#that's one of my favorite things to write actually
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jo-harrington · 1 day ago
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Blueberry Muffin (Eddie Munson x Reader)
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Summary: Eddie notices you're good at sharing your food. A little too good.
Pairings/Relationships: Older!Eddie Munson/Reader
Warnings/Themes: Established relationship, Food/Eating, Angst, Hurt/Comfort, Fluff, Brief mention of financial concerns, Discussion of trauma from previous relationships
Note: This is something entirely personal to me, it was something my ex did one-upon-a-time ago. But, like with everything else, Eddie Munson is a powerful tool to help you get over some of your issues. This fic might not be the best, but it helped me work through some old issues. And I'm pretty proud of that.
Shoutout to @undead-supernova who inspired me to write this while we were chatting about her excellent fic We Are Going To Be Friends, and @dr-aculaaa who is one of my lifetime mutual trauma ride-or-dies and told me my ex was actually trash (and they were trash).
You can find my masterlist here.
Please do not interact if you are not 18+.
Enjoy!
---
If there was one thing that was the key to yours and Eddie's relationship, it was food.
Before there even had been a relationship, food had been one of the keystones of your friendship. You met at a friend's thanksgiving potluck, you always planned your outings around where you'd eat and the snacks you’d get, and during the group road trip up to Milwaukee for Mac and Cheese Fest, he'd finally gotten the courage to ask you out.
Food was life. You both agreed.
You were always good about sharing your food.
You, as in the two of you, sure. But specifically you.
It wasn't until the two of you were together and spent more time alone with each other that Eddie realized just how good you were at sharing.
Actually, good wasn't the right word.
Meticulous was more accurate.
If you took a bite of his burger when you went out for dinner, he had to have a bite of your pasta.
If you bought a pint of ice cream to share during movie night, you matched each bite spoon for spoon. However, if after a certain point of sharing he insisted that you could have the rest of the pint because it was your favorite flavor, the pint would inevitably make it back into the freezer without another spoonful taken.
On and on it went.
He tried to ignore it, but once he noticed it, it was hard not to.
At first, he thought that it was some relic of a less-than well-off childhood. Like Eddie, you'd grown up with a single parent and were occasionally foisted off on well-intentioned relatives to watch you while your mom worked. Thankfully, food was never scarce for either of you, but the fact that you'd been forced to grow up quicker than the others made you aware of generic-branded groceries and your mothers stretching their dollars and the pursing of lips when the bills came for special occasion meals out.
After a while, though, that reasoning disappeared. Yes, there were still habits that you formed from your mother's frugality but never to the point of anxiety.
This was something else.
And it all came to a head the day you brought home a bag of leftovers from work.
"Tom always orders too much when the execs visit the warehouse," you explained excitedly as you proudly showed off a plastic container of some gourmet salad and a few wax paper-wrapped sandwiches.
Then came the pastries.
A cherry danish you grabbed for Eddie specifically, and a pistachio-cream filled croissant that Eddie had heard you gush about a million times over. A few tiny cream puffs that both of you eagerly popped into your mouths.
And one blueberry muffin.
"Oh!" You faltered at the sight of it and then looked back into the obviously empty paper bag. "I thought there had been two."
"That's ok," Eddie shrugged. "We can just split it."
"No!" you snapped at him, your eyes wide. "You can have it."
"Sweetheart, I know you love muffins as much as I do," Eddie scoffed. "We'll just split it. No big deal. It's a pretty big muffin."
He watched as you worried at your lower lip for a long, drawn out moment before you nodded.
He kissed the side of your head and turned to grab plates and drinks. He carried as much as he could out to the living room so you could eat dinner in front of the TV. When he returned to your side to grab the food and start plating up your plunder, he stopped in his tracks at what he found.
Splitting a muffin was a no-brainer, typically. Or so Eddie thought. Just peel the paper lining and split that sucker in half. But there you stood, knife held in a shaky hand, shifting back and forth a few millimeters every so often, trying to find the exact equator of the confection before you so it could be cut in equal halves.
"What are you doing?" Eddie asked as gently as he could, but you still flinched, and when you looked up at him, your eyes looked glassy.
"Just cutting the muffin in half," you tried to laugh and play it off, but Eddie could see through the facade.
"It's just a muffin," he tried to offer, as though reminding you that it was, indeed, just a muffin would break you from this fit.
"It is," you looked down again, almost in shame. "Isn't it?"
He let you have a second, let you put the knife down and take a few deep breaths to calm yourself. When you nodded and held yourself a little more confidently, Eddie closed the distance and split the muffin in half by hand, right down the middle along the score line you had started.
And he pretended that he didn't notice the way you'd held your breath while he did it.
"Let's have dinner then," he suggested.
---
"You gonna tell me what all that was about?" Eddie asked once dinner was almost over, his mouth full of cherry danish, crumbs spewing from his lips as he spoke.
You ignored him for a second, picked at your own laminated pastry, until he continued.
"You know I always thought your mom really hammered the sharing is caring thing with you. But you went full King Solomon on that muffin and...I know that look in your eyes because I've seen it in the mirror a ton of times. That was fear. That was pain. So, are we gonna talk about it?"
You sighed and considered telling him no, you wouldn't be telling him jack shit, but...how many times had you pried into things that you really had no place asking about and he still told you anyway. That's how communication worked; that's how a relationship worked.
And that was how you got into this mess wasn't it?
"You remember my shitty ex?" you began tentatively, with a question.
"Shitty ex Number 1," Eddie scoffed. "Or shitty ex Number 2?"
"Number two."
"Should've known," he said under his breath but nodded for you to continue. "Alright, so what else did they do?"
Because the list had been...extensive already, you were loath to admit.
But you were with Eddie now, and things were infinitely better. You could work through these hurdles with him.
"It all started when we still worked at the mall together," you began. "Before we even started dating, actually. We'd meet on breaks and shoot the shit and one day, the little bakery only had one blueberry muffin."
You glared at the split muffin sitting on a plate on the coffee table, as though it was at fault, and not your ex.
"We decided to split it. Nothing wrong with that. We only had a fifteen, it was just a snack. But when they went to split the muffin...they took the muffin top, and left me with the stump."
"The...stump?" Eddie asked slowly, unable to comprehend.
"Yeah," you leaned forward and tapped on the base of the muffin that had previously been encased in paper. "The stump."
"That's...only assholes split a muffin that way." He paused and considered it. "But it's Shitty Ex Number Two. So I shouldn't expect anything less."
"I didn't think anything of it then," you continued. "Or the next hundred times we split a blueberry muffin on breaks, even when we started dating. They would always get the delicious, crispy, sugary muffin top, and I would always get the stump. Half-clinging to the wrapper, maybe a blueberry burned on the bottom. Never an equal half, always less-than!
"Until one day, there was this especially delicious looking muffin. It wasn't even at the mall, we were on a real date! At a real, nice bakery. With blueberry muffins, because that was our thing, and I made the mistake of asking if I could have the muffin top. Just once. And they looked at me like...like I just asked them to sacrifice their mother or something."
You felt your lip tremble, and the familiar sting of tears in your eyes.
That sense of loathing that you always felt when you thought of that moment, or really any time you got a blueberry muffin.
You took a breath and said, "they just told me that if I really loved them, I would let them have the damn muffin top. Because it was their favorite."
"That's bullshit!" Eddie got to his feet, arms thrown up in the air. "Sorry sweetheart, that's bullshit and, I'm sorry but, you deserved so much better. You deserve to have half a muffin. Half of the whole muffin, not just the stump. Fuck, you deserve the whole damn muffin yourself! It’s just a muffin!"
"I know!" You shouted back at him, causing him to stop his ranting and raving. "Don't you think I know that? It’s just a muffin and I shouldn’t have had to make myself accept less than what I deserved but it was the first in a long line of things where they made me feel like I wasn’t worth half. I wasn’t worth anything. And if I tried to prove that I was, to them and to myself, I would look crazy. Because it’s just a muffin.
“That's why I started...that's why I started taking what I deserved. I started taking half, instead of giving everything Eddie. If you get a bite, I get a bite. With everything. Because I deserve it!"
You thought of the way you had to meticulously tried to split the blueberry muffin earlier.
"Maybe...maybe I take it a little too far sometimes," you muttered, letting the tears finally fall. "Because I don't want to be selfish like they were, and take more from you than you deserve."
"Baby," Eddie dropped back onto the couch and corralled you into his embrace, pecking kisses to the side of your head. "Who fucking cares? Don't worry about me. Shit, I'll give you anything you want. I'll take anything you leave behind. I'll give you my whole cheeseburger at Benny's, if only you asked for it. And if you left me one singular pickle chip, I'd take it without complaint."
"I would never ask you," you laughed wetly.
“No, but you could ask, that’s the point. And I would give it to you.”
"I know I could. And I know you would...I just...I can't break myself from the habit. Not yet, at least."
"I get it," Eddie said into your hair as he continued dropping kisses. "The shitty exes leave their scars and you do your best to keep from opening the wounds up again. I get it."
You knew. You both had your fair share of scars.
---
It took a few minutes, as you basked in one another's comforting presence, before you inevitably shared the damn muffin you brought home. Eddie insisted on letting you take an extra bit off his muffin top, even when you rolled your eyes and told him to stop.
Neither of you brought it up again for a few days, but you both were a little more conscientious when you shared food.
You made nachos for his Friday night DnD session with the guys and he left you the core nacho that held everything together; it was extra gooey with cheese, and loaded with jalapeños. You made sure to take an extra big bite of his pint of rocky road when he offered, even if he didn't want a single bite of your rum raisin. And when it was his turn to take bites of your food, you didn't pay attention to how much or how little he took.
It still felt a little wrong, but it was insanely healing. You didn't need to worry about keeping things fair and equal with Eddie; your relationship was already fair and you were equals.
And of course, Eddie kept your revelation at the forefront of his mind to hold you accountable to your own bullshit. He noticed when you fell into old habits before you could and even came up with a form of punishment if you subconsciously made sure to take the same number of bites off a shared plate as he did:
He would give you a vegetable off his plate.
"I'm not a fan of broccoli anyway," he grinned cheekily, waving his fork with the aforementioned green in front of your face one night at dinner.
"You're an idiot," you shook your head, but took the bite regardless.
It was slow and steady, but you were getting over the hurdle together.
Then one day, the unexpected happened.
You were at work, doing your little mindless computer work as you did, when your coworker called your name from the front of the office.
"Is it your birthday or something?" Jill laughed as she hauled something through the sea of cubicles.
"No, did someone get me flowers or something?" you asked and stood from your desk to meet her halfway.
"You can't eat flowers," she said as she turned the corner, holding a massive basket.
Full of blueberry muffins.
You didn't need to read the card tied to the cellophane-wrapped basket full of baked goods to know who it was from, but you did anyway to satisfy your coworkers' curiosity.
And they didn't quite understand it, but it made your heart melt.
I didn't ask if they sold a basket of only the tops, because I didn't want them to think either of us were sociopaths. It’s just a blueberry muffin. But you're worth every muffin in this damn basket, sweetheart. Never forget that. Love, Eddie
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octahyde · 2 days ago
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Ok actually one thing that really really bothers me about how widespread people are negatively reacting to the anime just for the fact that anime onlys are going to be in the fandom is like
This is going to make TWST so much more accessible
Like… not everyone can sit down for several hours and read a visual novel. It’s very time and focus intensive. Not everyone can read logs of the dialogue on wikis, either. There are several people who are unable to enjoy this story based solely on medium. A good example is my qpp; he loves TWST. He loves the story. He loves the characters. But he can’t get past Book 3 because the format is completely inaccessible to him. He’s tried. I’ve tried with him. He just… cannot do it. The novels are a godsend because it’s a way he can finally read the story in a format that works for him. The anime will also help a lot because he’ll be able to hear the voice acting, which is a very important part of TWST’s story telling.
Or even just in general, I don’t think I need to post about how I Like Horror, but I am unable to read anything longer than a short story. In particular, I am almost fully unable to read King because of how incompatible his writing style is- despite really wanting to. I have tried and failed to read Pet Sematery more times than I can count. The 80’s movie, though? I love it. It lets me experience a very important work to the genre in ways I would otherwise be completely unable to. Same with Misery.
Like… it’s super frustrating to see people advocate for story accessibility in things like video games, only to turn around and say “except for things I LIKE, they’ll get my favs wrong!!!” Especially when it’s in a fairly inaccessible medium.
I especially have a bone to pick with Idia fans I see on Twitter doing this. There’s a lot of fear “normies” will be ableist about their favorite cartoon character, while… in the process being extremely ableist to actual human beings. It’s extremely frustrating and upsetting to see people prioritize their (heavily mentally disabled, I might add) favorite fictional character over actual irl disabled people. I don’t think people, especially autistic people who can’t do VNs, should be limited from a beautiful story just because other people you can block Might Make Incel Jokes.
(My qpp? He’s autistic. And schizophrenic. And has CPTSD. He relates a LOT to Idia just from what I’ve told him about her and her arc.)
Like… get your fucking priorities straight. I was hyperfixated on Danganronpa when the DR1 anime came out. I was hyperfixated on Persona 4 when the P4 anime came out. Ace Attorney has been one of my absolute favorite series since middle school, and I was going through my obligatory hyperfixation phase I have every few years when the AA anime came out. I massively prefer the YuGiOh manga to the DM anime.
Anime onlys are EXTREMELY easy to avoid and are not the fucking end of the world.
Especially in a fandom with so many autistic people. Have some empathy for disabled people who have different symptoms than you do.
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naamahdarling · 23 hours ago
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So, the other night in an effort to show a friend that LLMs can produce very credible fiction and relatively inventive ideas, I played with ChatGPT for about 10 minutes I was able to make my point flawlessly. Don't get up my ass about this, that's juvenile.
ChatGPT has watched enough Dropout to be able to reasonably (and genuinely amusingly) impersonate Brennan Lee Mulligan and, to a lesser extent, Sam Reich. It's successfully produced a script for Game Changer where the show was entirely about cats and Brennan couldn't win, and parts of it were actually funny. It also produced an AITA post from the point of view of Brennan Lee Mulligan AS DM OF DIMENSION 20 that was in places absolutely hilarious.
It is able to very successfully postulate a set of G1 my little ponies that do not actually exist, complete with colors, cutie marks, and back card stories. It had a little trouble with G1 versus G4 due to the sheer glut of content, but its ideas were genuinely appealing because the source material it was drawing on was designed to be appealing.
It generated a list of birthday party themes that would terrify an arachnophobe, two or three of which were really good. A request for it to generate a list of queer pride birthday ideas didn't produce anything particularly original, but it was all appropriate and convincing.
It produced a short script where Johnny Sims from the Magnus archives receives birthday gifts from his coworkers, and one of those was a knife-wielding tentacle. This script was in places a little less sharp than the actual writing, but it absolutely nailed the speech patterns, and each gift was appropriate to the character giving it. It was genuinely funny. In places it was clever. It actually made me laugh.
I have most of these saved if anybody wants to see them instead of playing with it themselves.
It really isn't a question of what has been dumped into the data set. We can just assume it has been dumped in there somehow.
We can't undo what has been done and we're never going to be able to name all of the people whose work has been used to train these datasets.
I have both positive and negative feelings, strong ones on both sides, about this technology. If someone wants to use this technology to create a script for a movie in the Predator franchise, or a sequel to their favorite book, or whatever, that is a neutral act. Profiting from that is highly questionable, passing it off as the real thing is completely indefensible, using this technology to replace writers and artists and real people doing ANY work where there is no benefit to humans (like identifying cancer cells -- "AI" does that) is the second worst thing that can be done with it.
That's what worries me about this. It could produce infinite Simpsons episodes without the need for a single writer. Eventually it will be able to animate them so accurately you could ask it to make it look like it had been recorded on a video cassette and it would be completely convincing. It would be able to imitate the voice actors perfectly.
We do not want corporations to have that power. Worker protections are critical. It isn't that AI produces art that is bad or soulless or whatever. Those are completely spurious arguments and irrelevant to any true discussion of whether or not it is ethical.
What matter is is that we keep this shit out of the hands people who want to delete us from the workforce. They aren't going to delete the data. We need to protect workers.
P.S. Artists, Disney and Adobe do not have your best interests at heart. Copyright issues are more complicated than they are being presented, and if you find yourself on the side of one of these companies in any capacity, re-examine literally everything you think immediately. Unions. You want unions.
For reference, because I think it's really important to bring this up as often as possible, the worst application of this technology I can think of would be deliberately or accidentally misapplying data that could be used to affect things like a person's medical care, criminal record, and credit score, all of which are actually currently things that a single company can do, APPRISS, now owned by Equifax, yes that Equifax, and fucking nobody, none of y'all, are freaking out about that even though it's the single most frightening thing I have seen in 20 years. I cannot overstate its potential to utterly destroy the lives of literally anyone who comes into contact with the system that uses it, and those are unbelievably common. They are currently selling their product to law enforcement so that cops and businesses can use it to predict who will engage in criminal behavior, I'm literally not kidding about that, they come right out and say it. It is being trained on existing data and refined constantly.
Enjoy breaking your leg and needing painkillers, which get you flagged in a medical database that will try to prevent you from accessing them in the future (already happening), and also entering you into a law enforcement database that knows you have taken them. Then add in whatever eldritch fuckery bringing credit bureaus into it would cause.
We aren't fucked, I'm not a doomer who insists that all people are terrible and that we have no future and we might as well let things burn, I do actually care about the world we live in and the people who populate it and I consider humans a delight rather than a plague, but we need to start seriously resisting the use of this shit by entities more powerful than us. They are already way ahead.
“I can now say with absolute confidence that many AI systems have been trained on TV and film writers’ work. Not just on The Godfather and Alf, but on more than 53,000 other movies and 85,000 other TV episodes: Dialogue from all of it is included in an AI-training data set that has been used by Apple, Anthropic, Meta, Nvidia, Salesforce, Bloomberg, and other companies. I recently downloaded this data set, which I saw referenced in papers about the development of various large language models (or LLMs). It includes writing from every film nominated for Best Picture from 1950 to 2016, at least 616 episodes of The Simpsons, 170 episodes of Seinfeld, 45 episodes of Twin Peaks, and every episode of The Wire, The Sopranos, and Breaking Bad.”
😡
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starryal1na · 2 days ago
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—❀ ‧₊˚. 𝑳𝒊𝒌𝒆 𝒑𝒆𝒕𝒂𝒍𝒔 𝒅𝒂𝒏𝒄𝒊𝒏𝒈 𝒂𝒓𝒐𝒖𝒏𝒅
genre: fluff, sfw
word count: 850
characters: aventurine, boothill, sunday, dr ratio
notes: this is just soft random thoughts i have about them and needed to write down, no theme in particular, dr ratio wearing glasses does things to me (*≧ω≦*), special thank to my irl friend charlotte (<3) for proofreading this ! divider credit to @/cafekitsune ♡
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─ ⊹ ⊱ Aventurine ⊰ ⊹ ─
Owning himself plenty of jewelry, such as rings or expensive watches, it makes sense that Aventurine would want to gift his lover all kind of sumptuous pieces. Over the years, he has had you displayed with pearly necklaces, the shiniest earrings and even rings with precious gemstones. Undoubtedly you loved every single one of them. Each gift Aventurine has given you were meaningful to you, as a symbol of his deep affection for you. However, you must admit you have a favorite one. A gift from one of your anniversary that you adore more than anything. It might be the most classic piece of jewelry you own in term of appearance, but it holds a special place in your heart.
The gift is a bracelet, a thin gold chain gold with a small aventurine stone at its center. Beyond the fact that it is his stone, what's making this gift even more significant is that Aventurine has one as well. While you wear yours on your left, he wears his on his right wrist below his watch. He intented for the two of you to share matching bracelets you could wear daily and that was subtle enough only the two of you could really notice it through your other extravagant jewels. Since then, one glance at the aventurine bracelet on your wrist and your heart skips a beat ♡
─ ⊹ ⊱ Boothill ⊰ ⊹ ─
Every other day, Boothill finds himself mesmerized by the way you take care of your hair. Whether you brush it, braid it, decore it with accessories, he watches from afar with the softest glare. The one reserved for you, and you only.
Today is one of those where you've decided to use the cute ribbons you have recently purchased. Sitting confortably in front of your mirror, you feel Boothill's eyes on you as you display the cute accessories on the floor. "Which color do you think I should wear today ?" "Don't know, sugar. They'd all look fudgin' nice in your pretty hair" "That's very helpful thank you, baby". Boothill snickers, his attention splits between his gun he's been checking for a few mintues, and watch you clip a white and pink ribbon to the side of your head, securing a little braid. Fork, she looks so cute like this, he thinks to himself. Oblivious to your overheating cyborg boyfriend next to you, you finish your hairstyle and spin around with a "tadaaa !" only to find him dumbfounded and an adorable flush spreading on his cheeks. "Forkin' hell ! Got myself the prettiest gurl ain't I ?" Naturally, it ended with you pampering his face with kisses and he even lets you tie ribbons in his hair as well ♡
─ ⊹ ⊱ Sunday ⊰ ⊹ ─
Dearest Sunday was always a bit of a control freak, until he met you. Well he still is one but ever since you've become a couple, his controlling demeanour has somewhat softened. Your presence clearly helped him feel loved and needed, satisfying the yearn to be someone's special one. In the intimacy of your relationship, he has grown more laid-back, to the point of allowing you to touch his precious wings.
This has become one of your favorite ways to demonstrate your love, carefully and tenderly caressing his feathers. They're so delicate you often worry you'll hurt him, but it actually helps Sunday relax. "Do not worry, my angel. Think of it as a hug. It is warm and very comforting for me" he once reassured you. Afterwards, it became a routine for the two of you. Sunday coming home from an exhausting day, you helping him rest by gently stroking his pretty wings. You even make sure to rub the base, where the tiniest feathers are, and the contented sighs he releases reassure you that you’re doing a really good job ♡
─ ⊹ ⊱ Dr Ratio ⊰ ⊹ ─
Usually, when you look at Veritas, the words circulating in your mind are often along the lines of handsome, gorgeous, sexy, serious..... angry. However in the evening, it's different. Sitting in his favorite comfy chair, he pulls you onto his his lap and puts on his glasses to read. You're aware you should focus on your own book but those glasses perched on top of his nose are seriously distracting you. This time, your mind fills with nothing but cute cute cute cute cuuuute. Obviously, he feels your stare on him –of course he does– it's not like you're being subtle anyway. Still, he pretends to act oblivious until you're the one bringing it up.
As he turns a page of his book, you shift on his lap. "Come on. Say it." His tone is serious, yet playful. "You... Cute." You blurt out, immediatly covering your face to cover the prominent blush on your face. "Darling, have you lost your ability to form full sentences ?" His cocky smirk making your blush worsen, nuzzling your head on his neck to hide it. Smiling down at your pouting and flushed face, he returns his attention back to his book. Although you go back to reading as well, he knows you’re sneaking glances at him every so often ♡
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/!\ don't steal, translate or repost this and claim it as you own /!\
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casuallyanidiot · 22 hours ago
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I've been writing the yandere farmboy oneshot, and my head is full of delicious thoughts about him.
Tw. Yandere, nsfw themes, Fem.Pov
Yandere Farmboy who is the only one who cares about you in this tiny town. He's from a better off family and just knows he can take care of your properly if you'd let him.
Yandere Farmboy who loves having his hands all over you. His favorite is on the small of your back, guiding you gently to wherever he feels best. He likes manhandling you, too. There's something so satisfying about how his thick, strong fingers clamp down on your arm and drag you around with ease.
Yandere Farmboy who's liked you for years, but has been too afraid to act on it. You're not the kind of girl he'd really want to be seen with. You're poor, not well educated, come from a bad family. You're everything his community hates. You're supposed to be trash, but he loves you anyways.
Yandere Farmboy who acts way too familiar with you. He speaks like you're old friends with each other, or like he knows everything about you. When you do something he doesn't like or doesn't approve of, he comes from an angle of just caring about your wellbeing. It doesn't matter if he's trying to pressure you into doing things you don't want. He knows what's best. Why wouldn't you trust the town's golden boy when he's telling you that you should kiss him or let him take you out?
Yandere Farmboy who is in everyone's good graces. He makes you feel crazy for feeling scared or reluctant around him. Come on? You're really worried about him of all people darling? He treats you like some dumb, doe eyed animal that is in need of a guiding hand rather than an actual person who maybe just doesn't want to be with him.
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yuikomorii · 1 day ago
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Ayato: Idol AU Headcanons
// Since you guys enjoyed my DL K-pop AU posts, I decided to write some HCs about Ayato, because he was the most talked about. In this AU, the Sakamakis aren’t actual brothers, nor are they vampires; the group’s concept is just the one of a vampire family. Some details here are based on true things about Ayato but have been slightly tweaked to better fit the idol AU. Hope you enjoy! ❤️
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He was once a basketball player and even served as the captain of his team. His dedication to the sport often led him to compete in numerous tournaments, causing him to skip many classes.
Ayato was scouted for his visuals. The CEO of REJET LABELS noticed his youthful yet refined features while Ayato was casually walking home from high school.
A former classmate confirmed Ayato’s popularity at school. She also mentioned that people would randomly take pictures of him on the street, and a bunch of his photos are used on Pinterest for inspiration.
Even before starting his trainee period, Ayato was already quite good in both slow and freestyle dancing. After beginning his training, he discovered his rapping abilities.
As a trainee, the first person Ayato befriended was Laito, who remained his closest companion even after debuting. The two are often spotted hanging out together.
Ayato hates doing aegyo. However, during a special episode of the variety show MUKBROS, Kou dared him to sing and dance to a cute song. The performance went extremely viral, skyrocketing his popularity. Despite this success, Ayato has admitted that the experience still gives him PTSD.
Ayato is in high demand for brand deals and appears to be everywhere. Rumor has it he’s poised to become the next Chanel ambassador. Unfortunately, this has led some solo fans of other members to accuse him of favoritism, casting him in a negative light.
He is the first member of the SAKAMAKIS to appear in Vogue, where he was officially recognized as the "IT boy."
He was ranked 1st in top 100 most beautiful faces (male version); one of the reasons why he gained the “Visual God” title within the idol community.
His best known controversy involves plastic surgery. Netizens noticed changes in Ayato’s nose and jaw when comparing his pre-debut photos and videos to his current appearance. A bunch of Dialovers took his side, attributing the changes to puberty, yet others strongly disagreed, spreading hate by making posts about him looking “botched.”
Last year, he partnered with soloist Cardia as a MC. This experience had a mixed impact on Ayato’s image. While some criticized him for occasionally forgetting his lines or laughing and posing in front of the camera while Cardia consistently gave her all, others came to his defense. Many fans and non-fans argued that the criticism was too harsh, pointing out that Ayato was never intended to be the spokesperson of his group, but Reiji. They also emphasized that it was unfair to compare someone with no prior experience to someone used to give speeches.
When asked who he considers the best-looking person he knows, he confidently answered, while giggling, "myself." Shu then posed the same question but added a rule: he couldn’t choose himself again. In response, Ayato admitted that Cardia is a close second.
Despite this, the biggest dating rumor surrounding Ayato involved a possible relationship with the daughter of one of the staff members. Diapatch spotted Ayato with a blonde girl at a private event, and sasaengs later reported seeing them holding hands late at night. Whether they are actually dating remains unclear, but the rumors enraged many of Ayato’s solo stans. Some were so upset that they filmed themselves destroying his PCs and degrading the girl online.
The hate train quickly faded, especially after Ayato's successful solo debut. His fancams went viral, with his styling making him truly resemble a Vampire Prince. This reminded netizens of his iconic performance on MUKBROS, leaving them stunned by his duality. On top of that, his noticeable improvement silenced critics who had dismissed him as "just a visual."
When asked which idol he’d like to get to know better, he mentioned soloist KINO from the same company. A few months later, KINO invited him to his limited-edition web show, where they had the chance to interact, play games and even filmed a TikTok together afterward.
It’s rumored that not only REJET LABELS, but also other companies pressure idols into plastic surgery to resemble Ayato. This theory gained credibility when Zen from Un: Birthday Song looked different in middle school but began resembling Ayato after becoming a trainee, securing his debut spot in a reality competition.
People who have seen Ayato describe him as having an arrogant and bold presence on stage, perfectly fitting his vampire idol persona. However, off-stage, he’s known to be kind to his fans and happy to engage in casual conversations. Recently, a Dialover shared their experience meeting Ayato, saying, “In MVs and concerts he appears untouchable, but in real life, you realize he’s just a normal handsome boy.”
He is frequently described as the ideal type in street interviews, admired for his stunning looks, hardworking nature, and confident personality. Moreover, many trainees have cited him as their role model.
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ancientwastedlores · 2 days ago
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Homelander Only Breaks His Favorite Toys
I’m a Loki girl through and through, but a recent The Boys rewatch kinda got me obsessed with Homelander, so I thought I’d write a quick little angst fic based on the Somebody Else x My Boy Only Breaks His Favorite Toys” mashup (which I have been playing non-stop by the way. My boyfriend has accepted this new way of life.)
Huge thanks to @blindmagdalena for encouraging me to write this! 
I haven’t written fiction in a while, so I hope this is good! ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Homelander Only Breaks His Favorite Toys
Oh, here we go again. 
You put on a plastic smile while he holds your wrist in a death grip behind your back. 
The cameras flash incessantly, almost making your eyes water - whether that’s from the ache throbbing in your arms or the flashes, you can’t tell anymore. 
"Homelander! Are you going to cameo in A-Train’s multiverse movie!?"
"Homelander, is there a universe where you are A-Train!?" 
Homelander laughs, flashing his sharp pearly whites. He exudes charisma as he raises his hands to stop the line of questions. 
"I guess you’ll just have to catch the movie next week, boys!" 
He pulls you closer to him. "For now, the missus and I have to make it Vought for the premiere!" 
With a flourish, he flips his cape like the showman he is and then holds you as he launches, leaving the reporters in the dust. 
You feel your tears trail behind you as he whisks you to the penthouse. Normally, New York looks bejeweled from this incredible height. Tiny dots of lights up and down the massive steel and glass buildings. At this height, life is erased. Humans are erased. It’s tall shapes and big shadows, like an unfinished rendering of a video game. 
You’ve always loved flying, but you suspect you’re in for a hard time once your feet touch the marble floors in the penthouse.
------------------------------------------------------------- 
Homelander stayed silent for hours after getting home. You decided to bake him some banana bread - his favorite - and whip up a good old-fashioned chocolate milkshake. The scent of it usually makes him forget whatever he was angry about, but it doesn"t seem to be working right now. 
He paces the room, his rich red cape trailing behind him in the most dramatic way. Homelander has his theatric tendencies, and you have learned to indulge them. 
Even when the cost is high. 
"What’s wrong?" you ask despite your better judgment. 
"What could possibly be wrong? You’re the Jackie Kennedy to my John Kennedy. What could be wrong about that?" he snaps. 
"John…" 
"Why you?" he asks. "Why you and not me?" 
"Me BECAUSE of you, John; they wouldn’t care about me if I weren’t dating you!" 
He heaves, his eyes red without the aid of a laser. His chest rises and falls as his brain scrambles for a response. He is angry; no, he wants to be angry. He just wants something to rage about. 
He isn’t actually angry that the reporters swarmed the two of you and bombarded you with a hundred questions before paying attention to him. After all, the questions were about him. What’s he like as a boyfriend? What’s the cutest thing he’s done for you? Have you ever worn the cape? Would you ever be in a movie with him? 
No, there"s something else. You’ve given up trying to dig deep and find meaning in his outbursts because, more often than not, you get it wrong. Some obscure random thing might have happened 5 minutes or 5 years ago and he seethes about it before calming down. 
This is life now. 
"Are you actually mad at me?" you ask. "I won’t leave this penthouse if you don’t want me to." 
He laughs - a sarcastic, painful one. You’re all too used to this. 
Homelander looks you up and down as if scanning you. Assessing you. As if asking himself what you mean for his approval points and how you look on his arm. 
You are by no means perfect, but Homelander loved that about you. He never lied that you were the hottest one he’d been with or even the most intelligent. But he loved that you loved him. He loved that you forgave his outbursts and allowed him space to throw a tantrum or brood silently. 
He loved that you were patient with him, which is more than anybody had ever been with him. But he often tested that, too. 
"You know what, I think I'll do this premiere alone. I wouldn’t want you to feel out of place in such a big crowd." 
That stings. You’ve never been a showman or particularly extroverted, but you wanted to try. For him. And you thought you were getting pretty good at it, too. 
But you nod. There’s no use in arguing. 
Clearly, though, he isn’t done. "I mean, I know you hate putting yourself out there, and you end up a nervous wreck after these events. I don’t want to spend the night taking care of you." 
"Sure. I understand." 
Somehow, your neutral, bland response does not anger him. For some funny reason, it relieves him that he doesn't have to fight with you to get what he wants. 
He turns on his heel and exits the house without another word. 
------------------------------------------------------------- 
You exit the shower and spot the dress you were going to wear for the premiere. In typical Homelander fashion, he wanted you to match his colors rather than A-Train's colors. This was A-Train's night, but he'd be damned if you wore anyone else's aesthetic on your body. 
It’s a red-white-and-blue dress with a dramatic, asymmetrical neckline and fitted bodice with sparkling red and blue sequins transitioning into a voluminous, flowing skirt. Homelander picked it and got it tailored just for you. He knew the parts you were insecure about and made the designer alter the dress to ensure you felt your best. The poofy ball gown style skirt hid your ass, which you didn’t like the shape of. The neckline softened your broad shoulders, which you always felt made you look too masculine. But Homelander made sure the neckline didn’t hide your neck and collarbones, which you loved. 
You touch the rich satin fabric, your heart aching. You were so excited to show this dress off, hanging on to his arm as he flashed his charming, boyish smile. You consider wearing it, even if it's just to clean the kitchen, but decide against it. It would hurt too much. 
You put on a clean pair of sweats and potter to the kitchen. Pouring yourself a glass of wine, you decide to just watch the live broadcast of the premiere and make do with that. 
Three hours pass - you’re asleep on the couch at this point with the TV still running. The premiere ended, and now the channel is playing clips of all mentions of the multiverse in all the past movies. You’d watch if you weren"t so emotionally exhausted. 
A click of the front door wakes you, and through blurry eyesight, you see a smudge of red-and-blue enter. You prop yourself up and rub your eyes sleepily. 
"Hey." 
He sounds like he’s in a jolly mood. 
"Hey," you say back. "How was the premiere?"
"I missed you…" he says, voice dripping with sincerity. 
"I missed you too…" you bring your arms up as if inviting him to cuddle. 
You know he had a miserable time without you. He fucks things up for himself and comes back like a baby in need of consolation. 
Sure enough, he makes his way to the couch, where you’ve created a little nest of fluffy pillows and blankets, and practically falls onto you. You wrap your arms around him as tightly as you can while he buries his nose in your neck. 
"So. Is the movie every bit as terrible as you thought?" you ask, knowing he’s in the mood to shit-talk A-Train. 
"Worse," his voice comes muffled. "Terrible. Horrible. Garbage." 
You laugh and push him lightly so you can have an audible conversation. "Tell me about it." 
"It baffles me the bullshit Vought comes up with. So pointless and bland and unnecessary. And A-Train was eating it right up. Lapping up every last bit of praise like a fucking dog."
"A-Train looked lost in the spotlight. He cannot handle it like you do," you say. "Nobody does." 
A giddy smile crosses Homelander’s face. You pinch his cheeks lightly and then run your fingers through his perfect blonde hair. "Do you want to watch something half-decent and doze off on the couch?" you ask. 
"No… I want you to put that dress on so I can fly us to dinner."
You look at him, your heart twisting painfully in your chest. His boyish grin is disarming, softening your resolve just like it always does. You want to say no. You want to tell him you’re too tired, that the emotional whiplash of his moods has wrung you out like an old sponge. 
But you know that’s not what he wants to hear.
You force a smile instead. "Sure.”
You stand, your legs unsteady, as you head to the bedroom to slip on the dress. It feels heavier now than when you first tried it on. Maybe you’re tired. Maybe it’s just your mind playing tricks. 
You catch your reflection in the mirror. The dress is stunning—perfect, even. He had it made for you, tailored to his vision of you. But when you look at yourself, you see the hollow shell of the person you used to be. You see someone who bends and folds and breaks under the weight of his love.
You hear him calling from the living room, impatient. "You ready yet? You’re gonna knock 'em dead."
You close your eyes, gripping the edge of the dresser until your knuckles turn white. No, you cannot leave him. He needs you, and he doesn"t mean to be mean. He’s trying to make up for it, isn’t he? Stop being such a sensitive, emotional baby. Get the fuck out there and let him show you how sorry he is.
You enter the living room, the satin catching the light and making you look almost ethereal. Homelander is stunned by his own creation. 
"Gorgeous. Fucking perfect." 
You smile and do a little twirl, feeling like the most beautiful girl in the world. 
He rises from the couch, his cape draped dramatically over one shoulder, and strides toward you like a man who owns the world because he does. "You’re my queen. The only one who can keep up with me."
Yes, but do you want to? Or do you want to slow down a bit? Savor the small moments and not spend your life waiting for the next attack? 
You can do nothing but kiss him. He pulls you close by the waist and almost devours you in his frenzy. Waves of emotions crash over you, voices urging you to both switch off your brain and get far away from the broken man. 
How much more of this can you take? He will make it his mission to find out.
He pulls away and flashes his pearly whites. "Ready to lift off?" 
"Abso-fucking-lutely" you smile back. 
------------------------------------------------------------- 
The restaurant is one of the most exclusive in New York—floor-to-ceiling glass windows that overlook the city, tables spaced far apart to ensure privacy, and a waitstaff so attentive it’s almost suffocating. Homelander loves it here. Not because of the food, though it’s excellent, but because everyone here knows who he is. They don’t gawk or ask for autographs, but you can feel their reverence in every stolen glance, every hushed whisper. He thrives on it.
You sit across from him, the candlelight bouncing off the sequins of your dress. He's been in an unusually good mood since you arrived, and for a moment, you let yourself believe tonight might actually be different. He's been complimenting you all night, his eyes lingering on yours in a way that makes you feel like you're the only person in the world.
“See?” he says, leaning back in his chair with a self-satisfied grin. “I knew this dress was the one. Look at them.” He gestures subtly to the other diners, some of whom are clearly trying not to stare. “They’re jealous. You’re the most beautiful woman in the room.”
You smile faintly, murmuring a soft “thank you” as you sip your wine. It’s moments like this that make staying feel worth it. But then, as always, the warmth starts to curdle.
The turning point is subtle. It always is. He starts picking at his food, his jaw tightening ever so slightly. You can tell something’s shifted. You don’t know what triggered it this time—maybe it was the waiter who smiled a little too warmly at you or the couple at the next table who didn"t acknowledge him quickly enough.
“Do you think they’re staring at me or you?” he asks suddenly, his tone sharp enough to cut glass.
You blink, taken aback. “What?”
“I mean, they’re obviously looking at me,” he continues, his voice low and dangerous. “But you’re the one soaking it up, aren"t you? Sitting there like some fucking… princess.”
The words hit like a slap. “John, what are you talking about?”
He leans forward, his eyes narrowing. “You love this, don’t you? The attention. The glamour. The fucking dress. You think it’s all for you.”
“Of course, I don’t,” you say quietly, trying to keep your voice steady. “I came here because you wanted to. I’m here for you.”
“For me,” he repeats mockingly, his lips curling into a sneer. “That’s rich. You think I don’t see the way you look at them? Like you’re just waiting for someone better to come along. Someone who doesn"t scare you.”
“That"s not true,” you whisper, but your voice sounds hollow even to your own ears. You glance around nervously, hoping no one is listening. Of course, they are. Even if they can’t hear the words, they can feel the tension radiating off him like a live wire.
Somewhere, you blame yourself for enabling this behavior. Your timidness… your eagerness to please… your avoidance of conflict… it feeds him. If it were Starlight or Stormfront or anybody else, they would stand up to him and draw a boundary. And that’s what he needs - not a timid, sniveling fool who would bend over backward to play into his fantasies. 
He laughs bitterly, almost as if he agrees with your thoughts, and leans back in his chair. “You know what"s funny? You’re so scared of me, but you’re the real monster here. You just sit there, pretending to be this sweet, innocent thing, and you judge me for every little fucking thing I do or say.”
“I don’t judge you,” you protest weakly, your hands trembling in your lap. “I—”
“Save it,” he snaps, his voice rising just enough to make heads turn. “You’re just like everyone else. You love me when I’m the hero, but the second I let my guard down, you look at me like I’m some kind of freak.”
“John, please,” you beg, your voice barely above a whisper. “Can we not do this here?”
“Why not?” he says, his smile cold and cruel. “You embarrassed me at the premiere, didn’t you? Couldn’t even be bothered to show up. Do you know how pathetic that made me look?”
“I was just respecting what you asked of me. And I thought you said you missed me,” you say softly, tears stinging your eyes. 
“Yeah, well,” he says, waving a hand dismissively. “What do I know, right?.”
The rest of the dinner passes in a blur. He doesn"t apologize. He doesn"t even look at you. You pick at your food, your appetite long gone, and force yourself to smile when the waiter comes by to clear the plates. You feel like you’re suffocating, the weight of his words pressing down on your chest like a boulder.
When the bill comes, he doesn"t even glance at it. He tosses his card onto the table and leans back in his chair, looking more like a king about to call for an execution. 
“Ready to go?” he asks casually, as if nothing happened.
You nod, your face carefully blank. “Of course.”
------------------------------------------------------------- 
He flies you back to the penthouse in silence. The city lights blur beneath you, but you barely notice. Your mind is racing, your heart pounding. You know what you have to do. You’ve known for a while now, but tonight was the final straw.
When you land, he kisses your cheek and tells you he’s going to shower. “Don’t wait up,” he says with a wink, and then he disappears down the hall.
You wait until you hear the water running before you move. You slip out of the dress and back into your sweats, your hands trembling as you pack a small bag with just the essentials. You don’t know where you’re going yet—maybe a hotel, maybe a friend"s place—but you know you can’t stay here.
As you zip up the bag, you glance around the penthouse one last time. It feels empty, like a stage set after the actors have gone home. You think of all the times you convinced yourself this was enough. That he was enough. That you could fix him if you just loved him hard enough. And he would love once you fixed whatever was wrong with you. 
But you can’t. You know that now. He needs someone stronger. 
Braver. 
You leave the dress draped over the back of the couch, a silent goodbye. Then you slip out the door, the sound of the water still echoing in the distance.
For the first time in what feels like forever, you don’t look back.
------------------------------------------------------------- 
It happens on the fourth night. 
You"re staying at a hotel under an alias, the type of place he wouldn"t normally stoop to visiting. You"ve been trying to keep your head down, trying to breathe for the first time in what feels like years. But deep down, you knew it wouldn"t last.
When the knock comes at the door—sharp, insistent—you freeze. Your heart hammers in your chest. You don’t have to check; you already know it’s him. You’ve been bracing for this moment since the night you left. And honestly, he took longer than you expected. 
Still, when you open the door and see him standing there, you’re not prepared. He looks almost unhinged, his hair slightly mussed, his eyes blazing with something between fury and heartbreak. His red cape is gone, but the suit clings to him like a second skin. 
“I found you,” he says, his voice soft, almost tender, but there’s a dangerous edge underneath it. “Of course I did.”
You step back instinctively, your hands gripping the edge of the door. “How did you—”
“Don’t.” He pushes the door open with ease, stepping inside like he owns the place. “Don’t ask me stupid questions. You really thought you could hide from me? Me?” He laughs, but there’s no humor in it. “Come on, sweetheart. Give me more credit than that.”
“John…” you start, but he cuts you off, pacing the room like a caged animal.
“You left,” he says, his voice rising. “You just walked out. No note, no call, nothing. Do you know what that did to me? Do you have any idea?”
Your chest tightens. “I needed to.”
“Bullshit.” He spins to face you, his expression twisting with anger. “You didn"t need to do anything. You chose this. You chose to hurt me. After I rescued you from a pitiful existence and made something of you. Little Y/N wanted to be a writer but had no time. I rescued you from your shabby little apartment and gave you everything. Time. Money. Luxury. And this is what I get.” 
“I wasn’t trying to hurt you,” you say quietly, but your words only seem to inflame him further.
“No?” He stalks closer, his voice dripping with venom. “Then what do you call this? Running off in the middle of the night like a fucking coward? Hiding in some fucking run-down rat-shit hotel like you’re afraid of me?”
“I AM afraid of you,” you admit, the words tumbling out before you can stop them. His face freezes, a flicker of something almost like pain crossing his features before the anger returns.
“You’re afraid of me?” he repeats, his tone incredulous. “I’ve protected you. I’ve given you everything. Everything you asked and didn’t ask for. You sound so fucking ungrateful. I loved you.” 
The words hit like a slap. You take a step back, shaking your head. “That's not love, John. That's control.”
“Don’t,” he snarls, his voice trembling with fury. “Don’t you fucking psychoanalyze me right now. I loved you. I still love you. And you—” he can’t stop his maniacal laughter. He wags his finger at you. “You!” 
Tears well in your eyes, but you refuse to let them fall. “I just think this isn’t meant to be.”
“Oh, you’re a fortune teller now?”
“John…” 
“Such a fucking saint, aren't you, saving us all from unhappiness. Or…” he smiles. A dangerous smile. “There’s someone else!”
The question knocks the breath out of you. “What?”
“You heard me,” he says, his voice low and deadly. “There’s someone else, isn’t there? Is that why you left? Did you find someone who makes you feel all warm and fuzzy inside? Someone who doesn"t scare you?”
“No,” you say, your voice breaking. “There’s no one else.”
“Then why?” he demands, his voice rising again. “Why did you leave me? Why did you—”
“Because it’s not love!” you scream. The first real, raw emotion you allow yourself to feel in forever. 
Homelander almost looks proud of you for it. 
“You keep being cruel to me. You keep saying horrible things, and I get it; I'm not intelligent or gorgeous or fucking V'd up like your other girlfriends, but GOD. Why are you with me if you hate me so much?” 
For the first time, you see Homelander shocked. “What? I don’t… I don’t hate you; what the fuck are you talking about?” 
You laugh in resignation and wipe your tears with the neck of your sweater. “Homelander, I’m not the one for you. I’m done.”
“You’re done? YOU are leaving ME?” 
He stares at you, his chest heaving, his hands clenched into fists at his sides. For a moment, neither of you speak. The silence is deafening. He’s confused that you think he hates you and cannot fathom why you would believe that. He gave you everything. In what universe is that hate? 
“I gave you everything,” he says, more to convince himself now, his voice raw. “I’m the best thing that ever happened to you.”
“I’m sorry,” you say again. Part of you wants to desperately say you want to be back together when things are better. When you are stronger, and he is kinder. You want to believe that once you fix you, he will miss you. He will return and be so much nicer. Softer. 
But you know that time may never come. 
Just at this moment, Homelander wishes his powers had allowed him to read minds, too. Your face inscrutable, he has nothing to latch on to. He looks at you like you’ve just plunged a knife into his chest. For a moment, you think he might lash out, that he might destroy the entire block in a fit of rage. 
But instead, he takes a step back, his expression crumbling.
“You’ll regret this,” he says, his voice barely above a whisper. “You’ll miss me. You’ll see.”
You nod, tears streaming down your face. “Maybe I will.”
He stands there for a moment longer, his fists clenching and unclenching, his jaw tight. Then, without another word, he turns and leaves, the door slamming shut behind him.
You collapse onto the bed, your entire body shaking. The weight of the confrontation crashes over you. Hot tears finally gush out as you clutch your pillow and sob quietly, knowing Homelander can still hear you. 
This isn’t over. Not yet. He will forever stalk the edges of your life, watching. Waiting for you to need him. 
You know Homelander well enough to know he doesn't let go of his toys without a fight.
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109 notes · View notes
alllgator-blood · 1 day ago
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I love the way you write the Bishop's as family. It's extremely messy and raw and so different from the interpretations I've seen. It's genuinely a breath of fresh air. That said, I feel like we've gotten a sense of how most of the Bishops have adapted (or not adapted) to their injuries following the Schism, but what about Heket? She's doing her best to lead and hold things together, but she got hit pretty hard herself didn't she?
AHHH THIS IS MY FAVORITE THING TO HEAR!!! THANK YOU, I live for the bishops' tragic sibling dynamic!! I've done comics my whole life but never got a chance to write for siblings despite how important my own little sister is to me, so this game being my hyperfixation is a breath of fresh air for me as well
I actually have an oldddd comic about heket dealing with her post-schism injuries! The full one will probably never get posted/completed for several reasons, but it was basically like "heket had chronic pain even before the schism, and was so used to working while in pain that when she was cut in half, she just kept working until she desperately needed medical intervention. Kallamar finds a bunch of other stuff wrong with her that nobody knew about" and then this scene happens:
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Even if it might end up not being this comic, I really want to make something that touches on how traumatic it is to live with something that's actively trying to kill you from the inside out (even for someone as tough as heket). And also how differently everybody sees you when they find out about it. I have a lot to say about this kind of thing and I feel like this topic gets slept on even if the bishops are inseparable from their disabilities in-game, so I intend to remedy that when I'm able to :')
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lupinqs · 2 days ago
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hi hi hi!!!!!!! with the end of take me to church right around the corner, i want y’all to vote on which upcoming series you’d like to see first. imma be honest my favorite is the second one but i have so much lore for all of them that it would be easy for me to write any!!! vote pls!!!!
WNBA Paige x Upper East Side Princess OC:
paige plays for the liberty; she’s in her rookie season
oc is in her last year of college at columbia—her parents are very rich (like billionaire type rich) and she’s grown up on the upper east side
enemies to lovers hella because oc is a bitch lowkey and paige def matches that energy towards oc
despite being so young, oc also already has a fiancé that she’s kinda been expected to end up with her whole life because he’s a family friend and the son of another rich millionaire/billionaire but they’re more just friends if anything
oc’s finacé’s parents are huge funders towards NY sports (including the liberty) which is kinda why oc and paige see each other a lot
oc’s parents def don’t approve so angst there too
oc is also an ex basketball player who was forced out of the sport at a young age despite being talented and paige kinda helps her get back into the sport and start loving it again because at the beginning oc HATES basketball
very reminiscent of gossip girl
UCONN Paige x Teammate OC:
paige is in her junior year, oc a freshman (only a year and a half age gap yall don’t be weird)
oc was the number-one recruit in her class coming into college just like paige was so she’s got a lotta pressure on her
paige and oc are roommates
oc tore her ACL her junior year of high school so when paige tears her, oc is there for her because she’s been in that position before—paige and oc have had a lot of similar experiences which makes them really understand each other
paige really channels her inner coach p into oc because oc is gonna have to have a huge role in this season due to paige’s absence and then even more so with azzi’s injury
oc also has had a bf for like ever and i’m saying she’s been in love with this boy since she was a kid because they lived next door to each other—that type of thing. so oc has never even really thought about being gay or liking girls because she’s always been so infatuated with that boy but when she and him start having problems because he’s at a different college and when paige starts comforting her through that and she and paige start spending more time with each other, oc starts… realizing lots of things about herself and her feelings
lots of self-discovery
end goal is for paige to basically coach and encourage oc and team to a natty
WNBA Paige x Ex-Bestfriend Actress OC:
paige plays for the sparks; she’s in her rookie year
oc is a well-known and successful actress
paige and oc were childhood best friends (yes ik i just did this with tmtc) and had a hella homoerotic friendship that ends up falling apart paige’s first year of college after …. certain events
oc is more open about her sexuality but paige has always been very overthinking about it and has severe internalized homophobia which helps lead to the crumbling of their friendship before
oc has been really really successful these past few years in the acting industry; her first movie came out in paige’s sophomore year of college which was sort of a wake up call for her then because she hadn’t even known that her best friend was actually legit in acting now
paige’s junior year college is when she realizes that yeah, she is gay and she was in love with oc basically her whole childhood but she’s ruined it and she doesn’t even think she has a chance anymore
paige is completely chill and confident within herself and her sexuality by her senior year of college
anyways in the present oc and paige meet again at some after party in la and it’s so weird for paige because oc seems so confident and at ease and she’s with all these famous people now but she used to be so shy and reserved
cameron brink and oc’s best friend are good friends and since paige and oc’s closest friends in la are good friends, they start running into each other a lot more
lots of angst fs and learning the new versions of each other vs remembering the ones they grew up with
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myanmardoesnotexist · 1 day ago
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Analysis of Why Valentino Cares So Much
So, I know I write a lot of fanfiction, but perhaps my favorite thing about Rosquez is the psychology of Valentino, specifically his bizarre fascination with Marc (This is outside of shipping goggles btw). As the years go on, this fixation with one specific rivalry has become increasingly more clear, and I kind of just wanted to dive into why I believe Valentino Rossi cares so much.
To me, it comes down to two things:
#1: Marc was the first to really win (in Valentino's eyes)
With Stoner, Lorenzo, and Sete it was a rivalry for sure, and there was anger, but Valentino seemed to view it as sort of a game he could control. And he did control it, he came out the victor both to the public and on track. When they eventually got over their rivalries years later, it was Valentino being a 'benevolent king' with the vibe of sparing his enemy. Even if they beat him in the championship, ultimately Valentino won the game of relevance and importance in MotoGP. With Marc it was slightly different. Valentino got the entire racing world to turn against Marc (in a way he never had before with other rivals), and yet somehow it didn’t work. Marc kept on winning, he brushed off the hate, and he’s well on his way to matching Valentino is championships next year. Even if Marc's reputation never recovered, even if we know that Marc was very hurt by this, none of it matters because he is the more relevant one now. Marc is still riding, is on the currently best team (a team that Valentino failed to bring a championship to) and each year more and more people view him in a better light.
On top of that, Marc's name is up there with Valentino's as one of the legends in MotoGP history. Stoner, Sete, and Lorenzo are all brilliant drivers and some of the greats, but that top list is Agostini, Doohan, Rossi, and Marquez. Valentino is arguably still more legendary than Marc, but he will never be able to escape from the younger man. Their names are up there together forever, and to Valentino that is a first with a rival. He cannot look at any of it and say that he won, so it must mean he lost.
#2 Marc was the first to actually hurt him personally.
With Marc he clearly felt in some way personally betrayed. He liked Marc, this is almost undeniable. He was proud of him, he cheered him on, they hung out, honestly Marc was almost an unofficial VR46 student with the way their relationship was in those early days. Yes, Marc represented a passing of the torch, but Valentino almost seemed okay with it at that point. Until he became competitive again and found out that Marc doesn't just look up to him or admire him, but wants to beat him, point blank, and will ride on the limit to do that. This came in 2014, but honestly I don't think is was as prominent because Marc had such a dominant season it was hardly a real fight. 2015 though, it was Valentino really fighting for the title. And he probably expected Marc to bend the knee, to be on his side. Maybe not help him, but not impede him in any way. But they had their friction throughout the year, and the fact that Marc was racing him just as hard as he races everyone else got into Valentino's head. Because Marc was supposed to be on his side. So if he's not, he must be against Valentino and for Jorge Lorenzo. There is no in between.
So he lashed out, he let paranoia hit him, and yet somehow he still didn't get satisfaction. Because even though he did his best to hurt Marc, the other man barely seemed to flinch (which we all know isn't true, but to Valentino I think it is). And that would be particularly rough, because it would mean Marc didn't care. That all of that friendship was one-sided on Valentino's part, that he was the one used, which to someone like him, who always has control, would be new and very very uncomfortable. And so he created this narrative that Marc never liked him, Marc never looked up to him, everything was a lie and a manipulation, and he is a villain with no heart. Because I think to Valentino it is impossible to even act like he doesn't still care. So if Marc can do that, it must mean all of it was fake.
To me these two reasons are why Valentino can't seem to let go of this one particular rivalry, and seems so viciously angry about it ten years after the biggest incident happened. His crazy brain fascinates me, and even if you look at it through a purely platonic, non-shipper lens, its one of the most interesting relationships in MotoGP.
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sad-girl-hours23 · 2 days ago
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Just some musings on domestic bucktommy (from when I was writing my drabble series)
Dating a fellow first responder means their schedules often don’t align for weeks. Sometimes this requires ignoring other responsibilities so they can steal some time together. More often, it takes meticulous planning (Buck’s specialty) and inviting each other into the mundanity of their lives.
They’ve only got about twenty-four hours together, and they’ll be sleeping through most of them, so Buck lets himself into Tommy’s with the key he gave him six months into their relationship. He puts a load of dirty clothes in the washer; smiles when he finds an LAFD shirt with Buckley on the back, looking more stretched out than the last time he’d worn it. Laundry started, Buck starts on dinner, Bobby’s lasagna.
Buck’s mentally checking items off his list, these domestic moments becoming a welcome routine.
Tommy gets home; they eat, talk about their days, then go to bed.
Buck has taken over as big spoon tonight, his arm wrapped around Tommy’s middle. Tommy’s breathing evens out as Buck goes over the plan for the next day: Buck will let Tommy sleep in while he goes for his morning run (his heart stutters when he thinks of how something as simple as having a favorite route at Tommy’s place makes him feel so settled); then he’ll start brewing coffee before his shower, Tommy will be waking up then (sometimes he’ll join Buck, Buck calculates for this now so it doesn’t push back their schedule); they’ll eat at their favorite breakfast place around the corner so they don’t have to worry about dishes and Tommy’s fridge is looking a little bare as it is, and Buck will probably never be over showing off his boyfriend; then they’ll stop at one of their favorite bookstores, The Ripped Bodice. It’s always best for Buck to be a) chaperoned and b) on a time limit, when it comes to bookstores. Tommy will adhere to the one book limit, but Buck will walk out with at least three (he hasn’t been there in months, okay?); then they’ll stop at the hardware store, get the supplies they need for the little garden Tommy’s been planning for months. Next is the main event, the grocery store. They’ll argue over the semantics of necessities, and Tommy will still buy Buck’s top three favorite cereals anyway, and all of Jee’s favorite snacks are necessary actually, Evan. Buck will feel incredibly fond and a little like he’s getting away with something, because how is he allowed to have this? Then, they’ll make a quick-ish stop at Tommy’s favorite plant nursery, the reminder that they have groceries waiting for them in the truck, the only thing stopping Tommy from spending the rest of daylight there.
They’ll get home, put away their groceries, and Tommy will make them lunch, and they’ll eat on the backyard patio. Then Buck will start on his pile of books as Tommy changes the oil in his truck, then Buck’s jeep. Buck has no problem doing it himself, but Tommy loves doing things for him (especially when it’s something Buck could easily do himself and who is Buck to deny him that?)
Buck’s half asleep, half awake now as he cuddles impossibly closer to Tommy, savoring this moment while eager for tomorrow and all the domestic Saturdays he can get.
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ryin-silverfish · 2 days ago
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Sorry for the very late reply: I stayed off Tumblr for like, a month or so. But this is a long reblog with a lot of interesting points I wanna respond to.
Honestly, the most common form of JCT doesn't stem from A Chinese Odyssey. It's inspired by the webnovel that's kinda a fanfiction to said movie, Biography of Wukong.
The predecessor to BMW, Asura Online, takes a lot more inspiration from the webnovel than its spiritual successor, and even tho BMW isn't trying to be a direct continuation of AO, I would argue that some of its themes and worldbuilding still slipped into BMW.
You mentioned not seeing JCT in the game according to my definition, and I feel like it's a matter of exposure. For someone who has Chinese as their first language, they are gonna to be 1) exposed to a shit ton of JTTW media, and 2) see a lot of interpretation about the novel proliferate that an English audience is completely unaware of.
BMW is not the most extreme or common form of JCT, but the general ideas are still recognizable. Like, just because it doesn't make all the gods evil, or all the yaoguais innocent victims, doesn't change the fact that the main narrative is still one of Oppressive, Conspiring Pantheon vs. Oppressed Yaoguais.
(Example: the lore entries' implication about Lingji and the Yellow Wind storyline is that Lingji is creating the weird stone Buddha heads and the Fuban yaoguai to 1) collect Lingyun, the "soul" equivalent, and 2) artificially create a threat so that he can rescue the Flowing Sands kingdom from it and convert them to Buddhism.)
(Instead, the Yellow Wind Demon became the rescuer and the kingdom started worshipping rats, which was why its people were all turned into rats.)
(Or, the most obvious one: the Western Heaven's genocide of the Yakshas in the Bull King family backstory.)
(As for Erlang: why do you think you find him inside a painting, which, according to the lore entries, is implied to be the result of him asking Maitreya for refuge from the Celestial Realm?)
And it's made even more jarring by the fact that the game wants to create a facsimile of the original novel through quoting its poetry and imitating the vernacular novel dialogue style, and make allusions to SWK's role as the Mind Monkey, without realizing how it conflicts with the Biography of Wukong-style interpretation.
You mention the lore entries, and that's actually my favorite part! Both the Ming-print style illustrations, and their simulation of the Zhiguai short story style.
But, again, there is a dissonance. The funny and strange Zhiguai-style entries are noticeably different in tone compared to the "main storyline" entries about major characters and backgrounds, which is written like modern short stories instead of a classical Chinese text translated into Mandarin.
And my problem is not that the adaptation is different, that it may want to change the allegory or reinterpret the themes for a modern audience.
It's the feeling that they want to have it both ways——be faithful to the novel (or at least create a facsimile of faithfulness), yet also stick to the Bio of Wukong style popular reading that proliferates in modern JTTW media for mass appeal.
And to me, the dissonance in the two narratives weakened the thematic coherence. Frankly, if it sticks to one or the other, I wouldn't have been writing these critiques: if it's a proper exploration of the original novel's allegorical themes, I'd be praising and loving it, and if it's JCT thorough and thorough, I'm just going to be like "Yeah, not for me" and leave it at that.
But it's this mixture of things I love and things that frustrate me that drives me to write and get down to the bottom of those conflicting feelings, which has little to do with JTTWR's original posts and his attitude towards adaptations.
Lastly: I'm very much coming from the perspective of a native speaker complaining about Chinese JTTW media and popular interpretations. My own opinions are not mainstream in the Chinese JTTW fandom either——JCT is so popular precisely bc it has mass appeal.
Just a thing to keep in mind.
I'm a Theravada Buddhist. I saw many people interpreting the story and meaning behind Black Myth Wukong, differently. But I hope the devs team didn't intend to insult Buddha Dhamma by recreating this new story and distort the meaning of Buddhahood or Enlightenment itself..
I don't know if they intended to insult Buddhism, but I can say that their presentation of Buddhism in the game is disrespectful.
@ryin-silverfish recently posted a wonderful essay on what's known as the "JTTW Conspiracy Theory," which is a method of interpreting the story by twisting details, making the heavenly hierarchy look evil. The game follows this method. I recommend that you read the essay:
I unknowingly ran into the JTTW Conspiracy Theory a couple of years ago. A Chinese article claimed that the Buddha lies in the novel. This is my rebuttal.
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carolperkinsexgirlfriend · 7 hours ago
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can you see the stars in your dreams (and do they have a lot to say about me) - Letters
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First letter from Steve, never sent:
Your hair is pretty. Do you use conditioner?   ❤ your secret admirer
First letter from Steve, actually delivered:
       Eddie –        I wish I could say this to your face, but I’ve never been good with words, and you’d probably think it was a joke.        I can’t even get myself to talk to you, you’re so distracting.        I like how pretty your hair is. How do you get your curls so shiny? I want to run my fingers through them.        I hope this note brightens up your day. You deserve all the smiles you can get.        Yours,        Your Secret Admirer
Second Letter from Steve:
  Eddie –   You always look so happy when you’re with your friends. I like the way your dimples always seem to peek out no matter how small your smile is. The big ones are my favorite, when you’re jumping up on the cafeteria table with all your teeth showing.   You didn’t jump up on any tables last week. Was that because of me?   You seemed upset after I gave you my letter. Do you even want me to write these? I don’t want to be a bother. If you do, maybe you could write back? Leave your reply in the back of the WXYZ encyclopedia, no one ever uses that one.   If you don’t reply, then I won’t bother you anymore, okay?   Yours, always,   Your Secret Admirer
Eddie’s First Response:
       Secret Admirer,        I don’t know if this is a prank or if you genuinely like me, so I’m not really sure what to say. No one’s ever had a crush on me before, at least that I know of.          I didn’t know my hair was nice. My uncle keeps trying to get me to cut it. One time I brushed it and it was so poofy I wore a bandanna until I washed it again. But you probably didn’t need to know that. I’m glad you like it though.        The paper you picked is really pretty, and I can smell the perfume you sprayed on the envelope. Fresh flowers in the spring, or a sunny day.        –Eddie        P.S. You can keep writing. Your notes have been the best part of my days, and I hope mine will be for you, too.
Steve’s Response: 
       Eddie –         I’m not trying to bully you. I do actually really like you, and I wish I was brave enough to tell you. Brave like you. It doesn’t seem like you’re afraid of anything.        It’s ok if you don’t know how to respond, I’m just glad you did at all. I read it at least ten times and keep it in my nightstand drawer.        Sorry, that might be too much.        Yours, Always,        Your Secret Admirer        P.S. You’re always the best part of my day. I’m just glad I can read it at all. I’ve seen your penmanship, and I was a little worried. :)
Eddie’s Response: 
         Secret Admirer,          Oh, how your words wound me! My penmanship is immaculate, I’ll have you know. But it doesn’t seem fair that you know enough about me to recognize my handwriting, and I can’t say the same.          I understand if you don’t want to tell me your name, but what do you like to do for fun? What’s your favorite color? What do you dream about?          Can you give me anything? You call me brave but sending me these letters is the bravest thing I can think of, and every day I get one of your letters is the best day I’ve ever had.          Sincerely,          Eddie          P.S. I hope I dream of you tonight.
Steve’s Response:
  Eddie —   I know you don’t like them, but I like sports. There’s something about depending on your body to get you through a hard work-out, you know? But, I don’t know if it’s my thing, like Dungeons and Dragons and music are yours. Maybe I don’t have a thing. Is that weird?   My favorite color is yellow, like the sun, and sunflowers, and all those happy, bright colors. I’d love to see you in such a bright color one day, even if I do love all the black and red. It suits you.   I’ve never dreamt much, but when they’re good, they’re usually about you, so your hopes just might come true.   I know your handwriting, and what you yell about for the world to hear, but I don’t know as much as I’d like. I want to know everything about you. What’s your favorite color? Do you have happy dreams?   Yours, Always   Your Secret Admirer   P.S. Maybe put it in Romeo and Juliet this time, the edition with the tear in the cover.
Eddie’s Response: 
       Secret Admirer,        I want to learn everything about you– the color of your eyes, how your lips curve when you smile, how soft your hands are, the sound of your laughter. But more than that, I want to know what you love, along with all of your deepest wants and needs. You’ve piqued my curiosity with your scant answers. I can’t help but want more.        Unfortunately, there’s not enough room on the page for the unrelenting number of questions flooding my mind. I know the point of being a secret admirer is that it’s a secret, but I hope that if you really do like me, you won’t stay secret for long.        I came up with a game I think could be fun! I’ve filled mine out already, for you to keep. Recopy it onto a separate sheet and return it with your next note. That way I get to keep your answers and you can have mine. I also wrote little notes on the back for some of them. I couldn’t help myself.        Yours,        Eddie
And included in the envelope written on a notecard, with Eddie's answers circled in red:
      ||Rock or Pop 1 || Board Games or Sports Games 2 || Early Bird or Night Owl || Reading Or TV || Big Spoon or Little Spoon 3 || Outer Space or The Ocean 4 || Art or History || Alcohol or Weed 5 || Cats or Dogs || Holding Hands or First Kiss 6 || Winter or Summer || Grease or Star Wars || Gold or Silver || Halloween or New Year’s Eve || Vampires or Werewolves 7 || Drive-In or Movie Theater || Back Seat or Under the Bleachers 8 || Cuddling or Dancing || Slides or Swings 9 ||
On the back of the notecard:
       1. Pop is fun if you’re into that, but nothing beats a good guitar riff.        2. I know you’re into sports, sweetheart, but come on, board games are the obvious winner.        3. If you prefer being the big spoon, I’m willing to compromise <3        4. If you pick the ocean, then you’re braver than me! That’s a body of water you can’t even see the bottom of! How are you cool with that?        5. If you know me, and it really seems like you do, then my answer here is obvious.        6. I bet you’ve got really nice hands, sweetheart. Would love to feel them in mine someday.        7. Werewolves are cool, too, but come on, vampires fit my aesthetic way better.        8. Under the bleachers would probably be cool, too, but my van’s a lot warmer (does that count as a backseat?)        9. I was always that kid who would go down the slide and pretend there was a dragon chasing me, what about you?
Steve’s Response:
       Eddie —        I don’t love like you do, not so easily and with my whole heart. But I love my best friend, and I like a whole lot more—hopefully that’s enough.        I’m just as greedy for answers as you are. I want to write all your answers down on flash cards, study them like you might test me on them. If you do, I’m determined to get an A+.        I hope my own answers satisfy, even if they don’t include my face, my smile, or my name. But my eyes? They’re brown, but nowhere near as pretty as yours. I could fall into your eyes and die happy.        Yours, Always,        Your Secret Admirer        P.S. This time, put your reply in The Anatomy and Physiology textbook, right next to the diagram of the human heart.
Eddie’s Response:
       Secret Admirer,        You’re enough, just the way you are, brown eyes and all. I bet they’re real pretty. I could look into them for hours, mesmerized by every color differentiation, spend days counting every one of your eye lashes.        Just say the word—I’ll pick you up in my van and we can go to the drive-in and hold hands the whole time. I’ll wear my silver jewelry, and you can wear gold. I bet your hands would look real pretty wrapped up in mine.        I’ll be a gentleman, sweetheart, I swear.        Only the best for you.        Yours,        Eddie        P.S. Romantic meeting spot. I can’t wait to put this note right next to your heart. Next time maybe I can put my letter in Moby Dick. After all, you’re my white whale, baby, I’m always looking for you.
Steve’s Response: 
       Eddie —        Maybe someday, we’ll get to go to that movie. When we do, you don’t have to be a gentleman at all—I’m easy, if it’s for you, and it would be such a waste not to make use of all that space in your van.        I don’t have any rings, but if I did, I think I’d want one of yours. That way, whenever I look down at them, I’d be reminded of you.        How was your day? All I want to do is ask and hear your reply.        Yours, always        Your Secret Admirer        P.S. I’ll search the seas for you.
Eddie’s Response:
       Secret Admirer,        Oh, a flirty one, aren’t you? I like it. But maybe I’m shy, did you ever think about that? Maybe I want to walk you to your door, slide one of my rings on your finger, and give you a little kiss. You can pick the ring, baby—I’ll even resize it to fit you just right.        My days are always brighter when I hear from you. I go to the quarry on Wednesday’s to peddle my wares, but all I want to do is go home and play my guitar (my sweetheart). I’m writing a new song and I really want to get it down by next week’s practice, but I’m stuck on a riff I just can’t get right.        Do you play any instruments?        Sincerely,        Eddie        P.S. You’re going to make me swoon, babygirl.
Steve’s Response:
       Eddie —        My mom made me take piano lessons when I was little, but my dad refused to keep paying for them. I didn’t want to at first, but I really liked it. Maybe I’ll brush up my skills so I can play a song for you. Any requests?        Does your band play anywhere? I remember you from the middle school talent show, are you still going by Corroded Coffin? I bet you look hot when you play—I want to see it, someday. Your rings would glint under show lights, hypnotizing the entire audience. Especially me.        Did you figure out your riff? I’m waiting with bated breath.        Sincerely,        Your Secret Admirer        P.S. leave this one in The Taming of the Shrew.
Eddie’s Response:
       Secret Admirer,        Have you read this play? It’s not the romantic story you think it is. Since you’re already holding the book, why not check it out? I promise not to look at the checkout card to figure out who you are (I say, unrepentantly lying).        My band actually just got our first gig at the Hideout. It’s next Tuesday, and you should come! I would love to see you in the audience, cheering me on. I’ve been trying to respect your boundaries, but darling, I want to see you. Will you come? Please?        Thinking of you, always,        Eddie
Steve’s Response:
  Eddie —   There’s nothing more I want than to see you up on that stage, rocking out, in your element, but I’m just not ready. I hope you’ll forgive me.   Yours,   Your Secret Admirer   P.S. If you still want to respond, I’ll look in the big print edition of The Hobbit.
Eddie’s Response:
  Darling,   If you’re not ready, that’s okay. But the heart wants what it wants, and you can’t blame me for trying, can you? Even still, I’ll be singing just for you.   Of course I still want your letters, never doubt that. They’re still, always, forever, the best part of my day.   Always,   Eddie   P.S. Excellent choice in hiding places, have you read it?
Steve’s Response:
       Eddie —        How did your show go? I bet you’ve got a couple groupies already, you’ve already got the look for it. Did you figure out the riff for the song you were working on?        I tried playing the piano again, and I’m a little rusty, but it’s like riding a bike, you know? (Do you know how to ride a bike?) It’s nice, playing music, even if it’s all songs someone else has written, and they’re still not coming out right.        I’m sorry it’s been so long since my last letter. I just didn’t know what to say. You’re so patient, and nice, and I got caught up in my head you know? But I missed you.        I slept with your letter beneath my pillow last night, hoping for dreams of you.        Yours, Always        Your Secret Admirer        P.S. I haven’t read it, but maybe I will. Just to keep with the theme, put this letter in The Lord of the Rings.
Eddie’s Response: 
         Secret Admirer,          There was a little hiccup with my guitar and plugging her in, but otherwise it went great! All four of the drunks at the Hideout clapped politely when we were done, and not even one of them booed us off stage!          The riff is still getting on my last nerve, darling, you have no idea. I wish I could hear you play, I bet you’d inspire me so much, a stroke of genius would strike me and I’d know exactly what I’m missing.          (I don’t know how to ride a bike. My dad was never around to teach me, and by the time I moved in with Uncle Wayne, I was too old to learn.)          Darling, did you dream of me? Was it a naughty dream?          Yours,          Eddie P.S. The Lord of the Rings is the name of the whole trilogy, so I hope you find it in The Fellowship. Can’t believe you don’t even know Tolkein. It’s okay, baby, I like you anyway. 
Steve’s Response, first letter written alone:
  Eddie —   You were the best damn thing those drunks have ever seen, hands down. No, before you ask, I wasn’t there. But when I had that letter under my pillow, I dreamed a little dream (not naughty, I know you’re disappointed, sorry). I don’t remember the songs, but I remember the way you looked for me in the crowd and smiled. All the dream people gave you a standing ovation, me loudest of all.   You’re never too old to learn to ride a bike. My dad didn’t teach me either, but a friend did. Maybe someday, I could be that friend for you, and when I tell you I won’t let go, you can rest easy knowing I’m not lying.   Sincerely,   Your Secret Admirer   P.S. I know it’s still winter, but I’ll meet you in A Midsummer Night’s Dream.
Eddie’s Response:
  Secret Admirer,   I wish I could dream about you, too. I want to know your face well enough to hold it in my mind, even unconscious. I want to lay my head on my pillow tonight and know that you’ll be waiting for me in dreamland, ready to be the best groupie a guy could ask for.   The truth is, no one’s loved me before. No one’s liked me, or kissed me, or held my hand during a scary movie. And, that’s scarier than any movie could ever be. Because, you’re it, baby. The one and only, and all that shit.   I’ve got friends, and that’s enough for me! It really is! But a part of me just wants to hold someone’s hand—your hand. Maybe we can someday. Maybe we can do all the things we’ve talked about: go to a drive-in, play music together, learn to ride a bike. But even if we never do, I’m grateful for every one of these letters. Being wanted is new to me, and I’m not ready to give it up.   Yours, always,   Eddie
Steve’s halted attempts at letter-writing, never sent:
Eddie —   You don’t want to know what I   Someone has loved you. I love   I’ll take anything you   Fuck
Steve’s Response:
  Eddie —   I really liked your tabletop speech this week, even though you made fun of the jocks. Some of them definitely deserve it. Do you hate all of them, or just the bullies?   You laughed, but it wasn’t your real laugh like when Mr. Danver accidentally said ‘orgasm’ instead of ‘organism’. I love your laugh, I thought about it all day. Kind of like when your favorite song gets stuck in your head.   I know I’ve said it before, but I do really like you. But, if you knew me, I don’t think you’d like me. It’s okay, though. I’m stupid like that—always putting my whole heart into people who don’t feel the same.   I’m sorry, this is probably not the letter you hoped to get. I’ll be better next time, promise.   Yours,   Your Secret Admirer   P.S. Put your response in the World Atlas, the long one that they have to put sideways on the bookshelf (because no matter where you are, I’ll always think of you).
Eddie’s Response, thrown away before it can be read:
  Secret Admirer,   I don’t think it’s all jocks—you’re too nice for that. But even you have to admit that a lot of the jocks are only doing it to be at the top of the food chain. Guys like Carver and Harrington Hagaon? They don’t even care about sports, they just want peons to fawn over them. But, there’s people like you, too, so maybe more of them are better than I expect.   I can’t imagine knowing who you are and not liking you. You’re the nicest girl I know. You don’t have to tell me who you are, but if you do? I promise, it’ll all be okay.   Yours, always,   Eddie   P.S. You don’t have to “be better,” baby. I just want you to be you. That will always be enough for a guy like me.
Eddie’s Letter, handed directly to Chrissy:
Chrissy, I’m sorry for not being up front with you. I was just afraid, but not anymore. I don’t want you to think you’re not good enough for me because baby, you’re everything. Every word you write on the page means everything to me. You have to know that. I can’t imagine this year without you in it. You’ve brightened my days far more than you could ever know. I want the chance to do the same for you. I want to get you flowers, and show up at your door with my hair combed just right. I want to hold your hand at the drive-in. If you want that, too, I’ll pick you up this Friday. They’re showing Romancing the Stone, my treat. Hopefully Yours, Eddie P.S. You don’t have to “be better,” baby. I just want you to be you. That will always be enough for a guy like me.
Steve’s Letter, never delivered:
   Eddie —    I’m sorry I never got to read your last letter, but it wasn’t for me anyways. Maybe none of them were, not really. And I’m sorry about that, even sorrier about how your pretty face got caught in the ceasefire. I’m just full of sorries I’m to scared to tell to your face—from the way you ran when you saw me in the hallway this morning, maybe you wouldn’t want me to anyway.    You’ve always been the brave one, so you must really want to not see me, huh? I hope you and Jeff are friends again. I’m sorry about that too, I’m the one who asked him not to tell you. I was afraid, but that’s no excuse.    I don’t know how to stop wanting to right write to you. I can’t turn off the part of me that still wants to know everything about you. There’s a whole in my heart, and I keep trying to find people to fill it, but I can never be in love with someone who loves me back. You know?    I’m sorry, Eddie. Maybe someday, I’ll get to say it to your face.    Sorry,    Steve
Eddie’s Letter, left in Steve’s locker:
   Steve,    I wanted to start this out by saying that I’m sorry—it’s a phrase I’m becoming alarmingly used to saying in recent weeks. To Jeff, to Gareth, and now to you. No matter how surprised I was, I had no right to say all that shit to you. And for that, I’m sorry, okay? Really, truly sorry.    As Chrissy and Jeff pointed out once you’d left, I was a dick, and there’s no excuse for that. And as my uncle told me when he was doing his disappointed parent shtick, I might have been projecting, just a tad.    Eddie Munson might be gay—who knew?    So, I’ll hope you accept my sincerest apologies for how I’ve handled this whole thing, Steve. I can’t imagine how it must have felt. Well, I can now, a bit. And it’s scary, right? But, I think it’s my turn to be brave. If I haven’t already ruined any chance I might have had, maybe we can go on a date?    I’ll pick you up this Friday at your house, say around seven? If you don’t answer the door, I’ll understand. That’ll be my answer.    But I really, really, really hope you do.    Yours, always, hopefully,    Eddie
Eddie’s note, hand-delivered at the end of their first date:
   Second Date? Yes ☐ No ☐    First Kiss? Yes ☐ No ☐
Steve’s Letter, delivery not pictured (slipped into the pocket of Steve’s Letterman during their second date):
   Eddie —    I know we don’t have to do this anymore, but I miss it. Isn’t that the strangest thing? I’m happy talking to you face to face, holding your hand beneath the table, pressing my lips against yours, but I miss reading your words, and I miss writing my own.    So, here I am, writing you the day before our second date, so nervous and excited I might just throw up. Because we can do it now, you know? We can do all the things we’ve talked about (and more). I’m excited to do them with you.        If the date goes well, I want you to put this under your pillow, hold my face in your mind, and dream of me.    Hopefully Yours, Hopefully Always,    Steve    P.S. I know you can just put them in my locker now, but maybe put this one in The Return of the King? Just this once, for me?
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monowritestoomuch · 3 days ago
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Dilf!Seth headcanons?? I need Dilf Seth content..
EDIT: OML IM SO SORRY I DIDNT REALIZE THERE WERE DILF!SETH AUDIOS. So sorry! Just take this as my au and I’ll listen to those and write another one of these. That is not an au!
Notes: So sorry this was so late! I’ve been so busy lately so here you go anon! This isn’t exactly up my alley but I did my best. Enjoy!
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MY AU!Dilf!Seth Headcannons
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Dilf!Seth has a few grey hairs that you jest about every so often, making him roll his eyes and push his hair back, looking to see if there are actually grey hairs
When Dilf!Seth stands up from a chair, his knees crack and he arches his back, a large crack sounding and him making a grunting noise as you stifle a laugh and he asks you why you’re laughing.
Dilf!Seth is very tall, slightly shorter than he was in his younger years, but he was still tall by tall standards.
This caused you to always peck him on the nose as he covered you in kisses from chapped lips that you would trace your thumb over fondly, a gentle smile on your face and a loving smile on his.
Dilf!Seth has dimples when he smiles, only becoming more noticeable with time. 
Whenever he smiles at you warmly, causing his dimples to show, you peck a kiss on each cheek, giggling with glee as Seth feigns confusion before picking you up and tickling your sides, pecking kisses into your hair. 
Dilf!Seth loves grilling. It might be a Southern thing, it might just be a Dilf!Seth thing, but he loves grilling out on the back patio of the house during the summer. 
You better bet he’s grilling barbecue and that he has meats on the smoker, that have definitely been in the smoker for more than 6 hours at that point, but he tells you not to be impatient and that it’ll only taste good if it smokes for 48 hours, scouts honor.
He loves surprising you with gifts. Whenever he gets home from work, he’ll always bring you something. And on Fridays, he ALWAYS brings home ice cream, and it’s always your favorite flavor.
Dilf!Seth was always self-conscious of how he looked, having lost some of what he considered his ‘handsome looks’ from his youth, but you pay no mind, telling him he’s handsome all over and that while he might not look like a Hollywood rocker, but he's your Southern biker man. His eyes crinkle as he smiles, pecking a kiss to your lips.
Speaking of eye crinkles, Dilf!Seth has eye crinkles when he smiles, making him feel old, and you joke about them until he seems a bit upset about the crinkles, stopping your jokes and starting an apology and a nice, big, warm, hug. 
He and you end up cuddling on the couch on a Friday night, instead of going out like many of your friends. He and you cuddle up on the couch, under blankets with SEVERAL tubs of your favorite ice cream  being shared with two spoons between the both of you as you watch a terrible horror movie and you cuddle in closer to his large, warm chest.
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Taglist: (None yet, let me know if you’d like to be added.) =)
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mikuni14 · 2 days ago
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15 Day BL Challenge - Day 4
Day 4: Fave Ship Dynamic
Since I can't choose one favorite dynamic, I'll allow myself to write a few:
EQUALITY in a relationship will always be my top priority, which I understand as a situation where no one is exploited, or led like a child in the relationship, or dominated, even if one of them is naturally dominant. To make it more complicated, I actually like relationships in which one is clearly more dominant, for example stronger physically, or in the hierarchy, is richer, has power, BUT NOT OVER THEIR LOVED ONE, is actually even dependent on him. The point is that both have the same power over each other, are equally dependent on each other, both support each other to the best of their abilities, no one gives more or less. It is ideal when the seamingly "weaker" one has even a slight advantage in the relationship, to make it more fair. A good example of this relationship is Hannibal or Nagron 😋 There are many BL series with equal characters, most of them will appear below (but I'll start with a gif of these guys, equal in everything, and that widening of Zhou Zi Shu's eyes at the sight of Wen Ke Xing is one of the best things in BLs I've ever seen 💖)
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most often, equality in a relationship goes hand in hand with my second favorite dynamic: when both are mature. I LOVE it when a couple is made up of adults, mature people who know who they are, know that they are interested in each other and the only obstacles in their relationship are external. From BL series, these are: Laws of Attraction, Manner of Death, Jun & Jun (excellent examples 10/10) as well as The Untamed, Word of Honor, KinnPorsche, 4 Minutes, Our Dating Sim, To Sir, With Love. This equality and maturity can just as well appear in series with young characters as in The On1y One
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my other favorite dynamic also goes hand in hand with equality: when both are smart, they are professionals in what they do, like in The Sign, Laws of Attraction, The On1y One, Be Loved In House: I Do, Jun & Jun (see the gif above) and of course The Untamed and Word of Honor (I can't help but mention Beyond Evil, The Devil Judge, Killer and Healer, not BLs we all know better 😎)
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when both are good at communication, I love it when characters TALK to each other, even when they argue, as long as they COMMUNICATE
the best and the rarest: when they trust each other and believe in each other, that the other person will handle the truth, the problems, that they will help, that TOGETHER THEY WILL DEAL with whatever life throws at them, when they talk about what's going on in their lives including the bad stuff, no noble sacrifice and keeping the loved one in the dark "for their own good". It's very possible that in all the BLs I've watched there was a couple who was honest with each other from the beginning until the end, but I can't remember one now... (Beyond Evil, Love in Translation started doing it by the end)
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but I also like it when someone in the couple is unhinged, crazy, like Sahashi in Cosmetic Playlover, or a himbo like Sprite in Twins, or a golden retriever type but a real one like in Sing My Crush, especially when the other one is a bit grumpy and gloomy, like in those series, I love it!
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I also like calm, stoic, solid types, at the same time totally whipped for their loved ones 🥰 such as the characters played by Noh in Nitiman and Oh! My Sunshine Night. Special mention should be made of someone similar to this type, but also noble and old-fashioned in a charming way, like San from Century of Love, and the guys from To Sir, With Love
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grimwarden · 2 hours ago
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i could do with a toggle, honestly, but i think it's fine to use it as a storytelling tool. my issue is how arbitrary it is.
it's telling the player "you made a choice" but actually none of the choices matter. in heart, stuff like the drink choice is good, but in truth, none of the dialogue or story choices actually make a difference. they are just there to tell that there is a difference.
i don't like any of the choices that were like davrin vs lace but honestly what makes them worse to me isn't that they exist at all, but that they are in a game full of arbitrary choices that don't matter.
now dagna is one of my favorite things to come out of worldstates, but it's narrow to think all the decisions as a part of a worldstate. there were so many instances where choices matter in the moment. redcliffe village is such a good example.
da2 had a lot of scripted events too, and i'm definitely not saying everything was a masterclass in writing, but it really juggled well the player vs character.
dai had many mistakes of trying to make the same player vs character tıe, but i would say the dialogue wheel still mattered better, if not more.
One of my big issues with Veilguard actually comes down to how In Your Face the UI is.
It's incredibly immersion breaking when I compare it to any other game I've loved. The UI is there to tell you not only which dialogue choices Matter with a capital M (which imo really cheapens the Harding vs. Davrin, Neve vs. Bellara choices towards the end) but also to pat itself on the back whenever a decision you made previously is affecting the storyline. It's constantly in the corner telling me how Lucanis will remember I like chocolate rather than just letting me find out in a future dialogue that Lucanis bought me some.
It's also just definitely a shortcut sometimes. It would pop up and tell me things where happening when those things weren't. When it said 'Neve will fight hard for the city' towards the end of her quest I was like...oh shit is she gonna die? But she just. Fights a normal battle. She doesn't even get hurt! I wouldn't have known that was supposed to be a consequence if it hadn't told me which is baaaaad writing.
And the way it makes the companion quests feel like chores...I've spoken about this before but it's like. Inquisition changed the tarot cards themselves when you'd completed a companion quest/romanced someone and that felt like a nice compromise but Veilguard is out there putting a special little symbol on people and giving them brand new armour and it all feels a little too much like finish this task so we can defeat the gods rather than explore this characters story because they're a companion and they're interesting.
I got so excited when I found out hardening mechanics were in this game but they're really just there for show. Nothing demonstrably seems to change between hardened Neve and unhardened Neve in the long run, it's just a change to how she functions in the party.
Idk I think it's a very tell don't show game because of the UI.
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