#that got me in the mood to do stuff and i chose to sketch pretty foxman | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

jokertrap-ran · 3 years

Photo

(光与夜之恋 Light and Night) Main Story Chapter 2-5: 时间针脚 The Patchwork of Time Translation

“What are you standing around in a stupor for? See a ghost?”

*Light and Night Master-list *Spoiler free: Translations will remain under cut *Join the Light & Night Discord (＾▽＾)~ ♪ *Main story tag will be #For Light and Night

Behind the glass wall were several blurry figures busying around.

MC: This should be Team A's area.

Mya had suddenly called a few minutes ago to give me directions to the place I was supposed to report to.

I ran what I was going to say to everyone, in the form of an introduction, through my head once more before gently clearing my throat and opening the door.

❖☆———————————★❖

MC: Hello everyone, I'm—

Thunk!

The sound of metal heavily hitting the floor cut my words short as the handle of the door completely fell off.

MC: !?

Did I break it? No way! I broke the office's door on my first day here!?

I didn't quite know what to do for a while. One of the figures closest to the door turned slightly around at the noise.

He had a head full of spiky hair, like that of a hedgehog. He didn't spare even a glance at the door handle; instead, his gaze fell directly upon my person. He shot up from the seat of his workstation.

??: Yoooooou!!

MC: Sorry! It wasn't on purpose, I swear!

??: You're the newcomer that's supposed to be coming in today, right? Sister Zheng Lin, we've got an extra hand!

He excitedly yelled at the other end of the office.

This isn't quite turning out like how I imagined it to be...

Summoned by his yell, a plump woman speed-walked towards us. Her smile was friendly, but there was a sort of unconcealable exhaustion marring her features.

Zheng Lin: Hello. Welcome to Team A. I'm the leader, Zheng Lin.

MC: Hello. Um… I accidentally broke your door handle just now… Sorry…

??: Aw, that thing's been dead half a month ago. We just didn't have time to call someone down to fix it. Don't mind it, yeah?

??: C'mere. I'll bring you to your workstation. Your stuff looks pretty heavy. I'll take it for you, yeah?

He enthusiastically takes the office appliances I'd brought in from my hands and continues walking straight ahead.

Zheng Lin: That works too. I'll leave you to bring her around to meet the others then, Brother Mao. I'll come over once I'm finished up here.

I nodded, following after "Brother Mao".

Brother Mao: I'm Mao Ge, but you can call me Brother Mao! The best rock singer among all Designers here!

He grinned, pulling out a chair and gesturing for me to sit. He then magicked out a rag from god-knows-where and quickly gave the table a wipedown.

Brother Mao: You were 2nd place in the contest, right? We all watched the broadcast; it was absolutely brilliant.

Brother Mao: Especially when you chose Director Qi of all people. Boy, that was a killer! How did you dare to pick him?

Brother Mao: Forget his face, even his breath alone is an icy sub-zero.

Brother Mao: Ever seen an iron tree bloom? I'd say even that's slightly more common than seeing Director Qi smile.

Brother Mao: I'm not talking about his cold smiles, of course. We see that way too often.

MC: Eh? … I just thought getting him to review my work was a rare chance that I couldn't pass up on.

Brother Mao: You go, girl! Looks like we've finally got a competent person in Team A! Feel free to ask me anything if you face any problems in the future! I've gotcha covered!

He grinned, patting himself on the chest to further emphasize his point. He'd already assembled and laid out all of my office appliances on the table at some point in our conversation.

Brother Mao: Alright, everyone! Put everything down. Let me introduce to you our new buddy, (Y/n)!

All the people around me nodded in greeting as Brother Mao introduced them to me one-by-one.

Brother Mao: The one dressed in a Cheongsam is Li Man'man. She came here a minute earlier than you and braved through 3 interviews just to enter Warson.

Li Man'man: Hi, nice to meet you.

Brother Mao: And that's Chen Che, our team's tailoring genius. He's been here for nearly 4 years and has just been promoted to a Senior Designer.

The guy named Chen Che raised his head from the multitude of fabric surrounding him. He adjusted his glasses and gave me a wary look.

Chen Che: Hello.

It was at this moment in time that a guy sporting a quiff hairdo walked past us. His head was haughtily raised and his expression was one of utter disdain.

Man With Quiff Hairstyle: Hmph.

MC: And he is…?

Brother Mao: Don't mind him. He's an annoyance. He just failed the promotion test and is being the green-eyed monster to everyone right now.

I only nodded, not knowing what to say.

Brother Mao: That one over there's Hao Shuai, the trendsetter of Team A and also the King of Werewolf games.

Hao Shuai: Wanna play Werewolf? I'll host one next time, but not now...

Hao Shuai buried his face with a sullen expression as Brother Mao quietly pulled me aside to a corner.

Brother Mao: He's not been in too jolly of a mood these few days. He didn't manage to get promoted to Senior Designer, so he's been pretty depressed about it.

MC: Sounds like it's very hard to get promoted up a rank...

Brother Mao: Precisely! Although Warson has a rank promotion system in place, the way things are being assessed in them makes it scarily hard! People normally have to do it five or six times before they manage to get themselves promoted.

Brother Mao: And, you might even get demoted a rank if the work you turn in doesn't make the cut!

MC: That strict!?

Brother Mao: I'm a Junior Designer like you. I've already taken the assessment around…

Zheng Lin: 10 times.

Brother Mao: You remember all so well, Sister Zheng Lin.

He gallantly retrieved another chair for Zheng Lin to sit on, seemingly paying no heed to the embarrassing number of tries he'd gone through.

Brother Mao: Don't they say that failure's the mother of success? I just have to get a couple more of those and it'll net me a great success!

I laughed at his joke along with Zheng Lin.

Zheng Lin: Our assessment system is just stricter than others.

Zheng Lin: Even though everyone is free to design whatever they like with their creativity as the limit, becoming an actual Fashion Designer is some serious business.

Zheng Lin: Those capable of joining us here in Warson are all talented individuals. Hence, what's really being tested in those assessments are your passion and perseverance.

Zheng Lin: I've welcomed hundreds upon hundreds of rookies during my 10 years here in Team A, but most of them drop out after failing the assessment 3-4 times.

MC: Eh?

Zheng Lin: Firstly, everyone who first comes here holds high self-esteem, so they're a bit more sensitive to criticism. And it is only natural for people to find it unbearable, especially after having been criticized a lot.

Zheng Lin: Secondly, there's a limit to the type of jobs that can be given to Assistants and Junior Designers, so things often end up being boring and repetitive

Zheng Lin: It's hard to go on like that if you don't have the right sort of determination.

MC: ……

Zheng Lin was about to say more when the door slammed open with a "bang!". Several people stood at the entrance, worry written all over their anxious faces.

Colleague A: Can someone consolidate all of Sliver's Autumn-Winter fabrics into a document?

Colleague A: I still have to go down to the mall and conduct surveys and research so I won't be able to do that in time!

Colleague B: Some trouble cropped up regarding the visas of the foreign models who're slated for a shoot next week, so we need another 18 new ones!

Colleague B: What should I do, Sister Zheng Lin!?

Zheng Lin gave a helpless sigh.

Zheng Lin: I'd originally wanted you to let you get used to things around here, but we have our hands full… Do you mind helping us?

MC: … Sure thing!

Zheng Lin: Then, could you first help us by going to the warehouse and picking up Silver's Autumn-Winter fabrics and consolidating them into a sample book after?

Zheng Lin: You can get Brother Mao to help you check it through once you're done.

I nodded and joined the fray.

Time went by. And finally, I finished my very first task after an hour. Brother Mao told me to take it up to the Team A representative who was in the meeting after checking through it.

❖☆———————————★❖

It was clearly noon soon, yet the doors of the meeting rooms on both sides of the corridor were still tightly shut, I could occasionally hear the sound of loud discussions coming from within.

❖☆———————————★❖

MC: Excuse me, I'm here to deliver the fabric samples.

Pushing the door open, I saw a Designer who was in the middle of loudly explaining his idea while Sariel held a pen, looking down at the document in his hand.

All the other Designers were either listening intently or hurriedly sketching out their new ideas, having been struck by a sudden wave of inspiration. It was almost as if the very air itself was crackling with ideas, going head to head with each other, gathering and merging into a brand new storm of ideas.

I’m going to be taking part in meetings with everyone in the future too… I couldn’t help but jump for joy at the exciting notion.

Placing the fabric catalogue book down, I couldn’t stop myself from taking one last glance at the meeting room before I left.

❖☆———————————★❖

Brother Mao: Oh, right. Don't forget to retrieve the catalogue book once the meeting upstairs is done.

MC: Okay.

❖☆———————————★❖

Everyone left after the meeting ended. I picked up the scattered pieces of fabric, stacking them neatly into a pile. It was only then that I noticed a pen lying on the ground.

The pitch-black pen was see-through, slender, and sturdy, with three gold-stamped petals at the very end.

MC: This is...

An image of Sariel wielding this pen with his head bowed in thought appeared in my mind.

MC: Is this pen his? It certainly suits that icy countenance of his...

❖☆———————————★❖

I bent down to pick it up, but the moment my fingers brushed against it… I suddenly felt an inexplicable sharp jolt of pain piercing my head.

My heart clenched violently, almost as if a nightmare that had been buried deep within its depths was about to be awakened. The stifling feeling of sadness and despair washed over me together with the odd feeling of my heart having been impaled by something.

What’s going on?

I pressed against my chest, trying to get through this sudden bout of pain that came out of seemingly nowhere.

Sariel: What's going on here?

There seems to be a faint voice ringing through my ears. The pen was taken away from me the next moment. Gone with it were the odd sensations.

I blearily looked at Sariel who had suddenly popped up from nowhere, still slightly woozy in the head.

Sariel: What are you standing around in a stupor for? See a ghost?

MC: I don't know what happened to me earlier…

Sariel: That's what I'd like to ask you.

☆Light Choice: Explain what you felt earlier

I shook my head, trying to recall that odd sensation you felt earlier.

MC: I… My chest and head just suddenly started hurting.

MC: I know I’m in the meeting room right now, but it kind of felt as if I wasn’t here at the same time…

MC: Like a nightmare, you can never wake up from…

Sariel’s expression changed minuscule bit upon hearing the word “nightmare”.

Sariel: How about now?

MC: I'm fine now, and the uncomfortable feeling's also gone.

Sariel: Has this happened before?

MC: Once…?

★Night Choice: Conceal what you felt earlier

MC: I just felt a little light-headed… I'm okay now.

MC: Oh, right. I picked up your pen.

I pointed towards the pen that he'd already reclaimed, which was now in his hand. Sariel only frowned.

Sariel: You felt light-headed after picking up this pen?

It was only when he mentioned it that I realized that that seemed to be the case. But what would a pen have anything to do with a bout of dizziness?

Sariel coldly grabs my hand, making my heart stop cold in my chest. However, all he did was stare at it in silence for a few seconds before releasing me just as quickly.

MC: What are you looking at? Is there something wrong with my hand?

Sariel: Nothing. It's well and fine.

What's up with Sariel? Grabbing my hand out of nowhere like that and not even telling me the reason why...

So, I ended up giving my hand a thorough check as well. There was nothing off about it, but I couldn't help feeling a little worried.

I'd also experienced some "auditory hallucinations" back then at the rooftop…

MC: Maybe I should go get myself a check-up at the hospital just in case…

Sariel: You look pretty peppy on your feet to me. Doesn't seem like there's anything physically wrong about you.

His gaze smoothly slides up from my face to the top of my head as he spoke.

Sariel: Though, I can't say the same about the other parts of you.

MC: ……!

I was fuming, yet I didn't dare to express it with a vehement glare. Seeing how riled up I was at it, yet unable to do anything about it, a flicker of a smirk made its way up to a corner of his mouth.

This was my second time seeing him smile today… The iron tree has bloomed…

Sariel: Are there flowers growing on my face?

I shook my head.

Sariel: A ghost then?

I shook my head again.

Sariel: Then why are you looking at me as if you've just seen a monster?

MC: You just smiled. It's too rare of a sight.

Sariel: … How stupid.

He put on a straight face as he pocketed his pen and turned to head out.

Suddenly remembering something, I hurriedly pushed the door open and ran after him.

MC: Wait a minute, Director Qi! Are you free right now?

❖☆————— ⊹ For Light & Night⊹ —————★❖

Previous Part: (Chapter 2-3) | Next Part: (Chapter 2-8)

#光与夜之恋 #Light and Night #Otome #Translations #Tencent #萧逸 #Osborn #齐司礼 #Sariel #陆沉 #Evan #查理苏 #Charlie #夏鸣星 #Jesse #For Light and Night

27 notes · View notes

go-learn-esperanto · 3 years

Text

Survey answers until now:

This was so fun. There are a lot of answers and that's pretty pog! I'm not gonna include everyone but I assure you I've been reading all of them.

Edit: the resolution was awful. Sorry about that. Updated version now! :)

Now the text answers my beloved <3

Here are some of my favourites!

Mumza. On accident.

How do you cosplay on accident? 👁️👁️

Phil and say it's Urahara

200 IQ play right here

none but i wanted to tell you its not much better. im going as a Supernatural character smh

We really are on Tumblr.com

im doing rivals duo with my friend =]

cc!Ranboo basically. now it just sounds weird. I mean who dresses up as irl celebrities and not the roles they play? man. it just sounds cringe now

I'm gonna throw on a green hoodie, say I'm dream and call it a day B)

Put a plastic plate on it too and it's complete

I have a half-made Ranboo cosplay, but I'm also too old lol

DO IT. I don't care. Even if it's just for you to wear at home. Do it. Nobody it's too old to dress as things they like!

tubbo :D (not 2 self promo but ill be posting pics @starbug.png on insta 👀)

Check them out! :)

There's a bunch of Wilbur/Ghostbur cosplayers. I love you and the Grisn cosplayer very parasocially.

Also the Mumza cosplayers

I got my ex into mcyt a day or so before we broke up because he started to ignore me > - >

Well... That's.

Figured out one of my besties is into it bc I saw a sketch of the Llama Line by L'Targay

One of my irl friends is an OG dsmp fan, she was there the very first stream. It’s just fun to talk to her about stuff.

A group of 17 year old boys called me cringe at the publix selfcheckout bc of my quackity shirt and i laughed so hard that they got confused like. its not bullying if theyre right

This one. This one has to be my favourite. That's the spirit.

There is a girl in my class who I talked to very little. We were supposed to do an assignment based on a hobby we liked, so I chose MINECRFAT. After I presented this, she approached me after class and said she liked my presentation. She showed me some of her dsmp drawings, like the realistic ones based off photos. She fucking amazing at it and they’re incredible

i was having a rlly bad day at school and in maths class(my last hour of the day)my teacher started playing jump in the cadillac and i just started crying

I really don't want to laugh at your suffering but damn that's hilarious from the outside. I hope you're doing better now tho 💜

i showed my mom a ranboo video and accidentally reviled that i stole almost his every one of his speech patterns

In class, a guy compliments my Ranboo hoodie. I look at his hoodie and he’s wearing a Wilbur one. I compliment his as well. A girl nearby stands up and looks at us. She is wearing a Quackity hoodie. Somehow the universe has placed three Dream SMP fans together in the same class. The best part is you would never know we were fans without our merch. We could be anyone. We walk amongst the living

That makes me want to buy merch so bad

last night I wrote penis smp fanfic while sitting right next to my mom who doesn't think I swear. she could have looked at my screen at any time.

Asked “does a historical speech from a minecraft roleplay count?” For a kinetic typography assignment

Wrote a lyrical analysis on the l’manburg theme for a school project

the reason i didn't answer "mumbo jumbo" to the philza's wife question is because mumbo jumbo is too busy being a gay whore in last life. he's gay married but also flirts with every man he comes across

True. Absolutely true.

I literally saw an anti vaxxer on tumblr talking about how it's bad that Tommy and tubbo have to get vaccinated just to see each other irl

!! i have a VERY IMPORTANT FACT: niki nihachu <3 also dsmp women in general,, hannah niki puffy tina collab when pls give it to me its all i want in life,,,,,, also unrelated but im in a musicy mood listen to romance by yoasobi and watch the video trust me its stunning :]

Watched it! Really cool visuals! The music just brings me back to my VOCALOID fandom fase (not that is possible to love the VOCALOID fandom completly though. I definitely haven't.)

I’m making a Wilbur soot animatic based on The Fall by lovejoy and I hope I can get it finished by the 16th !!

Good luck!!! That's awesome!

im in this hellhole more than 1 year how am i still alive akpqpqlajwhoq give money

I have exactly one irl friend who watches dsmp n I'm the one who got her into it >:]

Evil >:]

"Im not gay I just can't read" - Jack Manifold

i just want to know why ranboo was at the red banquet, dressed up and wearing a blindfold . w h y

i can't wait for big lore to come back djfjdkkf

Same

Why must life give its hardest battles to its weakest warriors

Sun Tzu, The Art of War

Please help okay so the problem is "Let P be the set of all people who have ever lived and define a relation R on P as follows: for every r and s that are elements or P, rRs <-> r is an ancestor of s or r =s. Is R a partial order relation? Prove or give a counter example." It's definitely reflexive ince when s=r then s=r which is true. It isn't symmetrical since that would be weird as hell, I mean a grandparent cannot be the grandchild of their own grandchild that would fuck up the family tree even more than the DSMPs but like, how do I prove that mathematically? Like, if rRs and sRr then r = s but "if person A is either a grandparent or the same person as person B and person B is either the grandparent or the same person as person A then person A is person B" just feels like a weird sentence.

Just did the Komaeda checklist for c!Wilbur...

I don't wanna know. (I kinda do actually)

Catch me dual-wielding Hermitcraft and the Dream SMP… call me Hannah Montana cause I’m the best of both worlds

Same. Same. Call me Ariana Griande because I'm a-grian with you.

i just saw a post. soon, we will have enough tommy father figures for a mamma mia! au.

Months before I got into DSMP I had an internet friend interested in it and I was like "lol, nice, but could never be me" because I had gotten out of my 2016-2018 MCYT phase not that long ago at that point and didn't think I'd go back... Well...

ldshadowlady is a goddess amongst us all and we should recognize her as such.

True

HMMM well i messed up my eyeliner which has made me quite sad

Mumbo Jumbo could steal anyone’s wife

I always talk about wanting to bake bread again but I keep procrastinating. Same goes for writing fanfiction and stuff too. I have countless abandoned fics across all of the platforms I'm on, plus about ten that never made it out of Google docs or pure writer. I think I have a bit of a problem lol

I can assure you're not the only one. 👁️👄👁️

We all suffer from the procrastination problem. Don't put yourself down too much ok? You're doing that for yourself and if you don't feel like doing it then you don't feel like doing it. 💜

Wilbur with wings is unappreciated especially when you consider all the cool headcanons you can have for what they'd be like after his revival like skeleton wings or phantom wings or only wings DreamXD can see. Also ghostbur w/ blue melting/ evaporating wings *longing sigh*

That's pretty cool!

I figured out I was fine with any pronouns by brainstorming self insert dream smp fanfic

I have a huge crush on quackity

This one broke me and I don't know why. Every time I look at it I start laughing my ass off.

I got into it because of Woe to the People of Order

Oh, woe to thee, ye people of order

I hope your homes continue to smolder

And that you never rise again

And woe to those that called me a friend~

That's a badass way to join a fandom

I just miss Ghostbur man

Don't we all? (っ.❛ ᴗ ❛.)っ Have some blue

#mcyt #dream smp #dream smp survey #survey #mcytblr #There have been so many more between compiling all of this...#long post

15 notes · View notes

1899-newsboy-strike · 4 years

Text

The Unexplainable Pt 2 - A Twilight Love Triangle

The Unexplainable Masterlist

A/N: Just a quick disclaimer, if you see this story on Wattpad under the same title, it is not a copy or I’m not trying to copy it, it is my story from over three years ago that I am just rewriting and actually finishing Also rewriting this made me realize I used to never use punctuation for dialogue and always used the word “said” and I also always tried making my characters clairvoyant for some reason. This part also just has so much self projection from younger me

Warnings: bullying

Summary: The back stabber

-------------------------------------

Once you got home you got your things from your car and went straight up to your room. You got your homework done as quick as you could, and started working on your art project. You had to be done by the end of the month, and you wanted to work as much as you could because you wanted it to be perfect. The teacher said that it had to be something from our imagination, and it could be anything you wanted, so you chose a wolf. You didn't know why, but you felt like that's what you needed to draw. You heard Bella's truck pull up in the driveway, and you quickly got up to lock your door. You sat down again continuing to sketch the wolf, when you heard your door knob jiggle followed by a knock on my door.

"Hey Cassie can I come in?" You heard Bella ask from the other side of the door.

"No Bella, I'm kind of busy with something for school and I can't have any distractions, sorry!" You called out, continuing what you were doing before.

You technically weren’t lying, because you really did want to get a lot of detail into your project, but you also didn’t want to talk to her if she's going to talk about you behind your back, and act like she didn't do anything when you are at home. You were almost done with half of the sketch, and by that time it was already one in the morning, so you decided it was time to go to sleep before you had to go to school. You woke up four hours later, getting lunch ready for school and dressing in whatever you grabbed out of your closet. You grabbed an apple on the way out the door, eating it on your way to school.

You’d always been the first one there, which you were more than okay with. You usually stayed in your car reading a book, so you didn’t mind not having the chaos of a crowded parking lot. You got out of your car and went to your first class when you heard the bell ring, pulling your attention away from the book in your hand, and you couldn’t help but hope today would be better than yesterday. You couldn't help but notice Bella with her group of friends when you walked by her car. She didn't even give a second glance at you when she saw you, and you felt like you shouldn't have even been there. If your own sister couldn't even accept you in front of people, then maybe you were a mistake.

You walked by the Cullen's and couldn’t help but notice Jasper staring at me with what seemed like pity. You couldn’t help but feel confused, knowing it must have been your imagination. When you were about to look away, you felt a tear run down your cheek and whipped it away quickly, looking down and continuing your walk to class. As usual you sat down in the back and just listened quietly while the teacher was talking about equations you already knew the answers to. You heard laughing and whispering before suddenly there was a paper was thrown on your desk. You unfolded it and it read, 'No one likes you, you freak go kill yourself. You're just a mistake that your parents probably didn't want to make.' As the day went on you got more notes, and your mood just got worse by the time lunch came. You were sitting at the lunch table, picking at your food, thinking about what everyone had been telling you today. You suddenly felt a wave of what felt like happiness or joy wash over you, but just as soon as it came, it was gone. You shook your head to clear the confusion, putting your head in your hands.

Unknowing to you, the Cullens were sat across the cafeteria, their full attention on you. Jasper could feel your emotions the most out of anyone in the cafeteria, and it caught the attention of everyone sitting around him. Rosalie had also taken a liking to you, despite your blue and red eyes, you had reminded her of her younger sister. It had been her idea for Jasper to use his gift on you, but when they saw it backfire, every single one of them was even more confused by you than before.

You couldn't take how you were feeling anymore and shot up out of my seat getting your stuff hurrying toward the trash can throwing your things away, going to my last period of the day, art. You had debated whether or not to skip that period since you had already finished the sketch, and just needed to paint it, but you decided to stay. You let out a sigh when you sat down in your spot, and got out black paint, painting the wolf as realistic as you could. Once the bell rang you had surprisingly finished and handed the finished piece to your teacher, turning in the assignment early. After you were done talking to the teacher you headed home the day never leaving your mind.

***********

It had been almost a week and everything had gotten worse, and you didn't know how much more of this you could take. You’d been dealing with it for too long, and you didn’t have any control over it. You’d been crying yourself to sleep every night, trying to keep quiet so your dad and Bella don't hear and ask questions. You've had depression ever since middle school when everyone started bullying you about your eyes. You wore sunglasses most of the time which was weird because Forks wasn’t sunny, but you thought it was better than people seeing your eyes.

You let out a sigh, getting up from your bed since you couldn't get any sleep the night before and when you looked in the mirror and your eyes were still puffy from crying so you splashed water on your face hoping that would do something and started heading down to school. Once it was lunch you sat down eating and drawing whatever came to mind. After you were done, you looked at it and got confused. You’d drawn two sets of eyes, one was red and the other was a sort of golden color. You looked down at the picture confused before turning the page, drawing something else. This time it was a picture of someone but you couldn't really tell who it was.

"So Bella, your sister seems to be getting weirder lately." You heard one of Bella's friends say. You had been fed up with them talking poorly about you, but you were too scared to ever say anything so all you could do was sit and listen.

"Yeah she just doesn't fit in, she belongs in a circus or something am I right?" Bella joked and that got all her friends laughing. You looked down at your lap feeling the tears start to stream down my face.

Before you could even think about what to do, the bell rang and you headed off to art. Instead of going to art you just sat on the steps outside of school and rested your head on the side of the steps. You silently cried to yourself because you knew the bell would ring soon, and you weren’t going to let anyone see you cry so you hid your face. The stairs were pretty long so you weren't really taking up space, and if you wanted to go home you could just get up and walk to your car since you were right in front of the parking lot. You heard the bell ring and you let out a quiet squeak shaking. You heard footsteps from people walking by and heard various comments. 'Freak' 'Weirdo' 'Mistake' 'Go kill yourself' etc.

You heard what sounded as if they were walking together not like the bundle of kids earlier. You moved closer to the side of the wall, shaking trying not to let out a sob waiting for whoever was walking to tell you something. You heard some of the footsteps continue but one stopped and stayed. You waited for whoever it was to tell me something but to your surprise they didn't. The person suddenly sat down beside you making you flinch when they put a hand on your back. You looked to your right a little to see who it was, and saw Rosalie.

"Hey, why are you crying?" Rosalie asked. You just stared at her, not knowing what to say. You just shook your head, looking forward, not wanting to say anything. "Well Y/N, my family and I were wondering if you would like to come home with us because we wanted to talk to you about something." She explained. You thought about it for a while and you guess it wouldn't hurt.

"I g-guess so" You stuttered out, and as you said that there was a screeching making your head shoot up to see what was going on.

Your sister was about to be hit by a car and you didn't feel worried one bit. You actually didn't feel anything. You felt numb and you just laid your head on the side of the brick wall closing your eyes. Before you knew it you were in a house you’d never been in before, and were surrounded by the Cullen's. You looked around and the room alone was huge and you couldn’t help but wonder what the rest of it looked like.

"Hey Y/N, you fell asleep and you were coming here with us anyway so we just brought you with us." Rosalie explained, making you look over at her. You nodded and looked around at the Cullen family silently, not being able to find your voice. "What we wanted to tell you will have to wait until my dad gets home from work. Don't worry, I texted your dad and told him that you were going to spend the weekend with us and he was excited that you were making friends, so he said that it was fine and that he'd see you when you got home on Monday." Rosalie continued and you nodded again.

When Jasper sat down on the couch next to you, you looked up at him. You looked in his eyes and suddenly images flashed before yours. It was of Jasper, but it looked like it was a long time ago. When you saw an image where he had been bit by something you flinched, and suddenly saw that he had red eyes, along with the many people around him. You almost felt crazy, feeling as though you were seeing things.

"You're not seeing things." Edward explained, popping out of nowhere. You jumped from surprise, looked at him not knowing what he’d meant.

"What do you mean?" You asked, looking at everyone around the room.

"Let's sit down Y/N." Carlisle explained when he walked into the room, taking off his coat before sitting across from you. "We’re all vampires, and we may or may not know why your eyes are different colors, and we’re trying to figure that out. I'm looking into it to see what I can find out. Some of us have gifts. Edward can read minds, Jasper can feel and manipulate emotions, and Alice can see the future." Carlisle explained, making you nod in understanding. You couldn’t have helped but think it was cool, and Edward laughed making you glare at him.

"Don't go through my thoughts or..." You paused for a little thinking. "I'll try to find a way to kill you if you do." You continued, laying back on the couch, looking up at the ceiling closing your eyes. You felt eyes on you, and looked up at everyone staring at you. "What?" You asked.

"Well you took us being vampires pretty well." Alice explained making you shrug. You laid my head on the side of the couch closing your eyes once again.

"I'm weird, you're weird. We're all weird here." You explained not being bothered.

"Come on Y/N, you're sleeping in Emmet and Rosalie's room since that's the only one that really has a bed." You heard someone say making you sigh.

"But I don't even have any clothes to sleep in." You mumbled tiredly as you started falling asleep on the couch.

"That's fine, we'll find something, come on." Alice said excitedly.

"Give me a minute." You mumbled, falling asleep before you could stop yourself.

-------------------------------------

Tag List: Let me know if you would like to be tagged in this series

@kettnerjanea @itsalonelygirlinalonelyworld @autumnpauley20 @thot-for-mikehanlon

#twilight #twilight imagine #twilight x reader #bella swan x sister reader #swan reader #swan!reader #seth clearwater #seth clearwater x reader #seth #alec #alec volturi #alec x reader #alec volturi x reader #seth x reader #the unexplainable series

136 notes · View notes

kittymaverick · 4 years

Text

Mystery Case Files 21: The Harbinger commentary and review, part 2.

outSpoiler free review first: Holy SHIT GRANDMA studios, talk about knocking the ball out of the park. Not only was that a solid good MCF game to start off with, you’ve now set up the expectation for the next game so high, I’m honestly a little afraid for you. Like... do you know how high the bar is now that you’ve hinted about the content of the next game? Right, coming back to Harbinger for a second. Barring one tiny little slip up which I think was just something that got lost in translation (English is like that), the lore of MCF managed to stay intact, which needs to be applauded. At one point, I almost questioned if there might be almost too many references, especially with that happens to the references in the game itself. (Yes, I, the MCF nerd and fanatic, actually had that thought). I still flip-flop a bit on whether this was a good execution, or a good but shaky execution. For one thing, the way it’s executed... wow, that’s some heavy stuff emotionally. Which is why I’m questioning if that’s “good”, because I suppose there was a line of emotional heaviness I didn’t expect we’ll cross in MCF, but GRANDMA took it there. And so far... part of me is guiltily okay with it, but wow... The studio’s art style does suggest that a detraction from from MCF’s usual Elizabethan English Horror Story with a side of Soul Steampunk and Celtic Druidism would not necessarily be a bad thing. That GRANDMA chose otherwise though, and stuck with a very, very MCF story (albeit more limited to the Celtic legends part), takes guts. What I do wish we’ll get, after the next game, is a story line that’s a GRANDMA original, sort of like Eipex’s the Black Veil, because I think the studio has potential in creating something that’s more them without pulling away too much from MCF. Anyway, that’s the spoiler free review part. Back to my spoiler filled commentary!

Aisling: I know I act suspicious, but I’m just a psychic! MD: I know I’m just a detective, but people keep dying around me, so hey, we’ve got that in common. Aisling: James gave me this cube by the way-- huh? *Emblem of MD appears* ...I’m sorry, that ancient celtic emblem... has a bloody hat. It has a bloody hat. I’m DYING.

Realized I jumped back too far to do this retroactive commentary. Oops.

MD: Okay, well, maybe he isn’t dead yet. We could probably dig him out-- *Nigel turns to bone* MD: ...Never mind. He’s beyond saving. Someone get the coroner!

Six thousand mirrors in the room, and not one shows your face. MD: A technique I have perfected over the two decades of my career. Didn’t save you from getting married to a homicidal madman though. MD: ...I don’t think he picked me because of my looks to begin with.

...Hey MD, I know paper work wasn’t exactly involved and all, but did you actually divorce Charles, or did you just betray him? MD: *DEATH GLARE* You know what, pretend I never asked. MD: You’d better.

MD: Let’s see what skeletons Nigel has in his closet. You know, the last time you found skeletons in a closet, quite literally... MD: Shut up, I was trying not to think about that! (This happened in Key to Ravenhearst. The Skeleton was Charles and Victor.)

Okay, so James was a MCF fanboy, Marge you met on one of your American trips, Nigel was a Fate Carney, John worked on a restored Ravenhearst. I don’t want to say her Majesty might have under exaggerated the number of keywords there were going on here... MD: Oh no, she definitely made it out to be less important than it seemed. She also definitely sent me in because the report she’s going to get out of this is going to be spectacular. The idea that HRM might be the ultimate MCF fan in-universe tickles me with delight. MD: And fills me with utter dread.

Nigel’s shadow puppet theatre: I got fired from the carnival! Boo! MD: Nigel, getting fired from Fate’s Carnival probably saved your ass. Temporarily, until whatever is going on here got you. MD: .................... What? Oh... MD: Yeah. Oh geez I’m looking forward to the case after this now! 8D MD: Why is it that the more I’m tortured, the more gleeful you are?

*Telephone rings* MD: Hello? Marge: HELP ME SOMETHING IS HERE AAAAHHH Well shit. MD: Yeah, she’s done for. Let’s go see the body.

*Gibs collects collectibles before going to body* *I die laughing because that’s my priority too*

MD: Oh no Marge I’m so sorry I couldn’t save you in time... ...Yeah right, says the person who doesn’t want to get their hand on the black stuff. MD: Look, my sorrow doesn’t in anyway override my desire for hygiene, okay? Reminds me of that one time I called some detectives from the last century dandies for refusing to stick their hand into a barrel of rainwater...

MD can I point out how you’re making detailed sketches of MARGE’S BODY in your journal? MD: Look it’s this or pyromania, okay? Don’t judge me. Also, I’m starting to think people that meet you on your cases shouldn’t bother locking their diaries. You always manage to crack them open.

Marge: Oh James is such a darling, I should get him to marry my daughter, then I’ll be such a happy mother-in-law. .............................. MD: ...................... Well, um, I guess Marge was a cougar on the inside, maybe? MD: Yeah, let’s phrase it like that (Restrain desire to make crude NSFW jokes...)

Marge: DAMN THAT GIRL FOR STEALING MY BOY. Marge, seriously, there’s officer Davis. I’m sure he’s just as nice! MD: And not on anyone’s death list. For now. MD: Don’t say that...

Davis: Well, I guess that’s one more evidence against Aisling. HOLD IT! MD: This note here shows clearly that Marge intended to frame Aisling for an attack on her! And the diary entries clearly document how much she hates the suspect. Therefore, the evidence shouldn’t be permissible-- Davis: Yeah, but Marge is dead, and there really isn’t anyone else in town left. *Record scratch* MD: ....It could be... you? Davis: Harhar, look here’s the evidence, go talk to Aisling. MD: Urgh, fine. It’s okay, MD, I was rooting for you there at least!

Aisling: Death, death is all around us! *Flees* MD: Okay, Aisling, that’s really not helping and only making you more suspicious! But since you’re away, I’m going to rifle through your trailer. Um, now who’s suspicious???

Hm, you know, this place would have been great for a holiday spot. MD: I don’t know, given my records with holidays... ...True, you’ll probably end up doing exactly what you are doing now. MD: That said, I think I’ll take a slice of apple pie since no one’s looking. Does the agency pay for your food on your cases? MD: They’d better because I’m giving the recipes to Her Majesty if they don’t...

Aisling: I came here to save John but he’s locked upstairs, please help! MD: Um, if you had let me come with you... maybe some time could have been saved? Aisling: But what if I get killed first then? MD:........ She’s got a point. MD: Dammit, fine...

Hm, so John’s ancestor worked on the original Ravenhearst... We’ll probably need to open up the original game to see if that was the guy that fell from the construction site. (My guess is it’s not, because that carpenter was originally meant to be Rose Summerset’s husband, so it should have been Summerset. Plus Rose’s kids were the twins and Victor.)

Oh damn, a model of Ravenhearst-- MD: Hm, it’s missing a weather vane. ........... MD: Look, just because I burn the place down several times, doesn’t mean I don’t care what it looks like, okay? Can you point out the window that you escaped out of by any chance? 8D MD: *sighs* This one...

Aisling: John, NOOOOOO. MD: Right, gotta cut him down quick! He might still be alive. *Proceed to spend over minutes solving puzzles* MD: I swear, this happened very fast in actuality... Never as fast as the plot demanded though...

*Puts weather vane on model* *Model turns into a raven* MD: ???????????????? Okay, I need to take points off for THAT ridiculous transformation and animation. XD

Aisling: I can’t take this anymore! MD: I know this is hard, Aisling-- Aisling: Here’s the next slab, btw. ....This mood whiplash... I’m dying.

Um, so apparently the banshee wasn’t trying to destroy the world, but was trying to restore herself, which... you disrupted. MD: Look, Allison and her friends needed rescuing okay? I couldn’t just sit idling by. ...If that was disrupted, then how DID Aisling turn human then??? MD: .....Let’s save that mystery for another time because I feel a headache incoming... (Fix edit: It seems to imply that the ritual was only disrupted, not failed, so Aisling did get her skin back, though now she doesn’t remember being a banshee...)

Aisling: I’m a banshee? That’s... That’s impossible. MD: Well, I’ve been through a lot to say most impossible things are actually probable in reality, though if you somehow don’t remember me shoving you back into the cave, um, then I’m grateful. Once you do, please don’t kill me. BTW, your turn on the cube of mystery!

Aisling: Well, if I’m a banshee, I guess I should go back to Dire Grove. We can catch the next ferry. MD: You know that’s a really long trip right? It might take us the better half of a day-- Or a single puzzle’s worth of time. MD: ...Where was THAT kind of fast travel all these years??? I do like how it’s implied that you guys had a huge detour with picking people up and dropping them off though.

Ais: Okay, we’re here in Dire Grove-- AH! MD: Wow, even nature is saying NO to you. Ooooooor it could be a certain immortal druid-- MD: Please don’t. It’s fine! We have a banshee. MD: All she does is predict death! Oh yeah, forgot about that...

*Aisling gets “kidnapped” by green energy* Gibs: That can’t be healthy. MD: That’s honestly pretty normal at this point for us. At least she didn’t get dropped down a tube.

Um, what’s with the Chinese incense in a Druid’s domain? X’D (I’m going to pretend they traded that...)

(I honestly don’t have a lot of stuff to comment on in the section in Dire Grove, because there isn’t much to snark about. Which, I guess, comes to show that 99% of silliness comes from MD dealing with PEOPLE, alive, dead, revived, or otherwise not really a human.)

*Aisling goes back to banshee form* MD: First, no hard feelings about last time, right? Aisling: *stares* MD: Please, thank you, and I’m sorry??? Aisling: You did help me out, so I guess it’s fine. MD: *sigh of relief* BTW, four people technically did DIE though in the process. Aisling: Um, that wasn’t me, if you recall your lore correctly. MD: True enough, but STILL. Just pointing it out. You want her to scream in your ear? She’s still got time for that.

HOW AISLING BECAME A BANSHEE, AGAIN. Aisling: To make a long story short, there was a lot of puzzles Puzzles which you had to personally solve, without MD’s help? Aisling: It really makes you appreciate how hard MD has had it for the last 21 years...

Did... did you just KILL four people to restore your spirit? Aisling: I just helped their soul cross over! I swear! Aisling, you’re being really SUS right now and I’ve practice how to spot a liar lately! Aisling: I only predict deaths! And then find the souls and tell them where to go. I swear that’s my task. EVERYONE VOTE AISLING AISLING IS THE IMPOSTER

Is one of your abilities literally “summon joyride”???? Aisling: it’s a carriage A carriage can be an awesome joyride if you use it irresponsibly Aisling: How does MD tolerate you? They don’t, they’ve just had worse company and I’m a lesser evil. 8D

Aisling (actually Gibs): *suffers through the last giant super puzzle* ...Yeah, REALLY makes you appreciate what MD goes through. Aisling: Is it always this bad??? Sometimes. I’ve seen worse.

Gibs: THAT CARRIAGE IS BADASS. See, I told you it was a joyride. Aisling: You know, I think I’ll float back to the MD. No joyrides. Awwwwwwwwwwww... Okay, now let’s rewind back to when MD started their rant. **************************************************

Aisling: BTW, this energy is still floating about. And I think I know why. Will you accept this energy and use it to save the world? MD: Oh hold ON a minute. You want ME to do WHAT? Aisling: Save the world. You heard what I said. MD: Okay, listen. I started this detective job mostly because I thought it was cool, and it was for the first couple of cases where all I had to deal with was bust the criminal organization STAIN and recover the Hope diamond for the Queen. But then that’s where all my trouble started because she sent me to this creepy manor which turned out to be a prison to not one, not two, but FOUR ghosts. What’s even worse is the first time I went, I thought I only had to rescue Emma. I was wrong, and for the longest time, I thought Fate Carnival folks were dying from my mistake. Turns out later it was completely personal. This was everything that happened before I met YOU. (Again, really sorry about kicking you back into the cave and getting you stuck in the situation you were in in the last who knows how many years...) Afterwards, I went to the Louisiana which got me on the bad side of a certain ghost pirate, who turned out to be the grandfather of the guy killing the carney folks from his mother’s side. Which was why he was killing them by the way. She sold him to Fate’s Carnival. Anyway, after figuring out that I’ve dun goofed, I went back to Ravenhearst manor, which turned out there was a WHOLE OTHER SECTION I didn’t discover last time, which was somehow a very personalized and twisted marriage proposal that I didn’t notice until too late. I burned THAT down for good measure before taking a break in some place near a lake. But then that guy’s FATHER took up issue with what I did, which I didn’t even started, to be honest. He tried to kill me for whatever grudge it was that he had. I had to stab his horocrux with my badge to get him to stop that time. But then it turns out that father ALSO has some offspring here in Dire Grove, and I had to come back to prevent THAT from going down in flames as well. Thankfully, I think they remained sane. I can’t say the same for the twins, who turned out to be the evil guy’s kids. They most definitely went insane, and REMADE Ravenhearst, which I had to burn down for THE THIRD TIME. All that plus the jump I took landed me in an asylum, which turned out to be the one where both the evil bald guy and his dad was imprisoned once upon a time. Of course, the guy’s father tried to kill me, AGAIN. Took care of that, and also removed the shard that was driving me bonkers. It only gets worse from here though. I got chased around by an woman with a clock for her heart who I had to defenestrate out a clock tower. She didn’t stab me, but then the guy who probably ENGINEERED MY ENTIRE LIFE did, because apparently he wanted to use my soul’s virtue to anchor death to the mortal world or something. I got an immortality feather out of that, I guess, so it wasn’t too bad, but I basically DIED. And then afterwards there was that undead guy who was really hung up about his biker jacket. Next was the evil guy’s ancient youngest son nearly destroying the world (4th wall break: THIS IS VERY IMPORTANT) trying to revive him which thankfully DIDN’T HAPPEN BECAUSE OH GODS I WOULD HAVE DIED FOR REAL ON THE SPOT IF IT DID, FEATHER OR NOT. Then a creepy woman in a mirror had to be locked back into the mirror dimension. And that’s when my agency had a fucking SECURITY BREACH which turned out to have been in the making for YEARS. And then the pirate guy came back and nearly enslaved me. I had to blow up his ship and exorcise him from this world. And AFTER all of that, I was finally sent to Blackmoor, where I met YOU, and also saw a bunch of people marginally related to me die from a cause we still don’t have any answers for. *DEEP INHALE*

Aisling: Okay, so your point is.... MD: My POINT is.... out of ALL the sane and wholesome people in the world who don’t have ANY BAGGAGE whatsoever, why do I, the Master Detective, have to be the one to save the world here-- Charles: Hello. MD: *SCREEEEEEECH*

CHARLES IT’S BEEN FOREVER-- wait, you’re not here to serve the divorce papers are you? Charles: Of course not. I’m asking MD to come back home with me. MD: WHAT?! Charles: Where else would I welcome you back to? *Evil cackle* ......... 8D8D8D8D8D8D8D8D Aisling: ........... :| :| :| :| :| :| :| :| :| MD: .................D:< D:< D:< D:< D:< D:< D:< MD: Aisling, hand that energy over, I’ve a WORLD TO BURN.

I have to point this out... the last time we saw Charles IN THE FLESH in game, was Escape from Ravenhearst, which was NINE YEARS AGO, likely TEN by the time Crossfade comes out. Happy Tenth Anniversary of your wedding, Master Detective? 8D

MD: AS IF.

#Mystery Case files #The Harbinger #MCF

12 notes · View notes

ogamagirl · 4 years

Photo

art summary time baybeeee

I don’t think I need to note again how difficult a year this was ;;; art is a huge source of comfort for me but looking through my folder for this, there were definitely huge swaths of time where all I could manage was sketches...that being said, there was a piece for every month that I still liked a lot (for some months it was even hard to choose!) - usually when I go back and do these summaries the early months make me cringe a bit, but I’m still pretty happy with each piece I chose here TuT and compared to last year’s I feel like I definitely kept improving this year! I think I got a bit better at coloring? I tried more stuff to evoke the mood I wanted through colors and I feel like I learned some useful tricks to keep in my arsenal. So! Let’s hope! 2021 is a nicer year than this one was overall, but when it comes to art...I think I’m pretty happy. <3

#Erin makes art #feel the love with your soul #cauSE THAT'S MOST OF WHAT I DREW LOL i'm past apologizing for focusing on me and soul when it comes to art #(i never needed to apologize in the first place)#ANYWAY #art summary 2020

5 notes · View notes

musicollage · 4 years

Photo

Atlas Sound. Logos, 2009. Kranky (USA) / 4AD (UK). ( Lyrics & Music – Bradford Cox ) ~ [ Album Review | 1) Pitchfork + 2) Pop Matters + 3) Drowned In Sound + 4) NME + 5) Prefix Magazine ]

1) As we've gotten to know Bradford Cox over the last couple of years through shows, interviews, and blog posts, one of the Deerhunter frontman's most appealing qualities is his deep and nuanced appreciation of the music of others. Some musicians listen to records to see how they work, check out the competition, or trawl for ideas; by all available evidence, Cox feels records, deeply. If he was born without musical gifts and couldn't sing or play an instrument, one can imagine him working at a record store, amassing an enviable collection while driving people on a message board crazy with the sureness of his detailed opinions. Whatever you think of his exploits as an indie rock media figure, Cox's music fandom is easy to identify with and also offers a portal into his own work.

Atlas Sound, Cox's solo alias, in one sense serves as a sort of laboratory for figuring out what makes some his favorite music tick, away from the expectations of his main band. Two collaborations on Logos, the second Atlas Sound full-length, are excellent examples of how music listening can be absorbed into original work. First is "Walkabout", a track Cox wrote and recorded with Noah Lennox from Animal Collective, whom Cox got to know during a European tour. Though Cox's music shades dark and Lennox's is often flecked with uncertainty and doubt, "Walkabout" is the sunniest pop tune of either of their careers. Coasting on a buoyant, twinkling keyboard sample, it is a starkly catchy and irresistible, a clattery post-millennial Archies tune that straddles perfectly the border between simple and simplistic. Interestingly, it also sounds very much like a Panda Bear tune.

Then there is Lætitia Sadier of Stereolab, who wrote the lyrics and sings lead on Logos' "Quick Canal". The song opens with some gorgeously textured organ chords and soon a steady-state beat and drums rise up in the mix, setting the kind of relaxed-but-propulsive neo-krautrock scene that Stereolab perfected very early on. Here Cox gets to play the part of the late Mary Hansen, adding "la-di-da" trills behind Sadier as she intones phrases in her unfailingly lovely, for-the-ages voice. He even throws in a "Jenny Ondioline"-style rupture about halfway through, sending the track into a breathtaking shoegaze section for its final four minutes, wherein it floats magisterially on a pillow of shifting guitar feedback. "Quick Canal" is almost nine minutes long and it doesn't waste a second.

On these tracks, the confidence Cox shows in melting his aesthetic into the soundworld of other musicians is striking-- both are unqualified successes, very different from each other but among the best things Cox has ever done. But they also sound a lot like the music his collaborators are known for. Cox's sympathetic support and sense of how to construct songs with others suggests a desire to expand the parameters of what Atlas Sound can be. And given his willingness to let others take the microphone on an Atlas Sound project on these cuts, I can't help but go back to Cox's words on Logos before the album was released, which suggested that this was to be less introverted and that was "not about me."

And then I remember that the cover of the album consists of a photo of Cox with his shirt off and the lyrics in the first two songs start with the word "I", which suggests that we probably shouldn't take these statements very seriously. While the songs may or may not be "about" Cox in the strictest sense, the overall vibe is at least as introverted as 2008's Let the Blind Lead Those Who Can See But Cannot Feel, and every note bears the same signature. With its strummed guitars, hushed double-tracked vocals, and tunes more reliant on ambiance and feel than melody or rhythm, Logos feels every bit as diaristic and personal, but with Cox, that's a plus. At this point, we're not looking to this guy for commentary on the outside world; we want to hear him wrestle with private demons in the sanctuary of his bedroom, bathing every sound in reverb to give the illusion of space and as a sonic balm against loneliness and figuring out how to make music as affecting as the stuff he loves to listen to.

So tracks like "The Light That Failed", "An Orchid", and "My Halo" (the latter two, though different in tone, are further entries in Cox's growing line of melancholy waltz-time shuffles) function primarily as the kind of eerie, blown-out mood music he has become very good at. They are amorphous sketches that still manage to convey feeling, capturing the sort of sad, exhausted, and fragile emotional state that is Cox's area of expertise. "Shelia", a taut pop song with a great chorus hook, is a change-up, though the repeating refrain "No one wants to die alone" fits with the rest of the record's themes. And "Washington School", with its dissonant chime of metallic percussion that sound like gamelan or evilly out-of-tune steel drums, contains the record's most interesting production, with thick drones reminiscent of Tim Hecker and menacing rhythm track.

So some things are different, some are the same, but all of it works well together. It's true that every time Cox ventures out of his comfort zone on Logos, you wish that he'd go even further and embrace extremes-- of tunefulness, tradition, noise-- that don't necessarily come to him naturally. He may yet take a big leap with Atlas Sound, but here the steps away, though rewarding, are tentative. For the rest of the record, Logos feels familiar and assuring, another affecting dispatch from a corner of indie music that is increasingly starting to seem like one Cox pretty much owns.

2) Take a quick gander at Deerhunter's discography and you'll notice a clear stylistic trajectory. From the confrontational noise of "Turn It Up Faggot" to the ambient preoccupations of Cryptograms to the straight-up indie-pop of Microcastle/Weird Era Cont., it's plain to see that as the band has evolved over time, its songwriting has increasingly tended toward the more accessible end of the spectrum. Unsurprisingly, it appears that Bradford Cox's other songwriting vehicle, Atlas Sound, is following a similar arc. On Logos, his second album under the Atlas Sound moniker, Cox provides us with 11 songs that are far less insular, though no less dreamy, than those he has penned in the past. While his fractured compositions still evoke the myth of the bedroom pop auteur, the songs on Logos sound considerably more refined than the lo-fi sketches being churned out by many of his peers. This, as it turns out, is a very good thing.

To wit: "Walkabout", the track that had the blogosphere buzzing with anticipation for the better part of the summer. Built around a squelchy organ sample lifted from the Dovers "What Am I Going to Do", the song simultaneously recalls both the acid-tinged psychedelia of Black Moth Super Rainbow and the technicolor pop of Brian Wilson. Of course, it's impossible to mention "Walkabout" without acknowledging its co-creator, Noah Lennox, a.k.a. Panda Bear. In many ways, "Walkabout" bears Lennox's fingerprints more than it does Cox's, with Lennox's wistful vocal harmonies echoing throughout the track's four-minute runtime. It's easy to see why Cox chose to leak "Walkabout" well in advance of the release of Logos; bright, bubbly and infinitely catchy, the song perfectly captures the mood of a fleeting summer afternoon and stands as one of the year's best singles.

"Walkabout" is obviously a standout, though it's also an outlier when approached within the context of Logos. While some may feel as if they've been misled, the good news is that the rest of the album is no less rewarding, if not quite as instantly gratifying. Take, for example, the opening suite that leads up to "Walkabout". Pitting disjointed acoustic guitar strums and distant, reverb-soaked vocals against a backdrop of aqueous noise, "The Light That Failed" succeeds at drawing the listener in while still keeping her at arm's length. "An Orchid", meanwhile, presents the listener with a dreamy ballad that feels like an indistinct outline for a Deerhunter song. Cox's vocals and the song's guitar hook are buried just deep enough in the mix to force the listener to dig a little. When "Walkabout" finally hits, it feels like a reward well earned.

Luckily, "Walkabout" isn't the only nugget of pure pop bliss to be found on Logos. "Shelia", a disarmingly straightforward slice of jangly college-rock, proves hard to shake, with its Pixies-esque melody and sun-bleached three-part harmonies. Lyrically, the song serves as a world-weary rejoinder to the sweetly nostalgic refrain of "Walkabout" ("What did you want to be / When you grew up"), with Cox explaining, "No one wants / To die alone", before promising the song's titular subject, "We'll die alone / Together." It sure goes down easy, though.

Cox has publicly acknowledged that Stereolab were his favorite band in high school, so it should come as no surprise that given the opportunity to collaborate with Lætitia Sadier, he puts his best foot forward. On "Quick Canal", he lovingly builds up and tears down a cathedral of sound for Sadier to inhabit, layering a deep bass groove, tambourine hits and a wall of gently panning organs atop a steady, shuffling beat. Midway through, the song falls apart, briefly taking a detour into glitchy noise before giving way to a squall of fuzzed-out guitars. Try as Cox might to obfuscate the vocals, however, Sadier's voice proves indefatigable. To her credit, she sounds right at home here, bouncing her voice off of the song's jagged edges to produce a track that's equal parts haunting and triumphant.

With regard to electronic composition, on Logos Cox sounds more confident than ever before. Samples and electronic instrumentation form the underpinnings of many of the album's songs, though not to conspicuous effect. Penultimate track "Washington School" illustrates this point better than perhaps any other on the album. Opening with a loop built from fragments of a minor key piano line, the song soon piles on a pounding, bass-heavy beat, chimes and a playful synth line, blossoming into a full-on folktronica number that recalls Four Tet circa Rounds. Somewhere in the distance, Cox's disembodied voice rings out: "Shine a light / On me."

If Let the Blind Lead Those Who Can See But Cannot Feel was the product of Cox's willful isolation, then Logos is the sound of the auteur stepping outside of his bedroom to engage the world outside. Though it cedes little of the hazy delivery that made Let the Blind… so compelling, Logos brims with a wide-eyed energy all its own, conveying a palpable sense of optimism that's all too rare in Cox's oeuvre. This isn't too surprising when one considers the circumstances; the path that led Cox to the album's creation -- globetrotting tours with his idols, collaborations with some of the most distinctive voices in indie rock -- is the stuff of dreams for hermetic music nerds. Perhaps that's why Logos sounds as vibrant as it does: it's the result of Bradford Cox living out his dreams rather than just dreaming them.

3) One of many unsatisfactory things about end-of-decade retrospectives is that musicians are rarely so accommodating as to plot their careers in nice, convenient ten year cycles. Nonetheless, that’s how posterity tends to remember them, regardless of finer details. Thus the Kinks are Sixties artists, the Clash a Seventies act, Talk Talk an Eighties band, Nirvana from the Nineties, and you’d comfortably stick a punt on The Strokes and Sufjan Stevens ending up defined by this decade we’re exiting.

But what of Bradford Cox? Even if you were aware of Deerhunter's raucous 2005 debut ”Turn It Up Faggot” at the time, you're a wizard or a liar if you foresaw how their frontman was going to fill the years 2007 to 2009. That is to say: three Deerhunter albums (‘tis a fool indeed who views Weird Era Cont. as anything other than a record in its own right), two EPs, and a solo project as Atlas Sound that’s yielded God-know-how-many free downloads, as well as last year's Let The Blind Lead Those Who Can See But Cannot Feel, and now – an epic 22 months later - Logos. That all of this bar the odd freebie has been good to exemplary is simply astonishing, and points to an artist whose profligacy and cult popularity has him nicely set up to be a defining artist of the next decade.

And yet... anomalous as ”Turn It Up Faggot” may seem, such scabrous origins are indicative of a palette that has been cooling and quietening ever since Cox first intersected with the limelight. The soundbite-friendly ‘ambient punk’ aesthetic never really lasted beyond Cryptograms, with Microcastle canning the abrasiveness in favour of reasonably straightforward shoegaze set off with dreamlike Fifties flourishes. Having arrived at something like a commercial sound, another artist might have stopped there; however, Cox has ploughed right on through, this year’s Rainwater Cassette Exchange far and away Deerhunter’s most introverted work, a retreat into quiescent childhood reverie.

Logos has much more in common with Rainwater... than Let the Blind..., for the most part ditching the dissonant electronics in favour of delayed acoustic guitars and old-time pop structures. On the face of it, it sets out Atlas Sound’s stall as simply being whatever Cox may do sans Deerhunter. Yet in a way the 'ambient solo project' tag still kind of makes sense. Strictly speaking ambient music is defined not by instrumentation, but by its evasion of the consciousness. Whole swathes of Logos are blurred and indistinct - technically melodic, hooky songs treated and delivered in such a way that they all but self-negate, leaving nothing but fleeting impressions: the winsome viola that arrives in ‘Attic Lights’, just as Cox mutters ”maximum pain, maximum effect”; the gay singer’s unsettling yearning for traditional marriage on ‘Sheila’ ("we’ll die alone, together"); the barely discernible mantra ”all is love” that briefly ghosts through ‘Washington School’.

This might sound like a way of romanticising an unmemorable album, but that's far from the case. These songs are bunched together into two dreamy, fog-like passages that serve as a backdrop for a handful of the most tangible tunes Cox has ever written, soaring atmospherically above the misty dreampop. Opener ‘The Light That Failed’ roots itself in the consciousness through eerily torpid glitching, Cox’s disconcerting use of something approaching a falsetto, and the doomy langour of its titular lyric. It sets up an album that frequently drifts into disquieting areas, yet never quite follows through on this early moment of dread. Indeed, delightful Panda Bear hook up ‘Walkabout’ serves as definitive proof that the light hasn't failed at all. While much of Cox’s early pop obsession speaks of a desire to creep out of the now entirely, ‘Walkabout’ is far more tangible and good natured, thanks largely to Panda Bear’s high, comforting tones and the appropriation of the hook from actual vintage Sixties pop gem ‘What Am I Going To Do?’ by The Dovers. Ironically for a song built around a 40-year-old tune, nothing, else on Logos has ‘Walkabout’s immediacy, though the excellent title track comes close, a rattling Strokes-alike number slightly removed from the world by Cox’s arsenal of floaty FX.

As we’ve known ever since last year’s leak of the Logos demos, the centrepiece is the eight and a half minute, wholly electronic ‘Quick Canal’. Though tamed a little from the leaked 13 minute instrumental, this more mannered, Laetitia Sadier-sung incarnation is a better fit here, and still towers above the skyline. The Stereolab singer adds an inescapably Enya-ish quality to the gentle early stages, but by the time the song’s swooshing, snowy motorik has kicked into full gear she fits in immaculately, an aloof Old World passenger on a song charged with haughty European electronica. It perhaps doesn’t sound so jaw-dropping as it did in isolation, but a lot of that can be attributed to an intentional effect of the surroundings. Those short, subliminal songs serving to filter away reality and focus, like half remembered dreams that leaves the senses baffled and feverish.

Logos is a gorgeous, hallucinatory and somewhat sickly outing. While there's every chance he'll wrong foot us, and soon, this record is entirely in keeping with the increasingly self-erasing route Bradford Cox has taken as a musician; it's hard to stifle a shudder at that blanked out cover image. Maybe Cox will go on to be a star next decade - he's a gregarious, prolific man liked by critics. But listen to his music, and that doesn't feel quite right. Maybe he'll become an icon. Or maybe he’ll finally make his escape from our timestream entirely, leaving us to wonder if he was ever there at all.

4) Much like Starbucks, Bradford Cox has become a ubiquitous presence. What with his work with art-rock outfit Deerhunter, his involvement in Karen O’s official soundtrack for Where The Wild Things Are, and now this, his second solo offering under the Atlas Sound banner, you’d be forgiven for thinking that such familiarity will start to breed contempt. But you’d be way off the mark.

There are two things you should know about this unlikely lo-fi hero of gangly deportment (he has Marfan Syndrome, a genetic disorder that stretches his limbs and strains his heart) and a girlish speaking voice (the affliction for this is yet uncertain). Firstly, it is impossible to dislike him (just see Wayne Coyne’s spoof argument with him on YouTube, branding Cox a “dick”). Secondly, his creative output has proved him to be one of – if not the – most forward-thinking and inspiring musicians of our generation.

So, as Cox takes time out from Deerhunter, along comes ‘Logos’. Less of an experimental minefield than its predecessor, ‘Let The Blind Lead Those Who Can See But Cannot Feel’, it sees Cox weave in and out of dream-like sequences, such as the sombre ‘The Light That Failed’ and ‘Quick Canal’, the latter featuring the sweetly masculine vocal of [a]Stereolab[/a]’s Laetitia Sadier; while ‘An Orchid’ pitches in as the aural equivalent of a David Lynch storyboard, guided along with looped noises and whimsical vocals.

It’d be easy to overlook Cox’s lyrics when the soundscapes are this rich and ornate, but there’s a delicate exploration of the most human of sensibilities and yearnings on ‘Logos’. He opens up the emotional vaults on ‘Sheila’, pining softly that “no-one wants to die alone… we’ll die alone together”. Likewise with ‘My Halo’, where Cox reveals “My halo burned a hole in the sky/My halo burned a hole in the ground… so I wait for polarity to change”. There’s much warmth and playfulness to be found here too, the unfeigned honesty and childlish desires expressed on ‘Walkabout’ – featuring the falsetto of [a]Animal Collective[/a]’s Noah Lennox – with its lyric “What did you want to see?/What did you want to be when you grew up?” being a case in point.

Cox may have tagged Atlas Sound as just another side-project, but ‘Logos’ is a clear indication that his solo creative output is just as richly rewarding as what came before.

5) For a project originally started as a way for Deerhunter frontman Bradford Cox to give a voice to his despairing isolation (he records completely alone) as a teenager, Atlas Sound is starting to sound like an arena-filling, widescreen pop project. Logos, Cox’s second proper solo album, takes the dense, gray worlds of Let the Blind Lead Those Who Can See, But Cannot Feel and puts them through a rainbow, delivering a splendid album.

If there’s one word to describe Logos, it’s “watery.” And in that regard, Logos shares a lot in common with Merriweather Post Pavilion (and Deerhunter’s Rainwater Cassette Exchange from earlier this year). Both albums trade in dreamy avant-pop landscapes buoyed by soggy atmospherics. “Criminals” sways like a shipping vessel in choppy seas, while the album’s great closing third (“My Halo” through the title track) sounds like it was transmitted from that underwater base in the third season of Lost. Cox is still reliant on the general ambiance that envelops his solo work, but here he’s willing to let his vocals float above the mix. And while musically this is brighter, he’s still all Debbie Downer. Old standby lyrical tropes of growing old (on “Sheila” Cox sings “we will grow old” like he’s reassuring someone else), loneliness (“Attic Lights”) and lost hope (“The Light that Failed”) show up repeatedly, and he still sounds like he’s on his deathbed when he sings.

But for an album created largely by one guy alone in his room, the guest performances shine the most on Logos. Stereolab’s Lætitia Sadier wrote the lyrics for “Quick Canal,” a sprawling, shoegazey track that never loses its motorik motion, peaking repeatedly in its eight minutes. The bubbly “Walkabout,” the high-profile track with Animal Collective’s Panda Bear lives up to all the hypertext spilled about it this summer, delivering the best of both Panda Bear’s effervescent youthful innocence and Cox’s wistful yearning.

Logos, while just the second solo album from the frontman for a band of marginal fame, represents the latest and greatest chapter in Cox’s ride to indie stardom. He rose to prominence mid-decade as a confrontational trickster riding blog-hype (circa Cryptograms), continuing with a solo album to build his brand (Let the Blind), an indie-rock masterwork (Microcastle) and a solo album of nearly as high repute (Logos). As for what’s next, Cox has remained mum (though Deerhunter might be taking a hiatus), but with Logos, he ensures we’ll all be waiting.

#rock music #art rock #atlas sound #bradford cox #kranky #4ad #2009 #2000s #2000s rock #pitchfork #pop matters #drowned in sound #nme #prefix magazine #review

8 notes · View notes

nibscribs · 6 years

Photo

So uhhhh I drew a lot of RWBY this year... only two of these are non RWBY and tbh I could have just as easily put something RWBY for June Template

Retrospective under the cut bc it’s LONG

RETROSPECTIVE January: First piece of the year! I still like this piece and I think it shows how much I improved from the original version of it. Also I just like looking at it bc it's soft content of my rare pair. I do think I made the rose look photorealistic which looks... bad esp with all the other more stylized flowers, and I got lazy with the bleeding hearts by just drawing one set and flipping them. Emerald's hair also could look better. February: I made this around GNG week, which was a fun, good time, long before the server imploded on itself. I got really lazy with the backgrounds, obviously, but I do like the poses in this one, tho it helped that I based it off of screenshots from Young Justice. I also just really like how Merc looks in this one. March: March wasn't a very prolific month for art, I don't think I produced much besides this and one comic piece for GNG week. I'm not sure why exactly, I can't find any specific reason why I would be unproductive that month. I'm gonna just assume I was drained from work all the time and didn't have the energy to put out good art, and also I was getting into a slump bc all my art was starting to look same-y. This piece isn't very good, but I chose it because I did it without a reference, and at this point that was going out of my comfort zone. It's obviously not super dynamic, but at the very least you can tell I intended there to be motion to it. April: This also wasn't a very prolific month for art, not as bad as March, but for the same reasons. I was also really starting to feel burnout from the RWBY fandom, specifically wasps and conflict within the GNG server. This was also when the Art vs the Artist meme was popular, and I realized I didn't want to do that meme because my art was too similar and boring, which also brought me down a peg. Though I put out a few good chibis in April, I chose my Mercury redesign bc I was really proud of it. I could never get the Emerald redesign to mesh quite right, but I can say I'm really proud of how Mercury's came out. May: May had me bounce out of my art slump and in full force trying to expand my skills! Specifically exploring painting. Although May was about as prolific as April, what I did create I put a lot into. It was difficult to pick between this and my app of Edison, because I'm really proud of both, but in the end I went with this commission of Mercury because I pushed myself to try and use an interesting perspective for the piece instead of my usual stand still and face the camera pose. Because I pushed myself out of my comfort zone, this was one of the best things I made all year, and may be my favorite piece of the year. June: TIME TO STRESS OUT ABOUT CONNECTICON! So if you follow me on twitter, you might have noticed I made a lot of posts at the beginning of the year low key throwing shade at myself for drawing my oc's instead of more "important" art. Well, that important art that I was procrastinating was con merch, and con was the second week of July, so I really had to get my ass in gear to finish merch on time (spoiler, I didn't finish a lot of it on time). This piece and July's piece are both posters I made for Connecticon, and while I like July's much better, that doesn't mean I find this piece bad. I really should have known that no one at con would realize it was a goonies reference tho -_-; I also lost a lot of love for this piece after season 6 of Voltron, which I watched while I was about 60% of the way through this piece, so I had to force myself to finish it. July: I love this piece!!!! Don't get me wrong, I know it has flaws, but look at it! The lines are so crisp, the colors look good, Roman and Merc's expressions are mwuah chefs kiss, and I just love all of them!!! ... except for Neo. I really didn't do her justice in this piece, her hair is too fluffy, her head is way to oversized to the point that she looks like a bobblehead, and her eyes are too close together. Really if you take out Neo's head that whole problem goes away. I also love all the tiny details I put in this one, from emerald's chaps to roman's rose to Neo's lace parasol. You can tell I was way more passionate about this piece than I was about the Voltron piece. August: pretty sure this is when I quit my job cashiering, and thank god bc customers suck. If I was going off of sheer popularity, Chibi Pyrrha would have taken this slot no contest, and while I love chibi Pyrrha, I don't think it was the best of the month. I chose this little princess and the pauper au doodle because I tried a year ago to draw these two dancing, and it looked like dog shit. It was flat and ugly. But this has motion to it, and even looking at it now makes me feel warm and happy inside. It's just a good cute drawing of my otp. September: My piece for the RWBY tarot project! I have a lot of mixed emotions about this one. on the one hand, I love how mercury looks, his expression, the lighting, the visceral gore from his legs (ESPECIALLY THE VISCERAL GORE ON HIS LEGS) and the hands of the undead, all look stunning and I don't think I could be more happy with how they turned out. And then we get to the background. The caduceus isn't the worst thing ever, but it's severely lacking in quality compared to the rendering on mercury in front of it, and a lot of it is clearly pixellated from me trying to stretch and squash it just right. And the fire is a hot (no pun intended) mess. It's flat, incoherent, and doesn't lead the eye anywhere. It's a shame too because I wanted to do more with it, but I a) didn't have enough time or patience to figure out what I needed to do to fix it and b) didn't want to go outside of my comfort level, so I gave up and decided to be satisfied with what I had. October: October was another good month for art, I made a turnaround sheet for Moss, painted a full body (and slightly lewd) Rudy, and made a decent attempt at inktober. Ok, so I got like 2 days in, but I improved a lot on inking from last year! Fun fact! this piece was originally going to be fan art of Lindsay Jones, but after I did some thumbnails to figure out a pose, I thought it would suit White Diamond better, and I could also sell it as merch. I love this piece. I think I captured the sinister mood well, and conveyed the story I wanted to without any dialogue (at least the notes on Tumblr make me assume I did a decent job, lotta people really wigged out lol) I really worked hard to get the lighting right on this one, and I think it shows. My absolutely favorite thing about this piece funnily enough, is Amethyst. I think I just did a great job drawing her and I'm proud of myself ok. Stevens bubble and my trouble figuring out how to get WD's leg just right are the only things that I dislike about this piece, but I might go back and fix those. November: IM SO PROUD OF THIS COMMISSION!!!!!! I worked so god damn hard on this chef's kiss poifect, and it really shows. I started using a new brush at this point, the Ojing series on Clip Studio Paint, which I recommend and have been using a lot since. I've also been using this shading technique since drawing this. I love how it sort of fades out but it's still really crisp. I also love all the little details that give this piece character, like her shoes and the stripes on her jacket. This piece really takes a lot of the stuff I learned over the year and combines it into one piece, and I could not be prouder of it. I have absolutely no problems with this one, though I do find the weapon a bit plain, but it's what the client described. December: AND NOW IT'S CHRISTMAS!!!!! I had been working on this piece since August, going back to it every now and then and getting frustrated. I'm really glad I came back to it and finally finished it, since I love this pair and I put a lot of effort into it back in August. However, I'm also really glad I completely overhauled a lot of it, specifically the flowers. Though I'm not 100% happy with the mums in this one, they look a thousand times better than the mums I had originally sketched back in August, and were part of the reason I had such a hard time finishing this for months. I also thought it would be nice to end the year on the same note it started; with a flower couple. I've definitely learned a lot since January, and I hope to continue growing in 2019! 2019 GOALS!

Work on backgrounds for the love of god

Draw more stuff that isn't RWBY

Perspective

Make more speed paints and post more to youtube in general

#2018 summary of art #2018 retrospective #art progress #year in review #not art

14 notes · View notes

sweet-child-of-the-paradise-city · 7 years

Note

ASK ME QUESTIONS!?: 4, 6, 8, 24, 54, 88, 89, 91. HAPPY ASK LIST: Pink, Journal, Waves, Waterfalls. OCEAN ASK: Sails, Shells, Waves, Seafoam, Sea Glass, Nymph, Shipwreck. DEEP GET TO KNOW YOU QUESTIONS: 2, 8, 9, 13, 18. ASK ME SOME STUFF: 2, 12, 21, 24, 36. GET TO KNOW THE BLOGGER: 6, 8, 9, 12, 15, 18, 47, 49, 51, 57, 59, 65, 98, 144. Hopefully these will keep you busy :)

ASK ME SOME QUESTIONS!? -4: What's something you really want right now? - To be completely done with university and to have a stable job.6: Do you like the beach? - Honestly, I haven't spent enough time on beaches to really have an opinion. I like being by the seaside but not necessarily on the beach.8: What's the background of your cell? - The home screen is a sketch of autumn leaves and the lock screen is a small cassette tape that says 'for Will' with 'should I stay or should I go' written above/below it. (I'm so excited for Stranger Things season2!)24: Is there a certain quote you live by? - I don't necessarily live by it, but I like the quote from John Lennon about when he grows up he wants to be happy. Because that's what I want, I don't care what I'm doing as long as I'm happy.54: What was the last beverage you spilled on yourself? - It was only last night, and it was water. I'd filled my water bottle up too much.88: If someone gave you $1,000 to burn a butterfly over a candle, would you? - Well they'd have to force me to hold the butterfly first, but once they have then yeah, I probably would. It sounds mean and I wouldn't hurt a person for it. But I could do so much with that money, and it's only one small butterfly.89: What is something you wish you had more of? - Confidence. I'm a shy and nervous person. I go red when talking to new people, I shake more than usual, I go quiet, my heart beats super fast and I feel like I'm perspiring way more than I am. I get embarrassed easily too. It's taken me up to now to sing in front of my family when a song I like is on the radio. 91: Do you sleep with your window open? - In the summer I sleep with my window on the latch so it's cracked open a little to let fresh air in. Other than that I don't open it. HAPPY ASK LIST - Pink: Sunsets or sunrises - I'm not a morning person so definitely not sunrises. I like sunsets when the sky turns a mix of oranges, pinks and purples. It's beautiful.Journal: Would you dye your hair if you had the opportunity? Why or why not? - I would, I would like to try something new but I don't know what colour I would choose (except orange, never again!).Waves: Is there one music genre you can't listen to? Country... I do have several songs that's can be considered country/folksy but as a genre it's not so great. Jazz and classical are iffy too, some songs are really good but if I was forced to listen to them for the rest of my life I'd probably go insane. Waterfalls: Describe your perfect date? - Disclaimer,I've never been on a date so this is purely what I'd like: comfy on the couch watching favourite tv series or films with take out. Or long drives to no where in particular with favourite music playing. OCEAN ASK -Sails: Describe your perfect partner? - So for starters I don't have a type. All the crushes I've had vary. But the person does need to be kind and not afraid of their emotions. Political views must be similar to my own. If the person is sexist, racist, homophobic or discriminatory or anyone LGBTQ+ then they definitely don't have a chance.Shells: Would you prefer to be a vampire or a werewolf? - A vampire. I can stay young forever and I don't have to worry about what I look like.Waves: Favourite season and why? - Spring! It's not too warm and it's not too cold. Flowers start blossoming then too and they have me happy.Seafoam: Describe your ideal summer vacation? - So this summer I went on a road trip, of sorts, around Scotland and I loved it. I'd like to do that again around lots of countries in the world.Sea Glass: What do you consider to be your best physical feature? - My eyes? I like the colour of my eyes and my eye lashes are pretty long so I think they look nice. The rest of me isn't too fantastic.Nymph: Old-fashioned or modern decor? - How old are we talking? Because if it's 1920s Art Deco then definitely old-fashioned. Shipwreck: I don't have an OC. I'd like to try and write something but I'm not a very creative person so I don't know where I'd start.DEEP GET TO KNOW YOU QUESTIONS -2: Are you religious? If yes, what is your religion? - Technically, I'm christened Catholic and I was brought up in Roman Catholic/Catholic school but at the age of 7 I lost someone very close to me and from then on I've firmly atheist. But I can understand why people are religious.8: Do you believe in second chances? - I do depending on what has first happened. Say someone has killed in self defence, then they should get a second chance. But if the person has killed purely for no reason at all, then they should not get a second chance. 9: What is one thing that people always misunderstand about you? - That I'm always in a mood because I have a resting bitch face. If you see me and I look pissed, chances are I'm not.13: Does the most important person in you life know how much they mean to you? - I'd hope so.18: What would you do differently if you knew no one would judge you? - I'd sing along when songs I like came on the radio/iPod and maybe dance a little too (again, it's an anxiety thing).ASK ME SOME STUFF -2: What would you name your future kids? - For a boy I like the names Jonah and Adam. For a girl I'm not too sure.12: What is something you want right now? - To be in Edinburgh already! (By the time you read this I'll probably be there, but right now I'm still 2 hours out).21: Age and birthday? - My birthday is 12th March 1998, I'm 19 years old.24: Height? - I'm 5'3" (I don't know what that is in meters)36: 3 dreams you want to fulfill? - I want to graduate university, I want to have a good job, and I want to have a happy life.GET TO KNOW THE BLOGGER -6: What fictional place would you like to visit? - Probably Westeros because most other fictional stuff I like is set in real places (but life before Game of Thrones started because there are a few characters I'd like to save).8: When was the last time you climbed a tree? - Last time was probably when I was 12/13.9: If you could turn any activity into an Olympic sport, What would you have a good chance of winning a model for? - Sleeping, or sleeping in. I can sleep almost anywhere, and I'm great at not getting up early if I don't have to. And I don't mean like sleeping in till 9/10am, I'm talking noon/1pm/2pm.12: What skill would you like to master? - Playing the guitar? Or just talking to people without having mini panic attacks.15: What's your favourite drink? - A drink that comes from Scotland called Irn Bru. I also really love Vanilla Coke/Pepsi! 18: What game or movie universe would you like to live in? - I would like to live in either the Star Trek or Star Wars universe.47: What is the most annoying question people ask you? - This is going to sound stupid but its 'Is (insert film title here) out on the internet yet?'. My parents ask me this all the time, and it's always for movies they know either aren't out or have only just been released at the cinemas. And they know that there's a very slim chance a good copy will be on the internet. 49: If you were the dictator on a small island nation, what crazy dictator stuff would you do? - I don't know if I'd do anything crazy because I'm a pretty fair person. But I'd have a certain laws in place: don't litter, don't spit on the ground, if you're racist/sexist/etc then you will be kicked off the island.51: Would you rather go hand gliding or whitewater rafting? - Well, I'm afraid of heights and I can't swim. But I think I'll chose hand gliding because I've heard that drowning isn't very nice, and if I fall to my death it'll be over quicker.57: What's something you've been meaning to try but haven't got around to it? - Root beer! A certain supermarket near me sells it along with lots of other tasty looking American snacks/drinks and I really want some but I keep forgetting. Also, beef jerky...59: What piece of entertainment do you wish you could erase from your mind, only to experience it for the first time again? - There's A couple things. There's the first time I saw a Star Wars movie in a cinema, the first time I watched Band of Brothers and Generation Kill, and my first run though of Uncharted: Lost Legacy and Watchdogs 2. I'd love to experience them all for the first time again. 65: What fad or trend do you think should come back? - All the fads and trends that come to mind are awful (flares and platform boots being a couple) but I really like the fashion from the 1950s/1960s. I think we should bring it back. 98: What's the dumbest thing you've done that actually turned out well? - I've done a lot of dumb things but none of them have turned out well. 144: Why would you be annoying as a roommate? - If I don't really know the other person/people, then I'm really quiet and awkward. But if I do know the other people then I don't think I'd be annoying.Thank you for the asks!! :) It kept be very busy! (I'm sorry if you can't read this properly, I can't bold or anything -_-)

3 notes · View notes

sylvaetria · 7 years

Text

Richtor’s FAQ

This is very long overdue (and also just very long).

This post, and any subsequent FAQ posts, will be tagged as #faq for mobile access, and I will display the tag and a link to this post in my blog description. I will also be making a page for this on my blog, and maybe reblog it at intervals for exposure.

Please read this thoroughly before asking me any questions or sending any messages. I will redirect some questions (not all) to the FAQ if the answer is there; otherwise, they will be deleted.

Updated: July 14th, 2017

Personal

What pronouns do you use?

They / them, please!

Do you mind if we call you by your birth name?

If you know it, not particularly - most people do. It’s not a matter of being triggered or feeling dysphoria if I’m not called Richtor, it’s just personal preference.

Spells and Resources

Do you have any spells / resources for _____?

Have you checked these lists?

[FAQ and Resource Masterlist]

[Spell and Sigil Masterlist]

Have you looked through my tagging system?

Have you searched my blog via the search function?

If you have not answered “yes” to all those questions, please do so before sending me any requests for spells, resources, or lists.

Half the time, I already have lists for what is being asked for, which are readily available to those that take the time look for them. I promise you, you will likely find the stuff faster if you look for it on your own, instead of waiting whatever amount of time it takes for me to see your ask, compile the links, then answer your ask.

Most of the links I provide are things that I find on my blog - I search my own blog to provide the resources you ask for. It is all already there.

What is _____ used for?

Have you searched my blog for that answer?

Have you checked Google for that answer?

Most of these messages are able to be Google’d. Sometimes I *do* Google them myself, just to try to prove a point. Especially when phrased such as “uses for _____” (which are pretty impersonal and don’t make me feel nice btw, I’m not an answer machine).

Commonly, in regards to crystals and herbs, typing “metaphysical properties of _____” into Google will help you find what you are looking for.

What does _____ term mean?

Same as above.

If I can use Google to find the answer, why don’t you just do it for me?

Because it isn’t my job to do so. Because I don’t believe I should spoon feed people these types of answers anymore, when they’re already so readily available. Because it is promoting more and more of those types of questions, and I am not very happy to answer them anymore.

Because I believe it is important that magic users know how to do research on their own, and to actually do so; to me, it is a super important and personal part of the craft, and I don’t believe there will be a lot of growth if you are not putting any effort into it yourself.

The bottom line is - I have allowed a certain type of behavior on this blog go on for far too long, and that is my own error. I should’ve been a bit more severe on my boundaries, but I wasn’t, and now a lot of people expect certain behavior and questions answered of me.

Now, however, I am putting my own boundaries as a person first before my desires for this blog, and even that is still before those that follow this blog. Basically, I’ll do what I want on my own blog, because it is my blog; what I offer to do is up to me, what I actually do is up to me.

This list has broken links, will you fix them?

Eventually, I’m sure.

What do we do in the meantime?

Use what is already there; I make my lists as full as I do in case stuff like this happens, so you still have options.

You can search for that post on my blog, it most likely will be on there. If not, go to Google, type “site:tumblr.com [name of post] [old blog name of poster],” and generally that pulls up some reblogs of that post on other blogs.

Asks and Submissions

Why have you not answered my question?

Does it fall into the list of [Questions I Will Not Answer]? If so, that may be why.

Otherwise, I may have found the content too triggering to post, or I was otherwise uncomfortable answering it or posting it. That list is not extensive, and there are lots of other things I find myself not comfortable answering.

I may not be on Tumblr when your ask gets sent, and therefore it won’t get responded to right away. I also have other things to do outside this blog, and may be busy.

There are some circumstances where I am on mobile, and I need to wait for desktop access to provide a proper answer and/or resources.

Sometimes I don’t have an answer to give; in these cases I may try to redirect you to other blogs, or ask my followers to provide advice if they can, but depending on the ask’s nature (i.e., if it can be triggering), I may just delete it.

I also have had instances of missing asks - where someone sends in a three part ask and I only get one and three - I won’t answer those sorts of things unless I have all the pieces. Tumblr is notorious for eating asks; I may not have gotten it in the first place.

There are cases where I’m just not in the mood to talk about something, so I won’t. Sometimes I try to leave it for later; if I know I will never get around to answering it, it just gets deleted.

Why do you just delete stuff you don’t want to answer?

Because it is still my blog, my ask box - I still have control over it and decide what I answer and what I post.

Aren’t you a resource blog? Don’t you *have* to help us?

No I am not a resource blog, not by my own definition. My blog was never made for it to be a resource for other people, ever. It may have become that, sure, but that was never my desire or intention. I have always used my blog as a way for me to gather information I care to know about, for my purposes; the fact that other people get use out of it too is just a side effect.

I never once bound myself to answering every question I got. I may try to help, yes, and am glad to in most situations, and while I may offer something I am still free to retract that offer whenever I wish. I am not obligated to answer asks. Again, this is still *my” blog, first and foremost. I am not getting paid to be here, I am doing what I do for free, at the cost of my own time and energy; ultimately I decide how I spend it in the end.

Why don’t you post asks you’re not comfortable answering, with messages saying so?

Because it clogs the dash, for one thing. I honestly don’t really care to either. Why would I post it if it still makes me uncomfortable? I do not need to justify that for anyone, or provide reasons for not doing so.

I am going to send you asks, asking why I haven’t been answered!

Okay, but I’m deleting them.

I am going to resend you my ask in the messaging system!

You really think pestering me to give you an answer is going to get you your answer faster? No; it’s just going to give you a snippy response, if one at all.

Can you open your submit box so we can share you things?

Sadly, no. I have had unsavory things sent to my submission box in the past, so it will never be open again.

Requests

Are sigil / spell / tarot reading requests open?

No; they have not been for a while, honestly.

If they are, I will make a post about it, change the information in my blog description, as well as the text for the ask box.

Trust me, when they are open, you will know.

Can I send a request in now for you to get to when they are open?

Nope, I don’t pre-book slots. These will just be deleted, as I feel it’s pretty disrespectful to still send in requests for a future time when they’re closed.

What if I miss the next time you have them open?

If you care that much about getting something done by me, you can receive notifications on mobile for when I post, so you would not miss the post saying I am taking requests for such things again.

Or, you know, regularly visit my blog to see.

I know your requests are closed but it’s an emergency, can you help?

I will likely send you to someone else who has similar services open.

You said requests are closed, but you still did something for so-and-so?

Yep, because I chose to; I decided I wanted to do that and so I did it. I will choose who I offer my services to, when I want to, and will not be made to feel guilty or bad for denying it when I don’t want to or feel able to do so.

I don’t think you guys understand - last time I opened requests, for maybe half an hour, I got over thirty of them. Sigils take about a half hour for me to do, from first sketches to digital format. That is over 15 hours of work, that I offer to do for free, on top of whatever else I may have going on in my life. I often can’t keep up with the amount of requests that come in, which is why they often stay closed.

Why don’t you do a limit to the number of requests?

It is something I am thinking of doing, yes, but it will still be when I feel up to doing so, and not a moment sooner.

Promos and Casting Spells

Can you do a promo for me?

Depends - have we ever interacted before outside of you asking me to promo you?

If “no,” then I will most likely not promo you.

Why not?

Because I don’t know you, and you’re basically asking a stranger if you can use their follower count as exposure for your own biz. I don’t appreciate my blog trying to be used as advertising, particularly if you have never interacted with me before on Tumblr.

If your first and only time talking to me is to ask for a promo, I am not going to be very inclined to do that for you.

Regardless, I still post what I want on my own blog, and sometimes I’m just not in the mood.

You reblogged a promo post for this person!

Yep, because I chose to - that was my decision to make for what I wanted on my blog, and I made it.

Most likely, these people are my friends, and we’ve talked beforehand and I’ve *offered* to do that for them; they don’t ask me.

Will you cast spells for me?

Same as above.

I have limited energy to do the things I need to in my own life. Sometimes I need to conserve what I have to do what I need to do - I can’t go around casting spells for every person that asks.

You offered to do a spell for this person!

Yep, because that was my own choice - I decided I wanted to. I will not be guilt tripped or forced into doing something I don’t want to do.

I have made a post about this [here].

Other Blog Biz

Will you put long posts under a “read more” cut?

Not likely - in the instance of my blog ever being deleted, most things under “read more” disappear forever. I want my information to remain intact in case of accidental (or otherwise) deletion.

On desktop, you can hit the “J” key to skip past an entire post. I also tag long posts as such on my blog, and Xkit has a blacklist option which can be used to filter those posts.

For mobile, well I’m sorry, you’re just gonna have to scroll for a few seconds.

I use “read more” cuts for personal matters or trigger warnings, not for long posts.

For now, that is all, although I am sure I will be editing this and adding more to it as time goes by.

#faq #Richtor's faq #richtors faq #long post

40 notes · View notes

whereintheworldisclairerans-blog · 7 years

Text

Heyyyyyyyy

WOW Sorry it’s been so long you guys! I’m currently sitting in my now 100% furnished and decorated apartment in Madrid, listening to the numerous buses and people talking to each other in the street in Spanish and I couldn’t be happier. I’ve been here a little more than a week now and it’s starting to feel like I’m here to stay. Just in time for me to leave again! Ha. We’ll get there though. So very much catching up to do, I don’t even know where to begin. Probably where I left off would be good, would’t it? That would be... Hamburg? I think so.

Our direct train did, in fact, end up being a direct train *hooray*. Jordan and I were both extremely productive and sketched a plan for my apartment (which ended up being pretty accurate) and wrote out goals, aspirations, etc. After waiting outside of our AirBnb for a while because we didn’t know which doorbell to ring, we found ourselves living in the land of luxury with a.... wait for it.... KING SIZE BED. After sharing full size beds (and/or mattress on the floor or just straight up floor) for the month, it was pretty exciting to starfish out and each have plenty of room. We made our typical dinner of pasta and wine and each hung out on our respective social medias, got caught up on emails, etc. We woke up around noon the next day and decided to treat ourselves to brunch. Jordan, being the TripAdvisor master of the trip, found us the perfect little place that was a brunch BUFFET. I honestly don’t know why more brunch places at home aren’t like that. You pay for the plate and a drink and then you just pick whatever you want. You can eat and eat and eat and ITS AMAZING. After stuffing ourselves to the brim, we decided to walk it off and spent the day rambling through the city center. It was lovely because Hamburg reminded us both remarkably of Denver, just with a lot more water. There was very similar architecture and the general vibe just felt like home. It was simultaneously comforting and a little bit heartbreaking, given that I don’t know when I will be home next. *cries a little* We decided to go shopping for some warmer layers, and I mooned over a backpack in an outdoors store. Which, despite the best efforts of the salesman, I did not end up buying. We ended the afternoon in yet another gorgeous park with warm chocolate and banana crepes before walking the three miles back to our AirBnb. That night, we decided to double check the check-in time of our reservation for Berlin, hoping that we could go into the city earlier to make the most out of our time there. And it was then that we had our first and only issue with any booking or accommodation. The AirBnb host in Berlin had canceled our reservation the day after we booked it (several weeks earlier) and we were never notified. So in a scramble, we had to book another one, that ended up being way farther outside of the city and nearly twice the cost. (AirBnb has compensated me a little, but to say it was inconvenient would be an understatement). We couldn’t check into Berlin until 4pm, so we decided to hit the brunch place again the next morning and properly stuffed ourselves before getting on the train.

And what a train ride it was. German trains are such a joke. We had become quite the pros at arriving on time, finding seats together and getting settled before departure. This time, however, the train just continued to sit there and sit there. We didn’t care, we had music and seats and that was all that mattered. Until everyone started to leave the train. We rolled our eyes, cringed and prepared for another travel day like the one from Zurich to Cologne. Luckily though, we asked the people next to us what was going on. They explained that the train route had been changed and that it was no longer going to the Berlin Central Station, but to the West Station. If we wanted to, we could run with the other 500000 people to catch a train leaving in 5 minutes, or we could stay on this one and arrive slightly later. SURPRISE we stayed on the nearly empty train, which ended up going to the central station anyways. Suckers. We did, however, get in much later than we had anticipated and we had booked tickets to this film festival that one of Jordan’s favorite bands did the score for. So we hustled to the AirBnb, dropped all of our stuff and then immediately left again to the complete opposite side of town. We followed the hipsters from the train, to the bus, to this cool set of warehouses, where we arrived half an hour late but nothing had started yet. Beers and popcorn in hand, we chatted with a super nice Spanish girl for a while before taking our seats to watch the movies. The theme for the night was on politics, with a specific focus on the nuclear bomb, so the first movie was Dr. Strangelove and the second was a documentary called The Bomb. 10/10 would recommend seeing both. It was very powerful and a cool experience. The next day was the day we had been waiting for the whole trip, the only thing that we had booked before we left, the Moderat concert! It ended up being Jordan’s big hipster day out, that started with her getting a tattoo, then some kombucha (and a coffee for me) and then we walked around the East Side Gallery (art that was done along the wall in the 90s), before heading home to get ready for the show. We had originally planned to get there early, but you all know how that goes... So we ended up arriving with the massive hoards of people getting off the train, then casually walking through a forest to get to the venue, where we promptly stood in line for two hours waiting to get in. We completely missed the opening band, and the first few songs of Moderat’s set, but it was worth it once we were in. We were able to make our way down to the front of the massive venue and danced our asses off. And then we got a snack before the looooooong trek home, where we literally squeezed into the metro with thousands of other people (where I met a very nice Spanish woman) and then onto a bus, and then a long walk back to the apartment. It didn’t matter though because we were both in incredibly good moods and it felt like we were in 7th grade again, dancing in the street and obsessing over how good the show was.

The next day was our “historical Berlin” day, where we saw more of the wall, learned about the failed and successful escape attempts, and what life was like on the East side. From there we went to a museum called “Topography of Terror” which was quite frankly the most depressing and terrifying thing we did our whole trip and maybe in my whole life. Without getting too into it, it was a museum about how Hitler came into power, and a very thorough documentation of what he did with it. The scary part, though, was in how many parallels there were in 1930s-40s Germany and 2017 in America. Food for thought. To get ourselves even more depressed, we went to the Memorial for the Murdered Jews of Europe, which was hauntingly beautiful. Our spirits were lifted though hearing the peals of laughter coming from the small children to whom the giants stones were nothing more than a playground, something for them to play “hide and go seek” behind. We decided to treat ourselves to Asian food for dinner, and went to this beautiful restaurant, that was full of upper middle class couples and playing rather explicit rap. It was an interesting evening. Our last day in Berlin was a pretty mellow one, traveling for a month was catching up to us and we spent the day chilling in a park and in a cute little coffee shop. That night we made ourselves our last plates of pasta and wine and binged Grace and Frankie.

AND THEN WE WERE OFF TO MADRID! A 4 hour flight and 3 metro trains later we arrived at MY APARTMENT! I cannot even begin to describe the relief that I felt at realizing that it was a real place, I hadn’t been scammed and that I really did have a place to live for the next few months. Jordan really didn’t feel well, so I left her sleeping and spent the day getting the immediate things we needed (AKA sheets and my credit card) and signing my lease. We ordered pizza to properly break in the apartment, and though it was rather loud that night in the apartment, definitely a wake up call to the fact that I voluntarily chose to live in international student housing, it has since gotten much better. The next day was the second day that we had been waiting for the entire trip - IKEA DAY! We took a half an hour long metro ride and then a 15 minute walk and loaded me up with (almost) everything I needed. It was a hilariously exhausting trip back, but we managed to carry everything that we bought in our hands, trekked back to the metro and then to my apartment. I am the kind of mover that likes to get everything done in one day, so I dragged Jordan out again and we had the BEST TIME. All that we had left to buy were hardware (screwdriver, fan, etc) and home goods (laundry detergent, trash bags), so we did some google mapping until we found what we thought was the perfect place. And then it was closed. Dejected, exhausted and done for the day, we started to make our way back home. We had passed this little store selling coffee makers and specialty coffee, and Jordan recommended that we stop in, knowing how much I need my morning fix. The guy who helped us was unbelievably friendly, and pointed us in the direction of a store two blocks away that would have everything else we needed. We went there next, to be helped by two more incredibly nice guys and got EVERYTHING. Arms full of shopping bags, we went to pick up some takeout for dinner and I realized that I had forgotten the one thing that I actually really needed, trash bags. I left Jordan with all the stuff, ran back into the shop to grab some and realized I didn’t have any cash. The machine could only do credit card transactions over $5, so the guy just let me take them and told me to just pay him tomorrow. Can you believe that?? I love this place.

The next day, after a few more shopping adventures, we decided to tourist around a little. First stopping at Atocha (the train station) to pick up our train tickets for Barcelona the next day, then going to el Retiro (park) and around downtown to get back home. We tried to get to bed early that night because our train left at 8am the next day, but naturally only slept for about 4 hours. We dragged ourselves out of bed, managed to make it to the train station on time, and 2.5 hours later we were in Barcelona! It was incredible to be back in the city that originally made me fall in love with Spain and we headed directly for the beach, where we spent the whole day listening to the familiar anthem of “Cervezaaaaaa beer agua waaaaaater cervezaaaaa sangriaaaa.” Jordan was not a fan, but I felt completely at home. It alternated between being sunny and cloudy all day, which made it the perfect temperature for swimming and laying. I was thrilled. It was dinnertime before I knew it, and we treated ourselves to a Menu del Dia, where Jordan had her first paella, patatas bravas and crema catalana. We were so relaxed that we nearly missed our last train, but we did in fact make it back to the apartment nearly 18 hours after left. We slept hard that night, and then it was Jordan’s last day. We spent our last few hours together relaxing, packed up her things, went to the store, and then had one last dinner and gelato. I went with her to the airport, and we sat together and looked at photos to kill time before we parted ways. I fought back tears the entire way home and then was greeted by all the roommates heading up to the terrace for a free drink. I decided to join them to try to be social, but wasn’t really in the mood and after a polite amount of time went back to bed.

I’ve spent the past couple days on my own running errands and getting settled in. I went for my first run around el Retiro, caught a gorgeous sunset along Gran Via, opened a bank account, joined a gym and am basically 100% settled in. I have a few more things to get done today, and then tomorrow I’m to Sweden for the weekend to visit Hanna! I can’t believe it, I got to see her just a few months ago in Colorado and now again! WOOO Europe is the best.

I’ll be there until Sunday, and then will spend next week doing more exploring of Madrid and maybe taking an overnight trip somewhere (since I have two travel days left on the Eurail pass whooo whooo). I’ll try to do better keeping you all posted!

1 note · View note

resbang-bookclub · 8 years

Text

AMA Transcript: A Lack of Armor

Last week, we held our first AMA in the discord chat with @amberlehcar, @peregr1ne and @thesockswhowearsfox, where lots of people stopped in to ask about their work on A Lack of Armor! Here’s some of what went down:

Q: Amber, could you take me through your process of conceiving/planning out this fic? What inspired it originally?

AmberLehcar: Oh man okay, so there was a post floating around that was like "I headcanon Soul as trans and here's why" and I just really dug it.

Peregrine: Wait, was it mine?

AmberLehcar: I don't remember who it was, but they said things like him being hypermasculine to appear more "manly."

Peregrine: I did say that in mine. That's crazy.

AmberLehcar: This was supposed to be for last year's Resbang, so I've kinda forgotten exactly what was all there, but it probably was yours.

Q: So what you are saying is that you and Pere were destined to work together?

AmberLehcar: Pere claimed me last year too! I had to back out after fic claims because life was becoming too much.

Peregrine: I mean you did come to me before that.

AmberLehcar: I did ask Pere a lot of questions. I'm cis/het, so I had a lot to learn and was really lucky that Pere was open and willing to teach me along with being an overall great partner.

Peregrine: I tried my best ^^; It's not like it was hard, just talking about myself pfft.

AmberLehcar: It was helpful though!

Peregrine: I'm glad it was. Was there more you wanted to say about the process?

AmberLehcar: I did a ton of research and was really invested in it. I see a lot of posts about the lack of representation for the LGBT+ community and really felt like I wanted to add.

Peregrine: Yeah, lack of representation really gets to me, especially because what representation there is is highly fetishized and honestly i'd rather have no rep than fetish rep.

Q: For all parties involved, where/how do you feel like you grew the most during this Resbang?

Peregrine: This was my first event where I did more than one fic, so working through that was hard, but I'm glad I did because I really wanted both.

AmberLehcar: I think when I've written in the past, I've been really "this happened then this happened" etc. It was a lot more introspective this time around, so I focused a lot more on the feelings of the characters and evoking feelings in the reader. When I tried to enter this last year, I got to like 6k words but really struggled to get there. With a new direction, I got to 30k fairly easily.

Sox: Well, it was my first Resbang and the first song I'd written since I was....18 I think. Just managing to write and record the song was a lot of growth for me.

Q: Amber, I am always interested in fic titles. Did you come up with the title of your fic beforehand, or did it develop as the story was created?

AmberLehcar: Okay, so I take all my chapter and fic titles from songs or lyrics. But A Lack of Armor made perfect sense to me because of my therapy. A few times in therapy we'd talked about putting on armor that was representative of support and good things in my life. The song "A Lack of Armor" has a line that says "like a knight without his armor I don't know who I am" and this all kinda spoke to me and fit really well with Soul and his depression/anxiety. I came up with the idea pretty much from the start and it's been with me since.

Q: You said it was a Motion City Soundtrack song, right?

AmberLehcar: All the chapter titles are from MCS songs, because I am trash lol. But they sorta go with the mood of each chapter if you go back and look at them.

Sox: Can confirm Amber is MCS trash.

Q: There's a sick playlist somewhere right?

AmberLehcar: I do have a playlist! https://open.spotify.com/user/1266385830/playlist/3xN37XwvUGsVqZNuhpRtng

Q: Most of the time it seems the usual characterization for the Evans fam is for Soul's father to be the 'worse' parent, either that or both of them being equally bad. (At least that's my view.) So I am wondering: was your decision to make Soul's dad the more accepting one an intentional subversion or did it just happen?

AmberLehcar: It just sorta happened? I am not a Mama Albarn fan. Aside from Marie, there are no good mamas in the series, so I just kinda went with that.

Sox: Blair begs your pardon.

[insert chorus of screaming about everyone's love for Blair]

AmberLehcar: Blair takes such good care of her kittens. Okay I lied, Blair and Marie are good. But yeah, I didn't want him to have absolutely no support from parents, and someone had to have taught Wes to be a good person. So Papa Evans eventually came around.

Q: For Pere: was there a scene that you knew immediately you wanted to illustrate and/or was it difficult to choose scenes to draw?

Peregrine: I definitely wanted to draw the first hug scene when I read it, when Maka was accepting, because the feelies. And then later Amber had mentioned how there was going to be a scene where soul plays his song for Maka, and I knew I really wanted to draw that too, but it wasn't written yet, so I asked her to describe the scene more for me in advance so i could draw it. She didn't have a solid idea though, so some stuff I made up, and she wrote the scene to fit my picture later actually ^^;

AmberLehcar: Your art definitely helped flesh out the scene there, thank you.

Sox: I love when Pete draws things.

Sox: *Pere

[Lots of people yelling about Pete]

Sox: God damn it.

Peregrine: The first pic with the hair I also just thought would be cute to draw, and then just for visual concepts, I wanted to draw the different stages of Soul as a bonus even if they didn't actually ever appear in the story ^^;

AmberLehcar: That first pic with the hair cutting is probably my favorite. I love them all, but that just made my heart flutter.

Q: Sox I have sort of the same question for you, did certain scenes inspire certain lyrics?

Sox: Uhhhh no not so much. I tried to write around the Mood of the fic and I talked to a local Atlanta musician about her experiences being trans with a bad family as a kid and tried to fit those to where Amber had Soul coming from. (Originally I was trying to write a SoMa Romance song but then... it came out as a Self Love Fuck you Mom song).

AmberLehcar: I'm glad it changed. At some point when writing I realized the fic was more focused on their relationship than him, so I tried to change it up. I'm glad the song evolved that way too. After I got one of the last drafts of the song, I included it in chapter 8 in case people were wondering.

Q: For Amber: what made you want to put Kim as Soul's neighbor out of any other character? What made you want to do the neighbor sub plot in the first place?

AmberLehcar: Representation mostly. I love me some JacKim and thought that having a grump next door that Soul ends up kinda befriending and/or helping would be interesting. Kim was kinda a weird facet for me to write through. As someone who feels everything 110%, being in love can be kinda scary sometimes, so her thoughts on love are pretty darn close to my own: wanting to love someone wholeheartedly but being afraid of exactly how deeply you can really love someone.

Sox: I FEEL.

Q: There's a scene where they're watching a Youtube video. Is that video significant to you in some way, Amber? (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5wWBLbQInqk)

AmberLehcar: Not at all. I was talking with Brian about assignments for the first day of class, and he mentioned he had to do that exact assignment and chose that exact video. The song's not bad and the video is... interesting?

Q: For Pere: What program do you use and whats your general process for art?

Peregrine: I use FireAlpaca because it's free lol. I usually do like, a base sketch that's really scribbly and focuses on like motion lines, if that makes sense. And then i decrease the opacity of that one and draw the actual lineart on a different layer on top, and then colour. Very rarely I'll keep drawing on the base sketch and just clean it a little but that's mostly for more actiony gestural stuff, or highly detailed things where I'm not bothered about solid lineart.

Q: How long-ish did each of your drawings take? Do you tend to draw faster when you're feeling inspired, do you have a creative process or anything?

Peregrine: Ah, I never know what to say when someone asks how long it takes, because it varies so much. But yeah, usually a drawing will take a few days if it's something average and not like the fricking Pacific Rim art I did way back when, which took like a month. I can do most pieces in a day if i'm properly inspired but it's like: yes, I can get this done in only a few hours, but those are completely straight drawing hours - no food or bathroom breaks or chit chats to be had. Honestly the longest part of the drawing process is actually the sketchy first part because I need to plan it out perfectly until i can see the end product in my head and then i can start actually working, and that can take weeks.

[insert group yelling about how great Pere's art is]

AmberLehcar: The boys brought me to literal tears every time they updated me.

Sox: Lies.

AmberLehcar: EVERY TIME.

Peregrine: I spent 5 hours drawing Soul's hair even though I finished the entire rest of the picture in 2.

Sox: I just had a mental image of Pere screaming the lyrics to Maroon 5's "Misery" while drawing.

Peregrine: That's me.

Q: For Amber: what were your easiest/hardest scenes to write & why?? Were there any that were easier/trickier to write than you expected? Bonus: favorite scene to write?

AmberLehcar: All of chapter 4 is crap and I'll fight anyone who disagrees with me. For some reason writing just general happy, normal life was really hard. The pain though, that was kiddy stuff. The first full scene I wrote was Soul's accidental confession. The idea just messed me up and I couldn't stop writing until it was all done. It's probably my favorite scene too, followed closely by Maka's acceptance.

Q: You super did not write linearly. That's so cool, I have to go in order.

AmberLehcar: No, I rarely do.

Peregrine: Man it was kind of tough reading your drafts, tbh.

Sox: SAME PERE

AmberLehcar: I'm so sorry!!

Sox: "How am I gonna write a song none of this is in order" XD

AmberLehcar: I need to give people an instruction manual for how to read my WIPs.

Peregrine: There were so many scenes that were like, great scenes on their own, but then I'm like wait, how did we get from point A to point ? Also, reading updates was hard because everyone else I've fic'd with was like 'oh just scroll down to wear you last read' but in this fic it was like... I know something was added... but where tho...

Sox: Slide to the left

Sox: Slide to the right

AmberLehcar: Never beta for me, it's a nightmare.

AmberLehcar: (That's a lie, please always beta for me, I need all the help I can get.)

Sox: Yeah but working with you is a dream tbh.

AmberLehcar: The nice thing about not writing linearly is that I could really easily work with my partners to add in ideas they had. I don't know that it was easy for them, but making it more of a collab that way was really neat for me.

Q: Do you outline everything out beforehand?

AmberLehcar: As much as I can. I derail if I don't.

Q: AmberLehcar, how did you decided where to put scenes/order them?

AmberLehcar: I have an outline template I wrote up based on a youtuber's outlining method! https://docs.google.com/document/d/1eP73LMnphqEUn20mKd78_EB_qPlbXjklvkXLknxl5R0/edit?usp=sharing. This is the outline that I've been using recently, it's been really helpful. You guys are welcome to use it!

Q: Amber, would you say this outlining method helped? Just in comparison to past fics etc.

AmberLehcar: Definitely. I have so many incomplete fics simply because I didn't outline or didn't outline enough.

Q: So was the end planned? That is the hardest part for me.

AmberLehcar: More or less. It definitely changed a lot. I don't have any versions of the original ending, and there's still stuff from the finished product I don't remember because I literally finished at 3 a.m. the day of posting. I always have a very clear image of how the opening to any chapter or fic goes, but the end is always weird.

Q: Do you remember anything from the first version? How'd they differ?

AmberLehcar: I know the first half was a little different at the start of Resbang last year, but I have the worst memory... There was definitely supposed to be more NB Crona. Crona was supposed to be kinda the comic relief, making comments about their computer sciences classes that Soul does not understand. They named their laptop Nora and talk about it like it's a person. "Sometimes when Nora doesn't do what I want, I have to hit her" or something like that, make Soul concerned for this poor child. The "octagonal day" joke made it to the final cut. I think there was a scene at the end where Crona and Soul were supposed to be good friends after the "there's 10 kinds of people in this world, those who understand binary and those who don't." Because it's a math joke and a binary joke.

Sox: Amber Sox: Is Sox: A Sox: NERD

Q: What was the funnest part of the fic for you to write, Amber? Or the part you were looking forward to the most?

AmberLehcar: Writing Black Star was fun. There's a few one liners that I love. My favorite bit is when Maka asks for his name and the next bit is "Nervous. Stupid. Sweating." I needed that smooch like life itself. I played with them kissing when Maka apologizes and they made up, but it didn't feel right. So I saved a sweet normal smooch for the end scene.

Sox: I literally cackled out loud on a train reading "no party like a floor meeting party because a floor meeting party is MANDATORY."

AmberLehcar: That was one of my other fave lines. My goals for the fic were representation, make it as realistic as possible, and make people feel things. I like to think I did a good job?

Sox: You accomplished all.

Peregrine: Man the parents thing hit me so hard, you did a good job.

Q: I'd love to hear about your process/writing rituals?

AmberLehcar: When it was a scene I was particularly excited to write or just suddenly inspired, I can just sit and write. But most of the time it's me sitting at the computer with tea asking myself why I do this to myself and then I just make myself write.

Q: Is there anything else you wanted to add other than more NB Crona, Amber?

AmberLehcar: When Pere showed me art of Soul's physical progression, I kinda wanted an epilogue of Soul post surgery, but time and lack of confidence in writing it well... I don't think anyone understands exactly how nervous I was to write this. I waffled a while with "you have no business writing this, you are cis, please stop."

Peregrine: Nooo it's cool because you asked. I definitely didn't think I could write trans Soul but I hoped someone would, if they asked and did it right. Which you did.

Sox: One of my close friends is trans, and when I sent him Eden, I thought he was going to tell me he hated me. And then he didn't and I was v relieved.

AmberLehcar: I definitely wanted to be as respectful and real as possible. Again, representation matters, and I wanted to help create a thing I hadn't seen done in our fandom.

Sox: You did good.

AmberLehcar: I'm really glad. I stalked the boys' tags on their work along with my own, and someone had reblogged Pere's art and was really grateful for trans Soul. I was glad to be a part of that.

Q: Did you make any playlists or anything like that to get into the writing mood? Or headspace of a character?

AmberLehcar: For headspace, Soul and I are very similar. I too am a bag of anxiety and depression trying to pass as a human. A lot of my college and therapy experience went into the fic. There's little bits of me in pretty much everyone.

Peregrine: I have my trans boy song i listened to a lot pfft. It's from Treasure Planet.

Q: Ooo which song Pere?

Peregrine: I'm Still Here. If you look at it through a trans lens its super fitting. It's like my fave song ever.

Some additional post-AMA discussion:

Q: Amber, I think that's a sign of a good writer, to take from one's own experiences and such.

AmberLehcar: Write what you know, right? And what you don't know, you find out. The whole experience definitely gave me a new appreciation for the LGBT+ community, that's for sure. I knew some stuff, but I learned so much.

AmberLehcar: To go back and slightly change my answer for difficult scene to write, while all of ch4 was like swimming in syrup to get written, Mama Evans outburst was so difficult to write. There was just so much anger and I felt icky writing a lot of that chapter in general. Writing Maka having to purposely misgender him hurt.

Peregrine: I really liked the parents thing actually even though i hated it. It felt raw and real.

AmberLehcar: So much pain, the whole time I'm just like "why would I hurt my son like this???"

Q: Noticed you guys were still talking and guh I loved your collective art/story!!! I now know the gap between dimensions can't be breached because if it could I'd have reached through the screen and force-choked Mama Evans. I was kind of mad at Maka too though like... I can understand that Soul needed some time to himself, away from her, to really figure things out, but ;-;

AmberLehcar: Yes! Maka was an interesting situation to figure out.

Peregrine: Yeah I loved what you did there actually, because as much as I wanted her to be perfect, she wasn't perfect.

AmberLehcar: I didn't want her to just immediately come back like "sorry you startled me, let's get married."

Peregrine: As much as I want people to immediately accept me, they don't, even if they do eventually. It wasn't fantasy perfect world, it was real world.

Q: I think... that's good. At first I thought Maka would be more likely to start off rough around the edges and then end the story gracefully. But the more I thought about it, the more I realized that if you're going to relate realistic stories about trans people/anyone in a similar situation, you probably have to... I don't want to say "break the reader's heart" because that would imply that those stories can't have happy endings, which they can and should at least as often as any other kind of story, but it put me in Soul's shoes and made me accept how likely it is that someone who is trans/lgbt/otherwise oppressed will be badly hurt by someone they think the world of, someone who's hard to leave behind. I dunno if I spoke out of turn there, but i think it was an empathically-written story. In my inexperienced opinion.

AmberLehcar: That's definitely what I was going for. I wanted Maka to be his closest friend, for his sake and for my shipping heart's sake. But she was just too good to be true when I was writing her, so her running away happened. I was so stuck after I wrote his confession, I didn't know how to have her react. But when I thought about some of the internalized transphobia I know I've been guilty of, it made sense to add for her. It felt real.

Look out for some more transcripts, coming soon!! Thanks again to Amber, Pere and Sox for their awesome AMA <3

#a lack of armor #rbbc #resbang AMAs #AMA transcripts

6 notes · View notes

spectrumscribe · 8 years

Text

Your Heart’s Desire

a very late submission to @tmntflashfic‘s valentine’s day prompt thing, since it got insanely long, and has to be broken up into parts.

Master Post of Chapters.

————————————————————————————- Chapter Two.

“Is this me?”

Casey twisted his head, looking away from the quick stir-fry he was working cooking on the stove. Raphael was shifting through his schoolwork on the table, and it looked like he’d found the gesture sketches.

“Uh, yeah? ‘s for my classes,” Casey explained, trying for nonchalance. He shoved the vegetables in the pan around a bit. “What do you think?”

Raphael was quiet for a moment, and Casey started to feel weirdly nervous about the demon seeing his artwork. Which was odd, because he never gave a shit about what anyone thought of his art.

It’d been a weird week, so he gave himself some slack on that front.

“…it’s good,” Raphael said eventually, still tracing the page with his eyes. “It’s not as good as a lot of other people’s, but you’re a relatively young human. I guess you have time to get better still.”

“Can you say something without insulting me?”

“No. Idiot.”

Casey huffed, and went back to making dinner.

He was grinning though.

“Asshole,” He said, adding some soy sauce to the pan.

“Right back at you,” Raphael replied without hesitation.

After dinner, they tried playing some games against each other. Casey chose Street Fighter, because he knew he was awesome at it, and felt like showing Raph up at something.

It didn’t go quite as he planned.

“How do you keep beating me?!” Casey exclaimed in dismay, watching the screen flash ‘Loser’ on his half of the divide yet again. “You’ve probably never even played a video game before!”

“Yeah I have, what do you think I do all day in my home dimension?” Raphael asked incredulously, lowering his video counsel. “Eat souls and torture sinners?”

“Uh, yeah??”

“Well you’re wrong. I only do that on Tuesdays.”

“I can’t tell if you’re kidding or not.”

“Yes.”

“Raaaaaaaaph…”

“Best seven out of ten, then? If I win, I get three drops of your blood.”

Casey recoiled, flinching away from Raph. “Yo, what?!”

Raph gave him a look, like Casey was being the weird one here. “Spoils for winning, you know? Fairs fair and all that. Humans do betting too, why is this such a shock to you?”

“We don’t bet our blood!”

“You clearly don’t know much about your own history then.”

“Fucking- can’t we bet normal stuff?”

“This is normal where I come from.”

“Yeah and you come from hell, what’s your point?”

“My point is that you’re being a wimp.”

Casey narrowed his eyes. “Take that back.”

“If you win, you get something equal to three drops of human blood,” Raph said, leveling a look at Casey. “If I win, you already know what I want.”

“How much is my blood worth anyways?” Casey asked, suspicious of being gipped.

Raph shrugged. “A fair amount. Humans are good conduits for a lot of things. Why do you think we encouraged all those sacrifices over the centuries? You could conquer a dimension with enough of those.” Raph blinked. “I probably shouldn’t have told you that. Whatever. You want to bet or not?”

Raph stuck out his hand, short claws extended and a faint red pulse in the center of his palm.

Casey looked at the hand, weighing his options.

What April would do, or what teenage him would do; that was the question.

…eh, fuckit. Now he was curious.

Casey grabbed Raph’s hand. “Deal.”

Their joined hands felt hot, and Raph smiled a pointy grin.

"̢L̢et͠'͟s̷ ̵p͢ĺa̧y ̢t͞hen͢.͘"

Casey lost by two games, and ended up having to slit his finger tip with a kitchen knife.

It was honestly worth the loss, since Raph lit up like a fucking Christmas tree, and almost destroyed Casey’s living room- again- on his way out the balcony doors. Wings extended before he even made it out all the way, and tail lengthening and sweeping Casey’s CD rack onto the floor as he went.

Watching a demon power like some kind of anime character was a thing that Casey would probably never forget, and did not want to forget.

Casey was so sketching that when he got a chance. The process of Raph swiping the drops from his fingers with his tongue, and a bright green glow filling his eyes.

Casey followed outside soon as he could, and hauled ass up to the rooftop of his apartment to see Raph swooping through the air like a maniac. The demon’s laughter could be heard even down on the roof, booming through the air as he shot off red sparks.

That was with just three drops of blood, what would more do? That was the thought Casey had, watching Raph dive and glide at insane speeds.

He also had the thought, what would it be like to fly like that?

He didn’t get a chance to ask though, since Raph stopped circling the roof around then, and flew off into the distance. Casey watched him leave, and wondered if he’d be back. He hoped so. He still needed to chew Raph out for knocking his CD’s over, and challenge the demon to a rematch.

Casey realized a few minutes later, while he was smoking lazily on his couch and half watching a game re-run, that somewhere along the evening’s progression he’d started calling Raphael ‘Raph’ instead.

He stubbed out his cig in the ash tray, and didn’t linger on the thought.

Raph was back on Casey’s couch the next morning, halfway between forms and definitely crushing the springs.

“And where’d you get off to last night?” Casey asked, grabbing some sandwich meats out of the fridge for a morning sub. He was an adult; he made his own breakfast choices. “Terrorize any good villages?”

“Nah… none nearby,” Raph rumbled sleepily, stretching his wings with a huge yawn, and flopping back onto the couch. “Just went for a flight. Felt good, haven’t done it in a few days. Your fault by the way.”

“Hm. Yep.” Casey said without much sympathy. He finished fixing his sandwich, and took a huge bite.

“You’re working on the remembering thing again today. I still want to go home, and your break is officially over once you’re home from school.”

Casey mumbled a reply around his food, and went to put on his shoes while he kept eating. April wasn’t busing with him today, since she only had one seminar later in the day. She was probably up on the roof instead, tending to her plant hybrid experiments.

He glanced back at Raph as he picked up his bag by the door. The demon was asleep again, his dark limbs hanging off the couch since he was currently too big for it.

He really was like a huge, grumpy cat. Full of treats and sleeping it off, complete with the early morning sun shining on him.

Casey let out a huff of laughter, and shut the door quietly behind him.

“̶An̢ytḩi͢ng͠?̀”̧

“Nada. Sorry man, I really got nothing.”

Casey heard Raph’s tail whack against the railing again, and he opened his eyes. His legs felt crampy from sitting in lotus position, especially his left knee. It was supposed to help him ‘center his energy’, but Casey wasn’t feeling it.

He rubbed his smarting knee, trying to ease the old ache there. “Can I call it quits yet? I’m bored as fuck, dude.”

“̴You ̢t͏hin͢k ̛you’r̛e̕ ̨bore͜d̵?” Raph said, a sneer clear in his voice. “̸I’vè ͏bée͏n̶ s͘tuc̶k͠ ̡he͜ŗe͡ ̨f̴or͡ ͡ al̕mo̕s̴t a̸ whól̵e ẃe̕e̸k͞, ̢a͡nd͠ I͜’͡m͘ si͢c̡k of̴ i̸t̨.͘”̨

“Yeah, and I’ve been stuck with you for a whole week. So touché, buddy.”

"I̴ ͞f͞e̕e͢l lik̀e̴ ͡y͡ou̴'͘re u͢s͢ing͡ th͏at i̕nc̸orrect̡ly͏."

Casey shuffled himself in a circle, turning to look at the enormous demon chilling out on his apartment’s rooftop. “What do you know about linguistics?”

"Con͞s͝id͠er̀ing I've ͡b̀èęn a̴liv̢è ̴l͡o͝n͟ger̸ th͝an ̷yo̡u can ̕c̶om̕preh͢e͝nd͟,-” Raph said loftily, opening one lazy green eye at Casey. “-proba͜b̧l͠y̵ mór̀ę tha̴n̡ ͜yo̡u."̡

Casey glared at the demon, leaning on his palm. “Yeah, whatever, old man.”

Raph growled, opening his maw enough to flash his fangs. "Sh͞u͝t ͝up. ̸A̶nd ̀f̡ine̷, you ͢c͠an ţake͢ a ̕b̢r̶eàk̨."̷

“You’re not the boss of me,” Casey said, just because he felt like it.

"́I̶n y͜o͝u̴r͞ o̡pin͘i̡ơn," Raph said, but there was a teasing tone to his voice.

Casey rolled his eyes, and stretched out his legs as the demon settled back into his half-nap. God damn was that a relief to feel.

As he bent over his legs, stretching slowly, he took a moment to look at the demon on his rooftop. Raph was comfortably stretched out himself, all scaly and everything.

The whole ‘invisible to mere mortals’ thing was pretty cool, since it let Raph chill in his full demon form without issue. His wings were opened and laid flat, and his hair crest going down the length of his spine and tail swayed gently in the early summer wind.

Casey noticed that with the sun on him, Raph’s scales weren’t black. They were just a very, very dark green.

He chuckled to himself, because that plus the red tips on his hair, Raph was technically Christmas colored. He’d make a sickass holiday symbol, especially if he was the one pulling the sleigh on Christmas Eve.

"͢What'́r̸e͞ y̵ǫu ̶l̛a̵u̕gh͘i͡ng ̛a̧t͟?" Raph asked without opening his eyes.

“Nothin’, nothin’… just something stupid.”

Casey was totally drawing that out, and slapping it onto any Christmas cards he made later that year. Probably all the ones following too.

"͞If it͟'͠s̶ ̸y̶o̸u,͡ it̨ prob̨abl͝y̢ ̧i̢s̢ so͠me̢t͟h̵in͞g s̴tupid.͏"

“Hey!”

“You’re very interested in this one subject lately, Casey,” His teacher said, examining the sketches he’d produced that day. She picked up the top paper, looking at the mid-transformation version of Raph. “I’m curious, what’s the source of your inspiration? You’ve improved greatly in just the last week.”

Casey shrugged. He hadn’t noticed he was improving; he’d just been going at it without much thought. It was how he always did his work. “Got a cat, and I guess he’s been influencing my mood.”

His teacher raised her eyebrow. “Interesting interpretation of a cat.”

“Hey, art is subjective ain’t it?”

She chuckled, grinning fondly. “I suppose so. Keep up the good work; I’m excited to see your mid-term project.”

“Heh, me too. Dunno what I’m gonna do with it yet.”

“Oh, I’m sure you’ll think of something.”

“Okay, the meditation thing isn’t working, so we’re trying something new,” Casey chucked a stick at Raph, and grinned. “Like some street hockey.”

Raph looked at the old hockey stick Casey had tossed at him, and then looked at Casey. “Seriously?”

“What? It’s when I do my best thinking.”

“Why am I not surprised.”

“Don’t knock it till you try it. Who knows, maybe me squaring off with you without punching will make somethin’ come back to me.”

“Yeah let’s hope so. I’m seriously ready to go home.”

Casey bounced the hard rubber ball on the ground, and caught it on the tip of his stick. “You ready to play or not?”

Raph’s tail swished around his feet, and he rolled his shoulders. “This is kid’s shit. I used to play the better version of this. It had fire involved.”

“Yoooooo… fire hockey’s a thing?”

“Yup. I don’t know why you humans eliminated it. It was probably the best game you’d made in centuries.”

“Okay-” Casey pointed a finger at Raph. “-we are so trying that some time, because that sounds like the sickest shit ever. Right now though? We’re doing the street version. Fire hockey can be later.”

“Sounds good to me. I’ll try not to burn you too badly when we do.”

“You can fuckin’ try, little man.”

“I think I will, stultas mortalium.”

“I don’t know what that means but fuck you.”

And with that, Casey flipped the ball into the air, and slapped it towards Raph.

The low traffic in Casey’s neighborhood was one of his favorite things about it, since it meant he could spend hours in the alley without worrying about cars. He hadn’t had a chance to play against someone on level with him in a long while- April only played sometimes, and none of Casey’s art buddies were much for sports- so facing off with Raph was refreshing.

Casey laughed in surprised every time Raph bent and dodged in a physically impossible way. The demon’s body hinged differently than a human’s, evident as he darted around the alley.

For such a stocky guy, Raph moved pretty quickly. Casey was built for speed, so he kept up easily, but damn could the guy move. Maybe it had to do with the tail, which likely helped Raph balance himself faster on the go, but Casey didn’t stop to consider that too much.

Anatomy examination later, hockey now, was his thought process.

Casey had better reach, because his arms were way longer than Raph’s, and he used that his advantage as best he could. He got a couple goals in on Raph like that, slamming the ball home between the trash cans they’d set up. Raph retaliated by using his suddenly there wings to give him a boost, and claimed an equal number of goals on Casey.

In all the rush and adrenaline, Casey forgot to watch himself.

He was too distracted, complete tunnel-vision around Raph’s fast moving form, and he mis-stepped at the wrong moment. A too sharp turn, and he pivoted on his left leg incorrectly.

Casey felt his knee lock up with a sharp pain, and he buckled before he could stop himself.

“Casey- hey Casey! Shit, you alright?”

Casey hissed between his teeth, hands tight around his throbbing joint. “Fuck- no, no I’m- fucking- god, I should have been more careful. Fuck. Fuck that hurts a lot.”

Two strong hands grabbed him by the armpits, and hauled him to his feet. Raph’s arm went under his, and Casey was suddenly being supported by an oddly concerned demon.

“What the hell was that?” Raph asked in a serious tone. “I didn’t even tap you.”

“Old injury, just get me to the step. I gotta stretch it out before it gets too stuck,” Casey said, wincing as he tried to put weight on his leg joint. Nope, hurt too much still. “Ah fuck. I’m gonna have to call it, I’m not walking on this the rest of the night.”

“How’d you hurt yourself like that? Don’t you humans have medicine to fix any injury these days?” Raph asked lowering Casey onto the back steps of the apartment complex.

“Hngh, not quite,” Casey said, easing his twinging muscles. He put his thumbs on either side of his knee, and started massaging. “I got badly fucked up in my knee joint when I was a kid. Well, not a kid. I was seventeen-ish. I got surgery right after, but it wasn’t enough to get me back on the ice.”

“What do you mean?” Raph asked, sitting down next to Casey. His tail brushed against Casey’s leg, starting to coil loosely around it, before Raph twitched it away again.

Casey watched the tail for a moment, and then refocused on his knee. He sighed heavily, trudging frustrations back up old. “All I ever wanted was to play pro. Be one of the greats and all that. I had talent too, which was part of why I was so damn driven. I knew I could do it if I really put my mind to it. I was even lined up for a full scholarship before… before the accident happened.”

Raph was still listening silently, so Casey continued. “I got sidelined by an oncoming car. The driver wasn’t even drunk or anything; he just didn’t see me crossin’ the street. Fucked my knee but good. Doctors told me straight up I wouldn’t be able to go professional, even once I got back on my feet. It was… it was hard, man. I’d bet a lot of shit on my career as a hockey player, and then it was gone-” Casey snapped his fingers. “-just like that. I lost my scholarship, and had to settle for takin’ out student loans for my new majors.”

“…I’m sorry to hear that happened,” Raph said. “It sounds like it was hard.”

Casey shrugged, a little weirded out by the genuine sympathy in the demon’s voice. “I got over it. Switched career paths to future freelance artist, and here we are. It’s not exactly what I dreamed of as a kid, but I like my life okay enough. Always loved fucking around in art class, so it wasn’t too bad of a switch.”

He was downplaying it. It’d been horrible the first year, going through physical therapy and coming to terms that everything he’d ever wanted just wasn’t going to happen. It’d sucked like nothing else, and Casey had been pretty much the picture of misery- until his sister shoved his sketchpad into his hands, and told him to stop being a mopey idiot.

Bless her; he should call her more often.

A magic rune circle suddenly popped up in front of him, and Casey blinked the flashes of light out of his sight as it disappeared just as quick. He looked questioningly at Raph, and the demon shrugged.

“Was just checking if that’s what you’d wanted when you summoned me,” Raph said, not looking directly at Casey. “Figured your sob story sounded like enough of a desire, you’d give even your soul for it.”

“But it’s not?” Casey asked, putting a hand on his chest where the circle had been.

“No, sorry,” Raph said, sounding like he meant it.

“It’s alright, it’s not your fault I didn’t take the chance when I had it,” Casey said, forcing nonchalance into his voice. He would not be disappointed, he would not be disappointed- he’d gotten over that stuff years ago. Life was what it was, and there wasn’t any going back. Not even for that. “Think you could help me inside? I got some painkillers in the kitchen.”

“Sure.”

As Raph slung Casey arm over his broad shoulders, Casey had an idea.

“Wait, how about we try…”

A moment later, he was shooting up the four stories to his apartment balcony, carried by his demonic house guest. Casey whooped loudly- loud enough it scattered the pigeon family that’d started roosting on the rooftop.

April poked her head out her doors as they landed, and she barely raised an eyebrow at the wings Raph had. She looked instead at how Casey was watching his leg, and how Raph was still holding him up. “You hurt your leg again?”

“Ha, yup. Got too excited.”

“You should be more careful, or you’ll have a cane before you’re forty,” She said, shaking her head in admonishment.

“Careful is for when I’m old,” Casey joked.

“I don’t think ‘careful’ is actually in your vocabulary,” April said dryly, gesturing at the demon assisting Casey still. “Case and point with your current roommate.”

“She’s got you there,” Raph agreed.

“Hey, no ganging up on me you two. I’m out numbered here.”

Casey ended up taking it easy the rest of the evening, leg propped on a pillow on the coffee table. Raph was even kind enough to share the couch- which he’d claimed as his own lately- and leave enough space for Casey to be comfortable.

He fell asleep without noticing, his pain meds making him drowsy, and jerked awake when someone tapped him on the forehead.

April loomed over him, her eyes a little too wide and her hair in disarray.

Casey didn’t even blink at her random appearance; he was used to that by now. He glanced instead at the clock, and realized it was insanely late. He rubbed his eyes, yawning as he did. “Je-sus April, what’re you doing in my apartment at three in the morning?”

“All-nighter,” April said in a flat tone, giving away just how long she’d been awake. “I need some of the plants I gave you.”

“Wha’ for?” Casey asked, still mostly asleep.

“Science.”

“Of course. You know where they are,” He gestured towards the tiny apartment around them. “Just take what you need. If they come back half a carnivorous species, just make sure you gimme instructions on how to feed them.”

“It’s bioluminescence this time,” April corrected absently, already moving in on Casey’s plants.

“Oh. Cool. Send pics of the results.”

“Will do,” April muttered, examining one of the small potted plants in her hands.

Casey yawned again, and turned his head as he remembered he wasn’t the only one on the couch.

Raph’s usually terse expression was absent, his features calm and resting. His arms were crossed over his broad chest, rising steadily as he breathed slow and deep. One of his horns was poking a hole into the cushion, but Casey figured some sausages in the morning would fix that.

Casey traced the strong jaw Raph had, as well as the skin he showed down his neck and shoulders. How the guy never got cold, wearing nothing but black jeans and red tank top all the time, Casey couldn’t tell. Maybe it was all that muscle and fire breath.

“I’m surprised you two are getting along so well, all of a sudden,” April commented, reappearing with four of Casey’s plants in her arms. She looked down at him, her eyes bright with sleeplessness and caffeine. “You were at each other’s throats just a few days ago, and now you’re playing footsies.”

Casey blinked, and realized his and Raph’s feet were touching on the small coffee table. Casey took his feet off the table, and started to stand up. “We’re just figuring shit out is all, nothin’ weird about that.”

“I didn’t say it was,” April said, eyeing Casey as he struggled to put pressure on his knee again. “You did though. Hm.”

“Don’t ‘hm’ me, April,” Casey said, shooting her a look. “You’re probably running on two energy drinks and seven hours of sleep to twenty-four awake. You don’t exactly think clearly like this.”

“No, of course not,” April said, an innocent smile gracing her features. “I know nothing about nothing. Go to bed Casey, I’m sure you two have a busy day tomorrow.”

“You get weird without sleep, April,” Casey said, choosing to ignore April’s insinuations.

“Don’t we all,” April tittered- actually tittered- as she headed for the still open door into Casey’s home. She pulled it shut with the toes of her bare feet, and disappeared as quietly as she appeared. The door somehow swinging shut without a sound.

Casey shook his head, and hobbled off to bed.

And April called him weird. Demon guest notwithstanding, Casey was probably closer to normal than she was, even if she pretended otherwise.

Casey vaguely noted, as the days piled up, he got… comfortable, having his new roommate around.

Raph was still an asshole- but then again, Casey could be just as. It worked out.

They still tried at figuring out how to send Raph home, but… there wasn’t as much fervor as there used to be.

Casey didn’t question it, and didn’t bring it up. If he were honest- which he wouldn’t be- he didn’t quite want Raph to leave anymore.

Sure the guy still ate like no tomorrow, bitched about everything he could, and caused a general nuisance- but he was completely chill when he wasn’t doing all that.

Turned out Raph liked to sketch too, and traded Casey a flight in the sky for a pad and pencils. Best trade ever, in Casey’s opinion. He’d never been that high up, excluding the one flight from New York to his university.

Raph had gone up to the roof with him, changed into his full form, and let Casey climb onto his back. Casey was instructed to hold onto Raph’s stiff crest, and to not let go.

Then they’d shot up into the air, and Casey had screamed with everything he had.

It was incredible.

He could barely see at first, they’d been going so fast, but some magical trick of Raph’s fixed that. He managed to convince Raph to stay up in the air until Casey’s arms and legs were sore from tensing, and it was worth every ache later in the evening.

He ended up sketching the flowing way Raph could fly, once he was up in the air, while Raph sat across him on the couch and sketched… whatever he’d sketched. He wouldn’t show Casey it at all. Casey returned the favor, and kept his drawings to himself.

Raph started showing at his school again, but minus the destruction of property and ninja sneak attacks. Mostly, he avoided campus security, and strolled in and out of Casey’s free-study periods without care if Casey was working or not.

Casey’s classmates gave him questioning looks, and actually spoken questions, about the tank top guy who kept dropping by. Casey kept things vague.

“He’s just a guy I know,” He said, the fifth time someone asked.

“A guy who stops by every second period?” His easel buddy questioned incredulously.

“Yes,” Casey said shortly, then popping on his headphones so he didn’t have to answer any more queries.

Raph would also come and steal bits of Casey’s lunches- and April’s, when he could get away with it without injury by plastic cutlery. April wielded a mean fork, and an even meaner spork.

His two friends interacted with a dynamic of sniping and blunt questions, which was way too hilarious to watch as they tried to out smarm each other within a forty-five minute period.

When Raph had gone from ‘unwanted houseguest’ to ‘friend’, Casey couldn’t tell. He didn’t linger on that thought, same as all the other thoughts he wasn’t lingering on.

Casey started working on his mid-term project, finally laying down the sketched groundwork for it.

He pushed it to the very back of the studio, and put a sheet over it when he wasn’t there.

Casey had originally been used to only one person invading his home space- April- but he’d somehow adjusted quickly to having two. One of them being a constant presence, excluding when he disappeared for solo flights.

It was comfortable. Casey kind of really liked it, having company like Raph’s.

When he wasn’t trying to be a deliberate asshole, or setting something or someone on fire, he was fairly cool to hang around. Games, sketching, sometimes cooking if Casey could convince Raph to flash-fry things with his magic… it was fun. A lot of fun.

Casey avoided thoughts about Raph leaving, and started to only reluctantly work on remembering why he’d summoned him. He did it still, if only to keep the dynamic they had going, and because he felt a bit bad for trapping Raph on his plain of existence.

Raph wasn’t complaining a ton anymore though, so maybe he’d adjusted?

Casey didn’t mention that fact. He didn’t want to bring it to the demon’s attention, if it’d slipped by.

Things stayed pretty calm, until he came home after school about two and a half weeks into Raph’s stay, and found the demon hunched over something on the carpet.

Casey dropped his bag in horror, as he realized… there were shredded plants everywhere on his carpet.

“Oh… no, no no no- shit!” Casey grabbed at his hair, starting to panic. “Raph, please tell me you didn’t demolish April’s new plants. Please tell me you didn’t!”

Raph’s tail lashed across the floor, sweeping more torn leaves around. Casey noticed it was weirdly puffy in places, but he ignored it as he started to march towards Raph. “Dude, seriously. Do you know how fricking important those were to her projects? She’s going to kill us for this-”

Casey bit off the rest of his words, as Raph’s head whipped around, and Casey got a look at the demon’s eyes.

His sclera was still white, but his pupils were blown completely wide. His usually green eyes looked black.

Casey raised his hands defensively, the hair on the back of his neck standing up. “Whoooooa- okay. Okay. The fuck’s with you?”

Raph’s only response was a low growl, and another tail lash.

Casey stepped backwards from the crouching demon, hands still raised. Maybe it was time to go and find April’s water gun. “Yeah… uh, I’m just gonna go. You can keep those plants if you like. Um. April will just need to talk to you la-AH FUCK-!”

Raph suddenly bounded towards him, and Casey tried to turn tail and run- but a solid mass of muscle landed on his back, and his chin met the floor.

Sharp nails prickled his back, and Casey ineffectively tried to scramble out from under Raph’s weight. Casey may or may not have shrieked, as a rolling growl emanated from the chest pressed against him, and the size of the hands holding him increased.

Casey was halfway out of his head with panic- because holy shit how did he forget that Raph could totally kill him at any time- when something raspy and wet went up the back of his neck.

Casey shrieked as the sensation repeated itself.

“What the FUCK Raph-?!” Casey yelled, cut off again as Raph’s tongue slid over his hair, and his words turned into another scream.

Casey struggled a few more times, but ultimately resigned himself to being groomed by the giant, stupid cat demon sitting on him. “You know what? I changed my mind about you being an okay guy. Fuck you.”

Raph’s only response was something that was almost definitely a purr.

Casey’s scalp was drenched by the time he remembered his keyset in his pocket.

Giant cat, fucking duh, he knew how to get the idiot off his literal back.

Casey ignored the way his arm hurt, wedging it between Raph’s scaly chest and the floor, and poked around in his pockets for his keys.

Soon as he had them, he tugged them free, and turned on the pen laser.

Raph’s grooming stopped, and then his weight vanished in a puff of smoke.

Casey scrambled onto his feet, shuddering at the cold feeling his wet hair gave him, and looked at the now mostly human Raph. The demon was staring intently at where the red dot had disappeared, tail lashing on the floor.

Casey looked at the laser in his hands, then back at Raph.

If he were someone else, this would be the time to duck and run.

He was not someone else.

Casey switched on the penlight again.

April kicked in his door the thirtieth time the walls shook, and she looked down right murderous.

“Casey. Fucking. Jones.” She growled through her teeth, stalking into the room. “I don’t know if you know this, but that is the wall we share, and I am trying to study right now, and-” She stopped, and zeroed in on the decimated plant life on the floor. “Are those my plants? Casey.”

Casey shied away from his neighbor’s fury, grinning sheepishly. "I’m sorry, I know, but watch this."

He whisked the penlight across the room, and Raph went flying into the wall following it. The resounding thump shook the wall and left a sizable dent, but Casey personally felt it was worth it.

“See? See??” Casey said, gesturing at the dazed demon. “He’s high as a kite and it’s fucking hilarious.”

April looked at Raph- pupils still blown wide and how he was all around puffy- and then back at Casey, who was trying to seem as innocent as possible. She didn’t look impressed.

“Okay in my defense- he was like this when I got here. I had nothing to do with the plants.”

“Sure.”

“Seriously! I was totally going to come and find you, but you see this shit? I couldn’t just- just not do this, I mean come on. How many chances am I going to-”

Casey shrieked as Raph jumped on his back again, and April watched passively as the demon held Casey to the floor.

“Okay, now this?” She said, cracking a smile as Raph started purring again. “This is hilarious.”

Casey stretched his arm out for the penlight, and fell short by an inch. “April- April help, he’s going to start- AUGH FUCK- SEE?! HE’S GROOMING ME.”

“I’m seeing alright,” April said, still not helping Casey.

“Apriiiiiiiiiil…”

“You made your grave, lay in it with dignity,” April said unsympathetically as Raph’s heavy weight crushed Casey’s lungs.

“Help me!”

“Mmm… no thanks,” April said, reaching into her jeans pocket.

“Are- are you getting out your phone?”

“Yes I am.”

“Unbelievable.”

“Say cheese, Casey,” April grinned, turning the camera on him and the demon on his back.

“You know what, fuck you too, April,” Casey said grumpily, flipping the camera and his friend off. “You’re both horrible people and I’m never trusting either of you again.”

“Technically, the demon currently grooming you like a kitten isn’t a people.”

“Fuck off.”

“Not until I’m finished with some blackmail.”

“Fuck oooooooff.”

April only laughed at his position on the floor, and Raph’s rumbling purr said exactly what he thought of the situation.

“You wouldn’t let me off the floor for a whole hour.”

“Shut up!”

“A whole. Hour.”

“I said I was sorry!”

“Sorry doesn’t change what happened!”

“Fuck you!”

“Fuck you! April has blackmail on us now!”

Raph’s reply made the lights flicker, and the remaining plants in Casey’s apartment die.

Casey pointed a finger at him. “Okay, just because you’re being pissy, doesn’t mean you do black magic in the apartment.”

“It’s not black magic!” Raph exclaimed, throwing his hands up. “You humans invented that idea! Magic is magic! There’s no black or white or grey anything!”

“That sounds fake but okay.”

Raph hissed, and kicked the coffee table.

“I said leave off the coffee table!”

“Fuck you!”

April sent them both the video later that evening- for the third time, because she was cruel and heartless- and Casey and Raph couldn’t even watch the thing. Casey had honestly never been more mortified, and it was a hard thing to mortify him. Raph didn’t look any better off.

Raph had grabbed Casey’s phone, deleted the link, and looked him dead in the eye as he did. “We never speak of this to my family. We never speak of this again at all.”

“I don’t know who your family is, but agreed,” Casey said solemnly.

“And let’s hope you never do,” Raph said in a low tone, shoving the phone back at Casey and stomping out the balcony doors. He took off without a look back, and Casey didn’t blame him. There was a lot of space needed at the moment, and Casey completely welcomed it.

He went and took a long, long shower, and tried to erase from his mind the feeling of Raph’s tongue against his skin.

His mind drifted back to that one too many times though, and he had to switch to a cold shower halfway through.

His face felt like it was burning anyways.

Casey texted April when he got out of the shower, in an attempt to distract himself.

youre evil, woman

EVIL

You wrecked my plants, and hilarious after effects or not, you deserved what you got for it.

Who knew certain herbs could do that to a demon.

I may have to write this down.

dude fuck you

No thanks.

delete the video

Nope.

I made copies already, too.

Scientific evidence.

E V I L

EEEEEEVIIIIIIIL

So how did it feel to get completely dominated, Casey?

How was the tongue?

FUCKING BYE

WHY AM I FRIENDS WITH YOU

Because you like strong figures, both physically and mentally, to be in your life.

Hint hint.

IM DELETING YOUR CONTACT BYE APRIL

Goodnight, Casey.

Sinful dreams.

Whoops, I meant ‘sweet’.

Or did I?

I HATE YOU LITERALLY SO MUCH

FUCK YOU APRIL

FUCK YOU

Casey threw his phone into the corner of his laundry pile with a burning face, and vowed to never speak to April again.

Raph wouldn’t make eye contact with Casey for another day, and honestly? Casey could barely look at the guy himself. Space was very welcome at the moment.

Casey woke up to a fixed apartment though- dents and holes and claws scratches all gone- and figured that was enough of a peace treaty to warrant burying the embarrassing hatchet.

continued.

#Your Heart's Desire tag #my writing #it's an update!#look at it!!#love it!!!#raphael #Casey Jones #rasey #TMNT 2012 #tbh april is my favourite #i love her with all my heart and soul #she's the real MVP of this au #probably has no mistakes but eh #there's always a few that sneak in

21 notes · View notes