#that one tweet that’s like ‘sometimes a man hurts every woman in his life because his soulmate is another man’
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Just for practice | kth
↳ Summary: “I think we should normalise giving head to your friends as practice.”
↳ Pairing: Taehyung x Reader, slight Hoseok x reader
↳ Genre: Smut, pwp, some plot i guess, best friend! Taehyung
↳ Rating: 18+
↳ Word count: 5.3k
↳ Warnings: swearing, lip biting, hickies, oral (both female and male receiving), rough blowjobs, spanking, fingering, squirting, big dick! Tae, possessiveness/jealousy, unprotected sex (wrap before you tap pls), dom/sub themes, Taehyung calls reader lots of pet names (sweetheart, darling, good girl), degradation, biting, slight cockwarming
↳ a/n: I’ve been having major writer’s block while writing confident :( however, i saw this tweet which prompted this lil oneshot hope you enjoy
Jung Hoseok [ 2:15 PM ]
Am I gonna see you at Seokjin’s tomorrow?
You [ 2:16 PM ]
I’ll be there :)
Jung Hoseok [ 2:18 PM ]
You’re not gonna run away from me this time, right?
You [ 2:20 PM ]
No of course not haha
Jung Hoseok [ 2:21 PM ]
Is that a promise princess?
A sigh flies out of your mouth like wind through a window and you’re shucking off your glasses in an instant. Hoseok’s texts bringing back a flurry of memories that you wish to forget.
“Do you need help with your essay again?”
Your eyes are strained when they try to focus on Taehyung, your shoulders shrug in defeat. “No, I’m fine. It’s just-”
Taehyung knows immediately, he is your best friend after all. “Let me guess, It’s Hoseok isn’t it?”
You slump in your seat while a pout is cutely drawn onto your face, you nod with dismay. “I really like him Tae, and every time we see each other, It’s like the universe has it out for me and tries to make sure I embarrass myself in front of him.”
Taehyung shuts his laptop because he knows there's no use in trying to write an essay while you speak about your utterly tragic love life. He thinks about your situation for a minute before he speaks.
“Yes, you might’ve spilled your beer on him and accidentally punched him in the eye, more than once. But, if he’s still texting you he’s obviously still into you. It’s a good sign sweetheart.” Taehyung pats your hand across the coffee table, a comforting smile adorning his handsome face.
Taehyung doesn’t know the full extent of your problem and the more you think about it the more embarrassing it becomes. So you smile back at him uttering a small thank you before turning back to your laptop.
Taehyung raises a brow, “wait, wait, hang on, something is still bothering you.”
You frown, “it’s embarrassing.”
Taehyung shuffles around the corner of the coffee table as if you’re about to tell him a secret, though it’s just the two of you in his small apartment. “Just tell me, it can’t be that bad.”
“Taehyung it is that bad.” You tilt your head at him, pulling up the sleeves of your sweater around your tiny fists. “You’re gonna laugh at me.”
Taehyung feigns shock at your words, his hands placed on his heart for dramatic effect. “I would never laugh, and frankly I’m offended you think that low of me.”
You roll your eyes, turning your body more towards him, deciding it wouldn't hurt letting Taehyung know the thoughts plaguing your mind. “Well, you know how Hoseok and I have been kind of flirty lately, right?” He nods in understanding.
“I can tell he wants more than that, you know? His touches are small but I know exactly what he’s suggesting, and don’t get me wrong, the feeling is completely mutual because trust me I want that too. Really bad.”
Taehyung hums, interrupting your soon-to-be graphic rambling. “I totally get it Y/N. Now let’s stop beating around the bush so I can help you.”
If Taehyung were a girl, this would be so much easier. You curse your eight-year-old self who just had to become friends with a boy because God, how do you even start?
Taehyung is a patient man, always giving you space before helping you but, in this situation, you feel it’s best to just rip the band-aid off. Taehyung if you can read my mind, please don’t laugh at me.
“I’venevergivensomeoneablowjob.”
You speak so suddenly, Taehyung’s not so sure he heard you correctly. “Huh?”
“Goddammit Tae”, you rub and your temples and avoid his stare. “I’ve never given someone a blowjob!”
His eyes are wide. “Oh”
You hide your face into the table while your body internally cringes. At least he didn’t laugh. “See! You do think it’s bad.”
“I’m just surprised to be honest”, he reassures, leaning back onto his palms, strong brows pulled together in thought. “Shit Y/N, have you really never sucked a dick before?”
Sure, you’ve had sex many times (most of which have been extremely disappointing) but, it seems that most of your hookups want to get straight into fucking. No foreplay, no nothing. Just unseasoned, pleasureless fucking.
A groan rumbles out of your throat, “It just never happened! They were all about that hump and dump lifestyle I guess.”
Taehyung is utterly baffled at your statement. In Taehyung’s books, It is compulsory to treat every women like a queen. Preparing and edging them the perfect amount of times to see them crumble so sensually by his very doing. To Taehyung, seeing a woman cry out his name from experiencing the most explosive, leg-shaking orgasm was always his favourite part.
This is why Taehyung is absolutely shattered for you. “So, you’re also telling me no one has ever eaten you out?” You miserably nod, “that’s actually fucking evil!”
His words do not ease you one bit as you throw your head onto the seat behind you. “The way you say it makes me feel even worse. This is the sole reason why I run away from Hoseok and make a fool out of myself.”
Taehyung doesn’t say anything, the air floating around carrying an awkward silence. You don’t really care and you don’t expect Taehyung to think of a solution. Plus, you’re already embarrassed enough.
You might as well leave and ask one of your girlfriends for help, maybe finish your essay while you’re at it. You sigh, shutting your laptop and stacking your books together.
However, the next sentence that flies out of Taehyung’s mouth makes you stop dead in your tracks.
“I think I’ve figured out how I can help you.”
Wiggling back into a comfortable seating position, you lean into Taehyung with interest. “And how might you help me, dear Taehyung?”
He eyes you nervously, his fingers fiddling with his chunky rings, “You trust me, right?”
You smile, “yeah, of course, you’re my best friend Tae.”
An exhale puffs out of his mouth. “Why not practice on me?”
You almost choke on your spit. You definitely did not expect him to say that. “Could you repeat that please?”
A new glint of mischief sparkles in his eye. “Why not let me teach you how to give Hoseok the blowjob of his life and in return, I’ll eat you out”
Your brain is having a meltdown.
“You’re fucking crazy”, you wail. “You actually want me to suck your dick?”
He brings his hands up in defence, “I think we should normalize giving head to your friends as practice, I don’t think it’s such a bad idea. Think about it, you get to learn and cum at the same time.”
You won’t lie to yourself, the proposal is tempting and in all honesty, Taehyung is hot as fuck. You will forever thank the Gods above for blessing you with the delicious sight that is your best friend. However, the proposition puts you in an odd spot.
Apprehensive about your thoughts, you state your unease, “I-I don’t know Taehyung, don’t you think this might ruin our friendship?” An exhale, “have you seriously thought of me that way?”
Taehyung chuckles, it’s deep and totally unexpected to your question. “Sweetheart, there are many things that go on inside my head involving you. And to answer your question, they’re not completely innocent.”
A startled gasp is ripped from your throat and your stomach flutters with a dangerous mix of nervousness, thrill and dare you say arousal.
Never in your life would you have imagined Kim Taehyung, your best friend since grade school, seeing you in such an inviting way. To make matters worse, It was intimidating to think about his fair share of experience and the long line of women backing up the fact that Taehyung was indeed some sort of sex demon.
Of course, you felt the same way. How could you not! The man was practically an incarnation of a Greek God. Broad sturdy shoulders that sat atop thick muscular thighs, and how could you forget his gorgeous fingers.
You’d die before you admit it, but there have been many nights where you have found yourself thinking about what his pretty long fingers could do to you. Those nights always ended with a mess of your sheets and a wetness between your thighs. It was your dirty little secret, however, it seems Taehyung also had some of his own.
His sharp eyes storm with darkness when he speaks, “don’t lie Y/N, I know you’ve had some dirty thoughts about me up in that pretty little head of yours.”
Pink blossoms over your cheeks like wildfire because he’s so terrifyingly right. “I don’t even need to touch you sometimes, one look and you’re a goner.” You gulp. “Look at you right now.” His gaze drops down to your thighs. “All my talking making you so needy, you need to clench your thighs to keep it together.”
He smiles, though it’s not his usual boxy, boyish smile. It’s dangerous and seductive almost smirking and shit when did he get so close to you? Your breathing is erratic and you have no idea how you could be so anxious yet so amorous at the same time.
Your heart beats rapidly in your ears. “This is just for practice, right?”
Taehyung curses under his breath, “just for practice sweetheart.”
You don’t get to respond.
His lips are hesitant at first when they meet yours, yet his hands say the opposite. They start at your waist and tickle their way down to your stiff hands. Ever so gently, he pries them open, intertwining his long fingers with yours, and God, did his hands feel so right.
Your nerves dissipate slowly but surely as you allow him to explore your mouth with his skilful tongue.
Much to Taehyung’s dismay, he finds you releasing your fingers from his own. Your hands flying to the nape of his neck, ultimately bringing him closer to you, deepening the kiss. Taehyung moans in delight when you tug at his long curls, you bite his lip in reply while lust paints your vision and dampens your panties.
Taehyung never knew he would miss the feeling of your lips against his when he painfully pushes himself away to situate himself comfortably on the couch. It was time for the lesson to begin.
You pout at the distance, trying to wiggle close until he motions for you to get into a particular position. Your insides swell with eagerness.
His voice is sweet and his hands are delicate when he tucks a few strands of hair behind your ear. “Get down on your knees for me sweetheart.” You obey immediately. He smirks at your sinking form. “Good girl.”
You swear right then and there your pussy had gained a working heartbeat at his words. The unfamiliar pulse thumping as if it were trying to break loose from the constraints of your sweatpants.
Your eyes are big and expectant, slowly drinking up the sight of Taehyung’s delicious figure seated above you. He sits on the couch like it’s his throne, legs spread to accompany your kneeling figure, and dominating stare pinning you down. A shiver runs down your spine.
“Wh-what do I do now?” You utter, making it known to Taehyung that he is in charge. He is in control.
Taehyung cocks his head to the side, using a decorated pointer finger to hither your hands towards him. Hesitantly, you raise both hands, lightly placing them down on his thighs.
A click of his tongue makes its way to your ears and you know you’ve already made your first mistake. Taehyung’s brows furrow, it’s obvious you need to make the next move but your brain is fuzzy and flustered.
He sighs at your confused silence, bringing your small hands onto his belt. Oh, you know what you’re supposed to do now.
“I thought you were smarter than this, how else are you meant to get my dick out, hmm?” The blush across your cheeks has definitely spread profusely from his teasing. Its once peachy pink tone deepening into an embarrassing cherry red.
The buckle of his belt jingles under your fingertips as you nervously undo them. You’re apparently too slow for his liking, Taehyung finishing the job by pulling his belt off his pants, leaving you to stare down at the large bulge covered by the fabric of his tight jeans. You thought you had your nerves under control but the way your hands start to shake is an indication that this is real. You’re really about to suck your best friend off.
Ever the observant friend, Taehyung is quick to notice the slight shake in your fingers. “Wait, stop.”
You do as he says, quickly settling your palms back on the thickness of his covered thighs. “Are you sure you want to do this? your hands are shaking sweetheart.” His voice is laced with concern, a total switch to his previous words.
Clearing your throat you reply, “oh, no, no I’m fine.” You lock eyes. “I just want to make sure I’m doing good so I can be good for him.”
Possessiveness flares within Taehyung’s chest and he has no idea why. Although he doesn’t let it show, he can’t help the swell of his ego at the knowledge that he’s the first to get you like this. Not Hoseok. Him.
So, he grins his wide boxy grin, dragging a finger down your warm cheek. “Don’t worry darling, you’re in great hands”
The commanding smirk etched onto his lips sparks a surge of confidence through your veins, begging you to finally touch him.
With a tug of your small hands, Taehyung’s constricting jeans are pried off the taut muscle of his thighs and are left to pool around his ankles. The excitement of finally being able to suck dick coursing through your body like lighting, and just like his jeans, Taehyung’s boxers are off in a second.
His cock springs, tall, hard and proud. Your jaw drops, Taehyung chuckles at your reaction. You feel an ooze of wetness pooling in your panties.
His size is nothing you’ve seen before, thick and girthy with an impressive length to match. You wince at the thought of fitting him down your throat.
The cold metal of his rings against your hands brings your attention to Taehyung’s handsome face. Without breaking any eye contact, he wordlessly wraps your hands around the thickness of his cock.
It’s warm and swells in your palm, your two dainty hands stacked on top of each other. Fingers trying so hard to wrap themselves around the sheer girth of his cock.
You’re not dumb, you know what comes next. With a sharp inhale you begin to stroke up his length, paying close attention to his facial expression to get an idea of how well you’re doing
Taehyung’s head tilts to get a better view at your hands, “grip it tighter for me… yeah fuck that’s it.”
His praise boasts you on, holding tighter onto his cock and gathering the slick of his pre-cum with a twist of your wrist. Your eyes remain focused on the way the skin moves with your hands and the way his tip glistens with arousal. You want to lick it.
“When you’re ready you can put your mouth- Ahh shit Y/N!”
He didn’t need to finish his sentence when you’re already so eager to have him in your mouth. You do what you think would feel best, sucking on the head of his cock like a sweet ice lolly on a hot summer's day. Your tongue tracing the thick circumference before dipping into his slit.
A light groan falls from his mouth as he watches you lap at the remaining pre-cum that glistens in the afternoon light. Taehyung almost forgets why he’s here, lost in your plump lips wet with saliva.
Right, he’s here to teach you how to give a blowjob. “Try and take my whole length in darling.”
You nod, taking a deep breath, your mouth opening wider to take him in as far as you can. You try to keep your throat relaxed taking him inch by inch.
“That's a good girl”, he praises, “you’re doing so well for me.”
Your knees squeeze together, acting to relieve some pressure on your aching heat. It had truly been a while since you got some serious action.
Surprisingly you’re able to make your way to the hilt of his cock, a choked gag sputtering from your lips.
A few strands of hair fall in your face, blocking your eyes in the process. Swiftly, Taehyung brushes the hair from your eyes while simultaneously lifting your head off of his cock.
You release him with a satisfying pop, your eyes wide and makeup a little smudged. Taehyung coaches you through the next steps. “I want you to try and do that again, but when you come back up, lick the length of my cock and look at me while you do it.”
Humming in acknowledgment you grip the base of his cock before pausing. “Isn’t this what you like though? What if Hoseok likes to be touched in a different way?”
An unintentional growl bubbles out of his mouth. Oh how he wished he could take your mind off Hoseok and have you screaming his name, thinking about him instead.
He pushes down his discontentment with the other man on your mind, “men are simple creatures Y/N, just making out sometimes can get them going. And judging by the way you’re sucking my cock right now, I’m sure Hoseok will be crazy for you.”
As Taehyung explains the ins and outs of a man’s brain, you don’t make an effort to stop the teasing of his cock. His words sound slurred, they go in one ear and out the other, and besides the delicious length in front of you is much more fascinating.
For the time being you stare up at him, your eyes wide feigning interest in his words, all while you grip his cock in one hand and continuously lap at his tip with a kitten-like flick of your tongue.
Taehyung finally realises that you’ve stopped listening when he feels the small yet downright sensual pleasure shooting through his cock. He grunts, pushing your hair back once again, “fuck, that’s hot. You’re so fucking good.”
His preoccupied hand squeezes the pillows beside him, the veins of his hands popping out. You do what he taught you, seductive eyes laser focused on him while your wicked tongue leaves a hot trail up the prominent vein on his dick.
“Shit Y/N you’re doing so well-”
You release him from your mouth disrupting his sentence, “can you fuck my throat?”
Taehyung swears his whole body just convulsed at your request. He looks away just so he can contain himself because holy shit.
Obviously Taehyung has thought about you being in this position, saying those words. Yet, no matter how many times he fantasizes this scenario, nothing would ever prepare him for those words to actually come out of your mouth with the most bewitching grin plastered on your pretty face.
He stutters, “I- no, I don’t know if you can take it darling.”
You grip his thighs, pout forming on those dangerous lips of yours, “please Tae, I want it. Want you to use me.”
Taehyung pushes the curls of his bangs away, a hiss steaming from his lips. “Alright, but if you feel any discomfort pinch my thigh, okay sweetheart?”
You’re impatient, “yeah, yeah, I can take your monster dick.” You place a small kiss on his thigh, “do your worst.”
His movements are all too fast, all too sudden. His fingers securing a death-grip on the mess of your hair before holding his cock up to your mouth. “You asked for it darling.”
Your mouth automatically widens, welcoming the rough intrusion of his cock as it slides all the way down your throat. A lewd gag fills the room.
A dark cloud of lust of dominance fogs Taehyung’s vision, his biceps flexing when he brings your head up and down his thick velvety length.
The room resounds with the filthy wet noises of your saliva covered lips pumping repeatedly. Taehyung breathes heavily through his nose, tilting his head against the cushions behind him. He keeps his hips still, yanking your hair at an obscene pace. A slew of curses and moans fly out into the air as he revels at the complete state of ecstasy you’ve put him under.
The heat of his member burns the back of your throat but you fucking love it. You open your teary eyes, gazing at his chiseled jaw and the way he shivers and groans above you. It only spurs you on when he glances back down, meeting your mascara ruined eyes.
It’s like a knee-jerk reaction. Taehyung harshly pushes your head all the way to the base of his cock. Your face is met with his abdomen, the hairs of his happy trail tickling your nose.
He leaves you there, and the burn in your throat rises, leaving you gagging, your throat tightening around him.
Taehyung believes after this he could never get the image of your messy docile eyes and tarnished lips out of his brain. He feels your throat constrict, “sh-shit, fuck Y/N, breathe through your nose.” You inhale. “That’s my good girl.”
He releases you from his member only to push your lips back onto him, going back to his beastly pace. “You look so fucking pathetic, you think Hoseok wants a messy girl like you?”
You gurgle around him, tears freely falling down your cheeks as you try to shake your head no. He only mumbles out a groan, his cock abruptly pulsing under your tongue like a steady heartbeat.
It's all too sudden when he releases your head off his length, a glob of drool dripping down your chin and onto your shirt.
“Fuck sorry I was about to cum.”
Although your heart swells with pride you wonder, “why didn’t you?”
He runs a hand through his messy locks, “the purpose of this was to teach you, don’t you still want to practice?”
You’re smug with your answer, “I think I’ve got the hang of it now.”
He swipes a finger under your tear stained eyes, “getting cocky now are we.”
You were cocky indeed, “well I did get you shaking under my touch didn’t I?”
He rolls his eyes, “get up you brat, I’m gonna show you what you’ve been missing out on.”
Fucking finally.
You won’t lie, you were probably most excited to finally know what it feels like to receive head. Your mind is still fuzzy from Taehyung’s rough ministrations as you slowly get up. You wobble slightly and Taehyung is quick to stabilize you with two strong arms holding the curve of your hips in place.
With his arms already around you he pushes you towards the couch, kicking his jeans off in the process.
Back flat against his plush couch you’re already stripping off your sweatpants and panties together in one. “My, my aren’t you eager”, he teases, a glint of shamelessness twinkling in his brown orbs when he drinks up the plushness of your thighs leading to your dripping cunt.
Holding your knees in the palm on his hands, he spreads them open to reveal the glossy folds on your heat. He kisses his teeth, satisfaction and hunger clear on his face. “Fuck, isn’t this a pretty sight.”
His words bring back a blush on your cheeks, you pull him forward, your lips inches away from his own. “Shut up please.”
And he shuts you up real good. Smashing your lips to his, he envelopes you into a feverish kiss, your tongues dancing the devil's tango.
His hands are adventurous, feeling the mounds of your breasts over your shirt. “Why the fuck isn’t your shirt off yet huh?” He tuts, pulling on the cotton fabric.
“I want yours off too.” You cutely mumble tugging at the hem of his shirt, to which he complies, tugging it off in one fluid motion.
You peel your baggy shirt off just in time to see Taehyung's arm flex as he takes his very own shirt off. “Have you been working out? My God Tae, you're as big as Joon.”
He inwardly smirks because yeah he’s been working out and it's clearly paying off. He doesn’t want to show his glee however, “can we not talk about other men when I’m about to eat you out.”
You chuckle, eyes trailing down his buff arms to his v-line that leads to his dick like an arrow directing you to his treasure. You bite your lip, unclipping your lace bralette, “sure, sure, let’s get the show on the road.”
It’s Taehyung turn to drink up the sight of your body. “Fuck, always imagined what these tits looked like under all those tight clothes you wear.”
He’s really feeding into your praise kink. “Well, were they what you expected?”
He sucks on one immediately and you arch your back at the unexpected pleasure. “Even better”, he squeezes them in his palms, “they’re fucking gorgeous.”
He sucks a deep hickey under your left breast, leaving you whimpering with a hand tangled in his hair. “Always imagined what you sounded like moaning for me.”
You can’t reply, his touches burning through your skin. He kisses down your sternum to your stomach until he’s hovering above your aching clit, a tantalising grin on his face before he’s diving in.
“Fuck!” You wail at the unfamiliar yet mesmerising feelings. His tongue is stiff and pointed, flicking quickly up and down your bundle of nerves.
The grip you have on his hair is deathly but it's the only thing in your reach that can ground you. He licks a long stripe down your sopping slit, keeping his sharp eyes on you the whole time.
“F-feels so fucking good Tae!” You almost scream. He cups his lips around your swollen nub sucking on it with a shit-eating grin on his face.
You’re too dazed to comment on it, reeling in the new pleasures you’re experiencing. You stare down at him, your eyes half opened and so close to rolling to the back of your head.
However, they almost completely open wide at the sight presented before you. With two long fingers, Taehyung is shoving them in his mouth, soaking them with his spit before rubbing them onto your sensitive folds.
You beg. “Put them inside.. Please.” Taehyung doesn’t make a sound only kissing your clit as he plunges his ring decorated fingers into you.
You’re so wet his fingers slide into you with ease. He groans at the sensation, his view focused on the way your cunt greedily sucks him in.
“Look at you, getting my rings all dirty you filthy girl”, he scolds watching the way your essence drips into the crevices of his intricate jewellery.
Taehyung increases the pace of his long fingers, finger fucking you into euphoria. He doesn’t stop there, his lips returning to your desperate clit in a wet mess of your juices and his saliva.
You can feel your orgasm bubbling in your stomach. It's hot and feels so unlike any other upcoming orgasm you’ve experienced. His fingers curl inside of you, his palm slapping your folds with his rapid pace and his lips don’t give any sign of stopping.
“Taehyung- Tae, I’m cumming!” You really scream this time, your orgasm taking control over your body like a demon.
You swear your eyes black out, your body shaking, a warmth gushing out of your cunt as it spazzes out.
Your chest heaves and you blink, feeling a damp pool around you. Oh God, Did you piss yourself?
“Holy fuck Y/N, I can’t believe you just did that.”
You sit up, embarrassed, an apology falling from your lips.
“You just squirted on me.”
You’re flushed, “I- what?”
Taehyung almost looks akin to a wolf hunting down his prey. “That was the hottest fucking experience of my life, holy shit I’m so hard.”
Well at least you didn’t pee on his couch. There’s a surge of overwhelming need for his cock to be inside of you. You’ve never felt this way before, it’s scary but so is this whole experience. It’s definitely one for the books.
Getting up on your knees you hold onto his shoulders, Taehyung raises a brow. “Fuck, I need to ride you, can I ride you?”
You think you just saw his dick twitch at your words. He grins, “just for practice?”
Your smile is sickly sweet, “of course, just for practice.”
His arms are strong when he shuffles into a seated position all while holding your hips above his awaiting cock.
He pauses, a flash of his normal self resurfacing. “You’re on the pill yeah?”
You peck his lips, “yes, now stuff me full.”
That’s all the confirmation he needs before he’s sinking you down onto his length.
You both let out moans of pleasure at the feeling of being complete. The stretch hurts so bad but hurts so good. He fills you up so well it has you speechless, the air trapped inside your lungs refusing to be released until your walls are comfortable around his impressive girth.
Mumbling a soft curse, you swivel your hips in slow circles, getting used to his large size. Taehyung watches you, hunger written on his face as he licks his lips and examines the way you fit so perfectly on his lap.
You test the waters, holding onto his shoulders for support. You lift your hips and settle back onto his lap. He groans at the wet squelch it makes and slaps your ass, grabbing it in his hand to squeeze it.
You pick up the speed, pumping up and down, whimpering at how well he fills you up. You keep your gaze trained on the image of his dick disappearing in your heat and pulling out with a wet sheen.
Taehyung tucks a finger under your chin, bringing you close to his face to push his soft lips onto yours once again.
It’s weird to say, but you don’t think you can get tired of kissing your best friend. He knows exactly what you want and knows exactly how to make your head spin.
With his large hands of yours, you pick up the pace, slamming your ass onto his hips. You leave his lips, kissing the side of jaw and suckling a few lovebites behind his ear.
His voice is deep and sultry, “fuck yeah, that’s it.” You wail in his hold, pushing yourself to meet his thrusts below. Your thighs burn but the pleasure burns so much hotter.
You feel your second orgasm of the night rising within you and can tell Taehyung is close too. Taehyung assists you, using his thighs to push up into you. Your juices drip down onto his pelvis and both of your breaths get heavier.
His thrusts are fast and rough, creating loud slapping noises that echo around his empty apartment. He grunts, folding his head into the crook of your neck. He’s about to cum and so are you.
With one final gasp your release hits you like a truck. Your thigh shakes in his lap and Taehyung bites at the delicate skin of your neck. His warm seed shoots inside of you, eliciting a small sigh from your lips.
Taehyung releases his hold to lean back onto the couch. He keeps his softening cock inside of you, lazily staring at your fucked out expression.
You play with his rings, “well, how did I do?”
The shit-eating grin is back. “Hmmm, I think you may need more practice.”
#ficswithluv#bangtaninn#bangtanuniversity#bangtansorciere#taehyung x reader#taehyung smut#bts#bts x reader#taehyung fanfic#jimin#jungkook#seokjin#hoseok#namjoon#yoongi#h0neypjm#mine
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ted lasso thoughts 2x07
ok. ok. ok let’s do this. ok.
OWCH.
ngl, this one was hard to watch. Nate has been my favourite main character from the get go and it is brutal to see him as we are - both because how he’s been treating other characters (Colin’s face when he insults him! Will’s hopeful little smile when he suggests the ‘Wonder Kid’ shirt!) and because it’s so obvious that what’s fuelling this behaviour is nothing short of some obviously crippling self-esteem issues and anxiety.
And how many people want to slap Papa Shelley in the face right now? Your son gets on a national paper and you can’t even acknowledge it?
There were so many heartbreaking little moments that I think are showing the cracks - Nate spiralling when he sees one negative tweet, pulling a face at the craft box, the ‘you don’t inspire, you do the job’ clearly projecting from himself - and the fact that people just ain’t seeing the problems….argh. It’s so understandable and makes so much narrative sense that Nate would go from victim to bully, but that doesn’t make it easier to see. That being said: we’re in the dark forest, we knew it was going to hurt, and I’m willing to bet the show knows precisely what it’s doing.
Also that last scene being all off-screen? Damn fine directing.
Seriously, I have so much Nate meta atm and it keeps on coming, so apologies to my followers for that.
I’m massively revisiting my ‘rewatch Colin’s scenes for sheer entertainment value’ policy after this (but hey, we always have him rapping in 2x06) but that was fully mitigated by the apology hug. I personally didn’t see this as a ‘Nate publicly pressuring Colin to forgive him’ scene so much as a ‘Nate making himself vulnerable in front of the whole team and opening himself up to public reprisals from an entire team of footballers’ scene, and Colin’s grin and immediate cuddle with Nate definitely sold it for me.
Higgins and Rebecca took a back seat today, but the jazz scatting was hilarious. And I love that Higgins is now comfortable enough to take the piss (gently) out of Rebecca’s relationship fears. (Also ‘my marriage is the oxygen that gives me life?’ SIR.)
The smoking room and Higgins bringing along a pipe was a thing of beauty.
Oh TEDDDDD. Those therapy sessions were so good to see - even if I maintain that I would actually like, you know, to see some of the actual therapy and get a full breakdown of each of our characters’ deep emotional problems - but there’s so much you can see in Ted’s avoidance, his anger, his flight-or-fight responses. There’s a lot to unearth here, and we’re just scratching the surface.
For a character who I was fairly neutral on initially, Sarah Niles was fantastic in this episode - Sharon doesn’t change, exactly, she’s still the same professional, skilled therapist, but the subtlest changes in her voice and manner show that she’s here for Ted, that she’s providing a safe space. And I love how she provides a few glib phrases - ‘the truth will set you free, but first it will piss you off’ ‘to be your mentor, I also sometimes have to be your tormentor’ - for Ted because if there’s one thing he likes, it’s a bit of wordplay. The woman knows her audience!
Roy and Keeley’s argument and make up was really well written: it was great to see Keeley as more than the ‘fixer’ of sundry problems but dealing with her own stuff, and that bath was super fucking hot. I do think Keeley could have apologised to Roy for discussing their issues with pretty much everyone but the cleaning lady, but all in all it was a lovely storyline.
Also never has the phrase ‘he’s here, he’s there, he’s every fucking where’ been more appropriate.
‘Will, do you think you could take my name off my shirt and make it bigger?’ OH JAMIE. Even though he’s changed so much, I’m so happy that in other ways he really really hasn’t. And who had ‘Jamie inadvertently fixes Roy and Keeley’s relationship’ on their Ted Lasso bingo this week?
That scene with Sam and the boys checking his messages was pure *chef’s kiss*. I love that we have a little core crew now (Sam, Dani, Isaac, Colin, Jamie, Richard, Zoreaux, Jan, and Bumbercatch) with…uh something of a hivemind and about one braincell between them. Also how very dare Jamie and Rebecca not acknowledge Ratatouille as nothing short of cinematic poetry.
Still worried about Sam and Rebecca though!
ETA: how could I forget Trent Crimm: The Independent blatantly checking in on Ted?? I was beginning to miss this man and his beautiful hair.
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to be a simp ✧ colby brock
pairing: college!colby brock x fem!reader
request: What about college colby in his frat and he acts all tough emo boy but his brothers catch him out with the reader being the ultimate simp and they tease him for it and he’s like ok and??
summary: colby’s a simp for you, but no one knows. until they do.
word count: 1,054
warnings?: talks about fraternities, some mention of sororities, mention of alcohol, colby’s a simp
note:��if you want to request I write anything, you can do so: here.
Colby Brock liked to think he lived two lives. There was the life that was known by his frat brothers, by the campus community as a whole, by the professors, by the tutors, by the staff. The one where he had his walls built up, but professed what his brothers (lovingly?) referred to as “balcony tweets”—whatever the fuck that meant. He was the emo heartbreaker, who they were all sure had a long list of “conquests” (gross) and could get any girl he wanted. But then there was the other life, the life that only two people in the whole world got to see. His mother and, well, you.
Yeah, 😍💖🤩💗🥰 you 🥰💗🤩💖😍, if he wanted to be extra cringe about it.
The woman who he had affectionately put in his contacts as “The One Person I’ll Ever Need”. The woman who got to see him cry as you watched soldiers coming home compilations. The woman who got to hear the aforementioned “balcony tweets” before his brothers could. The woman who made him feel happy, the kind of happiness he didn’t get to experience often. (Before you, he only ever felt that happiness when he joined his fraternity and when he became friends with Sam. Now? You make him that kind of happy every fucking day just by thinking of you.)
He didn’t feel like he had to be someone else around you. He could just be the soft teddy bear he is on the inside but tried so hard to shield from the world cause goddammit the world sucks. It shits on anything good and happy because everyone needs to be fucking miserable so they be a cog in the capitalist machine and—fuck!
But you took that all away with your pretty little smile. The way you curled yourself around him when cuddling. The way you played with his hair. The way you always asked before you could kiss him, always with a “pretty please? with a cherry on top?”. The way you let him be the little spoon sometimes because why the hell can’t a grown man be cuddled too?
Yeah. Yeah, you were the only person he’ll ever need.
The one downside was that his brothers didn’t know about you. Which, admittedly, was his own fault. When the two of you first started dating, he wanted it to just be between the two of you for a little bit. Not have the pressures of others placed on your budding relationship. And you understood, agreeing that telling people too quickly can result in a good thing ending before it can really begin.
And then when you went public? Well...He just didn’t his brothers. He knew how they were. He knew their incessant teasing would get to him. Fuck, it bugged him when they teased Sam and Kat, or Jake and Tara, or Reggie and Cassie. And they all took it in stride, teasing back, but...Well, Colby didn’t want you to be teased. You were his fucking queen, and you deserved to be treated with respect.
So, yeah, you never met his brothers. Which you were slightly hurt by, given how they were such a huge part of Colby’s life, and so were you, and why wouldn’t you want the two biggest parts of your life together?
But Colby liked the separation. He liked that he could be soft with you. But the moment he introduces you to his brothers, he knew he would be on edge. And he shouldn’t be!! He knows he shouldn’t be!! Because holy fuck you’re the picture of perfection and any man would be lucky to have you!! But he just couldn’t get out of his own head sometimes.
Still, he made an effort to treat you extra special to make up for his insecurities. You shouldn’t feel bad about yourself because he couldn’t get out of his stupid fucking head! And that’s why tonight, on your sixth month anniversary, Colby was taking you...bowling.
Okay. Okay.
Not that big of a thing.
But, that’s what your first date was. And Colby wanted to capture the feeling he had on that night for the rest of his fucking life.
So, he tied up his bowling shoes, indulged in the overpriced stale nachos, and laughed as you pretended you didn’t know how to bowl so he would have to teach you. And, it was as you laughed, your head falling back on his shoulder, as he “taught” you how to throw the ball that he heard it.
The stupid fucking obnoxious laughter of his brothers.
God, could they be anymore stereotypical??
He grit his teeth as you released the ball, cheering as you knocked down all the pins. You spun around, hugging Colby tightly, and planting a soft kiss on his lips. And he nearly forgot who’d just walked in when—
“Bro, what the fuck?” the ever-annoying voice of golden-retriever-in-human-form, Chad, said. “You a simp or something?”
If this were a cartoon or a cheap direct-to-DVD movie, Colby was sure there’d be smoke coming from his ears. He turned, seeing a small group of his brothers in the lane beside the two of you.
“Yeah, what about it, Chad?” Colby grumbled, his grip on your waist tightening.
God, why did they have to ruin such a good night?
“Nothing, bro,” Chad carried on. “I just didn’t take you to be simp!”
And then—
You laughed.
You laughed?
What the fuck?
“Wait, wait, hold up—are you the one who can’t hold his liquor?” you said, trying to stop laughing. (And Colby knew the exact story you were talking about—Chad, trying to impress a sorority girl, tried to chug a bottle of beer, but immediately threw up as soon as he began.)
Chad’s face burned red as the rest of the brothers whooped and hollered. “Oh, what, you think you can beat me?”
“Oh, I know I can. Just name the time and place,” you smirked.
And Colby knew then that he really didn’t have anything to worry about, after all. Because, while he couldn’t be bothered to use witty comebacks like Sam or Jake or Reggie, he knew you’d always have his back.
And for that, he was grateful.
#sam and colby#colby brock#snc#xplr#traphouse#traphouse 2.0#trap house#trap house 2.0#sam and colby imagine#sam and colby fanfic#sam and colby fanfiction#sam and colby fan fiction#sam and colby fan fic#colby brock imagine#colby brock x reader#colby brock fanfiction#colby brock fanfic#colby brock fic#sam and colby fic#colby brock fluff#colby brock fan fic#colby brock fan fiction#collegecolby#*written by: me#starrybrock
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AVENGERS M A S T E R L I S T
**SERIES**
Falling Masterlist Bucky Barnes x Fem!Reader // Collaboration with @wxstedhexrt // poetry focused fics! // TW: anxious thoughts, disassociation experiences and others so please read the warnings in each part! Based on poems written by the incredible Destiny of @wxstedhexrt! Bucky Barnes is falling in so many different kinds of ways - he’s falling in and out of his brain, in and out of reality, in and out of nightmares... and falling in love? Maybe this is the one he doesn’t want to fall out of.
Mr. Steve ( part 1 // part 2 ) Steve Rogers x Fem!Reader // Soulmate AU In a universe where your soulmate’s name is written on your wrist after you meet them, receiving a wedding invitation from her friend is just another reminder that (Y/N) has yet to find her soulmate. But maybe this wedding will be a little bit more exciting, with the help of a tiny child without a filter.
can’t take my mind off of you, Mr. Steve Rogers ( part 1 // part 2 // part 3 ) - COMPLETED Steve Rogers x Fem!Reader Steve Rogers and (Y/N) used to date. Emphasis on the used to. But when an important date from their relationship comes up, it stirs up some emotions too. As if to add to the fire, (Y/N) bumps into an old friend who suggests that maybe Steve’s feelings towards (Y/N) aren’t quite gone. And even though it’s hard to admit, especially because she has a new boyfriend, maybe (Y/N)’s feelings aren’t gone either.
Must’ve Been the Wind ( part 1 // part 2 // part 3 // part 4 // part 5 ) - COMPLETED Bucky Barnes x Fem!Reader // Song Inspo: Must’ve Been the Wind by Alec Benjamin // requested TW: mentions of abusive relationship that (Y/N) is involved in, not too graphic in my opinion but please be wary reading if it may trigger something for you. The girl in the apartment above Bucky’s seems to be in some sort of distress, though she insists that Bucky’s just hearing things. The two bond quickly and soon enough, Bucky wants to rescue her from a situation that she insists isn’t there. Is he just hearing the wind? Or is it a cry for help?
Unlovable ( part 1 // part 2 // part 3 ) - COMPLETED Bucky Barnes x Fem!Reader There’s one other person besides Steve that makes Bucky feel comfortable in the era he’s not supposed to be in. She makes him feel safe, never pushes him to do anything, and that smile always makes his stomach flip. But a situation without clear communication leaves both Bucky and (Y/N) unsure of if the other feels the same about them.
**Domestic/Homely!Steve Collection ( Steve Rogers x Fem!Reader ) :
Home After months without hearing from his wife and daughter, Steve just wants to be home. He doesn’t care if he could be hurt from his fights, he just wants to see his little girl and the woman he loves. (The beginning of my Homely!Steve Collection!)
Grocery Shopping Steve wants to help out any way he can at home since he’s gone so often. But grocery shopping without a list can be a little stressful, especially with a little mischievous girl.
A Kid’s Imagination When (Y/N) goes to pick up Sarah from school, she’s met with an odd response from the teacher about an announcement Sarah made to her classmates. Rather than talk to Steve about it, she decides to have a little fun with it.
Santa Claus Steve’s back from a long mission and all he wants to do is be with his wife and little girl. Thankfully, they’re not too far from home… and Steve has the perfect Christmas plan to surprise them.
kidnapped.... or pretzels? Steve wakes up in the dead of night to find an empty bed beside him. His mind immediately goes to the worst case scenario as to what could’ve happened to the love of his life, (Y/N).
Dance Recitals If there's one thing that Steve Rogers loves, it's watching his little girl learn how to dance. So he goes out of his way to make sure he doesn't miss too many of her practices. Now, he has to find out how to not miss her first dance recital...
** Stay tuned for more! Send in a request if you think of some cute Dad!Steve Rogers prompts!!**
**ONE SHOTS**
Dinner and a Show Steve Rogers x Fem!Reader // done for a writing challenge // prompt: “This is one of those moments when I tell you something isn’t a good idea and you ignore me, isn’t it?” The one where Steve impulsively insists on proving that Y/N’s date for the evening is trash instead of figuring out his feelings for her, meanwhile, Bucky learns that food is way overpriced lol
accidentally ruining relationships Bucky Barnes x Fem!Reader Y/N spends the evening desperately looking for answers about her love life with her close friend, Bucky. Maybe the reason her relationships aren’t working out is because her heart belongs to another.
A French Kiss Steve Rogers x Fem!Reader // Alternative Universe Fic // based on a tweet Y/N came to Paris with a plan: take a photo with a cute man next to the Eiffel Tower, just like how her and cheating ex-boyfriend had always planned on doing, and make that son of a bitch jealous. Thankfully, there’s a super cute blond guy who just so happens to be nearby.
Makeshift Thanksgiving Dinner+ Steve Rogers x Fem!EastAsian!Reader Steve Rogers is beyond nervous to finally be meeting his girlfriend's parents. Especially when it's a meeting for Thanksgiving dinner... though (Y/N) neglects to mention until they're almost there that her east asian family doesn't usually have a typical 'American' Thanksgiving dinner... (Super fluffy I promise :))
Take a Hint Steve Rogers x Fem!Reader (Y/N) literally just wants to go out and have a good time with her girls. So why do guys seem to never take ‘no’ for an answer? To try to prevent more annoying encounters with men who can’t take a hint, (Y/N) slips on two rings onto her left hand and assumes the married life. It’s all well and good... until someone sees the rings as a challenge. Enter from stage right, our hero.
boardroom fantasies NSFW, 18+ only, S M U T // Steve Rogers x Fem!Reader // done for a prompt challenge // prompt: “You wanna have sex….here? Now?” Steve can’t help how tight his pants get when (Y/N) is working nearby. While everyone else goes out for drinks, he pulls her aside to show her that the Accounting Guy who keeps asking her out isn’t who she should be with.
Holiday Kiss Bucky Barnes x Fem!Reader // Christmas fic Bucky is a little tired of Christmas traditions for the day but with (Y/N) around, there’s just one more tradition he’d like to give a try.
Anxiety Steve Rogers x Fem!Reader // TW: lots of anxious thoughts based on my own so be careful if this is a trigger for you! Today’s the day Steve comes back from a mission and (Y/N) is beyond excited to see him. But when you have a little Anxiety monster whispering believable nonsense in your ear, it’s hard to get out of your head.
5 ways Steve Rogers says I Love You (and 1 way he doesn’t) Steve Rogers x Fem!Reader // sad ending so if you don’t wanna be sad, don’t read the last bit lol Steve Rogers loves you and here’s just a collection of ways he shows it. But not everything has a happy ending.
Healthy Competition Steve Rogers x Fem!Reader // Bucky Barnes x Fem!Reader // Sam Wilson x Fem!Reader // SURPRISE PAIRING // requested It’s not every day that the boys are all infatuated with the same human being. So when they realize they’re all falling head over heels for one girl, Steve insists some ground rules need to be laid out. Little do they know, there’s one person already that (Y/N) is swooning over.
home is a person Bucky Barnes x Fem!Reader // Post inspo: “Someone asked me to describe home and I started talking about your hair colour and the sound of your voice and the taste of your lips and how your skin feels like. Until I realized they had expected to hear a place.” When asked what home was like in a conversation about their past lives, Bucky Barnes immediately thinks of something other than his 1940s home. He thinks of her.
The Waitress Steve Rogers x Fem!Reader // done for a writing challenge // song prompt: “If things get worse, will you still be here?” 405 by This Wild Life Steve Rogers has finally worked up the guts to ask out the super cute waitress at the diner he frequents… except it’s hard to ask out of a girl when you’re a) already super nervous, b) unsure if it’s rude to ask her out, and c) when you have Dumb and Dumber insisting they tag along.
Fate’s Ribbon Bucky Barnes x Fem!Reader // Soulmate AU Fate ties a ribbon to every baby that’s born. It’s black to everyone else but your soulmate, who sees it as bright red. Bucky Barnes doesn’t want a soulmate, especially after becoming a completely different person than he was in the 40s. But you can’t run away from what Fate has planned for you.
Happy Moments Steve Rogers x Fem!Reader // prompt list // requested Prompts: a perfectly brewed cup of tea and dust floating in golden sunlight Steve Rogers has a few happy moments stored in his brain for when times got tough. He thinks about each of them and how they’re each a part of him. But in this moment, this place, he was happiest.
Probability Steve Rogers x Fem!Reader Steve Rogers is an insecure little bum sometimes. But he’s 75% sure that the girl of his dreams shares his affections… okay 70%…. maybe less….
Fate’s Sense of Humour Steve Rogers x Fem!Reader // Soulmate AU Everyone is born with a soulmark, generally a signature or some sort of mark to define who this person was. And when you meet your soulmate, your mark gets darker and darker. Everyone is born with this. Except Steve Rogers. He had practically given up on finding someone to be with without a soulmark, until he wakes up from the ice to find a faded grey signature on his arm.
Jealous (Strong) Steve Steve Rogers x Fem!Reader // requested Steve Rogers, the man behind the shield, knows that his strength only came from an injection. He isn’t a Norse god, how could he compete against Thor who seems to have all of (Y/N)’s affections? Steve Rogers is a jealous man. A strong jealous man who just keeps breaking things.
Studying Anatomy Steve Rogers x Fem!Reader // requested Steve loves his girlfriend very much, so when she practically begs for him to help her study for her anatomy test, how can he say no?
Young But Sure Steve Rogers x Fem!Reader // requested Sometimes people have different wants for their future. Sometimes their future includes a pet, sometimes it doesn’t. Sometimes people want to live in the country, and some just want to live in the middle of the city. Steve Rogers wants kids… and he assumed that his girlfriend did too.
Nosebleeds Steve Rogers x Fem!Reader A Stark Industries tradition was that every year, interns, agents, admins, and all the Avengers were asked to join in on a volleyball tournament. And every year (Y/N)’s team wins. She expected to have some fierce competition from the Captain’s team… she expected wrong.
Coming Home Steve Rogers x Fem!Reader No matter how long he was gone, (Y/N) always slept on the couch when Steve was away on missions so she could be the first thing he saw when he came back. Steve is happy to be home with the girl he loves.
Kiss (* Endgame Spoilers *) Steve Rogers x Fem!Reader He just looked so hot, the fire in his eyes, ready to fight. (Y/N) just can’t help herself, she just needs a kiss before they go off to their potential deaths.
Blue Steve Rogers x Fem!Reader Steve in blue is too much to handle whilst sober, (Y/N) decides. So while attending Tony Stark’s birthday party, (Y/N) doesn’t stop to drink her anxiety away making for entertaining company for Steve.
Pizza and the Medical Student Steve Rogers x Fem!Reader // College Roommates AU // requested (Y/N) just wants to study for her final. Steve wants to keep her happy. Bucky wants them to just admit their goddamn feelings for each other already.
**Super Cringy-ish Older Fics I Wrote that I Don’t Have Good Summaries For**
#avengers#avengers x reader#avengers x you#reader insert#masterlist#fanfiction#marvel fanfiction#marvel fanfic#avengers fanfiction#avengers fanfic#steve rogers#steve rogers x reader#steve rogers x you#steve rogers x y/n#captain america x reader#captain america x you#captain america x y/n#bucky barnes#bucky barnes x you#bucky barnes x reader#bucky barnes x y/n#james bucky barnes#winter soldier x reader#winter soldier x you#new masterlist#one shots#series#marvel x reader#marvel x you#marvel x y/n
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You know, I wasn’t going to write about this, but I just got the most insulting message about all this — so screw it, here I go:
I talk a lot about accessibility problems in daily life, but not typically about the unmitigated hell that is air travel. I have been insulted, touched without my permission, accused of faking, asked intrusive medical questions, gotten homophobic lectures from attendants I couldn’t get away from, been instructed to walk multiple times — and two of my personal wheelchairs have been broken.
All that said, the worst service I have received in my life has been from American Airlines. They consistently screw me over. They “forget” to preboard me. They “forget” to bring me a wheelchair. Heck, once I requested a bathroom break and I came out to find my wheelchair assistant gone. I had to sit there in the Cincinnati airport alone, frantically TWEETING AT THE AIRPORT, until a gate attendant took pity on me and took me down to baggage herself.
But if you really want to know how bad flying with them is, let me describe my experience flying with them a week and a half ago for a work trip. (In other words, I was not allowed to choose my airline.)
I arrived at the Philadelphia airport. I asked for assistance several times and was told to sit down in a waiting area and someone would be by shortly. I sat there for 45 minutes, at which point the person who told me that came by and it became immediately apparent that they’d forgotten about me. 20 minutes later, I finally got my wheelchair. In the end, I almost missed my plane.
The attendant, when he came, did not introduce himself or really talk to me at all. When we got to security, he refused to touch my belongings (attendants need to put our belongings on the conveyor because, y’know, we can’t get up there) and demanded I get up and do it myself, something I’ve literally never encountered before. In the end, he wheeled me over to the belt and made me strain to put my things on it because he was acting like my belongings were diseased.
When he rolled me up to the scanners, he did not ask me about my ability to walk, just demanded I get up. I requested a non-metal cane (because my own had been put on the belt) and he got very huffy about it, but another TSA agent heard me and gave it to me. After I finally got through the scanner, he did not bring the wheelchair over to me so I could sit in it, and I was forced to walk across the room to him. Yeah, it hurt.
I was handed off to like… six different attendants throughout the course of my trip to the terminal. At one point, I was forced to walk to get onto a shuttle bus. The wheelchair was not loaded on with me. When we arrived, there was no wheelchair waiting. I was told to wait on the bus — but then the driver started pulling away with me trapped on the bus. The driver was behind glass so I had to literally bang on the windows of the bus so someone would notice and stop the bus. Instead of bringing the wheelchair to me, I was expected to climb off the bus, walk inside, and get a new one. Wow, accessibility.
I finally had to demand a bathroom break because no one asked me if I needed to eat/drink/pee and I’d had to hold it for two hours at this point. I was told to walk to the bathroom. After I refused, more huffing, but someone got a wheelchair to walk me over.
FINALLY, TIME TO BOARD! Psych, I got outside, was told it was a tarmac boarding (something that had not been told to me ahead of time) and that if I’d wanted assistance, I should have preordered an aisle chair, something that’s typically only necessary to request if you’ll need a wheelchair onboard. I have never had to request one and, again, didn’t know it was a tarmac boarding, so I didn’t request it. I was repeatedly asked if I could walk “at all” and if I was sure I couldn’t just walk up. At this point, I was so frustrated that I literally started to cry. In public. They finally took me up.
Note: this was the ramp I’d been expected to walk up. As I was hobbling through the section too thin for the wheelchair, the woman grabbed my cane to “guide” me. I almost fell down.
When I got to Cincinnati, my tweets had apparently been heard. The manager of Prospect, the company AA uses for wheelchair assistance, was waiting for me. He was very nice! He gave me his card! The attendant told me to ask for him by name! I was not happy, but somewhat pacified.
I get to CVG three days later to go home. There is no wheelchair desk at check-in. I see another woman in a wheelchair, so I ask where she got it. Her daughter “found it”, and the woman had already missed her flight because she hadn’t been able to find assistance in time. I talked to two other women who just started walking despite the pain they were in.
I finally figure out where to request a wheelchair. A dedicated desk? No. A passing employee? No. I was supposed to stand in the check-in line. I got upset, so someone at another airline suggested I just cut the line. That was what I had to do, and I felt like a dick.
This line, in fact:
Waited, waited. Finally got a wheelchair. It was not the man I’d been told to request. Whatever. He was nicer than the man at PHL, but I still had to go through a genital pat-down at TSA. (As in, “please spread your legs wider for me”.) Yeah, that happens almost every time when you’re disabled. Fun times. Once I showed signs of being upset and they made me do it twice, without any kind of support to hold me up. Note: I am a sexual abuse survivor.
Finally get to the gate and the attendant leaves. I am in full view of the agent desk. It starts getting close to boarding and no attendant in sight, despite me specifically telling them I’d need help boarding. I got another passenger to go up to them and ask them for help. I was told an attendant would be coming soon. It came time to board, and I was left across the room. I literally started shouting across the room for help. The gate agent looked me in the eye and told me that she wasn’t ignoring me, that I’d be preboarded. SPOILERS: I wasn’t preboarded.
This meant that when I finally got down to the entrance of the plane, I had two options. I could go wait in the line that forms in the aisle while people are putting their baggage up. This is very painful for me, so instead I waited at the door for the people in front of me to sit down. A large line formed behind me because they still kept calling groups to board and again, I felt like a dick. I got to cry in public again.
Boarding in CVG, I didn’t have to do a tarmac boarding, but I still had to disembark that way in PHL. This time, the flight attendants called ahead to make sure I’d have an aisle chair. Those are super fun, by the way, you’re strapped in like Hannibal Lecter and wheeled backwards. :’)
I demanded a bathroom break once we got off. Note: I say “demanded” because no one ever freaking asked because god forbid they treat you like a human. You’re usually expected to just sit there at the gate for a while until a new attendant can take you to baggage, but I’ve taken to asking if they can leave me over by the bathroom instead because I’ve almost wet myself. (I often cannot get to the toilet on the plane.) So anyway, I was taken to a companion restroom. The door didn’t close all the way. Yeah, it was completely broken. This wasn’t a stall. It was a COMPANION RESTROOM WITH A DOOR. If the door doesn’t close, the entire terminal can see in. Instead of taking me to another stall, the attendant just “stood guard” outside the door. So that was super-fun and not nerve-wracking at all.
The attendant then proceeded to get lost in the airport and didn’t believe me when I told her the right way to go. It’s not like I’ve ever flown out of my own home city before or anything, wow.
Now, this was worse than usual. I often have problems with all airlines (Delta was the one that kept smashing up wheelchairs, shoutout) but American is just By Far the worst. I usually fly Southwest because I’ve had far fewer problems with them at PHL (and I don’t have to pay extra for a seat that’s accessible for my needs) but sometimes AA is the only airline that’ll take you where you need to go.
I make this post for two reasons. Number one, I have to fly American again in about a week (again, I did not choose this) and I’m almost sick with worry. I was so stressed out and pained after the last trip that I came home, took very strong painkillers, and collapsed for like a day.
The other reason is that AA finally got back to me about my complaints from last week. They accused me of not asking for assistance ahead of time (I did; I even talked face-to-face with a manager to order accommodations) and snottily told me that I could have asked the gate agent for assistance. So number one, they only answered one of the MANY issues I had. Number two, they implied it was all my fault — despite me doing everything I was supposed to do. Number three, despite the many broken accessible areas, despite the poor treatment by employees, they still hold firm to this “you need to order things ahead of time or you’re screwed” line.
So I ask you. What if you don’t know those policies? What if you’re a child or a first-time flyer? What if you have a short-term injury and aren’t used to this? What if, like that woman in the wheelchair who missed her flight, you’re elderly and ESL and deeply confused?
The pain I am put through, the embarrassment and dehumanization and physical strain, is awful when I fly. To be blamed for it is worse. But the worst knowledge of all is that I am privileged. I am white. I am young enough to know how to complain on social media. I know my rights. I know to leave several hours in case I am mistreated. Like that old woman, like the women I saw walking to their gates, there are so many people who are not in that position. They will be victimized.
A manager approached me at CVG to apologize as I landed. No one will apologize to those women. They will be victimized. It’s not right how disabled people are treated at airports, and frankly, it’s not legal. But they know that our voices are not listened to and so they know that they can get away with it. Do you know how AA found me from my angry tweets? All they had to do was look at the DM history. I’ve sent them so many complaints over the years. They haven’t changed. They don’t care.
And as much as my body hurts after experiences like that, my heart hurts more. I’m so tired of people not caring.
I know this is a long post, but they messed so many things up that it had to be long to list them all. Please feel free to share this post -- or even better, let American Airlines know what you think about it. God knows they didn’t listen to me.
#this is a long post but they did a lot of things wrong!!!#ableism#disability#air travel#american airlines#long post#please this one is really important to me
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A Tale of Two Videos: Why the Images of George Floyd Dying Broke the Nation
Why is the footage of George Floyd dying beneath a policeman’s knee the video that finally broke the nation?
I actually think the story of our current public chaos stems from two videos, brought to the public at nearly the same time, that outline both ends of a system which elevates white, moneyed people at the expense of everyone else -- especially those of us who are darker than blue.
In one, a white woman threatens a black man by telling him she will call the police and lie about him threatening her life. In another, a black man is pinned down by several police officers, pleading for help to breathe, until he dies.
One video shows the nightmare of overpolicing black bodies; losing your life because a store clerk thought you tried to pay with a counterfeit bill. The other shows a white woman well aware of the power that such overpolicing gives people like her when she calls 9-1-1. She knows – and assumes the black man she’s threatening also knows – whose interests will be defended, possibly with lethal force, when officers arrive.
Amy Cooper’s confrontation with Christian Cooper and the death of George Floyd have revealed the full scope of white supremacy non-white people live with every day in America. We have been talking about it for a long time; I wrote a book about it in 2012. But it is a reality many other Americans will not believe, until someone grabs a cellphone at a fateful moment, records it, and shows it to them. Again and again.
Because we have seen these videos before. We saw Philando Castile, a black man filmed in his last moments by his girlfriend, shot by a police officer during a traffic stop. We saw John Crawford, a black man who was going to buy a pellet gun at WalMart, shot to death by police within seconds of their arrival at the store after a 9-1-1 call. We saw 12-year-old Tamir Rice, playing with a toy gun in a park, gunned down within seconds of a police car driving on the scene.
We saw Levar Jones, a black man who survived being shot by a cop during a traffic stop at a gas station as he was retrieving his license (the reason the cop stopped him? He was driving without a seat belt just before turning into the gas station.)
Eric Garner. Darrien Hunt. Botham Jean. The list of black people hurt or killed by police under suspicious circumstances is long and infuriating. How can a white college student suspected in the murders of two people who inspired a nationwide manhunt get taken into custody without incident, while a black man accused of passing a bad $20 bill winds up dead on a street, killed in broad daylight while cellphone cameras captured it all?
Beyond the frustration of the rising body count, there is frustration at the high price America demands before it will believe there is a problem in the first place.
People of color constantly have to rip open their wounds to prove to white America that racism is killing us. The videos are a blur of bottomless tragedy; a parade of pain where victims are often left screaming at officers: What did I do? Why won’t you help me?
And every time a new video emerges, black America asks that same question of the nation.
The challenge we face is summed up in a statistic from my book. I quoted a September 2011 study which found 46 percent of Americans believe discrimination against white people had become as big a problem as discrimination against racial minorities.
A study published in November 2017 by NPR, the Robert Wood Johnson Foundation and Harvard University’s T.H. Chan School of Public Health came up with different numbers. In that study, 55 percent of white Americans said discrimination against white people exists and 63 percent of white Americans said local police were just as likely to use unnecessary force against white people as non-white people.
This is the question at the heart of so many political and social conflicts in America: The fight over the very existence of systemic racism and prejudice.
It’s one reason conservative-oriented Fox News Channel is often so tone deaf on issues of race. Many of the channel’s pundits resist the idea that systemic racism against people of color is a serious issue. Lots of conservatives have decried George Floyd’s death; but the question of whether that death is a result of a few bad cops acting out or a result of systemic overpolicing and overpunishing people of color is the real dividing line in this crisis.
When Fox News anchor Tucker Carlson interviewed Ted Cruz on the unrest in Minneapolis, both men were careful to note they were horrified by the actions of one officer, while extolling the bravery of most police officers. But what about the notion that police officers work inside a flawed system that can shield bad cops and make it tougher for good officers, regardless of their race, to stop something terrible as it is happening?
This “one bad apple” idea – a notion expertly dismantled by comedian Chris Rock years ago – was also advanced by White House National Security Advisor Robert O’Brien Sunday on Jake Tapper’s CNN show State of the Union.
“I don’t think there’s systemic racism,” O’Brien said during one exchange with Tapper, before praising “99.9 percent” of police officers. “But you know what, there are some bad apples in there.”
Given all the videos we all have seen of black people hurt or killed unfairly by law enforcement in recent years, that sure seems like a lot of bad apples. And again the question rises: How many videos do you need to see, before you consider another possibility? How much pain leads to contemplating another explanation?
Of course, Donald Trump has only made a volatile situation worse. I think his actions are summed up by a phrase I read or heard someone else say about him years ago: He can’t help saying the quiet part out loud.
So when Trump tweeted about the unrest in Minneapolis on Friday, he called protestors “thugs” – a word sometimes used as demeaning code for unruly black people – and dropped the phrase “when the looting starts, the shooting starts.” That’s a saying traced back to a speech by 1960s-era Miami police chief Walter Headley, often accused of racist policing tactics during the civil rights era.
In another tweet, Trump promised protestors who came close to breaching the White House fence would be “greeted with the most vicious dogs, and most ominous weapons,” invoking another terrible image from the 1960s, when segregationist police would use attack dogs to break up civil rights marches.
The quiet part. Tweeted out loud.
As cable TV news was filled with reports on looting and unrest in cities across the country, I was struck by a tweet from celebrity comic Chelsea Handler, who posted “Something for all white people to think about. Reflect on our privilege and ask ourselves if we’ve ever had to protest for the lives of our white brothers and sisters.”
With all respect, I suggested something a little different. Perhaps white people should find one element in their lives that supports or reflects white supremacy: that Fox News-loving relative, the pal who posts terrible things on Facebook or the boss/coworker who says awful things about non-white people when he thinks they aren’t listening (guess what: we usually know, anyway).
Find one element and do something to address it. Do what you can to dismantle the system where you can.
Beyond that, governmental leaders of all stripes need to learn that platitudes and the “one bad apple” philosophy will not satisfy people who feel like an endangered species in their own country.
Don’t make us rip open another wound to prove something we have been telling you for a long time. Maybe this time, when black people say they need help, you could just listen. And then help.
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Movie Review: Birds of Prey
Birds of Prey is absolutely a product, and Grrl Power, as a brand, is being used to sell it. To deny this was a factor at every stage of production would be credulity beyond reason---the characters frequently point it out, managing to work comments about the power of women and the horribleness of men into conversation about every ten minutes. It just so happens that it works. The movie’s operating on the same turf as hundreds of flicks where one team of hard men takes on the world and wins, seducing or dominating any women they happen to come across. It’s just that the roles have been flipped.
If you’re expecting more, you’ll be disappointed. The plot’s as thin as they come. Harley Quinn (Margot Robbie, also a producer and chief motivator in getting the movie made) has, sometime after the events of the godawful Suicide Squad, been given the boot by the Joker, who is never seen outside of animation or brief silhouette because Jared Leto is presumably expensive. Without the protection offered her by Gotham’s #1 crime figure, it’s open season on Harley. Text flashes on screen to break down what she’s done to piss off each new assailant, and some of the offenses are genuinely funny. Eventually, though, she realizes it’s too hot for her to handle, and in exchange for her life agrees to track down a valuable diamond for twisted small-time crime lord Roman Sionis (Ewan McGregor). The diamond is nothing but a plot device which serves to bring the other characters into the fold. There’s aging police detective Renee Montoya (Rosie Perez), who was passed over for promotion in favor of a man. Dinah Lance (Jurnee Smollett-Bell) is a singer at Roman’s nightclub and later bodyguard, whose inept colleague Zsasz (Chris Messina) almost immediately loses the jewel to a teenaged pickpocket (Ella Jay Basco). Mary Elizabeth Winstead is a crossbow-wielding killer tracking down underworld figures. Not a single bit of this matters in the least---it’s all there because the movie needs a reason, however flimsy, for these people to be out there fighting against and eventually with each other.
The fuel of the film is energy, not plot. With respect to the talented cast, two of its members bring most of the heat: Robbie and McGregor. Robbie previously played the role in Suicide Squad, where she and Will Smith were the only reasons not to walk out. Her co-stars aren’t as dull this time around---Christina Hodson’s script has a few good ideas for them, like Winstead’s frustration over her superhero name. Without Robbie’s Quinn, however, the team would be largely standard (the ending offers a convenient way to remove her from the sequel, which also provides a convenient reason not to make one). She mercifully puts paid to the idea that her “relationship” with Joker, long idealized by comic fans who confuse regular abuse with love, is a good thing. Robbie gets the most out of the character, breaking the fourth wall and causing low-key mayhem with a lot of profanity while secretly wishing for a more ordinary life.
McGregor, in turn, is perfect as the villain, and it is to the credit of director Cathy Yan that she seems to have mostly allowed these two characters to do their thing---no amount of micro-managing could be responsible for Sionis’s deeply disturbing-yet-magnetic mad criminal, who gets a clearly sexual charge out of having people’s faces cut off and struts about in pink shirts like a maniacal parade float. When he eventually puts on the character’s titular black mask, it feels like performance art. I don’t typically read cast lists going in, and was surprised to find someone of McGregor’s caliber, known for playing heroes, in the role. He’s usually got a fairly relaxed style, a sort of Aw, Shucks leading man in the vein of Jimmy Stewart. Tasked with playing a scene-chewing baddie, though, he licks the plate clean and orders seconds.
When Martin Scorsese said superhero pictures were amusement park rides and that they had their place, I feel like this is the sort of movie that exemplifies that comment. It’s not there to suggest new ideas to you, to take you into the souls of any of the characters, or even to try out new concepts in technical filmmaking, It’s there to offer the target audience exactly what they came to receive, and is very careful to disguise or omit anything that might get in the way of that. As an example, many of Harley’s stunts---blowing up a chemical factory, drunkenly assaulting nightclub patrons, charging down a supermarket check-out line with a full cart---are, in keeping with the character, snap decisions, and if she did them in real life would be incredibly likely to get women and men hurt. The film makes sure to only place men in the path of these rampages. At times you can hear the screenwriter’s voice, saying “Okay, we made sure not to alienate anyone we want to impress with this scene.”
Normally I might kick more about such things, but then the movie is only doing what testicle-centric action pictures have been doing since the dawn of film: carefully arranging things so that the heroes don’t do any serious or lasting harm to anyone or anything which might affect our identification with them. It happens every time John McClane mows through city streets in a truck or a snowplow or whatever, and miraculously only the bad guys get hurt; no accidental flattenings of a family minivan here. That places Birds of Prey not so much as female empowerment---which is more the goal of Wonder Woman or Captain Marvel---but as female catharsis, as the kind of power fantasy normally aimed at men but now being offered to women. Men who think the very existence of such a movie is political would do well to remember they do not think that when Liam Neeson and his particular set of skills single-handedly end sex trafficking without once harming an innocent bystander.
Verdict: Recommended
Note: I don’t use stars, but here are my possible verdicts.
Must-See
Highly Recommended
Recommended
Average
Not Recommended
Avoid like the Plague
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https://www.facebook.com/ryanmeftmovies/
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https://twitter.com/RyanmEft
All images are property of the people what own the movie.
#margot robbie#Ewan McGregor#birds of prey#movies#batman#joker#rosie perez#Mary Elizabeth Winstead#cathy yan#DC comics#comic books#black canary#jurnee smollett bell
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Review #1: The World of the Married
It has been a crazy roller coaster ride. This drama was really good that hooked everyone who watches this, thinking “What would Sun Woo do next?” etc. Let’s admit we had so many questions in mind while watching the drama. The endings of each episode shocked us every time as more and more revelations gets unfolded. But at the end, they gave us a realistic ending.
I started the drama because of a good friend of mine. She recommended it to me saying “You should watch it! It’s really good!” *in tagalog* and I also saw a tweet saying “This will surpass SKY Castle’s ratings for sure!” Take note, I saw that tweet just after the first 2 episodes came out. It was THAT good.
And because of that, I started watching.
What hook me to the drama was the ending of the first episode. It was fast paced. As a kdrama fan, who would have thought that Sun Woo would know her husband’s affair right away? What would happen on the next 15 episodes if she knew it right away? Those questions popped in my head after watching.
It was different. And I loved it.
Episode 7 for me was the trigger point. I think we all can agree to that. It was one of a hell roller coaster ride because in that one episode, we cried, we got angry, probably our blood pressure went up, we were anxious, we smiled a bit maybe, then got angry again. It really shook the whole kdrama fandom.
Let’s talk about the characters. Come to think of it, the characters in that story actually exists in reality. We may have not encountered them, yet, but there sure is one or they can be a representation of someone we know.
Moving on to the ending, there were mixed emotions because it wasn’t the ending they wanted to see. Most of the people probably started watching this because they think it would have a “revenge” theme. But the drama didn’t give us what we wanted. It went exactly how they wanted to be, which I think was realistic.
We could feel at some point that Ji Sun Woo still loves her husband but she couldn’t bare the pain of being betrayed and cheated on. It was too much for her to handle that all the love and effort she gave would be put to waste because her man had another woman. The pain of betrayal really ate her up. Honestly speaking, we can’t blame her for this because we are also like this. Even if that person backstabs you, betrays you, you still love them. We sometimes go back to the person and even forgive them. But Sun Woo, she didn’t held him for too long even if she wanted to. Why? Because he lied to her. Sun Woo asking Tae Oh to be honest with her if he had another woman was the turning point for her. In my point of view. But the moment he lied, that’s when she snapped. She actually didn’t want to divorce him for their son but since he lied, she said “Fuck it, I’m going to divorce you, you cheater, liar!” and throughout the drama, all she got was pain. She was hurt trying to protect her son from everyone.
This part of episode 16 showed Ji Sun Woo’s personality. Yes, she’s strong but she has a soft heart too. Like what I said, she loves Tae Oh so much. I guess she couldn’t bare to see the man she loves be like this, trying to take his own life for being in that state. But of course their son, Joon Young, wouldn’t feel the same way. Like what other people say, he’s the real victim here. And I agree to that. No child wants their parents be separated unless one of them becomes bad or violent.
Anyway, this was longer than I expected. Before I end this, I just want to congratulate each and everyone who has been part of this drama. They’ve all worked so hard and I just can’t help but clap for them and praise them. We will definitely miss having them on our Saturday-Sunday or Friday-Saturdays.
Lastly, Kim Hee Ae for daesang!
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Jenna Marbles Didn't "Do Blackface"; Here is How Cancel-Culture Broke the Internet’s Adult in the Room
On May 31, 2020 Jenna Marbles, a well known Youtuber with about 20.3 million subscribers tweeted out in regards to African American’s rights to life and the Black Lives Matter movement. Marbles stated that “This is not a political issue, this is a human rights issue.This is systematic racism and oppression at the hands of law enforcement in our country. We want justice and we want change. It shouldn't have happened once and it should never happen again.This is not a discussion”. Almost a month later, though, Jenna Marbles released a video on her Youtube channel vaguely titled “A Message”. Her subscribers would come to find when watching this video that Marbles was officially quitting YouTube over messages she had received asking her to address videos that were made in 2011 and 2012 for their “racist” content, as well as asking her to apologize. Marbles obliged, officially ‘canceling herself’ as some have said. Most of her fans are concerned about the break that Jenna Marbles is taking from the internet. Most even begging her not to leave Youtube permanently, but, there are bigger issues within this whole debacle that are being overlooked.
Mainly, how did we get to the point where the current generation (which yours truly is a part of by the way) is so sensitive, that we harassed, intimidated, and bullied potentially one of the biggest voices on Youtube for the Black Lives Matter movement off the internet for an indefinite amount of time?
Don’t worry dear reader, you probably are wondering what could have possibly caused such a thing. Well, as most media outlets will tell you, Jenna Marbles quit youtube, and in turn the internet, because of accusations of her “doing blackface”. Surface level this sounds bad, doesn't it? It almost seems like her getting driven off the internet by a vocal minority almost seems expected, but remember, this is only surface deep. There's a whole bunch of stuff under the surface that needs to be unpacked, stuff that exposes why those who went after Marbles are, to put it lightly, hypocritical, or if you want it put bluntly, full of it. All of them though, have gone too far. Dear reader, this is a prime example of how the cancel-culture we have created is toxic slacktivism that gets us nowhere, and diminishes real world issues, and inevitably has broken one of the internet adults in the room.
The video that Marbles addressed in her apology that brought on the blackface accusations was one in which she did an “impression” of Niki Minaj. Here's the thing though...she was overly tanned at the time, filming in low lighting, and was wearing a cheap, acrylic, neon pink wig. With all factors combined, it becomes clear that none of this was “blackface” as the slacktivist warriors claim, it was just really bad filming technique. At the end of the video, Marbles even claims that it was “just a joke and that she loves and respects minaj”. We see in this clip one the wig is off, that Marbles was a spray-tan junkie at the time, which was common for girls in their 20’s about a decade ago.
Marbles also went on to apologize for a rap video she did, once again about a decade ago, for an original song called “Bounce on that Dick”. The rap was about toxic masculinity and the misogyny that toxic masculinity encourages. The lyrics express how men constantly brag about penis size or their attempts to sexualize women is ingrained in society's toxic notions of sexuality and masculinity. In this video Marbles, done up as a stereotypical asian man raps "Hey Ching Chong Wing Wong, shake your King Kong ding dong,". In her apology she admits it was racist and wrong and that she has privated the video because of the hurtful stereotype it portrays. Still though, it is being used against her even after apologizing.
Marbles also goes on to mention some of the other private videos on her channel. Claiming that she herself found most of them to be expressions of the internalized misogyny she held within herself back then. All of the videos she mentions in her apology have been privatized instead of deleted, showing in a way that Marbles is not going to pretend like these things didn’t happen, but she is also actively making sure that the videos cannot offend anyone anymore.
For context, all of the videos that she discussed were around 8 to 10 years old as of this year. Meaning that in the oldest videos, Jenna Marbles would have been 22. Most 22 year olds at the time made mistakes, Jenna Marbles is not an exception to the rule, especially since the internet was becoming a vast place where anyone and everyone could express their thoughts and opinions. Sadly though, it seems this vocal minority that took it upon themselves to harass Marbles for an apology in the name of social justice think that just because she is a public figure, that at 22 she should’ve seen that in 10 years, this would come back to haunt her. The social justice slacktivists that seem to think they have done good in this world also forgot that in 2010, that was the humor of the time. Jenna was participating in humor that, back before cancel culture was really a thing, was considered harmless. She was doing impressions right along Shane Dawson’s Shanaynay, a Ghetto caricature that frequently appeared in videos on his first channel ShaneDawsonTV, or NigaHiga’s fake infomercials that would sometimes contain Ghetto or Gangster impressons and over the top asian impressions. Jenna was right there in terms of misogynistic or sexist stereotyping becoming a joke with Smosh, which compared a “Just Dance” game character to “A Skinny Ron Jeremy”, or comparing soft McDonald's fries to what the penises of men with erectile dysfunction would look like. Needless to say all of these creators couldn't see a decade into the future. It was acceptable to joke about these things back in the day in terms of Youtube culture. Since everyone in 2020 is now overly sensitive to decades old content, though, it is enough to get a creator “canceled”, even if they have shown significant improvement over those 10 years.
This vocal minority deliberately targeted Marbles, and pulled up videos from her past back up in an attempt to find something, anything problematic with her. Mind you, this is someone who’s most exciting, recent content was hydro-dipping a pair of crocs, acid washing old sweatshirts, and throwing a birthday party for her greyhound, complete with treats for the dog, and a framed picture of Jerry Sinfeld as a birthday gift. Those who contacted her about her past and demanded an apology are directly responsible for what happened. They can claim it was Jenna’s choice to leave as much as they want, but would Jenna have made this choice if she weren’t harassed and bullied to the point where she felt her very existence on Youtube was hurtful? Would she have walked away if she weren’t scared that anything she could possibly say would inevitably offend someone? Most likely, the answer here is no. Instead of educating, or politely correcting past errors in private direct messages, these people decided it was their god-given right to demand an apology for videos that were made 10 years ago. They know that these videos and mistakes don't reflect the Jenna Marbles we all knew for the past 3 years, the one that actually changed and grew from it all.
These people seem clueless that their crusade for clicks and apologies they can turn around and deny under the guise of “the creator not meaning it” are diminishing every aspect of real-life issues and movements. If this continues the way that it is, if Smosh, or NigaHiga, or Shane Dawson are next in line for the cancel-culture call out machine. If they’re next to be accused of deliberately offending people, and when they apologize being told what their intentions were by internet strangers, who’s going to be there when they need big creators to back up their cause the most? The answer is nobody, nobody with a platform will be there to support them.
These people seeking to call out and cancel big name celebrities and public figures for their “racism” are ultimately going to hurt the Black Lives Matter movement. If anyone, celebrity or everyday citizen were on the fence with their support and they saw the Jenna Marbles fiasco, do you think they would be willing to support these movements? Especially in the case of Jenna MArbles, who openly defended the group before the accusations and cancelling began? They probably would be running for the hills. When we let people get away with being toxic, we are complicit in cancel-culture, If we are calling someone out for something that happened a decade ago, if we feel the need to air out their dirty laundry, without first addressing that the ones doing the aring out may have their own dirty laundry, then we let hypocrites get away with their hypocrisy. If you honestly support the Black Lives Matter movement, you would understand that change comes through education of the self and others, through protest, through showing those in power that we will no longer stand for their oppression of the minority. What does not bring about change is liking comments that harass people for mistakes made a decade ago, by canceling anyone over these mistakes, by driving a woman away from a platform where millions could’ve heard the message that she was trying to spread because of the entitled and toxic personality that these people seem to possess. All of this is driving people away from a social justice movement that is trying to bring about change, and is silencing those who are trying to be heard. Those who participate in this kind of toxic cancel-culture, are making movements like the Black Lives Matter movement an utter joke to those who are trying to understand, or worse, those who like life the way it is, who like their privilege, and want movements like this to be undermined.
In the end, it should be believed that those who called Jenna Marbles out OWE her an apology. Your toxicity drove away a proponent to a movement that could have made a difference. You made a woman who has continually educated herself over the last decade up and leave because you refused to believe that change was possible. These participants also OWE an apology to their closest Black Lives Matter chapter, for they need to understand how much their participation has diminished the message and work of those trying to actually make a difference. Maybe after this experience, they will realize that making a change doesn't happen through cyber-bullying. Perhaps, these people who participated in the cancel-culture that drove away Jenna Marbles will realize that they haven’t done anything to better themselves until they pick up a book from a Black author, or actually take to the streets and march for what should be a basic human right. Besides, maybe marching will also give these people a long-needed lesson on how it feels to have your speech repressed, and how discouraging it is when others won’t listen to what you have to say, just like how they did not listen to all of those apologies they demanded get thrown their way.
For now though, sadly, we get to live with the ramifications of the actions of a few. As long as Jenna is off the internet, there is one less platform bringing the much needed attention to a much needed movement. So, thank you cancel-culture, you silenced someone who has grown and was using their privilege to speak up for the good of those who cannot speak for themselves by claiming they were the very thing they were speaking out against. We all hope you're proud of what you did, that you feel superior for bullying someone. Since you like to cause ramifications like this to come to be, we hope that you ride off this high for a long time, specifically so you leave the rest of those using their platforms and privilege for good alone.
#cancel culture is toxic#cancel culture is stupid#cancel culture#jenna marbles#jenna#youtube#youtuber#blacklivesmatter#blm#hard to swallow pills#truth#truthful opinion
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To All the Characters I’ve Overly Identified with Before: Borderline Personality Disorder and Attachment to Fictional Characters
It’s been a month, and I’m still not over how Game of Thrones ended. I’m still not over the way that a character who, throughout the previous seventy something episodes of the show, was only ever ruthless towards people who were deserving of her wrath (within the context of westerosi justice because let’s not forget everyone’s favourite man of honour Ned Stark decapitated a young man for running for his life in the first episode), suddenly massacred a whole city in the penultimate episode. I’m not over the way that writers who spent the previous seasons showing that they were capable of translating the moral ambiguity of George R.R Martin’s characters from page to screen, got lazy and left us with a character whose actions became impossible to defend right as the show was ending. I’m not over the way that such a beautifully complex character who endured so much hurt and trauma was reduced to nothing more than a “crazy woman” by a couple of male writers in her final moments. I’m not over the fact that Emilia Clarke put her heart and soul into the character and did everything she could to bring Daenerys Targaryen to life for David Benioff and Dan Weiss to both literally and figuratively assassinate her.
I think those feels have been felt by a lot of Game of Thrones fans since the show ended. God knows I’ve watched enough youtube video essays and read enough articles and liked enough tweets reiterating the sentiment. Daenerys Targaryen was, in my opinion, the best character on Game of Thrones. I wasn’t angry because she didn’t end up sitting on the throne (though my boy Drogon made sure nobody else ever would either and I guess I can get behind that), I was angry because all the balance that made her character so great was thrown out the window in order to progress the story of her male counterpart and bring a show that probably could’ve done with another 2 seasons to an end. Dany has always had a dark side, she is the “fire” that the title of the book series refers to, but throughout the show, we’ve never seen her indulge that side to the point of no return. We’ve seen her wrestle with it and use it to exact punishment on those who deserve it when needs be, and that was part of what I liked about her. Not to go all feminist essay on anyone’s ass but we don’t usually get to see women in TV who are celebrated for their powers of intimidation, and I liked how prior to season 8, the narrative never made female characters like Dany or Arya or Brienne out to be monsters for killing people the same way that basically every single man on the show did at one point or another. I liked that sometimes she was a little excessive because it made sense, she did have “dragon” in her, and she still had lines she wouldn’t cross, clear values and principles; she fought for the innocent, for women and for children, and for freedom. On a personal level, I loved her because we watched her go from a lonely, scared and vulnerable girl to a strong, ambitious and self-assured woman and that was a trajectory I wanted to relate to.
And then all of a sudden, without any justification or build up at all, she’s a mass murderer of the same “downtrodden” people she always claimed to fight for. Fuck, I’m thinking. I literally watched that episode through my hands because I couldn’t believe what I was seeing. When I say I cried on and off for about 3 days after I watched the final episode, I’m not exaggerating; I only need to see a screen cap now a month later or an interview with Emilia Clarke and I’m off again. It literally felt as if I was mourning the loss of a real person. But this isn’t the first time I’ve had this kind of attachment to a character. Daenerys Targaryen was probably just the last in a long list of women I overly identified with.
I’m not much like her at all really, I’ve burnt myself from taking the film off my microwaved lasagne and not moving my thumb away from the hot air in time (lmao), however, I think I saw parts of myself in her journey and traits that I wanted to have, thus, I latched on. Before Daenerys Targaryen there was Spencer Hastings and before her there was Cassie Ainsworth and then if we’re gonna throw it all the way back, there was Hermione Granger (and some other characters I was more mildly obsessed with along the way, Katniss Everdeen, Bree Van de Kamp and Cosima Niehaus, I’m looking at you). I still love all those characters now but when their respective shows or films were actually current, I was completely obsessed. I spent my 16th birthday at the Harry Potter studios on the outskirts of London with my family, forget birthday parties or meals out with my friends. I wished more than anything that I had 2 best friends that loved me unconditionally and I did my best to emulate that drive and intelligence and work ethic everyone associates with Hermione. I told myself I was just like her even though I lacked the confidence to put my hand up in all but one of my classes and last time I checked, was just trying to conquer GCSEs not fight an evil wizard snaked hybrid man or whatever Voldemort is. I identified with the loneliness and the need for control that I saw in Cassie, and was like “oH eM GeE, tHat’s sO mE!” at Spencer’s perfectionism. When I was speeding for my exams (and then, unfortunately, for long after), I felt spiritually connected to that whole Pretty Little Liars arc where Spencer started popping adderall on the daily even though I could really only wish for someone to care about me enough to stalk me like A did and the worst possible outcome of my all nighter was not taking in enough content to bullshit my way through a 30 marker.
They would understand me, they would be my friend. They represent me. That was the baseline sentiment of my obsession. And I think that’s the borderline part of me jumping out. See, such a huge part of BPD is feeling unwanted and misunderstood and forgettable and really, deeply lonely. Like it’s a kind of loneliness I think you feel like an actual person can never really fulfil because the (faulty and not necessarily reflective of reality) thought pattern is that they’ll lose interest and leave you sooner or later. Fictional characters are always there, until the show gets cancelled or the character gets killed off, at least, and then comes the completely disproportionate tidal wave of grief. They exist in a different world too, a one that feels a lot less dangerous (even if it’s actually way more dangerous, I mean I really wouldn’t last five fucking minutes in Westeros) and detached from the often chronically muted reality of BPD.
Then there’s the trouble with the sense of self, part and package of BPD for most, which facilitates, you know, thinking that a genius witch or, like, any character in skins (because in hindsight as great as that show was, WHY DO NONE OF THEM HAVE JOBS YET SEEMINGLY AN ENDLESS SUPPLY OF DRUGS AND PARENTS THAT NEVER SEEM TO CARE WHERE THE HELL THEY ARE!?) resembles you as a person in any way. Though I suppose I’m learning recently as I begin to reflect more on what I enjoy and value, I’ve never had much more than a vague idea of what my positive qualities are, so when I saw them fully realised in a character it was a treasure trove of mannerisms and traits and ways of carrying oneself to adopt. It becomes a mould into which you can squeeze the ball of meh-ness and uncertainty you feel you resemble. Now I’m realising that although it might take me a little more time and a lot more effort, it’s much more rewarding to become the very best version of myself, but back then, I suppose I didn’t recognise why I was doing what I was doing.
I only got diagnosed with BPD and started learning about it when it was 19, so all the years before that were pretty much spent unaware of the reasons why I had these quirks. As I “recover” (I suppose that’s the right word) and I get back into hobbies and spend more time with friends, I feel like I’m beginning to discover more and more of who I am. I’m starting to accept that there are positive things about me and plenty of things for people to like, right here in this world, not some fictional one.
I still love characters way too much and get overly attached and invested in TV shows but even that doesn’t necessarily have to be something to be ashamed of. When I’ve got into *ahem* discussions with people online about characters before, I’ve occasionally gotten the “why do you care so much, it’s not real life!” in response, and I mean, there’s definitely a point to be made if your passion for something is causing you to lash out at real life people with real life feelings. But when you’re not, when it can give you hours of discussion and entertainment and can drive you to make real positive changes in the world too, what’s wrong with passion? There’s nothing I love more than having a conversation with someone who I can tell really loves what they’re talking about, so why should I be ashamed of having the capacity to become deeply invested in things too? I think as long as it’s not taking over my life as I have allowed it to do so in the past, there’s nothing wrong with having passion for fictional things or for anything, for that matter. As long as it’s not something fucked up, like idk, white supremacy or Rick and Morty (JOKING).
I don’t regret loving all the things I loved because being a huge Harry Potter fan for so many years did give me an escape when I absolutely hated myself and couldn’t find much enjoyment in real life. I hope that if I do have children one day, they’ll love it too, maybe not quite as much as I did but enough for it to give them all the joy it gave me, all the same. So in summary, yeah, fuck David Benioff and Dan Weiss (lmao, I’m joking, they’re just shitty original screenplay writers who could probably do with a class or two on how to write female characters), but also, understand before you make fun of someone for being overly invested in something that there’s probably a good reason for it and that, at the end of the day, they’re usually not hurting anyone. I’ll probably still be stanning Daenerys Targaryen and pretending season 8 episode 5 didn’t happen until the day I die. Let me live, okay?
Lauren x
#bpd#harry potter#Hermione granger#Emma watson#cassie ainsworth#skins#gameofthrones#got#antigot#DaenerysTargaryen#daenerys targaryen#emilia clarke
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We all take things personally because we are all, well, people, aka, persons. We live our lives through our own eyes and experiences, right? This is how people argue with one another, whether that’s in real life or online. “In my experience,�� or “In my humble opinion,” is how most of these debates begin.
What if you view things from another’s’ perspective? As the saying goes, “Walk a mile in someone else’s shoes.” In this age of controversy, that’s mighty difficult, particularly from a political or religious perspective. I’m constantly amazed at the responses some men give me about being a childhood sexual abuse and rape survivor – what they would have done in my situation, 🙄when they cannot comprehend what it was like for me (at age eleven) or in college.
It can be quite frustrating to explain my perspective and experiences to people who have absolutely no comprehension of what it’s like to live through these experiences, and to be treated as if I’m to blame for what happened.
One of the most effective ways I’ve learned to not take anything personally is by learning and using The Four Agreements, a small yet effective code of conduct by Don Miguel Ruiz. Don’t Take Anything Personally is the Second Agreement. I’ll break it down for you here with examples and how to apply it to your own life as a survivor.
Let’s deconstruct.
Taking Things Personally Causes Frustration
Take my example above: if a man says to me, “Why didn’t you fight back?” which is a typical, ignorant answer from a non-survivor who understands nothing about how the brain reacts to trauma, I become frustrated because I want to educate him with facts and science. Facts and science do not work on someone whose intent is to denigrate and victim-blame me.
The onus is on me to take a breath and examine the intent of the person who is interacting with me:
What’s in it for him?
Does he want to learn more about sexual abuse survivors and trauma?
How the brain reacts to trauma?
How he can help others who have been raped or abused?
Since the Third Agreement is Don’t Make Assumptions, I have the choice to continue interacting with the person and attempt to have a meaningful, educational discussion to move the narrative forward, or I can shut it down and move on, saving myself the possible frustration of what could potentially upset me further.
In an argument, each side wants to defend their position because we feel we must be right in order to win. Decide what ‘winning’ is going to cost you.
I have the choice, here. I have the agency to own how I take comments from this man (if at all – the Block and Mute buttons are our friends on social media). If I’m having this discussion with someone in real life, I can decide to end the discussion or walk away if it’s not serving me or causing me frustration.
I can draw a boundary because this person’s comments are not about me at all – they come from his lived experiences or viewpoint.
And this is the key to not experiencing frustration when healing from sexual assault – what others say they believe in reaction to our truth is on them, not us.
Taking Things Personally Lowers Self-Esteem
Based on one survivor story:
Let’s say your mother tells you she doesn’t believe another family member sexually abused you as a child, and it crushes you. You find yourself alone and desperate to make her believe you at all costs. You spend years in therapy, yet it doesn’t help. You’re at odds with her over every small thing because this big thing looms large over your entire relationship. Understandable.
You starve yourself. You sleep around. You drink and dabble in drugs. You can’t keep a job. You self-harm. All because your mother, the person who is supposed to be in your corner, of all people, doesn’t believe you. When you look in the mirror, you hate your reflection. You speak so negatively to yourself, even your closest friends would be appalled (all common for survivors, by the way).
Trace that back to the fact that you have taken her disbelief personally. You’ve pinned all your hopes toward healing from this trauma onto one person: her. When in fact, healing depends on someone else entirely: YOU.
If someone isn’t treating you with love and respect, you are allowed to walk away from them.
This is also a boundary, and yes, part of not taking anything personally. What this mother did is terrible, absolutely. What this survivor needs is to stop looking for support from someone who refuses to give it, and realize she’s worthy of self-love and support from a community of survivors and therapists who will help her embrace her in healing.
This isn’t woo-woo shit. This is reality. If the people in your life aren’t bolstering your self-esteem, it’s on you to take action to change those circumstances, not them. If they don’t believe you, you can still seek help and support. Healing isn’t dependent on other people believing you – it’s dependent on you getting the support you need and deserve. Toxic people won’t give you that, so don’t give them anything.
I’ve been in this situation in the past with men. I left them. Cutting ties is the best thing.
Taking Things Personally Creates Conflict
We get defensive when someone calls us out on something they don’t agree with. Our lived experience is different from someone else’s. Intuitively, this makes sense. We fight for what, in our eyes, is right. Remember this:
Nothing other people do is because of you. It is because of themselves. Even when a situation seems so personal, even if others insult you directly, it has nothing to do with you. What they say, what they do, and the opinions they give are according to the agreements they have in their own minds. Their point of view comes from all the programming they received growing up. ~ Don Miguel Ruiz
I see this so much on social media, don’t you? I get caught up in it myself, especially with regard to victim-blaming survivors for being assaulted and abused or raped. I cannot, and will not, ever accept that it’s ever a survivor’s fault for a perpetrator committing a crime. We never blame a woman for being car-jacked or robbed at the ATM, do we? So why do people blame her for being raped? It’s mind-boggling to me. So yea, it feels personal.
And yet…I know in my heart, it’s not. People who victim-blame are conditioned by their own families, peers, news, media, and social media to take a stance that makes sense to them and their point of view, and that has nothing to do with me. Arguing with them, providing facts, sharing my experiences, etc., does nothing to help change their minds.
Example: When an (in)famous YouTuber tweeted: “Anxiety is created by you” (and then subsequently deleted it because wow, so uninformed), many of his bro-dudes supported him by explaining that it’s true – all mental illnesses could simply go away if we just tried harder, worked out more, and stopped being victims.
I’ll admit, I got involved in attempting to educate some of these bro-dudes by sharing that mental illness isn’t something that goes away like a bad cold, or is a figment of our imaginations. Sure, it’s all in our heads – our brains, that is. And so on.
Oy, the mansplaining. What could I – a woman of 55 years, who has studied mental illness for over twenty years (longer than most of those kids have been alive LOL), who has anxiety, depression, and cPTSD, who has written two books about it (so far) that have been vetted and reviewed by several psychologists, who hosts a weekly Twitter #SexAbuseChat that deals with mental illness specifically for survivors of sexual abuse – know about mental illness?
Yet, you see, it didn’t matter. I took it personally. They took it personally. It was no longer about mental illness – it became more about who was right. My facts, stats, and science had nothing on their put-downs and misogynistic chuckles.
There could be no conflict resolution because our values would never align.
Once I reeled myself back in, I began writing this post. I reminded myself not to take it personally because what they were saying wasn’t about me. I reminded myself about my own healing boundaries, self-care, and how to put my energies into something more positive – writing.
Taking Things Personally Takes Energy
As I just mentioned, that interaction took enormous energy; energy I could use elsewhere. And that’s really the crux of this post. Where are we spending our energy when we take something personally? Usually, we end up in a negative loop of toxicity. That’s part of the cycle our brains play with us, a pattern we may not be aware of. Becoming aware of this pattern allows us to change it. That’s what these agreements help us do.
It hurts when people say something negative about us, and we take it personally. The wound festers; we poke at it, and peel at that scab. We’re so focused on the one comment, we shut out everything else, even the positive stuff, to the point that we’re missing out on life.
Example: In my BadRedhead Media business, I work with authors. Authors receive book reviews, oftentimes from non-professional reviewers. Sometimes, these reviews are verging on the ridiculous. That’s just the way it is. Amazon and other online retailers allow for these reviews. It is what it is. As an author myself, I, too, receive these reviews.
We tend to focus on these rare and silly one-star reviews, rather than the majority of five-star, terrific reviews. This is knowns as the negativity bias, which means our brains are hard-wired to focus on the negative, most likely due to evolution:
The evolutionary perspective suggests that this tendency to dwell on the negative more than the positive is simply one way the brain tries to keep us safe.
We’re not doomed, however. By not taking things personally, we are reframing these situations, and using our energy differently. Comments that strike us as negative could potentially be a learning experience, even if we feel offended. Always be on the lookout for a learning opportunity, or ways to utilize that energy toward something more useful.
Ask yourself these questions to refocus your energy:
What can I learn from this?
What difference will this make in my life?
How can I change what I’m doing with this reaction (or do I need to)?
What activity can do I do now to take myself out of this situation?
How can I change my thinking pattern to grow from this?
Listen, none of us is perfect. I first read The Four Agreements back in the 90s, and found it useful because it helped me make sense of a difficult situation in a corporate setting. I now find it helpful as both an author and entrepreneur, as well as a mom. Being on social media and online is a crucial part of my business, so I deal with many different types of people constantly. If I took everything they say personally, I’d never get out of bed.
If you aren’t getting what you need from someone or something, remember – it’s okay to withdraw. You aren’t a loser. Maintaining peace in your life and focusing on your healing will always “win.”
Please share your thoughts and comments below.
Do you need help right now? Please contact RAINN at rainn.org or 24/7 at 1.800.656.HOPE
***
Read more about Rachel’s experiences in the award-winning book, Broken Pieces.
She goes into more detail about living with PTSD and realizing the effects of how being a survivor affected her life in
Broken Places, available in print everywhere!
The post 4 Reasons Taking Things Personally Prevents Healing appeared first on Rachel Thompson.
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I’m just gonna vent here for a sec, about relationship stuff and youtube drama of all things
so trans YT drama might legit end my marriage????
I don’t want it to. I love my spouse with all my heart but I’m at the end of my patience.
So, Contrapoints. She’s a famous trans youtuber who we watched before she came out, and while she explored her gender as she gradually came to recognize herself as a trans woman. She’s got great production value, she does a lot of videos on the alt right, and she does a lot of socratic discussions that she doesn’t flat out LABEL as socratic discussions sometimes.
She’s also got a long history of stepping in it when it comes to nb folks and trans folks who don’t pass.
It’s been rubbing me wrong, because every time the community at large is like “Contra, this is kinda shitty, please just think about what you’re broadcasting to your 250,000+ followers”, she disappears for a while and comes back and jokes about being canceled and continues on.
Well, this time she said that people asking pronouns when she feels like she’s the only trans woman there is invalidating. And that’s super fine. Her airing that is fine. I understand how it can feel invalidating, especially when you hold up how well you pass as the main easer of your dysphoria. But she phrased it in a way that seemed kinda crapp to nb folks. So folks gently called her in, myself included, and she doubled down.
And of course, as with any drama, there were assholes and monsters tryna doxx her and actually doxxing her and sending nasty messages to people and her, threats and the usual shitbag bullshit nasty people pull.
She deleted twitter for a while, but then she came back, to promote her new video.
Where she had Buck Angel of all fucking people in it.
Buck, who was suggested by Teryn, a friend of hers and former LOUD transphobic trans person. Buck is a transphobic trans man who not only has run pyramid schemes targeting trans men, but he’s also outed lana wachowsky without her permission to the rolling stone because his wife left him for her, he’s also continually misgendered trans men he decides don’t pass, he says queer trans people aren’t really queer, he APOLOGIZES TO TERFS FOR TRANS PEOPLE EXISTING. He’s a shitbag and we’ve KNOWN he’s a shitbag for well over 15 years.
And with her truscummy tendencies, folks were like. Okay. Hold the fucking phone Nat.
Well she did a patreon q&a this past week where she said she knew buck because he looks “strikingly cis” and that’s why she’s a fan of him. She boiled down his years of scams and transphobia to “some bad tweets”, she through Harris under the bus for saying he was actually fucked up over being put in a video with a dickhead like Buck without his knowledge, and she made light of him doing good work with the mermaids charity earlier this year.
ANyway, Cis Yter lindsay ellis, one of nat’s bffs, posted this four image “”acknowledgement”” of natalie’s shit and said this:
“Why would one repeatedly fall on the sword apologizing to a community that jumps at every possibility to apply the worst possible interpretation of any perceived transgression?”
The trans community’s criticism of natalie isn’t based on “perceived transgressions”. It’s not bad faith interpretation. We fucking REACHED OUT TO TRY AND BE LIKE NATALIE, YOU’VE ONLY BEEN TRANSITIONING FOR TWO YEARS, PLEASE STOP TALKING OVER OTHER TRANS PEOPLE, PLEASE STOP CENTERING YOUR EXPERIENCES, PLEASE STOP SAYING NB PEOPLE ARE MAKING IT DIFFICULT FOR YOU TO LIVE AS A WOMAN, THIS IS KINDA BAD.
AND THAT IS THE BIG CRIME HERE.
Anyway George said I’m just “following a mob” because I dont’ want to support her fucking work anymore. He’s like gone full white knight for her, and I get it, being a NB person with a LOT of internalized bullshit, you don’t seem to care that a large amount of people have been hurt over and over and over by her words and deeds. And not just NB folks. Non-passing trans folks. Older trans women she claims are all truscum. Older trans men she passes over because they dont’ look “strikingly cis”.
One night he claimed his depression was so bad because folks were just kinda done with Nat’s shit that he wasn’t excited and food had no taste. That shit isn’t HEALTHY.
I made one post last night about Lindsay’s shitty apology and he responded TODAY, at like 4:30 in the morning, with “where’s the lie?” about the excerpt I posted.
He keeps saying i’m a hypocrite but I’m not whipping up people against her, I’m not dehumanizing her, and I only retweet stuff other binary trans women say in regards to her damn Patreon bullshit. I decided for myself I was no longer comfortable watching her shit, and I think that should be fair??? I don’t know why he’s going so fucking hard in on this, other than I know he’s attracted to her, but like. Buddy so am I, doesn’t mean I think she doesn’t need to take some fucking time back and stop being a reactionary.
Anyway it’s this thing seething inside him and I... I dunno. He fucking got on my business about it in KROGER the other night, fuckign KROGER, and no matter how many times I told him to drop it he just fucking wouldn’t!
I’m at my wit’s end. I don’t know what to fucking do.
Might just end up blocking him on twitter if he doesn’t stop. won’t stop the real-life issues surrounding this (K R O G E R), but it’ll make him get off my fuckin back.
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April is Starting Early For William Shatner
Every year, William Shatner breaks the hearts of autistic Star Trek fans by lighting it up blue for autism awareness.
Every year, fans beg him to reconsider his position.
Every year he quote tweets them with angry and defensive replies, resulting in his millions of followers also tweeting and often angrily harassing these autistic people.
Then he blocks them.
In the Twitter #actuallyautistic community, being blocked by Shatner is somewhat of a badge of honour and one that many wear proudly.
Those who, like me, are too cowardly to redshirt in, pre-block him to escape the mob.
But don’t assume that you are safe from him even if you have blocked him or he has blocked you, as one autistic woman discovered a few days ago.
It started with this tweet between a couple of mutuals.
Image description:
A tweet reading: “Ok, say a girl is to meet William Shatner. What should she wear?”
A reply reading: “A boycott Autism Speaks shirt.”
The author of that quip was blocked by Shatner two years ago for objecting to his support of Autism Speaks.
...
... He found out about it anyway.
The joke was considered quite funny and got retweeted and Shatner was snitch-tagged into this screenshot.
Did he chuckle and roll his eyes and move on?
Of course not. He’s a rich white male on the Internet.
Instead he called it harassment and boldly went where he has often gone before - he re-stated his support of Autism Speaks and said that anyone who “attacked” him for it would face “the consequences”.
For this woman, that meant a daunting tweet storm of angry Shatner/A$ fans.
And of course it opened his feed up for discussion of Autism Speaks... a month early this year!
One woman tweeted this in reply.
Image Description:
A tweet reading:
“You’re attacking us by supporting an organization that hurts us. Our speaking out against them is your consequence. Deal with it - preferably like an ally, ie by listening to us and taking on board what we are saying. This is an opportunity for you. Don’t waste it.”
Shatner then quote tweeted THAT, saying “This is a prime example of what happens. They don’t like that you support and organization they don’t want you to do they call it an attack and tell you to ‘deal with it’.”
When that woman was also stormed by his followers she locked her account in self-defence.
But he still had access to it in his notifications so he put up the screenshot so his followers could continue to read it and react to it.
He did not black out her twitter handle to protect her from the mob.
This obviously just fanned the flames and for the last several days he has been quote tweeting replies to him with defensive reactions.
Sometimes they are eye roll emojis or sarcastic claps. Other times they are stock A$ defence responses.
One of these was the oft-repeated claim that the Neurodiversity movement consists of “high functioning” people who don’t care about “low functioning” people.
Image Description:
William Shatner tweet reading:
“what I don’t hear about are those #actuallyautistic at the lower end of the spectrum. The higher end wants donation monies to flow to them and improve their current lives and stop research and studies. How is that fair to those who need constant care?”
Well... one of those people answered.
Cal Montgomery is a member of ASAN’s board of directors and one of several high support need members.
You should read his bio on their leadership page just to understand how truly boss this man is.
https://autisticadvocacy.org/about-asan/leadership/
William Shatner would no doubt classify Mr Montgomery as “lower end” of the spectrum.
He was non-speaking much of his early life and lived in institutionalize care for much of his life. He still wears diapers and needs care/companionship often.
He replied to Shatner, somehow not having been blocked as of yet.
Image Description:
Cal Montgomery tweet reading:
“Nobody attacks you because you like an organization that literally exists to eradicate a minority group.
We disagree with you because you refuse to listen to people who don’t want to be eradicated.”
Did Shatner reply respectfully to this “lower end” person who was stating their opinion?
Of course not!
Image Description:
Shatner tweet reading: “BTW aren’t you on the board of ASAN? You are listed under their leadership. So a board member of one charity is attacking another charity?” Eyeroll emoji, waving emoji.
That means he read ASAN’s leadership list which includes MULTIPLE non-speaking, high needs autistic people and yet continues to insist that it is Autism Speaks and not ASAN which best represents “low functioning” autistic people.
In other words, there is no one he will listen to or show respect for.
There is no one he will try to protect from his mob.
He never replies directly. He always quote tweets when replying so he can get back pats and defence from his followers.
...And we aren’t even half way through March.
Brace yourself...
April is coming early this year.
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Fall To Get Back Up
Request: “OK this is a bit of a stretch but can you do an imagine where the reader is like super duper famous like gigi Hadid and was dating Shawn mendes and he broke up with her and she started smoking again and he sees in it paparazzi photos and he feels bad because she looks sad but a few weeks later new photos of her and Daniel Sharman come out and they both look happy and she looks happy and yeah I know that’s super hard but Idk what I would do without your work💖⚡️⚡️”
Ship: Shawn Mendes x Fem!Reader (minor), Daniel Sharman x Fem!Reader
Warnings: fighting, cussing, fluff, angst, guilt, regret, jealousy, mentions of depression, smoking cigarettes, etc.
Notes: none of these gifs are mine, credit to owners.
Tagged: @bailey-hoover @kiralivelove @thalia-prior-of-ravenclaw@anamcg317 @bellasett @queentiffanyyy @archer-whovian-violinist@beingmadinwonderland @princessisabelle19 @violence-and-velvet @lachicadelamanzana
Third P.O.V
Nobody had expected the break up. It was huge, the only thing being talked about. SHAWN MENDES BREAKS UP WITH (Y/N) (Y/L/N)! It’s on every news outlet, can’t run from it even if she tried. Andrew was still trying to wrap his head around the situation himself. From the outside, they looked like the perfect couple, happy and healthy. Almost two years of dating, he decided to dump her for what seems no reason whatsoever. And of course, (Y/n) wanted for the situation, the relationship, to have never happened. Except nobody else would stop talking about it, wouldn’t shut up actually. She wanted to get back to her old life but the tweets kept coming in. Some were positive and others, not so much. (Y/n) tried her best to ignore all of it, find a way to cope. But in doing so, she slipped into old, unhealthy habits. She could still feel his soft lips atop hers, warm and plump as sucked down on another cigarette.
Pushing the shades up to the roof of her nose, (Y/n) pulled out another as she made her way over to the cafe to meet with her agent who’s tried effortlessly to get the young woman out of her house, away from bad habits. She knows she’s going to be pictured. There's always someone lurking around the corner, just when she thinks she’s comfortable. But upon entering the cafe shop, there’s a sense of comfort that she hadn’t had in a while. The smell of warm hot cocoa and old, torn books makes her smile for the first time in months. It doesn’t take her long to find her agent, already sat down with her favorite drink as she sported a sympathetic smile. Her agent, V, hadn’t set her and Shawn up. They had fallen for one another all on their own and V couldn’t help but admit that it was great publicity. This though, this breakup was hard.
“THIS JUST IN! MODEL, ACTRESS AND ACTIVIST, (Y/N) (Y/L/N), SEEN FOR THE FIRST TIME SINCE BREAKUP WITH CANADIAN MUSICIAN, SHAWN MENDES!” The TV screams and Shawn can’t help but look up, wanting to know if she’s doing okay after their split. The second the image displays, his heart drops. She looks pale and broken, thinner than before as she brought a cigarette up to her lips. Oh my god. . Shawn thought as his face turned pale. I did this to her. . . (Y/n)’s once beautiful and warm face was nothing but cold and lifeless. Her eyes were no longer loving and bright, more gaunty and tired circles. She looked like she hadn’t slept in weeks, months even. The longer Shawn looked at the image, the more regret and guilt he had. God, she looks so broken and sad. He couldn’t not feel for her. They were once the item, the talk of the town if you will.
It takes him a minute to actually see the cigarette. Shawn cusses under his breath at himself. How could he have hurt her so much that she slipped back into old habits? Because of it, he was sure that’s why she looked so different, so broken. It takes everything in him to not call her, to beg her to stop and come home but it’s too late. She won’t come back to him, at least he believes that she won’t. (Y/n) looks incredibly different from when they first met and honest to god she looks like someone else entirely. She doesn’t look like the girl he fell in love with. But then again, he did this to her. Maybe, just maybe, all of this could have been prevented. But it was too late.
It had been a few months since he last saw her. After being spotted in the cafe, it’s like she vanished from the tabloids completely all over again. Shawn would never admit that late at night he’d sit atop his bed and scroll through Twitter, almost praying he’d find a photo of her, some reassurance that she was okay because he would always spew a blatant lie when he was asked how he was dealing with the breakup. He wanted to know that she was happy again, that she was content. Shawn missed the way her eyes lit up when she talked about something as simple as flowers, or the way the sun almost seemed to touch the ocean as it peaks up from down below. This ritual continues to happen for the next few days, that is until new pictures start to float around the internet, photos he can’t ignore. There she is, looking more beautiful than the day Shawn met her. Her eyes are wide and glowing, brighter than before. Except this time, she’s not alone. They don’t shimmer that way because of Shawn anymore, they twinkle because another man that wasn’t him.
She’s with a man that looks vaguely familiar to him. The guy was either an actor or musician but he didn’t have to look hard to bring a name to the face. Daniel Sharman, actor on the TV show, Teen Wolf. Even though Shawn is straight, he can’t deny that the guy is a handsome man, built and toned with light brown hair and a mix of both blue and green eyes. His jaw-line could literally cut a diamond and for some reason, the longer Shawn looks at the photos, the more angry he becomes. He hates the way Daniel’s eyes linger on (Y/n) as he wraps his hands around her waist, lovingly. How the young man peppers her shoulders with faint kisses and laughs when she giggles. They looked more happy and content than her and Shawn ever’d been. He hated how affectionate they were with one another, made his stomach turn with jealous disgust. Clicking on one of the videos from the twitter handle, he scoffed as Daniel twirled (Y/n) around to The Way You Look Tonight by Frank Sinatra. The comment section was over-flowing.
“THEY LOOK SO CUTE TOGETHER!”
“SHIP OF THE CENTURY!!”
“i honestly can’t wait to see them get married. like, i want a man who can look at me the way Daniel looks at (Y/n). #totallyjealous”
“mom and dad? mOm aNd dAd? MOM AND DAD!! THAT’S MY MOM AND DAD!”
(Y/n) can still remember the night she first met Daniel. Forced to attend a party she was sure nobody wanted to be at, she’d finally had the chance to slip away from the crowded scene in hopes to have another smoke. As she brought the deplorable stick up to her lips, sucking in slightly, a voice from behind called out to her. “Ya know, smoking that much will shorten your life-span. It’s killing those pretty lungs of yours.” Glancing over her shoulder to find the source of the voice, she hadn’t recognized the gorgeous man in front of her despite a faint familiarity. “And who are you? My father?” She says, sarcastically. “I ain’t got much of a life anymore, doll. Might as well pick up the pace.” Though her voice was joking, there was a hint of truth to which Daniel could clearly see, making his heart hurt for the young woman. “What makes you think you ain’t got a life?” He asks, genuinely curious to learn more of the famous, (Y/n) (Y/L/N).
“I suppose I’m jumping back into old habits after my breakup.” Daniel knew about that, couldn’t run from it even if he tried. But apart of him was happy to have at least some slim of a chance to talk to her, let alone date the woman of his dreams. He’d always admired from afar and thought he’d never have a chance, not until now. In that moment, Daniel takes a risks and hold her hands in his, taking the cigarette out and away from her frail fingertips and puts it out before saying, “Times like these make me think that once you reach the bottom, you can’t go any further down. Sometimes you gotta fall to get back up.” And for the first time in months, (Y/n) feels like she can actually breathe again. It’s like the anvil leaves her chest and she can feel, see hope behind those beautiful bluish, green eyes. From that moment on, they were absolutely smitten.
Of course Shawn wanted (Y/n) to be happy, to not have hurt her the way he had but he couldn’t help but feel hurt upon seeing the photos of the woman he once loved, maybe still loves. There are more videos of them and he can’t not watch them, gritting his teeth while he does so. Daniel runs after (Y/n) before lifting her up into the sky, her giggle echoing across the field before he set her down, both their cheeks red and rosy. Shawn hates the way he kisses her, the way he holds her close to his chest. But he can’t stop watching. There’s another video. She’s on his back, smiling as their friend is about to capture a photo of them. (Y/n) whispers something faint and he can’t quite make out the words until he glances at the caption. “She said ‘I love you’ to him.” Daniel’s jaw drops before he turns over his shoulder to look up at her with loving eyes. Quickly, he drops her before kissing her passionately.
“OH MY GOD THEY ARE SO CUTE I’M DYING!!”
“actual couple goals”
“i want a girl like (Y/n), god damn”
“LOOK AT MY PRECIOUS CINNAMON ROLLS!”
Shawn tosses his phone to the side, rolling his eyes at the nothing but positive tweets. They were once the it couple. How could things have changed so quickly? Except they really hadn’t. It had been nearly a year after he dumped her. But he supposed seeing her single meant they could still reconnect. But at the end of the day, he’d done this to her. Shawn dumped her and she got back from the bottom and found a man who loved her more than life itself.
(I hope you guys liked it! PLEASE. FUCKING. COMMENT)
#fan#fanfic#Fandoms#fandom#fanfiction#holy shit#ship#shy#shawn mendes#shawn mendes x fem!reader#shawn mendes x reader#shawn mendes imagine#Daniel Sharman#daniel sharman imagines#daniel sharman x reader#daniel sharman x femreader#Fic#fighting#fanfics#cuteness#cute#cussing#such angst#ANGSST#angry#angst#mentions of smoking weed
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Puzzle Movie Review
Puzzle is a tiny wonder. It begins with modest ambitions. Agnes is a housewife in Bridgeport, Connecticut who has seen precious little of the world outside her family and church, and has spent her life seeing to the needs of others. Having reached her 40’s without knowing what her own needs are, she is not repressed. Rather, she simply knows no other life; neither do the other women in her circle. We can guess it was simply the way of things that she would grow up and get married and have kids and devote herself to these things, and she did it because it was the way, because generations before her had made it the way, and on and on in a loop.
The film opens on a birthday party. Louis (David Denman) drinks and breaks a plate, which his wife Agnes (Kelly MacDonald) scrambles to clean up even as she also prepares the cake. She puts the candles on it, presents it to the guests, and then blows the candles out. That she is doing most of the work on her birthday is something that seems imprisoning, but also a state of affairs she herself would not likely question. She has cared for men and others since her immigrant father became ill, and not only is it second nature to her, it is also so to every woman she ever knows.
She eventually points this out to Robert (Irrfan Khan), a retired New York millionaire who once invented something and now competes in competitive jigsaw puzzle building. She received such a puzzle for her birthday, and found that 1000 pieces were not nearly enough to daunt her. Now they are puzzle partners, and soon they will be pushing towards more than that, but she is perplexed when he does not want kids: “It’s not weird, just different from me…and everyone else I’ve ever known.” Hers is a world of potlucks, Sunday Mass, and lots of children; you can see the old church steeple from her front porch. Her oldest son Ziggy (Buddy Weiler) had bad grades in school and is stuck. Her youngest son Gabe (Austin Abrams) is an overconfident young man with a vegan Buddhist girlfriend (Liv Hewson); he pens a college acceptance letter disparaging his mother’s lack of worldliness, demanding a life different from hers, that drips with irony. She accidentally finds it. She does not take it to him. She would never do that.
This might seem silly to those of you who grew up in a more modern environment. To me, it is recognizable, a pattern of lives spent in flyover country that I did not question until early adulthood. The scene in Alexander Payne’s Nebraska in which the men watch football while the women cook dinner comes to mind, as I recall it being derided as stereotypical of people in the middle of the country by a coastal critic; I never knew a household growing up where that did not happen. Why, you might ask, doesn’t Agnes simply go do what she wants, when she wants, how she wants? The crucial mistake here it to immediately assume this is not what she wants. As the movie goes on and Agnes discovers new things about herself, she also learns that there is much about her ordinary, dull, beautiful life she would actively choose if she’d made a choice. She would choose her children, and the greatest epiphany in her awakening is that she likes to spend time with them, rather than just raising them. She may have chosen her husband or one like him, who is not a lout or abusive or unfaithful. He is simply rather uninspired, but this is driven by the same wheel ‘o’ tradition that Agnes’s own life is.
I admit I found Louie an interesting person to see on screen, and want to spend a few minutes on David Denman before I return to the universally effusive praise for Kelly MacDonald. He has a thankless role. Many will simply regard him as unmemorable, and some will no doubt declare him an icon of patriarchy. He is neither. He loves a wife who never really got to decide if she loves him, and he does so in the only way many working class, non-metropolitan men are ever taught to do: by being the provider. His concerns are real. He worries about his weight and health, he strives to keep his garage’s financial struggles from burdening his family, he attempts to understand new ideas like Buddhism, and he it hurts him when his wife is unfaithful; he really doesn’t understand why she would do that. His failings are also real, from lamenting a lack of manliness in his oldest son’s desire to be a chef, to his inherent expectation that his wife needs nothing more than wife-dom to be happy, and finally to the rage from his abusive father that is almost never seen but lurks one too many drinks away. The point is he’s an entire, if unfinished, person, and that if he had been the focus of the film there would remain a story to tell.
Kelly MacDonald, however, is one of the underrated treasures of modern actors. She is plain-looking by the ridiculous standards of the Hollywood machine, and will never have so much as a co-starring role in a blockbuster, which is fine. She carries an inward light that could propel many more leading roles in films like this one. Stop for a moment and look at how she, as Agnes, argues with her husband, saying what’s on her mind, realizing it makes sense only to her, and refusing to explain. That is sometimes how real people are; disagreements in life aren’t written for the screen. Watching MacDonald’s face as Agnes builds a puzzle with frightening speed is more visually arresting than you might expect, even though I quite frankly think I’d find a jigsaw competition more spectator-worthy than people eating hot dogs. There is a key scene with Ziggy. He runs into her unexpectedly during a bad day, says an honest thing, and to his surprise gets an honest answer. This may be the exact moment when Agnes decides to be something like herself, and note that it comes not in an intimate moment with the attractive affair partner, or even with her husband, but with her son. How many parental relationships would be vastly improved if the parent just said “To hell with my image”?
I dearly love a film like this. It has been directed by Marc Turtletaub, who worked from a script by Oren Moverman and Polly Mann, who in turn adapted an Argentine film by Natalia Smirnoff which doesn’t seem to be available here. In moving the setting to just-outside-of-somewhere, U.S.A., the writers have shown what I consider to be deep knowledge of the way things work outside of coastally-produced sitcom worlds. Chris Norr’s camera encompasses familiar details of the sorts of scenes I am used to from “nothing towns”, and frames them in ways that give the mundane an odd beauty. All of this seems to fit Agnes. MacDonald’s likely-unheralded-at-Awards-time performance draw us into a woman whose thoughts are maybe deeper than she knows, and certainly deeper than we do.
Verdict: Highly Recommended
Note: I don’t use stars, but here are my possible verdicts. I suppose you could consider each one as adding a star.
Must-See
Highly Recommended
Recommended
Average
Not Recommended
Avoid like the Plague
You can follow Ryan's reviews on Facebook here:
https://www.facebook.com/ryanmeftmovies/
Or his tweets here:
https://twitter.com/RyanmEft
All images are property of the people what own the movie.
#kelly macdonald#david denman#irrfan khan#liv hewson#austin abrams#buddy weiler#puzzle#movie#women#connecticut#bridgeport#birthday#catholicism#buddhism#Religion#new york#marc turtletaub#oren moverman#polly mann#natalia smirnoff#chris norr#argentina
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Updated Updated Masterlist
I should just link this in my bio or something and then update as needed. But that would be smart or something. Anyway.
Tom Holland
Sick Day- The reader is sick; Tom takes care of her. Fluff.
Officially Untitled, Unofficially titled I Almost Posted This On My Main Blog - Reader has a terrible day at work; Tom cheers her up. Fluff.
Tom Holland Hair Watch 2017 - When Tom makes a concerning tweet about his hair, the reader visits him on set to see what's up. FLUFF.
Waiting - The reader is waiting on her doctor's office to call with some test results. Fluff again.
Chilly Nights - Reader and Tom are hanging out on the couch; the reader is cold.
Tonight, I'll Need You to Stay (Part 1) - Tom helps the reader escape an abusive relationship. Domestic abuse, swearing, angst.
Tonight, I'll Need You to Stay (part 2) - Tom helps the reader move on from her abusive relationship. Smut
Love Will Come to You - The reader is Tom's new co-star; she keeps falling in love with the wrong guys and Tom can't stand to watch it.
If I Take My Heart's Advice - The reader is torn between her current boyfriend Aiden and her ex, Tom.
I give you peace when peace is fragile - Tom catches the reader self-harming herself. Warnings: self-harm, blood, angst.
Drunken Confession Night - Movie Night with Harrison and the three eldest Hollands always devolves into Drunken Confession Night. This time, though, Tom drops a bomb.
Things That Go Bump - Tom and the reader are in bed talking about ghosts; they hear strange noises and go investigate.
Tom After Dentist - Tom gets his wisdom tooth pulled and has some interesting things to say, especially to his girlfriend of a couple of months.
Third Time's a Charm - After Tom (allegedly) breaks his nose a third time, the reader makes another trailer visit.
You Should Be Here - The reader passes away; Tom tries to figure out how to go on. Angst.
Tom Dating an Older Woman - A headcanon about Tom dating an older woman.
Love in the Apocalypse - The reader is on meds for a cough that make her have crazy dreams...about Tom and the zombie apocalypse.
Can't Not Be With You - The reader tries to seduce Tom while drunk; he refuses to take advantage of her.
Holland Family Ski Trip - Tom teaches the reader how to ski while the family visits Sam in France.
Small bump - Tom wants kids. You don't. Now what?
Sod Off, Valentine's Day - You have a cold. And your period. On Valentine's Day.
Golden Dreams - AU in which you and your ice dancing partner Tom go to the Olympics. You'd never considered falling in love with him...or have you?
battered fighters - You and Tom have a nasty argument. He tries to make it up to you
‘close your eyes before the sleep’ - Tom’s girlfriend is working on her thesis for her masters’ degree; Tom wants nothing more than to give her a break.
This blurb I wrote that doesn’t have an official title - Tom wants to celebrate your anniversary by playing a song for you - but the only instrument he has handy? A kazoo.
Share a Coke - Soulmate!Au. When you turn 18, you get the chance to meet your soulmate. You’ll know when the day a Coke can with their name on it shows up in your fridge. Tom wonders if he’ll ever find his... until a can with your name on it appears.
Harrison Osterfield
Harrison Potter - Harrison comes home from Milan with a baseball cap and a secret.
"I could stay here all day" - Blurb based on a tweet from Harrison about wanting to stay in bed all day.
"Can it stop snowing plz" - Blurb about staying at Harrison's during a snowstorm
take a chance - Movie night with roommate Haz turns into something both of you have dreamed about. Smut.
Don't Move - Harrison wants the reader to be more assertive during sex. SMUT.
“y tho” - Harrison is sick with a terrible cold; fortunately, you’re a really good nurse.
‘loving can hurt sometimes’ - The reader and Harrison fight over comments made about her on his Instagram.
Golfing with Harrison - a blurb about Harrison teaching you how to golf, and Third Wheel Tom insisting on keeping score.
The First Time - the reader loses her virginity to Harrison. Smut.
Marry Me - Harrison is invited to his best friend’s wedding; she has no idea he’s in love with her. Based on the song “Marry Me” by Thomas Rhett; written for a writing challenge @upsidedownparker hosted.
Be Alright - Based on the song “Be Alright” by Dean Lewis. Tom and (eventually) the reader help Harrison put the pieces of his broken heart back together.
Your Guide to the Afterlife - The reader dies. Harrison is her guide to the next step in her eternal journey.
The Hand Fic - Harrison knows how to use his hands. SMUT
Roommate AU
Roomies - AU in which the reader goes on a bad date, watches Cheers, and realizes she may be falling for her roommate Tom.
'I need a favor' - Tom asks the reader, his roommate, for a (pretty big) favor.
The Cure for a Broken Heart - After getting dumped, your roommates Tom and Harrison help console you. But who knew that the cure for a broken heart was already under your own roof?
Headcanons/General AU
Road Trips with Tom - A headcanon about what a road trip with Tom would be like.
Tom Dating a Famous Writer - Headcanon about Tom dating a famous writer.
Tom Caring for Your Baby Daughter - Headcanon about Tom taking care of your baby daughter.
Headcanon about an ER trip - A headcanon inspired by my recent trip to the ER.
Headcanon about Nurse Tom - in which the patient, under sedation, tells him to "fight me"
Four Days - Four days in the life of a keyholder at a small-town store, who flirts with a cute fireman named Tom.
- 'I think i wanna marry you' - Five boys (Tom, Harrison, Harry, Sam, and Jacob) and the moment they knew they wanted to marry you.
'Baby, just say yes' - Five boys, five proposals. A companion piece to 'I think i wanna marry you'.
‘marry me, today and every day’ - Five boys, five weddings.
Royal!AU
Royal Minder - a headcanon about the reader being the royal minder for bratty Prince Tom.
The Princess of Starbucks (Royal!Reader/Barista!Tom) - Bored with palace life, the reader - princess of a small country - sneaks into town for a day of anonymity. While at the coffee shop, she meets the most beautiful boy she's ever seen working the counter.
Peter Parker
Personal Space - You're trying to study, but keep getting distracted by one Peter Parker.
Stop Staring at Me! - The reader has a crush on Peter. Ned knows something she doesn't.
Prom Night - The reader is up for prom queen. She's dating Flash Thompson but has a crush on Peter Parker; both boys are running for Prom King.
Dive - The reader asks Peter to pose as her boyfriend to make Flash, her ex, jealous.
First Kiss with Peter - a headcanon about your first kiss with Peter.
You need a blue sky holiday - You had a bad day. Peter vows to turn it around.
First Time Peter Says He Loves You - a headcanon about the first time Peter says those three little words.
Jacket - “Take my jacket, it’s cold.” Written for a writing challenge.
Someone Else’s Star - All the reader wants is to be in love. But is she wishing on someone else’s star? Inspired by Bryan White’s song “Someone Else’s Star.”
This blurb I wrote about a rainy day - It’s a blurb about a rainy day.
Candygram - The reader hates Valentine’s Day. But will Peter give her a reason not to?
Annabelle’s Homework - Peter is so in love with Annabelle Stephens, he thinks nothing of doing her homework for her. The reader is upset by this. Mostly because Annabelle isn’t in love with Peter… she is. Inspired by Alec Benjamin’s song “Annabelle’s Homework.”
Boyband!AU
The Boys in the Band - The four Holland brothers and Harrison are in a boy band. All of them (minus Paddy) are fighting for the reader's affections.
Too Much to Ask - Sam Holland meets the girl of his dreams, has his heart broken, and deals with the aftermath. Inspired by Niall Horan's "Too Much to Ask."
Miscellaneous
Trois - Tom, Haz, threesome. That’s all you really need to know.
Hazza - The infamous Harry/Harrison threesome fic. Smut.
Harry Holland
Harry's New Glasses - Harry is self-conscious about his new glasses; his girlfriend, the reader, thinks they're hot.
3:30something - It's 3:30 am and the reader can't sleep; Harry does his best to help.
Here For You - Harry is there after the reader’s grandfather dies.
Finals Week - Harry helps the reader de-stress while preparing for finals.
The Bench - you seek solace in the bench at your favorite pond when you and Harry have your worst fight yet.
Sam Holland (note: I do not write for Sam anymore)
Steady Rain - Sam comforts the reader during a thunderstorm.
Jacob Batalon
I Hate Christmas Parties - Jacob plans to tell Laura he's in love with her at Zendaya's Christmas party. When she arrives with another man, he's devastated - until he finds someone who's as miserable as he is.
Love is Christmas - Jacob and the reader, who met at Zendaya's Christmas party, have a cookie-baking and holiday movie date. (This one got approximately zero notes but I liked it so read it, ok?
A still-untitled prompt request - Jacob and the reader make love in front of the fireplace on Christmas Eve. NSFW.
Baseball!AU
No-Hitter - Pitcher Sam Holland goes for his first career no-hitter.
Heart and Hustle - Tom, standout high school third baseman, plays in the championship game.
After Practice - After a tough practice, minor league first baseman Harrison needs a release. Smut.
Ned Leeds
Actual Mom Friend Ned Leeds - A headcanon about everyone's favorite Guy in the Chair.
Salamander - Ned befriends the new girl in school. But she has a secret.
Single Dad!AU
The Recital - Single Dad and CEO Tom Holland tries desperately to make it to his five-year-old daughter Lily’s first dance recital on time.
Guilt Trips and Sundaes - Tom feels bad about yelling at Lily, so he takes her out for ice cream. They run into a friend of Lily’s from school... and her single mom.
Sweet Pea - Single dad Harry Holland gets upset at his daughter Eleanor.
Past Curfew - Architect Harrison Osterfield is worried when his teenage son Evan misses curfew.
Double Trouble - Music professor Sam Holland, under lots of stress, snaps at his twin daughters Rose and Iris.
Spiderling - Peter Parker gets upset at his daughter Julia.
Stray Kids
Just a Tiny Fire - Pairing: Han Jisung/Reader
The reader has been stressed out at work, so their best friend Jisung tries to help...but causes a minor calamity instead.
Untitled Han Jisung Fic - Han Jisung/Female Reader
Jisung and the reader celebrate their one-year anniversary. Smut, fluff, the other 7 are total doofuses (and Changbin may or may not be channeling a frat boy, I haven’t decided yet).
This Seat Taken? - Seo Changbin/Female Reader
The reader finds herself falling in love with her best friend, Changbin.
Series
The Tea Shop Girl - Pairing: Harrison Osterfield/Reader
Harrison Osterfield falls for the girl that runs the tea shop down the street.
In Charge - Pairing: Accountant!Tom Holland/CEO!Female Reader
The reader, CEO of her own company, has an “arrangement” with Tom, one of her new accountants.
Spy vs. Spy - Pairing: Spy!Harrison Osterfield/Spy!Female Reader
Harrison Osterfield, one of Britain’s top spies, keeps getting thrown into missions with rival spy (y/n). Can they work together without killing each other? Or will something more develop?
Win-Win - Pairing: Female Reader/Tom Holland
Temporarily homeless, the reader needs a place to stay. Her friend Tom, who has a reputation for being a womanizer, has an extra room… and an idea.
Blood in the Water - Pairing: Female Reader/Mob!Harrison Osterfield
Harrison Osterfield is the most feared man in Kingston and leader of one of Britain’s most notorious mobs. How far will he go to protect the ones he loves?
As always, I accept requests! I mostly write Tom Holland, as you can tell. But I will write Harrison or any of the Hollands (not Paddy - I’ll include him in a fic but I won’t write one about him). I’ll write Peter Parker too.
#tom holland#tom holland fanfiction#harrison osterfield#harrison osterfield fanfiction#tom holland imagine#tom holland fluff#tom holland smut#peter parker#peter parker fanfiction#peter parker x reader#peter parker imagine#harrison osterfield x reader#tom holland x reader#so how many tags is too many?#oh look there's more#stray kids#stray kids fanfiction
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