#that i avoided having any experiences at all

[jellybeanium124]

if you'll allow me to flaunt my psych minor for a second, I'd like to talk about epigenetics. there's studies that show that if you shock a rat when you let them taste a certain flavor, they will immediately become averse to that flavor. not surprising. what is surprising is that the rat's grandchildren, who have never been shocked when given that flavor, will also be averse to it and afraid of it and avoid it. there's also correlational evidence to suggest that the descendants of people who suffered through famine are more likely to put on weight and keep it on easier, even if they have never been through a famine themself.

trauma gets passed down. the kinds of trauma your parents, grandparents, and so-on lived through is still living in you. even if your parents were the most well-off, loving, best parents in the world, their trauma is still in you.

now if you'll allow me to take a slight turn here: there's a wild rabbit inside every jew.

my dad grew up being called "jew-boy." my mother had a coworker throw pennies at her at her job in the 2010s. and that's just two examples. they both grew up being harassed for being jewish. I wasn't. I'm incredibly lucky. the amount of antisemitism I've experienced in real life has been incredibly minimal. I didn't even hear anyone make an antisemitic joke in front of me until college.

and none of us were seriously persecuted. none of my grandparents were seriously persecuted. but even though nobody's broken my windows, nobody's beaten me in the streets, and I haven't been at any of those horrible protests in person, the fear is there. this deep seated, blood-pumping fear of the ancient jewish rabbit in me telling me to run. to run for dear life, to run as far as my legs can get me, as long as my heart keeps pumping and my lungs keep breathing.

we all feel this.

everyone feels this.

I called my mother yesterday. when I brought up this feeling she paused, and the silence said everything. she told me I wasn't alone. she feels it. my dad feels it. my brother feels it. my nana and grampa feel it. every jew you know, online, in real life, hell, even the famous ones, they feel it. the rabbit is inside us all, and the rabbit knows, because its brothers who didn't flee in the past were slaughtered.

the rabbit is leaping around my chest, all of our chests, chanting run run run run run run run.

I don't know if I can explain it to gentiles. I don't know if this makes sense to you. I don't know how to get across how crystal clear and deep and primal this fear is, and how much all of us are feeling the exact same fear, despite our different lives and different histories and the fact we're different people.

part of me wishes it didn't matter. that I didn't feel like I needed to get goyim to understand my specific cultural and ethnic experiences. because I don't feel like I need to deeply understand everyone else's. I am a white passing ashkenazi american jew, and I will never fully understand what it is like to be anything else. that doesn't dissolve my responsibility to educate myself and practice empathy, but it's ok. idk, maybe other people do desperately wish they could get people not in their specific group to deeply understand what it's like to be them. I imagine that feeling is universal. I guess, it's just like, the left is unified that everyone is a person, everyone is equal, everyone is human, except the jews. nobody is left out but the jews. everyone's word is believed, but the jews. and it makes me feel like I have to beg and plead with people to understand what being jewish means, because we're not included with everyone else. we're the enemy. and I want people to see we're not the enemy.

epigenetics.

[words-and-threads]

I'm not going to say this doesn't happen in progressive spaces (and reactionaries pretending to be progressive while repackaging right wing talking points....) Also, I think its prevalence is magnified by A. Alt right fear-mongering, B. The way our media landscape carries the loudest and most clickable voices rather than the most common, and C. The vein of gender essentialism running through plain old mainstream society classic to which nobody is immune.

Obviously I don't know a stranger's life. If all the leftists you've met think the SCUM manifesto is the height of political commentary then yikes I am very sorry you've had that experience.

On a more general level, the idea that men are dumb violent animals was just as common in 90s tv as it is in leftist spaces. It's not progressive or controversial. Of course, action movies and ads frame it as either good or at worst an inevitable struggle. In fact the alt right LOVE this idea of masculinity, of raising their sons to be "monsters." This idea was not born on the left or the fringe. It's everywhere.

Combine that with the nebulous nature of any movement as large as "the left" (a nearly meaningless term considering how broad it is) and yeah, you're gonna see a lot of garbage takes. I mean shit, there are plenty of misogynist self-proclaimed leftists. If you wanted to drop back into that echo chamber without the alt right you totally could.

Even if you narrowed to feminists: Andrea Dworkin vs. Bell Hooks. Capitalist vs. Socialist feminists. A century of debate about intersectionality. There is no consensus. There will always be bad takes. And there are lots of leftists and feminists who are trying to unpack that gender essentialism. Many are in the comments on this post. If all you hear from leftists is hate, FIND BETTER LEFTISTS. I have seen a lot of them. I have met a lot of feminist men with wives and girlfriends and female friends who would fight god for them. I do actually want a better world for men, too, which is why I have done a lot of that unpacking and I haven't stopped.

As for fighting for the rights of people who hate you....yeah man. We all have to do that. If I'm against the exploitation of workers, that has to include the ones who would happily beat me to death. Ideological consistency is hard.

Edit on the topic of the original post which we've kind of gotten away from: actual OP you are very right. Part of the issue is the simple fact that since the right is more friendly to capitalism they're going to get more support from the wealthy. Part of it is the simplicity of right wing talking points. Sure they're bullshit, but they're easy to spread and digest and they ask very little of you. Basically the mcdonalds of ideas. And when everyone is stressed and exhausted that big mac looks pretty good. Again this dovetails nicely with employers pushing and stretching us all to exhaustion. For real fuck capitalism.

Buuut to avoid going complete doomer, I do think there are strategies activists could make more use of. Mostly we need to relearn how to use stories and emotion. NOT to lie, but to paint a more hopeful picture of our goals and to focus on those goals when doing outreach rather than just on the problems. I want men to be happy, healthy, and fulfilled. I want everyone to have freedom in their relationship to gender. I want food and shelter for everyone yes everyone yes even that guy.

We also need to push back on the idea that those goals are impossible or unrealistic. We went to fucking space but we can't establish UBI? Why? No seriously, when we encounter reactionary arguments we have to demand they justify their existence first. Push. Give no quarter. Calling right wing creeps weird was a good start because their assertion that everyone agrees with them was tissue thin. Often it only takes one or two people looking at the guy who just said something utterly fucked and going "bro...what?" We need to have confidence in our arguments and stop apologizing or preemptively pulling back. We can't keep saying how unpopular and hard to believe we are and then be surprised when people agree.

I couldn't have said it better myself.

[letters-to-lgbt-kids]

Are you pro-life or pro-choice?

I fear my answer might piss off both sides here but: I’m neither. 

The whole “pro life” vs. “pro choice” framing suggests that abortion is a topic to form an opinion based on personal feelings on. But I refuse to have an opinion on a healthcare procedure. That decision is between the person affected and their doctor. I do not get to have an opinion on it.

I can say I am against a complete ban on abortion - because it is a healthcare procedure. Criminalizing it could kill a person who needs a lifesaving medical intervention. Criminalizing it could also mean that a person who is going through a heartbreaking, even traumatic experience is now treated as a criminal offender on top of that (and that experience wouldn’t even have to be an abortion, it could even be someone going through a miscarriage, an ectopic pregnancy or a molar pregnancy).  

Arguments against abortion too often read as „We should ban breast cancer treatment because breast cancer is bad“. That’s just not how the world works. That would kill people. Breast cancer will not stop existing if we stop treating it. Situations where it’s best to end a pregnancy will not stop existing if we ban abortion.

I can also say I am for reducing the need for abortion - not by banning or criminalizing it, but by providing comprehensive sexual education from an early age, by providing easy access to all contraception options, by making sure everyone can financially afford the contraception option that fits them best, by providing more financial assistance to pregnant people, by supporting single parents, and so on. 

I’m not a big fan of being told to bend over backwards to avoid calling an unborn baby a baby. Using medical terminology (like embryo) is one thing, but calling it a “clump of cells” or a “tumor” is incredibly disrespectful to people grieving a pregnancy loss. It also sends the wrong message. We shouldn’t have to act like abortion is a happy choice, just to convince people that people with a uterus may also need healthcare. Abortion is a hard decision. Unfortunately, healthcare includes making hard decisions. 

Most breast cancers need to be treated and some pregnancies need to be terminated, and neither of that should be based on my feelings. I’m not the center of the universe. I don’t get to give any input there or say in which cases it’s necessary or not - unless I was the person affected or the doctor advising them. 

[derinthescarletpescatarian]

Hi,

There's a stray cat (very friendly, no collar or anything) wandering our street and he's very skinny so we were thinking of trying to put out food for him and hopefully in a couple months take him in (or at least bring him to a vet to be neutered and released if not).

I was wondering if you had any advice / stuff to watch out for from your experience taking care of Diesel?

Not really. Cats that are socialised young enough are generally pretty easy to bribe with food over time, in my experience; if he's friendly, he should fall in love with you pretty quickly. (Cats that are unsocialised young will very occasionally socialise themselves but are almost always a waste of time, but it sounds like he's been socialised so you shouldn't have problems).

Don't touch him before he wants you to unless there's some kind of emergency (in which case, use a cat trap, but if there's no emergency don't bother); that's a great way to make him wary of you and also get bitten by his horrible plague mouth (cat bites are very prone to infection). Cats are generally easy beasts to deal with if you respect their autonomy and their personal space.

If he's outside and starving, he might have various fleas, internal parasites, and other minor but treatable health problems. Cats are particularly prone to a variety of worms, as well as eye infections. Your vet will tell you how to deal with these, and explain to you how to give him a dewormer and bathe him if he needs bathing (most cats don't ever need bathing, but if he's young and filthy he might need one when you take him in.)

Most socialised cats like to sleep inside where it is safe and warm, so if you feed him for a bit then there's a really good chance that you can just open the door one day and let him into your house. This is especially likely if he's lived in a house before. Some socialised cats who have secure lodgings already in some drainpipe or basement or something will avoid this, but in the vast majority of cases a friendly cat will happily just come inside. So you shouldn't have any trouble "catching" him, unless you have other cats or dogs in there that he might want to avoid.

The one thing that I would warn of is that most outdoor cats I've dealt with have had some level of PTSD. When Diesel started hanging out with me I had to watch him carefully to learn what sorts of things would make him panic (sudden movements or approaching him from specific angles, touching him when he is asleep), and what sorts of things triggered his hypervigilance and put him on high alert. The triggers are different for different cats; some hate enclosed spaces or heights (things that most cats love), or won't eat without somebody standing guard, or need to be able to see the door to the room at all times. These quirks are generally not hard to deal with; just don't do stuff to your cat that upsets them (unless you have to, like for medical reasons) and you'll be fine.

If you want information on anything complicated that shows up with him (unlikely; cats are generally very easy beasts to deal with), there's a wealth of great information from cat fosterers and rescuers on youtube.

[certifiedsexed]

Is it possible to be afraid of vaginal penetration? I never experiment with mastutbation in that way and even afraid of tampons

It's possible to be afraid of anything! And common ways that can affect you are like what you mentioned.

Avoiding tampons, avoiding vaginal penetration during sex, etc. That's all actually very common for people afraid of vaginal penetration!

Hope this helps, let me know if you have any other questions. <3

[ttaibhse]

do you support trans people?

let's just assume youre asking this in good faith despite this being an extremely vague question that doesn't really ask anything specific lol. so i'll give you answers to a few different interpretations of it and you can let me know if i've missed any that you're especially concerned about 👍

oh and bear in mind the context that i have transitioned medically and lived as both stealth ftm and openly trans/nonbinary and have experienced being trans first person 🙏

do i support trans people's right to live safe and happy lives free from harrassment and discrimination? yes, of course

do i support trans people's right to present themselves however they want to? yes, of course

do i use the correct names and pronouns of trans people that i interact with in real life? of course!

do i believe people when they tell me their gender identity? sure. i have experienced gender dysphoria lol. i get it

do i support trans people's right to good healthcare? yes of course

do i support adult's decisions to transition medically? if they have ACTUAL full informed consent, sure. many many MANY people are not being provided with FULL, INFORMED consent before opting for medical transition. this is not their fault.

do i think it's irresponsible and stupid to tout medical transition as a risk free, reversible, totally harmless way to experiment with gender? yes

do i think any of this should mean that women should scrupulously monitor their language and behaviour at all times to make sure that no one might possibly feel excluded or offended by anything at all? no

am i personally going to walk on eggshells with the language i use to avoid being called names online when anyone with a working brain knows exactly what i'm talking about? no

am i going to police my own presence online to make sure i'm not interacting even remotely with any bloggers who might have different or even distasteful beliefs or opinions to my own? no

do i think the existence of people with gender dysphoria and people who choose to reject binary gender labels and/or whatever other interpretations you might have of any variety of trans identities means that biological sex is suddenly somehow irrelevant and should be ignored? no

do i think that ANYONE AT ALL AT ANY TIME, regardless of identity, has the right to sexual access to women's bodies? no

do i think that any woman should be obliged to date or have sex with anyone she doesn't want to date or have sex with, for any reason at all, including to make that person feel validated? no

do i think that trans women face the same struggles and experiences with misogyny as cis women? no

do i think that you're being wilfully stupid if you claim these two groups of people are indistinguishable? yes

do i think women should have to prioritise the feelings and sensibilities of any other group, even marginalised groups, over their own safety in the face of being raped/forcefully impregnated/abused/killed by men? no <3

anon as ive said before, you're welcome to make your own decisions about me based on these answers & the content of my blog. you can ask me more questions if you want. but i'm not going to give any black and white sweeping statement answers to appease random anonymous tumblr users and i'm not going to pretend i don't see, experience, and understand material reality. i'm not going to pretend that women aren't my priority lol. i'm not going to pretend that i care that much about being careful to use inclusive language instead of just saying "women" and "men". if that's your priority then that's great for you but it's not mine and it doesn't have to be lol

[kaeyalovr]

Yandere Kaeya x reader drabble

idk I'm really bored it's 3AM and I wanted to post something. Not proofread sorry for any mistakes!!

tw. kidnapping, non-con, kaeya being a bit creepy but it's okay we love him

1,5k words

You've just been hired as one of Jean's many assistants. The pay could be better but it's enough to get by and hey, it's not like you have the right to be super picky about it, this is one of your first jobs so you have pretty much no prior experience becides some freelance gigs here and there.

You were initially very happy with the fact that you were going to get to assist the acting grand master and actually help mondstadt directly. Having wild dreams of being Jean's right hand woman, ready to be at her beck and call, being a part of important meetings giving insightful advice, you know, making mondstadt a better place.

Boy were you in for a rude awakening when you realized all you got to actually do was boring paperwork all day long. Just. Paperwork. Oh and sometimes if it was a really exciting day, you got to deliver a letter or two!

So obviously when the flirtatious cavalry captain started chatting with you by your desk every now and then, you appreciated it. It was just mindless small talk; "how has your day been?" "do you want a cup of coffee?" "the weather's nice today", but nonetheless you enjoyed it. It was a nice distraction in the middle of a boring day filled with piles and piles of documents. You even started looking forward to having him stop by your desk.

Little did you know how much he enjoyed it too. Honestly you didn't know why he had taken such an interest in you, he didn't seem to talk to the other office workers this much. Well he didn't seem to talk to them at all.

Your talks got more and more frequent, which you didn't mind, until they started interfering with your work. At the start he would stay for maybe five minutes, but it gradually got longer and longer, eventually he started lingering for what seemed like forever, talking about the most monotonous things. If you tried to do your work while he was talking, he would stop you and in a playful tone call you rude for not giving him your full attention. Honestly, if you, a simple office worker, was falling behind on your work because of this how did he, a cavalry CAPTAIN, find the time for these conversations? Did he seriously not have work of his own to attend to?

Then he started to get weird. First, quick glances at your lips or breasts, then his and your hands started "accidentally" brushing against each other and then a frequent hand on your shoulder or hip. You started getting uncomfortable. Did he always stand so close to you? Did he always keep his hand motionless on your thigh? Did he always call you by a cringy petname?

After a few weeks of this you decided to leave, he was a captain for archons sake, you couldn't avoid him. Especially not when you were couped up in one place for practically the whole day. Whatever, you got a new job in a local antique shop. At least this job would be more suited to your tastes and let you strech your legs a bit more. Plus there would be no creepy blue haired man to disturb you anymore.

You worked a full day in your old office before you were given permission to pack up your desk and leave. Jean really wanted to get every mora's worth out of you huh. The sun was setting below the horizon now, some nice scenery while you pack your things. Your multicolored pens which you only used once, a photo of you and your family and a mug gifted to you by an old friend. The office was almost empty at this point, except for a couple late night stragglers too focused on their work to notice anything anyway. You lasted a total of two months here, a bit pathetic but it's okay, now you know you're not cut out for the office life.

You're done packing relatively quickly since you didn't have much stuff there. As your desk was so small and overflowing with papers so there wasn't much space to have personal belongings stored anywhere. You're about to head out the door when a familiar voice stops you in your tracks, Kaeya. You exchange pleasantries and tell him you're packing up to leave. He seems shocked at that and asks why you're leaving, you give him some excuse about how you got a better paying job somewhere else. Definitely not because of you, you muse to yourself. Though the former reasoning is not entirely untruthful.

He says it's dark and offers to walk you home, you know, for safety. He's right and you didn't mind a 20 minute walk with him if it meant you never had to see him again. If only you'd been a little smarter.

While walking with Kaeya you engage in your usual smalltalk, though his voice is lower than usual. He's walking behind you all calm and nonchalant, and it's giving you the creeps even though you know it shouldn't, you rationalize his behaviors as him being tired after a long day of work. You try to walk a bit more briskly than usual to get to your house faster. You're renting out a room in a nice old lady's house.

You two are walking in a particularly dark and empty alleyway when you suddenly feel a hand clamp over your mouth. Panicked you look back and catch a glimpse of an ever unfazed Kaeya being the perpetrator of this act. His other arm wraps around your neck and crushes your windpipe. You struggle in his arms, your strength being no match for his, he easily overpowers you and keeps you firm in his grasp. You thrash a bit more before everything turns black.

You wake up in a foreign king-size bed with cold silky sheets. You lift your hand up to rub at your eyes but notice the leather belt binding both your hands to the headboard. You get increasinly panicked and memories of the night before come flodding back. You start to thrash and open your mouth to scream when the bedroom door opens.

In walks the blue haired prick who did this to you. You hurl every insult you can think of at him and demand he lets you go. He merely chuckles and asks why he would do that. You threaten to scream, he threatens to gag you, you stay silent. You start to get desperate and once you finally accept that the leather restraints won't budge, you plead with him, promise to not tell anyone about what he did. He simply retorts that even if you did miraculously escape and tell someone, no one would believe you.

He walks toward the bed and you try to rationalize the situation you're in right now. Why did he choose you and what does he even want to do with you? Does he intend to hold you for ransom? No, he's a decorated captain with presumably plenty of riches. Does he want some top secret information from you? He starts to unbuckle his pants. Oh. THAT'S what he wants.

Whoa, whoa, whoa. Your heart starts racing as you understand the severity of the predicament you're in right now. He climbs onto the bed, on top of you. This has to be a nightmare or some fucked up prank right? He pulls down your pants and let's out a wolf whistle. That fucking bastard. Next goes your panties and he rolls up your shirt, unable to pull it off completely because of your bound hands. Your breathing quickens. You beg him to stop. He doesn't.

He pulls down his boxers, you close your eyes tight and start hyperventilating. "Don't cry sweetheart, it's okay. Fuck you're so hot when you cry. Hey, look at me." He lightly slaps your face a few times. You reluctantly open your eyes and unintentionally glance down. He's fucking massive. Well not like the biggest dick in Teyvat but it's gotta be up there on the list man. Not that you've had a lot of experience to know what's big and what's not. Well none really. But you know for a fact that THAT is not gonna fit inside you, and you don't want it to.

He leans down and starts getting into position. You get a surge of adrenaline and start to thrash and struggle with all your might. Kaeya gets annoyed at that, grabs your legs and tells you to stop struggling and mumbles something about how it'll be easier for the both of you. You don't really care what he says and kick him straight in the stomach. You know it didn't do any real damage to him but it stops him for a minute. He's pissed.

"You know, I tried to do this the nice way. But you just love to make it difficult and act like a brat all the fucking time don't you. Not to worry, we have the whole day to fuck that out of you." Is the last thing you hear before he spears into you.

grrrr I left so much out but I gtg to sleep (also rushed ending sorry). Might make this into a fic if I feel like it and you guys want it😝 reqs are open btw

[alexafaie-asd]

I finished university in the UK in 2008. I had studied archaeology.

Thing about archaeology in the UK is that the paid work only happens as a result of developments going on. Building projects no longer happening? Then you don't need to pay for an archaeological unit to survey your site to determine if there's anything of historical significance to avoid or investigate before work can start (or if it can ever start).

So its a bit of a canary in the coalmine of jobs because you get those jobs months/years before they'd actually be breaking ground on their building project anyway. It all happens in the planning stages. So like there were practically zero new jobs showing up for new archaeologists. Didn't have a 1st degree, just a 2:1 (second best)? You didn't get one of those very few jobs.

So ok, you go look for a regular mundane job. Just anything, doesn't need to relate to your expertise. Just anything. Except there was one point when I was at the job centre doing my mandatory search of their database for a suitable part time job (I was new to working & would've struggled to do full time) and there were 3 job listings for the whole city. Not sorted into categories, so maybe I was being too specific just 3 total. One of which required a HGV license and you can't get that until having had a regular license for years and I didn't even have a provisional licence. I had to show the person I was seeing that there weren't enough jobs to apply to because you were expected to apply to a certain number to keep getting jobseekers allowance. I tried applying elsewhere but nowhere was hiring.

We're talking a largish city too. One which is well known enough that if I mentioned it by name, Americans will likely have heard of it. Even saying that likely narrows it down lol. But like the job advisor was trying to get me to apply to the job that needed the HGV license (even though they knew I couldn't drive) saying desperately "well maybe they'll make an exception" and I'm like sure, maybe they will let me drive a heavy goods vehicle with zero driving experience of any kind.... are they hiring here? I'm sure I could give better advice than that.

And funnily enough a year later they *were* hiring for more jobseeker advisors because there were so many people out of work looking for jobs they were shortstaffed! So you could get a job just to tell lots of other people that there are no jobs other than trying to help people find jobs! It was quite frankly madness.

The "um but the economy actually *isn't* that good" argument is a prime example of what the fuck is wrong - people are deliberately ignoring the majority of the facts to focus on one element and act like that completely negates the rest.

[shepherds-of-haven]

hey, this is the anon who sent in the ask about loving the idea of a red - mc - briony triangle lol! you asked what i'm intrigued by so here it is (sorry if i'm butchering your characters with this, maybe it only works with my own mc and the vibes in my head)

it's a couple different things. first, i feel like the safety of that relationship would be unbelievable. the trust and genuine love would be insane. red and briony are both such compassionate and empathetic people and in that triad any one of them would have a soft place to land with the other two. so many steadying conversations and so much quiet comfort when it's needed, distractions (especially from briony lol) from difficult feelings or situations when it's needed. just the idea that, as fun and lighthearted as that relationship would be, there's always that undercurrent of deep deep understanding and unconditional space held. yeah

and god that relationship just seems like it Would be so fun and they would all so obviously adore each other....it could get to the point of being almost annoying for the other shepherds if it wasn't also so sweet lol. can't imagine them trying to rub it in anyone's faces at all but it would be SO heartbreaking for all those secret admirers to watch briony light up at the sight of red or mc and go bounding off to them across the courtyard, or to hear the way red can't seem to finish an entire thought out loud without managing to work some aside about one or both of mc and briony into it. (feeling like the relationship gets completely outed when a recruit heading down to the kitchens for a snack in the early morning catches briony and red coming out of mc's room. at the same time.)

i also think i just love the sort of natural push and pull that relationship would probably have to involve??? you've got briony there as a force for justice and assertiveness when it's necessary, when red tries valiantly to make conversation work in a situation where it simply won't, or when mc allows an insult to slide for the sake of maintaining professionalism. but red (and mc, depending on who exactly they are lmao) would also be able to curb the worst excesses of that and make sure she doesn't tip over into recklessness. and then briony and mc could immediately help pump the brakes on the more self-destructive tendencies red has, especially when it comes to his research- there are two people there who are perceptive enough to know whether or not he's eating, who can persuade him to come to bed instead of falling asleep at his desk (and who put blankets over his shoulders and pillows under his head on the nights he doesn't quite make it there). and of course, bigger picture, briony and mc (at least mien lol) would be knowledagble enough about magic and concerned enough about red's experiments w the worldwalkers to keep an eye out and who would notice, intervene, and have a serious conversation with him if his drive started to go down a dark or dangerous path. mc's trickier lol but at least in my little world with my mc, he really trusts both of them with some of his most private thoughts re: his fear of what's coming and his worries about failure, letting everyone down up to and including the gods, his past, etc.- they're people who are steadfastly loyal, and for mcs who would need space to talk about their anxieties they seem like they would be so safe, willing to challenge things that don't sound right or border on self-sacrificial but also gentle when they do it....i just think they would all bring out the best in each other, while also helping each other avoid the pitfalls of the most passionate (but consuming) parts of themselves. the stuff that's good in moderation but can get scary when it's too far

i could actually write a dissertation on this lmao i started typing and just kept realizing i had more to say. thank you SO SO MUCH for characters that are this fascinating and fun to imagine lol, i hope this wasn’t too much!!

Ahhhh thanks so much for sharing!!! I absolutely love reading thoughts like this, I think you're absolutely spot on with the characters and how a poly relationship between them would go! :) This was lovely, thanks so much for the fun read! 💖

[magicaldreamfox1]

ahaha do u guys everrrrr spend ur whole life hiding who u really are and what u're interested in only to then realise one day that u don't even know how to be urself

[le-higuu]

Transcription below the Read More:

Stan: wakes up disoriented, then jolts upright after realizing where he is.

Ford: "mm... Stanley?— Oh! Are you back?"

Stan: "...Yeah. I'm back."

Ford: "Do you... Remember what happened?"

Stan: "...Yeah. I..."

Stan: "I was actin' pretty weird, huh?"

Ford: "Well, sure, but you know me— weird is my specialty."

Stan: "Yeah, yeah, yuck it up."

Ford: "So, what is it like? Do you retain your adult memories? Fiddleford thought you might not, but you knew who he was, so I disagreed."

Stan: "Wow. You uh. Sure have a lot of questions. Never change, Six."

Fiddleford: I heard y'all yappin'. You back, Stan?"

Stan: "...Yeah."

Fiddleford: "Oh, good."

Ford: "So, which one of us was right?"

Fiddleford: "I ain't so sure he wants to talk about that Ford."

Ford: "Ah? Why's that?"

Fiddleford: "Well, I certainly don't wanna talk about my... episodes."

Ford: "But this is different, Fiddleford! There's so much we don't know!"

Fiddleford: "Well it ain't our business to know."

Ford: "Of course it is, I'm his brother."

Fiddleford: "Well I ain't —"

Stan: shouting, "Would'ya both shut your yaps!?"

Stan: "Look, it's just a weird thing that happens sometimes. We all had our laughs, now let's forget it. Okay?"

Ford: "...What do you mean, 'happens sometimes'?"

Fiddleford: "Ford!"

Ford: "What? This is important context!"

Stan: "HAH! Did I say that? I meant that— it— uh— happens to people. In general."

Ford: deadpan, "I have literally never experienced that before in my life."

Stan: "Well— duh— Y— YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN!"

Fiddleford: "Well, Stan, if this were a reoccurring phenomenon, it'd help to know what might trigger it so we can avoid it in the future. Y'know— so you don't have to experience that again."

Stan: "...Right. Experience... That."

Ford: pauses for a second. "...Was it really so bad?"

Stan: "What?"

Ford: "Look, I know it's silly, and childish, and I was worried at first, but... Being able to just... pretend, for a while. Go back to when we were kids and things were so... simple."

Ford: "... I didn't hate it."

Stan: pauses for a second. "... I didn't hate it either."

Ford: "What's it like?"

Stan: collects his thoughts. "It's like... My brain just kinda goes into a fog, and I can't... think adult things? It's kinda fun sometimes, even. If I find a toy or a game to play. Sometimes it, uh... Wasn't."

Ford: "But it's not harmful to you in any way?"

Stan: "I mean... not as far as I can tell?"

Ford: "Then I see no reason for us to be concerned!"

Fiddleford: "But Ford, what if it happens while he's alone?"

Ford: "...Ah."

Stan: "Hey, don't worry about me. I've been fine on my own so far, right? Take it easy."

Ford: "But ... you haven't."

Ford: "The entire reason this happens is because you were alone for so long. And I don't want you to be just fine. Besides, it's.. partially my fault. The least I can do is support you."

Stan: "...So that's it, then?"

Ford: "What?"

Stan: "So, the only reason ya went along with this— did any of this—"

Fiddleford: "Hey, now.."

Stan: "Was because ya felt guilty? It wasn't even your fault!"

Ford: "Of course not, I—"

Stan: "Quit lyin' to me!"

Ford: "I'M NOT!"

Stan: "Yes you are! You think this is some sick science experiment, don't you?? Well, I'm not—!"

Ford: "I MISSED YOU TOO!!" Ford is hugging himself.

Ford: "I... I missed being your brother. And this— being able to laugh with you, and play, and tell stories... It was good! I... I missed that."

Stan: "... I missed it too. Ok? Why d'you think it even happens in the first place? I'm not dumb. But we can't really go back. No matter how much we want to."

Ford: "Why not?"

Ford: "Why can't we act like kids again? Don't we deserve to have that back? After everything? After everything this evil fucking world has taken from us... Don't we deserve to get something back for once?"

Stan: sniffs. "....maybe."

Ford: "Then let's figure this out. Together."

Stan: "... Wherever we go."

The brothers hug each other.

Fiddleford: thinking to himself, "Thank God they made up."

your age regressed Stan has interested me, would you be willing to do more?

very well <3

[blueskittlesart]

Feel free to ignore this but as someone who also goes to art school, I find it really interesting how other art schools also have a “don’t date your peers” sort of faux pa. Like so many people I know (including me) refuse to date anyone else who goes to my college 😭

I wonder why that is tbh, small school thing maybe?

being so serious i didn't have anything against dating other art school peers when i first came here and i think most freshmen dont but once you have one or two art school relationships under your belt you realize why all the upperclassmen avoid dating each other like the plague

[catstar91]

Ok phandom peeps, I need to get something off my chest. I cannot stop thinking about it, it’s so funny that this happened to me!

So I’ve been casually perusing the DP fandom for a while, right? Like for several years at least! What can I say? I like art! So at various points I had talked to my aunt about some stuff related, like fun stuff about the phandom and the existence of ghost king aus and stuff. Recently though, I found a fanfic that I spent AN ENTIRE DAY reading and doing nothing else! Like I stayed up late the night before, woke up to immediately read more! I don’t normally read fanfics, let alone any long form story, cuz my attention span is shit and has been shit basically all my life! So in the evening when I was a good chunk of the way through the fic, I talked to my aunt about it! Cuz it’s funny! I found a lot of things in it very amusing and wanted to share!

And then she asked for a link…

The next thing I know, within a few months, probably 3 months later at most, my aunt starts telling me about phandom lore I had never even heard of before! She literally made an ao3 account!!! Guys I am floored! I’ve been idly watching from the shadows for so long, and then I accidentally get my aunt into the phandom and she starts telling me about a red duck candle that’s apparently been integral DPxDC lore for YEARS!

What have I DONE???

[featherymainffins]

Peace and love on planet Earth but if I see one more post NOT about recovery and, in fact, encouraging eating disorders in the ed recovery tag, I might just turn into a chimpanzee and tear everyone's faces off.

[emceewhytea]

First of all i love your approach to discourse and analysis. It is always a joy to read and you are very kind in your judgements which i feel should be an innate thing (most if not all people don’t act maliciously on purpose) and your knowledge + willingness to understand is an inspiring mindset. I don’t even disagree with anything. I think your canon vs. art is a really good example of aesthetical bias towards pink and european skin undertones.

I’m going to sound insane or a little weird i suppose. But to me, even though Joel’s skin tone does resemble a corpse-like colour, i always attributed it to something much more olive like you would find on an East Asian or Middle Eastern individual. To me, its a skin tone I’d be able to pinpoint on my friends and family. It wouldn’t be an exact match but then again the person who made the original Joel skin seems to have shaded with black or neutral darks as if he were in a fluorescent room. But the base color itself is not that strange to me.

I can’t really bring up my point without the controversy around scar and bdubs (and skizz?). i highly doubt their cc put the skin on thinking that their cubito was going to be of someone with a much darker skintone than them (instead of just a representative of their own persons) and therefore be able to undergo white washing or colourism in fanart. in fact i would argue their cubito’s base color is washed out and very ashen, something you should often avoid when coloring darker skin tones that are usually rich in color of blues, reds, and even yellow. The ashen complexion is also something Joel’s skin is a victim of.

Color picking the part of his face that would be subjected to the least amount of shading, it doesn’t surprise me that people tend to white wash him in art. Especially if you take this color and decide to lean towards the pinker side of things. And that’s when ignoring the influence the actual skintone of the cc (white person) usually has on someone’s interpretation of their cubito character.

So its a little odd to me that Joel does not get the same outcry that bdubs and scar do when they color him with a lack of olive undertones. Even though the amount of yellow on Joel’s skin borders on caricature, i still found it really apparent that its still there. And so it makes me think that another unspoken bias is at play, a mentality that its okay to perhaps erase or change olive yellow undertones because they are unattractive, or if you’re uncareful, resemble Asian characteritures. But i think that last part applies to dark skin tones as well, hence the emphasis on shading black skin tones with vibrant colours instead of neutrals.

I guess what im getting at is that it feels odd Joel gets a pass at becoming white washed despite his skins ability to be interpretated as Asian or middle eastern but bdubs and scar do not despite their skins displaying the same opportunity of interpretation. I’ll focus more on the interpretation that Joel can be drawn asian. When hes given a white pink undertone, It’s a silent agreement that olive or yellow leaning skin is unattractive and therefore can be changed, simultaneously conceding that light skinned asians are not unique in complexion to white people. Which to me, is disheartening and ignorant.

To summarize, a lot of non-white people have yellow and olive undertones (to the point where it has been subjected to characteriture (as with any nonwhite race)) especially in real life and its sad to see that be erased because people find it odd or unlikely or uneasy to acknowledge. I feel it unnecessary to clarify this but just in case: im not white nor am white passing and this talk comes from personal experiences with racism and erasure

Edit: i dont know why the word slipped my mind but also yes Joel is able to have a lot of SEA qualities and interpretation as well. Personally to me, he is SEA.

I'm tired of waiting am I gonna have to be the guy who writes the colorism in fandom post about Skizzleman, specifically how it is common (maybe even standard) to see him drawn much lighter than both his in-game skin and his irl appearance.

I genuinely don't want to because I would be forced to tackle the nuances of how skin tone is simplified when it comes to perceptions of race (and how that impacts brown CCs with lighter skin tones like Bdubs and I'd argue Pause as well) especially when it comes to cartoonifying and how this is relevant to Skizz because he's technically "white" (afaik) but only by modern understandings of that word and then add in like four paragraphs of disclaimers to try and dissuade people to getting defensive explaining that I don't view this as a BIG ISSUE THAT NEEDS TO BE SOLVED NOW and more of an interesting reflection on how colorism impacts how we view pale as default. but at the same time I genuinely feel gaslit looking at fanart sometimes disclaimer you don't have to disclaimer this is all theory disclaimer skizz dgaf disclaimer yes I am talking about whitewashing a white guy but if you are reading this may I urge you to consider making him just a tad more olive before I feel the need to check namemc for the fiftieth time to see if i have been hallucinating melanin.

[dykedvonte]

Ty for answering my asks! Recently, I saw some fanart of the gender bendered crew and it got me curios, how much would the plot change if Jimmy was a woman. I mean, she would still be emotionally abusive (esp to Fem!Curly), but at lest, I guess, the crash would've never happened (?)

Also, her relationship w/ Anya: if she was assulted still, it prolly would've been dissmissed, since it's between 2 women. Or, if Anya is male in this scenario, he couldn't really be able to talk abt it, since society decided that "women can't r*pe men", so it's not serious and he should suck it up. Man, it's just sucks to be Anya in any scenario my poor girl 😭

What do you think? If you have an opinion on that at all, that is

-💀

I think the scenario's where the gender was flipped or any level of gender based intersectionality is expanded makes it so much more complex.

If this is the scenario with fem!Jimmy, it comes with the territory of questionable internalized homophobia. Does Jimmy brush it off in this scenario because she doesn't think lesbian encounters are real ones? Is she struggling with her identity and taking it out on Anya who may be openly queer compared a fem!Curly who is either straight or just not interested in Jimmy? Perhaps it's a sort of weird entitled that can occur in female dominated spaces "We're both girls, I know what you have, it won't matter." It's still is something I don't see Jimmy denying in this scenario, he never really denies it in canon just talks around it with Curly. Here I can see it's less about the pregnancy and more so about the internalized homophobia. Not seeing Anya as anything but an unwanted aspect of her femineity and the allure of it, there's a lot more objectification of both Curly and Anya in this alteration as I would believe feels better thinking of them in that light if they are just fodder in her mind. Guilty pleasures that no longer bring her such. It's a careful situation because I don't want this to fall into predatory lesbian stereotyping, Jimmy is just a person who does not respect other people or their choice, if it conflict with what he wants or perceived is owed.

The idea of Curly having to report it and outing her not only as a rapist but queer and the denial, especially in the case Anya and Curly are both out as she feels a sort of resentment she can't be secure with herself that way. If it is masc!Curly, there could be the jealousy of him being able to actively pursue relationships he wants while she feels she can't, Anya and Curly playfully flirt, its casual but it's something she longs for in the same way she doesn't. She obsesses over Curly because she wishes she could be Curly in a social sense in both aspect male or female Curly.

If it's fem!Jimmy and masc!Anya? It's a much more delicate situation. In this scenario Jimmy gets pregnant. Maybe Anya does a blood test after the incident and finds out Jimmy is pregnant. It's a very sensitive matter because if it's fem!Curly her first assumption is Anya may have done something. That is just the immediate assumptions in cases like this. I think the fact that Anya is telling her would make Curly think it's not that simple, especially since Jimmy isn't brining it up or really caring but everyone reacts differently. Jimmy is pregnant however, and that's a big deal, she'll figure that out eventually on her own but how will she react? Curly knows it won't be good, Anya knows too.

I think the crash is instigated in this scenerio by fem!Curly actually doing more, refusing to sweep it under the rug because she can conceptualize that fear, likely she and Jimmy are the only girls on board. She trusts everyone, well did trust everyone, but it's just something you live with. She can't just live with that double standard but I feel like she really doesn't know how to address it. How does she bring it up to superiors without implicating Anya? What does she do with Jimmy, it still feels like she's catering to Jimmy but now the concern is primarily focused on the life this baby will be born into. If it is born at all. I don't think Jimmy would try to kill Anya in this concept but try to spin the narrative it was mutual up until she got pregnant. Curly doesn't really buy it but it's a lot of processing, a lot more he said she said but what Jimmy is saying just doesn't make sense. It gives Jimmy too much time to really settle with the fact she's pregnant and likely can't support a kid nor wants to give birth out in space. Jimmy feeling like she's being othered from the only other woman could also be a factor, maybe even starting into her thinking Curly is behaving like a "pick-me" for siding with a guy over her. The crash is more spiteful in terms of having to protect herself alone, due to Curly not outright supporting her delusions.

It really adds a certain horror to Jimmy's pregnancy hallucinations because after the crash they are about her, her symptoms the sign of showing. She doesn't want the child either and considering what being pregnant can do to your mental/physical state, especially some of the more negative symptoms, I doubt she is handling it well. A lot of Anya's struggles are with the stigmas around male victims. His body reacted so did he want it? He's gonna be a father and courts likely will make him pay or care for the baby even if they take Anya's side, their world is just like that. Would the other's blame him for not doing more, he is a man after all? Should he be considered lucky a woman was that into him? It's eating away at him because not only does he not feel safe, he actively blames himself.

In the case Curly is still a cis guy, its that weird feeling guys often get when talking about male victims of assault. I don't think he'd victim blame but he likely asks or thinks about how it could've happened, why wouldn't Anya just overpower Jimmy? Maybe he couldn't? Maybe Anya didn't have it in him to strike a woman. He wouldn't. Now he thinks of what he would have done if Jimmy did something like that to him. SImilary to my trans!Curly post, he's wondering if it could've been him. It's likely one of the first times in his life he has to think of that type of vulnerability in terms of himself and other men and against likely his girl best friend. I think that arm pat right before Jimmy crashes the ship would really make him feel weird, not like he'd have the time to really dig into those feeling but y'know WERE GONNA CRASH!!!.

In terms of Jimmy and Curly's specific relationship, it just gets messier if they aren't both guys or girls. There's a lot of misogny on Jimmy's side with fem!Curly. He often points out she's a woman captain or makes a point of her being one of the few independent woman in her field and how certain men hate that. It's insidious but Curly doesn't think about or like to cause she likes to believe Jimmy isn't one of those guys. He can be a bit antiquated, maybe a bit of a pig but no ones perfect! Here a lot of his resentment is more gear toward a woman having that power over him as Captain/filling the typical male roles he fails at. He can't stand that she's above him in almost aspect and he likely takes it out on other women. Similarly, fem!Jimmy and cis Curly is just as bad. It's a fact of not knowing if she wants to be him, wants him or wants to destroy him. It's obsession without anything positive. She feels entitled to his space and life and time and he has a hard time setting up boundaries cause, well, Jimmy's a girl, his bestfriend and it comes with all the stigmas around boygirl best friends. To him it's a sort of oppressive doting, he feels wrong telling her not to pick and like he's being controlling. That's how she'd spin it whenever he'd try to make boundaries with her.

They are still just friends but most people can't tell even if they can tell it's not healthy, in both cases. Either way I feel like if they were opposite genders to each other there would a specific infatuation Jimmy would have with Curly that would be less hidden but sort of unaddressed because the idea of Curly rejecting them would make them lash out in a way Curly may just leave for their safety. It's also Jimmy wouldn't want to be with Curly specifically but just want what would consistently provide/available.

If they are both girls, its envy. It's that sort of hate that someone fits the standards you don't, wanting them to be picked second or crack. She likes to get into Curly's head, point out flaws and act like it's just her being helpful. She wants Curly to be a girls girl but only for her. There's a sort of possessiveness like purposely jeopardizing relationships because why would a man come first? That girl hates me and is a pick me, why are you friends with her still, Curly? Like this is silly but think about how Regina George treats Gretchen Wieners and that's effectively how fem!Curly and fem!Jimmy would work but technically Curly has the sway of Regina.

I believe the crash would always happen. Jimmy would try to escape responsibility or really thinking about what they did in any world, any gender. It's about facing the consequences, losing things he refuses to let go of or having to deal with responsibilities he's not ready for. The switching of sex or gender really doesn't change those core aspects.