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skylarsblue · 2 years ago

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Be At Ease

(I replayed Our Life for the millionth time, and with the Baxter DLC in progress, I wanted to write something. GB Patch hired writers, and I would kill for an opportunity(that I can't have for various reasons). Since I can't, I'm gonna just write what I would put in if I had the power to because I am an absolute bitch for comfort fluff.)

Notes; Gender-Neutral pronouns used, the use of Y/N(forgive me), mild MC story imposing(I made up the job you'd have but it's not relevant at all), mildly sad undertones?? it's comfort fluff. Possible ooc Baxter? I have only his cameos and Tumblr posts from GB to go on.

Rejoining with Baxter had been fairly enjoyable, even if unexpected. A lot had changed. Excluding things like appearance, but job-wise. Y/N had gone into the hospitality business and very quickly became quite successful off of it, starting a new branch of hotels, rather than working for a pre-existing one. The first one made was, of course, situated in Sunset Bird. It seemed only fitting. With things like tourists, business conferences, and other things, it became an affluent career. One thing that brought in people and good money were weddings. Whether they chose the hotel to stay at or decided to rent it for the venue/after-party.

Naturally, when they got the arrangements to meet with this couple's wedding planner, they hadn’t expected such a familiar face. It was a pleasant surprise though. That Summer a few years ago had felt all too short, spending more time with him was a great opportunity in their mind. He seemed to agree. Though, one thing that always stood out back then as it did in the present, was just how often Baxter would backtrack. Always sensing the risk of “stepping on someone’s toes”, as he once said. He was good at keeping it subtle, but Y/N was a bit more observant than most. They liked to think so, anyway. For every time he would get comfortable, let himself be how he was naturally, a rather charming flirt with the best intentions…He’d step back. Hesitate. Maybe it was how he was raised or maybe he had experiences in the past where such behavior got him into trouble. But watching him take so much personal effort to prevent him from just being honest with himself, well it was exhausting as it was upsetting.

At some point, it got too much to ignore. Especially when he still did it when alone with Y/N, in his own apartment no less.

“You carry yourself so tensely…like you’re always afraid of misstepping.” They said softly, voice airy and light. The apartment was dim. Moonlight spilled in from large windows, it was enough to see. He stood there with his arms comfortably crossed. In his normal posture, face now scrunched up with some confusion, though he kept a laid-back smile to mask it. “Whatever do you mean?” He chuckled quietly. They looked at him with sympathy and stepped forward. “You know exactly what I mean,” Y/N began. “You’ll let go every now and then, but only for a moment. Not even a minute later you’ll freeze over again. Backtrack, worried you’ve done too much. That can’t be easy. It’s got to be tiresome.”

Baxter swallowed and cleared his throat. He went to speak despite not really having a response formulated in his head. They beat him to it. “Stop. Just for a moment.” He blinked and stopped himself from speaking. “Drop your arms. Let’em fall like dead weight.” Though a bit hesitant, he did as asked, still confused. They rose their hands carefully and covered his eyes, holding his face in the process. Careful and mindful of his hesitation and confusion. “Don’t ask questions, just listen. Breathe in and focus on that alone.” Y/N whispered. Not raising their voice more than that. It would break the peace of the air around the both of them.

It was quiet. Occasionally, there was a passing car, the rush of wind past windows, but specifically was the distant sound of the sea. The apartment was close to the beach, one of its features, the view was as beautiful as the sound. Baxter wasn’t much for doing things like swimming or surfing like Cove was, but he did find some peace in the ocean. Albeit a different kind of peace. It used to remind him of tense fishing trips with his father, something he wasn’t very good at, nor was it something he was really interested in to begin with. But with the arrival into Sunset Bird for that one Summer, his opinion of it changed. Now he considered it a holder of fond memories and a time of independence and acceptance. And aside from that, there was their voice. Maybe he was biased in finding that sound the most favorable. He heard them mutter to keep his eyes closed as they removed their hands, he listened, feeling them briefly brush his bangs from his face. A delicate act that held nothing but sweetness, and though embarrassing, it was enough to make his heart stutter. If only for a moment. Gently placed hands rested on his shoulders, and he tensed momentarily. “You don’t have to be so perfect all the time.”

“You’re meticulous, you were taught to be, I know that. But I’ve seen those moments where you lighten up, loosen the reins, let yourself breathe. Then you pull yourself back again. Don’t do that, not right now.” They insisted. Their voice was warm like the Summer air outside. They applied the tiniest amount of pressure on his shoulders, barely noticeable, a light signal to let them drop. That coupled with the words of encouragement helped them loosen further. Though just a few moments ago, Baxter was certain they were already as relaxed as they’d get. “Don’t put any effort into it. You’re in your own home. No one is here to judge your movements, you’re not being scored. You’re just here. And it’s only me…” His face twitched with a frown for a moment. Not out of anger or annoyance, but a bit of sadness. He knew he was like this, if subconsciously, but he figured he hid it well. There was a bitterness to the note that someone noticed. Even if it came with an aftertaste of sweetness. They had cared enough to notice.

The same gentle hold from his shoulders rose to his face again, cupping it lightly, grazing their nails over the skin. Making him shiver slightly. Warm palms against his cheeks, a mild pressure against his cheekbones applied by their thumbs. “Take a deep breath.” With their instruction he did so, it was a bit stuttered, shaky. “Let the stress leave with it…” Y/N added. “Let it all go.” The effect was strange and sudden. For just a moment, his body went slack completely. Everything melted for the quickest second, leaving his knees weak. Not enough to fall, but enough to stumble slightly, ultimately ending with him leaning forward. They essentially caught him, moving their head to the side to let his forehead rest on their shoulder. Without missing a beat, they adjusted their posture to let him have better support. One hand rested on his shoulder blades, the other delicately brushed through his hair. Ensuring he wouldn’t fall and more importantly, he wouldn’t be left vulnerable on his own. Y/N whispered reassurance and praise, it kept him from freezing over again.

“There you go…just let it leave. It’s alright. You’re okay. You deserve to feel at ease.” Baxter let out a shaky sigh and wobbled a little where he stood. But it was nothing but pleasant, completely light. As if a ton had suddenly dropped off, a weight he had been so used to, he didn’t know was there. He’d lived with it for so long that he hadn’t even noticed. People could get used to anything eventually. For a brief moment, he wondered if they’d somehow used magic to get him this way. Even though that concept was completely ludicrous. He brushed off the thought quickly. He didn’t want to think, not yet, he had plenty of time in his life to overthink his hours away. Staying like this…this was nice, and he couldn’t help but indulge in it. For a while anyway, after all, they said he deserved it.

#ourlife #our life beginnings & always #gb patch games #gb patch #our life baxter #our life x reader #baxter ward #visual novel #i didnt like him at first #he grew on me #now i just wanna hug him #give him a forehead smooch

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thedandelion-writer · 4 years ago

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❝sleeping habbits, liyue edition❞

Pairings: Xiao x gn!reader, Ganyu x gn!reader, Zhongli x gn!reader, Keqing x gn!reader

<- Mondstadt edition

A/N: I just thought it'd be cute, okay?

P.s. This is a modern au just because

He sleeps with a nightlight and you cannot tell me otherwise

Don't tease him about it! He will get all cold and snappy

You know why he keeps it on though, it helps with the nightmares

Xiao doesn't really like to sleep, so sometimes you have to coax him into bed

Even then, he's always up before you are

You rub your eyes awake, rolling over to his side of the bed. It was cold, evident that he'd been up for a while now. The window was open, letting in the cool morning air. Xiao always said it helped calm him when his head started getting too loud.

"Breakfast is getting cold," came a gruff voice.

He was leaning against the doorframe.

"It's not my fault you made it so damn early," you yawned and stretched, not bothering to even sit up.

"Come kiss me good morning, or else I'm going back to sleep."

You closed your eyes, offering him your cheek while still comfortably swaddled in blankets. It took some time for him to come over, the crossed arms and annoyed face did nothing to cover his red cheeks.

Briefly pressed his lips to your temple, muttering a "childish" before he walked out.

Sometimes, you'd even have to sing him to sleep

He won't ask you to do it, but when you do, he sleeps relatively better

Acts like he doesn't want you close but when you snuggle up to him, he never refuses

Lets you steal all the blankets because he'd give you the world if you asked for it

The type of person to have a schedule of when to sleep and when to wake up

According to Ganyu, sunlight is nature's alarm clock

She keeps the curtains open to let natural moonlight in because for some reason, it makes her feel safe. And in the morning, she's up when the first rays of sunshine hit her face

Would love to sleep in if she could honestly, but duty calls (she'll just take an afternoon nap later)

Also snores lightly, not enough to disturb you, but enough for you to coo to yourself at how adorable she sounds

For some reason, it was still dark, and you were already awake.

"What time is it," you made sure to lower your voice, then propping up your body on your elbows to check the time on Ganyu's bedside table.

"4:32 am...what the hell..."

You looked over to your sleeping girlfriend, hair looking an even deeper hue of indigo due to the pre-sunrise sky. She whimpered, shifting about a little, and you were afraid she would wake up, so you caressed hair ever so gently.

"Shh, it's alright," you whispered. "That's it, don't wake up yet, you've got a busy day tomorrow."

You kept your hand on the side of her head, eventually falling asleep to her soft snores and the peacefulness of it all.

She gets cold feet, so one day you decided to buy her a bunch of cute socks and now she wears them everywhere. Even to work!

Ganyu also likes scented candles, preferably nature inspired fragrances like rain, grass, etc

You grew to like them as well, and now you both can't sleep without lighting one every night before bed

This man sleeps like a rock

No pun intended, I'm being serious

If anyone remembers that scene in Mulan 2 when Mushu unsucessfully tries to wake Shang up by crashing his cymbals? Then yeah, like that

Minus the part where Shang eventually wakes up

I'm only half kidding

He doesn't move either. Like at all.

Zhongli would stay in the same position throughout the night, which is usually facing you

This makes for opportunities

"Lao gong~" you inched your face closer to his, testing if he was asleep before proceeding admiring him as if he were a marble statue at a museum.

You poked his cheek. No reaction. You brushed his bangs away from his forehead, kissing him there, down to his nose and then at the corner of his mouth. You'd have to save one more for later.

"Truly, how did I get so lucky?" You settled in between one arm, lying your head down on his chest.

If only we could stay like this forever. That would be enough.

The beating of his heart matched yours, the sheets intermingled your warmth with his, never have you felt this connected to another being. In the quiet moments of the night, you told him you loved him.

*lăo gōng (老公) a sweet way of calling one's husband

Whenever either of you have trouble sleeping, tea is always the answer (or just for those cold nights)

Therefore, a boiler, tea pots/cups, and a variety of tea bags could be found in the bedroom

Goodnight kisses are a must, almost always given from him to you.

No matter when she sleeps, Keqing will always wake up at the same time every morning

And no matter where you both start out at the beginning of the night, she would always end up tangled with you

Not that you mind, but she got all huffy and embarrassed at first

Now she just accepts that it's her fault

Something was tickling your nose. In a bleary daze, you tried to lift your hand to swipe whatever annoyance was causing it--to no avail. Both your arms, and even your legs were locked down by a weight.

You blowed at it, scrunched up your face to hopefully get rid of the itch. Which backfired because your movements caused Keqing to stir, tilting her head up a bit and shoving hair into your already violated nostrils.

"Oh archons I'm gonna..." your eyes turned watery, shoulders rising as you tried to suppress it. And failed, yet again.

"A-ACHOO!"

You lurched violently, waking your lover up in the process. But at least the itch went away, and your limbs were no longer constricted!

"Y/N, couldn't you have sneezed into a pillow?" Keqing grumbled (as you can tell, not a morning person).

"I'm sorry I'm sorry, it's just...your head was so close to my face and-"

She held up a palm as if to say 'I get it, please shut up', and laid back down, scooching to the end of her side of the mattress.

As if that would do anything! She'd likely invade your territory again before daybreak, you guarantee it.

"Uhh- tian xin, maybe if you tied your hair? You know you're just going to come to me again."

Keqing thought about it for a moment (or maybe drowsiness delayed her reaction time), so she reached into her bedside drawer, handing you a ribbon.

She spread out her locks onto the pillow and turned to face the other way, pointing for you to do it for her.

You chuckled, getting to work, even giving her a short scalp massage in the process. After tying the knot, she was back to being fast asleep.

Snaking an arm around her waist, you kissed her shoulder, wishing to join her once again in slumber.

*tián xīn (甜心) meaning sweetheart

**mom i'm finally using my sucky chinese for something useful, aren't you proud?

You can't tell me she doesn't have at least one Morax plushie

One time you got jealous because it was like that one meme

Ah yes, my girlfriend and her favourite thing to cuddle to sleep, her Rex Lapis doll

You find out that Keqing actually needs to hold something to sleep properly

Which is cute but she'd deny deny deny

Later on, she latches onto you (as shown above)

You're warm, she says

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johnsamericano · 3 years ago

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𝔖𝔲𝔤𝔞𝔯 ℜ𝔲𝔰𝔥 𝔧.𝔧.𝔥 •3•

I hope this ain't getting shitty. Thank you for reading, sexy people. Send me a message or an ask if you'd like to be added to the tag list.

warnings: hungover jaehyun, age gap, hospitals, nothing too extreme.

sugar rush m.list.

taglist: @thoreeo @trustmahluv @sunny-nyu @nanascupid @silent-potato @painted-hills

Yoonoh woke up on a strange bed, the mattress stiffer than the one he had back home. He refused to open his eyes, fearing that the daylight would worsen his headache.

“Wake up, sunshine.” He groaned, all the memories from the past night hitting him like a truck. “Come on, I made breakfast.”

His eyelids finally fluttered open, frown softening at the sight of you in a messy bun and your cute pajamas.

“How come you look so fresh?” The dark circles under his eyes had deepened in the span of a few hours. Thank God he didn't have to work that day.

“I always look fresh.” You seemed to be more comfortable around him. Perhaps it was because you had to tuck him in last night. “Up.”

You tugged both of his limp hands, forcing him to sit up.

“What did you cook? It smells nice.” He scrunched up his nose like a little kid.

“Eggs, bacon, and hash browns.” Fast as lightning, he got up from bed. On his way to the kitchen, he noticed the blanket hanging from the edge of your sofa. Disappointment pinched his heart.

“Why didn't you sleep with me? You would've been more comfortable.”

You set two plates on the small table, pulling the pan out of the stove to serve them.

“You spread yourself all over the bed as soon as I laid you down.” You lied successfully. You didn’t have the heart to tell him you weren’t that comfortable yet.

You let the pan down on the kitchen counter, taking a seat in front of him.

“Do you still want to visit my father?” Sparkling orbs stared at him timidly, fearing his answer would be negative.

“I mean…” You hummed, trying not to give it as much importance. “I do want to go!” He quickly corrected himself, frantically shaking his hands. “It’s just that I don't want to meet your father like this.” He pointed at his bed hair, which had only become messier since he woke up.

“You’re acting like he's gonna see you.” There was a slight bitterness in your tone, along with a fake grin.

“Alright, let's do this instead...” Yoonoh sat up straight, clearing his throat as if he were about to give a speech. “We’ll have breakfast, you'll shower quickly, and then we’ll drive to my house so I can fix myself. How does that sound?”

“So I'm finally gonna see your mansion? How exciting.” You kicked his leg teasingly under the table, his cheeks inevitably dipping as he tried to suppress a smile. “I bet you have some peacocks in your backyard.”

“And there's also a dolphin in my pool.” He let out a hearty laugh, extending his arm over the table to grab your hand.

His house was most definitely not what you expected.

It was about the size of the one you grew up in, the decoration inside minimalistic. There were no expensive paintings framed with pure gold, only pictures of him and his family. There was a small backyard you could access through the French door in the kitchen. Half of it was occupied by a greenhouse.

“I had to donate the peacocks to the zoo.” He whispered as you looked through the glass door, squeezing your shoulders with his slim fingers.

“What a shame.” Hesitantly, he wrapped both of his limbs around your torso, letting his chin rest stop of your head. Your heartbeat was thumping loudly against your chest. Yoonoh surely felt it but decided not to comment on it.

“There’s a Tv in my room in case you want to watch something while I shower.” A hint of mischief adorned his honey-like voice. “Or you can come in and watch me instead.”

“Stop!” Your elbow connected with his ribs out of pure panic, making him bend in pain with his hands covering the injured spot.

“It was a joke...” He whispered, teeth gritting together.

I made him mad, you thought. Should you escape or face the consequences of his anger? All thoughts erased from your mind as he grabbed your calves, lifting you over his shoulder.

“Put me down!” You hit his back with closed fists, unable to see the expression on his face. “Yoonoh!”

He went up the stairs, proceeding to enter his room and throw you on his bed. Thousands of dirty scenarios crossed your mind before he threw himself on top of you, crushing your bones under his muscular body.

“My...ribs...”

“Oh, sorry, what is that?” To make matters worse, his fingers tickled your sides, provoking a fit of desperate giggles to escape your mouth. “I’m not hearing an apology.”

“Sorry! Sorry!” His hands finally stopped, giving you time to breathe. Nonetheless, he remained laid on your chest, using his forearms to lift his weight. “Aren’t you gonna shower?”

“I like you.”

The confession was so sudden, so raw it took you some time to finally react. But you had no words to give him an answer, instead, you combed your fingers through his long hair, massaging his scalp while waiting for him to speak up again.

“I never thought I'd be feeling more than friendly affection for you. Our agreement doesn't include love, after all. But I've started feeling like a teenager all over again. I can't help but get excited whenever you call me. Do you know how sweet your voice sounds through the phone?” He sighed, discouraged at your lack of response. “I guess you're not there yet.”

Instead of verbally answering, you planted a sweet kiss on his head, right where small, grey hairs had started growing.

“I’m not good with words.”

“That’s alright.” He snuck his hands under your back, holding you tightly as a sudden need to nurture you took over him. The mature image he had of you faded in less than a second, leaving behind a young, troubled woman. “I’ll shower quickly so we can go see your pops. I bet we’ll get along just fine, maybe even go golfing when he wakes up.”

“I forgot you're almost the same age. Creepy.” He smiled, though uneasiness started steering in his guts.

“Does that bother you?” He asked without giving it a second thought.

“I don't know yet.”

(...)

The man with high cheekbones and bruised skin laid limp on the hospital bed. Yoonoh had been working on his case for about a month, yet, it only started feeling real the moment he entered the room.

“This is my dad.” All emotions had escaped your eyes as if your soul wasn't there anymore. Only an empty shell.

“You look so much like him.” he was afraid touching you wouldn't be the right thing to do, so instead, he said: “He seems like a suitable golf buddy.”

Tension finally loosened its grip around his body as you snorted, pigment returning to your cheeks. Finally, he wrapped his hand around yours.

“He will wake up, y/n.”

“He’s taking his sweet time.” You glanced back at the laying figure, skinnier with every day he spent asleep. “I want someone to pay for taking away the last person that loved me.”

The last person that loved you. Would Yoonoh be able to fill that spot? Not yet, probably. He couldn't modify the depth of his feelings, but he could surely give you the vengeance you longed.

“Do you trust me?” With your eyes still glued to your father, you nodded. “Then I can assure you we’ll win the case.”

“I know we will.”

He sat silently with you, holding your hand without saying a word. The smell of alcohol and the beeping noise of machines made him nauseous. He hated hospitals. You noticed the change in his demeanor, his hand becoming cold while holding yours with strength.

“Do you wanna go?”

“No!” He smiled through the pain, scooting his chair closer to lay your hand on his lap.

He wouldn't agree to get his ass off the plastic chair. You had to tell him you were hungry for him to finally stand up, still clutching your hand like your father did when you were still a kid. His parental behavior caused several emotions to stir inside your guts, so mixed up you couldn't quite put a finger on any of them.

“What do you want to eat?” The tension finally left his body once out of the building.

“Soup.” You smiled while swiping your thumb on top of his knuckles. “I know a place, but to be honest, it isn't good. So we can go to the store and get the ingredients to- but you can't cook.”

“I’m up for a cooking lesson if you are.” He wanted to see your pretty smile again. Maybe making a fool of himself would help. “Let’s hit the road.”

“Wow, so cool.”

“I know.”

(...)

“Can you grab that can of chicken broth?” You pointed at the high shelf, letting go of Yoonoh’s hand to allow him to move freely

“I have a better idea.” He dragged you by the arm so you were standing in front of him, trapped between his body and the shelf. “I’ll lift you so you can reach it.” Matching his words, his hands grasped your waist, ready to carry you.

“Stop!” You slapped his hands repeatedly between giggles. Ignoring your complaints, he started lifting you. “Yoonoh!”

“Yoonoh?” A feminine voice had him placing you back on your feet in less than a second.

“Seryeong, I didn't expect to see you here.” His hands remained seated on the curve of your waist.

“Neither did I. I was surprised when Sungchan told me you'd left early yesterday.” She seemed a bit older than you but still younger than the man behind you.

“I had some matters to take care of.” She eyed you from head to toes with a smug grin plastered on her lips. Just by the look of her clothes, you could tell she was as wealthy as Yoonoh. You feared the scene would turn into a tv worthy drama.

“I’ll go get the chicken breast.” You tried escaping his grip, only to be pulled closer to his warmth.

“No need to. It's already inside the cart.”

Why am I so dumb?

“Does your father know about your little girlfriend?” She asked without hesitation.

“I guess.”

“And why didn't he tell me anything?” She cocked an eyebrow, his hands finally loosening around your body and allowing you to move from your position.

“Look, this is something you should talk about with him. Now, if you excuse us...” With a hand on your shoulder, he began pushing the cart to the next aisle, the chicken broth long forgotten.

“Is this some kind of arranged marriage situation?”

“Something like that.” His hands were tense while holding the cart, knuckles turning white from the strength used. “Before you start asking, I'm not really in the mood and I don't want to direct my bad mood toward you. Let's talk about something else, alright?”

Who was that woman that had the power to turn him into a literal raging ball of fire with just a few words?

#nct au #nct imagines #nct ot21 #nct smut #nct x reader #nct #nct scenarios #nct 127 #nct angst #nct jaehyun #nct fluff #nct jung yoonoh

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eunoiaflow3r · 4 years ago

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not ur friend

spencer reid x reader

aaron hotchner x reader

part two - part three

a/n: haven’t written for spence in a while lol. hope you guys like it. wow...and i wrote him as an ass. bahahaha what am i going through i’m so sorry.

warning(s): language. angst. not proofread. will be mistakes.

word count: 1.8k

request(ed): no.

summary: y/n overhears something she shouldn’t have. this conversation alters her relationship.

not ur friend by jeremy zucker.

———————-——————&————————————

Hang up, if you ever think of calling me up. Not afraid to say it, darling.

3 days.

It’s been an entire weekend of you ignoring Spencer and his ever intruding phone calls. This wouldn’t have been a big deal except for the fact that this felt like a breakup. Your head and heart was treating this like you were in a relationship and he made it painfully clear that you weren’t.

It was quiet in your apartment. The television was off, the radio was silent, the heater had paused and even the refrigerator wasn’t making the usual silent buzz noise it made. The deafness of it all allowed the conversation you heard friday night play over and over again through your ached head.

Friday 11:37 pm.

“So Reid...” you picked up your phone when it rang and read Spencer’s name across the screen. It wasn’t like him to call so late but you picked up anyway. When it was a muffled Morgan’s voice you heard instead of Spencer’s you realized he hadn’t even meant to call you at all.

“How’s your girlfriend?”

You just knew all eyes were on him. Spencer Reid was very private about his social life. It was rare he even told you about anything he’d been up to. He just wasn’t one for small talk. The fact that you just knew they were talking about you made you press your phone harder into your ear even though you weren’t even sure you should have been listening.

“Oh y/n? Yeah she’s definitely not my girlfriend.”

This stung. There wasn’t even a label or anything that you guys put on it, but usually when Spencer would talk about his romantic relationships he’d get nervous and stuttery and try to change the subject. Spencer’s voice was clear and steady. Zero hints of nervousness and bashfulness. He was serious.

“Really?” This was Emily now, you could recognize her voice. “You guys seem like pretty close friends if you know what I mean.” Her tone was laced with humor but Spencer’s was far from joking.

“No. I wouldn’t call us friends either. She’s just someone I visit. Like y’know...how you would a grandmother.”

A grandmother? He compared you to a grandmother? He said visiting you was like visiting a grandmother?? You could feel the tears in your eyes. You really thought Spencer was a good guy. Why would he say something so rude? Something so hurtful about the person he was sleeping with.

It wasn’t a friends with benefits. You guys had agreed on that, but you weren’t dating either. You had met him at a museum and ever since then you two had behaved as if a couple would. The only difference was that you weren’t public. You weren’t posting pictures, or gushing over how cute you thought your “boyfriend” was to your friends. And you were fine with that. Labels are constricting. You were glad not to have them except when he decided to say he barely knew you at all and compared you to a grandmother.

“Damn.” Morgan sounded impressed. “Does she know that?”

“Maybe.” Spencer paused. “There’s nothing really romantic about our relationship. To be honest, she can be a bit needy at times and it’s suffocating.”

He paused again.

“I’m actually thinking of breaking things off. She wants more and I just don’t like her that way.”

Sorry, I'm not sorry if it hurts. I don’t mean to make it worse.

This is where you hung up. Your tears never stopped flowing. How dare he? How dare he say you were needy and suffocating? You rarely asked him for anything, and didn’t bother him with things at all. You knew he was a busy person. A busy and hardworking person. You never tried to ask him for more than he was willing to give. Ever. It hurt your heart to think he was playing you the whole time.

It hurt to think that all the “I adore you’s” and “I think I’m in love with you’s” were all fake. You were pretty sure with the way things were headed that you and Spencer would have much more than just a relationship. Much more than sex and cuddles. But a meaning - an understanding.

Spencer was your comfort. Your safe place. The person you’d go to if you were hurting, or in trouble. You were his. Countless times he came to your house and cried to you about the stress from his job. He’d hold you and tell you all about his day and what more he wished he could have done.

You’d buy him his favorite food and he’d cuddle you to sleep only to wake you up in the morning with kisses and great morning sex. To hear all of that meant basically nothing to him tore your heart to pieces.

It made you want to throw up. Had you wasted your time? Had he felt this way the entire time and you just never noticed because you hoped he felt the same? Were there signs that you missed? Something you could have done to prevent yourself from falling this hard for someone who didn’t care?

But you thought he cared.

Spencer was the most caring, empathetic person you’d ever met in your life. He was so understanding in a way no one could ever get.

I've decided that I'm not your fucking friend.

This is why you thought that maybe this is why he tried to hide you. Maybe he just was afraid of his friends not liking you, or afraid of someone from where he worked would try to hurt you. You prayed this was the case. You hoped and cried that this was the reason he’d ever let those words leave his mouth.

The reason you couldn’t believe this though is something understandable.

He had never, ever, called you anything other than his friend, and never wanted to go out.

He told you it was because he was protecting you, but he never wanted to even meet your friends. And when you talked about a guy or introduced him to one, he’d get upset and say something like, “Yeah well he seems perfect for you anyway. Not like we’re a thing - do what you want.”

And your brain tried to rationalize this as protection. The more you thought about it the more the other part of your brain screamed manipulation. You tried to ignore it but is that what was happening? Had he been manipulating you the entire time and you just never knew it?

If he was protecting you he wouldn’t call you needy. He wouldn’t not even bother to look at your friends. He wouldn’t feel the need to hide you from the entire world and lie about it in such a - douchebag way.

This hurt you though. His team can call out a liar faster than anyone and they would have said something if they thought he was lying. They would have defended you. The wouldn’t have egged him away and joked about you like you were some embarrassing one night stand.

You expected respect and decency and got dishonesty and asshole attitudes instead.

After the weekend of pitying yourself you realized you needed to stop. This wasn’t your fault. He has issues of his own. Issues he needs to work out and come to terms with on his own. Why should you feel anything for a man trying to hide you? Lying to you? Lying to his friends ABOUT you. Reassuring yourself helped but didn’t help the ache in your heart.

Were you ready for this? Were you ready to throw it all away? After all it could just be a misunderstanding. A misinterpretation. It could be your fault. Maybe you were clingy.

No.

No. Absolutely not. You weren’t going to try to defend his actions.

Right now, there's not much that we agree on. Sit down, if you need someone to lean on.

You called him.

“Hello?” he answered right away. “Where have you been are you okay? I was gonna come over and check.”

“Don’t come over.” You cleared your throat and blinked away tears.

“Then please come to mine. I have to talk to you, I missed you.”

He still has no idea. He doesn’t have a clue what you overheard on the phone. All the pieces of the puzzle you put together. All that you’ve realized in the past 3 days.

You rolled your eyes. Any other day you’d think his obliviousness was adorable but right now it only made you want to punch him in his stomach for lying to you and wasting your time.

“I’ll be over to give you your things.”

And you hung up.

That was so hard for you to do and you had hot wet tears running down your face to prove it. No matter how many times you tried to brush them away they just kept on going down.

Fuck him.

A shower and a change of clothes later you were finally ready to see him.

Honest, if I'm coming to your place, it's to say it to your face...

In your car you tried to talk yourself out of it. You told yourself to just forget the phone call over happened and just go back to the way things were. At least you here happy then...at least...sort of. You were okay. You were happy with him. The time you spent with him was enjoyable but you were tired of being his therapist. You were tired of being his dirty mistress. You didn’t want to be lied to or lied about. You were over it.

When you got there he rushed you in the house and looked down at you confusingly.

You had never been inside his place. The only time you were ever really here was when you were inside waiting in the car so that he could change his shirt.

“I thought you were coming tomorrow?”

“I came now to give you your things.”

“JJ will be here soon, you should probably leave. Why did you bring this stuff?”

“They’re yours. They shouldn’t be at my place.”

He looked confused but took the box from your hands anyway.

“I’m leaving.” You simply said and turned towards the door. The sooner you were out the better.

“Can I at least have a kiss?” Spencer asked in the cute voice he knew you liked.

You closed your eyes. “Sorry Reid, but no. I don’t want to seem needy or suffocating, ya’know? Makes it easier to break things off.”

Color drained from his face as he realized what you were talking about. He couldn’t even come up with an excuse other than a - “No, baby I -“

You put your palm in the air facing him telling him to stop.

“It’s okay. I was just someone you visited...like a grandmother. You shouldn’t miss me too much. We’re not even friends, right?”

You walked out of the house.

You walked out on him. Your heart was beating out of your chest. He was always the one to leave. He was always the one to say goodbye.

I've decided that I'm not your fucking friend.

—————————————-#————————————

taglist: @hotchsbabygirl @pinkdiamond1016 @thefemalestorywriter @sizzlingclamturtlesludge @samyilf123

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earlgreymon · 3 years ago

Text

sunkissed love; a taiora playlist for lovers who love each other like the sun radiates the earth. (youtube / spotify)

01. wonder - shawn mendes i wonder what it's like to be loved by you 02. used to you - mxmtoon say your feelings to me so i won't overthink mine 03. you're the best thing about me - u2 i'm the kind of the trouble that you enjoy 04. beautiful to me - olly murs you're so amazing, don't you know? 05. thunder - boys like girls your voice was the soundtrack of my summer; so bring on the rain and bring on the thunder 06. she is love (full band version) - parachute i've been beaten down, i've been kicked around, but she takes it all for me 07. built to last - mêlée 'cause you are the sun in my universe 08. best friend - rex orange county i still wanna be your favorite boy 09. give me a try - the wombats we could be gigantic, this could be worth the risk bonus track: i love you - billie eilish you didn't mean to say "i love you"; i don't want to, but i love you...

part 3 of lovers in japan series track-by-track commentaries;

IT'S TAIORA TIMEEEEE!!

honestly i want to keep this on my draft a little longer (*cough* maybe i can save it for taiora week *cough*), but @dutchforstrangers gave me some encouragement to let this out a bit faster... so here it is.

remember when i said on my koukari mixtape that my playlists are gonna be messy in terms of the storyline? well, this is the messiest. i think i kind of overthink this playlist because i want it to be perfect. it's my ultimate otp after all. i really hope this turns good.

two of the songs are already included in @patamonn's mixtape post, which you should all check it because bree's works are awesome. aside lynn, i want to dedicate this playlist to my sora sister @sorasfishing! i hope you keep thriving in anything you do and don't forget to get some rest :D (although this playlist is more up to beat and not really suitable for leisure time lmao) (well, taiora's the kind of couple who's full of spirit anyway)

01. wonder - shawn mendes

i was struggling to find a way to start this playlist. most songs i had gathered somehow would sound better if i put them in the middle. this song suddenly appeared on my suggestions and i remembered the first time this was released, i... didn't really like it lmao.

but now i love it so much. the music is majestic and very... taichi-like, if i can put it that way. the last beat of the drums sounds adventurous and seems like a good prologue for a journey ahead.

and yeah, what better way to start other than our main guy wondering what it's like to be loved by the beautiful lady who owns the sky?

02. used to you - mxmtoons

i was thinking of two mxmtoons songs for the playlist: either this song, or falling for u. although falling for u sounds more fitted to the theme of "realising you have feelings for your best friend but too afraid to tell him" (you should totally listen and check the lyrics here), i settled on used to you because of two reasons. first, the music of falling for u is too cozy for this rather rock playlist.

second, for me, used to you has a more... personal touch? i mean i can put falling for u for a takari playlist and it'll still be a good fit, but used to you is more of a taiora song. in the official commentary, the song is told to be about the turbulence of a new relationship. but in my point of view, this could be about how sora became too used to taichi's presence.

the first verse is somewhat a description of sora's insecurity. as she grew up, she wanted to become a better part of society (that was why she turned to tennis, dressing more femininely...). this kind of thought is a bit overwhelming, and knowing sora, of course she would overthink them. since 02 did taiora very dirty we never knew how taichi really felt about these changes and i am pretty sure that sora actually wanted to know his opinion because he knew her the best.

move on to the chorus: "i've been spending all my time, sitting by the phone just waiting for a call. i used to wanna be alone 'til your name was in my phone, now i'm getting kinda used to you." look, i still believe that sora's an introvert. but if taichi called her, she'd be there in a heart beat. (also, think about that scene in tri where she got so stressed with taichi informing his soccer game a little too late. bet she'd been waiting for him to invite her from the very beginning.)

03. you're the best thing about me - u2

this is just a general love song, but the line "i'm the kind of trouble that you enjoy" is very cheeky i can imagine taichi saying it to sora with so much confidence.

04. beautiful to me - olly murs

if you're listening to this playlist on spotify, i will kindly suggest you to switch momentarily to youtube because for this specific song, you have to watch the music video so you can get a more taiora vibe.

the video is about two childhood friends that always there for each other but never really talks about the feeling until one of them is almost getting married. get it? (although yeah, the girl is more of a badass than sora and the boy is too aloof as taichi's counterpart.)

the song itself is just the singer trying to convince the girl that she is beautiful no matter what. i always feel like sora has a lack of confidence about herself, so this is taichi pulling her into a realisation.

05. thunder - boys like girls

this is a tribute to our war game (a.k.a. THE PEAK OF TAIORA CINEMATIC UNIVERSE), especially the dub version with that "you say you love thunderstorm." i think when you look at the chorus of this song, you'll get it why i put the song here.

06. she is love - parachute

i have to choose the full band version because the og version is too slow. the title seems to be... a description of sora? i mean she IS love, right? :p but yeah, i think this song is an illustration on how sora will still take taichi despite his recklessness.

spoiler alert: one of my digiweek submission will be taiora with this song :p

07. built to last - mêlée

i was in doubt whether i had to put this song on this playlist, but the line "you are the sun in my universe" convinced me. also, "all of our friends saw from the start, so why didn't we believe it too?"!? gee. everyone saw it, you two. you are meant to last indeed.

08. best friend - rex orange county

okay, this is the part where everything gets a bit... bittersweet.

picture this: sora gets a boyfriend. idc who the boyfriend is, but it's definitely not taichi. this is the perfect song because taichi will surely regret why he didn't confess to sora earlier. still, he wants to be her favourite boy no matter what. even the part when the singer says "but i still wanna break your heart and make you cry" is just taichi's way of joking.

09. give me a try - the wombats

this is actually my favourite song on the playlist and funnily, i found this song accidentally when i first built this mixtape. we can ignore a rather "miserable side" of this song and just take this song as taichi's way of convincing sora that they could be such a fantastic pair together.

also, on a separate note, there's a long distance relationship theme implied in this song. i never really explore this theme, but i always wonder how married!taiora will make their marriage work because taichi will surely travel a lot with his job as diplomat.

bonus tracks: i love you - billie eilish

it took a long time for me to finally decide to put this song. i want the closure to be very slow and solemn, because most of the songs in this playlist have been very upbeat. i realised that most songs are in taichi's pov, so i thought about searching a song from sora's pov.

i was thinking about gabrielle aplin's please don't say you love me. however, the tempo was still too fast somehow, and i got the impression that the girl in the song wouldn't let the relationship between her and this particular man to be more than just friends. and there's no way i let this playlist to end like that. enough with taiora not being canon.

this billie eilish song should be listen as a company to two other songs, and if you listen to all of them together, it's actually a pretty depressing storyline (maybe triggering, so i suggest not to google if you don't feel comfortable). however, if you listen to i love you as a stand-alone song, i think it can still be a good fit.

quoting from one source, this is a song about "something that happened near the beginning of a romantic relationship, but a little bit after a friendship." i think this song can be interpreted as sora's reaction when taichi finally CAME TO HIS SENSE confessed to her. her first thought would be he was joking ("maybe won't you take it back? say you were tryna make me laugh"). sora's the type who concealed her emotion, so to hear the words as blatant as "i love you" would make her very vulnerable.

yet the song ends with a realisation that she also loved him. and that is why i put an ellipsis on the lyrics above: i want to leave my playlist for an open ending!

(but if it were up to me, i'll surely put a happy ending for them ;>)

#digimon #by me #digimusic #digiloversinjapan #don't forget to check the koukari and mimato version!#man i really can't hold it back when it comes to taiora #taichi yagami #sora takenouchi #taiora #thank god for taiora

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youalexturnermeon · 4 years ago

Text

Warm Beer and Cold Women Pt.3 (Johnny Lawrence x Reader)

Part 1

Part 2

Request: Hi! I absolutely love your work and I was wondering if I could get a Cobra Kai Johnny imagine where the reader is a bartender and starts crushing on him since he’s a regular and he flirts with her all the time and she pretends to hate it but she actually loves it? by Anon

A/N: Before you read you should know that I adjusted the timeline a little, all mistakes in the timeline that you are noticing are on purpose. Also I decided to let johnny keep his black Cobra Kai car in that one. Then I’m perfectly aware of the fact that I lowkey drifted away from the actual request but don’t worry, I’m coming back to that. It’s the second last part to this little series. Enjoy.

Warnings: badass reader, drinking, DUI, swearing, ANGST, a little fluff

Wordcount: 2650

"Jesus Christ, (Y/N), thank god you're finally here!" was the first thing you heard from Jenny as soon as you set foot into the bar for yet another late shift on a boring Thursday night.

"We've been waiting for you for hours!" Jenny said and grabbed your arm dragging you further inside. You were staggered, "What the fuck, Jen, I'm not even late, I know I was yesterday but I'm perfectly on time today! Look," you pointed towards a clock on the wall "8 pm sharp."

"Jesus, don't you ever check your phone?" she went on ignoring you. And as a matter of fact, you didn't. You trashed it a couple of days ago as a result of a drunk rage after another shift without your favourite regular. That's why you've been borrowing your colleague’s phone to call yourself an Uber home. But that was still not helping you understand why you were needed so much. Apparently, the bar was waiting for your arrival since the opening at last. In the distance, behind the almost empty counter you saw the staff door opening and Kenny making his way to you in a quick pace.

"She's is here!" Jenny called out to him as if he wasn't able to see that for himself.

"Finally."

"What the fuck?" you asked again, trying to think of all the things you could've done wrong in the past weeks, but you couldn't find any. You never messed up a drink, you always locked the doors, you even cleaned the puke in the men's bathroom. "Am I in trouble?"

Kenny shook his head, you looked at him quizzically.

"It's about your boyfriend," Jenny helped him out answering. You almost blurted out 'He's not my boyfriend' as it was already on the tip of your tongue because you were so deeply conditioned to say that. But when your glance skipped over the almost empty seats by the counter again, your heart suddenly skipped a beat and when it was back at keeping you alive it started beating so hard against your ribs as if it was about to burst. Johnny was back.

"He's been here since we opened at 5," Kenny said, sounding a little annoyed "He's drunk off his ass, came in drunk already, and refuses to leave until he sees you. We tried to throw him out but he's one persistent motherfucker and lowkey aggressive, muttering your name saying he needs to talk to you and nobody else."

"Yeah, maybe you should go and talk to him" Jenny affirmed. But you were already on your way. Without a word you almost stormed over.

At first you wouldn't have noticed him. He didn't look like himself, sitting there on his regular seat at the end, head hanging, covered by his hands. He looked rough.

The two weeks he didn't show himself, you almost started hating him. You thought him to be like any other man on earth who, after they broke you, finally got you to get soft towards them, waking your interest after hundreds of times trying, just disappeared without a trace. First you were blaming yourself, asking yourself if you went too far with your little game of pretend, whilst still waiting every day for him. Had it been too much for him saving you the other day and getting his face bashed in for you? You wished he'd come and tell you what a bitch he thought you were to your face. Then you despised him for giving you up so quickly. But as soon as you laid eyes on him all these negative thoughts disappeared, and you were just concerned. Concerned about his condition, only the question inside your head how on earth you, a simple barkeeper, were able to help him with that. You grabbed a bottle of whisky and simply headed to the other side of the counter, not standing in front but sitting next to him this time. The worst about it, he didn't even take notice of you at first.

"Johnny," you said softly placing a hand on his arm. Like being electrocuted by this touch, he winced but finally looked up. You almost gasped at his appearance. Normally he was always clean shaven, now he looked like hadn't shaved in days. Besides that, he was also hurt. At first you thought his injuries might still be from his encounter with the three men that were bothering you, but the scratches and bruises were fresh, and a band aid was sticking to his forehead that wasn't needed before. Johnny blankly stared at you from his bloodshot eyes and you suddenly felt the urge to hug him. But you resisted, first you had to get him to talk. Instead, you grabbed two of the glasses in front of Johnny uncorked the bottle of whisky and poured you one. You took a sip of the burning liquid hoping for some courage to miraculously appear as you watched Johnny silently drinking, too.

Kenny walked by on the way back to his office, judgingly eyeing you.

"Damn, I have to start taking all the booze you're drinking here from your paycheck, (Y/N), slow the fuck down, would you?" he said sighing with one foot already inside. Out of a sudden Johnny snapped.

"Jesus Kenny, don't wet your precious leather pants," he shouted out, slamming his glass on the counter "I'm gonna pay for it! Let a girl enjoy her drink for once" Some heads turned in your direction.

You held still for a second and didn't dare to breathe, afraid of another fight to happen since normally Kenny didn't allow anybody talk to him like that. But he simply shook his head and closed the door behind him, muttering something like "This girl actually has to work here, but whatever" leaving you alone with Johnny.

"You look hot, as always," he said trying to smile, yet the smile didn't reach his sad eyes. He almost looked like he's been crying.

"And you look like shit."

"You mean that?" he gestured at his face noticing your gaze upon his massive black eye. You nodded.

"That's nothing."

"What happened, Johnny?" you asked but he did not answer and just kept on sitting in silence, sipping his drink from time to time. Then, after what seemed like forever, he finally looked you straight in the eyes.

"I fucked up, (Y/N), that's what happened, I fucked up big time."

"Tell me!"

"As if you give two shits about it, you probably wouldn't care. You fucking despise me and my sorry ass."

"I do care!"

“Nah, you wouldn’t!”

You sprung off your seat, you did not expect that coming out of his mouth, also it hurt to hear him say that, because you really did care about him! You probably cared about him more than anything in your life at the moment. But if he was going to be a bitch to you so were you.

“Well, don’t waste my fucking time then!” you exclaimed “And stop annoying everyone that you need to see talk to me instead of fucking off. I can gladly leave you all by yourself so you can keep on pitying yourself. Nice seeing you, jerk!”

And you were about to storm off, go back to pretending to work just like you did every other day when there was nothing else to do, when you instantly heard a “(Y/N), wait!”

You turned around and saw Johnny, now more miserable than ever, showing at your seat inviting you to sit back down. You swallowed your pride and did so.

“I’m sorry,” he said “I just can’t believe that someone would actually give a shit about me at all. And I did want to talk to you, I still do. You’re the only one I want to see right now.” “Then tell me what’s going on.”

“There’s this kid,” he started sighed and stopped, then took another sip of his whisky and began again “I have a dojo in a strip mall, I’m a sensei,” “What’s that?” you blurted out before you could stop yourself and you felt stupid. Johnny looked at you, completely staggered, forgetting his pain for a moment. Proving you that it was in fact a probably very stupid question.

“It’s a Karate place, I teach Karate there.”

“Go on.”

“I have a shit ton of nerds that I teach but they’re mostly good kids, they got bullied a lot before, but I helped them, I showed them how to kick ass, so no one dares to fuck with them anymore. There’s this one kid, Miguel, I’ve been teaching him since the beginning, he actually gave me the idea to open a dojo, he begged me to and he’s a great kid, he really grew on me. He lives next door with his mom and grandma, they’re great people, Mexicans. I even learned a bit of Spanish from them. And I’ve been hanging out a lot with him lately. I really, really liked him.”

He rubbed his eyes and stopped talking.

“What do you mean you liked him?” you asked carefully and studied Johnny’s face that he covered with his hands again.

“There’s more to the story. There’s another dojo in town, fucking Miyagi-Do. Of course, you can’t expect only one dojo to be there in L.A but how I wish that at least that one wouldn’t exist. The sensei is a twat. I fucking hate this guy. And his kids started fighting with my kids at school and not like throwing some punches at each other and leaving it be after somebody starts crying. No, they started a fucking Karate War at school. I mean, I get it, when I was their age I also took Karate way too seriously but letting it go this far? I don’t know, I can’t really understand that. It got out of hand real quick two weeks ago.”

“Fuck, did something bad happen?” you wondered and poured yourself and Johnny another whisky.

He nodded and stared into the distance. You waited for him to answer.

“There was a fight two weeks ago and apparently it got really bad. Miguel got kicked off a balcony at school, he fell two stories deep, spine-first onto a handrail.” You gasped. You school also had problems with fighting, a lot to be precise but as far as you knew, no one got kicked off from somewhere.

“He’s been in a coma now for two weeks and they say that the chances of waking up from a coma after two weeks are pretty miserable. He might as well be dead by now.”

“It’s gonna be fine,” you said although not knowing shit about coma, you just wanted t comfort Johnny. You could not stand seeing him so broken you even wished he would go back to his old nature again, hitting on you, joking and just having a good time “He’s probably going to wake up soon and go back to Karate again.”

“You don’t know that!” Johnny said raising his voice, “He broke his fucking spine, (Y/N), even if he wakes up, he’s probably going to be crippled for his whole life.”

He took a deep breath and drank his whisky at once, grunting at the burning feeling in his throat.

“And now my own kid is in fucking juvie for kicking Miguel of a railing and he won’t even talk to me!”

“Wait, you have a kid?” you wondered and stared at Johnny wide-eyed, not knowing what else to say, this was surely a surprise for you. And Johnny went on with his rant.

“Yeah, Robby, he’s 17. But that doesn’t matter now, does it? He’s locked up, doesn’t want to hear a word from me, but that’s okay,” his voice was cynical, you could hear how much despised himself right in the moment and it was painful to see.

“I’ve been a shit father anyways, right? Every single day of his life I’ve been failing him. I wasn’t around much. I did nothing to keep him out of trouble. If so, I only made it worse, I only pushed him to train with Miyagi-Do and what happened to Miguel is all on me.” Despite calming himself down with a drink, Johnny’s voice got louder with every word he spoke. Again, heads were turning towards you, but you didn’t care.

“It’s not your fault what happened,” you said calmly and placed a hand on his shoulder, he was so tensed that you might as well have been touching a stone. And Johnny shook your hand of and let out a hateful laugh.

“Not my fault?” he shouted his lungs out “Who else’s fault is it then? Of course, it is mine. It is all on me, I fucked up. I fucked up both Robby’s and Miguel’s lives and on top of that mine’s not that great either. I spent the night in a fucking cell.”

“Calm down, Johnny,” you said softly and finally went in for a hug “It’s going to be okay; I promise!”

“No, it’s not!” he yelled as you wrapped your arms around him tightly pressing yourself against his trembling chest. At first, he let his arms sink and didn’t do anything, he kept on shouting, making even more heads turn towards all the noise, but then suddenly he buried his scrubby face into crook of your neck and sighed, finally placing his hands on your back, finally relaxing, firmly embracing you. You could’ve stayed like that for ever.

“C’mon, (Y/N), get him out of here!”, you suddenly heard Kenny who stood there, arms crossed, watching you, “He’s scaring off the people.”

You released Johnny from your hold who went back to staring down the counter whilst burying his face in his rough hands, just the way you have found him.

“Yeah, alright, I’ll bring him home.”

“Yeah, sure, feel free to come back to work whenever you’re ready, no rush. Or maybe you want to do home office instead?” said Kenny sarcastically and you rolled your eyes.

“C’mon Kenny, I can’t let him go home like this alone, he’ll kill himself on the way. Besides, he’s probably the reason this place still hasn’t gone bankrupt. And I’m the reason he keeps coming, so maybe we owe him that?”

The big biker in front of you didn’t look too happy but he knew you were right, still, he wasn’t that easy to convince.

“Come on,” you said putting on your best puppy eyes, trying to look all cute because you knew the old man liked you deep inside “I’ll do double shift tomorrow, I promise. But just please let me go.”

Kenny stood motionless.

“Please?”

“Alright, alright, I’ll cover for you. But if you don’t come in early tomorrow…” “I know, I know, you’ll fire me” you finished his sentence and smiled at him.

Then you nudged Johnny who was not getting any of the conversation you just had and told him about your plan about getting him home. He stood up and he clearly wasn’t very strong on his feet. He was swaying from side to side on the way out.

“Okay, give me your keys, Johnny,” you said when you arrived at his black dodge. Normally you would have made fun of the yellow stripes and snakes all over, but you weren’t in the mood for it.

“I think I remember you telling me that you don’t have a license anymore and that you’re not willing to get involved into DUIs anymore.” And yet he submissively handed you over his car keys. You shrugged and got in the car, waiting for him to take the shotgun seat.

“I guess we all have to make exceptions sometimes. Now concentrate and lead me the way.”

“Thank you” Johnny said, his voice now all raspy and he suddenly looked tired “Now you are saving my ass.”

**************************************************************************************

PART 4

Already working on part 4 whether you like it or not, I’m too invested in that one

Sorry to all waiting for their requests to be written, I’ll soon be on it

Thanks for reading!

Taglist: @lililolli (you want to be on the taglist, too? drop me a message)

#johnny lawrence #johnny lawrence x reader #johnny lawrence imagine #johnny lawrence x you #cobra kai #cobra kai imagine #johnny lawrence angst #johnny lawrence fluff #karate kid #karate kid imagine #billy zabka #william zabka

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margarethelstone-2 · 3 years ago

Text

if I loved you less (i might talk about it more)

requested by one and only @nerdypanda3126. thanks so much!

Read on AO3!

"Taichi... You still like me, don't you?"

The young man in question raised his eyes from the book he'd been trying to read for the past quarter, and fixed them on Chihaya, confused. It wasn't just the question that surprised him, even though its content sure would have been enough to puzzle a better prepared soul.

The fact that Chihaya had barely spoken at all for most of their time together today was the main reason why he felt startled by her words now.

She really had been quiet for most of the day, even though they were spending it at his place, determined, as she herself had claimed, not to get in the way of his studies. Taichi had tried to make her realise that it wasn't what he wanted at all, that the very reason he'd invited her over was to get a break from all the reading and just relax a little. He'd explained over and over again that he needed her to be a distraction; tried – unsuccessfully – to get it into her head that she was actually doing him a favour. He knew how much of a workaholic he could be and so he specifically planned the visit as a means to enforce the necessary break he might not have taken otherwise.

He had told her all of that. And yet, she'd remained quiet.

All the way until now, that is.

And just what on earth was she going on about?

"What's with that question? You know the answer to that," he replied casually, almost dismissively, before going back to the textbook in his hand. He really had no idea what had gotten into her all of the sudden, but then again, he didn't care to delve on the subject. He knew she'd tell him anyway.

"I was just wondering," she answered, a trace of hurt ringing in her voice; Taichi needed to hold back the smile that sprang on his lips at the sight of her pout. "Is it so bad if I do?"

Taichi hummed in thought.

"Is that why you've been so quiet all day?" he asked right after. "You've been just busy considering my possible affection for you?"

"Stop with the mockery. I'm thinking of it seriously."

"Oh? And what conclusions did you come to?"

"I wouldn't have asked if I'd come to any."

He had no choice but to close the book and put it away after a statement he'd just heard. Not that he minded. Throwing it on the floor rather carelessly, he sat up straight in his corner of the couch and, resting his chin on his palm, he fixed his gaze on the girl seated by his desk on the other side of the room.

She really was being impossible today.

Well, he supposed that wasn't anything new. He'd known Chihaya long and well enough to not be fazed by the swings in her mood or the inane schemes she so often came up with. He had learnt to expect the unexpected, every day, every hour of his otherwise boring life, because that was obviously the only way to keep up with her. The one thing he had to keep doing if he still wanted to be a part of her life.

Because that was how Ayase Chihaya was.

Chihaya. His best friend. His fiercest karuta rival. The girl he'd been in love with since fourth grade of primary school and the girl who'd rejected him straightforwardly at the very beginning of their third year in Mizusawa High. The girl whom he'd thought he could never win over, on whom he'd given up again and again, fooling himself he could move on and blight the love he'd had for her since he'd been a ten year old squirt.

He sighed and shook his head, remembering her question from a moment before.

She knew damn well he was still head over heels for her.

She was his girlfriend, for sanity's sake.

"I can't believe you actually have asked, you know," he picked up with the same fake weariness he'd shown before, if only to cover his growing amusement. Seeing her very real anxiety made him assume a more solemn expression, as he asked, "Seriously, what brought this on? Are you mad about something?"

"I'm not mad," she disagreed instantly, and with good emphasis.

"Are you unhappy then? Did I do something to make you feel like that?"

Again, she denied. Now she just looked sad. "That's not it."

Wrong. She was flustered.

"Then what is it?" Taichi asked, as gently and warmly as he could. Not for the first time, he felt grateful for all the hard training his patience had received. It was obvious that Chihaya needed that from him now. "It's not like I could get over you like this, you of all people should be aware of that. You're the most important person in my life. The best companion I could think of. You know I get lonely and grumpy when I can't see you, and you know I still get absurdly jealous, even though I hate being so. And so I can't help but think there's something else I'm not doing right."

Taichi stopped there, waiting for her to, if not answer his question, then to contradict him in one way or another, at least. After all, he really was at a loss.

He thought he'd been doing a fairly good job as a boyfriend, when all was said and done. He'd already shared Chihaya's most important interest and it wasn't difficult to at least understand the new ones she'd found. He made sure to be there for her when she needed him, and tried his best to give her space when she needed that more. True, he'd had some trouble coming for help on his part, but even that was a thing of a past rather than present – certainly not something that could shock Chihaya into thinking like this.

He would think that the all-day-long date he'd come up with and seen through in celebration of their first anniversary as a couple last week was a good show of how much he still cared.

He wasn't perfect. Neither was she. But never in his life would he have thought that he'd failed to get his feelings across.

"Chihaya," he prompted once more, his voice audibly quieter. "Please tell me what it is. I can't fix it if I don't know what's broken."

She looked up from the floor she'd been glaring at for a while and met his gaze, a shadow of unease still clouding her big brown eyes. She opened her mouth to answer; she closed it instantly and looked away again, abashed. There was a hint of pink on her cheeks, and it only grew darker as the time passed, though whether it was because of embarrassment or something more alarming, Taichi couldn't tell yet.

"Chihaya–"

"It's because you never say it."

He supposed his eyes opened wider than ever, what's with the utter astonishment he felt growing inside him immediately. For a few moments, he could do nothing but stare, the craziness of the situation overwhelming enough to successfully prevent him from forming a sensible thought, and much less coming up with any kind of solution. One look at Chihaya was enough to sober him up, however.

She was distressed. She was insecure.

No matter how stupid he thought the reason to be, he could hardly allow the situation to last.

With a groan that was bound to startle her, he bent over and buried his face in his hands.

Only one thing he could do now.

"Come here," he said, his face still hidden behind one hand as he tore the other one away and beckoned her towards him. "No excuses. You'll talk later. Now just come here, please."

She did, albeit tentatively, as if afraid of the reaction he might show her. With his patience starting to run thin at last, Taichi didn't wait for her to cover the whole distance, instead reaching out and grabbing her by the wrist, only to pull her down on the couch right next to him.

And then he pulled her even closer, locking her in a bone-crushing hug.

"I'm gonna do something to you," he mumbled into her hair, his voice a mixture of laughter and complaint. "You cruel, cruel, woman. Have you no heart? Here I am, mind reeling as I try to figure out what the hell I did wrong again and you say it's because I don't say I like you enough. As if you didn't already know you've got a firmer hold of my heart than I ever did. Tell me, am I really this bad at showing you that I care that you doubt it?"

It was Chihaya's turn to growl at him, though it surely – and fortunately – didn't stop her from burying her face even deeper into his chest and digging her fingers into the shirt on his back. Again, Taichi laughed at the display, but didn't loosen his grip one bit.

That silly, unbelievable, most beloved girl.

"This and that are different things," she muttered finally in response against his buttons, her stubborn indignation probably being the only reason why he could discern the words at all. "There are different kinds of love languages. We even talked about it, you know."

"Yes. And as far as I remember, we've already established that neither of us cared for this one. So your argument doesn't work."

Well, this was a lie, or at least, it wasn’t fully true. After all, he could never get tired of hearing her say those words, to him and him only. But he didn't need it that much, not when he already knew of so many other ways in which Chihaya expressed her love towards him. He'd always assumed it was the same for her, too.

Funnily enough, he still didn't think he was mistaken.

"I've had feelings for you for the past fourteen years, you dummy, I wouldn't change my mind just because you decided to return them," he threw in only half-jokingly, as if to make sure he got his point across before moving onto the next part. "So? Care to tell me what's the source of it all?"

He felt her tense against him for a split second, only to relax in the next moment with a long, weary sigh. He waited for her to make herself comfortable in his arms, shifting ever so slightly to make it easier for them both. And then he heard her speak.

"I met up with Kana-chan the other day," she admitted weakly. "Her and Desktomu. And I guess... They're always so sweet with one another, now more than ever. I suppose... It made me feel a little jealous. But most of all, it just made me think."

"And you decided that I'd fallen out of love with you, because I don't talk like Komano does?"

"I didn't decide anything, I told you already. I just wondered if maybe I was doing something wrong to deserve that treatment. Sorry for being so terribly scared of losing you again because of my own foolishness."

Words caught in his throat as Taichi tried to protest against this new development. That last addition Chihaya had made – and more importantly, the wounded, truly uncertain voice with which she'd spoken – would have been enough to melt his heart even if he had actually been angry with her. Right now, he had to hold back from grabbing her by the chin and kissing her senseless until all the idiotic ideas evaporated from her overworked mind.

The things she did to him without as much as trying.

You evil little imp.

"They're newly-weds. You can't use them for reference," he managed to stutter out at least, conveniently ignoring the hoarseness of his own voice and the emotion that hovered behind it. "Not to mention, those two are the opposite of us when it comes to talking about feelings openly. There's a reason they got together six years before we did. Just because something works for them doesn't mean it's the best course for us to take as well."

He smiled again and planted a kiss at the top of her hair, before adding, "I still can't believe you really doubted me, though."

She huffed and pulled away, although she still didn't move from her place on the couch. They were still close; close enough for Taichi to see the light reflecting in her eyes and the blush that hadn't left her cheeks, and to reach out and comb her tangled hair with his fingers. Another gesture so full of love, even though it was but a fraction of all that she made him feel.

"Well, since I never understood what had made you fall in love with me in the first place, it's only natural that I'd have this kind of doubts."

He chuckled and she smiled on her part, her obstinacy giving it to the desire to just be with him. It was another thing Taichi was able to read in her eyes – and, knowing the feeling well enough from his own experience, he had no trouble deciphering it.

Delayed, the first part of her sentence entered his brain.

What made me fall for you, I wonder?

He didn't know. It had been so long since he’d realised his feelings after all, and longer still since those feelings had been born. Even all those years earlier, he probably wouldn’t have been able to point out the reasons clearly, never mind finding the one spark that had started it – trying to do so now seemed downright impossible.

There were so many reasons, after all.

Maybe it was because she had never considered herself a possible love interest for anyone, first when she was too engrossed in karuta and later, when she thought she didn't deserve to be one. Maybe it was her hot-headedness and her drive, and how different she'd always been from him, and yet never failed to tell him how much she'd admired and envied those qualities of his that she lacked.

Maybe it was the fact that she'd always been with him, so close and so dear and yet so impossible to grasp.

Maybe it was because she'd loved him long before either of them dared believe that was the case.

Maybe...

"Maybe," he said out loud, though in fact not loud at all, his lips moving against her forehead as he leaned in to put a kiss there, too. "Maybe, if I loved you less, I might be able to talk about it more."

Edging away, Taichi saw tears gathering in her eyes. He wiped them away with his thumb, his hand cupping the side of her jaw fittingly.

And then he kissed her properly.

Just like he had wanted to ever since he'd first seen her that day.

#one-shot request #chihayafuru #taichihaya #mashima taichi #ayase chihaya #margaretwrites

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lostinthewiind · 3 years ago

Text

Brave Heart: Chapter Seventeen

Attack on Titan

Rating: Mature

Warnings: sexual themes, death, gore, mature themes, extreme violence, body horror, blood, weapons, major character death, age-gap relationship

Long green raincoats covering their ODM gear and hoods pulled up to mask their identities, Vera, Armin, Mikasa, and Eren moved through the streets with Annie as their guide.

Adjusting the straps of her pack, Vera glanced over her shoulder to make sure they weren't being followed. Every step she took, she tried to focus on keeping her head on straight, but her mind kept on wandering back to what had happened with Reiner. The things he had said kept replaying over and over again, and as they did, they brought up more questions that Vera wished she had asked when she had the chance.

"We made it," Eren said, his voice snapping Vera out of her thoughts. "I can't believe it was so easy."

"Hush," Mikasa warned.

Eren scoffed. "The Military Police hard at work. I'm almost surprised they bothered to show up at all."

"Let's just keep moving," Vera encouraged.

Eren nodded. "Hopefully they haven't noticed my stand-in yet either. It's not gonna hold up under close scrutiny. After all, Jean and I look nothing alike."

Thinking back to earlier that morning, when Jean had set out with a dark brown wig and a frown, Vera snickered lightly to herself.

"It's close enough," Armin told Eren, defending the plan he had had to come up with on such short notice. "You both have that same angry scowl and the same boulder-sized chip on your shoulder."

Vera snickered again.

"Well, yeah, but I don't have his horse face!" Eren huffed.

"Hey, so if I had refused to help you guys out, then what was your plan B for getting over the wall?" Annie asked, either because she was genuinely curious or because she wanted to put an end to Armin and Eren's bickering.

"We would have used our ODM gear to barge right through the checkpoint," Armin answered.

Annie rolled her eyes. "That's stupid. Why didn't you just avoid all this trouble in the first place? You could have escaped before reaching Stohess, right? I mean, why wait until now?"

"I felt that this town's complex layout would allow us to squeeze a bit more time out of our body-double ploy. Of course, a head-on assault is ill-advised, so as long as the convoy acts like it's following orders, then everyone keeps their defences down."

"I see." Annie contemplated Armin's words. "It's a very good plan."

As the group of five rounded the next corner, Armin's eyes lit up when he spotted what he had been looking for. "There it is!" He broke away from everyone else and ran ahead. Stopping in front of a staircase that led down into a dark tunnel, he waited for the others to catch up.

"Here?" Annie eyed the tunnel suspiciously.

"Yeah. We'll pass through here," Armin said. "It's what remains of an underground city they were planning to build way back when. And, if I'm right, it should lead us to the vicinity of the outer gate."

Eren smiled at his best friend. "Nice work, Armin. That's amazing."

With that, Vera, Armin, Mikasa, and Eren started down the stairs. Annie, however, remained hesitant and stayed at the entrance.

Noticing that they were one person short, Eren turned back to look at Annie, who still hadn't budged a single step. "Annie? What's the matter? You're not afraid of dark, cramped spaces or anything, are you?"

"So what?" Annie retorted. "So what if I am? I wouldn't expect a suicidal maniac like you to understand. You don't know what it is to be an ordinary girl, crippled with fear."

"A girl who can flip a full-grown man upside down has nothing to fear from the dark," Eren huffed. "Cut the crap and let's move!"

"No, I refuse." Annie's words stopped them all in their tracks. "I'm too afraid. Above ground, I'll help. Otherwise, the deal's off."

Gaze shifting between Annie and Armin, Vera began to wonder if they had been found out. Had Annie figured out what was actually going on, or was she really just afraid of the dark?

"Quit being stubborn, damnit!" Eren shouted. "Just get the hell down here! Move! We're running out of time, all right?!"

"Stop shouting," Mikasa warned again. "Someone will hear you."

"I'm sure it's fine, Mikasa." Annie's voice had softened and suddenly, there was no more fear detectable in her tone. "It seems that, for whatever reason, this place has been completely deserted. That hurts me. It really does. The way you're looking at me now. If I didn't know better, I'd say you didn't trust me. Hey, Armin?"

Glancing down, Vera saw that Armin had pulled out his flare gun and had concealed it behind his body, his hand shaking so badly that she was worried he was going to drop it.

"Annie . . . tell me, what were you doing with Marco's ODM gear?" Armin asked. "It had all the same dents and scrapes. See, I helped him with maintenance, so I know you used it."

"Yes." Annie didn't even attempt to deny it. "I found it. Found it and took it."

"Then, the two Titans we had in custody . . . it was you that killed them."

"No one knows." Annie shrugged. "But if you suspected all of this a month ago, why did you wait this long to say anything?"

Armin's lip quivered. "Because even now it's difficult. I just didn't want to believe that I was right, so I stayed quiet. But then . . . out in the field, the fact that you didn't kill me then and there, that's the moment that set us on the path to our current situation."

As the wind picked up, sweeping Annie's bangs and blowing leaves along the cement, Annie still had yet to move a single muscle. "Yes, we're here because I let you live. Of course, I never dreamed you'd end up cornering me like this."

"Annie, please!" Eren shouted once more. "You've taken this joke far enough! Just tell us this is some kind of horrible prank. It's not too late! Come on, we'll understand. Come down, let's talk! You can prove to us that we're mistaken by walking down these stairs. Prove we're wrong to accuse you!"

"We both know I can't." Annie shook her head slowly. "Like I told you, I don't have the constitution for it."

"Annie, stop!" Eren begged, hoping beyond hope that it wasn't true; that Annie wasn't the Female Titan. "We're talking about a matter of life and death!"

"Work with us, Annie!" Armin pleaded. "We can reason this out like human beings!"

While the boys whined, trying their best to make nothing out of something, Vera and Mikasa already knew what had to be done. They had seen what the Female Titan was capable of and, whether it was a friend of theirs or not, the atrocities they had witnessed couldn't be left unpunished.

"Enough!" Mikasa threw her jacket off to reveal her ODM gear and drew her blades. "I'm not listening to another word of this! No point."

Following in Mikasa's footsteps, Vera shed her jacket as well. "I've seen the horrors you've caused." She too held her paring blades at the ready. "This ends today."

"I'm going to carve you up again!" Mikasa threatened. "Do you understand me, Titan?"

Lifting her head to look at the others, Annie's face cracked into an uncharacteristic smile before she started laughing hysterically. "You know, Armin . . . it's nice that I could be a 'good person' for you. For now, at least, it looks like you won your bet. But I'm going to gamble too, and here's my wager!"

As Annie lifted her finger to her mouth, ready to bite down on her skin and transform into a Titan, Armin fired his flare gun. Within seconds, soldiers dressed as citizens emerged from the woodwork, surrounding Annie and tackling her to the ground.

When one of the soldiers tied a band around Annie's mouth to keep her from biting herself, she lifted her hand, revealing a silver ring that, when she activated it, released a sharp point.

Spotting the ring before anyone else, Mikasa grabbed Vera, Armin, and Eren and pulled them down the staircase with her. Before anyone above ground could escape, Annie cut her thumb along the sharp edge of the ring, and with a slurry of bright light, loud explosions, and screams of agony, she transformed into the Female Titan.

As Vera stared at the blood splatters and mutilated corpses that had shot into the tunnel upon Annie's transformation, she thought back to the meeting she and the others had had with Commander Erwin and Captain Levi when the plan for today had been laid out. During that conversation, Commander Erwin had made it all sound so simple; so seamless.

This was not how it was supposed to go.

Before Vera had much time to overthink how poorly the current situation had turned out, the Female Titan's hand reached into the tunnel entrance, punching a hole in the brick wall and causing her and the others to high tail it through the tunnel to try and escape.

"Damnit, that ring," Armin wheezed as the Titan hand reached after them. "She must have known I was lying to her from the very beginning. She knew we were leading her into a trap. I could have . . . I should have taken a different approach."

"Not much we can do about it now!" Vera glanced over her shoulder.

Mikasa nodded in agreement. "Save the 'should haves" for after we're out of this. The question now is what do we do next?"

"Okay." Armin took a minute to clear his head. "First, we rendezvous with squad three then get the hell above ground. We fight her out in the open, that means we're switching to plan B. She's all yours, Eren. Got it?"

"Yeah."

"Over here!" A Scout from squad three further up the tunnel flagged them down. "Hey, what happened? Is plan A a no-go?"

"Afraid so, yes!" Armin answered. "As of now, we're going with the backup option."

Before anyone could get another word out, the Female Titan's foot came crashing through the top of the tunnel, completely crushing the soldiers of squad three; the force of which blasted air and dust into Vera's and the others' faces.

"She caved in the ceiling." Armin sputtered, trying his best not to inhale the debris in the air.

Eren's eyes locked onto the limbs of the soldiers that were sticking out from among the rubble. "We've got to pull them out of there." He moved to help, but Mikasa stopped him.

"Eren, get back!" Mikasa dragged him away. "What was that? Does she not care if she kills you too?"

"She took a chance." Armin glared at the hole in the ceiling. "It was risky, but she gambled on Eren's being able to survive. We're dealing with someone who's been backed into a corner. She's desperate; that makes her all the more dangerous."

As Armin took off running in the other direction, Vera and the others followed. "So, how the hell do we get out of this damn tunnel then?" Vera looked around for an alternate exit.

Once the group of four had found a location that they were relatively sure they were safe from the Female Titan in, they crouched down, giving their legs and lungs a break while they figure out what to do next.

"Damn it, we're cut off." Armin laid out the facts. "If we try to get airborne with our ODM gear she'll swat us like flies. And if we-"

Armin was cut off by a loud rumbling and the entire tunnel shaking from where Annie had put her foot through the ceiling once again.

Shielding his eyes from the dust, Armin continued. "If we stay here, it's only a matter of time before we're crushed."

"I know what I have to do." Eren stood to his feet. "I'll change. I'll shield you guys just like that time with the cannon fire! Get in close!" Before either of them could disagree, Eren had pulled Vera, Armin, and Mikasa right up next to his body. "All right, brace yourselves."

Drawing his hand up to his mouth, Eren bit down hard; hard enough to draw blood. Despite this, nothing happened. "Oh, no!" Eren stared at his hand in disbelief. "Not again. Why now?"

"Eren?" Vera stepped back.

"We don't have time for this!" Eren cupped his face with his hands and dropped to his knees. "Just work, damnit!" He bit his hand again, but still, he didn't transform.

"Don't try to force it. You have to have a clear goal in mind, like Hange said," Armin told him, referring to the experimental genius of a person who had worked alongside Eren when he had first joined the Scouts. From what Vera had heard about them—since she had only seen the individual in passing and never actually met them—they were beyond eccentric but one hell of a researcher and soldier. "Come on, you can do this! We know you can!"

"Believe me, I'm trying!" Blood dripped down Eren's hand and out of the corners of his mouth as he tried to activate his Titan form over and over again.

Kneeling down next to Eren, Mikasa glared at him. "Really?" she snapped, which was an unusual way for her to address him considering she was usually doting on him. "Are you sure you're not having second thoughts? Doubts about Annie?"

Eren's eyes avoided Mikasa's gaze and that was when the truth came to light.

"It's her, the Female Titan," Mikasa reminded him. "No matter how much you don't want to believe it, that won't stop it from being true. What did we see? Back there, just now? She's a murderer. Period."

Vera nodded. "Remember what she did to Levi's squad? She crushed each and every one of them like insects."

"This isn't complicated," Mikasa told him, trying to convince him to banish his doubts about fighting Annie.

"Get off my back, damnit!" Eren cried out before biting down on his hand once more. "I'm not stalling for time!"

"Dig deep," Mikasa's voice was quiet and calm. "It's Annie. You know it is. And you know you have to fight . . . unless there's something deeper keeping you from it."

Drawing his blade suddenly, Armin's face lit up with an idea. "I know what we have to do!" he exclaimed. "Mikasa will head for that opening, at the same time, Vera and I will make a run for the exit. I'm sure Annie will go for one of us. When she does, run in the opposite direction for all you're worth!"

"Are you out of your mind?" Eren gasped as Mikasa and Vera started putting their jackets back on. "What the hell good is it gonna do if one of you gets killed?"

"If we stay here, all four of us will," Vera reasoned. "Armin's plan is good and it gives you an opening to go after the Female Titan."

Without allowing Eren to say another word on the matter, Mikasa took off in one direction while Vera and Armin went in the other. "Hope you don't mind I asked you to come with me." Armin glanced at Vera as they ran toward the light at the end of the tunnel. "Just figure if we were targeted, I'd have a better chance of survival if you were with me. Mikasa can handle herself but I'm not much of a fighter."

"Don't worry, Arlert, I'll be your guard dog," Vera smirked. "Or we'll both be crushed under Annie's giant Titan foot. Either way, we'll handle it together."

"Right." Armin nodded. "Together."

"I'm not worth it, you hear me?!" Eren called out to the others, desperation and guilt dripping from his words. "You don't have to go!"

Stopping in her tracks for but a moment, Mikasa turned to face Eren. "What choice do we have?" She exhaled slowly. "The world is a cruel place."

As Mikasa turned back around and kept running, the tunnel began to rumble, nearly throwing Vera off balance. Then, with a loud crash, the ceiling caved in, but not above her and Armin or above Mikasa. Instead, it caved in right over Eren himself.

Managing to make it to the tunnel's exit, both Vera and Armin took to the skies with their ODM gear. As soon as Mikasa made it out, she did the same. Soon, the three of them made a bee-line right toward the Female Titan.

Blades at the ready, Mikasa wasn't even phased when the Female Titan captured her in her hand. Pulling a move similar to Reiner's, Mikasa broke out with ease, severing the Titan's fingers in the process in a whirlwind of sharp metal.

While Vera assisted Mikasa in keeping the Female Titan distracted, Armin went to Eren's aid. Bleeding from the head and mouth, Eren's unconscious body lay underneath chunks of concrete and it didn't look like he would be getting up anytime soon.

Hearing Armin's desperate pleas, the Female Titan turned her attention to him and started walking over, determined to capture Eren for good this time.

"Oh, no you don't!" Vera swooped down in front of the Titan's legs and sliced at her shins while Mikasa went for the arms.

Attempting to dodge Mikasa's attack, the Titan swept her arm along the roof of a building, sending roofing tiles and chunks of concrete flying into the air; one of which collided with Mikasa mid-air and knocked her out.

Watching Mikasa's limp body lying in the street, Vera had never felt so motivated to accomplish something before in her entire life.

"Don't let her get away!" A backup squad of Scouts arrived just in time. "We have to contain her, whatever it takes!"

Unfortunately, the Scouts that had joined to help take on the Female Titan didn't put a dent in the battle at all. Annie, who seemed to know every move before it was made, grabbed the Scouts out of the air and tugged on their anchoring lines like they were puppets on a string.

While the Female Titan had her back turned to deal with another Scout, Vera took this opportunity to divebomb for her neck. Of course, she wasn't surprised in the slightest when Annie sensed her at the last second and hardened her skin, breaking Vera's blades in half.

Landing hard on an adjacent rooftop, Vera sucked wind as she replaced her blades. "You know, Annie, I can't believe there was ever a time that I slightly admired your combat skills." She stared the Titan right in the eye, hoping that Annie herself could hear what she was saying. "At first you seemed like a loose cannon, but now I can tell that you're just as predictable as the rest of us. Sooner or later, you'll slip up . . . and when you do, I'll be there."

Blasting in from around the corner, Mikasa—who had apparently come to again—used Vera's distraction to her benefit and slashed at the Female Titan's ankles.

"Annie!" Armin's voice echoed from down the street where he stood alone, paring blades at his sides. "Are you going to kill me or not? I seem to remember you making a wager; well, here's your chance to make good on it!"

While the Female Titan had its back turned once again, Jean seemingly appeared out of thin air and took another shot at the nape. Of course, his blades didn't fare too well against the hardened skin either.

"Armin, follow my lead!" Jean called, and in an instant, Armin was in the air and following him through the streets.

Confused, Vera looked from the Titan to the two disappearing boys before making chase. "What the hell are you two doing?" She caught up with ease. "Care to share the plan?"

"Just wait!" Jean answered.

As the Female Titan chased after Jean, Armin, and Vera through the streets and around corners, a sudden mechanical hiss sounded, followed by what sounded almost like gunshots, and when Vera looked back, the Titan was once again being held in place by multiple ropes and heavy-duty anchoring lines—the same strategy that had been used in the forest.

When the Female Titan tried to move forward and break free, the anchoring lines pulled her back, causing her to trip herself up and tumble to the ground. As soon as she was down, Scouts from above tossed a weighted net with spikes down onto her, effectively keeping her in place for the time being.

"Nice!" A person with brown hair pulled back into a ponytail and glasses, who Vera recognized as the mad genius Hange, stood upon one of the rooftops and stared down at their trap. "And here I was, convinced having a plan C was nothing short of paranoid. Oh, Commander Erwin, you genius."

A genuine grin spreading over her face, Vera landed on the ground next to Armin and Mikasa to watch the master at work.

"Right, so . . . do us a favour. Behave yourself." Hange lowered themself down to the ground as well before walking right up to the Female Titan's face and pointing their blade directly at her eye. "Oh, and calling your cohorts to dinner isn't an option, so let's not waste that lovely singing voice. In fact, let's not waste anything. No, no, I'm going to read you like bull entrails . . . every part of you has its own precious story to tell."

One second, the Female Titan was lying completely still, and the next, she had kicked her leg out to completely crush the wooden machines holding the anchoring lines in place.

"She broke free?!" Mikasa gasped as she and the others propelled themselves atop the nearby building before they could be crushed as well.

"Damnit, we didn't have time to set enough traps!" Hange grumbled as the Female Titan jumped to her feet and ran off, anchoring lines still attached to her skin as she pulled the wooden contraptions along with her. "Don't let her get away!"

As Vera and the others pursued the Female Titan, Mikasa tried to land hit after hit. When one of those attempts went wrong, however, and she ended up hitting the ground hard and getting tangled in her own anchoring lines, Vera stopped to help.

Before she could get down to the girl, however, an explosion erupted from a few blocks away and the entire sky turned yellow from the burst of electric light.

"Eren," Vera whispered, knowing full well that he had finally managed to transform.

The entire city shook when Eren thundered through the streets, and when he finally caught up with the Female Titan, he didn't hesitate to throw a punch so hard that it knocked her backward and into an intricately designed cathedral in the middle of the tree-covered courtyard they were standing in.

Hearing the commotion, Mikasa's eyes shot open. "Eren," she wheezed, hope filling her eyes when she caught sight of his Titan.

As the Female Titan clambered back to her feet again, the crushed bodies of the citizens she had landed on were revealed beneath her. Swerving through streets, Eren chased after Annie, the sight of the two Titans causing fear and panic to spread like wildfire.

"Well, I dare say it looks like our boy's in control of himself this time," Hange said as they, Vera, Armin, and Jean followed the Titans through the city.

"Yeah," Armin agreed. "Still though, there's no guarantee this will turn out any differently than their last meeting."

Jean let out a heavy sigh. "Come on, he wouldn't have transformed unless he knew for sure he could take her this time. He's got this, okay?"

"I don't doubt that." Armin nodded. "But determination alone isn't enough to win a fight. You of all people should know that. It'll take more than that to beat Annie. A lot more."

"Damnit!" A squad of Scouts landed upon the next roof, their eyes tracking Annie's projected path. "She's making a break for level ground. So much for our gear. What now?"

"Split into two teams and go around!" Hange ordered.

With that, Vera, Armin, Jean, and the Scout squad split up, each taking a different path around the open area that Annie and Eren were currently heading for.

As soon as both Titans reached the open layout, where they were least likely to harm people in the crossfire of their battle, they turned to one another, met gazes, and stood still, waiting for the other one to make the first move.

A screech so loud that it shattered windows ripped throat Eren's Titan's throat, and as he lunged forward, he swung. Annie blocked the attack with her hardened elbow, but when she counter-attacked with a kick, Eren blocked it as well.

Grabbing the Female Titan by the leg, Eren stood, swinging and then tossing her over an entire row of buildings before she came crashing down. Eren didn't give her even a second to recuperate though, because almost immediately he was running right through the building separating the two of them and lunging once more.

With the fight no longer contained to the open area, the civilian casualties were going to be in the hundreds if the two Titans kept using the city as their battleground.

"Section Commander, I hate to say it, but the city will be debris and corpses before long," one of Hange's men told them. "Even if we manage to catch her."

"Well, then that's how it's gonna be," Hange replied. "We're sticking to Commander Erwin's plan, got it? So stop babbling and ready the nets."

"Right!"

Before long, the city was in ruins. Smoke, fires, collapsed buildings, bodies in the street. As Vera moved along the rooftops, trying to keep up with the carnage, she spotted a little girl wandering down one of the streets, alone and with tears in her eyes.

Stopping in her tracks, Vera looked down at the girl. She had blonde hair and a beautiful blue dress, and it was obvious at first glance that she lived a lifestyle opposite to the one Vera had when she was younger. But when Vera and the girl locked eyes, and she saw the terror and panic illuminated in her teary orbs, she knew that the two of them were exactly the same.

"Hey, kid," she called down to the girl. "It's not safe out here."

The girl sniffled and wiped her tears away. "I know, but . . . but I can't find my parents."

"Let me help you," Vera told her.

The girl shook her head. "No, I'll be okay."

Vera's heart felt like it was being squeezed in a vice. Somehow, she was reliving what had happened five years ago, only now the roles were reversed and she was the one in the jacket, with the ODM gear, standing on the rooftop.

But this time, things would be different. Instead of believing the girl when she said she was okay, she knew better. "At least let me get you somewhere safe." Vera lowered herself down while the sounds of battle raged on in the background. "We wouldn't want your beautiful dress to get ruined, now would we?"

The girl shook her head once more. "N-no. It was a birthday gift from my parents."

"Oh, well, it's absolutely lovely." Vera lifted the girl into her arms and, without knowing where she was going to take the girl, started heading in the opposite direction of where Eren and Annie were.

As Titan screams echoed through the city, the girl in Vera's arms began to shake. "Am I going to die?" she asked nervously as she covered her ears with her hands.

"No, of course not," Vera assured her, her voice raised to be heard over the screaming and the fact that the girl was covering her ears. "I'm going to take you somewhere safe, okay?"

"Okay." The girl nodded and shut her eyes tight.

Vera wasn't sure how many blocks she had run already, or how many more she would have to go before she felt comfortable leaving the girl somewhere by herself. It wasn't until she rounded a corner and spotted Captain Levi standing in the middle of the street that she felt she had found somewhere safe.

"Captain Levi!" Vera ran over to him, almost not recognizing him dressed in a suit instead of his Scout uniform. "I need your help!"

Turning to face the frantic woman and little girl, Levi cocked a brow. "I am clearly not in any condition to be of much help right now." He gestured to his injured foot.

"I don't need you to fight." Vera thrust the little girl into his arms before he had a chance to protest. "I need you to keep her safe."

Levi, who only wrapped his arms around the girl to keep her from falling, glared at Vera. "Absolutely not! What do I look like to you, Kline? A babysitter?"

Looking to the girl, Vera flashed a smile. "Can you cover your ears for me again?"

Without hesitation, the girl nodded and slapped her hands over her ears once more before tucking her face into Levi's chest.

"She was wandering alone out there," Vera spoke in frantic whispers. "Her parents are probably dead. She's all alone. I just don't want her to end up . . . please, Sir, just keep her safe. I don't know where else to take her."

Levi narrowed his eyes. "Just when I think you're not half bad, you go and pull something like this."

"Please, Sir, I-"

"What were you going to say?"

Vera was so whiplashed by that sudden question that she did a double-take. "What?"

"Just now, you said, 'I just don't want her to end up' and then you stopped yourself," Levi reminded her. "End up like what, Kline? Finish the sentence."

With Levi's cold eyes staring into her, freezing her in place and causing her hairs to stand on end, she swallowed hard. "I just . . ." she hung her head. "I just don't want her to end up like me, Sir. She reminds me of myself when I was younger. That is what I was going to say."

With a curt nod, Levi tightened his arms around the girl. "I've got her. Go."

Vera felt relief wash over her. "Thank you, Sir."

Turning on her heel, Vera anchored herself to the nearest building before practically throwing herself through the city, desperate to return to the fight and forget about the girl without a guilty conscience weighing her down.

When she had located the two Titans again, Vera arrived just in time to see Eren's badly beaten Titan—with glowing red streaks running down its body—crushing the Female Titan's face in his hand. Whatever had happened while she had been gone had somehow been enough to make Eren angry enough to up his skill level.

Fighting Eren off of her, Annie hardened her Titan's fingers before making a run for the wall and attempting to climb it.

"She's headed up the wall!" Jean exclaimed.

"She's trying to escape!" Hange shouted as Eren's Titan hobbled over, one leg missing, and grabbed onto her lower half to stop her from getting away. As the Female Titan kicked Eren's Titan away, her leg ripped off in his mouth in the process. Both Titans were severely mutilated by then, but neither one was willing to give up the fight.

"No, no, no!" Armin cried out as the Female Titan got closer and closer to the top of the wall. "We can't let her get away."

"We won't let her!" Vera looked to Mikasa. "You with me?"

Mikasa nodded enthusiastically. "Of course."

Together, the two rookies headed up the wall as well, and after designating a hand each, they sliced the Female Titan's fingers clean off. Blood splattered Vera's face as she made the cut, but when she heard the Titan drop beneath her, she felt a sense of pride flow through her veins.

As soon as the Female Titan hit the ground, Eren was on top of her in the blink of an eye. He punched her over and over again until her head popped off and then punched some more until the bones in his arms broke and snapped off. Then, with his mouth wide open, he went for the nape.

"Oh no! He's going to devour her whole!" Hange panicked.

Everyone shouted at Eren to stop because, in order for any of this to be worth it, they needed to take Annie alive. Eren, however, was too far gone at that point, and as he ripped away the flesh to reveal Annie's human body, it looked like it was all over.

Just before Eren bit down, however, he stopped. Eyes transfixed on Annie, he just stared.

Then, before he could do anything, a flash of bright white light emitted from what was left of the Female Titan and, to everyone's disbelief, the two Titans began to melt together. As Eren's Titan let out a scream, the same crystallization that the Female Titan used to harden her skin began to form around Annie's body, protecting her.

"Stop it, Eren!" Mikasa was worried about what this merging would do to him. Before she could step in though, Levi dropped down from the sky, once again dressed in his Scout uniform, and cut Eren's body free from his Titan.

As soon as the dust and steam had settled, everyone was safe to return to the ground again. Staring up at the slowly disintegrating Titan bodies, no one was quite sure what to make of what they had just witnessed or the fact that Annie's body was now encapsulated by the indestructible crystal-like material.

This time, when Eren was pulled from his Titan form, his face was marked with red diamond-shaped patches on either side of his eyes. When he awoke, though, he didn't seem to be doing too badly. Hearing the repetitive clanging sound, he looked over to see Jean smacking the crystalized capsule with his already broken blade over and over again, yet to leave even a single dent.

"Damnit!" Jean huffed when the remainder of his blade shattered. "All the shit we've been through and this is what we get? Annie, wake up! Come on, face the music! You owe us! Don't be a coward! I know you can hear me!"

When Jean lifted his arm to start swinging again, Levi stopped him. "That's enough. It's over."

Slowly, Jean lowered his arm back down again.

"Someone get me a wire net," Hange ordered as they strolled over to the almond-shaped capsule. "This thing belongs deep underground."

As Levi turned to leave, Vera approached him. "Sir-" she started, but he stopped her before she could get her thought out.

"The girl is safe, Kline," he assured her. "I'm not in the business of letting children die."

"No, I didn't mean-"

"I know," Levi told her. And this time, when she turned to leave, it was his turn to stop her. "Oh, and Kline . . . there's nothing wrong with ending up like you, just so you know."

Those words sat with Vera for hours, all the way up until Eren had stirred awake in his hospital bed well after the battle had ended and Commander Erwin had been towed away by the MPs to answer some questions.

"Eren." Mikasa shifted on the bench she was sitting on beside the bed. "Do you feel okay?"

Slowly sitting up, Eren felt for the bandage wrapped around his head and looked to the window where the gentle evening breeze was swaying the thin, sheer curtains. "Yeah," he answered, looking from Mikasa, to Vera, to Armin, to Jean. "In fact, it's weird how okay I feel. So . . . is Annie still stuck in that thing?"

"Yeah." Jean nodded. "You'd think after all we sacrificed to get her back, fate would cut us a little slack."

"It's humbling, knowing how far she'll go to keep her secrets," Armin said.

"Humbling?" Jean scoffed. "More like infuriating."

Looking to his friend, Armin exhaled slowly. "Why'd you let her go, Eren?" Everyone was silent. "You did, didn't you? You gave her an out."

"I know." Shame was painted all over Eren's expression. "I didn't mean to . . . I just couldn't help it. When I saw her face, I just froze."

"Armin Arlert!" A booming voice came from the doorway, startling everyone. There, a soldier with a clipboard was standing before them. "And Jean Kirstein. You two are up first."

Jean sighed. "Debriefing time."

"See you later, I guess." Armin gave Eren a wave goodbye as he and Jean followed the soldier.

As soon as they were out of the room, Eren began to speak again. "Honestly, it felt kind of good just letting go," he said. "My body, my mind, everything. For a minute it was almost like I wanted to die."

"Eren, stop it!" Mikasa snapped.

"Don't worry, I'm better now." Eren let out a shaky breath.

Reaching out, Mikasa took Eren's hand between her own and hung her head. Sensing that the two could use a moment alone, Vera slipped out of the room without a word and made her way onto one of the nearby balconies so she could watch the sunset and clear her head before it was her turn to be debriefed.

Closing her eyes, Vera reflected back on everything that had happened since she had graduated from being a cadet. When she had first decided to become a soldier and do something with her life, she had, in all honesty, been expecting a few years—or more, if she was lucky—of routine service before sacrificing her life for the good of humanity, as they called it. But now, she was beginning to understand that her life was taking a path completely unknown and unanticipated; and she wasn't sure if that excited her or scared her.

When Vera opened her eyes again, she was no longer alone on the balcony. A small smile graced her lips as she turned to look at Reiner, who was staring out at the sunset.

"I heard you kicked ass out there today," he said. "Good job."

"Well, I didn't die, that's for sure." She moved closer to him, and once their arms touched each other on the railing, she stopped. "I thought you were supposed to be at the Scout base with everyone else?"

"I was. Just came to make sure you were still breathing, is all. I snuck out so I've gotta head back before Sasha and Connie decide they're sick of covering for me."

"Oh, yeah, you better hurry back then," she snickered. As her laughter died out, she sighed. "About what we talked about the other night . . . about whatever it is you can't tell me." She looked up at him. "I want you to know that it truly doesn't bother me."Reiner's gaze met her's. "Are you sure?" He carefully brushed a strand of loose hair behind her ear.

"Yes," she assured him with a smile. "The past month or so has been really eye-opening, and if I've learned one thing, it's that we all have secrets—stuff we would rather keep from everyone one. There's nothing wrong with that."

Reiner swallowed hard. "But what if it wasn't a normal secret? What if it was something . . . big?"

"After what we've been through, I doubt anything could surprise me anymore." Vera rested her head on his shoulder and drew in a deep, relaxing breath. Suddenly, all the questions she had had didn't matter anymore. "Haven't you heard? People are Titans now, Reiner. I doubt your secret could be any worse than that."

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ladyanaconda · 4 years ago

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Helluva Dad Vol. 3: Nerd

As I mentioned in the first one-shot, the events of the Harvest Moon Festival took place before Murder Family in this AU, so the discovery of the angelic weapon went differently. In other words, this prequel is where the canon divergence begins. Enjoy!

*HB-*

It's gonna be nice working with him. I asked him if he wants to join I.M.P.

Moxxie couldn't get those words out of his head. Striker working at I.M.P.? As much as he hated to admit it, he could actually picture it. The cowboy was an ace at… Well, everything, as far as he knew. This didn't mean Moxxie was happy at the prospect of having him as a co-worker, however. Striker had done nothing but rub Moxxie's lack of physical strength and 'balls to his face; heaven, even Striker's five-year-old kid made fun of him in a more innocent, child-like manner.

Moxxie felt a pit in the bottom of his stomach; if Striker does join I.M.P., where would this leave him in the company? Blitzo's the boss, Millie the powerhouse, and Striker might as well replace Moxxie as the weapons expert, not to mention become an additional powerhouse. Where would that leave Moxxie? Besides, he wasn't sure if he wanted to work with the guy who humiliated him via song, the one thing Moxxie thought he'd at least be better at.

Joe and Lynn never liked Moxxie for Millie from the beginning. 'Too much of a wimpy fag', he overheard them say more than once. 'He can't handle something as simple as gathering eggs from the chicken coop*, how is he going to protect or provide for Millie?' Striker, on the other hand, was strong, imposing, fearless, manly. They treated him more like a son-in-law than Moxxie even if the cowboy wasn't wedded into the family. Moxxie was no fool; he'd seen his parents-in-law subtly trying to get Millie alone with Striker and have them spend time together, practically screaming 'dump your wimp of a husband and fuck this real man'.

These thoughts crossed Moxxie's mind as he climbed upstairs. Everyone else was outside, which was good because he wanted to be alone right now.

There was a thump in one of the rooms. Following the sound out of sheer curiosity, Moxxie noticed a white glow filtering underneath the door. Hey, isn't it Striker's room? Moxxie has a policy against entering someone's bedroom without permission, but his spite towards the cowboy imp and curiosity got the better of him.

He found little Jake on the bed. The impling looked frightened for a second until he noticed it was only Moxxie. "You not daddy!"

"What do you go there, little fella?"

"Nothig!" Jake spread out his arms in a feeble attempt at hiding whatever thing was on the bed. Moxxie only had to take a few steps forward to peek over Jake.

"Oh, my crumbs!" There, in a long case, was a beautiful black rifle with silvery designs that almost seemed to glow with a heavenly light. "A genuine carmine crafted blessing-tipped rifle."As Moxxie tried to touch it, Jake snapped his teeth at his hand. "Hey, watch it!"

"No touch! Daddy's rifle!" Jake growled adorably. Geez, the brat's got his father's awful character.

"How… How in the fuck did he get one of these?"

"Why don't you ask me, little dude?" Moxxie and Jake froze, though the latter seemed more like 'shit I'm in trouble' than 'shit I'm dead.

Striker was leaning against the door, arms crossed. He didn't look very happy.

"Boy, I thought we'd talked about this already," he told Jake sternly.

"I… I just wanna touch it, daddy." Jake whispered timidly.

"W-Why do you have this?! Mister!" Moxxie asked nervously. "You are aware this kind of weapon can kill…"

"...Demon royalty?" Striker finished grimly.

"Yes, that."

"Duuh! That what it for, dummy!" Jake stuck his tongue at Moxxie.

"Kiddo, Mrs. Lin is baking the lava berry pie you like so much. Why don't you go take a look while daddy has a word with Moxxie?" Did Striker just call him by his name? Jake yelled happily and climbed off the bed, speeding out of the room.

Moxxie felt a shiver down his spine as Striker closed the door shut behind him. "Well, I'm… I'm relatively concerned by your possession of this…" he stepped back warily as the cowboy walked towards him with a devilish grin, eyes glowing as he came to a halt right in front of Moxxie, silently staring down at him. "I'm also glad my instant dislike of you has been validated!"

Neither moved for a while. Then, against Moxxie's expectations, Striker gently moved him aside to gently run his fingers along the weapon's side. There was a sad, almost nostalgic look on his face.

"I cherish it, you know. It used to belong to someone who was very dear to me. Nowadays I rarely use it, though. So it's more like a memento." Moxxie was quite surprised at the emotion in his voice.

"Then you have used it."

"Well, I wasn't always a farmhand, little fella. Let's say I'd make a living as a hitman." Striker sat down on his bed, eyes on the rifle. "Whenever people wanted someone dead, they'd call me. Kind of what you guys do at I.M.P., but down here in Hell." He sighed. "Then my… priorities shifted."

Moxxie was about to ask him what he meant when he spotted a small box full of toys. "...Jake."

Striker nodded. "When Jake was born, I realized that kind of job endangered both my and his life on a nearly daily basis, so I had to retire and find a safer job. It's not as exciting as the thrill of shooting people's brains out of their skulls, but it puts bread on the table."

Moxxie wasn't sure what to say. Tentatively, he sat down next to Striker, rubbing the back of his head awkwardly. He wasn't pushed off, so he guessed it was okay.

"You've done a decent job, you know. He's a good kid… Most of the time." he murmured the last part.

An awkward silence followed until Striker spoke again. "So, Blitz said you're I.M.P.'s weapons expert."

"I am. Why, is it such a surprise for you?"

Striker shrugged. "What can I say? You don't give that impression, wimp."

Offended, Moxxie pulled out his pistol. "Walther P.38!"

Striker raised an eyebrow. "Looks pretty anemic compared to the peacekeeper."

"It's not about size, you know. It's about stamina."

"Is that so?" Striker smirked. "What can you tell me about the Thompson submachine gun?"

"Fifty rounds a drum, twenty-five a mag!" Moxxie said in excitement. "It's a good weapon, but its cocking mechanism always jams. The Russian P.P.S. personal assault weapon is a better choice."

"Maybe, but in the end, it's the experience that wins the day. It's not all about firepower."

"Indeed! I mean, even the best gun in all of Hell can be wasted in the hands of a newbie."

Striker laughed and gave Moxxie a strong pat on the back, unintentionally sending him to the ground.

"Not bad, wimp. Looks like you are good at something, after all."

Moxxie blinked in disbelief. "Was that a compliment?"

"Don't get used to it, little nerd." Striker chuckled, smirking. "You still have a long way to go to earn my respect."

"Who're you calling a nerd?!"

"Bowtie, fragile arms, pushover, you're afraid of a mere rooster. Should I continue?"

"For your information, I'm not afraid of the rooster!" Moxxie crossed his arms. Striker raised an eyebrow. "...I simply don't like the idea of getting infected with the avian flu, thank you very much."

Smirking again, Striker closed the case and walked out of the room. "Nerd."

"I'm not a nerd!"

*HB*

*A callback to the scenes in some movies when someone goes to the chicken coops to collect the eggs and is attacked by the rooster. Come on, you can't tell me you don't see this happening to Moxxie. And if living roosters are a pain, just imagine one straight from Hell.

#helluva boss #helluva boss fanfiction #striker helluva boss #helluva boss au #helluva dad #helluva striker #oneshot #canon divergence #helluva boss moxxie #helluva boss jake

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ketsuyuki-hibana-typed · 5 years ago

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Ever since I know the fact that Sanemi seriously drunk on that respect women juice, I become deeply fall in love onto his character.

Also, I really respect to women who patiently carrying other life inside their bellies. I loved it when women get the attention they needed when they are pregnant. Patients hubby! Patients!

Shinazugawa Sanemi x Pregnant!Reader

(Warning: NSFWish; Sex Mention)

Sanemi has just came home in the morning after night mission when he heard rattling and choking sound from the bathroom.

He rushed to the bathroom, grabbing his sword in case it's a demon who attacked you.

It's not, he found you holding your body into the sink while panting. You covered your mouth, keeping the urge to vomit.

"(y/n)!"

"Sane- mi- It's okay, I'm just di-" Your voice was cut of with another vomits.

Sanemi was panicked, without thinking twice, he ran to bedroom, snatching his other big white haori and came back to you.

He wrapped you in his haori, carrying you out to Butterfly Estate.

"Hang on!"

When he arrived, the medic staff immediately took you off from him or else, he wouldn't stop shouting to them.

"Wind Pillar, your wife is in good hand now, let us take care of your wounds first. You've just came back from mission."

"Until I got good news from my wife, I'm not going anywhere."

"We know, but-"

"Shinazugawa-san." Shinobu took the lead, signing them to leave both of you. They nodded. "Your wife is in good condition, the symptoms are all natural."

"Symptoms? Natural?"

"Please prepare yourself because you'll become a father soon." Shinobu smiled and left, going back to your ward.

"I'm- a father?"

Shinobu escorted you out from the ward. But, she's not telling you that you're pregnant.

So when you discovered Sanemi on his knees, you immediately become confused and looked back at Shinobu.

She let out brightest smile and tapped your shoulder. "Take care the baby inside your belly, ok? Don't forget to consult here, twice a month. I'll leave you two alone."

You stumbled upon hearing that, before trembling and looked at your husband.

Sanemi suddenly stood up, and hugged you. You just realized that he's crying, his tears were dropping on your shoulder.

"I'm glad nothing happened to you."

"Sanemi, I'm pregnant." You whispered softly right at his ear. "I'm pregnant."

"I know." He tightened his hug.

When the news spreads amongst the Demon Slayer Corps, they all were in shock especially the Pillars.

Sanemi told them that both of you hasn't plan on having a child after married, not until both of you retired.

"Shinazugawa, do you have some sort of breeding kink or-"

"Talk again and I'll make sure to cut that tongue off from your mouth, Uzui."

Sanemi promised he will be a good husband, promised that what happened to his mother and his siblings will never happen to you.

He didn't want to be like his father. His mind was still fresh when he saw his father beated his mom, even when she still carrying Genya inside her womb.

No, not gonna happen to you.

When he's about to went out for mission, he will give you long lecture on how you should rest and didn't do anything stupid while he gone.

"Don't forget to eat. Don't walk around too much. No training, let those kids train by themselves. Call Shinobu if you need something, also.... probably Genya. Just call him."

"It's first trisemester, Sanemi. I'm sure I'll be fine."

"First trisemester is the most critical state." He kissed you on your temple. "I don't want anything happen to you and the baby."

But it's not you if it's not stubborn. You continued to train your students, quietly accepting mission when he was out.

And it affects to your second semester.

It all started when you casually doing chores and suddenly collapsed. You're lucky because your husband was nearby and was in time to caught you before you hit the ground.

"Did... Did you do heavy activities like jumping?"

"Um, I-" You hesitantly looked at your husband, and turned again to Shinobu's face. It's too late to lie now. "Yes, yes I did."

The Insect Pillar lets out long sighs and said, "You shouldn't do that. It's fortunate that your action, whatever it is, didn't result with miscarriage. I want you to be careful from now on. Collapsing might be continued, so please take care of your body."

Sanemi must be so disappointed. You silently walked behind him on the way on your home.

"What do you want? I'll cook for you."

"E- Eh?" You blinked in disbelief. "You- You're not ang- oww!"

"Of course I am!" He pinched both of your cheek, irk mark slowly appeared from his forehead. "But... Half of them is my fault though..."

You grabbed his hand, tilting your head. "No? It's not?"

"I left you when you needed me the most." He sighed and put his palm on your head. "I should be here with you, not going on mission. I understand it's hard." You unconsciously patted his chest, feeling more guilty for making him worry.

Sanemi wasn't so clueless. He knew how to handle pregnant woman from his experience taking care of his mother.

Ever since Sanemi knew you were gone for short mission while he went out for mission too, he ordered Genya to monitor you.

Genya didn't mind, not a little bit. He gradually checked you, escorted you to Butterfly Estate, and always stood by your side whenever you need him

"Genya, thank you so much for your help." You sat down on the engawa, he borrowed your kitchen and make teas.

"It's okay. I was so happy when Aniki told me to take care of you. Well, although his tone was more like ordering than asking, but I know his intent is good." Genya joined you, slowly pouring the tea into your cup.

"I'm so sorry. I will scold him when he came back home."

"Ane-san." He flashed his bright smile. "You were the one who make us being 'a siblings' once again. This is how I thanked you."

You gently placed your hand on your stomach, while looking at him. "The baby was excited after you said that." He chuckled.

"I hope you're always healthy, Ane-san. Aniki really loves you."

Sanemi might be not that kind but he always listened to your carvings.

Even though it's weird ones.

"Mitarashi dango but with miso soup." "Baked snack but I just want the head."

"What the hell is that." But he will make extra effort for it, making sure that it's edible for your mouth.

"Sanemi, your crow looks good too."

"WHAT, NO-"

Or-

"Sanemi, I don't know why but I just wanted to smack you right now."

"With lips, su-"

"No, with-" *SLAP* "My hands."

"WHAT THE- HEY STOP, YOU'RE ABUSING FUTURE FATHER!"

Sometimes, it's all about mood swings.

"Hey, I'll go to run groceries. What do you want."

"Nothing."

"Why are you suddenly become shy like this? You usually shout to me to buy you oden at 3 fuxking a.m."

"Shush, language."

He didn't know both of you still could have sex until Shinobu told him even though you're pregnant, but Sanemi isn't risking it. For this 9 months or more, he'll be patient. Your health and happiness are his priority.

"I was thinking about second child."

"No, we won't talk about it until you deliver the baby safely."

"You're right." You pouted and slammed your head at his arm. "I wonder if my stomach will stretch, leaving marks here and there on my hip area. Maybe, when we had sex, the mood will suddenly turn off because-"

"Well, I never said that I'm not into scar or marks." Sanemi turned his head, smirking. Your face reddened, your hand playfully smacked his head.

"Pervert." Suddenly, you felt your baby 'trying' to break free.

You guided his hand. Sanemi fidgeted, slowly touched your big belly. He could feel small bulge kicking his palm. He became excited, and put his ear on your stomach.

The beats, he could sense it. The baby will be fine.

"We will raise the baby, together."

Sanemi really hoped everything going smooth when you finally stepped on the last semester.

He worked hard on everything, providing your food, extra small futon, the clothes, checking you up gradually and else.

But not all things are according to his plans.

Oyakata-sama suddenly gave you and Sanemi a mission.

"I'm afraid that my wife will have trouble to move anywhere and will detain this mission."

"I want her to rest too, Sanemi. I know it's hard to bring the baby, but I don't have any choice. (y/n)'s ability is the only hope to solve this problem."

Can't they wait until his wife safely giving birth?

Of course not.

With one heavy sighs, he finally accepted Oyakata's request. When he told you about the details, you said that he didn't need to worry.

The mission completed without a single stretch landed on your body because he really protected you.

But, you suddenly sat down on the ground, holding your stomach, panting heavily

"Sa- Sanemi. I-" He looked at you in horror. Blood started to gushing out down there. He quickly carried you out from the forest, took you to the nearest town that hopefully has doctor or better, maternity clinic.

Luckily, he found one. He rushed inside and told everything about your condition to anyone who in charge. His voice still sounded panicking but he managed to compose himself. The staffs said that he could wait outside and quickly took lead of your body.

Sanemi sat down on the engawa with mixed feelings. He prepared for the best, and the worst. He gripped his sword, feeling more than ready to slash anything who disturbed his wife.

But he can't concentrate.

It's strange place, strange people he didn't familiar with. If he could be so honest, he didn't want you to deliver your baby here. He can't completely trust them to take care of you, he want you to safely giving birth in Butterfly Estate because at least, he knew you're in good hand.

He heard you screaming and groaning in pain, he had to stay calm and regained his sanity to stay focus. If he wants, he wanted to hold your hands and encouraging you, telling that everything will be fine. But he can't just barge in, you needed him to be your guard in case something bad happens.

And those anxieties were suddenly gone when he heard cries of a baby.

He ran inside, still gripping his sword. He saw his baby, both of your baby.

"Congratulations, Shinazugawa-san. It's a boy!!" One of the staffs was handing him his baby. He dropped his sword, tremblingly embrace his child onto his chest.

But his happiness quickly distracted when he can't find you anywhere in this room.

"Where is my-"

"Doc! We need your help, her body temperature rapidly decreased!!"

His heart skipped a beat. He tightened his grip on his son.

"Shinazugawa-san-"

"WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED TO MY WIFE?!"

"Please calm down. I promised I'll save her. Your baby needed skin contact, please keep him warm."

"I WILL-"

"No, please stay here. Keep the skin contact with your baby, I'll be back soon." The doctor ran back to another room, shutting the door behind him.

Sanemi was alone in that room, with his son in his embrace, still crying. He kissed his temple, wrapping the fabric around him to make him more warm.

He sat down, sagged his back on the wall.

Busy to mumbling prayers on his baby's ears while crying.

..........

It was 3 months ago, now you're in the house, carrying your baby while sitting down on the futon.

Sanemi peeked up from the bedroom door, you nodded, signed him 'It's okay, he's sleeping now.'

"How's your body." He kissed your forehead, his fingers slowly rubbed circle on his son's cheek. The child quirked a soft smile, still sleeping peacefully.

"I'm all good. Thanks to Shinobu. If she didn't come that night, maybe I will not-"

"Gaaa!! Hehe!"

Both of you suddenly heard happy gurgling down there. The child woke up. Sanemi looked at you, feeling a little guilty because his voice woke him up after you finally made him sleep. You just chuckled and kissed your baby.

Sanemi's fingers traveled around his son's, wiggling them while smiling. His child's laugh echoed thorough the room, heard like angel's symphony to him.

He hugged you along with his baby.

"Sanemi?"

This is his treasure and happiness now. He will never lose it, he will never give up on raising his child, - or maybe soon, children -, he will always protect his little family, his own pearl.

"Thank you for everything you bring to my life."

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marshmallowprotection · 3 years ago

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Hello, maybe you coukd give me some tips. I send you that ask already but it means ght be deleted by tumblr and it was all messy and ugly.

So I have one childhood friend, we used to do everything together till highschool. Often she was my only friend, like now. We slowly started to distance from each other sonce she has a boyfriend. For all those years I did my best to accept him and all, told myself that duh she is not obliged to spent time only with me even in situation when she spent less and less time with me. Sometime I had a bit trouble to fully accept bf because sometime when they argued she was venting to me and I felt like his is hurting her but she refused to break up with him. Boy eas very insecure, no friends and so on and one day around graduating junior hight school she wanted to break up with him but he said something like he is gonna hurt himself if she will, or just drop out the school. So she wanted to wait at least until he graduate, but she waited longer. Then just after we graduated hightschool she broke up with him like she had enought. It was prolly a mistake but after she vent I said one or two things about him concerning past events and I said 'wow finally'. After a while they made up and she said she just missend him. I promissed mtself I will never comment whatever she tell me about them, unless in a good way.

Well... the point is that I am probably jellous, that she doesnt want to spent time with me anymore. Alway if I ask her out I give her to eventually pick the date, if nit today then maybe tomorrow etc y know introvert way :D And im trying to save this friendship? She is not the person busy 24/7, unless maybe when she is in uni or we count playing games as being busy. I play games too sometime.

Sometime it seems like she tries to avoid me and dont want to tell me anything. One day I was talking to her in cafee and she was just fidgeting with her phone. She didnt even like heck the socialmedia, just switching between random (system?) folders on the phone. When I asked abt it why she doesnt listen, she said she wanted to do sth but forgot what. Another time I havent seen her for months and she alway soent holidays 1 month her bf comes to her (he lives abroad already I guess) and I dont want to disturb them of feel like third wheel and the other month she come to him. So like week before she pnanned to go I asked her to go out next day. She said she cant. So asked another day, she answered : but I go to my bf. So I surprised that its that soon and sad I missed the oportunity: oh really? When? She: on Friday me: but its Monday(?)(no answer) so...? She: ught I know ;;; but lately I dont really feel like going anywhere :(

Well... maybe I'm childish but I felt sad.

I'm also jellous that they even celebrate each others bdays altought she never do that bc of religious reasons and I've always respected that.

Once I asked her what is with us, we barely talk for last few years and I feel like she is avoiding me. She had no Idea what I was talking about, she felt like everything was the same.

I was told to not have much hope or expectations toward her bu maybe try to text her or maybe arrange a meeting once in a while and try not to become bitter.

The other one sait that that how adulthood looks like, we become busier with private issues and so on and I may act childish and selfish, but as far as I know except for time she go to uni or to her bf she is not that busy, definitely not that busy not to have time to meet with me more than once in a whole year (or none) when we live ~20min apart by foot. I dont want to be burden to anyone or feel like third wheel so I dunno what to do. I have problem with finding friends, she was my only one friend (?) for years. I dont trust ppl easly

I wanted to do more things together outside since we both used to or still do soent too much time on the computer but well... you know, together is easier.

Since I have to do it on my own maybe you have some ideas? Thats stupid wuestion I guess since you dont know my environment. Jogging and biking wont work I guess since I dont have proper bike. I wanted to plant some flowers but I was afraid I screw everything up since im kida kid who grow up in the bubble and Im not sure how to do basics and nobody wanted to help me and its too late already... Walk is fine but I prefer places far from road and since I'm not supposed to go to the forest that I love I dont have many spots to go.

I am sorry for long post. Any even tiny help would be appreaciated. I hope thats not much of the problem, have a nice day or night :)

-PineconeAnon

I do think that it's time for you to let go of the friendship. I know that's hard to do but people grow apart and that's okay. It's okay. You'll be able to make better relationships and move forward but you have to learn to let go and keep walking forward. It sounds like you're holding onto this friendship because you want to keep going on like it's the past but...

It doesn't work like that. Change happens. It hurts sometimes but it's not a bad thing. You can reflect on this with time and learn how to be able to accept it. You need someone that wants to hang out with you and relax with you. It's not childish to be upset but it's important to see when people just... don't have time for you anymore and feelings change.

It just seems like you both have a fundamental misunderstanding and if you can't talk that through, then it's not working. You can try to talk about it but it seems like it'd be better to just let go. She doesn't think there's something wrong but you do. If you feel stress around her instead of friendship, it's not great.

But, that's up to you, you know? You decide your relationships what you want them to be.

I don't really have great advice for making friends as an adult. I'm not exactly going out and interacting with people. I can suggest finding a new set of friends online by joining Discords and interacting with the fandoms you're in because that's how I've made friends. It's easier to do that if you're anxious about making friends outside.

Try new hobbies. Take a deep breath. If you want to garden, try it out. You're not going to be perfect the first time. It's a learning process at anything and you have to just try. You don't get to live it if you don't try. You have to consider your limits and reflect on what is going to be the easiest thing to try.

It's never too late.

Try to start small and work your way up.

#pinecone anon #ask #mod kait

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skywalkersthelimit · 4 years ago

Text

Okay so I'm super nervous to post this but I wrote this one-shot for the #trikey fandom. Ive had this idea for awhile but I finally got around to writing it. It's based off the song Lips of an angel by Hinder. I think its perfect for Michael and Trevor lol so please let me know what you think and I hope you enjoy!

Honey, why are you calling me so late?

It’s kinda hard to talk right now

Honey, why are you crying, is everything okay?

I gotta whisper 'cause I can't be too loud

Michael woke up to his phone ringing on his bedside table. He knew who it was before he even looked. He didn’t know how or why because it could have been a number of people. He reached over and grabbed the phone. His eyes squinted from the bright light. Trevor. He was both glad and disappointed he was right but he supposed he might have willed it to be. His thoughts had been filled with his crew mate, best friend and sometimes more, but that was before Amanda and the kids. Well that wasn’t entirely true. Every time they went on a job together, they fell into each other as soon as they were alone in their hotel room. Michael just couldn’t help himself.

It had been a few months since he had seen Trevor though. He tried to put distance between them. He knew that Trevor had a hard time just sleeping together on occasions and understanding Michael had a family to go home to. Michael wanted nothing more than for his friend to be happy but he just couldn’t be the one to give it to him.

He stared as the phone rang and debated answering but he pictured Trevor’s face the last time he had seen him with tears rolling down his face, begging Michael to stay. His heart clenched and he answered.

“Hello?” he whispered. He looked over at Amanda still sleeping. He had to be quiet. He didn't want to wake her and have her find out who he was talking to. He didn’t feel like fighting tonight.

“Hey." Trevor’s voice rang out on the other side of the phone.

“Jesus, Trev. Do you know what time it is?” He flinched as the words left his mouth. He didn’t mean to sound upset but he did.

Trevor laughed dryly.

“Oh I’m sorry, Princess. Am I interrupting your beauty sleep? I thought I might call my best friend who hasn’t talked to me in months” he said coldly.

“Trevor, if you want to talk you can call and you can call during the day.” Amanda moved next to him. He had to be quiet.

“Works both ways. If you wanted to talk you would have called. But you didn’t.” His voice cracked and ended in a broken sob. Michael hated himself a little more.

“T, why are you crying? Is everything okay?” he whispered. He wished he was there with Trevor right now. He would pull him into his arms and hold him until the tears stopped like he always did.

“Speak up M. I cant hear you"

“I have to be quiet or I’ll wake up-" he let his sentence go unfinished, trying to be careful not to set T off.

“Ah, of course. Wouldn’t want to wake the Mrs. I’ll let you go." He could hear the anger, the jealousy, the sadness, and the pain in Trevor’s voice.

“No!” he said rather loudly. He snapped over to look at Amanda, who just turned over on her side away from him. He sighed. “Don’t go. Just- Hang on.” He got out of bed quietly and snuck out the room. He grabbed his cigarettes off the counter and sat down on the couch, lighting one up and taking a deep inhale and exhale. He wasn't supposed to smoke in the house, but fuck it.

Well, my girl's in the next room

Sometimes I wish she was you

I guess we never really moved on

It's really good to hear your voice saying my name

It sounds so sweet

Coming from the lips of an angel

Hearing those words - it makes me weak

And I never wanna say goodbye

But, girl, you make it hard to be faithful

With the lips of an angel

“Now tell me what’s going on, Trev. I can't be too loud. Mandy and the kids are in the other room asleep" he explained.

“I-I don’t know. I just needed to hear your voice.” Trevor replied quietly, his voice soft and tight like he was trying to stop himself from crying. Michael wondered what had him so upset. He had heard he had a boyfriend of sorts from Lester and apparently they’ve been doing jobs together for L since Michael saw T last. When L told him, he saw red. He got wasted and wound up outside screaming and crying at the night sky. Trevor was his, but he wasn't and he never would be. He didn’t want to but he hoped Trevor was calling to tell him he left that guy and to ask when Michael was coming back to work, to him. There was also a chance Trevor was calling because he was drunk and cranked out. Either due to said guy or something else or even for the hell of it. He might be in trouble or lying somewhere drugged out.

“Is it that guy you’re with?” Michael realized how incredibly jealous he sounded but maybe he was. Maybe he missed being on the road, never staying in one place too long. Maybe he missed the thrill of the job, and maybe he missed looking over in the middle of a heist and grinning at Trevor who was grinning just as hard back. Maybe he missed pulling Trevor into a hard kiss as soon as their hotel door shut and having the most passionate nights of his life, and then falling asleep in his lover’s arms. Maybe he even missed the times they just sat on the bed and talked for hours about any and everything. Maybe sometimes he wished it was Trevor who was in the other room, waiting for him to come back to bed.

“How-how do you even know about that?” Trevor asked, sounding surprised.

“Lester.”

“Of fucking course. Well not that it’s any of your business but he's asleep. It ain’t like he’s my boyfriend or anything. You know I ain’t they settling type. There’s only one exception. Fuck. I miss you, Mikey.” He sobbed.

“Trev-"

“It's okay. I understand. It’s just so good to hear your voice, Mikey.” There goes that nickname again. A nickname only Trevor called him. A nickname that sounded so sweet coming from Trevor’s lips. Like an angel. A fallen angel maybe.

“It's really good to hear your voice too T. Mikey. That’s a name I haven't heard in awhile” he said fondly.

“What, too good to be called Mikey anymore?” T said annoyed.

“No, not at all. Although you are the only one who calls me that, but I like it.” He felt his cheeks flush and his heart flutter as he spoke.

“Yeah?”

“Yeah. Now tell me what’s going on please."

“When are you gonna do a job? It’s been months. We miss you out there. I miss you. I-I need you, Mikey. Please come back to me. I can't stop thinking about you. You haunt me every waking moment, and even in my dreams. Do you dream of me?” Hearing those words made Michael feel weak. He almost told Trevor he was on his way, grabbed his car keys and left without a second thought, but he couldn’t. He wouldn’t leave his children. He might do a few jobs now and then but he wouldn’t choose that life over them. No matter how bad he craved it, craved him.

It's funny that you're calling me tonight

And, yes, I've dreamt of you too

And does he know you're talking to me?

Will it start a fight?

No, I don't think she has a clue

“Trevor, I-I want to be there. You know I do, but I got Tracey and Jimmy to think about, but I think about you too. All the time. Especially lately. It’s funny you called. And yeah, I’ve dreamt of you too T.” He didn’t know why he was being so open about this, about whatever it was between them, but hearing how broken Trevor sounded and how it matched how he felt inside, he knew they both needed to hear it. To hear that Michael cared about him, that he missed Trevor just as much as he missed him.

“Oh yeah? What’d you dream about, cowboy?” he asked and Michael could picture his thick eyebrows wagging. He laughed, genuinely laughed. Something he hadn’t done since the last time he saw Trevor.

“It wasn’t like that. Well not all like that.” Now it was Trevor’s turn to laugh.

“Tell me.” He told Michael.

“We were in a nice house, our house. We were happy.” He whispered, afraid of the way his dream made him feel. He didn’t want to dream of Trevor, of their future that would never be. He wished he could let Trevor go, but he didn’t think he ever fully would.

“It doesn’t have to be a dream, Mikey. The kids can be in your life, our life.” Trevor pleaded. Michael had to change the subject before he agreed.

“What about that guy you've been seeing? Does he know you’re talking to me? Won't he get mad?”

"I told you he's not my boyfriend. I don't care if he gets mad, but no, he doesn't know I'm talking to you. He doesn't know anything about you except you're the great Michael Townley, expert thief. He actually wants to meet you." Trevor laughed dryly at that. "What about Amanda? Does she know you're talking to me? Does she know anything?"

Does she know anything, meaning does she know when Michael goes away to work he all but forgets about her? Does she know that his nights with Trevor are filled with more passion than their whole marriage has ever seen? Does she know that Michael's heart will never fully belong to her?

"No, no I don't think she has a clue, Trev." He sighed. The guilt constantly ate at him and he tried so hard to be the husband she deserved, the father his children deserved, but he never would me. He belonged to the game, to Trevor, but it didn't matter. How he felt didn't matter, couldn't matter. He would push his feelings down to the bottom of his heart with a smile.

"Mikey. I miss you so much. So much it hurts. I can't get you out of head, out of my heart. I've tried drugs and alcohol. I've tried fucking anyone in sight and even getting a wannabe you, but nothing works. I've tried telling myself you're better off with her, but you're not. You're miserable and so am I. Please just do the best thing for you, for us." He begged through sobs. Michael could hardly make out what he was saying.

He felt tears rolling down his face. He felt Trevor's words stab his soul. He tried to drown Trev out too. He drank so much even he was worried. He smoked several packs of cigarettes a day. He went to strip clubs almost every night and almost every time he brought one of the girls to his car or a hotel for a quick fuck. He just wanted to feel numb, to never know the pain of loving someone you could never be with. What was that saying? It's better to have loved and lost than to never have loved at all. He wasn't sure if he agreed, but inevitably he did. He would feel this pain a thousand times just to know what it was like to love and be loved by this man. What it felt like to lay in his arms as he rubbed his back and kissed his head. He couldn't give that up. He wasn't ready for that.

"I'm gonna call Lester tomorrow and get a job set up. I'll let you know where to go. Everything will be okay. I'll see you in a few days. I promise. Okay?"

"Yeah okay, but what about-" Michael cut him off.

"We'll talk about everything then." He knew he was lying and Trevor probably did too. They both knew he would never be able to leave his family and that pretty little white lies would have to suffice them.

"Okay Mikey, I'll see you in a few days. And you better show up" he threatened, half jokingly.

"I'll be there, Trev. And Trev?"

"Yeah?"

"Next time call me during the day" he said chuckling.

"Yes princess. See ya soon Mikey." He said before hanging up.

Trevor just makes it too hard to be faithful and Michael was weak.

#trikey #michael de santa #trevor philips #gta v #Spotify

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toomanyfandoms02 · 4 years ago

Text

Memories // Matthew Gray Gubler x Reader

Sixth blurb request! For @paniconthepitch Requests are still open!

I know this was suppose to be a blurb, but I got carried away soooo :) enjoy that.

I really like this one guys

Summary - Readers boyfriend breaks up with her and she heads to Matthews house, where she recalls all the times she knew she was in love with Matthew.

Word Count - 2.7k

Prompts - "Just shut up and kiss me." & "I need a place to stay."

You know those days where you think they are going so well, and suddenly, the worst possible outcome of the day happens?

That was today for me.

After such a great date night, I didn't quite imagine myself walking down my boyfriends street crying.

Or should I say ex-boyfriend.

I trudged down the road, my fists clenched at my sides and head held as low as it could physically go without detaching from my body. I knew that moving in with him was a risky move, but I didn't have much choice. I had been kind of couch surfing for a while and he offered to let me stay at his house. A stable roof over my head.

Or so I thought.

Now here I was, heading in no particular direction with only a small suitcase dragging behind me, a wallet in my hand and a phone in my pocket. I had been walking for about 20 minutes. Turning down random streets, not really paying attention to what was happening. Here's another question for ya.

Have you ever heard of the saying, 'When it rains it pours.'?

Well I have. And I am currently experiencing it. Just as I turned onto what seemed to be the first familiar street I had seen in the past 20 minutes, it started *raining*. But not just sprinkling, no, I wasn't that lucky. It was a total downpour.

I looked up at the green sign above me.

*Oakland Street*

That was Matthew's street!

See, Matthew and I had been friends for a long time. I considered him family. His mom and my mom were great friends, and still are. She visits Marilyn still. But I rarely see him anymore, he's always busy filming which is completely understandable. And now your probably thinking.

*If he was such a good friend, why didn't you ask him for help when you were couch surfing?*

Well the short answer is that I was embarrassed of being basically homeless. I look up to him and I didn't want him thinking I was a lost cause or helpless little girl.

But I had no choice now.

I trudged up to his door in my now soaked clothes. I was still crying, despite me *really* trying to hold it together.

It was 9:38 and I was hoping he was still up. Chances are he was, judging by the many sleepovers we had in the past where he would stay up until 4 am. I knocked softly on the door, backing up a few steps from it. I wiped my face a little, trying to dry it from tears and raindrops, but miserably failing.

The door opened slowly to reveal Matthew in plaid pajama pants and a white tee. As expected, he was holding a cup of coffee, which he quickly set down on a table near the door.

"Y/n?" He tilted his head, not coming out of the doorway. I was sure I looked like quite the mess right now. Soaked clothes, flushed face, messy hair, exactly what I *didn't* want him to see.

"I need a place to stay." I was now looking down, tears welling up in my eyes again from sheer embarrassment. I could feel my fists clenching together, nails sure to leave bruises in my hand.

"Come in, come in." He waved me in. I kept my head down as I walked through his door. "Are you alright? What happened?" I had a problem with Matthew where I just couldn't lie to him, it had been like that all our lives. He was so hard to keep things from, whether it was because he was my best friend or because it was so hard to look into those soft brown eyes and tell a lie.

"I've been living with Ben for a while, because I haven't exactly had enough money to keep up with rent payments... But he just broke up with me." I looked up to see pity written across his face. "Please don't look at me like that. I know it's pitiful." I leaned my head all the way back on his couch, staring at the ceiling.

"I'm not trying to show pity y/n, I'm just worried about you. Why didn't you tell me you were having troubles?" He put his hand on my knee, shaking it for an answer.

"Because I knew you would look at me like that!" I waved my hands around his face.

"Whatever you say. Just tell me what happened." As soon as I got a few words out, I was tearing up again.

*"I just don't understand Ben! I want to understand! You never talk to me anymore." I was gesturing wildly with my hands, something I had picked up from Matthew at a young age. I was trying to get my point across.*

*"I feel like I'm taking care of you y/n! I don't need a child I need a girlfriend!" His eyes held so much hate, much different from the soft green ones I had fallen for a few months ago.*

*"What are you even talking about? I just got a job Ben. I clean the house every week. I cook dinner for you, and I'm paying part of the rent! What more do you want from me?" I felt so confused and defeated, the longer I talked the quieter my words became. "If you want me to leave I will. Is this some sick, twisted way to say you don't love me anymore?" He went silent for a moment.*

*"I don't love you anymore." His arms hung heavy at his side. Are you kidding me?*

*"Did I do something wrong?"*

*"You're just, you're hard to love y/n." What the fuck is that suppose to mean?*

*"Fuck you Ben! I did nothing to you." I ran to our shared room, packing my suitcase and grabbing my charger and wallett from the side table. "You are a real piece of work." I could feel my body aching from mental exhaustion. "I'll be back to get the rest of my stuff another day." I stood by the door, grabbing the handle. "Hopefully if I'm so hard to love, I won't be so hard to get over."*

"And that was the last thing I said to him." Matthews thumb wiped a tear from my cheek. "I'm sorry, I'm such a mess."

"You don't have to apoligize for having emotions y/n. I'm here for you, always." He had first said this to me when we were in middle school, I thought that was the sweetest thing a teenage boy could say. "You can stay here as long as you want, I miss seeing you around anyway." He smiled, pushing some hair behind my ear. I set my head on his shoulder. It was really hard talking to him about this stuff. I think the real reason it was so hard to lie to him, was because it's hard to lie to someone you are *so* in love with.

Matthew seemed to be out of reach my whole life. It wasn't that he was massively popular, or that we were part of different cliques. It was really just because I thought he could never see me as anything more than a friend.

When I was 13, that's when I fell in love with him. I just didn't know it at the time.

*"Y/n this is so great! I can't believe I got the lead!" Spencer was spinning in my swivel chair that sat at my desk.*

* "I've always told you that you we're good at acting. Maybe you'll be an actor?"*

*No way! I'm gonna be a lawyer or something." He nearly fell from the chair laughing, as if the proposition of being an actor was so out of this world. There was a sparkle in his eye that I had never seen before. It was so refreshingly different from the days he had come to me after school, telling me that some assholes were pushing him around.*

*"I'm so happy for you, you're gonna do amazing! You better not leave me when you're famous." I shoved his shoulder playfully. That was truly a joke, but I could feel, deep in my subconscious, I was afraid that maybe he would.*

*"I would never!" And he didn't.*

But I couldn't do anything about how I felt.

"I don't wanna be a burden on you." I had stopped crying, but I was still slumped on the couch like a wet rag, *literally*.

"You could never be a burden on me. Here." He handed me a picture frame from his side table. It was of me and him when were were 22, it was a surprise party I threw for him. "Do you remember this?"

"How could I forget the first time I got you drunk?" And the night I realized I was in love with you *for sure*.

*Matthew had refused to get drunk on his 21st birthday. He was so responsible that it was nearly infuriating. So when he texted me telling me that someone came up to him on the street and offered him a modelling job, I knew I had to throw a party. Just me him and some of our friends.*

*I led him into my house with 4 of our other friends there. There was a seemingly illegal amount of liquor on my dining room table.*

*"Oh no! Y/n no, you're not gonna get me drunk!" He looked down at me disapprovingly. I stuck my bottom lip out, and gave him puppy dog eyes.*

*"Please Matthew? Just one time? I wanna know what kind of drunk you are." My puppy face turned into a slightly mischievous one.*

*"What kind of drunk I am?"*

*"Yeah! Like sad drunk, funny drunk, angry drunk, sleepy, reckless, philosophical. I wanna know!" I giggled, dragging him over to the table and already pouring him a shot.*

*"Fine, just one time."*

*And I did find out what kind of drunk he was.*

*A lovey drunk.*

*"Brian. You are the coolest person I know!" Matthew slurred, leaning over to our mutual friend. "And Katie is the funniest." He pointed to Katie. "And you! You are my favorite person in the whole world, you know that?" He was now laying in my lap, his head looking up at me.*

*"You are a mess." I laughed, patting his cheek.*

*"I am not a mess! I'm totally coherent! I love you so much! Look at you!" He sat up, kissing my cheek. I'm glad he was drunk because I didn't want him to remember the dark shade of red my cheeks turned afterward.*

*I loved this man, and it was kicking me in the ass.*

"A lovey drunk you called me." He chuckled as I gripped the frame.

"Do you remember all the things you said that night?" I half smiled, remembering the kiss om my cheek.

"Not really, to this day I live in blissful ignorance."

"Well today is the day you know." I giggled, crossing my legs on the couch and facing him.

"Wait! Before you tell me of all the dumb things I did that night, let me get you some dry clothes." He stood from the couch, heading to his room.

"Thank you!"

He came back holding and NYU hoodie and some sweatpants. I snatched them from his arms with a big smile and headed to the bathroom to change.

The only time before that I had worn his clothes was freshman year after an asshole from school pushed me in the mud while we were on our way to study at Matthew's.

*Matthew and I were walking side by side on the walkway, talking about random things.*

*"If you do get a cat, what are you gonna name it?" Matthew asked, keeping his eyes forward.*

*"I think I would name it Leo. After Leonardo DiCaprio, he's a dreamboat." He looked at me with an eyebrow raised.*

*"Really? That dork?"*

*"Says you! You're a huge dork!" I nudged him into the road with a laugh.*

*Just then I heard loud and fast footsteps coming from behind us. Suddenly large hands were shoving me into the nearest mud puddle. I gasped at the cold liquid that was soaking through my jeans and yellow shirt.*

*"Nice outfit y/n!" The asshole laughed, running down the sidewalk.*

*"Fuck you Ricky!" Matthew threw up his middle finger and helped me out of the mud. "Come on, I'll give you some clothes at my house."*

*When we arrived he handed me sweatpants and a Nirvana shirt. I changed into it and Matthew probably laughed for 10 minutes straight. I was pretty short around that time, and Matthew had just had his growth spurt. To make a long story short, I was swimming in those clothes.*

I was now staring at myself in the mirror, wishing I had the chance to get use to the feeling of wearing his clothes.

"Okay! Time to remember an embarrassing night Gube!" I shouted, feeling far better now that I was in warm clothes. I plopped onto the seat, scooting next to Matthew. "Alright. Now what do you wanna know first?" I set my chin in the palm of my hand.

"So, what exactly is your definition of a lovey drunk?" He mimicked my position.

"A drunk who is very kind. They are constantly complimenting everyone around them and expressing their love and fondness. Can even turn a sad or angry drunk to a happy one." I shrugged.

"Okay, fair enough. What did I say that night?" I smiled evily.

"Ok, well, you told Brian that he was the coolest person ever. And Katie was labelled the funniest ever. You gave Mallory ten bucks for all the advice she had given you in the past. And you hugged Alex for around 5 minutes straight." The image of Matthew swaying with Alex was clear in my memory like it happened yesterday. He threw his head back him laughter, his face reddening with slight embarrassment.

"Did I say anything to you?" He stared into my eyes like he was going to find the words there before they came from my mouth. I rubbed my hands together.

"Uh, yeah. You told me that I was your favorite person in the whole world." He smiled at that. "And then I told you that you were a mess. But you informed me, so graciously, that you were *not a mess* and *totally coherent*. Then proceeded to say 'I love you so much! Look at you!' And you kissed my cheek." I could feel the blood rushing to my cheeks, I was now looking down at my hands.

"Well you are my favorite person in the world," He tilted my chin up with his hand. "still. Maybe I'm an honest drunk."

"What's that suppose to mean?" I cocked my head to the side.

"Maybe I'm an honest drunk who was just sober enough to be too nervous to kiss you on the lips?" It came out as a question, I wasn't sure if he was genuinly asking a question or he was saying that that is *exactly* what happened. I'm hoping for the latter.

"What do you-" I was interrupted by his hand grabbing my chin.

"Just shut up and kiss me." He brought my lips to his, and of course I didn't hesitate at all to kiss back.

I ran my hands through those curls that I loved so much. His hands gripped my hips as I leaned into him more, I was so afraid that this was going to be a dream.

Like it was so many other times.

As he pulled away I kept my eyes closed, still hoping that it actually happened.

"Hey, are you okay?" He patted the side of my face lightly.

"Yeah, more than okay. How long?"

"Since we were 20. You?"

"Sometime in middle school." I snickered.

"Well either way, far too long." He put his finger under my chin again, bringing me into another kiss.

*Thanks Ben*

#mgg #criminal minds #spencer reid #matthew gray gubler x reader #matthew gray gubler #matthewgraygubler #mgg fic #mgg fanfiction #mgg x reader #mgg fluff #MGG

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