#that poor JTE

[elibean]

I spent like an entire class talking abt pkmn names and how they’re different in eng and jp and it was excellent

[eparvierr]

i watched firebringer :)))

i ne need ti kiss jemilla or i fear i won't make it

i'm wathcing with the captions on WHYY is that dude named smelly-balls wtf?? nvm it just got explained. idk what i was expecting

"keeri just invented dancing" hell yeah !!!

nooo molag don't go i liked u :(

poor tiblyn imagine holding your arms up for your entire life cause someone told you that lowering them would have disastrous consequences. if this wasn't a comedy they really should've gone into the mental effects of that cause that cannot be healthy for the mind. in this essay i will—

at first i thought it'd be weird for my brain that there's a character named zazzalil but it's not that difficult actually. however i fear you and the chara may be melting togeher in my brain srry

keeri is so me you're so right we're so them we're literally them

i love the feathers on zazzalil's tunic ..,,,, (zazzalil (the character) angelkin headcanon ,,,, mayhaps)

"progress doesn't come from the dEsIrE tO uNdErStAnD like jemilla says. it comes from the need to be lazy." so correct actually

schwoopsie telling The Joke is almost indistinguishable from any random standup comedian on yourube shorts lol

"keeri?" "i'm ready!" sounds like. sounds like smth i'd do yeah. friends can always test their new inventions on me

took me a moment to realize the mammoth was speaking what jte what

"we could find someone to blindly follow together!" i if i may proposw,,,, hbc

i would never betray you like that

"it's the opposite, ice cream cones are cold and delicious" actually,,,,, i used to eat lit matchsticks as a kid. maybe. maybe that's why i turned out like i did (yes it fucking hurts idon't know why i kept doing that .i was a weird kid)

i thought snarl was gonna be something stupid like a fucken squirrel or smth boy was i wrong

"let's... eat... jemilla.?" fun fact the dutch people have actually eaten their prime minister (or some equivalent of that) before. in like the 1600s. i believe we're the only nation to have cannibalized our leaders so slayyy (literally)

because of the way the joke was set up of schwoopsie suggesting to eat jemilla,,, and then the way they all said "fuck her!" and keeri said "hey,, i got an idea" ,,,, i'm not even gonna say anything

keeri having a crisis over the environment is so relatable.

"no one is forcing anyone to drink water!" you tell 'em!!

noo keeri and zazz don't fight D:

MOLAG DOMT DONT ASACARE ME LIEWKETHATKAGAIN IWLIL DO HORRIBLE THIMSG TOYUI . jemilla... <3

i like grunt and emberly but i. have no thoughts about them

"i must be given a certain amount of luxury." L + ratio + don't care + didn't ask + your hat is ugly + i bet your duck fucking died + you talk weird + i bet you smell bad + your makeup is wonky + no one likes yiu

YES LIGHT HIS ASS ON FIRE

NOO they're fighting again :(

"all this can be yours all night every night" spit oit my drinmk you can;t jus say thatr

to me jemilla is the woman ever actually. peacemaker more like [CENSORED]

"neanderthals" WHAT. oh alrighty

AAHH name jumpscare

not snarl talking. i. wha t

huh. finally let my guard down now there's aliens? i. do not know what to make of this

chorn can sing DAMN consider me very impressed

i fear i may like firebringer more than hatchetfield. or at least an equal amount. is that. is that controversial

YIPPEEEEEEEEE YAYAYAYAYAYYATA IM SK GLAD YKY LIKED JT firebringer is my all time favorite . more than hatchetfield more than anything i love it i love ig i love it

[ramblinggaijin]

The question from the JHS 2nd yr textbook:

Why did the woman feel bad for the boy?

Student’s Written Answer:

He have no money in the poor.

Me & the JTE:

[pigeonneaux]

Yiff attaque!!!

I'll anihilate you

[nettlestonenell]

To clarify this scene (b/c Scientist Lee Gon–and his scientist Oemma–would want me to): Electricity, in and of itself, is not a chemical reaction; however, we do use chemical reactions to derive electricity. Ergo, the electricity generated in this reunion scene comes as a result OF CHEMISTRY.

The King: Eternal Monarch Catches Plenty of Hate Online Why That Is, And Why You Should Ignore It

(for @dumbassdictionarysds)

Part IV: Cries of “no chemistry” between the lead romantic pairing

Uuummmmm, okay? More than any other challenge I’m going to make, this one is the most difficult to refute, because I suppose it’s necessary to say (even though it feels to me like a person would have to be blind not to see the chemistry here) that when it comes to what couplings work for which viewers, ymmv. 

The King: Eternal Monarch’s romance plot, here, is the reverse of what one would see in most stories and shows. In kdramas, of course, it is almost universal that the lead romantic couple will have a childhood connection of some kind and have known each other if not outright have “dated” or whatever you want to call young children in precocious couplings declaring they are going to marry each other.

I don’t know, maybe you keep falling in love with a mermaid you met when your soul was a young boy’s and then a grown man’s hundreds and hundreds of years ago. Something like that…

While the time travel aspect of the show cleverly toys with these characters interacting in the past in very inventive ways [spoiler], again subverting expectations by turning them on their ear (b/c we’re dealing with a time loop), when the looping begins, they have no shared past.

Even so, enjoy these baby faces

And the romance plot is decidedly front-loaded. As the show goes on viewers get less and less time with Lee Gon and Jeong Tae-Eul together on-screen (as indeed, plot-wise the two see less and less of each other). It’s the first three or so episodes that see them share the most scenes (a reason this viewer perpetually goes back to rewatch their early moments together). That could frustrate viewers, but

In this story, the further in love these two fall, the further apart fate/the broken flute conspires to keep them.

The love plot is not allowed to overpower their responsibilities, and in fact that is a BASIC element of what the show is trying to present. Someone (was it bitchesoverdramas or kfangurl?) pointed out that it is remarkable (within the genre) how well it is shown that Lee Gon and Jeong Tae-Eul’s love story is not allowed to gobble up every moment of their lives. No, these two have responsibilities at every turn. 

For heaven’s sake, Gon is integral in running an entire country! Jobs and obligations that cannot be shirked get in the way of their throwing everything to the wind and being together. 

So much work to do! First, I will remove my entirely-for-show ‘I’m a handsome actor’ spectacles!

If you don’t understand that that’s literally a point the show is making, that commitments and duty—even filial responsibility–are essential complications of LG and JTE’s love story, and obviously if you really, really can’t see the pining, swoony but prickly-with-spiciness chemistry the two actors are able to put out there as their characters when they do share scenes, well, you’re going to hate this show.

*Please see also Subtitles? More like Sub-par-titles for additional thoughts on why the leads’ chemistry fails to spark for some viewers [TLDR: poor subtitling, subverted character expectations working against the challenge of reading an actor’s face whilst simultaneously reading the subtitles] 

On to Part V:  The King: Eternal Product Placement?

[clementineesotsm]

THE KING: ETERNAL MONARCH EP 15, My Appreciation and How It Made Me Feel

PM Koo teams up with LR. At least that is what PM was thinking. But for LR, slight different. He thinks PM will somehow give advantage for him but ended up disappointed, because PM cannot become a queen, and suspended as a PM. She cant even near a high position now. She cannot get Gon or Kingdom of Corea and that pisses LR off. PM become greedy and put her guard down. He thinks LR wanted a cooperation and inform him that she will take Gon’s flute for her. Which makes LR mad and choke her 🤣🤣 LR asking her to bring him into Gon’s mom mass memorial day and leave her

Gon is back to kingdom now. He hugs Lady Noh so tight 🥺 he is thankful to her for everything that she have done for him. Apparently Gon indebted to her much. I loved her punchline “i know pyeha / 압니다 폐하” means she understand things that Gon cant even / doesn’t have to explain. I love their relationship

Gon exiled Prince Buyeong’s son so that he cannot go back to Corea, because he found out that he is LR accomplice on the treason night. Gosh i hate that man!

Apparently Gon took KSJ to Corea to let him see his real mom. This scene was well made! Acting wise, amazing. KSJ lines, amazing. Music, amazing! Poor KSJ. He is also growing up becoming a stoic character 🥺🥺

Conversation between KSJ and Gon feels a bit heavy. Gon told KSJ about his plan, apparently he dont plan to save himself this time. The target is to get or kill LR. So Gon is planning to go and sacrifice himself for the good 🥺🥺 i loooove Gon’s facial expression here. And his eyes speaks his fear but also trying to accept his fate. Something like “sigh-ing”

LR was back to Korea to prepare his big plan. But unfortunately he let his guard down, SJH put poison in the food to kill herself basically. And LR minion couldn’t save her because Gon was set to cross the portal at that time so times stops. SJH was finally relief to be able to die, but here i am crying 🥺🥺 and her using LR punchline before while dying was cool thought by the writer! “Did you pray?” !!!

And did you realize? LR face most of the time was always stain with blood. Poor him 😅

Another appreciation was to the editing team, they did a great job in this scene. Especially for the scoring 💯💯💯

LR took his gun and run outside, then he met Gon!

LR “i even transcends death, but how is it that im unable to avoid you? How did you find me here?”

Gon “it would be good if it was me alone, but im not.”

“Some one sets the time (SJH)

Someone chases after you (i assume this was KSJ/the detectives)

Someone prays for you to get caught (this could be Lady Noh and JTE)

And someone is going to fight you (Gon, JY, KSJ) “

Then LR said that Gon should have wait him at the memorial not confront him here. This kind of storyline was fresh for me too. Because usually story like this always go with “make the doomed happen first then resolve it after” but with TKEM, the main character manage to prevent the doomed before it happened. Which im fine with it because its possible. But i kind agree with LR. Can we get that chaos in the mass memorial first then solve it? That would be epic. But then maybe they dont have enough time to explore that. Maybe in another timeline, reality or universe. But this is also satisfying and well done. If you can prevent it, why not? That is more work in a smart way.

Gon then took LR to bamboo forest to check on how to use the flute to travel back to 1994. What Gon knew, the flute need to be whole inside to do so. But then how to do it was a bit tricky. It needs both LR and Gon to be inside the space between 0 and 1. Because each of their blood soak into each of the flute. Gon was a bit in dilemma because he need someone to go inside the gate with LR in order for it to happen. What scary was nobody knew whats going to happen with that person if he succeeded or fail. All assuming that person will go inside and dead. Then KSJ volunteered to do so. OMFG! P.S then we also got a glimpse of the portal when the flute was whole. Kind of cool. If fills with so many universe and possible of eternity life !

SO THE LR INTERROGATION THAT WE SAW IN EP 1 WAS ACTUALLY FROM EPS 15! Wahh im impressed. I did not see that coming! Gon also doing his final honor for SJH and buried / burned her body properly (brb cry 😭) and to prepare if something bad happen he ask secretary Mo to announce that Se Jin (Prince Buyeong granddaughter) will be the first in line to replace Gon if something happen to him 🥺🥺 Secretary Mo and JY looks worried

Then something weird happened. Suddenly the flower that Gon gave to JTE on eps 10 disappeared. JTE worried that Gon already preparing for the reset and he will be gone forever from her memories 🥺 she comes to see LR and ask where is the flute? LR was pissed here, because he don’t understand why people are not scared and tend to give their lives away to make things right. He doesn’t understand love 🥺🥺 and LR was stays evil to the end because he kills Se Jin and swap PM Koo mother. Which is very scary! KGE, LJJ, LMH, JEC acting in this sequence was out of this world. The director and all team was making this sequence very well too. All the thrilled was there even though it was just a short scene each. I loved them more now but we are left with only 1 episode for the finale 🥺🥺🥺

In Korea, JTE released Luna. JTE have a planned to go with LR into the space between 1 and 0 because she is afraid if Gon will alone doing his duty 🥺 She basically ready to leave Korea forever because she asked Luna to take her place while she was gone. JTE asking Luna to steal LR to bring him to JTE and JTE come to KSJ to ask for the flute and let her replace him to do the duty. And it was the most heartbreaking conversation between this two friends and one of the most heartbreaking confession i have ever watched. I loved how they shot this scene, the camera seems to be shaking, i think its cool and also the way KSJ holds JTE hand 🥺🥺

Kudos to KGE and KKN here! Damn! Where is your daesang again?!

Finally here we saw that jacket of doomed which we saw on eps 1 and eps 10 worn by Gon. Its his ceremonial outfit that he supposed to wear during his most glorious moments. And him following his destiny to die for the sake of doing right things, teared me up. Before he go back to the past, he visit Lady Noh for a final goodbye, seriously i cried. He told Lady Noh about kim sowol poems, Gon knew that she was coming from Korea. Gon was also conveying his feelings to her “thanks to you, i can read such a beautiful poems”. Gon asked Lady Noh to let him go again and the way she said “if i let you go this time, will you ever comeback?” And cried, teared me up too. Meanwhile JTE also prepared to go with LR inside the portal, she is using the necklace from Gon, the one that has the symbol of Corea 🥺 its for her also her glorious moments. Surprisingly Gon going inside the portal not alone, JY was there to company him. As what he promised, he will be there in any battlefield Gon is about to go through 🥺🥺🥺

How it made me feel:

What a solid episode! This eps making my eyes swelled. It was full with bittersweet moments, thrilling moments, a lot of goodbyes, a lot of revelation, and it left me anxious for the finale. How can they solved this all? Can we still get a happy ending? Also this episode was so cool because the ending is the beginning. What we saw on eps 1 was actually a flashback! No wonder the screen size was different. Like what they usually used for past events! Cool!

What i also wants to appreciate is Kim Eun Sook writing skill. I have to admit im not a big fan of her, sometimes her script was a bit cheesy, overly dramatic and predictable. But since mr sunshine and especially TKEM she changed that all and turns out to be more mature. And darker? For me TKEM is focusing more on doing the right things, it has values more than just a rich boys/cool boys meets a cool ordinary girls and falls in love premise and finish. But this time its about true value of love, true value of relationship, about responsibility, vulnerability. At some point it reminds me of harry potter. TKEM gave me the same feelings/premise to while i was reading/watching HP. I loved how it turned out so far, its up to the finale. Will it be one of the best series i have ever watched? Or no?

Also, i really loved how KES writes KSJ character, he has so many reason to be bad. But he did not. I loved how she portrays a very good example of stoicism in his characters. Very good 💯

Another appreciation is for the directing and cinematography, guys, you blown me away!

[leeminomi]

Not Him being shy before eating her entire face whole!!!! And speeding up our heart rate!!!

Breaking news: I kid you not! This is the face of a man who is about to show you what he meant by “SCANDALOUS”

Now I gotta warn you because even while gazing at these pictures I felt my heart do all sorts of things! So don’t be scared if you start feeling things, this scene has special powers!

I can practically hear her moan!!!😰😰well i will moan on her behalf

Then his sly self kissing her with his eyes open just to note her reaction to the kiss!!! Hot damn! Like for whatever reason it made the scene so much hotter!Someone said this scene was PG!😂😂😂I really don’t think they understand the concept of PG but if this is their so called PG can I get a scene rated 13 next week with no parental guidance????

Guys!!! The look in their eyes!!! Does LMH and KGE just want me to completely stop living!?!?!!!

He literally just wants to eat her whole!! I don’t blame him but still!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!(insert camera shatter sounds from scandal then whisper SCANDALOUS)

My heart!!!! My poor heart!!!!! His hands were helping us understand how hungry and eager he truly was!!!!

Love her falling back on the bed!!!! Who the hell told them to cut this scene!!!!😰😰😰

All in all I am in love with them and there’s a line I saw in the preview of someone saying “I think I’m ....” and it was a girl and I hope it’s JTE saying she thinks she’s pregnant. I’m not messing around. We need an heir!

[maculate-mango]

The Cute Domestic Conversation That Needs to be Talked About More (2/3)

Back with part 2 :)

Though all she said here was one line, I’m gonna expand on it a little, in terms of my interpretation. For me, she had 3 different reasons for saying this because she didn’t bother to mention the future LG encounter. (So, dang, this mean she knew before LG about the possibility of time travel. Which may explain their first meet hug as seen in the Ep 13 preview.) 1. She really meant it. She really thought she wouldn’t see him again and she wanted him to know 2. Lowkey to see how he would react. I’m sure this was her backhanded way of double checking that the Lee Gon that left her with a goodbye kiss was not the current Lee Gon in front of her and 3. She so badly wants to believe the goodbye flower giving scene didn’t happen because it confirms her sad premonitions that they won’t last long. So she didn’t even mention it.

Okay so I know we all experienced JTE’s painful cry when she knew future LG coming to her probably meant she won’t ever see LG again...but it really just hit me. This poor girl really went through so much, not knowing whether she would ever see him again. And still, she was strong. (Once again, I LOVE how KES shows JTE.) And then there’s LG being his eloquently flirty self saying he’ll open all the doors in the universe to see her. But the thing is, he’s not kidding...he literally means it and I’m expecting to see him do it soon.

Honestly her “you have to” really caught me off guard. This is the strong-minded JTE we are talking about, and I love to see her opening up her love for LG. She’s just become a little more selfish in her love after the flower scene, telling him he has to find a way back to her. But every love has this level of selfishness, without it I would wonder if they really loved each other at all.

Love their banter despite the huge fight they just survived where he declared her the Queen of the Kingdom of Corea. But honestly speaking, how refreshing is it to watch a kdrama that doesn’t center on the couple’s possessiveness and jealousy?? Every time JTE or LG is jealous like this it’s only in a jokey manner. (Also they BEST not be killing off Eun-sup, I absolutely adore him 🥺)

LOVE that she brought up Yeong here. Man I really miss the Yeong-Lee Gon duo and I can tell Lee Gon misses him so hecking much. Bring them BACK without killing Yeong please. And now to wait for part 3, where I’ve got more to say about the only other soulmate of Lee Gon, Jo Yeong ☺️

[coreastories]

So not only are your stories SO WELL WRITTEN, it’s the well thought of details you include that made it so much fun to read. 1. Jangmi’s toothache 2. JTE climbing over to sit in the front seat (Queen status be damned) 3. Yeong’s ankle weakness 4. Poor front door 5. Gon and his love for JTE. I live for soft Gon. Is it possible that he looks at her with more love now because.. well... 🤰🏽. Haha. Once again, thank you for all that you do! We’re so lucky to be able to enjoy your talent! ❤️

😂😂😂 "Because well..."

That's a completely exposed horse now. 😂

Awww I love you and your reviews 🤗😘 Thank you right back!

I looove soft Gon. More of him to appear.

[nashvilletonihon]

To Stay Or Not To Stay...That Is The Million Dollar Question.

I’m currently sitting at my desk in the Kumihama teacher’s room. It’s Finals Week here so everyone is buzzing around and it sounds like a busy hive of bees. The students already look broken, defeated, tired. It’s been a long couple of weeks for me so I can only imagine what it’s been like for them.

I’m honestly not sure where October and November went. I remember being glad that September was over the minute it became October 1st and then suddenly I was celebrating Halloween with my ESS Club students and then it was November 1st. Now it’s 1 day away from my birthday (which I haven’t even thought about) and then it will be December 1st. 

What. Is. Happening??? 

When I first arrived here I thought time had literally stopped. I was stuck in an endless loop of being unhappy, lonely and sad I was drowning in my own misery. Fast forward to now. November 29th. In two short months I will have to give the JET Program and my contracting schools an answer to the question of whether or not I would like to re-contract. If I say yes, my schools will then have to decide whether or not they want to extend my contract for another year. If they do, I’d be working for them again during another trip around the sun. If they don’t...well, the decision to stay or go will have been made for me.

I’ve talked to my mom and a few close friends about my decision to potentially live in Japan for another year or to move back to the States. My mother encouraged me to make a Pros and Cons list. (Something I’ve always done when faced with major, life-changing decisions.) It’s currently taped to the back of my bedroom door and at the moment, both sides are neck and neck. Neither the Pros nor the Cons have advanced past the other. Hurray for me right? How does a list like that help when they’re dead even?! 

I think about what my life would be like in both scenarios. If I stay for another year I can continue to work toward my (absolutely insane) goal of eventually taking the JLPT N2. It’s an incredibly difficult test for non-native speakers that requires A LOT of work to pass. One of my friends and fellow JET’s is getting ready to take it this Sunday. She studied Japanese for four years in college AND studied abroad here and even she’s worried passing it. I wonder if I could accomplish my goal in another year and a half. If I worked my a** off, I bet I could. I at least want to take and pass the N3. (Which I’m pretty sure I can do.) That being said, if I pass the N2 I could get a job as a translator or interpreter which is something I would really enjoy doing. I could translate anime or manga or work for the government or tourism board in cities like Los Angeles, New York, Chicago, Seattle, etc... Living in Japan for another year would allow me to continue to be exposed to native speakers and Japanese every single day. The minute I move back to America I no longer have that luxury. Even though I’ve only been here for 4 months my comprehension and understanding has grown exponentially. I would be jeopardizing all of the hard work I’ve put in up ‘til now. 

A major Con of continuing to live in Japan is being away from my family and friends for another year. I video chat with my momma every single day and it always pains me to have to talk to her through a phone screen. I miss being able to hop in my car and drive the 2 1/2 hours to Indiana to see her whenever I wanted. Now we constantly have to coordinate when we both have free time to talk. Being 15 hours ahead of her in the States (thaaaaanks Daylight Savings) makes things difficult, but we manage. I miss her hugs. I also struggle a lot with the fact that I am losing out on valuable time with my grandparents. I know they won’t be around forever and the guilt associated with being over here while they continue grow older is more than I can put into words. I know my family is proud of me for following my dreams but that doesn’t make being over here any easier.

Another Con (or Pro depending on how you look at it) is that I have ZERO job prospects moving back to America. Absolutely nothing. In theory I could pick up over hire work in theatre at TPAC, Nash Rep, Studio Tenn or advertise myself as a costume designer (a position I have long had a love/hate relationship with) but to be completely honest, none of that sounds very appealing right now. I’m tired of living paycheck to paycheck and constantly being worried about if I’ll be able to afford rent (we all know how ridiculous it is to live in Nashville now) or make my car payment. Yeah, yeah I know. ‘’That’s what being involved in the arts is all about! You have to suffer for it!’’ Whoever thought that was a good excuse for people to live a stressful, poor lifestyle just so they can follow their passion can shove it. It’s ridiculous we even have to do that in the first place. Yes, I want to act. Yes, it’s my everything. Yes, it’s what I am good at. But I don’t want to constantly have to struggle when I could work toward a job that I can make good money doing while ALSO acting. Is that me selling out to have a secure day job and moonlight as an actor? Maybe. I’ll be 29 on Friday. If I stay another year in Japan I’ll turn 30 here. It’s hard to believe I’m so close to being out of my twenties already. While I feel the proverbial clock ticking when it comes to the stereotypical “old actress” trope, I have to remind myself that most well-known actors didn’t even get started until their mid-30′s. I’ve got time. And being bilingual will look really cool on my resumé.

So what’s another Pro about continuing to live in Japan? Saving more money, yo. Being here for another year means more savings in the bank. It’s a pretty simple concept that would allow me to not freak out about finances when I finally move back to the States. As someone who had an incredible amount of financial stability when I lived in Los Angeles to being left with nothing after I moved to Nashville, financial stability is now incredibly important to me. (I can hear my father slow clapping from 11,000 miles away.) I’m not one for caring about money (never have been) but if I could keep adding to the savings account while also working toward a career that would help me in the long run, I’ll take that option time and time again.

Another Pro I often think about is how many more people can come to visit Japan while I’m here. My Mom, sister (Elizabeth) and friends Taylor and Erica are all coming out to visit me in the months of February and March. If I’m here for another year, even MORE people can come on out to see what this crazy magical country is all about. I think that’s pretty dang cool and am 100% encouraging everyone I know to start looking at flights now. I mean, you’ve got a personal tour guide AND a place to stay!!! What more could you need/want?! 

All in all I have quite a few Pros and Cons on the list. Some of the Cons are dependent on whether or not I can somehow change them into Pros. One example would be the immense distaste I have for my base school. I am there every Monday, Wednesday and Friday. Out of those three days I might be fortunate enough to attend (not teach, mind you) 2 classes, possibly 3. Classes are 50 minutes each if we don’t have a special shortened schedule. So out of 3, 8 hour work days, I am maybe seeing the inside of a classroom for less than 3 hours each week. Compare that to my visit school where I am there on Tuesdays and Thursdays. I have 3 or 4 and sometimes 5 classes a day. I am waaaaay happier at my visit school. I found out that I can talk to my scheduling supervisors to potentially get my schedule switched so that my visit school becomes my base school and my base school becomes my visit school. This would drastically improve my outlook on the situation as a whole. Don’t get me wrong, I enjoy the other teachers at my base school (even though I don’t really talk to many of them and vice versa) and they’re all incredibly nice people. I just seem to click better with the teachers at my visit school.

Throughout all of the anxiety, worrying, stressing out and continual ‘’Should I or shouldn’t I’s’’, I have to keep telling myself that ultimately, it’s my decision and mine alone. Will it affect the people close to me? Oh, without a doubt. I know my family will hate to have me away for another year. I run the risk of being forgotten in the Nashville theatre and losing another year of shows. I already feel like my career was just beginning to take off and the desire to follow through with that is one of the strongest pulls back home yet. And then again...I have this intense desire to learn Japanese. REALLY learn it. I want to communicate with my friends, co-workers and the people who have helped to make the adjustment to life in Japan a little bit easier. I want to help Americans visit Japan and not be scared to do so because of the language barrier. Trust me when I say that the the people here are more scared to use English than you are to use Japanese.

I have a lot to think about over the next 2 months, but if I’m being completely honest (and I try to be on here), I am about 90% sure I will stay for another year. I don’t think my work in Japan is done yet. I think I can help more students, engage more cultural exchanges, help the current JTE’s teach their classes more efficiently and help infuse fun ways of learning into the mundane textbook lessons. I want to start a pen-pal exchange with the girls in my English Speaking Society Club with students from my aunt’s high school in Indiana. There is so much I want to do...and 8 more months just isn’t enough time to do it all.

Before I end this, it’s important to me that I thank the countless people, both family members and friends, who have listened to my doubts, fears, concerns and indecision about all of this over the past month. Your unwavering support and constant encouragement mean so much to me. I honestly wouldn’t still be here without your love and kindness. I am truly, truly grateful to have each and every one of you in my life, both here and abroad. Y’all the real MVP’s. 

I’m sorry there aren’t any photos in this post. I’m heading to Kyoto City tomorrow for a Skills Conference and will be there all weekend. I’m going sightseeing and Christmas shopping and will be taking lots of photos so I will have plenty to write about come next week. On that note I will wrap this up and say goodbye for now. I keep telling myself I’ll be better at updating and posting and I swear I will start now. Thanks for always being patient with me!!

じゃあまた (See you!)

- レイチェル (Rachel)

[bonesmakenoise]

It wasn’t a bad day, it was just long and weird and my poor youngest brand new JTE has not had experience at this school yet and he brings up really excellent points but I’m so worried for him because like... 

He reminds me of a brand-new ALT who comes from a teaching background. Lots of grand ideas, lots of confusion as to why we do it this old way when we should/could be doing it this other way, but hasn’t seen exactly how the students will react to something. Amazing ideas in theory. Really, amazing ideas in practice, too.... at another school. I’m working on getting them to not hate English. He’s thinking about making them fluent in English. And there are two schools of thought here: throw them into the deep end and see if they can swim, or gently guide them through shallow and slightly deeper waters and if they want to explore that deep end, they’ll already have the tools for swimming without really even realizing it. 

I don’t have a solution about it. I agree with him on everything he’s saying in theory. I want him to reassess in September after he understands the level the kids are working at a little better. 

[jeshikawa]

I know I post a lot of cute stories about work but the reality is, I have shit days too. Today was honestly my worst day so far and after reflecting on it after the fact, I’m not completely satisfied with how it’s being handled and I’m going to approach my JTE about this. I’m glad that my problem today is being addressed and taken seriously but the reality is, I can’t settle for the passive “we’ll scold the student and let it go” approach. It isn’t enough. 

I’m going to ask to speak generally to the class that offended me today and I’m going to tell the JTE that if something like what happened today ever happens again, I won’t tolerate it anymore. Period. I don’t have to “gaman” when I genuinely feel disrespected and hurt. I truly don’t want to punish the other ~35 kids in the class because of a handful offensive trolls and that’s the only reason I’ve put up with it as long as I have. But in the future, if the problem isn’t going to be handled directly to the point the students in question don’t learn about why their behavior is inappropriate and offensive and the teachers are only going to passively address it, I don’t have to be there. I can teach a more respectful class. 

I’ve taught in Title 1 schools in some of the worst parts of a poor education system and even my most disrespectful students in the US knew better than to treat me the way I was treated today. I’m legitimately hurt by an incident in class today and had to cry about it after I processed my feelings properly. I got through the day thinking I wasn’t going to let one class get to me and that it could be worse but what happened today was honestly hurtful and I can’t accept it. What happened was hurtful and insensitive and offensive as fuck and its okay to be mad and its ok to be sad but it’s not okay for me to let it go.

[ramblinggaijin]

We had our practice volleyball game tonight cuz we have our annual Teachers vs the PTA Volleyball Tournament later this week. Went like this:

Principal:

My poor JTE:

The more athletic members of the team:

Me and the teacher who aren’t on great terms atm due to some personal issues between us that I’m not gonna detail here, but we definitely are not speaking much anymore:

Seriously we kept getting placed next to each other during the practice matches cuz we somehow had good coordination, much to our mutual chagrin. Not awkward at all.

[di-elle]

Oh dear poor little prince!!! So heartbreaking.

Adding a screncap of your tags because everyone needs to read it.

Re: I'm your Oppa line, we now know thanks to you , it's what he says to JTE in person too, during the arrest scene, so is it a nice continuity in the show.

Thank you for reporting from novels!

Tkem novelization pt 2

« The night the flute broke » 

>> Lee Lim is described as someone devoid of any feelings, truly cunning, a radical opposite of his brother in law, described as someone inherently good.

>> When Lee Lim stabs Lee Ho (Gon’s dad) with the Four Tiger Sword, Lee Ho feels every inch of the weapon piercing his abdomen in excruciating pain.

>> Meanwhile, Lee Lim feels exhilarated.

>> He actually relishes in the fact that Lee Ho is and has always been weak / clueless.

>> However, he feels impressed by Gon. 8-year-old Gon, huddled by his murdered father’s side, clothes soaked in his father’s blood, swallowing back his tears despite this traumatic scene.

>> Lee Lim thinks that Gon might actually be better / more worthy than the late King. But it doesn’t matter. Since he’s going to kill him too.

>> When Gon picks up the four tiger sword, he thinks back to that moment, not long ago, when his Dad explained to him what the four tiger sword meant. He remembers his dad’s loving, warm voice, explaining how the four tiger sword symbolized the royal power / responsibilities. That only Kings of the royal family could wield this sword. Lee Ho taught his son that one day, he would have to keep it safe, to honor this responsibility.

Gon never thought that this day would come so soon.

>> While he says this line, Gon is silently praying for someone to come and help him: « Please, is there someone, anyone out there ? » (poor bb 😭)

>> « No one, no one is coming » he thought with a sinking feeling, as his breathing got more labored, oxygen starting to lack in his brain, his uncle’s hands tightening his grip on his neck.

>> Even as a kid, Gon has always thought that the discovery of Lee Lim’s body on the shores of Busan was strange. Absurd even. It was a feeling he couldn’t shake, still 25 years after. He doubted his death. Did he really die by suicide that day?

>> THIS LINE ISN’T IN THE BOOK.

Which either means:

It was added in the script

LMH improvised and made up the line on the go

(By the way, the subtitles says « I’m older than you now », but in Korean he says « Looks like I’m an Oppa now ». Which basically means the same thing but with different nuances.)

>> Chapter 3 is titled: The parallel world

[pixelatedlenses]

Rainy Days in Fukushima

It’s strange to think that we start back to school next Wednesday. This summer vacation was a lot different: last year, I was so anxious because it was my first time living outside the states. I remember there were a lot of teary nights in those first two months: I kept questioning if I’d made a good choice. I worried if I was the right person, if they’d actually chosen me, or if at some point, I’d be back on a palne home to Japan within those first few months, unable to make it. I think, perhaps, maybe some part of me hadn’t let go of this being a dream.

A year later, it’s still a little bit of a dream, but it feels a lot more real. I appreciate my day to day life. I thought a lot about my year on my recent trip, and honestly... I do still genuinely like my job. I feel bad knowing that next year, a lot of my friends will be gone because they had poor placement: that’s the biggest job killer for ALTs, I think. However...

Even with all of the recent stress and worry, with a good deal of being absolutely exhausted, and coping with re-engaging myself with things simply for me, I still feel I made a good choice.

Genuinely, I do. I’ll probably breakdown my reflection of thi past year since I’ve had all my goal-setting meetings.

(I’m definitely getting the tired that my seniors feel: it’s a different kind of exhaustion, one that I’ve never really felt. I’ve definitely fallen into the trap of not doing anything for myself on the weekends otehr than errands, and starting this weekend, I’m going to fi that. I’ve got a nice, free J-Pop concert at fukushima Station i’ll be going to, and plans to have small treats for myself at the end of each week again. Gotta keep up )

I wonder what this term will bring? It should be easier: I’ve gone through it once, and the teachers are really enthusiastic for some of the more creative ways I’m going to use to help students remember English. Between games shows and movies, outdoor activities and inside study, I’m really aiming to help the students have fun ths term. 

Certainly, I’ve got a few emails to send out to some teachers that gave me trouble this term -no more sending me emails the day of my visit: if you don’t send it 24-36 hours before to, then I’m not going to have a plan unless yit was already created; its not fair to ask me to prep for 40 students in hours. It’s not going to be anyone’s best work- but on by the by, I’ve got a good crew of JTEs who genuinely want to use Engish and want to encourage students to use it too.

(Let me say that nothing in this job is perfect: as much as I love what I’m doing and really enjoy it, I’m still adjusting to living abroad. I’ll admit to being really exhausted recently, and that’s started leaking a bit into my job, but I also think catching it early is going to be my best move yet. I do think I’m done trying to overextend myself at this job: we’re going to have to lay down some more clear borders and draw some lines in the sand, specifically at my visit schools. I can’t keep worrying about not receiving contact for weeks between visits: if I’m commit to teaching, then I need a commitment to respecting my time too, even though I believe their actions are largely unintentional.)

I think that this term is going to be something that brings new change though. I’m starting my TEFL soon, which will help me in the Now and in my Future. I’m studying again, seriously, for my JLPT. Now that I’ve made my list too, I’ve got a bit of a guide to what I’m aiming for.

Now it’s just time to do.

Especially since that JLPT ain’t gonna pass itself. I sense that all my printables will actually be used in the next few weeks. Thank goodness I’ve got two Japanese teachers right next to me!

Anyways, I’ve spent too much time in bed being warm, so it’s time to get up, pack the backpack, and head off to the West! Have a good day everyone: hopefully, it’s not too hot in your neck of the woods either!

[nettlestonenell]

Part Two: 

Ardent Human Desire vs. Fate and the Manpasikjeok OR Why Are There So Many Obstacles Between Lee Gon and Jeong Tae-Eul’s Ultimate Reunion?

If you haven’t, please go back and read Part One: Questions About the Flute OR User Manual, Manpasikjeok Edition

Let’s agree to a few things to start, here.

1.       In a parallel universe, everyone has a counterpart/doppelganger.

2.       In TKEM’s version of this, your counterpart/doppelganger shares not only your birthday and therefore your age, but also your exact genealogy—which is to say you have the same parents, grandparents, bloodline across each universe. In TKEM this means you will have the same family name (Jo, Lee, Jeong, Myeong) across all possible universes, though your first names will change depending on your iteration. This also means that you are fated to be with the same family/lover/spouse across all possible universes. This is pre-appointed and applies to everyone. *exception: as the worlds begin to show their cracks, Jo Yeong’s parents have divorced, while Jo Eun-Sup’s stayed together, and have had twins. (The finale, when the worlds are again harmonized, reunites Jo Yeong’s parents and they do have twins, which seems to signal that this was their proper Fate)

3.       Episode 16, the series finale, seems to really muddy the waters of #2 in a way that I probably lean toward being sloppy consistency rather than deliberate revoking of world-building absolutes [Example: Jo Yeong’s parents are together in 2022 and have twins, but those children would be several years younger than their Republic counterparts (who are said to be starting Kindergarten at that same time), which is…not parallel universes in balance? It would signal exactly the opposite—that time and life flows entirely differently in each universe after repairing the flute…and 1:1 doppelgangers are no more--which is maybe yet another post needed to ponder that on…]

If we take on #2, we are left asking ourselves about three particular characters and their doppelgangers: Lee Gon/Lee Ji-Hyun, Jeong Tae-Eul/Luna, and Kang Sin-Jae/Kang Hyeon-Min

Across all universes, how are they fated to hook-up? OR Who is Jeong Tae-Eul’s true, fated love across all universes in the mind and will of Manpasikjeok?

Is it Jeong Tae-Eul/Luna, and Kang Sin-Jae?

For example, if Shin-Jae of the Kingdom is fated for Luna, and vice versa, and he’s been taken to the Republic (against the will of the flute), he can’t be with Luna. BUT, if that is the fate, that those two are to be together--especially to have a child--then it translates across all parallel worlds, and means that Jeong Tae-Eul is meant for Kang Hyeon-Min, yes? The two Republic-based iterations. This also would illuminate two other things:

1.       The fact that Sin-Jae "has feelings for” Tae-Eul. She’s not the “right” iteration for him (he’s Kingdom and she’s Republic), but she’s the closest he can get to the satisfaction of his heart, in a frustrated Fate.

2.      It could be suggested -- Did you ever notice that the youth embodiment of the flute appears at least twice in situations that throw KSJ and JTE even closer together? In one, he’s leading that group of high schoolers past the TaeKwonDo center where KSJ first sees Tae-Eul, and in another he’s bullying KSJ so that JTE fights for KSJ. It doesn’t seem coincidental to me that the flute makes an appearance trying to throw these two together—even though they’re the wrong match. Poor thing, it’s trying, in its broken state, to still do its job, to still steer fate.

3.       But yet, Tae-Eul never--even long before meeting Lee Gon--has romantic feelings for Sin-Jae.

4.       And what we’re shown in the final episode of the series between Sin-Jae and Luna in the Kingdom could at best be called pre-romantic. (and more likely be termed platonic) Their relationship mirrors the JTE/KSJ relationship in the Republic, of her hyung-nim well before Lee Gon appeared, before KSJ expressed that he had feelings for her.

Is it Jeong Tae-Eul and Kang Hyeon-Min?

If it’s meant to be JTE and Kang Hyeon-Min as a fated couple, that’s impossible, as KHM has been rendered comatose in a way that we’re not shown is related to either the Traitor or the Treason. We are shown in Episode 16 what was “supposed” to happen was that he would NOT be struck by the car—his original fate doesn’t hold, there, and as such, his character in 2022, now a chaebol, is removed entirely from JTE’s circle of acquaintance. I’d say, importantly, in the Episode 16 re-set (pre-LG’s return), she not only never looks him up, she never encounters him, which if he were her fate or her potential fate, she surely would have.

Is it Jeong Tae-Eul and Lee Ji-Hyun?

I confess this is where my money is. Of course, Lee Ji-Hyun, in the Traitor’s made-over version of the Republic, dies at age 8, so JTE would never have met him, and therefore I posit would have lived as a single, childless woman until her death in that version of the Republic. (Without the LG re-set)

(Had she not met Lee Gon) I believe that JTE and LJH were fated, in the will and agenda of the flute. They are its preferred match.

What about Lee Gon, then? Who for him?

Remember, in Episode 16, Luna gets a found-family re-set, and PM Koo is jailed after some political intrigue (though not having risen as high as PM). While Lee Gon would not likely have met Luna 1.0 the street rat, it’s not impossible to think that he might, at some function or another, have met a politician’s sibling who was college-educated and working as a civil servant.

I choose to believe that all versions of JTE and LG are fated to be lovers and ultimately parents to children. It is only Lee R/Lim’s cockblock that makes it impossible for the Republic’s iteration of JTE to meet Lee Ji-Hyun, dead aged 8. 

Which is where Ardent Human Desire comes into play in altering Fate.

What is Ardent Human Desire when we’re talking about Fate?

Let me direct you to a little moment in a show called Goblin/Guardian: The Lonely and Great God, written by Kim Eun-Suk, the writer of TKEM. 

A moment of set-up: the Grim Reaper has a tea room behind a solid (to living human eyes) wall. In it he entertains dead souls before they leave this world. In one episode, a living human man comes through the door, begging for a bathroom. Both Goblin and Reaper are stunned: no one living should be able to come through that door, much less see it. It’s not their Fate. Fate is unchangeable, right? But after directing the living man (in pain from a need for the toilet), they muse that ardent human desire can perhaps open any door (alter any assigned fate). [Something Goblin is eager to accomplish, subverting fate]

Seeing as it’s from the same author’s mind, I’d argue that that concept comes into play in TKEM, too.

From the Night of the Treason forward, Lee Gon has an ardent human desire to find JTE. Not Luna. No, he wants to meet the woman from the Republic who’s a police officer. That’s 25 years of a (let’s be clear: non-sexual, non-romantic at the time) persistent desire that never lessens, never fades. Furthermore, it’s a desire of the king who’s a potential player of the flute, of the growing child who heard the flute call to him. Of the man who chooses ultimately to retrieve the flute whole at ultimate personal risk (and risk, even, to his relationship with JTE, the object of his Ardent Human Desire).

And the flute tests him—in fact, I will argue with you all night and into the weekend that what we’re shown of him opening every door in the universe is just that: a test by Manpasikjeok. “Are you sure she’s what you really want?” it’s asking him. “How far will you go to find her? How many iterations of her happy can I show you until it lessens your desire for her? Until you give in?”

I think it’s terribly important that in no iteration does LG find a JTE doppelganger that’s in a bad situation, in need of rescuing. [Case in point: Luna 1.0 street rat--he’s allowed to see nothing similar] He expressly tells JTE that she is happy every time he finds a version of her. And yet, because of how fate works in TKEM’s universes, he likewise never finds her married or involved with anyone, or with children—because, as Part One laid out: if one Lee Gon/JTE has children (same birthdays)/hooks up with their fate, then ALL iterations of Lee Gon/JTE have children (same birthdays)/have hooked up with their fate--particularly once the timeline and flute have been repaired.

We know that if those JTEs had met their LG iterations they would have AT LEAST recognized our LG’s face when he presented himself. But they don’t. Nope. She is always employed, always still living in the same building with one, if not two, parents. Because of that we’re never shown that LG has trouble locating her (as JTE did in the Kingdom locating her mother, checking their address, b/c there her parents were both dead).

This shot will never look above-board.

To think about how these/this situation works, keep in mind that last leap during their epilogue dating trips—where LG had just left the Kingdom and they were blipped back there only minutes later. The flute, in its whole form, is clearly controlling where they are sent and when (and perhaps that’s a different post, too, about how the flute is preparing/teaching Lee Gon to be its eventual player). The flute, when whole, controls where you end up. It’s not a transporter where you dial up your destination, it’s spinning a roulette wheel if the roulette wheel is fixed by the House.

Here, in the immediate wake of resetting the night of the Treason, the flute is actively NOT LETTING Lee Gon get to JTE. It is MAKING HIM open every door in the universe, seeing if he will persist, showing him what it wants him to see. (Her happy and at peace, not in need of him.) The flute is trying to see if it can convince Lee Gon to let her go since, as they are from two different worlds, they are not each other’s assigned fate.

Obviously, showing him a JTE in straitened circumstances would only encourage him to find her. That’s not going to lessen his desire, so the flute doesn’t go that route. Instead, it shows JTE with purpose, first (I think) as an airline pilot, then a soldier, a graduate of the police academy, and finally as some version of an ‘Idol’ (I think.) [*All positions that also do a surprisingly good job of showing qualities that would sync well with being the Queen of the Kingdom, so perhaps the flute is a little conflicted about JTE as well…]

And what’s more, during this time, as LG is opening every door in the universe (and also, I assume, only being able to venture into the liminal space and leave the Kingdom occasionally b/c he’s still got King Work to do), the flute decides to put someone directly in bitterly lonely Tae-Eul’s path as well.

And it’s not to break her heart (nor viewers’). 

Think about when she encounters Lee Ji-Hyun on the street. On my original views it seemed to me that he didn’t take any notice of her at all (she is, at her height, well out of his line of sight), but upon closer re-watch he DOES actually have a second of looking at her. It’s not extended eye contact, and maybe not direct eye contact at all, but he does see her. In this, the flute gives Tae-Eul the chance to see her original, pre-LG fated love. And what does it have him dressed in, just for her sake?

That’s right: his military uniform. It’s not the same coat Lee Gon wore when washing rice, that was white—but it’s the black one he and Yeong are wearing in their selfie. “Here he is,” the flute/Fate seems to be saying to her, “he could be yours if you’ll only accept him.”

[*It is also perhaps because Lee Ji-Hyu- iterations are serving his military service that the other JTE-iterations have not met him yet in the other parallel universes]

But the Ardent Human Desire of these two lovers refuses to be swayed, even after a year of separation and total ignorance of each other’s post-reset situations. Persistent. Ardent. Human. Desire.

The flute is indebted to both of them. They each took steps that culminated in a destiny/fate they each chose to embrace (to use Prince Buyeong’s words). They sacrificed their own Ardent Human Desires to fix the timeline and the parallel universes while knowing it might well separate them forever from that which they desire (the exact opposite of villainous Lee R/Lim’s actions). [In fact, making  ultimately Kingly choices, shows of wisdom and worthiness.]

The King Lee Gon chose for not only his subjects, but also the citizens of the Republic, and the future Queen JTE chose to brave the liminal space with Lee R/Lim for her love, the King.

And in the wake of that, fate—and the Manpasikjeok—agreed to bend.

Which is why LG and JTE then become what is fated.