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lord-explosion-baku · 4 years ago

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Sorrow

Yandere Siren/Fae!Hawks x Reader

Warnings: Yandere content, survivalism, pain, slight blood, suggestive adult content

A/N: This is one of the fics I was gonna post in October, but didn’t finish it on time, but I guess that means I can be a spooky dude all year round.

Tears may be cheap, but you keep them sacred.

Your captor has taken almost everything away from you: your body, your mind, your freedom, but you will not be giving him your sorrow. That will stay buried, locked away inside your chest, where the key lies somewhere he will never get to. You know he wants it. He’d told you as much.

“I’ve committed all of your expressions to memory,” he’d said one night after you nearly bit his tongue off. He’d used his song to ease you into a half-lucid state, where he kept you in his lap, wrapped tightly in his arms, shrouded in his wings. “The scorch in your hateful eyes when you wish you could fight me. The tremble in your delicious pout when you wish you could resist me. The furrow in those beautiful brows when I have you forfeited to the pleasure I give you after a battle you wish you could have won.”

Air-light fingers brushed down your cheek. He’d grabbed you by the chin, and tilted your head so that your gaze was locked in with his.

“Do I really gotta sing every time I want you to surrender, little dove?”

His fingers tip-toed down your chest, past your opened blouse. His thumb encircled your nipple until it puckered for him. He’d given it a teasing pinch. You’d stifled a moan lodged in your throat. He’d noticed.

“Aren’t you sorry for hurting me?”

You remember how good it felt to have him kneading at your chest. How his breath was nothing short of intoxicating. How you wanted nothing more than to lean into him—to kiss him—to put your hands all over him. You also remember that the only reason you wanted any of that was due to his song—his sweet siren lullaby.

“Tell me you’re sorry, angel,” he’d said, cupping your face with his free hand. His thumb slid across your cheek, under your eye. You’d known he wanted to see you cry so badly. You would not.

You’d shaken your head, and took note of the twitch in his feathered eyebrows.

His hands had moved through your hair then, lightly pulling through your roots. That was when he’d parted his lips, and began to sing.

Kiego has three songs committed to memory: one to lull you to sleep, one to make you more suggestable in the bedroom, and one to beckon you to him. The song he’d sang for you that night was the suggestable one—the mesmeric tune that made you turn around so that your knees were on either side of his thighs, the one that made you melt into his embrace, the one that made you his.

You’ve always wondered why? Why you? Out of anybody in the world, the siren had grown to have an obsessive infatuation with you. At times, you have thought that if it hadn’t been you, it would be another unfortunate soul in your place—somebody else that might not be able to withstand him, or somebody else who would actively enjoy his company. But during the times he sings for you, you don’t think. You don’t have to.

When he sang to you that night, all you could think about was giving him everything he wanted; however, the stubborn sore in your heart still clung on to the idea that he would not have you in tears.

“Say you’re sorry,” he’d commanded again between slow, sensuous kisses.

And you’d responded with: “never.”

Since then, you’ve been good. You’ve been obedient. You’ve given him everything except your tears. If you don’t stick to your ideals, then you really do have nothing.

However, when one only has so little to lose, and so much more to gain, one becomes reckless. First, your recklessness comes in mere thoughts—creeping visions of harming your winged abuser, which proves as dangerous, seeing as he’s stronger than you, faster than you, and has that pesky siren song. Then, you’ve begun thinking about running. The closer, more agreeable you become, the more he lets his guard down. Unbeknownst to him, you’ve begun learning his schedule: when he eats, when he hunts, when he sleeps, and what wakes him.

Comfort and praise seems to be the ticket to getting him to trust you more. Each night, you stroke his wings, you kiss his neck, you tell him his voice is gorgeous, fathomless, and irresistible. He thinks he has you under his spell—maybe he does, a little bit—but you’re not completely lost to him. You know that you have to leave. You know that you will leave. You’ve just got to figure out when.

It happens early in the morning.

The night before, he’d brought home spirits for you and him to drink. The two of you toasted to each other, danced together, and drank together. But he hadn’t seen that most of what had been in your glass went discarded in one of the potted plants full of herbs and berries he has allowed you to tend to. He hadn’t seen when you spiked his glass with a concoction you’d been working on for weeks with the herbs and berries he’d allowed you to tend to. He hadn’t noticed when his eyes grew drowsy, and he fell into bed with you in tow, you eased away from him, waiting for his breathing to slow.

The sun’s not up yet, but you know you have to leave. When you’re ready, you tie your boots, stock some food and water, and despite everything he’s put you through, you kiss him. Once. A sort of farewell, thanks for the memories, I won’t be missing you, you piece of chicken shit.

The departure is soundless—something you’re not used to due to Kiego’s constant singing, crooning, and happy little chirps. His guard had been down the night before, so there aren't as many safety precautions to heed as you silently maneuver your way to escape his loft.

When you’re out, you’re out. Free. Running. The most you can do to not shriek with glee and alert him of your escape is to keep your goal in mind: Find civilization. Find help. Hide. Keep running. Whatever you need to do to keep your safe stead.

At least, that’s always been the plan. You hadn’t accounted for the landscape. In fact, you’ve only ever seen a fraction of the surrounding parameters of his loft. You don’t know about the drop-off point by the outer edge of the woods. The whispering oranges of dawn have only just cracked through the trees, so you don’t see the danger when you slip on some foliage and are sent spiraling. Falling, rolling, screaming, until you catch yourself on a tree. Rather, your body wraps around a tree, which nearly knocks the wind out of you.

Groaning, you lay there for a while and breathe. The air filling up your lungs is frigid. Deadly. A part of you wants to fall asleep, find warmth in your dreams. A part of you knows that if you do that, you might catch hypothermia and die.

So you stand.

The world is dizzying. Trees tilt, while shrubs and rocks spin around you. Your first few steps are a sideways hustle. You’re like a toddler first learning to walk. There’s a sharp pain in your leg, and it takes everything out of you not to look down. If you think you’re seriously injured, you’ll give up. You hadn’t packed anything for first aid, and even if you had, you’ve lost your water and food during the fall.

You’re not sure which way to walk for a few minutes. You’re dawdling, finding your footing. The destination should be away from the drop-off, so you slowly make your way down the hill, sitting and scooting when you’re unsure if you’ll fall again.

It’s only when you find solid ground again that you hear him. His song. Some new hypnotic tune, miles away, reverberating throughout the forest. It’s nothing short of haunting and you don’t spare another second to listen. He’s awake. He knows you’re gone.

The next mile is clumsier than before. Though you’re sure not to fall, your balance is off, and your body slams into a dozen trees. Sometimes it’s because you can’t help it, while you often just need one to hold you up so you can breathe. Your palms cover your ears the entire time, and even still, his song gets louder. Invasive. He’s growing nearer. If you don’t hide, he will find you.

By nothing short of a miracle, you find a large tree where the trunk is hollowed out. You crawl in, allowing your hands to touch the ground, away from your ears for only a moment, but a moment is all the song needs.

Suddenly, you’re struck with an aching. It’s anguish. Mourning. Sorrowful remembrance. Your chest constricts with a dire need to release, but you don’t go so far to ponder exactly what it is trying to crawl its way up your esophagus. You hold back your emotions with what’s left of your strength, while you try to keep your breathing steady.

Through the cracks in the trunk, you see a flash of brilliant crimson. The ground thuds with his landing. It’s silent for a moment, until his song starts up again. You keep your palms clamped over your ears while you bury your head between your knees. You’ll stay like that for however long is needed. You will not allow yourself to be seduced or lulled or beckoned. You will not be found.

There’s no telling how much time has passed. Seconds crawl to minutes, and minutes crawl to excruciating tension. You’re not aware of the end of his song until you use your hand to wipe at your leg. It’s sticky, probably from blood, but you won’t think about it until you’re safe.

It has to have been awhile since he’s scoured the area. You army crawl out of the tree, chest scraping away at the frosty, dirt floor. The sun is barely peeking up through the trees, and you allow its warmth to touch your mud-caked skin.

In the distance, there’s smoke. With a bit of walking, you see a fire pit, and someone in a black, wool cloak sitting by it.

Picking up your pace, you call out to him, but your voice cracks to only a squeak. Still, the hooded man looks up at you. You hope he can see that you’re hurt, recognize that you’re in need of first aid. He can shelter you, take you back to civilization, and save you.

But while you half-hazardly bound towards him, you’re pushed to the side. Rather, you’re zooming through the air, unable to utter a scream, until your back slams into a tree.

Despite the pain, the loss of energy, you writhe and howl under Keigo’s harsh scrutiny. His wings spread out, taking a predatory stance, while desperate amber eyes search your body. Though his face doesn’t show a hint of malice, you know the trouble you’re in. His lips part, and an unfamiliar melody begins.

“No!!!!!” Your hands fly up to your ears, but he catches them in a vice grip, pinning them back against the giant tree’s trunk. He begins to sing and you know you’ve lost.

Loss. That’s what this is—his song. Unbridled, unrelenting grief. The tune sweeps across your feet, slowly creeping up your body. It hugs your waist as it wraps around you, squeezing as it coils. You choke as the substantial heartache clogs your throat with the emotions you’ve been repressing for months.

Tears burn your lower lashes and your vision blurs. You blink, and a hot stream runs down your cheek. Though Keigo continues to sing, you see a subtle tilt to his mouth. While your body slackens, too tired to fight him off any longer, he cups your face and pulls you into him before you can crumple. He pets your beat up, bruised back, and coos.

“Sneaky little bird.” There are two octaves in Keigo’s voice as he speaks to you, as if two people were speaking at once. “I’ve been worried sick about you.”

A part of his statement is true. You can feel it. His songs reflect his emotions and desires, and he wouldn’t be able to create this relentless melody unless he, too, felt the way it made you feel. But you also hear the triumph on his tenor. He has obtained what he’s always wanted: the key to that sacred place in your heart you wouldn’t allow him to venture to. There’s no saying that he doesn’t now own you completely.

“My sweet angel, what am I going to do with you?” As he speaks, you cling to him, knitting your nails into his shirt.

“I’m s-sorry.” It’s a faint croak, but it’s all you have to offer him. It’s all you can do to stop more renegade tears from staining his shirt. His chest shakes as he chuckles.

A twig snaps in the near distance. Keigo sharply turns towards the noise, and wraps an arm around your waist, one of his wings shrouding you slightly. Through his puffed out feathers, you see the man from the fire pit standing near a tree. He eyes the both of you with intrigue, but not concern. You cast him a pleading look, and you know he sees you, but all he does is sigh.

There’s a low, sort of echoing growl coming from deep within your captor’s chest. It’s menacingly territorial, but the cloaked man doesn’t react. Instead, he steps back and into the tree. Not like he stepped into the tree, rather, at one point he was a man, and now he is the tree. Two separate objects becoming one.

Keigo lets out an annoyed grunt, and in one swift movement, hoists you into his arms, carrying you in bridal style. He looks down at your leg, which you can now see has a giant scarlet puddled gash in it.

“Let’s get you cleaned up,” he says while his wings begin to flap. The gusts blow foliage around you as you lift off the ground, and Keigo offers you a sort of sweet, conjugal smile. “After that, we can discuss your...punishment.”

A sob tears out from your throat. Keigo tuts, cradling you closer to his chest.

“You don’t have to worry, little dove. Though, I do promise to be gentle, don’t expect me to act like a gentleman. You’ve put us through the ringer today, and once you’re healed and healthy, we’ll work on all the ways you’ll be apologizing. Until then, let’s go home.”

Home. The place where Keigo will have you locked away in his birdcage of a loft. The place where you give him your body, your mind, your freedom, and now, even your sorrow.

While the two of you take flight, you think to cry some more--to let it all out of your system before you have your captor’s undivided attention. But as he flies, he hums a tune, and soon your eyelids fall, and you slacken in his embrace.

#yandere bnha #yandere!hawks #hawks x reader #yandere!hawks x reader #keigo takami x reader #bnha imagine #bnha reader insert #reader insert #bnha x reader #siren!hawks #siren!hawks x reader #yandere male #bnha oneshot #yandere!keigo takami #yandere x reader #suggestive content

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thefairyletters · 4 years ago

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✨ Spooky Recs✨

I read a lot of fanfictions... More than I am proud of. I thought I should recommend as I go before I lose sight of their existence among the sea of my favorites.

Since past few days I have been craving for some creepy, unnerving fanfics that will keep me restless and awake at night. I remembered my favorites and wanted to read more of the kind so I looked up, patiently going through each story that sounded compelling. I also revisited old stories for nostalgia's sake.

Of course, rare as they are, in Naruto fandom no less, it's even harder to find a horror and mystery fic that is well written, not dropped under 2 chapters, and really keeps your attention.

🔹🔹🔹🔹🔹🔹🔹🔹🔹🔹🔹🔹🔹🔹🔹🔹🔹🔹🔹

Genre: Horror, Mystery, Comedy

I've rated 4 aspects of the work -

Writing – I don't judge writing based solely on the grammar and vocabulary. I also consider how the author expands upon a subject, if they are consistent with the facts, if they are able to keep the attention of the readers regardless of their creative writing skills.

Characters – If the characters are well-developed, in their given character, if OCs have any real significance to the story.

Plot – How gripping is the storyline, if the story sticks to its original plot, the structure of the story, plot holes.

Flow – Mother-of-slow-burn, slow-but-steady, steady, fast, I-am-speed

When the flowers cry : TCOOKIES777 || M || AO3/FFN || SasuSaku || Goth Horror || Post-Canon, set during Blank Period || Ongoing

When one of the greatest medical-nin in the world goes missing in what should have been a simple delivery to the Land of Spring’s Hidden Snow Village, the rest of Team 7 must reunite to find her. But even the most powerful team of shinobi will find themselves challenged in a battle against the supernatural. With Sasuke's return, vengeful ghosts of the past will test him and his love.

My thoughts : One of the best stories I've read in a while, and top tier SS stories. I read this in one sitting. I never listen to music while reading, preferring silence, but for this one, I suggest you do as the author says. Also, keep some tissues and food with you. This story is major in mystery and minor in horror but otherwise full of SS fluff.

Writing: 10/10

Characters: 10/10

Plot: 9/10

Flow: Steady, if a bit confusing (but that's why it's mystery)

Kyuro : silver_shot || T || AO3 || SasuSaku || Mystery || Post-Canon || Complete

“Oh,” says Naruto, “well, its sort of like that. Except in this village, the story has a way more darker ending – it basically goes like this: the girl and the guy plan to run away together. The guy steals a bunch of treasure, and stashes it away. But then, when he goes to get the girl at her village, he kills her and decides to run away with all that money. But then he is killed by the guards of the girls village and now they're both dead and the treasure is hidden away somewhere”. Sasuke stares blankly at the blond, “that story makes no sense”.

My thoughts : I know you must be thinking the same thing as Sasuke – "makes no sense". I did too, but it's a pretty cool short story. It lies on the funny, creepy side that slowly starts to lose its funny touch. SS makes stupid mistakes later on but it could be because they are MCs. The ending is very ambiguous. It's not my favorite mystery but it is something. Enjoyable read but not something I will pick again.

Writing: 8/10

Characters: 8/10

Plot: 8/10

Flow: Fast

Moon stuttering in the sky : xfrinz || T || AO3 || Gen || Mystery || Pre-Shippuden || One-shot

Kakashi is suspicious of many things about Haruno Sakura. Too many things about her don't make sense, with too many incongruous explanations.

My thoughts : Author of this story just summarised Pre-Shippuden in less than 4k words and made some tiny changes to it. Not much though. One of my favorite gen fics yet. Read it if you haven't yet. You'll feel more sad than thrilled tbh. But worth it.

Writing: 10/10

Characters: 10/10

Plot: 10/10

Flow: I-am-Speed

Breath mints : silver_shot || T || AO3 || SasuSaku || Comedy-Mystery || Post-Canon || Ongoing (maybe)

Their home no longer exists with the life it once had – in fact no settlement thrives anymore; they exist only in a snapshot that contradicts time itself. Families within their own homes sleep in a slumber that they cannot wake from. Those that were chatting on the street prior to the event simply drop their heads and remain unresponsive.

My thoughts : I picked it up for Mystery but I stayed for Comedy. But of course that's not to say supernatural elements in this story is not it, but it sure pales in comparison to effortless humor in this story. Lee and Kiba pair is something you don't see often but they get along too well here. Charactisation is on point as well. SS angst! + NS angst (but it's downplayed)

Writing: 10/10

Characters: 10/10

Plot: 9/10

Flow: Steady

The Curse : sincerelyLen || T || FFN || SasuSaku || Horror || Post-Canon || Ongoing

Team 7 is unexpectedly assigned an S-Ranked Mission involving an unsolved mystery of 10 years. An eerie adventure that will test their teamwork, strengths, and greatest fears. Do you believe in Curses?

My thoughts : My all-time favourite horror Naruto fanfiction. To me, this sets the standard of how mystery and horror elements should be handled. I have never been able to get this story out of my mind even it's been years. Perfect charactisation of Team 7 with Smart-yet-Stupid!Sakura, I-can-fight-aliens-and-reanimated-corpses-but-keep-ghosts-away-from-me!Naruto and I-dont-get-paid-enough-for-this!Sasuke. I especially love OCs here. They kinda reminds me of Pillars from KnY. You must read this story, loosely based on Zombie apocalypse + curse concept.

Writing: 10/10

Characters: 10/10

Plot: 10/10

Flow: Slow-but-Steady

Silent High : Istoria || T || FFN || Gen || Mystery || Post-Canon || Complete

A bit of the Silent Hill series mixed in with Naruto. Trapped in an illusion whose rules are unknown, they struggle to find answers before darkness consumes them.

My thoughts : One of the best mystery fanfictions I've read. I especially loved how this story handled Genjutsu in the best possible way it could without it turning into some cliche, ghost story. Though really, this story has shown what my greatest fear actually is. I will never be able to leave my back open to a wheelchair. This story has simple writing yet it gives you creeps with the twists and turns. A must read one because it is unlike any other in this list.

Writing: 9/10

Characters: 10/10

Plot: 10/10

Flow: Steady

Silence of the Damned : Daystar Clarion || T || FFN || Gen || Psychological Horror, Mystery(?) || Pre-Shippuden || One-Shot

When Naruto wakes up to a dead body in his bathroom, he begins a quick spiral into madness.

My thoughts : Listen to Halsey's Control while reading this. Quite chilling, deals with mental issues and morbid but in a fascinating way. It gives a new meaning to Dark!Naruto, but one that actually makes sense. I never saw the ending coming... I had something else in mind and I was convinced it would be, but nope. Here's a sequel to this One-Shot (Uzumaki's War) which I never picked up.

Writing: 10/10

Characters: 9/10

Plot: 9/10

Flow: Slow-but-steady

To the Victor : Letta || T || FFN || NaruSaku || Psychological Horror || Shippuden || One-Shot

Naruto loses the fight and Sakura is a trophy of war.

My thoughts : A very twisted NS, if you squint. It's not horror but it might as well be... it is still a disturbing story to see from the eyes of Sakura. Quite chilling to be in Sakura's shoes. But I love this because it is one shot and I loved the ending.

Writing: 9/10

Characters: 10/10

Plot: 8/10

Flow: Steady

Under the Skin : BukkakeNoJutsu || T || FFN || Team 8 || Body Horror || Pre-Shippuden || One-Shot

Your actions don't make you a monster. Your reasons do.

My thoughts : There's a reason why Shino is my favourite team 8 member. In my opinion, Shino is also one of the strongest Shinobi of his generation. His clan techniques are just that horrifying. This story is testament to that. He is so terrible.

Writing: 10/10

Characters: 10/10

Plot: 10/10

Flow: Slow-but-steady

Instant Message : Keelah || T || FFN || SasuSaku || Murder mystery || Modern AU || Incomplete

She gave him names to kill, in order not to be killed herself. But having blood on her hands was turning out to be much worse than dying. "…There's still round 2…3…4…" When does this game end? She asked. "Don't you see, Sakura?" He said, "It never does."

My thoughts : I read this story a long time ago and have read this twice. Personally, it has the most interesting concept of all stories in the list. It reminds me of Vocaloid series, "Bookmark of the end". Kind of. To those who are thinking of picking this up, go ahead! It's a great book and has one of the best suspense I've read in Fandom. BUT, it has been stopped in mother-of-all-cliffhangers and Author is MIA for 4 years now. But, all things considered, it remains to be one of the best stories I've read.

Writing: 10/10

Characters: 9/10

Plot: 10/10

Flow: Steady

Monomoth : Ohtze || M || FFN/AO3 || SasuSaku || Horror || AU || Incomplete

Everything ends, eventually. Eight years after the war, Sakura's unhinged and Sasuke's obsessed. The fields are filled with corpses.

My thoughts : I read this story right after "The Curse", my favourite. From what I remember, Sakura and Sasuke are both mentally deranged, in different ways. Lots of death and gore to stomach, so not for weak readers. There's no speak of fluff in this one. Zero, Zilch, Nada. I wouldn't call it your classic 'Horror', but it is very disturbing, so psychological horror is more like it. Don't eat food while reading this one. Did I mention how Sakura is mentally disturbed beyond help in this one? And Sasuke is obsessed. If these suit your tastes, go ahead.

Writing: 10/10

Characters: 9/10

Plot: 10/10

Flow: Slow

I hope you enjoy this list. Let me know your opinion in comments.

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helnjk · 4 years ago

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Sixth Year - D.M.

Draco Malfoy x fem!reader

Platonic!Blaise Zabini x fem!reader

Requested: yes

Hey if requests are open could you do a prompt#21&50 for Draco.. Could it be a bit of angst and end with fluff? Thanks!

“all you do is make empty promises” “i’m tired of your lies”

Word Count: 2.5k

Warnings: angst, swearing

Summary: 6th year with Draco isn’t turning out how you expected it to be.

A/N: ok 1, i wanted to try writing angst (pls give comments/reviews!! i wanna know how i did) & 2, other than the request, i kind of based this off of one of my fav tiktok acct’s shifting stories aksjdhsadh you can find her here ! i love her tiktoks and she’s what got me into shifting LMAO but anyway ! let me know if you wanna be added to my taglist ! enjoy xx

THIS IS A REPOST BC I THINK TUMBLR DID ME DIRTY WITH THE TAGS

Prompts are in bold

—

Eighth. This was the eighth night you had stayed up until god knows what hour waiting for Draco to show up.

The moon was high in the sky by the time you realized he wasn’t coming yet again. The biting wind rushed past you as you tried to gather as much warmth as possible from the jacket you brought up to the Astronomy tower. Your breath came out in short puffs, white wisps trailing from your mouth out into the chilly night.

With one last glance at the midnight stained grounds, the only light emanating from the moon above, you wrapped your jacket tighter around your body and turned to make it down the stairs. It was a long trek to the Slytherin dorms, which gave your mind more time to spiral. This meant fighting back the prick of tears at the back of your eyes by the time you had reached the dungeons.

The next morning, you found yourself at the Slytherin table barely able to keep your eyes open. You hadn’t gotten much sleep, your mind refusing to stop running the different scenarios with which you imagined Draco must have gotten into causing him to forget your rescheduled plans.

“Y/N?” Blaise’s voice startled you into opening your eyes, having nodded off, leant against your palm.

“Huh?” You murmured, trying to blink the sleep from your eyes, “Sorry did you say something?”

“You alright? You look like you could just drop dead any second,” His eyes scanned yours worriedly, shifting closer to you so that you could have something to lean on.

“Gee thanks Blaise,” A sarcastic drawl came out of your lips, “Just tired. I was up late last night at the Astronomy tower waiting for Draco.”

His brows furrowed at your statement, “Draco? He got to the dorms pretty early last night. Didn’t say he had anything planned with you last night.” Eyes widened at the realization of what he said and he quickly tried to back track, “I mean-That’s not-”

Despite the distinct crack you felt in your chest, you mustered up the faintest of smiles (which probably looked more like a lopsided grimace), “It’s alright, Blaise. Thanks for letting me know.”

The rest of the day passed by you in a blur.

Everyone seemed to notice the melancholy mood that you were in, everyone except for the only person you wished would pay attention.

Being in your sixth year at Hogwarts, you were excited to spend a good chunk of it with your boyfriend. After all, there were no OWLs or NEWTs to worry about (yet), so you assumed that this year would bring more time for you to spend together.

You were wrong. Clearly.

The moment you had stepped off the Hogwarts Express in September, Draco started to spend less and less time with you. It was November now and the less time you found yourself spending with him, the more you noticed that he began to keep things from you. His eyes would shift whenever you would ask him what his plans for the day were or when you questioned who he would be with all day. He never gave you straight answers either.

“Why? What do you have planned for us today?”

“Just off brainstorming for our next date.”

“Obsessed with me, are you? You’re too cute darling.”

No matter how charming he had tried to be with his answers, you could tell something was off with him. None of the so-called plans he came up with ever came to full fruition. Often, you would find yourself waiting for him to arrive, either at the common room to take you to wherever he planned your date to be, or up in the Astronomy tower since that was where you went when you wanted to spend time, just the two of you.

Some nasty rumors had also been circulating Slytherin house. It started when someone overheard Harry Potter speaking to his friends about running into Draco right before a quidditch match, but the catch was that he was in the company of two other girls. Of course, you tried not to let these kinds of things get to you, they were just silly little rumors after all.

Still, these kinds of thoughts plagued you at night when you would go to bed not wrapped in the arms of the person you loved most.

When you brought up these feelings with him, it had only started an argument.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about, Y/N.” Draco said rather harshly after you asked him about the rumors, “Are you implying that I’m cheating on you?”

“No!” You replied immediately, “I just want to know where these rumors are coming from. You’re my boyfriend, I should know what to say when people ask me about it.”

“Then tell them they should be minding their own damn business.”

You didn’t bring it up after that, afraid that if you did, it would cause an even bigger rift between you two.

By the time you had made it back to the common room, it was mostly empty. There were a couple of seventh years trying to get in some extra revising time in the corner, but they mostly left you alone. Not wanting to go up to your dorm yet, you settled on the couch next to the blazing fire instead. By some stroke of luck, Draco came stumbling inside the room as you sunk into the cushions.

“Draco!” You called out, his name slipping from your lips before you even knew you were saying anything.

His eyes registered that you were in the practically empty common room a second slower than usual, “Y/N. Hi love.”

“I missed you last night,” You admitted as he reached you.

A furrow in his brows told you that he didn’t know what you were talking about, “Come again, love?”

For the nth time, his words struck a chord deep in you. You didn’t think it was physically possible, but they added yet another crack to your already broken heart. You cleared your throat in an attempt to push down the lump that had formed, “Uh, I was waiting for you in the Astronomy tower? Because we had plans?”

As if a bucket of cold water dropped on him, his demeanour changed completely in the blink of an eye.

“Oh darling I’m so sorry,” He muttered softly, taking your face in his hands and pressing kisses all around, “I was completely knackered yesterday, I didn’t even think about anything after dinner except sleep. I’m so sorry. What can I do to make it up to you?”

Instead of the calm you usually felt being around Draco, you felt like you were at your breaking point. You couldn’t do this to yourself anymore. It was surprising to realize, that even with the added comfort of being at the receiving end of his kisses, there was still a large part of you that was tired. You couldn’t fall back into his arms after more than a dozen attempts at trying to keep the relationship afloat.

Gently, you pried his hands away from his face and took a deep breath. You could already feel the sting of unshed tears in your eyes as they locked with his, “I don’t think you can do anything to fix this.”

“What-Love, what are you talking about?”

“All you do is make empty promises, Dray.” You whispered, “And I’m tired of setting myself up for disappointment.”

The love of your life was speechless, so you took the opportunity to stand up quickly. “I don’t understand what you’re doing or why you’re being so secretive about it, but find me when you’ve figured out if it’s worth it or not.”

Without waiting for his response, you hurriedly made your way to your dorm room and sparing no glances back in his direction.

A few days after your heartbreaking conversation with Draco, you still weren’t one hundred percent. It didn’t feel like you were ever going to be one hundred percent again. Your only solace was your friendship with Blaise.

For all intents and purposes, he was your best friend. Even before you had started dating Draco, the two of you were thick as thieves.

Oftentimes over the next few days, you found yourselves huddled in a corner of the common room. He would remind you to eat and to do your schoolwork as you went about your days mindlessly.

“C’mon,” He said one night, holding his hand out to you as you were cuddled up against a cushion. You merely raised your eyebrow at him, “Get up, I’ve got somewhere to take you.”

With a sigh, you pushed yourself off the couch and took his hand. It was well past curfew, but it never really bothered the pair of you. Being Slytherins made you resourceful with how you navigated the castle, the easy dynamic between the two of you enabled you to sneak through the shadows unnoticed by anyone who might have been nearby.

“Why are we going to the Astronomy tower?” You whispered as you climbed the seemingly endless staircase.

“Just thought you could use some fresh air.” He answered nonchalantly, “Feels like you’ve kept yourself cooped up in the castle this whole week.”

“That’s awful sweet of you, Zabini,” You teased, the shadow of a smile on your lips.

He shrugged as you got to the top of the tower, “Just don’t like seeing you so sad.”

Few words were exchanged between you two as you leant against the railing of the turret, taking in the view of the grounds in the dim light. The moon was full and high in the sky, and the breeze wasn’t as biting as it was the last time you were here.

Something about being up there in the clear night with Blaise was doing wonders for your aching heart. It might’ve been the fresh, crisp air, it might have been the calming presence of your best friend. You were grateful either way.

As the wind picked up, you huddled closer to Blaise’s warm body. What was it about boys being basically walking furnaces all the damn time?

“Draco’s a prat,” He murmured as he wrapped his arms around you, “I just wanted you to hear that.”

“He’s not though,” You defended weakly, “Something’s up with him, definitely, but I don’t think he’s being a dick on purpose.”

“Yeah but he’s still made you feel like shit.”

You shrugged, “And I let him.”

After a few minutes of silence, you heard the distinct sound of a door swinging open behind you. You craned your neck to see who would be up here at such a late hour when your heart stopped in your chest.

“What’s going on here?” Draco sneered, taking in the sight of you cuddled up at Blaise’s side, “Replaced me already, Y/N? Reckon he’s the reason why we’ve broken up?”

You felt Blaise tense up beside you but paid no mind when your focus was solely on the rage brewing in your chest.

“How dare you,” You seethed, “You have no right to accuse me, we weren’t even doing anything!”

He had the audacity to scoff at your retort, “Sneaking off at nearly midnight, to share a romantic night under the stars? Seems like more than just ‘nothing.’”

Before you could respond, you felt Blaise’s warm hands on your shoulders, “I’m gonna let you handle this one, love.” Blaise whispered in your ear, “He doesn’t deserve anything from you, but I feel like I’ll only make it worse if I stay.”

You nodded slightly.

“Hurt her even more than you have, Malfoy, and you’ll see just what kinds of curses I know how to cast.”

With Blaise making a quick exit and taking away your source of warmth, you crossed your arms in front of your chest and clutched the jacket you had on closer to you.

“You never had a problem with my friendship with Blaise before,” You muttered.

“Because he wasn’t all over you then!” He argued.

“We’ve always been like that and you know it.” You rolled your eyes, “Why are you even up here Draco?”

“So you own the Astronomy tower now?” He huffed, stepping next to you to lean on the railings, “I needed somewhere to think and clear my head.”

Almost as if there was no gaping chasm between the two of you, your bodies slowly inched towards each other until you were shoulder to shoulder. Almost as if the boy standing next to you hadn’t broken your heart with his secrets and his deflection tactics, his presence seemed to calm your elevated heart rate. Almost.

“Are you finally going to tell me what’s been going on with you recently?” The words that escape your mouth are no more than a whisper. You hold your breath in anticipation.

“Nothing’s been going on,” Is all he says in reply.

“Stop lying through your teeth, Draco!” You burst out, your frustrations finally getting the better of you, “I’m tired of your lies. Do you not trust me? Is that it? Because I can help you, you just have to let me in!”

“Of course I trust you! I love you for Merlin’s sake, Y/N!”

You sucked in a breath, all of your resentment seeming to escape your body, “I love you too, Draco,” You whisper, taking his warm hand in your cold ones, “But all of this sneaking around, this hiding, I don’t think I can handle not knowing what you’re up to especially when it’s affecting you this way.”

Draco took a deep shuddering breath, you could practically see the gears turning in his head. “I don’t want to lose you.”

That wasn’t what you expected him to say, “You won’t, you just need to be honest with me.”

He turned to face you, thumbs rubbing gentle circles on your hands, “I can’t tell you exactly what I’m doing,” You opened your mouth to argue but he cut you off with a look, “All I can say is that I love you and I want to protect you. What I’m doing has nothing to do with how much you mean to me, but it’s something I have to do. I just need you to be here, be with me.”

“I don’t understand,” Came your reply.

“I’m saying that I have an important job to do, and I want to be with you, but that means you’ll have to be okay with not knowing everything.”

“You’ll tell me if you need any help though, right?” You all but whispered.

“I’ll tell you if you absolutely need to know,” He nodded slightly.

“Okay,” You were still trying to wrap your head around everything that he said. It wasn’t exactly what you wanted, but it was a good compromise, “And you can’t keep blowing me off. If you want me to be here for you, then you have to do the same for me.”

“I can work with that.” A slow smile graced his pale features and you felt your heart stutter at the sight, you hadn’t seen him look so calm and at ease in a long time.

“Good.” You pressed your cheek against his chest and reveled at the comfort it brought you. He wrapped his arms around you and you could feel yourself melting into his touch.

#Draco Malfoy #Draco Malfoy imagine #Draco Malfoy imagines #Draco Malfoy fics #Draco Malfoy fic #Draco Malfoy x reader #Draco Malfoy reader insert #Draco Malfoy x y/n #Draco Malfoy angst #Blaise Zabini

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lepus-arcticus · 4 years ago

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50.

Life, she’s always been taught, begins at the moment of conception.

It begins, then, at some undetermined hour; on some dappled afternoon on the floor of her living room, her legs twisted tight around Mulder’s narrow, urgent hips. Or it begins on his couch, her sweat-damp back slick against the scarred leather, traces of brewer’s yeast and buttered popcorn lingering on his tongue. A boozy night in the generative lather of the sea. An after-hours liaison in one of the cramped Hoover laboratory bathrooms. A stripped motel queen-size, her bliss-bright eyes shining back at her from the mirror above the dresser. But life does not begin at conception. It begins years and years ago, in an office underground. It begins with his hot palm meeting hers in a lazy handshake, his sylvan gaze tempting her down into the underworld. It begins with Quantico, with Stanford and UMD, with a textbook on the beach, a rabbit’s maggoty corpse, a B.B. pellet in the shredded neck of a garter snake.

Life begins before life, in the dark, secret world of her own mother’s womb. The female fetus, at 20 weeks gestation, already carries a million ova; ova that her body whittles down to 300,000 specimens by the time she reaches biological maturity. Even then, the body only offers up roughly 400 of these ova for fertilization during the body’s reproductive career, sacrificing a handful of failed follicles at every full moon, only presenting one or two perfect beads of potential, primed for transcendence, awaiting the wriggling violence of one similarly tenacious and unlikely spermatozoon.

It is a survivor, this little life. It has escaped the unearthly harvest; it has slipped through the procreative gauntlet. It has been activated by the only person remotely capable of such a thing, gifted a spirit, invited quietly into the endless spiral dance.

Mulder—

Scully fights her way up through the terror, jolting awake with a gasp.

Stiff hospital bed beneath her, monitors sedately beeping, sweat dampening her collar. Her heart hammering, her stomach sour. His screams echoing through the pathways of her nerves.

She recalls so little—it was all light, just a scorching, fulgent light that stirred and fluttered, trying to make figures and faces before melting back into itself over and over. What remains is how she felt when they returned her; gravely violated, afflicted with a bizarre and foreign emptiness, as though she’d been turned inside out and back again, clumsily stitched back into something only slightly resembling the body she used to inhabit.

But God, surely they’d keep him unconscious, surely, please God, at least let him be unconscious—

And why did she play with him like that, why did she tease him so relentlessly, why did she need to hear him say it so many goddamned times, what was she thinking—

And maybe he wouldn’t have gone if she’d just—

She swallows the rising lump in her throat, trying to calm herself, because this is not the right time, because panic is not productive, because she remembers a pregnant Tara telling her that stress is bad for the baby—the baby, my God—

Slowly, she slips a trembling hand over the flat plane of her belly, a callous from handling her gun catching on the thin hospital robe. She tries to feel something, anything, reaching out desperately to any part of herself that might be able to sense the surreal phenomenon taking place within her, any sliver of herself that knows, like any good mother should, that she is not alone.

The blood test has confirmed it. She has the science to back it up. She has done her due diligence, scheduling a dating ultrasound with the help of a bubbly nurse, sending a restless Skinner to the pharmacy for prenatal vitamins and cocoa butter.

But evidence is not enough. For the first time in her life, hard evidence is simply not enough.

Mulder—

Strangers in their office, frenzied as vultures at the kill. Kersh stern and sneering. It is the sickening indignity of Melissa’s sham of a murder investigation all over again—these men don’t want the truth, and they never have. They don’t care if they find him. They don’t respect his work, don’t know his heart, can’t even begin to comprehend the beauty or importance of his radical curiosity. Mulder is, to these people, an anecdote to relay at the Fourth of July block party. He’s a joke.

It’s no wonder the man they chose to head the task force isn’t even a good enough agent to tell a convincing lie. As if Mulder even had the time to sleep around, not to mention the inclination—Mulder, who alone had stolen her back from forces unknown in Antarctica. Mulder, who picked up her dry cleaning and her mail, who’d borrowed and scrawled notes in half the books in her bookshelf. Mulder, who was so obsessed with eating her out that she often had to yank him off by the hair.

Mulder, who’d been asking her to marry him since 1998.

Mulder.

The room is dark, the gel is cold, the ultrasound tech blessedly sedate and straightforward. Scully watches as the image on the screen between them refines itself with every exploratory glide of the wand over her skin, becoming clearer as the tech zeroes in on her uterus and taps at the keyboard, adjusting the picture with tidy, sure movements.

“Placenta,” the woman murmurs in affirmation, as if to herself. Scully watches the static, colourless landscape carefully, closely, her breath suspended.

“And… here... is the fetus.”

A bright smudge floats in a pool of dark night. Indistinct, amorphous, curled in on itself. But one thing is unmistakable: in its center, there is a rhythmic, flickering heartbeat. The scientist within her marvels. The wife within her mourns.

“And you can’t confirm the date of your last period, correct?”

“No,” she breathes, blinking back tears, unable to look away from the soundscape effigy displayed on the screen. “I mean, yes. I mean... it’s, uh, it’s been a little erratic since… I’m a cancer survivor, it’s been… my cycle's been unpredictable for some years.” Scully explains, feeling a small twinge of shame, as though she’s a teenager who’s been deeply irresponsible in her boyfriend’s back seat on homecoming night.

The tech nods, expressionless. She silently takes a few measurements, typing cryptic notes in rapid succession, leaving Scully to grapple with a myriad of emotions she assumed she’d never have the occasion to experience. “Well, Ms. Scully,” the tech says. “I don’t like to leave my patients in the dark—I’d like to assure you that everything is looking perfectly normal. I’ll just slip out and have the doctor look over these to confirm, but to my estimation, it looks like you’re about nine weeks along. We’re all done—feel free to clean yourself up, dispose of the napkin in this bin here—”

Scully wipes her midsection clean, trying to visualize what lies beneath the skin, achingly aware that this still feels like a dream, a nightmare, like anything but real life.

“Congratulations,” the tech offers straightforwardly, before snipping the door shut behind her.

Nine weeks. Nine. Before the jinniyah, before the cigarettes, before even California. Nine weeks.

Mulder—

The acrid burn of bile in her throat, her mother’s cold and empty answering machine. A ghost of her lover walking the halls of her apartment building, or a copy, an imitation.

She absconds to Hegel Place, prays for the first time in years, falls asleep clutching a dirty shirt, hunting for any comforting trace of his cologne, his spiced and musky sweat. She sees Missy from afar in her dreams, shouts her name, watches her walk away. She sees Mulder, metal, light.

When she wakes, she is not alone. It’s clear that in this chase, it is she who is the fox, and John Doggett the hound, calling back to his ruthless, frothing masters for blood while she is trapped in her hollow, trying only to protect her young. Theirs—

Mulder—

Gibson Praise underground, dust in his hair, his fibula snapped. Empty sky stretching over a cruel expanse of sand, dreams upon dreams, shapeshifters twisting, searching, disappearing into the night. She paces the drifting hills like a penitent, seeking forgiveness from the universe—she believes, she believes, she feels him, have mercy—

God, Mulder, please, have mercy—

She shoots a monster who looks like a friend. The enemy cradles her like she is a child.

She dreams, she wakes. She calls out, and Mulder answers her from deep inside her womb, and from somewhere beyond the starline.

- Incrementum

#incrementum #txf fic

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zwowow · 4 years ago

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this might be very triggering so its fine if u dont do it, but kells self harming secretly and em finding out and kells thinks he’s gonna be mad but em is comforting instead

sorry for the ask, im the same anon that went thru a break up and it aint going well

tw: self harm

I’m sorry my love, break ups are rough and it really sounds like ur goin thru it. sorry this took a while! but hopefully you’ve had time to heal a bit between sending this ask nd now.

psa to all I’ve never self harmed, so i’m just hoping this captures the idk headspace? alright :/

He started when he was a teenager. That’s how long he’s been doing this shit. It’s fucking shameful that he hasn’t grown out of it in over a decade, but it’s also one of the only things that’s consistently soothed him. When weed isn’t enough to calm him, or shake him from a spiral of self-loathing, he always comes back to this. Not because it makes him feel better, but because it makes him feel something.

He can focus on the pain and only the physical pain. His emotions, the real world shit he has to deal with, can fall to the side for a moment and he can revel in the hurt. The hurt that he has control over.

That’s a part of it, too. Control. So much of the existential pain he feels is beyond what he himself can change. Everyone gets to have an opinion on him, and regardless if it’s good or bad, he has to know it and internalize it. He has no choice. Time moves on and he can’t control what his past self has done, but the regret eats him alive. His head spins when he thinks about all of the shit that’s wrong in his life that he no longer has the power to change.

But the harm he does himself? Knowingly and methodically? It’s all controlled. He’s got it all under control.

Or at least he did. Recently, he’s had the itch to hurt more and more frequently. There’s so much going on in his life that he’s no longer in control of even the one thing that makes him feel grounded. The old scars and fresh wounds are getting harder to hide. Even on his inked skin, raised bumps and sensitive bruises are easy to find when his boyfriend spends all of his time roaming his hands gently over his body.

But Em can’t find out. Colson refuses to let him. He’d think Colson is pathetic (he is). He’d be disgusted by him (he should be). He’d hate him (but he couldn’t hate him more than Colson hates himself).

He tries not to hurt himself around Em because of this, but sometimes it’s unavoidable. Sometimes he needs it.

Colson sneaks out of bed one night at Em’s place while his boyfriend is sleeping. On his way out, he grabs his small bag that has just a few of the items he uses to hurt himself. His fingers shake around the bag and his breath quickens in his chest.

Ain’t it funny that the shame he feels from doing this just makes him want to do it more?

When he makes it to a bathroom far enough away from Em’s room that he doubts he would make the effort to find him all the way down here, he lays the bag on the counter and opens it up.

This hadn’t started with the razor blades and lighters he keeps in the bag. He’s worked himself here from pulling out his leg hair and scratching his own arms raw just to feel the sting. The older and more well known he got, the more out of control he felt, and from there he made the jump from nervous ticks to genuine self harm.

He used to starve himself, too. He thinks back to only a couple of years ago and picks up the lighter. He could go days without eating, even while on tour. There were times where he’d pass out after shows from the hunger, but he’d write it off to others as exhaustion. That had been one of the most pleasing ways to hurt himself. The gentle build up to physical depletion to match what he felt emotionally was fulfilling in a way he couldn’t possibly explain to anyone.

And that’s why he stopped. Em started to catch on. He started to ask questions no one had asked before. He was obsessed with feeding Colson and keeping him healthy.

Colson started eating regularly because Em would’ve hated to know his not eating wasn’t just absent-minded forgetting. He would’ve been so disappointed to find out it was deliberate starvation. Colson didn’t want to disappoint Em.

He still doesn’t. Colson puts the lighter on the counter and takes out one of his blades, too. Em would hate to see this. He wouldn’t understand.

Inhaling shakily through his nose, Colson looks between his two options for tonight. He leaves the blade on the counter and picks up the lighter. Em is sure to notice if he has a fresh cut. A burn is easier to hide.

He flicks the lighter to life and is deciding where to hold it on his body when he hears the first knock.

“Kells.” Shit. He loosens his grip on the lighter and the flame goes out.

What is Em doing out of bed, and what the fuck is he doing down here?

“Kells,” Em tries again, “You good?”

“I’m fine.” He lies.

“Are you fucking smoking in there?” Outside, Em’s voice grows suspicious. He heard the lighter go on and now he thinks Colson is smoking weed in his bathroom. That would be easier to explain.

After too long of a pause he says, “No.”

Em doesn’t give a warning before he throws open the bathroom door. Colson wants to knock his head into the mirror for not thinking to lock it. He dives for the blade on the counter, but Em is staring right at it.

“What the fuck?” Em looks between Colson and the counter multiple times. It’s a stupid overdramatic response, but he wants to slit his fucking wrists from that look.

Em’s brow furrows. Colson feels sick to his stomach. Em is pissed at him. He’s disgusted by him. He doesn’t know whether to throw him out or call a mental hospital. He hates him. He must be so angry.

“I’m sorry. I didn’t want you to find out. I was trying to hide it. I shouldn’t have done it here. I know it’s fucking sick. I know it’s fucking crazy to cut and burn myself, I know but I...” Excuses and apologies trip over each other running off of his tongue.

“You’re cutting yourself?” Em interrupts him. His intense gaze sweeps over Colson. He’s not disgusted or angry like he’d thought. He’s shocked, confused, and even a bit hurt.

“I... yeah.”

“Why?” A loaded question like that shoots Colson right through the chest. Why? He can hardly answer the question to himself, how is he supposed to explain it to Em?

Em said it himself, he was just clownin’ when talking about cutting himself, how fucked up does someone have to be to actually do that? Colson doesn’t want to explain to Em how fucked up he is.

When he doesn’t answer, Em looks back down at the blade and then at the lighter still in his hand. Kells sees the thousands of things he wants to say and the million questions he wants to ask in his eyes. Finally his eyes set, and Kells braces himself for the next thing to come out of Em’s mouth.

“Don’t do that shit tonight, yeah? Just come back to bed.” The response shocks Colson even more silent than he’d been. Does he still want to know why, or is he just dropping it?

As if reading his mind, Em shrugs, “You can tell me why when you’re ready. Tonight, I just want to cuddle your ass.” He holds out his hand to Colson and laces their fingers together tightly when he grabs on. Em tugs him gently out of the bathroom and down the hall back to his room. Colson leaves the lighter and the blade on the counter.

When they’re back in bed, Em holds him differently than he has before, His arm feels weighted, it presses Colson gently down into the bed, unable to move from the hold. Em holds him from behind protectively and breathes into Colson’s neck. It’s so close it’s almost claustrophobic, but Colson wouldn’t pull away from it even if he could. The urge to hurt himself is immediately replaced by the need to burrow in closer to Em’s grounding touch.

He falls asleep easily, letting the last of his shame and fear at Em’s reaction leave his body without a fight.

In the morning, he goes to clean his stuff up in the bathroom, or to throw it away, but not to use it. When he gets there, the bag, the razor, and the lighter are nowhere to be found. Instead of being anxious at the loss, he feels a bit calmed by it.

This isn’t the end. He won’t be able to stop hurting himself just because Em got rid of a few of his blades and one of his many designated lighters, but it is a start.

Em knows now, he’s looking out for it. And if the way he always acts toward him, from the making sure Colson is eating to the cuddle last night is any indication, he’ll be there when Colson needs it. He’ll take care of him.

#Anonymous #emgk #zwowfic #kind of a rushed ending #but i hope u liked it bebs #also like askbox nd messages are always open for those who wanna talk #tw: self harm

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hazelandglasz · 4 years ago

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Tin-Tanium, A Klaine Advent Calendar

Hi! Yeah, I decided to write all of the Klaine Advent prompts in one story going back the steps of a ten-year anniversary.

Merry Christmas, happy holidays everybody, and I hope you’ll enjoy this compilation!!

Abashed

Over ten years, there are many opportunities for a couple to embarrass themselves.

Kurt has plenty of memories that fit in that category, Blaine too.

Blaine and Kurt together, too.

Whether it’s from their early days (Kurt still can’t believe he used an entire notebook sketching their hyphenated names around hearts) or from the most recent years (Blaine prefers to hide his face in his hands rather than face the recollection of “Glitter Vampire”, no matter how many times Eliott tells him that it’s still a fan favorite), they have managed to feel abashed more often than not.

It’s not like they mind, though.

Being abashed only lasts a moment--the memory, the joy of it, that lasts forever.

Brake

Slow and steady wins the race, doesn’t it.

So, sometimes, even though neither of them wants to slow down, one of them has to pull the brakes.

Oh, it’s not always when they are tearing each other’s clothes apart, get your mind out of the gutter.

(... they do have to slow down their loving romps sometimes, but it’s rarely because they want to and more because of coitus interruptus.)

They learned how to brake to keep their paths aligned; slowing down in their own rush to get all they want out of life in order to get there together.

And winning the race of life together is the only win Kurt and Blaine are interested in.

Careless

Kurt listened attentively, when his father told him to always be careful about his husband’s needs.

Blaine listened too, when Burt told him that though Kurt doesn’t always say it aloud, he has a way of communicating his emotions that Blaine has to “listen” for.

They do care for each other, throughout the years.

But.

But as careful as they are, or try to be, they can also behave in a careless way.

Though they always try their best, neither Kurt nor Blaine can avoid letting their worst lashing out.

Eventually, though, they learn the real lesson behind Burt’s words:

It’s not about never hurting each other--it’s about being able to heal from that hurt together, to talk about it and grow from it, together.

Dispensable

Every Spring, Blaine has the same problem.

Well it’s a problem for Kurt, anyway.

The moment the weather turns for the slightly better, Blaine turns himself into a white tornado, cleaning the apartment from floor to ceiling.

And, without fail, he always tries to hunt for the Dispensables.

“Why, pray tell, is this pile entirely composed of things from *my* side of the closet?”

“Because *you* have almost everything in duplicates.”

“They are collectors! If I ever use them or damage them, I will have a replacement.”

“They are taking too much room!”

“Not as much as your collection of cameras!”

“How dare you.”

Blaine pauses, holding a scarf in one hand and an empty cardbox in the other, before bursting into a fit of laughter.

“Maybe I overdid my impression of Marie Kondo.”

“And maybe I do have a hoarding problem.”

“Maybe we could do that sorting together.”

“Maybe we could find something else to do with all that free time.”

Blaine drops the box on the floor and carefully folds the scarf on the back of the couch.

“I like the way you think.”

“You even put a ring on it.”

Event

One lesson the Hummel-Anderson household always applies: make an event out of every possible situation.

During the first years, it does make sense. They celebrate their successes, their achievements, as one does.

Then, it grows into something almost like a private joke between them: every little source of happiness becomes the reason for a party, a true event, even if it’s just opening a bottle of champagne while they sit on the floor, munching on a bag of chips, just because there is a Golden Girls marathon.

Because when you find things to celebrate with the person you love most, the sad things are just a little bit less sad.

Farm

Blaine wakes up in a jolt, something pulling at his unconscious mind to pull him from his dream.

Maybe it’s the cold spot in the bed next to him, or maybe it’s the grumbling sound coming from the living room.

“Kurt?”

“...”

“Kurt what are you doing?”

“Nothing?”

Blaine comes closer, and Kurt is sitting on the couch with his laptop on his bare knees.

“Are you watching porn? ‘Cause you know you wouldn’t have to hide it from me.”

“Not porn.”

“Okay?”

Kurt closes his eyes before looking away, turning the laptop’s screen toward Blaine. “Don’t laugh.”

“Why would I--oh.”

“I know.”

“I didn’t expect that.”

“I know.”

“Farming Simulator 2010, that’s …”

“I know.

“... vintage, is what I was going to say. Any particular reason you needed to play that game at 2.14 AM?”

Kurt sighs, leaning his head into Blaine’s torso, now that Blaine stands closer. “It relaxes me.”

“Okay.”

“And I have been very tense.”

“Don’t need to tell me.”

“I know; so I wanted to unwind on my own to be a better husband.”

Blaine bends over to press a kiss to the top of Kurt’s head. “Farm away, darling.”

Grey

TW: anxiety

Most of the time, with the help of his therapist and different techniques he has developed over the years, Blaine can keep his anxiety at bay.

But some mornings, it’s not as easy.

Some mornings, the anxious little voice telling him he’s not worth the space he occupies is the loudest in his mind the moment he wakes up.

Some mornings, the sighting of grey skies without even a spot of blue can send him into a downward spiral he can’t seem to shake out of.

But with each passing year, Kurt becomes more attuned to the little physical signs Blaine’s anxiety lets out.

The tension in his shoulders, even as he wakes up, to which Kurt responds by closing his arms around Blaine’s upper body, forcing him to breathe with him until the tension melts away.

The way Blaine doesn’t say a word and doesn’t look directly at Kurt, to which Kurt responds by putting a cup of coffee in front of him and by kissing his temple.

Yes, Blaine’s anxiety is always around.

But with Kurt’s help, Blaine can keep it at bay.

History

Though they share a love for musicals, Kurt and Blaine don’t always have their obsessions in sync.

Unfortunately, it sometimes clashes.

Fortunately, the married couple has found a solution to keep from fighting over songs.

Medleys meet the Exquisite Corpse.

“I don't wanna talk

About things we've gone through

Though it's hurting me

Now it's history”, Blaine sings.

“History has its eyes on youuuu,” Kurt responds.

“You can dance

You can jive

Having the time of your life

See that girl

Watch that scene

Dig in the dancing queeeeeeen.”

“Hey not fair, there is no queen in Hamilton!”

“Hey, you’re the one who keeps insisting that Eliza is Queen!”

“True.”

Inconclusive

Around the seventh year mark, they wonder if they should … well, expand their couple’s horizon.

It’s a secret to none of their friends that the Anderson-Hummel have insane chemistry with one Starchild.

One evening, using the pretext of celebrating the comeback of the cronut on the foodie scene with one too many bottle of champagne, the three of them end up in bed together.

Some lubricant, condoms, giggles and panted names later, Kurt looks over the stunned figure of their friend to brush his fingers through Blaine’s sweaty curls.

“So?”

“Inconclusive.” Blaine sighs. “Yet.”

Eliot snorts between them. “Round number …?”

“Who’s counting?”

Join

A good way to keep the spark in its first meet glow is also to surprise each other.

One evening, Blaine comes home to Christmas lights suspended in the whole apartment.

“What the …”

“Welcome, sir,” Kurt says, wearing the Ringmaster’s outfit from his run as Barnum in Broadway’s Greatest Showman. “Would you join me for a very special evening?”

“I would,” Blaine says, smiling as he puts his hand in Kurt’s, and feeling his cheeks burning when Kurt brushes his lips against Blaine’s knuckles.

The evening is very special, Blaine tied to the armchair while Kurt takes off his whole outfit and feeds him bits of cheese and fruits and toasted bread.

Knit

“I’m bored.”

“I know. Why don’t you learn a craft?”

“Remember the last time I tried to learn a craft, like you put it?”

They both turn to the potter’s wheel they recycled into a coffee table. “Right. Maybe something less …”

“Space consuming?”

“Complicated.”

“What about knitting?”

“There’s an idea.”

Two days later

“Wha--”

“What?”

“Mon chéri, when we said knitting, I thought it would involve a couple of yarn balls and some needles.”

“This is yarn.”

“No, it’s not.”

Yes it is.

Learn

In a couple, some things come naturally, as easy as breathing.

Loving each other, for example.

For Kurt and Blaine, it’s knowing that whatever the storm, the tide will always bring them back together.

And some things are learned, through time and Life lessons.

What to cook as comfort food, for example.

For Kurt and Blaine, it’s finding out that they needed to be apart to be better for each other.

Some lessons are hard-learned, but eventually, they feel like they have always been known.

Meet

Dan is ready to slip under the table to take his ritual Christmas nap when Cecilia asks the question.

“How did you two meet?”

Now, all Dan can do is groan. “Nooo,” he moans, “why did you ask that?”

“Excuse you,” Kurt says, ruffling his son’s hair. “Don’t you like the way we met?”

“I heard that story at least 221 times,” he says, dropping his head to the table. “Besides, it’s just weird, when you think about it.”

Cecilia cocks one eyebrow at him. “Now you have to tell me.”

“Let me--”

Dan holds up his hand to stop his father in his tracks. “Nah, nah, nah, let me, because they will tell you that it’s so romantic, but in reality, Dad went to spy on Papa and Papa lied to Dad about a shortcut …”

Nip

“What is that thing sitting in that... thing?”

“That is a cat and she is sitting in a basket I knitted, thank you very much.”

“Since when do we have a cat?”

“Since Mrs Gimm’s had a litter and this one picked me.”

“Ah.”

“She went for me like she always knew me.”

“Aww.”

“And then she nipped my fingers.”

“That explains the band-aids.”

“Maybe.”

“So you decided to bring a feral cat into our house with a newborn because the only thing you knitted is that basket?”

“Feral, come on, maybe that’s an overkill, look how sweet she--Ouch!”

“Here, another kitten band-aid. Let me try.”

“Oh right, you’re a big beast tamer, right?”

“...”

“Is that her purring?”

“Either she’s purring or the neighbor just started a plane engine.”

“Oh yes, you’re purring, you little princess you …”

“Ahem.”

Opinion

Any couple counsellor will tell you this:

If you want a relationship to last, the most important thing to do is compromise, to make sure that both parties are happy.

Any couple will tell you this:

Some opinions are better than others. The only thing you can do, before choosing a hill to die on, is take a step back, breathe in and out a couple of times and--

“That’s so stupid it’s a wonder you can still breathe and talk at the same time!”

“I can’t believe you actually think that! What’s between your ears, lukewarm water?”

--start World War Three over the importance of the Beatles versus the Rolling Stones, I guess.

Possible

More seriously though, finding a middle ground is important, in any relationship. And the way to that middle ground can sometimes be summarized in one word.

“Possibility.”

Do you think you could agree to let me cook tonight, even though you say I burn everything?

Maybe.

May I buy regular milk instead of almond, because it gives me stomach aches?

You may.

Isn’t it your turn to change Kitty’s litter?

...Possible.

In just a few words, you can save your relationship from self-destructing, isn’t that something?

Remarkable

Over the years, through thick and thin, through storms and easy flows, the relationship formed by Kurt and Blaine only strengthens.

A fact that seems remarkable for a lot of their friends.

Their New York friends, I should say, since their Ohioan friends are not surprised to see them growing only stronger and more in love as time passes by, leaving them more united than they ever were when they were younger.

Is their relationship remarkable? Of course.

But not because they still look at each other with sparkles in their eyes, especially when they think nobody is watching.

No, it’s spectacular because it reminds everyone lucky enough to be with them that Love does exist.

Sisters

Over the years, Kurt and Blaine consider that they are the ones lucky enough to have been graced by the many women who entered their lives and remained there as chosen sisters.

Mercedes, Tina, Santana, even Rachel, of course, soul sisters who were meant to support them and challenge them to become better men.

Marley, Unique, Kitty, Jane--younger sisters who help both men to grow into mentors and future parents for Cecilia.

Lissa, Annie, Agnes--sisters of all ages who learn from them and teach them in return what they learned during their own lives until they met the couple.

Glee Club had taught them that family didn’t have to be born from blood, but life brought them a constellation of sisterhood that surrounds them and protects them, in a way, from themselves, from ever thinking they cannot get better.

Tub

“Blaine, I know that you’re really going Method for that role, but could you stop with the 1980, 1990 lingo?”

“As if!”

Kurt sighs before deciding to move on. “Do you like that ice cream? It’s from the new shop down the block.”

“It’s da bomb, hubby.”

“‘Da bomb’, really?”

Blaine has the decency to look slightly bashful. “Overdoing it?”

“Just a tad.”

“I’ll keep it to the theater, then.”

“Tubular.”

Ugly

When one uses his body as its professional tool, one is very peculiar about the way they see themselves.

And sometimes, as strong-minded the individual may be, societal expectations can become too heavy.

“Now I get it. I don’t get parts because I’m ugly.”

“Who said that?”

Kurt slams the bathroom cupboard closed, shaking his head at his own reflection. “I don’t need anyone to say it,” he seethes, “it’s obviously why none of the directors I auditioned for ever called back!”

Blaine comes to lean against the bathroom’s door frame. “Kurt …”

Kurt bends his head. “Blaine, don’t start. I know, deep down, that it’s not the reason, and that I’m not ugly. But right now,” he adds, turning his head toward Blaine without meeting his gaze, “that knowledge is buried deep, deep down.”

“Okay.” Blaine stretches close to Kurt, pecking his cheek. “Take all the time you want. But if you need my help digging for proof that you are quite the opposite of ugly, I’m right here. If you want to mull over it in silence, I can let you do it, and just stay here by your side, or walk around the block.”

“No. Stay.” Kurt finally looks up, leaning his forehead against Blaine’s. “I don’t feel so bad when you’re around.”

Vanish

Sometimes, when you are a couple of married actors, you have to accept that your husband is going to get a job when you don’t.

“I got the job!”

“See, I knew you were going to get a break! Which job?”

“The ad one!”

Blaine cocks his head to the side. “Which one? The one for the hotels?”

“No, the one for the detergent. You know, the pink one?”

“Vanish?”

“Yeah, that’s the one.” Kurt chuckles. “I should try and remember it before the shoot!”

“I’m very proud of you,” Blaine says, pulling Kurt against him for a kiss. “Want to rehearse your text?”

“I would, if you weren’t unbuckling my be-hey!”

“Look, I can make your pants just … vanish.”

“You’re terrib--oh, wow.”

Worthless

Along the years, along the moves, along the different steps in Life, people gather things.

Not necessarily the most expensive things in the world, just mementos.

Little things, really, that most people would discard as just worthless junk.

But for Blaine, for Kurt, those little things are more precious than any of the things they bought once they started to get financially comfortable.

Like ticket stubs and Playbills from the shows they saw together.

Or like a ring made out of gum wrappers.

Yard

Speaking of financial comfort.

Once they became a household name, and once their student loans were reimbursed, both Blaine and Kurt agree.

If they are to be a family, if they are to raise a kid (or many), they need to buy a house.

It takes them a while, but they manage to save enough money to put the down payment on a cute little house in Jericho, a house with a luxurious yard where Kitty Cat can pretend to be the tiger she once was, and where their babies will be free to climb the trees and run around and drive their little bicycles or whatever.

“Quite the white picket fence, Hummel.”

“Anderson Hummel, and yes, so what.”

Santana rubs her very round belly. “Not complaining, nor criticizing. Just observing. I didn’t picture you as Wisteria Lane-adjacent.”

Kurt shrugs. “Nothing Desperate about wanting a good environment to raise a family.”

Zealous

As they reach their tenth year anniversary, Kurt and Blaine feel like they have reached a point in their relationship where their ship is sailing on its own, so to speak.

They have found their groove, they can still surprise each other while knowing each other’s habits and needs, and they have their baby.

Who cries every night.

Blaine is at his wits end looking for a solution to soothe his son’s teething pain, but nothing works.

Or so it seems.

“This here's a tale for all the fellas

Tryin' to do what those ladies tell us

Get shot down 'cause you're over zealous

Play hard to get, females get jealous …”

The sound of the song is the only sound around the house.

No cries, no whimpers.

Just Kurt, apparently “bursting a move”.

“Kurt?”

The song stops, along with one of Dan’s hiccups that announce a storm.

“Keep going, keep going!”

Kurt hesitantly returns to the song, coming into view as he bounces Dan in his arms.

“Young MC, really?”

In the same melody, Kurt replies between his teeth. “I don’t know what came over me, but I just started singing while he was crying and he sto-opped.”

“Magic.”

“Quite.”

“We need to give our thanks to Shuester, uh?”

“Over my dead body.”

#sometimes i write #klaine advent #todaydreambelievers #klaine

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aros001 · 3 years ago

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Going in blind: Watching season 3 for the first time. Random thoughts.

Episode 1: I know in the original series She-Ra was the sister of He-Man so I'm curious how much of that will be carried over to this series. Not saying He-Man has to make an appearance, same as how Batman didn't need to show up in Teen Titans. That was Robin's story, not his, and similarly this is Adora's story, not Adam's. Regardless, it makes sense why Hordak was so annoyed with the baby Adora in Shadow Weaver's flashbacks. To SW, there was something different and special about the baby, but to Hordak, whom seems familiar with the world before Mara separated Etheria from the rest of the universe, including Eternia potentially, Adora is just another "First One" child like he's seen many times before. Special in comparison to those who only know Etheria.

Great clap-back from Catra to Hordak, and not entirely unfounded. It's debatable how much he actually cares about conquering Etheria. He has others leading his forces in his war yet all his focus is on his portal creation.

According to Entrapta, productivity of the Horde is up 400% ever since Catra became Hordak's 2nd in command. I wondering how much of that is Catra's direct doing? Is she genuinely just that good of a commander? Is it because she's properly delegating and Scorpia has been handling most of the load? Or is this just because it's in comparison to Shadow Weaver? Entrapta said Catra's focus on First Ones' tech has been greatly aiding them and SW definitely focused more on magic, which was an aid mostly to herself since everyone else in the Horde seems to fight only with weapons and technology. And most of what she saw of SW while she was Hordak's 2nd was her being obsessed with bringing back Adora rather than fighting the war.

Episode 2: Let's see... Hordak's easily an adult and Entrapta is...[checks google] late twenties, early thirties. Oh good, then let's sail this ship!

But yeah, that was a heck of a backstory for Hordak. This reminds me of a video by a Youtuber named Savage Books comparing the villain Steppenwolf in the theatrical and Snyder Cut versions of Justice League and how, while he still wasn't a great villain, just a small addition made him a much better villain, that being a failure in his past and the desire just to go home. And in this case, Hordak is the much better, or at least way more developed, version of that. One of many clones of Hordak Prime but having a defect that labelled him a failure and had him cast out to Etheria, a "backwards world" as he's called it before. If he can conquer Etheria, perhaps by building a portal that'll bring forward Prime's army, he believes that'll prove to Prime that he is not a failure and that he can return home to rejoin his forces. Just this bit of backstory adds SO MUCH to Hordak, including new insights on his past interactions, and keeps him from being a flat character like theatrical version Steppenwolf. His lack of tolerance for failure makes sense when he himself is trying to prove that he's not. It gives him compelling motivation to want to conquer Etheria beyond just power and greed. Not motivation you're meant to agree with but one you can still understand.

I like the story with Huntara too. It's a nice little tie-in to something Adora was talking about with Glimmer and Bow last episode. Adora defected from the horde, not because she was different but rather very much in spite being very much like every other soldier there. She wanted to believe Shadow Weaver may have at least some goodness in her too and now we have Huntara as a fellow defector who realized the evils of the Horde, even if she chose to stay out of the war entirely after.

Episode 3: I legit thought Catra stabbed the goat lady for a second.

After Scorpia asking her why don't they just stay in the wastes I'm seeing a bit of a parallel between Catra and Hordak. They've both found a place where they can be the top dog, where they can do and have basically anything they want; her with the wastes and him with the Horde. They can be happy. ...But there's still this pull they're feeling to somewhere else. Catra back to the Horde and Hordak back to Prime. Because they feel they have to prove something; prove that they're not failures. They could be happy but they can't let go.

And that scene between Adora and Catra at the end. That was such a great line read from Catra's actor. "She left me for you. Everything that's happened is because of you." I got chills.

Minor note: While I'm only judging off the Mara hologram, which didn't have color, I do think the She-Ra outfit looks better with pants than shorts like Adora's She-Ra form. I think it makes it look sleeker, if that makes any sense.

Episode 4: Catra's spiral has turned into a drill and its taking her down as far as she can go. Though something I had to a laugh a little at myself over was that my biggest "Catra, no!" reaction wasn't to her wanting to open the portal but rather when she lied to Hordak and said Entrapta let the princesses in. She was actually a positive influence on Hordak's life and Catra with one move just destroyed that relationship and all progress Hordak had been making.

I'm guessing there's going to be some kind of long-term effect from Shadow Weaver continuously siphoning off Glimmer's magic. The woman is basically a parasite and the magic she uses is very different from the kind Glimmer does. I can't believe it never occurred to me that since Shadow Weaver trained Glimmer's father there might be a connection there between the two of them later in the story. While we don't know about anything that might've happened after she left, SW clearly had enough affection for Micah still to not kill him. I could see her trying to take Glimmer on as a student later like she did him.

Episode 5: There is something kind of hilarious about it being Scorpia's jealousy of Catra and Adora's closeness that causes her to be the first one after Adora to pick up that something is off.

11 is my favorite of the Doctor Who Doctors so naturally I'm comparing all this to the crack in Amy Pond's bedroom wall. Whatever goes in gets forgotten about and basically never existed. Though does that mean Bright Moon isn't going to remember the Horde? Basically that entire place got sucked up in the collapsing reality. There shouldn't be at war anymore because their enemy literally no longer exists.

Adora and Catra had their own little Star Trek 3 moment there.

Adora: "If we don't help each other, we'll die here!"

Catra: "Perfect! Then that's the way it shall be!"

Catra's just so far down her spiral she doesn't even care about getting her own win, just so long as Adora doesn't get one, despite just minutes ago clearly loving having Adora back in her life and on her side, to the point was trying to resist remembering the old reality. Her "perfect" world was them together again but when given the chance (another of many. I love those cuts to their past woven in there) she slapped the hand away.

I'm sure I'm wrong but I'm starting to theorize Madam Razz is actually Mara and just at some point went kind of crazy and started thinking as and Mara were two different people.

Episode 6:

"You are everything I ever wanted in a son. This... This is everything I ever wanted in a life. ...But I've got responsibilities, Van. And...I have to...go now."

-Superman, Justice League Unlimited: For the Man Who Has Everything

That was my favorite episode of JLU, where Superman is trapped in this world that isn't real but still perfect in every way, and the only way out was to give up everything he'd ever wanted, including a son he remembers watching grow up, even if it never really happened. With a similar premise, this definitely helped elevate Angela up a bit for me, whom I was kind just meh with before. I didn't dislike her but I didn't really care much for her either. This episode gave her a lot to work with though, with the heavy sacrifice she made. Not just saying behind to pull out the sword but just simply forcing herself to accept her husband is gone and not coming back. I was right that they wouldn't remember the Horde, but I definitely didn't think of the full effects of them never existing. They never exist, Bow never becomes a rebel instead of a scholar like his dads wanted. They don't exist, Micah never dies in battle against them. Glimmer gets to grow up with her father in her life. Everyone, most especially Angela, has to reject everything they would love to be real in favor of what actually is.

I'm guessing we're going to have Shadow Weaver taking advantage of this situation, trying to act like a teacher and mother-figure to Glimmer now that she's basically a orphan.

I talked before about how Catra and Hordak seem to have a parallel between them, especially regarding failure. Catra seems like she has a very hard time accepting her own failures and mistakes and thus why she more or less uses Adora as a mental scapegoat for all of it. Nothing is ever really her fault, it's Adora's, or Shadow Weaver's, or Hordak's. It makes for a great moment when Adora finally punches back, both literally and figuratively. She's not going to accept responsibility for Catra's actions anymore. She gave Catra every chance to make the right choice and she didn't, so now she has to finally live with the consequences. Heck of a glare She-Ra gave Catra at the end. Very much a "If I ever see you again..." and it certainly scared Catra, at least for a moment.

Now, someone go save Entrapta from Beast Island!

Season 3 verdict: Easily the best season thus far. I know this was technically the second half of season 2 but even in comparison to the full season 1 there was just so much that happened in this, so much that got revealed, and so, so many moments of emotion or tension. Weirdly I feel kind of disappointed that Hordak Prime is probably going to come in now and be the new big villain. I really like our Hordak's motivation and Prime seems like he might just be the generic conqueror for power that Hordak seemed like he was going to be at first. Not saying those types can't work. I love All For One from My Hero Academia and Frieza from Dragon Ball. Those guys are pure evil and selfishness, but they also have a captivating presence/charisma to them.

Naturally, since I bring her up the most out of all the characters, I'm very curious to see what happens with Catra now. She's basically nuked every positive relationship she had with anyone. Entrapta's gone, she threatened Scorpia, Hordak's not going to trust anyone including her anymore now that he thinks Entrapta's betrayed him, and Adora firmly sees her as an enemy. She has no one (those under her direct command don't count) and it's entirely her own fault.

Original Reddit post: https://www.reddit.com/r/PrincessesOfPower/comments/o0trfz/going_in_blind_watching_season_3_for_the_first/

#she ra #she ra spop #random thoughts #reddit repost

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tripleaxeldiaz · 4 years ago

Text

all was golden when the day met the night

chapter 4/5

read on ao3

start from the beginning

A few weeks go by, and things are good. Eddie’s tattoo is pretty much healed, and he already finds himself absentmindedly tracing it when his thoughts are too loud, or he feels the wisps of anxiety starting to pull at him. Chris is obsessed with it, fingers roaming it as much as Eddie’s, and he even lets him color it in, just like he does with Buck’s ink.

Buck is good as ever, still in the shop every day, his bright eyes and brighter smile still main players in Eddie’s dreams. Every week, he gives him bouquets confessing his love, a small part of him hoping Buck figures it out on his own, a bigger part knowing he never will. He tells Hen as much one day, and she just levels him with an unimpressed glare.

“He’d figure out your feelings a lot easier if you talked to him.”

Eddie looks at her, bewildered. “But then he’d know.”

One day she’s going to roll her eyes so hard at him, they’ll get stuck in the back of her head.

Maybe he hasn’t told Buck everything, but something still feels different between them. Looks feel more charged, hands linger longer, like neither of them actually wants to let go of the other. Maybe it’s because Eddie has stopped fighting his feelings so much, has let them stretch out in his chest instead of keeping them in a ball. It’s not enough to convince him that everything wouldn’t immediately fall apart if he told Buck how he felt, but it’s a little easier to breathe, at least. A little easier to be open and comfortable with his love for Buck, even if he still can’t say as much out loud. When Buck’s eyes dance over his face a little more intensely than normal, he’s not as ripped in half by naive hope and blind terror as he once was. He still thinks he might have the smallest chance, he’s just not sure what to do with it yet.

But, overall, things are good.

Until suddenly, they’re not.

~~~~~~~~~~

He gets the call on Monday for three standing spray arrangements for a funeral the following week. He gives his condolences as he takes down the woman’s info, asking for the funeral home and the name of the deceased to make sure they get to the right place. When she gives the name — Beth Hubbel, her daughter — there’s a spark of recognition.

He searches for her obituary later, feels his blood run cold when he finds it.

Staff Sergeant Elizabeth Hubbel, United States Army Special Forces. Killed in action in Iraq on her third tour of duty.

They were in Afghanistan together during his second tour. They weren’t friends, but they knew of each other, well enough to nod in passing. And while he’s of course devastated for her family, that’s not what really sets him off. It’s the chilling voice that rises up from the very back of his mind as he reads her accomplishments and the names of the people she left behind, whispering in his ear like broken glass That could have been you. It should have been you. Why wasn’t it you?

He hasn’t gone down this hole, his darkest one, in years. That doesn’t make the spiral any slower.

He tries to hold it back as much as he can — for Chris’s sake, for work’s sake, for everyone — but the dam is cracked and the pressure is crushing. The voice never stops, constantly whispering about how he doesn’t deserve any of this, this life he’s built for himself. He had people relying on him, and he let them down, let them die a fiery death in the desert instead of coming home like he’s sure they promised their families they would. Why should he get to live out his dreams when they didn’t? He lies awake at night, seeing nothing but a burning helicopter when he closes his eyes, feels shooting, phantom pains in his shoulder, like the bullet is tearing freshly through it. He’s terrified of the nightmares he knows are lurking in the shadows, waiting for him, so he just stays up. Fights it until the exhaustion smothers him into a quick, dreamless sleep.

He gets worse and worse as the week wears on, pressure pushing on him inside and out, making it hard to move and impossible to breathe. His “normal” facade that’s hiding the cracks takes too much out of him, so he withdraws as much as he can without being suspicious. If people notice something is wrong, they’ll want to help, and this is not something he’s willing to expose anyone to. The toxic gas of guilt is for him alone. It swirls around him everywhere he goes, soaking into his skin and breaking him down until he’s so fragile that the lightest breeze could break him apart if it blows the wrong direction.

They notice. He knows they do.

Hen mans the front desk single handedly, swoops in to greet customers before Eddie can muster the energy to walk out of the back room. Buck chatters even more about his clients when he visits, filling the silence that surrounds Eddie like a vacuum. Even Chris snuggles closer to him during movie night, his warmth the only thing Eddie registers as he stares listlessly at the TV.

They don’t pry, and he’s grateful, because that’s exactly what he wants, but he also feels like screaming. He’s face to face with the walls he put together with his own hands to protect the people he loves, and all he wants to do now is tear them down. They’re keeping the murky water in as it rises and rises, and Eddie can’t swim on his own for much longer.

But he keeps going. He has to. He swims and he stews because it’s not fair for him to ask people to tear down the prison he built for himself.

~~~~~~~~~~

It’s the last delivery of the day on Friday, and it takes every ounce of mental and physical energy he has to keep his hands steady and enter the funeral home. The funeral director shows him to the room, already decorated with pictures of Beth in and out of uniform, Army crests, an American flag draped over the closed casket.

He tries to keep his focus only on the flowers as he sets them up, but his eyes keep drifting to the pictures — Beth smiling with her platoon, with her parents, kissing her wife on their wedding day. She was someone, she’d had a whole life ahead of her, and she was gone. When Eddie was overseas, he had a marriage falling apart, a son that barely knew him, and no plans for a future when he was back on U.S. soil. And he survived. How is that fair?

He finishes setting up, hands shaking because he’s running out of strength to keep them still. He stands by the casket, contemplates kneeling and saying a prayer. It’s been a while — he’s not sure if he remembers how to, or if anyone is even listening. Would they do anything if they could hear him? Does he deserve to have his prayers answered, even if they’re for someone else?

He just places his hand on the flag instead, whispers, “I’m sorry,” and all but bolts out the door to the truck. He turns the AC all the way to cold, turns the music all the way up, tries his best to drown his senses before they can drown him.

It’s not enough.

By the time he makes it back, the shop is dark and empty. He has a text from Hen letting him know she closed up early and took Chris home with her for a sleepover with Denny. He leans against the wall, sliding down to sit on the floor, no energy to even make it up the stairs to crawl into bed. His mind is a hurricane, loud and destructive, and he’s feeling so much that he can’t feel anything at all, he’s just numb.

There’s a soft knock on the back door, and Eddie peels himself off the ground to answer it, figures it’s Chris coming back for a video game. He tries to ignore the winds picking up in his head, the whispers that seem to be getting louder, schools his face into something normal before opening the door.

It’s not Chris, though.

It’s Buck.

He’s got his hands in the pockets of his leather jacket and he looks nervous, shifting his weight from side to side. He looks up at Eddie as the door opens, and they just stare at each other, long enough for the storm to keep brewing, strong enough now that Eddie doesn’t think he’ll be able to hold it off much longer.

Buck clears his throat, scratches the back of his neck. “Hey. I, uh— you’ve just seemed really off all week? And I saw you walk in as I was leaving and I just...you looked wrecked. You still do.” His eyes scan over Eddie’s face, like he can see right into him, see the water getting closer and closer to covering Eddie completely.

“Are you okay, Eddie?” Buck asks.

No one’s asked him that in a long time, and he hasn’t asked himself that in even longer. He opens and closes his mouth, trying to figure out the best way to articulate himself that isn’t just an incoherent scream. He feels hot tears fill his eyes that he’s somehow held off until now. It’s too much — the memories, the storm, Buck looking at him with genuine concern in his eyes. His body crumples, finally giving into the pressure, but Buck’s arms are around him before he hits the floor, strong and secure. The scream comes out, sobs quickly following.

He holds onto Buck like a life raft.

Buck maneuvers them to the ground, and holds Eddie tightly, hand rubbing up and down his back, through his hair. He’s shushing him quietly, whispering things Eddie can’t hear as he lets everything go, lets the storm rage on in hopes that it’ll dissipate quickly and with minimal damage.

It’s minutes or days later when he finally runs out of tears. His throat hurts, his face feels puffy, and he feels the dampness of Buck’s shirt from where his face was pressed into his chest. He leans back slowly where he’s sitting in between Buck’s legs, hands scrubbing his face as he takes a few deep breaths. He’s never broken down like that, especially not in front of someone else, and he’s exhausted and embarrassed and just wants to run away, hide in his bed for the weekend or the rest of time.

Buck, however, shows no signs of moving. His hands are on Eddie still, one on his back, one on his side, still holding him close while Eddie gets his bearings again. He feels the warmth of them through his shirt, and it feels as good and as safe as he always imagined it would. Still, he keeps his head in his hands for a little while longer, breaths finally evening out. He doesn’t want to look him in the eye yet, doesn’t want to see the pity because he knows he won’t be able to handle it.

When he does finally look up, Buck just looks worried still, tinged with empathy rather than pity. If his heart wasn’t already smashed to dust, it would crack for Buck, too.

He slowly disentangles himself from Buck until they’re sitting next to each other, shoulder to shoulder, leaning against the door. He doesn’t know what to do — he wants Buck to stay, he wants to tell him to run, he wants to move on from whatever these past few days have been, fix the storm damage and get back to normal.

He sees Buck turn his head out of the corner of his eye, feels his gaze on the side of his face. He stares resolutely at the floor — maybe if he’s still enough, looks put together enough, Buck will take it at face value and leave while he can.

Of course, he doesn’t.

“Do you want to talk about it?” he asks instead.

And for a minute, he does. He wants to get rid of whatever walls are still left in his head and let Buck in, let him see every decrepit, rotting part of him because he knows, he knows, that Buck will be able to see past all that. He’ll see the good person that Eddie himself hasn’t seen since he left for the desert, and he’ll be able to coax him back into the light.

It’s only for a minute, though. Because then the whispering comes back, roaring in his ears, reminding him that person is gone, and whatever shell is left is not enough, for Buck or for anyone else.

He still can’t ignore the voices, so he just slowly shakes his head. “It’s okay. I’ll be fine.”

Buck keeps staring at him, hands twitching before he slowly reaches over the space between them and grabs his hand. “Talking helps, Eddie. It’s a lot better than keeping everything bottled up like this.”

Eddie bristles at that, the same line he’s heard for years. He knows Buck means well, he always means well, everyone means well when they ask him to talk, but no one gets it. This is just the tip of the iceberg with Eddie. There’s so much darkness swirling underneath that they can’t see, that Eddie will never, ever let them see. Not his parents, not Abuela, not Chris, and not Buck. Especially not Buck. He loves him too much to poison him like that.

He can feel the walls starting to rebuild now that his brain is back online. He doesn’t want to push Buck away like this, knows the small chance he thought they had will disappear if he does, but it’s for Buck’s own good. He’ll see that one day, he thinks.

He stares at their clasped hands before sighing and slowly pulling away. “You don’t need to worry about it. Really, I’ll be alright.”

“Hen told me about the order for this week, at the funeral home. I’m sure that wasn’t easy for you.”

“Buck—”

“Eddie, please, just—”

“You can’t help me,” he says, louder than he means to, as he finally looks Buck in the eye.

Buck looks startled for a minute before his jaw sets, his eyes hardening in determination. “No, I can��t if you don’t let me.”

Eddie scrambles to stand, needs to get away from Buck, from his warmth, everything he doesn’t deserve. “I can’t, okay? It’s— It’s too much. I can barely get a handle on it on my own. You shouldn’t have to worry about it, too”

“I think I can decide that for myself, thanks,” Buck says as he stands too, arms crossing.

“I’m serious, Buck.”

“So am I.”

“Maybe I don’t want your help, did you ever think about that?”

It’s a total lie, but he’s desperate. He’ll do anything to steer Buck away from this. His anger, his sadness, it’s out in the open now, curling around the ceiling in tendrils, threatening to suffocate them both.

Buck freezes, looks like he’s about to keep arguing, but he just deflates instead. He looks at Eddie for another long minutes, and there’s that pity he’s been waiting for. The sadness for Eddie and the mess that he is. Finally, he hears, he finally figured out you’re not worth it.

Buck makes a move toward him, like he did the night he got his tattoo, and Eddie braces for the worst — a slap, a punch, anything to let out the frustration he’s no doubt caused. Instead, Buck just grabs his hand again.

He doesn’t pull away this time.

“I need you to listen to me, okay?” he says, squeezing Eddie’s hand until he knows he has his attention. “You’re my best friend, Eddie. I care about you and Chris more than pretty much anyone in the world. I won’t force you to tell me anything but...I want to help. I want to help you handle it. All of it.” He lets his hand go and walks towards the door, turning back before crossing the threshold. “Just remember I’m here for you, okay? No matter what.”

Eddie watches the door shut as Buck leaves, and he’s alone, again, still trying not to drown.

#eddie diaz #evan buckley #buddie #buddie fic #9-1-1 fic #9-1-1 fox #the infamous chapter where eli threatened to burn my house down and also bribed me #i'm sorry!!#it hurt me to write too!!#now y'all get to feel the pain!!#last chapter next week!!#the flower shop #ficcery

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gofordrakgo · 4 years ago

Text

Friends

“ ‘Are you going to watch a movie?’ Shego glanced behind her to see Drakken standing in the doorway. It always threw her off to see him in clothing that differed from his usual lab coat. Seeing him now in black jeans and a light blue T-shirt made her blink. ‘I don’t know. I guess so,’ she lied. She wasn’t about to tell him that she’d only been looking through the movies because she’d been thinking about him.”

Shego never really spent much time thinking about Drakken. Sure, she wondered what fruitless plan to take over the world he would come up with next, and sure she cursed his name every time he got them caught, and sure she always worried about him a bit while they were in prison. But she never thought about him.

She sat on the couch in the common area of the lair, staring at the medal he’d been given after the Lowardian invasion. It glinted in the sunlight, shining and iridescent above the fireplace. She hated it. That sounded harsh, but in a way that was the truth. She couldn’t possibly be more proud of Drakken, but she still hated what the medal represented. Not their overnight change from villains to heroes, though it surprised her she found she didn’t really care that much either way. No - rather, what upset her was that every time she looked at it she remembered once again that she almost lost him that night.

They’d had more than their fair sure of rough patches in life. She’d spent hours patching him up, cleaning out cuts and icing bruises, and he had spent as much, if not more, time doing the same for her. It didn’t matter. None of it compared to the way she felt as she watched him disappear into the sky when she could do nothing more than uselessly reach a hand out towards him and listen to his screams. That moment damn near broke her. It hurt her enough to go looking for Kim freaking Possible for help.

For the first time since she’d met him, she realized that she could lose him. He’d become a sort of permanent fixture in her mind. Something that she’d grown so used to that being without it would be bizarre. Leaving him for quick vacations was one thing. The idea of never getting him back was another thing entirely.

Every time she looked at that damn medal it reminded her that anything could happen to him, that she could lose him at any time. And those thoughts spiraled into what she would do if something did happen - if he left, or died, or was injured so badly that he’d never be the same again.

Hell, he’d mutated in front of her eyes and, although it freaked her out, she hadn’t been particularly frightened. Her only response - after they were sure he wasn’t going to drop dead where he stood - was to tease him for the petals that bloomed around his neck. What if mocking him, purposefully upsetting him, had been the last thing she’d ever done?

When he gave his acceptance speech, a very eloquently put ‘fuck you’ to those that didn’t believe in him, his vines wrapped around her waist, crushing her chest into his as he said that he never could have done any of it without her.

Flustered by the shock of finding herself so suddenly close to him and embarrassed by the number of people who saw it happen, she considered blasting him as far away from her as possible. And then she just… didn’t. Maybe it had been the way he’d tentatively smiled at her, though she thought maybe she’d smiled first. Maybe it had been how warm he was or how well they fit together.

In the week that passed since all of that happened, Shego, who never really thought about Drakken much, couldn’t get him out of her mind.

She knew every single one of his flaws.

His sweet tooth rivaled that of a toddler, and she often found candy wrappers lingering in the lab, or squished between the couch cushions. If he was upset she was bound to find him baking some sort of sweet-treat that he would gorge himself on if she didn’t stop him.

He fidgeted constantly, whether that meant shifting in place or messing with things he shouldn’t. Once he blew up the TV she had just stolen because he wouldn’t quit fiddling with a malfunctioning ray gun, even after she told him to put it away.

He scared easily, hiding under blankets when they watched horror movies and gluing himself to her side when the power went out and the only light in the lair came from her plasma powers.

He tapped his fingers, he hated her music, he was quick to anger, and way too quick to forgive. He obsessed over ideas, even when he knew they would go nowhere. His sleep schedule was nearly nonexistent, he didn’t care about taking tropical vacations, he always cared too much about what she thought of him - except the times when he didn’t care about her at all. He probably wanted kids. He was obsessed with karaoke, all his favorite movies were meant for children, and…

Shego’s mind froze, mid-thought

What was Drakken’s favorite movie? She knew he loved that dumb snowman movie, because he made her watch it every Christmas, but thinking back on all of their past movie nights she couldn’t remember one that he’d actually chosen the movie for.

He hated horror movies, she knew that, and yet nearly every movie she could recall watching with him was a horror movie. There’d been Bloodbath - a movie about a serial killer whose litany of victims were tortured and killed in brutal and unique ways, and Halley’s Comment - a more humorous horror film about a girl so distracted by her personal life that she was oblivious to the world being destroyed by a comet outside her window. It was funny, but the background horror had even had her on edge. Granted, she believed her anxieties surrounding comets were fairly justifiable, all things considered.

There’d also been The Glistening, Juvenile’s Game, That, and Yell. All of them had been her choices, and he’d spent almost all of them clutching his knees to his chest and watching from between the gaps in his fingers.

Shego rubbed her temples. She had to know what his favorite movie was. Why didn’t she know? She had to. They had a movie night at least once a week, if not more! How could she not know?

She leapt off the couch, and threw open the doors to the tv stand, scanning through their movie collection. She recognized a few musicals that belonged to him, some old cartoons, comedies, and a number of science-fiction and fantasy movies. He’d asked her to watch some of them with him: The Warlock of Zo, King of the Necklaces, Galaxy Fights… She couldn’t remember ever actually agreeing. Was his favorite The Tiger Ruler? Triassic Grounds? She should know the answer to this.

“Are you going to watch a movie?”

Shego glanced behind her to see Drakken standing in the doorway. It always threw her off to see him in clothing that differed from his usual lab coat. Seeing him now in black jeans and a light blue T-shirt made her blink.

“I don’t know. I guess so,” she lied. She wasn’t about to tell him that she’d only been looking through the movies because she’d been thinking about him.

He tucked his thumb into his pocket. “Can I join you? I’ll make popcorn.”

Why didn’t he bother to ask what movie she was going to watch? If he actually hated her choices shouldn’t he try avoiding movie nights? What was his deal? And - gah! - why couldn’t she stop thinking about him?

“Yeah, sure,” she agreed, then added, “Make two bags!”

He returned a few minutes later carrying a giant bowl filled to the brim with popcorn, the buttery scent infiltrating the air.

“What are you watching?” he asked, and she heard the bowl clink gently onto the table. A stray piece of popcorn bounced down next to her.

He always made the snacks for the movies, she realized. She could heat up a bag of popcorn too, but he always did it anyway. And a lot of the time he didn’t just make popcorn, but rather he’d set up an entire array of snacks and candies as if they were actually at a movie theater. Once, memorably, he set up a chocolate fountain that he’d found abandoned in his mother’s attic.

She rarely let him pick the movie, but he made the snacks anyway. Could she say she would do the same?

“Um... I don’t know,” she answered. “Why don’t you choose?” She pushed herself up and turned around to see him staring at her, obviously baffled by the unusual offer.

“Really?” he asked after a pause that bordered on awkward. “Is this some sort of trick? You’ve replaced my movies with horror movies, haven’t you?” he accused, rushing past her towards the TV stand.

He pulled a VHS out, seemingly at random, and opened it, sighing in relief when he saw she hadn’t messed with his movies.

She snorted and gave his shoulder a gentle shove. “Wow, tell me what you really think of me, Doc.”

“Well, it’s not as if you’ve ever liked watching my movies, Shego. What was I meant to expect? That you suddenly wanted to watch something I’d actually enjoy instead of something gruesome and horrible?” The way he spoke didn’t seem at all cruel, or even particularly upset about her history of movie decisions. Instead, he spoke like he would be shrugging if only he weren’t busy hunching over to choose a movie. It still made her feel guilty somehow, which was not an emotion she was - or planned to become - accustomed to.

“Just pick a movie,” she muttered, rolling her eyes. As she moved to sit on the couch, she could hear him whispering titles to himself.

He finally made a choice and hesitated for a brief moment before popping it in the VCR without telling her what he’d chosen.

As she watched the actors dancing and heard bits and pieces of songs that were bound to play throughout the movie, she figured out that he’d put on Fancy-Free even before the title scrawled across the scene in bright purple letters.

She suppressed a groan, knowing that she really had nothing to be annoyed about. She’d never actually seen it… Maybe he was right and she would like it. Although, a bunch of snot-nosed teenagers getting into trouble for liking music seemed ridiculous to her.

“You said I could choose,” Drakken reminded her, a pleading note in his voice before she had the chance to say anything herself.

She forced herself to shrug. “Do you see me changing it?”

He grinned at her and practically bounced into his usual seat next to her. She had a flash of desire that distracted her for the first ten minutes of the movie. Since when did she want Drakken to sit… closer? There was barely more than a few inches of space between them already. Since when did she want him to close that distance?

She had to force her brain to shut off, so she could at least watch the movie, if not actually enjoy it.

She discovered fairly quickly that Drakken had been right. She loved the movie. Snot-nosed teenagers or not, the movie was fun. By the end she found herself mouthing along as the titular song played the movie off.

“What?” she asked when she caught him staring at her an absent sort of smile on his face. It melted into a full-on smirk when she addressed him.

“I’ve been trying to get you to watch this movie for three years,” he said. “You always said you wouldn’t like it.”

“Yeah. Well, I–” She almost told him she didn’t, because she knew that he’d roll his eyes but otherwise leave well enough alone. “Shut up,” she said instead, half a giggle escaping her before she managed to choke it down. “It was… fun, but I still don’t get why you love it so much.”

“I saw it when it first came out when I was in college,” he began, leaning back against the couch. Again, Shego wanted to move closer to him. “I didn’t really care about it at first, but it became my favorite movie after the first time I went to karaoke night. Fancy-Free was the first song I ever performed since all the other songs on the list had already been sung at least twice. I got a standing ovation, you know.”

She liked seeing him talk about good memories. He so rarely did. Most of what she knew about his childhood were things that had gone wrong. The bully down the street that she never actually listened to stories about long enough to find out what he’d done, his father’s disappearance when he was nine that she never asked for details on, failed experiments, and failed attempts at making friends. She’d heard about it all, not that she listened to him.

“Are we friends?” she blurted suddenly before she even realized that she’d thought the words.

He froze mid-sentence. “Wha– What?”

“I… I don’t know.” She shook her head, already wishing she hadn’t spoken at all. What the hell did she think she was doing?

“No, wait, Shego! What do you mean?”

“I mean, we don’t like any of the same things! I hate karaoke, you love it. I love horror movies, you get all freaked every time we watch one. I want to go to the Bahamas or Hawaii for vacation, and your idea of a good time is baking cookies or building a robot. You’re a scientist and I–”

Shego stopped herself before she could say that she was stupid. She knew she wasn’t, she’d graduated college after all, but she still sometimes felt intimidated by how smart he actually was. She didn’t bother learning how most of his inventions worked, because he seemed to always be moving onto something new before she’d wrapped her head around the last project. He had trouble with words sometimes, but she’d figured out after less than a week of working with him that it was a matter of his brain moving faster than even he could keep up with, rather than actual stupidity.

After her rant, she expected… something from him. Anything. A rant of his own, a shocked reaction, just something. What she got instead was a strange look and a simple, “So?”

“What do you mean, ‘so?’” Shego found herself getting angry quite suddenly.

He shrugged. “I mean, ‘so.’ I know you don’t like karaoke, but you always come with me. Sometimes you even sing.”

“Don’t remind me.”

“And no, I don’t like watching horror movies but… well.” Drakken started to look flustered, nervous even. Like her, he was never great with emotions. He tapped the remote against his knee, before dropping it to the couch, and began lacing his fingers instead. “You do, so I watch them with you because… I guess because we are friends - aren’t we?”

“Yeah,” she sighed, hoping he couldn’t tell how much it relieved her to hear him say that. “Yeah, I guess we are.” What kind of a shitty friend was she though?

“Shego?”

“Yeah?”

“We both like the movie.” He gestured towards the screen as the credits cut to static and white noise. For a moment she stared at him, then she snickered, and then she began to laugh. Soon enough they were both cackling, blissfully leaving behind the feeling of dread the conversation had caused to coil up in her chest.

“If you ever tell anyone that I watched - let alone enjoyed - this movie I’ll set your teddy bear on fire.”

#drakgo #drakken #shego #fanfiction #drakgo fanfiction #shego x drakken #drakken x shego #gofordrakgo #oneshot #Friends #9 pages #2587 words

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bosnoek · 4 years ago

Text

The Anthology Task

For my anthology I picked the theme power and corruption because I prefer reading about stronger themes that have a real impact on me and thought I could find some interesting works about this theme. I thought of the theme after reading 1984.

The Hunger Games:

o Personal response to each text, showing how it broadened your horizons

Before reading this book, I could only imagine how people in these types of situations felt. I could try to put myself in their shoes, but that wouldn’t be the same. This book puts you in the shoes of someone who is in the middle of a political movement and because of this emersion I now know how people in real life situations that are similar to this, people trapped in a country with a corrupt government that has all the power, might feel. Because of this emersion I was able to relate to the book better and put myself in the character’s shoes. And I was able to relate to real life people that I have met better. Because I have a couple friends who unfortunately had to run away from their home country because it wasn’t safe there. It also gave good examples of how when people are put in a life-or-death situation, they either choose to sacrifice themselves for the community or they choose to save themselves and abandon the community. It was very interesting to see some of the character’s thought processes and how they tried to justify their actions.

o Explanation of how the texts link

In the hunger games they live in a corrupted society where all the power lies with a small group of people. In the book people try to rise up against this corrupt government. It showcases how people try to form a community powerful enough to go against this corrupted government, and it shows that strength lies in numbers.

o Explanation of how you researched the theme + found and selected the texts

When I was researching the theme, I came upon a lot of books that could fit the theme. One of the books was the hunger games. I had seen the movies before, but never read the book so, I decided to read it and I’m really glad I did.

V For Vendetta:

o Personal response to each text, showing how it broadened your horizons

It showcased how one individual can start a rebellion and bring a whole group of people together. It showcases that change isn’t made by only one person, but that one person can be the trigger to bring everyone together. It showed me the importance of a community and how it can make us feel safe and heard. You can see this in the movie in the form of everybody wearing the V mask. It showed that everybody wearing the mask was part of the same community and everybody wearing the mask felt safe enough to voice their dissatisfaction with the corrupt government. It showed me how much strength there lies in community.

o Explanation of how the texts link

The movie shows a rebellion fighting against the corrupt government of England in the late 2020’s. This rebellion comes together through a masked man who becomes their leader. They use the power of the corrupted government against it. The movie never really explains how the government ended up that way and what corrupted it, it only shows that the people in control are very power hungry and want to eliminate anyone who’s against them. This movie shows how the power that a corrupted government has can be used against it.

o Explanation of how you researched the theme + found and selected the texts

I had seen the film before and really liked it, but felt like in didn’t clearly see the themes the first time around. So, I thought this gave me the perfect opportunity to watch the film again and understand it better.

Sonnet 94:

o Personal response to each text, showing how it broadened your horizons

It made me understand how people that live their life for god feel. They feel that every day they have to live their best life to stay in god’s good graces, and this is something that I’m personally unfamiliar with. I’m an atheist and I don’t live my life for other people, every decision that I have ever made was for myself. So, reading about how people want to live according to god’s rules to receive this power was interesting to me.

o Explanation of how the texts link

The poem describes how when people are in god’s good graces, they will receive power and will reign over the earth while others will not. The poem also explains how it is bad to use ones beauty for their own desires. The theme of receiving power from god and reigning over earth links back to my theme of power and corruption because, all this power that you receive from god will obviously make you powerful, but it can also corrupt you. You can start to feel like you are above the rest because you are in god’s good graces. You might start using these powers for things that god would not approve of and you would be no better than the people that weren’t in god’s good graces to begin with. That’s why the poem also includes the warning that you shouldn’t use your beauty for your own desires. Because your beauty is a gift that god gave you because you are in his good graces and you shouldn’t use that gift against him.

o Explanation of how you researched the theme + found and selected the texts

When I was researching classic pieces of literature that talk about my theme, I came across an article that mentioned this poem. I had never read this particular poem from Shakespeare before, so I looked it up and thought that it was actually very interesting. This poem has a completely different look on life than me so I thought it was good to select a text that was the opposite of me so that I could learn something from it.

Meant To Be Yours From Heathers The Musical:

o Personal response to each text, showing how it broadened your horizons

I have personally never been in a controlling relationship before, so I have no experience with feeling like someone is trying to own you. But this song showcases exactly that feeling. It shows how someone can just spiral into insanity and push all the blame of what is wrong with themselves and their relationship onto other people. He threatened to take the outside forces away so that they could be together. It just made me think about how alone and scared the girl in the relationship might feel. Because he had everybody in her life fooled that he was such a good guy. She didn’t know what to do or where to go, she felt completely alone. And she also felt responsible for the way he turned out. All the what ifs are going through her head. What if you hadn’t listened to your dad? What if I had supported you better? What if I had been stronger? What would have happened if we had never met? I hope that no one ever has to go through a relationship like this but, I do think that listening to songs like this is a good way to temporarily know what it feels like to be someone who has gone through this.

o Explanation of how the texts link

It shows how one person in a relationship can go from loving you to getting corrupted by outside forces, in this case his dad, and turning that love into an obsession and wanting to have power over you. When his girlfriend realised what was happening, she wanted to end the relationship, but instead of realising that he is responsible for this he blames outside forces like her friends and their school. The song showcases him slowly losing his sense of self and only finding peace in his girlfriend, but when she doesn’t want him anymore, he loses it and decides to blow up the school. It shows how someone can be too corrupted and power hungry to be saved.

o Explanation of how you researched the theme + found and selected the texts

I have watched Heathers the musical many times and this song was always one that struck out to me. So, when I picked this topic, I immediately thought of this song, I just knew I had to use it.

Animal Farm:

o Personal response to each text, showing how it broadened your horizons

Animal farm shows the process of an oppressed group standing up to their oppressor and taking over. But you start the notice that the oppressed group starts to turn into their oppressor and at the end of the book the other animals don’t see the difference between their old oppressor the humans and their new oppressor the pigs. I liked how it showed the process of the pigs gaining more and more power and even though they were doing bad things they kept the rest of the animal under control through manipulation. It was interesting to see how people are obviously being manipulated, but they don’t see it themselves.

o Explanation of how the texts link

In the story Orwell explores themes like tyranny, religion, allegiance, power hungriness, corruption, and the role of the population in all of this. It talks about a group taking the power away from their corrupted leader and taking the power for them self. This power will eventually corrupt their new leader and start the cycle all over again. It’s satirical and it’s supposed to show how politicians manipulate people for power. I think it showcases this very well.

o Explanation of how you researched the theme + found and selected the texts

Animal farm is pretty famous, but I have never read it before. When I picked this theme, I picked it to fit around animal farm because I really wanted to read it. I’m glad I did because I enjoyed it and I think it’s the kind of book everybody should read at least once in their life.

Macbeth:

o Personal response to each text, showing how it broadened your horizons

It showcased how easily some people are manipulated. Macbeth was very easily manipulated by Lady Macbeth. She used his desire to be powerful for this. Macbeth was so easily manipulated that he took it as far as to believe anything somebody told him and being willing to do anything to gain the power he desired. To me this was very interesting because I’m a pretty stubborn person and I’m not easily influenced so, seeing someone just slowly losing their sense of self and start doing whatever other people tell him to do was quite different for me.

o Explanation of how the texts link

It shows how Macbeth and Lady Macbeth are so power hungry that it eventually drives them insane. Especially Macbeth. After he killed Banco, I thought he could see his ghost and he started having a nervous breakdown and talking to his ghost. It shows this corruption slowly taking him over and making him more paranoid. And Lady Macbeth was just feeding into this paranoia. I think it’s a very interesting depiction of how someone very power hungry, can eventually just lose all their power because of decisions they made along the way to get their power.

o Explanation of how you researched the theme + found and selected the texts

I was talking to a friend of mine about the cult anthology task and about the theme I picked, and they recommended Macbeth to me. I had seen it once before about 5 years ago and I remember liking it so I thought it would be a good pick.

Portrait Of Henry The 8th:

o Personal response to each text, showing how it broadened your horizons

Researching Henry, the 8th made me realise how hard woman had it in that time. They had to do whatever men told them to do and they had to live up to insanely high expectations. It made me appreciate this time period more because of course it’s not perfect now either, but it’s a lot better than it used to be. We’re at least going in the right direction.

o Explanation of how the texts link

Henry the 8th was king of England from 1509 to 1547. He was a very powerful man and often used his power for his own gains. He is most well known for having had six wives over his lifetime and for divorcing his first wife Catherine of Aragon. The pope disagreed with Henry about the annulment of his marriage, and this caused England to split from the church. Henry liked to be in control of his wives and if they disobeyed him or did not live up to his expectations, he divorced or beheaded them. He was a very jealous man and all this power that he had corrupted him and made him feel like he had the right to own any woman he wanted to own. This is especially prevalent his fifth and sixth marriage. In his fifth marriage he married Catherine Howard who, at the time was 17 while Henry was 49. Catherine only married Henry because she was afraid of being beheaded like her cousin Anne Bolin who was Henry’s second wife. In the end he still beheaded Catherine out of jealousy. His sixth wife Catherine Parr was supposed to marry another man whom she loved, but henry stole her away. Like Catherine Howard, Catherine Parr was too scared to say no. His power corrupted his mind and made him feel like he was all powerful and untouchable. I think you can see this in his pose as well. In the portrait he’s in a wide and confident stance with a smug look on his face. He looks like a man that has gone mad with power.

o Explanation of how you researched the theme + found and selected the texts

I have always found Henry the 8th his six wives very interesting. So, when I picked this theme, I immediately thought of him. At a certain point I had something picked at for almost all of my categories except for the art ones. So, I thought it would be a good idea to pick the most famous portrait of Henry the 8th and talk about that.

Corruption A Very Short Introduction By Leslie Holmes:

o Personal response to each text, showing how it broadened your horizons

It was really interesting to see someone so knowledgeable on the subject talk about the subject they are passionate about. It also taught me a lot about how deep rooted some corruption is even in some areas that didn’t even cross my mind like when it comes to government regulation and economic competitiveness. It showed me the tactics that people in power use to keep their power and corrupt all different sides of society. It also showed me how intense it is, and it made me a lot more aware about that this is also going on in my life and it showed me how I can spot this corruption and what I can do about it.

o Explanation of how the texts link

This book starts off by giving you a definition of corruption and then it goes on to giving you a lot of different examples of corruption that has happened all over the world and corruption that is deeply rooted into society. It talks about government regulation, economic competitiveness, the rule of law, state’s fragility, democracy and how all of these things are affected by the people in power who corrupt it. The book also gives examples of how people go against this corruption. So, in conclusion this book links to my topic because it discusses events that happened in history and that are still going on that have to do with people in power corrupting all sides of society like the law, the economy and democracy.

o Explanation of how you researched the theme + found and selected the texts

For a non-fiction book I wanted something that discussed how corruption effects my life. I want something that I could learn from and actually felt like I gained something after reading it. I was searching on scholar google for books when I came across this one and became intrigued. The writer of this book has studied this subject for several decades and is even funded by the Australian government to research it more because corruption is such a big problem in the 21st century. I thought this was a book that could actually teach me something, but not make it to complex so that that way I would actually understand it and would feel like I gained some important knowledge. So, I picked it.

The Power Of Optimism By Mohini Puranik:

o Personal response to each text, showing how it broadened your horizons

This text showed me how powerful positivity and optimism can be. When times are hard, it’s really easy to just wallow in your own feelings and not fight back against these corrupted negative feelings. But this poem showed me how powerful it can be to try and be positive even in hard times and how this mindset can really positively affect your life. I thought I was a really good reality check for me because it forced me to think about how I deal with negativity and about if the way I deal with negativity is helpful or not. It showed me that to be happy and positive you have to be persistent and strong, and that this optimistic mindset takes a lot of power but that this struggle is worth the end result.

o Explanation of how the texts link

The poem shows how powerful negative thoughts and optimism can be. It shows how when negative thoughts try to corrupt you, you can fight back with optimism. It shows that no matter how strong these thoughts may be you can always fight back against this corruption.

o Explanation of how you researched the theme + found and selected the texts

I had already selected a lot of texts talking about people being corrupted by power and talking about very negative things happening to people, so I wanted a text that talked about people fighting against this corruption and using their own power, strength, and optimism to not get corrupted themselves. I also wanted more poems in my anthology, so I started searching for poems about this and I came upon this one. I thought it was simple enough that the students at my TP school could also understand it. So, I choose it as my TP work.

Power, Corruption And Lies Painting:

o Personal response to each text, showing how it broadened your horizons

The painting made me think about how capitalism has been corrupted over the years and how this corruption has just intertwined itself within the system. It has gone so far that to get rid of this corruption you have to get rid of capitalism itself because these two things can’t be separated anymore. But we’re stuck in a consumer cycle where we keep buying things and fuelling capitalism so we can’t escape. I have never really thought about this before because capitalism is just something that such an important part of our society even if we don’t want it to be. So, it was good for me to learn more about capitalism and about this cycle that we’re stuck in.

o Explanation of how the texts link

The paintings show how the pig (who represents capitalism) fades over time. I think that the paintings depict the artist hope that the power that the corrupted capitalist mindset has on people and capitalism itself will fade over time. The pig is depicted with a knife which represents that the pig in itself isn’t bad, but that the knife which symbolises corruption is bad. But the artist made the conscious decision to not only have the pig fade, but the knife as well showcasing that the two are linked and can’t be separated. So, this means that they think the corruption can’t go away on its own, the whole concept of capitalism has to be thrown out with it. The artist is very obviously against capitalism.

o Explanation of how you researched the theme + found and selected the texts

I was searching for paintings relating to my theme and I came upon this artist, which had an exhibit with the same name as my theme. I started searching through his exhibit for a painting that would spark my interest. I came upon a collection of painting depicting the same picture of a pig with a knife, but in each new painting the pig and the knife were more faded and distorted. I researched what the artist meant with this piece and I found it very interesting. It was about capitalism, which is something I don’t often think about actually, because it’s so prevalent in my life that I just don’t stand still to think about it ever. I think the more prevalent something is, the more you choose to ignore it. So, I decided to pick this painting and stop ignoring the subject.

This was my anthology. I hope you enjoyed!

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marinetteplztakeabreak · 5 years ago

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The year is 2021. The first few episodes of mlb Season 5 were just aired. Tumblr’s exploding with fanfics and theories. The show’s new director is conducting cryptic polls about which friendships and teamups the fans want to see most. Adrien is finally realizing that his dad sucks and has gotten more direct in his small moments of rebellion. Kagami, Adrien, and Marinette have a group chat that’s 90% just elaborate plans for sneaking out. Marinette’s been getting better and better at acting normal around Adrien since the beginning of season four and she’s realized that regardless of romantic feelings, she desperately wants to be his friend.

Everyone’s posting about the latest episode, Lady WiFi 3.0, where Alya got akumatized because she was jealous that Adrien was stealing her best friend. Marinette was so busy panicking and blaming herself that she forgot to slip away and transform, which lead to half the episode being Marichat. Chat Noir had a few lines that may have implied he know that she was Ladybug and every word of their dialogue is now being picked apart by theorists. After they won the battle, there were copious amounts of communication and apologies from Adrien, who was immediately yelled at by both girls because “Adrien stop apologizing for hanging out with your friends you’re allowed to do that, you self-deprecating idiot.” The episode ended with Adrien becoming Alya’s secret behind the scenes co-runner of the Ladyblog, and he’s thriving at the chance to work without being directly watched by the public and she’s thriving at the fact that she has a dedicated co-worker who’s just as obsessed with superheroes (especially Ladybug) as she is.

Now that months have passed since the season 4 finale aired, people are finally calming down. Mayura got so close to winning that she managed to take Chat Noir’s miraculous, discovering his secret identity in the process. Chat Noir didn’t end up telling Ladybug about this: partly due to fear that he’d lose his Miraculous, because he’s gotten so good at being a team with Ladybug that he’s afraid Paris would be in danger without him. Also, now that Ladybug is the guardian, she’s the only one who could choose a new Chat Noir and therefore would know the secret identity of anyone she picked. Also, it’s never been directly confirmed, but everyone’s pretty sure that he knows that Marinette is Ladybug, and without his Miraculous, he would lose his only means of defense if Mayura did hunt him down in his civilian identity and grill him for Ladybug’s identity. He also seems to think that he’s the less important hero and it doesn’t matter as much if he gets hurt or captured so long as he manages to protect his Lady. His decision spawned endless discourse, but everyone can at least see where he’s coming from. The heroes are doing their best but there’s obvious moments where they’re cracking under the stress and could desperately use an adult on their team. #givemarinetteanap was trending on Tumblr for a few days. Adrien had canonically acknowledged depression and has actual medical reasons to force his dad to let him interact with friends at times, although his father still does the absolute bare minimum.

A week ago, in the season 5 pilot, Natalie faked a coughing fit to stop Hawkmoth when he was about to hurt Chat. She’s still trying to take the Miraculouses and still wants Hawkmoth to succeed but she’ll literally die before any harm comes to Adrien, and she’s the only one who knows he’s also Chat Noir. Adrien knows that Mayura knows his identity but he has no idea that Natalie knows, so he’s confused about why she suddenly seems to understand why he’s exhausted after midnight akuma battles and even clears his schedule, so he can rest. She still rarely shows direct affection, but the small things are becoming more and more frequent and groups of dedicated fans are eagerly awaiting her redemption arc.

The amateur fashion business that Marinette started halfway through season 4 is taking off, thanks in part to celebrity promotions, from Jagged Stone to Clara Nightingale to Adrien Agreste. She’s under a lot of pressure dealing with actual money and orders and the stress of running a real business, but she’s clearly happy with it, and it gives her something productive to do with the time that she used to spend obsessing over Adrien. She also taught herself how to crochet for a project and now brings string and a hook with her everywhere to stress-crochet when anxiety spirals hit. It’s become something of a joke within the fandom but no one can deny that it’s a strangely calming aesthetic. The shine for Adrien in her room has been taken down and replaced with a wall of the designs she’s the proudest of, which caused a barrage of conflicting emotions for everyone watching.

Chloe has become a permanent part of the friend group as well, after she exposed Lila’s lies. She’s still has no filter and causes a few akumas when she hurts others’ feelings, but she’s genuinely trying to be a decent person, so she can make real friends. She also manages to pull Marinette out of an anxiety attack a few times by being ridiculously blunt and startling Marinette out of her train of thought.

The show openly calls Juleka and Rose a couple, they’re had a few on screen kisses and people make YouTube compilations of them saying the phrase “my girlfriend.” Half the class comes to them for relationship advice because they’re literally the steadiest and healthiest couple in the class. Also, it’s revealed that Chloe never had a crush on Adrien. She was literally just fighting Marinette for his platonic attention the entire time, which she thought was common knowledge. “Ew, why would I want to date Adrien, we’ve known each other since we were toddlers?” Someone asks Chloe if there’s anyone she does have a crush on and she says not really, no one in their class is even that cute, Ladybug’s low-key gorgeous though in a celebrity crush kind of way. Marinette is the only person in the class who’s actually surprised to find out that Chloe might have a crush on Ladybug.

Teamups with the Miraculous holders are becoming more and more common. Queen Bee has openly said that she doesn’t care about the danger of her identity being revealed and has become a frequent member of the lineup. Alix, juleka, Rose, and Nathaniel have each been given Miraculouses a few times, as well as several newly introduced characters. In an episode we only have a trailer for so far, Marinette is having such a bad panic attack that she knows she won’t be able to be Ladybug, so she discretely slips her earrings into Alya’s bag and Alya has to save the day as Ladybird. During a different high-stakes akuma battle near the end of season 4, Hawkmoth knew that he’d be causing a lot of collateral damage so he locked Adrien inside with heavy supervision to keep him safe. Unable to sneak away, he managed to slip his ring with a note into Chloe’s bag, because she was over for a business meeting and also the only person he knew that Ladybug would trust with a Miraculous. Chloe got to be Reine Chat for the day and she was surprisingly mature about it, listening to everything Ladybug told her and putting the Miraculous back where she got it after the battle was won She’d never admit it, but it was clear that she was genuinely scared for one of the first times in her life.

Now, the fans theories for what’s going to happen continue to pour in. The episode titles for the entire season were just uncovered. The finale is going to be Princess Justice parts 1, 2, and 3. The current predominant fan theory is that Sabine is going to have to be Ladybug for part of the episode and fight an akumatized Marinette. It’s been defended by so many long winding arguments that no one can remember if it’s a crack theory or genuine. The episode just before the finale is titled Emilie and it’s causing different kinds of massive panic throughout the fandom. The season trailers show tons of interactions between all sides of the love square. Adrien is going to break down in tears in Marinette’s arms at one point in the season. That trailer clip has also been overanalyzed to death at this point. Adrien has learned to bake macarons at the bakery and Marinette has learned to win a staring contest with Gabriel Agreste. All is well.

#miraculous ladybug #miraculous lb #mlb #love square #chloe bourgous #nathalie sancoeur #adrien agreste #marinette dupain cheng #I don’t know if this counts as fanfic but I’ll tag it anyways #ml fanfiction #ml fanfic #alya cesaire #julerose #long post

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dakotacrisis · 5 years ago

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Labyrinth AU

I was watching Labyrinth earlier and this idea started to form. One thing led to another and quickly spiraled out of control until I had what is basically a plot synopsis typed up.

Basic premise is that Adrien wishes himself away to the Underground and now must a run a perilous labyrinth to save the princess trapped in the center before he turns into a goblin. Lots of obstacles, magic, animal sidekicks, and an overprotective king awaits.

(Side note if you have never watched Labyrinth you should! Pure 80s cheese with baby faced Jennifer Connelly and David-Flipping-Bowie!)

Adrien is stuck in his cold and lonely mansion spurned by his father once again for a shred of human interaction. One of his only solaces is the books and movies he obsesses over to free him of his mundane trappings for at least a short while. He pulls out one of his favorites, a short novel simply titled, The Labyrinth. It was an unorthodox fairy tale about a Goblin Queen who steals a young man’s younger sibling and forces him to run her treacherous labyrinth to win them back.

Looking at his bleak life he wishes for the Goblin Queen to steal him away to the Underground. To his surprise the goblins appear in his room and take him to the Underground. He blacks out for a moment and when he comes to he is no longer in his room but a circular throne room filled with dozens of goblins and an older woman sat on a throne. She introduces herself as the Queen of the goblins and ruler of the Underground. She is confused to see Adrien in place of the child she expected to appear.

Adrien explains who he is and why he wished himself here. Well, seeing as how he was too old to be kept she tries to send him back home but he stops her. He wants to stay. He’ll do anything! If he wants to stay that badly then he needs to prove his worth. Only then can he be turned Fae and be saved the agony of transforming into a goblin.

Yes! That! How does he do that? The Queen tells him that her daughter, Princess Marinette, has been recently taken to the center of the labyrinth and locked away in a tower by her father. Her father, the Goblin King, is not a bad man. He was stricken by a curse of selfishness that resulted in him locking up their daughter to keep her from harm and potential suitors. If Adrien can make it to the center of the labyrinth and free the princess then he will be allowed to stay. He must hurry though. For if he does not make it there within thirteen hours he will turn into a goblin himself.

The Queen cannot go to rescue the princess since the King can sense the presence of Fae blood. A human should be able to pass undetected though. She hands him a ring with the power to call upon help at any time. It can only be used once though so he must only use it when he is in dire peril. With his mission set Adrien heads into the labyrinth.

Things aren’t going well at first until he meets a resident within the labyrinth. A small turtle stuck on his back that Adrien helps to right. The turtle thanks him and offers to guide him as far as he can to the center of the labyrinth. Adrien picks up the turtle and takes the directions he’s given. They end up at a pair of doors with a pair of foxes guarding each one. To pass Adrien must choose a door but only one will lead closer to the center of the labyrinth while the other leads to certain death. One of the foxes only tells the truth and one only lies, explains the turtle. They will answer but one question so Adrien needs to use that one question to figure out which door is safe. He gets it right and the fox guardian joins them on their quest.

They continue walking when they run into the Goblin King. He knows what they are doing and warns them that they will surely fail. No one will reach his daughter! No one will harm her! No one will take her!

Adrien tries to reason with him but he is hearing none of it and opens the floor below them so they fall into an oubliette. They try and fail to find an exit. All seems lost until Adrien remembers the magic ring and uses it to call for help. A black cat appears on the shadows of the wall that Adrien asks for help. The cat nods and leaps to one of the walls. The wall comes crumbling down revealing a passage out. The trio leaves the oubliette and continues their journey.

They make it back to the surface and into a dense forest. Now unbearably hungry having skipped dinner that night Adrien looks for some berries to curb his hunger pains. The fox and turtle unaware that Adrien isn’t following go on ahead leaving him alone. A snake slithers down from one of the trees claiming to be a friend of the trapped princess. She has a message for him that can only be accessed by eating this peach from the tree. Skeptical but hungry and naïve Adrien takes a bite of the peach and is dropped into deep sleep.

In his slumber the darkness gives way to a grand ballroom. In the center stands what looks like a giant snow globe and a beautiful young girl posed inside. The princess no doubt. She looks just like her parents. He approaches the bubble she’s trapped in. She smiles at him pleased to see he received her message. She warns him that even if he gets to the tower she is trapped in he will have to break the curse surrounding her father in order to free her. The curse manifested itself in a rose that her father keeps on him at all times. If he can destroy the rose then the curse will be broken. He has to hurry though, his time is running out.

He presses a hand to glass and laments that he knows what it is like to be trapped away from everything. He won’t let her suffer like this. He’ll break the curse and save her family. He promises. She rests her hand where his is and thanks him. He has her total faith in him. The bubble pops and the dream dissolves.

Adrien wakes up in a different part of the jungle. His companions now long gone he forges ahead alone and hits another snag when he meets a knight in red armor blocking his path. If he wants to move forward he must defeat her first! She hands him a sword and the pair duel with Adrien just barely edging out a win. The knight lets him pass and impressed by his skills tags along in his journey to rescue the princess.

They meet back up with the turtle and fox. With time rapidly running out they finally make it to the center of the labyrinth. The Goblin King stands guard in front of the tower. Adrien and his newly acquired friends launch into battle. Adrien gets hit with a spell that seems to transport him back to his room in the human realm. He at first thinks it was all a strange dream but when he tries to leave his room he walks back into it. Bars on the window block his escape outside. A voice taunts him from the shadows saying that he will never leave. Frustrated he grabs the desk chair and throws it at the barred windows. They crash open and Adrien is back in the labyrinth. His friends are beaten and tired from fighting. Time is almost up. Something has to be done soon or else Adrien will turn into a goblin.

Adrien stands and faces the King. Insert heartwarming speech about how the King trapping someone he cares about in order to shield them from the world is hurting them more than helping them. Pain happens. People you love get hurt. It sucks but it also means that you are alive. The pain means that you loved something. Loved it with all your heart. What was he condemning his daughter to if he kept her in her tower? A life of loneliness away from anyone or anything that could make her happy? Adrien knows that pain. Knows it all too well. It is what brought him to the Underground. Did he want that for his daughter?

The King is able to snap out of his curse long enough to take the rose strapped to his belt and crush it in his hands. With the curse now gone the king quickly takes the transforming Adrien and urges him to drink a potion that will turn him into a Fae instead if that is what he chooses. He drinks it without a second thought and the goblin appearance he started to take on melts away.

The princess rushes out of the tower and embraces her father. Glad that he is safe once more. The King apologizes for trapping her and letting himself come under the curse in the first place. She forgives him and turns to Adrien and thanks him for helping her family. She knew she could count on him.

Everyone returns to the castle where the Queen is reunited with her family. The Queen begins preparations at once for a ball to celebrate the Princess and King’s safe return. At the ball the King and Queen also welcome Adrien into their family. The story ends with Adrien shyly asking the princess for a dance which she happily agrees.

#miraculous ladybug #labyrinth au #adrien agreste #marinette dupain cheng #adrinette #my dumb au ideas will never cease!

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the-soldicr · 5 years ago

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@slowcode sent:

(ง'̀-‘́)ง Hey, calm down, let's get out of here.

SEND (ง'̀-‘́)ง TO CATCH JAMES GETTING INTO BAR FIGHTS || STILL O P E N

{ ooc // WELP, this practically became a short story. I did not expect this meme to awaken the slumbering muse but I had been working on this reply for days at a time with no control over James and how much was written which has caused other replies to be able to roll out! I REALLY wish I had a set length of material to send out but GODS do the Hauleys have minds of their own when it comes to how loud they are and how vocal they become. I’m only partially sorry - this post actually gave me a lot of feelings and insight on James. Hope it’s okay! It’s cut for length because wow did I really run with it. }

Through the warmth of the Jack and Coke he was drowning in, limbs heavy and vision blurred, the young soldier GRINNED drunkenly at his companion in the dimly lit bar, tapping his fourth drink against the other’s.

S o m e d a y s it was easier than others, making flirtatious passes at certain handsome medical professionals over drinks. His breath fogged the glass he was smirking into, looking up through dark lashes with big brown eyes. James was flushed, s l u r r i n g , laughing genuinely at Dan’s antics for what felt like the first time in God knows how long.

And S O M E d a y s ... ? Well, SOME DAYS w e r e n ' t so good.

The mere BOY had found himself beginning to spiral after it all, so LOST, staring to break more and more of his own rigid set of personal rules on morality he used to hold. The near-constant haze of being shitfaced whenever possible took him as far away from the HORRIBLE memories that chased him as it could, but it never worked. He HATED feeling out-of-control, but it was the only way he managed to relax these days. Therapy didn’t seem to be helping...

James carried the weight of the world on his tense shoulders, trying his damnedest to hold his head high. He was just a FUCKING K I D , being asked to do the unthinkable, asked to B E so much for everyone else.

For him to truly let go, just for a MOMENT after his second tour, after everything that had happened, was a b e a u t i f u l l y rare and momentous occasion.

With his best friend of a little sibling an adult now, more than capable of handling themselves for a few nights alone without his direction ( though the idea still made him uneasy ), and with his vigilante father being radio silent for the last few days, no text messages from new burners or cryptic payphone calls telling James what to do or where to go, or what lies to tell, his time was finally his own, even if j u s t for the night.

The service dog at his feet sighed, nestling his head against James’ knee, focused intently on his wasted handler.

James smirks again at Mr. Cain, wrapping his lips around his glass and feeling all kinds of warm & loose as they chattered on, making humorous small talk.

Life had constantly been wearing the soldier down, the fighter holding the torch to the darkness. It's easy to see in his eyes, the way he holds himself with the world constantly at his back. His father's new " career ” had meant there were no rules now left to govern them, his demands for James made with no regard for legality anymore. The WARS the man had served in had also meant blurred lines of their own, fellow soldiers’ breaking of rules buried so far beneath their feet as they waded through the bodies, lost to the brutality of it all. It seemed it didn't matter to a n y o n e what LAWS SAID anymore, PARTICULARLY not for the Hauley family, broken and dysfunctional for no good reason other than the poor choices they had all made.

The things he did over there... Things he'd never let happen in a million years he watched take place with his own two eyes, his silence deafening; heartbreaking words he'd never DARE to say began to leave his lips. The things he would NEVER DO became mere muscle memory, bitter and cold laughter beginning to bubble in the back of his throat.

It’s hard to keep your head out there. War has a way of changing you, and not ONCE for the better. You could go in with the most pure and noble of intentions, and it mattered none to the mortars, to the insurgents and their guns.

It was ALWAYS UGLY.

( And that face in the mirror was looking less and less like his with every passing day... )

As the night rolls on, there’s an overly drunk man behind them that causes James to sigh and shake his head on occasion, belligerent and loud about his passing opinions on just about EVERY topic. Lips purse and shoulders start to hunch, doing his BEST to ignore it, picking absentmindedly at the label on the beer he asks for, but that indescribable anger that followed him was BUILDING AGAIN.

The thing is that James has had ENOUGH of people going on and on about things they would NEVER understand. His sisters had such complicated opinions on Thomas's actions that they’d never feel his pain on, and there were the political arguments on the wars he’d fought in from people who would never fight for another soldier in their lives, on folks regarding others with basic human decency, and on the treatment of their nation's veterans...

His fists are already balled, jaw already set hearing the man as he starts to blabber on about gun laws when he smacks into James’ back, gesturing widely. James dips his head, raises a hand with a stark expression, forgiving and dismissive

Thomas’s voice echos in his mind.

LUKE 23:34 --- And Jesus said, ‘Father, forgive them, for they know not what they do.’

But the man just guffaws, snorts drunkenly. “ EXCUSE M E , ” he barks. James frowns. He’s offended that James and his little ‘ friend ’ were just sitting there, not looking back at him, no apologies to be had. The man DESERVED that respect; at least in his drunken mind.

James nods again, sharply, ducking his head and hoping he’d just... go away. He doesn’t want a fight. The last thing he wants is a FIGHT. Kevlar, the service dog at James’ feet, lets out a small woof as his knee starts to bounce and his heart-rate spikes, anxiously running a hand over his scruff, growing more agitated by the minute. Lights flash in his eyes, fingers tap-tap-tapping on glass. He can tell the drunken James is getting upset.

Motioning at the fresh veteran tattoos on his arm ( in memoriam ), the asshole grinned maliciously.

“You know, you’re what’s wrong with our government these days. NO RESPECT FOR ANYONE ELSE. Don’t you have some... fascist boots to be out deepthroating, S I R ?

Some INNOCENT FOREIGNERS to kill?”

And G O D, there it is--- that D A R K N E S S that flashes up in the kid’s eyes, breathing growing more audible by the second. His bark is as sharp as his bite is, soft brown eyes eyes going dark and his face growing pale.

James laughs BITTERLY, his hands shaking as memories of dragging bits and pieces of his brothers’ remains off dusty dirt roads flashed before him, bloodied combats falling off and left behind. Deafening explosions echo in his ears as if he’d NEVER LEFT.

“ Shut... ” He BARKS, standing up quickly and pointing a finger in the man’s face, “You need to shut up. Just--- shut the fuck up,” James snarls, but it’s more out of desperation than anything, glaring down at the asshole with a pained expression, hit teeth grit.

" G O D --- All... all that BULLSHIT we have to deal with over there, and we--- we JUST--- we come home and get this shit thrown back at us by people like YOU.”

The drunk puffs up indignantly, and James’ can hear Dan’s gentle voice tell him that they need to leave--- that it’s okay, that he needs to calm down, that they can just g o , but the man opens his mouth again, and that’s all it takes.

The kid can barely hear the rest of his sharp and drunken slurred insults fall on his ears, feel his service dog pawing at him, his fist FLIES towards the other's nose, gripping his shirt to hold him still.

CRACK, CRACK, CRACK, CRA—

It WOULD have been a small bar fight, a brawl, a mere escalation of brushing shoulders and slurred words, but the c i v i l i a n doesn't stand a chance underneath the sharp and trained hits of THE SOLDIER. It’s the echo of Dan's voice that pulls him through the fog before he truly started to see RED. Dan, the medic. DAN, the innocent he brought there. D A N , the rational drunk at his side telling him he needs to go, that they need to leave before James does something even stupider than what's already been done. The sound of his firm voice pulls James out of his mind, out of his fogged up brain, and with bloodied knuckles he furrows his brows at the more sincere of the two, his chest HEAVING as he looked down at his moaning VICTIM hollering about suing him, about veterans being ticking time bombs, and he nodded numbly, following the doctor out hurriedly, rushing out the door as onlookers muttered to each other.

He pants, s t u m b l i n g through the street, adrenaline pumping through his chest and distant feet barely cooperating enough to guide himself out, hands raking obsessively over short hair.

The boy's eyes were W I D E , shining with adrenaline and emotion.

" Why did I do that? " He gasps out to Dan as if he held the answers, looking to his bloodied knuckles, to the bar and back to him with those huge and g l i s t e n i n g , frightful eyes. Any coldness from him is long-gone, replaced once again with that child-like gaze of a kid who just wanted to be the good-natured change in the world he ached for, before the military turned him into an unforgiving machine. " Why ... why the FUCK did I just DO THAT ? "

The thought makes him SICK, and he has to hold a balled up fist to his mouth to keep from coughing, gagging on the burn in the back of his throat, the taste of bitter alcohol on his tongue. He just punched a civilian. Repeatedly. He could EASILY get picked up and charged for assault and battery, dishonorably discharged. It's so unlike him, he's pale in the face, looking around as if the answers were there for him to find, his dog pushing against his legs and pawing at him.

" I didn't mean to do that I just— He was just— He was talking shit and I— I kept thinking about B E N, man, " He rambled, almost incoherently, t r e m b l i n g in his shoes.

" About his family, and— and his LITTLE GIRLS, and— I'm— I'm sorry. I'm SO sorry, Dan. I— I shouldn't have d r a g g e d you into my BULLSHIT, I just—! " James drags on, pacing with hands in his hair. " F U C K ! "

James bends over, g a s p i n g o u t with broken, raspy breaths. Things had been going just fine. He's a fucking mess and the last thing Daniel Cain needs is to be forced into his chaotic life on top of everything else. " I'm so, SO S O R R Y , I don't — "

He assaulted a man in front of a medical professional and left him there on AMERICAN SOIL. A CIVILIAN. In PUBLIC.

" What the FUCK is wrong with me? " James w e e p s quietly, w i p i n g his nose with a soft sniff, Kevlar jumping up to kiss his tears away.

( WHO EVEN W A S HE ANYMORE? )

meme answer for @slowcode

#asks.#( ok this was sitting for a long time but i worked on it for hours straight at one point )#( and this helped me get into james mind )#tw: war #tw: facism #( I love this so so so so much and THANK YOU FOR SENDING IT IN )#slowcode

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dammitadolfnomorecake · 5 years ago

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🏰🏰⚔️🐲👑 DMODT 83 full... ok, so I lied I need one last chapter after this one

Nuzzling into their blankets, Eren looked adorable. His hair a tangled mess that could wait for later, as he sought the warmth of the spot Levi had vacated. Leaning down, he kissed his mate on the forehead, not wanting to disturb his lover now that he was resting properly. Morning sickness had hit, kicking in hard as winter rolled round. Between fits of coughing and long hours next to the toilet, the omega had been wiped out. Viren's third tooth coming through, and an influx of storm damage related reports from Marley didn't help the situation, so Levi had taken to waking earlier than his husband in order to help out with his paperwork. One more damn month and they'd be free. One more month and they'd be moving out to the country, with Armin's blessing and help. Extra building materials for the orphanage had been ordered, then delivered at the site that would be their home once they left. Double checking Eren's shoulders were covered, Levi patted the bed to let Luca know it was safe to climb up, their dragon loved the small swell of Eren's stomach, but not so much the morning sickness that came with it. Each time Eren was ill, Luca would seek him out, taking his hand in his mouth to guide him to the omega. Luca would have gone through all of this the first time around with Viren, where Levi had missed it all and wasn't about to make the same mistake. Nor was he going to allow himself to forget anything. He'd known for months there were problems with his memory. He'd thought them small and isolated incidents, that he'd never forget something as important as Eren telling him he was pregnant again. His omega had been hurt deeply over his forgetting, even if he'd put on a brave face to deal with the rest of the party, then Luca's hyperactivity due to the amount of sugar he'd eaten. After the ball had come letter after letter addressed to Prince Armin, the beta exceptionally popular with all those he'd met at the ball, yet had no idea how to turn them all down. It seemed as if everyone wanted a piece of the "mysterious" young prince, despite the fact they were going to be severely disappointed when they realised that Armin's first true love would always be the books of the castle's library and display rooms. Only someone as obsessed with the written word would manage to worm their way into Armin's heart. Though he was the perfect target for a love induced kidnapping, his head so far off in the clouds Levi was surprised he didn't literally float. The again, he also did love a good rumour too. Armin wanted all the details of the wedding, then of Eren's pregnancy, whisper interrogating him at all the wrong times. More often than not, Mikasa would be right there, how she didn't know yet, he had no idea but each time it happened Levi wanted to leave the beta to struggle through everything on his own. All his thoughts had already been consumed by Eren and his boys, not that they weren't already, it was still such a shock that Eren was pregnant again, his mind was unable to move pass such huge news. He was excited for their coming family member and terrified for Eren when his melancholy was still such an issue for him. The few following nights after the ball had seen Eren tossing and turning with nightmares, visions of Levi dying in his arms instead of Zeke, or visions of being held captive again while pregnant, forced to give birth all alone. He wasn't going to go through this alone, Levi had started a journal to make sure he knew what was going on at all times. Every important thing that happened was written down, as well as the date and time if he remembered, if not it was just "morning" or "evening". He wasn't going to burden Eren any more than he had to. The brunette was carrying far too much on his shoulders as was. Organising Eren's papers on the dining table, Levi cracked his knuckles before picking up his quill. The mail from Europe always and first. Eren might say otherwise, yet he knew for a fact the omega migrated back to whatever they sent when sorting his morning mail. Plus, it made a nice change from damage reports. Unsealing the first letter, he skimmed it to find absolutely nothing important. The second was slightly more interesting, Eren could marry any time after January the 1st, well whoops. Too late for that one. They were wank-jobs for sending marriage approval after Eren's tenure as prince passed. Levi didn't want the damn throne, he was beyond done with it all. He wanted to hold Eren's hand and proudly introduced him as his husband. His legally wedded Brat. Placing that one aside for Eren, he went about opening the third which wasn't important either. He didn't know why they bothered sending things like this in seperate letters. "Thank you for confirming repairs are required. Relevant contractors will contacted". Really? They wrote individual letters for this shit? What a waste. And relevant to what? The bakery people who's store had burnt down or the dude who wasn't happy that his new door was white instead of red. He should be happy he had a door at all. Picking up the next letter, he was distracted by a soft whine for their bed. Placing it back down, he moved back to Eren's side. Luca having already moved down the bed to give him space "Sweet Boy?" "Alpha..." "What's wrong?" "Want to shower..." "Sweet Omega, you've only just fallen asleep" "Sticky" Eren had been slicking like crazy. Not that Levi minded, but he could understand why Eren was less than keen on it "Let me clean you up while you rest?" "Horny too" Snorting through his nose, Levi shook his head "Ok. You rest and I'll clean you up" "Shower?" "No, you need to rest" "Mmm... don't want to get out of bed" Filling a bowl with warm water, Levi grabbed two towel before returning to his omega. Luca had jumped off the bed in the few moments he was gone, darting past him into the bathroom with a clearly accusing look on his face. It was hardly his fault that he couldn't keep his hands off Eren. It wasn't even sexual half the time, he simply enjoyed holding his omega close. Carefully placing the bowl down on the bedside table, he felt bad about what came next, Eren giving a loud unappreciative whine at having his bare arse exposed to the cold morning air. His husband's slick had formed a wet spot under him, then started soaking into his nightshirt. There wasn't much Levi could over the nightshirt. Grabbing the first towel, he folded it in half before lifting Eren's hips, his mate moaning as he tried to roll forward, presenting his glorious arse as he ground down against the bed in search of friction against his weeping erection. If he wanted to be cleaned up, he was going the wrong way about it "Eren..." "Alpha... horny... need you to fuck me" Laughing softly, Levi's hand went to Eren's hip "Let me clean you up first" "Want it now" "Be a good boy for your master, omega" Grabbing the second towel he dipped it into the warm water, Eren turning into a squirming mess as Levi wiped at his slick, more dribbling out with each careful movement of the towel, his legs climbing up the bed as he tried to climb onto his hands and knees while Levi held him in place "Levi... Levi... please just put it in already" "Soon, Sweet Boy" "Want it nooooow" God, that was precious. All Eren needed was the stamping of his foot and he'd pull of a whining child perfectly. Sliding his own hand down, Eren jerked himself as Levi cleaned him, it was tempting to punish him for his bad behaviour, but Levi didn't want to push the boundaries with spanking his mate while he was still more asleep than awake. They'd tried it again, Eren able to vocalise when it began too much without breaking down, yet it was something they still needed to work on and sending him spiralling this early in the morning would only lead to nightmares "Levi...?" Releasing he'd paused to admire Eren's twitching and sopping opening, Levi blew softly across the ring of muscle, Eren letting out a small sob "I need it" "Ok, baby. Shhh, your alpha's here" Careful, but not as careful, Levi wiped Eren's inner thighs clean, fighting a loosing battle as more slick ran down in long ribbons. Yeah. No. He needed inside his omega right now. His own tenting erection throbbing with need. Throwing the towel off the bed, Levi lined himself up. Taking Eren's roughly by the hips he pushed into his omega without warning, Eren screaming his name as he buried himself balls deep with the hard thrust. Fuck. Every single time felt like Eren was made just for him as he clenched and rippled deliciously around him. Pulling back he slammed in just as hard, setting himself a brutal pace as Eren clumsily tried to meet his thrusts, Eren's head hung as he panted "Fuck... fuck... harder... need it... ah... ah... don't-stop-don't-stop-don't-stop..." His enthusiastic husband wasn't making things easy, Eren might want it harder but he wasn't giving him enough space to drill him into the mattress like the omega wanted "Eren slow down" "Need it... mmm... need it..." Knowing he was going to leave bruises, Levi's grip tightened on Eren's hips forcing him to hold still as he rode him hard like he wanted "I'm gonna come... going to... god... Levi... ah..." "Come for me Brat!" "Levi! Ah!" Clenching around him, Eren went boneless. Levi barely able to pull back as he thrust in half a dozen more times before coming just as hard. Immediately loosening his grip, he slid his hands up around Eren's stomach to pull him onto his side, spooning around him as one hand began to rub at Eren's cum splattered swell. Kissing and nipping his omega's shoulder, Eren purred himself to sleep in his arms, his hips still wiggling against Levi despite being completely out of it. Well, there went doing the paperwork. Managing a few hours sleep, they were woken by Viren reminding them both that his morning feed was late and that he wasn't impressed over it. Sliding free from Eren was delayed by his knot, the alpha not surprised to find they'd gone at while they'd slept. Eren's pheromones were out of control around him, Levi's responding just as honestly, leaving them both love drunk on each other. Once free, he helped Eren sit up. His mate yawning widely as Levi went about cleaning himself up and fetching their fussy boy. Viren loved his morning cuddles, his arms reaching for Levi as Levi picked him up out of his cot, his cries still as intense, but kisses on his chubby cheeks earned him a cut of cry that turned into a squeal. As Eren settled down to feed, Levi retrieved the bowl and dropped towel, returning them to bathroom to find Luca sitting in the bathtub, fighting with the taps. His teeth bared like they were the enemy for simply being Luca proof. Relaxed from the high on his on, Levi placed the bowl and towel down in order to turn the taps on for his son. Luca chirping gratefully as Levi place the plug in and patted his boy on the head. He already had the two most perfect sons "Your mother's awake. Viren wanted his morning feed. What do you say we go play outside this afternoon? We can take your ball down?" Luca nodded at him, then promptly looked at the bath water, eyeing the lack of bubbles with annoyance. Pouring out a generous amount of bubble bath, Luca was in heave as the water began to bubble "Call me when the taps need to go off. Half full remember. We don't need to flood the bathroom again" Luca didn't reply "Luca. Do you understand me?" Huffing, his son was obviously rolling his eyes at him the best he could. The little dragon had inherited every ounce of Eren's sass "Good boy" Breakfast was delivered almost the moment Levi stepped out the bathroom, Levi forgetting his own nightgown was covered with dry slick as he answered the door. Not that he cared. He was proud of his little family and happily ready to fight anyone who threatened that peace. Including an awkward maid who couldn't look him in the face... Even Mikasa who was still on the outside loop of Eren's pregnancy. Eren was somewhat scared of telling his adopted sister that he was pregnant again, for the third time in his nearly 22 years of life. "Levi, can you come take him?" * "Levi, can you come take him?" Smiling down at his baby boy, Eren loved his morning feeds with Viren, the only problem was the morning sickness. He'd take all the cuddles he could get, yet the didn't stop the welling nausea. Placing the breakfast tray down, Levi was by his side in the next instant, lifting Viren from his nipple. Eren didn't even need to tell his husband what was happening, his mate the absolute perfect alpha as they navigated a newly turned seven month old who's curiosity couldn't be sated and morning sickness. He really couldn't ask for better alpha. Levi knew he was scared to tell Mikasa, he also knew how to keep Armin quiet which had lasted for a record breaking two weeks. If Eren could have his way he'd wait until he was further along, incase something went horribly wrong like he expected it to. The worse that happened so far was a nightmare where he'd come out of it swinging. Levi instantly knowing the blows weren't for him, yet it still scared the shit out of him. He could really do some damage if he let his magic or strength slip, and now that he was finally really starting to accept Levi wasn't going to leave him, he didn't want to fuck things up. Thankfully it only took throwing up for the better part of an hour for his stomach to settle, nothing at all like the long hours of the previous night. Luca soon abandoning his bath to curl into his side in silent support, like he used to in Marley. Gathering his son up, long limbs were everywhere as Eren carried Luca out to the bedroom, his son's tail going a million miles an hour as he chirped away having a whole conversation with himself that Eren couldn't understand "I thought I left him in the bath" "He loves his mother. He came to keep me company while I reacquainted myself with the toilet" Dumping his son down on the bed, Luca sprung up to shake himself off before running and jumping off the end, making a beeline back to the bathroom and his precious bubbles "And he loves his baths. Viren's been changed" Handing their pup over, Eren kissed his forehead "Thank you. Mummy is so sorry baby. Let's get you properly fed. Your sibling seems to think it's fun making me throw up" "Is it as bad as it was with him?" "What? The morning sickness or the pregnancy in general?" "Both?" Grabbing Levi's hand, Eren pulled him down to sit on their bed "The morning sickness wasn't great. I had Mikasa and Armin with me, but some days Mikasa's scent was too much. Luca was a great help. But when I was pregnant with Viren, I... I wanted him. I truly did, yet I feared he was Zeke's. I spent so long confused, fearing you'd never forgive me for carrying the child of another alpha. Fearing I'd never see you again. Hating you for leaving me. Hating you because I loved you still so much. Scared because I was pregnant for so long. Scared that something was terribly wrong. It was hard. It was so fucking hard. Dina tried to kill our child. Zeke found a conscious and tried to be better alpha for our child. I was so miserable, but I fell in love with him. His first kicks. Knowing he was alive and mine. I'd prepared myself to be locked away in Marley. To never see Eldia again. It was hard. I felt like my world had already crumbled into a million pieces. So, I'll take the morning sickness. I'll take feeling crappy. Because I want this pup, and you're here with me. You've been the best alpha I could ask for. You've been putting up with all my selfish whims and moods. But here... I have everyone. I don't have people trying to kill me. I'm not trying to navigate a relationship with an alpha I don't know. I have you. You're all I've ever wanted, Levi. Now we have these two amazing boys, and we'll be leaving after your birthday to make our new life together. So this pregnancy isn't bad. I'm scared something will go wrong, but if it does, I have you. I have Luca and Viren. I don't care if it's not always perfect. I know we both have things to work through. I know we both have nightmares and fears that need to heal. I know all this, yet, you make me so happy" Nuzzling his shoulder, Levi let out a soft sob. Moving his arm to wrap it around his husband, his hold on Levi's hand only broke for a moment. Levi held so much guilt and grief over leaving him. The words weren't meant to hurt his alpha, only to inform him that he truly felt things were better now "I love you, Levi" "Goddamn shitty brat, making me cry like this" "You're a big old softy" "Am not" "You haven't cut anyone down with your trademark glare in quite some time. There's even a rumour that you've been seen laughing and smiling" "Lies and slander. I'm an alpha" "Yes. A big scary alpha who's going to have to tell his sister in law that he's knocked up her brother again" "You want to tell her?" "I think maybe it's time. Tunics can only hide this stomach for so long" "Why don't you tell her while I look after the boys" Laughing lightly, Eren nuzzled into Levi's hair. It was just like nuzzling into Viren, their pup even naturally smelt like his father "I thought you were big and brave" "Your sister's scary" "She'll only be worse the longer we wait" "This is true. We'll go find her after breakfast" "If it goes badly, maybe you'll forget and get the chance to try again" Levi jabbed him in the ribs, Eren jumping at the unplanned attack and causing Viren to start crying. All he needed was Luca crying and he'd have the trifecta. Finding Mikasa wasn't hard, all they had to do was follow the yelling through the halls and up to Armin's quarters. Normally Armin would be in the sunroom by now, the beta seemingly suffering from the same desire as Eren, to stay in bed all day and hope the world didn't explode around them. Forcing a smile for the guards in front of Armin's room, he sympathised with them for having to suffering Mikasa's yelling so early in the morning, even Luca seemed put out by all the noise as Eren let them into the room. Scrambling off his bed, Armin launched himself at them "Eren! Save me!" "Eren, step away from the idiot" "I'm not an idiot! I forgot she was coming!" "We haven't even prepared quarters for her!" Chasing after Armin, Levi stepped between the angered alpha and the beta, preventing Mikasa from getting too close to him "What's happened? And does it really warrant chasing Armin around after yelling at him?" "This idiot forgot to notify us that Freya was flying down to check in with all of us, and to see how Eren was doing with Marley because Historia isn't available!" "It's not my fault I forgot!" Pinching the bridge of his nose, Levi sighed "Alright. It's not a big deal. Why don't you both sit down and calm down? Eren and I have something I wish to tell you both" Letting out an excited squeal, Armin practically skipped out from behind Eren, then was tackled to the bed by Mikasa where she started smacking him with a pillow. There was far too much energy for this early in the morning "Get off of me! I'm the prince!" "You're the Prince of Irresponsibility!" Wrestling for the pillow and failing, Armin yelled from his pinned position "Eren's pregnant!" Mikasa stopped dead, Armin taking the pillow and smacking her before straightening himself up "What?!" Levi sounded pissed, his voice like a whip "Armin!" "I'm sorry, she was bashing me and I panicked!" Climbing off the bed, Mikasa moved to stop a few steps in front of him, Eren finding Viren's hair extremely interesting as his sister stared a hole right through him "You're pregnant?" "It wasn't planned..." Feeling his anxieties rising, Levi reached out to pull him up against him "I... you... what?! How? And so soon after Viren? What happened to waiting? Is it safe? Are you alright? Are you sure? Does Europe know? Have they said anything? And how did Armin known before I did?" Growling a warning, Levi stopped the barrage of questions "He's fine. He's been getting plenty of rest, and we've been working things out together. No, it wasn't planned or expected. Yes things will be hard once the next pup comes, but he's healed from giving birth to Viren, and he has his alpha for support. Armin found out the night of the ball when Eren had a small moment in the bathroom and needed his best friend. I'm honestly surprised he hasn't told you about this, or that we wed in secret over a month ago" "You wed Armin?" Mikasa's shock had gotten the best of her "No, Mikasa. Levi and I wed. Europe wouldn't give me permission and I wanted to spend our honeymoon together during my heat. Only, my heat never came and well... you're going to be an Aunty again. I think it might be a clutch, or a really large pup..." Nervously trying to laugh it failed. Mikasa looked ready to kill him "We didn't plan it, but I'm ok. Levi's been really good..." What else was he supposed to say? "You got married without us?" "Uh..." "You're always going off and leaving us behind... how could you... not invite us? Do we not mean that much to you?" That hurt. Mikasa should know better than to say such things. She knew how much he wished to marry Levi. She knew how much Levi meant to him, and how done he was with Europe "It wasn't like that... you were training..." "You could have waited!" "I wanted to marry Levi before my heat came! I didn't ask for my heat not to come! I didn't realise it was even late to begin with because Viren is teething! You and Armin are my family, but so is Levi! He's my alpha! He's the father of my children and after Europe, I wanted... I wanted this so badly. I'm sorry you're disappointed, and we did plan to have a second wedding, but now I guess that means nothing to you" Sniping back at his sister did nothing to make him feel better "Eren... I'm just... I didn't mean it like that. Of course you deserve to be happy, it's just... why didn't you tell me sooner?" "I would have waited to tell Armin too if he hadn't caught me in the bathroom" "Enough negativity you two. We've had enough of that to last a lifetime. We can finally celebrate!" Mikasa wasn't quite done "Are you sure about this?" "I am. I'm in a better place than I was in Marley, and Levi's been amazing. Luca's been amazing too. Viren's just starting to crawl, he's babbling and happy other than the fact he's teething. This baby wasn't planned, but most of my life hasn't been. I'd really like it if you could be happy for us" "I am... I just want the best for you" "Levi's what's best for me. And now that we've let you know, we'll let you get back to yelling at Armin for forgetting Freya is coming to visit" Historia hadn't told him anything about a visit in her last letter... and that wasn't all that long ago. He was going to have to write her back before Freya arrived to tell her his news himself "Did you have to remind her! I was good! I didn't tell for two weeks!" Levi let out a sigh "Mikasa, stop yelling at him and get the maids to make up a room for her and assumedly Steege. If she's here to review the paperwork for Marley, we should probably have something prepared" "Or we could go back to bed?" Smacking his arse lightly, Levi then groped at the spot "That's enough you two! Not in front of my nephew's" Poking his tongue out at Armin, Eren still couldn't quite meet Mikasa's eyes. He could smell her pain in the air, leaving his guts churning with guilt. Eren didn't quite get around to penning his letter to Historia. Sorting the mail Levi had started, he lost it laughing when he saw he had the marriage approval. So much for that. They really should have known better, they should have known him better than that. Setting it aside, the rest of the mail proved to be as boring as Levi assured him it was. His mate proving enough of a distraction that he forgot Freya was coming as they headed down to the training oval to spend a few hours with Luca. Eren opting to sit on the sidelines with Viren, rather than risking upsetting his tender stomach. Besides, it was nice to watch Levi running around like an idiot with Luca, Luca having a mind of his own when it came to his ball. With a little bit of magic and a whole lot of praying, by some miracle they were still using the same first ball. The carousel they bought at the same time was now well out the reach of Luca and his curious claws which had taken out two horses, before Eren was alert by his son's mournful cries. Sitting Viren up between his legs, his boy was straight up, trying to crawl on the grass only to be stopped by Eren's legs being in the way. Scooping up his pup, he held him under the arms as Viren squealed, his legs moving like he was trying to walk but he was a way off it yet "Come here, baby boy. Luca and daddy are playing so we have to cheer Luca on. Your daddy is the only one who stands a chance of getting that ball back" Bending his knees, Viren dropped his weight into Eren's hand, Eren sitting him down in front of him tipping him back before he could make another attempt at an escape, stuffing his hand in his mouth, Viren really wasn't sure about everything, only making his son that much more adorable. Being a mum was by far the most satisfying role he'd ever played in his life, though being Levi's omega was pretty damn close. He might be the one living his life, yet both roles were so dear to him that maybe they even tied... no, not quite. He adored both roles and couldn't decide between them as they both meant different things to him. Playing with Viren's hair, he was more than content to sit and watch the world go by. Levi was still chasing after Luca when Freya and Steege. Luca once again enamoured by Steege as the elder dragon landed close to where Eren was seated with Viren. His son bursting into tears as they were hit with a gust of wind from Steege's strong wings, Eren moving him up to his shoulder to hush him, oblivious to the fact Steege and Freya weren't alone "Look what the dragon dragged in! Knocked up again there, Eren?!" Snapping his head up, Ymir grinned broadly at him, Historia standing next to her with two tiny dragons fighting for attention in her hold "Historia!" Armin hadn't told him Historia was coming, and Eren couldn't get to his feet soon enough as she jogged over to him. The princess practically glowing as they both met a few steps from where they started "Oh my gosh! Is that my little Viren?" "Historia! You didn't tell me your clutch had hatched!" Their words overlapped, Historia giggling as she nodded "Yes! Freya mentioned she was coming to see you, so I simply had to come" Like their parents, the two tiny dragons had a mix of pinks and whites through their scales. Eren tearing up as four black eyes blinked at him, her two were already bigger than Luca than when he'd hatched "Historia, they're beautiful" "Of course they're beautiful. My rider makes beautiful babies" Historia giggled, Ymir wrapping her arm around Historia's waist protectively "Ignore Ymir, she's so beyond proud" "I would be too. Gods. It's so good to see you. What are their names?" "Krista and Mira if they're girls. We haven't picked names for them being boys" "They're good names" "Enough of this, you're making me sick. Who knocked you up again?" "Levi, who else?" Ymir scrunched her nose up, Historia stomping on her foot "You never told me!" "I've only just told Mikasa. That was scary enough, though I think she took the fact I married Levi in secret even worse. Luca's excited as far as I can tell. Viren doesn't know any better. It wasn't planned at all, but we're happy. Tell me more about your girls..." "You got married! Eren, you are in so much trouble! You, me, now. I need to know everything" "Historia, give him a chance to breathe before you go stealing him away" Carrying Luca's ball over, Levi smiled at the situation. Having not put her two dragons down, Historia was trying to hold him by the arm at the same time. Her girls had caught sight of Luca, and both were trying to escape to get to him. Ymir had covered her face with her hand, with her thumb and pointer at the corners of her eyes. Shaking her head, she dropped her hand with a sigh "Right. Krista and Mira, that is Eren's son Luca. You'll meet him properly soon. Historia, you can't hold the girls and hold onto Eren's arm. Eren, this is all your fault for getting her excited. You know exactly how she gets" "He didn't tell me you two wed!" Laughing at Historia, Ymir glared at Levi "Sorry. Europe didn't give us a firm answer, so Eren went ahead and planned it all. We received news today that we may wed after the first of January" "Yes, well, Europe doesn't exactly like. They told me I'll be holding this post for 6 months, and that it'll need to spend a month training my replacement, yet, that hasn't happened yet" Looking towards Levi, Ymir sighed again "They're as bad as each other. I thought you would have trained your by now" "Trained mine? Mine's married with two children and another on the way. He's been behaving himself until yours arrived" "I don't think Eren knows how to behave. You've already knocked him up again" "Like you haven't tried the same with Historia" "Alright. Alright. That's enough you four. Eren, it's wonderful to see you again. Congratulations on your wedding and your coming clutch. Levi, please don't put ideas into Ymir's mind. Krista and Mira are a handful and a half as it is" Placing her hands on her younger sister's shoulders, Freya gave him a nod. Eren's eyes wide as he looked to his stomach "What do you mean a clutch? I'm having a pup. A pup. Then going back on birth control" Levi looked just as alarmed. They'd talked it being a clutch, but talking and knowing for sure was different "I'll bet gold you're having a clutch" "I think that's enough for now. Shall we head up to the castle? Armin's probably still being yelled at by Mikasa. He forgot to notify her you were coming so Mikasa yelled at him while smacking him with a pillow" Giggling, Historia let Ymir take one of their daughters into her arms "Krista loves Ymir. Mira was named after her mother, yet she prefers to stay by my side. I've tried sitting them on my shoulder's like how Luca used to sit upon yours, but the girls aren't keen" "They'll grow into it. Luca, will you show everyone to the castle for me? I need to talk to daddy for a moment" Historia knew about Levi's memory issues, Eren wanting to make sure Levi remembered everything since their 6 visitors from Draecia had arrived. Taking the silent hint, Historia was happy to follow Luca. Soldiers had already begun moving from the direction of the castle, and Eren only wanted a moment with Levi. Waiting until the group moved away, Eren passed Viren to his father, Levi biting the inside of his cheek as he took him "Levi. Do you... remember?" Placing his free hand on Eren's stomach, the omega took that was a "no" "I haven't forgotten anything. That I can think of at any rate. Do you really believe it's a clutch?" "I don't know... I don't know how far along I am. But... if it's a clutch..." Tapering his sentence off, his husband shook his head. Proving once again to be a mind reader "If it is, we'll get through it" "A clutch. I... Levi, that could mean multiples. That... I had 16 eggs. 16. What if... what if I go that many again? What if..." "You're spiralling, Sweet boy" "I don't know how to... Levi, how can I do that to you? How do I make sure Viren and Luca don't feel left out? What if..." "No. Eren..." "I'm freaking out!" Freaking out was putting it mildly as his heart raced. 16 was tooooo many kids. He couldn't... oh god... what if this clutch was even bigger? How big was he going to get? Would Levi still love him when he looked fit to burst? "I can tell. But you know we'll get through this" He'd barely gotten through things the first time around, and now Freya was happily announcing he was having a clutch. There was suspecting and knowing... and now there was panicking "I..." "You're going to come through this. We're going to come through this. Together, ok?" Groaning in a twisted panic, Eren's omega couldn't be happier over it all. Being filled with a clutch was the ultimate goal when breeding, so his secondary dynamic was over the moon at the idea of giving Levi enough children to start their own personal regiment. His arse on the other hand, had firmly clenched and it was big fat no at the idea of pushing eggs out of there again... Besides, if he was in labour for three days like he'd been delivering his first clutch, what would Luca and Viren do? Who would look after them? He didn't want to go that long without being with his babies. He didn't want to scare them with labour. He didn't want to put Luca through another dose of magical mayhem that labour brought with it. If they left the castle, who would help them? What if something went wrong? What if he died? What if Levi... what if he died? What if Levi wandered off and forgot they'd moved? What if his alpha forget he was in labour and he had to deliver alone, with both boys crying? Weak at the knees, Eren gripped his chest as he stumbled before fainting with a solid thud. * With a low groan, Eren woke with an aching head and something wet running down the side of his face. Smacking it away, the annoying presence sighed loudly at him "He's awake" Ymir? What was... right. Draecia. Right "Eren?" There was Levi. A soft hand landing on his belly filling him with warmth that could only come from his husband. Coughing lightly, he tried to prop himself up as he pushed his eyes open. The world spinning slightly as he aborted his attempt "Slow down, brat. You scared the fuck out of me" "What happened?" "You fainted. Hit your head on the only damn rock on the oval. Only you could be that stupid" Ah, Ymir. How he'd missed her frankness "Sorry" With a growl, Eren felt Levi move to sit up beside him. From the feel of it, he was on the lounge chair in the sunroom rather in his and Levi's quarters. He wasn't sure though why he was there or why the side of his head was wet "It's alright. You're ok. Historia forced Ymir to stay in case you weren't feeling well when you woke. They're having lunch in the dining room with everyone else" "I'm fine. Sorry, Ymir. You should get back to Krista" "She'd only send me back up here. You're lucky you didn't hurt your clutch" "It's... a clutch?" "Congratulations. He's just as stupid as he was before his fall. I think he's going to be just fine" Levi growled at Ymir again, his alpha smelt pissed "If you're not going to help, then go back to your partner" Levi should know better than take the bait "Guys. Stop. I'm ok. Headache, and that's it" Placing her palm on his forehead, the pain lessened marginally "There we go. Your own magic really should have taken care of anything anyway. There's nothing physically wrong with you. I'm going to head down, Levi looks ready to explode" "Thanks, Ymir. We'll be down soon" "I doubt it" Levi's scent finally evened out once the door closed signalling that Ymir had left the room. His husband's voice soft as placed his head on Eren's chest "Historia checked you after you fell. It's a clutch. She didn't inform the others, though Freya and Steege probably heard her" "Fuck..." "Is that what upset you before? The idea of having a clutch?" "I'm scared" "Oh, Sweet Boy. You don't need to be scared" "What if it's more than two? What if it's like 8. 8 children Levi. I can't... What if I go into labour and you're not here? Or... you forget?" "Shhh. 8 eggs will be work, but..." "But?! How can you but? Levi, my clutch... the last clutch..." "Sweet Boy, you're spiralling. You're going to pass out all over again if you don't calm down for me. Yes, a clutch isn't what we expected, but I'm not mad or sad over it. I know it's going to take a lot of work, but we have help. I can't promise I won't forget. If you're worried about being alone, Mikasa or Armin could come stay in your final weeks? Probably Armin more than Mikasa, or we could fly up to Draecia. The most important thing in the pregnancy is you, and I'm not leaving you to go through any of this alone. Besides, once the clutch is birthed, we still need to wait for the eggs to hatch. They may not even hatch all at once? I don't know how all of this really works, but you're not alone through it all" Reaching up, Eren wrapped his arms around his husband. Tears rolling down his face as he sniffled "Thank you. I knew we talked about having a clutch, but there's hearing and knowing and thinking... and we don't have jobs, or a house, and more mouths to feed and... and it's all..." "A bit much?" "Way too much" "You're not alone there. It threw me for a loop too. Luca seems to know what it means, he's been sitting by your feet guarding both you and Viren since we reached the sunroom" "I knew it was the sunroom. The lounge is good for naps when Armin starts talking too much" "The lounge is also good for other things" Eren groaned, of course Levi would turn it sexual "I didn't say anything" "You didn't have to" "I meant, it's good for sitting and reading" "Right. Sure you did. I know what you're like" There was moment too long of silence between them, Eren's nerves growing as he released Levi, not sure if he'd overstepped "What? What is it?" "Nothing" Stupid bond. He'd missed it like crazy when he couldn't feel his mate, yet now it was betraying him "Eren?" "I... I'm just... so fucking scared" "Here, hop up for a moment" "Hopping up isn't happening" "Give me a sec then" Moving to lift him, Levi settled them back down so Eren was propped up in his lap with his arm along his alpha's chest and forehead resting against the side of his mate's head. Placing his hand back on his belly, Levi rubbed the small bump "I'm serious. I'm not letting you go through this alone. I'm not leaving you alone, and as you grow closer to your due date, we'll organise things so we have help" "I don't want Luca to go through all that again" "We'll take care of it" "What if I go into labour early?" "Then we'll take care of it" Eren was growing tired of hearing the same words promised. Huffing at his husband, he place this own hand over Levi's to lift it off his stomach "You can't make promises you might not be able to keep" "I'm not..." "You are. You can't promise you won't forget. You can't promise everything will go smoothly. You can't promise you won't walk out the door and not return because you've forgotten all about us. I... I'm sorry. My mouth is doing that thing again" Insecurities were fucking horrible. He hated when his mood dropped so sharply that he didn't know how he'd bounce back from it all "Where you spiral? I noticed, Sweet Omega. How about I promise you I'm going to try my fucking hardest to be everything you want and need for the rest of our lives. I promise to try not to forget things. And I promise not to make promises that I have every full intention of keeping, yet might not be able to" "I know... God knows how good you are to me. I just don't want... I don't want to lose you. I don't want to force you into a situation where you feel like you're drowning. I don't want... to die and leave you..." "You're not going to die" "Birth is hard. You thought you lost me last time..." "I didn't lose you. And last time I didn't understand why your magic wasn't working as it should, or as it did with our clutch. It was scary as hell, but we made it through. We made it through both times, and we know now that birthing is easier for you in your dragon form when it comes to clutch. We're both still learning. We're going to move out to build our little cottage that you want, with space for our boys and for these little ones, and we're going to have that orchard, and a hothouse for your herbs, and I'm going to try grow vegetables... which, let's face it, will probably need help from your magic to survive. We'll trade them for what we need, or I can pick up the odd job with Isabel and Farlan. You can brew up your weird teas to sell. It's not going to be an easy life, but it's going to be nice and simple. No wars. No mountains of paperwork. No glitzy glamorous parties that I know you love. We'll be together, in a space where we can be ourselves" The sincerity of Levi's words had him breaking down into soft sobs "I wish we weren't married. I'd marry you all over again if we could" "I'd marry you all over again too. Talk me ok? I want to know everything that goes through that head of yours" "Even all the shit?" "Even all the shit. All the confusing shit. All the things you're being a stubborn shit over. Every shit thing you said at our wedding" Nuzzling into Levi's hair, Eren pressed a kiss there "Thank you. I'm sorry that my melancholy is all over the place" "I know, Sweet Boy. You have no need to apologise. All these things you're fearing, I fear too. So don't think you're all alone" "You should have told me" "You should have told me too" "I was unconscious" "Minor detail. No, I can't quite laugh it off yet. Are you really sure you're ok?" "Just a little headache. It'll be gone in no time" "You shouldn't have a headache to begin with" "Like Ymir said, I had to hit the only rock. The damage is gone, it's just lingering pain from the incident. But, if you're really worried, you can tell me why my hair and face were so wet" "Luca. He was trying to wake you up and he kind of bit your hair when you wouldn't" His poor baby boy. Patting the lounge, Luca trilled softly as his wet nose found Eren's hair "Thank you, baby. Mummy's ok now" Huffing, Levi joked lightly "Oh, so he gets thanked, and what do I get for carrying you all the way up here?" "You get me" "I can live with that" "Good, because I'm not going anywhere without you" "I'm amazingly ok with that. If you're feeling up to it, do you want to head down to the dining room?" Eren shook his head, the lounge equalled nap time in his mind now "Take a nap with me" "I don't think we can take a nap" "Of course we can. I'm too comfy to move, and you give excellent cuddles" "You're just a big sook for cuddles" "Mhmm. I'm pregnant, pamper me" "I'll pamper your pregnant arse all you like" And back to the sexual innuendos. All he wanted was to nap like this "Why did that sound like a threat?" "It's not a threat, it's a promise" "Promise to save it for the bedroom" "Mmm. Maybe... you are being terribly adorable" "You're being terribly you" "I'll take the compliment" He couldn't win. Shuffling down in Levi's hold, Eren let out a sleepy sigh. Whether Levi liked it not, he was taking a nap and his alpha wasn't going to stop him. * Creeping back into the room, Levi pushed his instincts down as their friends entered. Eren had fallen asleep against him, the omega trusting him to protect him as he rested, seemingly oblivious to how shaken Levi was over his fainting spell. Having talked about it, Levi understood where his husband was coming from, but to see Eren collapse like that, then to see the blood oozing from his head... his heart had stopped. He vaguely remembered yelling for help, Viren starting to scream as Levi nearly crushed him doubling over to make sure Eren was still breathing. With his hand splayed protectively over his mate's swell, his instincts weren't as bad as they could have been. Eren and their clutch were both fine. A clutch they'd joked about, and now was sending Eren into fits of panic. He understood just how much of a big deal it could be. He'd been there the first time around, and knew how exhausting it'd been for Eren to give birth, yet he needed to remain strong for his omega. "How is he?" Sitting on the coffee table, Historia placed her daughters on the floor. The rest of their friends hovering near Armin's desk in an attempt at "privacy". The pair of dragons immediately curious about Luca, yet Luca remained steadfast between them and Viren. The boy sleeping with his head on the dragon's tail "We talked. He's a little overwhelmed, but we'll get there" "That's good. I was worried something was wrong when Ymir returned without you" "No. He said he had slight headache, and insisted on napping" Smiling softly, Historia placed her hand on Levi's. Her magic sparkling warmly through his body "You're as exhausted as he is" "I'm fine. I was playing with Luca before you arrived, and once he's got his ball, he's a devil to get it back off" "He's grown to be such a beautiful young dragon. Are things still alright, with raising him?" "Yeah. We hit a few difficulties, but we're working it out. He adores Viren, and loves to cuddle into Eren when he's sick with morning sickness. He's very protective of both of them really" "Good. That's good. Eren never wrote that you wed, or that he was pregnant again" "I think he wanted to, before Freya and Steege arrived. He would have wanted to tell you himself. We ended up playing with the boys instead" "Levi, I assure it it's perfectly fine. As long as you're both happy and alright" "We're getting there. But from that comment, I take it he's filled you in" On his memory issues "Yeah. I'm sorry. He was wondering if there was a way we could help. There isn't that I know it. I'm sorry" "I didn't expect things to be that easy. I knew he was scared, but he just admitted he's scared of giving birth me there in case I wander off when he needs me the most" Historia's smile dropped, her eyes filling with tears. She was so much like Eren that it was laughable "Oh, Levi..." "It is what it is" "No. No, it's not. You have us. All of us. Eren's only a few months along, how about I talk to him when he wakes? I can be here for you both to help. Your instincts will probably be less severe around me than another alpha" That's why he'd suggested Armin, or even Moblit if he could convince him to go through all of that again "I must admit, I'm not sure how I intend to deal with that. I just didn't want to worry him even more" "Then it's organised. I never would have suggested a clutch so openly had I known..." "It was Freya, not you. It's not like we didn't talk about it, but I think given his first time birthing was a clutch, the emotional scars still linger" Not that Viren's birth had been easy either "That's completely understandable. I know it hasn't been easy for him being stuck here either. The truth is that's why Freya has flown down, to help facilitate the meeting between Eren and the new family that will taking control of Marley until a proper government can be formed. She's been back and forth over the past few months. I'll save the rest for when Eren wakes again, but is there anything you need right now?" He needed to pee, yet there was no way in hell he was letting Eren go when he was like this "No, we're alright. Thanks. Luca will probably wake soon, he'll be hungry and possibly need changing. Luca won't let him out of his sight, not while Eren is like this" "It'll be excellent practice for when our girls take their human forms" "Uh. About that..." "It varies depending on the amount of magic. The lesser the magic, the sooner they should turn human given you're a pure-blooded human" Snorting, Levi shook his head "You sound like you were prepared for this" "For the future. I didn't think this future would come so soon. Yet..." "We're an unusual case so the normal rules don't necessarily apply" Nodding quickly, Historia found her smile again "Yes. I'm sorry. I feel like I'm always falling back to the same excuse" "No, I understand. Eren's hurting deeply, but it's relieving to know he was you" "And he has you. He hasn't given up on you. He'll never give up on you" "I know. It's... it's a heavy chain. I don't want to pull him down with me, but he's what anchors me" "You'll be fine. I know it. Any time you need to talk, Levi, I'm happy to listen. Heaven knows I listened to all of Eren's tales of his lover when he lived with us" "It's crazy how things have played out" "It is. Life is never dull with the pair of you around. How about I send for some food? For when he wakes?" "He'll probably be hungry. His appetite has been..." "Enormous? A clutch is like that" Levi couldn't stop himself from asking "Is there any way to know. How many are in there? How many... he's... you know..." "Going to birth? No. As the fertilised eggs grow, they feed on the empty eggs. So each of them contain both your essence and his. At the moment, the eggs are still swelling, gathering magic so he will become much larger sooner rather than later. You're looking a little pale. This is a lot. Take a moment, I'll organise things" Down near Historia's feet there was a scuffle. Levi cursing his short stature as he couldn't see what was going on. Reaching down, one of Historia's daughters was plucked into her hold "Sorry. There very curious about Viren and Luca wasn't having it. Do you mind if I move him? The girls aren't used to a human child" If Viren was hurt, Levi would probably lose control of his alpha. His heart beat had sped up as it was "Thank you. Luca won't be happy, but it's better he's safe" "I'm so sorry to disturb him. Ymir... honestly... you should see the three of them. They're all as bad as each other" "And you love it" Historia giggled "Is it that obvious?" "I understand. Viren's only started crawling and he's already trying to make an escape nonstop. I remember how curious Luca was about everything too" Luca wanted to know everything, see everything and be involved in absolutely everything... exactly like he did now... he might have grown in size, yet he was still the same Luca at heart. He's beautiful and curious son. Eren's nap lasted a little over an hour, his omega embarrassed to find their friends waiting for him to wake, then further embarrassed when Mikasa started fussing over him. Levi was sure Eren was giving his best attempt at becoming one with him, or passing through him, in attempt to hide from all the attention being directed his way. Kissing Eren's temple, his husband shyly uncurled from his position slowly, his moves clumsy as he yawned during the process. Unable to let the omega go completely, Levi settled Eren down to sit between his legs, arms wrapped around his waist as Eren obscured his view of their friends "Sorry I fell asleep" "It's perfectly fine. It gave Levi and I a chance to talk. I was hoping we could talk a little now that you're awake" Mikasa shot Historia a scowl which went unnoticed, Eren nodding as he yawned again "I'm sorry... all I want to do is nap lately" "Growing a clutch takes a lot out of you. Maybe we should return to your quarters?" Levi's bladder was very much for the idea, especially with Eren leaning against his stomach "If it's work related then we need to go to the royal library. I think Freya mentioned something about work? You'll need to give me a moment, I'm still waking up" "Right. Yes. Straight into work, you haven't changed a bit, though you will need to give me directions, I find myself completely confused within the castle. We came to visit and to help you with the whole Marley thing. Freya has some things she needs to discuss with you now that you're awake, and I'm curious to see just how many papers they sent you. You said you were buried in them, but knowing you, that was an exaggeration" "I don't blame you over getting lost. Levi's lived here almost all his life and he still gets lost" Flicking Eren's ear, there was no real malice in the action "Watch it, you" "It's true" "You don't need to tell everyone" "Fine. Do you mind if we stop by the bathroom on the way?" "Not at all. You should eat though, before we go. I don't want you passing out again. You scared all of us" Letting out a soft whine, Eren's scent spiked with guilt "She means we're all relieved that you're ok. You didn't do anything wrong" "It's embarrassing" "It's not embarrassing. Historia insisted on making sure you had something available to eat once you woke" "I am kind of hungry..." "Then eat" "Kind of hungry" translated to Eren eating three sandwiches before declaring he was full. Mikasa watching his every bite didn't help, but somehow Freya knew that as she diverted the female alpha's attention away so Eren wouldn't feel so self conscious. Maybe it was the fact that Eren was pregnant, but out of the group Ymir was the only one who didn't seem weirdly protective of Eren. He'd have to ask Historia about it the next time he had a chance. Leaving Armin with Mikasa to tend to Eldia's paperwork, Eren was all smiles as he held Viren close to him. His husband having a hard time passing him over to Historia so that both of them could use the bathroom closest to the library, before finally reaching their destination. Holding the door for the small party, Luca rounded up the rear, chased by Historia's girls as they tried to play with him. If he wasn't so worried about his mother, Levi was sure their son would be making friends. He'd have to have Eren sit down and explain to Luca that being a kid and enjoying himself was his main priorities or Luca ran the risk of missing his childhood and all the fun that came with it. The thought unintentionally forgotten almost as quickly as it crossed his mind. "What do you think?" Eyeing the piles of paperwork, Historia and Freya shared a long look "It's worse than we expected" Snorting, Eren carried Viren over to the chair he favoured, settling down to feed their pup "Most of its sorted. Europe only ever replied when they felt like it. I prioritised repairs and displaced people first. Those needing medical aid or help with bills, all of which was sent through to Europe" "I know" Looking at Freya on confusion, Levi had forgotten it was Historia who'd explained things to him "Steege and I have been frequently back and forth to Europe. First with Magath's trial, then to offer advice on how to proceed with Marley. You had some very good ideas. I know Asana was terribly impressed. She would have pushed harder for things to go your way, but the council didn't appreciate that you spoke your mind and stood your ground" Asana, who? What now? Eren seemed as confused, even with his cherry red blush "You. What... you saw what I wrote? And who is Asana?" "What happened to Magath and his men?" "Of course I saw what you wrote. It's a little complicated" Levi's worse muddled with Freya's as they accident spoke over each other. Eren's bright eyes were quick to look down to Viren at the mention of Magath, his omega seemingly folding in on himself "Magath received the same sentencing as Dina. He and his men separated and sent to seperate work prisons. I thought that best to prevent loss of life. As for Asana, she is the woman with the dark skin that you and Levi both found beautiful. Her and husband Onyankopon both originate from countries that once lie where Marley is now. Their family escaping persecution by fleeing to Europe, though much of their culture has still been lost, Asana comes from a long line of priestesses who were known for their magical powers. Marley slaughtering most of them when they refused to cooperate. She was thoroughly impressed and taken by you, and your comments. She doesn't have senses as good as ours, but she heard what you said" Eren turned redder "Kill me now" "Why? It was a kind compliment. You spoke of her strength and kindness. For her to have her strength recognised is the greatest kind of compliment in her culture. She regrets that she couldn't have openly supported you more. Though she really does like you, and she admires that you managed to speak your mind so freely and repeatedly in such a situation" Eren couldn't possibly blush any harder, Levi's own cheeks a dusty pink. His husband mumbling "I feel like an idiot" "You're not the only one. So Asana... you trust her with Marley?" "It won't just be her. Our father has... well, he's no longer fit to run Draecia in a full time manner. He stirred more than a little trouble protesting Dina's innocence and got himself caught up in the whole mess. Historia and our oldest brother will be sharing in the majority of the royal duties now, while Steege and myself will be based mostly in Marley. There are still plenty of dragon related artefacts to be recovered, and much for Asana to learn of our culture" Eren glared at Historia, a frown in his lips "You didn't tell me any of this!" "I know. I'm sorry. It's been so complicated and talking to you has been the breath of fresh air I needed. I promise I did intend to, then Freya mentioned that the tribunal didn't wish for everything to be known yet. I wasn't even supposed to know what was going on, plus I've been avoiding the manor since I had the twins" "Some warning would have been nice. I've been trapped within these walls since returning, worried that Europe was burning everything I wrote, and messing with me at every turn" Freya replied instead of Historia "Your suggestions went in front of the tribunal. You didn't exactly make yourself friends, but Asana really respected that you wanted to give every region a voice. She especially loved your trade hubs. I know she wished to be here, but she has so much to organise before she moves down to Marley with Onyankopon. I've only met him twice, but he seems a good man" None of this was sitting quite right with Levi "Do you believe we can trust them?" "I believe they want to see a new dawn for Marley. They intend on holding up their end of the treaty with both Eldia and Draecia, and they wish to help those along the border towns. It's a mammoth job, but we're all going to try our hardest to make sure nothing like this ever happens again" "Then you can start with the paperwork. I've made a stack of papers that relate directly to... to Dina and Zeke. I couldn't deal with them, but maybe you can? It should give you a good idea of how to guide the country and what was going on behind the scenes, so who to befriend and such. Levi knows where they are" There was layer of steel in Eren's tone, hidden beneath the calmness of his words. Eren was taking this all badly. His husband's confidence knocked about even further by the realisation that his friends had to hold their tongues thanks again to Europe. Levi would punched out most of the tribunal had they been in the room "Well this is a shitfest. You probably know how hard he's been trying to help Marley. It's not been easy when he isn't even allowed to go their physically to assess what the people need the most. That's what really needs to happen. There needs to be a felt presence there" "I had hoped to visit sometime next week..." Eren deflated further, Levi's concern leaving his alpha pacing and lashing out at the confines of his mind "I think for now you need to deal with this alone. Eren, we're going back to our quarters" Eren had the nerve to blink at him "I have to work" "You don't have to do anything. Freya is here and she needs to familiarise herself with these papers. All you'll be doing is watching, which isn't necessary" "I'm feeding Viren" "Then we'll go when you're finished" "You're being rude" "No. I'm being your alpha. You nearly broke yourself trying to sort all this out. Those sleepless nights. Crying over the things Dina did. Crying over what happened to Zeke. Europe could have eased your suffering by mentioning Freya was still assisting. There was no reason for them to deny our wedding. No reason to leave you stressing over who your successor would be. Even if they didn't wish to disclose them by name, they could have at least mentioned that Freya would be assisting. Then you would have known you at least had someone else on your side. The way they treated you because you weren't a weak and subservient omega pisses me the hell off. You're so much more than they fucking let themselves see, and their all a bunch of dick sucking pigs for closing their minds to you. You've already collapsed once today, and I refuse to let them send you into a drop or something similar!" "Yelling at our friend's changes nothing. It's no different from when you and Erwin swore me to secrecy. It's no different as to when we were hiding Armin's true heritage. We both know the ins and outs of this game. We both know that Europe held no love towards me, especially after I lashed out when Willy was murdered. The fact they finally have someone who can clean up this mess... it's hope. Can't you see that?" Hope. For Eren it would be. Someone swooping in to save the whole of Marley. To prevent more suffering of their people, and to start mending the harm caused by Dina. However, Levi wasn't ready to forgive so easily. Eren was his whole fucking world, and he'd been hurt far too deeply by all of this. This and fainting earlier. He needed to get his mate to somewhere where he could control the situation. Somewhere he could protect his family. His alpha was screaming so loudly in his mind to do so, it was affecting every ounce of him. "Eren, we're not offended. I wasn't there for most of the trial, but I know it's wasn't easy. When I learned that you nearly died... my heart broke. I wanted to come right back to help, yet I couldn't. You've carried this burden for far too long. Please rest. Freya, Steege and I can see what you've been doing, then consult with you over anything we're confused about" Eren huffed "I'm fine" "I know. But think about Levi. He saw you collapse today, and he's been by your side through this. I can feel the swirling emotions within him. He needs you as much as you need him. Go with him" Looking to him, his husband's unhappy expression melted. By now Eren probably knew exactly what every expression on his face meant, even when he was trying his hardest not to let the omega feel his anger or pain through their bond "Alright. I have some more papers in our quarters anyway. Are you sure you'll be alright here? It feels so rude to wake up, eat, then desert you here" "We'll be fine. If we need anything, we'll ask the guards" "Make sure you do..." Viren was still feeding as Eren rose, his tunic displaced and exposing his both his breasts now that he was standing. Reaching up, Historia adjusted the garment for him "... we'll see you at dinner. I still have so much I wish to talk to you about" "You too. It's so good to see you again" The walk back to their quarters was silent other than the clicking of Luca's claws on the stone floors, both of them lost in thought. Reaching their room, Levi held the door for Eren and Luca, before locking it once closed. Having moved to sit on their bed, the alpha joined his husband, resting his head on Eren's shoulder "I didn't mean to blow up" "I know" "I hate when people look down on you. Nothing upsets me more" "I know, but we can't be yelling at our friends" "It... I know how all of this works, but when it comes to you, I want to throw all the confusion and all the rules out window" "I know you want to protect me. But we both know the game. Yes, it hurt. It hurt so fucking much and I feel like a fucking fool for each and every single one of my suggestions that was seen by Freya, but she's a real princess. Moving against the tribunal could have spelt real trouble for Draecia and I don't want that. We've come so far with them. They've gone from a treaty of nonintervention to our greatest allies. And now Marley will be handed back to its people. That's everything we could have hoped for" "It doesn't make any of this ok" "Levi, it's a new dawn. I said so when Armin was crowned in March, and I'll say it again. Things are finally changing. Our day will come where there's peace. It won't be for everyone, because there's no way a utopian society could ever exist. Jealousy and greed have been bred right down into what makes us human, but finally the day is dawning where things won't be so bad" Sighing, Levi placed his hand on Eren's knee "It's been a bloody long night for dawn to only be dawning now" "It has been. But we need to believe the darkness is finally over" "Do you really think that's the case?" "I do" "I guess I'll need to follow your lead on this one. I feel as if I'm still stumbling in the dark" Dropping his head to rest against Levi's, Eren nodded. His lover's voice strong, without a hint of his usual dreaminess, or a waver in his convictions. It was the pure strength that formed Eren's very soul "They say it's always darkest right before dawn. When the sun finally rises on that new day, everything is going to get better. You'll see. This will pass and we'll have our place in the sun"

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