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luvhaos · 2 years ago

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the language of flowers | lsm

pairing: lee seokmin x f! reader genre: flower shop! au (seventeen), tattoo shop! au (nct), rivalry (slightly subverted), fluff, angst, comedy word count: 10.0k summary: you have a big, fat crush on the owner of the flower shop across the street but there are two pretty big problems: you’re pretty certain he has a girlfriend and both of your staff hate each other’s guts. warning(s): cursing, very suggestive content (tipsy almost-sex, sexual references and allusions, etc.), reader has some tattoos, insults and slander between both shops (everyone kind of acts like a jerk to one another), seokmin lifts reader off the ground, unedited author’s note: wow, this was a doozy! i didn’t expect it to get this long tbh and i definitely should have been working on a paper instead of writing this but seokmin has really been hitting different to me recently, so this was born out of that! playlist: fallin’ flower by seventeen • call out my name by the weeknd • take a chance on me by niki • tattoos together by lauv • la vie en rose by édith piaf

You weren’t sure when the whole Neo Tattoos and Piercings versus Fallin’ Flower rivalry happened but what you were a hundred percent sure about was that it started with Donghyuck. You loved him like a little brother but you knew it had something to do with one of the flower shop employees spilling something on Donghyuck one day when he was in a foul mood. And Donghyuck in a bad mood was something none really wanted to deal with.

Or maybe it started when Doyoung made some off-handed comment about how little effort it took to create wedding bouquets versus tattooing and piercing.

Or maybe it was because Yuta and Mark laughed very loudly when one of the flower shop workers, you were pretty sure his name was Hansol, pulled on their push door.

Okay, maybe you weren’t a hundred percent sure how this mess all started.

You did think the owner, Lee Seokmin, was pretty cute though. He had been extremely friendly the first day he had opened his store, coming across the street to introduce himself and you welcomed him to the neighborhood. You even invited him to grab some lunch the next day and that meal together had you smitten, embarrassingly so.

So this supposed ‘rivalry’ between your store really threw a wrench in your plan to ask him out.

“Do you see this shit?” growled Donghyuck as he practically flung the door to your shop open. “They’re opening a cafe in that flower shop!”

“Seriously?” Mark asked, rushing to your storefront to peer out. “Oh, shit, they are!”

“Did you think I was lying?”

“I don’t know, Hyuck, you kind of have a track record for that.”

“Fuck you, Mark Lee, this is why you get no bitches.”

“Fuck you, I do get bitches!”

“Children, children, calm down,” Johnny cooed mockingly. You caught Taeil’s eye and you both rolled your eyes.

“Doyoung, what’s on schedule for today?” you asked and your staff quieted down to listen to Doyoung, one of your receptionists and schedulers along with Jungwoo and Taeil.

“Johnny, Chanyeol’s coming in today to finish his tattoo at ten-thirty. Taeyong, you’ve got two new clients at eleven and at three today; the first one’s not sure what she wants so you’ll have to help her with that. Jaehyun’s got a helix piercing at one, and Yuta has a septum piercing a two, another one twenty minutes later, and then a belly button piercing at four. Mark, you’re shadowing Yuta—”

Yuta cheered a little, lunging at Mark and squeezing him in a hug. You all snickered at the way Mark flailed a little before wrapping his arms around Yuta to return the embrace. “—and Donghyuck, you’re with Johnny today.” Doyoung pointed at you and said, “Soojin’s coming into get a tattoo at eleven today too.”

You grinned at Taeyong and Johnny. “Guess we’ll be working side-by-side today.” They smiled back at you, Johnny opening his mouth to say something but there was a knock at your door and everyone looked up, faces immediately darkening.

Seokmin stood outside, unperturbed by the glares coming his way, and you rolled your eyes at your staff members as you walked over to the door and stepped out. “Hey!”

“Hi!” Seokmin chirped. He jabbed his thumb back at Fallin’ Flower. “We just opened a coffee shop inside so I wanted to bring you something to try. You like an iced latte, right?”

“I can’t believe you remembered,” you said as he handed you an iced latte and a slice of cinnamon coffee cake wrapped in wax paper. “Thanks so much, this was so sweet.” He slipped a single flower in with his gifts.

“What’s this?” you asked, wiggling the flower in your hand.

“A white gardenia,” Seokmin said. “We just got some in today.”

“It’s beautiful, thank you. You’re really too sweet,” you said, feeling your face warm.

He chuckled and you could have sworn his ears were pink. “You deserve it all,” he said.

Someone cleared their throat behind you and you peeked over your shoulder to see Jaehyun leaning against the closed door. Even with his arms crossed, it was clear he was trying to make himself look larger and more intimidating, which was a pretty simple feat for Jaehyun given that he was already both of those things to a lot of people. He frowned and said, “We should get ready for opening.”

Seokmin chuckled, taking a step back from you. “I got it,” he said. “We should get ready to open too.”

“I’ll see you around,” you said. Seokmin nodded and smiled brightly, which had your heart thumping.

Jaehyun snorted and you glared at him. “What is your problem?”

“What’s my problem?” he asked. “You’re fraternizing with the enemy.”

“How is the flower shop an enemy? We don’t even have the same clients.”

Jaehyun huffed and didn’t respond, electing to open the door and let you duck under his arm to go back inside. Yuta scoffed, “Who does he think he is?”

“Right?” Jungwoo grumbled.

“Okay, everyone’s got to lay off them,” you said.

“We’ll back off when they do,” hissed Donghyuck. “That Chan fucker said our shop always looked dirty yesterday.”

“And what’s-his-face… Soonyoung said tattoo artists—”

“I couldn’t care less about what they said,” you said. “I told Jae this outside already — we don’t share the same clients, so there’s no loss of revenue. I know that there have been incidents in the past that have bred some weird hatred but I need you all to be professionals like I know you all are. No more of this today, do I make myself clear?”

“Yes, ma’am.”

“Good. We’re opening in five, so everyone should get to their stations and get ready.”

Everyone scuttled off to where they needed to go and you sighed, sitting at your station and setting your coffee and the flower aside. You practically inhaled the coffee cake Seokmin gave you. It was perfect, just the right amount of sweetness without it being overpowering. You took another bite and sipped a bit of your coffee and you finally understood why coffee cake was called coffee cake. The pairing was heavenly.

“You sure he didn’t poison that?” Johnny asked. You gave him an exasperated look and he said, “I’m kidding… mostly.”

He said, “We’re not doing it to cause trouble. We’re just protective of one another and of the shop.”

You ran a hand down your face. “I know, I know. And I’m sure the guys across the street are the same.”

Johnny shrugged and you said, “I just need you guys to tone it down. We can’t have this petty feud hurt business.”

“We’ll be on the best behavior we can be.”

You said, “You realize that that’s not a high bar, right?”

Johnny laughed and Taeil led Chanyeol inside for the first appointment of the day.

Before you knew it, you were sitting on your stool, bent over Soojin’s arm as you did the linework for her new tattoo — the moon with some stars dotted around it. She was talking with you as well as Chanyeol and Johnny at the station beside you. You half-listened to her and Chanyeol talk about a concert they were both at the night before but didn’t know the other was there while you listened to Taeyong patiently talk through the steps of getting a tattoo to his new client.

You rolled your chair over to take a sip of your coffee quickly before resuming Soojin’s tattoo. She asked, “Is that from the new cafe in the flower shop?”

“Yeah!”

“I was thinking of going over there after my tattoo. Do you like their stuff?”

The shop went eerily quiet with only the buzzing of yours, Taeyong, and Johnny’s tattoo guns making any noise. Yuta and Jaehyun had stopped chatting, and Donghyuck and Mark stopped bickering. You felt your eye twitch. Were they all fucking serious?

“Yeah, I really like it,” you said and you heard a sharp inhale of breath a few feet behind you. “And the owner is lovely.”

Something like a snort came from the corner. You focused only on Soojin and said, “I definitely think you should check it out.”

“I think I will,” she said, “because I’m really jealous of your coffee.”

“You can take a sip if you want?”

“Really? Can I?”

“I’ve injected ink into your skin for hours, Soojin, I’d say we’re good enough friends for you to share a drink.”

She giggled and reached over with the arm that wasn’t getting tattooed to take a sip. “Shit, this is good.”

You hummed in agreement and looked over your shoulder, pointedly glaring at your staff. They immediately went back to what they were doing but the energy in your store definitely dropped. If you had any free hand, you would be massaging your temples in frustration right now.

Soojin’s tattoo took about an hour and she gleefully told you how much she loved it and loved you. You gave her whatever she needed for aftercare and watched as she crossed the street to Fallin’ Flower. Doyoung said, “Still think they’re not competition?”

“No, I don’t because they’re not curbing revenue from us.”

“Maybe we should open a cafe,” said Jungwoo.

You snorted, “Who would run it? Mark can’t even cook an egg, much less make a tulip out of crema and steamed milk.”

“Hey!” Mark shouted from the back. “You promised not to bring that up again!”

You heard Johnny ask, “Didn’t Gordon Ramsey respond to the tweet Donghyuck posted about that?”

“You all suck.”

It was around four in the evening and you were busy shoving chicken lo mein into your mouth with Jaehyun, Johnny, Taeyong, and Donghyuck in the break room when you thought you heard the entrance bell jingle. You had had a bunch of walk-ins throughout the day; seven people looking to get pierced and five wanting tattoos. And one was a hookup from a few nights ago that Jaehyun didn’t call back, which had you all either laughing at Jaehyun or giving him looks while he ushered her outside, his ears bright red.

Taeil opened the break room door and said, “There’s a woman here asking for you.”

“Me?” you asked, putting your takeout container down on a side table.

Johnny snickered, “Is it a hookup you didn’t call back?” Jaehyun threw a wrapped fortune cookie at Johnny’s head with a “Fuck you” accompanying it.

“I don’t think so,” you chuckled, following Taeil to the front of the shop.

The woman was making small talk with Doyoung and Jungwoo, and she brightened up when she saw you. “Hi,” she said, “I’m Yuna and I was wondering if you had time to tattoo me today.”

“We do,” you said. “It’s nice to meet you, Yuna. Do you know what you’re looking for?”

She nodded and pulled out her phone, showing you a photo of the word ‘first’ in elegant script. “A friend of mine recommended you specifically to do it.”

“I’m flattered,” you said. “Is this your first time getting a tattoo?”

She nodded and you said, “I’ll walk you through the process and then we’ll get started.”

You wrote out the stencil, showing it to Yuna, who clapped her hands and said, “It’s perfect!” She chose to place the tattoo on the back of her arm, right above the bone of her elbow. You had her fill out the paperwork and settle up payment, cleaned the area on the back of her left arm, and reaffirmed that it was exactly where she wanted it placed.

The tattoo didn’t take long given that it was just black lettering, no shading or coloring necessary. As you dressed the tattoo and gave her instructions on how to take care of it, you asked, “Can I ask who recommended me to you for tattooing?”

She replied, “Dokyeom did.”

You raised an eyebrow. “I don’t think I know a Dokyeom.”

“Oh!” She said, “Sorry, you probably know him as Seokmin. Dokyeom was his nickname back in high school.”

Something ugly twisted in your gut. “Got it,” you said. “That was very kind of him.”

Yuna nodded and said, “He’s the sweetest.”

“He is.” For some reason, the words felt bitter on your tongue.

“Thanks so much again,” Yuna chirped, giving you a bright smile. You did your best to return it despite the pit in your stomach. You wanted to ask her more about Seokmin and how they knew each other and what they were to one another but were scared, frankly, scared of the answer.

The day flew by with a couple of more walk-ins asking for various piercings and tattoos. When the clock hit eight, Jungwoo flipped the sign on the door from ‘open’ to ‘close.’ Taeyong stood up and stretched his arms above his head, sighing in satisfaction when he heard cracks and pops. Doyoung commented, “That’s how you know you’re getting old.”

Taeyong shot him a glare. “Sleep with one eye open, Doyoung, I know where you live.”

“Oh, I’m so scared.”

“What’s he doing here?” Yuta hissed and you all followed his gaze to the door, where Seokmin stood outside with a vase of flowers. Out of the corner of your eye, you saw Johnny move to get the door so you hurried over quickly, opening it first.

“You need anything?”

Seokmin shook his head and held out the vase of flowers to you. “No, but I wanted to thank you for taking good care of Yuna today. She was kind of nervous to get her first tattoo and she told me just how amazing you were with her and how you made her feel so comfortable.”

That ugly feeling reared it head again as you accepted the vase. “Just doing my job.” You glanced at the flowers and asked, “What are these?”

“Yellow lilies,” he replied.

You nodded. “Thanks.” The word came out much more curt than you intended it to be and you caught the flash of surprise go across Seokmin’s face before it melted back into his warm smile.

“Just doing my job,” he parroted back at you. You wanted to give him a nicer smile but the question about just who Yuna was to him and who he was to her were still plaguing your mind. The two of you stood there in an awkward silence — a rare occurrence for someone like Seokmin — before he piped up quietly, “I’ll see you Monday, then.”

“Yeah, see you.” You retreated back into your store and watched as he made his way across the street, back to his. It was only then when you noticed his employees peering out the window and into your store, where you absolutely knew all your guys were glaring from.

You didn’t even have the energy to tell them to knock it off. The vase felt heavy in your hands as you placed it on a side table. You remembered the gardenia Seokmin had given you in the morning and you grabbed it from your station, placing it among the yellow lily bouquet.

Jaehyun nudged you and asked, “Are you going to Jungkook’s on tonight?”

“I honestly totally forgot about that,” you said. Jungkook was a friend of yours and Jaehyun’s from college. He took over his father’s company right after you all graduated so you rarely saw him since he was always so busy. Recently, though, he successfully completed a merger with a different company, and he finally was able to justify a break for himself, which included throwing a party in his uptown penthouse.

You weren’t really sure you were in much of a partying mood right now, though.

Jaehyun said, “I think you should go, we haven’t seen him in a while.”

“Yeah, I guess you’re right.”

“I can pick you up at around ten,” Jaehyun said, “and we can go over together.”

“Perfect.”

It turned out that every one of your college friends going to Jungkook’s party remembered it but you. You got a FaceTime call from Jihyo, who asked what you were wearing and then gasped when you said a t-shirt and jeans. “You cannot do that.”

“Why not? What’s wrong with it?” you asked her, taking a few steps away to show her the full outfit as if it would change her mind.

“How often do you get to be all dressed up?”

“Jihyo…”

“Y/n…”

You crumbled under her stern gaze and sighed, “Fine, fine. I’ll look in my closet.” You opened it up, rifling through it until you came upon a periwinkle blue halter top and the matching skirt. You couldn’t remember the last time you wore it, maybe to some club in your senior year?

You showed the set to Jihyo, who squealed and nodded emphatically. “I remember that one! You always looked so sexy in it! Plus, it’ll show off your tattoos and I know lots of guys who’ll love that.”

“I’m not trying to get laid at Jungkook’s.”

“You may not be trying but that doesn’t mean you can’t.”

“I’m hanging up now.”

“Wait, wait! Are you coming alone or are you going in with someone?”

“Jaehyun’s coming with me.”

Jihyo wiggled her eyebrows suggestively and you said, “You and I both know it’s not like that.”

“I’m not sure why it isn’t, though, that man is fine.”

You made a face. “I’ve seen Jaehyun take soy sauce shots and drink milk straight from the carton then put it back.”

Jihyo waved you off. “Semantics.”

“I’m hanging up.”

You met Jaehyun in your lobby about fifteen minutes later and he gave you a once over and a whistle. You punched him in the shoulder and he just chuckled, “I haven’t seen you like this since college.”

“Yeah, I know.”

He glanced at you again and said, “Jungkook should throw parties more often.”

“Jeong Jaehyun, do you want to die?”

He just smirked back at you and the two of you got in a cab to Jungkook’s high-rise. You rang the buzzer for Jungkook’s apartment and you weren’t sure who replied and buzzed you up but you had a feeling it was a very, very drunk BamBam.

“Yo!” Jungkook answered the door, dressed in a tight dress shirt and slacks. “You two look great! Thanks for coming!” He dapped Jaehyun up and gave you a tight hug. Then, he gently poked the tattoo on your shoulder — a small abstract representation of the moon and the ocean that Taeyong did for a you a couple of months back. “This one new?”

“Not really,” you said. “Got it about six months ago.”

Jungkook’s eyes widened. “Shit, has it really been that long since we’ve seen each other.”

“Time flies,” you said. Jungkook nodded and stepped aside, letting you and Jaehyun cross into his apartment. He was lucky that owned the entire floor because if you were his neighbor and the music was this loud, you’d be issuing a noise complaint right now.

Jungkook showed the two of you to the bar, manned by two shirtless bartenders. Jungkook introduced them as Jimin and Jin, who both agreed to work the party as a favor to Jungkook. Jaehyun ordered a screwdriver while you said you’d take some of Jin’s specialty sangria.

“My favorite friends!” You and Jaehyun watched Dongmin stumble toward you, draping his arms around your shoulders in a hug. You and Jaehyun smiled as you steadied Dongmin; he had never been particularly great at holding his liquor, which meant that Dongmin didn’t often get drunk. It would be endearing to see your normally cool and collected friend red-faced and staggering if you weren’t worried that he was just going to tip over at any moment.

You patted Dongmin on the back and asked, “Are you going to be okay standing up on your own?”

“Totally fine,” he said, giving you a drunken grin. He reached up to squish Jaehyun’s cheeks. “I missed this face.”

Jaehyun gave you a look that screamed “Help me!” but you just smirked at him and said, “You’re doing great, Jae.”

You ignored his protests as you slipped away to find some more of your friends. You located Jihyo and Mina, who were doing rum shots with Taeyang and Hyunjae. “You look even sexier in real life,” Jihyo said. She pointed at you and asked the other three, “Doesn’t Y/n look hot?”

“Definitely,” Hyunjae said. Mina and Taeyang nodded in agreement. Distantly, you heard the buzzer go off again and, again, BamBam took up the task of answering it with a garbled yell. You glanced around the penthouse; you thought everyone was here.

“Who else could be coming?” you asked Jihyo.

“I think Jungkook invited some friends from high school.”

You hummed and took the shot Mina poured for you, setting your cup of sangria down and tilting your head back, gulping the shot down just as Jungkook opened his front door. You choked on your drink as you saw Seokmin walk in with two other Fallin’ Flower workers — Mingyu and Minghao — and Yuna.

Oh, you have got to be kidding. Not only were the two people you really didn’t want to think about here together, but you weren’t in the mood for Jaehyun to get into some altercation with Minghao and Mingyu.

“Give me another shot,” you demanded, turning back to your friends. Taeyang and Hyunjae shared a glance but Hyunjae still poured you some more Bacardi. You relished in the burn of the coconut rum, wiping your mouth with the back of your hand. “Excuse me.” You left without another explanation, searching for Jaehyun. You needed to get to him before he saw Seokmin, Mingyu, and Minghao on his own, and you also just wanted to avoid seeing Seokmin and Yuna together.

“Thanks for your help,” Jaehyun deadpanned when you found him near one of the floor to ceiling windows, free of Dongmin.

“Sorry,” you muttered, swiping Jaehyun’s drink from him and taking a sip.

He snatched it back from you and said, “You seem kind of tense right now.”

“Okay, I’m going to tell you something and I need you to not freak the fuck out.”

“Okay…”

“Minghao, Seokmin, and Mingyu are here.”

Jaehyun immediately straightened up and his jaw clenched. His eyes scanned the crowd and it was clear when he found them. You grabbed his shoulder to bring his attention back to you. “This is the first time Jungkook’s been able to relax in a while. Please don’t start some inane argument tonight.”

Jaehyun exhaled through his nose and said, “I won’t.”

You nodded but there was still an uneasy feeling in your stomach. You couldn’t tell if it was from the possibility of some blowup between the guys or if it was because of Seokmin and Yuna, who you spotted in a corner together, their heads bent close to one another.

You took in Seokmin’s profile, all the sharp points of his face that were contrary to his gentle personality. He was handsome, undoubtedly so, and it made your heart hurt just a little.

Whatever he and Yuna were talking about, it was intense and passionate and you wondered if it would end in some equally intense kiss. You didn’t want to watch and find out.

“I’m getting another drink,” you announced to Jaehyun. You made your way to the bar station again when you bumped into someone, who just barely avoided spilling their drink on you. “Fuck, I’m so sorry.”

“You’re all good,” the man said. He smiled at you, the corner of his mouth dimpling. “I don’t think we’ve met. I’m Chan.”

“Y/n.” You shook his hand and asked, “How do you know Jungkook?”

“We studied abroad together,” he explained. “What about you?”

“College too,” you replied. “I’m sorry, I feel like he definitely mentioned you before but I can’t remember.”

Chan shook his head good-naturedly. “It’s okay. He’s clearly got a lot of friends to remember.” He motioned with his drink to the apartment and you laughed a little.

“Clearly.” You pointed at his drink. “What do you have?”

He peered inside and swirled his cup a little, both of you watching as the liquid sloshed around inside. “I think it’s a Long Island iced tea but Jungkook just shoved it in my hand when I arrived. I really haven’t drank any.”

“Can I try?”

“Sure.” He handed you the cup and you took a long pull from it, feeling the delicious rush of alcohol to your head.

You pushed it back into Chan’s hand. “It’s good, try some.”

He took a drink and said, “Wow, that is good.” He handed the cup back to you and you took turns drinking from it, the booze making your head feel light and airy.

The music picked up into a slow, seductive song and you grabbed Chan’s arm, setting the drink down on some random surface. “Do you want to dance?”

“Yeah, let’s do it!” You giggled at his enthusiasm and dragged him closer to the middle of the room, where people had started pairing off to grind against one another. You drew Chan closer to you, guiding his hands to your hips. He pressed your back to his chest, resting his chin on your shoulder as you swayed to the beat together. Some hazy voice at the back of your mind told you to look around to see if Seokmin was dancing with Yuna but it quickly disappeared when Chan nuzzled your neck, his hot breath against your skin making you shiver. Your hands slid to rest atop his on your hips and you pressed yourself closer to him.

You whined when you felt his lips finally make contact with the nape of your neck, sending electricity pulsing through you. You flipped in his arms, draping your arms around his shoulders as he wrapped around your waist. You tipped your head up and kissed him, running your hands through his hair as you still moved to the rhythm of the music.

“This is a little forward,” Chan murmured in your ear, low and slow, “and I don’t usually do this and I’m a little buzzed but do you want to get out of here?”

“Yes, please,” you answered breathlessly and you peeled yourself away from him, grabbing his hand and leading him to the door. You shot Jaehyun and Jihyo separate texts to let them know you were leaving with Chan. Jihyo was the first to reply, requesting that you share your location with her. Your fingers fumbled but you eventually sent your location to her. You didn’t read Jaehyun’s reply, too occupied with peppering kisses along Chan’s neck as he ordered an Uber for the two of you.

You stumbled up the stairs of his walk-up, eventually coming to his front door. He unlocked it as quickly as he could and as soon as it closed behind the two of you, he pressed you against it and kissed you again.

As you two made your way languidly down the hall to his bedroom, Seokmin’s face flashed bright in your mind and you started wondering what it would be like kissing him, grating your hips against his, pressing pecks along his elegant neck.

You fell back against Chan’s bed and he hovered of you, hands hot on the bare skin of your waist. You slipped your hands underneath his shirt, feeling the rows of lean muscle. He kissed along your shoulder, pressing a particularly reverent kiss to your tattoo, before continuing a path along your collarbone. He began trailing closer to the chest when you pushed your hand against his shoulder, gently urging him away from you. Chan immediately backed away and asked, “Everything okay?”

“Yeah, yeah,” you said. You took a deep breath. Seokmin’s smiling face appeared in your mind again and there was a knot in your stomach. You said softly, “I’m sorry, I don’t think I can sleep with you.”

Chan said, “No need to apologize for anything.”

You smiled weakly at him. “You’re much nicer than most of the guys I’ve turned down for sex.”

“Well, being nice about that is, like, the bare minimum of being a decent person.” Chan glanced at the clock at his bedside and said, “I’m not totally comfortable letting you go off into the night on your own so you can sleep here and I can sleep on the couch.”

“I’m not kicking you out of your bed, Chan,” you said.

“I’m seriously okay with sleeping on the couch.”

“Chan, it’s your bed. If anything, I can sleep on the couch.”

“No.”

You said, “We can share your bed.”

Chan raised an eyebrow. “Are you comfortable with that?”

“You just had your tongue in my mouth and we almost had sex,” you said. “I think I can handle sharing a bed.”

Chan barked out a laugh and said, “Got it. Let me get something more comfortable for you.”

Chan climbed out of his bed, staggering a little drunkenly. He righted himself quickly and reached into his drawers, pulling out a t-shirt and basketball shorts for you. He turned around when you changed and clambered into bed next to you when you laid down.

“Can I ask you a question?” he asked.

You hummed in assent and he said, “Do you have any more tattoos? Other than the moon and ocean on your shoulder?”

You nodded, sitting up and reaching over to turn his dim bedside lamp on. “Yeah.” You showed Chan your underarm, where your birthday was written out in Roman numerals. You also lifted your (his) t-shirt and pulled the band of the shorts down slightly to show him your hip, where you had a sprig of lavender.

Chan said, “I’ve always thought about getting one but I keep chickening out.”

“You could drop by my shop some time and we could have a consultation.”

Chan’s eyes widened. “You’re a tattoo artist?”

“Yeah, I even did some of Jungkook’s.”

“That’s wickedly cool.”

You grinned at him. “Thanks.” Your eyelids drooped, either from the alcohol or your own tiredness but it was enough for Chan to reach over you and turn the light off.

“We can talk in the morning if you’re still here,” Chan said. “Let’s go to sleep now, though.”

“Okay. Good night, Chan.”

“Night, Y/n.”

Your head was throbbing and your mouth was as dry as the desert when you woke up. You heard Chan groan behind you and you guessed he was feeling just as shitty as you were. “I’m never drinking again,” Chan grumbled.

“Never say never,” you replied. “But I’m inclined to agree.”

Chan huffed a laugh and said, “Do you have to get to work this morning?”

“No, the shop’s closed on Sundays.”

He said, “Do you want to go to this new cafe? My friends told me they have good hangover baked goods.”

“Sounds perfect.”

You both struggled to get out of bed and Chan let you use his shower first. He also let you keep his t-shirt and shorts, which you wore over your party set, since wearing it by itself at eleven in the morning was not the vibe. You, unfortunately, did have to wear the party heels you stuffed your feet into because there was simply no way you’d fit into Chan’s shoes.

You insisted on paying for the cab to wherever Chan was taking you, finally getting Chan to agree to let you do so as long as he paid for the food and drinks. When you stepped out of the car, you felt fucking stupid that you didn’t realize where he was taking you.

Fallin’ Flower.

You pursed your lips as he held the door open for you. You didn’t go over to Seokmin’s flower shop as much as he came over to Neo Tattoos and Piercings so you weren’t sure what his staff’s reaction would be to you, their persona non grata, strolling in.

Immediately, your mood soured when you spotted Yuna. Logically, you knew you shouldn’t feel this negatively towards her. If she and Seokmin had a thing, if they were boyfriend and girlfriend, that was none of your business, but you couldn’t help the way your heart sank at the thought.

You wondered if you were doing a bad job of hiding that you didn’t like her because, when you walked in, she looked almost appalled and angry. Mingyu was at the counter and you mentally cursed as Chan and you walked up to it. Mingyu looked up with a broad smile but it swiftly slipped off when he spotted you and Chan. “What are you doing here?” he asked brusquely.

Chan frowned, taken aback. “Excuse me?”

Mingyu’s eyes narrowed at you and he spoke past Chan to you, “You have some fucking nerve.”

You almost rolled your eyes. This fucking feud really was the most obnoxious thing you’ve ever experienced. But you had to set an example for the rest of your staff and friends at the shop and, honestly, your hangover didn’t put you in any mood for this bullshit so you tried your best to ignore Mingyu’s attitude. Chan, however, did not. “Don’t talk to her that way.”

Mingyu’s head snapped towards him. “Are you her boyfriend or something?”

“Mingyu! Do you have—” One of the other workers, Jihoon, came out of the florist part of Fallin’ Flower, freezing when he saw you. His expression immediately became colder and he said, “You’re here.”

Chan scowled. “Is this really how you treat customers? Because if it is—”

“Chan,” you said, placing a hand on his shoulder. “I’ll explain later but don’t get worked up over this. I’m fine.”

He looked at you incredulously. “Are you serious?”

“Just stay out of this,” you muttered to him. You turned back to Mingyu and squared your shoulders. Despite Mingyu’s larger frame, you’ve seen how he acted like a golden retriever with Seokmin, so whatever intimidation he was trying to carry out failed miserably. “I’ll take a—”

“You’re still going to order here?”

“I have a right to be here as a paying customer,” you replied tersely. “If you walked into the shop and asked for a piercing or tattoo, we wouldn’t turn you away.”

Mingyu sneered at you and from next to him, Jihoon opened his mouth to say something but they were cut off by two sharp calls of their names. Seokmin rushed out of the flower shop and into the cafe, and you were a little startled by how he looked. His eyes were a little bloodshot and puffy and his shoulders were slumped. Still, he said sternly, “This is not how we treat people here.”

“But—” Mingyu began to protest but Seokmin gave him a warning glare. Seokmin mad was much scarier than you ever envisioned. You couldn’t even fathom what he would look like mad before now.

“Go to the back and cool off. Both of you.” Jihoon and Mingyu left and Seokmin took over the register. “I’m sorry about that, Y/n. What can I get you today?” He gave you a polite smile but it didn’t reach his eyes.

You frowned but gave him your order with Chan giving his own after. Seokmin rang you up and, though you tried to pull out your card first, Chan beat you by tapping his own on the chip reader. “Nice try,” he said, nudging your shoulder. Out of the corner of your eye, it almost looked like Seokmin was queasy. Maybe he was just as hungover as you were.

You shuffled to the pick up area and watched as Joshua and Minghao made your drinks and handed you your food. Minghao’s glare sent an unpleasant shiver down your spine but he didn’t say anything to you.

You didn’t want to stay in Fallin’ Flower any longer than you needed to, so once you got your orders, you suggested that you sit in the small park a few blocks over. As you left, you swore you heard Yuna mutter, “Heartless,” as you passed her but you couldn’t be sure.

You were almost down the street when one of the flower shop workers, Hansol, came running after you. He held out a small bundle of flowers and said breathlessly, “On the house.” He sprinted back into the shop and slammed the door.

You and Chan exchanged equally perplexed looks as you stared at the flowers. You two still continued on your way to the park. You were lucky it was a cloudy day because the sun would have been way too bright for the state you were in. The fresh air helped soothe your raging headache a little and as you settled onto a bench, Chan said, “You said you’d explain what the hell was up with the way they treated you back there.”

You sighed heavily and told Chan all about the rivalry between your stores across the street from one another. He made a face. “That just seems stupid.”

“It is. Seokmin — he was the one who took our orders — and I have tried to get them to cool off but it seems like they just keep inciting one another.”

Chan frowned and said, “They seemed pretty sharp with you even though you’re not the one carrying out this feud business.”

“They’re just hostile to anyone at Neo.”

“I have half a mind to write a bad review about customer service.”

“If you did that, you’d have to write one about my shop too since that’s how my guys act when Fallin’ Flower guys come around.”

Chan gave you a small smile as he sipped his coffee. “Then I won’t.” He looked at the flowers next to you on the bench and said, “Is this part of the feud too?”

“I’m not sure; this is new.”

Chan eyed the flowers and said, “I think those are yellow carnations.”

“You’re a flower expert?”

He blushed a little. “No but my mother’s an avid gardener.”

“Why would they give these to me for free when they obviously don’t like me?” you wondered aloud.

“Maybe they mean something,” Chan suggested. “Flowers all symbolize something.”

You nodded slowly and said, “Maybe. I’ll look this up later, I don’t think I can stomach looking at a screen right now.”

“Same here.”

You and Chan finished your coffee and food and parted ways after exchanging numbers, promising to hang out another time without a) tipsily making out or b) being hungover.

“I still feel like walking death,” you said to Jaehyun as you started to prepare for the work day. Monday came around much sooner than you wanted, especially given that you were still recovering from Jungkook’s party. “How are you so chirpy?”

Jaehyun shrugged with a smirk. “Better alcohol tolerance?”

“Screw you and your genetics.” You massaged your temples and asked Jungwoo, “What’s on schedule for today?”

You zoned out while Jungwoo read what appointments were made for the day. Blessedly, you only had one appointment on tap and it was much later in the evening, which meant you had a fairly relaxing day even if there were walk-ins.

As everyone dispersed to their stations, you remembered something. The yellow carnations. You were about to whip out your phone when you recalled that Johnny was pretty well-versed in flower symbolism given that he specialized in realistic tattoos, specifically flowers and plants. He was the one who tattooed the lavender sprig on your hip, after all.

“Johnny?”

“Yeah?”

“Do you know what yellow carnations symbolize?”

He thought for a second and said, “I can’t remember; I know there was a client who almost got them tattooed but their friend stopped them before she could for some reason. Why?”

You contemplated telling him about the flowers from Hansol but decided against it. It seemed like the flowers couldn’t have any positive connotation to them, which you had already figured, and you didn’t want to fan the flame anymore so you responded, “I’m coming for your brand, Suh.”

He glared playfully at you. “I’ll kill you before you can even try.”

You chuckled and shoved him lightly, earning a laugh from him as well before you both went back to getting ready. You pulled out your phone this time and plugged the flowers into the search bar.

Your stomach dropped when you read the first result.

Yellow carnations: rejection, disdain, and disappointment with someone.

Well, that was certainly a very clear message. And you weren’t super surprised. That doesn’t mean that it didn’t stump you. You understood the disdain part — it was very clear how much Fallin’ Flower employees didn’t like you or the rest of the Neo Tattoos and Piercings crew, but what was up with rejection and disappointment in someone. As far as you knew, you didn’t reject anyone they would care about recently.

What a bunch of weird guys. Still, the flowers were pretty so you put them in a vase with some water and set them up in the window.

Not that you were keeping track or anything, but you’ve spotted Yuna going into Fallin’ Flower a lot more in the past few days. You tried to push down the ache in your chest when you’d see her enter the shop.

You were fortunate that things had been hectic recently. It seemed like there were a lot of birthdays going on, thus a lot of people coming in for celebratory tattoos and piercings. You didn’t have a lot of time to think about Seokmin and the way he looked when you last saw him nor about the rest of the Fallin’ Flower workers and Yuna in those moments, but it was safe to say that in your free time, you were pretty in your head about all that stuff.

You knew the guys saw your change in demeanor and you appreciated the way they tried to cheer you up. Yuta and Mark began calling each other increasingly ridiculous pet names; your favorite one was Yuta’s ‘my sugar plum spice cake.’ Johnny and Taeyong dragged you into random dance parties in your down time. Doyoung and Jaehyun bought you your favorite treats. Jungwoo and Taeil belted the lyrics to your favorite songs. It made you smile and it warmed your heart just how much your friends wanted to make you happy, but you knew your sadness wouldn’t just go away.

Chan dropped by your store one day with a bouquet of chrysanthemums, telling you that he had looked up what the yellow carnation meant and that he hoped these would be a kinder replacement for them since they represented joy and optimism. You ignored the curious looks from Taeil, Doyoung, and Jungwoo as you placed the chrysanthemums in a vase on their desk.

For some reason, you didn’t want to take the carnation down. It almost felt like giving into the defeat by getting rid of them. You wanted the guys at Fallin’ Flower to look at the bouquet and know that they didn’t scare you one bit.

It was the end of the day and you just finished tattooing your last client, Chaeyoung, resting up in the break room with Yuta and Jaehyun, when the bell in your shop sounded very loudly, which meant the door was opened with a lot of force. You heard shouting from Taeil, Jungwoo, and Doyoung, catching only a bit of what they were saying. “You’re not allowed back there!” cried Jungwoo.

“Hey!” Doyoung huffed.

Seokmin burst into the room, looking a little panicked. Yuta and Jaehyun immediately stood up and you followed them quickly, placing your hands on both of their chests before they could do anything further. You leveled Seokmin with a firm look and said, “Only employees are allowed back here, Seokmin.”

“I know, I know, I just need to ask you about something.”

“Okay, let’s do it outside then.”

You brushed past Jaehyun and Yuta and followed Seokmin outside, pulling him around the corner so that you were away from prying eyes. “What is it?” you asked.

“The yellow carnations in your window display. Who gave them to you?”

“Hansol from your shop.”

Seokmin’s frown deepened and he sighed, “I was afraid of that.”

“I know what they mean, Seokmin.”

“You do?”

You nodded, staring down at your shoes. He said, “I swear I didn’t ask them to do that.”

“I know,” you mumbled quietly. “I know you wouldn’t do that.”

A tense silence fell over the two of you. You weren’t sure what else to say to him and then Seokmin, almost inaudibly, said, “Those chrysanthemums are nice.”

“Pardon me?”

A little louder. “The chrysanthemums are nice.”

“Thanks.”

Seokmin crossed his arms and leaned against the outer wall of your shop. “Did your boyfriend give them to you?”

“My what?”

“Your boyfriend,” Seokmin said. “The one you left Jungkook’s party with.”

You stilled. You didn’t even think that Seokmin saw you at Jungkook’s, much less that he saw you leave with Chan. You said slowly, “He’s not my boyfriend.”

“You seemed awfully cozy with him.” Your eyebrows raised at Seokmin’s flippant tone and even he seemed shocked by what came out of his mouth.

Something white hot burned in your chest. Who was he to judge you about anything? “What’s it to you?”

“I didn’t mean to—”

“Save it.” You scowled. “And tell your boys at the shop that they need to do a lot more to scare me off.”

You turned on your heel but Seokmin grabbed your elbow, spinning you around to face him again. “Wait!” he said. “I came here to apologize on behalf of Fallin’ Flower about the yellow carnations.”

“Okay. Is that all?”

“I—”

“Hey!” Johnny rounded the corner. “What the hell are you doing?” Before you could react, Johnny’s pulling Seokmin away from you and shoving him back.

Seokmin stumbled back a little and put his hands up in surrender. “I’m sorry, I wasn’t—”

Johnny pulled himself up to his full height as you saw Mingyu storming across the street.

Oh, great, just what you needed today.

Yuta, Jaehyun, and Donghyuck came around the corner, which seemed to prompt Jeonghan, Soonyoung, and Chan (also known as Dino and not be confused with the Chan you met at Jungkook’s party) to cross the street and join whatever argument Johnny and Mingyu were in.

There were so many voices and so much noise and so much chaos and all you wanted was some fucking peace and quiet to gather your thoughts and calm yourself down. You wanted to run but you knew you were responsible for your staff. Plus, the last thing any of you needed was police being called in for disturbance.

As the voices got louder and louder, you took a deep breath and yelled, “Everyone, shut up!”

All involved parties seemed shocked by your shout. They all turned to you and you dragged a hand over your face, feeling the pent up anger and frustration, not just for the past few days, but from when this ridiculous feud began, start to bubble to the surface. “For once,” you said quietly and steadily, “for once, I just want a day where nobody antagonizes someone else across the street. Clearly, that’s too much to ask from any of you grown men to do. I can’t believe that this fight has been going on for this fucking long over some minor fucking thing that just snowballed into this mess. I’m so sick of listening to everyone bitch and moan about the shop across the street and of being antagonized just for going over to the other side. I’m sure Seokmin is sick of it too.”

You turned towards your employees and said, “We’re closing early today. I’m going to take a long walk and I want you all to stay in the break room and reflect long and hard today. Do I make myself clear?”

Donghyuck weakly protested, “But what about the Fallin’—”

“Seokmin can do whatever he wants with them, I don’t really care.” You tried your best to not think about the way Seokmin flinched at your words. “But as long as you work at Neo Tattoos and Piercings, you’ll do as I say. I’ll ask again: do I make myself clear?”

“Yes, ma’am.”

You didn’t look at any of them as you brushed past and started off down the street on your long, long walk.

You walked down to the pier on the other side of the city. You used to come here a lot when you first started Neo Tattoos and Piercings, but you haven’t had a chance to do it in a while. You leaned against one of the guardrails, staring out at the bay. The breeze felt nice on your skin and you breathed in the salty air of the brackish water.

You felt someone stop a few feet away from you and you didn’t even need to look to know it was Seokmin. You side-eyed him and he said, “I swear I didn’t follow you.”

“I know.”

Silence.

“I’m having my staff members reflect on their actions as well.”

“I’m glad for you.”

Silence.

“I wasn’t judging you about leaving with someone from Jungkook’s party.”

You rubbed a hand across your face. “I— I know you weren’t. I’m sorry, I think I was just— these past few days have been emotionally draining for me so I guess I lashed out and I apologize for that.”

Seokmin shuffled a little closer to you. You didn’t move away. He said, “I’m sorry as well. About the yellow carnations Hansol gave you. I gave him an earful about it; he’s a good kid, but he was egged on by some of the older guys.”

You snorted. “He looked scared shitless when he handed them to me.”

Seokmin laughed a little. “I can only imagine.”

Silence.

Seokmin asked, “Do you know what the other flowers meant?”

“What other flowers?”

“The other ones I’ve given you?”

You wracked your brain. “The, uh…”

“The gardenia and the yellow lilies.”

“Right. No, I don’t know what they mean.”

Seokmin replied, “Yellow lilies symbolize thankfulness.” Thank you flowers for tattooing Yuna.

“Right.”

Silence.

“What does the gardenia mean, then?”

Seokmin was looking anywhere but you. He muttered something but you couldn’t hear it over the churning of the bay water. “Sorry, what did you say?”

Seokmin glanced at you. “Secret love,” he said finally. “It means secret love.”

Secret love.

Your heart stopped.

There was no way Seokmin was confessing feelings for you. You whirled on him, furious. “Are you fucking for real right now?”

Seokmin’s eyes grew giant. “What?”

“You’re seriously confessing a secret love for me while you have a girlfriend?”

“Girlfriend? I don’t have a girlfriend!”

“Yuna!” you practically shouted. “You’re dating Yuna!”

Seokmin blinked at you three times before saying, “I’m not dating Yuna.”

It was your turn to blink at him. “What?”

Seokmin said, “Yuna’s a good friend of mine but she would never date me.”

“How’s that possible? You’re handsome and kind and generous and—” You stopped yourself, feeling your cheeks heat up.

Seokmin grinned at you, relaxing as he shuffled close enough that your shoulders brushed against one another. “She has a girlfriend, Y/n. She’d sooner date you than me.”

You didn’t expect that. “Oh.” You fiddled with the rings around your fingers. “Then why was she giving me such nasty looks the last time I was in Fallin’ Flower?”

“That… that’s my fault.”

Your eyes narrowed and you shifted away from him. Seokmin quickly added, “I didn’t ask her to do it! I… I just…” He sighed, “When we were at Jungkook’s party, I was supposed to confess to you there and ask you on a date and while I was talking through the plan with Yuna, we saw you and that guy... you know…”

You were pretty sure you were very up-close-and-personal with Chan by then. “Yeah…”

Seokmin flushed a little as he continued, “I… I was so hurt by that that I just started crying and Yuna, Mingyu, Minghao, and I actually left pretty soon after that because I was so upset.”

Your heart cracked. “I’m sorry, Seokmin.”

His face was pink as he waved you off. “You didn’t know. I was just being a baby about it.”

“No, I get it. I was… the past few days have been so hard because I thought you and Yuna were dating.”

Seokmin’s head whipped toward you so fast you were scared he got whiplash. “Really?”

“Yeah.”

“Does that mean that you like me too.”

You felt a shy smile creep across your face. “Yes, Seokmin, that means I like you too.” You chanced a look at him.

His grin was as bright as the sun and before you knew it, he was wrapping you in his arms and picking you up, spinning. You yelped and gripped his shoulders tight, whining, “Seokmin, put me down! I’m getting dizzy!”

“Sorry, sorry!” He set you down but didn’t let go of you, arms wound around your waist. “I’m just so happy.”

“Me too.” You paused. “So all those times you brought me flowers for the shop, they had some hidden love confession?”

“Well, not all of them.”

“The red tulips?”

“Yeah, those meant ‘true love.’”

“What about the peonies?”

“‘You’re the most beautiful.’”

“The sunflowers?”

“Adoration and pure love.”

“The—”

Seokmin cut you off, “Can I kiss you?”

“Hell yeah.”

Seokmin pulled you closer and pecked you chastely on the lips. You scoffed playfully at him, “You call that a kiss?”

“Guess I need you to show me how it’s done—”

You dragged him into a passionate kiss and Seokmin’s hands grabbed tightly at your hips. You slid your tongue into his mouth and you swore you heard him whimper when you tugged on his hair. You filed that away for later usage.

You parted with him, delighting in his half-lidded, glazed eyes and his still slightly-parted mouth. “Oh, we’re going to have so much fun together,” you purred, planting a quick kiss to the corner of his mouth.

“Yeah,” he said absent-mindedly. He brought your knuckles to his lips, pressing reverent kisses on each one.

“Can’t wait to break the news to everyone.”

Seokmin groaned, “Don’t remind me. I don’t want to think about them right now.” He buried his face in your neck.

“Don’t worry. Right now, it’s just us.”

You and Seokmin thought it would be better to actually deal with the rivalry between your shops before revealing that you were dating to them. You stopped about a block away from your respective stores — you pulled him in some alley for another quick make-out session — and you went ahead of him to Neo Tattoos and Piercings.

When you opened the break room door, Donghyuck instantly threw himself at you, wrapping his arms around your legs. “We’re sorry!” he wailed.

“Donghyuck, get off her,” Doyoung scolded.

“We really are sorry though, Y/n,” Mark said, trying to pry Donghyuck off of you.

“We thought we were protecting you and each other,” Johnny said with a sigh. “But we know that it wasn’t the right way to go about it.” He helped Mark peel Donghyuck from you.

“Please accept our humble apology cake,” Taeyong said, motioning to the break room table, where a cute, circular, pastel blue and white cake sat with green lettering: We’re sorry for being immature assholes.

You approached the cake, glancing down at it. “How did you guys even get this done on such short notice?”

“We called Sicheng and his friend, Kun, is a baker and he had this cake available and we just asked him to write that,” explained Yuta.

“Do you like it?” Jungwoo asked.

“What flavor is it?”

“Chocolate with vanilla frosting layers,” Taeil said.

You turned to your staff and said, “You know I hate chocolate with vanilla layers, right?”

Donghyuck cried out, “We’re sorry, Y/n!”

Doyoung grumbled, “I knew we should have gotten a different flavor. Taeyong, this is all your fault.”

“My fault? Jaehyun ordered the cake!”

“Wow, way to just throw me under the bus there.”

“Guys, guys!” You said before they could erupt into further hysteria. “I’m kidding, I actually love chocolate cake with vanilla frosting.”

“You’re evil, you know that?” Johnny said.

“Call it payback,” you said with a small shrug. “Now, let’s dig in.”

As you ate the cake on paper plates and with plastic forks and knives, you said to them, “You know you still have to apologize to the Fallin’ Flower staff, right?”

You felt the wave of dissatisfaction but Taeyong replied before anyone could say anything stupid. “We understand and we will. We also hope that they’ll apologize to us.”

You nodded. “I’m sure Seokmin is seeing to that.”

“Speaking of him,” Yuta said, swallowing his piece of cake, “are you going to tell him how you feel?”

You choked on your cake. “You knew?”

Taeil hummed, “It was kind of obvious,” just as Mark yelped, “What?”

“Did you seriously not know?” Jaehyun asked.

“No!”

“Mark, I swear you’re so dense,” Johnny said.

“I am not!”

Your staffs did, begrudgingly, go over to each respective shop and apologize to the other staff. Both you and Seokmin knew the ice wouldn’t thaw overnight so, as a way of trying to quicken the process, you both begged Jungkook to let you use his penthouse to throw a party for your staff under the guise of it being the anniversary of both of your shops. Jungkook, being the good friend that he was, let you on the condition that nothing gets broken.

The party started out a little tense at first, given the long history between your shops and that neither you nor Seokmin told your staffs that the other would be there.

The ice thawed a lot quicker than you expected though. Joshua and Johnny bonded over growing up in America; Hansol, Wonwoo, and Mark traded rap lyrics and favorite musicians; Donghyuck took shots with Soonyoung, Doyoung, Dino, and Taeil; it turned out that Jaehyun and Seungcheol went to the same gym; Jihoon and Taeyong both had a passion for music production; Jeonghan and Yuta had a kindred fondness for pulling pranks on their friends; Jungwoo and Seungkwan became fast friends; and it turned out that you all shared a mutual friend with Jun and Minghao in Sicheng.

As you all sat around at Jungkook’s enormous table, exchanging stories and eating the food you ordered in, Seokmin held your hand under the table. You still hadn’t told your staffs that you were dating yet, even after your conversation with the guys. You wanted to wait until the dust finally settled, which it seemed it had, but before you could say anything, Soonyoung poked Seokmin’s neck. “Dude, is that a hickey?”

Seokmin dropped his fork and his hand flew up to his neck to cover the spot Soonyoung touched. He let go of your hand and grabbed his phone, flipping the camera and tilting his head. Sure enough, there was a small bruise just under his jaw.

Whoops.

Yuta pointed accusingly at you. “That was you, wasn’t it, Y/n?”

“Yeah, that was me.” You leaned your head on Seokmin’s shoulder. “Can you blame me though? I’m just so happy to have my boyfriend with me.”

And like that, the room descended into chaos with people cheering and shouting and whining, “Why didn’t you tell us!”

Seokmin put his phone down and rested his head on top of yours, muttering just loud enough for you to hear, “Who would have thought that we’d ever get here?”

“If you told me we’d all be eating together and that we’d be dating, I would have told you to pinch me.”

“By the way,” Seokmin said, his voice cutting through the din and quelling it, “I have something for you.” He reached into the inside pocket of his jacket and pulled out one long-stemmed red rose. “For you.” He handed it to you.

Well, you didn’t need the internet to know what a rose meant.

#lee seokmin x reader #dokyeom x reader #seokmin x reader #dk x reader #lee seokmin #seokmin #dokyeom #dk #seventeen #seventeen x reader #seventeen imagines #seokmin scenarios #kpop

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secndlife · 4 years ago

Text

pairing: soonyoung x female reader

genre: fluff, smut, very little angst

summary: when you met soonyoung, you thought he was probably one of the most annoying people you had ever encountered. the more you found yourself wrapped up in him, that thought didn’t really change. he was still annoying. annoyingly cute, annoyingly charming, and annoyingly exciting. and, before you realized, you were annoyingly in love.

word count: 33.2k (read on browser or desktop. mobile will kill you)

warnings: blowjob, fingering, face fucking, dirty talk, mutual masturbation, unprotected sex, hair pulling, creampie, mentions of role-playing.

playlist

“There’s someone I want you to go on a date with.”

Doki’s words were barely interesting enough to make you look up from your phone. “I’ll pass,” you said, while scrolling through whatever social media was running on the screen.

They threw a pillow at you, “You will not. He is cute and literally the perfect man for you.”

“There’s no such thing,” you pointed out while finally dropping your device to look at them. “Besides, I have no time.” Work was pretty much your whole life for some time now, so in your free time the last thing you wanted to do was go on dates that were considered failures before they even happened. You were too focused in your career, and you didn’t plan on changing that anytime soon.

“Well, make time because I told Josh to give him your number and that you’re free this Saturday.” It had to be a joke.

You stared at Doki in shock. “Are you serious?” They did nothing but nod. “I’m not free Saturday? We’re supposed to go to Krys’.”

Your friend got comfortable on the couch and started searching for something on the TV. “Krys won’t mind.” They shrugged, nonchalantly.

“Doki, really?” You whined. You much rather spend time with your friends than one a blind date on one of the few days you actually didn’t have to care about work.

“Yes, really.” Finally, selecting something for you to watch, the youngest sighed at your lack of excitement. “He’s cute. I promise. You’ll like him.”

Two days later you got a text from a random number. It wasn’t late, but you were tired from another long day at work and already in bed. The message said something along the lines of “hey, I’m Josh’s friend and he told me to text you”. There was also a smiley face at the end. A couple of seconds later, another one came through, and it had his name. Soonyoung. Pretty.

[9:37pm] you: hi! i’m doki’s friend and i’m so sorry they’re pushing you into this mess :/

You gave him your name and waited for a response.

[9:38pm] Soonyoung: it’s fine! i’m excited! heard some nice things about you :)

For some reason, you felt something at the pit of your stomach, and you had no idea what that was. You decided to throw in a small joke to test the waters.

[9:38pm] you: they mentioned i shower every day right?

[9:38pm] Soonyoung: hahahah! they did not say that but it’s good to know

[9:39pm] Soonyoung: are you really free saturday or was i just played?

You giggled at your phone, fingers quickly moving against the glass.

[9:39pm] you: you’re in luck. i had plans but they got canceled :/

[9:40pm] Soonyoung: good! maybe we can meet at skyline diner at 7? :)

You still had a chance to back down. Tell him that you weren’t really up for it. Not really in the mood. Doki would probably kill you though. Looking back, you should’ve known your heart was set on going already, even if your mind didn’t want to admit that just yet.

[9:40pm] you: it’s a date :)

When you got to the diner on Saturday, the person you met was slightly different from the one in the picture you saw. He had less of a baby face, the raven hair pushed back with just a couple of strains falling on his face giving him a more mature air.

“Hi.” When Soonyoung stood up and smiled, his eyes almost disappeared, and you thought he was very, very charming.

You smiled back, “Hi.” He gestured for you to sit across from him and, when you looked at him under the restaurant light, you saw his face had a light shade of pink over it. He was wearing a button-up shirt that had some type of neon pattern. He looked like what fun would do if it materialized itself. “I thought you were blond,” you pointed out after a couple of seconds.

Soonyoung giggled, “I dyed it like, three days ago.”

“Oh, so when you texted me you were having a beauty day?” You joked. You felt so nervous inside, but, for some reason, something about the man across from you made you that much more comfortable.

“Beauty night, yeah,” he said, head moving in a nod. His smile was too damn adorable.

You hummed, “Right. I didn’t see you blond aside from one picture, but I like it like this.”

Another giggle passed his lips and his cheeks heated up slightly. “Thanks.” You offered him a smile in response and took the menu from the table. “Have you been here before?”

“Not really,” you said, while eyeing the several options in front of you. “Been wanting to, but no time.”

“It’s one of my favorite places. I barely have to look at the menu anymore,” he confessed.

If this were any other date, you’d probably roll your eyes at the situation. But he didn’t sound arrogant or conceited. You didn’t think he even had that in him to be such things. You looked up at him, “Any suggestions?”

Soonyoung thought about it for a second, “You like burgers?” You nodded. “The cheeseburger is insanely good.”

“I’ll have that then.”

He felt a bit of pride and validation in something as simple as you accepting his suggestion and he wondered if that was normal. For him, it probably was.

After the orders were placed, the two of you engaged in conversation naturally. You talked about what you do, Soonyoung’s passion for dancing overflowing in every word, and your excitement in handling marketing communication for a record label being just as visible. You talked about food and music. You talked about your favorite places and funny videos you had seen recently. You talked about travelling and about friends, a story or two about Joshua and Doki coming up.

You had been on dates where you had to put a crazy amount of effort into keeping things moving, into finding something, even if small, to keep the conversation, but this wasn’t the case. Soonyoung was a very reactive person, finding something new to talk about in every response you offered. It was a nice change from your previous failed dating attempts. You also felt like he was really listening. He actually looked at you and not at your lips, despite some small, eventual glances. You felt like he was genuinely interested in what you had to bring to the table, which made things even better.

There was something very exciting about him. He was still somewhat shy, you could tell. But he teased you here and there, and you wondered what else he was hiding behind his perfectly shaped eyes.

When you started talking about movies, you mentioned you wanted to go to the drive-in movie that would be happening throughout September.

“We can go on our third date,” Soonyoung offered.

You squint your eyes at him, “So we’re skipping the second one?”

He shook his head, a teasing smile across his lips. “No. I just already have plans for that.”

“Soonyoung is so annoying,” you told Krys over a glass of wine. You weren’t really expecting a response, so your eyes went back to your phone.

Krys raised an eyebrow at you, “Who’s Soonyoung? Your hot date from yesterday?”

“Yes,” Doki responded while you were too busy sending him another message.

He had been texting you since he dropped you off last night. A part of you missed the buzz you felt whenever you’re getting to know someone. That commotion of waiting for a text or for when you’re just about to see them again. So you just let this feeling wash over you as if it would never end.

“He’s annoying, and you’re texting him?” She sounded confused.

You sighed, “He’s not actually annoying. He’s just, I don’t know. Annoying.”

Doki let out a laugh, looking at your friend while you were still answering the man with the prettiest smile you had ever seen. “You got it, right?”

The second time you saw Soonyoung, he picked you up on a Saturday evening. His hair was down, and you welcomed the sudden change. When you plopped into the passenger seat, you were instantly taken over by a scent that shifted between floral and fresh. You liked it.

“Where are we going?” You asked while putting on your seatbelt.

“You asked me that every single day throughout the week.” Soonyoung let out a laugh. “I’m not telling you.”

You sighed, “I keep asking because you’re annoying, and won’t tell me.”

He shot you a smile, hands quickly shifting the gear and getting the car in movement. “You’ll see when we get there.”

“You’re unbearable.”

“Yet you’re going on a second date with me,” he pointed out, eyes glued to the side of your face while waiting for the traffic lights. “And have already scheduled a third one.”

A huff escaped your lips, “Can you please keep your eyes on the road?”

“The car’s not moving, so technically, I don’t have to.”

You shook your head, “Shut up.” You could feel your cheeks heat up, even when you commanded your body not to react.

A green light invaded the vehicle, and you felt it moving again. Soonyoung finally stopped looking at you, and it was like you could relax again. Irritating. So irritating. But compelling, in the same proportion.

Soonyoung had a hard time finding a place to park, so you ended up having to do some walking. The weather was perfect, your favorite. Not cold enough to need a jacket, but not warm enough to feel like you’re about to pass out. That’s why you liked early September.

Soonyoung had a short-sleeved black button up shirt on. It had red roses printed all over it, and you thought it was a good contrast to how endearing he looked with his hair down.

“Are you gonna tell me where we’re going now?” You said while walking by his side.

The man rolled his eyes, “We’re literally on our way there. Can’t you be patient?”

“No.”

He instinctively took your hand, “C’mon, let’s cross the street.”

When Soonyoung touched you, it was like feeling sparks. Literal electricity all over your body. You were taken aback by it and wondered if he felt it too. When he showed no reaction, you brushed it off, allowing him to drag you across the pavement. Little did you know.

Not long after, your curiosity finally settled. “Bowling?”

Soonyoung nodded, “Yeah. You said you liked it, but haven’t played it in a while. So I thought it would be fun.”

You tried to hold back a smile, but it was useless. So he was really listening. “I also mentioned I suck at it, right?”

He giggled, “So do I. Makes it even more fun.”

An hour later, Soonyoung was almost dripping sweat and had a pout across his lips. “Is this what you call sucking at it?” He was losing and he was losing hard.

“Just didn’t think you were this bad,” you teased. “Wanna make a bet?”

He huffed, “Why would I make a bet at this point?”

You gave him a smile, “Because you’ll win either way.” He did nothing but raise a brow at you, so you continued. “If I win, I get to choose where we go for the fourth date.”

“And if I win?”

“You choose.”

He thought about it for a second while you took another ball in your hand, a purple one this time. “How am I winning if you choose where we go on the fourth date?”

You turned to face him, “Because you’ll get a fourth date with me.”

Soonyoung giggled, “Wasn’t I getting that all along?”

“No,” you answered with a wink, finally taking your turn. Strike. You moved back and sat by his side, “So what do you say?”

He knew you were playing, but decided to push the buttons anyway. “You really weren’t going to go on a fourth date with me?”

You ignored his question, “Yes or no?”

“I won’t answer until you answer.”

“I asked first?” You couldn’t believe him.

He shrugged, “Don’t care.”

“Are you serious?” No response. Astonishing. “Fine.” He looked at you. It was daring, dangerous even. That was your first encounter with the fire behind his eyes, and they were barely a spark then. But you’d meet it better soon enough. “Of course I was going to go on a fourth date with you. Are you happy now?”

Your words made him light up like a beam. “Yes.” He poked your side and stood up. “Bet accepted.”

Unsurprisingly, Soonyoung lost. He didn’t really care, as long as he got to see you again. You said you knew where you were going on date four, but decided not to tell him.

“Really? This is how it’s gonna go?” He asked over pizza and milkshakes.

“Yes.”

He laughed, “I bet you have no idea where we’re going.”

You took a bite of your food and rolled your eyes, “Why would I lie about knowing?”

“To annoy me as much as I annoyed you.”

Touché.

“Fuck you, I totally know it.” The dark haired man laughed again and your chest got warm all of a sudden.

Soonyoung felt more comfortable around you today. He allowed his hand to rest on yours for a second too long. He teased you more. If he thought about it, he’d even describe your presence as soothing. There was something about you that made him feel like he was about to dive into something so breathtaking that not all the air in the world could prepare him for it. He liked it.

It was crazy how time flew when you were by his side. For someone who huffed at every minute, you were actually enjoying yourself. Soonyoung was easygoing and fun and taunting. He kept you on your toes somehow. You liked that. He was good to look at, too. Almost too good to be true.

You finished the food and threw some more conversation away. You went from Soonyoung’s kids class, to why pepperoni pizza is better than hawaiian.

“I can’t believe you like pineapple on pizza. This is actually making me reconsider date three,” you told him while walking back to the car. He took your hand in his as soon as you left the bowling alley. He didn’t seem to think much of it, so you decided neither would you.

He giggled for the nth time that day, “You’re the one with poor taste.”

You bumped his shoulder with yours, “I’m going out with you, so I guess I might indeed have poor taste.”

Soonyoung reached for your waist with his free hand and pinched it. “Hey! Dating me is the biggest proof of actual, perfect taste.”

“Dunno about that.” The two of you had to stop to wait for traffic lights. When you did, you felt Soonyoung’s eyes on you. “What?”

“Look, there.” He pointed to something on your left, somewhere in the now dark and star filled sky.

You turned your head in the direction he was signaling. After a couple of seconds trying to figure out what he meant, you called it a failure. “Where?”

Soonyoung sighed, “How do you not see it? There, dummie.”

You squinted your eyes in the hopes of getting a better vision. Pointless. You turned back to face him, “There’s not—”

Suddenly, you couldn’t speak anymore. You couldn’t speak because Soonyoung’s lips were on yours. When you started paying attention to his actions, it was like he was made of fire, his touch igniting fireworks inside you. You felt, once again, sparks. An explosion of all possible feelings into one. He tasted like something new, but that didn’t actually feel unfamiliar. It was like re-discovering yourself and discovering him for the first time.

Soonyoung used your intertwined hands to pull you closer to him. Once he decided you were close enough, he let go of your hand, only to hold your face. His palm was hot against your skin, and you melted into it. His other hand found its way to the low of your back, holding your body near. It was funny how you didn’t actually feel surprised, hands immediately resting on his chest as soon as he kissed you.

His movements were slow, delicate. He wasn’t hesitating, though. Soonyoung wasn’t a person that hesitated. Not with these things. Not with anything. But this wasn’t exactly how you’d think a first kiss would go for someone like him. You guessed you still had a lot to learn about the man who seemed to make your head spin.

A bit after, he pulled away, but just enough so your lips weren’t touching. “Guess you missed it,” Soonyoung said with a giggle.

You laughed, breath fanning against his face. “Maybe you should try to show me again.”

“How was your third date?” Krys asked while setting up her streaming equipment.

You took a sip of your tea and giggled, “It was nice.”

Your heart started warming up just from remembering it. You and Soonyoung went to the drive-in movie you brought up when you first met. They were doing showings on movies that had do-overs. You wanted to watch ‘13 Going on 30’, but that would only play Saturday and Soonyoung had a private class that day. You ended up settling for ‘17 Again’ on Friday.

The youngest looked at you suspiciously, “Did you just giggle?”

“She does that a lot now,” Doki mentioned while pouring themselves some coffee.

“I don’t?” You huffed. You didn’t giggle. You weren’t a giggly person.

Krys was fixing her mic when she finally looked at you, “Did you fuck?”

Doki scoffed, “She’s literally giggling, what makes you think she fucked?”

You rolled your eyes, “No, we didn’t fuck.”

“You’re barely paying attention to the movie,” Soonyoung said while pressing a kiss by the side of your neck. You had your eyes closed, head resting back on his arm. You were sitting by the backseat of his car, which seemed to be particularly spacious.

“That’s because you’re annoying and won’t let me watch it,” you whispered.

He laughed by your skin, goosebumps forming all over. “I’m hardly,” he placed a peck there, “doing anything,” and another.

“Don’t play saint, Soon,” you warned him, mind perhaps a bit too lost in the sensations.

You felt him shifting by your side. “What did you just call me?” Your eyes weren’t open, but you could hear his smile.

“Nothing,” you denied.

“Did you call me Soon?” The hand that was by your thigh squeezed it a bit harder.

He kissed the corner of your mouth, while you kept your eyes shut. “No.”

Soonyoung laughed, “You’re so cute.”

“So when will you fuck him?” Krys asked, cleaning her keyboard. Her boba tea was somewhere by the floor, and you wondered how long it’d take for her to knock it over.

You sighed, “I don’t know?”

“How sad are you that you didn’t get to fuck? On a scale of one to ten?” Her feet were dangerously close to the drink. Ten minutes tops until it was all over the floor. “It needs to be at least a six, or it’s not worth it.”

Doki ignored the question, even though it wasn’t even directed towards them. “He is so nice to her.”

“I think you meant annoying.”

You tried not to sniffle. You tried really, really hard. Especially because you knew you’d never hear the end of it. But when Zac Efron finished reading the letter at the courthouse scene, it escaped you before you could barely process.

“Are you—”

“No.” You didn’t even let him finish. This would be a nightmare.

Soonyoung slightly sat up to look at you properly, and you hid your face in your hands. “Oh my—”

“Can you shut up?” You said with a whine.

His laugh filled up the car, and you felt your ears burning in embarrassment. “No, don’t cry, c’mere.” He pulled you close to his chest, arms circling your body and legs attached to yours.

You sniffled again and huffed in annoyance right after, “Shut up.”

You felt his lips by the top of your head, “Don’t cry, it’s ok. I’ll give you kisses, do you want kisses?”

“No.” You pulled back to look at him and, when he stared back, he had the cutest smile you had ever seen. The most irritating one, too.

Soonyoung pouted and leaned in, “C’mon, kisses?”

“Well, I think you should fuck,” Krys said. One movement and the tea would mess up the rug. “When are you seeing him again?”

You didn’t actually hear her question. You were too busy rolling your eyes at a text you had just received.

[6:28pm] Soonyoung: did i tell you you’re really cute today?

Date four took longer to come than you’d like. Between random texts and even some late night calls, spending a week without seeing Soonyoung seemed like an eternity. So now, when he was finally in front of you, a stupid grin across his lips, you wished that time stood still.

“How are you this red already?” You mentioned while taking a bite of your mozzarella stick.

As being the winner on date three, you decided to take Soonyoung to a board-game bar. You kept the destination as a secret, little as possible being disclosed before you actually stopped by his place in a cab.

“What time should I pick you up?” He asked, voice hoarse in tiredness. He had just gotten home from a later class, hair still wet from showering. He decided to give you a call with the excuse he needed to know more about your date. Bullshit, he just missed hearing your voice.

“You’re not picking me up,” you stated, simply. “There will be alcohol involved, so you’re not driving.”

A giggle resonated through your ear, “Are you trying to get me drunk?”

You shook your head despite the fact that he couldn’t actually see you, smiling foolishly. “Maybe.” You then remembered something he said on the first date about his tolerance being awfully low. “Just enough to get you to spill your darkest secrets.”

“I’m an open book,” Soonyoung said, chuckling through the line once again. Before you had the chance to respond, he spoke again. “So if I’m not picking you up, you need to give me the address then.”

You weren’t easily fooled. “Not really.”

A huff passed his lips, “So how am I supposed to get there, genius?” There was something about the way Soonyoung never failed to use a teasing tone with you that made you wonder what that meant, if anything at all. You wondered if he was in the same frequency, using taunt as a way to show affection, almost as if it was an actual love language.

“I’ll pick you up in a cab,” you stated, simply.

“You’re really not telling me?” He laughed again. Soonyoung felt like all he did whenever he talked to you was laugh. And the best type of laugh, for the record. Maybe that’s why he wanted to stay in touch all day long, finding stupid reasons to send you a text whenever he could. Maybe that’s why his heart skipped a beat whenever he saw your name across his phone. Maybe that’s why he found you so damn addictive.

You mirrored his reaction, “Nope.”

“Fine,” he said, accepting defeat.

“Fine.”

After a couple of seconds, Soonyoung broke the silence. “I bet you looked really cute today.”

You sighed. You were glad he wasn’t next to you, otherwise he’d be able to see the way you looked when he said that. “Shut up.”

“I told you I have a very low tolerance.” His tone was soft, shy, even. You were discovering that the first stage of drunk Soonyoung meant quiet Soonyoung. His face was flustered and his voice got smaller. It looked like he had a hard time processing things as well, too invested in the way his mind was spinning. Usually, his thoughts moved at a faster pace. Even faster than the world around him. Now, it seemed like the tables have turned, and he could barely keep up.

The two of you had been there for some time now. Not too long, but enough to share two bottles of soju and play a couple of games. You won most of them. The conversation flowed absurdly easy, which was something you enjoyed very much about being with him.

You chuckled, “It’s fine. We can stop drinking.”

He shook his head vehemently, “No, I can still take a couple more.” He bit on one of the cheesy fries that rested by the side of the table.

“If you die on me, we’re not going on date five.”

He felt like his body was on fire. Funny, Soonyoung felt like that the last time he saw you, too. And he wasn’t even drunk. “I won’t.” He couldn’t risk it, even though he was pretty sure you were just teasing.

Soonyoung looked nice today, black hair pushed back once again. He had a tiger printed, long sleeved shirt and a back jacket on top. You remembered him mentioning he had somewhat an obsession with tigers. You found it almost cute, but didn’t really voice it out, opting on provoking him instead. The black, tight cut jeans made him look appetizing, especially with all the glimpses it gave you from his well toned thighs.

The shirt was slightly tucked in by his front, a small leather belt adding up to his appearance. He also had a couple of metal chains hanging by his neck, but nothing too extravagant. They were thin, classic. You also took some time to notice how his earrings dangled whenever he moved back and forth while laughing. You had to admit, he looked good. Really good. And he looked exactly like himself. He looked fun, drawing just the right amount of attention, and like he could actually eat you whole.

“Good, then.”

Technically, Soonyoung didn’t lie. He didn’t actually die on you, but he was for sure slightly past his limit. You found out that the next stage of drunk Soonyoung was, much like his regular self, loud. But that wasn’t the most prominent feature. He was clingy. Real clingy. He moved to sit by your side of the booth, and it was like he was physically attached to you. While you tried to put the pieces from Monopoly on their place, he held your face and kissed your cheek multiple times.

“I’m trying to clean up, Soon.” You had given up on calling him for his full name already. It was long and Soon sounded oh so much better. Not particularly right, though. But still better. Easier.

He giggled by your skin, “Ok.” His lips by your cheek, “I’m not,” again, “really,” and again, ”doing anything,” and again, “to stop you.”

You sighed, amused at how needy he seemed to get under the influence of a couple of shots. How many, even? Adding up, he hadn’t even had two full bottles, while you had almost double and felt fine. Cute.

It took longer than expected to actually finish putting the game away, but you managed eventually, despite the fact that Soonyoung made it that much harder. “I think we should go,” you said, trying to detach him from you and hold back a laugh. It was no use.

Soonyoung sighed and a pout formed on his lips, “Really?”

You nodded, “You’re way past your level, and you have a private class to teach tomorrow morning. I should get you to bed.”

“Your bed?” He suggested. From the look on his face, you figured there was no intention behind that. At least, not for tonight.

Thinking about it for a while, you could just get a cab, drop him off and go home. But you would probably just get worried unless you tucked him in. “My bed.”

When you got home, you tried your best not to make too much noise. Soonyoung had managed to secure himself against your back, arms around your middle and lips never leaving your neck. You felt him giggle several times on the way between the building’s entrance and your room.

“I’ll be right back,” you told the man once you finally managed to sit him by the edge of your bed.

“I’ll miss you,” he whined. “Don’t go.”

You shook your head, heart growing at his words. “Stop being silly.”

Doki’s door was closed, which meant they were either sleeping or not home at all. You hoped they weren’t home, because you were pretty sure Soonyoung would probably wake them up at some point. The man had no control.

You were by the fridge getting some water when you heard footsteps coming your way. Soonyoung was unbelievable. You placed the cup at the counter and turned around, resting your back against the wooden surface and crossing your arms.

When he reached the room, Soonyoung looked at you as if he knew he was doing something he wasn’t supposed to. You swore you had never seen anything more endearing. “Hi,” he said, perhaps louder than he thought.

“I told you to stay there,” you whispered in fake annoyance.

“No, you didn’t. You just said you’d be back.” Once he was acknowledged, he walked towards you, stopping close enough to be considered an invasion of your personal space. That seemed to be a concept Soonyoung had never heard about. “Besides, I missed you,” he said, caging you between his body and the counter.

“Soon, let’s go to bed.” You tried to motion for him to move, but he didn’t budge. Instead, he started kissing your neck once again. You laughed faintly.

“Did I tell you how sexy you are?” He murmured against a particularly sensitive spot. You did your best to hold back a moan, but you were pretty sure he heard it.

He had to be kidding. “Baby, you’re drunk. C’mon.”

Soonyoung applied a bit more pressure, teeth nibbling at your skin. The universe was really testing you today. “Just because I’m drunk I can’t tell you how fucking hot you are?”

You gently took his face in your hands, using all of your self-control to not surrender to his ministrations. His hair was slightly down now, a couple of strands falling on his eyes. You brushed it off his face and he smiled. “We’re not doing this now.” Your eyes were sweet. You weren’t shutting him down completely, you just thought this wasn’t the way to go today, as much as you’d like for him to fuck you up.

Even with all the alcohol running through his system, Soonyoung knew you were right. He wanted to do this properly. He wanted to do you properly. He was way too invested to waste the first time he gets to fuck you on being drunk and horny. He wanted to do it for hours, to make you moan his name like a goddamn mantra. Soonyoung just had to be patient. It just sucked that patience wasn’t exactly his forte.

He nodded softly, and you placed a gentle peck by his lips. “Let me just get some more water, and then we can go to bed.” Soonyoung stepped back, watching you move quietly across the floor. You offered him a glass, “Drink it.” He was in no position to refuse, the liquid almost calming down all the boiling in his blood. “More?” You asked once he was done.

The man shook his head, offering you a smile, and putting the glass inside the sink. “No.”

“Hmkay,” you said, taking a small bottle in one hand and Soonyoung in the other.

When you were back in your room, you took your sleeping shirt and told him you were going to the toilet. He wondered why you didn’t get changed in front of him, but he guessed it was just not to fuel him up more. He mentally thanked you for it.

Soonyoung removed his shirt and placed it by the end of the bed. He had no strength to properly fold it. Yeah, he was in no condition to have sex tonight. He thought of removing his jeans too, but he was scared you’d get uncomfortable. Something told him you wouldn’t, but he was too scared these were just drunk projections.

He pulled out his phone and quickly texted Seungkwan to let him know he wasn’t going home. He couldn’t type properly, so he just hoped what he did manage to type was understandable enough. After he set up his alarm, he put the device on the small furniture placed by the side of your bed and let his eyes scan your room while he waited. The walls were all painted in traditional white, but he found it fitting. Your bed was big, you mentioned once that you valued a good night sleep, despite not getting one that often. There were two nightstands, one on each side. You also had a workspace set up, a relatively big desk and what seemed to be a comfortable chair. Before he could shift his attention to the art piece above your laptop, you opened the door.

“Hi,” you said, shooting him a smile. Once you noticed he was still in his pants, you furrowed your brows. “You’ll sleep in jeans?”

Soonyoung chewed the insides of his cheek, “Hm. Yeah. I wasn’t sure if—”

You giggled at how his face seemed to be even more red now, as if that was even possible. “Stop it. That’s really uncomfortable.” You took his shirt in his hand, folding it carefully. “Just sleep in your boxers, it’s fine.”

You tried not to stare. You really did. But Soonyoung’s body made your throat dry. He appeared to be a man made of contrasts. Especially now, while his face offered shyness and his body delivered pure sin. He noticed your gaze and instinctively tried to cover himself.

“If I tell you you’re hot, will you try to fuck me again tonight?” You asked while folding his jeans.

Soonyoung let out an embarrassed laugh, “No.”

Once his clothes were all set by your chair, you moved towards him, placing yourself between his legs. You rested your hands by his shoulders and he looked up at you. “You’re really hot.” You leaned in, placing a small kiss by the corner of his lips, which were curving up slightly. His hands moved to the back of your thighs, massaging the skin gently. You then gave him a proper kiss. This time, he tasted like soju and craving. Too bad you wouldn’t be able to fully have it tonight. He kept his eyes shut and, when you pulled away, he whined. You caressed his hair gently, “Bed time.”

You stepped towards the switch and waited until Soonyoung was comfortable against your sheets. “No, not that side. That side’s mine.” He giggled and moved further on the bed.

Turning off the lights, you hummed in content as your head hit the pillow. The moonlight managed to find its way into your room through the not fully closed curtains. It allowed you to see Soonyoung’s body shifting, and his arm suddenly moving towards you, but almost immediately pulling back.

“What are you doing?” You giggled.

“Nothing,” he said, voice low. God, he wished he wasn’t drunk now. Why couldn’t he hold his liquor like the theoretically grown man he was? He felt like he was ruining everything with how fucking needy he was. And it wasn’t just the alcohol. It was you, too. Soonyoung’s heart was running, and it was running towards you. And he had no intentions of stopping it.

You touched his naked arm lightly and, despite being under the covers, he felt a shiver popping up his skin. You felt him tensing up, and you couldn’t help but smile. “Were you trying to cuddle me?”

Soonyoung sighed, “Yes. I’m sor—”

You leaned in and kissed his shoulder. “You can. I’d like that.”

And then he was all over you. You raised your head, so he could position his arm underneath. His legs tangled with yours, and he let out a breath in content. Once you were settled, you realized his chest felt like home.

Soonyoung tapped your back, and you looked up at him. The way he smiled at you made the butterflies in your stomach dance all around. “Good night.”

You smiled too, even wider when he pressed a kiss at your forehead. “Night, Soon.”

You woke up to the sound of a phone buzzing. You tried to remember at what point you fell asleep, and when you realized you were still attached to Soonyoung, you furrowed your eyebrows. You hated falling asleep cuddling.

You loved to cuddle, but just until those two final blinks before you’re actually sleeping. That was the sweet spot, the moment you go to your side of the bed and the person beside you goes to theirs. Apparently, that didn’t really happen. Fuck.

Even worse, you realized you fell asleep laying on your left. That wasn’t your side. You couldn’t sleep like that. But, for you to face him, you had to. The realization made you tremble. Horrible.

Soonyoung shifted beside you, mind confused and not really understanding what was making the noise that had the audacity to wake him up. Especially when his head was almost pounding.

“It’s your alarm,” you said, voice cracking. You cleared your throat in an attempt to adjust your vocal cords. “You have a class.”

The man let out an annoyed sigh, “Can you hand me my phone, please?”

You barely opened your eyes, arms moving with ease towards the nightstand, but without moving too far away from Soonyoung. You handed him the minty device, and adjusted yourself close to him again. “What time is it’?”

“Almost eight.” Turning off the alarm, he checked a text from his student asking him to move the class to an hour later due to some family matters. Soonyoung thanked the gods for that. This meant he would be able to at least spend some time in bed with you before he had to go home and get ready. He locked his phone and placed it by the furniture next to him.

“At what time is your class?” He felt so fucking good you wanted to stay there forever.

His fingers danced by your shoulder, and you hummed in appreciation. “It was at nine, but Changmin texted me moving it to ten.”

“Good,” you said, pressing yourself closer to him. “Let’s sleep a bit more, then.”

Soonyoung didn’t protest. The two of you didn’t actually sleep, rather settling for a small nap. He couldn’t be late, anyways. You didn’t want to risk it.

What woke you up the second time was Soonyoung’s incessant moving. He shifted once, twice, three times. “What’s wrong with you?” You grunted.

“Nothing.” His body moved again, this time it was the arm that you had as a pillow. You sighed and lifted your head while Soonyoung pulled the covers closer to him.

You blinked a couple of times, eyes finally opening up and adjusting to the light. You tried to move closer to him again, but the closer you got, the more he tossed around. “Ok, what’s going on?”

Soonyoung was clearly uncomfortable. He shifted once more and let out a long groan. He repeated himself, “Nothing’s going on.”

You furrowed your eyebrows at him, “Then stop this and let me cuddle you?”

“It’s just—”

“Oh.” You saw it now. You definitely saw it. “Oh.”

He felt his cheeks burning up. As if last night hadn’t been messy enough, he did himself the favor of getting morning wood. You probably thought he was a freak. He covered his face with his hands, voice muffled, “I’m so sorry. I don’t want you to think that I’m horny all the time. Not that I’m not. I kinda am. It’s just. Urgh.“ Great. He was doing fucking great. He had to stop talking, or he was going to ruin it. “I’m sorry.”

You giggled. He was so damn cute. You drifted closer, hands moving over his and making him look at you. “I can help,” you offered.

Soonyoung’s eyes went wide, “What?” He was doing his best not to rush into things, especially considering how he acted the night before. But the way you had just offered to get him off with doe eyes made it way too difficult.

You leaned in, pressing your lips against his neck. “Let me handle it.” You bit down on his skin and he let out a moan.

“You really don’t have to,” he said, sounding as if the air was being sucked out of his lungs.

You laughed and goosebumps formed across his chest and arms. “I want to.” Your hand moved to his cock, and he whined.

“Fuck.”

“You’ll have to be quiet, though,” you warned. “I’m not sure if we’re alone or not.”

Soonyoung nodded, chuckling lightly, “I’ll do my best.”

“Good boy,” you said, straddling his lap. You leaned in, attaching his lips to yours. It felt desperate, as if the two of you waited for this for far too long. Soonyoung’s hands moved to your ass, squeezing it and earning himself a moan.

You started grinding against him and he cursed. “I’ll probably cum embarrassingly fast.”

“I’ll take it as a compliment,” you said, with a laugh. You moved to his jaw, then to his neck, placing featherweight pecks and licking and nibbling at the skin. “We don’t have much time, anyway.”

Soonyoung was really trying to keep quiet, but this was all a bit too much. He wasn’t sure for how long he’d be able to hold it in. It didn’t really matter, anyway. He was sure he wasn’t going to last long, which was surprisingly unusual. It was all your fault, you were driving him fucking crazy.

You made sure no part of him was left untouched. You placed kisses all over his chest, his navel, and his hipbone. Soonyoung was getting slightly impatient. “Baby, please.”

You giggled, hand rubbing him over the black boxers. “Calm down.”

“I’m dying here,” he said between chuckles.

Your fingers hooked on the waistband of his underwear and he lifted his hips in response. Once the piece of clothing was thrown somewhere on the bed, you dragged your nails against his thigh and he hissed.

“You’re such a fucking tease.” You looked up and smiled. Yeah, you’d be the death of him alright.

When you finally took his cock in your hands, Soonyoung let out a small moan. “God, please.”

You spit against your palm, fingers wrapping slightly tighter against his hard cock, pumping him slowly. He threw his head back and closed his eyes, wanting to focus solely on how good everything felt.

That wasn’t your plan, though. “Look at me,” you told him while leaning down, placing yourself comfortably between his legs.

Once you made sure he had his gaze on you, you stared back and gave his tip a small lick. “Are you serious?” He sounded desperate. Good.

You held him by the base and decided it was enough teasing for today. You just really wanted to taste him. Once you actually wrapped your lips around his head, he lost it. “Shit, shit.” He had never seen anything prettier than the way you looked with his cock in your mouth. No one has never, ever, looked that good.

Soonyoung wasn’t that big, perhaps slightly above average. That was good enough for you. Perfect, even. Especially as you were pretty sure his stroke game would be heavenly. He was a dancer, after all. But this was a thought for another day. Now, you wanted to focus on how good he felt inside your mouth. On the salty taste of his precum against your tongue. On the way his hand moved to wrap around your hair, pulling it just the right amount.

You started bobbing your head, taking as much of him as you could. When the tip hit the back of your throat, Soonyoung’s hips buckled involuntarily, and you slightly choked, eyes watering. You didn’t pull back, though. “Fuck, sorry.” You squeezed his tight to reassure him. “It just feels so good. Your mouth feels so good, baby.” You felt your chest swell up in pride.

You kept your movements for some time, Soonyoung dropping constant praises your way. When you swallowed him almost in full again, he whined louder than he should. You eyed him, mouth full, and he looked at you apologetically. “It’s just. Fuck.” He couldn’t think straight.

You pulled back for a moment to catch your breath, hands still pumping him steadily. His grip on your hair didn’t allow you to move much further. “You’re so damn loud.”

Soonyoung let out an airy laugh, “Your fault.” Everything seemed to be your fault lately. From the way his heart was usually racing half of the day, to how much he giggled.

Shooting him a wink, you went back into action, lips now focusing on his head while your fingers worked on his length. Soonyoung had much better stamina than that, but he felt his high approaching fast, thigh tensing up slightly. “I think I’m gonna cum soon.” He didn’t want to cross any limits, though. “Can I—”

Before he could finish, you pulled back just to respond. “Yeah, I wanna swallow it.” He wondered how he didn’t bust right then and there.

He closed his eyes for a brief second, as if that would do something to ground him. “You’re so fucking hot. Shit.”

Soonyoung didn’t last long after that. All it took was his tip hitting the back of your throat maybe two, three times, until you felt him releasing inside your mouth. You swallowed everything, like you said you would. You worked him through his high while he shamelessly moaned your name. If Doki heard that, you’d probably never hear the end of it. It was worth it, though. The way he sounded was like music to your ears.

He pulled you away from his cock by your hair before you could actually overstimulate him. Pity. “Fuck,” Soonyoung said, head finally resting back against the pillow.

You giggled and crawled up to his side. Wiping your lips with the back of your hand, you didn’t miss the chance to tease. “Well, that was fast.”

He laughed, “I promise I can last longer than that. I can go on for hours, really. I was just caught—”

“It’s fine,” you said, chuckling while trying to calm down your breathing

Once he felt like he could move again, he put on his boxers and moved to lay on top of you, hands resting by the sides of your head. “I’m serious. Literal hours.” Your chest moved up and down in a laugh while he leaned in to place kisses by your neck. “When I’m finally fucking you, which, by the way, will be after our next date, I’ll prove it.”

Your hands moved to the back of his head, pressing him further into you. “Okay,” you muttered.

“Make sure to put on your calendar,” he nibbled at the skin, and you groaned, “getting dicked down by Soonyoung next Saturday.”

You giggled while he pulled back to look at you. “You’re absolutely ridiculous.”

“Thanks.” You were almost addicted to the way he smiled at you by now.

He leaned in again, but this time, to press his lips against yours. You kissed for some time, hands roaming with no specific direction. You would never get enough of him, it seemed. And you didn’t actually mind that. Especially as you had a feeling he wasn’t going anywhere anytime soon.

“I have to get out of bed, or I’ll get hard again,” he said while placing pecks by your jaw. “Hard and late.”

You sighed, “Okay.” Yeah, it would be almost impossible to stop if you kept going. Soonyoung didn’t move, though. He kissed your cheek. Your nose. Your temples. When his eyes locked on yours, something inside you turned. “You have to move,” you pointed out.

Soonyoung rolled his eyes, “Fine.” He moved away from you, sitting up by the edge of the bed and stretching his back. You admired the way his muscles moved.

He stayed like that for a bit, and you reached out to touch his waist, “You’re very, very hot.”

His cheeks got warm at the sudden compliment. He also felt his dick twitch inside his pants. What were you doing to him? “So are you.”

You didn’t respond, the two of you falling into a comfortable silence while Soonyoung got dressed. You were sprawled in your bed, not intending to get up anytime soon. You liked to enjoy your mornings there when you didn’t have to work, so you were going to do just that. Just not with the company you wanted. Your sleeping shirt was by your waist now, legs exposed into the dim morning sun.

While Soonyoung pulled his jeans up, he sighed at you in frustration. “Can you stop?”

You got confused. “I’m not doing anything?”

“You just look so damn sexy like that,” he confessed. “It’s unbelievable that I can’t actually fuck you senseless right now.” You shook your head and laughed. “It’s not funny!”

You stared at him for a moment while he looked genuinely annoyed. You grabbed the covers, bringing it over your head, and turned to the opposite side. “Better?” You said from your fortress.

Soonyoung huffed loud enough for you to hear, “No!” You felt the mattress moving below you, the blanket suddenly not covering you anymore and hands being placed on your waist. Soonyoung adjusted himself close to you, face pressed by the crook of your neck. “Because now you look so cute that I want to stay like this forever.”

He felt your back moving as you giggled. “You’re insane, Soonyoung.”

Eventually, he actually had to leave. Time was running, and he still had to go home before his class. You offered him breakfast or water or coffee, but he said he’d grab something on the way home. You kissed him goodbye and watched as the elevator door closed on him while he blew you another kiss. He had barely left, and you already had a tug on your chest from missing him. You were going crazy.

Once you went back inside, more specifically to the kitchen, you found Doki sitting by one of the stools with an amused smile across her lips. “Was that—”

“No.”

“Did you—”

“No!”

“I’m telling Krys.”

When Soonyoung came home that morning, he found Jihoon by the living room with a plate of food in hand.

“Morning,” he said, voice evidently overly excited for someone who had just gotten home at 9am.

Jihoon sent him a nod. Once he realized Soonyoung hadn’t actually spent the night there, he questioned the man further. “Wait, where were you?” He offered his friend a cheeky gin. “Her house?”

“Yes.” His voice was filled with pride. “And I got myself a morning suck.”

Jihoon frowned, “You’re disgusting.”

Soonyoung took a bottle of water from the kitchen and went back to sit with his friend for a moment. “Hoon?”

The man sighed, “What?”

He thought of how he felt when he woke up in the middle of the night and had you in his arms. Soonyoung had dated a fair share of women before. But the way his heart grew bigger when you hugged him tighter was something completely new.

“I really like her.”

“Another round?” Soonyoung asked while kissing your neck.

You could barely breathe. He really wasn’t joking when he said he could go on for hours. “Are you serious?” He pressed himself on you, naked chest flushed against your breasts. “I just came for the fourth time. How are you still hard?”

He chuckled against your skin, “I told you. Hours.”

“Give me five minutes,” you begged. He hummed while biting on the spot right below your ear that made you moan.

Your legs were parted, but you barely had the energy to wrap it around his waist. It had been what, an hour and a half? You would be more than happy to call it a night, but Soonyoung clearly had other plans.

“Are you sure no one’s home?” You asked while he pressed you against the entrance door.

His fingers reached for the keys, turning it to ensure you’d have the much-needed privacy. “I made them go away, so we could have the place to ourselves.”

Soonyoung’s hands went straight to the sides of your neck, pulling you in for a kiss and humming in relief when he felt your tongue against his. You grabbed the belt loops on his dress pants and held him close to you.

“I can’t believe I finally get to fuck you,” he whispered by your lips when you pulled away slightly in an attempt to catch your breath. “And for as long as I want.”

He didn’t really know where to start. Soonyoung wanted to touch every single inch of your body. Your breasts, your ass, your waist, your hips. He wanted to make sure you knew how much he wanted you. He felt desperate, almost a bit too lost in his wish to please you.

You seemed to match his thoughts though, because before he realized, your hands were rubbing his cock. “I can’t wait to feel you inside me.”

Your fingertips danced against his naked back while he continued his ministrations at the crook of your neck. “I’m gonna have to train you to keep up with me,” Soonyoung said with a laugh. This was a bad combo: you came too easily, and he had massive stamina. You knew he was going to make you pass out one day.

You sighed, “Really, Soonyoung. You’re a freak.”

He lifted himself up, palms resting by the sides of your head. The smirk he had on his face made you wet. “Don’t worry, I’ve been told I’m a great teacher.”

When you came back home on Sunday, fairly early due to having a brunch scheduled, Krys and Doki were already sitting by the kitchen. You pushed the door open and the smell of french toast filled up your senses.

“Morning,” you said, dropping your purse by the shelf in the entryway.

Both of them looked at you with entertained smiles. “Where were you?” Doki asked while flipping the food in the pan.

You rolled your eyes, “You know where I was.” They laughed at your response.

You sat down by Krys’ side, and she offered you a mimosa. “Does this mean you finally fucked?”

You rolled your eyes, taking a sip of your drink. “Yes.”

She let out a yelp, grabbing your arm in excitement, “Oh my God! Was it good?”

“Can you shut up?” You said, covering your face with your hands.

Doki eyed you, “She’s asking a valid question, though.”

The way Soonyoung slammed his hips against your ass was probably one of the best things you had ever felt. You were lying on your stomach, a pillow helping with raising your bottom slightly. One of his hands was by the low of your back to keep him steady.

“Fuck, baby. That’s the best pussy I’ve ever had,” Soonyoung groaned while pulling out, only to push back in even deeper.

You were almost dizzy at this point. You came for the second time not long ago, him managing to coax you into going at it again. He seemed to never get tired.

You moaned, perhaps a bit too loud, when you felt him hitting a good spot. “God, Soonyoung. Feels so good.”

He leaned in, lips moving against your cheek, “You can barely keep it in from how tight you are.”

You rubbed your temples in distress, trying to hide the goosebumps that formed along your arms just from thinking about the previous night. Both of your friends kept staring at you, waiting for a response.

“Yeah.”

After Krys managed to steal a couple more details about your sex life, much to Doki’s dismay, the three of you ate comfortably. You loved their omelet, and you wished they’d make it every day.

“So when will I meet him?” Krys asked while taking a bite of her food.

You scoffed, “Hopefully not anytime soon.” You knew both of them enough to know that it would be a nightmare. Especially if alcohol was involved.

Doki laughed, “I have to admit, it would be chaotic.”

“That’s not fair,” Krys whined. “I want to know the guy she’s in love with.”

“I’m not in love with him!” You weren’t. You really weren’t. “We went on five dates only.”

The rainbow haired woman did nothing but shoot you a glance, “Whatever you say, love.”

A part of you was excited to have Soonyoung around your friends. A different part was somewhat scared. You weren’t the one to introduce dates in gatherings unless you felt it could actually become something. You wondered what bringing him as your plus one to Krys’ birthday party meant. He was friends with Joshua, of course, that being the whole reason why the two of you met. But that was usually how he was introduced whenever he came around their place, which didn’t happen often. Whenever they met, it was usually at Jeonghan and Seokmin’s apartment.

Now, things were different. Now, Joshua wasn’t the one to invite him. You were. You invited him to go to a friend’s birthday party with you. It seemed deeper. More meaningful. It was nothing big, though. Just a couple of yours and Krys’ closest friends. But still, it seemed like a considerable step. Especially as you were someone who valued their opinions, so you just wanted everything to go well.

Soonyoung decided he wasn’t going to drink as he had a very important meeting over one of his choreography projects the next morning, so he offered to pick you up. Doki went over earlier to help set up everything, so it was just the two of you arriving together.

You fixed his hair while waiting for Krys to open the door, and he leaned in to kiss your cheek in appreciation.

“Hi!” Your friend said, while welcoming you in. She was wearing her favorite dress, a tiara complimenting her features and living up to the title of the most important person in the evening.

Her actual birthday was a couple of days ago, but she decided to celebrate it later on due to her busy streaming schedules. The two of you hugged, and you introduced her to the man by your side. “Soonyoung, this is Krys. Krys, this is Soonyoung.”

He smiled at her, “Happy birthday.”

“Thank you!” Soonyoung took your hand in his and Krys raised her eyebrow at you, her attention going back to him right after. “So you’re the famous Soonyoung, huh? Heard a lot about you.”

His cheeks heated up in embarrassment, “Good things, I hope.”

Krys thought of teasing you, but she figured you’d be quite nervous already. Perhaps after you had some alcohol through your system she’d give it a go. “Very good things.” Soonyoung smiled again, eyes squinting as his cheeks moved up. He squeezed your hand a bit tighter. “Both of you know your way around, make yourselves at home.”

You decided on a Malibu Coke, and handed Soonyoung a glass of soda. “Tonight’s your turn to take care of me,” you told him while taking a sip of your drink.

He leaned in, hand by your waist, and placed a peck by the corner of your lips. “Gladly.”

Soonyoung was shy at first, standing faithfully by your side while you mingled around. He got more comfortable later on when he spotted some more familiar faces, those being Seokmin and Jeonghan.

You left him alone with the two of them while you went searching for your friends. You found them by the fridge, Doki fixing Krys another drink. You were past tipsy at that point, losing count of how many cocktails you had taken.

“He really doesn’t look like he can fuck for hours,” Krys said, back resting against the kitchen counter.

You giggled, “Shut up.” Yeah, you were definitely drunk.

Doki finished the cocktail, handing it to the youngest. She took the glass in her hands, chugging down almost half of it. “I can give you some tips on how to last longer if you want. You’re kinda like an old hag.”

“He’s doing that already,” Doki chirped in. “The other day, they were in her room for literally two and a half hours. That’s a lot of time for her.”

You felt your ears burning up, much like the rest of your body. “Can you stop?”

“He’s doing a good job, then.” Krys said while elbowing you. You shook your head, staring at your friends in disbelief. “For real, though. He seems nice. And he’s sexy. Good for you.”

Soonyoung was nice. And yes, very, very sexy. But there was so much more to him that made you want to be by his side that you wondered where your feelings stood at that point.

The party flew by, you consuming more Malibu Coke than you should. At some point, most of the people had left already. You were sitting by the couch while Soonyoung fed you and Doki and Joshua cleaned up.

“You look like a baby,” Krys said while plopping down next to you.

You shot her a face and opened your mouth towards Soonyoung, who gave you the last bite of one of the sliders Joshua had made. “She’s my baby,” he said, while you chewed.

You giggled at him. If you were sober, you’d probably throw some comment on how annoying he was. Now, all you could think was how much you genuinely liked him.

“Gross.” Your friend sighed, “Why does everyone have someone nice but me? Even Joshua.”

“That’s because it’s not your time yet,” Soonyoung said while wiping the corner of your mouth with a napkin. “You just have to be patient, like I was.” When he smiled at you, you felt butterflies in your stomach.

“Okay, this is disgusting.” She stood up, a huff passing her lips. “I’m gonna go.”

“Bye,” you said, tone matching the gentle melody that was playing in the background.

Soonyoung placed the plate by the center table, and you rested against his shoulder. “Tired?” He asked.

You shrugged, a chuckle passing your lips. “Maybe. Don’t really know.”

“Drunk, aren’t we?” He said, patting your head.

“Drunk,” you confirmed.

While Soonyoung was the quiet and, later on, clingy drunk, you were the giggly type. He lost count on how many times you had laughed at something he said. He didn’t really care that most of it was due to the amount of alcohol in your body. His chest still got bigger, and he still felt validated.

“I can take you home if you want,” he offered. He didn’t really want to, perhaps a bit too entertained by this newfound side of you. It wasn’t that different from your usual behavior, just cuter. Softer, even.

You pouted at him, “I don’t want to sleep alone.”

He giggled, tone somewhat sad. “I can’t stay, the meeting tomorrow is kinda early.” Your pout got bigger. “Don’t make that face.” Soonyoung thought about it for a moment, “Maybe you can crash at my place? I’ll probably go to the meeting and get back before you’re up. Then we can have breakfast.”

Seemed like a pretty good solution, he was happy about it. And from the look on your face, so were you.

When you woke up the next day, Soonyoung wasn’t there. When you took your phone from his nightstand, you were greeted by a couple of texts.

[8:27am] Soon: the meeting’s gonna take longer than i thought :/

[8:27am] Soon: kwan will prob make breakfast, though!

[8:28am] Soon: so just head to the kitchen when you’re up :)

[8:28am] Soon: be there as soon as i can <3

You sighed. That was about half an hour ago. You figured he wouldn’t be back for another hour from what he had said. You wouldn’t be able to go back to sleep. And, when you heard your stomach growl, you figured you wouldn’t be able to wait for him for breakfast, either. So despite the nervousness in your chest, you got up, going to the common space after a quick stop in the bathroom.

You had briefly met Jihoon and Seungkwan the last time you stayed over. So when you appeared by the kitchen, they both greeted you with a smile.

“Good morning,” the youngest said. Jihoon copied his words.

“Morning.” Your voice was low, and you wondered if they noticed how shy you were.

Seungkwan took a plate from the cabinet, placing it by the countertop. “Eggs?”

You nodded, smiling gently. “That would be great.”

Interacting with them proved to be fairly uncomplicated. Seungkwan shared some embarrassing stories on Soonyoung, so you’d have blackmail material when needed. Jihoon and you bonded over music, sharing some recommendations and playlists. They were fun, and you thought Soonyoung was a good match there.

By the time you were almost done with your drink, which took quite a while, you heard the key turning by the door.

“Hi,” Soonyoung said, placing his belongings on the table next to the doorway. “Oh, you’re up.” His face lit up when he saw you.

“She’s been up for a while, so I was just entertaining her with great stories,” Seungkwan said.

You laughed and Soonyoung sighed, “Fuck off, Kwan.” He turned to you, body placed behind your chair. “Hi.”

“Hi,” you said, looking up at him.

He placed a kiss by your forehead and sat by your side. “What did he tell you?”

Things with Soonyoung moved at a steady pace. You kept seeing each other week after week, sometimes more than once. Being next to him felt too good not to do.

Sometimes you wondered if it was too much, too fast. If you were in it alone. But you got some reassurance from the way he looked at you or held your hand. So you allowed yourself to surrender to the dark haired man that had the prettiest eyes you had ever seen.

Lately you were overthinking about something that happened a couple of weeks ago. Krys reached an important milestone on her channel, so everyone decided to come over for drinks to celebrate.

You got stuck in the office for the third time that week. There were a lot of new launches coming up, which meant countless meetings and an extensive workload. So when you got to Krys’, Soonyoung was already buzzed.

You sat by his side on the couch after greeting everyone, and he let out a loud laugh over something Joshua had said. Once he noticed your presence, a big smile formed on his face. “You’re here!” From the sound of his voice, you could tell he was already at the further stages of his drunk persona.

“Hi, Soo.” Some time ago, you started calling him that. You were used to Soon, but it still didn’t feel totally right. The first time ‘Soo’ rolled out of your tongue, you decided that was what you were going to call him.

Soonyoung leaned in to give you a kiss almost immediately. Once he let you go, he turned to Joshua again, keeping a steady hand by your thigh.

Krys was seated in front of you, and you shot her a glance. “What?” She asked in fake confusion.

You pointed at Soonyoung discreetly, “I know this is on you.”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.” She held back a laugh, moving from her spot to disappear into the kitchen.

You placed a hand on Soonyoung’s shoulder in an attempt to get his attention. It worked. When he turned to you, he had a foolish grin and his cheeks were red. “Having fun?” You asked.

He nodded much like a child, “Very much.” He placed a peck by your cheek, “Missed you, though.”

You brushed the hair out of his face, “Missed you too.” You offered him a gentle smile, “On a scale of one to ten?”

Whenever Soonyoung drank with you around, you eventually asked how drunk he was. Especially as he had the tolerance of a child. You weren’t trying to control him, you would never really do that. The thing was that, for as long as people offered, he would drink. He had a hard time saying no. So if he was at any number after seven, it meant it was time to slow down before it got worse. Mostly because he knew it’d be awful if he went over that point. So he gave you a pass to warn him once he was at his limit, almost as if to remind him of it. And if it was way too much, you could even cut off the shots. That was his own suggestion after he ended the night throwing up on your toilet after being too caught up in Krys’ drinking games.

Soonyoung thought about it for a moment, “The truth?” You giggled, nodding. “Eight.” Damn, were you that late? Or did your friend just do you dirty?

You rubbed his cheek, “Hmkay. Maybe let’s drink some water?” He agreed.

Before you could stand up to go get it, Krys showed up with another bottle of soju. “Another shot, Soonyoung?” She said, voice full of tease.

You scoffed, “Are you trying to kill my boyfriend?”

Her eyebrows moved up in a surprised look, “Oh, so he’s your boyfriend?”

Soonyoung never brought it up. You honestly wondered if he remembered or if he even heard it. The two of you had been together for about two months now. The topic of being in a relationship didn’t really come up, so you just left it at that. You didn’t know why, but ever since you accidentally referred to him as your boyfriend, you started to wonder if that’s what he wanted. As for your wishes, you didn’t have to think. Soonyoung was too engraved in your heart for you to be opposed to making things official.

It was Sunday. You and Soonyoung were in your room watching whatever movie he had chosen, but you weren't paying attention. His head was by your chest, arms wrapped around your middle while you patted his hair.

“Can I ask you something?” He said, pulling your eyes from the TV screen. He sounded serious. You looked down at him and nodded. “Do we have one butt or two butts?”

You let out a groan, “Are you fucking serious?” Soonyoung was insane. You often wondered how his mind worked, and you were never really able to come up with a response.

He laughed, placing a kiss by your collarbone. “It’s a genuine question!” Soonyoung just loved to rile you up. He enjoyed, perhaps a bit too much, the way you acted as if he was crazy. Maybe he was. But you were still around, so this could only mean you liked it.

Besides, whenever he said something stupid, he often found you with this one look. It was a very specific one. Like you tried to keep a straight face, doing your best to suppress your lips from curving upwards, but didn’t really succeed because you liked him too much.

“I can’t believe you,” you shook your head, holding back a giggle.

“Personally, I think it’s one butt and two butt cheeks.” He gave you a small bite, and you tried to push him away.

Your eyes moved to the back of your head, “I’m breaking up with you.”

Soonyoung sat up slightly, a foolish grin on his face. “Oh, so we’re dating dating?” Heat started spreading through your body, and you felt your heart beating slightly faster. You couldn’t respond, so you just stared at him with nervous eyes. He moved to lay on top of you, “Great! Does this mean you’re my girlfriend?”

“Shut up,” you said, trying to look away from his gaze.

He giggled, “Am I your boyfriend?” Soonyoung leaned in again, lips by the side of your neck.

“No.”

“I am.” Soonyoung couldn’t hide his smile, it evidently showing while he kissed your skin.

You huffed, doing your best not to let the rush of excitement that was washing over you show. “You’re so annoying.”

It was one of those days. You felt like pure and complete shit. Work was awful, to say the least. There was a lot going on at the label, and you were beyond overloaded. One of your colleagues had quit, your supervisor dropping all of his assignments on your lap. The worst part was that none of it was your scope. You felt like you weren’t doing anything properly, like you would never do anything properly. You hated working with the feeling of not knowing what you were doing. It made you anxious and incapable.

You were, generally speaking, an insecure person. Sometimes it creeped up within you before you could actually realize it in order to stop it. And once it started, it was like a relentless spiral. It washed over you, and, when it did, you couldn’t separate things. It was something about work? Well, fuck it. Let’s just unload every single aspect about you and your life that might possibly make you feel insecure and mope around for days until you were able to put it all back in the bag you carried around with all of your trauma. Because why the fuck not. Why would you be an emotionally intelligent person and know that feeling bad over work doesn’t mean you need to feel the same about your friendships or your relationship or every other area in your life? The line there was too thin, too blurry. You could barely see it.

Your insecurities usually danced around not feeling loved and not being enough. Around that disgusting sense of being irrelevant and unimportant. And you hated it. You hated how you projected it and how you couldn’t properly cope with it, closing yourself off until it went away. Doki and Krys were somewhat used to it, the first living with you for long enough to know that it passes, and the second being your friend for long enough to know you’d get over it. They did their best to comfort you whenever it happened, though, making your favorite foods and just being around to let you know that you were very much loved. Soonyoung, however, hadn’t experienced that part just yet. And that only added up to the fuel within your chest. You wondered if he’d leave at the first sign of trouble. Because, up until now, things were easy and fun and effortless. But, today, you couldn’t keep that up. You could barely process all the thoughts that ran through your mind, let alone be the enjoyable person you were with him. You didn’t feel comfortable enough in your own skin for that.

Soonyoung texted you multiple times during the day as usual, you responding once to let him know you were busy, words drier than normal. He asked if everything was okay and, obviously, you lied. You trusted Soonyoung, so it wasn’t really about that. It was just that stupid little voice inside your head telling you that, at the slightest sign of vulnerability, he’d walk out. Because, well, why wouldn’t he? So you just swallowed it all in and told him that yes, you were fine.

When you got home, you found a note from Doki that they were at a cooking class with Joshua and that they’d only get back the next day. At least that meant you’d be able to cry as loud as you wanted, for as long as you wanted. You dropped your belongings by the kitchen counter, not caring enough to take them to your bedroom. You thought of showering immediately, but you had no strength for that yet, deciding to rest by the living room for some time. You turned on the TV, putting on whatever Netflix had recommended, and laying in the comfortable couch. You curled up, legs by your chest and hands under the pillow, not focusing on anything besides the voices on the show.

Apparently, you had fallen asleep, because when you realized, you were being woken up by the sound of the intercom. You sighed in distress. You hadn’t invited anyone over and Doki theoretically had keys. Did they purchase anything that was supposed to be delivered? At this hour? New pans? You had no place to put anything else, every single cabinet filled with their work stuff.

You got up, feet dragging against the wooden floor. “Yes?” The tone in your voice was clearly not the best.

“Baby?” Wait. Was that Soonyoung? When you didn’t respond, he called your name.

Another sigh escaped you, “What are you doing here?” You didn’t mean to sound so accusatory, cursing mentally as soon as the words were out.

You heard his laugh and your shoulders were slightly lighter. “I came to see you. Can you buzz me in, please?”

You pressed the button reluctantly and, not long after, Soonyoung was by your door, a gentle smile on his lips. “Hi,” his voice was as soft as he looked. His hair was down, slightly peeking out of his beanie. His legs were covered by some black sweats, just like his torso and he had a fluffy coat on top. This November in particular had been colder than usual.

When you stepped to the side, so he could walk in, he placed a kiss by your cheek. “What are you doing here?” You asked again, but in the right tone this time.

Soonyoung removed his coat and beanie, putting them by the shelf, and closed the door behind him. “I’m kinda worried.” He took in your tired features, “You ok?”

You nodded, a bit too scared to say too much and let something show. You weren’t particularly good at hiding your feelings. That was part of why you just closed off when you were like this. You didn’t want to discuss it, nor could you hide. So self-isolating seemed the next best thing. “I’m fine.”

He squinted his eyebrows at you, “No, you’re not.” Soonyoung wasn’t the best at reading people, so he was grateful that he found himself a transparent person. It would for sure save him the trouble. Perhaps that’s exactly why you two were such a good match. He pulled you close, fingers lacing by the low of your back. “What’s going on?”

You felt your eyes threatening to burn, meaning that tears would come anytime soon. You sighed, “Don’t really want to talk about it.”

His lips found your cheek again, gentle pecks being placed repetitively against your skin. “That’s ok. Maybe let’s take a shower?” He offered. “Should help you relax a bit,” he smiled at you fondly, and, for a second, it was almost as if you had no worries. When you nodded, he kissed you again, on the lips, this time. It was delicate, as if he was too scared to break you. “C’mon.”

Even though Soonyoung smelled like he had just come out of the shower, probably finishing a class not long ago, he still went in with you. He rubbed your shoulders, paying them extra attention, fingers gently massaging the stiff muscles. He cleaned your face, hands running against your jaw and your cheeks. He didn’t say much besides some commands like telling you to turn around, so he could wash your back, or telling you to close your eyes, so he could let some water run over them. His hands were kind, his touch soft. Once you were done, he wrapped you in your towel, rubbing your arms and smiling at you. He seemed so tender that, for an instant, you didn’t feel like he would run away from you if you shed a tear or two. You actually got the impression that he would just pull himself as close as possible, so he could hold you until it was all okay again.

It was probably a bit too early for you to be lying down, but you didn’t really care. Soonyoung made you food, settling for some simple instant noodles. It was a good change from the fancier and elaborate food Doki usually feeds you. Once you were done, he did the dishes and then placed you in bed.

The TV was on as background noise once again. You were pressed against Soonyoung’s chest, his arm drawing random patterns by your back, legs intertwined. His other hand held yours, warmth irradiating in every possible way. You sighed heavily, and he looked down at you, “You sure you don’t wanna talk about it?”

You blinked heavily, feeling tears pooling at your eyes once again, “It’s stupid.”

His finger held your chin to make your gaze meet his, “It’s not stupid. If it’s bothering you, it’s not stupid.” He kissed your forehead, “You don’t have to talk if you don’t want to.” As if he could read your mind, the next words that left his lips filled you up with reassurance, “I just want you to know that I’m not going anywhere if you do.”

So you chose to believe him, instead of the damaging voice at the back of your head. You gave Soonyoung a bit of an overview, how sometimes, during bad days, something seemed to trigger every single insecurity you had developed throughout the years. How you felt replaceable and insignificant. How it didn’t matter where it started, it all ended up taking over everything. A small tear hit Soonyoung’s sweatshirt. “I sometimes just feel like no one actually loves me and—”

“Wait, what?” He stared at you. Damn, how you liked his eyes.

You let out a breath, “It’s just—”

He pulled you closer to him, as if that was even possible. “You know I love you, right?”

“W-what?” The two of you had never exchanged those words. Theoretically, he teased you often with an ‘I know you love me’ whenever he made you particularly annoyed. But that was pretty much it. You knew you loved him, figuring it out probably a couple of weeks ago when he fell asleep on you while you facetimed, but you haven’t found the way or the moment to voice it out for him yet. Maybe that was linked to how your insecurities were peaking up for the past couple of days. You were scared he didn’t really feel the same, even though he was giving you all the right signs.

Soonyoung smiled brightly, “I love you. So much.” He wasn’t the smartest with feelings, he knew that. But there was a spark in his heart that popped from the first time he saw you that never really went away. Soonyoung often acted like a child - he felt something good, but didn’t really know what triggered it, so he pressed all the buttons in a desperate attempt to feel it again. But, when it came to this, it was fairly easy to understand what he needed: you. He understood it was love when he was drunk at Krys’ party, and you accidentally called him your boyfriend. The way his breathing got faster and his chest got instantly warmer made him realize he was in it, and deep. And it just seemed silly that you felt like no one loved you, when he was right there, ready to give you the world if you asked. But only after teasing you about it.

“I—”

“No, let me,” he said, interrupting you in the kindest way he could. You stopped talking, then, waiting for him to continue. “I know we all have our shit to deal with. And I know this is probably something you’ve been working for some time. And that it goes beyond me.” You nodded in agreement. “But whatever I can do to make you understand how amazing you are, I will. If I have to come here and take care of you every day just to show you how much I love you, I will. If I have to say it at every hour, so you start believing it, I will.”

You couldn’t quite explain what you were feeling. You just knew it was washing over you like the most powerful of waves. It was like he was slowly removing the bricks on the wall that kept you separated from everyone when you were having days like this. It was like everything he was saying was so genuine and so heartfelt that you had no choice but to take every single word as the ultimate truth. Especially as Soonyoung wasn’t a very good liar.

Another tear escaped you and, this time, he wiped it with a gentle kiss. His hand moved to your face, fingers cupping your cheek. “I know I tease you all the time, and that you think I'm annoying,” he said, with a chuckle. “But I love you so, so much. I love how comfortable I am around you and how you make me laugh every time we’re together. How you’re so fucking sexy but also so smart. I love how you laugh at my jokes even though you don’t want to because you find them stupid. How you act like you don’t, but you always let me get all over you because you like it as much as I do. I love your eyes and your smile. God, your smile is so pretty. It literally makes me dizzy.” His thumb wiped away another tear, and he giggled, sounding slightly out of breath. “There’s just so much I love about you and I want to make sure you never forget it.”

Soonyoung thought about it for a second before correcting himself. “No, wait. You can forget it sometimes. That’s ok,” he reassured you. “But don’t worry, I’ll always be here to remind you. As long as I’m here, you’re never not loved.”

And then you were fully crying. Just sobbing against his chest while he held you close to him. He whispered praises and loving words by your hair while his hands rubbed your back in comfort. Now, it just seemed so silly that you had the audacity to think that he would do anything besides reassure and shower you with affection and the most selfless of loves. How dare you?

You weren’t sure how long you cried. It didn’t really matter, anyway. Soonyoung’s grip around you never loosened. Once you were finally soothed, he gently dried your face with more kisses and pulled you back against his chest. While his fingers ran through your hair, he spoke again. “You, uh. You love me too, right?”

You giggled, sniffling from all the crying you had just done. When you looked up at him, eyes puffy and red, Soonyoung saw nothing but endearment. You moved the dark strands out of his face. “How could I not?”

“Baby?” Soonyoung called out from your bed. It was late, you should be there with him, not by your desk and working.

“What?”

He whined, “Enough with that.”

You laughed at his antics. “I just need to send a few more emails.”

“It’s literally eleven, you should’ve stopped working when you left the office.”

Soonyoung was a very work oriented person, and so were you. It was funny how the two of you were constantly nagging each other over it, and, at the same time, both quite easily crossing the line and being overworked.

You were so focused on typing that you didn’t hear him shifting on the sheets and huffing in annoyance. When you realized, he was spinning your chair around, hands placed by its arms. “Baby.”

A sigh passed your lips, “I’ll be there soon, I promise.”

He leaned in, face close to yours. Before he could actually say anything, something by your laptop caught his eye. Soonyoung moved his head to the side to get a better look, “Wait, what’s that?”

You turned around to know what he was talking about. “Oh. That.”

It was a frame that held a picture of the two of you. Soonyoung had a beanie on, black shirt and black jacket not that visible. He was scrunching his nose and your cheeks were glued to his, head slightly turned to the side and arms by his shoulders.

“That,” he said, reaching out to hold it and properly inspect it.

“Krys got me the frame the other day and I decided to print the picture and put it here,” you explained. You didn’t really know why, but you felt somewhat shy over this. It was like placing pictures of the two of you around made things more real. Not like they weren’t, but it seemed like an important step.

Soonyoung had a smile on his face, “I like this picture.”

You giggled, “Me too.”

“You look cute,” he pointed out. After a couple more seconds staring at the yellow picture frame, he spoke again, “Damn, you actually love me.”

You shook your head in amusement, “Do not.” You almost scoffed.

He sighed, proudly. “You so love me.”

“There was this one party at Shua's, God. That was a nightmare,” Soonyoung said with a laugh.

Jihoon sighed, “Not this again.” He took a piece of chicken and started eating in silence.

The three of you were having dinner together, alongside Seungkwan. It wasn’t rare for you to come over with food, genuinely enjoying spending time with your boyfriend’s flatmates.

“You know how Jeonghan is, right?”

You knew this story, you had heard it countless times, all of them while Soonyoung was drunk. Still, if it was for his entertainment, you were fine with acting as if you didn’t know that Jeonghan tried to get into Jihoon’s pants once. Seungkwan eyed you in annoyance and you giggled. Their dynamic was always very amusing to you.

Soonyoung took a sip of his Coke, “It was supposed to be a dude’s night or something, I don’t remember that part. And Jihoon was alone at home, so I managed to convince him to come with me. Jeong—”

“Jeonghan hit on me, said I probably had a big dick and then complained that I didn’t want to fuck him. The end.” Jihoon summarized taking another bite of his food.

A frown formed on Soonyoung’s face immediately, “Why did you ruin it?”

“I’m one hundred percent sure she heard this before, but it’s acting like she didn’t just to please you,” Seungkwan teased.

You laughed, fingers dancing through the hair on Soonyoung’s nape, “Leave him alone.”

He pouted at you, “Did I tell you this before?” You couldn’t really contain your look. “Why didn’t you say so?” You found him very cute when he whined.

The youngest huffed. Seungkwan wasn’t your closest friend, but he didn’t really need to be to state the obvious. “Because she loves you, idiot.”

Soonyoung was getting into his head. He knew that, he recognized the patterns. He had messed up more than one relationship over it. It was just that, sometimes, the little voice inside his head spoke louder and clearer than the reality. He felt uneasy, suspicious. He understood that there was no actual reason for that, but that didn’t really matter.

There was so much going on in his life that he didn’t really have the time to stop and calm himself down, getting stuck between overwhelming feelings and self doubts. Work was hectic. He got a pretty big deal to choreograph for an upcoming group, but it wasn’t going as smoothly as he wished.

It was late. Pretty late. You heard the sound of your phone vibrating against your nightstand, and you groaned. Was Soonyoung drinking? No one else would call you at three in the morning. That was usually the reason why he called at this ungodly hour.

“Hi,” you mumbled, voice hoarse in sleep.

A sigh echoed through your ear, “Did I wake you?” He stared at the clock on his dashboard. “Shit, of course I did. I’m sorry.”

You rubbed your eyes in an attempt of being more alert. “It’s fine. Is everything ok?” He didn’t sound drunk. Weird. When he didn’t respond, you questioned him further. “Where are you?”

“I’m just leaving the studio,” he confessed. He knew you’d nag.

“At this hour? Soo, it’s so late, you can’t do this.”

He leaned back against the headrest, “I know.” Soonyoung chewed the insides of his cheek, “Can I come over?”

Something was definitely wrong. “Uh. Yeah, sure.” He exhaled in relief. “Just call me when you’re here, and I’ll open up.”

“Hmkay.”

It usually took him about twenty minutes by car from the studio to your place, but due to the late night lack of traffic, he got there sooner. When you opened the door, he hugged you immediately, arms wrapping around your waist. “Hi,” Soonyoung mumbled over your shoulder.

“Hi?” You were very confused at this point, tone a clear mix between sleepiness and concern. “What’s going on?”

“Can we just go to bed?” He pulled back, the bags under his eyes very evident now.

You removed his hair from his face, thumb gentle against his forehead. “I’m kinda worried.”

He let out a sad chuckle, “Let’s just cuddle, I’ll tell you in a bit.” For some reason, whenever he was in your arms, he felt like nothing could ever go wrong. That was his favorite place.

Once the two of you got comfortable, Soonyoung’s head against your chest and your fingers rubbing circles against his back, you asked again. “What’s up?”

He gathered some courage first, silence filling up the room until he was ready to speak up. “I fucking suck.”

You looked down on him, “I hope you’re not referring to dancing.” He sighed, eyes the saddest you had ever seen. “Hey, no. You do not suck.”

“Then why can’t I get on with this damn choreography? I sit there for hours. Hours, baby.” Soonyoung pressed his head further against you. “Nothing comes. They’re calling me almost every day to know when I’ll have something to present. I have nothing. I’m scared they’ll drop me and hire someone else.”

This was a new side of Soonyoung. He was usually confident. Overly confident, even. So seeing him doubt himself like that made your heart ache.

He let out another long breath. “I’m not used to feeling like this. This is the only thing I know I’m actually really, really good at,” he confessed. “But now I feel like in a goddamn rut where nothing makes sense. Every move I come up with looks so bad and unfitting.”

You chose to wait until he was done speaking to respond. He kept going for some time, mind racing much like his heart. He rambled and groaned and, if you looked close enough, you’d see his glossy eyes under the moonlight.

“You done?” You asked, gently, once he seemed to have calmed down a little. You kinda wanted to move a bit, so you could properly look at him, but you decided against it. You felt like he’d take more comfort in a hug than in your truthful stare.

“Yeah,” he whispered.

“Things get tough sometimes, Soo. But that doesn’t mean you suck,” you reminded him. “I’ve seen you dance more than once. I’ve seen the things you come up with. The way you look when you’re doing it is probably one of my favorite things about you.” Your mind went back to the first time you saw him dancing, stopping by at the studio to drop off something he forgot at your place. It was mesmerizing. “You glow when you’re dancing. It’s like you’re a different person, like there’s this, I don’t know, aura around you. That’s your element. Nothing will ever be as breathtaking as that. At least for me.”

Your fingers went to his chin to make him look up at you, and you offered him a sincere smile. “I’m not saying this because I’m your girlfriend. I’m saying it because I know this is your path. You were born for this. And a small rut won’t change that.” You knew very little about dancing. Soonyoung shared some stuff with you and picked up a bit from working in the music industry, even if not in the front lines. But you weren’t an expert. “Change your perspective. Try to choreograph in a different place. Watch some videos. Talk to Chan, or Jun. Ask for help. That’s ok, that doesn’t make you weak or any less talented.”

He seemed to be considering your suggestions, eyes drifting on possibilities. “You can do this, Soo. You’re the most passionate person I’ve ever met. This is your thing. You got this.”

Soonyoung pouted, and you giggled, leaning in to give him a small kiss. “I’ll always be your number one supporter, no matter what. I believe in you so much, and it hurts to see you like this.” You kissed his forehead now, his nose moving in a scrunch. “But it’s okay, I know it happens. And I’ll be here to take care of you when it does.”

He made some progress on the choreography, but nothing that significant. Chan helped him a lot, but he still felt somewhat stuck. His deadline was coming up, and he was genuinely panicking at this point. On top of that, Soonyoung kept going over stupid stuff, and he felt like he was slowly losing his mind.

The two of you were resting on the couch, your head by his lap while ran his fingers through your hair. Your phone buzzed by your stomach, and you unlocked it, tilting the screen slightly so Soonyoung wouldn’t see who the text was from or what it was about. He thought of questioning why you did that. Were you hiding something? Were you bored of him? In the end, he stayed silent, lost in the wave of insecurity that took over him.

Soonyoung knew he wasn’t the most pleasant person on the planet. He wasn’t Seokmin, who was someone so nice that it made him a natural crowd pleaser. He was well aware of the fact that, sometimes, when his friends called him annoying, they kinda meant it. He knew they loved him, but he also knew who he was. He wasn’t that bad, at least he didn't think so. He was just conscious he had quite a personality. He also messed up some relationships over it. This meant that, when he found you, someone who could actually keep up with him and all his craziness, he was a bit too scared to lose it.

The mind was tricky when you were worried. It made you paranoid. Overly aware. Made you overthink. So when his girlfriend did something as small as moving her phone outside his vision camp, it was inevitable that his mind went to weird places.

Theoretically, he had nothing to worry about. Soonyoung was pretty sure you were still very much in love with him. Still, his trust issues seemed to be eating him up alive, taking over every thought and every action. He just didn't know what to do with this feeling that someone was always acting behind his back. And every time he was consumed by it, he ended up doing something absurdly stupid.

Doki moved out from your shared apartment the previous week, them and Joshua taking one step further into their relationship and deciding to live together. You were slightly sad to see them leaving, having been your flatmate for a little over four years now. Still, you were happy Doki found someone who suited them so well.

And it's not like you'd be in bad company, much on the contrary. Instead of you moving out or putting up an ad somewhere, Krys came to live with you. She had a lot of stuff, so you needed some help to move everything. Soonyoung and Seokmin covered that part.

It had been a long day, Soonyoung getting tired out from carrying boxes and setting up furniture. He was sitting by your bed, hair wet and body smelling like your soap, while you went through your wardrobe, collecting something to wear. He showered before you as you were still busy helping Krys with some small details in her new bedroom.

With some sweats in hand, you moved over to Soonyoung, stopping between his legs. “Be back soon,” you said, lips forming a smile. He nodded, not displaying any further reaction. You furrowed your brows at him, “Everything ok?”

“Yeah, don't worry.” He forced a smile.

You were not convinced, fingers moving to lift his chin, allowing you to stare into his eyes. “Sure?”

Another nod, “Sure.” You fixed his hair and he hummed at the touch. “Go shower, you kinda smell,” he said, laughing and putting more effort into making it look like everything was fine.

“Hey!” You pinched his shoulder lightly. “You're supposed to be kind to me.” You kept staring at him. Something was off. “You sure you’re ok?”

He chuckled lowly, “I'm fine, promise.”

You placed a kiss by the top of his head, “Okay.”

Soonyoung rested back on your bed as you walked out, fingers reaching for the remote on the nightstand. Your phone was there, too.

No, he wouldn't do it.

He shook his head in a desperate attempt to make the thought go away. Soonyoung went for one of his favorite movies, trying to distract himself as much as he could. Some time later, he heard the noise of a buzz coming from your nightstand. You just got a text.

No, he wouldn't do it.

Soonyoung bit his lip in distress. Maybe just a peek? That wouldn't hurt, would it? He just really needed to make sure you were both still on the same page. Did he even have time for that? He didn't know how long it had been since you went to shower, but figured it wouldn't take much for you to come back.

No, he wouldn't do it.

He let out a sigh, hands moving towards the piece of furniture, but going back to his lap right after. Soonyoung tapped his finger against his thigh. It was like his hand was itching and tingling and the only thing that could stop it was doing something he knew you'd probably get pissed about.

Okay, he did it.

Soonyoung took the black device in his hands, eyes staring at the screen. He couldn't even blink. His heart was racing, and he felt like he was about to pass out. He placed the phone on his lap and rubbed his palms against his shorts, the sweat over them highlighting his anxious state. Once they were slightly dryer, he picked it up again and, in an impulsive movement, he pressed the side button.

Of course, how could he forget? It was passcode protected, and he realized he didn't know how to unlock it. He stared at your lockscreen for a bit, a picture of you and him that you took in the elevator of his building. This was probably for the best. Now he could just place the phone back where it was and beat himself up secretly for doing something so ridiculous. Before he could do that, you opened the door, making him look up from the object in front of him. Soonyoung froze in place, elbows by his thigh and your phone obviously by his grip.

You looked at him in confusion, not saying anything for a couple of seconds. You blinked once, twice, trying to understand what he was doing. “Is that—"

“I'm sorry,” he said, immediately regretting his actions. “I didn't look. I mean, I’m an idiot, so I kinda tried to, but I don't know the passcode. So I didn't see anything. I don't know why I did this. It's just that. Uh. It vibrated. So I thought it might've been something important. So I picked it up. But I didn't read anything,” he rambled.

You furrowed your eyebrows at him, closing the door behind you. “Why did you try to go through my phone?” Your tone was slightly angry. But definitely less than he thought it would be when he imagined your reaction if you caught him.

Soonyoung sighed, “Because I'm stupid.” He had no other explanation. “And because I’m scared,” he confessed, voice barely a whisper.

You let out a breath, moving to sit facing him on the bed. Before you spoke, you took the remote and turned off the TV. “Scared of what, exactly?” His eyes were down, hands on his lap while he played with his fingers. He didn't respond, so you pushed further. “You’re gonna have to talk to me, Soonyoung.” You didn't sound harsh. It was more like you were really trying to understand what was going on, so you could talk about it and move past it.

He scratched the back of his neck, “You remember that day we were watching Tangled in the living room?” You nodded. “At some point, you, uh, you got a text.”

“Okay?” You weren't following.

“You got a text and then you kinda. You kinda turned your screen away, so I wouldn't see it?” Soonyoung felt like his heart was about to come out of his chest, just not in a good way.

Your eyes went wide in disbelief, “Wait a minute. You think I’m cheating on you?”

“No!” His voice was slightly louder now, desperate to take that idea out of your head. You looked at him and, if he stared long enough, he’d see you were slightly hurt. There he went again, allowing his stupid issues to ruin what was probably one of the best things that had ever happened to him. “I-I don't know what I think.”

“You’re gonna have to figure it out and tell me. Because, honestly, it does not look good,” you said, truthfully.

“I know,” he whined. He took a couple of breaths in order to calm himself down. Soonyoung had a terrible habit of saying whatever came to his mind, but he couldn't do this now. Especially as he had no fucking clue what was even there. He had never been so confused. Still, he had to explain somehow. “I’m just scared to lose you.” That was probably the best way he could summarize it.

“Soonyoung, I—”

“Look,” he said, interrupting you. “I sometimes have this feeling that someone is always hiding something from me. Like there's something going on behind my back and, when shit hits the fan, it will break me into a million pieces. So, I don't know, I get paranoid and try to not let it catch me by surprise.”

You pursed your lips, “This sounds a lot like you think I’m cheating on you. And like you don't trust me.”

Soonyoung shook his head vehemently, “It's not about you. It's about me.” He took your hand in his, palms once again slightly sweaty. When you didn’t pull away, he relaxed slightly. “I trust you so, so much. Maybe more than I have ever trusted anyone. But this… I can't really control it sometimes. I just kept thinking over and over again what could you possibly be texting that you had to turn your screen away. And it drove me crazy that I couldn't come up with anything.” He squeezed your hand as if he was trying to prove a point. “I know you would never do this to me. It's just hard to not listen to this little voice in the back of my mind telling me I’m not seeing something. Or that you might be tired of me because, well, I know how I am. I know people can get ti—”

“So that's what this is about? You think I’m gonna break up with you?”

“Not exactly.” He wondered why you kept trying to guess what he was thinking if every guess you took was wrong. “I just love you so much that the thought of losing you is literally driving me insane these days. And I know this isn't a good enough argument to do something as invasive as almost going through your phone. Especially as I probably would have done it if it wasn't for the passcode.” Soonyoung sighed. “I know this is pointless, because I know you love me. But this thing is a bit too hard to ignore sometimes.”

The two of you sat in silence for some time and, after clearing his thoughts a bit, he spoke again. “I've fucked up with other people because of how I am. And I know we talked about it before, but there was this one girlfriend I had… It didn't last long. But she tried to change me.” You remembered him mentioning this in one of your first dates. “She tried to change me, and she just made me feel so bad about myself. She said I was too loud, too impulsive, too much all the time. And I felt trapped, because I like who I am. So, in the end, she broke up with me because she got tired.” He looked at you, an endeared smile across his face. “So when I met you, someone who can so easily accept me, who makes me feel comfortable and loved, I just don't want to risk it.”

You took some time to process his words. “What you did is not okay,” you said, and he nodded in agreement. “But I get it. Can I just ask you something?”

“Anything.”

You bit your lip, “Did anything else happen beside the text thing? Am I not showing you how much I actually love you?”

He shook his head in response, “No, it was just that.” You eyed him closely, trying to read past his gaze. “I promise. There's a lot going on lately, and I just haven't been able to manage my feelings well. When you call me annoying, I know you're joking. But lately it felt like it might be true. It was fueling everything up.”

You reached for his cheek, cupping it gently, “I’m sorry.”

“It's okay,” he said, leaning on your hand. “I know it's how we work.” Soonyoung smiled, thinking of the dynamic the two of you had built together. He wouldn't change it for the world. “I shouldn't overthink it.”

“Still, I don't want to do anything that makes you feel like that,” you mentioned. You brushed his hair out of his face, hands then moving down to lace your fingers together. “I love you so, so much. I had never been in a relationship that gets me this comfortable or shows me I’m this important. I love the way you make me feel, and I will not give up on that anytime soon. Okay?” Soonyoung nodded, eyes disappearing in a smile. “You'll just have to trust me when I say I actually can't live without you.”

You raised yourself out of the mattress to sit on Soonyoung’s lap, your gaze easily meeting his. His hands went immediately to your waist, while yours moved to the side of his neck. "I love you, okay? I’m not going anywhere.”

“Okay,” he said, voice calmer. “I love you, too.”

“Good,” you said, leaning in for a kiss. “There's one more thing,” you said, pulling back.

He opened his eyes, whining at the loss of contact. “What?”

"If anything like this happens again, promise you’ll talk to me before you decide to do something stupid like snoop through my phone?”

Soonyoung giggled in embarrassment, “Promise.” So you kissed him again, doing your best to let your actions reassure him as much as your words seemed to do.

The two of you stayed like that for a while, settling down for a movie later on. Once the credits started rolling, Soonyoung whispered your name.

“What?”

He sighed, “Will you be mad if I ask you what the text was about?” Soonyoung wanted to let this go. He really did. And the talk the two of you had helped a lot. He just had this one last doubt he needed to get rid of.

“Babe,” you said, with a laugh. “It's about your Christmas gift. I sent it to Joshua’s place because you’ve been hanging around here a lot. I want it to be a surprise.” He felt so fucking stupid. “So he was just sending me pictures of it because it got delivered.”

Soonyoung blinked a couple of times. “God, I’m an idiot.”

You nodded against his chest. “Yes, you are.”

“I’m sorry again,” he said, placing a kiss at the top of your head.

“It’s okay.”

“Baby?” He called you again, and you looked up at him. “Is the gift tiger related?”

“I just think it's funny how whenever I wanted to throw Christmas parties, Doki would groan and shut the idea out,” you said, while taking another sip of your blackberry mule. “And now, here we are.”

You loved Christmas. It was your favorite holiday. You loved decorating, and you loved wrapping gifts, despite your poor manual skills. Doki couldn't care less. So you spent four years asking them to help you with setting up the tree, only to now have them hosting a Christmas dinner. It came with being in love, you guessed. You had compromised over quite some stuff for Soonyoung as well.

You were all at Joshua’s for a dinner and some drinks. You were sitting between Soonyoung and Krys, while Jeonghan, Seokmin and Seungkwan were on the opposite side, leaving the hosts to sit by the ends of the table. Jihoon had a work thing, so he couldn't tag along, which made Jeonghan quite upset as, according to him, this time he would’ve managed to get himself some good dick.

Doki rolled their eyes, while taking a bite of their rib. “Leave me alone.” Joshua looked at them with endearment in his eyes.

Krys caught it, “You guys are gross.”

“You're just bitter because you’re single,” her brother teased, giving her his tongue. Jeonghan raised an eyebrow and looked at his flatmate.

“Anyway, who wants more soju?” She said, standing up with a sigh.

Soonyoung started drinking later on, when you were already kinda buzzed. He took a couple of shots with Krys and, not long after, was singing whatever song on the karaoke while Seungkwan yelled at him that he was ruining everything.

You were sitting by the couch with Doki, while Krys was lost somewhere in the kitchen with Seokmin. “When do you think she’ll stop being dense? He’s literally like a puppy around her.”

Doki sighed, “I don't know.” They poured two more shots, watching the current subject return to the living room with her faithful companion by her side. “We need to be drunk for this.”

“I kinda already am,” you giggled. You two clinked glasses and got the soju in.

“That's something I haven't seen in a while, you and Soonyoung drunk at the same time.” Krys said, plopping down beside you. The two of you had very different tolerances. When you were reaching your limit, that meant he was literally dead or about to pass out. When he was reaching his limit, that meant you were hardly tipsy. Meeting in the middle was almost an event.

You looked at your boyfriend, his voice echoing through the place while Seokmin joined him. “I think he missed it, that's why he didn't drink right when we got here.” There was something fun and exciting about being inebriated with him and, honestly speaking, you missed it too.

As time passed, drinks flew in, countless empty bottles of soju placed by the center table. It was Jeonghan’s turn, and he was singing to Aquaman while everyone hyped him up. You were having a conversation with Joshua and Krys on something he was planning on giving to Doki for Christmas, when Soonyoung appeared by your side.

“Hi,” he said, face red.

“When does it get delivered?” Krys asked. He had decided to send it over to your place, much like you did to Soonyoung’s gift.

Soonyoung moved over the soft fabric, arms reaching for your neck. “When does what get delivered?” He asked, placing kisses by your cheek.

“Doki's gift,” you responded, giggling at his actions.

He furrowed his brows, “Didn't you just give them the stove?”

Joshua rolled his eyes, “It’s not a stove. It's a Lacanche Range. And yes, but that was for both of us, so I’m getting them something else.”

Soonyoung hummed in acknowledgment, not really interested in that at the moment. He got closer, legs moving to try to sit on your lap.

The man shot him a face, “Can you please not try to have sex on my couch?”

Krys let out a laugh, “Can you even get it up? You're fucked already.”

If you were sober, you would probably hush for everyone to be quiet. But as the alcohol was pumping in, all you did was shake your head in amusement.

“Yes, I didn't drink that much yet,” he confessed. Joshua looked disgusted.

“In that case, Josh’s room is right there,” she teased.

His eyes went wide, “You are absolutely not doing it in my room!”

Krys thought about it for a second, pointing down the hallway, “You can go for the bathroom, then.”

Ok, it was getting too much. Joshua looked like he was about to commit a crime or at least ban a few of you from his house. “Can you all shut up?” You said, doing your best to hold back a laugh. “Soo, baby, please sit down.”

He moved closer to you, lips in a smirk. “I’m trying to.”

“Urgh, you guys are absolutely nasty,” Joshua said, standing up and walking away.

Sometime later, you were by the kitchen pouring yourself some water. You needed to calm down a little, head spinning more than usual. You were placing the glass by the sink when you felt arms around your waist.

“Missed you,” Soonyoung said, chin resting by your shoulder.

You laughed, “I was gone for like three minutes.”

“That's too long.” He stepped back for a moment just so he could spin you around, palms then placed by the counter. Soonyoung gave you a tempting smile, “I have an idea.”

You raised an eyebrow at him, knowing damn well that this would probably be something insane. “What?”

He moved closer, hips pressing against yours. “I kinda have to go to the bathroom.”

“You're not serious.” He did nothing but smirk at you, the usual fire behind his eyes now more present than ever. “We can't do that.”

He whined, “Why not?”

You rested your hands by his chest, “All of our friends are here. We can't just go fuck in the bathroom.”

His shoulders moved in a shrug, “Why not?” He sounded like a broken record. “It's not like they don't know we have sex.” Soonyoung did have a good point. He moved his hips once again, the friction going straight to your core. A small moan passed your lips. “See? I think you kinda want it.”

You would probably never do this sober. Ever. Especially with the friends you had, they would never let you live through it. And once they realized where you were and what you were doing, the disturbance would be endless. But, just for tonight, you allowed yourself to be indulged by Soonyoung's adventurous nature. So you took his hand and allowed him to drag you towards the bathroom between giggles and kisses.

He had you seated by the sink counter, keeping himself between your legs while he bit on your neck. As you didn't really have to face the cold weather, you decided to put on a skirt, something you were very thankful for now. You adjusted yourself, “Wait, what if we break it?”

Soonyoung laughed against your skin, “Then we probably won't be able to come here for some time.” He licked on the spot right below your ear. “But it seems strong, don't worry.”

He was right. You just felt dizzy, and you weren't sure if it was on the booze or on how good Soonyoung felt. Your thoughts were clouded, but you didn’t really care. Your hands moved to his ass, pressing him closer against you.

Your boyfriend let out a growl. “I won't last long today. I’m half hard already,” he confessed. Yeah, you could feel it. And, honestly, it wasn’t difficult to get Soonyoung in the mood. It was like he was always ready, waiting only for you to give him a sign.

“Thank God,” you mumbled in half a moan. He let out a chuckle. If it was up to him, the two of you would fuck every day, for at least four hours.

He raised your skirt up to your waist, the contact with the cold surface causing goosebumps to appear against your skin. "Take this off,” Soonyoung said, referring to your already damp underwear.

You whined, “For what? Just push it to the side.” He was a bit unpractical sometimes. You went for his belt and, not long after, his jeans were by his knees.

Soonyoung did as he was told, moving the lacy fabric out of the way. A teasing finger ran through your folds. “Pretty wet, aren’t we?” He pulled away, but before you could protest, your mouth got busy. His eyes were stuck in yours while you licked his fingers, tongue swirling against his digits.

The way Soonyoung looked at you during sex was something you couldn’t get used to. It didn’t really matter how many times you saw it, it would always make you shiver. It was passionate, almost as if he needed you more than anything else in the world. And, sometimes, or always, you couldn’t really tell now, he really did.

His lips replaced his fingers, and you hummed against them. You loved kissing him. You had been doing that for months now and the thrill was still there. You still got the same damn sparks you got when you first kissed on your second date. You felt like that would never go away.

Your hands moved down, reaching for him through his boxers. Your fingertips traced the outline of his cock, touch featherweight. He let out a moan and you swallowed it. “Don’t tease,” he mumbled.

Soonyoung’s hands started roaming through your body while his lips were still attached to yours. He squeezed your hips, cupped your breasts, pinched your thighs. It was like he was trying to memorize every inch of you. Once he was back where you needed, he spread your juices, slowly pushing a finger in. You were too wet already for his actions to give you anything besides pleasure.

You finally pulled his cock out, hand immediately wrapping around it. “How are you this hard already?” You asked with a giggle when pulling away to catch your breath for a moment.

“It’s because you’re so fucking hot I can’t help it.” You felt your cheeks heating up at his answer. Soonyoung had always made you feel good in more ways than one, praises escaping him in the easiest of tones.

“Move faster,” you begged. While his middle finger was inside you, his thumb pressed on your clit. He knew exactly how you liked it. Sometimes you wondered if you were that easy to read, or if your sexual chemistry was just extraordinary right from the start despite the obvious difference in resistance. Your forehead rested against his shoulder, lips between your teeth in an attempt not to make too much noise.

His cock felt warm against your palm, the tip red and wet with precum. Spitting a bit on your hand, you gripped his length once again, slightly tighter this time, and he moaned. “Fuck, so good, baby.” You started moving up and down, doing your best not to concentrate solemnly on Soonyoung’s finger.

That was not enough. You needed more. “Add another.” He would never deny that to you. His ring finger then joined his middle one, curling up almost instantly. Slick sounds were filling up the room. It was too easy to get riled up, especially when Soonyoung was that good.

The position was a bit messy, arms tangled between your bodies while you reached for one another. Still, it was clearly working from all the pants and moans that escaped the two of you.

Focusing on his tip, your wrist turned in quick motions. Soonyoung threw his head back, clearly lost in the sensations. “I never want this to end.”

You moved your head up to his neck, teeth grazing against the sensitive skin. “I’m not edging you.” That was how he lasted for hours, through countless edging sessions. You didn’t have time for that, nor the patience.

Soonyoung giggled, fingers moving even quicker. He applied some more pressure on your clit, and you whimpered. He took great pride in the way he could always make you moan. “So tight.”

You felt hot. It was like the room was on fire and your body was about to combust. When he hit a particularly good spot, you cursed. “Fuck.” Your head was spinning, and it was like being tipsy made everything more intense.

When Soonyoung felt you clench harder around him, he picked up the pace. “You’re close, right?” He knew it, he always knew it. But he liked to ask just to fuel his ego.

You nodded, eyes closing shut. “Very close.” You were having a hard time keeping your movements up, especially when you were almost there.

Soonyoung noticed, quickly reassuring you. “Let go of my cock for a second, it’s ok.” You didn’t protest, hands reaching for his shoulder in a desperate attempt to keep yourself grounded. You’d take care of him soon. His free hand went to your chin, fingers pressing on your jaw. “Look at me. I want you to look at me while you cum.”

You let out a cry, chest moving up and down rapidly. Just a bit more. “Shit, right there.”

“Tell me how it feels.”

“So good. Fuck. So, so good.” You couldn’t think straight. All you could think was of how amazing Soonyoung’s fingers felt. The way he eyed you made you feel bare.

He leaned in, placing a quick peck by your lips. His thumb moved faster, the sensations making you moan louder than you probably should. If someone came by the door, they’d most likely hear you. At this point, you couldn’t care less. You were too close and this felt too good.

“Please, I’m so close, please.”

Soonyoung liked when you begged. “You can cum, baby.” You squeezed around him, the sounds coming out of your pussy making your moans almost inaudible considering the music from the living room. He stared into your eyes and smiled. “Cum for me.”

With a couple more thrusts, you were done. Soonyoung’s grip never left your jaw, neither did the grin he had on his features. You cried his name in a moan while he helped you through your high. He wanted to engrave that image in his head forever, much like every single time he made you cum. He thought you looked the most beautiful then, face glowing as small droplets of sweat rolled down, expression stuck in pure bliss. He loved knowing he did that do you, loved knowing the effect he had on you.

You took some time to recover, head by the crook of his neck once he let go of your face. He rubbed your arms slowly, “You’re so sexy.”

Placing a kiss by his skin, you let out a laugh. “You’re so silly.”

“I’m serious,” he said. “The sexiest woman I have ever met.”

You pulled back, taking his cock in your hands again. Soonyoung hissed at the contact. “Thanks, babe.”

“I won’t last long,” he repeated. His lips were trapped between his teeth, hair slightly stuck on his forehead. He was simply mesmerizing.

“Wait,” you said, lifting yourself up from the counter and adjusting your skirt. You got on your knees and looked up at him with a smile. “We can’t get cum anywhere or Doki will kill us.”

Soonyoung laughed, head moving in a nod. “Smart.”

When your lips wrapped around his cock, head instantly bobbing up and down, he felt pure ecstasy. He loved everything about you, but the way you looked when you had his cock in your mouth was one of his favorites. One of your hands cupped his balls while the other one was placed by the base of his member, holding it still, so you could suck him off properly.

His hand went to your hair, fingers tangling against your locks. Soonyoung couldn’t turn his eyes away from you. When you took him deeper, the tip hitting the back of your throat, he whined. “Feels so good.”

He started thrusting into your mouth slowly. Soonyoung had always known how to move his hips. You then rested your hands by his thighs, his grip on your hair tightening, understanding what you meant even though you didn’t voice it. You focused on breathing through your nose while he fucked your face, eyes slightly watering.

A bit after, he pulled you away by your hair, “You’re gonna drive me insane.”

You smiled up at him, “Good.” He smiled back, watching as you stick your tongue out, so you could take him again.

Much like he had predicted, Soonyoung didn’t last long. He thrust into your mouth a couple more times before you felt the taste of his cum against your tongue, swallowing every drop. Once his hips stopped moving, your lips focused on his tip while your palms twisted around his length. “Fuck,” he cursed at the overstimulation, pulling himself away from you not long after with a laugh.

He helped you stand up and wrapped his arms around your waist, “We should do this more often.”

You shook your head, lips curving upwards. “We shouldn’t. I’ll hear enough for the rest of our lives.”

The two of you fixed yourselves before going back out, washing your hands and adjusting your clothes. You used some cotton to clean your smudged make up while Soonyoung pulled up his pants and buckled his belt.

He fixed your hair, hands then moving to cup your face. “I love you.”

You giggled at his sudden words, “Love you, too.”

You checked yourself in the mirror one last time just to make sure your sex face wasn’t that apparent. It’s not like everyone didn’t know what you were doing, but you’d like to be at least presentable for all the comments you’d have to digest.

When you and Soonyoung came walking through the hallway, his arm against your shoulder and yours by his waist, smiles very, very bright, Krys was the first to spot you. She let out a laugh, “How was the head, Soonyoung?” She had no shame.

You felt your cheeks heat up in embarrassment, turning away to hide in Soonyoung’s chest while he hugged you, and you groaned. “It was great, thanks.” He had no shame, too. You could actually hear his smirk. You sometimes wondered how you managed to get yourself a boyfriend who was the male version of one of your best friends.

Doki looked at you in disgust, “You really fucked in my bathroom?”

“Yes,” he stated, simply. You were still hiding. Doki and Krys would never leave you alone for this.

“I better not find cum anywhere,” they said, tone serious and a huff escaping their lips.

Soonyoung had a cheeky grin on his face, “You won’t.” He thought about it for a second, “She cleaned up good.”

“Soonyoung!”

It was Thursday, which meant you’d most likely see Soonyoung once you were done with work. On Fridays, you started later, and he had no morning classes, so you usually could sleep curled up together, either at his place or yours.

Not a lot had happened since Christmas. Soonyoung was still annoying. And he was still your boyfriend. The two of you spent New Years together with your friends in Tokyo. That was the first time you took an actual trip together.

You could hear fireworks already exploding in the background. You could hear them in your heart, too. Soonyoung’s arms were wrapped around your waist, while your fingers were laced by his nape.

You were always very comfortable around him, but when he looked at you like that, your breathing picked up the pace. Almost as if the surrounding air wasn’t enough.

Ten.

“I can’t believe I found you,” he said, lips in your favorite smile.

Nine.

You giggled, “Me neither. I can’t believe the most annoying man on the planet made his way to me.”

Eight.

Soonyoung pinched your sides lightly, “Don’t say that.” His lips formed a pout.

Seven.

“I’m just kidding,” you said, a chuckle escaping you. “I’m glad you found me, too.” You stared at him for a moment, “Can I tell you something?”

Six.

He nodded, “Anything.”

Five.

“You make me feel like I’m really, really loved.” Sometimes you had a hard time vocalizing everything Soonyoung placed in your heart. But, if you thought enough about it, it all came down to four little letters put together.

Four.

The man lit up like a beam. “That’s because you are.”

Three.

You smiled back, “I know. I hope you know you are, too.”

Two.

“I know.”

One.

“I really love you.”

Zero.

“I really love you, too.”

Soonyoung earned himself a drawer at your place. He was getting tired of carrying his clothes around. He gave you a frame with a picture of the two of you, one from Christmas. That one was for your office. You also met his family, which was kind of an event.

“So you’re going to Namyangju this weekend?” Jihoon asked over a beer. The four of you were having dinner and catching up as you haven’t seen Soonyoung’s flatmates in about two weeks. That was considerably a long time. For some reason, your boyfriend was spending a lot more time in your place than his.

You nodded, “Yeah, on Saturday.”

Seungkwan smiled at you, “Nervous?”

Soonyoung’s ears perked up, focusing on your response rather than on the fried chicken in front of him. You let out a breath, “A bit? I mean, it’s natural.”

He smiled at you, “There’s nothing to be nervous about. They’ll love you.”

Jihoon agreed, “His parents are amazing. I bet you’ll come home with so much food packed.”

“You know,” the youngest spoke up, “I’ve lived with him for three years, and you’re the first girlfriend I've seen him take home.”

“And the first one we really like and hang out with,” Jihoon added.

Soonyoung’s cheeks blushed in embarrassment, “Shut up.” He had a couple relationships here and there. Most of them weren’t even serious, anyway. Perhaps two, three actual girlfriends, but none of them staying around long enough for him to have the wish of introducing them to the most important people in his life.

He went on a lot of dates, but never really succeeding on finding someone that suited him, someone that kept up with his sense of humor, but that could also pull the reins when needed. Someone that he felt naturally comfortable around, that made him laugh and kept him on his toes. None of the girls he shared a first kiss with had given him the same feeling he got when his lips first touched yours. Sparks all over. And he still felt that way.

You looked at him, a smile on your face. For some reason, the part about Soonyoung never introducing anyone else to his parents made you slightly more nervous. So much pressure on you. That kinda had to mean something, didn’t it? It was good, though. It made your heart tingly. “That’s cute.”

Soonyoung had texted you around lunch saying his latest class would finish up earlier than usual, telling you to stop by the school when you were done with work, so you could head home together. You told him you’d be there.

It was six now. You were on the elevator heading up to Soonyoung’s studio. You loved the studio. You had been there before, being well familiar with how it looked like. Still, you liked to look around whenever you went back. There were big mirrors against one wall and a couple of ballet bars. The sides were made of exposed bricks, giving the room an industrial feel.

Watching Soonyoung dance was always very exciting. There was something about the way he looked whenever he was in his element that made your heart beat in your ears. It was always something that had a big effect on you. Some specific moments, though, more than others. Like when he was practicing in a crop top, his abdomen slightly showing, and he looked at you through the mirror. That wasn’t the only nor the biggest reason why you liked to watch him dance, but it was for sure a good motivator for your visits.

Since he mentioned the class would be over by this time, you stepped foot into the room without much thinking. Big mistake.

There were about eight, nine children, all scattered across the wooden floor. They seemed to be around four years old. Several parents were sitting by the benches placed against the wall. Did he lie about his class ending up earlier? Typical.

When you walked in, his eyes caught yours immediately, you freezing in your tracks. Soonyoung clapped and smiled, you furrowed your eyebrows at him. “Class, I want to introduce you to someone.”

Your eyes went wide. He would not do this. He wouldn’t dare. You mouthed him a ‘no’, but obviously, he didn’t listen. Your boyfriend pointed at you, and heads started turning your way. The children looked curious, the parents looked unamused.

“That’s Mrs. Kwon.” Big commotion. You heard some ‘ohs’ and some random yelling. You were going to kill him. “Come here, baby,” he said, reaching his hand out to you.

Soonyoung was fucking unbelievable. They were children, you had no choice but to play along, and he knew that. His lips were curved in a teasing smile, and you felt like throwing a punch. Once you were by his side, his arm went to your waist, keeping you close to him.

“She’s so pretty, Mr. Kwon,” a girl with piggy-tails and pink sweats told him.

Your skin started burning again in embarrassment. You looked down at her, “Thank you, honey. You’re prettier, though.” She smiled at you and, suddenly, you weren’t that mad anymore.

A little boy stood up. He looked like Soonyoung when he was younger, the memory of his baby pictures still fresh. He offered you his small hand, “I’m Dohyun. I’m four and a half and I love to dance.” You remembered Soonyoung mentioning him before when he was talking about “his kids”. Apparently, they were very similar, and he said the kid had a future in dancing. He saw it already. Even though Soonyoung didn’t mention, you knew that this was his favorite student.

You giggled, squatting down to meet his eyes and shake his hand. “Nice to meet you, Dohyun.”

“Are you married?” Another girl asked this time. She was sitting down and wearing a ballerina skirt.

You shook your head, lips forming a gentle smile. “No, we’re not.”

“Yet,” Soonyoung added while you stood up.

Before you could say anything else, she spoke again. “Kiss her, Mr. Kwon!”

“I don’t think—”

“Okay.” And then you felt his mouth on yours. It was short and sweet and loving.

The kids started cheering, and you heard some adults laughing in the back. He pulled back soon enough and smiled at you, cheeks slightly painted in red.

“Can she dance?” Dohyun asked.

Soonyoung nodded, “Mrs. Kwon is actually a pretty good dancer. I bet if you ask nicely she can give a little show.” Your sneaky wrapped your arm around his middle and pinched his waist. He showed no reaction.

You pursed your lips, “You know what, kids? I kinda hurt my feet at work.” They whined. “So I can’t really dance today. But I’ll come back again and take Mr. Kwon’s class with you, ok?” You offered them a smile.

They seemed pretty happy at the response, hands thrown in the air and voices loud in tiny screams. You took advantage of the diversion to lean in close to Soonyoung’s ear. “I’ll kill you when we’re home.”

He shot you a smile, “Love you, too.”

Once things were calmer again, you told the children you’d let their teacher finish the class and that you’d see them soon. Dohyun offered you another handshake. Yeah, he seemed to have a lot in common with your boyfriend.

You sat beside one of the moms, who gave you a kind smile and went back into focusing on her daughter. Your attention went to Soonyoung. The way his arms moved and how his voice got softer while speaking to the kids. He had a glow in his eyes that was not unfamiliar to you. That was the way he looked at you before whispering an ‘I love you’.

Soonyoung was spending a lot of time in the studio lately. He had taken on new choreography classes and two or three private classes besides his usual workload. He still made sure to take some time to see you, though. Even if he was busy, even if he, theoretically, had no time, he still came to you.

Yet, there was something you were overthinking. One of his new private students, Areum, made you feel insecure for some reason. He had shown you some videos of them dancing together, his intention being nothing but share his passion with you. Still, your eyes lingered on her longer than they should. She was beautiful, like her name indicated, and around his age. Tall, slim, long, blonde hair framing her delicate features perfectly. She was good, too. She seemed to move effortlessly around Soonyoung.

He didn’t talk about her. He did talk about his classes, but not about her. He didn’t call her beautiful. He didn’t say she was funny. He didn’t say they had a lot in common. None of that. Still, you thought about it. You thought about Soonyoung leaving you for her. Someone prettier, more fitting for him. You cried about it, too. Late at night, on the days he wasn’t sleeping beside you. When you looked into the mirror, you wished you saw someone like her. Not someone like you.

You did your best not to let it show. There was no reason for you to feel like that. You knew Soonyoung loved you. He made sure you were certain of that. And you knew you were doing nothing more than projecting your thoughts into him, going to therapy for long enough to recognize your behavioral patterns. Still, it seemed like you couldn’t abandon the thoughts. You tried, you really did. But there was this little voice there, whenever you knew he was at the studio with her, that made sure to repeat that he was about to fall out of love with you and in love with her at any second.

It was Saturday, Soonyoung coming over after another class with Areum in the afternoon. Surprisingly enough, he enjoyed domestic dates quite a lot. The two of you still went out sometimes. You went to movies, bars, bowling. But he liked the most when he could curl up against you in a bed, feeling your head resting against his chest. Especially now, considering the cold weather. He was sure you noticed how his heart beat faster when he was by your side.

He went straight to the bathroom for a quick shower, giving your lips a small peck before making his way through the apartment that felt like home to him. When he came back, wearing nothing but gray sweats, he caught you staring at the mirror by your door. You had a frown on your face. He had seen this before. “Whatcha doing?”

You shook your head, “Nothing.” You looked like a child that got caught doing something they’re not supposed to.

He closed the door behind him and moved towards you, arms resting by your waist and head nestled against your shoulder. “Doesn’t look like nothing to me.”

You laughed, trying to make the conversation lighter. “What does it look like to you?”

“Like you’re bothered about something.” He looked at you through the reflection, tone gentle. “More specifically, about how you look.”

Ever since you started dating Soonyoung, being insecure about your appearance became less frequent. He had this gift of making you feel desired and sexy and beautiful without even trying. It was like he couldn’t go a day without reminding you that, for him, there was no one that would ever compare to you. But, still, you were only human. You had tough days, too.

You bit the insides of your cheek, “Do you think Areum is pretty?”

Soonyoung furrowed his brows, “What?”

You got scared to repeat it, almost realizing how stupid of a questioning it was as soon as it passed your lips. So you decided to apologize instead. “I’m sorry.”

“You’re feeling down over Areum?” He whispered by your ear.

You sighed, “I don’t know.” You closed your eyes in distress, “I just think she’s really pretty, and I don’t look anything like her. And. Urgh. Nevermind.”

He pulled you even closer to him, “No. Don’t do that. You can tell me.”

“I’m just, I don’t know, scared you’ll realize she’s better looking and has probably a lot more common with you and break up with me and start dating her,” you confessed, voice low.

Soonyoung let out a breath, “Can you open your eyes for a second?” When you did, you were greeted by the warm smile that he had on. “What do you see?”

“Us?” You tried.

He laughed softly, “Yes. But I mean, what do you see when you look at you?”

You licked your lips, “Today’s not a good day to ask me that.”

“Okay,” Soonyoung said. “Then you wanna know what I see?”

“Are you about to be cheesy?”

He smiled, eyes shaped in crescents. “Absolutely yes.” You let out another small laugh. When you didn’t respond, he kept on speaking. ��I see the most beautiful woman that has ever laid foot on this planet.”

You shook your head, “Can you not say that?”

“It’s the truth, though.” Soonyoung’s grip got tighter. “You are the most beautiful woman in the world to me.” You pouted and he continued. “There’s so much I love about you and so many things that are just, I don’t know, breathtaking. I can go on for hours about it.”

“You don’t have t—”

“I love your body. Every single bit of it. Your arms, your waist, your hands, your tummy, your breasts.” His voice was soft, delicate. But still firm, as if he was leaving no space for any questioning. “I love your thighs. Fuck, I really love them. And your ass. You have the best ass.” You couldn’t hold back a giggle. “I love your eyes, too. And your nose. And the way you scrunch it when I kiss it. But you know what’s one of my favorite things?”

You stared at him, “What?”

“Your smile,” he said, kissing your cheek. “You have the most amazing smile and every time I see it I get dizzy and my heart feels funny and warm. I’ve loved it ever since I first saw it.”

You felt tears starting to form by the corner of your eye and Soonyoung looked at you fondly. “I don’t care about how Areum looks. I don’t care about Areum at all.” Honestly, you knew he didn’t. “I don’t care about anyone else but you. You’re everything I need. If I say you’re the most amazing, beautiful, sexy woman I have ever seen, then you are.”

He gently turned you around, hands now moving to cup your face. He held you like you were the most precious of objects, like the smallest of touches would be enough to break you. “You are so, so beautiful. And I wish you could see what I see because, if you did, you would never, ever doubt it.”

You let out a breath, lips faintly forming a smile. “Thank you.”

“I won’t ever get tired from looking at you because I think you’re fascinating.” Soonyoung leaned in, placing a small peck by your lips. “I love you and I don’t want to see you compare yourself to others. Because, in my heart, there’s no competition. It’s you, you’re it. And that’s all that matters.”

“Even if Areum is prettier than me?” You sounded unsure. As if you didn’t have every single reason to believe him.

“She’s not prettier than you.” Your lips formed a pout again. “Baby, she’s not.”

You sighed, “Okay.” You wanted to believe him. Maybe you’d start soon. You felt calmer, though. At least for a little. Soonyoung noticed and seemed to relax slightly, too.

“If I have to tell you that every day, I will.” He smiled down at you, “If I have to tell you over,” Soonyoung leaned in, gently kissing your lips, “and over,” another kiss, “and over,” another, “and over again, I will.”

You brushed the hair out of his face, “Okay.” You sounded better than the previous time. Soonyoung had always made you feel special. That would be enough.

A teasing smile formed by his lips. “I can show you, too.”

“Are you really offering to fuck me while I’m recovering from a breakdown?” You laughed, shaking your head.

Soonyoung nodded, “It’s called sex therapy.”

“I have something for you,” you told Soonyoung while the two of you settled in the hotel bed. It was the weekend for Valentine’s Day. Theoretically, it was past midnight, so it was the fourteenth already.

You once told him you had never been skiing. It was on one of your first dates. You still haven’t tried it, so he decided to take you to a ski resort for Valentine’s. Both of you kinda sucked at it, but you still had fun. You were still sore from both the skiing and your further activities, body begging for some sleep.

“Oh? Is it you?” He asked with a smile.

You laughed, “No, stupid.” Soonyoung pouted, looking up at you. He was sitting by the mattress while you moved to grab his gift by your suitcase. “Two things, actually.”

You sat by his side, handing him a small box of chocolate first. He giggled, “Following the Korean tradition, I see.”

“Yes, so I expect you to give me chocolate on White Day as well,” you said, a laugh passing your lips.

He kissed your cheek, “You got it.”

Soonyoung looked at you and waited until you looked at him, too. “What?”

“Does this mean you’re asking me to be your valentine?”

Your eyes went to the back of your head, “Soonyoung, we’ve been dating for about five months. And I think you’ve been my valentine pretty much since the day we met.”

A smile showed up on his face. One of your favorite things about when he smiled was the way his eyes almost disappeared. He looked particularly adorable like that. “You’re not asking, but the answer is yes, I’ll be your valentine.” You rolled your eyes again. Soonyoung stared at your hands and saw another package in them. “What about that one?”

“Can you please be patient?” You said, with a huff.

He shook his head, “Not really, no.” The way he obviously took pride in that was almost unbearable. He was lucky you loved him.

You placed the gift in his hands, lips curving in a smile, “Happy Valentine’s Day.”

He immediately reached for the insides of the bag, hands pulling back the tiger-print scarf you chose as a present. “Is this—”

Your head moved in a nod, “Yeah. I know you’ve been wanting this one for a while.”

He squinted his eyes at you, “Is this why you didn’t let me buy it that day when they were having the sale?”

“Yeah,” you laughed. “I bought it like the day before. You would’ve ruined everything.” It wasn’t a cheap scarf. Yves Saint Laurent wasn’t a cheap brand. Soonyoung had been checking the piece for some time now, almost purchasing it when he saw the 40% discount on the website a couple of weeks ago. You bugged him not to do it, saying that it would not match his clothes, that spring was right around the corner, so there was no need for another scarf at that point, that he had a similar one already. He seemed convinced, because he dropped the laptop and went to rest his head on your lap.

He pouted, “Why did you spend so much money on this, though?”

You stood up, positioning yourself between his legs. You took the soft fabric from his hands, putting it carefully around his neck. “You can just say thank you and that I’m the best girlfriend ever.”

Soonyoung looked up at you, adoration very clear in his eyes. “I love it, thank you.”

You fixed the scarf a little and, once you were satisfied, you leaned in, placing a kiss by his lips. “You’re welcome.”

“Wait, I wanna see how it looks.” Soonyoung stood up, feet quickly moving against the bedroom floor and leading him towards the bathroom. “Damn, I look so good,” he said, voice laced with confidence.

You giggled, “You do.”

“I totally get why you love me. I mean, how could you not?” When you didn’t respond, he kept speaking, still from the other room. “I give you great sex, I look hot, and I’m super nice. You’re so lucky.” Theoretically, he wasn’t lying. But when you saw him by the doorway, body resting against it, you still gave him a look. He had a smirk on his features now, “Does this mean you’re accepting my tiger agenda?”

“Absolutely not.”

“Fuck, Soonyoung,” you said, breathing erratic. Your nails were digging through his lower back, and you were pretty sure he’d have marks in a couple of hours. He didn’t mind, though. He liked it, actually. It made him feel yours.

His arms were by the sides of your head, palms against the mattress to keep himself up. The muscles on his back were tensed up, making him look even more enticing. His hair was slightly stuck to his forehead, droplets of sweats making him glow. Soonyoung was hypnotizing. “I think I’m gonna cum this time.”

You let out a moan when he hit just the right spot. “Finally.” He had edged himself about three times now. Or was it four? You didn’t even know. Whenever he was close and thought it was too early - and anything below two hours was considered too early in his dictionary - he edged and moved on to something else. This meant you ended up cumming multiple times, because whenever he was trying to calm himself down, he was all over you.

Sometimes, he ate you out until your legs were shaking. He kissed you, fingers buried deep inside you. He sucked on your breasts, teasingly biting down on your nipples. He denied you a couple of orgasms, too. That was, according to him, a way to train you to keep up with him and his unrealistic stamina. That’s why you were always dead tired after having sex with Soonyoung.

He let out a laugh, “Four times is enough for today.” Oh, so it was four. “This pussy is too good, can’t hold out anymore.”

The way Soonyoung moved his hips never failed to make your head spin. He usually started off rougher, needier. But when he decided he’d cum, he ironically slowed things down. His thrusts got deeper, but never sloppier. Maybe just a little when he was in his final ones. You had never been fucked like this and, honestly, you didn’t know how he managed.

“How many times did you cum today?” He asked, bottoming out, and staying like that while he stared at you. His lip was trapped between his teeth and his gaze would be enough to put you on a trance.

You wrapped your legs around his body, “No fucking idea.” You scratched his skin lightly, “But if you’re a good boyfriend, you’ll keep moving and make me cum again.”

He smiled at you and your heart skipped a beat. “Can you take it?”

“Yeah,” you said, nodding your head. “Please.”

Soonyoung moved closer, forearms now being the ones holding his weight. His chest was pressed against yours. It felt hot, like the slightest touch of his skin was enough to start a fire at the pit of your stomach. “You deserve it, don’t you? You lasted so long today. Such a good girl.” His lips then found your neck. ��No work tomorrow, right?” You confirmed with a low hum. “Great.” He sucked on the skin hard enough to leave purple constellations all over.

“Can you please move?” You begged. You were way too sensitive now, but knowing he was about to cum made you want to push yourself a bit more. For him.

He laughed, breath fanning against your skin and awakening goosebumps all over. You felt his tongue licking its way down, lips by your chest now. “You taste so good.” Once he was satisfied by all the work he did there, placing some more marks, he pulled back, eyes on yours once again.

Soonyoung offered you a smile and started to finally move. The noises that filled the room were so damn dirty you’d probably be embarrassed if you weren’t alone. Your hands danced around his back, moans escaping you every time his hips came in contact with yours. He moved like ocean waves.

“You’re so fucking wet,” he said, lips finding yours. He wasn’t exactly kissing you, just trying to swallow your whimpers instead. “You keep pushing me out.”

“It’s because it feels too good.”

Soonyoung chuckled smugly. He knew he was good, but the confirmation he got whenever you said it took him over the moon. He picked up the pace and felt you clench around him. “Looks like someone’s getting close.”

You nodded, swallowing dry. “Please, I need you to make me cum again.” When you were this sensitive, you didn’t even need any extra stimulation. Soonyoung inside you and hitting all the right places every single time was more than enough.

“I will.” He pulled back, resting on his palms once again, so he could move more freely. You closed your eyes, mind too caught up in all the sensations that were washing over you. “You look so pretty like that.” A laugh passed your lips, and Soonyoung wondered how he could feel something so warm in the middle of such a filthy scenario.

He kept thrusting into you, and you were oh so close to seeing stars. Your thoughts were clouded and the only thing on your brain was Soonyoung. He was inside you in every possible way. “Baby, I’m so close.”

You squeezed around him once again, and he groaned in response. “I’ll never get enough of you.”

You whined as he pulled out, only to slam back in slightly harder every time. Your body moved up and down from his ministrations, breasts bouncing in front of his eyes. You were fucking addictive, he thought.

“Right there, shit.” You were almost there. You could feel it, and Soonyoung could, too, from how tight you were.

“Are you gonna cum for me again? Cum all over my cock?” His voice was barely a whisper, almost getting lost between the moans you were letting and the slick noises that came from your body.

You nodded vehemently, “Yes. Fuck, yes.”

Soonyoung laughed, very satisfied with the reaction he was getting from you. He picked up the pace, but still making sure he wasn’t as rough as he was earlier on, well aware of the fact that you were tired by now. “Let go,” he said, gently. “I got you.”

He snapped his hips a couple more times, and you felt your high wash over you. Your legs were shaking against him, lips parted as his name escaped you over and over again. He didn’t stop, though, chasing his own orgasm now and helping you with riding yours out.

“Baby?” You called out, voice shaky and hands moving to push his hair away from his eyes. He hummed in acknowledgement, too busy to actually say something. “I need you to cum inside me.” Your tone was innocent, as if you didn’t know the effect your words had on him.

“Fuck,” he muttered. “You know how this drives me crazy.” You were going to be the death of him.

You laughed, breath still erratic and body oversensitive. “I need you to fill me up. Please. Please.” You knew just the way to coax him.

Soonyoung let out a groan, his movements getting almost imperceptibly messy. “I’m gonna cum.”

“Please.”

He was done. You felt him releasing inside you and nothing would ever compare. Soonyoung moaned and cursed and kept on fucking you until you were begging him to stop, body starting to hurt from overstimulation. He leaned in once again, capturing your lips in a slow kiss.

“You’re literally going to make me lose it one day,” he said, between giggles.

You rubbed his back gently, “That’s the point, isn’t it?”

He placed kisses everywhere now. Your cheeks, your jaw, your neck. “You’re getting better at keeping up with me,” he teased between pecks.

“Better? Are you kidding me? We literally fucked for,” you stared at the clock by your nightstand, “three and a half hours.”

“I had another one in me.”

Soonyoung was unbelievable. A lunatic. “You’re insane.”

He pulled back to look at you once again, lips curved in a smile. “Don’t worry, we’ll get you to four real soon.”

“I think his solo is coming up soon,” Chan said. He was sitting by your side, excitement very clear in his features.

Soonyoung wasn’t much of a public performer, building his career mostly behind the scenes, with choreography, or with teaching. So you usually had to settle for watching him dance at the studio, whenever he allowed. When he was choreographing, he didn’t really like to have anyone around. He was too focused. He needed to have a clear head, so he preferred to be alone. You obviously respected that, and it made you cherish even more the moments he actually invited you over to the studio to watch him.

The dance school was having a festival to showcase its students. Some teachers were performing as well, in the breaks between the bigger performances. They were short, small little pieces just to keep the crowd occupied while the next act got ready. Still, you were beyond excited to finally see Soonyoung on a big stage, like he deserved.

His kids had performed not long ago, and you caught a couple glimpses of him by the side of the stage, dancing along and helping his students whenever they couldn’t remember something. Dohyun for sure stood out among all the other children, and you could clearly see why Soonyoung said he had it in him.

When you looked closely into your boyfriend’s expression, you saw something in his eyes you hadn’t really seen before. It was happiness, but it had something else to it. Passion, but, most importantly, pride. He looked like someone who had just accomplished something great. And, in fact, he had.

You knew he felt differently about teaching, for example, adult private classes, like Areum, than how he felt for teaching kids. When he was dealing with them, he felt more responsible. More aware and more important. So it was only fair he got most of his validation from watching them on stage.

A lot of people came to watch Soonyoung. He tried to brush everything off, saying he would dance for barely two minutes. It wasn’t about feeling nervous or not being confident. Soonyoung wasn’t like that. It was just about him thinking it wasn’t that big of a deal. Maybe he was too used to being in the background that he kinda forgot the thrill and the importance of being on a stage for someone like him. Despite his efforts, no one listened to him, much like all of you did on a daily basis.

You were sitting between Chan, who was previously his student and currently his personal friend and a teacher in a different school, and Jihoon, the latter being responsible for the music Soonyoung was going to dance to. One day, while they were hanging out in Jihoon’s music studio, he showed Soonyoung some samples, and he liked that particular one very much, his upcoming performance coming to mind immediately. The youngest made some adjustments and, not long after, Soonyoung had everything set. Seungkwan, Doki, Joshua, Krys and Seokmin came, too. All sitting close and almost as excited as you were.

A man showed up in front of the velvet red curtains. The school had rented a beautiful theater, their budget coming from being a very prestigious and important institution. When he announced Soonyoung’s name, your heart immediately skipped a beat.

The first couple of notes of the music were played by a piano, the sound filling up your ears immediately. Soonyoung was wearing black dress pants and a white, long sleeved shirt. It had a bow on his neck, and it made him look like he belonged in a painting. He also had a red scarf hanging by his pants, and you guessed it would be a part of his number.

When the spotlight hit him, you felt tears forming at your eyes. You had learned how to recognize the several shapes love could take through the years. You had learned how to recognize you were in love, too. A big part of it for you was being immersed into the other person’s passion. It was this idea of being able to hear them talk about or just watch them do something they enjoy for hours, even if it isn’t what you particularly like or understand.

You had no actual knowledge on dance. Still, you loved to watch Soonyoung dance. You loved to hear him talk about new choreographies he’s creating. But now, watching him perform in front of several other people, with a glow around him that could only be described as magical, it was like this new part of your heart had just opened up. A part saved for Soonyoung only, for him and the way you felt about him at that particular instant.

When he started moving, you swore you had never seen anything as beautiful. You had seen him dance before, more than once. But it was different now. It felt different. He didn’t miss a single beat. You always hear and read about people who are born to do certain things and, when they find that path, they go above and beyond. They exceed and they shine brighter than the sun. That was Soonyoung at that moment. It was like everything revolved around him, like he was the only thing that mattered. And, to you, it was. You thought that, at some point, Jihoon murmured something to you, but you didn’t actually hear a thing. You had tunnel vision, attention solemnly focused on the man on the stage.

It didn’t last long, you then realizing he wasn’t actually lying when he said he would barely be on stage for two minutes. Still, while you watched him, it was like time was moving slower. Yet, not all the hours in the world would be sufficient for something as great as this. You weren’t sure if it was the music, which gave you a sense of longing, the way he danced, which gave you literal chills, or just him, which gave you all the love you needed, but when he walked to the back of the stage, ending his performance, you felt a tear hit your cheek.

You let out a small chuckle when you realized you were actually crying. You tried to understand everything you were feeling at that moment, but words seemed to escape you when you needed them the most. Actually, thinking about it, they weren’t really necessary there.

Once the curtain closed, Chan turned to you. He was smiling, but when he realized you had tears on your face, he frowned. “Are you ok?”

You giggled, index finger wiping your face gently. “I’m fine.” A sigh escaped you, “It’s just the first time I actually see him on a stage.”

“Oh.” He laughed, having a better understanding of what was going on. “Yeah, he’s amazing.”

You nodded, “He really is.”

When everything was done, you sent half the people to your place to set things up while the rest of you waited for Soonyoung to leave. You were sitting by one of the benches close to the backstage door alongside Jihoon, Seungkwan and Chan. A lot of people came out before him, your legs bouncing faster every time the door opened, and he was not the one that turned the knob.

When he finally showed up, you stood up quickly and launched yourself into his arms. He laughed at your sudden display of affection, arms reaching for your waist. “Wow, isn’t this a nice surprise?”

You held him tight, heart beating in your ears. “That was breathtaking.”

Soonyoung giggled, “It barely lasted—”

“I don’t care,” you said, kissing his cheek over and over again. “It was probably the most beautiful thing I have ever seen.”

“She even cried,” Chan said, voice low.

Seungkwan elbowed him, “Shut up, they’re having a moment.”

“Did you really?” He asked you, eyes focused on yours. Cute, he thought.

Your lips formed a pout, “Yeah.” You gave his lips a quick peck.

Soonyoung raised an eyebrow at you, “But you’ve seen me dance before.” He was just genuinely confused because, for him, that was truly, nothing special.

“I know,” you nodded. The rules were the same. It was just a different game made for you to tell him how you felt. “But it was the first time I saw you dancing on an actual stage. You looked so different. It was like you had magic all over your body.” Soonyoung smiled, teeth showing slightly. “You were born for this, and it’s just so amazing to see it.”

His grip on your waist got stronger, “Thanks, babe.”

You pulled back a little, hands moving to cup his cheek. “I’m really proud of you.”

Soonyoung was a funny person. He was confident. Perhaps even too confident, sometimes. Still, he craved some sort of validation, much like every single human on the planet. He was often too shy to ask, fishing for it in the form of compliments to others. Yet, most of the time, he didn’t even need to do that with you. You knew exactly what to tell him and when to tell him. It came with love, he guessed.

His chest got warm at your words. “Thank you.”

“I’m not saying this because I’m your girlfriend, but I really have never seen someone as incredible as you. That’s where you belong, on the stage, under spotlights.” You offered him a tender smile. “I know you usually go for behind the scenes, but I think you should do this more often. I loved seeing you up there, and I love you.” You brushed the hair out of his face, continuing to speak when he didn’t respond. “Whatever you want to do, I’ll be by your side. But I really think you should consider performing more.”

“If I performed every week, would you come see me every time?” There was a hint of teasing in his voice, as if he was trying to test you. Stupid, stupid, Soonyoung.

You nodded with no hesitation, “Every time.”

He giggled, “Damn, I think you really love me.”

You laughed, too. Head moving in another nod. “Damn, I think I really do.”

“Is this the last one?” You asked, placing the box by the kitchen floor. Soonyoung was taking the heavier ones and, according to him, putting up his gym hours to use.

He nodded, dropping another one by the counter. “I think so, yes.”

Soonyoung was moving in. Honestly speaking, you saw it coming. When Krys and Seokmin finally started dating a couple of months ago, you figured it was only a matter of time until they decided to live together. Especially as Krys complained almost every day about not waking up next to him, and even more if Soonyoung stayed over.

“Morning,” you told Krys when she came out of her bedroom. Soonyoung was sitting by one of the kitchen stalls while you made eggs for breakfast.

“How is this a good morning?” She said, voice grumpy.

Soonyoung laughed, “Oh, wow. Someone’s in a mood.”

A huff passed her lips while you stared with a confused expression. “How can this be a good morning if I didn’t wake up to Seokmin right next to me?”

You sighed, a chuckle passing your lips. “Here we go again.”

“I just don’t think it’s fucking fair!” Krys said, sitting down next to Soonyoung. “You wake up next to tiger boy almost every day.”

“Can you not call him that?”

She took a mug and poured herself some coffee, “Meanwhile, I can only see my goddam boyfriend in the morning on weekends.”

“I just don’t get why the two of you haven’t moved in together yet,” Soonyoung pointed out, taking a sip of his drink.

“Because he hasn’t asked me to!”

Thankfully, Seokmin suggested that they moved in a couple of days after. If Krys asked, you’d deny, but you convinced Soonyoung to have a talk with him. Especially as you were well aware of the fact that he wanted to do it, but was just scared he was moving too fast for your friend. But, considering their dynamic, two months were more like two years. So the timing was just about right.

“So what are you going to do now that she’s moving out?” Soonyoung asked, grabbing the popcorn from the bowl by your lap.

You furrowed your eyebrows, “What do you mean?”

He shrugged, “Who’s gonna move in? Do you have anyone in mind?”

Was he serious? Or was he just making fun of you? Either way, you decided to play along. “Yeah, I’m thinking of this one dude.”

“W-what dude?”

“Just this one guy. He’s a dancer and I heard he has a great stroke game.” You drank a bit of your soda, attention glued to the TV.

You felt Soonyoung’s gaze on you. You paid him no mind. If you had turned to him, you’d actually be able to see gears spinning in his head. He squinted his eyes at you, “Wait. You’re talking about me, right?”

“No?” You did your best to sound genuine.

Soonyoung bit the insides of his cheek. He was not jealous. He wasn’t a jealous person. But he just had an idea that, when Krys moved out, he’d be the one moving in. You didn’t know, but he had plans for the spare room already. He’d put all his tiger stuffies there, bring in some shelves, maybe some dancing stuff, too. He’d probably have some work to do with convincing you on some tiger printed decorations, but he’d manage. He hoped. So now, actually discussing it with you and getting a different response threw him off.

“Where did you meet him?” He thought about it for a moment. “Do I know him?”

You took some popcorn on your mouth and chewed slowly, working hard to stretch Soonyoung’s agony. “Through Doki,” you said, after some time.

“Do I know him?” He asked again. He just hoped he wasn’t sounding too dumb. He still felt you were talking about him, though. It had to be.

“I think so,” your shoulders moved in a shrug. Playing with him was turning out easier than you thought.

Soonyoung tilted his head, clearly still very confused. “Does he have a girlfriend?”

You nodded, “Yeah. Doki says she’s a saint because he’s pretty annoying.”

He hummed, “And where did Doki meet him?” He tried to think of all your friends, all of Doki’s friends. Nothing. Who even was this guy?

“Through Josh.”

Okay, you were talking about him. It had to be. Still, he wasn’t totally sure. There was still this tiny piece of his heart that was scared you weren’t. “Baby?” You hummed in acknowledgment. “Are you talking about me?”

You could’ve gone further. Really. Made up a lot of other things. But when you looked at him, his lips curved in a pout and eyes clearly distressed, you felt bad. You sighed, a laugh passing your lips. “What do you think?”

“I don’t know,” Soonyoung whined. You did nothing but stare at him. You had this one face you gave him often. You know, when the person you love says something so stupid that you really want to keep a straight face, but you’re so endeared you can’t actually do it? So you have this half smile, filled with cherish and adoration, but still reflecting their stupidity. That’s the look you had on. He furrowed his eyebrows once again, doing his best to decipher you. Oh. Soonyoung smiled widely at the realization, “Are you asking me to move in with you?”

You moved your body to face his, “What do you think?” You repeated, a cheeky grin on your face.

“The answer’s yes.”

Krys and Seokmin started apartment hunting the next week, and, lucky enough, due to her connections, they found a great place for a great price. It wasn’t far from you and Doki, nor from Seokmin’s school. She settled for moving out on the first week of June to have time to figure everything out.

So, now that the time finally came, your place was filled with boxes and missing some pieces of furniture. You were excited, though. It wasn’t like you didn’t know what it was like to spend most of your free time in Soonyoung’s company. He had been hanging around a lot, and you were pretty sure this is part of why Krys was so on the edge about not seeing Seokmin as much as she’d like. Between her streams and his teaching schedule, they ended up seeing each other basically only on weekends. So when she woke up and had to see you and your boyfriend having breakfast together almost every day, she got impatient, wanting that for her as well.

Everything turned out fine, anyway. Soonyoung was getting tired of commuting and of still having to bring just some clothes around. The drawer he earned himself after Christmas offered too little space compared to the amount of time he spent there. He also found a really great guy to take his current spot with Jihoon and Seungkwan. Vernon was one of his closest friends, the two of them meeting him back in college when the music production and the dance majors had to work in a project together. So the day Vernon texted him saying he really wanted to move out of his current apartment, it was like the stars were aligning to make everything work out as it should.

Soonyoung left most of his furniture back, bringing his closet and some other things, like his desk and his chair. He didn’t really use them, but as Vernon had his own, he decided to take it with him. You had moved your office set to the spare room, placing Soonyoung’s closet back in the bedroom that the two of you would share now.

You were standing by the doorway of the empty room, and a part of you missed Krys already. At first, you barely came into her room, claiming it was too colorful, too much. Whenever you said that, she rolled her eyes and hushed you away, saying you didn’t have to stay there. Later on, you got used to it, thinking it very much suited her. So now, seeing the back wall without her big rainbow wallpaper, it made your heart slightly ache. You had gone through this with Doki already, and it amused you how you were the one that never really moved away. That place had always felt like home, anyway.

“What are we going to do with this room, huh?” Soonyoung asked, arms wrapping around your waist. His chin rested by your shoulder, skin warm against yours. It was hot now, the June weather opening up to the gates to the much expected summer.

“Don’t really know,” you confessed. For the other two couples, figuring out what to do with spare bedrooms was easy, both of them settling for editing and streaming purposes. You and Soonyoung didn’t really have anything like that, but the place seemed empty with just your respective laptops, desks and chairs.

He pulled you close. You usually hated touches around summer, being way too bothered by your own body and sweat. But, with Soonyoung, you found out you secretly didn’t mind. “I have an idea.”

Whenever he said that, you immediately rolled your eyes. Especially because you knew something you probably wouldn’t like would end up leaving his lips. You sighed, “What?”

He laughed, chest moving against your back. “We can get a shelf, put it here,” one of his arms left your body to point at the wall by your side, “and then place my tiger stuffies on it.” You could hear the smile on his voice.

You were a strong advocate against Soonyoung’s tiger agenda, thinking he went very, very overboard with it. To be fair, he went overboard with a lot of things. But this one was, by far, the worst. Still, the stuffies were some of the most bearable parts. So you weren’t really that opposed to the idea of them being on a shelf in the spare room. At least they wouldn’t be in your bedroom. Soonyoung often turned them away whenever the two of you had sex, so them being in a different part of the house would save you the trouble.

You shrugged, “That’s not the worst thing you’ve ever suggested.” Your tone was filled with tease.

“Oh!” Soonyoung was genuinely surprised. He expected a lot more resistance. “Great, then.” You laughed at his reaction. “We can go to IKEA tomorrow.”

You loved going to IKEA. “We can.”

“You know what else we should buy?” You hummed, waiting for him to continue. “A tiger print—”

“Absolutely not.”

A pout formed on his lips, “You don’t even know what I was going to say.” Soonyoung whined in protest.

You shook your head, “Don’t have to. We’re not getting anything tiger printed.”

“Sometimes I think you actually hate me,” he joked.

“Yeah, I do,” you snorted. “I absolutely hate you and invited you to move in with me.”

He placed a kiss by your cheek. “Fine, we can talk about that later on.”

You rolled your eyes, even though he couldn’t see it. “I was actually thinking we could get some long mirrors? You know, so you can dance when you want to.” You pointed at the empty wall, “Place them all over there and just get you a small studio? I mean, I know it’s not a lot of space but—”

Soonyoung giggled, interrupting your train of thought. His arms turned you around to face him. You smiled at his actions, fingers lacing by the back of his neck. “Can I tell you something?” You nodded. “I’m really happy.”

You brushed the hair out of his face, thumb then moving to caress his cheek. “Me, too.”

“Soo?” You called out when you opened the front door. It was Thursday and you stayed late in the office, which meant Soonyoung was most likely home by now. Unless he had also stayed late in the studio.

No response. The lights of the common areas were all out, making you furrow your eyebrows. Was he still at the school?

“Ow!” You then heard his voice from the bedroom. You sighed. What did he do now?

You dropped your belongings by the kitchen counter, feet moving quickly in the direction of Soonyoung’s probable agony. When you reached the door, what you saw was nothing like you had expected.

Soonyoung was naked. Up until then, normal. He was hard. Also, normal. And then it got weird. He had his cock in a pizza box. He wasn’t holding a pizza box on top of his body. The box had a hole in the middle and his cock was halfway through it. You blinked several times, maybe trying to understand that you weren’t actually imagining such a ridiculous scene. The cover of the box rested on his stomach, one hand keeping it up, while the other one tried to somewhat get himself out of the hole he had, quite literally, gotten himself into.

“What the fuck is going on?” Your tone wasn’t accusatory. You were just very much confused. It’d be great to come home to pizza, especially after a long day. But this wasn’t really what you had in mind.

Your boyfriend whined at the sight of you, “Baby, oh my God.”

You did your best to hold back a laugh, but this seemed too tragic, even for someone like him. “Soonyoung, what are you doing?”

“I was trying to, you know, test it out before tomorrow,” he sighed, “but clearly I fucked up.”

You and Soonyoung had date nights every Friday. It was usually nothing big, just something you came up with to have something to look forward to during the week. Sometimes, it felt like every night was date night, but it was still nice to have that specific day saved for the two of you.

Date night didn’t mean a day you’d exclusively had sex. Especially as Soonyoung still had that insane drive, so you usually fucked almost every day. But, still, sometimes, you had special things planned. He liked to try different things and, if it was with him, you were open to pretty much anything. You trusted him too much not to experiment. And he was a very curious person, wanting to do everything at least once.

Eventually, Soonyoung found out he really liked role-playing. It wasn’t your personal favorite, but you had a lot of fun, too. The first time you tried it, he acted as if you were a stranger in a bar and tried to pick you up. The two of you were at home, and you dressed up nicely to get in the mood. It took you a bit to adjust to it, the idea being something completely new, but you were a fast learner.

When you got used to it, finding almost as much pleasure in it as he did, it became a recurring plan. You tried the classics - teacher and student, doctor and patient, landlord and tenant, boss and assistant - finding out it could really be a nice addition to the usual fucking. Soonyoung made your sex life anything but boring. The last one he mentioned wanting to try was the famous pizza guy. So when you came home to that, you had a bit of an idea of what he was doing.

You rubbed your temples in distress. “Is-is your dick stuck?”

“Yes,” he said, with a cry. The pout in his lips got bigger by the second.

“Oh my God.” That was all you managed to say. You knew Soonyoung was quite a disaster sometimes. Still, not even in your wildest thoughts, you saw this coming. You were still frozen in tracks, barely stepping foot inside the room.

“I think I cut the hole too small,” he explained, “which is actually a good thing, because it means my dick is bigger than I thought.” You looked up, a laugh finally managing to escape. “Don’t laugh!”

You looked at him, lips pursed. You inhaled a couple of times to calm yourself down, while he stood there, downing in his own embarrassment. “I’m sorry,” you said, “but this is just insane.”

He shook his head, doing his best not to laugh, too. “Can you please help me?”

You nodded, “Let me go get the scissors.”

Soonyoung’s eyes went wide, “What? Are you gonna cut my dick out?” He tried to take it out once more, but it was clearly pointless. “No, I’m not letting you do that.”

“What?” You asked, confused.

“You’re not chopping my dick off. I need it. You need it. I know I give good head, but it's nothing compared to my stroke game." He shook his head multiple times. "How can you even consider that? You're insane. Besides, it would hurt so fucking much." Soonyoung tried to fix things one more time, a groan escaping him when he failed. "More than this hurts."

You stared at him, hands put together in front of your chest in a begging manner. “Baby?”

“What?”

“I’m gonna cut the box,” you said, tone obvious and amused.

He blinked a couple of times, trying to make sense of your words. “Oh,” Soonyoung said, nodding his head. “That makes sense.” He blinked a couple of times, stopping you before you actually moved. “Wait!”

You sighed, "What now?"

"I even drew on the top of the box," he exhaled in frustration. Your boyfriend's fingers moved to the cardboard material, bringing the cover down. It had a tiger drawing right in the middle.

You squinted your eyes trying to see what was written there. When you realized what it was, you couldn't help but giggle. "Soonyoung's tiger pizza?" He nodded again and you snorted. "I'll try to cut as little as possible."

"Thanks, babe."

Before going to the bathroom to get the object that had made him terrified about a minute ago, you finally moved closer to your boyfriend. You removed the strands that were falling on his eyes, trying to place them behind his ears. You had that look again. He stared at you in confusion. “I love you,” you said, with a laugh.

Soonyoung giggled, “I love you, too.” You leaned in and placed a small peck by his lips.

He was absolutely crazy. Unbelievable. Annoying. But still, you wouldn’t change him for the world. He messed you up in more ways than one. But still, no one did it better.

“But can you please hurry? It’s starting to hurt.”

“I swear to God, Soonyoung,” you said, hitting his hand, “if you touch this food again, you will not eat.”

You were cooking. Or, at least, trying. It wasn’t an easy task when your boyfriend decided he was going to stay attached to you while you made dinner. His arms only detangled themselves from your waist to try to eat whatever you were working on at the moment.

You stirred the sauce, putting a bit on the back of your hand. After having a taste, you realized it lacked a bit of salt. You had settled for something simple, going for spaghetti bolognese. Part of it because you liked it, part of it because you actually sucked in the kitchen. Doki fed you most of the time and, when they didn’t, you and Krys usually got take out. When Soonyoung moved in, you risked cooking a bit more, but still, it wasn’t much. That wasn’t really in your area of interest, to be honest.

“You’ll let me starve?” He asked, placing a kiss by your cheek.

“Yes,” you said, with no hesitation.

He laughed against your neck, “It’s okay, I can eat pussy later.” God, Soonyoung was absolutely shameless.

You shook your head, not believing his words. “Keep going, and you won’t get food or pussy,” you threatened.

“You’re so mean to me,” he whined.

“You deserve it.” You checked on the meat again. Almost done. “Can you please go sit somewhere while I finish this?”

He kissed you again, “No.” You sighed. “Am I actually stopping you from doing anything?”

You thought about it for a moment, realizing he was setting you up. You had no escape, actually. “No, but—”

“Then I’m not going anywhere,” he said, triumphantly.

You huffed, “You’re unbearable.”

He pulled you even closer, “Yet, you went on several dates with me, and now we’re living together.”

Looking back at your relationship made you feel funny. Soonyoung wasn’t the type of guy you’d go for. You didn’t actually have a type, but he had nothing in common with your past love interests. Maybe that’s why it worked so well.

You remembered how you couldn’t really stop seeing each other ever since the first date. You went out week, after week, after week. You thought about how you called him annoying at every chance you got, but that didn’t stop you from going back for more. He was that enticing.

No one has ever made you feel like Soonyoung did. These feelings were hard to find, you discovered. And you often tried to explain everything that roamed through your chest when it came to him. It was like he placed every single good sentiment inside you with his hands, his lips, his hips. Like he had magic all over him and was capable of making you feel invincible.

Loving and being loved by Soonyoung was made out of contradictions. It was exciting, keeping you on your toes all the time. But it was also calming, soothing. It was roaming hands and desperate kisses. But it was also gentle touches and soft pecks. It was never knowing what to expect, the butterflies at the pit of your stomach never really going away. But it was also knowing each other so much you could actually predict one another’s actions and reactions. It was the delicious anxiousness of a surprise. But it was also the reassuring taste of familiarity. It was the frenzy of shared laughs. But also the warmth of relieving tears. It was the buzz of a first love. But it was also the maturity of a well-built one.

When you looked at Soonyoung, you wondered how you fell this hard, this fast. But, thinking deeper about it, it was the only alternative. You remembered Doki’s first description of him, them saying he was perfect for you. You disagreed back then, saying there was no such thing as the perfect man for you. Foolish, you. There was, and life made sure he found his way to you.

You weren’t really looking for anything when you met him. You felt fine, complete. You hated this idea that love’s supposed to make you feel whole. You felt whole already. And that’s exactly where the beauty in this relationship laid. Soonyoung didn’t complete you, he made you overflow.

He brought out the best in you, and you did the same for him. You didn’t try to change each other, always focusing on simple adjustments and compromises. Besides, you loved who he was too much to ask for anything different. And he always made sure to remind you he felt the same way.

You didn’t really like to think about not having him around. First, because you didn’t think you’d have to go through that anytime soon, or, perhaps, ever, but also because that would do you no good. So you just decided to savor what you had now. That was enough.

The stereo was playing a song that the two of you liked, Soonyoung gently humming in your ear. “This song reminds me of you,” he said.

“Really?” You tasted some of the pasta now. Just the right amount of seasoning.

“Yeah,” he nodded by the crook of your neck. “I think during one of our first dates, maybe the second one, I’m not sure now. You mentioned not looking for a boyfriend, something like that. But I was already really into you,” he giggled at his confession, feeling like a high school kid. “So I just had to put a poker face on.”

You laughed, turning off the pits and shifting your body to look at him. “Well, I didn’t lie.” You shrugged, “I really wasn’t looking for a boyfriend back then.”

“I know.”

A smile took over your features, “That didn’t stop you from finding me, though.”

When Soonyoung looked at you, he felt sparks. The same sparks he got when he first took your hand on your second date while you were crossing a street, even though he acted as if he felt nothing. The same sparks he got when he first kissed you at that traffic light. The same sparks he got when he first fucked you in his bed. The same sparks he got when he first woke up by your side, the morning sun shining on your skin. The same sparks he was getting every single day ever since you stepped foot into his life. And he would never get enough of it.

He wasn’t really looking for anything when he first met you, too. Soonyoung was never really looking for anything. But that was his favorite thing about it, about you. It was the way that life was so amazing and so extraordinary, that it made sure you came to him at just the right time.

So he just smiled, realizing how lucky the two of you were to share such a love. To have found someone that made you feel like that. He couldn’t really ask for anything else.

“I know.”

Soonyoung pulled you away from the counter slightly, body then swinging rhythmically to the tune in the background. You giggled, “I have to finish dinner.”

“And I have to dance with you for a bit,” he said, offering you a grin.

It was pointless to fight, and, honestly, you didn’t really want to. So, once again, you just allowed yourself to be swept by Soonyoung’s endeavors.

“Can I tell you something?” You asked, voice gentle. He nodded, “I don’t think I’ll ever feel this way again. No one will ever make me feel the way you do.”

Soonyoung got the sparks once again. It was like his chest was made out of fireworks, and you had just ignited them. When he looked into your eyes, he saw so much love he felt like he was really about to explode.

One of his hands left your back to rest against your cheek. His palm was warm. “Lucky for you, I don’t plan on going anywhere.”

“Good,” you said. “Because I think I can put up with your annoying ass for many years from now.”

“Are you proposing?” He teased.

“No,” you giggled. “We’re not getting married anytime soon.”

You haven’t really talked about it, but you just had this feeling that it would come, eventually. Just not now. The two of you had several steps to take first. And, knowing your boyfriend like you did, you knew marriage wasn’t a priority for him, much like it wasn’t for you. You were happy like that.

Soonyoung felt his heart beating faster at the mention of the possibility of spending the rest of his life by your side. It was thumping by his ear, he could sense it. He had no precise thoughts on marriage, not really having the time or the reason to consider it before, but just imagining you in a white dress gave him shivers. He’d leave this for later, though. He was too happy to change anything about it. He had a lot more he wanted to do before that. He had a lot more he wanted to do with you before that. So all he did was laugh and nod.

He swirled you around for a couple more minutes and, as if on cue, the stereo echoed the same words that left his lips. “I think I love you so much.”

“You think?”

“No,” he smiled your favorite smile, “I know.”

a/n: oh wow. wow! this was a journey. if you made it this far, thank you. i legit do not know what to say because this came from a simple ask that gave me soonyoung brainrot for god knows how many days now. also, this is the most shameless self insert i have ever written in idk 4 years of writing. mc is me, the sides are my friends and this is all based on a universe we created and have been obsessing about for weeks. anyways! first, thank you to the two biggest supporters of this idea, @bbugyu and @babiemingoo. if it wasn't for the two of you, this fic prob wouldn't even exist. thank you for the countless hcs that helped me build this, thank you for proof reading, and thank you for literally everything. i love you guys a lot!!!! thank you to my faithful beta, @yoongitalks. what would i do without you? thank you @jaeyoonurl for making me add the pizza dick scene. it's prob one of my favorites. i hope this was as much fun to read as it was to write. as usual, my askbox is always open for feedback or whatever else you want to say or share! also, editing this was a bitch, so if you spot any formatting mistakes, pls, let me know!!!!! as i most likely missed something. THAT'S IT FOLKS I HOPE YOU LIKE IT!

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brighteststar707 · 3 years ago

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Saeyoung's first memories of music are the childrens' rhymes he used to sing to Saeran when he was sad. He would hear them in school and teach them to his brother at night, sometimes with a few of the lyrics changed.

He only starts listening to music in his ratty little university dorm room years later. He finds it easier to lose himself in the work he has been assigned when he can't hear the sounds of his floormates right outside his door. The sounds of life going on around him only remind him of what (who) he's missing.

He has work playlists that are hours long filled with every genre imaginable. To everyone else, they're incomprehensible, but as usual, they make perfect sense to him. Each one he has made to fit a mood, or sometimes a project he's working on.

The first time he hears your voice, it's like a switch flips in his brain. His music doesn't help him dissociate anymore. His mind spins and spins in circles and lands firmly back on you every time. Instead, he starts saving songs that remind him of you. He titles the playlist with just with your first initial. He's embarrassed, but he figures you'll never see it.

At the apartment, he works in complete silence for the first time in years. He puts his headphones on so that you don't approach him but doesn't play a thing. He wants to hear you, even if he won't let himself reply.

He works to the sounds of your life going on around him instead. You humming songs when you think he can't hear you, your quiet footsteps padding back and forth. He doesn't want to admit it, but it helps him focus better than any playlist does.

A few hours into the drive to find Saeran, he gives you his phone to play music from and quickly regrets it when you find the playlist he made for you. He dissolves into a stuttery mess but doesn't attempt to take the phone from you. You play it and watch his ears turn red.

You move into the bunker with him and fill the empty space with music, not unlike how he used to do before. The difference is that instead of shutting out the rest of the world with music, when you do it, it's like you're letting the world in.

You have a shared playlist that you fill with songs that make you both feel like you could fly. He spins you around the kitchen until you squeal and he dips you dramatically at the end of each song to kiss you.

#mystic messenger #mystic messenger saeyoung #saeyoung choi #mysme saeyoung #mysme 707 #luciel choi #cheritz #my writing

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tyonfs · 4 years ago

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i like me better (when i’m with you)

PAIRING ▸ jeong jaehyun x fem!reader

GENRES ▸ friends to enemies to lovers, college au, sports, friends with benefits, smut, crack, fluff

WARNINGS ▸ sexual !! tension !! lots of it, smut (public sex, fingering, hate sex, raw sex, pool sex, oral sex), mark lee cockblocking, also yes, there’s actual fluff

SUMMARY ▸ there was no one else on the planet that made your blood boil like jeong jaehyun did. you never thought your feelings toward him were anything past pure hatred, but when you were lost in the feeling of his lips on yours and his hands on your body, you couldn’t help but think that maybe a part of you didn’t completely hate his guts.

PLAYLIST ▸ i like me better by lauv • unravel me by sabrina claudio

WORD COUNT ▸ 11896 words

TAG LIST ▸ @gotoartistprofile @chanluster @steamyjaehyun

AUTHOR’S NOTE ▸ big shoutout to fia for hyping me up to complete this and i hope you guys enjoy it !! thank you so much for reading ♡ part of the dunk shot! series but can be read separately!

SOMETIMES, THE AMOUNT OF HATRED YOU HAD FOR JEONG JAEHYUN AMAZED YOU.

To the average human being, Jeong Jaehyun was, in a sense, perfect. On the surface, he was everyone’s trademark Golden Boy—good grades, athletic, and a seemingly good personality. The last point, however, was a complete and utter lie. Simply put, Jaehyun was a wolf in sheep’s clothing, and you, unfortunately, wound up becoming his target.

If it weren’t for your love for cheerleading, you probably would never have to see Jaehyun, but your passion came with a price. Competitors were often asked a series of questions, and these questions typically included inquiring about your hardships as an athlete. If someone were to ask you what the hardest part of being a cheerleader was, your answer would not be what they expected.

It wasn’t getting back up after bad falls that left you with bruises and a concussion. It wasn’t dealing with the basketball team’s aftermath of a devastating loss and having to cheer them on through it. It wasn’t waking up extra early for morning practices, or having to push yourself to run miles in the sweltering heat. Hell, it wasn’t even dealing with the horny basketball team members at afterparties.

It was the annual training camp.

Every winter, the team attended a week-long training session along with several other teams in the city. With state-of-the-art facilities and a massive training center, the training camp was an event that the entire team looked forward to. Although the training was brutal, the luxury of the hotel rooms and the gourmet meals had made up for all of that. Yet, despite all of that, the camp itself was still hell for you.

It wasn’t all bad, though. In fact, you indulged in the concept of a training camp, delighted with the opportunity to meet cheerleaders from different universities. A handful of your friends from high school had joined teams at different universities, so it was exciting to get to see them all again. All in all, it was the whole package deal: friends, your favorite sport, and fun times. What could possibly ruin that?

Well, a certain someone by the name of Jeong Jaehyun could, and that wonderful individual incensed your fury quite like no other.

“You again,” you spat, clutching your duffel bag strap. You had just gotten off the bus to head into the hotel, but the devil himself was blocking your way.

“Y/N,” the devil cooed, “do you need help carrying that?”

“I’m fine.”

You shrugged Jaehyun off and tried to move past him, but the bane of your existence had other plans. He tossed you a small carton of milk; it was the kind you could buy at a vending machine. Your reflexes kicked in just in time for you to catch it, giving him a questioning look.

“You should be drinking more milk, Y/N. It’s good for you,” Jaehyun said. You were sure he was going to make a snide comment so you opened your mouth to protest, but he continued, “Jaemin likes big tits, you know?”

Ouch.

You and Jaehyun went farther back than you’d like to admit. While you did currently attend different universities, you had the joyous experience of going to the same high school as him. He wasn’t too different now; he had the same dimpled smile, the same godly features, and the same cocky smirk when things were going the way he planned. What was different was that you two were once friends.

And what took the cake? You had a big crush on his friend and fellow teammate. Introducing Na Jaemin, everyone.

It wasn’t like you never got over Jaemin, but you had to admit that your heart still fluttered pitifully whenever you saw him. It didn’t help that he was so breathtakingly beautiful, so undeniably genuine, and such a sweetheart. Unfortunately, Jaehyun knew of your little secret. Being the conniving little snake he was, he used it to his advantage.

Ever since your fallout with him in your senior year of high school, you’ve hated Jeong Jaehyun, and you were sure he hated you right back. It almost felt akin to the competition at this point, and you were a pretty sore loser. Honestly, you were sad initially when he broke off your friendship in senior year and threw crude insults at you. You normally didn’t let things get to you, but it hurt to hear that your best friend didn’t want anything to do with you after you had told him you were going to a different university. You were sure the both of you had grown past that, but now he had changed from a sincere highschooler to a complete low-life piece of shit.

“You’re a douche, Jaehyun,” you sneered.

A grin spread across his face. “Yeah, I know.”

You scoffed. “God, if I could, I would smash that pretty face into—”

“Hey!” a loud voice laced with trepidation interjected. It was your best friend on your school’s basketball team, Mark Lee, coming to your rescue; or, rather, he was trying to prevent you from doing something you’d most probably regret. He shot Jaehyun a warning look and slung an arm around your shoulders. “Y/N, what’re you doing here? We have to check into our hotel rooms.”

You looked back at Jaehyun to see a smug look on his face before he turned to catch up to Taeyong and Jaemin. You looked back up at Mark, who was also keeping an eye out for the demon in disguise.

“Thanks for getting me out of that mess,” you mumbled. “That guy is so infuriating. I can’t believe he still brings up Jaemin when I’m clearly over him!”

Your words were sharp enough that Mark and the people around you flinched, even if they weren’t completely paying attention to your rant. It was common knowledge that Jaehyun’s presence left you in low spirits, and Mark had come to terms that you would always be in a bitter mood during the training camp, and that there was only one person to blame for it.

Mark shot you a sympathetic look that you knew was intended to show his helpfulness, but instead just served to make you appear all the more bitter.

“Why don’t you just ignore him?” he suggested. “He’s just looking for a reaction out of you.”

“If I let him get the last word, then he wins.”

“At least he’d stop bothering you,” Mark reasoned as you both made your way to where your team had gathered by the reception desk.

“Is this about Jaehyun again?” Zhong Chenle chimed in, a devilish grin plastered across his face. “You’re a handful, Y/N.”

“Hey! What’s that supposed to mean?” you snapped.

Chenle just stared at you, arching a brow as if the answer should have been obvious. “You and Jaehyun,” he said, “there’s some tension there.”

“Wow, Sherlock Holmes. Observant, aren’t you?” you spat, words dripping with sarcasm. “We’ve hated each other for years. Of course there’s tension.”

Johnny Suh snorted, averting his gaze as to not bring attention to himself. Chenle rolled his eyes, a delighted smile on his face as he watched you carefully, digging into his bag of chips in the meantime.

“Y/N, I think he means a different kind of tension,” Mark said.

“What kind of tension?” you asked, shocking the rest of them with your surprisingly innocent response. In retrospect, it was more because you couldn’t imagine the answer being anything past the realm of hatred.

While they all hesitated to respond, Johnny spoke up, “He meant the ‘I wanna beat you up and then have rough sex with you’ kind of tension.”

You immediately froze—long enough for Chenle to take a picture of your reaction—the expression on your face a cross between incredulity and visceral rage. You must have looked like a ticking time bomb because Mark had to take a cautious step back.

“Come again? Rough sex?” You were well aware of how strangled and pitched your voice sounded as soon as it escaped your lips, how guilty it sounded, but you couldn’t focus on that as the weight of Johnny’s words were sinking in. “Jaehyun and I?”

“Yeah, pretty much,” Johnny answered.

“That’s a lie.”

“Yeah? Then why do you two always look at each other so weird?”

You didn’t know how to defend yourself now so you just said, “He’s a bastard and I would never see him in any other way.”

“You say that now but we all know—”

“Alright, let’s drop it,” Mark said, trying to defuse the situation before you blew it up into an argument. “I would rather go rest in my hotel room rather than bear witness to a homicide.”

“Fine, fine,” Johnny relented.

You scoffed and jabbed at his foot with yours before letting the topic go. Your squabbles with them were all in good nature, but this one somehow put you off. It was like Johnny had planted the seeds and were waiting for them to grow. You were starting to mull over every interaction you’ve had with Jeong Jaehyun.

Johnny and Chenle had made a startlingly accurate observation. You and Jaehyun did look at each other for a little too long sometimes, nearly to the point where it seemed like you were basking in the attention of the other—

No fucking way.

You were not going down that path. There was nothing more to your relationship with Jeong Jaehyun than pure hatred and resentment. He was a douchebag who was intent on making you feel like shit. His only motive was to start shit again between you and Jaemin, who you would’ve completely forgotten by now if it weren’t for him.

No way. There was absolutely no undercurrent of desire that was creeping its way to be uncovered.

Or was there? a small, treacherous part of your mind offered.

You were lost in your thoughts as the coaches handed you your room key, as you waited for your roommate who was some girl named Eunha from the other school, as you made your way to your room on the fifth floor.

The only thing you could think about were those long stares, those mesmerizing eyes, and the implication behind them. You always attributed it to Jaehyun being a hormonal teenage boy, but you had to admit that you’ve seen him look at you with some semblance of lust. Perhaps that same feeling was buried far in the depths of your consciousness, too.

Could you possibly be attracted to the devil incarnate, Jeong Jaehyun?

No, you argued with yourself, and shit, even your frontal lobe sounded pretty unconvinced. He’s a petty bastard and that’s all he’ll ever be.

You instilled the mantra of you and Jaehyun being sworn enemies in your head, but you couldn’t help the fact that it was peppered by the memories of an irritatingly familiar smirk. You scowled, willing your head to get rid of all-things-Jeong-Jaehyun, but he was right there.

Literally.

He was standing right in front of you.

“Hey, neighbor,” he teased, all too satisfied with the horrified look on your face. “Guess you can’t get rid of me.”

You were falling when you jolted awake.

A groan tore its way past your lips. You made sure you didn’t disrupt Eunha’s sleep before you recounted your dream. It had been a while since you’ve had one, and realization was morphing into shame when you realized what kind of dream it was. You’ve never had a wet dream before but what made you want to astral project yourself into oblivion was when you realized that Jaehyun caused it.

After tossing and turning for a couple of minutes in a desperate attempt for sleep to overcome you once more, you came to terms with the fact that you were staying awake for now. Staying awake was worse, though, because there was no way you could keep the intruding thoughts at bay. Not with the way Jeong Jaehyun kept flashing behind your eyelids, at least.

You considered how to spend the rest of your night, surveying your options as you stared up at the ceiling:

Watch season three of Riverdale on Netflix so you could make fun of it.

Attempt to sleep, but with little success because there was no way you were going back to bed after that dream.

Count the slacks of the window’s blinds even though it would be pointless because what the fuck were you going to do with that information?

It was truly astounding how interesting your life was.

You couldn’t think clearly with Eunha’s soft snoring, so you grabbed your keys and pushed the door open carefully to keep it from squealing. After your delicate movements to escape your room quietly, you leaned against the wall and let out a sigh of relief. You weren’t too keen on someone scolding you in the middle of the night for being outside, but you needed to clear your head somewhere. You packed for weather that was balmy, but the air conditioner carried a bite to it that made you wish you hadn’t just worn shorts and a tank top to bed.

You could practically hear Mark mocking you if he were here: Are you in the right headspace, Y/N?

You shook your head, getting your provoking best friend out of there, but instead, you found yourself wandering into dangerous territory again.

Johnny and Chenle were parroting the same words over and over again in your head. You wished you could use your metaphysical hands in your head and squeeze the life out of them, but they always flew out of your grasp. You clicked your tongue absentmindedly, your annoyance rehashing itself as your mind gravitated back to Jeong Jaehyun with his stupid smirk and annoyingly persistent cockiness. It was almost pitiful that you hated his guts and yet you couldn’t deny the magnetism he carried, the pull that made your breath hitch when he met your eyes.

His presence was announced by the change in the air more than anything else. You didn’t have to see him to know he was there. You clenched your jaw; you couldn’t catch a break from him even during the ungodly hours of the night.

He was unavoidable.

He hummed with amusement. “Look who’s here.”

“What are you doing up this late? Go to bed.”

You didn’t even bother to look at him because there was one thing you were sure of and it was that you could not look at his sickeningly attractive face right now. Jaehyun didn’t move, blatantly ignoring your order. The tension was so thick that you wanted to storm away, but you knew he would follow you just to piss you off.

“I couldn’t sleep,” he said. “You should be the one resting up. You cheerleaders always train until you’re near death.”

“Can’t sleep,” was your curt response.

He laughed once, a short sound that was pretty much gone the moment it hit your eardrums. “What? You get nightmares or something?”

“So what if I do?” you retaliated, getting oddly defensive. It was a given that you’d lie about getting a nightmare over a wet dream. “It’s none of your business.”

He laughed again but this time it was lower, more dangerous. “It’s my business when it concerns you.”

“I have and will never be your business, Jeong Jaehyun.”

He leaned against the wall. “I beg to differ.”

“Then keep begging.”

“If you say so.”

“Jaehyun,” you interrupted your own banter. “What’s the point of this conversation? Just go back to your room so we can go back to not talking to each other.”

“I’m good, thanks.”

“That’s unfortunate,” you said. “I don’t want to talk to you, so go find someone who does.”

“We don’t have to talk.” Suddenly, his voice sounded closer, and you forced your gaze down at the strangely-patterned hotel carpet.

You swallowed thickly. “I’m here to clear my head. I don’t want you to hover around me for the rest of the night.”

“Actually, I had something else in mind.”

He closed in on you, one of his hands skimming up the soft skin of your arm. A shudder ran down your spine as you felt his fingers travel up to your shoulder, your collarbone, and then the side of your neck. With a swift movement, he caged you in his arms, biceps flexing as he did.

What was going on? You couldn’t quite keep up with the situation but the way Jaehyun was looking down at you made you feel hot. It was exactly like your dream—

“Holy fuck, Jaehyun.”

You couldn’t stop the words from escaping your lips when you felt his hot breath on your neck. Your head went fuzzy and you were pretty sure your knees were ready to buckle under you. The corner of Jaehyun’s lip lifted into a smirk as if he had been planning this. You mustered a scowl at him but one thing was clear: you screwed yourself over by getting into this situation.

Damn it. You knew you should’ve watched season three of Riverdale instead

Also, Chenle and Johnny were right. Not that you’d ever tell them that; put simply, you were a sore loser.

Lust was swimming in Jaehyun’s eyes. The way he caged you felt predatory, a show of dominance rather than passion. That smirk of his carved in deeper, and it only pissed you off. Yet, as much as it pissed you off, all you wanted him to do was just ruin you.

Your pride was too strong, though, and you concluded that you would rather stick a fork in your eye than let Jaehyun do what he wanted. This sparked a dilemma in your head: to fuck or not to fuck Jaehyun, that was the question. One sounded like a pretty uneventful night, while the other sounded appealing save for the self-loathing you’d experience afterward.

“You want me, Y/N,” he cooed. “I know you do.”

“I hate you.”

“Trust me, I know.”

“I mean it, Jaehyun,” you hissed. Your head was screaming at you to just go with it, but denying Jaehyun’s advances and provokes was just natural instinct to you. “I don’t want you. Stop lying to yourself.”

“Is that so? I think you’re the liar here,” he replied easily as you dodged his attempt to kiss you.

You pushed at his muscular arm but he didn’t budge. For a moment, you strongly considered just dropping to the ground and crawling out from under his legs, but you were done for. Seconds later, Jaehyun’s hand flew up, long fingers digging into the soft flesh of your face as he forced your chin upward to look at him directly. The lust in his eyes was so clear, so alluring, and it made you stop struggling for a second.

“I’m not going to ask you again. Let go of me.”

“Good, it’s a waste of breath.”

“Has anyone ever told you how infuriating you are?”

“You did. Many times.”

“Just fuck off already.”

Your words were like poison, but for some odd reason, Jaehyun was immune to it. Any reasonable person would at least flinch, but Jaehyun was so fixated on his one goal. Again, he didn’t budge. He gazed into your eyes with a fierce intensity that threw you off.

“Just let me fucking kiss you, Y/N.”

His smirk was gone. He wasn’t teasing you anymore. Jaehyun’s eyes darkened with his command.

He leaned in and you could feel his hot breath fanning your lips, drinking in your appearance. You were pulled into his trap and you hated yourself for it. You swallowed hard as all of your worries about being with Jaehyun and getting caught had started to fade away. All you could do was yield to him.

“Fine,” you whispered.

“Good girl,” was all he got out before basically smashing your lips together.

It was rushed, messy, and way too rough. Jaehyun grabbed the back of your neck, his other arm still locking you in place. Your hands moved from gripping at the front of his shirt to slowly wrapping around his neck. You weren’t sure how you felt, but there was something that made you want to tangle your fingers in his hair and get lost in him.

The moment Jaehyun’s tongue slid along the crease of your lips, you were conflicted. You weren’t exactly sure what to do so he took the reins. You wondered if he was expressing his pent-up hatred as well. It was clear in the way he was taking prying your mouth open with his tongue, snaking his hot muscle to dance with yours as if he had something to prove. He wanted you to see that he was the dominant one, that he had leverage over the situation.

But when he broke away, he flipped the switch. The both of you were left catching your breath, Jaehyun resting his forehead against yours in a feeling that had a weird sort of intimacy stemming from it. His hand dropped from your neck to brush messy locks of hair behind your shoulders.

Well, that explained why humans were so tempted by the devil.

“That wasn’t so bad, was it?” Jaehyun grinned down at you.

You fought down the shyness that was creeping into your chest. Before you could respond, the both of you turned your heads at the sound of footsteps. A flashlight glimpsed by you when you saw two dark figures at the end of the hall. It didn’t sound like your coach, but you weren’t too keen on sticking around to figure out who it was.

“Son, how in the world did you get locked out of your room this late?” one of them asked.

“I’m telling you, I needed to use the bathroom so I went outside without my key, and then I remembered the bathroom was in the room.”

That voice was most definitely Mark.

“Hey!” the security guard scolded when he saw you two. “What are you kids doing? It’s late!”

“You’re on your own.” You pushed Jaehyun away from you and fumbled for your keys before Mark or the security guard could spot you. “Bye.”

You jammed your key in, not worried about waking up your roommate anymore. All you could hear was Jaehyun growling out a short string of curses before you shut the door behind him and leaned against it. Your head was still reeling in what had just happened, but that kiss had left you in the clouds. You could feel the ghost of his lips on yours. Dazed, you just fell onto your bed, into the entrancing clutches of sleep.

You were exhausted when you woke up, and you blamed Jaehyun for it.

You weren’t in the proper condition for training; you hadn’t gotten enough sleep and your head was a mess (well, you supposed you were the only one to blame for the latter). You forgot to set your alarm so you woke up to Eunha shaking you gently, coaxing you into stirring. She was already dressed, tying her hair up in a ponytail. You all but jumped out of bed when you saw her, thinking you were late.

“What time is it?” you asked groggily, rubbing the sleep from your eyes as you stood up and tried to adjust to the morning light.

“You’ve still got plenty of time,” she assured you. “I just like to get ready early so I can go for a quick run.”

“Ah, okay. Have fun,” you mumbled before she left the room, leaving you to drag yourself around the room to get ready. You heard a knock at the door and went to open it, assuming it was Eunha forgetting her keys. Your eyes narrowed when you saw who it was. “Jaehyun?”

“I couldn’t stop thinking about you.” His voice was somewhere between a pant and a rasp as if he had been working out, which he probably was judging by the sheen of sweat on his biceps.

“Were you waiting for Eunha to leave?” you asked. “You’re disgusting. Why would you think about me?”

“I was thinking about how much of a bitch you are for running away and letting me get in trouble like that.”

“Pity.” You mocked a pout for him. “Now move. I have to get ready.”

“Let me in.”

You made a face at the thought. You knew where he was going with this and you needed to stop it. “No. You’re disgusting.”

“You liked it last night.”

His eyes searched yours in the dim light, looking for something that unfortunately was there: longing. You were never the greatest at hiding your emotions, which was why you couldn’t lie to yourself and refuse Jaehyun. Screw your transparency. Jaehyun grinned at your silence and took a step in your room when you opened your door wider for him.

You closed the door. “I hated every second of it,” you said in a childish attempt to get on his nerves.

You were a terrible liar.

Your back was against the door in a second. You could only let out a soft gasp before he kissed you, hands on your waist, slowing his movements unlike the hurriedness from last night. It was foreign, the way he kissed you like you were the only girl he saw. You pulled away quickly but it just left the both of you staring at each other’s lips.

“You sure about that?” His lips curled into a smirk.

“Don’t get me wrong,” you warned in a low voice, “I still hate your guts.”

“As I’m reminded of every single time I see you,” he returned coolly.

“Fuck off.”

This time, you pulled him down to kiss him again. You fisted your hand into his hair, tugging at his dark locks as your lips moved smoothly against his. Caught off guard, Jaehyun groaned, low and deep against your lips.

The two of you separated again before Jaehyun said, “See? I know you want me. Only I can make you feel this good, Y/N.”

You scoffed. “We’ll see about that.”

Jaehyun’s eyes darkened at the challenge. To prove his point, he pushed his knee up and between your legs, pressing against your clothed cunt. A gasp escaped your lips, the fingers curled in his hair instinctively tightening. You bit your lip but to no avail; a whimper escaped your lips as soon as he started pulsing his knee against you. You grabbed onto his shoulders for leverage, burying your face into his chest while bunching up the thin fabric of his shirt.

You wanted to hold back your moans because you were adamant about not giving Jeong Jaehyun the satisfaction of hearing you moan. Instead, you shifted your hips so that the pressure of his knee became more intense. Sparks flew behind your eyelids as he bounced his knee under you.

He finally released the tight grip he had on your waist in favor of palming one of your breasts, squeezing it firmly through your shirt and bra. All the while, he continued ramming his knee against the apex of your legs. He kept his eyes on yours and you scowled at the thought of him getting off on seeing you crumble in front of him. But you couldn’t stop yourself. He wanted to completely and utterly ruin you, wanted to fuck you in and shut you up.

The worst part was that you wanted to let him.

“You’re so cute when you’re like this,” he mused, slowly rubbing his knee in circles against you. “God, you’re still wearing that fucking tank top.”

“You’re such a—ah!”

He groped your chest again, thumb pressing down on your nipple. Another whimper escaped you as Jaehyun grazed his lips down your neck, nipping at the supple skin. You only got louder as the kisses turned into bites.

He ignored you and removed his hand. Instead, he tugged the neckline of your tank top down, delighted at the loose straps sliding down your shoulders. He yanked it down to your waist so you were exposed to him, and you swore you heard his breath hitch. Jaehyun pinched your nipple with two fingers, drawing out a moan that drove him crazy. He buried his face into your neck, sucking and making you quiver under him.

“Didn’t you say I had small tits earlier?” you jeered, a teasing lilt to your tone.

“Yeah, I still stand by that,” he replied, resulting in you punching his shoulder.

“Asshole.”

“Hey, I never said it wasn’t cute.”

“You’re such a softie,” you grumbled, but your voice was gentler than before. It was almost like you were warming up to Jeong Jaehyun, and you hated the mere thought of that.

Jaehyun pulled away from your neck. “Y/N, I want you to suck me off,” he demanded.

“I refuse.”

“Be a good girl and do it for me.”

You swore you’d go crazy if he called you ‘good girl’ one more time. You were pretty revolted at the thought of sucking his dick, but the way he looked so fragile under your hold made you want to do it for the power rush. It was like some cheap porno in a way; ‘College Jock Gets Sucked Off By Cheerleader.’ You bet half the members on the team beat their meat to something similar to that.

Your shoulders sagged. “Fine. Get on the bed.”

Jaehyun groaned at your approval. “Thank you, thank you, thank you,” he said, letting go of you to pull down his sweats on his way to your bed. He sat at the edge of it, tugging the elastic of his boxers down. You swallowed hard, tugging your tank top back up as you stared at his painfully hard erection springing out.

You got on your knees in front of him, lips parted in anticipation of taking in his length. Your hair fell over your face, which Jaehyun took notice of and held it back in a fist. Taking a deep breath, you wrapped your hand around his cock. It was rock solid to the touch and twitched at your grip. Glancing up at an eager Jaehyun, you pumped the length of it once, inciting a groan from him.

You wrapped your lips around the head of his cock, rousing a strangled noise from his throat. He looked down at you through half-lidded eyes, messy strands of your hair tangling in his fingers while his other hand was gripping the stiff hotel sheets. Then, you took him in fully at his encouragement (which was more of him just grabbing the back of your head and pushing it down on his cock).

“Shit,” he breathed out before slowly moving his hips in and out of your mouth. It was like iron wrapped around velvet, and he was relishing how hot your mouth felt.

He pushed your head down further and right as you gagged on his length, there was a knock at the door.

“Y/N!” Mark’s voice sounded from the other side. “Are you coming for breakfast?”

You pulled off of him with a pop, a string of saliva dripping off your lips. Your eyes were wide as you lunged for your phone, checking the texts. Meanwhile, Jaehyun just frowned down at you, looking up at the ceiling with a frustrated sigh.

“Holy fuck,” you muttered when you looked at the time. You called out to Mark, “Give me a minute!”

“Perfect,” Jaehyun said in a low voice and held the back of your head, attempting to push you down on him. “We can finish up now.”

“Are you an idiot?” you hissed, swatting at his hand. “I have to get out of here before Mark finds out you’re in here.”

Ignoring your state of panic, Jaehyun said, “You look so hot with drool on your chin.”

That was the most disgusting thing you had ever heard, and if it weren’t for Mark being on the other side of the door where you and Jaehyun were screwing around, you would have beat the living daylights out of him. Only a creep like Jeong Jaehyun could find something like drool sexy. You scowled at him and wiped it off with the back of your hand.

“Put your dick away,” you scolded. “Hide in the closet and you can leave when I’m gone.”

He rolled his eyes at you and stood up, making his way to the bathroom. “I need to get rid of the problem you caused.”

You had no time to complain about him jerking off in your bathroom. Mark was not a very patient man, so as soon as Jaehyun closed the door behind him, you stripped off your pajamas and threw on whatever was at the top of your suitcase. You brushed your teeth at the speed of light, using your other hand to brush down your hair. After you laced up your shoes, you opened the door to Mark looking at you suspiciously.

“You’re never late,” he pointed out.

“I couldn’t sleep last night,” you said. In your defense, it wasn’t a complete lie.

“Oh, by the way,” Mark started, “can I use your bathroom real quick?”

“No!” you exclaimed, pushing him away from your room and in the direction of the elevator. “My roommate, um, is… on her period—yeah, you don’t want to see that mess.”

Another reason why you hated Jeong Jaehyun was for giving you reasons to lie when you were a terrible liar.

Training was long and grueling. Your bones were mush and your muscles ached, pins and needles shooting through you every time you moved. As your teammates dragged you to get dinner with them, you couldn’t even resist because you were so drained.

The one thing you loved about training was that you could wear whatever you wanted, whereas you were confined to tight skirts and crop tops at your university. Now, you could rest in whatever position you wanted without worrying about exposing anything, so you didn’t hesitate to manspread as soon as you got to the cafeteria table.

“Did you guys hear about Jaehyun from the other school?” one of the girls gossiped. “Looks like he was fooling around with someone last night.”

You were grounded back into reality from whatever dimension you were floating about in. Your teammates were perplexed as you choked on air, hitting your chest to stop yourself from coughing. You were handed a glass of water, which you gingerly accepted and drank until your body had calmed down.

“Ah, sorry, Y/N,” your teammate apologized. “I forgot you and Jaehyun have bad blood between you.”

“You’re good,” you told her, waving it off. “I was surprised for a second, but I guess it makes sense for a guy like him to go around hooking up.” Then, silence fell. You were confused as they all looked at you with a puzzled look. “What? Am I stereotyping too harshly? My bad.”

“No, it’s not that,” another chimed in. “A lot of girls go around hitting on him, but Jaehyun never lays a hand on them. I thought it was common knowledge that he doesn’t do that sort of stuff, but I guess it makes sense that you don’t care about the details.”

That was news to you.

“Yeah,” you replied distantly. “I don’t care.”

So Jaehyun doesn’t hook up, was what you happened to hear around the grapevine, and he most definitely doesn’t hook up with his enemies.

You stood up in the middle of your dinner. “I gotta go,” you said. “I’ll see you girls tomorrow.”

You actually weren’t very sure where Jaehyun was, but you figured if you walked around enough, you’d run into him or someone from his team. You headed out of the canteen and walked to the basketball courts, expecting to see him dribbling a bar or doing reps. But the first person you saw was Na Jaemin, and he noticed you immediately, eyes sparkling with recognition.

“Y/N!” he greeted cheerfully. “It’s been so long.”

That infectious smile of his was plastered across his face, making a small one creep to your lips. If Jaehyun smiled like that more, then you could understand his charm, but he was always so moody around you. He either did something to get on your nerves or he would just flat-out ignore you. Furthermore, he always riled you up instead of offering you that warm security that Jaemin emanated—

Wait, why were you comparing him to Jaehyun?

“Sorry,” you apologized meekly. “Am I interrupting your practice time?”

“No, it’s cool. We were just messing around in here,” Jaemin replied. “Are you looking for someone?”

You looked into Jaemin’s eyes and your thoughts slowed. He made you feel safe, warm, but that was all; there was no fire, no rage, no heat. It was just a shallow attraction that fizzled out, leaving you neither satisfied nor dissatisfied. And you clawed at your brain as you wondered what you were getting at, but you knew. You knew it was all going back to Jaehyun.

And it pissed you off.

“I was looking for Jaehyun,” you said, “if he happened to be in here.”

“He told me he was going for a swim,” Jaemin said, and that was all you needed.

Before Jaemin could respond, you thanked him and turned on your heel. The pool was in a separate building, and there was no training that even required swimming, so it made no sense for Jaehyun to be there. You let out a frustrated sigh. Even when he wasn’t doing anything in particular to annoy you, it still managed to anger you.

You weren’t going to let Jaehyun do what he wanted this time. This was merely for interrogation—your own personal gain. Then, you thought it over some more, and you reasonably concluded that there was a 97.5% chance that you would not lay a finger on him, but there was a 2.5% chance you’d cave.

When you got to the facility where the pool was, you were entranced by the renovation at first. The pool was massive and the equipment was lined up so neatly along the walls. You peered through the glass to see the pool completely empty save for Jaehyun in the hot tub.

He met your eyes while you opened the door to the pool. His eyebrow arched at your entrance but a smirk settled on his lips as you neared him. You tried to push down your lust; you were not letting him get to you again. You crouched down by the side of the pool and Jaehyun moved so he was facing you, holding onto the edge of the hot tub.

“What brings you here?’ he asked, playfully flicking some water in your direction.

You flinched and scrunched up your nose at his action. “I heard you don’t do hookups.”

“You heard correctly.”

“So what am I?”

“You’re Y/N.”

You were a coward. Admittedly, you had probably always been running away from your own problems, deflecting your feelings with unbridled hate that had no direction, no meaning. Underneath your blunt and fiery front was pure cowardice. Even now, you refused to admit anything to yourself.

You didn’t want to accept that maybe you actually liked Jeong Jaehyun.

Maybe you’ve always liked him.

“Don’t be stupid, Jaehyun,” you grumbled. “You’ve always hated me.”

“I think you just want to believe I hate you. Is that how you suppress your feelings?”

“How long have you liked me for, then? Days?”

“Years.”

You paused for a moment as you recounted your interactions with Jaehyun. It was true that he never explicitly said he hated you and that you always started the arguments, but he was the one who broke off your friendship. Why would he do that if he didn’t hate you?

“You said you wanted nothing to do with me, Jaehyun,” you said in a smaller voice, fist balling at your side.

“You were going to a different university.” He ran a hand through his damp hair, and although you were angry, it was difficult not to enjoy the view. “Plus, you just kept going on and on about Jaemin, and I couldn’t even shut that mouth of yours up back then.”

“So you cut me off?”

“I felt like I was being petty, so I tried to apologize but you blocked my number and wouldn’t let me come near you,” Jaehyun deadpanned. He reached forward and grabbed your wrists, pulling you closer to him. You teetered on the balls of your feet, swallowing hard. “Forgive me?”

“No.”

Jaehyun rose up a little so he was eye-to-eye with you. He smiled at your flustered expression and cupped your cheek with his wet hand. Every muscle in your body was telling you to pull away but you couldn’t. Not when his lips were so close, when his eyes were boring into yours.

“Forgive me,” he repeated in a gentler tone, but it became more of an order than a question.

“Make me,” you whispered and Jaehyun groaned, somewhat helplessly.

“You’re going to be the death of me, I swear.”

You opened your mouth to say something more, but you couldn’t even form your words as Jaehyun yanked you forward and sealed your lips with a kiss. Before, you had the sense to try and push him away, but now you were held captive. He slid his tongue past your lips and you let out an appreciative whimper, hand sliding into his wet hair. You tugged at his hair and this time, Jaehyun was the one to react.

He pulled away for a moment to catch his breath, eyes clouding over with lust. “Get in with me,” he said, voice rumbling. You shivered as he dragged his lips down to your jaw; you could feel his voice reverberate down your spine and to your feet.

“What if someone walks in?” you asked in a daze.

“There’s no use for the swim facility, so no one’s going to walk in on us,” he persuaded. “Come in.”

Water dripped from his neck, landing on your thigh. You took in a sharp breath as his hand tugged at your waist. While the pleading look on his face was priceless, you couldn’t even ridicule him because you were at your limit, too. You let out an irritated sigh when you realized you gave into that 2.5% of you caving.

You responded by pulling off your shirt, tossing it to the side where Jaehyun had left his shoes and towel. Jaehyun watched you as you fiddled with the clamp of your bra. Meanwhile, his hands went to the waistband of your sweats, making you shudder as he tugged them down at the sides. You raised your hips to help him get them off and, after removing your bra, you were only left in your underwear to protect you from his hungry gaze.

You weren’t the type to hook up with guys. Hell, you weren’t the type to even show a guy your ankle if he asked. You thought you’d feel insecure with Jaehyun eyeing you in your full glory, but there was none of that. You wanted to know why it was so different with him but maybe it was the way he looked at you like he just wanted to kiss you. Or maybe a tiny part of your heart always belonged to Jaehyun, and you couldn’t bury it anymore.

“You’re so gorgeous.”

He mumbled the words, barely audible, but they set you on fire. He pulled you down onto his lap like you were his anchor, and you were afraid you’d get swept with the current, but you let him. You’ve only ever kissed a few guys before, so you really had no idea what the fuck you were getting into. All you were sure about was that Jaehyun could make you feel good and you were having your first time in a hot tub. You only prayed that you wouldn’t pass out from the pleasure combined with the heat of the water.

“Is this your first time?” he asked, gliding his hands down your sides. You nodded. “Then I’ll be gentle.” Truly, you did find his gesture rather sweet, but it didn’t stop you from rolling your eyes. Jaheyun saw and narrowed his brows. “I don’t hate you, but you really piss me off sometimes.”

He kissed you again. It was more passionate this time, but also harsher and messier. You let out a sound that was something between a yelp and a moan, making Jaehyun move his hands to run down your bare back. Then, he planted his thumb on your clit and pressed down in a way that made a muscle in your thigh twitch. Your grip on his shoulders tightened; you weren’t expecting that. It felt different in the water, but somehow, you couldn’t get enough of it.

“You’re wet,” he mumbled against your lips as his fingers found purchase on your slit.

“We’re in the water, you idiot.”

Jaehyun scoffed. “You know what, Y/N, you’re right, I did hate you,” he spat, rubbing small circles around your clit now. You wrapped your arms around his shoulders to steady yourself, whimpering as his movements grew more intense. “I fucking hated how you looked at Jaemin with those love-struck eyes.”

There was a shift in his usual cocky expression. He turned focused and, to a degree, angry. It was the kind of look on his face you saw when he was on the basketball court or during a game.

“You’re the one who told me to go after him.”

Wrong choice of words. Jaehyun lifted you up and placed you on the edge of the pool, pushing a finger inside you with no warning. You gasped, your mouth open to ask him why he took you out of the water, but you already knew the answer; he wanted to feel you completely.

“R-right there,” you whimpered out as he pushed his finger deeper inside of you.

He started to curl his finger whenever he passed over your g-spot, and you had to close your eyes. Jaehyun pulled his finger out to marvel at the slick wetness that coated it. Your body tingled as he slid his finger inside you again. This time, he was teasing your slit with a second digit. Jaehyun had no delicacy, though, and he all but shoved in a second finger, causing you to cry out.

He didn’t even care. You opened your mouth to call him a bastard, but all that came out was a pitched moan that seemed to float up to the stars.

“I fucking hated,” he rasped as he pumped two fingers inside of you, “how you treated Jaemin like he was the only one in the world.”

“I don’t… like Jaemin,” you got out, each labored breath of yours fighting off another moan. “I’ve stopped liking Jaemin after high school.”

Jaehyun’s free hand went to your chest, cupping one of your breasts as he rubbed circles around your nipple. You bit down on the inside of your cheek, unable to contain yourself as the fingers on your clit got almost frantic in their place, and the fingers inside of you were pushing against your walls. You felt an unfamiliar cold fire that felt so fucking good, lighting you up and threatening to spill over. Your muscles clenched and spasmed around Jaehyun, and you weren’t even in the hot tub but you felt like you were sinking.

A high-pitched moan left your lips, leaving you hot with embarrassment because you didn’t know you could make a sound like that. You fell from your peak, relaxing in Jaehyun’s hold; it felt like you were floating amongst the clouds in an almost euphoric way.

“I don’t like Jaemin,” you breathed out, still winded from your orgasm, “you fucking idiot.”

“I know.” Jaehyun pulled his fingers out of you, eyes trained on you as he licked them slowly. The look on his face was more gentle now. With his free hand, he brushed loose strands of your hair out of your face. “You like me now.”

“No, I’ve loved you for a while now.” You didn’t know what possessed you to say what was on your mind, but it surprised you more than it surprised Jaehyun. “I didn’t realize it then but… I think I did.”

Love? Love?

You thought you knew what love was. Something that you felt in your bones, that burst within you instantly. Simple glances, thoughts, and daydreams—something gentle and fluffy, but also emotionally shattering. You thought it was tender smiles, kind words, and little gestures.

But maybe that was the kind of love that led to puffy eyes, tear-stained cheeks, and hoarse voices. The kind of love that was left fruitless with an empty gap in your chest.

Maybe this was different.

It was instinctive, the way you fell for him. Like an effortless intake of breath, you were in love before you even knew it. You always thought love was a monster. Ravaging, scraping, foul monsters with jaws so immeasurably large that they would have swallowed you whole. But maybe it wasn’t the tragedy you made it out to be.

With Jaehyun it was fierce and maddening and made you want to rip your hair out. It was a violent hurricane that you tried to brave your way through. But you were blind. You were already at the eye; you had always been at the center without realizing it. And, despite all the pointless arguments and name-calling, it was the most beautiful thing you had experienced.

Yeah, you liked him. You liked how you were around him, despite how much you complained about it to Mark. Part of you refused to admit it, but sometimes the bickering was fun. You realized that you never let go of Jaehyun before because you couldn’t. You simply didn’t want to be without him because Jeong Jaehyun drove a deeper passion within you.

Your rose-tinted loving moment was ruined as soon as a shit-eating grin spread across Jaehyun’s face.

“You love me.”

“I’ll kill you.”

“You love me,” Jaehyun echoed as if he was internalizing the information. “You love me.”

“I take it back,” you said flatly. “I hate you, I hate you, and I’ve always hated you.”

Jaehyun ignored your words, his cockiness morphing into adoration. “You actually love me back.” He cupped your face in his hands, eyes turning into little crescents as he smiled. “Even though I called you a cougar for liking a guy a year younger than you?”

“Yes.”

“Even though I made fun of you wearing a push-up bra in front of him?”

You clenched your jaw. “Yes.”

“Even though I asked Johnny about you and he told me that I still live in your mind, rent-free?”

“What? Johnny said that?” you exclaimed, eyes wide. You grimaced. Johnny would be dealt with later. You placed your hands on Jaehyun’s shoulders and made direct eye contact. “Look, Jaehyun—as much as it hurts me to say this and I’d rather tear out my vocal cords—I like you. I like you so much that I don’t care about the petty shit you pulled when I liked Jaemin because frankly, I don’t care about Jaemin anymore.”

“That was the hottest thing I’ve ever heard.”

You wanted to slap him.

“Are you just constantly horny?” you snapped. “I’m pouring out my feelings to you here!”

“I’m better at expressing my love through actions, not words,” Jaehyun explained. “Can I show you?”

“Is this another ploy to get in my pants?”

“No, I’m asking you out on a date,” he said. “Sneak out with me tonight. I want to explore the city with you.”

The offer was tempting. In fact, you found no reason to be opposed to the idea. After all, you were always down for an adventure in the city. Jaehyun being with you didn’t sound too bad either, especially when Seoul was so lively at night. Part of you wanted it purely to catch up on all the time you missed when you stopped being friends.

“Fine,” you agreed. “An hour after curfew.”

“Great.” Jaehyun flashed a grin that slowly curled into a smirk. “Now let me get in your pants.”

“Are you kidding?”

“Y/N, you see,” Jaehyun started, “I don’t hate you, but you’ve really pissed me off these past two years. We have all of this pent-up rage, so it’s only fair that we let it out on each other.” His grip on your hips tightened.

You loathed yourself for wanting him, and for putting aside the fear of being walked in on for him. You internally cringed at the thought of Mark accidentally bearing witness, and you weren’t sure you were willing to explain the situation to him just yet.

It was the price you paid for carnality, you supposed.

You sighed in a forced way so that you sounded reluctant and bored. Unfortunately, your plan backfired and you ended up feeling bad when a concerned look crossed Jaehyun’s face.

“If you’re worried about getting caught, I’ll just cover you,” Jaehyun mumbled, the softness of his voice almost putting you at ease.

You rolled your eyes. “How kind of you.” You paused and looked up at him. “Are we really going to have sex for the first time here?”

Jaehyun looked around him. “Well, I guess we could go to the hotel room if—”

“Nope!” you interrupted, wrapping your arms around his neck and drawing him closer to you. “Let’s do it here. I love the pool, love having sex at the pool.”

He rose a brow at you, hands making their way down your body. Suddenly, your realization of being completely exposed had heightened, and you pressed your thighs together. Maybe it was because your vulnerability showed on your face, clear as day, but Jaehyun smirked, further flustering you by tugging down his swim shorts to reveal his hardened cock.

It was heavy and warm against your thigh, but what you were fixed on was the v-line on his pelvis. You traced along the bone, making him shiver under your touch. You were shocked when he grabbed your wrist tightly, holding it away from him.

“You’re playing a dangerous game here,” he growled. Jaehyun leaned closer and nipped at the shell of your earlobe, chuckling as you tensed up under his hold. His hot breath made you squirm under his grip.

Have you ever noticed how insanely attractive he was? Yes, of course. You weren’t an idiot.

Have you ever appreciated his beauty until now? Probably not.

“Just fuck me already, Jae,” you grumbled out as he pushed you down onto the deck of the pool.

In seconds, Jaehyun grabbed your hips and pulled them to his waist. Without any preamble, he rammed himself inside of you. The motion caught you by surprise and you cried out, half out of pleasure and half out of pain. You were definitely wet from being fingered earlier, but two fingers were nothing compared to Jaehyun’s cock.

Seeing his cock disappear in you was enough to make you whimper. Your walls clenched around him, pulsating at the foreign feeling. You were tempted to slap him upside the head for going so fast, but all you could do was tug at his hair and wrap your legs around him.

“You bastard, I’ll fucking—oh.”

Jaehyun laughed cruelly at your reaction, partly to cover up the groan caught in his throat and partly because your attempts at being mad at him were downright pathetic. When you had adjusted to his size, Jaehyun grunted and pounded in you, hitting spots that made your limbs feel like jelly. As if that wasn’t enough, Jaehyun found your clit with the hand that didn’t have a bruising grip on your waist and pressed harshly against it.

“You’re so fucking tight,” Jaehyun gritted out.

“T-then be gentle,” you bargained, drowning in a molten sea.

Jaehyun narrowed his eyes at you. “Have you ever fucking heard of gentle hate sex?” he asked, validating his point with a particularly hard thrust.

Your fingernails dug into his back, leaving hot-white trails down his skin. You were certain you had drawn blood, but knowing Jaehyun, he’d probably feel proud if he saw it. He brought his lips to your neck as you writhed under him, biting around until he found your sweet spot. This wasn’t fair; he was pleasuring you in every way possible and all you could do was cry out as he pummeled in you.

You closed your eyes, sparks flying behind your eyelids as you felt your release rushing to you.

Then, he slowed his strokes down considerably.

“Look at me,” he ordered in a rasp. Your eyes fluttered open, remaining half-lidded as you felt like you were going to spill over. “Look at me when I’m fucking you.”

He slapped his hips against yours again, the sound of skin against skin making you shudder. Jaehyun filled you up to the brim and you were oh-so-close to letting go and falling off the edge. The hardscape was cool but you were on fire, bliss overtaking all of your senses. Your toes curled as you held onto his damp skin for dear life, not sure if it was because he was in the pool or he was sweating due to the heat you both emanated.

“R-right there!” you wailed. “Fuck, right there!”

Jaehyun angled his hips slightly to pound into you, causing you to see metaphysical stars. It was so hard to keep eye contact with him when your eyes just wanted to roll back. Jaehyun let out a groan by your ear, low and guttural. You didn’t even notice how tight the grip he has on you until he releases your hip for you to see the print he left.

You could tell he was close, but he wanted to hold on for you. Both of your breaths were labored as you stared into each other’s eyes, your body moving up and down against the hardscape as Jaehyun railed you. You tightened your grip on him, a pathetic moan falling from your lips as you were falling over the edge.

Jaehyun understood and fucked you through your orgasm, making sure you made the most of it. Warmth blossomed under your skin as you cried out in pure bliss, your vision blurring and refocusing as it flickered from normal to pure white as you rode out your high. You ground yourself back to reality after nearly sobbing out his name, the pleasure overwhelming you. Jaehyun’s eyes went hazy as he fell apart right after you did, and soon, you felt something warm spill inside of you.

Jaehyun finished inside of you and stuttered out a curse as he pulled out of you. He rolled over and laid on the deck of the pool next to you, the both of you catching your breath like you had just run a marathon.

“I have a cute date idea for tonight,” Jaehyun said after a long pause.

You looked over, watching his chest rise and fall. “Yeah?”

“We go to the store and buy Plan B.”

You couldn’t even disagree.

“Sounds good.”

Jaehyun dragged himself off the floor, muttering something along the lines of “shit, that felt good” to himself as he reached for his swim trunks to pull back on. You grabbed a towel to dry yourself off, but pins and needles shot up your legs when you tried to walk. Jaehyun noticed immediately and a smug look settled on his face again, not the least bit remorseful.

You scowled as you slipped your clothes back on. “Shut up,” you jeered. “You’re so shameless for someone who can’t pull out.”

“Oops,” he replied flatly.

“I hate you, Jaehyun.”

Jaehyun ran a hand through his damp hair, letting out a laugh as he shook his head. He picked up another towel from the chairs by the poolside and wrapped it around so it covered your head. You bit your lip as you watched him attempt to dry your hair. It was times like these when he seemed so gentle and delicate, unlike his usual irritating attitude.

“You liked it, though,” Jaehyun said. “Right?”

You faltered, looking down at your feet as he continued to dry your hair. “Yeah.”

Jaehyun smiled softly and leaned in swiftly to peck your lips, but your moment was interrupted by the sound of a door opening.

Mark was gaping at you two, eyelids fluttering rapidly as if he was trying to blink away what he had just seen.

“Y/N? Jeong Jaehyun?” Mark questioned, his voice an octave higher than usual. Realization crossed his face through a series of facial expressions that morphed far too quickly for you to process. “You’ve got to be kidding me.”

“Mark!” You and Jaehyun pulled away from each other quickly.

Mark paused to think his words through. “Did I almost walk in on a murder?”

You let out a frustrated groan. “Jesus, Mark, if you’re not going to read the room, at least SparkNote it.”

“Wait, so you were kissing?”

“No, we didn’t kiss,” Jaehyun assured, and you felt tricked for feeling relieved for a split second. “We actually had sex.”

Jaehyun’s words ended with a splutter as you elbowed him in the gut. Mark looked between the two of you, boggled. You nudged Jaehyun again with your foot, signaling for him to leave so you could handle Mark. Thankfully, he took your cue this time and grabbed his towel, mockingly saluting the both of you. You were stupid to think you were safe, though, because Jaehyun had to get another last word in before he walked off.

“See you tonight, Y/N.”

There was a long, awkward pause while Jaehyun opened the door and left the building. You and Mark were staring at each other but neither of you knew what to say or how to approach the subject.

“I just… I just came here to find you, and Jaemin told me you went to the pool. You…” Mark started. He looked absolutely horrified, like a corpse had fallen to his feet—no, rather, he looked like a corpse himself, like someone attempted to do taxidermy on him but did a shit job. “Bitch.”

“Let me explain.”

“Bitch,” Mark enunciated, “you just fucked the hottest guy here, oh my god.”

Definitely not the reaction you were expecting, but you supposed it wasn’t a bad one. You were glad he wasn’t getting into the whole ‘why didn’t you tell me? I’m your best friend’ rant, but this was equally as overwhelming.

Mark continued, “Wait—is that why you were late this morning? Oh my god, this has been a thing. You’ve been hooking up with him in secret, haven’t you?”

“No? Well, yes, but it hasn’t been much until, um”—you gestured awkwardly around you—“you know.”

“So you were the one who was with Jaehyun last night?”

“Yes.”

“And this morning before I picked you up?”

“Yes.”

“Are you two dating now?”

“Honestly, I really don't know,” you admitted. “Mark, please don’t tell anyone about this. Especially not those little shits, Chenle and Johnny.”

Mark gulped. “About that…”

Before you could question him, there was a chorus of loud clapping echoing from the locker rooms which was then followed by a few cheers. You grimaced as the two boys you didn’t want to see walked out: Chenle and Johnny, Tweedledee and Tweedledum themselves. They both wore cocky smirks as they shook their head at you, which made Mark a touch more nervous than he was before.

“Have anything to say for yourself, Y/N?” Chenle teased.

“Go to hell.” You scoffed and turned to Mark, narrowing in on him. “Why’d you bring them along? What are you? The three stooges?”

“We were looking for you so we could invite you to the movie night we were having in Jungwoo’s room!” Mark defended. “I swear, if I knew about you and Jaehyun, I never would’ve brought them along.”

You sighed deeply as Chenle snickered to himself. “Well, I guess Y/N can’t come to movie night since she has a date with—hold on, what did you call him again? The devil?”

“Okay, I get it!” You threw your hands up in defeat, eyes closed to show you were reflecting upon your actions. “I’m a dirty hypocrite and I’ve committed a crime worse than death.” You opened your eyes again. “I’m sorry.” To your surprise, Chenle and Johnny had their right hand up. You stared at it, puzzled. “Do you want me to make an oath or something?”

“In modern society,” Johnny explained, “we call it a high-five.”

It took you a few seconds to process their words before you tentatively gave them each a firm high-five. You blinked up at them before ease washed over you. This was how it always was, anyways. At the end of the day, no matter how much you guys bickered or teased each other, you always made up. That's what friends were for, after all.

“There we go,” you said, oddly satisfied. “For now, I’ll let go of the fact that Johnny snitched on me to Jaehyun behind my back.”

“How dare you!” Johnny gasped. “Chenle was with me.”

Chenle raised his hand to confirm the statement. “Indeed. Please give credit where it's due.”

“Alright, fuck you both.”

What the fuck even was a date?

This was foreign territory to you, but even so, you decided you wouldn’t rely on your annoying friends. First of all, you were sure they wouldn’t really be of any help and just endlessly tease you about it. Secondly, they were simply going to gradually grow more stressed (Mark), lecherous (Johnny), and aggravating (Chenle). Thus, you decided to slay the monster of first dates yourself.

Your first hurdle was looking cute. You packed absolutely nothing that wasn’t for the training camp, so you had already failed. Jaehyun was going to have to deal with you in your gym shorts and a school t-shirt.

Your second hurdle was sneaking away from Eunha, your roommate. That was a piece of cake considering how she didn’t exactly care. When you headed out of the room, wallet and phone in hand, she wished you a kind farewell, which you returned.

Your third hurdle was sneaking out of the hotel. You weren’t quite sure how you and Jaehyun made it outside without being spotted, but you were certain he must have tipped off some of the staff because there was no way the both of you could have walked straight out of the lobby without being reported. When you asked him, though, he said it was probably because you looked like the cleaning lady.

Needless to say, Jaehyun was on thin ice.

You loved Seoul, loved the dirty of it. Even at night, the city was alive and full of vigor, full of young people like you who were chasing cheap thrills. Jaehyun was a dream under the glowing lights, and you almost couldn’t believe that the prince-like boy was head-over-heels for you.

He took you to a wide alley with a night market, full of life and energy. Jaehyun was walking through the crowd and you were following right behind him, like some awkward fish swimming after a cuter, more popular fish upstream. There were several times where you almost lost yourself in the crowd, and Jaehyun noticed this. He reached behind him, still shouldering his way through the crowd, and grabbed your hand. The smell of spicy rice cakes, the numerous pop-up bars lining the alley, and Jeong Jaehyun gripping your hand—it all made a pretty eventful first date.

Jaehyun didn’t kiss you. Not once. He didn’t try to touch you anywhere that would have tempted you both into doing something you definitely shouldn’t do in public. There were times where Jaehyun turned pink or looked away from you shyly, and you indulged in it because this was a side of him you didn’t see often.

Jaehyun stopped at a convenience store before you both decided to head back. You waited outside for him, kicking stones as you thought of him. He was undeniably perfect, which you somewhat despised because you had spent the last two years hating his guts and this was an abrupt change. You were worried if he was buying you something; he had already bought you lamb skewers and rice cakes at the night market. You didn’t want to be the girlfriend to empty his wallet.

Wait—

Were you his girlfriend?

“Y/N,” he called when he walked out of the store, holding something behind his back with a sneaky grin. “Close your eyes.”

You bit back a smile and closed your eyes, holding your hands out. He placed the object in your hands and it felt light, so you were sure it shouldn’t have cost much. Although, your stomach was pitted with guilt at the thought of him spending money on you. You opened your eyes when he directed you to.

Plan B One-Step.

You no longer felt bad for him.

“Very romantic,” you observed, putting the packet in your wallet, “but thank you.”

You were seething. Your face grew unconditionally hot and you had to look down at your feet. It seriously pissed you off that your feelings were so clear right now because Jaehyun had bought you fucking Plan B.

Jaehyun seemed to notice right away and tilted your chin up with two fingers, chuckling. “Is something wrong?”

Your face screwed up when you decided on what you were going to ask him. “Are we dating?” you blurted out.

Jaehyun held your face gently like it would shatter if he applied any more pressure. His fingertips grazed the hinge of your jaw while his thumbs rested on your cheekbones. You were panicking when he leaned in, but it wasn’t what you expected. Jaehyun pressed a chaste kiss to your nose, grinning at your reaction. You reached up to trace his dimple with your finger.

“Do you want to be my girlfriend, Y/N?”

“Yeah,” you admitted, flustered beyond imagination, but you had already gotten this far so you continued, “do you?”

“Do I want to be your girlfriend?”

You wanted to hit yourself. “Fuck. I mean, do you wanna date me?”

“Of course,” he said with a laugh. “I’ve been waiting for this for so long.”

He drew you into his warm embrace and you buried your face into his chest, wondering how you hated this man for so long. Of course, when those cocky smirks and impish looks came back, you were sure you’d remember again. But right now, in his arms, you just knew that you wanted to be with him. You looked up at him, arms slung around him, and got on your toes to press a gentle kiss to his lips.

You were positive you hadn’t ever seen Jeong Jaehyun blush before tonight, but it was a sight you were sure you could never get sick of.

And you never would.

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