#that fucking raccoon found your sex toy

[raccoonfallsharder]

Chapter 1/3?: Blackmail Material

have some smut for your monday

a classic tale of "that fuckin raccoon found your sex-toy."

probably set post-endgame? friends-to-lovers, feel-good vibes, love confessions, exhibitionism/voyeurism, and just the tiniest bit of pussy-slapping. This will be three parts (maybe four) and may take a bit longer than my other fics to update. please remember to be 18+ and check the ao3 tags

“I’ll tell you what,” he offers up, still grinning that shit-eating grin. “I won’t say a word and I’ll give it back to you. You can even keep whatever batteries are in it.” That sounds too good to be true. You raise a brow and cross your arms in front of your breasts. “If?” “If you let me watch you use it,” he challenges, eyes daring you. “For science.”

Chapter 1/3: Blackmail Material

[mara-xx217]

Hi ! Do you mind writing wesker x virgin reader ? Like the doctor student one it’s my favorite

Porn w/o plot? On my blog? It's more likely than you think!

Warnings: Non-Con, Coercion, Power Imbalance, Loss of Virginity

You had it bad for him. You were just a rookie cop, not even S.T.A.R.S., but man you fell head over heels in love with Albert Wesker.

THE Albert Wesker! You shared a break room with the biggest star (litereally!) of the Raccoon City Police Department! He could ask anything of you and you would do it, no hesitation, no questions asked.

"Could you stay a little late and assist me with something?" At first, you assumed he was speaking to someone else. He must be, right? No way he would ask you, of all people.

"Rookie?"

Oh. OH SHIT-

"Y-Yessir?! S-Sorry, I thought-!"

"Will you stay or not?" Wesker's tone didn't change but he did pause long enough to cross his arms and look down at your from the bridge of his nose. You didn't hesitate before you sputtered out-

"Y-Yessir!"

You couldn't believe this was actually happening. The Albert Wesker wanted you? Maybe... it was only because you were rookie. Maybe it was because you were young and inexperienced. You hesitated slightly when you were pushed to your knees, looking up at Captain Wesker as he started down at you unexpectedly.

"Second thoughts?" The curtness of the question caught you off guard. You- You weren't feeling 'second thoughts'! You were only... nervous.

Right?

"N-No... I-I just... um- I-It's nothing, sir." You pushed down the anxiety and wrongness that you felt. You haven't done this before, but you weren't totally naive and stupid. You knew what to expect...

You think...

You were clumsy and unsure of yourself. You were certain Wesker would be disappointed. Instead of scolding or humiliating you, he guided your movements. He placed a hand on your head, encouraging you to go faster, slower, deeper, shallower, until you found your own rhythm.

It... wasn't so bad! Your jaw ached like your knees and the taste was... unpleasant, but it was bearable. And the noises Captain Wesker made...

He grunted softly, rocking his hips as he fucked your mouth. You felt a warmth build steadily between your legs every time he thrusted into your mouth. You moaned soft against his cock as Wesker cummed inside of your mouth.

It went like that for nearly every night for nearly a month. You knew exactly what he wanted and how he wanted it. Wesker didn't need to show you what to do after the first time.

Exactly what he expected of you.

A few times, you were 'rewarded' for your good work. Seated on his lap, your back to his chest, he toyed with you. Fingers teasing in between your folds, dipping in enough to peak your interest but not enough to stretch you by any means... He managed to make you cum with ease. It was enough... until it wasn't.

He wanted more.

It was embarrassing to be slammed against his desk. He yanked your pants- underwear and all- down to your mid thigh before you had time to catch your breath. You opened your mouth to protest but only a gasp and a flustered moan escaped as he rubbed the length of your sex with the tips of his fingers.

It drove you insane that he rarely spoke to you before, during, or after moments like this. What was he thinking? What did he feel? Probing and protesting during the moment does nothing for you. He ignores you, or, perhaps, even becomes a little cruel to you.

You had become wet the moment he motioned you to follow him to his office. It's easy for three of his fingers to slide in and out of you, making that horrible squelching noise every time they do so.

It was inevitable that this day would come. You told yourself that you were excited for this, looked forward to it, even. Yet you can only feel sickening dread when you felt his hand retreat and heard him unbuckle and unzip his pants.

No words were exchanged. It felt gross when the head of his cock rubbed between your folds before settling against your entrance. Your heart slammed in your throat. It already hurt and he was barely pressing against you.

"N-No! Wait! I-I don't-!"

You have second thoughts. It's gone too far. You don't think- Do you-? NO! You don't want this! You began to panic. You rise up only to be slammed down by a hand clenching the nape of your neck hard enough to make you wince. Your panic continued to grow.

"S-SERIOUSLY! STO-"

A sudden pain choked you up, preventing you from speaking. Tears sprung to your eyes as a sharp burning sensation bloomed in your core.

You couldn't breathe-

The only sound you could manage were a few gasps and soft grunts as your lungs constricted from pain. It doesn't really feel real. Your cheek is pressed into the desk. It's already warm and you can see your breath fogging on the polished wood.

The pain was something you could deal with. The pleasure, though?

It felt awful. Wesker grunted softly above you every time his hips connected with yours. You gasp as burning pain turns into tingling warmth. A rush of your wetness makes the pain subside even more, until you can screw your eyes shut an nearly trick yourself into believing this was what you wanted all along.

It ended before you got any real enjoyment out of it. A wet warmth rushed inside of you, making your knees buckle and your stomach turn. You thought that was it. Wesker pulled out of you. You lay there, still stunned that this happened at all. To your surprise, he slipped his fingers inside of you.

You reached your own climax quickly. Even after you did, he still worked his fingers inside of you. He smeared his and your cum on the mound of your sex before pulling his hand away.

Just like that, he fixed his uniform and he left you. Alone. Without a word to clean yourself up and his office up.

And you did.

And when he asked you to return to his office the next night you agreed.

@prettycutebunny, @infinitewhore, @kennbb, @slutwithadegree, @dead-bxxxtch-walking, @space-arsonist, @pink-soft-shadow, @sinlessdesire, @hoemine

[moonbeambucky]

Hey Neighbor (Part 22)

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Reader, Peter Quill x Reader Word Count: 3377 Warnings: fluff, angst

Summary: You had a plan and then life came along with one of its own. With your future almost derailed you worked hard to get yourself back on track and finally everything seemed to be going right… that is, until your new neighbor moved in.

A/N: I’m not going to lie, you’re going to be mad for a while. Feedback is always appreciated!

HEY NEIGHBOR PART 21 | HEY NEIGHBOR MASTERLIST

If you told yourself that after what happened Bucky you would be smiling and laughing more than ever before you would have called yourself crazy. At one point it felt like you would never be happy again and then you met Peter.

Peter was the sun that shined brightly pushing the clouds away. You went on a few more dates, texted everyday and found that there was no longer room in your mind for sadness. Bucky was the past and though you didn’t want to be friends at the moment you didn’t hate him as much as you had before.

“Ooh flowers! Someone must really like you,” Mr. Lee said, smiling from the security booth.

You smiled walking over to him, setting down the large vase with the gorgeously arranged bouquet Peter had delivered to your office.

“I think he really does,” you beamed, thinking about how sweet Peter has been.

Sure it’s still very new but you really like him and can’t wait to spend the weekend together. He had both days off and it was so tempting to call out of your internship. If you hadn’t taken off last weekend for the stupid wedding you would have, but you know that you can’t.

Steve finally hangs up the call he was on, and you didn’t miss his tight lipped grimace and the way he eyed the flowers as if they had wronged him personally.

“If you’re happy with Peter I’m happy for you but you really need to let Bucky explain.”

Your eyes flared with a flash of rage wondering if Steve betrayed your trust and spoke to Bucky and on top of that you were really tired of people telling you what they think you need to do. You bite your tongue, not wanting to berate Steve in front of Mr. Lee with the variety of colorful words that were swirling in your mind.

Instead you replied calmly with only the teeniest hint of sass in your voice, “Steve, there’s nothing to explain and I don’t care.” You wished Stan a good weekend, grabbed the flowers and walked out.

Steve knows you’re lying, that despite what you said you’re still hurt, he just wished you weren't so stubborn about admitting it.

Laughter filled the air in Peter’s apartment as the two of you danced in his living room, the lively music from his “Awesome Mix Vol. 1” playlist bouncing off the walls. Groot lays across the couch watching as Peter’s other pet, Rocket, a ferret with raccoon coloring thanks to the dark mask around his eyes, tries to unhook the latch of his cage.

Life has been so much happier with Peter in it. You love snuggling up next to him, petting Groot who insisted his head stay in your lap as you watched a movie together. Peter’s lips press a gentle kiss on your forehead, stirring you from the sleep you had nearly given in to. A tender smile spreads across your face as you look up to him, reaching forward to kiss him. A surge of desire ignited your senses, leaving you and Peter to some heavy petting that did not involve Groot.

The following Friday night you and Peter were eating at his place, trying your best to ignore poor Groot who whimpered beside the table. Steam was rising from the fresh pizza that sat on the table and as appetizing as it looked your stomach couldn’t help but twist with a little guilt. But pizza wasn’t something exclusive to Bucky, that’s silly. You could have pizza– it’s food, it’s fine. You shook off the thoughts.

Groot’s eyes followed the slice in hand to your mouths, gruffly barking in frustration because he wanted some.

“Down,” Peter commanded after Groot pawed at him.

You gave the dog a sympathetic smile, feeling bad as you continued to eat. Your eyes shifted towards your screen that lit up with a message from Wanda, wondering if you were going to make it tonight. You hadn’t hung out with everyone in a long time, spending whatever days Peter had off together. And then there was the fact of really not wanting to run into a certain someone, but Wanda assured you Bucky was not there.

It would be nice to introduce Peter to everyone, maybe Steve could change his attitude if he met the man that made your cheeks ache from smiling so much.

“My friends are all hanging out at a bar right now and invited me so, I don’t know if it’s too early for this but if you maybe wanted to come with me?” You cringed at yourself, realizing how you unconfidently rambled on.

“Sure kitten, I’d love to meet your friends.”

“Really?” You bit your bottom lip, smiling widely as Peter’s hand reached over to caress your cheek.

“I’d do anything for you.” The light sparkled in his eyes as he stared at yours, dropping his gaze to your lips and gradually back up again.

You would have texted Wanda back if your fingers hadn’t carded through Peter’s hair, your lips on his as he lifted you up, your thighs wrapping around him as he carried you to the bedroom. An unwatched table left Groot alone, happy to steal a slice for himself.

The night air was cool on your hot skin, still a little sweaty after your romp with Peter. You wondered if the smell of sex lingered on you, walking towards the bar together and stopping every few paces because Peter couldn’t keep his hands off you. With his arms around your waist he pulled you close to him, the metal gate of a closed store clanging as he leaned against it to capture your lips.

You were all smiles by the time you walked into the bar, hand in hand with Peter. Your eyes lit up when you spotted Steve and Clint, with Peggy and Natasha being revealed the closer you got to the table. You saw the back of Wanda’s head and were about to call out for her but your voice died in your throat as you spotted two familiar faces.

Bucky, and with him was that woman, Claire.

Your lips press tightly as you stare at her. Looks like Bucky kept his date after all, adding another fuck buddy to his mix since you left.

“Hey Y/N! Glad you could make it!” Sam waved you over.

Wanda whipped her head around, her brows raising with concern. With the squeeze of Peter’s hand against yours you put on a smile. Sam was the first to get up and introduce himself but you took over, introducing Peter to everyone including Bucky and the woman whose name you pretended you forgot.

“I have to go to the bathroom,” Wanda said, smiling tensely.

She grabbed your arm before you had a chance to stop her, pulling you into the women’s room.

Her hands balled into tight fists that she shook in frustration. “I wish you told me you were coming. I thought you didn’t answer because you weren’t and Bucky only showed up like twenty minutes ago but if I knew I would have– ”

“Wanda, I don’t care.” She studied your smile, looking for cracks in the facade she knew you had to be wearing.

“Uh huh, okay.” She rolled her eyes not believing you. “It’s barely been three weeks and you’re telling me that you don’t care? That’s bullshit Y/N and you know it.”

“Wanda, I mean it!” you snapped. “Bucky and I had sex– that’s it!” The cutting motion of your hand emphasized your words. “I’m with Peter now and I’m happy so you need to drop it, okay?”

You pulled the handle of the door roughly, wanting to quickly get back to Peter. A smile graced his face with everyone’s eyes on him. You slid in next to him, catching the tail end of a question Clint had asked.

“Hmmm craziest story. Well there was a time we got called to an apartment in Queens because this kid had a Q-tip stuck in his ear.”

Everyone wore a look of confusion that only grew the more Peter spoke.

“It was this high school kid with his buddy and one of ‘em thought a spider crawled in his ear. So apparently they were trying to shake it out but it wasn’t working so the other thought they could dig it out with a Q-tip but he pushed a little too far and panicked, thinking it was stuck in his brain.”

“And what happened?” Peggy asked.

“The EMT’s were able to remove the Q-tip but the whole time the kid was freaking out, saying he could feel the spider biting him in his ear but they didn’t see anything.”

Claire spoke up, not that you wanted her to. “That’s why I always advise patients not to stick anything in their ears.” Whatever miss know-it-all, I’m sure Sam would say the same thing too.

“But the weirdest thing is that a week later I saw this same kid walking by the station so I ran out to see how he was doing. He turned down an alley and then he was gone, disappeared outta nowhere. So I look up…” Peter paused, making eye contact with everyone before finishing, “... and he’s climbing up the walls– like a spider!”

Everyone burst into a fit of laughter and Peter admitted the first half of the story was true. He wrapped his arm around you, proud to have seemingly won over your friends’ approval. Most of them at least. You tried not to make eye contact with Bucky but it was hard. You felt his gaze burn deeper with every sign of affection Peter showed, and anytime you happened to give in and catch his eyes you felt your upper lip tremble.

But this was fine. The chapter in your life with Bucky is over. It wasn’t even a chapter really, it was a short story, a few lines of prose and it’s over. This is fine.

This is fine...

It took a while to fall asleep that night. Even though your body was desperate to rest after another an amazing round of sex with Peter your mind could not shut off. You were thinking of Bucky and the emotion that poured through his eyes, the tense line solidified in his lips. Was he upset with you? He couldn’t be. You haven’t done anything wrong. You weren’t the one that fed him lies and played with his heart like a game, tossing it aside for a shinier toy. No. If Bucky is upset that’s all on him, because he let you go and not the other way around.

In the early morning you and Peter walked with Groot until you went separate ways, the two of them heading to the station to begin Peter’s shift and you headed home. You didn’t bother sneaking in like you had before. If Bucky heard you then whatever, you don’t care, but you don’t want to speak to him.

Last night had been very awkward, having not said a word to each other. You’re not sure if anyone who wasn’t aware of the situation realized there was tension, though Natasha had given you a curious look when you said goodbye. If she didn’t know she probably suspected and you’re fairly certain you’ll be under interrogation soon.

You couldn’t help but wonder if Bucky was under the same scrutiny. His mom was still tagging you on Facebook posts, a mix of funny animal videos and “mom approved” memes. Does she know what happened? Probably, considering the Fourth of July is coming up and she hasn’t extended a barbecue invitation. Does she know about Claire? So far you hadn’t seen Claire Temple on her friends list.

Yes, you stalked her through Bucky’s Instagram. It’s not a big deal, you just wanted a little more information about who she was.

                                              Claire Temple            Compassionate Helper 👩🏽‍⚕️ Avid Runner 🏃🏽‍♀️ Coffee Addict ☕

Scrolling through her photos you learned she is a nurse and (after having a minor heart attack) you learned she used to work at Metro-General. She doesn’t post much, a few pictures of the sun setting between the skyscrapers or graffiti on the side of the building; typical aesthetic pictures. But sprinkled in between those were pictures of her with people; colleagues from her new job at Sacred Saints, smiling as her arms barely wrapped around a brick of a man; her brightly colored sleeves popping against the umber of his skin. She grinned from ear to ear with him, ex-boyfriend perhaps?

Stop stalking her Y/N, stop it now!

You exit her profile, vowing not to look again though you’re not sure how much you trust yourself to keep that promise. But then again Claire was just one of many people that Bucky was sleeping with, so unless she was insanely clingy you didn’t think she’d be flaunting a picture of a guy she knew she didn’t have a chance with.

Besides none of this mattered anyway. Even if Winnie invited you to a barbecue you wouldn’t have been able to go because the Fourth of July happens to be Steve’s birthday and everyone was getting together to celebrate.

Luckily Peter had off the whole weekend and you were so happy he was coming with you. He looked very handsome in his FDNY shirt with casual shorts that showed off his thick calves while you stuck with a mostly red, white and blue theme, breaking out your red converse again with jean shorts and a blue tank top with stars on it.

In the late afternoon you boarded a crowded train to Brooklyn where Peggy’s friend Carol was happy to host a party to celebrate America and America’s ass. Apparently that was her nickname for Steve, teasing him with it because she knows how red he turns when he hears it.

Steve and Carol became close because of Peggy and though she seemed a little reserved at times you could tell they had broken the ice with each other. You met Carol before, seeing her at Steve’s apartment, and with her girlfriend Val when everyone went out for Peggy’s birthday a few months back. Carol lived in a building right off the water in Brooklyn Heights and had the perfect view for fireworks.

Hand in hand you and Peter walked down a lively street with kids riding their bicycles past you, and rhythmic music flowing from open windows. You were buzzed into the building, climbing up a hefty flight of stairs before reaching Carol’s apartment.

Val opened the door, her face lighting up as she threw her arms around you. There was barely a moment to admire the white stars painted around the eyes of her light brown skin as she introduced herself to Peter, catching him off guard in a welcoming hug before inviting you both in.

“Can I get you guys something to drink?” she asked, gesturing to the assortment that filled the kitchen counter, various bottles of soda and seltzer, beers, bottles of liquor. “Firecracker jello shot?” she offered, holding out a tray of them.

“I think I’ll say hi to everyone first, thanks,” you replied, making your way into the living room.

Steve was staring at the view from the window, setting the beer down from his hand when he heard you call his name.

“Happy Birthday!” you greeted, hugging him tightly. “What’s this?” You smirked, pointing to his jaw as he and Peter were saying hello. “Too lazy to shave on your birthday?”

Steve ran his fingers along the beginnings of a scratchy beard. “I think I’m growing it out.”

“I wonder what Peggy thinks… Peggy!” you turned to shout for her, seeing her on the other side of the room with Carol.

You said hello to them, meeting a few of Carol’s friends along the way. Soon more of your friends showed up and you were having a great time until Bucky and Claire walked through the door. You were the closest one to the entrance, wishing you had Peter by your side to distract you but he had been caught up in a conversation with Carol about her time as an Air Force pilot.

“Uh hey Y/N,” Bucky spoke, your name a foreign word on his tongue, “Happy Fourth.”

It was probably because of the fact that you were on the spot, with all eyes on you as Sam shouted for Bucky, that he leaned in to give you a half hug. Your palms didn’t quite make it up to return the favor. His touch reminded you of the ways he had you crying out his name, but now you shivered because it all felt wrong. Claire actually hugged you though she was a little hesitant, unsure if meeting you once constituted a greeting like this.

You made your way back to the living room, uneasy and in need of a distraction, not finding that in Peter who was still deep in conversation. Clint’s gaze caught you from the opposite side of the room, and he signed asking if you were bored. You shook your head, forcing a smile and signed back, “Not with you here.”

Clint strode over, grabbing a handful of chips first before he stopped beside you. You hadn’t seen him that much so it was nice to catch up a little. He was so happy the school year was over, hoping now he and Natasha might have some time to actually plan their wedding.

“Speaking of couples, it’s weird to see that, right?” He nudged his chin towards Bucky and Claire.

“What’s weird?” You’ve seen Bucky’s fuck buddies before, that girl Dot tried to weasel her way into hanging out with everyone on St. Patrick’s Day but at least Bucky had the common sense to spare you all.

“Bucky. That he actually settled down. Who would’ve thought?”

Clint chomped on chips as your mind spiraled into panic. You tried to control the tremble of your voice as you asked for more details, finding out Bucky actually decided to date Claire. Bucky Barnes. The man that’s fucked more people than the American healthcare system was actually, seriously, honestly in a committed relationship.

Your heart pounded in your chest, overwhelmed by this knowledge that has you on the edge of screaming at the top of your lungs and bursting into tears. Your feet took you straight to Val, not having to do much convincing to get her to do a jello shot (or three) with you. It seemed she had sampled a lot already herself and you wanted to feel just as loose.

She wooed loudly, grabbing some patriotic tinsel that decorated the table and placing a bunch first behind your ear and then hers. She stumbled a little bit but you caught her, both of you laughing as you helped her stand somewhat upright, fixing the metal necklace engraved with some sort of Norse symbol from around her neck.

With a bit of booze in you things didn’t seem so bad, except for walking down the stairs, that wasn’t the best idea, but by the end of the night that’s what everyone did. Carol’s apartment was on a dead end street that led right into the entrance of a pedestrian walkway that stretched out above the highway. It had perfect views of Manhattan, the Brooklyn Bridge and the beautiful booming fireworks display.

Peter stood behind you the whole time, his arms around your waist, face nestled in your neck pressing a kiss that made you squirm in delight. But your mind was cruel, reminding you of Bucky’s lips where Peter’s had been; of the chill on Bucky’s nose as he sought the warmth of your skin; of Bucky’s hands around you, holding you close like a puzzle piece fitting perfectly together.

The fireworks were reflected in the tears of your eyes, that you thankfully brushed away before anyone noticed. That was the last night you hung out with your friends as a group.

You couldn’t do it anymore, seeing Bucky and Claire hurt. Maybe it was the lies, all the bullshit you ate up like a starved child. And then it hit you.

Bucky wanted a relationship, but not with you.

PART 23

[rpd-rookie]

Do You Know Your Alphabet?

NSFW Edition feat. Chris Redfield

A – Anal:        Anal is not something that Chris fancies mostly because he believes his girth would be a liability. He never tried it and doesn’t intend to out of fear of hurting his partner.     If anal is your thing, it will take a lot of reassuring and a hell lot of patience to convince Chris to give it a try. And even if you miraculously manage to persuade him, Chris will permanently ask if everything’s okay while doing it and it will be the only time he tries it, as he will probably refuse to do it again.     However, and this is a secret he refuses to confess, he loves getting his asshole licked. A partner gave him an ass job once and it drove him crazy in spite of the reluctance he had at the beginning.

B – Bondage:           Chris is not the kind of man that would tie his partner up but he has nothing against being tied up. When he was part of the S.T.A.R.S. unit and used to own a pair of handcuffs, he once let a partner use them on him and found it really arousing.           But bondage remains very occasional and especially rather simple and soft. A bit of rope or a piece of clothe around the wrists is enough for Chris. Don’t offer to bind his entire body with rope and to hang him up from the ceiling. That would actually scare the shit out of him.

C- Cumming:           He always comes inside his partner. He knows it’s risky but he doesn’t care. He is not a fan of condoms and he wears them only if he doesn’t have a choice. He is the kind of man that would drop the “they’re not confortable and you can’t feel a thing” kind of speech.             But since Chris only has sex when he is in a relationship, not wearing a condom is rarely a problem. Accidental pregnancy will be happily accepted if it happens. After all, Chris would love to be a father (#RedfieldBloodlineSecured)

D- Dominance:         Despite his impressive massive stature, Chris is not a dominant (nor is he a submissive). He is a good boy who likes to take the role his partner wants him to have. But Chris can’t do extreme. His dominance always remains rather gentle. He doesn’t know excessive roughness or brutality. What he believes is roughness is actually fucking his partner from behind hard enough to hear their ass slap against him. And when it comes to submission, most of the time it’s just him letting his lover ride him.             Chris would never do BDSM since he strongly believes that there’s only place for love and tenderness in sex. No pain for the man please. He suffers enough on the battlefield everyday.

E- Erection: Chris doesn’t get aroused easily, a secondary effect of the steroids he used to take back in early 2000. So his partner needs to be patient and very touchy-feely to get him hard. Few kisses in the neck and wandering hands caressing his body won’t be enough to give him an erection. You must play with him and be a tease. Have fun with his cock and his body in general and you’ll get the D.       Moreover, nudity almost leaves Chris indifferent. He spent too much time seeing too many naked bodies in locker rooms while training with the Air Force and the BSAA to be aroused by nudity so unless you improvise a strip-tease, getting naked will almost keep him limp.

F- Foreplay: Always. Chris can barely imagine sex without foreplay and he is quite an expert when it comes to it. He sort of had to be since Mother Nature made him too big for any partner to welcome his girth without foreplay or some good lube.     Fingers, mouth, Chris will use everything he’s got and take his time to please his partner and he will do it gladly. He is more of a giver than a receiver in that matter. It suits his caring nature and his generosity.     But being a giver doesn’t mean he doesn’t like to receive. He will happily accept blowjobs, handjobs and even assjobs. But he will never ask for them. It’s his partner’s job to guess what the man wants.

G- Gangbang:         That’s a non-negotiable ��Hell no!”         Chris has a really bad memory of gangbangs. When he was training to join the Air Force, he once accepted the invitation of some fellow comrades for a “festive event in the dorm”. Turns out the festive event was more a gangbang than the party Chris had imagined. As soon as everybody started making out and getting undressed, Chris used an urge to smoke as an excuse to leave. And of course he never came back. Since that day, don’t talk to him about gangbang or threesome or any sexual interaction that would involve more than two persons. Sex is for two and two only.

H- Handjob: He prefers blowjobs but he convinced himself that hand jobs are certainly more comfortable for his partner since giving a fellatio to Chris Redfield almost requires you to be able to stretch your jaw like an anaconda if you want to take him properly.         But let’s move on to hands jobs. He likes his partner’s grip wet, firm and quick but he doesn’t like his balls being touched too much. He is very ticklish. Oops.

I- Intimacy:   To Chris, sex must be intimate. He is not the kind of man that will have sex in public places. The fact of getting caught doesn’t turn him on, quite the opposite. He will definitely feel really uncomfortable if there were even a slight chance to be seen or heard. That is why he often has sex at home.           When he was younger he used to fuck in his car because he refused to do it in his room knowing that Claire wasn’t far. The sweetie wanted to preserve his little sister’s innocence and also avoid the walk of shame in the morning (The Redfields were leaving with Barry’s family back in the days). This is one of the reasons why he wasn’t really sexually active in his young years.

J- Jerking off:           He doesn’t and hasn’t done it in years. When horniness strikes him, Chris always tries to get his mind out of it by doing something else. Most of the time he goes to the gym or for a run around the neighbourhood.             Chris has associated jerking off to adolescence, when he used to buy porn magazines with his friends and hide them under his mattress.       One day, his mother found his intimate little collection and she asked his father to give him a talk on pornography and on sex in general. That was really awkward but Chris believes that this conversation was a turning point in his sexuality. It taught him how meaningful sex is supposed to be and that a partner is not a mere toy but someone to respect and love. That’s maybe why Chris never really had one-night stands and why he is such a softie in bed.            

K – Kink:       He has no real kink nor does he have fetishes. But there are things he likes such as making sex a little playful on occasion, but nothing too wild.       Once, when he used to date a girl from the BSAA tech department who was younger than him (he was around 35 and she was in her early twenties), he gave the DDLG kink (DaddyDom/LittleGirl) a shot because that’s what she wanted to do but that was really awkward and it almost turned Chris off. As much as he saw no problem in calling her Princess or Baby, being called Daddy was not something he really appreciated. To Chris, the whole thing had a weird incestuous vibe and it made him feel rather uncomfortable.   But now that he is in his late forties, maybe he’ll give it another shot and see the thing differently. Who knows.      

L- Love:         To Chris, there is no sex without love and outside a relationship. Chris is not the kind of man that fancies one-night stands and he always takes his time before allowing himself to share one’s bed. He will never have sex after a first date.   Chris believes sex tastes a thousand times sweeter when you are in love with your partner. So definitely no hook-ups for him. Chris had a few one-night stands back in Raccoon City when he used to go and grab a few drinks with Joseph and Forest on Saturday nights. Forest had a bad influence on him. He was always the one to tell him to “enjoy life” and to talk him into having some casual sex with a random college student. Each time Chris was drunk and ended up waking up with no memory of the sex. That was awkward but not as awkward as the “Sorry, I don’t know why I did this” part because, let’s face it, S.T.A.R.S Chris was a puppy that definitely would apologize for having a one-night stand.

M - Massage:           Oh yes. Give his sore body a good massage after days and days of chasing BOWs and terrorists in mud and dust and Chris will be the happiest man in the world. Massage (and cuddles …and sex of course) is the only thing that can make him relax and forget about the BSAA for a few minutes.   However, Chris is not very talented when it comes to give his partner a massage and he is aware of that. He always put too much pressure on their muscles with his big hands and his body sadly often crushes them.

N – Nudity:   Even though he is rather body confident and spent more time than he wished getting naked and showering in mixed locker rooms, Chris is not the kind of man that would spend a day naked at home. He always wears shorts and tank tops. A habit he took when he was a teenager getting yelled at by his mother for walking around the house shirtless. Mama Redfield was rather prudish.         But that doesn’t mean Chris is modest. He doesn’t mind sharing the bathroom with his partner or getting naked in front of them. And he can take a shower with them without getting a boner. Nudity doesn’t arouse him unless his partner makes it sexual.

O – Oral sex:                                   Oral Sex Expert is a crown no one can take away from Chris Redfield. His penis being rather fat and way above average (which is a blessing and a curse), Chris has no choice but use his fleshy pink lips and nice tongue to prepare his partner for what’s to come. But don’t mind him, he likes doing it, feeling intense pride and pleasure in seeing his partner melt under his mouth … and his fingers cause the first can’t go without the other. His partner needs to be stretched and wet for him otherwise it might hurt like a bitch. And he knows it to well cause he caused pain to some partners when he was younger and lacked experience.     Chris also loves blowjobs but he knows that his penis is not easy to take in mouth.  So if his partner doesn’t want to give him a blowjob he won’t complain. He hates the sound of gagging. So, don’t try deep throating. Suck his tip and he will be happy. And maybe use your hands at the same time.

P – Position. Chris is very cautious when it comes to positions. He has a big fat cock and he is very aware of it. When he was young, he used to take a certain pride in it but that was before he realised that girth is not always practical. Chris knows that if he becomes overzealous he can easily hurt his partner. That’s why he tries to avoid positions that allow deep penetrations, a misfortune for someone who has a very classical view of sex like him.     Chris is not an original lover and he is not very curious. You’re more likely to find a Bible in this night shelf than a Kama Sutra.  So don’t except any crazy positions in bed. Sex with Chris is almost conservative and, sadly, often routine. Missionary, doggy style, cowgirl, spooning are basically the only positions the guy know and unfortunately for him he can’t do the first two because of his girth. That’s why he found a way to adapt them.     In missionary position, he always makes sure his lover keep their legs together. The tight squeeze gives him the impression he is all in while it gives his lover enough of his D.         Same goes for doggy style if you choose to do it on a bed. Otherwise (and Chris will love it) you can do it standing.         Standing positions are very easy with a man as gifted as Chris.

Q – Quickie:             Almost never. Chris likes to take his time while having sex especially when he knows he’s probably not going to get off for a while if a mission is planned. Quickies happen when he is in a hurry and his partner craves some quick release. When he used to date a fellow BSAA colleague, quickies in mission (especially if they lasted long) sometimes happened but always in very secluded places. No one must know what the BSAA Captain liked to do in his intimacy.      

R – Role Play:           It will never be his idea but he doesn’t mind it as long as it isn’t something fucked-up (like incest for instance) or highly ridiculous and far-fetched. Don’t show up in a nurse or airhostess costume. You would only make him laugh. And don’t do something that needs a lot of imagination because the guy doesn’t have much. Stay simple and make the role-play relatable for him. Call him “Captain Redfield” while showing up naked under in his BSAA t-shirt and tell him you need some intense training session with him. Or, if you’re in a dominant mood, pretend you’re his boss and tell him he needs to apologize for screwing the last mission. His first role-play was when he was S.T.A.R.S and it was the classical cop/inmate role-play.

S – Stamina:   Sadly, Chris doesn’t have much stamina, again a direct consequences of taking steroids in his young years. Therefore, sex can sometimes be quick with him especially if he gets too enthusiastic.       To overcome this problem, Chris will adapt his pace to delay his orgasm and he will often take breaks. During those breaks, he will happily go down on his partner to keep them aroused. He will also edge many times to make sure he can give his partner the release they deserve. He will not stop fucking them until he feels them crumble against his body.

T – Talking:   Chris is very complimentary. He often tells how beautiful his partner is and how good they feel. But apart from those compliments, Chris doesn’t talk much. He won’t give verbal orders to his partner and he will make them understand what he wants with looks and gestures. If he wants you on top he will simply lie on his back and nod you to straddle him. If he wants you to suck his cock, he will caress your hair and glance at his manhood.             However, in spite of lacking loquaciousness, Chris growls and grunts a lot and he is very loud. Hell, even his breathing is noisy. When the man is fucking, you can be sure that his neighbours know about it. What do you want? A big man like him in a bed can’t be discreet.       Speaking of bed, I hope your bed is solid because it will creak and slam against the wall with a man like Chris in it. Maybe it’s time to invest in a new headboard or to think about fucking on the floor.

U – Underwear:       Chris wears briefs because they are the most confortable to him. Trunks and even boxers are often too tight around his thick thighs, which can be bothering especially to run while on mission. Comfort before looks, always.           Chris doesn’t care about the type of underwear his lover wears since he always takes them off and he would never find his SO ugly anyway. He would fuck them even if they wore grandma underwear. Sure he won’t say he doesn’t appreciate the sight of his lover in some nice fancy lingerie but he doesn’t need that to be turned on.  

V – Virginity:                       Chris used to turn people’s heads back in high school.  He was already tall (taller than most student to be honest) and had a quarterback-ish build that made everyone drool. Plus, wearing leather jackets and listening to rock music gave him a sort of bad boy’s look and everybody knows how craved bad boys can be. But even if he looked like one, Chris was no bad boy. He was just a bit rebellious and very stubborn, having no problem with defying his teachers. He got in detention quite a lot of times because of that. But despite his handsomeness, Chris wasn’t the type of young man to use his looks to get a girl. He was actually not even aware of how attractive he was and he actually had no real interest in girls, preferring playing guitar and listening to music in his room. Plus he was a bit goofy around girls. He didn’t know how to flirt with them or to realise when someone was hitting on him.             Therefore the girl that took Chris Redfield’s V card wasn’t a random girl. She was a friend of Claire he had known for years and had happened to grow fond of in spite of Claire’s opinions. He took her virginity and she took his on the backseat of his car. But unfortunately he broke up with her soon after because he chose to join the Air Force. Claire never truly forgave him for that.

W – Worship :                       He likes butts, round fleshy butts that he can see bounce against him and grab whenever he wants. When he kisses you, Chris always let his hands roam towards your rear to gently squeeze it and he will often stare at it if he’s got the occasion to do so. While having sex, he will always squeeze it especially if you’re on top of him or doing it doggy style. And if he can, he will also grind his cock between your cheeks.

X- Xenophilia :          Chris is a man that gives little attention to his partner’s appearance. Of course, he needs to feel attracted to them but, to Chris, what matters the most is chemistry. You can be the most gorgeous person in the world and use all the cards in your sleeve to get the man, if there is no chemistry Chris won’t even consider you. However he can’t deny he has a thing for natural beauties and simplicity. Eccentricity doesn’t attract him, on the contrary. And he has a soft spot for light-coloured eyes.       He has no problem dating person who is way younger or way older than him. Again all is a question of chemistry.

Y – Yearn:     He never truly asks for sex, at least not verbally. Chris is not the kind of man that will tell you. “Love making tonight?” or “Let’s go upstairs, darling”. If he is horny he will simply say nothing and let you notice that he wants to get laid. Often, it’s very easy since that a horny Chris Redfield is a touchy-feely Chris Redfield. Plus, his eyes always darken when he wants to have sex.

Z – Zzzzz:       After sex, Chris falls asleep very quickly and he always sleeps like a log. Nothing can wake him up after a good orgasm and that’s simply because love-making is one of the rarest moment he can truly relax and forget about all the troubles linked to his work. He always sleep with his partner nestled against his chest. But careful, he snores.

[fvrxdrm]

Prove It

Leon x Reader

Movie: RE: Vendetta

Warnings: Smut/Cussing/Blood and Gore/ Probably sucks 'cause it's my first time/ Long

"Y/N!" The mutated monster threw you of the building you were currently on. This was it. You were going to die after years of fighting off real life nightmares. That was until you landed on something but it wasn't concrete. You didn't splat.

"Thanks for the save"

"No problem. Can't let our favorite agent die now can we?" D.C. replied through the radio.

Scanning through the plane you found a grappling hook just sitting on the floor waiting to be used. Perfect.

"Nadia, cover me. I'm going back there"

"Roger that, Y/N"

Nadia positioned herself at the entrance of the plane on her stomach with a gun in front of her.

"D.C., position the entrance facing Arias"

"Copy"

The plane rose up as it turned for the opening to face the mutated Arias.

"I am going to spill your guts all over" Arias' claws grew longer and sharper slightly caressing Leon's stubble.

"No time for shaving off beards, partner! Yeehaw!" You grappled your hook on an edge of the building and threw yourself, not forgetting to kick Arias on the face and grabbing Leon off of Arias' grasp. A white light struck Arias and the neighbouring buildings causing you to squint your eyes and fall down.

"You okay?" You breathlessly asked Leon who also fell beside you.

"I should be the one asking you that"

Glenn ran, jumped off the building and grasped to the left wing of the plane causing it to slightly spin.

"Shit" Nadia mumbled a cursed.

After the monster was kind of comfortable to do something else he grew his claws again passing through the plane, stabbing Nadia in the process. There was a roar all of a sudden, something coming from an engine. It was Leon on his bike, ready to do whatever he planned to do. He rode off and jumped his bike as it smashed through balcony to hit Arias.

Leon drew his gun "Catch!" and shot the motorcycle causing it to explode and detach a part of the beast's body. Arias lost contact with the plane and fell off but it didn't end there. He grew his deadly claws again and grasped to a building and the plane.

You grabbed a gun and ran off to the edge of the building where you can see Arias.

"Bye, dad", you whispered to yourself and pulled the trigger. It was gruesome. Blood everywhere with the bits and pieces that were once part of your dad's body together with a wedding ring.

You never even noticed a tear slipped through your cheek until a hand was put on your shoulder. You wiped off the tear and turned around to see Leon with concerned eyes.

"You alright"

"Yeah, I'm okay it's just...it shouldn't end like this. I never thought that I would meet my dad this or even thought of having a dad like him"

Leon didn't say anything else and just pulled you in a rather comforting hug. Grasping the back of his jacket tighter, burying your head on his chest as you sobbed harder. Him caressing your hair while kissing the top of your head. His actions were enough to calm you down a bit and cause you to flatter.

☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️

You held onto your left torso as you watched Rebecca inhaling and exhaling the vaccine that would help her turn back into a normal human. When veins returned to being invisible, eyes turn back to their natural color she looked at you and Chris and gaveyou both a weak thumbs up. The plane rose up to where you were. Nadia pressing her hand to where she was stabbed and D.C. saluting you...kinda. Anyways, Leon walked up beside you with his left hand holding his right arm.

"One more thing left to do"

"So, let's do it"

☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️

The vaccine was deployed around the city, removing the virus from each of the citizens' body.

"And once again, we find ourselves back where we started" Rebecca broke off the silence that was surrounding the plane.

"Yeah. Kind of. First I want my naturally wavy hair back, my top, my shorts, and my cardigan back, these earrings off, this stupid dress off, this cakey makeup off, and these fucking heels off" you retorted furiously at what that asshole made you wear.

"You look great in straight hair" Rebecca chuckled lightly at you.

"Um...do you know how much I took care of my hair only to be ironed like a million times? My hair's already damaged!"

Leon ran his fingers through your hair.

"Looks and feels healthy to me" he stated.

"Whatever"

"We got the bad guys. Hope we made the world a little safer"

"Yeah. I finally met my dad. Ended up brutally killing him. I don't know if I'll ever forgive him for killing my mom and now...attempted to kill all...even his own daughter"

You felt Leon's hand on your shoulder giving it a little squeeze.

"Just take your time. It'll be alright"

You placed your hand on top of his and smiled sadly at him.

"Yeah, thanks"

Silence surrounded us again until Leon spoke.

"Hey, Chris!"

Chris turned his head to Leon's direction.

"How much longer can we going on like this?"

"I don't know...I never make plans that far ahead"

Leon smiled at shook his head at how Chris retorted back what Leon said at the bar.

Rebecca and I looked at each other and smiled at how they were starting to grow on each other

☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️☁️

The next day, You were writing a report when a knock was heard on your door. You looked through the peephole and saw Leon standing there with his hands in his pockets. Opening the door, Leon pulled his head up to look at you. He was flustered and he seemed nervous.

"Hey, Leon! Come in"

You stepped aside to let him in and closed the door behind you.

"Do you want anything? Water?"

"No, I just came here to talk to you"

"About?"

"Um..."

"Leon, just spill it"

"I love you!"

"What? But you already established that you don't have feelings for me"

"I know, I just"

"Leon, you can't just toy my feelings around. You said it already. You're in love with Ada ever since you met her back in Raccoon City. You can't just say you love me just because Ada isn't around"

"I'm not. I asked Chris for help and that's when I found out I was just blocking off my true feelings for you. I don't love Ada. Heck, I don't even like her that much. I just thought that I had feelings for her when she kissed me back in that cable car. It's dumb. I've been really complicated since then. But after everything that we've both been through, it's hard not to think about you anymore. I've tried to stop it but I just can't. Y/N I really really...really love you"

There was silence between the two of you for a second until you stepped a little closer but still far from feeling his breath.

"Prove it"

He didn't waste his time and closed the gap between the two of you. He cupped your cheek and passionately kissed you. You put one hand on his chest while the other slid up from his shoulder and onto the nape of his neck. His left hand slowly slid down from your waist and grasped your ass. You gasped at the sudden action and he took this opportunity to slide his tongue. Your tongues fought for dominance and the kiss was growing heated every second. You removed your jacket and threw it without caring since you'll find it later anyway but for now, you just focus on ehat was currently happening. He removed his jacket also not long after, tossing it just beside to where jacket laid. You pulled him closer and he pinned you to a nearby wall while wrapping your legs around his waist. His lips parted from yours and started kissing your jawline, your neck and down to your collarbone. You started gasping at how gentle his touch was.

Sure he may be one to be really hard and aggressive when it comes to enemies but when it comes to this type of stuff, it would feel like a feather was caressing you.

You ran your fingers through his as your left hand held on to his shoulder for dear life. It feels rather...amazing. Perfect to be exact. He found your sweet spot and started licking, biting and sucking it, making sure to leave a very visible mark for everyone to see.

Once he was satisfied, he put you down and started kissing you again but there was something more in it. Lust. You were both experienced, that's for sure, but it felt like it was your first time again.

He pulled away for a second and looked directly into your E/C eyes.

"You sure you want to do this?" He softly asked.

It's something like this he does that make you fall in love with him even more. He wasn't demanding when it comes to sensitive topics like sex. If you were okay with being rough then he'll go for it but otherwise he'll make sure to be tender. If you want to do it he'll go for it if not then he won't force you to it.

"Yeah. I want you"

He closed the gap again while heading to your bedroom. It was a struggle really. Bumping into things. You were sure you'll get a couple bruises because of it.

Once you got to your bedroom you closed the door behind you. He intertwined your fingers together and held them above your head. He was back on kissing your neck again.

Getting impatient, you slid your hands down and held onto the hem of his shirt. You broke the kiss and pulled his shirt off revealing his toned torso.

You gently pushed him to your bed while you got on top of him. You copied his previous actions and kissed his jawline, neck and collarbone. You also made sure to mark him yours by biting, licking and sucking his weak spot. It was gratifying to hear his groans and gasps as he becomes weak into your touch. He held onto your hair as you continued to lick down from his chest, abdomen and finally to his v line.

He pulled you up again to meet your lips. He caressed your hips and then ran his hands under your tank top, pulling it up to remove the the piece of clothing and tossed it somewhere in the room. You resumed your make out session while his hands roamed around your body until he reached the clasps of your bra and unclasped them, letting them fall down your arms.

He flipped the both of so he now was the one on top and started leaving wet kisses throughout your chest. He moved to suck on one of the buds leaving you weak under him. You tugged his hair and dug yourself further onto the pillow under you.

"Leon" you breathlessy moaned at the attention your chest was receiving. Your core grew more heated and you started sweating more. He groaned at how you said his name. In all honesty, he likes--no--loves it when you call his name. May it be to comfort him, argue with him, or even just normal conversations but this one, he found it foreign yet really arousing at the same time. It sent a jolt down to his manhood.

He removed his mouth from your nipple and did the same thing to the other one.

You have to be dreaming, right?

Last time that you checked you saw him and Ada kissing. It's either that or-

"Ah, fuck!" You didn't even notice Leon already removed your pants and underwear and was already licking your slit. You held onto his tighter as he began to nibbling and licking your clit.

"L-leon, shit!" Again, he groaned at the mention of his name and you felt the vibration to your core sending you off the edge. He licked off your juices and then climbed up to your eye level. He connected your lips again, the parting and meeting of your lips breaking off the silence together with gasping and panting from the both of you. He took his time exploring every inch of your body. It made you feel loved, protected, safe, something you didn't know you were wanting for a while. You glided your hands through his torso and to where the belt of his pants were, quickly unbuckling it. He sat up and removed the button and unzipped his pants, too slow for your liking. You quickly sat up and wuickly pulled his pants down together with his boxers revealing his *cough* long, hard and throbbing dick. A nice sight to see actually.

"Desperate are we?"

"It's not like you aren't either"

He pulled you again for another kiss and settled you down on the bed again.

"You ready"

"Ready when you are" you stared up to the ceiling as he steadied himself to your entrance. Once he entered inside of you, you gasped at how big he felt, bigger than how it looked like you fluttered your eyes shut and curled your toes. Leon groaned at how tight you were. He let you adjust to his size before slowly moving in and out of you. He took your hands and intertwined them together above your head just like before before slowly picking up his pace. You wrapped your legs around his waist helping him push deeper into you.

"Fuck, f-faster, Leon"

He placed a quick peck on your lips before moving thrusting faster. The air smelled of sex, skin slapping, profusely sweating, groans, grunts and moans leaving your lips. You grasped tighter to his hands while screaming profanities and his name over and over again. It was music to his ears. He wanted it. He loved it. He leaned down to your lips and kissed you hungrily again. It was hard to keep up to the motion of his lips because of the pleasure he was giving and the attention your sex was receiving. You leaned back and he started kissing your neck. Then there was this feeling of a knot forming inside of you.

"I'm gonna come"

"Do it with me" you nodded in response.

You hissed, moaned and screamed as his thrusts became faster and deeper than possible. Fuck, you haven't had this feeling ever. Sure you had sex before but it wasn't like this. Those felt wrong to you and this? This felt really right.

His thrusts became sloppy and not long after he released his seed inside of you and you followed suit. He rested slowly dropped his body on top of you, careful not to put all of his weight on you. You were both breathless and tired. Both processing what just happened.

Using all of his energy that was left, he pushed himsilf up fell beside you and you closer to him while you rest your head on his chest and placed an arm on his abdomen.

"Have I proven it already?"

"Yeah, you did" you gave him a quick peck on his lips before drifting of to dreamland.

The end.

LOL this was long. Now I'm lazy to read it all over. If there's any grammatical error just message me.

[spidermecc]

Unintentional love (Elu fake dating AU) Ch. 3 - Never again

Elu fake dating AU chapter 3 is up. As always, comments and feedback is very welcome. I hope you enjoy, let me know what you think. Find it on AO3 here.

”Oh my God Lucas, just pick a fucking shirt, they all look the same” Basile grunted.

The boys had spent the last hour in the same mens-wear shop, trying to find a new shirt for Lucas to wear to the party tomorrow.

”Honestly Lucas, you’re already dating the guy, why are you so stressed out?” Arthur asked sympathetically, while Yann picked up two shirts and headed for the dressing room.

”Fuck off, I just thought it would be nice to look good for once, it has nothing to do with him” Lucas said, not completely being able to hide his blush.

He had never been the type to care about what he was wearing, but even though he’d rather eat dirt than admit it, he was probably trying harder because he wanted to impress Eliott. He knew he didn’t stand a chance anyway, and Eliott was just helping him out to be friendly, probably because he didn’t have many friends at his new school, but he couldn’t help but want to look a bit different at the party, and maybe, just maybe impress Eliott a little bit.

“Fuck it, I’ll just wear the same shit I usually wear, let’s go get something to eat, I’m starving” he said, giving up on trying to find anything nice. Everything he’d tried on was either way too expensive or way too .. not him.

“FINALLY, I was beginning to think I’d have to eat the granola bar that’s been in my bag for four years” Basille exclaimed, almost running out of the shop.

“Yeah, let me just pay for this and we can get out” Yann said, fishing for his wallet in his bag.

After they exited the shop, they found a nice little café with cheap pizzas and beers to hang out at. It was nice to chill with the boys, they didn’t do this kind of stuff often, but when they did, Lucas always enjoyed it, even though they drove him mad half the time. This time was no exception. They’d all been grilling him about Eliott all week, and Lucas had successfully avoided the topic every time.

“So tell us something about this mystery guy” Yan said, while cutting his pizza with the shitty plastic knife and fork the café had given them.

“I already told you guys a thousand times, there’s not much to say. We’ve just hung out a few times and well, yeah we’re seeing each other I guess” Lucas answered, trying to avoid the topic yet again.

“Nu-uh” Basile said taking a sip of his beer, “you’re not getting off the hook so easy this time. Tell us something about him, I mean how did you manage to hook up with him? He looks like an actual model, if I was gay or bi or whatever, he’d be on my TO-DO list” he said laughing at his own joke.

Lucas couldn’t argue with that. Eliott did look like a model. His perfectly messy hair, his signature brown jacket, and those eyes.. those eyes that Lucas saw every time he closed his eyes, were out of this world. But what did Lucas actually know about Eliott? He knew that he was absolutely stunning, that he apparently was interested in the foyer, he had no social media (none that Lucas could find anyway) and that he drew weird looking rats in the library alone. It wasn’t much to go on, and if this whole pretending to date thing was going to work, he needed more. He pulled out his phone and found his newly added contact: Mon mec <3

Lucas: Tell me three things I should know about you

As soon as he hit the send button, he started worrying. That was a weird text to send out of the blue right? Shit Eliott didn’t even have his number, he should probably tell him who’s texting.

Lucas: This is Lucas btw. Lucas: Your pretend mec, haha

Read

Putain, what the hell was that mess? He’d sent three incoherent messages and not surprisingly Eliott left him on read. Fuck, was he even going to show up to the party tomorrow after Lucas sent him weird ass shit like that?

“Are you texting your boyfriend?” Arthur asked, mouth full of peperoni pizza, oil dripping down his chin.

“Nah, it’s Mika, he forgot his keys, so I have to head back, see you guys tomorrow” he said, desperate to get out of there, go home and bang his head against the wall until brain cells, that he obviously didn’t have, magically started to appear.

“Okay, see you tomorrow man, can’t wait to meet Eliott” Yann said, with such an honest smile that it broke Lucas’ heart. He really hated lying to his friends, especially Yann.

“Yeah, he can’t wait to meet you guys either” he answered, putting on his scarf, feeling like an absolutely horrible friend.

____

When he finally got home he threw himself on the bed and yanked his phone out of his pocket. Still no answer from Eliott. Of course not, why would he answer such silly messages from a complete stranger? While Lucas was contemplating how to tell the boys that Eliott would not attend the party tomorrow, without letting them know that he’d been lying he heard a pling.

Eliott: Phew, you just go straight to the personal questions, huh Lucas?

Shit, he’d offended Eliott. Of course he had. He could have at least started off with a ‘hey’ or a ‘thanks for agreeing to be my pretend boyfriend and going to a party with a bunch of people you don’t know’.

Lucas: I’m so sorry, I know that was totally out of the blue and weird

Eliott: Hahah, I’m kidding Lucas.

Lucas felt a weight lift off his chest. So Eliott wasn’t upset with him?

Eliott: I’ve actually just spent the last hour thinking of a good answer and I think I have it, are you ready?

Lucas: I’m ready, hit me

His heart starting racing out of nowhere. The prospect of getting to know Eliott, even if it was just three facts, had him sitting on the edge of his bed, tapping his foot on the floor in pure anticipation.

Eliott: 1. My spirit animal is a raccoon. 2. My favorite music is dubstep. 3. You’ll have to earn the third.

Lucas read and reread the message for what might have been ten times. Dubstep? Really? How was this mystery guy, who looked and talked like an actual angel, into freaking dubstep? Also, a spirit animal? Lucas had never even considered what his might be, but God, Eliott was an actual dork.

Lucas: How do I earn the third?

Eliott: I’m sure you’ll figure something out.

Shit, was Eliott flirting with him, or was Lucas just imagining things? He decided not to dwell on it and continued tapping on his phone, forming a response quickly, so Eliott didn’t think he’d left him on read.

Lucas: So those rats with masks on them that you were drawing in the library were actually raccoons?

Eliott: RATS?! Wow Lucas, you’re already breaking my heart and we’ve only been dating for a week.

His heart started racing. He felt kind of sorry for teasing Eliott about his drawings, but he couldn’t help himself. He wondered if Eliott also had a huge grin plastered on his face right now, because Lucas sure as shit did.

Lucas: I’m a real heartbreaker, sorry

Eliott: Yeah, I noticed at the bus stop, no mercy huh? Eliott: So it’s your turn now, no?

The grin that had been dominating his face during the entire conversation fell as soon as he saw the message. Eliott had probably, maybe, meant it as a joke, but the prospect of Eliott thinking he was cold hearted, made him want to cry.

Lucas: Actually, I’ve got to go, I have a ton of homework. See you tomorrow at the party.

Eliott: Okay, see you tomorrow.

He threw his phone on the other side of the bed and buried his face in his pillows. He definitely wasn’t ready for tomorrow.

______

Lucas was standing in front of the bathroom mirror trying to tame his hair. He’d been in need of a haircut for a while now, but he barely had money to pay the rent, so spending money on a haircut was the furthest from his mind, when Mika barged in. “Looking good kitten, meeting up with your new man?” he said, toying with Lucas’ hair. “Yeah, we’re going to a party tonight” he answered, swatting away Mikas hands. “Bring him over to the apartment some time, I have to approve before you take the next step you know” he said, still playing with Lucas’ hair, not getting the hint. “Need to see what his intentions are with our little kitten” he continued, laughing. “Gosh, can you please fuck off Mika, the last thing I need is you scaring him away with your sex talk” Lucas answered, starting to get slightly annoyed. “Gee always so touchy, you know you have to loosen up a bit, or you’ll never get any dick” he exclaimed, finally pulling his hands away in defeat. “Have fun, remember to use a condom” he finished with a wink, leaving Lucas’ hair in a worse state than it was to begin with.

As soon as Lucas left the apartment he regretted not bringing his scarf. The cool night air was already starting to sting, and he could feel his ears starting to cramp from the cold. He’d agreed to meet Eliott halfway, so they could arrive together, making the whole thing seem more believable.

“Salut” he heard a voice from behind. There he was, Eliott Demaury in all his glory. He looked stunning as always, wearing a white t-shirt, a skin tight leather jacket and skinny denim jeans, showing off his perfect figure. Lucas was pretty sure his mouth was starting to water, but he tried not to dwell too much on it. “Salut” he answered, trying to sound nonchalant, and probably failing miserably. “Let’s go” Eliott said as he started walking. Lucas was struggling to keep up, seeing as Eliott’s legs were much longer than his, almost jogging next to the taller boy.

As they walked, it almost felt like they’d known each other for ages. Lucas kept joking about the raccoon drawings, while Eliott dramatically clutched his chest, as if Lucas was breaking his heart all over again. They talked about music, which subjects they liked and disliked, which movies they liked (Eliott’s favorite was Titanic, how cliché), until they finally circled back to the drawings.   “You know for someone who looks so innocent, you sure can be a sarcastic little shit” Eliott laughed, after Lucas, once again, had made fun of the drawings. “I’m sorry. And I don’t look innocent” he said, another laugh escaping him. “Yeah you do. You’re short but spikey” Eliott said continuing “you know what you remind me of?” “What?” Lucas said, looking up at the taller boy, clinging on to every word he said. “A hedgehog” he said, bursting into giggles. “A what?! I do NOT look like a hedgehog” Lucas exclaimed, trying to look upset, but he was pretty sure the huge ass grin on his face gave him away. “Whatever you say, but I’m pretty sure that a hedgehog is your spirit animal” Eliott said, lightly puffing Lucas shoulder. Lucas couldn’t help but smile at how cute Eliott looked when he was smiling and joking and he wished that they could just keep walking for hours, talking and laughing.

As they reached the apartment, Eliott swung his arm around Lucas, who involuntarily flinched. “Calm down, it’s just for show right?” Eliott said, seemingly amused by the expression on Lucas’ face. “Yeah, sorry” he answered, staring down at the ground. As soon as they entered the smoke filled apartment, they were greeted with his loud friends. “LUCAAAAAAS” Basille screamed, trying to drown out the music. Yann shook Eliott’s hand, introducing himself as Lucas’ best friend, and Lucas felt a pang of guilt wash over him again. He really hated lying to his friends.

After the boys had introduced themselves, they all went out onto the balcony, where Arthur was trying to roll a joint, but failing miserably, having drunken one beer too many. “Here, let me” Eliott said, reaching out and taking the paper and weed from Arthurs trembling hands. “Damn, good looking and good with his hands, what a catch Lucas” Basile exclaimed, and Lucas had a sudden urge to throw him over the balcony. “I’m the one who got lucky” Eliott said with a wink, not taking his eyes off Lucas. He couldn’t help think of, how in another universe, they were actually dating, and he was happy and contempt with his friends and his gorgeous boyfriend getting along. But right here, right now, it all felt a little bit too much, and Eliott’s gaze made him feel sad about all the things he wished he could have but didn’t.

“It’s getting pretty cold, I think I’m going to head inside” Lucas said, grabbing his beer from the balcony floor. “I’ll go with you, here you go” Eliott said handing over the joint to Arthur, “nice to meet you guys, we’ll catch up later” he continued as he swung his arm around Lucas, and opened the balcony door for him. They had only been doing this for an hour or so, but it was already proving very difficult for Lucas to handle it. Every move Eliott made, seemed effortless and natural, he almost let himself believe for a second that they weren’t pretending.

They headed inside, and got comfortable on a couch in the corner. “Your friends are cool” Eliott said, taking a sip of his beer. “Yeah they’re great, they can be a pain in the ass, but they’re really the best friends a guy could wish for” Lucas answered honestly. “I’m jealous of you, you know” Eliott said, staring intensely at Lucas. “Huh?” “You have these great friends, and I can tell how much they care about you just by the way they were trying to impress me, it’s adorable” Eliott said, his smile dropping faintly. “I’m sure your friends are great as well” he answered, trying to cheer Eliott up, desperate to see him smile again. “Yeah, something like that” he said, putting the beer bottle to his mouth, almost finishing it in one sip. “I’m gonna get another one, can I get you anything mon mec?” he asked a playful smile lingering on his lips. “No I’m good, thanks” Lucas said, a faint blush appearing.

Eliott had been gone for almost twenty minutes and Lucas was starting to get worried. As he was getting up to look for him, a guy came over and sat down next to him. Lucas looked at him, and got the feeling he’d seen the guy before, but he couldn’t quite make him out. He had long blond hair, tied up in a tight bun, wearing a navy blue shirt and a silver necklace around his neck. “Salut, I’m Curtis” he said, handing Lucas a new beer. “Salut, Lucas” he answered, still scanning the room for Eliott. “Why do I get the feeling that I’ve seen you before?” he asked, confirming Lucas’ suspicion that he looked familiar. “I’m not sure, but I think I’ve seen you before as well” he answered, not fully committing to the conversation, still concerned about Eliott’s whereabouts. “I’m friends with Idriss, maybe you know Imane?” the guy said, scanning Lucas’ face, trying to catch his eye. “Are you looking for someone?” he finally asked. “Yeah sorry, I’m looking for my uh.. my-my boyfriend, Eliott” Lucas said, feeling awkward saying the lie out loud to a stranger. “Eliott is your boyfriend?” the guy asked, looking surprised. “Yeah, uhm why- do you know him?” Lucas answered, nervous that he’d overstepped, by calling Eliott his boyfriend to someone who might actually know him. “I don’t know him personally, but Idriss mentioned him a few times” he said, continuing “but uhm I saw Eliott on my way over here. He went into a room with Lucille, his ex-girlfriend” he said, looking slightly uncomfortable. “His what?” Lucas asked, his heart stopping for a few seconds. Eliott had an ex-girlfriend? Here at the party? Why hadn’t he told him? “Yeah, I recognized her from some photos Idriss showed me of them a while back” Curtis continued. Lucas could feel the heat rising to his face. He felt like he’d been completely fucked over. If Eliott wanted to hang out with his ex, which probably wasn’t an ex anymore if they’d spent such a long time alone in a room, he could have just told him.

“Hey, come on, I’m sure they’re just talking” Curtis said, trying to cheer Lucas up, who was now busy fiddling with the sticker on his beer, trying to hold the tears at bay. Why was he so upset? Eliott had upheld his part of the deal, he’d met his friends as Lucas had asked, so he probably thought it was done and over with. “I have an idea, let’s get some shots huh?” the blonde said, getting up and pulling Lucas up with him, dragging him into the kitchen.

Ten minutes and five shots later, Lucas was absolutely fucked. His vision was blury and he could feel himself babbling, not sure what words were coming out of his mouth, but apparently Curtis, who hadn’t stopped laughing for two whole minutes, found it very entertaining. “Can I tell you a secret” Lucas said leaning into Curtis, almost whispering in his ear. “Yeah, shoot” “Eliott and I aren’t actually dating” he said bursting out on laughter. It all seemed so funny and stupid right now. They hadn’t even been able to keep up the act for one night before Eliott was off with his ex and Lucas was spilling the secret to strange guys. “Come again?” Curtis said, seemingly confused. “Yeah, we’re just pretending, it’s aaaaaall fun and games” Lucas continued, still laughing like a maniac. “But why?” “Was trying” he was literally struggling for air, it all seemed so silly right now, he couldn’t stop laughing, “to get rid of a girl” he finally managed, taking another shot, almost spitting it out in the process, not being able to contain his laughter. “Wow, that’s.. that’s a relief” Curtis finally said. “Huh?” Lucas had finally stopped laughing and looked at Curtis, for the first time tonight he noticed how he was actually quite handsome. Not Lucas’ type at all, blondes just weren’t his thing, but he was definitely good-looking. “That means that I get to ask you out, what do you say” Curtis said, flashing a smile at Lucas. Lucas wasn’t sure what was happening, but he found himself giggling “suuuuure thing” he managed, between giggles. He was definitely too drunk, because this guy couldn’t actually just have asked him out right? And what had he answered? He suddenly couldn’t remember anything. But before he had time to process what just happened, and what he’d said, he felt his stomach turning. Without a word, he ran to the bathroom, knocking over some girl in the process, desperate to reach the toilet before he spilled his insides all over the floor.

After five minutes, Lucas had thrown up everything he’d drank all night and probably all of his meals the past five days. He managed to get up and wash his mouth and face, and got out of the bathroom, desperately looking for his jacket. He needed air, he needed to get out of here, when a hand touched his shoulders. “Eliott?” he said turning around, not able to hide his disappointment when he saw the blonde guy before him. “Hey are you okay? You just ran away, and locked yourself inside the bathroom, I was getting worried” “Yeah I’m f-fine” he managed “have you seen Eliott?” “He left with Lucille, I think” Curtis said, not meeting Lucas’ eyes. “Oh.. of-c-of course.. I should go as well” “Want me to walk you home?” Curtis asked, hand still on Lucas’ shoulder. “No, no, I’m good, I’ll see you later yeah?” he said, grabbing his coat from the couch and practically sprinting out of the apartment.

He wasn’t sure how or when he got home, but he finally managed to get to the apartment and throw himself on the bed, not bothering to take off his clothes. ‘Never drinking again’, he thought to himself, closing his eyes, trying to will the room not to spin, never again.

[screamfairy1996]

A villain`s tale.

Warning:there will be some heavy/triggering topics involving murder,death,torture,and references to non-con in this story. If it makes you uncomfortable by any means you do not have to read it.

“Who the hell are you?” One prisoner asked.

The man sneered. “Well.I`m a old visitor to UA.

5 years ago

TIME-SKIP TO 10 MINUTES AFTER THE JERSEY INCIDENT .

The man watched as the two boys comforted each other in a recovery room. So it`s true. The two are mates. And their names are Izuku Midoriyaand Shouto Todoroki. And Todoroki is the son of the number two hero, Endeavor. And word on the street is that All Might is mentoring Midoriya and might be his secret love child. “Interesting .” The man thought, writing his notes. This Midoriya boy.  He`s a pretty sight.  A step up from that other sweet piece of ass. That red idiot was a fool in leaving him all alone in the house.  Maybe Todoroki will think before leaving him out of sight. Otherwise, Someone might claim him. “ The man grinned evilly. This will be fun. But first, he’s gotta off someone or Shigaraki will keep bitching about not doing his job since one guy is MIA and another villain dropped out to escape the pros. Does the freak know it’s not easy since the school has tightened security since the attack on USJ and had their students moved in dorms since the training camp attack, an kidnapping of a student, All Might’s retirement and the apprehend of All For One. There goes his pay. Great. The guy who could pay him is in prison but Kurogiri assures his pay will come due once he’s completed his task. The man scoffed. They better have his fucking money once he’s done cutting up the brats. But the green whore. Speaking of him. Isn’t he the crazy bitch who kicked Jersey’s ass because the reindeer socked his moronic shithead Alpha because the peppermint dumb ass couldn’t take a fucking joke. Midoriya could have slept with anyone. That bitch might have as well wrap his legs around that blonde spiky one or even most of Class 1A. What’s so special about that whore? He’s an omega. All omegas are nothing than sexual pleasure and baby breeders. They are meant to obey Alphas and occasionally betas no matter what. That burn on his arm. He maybe pissed off Todoroki and learned his lesson. Whatever, He needed to do his job and get the money so He can go back to America and pay her a visit. As soon as he`s paid. He`s getting the away from those fuckers.

Time-Skip to after Riki was born.

The man stood outside, smoking outside of UA gates. “Hey, Look over there.”  Shigaraki rasped in his comm. The man growls. That bitch really needs to contain his attitude. The man groans and did what he was told. His eyes widened. It was Shouto and Izuku and Izuku has a little bundle in his arms. He took a closer look at the bundle. Lays a infant with red-white striped hair and mismatched eyes. It was a girl with Todoroki`s blue eye and Midoriya`s green eyes. “She has her father`s hair.” The man spoke under his breath.

Back to Present Time

‘’Such a nice happy family.” The man smirks, twirling his shiv. “But not for long....:’ “

Back to Flashback.

The man was hiding in the closet. He managed to get inside by  shape-shifting into a janitor. He made he had drops of the real janitor`s blood. The man didn`t had a Quirk so it was painless. Eventually, his skin mask was itchy and he had to take it off. Soon Mineta came across him. “What`s going on?” The grape kid asked. “None of your concern.” The man insisted. Mineta took a closer look which made the man more annoyed. “Do I know you from somewhere?” Mineta asked.  “No.” The man said. “Now please leave. I`m trying to clean here.” Mineta didn`t budge . “You`re not cleaning, you`re sitting and taking notes in the ground. “ Mineta stated. The man growls. “You`re a fucking drag, you know that? Peeking at girls.” Mineta scoffs. “They have nice chests.” Mineta turns to leave but realized something. “YOU!! You were the one who killed four kids back in America!!! You`re a murderer. Wait till the pros hear this!!” Mineta cried. The man grips his knife in his pocket. “The pervert has to go.” The man thought as he dug his knife out......

The man stuffed Mineta`s bloody corpse into the garbage. He was lightweight unlike his past victims.  The man then realized something. Shit!! He doesn`t have any more drops of blood and pros will be suspicious when Mineta doesn`t turn up. Then a idea shot in his head. He could masquerade as the kid. The man grabs his voice changer and the needle. He injects several drops of blood into the needle, like 35 drops. This will last for months. He tossed the corpse into the closet, locking the door. Once he`s done cleaning the blood and evidence, He injects into his arm vein. Once, the blood was injected, He growls in pain. This was extremely painful due to Mineta`s quirk and small height.  The transformation was completed. Now he can get near students.  He can get his money and get out of here. This is gonna be a piece of cake.” The man thought, as he walked to the dorms with the keys he stole from Mineta.

2 to 3 weeks later.

The man, posing as Mineta was yeeted out by Bakugo once again for peeking at the one of the girls`’ skirt. The man dusted himself off. “Son of a bitch. Up yours asshole.” The man thought as he walked to the common room.  He noticed Izuku and his baby in the kitchen room. “Great ,that whiny bitchy omega is here.” the man thought. “Man, Todoroki got himself a nice piece of ass.’’ The man said. The greenette got scared and even more frightened when the man uses Mineta`s grape quirk to block the doors. The annoying thing starts crying so he moves it out of his way. He then advances...... The sounds of slashing, screaming , cutting, a baby crying, and a horrific scream filled the room.....

“You did that to him?” The prisoner asked in horror.

The man simply stared with a blank look on his face.

The teachers and students rushes in after hearing a girl scream in terror. They were soon greeted by a horrific sight.  

“No, buddy. Izuku did that to himself.  Izuku and his whoring legs. He was a tease. Izuku was begging for anyone to do him. It`s not my fault, the whore had a nice ass and he was a great fuck. “ The man cackled maliciously.

The man hid in the shadows as he watched Todoroki rushes in and once he started crying. The man smiled evilly. He broke the son of Endeavor and killed All Might`s apprentice. Now he gets his cash and leave Japan. He chuckled as he left his hiding place........

“Then his shitty boyfriend shows up, trying to kill me. I might have been a little rough, They were all trying to murder me for what happened. I told them they`ll get their revenge over my dead body. They all agree and try to off me but their friend called them out, warning Todoroki not that he`s not helping Izuku. They were such idiots. They were all too busy, beating each other up,doing teen stuff, and fucking each other to know who I really was.

“I`M GONNA KILL YOU, YOU SON OF A BITCH!!” Todoroki yelled in rage. The man chuckled. “Best sex, I`ve ever had.” A fight breaks out which turns intense.

The man gets angry. ” I revealed myself and everyone was shocked.  Being found out wasn't a problem, butt getting your ass whooped by the number one hero., now that's a bitch. “

All Might punches the man in such ferocious anger and seething rage. Later, as the man is restrained and escorted to the police van. He noticed Todoroki sitting on the ambulance, cradling his baby.  The man gets angry, struggling against his restraints. ‘’YOU CAN`T BEAT ME!!! YOU CAN`T BEAT ME !!!YOU CAN NEVER BEAT ME!!!! I`LL FIND YOU TODOROKI! I`LL FUCKING FIND YOU AND FUCKING KILL YOU!!!! YOU`LL BEG FOR MERCY. I`LL FUCKING CUT YOUR INSIDES IN FRONT OF YOUR MATE AND BRAT!!! I`LL THROW MIDORIYA DOWN AND MAKE YOU WATCH ME FUCK HIM!! YOU AND THOSE PROS WILL FEAR ME, MOTHERFUCKER!! YOU. WILL. FEAR. ME!!!  ALL OF YOU WILL!!!” The man kept ranting as the doors closed and the van drove off......

The prisoner grew more disgusted. “And the other boy?” He asked.

“It`s not my fault, that bitch was dead on his feet.” The man shrugged. “It`s just a dead whore.”

The prisoner backs away from him in fear. The man shrugged and looked at the sky through his window.  He smirks evilly.

“Soon, Shouto. Izuku. I`ll get out of here and pay you a visit. I can`t wait to play with your mate again, Shouto. Don`t know where and don`t know when but soon. I`ll finish on what I started....”

[goretzkastits]

Peinlicher Cringe Lurch - The Hummels Dating drama told in songs <3

N.M.E. - Set It Off

okay, we get it, you're both a happy couple. why else go through the trouble of posting it ten times a day?

When I Grow Up - The Pussycat Dolls

when i grow up, i wanna see the world, drive nice cars, i wanna have groupies [...] but be careful what you wish for, cause you just might get it

Love Drunk - Boys Like Girls

I used to be love drunk, but now I'm hungover

Kiss and Sell - The Maine

I need to find myself a new chick, i need to kiss a set of new lips. she's gotta be something new to me, fresh drinks, someone new to please [...] if I had to guess, i'd say we have a mess, you could sell

Paparazzi - Lady Gaga

not sure what it means, but this picture of us it don't have a price

Social Climb - I Don't Know How But They Found Me

come break some hearts now, tear them out, filing for amusements with the crowd

Fick Ihn Doch - Alligatoah

ok die song lyrics passen nicht, aber der titel ok lasst mich

Casual Sex - My Darkest Days

I'm never gonna fall, but I'm never hard to catch. she said she's cool with it, she is down with it, there's nothing wrong with it, cause it's easier this way

Dirty Little Secret - The All-American Rejects

i'll keep you my dirty little secret, don't tell anyone or you'll be just another regret

You Give Love a Bad Name - Bon Jovi

an angel's smile is what you sell, you promised me heaven, then put me through hell

Homewrecker - Marina and the Diamonds

girls and their pearls and their gourmet vomit, boys and their toys and their six inch rockets. we're all very lovely till we get to know each other, as we stop becoming friends and we start becoming lovers

Treppenhaus - LEA

verpasster anruf grad' von ihr, genau gesehen und ignoriert. mann, warum machst du so 'n scheiß mit mir und ihr?

Scumbag - Goody Grace

She says I'm a scumbag, wants to take her love back, story of my life. why am I such an asshole? everything is my fault, happens every time

Groupie - Cate

he was so cool and cruel at the same time, he could do no wrong in my eyes, cause I was the groupie and he was the star

Angeleyes - ABBA

last night, I was taking a walk along the river and I saw him together with a young girl. and the look that he gave her made me shiver, cause he always used to look at me that way.t hen I thought maybe I should walk right up to her and say, it's a game he likes to play

FYI - Cassadee Pope

Nothin' has changed, from the bedroom to the pain except you're the one who's sleepin' there tonight

Revenge Is Sweeter (Than You Ever Were) - The Veronicas

i saw it in the news, you told me they were wrong and i stood up for you, cause i believed you were the one

Favorite Crime - Olivia Rodrigo

i let you treat me like that, i was your willing accomplice, honey. and i watched as you fled the scene, doe eyed as you buried me, one heart broke, four hands bloody

Mr. Perfectly Fine (Taylor's Version) - Taylor Swift

hello mr. perfectly fine, how's your heart after breaking mine?

Bad Idea! - girl in red

it was a bad idea to think you were the one, was such a bad idea, cause now everything's wrong

I Knew You Were Trouble (Taylor's Version) - Taylor Swift

i heard you moved on from the whispers on the street, a new notch in your belt is all I'll ever be

Cruel Game - The Relentless

if misery loves company, oh get the hell out of my house. won't you please just look at me? oh, why'd i let you under my blouse?

Did You Come? - girl in red

you should know better now, to fuck it up and fuck around. see yourself through my eyes, you're so fake, it's all lies

Fake Love Don't Last - Machine Gun Kelly

i want you to know that fake love don't last, so go ahead and pose like that and post like that

Do Re Mi - blackbear

if i could go back to the day we met, i probably would just stay in bed, you run your mouth all over town

Men Are Trash - Scotty Sire

he ain't shit, girl i know, he ain't shit, still want him though. men are trash and maybe you're a raccoon

Little Boy - Ashnikko

oh you think you're worth all the fuss?

Bois Lie - Avril Lavigne

girls cry and so will you

I DONT EVEN LIKE U - Royal and The Serpent

i hate this, you're chasing all these young bitches down the drain, pathetic, you're reckless

5 Of Your Exes - VVAVES

you're the kinda guy that can make a girl go crazy, but i don't mean love, i actually lose my mind [...] better watch out if you think he's mr. right

Deal With It - Ashnikko

emotional maturity for dummies, i don't have the time to pretend you're funny

Acting Like That - Yungblud

you're way too hot to be acting like that

Vanilla - The Maine

you're boring, face it, at your best you're still basic

All Too Well (10 Minute Version) - Taylor Swift

i was never good at telling jokes, but the punchline goes "i'll get older, but your lovers stay my age"

Careless Whisper - George Michael

i'm never gonna dance again, guilty feet have got no rhythm. though it's easy to pretend, i know you're not a fool

Sick Little Games - All Time Low

oh my god, I'm such a terrible mess, i'm turned on by the tabloids, you would never have guessed that I'm a sucker for their gossip. man, I take it too far

Queen of Broken Hearts - blackbear

i'm the queen of broken hearts, break you in a thousand parts

Heul Doch - SXTN

heul doch. ich weiß ja, es gibt so viel' schlimme sachen, bruder. heul doch. halt dein' kopf hoch, du wirst es schaffen, bruder. heul doch. trockne deine Tränen mit dei'm Pelz, heul doch, heul doch

Modern Day Cain - I Don't Know How But They Found Me

So now you've done a little wrong and you need to be forgiven by the Vicar and the company you keep. and then you conjure up a fiction, to get the pretty girl to listen. This is the sin, that I will confess to release myself from consequence and everyone can tell

[rabidwrestlingfan]

Operation Destroy

Author's note: This is a thing my brain created. Hope you enjoy. Too tired to be witty right now.... Oh yeah, and it's the sequel to Operation Switchblade 😉

Wren was exhausted both psychically and mentally. It felt like everything was falling down around her. Bullet Club was fractured at best, and she knew it would only get worse. Everyone would pick a side. In a perfect world everyone would side with Kenny and they could just get rid of the one who betrayed them. But this wasn't a perfect world. In the end Cody wasn't the only one who attacked Kenny, and they still didn't know who had stopped her rescue attempt. All she was sure of was that it wasn't the Jacksons or Marty. She trusted them enough to know they wouldn't do such a thing. The other members had an alibi, some could prove them and others couldn't. It didn't help ease her mind. She was still sidelined for the time being. 

Before Wren could linger on the thoughts Kenny came up behind her. "You're gonna go grey." He joked quietly, pulling her hair out of her face. "You say this like somebody has seen more than a few inches of my natural color in... Years." She retorted with a small smile. Instead of admitting his defeat he snaked his hand up her shirt and lightly ran his hand across her skin. Her back and left side were a map of ugly blues and purples. "How are you feeling?" He questioned softly, like he was afraid she'd break. "I'm doing alright. I've gone through worse." She answered truthfully. The Canadian nodded slowly as he continued to rub her back. She knew he blamed himself. Whether it was for her being at the curtain or him not being there she didn't know. She'd futilely tried to tell him he had nothing to do with it the night before, but he wouldn't hear it. 

"When do you leave?" Kenny asked after almost two minutes of silence. He knew she planned on going back to the States soon. After a few months of personal time she was looking forward to getting back into the swing of things. "Supposed to leave tomorrow night." Her plan had been to go with him back to the apartment and spend a few hours there before she left. She had to get her gear anyways. But she'd already been warned that her plans were going to change. She found herself thanking her aunt for insuring money wasn't a problem. Her inheritance had been the only reason she could put wrestling in the back burner. "Stay." He whispered just loud enough for her to hear. "It doesn't have to be for a long time. Just another week and I'll let you go without an argument. Just until we figure things out." The words were punctuated by a kiss to the base of her neck. He wanted to know who attacked her. He wanted to at least start planning his revenge. That's what he'd tell her anyways.

Kota had a feeling Wren would be a key part of the months to come. It crossed his mind as soon as he seen her laying on the floor just inside the curtain with blood smeared all over her face. It was proven when he seen the look on Kenny's face as soon as he seen her afterwards. So when they were walking to breakfast he made sure to distance her from Kenny. "He's going to cling to you." The Japanese man's words were hushed to further ensure only she would hear them. "He feels lost. He'll beg you to stay because he doesn't want to be alone. Stay with him. He needs to know that you're okay. It might even deter him from killing whoever did that to you."Just like that the man was gently nudging her forward and closer to Kenny. She didn't even get a second to reply. Yet she knew she had to listen to him. Even after just over three years of living with him she knew Kota still knew him better. Wren was sure he always would. So she'd went ahead and cancelled her flight and officially backed out of her bookings due to injury. Kenny had taken care of her, she couldn't just walk away when he needed the same. 

She was brought back to the present by curly hair tickling the side of her face. "Earth to Wren." Kenny joked before he placed another kiss on her temple. "Sorry. I was thinking about whether or not I called the hotel in Dayton and cancelled my reservation." She watched the understanding slowly wash over his face. "And you're stuck with me for at least two weeks, by the way." She added with a smile before slipping away from him and heading towards the bathroom. "I'm sure we can find something to do. Need help showering?" Kenny questioned with one of the first real smiles she'd seen since before his match the night before. "You know I hate to turn down a good thing, but shower sex is not on my to do list right now. In fact I'd rather get attacked by a rabid raccoon." She joked before closing the door. It was a few minutes later that Kenny heard her calling him. "What'd you forget?" He asked knowingly after he cracked open the door. "I grabbed the lotion instead of the conditioner." He couldn't help but chuckle. It wasn't until after he had helped her that he realised something had fallen out of her bag. He hadn't meant to read the note. "You have options." He mumbled, eyes going between the necklace at the bottom and the bathroom door.

The next couple of days had been largely uneventful. The two had spent the majority of it just lazing about the apartment. Except there was definitely a rift between them. Kenny's innocent jokes about sleeping with her had stopped. Even his actual attempts to sleep with her had stopped. There were no game tournaments or movie nights. He'd always make excuses about having other plans. It certainly didn't seem like he was clinging to her like Kota suggested. The colder her got towards her the more uncomfortable she got. He knew how she felt about Cody, so she knew he didn't think she was part of the mutiny. That didn't help her with the thoughts that kept running through her head. She started packing a bag when she woke up to an empty apartment on the seventh day. There was no note or anything. Just empty silence. The last thing Kenny expected when he unlocked the front door was to see her sitting on the couch crying. He knew that she'd hit the breaking point. 

"Wren?" His voice was a soft whisper. At one time that very whisper would have made chills race down her back. Now it was just another stab into her heart. "We don't have to do this. I can go. I'll find something to do with my shit and then... Just let me go." She begged him, futilely wiping her tears away. "Are you gonna tell me why you're running away?" He had the sense of mind to shut the door but didn't dare step closer to her. A dark chuckle left her before she was standing up. "Because this week has opened my eyes. It made me see things like they were. You treat me like I'm not even here, and I can't handle that. You've become such a big chunk of my life. I put you before everyone." He knew then exactly what was happening. "So you're gonna go run to White?" He asked sinisterly. His tone made her eyes go to his. "Excuse me?" Was all she could find to say. Where had he even gotten the thought from? "I seen the note in your bag in Sapporo. I thought it was because of the story about you not having a choice. I let it go. Then I grabbed your phone on accident the other day and seen the messages he was sending you. Figured you'd run sooner or later."

In a split second she was in front of him, a loud slap echoing in the silence. "How fucking DARE you, Kenny Omega! You had absolutely no right to invade my privacy like that. I'd never dream about doing something like that to you." She clenched her fists before turning away from him. Going to jail over a broken heart wasn't exactly something she wanted. "Besides, in case you didn't notice, I never replied to any of his messages. He's trying to toy with me. You fell right into his trap. But that's not even... You can't do that. You can't just act like you care about him wanting to get in my pants, when it didn't bother you a month ago. You can't play me like that anymore." In the end her voice was low. Kenny knew then what her problem was. In fact he'd known this would happen sooner or later. "I realised earlier that you'd never love me like I love you. That all my time secretly praying that you would was for nothing. I've always been yours and you'll never be mine."

The only thing she could hear was their breathing. His lack of an argument made her grab her backpack from beside the couch and walk over to the door. He hadn't moved even as she approached. "Wren... I need you..." His voice was rough as he spoke. Wren couldn't look up at him. She had to do this, and one look at him and she'd be done. "You don't and you know it, Kenny. I was just a naive girl that at least partially filled that hole in your heart. I was a placeholder. But he's back now, and you don't need me anymore." After a few seconds he finally moved so she could leave. He watched her go with tears in his eyes. A part of him did love her, but it was nothing like she felt. He'd known how she felt since they got stuck in the elevator nearly three years prior. In his head he could hear AJ berating him when he'd found out. The man had gotten so angry, and he wasn't afraid of voicing it. He'd always believed that Kenny was giving her a false hope. He had been.

The cab ride to the hotel had been full of tears and sympathetic glances in the rearview mirror. She felt broken and stupid. He'd told her from the beginning that they weren't exclusive, but then asked to room with her. It was an endless circle of will he won't he. Her thoughts drifted to the night she'd slept with Marty. It had started out as an innocent dinner whilst they awaited for their friend's arrival. By the end of the dinner she'd already told him how small she felt on terms of the Bullet Club. He made her feel cherished, but even then she immediately felt guilty. He'd assured her multiple times that she hadn't done anything wrong and he wouldn't mention it to a soul. The one time she'd brought it up he shut it down. He wouldn't let her beat herself up over it. In the back of her head she could hear Styles telling her that she wasn't where she was because of who she was sleeping with. She'd made it because of her skills.

Maybe it was her anger. Maybe it was heartbreak. She wasn't quite sure what possessed her to knock on the hotel room door later that night. He'd been toying with her and she knew it. All week he'd told her where he was staying and what room he was in. Even when he knew she wasn't there. On top of that were various messages about how she deserved better than the shattered remnants of Bullet Club. Maybe she'd regret it later, but at the moment she didn't care. Jay couldn't help but widen his eyes when he opened the door. He'd figured it would be a member of Chaos trying to be his friend. He never expected her to actually show up. "Make me forget." Was all she said when he opened the door. "You sure you wanna do this, doll?" He asked, eyes scanning the empty hallway. He'd barely heard her whisper a yes before their lips were together. He was quick to pull her into his room, kicking the door shut before pushing her against it. His lips trailed down to her neck when air became a necessity. A sharp nip just above her collar bone made her tug his hair with a gasp. "Don't worry, sweetheart. I'll make you forget." Jay muttered against her skin.

It wasn't until Wren rolled over to escape the sun that she remembered the night before. That was also when she realised she'd woken up alone. Her sadness was eased with the knowing that it was his room so he hadn't just run away. Once she got up she seen a bowl of fruit sitting on the desk with a slip of paper that had a smiley fave drawn on it. She spent the next half hour getting dressed and munching on the treat he'd left. She was getting ready to leave when the door opened and Jay came in carrying two cups of coffee. "Morning, sleepyhead." He joked before handing her one of the cups. "Didn't know what you liked so I just grabbed a regular coffee and a few sugars and whatnot." She was in awe as the creamer cups kept coming. He'd gotten three of nearly all of the options. She didn't even comment as she fixed her coffee. She didn't know what to say to the kiwi.

 Suddenly his fingers were brushing against her neck. "Guess I got a little worked up. Sorry." He muttered before a smile graced his lips. "Guess it's a good thing you have an excuse to wear that puffy scarf." Those words made her freeze. "Huh?" She muttered in panic. She thought all the way back to the first time she'd ever seen him trying to think of any other time he had seen her in the scarf. "That giant zebra looking scarf you were in Sapporo." He answered like it was obvious. She set her coffee down before she turned to look at him. "It's my good luck charm, and I wear it anytime one of the guys have a title on the line. My aunt made it for me." Wren stated simply, watching his demeanor change. He went from relaxed to on edge as soon as she finished talking. "And the only way you would have seen me in it is if you seen me at the curtain when I was going to help Kenny..." She trailed off with wide eyes.

Suddenly the kiwi in front of her laughed. "I'd hoped to keep you going for a little longer... But looks like I got too caught up." He admitted with a sinister smirk. "I must say that it was remarkably easy to get Jessicka to help me. Seems like there's a lot of bad blood there. I just asked her to incapacitate you before he made it backstage, but she did so much better." Her mind was racing and she barely heard his words. Of course Jessicka would help bring her down. They hated each other. "Operation Switchblade may have ultimately failed but Operation Destroy is going great." He continued to taunt her. "How the hell did you know about that?" She snapped at him finally. Had a Bullet Club member ratted them out to the other factions? "I was trying to find you before New Years Dash and when I did I overheard you and Omega talking about it. It actually made me chuckle. You sure do have original names." Any sensible person would have left then. They wouldn't give him the pleasure of watching them work it out. But she had to unravel the sweater. 

"So you get the belt from Kenny and that deepens the divide. Page comes out and Kenny immediately denies that and so on. Where do I fit in all of this?" She honestly couldn't put that part together. "Are you saying that you haven't pushed them away since that night? That you haven't been at least a little bit suspicious of everyone that wasn't in that ring that night?"  Wren wished she could prove him wrong, but he was right. She'd blown off everyone but the Bucks and Marty once they got back to the hotel. She was so scared that one of them was a traitor that she just stopped communicating. The once live and ridiculous group chat hadn't been touched since that night. "Without you they all fall down. And all the important pieces have fallen. That IS why you're at a hotel, right?" Jay queried before he chugged the rest of his coffee. That made her blood run cold. Kenny. "You son of a bitch!" She yelled before she ran out of the room, door slamming behind her.

By the time she got back to her own room she had talked herself out of just showing up at the apartment. She'd been cruel to Kenny when he didn't deserve it. She'd turned her phone off before she'd even left. It would have undoubtedly rang all through the night. Yet when she pulled it out of her bag she just stared at it. What would she say? Confirming Jay's part in things wouldn't fix what she'd done. Knowing the truth didn't extinguish her fears of another brother turning their back on her. Would Kenny even answer if she did call? Wren sat down with her back against the bed, still stating at the phone. What was the right course of action? Suddenly there was a loud persistent knock on the door. "Wren? Wren, open the door." Her eyes widened when she heard the voice.  What the hell was he doing there? Slowly, she stood up.

[raccoonfallsharder]

✩˚₊‧♡ Blackmail Material ♡‧₊˚✩

masterlist [COMPLETE] | main masterlist

18+ only | no use of y/n | f!reader | complete | word count: 30,591.

a classic tale of "that fuckin raccoon found your sex toy." post-endgame friends-to-lovers smut with feelings.

i am not writing off the possibility of an epilogue someday (a "one year later" scenario won't fully let go of my brain) but for now i feel like this story has been told and we can leave these two to enjoy their smutty little lives together. back to main masterlist

Collects 3 of 3 Parts. ♡‧₊˚✩

♡‧₊˚✩ Part One: Blackmail Material [8/7] you've been hiding one - or maybe two - things from your best friend on the Bowie. unfortunately for you, now he knows. smut with feelings + fluff. sex toys, voyeurism/exhibitionism, impact play.

♡‧₊˚✩ Part Two: Self-Sufficience [8/28] rocket deals with the emotional aftermath of your night together, engages in some kinda-sad masturbation, and learns that deep down, his most-secret kink is having sex with someone who loves him. fuck. smut with feelings + fluff. angst, sexual fantasy, dirty talk, oral sex (f receiving), spanking.

♡‧₊˚✩ Part Three: Bioluminescent [10/23] rocket finally decides what he wants. you're glowingly happy to oblige. smut with lotsa feelings + fluff, dirty talk, begging, light dom/sub elements, little bit of oral, references to impact play.

if you’d like to be added to my fanfiction taglist, please comment or send me a message or ask!

[raccoonfallsharder]

˚ʚ♡ɞ˚2023 in review

i was thinking about doing a "year in review" but then i realized that's just. everything so far. so you could check out the ˗ˏˋ★ˎˊ˗masterlist ˗ˏˋ★ˎˊ˗ if that's what you want.

here's the highlight reel though!

fluff. smut-free, can usually be read platonically or romantically ✮ spice. explicit lines or references ✩ smut. abbreviated explicit sequences ❤︎ smut. detailed/prolonged explicit sequences ❤︎❤︎

everyone's fave: ✩˚₊‧♡ Blackmail Material ♡‧₊˚✩ [COMPLETE] ❤︎❤︎ 18+ only MDNI | no use of y/n | f!reader | 3/3 parts | word count: 30,591. a classic tale of "that fuckin raccoon found your sex toy." post-endgame friends-to-lovers smut with feelings.

the one that started it all: ⋆｡°✩ The Very Boring Adventures of Space Pilot & Sweatshirt Girl ✩°｡⋆ [COMPLETE] ❤︎❤︎ 18+ only MDNI | | no use of y/n | f!reader | 5/5 visits | word count: 37,783. In Rocket Raccoon: Grounded (2016) / Issue #3, Rocket asks a stranger on the ferry to "make sure nobody does anything weird" to him while he naps, and the stranger just, like, abandons him while he's sleeping?? who does that? when a stranger asks you to watch their stuff in a coffee shop, it's a holy obligation. x100 if it's a hot local space pilot trying to catch some Zs on the ferry. get in loser we're gonna fix it. first installment in the ⋆｡°✩ Domestic Scenes in Space Travel ✩°｡⋆ series. comics-based but you don't need any comics background knowledge to ride this ride.

my very first kinktober!: °˖✧♡ kinktober 2023 ♡✧˖° [COMPLETE] ❤︎❤︎ 18+ only MDNI | no use of y/n | f!reader | 12 complete days | word count: varies. just a lot of raccoon smut (usually with feelings). mind the ao3 tags. minimal editing (ie, typos abound; concepts are superficial; in kinktober we say "fuck everything - including plot").

a fluffy anthology of eight oneshot reminders: ✩࿐࿔take what you need [COMPLETE / ONGOING] ✮ fluff | gn reader | no use of y/n | drabbles | word count: varies. the world is hard, and sometimes it's difficult to complete daily tasks & take care of yourself (aka rocket bullies you for your own damn good). this is about as wholesome as it gets (for me) i think. can be read platonically or romantically. mcu-based, meant to take place post-volume-3, but headcanon however you want ♡

my (current) personal fave oneshot: adorations 𖥔 ݁˖⋆.ೃ࿔*:･ [COMPLETE] ❤︎❤︎ 18+ only MDNI | no use of y/n | f!reader | oneshot | word count: 4,518. you have a habit of complimenting rocket. he decides to give you plenty of reasons to keep doing so. aka rocket has a praise kink and no-one can convince me otherwise. mcu-based smut with feeeeelings. set sometime shortly after volume two. dirty talk, (light) biting, (light) degradation, use of slut as a term of endearment. fast-burn enemies-to-lovers & angst with a happy/hopeful ending. praise kink, obviously. part of ⋆ ˖ ⁺ ‧₊ ☽ anthology ☾₊‧⁺˖⋆

other notables! let me love your OCs ˗ˋˏ♡ˎˊ˗ ✩ over fifteen pieces of fanart for fellow gotg fans!

˚₊‧✶headcanons & minifics✶‧₊˚ [COMPLETE / ONGOING] ✮ fluff | no use of y/n | gn reader | complete | word count: varies. twenty-two headcanons, minifics, & drabbles! mostly fluffy, sometimes angsty.

Window Across the Galaxy ✧*:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ* ❤︎❤︎ 18+ only MDNI | rocket x f!oc | 23/27 chapters | wip | word count: pending. 23 of 27 chapters in this longform fic (to be completed this february!)

˚ʚ♡ɞ˚ 2024 aspirations

january

Window Across the Galaxy ✧*:･ﾟ Chapter XXIV & XXV ❤︎❤︎

florescence❀, chapter four year three: flowering. ❤︎

✩࿐࿔ take what you need. just buy the damn thing already & it's fuckin' laundry day.

february

Window Across the Galaxy ✧*:･ﾟ Chapter XXVI & XXVII [COMPLETE] ❤︎❤︎

florescence❀, chapter five year four: formation. ❤︎❤︎

✩࿐࿔ take what you need. get some frickin' sunshine. ✮

⭑˚.⚘𖡼𖥧𖤣 windfall, part one: planting. ✩

march

florescence❀, chapter six year five: dispersal. [COMPLETE] ❤︎❤︎

✩࿐࿔ take what you need. have you taken your meds today? ✮

⭑˚.⚘𖡼𖥧𖤣 windfall, part two: ripening. ❤︎

･:*𑁍✧˚₊ eavesdropper ₊˚✧𑁍*:･ oneshot. ❤︎❤︎

april

⭑˚.⚘𖡼𖥧𖤣 windfall, part three: plucking. [COMPLETE] ❤︎❤︎

real *ੈ✩༄‧₊˚ oneshot. rating TBD

꧁:･☁︎ ⋆. cicatrix ⋆. ☁︎ :･꧂ part one & two. ❤︎❤︎

may

꧁:･☁︎ ⋆. cicatrix ⋆. ☁︎ :･꧂ part three & four. ❤︎❤︎

warm compress ☾.༊·˚⋆⭒˚｡⋆ oneshot. ✮

june

꧁:･☁︎ ⋆. cicatrix ⋆. ☁︎ :･꧂ part five & six. [COMPLETE] ❤︎❤︎

untitled⋆｡°✩ Domestic Scenes (aka Sweatshirt Girl) ✩°｡⋆"finale" [COMPLETE] ❤︎❤︎

july

᠊ᡃ࡚ࠢ࠘ ⸝່ࠡࠣ᠊߯᠆ࠣ࠘ᡁࠣ࠘᠊᠊°.⋆｡✶˖ evasive maneuvers (practice expansion) parts one & two [COMPLETE] ❤︎❤︎

★♫｡°𝄞☕︎✎▤ other duties as assigned ▤✎☕︎ 𝄞°｡♫★ begins? [LONGFORM / SLOWBURN].

august

sunshine ☀︎ ⋆⁺☁︎⋆₊⊹ (sunshine expansion) unknown parts. ❤︎❤︎

★♫｡°𝄞☕︎✎▤ other duties as assigned ▤✎☕︎ 𝄞°｡♫★ begins? [LONGFORM / SLOWBURN].