red Death's cloak but then it would be too similar in tone to Aminta's dress (where the red or pink paired with the white is Symbolyc and thus important).

So, yeah, it's not the best, it is a bit weird at first if you're used to the classic black cloak, but it makes so much sense if you consider this is a costume diegetic to the DJT play! Aminta's dress is also simple, a bit of a "generic young country girl", but it has a silhouette that's quite flattering on Amelia and it does its job of representing the young, innocent girl ready to embrace passion etc.

Ok, I think that's enough words spent talking about something that's not the actual music and singing of this piece! The Point of no Return starts sung by Paingi up until "You've decided, decided", then the Phantom takes over and Ramin does his "singing imitating Piangi's accent" thing for a while, before dropping it. I saw people complaining about this, it looks like during the first night the switch was a bit later, but as it is now it works. I think it could be improved by making the change a bit more gradual as it is for the various notes. I did see a lady that was clearly at her first viewing of the show making an "Oh!" surprised face when the voice change happened, so I think it works especially well for first-timers that don't know what will happen, but only that something is bound to happen.

Please don't ask me to tell you stuff about the blocking because I was distracted by everything going on to really take note of it beyond lots of touching, very sensual vibes overall, and a nice bit of leg from Christine at one point. A notable difference is that Christine does realize what's going on only at the end of the song. I do like the timing because it matches with the last "We passed the point of no return" and the music's shift. The song doesn't end abruptly because the Phantom has been unmasked, but quietly and sadly because now Christine knows and the Phantom has to choose what to do. And the Phantom chooses to reveal himself to her (not the unmasking, just taking off the hat).

Raoul jumps onstage, along with the police officer, and Christine moves in order to protect the Phantom. She's clearly terrified but still doesn't want to see him shot dead. What follows is, simply put, one of the saddest All I Ask of You reprises I've ever heard or watched.

I always kinda wondered, what exactly is the Phantom's aim here? Does he just want to share the stage with her? Does he plan to kidnap her again? Does he believe that if only Christine sees the (creepy) opera he's written for her and sings the (creepy) longing song he's written she'll just fall for him as if nothing ever happened? Does he have a plan at all?

I am happy to report that in this staging there is one, simple reply: this Phantom is utterly, completely broken. His music is no longer enough, he needs/wants his music AND Christine to perform him. He wants her to see him, to acknowledge him, yes she does recognize him first in the scene, but he still has the chance to just get out of there. Instead, he reveals himself because he so desperately hopes, against all odds, that singing again together with Cristine the music he composed for her will have changed her mind, made her see how much he cares, made her feel how he feels for her etc. It was honestly a heartbreaking moment to witness, but yeah reading "the Phantom reveals himself at the end of PonR" and seeing it in context is VERY different. 

The impression I got is that the Phantom spent six months spiralling into depression and THIS is the best he could come up with to try and make Christine speak to him again. He's desperate, and he knows it. You can feel it in his voice, you can see it in the way he's calm, almost resigned until the unmasking. For him, it all boils down to Christine's reply, to her accepting him or not. I don't think he's even stopped to consider what to do after she replies because that will be such a defining, world-changing moment. and I think that just for a moment the Phantom allows himself hope, the tiniest bit of it. Christine is clearly scared to death, but she's not running away. She's even protecting him, in a way. And then she unmasks him.

DOWN ONCE MORE/TRACK DOWN THIS MURDERER

The gondola does not disappear in the wings, so there's no quick change and Christine is in her AMinta dress. The Phantom does give her the veil, putting it on her head when he sees she's not doing it herself, and gives her what looks like a wedding dress but Christine is understandably thinking about her current predicament and when the Phantom sees she does not intend to wear it he just tosses it away and gives her the bouquet instead. I do like that there's no implication of Christine being forced to change, and it does keep intact the fact that the Phantom did have a wedding dress, veil and bouquet prepared for her.

When singing "A mask, my first unfeeling scrap of clothing" Ramin raised a hand to touch the disfigured side in a way that is just heartbreaking. I know I'm using this word a lot, but I feel it's true for this portrayal: a very physical Phantom with a lot of self-loathing, a lot of repressed emotions that get directed inwards with no way or no one to help express them, accompanied by the occasional outburst when they get simply too much to be repressed any longer. Isolated and emotionally stunted is the name of the game here, but in a way that makes you see just how deprived of regular socialization and company he was during his life.

Another interesting thing I noticed is that when Christine sang "It's in your soul that the true distortion lies", in the split second before noticing Raoul's arrival the Phantom raised a hand and was starting to reply to Christine, and I'd really, really like to know how he'd try to get himself out of that one! It was a blink-and-you-'ll-miss-it moment, but I found it interesting that this Phantom's reaction to Christine's accusation was not dismay or anger, but rather trying to talk it out.

Then our boy Raoul appears in all his damp, well-toned and bare-chested glory! Bradley Jaden is quite ripped, I think by now we've all seen the pictures, and let me tell you they do not do him justice. He's also barefoot, and he stumbles on the scene while very convincingly gasping after the swim in the underground lake.

The suspenders are still on because they are clearly used when he gets hanged by the Phantom, since in this scene he is literally hanging, his feet a good 50 cm or so from the ground. My guess is that the "Y" part of the suspenders on the back latches onto some kind of support built into the Phantom's bedframe to take pressure off the neck or something like that. It still looks extremely uncomfortable, and Bradley was clearly tensing a lot of muscles to maintain the position. So yeah, apart from the eye candy, it looks like a challenging thing to do while you're also singing and acting. I still have no explanation for why they did this instead of dampening his shirt, I guess they took a good look at Bradley Jaden's pecs and thought "Oh people will love that!" and asked him if he minded spending the last 10 minutes onstage half naked? I really don't know.

Raoul was convincingly rational (as much as possible) in this scene, he did get angry but it was also clear he was trying to keep his cool and reason if possible because his #1 priority was: to help Christine get out of there. And I think this creates a beautiful dynamic in this scene, where Christine starts angry and scared but then sees that Raoul is trying to keep his promise and jumped into a freezing lake to reach her and be at her side despite the danger. And this in turn gives her the strength to face her fear, which is now not just hypothetical but becoming very real, and find the will she needs to save Raoul in turn. They can save each other because they have built a reciprocal trust and do actively support each other during most of the second act.

Unfortunately, there is the choking. For those who don't know what I'm referring to, when Raoul comes in Christine tries to run to him and the Phantom stops her, and ends up choking her a bit before realizing what he's doing and letting her go. I really didn't like it in this instance. I think there are some actors that can make it work if they play a very aggressive, wounded Phantom that lashes out at the world, but I am having trouble fitting it in this portrayal where his negative emotions are clearly almost all directed inwards and where the Phantom tends to be quite gentle with Christine. Also, not only is he a murderer (twice), kidnapper, damaged property, and maybe kinda drugged Christine, but he's also physically abusive. Cool cool cool. I'd rather like it if they removed it.

When the Phantom realizes what he's doing he immediately lets Christine go (at least) and Christine tries to run to Raoul's side but he gets hanged by the Phantom. Christine gets PISSED in this version, while the Phantom is a bit more on the cooler, controlled side, and Raoul seems to sincerely regret his actions since they only made the situation worse. I have to say that even despite the distracting shirtlessness of Raoul, having him actually hanging instead of just… being mildly inconvenienced by a noose clearly big enough for his head to pass through does make it all a bit more believable. I do buy that this guy is really in a situation where he can't free himself.

I also really liked the "Angel of music, you deceived me /I gave my mind blindly" delivery: it's not angry but rather deeply mournful and regretful, since now it's Christine's turn to realize that her trust in the Angel of Music because of her clinging desperately to any scrap of her father's presence/memory is what led to all of this. In a way, this version underscores Christine's growth as she tries to become her own person without the influences of her father or of the Phantom guiding but also limiting her, it's one of the main themes and I liked how her realization is delivered here connects it clearly to All I Ask of You and Wandering Child conceptually.

So the big moment, the choice, arrives. In the preceding moments Raoul struggled even more frantically and now is losing consciousness, so when the Phantom delivers his ultimatum (a very weary, exhausted ultimatum) Christine just looks at Raoul one last time (she thinks) and this gives her the strength to decide and act.

After the kiss, the way the Phantom stands still for a while before sloooowly walking to Raoul and cutting the lasso is… I don't really know how to explain it. You take all the defeat, resignation and brokenness of when he revealed himself to Christine at the end of PonR and double or triple them, then add in all the self-loathing he displayed during the rest of the musical. He does now realize with crystal clear certainty that he'll never, ever have what he wants in the way he wants it, and this time he can't blame the world but only himself and his actions. He's beyond broke, beyond everything really. Weary and with nothing left to look forward to.

Raoul collapses to the ground, and Christine runs to him and physically helps him up and to the boat. No elegant, composed sitting: here Raoul and Christine are physically and psychologically exhausted, so there's no time for all of that as they almost stumble into the boat and it's the Phantom that shoves it away, sending them towards their freedom and out of the stage.

The Phantom sounds so distressed in the bit just before this, and the fact that the last "go now and leave me" is sung when he's alone on stage, having physically pushed away the one person that, despite everything and despite making the choice under extreme duress, was capable of staying beside him… ooof. You really feel that he has nothing left now, and maybe for the first time ever he truly wants to be alone, to disappear completely. Which of course makes the brief Masquerade reprise even more devastating than usual.

Now, the other big controversial change: the ring return. The Phantom is facing the other way when Christine comes in. It looks like she's debating whether to approach him or not, and then when he sings "Christine, I love you" she just leaves the ring and silently leaves. The Phantom hears something, turns, sees the ring and picks it up, and in that moment from off stage the All I Ask of You final reprise is heard, accompanied by a soft, golden light coming from above showing that Raoul and Christine are making their way to the surface and to the (metaphorical) light.

Why no interaction during the ring return? In this production, they are leaning a lot on the Phantom as being a toxic influence/relationship for Christine, not without its allure and charms, but also very dangerous and controlling. And when Christine sees him kill because he didn't get his way… well, she gets it quite quickly and actively tries to avoid him, but realizes that she's still pretty vulnerable to him and his influence. And I think not interacting with him at the very end represents her cutting off a toxic person, at this point any interaction would be dangerous to her, and an unkindness to him.

She knows she's still vulnerable to him, that despite everything he did she can still care about him because she's just that kind of person. At the same time, the Phantom did the morally right thing by pushing her away from him and it's clear it took him every ounce of willpower he had and he might not be able to do so again. So, when Christine hears him declaring his love to an empty room, she doesn't risk wasting all the effort they BOTH put in (plus Raoul, who literally risked his life for her) to say one last goodbye.

It's a big change, it does change the ending and their dynamic a lot, so I get it if you don't like it. But it makes sense, it has its place in the narrative of this specific production, and since it makes such a difference I think if you're used to the "regular" ring return you need to experience it after getting through all the previous emotional beats in order to be in the right mind space to accept it.

When the Phantom realizes that Christine is truly gone, he slowly makes his way to the bed and covers himself with the sheets as the ensemble (led by Madame Giry) bursts in. Meg approaches the covers and pulls them away, revealing an empty bed save from the Phantom's mask, which she brings to her mother who looks at it somberly, and they both raise it for the classic final "shot".

I am ambivalent about this choice. On one hand, I think it looks a bit silly and could probably be implemented better, on the other hand I think it's meant to be a reference to the Phantom letting himself die in the book, and I did like it as a metaphor for his death, and having the ensemble kinda witnessing it and him not being so alone in his final moments.

I've decided to make a different post for my opinion about the singing performances and my overall opinion about what works, what doesn't, and so on, which can also be a TL;DR of sorts since I realize not everyone is interested in a song-by-song comparison.

For now, I'll just say that if you go in expecting West End or Broadway levels of opulence you will be disappointed by the stage sets, costumes, etc., which are rarely memorable, at times flops, more often are ok and serviceable (meaning they are not distracting and don't get in the way of the performance, even if they're not anything special).

If you want to see the story and characterization you already know, then you can watch one of the tens of bootlegs available and enjoy the subtle changes each actor brings to the characters (I know I do!), but if you'd like a different take on the main characters and key scenes then this will get your brain going.

If you go in with a preset idea of what you want to get out of the experience, chances are there'll be areas where it underdelivers and interesting stuff you might not notice while if you go in without trying to force your expectations on the show, then you'll probably come away with some stuff you liked, some stuff that you're not so sure about but is interesting or might work with a change or two, and yes, some stuff you didn't like at all, or left you confused, or is just plain weird.

Overall it was a fun and interesting experience, the vocal performances were great, the acting choices captivating and I went home with some new interpretations of the main characters while thinking about if I can make a trip to Milan in October to see it again. Despite some major flaws, it is doing something interesting and engaging in its own way and I'd love to see it again knowing what to expect.

[arqueete]

I saw Spring Awakening at a local college and this one was really *chef's kiss* for someone who has seen Spring Awakening live too many times. Lots of interesting little choices and details to appreciate.

The individual performances were mostly just alright (with a few standouts) but I find that that isn't actually that important to me when I see Spring Awakening. As long as the singing is in tune, the acting is earnest and enthusiastic, and the direction feels true to the themes of the show--and I felt like this cast and crew was solid on all those points--it doesn't really bother me if it feels "amateur." (I mean, it is amateur after all and amateur theater is still fun.)

It's clear that they took bits inspiration from the original production of Spring Awakening on Broadway and the Deaf West revival (not including deaf characters and sign language--BUT I do think there may have been some sign language incorporated in the choreography of The Guilty Ones? A nice touch, if so.) There are things I love about both versions so I really enjoyed that.

The choreography for Bitch of Living was really fun. The boys all had notebooks they were writing in in the classroom scene, and then during the song they would hold up the notebooks each with a letter written on them to spell out words alongside the lyrics, like B-I-T-C-H obviously, but also I-T-C-H in Moritz's verse, or T-H-I-C in Ernst's verse, or B-U-T-T in Hanschen's, or T-I-T-S in Georg's. They also only had one handheld microphone--the one Melchior was using in All That's Known, which he pulls out and hands to Moritz, and then gets passed around to each boy. I loved this visual of this gift of angsty music being passed around.

Similarly! In My Junk, as the girls sang their solos, Melchior came out and would hold up the microphone for each, also giving them an opportunity to make flirtatious poses with him. In the latter part of the song, there was a lot of this between Melchior and Wendla. Even though in reality they don't really interact until later, I thought this was a nice connection being drawn between them for the audience.

When Wendla said that her mama said she can't go to the wedding, Anna dramatically collapsed on the ground like Wendla, you're killing me.

There was also a great bit where Fraulein Grossenbustenhalter drops a handkerchief and bends over to pick it up.

When Melchior says his, "But when you lie here..." line, it's with this mischievous sort of grin like, come oooon Wendla, I know you're not really going to go! And she smiles back as she agrees to stay. It was interesting to see their interactions done more playfully than I'm used to.

I absolutely loved this The Dark I Know Well. They really had Martha and Ilse moving around, using the microphone stand, and it felt much more like a rock number a la And Then There Were None, and I was like... hell yeah. The girls really don't tend to get moments like that in the show typically and why shouldn't they?

As the song built up in the end they had the other female characters and ensemble step out to gather behind Martha and Ilse--as well as the Adult Women. It got me thinking about the adult women in this show and their experiences with sex in that time period, even just within a typical marriage, and how that affects what they are willing or able to share with their children.

The Mirror-Blue Night featured the backdrop lit up blue but Melchior holding a yellow lantern and the boys having small yellow flashlights (I think drawing from the lit up fingers in the Deaf West version of this song), and then the hayloft was lit in this warm light as well. I thought this looked fantastic and really made the hayloft feel like this warm refuge in the mirror-blue night.

Left Behind had several interesting things going on, like the most literal representation I've ever seen of the gravesite (as a pile of dirt.) Melchior looked at Moritz's father intensely and Hanschen reached out and put a hand on his shoulder like a subtle restraint--which I do think makes sense for Hanschen's don't-rock-the-boat character.

At the end of the scene it was just Melchior and Ilse... and Moritz, who Melchior stared at until Ilse gently took his arm and lead him away. I'm not a fan of productions doing things like this. I think it's a bit too soon for us to see some representation of Moritz again--not like when we see him in Those You've Known.

It's been literally over a decade since the show added Melchior into Whispering and still every time I'm like what is happening???

When Ilse came out at the end, as she neared the end of her introduction, she reached down and grabbed a flower on a grave and held it up like she was considering how it would look in her hair. I thought this was a nice bit of whimsy leading into the rest of the cast coming out and greeting each other warmly with side-hugs and grabbing hands and spinning around and it was so... sweet and joyful. I hadn't felt emotional up until that point but I got teary-eyed then.

I had a great time. It's been several years since I saw the show live last and this reminded me of why I like it so much.

[spaceorphan18]

have you ever read a detailed post about the glee cast’s singing voices? like all about their technique and stuff? reading your reaction to the ‘vocal coach reacts to glee’ video makes me want to know more!

Hmmmm, not really! Not from a professional vocalist POV, I don’t think.  (That I’m aware of.  This does remind me there was one vocal coach in fandom, and she hated Blaine, and I wasn’t too fond of her, or her analysis, so I won’t point you in that direction.) 

My background is in music, but not in vocal performance.  But I can give you a quick rundown of cast’s musical abilities if you like, though they won’t be huge on the technical side of it.  

ETA: I started this a while ago before I started doing the music retrospective - I’ll probably try to explore a little more as I do those.   If you guys want more conversation about one person in particular, let me know! 

But for now... 

*

Matthew Morrison: Is a classically trained musician with a very good voice.  It’s a shame Will was such a tool, because Matthew Morrison was very talented, had the ability to do a lot of great things with his voice.  People joke about his rapping -- but I think this stemmed from the issue that his background is in musical theater -- which teaches you a cleaner and more traditional way of singing -- opposed to a pop or rap style.  He doesn’t have the grit that rap often has, which makes it a little too much like a Kid’s Bop version of something.  When singing musical theater, though, he really shined. 

A number that showcases ability: Make ‘Um Laugh

A number that isn’t so great: Ice Ice Baby

*

Lea Michele: Lea does have a very good and solid voice.  She’s also been classically trained.  The one drawback is that it hinders her a bit on pop music, she lacks some of the grittiness often needed on a lot of the pop songs.  She also starts to lose some of her classic training as the show goes on (which I think is a shame) so that she can get some of the shine off her voice to make a transition to pop music.  

She has one vocal tick that drives me crazy, though -- she has a tendency to slide into her notes instead of hitting them dead on, which gets worse as the show goes on, and it makes her sound a little screech-y at times.  But for the most part -- she is really good. 

A number that showcases ability: Don’t Rain on My Parade

A number that isn’t so great: Ooops...I Did It Again

*

Amber Riley: The cool thing about Amber is that you get to hear her grow as a musician as the show goes on.  She had already started to get vocal lessons before the show started, but at the beginning, she was still a bit raw and unrefined in her technique.  But you can tell she did practice, and her voice is developed beautifully as the show goes on.  She was one of the best, well rounded vocalists on the show.  She had a good handle on pop and R&B music, but she could sing musical theater rather clearly, too.  She has great breath support - and can belt numbers out while still retaining the quality.  Can’t say enough good thing about Amber’s voice. 

A number that showcases ability: Someday We’ll Be Together

A number that isn’t so great: Sweet Transvestite (It’s not bad - but it’s my least favorite Mercedes solo.) 

*

Cory Monteith: Cory wasn’t a vocalist.  And, to be completely honest, I thought it was some kind of joke when they introduced him as some kind of hidden musical gem when Will hears him singing the showers.  He did really well with classic rock that’s allows not only for a weaker voice - but is often not as technically hard.  And I have to wonder if Cory got lessons, because he did get a lot better as the show went on, and I think his season 4 work is great! 

I will say that sometimes they pushed his voice a little too far.  A lot of times songs were either too high for his range and he often sounded like he was straining.  (The most notable of which is A House is Not a Home - which is far too high for him.)  That said - I think he did reasonably well along side Lea - mostly because often sang pop duets.  

A number that showcases ability: I’ve Gotta Be Me

A number that isn’t so great: Can’t Fight This Feeling Anymore

*

Chris Colfer: Chris is such an interesting study due to the uniqueness of his voice.  He’s got a huge range both in terms of genre and literal range of voice.  He can sing quite a few octaves.  He’s got a great, clear sound, too, which is why he’s great with theater numbers.  Interestingly, Chris’s voice did drop over the years, and while I know people love his higher range, he has a gorgeous lower range that wasn’t used as often (and is often my favorite.) 

The one (nitpicky) issue was that Chris’s voice ended up getting pigeon-holed.  I know singing Diva-Broadway songs was his schtick - but it would have been nice to hear him sing a bigger variety of songs.  He wasn’t the strongest on non-ballad pop music, but they also didn’t give him that very often.  

There’s also the fascinating unusualness in that, Chris could really sing duets very well with people -- but in group numbers, his voice sticks out like a sore thumb, and he was often left out of some of the more general songs because of it.  His voice just doesn’t texture very well - which is why I get why they did what they did.  

A number that showcases ability: Being Alive

A number that isn’t so great: I’ll Remember

*

Kevin McHale: I feel like people are often surprised when they sit down and think about it, but Kevin has a great voice.  He has a solid range, and he’s able to do pop music very well (I believe it helps that he was in a professional boy band for years.)  Not sure if people noticed - but he’s often the lead on group numbers that don’t need to be related to specific story or character points.  Which is a bummer for Artie’s story - but if you’re a fan of Kevin’s voice, you get a lot to choose from.  

Kevin was also able to handle a lot of the musical demands that I think some of the other males weren’t? He’s a much better singer than Cory - and could handle leading a full number.  His voice isn’t as unique as Chris’s and can texture really well.  In addition he was fairly versatile.  He might have been the best rapper the show had, lol. 

A number that showcases ability: For Once In My Life

A number that isn’t so great: Addicted to Love (personal taste choice - I just don’t like the song.) 

*

Jenna Ushkowitz: Jenna is another one who is classically trained.  She has a strong, solid voice, which was unfortunately not showcased all that well on the show, and because of that, I’m not sure how she does on a wide variety of music.  I do think she sounds a little generic - but not helping is lack of being featured.  

A number that showcases ability: I Don’t Know How To Love Him

A number that isn’t so great: Gangum Style (She does fine - but the fact that they made her do it in the first place...) 

*

Dianna Agron: The interesting thing about Dianna is that she has a really nice low female voice.  The fact that they never gave her any punk or harder rock was really a shame, because I think she would have done really well with that.  The funny thing is that, more so in the beginning, they show tried to make her sing songs that fit her character - but weren’t necessarily great for her voice.  I feel like it wasn’t until late season 2 did they start really using her voice for the better.  

A number that showcases ability: Never Can Say Goodbye

A number that isn’t so great: It’s A Man’s, Man’s, Man’s World

*

Mark Salling: Mark had a really solid voice - that often lent itself well to folk and acoustic really well.  He was good with softer pop and classic rock, and the show showcased that pretty well.  I think, in general, Mark was a much better vocalist than actor, and the show often picked good music for him to sing - which helped with his character.  I don’t have a whole lot to say, only that I think he was underrated as a vocalist, but I get it - with all the other baggage that comes with talking about Mark. 

A number that showcases ability: No Surrender 

A number that isn’t so great: Fight For Your Right (to Party) (I don’t think it’s bad - I just hate this song.) 

*

Naya Rivera: Naya is a little tricky.  I think she has a good, smoky sound to her voice that makes her excellent at things like pop and R and B.  (Shame she didn’t have a good jazz number to do on the show - she would have been great at that.)  I think she was really versatile, though, and handled her Broadway numbers really well.  I do think she was somewhat pinched and nasal at times - and while I do think this was a stylistic choice, to me it’s not my favorite type of vocal sound.  But I do think she was really good at the numbers she was given, and was one of the most talented female vocalists on the show. 

A number that showcases ability: Back to Black

A number that isn’t so great: Alfie (I think I may dislike the song more than her singing on it.) 

*

Heather Morris: Heather wasn’t a singer, and I do think it showed at times.  She often had to have her voice autotuned more than anyone else on the show.  That said - she did do Britney Spears really well, and I think she deserves credit for that.  

A number that showcases ability: I’m a Slave 4 U

A number that isn’t so great: Dinosaur

*

Chord Overstreet: Chord’s background is in country - and that shows a bit through his singing - he’s got a bit of twang in his voice, but it’s not necessarily a bad thing.  He’s a fun singer.  I don’t think the show knew exactly what to do with him (voice or character) but there’s a lightness to his singing that makes him easily adaptable to pretty much anything you throw at him. 

A number that showcases ability: Red Solo Cup (You think I’m joking - but I think this is the most fun Chord has singing a song.) 

A number that isn’t so great: Girls on Film (I think just by default of me liking everything else better.) 

*

Darren Criss: Ah, Darren, where to even start.  The thing about Darren is that he may not be the strongest singer, his voice is a little wobbly at times, and his range is somewhat limited, but his showmanship is just completely beyond nearly everyone else.  Darren has the unique ability to draw you in with his singing and hold you captive.  There are technically better singers on the show - but Darren just has this amazing ability to really sell a performance.  And I do love his voice, even if there are some limitations to it.  I really could gush about Darren’s performance abilities, but I’ll refrain... 

A number that showcases ability: Teenage Dream (Both Versions) 

A number that isn’t so great: Piano Man (Which isn’t bad - I just think the show had done it better, and it’s a rare time that felt like Darren was kind of phoning it in.) 

*

A quick run down of others, but first a quick aside - as they started adding people in, vocal ability starts being a factor.  I think a lot of the newer characters could sing better than they could act, which was both helpful and a hinderance.  I think we began to get more solid musical numbers as the show went on, but sometimes acting wasn’t always top notch - and across the board, old and new, hitting a combo of acting and singing ability didn’t always happen.  

Harry Shum Jr.: Not really a singer - but the show often played to his strengths, and his few songs played off the fact that he wasn’t a great singer to great aplomb.  

Jane Lynch: Can hold a tune, even if her voice isn’t the best - is really great at musical comedy. 

Jayma Mays: She has more singing ability than the show allowed to showcase, however, she’s another one whose voice was really unique, and doesn’t texture very well.  

Damien McGinty: Is actually a very good singer.  However, he’s very generic, too - which makes him a little on the bland side. 

Sam Larsen: I think he was fine - I don’t think he sang enough on the show for me to make much of an impression one way or the other. 

Alex Newel: Fucking Fantastic! Alex might be one of the strongest vocalists on the show - has great range, energy, and vocal control.  

Melissa Benoist: Her voice tends to lean on the pop-ier side, but it’s a solid voice, and her work on the show was pretty good.  

Jacob Artist: Has a strong voice, and could sing genres that weren’t often featured on the show (like hip-hop and R&B).  

Blake Jenner: His voice is fine, but like Damien McGinty, it’s generic and a little bland. 

Becca Tobin: She has a very quirky voice that brings in a different and unique sound.  They didn’t use her much, though, so it’s hard to comment. 

Noah Guthrie: An amazing singer, has a really unique sound, but is able to do blend in well with others.  

Samantha Ware: Another amazing singer.  She’s in full control and can do really great things with it. 

Billy Lewis Jr: Has a good, solid voice.  Not as strong as Guthrie, or some of the other guys, but he’s a lot of fun to watch. 

Laura Dreyfuss: Like Becca Tobin - has a uniqueness to her vocal quality that makes it stand out a little, but she’s still a solid singer. 

Marshall Williams: His vocal ability is okay.  It’s better than his acting ability.  I’m slightly confused how this dude got cast, tbh.  

[six-costume-refs]

Not costume related but do you think Broadway should announce when the alts are on (if they know in advance?) I'm dying to see Keirsten in any role and while a surprise alt cover is great I know I would definitely get myself a to the theatre if there was a guarantee

I'd love if they would have more solid alternate dates or officially announce things like Mallory Maedke/Keirsten Hodgens being fairly consistent weekend alts for Seymour! I do agree that it can be an incentive for some ticket sales; I think it may not be as much as some people expect bc realistically there aren’t that many repeat attendees, but there are far more repeat attendees going to see alts for Six (even if it’s still a very small number) then there are for most shows. There are a few concerns for productions in terms of things changing, though.

They mostly don't want to promise that anyone will ever be on. It's just too unpredictable. Even if we know, for example, that Abby Mueller will be on vacation and Keirsten Hodgens is meant to cover her on this particular date, there's always a chance that Mallory Maedke might have to go on instead (or vise versa). Then throw in unplanned covers as well and things get complicated. Shows with consistent alt dates (for instance, an alt who is always on for a role on Sunday matinees) usually do announce those, but they also usually put a “we cannot guarantee the performance of any actor” disclaimer. That’s really going to be one of the main concerns with the production itself. If they as a production announce alt dates in advance and then those alts aren’t on or aren’t on in those roles, audience members will request refunds etc on the basis that it wasn’t what was promised (and yeah, they have and do and will continue to do so even with those disclaimers). It just gets really complicated for the production, even with those disclaimers. That’s part of why a lot of shows, like Six Broadway, leave it up to the actors themselves to share those dates in advance. The actors aren’t responsible for selling the tickets; the show is. That means that if an actor posts that they’ll be on for xyz show and then plans change, the production can basically say that they didn’t make that announcement and therefore it’s not their liability if plans changed etc!

There are more nuances and factors there that go into play! But that’s one reason why they don’t that I think a lot of theatre fans may not be familiar with, so hopefully that’s interesting or helpful!

[babbushka]

Hi! I love your writing and have read everything on your page at least 3 times. I was wondering if you could do something with Pale where he’s been super busy for a few weeks and hasn’t had a whole lot of quality time with the reader and tries to make up for it with a really nice day spent together. Could have smut in it or not, up to you!

Thank you and P.S. you are also so great at being inclusive with your writing. It’s so difficult to find fanfics that make me feel included as a black woman. Thank you so so so much and be safe!

A/N: Hello my dear friend! Thank you so much for sending this request in and for your kind words. I hope that you enjoy the little something that I've written up, and that wherever you are that you're able to stay safe too!

1.2k, no warnings, just fluff :)

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It’s late in the morning, you can tell just by the sounds. Before your eyes are open, before you’re even really awake, the sounds of the apartment complex in which you live, and the little city surrounding it come to life. Traffic on the streets down below, doors opening and closing around you, people shuffling off to their jobs all make you stir in your slumber. The birds have already sung their morning songs, so it’s the lingering smell of coffee in the air and sunshine in front of your eyelids that coax you awake.

Turning on your side, you roll over into something hard, solid, sturdy. Something big and wide and warm, that has you instantly smiling, grinnin’ so damn hard before your eyes are even open that you know you gotta look like an idiot.

“Mornin’ sweetheart.” A deep rumbling voice presses a kiss to your cheek, and you don’t give him the opportunity of pullin’ away, before your arms wind around his neck and keep him close to you, smilin’ smilin’ smilin’.

“Pale?” You sigh dreamily as you finally blink yourself all the way awake, letting your vision focus on the playful smirk of your very own VSOP, who scoffs at the rhetorical question.

“No it’s the milkman -- ‘course it’s me. Who else do you think I’d be? You got a bunch of other boyfriends comin’ over and sleepin’ in our bed?” He smiles when he kisses you, his thick Jersey accent always a little heavier in the morning, and you chuckle as you stretch.

“Shut up, you know that ain’t true.” You snuggle back into the mattress, gettin’ a good look at him, something that’s become a rare sight these last couple of days, and you tell him as much, “I’m just surprised to see you here. You’ve been gone the past week whenever I wake up.”

Pale sits on the edge of the bed and rubs at the back of his neck. Work has been kickin’ his fuckin’ ass for comin’ up on ten days straight now, and he had hoped that you weren’t gettin’ pissed at him, thinkin’ he was trying to run out on you or nothin’. In fact, it’s been quite the opposite, he’s been workin’ his ass off to be able to spoil you rotten.

“I know babygirl, I know. But get this, your old man finally gets some time off and I’m spendin’ the whole day makin’ it up to you. I got it all planned out, see.” Pale’s fingers walk up your sternum and pluck at the gold chain that rests against your sleep warm skin, toying with the way it sparkles in the sunlight.

You’re naked, because you always tend to sleep naked when you’re with Pale, save for the jewelry he gives you. You’ve never taken the chain off, not since the day he gave it to you, something that you just know he’s got to be eyein’.

“Why don’t you come closer and tell me all about it?” You pat the empty space next to you, the soft white sheets turned a creamy golden color from the way the sunlight streams in through the curtains.

“Nah nah nah, you gotta come here.” Pale shakes his head, he’s fully fuckin’ dressed after all, only needin’ to put on his shoes before he’s ready to walk out the door.

“No, I don’t want to.” You on the other hand, just woke up, and aren’t in the mood to get up just yet.

“Why not?”

“I’m cozy.”

Pale looks at you with a deadpan scowl, and you only look back at him with a big cheesy grin, and eventually, after a little bit of silent suffering, Pale grumbles as he slides his blazer off his arms, shucks back the covers and climbs back into bed with you.

“Alright but look we can’t stay in bed all day, you hear me? We got shit to do. I got it all planned out. We’ve got breakfast in the city and then the morning in the park, I’m takin’ you shoppin’. It’s been too long since I’ve seen you in somethin’ new. And don’t fuckin’ argue with me about how you don’t need nothin’, I know you don’t, but I don’t need half the shit I got -- I get it because I like it, and I get you shit because I like you, end of discussion.”

One of the things you always loved about your man was how he just went on and on and on, letting you snuggle up against his solid, muscular chest while he does. You rest your head on his pec instead of the pillow, and at once, his arms encircle you and he presses small kisses to the top of your head as he continues,

“Then I figure we built up an appetite so I got us a reservation for lunch in Central, and then you’re gonna put one of the new outfits because we gotta go to Broadway for dinner before a show, and then maybe, if you’re good, I’m gonna fuck your brains out nice and slow, right here in this bed when we come home. Whattaya say sweetheart, sound like a good deal?”

“Hmm, I can’t think of anything better honey, you sure know how to treat a lady.” You chuckle, letting yourself relax against his sturdy frame.

“You’re goddamned right I do.” Pale scoffs, before lightly patting at your cheek and clickin’ his tongue against the roof of his mouth, “So, all that said, you gotta get dressed dollface, breakfast is waiting.”

“Okay, okay, one more kiss?” Your eyes implore him, and who the hell is he to deny you? He leans in and kisses you softly on the mouth, but you shake your head, smiling, “No, that didn’t count.”

“Okay, there.” Pale gives you another one, tilting your face up to meet his better, for his tongue to tease right at the edge of your lower lip.

“No, that one didn’t either.” Whispering, you shake your head again, rolling onto your back and bringing Pale with you.

“How about this one?” Pale asks before gently holding onto your jaw, letting his eyes close as your mouths part in unison, sighing against each other’s lips, letting a full week of nothing but quickies and busy fucking fade away, reveling in the closeness of being together at last.

“No.” You reply, your fingers threading through his hair, not wanting to give him up yet, “One more...”

Like that, you and Pale stay for quite a while, entwined in the feeling of one another. And if Pale decides to strip down and give you a couple orgasms before he takes you out, if that means you miss the breakfast reservation and grab something from the bodega instead, if you wind up covered in hickies for your shopping appointments, well, you certainly don’t give a shit -- just glad to be with your favorite man after some time apart, together at last.

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Tagging some Pale lovin' friends! @sacklerscumrag @artsymaddie @bitchydecisions @direnightshade @reyloaddict55 @sunflowersinthesnow @safarigirlsp @steeevienicks @rosi3ba3z @chapterhappygirl @schopenhauerdeathsquad @bxnnywriting @glassbxttless @angel-bxby3 @2000andwhat @raddo1975 @cornmousequeen @caillea @painttheskylineforme @holding-on-to-starwars @kylo-ren-is-alive @icarusinthesea @princessflip

[itstheimpossibledream]

Only A Play -Part 1

Word count:1297

Pairing:AU Henry & FemBlack! Reader

Warning: Angsty Drabble.smut to come (series ?)

Summary: AU Henry is rehearsing for a Broadway show but, but isn’t living up to expectations. It will be a smut series so just hold on. Request and advice always accepted. I literally haven’t thought of a name for the series yet so any suggestions are appreciated !😊

" I've never wanted anything this much before." you said looking down at your hand, feeling the pads of his fingers lightly draw your chin up until your eyes met his gaze.

" Then come with me." he bellows, blue eyes forcing their way into your memory forever.

"HOLD!" you hear from the back of the room as the lights draw up. Henry takes a step back from you,dropping his acting face and allowing a shy smile to seep across his features.The director made his way to the front of the rehearsal room, sighed to himself and dismissed everyone. " Great work today guys, thank you for your patience. Really need you to nail those beats down Henry. Important stuff.... Important stuff." You could tell he was not pleased with this particular piece, having worked with him before you noticed a stark contrast from the man who was the life of the party when you had been an assisting lead in his breakthrough play just a year prior. It would be too much to say you had started a friendship but, a work-related understanding was absolutely within reason.Steve was a solid director, who tried to be as fun as he was professional. You quickly gathered your things, and headed to the door of the studio, to find some solace in the nasty habit of smoking, you knew you should quit. But it was just one of those things that you had started in college and the stress relief of anything else legal had never been quite the same. You exhaled in annoyance, annoyance with your performance, your day, the fact that it could be so blisteringly cold in New York on a February morning. But, enjoying the feeling of laying your head against the brick wall, it was sunday morning that was the quietest it got in manhattan. You find a twinge inside yourself finally able to muster up the courage to walk home but you turn your head when you hear your name.

"Yeah- Hi, look I'm sorry for all of this my agent thought I would be a good fit for the play and I fell in love with the piece but, I really just can't seem to get anything right for him huh?" Henry awkwardly half smiled at you shifting his weight from one foot to another, digging a hole with the toe of his shoe into the snow. He had an effortless way of looking like he just left the gym.He must go regularly, you couldn’t put a finger on why that annoyed you but it did, it made you even more frustrated that this nervous,quirky hot guy routine was working.

"Well-" you began quickly inhaling a breath of cold air "you could start by being off-book. And not movie off book, like actually off book. He knows you don't know the show." you say moving your eyes up from his shoes to read his expression. You took a long drag of your cigarette,he didn't move. He seemed somehow stuck by your words.It seemed,moving the snow with his foot was becoming more of a tick.Maybe the insecurity was more genuine than you were giving it credit for.

"You know, it must be so comfy knowing you can always secure a job because of your face." You said almost laughing and tilting your head in his direction.

"What's that supposed to mean?" he snorted, he was really working on that snow cavern now.

"That means we all know you booked this job, because for some reason horny housewives can't seem to stay away from you. You have to admit your name on a marquee is guaranteed ticket sales and the producers value that over actual art anyday." you say smugly.

"Is that what you really think of me?" he asked.

"That's what I know. " you responded not missing a beat or avoiding his eye contact for a second. " Do you know the actor you beat out for this role? He's a Tony award winner, a purely brilliant performer and on top of that he's gorgeous but you beat him out. Because he's black and in America a mediocre white guy wins everytime." you stepped closer into him and continued , wondering if you were digging into him too hard.But, finally being able to say the truth you had been feeling for so long was too cathartic. "See, what I think of you doesn't matter, because I'm going to be professional, and I'm going to do my job. And I'm going to fuck you onstage infront of thousands of people everynight and none will be the wiser but, I want you to know. I want you to know that your position has not been earned and everyone knows it." you say really laying into him " So, the least you could do is act as though you cared about the project and learn your lines. Some people don't have their own homes and multi-million dollar bank accounts to go home to, for some of us this is our lives." You finish stomping out your cigarette and turn on your heels to walk away.

"I'm not as bad as you think" he says, you spin back on your heels to face him.

" You are though.” you shrug “ See I do my research, I know about your weird,sordid history with the me too movement, with having to apologize to co-stars during a sex scene. Dude-you dated a college student and then broke up with her in front of the whole world! And if you really cared about this project you would have more of an understanding of the societial implications of being in an interracial relationship to begin with. The fact the the dramaturg sent us endless links and information and you obviously had the time to read none of it doesn't bode well for you as far as not being an ass hole."

"So you think I'm an ass hole?" he whispers, raising his eyebrows.

"I don't know what to think of you. I don't know what I should think of a man who admits in interviews that the best part of being an actor is the money. I mean god- do you even like it?" you scoff, knowing your face must be burning with rage at this point.

"Truthfully, no." he shrugs, the city falls exceedingly quiet as you meet his eyes and realize it must be the most honest thing he has said in a long while. Your eyes trailed back down to the hole at his feet, you chuckled to yourself. Of Course he didn't care about acting.

" I used to though-" he says,his deep baritone breaking the silence "Before I got the big jobs,that's when it was real for me. I think - I don't know the - the money and the fame, and the parties" he laughed to himself " It started becoming about more than just the art. Started becoming about being popular, being liked, gaining fans all the shit that makes you an ass hole I guess. " a smirk begins to play at the corner of his lips.

You pull your jacket sleeves further down over your hands,and see him adjust his hat to protect from the breeze. It was raw, it was honest, it was exactly what Stephen had been trying to pull out of him the entire time.

"Bring Kal." you said switching your weight to your back foot "Steve likes dogs." you shrug, stepping on your cigarette butt again before turning on your heels to leave.

You see him break into a large smile. It hadn't exactly been an ideal first two months, but with a dog in the mix at least rehearsals may be more fun.

[cto10121]

west side story (2021) review, the good, the bad, and the ugly. let’s go, daddy-o. spoilers, of course

the good:

dramatically, much more satisfying than the 1961 movie. the sharks and the jets were appropriately very rough. riff especially was terrific. miss the balletic elegance of the original bernardo (george chakiris) something awful, but the acting overall was much more improved.

the song order made musical and dramatic sense!!! thank goodness, that i was the most worried about. “i feel pretty” was in its original broadway placement, but it wasn’t too bad (could have done a better lead-in, though). i would have much preferred the film placement. i liked the conceit of the gun play in “cool,” but i still love the swing and robbins dance of the original, can’t be beat.

the lovers!!! their chemistry!!! much better than the ‘61 movie (the height difference helps a lot, muah).

“i have forgotten why i called you.” “let me stay here till you’ve remembered it.” be still, my shakespearean heart. points to the screenwriter

ansel engort as tony. it’s too bad he’s cancelled, because he was much better overall than beymer. i actually found him a better actor than rachel zegler, though not a better singer. they gave him a backstory about how he almost killed a PR, landed him in jail, and that’s how he turned his back on that street life. great. it was affecting. it was “whoop, tripped on your dick”-able. actually first time i noticed engort was fuckable. he was very meh in “the fault of our stars.”

rachel zegler as maria. i should have known they would have not have fucked around with casting maria, because the role is not fuck-aroundable. they pulled through this time. she did lovely vocally, and her acting was solid. still not as beautifully as the maria from the houston grand opera production i saw (teared up her “somewhere,” it was so beautiful), but she looked the part and she was just lovely overall.

did i forget to mention riff? freakin’ RIFF. terrific. had good chemistry with tony too (though with pure shipping fodder for the tumblr crowd. i know you lot well by now, don’t lie).

they actually got a vocal coach for the puerto rican accent! kind of extra, but nice. that said, you can tell the original actors’ spanish is different from the borriqueño accent, and it was kind of put on.

at the end they bore a dead tony away in the exact same way they bore mercutio and tybalt off in french retj. no, seriously! i know i’m a dumb fangirl about retj, but it did make me wonder…

i liked rita moreno’s character background as the widow of doc. nice touch with the white/hispanic interracial romance parallel

lt. schrank and krupke were well-played. i was actually impressed by schrank in the scene when he’s interrogating maria and anita on chino and shows that he knows spanish. it was good writing.

the fighting really was visceral. i was genuinely like “holy shit” the whole time i was watching. ditto for the rape scene. when i first watched the ‘61 version, i actually didn’t caught on that it was supposed to be an attempted rape scene (i was a kid tho) so anita getting angry and lying that maria was dead made little sense. here it did, so props

the tonight quartet was done much better than in the ‘61 version. could have done without the fade out on anita, though.

the bad:

the dialogue for the meeting scene, the balcony scene (somewhat) and the “one hand, one heart” scene was…not great. actually inferior to the movie/stage dialogue. movie just didn’t romance good overall. actors had to do a lot of work pulling it off

maria laughing at tony trying to speak spanish to her (“yo quiero estar contigo para siempre”). it was fine on literally the first try, it was cute!!! i was personally beaming. his scene with valentina/rita moreno teaching him spanish was funny. it felt mean

actually the dialogue in general. some of it was strong and impactful, but that first scene before the jets song ran way too long. there was clearly some meta attempts to justify the existence of a white ethnic gang

and oh, that borrinqueño song the sharks sang when they left was just awful. scrub it off my memory, please.

the music and arrangements were not…bad, per se. it’s just…the orchestra was bigger in both the ‘61 and the leonard bernstein version with kiri te kanawa and josé carreras. i could have sworn gustavo dudamel had a bigger orchestra than this

some of the presentation of the songs was uneven. the jet song was weak, “america” started weak and ended strong. you get the idea

i feel ariana debose didn’t do as great as anita as rita moreno (don’t know about chita rivera, never saw her act it). it may be the writing, though. anita is supposed to be a character eager to be american, speaking mostly english, losing her accent, etc. bernardo and the sharks is supposed to be ones who are like fuck the whites!!! it doesn’t really come across like that, though, which leads me to:

the america lyrics. they kept the boy-girl version, great! they replaced anita’s beginning (“puerto rico / my heart’s devotion / let it sink back in the ocean” or even “puerto rico / you ugly island / island of tropic diseases”) for “puerto rico / you lovely island” which is supposed to be one of the shark girls’ intro!!! and then of course the censoring of “and the bullets flying” to “and the people trying” (and not sung by anita). it makes no sense for anita to start singing about how great puerto rico is and then how she prefers to be in america (???). made no sense whatsoever

spielberg must have been allergic to fantasy sequences, because he just…didn’t do them. even though they are written in the show. the transition from maria twirling to the dance of the gym was cut—i know it looked weird in the ‘61 movie, but it was the sixties! editing and special effects were not that great. now we do know how to edit better, why not use it? also, the maria cha-cha/meeting scene should definitely had been a fantasy sequence. the meeting behind the bleachers thing was just cringe. and again the dialogue (“you don’t like to dance?” “i don’t. i do. i like to dance now.” just say “i do now” dude. compress it!!).

also, (i will die on this hill): “gee officer krupke” should have 100% been a fantasy sequence and it is just. never been done as one. it’s perfectly fine and witty on stage, but on film you’re just seeing a bunch of street-hardened kids doing costume theater…yeah, it’s just awkward. it didn’t help matters that it was not as expressive or as fun or even as impactful as the ‘61 version. also the ‘61 version had a better lead-in

did not appreciate the loss of the robbins choreography, especially in the rumble and prologue. just because idiots call it too gay for tough gangsters doesn’t mean it wasn’t the best. goddamn. thing. in the original ‘61 version they looked like panthers on the prowl, sinuous and deadly.

did not like how the mambo dance was interrupted by plot. especially since it began so well with the blues and the tension of the promenade!!! the mambo also was not a true mambo or even fully latin—it’s a hybridized dance with latin and jazz elements. so anita calling for it was stupid and cringe (both sides originally called for a dance-off), and them not showcasing the dancing skills of the jets (really missed russ tamblyn’s tumbling!!! it was so badass).

the jets girls being non-entities for most of the movie until anita’s rape scene when they almost randomly try to help her just after racially abusing her. because we can’t let the audience think that the movie thinks rape isn’t wrong!!! what would the twitter discourse say???? ay ay ay

the ugly:

the swaths of spanish, mostly untranslated, without subtitles. -.- i’m a bilingual latina, watched it with my first generation colombian dad who saw the ‘61 version in the theaters and it threw us off. imagine how the monolinguals must feel—hell, just the people who don’t speak spanish!!! west side story is not a “puerto rican/hispanic” thing, it’s a worldwide phenomenon. it’s limiting and exclusive when it shouldn’t be. no mames

GIVING “SOMEWHERE” TO RITA MORENO

NO, SERIOUSLY, “SOMEWHERE” SUNG BY RITA FREAKIN’ MORENO. i was so pissed, and i mean glaring-at-the-screen pissed. wtf, movie???? what the fuck was wrong with the duet of the ‘61? with even the disembodied voice of the broadway musical? what did “somewhere” do that made you hate it so much????? and no, rita moreno did not do a good job singing it she was weak asf. shit, i thought it was a trailer thing. did not expect to be blindsided by this shit. crass move

also cutting the somewhere reprise at the ending scene for “one hand, one heart.” no. just no.

also rita moreno was overall weak in this. it’s true. sorry not sorry. she could have made a good cameo, but they just stuck her where she didn’t need to be, including the even lamer ending of leading chino to the police. the worst was during “something’s coming” with tony singing directly at her. cringe

“something’s coming” was overall botched. the whole tony and riff dialogue was good, if overly long, but riff didn’t even persuade tony to come to the dance!!! so tony singing about “something’s coming” came out of nowhere—what is he looking forward to tonight? and then he just appears at the dance. i’m guessing they tried to make the song about him slowly coming around to the idea??? didn’t work imo

the jets were never the heroes of west side story. they were consistently shown as the aggressors or at least the most racist most of the time in the stage and in the movie. but this movie tips them almost into villain territory while the sharks have a (totally unbelievable) scene trying persuading chino not to kill tony. the original movie struck a better balance, though mostly its point was not about which side is more racist, it was about the dangers of tribal mentality and us vs. them racism. the jets are also abused by racial slurs by lt. schrank and krupke in the original ‘61—this movie only keeps the “polack” comment by bernardo. there are no more white ethnic gangs, though, so the racism towards them wouldn’t ring true for today’s audiences. but let’s face it, west side story is a period piece, and it’s still set in the ‘50s here.

tony and maria in the subway arguing about which side is more racist (?) and trying to justify their own people. no. they are not supposed to care about all of that. especially this tony, who is protective of and grateful to valentina and stood up for her against riff. he even learns spanish for her!!! it rang untrue. also maria felt more resistant somehow to tony

the thematic shift altogether. the original musical and movie had a simplistic and cheesy “love not hate” theme, but y’know, can’t argue with that. here it honestly felt as if the movie accepted the racism (?) as de facto and tony and maria as mere casualties of a long war. also there’s valentina’s “life is more important than love” warning to tony (??) which is much more riddling. first of all, you can’t really say the lovers gave their lives for love as r&j did. tony’s death was very much feud-related, just precipitated by the thought of maria dying. maria didn’t die at all. the warning doesn’t apply here. i guess it might have just been an attempt on valentina’s part to keep tony from assisted suicide and no real thematic meta statement, but still. also, this is a movie where two gangs actively try to kill life and hold no love for each other. i think we all know what is the bigger problem here.

the close ups. few and far-between for the most part, but some felt claustrophobic, not intimate, and in some cases just lazy. spielsburg just plopped the camera down in front of maria and anita during “a boy like that” and had them sing-talk to each other. i call it the les misérables school of the most literal talk-singing ever.

tony fighting back and beating up bernardo before realizing what he is doing and riff taking over. no. for one thing, it made the point where tony finally snaps and kills bernardo far less meaningful. we know tony has a rough past and is capable of defending himself—he is just smart (and de facto traumatized) in turning away from that life. it would have been far better to have made riff snap from seeing tony being beat up and fight bernardo with a weapon.

in sum: the movie did work best as a movie, which is more than i can say for other musical movies minus chicago. spielberg was helped by the fact that wss was dramatic and heavy already thanks to its r&j roots, but some of his adaptational decisions were questionable. and while competitive with the ‘61 movie in many ways, i don’t think it was artistically better than even the bernstein operatic version. musically and vocally it was solid, but the truncated jerome robbins was keenly felt. you could feel his ghost bristling at parts—the dancers did well enough, but that obsessive, gravity-defying perfectionism and keen eye for detail…nah. done on purpose, i know, but it burns me, because if there is one thing the americans have managed to retain, it’s good dancing and choreography. they brought in gustavo dudamel but did not give him a big orchestra; the weakest arrangements were for the swing/jazz pieces. understandable, but it makes my heart burn. that’s my fannish heart talking—but honestly, yeah. in many ways this is an improvement.

[ectonurites]

for the character headcannons ask game, jason and cass?

ALRIGHT ALRIGHT im putting this one under a cut because it got SUPER long bc i cant shut up ever

lets start w jason

A (realistic headcanon): 

ok using the ‘realistic’ category here loosely but GOD i love the idea of Damian & Jason having interacted while Jason was staying with the League before getting dunked in the Lazarus Pit. like. this obviously would need to be set more in preboot and following the Lost Days & Batman Annual 25 version of Jason’s resurrection, but god the idea of it just makes me scream in a good way. Like... these are things Jason likely doesn’t remember very clearly once he’s brought back to life more fully by the pit because he was uh pretty catatonic, but Damian being a little kid and knowing about the boy that his mother keeps around the base, that she’s trying to help bring back to health. Damian not even knowing that’s his big brother, just that he’s a presence that shares his mother’s attention. Jason again being unresponsive but like, ok god you know that part of lost days where Talia shows the others observing him that he only fights back at those he perceives as genuine threats trying to hurt him, 

Because Jason can perceive that she’s safe, she’s not actually trying to hurt him, he trusts her because she saved him? thinking about lil child Damian who is ya know already being trained in fighting stuff and like the idea of him trying to provoke Jason just to see what happens but Jason not fighting back because on some level be it his connection to Talia or even little baby Damian visually reminding him of Bruce, he knows that Damian is safe too 🥺 

and then when Jason and Damian meet again in Gotham as Red Hood & Robin respectively, Jason not really remembering because there was so much going on back then for him, but Damian realizing that oh... that was Him

B (hilarious): 

alright so if we are looking at comics currently, in modern stuff jason is what, like 22? hes old enough to drink in the US but still definitely early 20s so around my around my age, thats what im using as a basis here. if we adjust timeline and still consider his death having happened when he was 15, that puts it around 2013. and then coming back to like interacting with people about three years later if we still kinda base things off of the preboot timeframe (since we never got a super solid retelling of the timeline of death -> resurrection -> training -> tries to get revenge aside from knowing he went to the all-caste instead of the lost days version of the story) making him reenter the regular world and stuff around age 18 in 2016. meaning a solid three years of pop culture that he was entirely missing, and like im sorry but he really doesn’t strike me as the type to bother looking into what he missed, he’s kinda busy focusing on other stuff. lets take a quick look at some major things from those years. 2013 gave us ‘what does the fox say’ and ‘the harlem shake’ . 2014 had that time U2 just put a fuckin album on everyone’s phones, The Fault In Our Stars movie came out. 2015 introduced the phrase ‘Netflix and Chill’ and the whole blue & black vs gold & white dress debate happened. imagine any of the other batkids (or even arguably roy during rhato stuff) bringing these things up and jason’s ensuing confusion. thank you for your time

C (heart-crushing): 

so. there are two specific instances from rebirth era Jason i want to bring up here and much like a lot of these it’s less a headcanon and more of an inference based on observations, but i wanna take a sec to discuss Jason’s relationship with other people’s death. early in rebirth, Tim ‘dies’ from that whole thing in detective comics. he didn’t actually die, we as readers know, but in-universe they all very much so thought he was dead. frustratingly a lot of the batfam wasn’t really shown mourning him aside from in the Detective Comics Rebirth title itself (which just. when a major character dies even if its temporary- that should have a ripple effect) BUT an exception to that is in RHATO 2016, where we get this offhanded comment in Jason’s internal monologuing

similarly later when Roy, who like, had an incredibly close relationship w Jason that had just gotten mended before Heroes in Crisis, gets fuckin murdered in that whole thing... Jason doesn’t go to his funeral either. He leaves a dramatic voice mail and then visits the grave on his own later, choosing to instead keep working on the mission they’d started rather than going and taking the time to mourn properly.

Jason’s relationship with death is incredibly complicated, obviously. He has died, he has come back, and he now is willing to cross the line most other bats won’t and will kill people when he deems it necessary. I think thats something important though- he doesn’t just like... go around killing for fun (usually, some writers preboot made him a little murder happy but even then usually this still was vaguely followed) he kills people he thinks deserved it. Like, even looking back at the mess of Morrison’s Jason during Batman & Robin 2009, Jason was still trying to bring a sense of justice with who he was killing (”punishment that fits the crime”), it wasn’t killing for the sake of killing. He sees things in this kind of almost black and white ‘people who deserve it’ and ‘people who don’t’ way, and he has no problem dealing with death when it’s with the people he thinks deserve it. 

but when someone who doesn’t in his mind ‘deserve it’ gets killed? i think he just goes into total avoidance mode. throws himself into other things he’s doing, tries not to dwell on it too much no matter how much he still thinks about it (this is especially evident in him consistently telling people “i’m fine!” after what happened to Roy, despite bringing Roy up literally like every few issues for a WHILE after he died and very clearly still struggling with it, Artemis is the only one who gets through to him on it a little bit) 

but yeah, I just think that from Jason’s relatively unique situation of having been murdered, he knows what it’s like and he is perfectly fine wishing that on people he thinks are bad and deserve it, but it crushes him to imagine the people he loves and cares about having to experience something as painful as what he went through. not to mention the whole “I came back, why do I get a second chance at all this when they, who are a much better person than I am, probably won’t” mindset we get some implications of him having 

D (canon is a coward and won’t) 

hello DC i am once again insisting a batfam member is bisexual

CASS TIME

A (realistic headcanon): 

ok so we know cass likes ballet. thats canon. however i think we also should in general explore cass experiencing other types of dance/performance as well, be it herself as a performer or even just watching. like... god imagine her & like my brain just automatically for group activities puts her with tim steph and duke but also for this in particular I feel would be a Jason embraced activity, but like them going to see a broadway show or some other professional theatre or something, and her just being enthralled by the reading of body language of the performers! like again by any point in current stuff cass does have like, the ability to speak fine (reading still hard tho) but even so I think like. okay im a theatre kid if that’s not obvious from the Everything About Me but one thing I always do after seeing a show is ya know spend dinner afterwards discussing it with whoever i saw it with.

I just think that like, bringing those people i just mentioned to the table to discuss seeing a show after would be so FASCINATING because cass would bring this whole perspective of critiquing their acting on a whole different level- not based on how well they delivered lines out loud, but by what their body language was saying as they moved on stage. like im very amused by the idea of cass getting a totally different picture in her mind about what a character’s motivations were because she was paying way more attention to what their physicality was saying vs the words that were written and how they were delivered. i think the debates her and the others would have would be EPIC there. jason defending the text as it was written adamantly and cass being like ‘ok yeah sure but thats not what they did’

B (hilarious): 

cass having no concept of money because why would she bother? is SO funny to me. like it’s not that she couldn’t be reasonable if she wanted to, but like, she knows that the Waynes are well off so it’s not something she actually needs to be concerned about, so she just goes hog wild. takes steph out to fancy dinners and makes steph order for them since cass ya know doesn’t really read the menus, and steph’s like ‘jesus christ this costs-” “don’t worry about it” “but cass-” and she just holds up one of bruce’s credit cards and steph’s still like “but you don’t even know the range-” “it is fine”

bruce does not have the heart to tell her to stop

C (heart-crushing): 

i mean this is pretty much canon but especially now after death metal where she’s remembering, not just being told by a guy using weird alternate timeline technology, that she used to be an adopted member of the Wayne family... like that hurts so bad. To look at these people who have ya know been kind to her, Bruce has still been a father-like figure to her (i mean literally from the moment they met in New 52 canon during the flashback in Batman & Robin Eternal, where he’s telling her that she’s not a monster just because of what people forced her to do.... that she’s a hero... that hug.... dad behavior), and they do to some extent treat her as family... But to then really know, to feel and remember that she was actually adopted! She was a part of their family. To look at how she’s been calling herself Orphan while working with them this whole time... that’s so heartbreaking! I have cried about this idea so much! I want so badly a conversation between her and Bruce now where he offers to officially adopt her again, I need it so bad and if it doesn’t happen at some point in the next year or two I will be so distraught.

D (canon is a coward and won’t) 

i want an in-depth exploration of cass’ relationship to her own gender. being raised without language and you know with so much of her life being independent (remember: CASS RAN AWAY AROUND THE WORLD WITHOUT REALLY KNOWING ANY SPOKEN LANGUAGE) and outside of an organized society impressing too much of gender expectations on her, i feel like the way she experiences it would be very unique! like sure she’s so far been fine with being assigned ‘girl’ (ya know that comes with batgirl, and how people just automatically treated her based on how she looks) but in terms of gender expression and like her actual relationship with ‘traditional femininity’ etc like... because of how she was raised I just think she’d have a really different perspective on it that could be cool to explore, and I think she’d fall outside of the binary after she really thinks about how she identifies.

tldr on that: she/they nb cass is what i’m getting at here

[let-it-raines]

CS Fic Rec Monday

I hope you’re all staying safe and inside as much as physically possible! I said I was going to do this weeks ago, but I finally remembered to queue it all up! Here are some dang good multi-chapter fics you can curl up with! You’ve probably already read them if you’ve been around for awhile, but rereading is fun, too! Plus, I know these writers would get excited to see a new comment or two 😘 

-/-

As Real As You Want it To Be by @ive-always-been-a-pirate​: Teaching at the same school as Killian Jones was both infuriating and distracting, but when he throws Emma under the bus for the final time, she devises a plan to get back at him. After all, nobody likes to go to a wedding alone. Time for some CS AU fake dating.

Warm Nights and Firelight by @oubliette14​: When in the wake of a messy breakup Emma makes the impulsive decision to return home to her parent's ranch in the Rockies, she certainly doesn't expect to find a strange Irish guy living in what was once her apartment over the garage, and she definitely doesn't imagine that the home she couldn't wait to be rid of five long years ago would be the very place her heart begins to heal.

If Looks Could Kill by @wellhellotragic​: Emma Swan is a dedicated FBI agent getting over a bad breakup. When she and her partner, Ruby Lucas, are forced to go undercover as contestants on a reality show, Emma is forced to try and win the affections of Killian Jones, a man she despises.Killian Jones is a lost boy. Having recently been nicknamed the ‘Bad Boy of Boston,’ he’s been living up to his moniker using women and rum to avoid dealing with his dark past. When he’s forced to take the lead in a reality show, he encounters a gorgeous blonde who turns his world upside down. Miss Congeniality meets The Bachelor.

The Reason by @xemmaloveskillianx​: The three of them share a laugh before they all look to Emma. She has yet to comment on the new addition because she isn’t sure what to say. She usually doesn’t like change, they have a good thing going there, just the four of them. Plus, they all know him and she doesn’t, but she trusts their judgement, and she’s sure any brother of Liam can’t be all that bad.So, with a shrug and a smile she says, “Welcome to Storybrooke, Killian Jones.

The Wife by @ineffablecolors​: No one knows all that Emma has been through and certainly no one knows all that Killian has been through and being husband and wife doesn’t make them any less unknown to each other. And really, how can you help someone heal when you don’t even know how hurt they are?

Beauty in the Aftermath by @high-seas-swan​: Confronted with the sudden appearance of her birth parents, Emma, in a moment of panic, flees. She flees the diner, Storybrooke, the country. She finds herself a day later in the Dublin, Ireland Airport terminal wondering what the hell she has gotten herself into. With some fear, a little determination and a considerable amount of faking it along the way, she sets off on a trip she never planned on taking but needed more than she ever knew. She finds herself, she finds a Brit adrift on his own journey and finds out what home really means.

Playing the Part by @shireness-says​: As a stage manager who's clawed her way up from the bottom, Emma Swan can handle just about anything thrown her way. But does that include handsome lead actor Killian Jones? A CS Broadway AU.

Love, Kindness, and Other Useless Things by @joneskillian​: CS AU, set in 1815. Lord Killian Jones is haunted by the demons of his past which makes him nowhere near the man he once was, so he can't be the father he wants to be. And above all, he believes he is undeserving of love. Perhaps with Emma that is all about to change. But falling in love is never easy, that's just how it is.

Something Like You Love Me by @bemusedbicycle​: Emma decides the best way to get Mary Margaret off her back about Walsh is to say she already has a boyfriend. Except she doesn’t. That’s where Killian comes in. Fake!Engagement fic.

a one time thing (and other untruths) by @weezlywrites​: "She supposes the reason she tells him is the same reason she kept his phone number after all those weeks." Pregnancy has a way of throwing a wrench in one's plans.

Alone, until I get Home by @peglegsjones​: In Boston, Henry Swan's six-year-old brother Ian finds a book titled "Once Upon a Time" hidden beneath the seat in their mom's old yellow bug. As soon as Henry touches it, he remembers.Season 3 Canon Divergence-Emma finds out she's pregnant a few weeks after she and Henry leave Storybrooke with new memories and new lives. Nearly seven years later, another Dark Curse puts her family in danger, and Emma must return to Storybrooke to help them.Who's powerful enough to cast the Dark Curse? And how the hell is she going to tell Hook they have a son together?

Knock, Knock by @charmingturkeysandwich​: Emma Swan has made the best of her crappy apartment ever since she became best friends with her neighbor, Ruby. But when Ruby moves out and a loud Brit takes her place, the thin walls and lack of space are suddenly not so endearing. After a particularly stressful day, Emma decides to confront the nightmare next door, and entirely against her better judgment, she might just be making a friend.

These Nights Aren’t Made For Thinking by @nowforruin​: AU. Emma Swan came to Portland, ME to start over. She's got a job she loves, but when a particular case gets under her skin, she finds herself visiting the Jolly Roger and its curious bartender, Mr. Killian Jones, more often than she thinks is wise. But some nights aren't made for thinking. Captain Swan.

On the Two by @lifeinahole27​: He’s one bad trip from ending up in AA, and she’s one performance away from a solid job and moving closer to home. Their paths were unlikely to cross until Camp Hope brought them together. How and why they meet and intertwine is against the odds, and definitely against the rules, but will that really stand in their way? A Dirty Dancing inspired modern au.

Separate Lives by @lenfaz​: Set after 3x20 "Kansas". After saving the town one more time, Emma decided to return to New York, leaving her past behind. Three years later, she realizes that might be not have been the best decision.

Natural Opposite by @searchingwardrobes​: Dance is more than Emma Swan’s career; it’s practically saved her life on more than one occasion. But when it comes to reality TV shows, she’s always danced in the shadows of her twin brother David and her sister Elsa. Her first season as a pro on Dancing With the Stars was a disaster, and she enters her second season determined to prove herself. All she needs is a good partner. Hollywood bad boy and ladies’ man Killian Jones isn’t what she had in mind.

Walking in a Straight Line by @msgenevievee: It’s one of the oldest stories in the book. Two old friends have a few too many drinks, two old friends share a kiss. Happens all the time, right? But what happens when only one of them actually remembers it?

Out of the Frying Pan by @welllpthisishappening​: Emma Swan is only doing this for one reason, well, make that two. To get her show's numbers back up and, maybe, impress her son. She doesn't like admitting to that second one though.Killian Jones is doing this for absolutely, positively, just one reason. To expand his restaurant. And maybe get Regina off his back. So that's kind of two reasons.Neither one of them is doing a year-long Food Network all-star competition because they're celebrity chefs and there's not really any other choice. Of course not. And neither one of them is enjoying it because they maybe, kind of, sort of enjoy each other. That would be insane.

A Cold Awakening by @swanderful1​: Modern crime AU. Twenty years have gone by since Storybrooke was shaken to the core by a gruesome crime that went unsolved. Sheriff David Nolan and his partner, daughter Emma are forced to revisit the crime. At the same time, Killian Jones and his older brother Liam have been drawn back to the town they had longed to never see again, struggling to find their own answers. As taunting notes and clues show up they are taken on a journey to finally bring justice for the Jones family. And Emma Nolan finds herself caught in a situation more dangerous than she could have ever imagined.

Beyond the Horizon by @alexandralyman​: AU: When Princess Emma's ship is captured by the Jolly Roger and Captain Killian Jones, she offers herself as a hostage for ransom if he will let the ship and the other passengers go. With Emma, Killian remembers the honour he once held dear, and Emma catches glimpses of the gentleman Killian had been. Against all odds, the pirate and the princess begin to fall for each other.

[nerianasims]

Billboard #1s 1977

Under the cut.

Marilyn McCoo & Billy Davis, Jr. – “You Don’t Have To Be A Star (To Be In My Show)” -- January 8, 1977

They will be happy with each other as they are, not needing a "star." It sounds literal, like they think most people only want to have relationships with celebrities. It's got some bounce and a beat, but it's very light and not poetic at all. Meh.

Leo Sayer – “You Make Me Feel Like Dancing” -- January 15, 1977

Shouty falsetto. It might be disco if it were faster. I am not listening to this whole thing, because it will give me a headache.

Stevie Wonder – “I Wish” -- January 22, 1977

One of the greatest musical intros. It's a funk song about nostalgia, wishing for childhood again, and I normally hate that. But the music is amazing.

Rose Royce – “Car Wash” -- January 29, 1977

This was an intro song for a movie of the same name. I had no idea. I just thought someone decided to sing about working at a car wash randomly. The song is a little bit Motown, a little bit disco. It's fun.

Mary MacGregor – “Torn Between Two Lovers” -- February 5, 1977

It's slow, it's soppy, and it's about how she's cheating on "you" with someone else. She truly loves you, but she's not gonna stop seeing the other guy, whom she loves too. It sounds like she wants to try this whole poly thing she's heard about. But is the guy she's singing to gonna be okay with that? Probably not. Most people aren't. Maybe though. I don't care. For being about a subject that should be heartrending, this song sure is boring.

Manfred Mann’s Earth Band – “Blinded By The Light” -- February 19, 1977

This version made it to #1. Bruce Springsteen's original didn't even make it to the charts. This version is really bad -- it sounds like a recitation surrounded by goop, not a song. Bruce Springsteen's version is one of my favorite songs. I am going to sulk now.

Eagles – “New Kid In Town” -- February 26, 1977

Huh, an Eagles hit I've never heard before. This is about fame, how everyone loves you at first, then forgets you when the next big thing comes along. They try to shoehorn some stuff about romance in -- "Will she still love you when you're not around?" -- but it doesn't really flow. Also the song sounds like it should be playing in the background of a cabana. Fittingly for a song worried people will forget them, I have already forgotten this song.

Barbra Streisand – “Love Theme From A Star Is Born (Evergreen)” -- March 5, 1977

I listened to this song for 30 seconds. No more. I cannot stand Barbra Streisand. I don't think I'd like this song anyway, as it's glop, but maybe a different singer could have made it tolerable.

Daryl Hall & John Oates – “Rich Girl” -- March 26, 1977

Rich girls get picked on while rich boys are the ones who usually get away with everything. This song was actually originally about a rich guy, too. It would have been better. It's still good musically, but it misses the mark. Not that rich girls don't also get away with plenty, but compare and contrast what happened to Paris Hilton for her venial sins, versus the entire existence of Donald Trump.

ABBA – “Dancing Queen” -- April 9, 1977

ABBA was a good group. They were hated on, and now they're more likely to be exalted. They didn't deserve the hate (save it for the Bee Gees), but they're not the second coming or anything either. They were just a good, fun group. This song can be danced to, but it's a song more about dance than a dancing song. It's a rare song observing a young woman dancing while identifying with her, rather than lusting after her. "You can dance/ You can jive/ Having the time of your life." It's good.

David Soul – “Don’t Give Up On Us” -- April 16, 1977

The narrator did something really bad last night. Cheating? Worse? Now he's telling his lover not to "give up on us." As soft as the song is, "tell" is the word, not "ask." And he doesn't apologize once. Also, David Soul was a professional actor, but there's no worry in his voice; he's nothing but smooth and assured here. Blech.

Thelma Houston – “Don’t Leave Me This Way” -- April 23, 1977

It's disco with a large dose of Motown, or Motown with a large dose of disco. Either way, it works. Everything lines up with precision, and then Thelma Houston comes in over all of it with huge emotion. The contrast is sort of fascinating. Oh, and her huge emotion is that she wants sex. "Then come on, satisfy the need in me/ 'Cause only your good loving can set me free." She's not begging, but she's not exactly commanding either. It's really good.

Glen Campbell – “Southern Nights” -- April 30, 1977

It's Kidz Bop honky tonk. That's probably not fair; Glen Campbell grew up in a family of poor sharecroppers in Arkansas. But it's what I hear. It's happy clappy, and scrubbed clean of anything real.

Eagles – “Hotel California” -- May 7, 1977

Whatever you think this song is about, it's not about that. The Eagles wrote it with a mish-mash of stuff in mind, but mostly trying to be ambiguous. What that means is that whatever you think this song is about, it is about that. It's a choose your own adventure psychological horror song. I love it. It makes me happy in that way that good poetry and good music do -- and this is both.

Leo Sayer – “When I Need You” -- May 14, 1977

This song is cheese. Absolute, unadulterated cheese. But it's not bad cheese. It's a good solid cheddar. It's slow but not too slow, soft but not too soft, and it manages some interesting percussion. And Sayer sings like he means it. It's about missing his lover while he's on the road, and he imagines she's with him to get by. "When I need you/ I just close my eyes and I'm with you." It sounds kind of like a Broadway ballad. It's enjoyable.

Stevie Wonder – “Sir Duke” -- May 21, 1977

A song about Duke Ellington, which is a subject I approve of. Stevie Wonder also lists a few more legends, including one of my favorites: "And with a voice like Ella's ringing out/ There's no way the band can lose." It's a love song to music itself. It's sort of big band, sort of funk, and sort of Motown, and it works. The lyrics do get too repetitive for me near the end, though.

KC & The Sunshine Band – “I’m Your Boogie Man” -- June 11, 1977

It's a wordplay on the "bogie man" monster. But the boogie man wants to show up and give you whatever you want whenever you want however you want. Sexually. The song actually has more lyrics than most KC & The Sunshine Band songs, but it's still a song to dance to. Not to have sex to. But for dancing? Yep, it's good.

Fleetwood Mac – “Dreams” -- June 18, 1977

YAY! Okay so I have no interest in Fleetwood Mac without Lindsay Buckingham and Stevie Nicks. But when they joined in 1975, Fleetwood Mac became truly great. And this song is from Rumours, which is their best album (forged out of a hell of a lot of intragroup pain), and written and sung by Stevie Nicks, who was their best artist. My parents played this record and their previous self-titled one all the time. I didn't fully understand the songs when I was a kid, but I loved them. As I grew old enough to understand them, I loved them more. And now I love them more than that. I can't analyze this song. I love it too much.

Marvin Gaye – “Got To Give It Up (Part 1)” -- June 25, 1977

At first, he was uncomfortable at parties and didn't want to dance. But then he loosened up enough to dance, pretty obviously as a way to pick up chicks. There's the horrible line "Let me step into your erotic zone." The music is experimental. Marvin Gaye's falsetto is fine, but it's still a falsetto the whole damn song. And there are people making party noises in the background the whole time. I find this song painful.

Bill Conti – “Gonna Fly Now (Theme From Rocky) -- July 2, 1977

You know this instrumental, you've heard it tons. It's a good movie theme -- I think. It's hard to say, when it's something that's been so often present in so many different contexts in my life.

Alan O’Day – “Undercover Angel” -- July 9, 1977

The undercover angel is a make believe woman from a sex dream. At the end of the song, he's telling "you" that you remind him of the undercover angel, so you must be meant to be with him. It's an extended "I've seen you in my dreams" pickup line. It's so dumb.

Shaun Cassidy – “Da Doo Ron Ron” -- July 16, 1977

This is an excruciatingly boring cover of The Crystals' classic 60s girl group song.

Barry Manilow – “Looks Like We Made It” -- July 23, 1977

He's singing to an ex. They both "made it" because they found other people. Until "Looks like we made it/ Or I thought so till today/ Until you were there everywhere." If they get back together it's not going to be easy, because they'll be leaving relationships that seem happy. I don't think they'll get back together -- besides, she may not feel anything for him any more. It's a more complex song than it sounds. And Barry Manilow sure can sing. I wish he'd gone with the jazz songs he preferred, but then he wouldn't have been hugely successful. He decided to pull the rhinestone cowboy trick, and I can't blame him. He did make the soppy 70s charts more tolerable than they would have otherwise been.

Andy Gibb – “I Just Want To Be Your Everything” -- July 30, 1977

For instance, without Barry Manilow, Andy Gibb would probably have had more hits. Gibb's voice is thin. If you're going to sing a line like "Oh, if I, if I stay here without you darlin' I will die," you need some power and drama behind it. This guy sounds like he's trying to sell kitchen tile. It's a relatively fast song, but the beat is somehow irritating too. Blech.

The Emotions – “Best Of My Love” -- August 20, 1977

It starts with a blast of horns, and then a blast of singing. Then the chorus is quieter than the rest, which is weird to me. I can't put my finger on why this song bores me, but it does.

Meco – “Star Wars Theme/Cantina Band” -- October 1, 1977

A disco mashup of the Star Wars theme with the cantina band theme. That happened. I love John Williams' music and I think he deserves credit for at least half of Star Wars' success. But I think this remix sounds extremely dumb. Someone slowed down the cantina band theme a couple years ago and that sounds very noir and cool. This doesn't.

Debby Boone – “You Light Up My Life” -- October 15, 1977

The person who wrote this song was completely and absolutely terrible. But Debby Boone isn't. She's a Christian singer, but seems to be one of the nice ones, not the wingnut fundie ones. Anyway, she wasn't a Christian singer in 1977 (though she was Christian). And she had a good voice. But she sings this song painfully slowly. It sounds like she comes in after where she's supposed to come in and then draws out the notes longer than she's supposed to. I don't know if that's her or the song itself. I sped up the song to 1.25 and it's a little more palatable, but it's still bad. It's a trudge. I don't feel lit up after this.

The Bee Gees – “How Deep Is Your Love” -- December 24, 1977

It's not falsetto, though Barry Gibb does go uncomfortably high some. But it's still very bad. It's a string of bland cliches over bland music. And the weird 70s male romance song entitlement: "And it's me you need to show/ How deep is your love?" Shut up.

BEST OF 1977 -- "Dreams" by Fleetwood Mac  WORST OF 1977 -- "Star Wars Theme/Cantina Band" by Meco. People really would disco to anything, huh?

[maryjancwatson]

IC PORTION; BASICS —

CHARACTER NAME/ALIAS: Mary Jane Watson

FACECLAIM: Madelaine Petsch

AFFILIATIONS: At the moment, unaffiliated. 

AGE (physical age as well, if different): 24

SPECIES (human, metahuman, alien, etc): Human

IS YOUR CHARACTER’S IDENTITY SECRET OR PUBLIC? N/A

IF SECRET, OR YOUR CHARACTER IS A CIVILIAN, DO THEY HAVE A CIVILIAN OCCUPATION?: Mary Jane very recently snagged a job at the UN in Sokovia as their Goodwill Ambassador. Mary Jane is also working with a local charity, both in relief work and working to raise funds independently due to her following on social media platforms.

IF YOUR CHARACTER LIVES IN THE FORTRESS, WHAT ARE THEIR DUTIES? : Maybe one day she will return to being Tony Stark’s coffee bitch.

DESCRIBE SIX TRAITS (3 positive, 3 negative) YOUR CHARACTER HAS AND HOW THESE AFFECT THEM: + Passionate: Anyone that meets Mary Jane knows that she has passion, as it’s clear within the first five minutes of talking to her. She’s passionate about everything: coffee preferences, movies vs. books debates, and in particular, Broadway shows. It goes deeper than that, though, and that becomes clear in knowing her better. Mary Jane practically bleeds for things that she believes in. She gives 110% into everything she does, and it shows. + Adaptable: Mary Jane grew up in an ever-changing environment, and it turned her into a person that can roll with the punches. She’s able to adapt to situations quickly, and is able to think on her feet. She can stay relatively unphased with change and adapt accordingly. + Charismatic: Mary Jane is a people person. She spent so much of her childhood and adolescence moving around that she had to learn how to socialize quickly, and it made Mary Jane into a social butterfly. She knows how to talk to people, knows how to make small talk and easily does the back-and-forth with just about anyone. - Hot-headed: There is no way around it: Mary Jane Watson has a temper. She goes from 0 to 100 in the blink of an eye, and sometimes struggles coming back down to 0. It’s not easy to light the flame under her and set her alight, and it’s something she’s been working on since childhood. Even on the rare occasions where she does manage to keep a lid of the explosions, her facial expressions give it all away. - Commitment-phobic / flighty: Mary Jane doesn’t like to stick to one thing or one place for long, and sometimes has trouble sticking to things. While she gives 100% in passion, sometimes it’s a solid 60% in commitment. She dropped out of college, almost dropped out of high school a few times before that, and never signs more than a six months lease. Most of her romantic relationships have ended poorly because Mary Jane never knows what Mary Jane wants, and she starts to feel claustrophobic when things get tough. This is more on a personal level. Professionally, she sticks to her guns a little more. - Selfish: Mary Jane is always looking out for Mary Jane. She’s trying to do better, but her bottom instinct is always to do what’s best for herself. She’s scrappy, as one needs to be in the showbiz world, but it impacts her personal relationships as well.

POWERS AND/OR ABILITIES: Mary Jane is very human, and possesses no super-human abilities. However, she’s semi-famous with a solid social media following! (if only that were a super power) MJ is charismatic and highly organized, and has a leadership quality to her. She enjoys organization and administrative-type tasks, and is a go-getter to get shit done.

WEAKNESSES: Again, MJ is definitely human. I would say her strongest weaknesses are her fear of commitment and her tendencies to be selfish, as this only gets in her own way of what she wants. Mary Jane is also a chronic over-thinker, and can think herself into a box at times.

WHAT DREW YOU TO THIS CHARACTER? MJ is a spitfire and my spirit animal. She’s feisty and fiery and I love how she’s always unapologetically herself, even when it shoots her in the foot. She’s not the traditional-type character to bring to Sokovia considering she is very much a civilian, but I think her personality can definitely bring some fun.

IC PORTION; DETAILS —

WHAT BROUGHT YOUR CHARACTER TO SOKOVIA? It’s a little complicated. She applied for a job at the UN in Sokovia to be their Goodwill Ambassador, and somehow someway she’d gotten through the first several rounds of interviews. She had gotten a job with a charity working out of Sokovia for the moment as well, as a back-up just in case they went with someone else. But, surprisingly enough (or so it felt to her), she’d gotten the job. The charity work and the Goodwill Ambassador job went hand in hand, and MJ found that it was more joy-bringing than she’d thought it would be.

DID THEY SIGN THE ACCORDS? WHY OR WHY NOT? This isn’t exactly applicable, considering Mary Jane is most definitely a citizen, however she would certainly not have if she was on the other side. 

PROVIDE 3-5 HEADCANONS RELATED TO YOUR CHARACTER: MJ is a chain smoker. She’s tried to quit, though those have only ever been passive attempts at best. She does not do well when she’s off her nicotine. She’s also a fan of the other kind of mary jane, if you catch my vibe. MJ blogs, has a YouTube channel, and practically lives on TikTok. She’s verified on her social media platforms, and has a pretty big following. She still has fans from her Broadway runs and from her short-lived fame on Netflix, and so she does her best to stay relevant and keep them despite her current break from acting. The term ‘social media empire’ comes to mind, even if she feels weird about her claim to fame. MJ lives in high heels and generally dresses nicely. She has a very firm belief that first impressions matter most but all impressions matter. She always wants to look like hell on wheels, even if it’s impractical at times. She usually saves jeans and t-shirts for time at home only, and even then finds herself more comfortable in a dress. Despite having a party girl persona and having dropped out of college, Mary Jane is intelligent. She excelled in history and English courses in high school and in college alike, though her passion was in performing. She’s obsessed with trivia games and trivia-type TV shows. Wheel of Fortune is absolutely her favorite. She’s also super fond of reality TV, the more mind-numbing the better.

POTENTIAL CHARACTER ARCS: Maybe a potential Iron Spider or Spinneret arc? I love civilian!MJ, but I think this would be interesting. This would be a little complicated and would require a lot of thought and plotting, but maybe down the line! IS THERE A THEATRE/DANCE PROGRAM IN SOKOVIA? BECAUSE MJ WOULD BE SO DOWN TO RUN ONE. TEACH LITTLE KIDS BALLET AND SHIT. GIVE HER THAT. Nomad-y things. MJ obviously wouldn’t be affiliated with the rebels from the jump, considering her position in the UN. However, she may gravitate towards at least a sympathizer down the road, considering her connections with Tony.

CHARACTER BIO —

Mary Jane was the second born child to Madeline and Phillip Watson, the first being her older sister Gayle. Her father was a professor, though changed jobs often, resulting in multiple moves throughout Mary Jane’s childhood. Her father wanted to be a writer, not a professor, though his books never succeeded. This led to anger that was often taken out on his family, usually while drunk. Mary Jane was in middle school when her mother decided that enough was enough - her father had been turning on her mother for years, but he’d finally turned on one of the girls. The three left Phillip for good.

Unfortunately, the constant moving didn’t seem to stop. Mary Jane’s mother still moved them around often, usually to be near relatives. Her mother usually worked as a waitress or a bartender, relying on tips for income, which wasn’t always stable. Thankfully, her mother’s family was kind, and would help with the girls as much as they could. Her mother went back to school, deciding that she and her children deserved more. Mary Jane’s favorite relative to stay with was Aunt Anna, who lived in Queens.

The frequent moves caused Mary Jane to have a rather extroverted and fun-loving personality, a way to try to get noticed and make friends quickly. She knew she would never be in one place for long, so she tried to remain care-free. She never allowed herself to get too close, because she knew it would only be so long before she would be moving again. It was easier to have a lot of people she barely knew that were fun to be around than to have a few close friends she would have to say goodbye to.

She was fifteen when her mother got sick, and things went downhill quickly. Mary Jane watched her mother wither away before her eyes, and vowed in that moment to never take life for granted and grab it by the horns. After her mother passed, Mary Jane refused to move back in with her alcoholic father. Part of her blamed him for robbing Mary Jane and her sister of quality years with their mother, and memories of the abuse were still fresh. Instead, she went back to the home where she’d always been the happiest - Mary Jane moved in with her Aunt Anna in Queens.

Her life of the party attitude and fun/over-the-top personality quickly gained her friends in school, though Mary Jane still had trouble letting people in. she knew she wouldn’t be moving again this time, but it was somehow easier for her to have her walls up. People liked her, she liked them, and she told herself that was enough. It wasn’t, really, though it was all she knew how to do. She participated in the drama club and the choirs at school, as well as in community theatre.  This was where she made her true friends, where she made real connections that actually meant something. She had Broadway aspirations and spotlights in her eyes, and worked hard to perfect her craft. However, later in high school she found she had to put some productions on the back burner to get a job to help support the household she was living in. She mostly did waitressing jobs, though found a few assistant/secretary type positions to hold down as well after school.

Mary Jane was accepted into NYU’s musical theatre program at Tisch, and starred in many of their productions. However, she learned that in the real world, auditions were hard to secure and she found obtaining roles was even more difficult. She’d been praised so heavily in high school and during her time at Tisch that this was a harsh slap to the face, though she didn’t give up. She worked at Ellen’s Starlight Diner while in school, and was cast in the off-Broadway production of Heathers as an ensemble role and an understudy to Heather Chandler. Shortly after, she was finally cast in a Broadway production. She was cast as an ensemble part in American Idiot, and she’d never been happier.

After securing her first role, Mary Jane’s name slowly made its way around. She dropped out of school after a lot of consideration, deciding to devote her full attention to work. Her second show was Wicked, another ensemble role though she became Elphaba’s understudy after a few months. She left for the Spring Awakening tour, where she was cast as Wendla.

When the tour ended, Mary Jane experienced a huge wave of auditions due to praise she’d gotten from critics. She landed her first TV role, the main character for a show on a Netflix YA murder-mystery series. Unfortunately, as things went in that genre, she found her character killed off at the finale in the first season. She was brought back to film some flashback type scenes for season two, and then her contract was completed. The rise to fame was quick and unforgiving - MJ went from near constant press and finally feeling like she was making it to nothing. She returned to New York and experienced a drought in auditions, which many actors face. While she knew that, it was a hard pill to swallow after success, and she didn’t want to go back to the diner. An opportunity arose (mostly thanks to her sister’s husband, who worked for Stark Industries and brought up her name and vouched for her) and Mary Jane found herself working for Stark Industries. She was the personal assistant to Tony Stark, and MJ found that she and F.R.I.D.A.Y. worked well together and that she didn’t hate administrative work. It wasn’t acting, but it was a job, and Mary Jane was more than competent in the role. She proved to be organized and efficient, and MJ liked it more than a little. However, before long, the events of Sokovia transpired and MJ found herself without a job. To be fair, she’d quit, finding herself unable to work for Simon Trask and deciding that she’d rather find other opportunities elsewhere.  She’d snagged a role in an off-Broadway production she wasn’t really feeling, and found herself applying for other positions, surprisingly in charity work and using her time at Stark Industries as a reference. She loved performing, would always be an actress at her core, but she found herself searching for something more meaningful. Her time away from film or stage had made her think more clearly on what she wanted in life, and she couldn’t help but feel like she needed more. She snagged a job for a charity in Sokovia, which Mary Jane only really knew about due to the press that had been drawn in after the events that transpired with the Avengers and with the Sokovia Accords. She found herself in the last round of interviews for a job at the UN in Sokovia as the Goodwill Ambassador (she was the right kind of famous, is what they said), and with the charity job already secured, Mary Jane was booking her ticket. 

EXTRAS —

MYERS-BRIGGS: ENFP Sin: Greed & Pride HOGWARTS HOUSE: Slytherin ZODIAC: Scorpio

[margridarnauds]

XCalibur: My Review

So, it’s been a couple of weeks since XCalibur came out and, while I’m trying to sort out my own thoughts about this, I decided to do what I do best: Force everyone to read an overly long, barely coherent post.

First off: Let’s get this off the ground. The fact that we got to see this at ALL was phenomenal. This is really, really fantastic, as a step for KMusicals getting a wider western audience, and it’s something that I DESPERATELY hope that they will continue to repeat in the future. I’d have supported it if it was anything, simply because that would give a clear message that there IS an audience for this.

However...

[warning for spoilers, brief discussions of rape]

Overall Impressions: Look....it’s WILDHORN. Wildhorn and me....we go way, way back. Like, to 12 Year Old Rachel listening to Jekyll and Hyde. And the Scarlet Pimpernel. And....quite a few musicals after that. I CAN’T hate it. It’s WILDHORN + ARTHURIANA. Two of my favorite things in the world. But, that being said....this might very well be my fault, but I did find myself a little disappointed, in the sense that, listening to the cast album, I was expecting a much, much better musical than what I really got. Which was a huge order to fill, given that I’ve always considered Artus: Excalibur to be one of Wildhorn’s more problematic musicals. But, in all fairness, they DID kind of promise me more, given that they retitled the musical and said that this was the “World Premiere”™. The set is fantastic, the music is stunning, but it just felt a little hollow to me.

Sets/Costuming: I LOVED the Dark Ages aesthetic to it. The costumes really were great, Morgana’s in particular stole the show, but Guinevere, Merlin, Arthur, and Lancelot gets some nice looks as well, and it all serves to give this idea of the Middle Ages (albeit HEAVILY preying on the old stereotype that it was The Dark Ages, with a very dark color palette generally being observable throughout). This also serves to make it visually very distinct from the Korean production of La Legende du Roi Arthur, given the two of them showed VERY close to one another. (2019 was just the year of the Arthurian musical.) As a Celticist....it isn’t REALLY historically accurate, it’s still fantasy, albeit more Guy Ritchie’s Arthur VS The Crystal Cave Trilogy in terms of how MUCH fantasy it utilizes. LRA (and Artus: Excalibur) took the approach of it being PURELY fantasy, there is....nothing. Historical. In there. One thing that irked me about Artus was that it, in particular, had a CHEAP feeling, like it had roughly as much thought put into it as a 80s comic book idea of Camelot that they were going to slap on the back of a cereal box or something. (LRA, to its credit, was GLORIOUSLY anachronistic, but it was high budget and sleek. I loved it for that.) XCalibur is TRYING for a more historical feel, and, for the most part, it does succeed. Whether the set is a forest, a deserted hall, or Camelot in its prime, they SELL the medievalism. It’s a bit of a pity there’s no WELSHNESS to it, but that is me being nitpicky about my field not being in there. For an Arthurian adaptation, I’m not really going to ask for anything more; it gives what it promises and it does it well. (Though I will say that, every once in a while, one of those costumes would flash in the stage lighting and I would question whether I’d seen that gold fabric at a Ren Faire etsy. BUT in all fairness, those costumes weren’t designed to be viewed in close up like that, and this is probably me being needlessly mean. OVERALL, the effect was good.)

Music: It’s a Frank Wildhorn musical, so of COURSE I’m going to like the music. This is DEFINITELY a stronger musical than Artus, with several new songs (including “The Tempest”, “Let the Sword Make the Man”, and “If he were standing here”, both of which are highlights to me) that really stand out. Since settling himself firmly in the Asian market, Wildhorn’s stuff has developed a polish that wasn’t really there in his Broadway stuff. It sounds much more modern, much more streamlined, with Death Note, the Man Who Laughs, Robespierre, and Mata Hari all having a distinct SOUND that I’ve started to call Wildhorn 2.0. There’s this distinct energy that runs through this production that wasn’t really there in Artus, and I found that it makes the cast album REALLY a treat to listen to. As with Artus, “Celtic” (which, in this case, of course, means “Riverdance”) musical motifs are present in the instrumentals, but I found it MUCH less heavy handed than before, and it’s evenly balanced out by more traditional tunes. I didn’t feel like it was AS overloaded as before, where I routinely found myself napping in between swelling instrumentals.

As with all of Wildhorn’s stuff, there are certain songs that sound very similar to other musicals of his, if you know what to look for. “Why am I here?” for example is nearly a carbon copy of “Who do you Trust?” from Tears of Heaven and “Wenn das Shicksal dich ereilt” from Rudolf, which themselves form part of a distinct genre of his songs that can be traced back to “The Riddle” from The Scarlet Pimpernel and “You and I” from Svengali. “The Mark of the Wolf”, a new song, sounds very similar at points to “How Many devils?” from The Civil War. Etc. etc. I don't really consider this a BAD part, at least in the case of the former, since the songs in that genre, to me, represent the best of Wildhorn’s music. And, after all, with over 30 years on stage....the man can only come up with new music for so long until he starts producing SOMETHING that sounds similar.

Overall verdict? Strong music. Not my FAVORITE of Wildhorn’s stuff,  but I’ve definitely spent a few hours listening to the cast album on its own merits, and definitely more energetic and polished than the German run to my ear.

Plot: So, a big draw for me was “Has the plot been fixed from the days of Artus: Excalibur?” and.....I have many mixed feelings. I DO feel like we got more of a solid musical, but I also feel like it had some really, really sour notes and, in some ways, the transition to a new musical feels only half-way done. Like, they HAD a new musical in mind, they went halfway through the process, and then they shrugged their shoulders, said “That’s good enough”, and left us with a Frankenstein’s Monster. (Oh, wait, wrong KMusical.)

One of the biggest casualties was Morgana. Morgan le Fay has been one of my favorite characters in anything, ever since I was 7 years old and developing one of my first crushes via The Magic Treehouse. Morgana is always the FIRST one I look to in an adaptation to see how they handle her, and her plotline in Artus always felt weak for me, ESPECIALLY her relationship with Merlin, which Wildhorn once described as something along the lines of a “bit of a romance” but that was painfully underdeveloped, especially on her end. We knew that he was weak for her, to his detriment, we knew that she wanted what he had, and that they do.....the do together, but there’s very little REAL development in there, and no sign, on my end, of that “little bit of romance” as opposed to just. Using one another. When I heard that that plotline had been revised, I was THRILLED. Now, I feel like it was a monkey’s paw situation.

(1) Morgana goes from more or less apathetic to Merlin’s situation to.......being totally obsessed with him, to the point where she says he’s the only man she ever loved? Like, she goes from someone HIGHLY motivated by what she believes is her rightful inheritance to being motivated by Merlin’s dick.

(2) The timeline. My God, the timeline. Making Morgana a child when she’s shipped off AND then doing the “Only man I ever loved” thing (and SEEMING to imply that Merlin did love her as well, but refused to say it) is.....it’s bad. No other way around it. They did NOT think that timeline through.

(3) I HATED Guinevere getting Morgana in the back with an arrow, but you know? That was yet another monkey’s paw situation, given that at least it wasn’t “Morgana falling for a very obvious ploy that she SHOULD have seen coming from a mile away if she wasn’t, as has been established, obsessed with Merlin’s dick.”

I will say that, reworking the plot so that Morgana’s obsessed with Merlin’s dick DID work out better in the sense that at least the Madonna/Whore complex with her and Guinevere isn’t really there: We no longer see Evil, Sexy Morgana VS Sweet Forest Maiden Guinevere, and Guinevere in this version of the musical is allowed to be much gutsier than her German counterpart. They did give her quite a bit of character as opposed to “Naive Girl who believes Arthur is The Best but finds out Wrong”. Now, that gutsiness flies out the window once she marries Arthur and is mainly confined to singing sad songs and stepping in between Arthur and Lancelot, but see above for Frankenstein’s Monster.

I will say that I did appreciate that this adaptation was willing to really give us a DEEPLY flawed Arthur; it’s something I’ve seen relatively little of post-White in terms of Arthurian adaptations, and it’s something I’ve missed. (Once Upon A Time’s Evil Arthur notwithstanding.) Arthur is really rarely allowed to BE a character in his own right, he has to be an Ideal™ or, if he’s a flawed character, flawed in an acceptable, palatable way; here, he’s an angry young man who’s shoved into a position that he’s not really qualified for and has to grow into it. He shoves people away, he shouts, he trusts Morgana too blindly, and he basically causes the Guinevere/Lancelot situation on his lonesome. It’s actually a little great to see.

BUT. But. Monkey’s paw. I LIKED seeing Arthur being a little bitch on occasion, but, for better or worse, he is our main character. And, outside of his bonding scenes with Guinevere and Lancelot early on, we really....don’t get to see that many scenes where he’s LIKABLE. There are a few moments (the scene where he tries to get Morgana to dance at his coronation is ADORABLE), but the first time we’re really introduced to him, he’s in a fight, he (understandably) snaps at Merlin, decides that, hey, being king might not be so bad, is fun for a little while, and then he spends a solid chunk of the second act being a dick because his father died. I don’t really know. I feel like this is going to be one of those things that I keep rolling over in my mind, as far as whether I REALLY like HIM as a main character, or whether I like those individual moments where he’s likable.

A part of me liked that we had, instead of the two siblings fighting during “Was Will Ich Hier”, we have Morgana and Arthur bonding. That sibling bond was, in my opinion, one of the more interesting possible dynamics in the show. But, unfortunately, the resulting conflict with Merlin felt very “been there, done that.” It’s more PLAUSIBLE than in cases where, say, the Enemy of the Week poses as a little girl and suddenly the main cast, who have known one another for twenty years, are suddenly slinging accusations against one another, but it STILL felt rather forced and predictable.

I was actually really grateful that we didn’t have the Morgana/Lot relationship in this particular production--Making Morgana an actual domestic abuse victim and then killing her off NEVER sat well with me, but as a result of that, now we have this situation where we have two more or less unconnected villains: Morgana and Wulfstan, and the plot only really needed one. Wulfstan, as a character, just....isn’t interesting. He’s a more or less generic “Barbarian Warlord” type who’s pissed Arthur killed his son and creeps on Morgana. I can’t REALLY say anything more there. Their plotlines intersect in the very beginning, when they capture Morgana and she guides them to Uther’s old castle, but other than that, there’s a general disconnect between them, and there’s no real PAYOFF to that. Instead, it just feels like it makes the plot needlessly busy.

One thing I’ve noticed, with both La Legende du Roi Arthur and XCalibur, is this pressure to fit as MUCH Arthurian in as possible, and as a result, the final musicals become rather crowded, so there’s no real time for DEVELOPMENT or substance.

“Okay, we have to have the pulling from the sword here!” “Right!” “Hm, Morgana le Fay is one of the most iconic antagonists, we probably need her there.” “Saxons?” “Sure!” “Everyone’s expecting Lancelot and Guinevere, we can’t not have them in there.”

I FEEL like XCalibur is LESS bogged down than LRA with regards to that factor, since the latter also threw in Maleagant as a secondary antagonist to Morgana and the Grail quest, but I still feel like XCalibur bit off more than it could really chew. Which is a pity, because there are Arthurian plot lines that have gotten comparatively little attention in recent days that you could include instead of going the “Paint By Numbers” route.

This also really shows in how it deals with certain plot lines, which are either dropped (Wulfstan V. Morgana), or come out of nowhere. This is REALLY obvious with Lancelot/Guinevere, which is a pity because I found myself, against my own will, rooting for them more than any other pairing in the show. Lancelot goes from a cocky lady’s man to...suddenly being smitten with Guinevere.....and then suddenly, after Guinevere is sad about Arthur being a dick, the two of them are fucking. Now, it would be NATURAL, as far as “Guinevere goes to Lancelot when she feels like Arthur’s being cold to her”, but we don’t SEE that. We literally cut from her in the forest, singing a sad song, and the next time we see them, they’re postcoital. It feels like it comes out of NOWHERE. My investment in them, as a couple, is more due to the strength of the two actors involved than the actual WRITING, which thinks that because the BEDROCK for something is there (”Oh, Guinevere beat Lancelot in combat! Oh, she feels neglected!”) that that means the house is there as well (”Oh, Guinevere beat Lancelot in common....so NOW he’s totally in love with her and is never going to flirt with another woman again. Oh, Guinevere is feeling abandoned by Arthur.......so we don’t NEED to see her going to Lancelot.”) They jump from Point A to point D and the audience is left with a sense of whiplash.

Some things, like Merlin’s actions re: Igraine and Uther, as well as Morgana, are just not explored to a depth that I would really find is satisfactory. “Oh, I did all these terrible things....because of Fate!” is something that we’re REALLY supposed to pull behind, but, given the pain to everyone involved, ESPECIALLY the women (Igraine, Morgana, and Guinevere ALL suffer from Destiny™), you have to REALLY wonder if there was literally anyone else who could have done it.

...so, really. BBC Merlin. BBC Merlin.

MOVING ON FROM MY SALT...as a medievalist, I was actually relatively happy that for ONCE in an Arthurian adaptation, the conflict between Christianity and paganism (WHICH HONESTLY WASN’T EVEN THAT MUCH OF A CONFLICT IN TERMS OF THE CELTIC WORLD, BUT MOVING ON) was presented as being pro-Christian. I’ve dealt with WAY too much media, in my time, that treats, say, 8th century Catholicism in Ireland the same as 16th century Catholicism in Spain, and NO. They were VERY distinct. I am saying this as a confirmed, happy atheist. They were distinct. I do not need or want The Mists of Avalon 10.0 on my screen, no thank you.

That being said...Monkey’s Paw. Monkey’s Paw. I was NOT happy to see the conflict presented as “Christianity taking over is Destined and Good, the Old Ways™ have had their time.” There’s this rather ugly fatalism that runs through it, along with the idea that followers of the pagan tradition HAD to die for Christianity to take its place. It’s...not my favorite thing in the world. Perhaps I’m simply unpleasable in this aspect, but there has GOT to be some medium between the two. Maybe this is my Medieval Irish Bias seeping through here, given that, with what I’m used to, the druids were mentioned in law books through the 8th century. I own this. (”But Rachel,” you might say, reasonably, “This isn’t 8th century Ireland”, to which I would of course say, “BUT IT SURE AS HELL ISN’T 6TH CENTURY WALES OR CORNWALL EITHER.”) Medieval people, historically, while they didn’t REALLY have religious tolerance as we know it, didn’t always see it in stark terms of “PAGANISM IN ONE CORNER, CHRISTIANITY IN ANOTHER”: They were, as a whole, FAIRLY good at integrating aspects of both in, even when they didn’t really mean to. The entire thing is just mangled horribly.

Anyway. Celtic Studies Salt Over.

Actors/Actresses: I’ll be honest, I was expecting, primarily, Morgana, Arthur, and Lancelot to pull the plot along, mainly because they get, together, most of the primary numbers, and because, in the German, Sabrina Weckerlin essentially carried the show on her back. As it was, Kim So Hyang’s Guinevere was the one who REALLY, in my opinion, ended up carrying the show. She had a wonderful voice, strong voice, and her Guinevere was able to make a full, smooth journey between a young, bold girl to the troubled wife of a troubled king to a woman wracked with regret. I’ve seen her in a lot of things, but I don’t think I really NOTICED her until now. She did some truly phenomenal work here, I was really glad, actually, that I got to see and appreciate her Guinevere. (Though, as a Min Kyung Ah fan....I would have LOVED to have seen her Guinevere.) She had great chemistry with both of her leads, lending credibility to both relationships, more than the script itself might really give.

Kai isn’t really an actor I ever really LOOK for in a musical, I wouldn’t say that I’m a MASSIVE fan, but that’s only because I don’t actively search for his stuff. Every time I’ve seen him in something, he’s been solid, and I did very much like him in the press calls. It does seem a little unfair that he got both the press calls AND the pro-shot, but c’est la vie. I did like his Arthur, he had a steady voice to back up the role, his acting was solid. Arthur, as a character, doesn’t REALLY stick out for me, but that isn’t HIS fault so much as the script’s, really, and my pre-built in bias towards Morgana. I didn’t find him to be REALLY likable in the role, very angry and sullen, but.....well. See above for my take on Arthur’s general likability here. I do think the man did the best with what he had, though I also feel like he’s more natural in Arthur’s dorkier, more relatable moments, especially with, say, Guinevere, Morgana, and Lancelot. (Though I’m not sure if that’s because I like Arthur as a CHARACTER more there or if I’m reacting to his ACTING in the role. This is one of those times where I’d have really liked to see Do Kyum or Junsu’s take on the role, since that would help me iron out what parts are the WRITING and what are the actor, but, lacking that, I’m going to err on the side of generosity.)  

Shin Young Sook....I WANTED to like her Morgana. I did. But, I’ll be blunt, even as far back as the press call, I was feeling Jang Eun Ah’s Morgana more, I was, definitely, feeling a little disappointed when the proshot cast list was announced. So, in some ways, the poor woman would have had to have done miracles to get me to REALLY warm up to her. And I didn’t really see miracles on the stage. Her voice remains reliable, she is a belter like few others on the Korean stage. I give her that. But her acting basically totally ruined the character for me. My issues with the role, as detailed in the “Plot” section, aside, I believe that the overall character COULD be salvaged, from an audience perspective, with a nuanced enough portrayal. But, when I saw this particular take on Morgana...I didn’t see MORGANA. I saw Shin Young Sook, Having Fun, instead of Morgana, as portrayed by Shin Young Sook. An actress having fun in a role can definitely be GREAT (Park Hye Na as Eva in Frankenstein is one role of hers I will cherish forever), but in this case, which required a lot of nuance to pull it off and make the villain sympathetic....it does clash when you can tell that she’s one step away from evilly cackling and releasing a final belt before running off the stage. There is a time to ham and there is a time to not, and this was one of the “not” roles. There came some point, perhaps during the song “Desire”, perhaps before it, that I actively started DREADING Morgana appearing on stage. I don’t KNOW that Jang Eun Ah would have done it better. She could have done it worse. But it is a tragedy of only having a single cast available that I will always wonder. I was disappointed here. I was really, really disappointed.

Kim Jun Hyun as Merlin was solid. It’s well known at this point that I have a soft spot for him, but for what it’s worth, on a comparative level, I feel like this role suited him much better than, say, Orléans in Marie Antoinette (where, personally, though still liking him, I found him a little too cold for my taste). He is appropriately distant and otherworldly, showing a human side and conflict as the musical continues. Is he enough to make me LIKE Merlin, as a character? Not really, given how many people suffer because of him and how little the narrative actually QUESTIONS it, but damned if he doesn’t try, and he does lend a subdued charisma to the character, to the point where I know that at least some people noticed him more than they did Arthur or Lancelot. I did think he had -40 chemistry with Shin Young Sook, but that could be because I was ALREADY attached to him and Jang Eun Ah’s chemistry in the press call, and that is not so much a failing on one actor’s side or the other’s (I want to emphasize this, because I do NOT have anything against Shin Young Sook SPECIFICALLY on this point), rather it’s something that can’t really be qualified. (And is entirely subjective, I’m sure that plenty of viewers saw NOTHING wrong.) For me, it did cause me to actively cringe at certain scenes, such as the “This is where your Arthur came from”......”seduction”.....scene.

“Lord....I actually have fewer problems saying no to this than you might think, nvmind.”

It COULD be that that’s the look of conflicting desire, but to me, personally, watching it, it rather looks like Merlin just realized that he forgot to turn the stove off at home. Which is a pity, because I was REALLY going in here expecting to like Merlin/Morgana more than the love triangle and instead found it to be very awkwardly handled. I haven’t ENTIRELY given up on it as a ship, in some abstract way that would involve another rewrite of the entire musical, but I can’t REALLY say that there’s. Anything I like about it either. And I think that if I was less stubbornly determined to find SOMETHING in it to like, I’m fairly certain I would be even more uncomfortable with it.

My final verdict: Watching this, despite some impressive visuals (though not QUITE to the same level as fellow Wildhorn musicals The Man Who Laughs, Dracula, and Mata Hari) and performances, I found myself continually wanting to go back to the cast album rather than actually WATCH the musical. Changes have been made since the German production, but I found that, while some of the changes definitely served to make a stronger musical, some of them actively weakened the show, and it's still a little too busy for its own good. I’m also not REALLY sure that the changes made really justified it being given the label World Premiere™, given the hype around it. If it was available for streaming again, would I do it? Yes, because it IS worth at least one watch and the industry NEEDS to do this more. If it was available to buy, even, for $20 or so, I would probably get it. But I’m not sure that, if it was for the~ $100 price that Toho musicals tend to sell for, I would seriously be able to say “Yes, get this”, and I’m not sure that, if an American/European tour of it was miraculously announced, I would REALLY bend over backwards to get tickets.

6/10

Tl;dr: “WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO MY SISTER?”

[carversourcebe]

Charlie’s interview for Gay Times

What drew you to the role of Huck? Having all these incredible women at the centre of Ratched, and feeling like I got to be part of that change and storytelling, was exciting. Huck, I’ve never played somebody who had any kind of physical disfigurement as Huck, and Ryan gave me enough time to prepare and do my research; just sort of get into that skin, if you will. That was new for me, and challenging! But a challenge is what you want.

Huck is also a war veteran. How did you prepare to embody that kind of character? I read a lot and spent a lot of time daydreaming with the information I extracted from research. What’s so interesting to me about that period, in the history of veterans’ rights and the history of the war, is the attitude towards what was different, particularly WW1 and WW2. I think there was such a different expectation of war as this initiation into manhood, but also this kind of grand adventure. There was an innocence to it. The people that suffered the most coming back from this experience, other than the trauma of being exposed to so much violence, were wounded veterans. They came back and were not supported by society at large, being symbolic of that sort of failure in masculinity in some way. I read a lot about this hospital here in London that pioneered a lot of the techniques for amputees and people who needed facial reconstruction or skin grafting, and it’s heartbreaking – but so sweet – to hear about the communities that formed after WW2 that were largely left out of the narrative. The consistent theme throughout all of that seems to be these young men who wanted a sense of story in their lives, and came back and felt like they had lost everything. This tenderness and sweetness, and the way they treated all of the nurses who treated them with dignity when they felt like they couldn’t be seen in the world, I just found it very moving and that’s where the purity of the character came from.

He is the arguably purest character in the series, and we see that when he bonds with Mildred. He doesn’t witness the horrifying acts committed by Mildred, so, how do you think he perceives her? One of the beautiful details in the costuming that Lou Eyrich, the designer, did was she put an army nurse’s pin on Nurse Ratched’s uniform. That to me, was just this sign that there was this immediate neutral identification between Huck and Nurse Ratched as veterans, as people who understood the trauma of war. Therefore, Huck doesn’t have to hide anything about who he is. His wounds also sort of externalise a lot of the violence that she is so desperately trying to hide or suppress. So, there’s this sort of yin and yang between them – an unspoken understanding. I think because of that, and feeling so seen, Huck trusts Mildred more than anyone and comes to fall in love with her. I think he does believe that her ability to kind of hold space for his experience or his essence is a sign that she is ultimately a good person.

Huck is quite ahead of his time, because he’s one of the only characters who is accepting of the LGBTQ+ community. Why do you think that is? Huck is somebody who feels like they have lost everything, that they will never be treated with dignity because of how they look. I think Huck therefore has a lot of empathy for what Mildred reveals to him. There’s this sense of relief that he’s not being rejected, despite his advances, because of being unattractive or whatever reason he’s telling himself in his head. So, when Mildred shares that vulnerability with him, it’s the truth. I think Huck is somebody who just wants the truth to be spoken and shared.

The series includes some uncomfortable scenes surrounding gay ‘conversion therapy’ in the 1940s. 80 years later, and the practice is still legal in numerous countries around the world. What kind of message is the show trying to convey with this storyline? Well I think it exaggerates but very much tells the story of the brutality of conversion therapy. So often we think… You know, I’ve heard stories of actual violence happening in these conversion therapy settings, but even the mental violence and the shaming, the confusion and all of these tactics that are employed upon young queer people to try and get them to change who they are is a form of violence. This show takes that and makes it visceral. So, I think it is a pretty effective way to convey that ‘conversion therapy’ is wrong but even in the new trailer that dropped the other day this notion of humanity being able to play God just because it has the consent of a medical body, I think the show really tries to probe at that.

That twist with Huck at the end… For me personally, it was the most shocking moment on Ratched. How did you react when you read the script? [Laughs] I know! I knew before I signed up for the job, that that was a part of it, which is kind of an exciting thing as an actor because you know on some level symbolically that the character has fulfilled their part. They’ve achieved something. So pulling that and working backwards in a way and trying to create the biggest arc for the character, by the time Huck passes away – can I even say that? – I felt like he’d finally found a sense of strength and compassion and love for himself. Mildred gave him that when she insisted that he become head nurse. He died in the line of duty and that’s exactly how he would’ve wanted to go. But it is sad, especially when you really start to feel like… Some of those last scenes that I had with Sarah, they’re just so fun to act and were so beautifully written, and to think that the relationship you had with the character is suddenly done, it’s sad. It’s hard. But the funny thing was, I think the very next or the day after, I started principal photography on The Boys In The Band!

You didn’t even have time to mourn! [Laughs] Yeah. That was a solid, for sure!

You’ve collaborated with Ryan Murphy several times, and so has Sarah Paulson, but this was your first time on a project together – what was it like working with her? Yes. The first time I collaborated with Ryan was on the Broadway production of The Boys In The Band actually, and I’d known Sarah. Sarah’s good friends with a lot of those boys and I’d spent time with Sarah in New York, but we had never worked together. It is that thing of… I love Sarah, she just lights the room and she’s so fun, but suddenly you’re acting across from Sarah Paulson as opposed to the Sarah that you spend time with! I was pinching myself. I was pinching myself quite often through filming the show and just going, ‘Oh my god, this is Sarah Paulson. I better show up.’

Let’s move onto The Boys in the Band. How did you find that experience, moving from theatre to TV with this incredible ensemble cast? It was such a gift to have the entire Broadway cast and the Broadway creative team, and then having a lot of the film crew from Ratched and the creative crew moving over to do The Boys In The Band as well, as a part of the Ryan Murphy world. I will never have another experience like that and as Jim Parsons said very recently in an interview, I can’t imagine doing anything differently from now on. We all knew the words [laughs]. We knew the story, but that’s not always the case when you show up to a set. To have that sense of trust amongst the cast and crew and with the director, and having a large part of everybody there be out and proud, it was just so fun. It was so fun and because it’s all shot in pretty much one location, we shot it in chronological order, which also rarely happens on a set. Every day was just… We knew what we’d done and we knew where we were heading and had nice little lunch breaks and great catering and it was a real gay old time. It was great.

Did you face any obstacles with the new format? Well I think at the beginning it’s a question of how do you modulate a performance that you’ve done so many times in the theatre and keep it fresh and bring it down more, into a filmic reality? The biggest challenge for me was that in the Broadway production, you’re so used to having the audience and the laughs give you a sense of rhythm. A lot of the jokes are very traditional like, ‘Blah blah blah, one, two,’ whatever. It’s almost like a sitcom, right? But on a film set, there aren’t any laughs, so how do you tell the truth and not ham it up and kind of bring it into a more natural place? So, the first day was just a little nerve-wracking because you’re trying to figure out what that’s going to feel like, then from that point on we all kind of had found our respective new space and ran with it.

Like Huck, Cowboy is pure and kind-hearted. However, he’s constantly mistreated and undermined by the other characters. You’ve played him since 2018 – why do you think the boys treat him like the butt of some joke? I think they’re envious of his youth and maybe his looks, the sort of kindness with which he responds to everything. There’s a straightforwardness too, and warmth to Cowboy, where he’s just going to say exactly what is on his mind and he perceives something as literal as possible. I guess you could say he’s dumb, and that’s easy to make fun of, but he’s almost invincible because of it. The other characters are trying to get something to land on him and they can’t quite ever do it [laughs].

They say some pretty awful stuff to him, and he does not flinch. I love him? [Laughs] He’s just a puppy! He’s just excited to be around these cool, wealthy Manhattan gay guys. It’s not where he’s from. I love him too! It was another opportunity to do some research, just because I’m into that and I’m kind of a book worm. Reading about gay life in 1960s New York, 1950s New York, particularly the world of hustlers and some of the bars, Stonewall and such, it was a lot of the outsiders of the queer community that gathered there. Then, some of the wealthy John’s who were there to meet the hustlers. I think Cowboy, out of all the characters in that play, is just the most used to everybody, because his version of New York includes the entire breadth of the community, so the birthday party for him is ​his ​birthday party.

Attitudes towards sex workers have shifted since 1968, although work still needs to be done – do you think the characters look down on him because of his profession? I think it’s a combination of everything. I don’t think that it’s his profession entirely. I think there’s always been a little more understanding of tolerance and of acceptance of sex work in the gay community, the queer community. But no, I think he’s just sort of an alien. I don’t think he’s the kind of sex worker that they’re expecting.

Cowboy is another unique character. He doesn’t feel insecure about his sexuality or his profession… I think he is. It’s sort of what I was saying a little bit ago about the scene he belongs to New York, and where he comes from. I mean, you have to get specific here. But, I think he’s just representative of what’s about to happen, in some ways. 1969 is when Stonewall explodes and the gay rights movement begins, and I think Cowboy is emblematic of that. He is the only character in a play who doesn’t have a name, who is open toand open with everyone about who he is and what he does, and has zero hangups. I think there’s something very sweet and special about that.

If Ryan Murphy proposed a spin-off for Cowboy, would you do it? ​[Laughs] Obviously. Obviously! Cowboy and the John’s, I’m into it.

Why do you think the story of The Boys in the Band still resonates so well in 2020? I think it’s the subject of shame. It certainly is the project of so many of our lives, as members of the LGBTQ+ community. How do we reckon with and overcome or not entirely live with our shame? And then, in what ways can we teach the human community at large about that experience and what it means, and how we deal with it? So, as long as there is any kind of marginalisation that happens in the world, a story like The Boys In The Band is a universal one. You’ve got these characters who have all of these different ways of trying to deal with their self-loathing and a lot of the time, it’s funny and beautiful and so… entertaining. What’s really beautiful about the play is halfway through, you see just how destructive living with that level of shame and self-hatred is, and anybody can connect to that story.

Ryan Murphy and his production company have hundreds of projects in the works at the moment – can we expect ‘Charlie Carver’ to appear in the credits for any of these? [Laughs] No… And I couldn’t tell you if that were the case!

Link for the article here

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Embrace your past and get to know your friends’ fandom origins!

Rules: Post gifs of your fandoms / ships starting with your most current hyperfixation and work backwards. (Bonus points if you share any stories about how or when you got into that ship! But not necessary!!) Then tag anyone whose fandom history you’d like to learn about!

 @ilackallhonour​ has tagged me in this, and usually I’m really bad at actually joining in, but this one really got me thinking back on all my old fandoms and hyperfixations. I didn’t really do shipping until a few years ago, might have something to do with my recently discovered ace-ness :’)

I always had fantasies that I was part of the world of that particular hyperfixation at time. Of course very heroic and awesome, and very close to my favorite character. Alas, real life is disappointing in that regard.

Merlin/Arthur, I never watched the show when it first came out. Mostly because I can be a bit stubborn and when a lot of people keep telling me that I should totally watch something because I will love it, I refuse to watch it. Don’t know why I’m like that. Turned out, I totally did love it, and binged it like crazy. Also shipped Arthur/Merlin like crazy. Was really disappointed in the ending, and thus, turned to fic. For me, when I’m really obsessed with a show or book I just cannot let go and will read fic until eventually my fixation dies out.

The Umbrella Academy, I don’t really ship anyone, except maybe bromances, and their sibling relationships (Five and Vanya <3 Klaus and Diego <3<3). Man, I love this show, I binged it when it first came out, immediately watched again, got other people to watch it, and watched it again so I could talk to them about it some more. Of course turned to fic, but got a bit eww-ed out, because there was a lot of shipping going on and I didn’t dig it (too each their own, though).

Black Sails, uuuugh I can’t with this show. @Ilackallhonour actually got me curious about it because all the stuff she posted and reblogged. And damn, was it a life changer. I’ve always had a bit of a weird obsession with ships and that time period, but more from Dutch, and VOC perspective. Still, the setting immediately hooked me in, but I really stayed for the story, the characters…Silver. Oh damn. And Silver/Flint, oh double damn.

Sterek. Really, I can’t even say I liked Teen Wolf that much, although I did enjoy the first few seasons. But I stayed for every glimpse of Sterek I could catch. The first time Derek shoved Stiles into the wall I was screaming at my TV, NO WAY there are no people shipping that. Dude, that’s so canon it hurts! But well, the show turned into a big dumpster fire, and I found the online fandom. Got an AO3 account just so I could bookmark and comment and give out kudos so my favorite Sterek fic. And there are tons of fics. I can admit it, I was an addict. I can’t go on AO3 without drowning back in fandom hell, so I keep off it. Really, it was a problem. I was reading fic ALLLL the time. When I should’ve been working, sleeping, socializing, etc. Followed so many Sterek blogs on Tumblr, but wanted my sanity back so unfollowed them all. Sorry @andavs​, I still love your blog, and your art, and your fics sooooo much, but it was too big of a problem *sigh*

Harry Potter, of course. My favorite character was Fred, and got very upset when people tried to convince me he was exactly the same as George. NO HE ISN’T! He’s the idea guy!! Lol. It’s been a while since I’ve read the books, and not sure how much of that is true anymore. Back then I didn’t really do shipping, but now I’m a Drarry shipper, haha. The fics are just so goooood.

Gilmore Girls, duuuude. This show shaped my life. Every time I’m one a re-watch I’m like…oh thát’s where I got that from! I copied character traits and sense of humor and stuff into my own personality. Didn’t like the new episodes much, but that won’t destroy my love for the Gilmores.

Veronica Mars, same as with Gilmore Girls really. Huge impact on my life. Love the snarkiness, and yeah did have some ships in there. Actually did like the new season (though I hated the movie), but they did LoVe dirty man.

I should put Supernatural in this list too, although I feel like I abandoned the show and am not a true fan. I was obsessed with it for so long though. Those first seasons were so great, I loved the relationship between Dean and Sam (in a platonic, totally brotherly way because I do not like incest-y things) and the normal everyday hunting things part of the show. But than all the demons and angels en Gods came and I got a bit tired of the endless cycle of dying and being brought back to life, evil turned to good turned to evil turned to good thing. I’m of the opinion that shows should have an end. Just like three or four seasons, tops. Just finish it with a good, solid ending. Don’t drag it along until it dies an ugly death.

And now unto some total different things, that shaped my childhood. Hard to find a GIF for these books, but what is fandom without some cool art ^_^

 Tomorrow when the war began, by John Marsden. I was obsessed with these books, and read them over and over again, even now I’m not tired of them and could get lost in them before I finished the first page.

Wheel of Time, Robert Jordan. This series really got me into the fantasy genre back then. I had no idea of any of the fantasy cliché’s, or Arthur legends yet, so I wasn’t tired yet of all the same old tropes. I find it a lot harder now to read them, but back then I saved money to be able to buy them as soon as a new one came out, and re-read the entire series up till that point before I read the new one.

Cats the (broadway) musical. Me and my little sister watched the movie version of this show over and over again, every time focused on a different cat. We knew all the lyrics, we knew all the cats. We knew every little thing there was of them to know. We named our black cat (we ..I demanded a black cat) Misty, for Mistyfollees (she’s a girl you see, so we couldn’t name her Mistofollees). I even wrote some fic for it, haha.

(note: I tried really hard to find another GIF but there’s none) Elfquest, oooh Elfquest. This was my truest and biggest obsession, I think. I created my own elf characters, joined online RPG forums to write stories about our own characters, met up with other fans, dressed like a favorite character. A lot of the friends I have now, I met at those forums. I’m still low-key trying to collect the better-looking English paperbacks of the series, but am in no hurry to finish it, and don’t really read them anymore anyway. And my ship? Skywise/anyone, haha. I love Skywise so damn much. And his and Cutter’s relationship is everything (who’s Leetah? Fuck Leetah).

Tagging @stormnyk​ @andavs​  (I tagged you already anyway, sorry ;p) @imperfectimpostor96​

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Oliver & Company

So... now we’re into the part of the watch-thru where I start telling personal stories from my childhood.  I’m sorry in advance, except not really.  I didn’t see it in the theater - I was still too young - but -- I remember all the merchandise! McDonalds had these little plastic toys, and I had one of Georgette, and we had it for years and years, well into the 90s.  We may have eventually given it away at a garage sale, but my one vivid memory on the release of this movie is that. 

Anyway... interestingly, I didn’t see this movie until I was much, much older, and I was kinda meh about it.  But I had only seen it the one time, and much like 101 Dalmatians, I really enjoyed this one!  It’s definitely not my favorite of these movies, as in I’m not rushing back to see it again any time soon, but it’s an cute little movie. 

The thing that stands out to me, though, is that beyond Great Mouse Detective, we’ve really turned in a corner. Unlike the dreary and drabness of the past half dozen films, we’ve now gone bright, colorful and upbeat, and it’s a really welcome change.  Part of it is that there’s a new crew in charge and a new crew doing the animation and they seemed to be able to breath life into an animation studio that had been basically dying for about a decade.  

So.  Oliver and Co is really an updated version of Oliver Twist.  There’s plenty of similarities going on here, and it’s a decent adaptation of the Dickens novel, which is pretty amazing for a Disney film, because they like to throw the source material out the window.  It’s update for New York in the 80s, which is kind of fascinating, because rarely do these movies take place in the present.  But this movie is a time capsule of the 80s in NYC, and it’s really kinda neat -- especially since I remember this time period, and it’s authentic in a cartoony way.  That kind of added to the fun of the movie, actually. 

So, Oliver is this cute little tabby cat voice by an adorably young Joey Lawrence - which I did not know back then but I do now and omg, it’s the cutest thing.  Dodger is Billy Joel - who does pretty well, even if he’s laying on the accent pretty thick.  There’s an eccentric cast of characters who are a lot of fun, too, including Cheech Marin voicing a chihuahua, which is kind of amazing.  Bette Midler is around as well, and while she’s amazing as always -- I think she’s a little held back, tbh. But really, over all the characters are fun. 

The villain is a little forgettable (I don’t even remember his name) but he does have a really gruesome death -- I was kind of surprised when they showed him being hit by a train.  

I thought the animation was fine on this one.  A little Saturday Morning Cartoon-y in some places.  My brother, though, was driven nuts - because it’s ‘too smooth and not enough shading’.  **shrugs** idk, it was bright and not dreary, and not terrible, which is a welcome change.  

The music is fun.  It’s all 80s pop music, which is totally appropriate, and totally in line for the films that are about to follow it.  Bette Midler also does a Broadway number, which is good, but again, they really shouldn’t have held her back.  Why Should I Worry is easily the best number -- and I still have it stuck in my head right now!  

The weird part about all of this -- despite the cast being good, and the songs being good, and the plot being solid it’s still not... quite Disney’s best.  There’s something about that feels a little lacking, though I’m not sure what.  But, I think it’s more like this is a rough draft of the fun musicals Disney is going to be known for coming up.  

Other thoughts: 

The Butler’s name is not Jeeves, which makes me sad.  I can’t think of a fictional story where the butler’s name is actually Jeeves.  Where did that even come from then?

I looked up 1125 5th Avenue, NYC - and apparently there’s a building there.  According to Google Earth it’s 5th Avenue Millennium Aesthetic Surgery.  Sure.  And yes, I totally looked it up on Google Earth as one does. 

Where are Penny’s parents? This really bothers me that they are not around AT ALL.  

Not-Jeeves is totally into wrestling, and that’s kinda hilarious.  I love when these side characters get fun quirks. 

There’s a part near the beginning when all of Disney’s old, famous dogs show up -- like Pongo from 101 Dalmations, and a few from Lady and the Tramp.  My brother reminded me that Pongo would be dead by now and it’s probably his grandson, lol. 

This is where we do get kinda meta in general -- The chihuahua sings High Ho.  

 There’s more kidnapping in this movie -- why is this a theme that’s been three out of the last five films? Weird. 

JAC Redford scored the film - he also scored the second and third Mighty Ducks movies.  Yes, I recognized the name in the credits. 

Final Thoughts: It’s a fun and sweet movie, which has more energy in it than the dreary bunch that had come before it.  I’m so glad we’re getting into fun Disney again.