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wench-and-jezebel · 2 years

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Sherlock Holmes (2009) Reaction:

Jezebel (@typicalopposite) reacts [with occasional asides by Wench (@scripted-downfall)]

[This reaction is sponsored by the Actual Snack Food I'm eating: I has a soda. Be proud!] Same! Mtn dew! It’s been a while since I had one… I’ve already drank three ☠️

Oh suspenseful music

RDJ! He loooks so different without facial hair [He does indeed]

Oooooof. Ouch [That was a very... awkwardly placed shimmy down to the knee tho… Buddy, why you getting that close?]

So like Sherlock’s thing. Is he’s really smart? Orrrr [Ma'am- Do you not know Sherlock Holmes?] I know he’s a detective? [Okay, hold up. Pause… This is kinda a crucial bit of information ☠️] Ok [His thing is being observant. And yes, being well versed in a lot of subjects, but-] Soooo like shawn [Yes, like Shawn. Pretty much exactly like Shawn, but a little more drug addicted and differently fixated (e.g. not pop culture, and more science in general)]

Is that John? [Yes] Well. I’m already seeing some Things. “I like the hat” “Thanks just picked it up” [Also… "I thought I left the stove on" "You did" DOMESTIC BLISS AT ITS FINEST]

Oh shit Watson got moves too [Ma'am, Watson was in the military aksldjf] Idk why I thought he just stood to the side like an npc [Nah, he was an army doctor]

☠️☠️☠️☠️ [Oop-] “Your colleague… won’t be moving with you” [*simultaneously* "Your colleague? Won't be moving with you, will he?" Hmmmmm, why you asking, bud?] ☠️☠️☠️ SBC

Aw man Watsons leaving. Well, “Leaving” [No wonder Holmes is moody] Does he tho? [I say nothing]

He’s like I must make myself look mentally unstable…. Oh I always do… damn

[Men will get on their knees in front of their best bro buds] Detective bros? Crime solving bros? Mystery bros? Hmmm… [Baker Street Bros] YESSSSS OMG

[Poor pup :(]

Eww, not the woman [Holmes not wanting to meet his best bro bud's girlfriend/fiancee]

“You wear a jacket” Why did you think I wouldn’t like this? ☠️☠️ [I said I couldn't remember it well aslkdfjalskdfj It's been years since I saw it. I said I wasn't going to stake my rep on it]

The smile. THE SMILEEEE! I LOVE RDJ

YESSSS

Oooof… Oh, let me fangirl over my love- your fiancé

Oh, ma’am… You shouldn’t ask questions you don’t want the answer to

I THOUGHT HE SAID “YOU’RE STUPID” [alskdjf nope] BUT HES MAKING HER FEEL IT ANYWAY [I mean, she did ask] OOOOOOOOOOF

WELL DAMN, HE AIN'T EVEN PHASED [That's another thing about Holmes... He does tend to be a bit arrogant.]

What is happening?!? [Holmes boxes] Victorian-era boxing

Oooooof, sweeet lord. This is hurting me

They are like… well damn

[Did I mention the drug-addicted bit? He used morphine and cocaine in the books.]

Then you’d be a bastad.

Oh look: Bastad.

That looks unsafe

[Watson sulking] Well, damn. [Boyfriends bickering] ☠️☠️☠️ Like every single line, I’m like. Yep. I be seeing the it. [Yeahhhh me too. Like I said, it was years ago that I watched this last, but now. Now I see it.] If I didn’t know there was hella fanfics I would already be checking, but I’ve seeeeeen it. [I think most are about Sherlock tho. Not Sherlock Holmes (2009)] A lot I’ve read are for this one [Oh. Well okay then. I yield to your expertise. I haven't looked ☠️] I seek them

[Bruh, even this interaction verges on. Things.]

Oh shit. The way he slid into those bars

Buddy he has no sane thoughts in his head [Which buddy?] The bad guy

Ack. Sweet lord

["Death is only the beginning" They plagiarized The Mummy aslkdjfa;lskdfj] Oh damn

Or is it 👀👀

Rachael McAdams!!! I love her!

[This is a slightly less malicious BBC Musketeers Athos/Milady, btw]

Oh, burn: “And you’re between husbands”

[Actually, ma'am... I wouldn't put it passed you to poison an envelope, ngl. Milady-coded.]

Ohhh Watson being pouty and jealous now [What else is a guy's bud bro bestie to do?]

The screech [Matt Meese-sounding mf] Oh ☠️😂😂😂

I’m ded. He fell into the building

[WATSON] “It’s nothing to do with me” [LITERALLY DOING THE NAIL THING]

[“‘You’ means ‘us’” "’You’ means ‘you’" Watson, don't pretend]

Ackkk Marryyyy 😤😤 the name just keeps a bitchy reputation (I say in defense of Sherlock being bitchy)

That’s me [Lestrade?] Yup. Can’t pronounce the big word AND too scared to do my job

Sweet lord… Blech

[Bruh. Y'all are saying the same thing at the same time. That's kinda Subtext.] 😂😂😂😂

[Supernatural, you say?] 👀👀👀 Carry on my wayward soooooon

["Scratches around the keyhole" *PTSD flashback from BBC Sherlock starts*]

Oooop- “Brothersss” She means Bros

["Give her my best" *Hates himself for saying it* That's some right-fine pining, my dude] ☠️☠️☠️☠️ [AND HIS SMILE WHEN JOHN CAME BACK???] But. But marryyy 😩😂😂😂 I love it

Oh mah gawd. The poor frog

[I love their outfitssss. Btw, this is how I dress. Well, half the time. The other half of the time, it's cargo pants and flannel as;ldkfj] ‘Cause you were born in the wrong time [This... Is true]

Moood

Thasss a big man

The screeeeeech

[Ring go bye-bye. That feels symbolic] ☠️☠️ [He does marry her before the next film, though, iirc] Ahhh I see

“Brother” [Sir didn't even remember the important ring he just bought in favor of running after his best bro bud]

Welp, he’s asleep.

Bitch better wake up

[Um. Bud. Buds. That was– Ya know what. Okay.] aka if you go we both go

Oh, Watson ["Having been talked into going with you" Bro, you went back without a single bit of coercion] Don’t do the “I just risked my life for you then bitch you out for it” thing

[Y'ALL. Y'ALLLLL] “Steal your clothes,” huh? [OUR DOG?!?!?] Yep. I can hear the fic ideas pinging off. Like those troll hug bracelets…If you haven’t seen the movie you won’t get that [alksdjf nope, I haven’t]

Like, how she was smiling? Like… Bruh. Ew

[Also, Watson acting like he's a paragon of relationships without Holmes’ interference when he just lost the ring he'd only just bought] Right?!

Not me sitting here hoping this has the sappy ass (Sherlock) “fine, you want me to go away, I will”… (Watson) *miserable, comes crawling back* [I KNOW. SAME. AND I CAN'T REMEMBER IF IT DOES OR NOT.] If it doesn’t the fandom will ☠️ If the fandom doesn’t gimme 30 mins and it will 😭😂☠️ [I, personally, am a fan of this conversation being followed by serious personal harm to person 1. Angsty though it is... Well, I guess that's on-brand] I was gonna say that but my thumbs were cramping uppppp [as;lkdjf] Look at us being sadistic. But with a happy end. [As I said... on-brand]

Le gasp! His son!

SOMEONE LET HIM PICK A LOCK! SHEESH!

["I hit a dead end... and my bud bro bestie is fighting with me :("] Now I sad

“Oh, dear” ☠️☠️

[Once again: the lighter, (only slightly) less toxic, less murder-couple-y Athos/Milady. And the "less," btw, is by a smidgeon, not a bunch]

He ded

Damn… Jealous. That’s a nice tub. [You're about to not be jealous] Ooooop ghost son’s a coming

[As I said, much less jealous… He just drowned/boiled to death in it.] Blech. BLECHHHH

So is this supernatural like… for real? [Whyyyy do you think I'd tell you this?]

Poor maid

Is he like wigged out by dead people? Sherlock, I mean? [What do you mean by wigged out? I thought I knew what you meant but don't see the context] ‘Cause at the first one it was like he couldn’t look at the body. Then it seemed like he was weird when he walked in this room. But he stopped this time. [No, he's just observing. And also hiding shit from the cops.] Fair

I’m still feeling some type of way about her getting John out and not Sherlock too… and John just left. The dishonor! [I KNOW]

["Thanks for that, by the way" John, give a bit more than that] Dishonorrrr. Hmph, and it’s a movie so any divorce arc we get is gonna be short-lived. [That's the plot of this film: Baker Street Bros solve a case While Divorcing] ☠️☠️☠️☠️ [Go to Google: that's the blurb that comes up] I bet you if I typed that into google there’s a fic [With a worse ship name]

["Not us." "Right, of course." Ummmmm Byler Rain Scene-coded??? "What did you think? That we were never gonna get fiancees? That we were just gonna sit in our flat all day and solve crimes for the rest of our lives?" "Yeah. I guess I did."] ☹️☹️☹️☹️☹️☹️☹️

😂😂😂 [Bad guy did the swoop again]

Nooo. Noooooo. I’m ded. He fucking shot in circles and used all his bullets

Oh shit

OH SHIT [GAH DAMMIT LET HIM PICK A LOCK] OH SHIT OH SHIT [He still hasn't been able to :(] This is like a fuckign saw movie

["Don't get excited… because I'm taking off your belt"]

Sweeet lord

[I love her outfittttt. Once again: that's how I dress alksdjflsakj]

He got to pick one [He did!]

[Also, why does he look so uncomfortable when she hugged him alksdjf] I KNOW

Oh shit

[Oh yeah. Watch this. I do remember this one, actually. I remarked on this one even back when I first watched] Ooooooof

OOOOOF

I LOVE THIS COP [Also, he couldn't get Holmes to focus unless he confirmed Watson was alive elkasdjf;lkdsajf]

I KNOWWWW 😭😭😭

Ack bitchy lady lol

Run, Sherlock! She’s onto you! [She's actually being frustratingly not bad, ngl] Hmmmph. She just has a bitchy face, though. Like, she squints menacingly when she talks.

[But also. Buddy obsessing over the case because Now It's Personal] I KNOWWW 😭😭☹️

[Bruh, it's Howl's Moving Castle. House boutta move] Now he has to eat a star

Sir. [...] Well, then. [Cas: “You look terrible.” Dean: ��You know, it wouldn’t kill you to lie every now and again” vs. Watson: “You look gorgeous” Sherlock: “Somehow, I knew you wouldn’t leave.” It’s the same scene.] 😭😭😭😭

A snek

I keep wondering why he keeps talking like this. (Like oh he’s being funny) but no. No that’s just how they talk ☠️☠️☠️☠️ [Yup]

‘Ello, ‘ello, ‘ello [I've heard that somewhere before] I think the new angel in GOmens watched Sherlock Holmes [THAT'S WHERE]

Oh shit

[HOLMES GOT TO PICK ANOTHER LOCK] You go buddy!

😂😂😂😂 He said soldier boy

[He. he did not get to pick the lock apparently] Oh noooo [He had the key] For shame

Shoot him. Now please

[I love her vestttttt]

Oop- Lorge guy is back

[Teamwork makes the dreamwork] 😂😂😂

This man and just easily breaking bonesss

“Course I can.” Buddy. He is quite big. You sure

We know, John, we know.

Noooooo. Nope. That’s where I forfeit the deal I had with scary mystery man. Fuck that.

Ooooooof [A fitting irony, that] Right?!

[This is a cliffhanger for the second film, btw. Which we should watch... tomorrow] YESSS

AWWW he’s leaving [:(] Poor Sherlock

[BRUH HE GAVE- HE GAVE IRENE'S PENDANT TO HIS BEST BRO BUD FOR AN ENGAGEMENT RING?] Le gasp

Wot. WOT. ["MY TONGUE IS GOING; I'LL BE NO USE TO YOU AT ALL" CONTEXT? WHAT CONTEXT?] ☠️☠️☠️

["Our dog"]

Oooop. We’re there. Being able to control anything with the touch of a button? It’s the future.

– – –

Jezebel: AHHHH! New ship unlocked! Well, it was already unlocked, but now it’s fully activated

Wench: Congratulations, my dear :)

Jezebel: Ok so movie end point... as was expected I love it and I definitely want to watch the second tomorrow 😁😁😁😁 I loveeeee RDJ so I figured I would too! 😂😂 but like my husband said when I asked, there’s not many movies I don’t like. I’m very easily pleased lol.

Wench: We’ll have to do it tomorrow, then, after my work’s done :)

Jezebel: Hmpppphhh Maryyyy 😤😤 and I don’t even really have a reason to not like her minus her name is just attached to bitchy women… ok, that’s a lie, she’s bitchy too! 😂😂😂😂 Not, like, god awful. But.. it’s the eyes

Wench: Ma'am! Problem child.

Jezebel: But aside from all this. The main reason we are here… Sherlock and Watson… are… Welp they are in love obviously. Like. Duh. You do not act like that with just a friend. I see what the hype is about and if the blatant chemistry- er- “subtext” is there in the show too. Then yeahhhhh it just is not deniable

Wench: I. May have just tuned out, my deepest apologies. I got distracted. By The Musketeers. I’m making you watch it. BUT. Anyway… fair! And other movie thoughts? (I don't really have much to add... I've seen it before enough that it's just kinda. There. Also, is hella late and my brain be unhelpful rn.)

Jezebel: I 👀 I can’t think of any.

Wench: Ma'am, you condensed the entire plot to the ship and bitchiness

Jezebel: Welp…. Help! Ask me about something cause my mind is panic erasing as we speak

Wench: … The bad guy? The plot? The acting? literally anything??????

Jezebel: Okayyyy! So The bad guy looks just fucking like Stanley Tucci! But it’s not and as soon as I saw who he was I remembered in another movie he is in I thought he was Stanley Tucci again lol. But this guy actually has been in a lot more big movies!

Wench: alskdfj

Jezebel: The acting? Ma’am! How dare you! The acting was :Chef_Kiss: spectacular. Period. 😂

Wench: Hmph. You said to ask stuff. It's not like you'd answered that before.

Jezebel: The plot. To be honest I kept getting lost in them flirting and then trying to get my thumbs to type fast enough I was confused for a bit about what was even happening in the plot. Past there’s a bad guy who was executed but didn’t die, or maybe he did but then came back they don’t know. And he is killing people ☠️☠️ but I got it all now! 😂😂

Wench: …

Jezebel: Shush! I gotta say tho… I love movies set in the past that have like some hyper advanced technology. That’s so simple to us now!

Wench: Yeah, that’s fair :)

Jezebel: And… Okay, now idk what else to say 😭😭

Wench: Nor I; perks of me running on very little sleep… This has been the most boring Wench half of the reaction in the history of Wench and Jezebel, but it's fineeeee.

Jezebel: 😂😂😂😂

Wench: It'll pick up for tomorrow... Sequel then?

Jezebel: YES!

Wench: Aight… til then :)

#sherlock holmes 2009 #sherlock holmes #john watson #johnlock #or as we like to call them:#baker street bros #irene adler #mary watson #we're posting this at 2 am btw #just for a glimpse into our mental states #warning for those who don't know this blog...#jezebel is very shipper. her dislike of mary stems from this. forgive her her sins #reactions #movie reactions #jezebel (pr)

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baekhvuns · 11 months

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Ok good news my mum said it fine to take a drop year like finally dude 😭😭 but the bad news is the job i told you about....i couldn't get it...cuz the aunt tht told me out didn't tell us how urgent it was like they needed an answer then and there if it was a yes or no, but of course emy parents took a lot of time to decide and when they called her she was like "oh now the slot is unavailable" 😭

Anyways whenever I'll get a job I will, but ykw I'm worried about now, a function is taking place in my house and well...I'm happy cuz I get to dress up BUT IK MY RELATIVES ARE GOING TO EAT ME UP WITH QUESTIONS AND IF I TELL THEM IM TAKING A YEAR OFF IMMA HV TO DEAL WITH THOSE JUDGY LOOKS 😭😭 I get what mum meant...but, I'll Def won't pay mind to it, but at this point, I'm preparing for that stupid test and honestly...I'm see no opportunities for like graphic designing and stuff as of now...or any other course I'd like to opt for but...I won't give up, I'll look for them and in the meantime I'm focusing on my language learning...yeah, but for some reason I've been really happy...idk but yeah 😭

AND WE'RE GOING TO THE WEDDING ON 14 JANUARY YAYYYY!!! CELEBRATIONS!! And before tht too I'm wearing suit to the function I told you about and it's not a new one it's my grandmothers...I'm HAPPY 😭

Ok so i HAD to talk abt this to you, so I've been tutoring my cousin, she's in 9th grade and yeah we've been having fun, but sometimes she...SHE HAS A SUPERIORITY COMPLEX OK? And well ok it shouldn't bother me but the way she says it ticks me off like the other day we were talking about this whole ethnic and traditional clothes thing and she legit said "well, you know traditional clothing doesn't suit you, you can't manage it" or something like "when you speak Punjabi you look really funny, even my mum said you don't know how to speak it"

...like? HOW CN YOU POSSIBLY TELL ME THAT MY CULTURE DOESN'T SUIT ME??? WTH??

Anyways, NAURRR you're so right PPL my age debuting is like 😭 LIKE WHAT THE HELL AM I DOING IN MY LIFE? WHY ARE WE STILL HERE? JUST TO SUFFER?

Omg yes, that actress is like a softer version of hema Malini THE EYELINER I WAS DED 😭 u r so right, the Indian fan base is so FRUSTRATING bcz they collectively make up a Karen fanbase really I'm not even kidding, like an actress gains weight they all go crazy, or they say oh she's had plastic surgery and stuff...It's so annoying honestly man

As a person who has no experience with lehnga I think I get what you're tryna say, the poofy lehengas the ones you gotta pick up and then move. Omg i just remembered something, the other day me and my mum were just talking about something and somehow we somehow started talking about relationships and my mum, my typical brown mum, was like "you better not have a bf, focus on your studies, when the time is right, you'll find someone, and blah blah" and i looked at her straight and the yes and I said "do you honestly believe i have the confidence TO FIND MYSELF A BF?" And she started laughing like 😭😭 I was like what? And she said you're right 😭😭😭

hello!!

OKAY WE GOT ONE GOOD NEWS??? and 🧍🏻‍♀️

COME ON 😭😭😭 U GUYS SHOULDVE SAID YES ON SPOT DEAL W THE CONSEQUENCES LATER AT LEAST THE $$$ 😭😭 hopefully another one opens for u 🤲🏻

see for graphic designing, u can always start a etsy business where u sell prints (made in canva) and or templates, some of my friends do that as well as i so it does generate and make u practice ur skills! ofc focus on ur test, hope u pass w good grades 💓💓

WE WIN EITHER WAY???? we need pics (will priv the ask if u do send!) and details and everything

“how can u tell me my culture doesn’t suit me??” LMFAOOO PLS THIS EXACTLY FVWJDHWKHDKW like what’s the competition in speaking punjabi like 😭😭😭😭 see my mom raised me like “if they don’t like what u wear and point at it they’re just jealous they don’t do it better” SO U GET MY POINT JCJCJ

NO SRS???? LIKE WERE WAS I IN THAT GENE POOL WHERE U ALL GOT SELECTED AND THEN BECAME FAMOUS LIKE

her eyeliner and looks were god tier, truly what an era of women and beauty 😩 omfg im so tired of the “she’s pregnant” bc she’s wearing LOSE CLOTHES OR HWS HER HAND ON HER STOMACH LIKE????? aunties ????? shaming aish for weight gain and then u click their pfp it’s “shalini nath, jai ma durga💖” ????? FAM????

i wore it once never again, the poof in it like gets stuck in between ur legs so there’s like poof stuck in ur thighs and u have to walk like a penguin truly the most frustrating night of my life and it was at a reception too 😭

LMFAOOOO NO CAUSE HRJWHDKW SAME LIKE THEY RLY THINK SAYING THAT WILL DO SOMETHING TO WHEN IT NEVER DOES like im amazed u have this thought that i have a lot of bf’s but miss girl that iz le not true <3

#✉️ : ask #[ rosesapphiremysticalrose ]

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eddsworld-enchanted-era · 11 months

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~Somewhere to stay.~

(base by the ever-incredible EddsWorld-Base on Deviantart, can be found here!)

(tw for alcoholism mention, and general angst.)

"So, yeah..." Tom says awkwardly, scratching at the back of his neck, "I was uh... wondering if we could stay here for a few nights."

"Well, I don't see why you couldn't," Sharpay begins with a smile, "We have a spare room, and-"

"He absolutely canNOT." Tim interrupts, glaring at the only other eyeless man in all of Europe, "Not after everything."

"C-Come on, Tim... I thought we put all that behind us!" Tom stutters as he attempts to reason with his brother, "It's... it's been years, th-this is really important, a-and I, well... I..."

"...I missed you..." he murmurs, barely audible as he glances away.

"Oh, you missed me?" Tim sneers, "Of all the people in the world, my lowlife drunk of a brother, who threw his entire career away in one night, who never wanted to see me again, that's the guy who misses me? Give me a damn break."

"I... you... it..." Tom fumbles for words, silent for a moment before he finds his voice, "It wasn't that I never wanted to - it's that you left me in the fucking dirt when I needed your help the fucking most, Timothy." he growls out the name of his more successful twin, "We were supposed to make it together. You weren't supposed to just walk away because I picked up a little drinking habit that you couldn't handle because it ruined our perfect, squeakly-fucking-clean image!" Tom raises his voice as he speaks, shouting the final few words.

"It wasn't a little habit - you damned near took me down with you!" Tim gestures with air quotes around 'little habit', voice taking on a mocking tone for a moment, "What was I supposed to do? Sacrifice myself for some loser who couldn't make it half a show without passing out? There was a reason I split off to do my own solo act!"

"It would have only been a little habit had you the mind to stop me!"

"Well maybe I didn't want to stop you!"

"What, would you be better off if I drank myself to death?!"

"Maybe I would be, you worthless alcoholic bastard!"

"Fine! Then maybe I will! This stupid world doesn't need saving anyway!" Tom shouts as he begins to storm away.

He is stopped as someone grabs his hoodie.

"Wh-" he can't finish the sentence as he's yanked into the house.

"You can stay." Sharpay says with a warm, friendly smile, pulling Tom close to himself, letting go of his hood to gently drape an arm over the man's shoulders, before he turns to Tim, only saying one word to the guitarist.

"Out."

"You can't tell me to leave, I live here!"

"And I'm the one paying the rent." Sharpay sighs, "So you can simply get over yourself and act like an adult, or you can leave."

"Psh, whatever." Tim scoffs, walking away, "Not like I want to be here anyhow."

Edd just kind of stands there, having been naught but a helpless spectator, before finally speaking up with a cough "...Should I... uh..." he pauses, at a loss for words, "You know..."

"No, no, it's okay! You can stay here too!" Sharpay gestures for Edd to come closer, smiling as though nothing had occurred, "I know you've been so eager to see Ded again, after all!"

"No offence, but how did you know? Did he tell you or something?"

"No, I've been spying on you." Sharpay deadpans, before snickering a little, "Of course he told me! He hasn't piped down about it since you called!"

"I mean... I can't blame him. It has been five years, after all." Edd shrugs a bit, stepping inside and shutting the front door behind him, "You got any coke in here?" he asks as he looks around.

"Nah, but we do have that... Mr. Salt? Or whatever it's called." Sharpay states idly, "But I could go out and-"

"It's alright, I can deal with Dr. Pepper." Edd smiles, while it hadn't been his favourite soda, he'd take most anything as substitute - just as long as it wasn't Pepsi.

He walks off to the kitchen, leaving Pay and Tom alone.

"And as for you..." he begins, a sly smile slowly spreading across his face "I'm not done with you just yet."

"Wh... what does that mean?" Tom asks cautiously.

"Whatever you want it to mean, dear." Pay grins, "I am the host, after all - and it's my job to make a guest feel welcome in my holes- my home."

#eddsworld #eddsworld enchanted era #eddsworld fan era #eddsworld au #EddsWorld-Base #eddsworld base #base edit #eddsworld tom #eddsworld edd #eddsworld tim #eddsworld pay #eddsworld sharpay #eddsworld fanart #eddsworld fanfiction #minific #mod robohoe #ENOUGH TIMPAY IT'S TIME FOR TOMPAY #jkjk... unless...? 😳#also i KNOW in the last one with the typos i said they all made up #but i can't help myself... i am the sad man and i bring the angst....#and also i mean... he's not totally kicking out tim he's just making him leave for the next few days #because he knows tim and tom will likely never be able to make up after everything that had happened over the years between them #and he does not want that drama lmao #also do ya like the new tim design - it's really subtle but... i changed his dye job a little lol #also also this is technically part of the episode - it'll likely be somewhat changed in the Snow Turning Back Now script #but nonetheless it will be there in some form... and yes it's basically ripping off that one scene in The End but hush #this is my fan era and i get to jank scenes/'make canon callbacks'#eddsworld Snow Turning Back Now #eddsworld fan episode

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clansocreations · 3 years

Text

@leliesblou @scruggzi

Alrighty here goes nothing!

~~~

I love how the guys like I know that leg. That can only be one lady.

Yup. Knew it. Gosh some things never change

Hahahaha still as quick witted as ever

Oh! There's a bullet on the floor. Checkovs bullet.

Hear hear.

Gosh what an asshole

Oh she's got her gun back, the asshole don't know whats coming for him.

YEEEEEES AND THAT'S WHY WE LOVE HER

And bust out the kid on the way too!

Well that wasn't a very sturdy build was it

YESSSSSS AND THAT'S WHY WE LOVE HER

Omg train escape train escape

WHAT

What

LADY DETECTIVE WHAT

No?!

Omg omg them THEM THEM

OMG OMG COLLINS FAM PLUS ONE OMG SHE'S PREGNANT

Nah. She faked her death

Oh Jack. Oh. Oh he looks like shit. Oh Jack. She's not dead. She can't be dead, Jack.

Ohhhhh. You're gonna make me cry.

Oh and there's auntie Prudence.

OH MY GOSH ITS HER PLANE.

IT'S HER ITS HER I KNEW SHE WASNT DED.

WELL THATS ONE HECK OF AN ENTRANCE

No don't kiss bloody hell.

Uhhhhhhhh. Uhhhhhhhhhhhh. He's looking like a ghost. Uhhhhhhhhhhhh.

Well this do be awkward.

Oof.

Just hug him.

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO JACK NO.

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO DON'T.

AH WELL. BACK TO THE

Aunt Prudence being aunt Prudence. Asjadjahdis

Oh yeah! Fence it to the man. You go show him! ALLEZ!

Oh now we getting into the m y s t e r y.

Ayayayayayayay this guy sus. The uncle sus.

Oh and that fellow also sus. Why are they all awake anyway?!

Are you awake? No!

Oh he's done with the shit. He's so done. Come on Jack.

AHAHAHAHAHA damn it Jack, you've never let her walk into danger alone if you knew about her getting into danger. You sure as heck won't this time.

AHA! THERE'S THE MAN. Knew it.

OH WHAT THE FUUUUUUUCK

Bloody hell he's dead!

Yes we, you're part of this now Jack. Yes

Lmao. We love them.

Phryne like 👀 what this.

Fahnenflucht? What like he quit the military without permission?

Jack just like nope I'm not having it.

Oh someone is pissed but who is it. Damn.

SHE IS WHAT.

She

MARRIED

Okay so that's why he's pissed.

Damn. *Sigh*

Oh they do the 'Du' now. After so long.

I love them so much.

And of course the professor is still a flirt. Jack like 😐😐

Oooooooooooo what is the crypt of tears.

Oh we talking. Oh GODDAMN.

This is some epic shit here.

Well timed lightning strike for flair. Very mysterious.

Jack like, oh wtf why is it always her getting into this shit.

NO JACK

Fire!!!!!!!!!!!!

ES BRENNT ES BRENNT GO THE WTF

Oh. Oh no.

Wtf he go. Where he go

YES HE DIDN'T GET THE MACGUFFIN

Oh it was her mum's was it.

Jack being like I'm so sorry Ma'am.

Oh she's got a thing

She has a thing.

Omg that looks like the fucking golden compass from Dark Materials.

Miss Fisher and the heist movie. That's why we love her. First make sure no one is in the room then sneak in and do some light snooping.

Told ya the uncle sus. He sus.

Railways?! Huh?

OH NO HE IS BACK OH NO.

Oh window escape. Classic. Oh no she's been sussed out by Mr. Sus.

Hahaha! She standing on the windowsill like 🧍

NO DONT SHOW HIM THE MCGUFFIN

Oh no

Oh no.

They all got shot.

That was no sandstorm

Oh fuck. Poor girl. Poor little girl.

I love the music. Thars some swing right there.

Omg Jack is wearing a tophat. He looks ridiculous 😂

Yes! Dance! YES THEY DO. SNOOPING NWJILE DANCING. love the music.

Snooping while dancing. That's why we love them.

A gentleman's agreement lmao. Oof. You're too drunk, sir.

So much for that. Uh-oh

And there's the asshole from the beginning.

AND SOMEONE DEAD. OH. OH NO.

It's the uncle.

What the heck kinda gun is that.

"Wherever you go trouble follows"

"it's the other way around"

That's why we love her.

I like the butler.

Oh some serious deducting going on.

OH MY GOD THAT THING IS FUCKING BLOODY MASSIVE. ITS HUGE. ITS SO LARGE.

Threatening to shoot him in the foot lmaoooo

Aww Jack. He's like, DONT LEAVE ME AGAIN. What do I do if you don't come back?!

And so he's allowed to come.

Wait if they didn't give him the British pounds...where *are* they from

Ew. Gross. Sir.

Never bring a blade against three pistols yahaha.

As if you ever need my help

(ten seconds later)

Uhhh Jack? I need your help

OH MY GOD THIS IS HILARIOUS

Omg she married a gay man?!

She married a gay man to save his life! That's why we love her.

Jonathan is saying bullshit.

And she's having nightmares...?

Oh! Oh! They found it.

Eclipse is almost there too. No good no good.

Oh this is epic.

Oh is that her mother there.

OH NO IT WAS JONATHAN.

Crap in a cracker that's why he volunteered.

Oh SHUT THE FUCK UP SIR.

No way. It was

THE MOTHER FUCKING BUTLER?!!?!??

I did not see that bloody coming.

Until like five seconds before the reveal.

I'll admit I did not see that bloody coming.

Hurray! Happy end! Kinda. Now for the epilogue.

Ohhhhhh I get it now.

Awww I'm glad.

Jack like oh no not again. Put the gun down pls.

LIAR LIAR PANTS ON FIRE. HE SHOT IN THE AIR I SAW.

Oh my gosh. OH MY GOSH. It's happening again. FOR FUCKS SAKE JUST KISS ALREADY. oh my GOD THEY'RE SO FUCKING CUTE.

THEY FINALLY SAID I LOVE YOU OH MY GOD.FUCKING FINALLY THE SLOWEST SLOW BURN EVER. AWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW I LOVE THEM SO MUCH.

Folks. This was a good end. Or ....was it? Set up for a sequel? Also she's technically a widow now sooooooooooooo.......

Oh my gosh fucking epic.

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH THE ONLY TV SHOW WHERE ROMANCE IS TOLERABLE.

#mfmm posts #mfct #long post #mfmm spoilers #crypt of tears spoilers

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jynzandtonic · 3 years

Note

to make up for the pennywise looking ass hairline

i dont know if it's an edit, but! it gives me major teen clyde au vibes, like i just imagine him and the reader character being the shy quiet kids, best friends and him just wanting to give you a big sloppy kiss—he's still growing into his long limbs and large hands, this man is a walking baby giraffe—everytime he looks at you he goes all blushy. maybe he gets up the nerve to ask you out—although you should say in because you just ordered a pizza and watched a movie while trying to gauge how much contact should be happening. a sex scene comes on and the lead starts eating out the other, as i said he's still growing and lord knows it doesnt take much for pubescent teens to get rock solid. you hear him mumble through puffy lips "wanna do that to you", he wasn't expecting you to be up for it. so he's got the door locked and his chair in front of it so jimmy doesn't break in like he does, your bottoms are off and he's about ready to go feral from the sweet musky smell. he ghosts his fingers through your folds, fuck it's so warm, he thinks to himself. his mouth goes right down to your bud, sex ed was shit but his brother didn't want clyde to be completely clueless about sex. the soft intake of air from you mouth followed by a lone groan encouraged him to keep going, he sucked and licked at your cunt like a peach, like it was his last meal. he would be lying if he said he hadn't thought abiut this before, it was even better than his fantasies

anyway i wasn't intended to write all of this but here it is, not proofread and im shite at finishing smut

OH MY FUCK

OKAY WELL YOU HIT ME RIGHT IN THE INNOCENCE KINK

I’M DED

#rip in peace me #BYEEE #clyde logan #thirsty thots #strawberryjam scribbles #ily xoxoxoxo

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thespamman24 · 3 years

Text

Well, thing’s have started to wind down, but before me and my band mates leave there’s something we want to say.

Fifteen years ago, there was a dream. This dream, like most dreams was not real, and yet, it was also not fake. It happened when I was sleeping. This sleep, like most sleps happened when I was in my bed. The only problem, was their was no mattress in my bed. That ment that I was floating two feet above the ground as I slept.

Anyways,, I had this dream, and in this dream their was a dragon and he said “In ten years time Birdman will win best picture.” I thought that this was strange. What was a bird man? My dream then proceded to fall into surrealism, Michael Keaton appeared, and he was flying, and it was all very strange. Then I woke up, and I dismissed it as a dream. This was because it was a dream.

Flash foward to ten years later, and its 2015. I nock on my freinds door and ask him what the latest movie is. My frend knows all about movies, because he is the king of all movies, Hollwood himself. He told me that it was birdman. I instantly realized that this the film from my dream. i went then to the movie place, the place were you see movies, and i saw the birbman. the birdman was an egg, and out of this egg hatched michel keaton

“I am the birdman.” he said. This was beautiful, in fct it was so beautiful that everyone in the theater all started criing. However, I was not a one in that theater. I was a two.

I stood up and shouted.

“What makes you te right to be the birbman?” I screamed.

Michal katon then stared into my sol “because, I am you he said/”

I then opened up my sirt and I relaized that i wsa in fac, michel keton/

Oh, it was a moos horor of horrs! I scremed and scramed, but noone anwered, becuse god had gone on vakation.

I flel intu a trash, and ten yeors late, i was knot in tros. I walk out fo hotpsipal and sand in frunt is jon lenon i said

“Jon lennon?” your ded.

“No, he said. this is teh yer 1959. I was imedately overjyed

“mi nam is surgant pppeers. i” siad do yu wan to be in a ban?

I do noooot konw how to play”” jawn lneon siad

i will teach you

okay

i then wint an go pul, ring, and gege

and i sad i will tech play bec must famus ban eev.

heeowvr! hit in paln!

i is tim travel!!

is mci jgager sohw up nad and he kill!!!!!!! mic jegagr sow pu nda he mka go out

We go out of stile!!!!!!

no oh!

bad!

we earlise

tat tmie si

os we make a plan to mrueedr mic jegagr!

ew og bcak to the ftuure! seatl preetnd ot be dragon!!!

I tell frooomer slef “michale kiit”

tehn i go to michael keaton i say “I am producer i nee dhelp”

I have him star in my dream, and then I go and make birdman but oh no! michael keton shows up from dream! Now two michael keatons!

They schase me back through tmie to the 60s!

Teyh corner me and the ebatles in the corner of an alley, but then mic jagger shows up, in a car and he hits the two michael keatons.

And that’s how you kill two birds with one stone.

#shitpost

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is-gabenath-confirmt-yet · 3 years

Note

Theory: Nooroo's influence on Gabriel is to kinda teach him to submit to someone else(listening and stuff), Gabriel is letting Nooroo feel what its like to be in control(which what Nooroo WANTED) both Nooroo and Gabriel are too submitted to their goals(for nooroo freedom, for gabe uhh. Revive ded waifu) to understand their emotions and feelings.

Duusu's influence on Nathalie is her empathy(her last name is a joke). Her empathy is affecting Gabe(and to an extent Nooroo) to let them understand that they aren't alone. Besides, even Gabriel knows he can't be a stand-alone villain(as hawkmoth) and Duusu is basically, Nooroo's sunshine in the darkness.

Conclusion: Basically, Nooroo/Gabe/Hawkmoth is the person who has the ambition, while Duusu/Nath/Mayura is the one whose supporting them wholeheartedly, Despite the Man's impulsive and selfcentered ambition, he knows he can't do it alone, and he will be forever grateful for the woman who was in his side.

That's why Hawkmoth and Mayura are a good team—(i aint consenting them for their actions tho—)

Me: *reading the first line* My brain: “don’t imagen Gabe as a sub in bed, don’t, just. noooooo” Me *sweats* “Oh Neptune...” Anyway! I think Nooro is such a sofy and cutie he really dislikes it that Gabriel missuses his miraculous so much but I think he feels pitty for him too that he lost his Wife because of the magic of a Miraculous. I think if Gabriel chooses Targets they would get a long. For Nath and Duusu, I more thing Duusu gives her the confidence she needet to get closer to Gabriel. With Duusu Mayura tries to do things she never would dare to do as Nathalie. But yes. Duusu is the Sunnshine of the Group and the Sunlight for Nooro in the Darkness. Thats why her loosing most of her memories is even more sad since she now seems to be depressed as well..

#now I am sad again!#Why did you make Duusu loose her memories Thomas?#Why do you hurt me that way?#Give Duusu back to Nathalie!#The girls need to talk!#Duusu needs to be cheerful again!#ask #kwamis #I like such ask #BUT I AM STILL SAD

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shinjukuspiritcommittee · 4 years

Text

Top 20 2021

My Favorites (updated)

Hello my readers, it’s been a while since I just posted something not related to a headcanon and I am doing one right now. I just wanted to take a bit of a break to just get SOMETHING on here on my days off work. Plus I’m just trying to find my groove when it comes to writing again so hopefully this helps me just get back into the mood of making a post more often lol. I wanted to revisit this topic for a while just because we’ve had a lot more events and a lot more alts in the game were added. And I know for a fact LifeWonders reads these posts in some capacity because I have meme’d an AR into the game with my top picks from the last list I did for Christmas 2019. No I didn’t. I’m just joking around and I know LifeWonders doesn’t read this.

Anyways rather than just make up a list on the spot like last year I decided to use the Housamo Sortmaker (Link: https://club.housamo.xyz/sortmaker/ ) to try and make a list that’s more revealing to what I was thinking at the time. Since I talked about 20 characters ish last time I’m just gonna read from my 20th place to my 1st place spots and try to justify whatever I was thinking at the time. Anyways-

20: Marchosias and Susan: This one was a surprise for me if I’m being honest but I’m just gonna blame the fact on Shukou’s recent involvement with LifeWonders in the form of Live A Hero and how Ryekie and Mokdai live in my headspace rent free whenever I think about the characters in that game. Maybe we can see about getting some LAH headcanons since that’s a LifeWonders property too). So out of all the characters Shukou drew for Housamo why did I pick Marchosias? Easy, it’s been 4 years and this poor man has yet to receive a proper alt or any kind of skin for that matter and I think that it’s a crime. Sure he’s not my favorite but he’s definitely grown on me because he’s just a gentle dad kind of character and his design has grown on me over the years. I just hope he doesn’t get left behind since he has a lot of really interesting and potential things to look forward to in the future given how the main story has unfolded.

19: Shiva/Algernon: The helmet heads are together because DAI XT quickly became my favorite artist for Fire Emblem Heroes and I really just like their designs. DAI XT just knows how to draw robots, armor and muscles well. Also Chapter 11 with Shiva you can read into some interesting perspectives. I don’t want to spoil any of the untranslated content for anyone who’s waiting for the official english translation. But if you are curious Roureem has a blogspot where he posts summaries of the newly released events.

Link: https://housamosummaries.blogspot.com/

18: Cthugha: I love this goober so much. He’d constantly try to act super sentai just trying say good morning everyday. He may not be very bright but that just adds to his charm and honestly I enjoy how he always tries to play the hero in a lot of scenarios because it’s refreshing when they implement him after a bunch of heavy hitting story stuff. I’m not gonna spoil too much about it but I will say he’s more than welcome after everything Chapter 10 and 11 put the reader through.

17: Mineaki: I’ve made a post about him being one of my least favorites way back when I first started this blog and let me just say how times have changed and I’ve learned the value of not judging a book by it’s cover. I still think there’s something a bit off about Kowmei’s style for his characters, but Mineaki has definitely grown on me. He’s a caring instructor who does watch out for his students even if it’s not always in the most direct way possible. Not to get into too many spoilers he’s got a lot of intrigue around him as well and I am curious to see his role get expanded down the line.

16: Ded: Housamo is the reason I really like christmas. The Christmas stories despite following a similar structure to each other do tend to be my favorite stories. Ded himself is also just another good dad character. He’s also two guys for the price of one, so I mean… you know… you’ve got the forever ask your other dad situation. There wasn’t much thought put into this choice I just like santa as a concept because I think the outfits are cute, it’s always nice to get something for people you care about on Christmas and Ded is the perfect embodiment of both sides to Christmas.

15: Shinya: Everyone we need to manifest buff Shinya for 2021, this is not a drill. This is legitimate. We must make Taromati’s and my wish come true. To be more serious again he’s just a sweet and gentle character. He’s also drawn by my favorite Housamo artist. Their characters always just look so naturally good. I’m just surprised he hasn’t gotten much of an alt given he’s perfect material for Valentine’s day. He’s just a soft boy and I would love for him to be in more things because I just enjoy seeing him.

14: Jacob: I have to be honest Jacob is on here because every time I look at him he just gets more handsome to me. I wasn’t all that impressed with his introduction and we don’t know much about his background but I’ve just been drawn to him more and more. Maybe it’s just because he’s drawn by GomTang? I just like looking at him and I can’t help it. To speak a bit less crass he’s another gentleman kind of guy and those are always nice.

13: Shennong: Yeah I like the doc a lot. Firstly, I’m a huge sucker for big bulls and Shennong fits the bill. The white fur really adds to his appeal visually and the purple horns give off a bit of an unnatural appearance. Shen feels like someone who’s been touch starved and alone for a long time given how he acts as a character and when we actually hug him I just lost it. He always has others well being on his mind so he’s not afraid to jump in and help, or give a much needed lecture about when you need to take better care of yourself. He just comes across as very well balanced overall.

12: Heracles: I won’t lie- at first he didn’t interest me much. He looked incredibly plain when among the rest of the cast and he seemed like the typical “bait” character since the banner had Echo, Barguest, Gyumao and Snow. But after reading the translation for Valentine Time Slip I was taken aback at how much of a gentle giant he turned out to be and I just really liked his interactions with the others in that event. And honestly his special quest from that year was one of the more unique ones given the slower pace and more romantic vibe it had. After the event warmed my heart I did a complete 180 and I just knew I really liked him.

11. Yasuyori: Before I start praising him I feel I have to justify why he didn’t quite make top 10 and it will have some mild Chapter 10 spoilers. To be as vague as possible his resolution just didn’t vibe with me at the end of Chapter 10. Like it wasn’t a bad resolution and it was the right choice to make but in my opinion there really wasn’t a moment I felt was clear where he made a choice for himself. Everything just sort of happened around him and it felt like he didn’t really do much to improve his situation. To an extent I kind of see that being the idea given his origins and the story he’s based on and there is some semblance of him coming to terms with himself alongside his isolation being portrayed pretty well, but I just wasn’t satisfied with it as much as I would like to be. With that out of the way, oh my god I just want this boy to never stop smiling and I just want to give him hugs constantly please he just deserves to be happy!!! Yasuyori is a character who’s got a lot of baggage and he’s just trying to find ways to properly cope with his trauma and not repeat past mistakes and I just really like that idea. His role in Xmas 2020 (sorry I just forgot the name of that event, but its when he gets his alt) was a much better representation for his character in my eyes. I’m not gonna spoil anything like I keep saying but he isn’t one to disappoint in future appearances and I just hope this lovable lug keeps getting the support he deserves.

10: Hephaestus: A spicy way to start the latter half of the list. I just want to give this lad a hug and tell him he is worthy of love. But at the same time he is a little shit… and I love that. I can’t fully explain why I grow a paternal instinct in me seeing this grown man sob about his mother but I just do. I want to keep him safe and give him all the affection he wants. Though I am aware a lot of Hephaestus’s interest in his parental figure is… questionable. I am just gonna say I would accept his love for what it is and he just wants approval.

9. Shuten: I’ll be honest I have no proper reason for why I like Shuten so much. He’s just a cool and reliable guy. He just seems like a go with the flow kind of person most of the time and he’s a bit more direct than most of the characters which I always appreciate. Plus I have an unspoken bias for naop guys in Housamo.

8. Durga: While not number 1 on this list, I still really like Durga. She’s quirky but not to an annoying degree, she’s determined and definitely very confident in her own abilities. Her growing to be more sociable throughout her events is something I enjoy seeing because it really creates this sense of growth.

7. Kyuma: I get a lot of people don’t like Kowmei’s art but I really think we should look past it because Kyuma is one of the sweeter picks. He’s someone who just wants to prove himself for his own worth and not what David can provide, but David is part of him and it just creates the potential for a good arc. Plus this boy is unintentionally smooth and will just take your heart when possible. I honestly want to see Kyuma more in events because he’s honestly the jock that carries 3 of the 4 brain cells. He’s also the last one without an alt so I’m just hoping he gets one in 2021 because he really deserves one in my opinion. (Also fan art makes him really cute).

6. Tomte: Tomte is relatively new but honestly his event in 2019 really endeared me to him. I’m trying to be spoiler free because the best way to enjoy these stories is for yourselves but let me just say his arc in the event was really endearing to me and much more than I was expecting. His fan service is also incredibly hammy and I love it. Visually Tomte is one of my favorites, I love his multi colored hair and starlit pupils cuz it makes his otherwise more generic look have some flare. I knew I liked him out the box and when I read about him in the summaries and can’t wait to read the official translation for him. I was just very endeared.

5. Tetsuya: Tetsuya fucks. Moving on…

Jokes aside this one’s a bit simple. I have no shame in admitting I think he’s attractive and his whole resistance towards wanting a relationship is cute in a weird roundabout way. When he says no I just want it MORE. I just really like duo haired tsunderes.

4. Kengo: Kengo 3rd alt 2021. Please LifeWonders I need my favorite Summoner. He’s a bro and that’s what counts. Kengo has got your back, not afraid to rely on you, a very fun and dynamic guy. Sure he’s not that bright when it comes to making plans or any book smart, but there are times where he’s the best at being able to read the room or just understand what someone needs to hear even if it isn’t always what someone wants to hear. His bullheaded nature is actually one of his redeeming qualities because it’s nice to just not overcomplicate things and just understand what’s actually going on. Yes the early story didn’t do many favors for him but to me the events, especially the later ones, do much more work for his character. To me, at least.

3. Ashigara: Ashigara is best bear, and I will defend that stance in 2021. The main thing that draws me to Ashigara is that I can see a bit of myself in him. He gets very emotional when he gets left alone, he’s very loud when with his friends, has a tendency of speaking his mind- just someone who wears his heart on his sleeve. I also appreciate that in spite of the negative he isn’t someone who backs down when the going gets tough and in a few instances he’s able to hold his ground physically at least.

2. Wakan Tanka: Love at first sight. This ray of sunshine still persists as the number 1 husband, but number 2 character. Firstly I am a huge fan of the partial beast aesthetic. The buffalo ears and the horns are absolutely adorable. Secondly he’s a perfect body type; he’s not too muscular but not exactly flabby. Third he is just so positive and I love that. He’s someone I admire and wanna hug.

1. Taurus Mask: The more things change the more they stay the same. I’m still a big Taurus Mask fan for all the same reasons as last time. I just… relate to this boy. He is an incredibly shy boy who uses his public persona for confidence. Maybe I’m reading too much into it but it’s like we’re soul bros!

So yeah, my tastes haven’t changed in a year and a half.

#tokyo afterschool summoners #housamo #Just Thoughts #qna #sfw

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phckingusername · 4 years

Text

GUYS!!! HEXBUG AU

Connor and Nines are a form of robotic aliens there ship in danger and their bodies inactive, they and their crew have escaped the immediate threat but uploading themselves into what we know as hexbugs made for smaller and more efficient travel when necessary. the two brothers escape pod lands on earth on the roof of the DPD. Making their way to the main floor, they observe the planet and it's organic inhabitants. Gavin finds the little robotic on his desk while Hank is unaware of Connor for now. Gavin looks it over in his hand and puts it down on his desk where Richard/nines decides to move around in a bit of a panic. It looks random to gavin and he is entertained by the toy. He's not sure where it came from or who's it is or why it's on his desk, but he's keeping it. Maybe it's a new toy that's coming out for Christmas. Maybe he can hand it over to his brother to look at. Make sure it isn't some kind of military spy tech. Most likely he thinks he just might be out of touch. He puts it in his pocket.

In Richards view he is scared of being broken. After all this is his last link at life. His soul is stored in this small weak form if it breaks he dies. Connor is talking to him but when Gavin leaves for home they get to far and their signal Is lost.

At home gavin empties his pockets and basically forgets about Nines due to his hunger and work tired body. Gavin is in the other room watching TV while he eats when he hears the buzzing on the table. What is that? Getting up he remembers his new toy.

It's on its side wedged between his keys. Nines view he is panicking again being unable to get up and under the attention of the organic alien. He is unsure of the species temperament. He doesn't want to die. Not like this. Gavin picks him up and looks for a switch. There Is none. 'dont handle me like that' Richard thinks

He puts he down and Nines stops buzzing. "What happened? Is it broken?" He taps his finger on its pointed back.

'oh ra9 it's angry now' nines thinks and he takes his chances to escape the organic alien and vibrates away from gavins hand again.

He trys to leave the table but gavin catches it before it falls. "the fuck is wrong with this thing?" He asks holding it in his open palm

The light inside turns bright red and the buzzing seems to convey a trembling. Gavin gets a silly impression that it's afraid.

"What are you?" He asks confused about the objects purpose.

He continues to shake.

When Gavin has the free time he takes it to his brother

"I've looked online and I can't find anything about it. Not sure if it's broken or something. Doesn't have a on off switch and it has different lights and shit in it. What is it?"

"I'm not sure. Where did you find it?" Eli asks casually looking it over.

"On my desk."

Nines begins to shake again and the transparent parts of his body glows red.

"See there it goes again. Is it low on battery?"

"Doesn't look like it."

"Well it's not important anyway. Just thought you might know something about it. Given you're into tech and all." He takes it back and his light turns yellow.

'no disassemble.' (lol)

They hang out and Gavin eventually goes home

Nines learns not to move when the organic known as Gavin is near. But his light still turns yellow when he enters the room.

Gavin pays it very little mind. And Richard wonders how his brother is doing.

At some point Gavin notices the way it moves is like it's being controlled by someone rather than random movement and he is highly suspicious that it is a kind of spy ware.

He busts it moving around and he decides to talk to who ever is listening in. And first it doesn't move or respond in any way. But Gavin gets it to blink yes and no questions.

He grins and is satisfied with himself at having figured out a fly in the wall. He is convinced that it is being controlled by an fbi agent or something and continues to talk to it. First asking it questions but then simply talking about whatever. He knows he hears him, and the government is listening in to everyones conversation anyways, but it's kind of nice knowing someone is on the other side, even if they don't want to listen or care, it serves them right for spying on Gavin.

Meanwhile Richard listens, and listens, and responds in what ways he can asked something. Apparently Gavin is under a false impression but it still helps take the edge off. Richard learns a lot about Gavin and his own little piece of the world and his life. Organics are not so different from his own people.

(You ever read a romance story between a human and an alien Hexbug? Lol)

Is the little Hexbug getting feelings for the human? Did the drunk human forget about the little spy and please himself in bed? AtTrAcTiOn???????

Alphabets on paper. Snarky replies, "geez didn't know you were such a smart ass." Ask for help. "I'm not gullible." Reluctant Acceptance, realization.

Connor is chilling under a ded bonsai he is more than concerned about his brother. He is back in range and is infact coming right towards him. Gavin snatches Connor from the desk but Hank is pissy about Gavin taking something from his desk. Eventually Gavin convinces Hank he didn't take anything.

Goes to his brother Eli where he is laughing at Gavins little joke. With both Connor and Richard together they manage to link their internal thought into glitchy text on one of eli's computer screens.

With this they manage to convince Eli and give him the information to the means of helping them and their ship. While Eli is working on that Gavin can actually have conversations with the thing now. Learns it's name is Richard and all about his sarcastic sassy, snarky, smart ass, genuine, gentle personality. He gets along with his new little robo friend.

It takes a little over a year for their ship to get to earth.

When they step inside everyone is on the floor with their chassis exposed. They look odd and dead. Gavin is and isn't surprised by this. Which one is Richard?

It takes even longer to figure out what happened to them. And longer still to fix them. But Connor and Richard help Eli understand and fix the problems they physically can't.

But one day it happens. One day Gavin wakes up and the Hexbug is not glowing at all. He's not sleeping, if he were the light would be a dim throbbing (oof maybe not that word. Slowly going on to off to on again) white. But the light is just off and Gavin is afraid he's ded. He runs to find his brother when he bumps into a broad chest.

He thinks it's a human man trespassing in his brother's home, but Richard clears up Gavins confusion.

"But you didn't look like this on the ship."

"Our synthetic skin was deactivated along with everything else. We, do not like to be seen that way."

AtTrAcTiOn!!!!! "This is your body?"

"Yes."

Lol gavin has the hots for a robo man who used to be a Hexbug. And the robo man has the hots for the organic bag of meat flesh. The feck is this story.

Its time for the brothers to collect the rest of their people across the cosmos. You know what that means!!! Ask the two organics to go with them!!!!!! And they both say yes! Out in space Gavin stands in awe at the view and he's flustered about his feelings for the former Hexbug. Richard is not so stand off ish. He's a lot more bold with his approach. "I can read you vitals and I've come to understand them." Mentions the time Gavin gave himself some loving and how richard uses that for reference for when Gavin is aroused. Along with other regular moments he used as a base line.

Guess who ends up naked in the same room? Lol. Gavin is surprised at the display

"I told you before, we are not so different from each other. Perhaps we share our point of origin."

"You don't know?"

"Do you truly know your beginning?"

(~Let's get physical, physical. Come let's get physical~)lol I can't even

Hey yo explore space get the peeps back and safe and the. Decide to return to earth.

"My brother and I would like to explore your planet. It is new and awful. I can not stop thinking about the place you call home."

"Do you want to be a part of it?"

THE FUCK IS THIS STORY. I FUCKING CAN'T. OH MY GOD. THIS IS RIDICULOUS. HOLYSHIT.

#dbh #detroit become human #rk900 #gavin reed #dbh richard #dbh nines #my writing #reed900 #rk800 #dbh connor #rk brothers #hexbug au #dbh elijah #elijah kamski

53 notes · View notes

wench-and-jezebel · 2 years

Text

Devour Reaction:

Jezebel (@typicalopposite) reacts [with occasional asides by Wench (@scripted-downfall)]

Bby Ackles [bby Ackles :)]

[Realizing that the entire movie is contained in the startup and you just. don't realize it yet. but anyway] ☠️☠️☠️☠️

God his kids look just like him

Anne Kilton 👀🤣 [I KNOW! When I tell you this film has SPN vibes… Not a lie]

Dean!

Sir, that’s not- Leave. Run! Your white is showing

THE FUCK IS HE DOING WITH THE GUTS [The fact that you haven't gone hunting before is showing] ☠️☠️☠️ Blechhhh

Now a baby??? BUDDY GTFO. FLEE

Mysterious cabin in the woods

Nekked crying person

SIR

[The end. He ded. Sorry, did you think Jackles was in the whole thing? Oh wait :)]

The voice

[Weirdo monologues are back: Max-coded] Talking in circles

Oh nooo drugs [Dean-coded protective streak pt. 1]

TF [Dean-coded protective streak pt. 2]

[His jacket tho... Dean-coded] RIGHT?! But also… Wtf?! The kid was just gonna shoot them?!

Oooo, bitch

Wot. Is happening. [She was getting the champagne and intentionally being provocative] Oh shit

She favors Kirsten Dunst [Yup, agree]

Yeet. You just gave the lagoon monster a weapon

Ma’am [You mean that’s not how computers work?]

You burn candles on your laptop? Again... Ma’am

“YeH, I pushed a button.” You idjit.

“Watch your fucking language” ☠️☠️☠️ [I hate his boss btw]

Alan Ackles has arrived

Bruh his dad reminds me of your dad 👀☠️ [ASDFASDFADF YOU'RE NOT WRONG] Lemme find out you’re related to the Ackles [I would pass the frick away] I would too! ☠️☠️☠️

[Dean-coded protective streak pt. 3]

WOT

BRUH ITS WILD CHARLIE [Dean-coded protective streak pt. 4]

[Buddy, I love you, but please ask why your friend is demanding your personal info and typing on a computer] ☠️☠️☠️

Wait is this uncoolness again [His friends are very uncool throughout the film: you'll see]

Huh. Uh, y’all run. HE CRAZY

[I love his acting in this scene. The turkey line is so well done too aalksdfj]

WHY CANT THIS MAN HAVE GOOD FRIENDS??? EVER???

BRUH [Did I mention friends putting personal information into random computer programs = not good idea?] LIKE… dude!

Ohhh noooo

Bruh… I’m tripppinnn lol this movie is wild [I KNOW RIGHT]

[Get ready for hate-his-boss hours]

BRUH

BRUH. BRUHHHH!!! WHAT AN ASSHOLEEEEEE!!

["You wouldn't have let Conrad sign you on" HE DIDN'T KNOW?!!?!?] RIGHT?!?

Can this dude keep a mom!!?? [I say nothing… I love them tho]

[Dean-coded protective streak pt. 5] 😭😭😭😭

Say you want him in your pants/skirt without saying it ma’am

[This mom's better at the love-life-meddling than Mary]

He’s so cute thoooo [I KNOWWWW]

☠️☠️☠️☠️ Buddy

[I love Jackles in this whole scene… His smirk/fist pump thing alskdfj *chef's kiss*]

He’s too cute… I can’t even [I KNOWWWWWWWWWW]

Ma’am.

Sir.

Masir.

It’s. Not. Like. This. What is she. DOING. TO HIS HEAD. WHAT. AM I WATCHING WOMAN??? I HAD TO TURN THE VOLUME DOWN. ☠️☠️☠️☠️☠️☠️☠️☠️☠️☠️ [I did warn you about this scene]

AND SHE JUST WALKS AWAY

[Okay, two things… a) I love Jackles playing the romantic type. And b) the promised friend-uncoolness] *huff sigh*

Bruh why does the voice on the phone sound like him 🤔🤔

Jump scareeee ☠️☠️

Bruh that’s the devilll run [Okay, but. To be fair. His entire life is vaguely concerning rn. Buddy's head ain't even safe]

The smileeee! Isss too cute

Ooooof Wench’s dad, run!

Oh shit [He didn't run] Reverse daydream???

Ah! A k! Ack!!!

Nope. I almost passed out for that one. Bruh.

[Dean-coded protective streak pt. 6. And continued friend uncoolness. At least he apologized immediately, unlike SOME people] 🥺🥺

Uh ohhh he in trouble

Or something

Runnnnnn

[Oh, I forgot that intercourse bit, sorry.] Oooooof. They ded. [They did the deed in a horror movie; isn't that, like, a cardinal rule?] ☠️☠️☠️☠️ Fair. But they didn’t even get to finish

Buddy. DONT WALK INTO A CRIME SCENE. [HE'S CONCERNED FOR HIS FRIEND; CUT HIM SOME SLACK]

OH SHIT THE TONGUE. BLECH

[Dean-coded hug right there.] WITH JODY [And guilt complex. Poor buddy getting blamed by other people again, too] RIGHT!? ["You coulda brought the gun to me" Yeah, you see how me reporting someone else's crime went this time; of course I could have]

Oh no sad music [Buddy's friend just died; I think it's deserved alkdsfj]

Buddyyyy 🥺🥺🥺 Oh noooo

Oh nooooooo [Wot?] The little "son" got me

The way he says “Ok” *dissolves*

[I do like his "play it cool" line. Is so cute alksdjf Help]

Clothes change [Jonathan/Wayne Stranger Things jacket]

Oooop look at that he’s drinking [also Wench's dad-coded]

[Jake's look when daddy grabs his arm is a bit. Concerning.] 🥺🥺🥺🥺 Yep

*sigh* Poor Jake/Tom/Dean

“Marisol” Like aerosol [alskdjf]

[Frecklessss!!! That's the most pronounced I've ever seen them] I KNOWWW

BRUH She got that crazy look in her eye. Don’t go. DONT BRING YOUR FRIEND.

*sigh*

[Did I mention romantic!Jackles is so great compared to the emotionally-repressed character he usually plays? Like, nothing against those roles — I love them, too — but it’s a nice change.] I KNOWWWWW! IMAGINE. JUST FREAKINGGGG IMAGINEEEEE. HIM WOOING CAS LIKE THIS. Poor buddy would combust! [Is trueeee]

Aight… I’m calling it the pathway is them. At least their voices. They are calling themselves.

[Love her ringssss] I knowwww

Blech. Blechhhh! Fingers

POOR BUDDY

Susssssspciousssss

I am Native American; I can confirm they probably do weird shit like that

Buddy only been with this girl 10 mins and she’s already pouring his coffee; I’ve been with my husband 15 years and he pours his own shit ☠️

FREAKING MOVIES KISSING. THOSE FIRST THREE WERE JUST FITTING THEIR MOUTHS TOGETHER

the cat 🤣☠️☠️☠️☠️☠️☠️ Tf

👀👀👀 I seeee you

Roar

[Get ready for more Dean-coded]

Well damn Jake can’t catch a break-

WHAT THE FUCK BUDDY HE DED

*sigh*

“Give rest o christ… cause you have took half our town already. Please chill out” (I’m going to hell)

[btw, SPN-coded lore-gathering session] Right! [The lights are pretty tho. He be pretty too]

The priest is like this is ABOVE my pay grade

IF HE CUTS HIS TONGUE ONE MORE TIME AACKK

i just kept the tat… ya know… cause- ☠️☠️☠️

☠️☠️☠️☠️☠️ [My dude slandering Metallica]

[The dog's name is Sammy asdlf *Now* who's getting replaced with a dog?!]

☠️☠️☠️☠️☠️☠️☠️☠️

[I am waitinggggg for your reaction to the ending of this film btw; seems like is gonna be gold] 🤣🤣🤣🤣 [Edit: I was right. Be warned about the increase in cursing alskdjf]

Well shit. Poor devil guy

Ooooooh the plotttt thickenssss

[Early Jackles films has him brooding and staring at things a lot] 🤣🤣🤣

More sitting, more staring [tbf, buddy pulls off the Heathcliffe aura real well]

Ahh! It came in handy!

Oooooooh! Devil shit!

A GHOST

OH SHIT

why Jake gotta go to hell? He’s so sweet [You'll see] And cute ☠️☠️

[WAIT OH HOLY SHIT OH MY GOD THAT’S AMES WHITE FROM DARK ANGEL] What?!? 👀👀 [You'll understand the significance later… for now, @witchy-writer-lady and I shall keep the secrets]

👀👀👀

👀👀👀👀👀👀

OH WAIT!

OOH SHITTTT!!!

LE GASSSPPP!

[aka: this entire movie is trying to sell us on the fact that this lil ray of sunshine is the spawn of Satan laksfdj]

OH SHIT [Bye bye Ames] WHOOOPSIE

BITCH YOU DED

[btw, um. You thought that twist was something. Wait for the next one.] WAIT. Is tarot girl ANNE?!?! Pls Say- [I say nada] Womannnnnnnn she gave him the smooches! That’s not ok [I DID NOT CONFIRM] Like I know he is foineeee but it’s not ok! If it is the case

Oh shittttt

WHY WOULD YOU GRAB THE BLOODY KNIFEEEE??! BUDDY, WHATCHA DOIN THERE?!?! [Okay but horror movie, weapon = good]

This fucking movieeeeee- [Is not done yet] Is wilddddd

Ooof

Ohhhh shit… That’ll do it. He gonna snap [aslkdjf] And start killing with the pick axe [ALSKDFJ]

[That was. That was a yes on the momma thing.] I CALLED IT. ACK. ACKKKK. ACKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKK. KKKKKKKKKKKK. KKKKKKKKKKK. NOOOOOOOOOOO.

VSIDUEBEBSZKIZHSSGV I CANT

I CANT

IMEOT

WOR

How type? I can’t

DEVIL

WHAT THE FUCK IS HAPPENINGGGGG

[Sam-letting-Dean-turn-into-a-vampire-scene-coded. Which is kinda concerning given the. Undertones. of that scene.] BLEHCH

WELL SHIT

SHORT END. EVERYTIME

– – –

Endpoint Reaction:

Wench: I want you to know that I've been cackling at your reaction this whoel time

Jezebel: FUCK COFFEE I NEED LIQUOR ADTET THAT. I STILL CANT TUPE

Wench: asdk

Jezebel: I’m just- Yeah.

Wench: I'm dying of laughter rn

Jezebel: I just…. What. Why. His mother. She was his mother. “I can be anything you need me to be” HOW ABOUT A DECENT FUCKING MOTHER YOU MANIPULATIVE DEVIL BITCH

Wench: One of the few films where Jackles comes out with two parents still alive, and it’s only true because he had four at the beginning and lost two along the way aldskfj

Jezebel: Well, three, ‘cause he killed her too

Wench: Nah, she didn't die

Jezebel: Wtf. But she was dead at the end, wasn’t she?

Wench: The human vessel was. And that's a maybe. We don't know for sure. But she's definitely alive enough to force-feed him blood and shit, so

Jezebel: Oooh. Blech. His MOTHER. Who wroteeee this shit. Bleach. I need bleach for my eyessss

Wench (aside to the audience): She’s never forgiving me.

Jezebel: I just ☠️☠️☠️☠️ Ok I’m good I think

Wench: aklsjdf

Jezebel: It was a pretty good movie. Until the end. That happens a lot in Ackles case.

Wench: Do you see what I mean by, his acting was actually, like, really good? Especially in that context?

Jezebel: Yess! Buddy just couldn’t get a good ending if it was standing right in front of him… Ten Inch Hero next, so I can be equally pissed at the ending but in a happier tone. Maybe tomorrow?

Wench: YEAH. FINALLYYYY. Sandwich shoppe, here we come!

Jezebel: Ending note. SHE WAS HIS FUCKINGMOTHER!?!?

#devour #devour 2005 #jake gray #jensen ackles #this was an adventure #jezebel (pr)#reactions #horror movie reactions #horror #horror movies

11 notes · View notes

zumpietoo · 3 years

Text

Umm....no, once again, Zalben is NOT “pals” with RAS....not even sure they’ve ever met....plus there isn’t “all this anti-BH stuff”, BH is simply ded. Has been for like 2+ years, now....maybeeee....I’d grant you “hibernating Rip Van Winkle style”, but, for the moment---ded, been ded, staying ded. And this has been the verrrrryyyyyy active case for over a year, onscreen.

Obviously they want people to “fall”, but to an extent----they also don’t GAF, cuz back to the same shit we always explain to your morons....plus, again, these ships are no longer “new”----again, been happening for well over a year now.

And, again, Zalben writing a dimwitted fic is hardly show promotion.

“Ship swapping”?? WTF is that like “wife swapping”? Dude...however, yes....the rest is also known by its name “basic, common sense. To the rest, there is no “stakes raising” and your naive concept that tumblr proves dick is fucking anecdotal evidence hilarious....

Soooo....now a glorified fanboi writing a somewhat Jabi fic is an “external entity/coordinated effort”??? Good lord, you’re an batshit insane idiot. Nooo...plus, so fucking what? And if yes, that’s painfully meandering use of marketing resources. This a network TV show, not your mommy’s garage sale.

Mr. 58 Seconds isn’t remotely a “journalist” and he’s only dependent on the show including him in press calls/ideally peeps interacting with him for interviews. If his readers aren’t interested, he will simply cover a different show, you fucking moron (it’s precisely WHY TVLine pulled Plaiderdale, they didn’t feel there WAS enough interest to recap---I’m sure Bramesco now recaps something else. WTF do you think happens when shows go off the air, idiot?)

Now, literally, again, it’s a commie/fascist plot to brainwash us into submission and accepting our Nu Jabitha Overlords, is it??? Jesus fucking, tap dancing CHRIST!

If you wished to do this “in peace”, you wouldn’t be trolling here, you wouldn’t seek out such shit, you wouldn’t make sock accounts---actually, you wouldn’t even watch the show (and would’ve stopped at the end of season FOUR)---because what you described is a fanfic bubble....which you’re free to chill in, but that’s hardly your goal.

And, again, I’m still laughing that you legit think they’re trying to gaslight you (when you’re a premiere member of the GG, yourself).

Oh and here you’re doing so....BH does not have “continued popularity” and, as long as the show has sweet Netflix cash, they’re chill, anyway....

THEY WILL NEVER TAKE OUR SLIZZYSTAN SOULS!!!! RESIST THE EVVOLLLL JABI MAN!!! POWER TO THE SLIZZYSTANS!!! SOYLENT GREEN IS PEOPLE!!!

Just want to add as head loony/charter GG president...I’m all in on this conspiracy theory. Cuz I also blabber about “going to war”, as if I fucking matter in any way, shape, size or form...

Nooo....Snorty, you’re seeing “much” (and it isn’t enough for meeeee!!!) Jabi “pimping”, because half the couple is the show’s actual star/unquestionable biggest draw and he’s paired with a similarly gifted leading lady, now....

Will it work? It already has and it doesn’t fucking matter. You’re also, again, a fucking year behind things, here, moron...

OFC they’re not going to promote something that isn’t happening, you fucking dumbass....If it were “hot garbage”, it wouldn’t be happening and continue to happen, you fucking idiot....it’s why Grody Grundy was so quickly scrapped.

God you are beyond stupid.

Right. They don’t care because they don’t fucking have to. No, they only need concern themselves over sweet Netflix cash.....plus the show’s in its SIXTH season.....with a likely seventh. Hardly the failure/disaster you’re trying to pretend it is, dumbass.

No, we aren’t.

Dude, REAL Jug stans LOVE Jabi, why TF wouldn’t we? No, they aren’t. Plus, again, if they were “scrambling to drum up support”, they certainly wouldn’t do it by having a fanboi write and quickly delete ONE lukewarm at best fic.

Again, dude.....nooo. But I do love how fucking ignorant you’ve proven yourself to be.

Ummm....thatiranianracist? It’s already been “longterm”. Jabi have been a thing for over a year. You chose to ignore it, but that’s on YOU...plus, as far as we know, their promotional budget is largely the same, so they’d promote it thru moar effective channels.

Sidenote, I find it abjectly hilarious to see you thinking one fanboi’s lukewarm fic is PUSHING JT SO HARD and that you also think they GAF what any of your little crew think. And that it has you, two days later STILL this upset.

BTW, Barfie was always the second/third most popular ship dude....so fail on that....are you thinking of VD?

Laughing at how you don’t know A) it’s called “promo” or B) that one, lukewarm fic is now “constant begging”. The obvious solution to your massive stupidity is to stop watching or go google what shit means...

They DGAF....and they did...cuz plenty of us now see BH for how toxic it always was. Additionally, again, dude....it’s a TEE VEE SHOW...and, again, casual viewers already dig it.

“Respect their audience”??? Is that YOUR code for “didn’t give me my way”? Cuz sure seems that way!

OMG Izzy remains the dumbest one here. Dude, it doesn’t fucking matter who they “blame” because it’s a TEE VEE SHOW. Also, again, for Paleyfest you seriously think peeps being assholes is laudable? IF it were to happen?

No, Snorty, but your denial and gaslighting sure is! Plus not “six years in”, it was four and after Slizzy’s betrayal, works for mee! Plus they didn’t have a choice, you idiot....go thank your kween.

I do----cuz I’m a Jug stan, not a Slizzystan...now it’s a “desperate surge”??? How dramatic..

Moar “don’t understand or respect”. Again, nope, they didn’t give you assholes what you wanted. Suck it.

They didn’t merely “bank on it”, they know it. And no it hasn’t, but, here’s the thing, nobody GAF what you think. Also, the ones whose “popularity has diminished” are Barfie...cuz jackasses...

And nobody cares if you will or not...plus except for Snorty, none of you even still watch. And I question if she really does. Or ever did.

And most of you are noobies/socks, anyway....but all this endless “populairty” chatter does explain the point of your socks....

Wow....two whole pieces....and was that your previous url, then? Funny how similar they are....or mah guess, you’re Jug/Cole long time hater Trashfor...

Yes, yes, just keep repeating it and it will be true Snorty. Nobody GAF, BTW...

How DARE they progress the plot in a way that displeased us???? And again, nope and doesn’t matter, cuz we have canon and you have whining...

SUCK IT!!!!

0 notes

littlespaceporgs · 4 years

Text

The Clone Wars Reacts - Part 5

Or Leah loses her shit at Jar Jar, thirsts for Aayla Secura for an episode and a half, and then swoons for Riyo Chuchi.

Welcome once more to the Reacts series! I’m a busy woman for now but I am setting up a schedule for this series which will be

Today we’re covering episodes 12, 13, 14 and BONUS! 15. This is because I got super bored during episode 14 and basically didnt write anything so, here you go! As per usual, major spoiler alert for season 1 of the clone wars! If you haven’t read the previous parts to this series, I suggest you do so that you can follow along!

Part 1 - Episodes 1 and 2 Part 2 - Episodes 3, 4 and 5 Part 3 - Episodes 6, 7 and 8 Part 4 - Episodes 9, 10 and 11

Tags (if you want to join, my taglist can be found on my page!): @likeshootingstarsinthenightsky @girlvader @simping-for-fives @littlevodika @hounding-around @pro-fangirls-unsocial-life @onabouteverything @acciokenobi @catsnkooks @captainrexstan @roseofalderaan @fractiouskat

We’re well past the half-way point, so there is 2 parts left of season 1, and then onto season 2! So lets get into it!

Episode 12: The Gungan General

> heheheheheheheh jar jar I am KEEN

> I get hondo and jar jar in one episode

>> this’ll be funny

>>> actually no scratch that, this is gonna be hilarious

> oh and they woke up in a cell this will be fun

> HAHAHAHHAHAHAHA AND THEYRE BOUND TO DOOKU

> DISASTER I TELL YOU

> “if I keep my mouth shut you’ll devise a plan so get off the god forsaken planet?” “YES”

> this dude seems traitorous as fuck (im referring to one of the pirates, not dooku shockingly)

> I wish Ahsoka and Yoda were in this too, I want more disaster lineage

> ah he is indeed a traitor

> “HEIDY HO CHANCELLOR”

> JAR JAR WHOO

> “stop messing around, we’re landing. Secure yourself” “MESA TRYING ITS STUCK”

> promptly followed by jar jar falling everywhere

> oh and now he’s in the cockpit

> oh shit that senator guy is definitely dead right?

> “do control tour protégées insolence” “anakin, control your insolence, the count is concentrating”

> “do we know where we’re going?” “Ssh anakin” “DO we know where we’re going?”

> is it safe? Of course it i- riiiiiight

>> I forgot this was the clone wars for a second, this is gold

> FRIENDS DONT DRUG FRIENDS HONDO

> y’know, dooku’s quite amusing when he’s not trying to kill my favourite characters

> “are you now in command” “uh no, binks is the highest ranking” ooooohhhh boy

> ooooooohhhh and some mind tricks too, nice

> I hate to say this, but jar jar is actually smart

> holy shit

> beasties are nearby too, we’ll be fine. they run, we run

>> Dayum jar jar actually making good decisions?

> I present a real and accurate image of my reaction to this statement

> Mesa be having an idea oooohhh booooyyy

> obi wan that is no way to speak to your grandmaster

> be patient master the count is elderly and doesn’t move like he used to

> I would kill you both now if I didn’t have to drag your bodies

>> HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH this is the only reaction I’ll accept

> then falling all over each other is the only thing I’ve ever needed to see

> “ this is not going well” no shit

> my question is why did obi wan not drop Dooku?? Does he actually still care about this man?

> you’re right, I don’t think youre going to be friends 🤦‍♀️😂

> sneaky lying snake

> bruh they don’t even know you’ve got the Jedi captive??????????

>> so how does that work you dumbass

> no shit, you will look like fools obi wan

> “there be some bombad clankers” 😂😂

>> “huh YOURE right, bombad clankers” I love the shock

> YOURE RIGHT HE IS SMARTER THAN HE LOOKS, GIVE JARJAR SOME CREDIT

> oh boy anakin, just keep your mouth shut genius

> man electrocution doesn’t look like fun

> HAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAAH

> The next few lines of confused joy are me reacting to jar jar somehow single handedly taking out 3 tanks

> what the fuck

> JarJar I I’m what-

> JUST DID A GOOD THING, I DONT REGERT THIS THING AT ALLLLLLLL

> fuckin JarJar was great

> “KILL HIM HES NOT A REPRESENTATIVE, HES A PLAGUE” I’m ded 💀😢💀

> serves you right you snake, now dooku gonna choke your ass

> oooohhhhh that’s how these two twits (hondo and obi-wan) became friends

> “and... he knows where you live” Oof the subtle threat is real

> hem I love obi wan very much and his sarcasm

Episode 13: Jedi crash

> I JUST SAW AAYLA I AM EXCITED I AM ALSO ATTRACTED TO HER VERY MUCH

> SHES HOT

> I LOVE HER

> AND HER VOICE JUST MAKES ME ☺️☺️☺️☺️☺️☺️

> I wish I was bly, not gonna lie

> I have a quick question - the 501st colour is blue right? Then why do they have a gold squad, doesn’t the extra colours just confuse things?

> I love seeing anakin and Ahsoka in action coolest thing to watch

> And anakin

>> I am also quite attracted to him

>>> imagine dragging your hands through that hair as he- wait no I have minors in my followers not gonna finish that

> Uh oh

>> Oh anakin you twit

>>> HE LOCKED HOMSELF IN WITH AN EXPLOSION JDGKJDJFKFKFKFKFF

> HES INSANE

> Are all Jedi so reckless? Just the good ones - love this by the way

> Oooohh shit for a STAR

> I mean like? I know anakin doesn’t die, but this shit is concerning

> Perfected the art of destroying ships and getting master almost killed? Sounds familiar

> I hate it when they just call them “padawan “ it just feels very impersonal like bleh

> Like I love aayla but god the Jedi preach some bullshit

>> God forbid someone raises a child and gets attached to it

>>> Like for fucks sake

>>>> Can you tell this is something I’m passionate about?

> Anyway, moving on

> Oh hi anakin! You’re alive!

> That bird lookin thing is tryna eat my boy 😤

> Oop - well that dudes dead

> Aawwwwwww aayla looks so sad, this makes me sad too

> Can we just appreciate this?

> Well these little critters are cute

> Ooooohhh I think I agree with this little dude

> You can skip the paragraph if you like, its just me going off about ‘peacekeeping’

> Alright gonna get mildly into it for a second, the clone wars really gets into it with episodes like this, displaying how the entire galaxy was starting to lose faith in the Jedi and their peacekeeping ways, in the movies we just got that people just started hating the Jedi because they became part of the war, but this really fleshes it out and shows just how slowly and gradually the loss of faith is. Because he’s right, the Jedi aren’t peacekeepers anymore, they bring as much destruction with them that the separatists do and have become symbols of war. They’re fighting for a good reason yes, but they can no longer claim that they are peacekeepers or that they played no role in this war.

> ANYWAY BACK TO REACTS

> AH MY TWO FAVOURITE WOMEN AND A PRETTY BACKGROUND AGAIN!! They really do be doing me a great service

Part 14: Defenders of Peace

> I’m really not into this episode, just saying it now

> Anakins just as bad as obi wan, like honestly just chill bro, fucking REST

>> MY BOYS DESERVE SOME GODDAMN REST AND I WILL DIE ON THIS HILL OK-

> Okay but is it taking a life if it’s a droid?

> Ugh this dudes ugly as fuck

> What did you think was gonna happen?? Of course your village was going to be ransacked

> I could go on forever about the pointlessness of this war like it just makes me mad palpatine you slimy git-

> My reacts this episode are really boring huh, I’m not into it 😭

*fully I didn’t write anything for about 10 minutes here because it’s just a little boring*

> HOLY SHIT NOW THATS A FUCKING WEAPON

> Yep sorry that’s it for this ep, I’m so bored 😂

>> Anyway, bonus episode because that one was short!

Part 15: Trespass

> YES OBIWAN WOHOOOOOOOOOOOOO

> AND IS THAT RIYO CHUCHI I SPY?????

> Hahahahahahahhahahaha it’s not tatooine, you got that right

> Oh god this dude already sounds like a dick (its the chancellor dude but not palpatine)

> Why’s he so defensive over it?

> Oh yikes, that does not look good

> Seppies don’t do that though - this is... odd

> Ah and the same thing has been done to the droids

> Off topic, but I think I’m going to make a clone wars drinking game that I can do while I do my reacts, so I’m going to make that this week, send me your ideas in the comments or dm me!

> Back to ep - pfffffffttt obi wans little taps and then anakin really goes WHACK

> Anyway I’m going to do this in the next couple days and then every Friday night I’ll watch a few eps and drink away

> Alright back to the episode once more

> Abominable snowman????

>> Definitely

> This is gonna go well isn’t it?

> “Well? Say something”

>> “Just shut up” *visible eye roll*

> What the fuck is their mouth

> Okay really obi wan, I think it’s pretty clear they don’t speak basic

> YEEEEEEAAAHHH THATS MY BOI ANAKIN

> Awwwwwwww that shits cute, fucking bear huugggg I want to be hugged like that

> I’m not fussed if it’s anakin, obi wan or kit fisto but please someone love me

>> Preferably kit fisto

> Anyway this dudes a dick (again, its the chancellor dude)

> They obviously have intelligence, and this dude has issues

>> I’m thinking he’s trying to compensate for something 👀

> Oof you really gonna tell a Jedi what to do?

> HAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHA the other people’s were there already

> Ugh he reminds me of my very racist grandparents oh boy

> You’ve been told like 4 times that it is not your jurisdiction anymore and you still can’t take it?

>> BRUH

> She’s so tiny and adorable and her voice is just 🥰🥰🥰🥰

>> Oh no

>>> I’m simping for another character

> Surely this guy dies

> HAHAHAHAHAH HE JUST GOT SPEARED SERVES YOU RIGHT MOTHERFUCKER

> What a dick, he shall not be missed

> She’s just, so pretty??? And smart????

>> FUCK MY BISEXUAL ASS CANT HANDLE THIS

> he’s seriously not dead yet?

> AAAHH RIYO YOU SMART GIRL YEEEEESSSS NEGOTIATE THAT PEEEEAAACCEEEE

> THATS MY GIRL SENATOR CHUCHI YEEEESSS

Welp that’s it for today folks, it was lovely, see y’all at some point this week where I say the drinking game rules and then next drunken Friday (even though these are gonna be released on saturdays but I write them on fridays?)

#the clone wars #tcw #the clone wars reacts #reacts series #star wars ahsoka #anakin skywalker #ahsoka tano #obi wan kenobi #kit fisto #riyo chuchi #jar jar binks #basically a leah simp fest #fucking sigh #it took one (1) ep for me to simp

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chaseatinydream · 4 years

Text

pirate king (extra) || atz

A hand reaches into the frame to press the recording button.

The camera shifts around as the hand moves to adjust it on its tripod, fixing the device in place. When the image finally clears, stills and focuses, the hand moves back to reveal a man with blonde hair done in a mullet.

“Is it done yet?” A voice pipes up in the background.

The man adjusting the camera steps back to reveal a well lit room with wooden floorboards, the words KQ Entertainment behind him in big, white letters. Seven men hover at the back, all trying to push their way into the centre to see the camera.

“It’s on!” The man with the mullet cheers a little at his success. All eight of them rush to form a line, before he announces the beginning of the VLIVE. “하나, 둘, 셋 (hana, dool, seht)!”

“Eight Makes One Team!” They chorus together and bow, wide grins on their faces. “안녕하세요 (annyeonghaseyo)! It’s ATEEZ!”

They burst into a round of scattered applause.

“Hello everyone! It’s Hongjoong here!” The man with the mullet waves at the camera, smiling broadly. “So, due to popular opinion on Tumblr-”

“We’ve decided to check out @chasingatinydream’s fanfiction of us, Pirate King!” The young man with purple hair bursts into the frame, grinning wildly. “We’ve made a reaction video to some of the earlier chapters, which will be uploaded soon! We hope you watch it!”

[atinypiratequeen commented: There is nothing I want more in this life]

“But this video will be about us recreating the legendary post, which made more than half of the readers following Pirate King to curse the author online, Chapter 22, Gunshot! We haven’t read it yet, but we’ll be having one of us narrate as the story goes through!” Hongjoong continues, and everyone cheers, clapping again. ��So now, we’ll be introducing the cast!”

“Hi! It’s Mingi here, main rapper and lead dancer of ATEEZ! I’m going to be the narrator for today!” The tall man waves, holding a script book in hand. His hair is wet, as if he’s just come out of the shower.

[imasexybuffalo commented: omg mingi looks so good]

“Hi, I’m Yeosang, playing myself.” The visual king himself waves, gracing all those who watching with with his presence.

[VLIVE Heart Count has increased by 2k]

[gothyeosanggf commented: im ded some1 save me]

[sassy-kpop-glitter commented: His birthmark is so pretty I wish they wouldn’t cover it! Also this chapter was so sad, this video is probably going to make me cry all over again.]

“Wooyoung here! I’m in charge of the sexy performance of this group and I’m playing Chin Hae, the main character!” Wooyoung waves with a big smile, other hand running through his hair. Hundreds of fangirls’ hearts swell all over the globe at the group’s most epic bias wrecker. “Also the one no one knows shit about!”

[@chasingatinydream commented: I was not expecting this portrayal of my MC but sure go for it Wooyoung]

“I’m Hongjoong, acting as Captain of the Treasure!” Mullet man beams at the camera, inclining his head a little in greeting. Then he glances back at the group. “Wasn’t I supposed to be blind in one eye? Where’s my eyepatch? And my red jacket?”

[@princejoongie1997 commented: I love you Hongjoongie <3]

“Here! Your jacket’s still in the wash because you performed with it yesterday, so the staff said to use this instead.” The man with green hair tosses a small black shape and a red blanket to his leader, before stepping into the camera with a cute smile. “Hello everyone, I missed you all! I’m ATEEZ’s San, director and also in charge of special effects and props!”

[@baeksofty commented: someone save me help help helpppp]

[@chasingatinydream commented: San is directing this wth is going to happen to my story]

“Hi.” Seonghwa smiles sweetly from a chair at the side. He raises the selfie stick he’s holding, waving it a little so everyone can see. “I’m Seonghwa, the oldest, and I’ll be the cameraman for this video!”

[@catmosphericlight commented: is it possible to love one man so much? I feel like its impossible]

[@berrylip commented: my finger hurts from smashing that heart button but i’ll do it for you seonghwa]

“Hi, everyone. It’s ATEEZ’s maknae, Jongho.” The youngest member waves his hand, smiling a little as he watches what’s happening right next to Seonghwa. “I’m going to be the extra who fills in any role needed.”

Hongjoong claps his hands once and everyone falls silent for dramatic effect. Jongho reaches behind the couch to pull someone out from hiding, pushing him right in front of the camera. The tall, lanky man shows itself to be Yunho, trying to crawl back behind the couch.

“And finally, our villain! We present to you, Yunho, AKA Leon Bastiville!”

[@someonerandom commented: LEON BASTARDVILLE!!!]

“You’re already getting hate, Yunho.” San comments as he peers at the comments flooding in from the readers. “Who is this Leon guy anyway?”

“I didn’t want to be a villain! Why did my luck run out on me when I needed it the most?” Yunho wails, attempting to hide from sight. Jongho simply grabs him by the ankle and hauls him back to the front, Yunho’s fingers scrabbling along the floor, before he finally locks his arms around Wooyoung’s leg.

[@mireu01 commented: Yunho as a villain i can’t im wheezing-]

“Sorry, we drew lots for this role.” Seonghwa explains over the noise of Yunho trying to escape from Jongho’s iron grip and Wooyoung attempting to pry Yunho’s hands from his calf as he takes the camera from the tripod, attaching it to the stick. It isn’t working. “Yunho picked the lot for the villain.”

“Alright, I’ll begin reading!” Mingi announces, lifting the script to his face. He starts to read, in the most dramatic tone he can. “Chapter Twenty Two, Gunshot, Original Version. Warnings, whipping, some gore- What? I feel like I shouldn’t be reading this on a VLIVE-”

“It’s a zero budget production, we’ll be fine!” San shouts as he gestures from the sidelines for Mingi to continue. The rapper pauses a little hesitantly, before starting to read once more.

“You freeze. Every muscle in your body goes taut, a cold shiver runs down your spine. The arm around your waist is firm, strong and from the almost unbreakable grip he has on you, he doesn’t intend on letting you go any soon.”

“Wooyoung-ah, Yunho-ah.” San studies the script in his hand intently, before pointing at the taller man, who is still prone on the ground with an arm wrapped around Wooyoung’s leg. “You need to get into position, you know.”

There’s a pause, and the two turn to stare at each other in horror. “What?”

“You heard me.” San waves the script impatiently, pulling a Nerf gun from a small box of props the staff must have given him for this video and tossing it at Yunho, who barely manages to catch the bright yellow toy. “Yunho, stand behind Wooyoung and pretend to choke him.”

Neither of them move, still staring at each other.

[@alyj12 commented: Oh my god just do it please!!!]

“The fans demand it.” Seonghwa’s amused voice can be heard as the camera pans in on Hongjoong’s grin at the sidelines, next to San and Jongho. The maknae is snickering uncontrollably, hand over his mouth.

“You need to do it!” Hongjoong calls. He’s donned the black eye patch already and has the red blanket pulled around his shoulders, the thick fabric so long that it almost completely engulfs him with his head popping out of the very top.

[VLIVE Heart Count has reached 10k]

[@itslizzeh commented: hongjoons such a cute smol bean save me]

[@chasingatinydream commented: why does hongjoong in that blanket remind me of a pimple]

Grudgingly and with no grace at all, Yunho moves behind Wooyoung, grabbing him by the neck and holding the toy gun to his head. The purple haired man makes several gagging sounds and Yunho’s face is one of utter disgust.

“Very good!” San praises as he glances down at the script again. “Now, Yunho, put your mouth at Wooyoungie’s ear.”

“What?” The two of them shout again, Wooyoung struggling to get out of Yunho’s arms while he still can. Yunho’s face is one of nausea as he scrunches up his nose.

“That’s gross, Wooyoung hasn’t showered since dance practice half an hour ago!”

[@atinypiratequeen commented: the two of them literally got the worst roles lmao]

“Do it, do it, do it!” Jongho and Yeosang are chanting in the corner, the maknae not even bothering to hide his laughter now. Yunho slowly puts his face near Wooyoung’s ear and Wooyoung gags.

“I can feel your breath at my ear! It’s weird!”

“It’s weird for me too, damnit!”

“Stop cursing! Now, Yunho, whisper in Wooyoung’s ear ‘I’ve been waiting for you for a long time.’ ”

“I hate this Leon guy, whoever he is!” Yunho yelps as the camera shakes from Seonghwa’s laughter. “Why is he so weird, going around whispering in people’s ears?”

“I don’t know! Someone save me! This main character’s life sucks!” Wooyoung flails around in Yunho’s grip. The tall dancer makes several loud retching noises, but has probably guessed that he won’t be getting out of this anytime soon. He simply closes his eyes for a moment, channeling his inner actor from that video shoot with Dingo, and leans next to Wooyoung’s ear, whispering softly.

“I’ve been waiting for you for a long time.”

Wooyoung screeches like a dying cat. “No!”

[@mireu01 commented: someone get this boy an acting role]

“Very good!” San praises, clapping as he turns to Mingi. The rapper continues reading.

“Your heart sinks in your chest as the rest of your crew come into sight. Most of them are tied up in groups with rope, their heads hanging low as Navy soldiers kick and push them out of the cargo hold, where they had been hidden from sight. So that was why the ship had been so strangely silent when you and Wooyoung had returned to the Treasure. They had been captured- Holy shit, that was what happened to us in chapter twenty one?”

“I don’t know, I was saving myself, I mean the main character, from getting shot from a musket bullet!” Wooyoung wails, thrashing around. “Get me out of here! I regret ever drawing this lot! Who wants to be the main character when she has such a terrible life?”

[VLIVE Heart Count has reached 17k]

“The fans love it!” Seonghwa remarks excitedly, the recording steadying for a moment as he shifts the camera to San, who bows dramatically. Wooyoung shrieks at everyone watching his torment live.

“Yunho, tell Wooyoung ‘Hello, hello, hello, my two dear pirates. Now, we’re finally all here together. I’ve been waiting for this the whole night.’ ”

“That stalker was waiting in wait for us? That’s so creepy.” Jongho comments with a shudder. Yeosang shrugs. He can’t fathom the mind of a lunatic either.

“There’s poison in his voice, sweet as honey and as dangerous as snake venom. You don’t dare to struggle against him for fear of being shot point blank in the head, but his hold on you is making you panic and he’s crushing your windpipe, making every breath an arduous effort.” Mingi reads aloud, and Yunho, getting a little too into character, squeezes Wooyoung’s neck tighter. The shorter dancer yelps, flailing around.

“You’re choking me!”

“Very good, Yunho!” San applauds, completely ignoring Wooyoung’s plight. Yunho grins, nodding at the camera.

“Hey, I’m pretty good at acting!”

[@alyj12 commented: someone save wooyoung he looks like he’s going to die]

“Wooyoung’s fine!” Seonghwa beams, zooming in on Wooyoung’s struggling to free himself.

“You’re killing me!”

“Wow, Wooyoung’s really getting into character. Good job, Wooyoung!” Hongjoong raises a thumbs up with a proud smile on his face.

“I’m not in character-”

“ ‘While the two of you were off causing your little commotion back there at the official’s building,’ the officer drawls, playfully resting his chin on your shoulder as he addresses the crew, ‘one of my men ran back to the harbor to report it to me. My colleague that saw to you yesterday, Yoongi, was already suspicious of you. He smelled gunpowder on your ship, but your little de facto captain told us that you hadn’t been fired on.’ ”

“Are you serious? He smelled us out?” Jongho looks unimpressed by this, scowling. “Who the heck goes around just smelling ships?”

“Bring him out.” Yunho snarls, pressing the toy gun tighter against Wooyoung’s head. His finger must have slipped on the trigger, because there’s a pop sound and Wooyoung yelps, a foam dart falling to the ground.

“That hurt!”

“No, Yunho, he’s not supposed to die yet.” San corrects, shaking his head and completely ignoring Wooyoung. Yunho pouts, breaking character for a moment.

“Sorry.”

“Anyway, Hongjoongie-hyung, it’s your moment to shine!” San announces, turning to his leader. Hongjoong tries to make his way over, but then he steps on the hem of his red blanket and trips, sprawling on the ground in front of the camera. “Oh, that was very good acting, hyung!”

“That wasn’t acting-”

[VLIVE Heart Count has reached 49k]

Mingi glances across the script. “Leon clicks his tongue and you see your captain shoved forward, head bowed and hands bound in front of him. Part of you desperately wants to run to the man who named you, to insist he never incline his head to someone he doesn’t respect, but you are completely powerless now. He looks so small- Doesn’t hyung always look small? What’s the difference?”

“Yah, Mingi!” Hongjoong shouts as he attempts to get up, but trips and falls again. Jongho is snorting uncontrollably, hand reaching for a cup of popcorn that definitely wasn’t there earlier and Yeosang’s face is buried in a pillow as his body shakes with laughter.

“Bring me the cat.” Yunho snaps, getting into the mood once more, and San glances around for his extra.

[@teajuns commenting: yunho really getting into it kshdksj]

“Jongho, you’re going to be the guy that whips Hongjoong-hyung.”

Jongho couldn’t look happier, jumping to his feet at the words, his eyes shining.

“Really?”

Hongjoong’s eyes widen almost comically in horror and he desperately scrambles back. “He’s going to break my back!”

“We don’t have a whip, but we do have a squeaky hammer!” San grins, pulling out the plastic mallet from the box. He tosses it to Jongho, who catches it and eyes it with a vindictive smile Hongjoong’s honestly quite terrified of.

“Don’t worry, hyung. I promise I’ll be gentle.” Jongho looks more terrifying than that Leon guy could ever be. Striding over, he rips the red blanket from Hongjoong, leaving the poor leader on the ground. He raises the squeaky mallet.

The sight is menacing.

“I’m not doing this!” Hongjoong shrieks, running for his life around the dance studio, Jongho chasing after him. Seonghwa documents the whole thing, spinning round and round in circles before he finally retreats the the floor.

“Sorry everyone, I got too dizzy.” He apologises with a laugh.

“Let me go!” The leader screams as Jongho catches him by the legs, sending both of them sprawling to the ground.

“Tell me who broke my guitar string!”

“Never!”

The maknae raises the hammer and mercilessly thwacks his hyung with it, the rubber hammer going squeak squeak squeak.

“Fine, fine, fine! I broke it while trying to play Havana, okay? God, please just stop hitting me! I surrender!”

There’s a final, hard smack and the hammer goes flying out of Jongho’s hands, hitting Wooyoung straight in the face.

[@roamingthesails commented: i can’t stop laughing this is so stupid]

Squeak!

“Ow! I’m not even a part of your scene, Jongho!”

“Hongjoong’s back is a mutilated, bloody mess of raw flesh and shredded skin, crimson streaming from several open wounds. Your captain is on his knees, face pressed against the floor, body trembling.” Mingi baulks a little at the intense description. “You can’t even begin to imagine what absolute agony he must be in, your musket wound was nothing compared to this. But your captain remains silent, teeth gritted against the torment brought on with each swing of the whip. Honestly, you’re so cool in this story, hyung. The last time you got a paper cut you nearly cried and went to Seonghwa-hyung to get a plaster-”

“I didn’t!” Hongjoong groans from the floor, attempting to massage his back. Jongho climbs off him with a triumph grin, settling next to Yeosang.

“Now act like you’re strong and laugh at Yunho, Hongjoong-hyung.” San directs his leader, but the lead rapper simply remains prone on the ground.

“I’m dead, I’m dead…” He moans, lying on the floor like a dead fish. “Just let me die…”

San squirts a bottle of red liquid on his back and Hongjoong screams, leaping off the floor in fright. The back of his shirt looks like a bloody mess. “San, what was that?”

“Ketchup.” The brand is blurred out, but it’s ketchup, alright. “It’s supposed to be your blood.”

“I showered before this…” Hongjoong whines, staring mournfully at his shirt. San ignores him and moves to check his script once more.

[@faith032101 commented: Does this make Hongjoong a snack?]

[VLIVE Heart Count has reached 105k]

“Act evil and tell Hongjoong you’re going to whip Wooyoung too.” He instructs, and Yunho turns to Hongjoong with an evil grin that looks way too into character.

“Let me go!” Wooyoung tries to slip out of Yunho’s arms, but fails spectacularly once again. “I don’t want to get beaten up by Jongho! How is this kind of thing even allowed to be aired-”

“I wonder if your tongue will loosen if I do it to one of your crew, then?”

“I don’t want to die!”

“Now rip Wooyoung’s shirt, Yunho.” San instructs, studying the script. Wooyoung shrieks, doubling his efforts to become Houdini.

“This shirt cost me eighty two thousand won! Don’t do this to meeeee-”

[VLIVE Heart Count has reached 579k]

[@addictmaniac commented: TAKE ONE FOR THE ATINY TEAM AND DO IT YUNHO]

Mingi adds on grimly. “Uncaring of the gun at your head, you flail and thrash against him, to no avail.”

“This shirt was expensive-”

With that, Wooyoung finally breaks free of Yunho’s grip, but the momentum brought on by his little escape sends him stumbling and he trips over Hongjoong’s blanket, before sprawling on top of his leader.

“Ow!”

“Wooyoung, you little-”

“Oh my god Hongjoong’s finally found out Chin Hae is a woman!” Mingi gasps in shock, a hand coming over his mouth. Yeosang gapes in shock.

“Oh no! What’s going to happen? Wooyoung’s going to hate her and they’re never going to be together-”

“Eh, I more of shipped her with captain anyway.” Jongho drawls.

“And he looks so betrayed! Hongjoong, don’t be sad! I promise Chin Hae didn’t want to lie to you-”

“I knew it from the beginning…” Hongjoong groans from under Wooyoung. Mingi ignores him.

“Not you, the cooler Hongjoong in the book.”

“She’s coming back with us. I hope you’re pure for sale, my sweet, but I suppose that may be difficult when you’re on the same ship as so many men- I sound like a pervert, I’m not saying this.” Yunho shakes his head, tossing the script away. It smacks into the camera.

“Ah!” Seonghwa rushes to save it. “Yunho!”

“Hongjoong-hyung, you’re supposed to shout Wooyoung’s name and we get a smoke bomb-”

“But I’m the main character!” Wooyoung protests as he heaves himself off his leader. The front of his shirt is sticky with ketchup, as if he’s the victim of a homicide case.

San pauses to think for a moment. “That’s true. We’ll just move on then. Jongho, smoke bomb please!”

Jongho picks up the cup of popcorn and throws it into the air. It goes absolutely everywhere.

“Great work, Jongho!”

“He flies out of nowhere, lunging for your captor. Leon snarls and tries to kick him away, but then he raises a short knife and buries it in Leon’s arm. The man holding you stumbles back onto the gangplank, falling onto the ground and your saviour takes your hand.” Mingi reads aloud, eyes wide. Then his mouth falls open. “Yeosang, you’re going to-”

[VLIVE Heart Count has reached 1.7M]

“Yeosang the knight in shining armour to the rescue!” Jongho pulls three kazoos from his pockets and blows wildly. The screeching noise almost breaks a few thousand eardrums around the world.

Yeosang stands up, picking his way through the ketchupy, popcorn mess that is the room. He takes Wooyoung’s hand awkwardly.

“Like this?”

“Great! Yunho, pick up the party popper there and shoot Yeosang with it!” San cheers, almost grinning madly. Yeosang’s eyes widen in horror.

“Wait, what-”

Boom!

[@pinkrosesandblackthorns commented: YEOSANG IS DEAD ARGHHHH]

[@sassy-kpop-glitter commented: NO! NO! YEOSANG NEEDS TO LIVE AND BE HAPPY! DON’T BE SO CRUEL YUNHO]

[@ateez-8-makes-1-team commented: HOW COULD YOU DO THIS YUNHO]

“I didn’t do it on purpose!” Yunho yelps, dropping the confetti gun.

Yeosang slumps to the ground, groaning. “That hurt…”

“Join the club.” Hongjoong mutters, a few inches next to him and completely spent.

“Wooyoung, go and shake his body and cry.” San whirls around dramatically, tossing his script into the air.

Wooyoung finally decides to try his hand at acting and sinks to his knees next to Yeosang. San shakes another red bottle on the two of them. “NAORIIIII!”

“No, that movie is Goblin, Wooyoung-”

“What is this ketchup? It’s burning my skin!” Wooyoung shrieks and San double checks the bottle, face turning a little pale.

“Oh. It was chilli.”

There’s a moment of silence as Yeosang and Wooyoung both stare at each other. Then they’re bolting for the door in horror, dashing from the dance studio while tripping over their own feet.

San follows, calling after them.

“Need any help, guys?”

“I’m a terrible person. I’m a terrible cruel, cold hearted man who just killed Yeosang with a confetti gun.” Yunho is mumbling to himself. Mingi pats him on the back, pushing him out of the door as well.

“Maybe you should get some rest, hyung. I hear the author has some pretty nasty stuff planned for you after the Sea Witch arc…”

[@chasingatinydream commented: STOP SPOILING THE STORY MINGI]

The two vanish out of the door.

“I’m going to take a shower and see a doctor.” Hongjoong groans, dragging himself after them. The door clicks shut behind him.

The camera turns around to fit Seonghwa’s unruffled face into the frame.

“Well, that was Pirate King, chapter 22, gunshot. Roll credits.” He shows the floor, the scene of a massacre with popcorn scattered everywhere. “I suppose this is just a good opportunity for cleaning up, hmm?”

[VLIVE Heart Count has reached 3.6M]

The next thirty minutes of the VLIVE are of Seonghwa’s Cleaning ASMR.

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