#that’s right mr chips origin story

[adobe-outdesign]

Kung Fu Panda 4 Rewrite Thing

Been chewing on this movie for a while now and wanted to take a shot at improving it. Some parts are a bit rough but I think this gets the general idea across.

As a rule, I'm trying to keep most of the characters and elements/plot beats in place rather than spinning things off in a completely unrelated direction. I also am aware of the restrictions placed on this movie, such as an unwillingness to rehire high-profile VAs and runtime limitations. This is just meant to be a "what if" kind of thing. That said:

We open with a stylized sequence of Po telling the story of his and the Five's latest battle. As it ends it's revealed he's at the grand opening of Mr. Ping's brand new bigger, better noodle shop location, talking to the customers.

As one of them asks where the Five are now, Po explains that they got summoned to their own individual missions, but they'll be back soon.

(Yes I am still having them be MIA, as Po needs to be alone with Zhen for part of the movie. However, they'll only gone for the first part of this rewrite and for a very specific plot-related reason.)

(The thing with Po needing to give up his title of Dragon Warrior makes no sense for multiple reasons, so let's just drop that plot point entirely. I get that it's meant to tie into the "change" moral, but I'd rather have Po imparting this lesson onto Zhen instead of learning it himself, as otherwise it undermines the character growth he had in 3.

Also, Po isn't carrying the staff around with him constantly in this rewrite, as it looks a bit silly and isn't plot relevant here.)

A messenger shows up to report that the Jade Palace is under attack. Po decides to rush over just in case Shifu needs backup... which he does, because he's being kidnapped in a small one of those magic-proofed cages from the actual film.

(Shifu being kidnapped was tossed around in the writing room originally and I want to keep it in this rewrite because it A) gives Shifu something to do, and B) I want to allow Zhen to openly be working with the Chameleon in order to help flesh out her character and avoid the lackluster plot twist, meaning she'll need new leverage against Po later on.)

The figure behind the kidnapping appears to be Master Elephant, which confuses Po as he's been missing for several months. Right as he's about to land a finishing blow, the figure shape shifts into Master Chicken, throwing Po's attack and resulting in him getting a bad head injury. He does his best to pursue the attackers, but can't keep up. Dismayed, he returns to the Jade Palace...

...And finds Zhen trying to steal something, using the commotion outside as a distraction. Po fights, but he's still badly injured and can't give it his all, resulting in Zhen being able to slip away with her prize—a dust bunny from under the furniture. Po is baffled.

(Side note: I would probably redesign Zhen so she actually looks like she matches the other characters' style, but I digress.)

Feeling dismayed, he returns to the noodle shop, where both his dads work on treating his wounds and comforting him. As Po explains what happened, Mr. Ping mentions that customers have been circulating rumors about a shapeshifting sorceress in Juniper City. Po decides that that's where he needs to go, promises his dads he'll be safe, and leaves.

(I'm cutting Mr. Ping and Li's subplot, because as much as I love them they don't really add much to the plot. It also feels like it goes against Mr. Ping's characterization in KFP 1 and 2 in particular.)

This is where we can have the scene of the Chameleon vs. the crime bosses. This can mostly stay the same except one of the bosses attempts to attack her when she shape shifts, causing her to retaliate with a magic-based attack. She also needs to straight-up kill the guy to establish her and her sorcery as a legit threat.

Po arrives at the Happy Bunny tavern to look for a ride to Juniper City. As he talks to Fish and Chip, he notices Zhen nearby doing some black market trading with Granny Boar to obtain a white feather. Po confronts her and she tries to run out with the feather, causing the boar family to pursue in a big fight scene.

Po and Zhen manage to escape, Zhen stashing the feather. Po threatens to have her sent to jail, but Zhen confirms she's working for the Chameleon and can lead Po to her so he can rescue Shifu. Po dislikes this situation, but has no choice but to agree.

(Unlike in the actual film, I would make it so her lair is hidden in some fashion; magic that keeps it camouflaged would be appropriate for a chameleon, or it could be underground or hidden behind something. Regardless, it should be impossible to locate without Zhen's assistance.)

On the boat ride over to Juniper city, Zhen says that she has to "obtain" one more item from the local history museum or she'll be in big trouble with the Chameleon. Po doesn't like this detour, but once again has no choice in the matter.

Po asks why Zhen would want to work for someone so obviously evil, and this is the point where Zhen admits she was adopted by the Chameleon and we get her backstory.

(I would establish that the Chameleon has an actual name, but only Zhen uses it. It shows that Zhen is closer to her than most, not quite seeing her as a mother but not fearing her enough to use her preferred title. Also, the Chameleon's the only KFP villain without a proper name and that bothers me.)

The backstory can be the same, but the part about her living on the streets and meeting the Chameleon for the first time should be merged into a single flashback.

Zhen says that Po couldn't understand, but Po reveals that he's also adopted, and that he probably would commit some noodle-related crime if his dad asked him to. Still, Zhen insists that people don't change, and that includes her.

They arrive at Juniper city (Po is impressed at its size but he very much is not acting like he's never seen a city before). Zhen covers up her muzzle and tucks her tail under her clothes so she won't be recognized.

Zhen is ready to break into the museum, but Po says that he's got this and goes up to the guards to tell them that he has some official Dragon Warrior business to take care of and will need to borrow some ancient artifacts.

Unlike in the actual film, everyone ready acknowledges him as the Dragon Warrior. The guards are more than happy to loan him whatever he needs... until Zhen's tail pops out and the guards recognize her, prompting them to attack.

During the scuffle, Zhen uses a chi blast to knock back one of the guards, but almost gets taken out by the other guard coming up behind her. Po defends her but gets mildly injured as a result.

After the fight, Po asks about the chi move and Zhen states that the Chameleon taught her the basics.

Zhen confirms that the Chameleon is a master of chi, and that the sorcery she uses is a specific type of chi manipulation.

(The reason I'm connecting chi to her powers is that it makes them feel a bit less out of left field, and helps 4 feel like a logical progression from 3.)

Zhen admits that she's not very good at using chi, but Po points out that it took him years to use chi in battle. He also compliments her on her kung fu, and she confirms she's self-taught.

(In this rewrite, Zhen is good at fighting but not quite at the level she is in the actual movie. This is to address the issue of who taught her if the Chameleon doesn't know kung fu.)

He takes a moment to give her a few pointers, which causes her to ask why he took that blow for her earlier, figuring there's a catch. Po just says it's the right thing to do, but Zhen is skeptical, figuring he only did it because he still needs her to lead him to Shifu.

The reminder of Shifu prompts Po to move on, and they grab the item Zhen was after, a 500 year old set of blades, then run for it.

Po and Zhen arrive at the Chameleon's lair, and Zhen shows Po how to get inside and tells him where Shifu is being held. She says that she'll take the items to the Chameleon, which will distract her while Po breaks him out. Po thanks her, and the two separate. Zhen warns him of booby traps on the way out.

There are indeed booby traps, such as those saw contraptions from the actual movie and a bunch of guards. It takes Po a few minutes, but he eventually gets through them.

Po finds Shifu being held in a dark room. Shifu is glad to see him, but warns him to be careful as the Chameleon's likely not far away. Po explains Zhen's distraction and moves to free him... only for a cage to fall down and trap him as well.

"Shifu" is then revealed to be the Chameleon in disguise, who slips through the bars via shape shifting into a mantis and thanks Zhen for her help. Zhen apologizes to Po, who's naturally upset ("I mean, I know you were evil, but I didn't think you were THAT evil").

Zhen hands over the three items she collected, and it's confirmed what they are: a dust bunny that contains a clump of Tai Lung's fur, a feather from Lord Shen, and a pair of blades once wielded by Kai.

Po mistakenly interprets this as the Chameleon being a collector of kung fu memorabilia and tries to chat about the Jade Palace's collection, much to her bafflement.

The Chameleon explains that a trace of a person's chi remains long after their death, and demonstrates by doing The Tongue Thing on Kai's blade, stripping its chi, and immediately taking his form.

(As you may have picked up on, this rewrite removes the spirit world elements entirely. While they are really interesting, I think cutting them is the best option because:

1. There is so much plot involved with bringing Po's old enemies back that you could make that an entire movie in and of itself. It's hard to do it justice when you're cramming it in around the edges of this movie.

2. It makes the Chameleon too similar to Kai in terms of abilities.

3. Having her rely on stealing other's kung fu makes her come across as weak despite being a powerful sorceress.)

Po asks her if her goal is to take over China, but she says no; she just wants to end the practice of kung fu for good, and prove that sorcery is the superior option. To prove it, she has Shifu brought in.

While having your chi stripped does not remove one's kung fu abilities in this rewrite, it is still removing part of one's life energy and thus weakening them severely for a period of time—ergo, Shifu is still unable to fight at his best. Still, he manages to hold his own.

Instead of using kung fu, the Chameleon relies on the brute animalistic strength and inherent abilities of the forms she takes, switching whenever she's loosing to keep her opponents on her toes and even transforming into Shifu himself for a period. She also uses a few chi-based attacks.

Just when it looks like Shifu is about to win the fight, she uses her tongue to strip the chi from the fur clump, taking the form of Tai Lung. Shifu is so shocked and distraught that he fails to attack, allowing the Chameleon to land a serious blow.

She returns to her original form and states that when the blood moon has risen, she will battle and take down every master in the middle of Juniper city, where everyone can learn just how useless kung fu and the people who teach it are. She leaves Po in his cage panicking over Shifu, who's unresponsive.

Zhen follows the Chameleon outside, where we get the "does the blood moon always rise so slowly" gag. Noticing that Zhen looks troubled, she asks what's wrong, and Zhen talks about how Po encouraged her to do the right thing. Even though she's been told that kung fu masters are elitist, selfish people, she couldn't see any of that in Po.

(Side note: I want to establish in this rewrite that while the Chameleon will claim up and down that Zhen is only a pawn for her to use, she does care about her to some extent, even though probably loathes the fact she does. For example, when talking to Zhen here, she might pick some rubble out of her fur or something to show there's a teeny tiny bit of actual affection hidden there.

The reason for this is that all other KFP villains have had an emotional anchor—Shifu for Tai Lung, Shen's parents for Shen, and Oogway for Kai. The Chameleon being abusive but having some real love for Zhen and Zhen struggling with her gaslighting adds a lot more depth to both of them.)

The Chameleon finally reveals her backstory, which should be told in a hyper-stylized way à la the flashbacks in KFP 2 and 3. Just like Zhen, she grew up on the streets as an orphan, broke and starving. She admired kung fu greatly and wanted to learn it, but everyone turned her away for having no money to pay for lessons.

One day, she found a shiny jade amulet on the streets that someone lost, finally giving her a much-needed break. She is able to use that money to enroll in classes.

The problem was that while the money changed her financial status, it didn't change the way people saw her. Her master still considered her a lowly gutter rat and treated her as such, verbally insulting her and beating her down during training sessions. It's very much like how Shifu treated Po in KFP 1, except worse, especially because the Chameleon is a small and fragile animal.

Finally, during one training session she became too injured to move. Her master told her to quit and started to walk away, only for her to grab his leg with her tongue to trip him up. However, at the peak of her self-loathing, she instead discovered her chi stealing abilities and transformed into him. It's not shown, but it is implied she killed him.

As the flashback ends, the Chameleon shifts into Zhen and tells her that no matter how much you change, you can't change the way other people see you. Siding with Po, she says, will only get her hurt. Zhen nods and unexpectedly hugs the Chameleon, telling her she knows, and runs off.

Cutting back to Po, we see him frantically trying to break the bars of his cage. Zhen comes forward and drops down on her hands and knees, apologizing for everything. Po says that she came back, and that's what matters.

She reveals that the "hug" was actually just a way for her to get the key off of the Chameleon, and she uses it to unlock Po's cage. Po runs over to Shifu and he and Zhen heal him with chi, and we get a callback to the "I'M NOT DYING YOU IDIOT" scene from KFP 1.

However, while Shifu's not dying, he is very badly injured and can barely walk on his own. Po asks how they can take on the Chameleon and her army with just three of them, but Zhen holds up the key and suggests they get an army of their own.

Running downstairs, Zhen reveals where the other masters are being held. To Po's shock, the Furious Five are among those captured. Tigress confirms that the summons they received were traps laid by the Chameleon, and she already has their forms.

Also down there are the other crime bosses, as it feels like they just disappear in the actual film after their scenes.

Zhen only manages to unlock the Five's cages before before the Chameleon snatches the key back with her tongue, revealing that she knew Zhen was lying to her. Behind her, her army assembles.

Tigress confirms that that the Five will take on the army, and Po faces off with the Chameleon one-on-one. She strips the feather and uses Shen's form to fly up and take the upper ground, trying to kick a cage onto him. Zhen helps deflect it, and the Chameleon tells her to stay out of the way. Po and her continue to battle.

Despite Po's best attempts at blocking it, she does finally stick him with her tongue. He grabs it and throws her a distance in her fragile base form, injuring her but still giving her some of his chi in the process.

The Chameleon takes on Po's form next, and we get a fight similar to the one in the movie, though once again with her using less kung fu and more magic and physical attacks.

She mentions how she was rejected and tries to tell him that he should be on her side, because a bit fat panda like him must have been treated just as badly as she was. Po denies this, but Shifu admits it's pretty accurate. Po says he's not helping.

Po admits that she has a point, except she forgot one thing, and we get a callback to the "I'm THE big fat panda" moment from KFP 1.

The two attack at the same time. As the dust clears, it's revealed that neither are doing great—Po has gotten a lot of little injuries and the chi stealing has weakened him. The Chameleon is struggling to shapeshift at all, with the attempt causing her pain, and instead settles for trying to blast him. Zhen steps in and manages to redirect the attack back at her.

The Chameleon takes the blow and ends up back on the floor as a parallel to her flashback. Zhen reaffirms that she disagrees with her worldview—people can change, and she's going to prove it. If the Chameleon wants get to Po, she'll need to get through her first.

The Chameleon kind of laughs this off at first before realizing she's dead serious. She states that Zhen isn't even good at fighting, but Po disagrees, giving Zhen a confidence boost. The Chameleon struggles to her feet as if readying an attack, everyone braces themselves... and she surrenders, too injured to fight and unable to bring herself to hurt Zhen.

(There are a few reasons why I think her surrendering makes for an interesting defeat here:

1. There's no spirit realm portal to yeet her into in this version;

2. There's only so many times Po's enemies can be yeeted directly into the spirit realm before it gets old;

3. It adds character depth, and;

4. It ties back nicely in to the theme of change and that it's never too late to do the right thing.)

Zhen helps the Chameleon up, Tigress does the same for Po, and Monkey does the same for Shifu. The five reveal that despite being exhausted, they still managed to wipe the floor with the Chameleon's army, which Zhen thinks is incredible. Po introduces Zhen to them formally, and Shifu asks if they can save the introductions for after they get medical treatment.

Later on, Po (carrying the staff Oogway gave him) approaches Zhen, who's sitting under the peach tree by the Jade Palace. He asks her if she's doing okay after everything that's happened. She says she's alright, but is pretty scared of what's going to happen next, given that the Chameleon's in jail and she has nowhere to go.

Po reveals that him and Shifu have been talking, and he plans to open a new school as part of the Jade Palace that will offer free kung fu lessons to anyone who's interested in learning. Zhen asks if there are any spots open, and we end similar to the actual movie, with her training alongside the five.

the credits still end with the Jack Black cover of Baby One More Time because it slaps

[ikroah]

I have reached the breaking point, the point of no return, it’s very clear to see a fool like me will never, ever learn. I have reached the breaking point, I hear the drums of doom, I’m gonna flip my wig in one great big atomic boom! —“The Breaking Point,” Bobby Darin (1966)

It Keeps Right On a-Hurtin’ #27 - Ring-a-Ding-Ding VI

Collaborative Issue! Guest Artist: @sas-afras

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Notes / Transcript:

Notes

Huge thanks to Monty over at @sas-afras for getting this one done! I handled the original layout and lettering, but the rest was all them. Layouts like this can seem simple and easy because of how straight-forward and repetitive they are, but when all you've got are a dozen and one reaction shots, every single one of those reaction shots needs to be as perfect as you can get them. And Monty did a hell of a job. Especially on the coloring! Monty, if you're reading this, you're a hell of a good colorist (on top of everything else). Thanks again!

Another note about this issue is that it, along with the previous one, were some of the most difficult to write in this whole damn comic so far. I really hate repeating in-game dialogue verbatim without good reason, but there's really not much else I could do here. It's a very necessary part of the story that is also literally a part in the game where your character is fixed in place listening to a monologue. I took some liberties, did some punch-up, not just for its own sake but to really drive home what I find most interesting and vital here about Mr. House as a character.

Anyway, Agnes is in trouble. And there's only one issue left in Volume 2! The next one closes out this arc of the story, at long last. Stay tuned.

Transcript

INT. LUCKY 38 BASEMENT. From an observation deck of sorts, AGNES SANDS watches several SECURITRON robots position themselves in a testing area, containing several sandbags, dummies, and makeshift fortifications. A voice booms from an unseen speaker.

MR. HOUSE: You're well familiar with my Securitron police force. But have you ever wondered: what exactly makes them the marquee option in perimeter security and pacification?

AGNES glances in the direction of the voice, uncomfortable.

MR. HOUSE: Well to start, the reinforced titanium alloy housing of each unit, which protects its electronic core, easily deflects small arms and shrapnel.

MR. HOUSE: As for its offensive capabilities, its X-25 gatling laser—produced to spec by Glastinghouse, Inc.—is deadly against soft targets at medium range.

SFX: BZZTZZTZZTZZTZZT

AGNES recoils as a red glow washes over her from the testing area.

MR. HOUSE: And then for close-range suppression or crowd control, the Securitron is also armed with a 9mm sub-machinegun.

SFX: DAKKA DAKKA DAKKA DAKKA DAKKA DAKKA

AGNES shuts her eyes, wincing from the crack of gunfire.

MR. HOUSE: These features have been sufficient for keeping the peace within Vegas, but with the NCR and Legion closing in on Hoover Dam, and sizing up my city like a piece of prize cake, more than ever we need to be prepared for, well...external conflict. Policing is one thing, but when geopolitical powers are involved, my Securitrons can only pose so much of a threat.

MR. HOUSE: That is...if they're forced to rely exclusively on their secondary weapons--as they have been, all this time!

AGNES looks upward, surprised.

MR. HOUSE: Remember, the Great War interrupted a pivotal moment for RobCo's work. Consequently, all extant Securitrons have been stuck, running on a mere Mark I operating system—the first production version of the OS—which has simply lacked the software drivers for the use of their primary weapons all this time!

AGNES looks around, as if HOUSE were in the room somewhere and she could find him, in a panic.

MR. HOUSE: The platinum chip, you see, was never just a token. At a time when industrial espionage ran rampant, it was minted as a high capacity, proprietary, and uniquely irreplicable data storage device. In a way, it's more like a computer chip. And now—with the data from the platinum chip finally installed onto my nextwork—it's time for a very crucial software update. Behold: the new Mark II Securitrons!

AGNES gawks downward at the testing area, eyes wide. Oh no.

MR. HOUSE: Their newly accessible M-235 Missile Launcher gives them the ability to engage ground and air targets at significantly longer ranges...

SFX: PSSSSSHHH KTHOOM THOOM THOOM THOOM

AGNES flinches, covering her face for protecting, and screams as explosions rip apart the testing area below.

MR. HOUSE: ...and their rapid-fire G-28 grenade launching system, another part of the Mark II, makes them much more powerful in close-range engagements as well.

SFX: THMP THMP THMP KRRSSH KRAKTK KABOOM

AGNES, nearly frozen, watches the bombardment with horror.

MR. HOUSE: It also includes rewritten drivers for the Securitrons' auto-repair systems—although always sophisticated, the new optimizations render them inexhaustible in even the most protracted and attritious of engagements. Altogether, the Mark II upgrade confers a 235% total increase in combat effectiveness per unit—and it's all because of you!

AGNES lowers her arm slowly, jaw slack, mortified.

MR. HOUSE: Vegas finally has an army—worthy to protect not just the city itself, but the best interests of all of mankind, at home and abroad. Which is to say: this simple display of might remains a mere teaser for what I can, and what I will, accomplish, in an illustrious new epoch.

AGNES sinks further into a paralytic terror.

MR. HOUSE: What we will accomplish, Agnes—should you accept my offer, of employment. Ah—but I digress. I'm certain that you've had a long day. You can rejoin Miss Cassidy in the presidential suite for the night, if you'd like to, as they say, "sleep on it."

MR. In fact...say for as long as you'd like. However long you may need, to think everything over. And you'll be very well provided for in the meantime, consider it a taste of what could be...should you make the right choice before you.

MR. HOUSE: That reminds me—I've already sent Victor to collect your belongings from the Vault 22 Hotel, so no need to exhaust yourself further by making that trip on your own, hm? There's much about your future to consider, Agnes—and I would like you to think of it as our future.

AGNES stares straight ahead with a deadened expression.

The testing area in the basement has been reduced to smithereens. Fires rage on the rubble of obliterated structures, gnarled steel, and collapsed walkways. The dummies have been dismembered entirely.

MR. HOUSE: ...Goodness, what a mass. With friends like these, I sure wouldn't envy my enemies.

MR. HOUSE: Wouldn't you agree?

[telvess]

Headcanons for all the characters including Jack since it’s based on Hamlet watching The lion king with the reader. (the original animated movie not the live action remake.)

Record Of Ragnarok Characters x Reader watching together The Lion King (headcanons) 🔞

You know, I haven’t watched The Lion King in… well I watched it once when I was kid and that’s it. Mulan, Hercules and Tarzan were my movies. Anyway I ended up watching The Lion King again to refresh my memory.

Qin

A what? Are you involved? Then Qin would agree to do anything.

He’s like a big kid - chill and carefree, even more than usually. Both of you goof around, Mr. Emperor tries to sing without knowing words, popcorn flies around, you pause a movie in stupid moments to make him laugh etc.

You get a stomachache from laughing too much and Qin obviously has to get infected.

Just two morons have time of their afterlife.

The only moment when there is silence is when Simba loses his father. That scene just hits too close to home and remains Qin about Chun Yan. However he doesn’t let it bother him too much.

HAKUNA MATATA

You both loudly encourage lions to battle.

At the end he asks what other movies you like.

Jack

Because he isn’t familiar with the concept of love and how to express it, spending time with you is probably Jack’s way to show his affection. If you ask him to watch an animated movie together, he’d politely agree, even if it’s not his thing.

Expect tea. And cheddar apple pie.

Jack sees Simba’s journey as a lovely and naive story. Deep inside he does compare himself to that lion cub and wonders what kind of person he would've become if he had only received help from strangers. On top of that Jack actually killed his parents, so it’s odd to him to see how much Simba struggles with remorse over Mufasa’s death which wasn’t his fault.

Truth to be told Jack might mentions some quotes from Shakespeare IF you point out similarities between the movie and Hamlet. These resemblances aren’t very visible. But it may be enough to start an interesting conversation.

The ending of the story may seems a bit bitter to Jack. Whoever was meant to be good, stayed good, and whoever was meant to be bad - stayed bad. Kinda depressing outcome for a man who’s trying to change himself, right? You’d have to talk about it and remind that it’s just a simplification made for children.

Now it’s time for a cuddle session.

Loki

Do you really want to do this to yourself? You’re very naive if you expect to have a fun with this guy while watching this kind of movie.

At first it’s just boring to him, but after awhile he amuses himself by coming up with new ways to destroy the show. He makes a loud comment every time the opportunity arises. For example, there is a scene where Zaku tells young Simba and Nala that they’d be married one day, to which Simba replies: No way! She’s my friend! You can hear a loud snort on the side, followed by She’s your SISTER, dumbass!

Loud chewing.

Hey, y/n, do you know that once Simba becomes the king, he will have kids with every lioness? Even his mom?

Do they have to sing all the time?

DON’T YOU DARE mention that you can see a similarity between him and hyenas or forget about chips, popcorn, whatever you two are eating.

Phew! It’s finally over. Wanna do something funny, y/n?

Adamas

Childish entertainment but once he sees that your eyes get wet with tears, he quickly agrees.

A cheerful start bores him but except tactless way of sitting, he doesn’t do anything to ruin your fun.

Even if Mufasa’s death was expected, it still hits hard Adamas. Basically catches him off guard. It remains him about his last meeting with Poseidon: his brother’s pure contempt towards him, that dead, indifferent expression of his face when he pierced Adamas with his trident, then cold surrounding body and Poseidon’s back as he walked away. But while the movie continues, a new digression haunts Adamas. He plays that scene again in his head and it hits him harder, because he realizes that he almost became Scar to Zeus.

So now he sits stiffly on his ass with a very depressed expression. One look at him is enough for you to know that you have to pause the movie and talk to a guy. At first he rejects your attempts, but very quickly ends up letting you hug him tight. Still plays a tough idiot tho…

Beelzebub

Most of the time he just sits next to you with lifeless expression.

Hakuna matata his ass.

Beelzebub secretly enjoys when you sing, but it’s really hard to catch him with a smile on his face. If you manage to do so, he reluctantly admits it. Good luck with convincing him to join you.

He doesn’t have any deeper thoughts about the movie.

If you mention that Timon and Pumba remain you Samael and Azazel, Beelzebub would just give you a dull look. After awhile he starts to notice that too and has mixed feelings about it.

Hrist

She finds this idea very sweet. It’s relaxing and enjoyable.

When Scar kills Mufasa: RAGE MODE ACTIVATION!

Since then you sit with angry Hrist who really does not like phrase hakuna matata. She starts to hate Simba for being so thoughtless.

Screams SHUT UP every time they start singing.

When Simba lets Scar leave, Hrist in heat of the moment chokes you and loudly screams how dumb he is. You wonder if it can get worse and the answer comes very quickly - Simba fights Scar on the TV screen and you fight for every breath on a couch.

Hermes

Hermes approaches the movie from a different angle: he focuses more on a soundtrack. The movie itself is simple story with moral, standard for humans’ approval.

You both consider an improvement of some songs and probably start doing it in the middle of a movie. Sorry, Simba.

Ares

Ares doesn’t care much about Mufasa’s death - it's necessary plot twist to move on with thread… but the ending kinda touches him. It's very climatic in his opinion.

He is NOT crying, okay?

Well you are. Or you pretend very convincingly so he doesn’t have to play tough boy. He has no idea…

Hades

Because he is a gentleman, your wish would be granted.

It’s animated movie but Hades drinks wine. No cola, no popcorn or other snacks. Please, have some dignity.

Hades has weird uncomfortable feeling in his chest when Scar kills his own brother. Scene just awakes something he doesn’t like to mention: conflict between Poseidon, Adamas and Zeus. Hades never could bring himself to blame any of them for how things turned out, so now he doesn’t try to look too deep into Musafa’s murder.

Afterwards he would share his honest opinion with you, almost like professional critic.

Poseidon

No expression throughout the entire movie.

Scar is pathetic.

Mufasa is pathetic.

Simba is pathetic.

Timon and Pumba aren’t even worth mentioning.

That movie proves that humans are lower forms of life.

At least you have chance to hug Poseidon. If he spends time with you, it means he demands it.

After a movie: Y/n, such entertainment is unworthy of the gods.

Leonidas

Books are better than movies. But fine, if you insist, the King of Sparta would spare some time.

The best comforter: Why are you crying? It’s fiction! It’s not even human! By the way - that lion could kill you with a single paw swing. These mfs are huge! Better him than you, hon!

He smokes so much that you have trouble seeing the TV screen.

Stop couching, hon! I can’t hear what they’re sayin’!

The moment Pumba approach, Leonidas starts talking about his love for venison.

You need truly heroic self-denial to not kick him out. The only option to get him to shut up is to kiss him. He doesn’t get why the kiss is angry but he likes it that way.

You two probably miss the ending. Leonidas thinks Simba isn’t worthy of being king anyway.

Apollo

Ah, y/n, aren’t you adorable for loving such innocent enjoyment? Of course he agrees!

You have to feed him snacks.

He sings along with the characters and makes the movie much better. You end up watching him showing off instead of the movie. Your dirty side may bait off a bit more mature show.

He knows exactly what you're doing and doesn't mind at all.

Later you might catch him humming songs from the movie.

Hello, dear. May I be your king tonight?

Rudra

Simba’s and Nala’s childhood brings nostalgia. Rudra spent his entire youth with Shiva and they were both free spirits. Watching these lion cubs brings back many funny memories.

Rudra’s favourite moment is Simba’s reunion with Nala. He gets mad if he notices you smirking.

Parvati, Kali, Durga and Shiva

You decide it’s time for girls’ night out.

None of you is focus on the movie, it’s just an addition. You mostly talk and laugh. Very loud that it may attracts Shiva.

He just sits down between you with Whatcha doin’? then proceeds to eats all the popcorn and other snacks like vacuum cleaner.

[zannolin]

now that my break and my four-disc edition of narnia has arrived i am going to subject you all to the things i am obsessing over or thought were very fun from the audio commentaries and bonus stuff that i KNOW has been talked about elsewhere i'm sure but NOT ON MY BLOG! so here's a list of stuff i'm foaming at the mouth over from the filmmakers' (not the actors') commentary on LWW:

knew this already but to hear it made me scream; it was peter's plan to use the gryphons bombarding the witch's army with rocks at the beginning of the battle of beruna, and he got that idea from the blitz bombings that the movie itself opens with. GOD.

they shot the film as much in chronological order as they could, despite it being inefficient, because they wanted to capture the changes that narnia (the atmosphere, the exercise, the scenes, etc) would bring out in each character/actor.

every line in the set built for the wardrobe is directing the viewer's eye to the wardrobe itself. the decision to cover it was last-minute and somewhat debated because it wasn't originally in the book, but everyone agreed it was 100% worth it for the effect.

they were not able to make the wardrobe out of apple wood like it is in the books but they WANTED TO and made it out of the closest they could get which. god. i love when people CARE.

a bunch of the furniture in the set of the professor's house is literal antique english furniture??? for the accuracy and the vibe???

everyone talks about how skandar was the last one cast and how he spent a lot of time off filming on his own and thus hit all the right vibes of being the odd one out, BUT did you know while they really liked william, anna, and georgie for the other pevensies, they weren't going to cast any of them unless all four actors (whichever four that may be) clicked and worked well as a family? again: ME WHEN PEOPLE CARE.

i love when i'm right about minor set/costuming details i notice (the lamppost was specifically made to look as if it had grown; the witch wearing aslan's mane as a trophy and trying to symbolically Become him; the carvings on the wardrobe telling the story of the magician's nephew)

william moseley wasn't even supposed to hit skandar keynes with the cricket ball that was an accident and they decided to make it into part of the scene

andrew adamson is MY BEST FRIEND for shooting all the night scenes during the day and editing them to be night scenes which makes them very distinctly beautiful AND YOU CAN SEE WHAT'S HAPPENING.

the amount of suffering they endured to have nice looking grass on the set is so funny to me you guys have just got to listen to these commentaries. i can't even explain it.

crying because i missed this but when mrs. beaver gives lucy a plate of fish and chips THE CHIPS ARE WOOD CHIPS.

they used actual wolf hybrids for a lot of the shots with the wolves, not just cgi (though apparently they had to redo their tails because they were often too happy to be running around lmao) and it makes me sooo happy

tilda swinton's dress that she wore for the majority of the film was apparently so large in the shoulders she couldn't get through the door to the dungeon properly and just had to go at it sideways. AND she injured herself because of it.

they based the change in the witch's eyes from green during most of the film -> black when she kills aslan on hunting cats and how their pupils get REALLY big.

andrew adamson mentioned he thought about cutting father christmas from the movie as other adaptations had done but heard about how father christmas being there nearly ended tolkien and lewis' friendship and decided "well, i guess i don't have a say in it really if lewis STILL left him in there" and i love him for that.

i had so much freaking fun with this it was so amazing to see how much effort and work and love and care went into the crafting of this film. like they did not have to do all that. movies today will NOT do all that. they'll do such a shoddy job and cgi everything and not even make full costumes and stuff but LWW put all that work in and it was so good because of it. and i'm gonna be thinking about it forever.

[hodari-pavels-good-boy]

Espresso Chapter 1:

Knock on Wood

Ch1 Ch2 Ch3

Pairing: Hodari Pavel x Reader Word Count: 2.1k Chapter 1/? Rating: E Summary: "You take a moment to silently watch him work, a true master at his chosen craft. You take note how his arms tense before bringing them down in a powerful swing, a rhythmic motion he repeats over and over as he carves the ore from its resting spot in the Earth. You find it not too dissimilar from a sculptor chiseling one's vision from the marble slab before them. His eyes were heavy and focused on the mass of stone he was chipping away at and clearly he had been at it for quite awhile by this time if the sweat that’s beaded along his forehead and down his temple is any indication. His hair is stuck to his face and you can follow the trail down to a damp shirt and skin that almost seems to lightly glisten in the lantern provided light." --------------------------------------

You find yourself in an unfamiliar world with a new life before you. Maybe... you'll help someone find a new life too?

Tags: Angst, Angst with a happy ending, miscommunication, fluff, eventual smut

A/N: This is a multi chapter story! Gender is not specified (though I did originally start writing it with the intention of it being a male reader lol). Tags will be updated as the fic goes. Cross-posted Here on Ao3. Fic below the cut! Enjoy :)

It’s getting late in Kilima as you start to cross the path that leads from the town proper to Bahari Bay, the lantern bugs greeting you as you pass through the gate. Catching a few, you secure them in your empty lantern before starting our evening walk down to the mines. This is one of your favorite times of day, the busy world winding down and coming to a slow stop.

Most people are comfortable in their homes by now, starting dinner for them and their families and relaxing from a long day of work. The glow in the windows of the Pavel’s house ahead of you lends itself to your point. The local miner and his daughter must be settling down to tuck into a good meal right about now after a hard day down in the mines and the thought makes you smile as you pass by.

Over the last few months you’ve been here you’ve started to pick up a bit of a routine for yourself while also observing the local’s daily routines around you. It hasn't escaped your notice that you're one of the only humans that’s decided to stay in the Kilima region for now, most supposedly having moved on to The Capital in search of answers. While you understand the reasoning, that fact definitely aids itself to a feeling of loneliness and otherness in this foreign place, so it helps to see everyone around you maintain a sense of normalcy while you adjust to this new ‘normal’ for yourself.

Sooner than later, the earth beneath your feet becomes more gravel than dirt while the hills on either side of you that frame the well-worn path have become cliff faces and you know you're nearing the mines. The sun has long since set by now and the light evening chill now has a little bite to it. As you approach the entrance, you can hear the sound of metal hitting rock echoing off the cavernous walls. Adjusting your pack, you curiously follow the noise into the depths, wondering who is here so late besides yourself. Usually it's just you and silence that surrounds you to keep you company, so your interest is piqued. Rounding a corner, you find the town’s respected but quiet resident miner, Mr. Pavel. You haven't had a chance to really talk to him since he gave you your first pickaxe and helped you settle in on the plot you’re slowly starting to make into a home. He seems like a very private person who minds his own, so anytime you've seen him around town you haven't wanted to bother him. Besides he always seems like he's busy with places to be and you don't want to interrupt him if that's the case. Outside of the village though you hardly see him. Usually, he's long since left the mines to return home by the time you've made the lengthy journey from your plot all the way out here.

Since he hasn't noticed you yet, you take a moment to silently watch him work, a true master at his chosen craft. You take note how his arms tense before bringing them down in a powerful swing, a rhythmic motion he repeats over and over as he carves the ore from its resting spot in the Earth. You find it not too dissimilar from a sculptor chiseling one's vision from the marble slab before them. His eyes were heavy and focused on the mass of stone he was chipping away at and clearly he had been at it for quite awhile by this time if the sweat that’s beaded along his forehead and down his temple is any indication. His hair is stuck to his face and you can follow the trail down to a damp shirt and skin that almost seems to lightly glisten in the lantern provided light. You feel a light dusting of heat grace your cheeks as you watch him continue for another minute before the sound of the pickaxe abruptly stops, dragging you back into reality as a rough rough voice speaks up. 

“You comin’ in here or are you just enjoyin’ the show?” He asks, no patience in his tone as he turns to look where you’re standing. He raises his hand up to the light blinding you to him and you quickly turn the lantern away so it’s no longer shining directly in his eyes.

“Oh, it’s you.” He says in recognition. “Here again? At this point m’starting to get used to it but don't you have anything better to than spending your time down here in the dust and dirt this late?” He says it genuinely as if he’s actually curious and you wonder how many times he’s noticed you coming here. Enough that he isn't surprised by your presence it appears, but surely it can't be too often, you almost never see him yourself.

You set your lantern and pack down on the floor while you pull out your own pick that's ready to begin its service for the night. “Nah, I’m gonna be up for quite awhile yet. No rest for the wicked and all that.” You chuckle at your little joke for a moment before it dries up when you realize he’s not laughing with you. You clear your throat before looking back at your things, closing your pack and gathering all the items you set down as you stand up. Quickly glancing around you decide to head down one of the side shafts to save you both from any more of this awkward interaction and let the miner get back to work, clearly he has things he wants to get done if he’s still here this late. 

“Okay then, well, good chatting with you. You have a good rest of your night and I’m gonna go look for some ores to mine up. Good night.” You rush out a little awkwardly as you move toward the mine shaft, pausing at the entrance to give the wooden support beams a few knocks before heading down the carved out path. 

When you reach the end you give yourself a moment to collect your thoughts before getting to work. You like it down here, it's quiet and gives you time to think about anything and everything while your hands stay busy. As a small bonus, you're always so tired afterwards that by the time you return to your home plot and clean up you're always too exhausted for those same thoughts to keep you up. Seems like a win-win in your book.

Not too long after you start, you hear shuffling and the soft sounds of footsteps coming down the same route you just walked, the sound echoing off the long walls behind you. As the sound gets closer to you you hear the miner clear his throat before speaking up.

“I’ve been meanin’ to ask…” he starts and then trails off. You stop your mining and turn to get a better look at him, giving him the respect of your full attention so he knows you're listening to him. He's shifting his weight from side to side as he tries to find the words to convey what he’s thinking. Clearly he’s out of his comfort zone so it must be something he's been thinking about for a bit if he’s willing to go through the trouble of.. whatever this is.

Trying to help, you silently motion for him to continue, knowing you won’t be able answer whatever is on his mind if he doesn't share it. He clears his throat again before starting over. “I’ve been meanin’ to ask you, why do you do that?”

You blink a few times waiting for him to continue, but he just stands there with his arms crossed as he looks back at you. After a silent staring contest, you reach the conclusion he isn’t going to elaborate or say anything else. “Do what?” you ask confused, looking for clarification. 

At your response, Hodari looks down as if he regrets saying anything in the first place. He takes a sharp breath through his nose before he mimics your earlier knocking on the support beam next to him. “That- This knocking thing you do. I promise those supports are as sturdy as they get. Check ‘em myself twice a week.”

“Oh no! I’m not worried about that at all! I-” Stopping abruptly in your attempt to give an explanation. After a beat, “I’m not actually sure why I do it. I guess I've never really thought about it.”

Hodari stands across from you, recrossing his arms as he listens to your reasoning a little unbelievably. “You don’t know?”

You look away, breaking eye contact with the man. Being put on the spot like this has you feeling exposed, as though he can see right through you. Maybe it's just a symptom of being a father but it unnerves you, like he’ll know if you lie to him. A little self-consciously you answer, “Well.. yeah. It’s not like any of us remember what life was like before..” you trail off. Hodari stays silent. This time, however, it feels less of an oppressive silence but rather more curious as he nods his head for you to continue, so you do. “Humans, I mean. We don’t remember anything from before we appeared here, just our names. We tend to do a lot of things out of reflex but I don’t know where they're from or why I’m doing them. It’s not like we know nothing per se, I know the Earth is round and that a hot stove will burn and things like that even though I haven't done it or been explicitly told by any of the villagers. But I also sometimes feel I have to avoid cracks in the road when I'm walking and that I should avoid breaking mirrors at all costs but I cannot for the life of me tell you why. We all seem to have little things like this and it absolutely adds onto the ‘out of place’ feeling we experience, besides the whole being human in a world that humans don't exist in anymore thing. It's why it doesn't surprise me that most of us leave here, we all just want answers and to understand why we are here and where we are from as much as the rest of you want us out of your hair.” You lightly chuckle at the end but Hodari looks like he’s actually thinking about what you've just said.

The silence continues to stretch between the two of you as he absorbs all the information and you find your face flushing with embarrassment realizing you dropped a bunch of information about humans he didn't ask you for. Having gathered he’s not really one for talking this much you open your mouth to apologize and he holds up his hand to cut you off. He’s not looking at you now but rather down at the ground, his gaze locked on a pebble as he toes it with his boot. He doesn’t look up as he starts talking.

“I, uh, I didn't know that. The not rememberin’ anything.” He looks back up at you now, a little sheepish in his confession. “I haven't really talked to many of the humans after they appeared here. I just helped a few like you get set up on a small plot of land and give a few pointers every now and then so they don't get themselves killed in my mines before they head out of town to explore the rest of the world.” He hesitates for a few seconds before grabbing something from his back pocket. “Here.” he says, holding out his hand between the two of you, a pile of well worn leather in his hands. “Speakin’ of givin’ pointers, since you seem to be sticking around longer than most, you really should be wearing some gloves if you're gonna be at it this long. Take em’, it’s an older pair but they’re broken in and your hands will thank me later.”

Recognizing it as the olive branch it is, you reach out and take them. Before you can even begin to thank him, the miner is already picking up his own lantern and turning to head out of the mines. You follow him to the entrance and he pauses looking at the main wooden beam before giving it a quick rapt with his knuckles as he throws over his shoulder, “I’d wish ya luck findin’ those ores, but I don’t believe in luck.”

As his footfalls on the dirt and gravel fade away as he starts his trek home, something clicks inside your mind. Luck?

[Dividers by the-aesthetic-shop and firefly-graphics]

[noobiestnoober]

Plan F: Fabulous or Failure? (Damon X Reader)

This is a one shot-fic between Damon and Y/N Gilbert, who is the twin of Jeremy Gilbert. They are always upto no good and going around doing pranks. One day they decided to steal the moonstone from Klaus as a bargaining chip to make him leave the town.

I got this idea while going through story prompts. The link to the original post is here.

I hope you guys enjoy the story. <3

_____________________________________________________

"Let's just move on to plan F. F stands for fabulous."

"The way all your other plans have worked out so far, I would assume F also stands for failure."

Y/N rolled her eyes, her lips curling into a smirk, "You know, Damon, your lack of faith in me is both endearing and annoying."

Damon leaned against the wall, arms crossed, his trademark smirk firmly in place, "I'm just being realistic, Y/N. After Plan A was 'Avoiding Klaus,' Plan B was 'Befriending Klaus,' and Plan C was 'Running Away from Klaus,' I've noticed a pattern."

"Well, if you have any better ideas, Mr. I-Know-Everything, I'm all ears," Y/N shot back, placing her hands on her hips.

He chuckled, stepping closer, "You know I live for this kind of chaos. But let's hear about your 'fabulous' plan F. Maybe I'll be pleasantly surprised."

Y/N took a deep breath, dramatically flipping her hair, "Plan F involves us sneaking into Klaus's mansion, stealing the moonstone, and using it to leverage him into leaving town."

Damon raised an eyebrow, "Bold. Reckless. Probably doomed to fail. I like it."

"That makes one of us," Y/N muttered under her breath, then louder, "So, are you in or are you going to stand there and critique my plans all night?"

"What's life without a little danger?" Damon said, his blue eyes twinkling with mischief, "I'm in. But if we get caught, I’m blaming you."

"Deal," Y/N said with a grin, "And when it works, you owe me dinner."

Damon smirked, a playful glint in his eyes, "Fine. But when it fails, you're buying the drinks."

"You're on, Salvatore," Y/N said, turning towards the door, "Let's go be fabulous."

As they walked out, Damon couldn't help but feel a thrill of excitement. Y/N's plans might be a mess, but they were never boring. And deep down, he knew he wouldn’t want it any other way.

Their bond had grown over the years, ever since the Salvatore brothers moved to Mystic Falls. Damon had taken an immediate liking to Y/N’s fearless attitude and quick wit. She was the only one who could match his sarcasm and keep up with his schemes.

As they approached Klaus's mansion, Y/N whispered, "Remember the time we tricked Stefan into thinking the house was haunted?"

Damon chuckled, "How could I forget? He almost staked me."

Y/N grinned, "Good times. Let's make another memory tonight."

Damon nodded, his smirk fading into a serious expression, "Stay close, Y/N. I can't afford to lose my favorite Gilbert twin."

Y/N rolled her eyes but smiled, "I’ll be right behind you, Damon. Let’s show Klaus what fabulous really looks like."

___________________________________________________

Damon and Y/N crouched behind a row of bushes just outside Klaus’s mansion. The moon cast a pale light over the sprawling estate, adding an eerie glow to the surroundings.

Damon: "Alright, we need to be quiet and stealthy. Got it?"

Y/N: "Of course. Quiet and stealthy. My middle names."

Damon raised an eyebrow, "Your middle names are Marie Elizabeth."

Y/N huffed, "Details. Let’s focus."

They sneaked around to the side of the mansion, where Damon had spotted an open window earlier.

Y/N: "Boost me up.

Damon interlaced his fingers to give her a lift. As she climbed up, her foot slipped, and she ended up kicking Damon in the face.

"Ow! Watch where you’re aiming those!"

"Sorry! It’s dark!"

She managed to get through the window and reached down to help pull Damon up. As she helped him climb, Y/N knocked over a vase, which shattered loudly on the floor.

Damon: "Quiet and stealthy, huh?"

Y/N: "I’m doing my best!"

They tiptoed through the dimly lit hallway, trying to avoid any more mishaps. Suddenly, they heard footsteps approaching.

Y/N: "Hide!"

They dove into a closet, cramming themselves into the small space. Y/N tried to hold back a giggle as Damon’s elbow poked her in the ribs.

Damon: "What’s so funny?"

Y/N: "Nothing. Just thinking about how cozy this is."

Damon rolled his eyes, "Focus, Y/N."

The footsteps passed, and they slipped out of the closet, continuing their mission. They reached Klaus’s study, where the moonstone was supposedly kept.

Y/N: "Alright, how do we get in?"

Damon: "I’ve got this."

He pulled out a set of lock-picking tools and started working on the lock. Just as he was about to succeed, the door swung open, revealing Rebekah.

Rebekah: "What are you two doing here?"

Y/N: "Uh... surprise inspection?"

Rebekah’s eyes narrowed, "Really? At this hour?"

Damon: "It’s a 24-hour service. Very thorough."

Rebekah crossed her arms, "You two are unbelievable."

Just then, a loud crash echoed from downstairs, followed by a chorus of chickens clucking.

Y/N: "Chickens? In Klaus’s mansion?"

Damon: "Weird. Let’s roll with it."

Y/N: "Quick, we need a distraction."

Damon: "On it."

He grabbed a nearby bust and tossed it out the window, triggering an alarm. Rebekah turned to look, giving Y/N just enough time to slip into the study and grab the moonstone.

Y/N: "Got it!"

Damon: "Time to go!"

They bolted for the exit, but not before Rebekah caught on and started chasing them, "You’re not getting away that easily!"

They sprinted through the hallways, dodging more clucking chickens and slipping on feathers. As they reached the front door, Klaus himself appeared, blocking their path.

Klaus: "Leaving so soon?"

Y/N: "Uh, Damon? Plan G?"

Damon: "Plan G. Got it."

Klaus: "What’s Plan G?"

Damon smirked, "It’s for Getaway."

With that, he grabbed a fire extinguisher from the wall and sprayed it in Klaus’s face, creating a cloud of foam. They dashed past him and out the door, laughing as they went.

Damon: "I can’t believe that worked!"

Y/N: "Told you it was fabulous."

As they ran down the driveway, Damon held up the moonstone triumphantly, "We did it!"

Y/N grinned, "And you owe me dinner."

"Fine..." Damon gruffs.

Their escapade might have been chaotic, but it was also one they’d never forget.

[sixty-silver-wishes]

Original Short Story: "I Taught Her Everything She Knows"

This short story is inspired by the writing style of Shirley Jackson, but is entirely my own.

-

It was a bright, lazy afternoon, with a cool breeze blowing through the garden and a sky blue enough to drown in. Bumblebees hovered idly overhead, their faint buzzing accompanied by the clinking of glasses as Mrs. Daniels and Mrs. Oliver sipped their sweet tea, sweat beading on their brows as the cubes of ice in their tea slowly melted into honey-brown oblivion.

“I’m glad Sarah decided to join dance class,” Mrs. Oliver said, leaning back in her rocking chair with the white paint chipping off the armrests.

Mrs. Daniels smiled. “She’ll be so excited to start next Monday,” she responded. “As soon as she heard Gloria was taking dance, she wanted to join, herself. It’ll be nice for her to finally make friends.”

Mrs. Oliver narrowed her eyes. “Gloria?”

“Oh, no,” Mrs. Daniels cut in hurriedly, condensation from her glass slipping onto her fingers. “I mean Sarah. It’ll be good to get her off the iPad, I suppose.”

Mrs. Oliver nodded sensibly. “She’ll have to work hard to keep up with the other girls,” she said. “Especially if she wants to get into the same class as Gloria. She has classes for three hours a day, except for on weekends and holidays, and she practices at home with me. I used to be on the dance team when I was in college, you know.”

“I see,” Mrs. Daniels said, and sipped her tea thoughtfully. “Well, Sarah could use more exercise. It’ll be good for her.”

As she leaned back in her chair, Mrs. Oliver took out her phone, tapping at it for a few minutes before slipping it back into her pocket. Mrs. Daniels waited patiently, pretending not to notice.

“I’m sorry,” Mrs. Oliver said. “That was Sandy Nelson. We’ve been trying to arrange a playdate for Gloria and Nicole. Does Sarah talk to Nicole Nelson?”

Mrs. Daniels nodded, her lips pursed. “I’ve heard plenty about Nicole,” she said. 

“Well,” Mrs. Oliver said, “Sandy is on the PTA. And Nicole seems like a nice girl.”

“It’s always the ones who seem nice,” Mrs. Daniels replied.

As Mrs. Oliver was working out a response, Sarah came running up from the garden to the front porch where the two older women were sitting. A half-dressed Barbie doll dangled from one of her hands, two circles of dirt on her knobby knees. She noticed Mrs. Oliver, and shuffled her sneakers on the ground, clutching the doll in her hand.

“Did you finish planting the flowers?” Mrs. Daniels asked her.

Sarah nodded. “Do you want to see?”

“I bet they’re very pretty,” Mrs. Daniels responded. “I’ll take a look once I’m done talking to Gloria’s mommy, okay?”

“Why don’t you run inside and rinse off the dirt from your hands?” Mrs. Oliver suggested. “It’s gotten all over your dress, too.”

Mrs. Daniels looked at her, then at Sarah. 

“Gloria always washes up after playing outside,” Mrs. Oliver continued. “And she’s nice and neat, so she never gets dirt on her clothes.”

“It’s okay, Sarah,” Mrs. Daniels cut in. “I can wash your dress later.”

Sarah didn’t seem to hear her, and tilted her head, swinging the Barbie doll back and forth. “Gloria spilled paint on her shirt at art class yesterday,” she said. “And she cried.”

Mrs. Oliver blinked. “She didn’t have any paint on her shirt when she came home,” she said.

Sarah nodded affirmatively. “But it’s true,” she continued. “She cried a lot, and Mrs. Q the art teacher thought she got hurt. But it was just paint, so she helped her wash it off.”

“If you go inside and wash your hands now,” Mrs. Daniels said, “I’ll make you lemonade, and you can have a cookie.”

“Can Gloria come over for cookies, too?” Sarah asked. “My mommy made lots of them a few days ago. I helped mix in the chocolate chips.”

Mrs. Oliver smiled, showing her whitened teeth. “Gloria has dance class today,” she said. 

“Oh, yeah,” Sarah answered, “But she can come over before class, right? I think she’d really like a cookie. I brought one to lunch, and she wanted to trade her granola bar and an apple and her carrot sticks for it. I said no, because it was my cookie, but I felt bad because she really really wanted it. But she can have one if she comes to my house.”

“If you’re okay with it,” Mrs. Daniels put in. “Or you can take some home if she can’t come.”

“Gloria has a dance recital coming up,” Mrs. Oliver said.

Sarah blinked. “But can we give her a cookie?”

“You can’t have too many cookies if you take dance classes,” Mrs. Oliver answered matter-of-factly.

“Oh,” Sarah answered.

“But maybe every once in a while,” Mrs. Daniels tried to add. “It won’t hurt. Now, Sarah, please go inside. I want you to wash up.”

Sarah nodded, heading up to the porch.

“Maybe you can visit Gloria this weekend instead,” Mrs. Oliver said. “She’s having a playdate with Nicole Nelson; you can come over if it’s okay with your mom.”

“Gloria’s always welcome here,” Mrs. Daniels said defensively.

Sarah paused, wrinkling her nose. “I hate Nicole Nelson,” she said, demonstratively shaking the Barbie doll in her fist.

“Hate’s not a very nice word,” Mrs. Oliver scolded.

“Gloria taught it to me,” Sarah said proudly. “She hates Nicole Nelson, too.”

“You shouldn’t say hate,” Mrs. Oliver said. “It’s a strong word, and not one that nice girls use.”

“Nicole’s not a nice girl,” Sarah answered. “She called Gloria a baby because she’s never seen Spongebob Squarepants, and everyone else at school knows Spongebob. Have you heard of Spongebob?”

“Spongebob will rot your brain,” Mrs. Oliver said. 

“But my mommy lets me watch Spongebob,” Sarah said, and began to sing. “Who lives in a pineapple under the sea…”

Mrs. Daniels laughed nervously. “Only after she’s finished her homework,” she said. “And her chores.”

Mrs. Oliver watched the Barbie doll swing about in Sarah’s hand, its hair coated in dirt and Magic Marker scribbles on its plastic face. Spittle formed at the corners of Sarah’s chapped lips as she kept singing that stupid Spongebob song in an obnoxious off-key warble, the gaps between her crooked baby teeth showing as she screamed the titular character’s name by the end at the top of her lungs. Grime caked the undersides of her fingernails, and the April sun was already beginning to burn the tip of her nose a bright strawberry red. As soon as Mrs. Oliver left, she knew, Sarah would be shoving her chubby cheeks full of homemade chocolate chip cookies, and play iPad games with those filthy grub-shaped fingers, and watch Spongebob Squarepants until her eyes glazed over and her little brain turned to mush and leaked out her ears in gray-pink clumps. And Mrs. Daniels, her selfish mother, would let her, baking more and more cookies and blaring more and more insipid TV shows and teaching her more and more words like hate.

If there was one consolation, Mrs. Oliver told herself as she smiled at the awful child, it was that there was no way Sarah would ever be able to join Gloria’s dance class.

[concealeddarkness13]

All's Fair Revamped Powerpoint!

Content warning for mentions of death and abuse. Yes, I have made a Powerpoint for this now-monstrosity of a story. Please see this post and this post for more info. This is gonna be long. Tagging: @maple-writes, @pen-of-roses, @drabbleitout, and @grailfish, also @mr-orion!

[Image Description: A page titled: All's Fair in Love and War (Especially When It's Both)

AKA: I'm revamping All's Fair and merging some of my stories because it's fun. End Description]

[Image Description: A page titled: Overview

So, this has changed a lot

It’s now a cyberpunk story!

Lots of lore

Unsure where to start, lol

This world was dying in the past, and the Celestials had gone to save humans from another world that was dying

The original humans of this world took matters into their own hands, and even though they did not have a seed of Primary like other worlds, they took their source of life and somehow brought a chunk of land up into space, making an artificial moon

This becomes the world of Bring Me That Horizon

The Celestials come back to a dead world, but they brought humans and their seed of Primary with them, so they settled on the planet

The seed of Primary is not able to fully revive this world, and the humans are using the seed as an energy source as well, so there’s just a little pocket of an empire that controls all the resources while the rest of the world is basically dead

The other species are pissed at the Celestials and the original humans for abandoning them, and they had to change into parasites to even find anything to feed on

Both the other species and humans are rich and control what goes on in the empire; the humans have their religion that worships the Celestials though, and the species want to fight the Celestials

Everyone also keeps talking about the “paradise” of the artificial moon, and the emperor has figured out how to bring it back down to the main planet. End Description]

[Image Description: A page titled: The Species

A little bit different from the original

The original humans: being up on the artificial moon with none of the other species for a long ass time, emphasized their predator-like qualities; they have slit pupils and more carnivorous teeth, and their diets are a lot more carnivorous too; they can eat plants, but they don’t do much for them

The new humans: have more prey-like qualities; they tend to stay in groups and don’t like to be alone, they have pointed ears that help them hear better, and they have an easier time telling when the other species are pretending to be human

The Shades: we’ve done this song and dance so often, everyone knows what the Shades are, lol; parasitic shapeshifters that feed off of human emotions and can control one person if they can see them

The Faeries: a combination of the Snakes and the shadow species I had made; they feed on human blood, and they have snake scales over their skin, fangs, slit pupils, and tails; if their prey is within a certain distance of them, they can give the prey an order, and they have to follow it

The Venus Girdles (temporary name): they are mostly the same, feeding off of human souls with hair that looks like Venus Girdle jellyfish; they tend to keep to themselves outside the empire, stealing humans to feed on. End Description]

[Image Description: A page titled: The Empire

Formed up once the humans came with a new energy source

The wealthy and influential of the species and humans joined together and made the empire to hoard resources and make people dependent on them; they also include companies that make prosthetics and androids

The rich humans all worship the Celestials

Most of the rich of the other species hate the Celestials

There’s a poor area where most of the citizens live and are demonized, and I’m calling it the undercity right now, but the name most likely will change, lol

They have cops and controlled soldiers through chips in their brains (victims of the prosthetics experiments) to “keep the peace”, which means that they terrorize the undercity, and everyone thinks that anyone who has the prosthetics from the experiments is a soldier, and they see the victims as less than human and monsters. End Description]

[Image Description: A page titled: The magic

We still have the prosthetics experiments, but in a different context!

The elemental magic works basically the same as before, with both pros and cons, at least to begin with

There’s also the crystal magic from Bring Me That Horizon, where the person who has this magic glows and can turn liquids into crystals that are stronger than diamonds, and that they can control; the Shades on the artificial moon have control of it at the moment

There’s also the Celestial magic a person can get if they are the child of a Celestial, where they can turn into a dragon, anticipate what their opponent will do, and have light and lightning magic

There’s also this opposite magic that comes from a spoiler, where a person can turn into a phoenix, anticipate what their opponent will do, and have darkness and black fire magic

Guess who has those first three? End Description]

[Image Description: A page titled: The Rebellion

Instead of the peaceful vs. violence movement, we have the rebellion

The religion preaches absolute peace, even ignoring and not helping the victims of violent crimes

The rebellion wants to fight against the empire and also has a distrust of the religion

The prosthetics experiments do come from this now, but there’s someone who’s using it for other plans

Thorne, Jude, and Irina are part of the rebellion at the start of the story

The rebellion is desperately looking for a symbol of the rebellion, and who better but a “reformed soldier”? End Description]

[Image Description: A page titled: Characters

Holy shit, there will be a lot

I have merged four stories because I want to suffer

But I love them all, and I do have a plan to at least start this story with all of the POV characters being at the same party, so they’re at least linked, lol

I will first talk about the four POV characters. End Description]

[Image Description: A page titled: Chess

The woman, the myth, the legend

She is my blorbo that I will never shut up about

I have given her all of the trauma

So, her real name is Ezra, and she was actually from the artificial moon and put through the Shades’ training (torture) to receive the crystal magic

So, her parents are actually alive for once!!!

But then Churi, the lead Shade, knew that Aeflin was looking for a weapon, and he thought Chess would be perfect for that, so he sent her there

There will be more about the prosthetics experiments in Naivi and Aeflin’s entries, but long story short, Chess got the Celestial magic and her fire magic, and she was sent to fight and kill some people, and she got epilepsy, and her chip broke, and she lost her memory

Then Ashont was horrible to her for a while, longer than in her original backstory

And now, she’s on the streets, getting abused by so many people, and just trying to survive

She has an awesome style, especially wearing a muzzle and a badass coat

Her hair is still super long and curly, but she has shaved the right side of her head

Still super traumatized about sex and trusting people and having any kind of happiness whatsoever

A black cat she named Mush does follow her around, and they have become very close

She is super overpowered, even if she doesn’t know it at the beginning of the story, but she deserves it

Sassy and flirty and loves stealing, she also has super low self esteem and thinks she probably is a monster.

“Baby don’t forget my name when the morning breaks us. Baby please don’t look away when the morning breaks us.” Bittersweet by Ellie Goulding

“Oh darling get me drunk and make me feel.” I Want to Live by Borislav Slavov

“I’ve been digging up every constellation, travelling galaxies without a station, faithful to my made up mission. I never felt like enough.” One by Kerli. End Description]

[Image Description: A page titled: Vesper

She is part of the Celestial religion and does try to convince people to be peaceful

She advocates for ignoring the victims of violent crimes because the religion believes only when humans are fully peaceful will the Celestials come back to live with and rule over the humans

She is also the religion’s liaison with the other species, and she especially works with Maisa

He is an asshole, but she endures him because she thinks it is vital for her to do whatever to keep good relations with the other species

She is very smart book-wise, but doesn’t really have street smarts

She’s totally autistic

She will learn to grow and challenge her beliefs throughout the story

I love her

Because Chess’s parents are alive, her parents have been killed (joking, there’s a narrative reason for them being dead in this one). End Description]

[Image Description: A page titled: Irina

Hers is the most personal story with the least amount of worldwide calamity potential

Basically, she’s the daughter of the CEOs of an android company, and she has always thought of androids as people, so she’s been kind to them

Her parents hate that

She finally ran away from them five years ago, with her dog, Briar

But Briar got sick, and in desperation, Irina paid for her memories to be transferred into an android version of her dog, so she has android Briar now

But the company she got Briar from is her parents’ company, and even though she fully paid for Briar, after two years, the company is trying to take Briar back

They send an android named Vortex to take Briar back, but Vortex decides to find some loopholes to stop himself from actually taking Briar

Her parents are gonna get pissed about that too

When she ran away, Irina met Thorne and Jude and became part of the demon trio

They are all three hellions, and I love it

She is a little concerned with the leadership of the rebellion, having seen Aeflin there, and she knows Aeflin is a well-known scientist who’s working with leaders in the empire

I can assure you that Irina and Briar are gonna make it and have a happy ending. End Description]

[Image Description: A page titled: Eclipse

Yes, the Celestial Story is the one that I haven’t talked about merging with All’s Fair yet

Surprise!

Eclipse is from the artificial moon, and their parents were killed, and they were captured by the emperor

They don’t know they have a Celestial parent and have Celestial powers

They’re proper but internally sassy, lol

I love them

A lot of their beginning story will stay the same; the party that everyone will be at in the beginning of the story will be a celebration of capturing Eclipse and bringing the paradise back down so “everyone” can use its resources

They want to kill the emperor and empress

The emperor wants them for their magic, and he also wants to learn more about the secret as to how they remained a paradise, but Eclipse is not even sure. End Description]

[Image Description: A page titled: Creed

Half Shade, half human

Genderfluid, enjoying he/him, they/them, and she/her pronouns at different times (I’ll just use they/them for this slide, to not be overly confusing)

They were picked up off the streets of the undercity and adopted by a rich couple as part of a program that was out to “prove” that anyone can make it in the empire

They have been an overall nuisance ever since

They meet Chess at the party and go make out with her and have sex with her, and they cause a scandal

Which also turns the eyes of the rebellion on Chess to use her as the new face of the rebellion even though that’s the last thing she wants

As an apology, they decide to stick with Chess and help her out

Don’t know much about them for this version of the story yet, but they’re fun. End Description]

[Image Description: A page titled: Thorne

One of the demon trio

He is a little asshole with Jude, with Irina being slightly more diplomatic but still an asshole

He despises the empire and the Celestials

His parents were the controlled soldiers, and they were hurt and thrown into the undercity for having him

There, they were abused and died, and Thorne blames the empire and the religion for it, since he knows the other people in the undercity are just trying to survive too

He likes waxing poetic at times

He’s more outwardly serious than Jude and Irina, but he likes getting into shenanigans with them

His assignment with Jude at the beginning of the story is to capture Vesper

He still captures her with Jude by dancing with her until she’s exhausted. End Description]

[Image description: A page titled: Jude

Also a little shit

He came from a wealthy family, but when he met Thorne when he tried to steal from Jude’s family, Jude decided to become friends and help Thorne, eventually culminating with running away from his parents and joining the rebellion with Thorne

He is super flashy in both his looks and his speech

He loves making jokes about every situation. End Description]

[Image Description: A page titled: Vortex

My boy, he must be protected

He first started out as a pleasure android, but when he killed his owner after being abused, he ran to the undercity and almost got hurt, but Chess saved him

He now follows Chess around like a puppy when he can

It takes a lot for him to get a crush on anyone, but he totally will at least fall in love with Irina and Chess in this story

He’s extremely serious and insists that he isn’t a person

He also named himself Vortex because it sounded cool

Once he is sent to bring Briar back, he checks to see if Irina had been abusing Briar, and when he realizes that she hasn’t and actually loves Briar very much, he finds loopholes so he doesn’t actually take Briar back

He still has to pursue Irina though, but she knows that, he makes it clear to her that he has to

Which is how he falls in love with Irina, by being there for her and helping her keep Briar away from the company and her parents

They will go through some shit, but it’ll be interesting, and Vortex might just finally acknowledge that he’s a person at some point. End Description]

[Image Description: A page titled: Ashira

She prefers to go by Ash

She’s a Faerie and the emperor’s daughter

Eclipse is forced to marry her, and they both want to use the other, and they both think it’ll be a loveless marriage

Lol, JK

They fall in love, especially after Ash tells Eclipse that she wants to kill her parents too

She has been abused by her parents and led to believe that the only way she’ll get anything from anyone is to manipulate them

She is very cynical about the world, but her relationship with Eclipse will help her heal

She’s manipulative and a jerk, and I love her. End Description]

[Image Description: A page titled: Nesri

She’s from the artificial moon, and she received the crystal magic from the Shades around the same time as Chess

So, she knew Chess as Ezra and they were best friends

Unfortunately, Chess doesn’t remember Nesri anymore

When the artificial moon is brought back to the planet, the pirate crew she’s part of will totally be fighting the empire

She escaped from the Shades and joined the pirates and has never looked back

Her new pirate family is helping her heal from the trauma

She adores fighting, and will do anything for her captain Triel, especially. End Description]

[Image Description: A page titled: Triel

The other woman, the myth, the legend, lol

She always must be seen with her wide brimmed hat and long ass coat

I love her so much

Chaotic chaotic

She is a super competent captain who is always two steps ahead of everyone else

And she absolutely knows about Chess from Nesri and wants to help her

She sees the artificial moon being brought to the planet as a perfect opportunity to do so

She will destroy you with her words first and then send Nesri to destroy you physically

Always smirking. End Description]

[Image Description: A page titled: Shine

They are deaf and the best engineer

Holy fuck, I just realized that Shine and Naivi can actually meet, hell yeah

They’re the engineer of Triel’s crew, and they are the best

Super sassy, they love to insult people in sign language

The whole crew knows their sign language, so they mostly communicate in sign for Shine

Oh shit, I just realized that I really will need five POVs (with Nesri) because this storyline will be super important too, damn

Back on track: they have a small dragon named Mina, who responds to sign language

They don’t let anyone else in the engineering room, and they have an iconic sign to keep people out, especially Nesri, lol. End Description]

[Image Description: A page titled: Naivi

Yeehaw, the enemies to lovers is still strong!

But different!

So! Naivi is half Venus Girdle half human, and she escaped from their city where they treat humans like pets

It was all really bad

But she gets to the empire, and she’s demonized by everyone, she learns to hide her non-human features, and she learns to hate the religion even more

She hates the Celestials and thinks that they are horrible gods and should be killed for how they let this world get so bad, that if they’re killed, humans will stop waiting for them to come

She devises the prosthetics experiments to make an army to fight the empire and the Celestials

One problem: Aeflin takes interest and “helps” her

Which means Aeflin takes away the victims and sends them off to be controlled soldiers which will be doing the exact opposite of what Naivi wants

She realizes this and makes a secret army without Aeflin knowing

Except, JK! She does, and she sends her own weapon, Chess, to devastate Naivi’s army (this is where Chess loses her memory and gets her epilepsy)

Chess does destroy Naivi’s army, but that just makes Naivi want to use her instead as a one-person army

Not sure how, but Naivi doesn’t know where Chess went, so she’s searching for her, and it’s when the rebellion decides to use her as their face of the rebellion, that Naivi finds where Chess is again

Which means she can totally start manipulating Chess into fighting the Celestials first and then the empire

This will turn into enemies to lovers, but there will be some fun stuff first of course

Naivi is honestly so obsessed with her own idea of justice that she’ll hurt any and everyone to get what she wants

At least until it’s the person that she has a crush on who almost dies, then she starts rethinking everything, yeesh. End Description]

[Image Description: A page titled: Aeflin

The epitome of being a mad scientist trope

She’s a Shade who really just wants to be evil for the science reasons

Wants a weapon who will kill a Celestial so she can dissect said Celestial

She actually doesn’t care about any of the politics of the other antagonists, she just wants to do science, is that so wrong?

She’s tortured and killed and ruined so many people for science

All with a smile and a bubbly personality

I love to hate her. End Description]

[Image Description: A page titled: Maisa

The asshole Shade who wants to be evil for politics reasons

He despises the Celestials and wants to kill all of them

For different, but actually similar reasons, than Naivi

He’s also super horny, in an asshole way

Has tormented Vesper all for his game

He sees humans as pawns in the Celestial’s game, and thinks that he’s equal to the Celestials (just realizing this), so he sees humans as pawns for himself too

Lots of fun. End Description]

[Image Description: A page titled: Ashont

Ass-ont, am I right?

He’s the only straight character in this whole story, lol

And he’s awful about it

He’s the first person Chess meets after losing her memory, and it’s not a coincidence

He abuses her and calls her a monster and tries to hold onto her, but she finally gets to escape

She actually hurts him before she escapes, and which scarred his face

He is now even more obsessed with Chess and wants to capture her again because he’s a creep

I hate him so damn much, don’t even love to hate him. End Description]

[Image Description: A page titled: Ares

My child, she is the best ever

But she technically will be an antagonist for most of the story, so she needs to stay in the antagonists

An 18 year old who had her life ripped from her when the artificial moon was brought down to the planet

When the emperor sent soldiers to kill Eclipse’s parents and capture Eclipse, they devastated the city around the palace

The soldiers killed Ares’s parents while she was hiding but hearing their screams, and when she left her hiding place, she found that everyone else she cared about was killed too

She blames Eclipse and their parents, and she decides she wants to kill them

She stumbles upon Triel’s crew, and she’s part of the big lore reveals, and she gets the phoenix magic in order to kill Eclipse

She’s so angry and so valid

She has all the righteous anger of a teenager fighting a god

She won’t remain an antagonist, but she’s tons of fun. End Description]

[shyflameweasel]

If Freakazoid ever got a reboot it should definitely do something similar to what Animaniacs did with them catching up on the lost time.

It opening with Dexter Dougles, now an adult, doing his own thing at like a dead end cubicle with him typing away on a computer. Freakazoid himself having 'gone offline' in a sense not too long after the original show ended so Dexter hasn't heard anything from his superhero counterpart for years. ("No show? Whelp guess I'm gonna take a nap. Wake me up when they get revived via fans convincing Mr. Speilburg to give us another go.")

The episode continues to show how a day in his adult life goes and how similar it is to his teenage years. Things pick up as finally the man goes home after a seemingly horrible day. Right before he goes to bed he hears a "Update Complete" in one of those text to speech voices. Dexter jolting up in bed wondering where the hel- and reminiscent to the origin story episode unzips Dexter's head and says something along the lines of "Ah ah ah, little ears are listening."

Freakazoid's back! ...and now fully updated (since he was originally a glitch made from a experimental chip so why not have him work more along the lines of a living program?) with an updated internet database of everything from 1997 to modern time.

The show continuing with Dexter trying to go through the series balancing his work life and personal life with now his unretired superhero life as a Freakazoid possessing the utter chaotic mess that is modern day internet in his brain.

[fictionkinfessions]

I’m very grateful to what happened in my canon. Being in a supporting role feels more right than the main antagonist role the games gave me. Mr. Ingram, as much as I hate him, even admitted so in his little fairy story that the reason I joined Providence was to make the world a better place. And I wouldn’t have fallen under that corporate shell of a capitalistic amoral hellscape when my mentor was Janus. I don’t really understand my appearance in the games a lot. He just went corrupted with the want of power. He terrifies me.

My idea with the Destiny Group I wanted to create was so all the corporations under Providence’s control would no longer be invincible. They had to deal with fallouts, damages. People could get reparations. At the same time everyone at Providence still keeps their jobs. Idealistic, maybe, but at least I made it work.

I thought the Partners would give me a chance, but of course they didn’t, the classist elitists. And I must admit that my time as Constant did change me. I did lose my way, my original purpose for joining, why I wanted that power. But it was only after the… whole poison chip incident that I finally remembered what I wanted. I remembered myself.

Ironically I have to thank Mr. Ingram, Mr. Stuyvesant and Mrs. Carlisle for how they treated me, because for them it engineered their downfalls. I wonder if Mrs. Carlisle saw me as just a secretary still when all was said and done.

— Arthur Edwards (Hitman) #📺🎙💥

x

[captain-crowfish]

Happy CubeGoblins Day to those who Celebrate

I was going to animate a meme to celebrate but the software I was using suddenly said "No❤" And wiped the project.

So instead, here are 9 random things I've learned about The Boxtrolls production history within the last few years or so.

G-get it? Because it's been 9 years since the movie released.

1

it was originally going to be a Dreamworks film.

"'What Phil really values is a good story,” says Fiona Kenshole, the excitable Brit who Knight hired as director of worldwide scouting operations for Laika. Kenshole, a former children’s literature editor and publisher, is in charge of finding the best stories for future Laika movies. She scored a coup this spring by beating out DreamWorks for rights to the book Here Be Monsters. She finagled the deal by promising the author, Alan Snow, that Laika directors would stay true to his vision and that she’d throw in a pair of Nikes for his son." Source Article

This fact really intrigues me even though I know it wouldn't nearly be as dark and gritty if it ended up being made by Dreamworks. Also, "True to his vision"? Yea, that didn't happen. Sorry.

2

This film has really cool set design

Image source (There's more!)

3

(At least) Three storyboard sequences made for a very early version of the film are available online One Two Three

4

Mr. Pickles has tattoos on his knuckles

╳△⚲↑ It's been years and I still don't know what this means

5

There were about 15 Snatcher puppets made for the film. At least one of them didn't even have legs.

6

back on the subject of Storyboards, The scene in the movie where The Boxtrolls get crushed is a little bit different in the novelization, and also longer. It seems however, that perhaps the book was finalized before the film was, as Storyboards exist of the same scene, with beats and dialogue that are nowhere in the final film. (It shows Mr. Gristle shoving the fake Boxtroll head onto Eggs' head and the Mecha-Drill exiting the factory workshop.) Here it is!!!

7

There were originally 7 red hats

The two left-most guys are called Chips and Knuckles.

image source

8

Some countries built Boxtroll-themed play-places in malls as part of an advertising campaign.

I can no longer find the sources for any of these (There are more images, however)

9

And finally, my favorite fact. Remember the Cabbagehead creatures that were cut from the film sometime in production? Turns out they weren't cut early enough to stop any test animations from being made!

Video source Isn't that cool?!?!?! I'm gonna go eat some cheese now. Maybe even Coastal cheddar.

[thebibliomancer]

What If? Vol. 2 #6: What If… the X-Men Lost Inferno?

Well, nothing good!

It was a demonic invasion of New York powered by Summers family drama!

Mr Fantastic made up a BS story about AIM UFOs shooting insanity radiation at the populace because that’s more bearable than knowing that the world almost went to hell!

Inferno caused the Worst Avengers Roster! That’s how bad it was!

So what if things went even more badly? How would that play out?

Well, for one thing, Wolverine eats an unspecified number of babies.

In the original event, Illyana stopped Inferno by retconning her own backstory of being kidnapped and raised in Limbo.

This forced closed the baby-powered pentagram and sucked all the demons back to Limbo except boss demon N’astirh.

N’astirh had a side hustle going on with Scott’s angry clone wife Madelyne Pryor so he tries to get her to sacrifice baby Nathan to re-open the pentagram.

The X-Men show up and kill his ass and then Jean and Madelyne have a confrontation which ends with Jean getting a free baby.

But in this What If? when Illyana sends all the demons back to Limbo, other prominent demon S’ym lands right next to Illyana’s soulsword and uses it to go back to Earth and absorb N’astirh’s power when he dies.

He and Madelyne team up to kill the X-Men except for Wolverine, who S’ym takes as a pet.

And he feeds him babies.

This What If? leans into some edge. Because Inferno.

Dr Strange, the hero of this story, gathers a group of surviving mystics and other heroes and also Baron Mordo to try to find a way to undo Inferno.

(Dr Druid definitely shouldn’t be here. Right before Inferno he fell into a negative time wedgie because he was simping for Nebularavonna too hard.)

Strange is working on borrowed time.

Not only do demon raids keep chipping away at his group but the demonic takeover of Earth is eventually going to aggro the Living Tribunal who doesn’t have any reaction lower than overreaction.

To save anything of Earth, Strange needs to come up with a plan before the Living Tribunal shows up and blows it the fuck up.

He finally finds a bit of hope in a mannequin.

The mannequin is actually Rachel Phoenix Summers, transformed earlier in the event and not saved until now in this twisted timeline.

With Rachel, Dr Strange finally has a desperate plan. Truly desperate because the Living Tribunal is on their way NOW.

Strange wants to roll the dice on the Phoenix. Use Rachel’s connection to the cosmic bird and ask it to “purge” the demonic taint from Earth and hope the firebird doesn’t just burn the planet to a cinder.

This might kill anyone that’s been corrupted by the demons so Rachel isn’t so sure.

Unfortunately, Mordo did his sudden yet inevitable betrayal and S’ym, Madelyne, and various demons show up and kill Human Torch.

Dr Strange holds back the demons while Rachel begins communing with the Phoenix. But Madelyne tries to get the Phoenix to pay attention to her instead.

Mordo pulls a sudden yet inevitable two for one betrayal on both S’ym and Strange.

Kitty Pryde stops Wolverine from sneaking up on Strange and gets gutted.

James “Eats Babies” Howlett has a breakdown over this and declares that killing Kitty killed any remaining good he had left.

He kills Mordo and gets killed in turn. S’ym’s ghost takes over Wolverine’s skeleton and backstabs Madelyne just out of spite.

How the hell do Wolverine’s claws work if they go to his elbow when extended? Where do they go? How does he bend his arm?

Anyway, Strange tells Rachel to ignore Wolvers’ym and just focus on the Phoenix.

She do that and the Phoenix shows up and bathes the world in flames.

The Living Tribunal shows up, has a cosmic conversation with the Phoenix, and then basically peaces out “my work here is done” style.

As for Earth?

Well. Some kind of happy ending comes out of this.

The Phoenix did remove all the demonic influence from the world… and also wiped out modern civilization.

Humanity continues on. New babies are born.

Including a child of Johnny Storm and Alicia-

Hey, wait. She’s a Skrull.

I went into a bit more detail than I think I needed for this one.

It’s baffling.

It hits a weird balance of feeling edgy for the sake of edge and lacking Inferno’s edge.

Demon Wolverine gets slightly too much focus to be pointless but sightly too little to not feel wasted. He was definitely in the story mainly to slap on the cover.

Compared to some of the “and then things went horrible wrong” stories, this one at least wrings out a bittersweet ending.

The divergence point is really arbitrary. A real diabolus ex machina. But given what we’re dealing with, that’s kind of appropriate.

I dunno. Not my favorite What If? but it told more of a story than the Evolutionary War one.

I sat with the screenshots in my to-do pile too long and any strong feelings I felt about this story have leaked away.

So I guess I land on it is a story and it definitely occurred.

[inktober-of-a-fan-girl]

Day 4: Hans Conried

This is Walt Disney's Peter Pan from 1953, which is after World War 1. (It got shelved while the war happened which means it was in production before.) Walt Disney himself had an impact on how this version was portrayed with Captain Hook's Wikipedia page saying:

In the animated film Peter Pan, Hook is a far more comical villain than the original character: he is seen as a vain coward with a childish temper who is prone to crying out in terror. During the film's early development, the story department analyzed Hook's character as "a fop… Yet very mean, to the point of being murderous. This combination of traits should cause plenty of amusement whenever he talks or acts".

There are more notes & links in Keep reading.

Walt Disney's Peter Pan (released on 5 February 1953), an authorized animated adaptation. Disney licensed the film rights to the story in 1939 from Great Ormond Street Hospital for Children. It featured music by Sammy Cahn, Frank Churchill, Sammy Fain, and Ted Sears. 15-year-old film actor Bobby Driscoll supplied the voice of Peter, while Wendy was portrayed by Kathryn Beaumont, who previously portrayed Alice in Alice in Wonderland. Hook was portrayed by Hans Conried (who also played Mr. Darling), and Margaret Kerry did live-action references for Tinker Bell. This version contained little of the original dialogue from the play or its novelization.

(I noticed they updated the cover for the movie a while back.)

The story of what happened later on to the boy who voiced Peter Pan (Bobby Driscoll) is quite depressing but I will just let you read his Wikipedia:

This probably is why Peter Pan is portrayed the way he is in 2022’s Chip 'n Dale: Rescue Rangers.

As Chip & Dale find a middle-aged and overweight version of Peter Pan who became a crime boss after being fired due to his age, going by the name of Sweet Pete is played by Will Arnett.

Anyways....

Links for Captain Hook:

This version has the hook on his left hand and also with brown eyes (Yes, in the artwork I changed back to blue. Not the first person to do that on here.) But this version has his hair….and his mustache finally! I also love how they used the voice actor in a costume as a reference…it is so smart.

Here is the youtube link if you wanna watch it on Youtube….but it is also on Disney+.

Also here it is on Spotify!

[oldsalempost-blog]

The Old Salem Post

                   Our  Local Tamassee-Salem SC Area News each Monday except holidays                                          Contact: theoldsalempost@gmail.com                              Distributed to local businesses, town hall, library.                            Volume 7 Issue 37                                                                                                  Week of Sept 9,  2024                https://www.tumblr.com/settings/blog/oldsalempost-blog                                                         Lynne Martin Publishing EDITOR:  Healthy people seek healthy thoughts and habits.  As we age there is a normal decline in health because when Adam and Eve ate the forbidden fruit our DNA was changed forever.  Knowledge helps me work harder to have quality of life over quantity. I am appalled when I read of the health problems and risks with food additives such as FD&C Yellow and Red artificial food coloring.  These are cancer causing agents yet our foods and drinks are full of these unnecessarily. We are insane if we continue to ignore  what we are eating and what we are allowing our children to eat and drink.  Knowledge and action will help protect us when our government will not. Read labels!   Lynne R Martin                                                                         

TOWN of SALEM: 5 Park Avenue  Monday-Friday 8AM-5PM. Closed 12-1 for lunch.  * Visit the Downtown Market every Sat, 8am-12pm.  There will be a community cookout in partnership with the Oconee Sheriff’s office and the Town at the Salem Community Center Sept 17th at 4PM.  FREE Hamburger or hot dog plates will begin at 4PM.  A new neighborhood watch which is part of  Mission Oconee, sponsored by a Isaiah  40:31 foundation will be discussed.  

Jottings from Miz Jeannie  by Jeannie Barnwell    Stretching AND Chair Zumba at ENAC Ladies!  Join the fun this Thursday, September 12 at 9:30 AM for gentle but invigorating exercise. Last week, nine ladies attended a practice session under the leadership of Ms. Joanie Shockly.  Joanie explained that we would be moving at our individual pace, and we would not be competing. I mentioned to you last week that rather than driving to classes in Easley, that I intended to just stay at home to do my own stretching.  Well, that didn't work out very well for me.  I curled up on the porch and tucked into a  bag of chips and a  good book.  Mercy me!  The days went by and I just never did get around to my exercises.  On the contrary when I joined the group, there was a spirit of camaraderie. As I glanced around the room, many of the women were smiling  for the whole hour.  We look forward to attending weekly on Tuesdays and Thursdays  Classes are $2.50 each. Enter the ENAC and the exercise class is directly past the Auditorium,  This experience is the opposite of a high school gym class! No one will yell at you if you confuse your left foot from your right!  After class, I told Joanie I felt so energized from the breathing exercises and the gentle stretching. It's up to YOU to take advantage of amazing classes, concerts, and get-togethers planned JUST FOR YOU at the Eagles Nest ART Center!  I hope to see you in class! Love Ya!  Miz Jeannie

ACE HARDWARE RETURNS and IS OPEN for business!  A nice reader suggested this news is  so great I should run it again for everyone.  The Ace Hardware that formerly operated at the Keowee Towne Market Complex on North Highway 11 has reopened in its original building.  Hours are Monday –Saturday 7AM-7PM and Sunday 9AM-7PM.

ASHTON RECALLS by Ashton Hester      SALEM FACULTY NAMED FOR 1954-55 TERM - (The following story was in the August 4, 1954 Keowee Courier). . .The 1954-55 school term will open at Salem Monday, August 16, with classes beginning at 9 a.m., the Courier learned this week from Superintendent Beecher Morton. . .Superintendent Morton listed the faculty for the elementary grades as including Mrs. Alice C. Elrod of Walhalla, Mrs. Eloise Griffith of Salem, Mrs. Edith Evatt of Central, Mrs. Estelle Nicholson of Salem, Mrs. Della P. Burnside of Salem, Mrs. Hannah Light of Walhalla, and Mrs. Nellie Evans of Central. . .The high school faculty roster is composed of Mrs. C.G. Dalton of Salem, Mrs. Nelle Rochester of Salem, Mrs. Mary K. Whitten of Walhalla, Mrs. Dorothea Thode of Walhalla, Dee C. Poe of Salem, and Raymond Spoon of Salem. . .Advisory trustees are Clyde Talley, M.P. Childress, C.L. Lusk, Oscar Wigington, and Fred Holden.                                                                                                                                 JOCASSEE VALLEY BREWING COMPANY,(JVBC) & COFFEE SHOP* 13412 N Hwy 11                                           Wed–Sat 9am-9pm and Sunday 12pm-7pm.    Events this week: Wed:  FOOD TRUCK: BLUE RIDGE GRILL  4PM  Wings and more!    Thursday: Food Truck:  BLUE RIDGE GRILL 4PM   Music:  OLD TIME JAM  6:30PM   Fri: Music: Square Roots ( Blues Duo) 6:30PM   Food:   Mac Attack   Sat– Food: WHEELIE GOOD FOOD   Music:  FALL DOWN TREES ( Americana)  6:30PM   Sun: 12pm-7pm Food: WOK LOBSTER    Music at  4PM.

FRIENDS OF JOCASSSEE  FALL EVENT– Sept 14th 9AM-NOON  VIP DAY   Volunteer, Improve, and Protect.  This is the clean and sweep of areas.  We welcome divers, boaters, kayakers and more to help!  Come be a part of protecting and preserving this beautiful lake we all love and enjoy.   See friendsof jocassee.org for more information.              

EAGLES NEST ART CENTER 4 EAGLE LANE, SALEM SC     

2024 UPCOMING EVENTS       Treasure Store open every Saturday 9AM-12PM!  Drop off donations too!

Eagles Nest Senior Exercise Program:  Join up with friends to exercise at the Eagles Nest Art Center!  Classes begin Thursday, Sept 12 at 9:30AM and will be held  each Tuesday and Thursday mornings at 9:30AM with Stretching and walking geared for 55 plus.  Cost $2.50  each class you attend.                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                       September 21, 7PM  Oconee Mountain Opry– Hometown variety show of local and regional talent including Jenifer Gregory-from Upstate SC a-singer/songwriter and pop rock, Chris Wayne from NC -Rockabilly, and the Brown Mountain Lightning Bugs from Winston-Salem singing a variety of American you will absolutely enjoy!   Call up your friends and come along!   Tickets $10 at the door or Ticketleap on the eaglesnestartcenter.org website.   

TATER HOUSE– The little building on the corner of Tamassee Salem campus ( -.  The equipment was there and the citizens did all the preparation and process which resulted in rows of canned vegetables for the winters ahead.  Usually it took a full day or sometimes two for each family.  I remember going there vividly with my mom and other ladies as they visited and worked hard at the same time.  The men did all the harvesting and loading the vegetables into vehicles from the home front.  Franklin D. Roosevelt designed the funds to aid our community during our time of crucial need.  by Brenda DuBose, 2015    * Editor’s note:  Brenda DuBose is the daughter of Mr, and Mrs. Crawford Nicholson,  ( Mrs. Estelle Nicholson mentioned on pg 1, Ashton Recalls) and the Tater House is part of the Eagles Nest Art Center.)                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                   CHURCH NEWS

Bethel Presbyterian Church (PCUSA),  580 Bethel Church Rd Walhalla, 29691. Worship at 10:30 a.m.  Come Visit Us! September  Schedule: 1,8,&15 Mel Davis                                                                                                                                Boones Creek Baptist Church, 264 Boones Creek Road, Salem invites you to join us for regular worship service on Sunday morning with Sunday School at 10am and followed by worship at 11am.                                                                                                                               Salem Seventh-Day Adventist Church, located 240 W Main St , Salem,  cordially invites you to join us every Saturday at 9:30am

Salem Methodist Church, 520 Church Street, Down town Salem.  Salem Methodist is an independent church.       Sunday Breakfast at 9AM with Sunday School at 9:15AM and Worship Service at 10:30AM.   Holy Communion the first Sunday each month.  All welcomed!   Tune in to our live service on Facebook or view it later on our website.                              

NEW PRAYER GROUP: Salem Methodist Church. Will meet every second and fourth Thursday at 7PM each month.                                                                                  

HELP MAKE JUMPROPES from old T-Shirts– Come learn and participate in making jump ropes for the Samaritan’s Shoe Box Ministry Sept 14th at 10AM.  

THINK FOR YOUR HEALTH—  Be Positive!  Think good thoughts about yourself!  Think about healthy foods instead of unhealthy sweet and fatty foods.  Make conscious decisions about the choices you make.  Refuse to buy anymore foods with artificial colors, artificial flavors, and GMOs.   Start a habit of choosing fresh fruits and vegetables.   LRM                                                                                    Entertained by an Angel ! - A lady at my church shared this story:  Recently there was a huge rain storm when I arrived at the Dollar General in Salem.  I noticed a lady sitting in her car and I wondered if she were waiting to go in or waiting on someone.  After I checked out it was still storming and she got out of her car to hold an umbrella for me to get to my car.  I kept insisting I was fine.  She said “ I am here to save your life.”  With my resistance on her getting wet to help me, and with her insistence to help me, many moments passed. I finally allowed her to help me to my car.  Then as I was driving home…...a huge tree fell in front of me…..that would have landed right on my car!                                                                                                      HAPPY BIRTHDAY AUNT CAROL ANN!

Have a blessed week! LRM

[mrwxrldwide]

welcome to my blog !!

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Estelle | she/her | esfp-t

socials:

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wannabe pianist | artist | writer | yapper | brad pitt lover

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no homophobia, transphobia, racism, sexism or anything of the sort

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constructive criticism is welcome !!

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i can and will say no to things, i have that right

bad people are not welcome here

ROSSI SLANDER IS NOT APPRECIATED HERE !!!

info / requests:

my request do’s and don’t’s

original character stuff

Estelle is my online name, not my real one

requests are currently…closed !! i am not taking them until further notice. you can send them through, but just don’t expect them to be done for a long time

also new tag babes “estelle talks” “estelle the yapper” “estelle writes” “miss yapalot”

i also currently have one fic, so y’all should read it here

sample story here, will never be completed; so don’t get your hopes up

i have also made a few edits, and may make more !! here & here

tv shows: criminal minds, b99, hazbin hotel, helluva boss, house MD and more !!

movies: heathers, rush hour 2, batman and robin, mr & mrs smith, die hard, fight club, and many more !!

music: conan gray, frank ocean, ayesha erotica, kanye west, tyler, the creator, kendrick lamar, and much more !!

food: pizza, brownies, cookies, burritos, burgers, chips, chocolate

credits:

dividers: @saradika @saradika-graphics

header: photos are not mine, taken from Pinterest— but I made the collage on Canva by using a template

matching shit inspired by: pearlzier

[mochalate]

[1] new notification!

msby!atsumu x reader || w/c: 1.9k ft. questionable methods of contacting the paparazzi. [<- read intro][ch 2->]

Atsumu’s last elementary school report card— faithfully stored by his mother in a sturdy carton in her closet, along with her other important documents— has near perfect grades, and only one comment from his teacher. 

Atsumu chooses to deal with matters, both academic and personal, in an independent and determined manner.

By the time middle school was over, Atsumu hadn’t changed; but the comment sure had.

Atsumu prefers not to ask for assistance even if he is having trouble with his work. I would like to see him asking for help or clarification when required.

Then in highschool, he’d learned how to bite back his pride enough to earn an approving ‘Atsumu is an active participant in his learning’ by the end of his third year.

And now look at him, asking strangers online for help without a second thought. Old Mrs. Yamada from Yako Middle School would be so proud. 

Atsumu wonders how she’s doing. He idly types her name into the search bar, and immediately finds an obituary. 

He blinks at the pixelated picture of her sweet, smiling, deceased face; and tries to decide if he should take this as a portent regarding the consequences of asking for help, or as a reminder of the relentless march of time.

Time, which you and Osamu were spending together at this very moment.

Atsumu has to resist the urge to bang his head against one of the lockers. 

 He tries his best not to think about it; but it’s early afternoon, he’s done with practice, the last one in the locker room, and unfortunately, has far too much time to not only think about it, but vividly picture it too. It’s like a goddamn movie in his mind, complete with subtitles. 

(They’re hard coded in; because of course, he’s third wheeling so hard in this scenario, he had to resort to watching said movie on the shadiest of websites, battling the pop up ads telling him about the hot singles in his area— just to rub salt in the wound.)

It went like this: you and Osamu are baking a cake together. You tell Osamu he’s got flour on his face, giggling for some reason, and he asks where. So you point to your nose, and he smears some on your face with a grin. Barf. 

Oh Osamu, you’re so much more fun than Atsumu, you say, all doe-eyed. Your subtitles are pink. The sweetest thing I’m allowed to make him is sugarless raisin bran cookies.

Yer damn right about that, Osamu replies (looking right at the camera, deadpan), Let’s get married just so we can not invite him to the wedding.

Okay, maybe Osamu wouldn’t go that far. 

And maybe it wasn’t fair to hold the raisin bran cookies against you like that. He really did think they were chocolate chip; but in hindsight, it wouldn’t make much sense for his nutritionist to be giving those to him when he was supposed to be on a high-protein diet.

(Sue him, he thought you had enough of a soft spot for him to sneak him a treat.)

Atsumu sighs, and unlocks his phone again to pull up the post from last night. There are a few more replies— some calling it a fake story, a few asking for an update, and one person inexplicably telling him to go no contact with his brother. 

Ridiculous. The whole idea was ridiculous; and surely msbygirlie (bless her) would eventually see through his half-assed attempt at disguising who he was.

His index finger hovers over the delete button. 

And then his eyes land on that reply he’s been thinking about since last night. 

well you don't have to talk to either of them... you said someone took the original photo. maybe they're still stalking?? ask them what they think?

It was insane. He’d be adding fuel to a fire that was dying down. It would drive the publicist crazy. 

He wants to do it.

(Fuck, he’s going to do it.)

Atsumu Miya’s Guide to Finding and Trapping Your Local Paparazzi

Set a live trap in the location you expect your target to be.

“Shoyo,” Atsumu calls out, as he spots his wing spiker near the gymnasium exit, “ya free right now?” 

Hinata comes to a halt with a little hop, somehow still full of energy despite the full training session. “More or less. Why?” 

Why? Because Sakusa would scoff and walk away, stopping only to report his plan to Meian; and because Bokuto would accidentally blab and give him up, probably during a livestream. (She reprimanded them a lot, but really, it was him and Bokuto keeping the publicist employed.)

“I need yer help catching a pest. Want to take a walk with me?”

2. Bait the trap.

Atsumu stops abruptly at the crossroads. He snaps his head toward the convex mirror on the corner just in time to see a nondescript man, with a baseball cap pulled low over his face, ducking into the small general store just behind them. It’s quick— the doors are already propped open since it’s not quite warm enough to justify running the air conditioning.

Perfect.

Hinata nudges his elbow. “Why did we stop? Do you want something to drink?”

Atsumu takes a deep breath. “Do ya trust me, Shoyo?”

He looks perplexed at the question. It’s not an expression that’s often on Hinata’s face, so Atsumu takes a moment to appreciate the novelty.

Of course, it’s gone in a second; replaced with his natural enthusiasm. “Oh, did you want to practice at the park? I see, you wanted to bring me to a different environment because our rapport on the court was—”

Atsumu claps his hands over Hinata’s shoulders, lowering his voice. “If ya trust me, do exactly as I say. Go to the park. Got it? Do not follow me. Go straight to the park.”

“Aren’t you coming with—”

Atsumu fills his lungs with air, and firmly plants his feet on the ground. 

(A quick glance in the mirror at the man with the baseball cap. Still there. Good.)

Forgive me, Shoyo.

“GOOD LUCK ON THE DATE!” he says as loudly as he can, before it's shouting. 

Hinata goes red, sputtering. “Huh? Date?”

Atsumu claps his shoulders again, and gives him a subtle push. Hinata, still wide-eyed, stumbles along in the direction of the park, glancing back over his shoulder a few times. 

3. Wait.

Atsumu jogs the long way around the block to get to the park. 

It only takes five minutes of lurking behind a row of vending machines, and feeling a little sorry for Hinata who’s sort of nervously wringing his hands on a bench— he's the only other person in the park at this time on a school day— before the man in the baseball cap shows up. 

A camera is slung casually around his neck. The recording light is taped over. He’s so fixated on Hinata, he doesn’t notice Atsumu as he saunters up the path towards the machines.

(Which, all things considered, was quite surprising— Atsumu is not a small man.)

“Hey,” Atsumu says, once Baseball Cap is close enough. “Long time, huh? Two things. One, give me your camera. I know it's recording. And two, I have a few questions.”

4. Dispose of your paparazzi responsibly and ethically.

Fifteen minutes later, Atsumu is no closer to the truth; and is considerably more irritated.

“What am I supposed ta do with that?”

“Is he going to hit me?” Baseball Cap anxiously asks Hinata, “Can you hold my camera if he’s going to hit me?”

“Atsumu wouldn’t hurt anyone,” Hinata assures him. 

“I ain’t gonna hit ya, ya scrub! Don’t you go writin’ that up on yer damn blog next.” He pinches his nose, trying to calm himself. “I’m done with ya, go home. But wipe the memory card in front of me first.”

r/relationship_advice • 1 hour ago

u/fattytuna95

UPDATE: I want to ask out my twin brother's girlfriend.

I didn’t want to come back here again, but I don’t know what to do.

Like one of you suggested, I asked the guy who took the picture. You were right. He's been following them.

(Creepy as hell, to be honest, but he didn't seem like a bad dude. And he was pretty skinny. Guess being a privacy invading douche doesn't pay well. I think even my female colleague could take him down if she tried, so that's fine.)

What he told me is this: she stayed overnight at his place twice this week. 

Now I know what you're thinking. It's a lost cause. Pack it up and move along. Right? 

No.

Here's the thing— I was worried my brother was developing feelings for her, and I still am, but if they were already sleeping together he would have told me. There's something else going on here. I mean on top of the fake dating bullshit.

And for some reason, they're not telling me.

How do I find out what without telling them how I know?

↑ 65 ↓ •••

u/unicornpoodle • 4 minutes ago

wowww

dude, are you sure you want to keep going through with this? There's a lot of things you can unsee but walking in on your  brother fucking your crush is probably not one of them...

(and you're a twin to boot! You'd see exactly what could've been. Now that'll mess you up!)

↑ 15 ↓   •••

u/fattytuna95 • 4 minutes ago Shut up!!! I don't want to think about that!!!!!! ↑ 10 ↓   •••

u/guiltyassassin_ • 10 minutes ago

lol I was lowkey joking about asking the guy, didn't think you'd actually do it. good for you. but uh, I might be with poodle on this one. you don't want it to be true, sure. but maybe they just didn't tell you? so it wouldn't be awkward at work?

↑ 12 ↓   •••

u/fattytuna95 • 9 minutes ago I shared a womb with the guy. I'm sure. You're an only child, aren't you? ↑ 12 ↓   •••

u/msbygirlie_13 • 5 minutes ago

This is exciting!! I don't agree with everyone else, I think you should get to the bottom of it!!! Like atsumu said in his volleyball monhtly interview in june '21, the game isn't over until the ball falls to the floor!!!!! the ball is NOT on the floor yet!

maybe you should go over to your brother's apartment and see if there's any evidence.and you should just show up. don't give him any time to clean it. you can do that right???

↑ 12 ↓   •••

u/fattytuna95 • 5 minutes ago Hmm that could work actually. I've been there so much, I'll definitely notice if something's out of place. ↑ 10 ↓   •••

u/unicornpoodle • 3 minutes ago are you saying this because you believe in it, or because you want more update posts? this shit is going to be hilarious ↑ 5 ↓   •••

u/msbygirlie_13 • just now ofc I believe in everything atsumu says, omg!!! he's the best, fattytuna will agree with me. ↑ 1 ↓ •••

Osamu frowns at the cloudy night sky as he pulls the shutters down over Onigiri Miya's window. The moon is hidden, only a hazy hint behind the grey.

"Looks like rain," he comments, glancing over his shoulder. "Sorry I kept ya waitin'. We should've just done it another night."

Behind him, standing under the streetlight, you can already feel the tiny droplets drizzling on your face. But you shake your head. "I can just stay over again. We always end up losing track of time, and your place is closer to work than mine anyway."

The lock in Osamu's hand clatters against the corrugated metal. "Want ta move in and really sell it?"

You roll your eyes. "I would, but we're not a good match. We'd feed each other too much and end up gaining so much weight."

He chuckles. "Hey, at least I can appreciate raisin bran cookies. Ya won't catch me spittin' food outta my mouth."

You laugh at that. It wasn't his fault, you want to say, smiling fondly at the memory. He didn't realise I was joking about it being chocolate chip.

"Hey, Osamu?"

"Yeah?"

"Should we just tell him?"

now what could they be up to? [my other fics->] please leave a like/reblog/reply/send me an ask if you enjoyed! <3 divider @/cafekitsune