#that was flawless perfect my favourite thing ever etc etc

[lily-blue-blue-lily]

4x12 episode of all time or something

[emeraldskulblaka]

Hm. I've chosen a difficult and controversial topic for my musings today, but given recent developments as well as the ask sitting in my inbox, I felt like I had to address it somehow even if I'm not entirely confident in my own stance on the topic, which is - "cancelling" celebrities, or more specifically, theatre actors, for their beliefs.

US elections in particular often lead to unexpected surprises, the most recent being Zachar* Lev* and N*cole Sch*rzinger as Tr*mp supporters, joining other former Broadway favourites like Laura O*nes and Carrie M*nolakos. This isn't a purely American phenomenon, of course, and also extends to the creators and producers. Cammack's transphobic remarks regarding Mary Poppins casting made headlines, and ALW's and Anton Kruglov's political affiliations are no secret.

Now what? Should everyone boycott their shows? Harrass them on social media and demand replacements? Never see any ALW musical ever again?

Personally, I find backlash important. The people in question should know that their actions have consequences - if they support someone trying to take away fundamental rights, healthcare etc from millions of people, they must be able to face a loss of support themselves, and the outrage by their former supporters. HOWEVER - that's usually not what I do. I'm more of a "quiet quitter". If I deem the accusations realistic enough or the evidence sufficient, I simply unfollow them and try to avoid them wherever possible. I stop talking about and recommending shows featuring them to others. I make peace with myself and look towards other performers instead, but if I am confronted with them, I try to focus on the character instead of the actor. After all, I liked their performance before their personality crept in, and it's not worth any less because of it. Ripley's Diana is phenomenal. K*lpakov's Caramon is interesting and emphatic. I won't throw a tantrum if I can't avoid them, but not having to see them at all would be ideal.

The problem is that this is feasible for performers, but not for creators and composers, and that's where it gets tricky. When I'm not forced to actually see the people in question, I catch myself ignoring the problems rather selfishly. The thing is, I'm not strong enough to swear off Cammack's shows. Les Mis, Phantom, Mary Poppins... yes, Weinstein produced Finding Neverland... damn, I certainly can't let go of Last Trial because of the composer. And what about Landestheater Linz using AI for all of their show artwork? I find it disgusting, but would I stop seeing show there if I lived nearby? Nope.

As I said, I haven't found a satisfactory way of dealing with it. But I find it very important to realise that nobody is morally perfect, and if you search long enough, you'll always find something disgusting to uncover. If you look for flaws everywhere, if what you watch has to match your worldview 100% all the time, there will be very little left for you to enjoy. Don't expect everyone and everything to be flawless until proven otherwise in the first place. Where your own tolerance ends is yours to decide, though.

For some artists (broad category), my tolerance has ended, and I recognise that I am still engaging with shows others would deem impossible to watch, heck, I'm well aware that my interest in Russian shows is seen as a taboo by many, but do not be fooled into thinking that I'm supporting everything uncritically and everything I post should be seen as an endorsement. Absolutely not the case. I'm not naive.

I'm at the end of my post and don't really remember where I meant to go when I started writing it, but tl&dr, Emerald is aware of goings-on in the theatre world and capable of engaging with things critically.

[pink-lemonadefairy]

Hi i forgot to put the 🐙 emoji in my last anon LOL but it’s 🐙!!! (Not sure if u do emoji anons on this acct :p) my favourite classics are honestly ANYTHING by kafka. I am a kafka girl. I love kafka. And then jane austen!! Pride and prejudice 💋💋mr. darcy is the only man ever actually i love when they’re QUIET (emphasis)

I’m pretty open to honestly most classic literature, i’ve been wanting to get some recommendations that aren’t the same authors. Sylvia plath unfortunately doesn’t really do it for me because I’m probably not her target audience but some of her poems/proses are good! I’m currently reading dracula/frankenstein (at the same time lol) and have been loving it so far. The only con about frankenstein is that i bought a tinier version so the words are huddled together and although my ass CAN read it i’d rather the words to be spaced out :-( not sure if it’s a me thing… i’ll just finish the book and see if i would get another version of frankenstein hehe

i also have a little life on hand rn, that is the book I’m especially putting on hold because from what i’ve seen people were Not okay when reading it. Idk about me tho personally i’m not an outwardly emotional person but i’m not heartless so i’ll read it when i can…

I have SOOO many books on my TBR list but i’ve been putting them on hold because i still have a number of books at home that i need to finish…! I wish i could show u a photo because it’s on my notes app lol. This might be a very unpopular opinion but i enjoyed reading murakami’s killing commendatore even though his descriptions of women r nasty. I read his books in a more factual (?) way? If that makes sense. If you have any book/author recommendations do tell me!! Especially female authors 🐙🤍

hi my love 💛 i’m so sorry for the late response :(

omg kafka!! 🥺 i haven’t read any of his works in full yet but i’ve read snippets on pinterest and they’re so so beautiful :( i love the way he writes. do you have any favourite works of his? :O oooh yes pride & prejudice!! the most classic of the classics i feel like lol. YES EXACTLY LOL, men when they’re quiet and don’t talk > 😌

i haven’t read any sylvia plath and tbh i’m not sure if i’d ever pick any of her works up because i’ve lots of bad things about them :( i’m glad you’re enjoying those books though!! :D frankenstein is really great!! >< i think they’re making a live action of it (?) which i’m super excited for !! and ik this isn’t dracula lol but i’m soooooo losing my mind over the new nosferatu movie coming out rahhhh!! it looks amazing :P I TOTALLY GET YOU!! the frankenstein i read in hs was similar and it was seriously a pain to get thru ��� like why are the letters and words so close together 💔

oh god yeah a little life … ive heard it’s so heartbreaking :( i dont think i’ll be reading it anytime soon lol life is sad enough!! 😞 but people say it’s v well written ! good luck if you ever do get around to reading it 😭💗

ME TOO HELP ☹️ i love buying books but then my tbr just grows and grows and then i don’t even wanna read anymore rip. i definitely know what you mean dw! >< i think something a lot of people tend to forget is that we can (and are supposed to) be critical of authors works, esp those from back in the day! i think the problem is when it’s marketed as something it’s not & people say a work is flawless and perfect when it’s like…not, and even hurts groups of people, etc etc. idk if that makes sense lol but yeah! 😭

hmmm off the top of my head, since you like classics i’m thinking of virginia woolf, toni morrison, and maya angelou! for woolf, i read mrs dalloway (which i LOVED) and a room of ones own for a school assignment. i def recommend those! and for morrison, i read song of solomon which i also really, really loved. beloved by her is also on my list! for maya angelou id definitely recommend and still i rise and letter to my daughter <3 her poems are beautiful too!

i mostly read fiction / fantasy at the moment 😭 if you’re interested in those genres i can give you recs as well ><

[sargeant-bxrnes]

fezco | nsfw alphabet

࿐ ˚ . ✦ warning(s): definitely +18. this one is nasty. [my english is a warning on its own, as always]

requested: yes !! thank you anons ;)

my masterlist!

my requests are open

A = Aftercare (What they're like after sex)

Fez is the GOD of aftercare. He is so sweet, no matter what. If you want a bath, he'll get it ready for you, if you wanna eat, he'll order something and take it to you, so you don't have to move.

If all you want are cuddles, then he's down for it. He really loves to hold you in between his arms, caressing your skin and whispering how good you were and how much he loves you.

If he didn’t love the sex so much, aftercare would probably be his favorite part.

B = Body part (Their favourite body part of theirs and also their partner's)

Ask him this and it will legit take him hours to answer. Fez wouldn't be able to choose just one thing about you because in his eyes you're flawless. Utterly gorgeous. He loves all of you.

His favorite part of himself... he'd have to say his hands. They bring you so much pleasure, and he uses them to keep you safe. It sounds odd, but it makes perfect sense to him.

C = Cum (Anything to do with cum basically... I'm a disgusting person)

He is pretty responsible, let's state that. He knows that getting you pregnant is literally the last thing you two need at the moment, so normally he'd use a condom.

And even if you happen to be in the pill, he doesn't like to take much risks, he may cum inside you once or twice, but most of the time he does it on your chest, your thighs, your back, or your mouth. It’s hotter that way.

D = Dirty Secret (Pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

Since you two are really secretive about your affairs, he can't help but wonder how thrilling it would be to fuck in a place where you can get caught.

He’ll never admit that, though, he respects you too much to put you out in the open like that.

E = Experience (How experienced are they? Do they know what they're doing?)

Fez hasn't really had the time to go fucking around and having lots of sex, but he knows enough to have you moaning his name.

Still, he's a quick learner, it didn't take him long to pick up on what you liked and get really good on it.

Like really, really good at it. Fez has positively ruined you for other men.

F = Favourite Position (This goes without saying)

Any position that lets him look at your face while he fucks you, it feels more intimate, and yes, it does wonders for his dick to see your eyes rolling to the back of your head while he thrusts into you.

G = Goofy (Are they more serious in the moment, or are they humorous, etc)

Fezco being Fezco will definitely say a funny thing or two, but wouldn't turn the whole thing into a joke though. He likes the intimacy of it, it's very important for him.

H = Hair (How well groomed are they, does the carpet match the drapes, etc.)

Being honest, he doesn't really care. He'll trim it just so it won't bother you.

He has no problem with body hair. It's natural. He likes natural. So all it matters to him is that you’re comfortable.

I = Intimacy (How are they during the moment, romantic aspect...)

Your lives can be pretty hectic at times, so when you are having sex is one of the few moments where you two are completely alone and able to enjoy each other's company. So it is a pretty big deal to both.

He's not sweet to the point you cringe, but he is sweet enough to have you blushing the entire time.

J = Jack Off (Masturbation headcanon)

He's never had much time to do it. Before he met you he did it to blow off some steam and relax after a long day.

He doesn't do it so often now that he's with you, he knows that if he's ever in the mood, you'll welcome him with open arms. Or legs, for that matter.

K = Kink (One or more of their kinks)

Fez is kinky, but not too much, y’know? He doesn't consider himself a freak, but he does have some kinks he's afraid to voice in case you get too freaked out.

He's into praise, both giving and receiving. It makes him feel even better when he knows you like what he's doing to you.

And on a more... kinky side, he's slightly into overstimulation or orgasm denial, having complete control of your pleasure drives him crazy. Marking your body with hickeys, also a bit of bondage, but that one is reserved for when you've been teasing him for too long.

And for sure, he can really turn into a teasing bastard when he combines bondage with orgasm denial, to then switch to overstimulation.

L = Location (Favourite places to do the do)

No matter what, his bedroom or yours will always be god tier to him, nothing compares to the comfort and privacy you have there; it allows him to truly do whatever he wants to you, to not hold back.

But if the urge presents, he's willing to fuck in other places too, like his car, a bathroom during a party, an empty room in the store if things are really heated. May Ash forgive him.

M = Motivation (What turns them on, gets them going)

It's not hard to turn Fez on. It goes from little things like biting your lip, to doing a whole show, like striptease.

Simple things get him going, like knowing you want him as badly as he does. Seeing you wearing his clothes.

Also, knee socks really do it for him, especially when you’re wearing nothing but his shirt and a pair of knee socks.

But truth? The one thing that will make him give in no matter the situation, is neck kisses. Fez lives for neck kisses, those are his kryptonite.

N = NO (Something they wouldn't do, turn offs)

Sharing. He really, really doesn't like to share, especially not you. It doesn't matter if it's a man or a woman, the answer is still no. You’re all his, he’s all yours. That’s the end of it.

O = Oral (Preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc)

Fez loves to receive, but more than anything he loves to give. He's simply a giver and that's it.

If it were up to him, he'd spent the rest of his life between your thighs, making you cum again, and again, and again, until all that leaves your mouth is his name.

P = Pace (Are they fast and rough? Slow and sensual? etc.)

It depends a lot of the mood and the type of sex.

If he's making love to you, then he'd be slow and deep, whispering softly how much he loves you and how good you make him feel, caressing your skin.

If it's jealous/angry sex, then he'd be rough most of the time, pounding you to the mattress or whatever surface you're on, while reminding you you're his and his only, marking your body with little love bites and hickeys.

Q = Quickie (Their opinions on quickies rather than proper sex, how often, etc.)

He'd rather have his time with you to do things right, but if the opportunity presents, Fez will never turn down a quickie. At least not when it's on a decent moment.

R = Risk (Are they game to experiment, do they take risks, etc.)

He's willing to experiment as long as you're not at risk, if it involves harming you, he's not really down for it unless you promise you're completely okay with it.

And yeah, for you, he's willing to experiment. Who knows? Maybe you'll discover new kinks together.

S = Stamina (How many rounds can they go for, how long do they last...)

Fez will last for two rounds, three when he's feeling restless. But do not worry, those two rounds will last a loooong time, rest assured, you'll be completely worn out & satisfied by the time he's done with you.

T = Toy (Do they own toys? Do they use them? On a partner or themselves?)

He doesn't own any, but if you do, then he'd be down to use them only with the purpose of teasing the life out of you, but he'd never, ever let you cum because of them.

He'd tease you until you're begging for release, and he'd help you finish by burying himself deep inside you and finishing the job himself.

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)

As calm and innocent as Fez looks, he can be such a teasing little shit. He knows exactly what to say, where to touch you and what to do to get you turned on. And all while pretending to be oblivious to what he's doing to you.

If you're into that, then he can tease you until your begging for him to fuck you senseless.

V = Volume (How loud they are, what sounds they make)

He's not loud. But he'd whisper things in your ear, whether it's praise or dirty talk, and would often let out a groan.

W = Wild Card (Get a random headcanon for the character of your choice)

Fezco has like... the dirtiest mouth ever. The first time he talked dirty to you, you genuinely let out a gasp, getting caught off guard.

And ever since that moment, Fez knew dirty talk got you going, and oh boy, doesn’t he enjoy making you blush and wet your panties left and right.

X = X-Ray (Let's see what's going on in those pants, picture or words)

He's a good 7.5 inches, which is really impressive. He doesn't really like to brag about it though, he's the type of guy that only smirks when asked.

Y = Yearning (How high is their sex drive?)

It's pretty high, there's no point in lying. There's days where he wakes up and the only thing he can think about is fucking you.

And even on normal days, the thought of having sex with you is on his mind at all times. After all, he's still young and his hormones are all over the place.

Z = ZZZ (... how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)

He never falls asleep before you do, he wants to make sure you're comfortable and happy before sleeping, and mostly, watching you asleep in between his arms—most of the times with your head against his chest—, is what eventually lulls him to sleep.

[just-a-little-cellist]

Jorah Mormont - NSFW Alphabet

A/N: jorah mormont is the love of my life and its a disgrace that there isn't more content for him, so i made some :) requests are still open

nsfw under the cut :P enjoy!

A - Aftercare (what are they like after sex)

King of aftercare. He is always careful to check you're alright and that he didn't hurt you at all. You might have to verbally reassure him that you enjoyed it, since on occasion he gets anxious, but after that he's more than content to cuddle with you for as long as you want.

B - Body part (fav body part of themselves/their partner)

There isn't really a specific part of himself that he prefers, and the insecurity that came after his greyscale certainly didn't help, but he would probably say his build in general. He's gained of lot of strength and is rather proud of it.

Jorah thinks that all of you is flawless, although his favourite part of you is your smile. He thinks it's the most beautiful thing he's ever seen and when it's directed at him it makes his heart melt.

C - Cum (where do they prefer to cum?)

His favourite place to cum is inside you. It feels so intimate and he doesn't want to degrade you by finishing anywhere else on you.

D - Dirty secret (self-explanatory)

He isn't the best at it himself, but hearing you dirty talk is one of his biggest turn ons. Especially if you whisper things to him in public, it always causes him to flush bright red.

E - Experience (how experienced are they?)

He's had enough experience that he knows what he's doing, but he is generally a little more reserved than most with who he sleeps with.

F - Favourite position (goes without saying)

Cowgirl. Jorah likes to be able to admire all of you - looking up at you while you ride him makes you look like a goddess in his eyes. It also lets him feel vulnerable sometimes, and when you start riding him his brain just shuts off.

G - Goofy (are they goofy or serious in the moment?)

He tends to be more serious during sex, preferring to be immersed in the moment with you.

H - Hair (opinions on grooming etc.)

He doesn't fuss too much over his hair, but if you ask then he's willing to do something with it.

I - Intimacy (how intimate are they during sex?)

Intimacy is incredibly important to Jorah. Sex is the perfect time for him to express just how much he cares for you, and he pours all his unsaid emotions into his actions.

J - Jack off (masturbation headcanon)

He doesn't do it very often, only every now and then if he's away from you. He prefers to relieve his urges with you when possible.

K - Kinks (again, pretty self-explanatory)

I feel like Jorah is usually pretty vanilla, but I do headcanon him as a service sub. He enjoys it when you aren't afraid to take control and be dominant, and he is more than happy to do as you tell him. However, if I had to pick a specific kink, I think he would have a praise kink. Being told that he's doing a good job is reassuring and he makes the prettiest sounds when you compliment him in bed.

L - Location (favourite place to do the deed)

Again, he's pretty tame so his go-to is just the bed, although he's not above fucking you in the bath after a long day.

M - Motivation (what gets them going)

One thing that really gets him going is seeing your feisty side. He likes watching you stand up for yourself and not take shit from anyone else - it really speaks to his sub side. Another thing that I've mentioned already is dirty talk. Hearing you say such vulgar things will instantly get him in the mood.

N - No (something they'd never do)

Jorah refuses to do anything to hurt you, regardless of how badly you want it (this includes CNC). He can be coaxed into being rougher sometimes but he hates the idea of harming you in any way.

O - Oral (preference in giving, receiving etc.)

This man is undoubtedly, 100% a giver. He's surprisingly talented at oral and, every time you sleep together, he makes sure you finish on his tongue at least once before you fuck.

P - Pace (are they fast, slow, quick, rough?)

Jorah likes to take his time in making sure you're properly satisfied (service sub) so he tends to go slower and prefers to treat you gently, but if you want then he's happy to change the pace to suit you better.

Q - Quickie (opinion on quickies)

He's not a huge fan of them. He wants to be able to take things slow, at least most of the time.

R - Risk (how open are they to risk?)

If there's ever anything remotely risky you'd want to do, you'd have to be the one to suggest it. Jorah is open to most things but would never initiate anything new in case you didn't like it.

S - Stamina (how long can they go for?)

He's fairly average in terms of stamina, and might go for a couple of rounds on a good day, but will more than make up for it with how many times he'll make you finish.

T - Toy (opinion on using toys etc.)

He would rather pleasure you himself rather than using toys on you, but he does like the idea of watching you use toys on yourself.

U - Unfair (how much do they like to tease?)

In the bedroom, he doesn't tease at all and just tries to make you cum as much as possible. However on days he's feeling particularly flirty, he'll do subtle things in public that he knows will rile you up.

V - Volume (are they loud or quiet?)

It depends on the day. Usually Jorah is rather quiet in bed, more focused on the sounds you make, but if he's in a subby headspace he'll be a bit louder.

W - Wild card (random headcanon)

One day, while the two of you were in town, you got needy and pulled him into an alleyway to give him a blowjob. Now whenever he walks past an alleyway he gets reminded of the memory and blushes uncontrollably.

X - X-ray (what's going on... down there?)

He's a little on the thinner side, and an inch or so above average in length.

Y - Yearning (how high is their sex drive?)

He has a moderate sex drive, but can be very easily swayed if you're in the mood.

Z - Zzzzz... (how quickly do they fall asleep after?)

Jorah always, without fail, will wait until you've drifted off before he goes to sleep. It gives him peace of mind to ensure you're safe and protected beforehand.

[violent-optimism]

The Problem with Modern Movie-Goers (and what needs to change)

Hello and welcome to something I’ve been meaning to write for a VERY long time.

Honestly, I don’t think I ever could have written this until now because I hadn’t gathered all the necessary thoughts yet.

Let’s just get straight into it because I have a lot to say and a lot of ground to cover.

When you hear the phrase “toxic fanbase”, what do you usually think of? Racism? Misogyny? Homophobia? Unfortunately, these traits are all too common even in spaces that are deemed “safe” by most. And while these problems are very serious and important to address, it’s actually not the main issue I’m going to focus on today.

When I write about fanbase toxicity, I’m going to be referring to something that isn’t talked about nearly as much, but I believe is equally deserving of attention. Let’s talk about people critiquing movies.

More specifically, let’s talk about people who give negative criticism about movies. Right off the bat, just to be perfectly clear…let me say that there is absolutely nothing wrong with disliking a film. Everyone has different tastes, preferences, etc. If you didn’t enjoy a piece of media, there is absolutely nothing wrong with that. It would be a pretty boring world if we all loved and hated the same things, right?

What I have a problem with, is the insanely negative, overly-critical and fun-sucking way that people talk about movies these days. I’m not going to name any movies or franchises specifically, but I definitely have a few in mind when it comes to this subject and I suspect you do as well.

Not so long ago, it felt like whenever a movie came out that was generally considered “poor” or “not that good”, everyone would quietly and reasonably give their opinions and that would be that. Nowadays, not only are people EXTREMELY unkind about their opinions towards a film, but it’s like they purposely try to look for things in a movie to get mad about. There’s this intense bandwagon mentality that is usually divided into three different groups that are not mutually exclusive:

1)     People who hate something just because it’s popular

2)     People who hate something just because it’s a sequel/prequel/remake

3)     People who hate something because it was made by a specific company/studio

 And even if the film itself is generally considered to be good, “fans” will take it personally if the movie did not do everything exactly “right” or the way they wanted it. We’ve gotten to the point in film critique where it honestly feels like people are searching for the bad, not the good.

This leads me to my other big point: satisfaction. These days it feels like it is IMPOSSIBLE for anyone to be satisfied by a film anymore. The script has to be 100% perfect with zero plot holes. The CGI has to be flawless. All the actors have to be “wholesome” and “unproblematic”. Female characters have to be strong but not TOO strong or else people will complain that they’re overpowered Mary Sues. The list goes on…

It's like people aren’t even looking for entertainment anymore, they’re looking for something to be mad about. The conversation around all modern film has turned into a massive cesspool of people arguing over whose opinion is more “right” and why someone’s favourite film is garbage and needs to be cancelled or retconned. There’s no middle ground, no compromise, no room for someone to just stop and think for one SECOND, that what they’re saying about a movie might be hurtful for somebody else.

Even though movies are fictional, even though they’re “just entertainment”, it can feel pretty awful to hear someone rip your favourite film apart and talk about how bad it is. I really wish more people considered that before expressing their opinion. Again, this isn’t to say that everyone has to like the same thing. This is not about someone disliking a movie…it’s about the way they tell people how much they dislike it.

I also think that the line between “fact” and “opinion”, in film is starting to become more and more blurred. You hear so many people say things like: “That film is garbage”, in comparison to “In my opinion, that film is garbage.” See how such a subtle change makes such a difference? The second one feels more personal, more empathetic, like the person is taking responsibility for their opinion and recognizing that not everyone else feels the same; instead of just assuming that everyone does.

I feel like movie goers can’t just enjoy something for what it is anymore. Not only does a film have to be perfect, but if it’s not, people will go on…and on…and on about the things that the filmmakers should have done instead. I don’t know about you, but I sure am sick of hearing “They shouldn’t have done it that way. It would have been a lot better if they had done X instead.”

I don’t even get why people bring this up in the first place, because it’s not like any of us have the power to make these changes even if we wanted to. I think the only true example of this taking place would be with the “Sonic” movie that came out a few years ago, but that was a trailer, not the final product. Since when do people remake a film because it got bad reviews?

I get that it can be kind of fun to fantasize about the different ways a story can go; and that it can also be a little disappointing when things don’t happen the way you want them to. I totally understand that. What gets me the most is that we live in a moviegoing society where now: suddenly everyone thinks they’re Siskel and Ebert. Suddenly, everyone thinks they know what is best for a movie or a franchise. Suddenly, we have people who think they could do a better job than the directors, writers and hundreds of other people who make up a film set and get PAID to do it.

The arrogance of this thinking just makes my blood boil, and it also feels like a huge slap in the face to all the hard-working, creative people who poured their heart and soul into a piece of media. It might be easy for us to lean back, scoff and say “Wow, they put zero effort into this”, when we’re basing our opinions purely on the finished product and nothing else. We truly don’t know just how much time and hard work was required during the shoot.  Don’t tell me for one second that you could do better when you have NO idea what was actually required of these people behind the scenes.

Making movies is HARD, ya’ll.

Expressing your opinion about a film is starting to become a super vulnerable and scary experience. You never know what the other person is going to say or what is going to turn into a heated, childish argument. If you dare to say something good about a film that is (supposedly) universally hated, the masses will make you regret it so quick and so hard that you will never want to speak your mind about a movie ever again. The same thing works the other way around too, with people speaking negatively about films that are considered legends or classics. Basically, if your way of thinking goes against the majority, you’ll be flayed alive by a hoard of “fans” who will call you all sorts of horrible things. Gee, isn’t film great?

I thought movies were supposed to be about escapism and entertainment, not about proving who is right and who is wrong. Is it not enough for a movie to simply transport you to a different time and place for a couple hours? Is it not enough to see epic battles, fantastical locations and the triumph of good over evil? Why are all of our favourite franchises on such a high pedestal? Why have we given ourselves such grand expectations that are virtually impossible for any film maker to actually meet?

And why is it so hard for people to just sit back, relax and enjoy the ride? I know that for myself personally, movies are way more fun when I accept what’s going on, instead of getting irrationally angry that the filmmakers didn’t show exactly what I wanted to happen. They’re not mind readers, guys! Show me someone who could make a movie that would please millions of fans in exactly the right way that makes everyone happy. (Spoiler alert: they don’t exist).

It's hard to compare to how things were before social media. I wasn’t alive during the 80s, 70s or earlier, but I think I can safely say that the internet has definitely not helped this giant wave of negativity in fanbases. Everyone can safely hide behind a screen and say whatever they want about a movie, regardless of how true it is or how it affects other people. If we were to all take the screens away and have a simple, in-person discussion about movies, I can’t help but wonder if it would take a more positive (or at least more civil) route.

So what’s the big takeaway here? Basically, I think there needs to be a huge paradigm shift in the way general audiences and fans watch movies. I broke down a lot for you here and I think I only scratched the surface about this issue; but I think I can offer a solution with just one short formula:

Step One: You watch a film

Step Two: If you liked it, great! If not, respectfully move on and don’t ruin it for the people who did

Doesn’t that sound so easy? If only it actually were that simple and more people followed it. I wish more people talked about movies they loved, instead of bashing on ones they hate. I don’t mean to brag, but you don’t see me purposely looking up Youtube videos of films I dislike and commenting about it. I might not enjoy a certain film or series but you don’t see me going online spewing hate and ruining it for the people that do.

Life is honestly too short for that. I want people to tell me how inspired and passionate they are about a film. I want to see people’s eyes light up as they talk to me about why they think it’s the greatest movie of all time. That is way more interesting to me than any negative, cynical string of words will ever be.

I know a lot of this has probably preachy and like I’m on a bit of a high horse. You know what? I don’t care, I wanted to say it and I should say it. I want movie conversations to be enjoyable again. I should be able to say an opinion about a film without getting verbally attacked for it. I want people to just stop and think for a second before they speak and to realize that at the end of the day it’s just a movie and there is NO reason to put someone down just because they think differently.

Just be kind, ya’ll. That’s really what this is about.

 Thanks for reading.

[starlingflight]

Hi! I found your work a few days ago through @read-a-hinny-fic and I’ve already read all your fics!

The way you capture Harry and Ginny’s personalities is absolutely incredible, as well as their interactions with each other. Their constant banter full of sarcasm is beautifully written, and even the more sentimental or serious moments feel true to canon (I often think that those are over the top in some fics, which makes Harry and Ginny seem a bit OOC). Another thing I absolutely love is that there’s never an awkward moment between them, everything is easy and simple (like after their first kiss in the common room, they just keep flirting and messing around) 💙.

Also, your representation of Ginny and Ron’s relationship feels painfully accurate, not being able to resist winding up each other, but still caring a great deal about them (even if they’d never admit it). Other characters’ portrayals are flawless too: Hermione being a good friend (trying to help Harry and Ginny get together without meddling too much, offering some insight during the siblings’ arguments…) yet responsible and bossy like usual; Neville’s shyness opposed to his determination and bravery depending on the moment; the classic and characteristic humour of the twins; etc. I feel like you did a great job with Dean specifically, because there was no bashing implied even though he did make attempts to get back together with Ginny. He was still the good guy we see in canon that for some reason people choose to depict as the devil 🤷🏼‍♀️. The same goes for Cho, although she isn’t mentioned that much. On top of that, I think the Weasleys’ reactions (plus Muriel) were completely right, there wasn’t the typical older brother talk or anything like that, and their POVs were perfect (you could tell whose it was just by the way they talked).

By the way, I adore your references to your other works, it makes the timeline clearer and it’s like it completes them even more. And I’m not a native English speaker but I thought Hagrid and Fleur’s accents were fine.

I know I probably should have just left a comment in ao3, but I wanted to drop by to tell you how amazing your writing is and to thank you for brightening up my time while going through Covid. I’ll definitely be reading those WIPs you mentioned when you post them!! I know it’s a bit of a topic, but if you could write something of Ginny’s 6th year or the summer after the Battle it’d be awesome, I’d love to see your take on those. Anyway, sorry for the essay I just sent you 😹 and sorry if there are any major mistakes on my English too.

Oh my goodness! Thank you so, so much. Seriously, you have no idea how happy this just made me!

Writing Harry and Ginny's banter is my favourite, I'm really glad you enjoy it too! I have so many dramatic ideas that I have to scrap because to make them happen either Harry or Ginny would have to behave OOC (bit off topic, but I realised that's why I love @floreatcastellumposts work so much, just reading her stuff taught me that less is most definitely more sometimes and that is why my Weasley's reaction fic doesn't have anyone reacting in a particularly dramatic way when they find out about Hinny).

It gives me so much relief when people tell me they like my version of Ron and Ginny's relationship. I have no siblings so I sometimes feel slightly out of my depth. Fortunately, my husband has loads so I just study how they all interact with each other haha.

I don't know if this is unpopular or not but I actually have a lot of sympathy for Dean. He and Ginny are together for 6+ months and that's a long time when you're a teenager. I don't doubt that it was difficult for him to watch Harry and Ginny together.

I feel bad for Cho too. The girl needs a therapist , not a boyfriend!

Thank you for the reassurance on Fleur and Hagrid's accents, they are hands down the things I find most difficult to write!

I genuinely cannot help tying everything together. I'm just writing down all my headcanons and hoping that someone else enjoys them!

I have the first five chapters of DH from Ginny's POV written but it's stalled a little bit. I also have a lot of post-battle stuff that I think I'm going to post as a series of one-shots that follow each other chronologically, so you shall get your wish soon!

I'm so glad my fics brightened up your covid nightmare! Seriously, just knowing that I've made someone else happy makes me happy!

Your English is amazing! Please don't ever apologise for any mistakes you make in a second language (not that I noticed any). You know multiple languages! That is so impressive!!

Lastly, I just wanted to say thank you again for taking the time to write this. I go back and read comments like this when I'm having writers block/anxiety and they help me snap out of it, so I really appreciate it 🥰

[purgatoriorpg]

admin c-senpai, please, if it’s not a bother, can you please give us some writing tips? you’re so talented, I’m literally shocked, no joke, your writing is flawless!!!! The aesthetic??? On point

Anon, this is so lovely of you to say. Thank you!! It depends on what kind of writing you’re talking about as I find depending on the format or purpose, your approach and style can change dramatically to suit those needs. But in general, here are some things off the top of my head that have helped me over the years:

PRACTICE: I hate the cliche of this but truly practice makes perfect. I’ve been writing or roleplaying in some shape or form for 10+ years. No matter how long or short the writing was, or how objectively “good” or well thought-out, everything I’ve ever written has helped me become a better writer. Writing is a craft and a skill, the more you do it, the more you’ll grow and learn how to be even better. Write badly, begin with self-forgiveness.

VOCABULARY: I don’t know if this is still considered a taboo anywhere? but I write with Google Thesaurus always open. Not because I deliberately want to write ‘purple prose’ or sound more elevated but because my short-term memory doesn’t always contain all the vocabulary that I actually know and sometimes you need a different / unique / more interesting word to articulate what you want to say in a sentence. I love finding more interesting ways to phrase a particular sentence — especially if it adds dynamism or rhythm to the sentence / imagery / moment. I also used to keep a list of favourite words / phrases that I would refer to for inspiration, collect your own favourite words and sprinkle them in your writing for flavour. 

VARIATION: One of the easiest ways to make your writing more interesting and readable is to vary your sentence structure and style. Each sentence has a rhythm and sense of beat — if you were to read it out loud, what would it sound like? Using longer words, longer phrases and clauses will lengthen the feeling and emotion whereas shorter, sharper sentences and simpler words will strike closer to the heart. The best examples of this are where poets and authors will drop in a short punchy three or four word sentence (or even just a single word) to punctuate a verse or paragraph. It’s where they put emphasis. Use structure to build momentum and atmosphere, and also to hit hard and fast when you need it to. 

REFERENCES: Everything I’ve ever written has been full of references to all my favourite things — mythology, divinity and biblical lore, classic literature, etc. It’s also an easy way to craft metaphors and imagery that immediately create associations in your audience’s mind. This is basically where having a place where you collect your inspirations and favourite quotes comes in handy. Also Pinterest boards, Spotify playlists, etc. 

STRUCTURE: This depends on what you’re writing but even in roleplay where things are spontaneous and unplotted, I always try to go into a thread with a rough idea of what I want my character to have said / felt / done by the end of the interaction. It might be down to my Capricorn Moon but I love structure, I love having things plotted and planned down to the very last detail. Roleplay interactions don’t fit perfectly into this formula because you want to use your chemistry with your partner and let your characters’ imaginations run wild, but you can have an idea of the ‘end goal’ of the thread, i.e. the point that you need to arrive at by the end. I approach all roleplay ideas with this question: “What needs to happen at the end of this event / scene / thread?” So even if you don’t know what exactly will happen, you know what the end point is and how you get there will just unravel organically in real-time writing.

IMAGERY: Imagery is probably the thing I’ve spent the most time unconsciously perfecting and refining throughout my time writing and roleplaying. Every character I write has a specific aesthetic and set of references I’ll call on and repeatedly use throughout their writing, e.g. an actor or dramatic character — Shakespeare, plays & theatre, tragedy; the head of a crime syndicate — war, blood, divine violence, biblical references; a young prince — the Trojan War, Greek mythology, sun imagery; a doctor — surgery & death, the Reaper, flowers & immortality. This is one of the ways I paint a specific image and vibe for my characters that translates through to everything I write — metaphors / similes / analogies / everything that goes into a response becomes infused with those particular references and aesthetics. I also really like using specific occupations, disciplines or hobbies to explore a character’s mindset and terminology e.g. science, engineering, music, medicine, astronomy, art. A musically inclined character doesn’t merely pause, they’re resting between beats, their silences are interludes, or a conductor’s wand hovering in the air before the next movement, their movements are a violin bow singing through the air, their laughter is a cadenza, their grief is an elegy or a requiem. You can do the same with literally everything — scientists that are obsessed with the stars, or death, or immortality, or nature; engineers that approach everything like a schematic, a problem to be solved or deconstructed. Your character’s worldview frames the unique language you can use and the way you describe them.

MOTIVATION: My final bit of advice is probably something I’ve arrived at and become clearer about in more recent years, which is, understanding your character’s root motivations. To write a really compelling and interesting character, you need to know what drives them and what makes them tick. This is why in the application for this roleplay, the first thing I ask is the Impetus. What would your character kill for? What would they die for? Push them to the extreme, and dig deep into what their core is. When you know this, it informs everything you write about that character. They have purpose, they have a reason to do XYZ. Every character in a story needs purpose to be interesting, otherwise they’re just floating around without meaning. Even characters that lack purpose want something, and that something should shape their actions and development. Ultimately, knowing what your character wants outlines their ‘plot arc’ in your story or roleplay. Their goal is what they will achieve at the end. They will experience obstacles, develop / progress / regress, and encounter allies / antagonists on their journey to achieve this goal. Whether you love or hate a character, someone with a strongly defined purpose and motivation will always capture people’s attention.

[sixofyeet]

Spoilers for shadow and bone

Finished watching shadow and bone yesterday! Tried watching it as slow as I could but all good things must come to an end unfortunately :P

Here are my thoughts in no particular sequence:

The scenes were STUNNING. Was a bit apprehensive about how the whole thing would *look* ngl but very rich, very aesthetically pleasing. Even if the show on it's own was bad I'd still watch it for the gorgeous scenery.

Right off the bat I'm going to say that they did NOT cut corners with the casting. They are *chef's kiss* perfect. The crows were PERFECT. Freddy, Kit and Amita had great chemistry.

Though some people feel that Kaz wasn't ruthless enough... I actually don't mind it because again, he's in a whole different setting and not in ketterdam where he obviously has more infuence and power. Also the fact that this takes before the events of soc so I don't find it *that* unusual. That doesn't mean Kaz was ooc! The bits and intricacies of his character that make Kaz... Kaz, was shown subtly through the show in his decision making, planning etc (HOW HE FIGURED OUT THE CONDUCTER WAS PLANNING TO ASSASSINATE ALINA IS A PRIME EXAMPLE)

Inej and her knives and all the action sequences 😭 her character was down to the BOOK.

And Jesper,,,,,, KIT YOUNG WAS BORN TO PLAY HIM. He oozes that Charm of our favourite sharpshooter on screen.

When I read shadow and bone I really didn't like any of the characters (hence I read only half of it a few years back) Alina is a lot more likeable and a LOT less bland in the show. Jessie brings this earnestness to Alina and I could actually feel something for her. She's got me loving Alina wtf😭 Show Mal is an absolute SWEETHEART. Book Mal again, I found bland (but this is an unpopular opinion everyone falls over their necks to defend book Mal). LOVE Archie Renaux's acting.

Ben Barnes does NOT disappoint as a villain. I love how he drops his facade and becomes the manipulative, obsessive antagonist later on. Flawless. Though I could have done without the backstory. (Can we STOP humanising villains?)

But what REALLY surprised me was the part I had least expectations from: Nina and Matthias. Danielle and Calahan have done an AMAZING job. I could feel their energy bouncing off each other. A++ chemistry. I have never, ever cared for helnik but oh my god.

And even individually they haven't done any less. Danielle is the PERFECT Nina. All my doubts about that are gone.

They take the crown, hands down even with the few scenes they had.

Also Alina's powers looked so BEAUTIFUL in the later episodes?

The costumes were gorgeous and on point. Great job with the keftas

Also the darkling's twink fur coat. I want one

Ooo also they did a good job intertwining both s&b and the crows' subplot.

A++ worldbuilding too.

For a first timer there might be a bit of an adjustment in the first episode I feel.

I think that's everything?

Overall it lived up to my expectations and more. Totally worth the wait and I'm just WAITING for season 2 to be announced already!

[takirasu]

twitter itself is a hellfire, but have you ever witnessed the Persona fandom, or 5's in particular, on there? Insanity.

People like and people dislike things. A famous game is open for a lot of love; and with a lot of love comes a lot of hate, as well. Something I finally noticed on this hell place was that people liking and those disliking Persona 5 simply can't coexist - and the hypocrisy is to the roof. I do not want to put people on the spot and usually keep my blog very positive, so I will not be adding screenshots and engage in individuals getting attacked,

but I do find it hilarious how the people on the I dislike or even hate P5 side constantly voice their opinions and back it up with "We should be able to say that we dislike something" while as soon as someone says "Oh I kinda liked P5 though" you're being called stupid or SMTelist somehow found your account and tell you to play a real game and how Persona came from SMT etc etc.

People should voice their opinions. Nothing is flawless, nothing is perfect and no I do not give a fuck if, to you, my favourite game is the worst thing this earth hae ever graced. What I do give a fuck about is the hypocrisy of me literally seeing negative tweets about the thing I love the most every. single. day. and muting them, but as soon as you bite back once there's 5 12-year olds stomping your back and literally ganging up on you until all you can do is block everyone, be called a coward, but live in peace - and the cycle continues.

TLDR: Let people enjoy things thanks for reading.

[woodchoc-magnum]

L0ne St@r 2x12 Hate Watch

DO NOT REBLOG THIS ONE - thanks, I’m trying to fly under the radar with my negative opinions here

Usual disclaimer, and I mean it this time: If you watch and love this show, that’s great and I hope you continue to enjoy it. Please don’t read this - simply go about having a lovely day.

If you do love this show and T*rlos and are braving this anyway - do not come in here. I mean it. This is not a T*rlos friendly zone. I do not ship it. Please enjoy your ship in peace and harmony. I have no intention of getting into arguments with anyone, I will simply ignore you.

I have done everything I can to avoid this showing up in the tags, whatever the LS tags are. Don’t send me hate on anon because I’ll delete them; I don’t care if you think I should stop watching the show, I’m not gonna. I like to suffer.

Eddie Diaz for calm and strength and to centre ourselves:

Hate, as always, under the cut:

Let's do this fucking thing, I've heard bad things about this episode

And I already know I'm wrong about the arsonist which is ANNOYING but maybe also too obvious so that's okay, I also know who the arsonist is and all the main plot points but I’ve still got to watch it to really appreciate the subtle nuances of the episode:

Oooh Billy

I ship it

Billwen for the win

This show is so dumb

Billy is smarter than Owen, maybe he should be the captain of the 126

I miss his lightning scars though

He's TWO HOURS LATER FOR DINNER

TK is looking as bland as always

They seriously waited for two fucking hours for this guy

Maybe should've put some deodorant on before going to dinner there Owen

You know I can't imagine the OG doing a storyline as dumb as this

So Carlos' dad thinks it's someone who works at the 126 or just a firefighter in general?

Well gosh darn it, it looks like Owen fits that profile exactly!

At least we get some Judd early in the episode and I love him

Angela Bassett is executive producer on this show as well? I hope she gets paid cash money for this

Billy is the red herring and I fell right into their trap

I just really wanted it to be him

Ooh Grace was listening

Oh it's 100% the arson investigator and Billy is 100% turning Owen in, I love him

Billy is amazing

He's my favourite character on this show

I hope he's not working with Owen to get the arson investigator? I hope he's actually this devious

I want him to be THIS DEVIOUS

Why the fuck does Owen wear that hoodie everywhere

TK is now having a little bitch fit

"they can't do that, can they?" he asks in a monotone, his face blank and devoid of expression

TK's real real dumb

Oh ho ho is this the shoving scene

IT IS

God Ronen CANNOT ACT

Okay so while I think it is wildly unbelievable that they would send TK's boyfriend to tell him that his father had been arrested by HIS father – it seems like a conflict – I would like to say that Carlos is being calm and reasonable

And TK is acting like a little BITCH

This is escalating quickly

Oh TK you so dumb

THE SHOVING

Wow

FOUR TIMES

Wow

Your fave is problematic, yo

Carlos deserves better than this whiny little piece of shit

And now, an interlude while I rant:

Let's talk about how Eddie Diaz yelled at Buck once in a supermarket and the fandom has never forgotten it; how his character has been villainised despite everything else going on in the show at the time, for that one fucking scene – let's talk about all the fics where Eddie hits Buck, or punches him, or rapes him – because you know those fics exist – let's talk about the "Eddie is violent" narrative that parts of this fandom like to push because Eddie yelled at Buck, one time, once, in a supermarket

Totally ignoring the fact that at no point at all, in any other episode he’s been in, has he been violent towards Buck, at all - let’s talk about how the street fighting arc was out of character for Eddie, because he was struggling to cope and looking for an outlet - let’s talk about how Buck and Eddie moved past that whole storyline and strengthened their relationship; how they built a family together, how they’re a team and they have each other’s backs no matter what, and how, not once in the entire show, have they ever been violent towards each other or pushed each other around in anger - NOT ONCE.

And let's talk about this scene, where TK, ya boy, ya sweet tender boy, just shoved the man he says he loved four times, violently, in front of people at the firehouse.

I betcha any money he doesn’t get tarnished with the Eddie-Diaz-is-violent brush, because he can do no wrong. He’s the fan favourite, and this is totally glossed over by the end of the episode and nothing will ever be said about it ever again.

Because wow, you guys. Wow. If this was my ship, I’d be pissed.

Back to the hate watch:

And I know that whole fight is for nothing because I know the plot twist – I know that the dads are working together in order to reveal the real arsonist, the investigator – so they've basically turned their children, who are in a relationship, against each other?

Also why is Billy allowed to be watching the interview?

Goddamn do we really have to show the gruesome burn victim photos

I really want Billy to be devious by the way, and not in on the plan

Oh here comes TK, looking like the little bitch he is

God he's a fucking awful actor

This is the dumbest plotline ever

Equating OWEN STRAND WITH THOR? ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME?

BLASPHEMY

THOR IS THE GOD OF THUNDER

OWEN IS A DUMBASS

THE TWO ARE NOT EQUAL

Uh oh here comes the evil investigator

Do either of these men – Owen and Carlos' dad – stop to consider that what they're doing has kind of an impact on their children, who are currently in a relationship? No? Okay

Because this is one hell of an awkward situation

Does Owen genuinely think that Billy is the arsonist?

Interesting that the arson investigator wants any info Owen didn't give Carlos' dad, and he turned off the cameras/mics etc

This show is stupid

Arson investigator also knows that the sons are dating, interesting

"And you can pound sand!" oooh great comeback Owen

This episode is so BORING OMG

Why the fuck am I watching a shitty Law & Order knock-off when I should be watching a bonkers 911 episode

Oh no Judd's at Billy's

I really do think Billy Burke is good looking and it is a flaw of mine, I don't know what it is about him and he really doesn't look that good in this show but I really love Billy Burke okay

And I WANT HIM TO BE DEVIOUS

Oh Judd

Oh Judd thinks Billy is the arsonist

See this is why YOU DON'T LIE TO THE PEOPLE AROUND YOU

Oh he punched him

God damn everyone is violent in this show

Judddddddddddddd

Uh oh here comes trouble to the "vagrant's" hospital room

Oh it's the arson investigator, their little bluff worked, incredible, amazing, flawless etc

Wow how amazing

It was the ol' switcheroo

Judd punched Billy for nothing

TK and Carlos nearly came to blows for nothing

Now Owen is allowed to watch the interrogation? They'll just let anyone watch those things these days

OH MAN ARE YOU TELLING ME THAT BILLY WAS IN ON IT WITH OWEN THE WHOLE TIME?

Damn it I wanted DEVIOUS god damn it

Fucking cowards

"I assumed it was probably a trap at the hospital which is why I went there anywhere"

But why is he lighting fires

A FEW MONTHS?

A man is dead

Pure theatre

So annoyed that Billy isn't devious

But the Billwen ship sails on, clowns 🤡

Do we think the arsonist has the hots for Owen? 100% yes, right?

He's very happy to see him wink wonk

This doesn't even feel like an episode of 911, it's so goddamn dumb

"I knew you had darkness in you too" – that dude definitely wants to fuck him

Why is he lighting the fires?

They're so dumb

"And now I'm going to repay the favour" – he's talking about YOUR SONS

WHO HE KNOWS ARE TOGETHER

Wow these two dumbasses really have no fucking idea do they

OH HE'S BURNING HIMSELF ALIVE

Wow this is graphic

What the fuck is up with this show and the horribly graphic scenes lately?

That dude is dead yo

"Take away everything that's important to me" AND HE CALLS THE FIREHOUSE FIRST

THE FIREHOUSE IS THE FIRST FUCKING CALL???

Oh okay it did blow up and TK was there so I'll allow it

But hey look on the bright side – Owen gets to remodel again!

And isn't that what he's the best at?

Yo your firehouse is on fire dudes, better call the fire department

Does Judd apologise to Billy or no

Oh here we have TK and Carlos and their perfect love

And Carlos is the one apologising?

No.

Please tell me no

Carlos you are allowed to be pissed at him – ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME

"nobody has to apologise?"

YOUR BOYFRIEND PUSHED YOU AROUND

Oh my god

Wow

Okay.

Look I'm just saying that to me this would be a GIGANTIC RED FLAG but wtf do I know

I'm just saying because I have to – if Carlos was a woman and TK did that? Whole different story gang

Whole completely different mother-fucking story

This show, wow

Wow.

Wow. This is bad.

Domestic violence happens to men too, just saying.

Wow I'm so annoyed that I've paused it to type furiously and rant that wow, they're just not acknowledging that TK was totally out of line? Okay. Wow.

And everyone's just fine with it?

Oh they're just figuring out that he set more than one fire

Maybe there's something else you care about other than the firehouse, Owen

Maybe?

BILLY IS THE ONE WHO FIGURES IT OUT

See this is why Billy is the best

Oh no TK and Carlos are in danger

Oh it's so romantic isn't it? They're gonna fuck now that everything is okay

Wow he left a lot of bombs in Carlos' house

Damn Carlos is hot

No smoke alarms?

That fire has really taken ahold there guys

I'm gonna assume you do have smoke alarms and he disconnected them

Wow he really covered all bases didn't he

Put the bombs in the bedroom as well

RIP Carlos' nice house

"I love you too" after I violently shoved you around today

Oh who needs a fucking fire department when you've got Owen fucking Strand right?

"Carlos" he says flatly. "How are you doing?" he asks in a monotone

"I should've had an extinguisher in the bedroom" DUDE NO ONE DOES

And if TK wanted one in there, he's the fucking firefighter, he should've checked when he moved in instead of assuming like a dumbass

God this show is dumb as fuck and I hate it so much

Billwen for the win

"just a couple of crap magnets" fucking a-men Judd

This show sucks

Oh no TOMMY OH NO

WHAT'S HAPPENING

OH MY GOD

WHAT THE FUCK

What the fuck

Is he dead?

TAKE OWEN AND TK INSTEAD

I’m going to say one more thing about this T*rlos storyline - if they’d done this to Buck & Eddie in the OG, I’d be fucking devastated. Like... if Buck or Eddie pushed the other around the way TK pushed Carlos around, I’d be absolutely gutted. It’s really horrible that they went down that path - whether it’s OOC or not, and you can probably argue that it is - they shouldn’t have included the scene like that in the show. 

It just raises a whole slew of questions, like... is TK violent? Is Carlos used to being pushed around in relationships? Is the show saying that it’s okay that they got a little physical because they’re both men? Domestic violence is never okay, and this is kind of... saying that it is, in certain circumstances?

That is problematic as fuck and such bad writing.

These two are in a relationship where they are living together and supposedly love each other, and this is how the writers choose to portray it? If you’re a T*rlos shipper and you’re upset about this episode, I get it. It’s really fucking terrible that they included that scene - and I would bet cold hard cash it’ll never be addressed again.

This is why LS is a bad show. It’s shitty writing. Shitty storylines. Characters who are interesting are shoved into the background and glossed over in favour of the male white characters. The OG doesn’t have this problem - for everyone complaining that Eddie hasn’t been featured as much this season (and yeah, I hate it too) - you can’t complain that the characters of colour don’t get equal screentime. 

With LS - it’s the Rob Lowe show, and everyone else is just in the background. And that’s why it’s so frustrating to watch - they have a great cast, and this could be a really good show, but it’s just not.

Do you think the LS writers patted themselves on the back after this arc and were like, "yeah we nailed it, we're amazing?"

This episode is -1,000000/10. This show should be cancelled.

Two god awful miserable fucking episodes to go.

Diaz to cleanse:

[dragynkeep]

Weiss for the character ask

meme, accepting.

my top three ships for the character.

freezerburn ( weiss / yang )  —  their relationship is one of the best in the show when it’s actually given some focus ; these two have always been the type of friends to tease each other & play fight but they are also ride or die. freezerburn supremacy.

black ice ( weiss / mercury )  —  they’ve literally never interacted in canon but boy if i don’t love the parallels & potential in this relationship ; especially if mercury didn’t come over to the side of the good guys but did begin to work with them.

monochrome ( weiss / blake )  —  i don’t ship this in canon but in the canon of better writers? absolutely fucking yes. they’re the quintessential star crossed lovers, from two different worlds but they prove that their divides don’t have to be stronger than their love for each other. when put into the hands of competent writers, monochrome really does become the ship that should’ve been canon, for all the reasons shippers want the actual “ canon ” ship canon.

my three least favourite ships for the character.

white rose ( weiss / ruby )  —  while i personally have nothing against the ship as a ship, it’s the cliche of the tsundere & their verbally abused kohai that i really can’t get into. the shippers as well have just been so obnoxious that it turned me off the ship unfortunately.

prismatic ponytails ( weiss / ilia )  —  purely in a canonical setting but this & sunflakes feel like “we’ll pair weiss with a faunus she has no connection to, to show she’s not racist anymore  /  make her bigot father uncomfortable” & i hate it.

bees schnees ( weiss / yang / blake )  —  this otp is bees + weiss in most iterations & i’m not here for it. it felt like some people saw the popularity of freezerburn & their actual canonical connection & felt threatened so they just tacked her onto bees for an ot3.

my biggest criticism for the character.

oh my god, the resolution to her “racism” arc. one, it shouldn’t be an arc, it’s a flaw of her character & needs to be continually kept in mind while writing weiss, that she has these misinformed assumptions about faunus, that she had these biases, that she probably hasn’t gotten rid of them all yet & that’s fine. it makes her a flawed, fleshed out character  —  this isn’t something that should’ve been “solved” in a volume without even an apology to the two faunus she was outright racist to. everything else for weiss afterwards is her white saviouring blake to prove she isn’t racist, with that motivation coming second to protecting her friend & it’s gross, i don’t like it. again, the white comfort of these white writers highly motivated this storyline unfortunately.

my favourite thing about the character.

her personality. weiss is established from day one to be aiming for perfection, & in something that cannot ever be achieved because no one is perfect, we’re given miles & miles of potential for character growth. weiss has to come to terms that she doesn’t have to be perfect & flawless to be deserving of love & it’s one of my favourite things about her, that she is this flawed, imperfect character who has a temper & is snobby & a little bit of a bitch but also cares so deeply about those she lets into her life & will protect them with her life.

a headcanon i have about them.

weiss loves apples, for the nod to her allusion but also because what she ate was heavily controlled by both of her parents. she had to eat healthy, she had her calories monitored, she wasn’t allowed any sweet stuff so apples were the right mix of sweet & tart she was “allowed” because it was healthy.

what i would change about them if i was making a re-write.

definitely let weiss actually win some fights, for gods sakes, she’s meant to be one of the best fighters in her class. she fought against a geist haunted giant statue because she wanted to go to beacon so badly; but then we get to most of her recent fights & again & again, she’s losing. weiss has one of the worst glass jaws in canon & i think it’s also in part because they changed her fighting style.

what i think of their character allusion and what (if anything) i would change about it.

i really enjoy snow white as weiss’s allusion; i think there are a lot of cute little nods in her design & that what we’re given in those who connect to her allusion like klein, it’s a nice take on the tale of a girl just wanting to be accepted for who she is & learning to depend on others. my only criticism is that we really aren’t sure which family members are meant to be which characters in the tale, like the evil queen, the mirror, the huntsman, etc. personally i prefer willow for the evil queen, whitley for the mirror & winter for the huntsman.

[tepkunset]

@avatarfandompolice​​​ is a blog that likes to misuse progressive language in attempt to make ignorant, racist posts sound more intelligent than they are. While most of their blog consists of arguing about ‘zutara,’ (which I recently learned is a ship name for Zuko and Katara from an anon), there is also a large number of posts and reblogs under the premise of being “hot takes” on how unfair it is to address racism in fandom and in media.

Avatarfandompolice is very sensitive about people pointing out that Avatar: The Last Airbender is not, in fact, flawless. That a show made by two white men featuring Asian and Indigenous characters and influences is fully capable of getting things wrong. That their western colonial views are influences all on their own, and it shows. Rather than listen to fans of colour point out things like these posts for example: [Link] [Link] [Link], avatarfandompolice has decided that such things must simply be fake, and has made multiple posts complaining it. This is not just regular ignorance, this is wilful ignorance. The dismissal of critique simply because they cannot fathom not everyone being able to handle the amount of issues they are freely educating others on, or people holding the ability to like something overall while also pointing out where it could be better.

It is my firm belief that you should never absorb media with an uncritical eye. If this was the case, if people just accepted everything given to them, then we would never see any progress. We need to be able to look back at something and say here’s what we did right, and here’s what we need to do better with.

The argument that A:TLA was made in 2012 and therefore should not be analyzed with a modern understanding of the world is downright hilarious, too. As if we aren’t taught to write literature analysis on books and plays that are centuries old in school. In particular regards to the whole cop thing... if anyone reading this seriously thinks that hate and fear of the police is just a 2020 trend, you can meet me in the pit. I was four years old when I learned how terrifying cops are. If your experiences differ, let me tell you that does not make them universal. And as for all the 20-somethings talking about it today, well, gentle reminder that as said by avatarfandompolice right here, the show aired in 2012. Little 10-year-old kids don’t have social media, (at least I hope they don’t,) and unless they grew up experiencing first-hand police terror, probably were not aware of it at that age. I do not know why avatarfandompolice insults people's ability to grow and learn. I can only guess it’s jealously from their lack of ability to do so.

Now let’s address their defences of whitewashing, which is easily the most backwards reaching I’ve seen on this issue in a while. Primarily their defence relies on four repetitive “points” —

Fake minuscule percentages to downplay the high prevalence and extremity of whitewashing in the fandom

Deflecting the addressing of whitewashing with rapid-fire fake scenarios and claims of “reverse racism” / “blackwashing”

Claiming whitewashing isn’t real because people only care about it with Katara

Claiming that calling out whitewashing in fandom is wrong because it hurts artists

I have only so much as dipped my toes into the A:TLA fandom, and even I have seen a lot of whitewashed fan art. If you do an image search for fan art, I guarantee within the first couple rows of results, there will be in the absolute least, a few examples. The idea of these artworks not substantially lightening skin is also just plain inaccurate. Just from a quick Google search, this is literally the first result for ‘Avatar The Last Airbender Katara fan art’:

Avatarfandompolice is also hyper-focused on the lightening of skin, and seems to be under the impression that this is the only component of whitewashing. I come to this conclusion because when someone pointed out the equal prevalence of depicting these characters of colour with Western European features instead of their actual eyes, noses, etc., they rip a giant turd out of their ass and scrawl the words “but stereotyping” over it. No, not all Asian peoples and Indigenous peoples look the same. The original poster made no such claim of this at all. Avatarfandompolice jumped to this conclusion all on their own... (which really says a lot in itself). It is entirely unrelated to the point. The point being the erasure of how these characters look, in favour of giving them whiter features. And guess what? This does hurt. But I’ll get to that below.

The lack of understanding of whitewashing is on full display when avatarfandompolice talks about “blackwashing”; the idea that colouring characters with darker skin is just like whitewashing. Firstly, there is no such thing as “blackwashing.” “Blackwashing,” “brownwashing,” etc. does not exist because it is a false equivalency to whitewashing. It is a false equivalency to whitewashing because white people are not even in the slightest loosing representation when a white character is re-imagined as a racial minority, whereas when racial minorities are re-imagined as white people, they are taking away from what is already very little representation for us. If we lived in a world where the statistics of representation were not so drastically disproportionate, then there would be something to talk about. But if you are really wanting to support equality, you should focus on equitably supporting those who actually need it, not white people. As for specifically depicting characters like Sokka and Katara with darker skin than what they have in the show, the same applies, (so long as it’s not racebending them as we really shouldn’t be taking representation away from each other, and the artist avatarfandompolice ridicules above has done no such thing,) because colourism also exists within nonwhite communities as well.

As for the fake questions about cosplaying, the answer is really simple: Cosplay however you want, but don’t make pretending to be a different race part of your cosplay. If you want to cosplay Katara, you can do it without painting your skin darker, aka brownface. If you want to cosplay Zuko, you can do it without editing yourself to look East Asian, aka digital yellowface. The racist history behind this is an internet search away, but I suppose that is too difficult for avatarfandompolice to do.

Avatarfandompolice has made multiple claims that people must not really care about whitewashing if they only call it out for Katara. It is laughable at best, and sad at worst, that this is the conclusion they come to, and not the fact that unfortunately Katara just happens to be subjected to more whitewashing than other characters. I assume this is from a mix of her popularity as well as being a WOC and not MOC. This is not to say that whitewashing does not exist with male characters—not in the slightest. Half the images on this “10 fan art pictures of Sokka that are just the best” list from CBR are whitewashed. Only that across fandoms, whitewashing is more prevalent in female characters, by my observations at least.

Finally—and this one pisses me off the most—avatarfandompolice claims that whitewashing is no big deal, but calling out whitewashing is too harmful to justify. How fucking dare you put the feelings of artists who can’t handle critique of their work (that they publicly share) over fans of colour, who are constantly subjected to seeing our identities and looks not being worth respecting. As if it doesn’t imprint on your mind from a very young age how only villains ever have your facial features, because they’re ugly and I guess that means you’re ugly. As if there is something wrong with you. As if respecting you is regarded as extra effort, and not just common courtesy.

Whitewashing is a form of colourism, which is a form of racism. It is the favouritism, unconscious or not, of white features and the erasure of visible characters of colour. It is not fandom drama. It is not being too lazy to focus on “real issues” because it is part of a real issue. It is yet another part of why fandom spaces are so uninviting to POC. We live in a society that favours lighter skin. Corporations make fortunes from selling products to bleach your skin, products to contour your features away or go as far as surgery, all to meet beauty standards set by and influenced by white colonizers. That does not exist in A:TLA, and that’s called refreshing escapism. But it’s hard to escape that when the fandom constantly reminds you otherwise. It is a perfect example of how the classic “just let people enjoy things” complaint is nothing but disguised racism, because it’s only ever said regarding white fans’ enjoyment, at the expense of fans of colour.

None of the characters in A:TLA are white. Redesigning them and recolouring them as if they are, be it out of accident or intent is wrong. If you get called out for it, apologize, learn from the experience and do better going forward. You’ll also improve your art this way.

Beyond excusing whitewashing, avatarfandompolice has overt racist posts as well. A Black fan said they like to headcanon Katara as being partially Black; “I swear Katara was a sister. Im convinced there ain't no way she didn't have some black in her.” Avatarfandompolice jumps in saying “She's literally an Inuit but ok” as if being an Inuk person means Katara can’t possibly also be Black. The OP never claimed Katara was not Indigenous, simply that they also saw her as Black. Black Indigenous peoples exist. Black Inuk peoples exist. It is overtly anti-Black to say otherwise. But what even is the point of talking to avatarfandompolice about that? You know, you would think in trying to put such a front up of caring about the Inuit, they would do the most basic learning of the proper grammatical use of Inuit and Inuk. (As is the case with a great many Indigenous Nations, Inuit is both the Nation and plural. Inuk is singular. “An Inuit” / “Inuits” as avatarfandompolice has used just makes their dressed-up racism all the more pathetic. It’s similar to as if you said “Chinas” instead of “Chinese”.)

But all this is nothing, nothing compared to the worst post I had the displeasure of seeing. In a single post, avatarfandompolice manages to squeeze in insult against low income people, Mexican people, Jewish people, and Black people in a mockery of financial help posts. Absolutely disgusting, childish behaviour from a place of privilege. As someone who has had no option but to make such a post before, more than once, let me fucking tell you that the embarrassment and desperation when in that situation is unparalleled. It is not done lightly. It is done when you are at the last resort of having nothing but hope that the combined generosity of others will be enough to save you and your family. And what adds a whole other level to the odiousness of avatarfandompolice’s post is that they specifically targeting low income minorities to boot. Because we’re all poor beggars, right?

All in all, for someone who prides themselves in calling others ignorant, avatarfandompolice has to be one of the most obtuse fandom blogs I have ever scrolled through. They are as vile as they are pathetic, and my sincere sympathy for anyone who has been unfortunate enough to interact with them. It has been a while since I so strongly recommend blocking someone.

[cescalr]

Teen Wolf

To be fair, I think all my fandoms are controversial about ships aren't they?

put a fandom in my ask and i’ll answer:

otp - Stalia! all the way, babey!!!

favourite canon pairing - I would've said Stalia BUT SEASON FIVE MY BELOATHED (it's my favourite season the Angst is so good oh my god it's great writing fodder. best season for a ficcer is s5 i take no criticism on this matter i am right) so. uhhhh can't be scira s6 my actually beloathed. marrish amounted to like nothing at all. Chrissa!!! chrissa yes chrissa good chrissa wholesome chrissa flawless we like chrissa in this household. I think Draeden though has to be the best canon one just because it's around longer than Chrissa and like. I adore Braeden and she made me not hate Derek which is a Huge feat bc for some reason for a really long time I literally loathed him akjsg;alskdjg like chill out, Cesca. He's a dude. He's just a dude. (s2 Derek my forever despised though. cannot find it in me to like him before Braeden shows up. I tolerate him. I have no idea why by the way his like whole story is exactly something i would normally grab with both hands and never let go of. I will defend him though K*te A*gent can meet me in the boxing ring I'll win. I'll win through sheer spite.)

worst pairing ever - sterek #notsorry. once again in canon they can barely tolerate each other (in the seasons that spawned the pairing) and then in the follow they're like. allies-because-scott. That's it. Also i kind of just get big-brother-little-brother vibes from them when they manage to get along so like.... no.... also. the most reason. Derek's history with Kate and being a sixteen year old preyed upon by a 23/4 year old would make it... really bad to have him... be 24.... and with Stiles... who was 16.... you understand? yes. character wise i just don't think it'd work out.

guilty pleasure pairing - no such thing as guilty pleasure but ig people would think maybe steo or staleo idk? but yeah I am guilty about nothing. I will ship everything without fear. (steter might be the most genuine one though because back when I was dumb it was very hypocritical. but at the same time I only do it in very specific circumstances (time-travel/ages are changed; never in canon) and mostly i prefer the whole Paralellism thing they've got going on - they're basically like. the same person it's weird - so there's that.)

a pairing you want to see more - like my very specific brand of steo. but also my very specific brand of everything bc i am Very Specific like my very specific brand of stora and malira and allydia and chrissa and marrish and-

that pairing everyone likes but you’re like “lol no” - stydia? Not my vibe my friends. Used to be, used to be. I was not very smart at 15.

favorite non-romantic pair - uhhhh jeez uhh steter is so intriguing bc it's just so bizarre in like. our souls are the same (derogatory) kind of way. platonic frenemies steter is hilarious and psychologically fascinating. Stiles is like, one of the only people Peter respects. When Derek sees Stiles in the locker room wearing black it's mirroring Derek listening to Peter in the locker room wearing black. it's all connected perfect combinations are rare in an imperfect world etc etc. Their canon dynamic (I don't even know what to categorise it as) is so goddamn interesting. But also like sciles, though I'll ship them too their friendship/brotherly bond is everything to me. And I tend to see it (as in, from my perspective on the canon) more often than not as mostly one-sided romantically/sexually speaking (from stiles). so sciles. but also i'm really fond of stira platonically (I'll take the romance, but we do need Some platonic friendships on this damned show alk;sjdfg;laskg). and absolutely scolia. Scolia is a great friendship! s6 does not exist. I tend to ship scydia more romantically later on in the show but like around s3/4 it's such a good friendshp, I love it. But yeah no s6 should have been scydia, and I'll stand by that (I'm including s6A as well as 6B in this. stydia and scolia should not have happened imo). Stydia is actually really really good platonic and horrible terrible romantic, so I have to go with Stydia I think. Non-romantic stydia my beloved <3

[gloochie]

here’s a fuckin rant about how in love i am with sunny’s portrayal of realistic anorexia // ed tw obviously

doesn’t take up the character’s entire personality

yeah there’s tons of shows with characters that have eating disorders, but usually that is the only purpose of the character, so their entire personality is just the eating disorder. yes that is how it can feel for the individual in real life, that they are nothing without their eating disorder, but that isn’t how other people see them. their friends see a regular person and often don’t even see the eating disorder at all.

dennis is orthorexic and anorexic, that’s obvious, but that isn’t all that either the other characters or the audience see. as he’s primarily known as a ‘psychopathic narcissistic serial killer / golden god’, especially by ‘dudebros’. the other characters obviously think this as well, as the word ‘eating disorder’ and ‘dennis’ have yet to coexist in a sentence, and only on one or maybe two occasions have the other characters seemed to show any sort of concern for his habits.

the other characters don’t care or lack knowledge [ highlighting male eating disorder / mental illness awareness ]

from memory there are three occasions where the other characters seem to recognise his unhealthy behaviour. [ although there are many references to his ed in various other episodes ]

the first example is in ‘the gang exploits a miracle’ which is also the first and most major portrayal of his eating disorder in the show. dee had told him that his face looked fat, so he proceeded to not eat for three days. when frank discovered he was fasting, he said ‘why the hell are you fasting’ and sounded annoyed. and when he noticed him spacing out, he told him that he should eat but said nothing else. then when dennis faints at the end , he merely says ‘that’s what you get for not eating’. so the entire time, frank found his behaviour irritating rather than worrying. when dee discovers that she caused dennis to fast for three days, she expresses faux concern before informing him that he’s a terrible person. despite finally revealing to him that his face doesn’t look fat, she doesn’t hesitate to continue to put him down. [ mac and charlie seem to have absolutely no significant interaction with him in this episode, so their opinions at this point don’t exist ]

the next episode is ‘franks pretty woman’ dennis takes mac to the doctor to get a physical / blood test to try and show him that he’s unhealthy. dennis is then shocked to discover that both of them are unhealthy - albeit on different sides of the scale -, as it is revealed that dennis has anemia, dehydration, low blood pressure, and multiple vitamin deficiencies. these are all side affects from a restrictive diet. he also explains to mac in detail the other steps he takes, including skipping meals, and excessively exercising. mac does not seem too phased besides from exclaiming ‘that’s sounds miserable’. when dennis almost faints and informs mac he hadn’t eaten yet that day, mac reacts by saying he’s going to get him something to eat, which he does. the two end up eating chimichangas. mac says [ paraphrasing ] ‘see? i told you they’re good.’

the final time dennis’ eating habits are really noticed by the gang is in ‘the gang chokes’ in which he claims to have an ‘allergy’ to gluten, sugar, and dairy. this is obviously false as in previous episodes he’s eaten cheese, pizza, and other such things. despite mac forgetting, he tries to help dennis stick to his ‘dietary requirements’. later on in the episode, dennis claims to have ‘depleted his electrolytes’ and had fallen ill due to the pollen in the air, although he was acting similar to ‘exploits a miracle’ which may point to him fasting. mac is quick to help, he picks him up and carries him bridal style all the way home [ despite dropping him twice ]. finally, dennis grows sick from drinking the pizza and soda shakes that mac has been giving him, and mac claims it ‘wrecks havoc on his system’ which is why he’s sick, although the real reason is rarther ambiguous [ actually intolerance, mild refeeding syndrome, generally unwell? ]

dennis does not look anorexic.

this is possibly my favourite part of their portrayal. in movies and tv that are made to raise awareness about anorexia, the character in question is almost always deathly pale, extremely underweight. however, dennis isn’t like that at all. in seasons 9 and 10 he looks to be a very healthy weight, and in previous seasons he was still relatively healthy.

this is amazing to see because not all cases of anorexia are anorexia nervosa, not all patients meet the weight requirement for the nervosa diagnoses. so portraying someone with disordered eating but a non disordered body is great representation and often more realistic.

[ despite this, there’s obvious proof that glenn howerton has begun slimming down for his role as of at least season 14, dennis is starting to physically show signs of anorexia. ]

fatphobia projection

dennis is extremely fatphobic. in ‘aluminium monster vs fatty magoo’ he calls the slim models ‘fat’ and ‘ugly’, to the point where he takes their place [ while wearing a corset ]. he is also shown to find mac disgusting when he gains weight, he finds it so distressing that he obtains illegal medication and drugs mac so he will lose weight.

this is all a very common thing with anorexia and other restrictive eating disorders, the ‘ed voice’ that tells you that you’re fat says that others are fat as well, and your illness makes you internally fatphobic.

he isn’t just insecure about his weight.

there are many different reasons that one gets an eating disorder, whether due to trauma, preexisting mental illness, from stress, parental abuse etc. however one main reason is to gain a feeling of ‘control’ over ones body, to be able to shape it to your will and make it as ‘perfect’ as you can.

in dennis’ case, he claims to see himself as a ‘golden god’, sculpted by the gods, and just all round flawless. this is extremely obviously false, as the second a flaw is pointed out to him he takes extreme measures to rectify such a thing:

‘the gang exploits a miracle’ - he starves himself for three days after dee says his face is fat

‘how mac got fat’ - he dyes his hair and gets a chemical peel after feeling pressured to keep up his ‘reputation’ as the attractive one in the group

‘the high school reunion’ - he wishes to make a good impression at the reunion, and it’s pointed out that he was wearing a girdle to ‘seem thin for the occasion’, he was also wearing makeup but it’s not clear exactly when dennis started wearing makeup on a daily basis so i’m unsure if that was normal or not.

‘dee day’ - he’s extremely insecure and withdrawn without his makeup, he’s unable to hit on the council woman. when he later returns to the bar with his makeup back on, he denies wearing any and claims he was merely tired. this insinuates he wants the gang to believe his looks are natural and not fabricated

there’s also the fact that they’re representing male eating disorders! i don’t think i’ve ever seen a piece of mainstream media that portrays a male with an eating disorder. it’s fucking amazing of them to do it, not to mention do it as well as they have done.

in conclusion, RCG is portraying the most realistic and accurate disordered person i’ve ever seen in media.

[baddeborah-blog]

Poor Me!

Our Debs is really kicking me in at the arse this week. When I say this week, I mean this year; and when I say arse, I mean crotch, repetitively and with a crow bar. Deborah of course is the cute name given to the voice in my head. The one inside my skin that tells me I'm not good enough. The snake like, seductive temptress that wants me to bite the apple of self loathing. The apple is comfortable. I've bitten through the tough skin time and time again, now I'm cosy in the rotten decay within. But back to the apple it's warm, comfortable why would I want to leave? I know that's a wanky analogy. But, let's be fair, depression is comfortable. Why would you want to get off the sofa when Netflix and self sabotage are there to keep you safe? What if you fell down the stairs and died, just because your grand thoughts got you out of bed?!

Look how gross you are, sat on the sofa eating like a pig. Have you even showered this week? This is why no one likes you.

I can't win can I Deb? Cunt.

Deborah has been in the driving seat during this delightful lockdown period. By the way Deb is very pleased to meet you, and simultaneously tells me I'm a dick for bothering to write this. Poor me!

I'd like to say she's had time off, buts she's so committed to her job, I doubt she's slept! Poor thing. Instilling doubt seems to be her favourite part of the day at the moment, before kicking back with her favourite film 'Every mistake you've ever made, ever.' When I say ever, I mean that in the most whole hearted, grotesque way possible. Every single interaction, played simultaneously. Then she throws on her favourite album, 'Every fuck up you've made' probably the disco extended edition she got from limewire. Yes, she is that girl.

I remember you random costa coffee lady with the warm smile... Or was it warm says Deborah, are you sure it wasn't sympathetic because you looked like shit? You usually look like shit actually, remember that time you looked like shit at that job interview? 'That's why you didn't get it, and why you'll never get another job ever again' she shouts over her disco megamix. She has an awful voice, but she just loves the sound of it. I think I do too.

Deborah, that woman smiled because I said her hair was lovely! But why would she want a compliment from you? Remember you're very awkward in public, she probably cringed when you complimented her. Off she goes, laughing manically but still maintaining her flawless appearance. I'm glad she's gone. But as always she leaved chaos in her wake.

Deb is a bitch. God she hates being called Deb.

Deb.

A cold hearted, want to take everything from you, bitch. She's also stunningly beautiful. So beautiful that she has this knack of quelling any beauty I feel about myself. She also has her friends Annie Anxiety, Leaving you Leona, Try harder Terrance etc etc etc, but let us not get into Debs multiple personalities, she doesn't like me doing that. I'm not sure that's particularly healthy for your other personality to have multiple personalities either...

For ease, we'll label them all under the umbrella of Dick head Debs from HR. Let's pretend she's that twat in the office who has perfect hair and somehow always smells divine. How does she have her life so together?!

Debbie and her personalities belong to me really, but some how separating them from myself makes this easier. After all, how else would you justify letting someone else tell you you're a dick all day every day for 15 years and not tell them to bugger off? So, this is me, shouting bugger off Deborah!

At least, starting to whisper it.

Poor me!

Poor depressed me, typing this sat in my house, with my heating on. Poor me, with my family around me, or at least at the end of the phone. Poor me, with a full fridge and money in the bank. But is that Deborah's voice I hear? Sometimes I'm not sure which one of us it is.

Yes, I am fortunate, but I'm also having a shit time. Poor me isn't wallowing, it's about accepting. My mind is tired and poorly and needs attention. It's been ignored and patched up with faddy meditation and medication for years. If I had a broken bone, I wouldn't keep using it and expecting perfect performance. So, why do I expect that from my mind?

This is day one, day one of real painful self care. Fuck bubble baths and face masks, this is facing the harsh reality, telling that dick head Debbie from HR to bugger off.