#that wont stop peter “definitely not spiderman” parker

[mustasekittens]

catching harry up on what happened in the city since he's been gone

[mrsparker3696]

𝚙𝚎𝚝𝚎𝚛 𝚙𝚊𝚛𝚔𝚎𝚛 𝚡 𝚛𝚎𝚊𝚍𝚎𝚛- 𝚙𝚒𝚗𝚔 𝚘𝚛 𝚋𝚕𝚞𝚎 𝚏𝚛𝚘𝚜𝚛𝚒𝚗𝚐?

**********************************************

"It's gonna be ok may! Now leave!! Go have some fun!" You said, pushing her out of her own house.

May is leaving us for a whole month.

Her friends planed this big trip for like, years and she always had to reject the offer.

One time because of ben,

Then, because of you,

And last and definitely least, peter being Spiderman.

"Are you sure you guys gonna be ok without me?"

She looked at you worried.

You rolled your eyes and grinned at her, letting her know that we'll be just fine.

"Im gonna keep an eye on him, don't worry" i winked at her and looked at Peter's room.

He's still sleeping.

He got into this huge fight last night, and he came back home super late.

He was basically half dead, and exhausted that he fall asleep in the second he walked home.

I had to carry his heavy body to his bed and take care of him while his asleep.

Which is actually better.

Every time that peter need stitches or he have a deep cut, he wont stop whining.

So, the fact that he was asleep was a bless.

"Ok honey. Tell peter i said bye!! I love you!!" She said as she got into her cab.

You smiled at her and waved.

------

Around 13:30 peter woke up.

He sat next to you on the couch, still dozed from his sleep.

You smcak him on his hand.

"You missed may, dumbass!!"

But peter didn't looked worry or disappointed.

He just yawned.

"Too bad" he simply said.

"Oh well," he shrugged.

You gasped.

"PETER BENJAMIN PARKER" you stick your finger in his chest.

"Your aunt left for a month, and your cute little ass was asleep and you missed her! And all you've got to say is 'oh well'?!"

"You think my butt is cute?"

You glare at him, sending him a death stare. Not moving a muscle.

Peter looked at you and then burst out in laugh.

"Im joking! Im joking!! I said may goodbye last night when i got back home from patrolling" he said, smiling at your angry face.

"I hate you" you said, getting up from the couch and walking to the kitchen.

"You love me" you heard him scream from the leaving room.

Yes, i really do.

Peter and you were best friends since you can remember.

May and your mom were friends in highschool and staid in touch.

And one day, she told us her niece is moving in with her, and he's about your age.

After your parents died, she took you in.

Of course, you were planning to move out in the second you get.

Not because of may or peter.

You always had this dream- live in a house, next to the ocean or in the middle of the big city.

In the last couple year, when hormones and puberty got into the picture,

Peter wasn't your nerdy sweet best friend,

He was peter.

Especially in the last year...

Peter got bigger.

We used to be in the same high but now his a few inches taller then you.

And from skinny boy, who wore big glasses,

He turned to be a muscular boy,

And he didn't need his glasses anymore.

Which was disappointing because you loved them and how he looked in them.

But damn. He looked good.

At first, his shirts got smaller and tighter.

He looked like one of those jocks who's trying to impress the girls.

But peter wasn't like that...

In the second he got some money from work, he bought new clothes.

And now, he wore big shirts and sweatshirts.

He didn't used the fact that the whole Spiderman thing got him jacked to get girls.

But he definitely got you.

Like, harder then before.

And he used to walk around the house, shirtless after fights. And that's definitely didn't helped.

"So... What're you doin'?" Peter cut you off your thoughts.

You were planning to make cupcakes with cream.

Peter's favourite.

"Im currently pouring flour to a bowl.

What do you think im doing?"

"Making fake ash so you could fake your death and ran to live in bora bora?" Peter joked and leaned on the island.

You rolled your eyes,

"Of course. Then I'll find a prince there and I'll live an happy perfect Disney life"

You go on with his story.

Peter chuckled and smiled.

"So, how can i help you? Tell me what to do, big sheff" he teased and folded his sleeves.

"We need some eggs and oil.

Oh and the coco powder is in the fridge"

You knew exactly what to do.

You're making this cupcakes everything mouth for peter.

"Will do"

-----

The cupcakes were out the oven, cooling.

"So... Pink frosting or blue frosting?" I asked peter, lifting the small food colouring bottles.

"You can do pink and I'll do the blue"

You put the bottles on the island and looked at him in disappointment.

"Peter that was a really chauvinistic thing to say. The fact that pink has to be a girly colour is an-"

"Absurd, and just for your information, kings used to wear pink all the time and I'm soppoed to be a feminist friend giving the fact im living with two Independent amazing and beautiful woman" peter recite the speech i used to give him every time he wold say something like 'you should wear a dress'.

You rolled your eyes again.

"Looking for your brain?" He asked, teasing you.

"No, I'm lookin for your humour"

Peter gasped

"How dare you insult my jokes?" He put a hand on his chest, pretending you hurt his feelings.

Then, he took the spoon from the bowl with the melted chocolate and Squirt on face.

You jumped back from suprise, wiping the chocolate from your cheek.

"Your a dead man, parker" you hissed at him, grabbing the bowl of the white icing, dipping your hand in it and smashing Peter's face with it.

And then, like five years olds, we started to scream and throw chocolate and icing at eachother, messing the whole kitchen.

Peter grabbed you and pinned you to the island.

Then, he took the chocolate bowl and spilled it all over you.

"Ahh! Peter!!" You yelled wipping the brown liquid from you eyes.

"You've got something there" peter said, pointing on your nose.

Only now you realised how close peter was.

His face were only inches from yours.

His eyes smiling with him, not noticing how nervous you got.

Thank god I'm covered with icing or else he would see how red i am. Peter thought.

He heard y/ns heart beat getting faster and faster, thanks to his spidey sense's.

Do it. Do it now. You have to kiss him now.

You thought.

And peter looked like he got the same idea, because you both started to leaned in.

You felt his lip brushing yours, not sure.

You crushed your lips on his, not letting him hesitate.

Peter cupped you dirty cheek with his hand, not caring about the mess.

You gripped the sides of his shirt, pulling him closer to you.

Finely. You both thought.

Peter dreamed about kissing you since you moved in with him and may.

Peter always liked you but he wasn't sure how it'll effect your friendship and how you'll react.

He's lips.

He's lips were soft and sweet and tasted like vanilla and chocolate....

It was amazing.

It was everything you wanted.

You've never kissed anyone before.

Its was your first time, so Peter's.

And you couldn't imagine it anyway different.

The kiss was perfect.

She was full of love, and carefull.

She was sweet and gentle.

She was a little bit desperate, consider the fact that you both wanted this for so long.

Peter waited for too long

You waited for too long

You pulled back, looking at the floor.

"So, purple frosting?"

[twilatethoughtsandshit]

Late Night Conversation

Summary: reader and spidey get personal on a rooftop

Warnings: alcohol, swearing, suicide mention 

( BTW I aged everyone up to senior year because sophomore year was awful for me and I don't want to think about that)

A/N: I’m currently taking requests so if you have any fic ideas hmu! this was based on Tom Hollands Spiderman. Have a nice day/night!

The wind blew through my hair and tickled my face as I sat upon the rooftop thinking of how shit life was going lately. I hadn’t gotten accepted to my number one choice of college, I had lost all my friends due to lies, and with graduation quickly approaching the thought of making life changing decisions was terrifying. The city lights seemed brighter tonight than they normally look, but that may have been a side effect of my slight intoxication. I sighed loudly and took another sip from my vodka and coke, damn life sucked. I stood up and wrapped my blanket around me as I approached the edge of the building. I looked down towards the ground and it fascinated me just to look down at the ground from this dizzying height. I was so entranced by how high up I was that I didn't realize there was someone on the roof with me until something hit my back and I was yanked backwards.

“What the fuc-”

“Don’t do it.” I looked up to see a masked face that I recognized as good ole superhero Spiderman.

“Don’t do what?”

“Jump.” I let out a laugh that was definitely inappropriate for the situation, but it was just so funny to me.

“I wasn't gonna jump; I just never realized how high up I was.”

“Oh…”

“It’s cool… would've been helpful if I was gonna jump tho,” I moved away from him and took a swig of my drink. I sighed and muttered, “I’m not drunk enough for this shit.”

He gave me a weird look and asked, “ Are you drinking?”

“Yeah… you’re not gonna call the cops on me are you?” I grinned and winked at him. He sighed and shook his head; I walked over to where my 12 pack of sodas was and offered him one. “Want one? There’s no alcohol in this one, see? It’s not even opened yet.”

“Thanks,” He grabbed the soda, opened it, and put it up to his face before seemingly remembering that his mask was on. He set the drink down and pulled up the bottom of his mask until his mouth was exposed, then he picked up his soda and took a gulp. I grinned at him while I poured a little more vodka into my drink. “So… why are you drinking?”

“Hmm..?”

“You aren’t.. you don't seem like the type to drink,” He told me while I capped the alcohol.

“Well I’m sad and confused and don't know how else to cope,” I replied taking a swig and shuddering at the bitter taste of the vodka. “And before you go on about how that’s bad, don't worry I already know. That’s why I don't do this often.”

He nodded and stretched his arms out, then in one fluid motion he sat down on the ground. He looked up and patted the space next to him. I sat down next to him and snuggled into my blanket before looking over at him.

“Do you want some of my blanket?”

“Ah no thanks I'm good.”

“Are you sure? It’s cold.”

“I’ve got heaters, I'm good.”

“You’ve got heaters in your suit?” He nodded, “Damn superheroes getting all the cool shit.”

He laughed at me and looked over at me, grinning. “So, what’s got you down?”

“Like I would tell you, I don't even know you!”

“Isn’t that the beauty of it though? You don’t know who I am, so shouldn't it be easier to tell me what’s on your mind?”

“Ah you would think spidey-boy,” I took a moment to down the rest of my drink. “But isn't that a burden on you? Knowing all about people’s problems should be a priest’s job, not yours.” I opened another coke and drank some before cracking open the vodka again, “You’re not a priest, are you?”

“What? No, no… I just like to help people who are feeling down. Makes me feel like I’m making a difference in people’s lives.”

“Saving people from crime isn't enough?”

He didn't answer me, instead he just looked forward towards the city lights. I joined his gaze to watch the city; it was comforting to just sit and watch life move around us because it seemed that time had stopped here. In my peripheral vision I saw him take a drink from his soda, he set it down on the concrete roof a turned his head to me. “Aren’t the city lights beautiful?” I nodded and looked at him smiling.

“Why do you think I come up here?”

“To be sad?” He said jokingly and laughed a little.

“Ya know I come up here to be happy too,” I laughed. “Occasionally I like to shake it up a bit.” We laughed before the silence swept over us once again; feeling awkward I gulped down some more of my drink. I had begun to feel the slight fuzziness of alcohol wash over my system and I breathed in heavily. My phone vibrated in my pocket and I pulled it out to see a text from my mother, ‘Sorry honey, wont be home tonight. just got pulled into another surgery love u .’ I put my hands over my face and dragged them down slowly before putting my phone away and turning to face the half-masked stranger.

“Have you ever felt entirely alone?” He shrugged before nodding. “I mean… I lost all my friends this week. I have no one to talk to and I hate it. I didn't even have that many friends to begin with…” Tears began to form in my eyes and I covered my face with my hands once again.

“What happened?” He asked as he put an arm around my shoulder; I uncovered my face and leaned my head on his shoulder.

“One of my friends boyfriends hates me, so he told everyone I tried to get him to cheat on my friend. Everyone believed him and now no one is talking to me.”

“Wow… that’s brutal.”

“Right? High schoolers are the worst. Besides I would never try to do anything with any of my friends boyfriends, I’m not that mean.”

“You’re in high school,” He said rather than asked. I nodded, “Do you go to Midtown?”

“How’d you know?”

“Uh… this is the district for that school right?”

“Oh yeah. Guess you’re right.” I sighed, “Damn I’m such a bummer right now.”

He grinned again, “That’s okay. Everyone has to be a bummer sometimes, otherwise you’ll never have fun.”

“Guess you’re right again… God I really don’t want to go back to school.”

“Why’s that?”

“I don’t have any friends, remember?” I tapped my nose then made finger guns at him; he laughed.

“Do you know a kid named Peter?”

“Peter…?”

“Peter Parker?”

“Oh you mean genius boy? Yeah I know of him.”

“He’s not a genius,” he laughed.

“He’s had a Stark Industries internship for two years, two! Stark would never hire a teenager unless they were a genius or had super powers,” I snorted. “But Peter Parker is way too shy to be a superhero, so he must be a genius.”

Spiderman laughed at me and put his hands up in surrender, “Okay, okay, you’re right.” He laughed a little bit more, even though it was not that funny. “Anyways, if you feel bad at school or need to talk to someone, go to him.”

“Why would I go to him if I need someone to talk to?”

“Well, let’s just say I’ve known Peter a long time and I know that he doesn't like people feeling bad. Just tell him you need someone to talk to and I’m sure he’ll befriend you like that,” He snapped.

“So he’s kinda like you?”

“What!?”

“Well you apparently both like to talk to sad people and make them feel better.”

“Yeah… you’re right..”

“Are you sure it’ll be ok to talk to him?” I asked tentatively, “I mean, I’ve never spoken to him before in my life. I don't want to randomly dump my problems onto him.”

“Don’t worry about it, he owes me.” He took a sip from his soda, “And hey, if he isn't nice to you, I’ll beat him up.”

“You swear?”

“I guarantee it.”

I grinned at him and then checked the time, “Oh geez it’s getting late. I should probably go inside and go to bed.” He nodded and stood up, then extended a hand to pull me to my feet.

“Are you gonna need help getting back into your apartment?”

“Why would I need help getting into my apartment?” I asked confused before cracking a smile,  “You’re not hitting on me are you?”

“No,” He chuckled a little. “You’ve been drinking and I don’t want you to fall or anything.”

“Oh don’t worry about it, I’ll be fine.” I picked up the rest of my things and headed towards the door inside. “Hey thanks for not letting me drink alone.”

“No problem,” He waved as he pulled his mask back down and jumped off the building drink in hand.

“Make sure to recycle that soda can when you’re done with it!” I called after him, to which he replied with a salute and then disappeared into the night.

[touchedbythegreenman]

Super Science Dads #3

Prompt: ‘Whoa dude, look at that!’

Oh man why had he done that?? Peter’s face was still burning as he hurried back towards Aunt May’s, gripping the bag of cookies he’d accidentally on purpose forgotten to give to Mr Stark. The man was in intensive care, he didn’t need avocado chocolate chip cookies on top of that. Cacti? Why cacti? Was there an appropriate ‘I’m sorry I was totally incompetent when you took me to Germany to help your international superhero team’ gift? A ‘I’m sorry I didn’t stop the people who shot your best friend out of the sky’ gift? Even maybe a ‘I’m sorry I didn’t stick Captain America (CAPTAIN AMERICA) better with my webbing when he came after us but I didn’t take SUPER SOLDIER STRENGTH INTO ACCOUNT WHEN I MADE IT MR STARK SIR I AM SO SORRY YOU GOT HURT’ gift perhaps???

And then Mr stark had been so cool about it and had refused every apology and had even apologised to him and made him laugh and seemed really keen on the cacti and even introduced him to one of his friends who weren’t trying to kill them and Peter had gone and made a hash of that too and accused Mr Stark Iron Man Call Me Tony Kid of betraying his trust!

He was never going to be invited back to do ‘grown up’ superhero stuff again.

Peter carefully disposed of the cookies (were they – moulting? Wouldn’t that be the cherry on top of the cake if he had to one day defend the city from his Aunt’s home baking??) and slipped into the house, heading for his room at a speed that was probably nearer the ‘1.13% quicker than normal human reflexes are wont to be’ like Mr Stark’s friend Bruce had said.

“Peter?”

“Yes Aunt May?” He paused on the landing, keeping his tone light because if he did that then she might not want to ask questions and he might get away with burying himself in total abject embarrassment in his room like a normal 15-year-old for once.

“How is Mr Stark, honey?”

“He’s – not great, Aunt May. He liked the cacti and said thanks for the cookies. I’m gonna do my homework, okay?”

She stepped out of the kitchen and looked up the stairs at him, a small frown on her forehead. “Oh Peter, that bad?”

“I – he’s gonna get better he said, but –“

“But?”

“It – it’s wrong that it happened to him.” Whatever had happened. All Peter knew was that Mr Vision The Vision had said that ‘Mr Stark is recuperating from a combat in Siberia’ and why had he been in Siberia and why had Captain America not helped him? Wasn’t that the point of fighting the accords? To be able to help? Then why not Mr Tony? “I wanted to help.”

“I know.” She beckoned and he went to her because she was still home and mother-love and everything that he had always wanted as a child. “What else, dude?”

“Dude? Aunt May –“

“Dude. What’s up? What’s happening. What’s – ‘the hap’?” She made honest-to-god airquotes and he had to laugh. “What’s your beef?”   “Aunt May please stop.”

“I’ll stop when you tell me why the long face. Dude. Dude with the longest face in the world. Whoa, dude. Look at that! It’s Peter Parker with such a long face that horses are jealous!” Aunt May gave him a firm squeeze, and ruffled his hair. “Well? Is this about Germany?”

“G-germany?” Peter felt his stomach roll into a tiny ball and drop to his feet. “Wh-what about Germany?”

“Peter. I may be older than you but I’m not senile. Mr Stark thinks I’m a ‘hot aunt’,” (there were the airquotes again). “Do you think I’ve not noticed that you seem to be out a lot more recently? That you always seem to be sore or stiff or hurt? That this all started when a certain unnamed vigilante started working in the city? That you disappeared with Mr Stark about the same time Iron Man and Spiderman showed up in Germany and you came back injured in the same way I’d have expected him to be? Or that you look ridiculously guilty every time I tell you how happy I am that you’ve got a more active social life and have made all these friends you’re always hanging out with?”

Oh shit. Peter gulped and shook his head.

“Exactly. So I’ve got a pot of tea on, you’re going to come sit down and tell me all about it.” Aunt May’s smile hardened a little, like steel. “Aren’t you.”

“Yes ma’am.” He should definitely have stayed out to make sure those cookies wouldn’t take over Queens, Peter thought as he followed his aunt glumly to the living room. Even chocolate avocado would have been better than this.

[bolontiku]

*not my images*

A Joker A/U

"Smile Kitten"

Summary: the Joker finds you on the streets and decides to take you home.

***

You felt the rain falling as it numbed you. Making it impossible for others on the streets to see your tears. You felt empty.

Your phone buzzed. Glancing at it you saw it was the app you had helped develope, ‘the Bat spotter’. People would upload pictures of Batman comment on his location or activity, you had uploaded the most. Not that 28 was a lot, but you only took the best, all the others you disposed of. it was  an app to help keep people of out the way, keep them safe from potential danger.

‘You spend all your time on the streets! What did you expect?!’ he yelled at you as he jerked his pants up. The girl had disappeared within seconds of your arrival.

‘Its my work! Theres Peter Parker who gets pictures of Spiderman! I happen to get some of Batman and-’

‘Oh as if you dont harbor feelings for him?!’ he scoffed. 'I know about the night you spent with him!’ he threw a file at you pictures spilling to the ground. You quickly fell to your knees and started picking them up.

'Matt, are you kidding?! That night i was too damn close, its not like he knows who i am! I am not Lois Lane damn! spent the night with him…he got me to safety, i still dont even know where i was, just that i was underground..’ you realized you were defending yourself and snapped your mouth closed, this didnt matter. he was distracting you, putting the blame on you, trying to turn things around.

You shook your head. It didnt matter, it had been months coming. You had noticed how he had pulled away from you. Going out at odd times of the day, not touching you, not communicating. When his friends came around they were oddly silent around you. Never making eye contact.

“Hey, Y/N?” you looked up as your phone buzzed again. “Matt just posted about your break up. You okay?”

He was one of his friends. You smiled and kept walking finally looking down at your phone. Bats was spotted not too far. You looked around, there was a subcategory. Jokers Lamborghini was spotted 10 mins ago.

what did it matter? you frowned as you looked down at your phone, nothing mattered anymore as you still felt the sting on your cheek, the bruises that were definitely left on your upper arms from where he had grabbed you not letting you get any of your things. you could feel your hip ache from where you had landed on the ground after he threw you out.

As you stepped out onto the street you heard the screeching of tires. The car stopped inches from you. Something sparked inside you, anger. You slammed your hands down on the purple hood before you could think. “HEY IM WALKIN HERE!!” you yelled angrily trying not to burst into tears.

The door swung upwards and you stumbled back a curse whispering past your lips. Green hair, pale skin, the King of Crime stepped out. “Well, well, well…”

“Oh, fuck…” you turned around and bolted. A cry escaped your lips as a black SUV pulled in front of you screeching to a halt. You skidded and as the doors swung open several men were on you in seconds before you could run again.

You gulped in breaths as they dragged you back to where the Joker leaned against the front of his lambo.

He chuckled as he stood and reached out to touch your face. “Tsk, dont do that!” he chided you as you shrunk back as much as you could away from him. “Where is that girl i just saw?!” he asked immitating your earlier actions, slamming his own hands down on the hood of the car. “Such fearlessness!”

“Boss, the Bat is headed this way,” a man said. He held up his phone, it was your app!

“Put her in my car!” he growled.

“NO!” your voice was too shrill even to your ears. Still the men grabbed you tossing you into the lambo with no effort. You clawed at the door trying to open it.

“It wont open. My car. I locked it and only i can unlock it.” he informed you laughing loudly.

“Please just let me go! Im sorry i hit your car!” you begged.

He just chuckled ignoring your pleas. He seemed to be enjoying his drive as if…you looked at you phone. There was a picture of the lambo, the men around you as they held you in front of the Joker. People were commenting and liking and pictured were being uploaded faster than you had ever seen. 

finally, there it was the Batmobile. someone finally snapped a shot captioning it ‘blurry but the Bats is right on the Jokers ass!’

“he’s coming for you,” you whispered.

“he’s coming for you,” Joker mimicked as he turned abruptly making you slam against the door. “he wont save you if thats what your thinking.” he growled annoyed as he stepped on the gas, gaining speed.

you felt your heart drop, “i know that! i’m not worth saving anyhow.” you muttered remembering Matt’s last words to you. you didnt see Joker look over at you his brow furrowing.

‘your worthless and no one will ever love you.’

***

A/N: let me know what you think! i know its short! still gonna write a couple more to this