#that or im finally dying in a fun new ways doctors will not have a name for

[archi-pelago]

.

[bluebipples]

i saw a tiktok recently (from one of my fav creators on there lol) where he basically responding to the discourse about movie theatre/concert etiquette and how 'people forgot' how to act after the pandemic in those situations, and he was basically like, 'yeah, no shit, a lot of us just basically came to terms w the fact that at any moment, we can die, and life is very finite,' etc.

like damn yea he's got a point. most of the kids who went to school during the pandemic had to go through a chunk of the high school/middle school/elementary school cycle years in a semi-controversial, totally new way for both students and teachers. (at least that's how it was in philly where I live, and most of the east coast that i know of lol)

they spent those formative years hearing adults argue that some humans do not deserve equal rights, some doctors are liars, etc. some of them couldn't visit actual dying relatives in their final days, some of them came close to death themselves, and the entire time they had to listen to people argue over what kind of medical science was accurate and what news is fake. so much ridiculous bs i genuinely can't blame them - or anybody - for no longer giving a shit about going on their phone during a fuckin concert. because quite literally, at this point, everything we as humans do, to some weird portion of the population, is a luxury we do not deserve simply because they think we are born to suffer and work.

like, i know we've been saying 'im sick of living thru huge events' but you gotta admit, over the past, what, 2 years we've all just kind of collectively accepted that not only will it get worse, but the possibility of it being entirely life-ending is very real. i mean, we all kinda lowkey knew that we might live through some intense, near-apocalyptic shit, but now we're not exactly resigned to it. we're just kind of collectively pissed off enough that it's like we're holding our breaths, waiting for something bigger than ourselves to happen, and in the meantime we've just kinda stopped caring what everybody else thinks.

so anyway, fuck it, go on ur phones during concerts, check ur messages during that 5 minute quiet scene in a movie (as long as ur brightness is low and ur sound is off), dress like ur in a victorian movie, buy that cool thing (as long as u can at least feed urself/pay most of ur bills after), do the fun stuff. life is too short to not be sick of the bullshit

(but fr, if u really need to go on ur phone during a movie, just get those screen protectors that dim your screen unless you're looking directly at it. i get the need to fidget or do something w ur hands, sometimes u need to look away during some scenes, that's totally fine and there are lots of ways u can do this without having a literal square beam of sunlight to burn everyone's retinas. those sceen protector thingies are like $9 on amazon but at like 5 below they're abt $5 i think)

[beepmeepmeepbeep]

i think how torchwood actually should have gone is well. following the doctor who model, people do have to leave, and it's darker so they should die (already so established that they cant just choose to leave martha-style).

and it feels like gwen, being the audience substitute should not die? but that is a replaceable role. im alright with s1-2 gwen but s3 and esp s4 is where her character really hits for me. i wouldnt want to lose that. she gets so hardened to the world (while still managing to keep some of her heart. but yeah torchwood does wreck it slightly. it's torchwood). she could also take on a jack-like role (jack plays the doctor role in torchwood - gwen taking it on would be akin to the doctor's regeneration)

realistically, i think ianto should have died instead of owen. he dies very soon after anyway. and owen's literally just had a whole arc of accepting his undead state and how he cant die only to immediately die. plus the walking corpse thing is fun. so yes ianto and tosh die.

so i think how i would write it (if it had carried on with the s1&2 format) is ianto dies, end of s2. this distresses jack, the way it does in children of earth and he leaves. gwen is left to run torchwood with tosh and owen. she takes on a more jackesque role. they recruit one or two new people, maybe andy, maybe kathy swanson, maybe someone completely new. tosh or owen dies at the end of this series (i'm fine with owen dying here, once there's been more of a chance to play around with the living corpse thing. if tosh dies, by this point her character arc has been more completed, though probably not all the way. both can die, or just one, i don't really mind)

jack returns for s4. he takes back his role, but gwen doesnt want to give it up easily. theres a lot of tension this time round. they recruit one or two more people. if tosh or owen are still alive, they die.

s5 would be the same team. i think miracle day is a good plot, but i would probably simplify it majorly, and have it as a three part series finale. all the current team members die this series, apart from gwen. jack, haunted by his past, and newfound fear of mortality, plus the death of his friends, leaves once again.

then theres a hiatus. several years go by before the next series starts. in it we find a new person, stumbling across torchwood for the first time. through this we realise gwen has kept torchwood going, but has almost completely lost her "heart". she has completely taken on jack's role. the torchwood team is small, two or three people when the new audience surrogate stumbles across them. this starting episode + beginning of s6 would function in a way people could enter this series without having watched any of the previous ones (this is a massive bonus to doctor who imo, abd torchwood should realise this and utilize it)

theres also a episode in this series involving suzie once again. this only serves to fully demonstrate how much gwen has changed, how much she has become jack.

[kenmaiid]

🌳 Levi minecraft headcanons 🌳

im sorry but the hold Levi and Minecraft have on me needs to be studied by doctors and taught as a cautionary tale in universities or something idk why it makes me so giddy. anyways-

-levi’s the type to play really long sessions of Minecraft all at once before never touching the game again for like months at a time. He’s hardcore invested in one sitting but after awhile other games call for his attention, and it’s usually the level grinding dungeon types (doesn’t mean he still doesn’t adore the peace getting lost in his silly little block world brings)

-obviously he’s decked out in the strongest armor and weapons, he knows all about potion making and he’s a wiz with using redstone 🙄 we get it you game

-he ‘beat’ the game a very long time ago, but he mostly just likes the familiar routine of mining and creating and doing this and that. he doesn’t own that many worlds honestly, he’s dedicated to having a few survival worlds and just one or two for creative mode to build things.

-He’d only ever make a new world if he wanted to play with a new group of ppl and start fresh. Building a little community where everyone still sort of does their own thing is fun that way. Or it would be if he could get more of his brothers to play with him

-Leviathan used to play a ton with Mammon before Mammon started annoying him in-game too much hfkfdkfd

-it was always little things like always asking for his extra tools and never replenishing the supplies later, or Mammon would crash at his house all the time or constantly lead mobs to Levi’s place. (he used to step on Levi’s crops for awhile too on accident)

“S’not my fault that damn creeper blew my place up.” Mammon says matter-of-factly. “Just go make a new bed.” Levi groans tiredly. “I gave you wool awhile back.” “Yea! And then I died! And you went an turned off the keep-items-after-death option. So what the hell else am I s’posed to do!” Levi can practically hear Mammon shrugging. ”But it’s not a true gaming experience if you don’t have a complete shutdown after mining and mining and mining for nearly hours and end up getting a ton of super rare supplies, only to meet your ultimately fate by getting accidentally killed by a mob. Or falling off a deep pit into a chasm of lava on accident, or dying in the stupidest way possible and losing every single thing you own and immediately feeling like you want to break everything.” Levi quickly spouts off. There’s silence on the other line for awhile before Mammon quietly says. “Y’know what... maybe you should take a break.” (Mammon also ended up selling his own personal computer for extra money once so he just *does not* play things at all anymore. Hand games like card and checkers are more his thing, but anyways that left Levi without a minecraft buddy unless he wanted to play with online friends)

-Levi tried to recruit Barbatos to play since they used to play games here and there sometimes but Barbatos absolutely refused. The butler more or less said something that hinted at him thinking the game seemed a bit too silly for his own personal tastes and Levi only begged him 4 more times to play with him before completely dropping it

-Levi tried to recruit Lucifer as a last option but it was just so ridiculous seeing his little block avatar in game and trying to instruct him that he couldn't go through with it anymore. They agreed to never speak of it afterwards

-He introduced the game to Diavolo one day, but playing with the Young Prince is so rare that he has to completely reintroduce the controls and the mechanics of the game e v e r y single time they can finally arrange something.

Not only that but he has to juggle having the Prince on call at the same time, and it is absolutely terrible trying to explain controls over call. Levi’s much better at showing Dia in person what needs to be pressed.

Diavolo follows him around aimlessly for most of it, just enjoying the graphics and being amused at the block-like animals. He vaguely wonders if they can arrange for some creatures from the Devildom to be put into the game. it does not work like that but Levi mentions that he can probably mod Cerberus into the game. all the coding talk is lost on Diavolo but he’s happy nonetheless!

-Levi probably has the highest speedrun record in the Devildom when it comes to this game... *cough cough* loser *cough*

[gamerwoo]

[Tales from the Pack] Joshua: Second Chance (Part One)

Characters: Joshua x female reader

Genre/warnings: werewolf au, fantasy, angst, possible character death, a little bit of fluff but it’s like angsty fluff

Word count: 1,837

Summary: After his mate died, Joshua always blamed himself and never wanted to imprint again. However, fate has other ideas when he meets you: a young, energetic werecoyote that’s quite the opposite of him. He insists he doesn’t want a new mate – nobody’s even sure if he’s ready for a new one – but he can’t ignore his instincts.

Next | Second Chance Masterlist

a/n: things in bold are in english. BUT MOST IMPORTANTLY!!!! hi i know everyone has been awaiting this series from tftp in particular. and while i wish i could say im updating this regularly,,,,,i cannot. there’s no definite update schedule, im just doing it when i can. i wanted to wait until i had all the parts written but im impatient. but i hope you’ll enjoy this series even with the slow updates, and i hope it lives up to expectations 💜

“Where’re we going?” Joshua grumbled as he followed slightly behind Hansol and Kyung, the younger boy’s hand wrapped around hers.

Joshua was going with them to the doctor without actually knowing. Kyung knew better than to tell him before they left because she figured the grumpy werewolf would just tell her no, not really caring whether he was unable to heal or not -- even though that was very clearly a bad sign that he had overexerted himself.

Kyung thought maybe Joshua would be a little less...angry all the time once she got to know him, but Joshua was stubborn well before he’d even met her -- he was just bad at shoving his stubbornness and anger down.

“I promised I’d get my back fixed if Kyung decided to stay, and you said you’d go if I went, didn’t you?” Hansol reminded his brother with a smirk over his shoulder. “We’re gonna go see that doctor we were told about. What was her name again?”

“Minjee,” Kyung replied. “Not to sound rude but...Josh, why don’t you want to see a doctor?”

“I don’t really care if I can heal or not either way,” he replied flatly, “but I said I’d get help if Hansol did. So...here we are.”

“Here we are...” she repeated in a mumble.

Joshua simply followed the mated couple in silence as the alpha led them to Minjee’s, being the first to knock on the door. It was a girl -- as expected -- that opened the door, bowing politely to the group before smiling brightly at the darker skinned girl in front of them.

“Kyung!” she exclaimed as she gestured the three of them in. “I haven’t seen you in so long -- I suppose that’s a good thing, though. How’ve you been? Your pack hasn’t mentioned you.”

“I’m not actually in that pack anymore,” Kyung told her with a shrug, her ‘cool’ exterior coming back in the presence of an old friend. “I’m an alpha of my mate’s pack now.”

Minjee seemed impressed, eyebrows raising with a smile, “Wow, look at you. How’d the sudden change happen? Jiung must be proud.”

“He’s actually...passed away.”

The doctor’s face fell, placing a comforting hand on your upper arm, “I’m sorry for the loss of your brother.”

Kyung nodded, “I’ve been grieving, but it’s been easier with my mate. Minjee, this is Hansol, and his brother -- er, our brother, I guess -- Joshua.”

“It’s nice to meet you,” Hansol said as he nodded to her. “Our brother, Soonyoung came in before with a human girl to talk about fixing us -- I’ve got silver burned into my back, and Joshua’s the healer that can’t heal anymore.”

“Ah, yes, the healer!” Minjee’s eyes lit up as she nodded excitedly. She looked to Joshua now. “Your power still hasn’t come back?”

“No,” he replied. “I thought just resting would help but...nothing.”

“I see,” she hummed, eyeing him over before looking back at Kyung like she was their mother that took them to the doctor’s office. “I’ll do a quick look over and then see what I can do. It’s almost time for me to close up, and I have to go out of town for a few days. I won’t be able to do anything until about a week from now, but they’ll be fine until then if they’ve been fine this long.”

“That’s okay,” Hansol shrugged as Joshua replied, “No worries.”

“Alright,” Minjee breathed with a warm smile, grabbing some gloves from nearby, “then let’s get started and see what’s going on.”

-

Even though you were never careful, you wanted to blame this on shitty luck. You were too carefree and excitable, so you ran and ran and didn’t see the trap. So with you trapped under a net with little prickles that you were sure were laced with wolfsbane from how fucking awful you felt -- that was an understatement -- all you could do was wait for hunters to come find you before death took you itself. Honestly, you hoped the latter would come first.

You faintly heard footsteps coming toward you as your vision went out of focus, your eyelids becoming too heavy to keep up. You sensed a presence beside you, the body crouching down to get a better look at you.

“What do we have here?” a female-sounding voice asked, but it sounded far away and muffled to you. “Is this another werewolf?”

“I can’t tell,” another female voice replied in a sigh. “Sura, do you have any ideas?”

“Doesn’t smell like werewolf to me,” a male voice said. “It definitely is some kind of were-creature, though. This thing wreaks of wolfsbane and it’s clearly affecting her. I’d say...coyote, maybe?”

One of the women sucked in a breath between their teeth before saying, “Prajya, help me get this net off of her -- it’ll be heavy but I’m afraid to let Sura touch it.”

Slowly, you felt the weight of the net being lifted off of you. You could also feel every little barb stuck in you being pulled out, and you whimpered softly from the stinging pain that covered your body.

“Minjee, will she make it?” the second girl asked as you were lifted into warm arms.

“No,” the male replied, “probably not.”

“The house isn’t far from here,” the first girl insisted. “We just have to hurry.”

But you were out cold before they even took the first step.

-

Josh and Hansol weren’t really sure why so many people wanted to go with them into town that night for them to finally get fixed. Suvi was understandable since she just enjoyed going into town, and Soomin made sense since she was basically their resident know-it-all when it came to werewolves. However, Wonwoo wanting to tag along was weird because Wonwoo didn’t like leaving the house, much less going into town. They figured maybe it was because he wanted to make sure Soomin would be alright, but she was already going to be with two werewolves and a girl who had gone into town plenty of times. She was in good hands, but whatever made Wonwoo happy.

“Are you nervous?” Suvi wondered, looking up between Hansol and Joshua as she walked.

“I don’t know how they’re going to fix my back, so that’s a little concerning,” Hansol decided, “but I’m more excited.”

Joshua just shrugged, “Eh, not really.”

“Try not to be so excited, huh,” Wonwoo commented.

Joshua did like his power. He liked that he was able to help people with it. However, it didn’t benefit him -- as in, it didn’t make his own personal healing any better than anybody else’s in the pack -- and it wouldn’t be needed if his pack wasn’t so stupid and got themselves hurt. It wasn’t fun like Seokmin’s or Chan’s or Kyung’s, and it wasn’t interesting like Jihoon’s or Soonyoung’s or Hansol’s or Minghao’s. It was boring -- kind of like Wonwoo’s or Seungcheol’s.

Suvi was the first up to the door, knocking before she took a step back to wait. The door was answered by Minjee -- as always -- who greeted them with an almost pained smile.

“Hello,” she greeted them. “Before you come in, I’d like to apologize. My partners and I have just gotten home, and one of our patients... Well, she won’t make it.”

Now that she’d mentioned it, the wolves could just barely hear the faint, slowing heartbeat from inside the house. But they could also smell that it wasn’t the typical werewolf. It was something they’d never smelled before, but it still wasn’t completely human.

Joshua also picked up on a scent that was very familiar but also so very different from anything he’d smelled before.

“We’re just trying to ease her pain until she passes,” Minjee continued, letting the small group into the house. She turned to look at somebody else who was helping with the aforementioned girl. “Sura, could you put a curtain up around her? Prajya, I’ll need you to help me with--”

Minjee stopped when she noticed Joshua stop in the doorway, his body going rigid. His golden eyes were spotting red and locked on you, hands balled into fists.

You were dying; his mate was dying. Again.

“Josh...?” Wonwoo spoke up, placing a hand on the older boy’s shoulder.

Joshua’s thoughts and opinions on re-imprinting were out the window when it registered that the girl quickly losing her life was his mate. The only thing he could focus on was you and saving you -- but he only knew one way how.

“She’s not dying,” he stated, walking straight through the small crowd and over to you where your pulse was just a moment away from completely dying out.

“What?” Minjee asked, watching him as he approached you with a set jaw and narrowed eyes.

“I’m not going to let her die,” he said louder, letting his hands hover above your body.

Joshua was too focused on trying to somehow get his powers to come back to him that he wasn’t paying any attention to Hansol and Wonwoo’s conversation over their surprise of their brother imprinting for a second time. Truthfully, nobody thought anybody would come after Lilly since Josh was so against it. But then again, imprinting wasn’t something any werewolf could control. 

Joshua mumbled to himself as he tried to will his power back. He was concentrating so hard but nothing was happening. No faint glow from his palms, no color coming back to your face, and your heartbeat was still rapidly decreasing by the second. It wouldn’t be long until it was gone all together, and then there would be nothing he could do.

“C’mon...c’mon...” he grumbled, closing his eyes as his eyebrows creased together in concentration.

“Your powers won’t suddenly work,” Minjee spoke up, watching from where she stood by his pack, wanting to give the werewolf space -- especially since she was preparing for him to be grieving for the mate he’d lose before actually having her.

“They have to!” he snapped.

He refused to lose you. If he lost two mates -- even if he didn’t properly meet or know you -- he was sure he wouldn’t be able to take it.

With his last bit of energy he had in his body, his palms faintly glowed to life, spreading a tingling warmth across your body. His healing power was starting to cleanse the wolfsbane from your system, and your heartbeat was starting to become stronger and more stable. Hearing your heartbeat louder in his ears made Josh want to cry. But he didn’t have the energy for it.

As you let out a cough and a girl with brown skin rushed over to sit you up so you could empty your system, Joshua collapsed onto the floor, knowing you were alive and would hopefully stay alive. He put his everything into saving you, and he didn’t know if that would kill him, but he knew it was worth it.

[p1nkwitch]

Hi! How did you enjoy Loki show?

I liked it in general, like Loki is one of my favourite characters of al the mcu. The first two episdoes? Amaizing. Chapter 5 with the variants? I loved it, im still feeling grief for OldLoki, also what about kid loki??? Why is no one thinking about my son!! He lost his only parental figure!!!

But back on track, it was about Loki until Sylvie appeared, which mind you she is an awesome character? But

She is not Loki, you could literally replace her as an original character who has magic and it would have been the same thing. She is so far removed from being a Loki that the only thing connecting them is magic and asgard.

Also why was everyone in story pushing the idea of romance between them? Like my dudes they have been around each other for 24 hours give or take!! What???? Thats insane!!

I love the character growth for Loki, but it feels kind of weird, it would go more in line with the version of him that died during the thanos attack on the ship. He just got back from losing to the avengers and yes im a believer of the mind stone manipulating him partially during it. So yes it could have been that, but it just sort of feels weird. Like i would love to have seen his struggles with losing his timeline, or heaven forbids TALK ABOUT HIS BROTHER???

Why is marvel agaisnt the odinbros being siblings??? You dont even have to show him, just talk about him!

Its a very interesting series, i love the theme of alternate universes, timelines, the idea of free will based on a preconstructed world!!

The world building it there and its great! Hell the final episode, if you take out the whole kiss thing? It was marvelous and it sets out the door for the new phase, but thats... basically it, it was a plot device to move the story. If it went like the first two episodes went and delved deeper into Loki and then reached that part i would have been dying inside.

I have hope for the second season, i know they would never do him justice, god knows i know. But its nice to be able to see Loki, with any hope he can get Mobious back and finally have an actual friend!!!

Also Ravona dissapearing at the end? Saying she is looking for free will? that was so interesting, she was terrible, but it was understandable to her situation.

Same with Kang holy shit charismatic bastard that he was, it was his own fault that the multiversal war even started.

So yes, i liked it, could it have been better? Sure, sure, but i want to know what happens next. Im looking at the Doctors Strange and the Multiverse of madness with anticipation.

I have gotten used to marvel dissapointing me, so it just doesnt surprise me. It was fun, i liked the way it was heading the first few episodes. The Lokies in 5 ? I love them and i wish they bring back kid Loki. Poor little man he is alone with croki now :(

The idea of a multiversal collapse? God i want to see it, i go rabid at talks regarding timelines and multiverses. I just have a lot of feelings about it.

Timelines, cosmic horrors and mutiverses are my fucking jam and i would talk for hours about it.

Just to recap! I liked it, would like to see Loki develop in his ownn show for sure one day. But i had fun watching it. For me to actually hate on something it would have to be the biggest dissapointment, but Loki more or less did well.

[thousandsunnywrites]

Mister Sun

⤷ ficlet

part 1 |  part 2

Ace x f!reader; romantic

⤷ synopsis: The only way to calm yourself down was by listening to Mister Sun by Barney. Sounds cute right? Don’t be a clown. This is a n g s t.

⤷ word count: 1,6k

⤷ a/n: aHHHHH heres my comeback from my hiatus 😎hope y’all liked it, i was writing when it was 4 AM and i downtripped to lots of sad songs, remembering how good and youthful life was before I became a boring old hag. das all folks, lemme know what u think as always! (((also im trying this new format just for ficlets/og works teehee)))

----

“Oh mister sun, sun, mister golden sun,” Ace cooed as his rough fingers gently combed through your hair, “please shine down on me.” You shift on his lap, clearly still startled from the nightmare, but unwinding as he continues his humming while swaying lightly. 

He was so warm against the cold night.

“You feeling better?” His head lulled a bit to the side, his loud yawn permeating the night air. Guilt bloomed in your chest for waking him up in these delicate hours, but you couldn’t help but need comfort. Your late mother always sang Barney’s song to calm you when you were younger, so naturally it was the only way to unravel your nerves, despite it being a child’s song.

“Thanks for doing this, I know it’s not really your style.” You briefly apologized. He waved it off. 

“No biggie, anything for my girl.” He grinned, his toothy smile shining against the moonlit sea. Your giggle follows right after, his smiles always made you feel like everything was gonna be okay. 

“Love you babe,” you dreamily sigh, still high off broken sleep. 

“I know.”

You nestled your head on the meatiest part of his thigh, and fell asleep. When silence pervaded the air, he pulled you tight to him and closed his eyes. The tranquility of the night made you follow suit a bit after.

All things continued well, you went fishing with Ace the next morning, catching a bigger fish than him and bragging about it to Marco. 

“Cheater!” Ace kept chanting as he demanded a rematch. “You just got lucky, lemme show you how it’s really done.” Grumbling, you acquiesced to his ramblings and hooked on bait.

“Ho,ho. You’re going down, lover boy.” You bore your sole into the wood of the deck, readying yourself for battle. 

“Ready!” He counted down, “Set! Go!”

Fishing lines cast into the sea, a brief moment passing by before a fish tugs on your line first. Messily reeling it in, your feet trip over themselves, cursing as the rod slipped through your sweaty grip. Meanwhile, Ace grunted as he fought against his big catch before victoriously reeling it in. As much as you hate admitting it, you lost.

“Yeah!!” Ace rejoiced, admiring his fish, “we’re eating good tonight boys! Fire up the grills!” The resounding cheers of the crew followed after.

Moments like these, seeing everyone, especially Marco, merrily hammered with booze and seeing Ace mingling with the crowd, occasionally falling asleep, yet his smile never fading. It was moments like these that you wished never left because eventually everything becomes a distant memory.

As a little girl, you believed nightmares disappear after mom sings you to sleep. As an adult, you realized nightmares are never really gone; instead it slowly builds itself in a steady, continuous stream until it becomes real.

It became hell.

The marines took Ace. 

Whitebeard rampaged.

And one thing leads to the other, you find yourself alongside his little brother on the battlefield. Ace looked disparaged sitting atop of the execution platform, protected by the best of the best.

“Ace!” With a determined look raging through his pupils, he grit his teeth and dug his fingernails through the log he was carrying, “We’ll save you! Y/n and I, we’ll save you!” His promise rang throughout the battlefield, commencing the beginning of the end.

The battle ensues, one thing leads to another and Ace is free, running towards freedom. 

Until Akainu provokes him.

“Ha, the loser from the dead generation finally met his time.” The magma man inched closer as the flames flickered off of Ace’s body, angry.

“Take that back.” Ace growled, his white-knuckled fist engulfed in his flames. 

Akainu snickered. “In other words, he’s an eternal loser who will never surpass Roger. Making all his underlings call him ‘old man’ and ‘father’ or whatever.... he got stabbed because his stupid ‘sons’ believed every word he said.”

“The old man gave us a place where we belong,” Ace lunged forward, fist in front, swallowed with rage, “don’t make fun of the old man who saved my life!”

He dodged gracefully, turning on his heel to jab Ace in the rib. They exchange punches, the belligerent admiral having the upper hand due to Ace’s lagging and recklessness. Akainu’s eyes shifted from the fire fist to the strawhat. 

Perfect, he thought, time to end this.

He leaped in the air towards Luffy, the magma on his fist leaving a trail behind him and a smile as wide as ever. He won.

His fist never connected with the strawhat. 

It bore a hole through Ace instead.

Even better.

Overwhelming dread filled the battlefield, especially in Luffy’s unwavering faith, because holy shit you’re not supposed to see right through him. “Ace!” Marco called from the other side, soaring to his side while everyone froze in fear as they watched the events unfold. Whitebeard can only watch in lament, knowing that he did all that he could and it still wasn’t enough. Luffy promised to save him, but why does it feel like he’s the one Ace saved? 

He was there, within your reach. Why couldn’t you do anything? Why didn’t you do anything?

How could you let him die? Out of all the things you could’ve done for him, you cried.

Pathetic. 

He was right there.

You rushed into the rumbling battleground, skidding against the concrete to plant yourself next to him. Luffy’s head whipped to you, holding Ace in his shaking arms. “Y-y/n,” Luffy trembled, and the look in his eyes said it all. He’s dying.

Ace exchanged a few incoherent words with Luffy, so melancholic that he went into shock, mouth agape as his eyes rolled back into his skull.

Swapping places with Luffy, you held Ace’s head on your lap. “Hey, don’t cry,” he brushed the hair clinging to your wet face, “don’t make that face. Doesn’t look like you.” He joked as you pulled him closer to your chest with your foreheads touching and hands shaking as it was on either side of his cheeks, screaming in frustration as tears stained the ground and shamelessly dripped over his face. The warm air contrasted with the coldness of Ace’s body.

“You’re gonna be fine,” your eyes scanned for a doctor, “you’re gonna live, you’ll be fine!” You called out to the nearest medic, asking them to save him. 

“I’m sorry ma’am, it’s already too late, not much to do!”

“Bullshit! You’re a fucking doctor right? What kind of a doctor can’t even save a man dying in front of him?” 

Scared, the poor doctor frantically skirted away, while Ace stared into your orbs, admiring them one last time. “No need to be upset,” he nuzzled his cheek against your thigh, “he can’t save me. Nobody can. My insides are fried.”

“Don’t talk like that!” If he wasn’t injured, you would’ve slapped the living shit out of him. “You’re not dying. I refuse. Get up.” 

“It’s no use.”

You heave up his weight, slinging his arm over your shoulder, only to come crashing back down. The others watched in pity because all you can do was repeatedly punch the ground in dismay like a child throwing a tantrum.

“You can make it!”

“Y/n.” 

“Luffy promised we’d save you and I intend to keep my word.”

“Y/n.”

While watching you trying to save him in vain, unconscious tears wet his cheeks as he bit his lip. It broke his soul to know that he has to leave you like this and there’s nothing he can do to help you. He wants to live. For you. But he knows better than to dream, especially in the condition he’s in. He haphazardly tapped your face with the fading strength he had. 

“Y/n, calm down. I’ll be fine. Please don’t cry. Listen to me, yeah?” 

You nodded, knowing it was a lie, but acquiescing to hear your lover. 

“God, I’m so tired Y/n.” He took a shallow breath before continuing, “I wanna sleep but I don’t wanna go.” I don’t want to leave you alone, hangs on his lips.

This was the end of the line. You knew it was. His stagnant breaths told you so.

All of your movements stop, frustration replaced with empty acceptance. Ace can’t remember you like this, you thought, it’d only be harder for him. “Go ahead,” you manage to show him a forced smile, contrasting against your red nose and puffy eyes, telling him it’s okay. It’s okay to go. He was not nearly convinced, but it was getting harder to fight the sleep overwhelming his crisp body.

“Go sleep,” you encouraged once more, “I’ll be here for you, waiting for you.” You choked on the words as his smile relaxed, eyes fluttering shut. 

“Love you, y/n.”

“I know.”

“Thank you for loving me.”

Clenching your fists, you bit the insides of your cheeks, hoping to drown out the deafening world. Everyone was screaming, but your heart screamed louder. Don’t go, your heart pleaded, I need you. Please don’t leave me. 

But you knew better, Ace would’ve wanted to know that you’d be okay without him. You had to be strong. For him.

This is all that I can do for him.

Before all life left his body, you sang to him one last time, hoping it would provide him as much comfort as it did for you.

“Oh mister sun, sun, mister golden sun. Please shine down on me.” 

The wind gushed by, taking his last breath with it. The end of the beginning was concluding, clearing a new path for a new era in its place. The war raged, filled with metal clashing and the wailing of crestfallen loved ones. 

His vivre card burned, crumbling into thin air, as if it never existed.

Please wake me up from this nightmare.

[slashersins]

the fucking balls reference . 

rest of the movie commentary is under the cut 

god i hate this . i can’t believe that they are fucking messing with leslie . i wonder if leslie planed for this . OH MY GOD THE FINAL GIRL WAS FUCKING . OH WAIT OH FUCKING WAIT . WAIT . WAIT WAIT WAIT . FUCK WAIT . ARE YOU . ARE YOU . WAS TAYLOR THE FINAL GIRL THIS ENTIRE TIME . 

I WONDER . HMMM . 

maybe she isn’t i’m not sure . 

omfg . leslie is just chilling . i’m laughing so fucking hard . just striking a pose . 

where did the bodies go ? jesus fuck , man . taylor you fucked everything up . now leslie’s plan is ruined . at least he’s good at adjusting ? i hope leslie is still having fun though .

MOTHER FUCKING THEY THINK LESLIE IS A SCARECROW . “IMA PUT THIS IN MY ROOM” lmao . oof . there he is . OOOH NEW WEAPON . 

WAIT . is leslie’s mask supposed to be a turtle ? that would make sense . ALSO HE JUST FUCKING PUT THAT GUYS HEART IN HIS HAND LMAO . 

leslie is really good , in a bad way , but really . HOW DOES THE SURVIOR GIRL HOP ON THE NERDY KIDS JONSHON AHHHAHAHAHAHHAAHA 

90% OF ALL WHORES KNOWS THAT THEY’RE WHORES . 

move to the cars. OH THATS WHERE THE BODIES ARE . ya know , that was really creative leslie . a for effort . 

let’s put all the weight on “final girls” back . also “IM SORRY IM NOT A VIRGIN” DID THAT BITCH JUST FALL OUT THE WINDOW ? leslie just looks up like “ are you fucking kidding me ? ”

OMFG FAT GUY IS TAKEN AND L . CHASE THE DOUGH BOY . GOD . POOR TODD . he really did do his best . but leslie is upsettii spaghetti . 

oof . taylor realizing the truth . or at least she might be . i’m not sure . 

“you have to tell me , what happens to me ?” bitch what the fuck do you think happens ?

oooh freddy not freddy showed up . pantie shot . 

oof he’s not dead . why don’t you just help the doctor man . WHY NOT HELP . omfg he just knocks him out so casually . HAHAAAHAAHAHAHHAHA . “you gotta go through me” slap . 

OMFG YOU KNOW WHICH WEAPONS ARE FUCKING . . . WHY DID . JESUS . omfg there you go . birth canal time . to be reborn as someone who wants revenge . 

ooh choke scene . SCYTH TO THE SIDE . OH MY FUCKING GOD THE FUCKING APPLE CRUSHER . DFHKALFJKAL;DFJKALFJLK;FJALK;JGFALKGJDALJLK;AFJKAL;FDJKL;JA

LESLIE . IS HE DYING ? NO . LESLIE . NOOOOOOOOOOOO . HIS POOR HEAD . DID HE KNOW ? DID HE FUCKING KNOW ? 

THE barn is on fire . . . i don’t want him to be just a man . i want him to be super natural . nnnnnng . 

[scenecipriano]

Such Horrible Things(6)

Chapter Six: When They Were Fourteen…

Summary: Roman and Remus Hartfield are identical twins, with Roman being only two minutes and fifty-two seconds older than Remus. The two are polar opposites, Roman the loud and boisterous twin who loved Disney and various musicals, and Remus the twin who preferred to keep to himself until he grew close to you and showed his true chaotic nature. But is Remus really the chaotic one? Or is it the brother that people least expect…

Warnings: Unsympathetic Roman, Blood, Violence, Emotional Manipulation, Gaslighting, Mildly Unsympathetic Logan and Patton, Implied/Reference to Character Death (In later chapters)

TW For this chapter: Animal cruelty, death mention

AU Type: Human

Ships: Logicality, (Toxic) Roceit (In later chapters), and Dukexiety (In later chapters)

——————–

Roman was bored, hopelessly uttering bored. Most summers for him weren't bored considering he had Remus to torment, but no this summer his twin decided to go to art camp. Their papa tried to convince him to go as well, but Roman wasn't about to go to some stupid camp and get eat up with multiple mosquitos while being surrounded by annoying kids. Roman sighs as he stabs the pointed stick he had through the abdomen of the frog he had pinned down, its guts and blood splattering against the warm rock it was pinned to. If Remus were here, his arm would be in the frog's place. The fourteen-year-old couldn't help but snort in amusement at the thought.

   "Can hear him now, 'Please, Ro let me go! I'll tell!' he's always been such a bitch." Roman mutters as he stabs the frog over and over again, causing more of its blood to paint the rock a dark red.

    This would be something that would chill his papa to the bone, honestly, he didn't understand how a grown man could be so childish. 'I bet he screams like a girl, he does whenever he and dad decide to get freaky.'  Roman chuckles to himself as he drags the stick down, cutting the frog's stomach completely open, watching as its guts spill completely out.

    "Roman! Dinner time kiddo!" His papa calls.

     The teen stares down at the frog's mutilated corpse for a moment, the time ticking away. A smirk forms on Roman's face as he scoops the frog up, ignoring the bloody mess that was becoming of his hands.

     "Coming, papa!"

     Roman stuffs the dead frog into his pocket, he wipes his hands clean on the grass as to not distress his papa about the alarming amount of blood that was gathered on them. He pushes himself up from the ground and runs towards his house, a giddy feeling seeping into his chest, 'This is going to be fun...'

    As Roman stood at the sink, preparing to wash his hands, he took the opportunity to slip the dead frog into the silverware drawer, knowing that his papa was always forgetful when it came to setting the utensils out. Roman chuckles as he quickly closes the drawer back, washing his hands good to get rid of the dirt and leftover blood. Once his hands were cleaned and dried, Roman took his seat at the table where his parents were waiting.

   "So, how was your day today, Roman?" His dad asks.

    "It was okay, little boring without Rem here..."

    "Kiddo, you sure you don't want to join him at camp? I think you would have a lot of fun!" His papa chimes in.

     Roman sneers his nose up, 'What are they trying to do? Get rid of me?'

     "Patton, sweetheart you forgot the silverware again."

     "Shoot! You're right, I'll be right back!"

     A grin forms on Roman's face, he sits up straighter in his chair. Softly he begins to count down, he covers his mouth to muffle his laugh when a high pitched scream comes from the kitchen. He watched as his dad moved away from the table to check on his papa, a sound of disgust tells him that his dad has seen the heavily mutilated frog. Roman couldn't help the small giggle that left his mouth.

    "Roman Winston Hartfield! Did you put this frog in the drawer?"

    "I thought it was something cool, papa! Don't you like it? ...I did it myself."

    The way Roman spoke sent a chill up Patton's spine, he glances over to Logan who looked as equally spooked by their fourteen-year-old. Logan takes a deep breath and steps back into the dining room, he narrows his eyes at Roman.

    "Well, what you did wasn't nice, Roman. You're grounded, now go get that frog out of here and be sure to wash your hands again when you're done."

    Roman's jaw went slack as he stares at his father, 'He can't be serious?'

    "You're grounding me, over a harmless, prank? That's not fair!!"

    "Life isn't fair, Roman, now do as you're told or your grounding will last longer than a week," Logan scolds.

     Roman softly growls under his breath as he stands from the dining room table, he pushes past his father making sure to shove the older man a bit as he does. He grabs the frog, making sure to squeeze a bit more blood out of it, staining the silverware as he does. Roman stomps outside and hurls the dead frog across the backyard.

    "You want to ground me for something stupid? Fine, but I'm going to give you a reason to ground me you ass."

    Roman learned the hard way that cutting something's head off wasn't as easy as television made it out to be. That and all he had was a kitchen knife, but he was able to saw through the rabbit's neck. That morning when he heard his parents mixed screams, Roman smiled and for once it reached his eyes.

   "I don't want to go!!" Roman screams as he tries to pull away from his papa. When Patton tightens his grip, that led to his son screaming even louder. After the bunny incident and various other incidents that Patton really didn't want to talk about right now, he and Logan thought it was best that Roman see a psychiatrist.

  "You don't get a choice, Roman! Now stop fighting!"

   With one final tug, Patton was able to pull Roman into the psychiatrist's office, it was the same doctor that they had Remus seeing. Dr. Emile Picani stares at them with shocked brown eyes. Patton offers him an apologetic smile as he forces Roman to sit in one of the brown leather chairs in front of Emile's oak desk.

  "I'm going to assume this is, Roman?" Emile asks.

  "Yes, sorry he's... He's having a difficult time right now."

  Roman barks out a humorless laugh, catching both adult's attention as he does.

  "More like you and dad are having a difficult time, I told you that I didn't want to fucking be here."

  Patton softly scolds Roman for his language, which only led to the teen rolling his eyes at his papa's weak discipline actions. Emile clears his throat, capturing both of Roman and Patton's attention. He offers Roman a polite smile as he pushes his pink glasses up the bridge of his nose.

 "Well, Roman, it's nice to make your acquaintance. Patton, you can step out now I'd like to have a chat with Roman."

 Patton takes a shaky breath and nods, closing the door behind him as he leaves. Roman huffs and folds his arms over his chest, sliding down into his chair as he glares at the smiling doctors face.

 "So, why don't you tell me a little about yourself Roman?"

  Psychopathic tendencies are what Emile had called it. Roman had been seeing for a good two weeks now, and that was what the good doctor came up with was psychopathic tendencies. Sure, Roman lacked empathy, or a real conscience apparently not having a little voice in your head telling you right from wrong wasn't normal. Roman remembers his papa breaking down into tears, he remembers rolling his eyes at the man's theatrics, he cried as if Roman were dying.

 "Is there any way we can treat it, Dr. Picani? Medicine? Therapy?" His dad asked.

 "There are no known medicine for this no... but group therapy may help. This would give Roman a chance to interact with other people like him, maybe even help him cope with his issue."

  Roman remembered frowning at the idea, hating at having to be around annoying people for two hours, he remembers wanting to throw a fit, yelling at the adults that he didn't need therapy, but he's glad he didn't do that.

 Roman smirks and saunters up to his latest prey, making sure to replace the devious smirk with a soft smile that was similar to his papa's.

 "Hi, I'm Roman Hartfield it's nice to meet you!"

 The boy with a yellow beanie with matching gloves looks at him, his blue and amber eyes look directly into his green ones. The burn mark on the boy's face stood out like a sore thumb, but it didn't ruin his looks in Roman's opinion. The boy smiles back and offers a gloved hand to Roman.

 "I'm Eden Summers! It's nice to meet too, Roman!"

 Roman notices the scars that littered Eden's arms as he shook the boy's hand, he allows his smirk to return.

 'Things just got interesting~.'

--------------

~TAGLIST~: @sparrow-flightninggale @perhaps-im-dave-rolland

A/N: WELL WELL WELL LOOK WHO GOT CAUGHT-  And was led straight to a new victim

Also note! I’m not saying that all diagnosed psychopaths are evil! Roman just turns out to be very violent- 

[rosethehat]

doctor sleep script thoughts

here are some notes that i jotted down while reading the screenplay. I had A LOT of thoughts and it made me feel many things I hadn’t felt this way in a long time :’)

Sarey in her 50’s? Probably written before casting

Crow being just ‘Crow’ in the script not ‘Crow Daddy’

In this draft Andi laughs at Rose’s offer and is just overall braver than the final version?

The Billy vs Bill thing

Patient’s dying breath changed from red to regular smoke colour like the other ones

Not as much translucent skulls etc maybe to save budget on VFX?

The way Crow can always tell when something’s wrong with Rose

The fucking in the I fuckign want her I’mo so gad it was added

Added a lot more “Rosie’s”

Dick’s description of the True Knot, they rode on camels, drove caravans across Eastern Europe ..

Confirms that Grampa turned her

her saying "we are legion" that sounds so corny im so glad it was cut out too

I think cutting out the True Knot’s backstory allows for the audience to have more fun with imagining it as what we want it to be.

It implies that The True Knot started with Grampa Flick which, while it adds to the emotional weight of Grampa Flick’s death and emphasizes their motive to find more steam, it honestly kind of takes away the mystery of this super ancient cult

ROSE/CROW KISS right before he departs (a lot of earlier Rose/Crow things like her crawling towards him and the forehead kiss weren’t written in though)

The location “Crow’s RV” and Andi driving in a separate RV. Interesting cause she wouldn’t look 16 to be able to drive?

ROSE/CROW PHONECALL

Dan smashing bottle out the window

RED BATHROOM SCENE

The whole maze Overlook scene wasn’t written in there yet

Dan saying “I’m right where I’m supposed to be” parallels the first hospice patient telling him he’s right where he belongs with his old job as ‘doctor sleep’ and now this is his new role where he feels like he belongs / is his purpose

The ending for Dan is very different because we don’t see Wendy / younger Dan, which was a big part of the film that helped me understand/accept that ending, so I’m glad Wendy was added later on. Otherwise for me the ending makes less sense from my interpretation of finally looking Wendy in the face

Also I’m glad Abra also adds that her father is okay in the movie when she says that Dan is okay cause it makes more sense

[dumbcuckbucket]

i uhh wrote a thing and i just need to put it somewhere and forget it exists.

no one talks about the ugly nights when youre chronically ill. you hear about the bad nights, the dangerous nights, and occasionally even the good nights. but you rarely hear about the nights when someone lays awake in bed, crying from pain that they cant stop and wondering why the fuck they deserve to feel this way.

why am i, at twenty, so tired of living in so much pain all the time, that im questioning life? not in a suicidal way, let me make that very clear. ive been actively suicidal before, and this is different. i want to stop existing, but i dont want to die. i simply want to stop hurting.

why is it that when the sun comes up and ive gotten little to no sleep, my body still screaming in pain, must i pretend i am okay? brush it off as simply a life i am used to and thats that. i am used to it, but why must that be okay? why must i exist this way?

around nine i will roll out of bed and pretend my joints dont burn and that my head doesnt weep and act as if i havent spent the better part of the night terrified of how my illness will affect my future and silently sobbing about it. i’ll feed my dog and take him out. there’s some fresh air. its nice, but i’m tired. i want to lay down again.

i’ll shower, which will take so much of my energy that i do not have anymore. i’ll make phone calls. it seems like all my life is is phone calls, and then spaces between calls where life moves around me and i make no progress. i’ll call my doctor and ask for blood tests to see if my meds are working. i’ll call a different doctor to make sure my referral was granted by my other doctor. if it hasnt been, i’ll call that doctor.

i have an appointment at 11. its supposed to help. im getting screened for adhd and other mental disabilities that may be affecting my studies. what doesnt affect my studies anymore? im stressed about work, im stressed about my family, im stressed about covid and money and my studies and i am so tired. its supposed to help. i am already so resigned to hear that theres nothing wrong, because nothing is ever wrong if i dont fight and get different opinions. i am so fucking tired of fighting. i hope i get the help i need, because i dont think i can keep trying to get it.

my mom died. did i tell you that? two years ago, right after i moved away for college. her birthday is in 9 days. i wish i could talk to her. its hard, holding resentment for someone because of how they treated you while missing them so deeply it feels like a bullet wound.

her funeral was weird. it never really hit me that she died. i mean, i know shes dead. ive known. but when the treatments stopped and the cancer spread, she died long before her heart stopped. i wish i had better memories. i know there had to be good ones there, but i only remember the bad and the dying.

its crazy that of all the things that could be wrong with me, its chronic shitting disease. it feels like a joke. trying to talk about a chronic illness in almost any setting is hard enough. imagine that chronic illness relating to poop. it sucks.

after my appointment i have to go pick up a prescription. i hope it helps. it needs to help, because i am so tired of doctors and phone calls and the ever piling list of meds that dont work. having medication lists sent to new doctors and having to say “no i stopped that one when i started this one” and “that one didnt work” over and over and over gets exhausting. i don’t remember half of the meds they name anymore.

my roommates dont understand. i wish they did. they dont realize how hard it is for me to brush my teeth, let alone cook and clean. then to have to socialize with them at the end of the day feels like pulling teeth. i love them. theyre my best friends, my tether to life when i feel like im floating while the world moves without me. i just wish they understood.

i’ll try to go to class after i get my prescription. i’ll log on and ignore it, like i always do. i’ll lay down in bed with my computer muted, looking through twitter or looking at etsy. anything to not deal with the real world for a few minutes. the real world is so exhausting.

im still crying, but its fine. this is my life, its how it is. im used to it. its okay. (a lie, but a good one).

i’ll call my dad. i’ll lie when he asks how i am. i’ll tell him im tired because i havent slept well this week (lie of omission). he’ll ask how im feeling. i’ll tell him im fine (a direct lie). ill tell him about my appointment and my new inhaler and all the calls ive made. i’ll make a joke about how much it all fucking sucks (not a joke, but my tone doesnt let the truth out). he’ll tell me about his days off. he’ll tell me about work, and the grocery shopping he did, and how he still has laundry and that he hasnt done anything in the garage yet. he’ll tell me what hes making for dinner. i’ll say it sounds good (a lie; nothing sounds good to me anymore) and i’ll say im jealous (a truth; i miss his food). we’ll sit in silence for a bit, then he’ll say “well i gotta get going” and we’ll say goodbye. he’ll say i love you. i’ll say it back (the final truth). one of us will remember something to talk about. we’ll say goodbye again.

i’ll lay down again, and while the sun is out i wont think about how much i hate this. how i, at twenty, dont deserve this. how i have had my future robbed from me so i can make calls and appointments and run through a mile long list of medications.

my dog will lay down with me, and i will feel guilty for not taking him to the park to play.

i’ll remember i have to pay rent. i get up to do it. i bring my dog, and we go to the park. he runs himself hard, so we only stay for half an hour. we’ll go home, he’ll be happy, and i’ll be exhausted. i’ll go lay down and vaguely think about my school work. i wont do it. i’ll let my roommates decide what we do for the night. i’ll try to make some food, or order something. they’ll make fun of me, not realizing it hurts that they dont see that being alive is so hard for me. they dont understand, but thats okay. it has to be okay.

ive stopped crying. my knees and ankles and elbows and fingers still hurt. my stomach churns and my head is pounding, but im used to it. its okay. it has to be okay.

[spadesinglasses]

The Old Guard (Movie)

okay after days and days of seeing the lovely Joe and Nicky just pop up in my youtube recommendation along with the other gay couples. I finally finally got my hands on the movie and found the perf day to watch it.

Okay let’s begin the reaction. Which im actually writing as soon as i ended the film.

First thing first, i was expecting a repeat of the monologue of when they first died on screen again when the scene repeated. Lowkey hurt that it didn’t happen but i can see why.

Second, the betrayal box was shown on the trailer so that was not surprising. Sad that Lala, sorry that’s the character from kinky boots lol, i’m sad about Copley’s character. His reason for betraying Andy and the gang was personally not good enough. 

I can see why Copley would be persistent on having a cure for disease. Anyone who had a love one die because of some uncurable disease would feel that way. Still, i call bs on his naive thinking. A bunch of immortals being handed off to a scientist, AND HE THOUGHT THAT THEY WERE GOING TO BE MORALLY GOOD ABOUT IT? AND NOT TREAT SAID IMMORTALS AS RATS?

Really dude?

Is the history in The Old Guard universe THAT different for ours? Is racism not a thing there? Hilarious.

Sorry I wanted to word the above stuff in a more direct way, but i feel like it’s going to be a bit vile and too much so i’ll refrain from saying it. All i’m gonna say is that Copley was not thinking when he cooperated with a white scientist guy.

My bad way of thinking aside. Let’s get back to the movie.

When Booker first came on to the screeen i felt bad vibes from him. Something about his whole thing was not clicking for him. I knew something was bad was going to happen.

Also a sign that Booker and Copley is going to betray them would’ve been when Copley saw that Nicky had his gun on him. I doubt Copley could see from that far. So unless Booker fed him info, that will be entirely impossible.

Moving on, the bullshit that is mr lex luthor batman v superman edition 2.0 and his ranting in that convention. I knew i’m gonna hate him as soon as he opened his mouth.

One thing i hate the most are villains who justify their medical bullshittery.

We all want for medicine to progress.

We are all aware that science is never morally good. And most of all doctors and scientists has the moral compass of a cookoo clock. 

An immortal plus a scientist will always always equate to fucking hot mess.

I knew Copley is going to have a reason for why he was working with Merrick. Copley was morally good, he really thought he was doing the right thing, hell he worshiped the gang and their results. Its just that for him, he wanted to have a hand on it.

We can all debate whether he has ulterior motives subconsciously. Or whether it was all just about his wife dying. (my side will be that he subconsciously wanted a hand on shaping the future, but it was buried by his want to save people who was suffering what he went through.)

But yeah that connection was solidified when he talked about his wifey.

Now can we just talk about that scene of Joe and Nicky just spitting poems at one another? Right off the bad we were introduced with a soft spoken and soothing Nicky with a snarky Joe and my goooooood when Joe started talking about who Nicky is for him my  heart clenched and I just imagined being the receiving end of both of their romantic gestures. Omfg i would dieeee.

(fun fact, even after watching the trailer and seeing a lot of gifs and edits of that scene, it didn’t click to me that Joe is played by Hot Jafar actor. My friend had to point that out for me to finally get the AHA moment xD. I knew something was familiar about the guy and his voice but yeah xD)

I wish to be sang by Joe and Nicky as they both cuddle me to sleep. Oh to be the middle of that sandwhich ;A; one can only hope.

Oh i also wanted to talk about Nile’s pov with killing. I have no idea how long she had been in the military before “awakening” so im not sure and again this might sound immature, tone deaf or ignorant but, she really joined the military and was surprised that they kill people and taught to deal with it? Has she not heard of the veterans who leave the military filled with ptsd and some other stuff? 

At the very least she looks like a millenial and you’re telling me she has that all sunshine and rainbows point of view of the military? This is like Copley all over again. That ranting was really unnecessary and it didn’t even resolve or whatever. 

I get it she’s young and new. She literally has a family she couldn’t leave just like that BUT all she focused on is the fact that Andy killed a lot of people? REALLY? THAT’S WHAT MAKES YOU NOT WANT TO HELP THEM?

Im sorry  that part is just ridiculous for me. At the very least find something better to hang over Andy’s head. Like i dunno colluding with drug people i guess?

OH OH You know what really made me sure that Booker is working for Copley and Merrick? That is when he talked about his son dying of cancer. That moment I was like “Oh yep this is my confirmation. I better prepare myself.”

I want to be thankful that the torture scene was not too much. I hate plots and tropes of scientists and doctor quacks toying with humanity and such because they are always so graphic and just inhumane. Thank god the director is a woman and we didn’t have to deal with unnecessary testosterone bullshitery that most male directors do for their movies.

I was definitely not expecting to feel sad for Booker. When they passed the judgement to him, It was fucking sad. Deserving but nonetheless sad. Booker hated being alone and straight boy has a point when he talked about how Nicky and Joe have one another. But still fucker got my gays locked up, I ain’t treating him nicely after that.

OH THE TWIST AT THE END. IM FUCKING SURPRISED. AND HORRIFIED THAT SHE MIGHT BE THE NEW BIG BAD.

AND BOOKER POTENTIALLY WORKING WITH HER? straight boy really ain’t learning anything huh.

Im excited for the possibility of a second. I’m excited to see more of Quynh and what she can do. I really hope that she ends up becoming a goodie at the end. I really don’t want her to just die as a villain.

Overall. Despite the lack of solid motivations and conflicts and stuff, the movie is very good. I rarely watch action movies because its always testoroney filled bullshits. and just dicking romance but yeah The Old Guard is right up my alley.

Now for the theories i come up while watching.

Disclaimer that I have not or is not going to follow the comics that this movie is based on. I don’t have the interest to do so so if any of my theories is actually canon and has already been talked about before, and is confirmed, please understand that I don’t do in depth research for these posts. This is all just the ranting of a guy who watched a movie. Not a critique that seem to be very abundant here in tumblr.

Theory The immortal 5

I have not kept track on how many immortals are there but my theory is that only 5 immortals are allowed to exist. When Andy lost her immortality she said that its finally her time, that maybe she finally reached her end goal. Does that mean that Nile was not immortal before that time? I would assume so because her family would’ve freaked out right off the bad when she’s a kid and her wounds just close up right in front of them.

So the immortality is not birth given but rather bestowed when one of the immortals reach their end. Im not sure if it’ll be just 5 or so, but there seems to be a give and take situation with the immortality. We also find that it’s not according to who got it first or who’s the oldest since some guy died first before Andy when we know Andy is the oldest. 

uhmm... welps i think i forgot the rest of the theories i have in my head that haven’t yet confirmed by the film lmao.

oh well.

ANYWHO.

I love it i loooooove it

 i wanna be in the middle of joe and nicky or just be see them personally flirt with one another. I would die happily.

[smoliboops]

the egos as different (new who) incarnations of the Doctor: revisted

(havent written an analysis type of thing in a while, miss sharing ideas with people in general aha :’D)

originally 2am thoughts/concepts that i might draw aka revisiting the concept of the egos as different regenerations of the doctor (debate and additions are welcome):

schneeplestein- nine

(first regeneration after the time war and as such major guilt and lonliness from being the sole survivor who also had to be the one to end it. this paralleling to schneep’s 9 month disappearance and his possible guilt resulting from the events of say goodbye and moreso kill jse (as well as schneep probably doing risky things in the name of stopping anti). other things including, sass, calling humans “stupid apes”, rational, angry sometimes, but can appreciate the ancient human music that is tainted love, saving their friend/companion and telling them to live a good life as they head off to face their longtime enemy,the pain you see on his face when he gets compared to said enemy (”you would make a good puppet dalek), bananas being good source of potassium)

chase- ten

(is kind of a mess but a cool mess, generally the most emotional/human of the incarnations, starts off as a cool, charismatic type of guy but slowly goes downward into a spiral of sadness and lonliness as everyone he loved leaves (ya see the connection im getting at?), loses the girl he loved and missing the chance to tell her he loved her, ”im fine” he says as he just lost his best friend and is now alone standing in the pouring rain, accidentally quoting the lion king and harry potter but also “no second chances im that kind of man,” loves little shops and making things that go ding and silly made up words like “wibbly wobbly timey wimey”, literally Human Nature/Family of Blood shows how much he wanted a human life with a wife and kids and the episode "the doctor's daughter" where he finally gets a kid and loses her, the hero who goes from saving the universe with all his friends around him to him dying alone not wanting to go, literally called “the man that regrets” in dotd, listen to love don't roam on YouTube)

jj- eleven

(the doctor with the most confusing timeline, child-like wonder and the look of a young lad hiding the tired eyes of an old man who has seen and gone through so much, very protective of his fond family/people he loves, he literally snuck into a charlie chaplin film in s6′s immpossible astronaut, also stayed in Victorian london for a time which would be jj's aesthetic tbh, can be silly and clumsy and starry-eyed while also being capable of becoming the oncoming storm, “ Good men don't need rules, today is not the day to find out why i have so many.”, great with kids, like weird/unique hatwear, b o w t i e s, g o g g l e s, just wants to go home even if it’s the long way round, “every lonely monster needs a companion” (you can’t tell me jj probably would still feel like a monster cos of how closely related he is to anti), and also theres puppets in two episodes of his, despite the darkness and loneliness it just made him kind, the optimist, the hoper of far flung hopes and the dreamer of improbable dreams )

marvin- twelve

(recognizing gender as a concept far beyond them obvs, he’s literally called a magician half the time lol, avoiding death by rocking out in the 1500s with an electric guitar on top of an army tank, “can you hurry up before i hit you with my shoe”, as a morally gray character that many theorize whether he’s good/bad, marvin relates well to twelve’s whole journey of questioning if he was a good man and willing to learn the extents of what that means, tried his best to not only do right but to try to help those who weren’t good people who he knew needed help, would fight robin hood irl with a spoon and have a sign saying “go away humans”, not totally great with social cues but he tries and that’s what counts, seemingly cold and harsh and grump but take time to know him and he’s actually warm deep down, "do you think i care for you so little that betraying me would make a difference?", wiliing to "go to hell" for their friend, not only protective of the people he loves but is also willing to to things like repeatedly die over 8 billion years and almost cause the destruction of the universe for the sake of saving his friend, would sacrifice himself recklessly in the name of standing up for what he believed in)

jackieboy man-thirteen

(total ray of sunshine who also recognizes the dangers of being close to them (i.e. dying, forgetting, getting trapped in another time or parallel world, getting converted and dying, etc) and as such keeps those they love at a distance, literally not talking about who they truly were for a whole series cos they didn't want to wrap their family up into their own troubles they faced, adorably socially awkward/anxious but still perseveres in the face of danger and certain doom, "darkness never sustains, even though sometimes it feels like it might," would build their own gadgets, g o g g l e s, would eat dirt and bone dust for analysis, would save the day by becoming best friends with a sentient universe in the form of a frog, always tries to have a flat team structure but in reality "this team structure...it isn't flat. It's mountainous, with me, in the stratosphere, alone, left to choose. Save jack the poet, save the universe. Sometimes, even i can't win.", P U N S)

Bonus content: anti as sacha Dawhan's master

like *chefs kiss* (LITERALLY pretended to be the doctor's friend for years until revealing he actually killed him before she met him and took his place (that gif is him just throwing away that dude's minituraized dead body btw), the kneel scene, his s m i l e, maniacal g l e e as he destroys everything and kills people all to cover up the pain and sadness and anger he feels inside because of her *cough a piece of SPOILER being inside him and him not being able to stand it is definitely anti/jack vibes cough*, also imagine this small exchange but between jackieboy man and anti:

The doctor: "proud of yourself?"

The master: "Definitely."

The doctor: "all this death...Finally made you happy?"

The Master, smiling: "Ecstatic."

The doctor, closer to his face: "And has it calmed all the rage?"

The master, pausing and looking away: "...I don't think anything will ever do that."

Also pls watch that spyfall pt1 reveal scene (basically the whole ending tbh), again it's just *chef's kiss*

Ok that's enough blabbering from me. Still debating on drawing the egos as the doctor (ooh maybe a screen cap redraw would be fun if some people have suggestions for an ep to ref for each one (granted who knows if I'd have time to draw them all but I'm curious anyway lol)) ok time to head out *yeets*.

[keyofjetwolf]

GIFTENING Bonus Rounds

For each category, I included a “bonus round” question. YOU GUYS KILLED IT. I loved all the answers, but listed below are some of my particular favourites.

Haruka Tenoh is trapped in the wrong anime! Which would you have her visit next?

I want her to earth shake Kyubey out of existence, please and thank you

My bride is a mermaid. She can relate. :P

i think she would THRIVE in bodacious space pirates. gay teenage space pirates whose job is to dress up, be Dramatic, and rob the wealthy??? that shit is RIGHT up her alley

Hamtaro

Princess Tutu - where the world is finally as dramatic as her

PGSM (and Michiru is trapped with her, for REASONS)

Pokemon because everyone deserves to be happy

Any moe-style series so hijinks can ensue at her being baffled by everyone's ages

1960's Speed Racer

is is this a captcha or something i missed oh god

Free! so she can be indifferent to all the hot men and slightly uncomfortable because she still can't swim. 

Stick Haruka in a Gundam!

Dump her in Pretear or one of the Precures! It would be hilarious! She's never in the genre she wants to be!

Revolutionary Girl Utena, so she can be offended by misuse of roses.

Initial D, she will out-drive and out-drift all those guys and steal all their girls.

Evangelion. I would feel bad to watch her suffer, but it would be so, so funny for her to be the comparatively most normal person around.

Yakitake Japan! SO SHE CAN HAVE A SNACK OF DELICIOUS RIDICULOUS BREAD BEFORE THE NEXT INTERDIMENSIONAL ANIME STORM WHISKS HER AWAY.

The Holograms or the Misfits? DISCUSS

Holograms

both? both. BOTH IS GOOD

misfits bc Evil Ladies Hot

Steven and the stevens

Misfits.  How dare you make us try to think about anything in our lives.

Both, you mad fool. Those combined songs were the best.

The Misfits, their songs are better

The Misgrams: A group of girls who form a singing telegram start up company, but constantly deliver the telegrams to the wrong people.

kimber & stormer

Neither. Limp Lizards all the way. BROKEN GLASS.

I do not know what these things are

Misfits because guitar motorcycle

The Isle of Misfit Holograms

Holograms is just arguably better

I mean, I’m told the Misfits’ songs are better, but my true answer is the band Kimber and Stormer made in that big gay episode you liveblogged (checks) almost four years ago.

I've no idea what these words mean and I hope this does not make me TOO uncool.

this is about jem, right? right?? im hip i swear

Misfits, because Jasper is a member apparently

I don't know from Jem, but I mean...I certainly prefer holographic material to Glenn Danzig? So I guess there's your answer ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

The Stingers

LIMP LIZARDS FOREVER

Senshi Band

You can make me liveblog a full series of any show you want! You also hate me. What do you have me watch?

Pick a GoT rip-off, any GoT rip-off

The Bachelor?

The Bachelor :(

depends on how much i hate you, but....probably the bachelor. quantity AND lack of quality

Critical role, it would take forever

If I were a horrible person who sought only malice?  Big Bang Theory.  Entire series.

Toddlers and Tiaras

The Mandalorian - Disney would come after you and kill keyofjetwolf just as dead as keyofnik.  We would all be very sad, you would have to go through a second round of restoring things to a new tumblr account, and your organizational heart would weep over adding yet another hosting site out of chronological order.

You are liveblogging Eva, and must discuss in full detail Shinji's emotional state at all times.

Hannity & Colmes

The Kardashians. And all of their spin offs. *kisses*

The price is right

the bachelor

Probably something with lots of romance and no friendships. Soap operas are like that, right? My college roommate used to watch General Young Light Restless Hospital of Our Lives (which one had Like and Laura?) And it was torture.

One Piece, because it's over 900 episodes so you could maybe do 10% before you die, also you will hate how the women are treated most of the time.

Fushigi Yuugi. Not only do you hate it but it also comes with you squirming when you admit to watching the whole thing. ;) 

Plus belle la vie. It's an ongoing French soap opera that has been airing five days a week since 2004, they're nearing their 4000th episode and there's no end in sight. Imagine all those hours upon hours submerged in French drama, mwahahaha!!

The Bachelor.  Or the Bachelorette, maybe - more straight dudes in that.

The Young and the Restless - IT IS THE LIVEBLOG THAT NEVER ENDS. IT WOULD OUTLAST THE INTERNET.

The entirety of the Bachelor franchise.

You can only play one game for the rest of your life. Which game would it be and why?

Kingdom Hearts Complete Collection. A) I love them. B) I beat the system and get like 10 games instead of one.

Gemcraft. This game actually takes a lifetime to finish.

Hatoful Boyfriend. It is the best game ever created. Feel it in your heart.

that's a mean question and you can't make me answer it

Pathfinder, which you could play for the rest of your life and still never finish.

Civ VI , so I can rule the world without leaving my house.

I am legitimately perturbed by this question and refuse to answer it.

Pokemon Go. I would have nothing else, but I would catch them all.

The Elder Scrolls Skyrim: I'll never run out of side-quests.

Mass Effect--it's the only way I'll get full completion. 

The dinosaur game on Chrome when the internet doesn't connect because my life is monotonous and it's a welcome relief. 

Stardew Valley. Peaceful farmer life and turning my children into doves when I'm bored with them.

Crabs Adjust Humidity

Oh my! A number of things come to mind, not one of them fit for print. Just, you know...*gestures vaguely* sex shit. 

I can't even stick to the ones I play now.

This is the worst of all possible things and I refuse to answer. 

Monopoly, I hate myself :(

Probably Minecraft! I haven't gotten into it because I know if I start I will NEVER STOP. Who would do things like build a hundred foot tall statue of Mako-chan? A-THAT'D BE ME.

the game. Of LIFE! *shrug emoji*

I don't believe I'll tell you, because I AM a salty little fish and it was HARD to cut that 11th choice off my vote.

Holligay and I are going to be the leads in a new buddy film. What's the premise? How does it end?

Be gay do crimes. Thelma and Louise. Duh. :P

I have no idea but only just surviving disaster is how it ends.

You break down in a small town during a roadtrip- your stay is full of hijinks and ends with you teaching the townsfolk the true meaning of friendship.

Doctor Holligay, Esquire, PhD, renowned Jewish femme of many talents, is assigned one Operative Jet Wolf as her bodyguard on a foreign diplomatic mission/vacation/culinary tour of the world ("same difference, shut up, narrator"). One problem: Operative Wolf needs a bodyguard herself, as the good doctor discovers when in one night her toilet is destroyed ("IT WAS A SECURITY THREAT") and Operative Wolf nearly breaks a leg falling down a small set of stairs ("THEY PUT A CLIFF OUTSIDE THE DOOR"). Worldwide shenanigans ensue as Holligay and Operative Wolf learn the true meaning of friendship, and also how to take care of themselves... by taking care of each other.

I’m not sure about the premise, but DEFINITELY it ends in murder.

Someone posted a major spoiler during one of your liveblogs. The two of you track them down seeking revenge. It turns out it was the original creator of the series trying to stop you. For some reason Holligay is a CGI badger.

It's clearly a buddy cop movie, and like all good buddy cop movies, it ends with Doc almost dying, and you saving her, and slapping her wound in the hospital as the credits roll.

It ends as it began: with Holligay roasting you.

A straight detective and her lesbian partner have to solve the case of the missing cinnamon buns.  It ends with nobody getting the guy OR the girl and you drive off into the sunset together, perps behind bars sans cinnamon buns.

I don't know what it's about but I know it will be the only movie that ever existed. 

Holligay is the lesbian chief of staff to you somehow being elected President and she's basically running the country while you're the charming face of the administration

Nerd and cowgirl meet at a bar, justifyingly murder some gross dude, go on the run from the law and have a life-changing road trip, on the way Nazis are punched

carrying a delicate object through a forest after your helicopter goes down

Thelma and Louise, but instead of dying, your deaths are clearly faked and you live on a ranch in Montana with your respective spouses and animals. One time a cop comes by the restaurant/bar you joint own with Doc and says, "You look familiar." Doc, in perfect lesbian, answers, "Jet's just got that criminal look, on account of how much she'd love to steal my cheesecake recipe. More pie?"

Queer Eye with a Straight Goy. The two of you do the show but in your own special ways.

Doc Holligay is the wild-west no-nonsense sheriff. Jet Wolf is the all-fun cyberpunk cop from the future. They punch nazis and argue about food. It ends as a tv series ala B99.

Your lives are already a buddy film, don’t get greedy.

Hands and socks.  You know how it ends.

See Grumpy Old Men for details.  How does it end?  Badly.

I can't imagine the premise, but I'm pretty sure the planet explodes.

A Coen Bros film. It ends poorly.

Wait? You're not already living this now? 

REI HINO

REI HINO

Sure. Why not?

HINO REI

<3<3<3<3

REI HINO!

Rei who? ;)

REI HINOOOOOOOOO

Plush Is being hugged by Zoisite in your banner.

MINAKO AINO

MAKOTO KINO

The best

SOCKS

MICHIRU KAIOH

It's time tooo.... REI! THAT! HINO!

sponsored by Here! curry

LOVES USAGI LOVES REI LOVES USAGI LOVES REI LOVES USAGI LOVES REI LOVES USAGI LOVES REI LOVES USAGI LOVES REI LOVES USAGI LOVES REI LOVES USAGI LOVES REI LOVES USAGI LOVES REI LOVES USAGI LOVES REI LOVES USAGI LOVES REI [THIS REPEATS A LOT A LOT AND IS GLORIOUS] [...] LOVES USAGI LOVES REI LOVES JETWOLF

(THE REAL ONE)

Isn't how you spell Makoto Kino!

THE REAL ONE™

obviously

IS NOT A RHINO

In conclusion: Rei Hino

Rei Hino is giving this Giftening finger guns

BEAUTIFUL, STUNNING, SHOW-STOPPING, TALENTED, AMAZING, WONDERFUL

Hot stuff, lights my fire, blazes it regularly. I am out of fire jokes.

PASSION FLAME, SAILOR MARS

These hot feelings are C'EEEEEST LAAAAA VIIIIIIE c'mon rei-chan why aren't you singing along

IS THE BEST (I know who I'm talking to)

Ara!

DID DOCTOR HOLLIGAY PHD NOMINATE THE OPTION OF TALKING ABOUT MICHIRU KAIOH FOR 6 HOURS!!

If Hot Pocket were to plan One Last Heist, what do you think would be his objective? What would be Mina's role in his master plan?

Master Hot Pocket seeks BREAD. His friend and loyal companion, Mina-pup, acts as a distraction, as he has learned the humans are easily distracted by cute. While she does her sworn duty as Best Friend and Cutest Goodest Girl, probably with lolling tongue and glee at all the pets she receives, he picks the locks on the newly childproofed pantry, and Master Howard H. Pocket FEASTS AS NO CAT HAS BEFORE.

Every bag of flour in Montana; Mina runs distraction with her adorable puppy eyes

Open every container, leave none unmarked. Mina is the lookout who greets whoever comes and is completely ineffective at her job.

TAKE ALL THE FLOUR. Do it straight from the source: FlourCo Inc. What does a 10-pound cat do with eighty thousand tons of flour? If you can't figure that out, there's a reason he's the brains of this outfit. Mina would obviously be the bumbling lovable distraction to security or other people.

Bread.  Mina is The Face who provides distraction to the Keepers of the Bread by walking up to them and being herself.  Mina has absolutely no idea that Hot Pocket is using her in this manner because Hot Pocket is that Machiavellian, but Mina is a pocket full of sunshine in canine form and probably would just be happy to help out.

Hot Pocket knows that no mammal of the floor believes in flour anymore. It went away a long time ago. It doesn't exist. But what he also knows is that they're wrong. A lack of opposable thumbs won't hide the truth from him. He'll find the stash, and when he does, he'll stick his paw in it. Mina, with her limited climbing skills, will lick its remains from his claw and prove his discovery. As well as provide a warm place to curl up on for the aftermath of their adventure.

His goal is to sample every edible thing he can get his teeth on. Mina pulls triple duty as step stool, distraction, and scape goat

The Silver Crystal. Mina would play the role of Sailor V.

He is getting ALL THE FLOUR. Mina is a lovable distraction.

Looting all the carbs in the pantry. mina is distraction.

mina's role would be the "dopey" but talented best friend who it looks like HP is going to betray for the sake of the plan but then it all comes together when HP mounts a dramatic rescue. i dunno i'm still in film mode from that last one.

The Holy Bread Locked Within the Cupboard.  Mina would be the distraction, but she'd forget what she was supposed to be distracting from and end up leading you to him.

I am the Void. I am the Night. I am the Darkness with no hope of dawn. The Flour trembles before me in it's bleached fluffiness. It shall not escape my chaos, which will descend upon it like the Terrors of the Deep, claws and teeth and gnashing. It will howl at my claws. It will scream for my teeth, sharp and white, stars in the night of my fur. I shall tend and tear and -- Dammit, Dog-thing! How am I supposed to be terrible and terrifying with you wagging your tail and panting at me!? Oh, you found a good warm sunbeam? I guess I can stalk stuff later. I am the Void. I shall absorb the Sun's light and warmth and bring it into my Darkness where it cannot escape...

I'm new here and don't know all the complex lore of Jetwolf(fairly sure Mina is dog), so I'm going to assume that Hot Pocket is an actual hot pocket and his heist is robbing Fort Knox using Mina as his loyal stead/get away car. Then he explodes a microwave or something.

i lik the bred

Mina as the distraction while he takes one last tastes of EVERYTHING 

objective--stealing more chips; Mina--surprise betrayal 

The scene: Mama Jet's pantry The Objective: the bag of cake flour Aunt Doc made Mama Jet buy but she's never used Mina: confused but excited escape vehicle and/or scapegoat

RAIDING THE KING ARTHUR FLOUR FACTORY. Mina is of course adorable and keeps everyone's attention while Hot Pocket swan dives into the flour like Uncle Scrooge

Hot Pocket would definitely try to steal a monument, Carmen SanDiego style. Mina, of course, is the multi-talented and super cute face of the operation.

I have no idea who Hot Pocket is

HP would try to scale the tallest building in the world. Not to steal anything, just to be up there. Mina would be the adorable diversion.

It would be to get whatever food you've left on the counter. Preferably bread. He would tell Mina that he'll give her some of she acts as a distraction. She's a good dog so she does. He's a cat so she gets no food.

Truly, truly, THE GIFTENING winner is us all.

[bblueewangg]

Look! It’s [ BLUE WANG ]. They have been living in [ SOUTH ] Kingsboro for [FOUR YEARS ]. They say the [ TWENTY ONE ] year old can be [IRRESPONSIBLE ] but also [ CHARMING ], but I just think [ SHE ] looks a lot like [ COURTNEY EATON ]. ( Lo, 22, est) 

TW: death, drugs, addiction, mental illness, overdose

Bio:

Blue Kora Wang was supposed to have a good life. The ingredients were all there; Two nurturing parents, plenty of money, nice brownstone in North Kingsboro, a wonderful twin sister. But if there’s anything she’s learned in her 21 years, it’s that God loves a good joke. 

Her childhood was nice enough. Looking back on it, those years were probably the best of her life. She doesn’t remember everything, but what she does recall most was the love that she felt from her family  Nothing much was wrong back then. She always thought that she was lucky.

Her mother, Georgie, was a music professor and retired harpist. From the time they were 3 years old, she taught her girls how to play and master the harp, both of whom, to her delight, were complete naturals.

Her father, Tamati, was an engineer. He didn’t come from money like his wife did, and always felt the need to prove himself. Working for his money gave him a sense of pride, so he wasn’t home as much in the beginning. But he was a kind man, and had always been Blue’s favorite person.

Her sister, Kaia, was her best friend. Having a twin was like sharing one mind - or one soul. They never fought, they always shared, they had each other and it was always enough. Her life was good - great, even. Until it wasn’t.

One morning, while their mother drove them to school, the girls were stuck by a truck. Blue doesn’t remember much from the accident, only the feeling of holding her sister’s hand before it all went black. She woke up in the hospital with some 15 broken bones and the news that her sister hadn’t survived. She was 13.

The hospital sent her off with a list of opioids to take for her pain. It never really went away. The night terrors didn’t either.

She stayed home from school for about two months after the accident to let her body heal. Her parents never said it, but she know they found it hard to be there. They mourned for two weeks before they both went back to work full time. Blue never held it against them.

She tried to distract herself with the t.v., books, or sleep, but nothing made her feel quite as good as the drugs the doctors had prescribed. All that time alone she spent in bed high out of her mind. She didn’t realize that it was a problem. Or at least, that it would lead to one. But in the time it takes an average person to wean themselves off completely, she was doubling dosages.

When she recovered, finally, she was back in her classes. But everything felt off without the drugs. She was jittery, nervous, irritable, tired, and  had even worse night terrors. But she found a dealer at school, and the rest was history.

By the time she was 16, her parents didn’t really recognize her. She was hanging with a crowd who were no good for her, cut her hair short and dyed it a streaky blonde, and lost her spark that had since been so bright. At this point, she had tried almost every drug at least once. But after a while, she graduated from experimenting to dependence, taking pills every day and doing coke frequently. She knew it was to bury a depression that she’d been running away from for years and nightmares of pain she didn’t want to relive, but she didn’t plan on stopping any time soon. Her parents were scared that they’d lose her too - and soon at that.

The night before her 17th birthday her parents found her unconscious in her bedroom, the product of an accidental overdose. They sent her straight to a rehabilitation center for the summer in hopes that all of this would stop. And it did, for a little while. 

In the period where she was clean (and bored out of her mind), she resumed school and even picked up the harp again. It felt good how natural it all came to her. Even she was surprised at how good she was. She poured all of her energy into it as a distraction, and with time even joined a local orchestra. Nothing big or fancy, but enough to get experience and clear her head. Her parents finally felt like they had their little girl back, and it felt good to be doing something that made them proud. 

But this progress only lasted for about a year. The relapse hit hard, and she was in and out of programs for a little while. She missed rehearsals and concerts, and had to quit the orchestra.

Her parents divorced not long after. She’d blame God’s sense of humor, but she knows this one is her fault. They were never really the same after the OD. Her mother moved to Westchester to be closer to her parents, and her father moved to South Kingsboro where Blue followed. And that was that. 

After graduating at 18 with fairly good grades, and with absolutely no prospects, she started working in diners to make money. Her parents bought her a small apartment in South Kingsboro as a gift, and keep their fingers crossed that she’ll do well by herself. So far so good, but she hasn’t been completely clean. Though, it comforts her to know that her father is only a short drive away if she needs him.

Things were fine for a few years, neither great nor awful, just - fine. She doesn’t hate it here, but she doesn’t love it. Mostly she’s bored, and with Blue, boredom is a dangerous thing. 

On the night of her 20th birthday, after a few hours of drinking while out with some friends, someone offered her a pill (of what, she can’t quite remember). On the come up she got an idea that would not leave her. So, she rushed home, completed an entire application to Juilliard’s music program and fell asleep. In the morning she had forgotten the entire thing had happened.

She heard back from them a few months later, asking for an audition. She was shocked and almost didn’t go, but she did and they adored her. A few weeks later, she was accepted. Scared out of her mind, she chose to defer enrollment for the next school year. She still hasn’t told anyone about it.

She’s still working as a waitress. But she can’t help spending her tips on substances that she shouldn’t. She goes to NA meetings regardless of this though, as a promise to her father.

Personality:

She likes to be in the company of other people, and LOVES a good party, but isn’t the most open about her personal life or her problems. The less people know the better in her opinion, but she always gets a little loose lipped when the drugs kick in. 

She’s very impulsive and doesn’t ever really think about the consequences of her actions until its too late and she’s in a mess.

She’s fairly friendly and very fun to be around most of the time. She’s got a flirty way about her (she's bi btw) and a wit that make it hard not to like her, but some of it is an act. 

Blue can dance on the line of manipulative sometimes. You never really know if she’s smiling because she’s happy or because she wants a little favor. 

She’s really self destructive, often intentionally acting against her own best interest even though she knows it’s wrong.

She’s really lonely and really wants the benefits of a lover or a close friend, she just isn’t comfortable with letting people know her on a deeper level. 

Summary:

After an accident that killed her sister, Blue became addicted to drugs. After an accidental overdose, she was put in rehab and has been in programs off and on ever since. She’s a talented harpist, and was accepted to Juilliard after an impromptu application submission, but is too scared to go. She lives alone in South Kingsboro and is trying to sort her life out and not go spiraling. She private and doesn’t like to get too close to anyone, but is fun to be around even if she’s a little bit of a mess.

Come plot w me and we can work something out! Im litchrelly™  down for anything luvs like LITCHRELLY ™ anything. Exes on bad terms? Exes on good terms? Bad influences? Friends with benefits? Dealer/ buyer? An almost best friend that Blue constantly screws over because she doesn’t know how to be a good friend? Enemies? Does she know a secret about your char? Do you know a secret about her? Yum give it all and more 

[zani-is-a-stan]

suzani watches the Sherlock unaired pilot

Opening

-       This version of John looks way more old and way more dad

-       That close shot on the gun tell the viewer that John is suicidal

-       The dark silhouette of the cupid statue kind of stands out. Given how the cinematography and shot framing is a lot sloppier in this version, I don’t think this is intentional. But if it was intentional, this would be a signal to the viewer that this is a love story.

-       Mmm, pass on both Anderson’s beard and this way of introducing the concept of a Sherlock

-       This title & credits sequence is so dated

-       Anderson with no inflection is boring

-       Dinner with wine is not a great place for John to be saying he’s broke

We meet Sherlock & Molly

-       We start to see the beginnings of the geometric and precise framing that are the signature of the show in that one shot of Molly behind the glass

-       Its nice to see that Molly’s character required almost no adjustment between the two versions. Given that she was the first character original to the show instead of the books, it’s nice to see that she stuck the landing so perfectly

-       It’s starting to be really obvious how loose the editing is. There’s a lot of dead air at the beginning and end of every shot before each cut. Much better in the final version.

The lab

-       This version of Sherlock seems a lot more accurate to the book Sherlock from Study in Scarlet than the series ultimately ended up being. He’s softer, more interested in interacting with other people than the antisocial, high functioning ASD (where’s the fic that explores that?) twanging brain haver he is in the first episode of season 1

-       I want to read a take on Sherlock that discusses him as having ASD and interprets the violin playing and the mystery solving as his stimming techniques

-       The camera shots in this scene are really starting to stand out as very different from the show. It’s not just the editing which is kind of thoughtless – these shots are poorly composed and poorly planned. I don’t think it would stand out so much if the final version of the show didn’t make so many deliberate and stylized decisions regarding with the shots and editing.

The apartment

-       The extrapolation of john’s family based on the phone became much cleaner in the aired version

-       Comic sans! I mean, mrs Hudson is better than that.

-       Mrs Hudson definitely checked out john’s butt …

-       “can I just ask … what is your street?” this was very good, if repetitive

-       Sherlock needs an assistant? This sherlock has a need for human connection that the other one doesn’t – and he has a lava lamp.

-       Ugh the apartment at 221B baker st looks so much more vintage in this setup. Not a fan.

-       This sherlock definitely cares more about what other people think than the final version.

-       Mrs Hudson is a much softer, premade character in this version. I like the final version better. She seems stronger that way.

The cab ride

-       So boring. Such greenscreen. Wow.

-       not just the greenscreen. the difference in the shooting and finishing of this sequence in the pilot and the aired episode is so incredibly improved that you can hardly believe there were part of the same thing.

-       TOO MUCH SYNTH

-       Sherlock has a far too human response to john’s compliments and more doubt in how accurate his deductions are

The crime scene

-       Im glad they changed sally’s outfit, and smoothed out sherlock’s taunting of her and Anderson’s affair. Ugh I wish they’d kept sally around. This show needed more normie/casual sherlock opponents. Lack of closeups in this scene do it no favors

-       They cut the Rache/Rachel clue. And btw, I do love how this was inverted from the book presentation in the show.

-       “no, there are two women and three men lying dead, keep talking and there will be more” – this sherlock prioritizes people over mystery solving, and that’s a little more humanizing as well.

-       When he’s deconstructing the scene around the woman in pink, there’s a switch in sherlock’s voice when he’s off camera. I’m wondering if maybe that’s a stat actor reading the script for some reason, or if they recorded the dialogue and the camera angles at the same time and forgot to switch when they were editing that shot? Makes sense given how messy the editing is throughout the pilot.

-       “do you know you do that out loud?” “sorry, I’ll shut up” “No, don’t worry, it’s fine” (pleased smile) --- this exchange is so accurate to book Sherlock and Holmes

-       This is not the same sally as the first episode. I had to check because I have a little bit of face blindness and there weren’t any closeups, but it’s definitely not her. Interesting how the actress who ultimately played her changed the inflection but brought very little new to the blocking.

a bit inbetween and the pink case

-       No Mycroft, hmm. Don’t care for it. It added a lot with a really nice red herring feel.

-       John returns to his place for absolutely no reason narratively.

-       I don’t care for the red herring moment where john looks at the pink case and wonders if sally was right and talks out loud about it.

-       The end exchange of this scene is awesome and should have stayed. “Donovan said you get off on this.” “And I said danger and here you are.” “DAMNIT!” It’s very funny, and it’s a fun spar between the two rather than the ultimate resigned tolerance that series John seems to settle into by season 2.

do you have a girlfriend? a boyfriend?

-       Sherlock not eating is a brilliant touch, I think that should have been there.

-       This version of the girlfriend boyfriend conversation is far more successful than the aired version, although I prefer the setting in the aired version. It’s flirtier, and the “Everything else is transport” line carries implications I prefer to the one we saw on on the official version.

-       Sherlock knowing the cab thing ahead of time really lowers the stakes.

-       Angelo and the headless nun thing is fucking beautiful. (although angelo is a bit of an upstager) But, the change in the plot to the John running and leaving the cane behind in the final version is much more relevant to the story.

-       Ok, so the cabbie drugging Sherlock did show us that John is smart in his own right (we never got enough of that), but it showed us Sherlock fucking up in a way that is inconsistent with the show version of that character. For us to buy that Sherlock is other level super genius instead of just very smart, he can’t make this kind of mistake. If he can’t make a mistake, then John can’t prove his own intelligence. I do think it was a good idea to put the police back in his apartment now, as it gives us more interesting and fun things about those characters, and the ultimate build to the cab ride and the incorporation of modern technology really contributed to the modernizing of the adaption.

which pill

-       WHOA that cabbie did just very much threaten to molest or rape Sherlock. Although if there were no women or gay men on the script team, I can totally see the writers not realizing that this line had that connotation.

-       And this version requires a lot more explaining of plotholes with dialogue in a way that is avoided in the final verion. This is unquestionably good, because there’s nothing more graceless in filmed stories than having plot explained with words, especially by a villain.

-       Taking the pills out of the bottle looks silly.

-       Final version cabbie is better. More self-satified and mean.

-       “Either way, you’re wasted as a cabbie” is a way better line in the final.

-       Taking him out of the apartment and away from the police phone call was A+ the right choice.

-       Everyone know the best cops scream “Who is firing, who is firing?” when someone fires a shot.

i’ve got a blanket

-       Sherlock saying “Yeah, maybe he beat me, but he’s dead” is a far shot from the man who shook a dying man and demanded to know if he was right or not. Again, this Sherlock is far more human and far less computer.

-       That bit with mrs Hudson at the end was unnecessarily mean, I’m glad they cut it

-       “I’m his Doctor.” – this lines should have stayed forever.

Overall thoughts

Ok, so overall changes between the pilot and the aired first episode. Plot was a lot more polished. They scrubbed every trace of human need from Sherlock, which I think was a good choice, at least for the beginning of the show. His literal only love is his own abilities as the show airs, which leaves him with a very interesting and exploitable weakness – his arrogance, where as pilot Sherlock doesn’t seem to care all that much when he makes a mistake. We did lose a couple of scenes that had a lot of good chemistry in them, but I think the plot was much improved overall for the changes. The change of Sherlock from being casually mean to people like Anderson to swatting away an irritating fly is very successful. The focus of Sherlock’s relationship with Lestrade seems of a higher priority than Watsons a little bit, so I’m glad that changed. The lead up to John shooting the cabbie was much better in the final

Honestly the pilot doesn’t look like a pilot as much as it looks like a proof of concept piece. The budget was obviously smaller: that’s why they reused the same restaurant set, it’s why the final confrontation took place in the apartment rather than a second location, that’s why the effects are missing or budgety, that’s why the editing was low-end. This as a pilot was sold on the impact of the actors and the bones of the script, not on any of the look that would ultimately make the show what it was. The color work between the first and second version of this alone was amazing.   I also think that the hair change in Sherlock was an excellent choice. It offsets BC’s face/head structure in a way that plays into the strangeness of the character in a much better way. Similarly, the coat and scarf that he wears in the series do exist in the pilot, but aren’t really a signature of Sherlock’s on-screen shape design in the same way.

I think the only thing I would’ve kept is the inflection, delivery & read on the girlfriend boyfriend scene, and the return of the “I said danger and here you are” exchange.

There’s a lot of talk about Sherlock’s sexuality and what was cannon in the books. TV Sherlock they seem to be confused about (Belgravia as an episode left me really confused about what statement the writers were trying to make there, which implies that they’re either not completely sure either, or they’re too straight to understand what they’re doing). In the books, Holmes chooses not to have romantic relationship because it stops his brain from working clearly – it’s a deliberate choice based on the Victorian concept of sex (and women, because they are clearly only sex objects) diminishing the capacity for clear thought and mental performance. This is not the same as him being asexual or aromantic as we not aro/ace people understand the concept in 2019.

Based on the scene as it airs, the girlfriend/boyfriend scene would leave me with the opinion that Sherlock is not just asexual but also aromantic. Possibly one of these by choice rather than nature. Based as how the scene plays out in the unaired pilot, I would think that Sherlock is celibate and also attracted to John, more likely gay than bisexual. (There was quite a bit of smoldering going on in the Sherlock to John direction.)